#or ‘i want to write more on this but I’m so tired I got 2 hours of sleep’
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cosyvelvetorchid · 17 hours ago
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Alt meet bucktommy prompt: instead of Buck and Maddie riding in an ambulance after Doug kidnaps her, the weather is too bad so they airlift them out. Tommy is the pilot. He hears Maddie asking after chimney and Tommy is like “howie got stabbed??” Anyway, Tommy ends up staying at the hospital to check on Chimney (another reason why Chim feels comfortable enough to call him for the water drop later on) and while Maddie and Chimney are having their moment, Buck and Tommy have one in the hallway outside his room.
1. Thanks for the prompt. I enjoyed writing this one.
2. Love your username!
3. Enjoy! 🩶
**********
Buck wanted to cry with relief when Maddie was being lifted into the helicopter to fly her to hospital. He didn’t—he kept himself together for her sake. She needed him to be strong right now, even though he himself was in absolute awe of Maddies own strength in surviving what she had. Surviving that son of a bitch Doug. If she hadn’t have killed him, Buck would have.
“We’re almost there, guys.” Pilot Kinard said through the mic.
“You hear that, Maddie? We’re almost there. You're doing great.” Buck squeezed her hand and smiled at her, trying to keep her positive.
“Tired.” She mumbled, her eyelids getting heavy.
“Uh, hey, hey, Maddie, I-I know... I know you're tired, but I-I need you to keep your eyes open for me. You-you know the drill.”
“Uh-huh.” She said trying to force them open as best she could as the medic on board tended to her wounds.
“Yeah, just, uh... just like that.” Buck reassured her. “Hey, you, uh... you think you had a hard day. Athena and I have been running all over the state looking for you. I wasn't dressed for snow.”
“Me, either.” She joked and it sent relief through Buck.
“Athena said she'd, uh.. she'd call Bobby, let everyone know that you're okay. They are gonna be... so relieved. Chimney. Chimney most of all.”
“Chimney's alive?” She questioned, her face breaking into relieved tears.
“Oh, my God. Y.. Maddie, no, yeah, Ch-Chimney's alive. He, uh.. He-he made it through.” He paused. “You both did.”
“Uh, Chimney as in Howard Han?” Tommy asked.
“Y-yeah. You know him?” Asked Buck.
“Yeah I know him. Was at the 118 back when he was a probie.”
“No way.” Buck exclaimed. Small world, he thought.
“You said he’s going to be okay?”
“Yeah. Docs said through knife missed any vital organs.” Buck told him.
“Thank God for that.”
**
Maddie was going to be okay. Just like Chim, Doug had missed anything vital when he stabbed her. She’d need quite a few weeks to heal from the physical injuries, and likely many more for the psychological injuries, but she was alive and Buck was grateful for that.
The hospital that she’s been taken to wanted to keep her for a few days for observation which she didn’t want. She wanted to go home and make sure Chimney really was okay.
So after some begging, cajoling and Tommy offering to transport her to the hospital in L.A where Chimney was admitted, the doctors agreed to let her go.
After getting checked in at the second hospital the first thing Maddie did was asked to be taken to chimneys room. Buck followed behind as a nurse wheeled Maddie to his room.
“Are you coming in?” She asked Buck.
He shook his head and gave her a reassuring smile. “No. You-you should have some time alone.” She smiled thankfully and was wheeled inside by the nurse who closed the door on her way back out.
Buck leant against the wall opposite the room, watching them through the window. He smiled seeing them happily embrace one another.
“Your sister okay?”
Buck turned to see Tommy walk up. “Uh, yeah. She’s okay. Relived that Chim is okay.” He pointed to the window.
Tommy looked in to see Maddie sitting on the edge of Chim’s bed, leant forward with her head in his shoulder and him stroking her hair.
“That’s sweet.” He responded.
“Yeah.”
“Are you okay?” He asked Buck, noticing his hands were shaking. The shock and adrenaline from the last 48 was beginning to wear off.
“Y-yeah, I’m.. I’m fi-“ his face crumpled and his breath hitched. A whine came from his throat as tears exploded from his eyes.
“Hey, woah! I got you.” Tommy moved quickly and put an arm around him, guiding him a few feet away from the window to Chimneys room and wrapped his arms around Bucks shoulders.
Buck fell into him almost and held on tight to Tommys flight suit as all of the fear and relief he’d held inside poured out of him.
“It’s ok. You’re okay.” Tommy said softly, running a gentle hand up and down his back.
When Buck came to his senses, an embarrassed heat flushed through him and he let go of Tommy.
“I’m-I’m sorry.” He sniffed and wiped his eyes on his sleeve. “I didn’t mean to..” he blew out a breath and rapidly blinked his eyes in an attempt to dry them out.
“You have nothing to apologise for, uh..” Tommy realised that he didn’t know the man’s name.
“Buckley. Evan, uh.. Evan Buckley.”
“Evan. Tommy Kinard.” He smiled.
Buck felt- he looked at the man before him. He had piercing blue eyes surrounded by warm wrinkles as he smiled, a light dusting of stubble caressed his jaw, dipping into the prominent cleft of his chin. He was incredible handsome. Beautiful, even.
He’d admired good looking men before, even checked out the ass of a few—which was totally normal—But this was.. different. There was a warm feeling in his belly at those eyes and that smile and that cleft.
And definitely that build. Buck wondered what his physique looked like underneath the flight suit.
Was it weird to think that a crying man was beautiful? Tommy couldn’t decide. Evan was definitely gorgeous—that baby face, the cute birthmark and those lips.. Tommy would go to war if those lips asked him to.
But it was the vulnerability that got him. He’d felt a little disappointed when Evan pulled away. He’d wanted to comfort him longer. Which Tommy wasn’t entirely unaware was strange given that up until seconds ago he didn’t know this man’s name.
“It’s just.. she’s all I have, ya know?” Buck told him.
“Your parents not around?”
“Oh they’re around but they- She pretty much raised me herself. She the strongest person I know. But seeing her like that today..” He blew out a breath in an attempt to keep himself together.
“It must have been scary.” Tommy offered and Buck nodded.
Buck all of a sudden felt exposed. He rubbed his face with hai hands trying to clear away the remaining emption.
“Do.. do you have to go back to work?” Buck asked.
“Actually my shift ended an hour ago.”
“Oh. Why are you still here?” Buck realised how that sounded and rushed to correct himself. “I-I mean, you can go home. If you want.”
“I actually can’t fly back to Harbor. I’ve now maxed out my flying hours for the week so I’m officially grounded.” He explained. “I have to stay here until they send another pilot to fly the helo back.”
“How long will that be?”
“Not sure. Our other pilot is on another call right now so could be 1 hour, could be several.” He said. “Besides, I wanted to check on Howie anyway. Although, I think your sister has that covered.” He chuckled.
“Yeah. That’s why I didn’t go in; wanted to give them their moment.”
“Are they dating?” Tommy asked.
“Uh, actually it was their first date that night.”
“Talk about bad luck.”
“Seems my sister is carrying on the Buckley tradition of almost dying on a first date.” Buck joked. Tommy gave him a confused look.
Buck let out a small laugh. “Last year. I, uh.. choked on a piece of bread and my date had to perform an emergency tracheotomy.”
Tommy pushed himself off the wall he was leaning on and stared at Buck. “What?!”
Buck laughed again. “Yeah. I should be clear—they were a dispatcher so not a civilian, and did have medical help over the phone. But yeah, I stopped breathing for a minute.” He pulled down the neck of his hoodie to revealing the pale scar on the base of his throat.
Without even thinking about it Tommy reached up and his finger tips grazed the area. Buck felt his body temperature go up with a flush at the touch.
Tommy suddenly realised what he was doing and pulled his hand back, shifting awkwardly in his stance.
“I thought I’d had some bad dates, but I’ve never almost died.” He said trying to push whatever this feeling was he had back down.
“What was your worst?”
“Huh.” Tommy said thinking about it. “Gotta be between the guy that stole my car the morning after, or the guy that dined and dashed but didn’t tell me until the police showed up at my door the next morning.
So Tommy was into guys. Buck felt.. pleased? Relieved? ..happy? He couldn’t pinpoint the feeling.
“Did you get arrested?”
Tommy shook his head. “Thankfully, no. I knew one of the officers and they knew I wasn’t the type to do that. I still paid the bill though.”
“Really? I wouldn’t have.”
“Yeah, well, I really love Micelli’s and wanted to be able to go back.” He laughed and Buck followed suit.
His laugh was beautiful. And that dimpled smile when he did it made Tommys mouth go dry.
The laugh died down but they continued to look at one another. Buck couldn’t pull his eyes away. Tommys eyes were just so mesmerising that he could willingly get lost in them.
They broke eye contact when Tommy’s phone rang.
“Go for Kinard.. okay great.. I’ll be there in second… bye.” He tucked his phone back into his pocket. “Seems my ride is here and a replacement pilot.”
A flood of disappointment filled Buck that Tommy was leaving.
“Right. I mean, uh, good. I-I bet you’re looking forward to getting home.” Buck said unable suddenly to keep eye contact.
“I’m definitely looking forward to a shower.” He said with a chuckle. “But it was nice meeting you Evan.” He reached out a hand to shake. Buck took it and held on to it a second longer than was normal. He kind of didn’t want to let go.
“Uh.. you too, Tommy.”
“Tell Howie I’ll call him in a few days to check in.” He said beginning to walk away.
“I-I will.”
Tommy wanted to turn back around and.. well, he didn’t know what. He wanted to stay talking to Evan that was for sure. He was gorgeous and sweet and adorable and.. and probably straight. There was no point in deluding himself, he thought, as he pressed the elevator button.
Before Buck knew what he was doing he was running down the corridor to the elevator.
“Wait!” He called out and Tommy turned around.
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah. Uh.. I-I.. I was wondering if, uh.. if you would like to.. to go to.. dinner. With me. Some.. sometime.” Buck let out a relieving breath.
Tommy looked at him for a moment and tilted his head. It made Buck feel weird—like he was naked and exposed.
“Evan, are you asking me out on a date?” Tommy asked, trying his damndest not to give away the excitement he was feeling.
Buck, however, realised what he had done. He’d just run towards Tommy not really thinking about what he was going to say, and oh..
Oh.
It suddenly hit him. The warmth in his belly, the little pin pricks of nerves he was feeling when talking to Tommy, and the definite swooping in his belly when Tommy was looking at him.. he liked Tommy.
“Yeah, I.. I guess so.” He smiled shyly. “But-but if you don’t, uh.. if you don’t want to that’s-“
Tommy stepped forward, tilted Bucks head up by the chin and kissed him.
Buck thought his bones had disappeared. It took all of his strength to not melt into a puddle on the floor at the feel of Tommys soft and warm lips. He pushed back into the kiss for a second before Tommy pulled away.
“Was that okay?” He asked, voice barely above a whisper and looking at Buck with those eyes. Buck was simply fucking mesmerised and all he could do was nod.
Again, Buck moved before his brain could compute what was happened and he shoved his lips back onto Tommy’s. Tommy responded with unexpected hum and a lash of flames soared up through Buck at the sound.
His arm immediately wrapped around Tommys neck to draw him in as he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss.
Tommy didn’t have any brain cells left to resist and wrapped his arms around Bucks waist and opened his mouth to let Bucks tongue in and holy mother of god it was exquisite!
His perfectly plump lips were softer than he could have imagined and moved so wonderfully against his own, with perfect pressure and a delicacy Tommy hadn’t experienced in a kiss before.
A voice echoing out of the hospital tannoy brought Tommy back to his senses and he gently ended the kiss.
“We should probably stop.” He spoke; his voice hoarse and thick with desire. He desperately wanted to kiss Evan again but they weren’t exactly in the best place for that.
He placed a gentle kiss to Buck cheek before stepping back.
Bucks chest was filled with a number of different feelings. Pleasure, excitement, confusion. And a feeling of contentment he hadn’t anticipated. As though a piece of him had slid in to place that he hadn’t realised was missing.
Buck couldn’t take his eyes off Tommys swollen, pinked up lips.
“I really have to go.” Tommy said reluctantly. “Hand me your phone.” Buck unlocked it and passed it over. Tommy put in his phone number before giving it back and pressing the elevator button. The doors immediately opened and he stepped inside, turning to face Buck.
“Text me when and where and I’ll be there.” He said with a smile.
“I-I will.” Buck replied, his own throat struggling to make sound.
“Bye, Evan.” The doors began to use shut.
“Bye.”
Buck was in a total love struck daze as he walked back to Chimneys room.
“Earth to Buck!”
“Huh? What?” His brain finally came back online to see Maddie in her wheelchair in the doorway to Chim’s room.
“I said what’s got you smiling like that?” She asked.
An embarrassed flush tried to take him over by he coughed and pushed it away.
“I’m, uh.. I’m just happy you’re okay. Both of you.” He smiled and followed her back into the room.
**********
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jessicaloons · 2 days ago
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INVISIBLE STRING: FROM THE VAULT
Part 3: A Christmassy story…
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Merry Christmas everyone 🎄🎅🏻♥️
Better late than never! As it is during Christmas, it all gets a little hectic and what I wanted to post last night had to be postponed to today… it’s a little something I started to write a year ago, at Christmas, while watching one of my all time favourite Christmas movies.
And now no more talking, here it is…
Christmas 2027:
"Radiation?" Joris cocked an eyebrow.
"Radiation." I shrugged my shoulders and he chuckled "Don’t ask. It’s- it’s her newest ick…"
"You’re surrounded by radiation the entire day with having your phone with you? So where’s the difference at ni-…"
"That’s exactly the point. Your body is exposed to radiation all day long, so at night, when it resets, there shouldn’t be any radiation!" Lizzie’s voice rang out behind us, making Joris flinch "I’ve read it in various magazines! So it can’t be that wrong!"
I had to chuckle, looking at Joris’ petrified face when Lizzie glared at me, although I could see her eyes getting watery.
"It’s not funny!" her voice strained.
"It’s not, cara mia. You’re right. I’m sorry." I replied.
"I’m not crazy…" she sniffled a little and I felt bad.
"No, you’re not! I know that, okay?" I said immediately and got up from my seat, cupping her cheek and gently stroked the side of her bump "You’re doing everything to protect our babies… so whatever you think is best we’ll do! You’re an amazing mum, okay?"
She only nodded slightly and turned away, her shoulders slumped.
"I lay down for a bit…" she whispered and waddled off, taking a short look into Emmie’s room, before she continued to our bedroom.
"I swear I didn’t want to upset her!" Joris looked at me with big eyes and I sighed, sitting back down.
"Believe me, same. The last 2 or 3 days it’s been tough, she’s more emotional than usually…" I rubbed my temples, leaning back "One moment she’s happy and bubbly, the next moment she cries about how there’s only one apple left and that it might feel alone… and then she’s mad at herself for crying about such ridiculous things which makes her cry even more because she thinks I’m annoyed of her being an emotional mess… which is not true at all. I love it. I swear."
"You’re probably the only guy on earth who loves his pregnant wife’s mood swings." Joris laughed.
"It’s cute… when she’s this bubbly Lizzie, who turns over a jar she can’t open first super frustrated and then grumpy like never seen before and curses it like there’s no tomorrow, just to be sad the next moment that whatever’s in the jar is lost forever…"
"And then you chime in and save the day…" he wiggled with his eyebrows and I held up my hands.
"You know, not all heroes wear capes… but they still get a proper thank you… if you know what I mean…"
"Yeah. No. Gross…"
Right when I wanted to reply I heard the soft steps of Emmie and Arlo approaching and when I turned a little I saw them both walk around the corner.
"Dada? Mummy look sad?" her sweet little voice sounded truly concerned and I opened my arms, hoisting her up into my lap "Why mummy sad?"
"She’s not sad, Emmie. Just a little emotional."
"Emonal?" she repeated and I smiled.
"Emotional…" I said slowly, while she quietly said the word again "That’s when you feel all sorts of emotions… that’s feelings. Sad, happy, tired, funny, moody… and you just don’t know what’s the real feeling. So you get a little overwhelmed with emotions… it’s nothing bad. It happens. Especially when someone carries a baby, or like mummy two, in their belly…"
"Mummy feel for baby one and baby two?" Emmies eyes widened and I had to chuckle.
"Yes, my little princess, that’s exactly what mummy’s feeling. Her feelings and baby one and twos feelings."
"Lot of feelings!"
"Oh yes! A lot of feelings!" I nodded and she sighed, cuddling into my chest "You know what? Why don’t you help me and Joris make some hot chocolate for mummy?"
Emmie’s eyes lit up and she jumped off my lap, already pulling me up on my feet before she grabbed onto Joris hand, doing the same.
"Comes on, Jojo! Hot chotlat for mummy!" she chirped and pulled him with her.
"I’m coming, Emmie-bug." he laughed and picked her up, following me into the kitchen, where he sat her down on the kitchen island.
"Emmie hot chotlat, too!" she looked first at me and then at Joris with her big puppy eyes and I could melt away on the spot.
"Let’s make hot chocolate for us all, okay? And then we can watch a movie before bedtime, how does that sound?"
"No bedtime."
"Emmie, we have to get up early tomorrow! We’re leaving for Christmas!" I reminded her but she shook her head.
"No bedtime." she repeated, crossing her arms in front of her chest.
"No bedtime means no Christmas, and no Christmas means no pops and grams, no granny, no Liam or Elijah… no Arthi!"
"No Arthi?" Emmie whispered and I nodded.
"Also no presents…"
"Emmie like bedtime."
"Yeah?" I asked and she nodded.
"Bedtime comfy. Jojo read story?" she turned and looked at him "Pwease?"
"Of course, Emmie-bug. Every story you want!" he cooed at her and she clapped happily.
"Now chotlat for mummy!"
"Now chocolate for mummy."
"Charles?" Lizzie whispered and I turned a little, trying to make her out in the dark "I’m sorry…"
"What do you mean?" I asked, voice still hoarse from sleeping. I looked around, my eyes trying to adjust to the darkness and saw her perched against the headboard.
"For being over emotional… and unreasonable…" she said and I sat up to switch on the lamp on the night stand.
"Hey, you’re not over emotional or unreasonable!" I replied, rubbing my eyes, facing her.
"I am. The other day I cried because of a pair of socks I had to throw away since one of them had holes…"
"It was a nice pair of socks!"
"Charles…" Lizzie chuckled and I grabbed her hand, kissing her knuckles "I’m serious! I feel like I’m way worse than when I was pregnant with Emmie!"
"Yeah of course! You’re carrying twins, cara mia! Double the trouble!"
"Is that why I could eat all the damn time? I’m always hungry…" she sighed and I laughed, looking at her pouting.
"And what does my pretty girl want right now?"
"Now? Oh… umm… I’m not hungry…" she looked away and I gently grabbed her chin, turning her head.
"Lizzie… I know you… it’s 1 am that’s your time… so, what can I get for you?" I stifled a yawn.
"I’m fine… you’re tired and we’ll be picked up early…" she mumbled but I shook my head.
"Pretty girl…" I scooted closer, cupping her cheek "What do you want? Fruits? Something salty? Ice cream? A burger?"
"Some sour gums and-… it’s weird, because usually I don’t like them… salt and vinegar crisps? Do we have that?"
"On it…" I pecked her lips and shuffled out of the bed, stretching as soon as I stood up "Anything else?"
"Umm… one of these strawberry lemonades maybe?"
"Anything my pretty girl wants." I said, grabbing my sweatpants that got stuck somehow and I pulled harder almost tripping over when I finally freed it.
"Are you okay?" Lizzie looked at me and I nodded.
"It got stuck somehow… I don’t know… get comfy I’ll be right back." I slipped on my pants and left our bedroom, down the hall to the kitchen I stopped at Emmie’s bedroom and took a look inside.
Our little girl tucked in under her blankets, Arlo guarding her, sleeping right in front of her bed. He must’ve felt my presence, lifting his head looking at me. He got up, yawned and then trotted over, tilting his head.
"All good, Arlo. Just me." I whispered, kneeling down "Go watch our little princess." I stroked his fluffy fur, scratched his ears before he stretched “Ohhh big stretch! Good boy." I scratched his ears and got up "Go back to sleep…" he turned around and walked away, plopping down back at his old spot.
I rummaged through the pantry, grabbing everything Lizzie graved and trotted back to our bedroom, where a big smile spread over her face as soon as she saw me walk in.
"I can already taste the lemonade…" she made grabby hands and I laughed, handing her the can of lemonade and the crisps and sour gums.
I climbed in bed next to her, lying down and watching how she happily scrunched up her nose as soon as she ate the first sour gum, closing her eyes savouring the taste.
"Remind me to pack strawberry lemonade, salt and vinegar crisps and sour patch kids…" I yawned.
"I’m so excited for Christmas, our last without the twins… next year we’re already a family of 6…" Lizzie whispered and I cocked an eyebrow.
"6?"
"6…"
"Of course… Arlo…"
"I told you he’s our first born." Lizzie’s happy giggling made me smile and I nodded.
"You’re right. He is. And he’s an amazing big brother, guarding his little sister."
"He’s a good boy." she happily munched and I smiled, yawning again "You can sleep… you don’t have to stay awake with me…"
"Yeah?" I mumbled, fighting to keep my eyes open.
"Yeah…" Lizzie replied and leaned down, kissing my cheek "Thank you…"
"You need anything else?" I asked but she shook her head.
"No. We’re all good now. Sleep, pretty boy."
I didn’t know if I replied or not, I fell asleep almost immediately.
Ring. Ring. Ring.
An annoying ringing inside my head. But was it inside my head? I groaned and turned around, Lizzie next to me fast asleep, the ringing that definitely wasn’t just inside my head didn’t seem to bother her.
"Dada… make it stop…" Emmie rubbed her eyes, stumbling to our bed, her hair her a hot mess "Head owie!"
"I know…" I picked her up and sat her next to Lizzie "I’ll go…" I kissed her cheek and scrambled out of bed, looking for the source of the horrific sound. The door bell. And the landline phone. Both ringing at the same time. Just like my phone "What the hell?" I grabbed my phone and picked up "Hello?"
"Ah, Mr. Leclerc! Finally! I wanted to come up myself and look if everything is alright!" Matthieu, our concierge, said and the landline phone and door bell stopped ringing.
"Of course, everything’s alright? Why wouldn’t it be?" I was confused, looking around.
"There are two cars here to pick you up. They’ve been waiting for a while now and we tried to call you then-…"
"What?! But the cars should be here at 8?" I replied.
"Mr. Leclerc, it’s 8:30 am…"
"WHAT? What? How? I- what?" I checked the time at my phone and cursed "Oh shit… umm tell the drivers we’ll need a moment…"
"Can I send them up to get your bags?" Matthieu asked and I nodded.
"Yes. Everything is packed. All the bags are at the elevator…" I hastily walked back into our bedroom, pushing the buttons to open up the blinds.
"Alright. I’ll tell them." he hung up and I gently shook Lizzie.
"Cara mia? Wake up please… we need to get ready…"
"Hmm?" she mumbled, blinking a few times.
"The cars are already here… we need to get ready." I said again and her eyes shot open.
"What? But you set your alarm? What?" she scrambled up looking at Emmie next to her "Did we oversleep?"
"I don’t know. I didn’t hear the alarm. But that doesn’t matter. We need to get ready. Now. Come on." I pulled her gently off the bed and she sighed "I take care of Emmie, okay?"
"Hmm…" Lizzie mumbled and waddled away to the bathroom, yawning "Did you not set the alarm?"
"I did. I don’t know what happened…" I mumbled and picked up Emmie "Come on girlie, let’s get ready."
"Ready for Crimas!" she clapped her hands and I chuckled.
"Christmas. And no. Not quite yet. We have to get there first."
"To Christ-as?" she tried again.
"Almost, Christmas, with an 'm'… Christ- mas."
"Christ-mas." she repeated and I smiled.
"You got it right, Emmie! Good girl!" I sat her down on her bed and grabbed the clothes Lizzie had put out already "Now let’s get dressed and then we’ll have a little snack in the car, how does that sound?"
"Car?" she tilted her head, scrunching her nose.
"Yeah, we have to drive to the airport. And then we get into the jet to fly to Switzerland. To this big chalet in the mountains where all our family is waiting! To celebrate-…"
"Christmas!" she clapped excitedly and I nodded.
"Exactly! But we’re a little late. So we need to hurry up a little!"
"Houwy up! Houwy up!"
"That we have to! So let’s have a look. You look adorable, now we just need to take care of your hair and-…" I began when I saw Lizzie waddling towards the kitchen, still in her pyjamas "Alright… wait a minute…" I sat her down "You pack your sleep plushies into your backpack and play a little with Arlo, okay? I’ll be right back and make your hair." Emmie nodded and I followed Lizzie into the kitchen, finding her rummaging through the fridge "Lizzie?"
"Why is there no food?" she sniffled, turning around "I’m hungry. But there is nothing to eat. What am I supposed to do now?"
"Cara mia, we have breakfast in the jet, okay? It’s all prepared-…"
"But I’m hungry now!" she was grumpy "The babies and I are hungry now!"
"I understand, but we have nothing here, because we’re leaving now… we can stop at a bakery on the way?" I tried it again and she sighed.
"Okay… I go and take a shower…" she walked past me and I followed her.
"Cara mia, you don’t need to shower. We don’t have time. You can shower as soon as we arrive in the chalet…" I said carefully but she shook her head.
"I smell… I’m not arriving smelly for Christmas…"
"Technically it’s not Christmas yet, so… and also you don’t smell… you just had a bath last night and I can still smell your coconut butter on your skin, so please. Just get dressed and let’s go. The cars are waiting. For over half an hour now…"
"Then why didn’t you set the alarm?" she looked at me annoyed.
"I did! I don’t know why it didn’t went off! Stupid alarm clock…" I walked over to my night stand to find the alarm clock to be off, not plugged into the wall "What the… oh no… my sweatpants… fuck…" I mumbled, remembering the struggle I had at night with my pants "With my phone this wouldn’t have happen…" I groaned more to myself when a half naked Lizzie stepped out of the closet.
"What did you say?" she cocked an eyebrow and I held my hands up "Is it my fault now for protecting our babies? Last night you said I was the best mum because of it!" her bottom lip began to wobble and I hastily pulled her into me.
"And I meant it! Okay? It’s all good. Just-… please get ready. I feel bad for the drivers to wait this long because of me… and the jet and everything…" I whispered against the side of her head, kissing her temple.
"Okay. I’m almost done…" she breathed out "You need to get dressed yourself…"
"On it…"
15 minutes later I strapped Emmie into her seat and gave the driver the all clear to drive, although I had a feeling like we forgot something at home. I was nervously fidgeting with my phone next to Lizzie who happily munched on the croissant I got her from the bakery.
"What is it?" she asked after another minute of me nervously tapping my foot.
"I feel like we forgot something…" I mumbled, going over the list inside my head "I just don’t know what…"
"It can’t be important if you don’t remember it."
"I don’t know…" I looked outside the window, the car approaching the little private airport.
We had all of the bags, there was nothing left when we left the penthouse. I checked Emmie’s backpack and she had packed all her night plushies. Arlo laid on the floor in front of me, his bag with his toys and leashes in the back. Lizzie packer her bag with her books and computer last night herself and it rested now next to her on the seat. The bag with her snacks on the floor next to my feet. I couldn’t grasp what was missing but still I felt like it.
"Charles?" Lizzie grabbed my hand, squeezing it "We’ve got everything. It’s fine, you’ll see…"
"Yeah… I hope so…" I mumbled watching the car in front with our baggage stopping on the tarmac "It’s too late now anyways I guess…" I unbuckled Emmie and got out of the car, taking her with me. I helped Lizzie out of the car and she took Emmie from me, walking with Arlo towards the jet while I helped loading our baggage onto the cart, before I walked up the stairs of the jet myself.
"Welcome on board, Mr. Leclerc." the pilot shook my hand and I smiled.
"Thank you, and sorry for the delay… it got a little hectic this morning…"
"All good, Sir. Why don’t you take a seat and we’re preparing for take off."
"Thank you." I took off my jacket, handing it to the flight attendant who stored it away.
"Can I get you anything to drink?" she smiled and I shook my head, sitting down on front off Lizzie, Emmie next to her on the seat, looking outside the window.
I leaned my head back. Closing my eyes. One last time going over the list in my head. One last time going over every piece of baggage we just unloaded from the car. Lizzie’s suitcases, my suitcases, Emmie’s suitcases, the bags full off her and Arlo’s toys, the bags full of presents. The bag with Lizzie’s snacks and last but not least the 2 suitcases and backpack of…
"JORIS!" I shouted, Lizzie and Emmie both looking at me "WE FORGOT JORIS!" I took my phone out, about to call him when he already did the same.
"Jo-…"
"I can’t believe you forgot me at home…"
"I swear-…"
"Like seriously? What is this? Home alone? Your alarm doesn’t go off and you forget me in all the hectic?"
"I’m so sorry! I send the ca-…"
"Just be glad it’s more like Home Alone 2. I woke up by myself and-…" he hung up "And got in the car right in time… I just wanted to wait how long it would take you to figure out that I wasn’t with you…" Joris walked inside the jet, plopping down in the seat next to us.
"I’m so so sorry!" I looked at him sheepishly and Emmie climbed off her seat, walking over to Joris who picked her up, sitting her down in his lap.
"Jojo made Emmie hair look nice." she smiled and I looked at her, then at him.
"What?" I said and looked at Lizzie "I thought you did that?"
"I thought you did?" she replied and Joris laughed.
"Nope, I did, right Emmie bug?" he cooed at her and she smiled "And now that we’re all here… I say let’s go. Christmas is just right around the corner…"
"Christmas with pesents! Pesents for evyone!" Emmie said excited, clapping her hands "Mewwy Christmas evyone!"
🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄
I hope you enjoyed this (not so) little something and I hope you all had amazing Holidays!
Taglist: (If you don’t like to be tagged for this, let me know)
@itsjustkhaos @eugene-emt-roe @sunny44 @silkenthusiasts @glitterquadricorn @aundercover @kakorrhaphiphobia @alittlebitofbooksandmagic @ru-kru @shimmermotorsport @janeh22 @kahhorri @18754389 @chiliwhore @hellowgoodbye @queensassybitchsworld @harrysdimple05 @skynel09 @fangirlforever2000
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focsle · 1 year ago
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Something about this little note a whaler added in the margins of his journal gets me.
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224 [days out] My book is very damp ink spreads.
Can’t really articulate why but I think it’s something about…the process of reading it now in all its spreading ink, and seeing this little complaint he penned in the moment to explain the ink quality. It‘s a concrete physical link to a little moment in time when this book was new (yet damp) in a fellow’s hands 170 years ago.
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colesabi · 6 months ago
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I just tried to write for an hour and it was honestly painful. I wouldn’t say I’m experiencing writers block… maybe more so, I’m a broken record that just wants to repeat the same words and descriptors and is having a difficult time concentrating and forming coherent and meaningful sentences.
I think out of the 7 or so paragraphs I wrote, maybe 2 or 3 are passable and that’s coming from a brain that is running on fumes at this point so I’m not even sure I’m all that confident in that either.
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medusa-was-innocent · 3 months ago
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Wow this sucks
#I’m literally gonna cry wtf#I’ve been trying to get back into writing so I was going through some old journals and reading the poems I wrote back in 2015#and I left my favorite pages sitting on top of my notebook on my bed and my family’s dog came in while I wasn’t looking and destroyed it all#like they’re completely gone#some of the few pieces of writing from my teenage years that I’m actually proud of and wanted to revisit and it’s completely destroyed#I’ve found 2 scraps and they’ve got about 4 words in total#this was multiple pages full of writing#this is so discouraging I don’t even want to write anything now#like I started taking an online poetry workshop last week trying to push myself out of my comfort zone and maybe possibly move in the#direction of trying to get some of my poems put out there#and I’ve been in a huge writing slump for the last like year#and I was hoping this might get me out of it but now I don’t have any motivation to do it#I just wanna cry#I can’t go back to being a teenager again I can’t rewrite the way I felt back then#and now it’s really gone forever#I’m so sick and im working 3 jobs and I just want to be creative again but I’m tired#and I’m about to get hit by this giant hurricane#I’m really overwhelmed I think this was just the straw that broke the camels back#brb gonna go cry myself to sleep over lost poetry#sorry this is me venting feel free to ignore this#vent post#will probably delete after I’ve gotten more than 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep
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forgotten-daydreamer · 6 months ago
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Took twice the max dose of melatonin before the final revision for tomorrow’s exam, I’m shitting my pants and I genuinely don’t know anything as thoroughly as I should but if I sleep less than 4 hrs before it I just know I’m gonna do even worse somehow
#don’t take twice the max dose of anything btw#genuinely don’t do the shit that I do#i only did it bc I know my limits and haven’t had any other substances in over 24 hrs but don’t ever try it#always talk to your gp before taking any meds and supplements at all#anyway psa aside#I want to revise for two hrs so until 1.30am circa but I genuinely hope I pass out sometime in the next hours and a half#godspeed ig#uni#melatonin#I have super high expectations but I genuinely prepared this exam in like 4 days and my brain has been all over the place#haven’t had the chance (economic too so please please consider sparing a couple of bucks for my ko-fi?) to meet my therapist in 2 weeks#been super suicidal super busy dealing with stuff and people and my family and uni and ah oh how I wish I had a brain able to focus#also the ‘visions of horror’ as I call them have lowkey turned into auditory hallucinations that never stop and it’s… tough#genuinely so tired of everything in general#I’d promised to hang with my uni friends after the exam bc I should be done my midday tops but I know im gonna be super sad and underwhelme#so I hope I can be at home by 4 pm tops with one excuse or the other#I love them all so much but I need a break. also bc I got another exam in less than a fucking week and I still haven’t started studying for#it because it’s objectively easier than tomorrow’s and because when was I supposed to study for it#I spent 3 good days working on a paper that isn’t even mine for a subject I don’t even take#a favor for a friend which turned into 3 more friends asking me if I could help them with theirs#and you know me#I never say no. unfortunately. but also I’m super glad they want my help bc they know I can write at least (one good thing)#but. that’s still -3 days available#then. the demons#wasted so many hours just pacing and biting my nails raw and being pathetic#so yeah. in a little under 15 hrs I want to be in bed again. resting until the 19th when the cycle will begin anew#also math ain’t mathing. my exam is in 12 hrs only now 13.
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salemlunaa · 2 months ago
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SURE TIME IS A CONCEPT, BUT THE CLOCK IS TICKING ◔
what more do some of you want?…
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A lot of you need to fix up. stop doomscrolling and complaining and actually apply knowledge.
Do you wanna know how to be like those people who enter the void/ induce pure consciousness with ease after struggling, some of them not even struggling at all? All those success stories that you idolise, screenshot, like, reblog and envy all have one thing in common:
They wanted it. Bad. You need to want it
Those people saw all this shit that they didn’t deserve happen to them, they saw how other people were born with the lives they want, and they decided enough was enough. They weren’t taking shit from the world anymore, they were tired of living lives that they dread, tired of looking at people’s lives with envy, tired of the way life was going for them and how the world treated them unprovoked. They were tired of dreading waking up another day in their shitty realities. Tired of hating themselves in the morning because of another unproductive night. They were TIRED and you need to be too, that fuelled their want for their new lives and got them where they are now.
I’m not saying you can’t be in my asks or you can’t be in my dms. But at what point is it enough? at what point does it become pathetic? You go in these bloggers asks and dms and question them on shit that 1: has been said multiple times or 2: is common sense. But fine, keep playing dumb, keep indulging in the assumption that it “just doesn’t work for you” keep pretending that your just this innocent little baby who “doesn’t understand why it’s not working🥺” 🙄anyway…. You can sit here in this community for as many years as you like while people get what they want.
And although time is a malleable concept that can be manipulated, the clock is ticking, it’s almost 2025 and some of you are right where you started. I need to ask you to sit with your self, look at 2025,2026,2027 heck even 2028, do you see yourself still here? be honest, do you genuinely see yourself with your dream life? if not you need to change your mindset, and stop asking how, you know how!!
Locking in and changing your mindset isn’t this big character development that lasts weeks, it can take seconds. So you could’ve had everything yesterday, 15 minutes ago, an hour ago, even a fucking minute ago, but you’re still here choosing to scroll and act stupid, inhaling new information each day like you were born yesterday. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED TO DO!!! Are you not tired of the same routine, you get motivated from some posts, you get this high, this amazing feeling like you’re so ready to do it, then you procrastinate and if you do manage to try you “fail” and run back to tumblr for the 100th time. Are you not tired of the same shit?
Again, do yall wanna make it to 2025,2026,2027, even 2028 without all the shit you want? At what point does it become enough information and enough questions asked? I know it feels validating and comforting to complain about your circumstances knowing others can relate, but at what point do you stop aligning with the loser who “can’t do it”? Stop acting like you actually give a shit when you say you’re going to apply and then you come back whining. Start acting like you actually want it.
You’re the only one who can change your life, if you want to still complain sure go ahead. Keep the tumblr “for you page” some company while everyone else is actually applying and getting their dream lives. A lot of you don’t want to hear it but with the way you’re wavering you’re probably going to be here for a few more years.
That doesn’t mean you cant change that, i’m not the one who writes your story, it’s you, again, it’s not hard work to change. Like the art of inducing pure consciousness, nothing is hard, nothing needs effort, so you can change your mindset within the snap of a finger and be good to go. But wavering brings you right back to square one.
the clock is ticking and you are STILL here…. LOCK TF IN!!!
SOME OF YOU HAVEN’T MADE ANY SIGNIFICANT PROGRESS, THAT CHANGES NOW!! ⏳💋
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pellucid-constellations · 1 year ago
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Of Oblivious Minds (2)
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Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Summary: You're positive Azriel is in love with Elain. It seems so obvious. But Cassian is laughing at you and suddenly nothing makes quite so much sense anymore.
Word count: 3k
Warnings: Angst!! More pining and yearning
a/n: Here is part two! I love writing this little series :) There will definitely be more! let me know what you think ♡♡
Part 1, Part 3
~~
Sometimes you hated being a scholar. 
There were plenty of upsides to having such a cushy job, especially when your employer was the high lord himself. You got paid generously, got free access to the best libraries, and never had to pay rent. Millions of fae would kill to have your position. 
But as Cassian punched you in the ribs—for the third time—you found yourself questioning your role within the night court’s inner circle.
“Okay,” you breathed out, hunching over with a hand cradling your side. “Okay, please, Cass. Can we take a break?” 
Unfortunately, Cassian didn’t appreciate quitters. So, your feet were abruptly swept from under you and your back made contact with the floor. With a soft oof, the wind was knocked from your lungs. 
“C’mon, y/n, you’re better than that. I know you are.” 
You responded with a wheeze, blinking into the pale sun. 
This morning had been rough.
You’d been having some trouble sleeping, but that wasn’t necessarily unusual. Being alive for so long meant you had seen quite a few things, so nightmares came and went with the tide. You were going through a rough patch with them at the moment, and the lack of sleep was starting to catch up with you.
“You planning on laying there for the rest of the day?” Cassian asked, his large silhouette coming to block the light. 
You squinted up at him. “Maybe.” 
“Yeah, not happening.” 
You fought back a whine as the Illyrian pulled you up by your shoulders and steadied you. He nodded, giving you a moment to ready yourself back into position, and then bent his knees. Gods, you were going to be so sore later. 
It didn’t take long for you to end up on the floor again, this time on your stomach. Your chin cracked against the padded ring, your teeth snapping together at the impact. The sound made your brain vibrate as you rolled onto your side and held your temple. 
Cassian crouched down to the floor beside you and you could make out his worried brow amidst the shakiness of your vision. 
“What’s going on with you?” He brought his hand up to brush against your already bruising jaw. “We’ve been working on that move for weeks. You had it a few days ago.” 
You breathed through your nose and tried not to groan at the ache rolling through your body. “I think I’m just tired. I haven’t been sleeping very well.” 
At that, Cassian plopped down to a seat, keeping a hand at your elbow as you brought your own body up to mirror his. 
“You want to talk about it?” he questioned. 
“There isn’t much to say. I can’t remember them this time. It’s kind of strange—usually I remember them too much and that’s what makes it worse.” 
Cassian hummed in contemplation. He was always the one you went to the morning after a sleepless night. Cassian would listen as you talked through your nightmares, and you would do the same for him. He was a logical pillar in your life. 
But it was always Azriel you went to in the midst of them. You never talked about what you saw and he never asked. But it was always Azriel in the middle of the night. His shadows were a comfort in the pitch black and he was always quick to wrap his wings around you when it became too hard to breathe. 
You hadn’t gone to him these last few times.
The fact that you couldn’t remember your dreams was an unfortunate factor. Because if you knew what was causing you to wake up in a cold sweat every night, at least then you could talk about it. Or take a moment to rationalize. 
There was no rationalizing when the only thing you had to go off of was fear and hurt. 
“What does Azriel think?” Cassian asked after a small lapse in silence.
“What do you mean?” 
“Well, when you go to his room at night. What does he have to say about you not remembering?” 
You scoffed. And then scoffed again. “What? I don’t know what you’re talking about, I barely do that.” 
Cassian stared at you with a blank expression. “So we’re still doing that then. Got it.” He heaved himself up from the ground and then yanked you up alongside him.
“Still doing what?” you asked, trailing behind him as he reached for his canteen. He didn’t answer you, favoring the long gulps of water he was taking. You waited for him to finish and then asked again. He chose to unwrap his knuckles instead. “Cassian.” 
The man sighed. “Nothing, y/n. It’s just… It wasn’t a secret that you would go to his room after you had a rough night. Why do you think I never dragged you out here those mornings?” You cringed at his words. He shook his head. “There’s nothing wrong with that. Why do you hide it?” 
You didn’t have a good reason—well, you didn’t used to. You’d always sneak out of his room after the sun rose and never bring it up again. And there was never a solid explanation for why you evaded the topic. You knew Azriel would never hold it against you and you weren’t embarrassed for others to know that you sought out comfort in a friend. It just seemed like something you should keep to yourself. 
Now, though—now there was a good reason to wipe your actions from memory. To pretend they never happened and to never repeat them. 
“Cassian, Elain is my friend. Even if I did that in the past—in a friendly way—it would be wrong now.” 
A muscle in Cassian’s jaw twitched. “Right. Have you ever actually talked to Elain about her feelings?” 
“I don’t need to.” You reached down for your own water, ignoring the twinge in your side and the pulsing in your head. “She never stops talking about him. And they’re always together. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were already seeing each other.” 
“Who’s seeing each other?” 
The cool tone of Azriel’s voice washed over you and you whipped around to find him standing at the foot of the training ring, blades in hand. 
A nervous laugh fell from your lips and you fought the urge to slap your hand over your mouth. “Um, no one, just some friends I know.” 
“Who?” he asked again. 
“Oh, you don’t know them. Old friends.” 
The Shadowsinger raised a brow, sending Cassian a fleeting look. “I thought I knew all of your friends.” 
“You don’t. I know way more people than you. Even though you're older than me. Not by that much, though. Have you talked to Elain lately?” Words were spewing from your mouth in the worst combinations. You were never nervous around Azriel. What in the cauldron was wrong with you?
Azriel’s raised brow turned into a furrowed one and he blinked, assessing your face with a scrutinizing gaze. “Do you have a concussion?” He turned the Cassian, expression going from confused to provoked. “Did you give her a concussion?” 
“Honestly, maybe.” 
“I don’t have a concussion,” you rushed out, cutting off Cassian’s admission. “I was just leaving though. I’m tired. You guys can fight each other.” 
There was so much sudden pent-up energy inside of you that you had no intention of sleeping, but just seeing Azriel made you feel like you were intruding on something. Which was absurd. Azriel was your friend and had been your friend for centuries. Just because he loved Elain didn’t mean you had to avoid him. 
But this energy had to come from somewhere, and that somewhere was telling you to avoid him like the Illyrian flu. 
Making a break for it, you freed yourself from the training ring and attempted to skate past Azriel with a quick side smile, but he apparently had other plans. He caught your wrist as you walked past, glancing up at a “preoccupied” Cassian before turning to you with his wing out, giving the illusion of a private conversation. 
“You’re not sleeping well?” he asked, voice low. 
You warped your smile into one that met both sides of your mouth. “I’m okay.” 
Shadows crept over his shoulders and along his ears. His expression shifted and pinched and then returned neutral. “You know you can come to me if you need it.” 
“I’m okay, Az. Really.” 
“Would you tell me if you weren’t?”
Maybe before. 
“I’m a paper pusher, Az. I’m not out in the throes of battle,” you jested, scrunching your nose as you smiled up at him. “Nothing is that serious for me.” 
A lie. Something was that serious—serious enough to keep you up at night for the past week—but you couldn’t figure out what it was. 
“That is not what I asked,” he countered, sliding his hand up from your wrist to turn your chin. “You need to ice your jaw. Cassian shouldn’t be so rough with you.” 
“I’m okay,” you said again, words a pathetic repetition because your heart was beating so fast now and you needed to leave. Something was pulling at your chest and you needed to leave. 
“As you’ve said,” Azriel muttered, his fingers brushing down along the column of your throat. When his eyes flickered up and met your own, something inside of you lost its alignment.
You looked away before the feeling could return. Everything righted itself. You took a wobbly step back. 
“Have a good training session.” 
You turned on your heel and stalked away, feeling equal parts the betrayer and the betrayed. 
~~
“You mean that girl off-continent? The one from a century ago?” 
Cassian hummed. “Yeah, her. What I wouldn’t give for a visit from her.” 
“You’re a pig,” Mor replied, a scoff sharp on her lips.
“She didn’t think so.” 
You were eavesdropping. You didn’t like to, but somehow, in the time you’d spent in the inner circle, you’d picked up the habit. Oops.
Technically, you weren’t really eavesdropping. You had been in the room first. It wasn’t your fault Cassian and Mor decided to speak very loudly with only a few shelves separating you. If they wanted privacy they should have checked the area. 
“Is it that hard for you to get laid? You have to search off-continent?” 
Cassian’s responding laugh was almost defensive. “I’m sure you’d love to know about my sex life.” 
“I really wouldn’t, actually. You brought it up.” Mor paused. You heard her shift on the lounge chair. “I am, however, interested in Azriel’s.” 
“Aren’t we all,” Cassian droned. “Pretty obvious that he doesn't have one at the moment. Hasn’t had one in a while.” 
You felt your neck jolt at the reveal of that information. Azriel always kept his partners discrete, but you’d always known he’d had them. Many of them. You had no idea who they were or where he met them, but you would hear the girls occasionally... smell their perfume on a few rare nights. 
“You think? This whole time?” Mor asked, curiosity raising her voice an octave. 
“Mor, I think the sight of other females makes him want to vomit.” 
The book in your lap was all but obsolete. 
“Don’t be so dramatic.” 
Cassian tsked. “I’m not. He’s told me.” 
“I suppose that’s what having a mate does to a person.” 
Your fingers became abnormally cold, the center of your chest caving slightly.
Azriel had a mate? No, he would have told you.
He would have told you. 
Mor’s sweet voice slammed against your ears, harsh despite its nature. “Do you think he’ll tell her soon?” 
Cassian’s reply had you standing on shaking knees. “Hope so. He’s so in love with her it's suffocating. You should see when—” 
You were out of the room in a wisp, sliding out the small back door. The book you’d been reading was still clutched in your frozen grip and you held it against your chest as breathing became impossible. With a hand pressed to the wall and your head hung low, you sucked in air, greedy for some type of reprieve. 
You were happy for him. You were so, so happy for him. 
Right? 
The book fell from your grip, clattering to the floor. The pages collapsed in on themselves as it fell face down, and you listened to the paper crumple as your throat closed. Both hands now pressed to the cold wall. Why were you freezing? 
This made sense. It made sense. 
Of course Azriel had a mate and of course it was… Elain? 
No, it couldn’t be Elain. Elain was Lucien’s mate. 
Now you were confused as well as consumed. Your body was left aching from training and your mind was in a frenzy and you couldn’t even understand why you were reacting the way you were. 
It was completely plausible that Azriel had a mate and didn’t tell anyone about it. He was a private male who kept his lovers to himself, so of course he would keep his mate to himself as well. But he did tell someone about it. He told Cassian. And Mor knew. 
Your fingernails dug into stone.
Azriel didn’t love you. 
The thought came on so suddenly that you almost looked over your shoulder. It was as if the words had been whispered in your ear by some cruel, vicious wind. 
You had never cared if Azriel loved you before, because you knew that he did love you. Like a sister. You were Azriel’s family and he was yours. 
But as the thought of Azriel having a mate invaded your mind once more, your shaky legs propelled you forward, running from the creased book and the hallway that contained all of the worst things. 
You ran until you couldn't, until your toes hit the edge of the balcony on the far side of the house and the cool air of winter hit your cheeks. You had been so cold inside, but somehow the breeze felt even colder across your skin. 
“Y/n?” 
You gasped, whipping around and gripping the railing as it pressed into your spine. You couldn’t formulate words as Azriel stood before you. His hands raised up to his waist, reaching for you as he took in the way your chest heaved.
“What’s happened? What’s wrong?” he rushed. 
You only shook your head, squeezing your eyes shut. Embarrassment and confusion and a twisted sort of fear coursed through you. You couldn't look at him, afraid you would somehow see the bond connected to his chest—somehow notice things about him you hadn’t before. Maybe another shade of hazel in his eyes or a softness to his lips that you had never looked for. 
As you considered it now, it was obvious that you’d never let yourself look. 
Azriel was never supposed to be yours. 
“Talk to me, angel.” Azriel’s sweet whisper brushed against your skin. He was so close to you. You could feel him, but you refused to look. 
To see how everything had changed. 
“Let me fix it.” 
You heard the rush of wind from his wings as he expanded them outwards, followed closely behind by the whirling of his shadows, and it all clicked then. 
The images came quickly, dissipating just as fast. But they did their job, sending heavy, hot tears past the tight scrunch of your eyelids. 
Azriel with Elain. Azriel with Mor. Azriel with random, faceless women.
Him, in every iteration, with everyone that wasn’t you. 
That’s what had kept you up—the dreams plaguing your every resting moment. And you realized then that nothing had really changed at all. That you’d been in love with Azriel for longer than you’d been in love with anything. 
Your jaw trembled, your body rejecting the anguish that swept through you. Wind softly flowed from the west, swaying your skirts with a gentleness that made your breath shudder. That kind of gentleness was impossible. The world felt so cruel. 
“Y/n, tell me what happened. Should I get someone else?” Azriel pleaded. “Should I get Rhys?” 
Rhys could knock you out, and that would surely be a relief. You felt paralyzed by this overwhelming array of devastation. But Rhys would also have access to your thoughts. 
You shook your head. “No,” you said, but the word was lost in the wind. Azriel seemed to hear it anyway. “No, I want—I need to—go to sleep.” 
“You need to go to sleep?” He touched you now, something he seemed to have been avoiding. His hands came to rest behind your neck, thumbs at your jaw, and you pried your eyes open at the contact. You’d never seen the shadowsinger look so ruined, his hair askew, his eyes wild and panicked. “That doesn’t make any sense.” 
His expression was beseeching you for something you couldn’t give him. You hiccuped your next words out. 
“I’m—’m tired.” 
You wished you’d stayed oblivious. That you had never become privy to the depth of your feelings. 
This pain was immeasurable.
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st44rgirlxo · 4 months ago
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Even pro heros like Dynamight forget important dates.
"hey babe don't forget our reservation tonight!"
"yeah yeah ok got to go" on the phone, katsuki rushes out the door to get to work.
you were really looking forward to this date tonight. It feels like its been forever since you and katsuki have spent actual quality time together. he comes home from work really late so by the time he's home you end up falling asleep waiting for him.
7:00pm comes around and you're finished getting ready. You're wearing a long black bodycon dress with matching black heels.
The restaurant was a 5 star restaurant and had very good reviews. You were excited to post pictures of you and katsuki looking cute.
You grab your purse and car keys and get in your car. Before you leave you shoot katsuki a quick text letting him know your leaving.
"hii kats im abt to leave. are you there?"
Once you arrive you park your car keeping an eye out for katsukis car.
you check your phone for any texts from katsuki
none
you text him again to let him know you arrived
“hey im here are you?”
you go in anyway, making sure you were in time for your reservation.
you get seated and you pull out your phone to call katsuki
the call goes to voicemail.
“fuck”
30 minutes go by and it’s completely dark outside your annoyed, stressed and just want to go home.
“ma’am will you be ordering anything” the waitress pulls out her writing pad
“uh yeah i guess so, but can i get it to go”
the waitress takes your order and eventually it comes to your table.
you take the takeout box and leave the restaurant. as you get in your car, you sigh and lay your head back
how could katsuki forget? this was literally the only date you’ve planned in a while and he forgot!?
as your pull up in your driveway you don’t see katsukis car
“what the hell, where is he”
you get inside and take off your heels
your tired of katsuki always forgetting this always happens
why does he do this?
you sit down at the kitchen table opening your takeout as you start to eat you hear katsukis car pull up.
the front door opens as katsuki walks in.
you don’t even look at him.
“hey babe”
you say nothing
“hey you good”
“where were you katsuki”
“I went out with the guys from some drinks after work”
he sees your dress and the takeout
“wait was our date tonight??”
“yes katsuki i told you this morning, but clearly work and your friends are more important”
you didn’t even have the energy to be mad
“do you know how much I was looking forward to spending quality time with my boyfriend? You never have time for me but you don’t think twice when you get asked to do something else”
tears were pouring down you face as your spoke softy but firmly
katsuki hated seeing you cry but he hated himself most for making you cry
“y/n I’m sorry”
“no katsuki, im tired of being 2 or even 3rd in line. do you know how draining that is?”
you turn around leaving katsuki alone with his thoughts
he fucked up
request r openn🔥🔥
923 notes · View notes
ambrosiagoldfish · 8 months ago
Note
Adam x third spouse part 3 I’m begging pookie ❤️
like a time skip to when Charlie appeared and proposed the idea
Benifit of the doubt Pt.4
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Adam x 3rd Spouse! Reader
Warnings: General Adam TW’s, a little bit sad for a moment but it’s ok. Gn! Reader! honestly that’s about it I think?? Wow this is the first time it’s been this short in this series.
Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.
Request Box: Open
Word Count: 4617~
A/n: So… it’s been almost 2 months… whoops. In all seriousness though I’m sorry it’s been so long. I’ve just not been in the mood to write and a lot of stuff has been happening (which is finally over) and I’m glad I could finally post this. I was also, if I’m honest, nervous to post this, cause I’m not sure if everyone’s ready for the direction of the story. But I have made it clear that I wanted to do a time skip to the show at somepoint and decided to do it now! If you enjoy this, please let me know cause I’m really nervous about (Not my words of affirmation love language coming out-) ALSO to the requester, I know you said part 3, but I used it for part 4. I got your request as I was making part 3 soooo my bad. Hope you don’t mind tho <3 this will be the last part before the angsty finale (and maybe an epilogue)
Reblogs are always appreciated!
Anyways this was NOT beta read unfortunately, I tried to get as many errors out during the writing process so hopefully it’s fine. Also, there’s probably some words I might have wanted to italicize or make bold that aren’t, but I’m too tired to care honestly.
Tags: @tired-of-life-86 @nervoussystemss @qopia @lovelyemily @hcneyiced @v3r41ynn @ghostdoodlen @nxptvne-13 @ximenavc-che @edgyfluff @ericityyy @diffidentphantom @faimmm @slasher-whore69 @1-randomized @ozzersauce @fanlovedlt @alientee (if I forgot someone or you want to be added just tell me !!)
Days turned to weeks, to months, to years. Until eventually an eon had passed. An entirety filled to the brim with an indescribable happiness and love, threatening to spill over at any given moment. You loved Adam and Adam loved you.
To say it was all happiness would be a lie, there were some moments of sadness and pain, but all relationships were like that, even ones that lasted for eternity. You both always bounced back, apologize and moved on with a stronger bond than before. And you loved every second of it.
A lot has changed in these last few eons. Adam formed a band and is now the most popular guitarist in all of heaven. You both made new friends, some got into heaven while others were made there. Emily was one of these people to you, she looked up to you for being older than her. You’ve existed for almost all of human existence so, of course she’d look up to you.
Adam had also made new friends, his band members, some officials in heaven, but someone he’s grown close to recently was Lute. You're really happy about his friendship with Lute. She seems like a strong and loyal friend, someone that can keep him grounded while still encouraging him to be more himself. Overall, you really liked her.
How they became friends though is something… less tasteful for you. All the way back when Heaven and Hell had their first meeting on what to do with the surplus of sinners in hell causing an uprising. Neither side came to an agreement in the end, you do feel partially to blame for that, but you still stand by what you did.
You never returned to any of the follow up meetings
But Adam did, surprisingly to you. In the end, you were called to talk with Sera and Adam. You were told of the agreement between Heaven and Hell, about the yearly “cleanse” that Adam and his “Exorcists” would have to commit. At first you were shocked, sure, you didn’t have the best experience with sinners and especially with the rulers of hell, but was death really necessary? You didn’t know what to say, and Adam clearly saw this.
“Babe, you alright?” He puts his hand on your shoulder rubbing his thumb in circles. You place your hand on his.
“Yeah it’s just a lot to take in. Are we sure it has to be done… that way?”
Sera looked down in pain “they’re… uprising and are becoming to much of a threat to heaven.”
You sighed as Adam took you in his arms. Adam was fully aware that you don’t share the same sentiment towards sinners as he does. His hatred towards the unholy souls down in hell was brought about by events that you simply cannot understand. Which he is thankful for, he never would want you to experience what he did.
“If there isn’t anything else we can do then… I guess we have no choice. But I don’t want to… kill anyone, even if they are sinners.”
Adam holds you closer “You won’t have to,” you smile at him, the now familiar flickering of his LED mask meeting your gaze before softly frown “you ok?”
You nod, “yeah, just…I wish there was another way.”
-
That was it. Adam would take his exorcists down to hell to kill as many sinners as they could each year. Adam knew you didn’t want him to talk about it , he kept it as separate as he could from your life. You did have to attend meetings regarding it, as one of the very few people to know about it, that was your duty.
You were fine with having that part of the job. You weren't sure if you could kill someone, sinner or not. So, for the countless years to follow, you played your part with every new extermination, attending meetings to deal with the repercussions of each cleanse.
Adam would also have to attend the occasional meeting. Which is exactly what today was. Sera had called you both in to talk.
“Thank you both for coming. I have to inform you that you will be attending a meeting tomorrow.”
Adam groaned “What! Again? This is like the 4th fuckin’ one this week! Ugh fine! Where is it this time? halo city? Cherub towne” Adam’s voice mocked the locations you’ve both been sent to countless times with a high pitched voice. Even you have to admit that the meetings could drag a bit.
Sera's face turned into a slight grimace as she looks away from you both, she sighs and continues “The meeting will be in… hell.”
“What!” Both your voices raise in shock
“Sera, you know I don’t want to go down there again!”
“Why can’t you just send the other fucking dipshits who know about-“ Adam crossed his arms defiantly
“Stop,” Sera raises her hand toward you both “no one wants to go there, and I know you both especially don’t.” She pauses “But you both are the only available angels who know of the cleanse that aren't busy. Please… I understand your disdain but heaven’s business comes first.”
“Who are we even gonna be talking to -Wait a damn minute- Don’t fucking tell me we have to talk to him.”
“I'm sorry…” You all sat in silence for a moment before Sera begins to speak again, “But you both won’t have to worry about physically being there, we have prepared holograms for you, so neither of you would be in any danger.”
“I'll have an Angel escort you to the ‘meeting’ room tomorrow, please, get some rest. I’m sure you both have had a long day.”
With that, you and Adam went home, you were definitely not feeling well about the meeting, but the fact you wouldn’t actually be there calms your nerves a bit. You had to be a little honest with yourself, hell wasn’t really the issue for you, it was more so the people. Lucifer for one, that made you feel uneasy.
The next morning, you and Adam got ready, you had to motivate him a little. He was clearly not excited for this meeting like you. The entire way there he held you close, even though nothing could have hurt you it made him feel better knowing how close you were.
On the way there, you also got Adam some ribs, his favorite. You thought it would help his nerves a bit. Turns out, Lute was the one Sera assigned to escort you both there. That also made you both a little calmer knowing a mutual friend would be there.
The three of you waited in the ‘meeting’ room for a while, about an hour. At first you thought the meeting might had been canceled or moved and you just weren't told. But then, Lute walked up to you both.
“Sir! The Seraphim has told me to inform you that there’s been a change in plans!”
“What? The fucks that mean?” Adam said stuffing a rib into his LED mouth
“Lucifer won’t be attending the meeting, instead… his Daughter will be here in his stead.” Lute’s mask showed a continuous frown and stern expression as she spoke.
“Daughter?” Your voice shook a little. This was news to you, as long as you’ve existed you had never heard he had a daughter while in hell. You look over to Adam to see His LED eyes were wide in shock but his mask turned into a smile as he sighed.
“Phew boy, we sure dodged a big ass bullet, huh Sweetcheeks?” He laughed as his arm pulled you closer. The whole thing caused you to join in. Suddenly your nerves felt a lot better than before.
“When should she be arriving, Lute?”
“Within the hour.”
-
Adam scarfed down another plate of ribs as you all wait for the “princess of hell” to arrive. The entire time you just had to wonder what kind of person she’d be. The daughter of Lucifer and Lilith. The more you thought about it, the more bizarre it seemed.
But suddenly your thoughts were interrupted by the sliding doors opening to the meeting room and a girl steps in, asking if anyone is there.
“She can’t see us?”
“Yeah, Sera gave me a long ass lector on how this stuff works before we got here. Let’s see here…” Adam pushes a button causing a click to sound out as he says “Sup!”
The girl jumps back and falls to the floor, shocked by Adam’s sudden appearance in the room. She introduces herself as Charlie. Adam offers her to shake his hand, only for it to go through.
“Ha! I fuckin’ got you! Did you fucking see that? Good shit.”
You let out a slight laugh, as you sit and watch the meeting happen. Well, you say “meeting” but nothing about it seemed very professional. Adam for the last hour (you honestly wasn’t sure at this point) had been talking about the most random of things.
You or Lute occasionally shakening your head yes or no while listening to him, while Charlie seemed quite tired already. Not that you could blame her, people who weren’t used to Adam’s banter definitely weren’t cut out for it. But You love every word that comes out of his mouth.
Eventually Adam decides that it’s time to get into what you all came here for. Pulling out a bunch of papers, Charlie begins explaining her solution to hell’s overpopulation. You were only really half listening at first, at least before she mentioned that her solution could stop the extermination which peaked your interest.
She explains her “Hazbin Hotel” and its purpose to rehabilitate sinners, you wanted to hear more of it but Adam cut her off.
The meeting didn’t really go that well, At least for Charlie. But the whole thing left quite the impression on you. The idea of ending the extermination was stuck in your head for so long, and now you had someone who had an alternative.
“Adam, are you sure that it couldn’t have worked?”
Adam looks at you in surprise “What? Do you think that shitshow could have actually worked?” He laughed as he placed a hand on your back. “Don’t even pay it any mind, alright Babe?”
“I know, it’s just… you know I don't like the extermination. So another way to lessen the population of hell should at least be looked into.” Your voice was soft enough to barely hear.
Adam’s gaze softened but he didn’t say another word, only wrapping his wing around you pulling you closer. You lean towards him, snuggling into his soft robe. No matter how much you wanted to ignore it, you couldn’t. You needed to do something, anything.
So that night, after Adam fell asleep, you asked to talk with Sera. Leaving a note for Adam saying you went to buy something just in case he woke up.
“What is troubling you?” Sera’s voice was clear and concise.
You looked toward the ground, your nerves feeling tighter than ever, as you struggled with how to put your words together. “You're aware of all that happened in the meeting with Lucifer’s Daughter, right?”
Sera nods her head “of course, all meetings are documented about as they happen.” She tilts her head slightly “What about it?”
“Well!” You steel yourself before continuing “I would like permission to observe Charlie Morningstar’s ‘Hazbin Hotel’”
Sera’s eyes widen, breaking her calm demeanor before giving a firm “No”
“But-“
“It’s too dangerous for you to be there, Adam wouldn’t want that anyways”
“He would listen if it was an order from you!” Your eyes felt watery but you continued “Please Sera… I know you don’t want the extermination to continue. Just let me do this!”
Sera looked away from you, her feelings evident on her face, any mask now down. ‘Just a little more’ you thought
“Sera, I promise you, I’ll be careful! We don’t even have to fully support them yet, just let me observe them. It would be devastating if so many souls parish if we failed to seek all options!” You beg
Sera sighed, shakingly “…I’ll see what I can do.”
Your eyes gleamed up at the tall woman “Sera, thank you, thank you!” You wanted to hug her but out of courtesy, you advised against it.
Sera tells you that she can’t guarantee anything but she will try as she sends you home to rest.
-
A few days past after that and you haven’t heard anything from Sera. It was a little worrying and felt like a bad sign to you. That was, until you were informed by Sera that your request was accepted!
“But.” Sera stops you before you can celebrate “You're only there to keep track of the progress and to make sure nothing is happening under our noses” You nod your head in understanding
“Also…” she pauses “If anything involving this hotel happens, you will have to take full responsibility, understood?”
You nod again “yes I understand. Have you… told Adam yet?”
She shakes her head
“Ok… can you… not tell him it was my idea, please. I don’t think he’d agree if he knew.”
Sera sighs before nodding her head “Very well, I’ll tell him after you leave”
“Thank you.”
-
You return home, when you got back Adam was already gone, Sera must have already called him to the office. You dreaded when he got back. You didn’t want to see him upset, it hurt you to know how worried he was for you.
A few hours later, Adam comes through the door in a panic. He stomps up to you and pulls you into a warm and intense embrace.
“Don’t go down there. I need you here with me” his voice hitches as his wings wrap around you both, curling you both into a warm and feathery ball.
“Adam…” you paused, was this really the best thing to do? No, It had to be. If this goes well, not only will the extermination stop but Adam wouldn’t have to go down to hell ever again.
“Adam, you know I can’t go against Sera’s orders.” You kiss his cheek “and I won’t be gone forever, I’m only supposed to be there till the next cleanse. Not to mention, I’ll always come back to see you.”
Adam grumbled a little “I know, I just… don’t like you being in the same place that bastard is, and in his brat’s stupid hotel! ”
You laugh softly “Adam…” grabbing his hand, you put yours in it, showing off the gold ring on your finger “I’ll never forget my promise. You know that, right?”
Adam looks at the ring, the gold wrapped around your finger with a perfectly snug fit. Everytime he looked at it was just a reminder of your love for him. That promise was something he could never forget. He slowly raises your hand to his LED mask, kissing the back of it. “Of course not.”
“Good. I promise I’ll be fine, ok?”
He nods. Hand in hand, you slowly lead you both to the bed. The both of you lay next to each other, your bodies linked together like knots. You slwoly remove his helmet from his head, laying it on the nightstand.
Your hands move up his body before landing on his face, cupping his cheeks before pulling him to a kiss before snuggling into his chest.
-
Finally it was Time for you to leave. Sera allowed you to create portals back to heaven in case anything happened and you were in need of assistance. Adam walked you to the front gate.
“Ok, do you have everything? You didn’t forget that fucking angelic dagger I had Lute get for you right-“
You shush him “Adam, I told you I’ll be fine!”
He’s sighs “Damn it- I know that but just make sure to text me while your there ok-
You kiss him deeply “Adam. I know, you’ve told me a hundred times.” You smile as you cup his face “I love you”
He sighs “Love you too Sweetcheeks”
With one final kiss, you give Adam a tight hug before waving goodbye as you went through the flaming portal. As you went through, you take a second to look at your surroundings. In front of you was a tall building. You take a few steps back to see LED lights of a sign flashing the words ‘Hazbin Hotel’
You let out a sigh of relief. You had been a tad bit worried you’d spawn somewhere random and you’d have to find the building yourself. But it seems heaven at least spared you of that.
The red skies of hell were quite different from the pristine blue ones of heaven. Even though you just got here, you could already hear the sounds of screams and explosions in the distance. How welcoming.
You steel yourself and with three hard knocks to the door, you wait for someone to open it. Muffled Scurrying sounds of footsteps approach the door before it creaks open revealing the young blond woman in the doorframe, Charlie Morningstar.
“Hi! I’m-“
The door is slammed shut, Before opening again
“Be not afraid-“
It shuts again…
Well, this may be a bit harder than you initially anticipated. You go to knock again only for it to open once more. This time, the door doesn’t close again, instead the girl mutters a quick “Hi” before going quiet.
“Hello! I didn’t mean to scare you!” You give a small laugh before continuing “I believe we met a couple days ago?” You bring your hand towards her for a shake, to which she reciprocates.
“During the meeting with.. Adam? Right?” She grimaced when she mentioned Adam, which you decided to ignore, you simply smiled and nodded. ”but I don’t believe I caught your name?”
You tell her about yourself, about how your there to stay and monitor any progress the hotel may have. You made sure to pronounce ‘may.’ While you were hoping for this idea to show some kind of positive results, even you weren’t sure if it’d would work.
“Charlie? who’s at the door- WhatHolyShit-“ a woman with a red X over her eye suddenly shouts in surprise. You look over at her, She looked very familiar…
“Wait, you are-“
“Vaggie! Charlie’s sinner girlfriend! And you are?!” The woman known as Vaggie, highlighted the word sinner while performing a “be quiet” gesture with her hand. Your eyes widen a little at the ex-Angel in front of you but you simply smile a nod “I’m Y/n, I don’t believe we’ve met, yes?”
Look, lying is the last thing you’d want to do as a citizen of heaven but you figured that it would be fine if it was to protect someone. Vaggie nodded, her face scrunched up in a tense look.
“You feeling ok Vaggie? You’re looking a little… red?”
“I’m fine! *ahem*, Hun, how about you give them a tour of the hotel.”
Charlie gasped “Yes that's perfect, you may as well get acquainted with everyone if you’re going to be here more often!”
Charlie ran off, telling you “this way! This way!” Over and over. Before you went to follow her, you leaned toward Vaggie and said a quick “Relax, I won’t tell anyone.”
She lets out a sigh before muttering “Thank you”
You both follow Charlie as she shows you the various rooms in the hotel before leading you back to the hotel’s lobby and lounge area.
“Hey! Hello everyone!” Charlie’s voice picked up a little “I’d like to introduce you to our uh… new staff member?” You nod in agreement with the title. The room in front of you was shrouded in looks of both horror and amazement.
“What the hell’s an angel doin’ here?” A lanky spider demon spoke up first
“It’sss an ambush! seek Cover!!” The Snake demon shouted, seemingly grabbing an army helmet from thin air before taking a deep dive behind the couch.
“No Pentious-” She sighs “they’re here to monitor the hotel! Heaven sent them to scout any potential progress the hotel will have”
“It’s nice to meet you all” you look at the people in front of you, to say it was a colorful cast would be an understatement.
“These two are our current tenants of the hotel! Angel dust and Sir Pentious!”
The snake slithered slowly from behind the couch up to you, while the Spider demon remained rested on the couch
“Oh… *ahem* Excuse me dear! I am Sir. Pentious! Formally known as ‘the Architect of destruction’!” He laughs, a slight hiss sounding in his voice.
He offers a handshake which you accept. To which you immediately regret. ‘ Slimey’ you thought, before wiping your, now wet hand on your clothes.
The spider demon, who you now know as Angel Dust, just gives a wave with one of his 4 arms.
“And-“ Charlie extends the word as she quickly walk to a bar by the entrance “this is the recreational area, run by our Bartender, Husk!”
The winged bartender seemed entirely uninterested in your presence or even Charlie’s. The most you got was a small glance before he takes a swig of his alcohol and walks off.
“He’s not the most… social guy in hell” she awkwardly laughs before moving on to the next person. “And this is Nifty, our one and only maid at the hotel! Nifty say hi.”
The short woman scurried moved around you, her eye quickly looking at every every nook and cranny of you as she moved. She made numerous attempts to touch and grab various things on you, your clothes, wings, and eventually she tried to climb up you to get to your halo. That’s when you finally grabbed her in place “you're a… fast one, huh? Nice to meet you!”
“And last but not least! This is Alastor, the hotel’s executive producer and our first -and only- overlord sponsor!”
Immediately, you could tell there was something off about Alastor. The entire aura he gave off was as if he was restraining something completely and utterly ungodly. The static that surrounded him was just one of many whispers you could hear from his soul.
“Hello! It’s quite a pleasure to meet someone of your… holy status!” He offers a hand to which you, hesitantly, shake. “And what do we owe the pleasure for your service?”
“They’re going to be here to keep track of the progress of the hotel…” Charlie paused “you know I’m starting to sound like a broken record- here, it’s late, how about we all get some sleep and we can talk about it in the morning!”
“Fine by me, I am waaay too sober to be having social interaction this late” Angel picks himself up and stretches “I’m gonna hit the hay”
“Here I’ll show you to your room!” Charlie smiles “We -obviously- didn’t have time to make your own so I hope you don’t mind using one of the guest rooms” she laughs
She and Vaggie walks you to your new room before leaving you be, The room was nothing more than just your average hotel room. Of course it did have its differences, a multitude of… eyes seem to be on the wall, staring at you. Well, that’s not the least alarming.
You place your stuff down and begin unpacking, you mostly just brought the basics. Clothes, hygiene stuff, your phone, and, most importantly, a framed photo of Adam.
You sat the photo on your nightstand, angling it just right so that it would always be visible to you. As you do so, you think about the memory the photo brings, you took it on one of the first dates you went on with Adam. It was a relatively tame date, you and Adam, having a picnic by a lake at night. You brought candles so you both weren’t completely in the dark, and you just loved the way he looked, his golden eyes watching the water. The dim candle light illuminating his face with a warm golden shade. Adam hates photos of him with his mask off but… You just had to keep that moment in time forever.
*Ding* *Ding* *Ding*
Speak of the- well, you know the rest. The bright light from the phone comes with the notification sound displaying Adam in bold letters. You smile as you read his messages.
Dixkmaster69
Heyy Sweetcheeks, it’s been a bit since you left
You there??
Fucking answer
You let out a small laugh at Adam’s barrage of messages. He’s not used to you being away from him for more than a day, huh? Not that you could blame him, this is honestly nothing compared to how you feel each year he has to do the extermination.
Sweetcheeks
Hey love
Everything’s fine, I’m ok.
Aside from not having you with me :’(
Dixkmaster69
Fucking finally
You know you don’t have to do this
If I bitch enough to Sera I can get you back by tomorrow
Sweetcheeks
Please don’t, Sera already has enough on her plate.
I promise I’m going to be fine
I’ll be back before you know it.
Dixkmaster69
I know
This shit just worries me
Gonna miss hearing your sexy ass voice at night too ;)
You blush at the message before sighing. Whenever you or Adam approached a topic that made him uncomfortable, he would always try to change the subject to something that made him feel better. You knew why, Adam’s someone who rarely talked about his feelings, even after all these eons together that was something he hadn’t changed. You knew exactly what he needed, even if he didn’t explicitly tell you.
Sweetcheeks
I already miss yours too <3
Do you want to help me fall asleep with that heavenly voice of yours on the phone?
Dixkmaster69
Whatever you want Sweetcheeks <3
You smile when, almost immediately, Adam begins calling your phone. You click the lights off before You make your way in your new bed, not even bothering to change out of the clothes you’ve been wearing. You grab the cover and pull it over you and tapping the answer button.
“Sup”
You yawn “Hey handsome, I missed your voice”
You hear his voice hitch before he caused on “Of course you did, no one has a better voice than the dick master. But uh, yours is a close second”
You’re let out a tired giggle, “such a charmer, you. How’s your day been huh?”
“Oh! don’t even get me started on that- Lute took me to get some ribs to ‘calm my nerves’ or some shit and they had me, ME, wait in line for like 15 minutes! The fucking audacity!”
You smile to yourself as Adam tells you about his day, the sound of his voice was like a sweet lullaby to your ears and you couldn’t get enough of it. But eventually…
“And then when I got home, I couldn’t find my damn charger and it took me like 40 fuckin’ minutes to realize it was under our bed, do you have any idea of how it keeps getting there?” He waits for you to respond only to be met with silence. “Uh bitch, I’m talking to you.”
More silence… well no, actually if Adam focused on listening, he could hear the faint sound of your snoring from the phone. Adam sighs,”Long day, huh?”
Adam lays back in your shared bed, getting comfortable. He sets the phone beside him, plugging it in while keeping it on speaker. He yawns, “Goodnight Sweetheart, can’t wait to see you again”
Slowly, the soft sounds of both yours and Adam’s snores filled each others rooms, a distant, but intimate connection. Even in slumber, you couldn’t stop thinking of your handsome and caring soulmate.
1K notes · View notes
jj-one · 9 months ago
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STRAY KIDS + WHEN YOU’RE BUSY AND THEY CRAVE YOUR ATTENTION !
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this is smut, do not interact if under 18
pairing: skz x f!reader genre/tags: smut, fluff, nipple play, fingering, exhibitionism, voyeurism, marking, sexting, sending nudes, piv, unprotected sex (don't be silly, wrap ur willy), masturbation, oral (f receiving), dry humping, pussy slapping, multiple orgasms, spanking, there is probably more but i’m too lazy to write them all words: 4.4k
[note] if you remember seeing this before yes i’m the original author i didn’t plagiarize lol, i made a new blog and was formerly known as @milkychae but deleted a while ago. i’ll be reposting all my old deleted fics and using this as an archive !
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BANG CHAN. It was finals week, aka your personal hell. You were always super nervous about tests and if you didn’t score over an 80% that may as well be a failure to you. You sighed as you opened yet another textbook to read, your dickhead professor thought it would be a good idea to pile more homework on top of the fact knowing you all needed to study. Your major was biochemical engineering so you shouldn’t have been too shocked by all this intense workload. As you were sitting on the bed you heard a noise come from the door, looking to the left of you to see Chan coming inside. You don’t really put much thought into it though since you see him literally everyday and you were just really focused on studying right now. That’s when Chan starts to come up behind you, rubbing your shoulders and planting a kiss to your cheek.
“Hiii y/n, I’m back!” He says cheerfully, “I couldn’t wait to see you baby,” he proceeds to try and pry the textbook out of your hands so you can give him your full, undivided attention but you pull it back.
“Sorry babe but I really, really need to study right now.” You tell him with an exhausted look on your face. You’ve been studying for only 2 and a half hours but it feels like the entire day.
Chan looks at you and puts his arm around you, “You look so tired sweetie, why don’t you let me give you a massage?” He asks, already starting by wrapping his hands back on your shoulders.
You loved this man dearly, he just came back home from an 8 hour shift at work but is still offering to give you massages and help you out when you’re stressed. You want to tell him no and that you seriously need to focus back on studying but the intrusive thoughts were slowly winning. Ultimately you gave in to Chan’s desires and he gave you a gentle massage. The massage started off pure at first with no intention of going any further but then his hands slipped a little too far and came in contact with your nipple. He noticed you weren’t wearing a bra underneath so he slips his hand through the opening of your t-shirt, light moans were now leaving your mouth from his touch.
“I’ve been thinking about fucking you all day babe,” Chan softly whispers while pinching your nipples, bringing his other hand down to your thigh and gently caressing it. Chan has always been good at being a distraction for you and his cock is definitely what you need instead of reading about the Principles and Techniques of Molecular Physics.
LEE KNOW. Saturday nights were the best, you had no work and got to do whatever you wanted for the whole day. You weren’t much of an outgoing kind of person so you chose to stay in and have your boyfriend Minho come over and be lazy with you. You were wrapped up in your cozy sherpa blanket watching your favorite kdrama season finale, you and Minho both loved kdramas but you got way too into them. Your eyes have been glued to the show since Minho got there and you only spoke about three sentences to him. He’s sitting on the couch next to you and he’s not as remotely interested in the show as you are, he keeps looking around the room and sneaking glances at you from time to time.
He can’t stop noticing how cute you look today, you were wearing very light makeup and had messy hair. He thought you looked so adorable in your current state, just in awe of your natural beauty. He wraps his arm tightly around you and tries to give you a kiss, but you quickly pull away from him so you can focus back on the TV, not trying to miss anything. Minho gets visibly upset by this, he wants to give you his affection yet you’re currently denying it. He tries one more time to kiss you but you continue to keep pulling away to watch the show. That’s when he decides he’s had enough and grabs the remote to turn off the TV, causing you to get frustrated with him.
“What the hell Minho?!” You say in confusion, you were getting so close to knowing who the girl’s father finally was.
He doesn’t say anything, instead he just starts roughly kissing you, pushing you down on the couch and hovering over your body. He pulls away leaving you breathless, then proceeds to nibble on your earlobe, dragging his tongue further down to lightly suck on your neck, touching a certain spot that makes you inhale sharply. He brings one of his hands to your stomach, rubbing it gently. Beginning to toy with the hem of your sweatpants and wants nothing more than for them to be off.
He was almost going to give in to that idea but a new one came to mind, an even more sinister thought. He grins as he continues rubbing down your thigh, you want him to wipe that smirk off his face so badly because you have no idea what he’s up to. Wondering what he could possibly be thinking about right now. Minho brings his fingers to your clothed heat, sliding them inside the sweatpants and starts rubbing your clit through your panties. You moan for him as you close your eyes, feeling the friction. You buck your hips in the air so you can feel more of him, but Minho grips your hips and holds them firmly in place.
“No, stop. No moving ‘til I say so,” Minho says sternly, giving your clothed pussy a little slap as he looks at you. “Since you’re so willing to ignore me, I get to tell you what to do from now on.”
CHANGBIN. You’ve been cleaning the entire house preparing for your parents to come over for dinner. You wanted to make sure that everything was perfectly spotless and the amount of cleaning you did today could account for your whole lifetime. You were cleaning the stove and just as you were about to grab another clean sponge you see Changbin with a whole box full of donuts from Krispy Kreme.
“How’s it goin’ babe?” Changbin asks while setting the donuts onto the table, he sees you wearing an apron and giant yellow gloves, “looks like you’ve been doing some serious, hard labor!”
“I’ve been cleaning for 5 hours now..” You say with an exhausted look on your face, “I haven’t even finished cleaning the stove yet.”
“Who cares about the stove y/n,” Changbin says, chuckling at your frustration about needing everything to be neat and tidy.
“I’m serious Binnie, I need to clean everything and make sure it’s all perfect!” You tell him while pouting.
“Why don’t you take a break babe.” He suggests out of concern, grabbing your hands to take your gloves off and sets them aside. He slowly brings your body up against the wall behind you, kissing you passionately. He must have been wanting you all day by the way he was hungrily kissing you, the man was sucking on your face for dear life, exploring the depths of your mouth as both your tongues were intertwined. He takes off your apron and grips his hands around your waist while your leg wraps around him, he held you so securely.
As things got more heated, and all your clothes were off, he aligned himself inside you. Your hands were snaked around his neck as you desperately move your hips to feel his cock, feeling every bit of his thrusts in you. Letting out a high-pitched moan as you grab a fistful of his hair and scream his name. Your legs grew weak with each and every stroke Changbin gives you, feeling like you’re going to faint. He continues pounding into you like no tomorrow and you hold tightly onto his shoulders for support. His skin was sticky and sweaty from all the work he’s putting into fucking you, his face looked super focused as he was hitting all the right spots. He was fucking all your stress away at this point and you were feeling so good. You feel yourself coming to your peak as he thrusts into your dripping heat, you’re seeing stars at this point. The harder his strokes were getting, the faster you were to reaching your climax.
“Mmm…gonna cum!” You cry out in pleasure, slowly losing your grip on him as you slip from his grasp. Changbin swiftly picks you up and pins you harder into the wall, making sure you don’t go anywhere by fully pinning his body up against yours. You feel so connected to each other in this very moment as you’re both about to cum, both letting out a string of moans in unison. You both reach your highs together, dizzy as your orgasm washes over you, feeling his cum leaking out of your cunt and dripping down to your leg. You just spent the whole day cleaning and now you have to get cleaned up before your parents come in approximately 30 minutes.
HYUNJIN. It was a long day at work, you were about 6 hours in and you already wanted to end it all. You work at a clothing store and on this particular day for some reason everyone and their mom wanted to come shopping. You’ve been working the register nonstop and you had yet to take a break, you were so busy that you forgot to even take one. You asked one of your coworkers if they could cover for you while you go on lunch and they said yes. You were so excited to finally be able to get to sit down and eat. As you sat in the break room you checked your phone for any missed messages, you see that you have a bunch of missed texts from the new guy you’re seeing. Hyunjin’s name is plastered on your phone and you check the messages straight away, eyes growing wide at what was shown before you. Hyunjin sent you a string of messages:
‘Hey y/n, what’s up?’ [1:15 pm]
‘Imyyy’ [1:25 pm]
‘Wyd? Are you at work?’ [1:42 pm]
‘Yea you’re prob at work :P’ [2:26 pm]
‘I’m a little horny lol’ [2:41 pm]
‘I want youuuu’ [3:02 pm]
He then proceeds to send you a couple shirtless pics of him in bed and a short video of him stroking his erect cock through his boxers. You quickly look around to see if anyone would be able to notice and you don’t see anyone else in the break room besides you. That’s when you open the video fully to see the rest, quickly get turned on as your wetness is only growing. You ran to the bathroom so you can send a photo back, snapping a quick pic of your boobs under your shirt and telling him how wet that video made you at work. You love that he now comes to you for when he feels needy, you like that he craves your attention while you’re gone. He sends you another message saying how much badly he wants to fuck you and he can’t to pick you up from work. You smile at that and tell him you only have 2 more hours to go.
You realize it’s time to get back to work and now all you can think about is that damn video Hyunjin sent you. The way he was stroking his cock all nice and slow made you want to be there to give him even more pleasure. You were walking around all day with wet and sticky panties since you came a little bit from fingering yourself in the bathroom to the video. You couldn’t wait to bounce on Hyunjin’s cock all night after you get off work.
HAN. This was now the fifth dress you tried on and you still haven’t figured out a style you liked yet. You were getting frustrated but you weren’t going to let your pickiness get you down from shopping. You were at the mall with your boyfriend Han and as much as he hated shopping he liked to see you try on the pretty dresses for him so it was a win-win. You go to a different store now and you check out those dresses, making a beeline for the pink ones since that was your favorite color. You check out all the various designs and ask Han which ones he liked best, he didn’t really give much input and just picked the shortest one for you.
You gave him a playful side eye and put the dresses you didn’t like back, heading over to the dressing room so you can try everything on. As you were trying on the dresses, Han was sitting on a bench outside the door, texting all his homies. He soon started to notice how long it’s taking you in there and although you were busy trying on dresses he was getting tired of sitting here and waiting for what seemed like an eternity. He sighs as he figures out what to do, but he ends up deciding to knock on your dressing room door. You don’t reply but he can hear stuff rustling from the inside so he knocks again and tells you it’s just him.
“Uh… I think I need help,” you tell him reluctantly, he’s not sure what you need help with but he comes in anyway. He sees you standing in the dressing room with your hands in the air and the dress halfway up your body, he starts to laugh at how you were stuck in it.
“This isn’t a laughing matter, please help get this damn thing off of me!” You whine, and he begins to unzip the dress from the back, releasing you from its tight grip. You feel like you can finally breathe once again and slip the dress off of you, now completely naked in front of Han. You were only wearing your skimpy g-string and you had your nipples pierced which Han loved about you. He looks you up and down, licking his lips as if he was about to destroy you. The only thought in his head right now was to kiss you, so he grabs your face and crashes his lips into yours, moving some of your hair out the way. You kiss him back but harder and even more passionately, letting him fondle your boobs and play with your piercing. As he toys with your nipples he looks at you with pure lust, his eyes were all hazy and he looked nothing but in love with you. He started kissing your chin and licked the side of your neck, making you get all wet and worked up for him.
“We shouldn’t be doing this right here baby,” you tell Han as he continues roaming all over your body.
“Doesn’t that make you wanna do it even more though?” He says mischievously, sucking on your neck and giving you small hickies. You knew the chances of getting caught were very high but at this moment, you didn’t really seem to care. All you wanted right now was Han and that’s all that was on your mind. His hands slid down between your legs, spreading your pussy lips with his fingers and coating them with your essence. Your wetness was leaking down to your thighs and it took everything in you not to scream from Han’s touch. He inserts two fingers in your tight little hole and goes in and out slowly, you press your lips together trying not to make a sound, so he covers your mouth.
“Shhh… quiet babe,” He whispers into your ear.
FELIX. It’s not secret to Felix that you were a workaholic, you often immersed yourself in your work a little too much. He knows you are an independent woman that enjoys the freedom of working but at the same time he really wishes you’d give that same energy towards him sometimes. You traveled a lot for work and although you two live together, it still puts a strain on your relationship being apart for long periods of times. Felix loves to be around his lover and the fact you are always so busy with work makes him want to shower you with even more love and affection when he sees you. You were gone on another usual business trip but this time it was for a week, that was the longest you’ve gone for work and it was driving him insane. Everyday he thought of you and he would text you little things that he saw randomly throughout the day that reminded him of you. You always appreciated how much Felix adored you and your work ethic, he loved you for you.
The day you came back home from work Felix came to you with open arms, he was more than excited to see you again and all he wanted for the past week was the attention of his beautiful lover.
“I’ve missed you so so much baby,” Felix says whilst giving you the biggest hug, his body was so warm and you melted right into him. You gave him a kiss and he moves you both over to the couch, pulling away from kissing you for a second with a weird grin plastered on his face.
“What’s with that look?” You ask, wondering what he’s thinking in that head of his.
“I got you a little something, I’ll be right back,” he quickly runs to your shared room and comes back with a black box in his hand.
“What’s this?” You ask curiously, holding the box up to examine what it could be.
“Just open it, you’ll be surprised.”
You do as you’re told and open the box, you see a purple velvet bag and you open to see what’s inside. It was a vibrator, it had multiple settings and looked very high quality and expensive. You instantly blushed as you held the item in your hand, looking up at Felix so he can explain what’s going on.
“I wanted to get something to relieve your stress..” he continues “because you’re always so busy and stuff, y’know.”
You smile at the naughty gift your boyfriend gave you, giving him another kiss and thanking him.
“Want to use it on me now?” You ask, knowing that he’ll say yes to you in a heartbeat. Felix’s eyes light up like a kid in a candy store and he agrees without hesitation. He sits next to you on the couch with the toy in his hand and you’re now making out. As one thing leads to another, you end up naked lying on your back with your legs spread wide out for him. He has the toy on one of the highest settings and you’ve squirted about three times for him already.
“Come on baby, you can give me another. Just one more,” Felix says demandingly, having too much fun with this toy.
You spring your head back as you feel the toy in your soaking wet entrance, you don’t know how much more of this you can take. Your legs were violently shaking and the couch was soaked with your juices, you felt like you didn’t have anything left in you. Felix keeps fucking the toy in and out of you making you scream out for him, he palms himself through his pants as he does it.
“I never want you to be away from me again y/n,” Felix’s deep voice rasps as he pumps the toy into you deeper, “I mean it this time.”
SEUNGMIN. You were laughing hysterically as you were scrolling through TikTok, you’ve been glued to your phone for hours at this point. You showed Seungmin, who was sitting next to you on his bed yet another TikTok that he probably wouldn’t think is funny. You put the screen up to his face to show him the video and he looks but doesn’t really seem that interested. You tell him how funny you think the video is and he just shrugs his shoulders.
“You know, I’d rather have you shoved in my face rather than a phone.” Seungmin says to you.
‘Ok boomer’ you think to yourself, not wanting to actually say it incase he gets offended. You decide to just ignore his comment and go back to watching hilarious TikToks. Seungmin starts to get bored and he when he gets bored he becomes bratty. You hear him whine a little bit, looking up from your phone to see him pouting and all you want to do is give him a kiss.
“C’mere,” You command for him to come closer, he quickly does so looking like a lost puppy. He plants a chaste kiss to your lips, then begins to leave a trail of kisses down your neck. He slips a hand under your tank top and lightly squeezes your boob. You sigh as you feel him innocently brush past your nipples, then he trails some more kisses down your stomach. Once he makes his way down to your lower body, he quickly takes off your pants with ease. Teasing your clothed pussy a little bit, watching as a wet spot starts to appear from the outside, he circles your clit and starts to sniff you.
“You smell good baby,” Seungmin compliments, finally taking off your panties and tossing them somewhere on the bed. He kisses the inside of your thighs and feels the warmth of your skin on his lips. He loves every inch of you and he wants to take his time with you. Flicking his tongue on your clit and you hiss at the feeling, you want him to fuck you with his tongue. He licks a nice long stripe across your wet folds, staring up at you while doing so, your phone still in your hand the whole time. Seungmin brought his head up more to face you, “keep looking at your phone while I eat you out babe, pretend like I’m not even here.”
You comply with his instructions, continuing to watch TikToks like normal and Seungmin goes back to devouring your pussy like the good boy he is.
JEONGIN. It was a very nerve wrecking day for you, you were meeting Jeongin’s parents for the first time today. You put on your most expensive Dior perfume and prettiest heels to meet his mom since Jeongin told you she was very into fashion and can tell when girl’s wear cheap perfume. You wanted to impress this woman as much as possible since this was definitely going to be the man you wanted to marry someday. Jeongin reassures you the whole day that she was going to love you regardless,
“Even if you wore perfume from the Dollar Tree she’d still like you!” He tries to give reassurance. You don’t believe that’s true but when you get to his mom’s house you meet her and the rest of his family. His dad was super nice and everyone was very welcoming towards you. You were actually shocked by how chill and laid back everyone was, you felt bad for assuming that they would be mean to you. Jeongin’s mom was the last person you met, when you met her she came off as a little timid but then she started to warming up to you once you started having a lot of things in common.
She was really sweet and super funny, you now know why Jeongin is such a charming guy. You see Jeongin come up to you so he can pull you away from his mom for a bit but his mom brushes him off to tell him she wasn’t finished talking. He walks away with a defeated look on his face and you continue talking with his mom. When the food is ready everyone gathers at the table to eat and you sit beside Jeongin, his mom was across from you both. You were busy for most of the day talking with his family and getting to know everyone. He wanted to be with you but he couldn’t even get the chance, feeling left out in the conversation. You feel your phone vibrate from the table and you pick it up to see who it is, seeing that it’s from Jeongin but you’re confused because he’s sitting right next to you. You turn towards him to ask him why he just texted you but he puts his finger to his mouth to tell you it’s a secret. You place your phone under the table to look at the message,
‘Come meet me in the bathroom upstairs by the laundry room ;)’
You instantly blush from reading that text and try to hide your flustered expression. You look at him and nod your head to signal that you understand. Jeongin shoots his head up and tells his parents who were across the table from him that he needs to be excused to go to the bathroom. You shoot yourself in the foot thinking about what excuse you can come up with so you both don’t look sketchy.
“Sorry please excuse me I have to take this important call for my job,” you quickly say to his parents as you head over to where you’re supposed to go.
You meet Jeongin in the bathroom where he told you to and you went straight to heavily making out. He grabs your ass and spanks it lightly, “How long you think we can be in here before they start to notice?” You ask, his lips now glued to your neck.
“I dunno, I honestly don’t really give a fuck.” He says bluntly, turning you around to face the sink and the mirror, pressing his bulge against your ass. He starts grinding his dick against you slowly, kissing your neck and running his fingers down your body. He lifts up your dress and drags his cock to rub against your clothed cunt, you lowly moan his name and he smiles. He’s about to fuck you so hard against this sink all the while his parents not having a clue where you two went.
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lokischocolatefountain · 9 months ago
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Denial || Men Like Me
Part 2 of the Men Like Me series. Part 1
Masterlist
Fandom: The Last of Us Pairing: Joel Miller x Virgin!Reader Rating: 18+ Warnings: girthy age gap, virgin!reader, eventual loss of virginity (not in this chapter), masturbation (male & female), cis fem reader, descriptions of reader's body, somewhat creepy!Joel, fetishization of youth, dom!Joel, Joel ignores you until he can't, slightly insecure reader, very insecure Joel, corruption kink, mild fem!dom, reader turns the tables a little, name calling, fetishization of virginity, face fucking (not the mouth, but cheek), kneeling, stripping, moneyshot, fingering, sexual discoveries. Word count: 10.4k Summary: After your steamy encounter, Joel ignores you out of guilt, leaving you feeling unworthy. But you make a discovery that makes you turn the tables on him. A/N: The reception that chapter 1 got gave me enough serotonin to keep me going, you guys. I hope everyone likes this chapter at least half as much if not as much as the first one. Even the half would give me a lot of joy. And do say hi in my inbox or my asks. I would loooove to talk about these two. As always, pleaaaaaase give me reblog and/or a comment to recharge my writing batteries. Most importantly, a big thanks to @tobuildahomeinthewoods because the smut part was from their idea in the last chapter's comments .
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“Long day, huh?” 
“What?” you asked, your brain taking a second too long to process the words. “Yeah. Yeah, yeah,” you said, going back to your glass of whiskey. 
“I heard about the kids. They gotta be more careful,” Tommy said, looking to his brother for some kind of confirmation. Joel nodded hesitantly, his eyes looking everywhere but you as he traced the rim of his glass with his middle finger. So cavalier like he didn’t fuck you with that very finger. Asshole. 
“Yeah, yeah. Climbing trees is not wise,” you agreed, willing yourself to look away from his brother. You didn’t want to get caught staring, or worse glaring. The chatter of the dinner crowd at the Tipsy Bison drowned into the sound of you tapping your fingers on the wood counter of the bar. You got up abruptly, the bar stool going down from the force of your actions. You bent over to pick it up, a hand moving to your chest instinctively to keep from flashing everyone. With no such protection for your ass, you could feel familiar eyes on them. Eyes that you’d become accustomed to having on you no matter the distance. 
“You ok–” Tommy began, but you cut him off.
“You have a good one, Tommy,” you said, grabbing your bag from the bar counter and slinging it over your shoulder. “I gotta go. I’m really tired.” 
Like the fool that you were, you picked your glass up and downed the rest of the whiskey, your throat rejecting the choice with a cough that had you spit out half of the burning liquor. Great. Now you’d have to wash your scrubs before going to bed so it didn’t stain. Fucking great. 
There were some protests from the younger Miller brother, some words of concern. But you ignored him as you hurried out of the Tipsy Bison and into the night. At least one of the Millers had some manners. And it wasn’t the one that broke into your house and showed you what a clitoris was. It was fucking embarrassing that he was ignoring you after that. Even more embarrassing that you had to learn it from a random guy when you were the one poring over anatomy textbooks trying to become a doctor. You should know anatomy better than anyone else. Your mentor should’ve taught you. You’d learned how to conduct a safe childbirth. Even been allowed to close up the last c-section patient. But you didn’t fucking learn how the baby got in there. 
Alright well, you did. But you hadn’t been told about some of the especially sensitive parts of the body that would be involved in the process. 
You tossed your bag on your couch, got yourself some cookies that you traded for last week and climbed up the stairs to your bedroom. It wasn’t a nutritious dinner, but it filled your tummy. It came in handy when you didn’t want to spend time chopping vegetables and boiling pasta or whatever the hell you had to do to cook. 
Your bedroom had become your prison in the last two weeks. You felt trapped, unable to see beyond it. How could you, when it ironically was right here that you found freedom? 
Even as you did something as mundane as eating cookies on bed and spilled crumbs on your sheets like a child, the chair in front of your dressing table was in sight. From where you sat, you could see very clearly the scratch on the black paint that revealed the light wood underneath. Evidence of how you had to hold on to dear life as Joel worked your pussy expertly. Like he knew it as well as he knew the tools of his trade. Like weaving his fingers between your folds was as familiar to him as it was for you to weave through skin with your suture needle and thread.
You felt yourself dripping at the mere memory of his thick fingers pumping away inside you, unraveling the fibers of your being. The sight of him at the bar– his finger tracing the rim of the glass– it took you to the memory of that very finger teasing your pussy.
The pornographic magazines, the entertainment for men, no longer saw the light of day from their box under your bed. Pictures of nude women you wanted to model yourself after in order to be attractive to men no longer sufficed. All you strived for now was to be attractive to him. To be strung like a puppet in his hands while all he seemed to want was to get away from any place where you were. 
You felt a pang in your chest as you recalled the first time you went to the house of worship after your time with Joel to find that he’d been replaced with the younger Miller. Tears stung in your eyes as you felt rejected by his absence. Like he no longer wanted to be in the same room as you, hammer nails into wood as you spoke to your fellow townspeople about their wellbeing. You told yourself it was just a temporary thing. That the brothers just liked to alternate shifts and he would return soon to fix the windows that shattered during a storm in the winter. 
He never came. 
You’d never experienced such rejection before. You’d never wanted before. To want was to risk rejection, to feel the pit in your stomach as you felt now. You never wanted to feel less than, undesirable, unwanted. So you pulled away from all the men you dated. If you could even call that dating. Maybe it was your own fault for thinking it would be easier with Joel. What did you think? That he would fold immediately because you showed off your legs and touched his arm and pushed your breasts out to present your femininity? 
Naive, stupid girl. 
“Been experiencing longer than you’ve been alive, Ma’am.” 
Something twisted in your belly and you lied down, pulling your covers over you as though it would contain the shame coursing through you. 
You probably looked silly to him, like a little girl playing adult. Like a kitten picking a fight with a lion. Less than half his age, just a fucking preschooler on outbreak day when he would’ve been a fully grown man. Maybe already beginning to gray, the skin by his eyes crinkled from the years he spent smiling at and wooing women. Why would he want a girl? He’d want a real woman. Someone like Tommy’s wife, perhaps. Someone he wouldn’t have to teach.
“Don’t know your own fucking body but you want a man?” his taunt rang cold in your ear, sending chills down your spine like he was still behind you, fingers buried deep inside the most intimate part of you. You pressed your thighs together, heat pooling between them as it always happened when you thought of what he did to you. 
Shame didn’t deter you as you brought your fingers to your pussy, brushing one against your clit with curiosity. With fear. It felt so good, like its sole purpose went beyond the animal need to survive and propagate. You bypassed it to touch your weeping slit, more comfortable with what you were already used to for carnal pleasure.
Your own fingers had always been enough. Out in the wilderness when you needed to release pent up energy. After long days at the clinic and sharing notes with the other students. When you were tired to the point where you couldn’t sleep. Your fingers always took you to where you needed. You were always satisfied.  
Not anymore. 
You whined as the different angles you tried failed to work. The physical pleasure was the same. But not quite like how it felt with him. His hand was larger, his fingers longer and thicker. He showed you sports inside you that you’d never been able to touch yourself. Maybe this was what people meant when they said ignorance was bliss. Knowledge of pleasure you could have but couldn’t give yourself was torture.
As much as you resented Joel now, you couldn’t help but conjure images of him as you brought yourself closer to release. His deep brown eyes, his large hand that he wrapped around your throat, the way he carried you from your chair and deposited you on your bed. Like a human being weighed nothing to him. Like you were his toy that he could bury his fingers in, play with and set aside when he was done, when he was bored. Entertainment for Men came to your mind again and you cried like you never had at your own touch. 
Your thighs trembled as you imagined yourself as one of those women in the magazines, but only for him. Entertainment for Joel. Splayed out on the center page for him to look at and fuck his hand to. You wouldn’t mind being tangible entertainment. Laid out on his bed, limbs arranged in an attractive manner for him, so he could access whatever part of your body he wanted to play with. To be bent to his will and fucked, to be used, given an affectionate pat on your pussy and put away when you’d outlasted his needs only to be given attention when he wanted to get off the next time. 
You shook uncontrollably, your eyes squeezed shut and the world went blank as you reached your peak. You pulled your spare pillow to your chest, needing some physical comfort after experiencing such a high. You wished it were him instead of an inanimate object. That he would make you feel good and hold you and kiss you all over. That he would stay when you woke up the next day and do it all over again. 
Once the haze of your orgasm cleared up, you cringed at the feelings it had brought out of you. How stupid… Wanting a man who broke in, fucked you with his fingers, and began ignoring you like you did something horrible to him. Fuck Joel Miller and fucking his stupid fucking face. As he said, there were other men in the town. Men who wouldn’t ignore you.
“How are the windows lookin’?” 
“Fixed ‘em up in time for the cold winds. No thanks to you, fuckin’ asshole.” 
“Sorry. Y’know I ain’t the church going type.” It wasn’t a lie. He wasn’t the church kind before Sarah died and he certainly wasn’t anymore. That the young aspiring doctor he fingered in her bedroom was the real reason behind him swapping work would remain his secret.
“Yeah, yeah,” Tommy grumbled, playing with the now cold fries on his plate. “It ain’t a church, by the way. Maria keeps correctin’ me. It’s the house of worship.” 
Joel rolled his eyes at that. He got the reasoning behind it. The town had people who believed in different Gods and had different religions. Calling the place a Church would be as unfair as calling it a– whatever, he didn’t know any other kind of place for worship. But it still pissed him off when his little brother came to him and went on about something his wife said.
Go off and do whatever your wife tells you, motherfucker.
No matter how he tried, the snide voice in his head that hated Maria never went away. He never said anything to her or Tommy. Maria was decent to him too, unlike the time he first arrived with Ellie. She trusted him with Miles. Invited him and Ellie over to family dinners. But they kept their interactions to a minimum, as though there’d been a silent agreement that it was best they kept it civil so as to not sow discord in the family. 
“Whatever. No point in worshiping, be it Jesus or whatever stuff they got goin’ these days.”
A shudder went down his spine, triggered by the talk of religion. As it became colder, Ellie had begun to revert to the empty shell of a child she was after the events in Colorado. There’d been grifters in the past hiding behind religion to cheat people out of their money, to damage children irreparably while preaching the word of God. The end of the fucking world somehow didn’t stop them from going on. Didn’t stop people from believing that an all-knowing, all-powerful guy in the sky was still watching and would protect them. 
If what protected people was God, guns were God. And Molotov cocktails. Sharp rocks and shoelaces.
Ellie didn’t tell him much, but from what he could piece together, it was a religious group with one guy leading them. And they were fuckin’ cannibals. Sounded like a goddamn cult.
“It’s a nice place to meet people,” said Tommy, snapping him out of his descent into the void of the recent past. 
Joel simply snorted and took a sip of his glass of water. He couldn’t handle his alcohol like he used to. Age and that he had been off his usual cocktail of oxy and whiskey for a long time now. He had to resort to having a lot of water to sober himself up after the occasional evening drinks with Tommy. 
“What? It is! I go there, catch up with everyone in town. Usually people go there when they’re going through some shit. It makes them feel conscious if you visit their house. So I just run into ‘em at the Chu– house of worship– and I just talk to them about their lives ‘n see if there’s anything I can do for them.” 
“Guess you’re right,” he said, slotting his thumbnail in the ridges on the bar counter absentmindedly, scraping off bits of the old softening wood. 
He could go again. Only so many days he could ignore you. But the reminder of the shame coursing through his veins when he saw you this evening made him shake the thoughts off. There was no way he could be anywhere you were without shriveling up and dying of embarrassment. 
You were so young.
Relatively unblemished by the world. A fuckin’ virgin. Never known the touch of a man and moaning his name as you touched yourself. 
Nope, nope, nope. Shouldn't have gone there, he thought as he felt himself hardening in his pants. Shouldn’t his dick be non-functional by now? He was dangerously close to sixty and spent a good two decades without adequate nutrition. Shouldn’t that be enough to turn his dick limp forever?
“Come over tomorrow, then. We’re doin’ a little memorial thing in the back of the house of worship. That young doctor’s idea, actually. She put the idea forward at the last council meeting. Thinks it’ll help people to have something physical to remember their people by.” 
Young, sweet, and so fucking thoughtful. 
Not meant for men like him.
Yet he went the next day. 
The topic of Sarah hung in the air around him and Tommy like a fog beyond which they couldn’t see. It sat heavy in his chest, the memory of his baby and worse, everything his shit brain had forgotten. He remembered that she gave him shit, mocked him over everything. But she didn’t have a voice in his head anymore. He could describe the sweetness of her voice, but it no longer sounded out in his mind. No matter how hard he tried. 
Her favorite color was purple and she loved soccer. He couldn’t recall the name of her team. She loved reading. He didn’t remember her favorite author. She liked animated movies. He couldn’t remember a single one. Just the vague memory of her falling asleep on his lap as cartoon characters chirped away on tv. Even her face was beginning to blur. When he recalled her features, it was only through images of the last seconds of her life.
“We could just do alphabetical order. Simple.” 
“Not really,” you said, scribbling lines on the paper. “We get new people in the town sometimes and we don’t want the names they add to stand out, away from the alphabetically ordered list. Might make them feel bad.”
“Yeah, you’re right. What about age?” Tommy suggested. 
“Still the same problem. It would force newcomers to have their own separate list at the bottom.” 
“How about a first come first serve system? We tell people when we’re taking names down for the memorial and they can come over, form a queue and give us the names they want included. That way, people can keep the names of the people they love in one spot on the memorial instead of having it scattered all over because of age or alphabetical order.” 
“What do you think, Joel?” Tommy asked, making him fold his arms over his chest and sigh. He didn’t give a shit. But that wasn’t the most amicale thing to say when someone was trying to do an objectively good deed. Unlike the other people in this town, he didn’t deserve to add the names of his people to a memorial. He failed in protecting them. He didn’t deserve to mourn like he wasn’t the reason they went into early graves. 
“Yeah, ‘s good. I agree.” He said, finding no faults with your proposal to order the names of the deceased by the order in which people gave it to ‘em. He didn’t know why he was being asked all this. It wasn’t like he was on the council like them. He was just takin’ measurements when he got dragged into this. 
“How many names do you think we’ll get?” Tommy asked him in yet another attempt to get him involved. 
Taking pity on his brother, he began a rough estimate of the number of names they’d get for the memorial and how much surface area they’d need for carving them in. “Six hundred people in town. Babies don’t have names to give. Kids wouldn’t have too many and if they had any, it would be on their parents’ list too. How many kids in this town?”
It was a fucking nightmare, sitting there at the table with you and doing calculations when all he wanted was to throw you over his shoulder and take you back to his place. Make you pose like you were posing in front of your mirror that day. Like women in those porno magazines he sneaked into his teenage bedroom and jerked off to. The fuck were you even thinking? Door left open, tits out, fingers in your cunt and his fucking name on your lips. 
Did you notice him at your door and decided it would be a fun trick to play on an old man? Or did you always scream his name when you fucked yourself? When was the first time? Did you always come so prettily on your own fingers like you came on his? Being in the dark drove him crazy. But part of him felt that getting the answers would drive him absolutely fucking insane. 
The thought alone was enough to make him feel uncomfortable in his pants. He adjusted himself on his seat and looked away from you, afraid that somehow you’d be able to tell that he was having improper thoughts about you when you were talking about honoring the dead. If thinking about you sexually in a church was bad, he was sure it was worse to think it when you were trying to help people memorialize their dead.
You had an air of innocence about you. The brightness of your eyes and the way you moved your hands about as you planned the details of this memorial and scribbled them out on your little notebook. He’d been attracted to that innocence from the very start. A rare thing to find out in the world. When even babies were born into violence and oppression, innocence was a luxury no one even thought to acquire. 
A virgin, too. 
His cock twitched in his pants. He gulped and looked around to check if anyone had caught his shameless response. Nope. 
He was surprised you were a virgin. For all your innocence, you were also fucking beautiful. There were plenty of guys in town. Ladies too, if you liked that. Anyone would’ve snatched you up quick and made sure to show you a world of pleasure. It didn’t take him long knowing you to give in to temptation. It was fucking impossible that no man had worshipped with his head between your thighs. That no man who saw you in your pretty little dresses bent you over and filled you up with his cock.
You were beautiful. Even more so when you came on his fingers. Made all those pretty little sounds. The way you said his name… Nobody had said it like that in such a long time. Not even Tess. 
It rang in his head whenever he found himself alone at home. Being in possession of your panties didn’t help matters. White cotton. Innocent. Covered in your dried up release. When he left that day, he made sure to suck on his fingers. Moaned like a fucking creep while going down your stairs. Eyes closed, he could still taste you on his tongue. After so many days. A little tangy with a hint of salt from your sweat and all woman. 
It had been embarrassingly long since he felt like a man. He’d been father, brother, smuggler, and father again. But long since he was just man. Never someone desirable. Out there, sex was just for release. Purely biological. The end of the fucking world did not afford good hygiene. You fucked someone because they were the safest option. Not because you were attracted to them.
You, however… You had others in this town. You were here before him. Younger, smarter, with a body that worked perfectly fucking well. You could have anyone but it was his name you were moaning out in the privacy of your room. 
He grunted as your voice crept back into his mind. The ‘Joel, please’, and the ‘Sir’. 
He grabbed on to the railing as his thighs trembled, afraid he would have an embarrassing fall. His breaths grew quicker and his mind void of everything but you. 
On your knees. On your back. On your front so he could fuck you from behind. Your hand around his cock. Your lips stretched out around him as you struggled with his size. Fistful of your hair as you begged for release. Please, Sir. Please, Joel.  The heat of your tight velvety cunt. Tears blurring your wide eyed innocence as he stretched out your rear hole. He wanted to take you everywhere, leave you burning with him. Mark you so deep every man you let in after you would know who fucked you first.
It didn't take long. The mental images of you were far too effective. His last time was too long ago. He was too old to last. Too old to want you. Somehow the reminder only pushed him further along. Sticky white cum coated your panties, mixing your scent with his. The mirror showed him a reflection of himself. Old, gray, crow’s feet by his eyes. He dropped your panties in the hamper, the warmth of his own release on his hand and the shame on his face sobering him up quickly. 
He wanted to teach you sin. But you had taught him more of it already than you would ever know.
“Cool jacket, dude!” 
“Uh…thanks. I traded for it years ago” you said, digging your thumb nail between the teeth of the zipper. It didn’t fit perfectly, but it worked well on cold nights that weren’t cold enough to warrant a sweater. “Is Joel in? I need to talk to him about a building project.”
“Yeah,” said Ellie before pressing her lips into a thin line. “I mean, he was awake half an hour ago when I left, but he could be in dreamland by now. Cause he’s old.” 
“Ah. Of course,” you said, smiling awkwardly at the girl. Joel’s kind of, sort of daughter. You were closer to her than Joel in age. You rolled the memorial plan tighter and tighter, your hands needing to be occupied with something as your mind reeled at the inappropriateness of your desires.
“I’ll make sure I don’t wake him up,” you said before leaving the girl to return to her group of friends. 
He was old enough to be your father. It should disgust you, scare you. Maybe it would’ve if you’d had an actual father in your life. A point of reference to know how vile a man of that age would have to be to want a girl your age. You tried to force some disgust into your veins, hoping that would help in putting out the fire in you that threatened to consume you whole. But it was hard to convince yourself that this was wrong when he’d made you feel so good. 
Your fingers had become inadequate overnight. If his fingers were so powerful over you… You shuddered to think what he could do for you with his penis. It had to feel better. The organ was made for it, unlike fingers.
You stopped outside his door and knocked without giving it a single thought. If you’d thought about it, you would’ve fled. It had already taken you hours to muster up the courage to make the walk to his house with the draft sketches for the memorial. You wouldn’t let your desperation ruin it. 
He looked surprised to see you, mouth opening and closing as though he’d forgotten how to process language. His dark brown curls and the silver that decorated it sat messily atop his head. Like he’d run his fingers through it. An old t-shirt stretched over his chest and struggled against his arms. A pair of dark sweatpants sat on his hips, the drawstrings hanging in the front. 
“Hey? Uh…what’s wrong?” he asked, bringing a hand up to his face and scratching his beard. Why was that hot? You had to be out of your fucking mind.
You cleared your throat and looked up into his eyes. “Does something have to be wrong?”
“You’ve never come here, so I thought…” 
“I’m here about the memorial plans. I have a few designs I want to run by you,” you said, holding up the rolled up sheets of paper.
“Ah. That. Sure, uh come in,” he said, opening the door and stepping aside to allow you passage. You looked around his house, careful to seem disinterested so he didn’t have more reasons to think you were a stupid little girl pining after him just because he made you come once. 
Shit. He probably already thought that. 
“A virgin. Pretty young things like you ain’t for men like me.”
You swallowed at the reminder as he led you to the dining table and offered you a seat. You looked around while he cleared the table. Plates, tools, some worn out novels. So he was the messy sort. You didn’t know who you would be if you’d had the chance to just be. You didn’t know if you would leave things lying around like that if you’d had a normal start to life. Like Joel. Like the others who were old enough to remember life before the cordyceps.
The place didn’t scream Joel Miller. There were no personal artifacts decorating his living room. No framed art. No books. No throw pillows or even a blanket on the couch. 
You knew what it was like to have nothing in your house. When you were still new to the town and it hadn’t hit you yet that you were allowed to have your own things. Collect stuff and not worry about having too many things to carry with you when you had to run. You didn’t own anything you couldn’t fit into your backpack. And you took that backpack everywhere when you managed to step outside your new house. 
But over time, you’d decorated your house. People you helped out at the clinic often gave you things as a token of their gratitude. Kids drew pictures for you. A lady once gave you the art off her wall that the previous owner had put up. Tommy and Maria gave you a new sweater that she’d knit when she was pregnant. New yarn from new wool from the town’s sheep. The first time you ever got something truly new. 
“No decorations, huh?” 
“What?”
“You don’t have any decorations here,” you pointed out again and licked your lips nervously.
“Uh, yeah. Not really the priority. Have’ta trade wisely. Can’t be gettin’ pictures when ya need bread.” 
“Yeah,” you said, nodding. “But you don't have to trade for it, you know? You could put up something of what’s in the house already. Surely the previous owners left some stuff.” 
“They did. Traded ‘em all for things we need. Fresh fruits, bullets, that kinda shit.” 
“Well, it doesn’t have to be framed art. You could cut up a nice picture from a magazine or something.” 
Joel looked up from the plans, head tilted and an eyebrow raised. Shit! Of course he thought you were talking about your magazines with the naked women. 
“I didn’t mean it like that!” you said, your voice coming out squeaky. Embarrassed, you cleared your throat and looked down at the plans. 
“Let’s discuss the plans,” he said, his voice all gruff and his tone so stern. 
“I-I- uh… May I use your restroom?” you asked, unable to look him in the eye after what you’d said. After how he’d reacted. You really didn’t mean it like that. But you could see why that would be hard to believe when the last time he saw you, you had a box full of those men’s entertainment magazines on your bed and one open in front of you as you touched yourself. 
Touched yourself and moaned his name. 
“Upstairs, second door to the left.” 
You squeaked out a thanks before you bolted out of his dining room and made your way up the stairs. There were two bathrooms. One decorated with band posters and a poster of a girl with weirdly cut black hair sitting on a motorcycle. Had to be Ellie’s. The second door to the left was another bathroom. Joel’s, apparently. There was just one bar of soap, a toothbrush, and a pot of toothpaste. No shampoo bar. You pulled the toilet seat and lid down before taking a seat. 
You let out a groan and planted your face in your hands. Why the hell did you have to go and make it awkward like it wasn’t already that way. After he made you come that day, he’d refused to be anywhere near you. You hoped it was just coincidence, but after over a week it became undeniable that he was avoiding you. 
He probably thought you were going to catch feelings. A girl in one of the romance novels you read fell in love with a guy who took her virginity. And there was the time you overheard this guy talking about not wanting to sleep with a girl because she was a virgin. He was afraid she would catch feelings and get clingy. 
Now here you were in his bathroom because you thought it was wise to make small talk and ended up insinuating he should put up dirty pictures on his wall. You could scream. But you wouldn’t. There was already enough awkwardness with him. 
You could always jump out of the window and run off to your house. Never speak of this again. Pretend nothing happened if Joel tried to talk to you about it. But something told you that he wouldn’t. He would probably be happy if he never had to interact with you again. You had been acting desperate. He caught you touching yourself moaning his name, for fuck’s sake! 
Your hands, permanently dry from all the times you scrubbed them clean for your patients, found some moisture from your salty tears. It was embarrassing, sitting in the bathroom of a guy who wanted nothing to do with you after you scared him off with your stupid little infatuation. 
You were a grown woman. Still young, but too old to be acting like this. You should have some experience already. Not sniffling over a man more than twice your age. He was right. He had been a grown man with experience longer than you’d been alive. Of course he wanted nothing to do with you. 
The window looked more and more attractive as the seconds passed. It had been a while since you did something like that. You didn’t need to jump out of buildings or trees anymore. You didn’t go on patrols like some residents. With no need to fight for your life and having all the food you could need to never go hungry even once, you’d become a little unfit. If you broke a bone jumping out of Joel’s bathroom window, there would be questions. And everyone would know. You’d have to avoid the whole town instead of just Joel. 
You’d just have to face it. Even if facing it was doing as little as just bidding him goodbye and bolting out of his house without an explanation. You got off his toilet and pressed the flush just so he didn’t think you were weird. Like it fucking mattered. He already found you weird and desperate. 
You washed your hands, letting the water wash away the tears on your hands before wiping your wet hands over your face in an attempt to remove traces of your crying. 
You should’ve just left after that. Not looked around. Not snooped like a creep. You didn’t ever dig. You didn’t have to look too deep to catch it. But a sliver of white peeked out through the netted walls of the laundry hamper. A sliver of white cotton with a light blue stitch. 
Without second thought, you dug into his dirty laundry. You came up with the white cotton fabric, going straight to the gusset where the blue thread stitched the fabric pieces together. The original stitch had given out and you sewed it back together just some time back. The blue thread was all that you had at the time. 
As though the sight of your panties in Joel’s bathroom wasn’t jarring enough, next came the smell. Of you. Your cum. You felt practically hear your own heartbeats as you recalled how he’d cleaned you up with your own panties. You recalled that he stuffed the fabric in his pocket as you lied on your bed, pussy still pulsating from his handiwork, brain melted, and life changed forever. 
You took another whiff of your panties, goosebumps raising the hairs on your body as you felt it. Your cum and something else. It was still damp.
Blood rushed back up to your face and you felt yourself getting tense. 
This fucker. How dare he? You’d been embarrassed just a minute ago over your desires and he was doing this the whole time? Noticing you on the streets and running away for days. Running back to his home where he kept your fucking panties, apparently. Avoiding you for so long only to cum in your panties. 
So he wanted you. 
If not you, he at least wanted sex. Dirrty old man who liked attention from you, but you weren’t even disgusted. Just angry he was pretending to be better than that. He could’ve used any old rag, but he used your panties. 
You brought your defiled panties back up and smelled them again. Strangely, it smelled something like bleach. Or you could be wrong. You’d never… You didn’t know what a man’s release was supposed to smell like. Was it different for each man or did they all smell the same? 
Wetness pooled in your panties as you imagined him touching himself. Large rough hand wrapped around himself. Did he think of you when he did it? Think of you naked in your bedroom and taking his fingers? What did his penis look like? What would it feel like? Soft? Rough? You’d wondered about having one inside you, but never about a particular man’s anatomy. But this was Joel. Joel was the only one who’d gotten this far in your head. 
He couldn’t deny it to you anymore. If nothing else, you could at least call him out for ignoring you when he was wiping his ejaculate off with your stolen panties.
“Joel!” you called out before your fears could talk you out of confronting him. Unsure if he would’ve heard you, you opened the bathroom door and yelled his name out again. “Joel!” 
“What?” 
“Come up here!” 
“What happened?” 
“Just come here.” 
You heard him sigh, the sound followed by the typical grunts and groans he made when standing up. Fuckin’ old man, ruining your life. Ruining your self-confidence. Ruining your fucking panties. His heavy footsteps thudded against the stairs as he climbed up, the sound getting louder as he got closer to the bathroom. 
“Why were you screaming my name like y–” he stopped mid scold, frozen in place by the door as he saw what you had in your hand. He opened and closed his mouth, as though attempting to explain but deciding otherwise. He licked his lips and scratched the back of his neck, his eyes looking everywhere but at you. 
“Do you not have rags, Joel?” you taunted, taking a step towards him and enjoying seeing him step back. You felt powerful, moving a large man with just your voice. It was very unlike how he made you feel all the days he ignored you. Weak, insignificant, undesirable.
“You weren’t meant to– Fuck, I’m sorry!” 
“Which part are you apologizing for? For breaking into my house and touching me? For ignoring me ever since? For stealing my underwear? Or for doing whatever you did with it?”
You moved him out of the bathroom, making him walk backwards in the hallway you hoped led to his bedroom. Even if it didn’t, you’d be fine. You’d exact revenge in any place you can. As long as you got to make him feel the way he made you feel. Pleasure. Shame. Want. 
“I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m so sorry. I never should’ve—”
You took your last step towards him, finally trapping him against a wall. You stood close enough to place your hand on his chest. You licked your lips, the rock hard muscles beneath your touch storing itself away in your mind for later use. 
“Imagine what would happen if I told someone? You sister-in-law, perhaps… She hates you, doesn’t she?” You smirked, though you were screaming on the inside. You didn’t know where you got all this courage from. You didn’t know you had it in you to threaten a man as imposing as Joel. 
He turned pale, his hands up against the wall in surrender. If you’d asked him, he wouldn’t tell you the truth that it was to keep himself from touching you. “Please don’t tell anyone. I won’t do this again, I swear.” 
“Maybe I want you to do this again…” 
“You don’t. Trust me.” 
“Shh!” You said, placing your index finger on his lips. Pink, perfectly shaped, and so damn kissable. “Don’t tell me what I want. You ignored me ever since you walked into my house without my permission and shoved your fingers inside me. I was walking around town believing I wasn’t good enough for big old Joel Miller. What did you say? That you’ve been experiencing longer than I’ve been alive?” 
You raised an eyebrow at him when he didn’t answer. Then he nodded reluctantly.
“Why were you coming in my panties then if I didn't measure up? ” 
“I won’t do it ag—” he groaned when you grabbed his cock through his pants. He let out a low grunt and his Adam’s Apple bobbed in his neck as he swallowed. You replaced your index finger with your thumb, tracing his trembling lips as you lazily stroked his cock with your other thumb. 
He filled your whole hand and there was still more. It took everything in you to not moan at the sheer size of him. To not grind your belly against it to feel it against you. You didn’t know how big it was supposed to be, but the romance novels you read always described the big ones as more desirable. 
“I don’t want to hear excuses. I asked why. Why did you steal my panties, Joel Miller?” 
“I don’t know.” 
“Did you come on it? Don’t fucking lie to me cause I can fucking smell you on it.” 
“I did. I jerked off with it.” You had to choke back a moan at that. No, you had to be strong. Show him you could take the upper hand just like he did with you. You weren’t a little girl with a crush. You were a woman and you could have this effect on a grown man. You refused to be discounted with a pat on your pussy no matter how much you wanted him to touch you like that again. 
“Mmm. And that’s enough to get you going. Just a pair of my panties.” 
“Mhmm.” 
“Show me how you did it.” 
“What?” He asked, eyebrow raised. 
“Show. Me. How you did it.” 
He narrowed his eyes at you, his hand coming up to stroke the base of his neck. “Wh-What?”
You felt your heart thud against your ribs and if you didn’t know from experience and your textbooks, you’d have been afraid that he could hear it. You’d never done anything so daring. You were the timid girl when it came to this stuff. That the thought even occurred to you was a testament to how much you desired Joel. Not just to sleep with any guy, but to have Joel. Without a word, you reached under the skirt of your dress and tugged your panties down. 
He inhaled sharply as you bent down and came back up with your panties. Undyed white fabric, a little green ribbon in the shape of a bow stitched to the front, gusset a light gray from your wetness. 
“Show me. I want to see what you were doing in your bathroom with my panties after ignoring me everyday,” you said, taking his hand and forcing the fabric into it. His hand curled around it and you found yourself feeling lighter. You didn't know how long you could keep up the brave front if he continued to have no response. 
“Take your clothes off.” 
It was like something changed the moment you gave him the garment. His eyes were on you, his gaze unrelenting. He took a step ahead and you stepped backward. His lips curled up in a smirk. It seemed playtime was over… Like a lion letting the cubs play at predation before taking over to show how hunting was really done. 
You didn’t know if you were ready for that… Sure it was nothing he’d never seen before, but it was different. The last time, you didn’t do it with the intention to have him see you. He just happened to see you bare and you didn’t cover up when you realized. 
“I don’t have a box full of dirty magazines. I need to see somethin’,” he said, his eyes going down your frame like they had every right to be there. “Or you could leave these,” he said, holding your panties up in front of your eyes, “and run back home. What d’ya say?”
You swallowed, your hands shaking as you reached behind to find the zipper of your dress. You weren’t going to run off. Not when you’d been desperate for so long to do something, anything with him. Cold air kissed your back as you pulled the zipper down and the hairs on your body stood up in full attention. You pushed the sleeves off your shoulder and shimmied out of the dress, standing in just your dress in front of him. 
He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the wall. He looked you up and down. He tilted his head as he looked you up and down. He radiated superiority, putting you in some kind of a daze. “Your bra too. Show me your tits.” 
The crudeness had more wetness pooling between your legs. You nodded wordlessly, afraid that pathetic whimpers would be the only sound you’d make under his gaze. You reached behind and felt around for the clasp of your bra. With his eyes piercing into you, you failed to find it quickly like you usually did. Your mouth dried up, your tongue sticking to the roof. 
He made no effort to help. A mocking smile assumed its place on his lips as he watched you struggle in front of him. 
When you finally managed your task and stood fully naked, he stood up straight. His tongue darted out and licked his lips. You felt like a piece of meat placed in front of a starving man. Just seconds ago, you were telling yourself you didn’t need his approval, that this would just be revenge. But as he evaluated your body, your pussy wept with the need for your body to be nothing but what he liked.
“Room’s that way.” He nodded in the direction of the room. You turned around and took small steps, your shoulders curling inward and your head bowed in submission. Every inch of your skin burned with the strength of his gaze. 
“Kneel.” 
You placed your knee on his bed, ready to climb up. 
“On the floor.” 
One knee still on his white sheets, you turned around to look at him. He was so large. Imposing. The kind of figure you would follow without question. So, you did. 
“You look pretty on your knees.” 
He took a few steps towards you, stopping when the distance had your neck straightening to look up at him. Large, powerful, imposing. Another step and you were face-to-face with his crotch. His bulge was right there. 
“Go on, take it out. Since you wanted it so bad.” 
Joel didn’t think you would do it. You looked even smaller kneeling at his feet. Meek little thing. He didn’t at all expect you to taunt him the way you did. Especially after you threatened to tell on him to Maria. He fully expected you to start crying. Guess he really underestimated you. Virgin didn’t necessarily mean innocent. 
Yet you folded as soon as he took the reins. He saw the change in you right when he told you to take your clothes off. When your eyes went from determined to defeated. All that spunk evaporated to reveal the little girl underneath. He liked it like that. Made him feel like a real man. Not that there was any scarcity of masculinity in his life of taking out clickers and defending this town. But somethin’ about a beautiful woman accepting his authority did the trick faster than every other display of masculinity. 
Your hands fiddled with his belt, trembling as you tried to take it off. He stopped you with a hand on your wrist. “Just undo the zip.” 
No way he was going to get naked in front of a pretty little twenty something. It wasn’t anything great to look at even before he began a life of violence and traversing the wilderness. Sure he was well built from all the hard physical labor and constant fight for survival. It’d left several unappealing scars on his person. Time had done a number on him too. Especially his pudgy belly. It didn’t help that food flowed free in Jackson, fattening him up a little. 
Thankfully, you listened. You looked up, as though you expected him to complete the task for him. He challenged you with a look. Wanna be a big girl so bad, act like one.
You reached inside his pants and took his cock out. Your lips parted and he heard you inhale through your mouth. His cock hung in front of him, hard from your teasing. He had to give it to you, you were daring for a meek little thing. No one in town would believe him if he told them all that you’d done. And he suspected he didn’t even know the half of it.
“Not too late to back out, you know?” he said, wrapping his hand around himself. It took everything in him to give you an out. As much as he wanted to grab your face, force your mouth open and make you gag around him, he was man enough to let you know you didn’t have to do anything. Young girl probably bit more than you could swallow. And seeing his cock and your mouth so close by showed that he was definitely nothing you could swallow.
“I’m not backing out.” 
“First time seeing one?” 
“Of course not. I work at the clinic. You think I haven’t seen a penis?” 
“No anatomical terms. I ain’t your patient. Go on, touch my cock.” 
You reached up for him, but he stepped back, delighting himself in the disappointment on your face. “Come on, you want a man so bad, work for it.” 
You moved to stand up. “Did I say you could stand up?” 
“No.” 
“Then get back on your fucking knees.” 
You dropped to your knees and he groaned in satisfaction. The euphoria of wielding power over someone rushed through his veins. And he wanted more. It was the same sick satisfaction he got when he beat men to death. When he broke bones and dressed animals he hunted in the wild. “Good girl. You’re going to listen to what I say. Got it?” 
“Yes, Sir.” 
Fuck! That fucking word again.
“Come on, come get it. Hands and knees. Crawl to me.” 
He beckoned you forward with one hand, his other still on his cock. You bent over and god fucking damnit, you were a vision. You were an eager girl and he could see what you could become in the right hands. His hands. The things he could show you… Introduce you to your own body. Bring you pain and pleasure that were indistinguishable.
Your tits hung from your chest, swaying as you crawled towards him. Feverish, bright eyes followed him as he continued to refuse what you wanted. Too fucking late. He warned you. Told you men like him weren’t for pretty little things like you. But you didn’t fucking want to listen. Now you’d have to deal with the consequences. Maybe you’d stay away then. 
“Please, Sir,” you whined so prettily he almost gave in. 
“What are you begging for?” 
“You. Y-your penis.” 
“My cock,” he corrected. “Say it.”
“Your cock, Sir.” 
“Good girl. C’mere,” he said, giving you a nod to come closer. You crawled to him and when he didn’t back away, sat up on your knees. He placed his hand on the back of your neck and gripped your hair, making you hiss. Holding you in place, he brought his cock to your face. You looked up at it, your eyes widening and your mouth slackening. You brought your hand up and touched his tip with just your thumb. The rest of your hand followed, wrapping around him. He gasped silently as you stroked his slit with your thumb, making him leak precum on you. 
“Did…? Did you?” 
“No. Gotta do more ‘n that to make me come. That’s precum.” 
“Oh.” 
He didn’t think you knew what precum was. Probably not the focus of your education here. Not the most important thing when townsfolk came in injured after patrols or suffering from a fever that was life threatening without the medicines of the past. 
He pressed his cock against your cheek. The sight presented a visual of how you’d struggle if you took him in your mouth. He’d have you choking on him before you even took half. He twitched against your face at the mere thought. You were the picture of innocence, even with his cock on your face. Even with the stunt you pulled before he put you back in your place. 
“Think I’ll just do this. Fuck your pretty face.” 
You whimpered, spurring him on. He wanted to force himself inside you, punish your mouth for having the gall to speak to him the way you did. Make you cry from how full of him you were. Give you a sore throat so when you spoke to him again, you’d remember to speak with respect. But you wouldn’t be able to handle it. So he’d settle for defiling your sweet features, hold his cock against your cheek and rut like the animal he was.
“I ain’t gonna lay you out on my bed and take you nice and slow. I’m just gonna use you. ‘s what men like me do.”
He pulled away, giving you another opportunity to rethink this. “You can put your fucking clothes on and leave if you don’t like it.” 
To his surprise, you stayed put on your knees. You shook your head before reaching up and rubbing your cheek against his cock. You let out a soft moan, eyes closed and your thighs pressed together tight. “No, no. I like it.” 
“Fuckin’ slut,” he said, his hand back in your hair. He tugged at it and took his cock in his other hand. He tapped your lips with his tip, smearing the precum that leaked out of him. “You like an older man using your face like it’s a pussy?” 
“Yes, Sir.” 
He snorted, amused. “Never met a virgin slut before. Getting your face fucked before your pussy. Bet you’re wet from this.” 
There was the sweet little whimper from you again. He wanted to hear more of it. Trap you underneath him and make you weep and cry and whimper as he split you in half.
“Let me see. Touch your pussy, show me your slick.” 
You obeyed, spread your knees and touched yourself. Your hand glistened under the light of his bedroom, your wetness stretching between your fingers in strings. “Goddamn, would you look at that…” he said in a low rumble. “Rub it on my cock.” 
Your hand trembled slightly and you stared at him with a blank look in your eyes. He guided your hand to his cock, withdrawing his hand when he’d brought you close enough so you could decide whether you wanted to follow his command. You touched your slickened hand to his cock, covering him in the evidence that you wanted this. Wanted him. You reached between your legs and brought more of yourself, eyes soft yet glazed with lust as you smeared yourself all over his length. 
“Ask me for it.” 
“Please,” you whined. 
“Please, what?” 
“P-please fuck my face. Sir.” 
He returned his cock to your cheek, your wetness lubricating your face. Hand cradling his cock, he began to thrust. It wasnt much different from fucking his own fist. It was just skin. Not the tight velvety wetness of a pussy or a throat that would gag with his thickness. But your face was softer than his gun callused hands. Even better was your pretty face, looking up at him so adoringly… So full of desire. 
He didn’t have to let his imagination do the trick now. Not when you were right in front of him, lending yourself for his use. And no imagination, no memory did justice to you. Your body. Scarred, but beautiful. Tits that filled his large hands, clean and styled hair, a belly that showed you were well fed. He wanted to lay you out on his bed and consume you. Take your tits in his mouth, grab handfuls of your ass, spread your cunt lips and lodge himself inside you. Give it to you hard so your thigh jiggled and you felt them ache as they rubbed against each other when you walked around in your pretty little dresses. 
But as depraved as he was, he knew he shouldn’t be the first to take you. He’d have you just this once. Store your image in his head to get off with for as long as his dick worked. You acted all brave, but he couldn’t shake off that you were still inexperienced. The first time was meant to be good. The world was no longer normal, but you could have normality within the insular walls of Jackson. 
Even this was wrong. Using you like this instead of making sweet love to you. But he hadn’t been that man in a long time. He was selfish and cruel. If there was no town, no community where everyone knew everyone and you still threw yourself at him, he would’ve taken you in all your holes with no hesitation. Ruined you, kept you until your body wasn’t of use and tossed you aside. But being in this semi-normal place had gotten its claws into him. Softened him up.
He grew closer to the edge embarrassingly quickly, the haze of carnal pleasure beginning to muffle the voices screaming in his head to let you go. He only barely noticed that you were touching yourself. Enjoying this treatment of you. That spurred him on. There was no stopping now. 
You let out soft moans, your eyes never once leaving him. He struggled to get himself to focus. To check for any signs you didn’t want this. But all he saw was you on the precipice of pleasure. The world disappeared. His house, Jackson, the darkness that lay beyond. It was all him now. He felt lighter, like he would float out through the window and everything he’d ever been through would disappear. Every ounce of goodness quietened down, the last shreds of his morality discarded with your dress. He grunted and moaned your name as he kept fucking you. Your features morphed into nothingness. No longer a face, no longer a human woman. All he knew was the ache in his body, the tightness that begged to be released. 
He slapped a hand against the wall as his thighs stiffened and every muscle in the vicinity of his cock tightened. He took himself back in his hand and stroked himself over your face. Once, twice, and thr– mid stroke, he growled and spilled on your face, coating your innocent features in sticky white cum. You flinched as the first stream hit, screwing your eyes shut. He wanted to make you look, see how he could defile you, show you that he wasn’t for you. Force you to confront what you’d allowed into your life so you’d run and never look back. 
But all he could do was keep stroking as he came down from his high. It was unlike anything he’d had in the recent past. Not his imagination, not just his hand. A real human woman who wasn’t just a convenience. One who sought him out, stripped for him, and let him use her face like a toy. 
He took a minute to collect his breath and let his senses return to him. His cock hung semi-hard outta his jeans, like it could go again if he willed it. Like it wasn’t almost six decades old. But he wasn’t too surprised. He could go again for the utterly debauched girl in front of him. Innocence eclipsed by milky white ropes of his cum. Without thinking twice, he grabbed your hair and pulled at it. You yelped, but let him pull you up from the ground and drag you to the other side of the room. 
He stopped you in front of his mirror, and slapped your hand off your pussy before replacing it with his. “Look at yourself. I fucking told you,” he said, forcing two thick fingers inside your cunt. You sucked him in with little resistance, your cunt leaking enough for him to force a third finger inside you. You gasped and tried to wriggle away, but he wasn’t having it. He was a fucking monster, but he would never leave a woman unsatisfied. Especially a young thing who’d never had anyone else before. 
He wrapped his free hand around your throat, his half hard cock begging him to go again when he felt the vibrations of your moans. “I warned you,” he whispered into your ear. “Fuckin’ warned you. Told you how starved I was. And you still taunted me. Look at you now!” 
“Please… Please, Joel! Sir, please…” 
“Fuckin’ slut. Maybe you ain’t really a virgin.” 
“I am, I am, I promise. I wa–” you cut yourself off with a gasp as he pressed his thumb on your clit. 
“What was that?” 
You made some incoherent noises, too far gone to form words. Yet you managed to thrust onto his fingers and roll your hips like a real natural. 
“Joel…” 
“I know, pretty girl… I know,” he cooed, the softness in his voice contradicting how he’d used you just minutes prior. Contradicting the cum on your pretty little face. 
“You gonna come for me? Give me another one after you came so sweetly on my fingers that day?” 
There were no answers from you. Not even an acknowledgement that you heard him. Just whines and moans as you let him support your entire weight. Your head lolled back on his shoulder and your eyes rolled back into your skull as he fucked you stupid with just his fingers. Oh the things he could do with his cock… Reach deeper, take the virginity you’d held on to for so long. If he ever had you, he would never let go. He was too selfish a man to willingly lose a girl so precious after taking her cunt. 
You gripped him like a vice, so tight he couldn't pry his fingers out. Something that vaguely sounded like his name spilled from your lips as you crumpled in his arms. Your pussy pulsated around you as he held you against him, unwilling to remove himself from you so quickly. 
He withdrew your panties from his pocket– the fresh pair you took off in his fucking hallways like it was no big deal. He wiped your face with it the same way he cleaned up your cunt that day. Instead of tucking it in his pocket, he forced it into your hand. 
“Put it on. Your fucking dress, too. Hope you learned you fucking lesson.”
As you put it on and scampered away naked into his hallways, he hoped it would be enough to scare you away. But he knew in his heart of hearts that he would always crave you like an addict craving a drink.
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starsinthesky5 · 4 months ago
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the one || joe burrow x reader
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description: once he found the one, he never planned on letting go
a/n: this is part 2 of down bad!!! thank you to the anon that wanted to see a part 2 and since she literally gave me the idea for a good chunk of this fic, a special shoutout to @joeys-babe! part 3 will be out soon!
also, i just wanted to say do the things that make you happy and not care about what anyone else says (as our boy has stated a few times). don’t let anyone’s opinions or words dictate what you can and can’t do, especially if they do not know you. do what makes you happy, ALWAYS! that has lowkey been my life motto for the longest time and those are my thoughts as I continue to write and enjoy my time on this app 💗 
okay back to the fic, this takes 2 years after the first part! so you and joe have been together for 2.5 years going on to 3 by now!
warnings: SMUT, language 
word count: 20 k
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“Fuck, you feel too good, baby,” you moaned as you closed your eyes and ran your nails along Joe’s muscular back, your pleasure rapidly building inside your sore body. 
“That’s it…that’s it, baby,” Joe moaned. “You’re doing so good,”. 
You and Joe had been wrapped up in bed for over an hour this evening, enjoying all this extra free time you two had together since it was off-season for Joe. You two were planning on spending the evening going through your shared closet and getting rid of things you didn’t need or use anymore, but that only lasted for about 10 minutes since Joe found a pair of new skimpy red lace panties you bought to surprise him later in the week. You could practically see the lust in his eyes as he pulled you right back to bed and you could feel it too because of the way he was going about it. 
“I’m gonna cum again,” you whined while opening your eyes and seeing Joe’s incredibly dark blue eyes filled with raw desire, his hand firmly placed on your waist as he rammed into your core, sending your body further up the bed and a prominent indent being visible in your lower belly because of him. You felt your orgasm building again for the 3rd time this evening and you were practically floating at this point. Joe's stamina was never to be questioned, but he was surprised that you could still keep going even after being so wrung out. 
“Shit..me too,” Joe panted as he dropped his head to the crook of your neck. “Fuck, you look so pretty under me like this…I can’t get enough of you, baby,” he moaned into your ear as he finished the sentence with a nip to your neck. He continued to moan and whimper in your ear, the sounds coming from his mouth literally making you lose all control and innocence. 
“J- Joe,” you whimpered as your legs started to shake, your eyes once again seeing stars. “Fuck..I need you harder,”.  
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he groaned as he felt your walls start to convulse around his thick shaft, your nails clawing at his back which was sure to leave a few red marks you’d take care of later. He started pounding into you with more intensity, making your moans come out in short gasps. 
“Baby, I-,” you hissed before you felt Joe crash his lips against yours, silencing your sounds of pleasure as he moved one of his hands down to your bundle of nerves. You placed a hand into his hair–lightly scratching his scalp in a way you knew he loved–and pulled him closer while his thumb fondled your aching clit. 
A few seconds later, you pulled away from his lips mid-kiss because you felt the imaginary band in your belly snap hard and another wave of pleasure washing over your tired body. “Ah, Joe,” you screamed for maybe the 100th time in the past hour. 
You felt your release soaking both of your lower halves as he kept pounding into your core, his rapid pace not slowing down even though you were experiencing the aftershocks of your orgasm and he was making it even more intense. 
“Joe…I C- Can’t…,” you whispered, your eyes screwing shut again as you arched up into him.
“I’ve got you, baby,” he whispered into your ear, his gentle hand sliding along your thigh and down to your calf as he pressed a few loving kisses to your flushed cheeks. A few seconds later, you heard him let out a soft grunt as he emptied himself inside of you, his warm cum coating your walls for the second time tonight yet the feeling was still so pleasing and fresh. 
After giving himself a few moments to regroup, he gently pulled out of you and crashed down right next to you on the bed, both of your bodies incredibly sweaty and covered in body fluids but still stuck to each other like glue. 
“That was hotttt,” Joe smiled as he pulled you into his chest and pulled a blanket over both your bodies after he noticed you shivering a bit because of the cold air hitting you. 
“Very. I don’t think I’ll be able to move for at least another hour,” you laughed as you kissed his chin. “I don’t know what we were thinking when we said we’d be productive this evening,”.
“I mean, we were pretty productive I would say,” Joe smirked. “If the task at hand was baby-making then we were definitely productive,”.
“Joe!” you shrieked, slapping his chest as he continued to laugh above you. 
“Kidding,” he added after he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “We can be productive another day. We deserve to have fun and do our thing without worrying about anything,”.
“Won’t argue with you about that one,” you breathed out while closing your eyes and snuggling up to him, his arm wrapping comfortably around you as you both just enjoy each other’s warmth. 
You both stayed like this for a little while longer, Joe tracing invisible shapes onto the soft skin of your back while you played with the wristbands on his other wrist, neither of you saying anything to the other.
Only when Joe spoke up.
“Soooo, earlier I may have booked us a trip to NYC for tomorrow night,” he so casually said to you, your head immediately lifting up from his chest as you were now face to face.
“What?” you asked, incredibly confused and surprised by what he said.
“Yeah,” he smiled at you while moving the falling hair out of your eyes. “We could use a little trip,”.
“To New York,” you said while raising an eyebrow. 
“Yes, to New York,” he slowly nodded.
“Any reason in particular? You didn’t even ask me about it like you usually do before planning a trip,” you said, slightly suspicious about the whole thing. Why did he want to go to New York for vacation out of all places? He could’ve picked Florida, Hawaii, or literally anywhere else to escape the coldish March weather. 
“Nope, no reason at all,” he lied while flashing you a smile.
Oh, there was a reason that’s for sure. Joe planned this spur-of-the-moment New York trip because he was going to propose to you this week, and you had no idea. He had known that you’d be his forever from the first time he laid his eyes on you, and your first conversation sealed the deal. From then on, every kiss, every date, every ‘I love you’, and every moment you spent together just made that ever more clear. Although you two hadn’t been together for a super long time, he knew that nothing could compare to the love you two shared–this was it. This is what many people spent years upon years searching for, some even being unable to find this type of connection. He was lucky enough to have found it so quickly and wasn’t planning on letting go of something so rare and priceless. You were the one for him and he had to make it official. 
He spent countless days trying to figure out when and where to do it since he had the ring made and in his safe for about a month and a half; he was growing restless by the minute because every idea he had was cliché or generic. He also hadn’t discussed this with any friends or family yet because he wanted this special moment to just be for you two, so he was completely on his own. He didn’t know what to do until yesterday, a photo popped up in his memories from your trip to New York–2 years ago to be specific–at your best friend Sophia’s Wedding. 
And that’s when it hit him.
This was the same place where Joe first mentioned your future together. 
This was the same place where he told you that he was going to marry you.
This is the same place where Joe was now going to propose to you and really make you the one. It all was going to come full circle. 
“I just thought to surprise you with the trip. I know you usually do the majority of the planning and stuff whenever we go somewhere but I wanted you to take the backseat this time,” he added.
“Okay,” you nodded. “But tomorrow night? What’s the rush?”.
The rush was that he physically could not wait any longer to put that beautiful ring on your finger and call you his fiancé. 
“No rush,” he lied again. “It’s just because we don’t have anything really going on this week so why wait,”.
You thought over it for a few seconds and felt that it would be nice to get away for a little bit and spend some time together outside of Ohio, and New York was one of your favorite spots to visit. And since Joe was planning it all, you could sit back and relax. You needed a break from life for a second and this was exactly what you craved. “I guess,” you giggled as you moved his tousled curls out of his eyes. 
“So, you down?” he asked, searching your tired eyes for a ‘yes’.
“You know I’m down for anything as long as I’m with you,” you lazily smiled before you leaned down to press a sweet kiss to his swollen lips. 
“I love you,” Joe smiled against your lips, your loving eyes staring deeply into his which were mirroring yours. It was finally going to happen, he was finally going to make you his forever. 
“I love you more,” you said while nuzzling your nose against his, his arms wrapping around your waist and his warm body cuddling you again. “I’m so excited,” you giggled as he smothered you with kisses. 
“Me too,” he grinned, internally laughing at how you had 0 idea how excited he really was. He had never been this excited to do something in his life. 
The Next Night - On the plane 
“I always love a good night flight,” you smiled as you got comfy in your seat after you and Joe shared a quick meal while the plane was taking off. 
“And that’s exactly why I called the Private Jet for this specific time,” he grinned as he brought over your wine glass and sat down next to you. 
“Thaank you,” you smiled as you took the glass from him, taking a small sip before handing it to him so he could take one as well. “Something about night flights is just so much more comforting and relaxing,”. 
“Mhm,” he nodded before swallowing the lush wine. “New York looks even better at night so I figured you’d like seeing the city from up here before we go further out and the lights are gone,”.
“Further out?” you asked as you turned your neck to look at him. “Are we not staying in the city?”. 
“Nope,” he grinned. “I got us an Airbnb in Winchester,”.
“...Winchester?” you asked, your brain struggling to remember why that sounded so familiar. You stayed quiet for a few seconds as you tried to recall where you’d heard that from, and Joe stayed quiet so you could figure it out on your own.“Wait, isn’t that the little town where Sophia got married?”.
“Yeah,” he laughed. “I remember you saying how much you liked it out there over the city because it was quieter and simpler,”.
“It’s soooo pretty,” you smiled as you closed your eyes and remembered how beautiful the town looked the last time you visited it. “It’s right by the lake, has tons of cute little shops but also all the luxury ones like the city does, and the energy is so romantic. Like rom-com romantic,” you blushed.
“Romantic?” Joe raised an eyebrow and asked. 
“Mhmmm,” you grinned while leaning your head on his shoulder. “Like the vibe is just so-,”.
“Romantic?” he smiled while finishing your sentence. 
“Yeah,” you shyly said. “I don’t know how to put it into words but it’s just so perfect and lovey. No wonder Sophia and Steven chose it as their wedding spot,”. 
“Mhm,” he hummed and hid his extremely big smile by wiping his mouth, trying very hard to not refer to it as your proposal spot. 
“Thanks for doing this, Joe,” you smiled up at him. “I feel like I needed this more than I thought,”.
“Of course, baby,” he said while kissing the side of your head and wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “It’s just you and me, just as it should be. No distractions, no outside noise, and definitely nothing around that can ruin this for us,”. 
“Our own little bubble of love. I loveeee it,” you said while leaning into him.
“Good, because I plan on staying in this bubble till I die,” he mumbled under his breath. 
“Hm?” you said because you heard him murmur something but couldn’t quite make it out. 
“Nothing,” he quickly shook his head and brushed off, his cheeks turning a little red since you almost heard what he said. You were about to say something because he was acting a little weird but before you could, he spoke up again. “I um..Do you remember our little yearly game challenge,” he quickly changed the topic so that you wouldn’t dig at the little moment that you just had.
“Listen, I know I lost last time, like really badly lost, but you don’t have to rub it in my face,” you scowled.
“I’m not rubbing it in your face, I just wanted to remind you that since I won, you have to do whatever I say for an entire day,” he smirked, this little condition a small part of tomorrow’s proposal plan. 
“Ugh, don’t remind me,” you groaned while stuffing your face in your hands. 
“By the way, I’m cashing in my ticket tomorrow so be prepared to do whatever I say,” he whispered in your ear. 
“Why tomorrow? We’re on vacation,” you groaned again. “I swear to god if you have me do some stupid shit-,”.
“Nothing stupid, I promise,” he grinned. “You’ll have fun and I’ll make it enjoyable,”.
“This game challenge was a bad idea. You always win and have too much power over me for 24 hours,” you shook your head. 
“Well, from what I remember, right now we’re pretty neck and neck,” he shrugged. “If you wanted to catch up, now is probably your chance. Unless, of course, you’re too lazy,” he teased. 
If there was one thing you hated being called, it was lazy. You never backed down from anything because you were too ‘lazy’ and Joe knew that which made this even more fun because he knew that being called ‘lazy’ woke something up inside of you. He found your competitive nature incredibly endearing, and he got to see it pretty early on in your relationship. He loved that he had someone who matched his competitive side, someone who didn’t mind silly shit-talking and was as goal-oriented as he was. 
You stared at him for a few moments, a fire building behind your eyes before you got up from your seat, “Where’s the Switch,” you grumbled while scrunching up your nose. 
“That’s my girl,” he grinned before he got up from his seat, dropped a loving kiss on your red cheeks, and grabbed his bag. You couldn’t help but smile even though you were getting your determined game face on, his sweet and soft attitude towards you always made you melt into a puddle of goo. 
The Next Day 
“Joe, where are we going?” you asked for the 3rd time as you looked over at him, but couldn’t see because of the blindfold around your eyes.
“It’s a secret, babe. You and your sexy self need to be patient” he grinned as he looked over at you, taking in how gorgeous you looked in the very expensive outfit he bought for you earlier. You both were doing some shopping earlier and Joe came in intending to find something for you to wear during the proposal but lied and said it was for tonight’s special dinner so you wouldn’t ask questions. He picked out a very gorgeous but very expensive vintage floral dress for you to wear, a matching pair of vintage Prada heels with a matching handbag, and even bought you another gold necklace from the jewelers next door to tie it all together. You refused to let him spend this much money on you, but he reminded you that you had to do anything he asked for 24 hours, so you had to comply with his wishes of buying you all this. 
After shopping your lives away, he made you go to the Spa with him. You were very confused as to why he made you both go to the Spa since that was never Joe’s scene, but this was his way of making you get a fresh set of nails and a nice facial treatment without it being too suspicious. Since this New York trip was super last minute, you didn’t have any time to get anything done and he knew that you’d be on his ass if you took engagement photos with a bad manicure and slightly dull skin, so he made sure you got everything done. You were going to go with light blue nails, but once again you had to do everything he said, and Joe wanted you to get white chrome nails. You didn’t ask why he wanted that specific color because you were too busy laughing at how silly he looked with a green mud mask on, but it was because it was the perfect color to mesh with the engagement ring he had made for you. 
Then once you got everything wrapped up at the Spa, you went back to the Air BnB and got ready for the ‘dinner’ Joe was taking you to. You were finishing your makeup before you felt Joe come up behind you in his baby blue sweater, wrapping his arms around you, swaying you from side to side, telling you how beautiful you looked. You spent a few moments like this, whispering little words of love to each other and passing typical flirtatious comments before Joe pulled out a blindfold from his pocket. 
“Why the blindfold?” you furrowed your eyebrows and asked. “You trying to kidnap me or something?” you joked. 
“Do you trust me?” he asked with a smile.
“Of course, I trust you, my to-be kidnapper,” you giggled as you leaned back into his arms. 
“Then let me put it on,” he whispered in your ear while running his hand along your arm, your body heating up from his electric touch. 
“Why?” you breathed out, his hand moving up to cup your shoulder, the pad of his thumb lightly brushing against the nape of your neck.
“It’s a surprise. Can’t say,” he smiled as he opened up the blindfold and met your eyes in the mirror, looking for some sort of response. You gave him a small nod and let him wrap the blindfold around your eyes. You didn’t really have a choice because you had to do whatever he said but you also didn’t ask too many questions, mostly because he wouldn’t answer any of them but also because you enjoyed a good surprise. 
“I know it’s a secret but I’m getting impatient,” you frowned as you snapped back to the present. You did enjoy a good surprise, but the anticipation was killing you. “You got me all dressed up and even took me to the Spa–which might I add–is the least Joe Burrow-like activity on the planet, and I’m a little suspicious right now truth be told,”.
“Am I not allowed to pamper my fian-..girlfriend?” Joe said, his eyes widening at the fact that he almost called you his fiancé. 
“You are,” you laughed, Joe letting out a relieved breath because it sounded like you didn’t hear him slip up. “I just thought you’d have me do other stuff and not stuff that was catered to me since I have to do whatever you say for the whole day,”
“Other stuff? Like what?” he snickered as he looked out onto the road, the Wedding Venue where Sophia got married and where Joe was proposing getting closer and closer. 
“Hmm, I don’t know. Maybe giving you super sloppy world-class head or making you pumpkin pie while only wearing an apron and no clothes underneath,” you chuckled.
“Well, the day isn’t over yet,” he smirked. “Maybe I’ll ask for those two later tonight,”.
“Now that sounds more like you,” you laughed. “But seriously, where are you taking me that requires a blindfold,”.
“You’ll see, we’re almost there,” he smiled, his heart rate picking up once he realized that this was really happening and wasn’t just a dream. 
A few minutes later, you had made it to the Winchester Country Club. Joe had rented out the entire event space for the day so that you two could have all the privacy you needed for this special and intimate moment. He had the staff set up the same ballroom where Sophia had her reception–and where he first mentioned your future together–with various candles and flowers lining the dance floor while there were rose petals scattered around in the middle. He even made sure that they hooked up the sound system so that he could play a special song while all of this was going down. It was picture-perfect, all of it. He was going to make you the one where it all really started for you both, where you first got a taste of what the years to come would be like. 
Joe turned the car off and took a few deep breaths to calm his growing nerves before looking over at your clueless yet adorable face, a big smile on it as you unbuckled your seat belt and turned to face him. 
“Are we here?” you eagerly asked as you attempted to find his forearm but couldn’t see so you were doing a bad job.
“We are,” he smiled while grabbing your hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. 
“So I can take this off?” you asked as you reached to untie the blindfold.
“No!” Joe quickly moved your hand down and said. “I need you to keep it on for a bit longer,”. 
“You’re so kidnapping me,” you giggled. 
“Would it be so bad though?” he teased as he opened his door and slid out of his seat, quickly closing it and jogging over to your side to let you out and finish your conversation.
“Not really,” you laughed as he opened your door and you struggled to find where he was standing since you couldn’t see a thing. “I would have the sexiest kidnapper in the world and probably receive the best treatment a hostage could get,”. 
“Exactly,” he shrugged as he grabbed your hand and carefully helped you out of the car. Being blindfolded was not easy because you were either one step away from falling on your face or one step away from going the wrong way. He made sure you got down carefully and closed your door for you before taking another deep breath and grabbing your hand. “You trust me, right?” he asked again, his nerves settling in now. 
“Where was this coming from?” you thought to yourself. This was now the second time he asked you this and it was adding to your suspicion along with the blindfold, expensive outfit, and spa treatments, that something was up. 
“More than anyone in the world,” you smiled as you pulled his hand up and pressed a soft kiss to it. 
“Okay,” he sighed. “Let’s go,” he said while leading you inside hand in hand. You let Joe lead you to what felt like a building of some sort, the whiff of warm air confirming that you weren’t outside anymore. 
You were walking for a little bit and felt that you were turning corners and entering other rooms. A few moments later, you stopped walking and you heard a few noises that sounded like a door opening, and then you were walking again.
You heard the door close behind you and Joe let go of your hand, his eyes scanning the room as he took in the fairytale-like set up which was just as he imagined. “Wow,” he mumbled to himself before he looked down at you, his heart rate picking up and his palms getting sweaty. 
“Come on, Joe. You got this. She loves you and she’s going to say yes,” Joe thought to himself, giving himself a mental pep talk. 
This was it. 
“You gonna let me see now or is there something else?” you laughed as you continued to look forward. Joe didn’t say anything in response, instead, he just untied the blindfold around your eyes and slipped the silky band off. 
Your eyes slowly adjusted to the dimly lit room, your heart stopping as you looked around and saw that you were standing at the foot of a ballroom floor that was lined with lit candles and flowers, a plethora of rose petals scattered across the middle. “Joe..where are we?” you said, your voice just short of a whisper as you looked up at him, taking note of his crinkled eyes and charming smile.
“The Country Club,” he said while he reached into his pocket and tapped the play button. A few seconds later, the starting tune of “Can’t Help Falling In Love” by Elvis Presley filled the ballroom. 
“Why are we-,” you began to say before he grabbed your hand and led you out to the middle of the dance floor.
“Dance with me first,” he said as he stopped you both in the center and placed his hands on your waist. “This is our song, it would be a shame to pass up on a chance to dance to it,” he said while pulling you closer to him.
“That is true,” you agreed while looping your arms around his neck, Joe began to sway you both back and forth while looking deeply into your soft eyes. “Whatever this is, I already love you for it,” you said while threading your fingers through his hair. 
“That’s really good to hear,” he smiled, as you placed your cheek against his chest and melted into him. Joe couldn’t believe that this was happening, he was just a few moments away from one of the most important moments in his life. He was a little nervous, to say the least, but he knew that you loved him more than anything in the world and there was a higher chance you would say ‘yes’ than ‘no’. You wanted this just as much as he did and if you didn’t, then you would show it. 
You spent a few quiet moments dancing around to the song that you both held incredibly close to your heart before Joe ended the dance by giving you a little twirl and pulling you right back into him after, a little gasp leaving your lips because of the strong movement from him.
“I can’t help falling in love with you,” he said, his face just inches from yours. “And that’s why I have to do this,”. 
“Do what?” you giggled.
“Do you know where we are right now?” Joe asked as he moved his hands from your waist to entwine your fingers, holding your hands as he started his little speech. 
“The Country Club,” you nodded, Joe staying quiet as he expected a more specific answer. “…The place where Sophia got married,” you added as you looked around and recognized the familiar surroundings. 
“Mhm,” he nodded, taking another deep breath to compose himself.
“Joe, why are we here?” you asked again, a little more serious this time as you noticed his tense body and felt his slightly sweaty palms. 
“Do you remember what we talked about at the Wedding? Specifically what we talked about on this dance floor while we danced to the same song?”.
Of course, you remembered what you talked about that night, you couldn’t forget it even if you tried. It was the first time he mentioned your future together, as more than just boyfriend/girlfriend. 
“Yeah,” you swallowed. “I do,” you said as you felt a warm feeling fill your body. 
“I wanted to bring you back here for that specific reason,” he began to say. “This was the first place where I told you how I felt about our future together. Where I told you I wanted to marry you. This was where I had to do this,”.
“Holy. Shit.” you thought to yourself. “Was he actually about to do this?”. 
“Y/N, I love you more than words can describe. These past two years have literally been the best years of my life because of you. You lit my world on fire when you first walked in, and from the first moment I saw you, I was already so down bad for you,”. 
Flashback to when you first met - Offseason 2.5 years ago 
“Y/N, we need you! He’s here,” your boss yelled as you were prepping the dressing room.
“Coming!” you yelled back as you finished setting up the room with snacks and the wardrobe for the shoot. This was just another part of your job working in PR–setting up the room for brand shoots for your guests. 
You looked everything over again to make sure that nothing was lacking, which obviously it wasn’t because you were amazing at your job. “I’m too good,” you grinned to yourself as you quickly turned around on your heels and walked out to the main area. 
Joe was talking to a few of the staff for the shoot today before he heard your boss speak up. “Ah, there she is,” he said while throwing his hands up. “Our miracle worker!”.
“I’m flattered,” you laughed as you walked over to everyone, Joe’s eyes darting toward the adorable laugh that echoed throughout the room. 
The first time Joe looked at you, it felt like the world shifted, just enough to make everything around him blur into the background. When you walked into the room, your presence commanded attention without even trying and the air around you shimmered with something magical. His heart skipped a beat, caught off guard by the sudden pull he felt toward you. 
His eyes met yours for a brief, electrifying moment, and in that instant, it was like a spell had been cast over him. All he could focus on was you, your smile, the way you moved with effortless grace and the way you lit up the entire room. It wasn’t just your beauty that captivated Joe; it was something deeper, something that resonated with his soul. 
The way you laughed and smiled, the way your hair bounced around while you moved, the way you just seemed so utterly yourself–it was all so enchanting. It didn’t take him long to realize that he didn’t want to break free from whatever spell you had unknowingly cast on him. He was completely and utterly mesmerized by you, and you were all he wanted to think about. 
“I’m Y/N,” you said to him, breaking him free from the trance he was in. 
He looked down and saw that you were now standing in front of him, his heart skipping another beat because of how close you were to him. “I’m- I’m Joe,” he nervously said.
“Oh, I know,” you smirked. “You’re pretty well known to say the least,”. 
“Y/N will be your best friend today, Joe. She’ll help you get ready, answer any questions, and basically be stuck by your side while we film today,”.
“I’m a lucky guy,” Joe laughed while rubbing his neck. 
“That you are,” you chimed in. “Follow me, I’ll show you your room for today,” you smiled as you turned around, your smile dropping once he couldn’t see your face anymore.
“Why was he looking at me like that?” you thought to yourself, his heated gaze incredibly noticeable. His beautiful blue eyes were stuck on you the entire time and that made a cloud of butterflies appear in your stomach. You shook your head and snapped out of it, “Focus, Y/N. That’s Joe Burrow. He probably looks at every girl that way for this exact reason–he likes to see them fawn over him,”.
“So, this is basically your house for today,” you awkwardly joked as you led him into the glamorous room. 
“Wow,” he said as his eyes scanned over everything. “And this was all done by you?”.
“Mhm,” you nodded while closing the door behind you. “Also, after the shoot, you can keep whatever you want in this room. Except for the furniture obviously, but the clothes, snacks, and accessories are all yours,”. 
“What about you? Do I get to keep you too?” he looked over at you with a cheeky grin and said. 
“Sorry, I’m off limits,” you winked.  
“Damn, that sucks because I think out of everything in this room, you’re the most appealing,” he flirted. 
You raised an eyebrow, amused at his boldness. “You’re trouble,” you laughed.
“Are you gonna arrest me?” he smirked while raising his hands. 
“We’ll see. I’ll give you the rest of the day before I make a decision,” you said as you felt yourself getting lost in his captivating baby-blue eyes. Something about his eyes was pulling you in, it was as if you wanted to get to know what was behind them and he was going to let you. 
“I’m gonna go back out there and look over the first set of shots we’re doing of you. The stylist and hair/makeup person should be coming in a few minutes,” you said as you felt his heated gaze traveling over your body, your breath hitching in your throat when you saw him lean in close to you, his arm brushing against yours. 
He reached to the side of you, twisting the doorknob and opening the door for you, “Thank you,” he whispered into your ear before pulling back and meeting your eyes again, seeing a spark behind them that you were trying to hide; but why were you trying to hide it?
You stared at him for a few quiet seconds before giving him a shy nod and quickly leaving the room, closing the door behind you as you pressed your back against the door. All it took was one look from him to leave you breathless. No man has ever been able to make you feel like this with just a look. 
“I’m so fucking screwed,” you whispered to yourself, a blush creeping up your face. 
About 20 minutes later, you walked back into Joe’s room and saw that he was getting ready for the shoot. Your eyes traveled down his body as you took in his outfit, “Mm, this is all wrong,” you shook your head, everyone in the room looking over at you.
“Why?” the stylist asked. 
You walked over to Joe, “The colors are clashing with his complexion. The tan just blends in with his skin and those necklaces aren’t popping either,” you said while touching his shoulder, your gentle touch sending shivers down his spine as he looked up at you from his chair. 
“I think I can fix this. Everyone, out. I’ll bring him out in a few minutes,” you ordered, everyone nodding and leaving the room. 
“Damn, they didn’t hesitate to leave,” he laughed. 
You walked over to the clothing racks and looked over the variety of available clothes, “I take my job very seriously and they all know that our boss calls me the miracle worker for a reason. I can’t have you going out there looking like a tan bandage,” you giggled as you pulled out a plain black tank top, baggy black jeans, and a white and black letterman jacket. 
Joe stood up from the chair and stood next to you, “Here, put these on,” you said while handing him the clothes. “I’ll look at the chains and necklaces and see what I can do,” you nodded as you moved around him and went back to the vanity. 
Joe took the clothes and moved to the middle of the room, slowly peeling his clothes off as you remained unbothered and looked down at the chains. There was no other room for him to go into and change as the bathroom was like a broom closet, so he had to get changed right there. 
“Oo, this one looks good,” you said as you picked up a chain and turned around, your body freezing once you saw him standing there with no shirt and just his boxers on. 
Your eyes were glued to his chest, a warm feeling taking over your body again as you looked at his perfectly crafted tan frame. “Fuck, why does he have to be so hot,” you thought to yourself. 
Your eyes widened at the thought you just had before Joe spoke up, “Uhh, my bad,” he said, still standing there half-naked.
“I..I..uh,” you stuttered. “You’re good, that’s on me,” you stuttered again as your eyes traveled down his body to his pelvis, your breath hitching in your throat as you saw something you’d never thought you’d see.
“Give me a few seconds,” Joe said as he quickly put everything on. 
“Take all the time you need,” you blushed as you kept your head down and turned around, Joe’s gaze stuck on you the entire time he was changing. He wanted to touch you so badly–feel your plump pink lips against his and your manicured hands scratching down his back. But equally, he wanted to get to know you. He wanted to peel off your clothes but also to peel you like an onion, peeling back each layer and getting to know you on a deeper level than what he saw on the surface. 
The rest of the shoot went like this as well, he just couldn’t take his eyes off of you. You stayed where he was the entire day as you said you would, so his eyes would instantly move over to you after every shot since you were right next to the camera. You even caught him staring at you a few times, each time thinking that he’d stop but he wouldn’t. You even found your gaze lingering on him when he wasn’t looking. You couldn’t help it, he looked insanely good. And he noticed, of course. Each time you stared at him for longer than normal, he could feel it. 
You wondered what about you made him so unfocused and distracted, unable to figure out if it was because there was something wrong with you or if he just wanted to get in your pants for a quick hookup and this was his way of drawing you in. You didn’t say anything to him about it because you tried to remain professional, but also because you thought that maybe the answer when you asked him wasn’t something you wanted to hear. 
Until the end of the shoot came around, delaying the inevitable wasn’t working anymore. If you weren’t going to say something, Joe sure was. 
“So…,” he cleared his throat and spoke up as you were looking through a few of the shots in his dressing room with him. “Thanks for helping me out today with everything. You’re really good at all this. Not just PR and work stuff, but also keeping me entertained,” he said as he looked over at you. 
In between shots and filming, you two actually had a few great conversations with each other. You talked about how you got involved in PR, and your thoughts on football–telling him that you lived and breathed football and had been since you were little so this was pretty fun for you, then talked about your favorite season which for both of you was fall which then led to you two bonding over your mutual fondness for pumpkin pie, and then talked a little about your likes and dislikes. 
Joe got to see your humorous side as well, he even lost count of how many times you had made him laugh. He also saw a little bit of your nerdy and brainy side, a dichotomy to the stupid jokes you made. You were quite literally perfect in every aspect, the most flawless person he had ever met. Each time you talked, Joe saw a little sparkle in your eyes; a sparkle that he wanted to never stop seeing now that he had been exposed to it. Every time you opened your mouth to talk, he got lost in your eyes, and that drove him crazy. 
“I’m a woman of many talents,” you grinned. “Also, I didn’t mind because you’re actually a pretty cool guy,”.
“You sound surprised?” Joe said, acting like he was offended. 
You were opening your mouth to say something, but all that came out was a soft laugh. “It’s just...the things I hear about you and how great and normal you are outside of football, I didn’t really believe it?”.
“Really?” Joe said, sitting up in his seat and rubbing his hands on his thighs out of nervousness. “Why is that?”.
“I just….you’re this millionaire quarterback who has the looks, the brains, the athletic ability, and all the money. That’s the formula for a Playboy douchebag but the way you portray yourself to the public doesn’t align with that. I just thought it was a front for your brand and image, but today’s showed me that it’s not,” you said. “You’re a pretty cool person,”.
While Joe got to see a bit of your personality, you got to see the same from him too; and the part you saw, you loved. He was funny, grounded, and legitimately a caring person. Whether it was him talking about his football journey or talking about his silly interests–he laid himself bare and was fully honest about himself. 
“Go on a date with me,” Joe blurted out, that being the only thought in his head for the past hour.  
You flinched when you heard him say that, your heart dropping from your chest all the way to your feet, “Woahh, I know I said you’re a cool person but I never said that I-,”.
“I know. And I’m probably being way too blunt right now but I want to go on a date with you. Like really bad,”.
“You don’t even know if I have a boyfriend or not,” you huffed, entertained by his confidence. 
“With the way you were looking at me during the shoot, either you don’t or you have a wandering eye,” he laughed. 
“Fuck, he saw me? This is so embarrassing,” you thought to yourself. 
“Don’t think I didn’t see the amount of times you were staring at me too. Way more than the times I looked at you,” you said, flipping it back onto him to hide your embarrassment. 
“That’s because I want you,” he blurted out again, this newfound confidence coming out of nowhere. He had never been this straightforward with a girl, especially a girl he had just met. You were special. 
Your eyebrows felt like they shot up to the roof, “You’re very forward, aren’t you?” you laughed. 
“Only when I’m serious about something,” he nodded. 
He’s just trying to get in your pants right? No way he was really interested in you. “Joe, you’re sweet, super flirty, but sweet. But I don’t think this is a good idea,” you sighed. 
“Not a good idea? Who were you trying to please? You’re not some angel saint, this Greek god-like man literally said he wants you. What the fuck are you doing? Jump his bones already!” your subconscious said. 
“Why not?” Joe crossed his arms and asked. 
“I mean, I don’t even know you and-,”.
“That’s what first dates are for,” he interrupted.
“Okay, but I’m just a normal girl and you’re this hotshot Quarterback. You could have anyone you wanted so why-,”.
“You’re perfect, like insanely perfect in every aspect and not just your looks. I don’t want anyone else,” he interrupted again. 
“How do I know you’re not just looking for a quick hookup? You are an athlete after all and-,”.
“Don’t judge a book by its flashy cover,” he interrupted, again. “Get to know me. The real me. You got a sneak peek of the real me today. He wasn’t so bad, was he?”. 
You were speechless. He had an answer for every doubt you had and he was oh-so persistent. 
You looked down at your hands, fidgeting with the rings on your fingers because you didn’t know what to say. You wanted to peel his onion and get to know him, but you were scared that if you did, it would leave you in tears–and not the good kind. Even though you’d only spent a few hours with him, he made it memorable and special. The conversations you two had were as if you were just two old friends catching up, not as if you were two strangers who had just met. He had this aura around him that was pulling you in even though you were trying to hold back. 
Joe saw your uncertain facial expression and scooted closer to you, lifting your chin with his hand to meet his eyes. “Listen, go on one date with me. Just one. If you don’t leave with a smile on your face and a warm feeling in your heart, I’ll leave you alone. We can pretend like it never happened,”.  
“....Really? You’d do that, leave me alone? You’re pretty stubborn so…,” you giggled. 
“Very funny, Y/N,” he rolled his eyes. “But yeah, I would. I hope I don’t have to because there’s something about you that just draws me in and it’s not just how beautiful you are. I don’t know what it is, but it’s like a magnetic pull and I felt it the first time I looked at you,”.
“You have a way with words,” you smiled. 
“I’m serious though. I want to get to know you, if you’ll let me,” he added, the seriousness in his voice making you feel less nervous about the situation. 
You bit your lip and thought over his offer for a few seconds. “It can’t be that bad? He seems really sweet, respectful (but flirty as fuck), and is acting like he genuinely likes you. Not every guy is looking for a quick fuck and he was right, don’t judge a book by its flashy cover. You peeled a layer of his onion so far and you liked what you saw, you should keep peeling because it probably gets better and not worse. Right?” your subconscious said. “This could be different. You never know unless you try,”.
“Fine. I’ll go on a date with you,” you said while you looked back up at him, his eyes filled with desire and curiosity. 
“Perfect,” he beamed, mentally doing a little dance because he got you to agree. “I’ll swing by tomorrow after you’re wrapped up here and take you out to the best first–maybe last–date possible,”.
“I’m counting on it,” you nodded. You weren’t sure why you were giving him a chance, but it felt right for some reason. This was either the worst decision you’ve ever made in your life or the best decision you’ve ever made in your life. 
Oh, and Joe made sure that it was the best decision you’d ever made in your life. The date was quite literally perfect. He was quite literally perfect. 
And given how well it went, it wasn’t your last date. It was the first of many, many exciting and special dates. 
You left that first date just as he thought you would–with a smile and a warm feeling radiating throughout your body; but also with another feeling.
A feeling of intrigue. 
You wanted to get to know him just as much as he wanted to get to know you. You wanted to get to know him more than you already had during your date. 
You wanted to get to know Joe in every single way possible.  
End of flashback 
“I was stubborn as fuck and even though you were hesitant, you still agreed to go on one date with me. I came into that date nervous and awkward as hell because I was scared that you wouldn’t enjoy it and that you didn’t feel the same spark that I did, but I was wrong. We left that date hand in hand, laughing until our stomachs hurt, with your head on my shoulder, and with your name carved in on my heart. You peeled my whole onion in one date and nobody has ever been able to do that. That was the moment I knew that you’d be the one. I swear I fell in love with you the moment I saw you and that date made me double down on those feelings. You’re kind, compassionate, and the most stunning woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on. You never fail to make me laugh, you’re always finding new ways to make me fall even more in love with you, and you’re exactly what I picture when I think about my forever person. You’re exactly what I needed in my life; with you, there are no empty spaces. My entire world is complete because of you,”.
You felt tears pool in your eyes as he continued talking, “Joe-,” you sobbed.
“I’m not done, yet,” he laughed. “I’ve thought about this moment every day since that Wedding. The thought of you being the one makes my heart hurt, in a good way obviously. I physically can’t live without you, everything I do is for you. I live for you, I love for you, I burn for you, Y/N. It’s all for you,”.
“He’s perfect. He literally cannot get more perfect. I love him so much,” you thought to yourself.
“I brought you back here to this special spot so I could do this,” he said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a red velvet box. He got down on one knee in front of you, the sobs getting harder as he opened the box and showed you the gorgeous princess-cut diamond ring. 
“Princess Cut. He remembered,” you thought to yourself, tears streaming down your cheeks like a river breaking through a dam, fast and uncontrollable. 
Your heart was about to beat out of your chest, he was actually about to do it. He was about to do the one thing that you had dreamed about for as long as you could remember. “You’re the one, Y/N. You always have been, and you always will be. Will you marry me and let me be the one for you?” he said as he opened the box and looked up into your eyes, his glossy with a few tears.
“You already are, Joe. You’ve always been the one,” you choked out as you cupped his face. “You’ve been the one since the day we met. Yes, I’ll marry you,” you smiled through your sobs.
Joe’s entire soul lit up when you said that, fireworks set off inside his body as he took the ring out of the box and slipped it onto your ring finger. “I love you, Y/N,” he choked out as you crouched down and pulled him in close for a tight hug, tucking his head into your neck and rubbing his neck as you felt a few tears from him drip down onto your shoulder. 
“I love you, Joe. I love you so fucking much,” you smiled as tears slid down your face. You moved his head out from your neck, cupping his adorable face and pulling him in for a kiss, a kiss that quickly became heated. 
“Whew, gotta hit the brakes, we’re still in public,” you giggled as you ran your thumb under his eye. 
“Who cares,” he smiled as he moved his hands down to cup your ass and chased your lips for another kiss, planting a few around your cheek before ending at your lips.  “Wait,” he said as he pulled away. “You didn’t just say ‘yes’ because of the fact that you have to do whatever I say for a whole day, right?”. 
“Are you kidding?” you broke out laughing. “I would say ‘yes’ solely because of that condition even if I didn’t actually want to willingly marry you. I said ‘yes’ because I wanted to, not because I was forced to. However, I wouldn’t complain if I was forced? Being married to you either way sounds like the best thing ever,”. 
“Mmm, I love you,” Joe mumbled as he pulled you in for another kiss. 
“So,” he said as he pulled away and kissed your right cheek. “Fucking,” he said as he kissed your left cheek. “Much,” he said as he kissed your nose. “Mrs. Burrow,” he said as he ended the sentence with another kiss on your soft lips. 
“Ooo, I like that name,” you giggled. 
“Yeah?” he asked with a laugh.
“Mhm, and I love you, Mr. Burrow,” you smiled against his lips. 
One month later - Las Vegas, Nevada 
 “Woo, we had a little too much to drink tonight,” you giggled as you and Joe stumbled into your hotel suite. 
“What do you mean? I feel amaaaazing,” Joe drunkenly laughed as he let go of your hip and set you down on the couch before plopping down next to you. 
“Leave it to us to get fucked up within 5 hours of being in Vegas,” you rolled your eyes while slipping your heels off. 
You and Joe had been in LA for the past week for some of Joe’s offseason training & brand sponsorships and decided to end your visit to the West Coast with a trip to Las Vegas for a few days. You had gotten to your hotel around mid-afternoon and immediately got changed and went out, first attending a classic Vegas magic show but not before you tricked Joe into thinking you bought Magic Mike tickets instead and his reaction was priceless. 
Flashback to earlier 
“What the fuck do you mean you got Magic Mike tickets,” Joe said, his jaw practically on the floor. 
“That means, I got us Magic Mike tickets,” you smirked as you slipped on a sparkly black skintight short dress. “Front Row too,”. 
You could practically see the steam coming off of Joe’s face, his cheeks turning a shade of red you had only seen a few times; times when he got jealous. “Absolutely not,” Joe grumbled as he grabbed your wrist and spun you around so that you were facing him and not the mirror. 
“Why not?” you said with a furtive grin, his grip on your wrist sending chills down your spine. 
“Because,” Joe said while motioning at you with his free hand. 
“Words, baby. I can’t read minds,” you laughed.
“Because I don’t want half-naked men ogling at my sexy fiance right in front of me,” he snarled. “Especially when she’s wearing a dress that’s showing off too much cleavage for public view,”.
“So it’s okay if they do it not in front of you,” you said, perking up and flashing him a full tooth smile. “Because I can go alone,” you shrugged. 
“What? No,” Joe chirped. “I don’t want any half-naked men ogling at you, not in front of me or behind my back,”.
“But Joeee,” you whined. “It’ll be fun,”.
“Please, I cannot believe he actually thinks I want to go to a Magic Mike show,” you thought to yourself. 
“Y/N, no man needs to be giving you a lap dance in front of your to-be husband. No man needs to be giving you a lap dance period,” he said, his voice laced with sternness. 
“What if I want them to,” you said while crossing your arms from displeasure. 
“What,” Joe said, his jaw falling to the ground again as his eyebrows shot up. 
“Yeah,” you nodded. “You can get eye-fucked by every girl that’s in your vicinity and I never say anything. Maybe I want a few guys to do the same to me without your objection,”. 
When the words left your mouth, you saw his jaw clench and the veins on his arm pop, “Oh fuck, he’s mad mad,” you thought to yourself.  
“Am I not enough?” Joe asked, the tension in the room now so thick you could cut it with a knife. 
“Joe, I-” you began to say. 
“No, seriously. Is my attention not enough that you need random sweaty men in skimpy outfits to make you feel good?” he said while crossing his arms at his chest, a pose that signaled that he was upset. “If you want that kind of attention, why are we even engaged? Why are you even with me? Being single and being as gorgeous as you are can get you all of that kind of attention you so clearly want,”. 
Your smile dropped as you could practically feel in your soul how this joke didn’t sit well with him through his voice. Joe was a pretty sensitive guy even if he didn’t show it and this joke clearly made him feel pretty awful because he was saying these things he normally would never say.  
You looked up and walked closer to him, cupping his face with your hands as he refused to look at you in the eyes. “Hey, Hey, look at me,” you softly said as you tilted his head back to look at you. “I’m just kidding, Joey,” you said, your softened eyes telling him that you were being truthful. 
“W- What?” he choked out.
“It’s a prank…a really dumb prank, but a prank. There are no Magic Mike tickets and there are no men that I want eye-fucking me, other than you obviously,” you laughed. “I was just messing with you. I got us the David Copperfield tickets at MGM like we talked about,”. 
“You’re serious?” he hesitantly asked. 
“So serious. I’m sorry I made you feel like you weren’t enough. You are more than enough for me, more than I can honestly handle,” you winked, earning a soft chuckle from him.
“Sorry I got so worked up over that,” he shook his head as he placed his hands on your hips, the pad of his thumb rubbing the sparkly fabric. “I just don’t want anything ruining this, even if it’s some rando Vegas stripper getting too close to you because it’s part of the show,”. 
“Nothing is ruining this,” you said while looping your arms around his neck. “I’m here with you, and only you. My to-be husband, my favorite person in the world, my bestest friend–don’t tell Sophia I said that, and the sexiest person alive. I don’t need random men to make me feel good when I have you,” you said while scratching his scalp. 
“You make me feel good,” you smiled. “In every,” you whispered as you pressed a wet kiss to the corner of his lips. “Single,” you whispered as you planted a few kisses on his cheek. “Way,” you whispered as you pulled away and looked him in the eyes. “Possible,” you whispered before you crashed your lips against his. 
End of flashback 
After a quick makeout sesh, you both went to the magic show and then hit up a few clubs along The Strip, which was the reason you were both completely out of your senses. The alcohol and hint of weed in both your systems were really pushing you both onto a different planet. 
“It was worth it though,” Joe shrugged. “I had the time of my life watching you struggle to drink all the Jello Shots by yourself,”.
“And that is the last time I make a bet against you,” you sighed.
“Let this be a reminder to never make a bet about anything sports-related against an actual athlete,” he slurred as he got up from the couch to walk over to the mini-kitchen and grab you both some water. 
You got up right after him, following him into the kitchen as you started fiddling with the fabric of your dress which was scratching against your skin and making you incredibly uncomfortable. You hopped up onto the counter as Joe opened the fridge and pulled out two bottles, his eyes navigating towards you as you were pulling down the straps of your dress.
“What’re you doing?” he laughed as he set the bottles next to you.
“Trying to get the hell out of this dress,” you whined, an idea popping up into your head when you glanced over at him. You reached out for his hand and pulled him over to you, spreading your legs open to accommodate his large body, allowing him to step in between them. “Maybe you could help me?” you smirked as you pulled him down for a kiss.
His veiny hands settled on your waist as you leaned back, your hands cupping his cheeks as your lips moved against each other in a sensual tango. You both had so much pent-up energy from your activities earlier and going out tonight made it even worse. Joe’s eyes were glued to you the entire time at the clubs you went to, even though you two were stuck to each other’s side the whole time anyway. You just looked so insanely good that the only thoughts in his brain were ones he would get slapped for if he said them in public. 
Everything about you was sending him into overdrive tonight; the way your dress hugged your body in all the right spots, the way your hair bounced each time you laughed, the way your beautiful eyes would look into his, the way your soft pink lips were curled into a smile the entire night, and the way you were stuck to him like glue–reminding everyone in the room that he was all yours. 
His eyes were also glued to the massive diamond ring on your ring finger, a constant reminder that you were all his. 
But that ring being a reminder wasn’t enough. He couldn’t wait to make you all his. 
“Mm, Joe,” you moaned into the kiss, the taste of alcohol lingering on his tongue which made the kiss more intoxicating. “Fuck, I need you,” you whispered against his lips as he pulled away. Those words usually ignited a fire within Joe that couldn’t be burned out until you two ended up naked in bed after spending a good amount of time partaking in certain activities, but this time those words seemingly didn’t do anything. 
“Let’s get married tomorrow night,” Joe blurted out as he looked into your eyes with nothing but a look of raw desire and excitement.
You stared at him like he had two heads, breaking out into a fit of laughter a few seconds later. “Oh my god, you’re funny,” you laughed while pulling him back to you using the collar of his shirt, attaching your lips to his for another kiss before he abruptly pulled away.
“Y/N, I’m not kidding,” he said.
“Joe, you’re drunk. We’re both very drunk,” you giggled as you rubbed his cheek. 
“I know, but I’m sober enough to know that I want to marry you tomorrow,” he said, turning serious as he pulled away from you. 
You hopped off of the counter and stood in front of him, still not being able to take him seriously. “Can we talk about this later? Why don’t we go to bed and finish talking about some other things first,” you said while running your hands up his chest and cupping his big shoulders. 
“Nope. We’re getting married tomorrow night which means we have to abstain from having sex so that the first time we do as a married couple is special,” he said, stepping back from you. 
You think he’s just messing with you like you were earlier, so you decide to play along and tease him to hopefully break his front. Since you were out of your mind drunk, there was no logic available in your brain to stop you. You quickly yank off your dress and are left standing in front of him in your matching bra and black lace panties, his breath hitching in his throat as the tent in his pants grows at the sight of your gorgeous body.
“You sure about that?” you said while raising an eyebrow, knowing that he could never resist putting his hands on you when you were half-naked in front of him. 
“Yeah,” he cleared his throat and said, “I’m sure,”. 
“Okay, but you can’t be so sure when you’re sitting next to me in that big bed…all alone…just the two of us…with nobody in sight that could interrupt us,” you teased while giving him a slow once-over. 
“Fuck, why does she have to make this harder than it already is,�� Joe thought to himself, an idea quickly popping up into his head that would solve this problem.
“But that’s just the thing. I won’t be sitting next to you in bed,” he smirked.
“What?” you asked.
“I’m sleeping in the second bedroom,” Joe wiggled his eyebrows and said as he walked around you towards the bedroom. 
Your jaw dropped to the floor, “Joe!” you yelled as you followed him through the large suite. “You wouldn’t dare,”. 
“Ohhh, but I would,” he laughed as he glanced back at you, watching as you quickly matched his pace and walked up next to him. 
“Joe, we haven’t had sex in 2 days,” you complained. “I can’t take it anymore,”.
“And that’s exactly why tomorrow night will be better,” he smirked as he made it to the little hallway where the bedrooms were, opening the door of the second one and flipping around on the doorstep so you couldn’t come in. “Nope. Your room is over there,” he pointed across the little hallway as you bumped into his chest, then backed up because of the stubborn smile on his adorable face.  
“You’re not serious,” you said while placing your hands on your hips.
“I’m very serious,” he slurred and nodded. “We can’t be in the same bed before we get married,”. 
“Fine,” you huffed, seeing that he wasn’t going to budge so you shouldn’t waste your breath trying to get him to cave. Whenever Joe set his mind on doing something, he always did it.
“You’re going to wake up and regret this, Burrow. And stop with the marriage thing. Our wedding is in July, not tomorrow,” you shook your head and turned around to go into the bedroom you’d been sleeping in alone tonight. 
“I loveeee youuuu,” he grinned as you opened the door to the room.
You turned around and couldn’t help but giggle at the scene, “You make me crazy, but I love you too. But also, I’m still mad at you for this,” you said as you turned your smile back into a pout, earning a throaty laugh for him before he closed his door. 
A few minutes later, you were lying on your back and staring up at the ceiling, absolutely bored out of your mind as the ache between your thighs got stronger and stronger and the only person who could fix it refused to come near you. 
“Fuck,” you whispered to yourself as you ran your hands along your neck. You still couldn’t quite understand how Joe could still get you like this years later. Back then, getting turned on by him was a given because you hadn’t gotten a taste of what this was like with him consistently. But now, you had gotten plenty of tastes and he still got you like this. Either you were insatiable as hell or he was just too damn good. Or maybe it was a bit of both. 
Flashback to your 4th date 
“Tonight was really fun,” you smiled over at Joe, who was walking you to the front step of your house. He had taken you out on your 4th date tonight, taking you to glow-in-the-dark Mini Golf and treating you to dinner at a retro diner nearby. Every date with Joe just got better and better; you couldn’t get enough of him. You couldn’t get enough of his contagious laugh, silly stories, and his constant looks of admiration for you. That pull he talked about feeling from you, yeah, you were feeling it for him too. Everything about him made you happy. He was a walking ray of sunshine in your life which was something you desperately needed. 
“I’m glad you had fun,” he smiled as he led you over to your door. “I hope this isn’t getting too boring for you,” he said while scratching his neck. Although everything was going smoothly between the two of you, he couldn’t help the few doubts that crept through. 
“Boring?” you laughed. “Joe, please. Our first date solidified that you are physically incapable of ever boring me. I mean, we were in that restaurant for 4 and a half hours,”. 
“Yeah, you’re right,” he chuckled. “You managed to get my entire life story out of me in those 4 ish hours, even shit I’ve never told anyone,”.
“I peeled your onion pretty quickly, didn’t I?” you smiled as you played with the rings on your fingers. “I didn’t even cry,”.
Joe’s heart skipped a beat and his eyes instantly moved from the ground to your eyes. “Onion? Peeling my onion? She compares people to onions too? Like me?” Joe thought to himself. 
“You- you compare people to onions too?” he swallowed. 
“Yeah,” you giggled. “I know it’s silly, but people are like onions just less smelly–they both have layers. There is more to what is seen on the surface, you know? Like each layer represents different parts of your personality,  experiences, emotions, and thoughts. As you get to know someone better, you peel back these layers, discovering deeper and more complex parts about them,” you smiled. “But doing so can also make you cry, because well, onions can make you cry just like people can,”.
“You’re everything I’ve ever wanted,” Joe whispered out loud, his cheeks turning red once he realized he just said that to you. 
“….I am?” you blushed as you rocked back and forth on your feet.
“I..uh…yeah,” he stuttered, feeling a spark inside of his heart. “I compare people to onions too but I’ve never met anyone who does the same,” he nervously smiled, hoping that he didn’t just weird you out by saying you were everything he’s ever wanted—even though it was 100% truthful. 
“Look at us being on the same wavelength,” you smiled as you grabbed his hand and entwined your fingers. 
“That’s really cool,” he shyly smiled, the blush on his cheeks now matching the blush on yours and his eyes staring deeply into yours as you held onto his hand. You both continued to stare at each other in silence, not exactly sure why but it felt right. You didn’t want to let go of his hand and quite frankly, you didn’t want to let go of him either. Tonight was amazing, and you didn’t want it to end. You didn’t want him to leave. 
“I should get going,” Joe said as he broke eye contact and looked down at his watch, letting go of your hand which startled you. 
“Or you could stay?” You quickly said as you looked back up at him with hopeful eyes. You and Joe hadn’t spent the night together yet so this would be the first time you’d ever stayed over at each other's house. The first time it would be just the two of you, together, in a quiet house, with a bed, for hours. 
Specifically with a bed. 
You’d be lying if you said there wasn’t a single unholy thought in your head about the man standing in front of you. You had managed to keep it PG between you both—except for the occasional wandering hands during a little make-out session—but you wanted nothing more than for him to touch you everywhere, to kiss you everywhere, and to make you feel like the most special girl on the planet. 
You wanted Joe so bad. You tried to fight it when you first met, but you couldn’t stay away and his extraordinary personality made it even harder. He was the epitome of sexiness, the textbook definition of perfection. From his gorgeous dirty blonde curls to his adorable ski slope nose, to his killer jawline, down to his plump pink lips, and then to his crafted-from-gold chest that you wanted to run your fingers along, he was the hottest man you’d ever come across. And he was all yours. 
But were you all his? Did he want you as bad as you wanted him? 
“Are you sure?” Joe said while anxiously playing with his wristbands. 
“Yeah,” you nodded. “I had a lot of fun tonight and I don’t want it to end. We could go inside and watch a movie or something,” you said while turning around to unlock the door. “If you want to, obviously,”.
“I’d love to,” Joe contently sighed, a feeling of excitement sparking inside of him as he followed you inside your house.  
It was just the two of you, in this house, alone, at night. Nothing bad could happen, right? 
But what if you wanted something bad to happen? 
What if you both wanted something bad to happen? 
A half-hour passed by and you and Joe were sitting on your couch, watching “The Proposal”. You would think since you put on a classic & incredibly sweet romantic comedy, you and Joe would be curled up in each other's arms and glued to each other as you laughed your hearts out. 
But you weren’t.
Instead, you two were awkwardly sitting next to each other with none of your body parts touching each other and with both of your hearts beating out of your chests because of how nervous you felt. 
By saying that you both kept your relationship PG so far, you really meant PG. Yeah, you two kissed a lot and even had a few spicy make-outs, but oddly enough—cuddling wasn’t common. Hell, you barely even cuddled with each other. Cuddling was so intimate and special, the feeling of your bodies pressed against each other out of pure love and comfort was unmatchable.
That’s why you both are so nervous right now. This was a prime cuddle moment. You wanted to scooch over and lay your head down on his chest while he wrapped his arm around your waist, but you were too scared he wouldn’t want to. How could you go there if you couldn’t even cuddle him without getting anxious and nervous? The fact that you even wanted to cuddle with him was enough to scare you. Since when did you get so comfy around a guy so quickly? 
“Snap out of it, Y/N. Stop getting in your head over this,” you thought to yourself. 
Joe was nervous because you made him nervous. He’d been pretty vocal about how badly he wanted you—your first meeting clearly giving that away—and those feelings were heightened right now because of the situation you were in. You were coming off of a really good date night and were all alone in your house; the situation couldn’t be more perfect for things to happen. Things Joe literally spent hours thinking about. 
He was so down bad for you and he hadn’t even gotten a full taste of what you had to offer. It was insane. “Come on, Joe. Pull her over. Why are you sitting like you don’t know each other? She’s literally made out with you in your lap so why are you being so awkward?” he thought to himself. “Wake the fuck up, Joe. This is your girl,”. 
“My girl,” he mumbled under his breath, causing you to look over at him.
“Did you say something?” you breathed out, your palms getting sweaty as your brain wouldn’t shut up about how awkward this situation was.
“Hm? Oh…no,” Joe said, his cheeks turning red again once he realized he said that out loud. “I’m gonna go get a glass of water, you want one?” He quickly changed the subject and got up.
“Oh, I’m good,” you swallowed, letting out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in once he walked around the couch and back to the kitchen. 
“A glass of water. That’s what I need,” Joe thought to himself as he grabbed a glass from your cabinet and poured himself some water, looking up a few times and seeing you laughing adorably on the couch in front of him. “When you go back, sit down closer to her. Put your arm around her, girls love that,” Joe’s subconscious said.
Joe took a final sip of the icy cold water—a much needed refresher—before he walked back over to the couch, your eyes following him as he sat down next to you. As he sat down closer to you. 
You froze as you felt his arm touching your arm, and then suddenly felt him move his arm and place it around your shoulder, then felt him pull you into his warm chest. “Oh my god,” you thought to yourself as you heard his heartbeat through his chest. “Wait, is he nervous too?”.
You stayed quiet and frozen for a few seconds before literally melting against him. The feeling of his thumb rubbing your skin and his head leaning against yours was something you craved, and now you finally had it. You felt like a piece of melting chocolate on a warm tongue. 
Joe smiled as he felt you relax against him, planting a sweet kiss on your forehead as you got comfy on him. This calmed all of his doubts and nerves, you felt comfortable with him and that’s all that mattered. 
“This is nice,” you smiled up at him a few moments later, showing your appreciation for his actions. 
“It’s very nice,” Joe chuckled, his laugh vibrating through your body. “I’m glad you feel comfortable around me, I got a bit nervous there,”.
“Feel my palms, Joey. They’re sweaty as hell. I feel nervous around you,” you giggled.
“Nervous? Why are you nervous?” He questioned.
“…Because,” you said while taking a deep breath and turning serious. “I’ve never felt this way about a guy before. Especially this fast,”.
“Really?” He said while looking down at you.
“Yeahhhh,” you sighed. “It takes me a minute to get comfortable around a guy like this. I usually have all my walls up early on because I’m scared that if I don’t, they’ll see the most vulnerable parts of me and then they’ll know exactly what my achilles heel is. I’ve made the stupid mistake of letting my walls down early on a few times, and that’s exactly what happened. They used it against me, and that really fucked me up for a while,”.
Joe's heart broke when he saw your eyes slowly getting glossier as you talked. “I’m- I’m sorry,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. 
“No, don’t be,” you smiled up at him. “You haven’t done anything wrong and that’s why I’m nervous. Usually by now, a guy does something that ticks me off and leaves a sour taste in my mouth. But you? You haven’t done a single thing,” you beamed. 
“So that’s good?” he nervously asked
“It’s great,” you said while leaning up to plant a big kiss on his lips. “I don’t know what it is about you, but I don’t feel the need to put my walls up. I have really, really strong feelings about you. I haven’t even known you for that long, but I know you won’t ever do anything to hurt me,”. 
He wouldn’t. Joe would never do anything to hurt you, never in a million years. He wouldn’t hurt someone that he loved. 
Yeah, he loved you. Was it too early to say it? Absolutely. But he couldn’t help the powerful feelings he felt about you. He’d never fell this fast and hard for a girl, you were clearly unique. “I wouldn’t ever dream of hurting someone so precious and extraordinary,” Joe smiled as he pecked your lips. 
“I knew I liked you for a reason,” you smiled as you buried your face in his chest, his arm tightly wrapping around your waist, his hand slipping a little under your shirt. The feeling of his warm hand against your bare skin sends jolts of electricity throughout your body. 
“Tell me about your exes. I want to know what things they did that ticked you off early on so I know what not to do,” Joe said while he squeezed the soft plush skin of your waist. 
“I don’t think you’ll make the same mistakes they did, trust me. But okay, if you really want to know I won’t stop you,” you laughed. You spent a few minutes ranting to Joe about your exes, his jaw-dropping each time you said something they did—each ex progressively getting worse each time. 
“Where are you finding these guys? Like this is insane,” he said with a wide-eyed stare. 
“Tell me about it,” you rolled your eyes. “And my most recent ex, please,” you scoffed. “You can’t be an incompetent boyfriend and be bad in bed at the same time,”. 
“No way,” Joe gasped.
“Mhmmm. Only cared about getting himself off; never once thought about me and how I felt. I should’ve known, if you can’t take care of a girl in bed then you definitely can’t take care of a girl in a relationship,” you shook your head.
“I’d take care of you,” Joe mumbled under his breath, but just loud enough for you to hear.
“You would?” you smirked as you looked up and said, a gush of wetness instantly pooling at your core. 
“Did I seriously say that out loud AGAIN? Can I not keep anything in my head?” Joe thought to himself. 
He stayed quiet for a few seconds before speaking up, “Yeah, I would,” he boldly said. “Fuck it. This is my girl. She should know how I feel about her straight up, no beating around the bush,”.
You felt a pang of arousal shoot up your body, his alluring words waking up another side of you that you hadn’t seen in a while. “Really?” you asked as you shifted next to him, slowly moving up and placing your legs on each side of him, settling down in his lap. His hands moved down to cup your thighs as you moved his hair out of his eyes, your face just inches from his.
“Yeah,” he nodded as his eyes darkened with lust. “I don’t think I’ll have any issue getting you off before I get off,”.
You felt your breathing stop for a second, “Fuck,” you thought to yourself. “I need him, bad,”. Any and all nervousness and anxiety left your brain at this moment. You couldn’t care less about things that happened in your previous relationships, all you wanted to focus on was Joe. “You sound so sure,” you whispered as you leaned down and peppered kisses along his jaw, his hands moving to your back but slowly inching down to your ass.
“Because I am. I’ll make you scream my name so loudly that you’ll forget about all those other guys. I’ll be the only thing you remember,” he whispered into your ear, his voice thick with lust. 
A switch turned on when he said that and you immediately lifted your head from his jaw and crashed your lips down onto his, your hands cupping his cheeks as you pushed yourself closer to him, his lips fighting for dominance against yours as you ran your hands along his thick chest. 
You wanted him so badly. 
His lips were so addictive, the way they were so soft just felt like you were kissing a cloud. He moved his hands back up to your waist, his fingers tugging on the fabric of your t-shirt, “Bedroom?” he breathlessly asked you as he pulled away.
“Yes,” you panted as he quickly pulled your face back to his and got up from the couch, your legs wrapping tightly around his while he carried you up to your room. 
Once you got inside, he gently threw you down on the bed before ripping his clothes off, both of you moving with a sense of urgency.  When he was completely bare in front of you, that’s when you truly lost it. Your eyes traveled along his body, noticing each and every vein that you would so easily travel along, noticing every muscle and every spot that you deemed kissable. Your eyes then dipped down to the V in his abdomen, your breath stopping again when you saw his prominent erection, the tip of his cock pooling with precum.
“Fuck me. Literally and figuratively,” you thought to yourself. You looked back up at him and ripped your shirt and shorts off, quickly making yourself bare just like he was. Normally, you’d feel insecure and shy with a guy when it got to this point. But with Joe, all you felt was comfort and confidence, it was amazing. 
Joe looked down at you, taking in every part of your body for the first time; your perfect thighs, your soft belly, your perfect & gorgeous breasts. You were all his, and you were so beautiful. You felt a dip in the bed as he moved on top of you, “You’re gorgeous, Y/N,” he whispered as he peppered kisses along your chest. “So insanely gorgeous,”.
“Joe, I need you,” you whispered as you felt your core throb and your body relax underneath him. 
“Before we actually, you know, do it..you’re good, right? I don’t want you to feel any pressure or stress to do anything if you don’t really want to,” Joe said while tucking your hair behind your ear. 
You grabbed his hand and shoved it down to your core, his eyes looking down as you ran his fingers through your wetness. “You feel that? That’s all for you, Joe,” you blubbered, the way his fingers were sliding along your folds was teasing yet so satisfying. “Please, fuck me. Make me forget about them,” you said while intensely staring into his eyes, his eyes turning a shade of blue you’d never seen before. 
You wanted this just as bad as he did and he wanted this just as bad as you did. 
He leaned down and captured your lips in another heated kiss before sliding his hand up your belly to cup your breast, playing with the sensitive bud at the same time as he lined himself up with your dripping core and thrusted all the way into you, wasting no second to get straight to it. The intensity of the first thrust caught you completely off guard, the feeling of fullness and being stretched out by him for the first time making you abruptly pull away and let out a throaty moan. “Oh, fuck,” you moaned as he set a relentless pace. “Fuck, Joe,”.
“Fuck,” he whimpered above you, his hair falling down and acting as a curtain. “Jesus, you feel so good,” he groaned as the warm feeling of your walls felt like a tight hug around his cock. 
You placed your hands on his back, digging your nails into his muscular body as he continued to fuck you in the most delicious way possible; each thrust laced with need and infatuation. He grabbed your leg, cupping the back of your knee and pushing it up which opened you up even more, allowing him to hit new spots as he explored you in the most intimate way imaginable. “Does it feel…good,” Joe wailed as he pounded into your wet heat.
“It feels amazing,” you whimpered while throwing your head to the side, his lips instantly attacking your neck with little nips and sucks. The feeling of him inside you was sending electricity throughout your body, he was so good at this. Each thrust hit the right spot inside your core, each kiss landed on the right spot, and each word that left his mouth made you lose any and all control you had. He definitely was better than your exes, and he was definitely taking care of you. 
“F- fuck, Joe. P- please, fuck me forever,” the filthy words leaving your mouth surprised both you and Joe. 
“You’re so needy, baby,” he smirked as he peppered kisses along your jaw. “Were they that bad?” he asked, referring to your exes.
“Mmph,” you whimpered as you moved your head back to look at him. “S- so bad,” you moaned as his thick cock was grazing your g-spot. “Oh, right there,” you practically screamed. 
“What? Right here?” he smirked as he gave you an extra hard thrust, this one sending you up the bed.
“Joe,” you moaned again as your back arched off the bed, but he pushed you back down with his hand and continued to snap his hips into you. He dropped your leg and moved his hand to your abdomen, rubbing the soft skin of your belly and gently pushing down as he inched towards your breasts. He leaned down and took your nipple in his mouth, his tongue swirling around the sensitive peak as you threaded your hands through his hair. 
You lost track of the amount of times you moaned his name just like how you lost track of how much time had passed. There were no real thoughts in your head, all you could think about was how good this felt and how it was all because of Joe. Your chemistry was insane. It was like pure fire between you both.
You felt your arousal building in your stomach as he continued to send you over the edge, both of you moving with pure lust and desire. “You’re doing so well, Y/N…that’s it,” he whimpered as he dropped his head to the crook of your neck. “Fuck, you’re perfect,” he moaned.
You couldn’t help but smile, he was praising you and making you feel good at the same time. He was truly the perfect guy; he lacked in no area. Each time your name fell from his lips, you found yourself yearning for more and more. You deserved this, you deserved him, his love, his touch, his everything. 
“Joe, I’m so close,” you moaned, your chest heaving as the band in your stomach tightened with each thrust, the room filling with sounds of your pleasure and the wetness below. 
“Mmph, me too,” he whimpered, trying to hold back his release because he wanted to make sure that you felt your high first, just as how it should be. 
You looked down and saw his thick shaft moving in and out of your core, that sight alone made you let go. “Oh- oh,” you croaked as you felt him lift his head and move his hand down to your clit. 
“Come on, baby,” he panted as his fingers toyed with your sensitive clit. “Come for me,” he said as he leaned down to kiss you again. You lifted your legs and wrapped them around his waist, pulling his head closer to you at the same time as you moaned into the kiss. Your hips started jerking and bucking up into him, your body starting to tremble under him as you felt your walls spasm and contract around his cock. 
“Joe!” you screamed against his lips after one well-placed thrust, the tension snapping as you came around his cock. You were seeing stars at this point as your release soaked both your lower halves, Joe feeling his cock twitch inside of you. Your reaction, your rolling eyes, and the sounds leaving your lips were pushing him straight toward the finish line. 
“My girl…that’s my girl…,” he rasped as his hips stuttered and his thrusts became erratic, his high practically knocking at the door. “You’re so fucking hot,” he groaned as he watched you feel your high below him, your breathy moans that were filling the room being one of the greatest and prettiest things he had ever heard.
You let out a few more sounds of pleasure as you felt shockwaves throughout your body from your intense orgasm, your body fully limp as he dropped his head and bit down on your shoulder. “Oh, fuck..Y/N,” he moaned as he felt the band in his stomach tighten. He wanted to let go so bad, but he wasn’t going to make this “just good enough” for you. He was going to make this better than anything you’d ever felt before. 
“F- fuck, Joe,” you whispered, coming down from your high just to feel another one building as you felt your walls tightening around his cock again. Before you knew it, his hands were on your waist and he flipped you over so that you were on top. 
“W- what?” you panted as you placed your hands on his beautifully crafted chest, his cock still seated deeply inside of you. Your brain was so fogged up with arousal that you couldn’t comprehend what was going on. 
“Fuck, keep going,” he whimpered, his hands grabbing your waist again as you continued to stare down at him–a frisky grin appearing on your face as you leaned down to give him a passion-filled kiss. 
“You’re the best,” you whispered as you got back up, your hips starting to rock back and forth against his. He looked so right underneath you with his tousled curls and open mouth that was repeating your name over and over, this was meant to happen. Not only was your sexual chemistry on fire, but your emotional chemistry was too. He knew exactly what you wanted, how you wanted it, and knew how to give it to you without you having to say a single thing to him. 
He reached up to cup your breast with one hand, the pad of his thumb rubbing your nipple as you closed your eyes and quickened your pace against him, his arousal just begging to be released. The restraint he had was insane and quite frankly, it was killing him. But this was about you, not him.
“Just like that,” he whimpered, bucking his hips up into your core slowly, helping you reach your second orgasm faster. 
“Joe, I can’t…it’s too- you’re too…,” you said while letting out a shaky breath, this time your climax feeling stronger than the previous one. 
“Yes, you can,” he said as he slid his hand up your back, pushing you down to him and cupping the nape of your neck. “I’m right here,” he softly said against your lips.
“J- Joe,” you whimpered as you hid your face in his neck, his hips snapping into yours as you felt your thighs starting to burn.
“You make me crazy, Y/N,” he groaned as he moved his hand back down to your clit, his voice laced with pure need. “You make me so fucking crazy,”.
“Oh, Joe,” you moaned into his ear, placing a hand on the side of his neck as you opened your mouth to bite his earlobe. A thin layer of sweat was forming on both of you as your movements became more frantic like you were both chasing something you couldn’t get enough of. It was like an insatiable desire for more.
Joe started rubbing circles around your clit, your body reacting with a slight tremble as jolts of pleasure started vibrating through it. Your breathing was getting deeper and deeper and a few breathless seconds later, you felt him pinch your sensitive bud which ultimately set off your release. 
“Joe!” you screamed again as the strength of your orgasm made you sit back up, your movements stilling as you came around his still-moving cock again. “Oh my fucking god. You are not real,” you whimpered while your high washed over you.
“F- fuck. I’m,” Joe choked out, not being able to hold it in any longer. 
You looked down through your messy hair that was falling in front of your eyes and saw his face—specifically his scrunched up nose—and knew that now it was your turn to make him feel good. 
Although you were about two seconds away from passing out and still dealing with the aftershocks of your second high, you leaned down and smashed your lips against his while cupping his face, allowing him to do whatever he needed to feel as good as you did right now. A few more hip snaps later, he emptied himself inside of you—endless ropes of his warm cum filling your already—soaked core. This was the first time you’d ever felt him like this, and it was everything you’d dreamed of and more. Joe was everything you dreamed of and more.
A few minutes later, your body was lethargic as you lay on top of him, his arms tightly wrapped around your tired frame. You felt his hand rubbing the back of your head and playing with the strands of your hair, words of love and affection filling your ears as he went on and on about how perfect you were. 
Joe was truly the man of your dreams. Not only did he do what your ex couldn’t do, he did it twice, and he did it better than anyone else could. All while making you feel safe, comfortable, and in control. He was truly perfect for you in every way possible, emotionally and physically. 
“So?” Joe spoke up, his hand now rubbing slow circles around your back. “How was it?”.
You shifted your head on his chest to look up at him, “Are you god? I think I’ve been sent to heaven,” you giggled. 
“You liked it?” He softly asked again, a shy smile on his face.
“I loved it,” you grinned as you leaned up to peck his lips. “I loved all of it. You’re amazing,”. 
“No, you’re amazing. Seriously. I was already obsessed with you and your personality, but now I’m also obsessed with your body. You’re insanely beautiful and insanely sexy,” he blushed. 
“Awww, stop,” you blushed while patting his bare chest, pressing a few kisses along his pec. 
“Do you still remember their names?” Joe smirked, referring to how he told you he’d make you scream his name so loudly that you’d forget the others. 
Of course, you didn’t, Joe made sure you didn’t. He worshiped your body tonight and his name left your lips like you were chanting a sacred prayer. He was unlike anyone you’d ever been with before, he was special. 
“Whose names?” you grinned up at him. “I only know one name,” you added as you scooted up so that you were by his ear. 
“What name?” Joe said while biting his swollen bottom lip. 
“Joe,” you whispered into his ear, the sultry tone of your voice making Joe instantly pull you right back underneath the covers.
“Joeeee,” you giggled as he flipped you over and the white covers created a cocoon around you two. 
“What?” he grinned down at you. “You thought I was done?”.
“Maybe,” you teasingly shrugged. 
“Well, I’m not. That was just the beginning,” he winked as he leaned down and peppered wet kisses down your abdomen, his head eventually disappearing in between your thighs. 
You looked back up, not knowing what to expect since seemingly you were doing everything with him in one night—not that you were complaining. You hadn’t even mentally prepared yourself for him to go down on you, this position was so incredibly intimate and raw. 
But he didn’t give you a chance to overthink because suddenly, you felt his warm mouth latch onto your swollen clit and a finger thrust into your core, another shock of pleasure vibrating through your body. “Joe,” you moaned loudly, your brain turning off as he threw your leg over his shoulder. The only coherent thought in your head was that he was the best thing that could’ve ever happened to you. 
End of flashback 
“Holy fuck,” you whispered to yourself as you snapped back to the present. The spicy memory made you feel even more needier than before and you had absolutely no idea what to do. You knew he wasn’t going to budge but you definitely were not going to be able to fall asleep like this. “Of course, the universe gave me the sexiest guy known to mankind,” you grumbled as you stuffed your face in your hands, “I can’t stand being away from him,”. You still couldn’t quite believe that he was all yours and would be forever. He was truly one of the most special people you’d ever met in your life and he changed your world in a way you thought was impossible. You were going to marry him in a few short months (or tomorrow based on Joe’s silly drunken thoughts that he would most likely forget about) and get to spend the rest of your life with him. You couldn’t ask for anything better, your life was perfect. 
You sat on the bed for a few more minutes, thinking of a way to cool yourself down because you could just feel your body getting hotter and hotter as the minutes passed by. All you could think about was Joe.
Your eyes traveled around the room, looking for anything that could calm you down. There was a bottle of wine, but that would just make your hormones skyrocket more than they already were since you were still as drunk as ever from earlier. There was Joe’s stash of edibles, but that would probably make you even more horny. You let out a shaky breath as your eyes moved to the bathroom, an obvious reliever right in front of you the whole time.
“Cold shower, obviously,” you sighed as you quickly got up and walked into the bathroom. 
Meanwhile, Joe was struggling too. Even though it was his idea, it wasn’t being executed successfully. The tent in his pants and the need to feel your lips around him were strong. He refused to get off on his own, so now he was stuck sitting on the bed and staring up at the blank ceiling, wondering if he should cave and go back to your shared room and finish what you started.
“Nope. Not happening,” Joe said as he sat up and shook his head. “I’m marrying her tomorrow, I can wait,” he assured himself.   
Joe was so serious about marrying you tomorrow even if you didn’t believe him, he could wait any longer to fully make you his even though you had only been engaged for a month. He didn’t care that it was going to happen in Vegas or that no family would be here. It would be much more special and intimate if it was just the two of you and truthfully, that was all he wanted. He was down for a big ceremony and party, but as someone who didn’t enjoy big crowds and all eyes being on him (even though he played football in front of 50,000+ fans every week), he would rather do something like this. Plus, something about getting married secretly in Las Vegas at a small chapel was giving him an adrenaline rush; it sounded like much more fun than standing in a big hall in front of hundreds of people who had their eyes glued on him. This way, it was just the two of you.  
You were his dream girl and were finally about to be his forever girl. He couldn’t wait to stand across from his girl at the altar and recite the vows, say the things he needed to say and kiss his wife for the first time. 
He laid back down on the bed, smiling as he imagined what your married life would look like. First, he needed to plan your honeymoon with you. You both had 2 places in mind–Porotifno, Italy, and St. Barths–and since you were having 2 weddings you’d also have 2 honeymoons which meant you could go to both places instead of having to pick one. He couldn’t wait to travel with you more, especially around the world now that he had moved on from his whole ‘I hate traveling’ shtick. There was a whole lot of world out there to see and he couldn’t have asked for a better person to see it with him. Another thing he couldn’t wait to do with you was have kids. Although that was still a few years down the road, he was so excited to watch you grow his child inside your belly. He was so excited to grow his family with you. 
Another thing he was looking forward to was all of your ‘firsts’ as a married couple. The first time you have sex as a married couple, your first vacation, your first big purchase together, your first husband/wife date, your first anniversary, your first Christmas, your first Valentine’s Day, and your first baby together. 
It was all he could think about as he drifted off to sleep with a huge smile plastered on his face. He thought his life up until he met you had been perfect and like a dream–a solid college football career and successful NFL career plus the fame and attention that came with it–but his future with you was even more promising and fulfilling than all of it. 
You were more fulfilling than anything he had in his life. 
The Next Night – STK Steakhouse – Las Vegas, Nevada 
“Ooo, Joe you have to try this Crab Cake,” you chewed as you covered your mouth and handed him a crab cake. “I feel like I’m eating gold right now,”.
“Considering this is one of the most expensive and highly rated restaurants in Vegas, I would expect no less,” he smiled as he took the crab cake and took a big bite, a groan leaving his lips as the bundle of flavors exploded in his mouth. “Holy shit, this is actually amazing,”. 
“I told you,” you giggled while you bumped his leg with yours, then reached for your wine and took a small sip to wash down your food as you were wrapping up dinner. He had brought you out on a date tonight to one of the best restaurants in Vegas, even going so far as renting a private room for you both so you could enjoy the night in private. You weren’t exactly sure why since eating in public was never an issue before, but you decided to let it go. 
The day had passed by pretty quickly up until now as you both kept yourselves busy by relaxing by the pool together and soaking up the sun, Joe didn’t mention his marriage idea at all the entire time which wasn’t surprising for you. You knew that was just one of his drunken words that had no real meaning behind them, so him forgetting about what he said last night wasn’t a big deal. Although it was weird he wasn’t confused when he woke up in a different bedroom in the morning since he seemingly forgot the marriage talk which is how he ended up in that room because of how drunk he was, but you also let that go. 
“You think we’re all done? Or did you want to stay for a little longer,” Joe asked, praying you said that you were good to go so he wouldn’t be late for the time he booked your wedding for. 
Yeah, wedding. 
He didn’t forget. He just decided to keep quiet the whole day so that this moment would be way more memorable. While you were taking a dip in the pool, he found a little classic Vegas chapel down the street from the restaurant he was taking you for dinner and booked a little private ceremony for tonight. All while you were blissfully unaware that this was your last few hours as his fiancee. 
“Uhh, I think so,” you nodded as you looked around. “I’m stuffed and probably would throw up if we ordered dessert,” you laughed. 
“Okay, cool,” he nodded, rubbing his sweaty palms on his thighs as he took a deep breath.
“But don’t you think it’s a little early to head back? Or did you have something else planned for our little date night since you think absolutely everything through ahead of time,” you said while putting your elbows on the table resting your chin on your knuckles, and looking at him with pure love.
“We’re not heading back,” Joe said matter-of-factly.
“Where are we going then?” you said while raising an eyebrow. 
Joe let out a little laugh as a song lyric from The Dixie Cups entered his head, “Because we're, going to the chapel, and we're gonna get married,” he sing-songed while moving his shoulders back and forth as he pretended to dance around. 
You stared at him for a few seconds, your face not changing as you expected him to say he was just kidding since you two were not that drunk like you were last night for him to be talking like this. 
“W- wait, you’re serious?” you said as you sat up after he didn’t say anything else.
“Run away with me, Y/N,” Joe blurted out as he lost the lighthearted tone in his voice and became serious. “Marry me, right here, right now,”.
Your heart was pounding in your chest and a wave of reality hit you like a brick. He wanted to marry you right now. Like right now. 
“I know it’s not what we planned, but I can’t wait anymore. I know you’re the one and I need to make it officially official, the ring is a great reminder but I want to make you the one for real,” he said as he grabbed your hand, his thumb grazing over your engagement ring. “I booked us a time slot at that chapel down the street. We can go right now, just say the word,”.
You felt your eyes well with tears, he was serious about it. You knew that you were getting married to him now that you were engaged, but the fact that it was this close to actually happening was making your heart stop. You didn’t realize you were really crying until you felt his thumb wiping the falling tears. 
“I didn’t mean to make you cry, baby,” he softly said while cupping your cheek. “If this is too much too fast, I can cancel. I can wait,” he lied. He couldn’t wait, who was he kidding? But if this was too much for you, he could make himself wait. He would do anything for you. 
“I- I thought you were drunk last night and that’s why you said that,” you sniffled. 
“Drunken words are sober thoughts,” he smiled. “I was being serious,”. 
“Y- you really want to marry me right now?” you said while meeting his gentle eyes.
“I’ve never wanted to do something so bad in my entire life,” he said.
“But what about our friends and family? Shouldn’t we wait for our parents? Shouldn’t we talk to them?” you said while placing a hand on top of his.
“Actually, I want it to just be you and me as cliche as it sounds. It’s always been you and me and it’s always going to be you and me, Y/N. You are the most important person in the world to me, I just need you there. I want this moment just for us,” he said while picking up your hand and planting a gentle kiss on it. “We can still have our big wedding in July with everyone like we thought about, but I want this to just be for us. But only if you want that too,” he said while looking down at your ring.
You stayed silent while you thought over it, “He’s thought it all through. He’s thought everything through from the first time we met, to our first date, to our first time, to the proposal, and now this. Whenever Joe set his mind on doing something, he always did it. Whether that was convincing me to go out with him or wanting to make me his forever, he did it. He wanted this with me. He’s always wanted this with me,”. 
“Okay,” you breathed out, a thrill shooting up your spine at the thought of marrying Joe in secret.  
“What?” Joe said while he looked back up.
“Okay,” you smiled again. “I don’t care how we get married, Joey. I’ll marry you in secret, I’ll marry you in front of a thousand people, I’ll marry you on top of the Empire State Building, I’ll marry you drunk, high, naked, you name it. I’ll run away with you,”.
“You’re serious?” Joe asked, his body perking up. “Because if this is a joke, it’s not funny…like I will not forgive you if this is a jo-....,”.
“I’m serious, Joe,” you said as you interrupted his nervous rambling. “Let’s go get married,” you said while pulling his head closer to yours by the nape of his neck. 
Joe bit his bottom lip as a blush grew on his face, “I love you, Y/N. You have no idea how happy you make me,” he said while he rested his forehead against yours.
“I love you endlessly, Joe,” you smiled before you tilted your head to press an expressive kiss to his lips. 
“Let’s go get married,” you said against his lips when you pulled away. 
“Let’s go get married,” he softly chuckled, quickly sliding out of the booth and pulling you out with him, his hand holding onto yours tightly. 
He pulled you out of the private room with speed, both of you flying through the crowded dining room while you quickly dodged the waiters and servers. “Joe,” you laughed. “Slow down,”.
“Nope. I have to get us there before you change your mind,” he joked while he glanced back at you.
“Well if that’s the case, then the clock is ticking, Burrow,” you teased as you made it to the front door of the restaurant. 
“Fuck, I didn’t call an Uber,” he realized as he stopped you both before you walked out onto the street. 
“You said it’s down the street right? We can walk,” you suggested. 
“Are you sure? Won’t your feet hurt?” he asked as he inspected your burgundy heel boots. 
“Probably, but it’ll all be worth it in the end,” you said while opening the door and pulling him out onto the street, the fresh breeze taking all of your worries away.
“Okay,” he laughed, the adorable crinkles around his eyes showing up as he tightly held onto your hand again and pulled you down the street. You felt like it was the early days in your relationship again with the way you were sneaking around. In the past, it was sneaking around together to keep your relationship on the low for a little, but now it was sneaking around to get married without anyone knowing. It’s funny how everything had changed in the blink of a crinkling eye.
You were only a few more blocks away from the little chapel before you stopped in your tracks, Joe feeling a tug on his hand and looking back at you. “What’s wrong?”.
“I don’t have a white dress on,” you said while looking down at your black mini-dress. “I can’t get married without a white dress,”.
“Well, I don’t think we’re going to have time to go dress shopping,” Joe laughed. 
“Mmm,” you hummed while looking around the street. “Oh, look,” you said while pointing over at the boutique across the street. “I could find a basic white mini dress in there,” you looked over at him and said. 
Joe looked down at his watch, seeing that you had a few minutes to spare. “I think we have time,”. 
“Okay, good,” you breathed out. “I’ll go, you stay here,”.
“Okay,” he eagerly nodded, feeling you let go of his hand before quickly walking across the street, your sense of urgency making him feel like he was on top of the world. You really wanted this just as bad as he did. 
When you walked into the store, you quickly glanced around to spot a white dress, the store owner noticed your frantic state and spoke up. “Can I help you, young lady?” she asked. 
“Yes, actually,” you said while walking over to the front desk. “I need a white dress,”. 
Her eyes landed on the massive rock on your ringer finger, then broke out into a huge fit of laughter after you said that. “Ohhhh, Stacy owes me $20,” she laughed.
“Excuse me?” you questioned her strange behavior.
“Oh, sorry sweetie. It’s just comical,” she said while getting up and motioning for you to follow her.
“What’s funny?” you asked as you followed her to the back of the store, your eyes widening once you got closer to the wall of white mini-dresses, white heels, and veils. “Holy shit,” you mumbled. 
“You’re surprised? You can’t expect a boutique to be this close to the little chapel and not be stocked up with wedding wear,” she laughed. “You aren’t the first girl to run in here in search of a white dress,”. 
“Clearly,” you said as you walked closer to the display, your eyes looking over the variety of dresses and heels. 
“Stacy, my employee, owes me $20 because she said we weren’t going to get a bride-to-be in the store today,” she said.
“And then I walked in,” you blushed as your eyes instantly landed on the perfect, simple yet glamorous, white mini dress. 
“You sure did,” she smiled as she walked over next to you. “You like this one?” she asked after she saw the spark in your eyes.
“I love it,” you whispered. 
“Oh, here honey,” she said as she spotted a pair of heels that went with the dress. “These go great together,”. 
You looked over at the beautiful pair of white jeweled heels which had flimsy soft white bows tied to the clasps. “This is perfect,” you smiled over at her. 
“Oh my goodness, it has a matching veil too!” she clapped her hands together and grinned before she brought over a delicate shoulder-length veil. 
“Thank you, so so so much,” you smiled as you grabbed the simple yet flawless veil. 
“My pleasure,” she nodded. “Now hurry, let’s get you checked out so that the groom isn’t kept waiting too long,” she laughed as you scurried back over to the front desk. 
“Good idea,” you giggled. “I think if I made him wait any longer, he’d drag me out of the store himself,”.
“Tell me about him,” she said while she quickly started scanning everything. 
“Where do I even start,” you grinned as you looked out the store window and saw Joe rocking back and forth on his feet, the biggest smile you had ever seen on his face.
“He’s my everything. My whole world in the form of a person. He’s the biggest sweetheart I’ve ever met and has shown me a kind of love I never thought I’d ever have. I don’t think I really knew what love felt like until I met Joe. I honestly don’t think I even knew what truly living life felt like before I met him. He keeps me on my toes, acts like my safety net when things get too chaotic, and is the one thing I physically can’t live without,” you blushed as you looked back over at the lady, who was holding a bag with all your things in it. “Oh, you’re fast with it,” you giggled while handing her your card. 
“Well, as I said, you’re not the first bride to run into the store for wedding wear,” she winked, noticing the spark behind your eyes after you finished talking about Joe.
“Yeah,” you laughed as you took the bag. 
“But he sounds like a wonderful man, sweetie. A word of advice, hold onto that love for as long as you can and never let it fade no matter what happens. That spark behind your eyes only comes around so often, it’s rare,” she told you. 
“Thank you, I will,” you nodded. “I appreciate your help tonight,”.
“It’s my pleasure, dear. Enjoy your married life, I wish you the best,” she waved over at Joe through the window before looking back at you. “He looks and sounds like a keeper, hold onto him forever,”. 
“Oh trust me, I will,” you said before thanking her again, then swiftly exiting the boutique and joining Joe back across the street. 
“We good now?” he asked as he grabbed your hand and entwined your fingers again. 
“Yes, Mr. Burrow,” you giggled while leaning up to kiss his cheek.
“Okay, Ms. Y/LN, I think we have a wedding to get to,” he grinned before pulling you down the street again, another soft laugh falling from your lips as another wave of reality came over you. Your whole future was in front of you, right at your fingertips. 
About an hour later
You both were inside the chapel and had finished filling out the paperwork that they needed to approve the marriage license–which apparently needed 90 days to be approved but one mention of Joe’s status changed that pretty quickly. 
Joe was already wearing a black dress shirt and formal-ish pants, so they just gave him a bowtie to finish it off. You two had also decided to keep the custom, special vows for your big wedding so you’d be sticking to the classic ones for tonight. 
After slipping on your dress, heels, and veil, you were standing in front of the mirror and holding your bouquet of white roses. You were thinking about how your life was about to change in a matter of minutes and you still couldn’t quite believe it, you were about to become his wife. 
Joe was about to become your husband. 
You felt your nerves settling in when you looked down at the ring on your finger, inhaling a few deep breaths to compose yourself. “It’s okay, I’m okay,” you told yourself out loud. “This is my wedding. That’s my husband. This is it,” you continued. 
“Y/N, we’re ready,” Vanessa, one of the chapel’s bridal assistants smiled as she entered the room which snapped you out of your daze. 
You took a few more seconds to collect yourself, “Okay,” you breathed out. “Here we go, Y/N. This is what you’ve been waiting for since the day you met Joe,” you thought to yourself before turning around, hearing the soft tune of the music fill the air as you walked through the curtain and made it to the aisle. 
Your breath hitched in your throat as you saw Joe standing at the altar with the officiant, his eyes widening once he saw you in your white dress–you looked like an angel. “Oh shit,” he whispered to himself. 
“Fuck,” you mumbled under your breath as you started to walk down the aisle, all your nerves disappearing once you see Joe mouth ‘I love you’ to you. 
You finished walking down the aisle and placed the bouquet down on one of the benches in front of you before you took your place across from Joe. 
“You look beautiful, Y/N,” Joe mouthed to you, his heart soaring at the sight of you in a veil and a white dress, only imagining how he’d feel when you’re in your real wedding dress in a few months.
“Not too bad yourself, Burrow,” you mouthed back before you heard the officiant clear his throat. 
“Welcome, everyone. We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the union of Y/N and Joe, two hearts and souls in marriage. This is a day of great joy, for we have come together to recognize the tremendous love and commitment these two share,” he said. 
“Today, we stand together to witness a love story that has been written in the stars, a story that has brought us all here to celebrate the union of two souls who have found their forever in each other. As we gather in this moment, we are reminded that love is not just a feeling but a journey—one filled with laughter, challenges, and countless memories that shape who we are. Today is the beginning of a new chapter, one where two hearts, once separate, now beat as one. It’s a day when promises are made, not just with words but with the deepest parts of our hearts. May this day be a reflection of the love and commitment you share, and may it be the foundation of a marriage filled with joy, compassion, and endless adventures. So, let us celebrate this momentous occasion, as you embark on this incredible journey of life together. Here's to love, laughter, and a lifetime of happiness," he added, the sweet opening remarks making you and Joe both get a little misty-eyed.
“Joe, Y/N, do you stand here today with the intention to be each other’s partner, rock, and best friend for all the days of your lives?” he asked.
You and Joe both looked back at each other, joining your hands together and saying, “We Do,” in unison. 
“Will you love and honor each other as husband and wife for the rest of your lives?” he asked.
“We will,” you both smiled in unison again, Joe giving you a gentle squeeze in return. 
“Joe, do you take Y/N to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold from this day forward, For better, for worse, For richer, for poorer, In sickness and in health, To love and to cherish, Till death do you part?” he asked, both your hearts about to beat out of your chest. 
“I, do,” Joe nods as he tries to hold back his tears, giving you another squeeze as you feel your heart explode.
“Y/N, do you take Joe to be your lawfully wedded husband? To have and to hold from this day forward, For better, for worse, For richer, for poorer, In sickness and in health, To love and to cherish, Till death do you part?”.
“I, do,” you answer, goosebumps rising on your skin as you feel the room get 10 times brighter. 
“It is my great pleasure to now pronounce you both husband and wife. Joe, you may kiss the bride,” he said. 
Joe quickly pulled you into him and captured your lips in a passion-filled, needy kiss; one that said everything without saying anything. 
You were finally his. You were finally the one. 
His hands settled on your waist before one slowly slid up your back while you looped your arms around his neck and pulled his face closer to deepen the kiss, your lips moving against each other in a familiar dance. After a few heated seconds, you felt him bite down on your bottom lip when you threaded your fingers through his curls, a sound leaving your lips that immediately made you pull away out of sheer embarrassment. 
“Oh my god,” you giggled as he rested his forehead against yours. 
“Damn, wait till we’re back at the hotel, Mrs. Burrow,” he grinned, watching a blush rise on your face after referring to you as his wife.
“Sorry, I can’t help myself, Mr. Burrow,” you teased while nuzzling your nose against his. 
“I can’t believe we did that,” Joe laughed. “We’re crazy,”.
“The craziest,” you agreed. “But I’m glad we did. It was just you and me like it was supposed to be,”.
It was just the two of you, and that made Joe the happiest man on the planet. Nobody could ruin this moment. 
“I love you, Y/N,” he choked out—high on emotions—before pulling you in for a hug. “I love you so much and I can’t wait to show you how much I do for the rest of our lives,”.
You felt the tears coming back when he squeezed you, the tone of his voice enough to make you want to break down into tears. “I love you, Joe. Thank you for being the one,”. 
“No, thank you,” he corrected before pulling away. “Your name was unwillingly carved into my heart since the moment I saw you. Thank you for letting me carve mine into yours,”.
“I didn’t need to let you, Joe. You won my heart over the moment you asked me out on a date” you grinned. 
“I didn’t, but we could go back and forth on this for hours,” he laughed as he grabbed your hand. 
“That’s debatable, babe, but I’ll let it go for tonight,” you chuckled while dropping your head on your shoulder.
God, Joe could never get tired of hearing that adorable laughter. And now he’d get to hear it for the rest of his life. “You ready to be a Wife?” he asked as you felt him press a kiss to your hair.
“Mhmmmm,” you grinned while turning your head to look up at him.
“You ready to be a Husband?” you asked while kissing his neck.
“Mhmmmm,” he hummed while dropping his hands to your ass, giving it a gentle squeeze that made a twinge of arousal shoot up your spine. “You wanna get out of here?” he whispered in your ears. “I think it’s time for us to consummate the marriage, my lovely and sexy Wife”.
“You’ve been watching way too much Bridgerton with me,” you shook your head as you pulled away and looked up at him, his heated gaze making you feel naked even though you were fully clothed. 
“But yeah, let’s go, my handsome and precious Husband,”.
–To Be Continued–
496 notes · View notes
coquitokisses · 5 months ago
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Back Together | Bucky Barnes
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female reader, (husband!Bucky Barnes x wife!reader, dad!Bucky Barnes x mom!reader)
Word count: 2.4k
Warnings/Tags: Bucky being dad and hubby material, fluff, angst maybe?
Summary: Bucky and reader are married and have two girls, but because of Bucky’s work, reader decides to “break up” and have been separated for a few months. (Let’s say that this “job” was when the whole thing with John Walker happened in TFATWS, idfk lol)
A/N: so I’m currently writing a fanfic (on wattpad) and I had this idea, but I’m not there on the fanfic just yet lol so I decided to just post it here (also, my first language isn’t english so if there are any errors or mistakes, I’m sorry lmao)
The girls are like 4 and 5 years old and those aren’t the names I have planned on using for the fanfic, but it’ll do for now.. and Steve is alive and well lol (he doesn’t make an appearance, but I do mention him, like I said, this idea came as I was writing a fanfic so what I did was try and edit it a little bit so yall don’t need context and shit lol just enjoy okay?)
A/N #2: this is my first time doing this so just bare with me please lmao
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It’s almost 10 pm which means Bucky must be on his way to bring the girls back after having them for the weekend. You were away in Seattle the whole weekend for work, but anyways it was Bucky’s turn to stay with the kids. They were supposed to stay with Wanda tonight, but since you arrived earlier than anticipated, you told her that Bucky was gonna bring them over.
You’re not on the best terms. Actually, you’re broken up at the moment and have been like that for like three months now. It all started because of Bucky’s “job”. You always said that he wasn’t being careful with the things he did and you didn’t like the constant worrying about him every time he went out to do his things. He didn’t really see it that way which made you get into a really bad fight and you decided to break up because he wasn’t putting his safety, or his family, as a priority and you didn’t like that.
Which was kinda true. So you’re currently not living together. Bucky has been staying with Steve, or with Sam whenever he comes to New York. The girls usually stay with you and then Bucky takes them on the weekends, but whenever you can’t take them to school (or get them on time) or something on week days, then Bucky takes them without a problem.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to pick them up for you?” Wanda asked while on FaceTime with you
“It’s alright, red, don’t worry.” You replied “Besides, Bucky’s probably on his way anyway.”
“Still haven’t talked?”
“Well we talk, just not about us.” You said walking out of the kitchen
“And are you guys still, like, mad or..?”
“I don’t know.” You let out a sigh
“Steve told you he got out.”
“I know.”
“So?”
“I just.. I don’t know, I haven’t talked to him about it.”
“Well I think you need to.” She said “Just have a little chat and see where things are at.. you guys still love each other.”
And you did. Of course you did. And the girls want you to get back together too. But you just haven’t talked about it again.
“I don’t know, I’ll think about it.” You replied and just as you said that, you saw the car lights through the window “He’s here, I gotta go.”
“Call me if you need anything.”
“I will, love you.”
“Love you more.”
You hung up the call and left the phone on the couch before heading to the door. You opened it and saw Bucky walking over to the house holding Olivia, your youngest, in his arms and Eloise was walking right next to him. And the three of them just looked tired as hell.
“Hi mommy.” Eloise ran over to you
“Hi, pretty girl.” You immediately hugged her
“Say hi to mama, Liv.” Bucky said as he got closer
“Hi mama.” Olivia opened her arms wanting you to pick her up so you did
“Hi, my angel.” You kissed her cheek
“Sorry to bring them so late, we just got out of the cinema.” Bucky said
“Buck, it’s fine, they don’t even go to school yet.” You told him “Did you guys have fun?” You asked the girls
“So much fun!” Eloise replied excitedly “We also went to the trampoline park earlier.”
“Oh well that explains why someone’s a little more tired than others.” You looked at Olivia and she rested her head on your shoulder
“Mommy, can daddy tuck us in tonight, please?” Eloise asked
“Baby, I’m sure mommy had a really long and tired flight and she just wants to sleep.” Bucky told her
“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.” You said “Daddy will tuck you in, sweetheart.” You tucked a few strands of Eloise’s hair behind her ear
“Daddy, come on.” She grabbed Bucky’s hand
You all went inside and you gave the girls a quick shower before Bucky helped them get in their pjs.
“Mommy, are we staying with auntie Wanda tomorrow?�� Eloise asked as she got on her bed
“Yes, baby, I need to go to work.” You replied
“Can’t we stay with daddy?”
“Daddy works too, honey.” You moved her hair out of her face “I thought you liked staying with auntie Wanda.”
“We do, but we wanted to stay with daddy again.” Olivia spoke
“Well I can pick you up at auntie Wanda’s house when I get out of work, how does that sound?” Bucky told them
“And we can get dippin dots too?” Olivia looked at him with puppy eyes
“We can get whatever you girls want.” He said squishing her cheeks making her giggle
You couldn’t help but smile a little. You loved watching Bucky with the girls, he really is an amazing father and they love him like crazy.
“Alright it’s getting super late, time to sleep.” You said to them
“But mom!” Eloise pouted
“No buts, listen to your mom.” Bucky said “Come on, get in bed both of you.”
Each of the girls got in their beds and Bucky went and tucked them both. They have their own separate rooms, but they’re pretty close and they’ve always wanted to sleep in the same room so when the time came and you bought Olivia her big girl bed, Bucky just placed it in Eloise’s room. Anyways, when the time comes when they get to the point where they don’t even want to look at each other, you’ll probably make Bucky move Olivia’s bed back to her room and problem solved. But for now, they absolutely love being in the same room.
“I love you.” Bucky kissed Olivia’s forehead “And I love you.” He then kissed Eloise’s “So so much.”
“We love you too, daddy.” They said
“Now get some sleep because auntie Wanda is coming early tomorrow to pick you up before I leave.” You leaned down to kiss each of them on their heads “I love you both so insanely much.”
“Love you too, mommy.”
“Now go to sleep or I’ll call the slender man.” Bucky said as he turned off the light
He quickly closed the door once you got out of the room and the girls let out a scream that made you both laugh.
“You’re evil.” You chuckled “Creating them traumas so young.”
“It gives them strength.”
You rolled your eyes laughing. “Of course.”
You both went downstairs and then Bucky went back to the car to bring back Olivia’s shoes and a few toys that the girls left in the car. While you put them on the dining table, Bucky was just telling you what they did and how the girls were on the weekend.
“Liv didn’t even asked for my help to wipe her after using the bathroom.”
“No?!” You looked at him kinda shocked
Potty training Eloise was way easier than training Olivia. First she was afraid of the toilet being flushed, then she was afraid that something would come out and bite her, then she didn’t want to stay alone while using the toilet. It’s been a rollercoaster for all of you.
“No, she did it all by herself.”
“Oh my god, really? I’m gonna cry.” You said with a hand on your chest
“She said she’s a big girl and big girls don’t need any help to go potty.”
“She is a big girl.” You said “Fuck, they’re both getting so big.”
“They are.” He nodded “How was Seattle?”
“Fucking amazing.” You said excited “It’s so pretty.”
“And how did it went? Are they planning on transferring you?”
“Hell no, I told Nick I’m not leaving New York.” You replied “If we were still living in the compound, then this would’ve been a whole different conversation, but we’re not and we have kids now so no, I’m not leaving even if they pay me more.”
“Well if they are paying you more then..” he raised his eyebrows
You laughed. “You know what I mean, idiot.” You rolled your eyes “But no, I’m not being transferred.”
“Then why did you go?”
“Nick said that they needed someone like me for some training.” You answered “It was great, I got to teach a few people about self defense, how exciting.”
“I’m glad.” He said with a small smile
He was genuinely happy for you. He knew how much you’ve missed working like that. Being an agent, a spy, you missed it. But at the same time, it wasn’t really in your plans anymore ever since you got pregnant with Eloise. It happened during the blip as well so you weren’t exactly working as an agent or spy anymore so you just decided to leave it behind for good. Until recently.
“You know, if it’s really what you want, then go for it.” He told you “The girls aren’t stopping you and neither am I.”
“I know, but it’s just that I feel like I’m on a different stage in life now.” You said “It felt fucking amazing, don’t get me wrong.”
“Then do it, talk with Nick and tell him to put you out there, that’s what you want.”
“I don’t know.” You let out a sigh
“We’re not going anywhere, you know that, right?” He said and you looked at him “And how cool would it be for the girls to say that their mommy is a spy?”
You laughed. “They will brag about it for sure.”
“And the best part is that you’re great at it and always have been.”
“I don’t know, I’ll think about it.” You shrugged looking at the time on the stove “It’s getting very late.” You looked at him
“Ouch okay, I’m leaving.”
“Oh my god.” You rolled your eyes
“Are we gonna keep this up?” He looked at you
“What?”
“This nonsense.” He motioned his hand between the two of you
“This nonsense?” You arched an eyebrow “Do I need to remind you whose fault is it that we’re on this position right now?”
“It could’ve gone so much better, but little miss I’m extremely petty over here, doesn’t like to listen to people and doesn’t care about anything other than her opinion.” He said
“Oh don’t make me mad, James.” You crossed your arms
“It’s the truth and you know it.”
“I think you can go now.” You said turning around and starting to walk away
“See what I mean?” You heard him say from behind “Can’t we just talk about it like normal people?” He asked following you
“I don’t think there’s anything to talk about.” You said turning around to look at him
“Well I think it is.”
“Bucky..”
“Y/N, come on.” He sighed “It’s been three months, are you gonna keep pushing me away?”
And he’s right, you’ve been kinda pushing him away. To be honest, the whole thing could’ve been avoided if Bucky and you came to an agreement, but you never did. You were upset that he was going away with Sam to do all these things that you weren’t okay with and you were thinking about the kids, which, at the moment, he wasn’t doing and that pissed you off. That was the whole thing. He didn’t want to empathize with the way you were viewing the whole situation and he was kinda making you look crazy. Saying things like “it’s not a big deal” or “everything will be alright, you don’t need to freak out”.
How does he expect you to not freak out when he doesn’t care about doing all this dangerous things? Was he insane?
In other circumstances, if you didn’t have kids for example, maybe you would’ve been a little bit more okay with it, maybe. But it’s a whole different scenario now.
And you were kinda pushing him away, sort of. But it wasn’t intentional, it’s just that you were kinda petty and there were times where he wanted to kinda fix things, but you wouldn’t let him because you would find a way to push him away unconsciously.
“You made me feel like I was exaggerating when I clearly wasn’t.” You said
“Because at the moment I did feel that way and I didn’t want to view the situation the way you were.” He explained “And I know I was wrong for that and I’m sorry.”
You let out a sigh. “You still went.”
“I know, I’m sorry, I should’ve stayed here with you, I regretted it the moment I left with Sam.” He said “And I came back as soon as I could.”
“And you stayed with Steve.” You rolled your eyes
“Baby, you wanted to kill me, do you really think I was just gonna come and ask you to take me back after that shit? Like you were just gonna accept me.”
“… Well, you’re kinda right.”
“I know, Steve told me you were pissed and that you wanted to punch me.”
“I did tell him that.” You nodded
“I’m sorry, I really am.”
“It’s fine, just forget it, I’m sick of the topic anyway.” You replied leaning on the back of the couch
“But are we fine?” He asked
“I don’t know, are we?”
“Well I’d say we are, kinda.” He got closer to you “You want me to do anything?”
“You could start by fixing the damn back door.”
“Again? But I just fixed it a few months ago.”
“Well I think you did it wrong because the doorknob is broken again.”
“I need to change that fucking door already.” He rolled his eyes “Anything else? Are you still mad at me?”
“A little.” You replied
“Just a little?” He moved his hands to your hips “I can help you change your mind.”
“Easy there, soldier.”
“Easy my ass, come here.”
Before you could even protest, his real hand grabbed your neck and he pulled you in for a kiss that screamed need. You really missed his kisses and just the way he would always give you a peck, whenever and wherever, whatever you were doing, he didn’t give a single care in the world. This man could see you sitting on the toilet and he still would go and give you a quick kiss.
“God, I’ve missed you.” He whispered on your lips “I’ve missed you so fucking much.”
“I did too.”
“Can we please never fight again?” He gently put his forehead against yours
“As long as you don’t piss me the fuck off doing some stupid shit like that again, we’re good.”
“Good.” He nodded before kissing you again
“And I swear to god..” you started saying between kisses “If I see you again that close to John Walker, I’m gonna kill you.”
“I know.” He said lowering his hands to the back of your thighs and picking you up
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masterlist
a/n: should I post the fanfic here? What do we think? Lol (I’ve been thinking about it A LOT lately)
**UPDATE! I ended up uploading the fanfic and here is the masterlist for it lol
Anywaysss, hope you liked this! <3
(Likes and reblogs will be appreciated)
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missqhughes · 4 months ago
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MORE THAN FRIENDS | L. HUGHES43
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-> luke hughes x fem! reader
-> contains: angst (resolved), kissing, mentions of underage drinking, mentions of sex and sexual acts, fluff, use of y/n, lowercase intended
-> IN WHICH: all the alcohol has wore off, and y/n finds herself naked in her best friends bed. things take a turn for the worst when luke starts to hint regret towards what they did the night before; but what does that mean for their friendship?
-> part 2 to get comfortable! i’m sorry i can’t just write pure angst i’ll make myself too sad. but dw it’s gonna be so juicy. also if ur missing someone goooooood fucking luck reading this w dry eyes 🫥alsoloveitasmuchasidothankyouhappyreadingggg!
*fic is not proofread
18+ CONTENT BELOW THE CUT
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the all too well known pounding headache was the first thing y/n woke up to; oh, and also being completely naked in luke’s bed.
her eyes made their best attempt to adjust to the sunlight that poured into his bedroom. she turned over to her side, and there was luke sleeping peacefully, the blanket dangerously low on his waist, revealing hickies littered all over his v-line and stomach.
with a heavy breath, she checks down her own body; chest abused with hickies, trailing all the way down to her inner thighs. a quick look over to her backside reveals a red, unmistakable hand mark on her ass.
there was no denying that she had sex with luke last night.
y/n feels the bed shifting, a groan coming from the boy next to her.
“oh, you’re already up,”
his voice is horse, a combination of his drowsy state and losing it the night before. y/n turns around to face him, lifting up the comforter to cover her chest, any attempt to conceal her bare body to his now sober eyes.
“yeah, i just woke up literally a minute ago,” she says, a small smile to accompany. his eyes scan over her body, taking in all of it, eyes fluttering in an almost of a surprise of what he had done with it.
“do you… do you remember anything of what we did last night?”
y/n started to recount everything of the night before, how she felt with he was thrusting deep into her, his teeth sinking into her skin. how he looked with his head thrown back when she was on her knees in front of him. how he kissed up and down her back, not daring to let go.
“yeah… yeah i do.” she said, mouth twitching into a smile, anything to cure the tension. luke said nothing.
and there it was.
silence.
silence.
silen-
“i think you should go.” his words were a lot colder and harsher than he intended, but he sat up, refusing eye contact with her.
“you know to like… shower and eat and whatnot.”
nice save, she thought.
“no yeah, you’re right, i’m gonna change then be out of here,” she said, collecting her scattered clothing all over the floor. y/n changed into her short pink dress from the night before, ready for the walk-to-the-uber of shame that was ready to greet her.
while she changed, luke also got himself into a pair of boxers. y/n glanced over to him for a second, the image of him in his boxers, tired eyes and his body left with evidence of sex on it being burned into her brain.
“i’ll see you later yeah?” y/n said, opening the door and expecting luke’s usual response of “always,”
he purse his lips before responding, “bye.”
his words weren’t cold, or harsh, but disconnected.
disconnected from her.
y/n looked back at him, and he was already facing away. she wanted to say something, but didn’t let herself. instead she turned around and left.
——————————————————————————
it had been days since luke had spoken to y/n.
a million and one thoughts were racing in her head, each causing more anxiety than the last. they would come up at random times, like a jumpscare any time she let her thoughts travel to luke.
cooking dinner,
did he think it was bad?
studying,
did he regret what they did?
laying in bed, at approximately 3:46am,
did she ruin their friendship?
enough was enough. she needed answers, and she needed them now.
she knew he had practice this day, so in about 20 minutes, y/n found herself stomping into the yost ice arena, on the prowl to find luke. practice had just ended, and she shoved past the other guys and ignored the looks of confusion they gave her each other.
she ripped open the locker room door to a surpised luke, jersey off, but still in gear. his mouth opened, but y/n wasn’t going to let him get the opportunity to speak before her.
“where the hell do you get off on not speaking to me? huh? is it because we fucked? is that it?”
y/n pointed her finger at him accusingly, her face contorted into a look of disgust, but also sadness, and confusion. she was on the guard, but deep down scared shitless of what he was going to say.
luke sighed heavily, facing away from her and shuffling with the things in his section, “i have no idea what you’re talking about.”
y/n scoffed, “bullshit and you know it. what is it? tell me the truth luke warren. so what, we fucked okay? is that really the only reason you don’t speak to me of all people for days?”
he still had his back away from her, but his with his head dipped down, arms on his side. “it was a mistake. we shouldn’t have done it.”
she felt tears welling up in her eyes, cheeks flushed hot with anger and embarrassment.
“i’m so glad you think that luke,” she paused, making the best effort she could to control the shakyness in her voice, or how her throat burned in an attempt to get the words out. “if this is how you’re going to act after what happened, don’t speak to me now, or ever.”
it stung like hell to say, but she meant it. having enough with the situation, not being able to bear how much it hurt for him to be in her presence, she turned around and walked to the exit.
she didn’t look back. not like last time. but luke did. his body faced her as she slammed the door shut, only catching the last bit of her clothing and hair, her scent lingering where she was standing. his eyes were tinted red from tears, breath caught in his throat from regret with what he said, and even worse, what he didn’t say.
——————————————————————————
weeks had passed since they last spoke.
y/n was a mess. she refused to go out, turning her nose up at even the thought of drinking. her body ached when her mind wandered to luke; what he was doing, how he was doing, if he was thinking of her.
it hurt like hell.
and there she sat, curled up in the shower, recounting the memories her and luke shared. how they were always the first to wish happy birthday to each other. sharing their first middle school class together. sitting by the firepit, talking for hours at the lake house. crying in each others arms when they both got accepted to their shared dream school. graduation. a picture her parents took of them hugging outside their freshman year dorm building. how they held each other when no one else would understand, how they would still laugh their asses off even when no one would understand the joke but them.
oh, how he understood her. how fiercely they cared for one another, how he was always there, how she loved him, how it was always him. if it was one person she could choose, over and over again, it was luke.
but he was gone. just like that.
y/n had been in there for so long her fingers were wrinkled, and the water had turned a numbing coolness. she forced herself to get out, thanking to god that none of her roommates were home, knowing how pissed they’d be about her water usage.
she changed into sweatpants first, then begrudgingly putting on one of luke’s sweatshirts, a dark blue crewneck that read “michigan hockey” across it. y/n knew it would hurt to wear it, but she wanted any bit of luke left she could have.
about 10 minutes had passed, y/n was combing through her slightly damp hair, when she heard a knock at the door.
she went up to answer it, thinking one of her roommates was back and had just forgotten their key.
instead, y/n was met with a clearly unwell luke. his eyes were dark from lack of sleep, lips resting in a frown, all resting on a somber face to top it all off.
she felt like she was hallucinating. that she was in a dream, that her body was going to twitch and bring her back down to earth, back to reality. back to sitting down combing her hair, luke nowhere in sight.
they said nothing but everything at the same time. their expressions exactly matched, but still not quite knowing what the other was thinking.
“luke,” she breathed out, his name in the air barely above a whisper. y/n’s eyes fluttered, the emotions coming in like they never did before.
“can i come in, please?” his voice cracked, his expression pleading her to come in more than his words did.
she nodded, moving out of the way so he could step in. she sat over to walk on the couch, adding a pillow to her lap, hoping luke wasn’t able to see her body shaking and riddled with anxiety at his presence. but also comfort, and hope.
“why are you here luke?” y/n asked, demanding to know why he randomly showed up, after weeks of silence between them.
he ran his hands through his curls, biting his lip harshly before delivering his answer, “i need to be honest, i needed to tell the truth to you.”
“i thought you did that when we talked in the locker room,” she hissed, “all of that sounded pretty truthful to me.”
she didn’t want to rude, but how could he say that after practically punching her in the gut that day?
“no, you don’t understand,” he kneeled down to her level, unable to control the shaky hands that he brought up to hold his head in.
“then help me understand luke,” y/n voice was much softer this time, chest throbbing with pain seeing luke in more distress than she has ever seen him in.
“i was scared,” he said in a short breath, teardrops painting his cheeks, “i was scared after what we did because i thought it meant nothing to you, that we were just drunk. that you would tell me that you regret what we did, but i didn’t. not once.”
her gaze bounced between his hazel eyes, shocked at the news he was telling her. his face didn’t relax once, as he continued his truth, “i’m so in love with you y/n. i’m so scared you don’t feel the same way. i care about you, i need you, i feel so fucking…so fucking lost when you’re not there. nothing has felt the same.”
“i should’ve told you the truth, and i’m sorry.” his voice cracked again, and now luke was in full on sobs.
y/n could say nothing yet, still in shock, now again feeling like she was hallucinating. she opened her arms, and luke sat down on the couch with her and came crashing in.
he buried his face in the crook of her neck, arms tightly wrapped around her, terrified that if he let go she would be gone again. he cried into her, taking in her scent, her warm skin, her gentle touch, all of which he missed dearly.
“i love you, luke. i love you, i should’ve said it sooner,” y/n felt the pain that had accumulated for weeks begin to disappear in minutes with luke, the only ailment to her sickness. he sighed, pressing his forehead to hers with closed eyes.
“we both should’ve said it sooner, i’m so sorry y/n. i cant let you go. not now, not ever,” he held her tighter than ever, shifting his head to plant a soft kiss on her forhead.
she cupped his face in her hands, seeing him look at her with so much love made her stomach flutter.
“you have me luke, always.”
that’s when he kissed her. it was night and day between the first time their lips met. the first was new, lustful, wavering in its stability. this time, it was familiar, warm and feeling like they both could go on like this forever. their lips moved in perfect harmony, y/n crawling atop luke’s lap to bring herself as close to him as she possibly could.
they just barely pulled away, desperately needing to catch their breaths.
“now you’re never getting rid of me lu,” she giggled,
“wouldn’t even dream of it,” luke said, laying her down on the couch in her fit of giggles, peppering sweet kisses all over her face.
——————————————————————————
© missqhughes
xoxo, kaia
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lefteagleblizzard · 5 months ago
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ℭ𝔯𝔲𝔰𝔥 𝔞𝔠𝔯𝔬𝔰𝔰 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔰𝔱𝔯𝔢𝔢𝔱
Mike Schmidt x male reader
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Summary: Life as a college student was hectic. You had always noticed Mike Schmidt, the quiet, brooding neighbor who lived just a few houses down. Though he was about five years older than you, that gap only fueled the intrigue and admiration you felt toward him. You admired the way he balanced his responsibilities, especially his care for his younger sister, Abby. Over the years, this admiration blossomed into a deep-seated crush that you couldn't quite shake off. Today, you finally got the chance to talk to him again after so much time due to you going to college.
Warnings: Age-gap (5 years) between you and Mike. Male reader. He/him pronouns used towards the reader. Fluff. Strangers/Friends to lovers. Smut at the end. Top Mike. Bottom reader. Reader being called “good boy”. Handjob (M receiving). Anal sex.
Words count: 5000
Part 2-Part 3-Part 4-Part 5-Part 6-Part 7-Part 8-Part 9-Part 10-Part 11
Can also be found on wattpad and ao3
This is different from the usual gender-neutral stuff I write, and I’m sorry to those who are used to them. I’m just so sad about never being able to find a male reader story, something that I can relate to. Your support and understanding mean a lot to me!
You had always noticed Mike Schmidt, the quiet, brooding neighbor who lived just a few houses down. Though he was about five years older than you, that gap only fueled the intrigue and admiration you felt toward him.
Over the years, you often saw him in the mornings when he returned from work, his expression weary but softened when he exchanged a word or two with your father.
Those fleeting moments were enough to plant a growing crush in your heart, a mix of admiration and something deeper you couldn't quite name.
One crisp morning, as you grabbed your backpack, ready to head out to college, you ran into him.
Literally.
You were in such a rush that you barely noticed him until you bumped into his solid frame on the sidewalk.
"Whoa, sorry about that," he chuckled, a warm sound that made your heart race. His hazel eyes, always a bit shadowed with fatigue, brightening just a little at the sight of you.
His hair was slightly tousled, and there was a shadow of stubble on his chin, which somehow made him even more attractive.
The sight of him made your heart skip a beat, a reaction you were becoming increasingly familiar with but were still not quite used to.
You felt your cheeks heat up, embarrassed by your clumsiness but secretly thrilled to be talking to him. "You're in a hurry, aren't you?"
His voice was deep and warm, like a comforting blanket after a long day.
You laughed nervously, trying to play it cool. "Yeah, running late as usual. What about you? Just getting back from work?"
"Yeah," he replied, scratching the back of his neck in a way you found endearing. His movements were tired yet graceful, revealing the strain of long nights but also a quiet resilience you admired. "Long night, But hey, it's good to finally bump into you —literally."
"You're looking... good." You regretted your choice of words almost immediately, feeling your face flush with embarrassment.
Mike chuckled softly, the sound warm and comforting, as if he was genuinely pleased by your compliment. "Thanks. You look great too. College must be treating you well."
"Thanks," you murmured, trying to hide your blush and not wanting to make a fool of yourself in front of him.
"The usual chaos. It's busy, but I'm hanging in there. I guess I'm learning a lot, though some days it feels more like I'm just trying to survive."
He chuckled, nodding knowingly. "Sounds about right. I remember those days, even if they were a bit short-lived for me. Dropping out to take care of Abby was the right choice, but sometimes I wonder what it would've been like to finish."
The way he spoke, his voice tinged with a mix of nostalgia and acceptance, made your heart ache. You admired him for the sacrifices he made. "You did what you had to do. Abby's lucky to have you looking out for her."
You stood there, both hesitant yet unwilling to end the conversation. It had been a while since you'd last talked. Life, college, and his busy schedule made these interactions rare. But when they happened, they were the highlight of your week. There was a warmth to his presence, a comforting steadiness that contrasted with the chaos of your daily life.
"So, how's Abby doing?" you asked, shifting the weight of your backpack on your shoulder. You knew how much she meant to him and how hard he fought to keep her happy and safe.
"She's great," Mike said, a genuine smile breaking through his usual guarded demeanor. His eyes softened, a hint of pride and affection in them. "Growing up way too fast, though. She actually asked about you the other day.
The idea that Abby remembered you, even though you'd only met a few times, warmed your heart. You tried to picture her as you remembered-a bright, inquisitive little girl who could light up a room with her laughter. "That's sweet. I should stop by more often."
"Yeah, you should," he replied, a glint in his beautiful hazel eyes that made your heart skip a beat. There was something earnest in his tone, something that suggested he wouldn't mind having you around more often. "She misses having someone around who doesn't mind her endless questions."
"I don't mind at all," you said quickly, realizing how eager you sounded. "In fact, I like talking to her. She's a really smart kid."
"She is," Mike agreed, his expression softening further.
"And you?" The question slipped out before you could stop it. "How are things going with... you know, the custody stuff?"
A shadow crossed his face, and you regretted bringing it up. You watched as his shoulders tensed slightly, and the easy smile slipped a notch.
"It's... it's been tough. My aunt's not making it any easier," he admitted, his voice tinged with frustration. There was a pause, a moment of shared understanding of the challenges he faced. You admired his strength, how he continued to push forward despite everything.
Your temper flared at the thought of the obstacles thrown his way. "That woman is just-" You caught yourself, but not before an unsavory word slipped out.
You covered your mouth, horrified, but Mike just laughed, a sound that was more soothing than you'd anticipated.
"You're not wrong," he said, his laughter fading into a soft smile. "But it's nice to know someone's on my side. You're cute when you're mad, you know that?"
The compliment caught you off guard, heat rushing to your cheeks. You tried to brush it off with a smile, but inside, you were glowing. He noticed, of course, but chose to let it slide.
"Well, I just... I hope things work out for you, Mike. You deserve that."
His gaze lingered on you, something unreadable in his eyes. You wondered what he saw when he looked at you and if he could sense the emotions you tried so hard to keep under wraps.
"Thanks. It means a lot coming from you" Then, as if suddenly remembering something, he added, "I need to find a new babysitter for Abby. The last one quit because, well, I can't really afford much right now."
Without thinking, you blurted out, "I could do it!" you offered eagerly, almost too quickly, the words spilling out before you had a chance to reconsider.
The offer hung in the air between you, and for a moment, you worried you'd overstepped.
But you couldn't help it. The thought of spending more time with him, getting to know him and Abby better, was too enticing to pass up.
Mike studied you, his expression softening. His eyes held a mix of surprise and gratitude, and you noticed how his lips curved up slightly at the edges, almost as if he was trying not to show too much emotion. "You'd really do that?"
"Of course," you replied, trying to sound casual despite the hammering of your heart. "I mean, I have some free time, and honestly, my college roommate is loud and annoying. Plus, I'd love to help."
He smiled, and it reached his eyes this time. There was a warmth there that seemed to envelop you, drawing you in. "That'd be great. I can't promise much in terms of payment, though."
"Don't worry about it," you said, waving a hand dismissively. "I'd be happy to help. It's not about the money. I'd love to help out, really. I've missed seeing you guys around."
Your heart pounded in your chest, both from the rush of making the offer and from the hope that he would accept.
The way he looked at you then, with a mixture of gratitude and something else— something hopeful—made you believe this was the start of something more.
You felt your heart flutter, a thrilling sensation that made you wonder if maybe he felt something too. "You're really something," he said softly, almost to himself.
You shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant even as your heart soared. "Just trying to do what I can."
"Well, thanks. Really," he said, his voice earnest. "It's nice to see you again after so long.
You nodded, feeling warmth spread through you at his words. "Yeah, it's good to see you to, Mike."
As you both parted ways, you couldn't help but glance back over your shoulder Mike was doing the same, and when your eyes met, he waved. You waved back, feeling a flutter of excitement.
This new arrangement was more than just a job; it was a chance to see him, to learn more about the man who had quietly captured your heart. And maybe, just maybe, it was the beginning of something that could change both your lives for the better.
As you walked away, your mind replayed the conversation. You noticed how Mike seemed to pay close attention to your words, how he listened intently as if every word mattered. It was a rare quality, one that made you feel truly seen and heard. You couldn't help but wonder if there was more beneath the surface of his smiles and laughter, if perhaps he harbored feelings that mirrored your own
Mike's presence lingered with you throughout the day, the memory of his rare smile and warm gaze etched into your thoughts. You found yourself imagining the moments you would share while babysitting Abby, the possibility of spending more time with Mike, getting to know him on a deeper level.
As you reached campus with a heart full of excitement and a mind brimming with thoughts of Mike, you headed into the day, eager for what the future might hold.
The first day of babysitting Abby was a mix of nerves and excitement. As you approached Mike's modest home, a cozy littie house with a well-kept garden, you couldn't help but feel a rush of anticipation and a bit of anxiety. You wanted to make a good impression and hoped that Abby would like you as much as you liked her brother.
Abby greeted you at the door, her eyes wide with curiosity and a hint of shyness. She was a bright, energetic girl with dark hair and a mischievous grin that reminded you so much of Mike. Her presence was immediately infectious, and you felt any lingering anxiety melt away.
"Hi, Abby! I'm here to hang out with you while your brother's at work. How does that sound?" you asked, bending down to her level, hoping to convey friendliness and approachability.
She nodded, her eyes lighting up with enthusiasm as if she had been eagerly anticipating your arrival. "Okay! Can we play with my toys?" Her excitement was palpable, and it was impossible not to be drawn into her world.
"Of course," you replied, smiling as she grabbed your hand and pulled you inside with a surprising amount of strength for such a small person. You were grateful for her enthusiasm, feeling your own spirits lift at the prospect of spending the day with her.
The hours flew by as you played games, read stories, and even painted together. Abby had a vivid imagination, and you found it easy to connect with her. She was talkative, often sharing stories about her day and asking about yours.
Her innocence and curiosity were refreshing, a welcome escape from the complexities of adult life.
"Do you like my brother?" Abby asked innocently, her eyes wide with curiosity as you helped her with her coloring book. Her question caught you off guard, and you felt a blush creeping up your neck.
"I think your brother is a really great person," you said carefully, hoping to dodge the deeper implications of her question. You didn't want to make things awkward or too serious.
She giggled, a knowing look in her eyes that made you wonder just how much she picked up on. "He likes you too. He talks about you sometimes" Her words sent a jolt through you, a mix of excitement and hope that you struggled to keep under control.
Your heart skipped a beat at her words.
Unbeknownst to you, Mike had returned home earlier than expected. He needed to grab some pills he'd forgotten and thought he'd quickly check in on how things were going. As he stepped inside, he heard the sound of Abby's laughter echoing through the house, drawing him toward the living room.
Peeking inside, Mike found you and Abby sprawled on the floor, surrounded by crayons and papers.
Abby was in the middle of telling a story, using her drawings as illustrations, her eyes alight with creativity. You listened intently, encouraging her with nods and comments, clearly engrossed in her imaginative tale.
For a moment, Mike simply stood there, watching the scene unfold before him. His heart swelled with warmth and admiration as he saw the joy on Abby's face, the ease with which you interacted with her. It was a sight he hadn't realized he longed to see, and it stirred something deep within him.
Seeing you there, so effortlessly connecting with Abby, made him fall even more in love with you. It wasn't just your kindness or the way you made Abby laugh, it was the way you seemed to understand her, to know exactly how to make her feel valued and cherished.
Mike cleared his throat, stepping into the room. "Looks like you two are having fun."
You looked up, surprised but pleased to see him. "Hey, Mike. We're just finishing up Abby's latest masterpiece."
Abby beamed at her brother, waving her drawing triumphantly. "Look what we made!”
He approached, crouching beside you to examine the masterpiece. "I love it.”
Abby beamed, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of pride at her joy. "We make a good duo," you agreed, catching Mike's eye. There was something in his gaze, a warmth and appreciation that made your heart flutter.
"Thanks for today," Mike said, his voice low enough for only you to hear. "It means a lot to see her so happy"
"It was my pleasure," you replied, feeling your cheeks heat up under his scrutiny. "She's a wonderful kid."
As the days turned into weeks, your bond with both Abby and Mike deepened. You found yourself looking forward to each visit, eager to spend time with Abby and, more secretly, to see Mike. He was kind, patient, and had a dry sense of humor that often caught you off guard and made you laugh until your sides hurt.
Abby quickly became a friend, often sharing her thoughts and ideas with you. "Do you want to see my drawing?" she'd ask, holding up a colorful sketch that she'd made with all the innocence and creativity of a child.
"Wow, Abby, that's amazing!" you'd respond, genuinely impressed by her creativity. "You've got a real talent." Her pride in her work was infectious, and you felt a deep sense of fulfillment knowing you were making a positive impact in her life, fostering her confidence and creativity.
Meanwhile, your interactions with Mike grew more frequent and meaningful. Sometimes, after Abby had gone to bed, you and Mike would sit in the living room, sharing a beer or a cup of tea, discussing everything from music to movies to life's challenges. These moments became the highlight of your day, a chance to unwind and connect on a deeper level.
One evening, as you settled onto the couch after a long day, Mike handed you a steaming mug of tea, his fingers brushing yours briefly. The contact sent a jolt of electricity through you, and you wondered if he felt it too. Your heart skipped a beat at the possibility, and you felt a warmth spreading through your chest.
"You're really easy to talk to," Mike said, his voice sincere, cutting through the quiet hum of the room. "I don't get that a lot." His admission made your heart swell, knowing that you were someone he felt comfortable with, someone he valued.
"I feel the same way, Mike," you admitted, feeling a warmth in your chest that was becoming all too familiar. "It's nice having someone who gets me and doesn't think I'm weird for my horror movie obsession."
You wanted him to know that you felt a connection, a shared understanding that was rare and precious.
He chuckled, shaking his head, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "I think it's cool. Most people just give me funny looks when I tell them I enjoy those films." His smile was infectious, and you couldn't help but smile back, feeling a sense of camaraderie and mutual understanding.
"Then they're missing out," you said, a smile playing on your lips, enjoying the banter and the ease with which you could share these moments with him.
You found yourself opening up to Mike in ways you hadn't with anyone else, revealing dreams and fears that you usually kept hidden.
There was a trust between you, a sense of safety that encouraged honesty and vulnerability.
"I always wanted to be a writer," you confessed one night, surprised by your own admission. The words felt heavy and significant, a part of yourself that you hadn't shared with many people. "But I don't know if I'm good enough."
Mike looked at you thoughtfully, his gaze steady and encouraging, as if he could see the potential within you. "I think you'd be great. You have a way with words, and you see things differently. That's a gift." His words filled you with a warmth that lingered long after the evening had ended, a validation that resonated deeply with you.
You often caught yourself daydreaming about him, replaying conversations and imagining what it might be like to tell him how you really felt.
The movie you've found online and that you were currently watching, an old, obscure horror film, played on his TV. The film was terrible, with laughable special effects and wooden acting, but it provided ample opportunity for humor.
You tried to focus on the movie, but you found yourself constantly distracted by Mike. The way his eyes crinkled when he laughed, the sound of his chuckle, and the way he seemed genuinely relaxed in your presence made you feel special and welcomed.
"There's something about these films that just never gets old," Mike said, his eyes still glued to the screen as a particularly ridiculous scene unfolded. "I mean, look at that monster. It looks like it was made from papier-mâché. Did they really think that scene would be scary?" Mike chuckled, shaking his head. His laughter was contagious, a sound that filled the room with warmth and lightened the weight of the day.
"Right?" you replied, though your focus was more on him than the film. You watched the way his smile lingered, the subtle way his body leaned toward you as if drawn by an invisible force.
You were lost in thought, contemplating the words that had been on the tip of your tongue for weeks. Watching him enjoy himself, knowing that you were part of the reason he could unwind, filled you with a sense of pride and affection that was hard to ignore.
"There's something I need to tell you," you began, your voice steady but your heart racing. The words were heavy on your tongue, but you knew it was time to speak your truth.
His expression shifted slightly, a flicker of surprise crossing his features. He sensed the seriousness of your tone and straightened, giving you his full attention.
"What's on your mind?" His voice was calm and steady, a reassurance that made the confession feel a little less daunting.
You took a deep breath, gathering your courage and pushing past the fear of rejection. "I really like spending time with you, Mike. And not just as a friend. I've felt this way for a while now." The admission hung in the air between you, a truth that couldn't be taken back.
For a moment, Mike looked at you with wide eyes, clearly caught off guard by your confession, His initial surprise was evident, and you could see the conflict playing out in his mind. He opened his mouth to speak but seemed to struggle to find the right words.
His thoughts were a jumble of emotions and concerns. The age difference between you, Abby, and his financial struggles weighed heavily on him. He didn't want you to feel tied to him, not because he didn't feel anything for you, but because he knew he couldn't give you everything you deserved.
"... I didn't expect this," he finally said, his voice laced with uncertainty. "I care about you a lot, but... it's complicated. You're younger than me. I have a lot of responsibilities with Abby and work. There's a lot I can't give you, and I don't want you to feel stuck because of me. You deserve better" His words were hesitant, filled with an internal struggle that made your heart ache for him.
You understood his hesitation, could see the conflict in his eyes, but you also saw the way he looked at you, the warmth and affection that couldn't be hidden. It was enough to give you hope, to make you want to show him that you didn't care about the obstacles, only about him.
Gently, you moved closer to him, closing the space between you. His eyes widened slightly, but he didn't pull away. Instead, he seemed frozen, waiting to see what you would do next.
Reaching up, you cupped his cheek with your hand, feeling the roughness of his stubble against your palm. "I just want to be here with you." Your voice was soft but firm, a quiet promise of your intentions.
Then, slowly, you leaned in and pressed your lips to his. It was a gentle, tentative kiss, one that held all the feelings you hadn't been able to put into words. For a moment, Mike seemed surprised, his body tensing at the unexpectedness of it all. But then, he melted into the kiss, his hesitation giving way to something deeper.
His hand found your waist, his fingers tightening slightly as he pulled you closer, closing any remaining distance between you.
The kiss was slow and tender, a shared moment that spoke volumes about what words couldn't convey.
You felt him relax against you, his internal conflicts momentarily forgotten as you both gave in to the feelings you had been harboring for so long.
His other hand reached up to gently cradle your head, deepening the kiss as he finally allowed himself to accept what was between you.
When you finally pulled away, breathless and heart racing, you looked into his eyes and saw the worry and doubt had been replaced by something softer and more hopeful.
"Well, that was unexpected," Mike said softly, breaking the silence. His voice was a gentle rumble, carrying a hint of wonder and disbelief.
"In a good way, I hope?" you replied, your own voice barely above a whisper.
"In a very good way," he assured you, his lips curving into a smile that sent a flutter of joy through you.
"I've wanted to do that for a long time," you admitted, a small smile playing on your lips as you stayed close, unwilling to let the moment end.
"Me too," he confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. "l'm still scared about what this means, but I know I don't want to lose what we have."
You leaned in closer, feeling his breath mingle with yours, and captured his lips in another kiss. This one was softer, more lingering, a gentle exploration of the connection between you. It was a silent affirmation of the feelings you both shared, a testament to the bond that had grown between you over time.
You felt his hands slide up your back, pulling you even closer, while you wrapped your arms around his neck, reveling in the warmth and security of his embrace. The kiss deepened, and you lost yourself in the sensation of being so close to him, of sharing in this moment of intimacy and understanding.
A soft sound escaped your lips, a quiet sigh of contentment, and you felt him smile against your mouth. There was a playfulness to his touch now, a sense of joy that mirrored your own.
"Shh," he whispered teasingly, pulling back slightly, his eyes sparkling with amusement.
Mike's lips moved against yours with a growing urgency, his own quiet moans mingling with yours. He tried to keep quiet, pressing soft kisses against your lips to muffle your own sounds, though the effort only served to heighten the sensation, a delicious tension that wound tighter with each passing moment.
His efforts to remain quiet were punctuated by low, throaty grunts, each one a reminder of the passion that simmered between you.
The quiet of the room was punctuated by soft gasps and whispered names, a symphony of affection that crescendoed in perfect harmony.
With a gentle tug, he guided you onto his lap, his touch firm yet careful, as if handling something both precious and fragile. The movement was fluid, instinctive, a seamless continuation of the magnetic pull that had drawn you together on the porch. Your knees settled on either side of him, bringing you chest to chest, your faces inches apart. The heat of his body seeped through your clothes, a tangible reminder of the passion simmering just beneath the surface.
His hands found their place on your legs, fingers splayed to support and explore, tracing slow, deliberate paths along the fabric that covered your skin. It was as though he sought to memorize every contour, every curve, feeding the curiosity that had lingered in the recesses of his mind for years wondering how it would feel to finally hold you close.
You leaned in, capturing his lips with yours in a kiss that was both tender and insistent, a mingling of breath and heartbeat that spoke of shared longing and mutual surrender. The world outside faded further into oblivion, leaving only the two of you entwined in a dance of exploration and affection.
His tongue slipped into your mouth, exploring with a curiosity that had been held in check for too long. The sensation was intoxicating, a dance of intimacy that spoke of all the moments he had wondered, all the times he had imagined what it would be like to taste you.
Mike's quiet grunts of pleasure were a symphony to your ears. You could sense the tension in him, the effort it took to maintain control even as his own desires threatened to overwhelm him.
His fingers brushed over your back, tracing the line of your spine, before moving to explore the curve of your waist and the strength of your thighs.
You mirrored his exploration, your hands finding purchase on his shoulders, feeling the tension and release of muscle beneath your touch. Your fingers traveled to his neck, threading through his hair, drawing him even closer as the kiss became more fervent. It was a symphony of sensation-a blending of warmth, breath, and the gentle hum of shared affection that enveloped you both.
It was as if time itself had slowed, allowing you to savor each second, each heartbeat, as you became one in a language unspoken yet deeply understood.
His hands were slowly gliding all over your hips and lower back now, and they eventually made their way down to rest on your ass.
He squeezed, causing you to grind down against him and you moaned. You started prepping with kisses on his face, his stumble scratching your lips occasionally. Mike groaned in response, his eyes fluttering shut for a minute. You began a slow rhythm of rocking your hips against him, his head falling back to rest on the back of the couch.
"Good boy," Mike murmured against your lips, his voice a low, soothing rumble that vibrated through you. It sent a shiver down your spine, your heart swelling in response to the intimacy of the moment.
Mike's hands, confident yet gentle, found their way beneath the hem of your shirt, a silent question hanging in the air as his fingers brushed against bare skin. You nodded, granting permission. The fabric lifted, sliding over your skin with a whisper, leaving you vulnerable and exposed, yet utterly safe in his embrace.
His touch was electrifying, a gentle exploration of the expanse of your chest, the warmth of his hands grounding and exhilarating all at once.
You leaned up and captured Mike’s lips again in a bruising kiss, moaning into his mouth. His hips bucking up into yours as you quickened the movement of your hips against his.
He was trying to pull you even closer against his body to increase the friction between the two of you as much as possible.
He began peppering open-mouthed kisses all over your chest and collarbones. You sighed, and laced your fingers in his hair, relishing in the feeling of his lips all over you.
He began sucking on one of your nipples, moving one of his hands to play with your other, which earned him a suppressed moan from you and caused you to throw your head back. You tugged on his hair, and it only seemed to make him even more enthusiastic with his movements.
He suddenly stood up, moving his arms to hold onto you tightly as you gasped, but landed back onto the couch almost instantly. You were now laying on your back and still looking up at him as Mike reached to pull his gray shirt off.
He was so handsome.
He began undoing his belt and the button to his jeans, pushing them down his legs. He kicked the jeans off and kneeled down, placing a hand on your thigh and looking at you.
“Can I?” he asked. You didn’t waste a second nodding your head, and you watched as he took his time to pull off your jeans and underwear, throwing them onto the floor beside his own discarded clothes.
Mike didn’t take his eyes off of you for a single second, wanting to admire the sight of you and he moved so that he was now on top of you. He now had you pinned down against the couch cushion, and you felt your own heartbeat inside your eardrums.
He leaned down to kiss you again, his enthusiasm from earlier returning as he deepened the kiss instantly.
He shifted slightly, reaching over to a small drawer built into the side table next to the couch. You watched curiously as he pulled out a small bottle of lube. The position was a bit awkward, and you couldn't help but give him a puzzled look, wondering why it was there instead of in his room.
Mike caught your expression and stuttered slightly, a hint of a blush coloring his cheeks. "Uh, well, I keep it here because of Abby. She tends to rummage around my room looking for toys or paper to draw on."
You giggled at the thought, imagining Abby innocently sifting through Mike's things, completely unaware of what she might find. "That makes sense," you said with a smile, amused by his predicament.
He chuckled along with you, the tension in the air dissolving into something more playful and intimate. With a deft motion, he flicked open the cap of the bottle and poured a small amount onto his fingers, his movements careful and deliberate.
You watched, fascinated, as he spread the substance between his fingers, his focus returning to you with a renewed intensity. There was something thrilling about the trust and care in his actions, a silent promise that you were in good hands.
"Are you sure about this?" he asked softly, his gaze steady and reassuring.
You nodded, feeling your heart race with anticipation and excitement. "Absolutely" you replied, meeting his eyes with unwavering confidence.
His hand slowly trailed from its place at your side, down your hip before moving it to the space between your thighs. You gasped slightly when you felt his touch on your dick, causing fireworks to set off all throughout your body.
You moaned into his mouth now that Mike was touching you exactly where you needed him and he picked up the pace, pumping you as you began to let out soft moans at his touch. He flicks his finger over your tip, which was now leaking profusely.
Your hand returned itself to tangle in his hair while your other made its way to his shoulder to steady yourself.
“Does that feel good, baby?” He questioned, and you could’ve swore he was smirking against your lips.
You whined and nodded slightly. You had very little control over your reactions at this point, and Mike was well aware of this. He quickened his pace once again, and you were beginning to squirm underneath him.
It seemed like he was having a lot of fun at this point, amused by all of the reactions he was dragging out of you. You weren’t sure how this could get any better when he had maneuvered his hand lower, beginning to thrust his middle finger deep into your hole.
Another loud moan, muffled by your own hand, escaped your lips and you squeezed your eyes shut at the sensation, clenching your thighs together around his hand.
He pulled his head away and began biting your jaw, sucking hard enough that it will definitely leave a mark tomorrow, but you were too focused on his finger moving inside of you to care.
Mike then added his ring finger and you whined loudly, tugging on his hair. He let out a groan, and began fucking you faster, causing you to come into his hand, and onto your stomach.
Your back arching off of the couch and your fingers digging into his shoulder, but he didn’t seem to mind one bit.
He was only focused on you, and he would do anything to indulge you at the moment. He pulled his fingers out of you after riding out your climax and shifted above you a bit. Your entire body flooded with warmth and you were panting.
Your recovery was cut short by Mike grinding into you, the length of his cock rubbing against you.
A soft, involuntary groan escaped his lips, signaling his turn.
He pulled back to look at you and his expression was questioning, waiting for an answer before going further with anything.
You whimpered out a small please and that was all it took before he was slowly sinking his cock inside of you.
He threw his head back and groaned, his cock twitching inside of you. You whined at the feeling and bit your lip, squeezing your eyes shut. He slowly bottomed out inside of you and kept still, Pausing to admire you, lost in your serene, blissed-out state, like a masterpiece in a moment of pure tranquility before he began thrusting into you.
“You gonna be a good boy for me?” He groaned out, leaning his head down to speak directly into your ear.
Your eyes shot open when you heard him, whimpering and quickly nodding your head, you were unable to speak, all you that was coming out of your mouth were the most pathetic whines, whimpers, and pants. Hearing him talk like this made you clench around him, which in turn caused him to slam into you faster.
“All mine, every bit of you,” he declared, his words sending shivers down your spine. You bit down hard on your bottom lip, trying to stifle any more sounds that might escape
You wrapped your legs around his hips, your body bouncing each time he thrusted into you, each time even harder than the last.
You and Mike were drenched in sweat, looking like you just conquered an epic adventure.
Your back was continuously arched off of the couch as he kept railing into you.
Your entire body was tingling with pleasure, and you knew you could get addicted to this feeling.
Mike slamming into you at just the right angle, the feeling of his body moving against yours, and before you knew it, Mike had reached his hand down between your bodies to begin stroking faster and faster, and each time a new sound came from your mouth, devoured from his own mouth.
You were officially done for after that. It was all too much, but it was so, so good.
“Please cum for me, my sweet boy. C’mon.” Mike gritted out, and that was all you had needed to hear.
You clenched around Mike’s cock and you came, your eyes rolling on the back of your head. All you could do while riding out your orgasam was squirm from the overstimulation, Mike still pounding into you as he was chasing his own orgasm.
Feeling the tightness of your body, he couldn't hold back any longer, his own release spurting deep within you.
Mike, who had been resting on top of you, shifted to lie beside you, the couch barely wide enough to accommodate both of you. His chest rose and fell rhythmically, a mirror to your own breaths as you both began to calm in the quiet aftermath
Your mind was a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions, the reality of what had just transpired between you and Mike barely beginning to settle in. It felt surreal, like a dream spun from the depths of your imagination, and yet the solid warmth of Mike beside you was a comforting reminder that it had indeed happened.
As you lay there, lost in your thoughts, you felt a gentle nudge against your cheek. Mike was nuzzling you, his stubble a rough but comforting texture against your skin. The affectionate gesture pulled you back to the present, grounding you in the moment and dispelling any lingering disbelief.
He turned his head slightly, capturing your lips in a quick, tender kiss that spoke of both contentment and lingering desire. When he pulled back, a hint of shyness flickered in his eyes, an endearing contrast to the confidence he had shown just moments before.
"Hey," he murmured softly, his voice barely above a whisper in the quiet room. "Do you want to sleep in the bed with me? The couch isn't exactly comfortable for the night."
His invitation caught you off guard, a warmth spreading through you that had nothing to do with the lingering heat from earlier. A smile broke across your face, broad and genuine, as you nodded, the simple gesture carrying a weight of unspoken emotion.
"I'd like that," you replied, your voice infused with a joy that you couldn't hide even if you wanted to.
Note: If you liked this story please leave a comment, I love reading them <3. Next on the list is a Josh Futturman fic from a request on wattpad.
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