#ooh watch them send that teddy guy

[miyku]

[faustianbroker]

TIMING: Recent LOCATION: Somewhere in town PARTIES: Gabagool & Dīs (@disinfernus) SUMMARY: Gabs happens upon a half-glamoured Dīs, and thinks that they should very much meet Leviathan. For reasons. Definitely not blackmail reasons.  CONTENT WARNINGS: none.

—

What a life of luxury. Splitting his time between the shop and the house, the little badalisc wanted for nothing. He was fed, brushed, bathed and loved by the Leviathan and its child, dear Teddy, who both treated him with the respect he so deserved. He was more than a pet to them, he was family. And family, well, they looked out for one another. So, as it trundled through town that evening to sniff out gossip, it did so with the intention of taking whatever it heard back to the Leviathan, so the greater demon could use the information as it saw fit.

Keeping mostly to the shadows of alleyways and the above-eye-level safety of fire escapes, Gabagool was able to move from building to building, peeking in windows and pressing his little ears to glass to see what he could hear. Nothing interesting, nothing interesting… ooh, that guy was stealing money from his boss. That could be something! Filing it away for further investigation, Gabagool was about to shimmy down the fire escape when a sound made him snap to attention. Someone was in the alley below, looking flustered and like they were trying to hide something. Gabagool loved people who were trying to hide things. 

Dropping himself down to the next lowest platform of the rickety, rusty fire escape, the lesser demon watched as large antlers appeared on the human’s head. Ahh, not so human after all! Juicy.

“Nice rack ya got there,” he called down to the other, wearing a wide, toothy, cheshire grin. “Sure would be a shame if the wrong sorta fella saw them, wouldn’t it?”

___

Glamours were nothing new to the fae population in general, but they were new to Dīs. They’d practiced when they were younger and they knew what to do to produce a successful facade, but they didn’t have the skill to keep it consistent. Not for hours and certainly not under duress, the latter of which followed the frustrated fae so faithfully out into the frigid evening. They wanted answers and all they managed to get so far were ‘I don’t know’ and ‘I had nothing to do with it’.

Absolutely vexed, Dīs hurried into the nearest alley and lingered by its mouth. With their back pressed to an adjacent wall, Dīs forced their face into the palm of their hands and huffed out an annoyed groan. They became aware of how their mask slipped and distorted along with their emotions, but they had no idea how far the human appearance fell — they couldn’t tell. But someone else could, it seemed, judging by the voice that interrupted their little pity party.

Dīs’ attention went straight to the source — a diminutive creature with an extensively knowing grin. They didn’t like the way it looked at them. They didn’t like the threat, either, even if they had no idea what the little cretin meant by ‘rack’ — Oh. 

It only took them a flash of a second to realize, but it was long enough to morph Dīs’ expression from one of confusion to anger. They most certainly didn’t appreciate the threat now. Long arms crossed over exposed chest as brows buried downward, effectively wrinkling the space between them. “It would be, yes,” Dīs returned stiffly. A tense beat. “What do you want?”

—

“Ohh, don’t be so cranky!” He hefted his rotund body up off of the metal, strutting toward the staircase down to the first level, rubbing his side up against the bars like a cat. “I just think you’re neat, that’s all!” Hopping down the steps to the lowest level of the fire escape, the ungainly creature perched his front paws on the ladder that would drop to the cobblestone below with enough force. Instead, though, he angled his gaze at the stranger again, that eerie smile never leaving his wide face. “What’s your name, friend?” With a hop, he disengaged the ladder, sending it sliding with a loud, grating sound, until it locked into place again and made the whole structure tremble. Unfazed, Gabagool began the careful descent to the ground, going headfirst, one paw in front of the other with a surprising amount of control over his balance. 

“C’mon,” he continued, leaping the last few feet down to the cobblestone and plopping his butt down, tilting his head at the other. His stature was something like that of a medium-sized dog breed, but much differently shaped. “I’m just a little guy. Can’t we be pals?”

—

Cranky wasn’t the half of it, but they kept that tidbit to themself. Dīs didn’t want to give the prying sprite any more personal information — the creature already had the most important one of all and that alone could be devastating. What would it take to keep their entire identity a secret? They watched as their impromptu visitor expertly clambered down from their perch. No, Dīs certainly didn’t like them at all. They wrinkled their nose at the goading, feeling entirely irritated, but made no move to put any distance between them. As much as they detested to be made to feel small, they needed to see this through.

“Is that how you make friends? With threats?” It certainly was one way to get someone’s attention, but Dīs didn’t want friends. They didn’t need friends, especially not ones so brazen and sneaky. Those sorts only meant trouble. Now, trouble could be fun, but not at their own expense. 

—

The badalisc’s ears flicked forward, that wide, toothy grin only expanding. “Sometimes,” he purred. “You didn’t answer my question. What’s your name? I mean, I can figure it out on my own, but I’d rather you just tell me. Less work, and all.” The lesser demon pranced over to them, mismatched eyes staring up at them with some sort of malicious intent buried deep beneath that glittering smile.

“I just like antlers, maybe. And I’m not the wrong sorta fella! I’m a very nice fella. Haven't heard anything about you in town, though… you must be so careful. I bet that’s tiring. Aren’t you tired?” It was difficult to discern if there was more to the words, or if they were just that—words. Gabagool gave the air a long, deep sniff, then nodded. “Yeah… you’re tired. And stressed. What’s stressing you out, buddy? You can tell your good friend Gabs.”

—

Dīs very much didn’t like the position they’d found themselves in, but what were they supposed to do? The little creature had their face — and their secret — by the balls and they couldn’t see an immediate way out without playing along, no matter how fast their mind worked through the possibilities. None of them worked. Dīs sucked in their cheeks and bit down. The side effects of lying were less than savory, but they wondered if they could get away with it. Did it even matter? They didn’t know what exactly he was capable of, but they did believe him when he said he would find out. That could prove worse for them in the long run than if they just removed the so-called band aid right then and there. Shitty options proved for a shitty outcome, regardless.

Dīs pulled their crossed arms closer to their chest, their muscles tight, but they held their gaze steady, unwavering. They seemed confident, stubborn almost, if it hadn’t been for how plainly their body language exposed their discomfort. “Dīs,” they answered curtly. “I don’t suppose you’d offer me the same courtesy and give me your name in return?” It was worth a shot. A shot in the dark, but they couldn’t not try. It was their nature.

“No.” Yes. Yes, they were tired. Everything was so much easier when you were in control and no one questioned anything, nor really needed anything from you — Dīs had it all. Now all they had left was death, ruin, and unanswered questions. Their thick brows furrowed down, darkening the shadow that covered their piercing, golden stare. They looked very much as if they’d smelled something foul. “... You are not my friend. Just—” Dīs reached up with a hand to massage at the space between their brows in frustration and sighed. “Tell me what you want. I’m not much of a fan of small talk.”

—

“Ah, ah, ah,” Gabagool clicked his tongue, narrowing his eyes at the tall creature. “Won’t be falling for that, now. Smarter than your average bear, I’m afraid. I’ll tell you my name when I’m good and ready, friend.” 

“You shouldn’t lie. I hear it gives fae tummy aches,” the demon teased, lifting a paw to bite at a nail for a second before continuing the small talk that Dïs, lovely Dïs, hated so much. “You know, I’ve heard that fae are ancestors of demons. How does that make you feel, Dïs? Less-than? Pathetic?” He bit out the last word, baring his sharp little teeth in a sneer. “Well, you shouldn’t. You should be proud to be a dilution of the great ones. I know I am. My great one, my master… oh, it’s the greatest. Just the swellest fella you’d ever meet. And it likes knowing about the interesting people in this town. I’d say you’re pretty interesting, Dïs. It’d probably love to know you. And did you know, it likes helping people? Tired people, like you. Stressed people. It likes helping them, for a price. It could help you, I bet.” A beat. “Or it could make your life hell. But I guess that’s up to you. You should introduce yourself, and soon! I’ll be telling it all about this little encounter. It’ll want to meet you.”

—

Missed by a mile. Ah well, that was expected. What did they all like to say? ‘No harm in trying’, right? But Dīs was pretty sure they didn’t factor demons into the equation. They’d have to notate the failure in case they thought about trying again — just don’t do it. There was always the possibility that it could backfire and right then, it felt like it had.

Tummy aches were the least of Dīs’ worries. Blackmail was a much more pertinent matter to attend to. While they had a certain degree of admiration for how slickly they’d been pulled into the ruse, they didn’t like to be on the other end of the stick. Especially not when there were more facets at play. Dīs would have preferred to hash this out in the alley, to get this over and done with so they could go home, but that didn’t seem like an option and they weren’t stupid enough to push it. 

The look of distaste and irritation were evident across Dīs’ face. “Fine,” they piped up after that sickly monologue. They had no real world experience with demons, nothing other than the words they now failed to remember from old texts — it was nothing that could help them, anyway. Dīs dropped their arms to their side, looking very much like a defiant child with their hands balled into fists. “Where can I find… your master?”

—

Grinning from ear to little ear, the badalisc was mighty pleased with himself, clearly. “Oh, Leviathan is everywhere,” he answered unhelpfully at first, with a mischievous glint in those mismatched eyes. After a beat, he cackled. “I’m kidding! It likes to work out of the cozy back room in Mephisto’s Repository, most days. I could show you its house, but I don’t know how it would take an unexpected guest. Might bite you right in half! It likes to do that, too. Says fae have a silly kinda cotton-candy aftertaste. Isn’t that fun?” 

Gabagool got to his paws, jerking his head in the opposite direction out of the alleyway. “I can take you to the shop, if you want, new friend… or you can go home and think about how to best make yourself useful to us. For now. Just know that I’m very good at finding people, and Leviathan is not an especially patient demon when it comes to wrangling new… mmm… minions.”

__

They knew of the place. As a fellow collector, there were plans of visiting the shop but they hadn’t gotten around to it since surfacing. Now it seemed, they had no choice but to follow through. The theatrics were unnecessary but expected and the threat was taken to heart. With a name like that, they believed the demon could indeed bite them in half — or worse. “Thrilling,” they returned dryly. They didn’t even like cotton-candy; was it true? Dīs wasn’t about to find out.

Minion. The word alone made Dīs’ upper lip curl into a grimace. They didn’t like being on the other end of that stick. It made them feel small and powerless, like a worm. “No,” they answered in return, “I know where the Repository is. Let them know I will be by tomorrow, then.” And if that day didn’t work, then they were sure Leviathan’s pet would pass it along to Dīs. That thought made them nervous; they didn’t like to be known.

—

“Okie dokey, pokey,” Gabagool said in a singsong voice, one that didn’t match the wicked sneer on his face. “We’ll be seeing you tomorrow, then, good friend. And hey, remember—you are what you eat! So make sure you really like what you’re eating.” It was… a curious choice of words, though if one considered that the badalisc might not mean it so very literally, then it carried yet another kind of threat, veiled behind absurdity. That was the lesser demon’s way, after all. 

Without further ado, the badalisc trotted off deeper into the alley, scaling a different set of window AC units to the fire escape, which led him back to the roof. 

He liked to feel tall.

[missmorosis]

Day at the Carnival

hi yall~ this is a request from my love @urmomoness​ omg DUDE I LOVE YOU 

I’m so so so sorry this took like a week to do, it was honestly so so weird- I’m gross at flirting and honestly I hate how this turned out IM SO SORRY

also hehe excited for this fic exchange thingy we set up 😌

urmomoness asked:

okay from the prompt thing in your masterlist 

hear me out hear me out 

sokka x reader,,,, #1 & #11 from the fluff stuff

#1: “Go with me?” “As long as you hold my hand.”

#11: “Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?”

This is suuchhhhh a cute combo and I feel like I didn’t do it any justice AHHHH!! THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING!

Pairing: Sokka x reader (my fav pairing omg)

Warnings: None :)

Word Count: 1k!

Summary: Sokka and the reader spend a day at the carnival together!

*Set sometime in the future where covid is over!! Stay safe everyone!

Y/N was tired of staying home all the time. When quarantine ended, the first thing she wanted to do was something fun and social, so when she saw an Instagram post for a carnival later that week, she knew that she had to go. She called a “family meeting,” and everyone met in the middle of the living room, waiting for what Y/N had to say. Katara and Sokka made their way over to the couch, plopping down with some snacks in their hands, whereas Aang, Toph, and Zuko sat down onto the carpeted floor.

“OKAY. So, y’all know how we haven’t done anything outside our home for a while, right?” Everyone nodded. “Guess what I found.” She eagerly whipped out her phone and scrolled to the carnival advertisement post.

“It can be something fun for us to do together! Please?” She looked at everyone. “Go with me?”

“Only if you hold my hand,” Sokka wiggled his eyebrows at her, causing her to roll her eyes.

“Sure, it’ll be fun!” Katara and Aang began scheduling it onto their phones’ calendars, and Zuko nodded, signaling his approval.

“Why not?” Toph shrugged. Y/N clapped her hands in excitement. They were going to the carnival!

✧･ﾟ: *✧

Everyone stood outside the bustling carnival, unsure where to start. Sokka grabbed Y/N’s hand instantly and gravitated towards the food, dragging Y/N along. Aang and Zuko headed to the Hall of Mirrors, whereas Toph and Katara dispersed from the group to take funny photos of each other in the photo booth. 

“Ooh, funnel cakes! Y/N look! Cotton candy!” Sokka jumped at the sight of all of the food the carnival offered. “Hot dogs!” Sokka grabbed two hot dogs, handing one to Y/N. “Sorry, I guess you only need the sausage, since you already got them buns.” He winked, and Y/N groaned. “I’m just joking!” He put his hands up in surrender, and Y/N slapped his arm in response.

By the end of a short 10-minute walk, Sokka and Y/N were full of sweet carnival treats, and Sokka’s eyes lit up once again as soon as he saw the carnival games.

“I need to get you a teddy bear!” He eagerly pulled her arm, making her laugh. “Come on!” He led her to a bright red and yellow booth. “Ring toss!”

“You know those things are rigged, right? There’s no way you’re going to win.” She rolled her eyes, but Sokka shook his head.

“What kind of carnival date would this be if the boyfriend didn’t get the girlfriend the classic carnival teddy bear?” He gave her a goofy grin as he walked up to the man running the ring toss game. 

“One try please.” He spoke in that “Wang Fire” voice that Y/N always found hilarious, and this time was no exception. She giggled as he tried his best to toss the ring onto one of the pins. Squinting in focus, Sokka threw as accurately as he could, and surprisingly, it landed smack onto the middle pin. Y/N’s mouth swung open. Sokka gave her a quick “I told you I could do it” look before turning back to the man.

“Congratulations, choose your prize!” The man gestured to the rows of prizes, and Sokka picked out a blue teddy bear. He grabbed it in his hands and handed it to her. 

“See, you were wrooong,” he sang in a sing-song voice, smiling. “What are you gonna name it?” His face lit up. “OH OH, NAME IT SOKKA JR.”

“No way.” She shook her head, laughing. 

“Please? I got it for you,” he pouted.

“Nope. I’m naming it… Katara Jr.” He gasped, offended.

“KATARA JR?!? Come on, I’m at least better than Katara,” he argued.

“Are you sure about that?” She grinned at his insulted facial expression.

She would never tell him, but she knew that Sokka Jr. was the perfect name. She would treasure it forever.

✧･ﾟ: *✧

The sun was now setting in the sky, the sky darkening with streaks of pink and orange. It was the perfect setting to end the day. Everyone was full, happy, and ready to get back home, but they agreed to get one Ferris wheel ride together. 

“One ticket per person, please.” The woman running the Ferris wheel held her hand out to collect the tickets.

Looking to Y/N, Sokka turned and whispered, “You don’t need a ticket to ride me!” Y/N ignored him and instead placed two tickets in the lady’s palm; one for her and one for Sokka. The woman let them in, and the two sat down in the Ferris wheel basket. They slowly moved up, and they heard the rest of their friends (except for Toph, who stayed behind) get into the basket behind them. They went higher and higher, watching the sunset together.

“You know, this is really beautiful. And I’m not talking about the sunset.” His voice broke the silence, loud enough for Y/N to hear, but not enough for the others to know what he was saying.

“Are- are you flirting with me?” She looked at him.

“You finally noticed?” Sokka kept his eyes trained on Y/N’s face, making Y/N blush. She had noticed, but she didn’t make much of it at the time. Here, it felt… different.

“Can… can I kiss you?”

“I’ve been waiting all day.” He gently leaned in to give her a soft kiss on the lips, and Y/N ate it up. As soon as he let go, she leaned in once again, longing for another kiss, and Sokka of course accepted. Behind them, someone groaned. Y/N whipped her head back to see Aang, Katara, and Zuko watching them. Y/N buried her hands in her sleeves out of embarrassment, but Sokka brought her back out, his finger pulling out her chin.

“Who cares?” He kissed her again, and again, laughing against her lips.

✧･ﾟ: *✧

After they got home, Y/N plopped onto the bed, her body sighing at the cold sheets beneath her. She carefully set Sokka Jr. next to her and kissed the teddy bear goodnight before heading off to bed herself.

She had a great time at the carnival.

hello and welcome to today’s edition of i hate it i hate it i hate it! :D

N E WAYS i hope you enjoyed (somewhat) annndd ILY!!

surprisingly i have a tag list now!! send an ask to join! taglist: @zuko-is-the-sun​ @urmomoness​ hehehe i love you guys :)

feel free to send me more requests!! rules are in my blog navigation!

[homespork-review]

Homespork Act 4, Part 2: Flight of the Paradox Groans

BRIGHT: Remember Spades Slick being bizarrely aware he was in a comic, back in the Intermission? Buckle up, things are about to get even more fourth-wall-breaking. Appropriately, this starts by the comic focusing on an actual fourth wall, which activates to show...Andrew Hussie.

Hussie’s MS Paint avatar notices the audience watching him, laments that his side of the wall doesn’t have an off switch, and then recaps the first year of Homestuck.

Now, in all fairness: The recap is thorough, full of links, and explains things fairly well. It’s quite long, but given how much territory it has to cover I’m not sure it could be any shorter. So it does its job well, and it’s a boon if you’re getting lost with the plot.

As for the author insertion...on this occasion I don’t mind it. It comes across as tongue-in-cheek, but framed more as the author talking to the reader than as the author inserting himself into the narrative. It’s definitely very Homestuck.

Anyway, AH gets back to work, and after a couple of false starts we return to John!

John is still flying around with his jet pack. GC trolls him to offer him a world map of LOWAS and tell him she feels awful about killing him, although in literally the next line she tells him that technically he never even died so she doesn’t understand why he’s so upset. John understandably finds this disturbing. They have a brief nonsensical discussion about Jesus/Jegus, and then John agrees to go take a look at what’s on the other side of his Second Gate. Yes, on the advice of someone whose previous advice got him killed.

CHEL: Almost a shame we didn’t set up a Too Dumb To Live count, but then to be fair that was a separate timeline and he’s probably not thinking of it as something that “really” happened. This is supported by his later dialogue.

FAILURE ARTIST: The word Jegus is really popular in the Homestuck fandom, used far more often than it is in the canon. Gets quite annoying, in my opinion. Actually, a rather Jesus-like figure does appear, but he’s not called “Jegus”.

CHEL: Yeah, I think only Terezi, John, and Dave ever use the term, but it somehow became latched onto as an actual term used by trolls in general, even though in canon it isn’t.

BRIGHT: Fortunately, this time GC appears to be playing nice. John flies though the Second Gate and emerges...into LOLAR?

FAILURE ARTIST: Hussie does an amusing trick where he has what looks like a loading screen for a flash but it’s actually a still image eternally at 2%.

BRIGHT: Yes, it’s LOLAR. John promptly crashes into Rose’s house, smashing through a wall and into her bedroom, where Rose is still snoozing in her knitting pile. Apart from briefly being stuck upside down, he does not appear injured by this collision.

Rose has somehow slept through the commotion. John decides to let her rest and borrows her computer to talk to Dave.

The first one he talks to is actually Davesprite, who points out how moronic John was to listen to GC again. No arguments here! Then he explains how the Gate system works: Odd-numbered Gates, above players’ houses, lead to somewhere on their planets. Even-numbered Gates lead to other players’ planets, exiting over their houses. Normally they aren’t meant to go through even-numbered Gates until the houses are built up, so they don’t fall to their deaths, but fortunately John has a jetpack workaround. So far Davesprite is living up to his promise of being straightforward.

John realises he’s talking to Future Dave, and asks “do you think i could talk to the real dave for a second?”

...ouch, John.

Davesprite goes off on a tear, ranting that he is a real Dave — arguably the realest Dave, since he’s been running around LOHAC for months trying to get enough information to save everyone. John apologises sincerely.

CHEL: This won’t be the last we hear of this theme, though.

EB: i think i pissed off your future self. TG: what did you do EB: i said he wasn't the real dave. TG: ahahahahaha EB: i think i might have really hurt his feelings though! TG: pff TG: dont worry about it EB: why not? TG: cause i wouldnt give a shit TG: and hes me

BRIGHT: Not a hundred percent sure I believe Dave, there.

CHEL: Dave uses John to snoop around Rose’s room and get the captcha code for her journals. Classy, Dave. Not a SLAMMER point, however, as this does come back to bite him very soon.

Rose’s dreamself has awoken on Derse, the purple planet, and flies across to the opposite tower. Dave’s dreamself appears to be awake, sitting upright in his computer chair; the room is entirely an unsettling bloody red colour apart from the SBaHJ cartoons on the walls, and… oh shit, there’s Lil Cal again, now in a long purple nightdress and hopping around the room on his own. If Rose was having nightmares because of dreamself issues, I can only imagine how Dave’s nightmares must look. Rose throws a ball of yarn at Dave’s dreamself, alerting him, and causing the awake Dave to pass out.

Back in Rose’s room, it seems that Charles Barkley quote was not misattributed:

FAILURE ARTIST: Another SBaHJ reference in the book quote. Is that where Dave got it?

Still, I don’t recall this book ever coming up again. Just another item that seems like a Chekhov's Gun but isn’t.

CHEL: John feels guilty about opening his birthday gift from Rose, but reasons that it’s technically now his anyway, so he does, finding another bunny, this one black and filthy-looking except for the pristine knitted purple patches repairing it, though its shape is eerily familiar.

The gift in this box is a resurrection. I used your present to thread life anew into a tattered heirloom. As long as I can remember, its black, greasy appendages have been tethered limply to its ratty, porous carriage. Too delicate to wash, too dear to discard. I used to love this rabbit. Now he's yours. I trust you'll find this to be adequately sentimental. Happy birthday.

Oh my gosh, awwwwww. Even if you don’t ship them romantically how can you not love their interactions? Definitely one of the comic’s strong points. Also I need to go hug my childhood teddy bear.

John puts the bunny back in the box again and the box in his sylladex, freeing Casey the salamander while he’s at it. And let’s just take a minute to feel utter horror because dead John still had Casey in his sylladex, so the best option is that she died too, and the worst is that we have an And I Must Scream situation on for a baby salamander. Gah.

FAILURE ARTIST: Thanks, I’d never thought of that and I never want to again.

You aren't actually sure if she is a girl though. You don't even know if salamanders can be girls. Aren't they hermaphrodites or something?

CHEL: No, for the record. Though some frogs can switch from one to the other.

FAILURE ARTIST: Casey is very popular as a name for an OC child of John (often having Rose as the mother).

CHEL: John answers Rose’s Pesterchum, upon which GA is half-heartedly sending antagonistic messages. John answers on Rose’s account, saying that Rose is asleep, which GA takes for Human Sarcasm, prompting John to pretend to be Rose.

GA: I Should Figure Out How The Viewport Feature Of This Application Works GA: So I Can See What Such A Primitive Creature Looks Like TT: haha, well i know what you guys look like. TT: you look kind of like... TT: howie mandel from little monsters.

Wait, how does he know? Am I forgetting a point at which he saw them?

BRIGHT: I always assumed that he was just goofing around and his guess happened to land in the right ballpark, but thinking about it, I’m not sure the kids ever express surprise at the trolls’ appearance.

CHEL: John, pretending to be Rose, talks about how awesome John is.

GA: He Is Either The Leader Of Your Party Or You Hold Whatever The Human Equivalent Of Mating Fondness For Him Is

CHEL: Both. Both is good!

FAILURE ARTIST: Knowing what we do of troll culture later this is an odd statement. Heck, it’s just an odd statement. Maybe this is why people think trolls don’t do friendship.

CHEL: John apparently confuses GA by saying it’s because Rose is thoughtful and John appreciates his gift, and suggests GA talk to John.

TT: why don't you pick the time that will make the most complicated mess out of everything imaginable?

GA sounds very annoyed, and leaves, intending to have the conversation with John that she had previously. We see her, GC, and the horns of AT and an unknown troll in the grey room, now revealed to be a computer laboratory. For some reason she chats via Pesterchum with another troll instead of just walking over to talk to them. This new troll is twinArmageddons, an appropriate name for the circumstances, who type2 iin yellow text liike thii2; he is, as it turns out, the hacker guy GC mentioned earlier. TA is busy setting up the network and seems irritable in general, and is not willing to help GA work her viewport.

TA: iif ii 2ee one more 2narl of wiire2. TA: kiind of juttiing out and beiing tangled or whatever. TA: ii am goiing two perform 2ome 2ort of athletiic fuckiing 2omer2ault off the deep end and get a call from the pre2iident or 2ome 2hiit.

Nice callback, but trolls, as we’ll later find out, don’t have presidents.

WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 14

GA wonders why TA doesn’t want to talk to her, and TA complains that he knew in advance the trolls were doomed and no one believed him. He refuses to troll the humans himself but is setting up the system so the others can in order to get them to leave him alone. GA asks again for help, to no avail.

TA: iif you cant fiigure 2hiit out by fuckiing around you dont belong near computer2. TA: kiind of liike wiith regii2tered 2ex offender2 and 2chool2. TA: iif you move two a new town you have two go up two your neiighbor2 door and warn them about how 2tupiid you are. TA: and giive them a chance two hiide all theiir iinnocent technology. TA: and vandaliize your hou2e.

Ooh, a threefer plus one! Tacky simile for the Problematykks. As for WSP, we’ll later find out that 1) trolls kill all their criminals, 2) trolls don’t give a shit about the welfare of their children, and 3) trolls don’t appear to actually go to school. These two counts are neck and neck in the lead now!

CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 17 WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 17

BRIGHT: As with much of Homestuck, the trolls give the impression of being made up as Hussie went along. That’s not entirely a bad thing -- it certainly makes the comic pretty unique -- but it does lead to some out-of-place slip-ups.

Anyway, GA chucks her F1 key at TA’s head and then starts poking him. We also see CG in the lab.

FAILURE ARTIST: I think I recall GA/TA were a popular ship before we learned more about GA. It does seem like they have a Rose & Dave dynamic going on.

BRIGHT: Back on Derse, Rose and Dave have a dance party to Dave’s music while accompanied by some crows and Lil Cal, who keeps teleporting around the room. Rose eventually gets tired of Cal’s shenanigans and hurls him out of the window, to the relief of many.

FAILURE ARTIST: The flash originally included music by Bill Bolin. In fact, it was his unfinished music being included here that caused all the drama in the first place.

BRIGHT: Time for some random interludes! First up is Maplehoof the pony, who is following Rose’s mother through a large cave which, judging by the grist lying around, recently contained very dangerous monsters.

FAILURE ARTIST: Apparently pets can collect grist for their masters...and know what grist is despite being a normal(?) animal.

BRIGHT: First Mom, and then Maplehoof, stand on a transportaliser platform and disappear. Second is Dad, who has just acquired a replacement shoe and hat (which showed up in the walkaround game, way back at the beginning of the Act), when he encounters a familiar-looking stranger with a Colonel Sassacre book, who leads him to another transportalizer platform. Both of these interludes do become relevant later, but at the time they seem a tad unnecessary.

Meanwhile, John uses Rose’s alchemiter and a code Davesprite gave him mid-rant to produce a truly epic hammer called FEAR NO ANVIL. It’s far too big for John to wield, but fortunately he can use the scaling upgrade on the alchemiter to reduce it to a more useable size. ...wait. When did Rose’s alchemiter get a scaling upgrade? Dave and Jade added a lot of modifications to his, but Rose’s should be the original edition. Sigh.

EB: so what is this? EB: the thing the code made... TG: really powerful hammer EB: how do you know? EB: i thought you couldn't use hammers. TG: i cant TG: better be though TG: got it from hephaestus EB: who's that? TG: really tough to kill dude EB: you killed him for it? TG: nope EB: how'd you get it then? TG: shenanigans EB: ok.

...and we’re back to sprite evasiveness. Davesprite is being less than forthcoming here, although it’s less obvious than with Nannasprite because it superficially imitates John and Dave’s bantering.

CHEL: Now, this would be a good way of keeping us interested if we were eventually going to see how he did it, and also they have a time limit, so not going off into a long anecdote would be understandable. However, we’ll see how his evasiveness level proceeds in the future.

BRIGHT: Dream Rose and Dave see John using Rose’s alchemiter on Dream Dave’s computer. Rose wakes up.

FAILURE ARTIST: It is interesting how early Homestuck avoided having characters have face-to-face conversations. Would have been unique if it kept up throughout the entire comic.

BRIGHT: Back in the meteor, GA hassles TA into opening the viewport on her computer. This turns out to be as simple as clicking on the point in Rose’s timeline that she wants to see. No wonder TA was frustrated!

Of course, by this point, the only one left in the room is Rose, now awake, and the young salamander. Rose hurries to catch up with John, but he blasts off to explore before she can reach him, taking her mutated kitten with him.

CHEL: John renames Vodka Mutini to Dr Meowgon Spengler, and Rose renames Casey to Viceroy Bubbles von Salamancer. Interesting link to the themes of identities which are starting to crop up, though it’s not really a direct analogue. The animals are the same animals with different names; the alternate timeline characters have the same names and superficially the same identities, but are they really the same people after their new experiences?

BRIGHT: Back on Derse, Lil Cal inexplicably lands on a stray rocket board, catching the attention of AR.

You're not sure which laws are being broken, but it is probably a lot.

AR follows Cal to yet another transportaliser, and they both dematerialise.

We jump back to John, who spies a boat on one of the islands dotting LOLAR and lands to investigate. He follows hoofprints in the sand into a subterranean hallway filled with monsters. Fortunately his new hammer has time powers, which stun the monsters long enough for John to kill them. Further on, he finds the transportaliser Mom used. John, naturally, stands on it, and is transported to a meteor in the Veil.

Actually, it’s not just a meteor; it’s one of the laboratories where the Skaian troops are produced. John, along with the cat and Maplehoof, finds a bunch of chess guys being grown in glass jars on a giant podium. Most of them are the standard carapaces we’re familiar with, but there are also a few larger pieces, apparently based on knights and rooks. He also finds a JUNIOR ECTOBIOLOGIST’S LAB SUIT, and another of those strange house-shaped sets of monitors.

On Prospit, PM is preparing to board a shuttle to Skaia when a COURTYARD DROLL sneaks up behind her. Unaccountably, she fails to notice him, despite the fact that he’s wearing a hat larger than he is. CD successfully pickpockets the White Queen’s ring, and PM departs for Skaia, none the wiser.

CD radios the DRACONIAN DIGNITARY to report mission success, and is told that he doesn’t need to keep wearing his ridiculous outfit, per orders from Jack Noir, who is now going by the SOVEREIGN SLAYER. CD says he’d rather keep wearing the outfit. Apart from the sword-through-the-chest part, it is a very nice outfit, so I’m with CD on this one.

Catastrophe is averted by Jade delivering a flying kick to CD’s head and following up with a very efficient smackdown. Her robot body replicates this back on Earth, beating the stuffing out of her mummified grandfather. Jade retrieves the ring, and puts it on her fingers to remind herself to give it back to PM later. Unfortunately, this doesn’t cause Jade to sprout wings and tentacles. Seems the rings don’t work on humans like that.

Meanwhile, in a Timeless Expanse, a WARWEARY VILLEIN is getting tired of the battle between Derse and Prospit. The next animation is called “WV?: Rise Up” and it’s one of my favorites! When I first read Homestuck I had to watch it a few times before I understood what was going on, but it is a very neat video.

Watch on YouTube

The Battlefield has been prototyped three times, and is now spherical. The forces of Derse and Prospit meet. The usual carapaces with swords are backed up by larger pieces -- some of them very strange -- and by battleships clashing in the sky. In the chaos, WV, who is farming peacefully on Skaia, has his home and farm burned down. He raises a flag and addresses the troops of both armies. Elsewhere, Jack Noir appears, flying over the Battlefield in search of the Black King.

WV rallies the armies and tells them that their real enemies are the monarchs, who are responsible for the war. Encouraged, the Dersite and Prospitan troops band together and march on the Black King.

Meanwhile, PM has reached the White King and discovers that she no longer has the White Queen’s ring. The White King listens to her and hands over his scepter, which seems to represent Skaia and serves a similar function to the Queens’ rings. Behind a nearby hill, the Hegemonic Brute radios somebody to report the transfer.

As WV and the united armies reach the Black King, Jack arrives and slices the Black King’s scepter in half, nullifying its powers and turning the Black King back into a normal carapace. PM is attacked by HB, who knocks the White King’s scepter out of her hand; it falls down a waterfall. Jack Noir beheads the Black King and turns to WV, and the animation ends.

...okay, much as I love it, I have to admit there’s a glaring question here: Namely, the kids started playing the Game less than a day ago and Dave’s kernelsprite has been prototyped for a few hours max. The second prototyping made the Battlefield more complex and the third took it into its current form. That’s a very short time to instigate a cross-faction revolution, organise the troops, and march on a monarch. For that matter, how long has WV been a farmer? The inhabitants of Derse and Prospit have obviously been doing their thing all the kids’ lives, but the Battlefield was supposedly a static, rudimentary space until John entered the Medium, so what gives?

Then again, the timeline in the Medium is supposed to be distinct from the timeline on Earth, so maybe that explains it?

CHEL: An interesting point is also raised by WV’s revolution. Namely, Derse is presented as a kingdom of darkness and evil by the game, while Prospit is presented as good. However, while PM is good, WV and AR are demonstrably not bad people either. In this animation, we see carapaces of both sides apparently don’t want to be involved in the war and are willing to rise up against the Black King. The rank-and-file carapaces on both sides, it seems, are decent people who are just following orders. (Not to mention very cute.) Jack Noir and his gang are nasty pieces of work, except CD who’s also just kind of going along with it, but there’s nothing saying white carapaces couldn’t also be… And is that a Problematykks point, presenting the black-coloured people as bad and the white-coloured ones as good? I know they’re chess pieces, but still.

This raises the question, however, what’s Derse’s motive? Are its rulers and archagents simply destroying for the evulz? I wonder. I also wonder how much Skaia itself is involved in this and how aware it is. Skaia is called the crucible of creation, and it’s responsible for the creation of the carapaces too. References are made to it “seeing” and “knowing”; it’s quite possibly sentient, though maybe not sapient. On top of that, SBurb is specifically a game, and a game needs an objective, and an adventure-type game needs enemies. Derse, it seems likely, was created and presented the way it is in order to give the players something to battle against even if its people don’t want to be their enemies. No wonder WV’s pissed!

BRIGHT: Yup. Hmm, thinking about it...the imps and other enemies we saw attacking John’s house early on were obviously Dersite, but the ones we’ve seen in Rose’s seem to be Prospitian, if anything? The colour scheme looks that way, at least. But Nanna said earlier that Derse was the enemy, nothing about Prospit.

Perhaps it has something to do with Rose being a Derse dreamer, while John is a Prospit dreamer? But in that case I’d have expected it to come up in the text. Instead it just goes unremarked.

Rose goes on a massive alchemising spree and ends up creating the Thorns of Oglogoth, a pair of wands.

The needles seem to shiver with the dark desires of THE DEEP ONE. Any sane adventurer would cast these instruments of the occult into the FURTHEST RING and forget they ever existed.

Instead of throwing the wands away, Rose takes on the enemies camping all over her house, with style.

Meanwhile, Dave goes on another, less visibly productive alchemising spree.

GET ON WITH IT!: 18

FAILURE ARTIST: The SBaHJifier could be considered productive in that it provides foreshadowing cartoons. Wish Dave’s Brain in a Jar came up again.

BRIGHT: Once he’s done creating smuppet variations to disturb the monsters encroaching on his house, he sits down to take a look at those two journals he copied from Rose earlier. One of them is called ‘MEOW’, and is literally just those same four letters, repeated over and over in different orders. The second is ‘Complacency of the Learned’.

There is no way to adequately recap the beauty of ‘Complacency of the Learned’, so we’re just going to show the whole thing:

Frigglish bothered his beard, as if unkinking a hitch in a long silk windsock. A more pedestrian audience would parse the exhibit as nervous compulsion. Behavior to petition contempt among the reasonable. He was however not surrounded by the reasonable, but the wise, a distinction in men that would forever be the difference in history's garland of treasured follies. As a matter of fact, his cadre of fellow wizards were all putting similar moves on their beards as well. The practice would evince thoughtfulness - sagacity, even - if they didn't do it all the time. Standing in line at the bank. Shooing squirrels from bird feeders. Few occasions were safe. Zazzerpan inspected the clue. A single piece of evidence cradled in his coriaceous old man palms. It was a human bone, not striking in the tale it told alone so much as that told by the thousands like it festooning the marshy soil of the mass grave. The grisly expanse bore the texture of a decadent dessert, like one of Smarny's formidable custard trifles wobbled out on wheels for the holidays, to the dismay of a small nation. "You're certain of this?" asked Frigglish. Despite what he was doing with his beard, he was, in fact, immersed in meaningful contemplation. "I am afraid I am becoming more so with each terrible tick groused by that gaudy timepiece slung around your neck." In case it wasn't clear, Frigglish wore a clock Zazzerpan didn't care for. It was magic. "The massacre of Syrs Gnelph was not as written." "What has you convinced it was the hand of our disciples in this blackness?" Executus chimed in. "I believe... I..." a fat face stammered, eyes darting with the guilt of a thief in the throes of an unraveling alibi. "I can summon a... more pressing line of inquiry..." No, Smarny. Nobody was in the mood for a sticky bundt loaf just now. Zazzerpan's ears fell insubstantial to any line of inquiry, pastry-oriented or otherwise. His abstruse contour carved a pondering shape in the fog carpeting centuries-dead. His eleven contemporaries too embraced the muted consternation of their great Predicant Scholar. Few wizards kept sharper adumbratives or read them with such lucidity. When Zazzerpan treated men with silence it was seldom unrepaid by the wise and reasonable alike. It was harrowing to entertain. Zazzerpan the Learned's storied Complacency of Wizards was marked for grander descendence. Disciples hand-picked, vetted by Ockite the Bonafide and tested by Gastrell the Munificent. The twelve sweetest, most studious children a pair of elderly eyes could give their sparkle. Not the ragged guttersnipe so oft-harvested by the common Obscenity, those vituperative little beggars with hearts to corrupt as dropped bananas brown. That these chosen youngsters would turn was not merely unthinkable, but something of a roundhouse to the temporal bones of the Upper Indifference's high chamber of Softskulled Prophets. His wisdom-savaged brow pruned further with recount of his many lessons to wouldbe successors. Lessons to advance humanity's elucidation and prosperity, an outcome this bleak trail now painfully obviated. There were few puzzles The Learned could not suspend and dissect in the recondite manifold beneath his extremely expensive pointy hat. Daring to pitch his cherished pupils in with the foul melange of history's rogues, the heretofore abstract scourge that built up civilizations with ungodly magic and tore them down with joyful malice, would prove an intellectual trespass to make his calcium-deficient bones quake. And more daring yet was the only question that now mattered. Could a bunch of bearded, scraggly old men in preposterous outfits hunt them down? He didn't have an answer. Only a simple observation so blunt and uncharacteristically jejune for the lauded sage it was breathtaking in its selfevidency. "We're going to need more wands." (Wow. Think of something better.)

Wow.

Dave is understandably intimidated by this, and decides to stop reading for now. He puts his copy of the SBURB Beta in the notebook to act as a bookmark, and leaves both books in his room for later.

Then he checks in on Rose, who is burning her version of the MEOW book.

CHEL: Dave inquires about the wizard story.

TG: i thought you hated wizards TG: whats the deal with that TT: I like wizards. TT: What I don't like is my mother's obsession with feigning interest in them to antagonize me. TG: oh man thats so messed up TG: that you think that TG: she probably digs wizards for real just like you and youre blowing shit out of proportion like pretty much always

Once again, we see exactly how fucked-up Rose’s relationship with her mother is. Mom Lalonde has somehow managed to raise a child in such a way that Rose interprets everything her mother does as an attempt to mock and provoke her.

ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?: 16

TIER: The Lalondes are pretty damn dysfunctional as a family unit, and considering the zany nature of early Homestuck and its world's weird logic that is saying something indeed.

CHEL: As for the MEOW book, it turns out the gods from the Furthest Ring informed Rose while she was sleeping that the book’s contents are highly dangerous and must be destroyed. Said gods dwell in the sky above Derse; Dave’s never heard or seen them, but Rose points out his dreamself is always wearing shades, listening to music, and distracted by Cal.

TT: You're the prince of the moon. TG: ........ TT: I'm sure they've been meaning to seek a royal audience. TG: ..........................

Davesprite chats to Rose next. She protests at being spied on by two people, but Davesprite asks her why she burned the codebook. She didn’t need to in the future, but according to her future memories of the gods absorbed from her future dreamself, Davesprite appeared to make it relevant by traveling to the past. A sinister and familiar face watches through Dave’s window, soon proving to be the Draconian Dignitary, while Dave and Davesprite awkwardly spout elaborate mixed metaphors about how safe they are, until Dave, embarrassed, says "so i guess ill go back down and burn that book".

As any savvy reader could guess, he’s too late. The prompt suggests that he should go back in time to stop the books from being stolen, but, well...

It looks like you already tried that. GORE GALORE: 10

Dave looks completely undisturbed, but whether he is undisturbed is a different matter. He flings the corpse out the window into the lava, claiming it would freak Jade out.

John, in the lab, presses a button, causing the first monitor to depict his town, shortly before his birth. There is a Betty Crocker factory and a shopping mall, neither of which are in the town now. Zooming in locks a target over Nanna Egbert, who is taking a stroll with Dad. A meteor looms; this looks like it’s going to go very badly, considering the target lock, but it hits the factory instead. When John presses the glowing blue button, a PARADOX GHOST IMPRINT of Nanna is created; refer back to Rose’s experimentation in the lab and the green slime blobs. This time, the slime is sucked into a tube.

The next monitor does something similar with Grandpa Harley on his ship, and the next the same with Bro Strider, who stands over a meteor crater on an unseasonably warm day; something of an understatement, as the sky is the same lurid red and the sun the same glowing spiral that they were during the Strider bros’ battle even though it’s December. Bro is, regardless, prepared for the occasion with a small pair of outrageously awesome shades. What he needs these for will soon be revealed.

The fourth monitor goes back to John’s home town, a gigantic crater where the factory once was. In the shopping mall, Dad Egbert stands outside a joke shop, while Nanna apparently remains inside, busying herself with a tall bookshelf, a ladder, and a rather hefty unabridged joke book.

Mom Lalonde, clutching the infant Rose and wearing a rather snazzy long Jaspersprite-pink scarf, has come to town to study the meteor impact at the request of Grandpa Harley while he explores elsewhere. Unfortunately, now is the time a meteor chooses to strike Nanna’s location, destroying the shop.

An old mother lost today, but a new son gained.

Wait for it.

Mom Lalonde flees, dropping her scarf, which Dad Egbert picks up and slightly creepily sniffs. The monitor continues tracking her, and John captures her paradox imprint too, starting the machines whirring away...

Four babies abruptly appear on the pad, already diapered and bespectacled and old enough to sit up unaided. Convenient, no?

When the kitten jumps on a green button, the slime is blended in pairs; Nanna’s and Grandpa’s, and Mom’s and Bro’s. More blinking lights ensue, and another four extremely familiar-looking babies appear.

BRIGHT: I will say this: These kids are adorable.

While babies clamber over him, John vaults up his echeladder to the rank of Ectobiolobabysitter, acquiring one million Boondollars in the process. This automatically converts itself to a Boonbuck, the weight of which smashes his Porkhollow.

Finding out just what is going on here will have to wait, as the comic takes a brief detour to a battleship navigating the Medium nearby. There’s someone very familiar at the wheel…

An old man has much to do before he returns to Earth, dies, gets stuffed by his adopted-yet-biological daughter-slash-grand-daughter, and stuck in front of a fireplace.

Also aboard the ship are Dad Egbert and Mom Lalonde. Dad returns Mom’s scarf, and the two of them hold hands as Grandpa Harley pilots the ship towards Skaia.

We return to the lab, where John has his hands full with the babies. One of them has managed to break one of the paradox slime jars from earlier, but appears uninjured. Also, CG’s trolling him again.

CHEL: CG makes mention of the ULTIMATE RIDDLE, but John is confused because CG hasn’t told him about that yet. He uses an ableist description in explaining.

CG: SEE I KIND OF PAINTED MYSELF INTO A CORNER. CG: I STARTED TROLLING YOU AT THE END, JUST BEFORE THE RIFT. CG: AND THEN JUMPED BACK A LITTLE. CG: AND NOW I GUESS I'VE BECOME RAILROADED INTO WORKING BACKWARDS HERE. CG: UNLESS I WANT TO DO THE SORT OF DUMB SCHIZOPHRENIC HOPPING AROUND LIKE THE OTHERS. CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 18

… why wouldn’t you just hop right back to the start and work in a linear fashion from there?

TIER: Because CG excels at making things complicated for himself and is fundamentally rather stubborn and set in his ways/actions. Like he's made his bed, he's gonna lie in it.

CHEL: Anyway, CG banters with John for a bit, and then informs him that he (John) has arrived in the Veil and created infant versions of the players and their guardians.

EB: so they are like cloned copies of us? CG: NO. CG: THEY ARE LITERALLY YOU AND YOUR GUARDIANS. CG: PARADOX CLONES.

A paradox clone, we are informed, is A CORRECTLY CLONED DUPLICATE THAT WILL INEVITABLY GO BACK IN TIME AND BECOME THE ORIGINAL TARGET THAT WAS CLONED. The game worlds contain many clues hinting at the ultimate destiny of the players to create their own selves through the game, and the only way things could possibly go involved the players creating themselves, or else the game session would never happen.

CG: WHICH IS ESPECIALLY PATHETIC SINCE PARADOX SPACE APPARENTLY WENT TO ALL THIS TROUBLE TO MAKE YOU JUST TO HAVE YOU FAIL AND DIE. CG: REALLY THERE'S NOTHING MORE TRAGIC THAN THESE NULL SESSIONS FULL OF KIDS ENTERING THE GAME AND FULFILLING SOME COSMIC DESTINY SHIT JUST TO GET WIPED OUT AND LEAVE BEHIND AN EMPTY POINTLESS INCIPISPHERE FOR ALL ETERNITY.

Tragic and completely unnecessary, when there are millions of perfectly good humans already in existence who could just as easily create winning game sessions without this aspect of it. Here we see another aspect of Homestuck which hasn’t come up quite so clearly before; an extremely weird take on determinism. I’m not sure if this is meant as a parody of Chosen One plotlines or if Hussie just thought it sounded cool, but it’s uncomfortable. As it turns out, only clones created by SBurb have a hope in hell of winning the game, and even they fail most of the time. Regular people who enter the game to save themselves from the destruction of the planet will fail and die there, which honestly is not really selling this game as a good thing, since it’s what causes the destruction of the planet in the first place. I’ve had actual, legitimate, honest-to-God nightmares about this aspect of SBurb, and I’m not ashamed to admit it.

FAILURE ARTIST: I think many fans wish to play SBurb. There’s lots of fan sessions and fake GameFAQs and custom Lands. Yet in reality SBurb is not a fun time. This is cosmic horror. I think Hussie is sometimes playing it for horror and sometimes he ignores the implications.

Then again, some people want to live on the troll planet, which is straight-up dystopia.

CHEL: Again, it isn’t really clear what he’s going for. Is it supposed to be terrifying or did he just think it would be clever? Does even Hussie know what he was going for? While it’s not exactly a joke, I think it’s worth another point here:

ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?: 17

It might be a joke. As I said, I could see it as a parody of or playing with the Chosen One narrative. In this case, literally only the chosen ones have any hope, for reasons that are not down to any merit of their own. But if it is, there isn’t really much made of it.

Of course, the reasons people want to live on the troll planet are reasonable when taken alone, but a) contradicted every alternate scene and b) not a fair trade for everything else that’s going on there. But we’ll get to that when we actually see it. And I admit, SBurb powers would be fun, but not worth the loss of my entire species.

TIER: To me at least it's fun in the same way wondering how I'd fare as a wizard during Harry Potter's years at Hogwarts, or a ninja in Naruto is. Fundamentally you'd rather want to never encounter this sorta stuff even if you get some swanky I guess powers, but the mental exercise of it is quite honestly, really fun. The game has quite a lot of interesting things to poke around with, from lands to quests to what your co-players are up to. And I'm def guilty of playing trollsona games, because the world presented is just really fascinating in its gruesome glory.

Never want to have to actually go through it, Lord knows I'd be dead within the first ten minutes if I'm super lucky, but stories about it are pretty neat.

CHEL: That’s true, but the paradox clones thing seems almost to be taunting us for having that mentality. We can pretend we’d be the super-smart strong competent ones who make it, but in this universe if we demonstrably have parents we’re doomed to die for nothing and there’s nothing we can do about it.

BRIGHT: Another fun thing about this is that it fundamentally isolates the players from the rest of humanity. If you think about it, unless they have children with a non-player, they are completely unrelated to anyone else on Earth.

CHEL: And they can’t have kids with a non-player unless something thoroughly horrible happened, because as is stated later SBurb specifically takes its players away and destroys their planet around the point of their puberty.

BRIGHT: Although I think John is actually related to Dad — as far as we’re told, Dad is in fact Nanna’s biological son, which makes him genetically John’s half-brother.

They also miss out on (going by how active the babies are) the first couple of years of life. Those two years are crucial in terms of brain development. SBURB probably controls for that, but it wouldn’t be surprising if there were negative consequences.

Oh, and if you’re a player, your existence means your civilisation is doomed. Lovely!

CHEL: And do the players ever feel any guilt or conflict over this? Do they hell. It doesn’t even occur to them, and I’m pretty sure it didn’t occur to Hussie either.

TIER: Welcome to the hell game that is SBURB; it's fundamentally pretty fucked up! It runs on a hellish scale of "things have already been predetermined" and I am Big Fear™.

CHEL: That’ll come up later, too, but there it’s obviously intentional nightmare fuel, and not at all a bad use of time travel as a story device.

CG, meanwhile, explains that he was the one to create his session’s players. With twelve of them it was a bit more complicated, but troll lineages are complicated anyway, and we’ll find out how later.

The babies are still getting all over the lab. Note that they're repeatedly referred to as "little pink monkeys". Then again, calling a non-white child a monkey really wouldn't be good.

WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 18

John’s infant self has latched onto the Sassacre book, while his infant Nanna is sitting in Dad Egbert’s old hat. Baby Bro is napping in the lap of Lil Cal; that baby’s braver than I am, I can tell you that. Baby Dave is sitting on Maplehoof, and baby Grandpa has found a pair of pistols. John does not take them away from him, or even seem to notice he has them.

HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING: 7

BRIGHT: Earlier baby Bro broke one of the paradox slime cylinders and was sitting in it. John is pretty astoundingly bad at keeping babies away from obvious hazards.

TIER: That or the equipment is probably not sturdy enough to make it past an inspection into faulty management.

CHEL: But then he’s distracted by CG trolling him again, at least this time moving forward in time from the last conversation.

CG, like GA, apparently fails to grasp sarcasm...

EB: we had this great dare going. EB: to see who could be the least helpful and informative. EB: and you totally lost, dude! EB: you were hella helpful. CG: I WAS OBVIOUSLY JUST SPITING YOUR STUPID POINTLESS HUMAN DARE. [...] CG: ANYWAY, HOW COULD WE HAVE MADE A DARE IF I'M MOVING BACKWARDS ON YOUR TIMELINE.

… which is weird because moments later he uses it himself.

EB: do you even have elves? CG: YES, LET'S COMPARE WHICH FANTASY CREATURES THAT DON'T EXIST WE BOTH DO OR DON'T NOT HAVE. CG: WHAT A GREAT FUCKING IDEA, JOHN!

Hussie seems to waver back and forth a lot on whether trolls get sarcasm or not, in general. Since he’s contradicting himself with troll worldbuilding, that’s a point.

WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 19

Banter aside, he informs John that the babies are sent to Earth via meteors during the Reckoning.

BRIGHT: How do they survive the impact? Some of those meteor strikes destroy buildings. Those are some ridiculously resilient kids.

CHEL: Cut to AR, who is still having fun on the rocketboard, until he runs into a frog temple atop a meteor. This is apparently horrifying and illegal by his standards.

You are going to throw whoever is responsible into the slammer. You always call jail the slammer when you are extra angry at crimes.

Inside, he finds an empty time capsule, like Jade’s, some complicated machinery, and a monitor screen showing a greyscale house with a very familiar bespectacled female infant and dirty old hat in it. The year depicted, says the monitor, is 1910. Enter none other than Colonel Sassacre himself.

Eight days prior, the orphan girl was taken in by an aristocratic southern colonel and legendary humorist. He recovered the young lady from a crater where a bakery once stood, operated by the man's wife, a notable baked goods baroness.

An explosion outside leads them both to a crater, where once stood the doghouse of the colonel’s pet, Halley, but before the Colonel can investigate further he’s shot through the heart.

This is exactly why babies should not be allowed to dual-wield flintlock pistols.

BRIGHT: I remain baffled as to how Baby Grandpa can even lift those things, let alone pull the triggers.

CHEL: Baby Grandpa crawls from the crater, and Halley the dog turns out to be alive.

The young boy has difficulty pronouncing the name though. Sounds more like "Harley" when he says it.

How does he know it? The colonel died before he even noticed the baby was there. Is baby Nanna speaking well enough to tell him yet? I guess he could be told later, as Sassacre wasn’t in fact their only sapient guardian...

Thirteen years later, the boy develops a taste for adventure. He and his guardian bid farewell. His sister is sad. She will be left all alone with the wicked pastry baroness. She can handle it, he tells her. He believes in her.

It isn’t clear why she didn’t go with him, or leave under her own power. They don’t seem to be imprisoned, as the panel depicts them outside on grass with no restraints or guards over them, so it’s not a matter of only one of them being able to get out. That’s a point for Nanna not trying and a point for Grandpa not bringing her:

HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING: 9

That dog is also remarkably lively, considering it, unlike Bec, is an entirely normal dog, it was an adult thirteen years previously, and it’s somehow supporting the weight of an entire teenager on its back (again, please don’t try this at home, you can break the dog’s spine that way).

FAILURE ARTIST: As we’ve said, Colonel Sassacre is a thinly-veiled Mark Twain expy. The real Mark Twain died in 1910 at the same time Halley’s Comet was in the sky. It’s a cute historical gag having him be literally killed by a comet but it does muck up the timeline. Nanna must have been a senior citizen when Dad was born. Perhaps he’s adopted?

CHEL: The other option is that Dad is a senior citizen now, but surely John would have wondered why his dad is so ridiculously old. I think it’s just that thing in mainstream comics and cartoons where adults are split into Old and Not Old, and the parents are normal ages for parents but the grandparents would have to be in their hundreds going by the gags. See how Scrooge McDuck in the DuckTales reboot is over a hundred and forty years old yet his sister’s son is still a youngish adult.

AR notes that the appearifier is centred over Halley the dog, but hears someone coming. It proves to be the Draconian Dignitary. AR hides and watches, noting that DD is carrying Rose’s notebooks and Dave’s beta envelopes. DD keeps the MEOW book, but throws away the other items. Complacency of the Learned lands on the floor, and the envelopes land in the time capsule, which sets to bloom in four hundred and thirteen million years.

Meanwhile, John talks to CG while infant Mom Lalonde pets the mutant kitten. John asks if there’s any way to delay the Reckoning, but nope; CG warns him that the smallest meteors will start going in only a few minutes.

EB: ok, well you keep saying how doomed we are and how all this bad stuff happens sooner, but you never say why! EB: what happens in our game that's different from yours that makes things go so badly? CG: JACK NOIR.

The Jack Noir from the trolls’ game session allied with them and helped them dethrone and exile the Black Queen, while the one from the humans’ session, as you may recall, killed the Black Monarchs and gained their powers, and is currently rampaging through the Incipisphere. John asks if it’s the same Jack Noir, but CG explains.

CG: SO LET'S SAY YOU PLAY YOUR BANDICOOT AND I PLAY MY BANDICOOT. CG: THEY ARE ESSENTIALLY THE SAME BANDICOOT, SAME APPEARANCE AND DESIGN AND BEHAVIORS. CG: BUT THEY ARE STILL COMPLETELY SEPARATE BANDICOOTS ON SEPARATE SCREENS. CG: SO WE BOTH HAVE OUR OWN ASS BANDICOOTS TO OURSELVES, THE SAME BUT DIFFERENT. CG: OUR JACKS ARE THE SAME BUT DIFFERENT TOO. CG: SAME GUY, DIFFERENT CIRCUMSTANCES AND OUTCOMES. CG: OUR JACK TRUMPED THE QUEEN, BUT GOT NO FURTHER. CG: YOUR JACK GOT THE BEST OF BOTH OF THEM, AND IS NOW SOMETHING HIGHER THAN A QUEEN OR A KING… EB: like an ace? CG: SURE OK.

The trolls don’t know what went so differently to cause the two Jacks to behave so differently, but CG doesn’t think it matters by now. John interrupts him, deciding to do yet another Con Air ending re-enactment.

Watch on YouTube

Recap: montage of Con Air posters and images to the tune of “How Do I Live Without You”. John hands the thoroughly disgusting Con Air bunny to the protesting baby Rose, while CG watches huffily on his monitor. Jade demands a toy too, so John hands her the bunny he received from Rose in an excessively dramatic fashion. CG frustratedly hits himself in the head. In scribbly crayon-like drawings, Casey the salamander performs a drum solo with glowing blue mushrooms for drums and the Con Air plane crashes. More Con Air imagery, John embraces baby Jade and the baby Lalondes while sobbing; GC points and laughs at him over CG’s shoulder and they have a slapfight. John imagines himself in Nic Cage’s iconic wifebeater and mullet and performs an air guitar solo.

TIER: Lemme tell ya, as someone who's only experience with this darn movie is whatever pops up courtesy of John this sequence is just a trip and a half. Possibly a higher number.

CHEL: Cut to end-of-act curtains; they open on the next page, declaring a PSYCHE; there are more pages to go.

Cut to Dave’s hands, covered in the dead Dave’s blood. I… guess he’s supposed to be staring at them in shock? It’s impossible to tell through his shades. For all I know he could be worried about the cleanup. GC trolls him and they banter creepily, with her demanding to know what his blood smells like and him taunting her about her blindness.

TG: just him and me TG: havin a see party TG: like a couple of eagle eyed bros peepin shit up into the wee hours GC: D4V3 GC: C4N 1 COM3 TO YOUR S33 P4RTY? TG: i guess but youll have to be careful not to stumble around bumping into all the gorgeous masterpieces hanging around everywhere TG: god so beautiful to look at with my perfect eyesight GC: C4N 1 L1CK TH3 P41NT1NGS? TG: yeah thats fine

Neither of them seems to take it particularly hard. If there was narrative around the dialogue, I think we’d get a better grasp of how Dave feels. Lacking much body language or punctuation, tone is a bit tricky to get.

FAILURE ARTIST: There’s a character later who gets a lot of grief for insulting her blindness but reading what John, Dave, and CG say I don’t know how that character could be worse.

CHEL: AT, meanwhile, is trolling Jade, rather politely. He even takes time to ask if she’s having a good nap. She’s worried about John’s dreamself not waking, and AT scrolls into his view of the future timeline, but can’t find John awake, nor see into his dreams. Jade, however, will wake up soon, and she thanks him for this report. Unfortunately, when Jade wakes up she will be in danger, and AT can’t see any further. He tells her CG wants to talk to her about her exploding robot. He can’t see whether it exploded or not because there are a lot of explosions, but asking future Jade shows it did, and that she declared CG to be a pretty nice guy, which surprises AT since he doesn’t think CG is particularly nice. Jade says she thinks AT is nice too, and asks why he’s the only one who talks to her while she’s asleep.

AT: bECAUSE YOU HAVE A ROBOT, tO LET YOU SAY THINGS THAT HAPPEN, oN PROSPIT, AT: aND i'M CURIOUS, AT: bECAUSE THE ONLY TIME i EVER HAD FUN PLAYING THIS GAME WAS WHEN i WAS ASLEEP, AT: bUT NOW ALL OUR DREAM SELVES ARE DEAD, AT: }:'(

AT happily remembers his own time on Prospit, and we cut back to Rose, being trolled by GA despite the fact that Rose is obviously in the middle of an epic magic battle. The conversation is understandably chilly, and GA still hasn’t figured out that “Dumb Rose” as opposed to “Smart Rose” was John rather than a bizarre roleplaying scenario.

GC continues trolling Dave. He asks her how she operates a computer without sight.

GC: 1M SORRY D4V3 TH4T YOU W1LL N3V3R 3XP3R13NC3 TH3 S3NSORY BOUQU3T TH4T 1 3NJOY 3V3RY D4Y GC: TH4T 1 3NSCONC3 MYS3LF 1N L1K3 4 W4RM 4ND COMFY B4THROB3 M4D3 OF FL4VOR 4ND M3LODY TG: oh ok TG: so the dumbest and most far fetched explanation imaginable ok got it

Yes, pretty much. This brings me to a Problematykks point; GC is supposed to be blind, but it really doesn’t seem to affect her in any way at all. Its workaround is ridiculously convenient and effective, and while I’m not blind myself, I know many people with physical disabilities hate it when fiction does this. I know I would be pissed off if a piece of fiction showed an easy and convenient way to not have autism anymore. (Horrible, horrible memories of someone back in the days of Livejournal’s Fanficrants of a fic in which autism was somehow cured by having a foursome. I don’t remember how that was supposed to work.) “She’s a space alien” only goes so far in explaining it. Why even bother making her blind if it’s not going to affect her in any way?

CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 19

FAILURE ARTIST: She’s the least blind blind person in media. Characters like Daredevil from Marvel Comics and Toph from Avatar the Last Airbender have a Disability Superpower but at the end of the day they still can’t do things like read printed text. GC has no disadvantages.

BRIGHT: She can apparently smell and taste photons.

Which raises the question why none of the other trolls ever show a heightened sense of smell or taste. If GC can learn to interpret smells as colours, her sense of smell must have been that strong all along, and there’s no indication in the text that she’s biologically more sensitive than her companions. Trolls must be better at following a trail than bloodhounds.

CHEL: Synaesthesia which makes one strongly associate colours with smells is a thing, and synaesthesia is generally the word the fandom uses to explain Terezi’s ability, but you still have to actually see the colours for that to work. If she was only mostly blind and was picking up blurry colour patches, I could buy it (and that is how the fandom tends to do it with human AUs), but not if she’s supposed to be completely blind, and she still wouldn’t be able to read text that way.

BRIGHT: Time for another animation, and for a hop back into the recent past.

Watch on YouTube

As the meteor locked onto Dave’s house approaches, Dave climbs up the tower to retrieve his cruxite egg from the nest his sprite made. Unfortunately the sprite attacks him, knocking him and the egg off the tower. Bro Strider appears on top of the approaching meteor and slices it in half with his katana; the two halves are diverted by the blow and strike different areas of the city. Dave’s fall is broken by a rocket board, which is presumably how Bro got up to the meteor in the first place. (How did he manage to aim it to intercept Dave’s fall? Wouldn’t it take longer to get from the meteor to Dave than it takes for Dave to fall from the top of the tower to the roof of the building? We shall never know.) The egg hatches, and Dave is transported into the Medium. There’s no sign of what happens to Bro.

CHEL: Yet more cartoon physics around the Strider bros.

BRIGHT: I don’t know if we mentioned this earlier, but although Dave and Bro live in an apartment block that presumably housed multiple people, only Dave’s apartment gets transported into the Medium. Everyone else in the complex is left to die on Earth. SBURB is sociopathic.

Elsewhere in the Medium, back in the present, Grandpa’s ship is approaching Skaia, with Mom Lalonde and Dad Egbert on board.

Down on Skaia, Jack Noir draws his sword and slaughters the army WV raised to march on the Black King. WV cowers, but Jack leaves him alive. He then uses the Black Queen’s ring to send some sort of giant red tentacle attack through Skaia, slaughtering Dersite and Prospitian forces indiscriminately.

CHEL: Are they tentacles? I always thought of them as some sort of lightning lasers.

BRIGHT: That makes a lot more sense!

In the ectobiology lab, as the clock ticks down to the Reckoning, the babies are teleported to asteroids around the lab. There must be an air supply in this asteroid belt — characters are consistently shown as being able to survive outside.

CHEL: Maybe it’s just the players’ natural badassery. Batman Can Breathe In Space.

BRIGHT: On Skaia, CD makes his way through Jack’s slaughter fest, which has now ravaged a sizeable chunk of planet, and hands him the White King’s sceptre. Jack raises the sceptre and initiates the Reckoning. The meteorites start to vanish into Skaia’s defence portals. In the frog temple, DD somehow combines the MEOW genetic code with a paradox clone of Halley, creating Jade’s guardian Bec. Bec’s creation damages the laboratory equipment in the temple.

Cut to Jade, who is snoozing peacefully while her dream self explores Prospit. She looks up at Skaia, to see Jack’s shadow passing in front of it. Jack launches his tentacle attack on Prospit, slaughtering the inhabitants, then severs the chain attaching Prospit’s moon to the planet. The moon begins falling towards Skaia.

Jack then flies to LOHAC, where he encounters Bro Strider on one of the turntable mesas. Unexpectedly, Bro is able to give Jack an even fight. After a few exchanges, he drives his katana into the mesa; some sort of golden light emanates from the crack, and Bro absconds.

Wait, how did Bro get onto LOHAC? How did he survive the meteor impacts?

TIER: The ol' "rule of cool". As long as something is sufficiently "absolutely kickass!!" the rules of reality and physics can go sit on the bleachers twiddling their thumbs for all they fucking matter. There's a reason early fandom pinned down Bro as an unorthodox but immensely cool older brother type guy for so long. Because with what little information was available before we got bludgeoned with "No actually he was the absolute fucking worst thing to happen to Dave and fucked him up for life" that was the general impression he gave off.

CHEL: This and the meteor splitting are yet more reason not to take Bro’s treatment of Dave seriously; this is a world in which ludicrous animesque badassery rules the day, and physically impossible feats of battle occur every five minutes. Forcing a child to go through extensive and excessive sword training in brutal heat in a precarious place, possibly every day, ought by rights to be normal there, and I can’t believe he was physically hurt by swordfighting when he survived a meteor collision as an infant. Besides, training that extensive quite possibly could be the only thing that would keep Dave alive in these circumstances.

ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?: 18

BRIGHT: There’s a random Squiddles interlude, and then we return to Skaia.

John’s unconscious dream self has fallen out of Prospit’s moon as it plummets towards Skaia. Jade tries shaking him awake, and then slaps him, but to no avail. At the last moment, she throws him out of the path of the moon, and her dream self is then killed when it lands on her. Back on Earth, her dreambot overloads and explodes.

CHEL: Taking her tower room with it; Jade’s sleeping body plummets towards the earth.

BRIGHT: The moon leaves a gigantic crater in Skaia. John’s now-conscious dreamself hovers above it.

The babies vanish through the defence portals to Earth.

CHEL: Each takes an item with them. John takes the Sassacre book, Rose the first Con Air bunny, Dave rides Maplehoof, Jade takes the bunny Rose gave to John (which is in fact the Con Air bunny plus several years and repairs), Nanna sits inside Dad’s old hat, Mom takes the mutant kitten, Bro sleeps in the lap of Li’l Cal, and Grandpa dual wields the flintlock pistols he should not be allowed.

BRIGHT: Dave and Rose reach the Gates above their houses and set out to explore their Lands. We close on an eerie shot of Bec outside the frog temple on Jade’s island at night.

CHEL: Jade’s tower room is blown to bits, and a truly enormous meteor hovers over the scene.

Curtains close. End of Act 4. Before Act 5, we receive a message from Rose, via her GameFAQ.

[ZZZZ] Rose: Egress. This is my final entry. My co-players and I have made every earnest attempt, with occasional relapse, to play this game the right way.

Really? You haven’t been in the game for more than a couple of hours and Jade still isn’t in at all! Maybe consider that the fact that not all your players are in the game yet when you wonder why it isn’t working?

I have been meticulous in documenting the process to help our peers and successors through the trials should we fail. In my hubris I believed these classes were relegated to the Earth-bound, but in even this quaint supposition I was in error. Our otherworldly antagonists have assured us of our inevitable failure repeatedly, while the gods whisper corroboration in my sleep. I believe them now. I just blew up my first gate. I’m not sure why I did it, really. I am not playing by the rules anymore. I will fly around this candy-coated rock and comb the white sand until I find answers. No one can tell me our fate can’t be repaired. We’ve come too far. I jumped out of the way of a burning fucking tree, for God’s sake.

I can see her point. The game is horrible and should be stopped. On the other hand, I’d at least attempt to spend more than one day investigating it before trying to break it. Randomly destroying shit is more likely to make things much worse than anything else.

I have used a spell to rip this walkthrough from Earth’s decaying network, and sealed it in one of the servers floating in the Furthest Ring. The gods may disperse the signal throughout the cosmos as they wish. Perhaps it will be of use to past or future species who like us have been ensnared by Skaia’s malevolent tendrils. In case it wasn’t clear, magic is real. Pardon my egress. You’re on your own now.

This note is signed with a glowing multicoloured “RL” and revealed to be emitted from a purple box with an aerial, floating in space. It seems that’s how their internet’s still working.

FAILURE ARTIST: The internet seems to be a magical dimension in Homestuck and not something that’s part of physical infrastructure.

CHEL: Hours in the future, WV lands in the desert remains of Earth, wrapped up in John’s old ghost-patterned bedsheet, which is still white. A villein becomes a vagabond. In his memory, he tears up an effigy of Jack Noir… where’d he get it? Did the game create it for some reason? Anyway, John’s blanket falls on him from the sky as Prospit plummets; WV calls it a RAG OF SOULS. Adorably melodramatic.

John’s awoken dreamself gazes sadly at Jade’s deceased one, which for some reason isn’t actually under the rubble of Prospit and appears to still be three-dimensional. There’s no excessive blood splatter like with the dead Dave, which is good, not too over the top. He retrieves the Queen’s ring from her hand. Was he told at any point that it’s important? Because if he doesn’t know, I’m not sure robbing the dead is very heroic. He sees an image of himself flying over the battlefield in a large cloud above him; in the vision he’s near a castle, so he goes to seek it out.

On Earth, PM wraps herself up in an old Prospit banner. A mistress becomes a mendicant. In her memories, she has beheaded the Hegemonic Brute and is arranging a meeting with Jack Noir. He arrives and she presents the crowns; smirking evilly, he honours their bargain, and the Courtyard Droll brings her the green parcel. She brings it to the castle from John’s vision as he arrives there, hands over the box, and angrily walks away.

FAILURE ARTIST: She’s Honor Before Reason (maybe she’s programmed that way) but she has the right reaction. This is a lot to go through to deliver a package.

CHEL: Inside the box is a letter from Jade’s unknown pen pal, who writes in dark green and a distinctive jolly-hockey-sticks dialect, with a tendency to ramble off on tangents about movies and wrestling.

Anyway you should listen to jade from here on out john because she sure seems to know whats best for you. Whatever your adventure throws at you im sure shell tell you you can handle it. She believes in you.

And another letter from Jade.

even though its super late and you probably went through a lot of trouble to get it, i really hope this present cheers you up! you looked so sad while you were reading my letter. um... which is to say, the one you are reading now.

She explains that in her dreams she goes to Prospit and John’s sleeping dream self is there, and that’s where she gets her visions. She hopes he likes his present, and says her penpal is fun…

john i am REALLY looking forward to seeing you when you wake up!!!!! its been nice playing with my prospitian friends and all, but also kind of lonely knowing you were in the other tower sleeping and having lousy dreams. :( im not sure where i am when you are reading this but im sure ill make it down to where you are soon! (jeez how did you get down there??? oh well ill find out) i cant wait to fly around the moon with you and show you all my favorite places. itll be so much fun!!!!!!!!! :D <3 jade

Ow. I think this is the only time John cries in the entire comic.

A Single Tear(™) is a bit of an understated reaction to the death of one of your best friends who you just recently learned is also your twin sister, but to be fair, John isn’t left with very much time to react, as next panel Jack Noir’s sword is pointed at his face.

BRIGHT: John knows about dream selves and waking selves by now, I think?

CHEL: He knows they’re a thing but I don’t think he knows they count as backup lives. AT told Jade dream selves can die separately from regular selves but I don’t think anyone told John.

FAILURE ARTIST: Jack Noir wants the ring, but then he’s stopped by Jade’s gift: a robotic bunny wielding multiple weapons.

They line up for a fight.

Hours in the future, on a destroyed planet, AR wraps police tape around himself and becomes a Aimless Renegade. Before the disaster, he went to the Veil, where he found a sleeping John. He saves John by putting him on a rocket board.

Back to the robotic bunny. Jack Noir flies away from the fight. Grandpa’s battleship lands and Grandpa takes away Jade’s body. Mom and Dad disembark the ship and wave goodbye as it leaves. Grandpa cries a Single Tear as he transports Jade’s already taxidermed body. Did he have a machine?

CHEL: For that matter, why isn’t he helping anyone who’s actually still alive while he’s there?

HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING: 10

FAILURE ARTIST: Nope, transporting a dead body is more important.

Again going back, White Queen leaves Prospit. On landing, she becomes Windswept Questant and wanders the Earth. We go forward years later. She repairs the laboratory and meets up with AR, WV, and PM. WV’s homemade spear hides the ring.

John watches this scene through the clouds of Skaia. He looks at the ring in his hand. In another cloud, there’s Jade’s laboratory. We close in on it and inside is The Fourth Wall. It isn’t turned on, but we are still lead to Andrew Hussie, banging away on a computer keyboard as he recaps the plot for a second time.

CHEL: Which we shall do as well when we’re done with this section, because it’s insanely hard to keep track of everything.

FAILURE ARTIST: Andrew Hussie says Nanna’s comet landed 99 years before John’s “birth” so he has some clue about the age but still doesn’t see it odd that a woman that age has a son who is probably only in his thirties.

CHEL: As I said, it’s also possible Dad was really old too, but that’s never really suggested. Not to mention, since they were brought into existence as toddlers, shouldn’t the kids be noticeably older than the ages given for them? John should be biologically fourteen to fifteen by now and at that age that can make a visible difference. I know the art style doesn’t really give clues, but no one I’ve seen has ever pointed that out in fanfic either.

FAILURE ARTIST: Newborns aren’t distinctive looking and can’t really do the cute things toddlers do. People in TV and movies regularly give birth to six month old infants so it’s not strange.

CHEL: True, but this isn’t TV, it’s a comic, and they don’t have to use an actual infant as a prop here.

BRIGHT: Possibly it’s intentional. Among other things, we see the newly-created players survive short trips through vacuum, crash-land on Earth without even minor injuries, and handle weapons they shouldn’t be able to lift for another four or five years. This could work if players have superhuman abilities (that is, beyond the classpect system). If that was the intent then it really should be made more explicit, though.

Of course, what it really boils down to is that Homestuck runs off Rule of Cool and Rule of Funny, and occasionally breaks down on examination as a result.

On the whole this is a solid Act, I think! We have a lot of new stuff happening, more characters get introduced, and we find out some more about the trolls. It’s much less rambling than Act 1.

COUNTS ALL THE LUCK: 0 ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?: 18 CALL CPA PLEASE: 8 CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 19 GET ON WITH IT!: 18 GORE GALORE: 10 HOW NOT TO WRITE A WEBCOMIC: 15 HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING: 10 IN HATE WITH MY CREATION: 0 RELATIONSHIP GOALS?: 1 SEND THEM TO THE SLAMMER: 1 SOME OF MY BEST FRIENDS: 0 WHAT IS HAPPENING??: 9 WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 19 TOTAL: 127

[queerofcups]

I just started reading your phanfic through a recommendation, and I'm loving it so much! I had a question about shapes and weights to choose - Dan asks Phil how he got into doing porn, and his answer is about how he moved from traditional porn to the stuff that plays around with assignations, but I was wondering how he ended up doing any kind of porn in the first place? Is that something you considered including but decided to leave out? Would love to know!

Ooh a fic question! He just needed a job. I think the idea that one needs a "reason" to do sex work comes out of the stigmatization of sex work so I didn't, and am not really interested in, creating a big backstory for why. But that's not a super satisfying answer, so I'm going to (re?)post this little snippet of how he ended up at the studio and in the genre that made him famous. No cut because I'm on mobile, soz.

----

“Lindsey,” Sam says, knocking once on the door before pushing it open. The kid behind her smells like fear--not the gross, terrified kind that wafts off the ones they always send home, more like nerves and a little trepidation. It’s not ideal but it's not a scent that makes Sam queasy. 

Lindsey is in her office, leaning in close to a laptop, likely editing something. 

“What?” she asks, glancing up from the computer, “Also, will you tell me if this cut looks smooth?”

She spins the laptop around for Sam to see. Sam gestures for the kid to follow in behind them as they lean over to squint at the screen. Fuck’s sake, they’re getting old, can’t even get away with leaving their glasses in the break room anymore. The slightly blurry video comes into better focus and now Sam can see it's two omegas, one of them keening and pushing back against the other one, whose head is buried in between her legs. There’s a cut, a close up on the one giving head and then a cut back out, to the way the omega being eaten out is gripping her partner’s hair. 

“Yep,” Sam says, standing back up straight. “It’s a good one, Linds. And our 12 o’clock is here.”

Here and horny, now, Sam notices. They glance at the kid, a beanpole with big blue eyes and too much hair. The scent of fear they’d been giving off before isn’t as strong, now it's tinged with the salty-sweet smell of arousal, as if Lindsey needed more confirmation that her editing job would do the trick. 

“Sit,” Lindsey says and looks at him. “Phil, right?”

The kid nods. “I don’t want to go by that though.”

He’s Northern. Sam just barely stops themself from cooing over the way he says though. Lindsey flicks a glance at them, like she knows exactly what they’re thinking. 

“Slow down there, cutie,” she says, instead of mocking Sam for being a teddy bear pretending to be an emotionless tank. “We haven’t hired you yet. You know we don’t really film alphas. We don’t do that omega degradation shit. Not even a little.”

Cutie--Phil’s eyes go wide and he shakes his head. “No, no. I mean, yes. I know you guys don’t. Um. I know. I don’t want to film as an omega. I don’t want to degrade anyone. Ever.”

There’s a spike of fear, the real, queasy making kind, and Sam thinks about his application, the few films he’d put down for experience. Those films, made for alphas by alphas, came from studious notorious for the ways they treat all their talent, regardless of assignation.

Sam’s hands itch to reach out and smooth Phil’s dark hair away from his wide, wide blue eyes and promise him that they don’t do that here. They hadn’t even realized the kid was an alpha. There’s nothing about him that screams it. His nerves make everything he says soft and over-questioned and he kind of collapses in on himself, his concave torso leaning meekly into his knees. But he’s gorgeous, and still here and the dominated alpha genre seems like it’s churning out more and more videos every day. Sam could work with this.

“Hm,” Lindsey says, like she hasn’t already run through the same thought process Sam’s just done and is already scripting a shoot.. Just last week they’d been talking about needing a new draw, something that’ll keep them in competition. A sweet baby alpha that doesn’t want to degrade anyone even a little bit? 

Hell, Sam even wants to muss him up and they haven’t given an alpha a second look since they were a teenager.

“I can do anything,” he says, “If you don’t want me to film. I’ve done a little camera work and I’ve got a degree in post-production. My mum didn’t think I could get a job with either, which, hah, I guess she’s technically right but really. I want to do this. I really like your company and I really...you all seem different from other places. You treat omegas really well.”

Sam catches Lindsey’s eye, trying to communicate with her. They’re pretty certain if they let this kid ramble for too much longer, he’s going to tell them his whole life story and probably cry. Neither of them, Sam or Lindsey, is equipped to handle non-sexual tears. 

“Ok,” Lindsey says, sitting back and turning her computer around. She hits a button and the steady moaning starts up again. “Sam, get him the paperwork. Phil, we’ll be in touch about when you can shoot. We’ll start easy. Some solo stuff.”

Phil’s nodding and thanking Lindsey fervently, over and over again and Sam watches and thinks to themselves that they’re going to make their first million off this kid and the way he says thank you.

[mtvswatches]

Wynonna Earp 1x02 Keep the Home Fires Burning

Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)

Stray thoughts

1) Buffy and Veronica would be so proud of her punning abilities…

2) Well, this guy blew up his own cover rather stupidly…

3) Her quick-tempered nature is going to get her in trouble, isn’t it?

She did exactly the opposite of what Dolls asked her to do. But if this town is anything like Sunnydale – which considering how adamant they were about saying that Wynonna’s uncle died of a heart attack or something even though he’d been FUCKING BEHEADED – they will probably ascribe these shenanigans to a PCP gang, right?  

4) Is this like the Revenant Boss? The Master? Big Bad?

I’m sure I’ll find out soon enough.

5) I’m guessing there will be some sort of connection between this guy (I can’t remember if they mentioned his name already?) and Wynonna, given their conversation at the bar, the fact that he protected her and Waverly, and the fact that they’re both pariahs in their respective communities. Can we talk about the revenant community? Is that PC?

6) Yep, the revenants mentioned “the boss”.

7) “We know who you are and who you rode alongside of.” Is this because he crawled out of the well after Wynonna? Or did he hitch a ride with someone or something else we haven’t seen yet?

8) More backstory, thank you, show, I need it.

DOLLS: The Black Badge was a top-secret branch of the Marshalls founded in the 1900s by Roosevelt…

WYNONNA: Eleanor?

DOLLS: Teddy – to eradicate the paranormal forces suddenly blossoming on North American soil…

WYNONNA: Do you have a flamethrower? 'Cause a flamethrower is at least fun.

DOLLS: …working with your grandfather actually, Edwin Earp, to handle things up here.

WYNONNA: Hmm yeah. A one-year wonder. Family legend has it Eddie was only the heir for like 11 months, but came real close to sending all 77 of Wyatt's kills back to Hell.

So, if I got this right, when each heir turns 27, all the revenants killed by the prior heir come back to Earth, so that means they have to kill all of those plus the ones who hadn’t been killed by the previous heir, right? A ton of revenants, basically.

9) Yep. That’s Sunnydale.

10) This Boss Man doesn’t look like the one before…

So…

At least I now know that the cool revenant’s name is Hank. 

11) Okay…

BOSS: And the Earps?

HANK: It is just a matter of time before they figure out who I really am and what I did to their great-great-granddaddy.

A few things about their convo. Hank is clearly an outcast. He’s not respected among the revenants because of his connection to the Earps and because he’s not a revenant - he seems to be something else, and he won’t be accepted by the Earps if they learn what he did to their family. I always find this type of characters incredibly interesting, the ones who walk the grey moral line and who will typically do whatever is more beneficial for themselves in order to survive. It’s always interesting to see their inner struggles with morality and good/evil, and I wonder if Hank will be one of these characters. And who does he want revenge against?

12) This doesn’t feel random…

So, Waverly used to have an “imaginary friend” when she was a kid. Could this mean that her friend wasn’t really imaginary and she has some sort of psychic or supernatural powers?

13) I like Gus 100% more, bless you.

14) Now, this was totally unexpected but super cool!

So, Revenants can’t touch the gun without getting demon epilepsy or something. And I really, really like the way the show gets rid of the bodies – they literally burn down to hell.

15) This lady was totally flirting with Waverly, but what are her intentions?

In the words of Anya Jenkins…

16) I can’t disagree with him, though…

Raise your hand if you love him since Instant Star...

17) I hope she is right, in the long term…

WAVERLY: I got a good feeling about you. And I'm an excellent judge of character.

HANK: Sweetheart you really aren't.

18) She’s also a dork. I’m liking her more and more.

WYNONNA: Regular guns can slow the revheads down, but they will always come back for more until they meet Peacemaker, which only I can handle…

19) Bossman is not playing around…

BOSS: Malcolm kills her uncle, lures the heir back home, and now this? How many times do I got to tell you idiots? Peacemaker can't be touched by revenant hand.

LEVI: But-but we-we just thought…

BOSS: Don't! Ever! Think! I do the thinking for all of us.

20) So they want to hire a “professional” to create a distraction, but the problem is, the payment needs to be human blood… Is the shadowy guy from the beginning of the episode the “professional”? Will this show only ever give me more questions?

21) Hank looks so awkward wearing a hoody. And I’m gonna go ahead and say it. He kind of reminds me of Spike.

22) So, I think “shadow assassins” are like a special type of revenant? Levi mentions that they can only be activated by a blood sacrifice. I’m guessing this Killer Miller is the shadow guy we saw at the beginning of the episode.

23) Ooh, more scoop on Hank!

LEVI: You were Wyatt Earp's right hand; what would he say if he knew you were joining forces with every man he ever put down?

So, this revenant is disgusted by Hank helping… the revenants? Huh?

24) Okay, so the girls’ mom is not dead but just a deadbeat mom. I’m sure we’ll see her again. And I’m sure there was a reason for her leaving.

25) I didn’t really think he was going to do the blood sacrifice thing. And I didn’t believe he was human either? But I guess I was wrong…

And yeah, his reaction? Don’t tell me you don’t see the similarities…!

26) I kind of thought that the Shadow would end up going after all the revenants listed on Waverly’s notebook instead of going after Waverly… And btw, I guess she really wasn’t a good judge of character after all? Like, Hank didn’t even hesitate to throw that notebook into the hole in order to save himself, he didn’t care that he was going to send the shadow after the wrong target.

27) I knew it.

BOBO: Perfect time to make a hole - for our friend Waverly.

YOUNG WAVERLY: Will this really - make them happy?

BOBO:This will guarantee you all get what you deserve.

WAVERLY: Bobo. The name of my imaginary friend when I was growing up: Bobo! And I'm starting to think that he wasn't so imaginary.

Do you think Bobo could be Boss? Same initial letters… And I guess she didn’t have supernatural powers, after all, she was just tricked by a revenant.

28) I really love Waverly’s attitude. She doesn’t have any powers so far, but that doesn’t stop her from getting ready to fight back…

29) Well, that was easy… Cool. But disappointingly easy.

I mean, he was kind of scary, but in the end, he wasn’t really a threat? Unless he can’t be really killed off and he’ll come back every time someone does a blood sacrifice?

30) You really need to be a badass in order to be threatening while wearing plaid flannel PJ bottoms and furry sleepers…

Remind you of anyone?

31) “You’re just a girl” I mean, the references must be intentional, right?

32) That was cool, Waverly!

33) What is he doing, though? And what is he?

WAVERLY: Yeah, well, most of my stolen stuff was returned, OK? And he's just one of those crazy Wyatt fans. No, he's definitely one of the good guys.

WYNONNA: Everything in my body tells me he's one of the bad boys. My entire body.

34) Yep, Hank will do whatever he has to in order to survive…

At least for now, anyway.

35) Why is his back burning like embers?

36) And what exactly is their plan? What is “the dig”?

BOSS: I swear to you, our salvation lies not in thieving Peacemaker, or defeating the heir, - but in the dig! We stick to the plan! We stay on course. We let the Seven deal with the heir while the rest of us work, as we've been working for 15 years, towards one common goal: freedom! 

He got a little William Wallace there, didn’t he?

37) So, this is what Henry’s revenge is all about…

BOSS: I'm a man of my word, Henry. I can give her to you. The woman that changed you.

HANK: Well then, Bobo, we are officially in business.

And yes, Bobo was Boss. Manipulating a little girl? That’s really low, even for a revenant.

38) I’m getting very invested in this story, really. I have to thank you for suggesting I should watch this show! I really love the pacing in the episodes I’ve seen so far. It’s really hard not to comment on every scene because it seems all of them are relevant to the plot, there are no filler scenes, you know? And I really hope the episodes continue to be arc-driven instead of the “monster-of-the-week” type. I can’t wait to see the rest!

39) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

[chanceyrambling]

Power Rangers: Chromatic Frenzy

PART 1

INT. ART CLASSROOM – DAY

An art classroom.  Students arrive and prepare for class.

ALEX, a short tomboy-ish girl, and HECTOR, a timid teddy bear kind of guy, enter the room and take a seat.

The teacher, MR. TWIST, welcomes the class.

MR. TWIST

Okay, everyone, before doing any

sculpting, you need to identify

the structure of a figure.

HECTOR sits down with a worried look on his face

MR. TWIST (CONT’D)

So, today we’ll be doing some

figure drawings.

HECTOR

Like, nudey girls?

MR. TWIST

No, not “nudey” girls.

HECTOR

Okay, good.

ALEX and HECTOR begin their drawings

HECTOR

(to ALEX)

I hate these!  Drawing’s your thing,

not mine.

ALEX

Don’t worry. It’s not that hard.

You’ll do fine.

EXT. CITY PARK – DAY

A park.  Nice bright day. Joggers race by.  Children play.

CLICK

CHRIS, a slim hipster, captures these images through the camera hanging around his neck.

A man walks his dog.  An old woman sits on a bench.  Vince takes a picture.

CHRIS then focuses on a lovely couple holding hands as they stroll through the park.

Before he can take the picture, the couple is grabbed by two VOIDS, faceless gray creatures with a V on their chests.

CHRIS

(to himself)

Oh, great.  Voids! 

CHRIS notices that VOIDS are everywhere, attacking all at the park.  The VOIDS steal their colors.  The color drains out of each person, turning them gray, and they pass out onto the ground.

CHRIS runs in to help.  He attacks one of the VOIDS.

INT. ART CLASSROOM – DAY

ALEX draws the model.  MR. TWIST walks by, inspects it.

MR. TWIST

Wonderful, Alex.  You’ve really

captured the essence of each line.

Next he walks to HECTOR’S easel.  HECTOR has done a very crude drawing.

MR. TWIST (CONT’D)

Uh . . . well . . . yeah

HECTOR

Sorry.  I’m just not good at it!

Can’t we get to the sculpting,

instead?

Alex’s watch beeps.

ALEX

Hello? . . . Hey, Chris  . . .

I can’t understand you. Sounds

like you’re in a fight.

(laughs)

Oh, you are. We’ll be right there.

EXT. CITY PARK – DAY

CHRIS continues to fight the VOIDS.  More surround him, but he continues to take them down.

CHRIS

It’s like you guys aren’t even trying!

The VOIDS still attack.

One grabs CHRIS but before it can drain him of his color, ALEX appears and kicks it away.

ALEX

Need some help?

CHRIS

I think I had it handled!

ALEX

Of course you did.

They are joined by HECTOR, and the three fight with the VOIDS.

But there are too many.  The trio are now back-to-back, Voids circling around them.

HECTOR

Can we go ahead and morph now?

CHRIS

I don’t know why we didn’t start with that!

ALEX

Let’s do this.

Suddenly, the three pull out their MORPHING BRUSHES.

ALEX produces a RED SWATCH, HECTOR a YELLOW SWATCH, and CHRIS a BLUE SWATCH. They each place their coins in their MORPHING BRUSHES.

ALL THREE

Fusion Frenzy! HA!

The three swipe at the air with their MORPHING BRUSHES and produce large splashes of floating colors that then envelope them and transform them into their POWER RANGER forms.

ALEX morphs into the RED RANGER. The PAINT SWORD appears in her hand.

HECTOR morphs into the YELLOW RANGER. The SCULPT HAMMER appears in his hands.

CHRIS morphs into the BLUE RANGER. The FLASH GUN appears in his hand.

ALEX

Alright, guys; No prisoners.

The three RANGERS battle the VOIDS, easily destroying them.

ALEX

Piece of cake.

CHRIS

Ooh, I could go for some cake!

Red velvet, preferably—

Just then a piercing CAW shrieks through the air.  The RANGERS put their hands to their helmets, wincing, momentarily dazed.

HECTOR

My ears!

The MONO-CROW appears. (A cloaked bird-like figure resembling a plague doctor)

ALEX

What is that?!

CHRIS

It’s definitely no spring chicken!

MONO-CROW

I am the Mono-Crow!

Release your colors to me!

HECTOR

Stand back, guys! I’ll take care

of this turkey!

HECTOR rushes to the MONO-CROW, but is knocked to the ground by a swing of its powerful wing. 

HECTOR (CONT’D)

Well, that didn’t go so well.

HECTOR slumps to the ground, discouraged.

ALEX and CHRIS turn to each other.

ALEX

Come on, Chris!

As the two RANGERS run to attack, the MONO-CROW spins and spins, its wings creating a gust of wind.  ALEX and CHRIS push against the it, to no avail. 

CHRIS

I can’t!  It’s too strong!

The wind overpowers them, sending them flying backwards.

CHRIS

What do we do?!

[the-stories-in-my-head-95]

Hey, I’ve Got You- Chapter Five

Tony Stark x enhanced! Reader

Summary -The reader was captured and experimented on and given the healing factor and she has claws that extend out from the bed of their nails. The people who are experiment on her cover her skeleton in vibranium. So the reader now has metal claws. They keep her locked away for a very long time. They rarely feed her or let her out because there is such a high chance of her escape now. Somehow the UN panel that is in charge of the accords finds out about the illegal experiments and send Iron Man in to shut down the operation. The reader is the only one there because the scientists had gotten word that they had been discovered. Tony finds the reader and takes her back to the compound.

Message- The baby is here!!! Lots of time jumps! Sorry if it sucks!!

Warning- Reader is held captive and experimented on. Mentions of torture. Self-injurious behavior.

Background  Chapter One  Chapter Two  Chapter Three  Chapter Four

Word Count- 1,000ish

“What about Howard?” Peter asks.

“No way in hell.” Tony snarls. “What about Henry?”

“I’m pretty sure the first guy I went steady with was named Henry.” You say.

“Ok, definitely not Henry then. What about-.”

“His name is going to be Edward Anthony Stark and we’re going to call him Teddy.” You say glaring at everyone. “I’m giving birth to him. I choose the name.” You were days away from your due and had been becoming increasingly moody with each passing day. You looked around the room and everyone nodded. Tony even blushed a little at the idea of kind of naming your child after him.

“When did you decide on that name, my love?” Tony asks.

“Last night. Are you okay with it? I like how it sounds and I thought Teddy was a cute nick name.” you murmur.

“I love it.” Tony says as he leans in to kiss you.

******

You were exhausted and in pain, but you could already feel your body start to heal itself. It had taken 18 hours to finally get little Teddy out. You had decided to give birth at the compound because hospitals beds and most doctors still freaked you out, so you had chosen to use a midwife. You look over and look at Tony holding your son and a warm feeling spreads through your body. Then Teddy starts to whimper and cry out.

“Shh, Teddy, I’ve got you.” Tony whispered while rocking the baby a little. “I know you want your Momma but she had a really long day and I think we should let her sleep a little longer.”

“I’m awake.” You say as Tony passes Teddy to you. “He’s probably hungry.”

“Helen thinks that he’s going to be able to heal like you.” Tony says as you start to feed Teddy.

“How do you feel about that?” you ask

“I kind of like it. It’ll probably help with my anxiety knowing our baby can’t get hurt. I also like the idea of the two of you living forever.”

“No one lives forever.” You whisper

“Well there’s a first time for everything.”

“Then Teddy will be that first. Let’s stop talking about him living forever, he’s not even a day old yet.” You say as you look down at your son. “He’s perfect.”

“He is, you did so good today, I’m so proud of you, my love.” Tony says as he leans down to kiss your forehead.

“Mmm” you moan “Sorry about the sheets, and the mattress, my claws just kind of came out. I didn’t cut you did I?” you ask starting to panic.

“Just a small scratch.” Tony says showing you his hand.

“I’m so sorry, Tony! I-I didn’t mean-“

“I know, its fine, there’s nothing to forgive.” Tony says as he lays down next to you. The two of you lay in comfortable silence as Teddy feeds. When he’s done, you burp him and then he drifts off into a peaceful sleep.

*********

The last month had been amazing. Everyone in your little gang absolutely adored Teddy and why shouldn’t they, he’s an incredible baby. You were all wary of what was coming tomorrow, Team Cap was coming “home”. All of you were currently lounging in the living room. Tony was holding Teddy.

“I think we shouldn’t meet them outside.” You say quietly.

“What do you mean?” Rhodey asks.

“We should make them come to us, maybe in a conference room or by the pool. Put them a bit off balance. They kind of deserve it, don’t you think? After what they did to Tony.”

“I forgave Bucky a long time ago. He wasn’t in control when he was the soldier and everything he did after was to save himself and Steve. Can’t really blame him for that. Also Cap apologized, kinda.” Tony mumbles.

“He said he was sorry that you didn’t understand why he did what he did. That’s crap, not an apology.” Pepper says.

“They need to realize their actions have consequences. They need to see that what they did will have lasting effects. Cap and the others need to realize that it’s not going to go back to sunshine and rainbows. But I think your right about Bucky. He was a prisoner, like me. The only difference was I had you there to help me from the start and he had no one.” You say and everyone nods there head. So you come up with a plan. You are going to meet them outside with Peter and lead them into a conference room where everyone else will be waiting. You all agreed on presenting as a united front. Tony will not be left to fend for himself. When Rhodey says that Tony rolls his eyes and says he’s not as delicate as he looks. After a bit more planning you have everything ready.

“What about Teddy?” you ask quietly.

“I think that we should keep him from them, at first anyway.” Tony says.

“If you guys need a babysitter I can call my girlfriend to see if she can watch Teddy.” Peter says as Tony gets up to hand Teddy to Rhodey, who is in his wheelchair. Rhodey usually uses the robot leg things that Tony made him but sometimes if he’s having a bad day he’ll use the chair. You have a feeling that tomorrow is going to be one of those days.

“Ooh, Spidey has a girlfriend. Have you been holding out on us?” You gush. At that Peter blushes and starts to stammer out an answer. Her name is MJ and they just started dating a couple months ago. “Call her, tell her that if she wants to she can come up today and spend the night, as long as it’s okay with her parents. Also tell her she can’t tell anyone about Teddy. We’re not ready for the world to know about him yet.” You say. Peter nods and leaves the room to make the call. He comes back a little while later and says that she agreed. Tony sends a car to pick her up. “We should probably have her watch Teddy at the house. It might get a little crazy here and I don’t want him exposed to that yet.” Tony nods in agreement. Everyone spends the rest of the night enjoying the peace and quiet, knowing that tonight will probably be the last time the compound was like that for a while.

[visitationrpg]

Congratulations, BEL! You have been accepted for the role of Teddy Holt. You have 24 HOURS to send in your account, and don’t forget to look over the CHECKLIST!

Note from Admin Sidney: Your headcanons are really what sold me on this application, Bel! They highlight Teddy in such a way that I can practically see him standing before me in a Hawaiian shirt with a smile plastered on his face. He’s sweet and genuine, loved and damn-near worshipped, but you’ve given him such depth and I cannot wait to see him on the dash!

Welcome to Visitation!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME/ALIAS: Bel

PRONOUNS: She/Her

AGE: 19

TIMEZONE: PST

ANYTHING ELSE? Nope! :)

IN CHARACTER:

WANTED SKELETON: Teddy Holt

GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cis Male, He/him/his

BIOGRAPHY:

It was Teddy’s first game. He was in fifth grade, and he had scored the final touchdown. The small crowd cheered. His father ran down the bleachers and Teddy felt himself become engulfed in his father’s strong arms. He laughed as his father spun him around, set him back on the ground and ruffled his head. Teddy’s father knelt in front of him and put his hands on his shoulders. Teddy swore he saw tears in his dad’s eyes as he said: “You’re gonna do great things, Teddy! Just you wait!”

That wasn’t the first time Teddy had heard that he was special…and it sure wasn’t the last either. In fact, he heard it his entire athletic career. Whether it was on the field or off, Teddy was praised by teachers and peers, adults and kids alike for his skills, his looks, his personality, his power to see the dead—

Okay, so maybe he’s only heard that last one from his grandfather – his deadgrandfather, to be exact, who stood quietly at the end of the bed watching him one night.

“It’s only a nightmare. Nothing to worry about,” his parents comforted.

But it felt real.

“Maybe you ate an old slice of pizza,” his friends joked.

But it felt real.

“You’re probably stressed,” his school counselor said.

But it felt real…

Nonetheless, a nightmare is what he brushed it off as. Even when his grandfather visited him afterwards, Teddy told himself it was a recurring dream. Something that happened whenever he started to get too stressed with school and a social life. He chose to keep quiet about it from anyone else, wanting to avoid any kind of ridicule from his peers.

But he started to believe he was “gifted” after a terrifying meeting with Kyle, a young boy Teddy described with having a “blue face and black eyes.” While exploring an abandoned trailer park with his friends, the boy told Teddy he was a “rare one” and that he should relish his gift. Teddy denied it, but Kyle said they’d meet again sometime when Teddy least expected it and disappeared.

Teddy hasn’t slept soundly since then.

It sounds crazy, but hear him out! Or don’t. He doesn’t talk about it much anyway. Teddy works hard to look as if nothing’s wrong. At first, sleepless nights were difficult to conceal, but as he got older he found he could chalk it up to late night partying and studying.

Yeah…if only.

Teddy’s “gift” continued to haunt him throughout high school and to his dismay, now has followed him to Reed College, where he more than occasionally runs into unwanted spirits who love to interact with him. The stress from the constant popularity from both the spirit world and the real world has made him desperate to become invisible. Hidden from the limelight. To, dear god, be ignored for once.

But of course, not everybody gets what they wish for. So now, Teddy is forced to put on a fake smile for the rest of the world as he’s worried that if someone were to find out about this “gift” of his, he’d never be left alone.

And right now, that’s the last thing he could ever want.

ANYTHING ELSE?

-       Teddy’s a Cancer, born on July 7.

-       Regardless of what’s going on in his personal life, Teddy strives to be the sweetest guy he can be. His love of making people happy isn’t motivated just by his desire to keep his gift a secret. He genuinely likes seeing people in good spirit. Probably because he knows what it’s like to be tortured and doesn’t want anyone else to feel that way.

-       Teddy doesn’t drink or smoke. For one thing, he truly believes it’ll screw him up in the future. But he’s also terrified of telling people how he really feels, what he’s really going through. He can’t let his guard down. So, for now, NO DRUGS.

-       He likes Hawaiian shirts a lot. He has a dozen in his closet that he saves for what he calls “Hawaiian Shirt Saturdays.”

-       Teddy loves dancing. That doesn’t mean he’s a good dancer, but he enjoys it. He personally feels that disco is the best genre to dance to!

-       He takes strong sleeping medication just so he can get a decent amount of sleep every night.

-       Teddy has the biggest crush on Amna. He just thinks she’s so smart and nice and pretty and he’ll go in the most haunted of houses if it makes her happy. (I just really love the idea of Teddy being a hopeless romantic.)

-       While most of his time is spent working on Visitation and marketing homework, Teddy still loves to play football. He often plays in his spare time or to blow off steam.

QUESTIONNAIRE:

DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE PARANORMAL?

Teddy’s eyes flick to the floor. He stares at his shoes, shuffles his folded hands closer to his body. His instinct is to answer, ‘Yes! Yes, I’ve seen them right in front of me!’

But he doesn’t.

“I…I guess, so?” he laughs nervously. “I mean, I’ve heard a few ghost stories, and to be honest, I’ll never say Bloody Mary’s name near a mirror. Ooh, that’d be a good idea for an episode. Someone should write that down.” He smiles and runs a hand through his hair.

“But yeah. I don’t see why I wouldn’t believe in the paranormal.”

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A PARANORMAL ENCOUNTER?

Teddy’s smile fades faintly as Kyle flickers in his memory.

“I’ve heard like, doors close without seeing anyone there,” He shrugs. “And I’ve had a recurring dream about my grandfather which is admittedly a little spooky, but nothing noteworthy.”

Kyle’s words play again in his brain. “We’ll meet again.”

“Yeah…” Teddy says with a half-smile. “Nothing noteworthy.”

IF YES, DID SAID ENCOUNTER CHANGE YOUR VIEWS ON THE PARANORMAL?

IF NO, WHY NOT?

Teddy thinks for a moment. Has he really thought that ghosts existed his entire life? There wasn’t anything that convinced him otherwise (apart from the multitudes of ghosts he’s seen around Reed).

“There isn’t anything to prove they don’t exist. We shouldn’t say that just because we haven’t seen something that it can’t be real. I’ve never seen a blue whale, but that doesn’t mean they’re not real, you know?”

Something moves in the corner of his eye. Teddy wants to look, but hesitates.

“I just think that people should be more open minded,” he continues. He notices a shape move behind the cameraperson. It seems to be mocking him. Teddy’s eyes flick back and forth from the camera and the spectre.

“I hope the type of viewers we attract to the channel can be open minded about things they might not understand,” Teddy nervously finishes, his eyes now stuck on the apparition. “I think the world will be a better place if we do that.”

EXTRAS:

HERE’S A PINTEREST BOARD! :D

AND HERE’S A PLAYLIST!! :D

[rynhaswritersblock]

giant teddy bears (hc) | p.p.

summary: first dates are awkward, peter sucks at dance dance revolution, and the night ends with a giant teddy bear and something sweet.

warnings: IM SORRY I THINK THIS ONE IS A BIT LESS CHAOTIC THAN THE OTHERS IM SORRY I KNOW THAT'S LIKE MY BRAND LOL BUT I JUST AAAAAAAAAAA

+ + +

- are you ready?

- i'm listening...

- no that was weak come on guys!

- i said ARE YOU READY?!

...

- i think we can do better than that

- i said ARE YOU READY?!!!!!

- YEAHYEAH!!!!!!

- i'm so sorry i just watched a gif of sebastian stan doing that thing where he gets super hype and then just starts laughing but i really harvested that hype energy

- pro tip: go back and read that first bit in seb's voice you Will Not Regret It

- after writing one normal imagine, i am back to writing another hc

- the next one will be normal though LOL

- guess what

- chicken butt

- jk IT'S TIME FOR THE ARCADE WITH Y/N AND PETER!!!!!

- HELLS YEAH

- y'all r never gonna guess what i'm doing

- i am listening to one direction WOW

- heart attack is an underrated song 😔

- you guys said the emojis in italics made you lose ur mind so

- they're staying

- fuck it slant 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

- fun fact i got pretty far into writing this and then was like "Hmm... no yeah This Ain't It" and so we're back and we're switching up the prompt a little bit

- so YAY

- so peter's balls finally dropped or something idk and he got his bitch ass together and asked you out!!!!!!!

-  yay peter!!

- he was super nervy while doing it y'all were just walking home from school as per usual and this is how it went down

- y'all were passing the local arcade

"y/n- did you, uh, did you wanna go to the arcade tonight?"

"ooh yes, that sounds like so much fun"

"awesome... it's a date"

- and even though peter muttered that last part

- YOU HEARD IT

- who has super hearing NOW bitch

"a date?"

- you look over at peter and quirk a brow

- but on the inside ur like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- YEAHYEAHNASDBFKSDNGLSFNKDC

- penis man gets flustered as FUCK

"oH-! well uhhhhhhh only if you, uhhh only if you want it to be"

"looks like i'll be dressing slightly better than normal"

- at this point y'all are at ur apartment building so you quickly peck him on his cheek (we're confident today ladies and gays!) and run up the steps, waving as you shut the door

- peter's in Fucking Shock.

- eyes wide, cheeks Red As Hell, standing there like Nobody Move! 0_0

- it takes some weirdo person idk to bump into him as he walks by to get him out of his trance

- (he jumps and turns to look at them, throwing his arms in the air like ?? before just sighing)

- (then he remembers Holy Shit I HAVE A DATE WITH Y/N AAAAAAAAAAAA and sort of like Skips away like how he does in far from home after the kiss you get the deal)

- u make sure to put on ur Cutest Fit

some inspo <3

- IM KIDDING

- jk the Ball Pit Dress Blanket Thing is a look and a half 😼

- in case u were wondering (no one is) this is what i would wear:

- when reading fics i Always have to have what im wearing in mind otherwise i am very bothered idk why

- anyways thank u pinterest for the style inspo

- shameless self promo my pinterest is in my bio and we can send each other memes on there <3

- ofc u can choose ur own outfit 😌😌😌😌😌😌😌😌😌

- Not Me putting on jeans and feeling Fancy 😂🤏👋

- N E Ways! u put on ur dope fit and get all nice smelling n shit

- hair all pwetty

- cue (queue? i hate this word) that scene in homecoming of peter getting ready for the dance

- except he doesn't wear a suit (DEFINITELY WONDERS IF HE SHOULD THOUGH) and instead opts for this fit:

- Mhmm..... yea.... Yup.

- look at the SHOES

- anyways i think peter would wear that One Fit from the beginning of hoco with the blue sweater over the button up or maybe something a bit nicer idk

- the look i put is superior 😔

- he's finally ready and smells gr8 and hair is done just how he knows u like it

- may is fucking spitballing tips like a madwoman

"give her all your attention, peter"

"let her win most of the games, but don't make it look like you're letting her win"

"oh and god peter BUY HER A GIANT TEDDY BEAR"

- peter's like Yup Yup Got It May on the outside but on the inside he's fucking taking notes like the nerd he is

- bae

- just as you finish ur final touches ur phone buzzes

whale penis On my way :)

- fyi a whale's penis is called a dork 😌 the more u know 😀😀😀😀

- you quickly text him back and before you know it this Puta is in front of ur door and his heart is going ZOOOOOOOOOM

- but since the two of you are so close and in sync he can usually hone in on your heartbeat even from a far ish distance so he focuses and finds your heartbeat easily

- ur heart is racing too and it makes him feel better

- he finally gets the balls to knock on ur door and Does Just That

- you open it SO FAST (you were secretly standing just outside the door waiting for peter but he doesn't have to know that)

"hi, peter"

- the look on peter's face

- he in Awe

- u look so pretty!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa

- this is a lovepage for that little 'a' at the end of that scream. idk why it makes me smile. it's like the underdog

- i need to fucking Restart my Brain jesus christ

- i get attached to little things so easily MOVING ON

- Beter finally regains himself

- shit excuse me

- 🅱eter finally regains himself

- there we go

"you look.... wow"

- ur face gets SO HOT

"thought i'd go for something other than leggings and oversized t-shirts"

- aka my whole wardrobe

- Very Basic White Girl of me

- (assuming the Fit ur wearing is the picture i put) (if not you can just ignore this little bit) ur like cleavage or whatever is out and it is Definitely Not What Peter's Used To Seeing!

- the Collarbones

- Sexy

- u catch peter's eyes linger on ur chest for a second and u 0_0 for a second

- but then it's like YAY FOR ATTRACTIVE FEATURES

- THANKS PUBERTY????????????

"you look wow as well"

"oH well i dress like this pretty normally i think it's really not that big of a change i probably should've dressed better-"

"you always look good, peter"

- Faking Confidence! hoping peter can't hear ur heart banging against ur sternum!

- but he can... Little Shit

- VERY RED FACES FOR THE TWO OF YOU

- VERY FLUSTERED

- peter is such a gentleman

- waits for you to lock ur door before holding out a hand nervously

- you take it ofc and he intertwines ur fingers and sort of Rubs His Thumb AGainst Ur Skin???? when i put it like that it sounds weird

- i appreciate writing headcanons because i don't have to think things out so that they sound pretty i can just Braindump and y'all r like Yea!! 😀❤

- a very nice feeling <3

- the two of you walk down the sidewalk together

- eventually the awkwardness of Woah We're On A Date!? is gone

- peter starts swinging your hands and you can't stop smiling

- a few people look at the two teenagers just giddily and dramatically swinging their arms together and laughing as they walk down the street

- but those people find it very cute

- y'all talk about the weirdest shit too

- peter rambles about his theory of there being a multiverse

"i mean, what if there really is a multiverse? like, i refuse to believe that we're the only living beings in this whole universe, much less believe that this is the only universe. and, when you think about it, it's like a whole new set of doors of knowledge are suddenly there for us to explore, i mean it just completely changes how we understand the initial singularity. we're talking about an internal inflation system and then how would that even work with all the quantum-? it's insane-!"

- he looks over at you and you're just smiling

"sorry"

"don't apologize for being a genius, peter"

- the ffh reference 😼

- his insides are like lkdsfhskjdfbg at that

- you also have ur nerd moment (i'm making this about reading because.... I Think We Can All Agree)

"what i don't get is all the imbeciles at school who think reading is stupid. they're all like, 'i haven't read a book in like two years! ha ha!' and i'm like 'oh! no wonder you're so stupid!' because not only do they think it's quirky for whatever reason to not read, but reading genuinely makes you smarter and they're all missing out on it! moreover, the feeling of getting sucked into a book and going on the story with the characters and feeling everything they're feeling and when you finish the book it's like holy shit i can't even process this and- oh i'm rambling"

- peter's just looking at you in awe

"this is why i like you"

- NOBODY MOVE

- you Cannot Breathe for a second and the two of you stop walking (still holding hands doe)

"you..?"

"i did ask you on a date, didn't i?"

- you scoff

"you muttered that it was a date and the only reason that fact was established was because i heard it and acted on it"

- peter sighs exasperatedly, still grinning like the Fool He Is as he lets go of your hand to swing his arms dramatically

"well, sorry i'm not super smooth and suave all the time!"

"yeah, cause you're never smooth and suave"

- now he :o

"hey-!"

"that's why i like you, too, parker"

- SMILE GETS EVEN BIGGER

- BIG CHEESY MOMENT

- the two of you clasp hands again and you hug his arm as you continue walking

- i wanna hug a boy's arm

- you get to the arcade and he opens the door for you

"m'lady"

- he's such a dork i hate (love) him

- now here u guys....

- guess who's like genuinely never been to an arcade...

..........

- 🙋‍♀️

- it me!

- yes yes we know i have no life

- SO BASICALLY

- i'm just gonna like fucking Spit-Ball the adventures of y/n and peter at the arcade

- if ur confused rn i am too

- OKAY

- SO U WALK IN

- imma walk up to him and imma push him and imma say I HAVE AIDS no wait thats so strong hold back, savor it, BUILD to that

- i know i didn't get all the words right whatever

- at first it's like Sensory Overload! but then 🅱eter drags you over to the front desk and y'all get ur tickets

- and then it's STRAIGHT TO THE PACMAN BOOTH

- he looks so FUCKIGN CUTE cause his tongue is like sticking out as he focuses

- y'all try the claw machine SO MANY TIMES

- not you managing to actually make it work and getting a spider-man toy

- nOT YOU GIVING IT TO PETER AND HIS CHEEKS ARE JUST 🔴

- the slant on that emoji i'm fucking losing my mind

- you absolutely crush him at the basketball game thing

- and y'all play that thing that has the weird seats or whatever and you're racing

- he lets you win

- y'all KILL IT at dance dance revolution

- peter trips over his feet and you laugh So Loud the people around you are like o_0

- uhhhhh what the fuck else is at an arcade

- i just KNOW i'm gonna forget something and y'all will be like BUT WHAT ABOUT THE _____

- my apologies in advance

- at the end of the night y'all get pizza from the little restaurant they have (idk if that's an actual thing arcades do but fuck it now they do)

- and peter wins you a giant bear and you smile SO BIG!

- peter can't stop smiling at u and u both r so so happy

- guys i need to get a graphic design is my passion in here.....

- getting a bit worried cause idk where to put one 0_0

- not sure where to go with this now... may just read some fics to get inspiration and completely forget to come back to this <3

- i promise i won't i wanna get this up tonight AAAAAAAAAAAA

- okay i will be back after i get inspo

- update it's been an hour and i got distracted have yet to find inspo i'll be back

- update part 2 i went downstairs to get a snack to Fuel My Brain and ant-man and the wasp was on so... watched that

- FUCK INSPO I CAN DO THIS MYSELF

- but i have the brain of a strapless croc.... whatever

-OKAY

- SO YOU GOT YOUR BEAR RIGHT

- YAY

- then you can peter are like "we should probably go" cause it's getting late and it's new york and yes peter's spider-man but y'all are on a date! and we don't want to get attacked!

- huzzah!

- so you leave

- holding hands

- (screaming inside)

- ur other hand is just holding the large ass bear to your chest and peter cannot stop SMILING

- the chaos level has gone down i'm sorry i'm tired

- here's some normalcy!

- you start walking home and see delmar's and peter's like "MR DELMAR WILL GIVE US FREE SOFT SERVES :D" so. you go to delmar's

- you walk in still holding hands and the Second mr delmar sees you he (¬‿¬)

"what brings you two kiddos in so late?"

- peter's BLUSHING

"we, uh, we went on a date SO YOU HAVE SOFT SERVES RIGHT?"

- he's so fucking flustered and it's adorable

-  mr delmar just laughs

"on the house just for the lovers"

- now who's blushing

- your name

:o

- "your name" i was feeling spicy huh

- I HAVE TO PACK FOR MY TRIP TOMORROW

- HAHA OOPS

- mr delmar hands you the ice creams and y'all thank you

- he winks you sly bastard

- the two of you walk out and sit on the bench outside to eat your ice cream

- hands are feeling lonely cause you needed to hold your ice cream 😔

- at first y'all are just silent and then you look over at him just happily licking his ice cream

- he's got chocolate ice cream next to his mouth and you laugh

- he turns to you

"what?"

"messy eater"

- you mumble as you raise a hand and wipe it off with your thumb

- you wipe your thumb on your napkin and look back up at peter and suddenly the air has changed cause he's just staring at you or your lips really and oh wow now the air has left your lungs and your heart is racing

"can i kiss you?"

...

- peter tastes like chocolate.

HERE'S A MEME TO MAKE UP FOR THE LACK OF GRAPHIC DESIGN IS MY PASSION

- what if we kissed on the jouch? 😳

- hi lizthearies shoutout to our pinterest convos

- alright story = over

+ + +

THIS TOOK ME SO LONG TO WRITE AND FOR WHAT

ily all, treat yourself and others with kindness (dream with harry had me crying within the first five minutes i love him so much), and WEAR A MASK (unless you're in a safe place aka not the US lol)

AND DONT FORGET TO CONTINUE SIGNING PETITIONS AND SPEAKING OUT!! BLM IS NOT A TREND!

<3

[vidderinserts]

Hey, so I absolutely adored what you wrote for my last request. Can I request more of Jackaboy with a pregnant reader, please? Maybe they've been trying for a while and the test is finally positive and Jack just can't wait to announce it to the world? Thanks in advance!

It was time. The minutes had passed, you kept your eyes clenched tight. Sean was pacing outside the bathroom door. The last three tests - in about as many months - had been negative and you weren’t sure your little heart could take it again.

“We can always go to a doctor to help us?” jack called through the door, his ceaseless fidgeting quieting for the moment. “If it’s negative, I mean. See if maybe it’s something wrong with one of us?”

Your heart broke a little at the anxiety in your beloved’s voice, knowing he was just as desperate for the little plus sign as you. If not more.

Playing Dream Daddy did seem to have increased his desire for a child.

“Darlin’?”

You took a deep breath, neglecting to answer in favor of slowly turning the pregnancy test to look.

“Oh my god.”

Your voice cracked and you let out a tiny sob. Assuming the worse, Sean flung the door open. Tears were already threatening his ocean blues, and he wrapped his arms around you. “Oh sweetheart… I’m sorry. Tomorrow we can schedule-”

“Sean, look!”

•

Four months passed and the Septic fandom had noticed you were reluctant to come on camera. Had you been harassed or something? Were you and Jack having problems and you didn’t want to be involved with them anymore?

Many were worried, sending you messages on social media, drawing cute pictures of you in attempts to cheer you up.

“They’re so sweet,” you commented one night, curled up in one of Sean’s hoodies. He was editing a RYC, and you were munching on your favorite snack. A mug of peppermint tea was on standby, as was coffee for your fiancé. “Someone drew me and Sam.”

“Aww, look how cute!” He grinned at you, kissing your cheek. “Just like you.”

“Have you told Mark or the others?” You asked after a moment of comfortable silence. You’d been prompted by a Dark and Anti fanart, which had ended up in your tumblr tag. Probably because you jokingly said you preferred Dark.

“Felix knows, and I’ve been hinting it to to Mark and Ethan but I dunno if they just haven’t figured it out or if they think it’s me saying I want a kid.”

“Bet you a coffee Ethan gets it first.”

“Only if you get decaf.”

•

They were getting really concerned now. You were mentioning feeling sick and tired in tweets and Jack was saying you just didn’t have the energy to sit and play a game with him right now.

Were you seriously ill?

Jack would’ve told them, right?

Was it leading to an Anti reveal?

You laughed at that theory, reblogging it with no tags just to watch people set things on fire. “They think Anti’s gonna kill me.”

“Maybe they think Anti’s gonna take you over?” He suggested, setting a bright purple mug in front of you. A fan had given it to you after your engagement to Sean had been announced. On it was a large Sam Septiceye, and the words Mrs. Septiceye in radioactive green cursive.

It was one of your favorites.

“Ooh I like that idea, let’s do something with it.” He laughed at you, nudging the ginger tea towards you. The morning sickness had mostly subsided - it hadn’t been super horrible but neither of you were fond of vomit- but the ginger helped a lot.

“Maybe after our wee bab finally joins us?” He suggested, turning back to the tv. “We should tell them though, you are over halfway along.”

You sipped from your mug with a grin. “How should we do that, Mr. Eye?” Sean sat back, an arm around your shoulders.

“A video probably. Let them know you aren’t dying or somethin’. We can Vlog going to buy baby furniture and not tell them it’s for us until the end.”

•

“How’s my favorite preggo?”

“You can’t just call her that, Ethan. That’s rude.”

“It’s okay Mark-”

“You gotta ask how miss preggo is!”> Ethan and Mark dissolved into giggles on the screen, and you sighed. Sean was giggling too, trying to hide it in his coffee mug. Amy looked sympathetic, flicking Mark’s ear.

“For real though, you’re doing okay right?”

At that, the boys settled and sat eagerly. You smiled at them all, nodding. “Yeah. Doc says we’re both healthy as can be, and my delivery shouldn’t have any complications.” Ethan looked relieved suddenly, and it dawned on you.

The boys had been nervous for you, but hadn’t wanted to stress you out.

“We just filmed a trip to the furniture store too,” Sean cut in. “To announce the baby ya know?”

“At last!” Mark giggled. “Jack’s been so patient but all I’ve heard is how excited he is to tell everyone.”

A look of betrayal took over your fiancé’s face and he leaned close to the camera so the others could only see his bright eyes. “Traitor.”

•

The video went up not too long after that. Your stomach was kept out of frame for the most part, but was hidden under an oversized sweater when it was shown.

“So what color is the nursery?”

“I think the light grey and purple they showed us?” You answered, referring to the people you’d gone too for paint samples. “So maybe a purple bedset for the bassinet?”

“It’ll go with the big ass teddy bear Felix bought.”

“I found the cutest pajama thing!”

“Sean that’s… okay, yeah that’s pretty cute.”

“We’re getting it.”

It wasn’t until you guys were back at home, and you led Sean into the spare-room-turned-nursery that the pieces finally came together.

You guys weren’t shopping for someone else’s baby, but your own.

“Surprise!” You both shouted, standing beside a large sign with your due date plastered in green and purple letters.

I love doing the pregnant fiancée thing! For @foxinaforestofstars 💚

[smilecake]

Comfort | Pt. 2

A/N: I am alive! I have been writing on this one for too long, but I finally managed to complete this chapter! If a lot of you guys like this chapter, I can update another one, but it depends if you want another one :) Anyways, thank you for reading! x  

Genre: Fluff, fuckboy!au, romance 

Pairing: Jungkook x OC

Word count: 10 K 

Summary: In which you (Somin) like Jungkook and try to get with him, despite his fuckboy attitude. 

Previous: Comfort Pt. 1

“Honey, we are going on a vacation starting this week. Nobody will be home when you return for the weekends.”

Somin sighed to herself as she leant against the washing machine. She was clenching the laundry bin in her hands and it amazed her how it was her first time to do the laundry at her dorms in the weekends. Normally, she would have been at home sipping warm chocolate milk and talking about her hectic week of studying and presentations with her mom. However, her parents decided to take a vacation in Cuba for a week and this left Somin with no choice but to stay at her dorms with minimal social contact as most of her roommates returned home spending their time with their family, including her neighbor she hasn’t spoken to for days or weeks ever since that incident.

She didn’t know how to act around him anymore. It felt exciting and embarrassing at the same time whenever she saw him. Shyness was her biggest problem and it forced her to avoid him for quite some time.

“...We had a presentation....Yeah...” Someone murmured.

Somin snapped her head up when she heard voices coming down the stairs. She dropped her laundry bin and looked down at herself touching the fabric of her clothes.  She didn’t expect anyone to be here, so she didn’t put any effort to look presentable. Her third-day hair was collected in a messy bun and she was still in her pink footed teddy bear onesie. It would be extremely embarrassing for her to have people see her like that. Panicked, she bit her lip and pushed up her glasses.

“Oh god, what to do?” She said to herself, as she frantically looked around to hide herself. Her laundry still had 30 minutes to go and most people just put in their laundry and leave. If she could hide herself for a few minutes, it would solve the problem, so she thought. She quickly moved herself behind a laundry machine when she saw a red laundry bin appearing behind the wall.

“Yeah, I had mine in the morning. I have to say, they didn’t go easy on me with their questions. I felt like I’ve aged 20 years from the stress they gave me.” The girl complained, when she entered the laundromat room and put down her bin on top of the machine. The other person who came along laughed at her and leant on the same spot Somin was at earlier. He was dazzling as always and it surprised Somin that they were both at the dorms, despite the weekends. Were they always here, Somin thought to herself.

Somin recognized the girl as that friendly girl living in the room at the end of the hallway. She would occasionally pass her room and each time when she did, she would hear Ed Sheeran’s music booming out from her speakers from outside her room. Further than that, she didn’t really know much about her, except that she seemed to be close to him now.

A small feeling started in the pit of her stomach and even if Somin was a very honest girl, she couldn’t stop herself from eavesdropping on them. It was her curiosity that made her break her own values, and it seemed like it didn’t stop there. Somin didn’t like how that girl was so close with him. She didn’t like how she was with him at the moment, even though she didn’t do anything to Somin. She just didn’t like her presence. She suspected it might have something to do with that jealousy she read so much about in online fanfiction, or heard her friend complaining about whenever she had a boyfriend.

“Are you talking about Ms. Davis? I heard she is going through a mid-life crisis due to her divorce with her husband and she is taking her anger out on us.” Jungkook flashed his bunny teeth, as he ran a hand through his black bangs. Somin widened her eyes and heat rushed to her cheeks upon staring at him. Even the way how he breathes could make Somin have difficulty breathing. He seemed to be extra handsome today, even if he was just dressed in a plain white T-shirt and black skinny jeans, paired with Timberlands. It was as if she was star struck from the moment he stepped into the room. He would always look handsome to her in any way.

“Oh, speaking of Ms. Davis. I heard her son is going to throw a party this upcoming Tuesday. Are you going?”

Jungkook bit back a smile, as he cocked his head. Something in the way he was looking at her made him seem determined and up for a challenge. “You don’t even have to ask. Are you going to be there?” Jungkook smirked, as his eyes shortly took in her appearance. Somin knew what he was doing. She saw him do it often around the campus whenever he wanted to have fun. He would subtly check her out and ask her whether she would go to a party, and if she does, Somin would have to sleep with earplugs for the rest of the evening. A shiver ran down her spine when she was reminded of those events, and it made her heart clench. She realized that, despite the kiss, Jungkook would never look at her the way he just did. He would never ask her out for just how she is. She had nothing to offer compared to that girl and on top of that, what’s so special about one kiss? He was a fuckboy after all. It was like common manners for him to kiss random girls, especially when he did not want to have a crying mess as his neighbor interrupting his sleep. It was stupid of her to think that maybe there was something more between them. Something called love, which she did not have any experience in.

“Of course, especially if there will be more cute guys like you attending.” She winked at him, which made Jungkook smirk and raise an eyebrow. Somin could tell he was amused by the way he leant in and supported his upper body with his elbow on the washing machine. “You want to have a little taste of how the party is going to be then?”

Somin bit her lip, as she fidgeted with the sleeve of her onesie. It was really uncomfortable and difficult for her to watch them, especially if they were going to make out. All what she wanted was for them to leave, so she could finish her laundry and return to her room, wishing that none of this was real and Jungkook did not make her feel ill about her own feelings. She did not like this one bit and it messed with her mind, sending obscure thoughts that could lead to mental breakdown if she was not going to escape from this place soon. At first, she did not notice her sharp intake of breath caused by her feelings, but when allergy took shape as the worst condition in the world, she grew sensitive to the dusty environment and exposed herself unwillingly from a simply itch to her nose. Stupid allergy, Somin cursed mentally, but she immediately stood frozen when the room had gone awfully silent and she had become the center of their attention. Both heads were snapped towards her direction with surprise as their gazes prick into her back and made her feel unbelievable small and shameful for eavesdropping on their intimate moment.

“Oh... Hey, I didn’t see you there. You are Somin right, from room...” The girl’s voice trailed off when she couldn’t come up with the number. She sounded friendly, but something in her eyes displayed passive aggression, whereas Jungkook still looked amused and laid-back.

“She’s my neighbor,” Jungkook added, before he stepped back and put distance between the girl and him as if he had heard his cue. Somin pushed up her glasses on her nose and tried to avoid their stares as much as possible. “S-Sorry... I didn’t mean to interrupt. Don’t mind me, I’m just h-here to pick up my l-laundry...” She stuttered. Woah, the tremendous awkwardness she felt at the moment could not be described. As she hurriedly walked over to the washing machine, which was obviously planned by Satan to be between the girl and Jungkook, she almost punched the button and forced the washing machine to stop its program. There were still 20 minutes left until her laundry was ready, but she couldn’t handle to stay any longer in the room and she didn’t feel like returning to retrieve her laundry at a later time when the risk of seeing them again was relatively high, considering them living in the same apartment complex.  It wasn’t that hard anymore for her to curl back in bed and reflect on what life was to find herself with such an embarrassing moment. Somin felt her cheeks starting to heat up as she felt Jungkook’s eyes on her. He was staring down at her and she felt her legs could go jelly at any moment if she did not rush herself. Her thoughts were all over the place and her heart beat pounded loudly in her chest.

What seemed like an eternity, she finally felt relief when the last piece of clothing was forced into her laundry bin and she stepped away from her role as their cockblocker by moving back to where she first was discovered. She shyly gave them a quick bow, before she sped towards the stairs without waiting for their answer. She wasn’t sure if she was turning paranoid, but she thought she heard a faint chuckle from the girl in the background. Great, I must look like a fool to them, Somin sighed as she carried her bin to her room. Fishing out her keys, her mind couldn’t stop but imagine what their possible reactions could be, considering that he had been staring at her for a long time. Was he laughing at her all the time? Especially because of her ridiculous footed onesie? She looked down at her feet and she shyly rubbed them together like she was trying to rub off the childish pink color and its soft fur that completed her look of a 7-year-old.  

“Ooh man...” Somin groaned to herself, when she opened the door to her room and carried the bin with a sulky expression inside. From all the days they could do laundry, it had to be now?

However, after entering her room, Somin felt the heavy weight on her shoulders being lifted up as her comfort zone embraced her. Nobody would judge her for her onesie and dirty hair in this room, and she figured that as long as she could avoid them, she wouldn’t have to face the awkwardness of needing to explain why she hid herself behind a washing machine. On top of that, they might think she was weird and dirty, of course all the credits dedicated to that Ed Sheeran girl.

She plopped herself down on the couch near the bin and she slowly started to fold her laundry, despite being it semi-dry. “Tsk...” Somin muttered to herself, “Most girls don’t even dress up on a Sunday. You are probably just overdressed.” Her hands caressed the fabric, before she pulled out a pair of pants to fold. “Yeah, that must be it. Who puts on lipstick on a Sunday, anyway?”

It might sound crazy, but judging that girl with herself helped her feel better about her own. “Honestly, I find this onesie cool. Pink is my favorite color. There is nothing wrong with showing off my favorite—“

Knock knock!

Somin immediately turned silent and she snapped her head towards the door. Oh no, did someone hear me, she thought to herself shocked. She slowly stood up from her seat and shuffled towards the door. Peeking through the little hole, she saw strands of black hair and the flashing of bunny teeth. Shocked, Somin turned herself around and placed her hand in front of her mouth.

“Why is he at my door?” Somin gasped, as she looked another time to make sure she wasn’t mistaken. Shocked, she tried to calm herself by letting out a slow and steady breath, but the relaxing technique actually made her more anxious. Why was everything against her today? Was this some sort of punishment for her sins she had committed by downloading an extra episode of How to keep up with the Bangtan Boys from Limewire? “Try to play it cool. He probably forgot his keys or something.”

Somin composed herself, before she slowly twisted her doorknob and opened the door.

“H-Hello?” It sounded like a whisper. Jungkook cocked his head and smiled, so wide that it made his eyes narrow and wrinkles started to pop up from around his eye area.

“Hey,” he mumbled, leaning his shoulder against the doorframe, “I figured that you wouldn’t know what you have left behind in the laundromat room.” As he said, he raised his hand and revealed a red laced bra dangling from his finger. Somin turned pale from the sudden shock, when she realized it was hers, but she was never planning to admit it. Never. Ever... Atleast, not to this guy.

Somin tightened her grip on the doorknob and she showed a feigned smile. “I-It’s not mine. I think you are mistaken.”

Jungkook let out a bellowed laughter, as he took a step to the front, urging Somin to step back into her room. “You know... It’s Sunday....I don’t think it’s a good idea if you come inside... And...” Somin stuttered as she was unsure on how to make him leave, but as he closed the door behind him, Somin’s voice got weaker. “Or...Yeah... Ignoring me is also an option.” She felt so awkward around him and Jungkook noticed it instantly with a cock of his head and a smirk. He threw her bra on the couch and stepped around the room, looking around with a big smile, seemingly forgotten that he just invited himself.

“I didn’t remember that your room was this cozy and nice from the last time I visited.” Jungkook said, as he traced his finger across a picture frame hanging up on the wall. Somin blinked with her eyes and nervously pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. “I-I’ll get you a glass of water.” She ignored his question and wandered around a bit before she remembered that her kitchen was the other way around. Jungkook noticed her uneasiness and he chuckled to himself when he saw her head snap into different directions and he saw her rushing towards the refrigerator, but not before bumping her leg against the couch and pretending that it didn’t hurt while it obvious did. She was really cute, Jungkook thought to himself. With his hands in his pockets, he walked over to her refrigerator and laid his arm on its door, surprising Somin when she raised her head once she had grabbed the bottle from the freezer.

“I’m not trying to make myself too comfortable, but I prefer Sprite over water.” Jungkook grinned to her and she froze, face turning paler than a blank sheet. “I-I don’t have Sprite...” She meekly brought out. Jungkook laughed to himself, before he shook his head and gestured. “Water is fine. I was just kidding.”

Somin flashed him a weak smile and she quickly reached for a cup to pour him a glass of water, giving the opportunity for a silence to occur between them. All she could think of was about how to make him leave. His presence was just too much for her right now. She gave him the water and he lightly took a sip, without taking his eyes off her. It made her extremely uncomfortable and she could hear her ears being blocked by the thundering of her pulse. Why did he come into her room in the first place, anyways? He was strange. He was weird.

Jungkook licked his lips and put down his glass on the counter. “You have anything to do, tonight?” Something in his voice sounded amusing, almost as if he was trying to test her.

“Sorry?” Somin asked. She didn’t hear his question due her thoughts that were all over the place, again. Jungkook snorted and cocked his head. “I asked you if you have anything to do tonight. I haven’t seen you around for some time and since it’s Sunday, I figured we could maybe hangout?”

Her eyes widened at his suggestion. “Hangout?” She blurted out and she suddenly realized how stupid she sounded, but she couldn’t help but be surprised that a fuckboy actually asked her to hangout, let alone Jungkook.

“You know, as in watching a movie together or something. Don’t tell me you are going to study on a Sunday evening,” He laughed, but then his face turned serious when Somin just glared at him, “No way...”

“I actually have a test this week. I have to...” That was a lie, but Somin thought Jungkook wouldn’t know. He never cared about school enough to keep track on every test that the teachers had scheduled. He wouldn’t even know how her schedule looked like, so she thought. Jungkook scoffed and he narrowed his eyes by breaking into a cocky smile. “Oh, I see what’s going on. Are you avoiding me?”

More blood and heat rushed to her cheeks when he caught her. She was burning under his stare, no, she was on fire and in danger when he walked over to her, making her back up against the wall. “Is my baby girl avoiding me?”

“No... I-I don’t know what you are talking about?” She stammered, as she searched for a way to put distance between them, but Jungkook was too confident to be fooled and continued to take a step closer.

“You are. This explains your strange behavior in the laundromat room, earlier. In fact, you have been avoiding me for weeks, ever since that kiss happened, haven’t you?” He smirked when he was only inches away from her and she could practically feel his warm breath on her skin, coated with charms that had always effortlessly made her head spin.

“I-I...” Oh god, she was too intimidated and overwhelmed by his presence. On top of that, he was too close. She could smell his scent, which she loved so much but didn’t dare to admit to herself. Her heart fluttered when she finally made eye contact with him and she instantly regretted it. She could feel her legs getting weak under his beautiful brown eyes that were trying to stare right into her soul, but she wasn’t going to let him do that for long.

“C-Can you please move a little back?” She managed to sound bold, which surprised Jungkook. He narrowed his eyes and chuckled. “Baby girl, you don’t like to have me close to you?”

“Isn’t that practically cheating on your girlfriend?”

“Girlfriend?” He scoffed, surprised at the sudden twist. “What does that have to do with us?”

“A-Aren’t you dating that girl at the end of this hallway, then?” Somin blurted out, staring up at him. Ugh, confronting him in her pink footed onesie was not one of the things she had in mind.

“Oh... You mean her. Don’t worry, we are just friends, whereas you... are my baby girl.” His arms snaked around her waist and he gently pulled her closer to his chest. “And much prettier than her.” He whispered in her ear.

“Stop... This is wrong.” Somin weakly brought out, as she placed her hands on his arms, ready to push him away, but he was strong, especially with those muscles in his arms. Oh god.

“What’s so wrong? Me being single and wanting to get closer to the girl I like or that you can’t study on a Sunday evening?” He teased. He was enjoying it so much, knowing how inexperienced she was at the moment. He obviously wanted to get with her, but Somin was so shy and insecure that it blocked her in some kind of way to act normal.

“Both... I mean, does it even matter? This is wrong. There is no possibility that you would like me.”

“Why not? You are cute and adorable. On top of that, you are smart.” He praised, as he leant in and pressed his lips against her neck. Somin let out a soft whimper at the sudden touch. It was over for her. She was completely swept away by him and she had to put her arms around his neck for support. His hands roamed from her hips to the small of her back, where it stopped as he tightened his hug.

“You don’t have to worry about other girls. You are my baby girl, you will always be my favorite.” He whispered and Somin couldn’t help but to smile and feel butterflies in her belly.

“If you say so,” Somin muttered back shyly, as Jungkook pushed her a bit off him so he could look at her face. There was a soft glint in her eyes and it somehow warmed his heart. It was the right moment, he thought. Jungkook dived in for her lips and kissed her slowly. She felt warm on his lips and he felt soft to hers. It was like how she dreamt it. Everything felt so exciting for her.

For the remaining time of the evening, they both decided to watch a movie, but Somin had to admit that she didn’t really knew what the movie really was about. She was constantly distracted by Jungkook trying to get her attention. He was kissing her most of the time and Somin laid in his arms enjoying his warmth.

“To be honest, I didn’t know I would be your type.” Somin admitted, as she slowly looked up at him. Jungkook watched her with hooded eyes and smiled. “You are not, but I would make an exception for you.” He said, already leaning down to press a gentle kiss on her cheek.

“Stop with that sweet talk.” Somin chuckled, as she sat up straight and faced him. “I want a honest answer. When did you start to like me?”

“That’s a secret.” He smirked, as he reached out his hand to grab Somin’s arm. He pulled her in and made her fall on her back on the bed. Surprised, Somin looked at him as Jungkook hovered over her and smiled. “All I am saying is that you are my baby girl.”

Somin grinned wide from his sweet words and wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him down. “Eager, aren’t we?” he whispered, and Somin blushed. “Shut up.”

Jungkook laughed and buried his nose in her neck. His hands grabbed her waist, as he pressed his lips against the crook of her neck. Somin whimpered lightly and Jungkook went ahead to place little kisses on her neck, which soon developed in little love bites.

“Can I stay over?” Jungkook muttered against her skin. Somin immediately nodded and closed her eyes, as she focused on his touch. He was gentle, yet sweet.

It didn’t take long before Somin had fallen asleep and Jungkook laid by her side admiring her. He was supposed to sleep on the couch, but he wouldn’t want to miss her sleeping face for anything, so he secretly sneaked into bed with her and embraced her. She unconsciously pressed herself closer against his chest. Jungkook chuckled, as he caressed her hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead.

“My cute baby girl.” He whispered, before he soon followed and fell asleep too.

 When the morning came and Somin was slowly waking up, she blinked her eyes a few times, before she remembered yesterday and she jolted up in her bed. Flickering her eyes to the couch, she discovered it to be empty with the blankets nicely folded on the arm support.

Was it all a dream, Somin thought to herself. She scanned her room and noticed her laptop sitting at the end of her bed. It wasn’t a dream. They really watched a movie, together. But she figured that he might have left early in the morning to get ready for school. Somin checked her phone for the time and she noticed that she had a unread message from an unknown number. Touching the message to open, Somin smiled to herself when she saw the message.

 Morning, baby girl.

I hope you slept well.

This is my number in case you wondered.

-          Jungkook

 She sighed to herself as she rolled back in her bed. Oh god. Did this mean that they were officially dating? Did she finally have a boyfriend by just being herself? She couldn’t believe, neither could she believe the time that her wall portrayed. It was already half past 9, which meant that courses had already started an hour ago. Widening her eyes, she cursed to herself and bounced out of her bed. Collecting all her books in her backpack, she quickly grabbed some breakfast and when she was about to grab her keys, she froze in the mirror when she saw multiple bruises on her neck. Fuck, love bites.

 A few days later, Somin hasn’t spoken to Jungkook much because of her upcoming test on Thursday. She has been doing study sessions in the library and pulling long nights each day. For some reason, she had a hard time focusing on her books as her phone looked tempting. She wanted to text him, although she didn’t know about what. Everything was still new to her and it was her curiosity and excitement that wanted to try things she usual never did. One of them was texting Jungkook.

When she closed her book for a short study break in the library, she grabbed her phone out of her backpack and lit up the screen. What can I say, Somin thought, shall I ask if he has eaten yet? No, it’s only 5 pm.

She really wanted to talk to him, but she also wondered why Jungkook hasn’t texted her, either for the past few days. Was he also busy studying for his tests? Which means that Somin shouldn’t disturb him by texting him. Urgh, why was dating so hard, she thought but at the same time, she couldn’t help but to keep a smile on her face. Maybe, when she gets home, she’ll knock on his door and ask him if he wanted to cook together with her.

It was easier said than done, when there was no response and his door didn’t open. He wasn’t in his room. “Strange, or was he at the library too, but he didn’t return, yet?” Confused, Somin shrugged her shoulders and headed back into her room. She quickly cooked something for herself, but it seemed like she has overestimated the amount of rice grain in the rice cooker. “Ah, I can give this to Jungkook later if he hasn’t eaten yet.” Somin thought to herself and she neatly placed the rice in the fridge with some side dishes.

The next day, Somin finished her test and waited for Jungkook in the hallway. His classes were finished at the same time as hers, but she managed to be quick and see all the students walk out of the class. When she nonchalantly leaned against the door, she overheard a voice which made her heart race. “Yes, I’ll be coming tonight. See you there.”

Jungkook walked out of his class and Somin smiled. “Hey!” she chirped, which surprised Jungkook. He looked at her shortly, before he gave her a quick smile.

“Hey! I didn’t see you there.” He said, placing a hand on the small of her back. He was guiding her to walk away from his class, until they have reached his locker. “How was the test?” He asked, as he opened his locker and placed his books inside. Somin cocked her head and stuck out her two thumbs. “You can be proud of your smart girlfriend, because I aced the test!” Somin laughed. Jungkook’s face fell shortly, but Somin was too cheerful to notice it. He ruffled her hair and tried to smile, what looked more like a grimace. “Girlfriend?” He chuckled. Somin blinked her eyes, before she fell silent.

“Too early?” She whispered, to which Jungkook shook his head and laughed. He closed his locker and turned to her.

“I prefer to call you my baby girl. I’m more into nicknames. Anyways, I still have some classes to attend. I’ll see you tonight?” He said, before he stepped back and waved at her. Somin nodded and waved back. “Yeah, sure. Good luck.” She smiled at him, before he disappeared around the corner and she was left standing at his locker.

Flickering her eyes over at the green door, she grinned wide when she saw Jungkook’s name. She couldn’t believe that this was actually happening. It almost felt like a dream to her.

However, dreams mostly don’t last very long, and it wouldn’t take long for Somin to know that love is two-faced.

 “What are you talking about? Why won’t you go to that frat party tonight?” Somin’s friend, Yeri, exclaimed through the phone. Somin wasn’t feeling to go out tonight, but Yeri seemed to have a different opinion about it. “It’s one of the biggest party of this semester. You can’t miss it, besides, there will be some hot and cute boys.”

Somin rolled her eyes as she took a seat on the couch and started to play with the hem of her sweater. “Nah, you know how I think about frat parties. They literally make me puke.” Somin said, but Yeri just sighed. “That’s why you should go to this one. It will prove you wrong. Come on! Just one time!” She begged and Somin sighed.

“Fine, fine! But I’ll be leaving when it is not fun.”

“Oh god, you won’t. A few hot boys are going to be there, especially Jungkook. You know that neighbor you have been crushing on for so long...”

“Yes, about that... Yeri, there is something I need to tell yo—“

“I’m coming, mom geez! Calm down!” Yeri interrupted Somin, “Sorry, Somin. I have to hang up now. My mom wants me to help her with grocery shopping.”

Somin laughed and smiled. “Yeah, sure. No problem, we can talk about this later. Before you leave, text me the address of that frat party.”

“Okay! See you tonight!”

“Bye!”

Somin pressed the red button and she looked at her phone. Shortly after, she received a text from Yeri with the address of the frat party. Apparently, it didn’t seem to be that far from her dorms. Somin smiled to herself and decided to study for a bit, before she grabs some dinner and take a shower.

 “Do you want a drink?” Yeri yelled in her ear as the music was much louder than their voices combined. “What?” Somin yelled back, but Yeri shook her head and grabbed her arm to guide her towards the stall with the drinks. She gave Somin a red cup, as she poured herself a strange blue liquid. Somin looked in her cup and frowned. Nudging her friend, she leant into her ear.

“What is this? You didn’t pour me a drink.” Somin yelled, but Yeri just smiled. “You are going to play one round of beer pong with me.” She said, and she pulled Somin to the table with a group of students, seemingly to enjoy their selves as one of them threw the ping pong ball into a cup. Somin looked at them and it somehow scared her a bit that some of them were already wasted. She didn’t know how the rules were set with this game and how much she would have to drink if she lost.

Pushing her cup into Yeri’s hand, she shook her head. “No, no, you can play it alone. I am not going to drink tonight.”

“What?”

“I SAID I DIDN’T WANT TO PLAY THIS GAME!”

Yeri nodded shortly that she heard her and a weak pout formed on her lips. “WHY NOT? IT’S FUN!!”

“Yeah, I know, but...” It was then when Somin’s eyes scanned through the crowd that she saw a familiar figure dancing on the floor. It turned her silent and she couldn’t help but to keep her eyes stuck on his moves. The lack of answering her caused Yeri to look at her and then follow her gaze towards the dancing figure.

“Oooooooh... Crush alert!” She chirped loudly in her ear, which caused Somin to snap out of her trance and blush. “Come, let’s go dance with him!”

But Somin refused to follow her. She grabbed Yeri’s arm to stop her and she then pointed to the other people standing around him. It were his friends, but some of them were known to be a bully underneath the nerds, and Somin was one of the few who caught them in the act of stealing money from other students. Yeri was aware of it too and she felt relieved that Somin warned her, or she would have thrown herself into the fire.

“On a second thought, watching from a distance isn’t that bad. I’m sure you will have plenty of chances to talk to him tonight, without his friends that is.” Yeri said, bobbing her head on the rhythm of the music. Once Jungkook has stopped dancing, the other clapped for him and his friends stormed towards him, pulling him into a tight hug. Jungkook smiled to his friends, before he looked up through the crowd and he and Somin crossed eyes.

Jungkook smiled lightly at her, before he averted his eyes and started to jump with his friends, not caring anymore about Somin. Yeri looked at them both, before she snapped her head at Somin and raised an eyebrow. “What was that?”

“What was what?” Somin absentmindly asked, before she turned her head to look at Yeri with a dreamy look.

“Holy Jesus! Look at you! You are smitten for that boy!” Yeri laughed, which caused Somin to blush more. “I bet he likes you too! But before you throw yourself out there, don’t forget that Jungkook is still a fuckboy.”

“Nah, I don’t think so. It’s just a label to scare girls off. He is actually really kind and sweet when you know him personally.” Somin said, but Yeri looked at her with disdain.

“I know he is a fuckboy just by looking at him. Come on, he must have had thousands of girls in his bed, before. Good rumors don’t spread by itself, without having a small bit of truth in them.” Yeri remarked and Somin shot her look. Yeri raised her hands and backed off. “Okay, okay. Just saying. I just don’t want you to be involved in something you are not ready for yet.”

Somin rolled her eyes and laughed. “I’ll be fine. He’s really kind.”

“Uh yeah, almost to every girl. That’s his trademark as a fuckboy.” Yeri retorted with an obvious tone, but she quickly shut up when Somin shot her a look again.

“Don’t worry. Anyways, I need to use the restroom. Could you get me an actual drink, instead of a ticket to wasteland, while I am gone?” Somin asked, to which Yeri nodded. Somin left her spot and after a bit of searching and bumping into some people, she finally found the restroom. There were a few typical and superficial girls standing in the bathroom, staring at their reflection as they touched up their makeup.

Somin quickly walked into a cubicle and sat down. What seemed like a calm moment for Somin, it was interrupted by the annoying laughing of the girls. However, she couldn’t help but to eavesdrop on them.

“Did you see him dance? He looked so hot in that shirt covered with sweat.”

“Yes, oh my god! It almost became see-through. I bet he is great in bed with those abs and muscles.”

Somin supported her chin with her hand and frowned. “Were they talking about Jungkook?” Somin thought to herself, which made her heart jump. The girls giggled slightly, before they continued and Somin wished she didn’t hear it.

“Oh right, speaking of sex. Didn’t Jungkook sleep with Chaeyoung yesterday?”

“No effin’ way! Yesterday?”

“Was that the reason why he wasn’t in his room, yesterday?” Somin gasped and she quickly covered her mouth, hoping they didn’t hear her. Luckily, they didn’t as their gossip just continued.

“Yes, Jimin told me. Apparently, Chaeyoung lost a bet and she had to fuck him, and knowing Jungkook, he fucks everyone he knows.  Chaeyoung is such a slut.”

“Wasn’t Jungkook actually dating? I heard him talking about a certain girl at his dorms in Ms. Davis lecture.”

Somin widened her eyes. Her heart jumped, as she believed that they were going to talk about her. But sadly...

“You mean that Ed Sheeran girl? What’s her name, again? Ugh... I drank too much to remember her name, but she is here tonight. Jungkook was bragging about her coming tonight, but I doubt they are dating. It seems more to me that he is just looking for some quick sex.”

The other girl scoffed. “As expected. Jungkook isn’t even the type to settle down with a girl. Even the words ‘girlfriend’ and ‘relationships’ sickened him.”

“Right. I wouldn’t either if I was a boy and had his looks, haha.”

“Oh! Should we bet on him tonight? I bet he is going to eat out that Ed Sheeran’s girl.”

“Sounds great. How much are you going to bet on? I was actually rooting for him to fuck that girl until he got her walking side by side~”

“Oh, I like that song! We’ll see. I’m going to put out 50 dollars.”

“Deal. One of us is going to be rich tonight.” They laughed at each other, before they finally left and the bathroom was silent again.

Somin flushed the toilet and walked out of the cubicle with a pale face. She felt like throwing up, despite not even having one drop of alcohol in her system. It was sickening to hear them. It was awful to know this through a bathroom conversation. Somin supported herself on the washing table, before she looked at herself in the mirror. Tears has formed in her eyes and they were making their way down her cheeks. She lightly sniffed through her nose, before she quickly turned on the tap and splashed water in her face. She felt disgusted to know that she probably didn’t mean anything to Jungkook. She felt so stupid to actually believe his words, because she really believed him when he said he liked her, while in fact, he was just trying to get into her pants.

Clenching her fist, she patted her face dry and let out a heavy sigh. She wanted to confront him about it. She wanted to know if the girls were telling the truth. She wanted to know if Jungkook actually cared about her with his lies. If those stereotypes of fuckboys never falling for nerds were true and he was actually cheating on her. Cheating, did he even see her as his girlfriend?

Somin scoffed to herself, before she walked out of the bathroom in search for Yeri. Like expected, she was standing near the counter of drinks, holding two blue cups up and she beamed when she saw Somin approaching.

“Took you a while! You almost missed the best part. Come—Are you alright?” Yeri’s face was painted with concern once she saw Somin’s pale expression. Somin lightly brushed her off and shook her head. She didn’t want to talk about it. All she wanted was to find Jungkook and talk with him.

“Do you know where Jungkook is?” She asked her, which surprised Yeri. She broke into a smile and turned her around to point at the couch. “He’s there, on the couch. Why? You want to make your move?” She raised an eyebrow, but Somin didn’t pay attention to her. She was already squeezing herself between the people, until she saw black strands of hair sticking out from behind the couch, but surprisingly, he wasn’t alone.

Somin narrowed her eyes and stopped once she stood across the couch. There was a girl with him, leaning her head on his shoulder and joking with him. It didn’t really occur to her, until now that she find the girl’s laugh annoying, unlike that time in the laundromat room. Even if the music was loud, Somin could clearly make out her voice above the music. She bit her lip and she frowned. She couldn’t believe her eyes. She felt her heart stopping when Jungkook leant into her. Everything around her stopped when she watched him kiss her. She felt how her heart started to ache and her dream was shattered into tiny little pieces.

He played with her feelings.

The kiss proceeded into a deeper one and it disgusted Somin. She was angry and jealous at the same time and it would be unfair if she just left without him knowing. Without him knowing how much pain he had inflicted to her.

“Jungkook!” Somin yelled above the music, which made people snap their heads at her. The girl frowned when Jungkook broke off the kiss, looking surprised around at the sudden mention of his name. His eyes wandered around until it landed on Somin and he stared at her frowning.

Somin’s tears were already threatening to fall as she couldn’t see him clearly anymore, only that there were figures approaching her and nudging her shoulder.

“Who do you think you are? You just spoiled their fun.” A guy said, as he smirked and tried to push her away, but Somin stood frozen on the spot. His friends were all looking at her, which somehow took away her courage to be confident and face Jungkook.

“Do you know her, Jungkook?” They asked him, to which he flickered his eyes, but before he could give an answer, someone was already before him.

“She is one of the nerds,” A boy named Hoseok said, before he smirked at her, “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be studying for your tests with the other nerds?”

People crowded around her and Hoseok walked over to her, poking into her shoulder. “These parties aren’t really for you. You don’t belong here. Go back home.”

“I-I need to talk to Jungkook. Please, let me through.” Somin said, avoiding his eye contact as she tried to push past him, but he just pushed her back. She stumbled a bit and eyed him.

“I told you to go home! Don’t make me repeat my words.” Hoseok scoffed, before he was backed by a few more people. Somin cowered a bit under his intimidation, but she didn’t want to give up so easily.

“Please let me talk to Jungkook.”

“Jungkook?” He laughed, surprised that he didn’t hear her wrong, “If you have something stupid to say, say it here. I’ll tell him.”

Somin stayed silent, but that seemed to trigger Hoseok’s irritation. “Yah,” he said, pushing her shoulder again. “Go ahead! Tell me!” He was pushing her harder and harder, until he was too strong for her and Somin stumbled back and fell down on the ground, earning lots of laughter from the people around her.

“She’s so weak.” One of them said, and Hoseok cocked his head. “Know your position, sweetie. This isn’t a place for you to share your calculus and geometry.”

Somin bit her lip as she could no longer hold back her tears for being treated like that. Why were they all so mean, she thought, and to make it worse, Hoseok grabbed a cup from someone and splashed the liquid onto her. Somin gasped and looked at everyone who made fun of her.

“Hey! That was uncalled for!” A familiar voice said as he grabbed onto Hoseok’s shoulder and turned him around. Somin sobbed lightly and looked up to see Jungkook staring down at her. He looked concerned, but Somin was too hurt to meet his eyes. She quickly stood up from her position and ran away. She could no longer stand the pressure they gave her.  

“Somin! Wait!” She could hear Jungkook calling after her, but she ignored him and ran away from the party.

After it happened, Jungkook wasn’t in the mood to party anymore for the rest of the night, whereas his friends tried to cheer him up and prevent him from attacking Hoseok. He was so angry at him for treating her like that, even if he wasn’t that innocent either. He knew damn well that Somin was not only hurt by Hoseok’s attitude. He felt so guilty and torn when he saw Somin’s expression. What was he even thinking. For the first time in a long time, he walked all alone back to his dorms after he was unable to find Somin. With his hands in his pockets, he wondered if Somin had returned back to her room, probably crying. He wondered if he should knock on her door and apologize for Hoseok’s attitude. But then, it was his own fault too. It would be too rude of him to show up on her doorstep right after he kissed another girl. It wasn’t his intention for Somin to know. To be honest, he wasn’t even expecting her in that party. He thought that Somin hated frat parties, but aside from that, she was there and she saw him.

Whatever was going to happen, Jungkook had to talk to her and he thought checking up on her wouldn’t be that bad, just to be sure she has returned safely to her room. He dragged his feet across the floor, his heart heavy at the thought that Somin would be angry at him. Once he turned around the corner, he saw a figure sitting down next to his door.

The person was resting her head on her knees  with her legs pulled in, seemingly trying to make itself as small as possible in the hallway. A soft sob escaped from that person and Jungkook immediately recognized the soft voice. He widened his eyes and ran towards her, kneeling down to check if she was okay.

“Somin, what are you doing here this late outside?”

Somin raised her head shortly to look at him and she started to cry. Big tears rolled down her cheeks and it broke Jungkook’s heart to see her like that. “What’s wrong, baby girl, tell me?”

He cupped her face to wipe away her tears with his thumbs but that only made her cry harder. Her face was warm too and there was a noticeable blush on her cheek.

“I-I can’t enter my room. I lost my keys.” She whined, and an overwhelming smell of alcohol entered his nose.

“Are you drunk, baby girl?”

Her shoulders shook and she let out a laugh. “N-N-No... You are! I got dumped by a boy. You should drink!” She hiccupped at the end of the sentence, which made Jungkook suppress a small smile. Despite the circumstances, he found it funny and cute that Somin was drunk. Suddenly, Somin raised her both arms and laughed hysterically, surprising Jungkook as he fell back and stared at her.

“Wooooh! I think aliens have stolen my keys. They are never to be trusted, bad bad aliens!” Somin said, frowning as she raised her finger and tried to point at him.

“Baby girl—“

“Why do you call me baby girl? Do I look like a baby to you?” She accused him, feigning that she was offended. Jungkook laughed to himself and grabbed her arms. “Let’s get you inside. It’s freezing outside.”

“I CAN’T GO INSIDE! THE ALIENS STOLE MY KEYS!!” She yelled, surprising Jungkook yet again and he quickly hushed her by covering her mouth. Somin let out a muffled sound, as she stared at him through eyes filled with tears.

“Keep your voice down. Some people are sleeping at this hour.” Jungkook reminded her, but Somin was too drunk to really care. However, she quickly nodded so that Jungkook could remove his hand.

“You know, you are quite handsome.” She whispered, when Jungkook stood up and searched for his keys. Jungkook simply smirked as he looked down at her who was admiring him with an open mouth. Once he found his keys, he opened the door and kneeled down to help Somin off the ground, but as childish as she was, she was more trying to yank him down.

“We need to find my keys. Aliens might be boarding their ship soon and I will never find my keys again.” Her voice sounded high-pitched and it seemed to Jungkook that she was actually convinced that aliens had stolen her keys. Jungkook let out a laugh at how ridiculous she sounded, before he buried his face in her neck to snake his arms around her waist.

“We’ll go find them in my room, baby girl.” He responded, before he helped her up and stumbled with her inside, tightly held onto her.

“Wheeee!” Somin beamed, as she grabbed the door and slammed it shut behind Jungkook. “We should look in your bathroom first! They love bathtubs! Tubs! Tubs! Tubs!”

Jungkook frowned and put her softly down on the couch. “How much did you drink, baby girl?” He eyed her long, before he walked over to his kitchen to fetch her a water bottle.

“Woah, your ceiling is soooo coool. It can twist on its own.” Somin squealed and Jungkook raised an eyebrow. He walked back to her, but before he could give her the water, Somin stood up from the couch and ran towards his sink. Shocked, Jungkook turned himself around and tried to warn her.

“Wait--! Somin, you can’t throw up in the si—“

There she went. Jungkook winced and he turned his head away as Somin threw up in his sink. But a small smile got up to his lips as he watched her panic. It must be her first time to be drunk and throw up. He stood up from his seat and went over to collect her hair into a ponytail, even though the smell was disgusting. Somin pouted and wiped off her lips with her hand once she was done. Since Jungkook was standing behind her, she twirled herself around and stood on her toes to give Jungkook a quick kiss.

“Omg, baby girl... You should rinse your mouth before kissing me.” Jungkook let out, as he pulled a disgusted expression and tried to wipe his lips. Somin smiled and winked at him lazily, as she lightly pushed him aside and then she threw herself on the couch, rolling over on her back.

“Do you want to hear about my break-up story?” She questioned, looking at his ceiling. Jungkook pushed himself off the sink and he slowly walked over to sit next to her. Like she was expecting it, Somin raised her head and waited for Jungkook to place his thigh under it. Jungkook rolled his eyes smiling, before he shove closer towards her and she put her head down on his thigh.

“Which break-up story? You know, baby girl, you are quite talkative when you are drunk.” Jungkook said, as he stroke a strand behind her ear. Somin bit her lip and smiled.

“I’m not drunk. I-I-I just don’t feel like caring about anything at the moment. I don’t want to hide my secrets. It’s too bothersome... And tiiiiring!” She chirped, before she closed her eyes when Jungkook cupped her cheek and moved down to the place where her jaw and neck met with a lovingly smile, as his thumb gently rubbed her jawline.

“That’s what alcohol does to you.” Jungkook chuckled and watched her with hooded eyes. He loved to feel her warm and soft skin with those innocent eyes staring at him. A look of disbelief flashed through her eyes as silent overtook them and Somin was lost for words as she stared at his features. He was extremely handsome, Somin thought to herself, but she cleared her throat and sat up right. Jungkook watched her as she replaced herself and put her hand on the other side of his lap, hoisting herself on his lap. His hands snaked around her waist and held onto her, in case she would fall back. Their faces were only inches away and as Somin stared into his eyes, she cocked her head.

“Why did you kiss that girl? Don’t you like me?” Somin whispered bravely. If it wasn’t for her being drunk, she wouldn’t have been able to ask him so straightforward, let alone stare into his eyes while doing so.

“Why wouldn’t I like my baby girl?” Jungkook muttered, and he felt her move one of her legs over his lap to sit down on his lap, closely on his crotch, so she could face him properly. Raising his eyebrows, he smiled to himself and looked at her, “What are you trying to do, baby girl?”

“Then tell me, what do you like about your baby girl?” She coyly said, and then, she moved her hips, grinding against him as she placed her arms around his neck. Jungkook grabbed her hips and stopped her, but not before he let out a soft sound from delight.

“You are funny. I didn’t know you could be like this, baby girl?” He smirked and he leant in to press his lips against her neck. Somin closed her eyes and moved her neck to expose herself more to him. His lips sucked lightly against her skin and she let out a soft moan.

“Sleep with me, Jungkook.” She said, but Jungkook tightened his grip on her hips, before he moved his head back and stared at her with hooded eyes.

“You’re drunk. I’m not going to sleep with you when you are drunk.”

Somin chuckled to herself and cocked her head. “You wouldn’t either if I was sober.” The harsh tone in her voice threw Jungkook off and he frowned. “What are you talking about?”

Somin stared back at him with hooded eyes, seemingly disappointed from the lack of contact. “Come on, you can’t fool me. I know you are playing with my feelings. I know that you don’t really like me, or else we would have slept with each other by now.”

Jungkook twitched one corner of his lips, before he fully smirked and stared deep down in her eyes. “Baby girl, is your insecurity talking to me? You are special. One of the things that has me drawn to you is your innocence and I want to keep that. I like how you are shy. I like how you would act uncomfortable around me.”

“That’s bullshit.” Somin said before she pushed herself off him and stumbled away from him. Jungkook cocked his head and rubbed his neck. It surely was not easy for him to talk to a drunk Somin, but he wasn’t going to let her be like this.

“Somin...” He began, but stopped when he realized it was the first time in a long time he had called her name directly, “This conversation, let’s talk about it when you are sober.”

Somin turned her around and smirked. “Great, let’s see if my sober self still wants to talk to you after tonight.” She said, before she fanned herself with her hand and flickered her eyes towards his chest. “It’s warm. Can I have one of those shirts you are wearing?”

Jungkook frowned, but once he realized what Somin was planning to do, he hurriedly walked over to her and grabbed the hem of her shirt she was desperately trying to pull up.

“Let go of my shirt! It’s waarrrm!” She whined, but Jungkook gulped as he tightly held onto her shirt.

“Baby girl, I don’t think your sober self would appreciate this.” He chuckled, but Somin pushed him off and he stumbled back surprised.

“What’s wrong with taking off my shirt when it is warm? You are hella weird.” She scoffed, before she lifted her shirt and took it off without hesitation. Jungkook pinched his nosebridge and sighed amused. Taking the hem of his own shirt, he pulled it over his head and looked at her. Giving the shirt to her, Somin smiled and looked at his chest. She was in awe of his body and slim waist, but the alcohol rushed through her mind and made her forget how her sober self would have drooled over him.

“You are crazy, baby girl,” Jungkook muttered to himself, “Totally crazy.”

Somin cocked her head and smiled at him, before clumsily pulling his shirt over her head. “Not as crazy as you are for me.” Jungkook saw her struggling and he stepped closer to help her get her arms through the arm holes. Once she managed to get the shirt on, Jungkook cupped her jaw gently with one of his hand as his fingers skimmed over her cheek and brushed a few strands behind her ear. His eyes were observing hers and a faint glint of adoration flashed through his eyes, before he bent down and kissed her lips. “Always crazy for you, baby girl.” He muttered against her lips. Somin let out a satisfied sigh, before she smirked and stepped back, putting distance between them. Her hand searched for his and they soon intertwined their hands and she pulled him towards the bed.

“What am I going to do with you, baby girl?” He said, placing little kisses in her neck. Somin hummed a reply and pulled him down on her, once she felt the bed underneath her.

“I want you to eat me out.”

Jungkook gasped lightly from the sudden surprise, before he continued and slipped his hand down the inside of her thigh, lightly skimming the skin over there with his thumb. “You’re so horny. It’s so unlike you.”

“I heard two girls talking about you. They made a bet on you whether you would eat out a girl or fuck her until she can’t walk.”

“Hmmm... And what option do you want to choose? What do you want to get from me, my baby girl?”

“I want to experience both with you.”

He raised an eyebrow in amusement. “Hmmm... It sounds tempting... But I don’t think your sober self would appreciate that, baby girl.” He hovered over her and kissed the place under her jaw. She whined lightly, before her hands traced over his back and felt every rib protruding through his skin on his sides.

“Stop talking... I don’t care what my sober self would think. I only care what I want at the moment and that is you.”

“Tempting, baby girl. You should get drunk more often.” He smiled, before he placed smaller kisses on her neck.

His cock was painfully throbbing in his pants and he wanted to have her, but it wasn’t something he had planned for tonight. Atleast, not this soon. First, he wanted to treasure her and then love her. He want to kiss her so much, until there was no more skin he hadn’t traced his lips over and tasted. He wanted her just like she was. He wanted her to stay innocent and herself without having to show her body. Without having to feel pressure to get with him, because the way how she was right now, was captivating and charming enough for him to go crazy over.

Somin laid down her head and she watched him with hooded eyes. The drowsiness started to kick in and he saw her struggling to keep them open. Leaning forward, Jungkook pressed a kiss on her forehead and cheek. “Go sleep. You must be tired, baby girl.” He said, in between his kisses, but Somin didn’t want to listen to him. She wanted him as much as he wanted her, but the sleep was slowly catching up to her. All the nights she had spent studying was taking its toll on her. In the end, she agreed and her eyes were closed and her breathing was steady. Jungkook smiled to himself and placed himself next to her. Carefully as if she was made of porselain, he pulled the blankets over her and placed his arm under her head so he could have her close by him all night. Cuddling was what she liked and she wouldn’t believe it if it actually happened with Jungkook.

Smirking to himself, he hugged her closely and pressed a kiss near her temple.

“Goodnight, my baby girl.”

[randomfanfictiontime]

No Memory

Summary: Before he was taken into the Maze, you and Newt had a son. Now, almost three years later, Newt shows up again in the Scorch. Except, he doesn’t remember you. His memories were erased. And then he meets his son. (Sorry, the summary is crappy. I wasn’t exactly sure how to sum it up.)

Pairing: Newt x Reader

Word Count: 5362 (I’m so sorry. I got a little bit carried away.)

Warnings: Fluff, possibly some angst if you squint really hard.

(A/N): This idea came to me when I was listening to ‘Rockabye’ by Clean Bandit. So it’s very loosely based off of that song. Enjoy!

The knocks, no... pounds, on your door continued relentlessly, sounding rushed. Grabbing your gun, the one you had always kept on your belt, you looked outside of the shabby cloth that you called curtains. Rolling your eyes, you clicked the safety back on, tucked the gun back into your waistband, and opened the door.

"Jorge... to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Long time no see, chica."

"Let's skip the formalities. You only come when you want something. So, what do you want?"

"Help." Raising an eyebrow, you moved to the side to allow him inside.

"With what?" Just as you were about to close the door, a hand shot out and stopped you. Jerking the door back, you came face to face with a teenage boy, about 16, and a bunch of other teens behind him.

"Uh..."

"Them." Jorge walked up behind you, gesturing for the boys to enter.

"Boys, this is the woman I was telling you about. (Y/N)."

"So, she can help us?" The boy who had almost ran into you spoke up, skeptical. He looked hauntingly familiar to you. You couldn't quite put your finger on it. Shaking your head slightly, you cleared your thoughts.

"Help with what? And who am I helping? What're your names?"

"I'm Thomas," the boy, who seemed to be the leader by this point, stepped up to you and held out his hand, allowing you to shake it. He continued down the line of boys, naming them.

Jorge plopped onto the scraggly couch, propping his feet onto your coffee table, interrupting Thomas.

"Yeah, a bunch of names. Not important. We need your help getting to the Right Arm." You turned towards him.

"The Right Ar..." Then it all clicked. Spinning around once again, you pointed to Thomas, now knowing where you knew him from.

"You're... the Maze survivors?" It was more of a statement rather than a question. He nodded. Your gaze swept over the small group. You recognized a few of them, others you couldn't recall. And then your gaze landed on the last one. Your heart immediately filled with relief.

"How'd you know?" Thomas broke your thoughts. You opened your mouth to answer but Jorge cut you off.

"She used to work for WICKED." Glaring at him, you tried to hurriedly fix the situation.

"I don't anymore. I quit a long time ago." Thomas relaxed a bit but you could tell the he still didn't fully trust you.

"Why?" A guy, you remembered his name was Minho, spoke up.

"Because they sent someone very important to me up into the Maze." Your gaze flicked over to Isaac's -or Newt, as his friends knew him-. Unbeknownst to you, Thomas had followed your gaze, trying to puzzle the lingering looks together.

After a few more moments of silence, you staring at him the whole time while he looked around at the little knick-knacks and trinkets that you had lying around, you cleared your throat, spinning on your heel to face Jorge once again.

"What makes you think that I can find that camp. In case you haven't noticed, I don't get out very much. Only for food and supplies. Which I would offer you guys but I have a very limited supply and I greatly need them." Some of them nodded, understanding that it was survival of the fittest, some of them rolled their eyes, probably thinking of how rude and inhospitable you were being. You didn't care either way.

"I know that you know the city more than any of us."

"Okay but what does that have to do with going all the way into the mountains?"

"You realize you just said mountains, right, hermana?" Pausing for a moment, you sighed at your stupidity.

"Okay, fine. I know about where they reside. But that doesn't mean squat. I'd have to actually journey there to find them."

"So then come with us." There it was. The same voice. The same one that you hadn't heard in almost three years. The same one that plagued your thoughts and dreams.

Your gaze found itself locked into warm, honey-brown ones. The same ones that used to make you melt every time you saw them. Belonging to the same face that also plagued every thought and every dream. The same face that made your eyes tear up.

Taking in a deep breath, you collected your thoughts.

"I can't."

"Well why not?" This was Thomas.

"I have... priorities here."

"Yeah, like what?" Minho.

"That isn't your concern, now is it?"

"I bet as soon as we leave, she's going to rat us out to WICKED. And she probably has plenty of food and water, she just doesn't want to share." You gritted your teeth. Looking back, you knew that Minho was always a pain.

"Look. You don't know jack about me. So I suggest you keep trap shut unless you want an ass full of gunpowder."

"Ooh, scary. You think a gun scares me? Honey, we've faced Grievers. I think that we can handle a little girl with a-" in the next moment, you had him pinned against the wall, a gun to his head. It wasn't as if you were really going to pull the trigger. You just wanted to prove a point.

"How would you feel if this little girl were to blow your brains out, right here and now?" He didn't say a word, just glared.

"Mama?" A tiny voice sounded behind you, making you immediately stuff the gun into your waistband and step away from the boy who was readjusting his shirt.

"Who is that?" Thomas asked, frozen to his place.

"My priority." Sending a glare Minho's way, you walked over to the little boy, who was clutching a blanket and a scraggly teddy, dressed in blue pajamas. You bent down to his level.

"Hey, sweetheart. What are you doing down here? You should be upstairs sleeping in the new bed that I made you."

"N-nightmare." He stumbled over the word a bit. You knew that he was about to cry. You looked back at the men in your living room, finding all of their eyes trained on you and the little boy, before turning back to him.

"What about?" He sniffled, looking around at the strange people, feeling shy.

"Them." You knew who he was talking about. WICKED. He continued, "T-They took you...j-just like they did daddy." Your eyes flew to Newt's almost involuntarily. Tears dribbled over his rosy cheeks as you brought him in for a hug.

"Shhh, it's okay. It's okay, sweetheart. No one's going to take mommy away from you. I'll never leave you." You cooed, petting the back of his head. The boys looked at you and the boy in awe. Once it was clear that he wasn't going to let go, you grasped him under his arms and lifted him up onto your hips.

"No. I don't wanna go." He cried, knowing that you were about to take him back upstairs. "I wanna stay with you."

"Okay, sweetheart. But mommy's in the middle of very important business." He lifted his head off of your shoulder, teary, brown orbs staring back into your (E/C) ones.

"I pwomise I'll be good."

"Okay, go over there and play with your toys." He nodded and a small smile was set onto your face as you let him down, kissed his forehead, and watched him run over to his clutter of action figures.

"Is that your son?" Thomas asked, looking over at him. Subtly, he looked over to Newt. He was slowly fitting the pieces together.

"Yeah."

Only then had you realized just how much he looked like Newt. The little boy had hauntingly similar features to that of the brit. Blonde, fluffy hair covered his head, coming down to rest in front of his honey-brown eyes. Even his jaw line was similar. Of course, your son had some of your features as well. He had your chin, your lips, your eyelashes. He was the perfect mixture.

You could tell that some of the guys were beginning to notice the similarities. You needed a distraction.

"Actually, guys. I actually might have enough water for all of you. I'll go get some." You couldn't get into the kitchen fast enough. You knew that if you stayed, questions would be asked. Questions that you had no explanation for. At least none that wouldn't freak anyone out.

"What's his name?" You jumped, nearly knocking the glasses that you had already filled with water over. Turning around, you saw Thomas standing in the doorway. The others were out of earshot so there was no danger of them listening in. You both knew that.

Silence passed over the two of you, save for the mutters of the others. Thomas waited expectantly. There was no way you were going to avoid it now. Sighing in defeat, you slugged over to an empty chair, nodding for Thomas to take the other one. After another moment of silence, you spoke up.

"Isaac. His name is Isaac." He nodded, looking back over to the child. There was still a clear view into the living room, where you could keep an eye on him.

"How old are you?"

"I'm 18."

"How old is he?"

"30 months. Two and a half years." You knew what he was getting at before he even said it.

"He looks like his father." His orbs moved to you, staring down at your hands.

"How'd you know? Aside from the resemblance."

"I saw the way you looked at him. And whenever he said "daddy" you looked straight at Newt. No one else. Also, he has an accent." It was true. Isaac's accent sounded like Newt's. Seeing as though Newt was the father, it was only normal that he had inherited the accent.

You let out a dry laugh.

"You always were the observant one."

"So you did know us." It was more of a statement than a question.

"Yes. I worked along side of you. I saw them go into the maze. I saw everything."

"Why'd you quit?"

"You had been begging me for months to help plan an escape. I was always skeptical. Of course I didn't like what WICKED was doing to them, but I had no where else to go. My parents were dead, my only friends were there."

"What made you change your mind?"

"They sent him in. I had just found out that I was pregnant. After that, I had been plotting with you. And then I watched him jump. That was the last straw. I left as soon as I could."

Tears pooled in your eyes.

"I-I didn't even get to tell him." You cursed yourself, a tear escaping.

"I'm sorry." You mumbled, wiping the tear away.

"It's okay. You can cry, it's not like I'm going to judge you." You didn't respond, looking through the gap at your son. He was babbling happily and you heard him shout with joy. Newt popped into view as he cautiously sat down in front him, picking up one of Isaac's action figures. You could hear Isaac giving off commands as he and Newt played. The sight broke the wall of tears in your eyes.

"You have no idea how much I've wanted to see that. That's all I've ever wanted. Isaac reunited with his dad. Never thought it would happen though." You let out a little laugh as you looked on. Thomas' gaze flickered between you and Newt.

"You should go talk to him."

"And say what? "Hey, you don't remember me but we have a son and here he is?""

"Yes!"

"No!" You practically shouted, staring back at Thomas. "Are you insane? Think of what his reaction would be." Even though Thomas didn't want to admit it, he knew you were right.

"Look, I would appreciate it if you didn't say anything to the others. They don't need any more drama in their lives, especially Newt."

"But, shouldn't your son know at least?"

"No. Please. If Isaac found out that his father was right in front of him, and then watch him leave again.... he's only two."

"He's going to find out someday." Without another word, you got up and walked into the living room. The water glasses were beyond forgotten. Upon walking in, you saw Isaac and Newt still sat on the floor, playing action figures.

"Hermano here decided to break the silence and play with the little guy, seeing as Thomas was in there with you and no one else would." Jorge's voice sounded behind you as he watched the two play. Walking over to the two, you knelt beside your son.

"Hey, buddy." His eyes lit up as he noticed that you were there.

"I found a new fwend to pway with!"

"Oh really? Well that's good. New friends are always good." You could feel Newt's eyes on you.

"And guess what!"

"What?"

"His name is Newt!"

"Really?" This time, you allowed yourself to look at him. It took everything you had to not say anything out of line.

"Yeah! His name is just like daddy's!" The small smile on your face disappeared completely, eyes widening. Yes, you told Isaac about his father. Of course you did. You told him everything. From the moment that you both had met to him getting taken by WICKED.

"I'm named after my daddy, you know. His name was Isaac too!" He stated proudly. "Wasn't it, mommy?"

"Uh, yes honey. It was. But we should prob-" before you could finish your sentence, Isaac leaned in to whisper in your ear.

"I think daddy is here, mommy." You held your breath.

"W-What makes you think that?"

"Look!" This time he had spoke normally as he rushed to grab his teddy bear. Plopping back down into your lap, he opened a secret hatch within the teddy's back. Pulling out a slightly bent photo, slightly riddled with age, he held it out in front of him.

"See! Look! He looks like daddy!" By the way Newt's eyes widened, looking at the back of the photo, you knew that he could see through it. The picture was of you and Newt when you were younger, his arm around you as you both smiled at the camera. Thomas was in the photo too, but he was poking out from the back, holding two fingers above yours and Newt's heads, resembling bunny ears.

You hurriedly snatched the picture away from your son as you stood, bringing him up with you. The picture fell to the side.

"Where did you get this?" You almost yelled. Isaac stuttered.

"I-I found it." Before you could say anything more, Minho spoke up. They had all seen the photo.

"Well, Newt. Looks like your a shuck father." You snapped your head to Newt, who was currently clutching the picture, eyes wide as he studied it.

"I think he knows that, Minho." Thomas said as he walked over to you.

"Isaac, go upstairs."

"But-"

"Go upstairs!" You accidentally yelled. You quickly added a quiet please after you saw his face. He was about to cry. After he had rushed up the stairs, you cautiously turned back around. Every one of them were looking from you to Newt.

Thomas patted your shoulder comfortingly as he leaned down to whisper in your ear, "I told you he was going to find out at some point." He wasn't as quiet as needed to be.

"What? You knew?" Minho said in place of Newt, seeing as his jaw was on the floor, putting everything together.

"Uh, well I-, uh... yeah. I put the pieces together."

"So, that's what you two shanks were talking about." After a few seconds, Thomas awkwardly cleared his throat.

"Let's uh... let these two talk. Alone." A few mumbled in agreement, making their way outside onto your porch.

"Why didn't you say anything?" He asked quietly after about a minute, which felt like an hour, of agonizing silence.

"What was I supposed to say? "Hey, I know that you have a lot on your plate and you don't remember me in the slightest but we have a son together?"

"No... I guess not."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for you to find out about him like this. Actually, I didn't really mean for you to find out at all." His head lifted so that he could look into your eyes. He nodded to the empty space on the floor in front of him. After having a seat, he spoke.

"You weren't going to tell me that I had a son?"

"No, because it wouldn't have mattered." His eyebrows furrowed.

"What? Why not? Because it seems to me that it matters quite a lot."

"I mean... that it wouldn't have mattered anyway. You lost your memory, Newt. Memories of me...of us. Of everything. It's not like we could've become a family... Who would stay with someone that they didn't know? Besides, you're leaving anyway.

"What?"

"The Right Arm? That's what your searching for right? If I would've told you, or Isaac for that matter, that you were his father... He's only two. He never knew you... He only has the stories that I tell him. To see you, his daddy, right in front of him only to see him leave.... I don't know what that would do to him. I didn't really want him to find out either." For possibly the third time that day, tears gathered in your eyes. You willed yourself not to cry, especially in front of Newt, but it couldn't be helped. Tears cascaded down your face.

"Did I know? About him? Did you tell me before I was sent up into the Maze?" You shook your head sadly.

"No... I wasn't able to. The day I had finally worked up the courage to tell you, I saw you in that stupid tube, almost drowning in the stuff that filled it. We never even got to say goodbye..."

"I'm sorry." He muttered after a moment of silence. You let out a small, dry laugh.

"Don't be. It's not your fault. It's mine. I shouldn't be telling you this." You went to get up, until his hand shot out and grasped you. You let out a small noise, looking at his hand on your wrist. He immediately retracted it, standing up as well.

"C.... Can I see him?" You were hesitant. You knew what this would lead to. It would lead to Isaac getting so excited to finally get to meet his father in person, only to see him leave again. It would break him. On the other hand, he needs to meet his father. At least he would be able to say that he actually met him. After heavy considering, you slowly nodded, making your way over to the staircase. After climbing it, you walk over your son's door. Knocking slightly, you call out his name. Once the door opened, revealing him all teary-eyed, probably because you yelled at him, you knelt down to his level.

"Hey sweetheart. Mommy's sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you. I was just put under a lot of stress. You see... Mommy hasn't seen daddy in a very long time and he didn't know about you quite yet. I was just caught off guard. Do you forgive me?" He sniffled and nodded.

"Good. Now give mommy a hug." He reached out with tiny arms, wrapping them around your neck. You took this opportunity to reach over and tickle him, making him burst into a fit of giggles. You hoisted him up and continued tickling him while he rested on your hip.

"Mommy! Stop it!" You smiled as he continued to giggle until you stopped tickling him. Once he came down from the fit, you asked him in a serious tone.

"Isaac... do you want to meet your daddy?" He nodded in excitement. A small smile found its way onto your face.

"Okay." Carrying him down the stairs, you began to 'prep' him.

"Okay, sweetheart. Daddy doesn't remember us. That means that he doesn't know of any of those stories that I told you, okay?"

"Why doesn't daddy remember, mommy? D-Does he not wuv us?" Oh boy.

"No, no, no. You see, his memories, the things that let you remember adventures and stories, were taken from him. It wasn't his fault. Your daddy loved me very much and had he met you, he would've loved you just the same. He would've loved you with all of his heart, I just know it." Isaac was very smart for his age, having you to teach him since there weren't exactly schools he could go to. Yours and Newt's intelligence mixed together to create his, which was exceptional. He understood things that no two year old should understand. Sadly, that's how times were now.

You didn't realize that you had stopped at the bottom of the steps until you actually looked. Taking in a deep breath, you let Isaac down before taking his small hand into yours. You knew that they had practically met only ten minutes prior but that was just as play buddies. This time it was different. This time... it was as father and son.

"Don't cry, mommy." You didn't realize that you were until his tiny voice spoke of it. He tugged on your hand, silently asking for you to bend to his level. Once you were, he brought his tiny hand up to your cheek and wiped away the tears.

"It's okay, mommy. You can do it. I'm here with you." You laugh through the tears, placing a kiss on his cheek.

"Thank you, baby. I don't know what I would do without you." Standing up, you take in one more breath. As if knowing what you needed, Isaac walked in front of you, hand in hand, and led you into the room where Newt was waiting. He was sat on the couch, his back towards the entryway. Isaac led you once more over to stand in front of Newt. Newt's gaze almost immediately snapped to yours before falling down to the little boy. Isaac lifted his free hand out for Newt to shake.

"Hi. My names Isaac." He knew that they had met before, but he wanted to do it properly, just like you had.

"Hi Isaac. My name's Newt."

"Can I call you something else?" He asked quietly, looking from Newt to you, and then back again.

"Well, like what?"

"Daddy." Newt looked up at you, almost as if asking for permission to allow his son to call him daddy. You sent him a small smile in return. He looked back down at the child. You knew that Newt must've thought it was pretty awkward to have a child that he just met call him daddy. Yet, he went along with it.

"Sure." Isaac couldn't control himself any longer and he threw himself into Newt's arms, giggling. At first, Newt tensed up but after a second or two, he hesitantly brought his arms around him, returning the hug. You nearly cried at the sight.

Over the next half hour, all three of you just sat there, talking. Catching up. Isaac had practically begged you to tell them about his favorite story. The story of how you and Newt had met. At first you were hesitant, but you eventually complied. The little meeting had went better than you expected. It made you happy, it made Isaac happy. Even Newt seemed pretty content, even though you knew it had to still be a little awkward, hearing stories of him that he doesn't even remember. Everything almost seemed normal, until Thomas burst into the room, cutting off the story about the time that everyone in the facility was going berserk because you and Newt decided to pull a prank on some of the guards. It was actually pretty funny. It took about a week for the guards to get there body skin back to its normal color.

"I'm sorry to interrupt guys, but Newt, if we want to get to the mountains before dark we need to leave now."

"What? Daddy's leaving?" Isaac's lip trembled as he looked from you to Newt. You closed your eyes, knowing that this would happen.

"Why? Please don't leave." You looked to Thomas, trying to come up with an excuse. He just shrugged sadly.

"Isaac, honey, daddy's got to." You looked to Newt, only to see sadness in his eyes as he looked down at the son that he didn't know he had.

"He's got to go fight the bad people. The people who separated us. The people who kept him from you. He's going to fight them and then he's going to come back. Right, Newt?" You knew that it was highly improbable that Newt would come back, but your son shouldn't know. At least not right now. You looked up to Newt, pleading with your eyes for him to play along.

"Y-Yeah. Yeah, I'm not leaving forever. But someone's got to defeat the villains."

"Is daddy a hero?" A sad smile etched its way onto your face.

"Yeah, he is."

"Newt." Thomas reminded.

"Yeah, just give me a second." After Thomas nodded and went back outside, all three of you got up from the couch. Making your way outside, you saw that the others had already started walking ahead a little, giving you guys the space that you needed. Before Newt could move an inch to leave, though, tiny hands were tugging at his jeans. He turned and knelt down to his level. Isaac threw his small arms around Newt's neck. This time, he immediately returned the hug. Once it was over, he stood back up and looked over at you. You stood next to the door, arms wrapped around yourself, looking at the scene unfolding in front of you. You were trying to capture the moment in your mind, so that you could look back on it and remember every single detail. Before Newt knew what he was doing, he walked over to you and pulled you into a hug. You were surprised, but you hugged back nonetheless.

"Thank you." He whispered.

"For what?"

"For introducing me to my son. I may not remember you, and I'm so sorry for that, but I can't help but fall in love with him. Knowing that he is mine just does something to me I guess."

"Your welcome. Thank you for being so understanding. I can't imagine how hard it must've been for you."

"I'm sorry that I have to leave."

"It's not your fault." As much as you didn't want to, you retracted away from the hug.

"Go. The rest are waiting." Newt walked down the small porch steps and onto the scorched ground.

"I'm sorry." He said once again, turning back to face you. You sent him a sad smile, bringing Isaac in front of you. He was sniffling, trying to walk forward to stop his daddy. You had to hold him back, placing your hands on his shoulders. Newt began walking forward, back to the others. But before you and Isaac were completely out of sight, he turned back once more. He saw you wipe something, probably a tear, off of your cheek as you said something to your son. The words were inaudible because he was so far away. His heart ached. He had been telling the truth. In that short thirty-minute period spent with his son, he had fell in love with him. It was strange, but it was true. He felt his head start to ache, as if something was trying to push its way through. He tried shaking it to make it go away, except that it made it worse. Then a wave of memories crashed over him. Memories of before the Maze. Memories of you and him. It wasn't everything, but it was enough for him. He remembered how you two were such trouble makers. He remembered the love that he had felt for you. It was strong. It was strange to say that he still loved you just as much, considering he couldn't remember you for almost three years, but it was true. Him regaining his memories brought the feeling back, solely because he could remember you.

"Guys, wait..."

*******

After you closed the door, you put Isaac to bed for his afternoon nap. All of that crying that he did tired him out so he was fast asleep, dry tears leaving stains on his cheeks.

After you trudged back downstairs and made your way to living room, the tears that you had been holding back crashed over you. Sobs racked your body and you had collapsed onto couch, face in your hands as you cried your heart out. This was the second time that you had lost him. All because of damn WICKED. Your sobs were hard and loud, so you were barley able to make out the knocks coming from your front door. Thinking that it was Jorge once again, you pulled the door open. Your eyes were closed to try and hide the fact that you had been crying.

"Jorge, I'm really not in the mood to-" you cut off your sentence, the feeling of being crushed into a hug surprising you. Opening your eyes, you caught a glimpse of blonde hair.

"N-Newt? Wha-What are you..." he pulled back from the hug, keeping his hands on your shoulders. His face contorted into a smile as he spoke in a low, soft voice.

"I remember." This felt like a blow to your chest, only it was the good kind.

"What?" A smile making its way onto your face as well.

"I remember you. I remember us." That was all it took for you to him into another hug, only this one much more desperate. Tears cascaded down your cheeks.

"H-How?! I don't understand."

"Neither do I but I don't care. I don't remember everything but I remember how much I loved you. How much I love you." The words you had been longing to hear ever since he was taken.

"I love you, too. I always will." You cries, clutching him even harder, almost feeling to see if he was actually real instead of an apparition, getting ready to disappear.

Newt removed his head from the crook of your neck and brought you into a bruising kiss. It was filled happiness and sadness, desperation and relief. Once you both pulled away, lungs screaming for air, a bright smile filled his features once again.

"I have a son." The realization hit him like a ton bricks. Of course he knew, but this feeling was different. It was different because he had regained his memories.

"Yes, you do." Your smile matches his, before it faded away.

"What is it?" You looked towards the mountains.

"The others are probably missing you."

"The others are gone." You snapped you head in his direction, eyebrows furrowed.

"What?"

"I told them that I regained my memories and that I couldn't leave you, or Isaac. Not again."

"So does that mean...?"

"Yeah. I'm staying here. With you." A grin broke out onto your face as you leaped onto him, wrapping your legs around his midsection and your arms around his neck. It was a common thing that you had done before. It was just something that you did when you became extremely happy.

"I love you so much, (Y/N). I'm sorry I forgot that."

"No, no. Don't be sorry. None of this is your fault. I'm just glad that you're here.... with me. Isaac is going to be in for a surprise when he wakes up." You clambered off of Newt, grabbed his hand, and dragged him inside.

As the years went by, you, Newt, and Isaac finally became the family you wanted. Isaac has his father and you had your boyfriend, who had proposed to you after a year and a half went by. It's cliché to say that it ended with a happily ever after but it did. Isaac was happy, Newt was happy, and you were happy. Everyone was happy. Like it should be.

FOREVER TAGS:

@trustnobodyshootfirst, @16wiishes, @missmalfoy1703

Masterlist

[wolf-in-the-stars]

PROMPT: “My kid followed you out of the store because you’re wearing the same coat as me and they got confused” AU

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

I know, I know, I promised this week’s (months) ago but I’m literal trash and have so busy but I hope you guys like it!! tw: abusive past relationship.

- Remus couldn’t stop smiling all day.

- Sirius had texted him first thing that morning, then continued throughout the day.

- It started off with Sirius wishing him a good morning and talking about last night.

- Then they started flirting, talking about what their first date would be like and how Sirius would definitely woo Remus with all the chocolates.

- Then they started sending silly joking messages that made Remus let out a breathy laugh each time.

- He could feel his stomach fluttering and his cheeks heat up everytime his phone buzzed in his pocket.

- Dora kept poking fun at him, but kind heartily.

- She was over the moon that Remus finally seemed to let someone into his life.

- He had a rough past when it came to relationships.

- He’d only ever been in one real relationship, and that ended badly.

- To be honest, the whole relationship was bad.

- Dora despised that man that Remus used to be with when they were 16.

- The way he used to treat Remus disgusted her.

- Fen was older than Remus by at least 5 years.

- At the beginning, Remus felt special that an older man wanted him.

- That was until 5 months into the relationship when the abuse started.

- It was a long three years when Remus was with Fenir Greyback.

- He tried to leave, but he couldn’t. 

- Fen had a hold over him that frightened everyone.

- Since the end of that relationship, he decided to never to get involved in another one.

- And that was over ten years ago.

- He had the odd fling now and then, but nothing note worthy.

- But since having Teddy, the flings had stopped.

- This Sirius person, however, seemed to be wonderful and really captured Remus’ affection.

- And for that, Dora will always be grateful to them.

- Teddy was sat on a cushion on the floor in the living room playing Batman Lego and chatting out loud to anyone that would listen.

- He couldn’t stop talking about how fantastic last night was playing with Harry and Padfoot and kept mithering about when they could go visit again.

- Sirius texted and asked Remus the exact same question.

- Remus was sat in the armchair watching Teddy play his game and holding his phone to his chest, awaiting the next reply.

- Dora walked into the room holding a brew for each of them.

- She placed Remus’ down on the table next to him and earned a “thanks love” in reply, though he didn’t look away from the TV screen.

- “Go out with them tonight, Remus.” She pushed.

- Remus looked up with a start.

- “Don’t you think it’s too soon though? I mean, we only met yesterday …” Remus fretted whilst picking at the edges of his phone case.

- “Does it feel like it’s too soon Remus? Honestly?” Dora placed her open palm on his shoulder. 

- “I think they really like you, and I think you really like them. You owe it to yourself to at least try.” 

- Remus was silent, but nodded slightly.

- Dora sighed heavily and dropped down into Remus lap.

- “You’re insufferable, Lupin,” she complained. 

- “Yeah, whatever Tonks,” he rolled his eyes and nudged her with his shoulder.

- She chuckled lightly and ran her fingers through his hair as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

- “You’re scared it’s going to be like last time, aren’t you?” She whispered so Teddy couldn’t hear.

- He had finally stopped chatting about Harry and Padfoot and was enthralled in his game.

- Remus bit the inside of his cheek and stared down at his phone.

- “I don’t want to loose myself again, Dora.” He confessed, “I have Teddy, you and Fleur. I don’t want to loose my independence and become solely reliant on them.”  

- He sighed heavily and leant around Dora to pick up his cup of tea and took a small sip.

- “Fen was nice at first, too.”

- “I know, love. But I think Sirius will be different. They already sound amazing.”

- They fell silent watching their son who was oblivious to the melancholy mood that had fallen over the room.

- The front door suddenly opened with a call of hellos.

- Teddy gasped and jumped up in cheer and ran towards the hallway.

- “It’s maman!” he chanted. 

- “Salut la famille!” Fleur smiled as she walked into the living room, Teddy attached to her hand, looking up to her in awe.

- When she saw Remus and Dora cuddled up on the arm chair, she threw her hand to her mouth with a comical gasp.

- “Unhand my femme, Monsieur Lupin!” She playfully scowled and pointed at him.

- “Never!” He wrapped his arms around Dora’s waist to keep her from moving who jokingly squirmed in his grasp to reach her wife.

- “Teddy! The terrible Pirate Monsieur Lupin has taken me hostage!” 

- Fleur fake gasped and bent down to Teddy’s level.

- “Theodore, whatever shall we do to recuse the fair maiden?!”  

- “I’ll save her, Maman! For Mummy!” He howled his battle cry and ran towards his Daddy.

- Remus chuckled and held his hands up in mock surrender.

- Dora quickly jumped up and over to Fleur and planted a sound kiss onto her lips.

- Teddy screamed with laughter and dived onto his Daddy, tickling his small fingers under his arms. 

- “Argh, ye got me, ye got me! I handed da booty!” He chuckled like a pirate, tickling Teddy’s sides in retaliation earning childish squeals in return.

- “How was your trip, love?” Remus smiled whilst manoeuvring Teddy into his side for a cuddle.

- Dora pulled Fleur over to the sofa on the wall near the chair and wrapped herself around her.

- “It went well,” she smiled, settling herself against Dora’s shoulder, “anything exciting happen whilst I was away?”

- Remus blushed slightly whilst Dora beamed.

- “I made new friends, maman!” Teddy pushed out his chest with pride.

- “And also ran away from Daddy whilst at the supermarket, didn’t you mister?” Remus furrowed his eyebrows with a mischievous smirk.

- Teddy bit his lip with a shame face.

- “Teddy.” Fleur scolded.

- “But, that’s how I met Harry and Padfoot, Maman!” He whined.

- “Ooh, Harry and Padfoot? Is that your friends dog?” She smiled with genuine interest.

- Remus barked with laughter whilst Dora giggled into Fleur’s neck. 

- Fleur furrowed her perfect brows with confusion.

- “No,” Teddy said as-a-matter-of-factly, “Padfoot is Harrys God-Daddy! He’s is Daddy best friend and his Papa’s brother, Harry told me!”

- “Yeah, and Remus and Teddy went over for a play DATE yesterday, didn’t you?” She winked at Fleur, hoping she’d pick up on her meaning.

- Which of course she did if her bright smile aimed at Remus was anything to go by.

- Remus blushed even harder than before and sunk a little lower in the chair, jolting Teddy on the way.

- “Yeah, and it was soooo much fun! Daddy made hotpot!” Teddy patted Remus on the head in a loving gesture. 

- “Oh, hotpot,” She groaned, “what I wouldn’t do for some of your famous hotpot, Remus. I haven’t eat properly all day!” 

- “There’s some left in the fridge that I can warm up for you, Fleur,” he smiled, standing to his feet whilst picking Teddy up and putting him down in between his Mum’s. 

- He quickly placed a kiss to Fleur’s cheek and walked in to the kitchen.

- “I saw Daddy and Padfoot nearly kiss yesterday, maman!” Teddy whispered when his Dad left the room.

- “Really?” She cooed, her eyes shifting to Dora’s. “Do we approve?”

- Dora shrugged, cuddling Teddy tighter to them.

- “I haven’t met them yet, but they sound lovely. Remus looks positivity smitten today, and Teddy likes them, don’t you?”

- “Yeah, they’re cool.” Which was high praise from him.

- “Their name is actually Sirius, apparently Padfoot is a nickname but, yeah. They sound like they really like Remus, keeps asking to go on a date with him.”

- She heavily sighed and picked at a pick of fluff stuck in Teddy’s hair.

- “But you know what your Daddy’s like, don’t you pal?”

- Teddy nodded. 

- “But I think he should date them. I don’t like him being lonely.” 

- Fleur’s face fell. 

- “Your Daddy isn’t lonely, bébé. He has you! And us.” She caressed his cheek.

- Teddy sighed dramatically, leaning into her palm.

- “I knows, but what about when we go back to our house? Daddy’s on his own thens. He must get a little sad.”

- Dora lifted up her head at that. She hadn’t thought about that before.

- “Well, why don’t we go and set a little date up for Daddy with Padfoot then, hey?” She winked with mischief. “It’s got to be a secret okay? Can’t tell Daddy. It’s a surprise!” 

- “Yeah!” He cheered loudly, then slapped his little hand to his mouth.

- “Yeah” he whispered again, earning a giggle from his mum’s.

- “Come on then you. Let’s go see Sirius. Fleur-”

- “I know, I know, I’m distraction.” She winked, kissing both of their cheeks and walking into the kitchen after Remus.

- Dora gave herself a second to stare lovingly after her beautiful wife, before jumping off the sofa with Teddy in hand.

- They quietly snuck out of the front door and ran over to Sirius’ house next door, both of them tripping up over the step to knock on the door.

- The door open slightly where a person with a furrow eyebrow stood.

- “Oh hello again Teddy, you must be his mum.” They said, flinging their door open wider with a larger smile.

- “Wotcher Sirius!” Dora beamed, “It’s nice to meet you, I’m Tonks. Remus and Teddy haven’t stopped talking about you all day.” 

- Sirius blushed prettily and ran their hand through the back of their hair.

- “O-oh, really? I hope they said only good things,” they bit their lip with a smirk. “Please, come in.“

- “Of course,” she winked and stepped over the threshold. “You’ve a lovely home.” 

- “Thanks.” He smiled brightly.

- “Anyway, I’m here to ask if you have any plans for the evening? Remus would love to go on a date with you, but he’s a little shy, bless him.”

- “Oh,” Sirius sighed a little, “are you sure it’s just being shy, and not the fact he just doesn’t … you know, want to? Go out with me, I mean?” They shifted a little awkwardly.

- “Definitely not!” Dora rushed. 

- With a quick look down to Teddy, she turned back to Sirius to whisper.

- “It’s not my place to say, but Remus hasn’t had good … experience when it comes to relationships or anything.”

- Sirius nodded and listened intently to her.

- “Do you think he would want to try? With me?” They seemed uncertain.

- “I think if he were ever to try, it would be with you.” She beamed. “He’s smitten for you.”

- “Yeah! His face keeps going all red when you text, like this,” Teddy rubbed his hands on his cheeks very fast so when he pulled away, they were red raw.

- Sirius chuckled.

- “Is that so? Well then, in that case.” They winked.

- “Brilliant! Say 7pm pop over to pick him up? I’ll make sure he’s ready. He likes Indian food.” Dora smiled.

- “I’ll be there. Thank you, Tonks.” 

- “Just make sure you treat my baby Daddy right, okay? I know where you live” She grinned.

- “I promise.” 

- Dora walked towards the front door, Teddy holding her hand again.

- She stopped with a jolt and turned back.

- “Wait a minute, Sirius … Sirius …” She mumbled to herself. “Is your last name Black?” Her eyebrows furrowed.

- “Erm … yes?”

- “Holy shit.” Her eyes widened.

- “Mummy! That’s a bad word!” Teddy scolded.

- “What?” She confusingly turned away from Sirius to her son, then back again, “Oh, yes, sorry, sorry Teddy you’re right, I meant shoot.”  

- Sirius sighed heavily with a dejected look.

- “I guess you just realised who I am and want me to stay away from Remus, right?"

- "No, it's just-"

-"It's okay. I get it. Its because I’m the elusive ex-heir of the Ancient and -”

- “-Nobel house of Black.” Dora unconsciously finished. “Yeah … this is going to sound crazy but … we’re cousins.”

- “What?” Sirius and Teddy both said in unison.

- “I’m Andromeda’s daughter.” 

- Sirius’ eyes grew twice their size.

- “Nymphadora?”

Tiny cliffhangerrrrrr, I hope you liked it! Sorry it took so long, don’t hate me

[fat-femshep]

You're welcome! If you've played Andromeda, would you be up for a Female Shepard/Liara/Vetra/Female Ryder with all of them taking Twelve Body Expansion Part potions, expanding their faces twelve times with fat, 7 Short Potions, and 25 Weight Gain and 2 Immobile potions each?

(Ooh they're going to get big here! Vetra's role changed to supporter/helper)Vetra brought in several boxes of potions delivered by one of her contacts. "Hey everybody, look what I've got! A lot of new potions for you to try out, including body growth, shortness, weight gain and immobility" The Turian explained and got them out for each of her lovers. Jennifer Shepard, Liara T'Soni and Sara Ryder all watched excitedly as Vetra dished out the potions to everyone, everyone had the same amount of each potion including 12 facial fat expansion potions, 6 short potions, 25 weight gain potions and 2 immobile potions each. Vetra had a separate box labelled for her containing muscle potions with a note saying 'To help with the aftermath' on it."Wow, this guy sure likes sending up potions!" Sara chuckled and looked over the massive array of bottles in front of her. Jennifer seemed less daunted as she'd been sent many potions before. "Don't worry, you'll get used to it" Jennifer chuckled with Liara, both of whom had had numerous different options sent to them by this guy, and they always enjoyed it. Jennifer was the first to open her bottles, she mixed everything together into one potion, which she'd pound the easiest way to drink so many at one, it bubbles a lot before finally settling down and giving off a pleasant smell as well, much to her surprise. Everyone else followed suit and soon the potions were ready to drink. "Cheers everyone, down the hatch!" Jennifer said with a chuckle and started to chug her potion, which took several moments due to its volume, but she finished first out of everyone and let out a loud belch. "Surprisingly tasty!" Jennifer remarked. The effects then took hold as Jennifer began to shrink firstly, then after a few moments her face began to accumulate a huge amount of fat, her cheeks bloating out and sagging as well as her neck forming many rolls and double chins, eventually her neck and head merged into one roll covered fatty blob. The rest of her body was also following suit as she shrank down continually, her boobs sagged down as she grew massively, her belly was already developing a third roll and her butt exploded out of her panties as she rapidly started filling her space up; if she hadn't been shrinking, she'd have taken up at least half of the room by now! Her shrinking eventually stopped when she reached the size of a large teddy bear, but her weight gain didn't! The former commander just kept growing and growing, her girth spreading across the floor and touching the still normal sized Liara next to her as 9500lbs was accumulating itself on her body. When she eventually stopped, she was a literal mini sea of fat that could barely be distinguished as a person anymore. She couldn't speak because her face was so weighed down by her fat, but she didn't care, this felt amazing!"By the Goddess!" Liara exclaimed and leaned down to hug her gigantic mini lover, she tried picking her up, but that much weight in such a small density made it impossible for the Asari to even budge her a little bit, even with biotics! She looked at her potion and eagerly downed it, wanting to join her lover in her immobility. The effects took hold in the same manner as Shepard's had done, first came the shrinking down to around the same size as her lover while slowly gaining, although with Liara, most of the weight went to her lower half, resulting in an insanely disproportionate pear shaped figure. Her butt spread out like a tidal wave of fat across the floor and her thighs developed so many rolls that they swallowed up her feet. Compared to Shepard, who was an overall fat and totally immobile blob, she was a titanic butt and thighs with a comparatively chubby upper body, still able to move her arms and talk. "This is amazing!!!" She moaned loudly and grabbed her mounds of butt flab. She reach over to rub Shepard's, well she guessed it was her belly, it was so hard to tell what was what on the blob. She heard a muffled moan come from her lover as she played with her fat and Liara chuckled. Her own face was covered in flab and chins,but nowhere near as fat as Shepard, who must have grown at least ten flabby chins compared to Liara's modest four chins, perhaps some of the potions meant for her face had transferred to her butt?Last but not least was Sara, who looked down a little nervously at her bottle. Vetra smiled at her lover and sat next to her. "Tell you what, let me hold you while you change" She suggested and quickly drank her five muscle potions. Her whole body seemed to grow in height even more and her arms and legs became noticeably broader and more prominent. Vetra felt stronger than ten Krogan, which she hoped would be enough to hold Ryder if she was going to get as big as the others. She gently lifts the potion to Ryder's lips and pours it out just as gently so she isn't uncomfortable with it. When it was all gone she kissed Ryder held on to her tightly for support. The effect did take effect, but seemed to be in the opposite order to the others. The weight gain was coming first! Sara's top ripped open within a matter of moments as her belly surged outwards like a tidal wave of flab, covering her thickening thighs and spilling over them in what felt like an instant. Her butt was next to start growing as it forced its way from her trousers and her panties disappeared into her butt crack and it grew and swallowed Vetra's legs under it, so she moved around to Sara's belly and hugged her as it grew. As Sara filled the room, Vetra had to move the others away or they'd be overwhelmed by Sara's growing fat, placing them nearer the door and watching as Sara filled up most of the room, her 9500lb pound body looked so inviting, her belly was the biggest part of her, which Vetra loved! Now the shrinking came and the rest of the room slowly began to be revealed once more as the behemoth Ryder shrank down to a slightly smaller size than her friends were. Vetra walked over and picked her up with ease and cuddled the massive belly heavy blob. "Aww, look at you! Such a cute little ball of fat" Vetra cooed and kissed her belly. "This should be fun, I'll enjoy pampering all of you and making you even bigger. Hopefully we'll get even more potions soon, I want you to fill my old warehouse with your flab" She teased and carried them all back to Ryder's room...(Thanks for another great ask @johan25)

[theunexpectedhappened]

Chapter Ninety-three

First of all a Happy new year to all you guys and that the year may bring all that you wish for. 

We drove into the underground airport as we arrived at my old apartment. “you want to take Nathan with us or not?” Harry asked, looking at me as we rode up the elevator. “I guess we could.” I shrugged my shoulders. “You want to take him with us?” I asked, turning my head at him. “Wil we be able to keep him here that is the question?” Harry chuckled.

 “fair question.” I chuckled. “I can drive one of the two cars.” I nodded my head. I unlocked the door and walked in to  a full house, even Mark, Rina and his kids were here, I guessed they were more here than at their own place.

 “What’s this? Full house?” I asked, it was already 5.30 the lunch at tea of our engagement having run out and me having arrived late wanted to stay a bit longer out of respect. “you could say that?” Daphne chuckled, swinging a pot around and putting it on the table, shaking my head in amusement at the scene. “Autie Liv, Uncle Harry;” Charlotte yelled from behind us. “hey sweetie.” Harry said, picking her up and throwing her in the air a couple of times.

 “is George okay?” she asked, looking between me and Harry. “yea, we’re going to go and visit him.” Harry told her. “how is he?” Pippa asked. “didn’t Kate call you?” I chuckled. “yea, she said he’d just gotten to the room and he was sleeping.” Pippa explained, looking at me. “He’s still doing the same. Kate said on the phone over here.” I told her, walking to the fridge and pulling out a water bottle. “Harry?” I asked, sticking my head around the door of the fridge. “yea.” He smiled.

 “so how was the Irish guards?” Mia asked. “good, had a lot of fun actually.” I chuckled. “you guys want to eat something?” Danny asked. “I think Joseph is making dinner for us.” I explained, with a yawn.

 “tired?” Jens asked. “yea, it was an unexpected early morning and it hasn’t slowed down yet.” I explained. “Will you be taking over Kate’s engagement tomorrow?” Liz asked me. “I don’t know. If she wants me to, I will.” I told her.

 “Miguel isn’t really happy you send Will back to St. Mary’s and you did the lunch and greeting alone.” She smirked at me. “he knows where to find me.” I shrugged my shoulders, to which everyone laughed. “what?” I chuckled.

 “don’t you know her by now?” Harry pointed out. “we do.” Everyone agreed. “where’s Nathan?” I asked. “up playing with Cameron, but he’s been asking about George since he got of school.” Glen pointed out. “thanks for today.” I smiled at Mia, glen, Danny and Jens. I knew they had picked up Nathan from school and had watched Charlotte, she only started school in September.  

 “don’t mention it.” Danny smiled. “we had a lot of fun, didn’t we?” he high fived Charlotte in Harry’s arms. “so do you want to take him with us?” Harry asked. “I don’t know, if he’s playing upstairs. It’s not like George will be awake yet. I could always take to see him tomorrow.” I concluded.

 “I’ll go and ask him.” I said, pushing myself from leaning against the couch and walking to the hall. “ooh and liz. Did you give them the tickets to the horseshow in May?” I asked, stopping in the doorway. “no, we haven’t got them.” she said. “Gabby said, they were given to you and Rebecca.” I told her. “I’ll check my office tomorrow.” She said, as I walked out, hearing the questions about them. we’d arranged that all of our friends and family would be able to attend the horse show in Windsor in May, it would be super special in commemoration of the platinum jubilee. A preview of the real concert to come in June.

 They would be sitting in the box next to the Royals. I explained to Nathan that George would still be asleep but he would have none of it and wanted to come. So I came back down him trailing behind me.

 “he wants to see George.” I pointed out. “so why didn’t you tell us about the surprise?” Mia chuckled. “because it was a surprise.” I laughed, looking at Harry. “I got the same.” He chuckled, holding his free hand up. “be happy you’re invited;” I teased.

 “oh believe me we are, we just figured after the tickets were sold out.” Daphne assumed. “well, it’s our thanks for being there for me and for us during the last year.” I explained, smiling at each and every one of them. “but the concert and the gala this in June?” Rine objected. “that wasn’t us.” I chuckled, looking at Harry. “what do you mean?” Mark asked, looking at us questioningly. “who did the invitation come from?” Harry chuckled, looking at me.

 “The Lord Chamberlain, but we assumed it was you guys.” Jens commented. “no, it was gran who asked if we’d like to have our friends there.” Harry explained. “so we are invited by The Queen.” Mia asked, her eyes bulging. “yea, she wouldn’t have given the invitation, if she didn’t want you there, she needed to agree for the horse show as well.” I commented.

 “but that was our request, Kate, Will, Liv and mine’s. June was all Gran.” Harry laughed. “what are we supposed to wear?” Rina asked. “didn’t the invitation say?” I asked, normally the dress code was always mentioned on the invitations.

 “Black Tie.” Mia noted. “what would that mean?” I chuckled. “Evening gowns and tux.” Jens groaned, making Harry and me laugh. “be happy she isn’t making you wear a tux to the horseshow.” Harry threatened. “for once I don’t have to ‘dress up’” I teased. “yea, yea.” He protested. “I swear, sometimes gran does that to torture us.” Harry pointed out.

 “what will you be wearing?” Daphne asked, I was surprised Liz hadn’t been questioned yet like this, she knew the procedures as well. “who?” I asked, “the royals?” Jens pointed out. “oh, we are pulling out all the stuff.” Harry chuckled. “which means?” Glen chuckled. “Tiara’s, sashes, orders, the whole shebang. We are sitting on a side table, but there will be a table in the other direction where all the attending royals will be sitting, nearly every country will be represented by a president or Royal.” Liz explained.

 And by now nearly of their mouths were hanging on the ground to our amusements. “Welcome to our life;” Harry and I teased.

 “guess we’ll get a taste of what your life now is be like.” Jens concluded. “you will.” Harry and I agreed. We stayed for a bit longer talking and catching up, before we headed to the hospital. I drove the car towards St. Mary. “do we take the back entrance or the front?” I asked when we neared the hospital. “Jim said to ride to the gate at the front.” Harry looked at me, rubbing his thumb on the back of my hand.

 The police stationed at the entrance let us through the flashes of the camera lighting up the darkened streets. “come on bud.” I said, opening the back door as Harry did the same on the other side, taking Charlotte in his arms.

 Making sure I had the bear the Irish Guards had given me I closed the door and locked the door. We smiled at the people we passed on our way up. “hey Christophe, Luc.” I smiled at their RPO’s waiting by the door on a chair.

 Liam and Jim would be taking over so they could go down for a sec and get some fresh air as we headed inside to see a very looking Kate and Will sitting on the couch by the window looking at George’s bed. “hey guys.” I said, sticking my head around the corner.

 “hey.” They smiled, as we headed into the room. “Mummy, Daddy.” Charlotte said, getting restless in Harry’s arms so he put her on the ground with a chuckle. Nathan first gave Will and Kate a kiss before checking on his best friend.

 “I promised to give you this.” I chuckled, holding up the teddy bear. “thanks.” Kate smiled. “not only for this, but for today.” She smiled, giving me a hug. “Don’t worry. We’re family now. That’s what we do.” I assured her, rubbing her back in a comforting manner. Before I moved on to Will.

 “thanks, for today. You don’t know how much it means to us.” he whispered as he hugged me. “really it was done with pleasure. I’m here if you need me to fall in for the coming days as well” I assured them. “me too, everything you need, name it.” Harry assured them.

 “Well, we normally have a separate engagement.” Will looked between us two, snuggling Charlotte close to him. “would you guys mind taking over for us?” Kate finished “or stay here with George while we go.” Will suggested.

 I looked over at Harry and we didn’t need words to know each other’s decision we’d do the engagement so they could stay with George. “We’ll go in your place. Just tell us what It’s about,” Harry told them. “thanks.” They smiled.

 So for the half an hour they informed us about their engagements. They asked a hundred times if I were okay to do it by myself, and I was. Kate recorded her speech on video as did Will so they would still be there in some way, supporting their causes.

 We didn’t stay much longer. Danny had really worn out Charlotte with playing, so we headed home with a cranky Charlotte and disappointed Nathan who hadn’t seen George awake.

 We waved as we passed the press and drove in the direction in KP.

 ***  

 “God I’m exhausted” I stated, falling down on the couch, the day finally catching up with me. Charlotte and Nathan had been put to bed. Harry and I had divided the bedtime routine’s; it was like a preview of how our lives would be when we were parents ourselves.

 “you were brilliant today.” Harry whispered, turning his head towards me where it was resting against the backrest. “I just did what I was supposed to do.” I shrugged my shoulders, moving closer towards him. Snuggling into his side.  

 “that doesn’t take away that you were brilliant today. Remarkable even. I can’t say how proud I am of you.” he said, his breath warming my face. “I’m just happy that Kate and will could be with George.” I smiled, leaning up to kiss his lips.

 “you know I have an idea, meet me upstairs in 10 minutes.” Harry announced, jumping up, throwing a smirk over his shoulder as he disappeared in the hallway. ‘what is he up to now’ I thought to myself.

 I followed up after him after ten minutes and entered our bedroom. “Harry?” I yelled when I didn’t see where he was.

  “bathroom” I heard his voice echo from the bathroom. “Harry.” I gasped when I saw what he’d done, the bath was run foam overflowing. Candles are around the room with a flower scent.

 “you deserve it, get undressed and in the bath, I’m going to get something downstairs.” He told me as he walked up to me, kissing my lips as he met me in the doorway. “won’t you join me?” I whispered. “I will in a second.” He smiled, kissing my lips before walking out, with a sigh I walked towards our huge bath and started undressing, feeling the water just before I got in.

 with a moan of contentment, I leant my head back as the hot water eased my body. “don’t fall asleep Merida.” Harry announced his come back with a chuckle. “I’m not, I’m just relaxing.” I replied, lifting my head and opening my eyes.

 “you still want me to join you?” he asked with a chuckle, placing two glasses of wine on the edge of the bath. “yea.” I told him, so he stripped his clothes and got in behind me, running his fingers up and down my leg underneath the water.

 “no matter how tired I am and how things got today, I quite enjoyed myself.” I admitted, feeling bad cause if George hadn’t gotten sick I wouldn’t have handed out the shamrocks and wouldn’t have been left alone to prove myself.

 “why doesn’t that surprise me?” he chuckled. “but honestly I couldn’t be prouder of you, flying solo and doing a damn good job at it. taking charge.” He summed. “I think you sometimes forget that that was my job one day, taking the lead and doing things alone in the meantime as a guide and then I was the CEO of a company. I think I quite know how to handle myself.” I chuckled, leaning to the side so I could look up at him.

 “still, there’s a difference to being a tour guide and doing this. You’re great at this and in a sense it shouldn’t have surprised me.” He chuckled, admitting the fact.  

 “and tomorrow another solo engagement, quite unexpectedly.” He stated. “It is, but I don’t really mind.” I admitted, I won’t be speeching yet, the video message of Kate will be shown.” I noted, not really seeing the problem. “you’ll do great.” He assured me, rubbing his fingers up and down softly against the skin of my arm.

 “would you mind if we went to see gran and gramps this weekend, I’d like to give them their tickets to the horse show themselves and I’d like to see them, I haven’t seen them in two weeks.” I admitted, looking up at Harry.

 “Of course, you don’t need to ask that love.” Harry smiled, kissing my lips. We stayed in the bath for a bit longer, finishing our glasses of wine, the water getting cold as we got out. “I’m just going to check on charlotte and Nathan.” I said, when Harry crawled under the sheets.

 “You want me to join you?” he asked. “no, I’ll be back in a sec.” I told him, blowing him a kiss as I slipped out of the room and to the door opposite of our where Charlotte was sleeping. She was sleeping soundly, her snuggle blanket pulled close to her, the sheets snuggled around and tucked in around her. I walked over to her and kissed the top of her head.

  When I was confident everything was alright, I went to check in Nathan’s room and saw he’d drunk his glass on his night stand so I refilled it in his bathroom and put it back on the nightstand.

 Giving him a kiss on the head I slipped out of his room and got back to my own where Harry was sitting up, waiting for my return. “are they asleep?” Harry asked. “yea, sound asleep.” I smiled, crawling in bed and snuggling in Harry’s side.

 “I love you merida” he said, kissing the top of my head. “I love you to love.” I muttered, half asleep already.

 ***

 it was an early morning for Harry he’d be taking over for Will this morning, I would be doing this afternoon’s engagement. Harry had left me to sleep in, but not long after he’d come to kiss me goodbye our bedroom door opened and in came Nathan followed by Charlotte. “can we get in bed with you?” Nathan asked, holding Charlotte’s hand. “Of course. I smiled, holding the sheets open on either side for them to crawl in bed.

 “Can we go and see George again?” Charlotte asked, looking up at me. “not right now, but tonight uncle Harry and I will take you to see him, maybe auntie Pip and Uncle Jens will come and pick you up to go and see him.” I explained.

 “good.” She snuggled into my side. I think I fell asleep again together with Nathan and Charlotte, cause next thing I knew Nathan was shaking me awake and announced he was hungry. “How about we go and make some breakfast then” I chuckled, sitting up.

 I helped Charlotte get dressed, Nathan capable of doing it himself. But by the time I had gotten quite an unexpected text, I knew we’d talked about meeting in London, both of us living here and having it hit off from the moment we met.

 First I called Kate if it was alright if I took Charlotte out to a breakfast café near the palace to meet up with her, Kate and will didn’t see a problem with it so I told the kids to get there coats while I called the PO’s.

 “where are we going?” Nathan asked, looking up at me. “we’re meeting a friend of mine in the park and then we’re going to go and eat pancakes.” I told them, which seemed to satisfy for now.

 ***

 “hey long time no see?” Madeline chuckled as we met each other in the park. “yea, we’ve been awfully busy and now with George” I explained. “how is the little guy doing?” she asked. “well from what Kate told me, he discovered the buttons to convert his bed.” I chuckled to which she laughed.  

 “No Neil?” I asked. “no, he’s in New York on a business trip and our dinner was well overdue.” She chuckled. “that it was, I’m glad to see you.” I smiled. “Charlotte, Nathan. This is Madeline and Leonore and Nicolas.” I introduced them “Madeline this is my little brother Nathan and Charlotte.” I said.

 “how do you my sister?” Nathan asked. “Nathan.” I scolded. “no it’s fine. Don’t worry. I know curious kids.” Madeline chuckled, nodding her head to her kids at her legs. “I met her when she came to see my sister in Sweden.” Madeline explained. “So you’re a princess as well?” Nathan assumed. “I am.” Madeline chuckled. “but you can call me maddy.” She leaned down, like she was telling him a big secret.  “okay.” He and Charlotte said.

 We ended up going to a small and intimate breakfast café, which to my opinion served one of the best pancakes in London. “so have you heard of my sister?” she asked when the kids food was cut and they were eating and talking away, leaving me and Madeline some time to catch up.

 “yea, we texted only two days ago on Tuesday.” I told her. “I’m looking forward for her to come here.” She smiled. “I can imagine. She’ll be staying at your place that week, before we leave right?” I asked. “yea, she will.” She nodded her head, we ended up talking for nearly two hours, but I had to go back to KP to get ready for Kate’s engagement I was taken over, with a promise to meet for dinner when her husband was back in town we made our way back to KP.

 Liz would be watching the kids until Harry arrived and Lauren quickly helped me. “you sure you want to watch the kids?” I asked, looking at Liz as she walked into my walk-in- wardrobe.

 “yea I’m sure, apparently you already went out on a walk.” She chuckled, sitting down on my vanity table. “yea,  Maddy send me text asking to meet up for breakfast, Kate was okay with it, so we went out.” I told her, getting up and pulling my dress off the hanger and stepping into the dress. “Zip me up?” I asked, turning my back to my sister.

 “it seemed like you had a great time.” She chuckled, doing up my zipper. “what do you mean?” I asked, turning around to face her. “Well some paps caught you.” she pointed out. “great.” I muttered, pulling on my coat and shoes.

 “Don’t worry they didn’t say anything bad.” She told me. “for now.” She added with a snort. “thanks.” I muttered, as I made my way out of the room and down the stairs. “Liam.” I greeted, waiting below the stairs. “Harry should be here in an hour, so you won’t have to watch them for long.” I told her.

 I said goodbye and made my way to the helicopter patch. “how long is the flight?” I asked, greeting the pilots. “about 30 minutes, Ma’am.” they informed me. “thanks.” I smiled. I read the summary Rebecca had send me earlier today.

 When we nearly arrived in Portsmouth I received a call from Harry: “hey how was the engagement?” I asked a smile growing on my face as I heard his voice. “an engagement.” He chuckled. “are you on the way to Portsmouth?” he asked. “yea, we’re nearly there.” I said, looking out the window. “mhm.” He muttered.

 “how was breakfast?” he chuckled. “great, seems like we have another dinner coming up.” I chuckled. “with Princess Madeline?” he asked. “yep and her husband, remember I told you we’d talked about meeting up Sweden.” I reminded him. “I did. Guess we have a lot of dinners coming up.” he chuckled over the phone.

 “we have.” I agreed. “Liz is watching the kids for now, maybe you co”uld do something with them this afternoon and remember to walk Spot and Clover as well.” I told him. “great, I’ll take them with me on the walk.” He told me, as I heard him smile over the line.

 “seems like you’ll be having fun.” I chuckled. “We’re almost there. I’ll call you when I leave again.” I told him. “good, I love you Merida.” He said. “I love you to hun;” I replied, before ending the call.            

 ***

 two minutes later I felt the helicopter descending. I saw the Range Rover waiting on me from the window I was looking through. “Liv.” Liam said, getting my attention as the door to the helicopter opened, Liam got in the front seat after he’d opened my door.

 The ride to where the 1851 trust, Kate’s organisation was, was only a short drive.

 “thanks.” I whispered when Liam opened my door. Walking up to the pair. “Your Royal Highness, it’s an honour to welcome you.” the women said, bowing to me. “the honour is all mine; Catherine sends her apologies for not being able to come.” I told the women and the man after the man had bowed to me as well.

 “We totally understand, if it were my son I’d want to be with him as well.” The woman agreed, motioning her hand for me to go inside. “exactly” I nodded my head. I was shown around the facility for sailing training.

 Took a couple of equipment to use, looked out over the view from the top of the tower, before we headed back downstairs where I’d do the short speech and show the video Kate had recorded last night.

 “ being shown around the facility in the last couple of hours made me see why Catherine is devoted and passionate about this organisation. Catherine of course sends her biggest apologies to the people expecting and wanting to see her, but at the moment she’s at George’s side, where she’s supposed to be as mother and William as a father, but that doesn’t take away she forgot about you.

 in fact last night when I visited the hospital we recorded a short video will be showing.” I finished, looking at the screen behind me where the video started in a hospital room of St. Mary’s you could see the edge of George’s bed and although Will and Harry had tried to keep Nathan and Charlotte quite, you could hear them in the background as Kate send her apologies and told the people in the room why she was so committed to this organisation.

 When the video finished in continued. “So I hope that being here hasn’t disappointed any people that hoped to see Catherine. I’d like to give the people who worked on the facility big congratulations on the work and commitment that went into creating this facility.

 I hope my short training upstairs prepared me a little for the big work now.” I ended with a chuckle as I stepped down the small stage as I unveiled the plaque with Kate’s title and official name together with sailing legend Ben Ainslee.

 We posed for a picture with the crew of the facility before I was led to a room where I could change to and sail with the team of Ben Ainslee.

I changed into the plastic pants and jacket above my leggings and sweater, pulled on my running shoes and moved outside, where the team was waiting on me. “have you ever sailed ma’am?” Ben asked. “No, I’ve done my fair share of water sports, but sailing is sadly one thing I haven’t been able to do, it’s on my bucket list and it seems I’ll be ticking that box of.” I finished with a laugh.

 “it seems like that.” He agreed with a laugh as we made our way to the boat. “May I say that you did a very good job in Australia with the Iron man competition” he pointed out, looking back at me. “you may.” I chuckled. “I really enjoyed myself that day.” I stared head a bit thinking back of it, thinking of our tour, that felt had been months ago, it only ended last month.

 They helped me on the boat and explained to me the workings of the boat and instructed me what I could do and then we set sail for the oceans, for one thing I was happy, it was an easy sea so I meant we were bouncing to much, not that I wouldn’t have liked it, but the water wasn’t to warm yet so, I’d rather have stayed dry.

 I helped adjust the ropes, before sitting back down on the seats and enjoyed the thrill of being at the mercy of the wind and currents, the wind blowing in my face and it was times like these that I really enjoyed, sometimes being a Duchess meant you could do things, no one would get a chance to do, and I enjoyed that the most, but secondly I enjoyed the freedom that came with it. I had no PO’s with me, don’t get me wrong I liked them a lot, gotten quite close to them, but it was nice to not be followed for once and just enjoy doing this.

 When we got back to shore I was hyped up from the feeling the sail had given me, stepping of the boat with an extra bounce in my step. We walked back to the room with the changing rooms, pulling of the protective plastic pants and jacket. Keeping the legging and sweater on as I walked into the room to say goodbye to everyone.

 They had also presented me with a small gift for George which I accepted gladly. Not long after I got back in the Range Rover and towards the helicopter. If I was lucky I would be in London in 45 minutes, around 5, 5.15 which meant we could have dinner and go with Charlotte and Nathan to the hospital.

 ***

 an hour later I arrived on the helicopter patch in KP, thanked Liam and send him off, Aidan would be joining us to the hospital later in the evening. “Harry?” I yelled walking into the house. “Living room.” Harry yelled, so I followed his voice and discovered Harry lying on the couch, Nathan on one side, Charlotte on the other whilst Frozen was on. “hey love.” I said, leaning behind the backrest as Harry leaned his head back.

 “hey Merida, I heard you did amazing.” He said, looking up at me. “I wouldn’t know.” I chuckled. “but I definitely enjoyed myself.” I added, leaning down to peck his lips. “that’s the important thing.” He stated, I was glad he wasn’t pushing through with telling me how well I was doing, I was just tired of hearing it for just doing my job now.

 “mhm.” I muttered, before kissing the top of Nathan and Charlotte’s head. “did Joseph make dinner or do I need to make dinner?” I asked, looking in the kitchen and not seeing anything. “he did, it’s in the oven, you just need to put the oven on and the salad is in the fridge.” Harry informed so I started walking around the couch and joined them on the couch.

 “lasagne?” I asked. “yep.” Harry chuckled, leaning over Nathan’s head and pecking my lips, adjusting his arm so it was resting on my shoulder, pulling me a little against him, without squashing Nathan in the middle.  

 Finishing the movie, I put the oven on whilst we went up and bathed Charlotte and Nathan separately. Dressing them so they could go and see George after dinner. In the end I was the only one having to shower after dinner and after that we took the car and drove to St. Mary’s to see Pippa and Jens already in the room when we arrived.

 “sorry.” I apologized entering the room first. “don’t worry” kate smiled, motioning her hand for us to continue walking in. “aunty Liv, Uncle Harry.” George yelled from his bed, almost jumping up, but settled back down with a small wince. “hey bud.” I smiled, walking up to his bed.

 “how are you?” I asked. “better,.” He smiled as I gave him a hug, Harry following after me. “charlotte.” He sighed, sibling when they were together they could kill each other, but now they both had tears in their eyes when they saw each other. “Nathan, George.” Was heard at the same time as Nathan jumped on his bed, where George was soon showing him and Charlotte what the buttons on his bed were for, to the amusement of the adults in the room.

 The six of us talked for a bit about random things, before Kate asked me to join her to the roof to catch some fresh air. “So how was the engagement?” she asked. “great, had a lot of fun, the people understood why you weren’t there.” I assured her. “thanks for falling in twice now.” She smiled as the elevator to the roof opened and we were looking over London’s Skyline.

 “of course, you’d do the same for me. Don’t worry about it, how has George been doing?” I asked, settling on the small bench. “great, the doctor said he can go home tomorrow noon, I’m glad we’ll finally be able to go home.” She smiled. “I can understand why.” I chucked. “mmm.” She muttered, resting her head against the wall with a tired sigh.

 “tired?” I asked, looking at her. “like you wouldn’t believe, hospital bed and chairs aren’t the most comfortable. “you want me to stay the night, you could go home with Will, rest for the night.” I suggested.

 “no.” she smiled, opening her eyes and lifting her head from against the wall. “it’s very sweet, but this is where I need to be, although I do miss Charlotte.” She admitted, sheepishly. “know that the offer still counts.” I assured her, smiling at her.

 “thanks, you’ve already done so much the last two days” she stated. “my pleasure, that’s what family is for” I told her. “yea,” she smiled sweetly. We talked for a bit longer, discussing Pippa’s Hen party and apparently Jens and Pippa had agreed to have it in the same country but on different parts. We were going to the Bahama’s for the occasion, a week long holiday, which three days we’d be spending separately.

 “you know I think we’ll be able to use it with the busy summer.” I admitted with a chuckle. “I can’t argue that” Kate agreed. “where will George and Charlotte go?” I asked. “mom and dad agreed to take them.” she told me.

 “Nathan?” she asked. “well seeing as my ex house mates are all joining us. “gran and gramps.” I told her. We talked for a bit longer, I think Kate was happy to catch some fresh air, before we headed back inside.

 “Nathan?” I scolded when I walked into the room of George to see the bed completely messed up, the leg part was pulled up, the head as well, George, Nathan and Charlotte nearly sandwiched between both side, “we’ve adjusted the bed at least ten times.” Harry and Will explained, when Kate walked over to the bed and adjusted it. “seems like George is feeling much better.” Pippa chuckled.

 “does seem like it.” Kate Muttered, before scolding them. we stayed for a bit longer, the kids after getting another scolding hadn’t tried to break the bed anymore.

 “seems like George is ready to go home.” Harry chuckled as I drove out of the front entrance gate, the flashes of the camera’s nearly blinding me. “god they really need to learn not to do that when someone’s driving” I muttered under my breath.

 “they should, doesn’t mean they want to know.” Harry explained, taking my hand in his and kissing the back of it. sighing I continued looking at the road, the skies having turned dark now. “and it seemed like George is getting better, he’s young, they are more resilient against all that.” I commented. “mhm.” He confirmed. “they do say that.” He replied.

 “and he’s living proof of it, wouldn’t be surprised if he were to walk out of the hospital tomorrow.” Harry pointed out with a chuckle. “Probably not.” I agreed, looking in the rear view mirror. “We have a sleeping duo.” I announced, smiling at the sweet scene on the backseats. Charlotte had fallen to the side with her head on Nathan’s shoulder and Nathan’s head was resting on top of Charlotte’s.

 when we arrived back at KP, I carried Charlotte upstairs and changed her in her Pyjama’s, whilst Harry did the same to Nathan in the other room, making sure she was tucked in completely, her cuddling blanket next to her head, glass of water on the nightstand I made my way out, to meet Harry in the hallway, coming out of the next doors room.

 “finally.” I breathed with a chuckle, walking up to Harry and wrapping my arm around his middle. “yea.” He smiled, kissing the side of my head. “you know we should see it as practice” Harry pointed out with a chuckle, walking us to our bedroom.

 “Sure, but I think I have had enough practise over the last years. Don’t get me wrong I love them to pieces, and I love watching them. but it’s nice to have some piece and quite as well.” I admitted with a chuckle. “I agree.” Harry smiled, wrapping his arms around me.

 “You know Miguel and I were watching your speech live in the office.” Harry started. “really, didn’t know I needed checking up on.” I commented, looking up at him. “It wasn’t like that and you know it.” he assured me with a sweet smile on his face. “mm.” I muttered. “Guess I’ll have to take your word for it.” I added.

 “Miguel was surprised to see you did a speech, it was planned to show the video of Kate” Harry pointed out. “I just couldn’t sit there whilst the video played, it was a last second decision, but how did you guys know?” I asked. “when are you going to learn that the press knows everything, they got wind of it apparently.” Harry smiled. “Mm.” I nodded my head.

 “So how did I do?” I smirked, looking up at him through my eyelashes. “Brilliant, you’re a natural. I know I’ve said it a million times and that you’re tired to hear me say it, but I’m incredibly proud of how well you’re doing all of this. Even if it’s your job now.” Harry declared, leaning his head a tiny bit lower with each word, our lips just not touching.

 “mm. so I did good?” I asked. “yea, a you know it.” he chuckled, his breath heating my face. “would it surprise you if I told you I hadn’t written down anything” I chuckled as I saw his surprised face. “Merida.” He started. “you didn’t write anything down?” he asked. “no. I never do, not back in school when we had to present something, not as a guide and not now. Why would I start now. I know from experience that if I plan out my words, I keep myself to it for the first five words and it’s gone after that. Ask Mia, Autumn, Jens and Daphne I was nightmare to do school projects with, I never held me to my text, but you know what.” I paused looking up.

 as he nodded his head and nudged my nose, stealing a kiss I continued. “it’s better that way, it comes from the heart and it isn’t stiff or influent. If you come up with the words then and there, sure you’ll pause a few times to think of the write words, but it comes over way better.” I finished.

 “but still, love.” He started, placing my finger against his lips I questioned: “You said I did great, right?”  “of course you did, definitely now I know you hadn’t planned anything.” He told me. “then don’t worry. This is how I work. If you’re worried I’ll forget something in the future, I won’t. ask the bunch about how good I was at it in the past and then I hadn’t the confidence to talk in public like I have now. If you know your organisation well and your heart is in it, you don’t need prepared words to tell the people why you’re there. Your heart will know and you let your heart speak.” I finished, running my hands from on his waist around his neck.

 “have a little faith in me” I chucked. “oh, I have Merida. More then you’ll ever know. I have faith in you as my Wife, as my Duchess, Princess, future Queen Consort. I believe in you” he ended in a whisper as he closed the gap between our lips.

 “Let me show you how proud I am.” he whispered, leaving butterfly kisses in his wake as he made a trail to my ear and down my neck. Nodding my head, he lifted me up by my bum.

 ***

 when I woke up the next morning, I discovered I was alone in bed. Getting out of bed I got some comfortable legging and sweater from my closet and went to brush my teeth and get ready for the day. I only realised it was nearly eleven in the morning when I picked my phone from my nightstand.

 “thanks for letting me sleep in.” I whispered in Harry’s ear, wrapping my arms around him from behind. “Your welcome, Merida.” He whispered, leaning his head to the side so I could kiss his lips.  “but to be honest, I haven’t been awake that long either. They slept in as well,” he nodded his head at Charlotte and Nathan at the dining table.

 “still. Thanks.” I whispered against his lips. We settled around the table, eating the eggs Harry had prepared. “When’s George coming home?” Charlotte asked, looking up at me. “Not to long now.” I told her, pushing her hair back and I knew immediately that Harry hadn’t helped her comb her hair, she was blessed with her mother’s hairs and for a almost four year old she had quite a lot of hair.

 So after breakfast was done, Harry and Nathan would put away the mess as I combed Charlotte’s hair and when I finished my phone lit up. “Hey Kate” I answered “hey, how is Charlotte doing?” she immediately asked. “great, she’s with me now, Uncle harry forgot to brush her hair.” I said, pulling a face at her. “ooh, I can imagine.” I heard her chuckle over the line. “How’s George?” I asked, seeing Charlotte holding her hand out to get the phone.

 “great, monkey has been given the green light, we’re just packing up the stuff. we should be home in an hour.” She told me and I heard the relief in her voice. “that’s great.” I claimed, happy they wouldn’t have to spend another night in the hospital.

 “yea, it is.” She said. “so I’ll see you soon.” She added, I handed Charlotte my phone, whilst I went down to inform Harry who was relieved that George was coming home.

 45 minutes later The Cambridge’s left the hospital, not waiting to get a photo opp. Will carrying George to the car for all the world to see though and you could see the tiredness and exhaustion in both their eyes as they faced the world and drove off.

 we offered to watch George and Charlotte in the afternoon, so they could rest. But they would have none of it, being happy to be home and have both their kids with them. they’d even taken Nathan with them, with the hope that if the three of them settled down for a movie, they would be able to keep George a bit calm and less restless, he was thinking that going home meant, he could play outside and kick a ball and climb trees.

 Kate’s idea had worked marvellously as the three of them hadn’t moved from the couch and watched several cartoons, while Harry and I update Kate on yesterday’s engagement we had taken over. Sure we’d told them yesterday the basics, but now it was a full report, so if they went back in the future, they’d know all they could.  

 liz would take Nathan of their hands tonight as we left and went to prepare for our dinner with the guys of the expedition that had brought Harry and I together.  

 “I’m looking forward to seeing them again.” Harry stated, from his closet. “me to.” I admitted, we’d grown quite close with them over the years and Harry was already close with them, some of them from the previous expeditions and he’d served with one of them in Afghanistan.

 It had been since the wedding we had gotten the chance to really sit down and talk to them, unless you count quick phonecalls and messages as catching up. “Merida? You ready?” I heard him say impatiently from our bedroom, securing my earring, I checked myself in the mirror and walked out of the closet. “You look beautiful.” Harry smiled, walking over to me and wrapping his arm around my waist, kissing the side of my head.

 So that’s the chapter. I hope you’ve enjoyed it. Please let me know what you think, the first three to do so get to see a preview from next chapter and get to ask me a question. I look forward to your comments.