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lillforpolin · 24 hours ago

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It's ddg anon, I'll leave it up to you to decide whether to post this, it's your blog after all. I'm seeing a lot of excuses being made for L's behavior, from women no less, and I want to paint a picture for them. I want the women making excuses for him to tell me whether this is respect.

Say you've started casually dating a celebrity. You're young and brand new to a ruthless industry. You spend a lot of time with him and his friends, doing stuff mostly funded by him, but he doesn't post you on his social media, so the public only finds out about your existence circumstantially. And when they do, he only does the bare minimum to acknowledge you by following you from his public Insta and liking a few of your photos. But it's okay, because it's still "early days". By 21st century, Gen Z standards, this more or less constitutes a launch. You can't believe it - you've found your launching pad! You're buzzing.

Meanwhile, this guy knows that he has a romance show to promote soon so he keeps you on the DL. However, at the same time, he has shippers on his tail who he's resentful towards that he likes to bait. So he pulls you into an elaborate game of cat and mouse with them wherein conveniently, he gets to keep his hands clean while you draw their ire. You're desperate to brag to the world that you've bagged him, but you understand. You're the dutiful girlfriend and his career is your joint endeavor because you sure as hell don't have much of one. You see, you're The Cool Girl. And it's okay, because he's taking you to all these places to do all these fun things and he gives you access to all these people you normally wouldn't get, so it's worth it to you, you tell yourself. You celebrate a coup after his team gives a non-committal statement to a tabloid that you exist. You're high on life! You're winning.

The promo tour for the show starts and he and his costar are acting unhinged, domestic and overly comfortable. The public is entranced and has questions. The more adulation from the crowd he gets, the more hidden you become. He takes you to a few events alongside his family so you'll feel important but he confines you to corners while he works the room. But you're elated because there are cameras there and important people. You're in the room. You've gained 10k followers. You're winning. But are you, really?

The tour draws to a close and he decides he wants to make a clean break from the lovable goof persona he feels others have put on him. You see, he wants to be A Cool Guy too. He wants the world to know that he dates models, okay? He wants to signal to the fandom girlies that they don't stand a chance with him, so stop hounding him, okay? He tells the delulu fuck-u-u, and you're the one he does it through. What an honor, right?

Except, the stunt backfires. All those fans he'd gained during the promo tour? Oh, they turn on him. They turn on him hard. And they don't like you. He thought he had them locked in? Well, guess again. He's in hot water, but the person they're really tearing up on social media is you. Now he's in a pickle, you see, because he's scheduled a string of fashion-related appearances with you in tow to cement his new image, except the online vitriol will. not. subside. All those diehard fans he thought he had? Now they're his haters. And there's an army of them. An angry mob. And he uses you as a shield. He cowers. He doesn't step up to defend you like a man should. But you take the L because you got to be in Milan for Fashion Week, after all. You're a nobody but the paps are after you. It'll be worth it, you tell yourself. It is worth it. You matter to him, right? He takes you on free trips, after all. You strike a pose.

He still tries to play the same games over the summer with you, painting a picture of a jet-setting lifestyle via his friends' socials because that's what he's dreamed of since he was a kid - the footballer's life. And you've been cast as his useful little WAG. How lucky are you? Thousands, if not millions of people's eyes are on you now. You couldn't buy this type of exposure, and you certainly couldn't earn it through your own talent. So even if he does treat you like a servant, you gain something in return, right? There are women who would kill to be in your position. So you grin and bear it.

Meanwhile, the public stays mad, and when unflattering photos of him emerge from your little Italian vacation, it blows a man-sized hole in his ego and he decides to pump the breaks on it all. He has to go back to shooting the show that made him, his only active gig, so he has a stern conversation with you and his friends that their little performance as his background characters is over. You're on your own from now on, kids. But it's okay, because now you've amassed your own followers and you can troll them all by your lonesome. All publicity is good publicity, right?

So now it's up to you to do his dirty work for him. You don't post him, but you insinuate his presence. You hint. You imply. He's trained you so well! The online trolls who are wishing for the demise of your relationship? Yeah, you'll show them! You took him home to Cyprus! You got a free vacation to a luxury resort in Spain out of him! You're winning! You're a star! Or are you?

Meanwhile, any and all mention of you disappears from his PR. All those links to your socials in the tabloids? Yeah, buried deep in his SEO. He makes sure to tell the world he's no pushover. But you're still the girlfriend, right? Yeah, you're only rumored for now, but he's moved you into the home that he owns, where he pays all the bills and for all your outings and whatnot. He's serious about you. You're living large when otherwise you'd be in a houseshare with 7 other wannabe dancers. But you're fully integrated into his private life, so you're winning, right? Even though he keeps you far away from his costars, especially the one he shoots uncomfortably realistic sex scenes with. The one whose boobs he can't help but stare at. The one who the whole world wants him to be with, even though they now don't like him because of his association with you. And now it's gotten to a point where as far as the public is concerned, you don't exist. But he posts photos that you took and he takes you on family trips in dingy caravan parks, so it's okay, right? Right?

So maybe one day you wake up and you've matured. You've become wise to the world. You start to see men for who they are and how you're just a means to an end to them. A utensil. A prop. But you're unwilling to give up the lifestyle he provides for you, so you stay. You won't give the world the satisfaction of knowing you were played. After all, you're a winner, and winners don't quit, right? So you'll see this mess through to the end. You'll milk it for all it's worth because, let's face it, your other options are worse. I mean, the Beyonces of the world are standing by their trifling men, that's the name of the game, and you knew the rules all along, right? Maybe one day soon you'll get to dance in the background of one of the biggest shows in the world and it'll be worth it. All for the low, low price of your self-worth and your dignity.

But you'll never admit to the downsides of your situation because that would mean you had no say in it, and you'd never allow such degradation. As long as you pretend that you're winning, that's all that matters. But sis, if someone is paying for your life, especially a celebrity who could theoretically get any woman he likes and he's settling for you, that isn't out of the goodness of his heart. You're living on his terms. You're an employee. Whatever he says, goes. And you have an implicit understanding of this, but you'd never own up to it, because that would mean the trolls would've won, and you'd never give them the satisfaction. So you stay, you play along, you do your job. He hides you harder and harder because he can't stand people not liking him and he's realized that as long as they think he might be single, they'll love him again. He posts his thirst traps and they drool all over him again, and he likes it. Then one day he grows tired of you and your expectation of reciprocity and he discards you. He finds someone who serves him better than you. Game, set, match.

And now you have nothing to show for it. You're back to square one, except now you have a swarm of relentless haters who will follow each and every one of your future endeavors just to shit on them. You'll never be able to escape it. You'll never be able to escape him. Especially when he dates or even marries someone "respectable", someone the public likes him for being with. The snark will be in your tags, not his. His face will be on giant posters all over the tube as you trek across town to your next audition for BDSM-inspired dances held in a dodgy warehouse. His bare chest will be on TV when you call your parents to ask them to spot you that month's rent. You'll crawl back to Raya but you'll quickly realize how limited your options are and how stiff the competition. But you'll chug along, smile for the camera, dance for your subscribers. They will never see you sweat. But sweetheart, they've been seeing it all along, since, unlike you, they weren't born yesterday. They see right through you, because you weren't the first, and you certainly won't be the last to get suckered in. You didn't write The Tragedy of the Cool Girl, you were just in the latest off-off-Broadway production of it. And you won't win any awards for it because the patriarchy doesn't give out any. It just takes and it takes and it takes.

Disclaimer. Neither ddg Anon nor myself know these people. This is our opinion and theory based on observations of publicly displayed behaviour of the people referred to in the post.

Ugh, ddg Anon, of course I want to post this.

It's perfect as it is, I just would like to add some personal notes about my own process.

I didn't give Ant to much grace due to the attention seeking behaviour she demonstrated. I did not like the fact she participated in pap walk making Nic and the Polin story look like a fraud. But it was all at the back of my mind that whatever unrelatable she seems to be, she is young. An adult, but a very young one. Along the lines you wrote.

And I had this feeling since pap walk that she is used, I also wrote about it, calling her a "prop" or an "accessory". And she is used for his image relaunch seemingly with the consent of her parents (see dm incident of her mother).

But I don't want to repeat everything that you wrote much better than I ever could. I just want to state that I agree, this is a very plausible scenario of events you described.

And the phenomenom we all see all the time. Patriarchy at it's best. Ofc this case is by far not the worst one. But it's one of the many, and this was very prominently featured. And it bothers me how women are applauding and defending this. How they buy the "show" they are presented.

Someone - who would like to stay anonymus - sent me receipts of the ig handles of the girls he followed (and the follows) and whose posts he liked during his HBS. I will not share it bc I dont want to expose the girls.

10 of them. All young girls with a very specific look. He didn't waste too much time, I have to give it too him. He was casting "Ms. Model Girfriend" hard.

And these were not even the ones that the troll account posted this summer. That was extra 5. Within a relatively short time frame.

Is this the way you find love? Hitting on girls all look alikes one after the other? I don't think so.

I don't like the fact he humiliated Nic at the premiere with rolling out a "model" gf. (yes, even if he didn't set it up, he could have easily avoid it). I don't like the fact he hitted on very young girls repeteadly, showing that he wants to date a very specific type. Not one he can build a balanced relationship with. But someone he has potential power over, who depends on him financially.

I don't like the fact that after rolling her out, he does not claim the relationship. Let her take a lot of hate, while she is still alleged gf.

One thing though I can imagine even within the frame of what ddg Anon wrote : certain men even marry their "employees" , if it fits their interest. And then do whatever they want on the side.

Until they find a girl like A, they will do this. And unfortunately, they always do. To the future As. There is always a price you pay for the perks, always. It's not for free, you will see.

But it is only women who can change this.

It's on us, ladies. Patriarchy will not go away if we support it. It's simply too good for most men. They have too many priviledges, they don't want to give up, until we force them to

And women supporting this, by participating or by applauding, they think they will receive the privileges too. Maybe they do, but only for a limited time. Then they pay the price of it.

I know its an utopia, but maybe, one day, step by step. Me too happened, a lot of things happened, so there is hope.

Uff, I've spoken.

Thank you ddg Anon 💯🏆

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