#ooc: I took a break. came back. tried again and it's very much the same pattern.

[letsriddlemethislucifer]

[[ Should I stop posting open starters for my ocs at this point? It's just a small bummer realizing there are no real interactions on a bunch of them.]]

[ranhaitanisgf]

HANAAA!!!!!!!! Congrats on 2k <33 I'M SO PROUD OF YOU For this eventt, may I request Enemies to lovers, the scene being seven minutes in heaven with BAJI!!! There's no specific scene I want SO HAVE FUN WRITING AND AGAIN CONGRATS ON 2K ILY <333333

— baji keisuke // enemies to lovers // seven minutes in heaven

[𖤐] first post of being back!! the first person i talked to after i got back on was sin, so i made sure to type up ur req first 😭 i will get through all of them trust!! baji might be a little ooc since i'm very rusty, but hopefully you all still enjoy!

wc: 2.3k+

masterlist || 2k masterlist

as soon as you walked into mikey’s house and saw a very familiar face, you could feel your eyebrow twitching as you turned to your side, the bubbling anger you were feeling seemingly leaking into the air. chifuyu, who was standing beside you, chuckled nervously as you gave him a piercing look. 

“chifuyu…what the hell kinda sick joke is this?! you told me that-” 

“wow, i think i see takemitchy over there! i think he’s looking for me! i should go and see what he wants!” before you could grab onto him and force an explanation out of him, he had deftly avoided you and walked straight into the small party, slipping through the crowd and disappearing. 

you sighed, scratching the nape of your neck for no particular reason as you tried to figure out what your next move was. you could just leave the party and pretend you never came, which at first thought seemed like the best idea. but after thinking about it for more than two seconds, you decided that you definitely didn’t want to give that sort of satisfaction to him, since it would most certainly make its way back to him that you had shown up at some point. 

and so, even though you could see baji keisuke laughing annoyingly loud in the distance, you decided to walk in anyways. 

i mean really, were you going to let some immature and stubborn prick keep you from having a good time? absolutely not. 

mingling with the rest of your friends had proved to make the choice worth it, especially since you had some absolutely priceless polaroid photos of mikey hanging from draken’s braid, (it would always prove a mystery how that managed to even happen in the first place). you’d decided to forgive chifuyu without much repercussion for him aside from a punch in the arm, which he took gracefully. 

you were sipping a mystery fruit punch when he took a break from dancing, leaning on the wall next to you. your eyes flicked over to him before you rolled your eyes in faux annoyance. 

“still can’t believe you betrayed me like that matsuno. in your heart, you truly are a traitor.” the corners of lips turned down into a frown, shaking your head at him as you looked away. you couldn’t see him, but you could almost picture his eyes rolling. 

“y’know, you and baji-san really need to get over whatever thing you guys are hung up on. i didn’t tell you he would be here for your own good, just so you know.” you snorted at the response.

“wooooow, yeah, definitely for my own good…even though i literally hate his guts-” 

“is this little twerp botherin’ ya chifuyu?” a deep voice suddenly interrupted. 

oh dear god. 

you immediately shot a look of disgust to baji, who had made his way over to the two of you. there was a taunting smirk on his face as he stared you down. you feigned throwing up at the sight of him, which only made him chuckle a bit as he lowered his face to your level, that same smirk still spread across his lips. 

very luscious lips…..

“is getting to my height supposed to intimidate me orr…?” you questioned, raising a brow as you took another sip of fruit punch, seemingly unbothered by his presence, (you were very much bothered to even be seeing his face). 

“nah, i just think you got somethin’ in your teeth, (l/n).” he chuckled. your eyes immediately widened as you held a hand up to your mouth, running your tongue over your teeth to feel for any sort of debris. baji leaned back, the same damn infuriating smirk stuck on his face as he said something to chifuyu. you didn’t catch it though; you were too busy trying to see if there really was something in your teeth.

“everyone get over here, we’re gonna play seven minutes in heaven!” you suddenly heard mikey shout, (was his voice slurring or were you crazy?). you looked over at chifuyu, raising a brow at him. he merely shrugged at you, walking over to where everyone else was beginning to sit in a circle. 

you joined him, sitting to his side as you looked around, wondering how this was going to work with 90% of the circle being, well…dudes. draken sat next to you, muttering the same wonderance under his breath, making you snort a bit. 

before you could comment on it, chifuyu leaned over to you, an amused yet sheepish look on his face. “by the way, you don’t actually have anything in your teeth…” 

“what!?” you whisper-yelled. a rambunctious laugh came from baji, who was sitting on chifuyu’s other side, laughing quite animatedly at your expense. 

this is exactly why i don’t like that fool. 

“you stupid asshole!! i swear to god, you never get less infuriating, do you!?” 

“it ain’t my fault if you don’t have a sense of humor, (l/n)!” baji snickered. “you shoulda seen the look on your face!” you glared at him, and you might have even swung at him, (it wouldn’t have been the first time) if it wasn’t for mikey stumbling into the middle of the circle, placing an empty soda bottle on the ground. 

“i think you all know the rules, and if you don’t, then i guess too bad! we’re gonna start nowww, so make sure you guys get ready to pucker up~!” multiple groans were heard from everyone at mikey’s cheeky remark, along with urges for him to just get on with it and spin the bottle. 

“oh, before we start, (y/n)-chan! can you take my spot over there instead? i wanna sit next to draken!” mikey whined. 

he really reminded you of a toddler at times like these. 

“yeah, yeah, sure.” you muttered, hauling yourself up and moving over across the circle. 

“yayyyy thank you!” 

as you sat down again, you began to think that there was something…alcoholic in the fruit punch. your head felt quite a bit fuzzy, and when you were walking it was a little bit harder to place your feet where you wanted them to go. you’d probably be fine though, no sweat. 

yeahhhh, it’s fine. 

“psst, (y/n), you’re up!” sitting to your right was mitsuya, who had nudged you a little bit to get your attention. there was a bit of an amused smile on his face, making you question what had happened in the moment you’d spaced out. 

“huh?” 

“you and baji got chosen by the bottle.” 

“oh alright i guess…” you mumbled, smacking your cheeks to wake up a little bit. it took a moment after that to register what mitsuya had said. “wait, what!?” you yelled, shooting up. you stumbled a bit as you stood up, but you didn’t even care about that at the moment. your eyes locked onto baji, who was already standing. his aura radiated annoyance; he wasn’t even looking at you. 

“whatever, let’s just get this over with already.” he muttered. your mouth opened and closed, trying to form a sentence. 

this is totally a setup! 

you didn’t get a chance to do anything else before someone shoved you out of the circle and in the direction of the closet. 

“wait- why do i have to-!” a final shove secured you into the closet, making you almost trip over your own feet as you tried to get a sense of balance back. there wasn’t even a second to prepare yourself before someone was shoved on top of you, making the both of you topple over and hit the wall. your head slammed against it particularly hard, making your vision go blurry for a moment as you looked to the door. 

“goddamnit, chifuyu…” you mumbled. you furrowed your brows as you felt a dull pulsing pain in your head, likely stemming from the fall and also whatever alcohol that was probably put in the punch bowl. 

oh great. this is just great. 

you tried to squirm out from under baji, who had unceremoniously been tossed on top of you. it was to no avail though; you had neither the energy nor the strength to do that. 

“you mind getting up off me…? you’re heavy as hell.” 

“yeah yeah, i’m goin’. jesus, why are they so serious about this weird shit…” baji lifted himself off of you, and as your eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness, you could see him holding out his hands to find a wall to lean on. he didn’t have to try very hard; the closet was so small that his hands could touch both walls. 

you went to lift yourself, but the dull pain in your head turned into a pounding, making you shift into a sitting position instead. a groan slipped through your lips as you closed your eyes, your fingers going to massage your temples in a futile attempt to soothe the pain. 

“y’alright there?” 

“my head hurts like a bitch, but other than that. yeah.” silence swept over the two of you after your rather curt response, leaving the atmosphere a bit tense. you felt a bit awkward about the situation; you were basically mortal enemies, so what were either of you supposed to say? 

you just hoped he couldn’t hear your heart beating a little faster than normal. 

okay, so, maybe you didn’t completely hate him, but in your defense, it was completely warranted. i mean, even as an elementary schooler, who just goes around telling everyone in the grade that you had a crush on him?! oh, that’s right, him. sure, maybe it was an immature reason to go through all of this, but you were not one to let a grudge go easily, even if that grudge is all the way from elementary school. 

the two of you sat in silence for a little while longer before he finally spoke. 

“so how long you gonna keep this little act up?” 

“excuse me?” you scoffed. “what in the world are you even talking about-”

“oh come on (y/n), you can’t seriously think that we’re actually ‘enemies’ or whatever you go around to tellin’ people.” his casual use of your first name made your heart skip a beat, but you ignored it. 

“i’m not that shallow that i would just go around saying things that i don’t mean, for your information. you might not have known then, but that betrayal of trust is not something that i just go around forgiving so easily, especially since you’re so infuriating now.” baji barked out a sharp laugh at your response, sending a surge of annoyance through you. 

he leaned down towards you, shortening the distance between the two of you significantly. even though he probably couldn’t see you, you still quirked a brow, wondering what he was up to. you could faintly see a smirk on his face as he rested his head on his hand, his eyes dark eyes staring at you. 

it almost felt like his eyes were staring right at your soul, making a small shiver go down your spine. 

“heh, you’re a lot more stubborn than i ever gave you credit for, (y/n). i didn’t seriously think that you were still hung up on that.” 

“still hung up on that?? what in the world else would i even be-” 

“do you wanna know why i did that?” 

“...what?” the smirk on his face turned into a softer smile playing on his lips, although his eyes still showed a glint of playfulness. 

“you heard me. do you wanna know?” 

“sure, why not.” 

it’s like you could really have any reason to warrant doing something like that anyways. 

“it’s cause i liked you, stupid.” 

it’s probably the last words you ever expected him to say. 

what…

you just stared at him, mouth open, no words forming to even try and respond to him. 

“you’re seriously that surprised? man, i thought chifuyu was jokin’...” baji’s head dropped down as he let out a loud sigh, his fingers weaving through his hair. 

“...i mean…what the hell was i supposed to think baji…” you managed to get out, looking to the side out of pure embarrassment. now that you knew, you just felt silly and stupid, shame flooding through you. of course; he was an elementary school boy, so of course he would go and brag about it to everyone. 

“i guess i sent some mixed signals there; sorry (y/n). do you accept though?” 

“accept what?” baji scoffed at you and rolled his eyes playfully, leaning forward to flick your forehead. 

“ow!” 

“my feelings, duh. do i have to spell everything out for you?” he looked at you expectantly, patiently waiting for an answer, (which was very unlike him). 

“i-uh, well-”

“time’s up, lovebirds!” a knock from the door interrupted you, and there was only a moment before the door was opened, flooding the small closet with light. you squinted your eyes, the light seeming too bright after being in darkness for a while. 

“so, did you guys get over your feud yet, or are you guys still enemies?” chifuyu asked, a somewhat knowing look on his face as he looked at baji kneeling in front of you. the boy in front of you merely stood up, grinning while he helped you up. 

“i guess we’ll have to see.” his fingers slid between yours, grabbing your hand and pulling you out of the closet, past chifuyu, past the party and outside. 

the cool air of the night hit your face as the two of you walked, sobering you up a little bit and making you realize that baji was still holding your hand. you tried to free it from his gasp, but he held a firm grip, finally slowing down and stopping to face you. a boyish smile was on his face, making your cheeks heat up as he held steady eye contact that you couldn’t look away from. 

“so, what’ll it be, (y/n)?”

[eitaababe]

˗ˏˋ WON'T HAVE YOU ! ´ˎ˗

din djarin x reader.

this is 100% self indulgent LMAO, based off of kanej from six of crows :) (maybe ooc mando?? it's my first time writing for him lol it might be iffy)

warnings — mentions of blood / injuries, shooting, typical star wars fights

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

You sat on Din's cot in the Razor Crest, desperately trying to get the whining green baby to sleep. Mando was off, collecting another bounty for credits whilst you were left here babysitting. It was part of the deal, after all.

He took you in for protection, and you would prove yourself useful.

Din had found you on one of his hunts for a bounty— well, more like you had found him.

You were being held captive by the very man he was after, and when you ran into the Mandalorian you quickly made an alliance with him, leading him straight to the bounty.

You told Mando little of your past, and he knew better than to push. What he did know, was that you needed out and could be a valuable assest, showing your expertise in mechanics and skilled fighting.

You would almost, dare say, consider the new arrangement, safe for you.

Which was new from what you'd ever known, always trapped and having to report back to the same place all your life. Without knowing if you had a real family out there or not, without knowing how much more of your life you'd have to live.

So yeah, you could get pretty used to this.

A sound of the hatch opening caught your attention, meeting the familiar beskar helmet. You were silent for a moment, trying to hide your excitement at his return when you noticed his limp.

"What happened?" You asked, setting Grogu down carefully and rushing to help him.

"Bounty." Came a curt response, and you couldn't say you were shocked at his cold demeanor.

You almost rolled your eyes in the vagueness of his answer, "Very descriptive, Mando."

No response.

Huffing, you grabbed a kit, handing it over to him.

"Thank you." Was his only response as he tried his best to walk normally over to a nearby table, opening up the kit.

Watching silently as he removed some of his armor (never the helmet, you came to learn), you saw him slightly lift the cloth worn underneath, a wound on the back of his torso. He hissed as he reached back, struggling to clean off the blood.

"Let me help you," you finally spoke up, being met with the stubborn look that you were somehow able to understand underneath his helmet. "Din."

At the call of his name he finally complied, handing over the clumped up rag, turning around.

With shaky breaths you dabbed the cloth in water, hoping to clean the wound up a bit before applying any bacta.

You moved slow, hesitant towards his bare side, the rag finally making contact with him. He jumped at the touch, clearly holding back any noises of pain. "Sorry," you mumbled, retracting your hand away for just a second. "But I have to clean it up before I can put any bacta on."

Finally being able to focus on the task at hand, but still moving carefully, you cleaned it up the best you could, setting the dirty towel aside and spraying bacta on the wound, practically wincing with Din anytime he jolted suddenly.

"Finished." You called out, and only when he turned, helmet almost meeting your face, then did you realize just how close the two of you really were.

"Thank you. Again." He breathed quietly, also aware of the close proximity. Neither of you daring to break away, you bath sat silently on stools, and for a moment, you swear you saw him lean just forward, his hand twitching to meet yours.

You find yourself caught in whatever trance this was, heart beating rapidly—

When the cooing of Grogu on the floor snaps you back.

"I should, um," you stumbled across your words, clumsily standing to grab the little one. "Take him. You should probably wrap that. So it doesn't get infected, or anything."

Only nodding in response, the Mandalorian stayed and watched as you walked further and further away from him, out of reach.

Once again.

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

You go weeks without addressing anything of the situation.

You tagged along with Mando in the next bounty hunt, leaving the ship and Grogu in Peli's hands as you stopped at Tatooine.

The mission consisted of someone who was associated with the man who once held custody of you— who on a technicality, still did. And you'd be lying if you said you weren't terrified of the chance of you having to go back to that life once more, but found solace in the fact he was captured previously.

You and Din split up, figuring secrecy was best suited for this mission. Stealth was always your forte, and clearly not his. He stood out too much with the armor, of course.

So you two went separate routes to the coordinates, as you took to the rooftops and Mando by streets. You'd kept him in your line of sight for the most part, seeing him successfully locate his way.

"I'm here." You quietly called to the comms, standing on top of the roof of the supposed building.

"Going in." He replied as you watched him head into the building, you looking for a nearby latch or window to sneak in through.

Your plans were cut short, however, when a bullet hits you in the arm.

"Fuck!" You cried out, crawling over to hide behind a large chimney. The shots fired towards the bricks, debris flying. You pulled out your gun, shooting from over your shoulder, taking the sniper out. "Mando! I've been compromised!" Not bothering to listen for a response you peeked in the direction of the (now dead) shooter.

You quickly learned that there were more than one, though, when more shots were fired from a different direction. You ripped off a piece of your sleeve and wrapped it around your arm for good measure on the bullet wound, and dropped from the rooftop to behind the building, shielding yourself from sight.

"Where is she?"

"I don't see her!"

You put your gun back in its pouch, opting for a knife. You followed the voices, locating them and lurking behind before taking them out, trying to find a way inside the cantina Din went inside when you were tazed, groaning in pain as you fell to the ground.

"Did you really think you would get away so easily, little bird?"

Your heart sunk to your stomach at the familiar voice, looking up to see the very face you hoped you wouldn't.

"Cat got your tongue?" He chuckled, and you were paralyzed, unable to move as he stood over you. "I won't let you get away, not this time. You'll never—"

A simple three shots ended his rant.

"Y/n!"

Your head whipped around to meet the Mandalorian, bending over to check on you. "What happened?"

Almost too much was going on for you to process, you didn't even realize the beads of tears that ran down your cheeks. Too much that you didn't realize how the Mandalorian, the very same, stoic one who mostly only spoke to either Grogu or to say thank you, the very same one who never let you get too close for comfort, was on his knees. For you.

"I'm- I-" you breathed, the floodgates rushing open. You silently leaned into his chest, and for once, Din didn't push you away.

"Let's just get you back to the Crest, alright?"

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

After a brief explanation and some calming down, Peli left you and Mando in the newly fixed Crest, still keeping Grogu inside, both of you insisting not to wake him from his nap yet.

Still shocked, you sat down silently, doing nothing but staring at a wall. You were so numb that you didn't even notice Din taking out the kit, tending to your wound as you did his not too long ago. For once, the closeness didn't affect you whatsoever, the same voice repeating itself in your head over and over again.

"You won't get away this time."

You succumb to the thoughts of your head, still scared, despite knowing he was gone and who was beside you.

"Hey," Din's voice called out to you, your glossy eyes snapping over to meet his helmet. "He's gone now. You don't answer to him anymore. He's gone and he doesn't own you. You're free."

The words you waited to hear all your life don't feel as good as you thought they would.

Freedom was something you once thought was unattainable, something you dreamt of. But now that you have it?

It almost feels just as horrifying.

"You can do anything you've ever wanted to do," Din continued. "You can leave. Be free of this place, go wherever."

"I could leave?" You inquired. The thought of what you'd do now that you have a life that's your own and only yours has crossed your mind just a few times, and not in many of those thoughts have you thought about leaving Din and Grogu.

But would it be for the better?

You contemplate your decisions, would they even want you to stay? They were doing just fine on their own before you even arrived, they clearly would be just fine if you left. Figuring it was an invitation to leave you wordlessly get up, turning your back to him.

"You could also stay."

Four simple words make you stop in your tracks, and cowardly, you don't look back at him. "And why should I?"

"Because I want you to," He speaks, and after all this time, only now are you able to detect the emotion in his voice. You turn around to the beskar covered man, never seeing him look so small. "For him. For us."

For a moment you think he's talking about both himself and Grogu, but you understand that when he says us, he means you and him. And it should be heartwarming, it should make you want to jump into his arms and accept, but it only makes you angry.

"Us?" You repeat, and in a tone that chills him to his core. "There is no us, Din."

He's pleading now, and if only you could see his expression under the mask. "Please."

"And if I stay?" You push, walking slowly towards him. "How will I have you?"

"All of me."

You only shake your head, knowing it wasn't possible. "All of you, with a full armor of beskar every night. All of you, with short and meaningless conversations. All of you, with gloves on and hands I'll never get to truly hold. All of you, with lips that will never touch and a face I'll never see."

"My creed-"

"This isn't about your creed, Din Djarin," you practically whisper, scared if you talk any louder your voice will crack. And Din knows, Maker he does, that this isn't about his creed. It isn't about the armor that he's wearing but about the armor he puts up, about the space that he's put between you two and what he guards his heart with.

"If you think for a moment that this is about what you wear," you pause, and Din has never wanted you to see his expression underneath his helmet more than his does in this moment. "Then you really don't know me at all. If I cannot have you, truly have you, without the armor," you press against his chest plate with a light hand, and stuck in place, he doesn't give into the instinct to hold it.

"Then I won't have you at all."

─── ⭐️.

[sweetieviktor]

"take me back to the night we met", feat. viktor.

summary: you knew he was dieing, but seeing him using shimmer was too much to bare . based on the song "the night we met", by lord huron.

word count: 720.

content warning: season 1, act 3 spoilers! idk if shimmer use count as a cw, but anyways this is angst and it doesn't have a happy ending!

author notes: there's so much time since i've written fanfiction!! but i loved doind this one and i swear that i cried while writing this. and this may be very ooc and doesn't match the scenes in season 1, act 3, but i dont have time to watch it again now and i was so hyped up bcs of season 2 that i just had to write something, yk? also, there may be some typos or grammar errors even though i re-read this like 3 times i think lol. but yeah, here it is!

you came back to his lab expecting to see him doing good, maybe working on his research, too focused on any stuff he was doing at the moment and not noticing you by the door, but he wasn't in there, or so it looked like.

he was hunched over his desk, in his hands was a glass tube, the remaining of the purple liquid shimmering in the dark room, illuminating just enough to draw his weak silhouette amongst the shadows.

“viktor…?” was everything you said while getting closer to him, walking with slow steps, trying to make no sounds to alarm him.

“stop.” raising a hand, that was all he said.

just as you were told, you stopped on your tracks, observing that, his once perfect hand, was now painted in a shade of purple, the same that was inside the glass recipient.

it can't be. right?

“what you did to yourself?”

“i did what needed to be done.” he was so baretoned, you didn't understand why he seemed so rude, so crude, so… unlike him.

when his words settled in, it felt like your stomach was turning, wrapping itself around your guts, making you sick. you felt sick, for him.

“please, please, viktor, don't tell me that you're using sh-” “yes.”

of course you knew about his condition, of course you knew he wasn't doing good at all, and mostly, you knew that things were meant to end, one way or another. but you didn't think he would kill himself like this.

and this was all you needed to break.

“why you didn't told me? i could have helped you, we could find a way to work through it,” the tears started to prick on your eyes, your voice breaking, the anger at yourself pooling into your core. “you wouldn't need to use shimmer, vik...”

the feeling that the universe stole and took all that once mattered to you was what drove you insane. the feeling that you could make things different, make things better, the oh so simple solution that you could find, if only he had told you.

“it’s not that easy! you wouldn't understand if i told you sooner. no one would understand it, even if they tried really hard to.” he turned his head towards your direction, looking at your face for a brief second, before turning his gaze back to the ground, his purple irises trying to focus on something that wasn't your saddened face, now, feeling his own eyes burning, burning even more than the blood running in his veins. “we are in piltover, the city of progress, and yet, i am stuck behind, and i'm dieing. so, i needed to do something, and i did.”

“what you don’t understand is that you're destroying yourself, viktor. destroying yourself so slowly that it almost feels like torture. i fear that i wouldn't be able to see you for another day.” you sobbed, the tears rolling down and he didn't dare to look at your eyes again, he knew that you were crying. he knew it and he couldn't bear the thought that he was the one that made you cry. “if there is a god somewhere, i wish they could turn back time and take me back to the night we met. maybe things could be different, right?”

looking at him, a weak, nervous smile was all you could get out while crying, thinking to yourself when things started to get this wrong and how you let it happen, without even realizing what was wrong. how could you let him do this to himself?

your body was shaking, it felt like the whole world was trembling. the nonstoping thoughts hammering your head, your heart a mile per minute, the air in your lungs wasn't enough. everything, everything seemed like it was crushing down on you, right in this moment.

“i'm sorry. i'm so sorry... i need to go. now.”

you needed to get out of here, you needed to breathe.

you headed back to the door, wishing that some cold breeze would cool you down, would just stop your mind and racing heart. wishing for him to be fine again. praying for any and all gods that lived in the skies and beyond, praying for him to be alive. just for a bit more.

[akiraruru]

Hi I saw you was in need of ideas 😁 and I saw you like ragbros (like me) how about hc (platonic)where they have a little sister (like 18-19year old) who is also adopted like kaeya and is also traumatized before she came to dawn winery and she is more traumatized. She is also super powerful like she is a mage (like in historical manhwa) and has electro vision is also a member of knights of favonis. Sorry I went for too much details 😅

If you don't write platonic hc, how about hurt to comfort fic of diluc/ kaeya/Zhongli where the reader thinks he ib love with someone else (like jean for diluc rosaria for kaeya guzhiong for Zhongli).

Sorry for long ask. Take care 😘

A/n: sadly I'm not very good at platonic stuff, hope u like this oneshot tho!

Included: Kaeya, gn reader, Rosaria

Cw/s: mentions of drinking, angst, possibly ooc, I suck at writing angst

Kaeya had always been passionate about the things he loves. Though, recently everything has been going much worse than before, it's like his path throughout life has become rocky, rather than ups and downs, it has really been down these past few days. He went out drinking more and more, constantly visiting his brother's tavern, chugging down beer down his throat hoping to wash down his foul feeling.

You understand what was Kaeya's feeling and you always have, you gave him time, time to think carefully and to rest his mind and body. Though you never expected it to come to this, you never expected it to become this bad; you felt sorry for him.

You tried to talk to him about it to at least help ease some of his foul feelings yet every time you do he just tells you

"I'm fine"

"I'm okay by myself"

"There's no need"

In such a tired tone, he always pushes you away. Why? Why didn't he want your help? Maybe he just wanted some time... But didn't you already give him a week? All these thoughts and questions run through your head all at the same time it's giving you a headache.

During his time at the tavern, he has encountered Rosaria multiple times in a row and yes, you have witnessed some of those times and nothing bad seems to be happening. After all those encounters with each other, Rosaria made the first move; starting the conversation first.

He knew Rosaria, a close friend of that he hasn't connected to in a long while.

"Hey, you alright?" Rosaria asks.

She looked down at the blue haired knight that had his head laying on the table, beer in hand.

"Hmm... no" Kaeya responds, his words coming out wobbly due to the alcohol.

Chats between Rosaria and Kaeya was pretty constant again, sharing small talk whenever they passed each other, talking during breaks... Of course you took notice and didn't seem to mind, I mean, they're friends after all. And they haven't talked to each other for a while so it's understandable.

It's been weeks and kaeya has started to feel better, more upright and was coming back to his usual smug personality. You were happy, proud even, but you felt a little... what do you call it? Jealous? No, that can't be right. You? Jealous of who?

Maybe it's because it was Rosaria that helped Kaeya more than you did, it's great that she helped but during those times, why did Kaeya only talk to Rosaria about it? Why not you? He always pushes you away but why not to Rosaria either? Is there something special about her? Questions are running through your mind again.

He's been out of the house recently too, often meeting up with Rosaria. At this point, you think he sees her more than you, could it be that he fell out of love? Too many questions and possibilities are in your mind, overthinking every little thing.

You decided to confront him during dinner.

"Kaeya.. is there something wrong?" You ask worryingly.

"Nothing's wrong. Why?" Kaya responds.

"It's just that uhm... You've been.. I don't know, distant?" You furrow your brows slightly as you speak.

"Distant, how?" Kaeya tilts his head.

You take a deep breath thinking about saying it or not.

"Do you not love me anymore?" You finally asked.

"What? Of course I love you, why did you think that?" Kaeya replies.

"You've been hanging out with Rosaria a lot too..." You fidget with your fingers.

"Ahh, I see now" He chuckled.

"Wanna know why?" Kaeya smiles.

You nod in reply, desperate for answers. You watched as he got up towards the calendar and pointed out your anniversary and.. oh it's today. Wait, it's today?

Kaeya goes to a cabinet and pulls out two boxes wrapped delicately, each of different colors with a ribbon wrapped around it like a bow, a letter on top of the two boxes.

"What's this?" You ask, inspecting the box.

"I wanted to make up for all the things you did for me" Kaeya smiles softly.

The letter contained 3 paragraphs about his undying love for you, alongside a kiss mark on the bottom.

"I needed some help so I went to Rosaria" He explains.

You open the boxes, careful not to damage it. The 1st box contains a silver/gold (what color you want) necklace below a tulip, the necklace has your birthstone as it's pendant, shaped into a heart, your name and Kaeya's was faintly sketched onto the back of the pendant.

2nd box contained earrings that matched the necklace, right below a rose.

"Wow... I.." You were left utterly speechless.

Now you were the one feeling guilty, especially since it's your anniversary and you don't have nothing for him

"Don't worry about your gift, you being here is enough" Kaeya brings you into a tight, warm embrace.

[eternal-armin]

bag of bones.

after finally escaping your abuser, you go to the one person you trust. reader: masculine. warning: implied sexual abuse, distress, perhaps slightly ooc eddie.

"get off of me!" you cried, squirming out from beneath him. you ended up landing hard on the ground beside the bed, barely allowing yourself a moment of gasping pain before scrambling to your feet. he grabbed your wrist to stop you. his nails dug into your skin.

"where the fuck do you think you're going?" he didn't yell. that fucking terrified you and he knew it. he didn't need to see the horror in your expression.

"let go of me, god damnit!" your voice broke bad with each word. you tried and failed to wrangle yourself out of his grasp. the desperation you heard, even in your own voice, made you feel small. weak. "please just let me go!" and when he didn't, you didn't hesitate anymore. you bit his hand like a feral dog and the taste of copper flooded into your mouth. he let you go.

you fucking booked it, slamming the door shut and jamming it with a chair before stumbling down the stairs right to the phone. you heard him trying to get out, heard him shouting words you couldn't make out.

"munson residence," eddie chimed. he sounded content.

"eddie! eddie, i need you to pick me up at the corner store!" you could barely get through your words.

"[y/n]? what's going on?"

"eddie, promise me!"

"what the fuck is happening?!"

"eddie, damnit, please, just tell me you'll meet me!"

"yes! yes, of course, i—i'm fucking going right now!"

you hurriedly hung up the phone, hearing the chair fall and the door slam hard against the wall, surely leaving a hole. you ran to the door, grabbing the keys, both his pair and yours, and booking it outside. it was raining and pitch black aside from the street lights. you ran and you didn't even think about stopping or looking behind you or the pain of running barefoot on pavement or the tears mixing with the rain on your cheeks. his animalistic shouting lost its humanity, and you couldn't hear a damn word of it. you would never have to hear it again.

for the first time, the first time, if you ran fast enough, you would be free.

it was impossible for you to cry right now. you could barely breathe, you couldn't stop, your body and mind were mortified at the thought of slowing down. you could barely feel your limbs. it was too cold. you were running faster and longer than your stamina allowed. all your energy was being channeled into escaping. somehow, there was an odd comfort knowing that you wouldn't cry for him right now.

the store's led lights came into your view, flickering like static behind the rain. heaving breaths escaped into mist before the glass doors swung open. you scrambled to hide yourself behind a shelf, sitting down on the ground, allowing yourself to breath and listen to the music playing over the speakers.

your breaths were ragged and desperate. your lungs had tightened, hell, you could barely wheeze. it took a while before you were able to take a real, deep breath. it felt like you had been resuscitated, brought back from the dead, without the glee of returning to a good life. you would prefer to stay dead.

you leaned your head back against the shelf wall.

eventually, you looked down at your hands. your knuckles were white from clutching the keys, and now that you weren't running, the adrenaline was dying down. you began to feel the stinging. slowly opening your hands, you pocketed the keys, carefully massaging your palms free of those dark indents. that made it hurt worse, and it was very possible that you'd held them tight enough to break the skin. but you kept doing it. you would rather deal with this pain than think. there was too much to think about and not a small bit of it was good.

"you can't be in here without shoes," the clerk said rather quietly. you hadn't heard them approach—you damn near jumped out of your skin.

you rubbed away the rainwater from your face. you could barely feel the same water drenching your hair, your clothes, which now clung uncomfortably to your skin. "i-i'm sorry. i'm gonna be picked up soon, i just—i-i needed to hide. for a minute." you couldn't meet their gaze, but if you did, you would see their concern.

"alright." they hesitated to speak again. "are you in danger?" they asked, quieter than ever. they didn't ask for any further details, they didn't judge the way you shrunk in on yourself, they made it appear like they were busy. anyone who looked in the window would not see you, nor a suspicious-acting store clerk.

you took a breath. it felt like life itself was screeching back into your veins. "depends on how fast he can run," you mumbled.

tires screeched outside. you jumped again, and once more, you could no longer breathe properly. you began hyperventilating. he could not be in that car, it was impossible, his keys were in your pocket and you could feel them—but you managed to convince yourself that he was about to enter the shop. you tried your hardest not to think about what he would do if he caught you.

the glass door swung back open, bell chiming loudly, and among it, you could hear the panicked and quick breaths of the one and only eddie munson. "[y/n]?" carefully, slowly, you stood up. it was a shock to eddie, seeing you so disheveled and frightened. you were wide-eyed, shaking, and not just from the cold. not just because you were freezing under drenched clothes and lack of warmth from exercise. it was a similar shock to you to see him so utterly worried and horrified, standing in front of you in his pajamas and half-tied shoes.

"... jesus h. christ."

the world felt like it was in slow motion as you ran to him. he engulfed you in a proper bear hug, holding you close and tight and cozy, like his arms could protect you from all the pain in the world. you felt yourself tearing up again. the safety you felt in his arms reminded you just how far from safe you had been. you wanted to scream. cry. and never stop

"i don't think i'm letting you go this time. i-it sounded like you—you were gonna die, i just.." he didn't finish that sentence. he didn't need to. "are you okay? are—are you hurt? who am i fuckin' kidding, of course you aren't okay." he gently brushed his fingers over your hair. it calmed you down, just like always. but calm felt dangerous.

"...can we go to your trailer?"

you didn't sound like yourself anymore. you wondered if you ever would.

eddie parted the closed blinds, peeking out one last time to quell both your anxieties and his own. it had been a little while. quiet. here you were, mind becoming fogged out of desperation to forget, curled up in a blanket on his couch. there was a strange cocktail of emotion burrowing in your stomach. on one hand, you were weak, barely able to get away and unable to run anywhere. on another, you felt like you were rotting from the inside out, turning into fertilizer that couldn't nurture any plants because it had been poisoned from the beginning.

and it felt like it was your fault. like all of it was your fault.

"i'm gonna kill 'em if i see him," eddie muttered. his voice was laced with venom, and it wasn't a joke. he sat down beside you, fidgeting with the rings on his fingers. "the world isn't gonna fucking miss him." he glanced at you, at the short-lived smile you managed before it disappeared. it was like you went with it. part of you, at least.

as much as eddie wanted to know what happened, he didn't risk asking. and he wouldn't pry until you were at least really here.

"a—are you hungry or something, [y/n]? i might have something in the cabinet. or we can order some, uh, delivery, i'm sure there's... some place that's open."

well, that was a bold-faced lie, it was nearly three in the morning. of course there wasn't.

you were, without a doubt, hungry, but you couldn't eat. you didn't even want to try because, without a doubt, your stomach would reject it. you couldn't deal with that, too, so you shook your head slightly. very quietly, you mumbled, "i can't eat right now."

eddie nodded. "yeah. no, that's—that's fine. i don't blame you."

the more silence you heard, the worse you felt. it was like you were slipping off the edge of a cliff in your head, like you couldn't think, like you didn't even have memories that you could recall. the expression you bore was harrowing, even if eddie couldn't look at you head-on. your eyes were wide but glazed over, staring at a single point in space, like if you looked away it would hurt. in a way, that was the truth. you were statuesque because this was the only position that didn't hurt. you were terrified to feel that pain, because if anything was going to make you remember, it would be the pain.

you looked like you'd watched yourself die. and you looked like you were too scared to mourn.

"ca-" you cut yourself off, swallowing back a cry, harshly rubbing away the forming tears. "can we watch a movie? or something? i-i... i can't stand the silence." you forced a laugh. as much as you wanted it to, it didn't lighten the mood. it didn't make it worse, either. that came as a well-needed relief.

"of course we can, rockstar." eddie was relieved to see your eyes refocus. "wha'd'you wanna watch?"

another little smile twitched at the corners of your lips. "e.t.?"

"e.t. it is, my friend." the warmth in his voice made you feel better. you'd already felt safer than ever just being around him. you were perhaps unworthy of his attention after what happened, and why exactly it had happened. but you were lucky enough to have him in the first place, and it didn't seem like you would ever be rid of him. what a grand thought that was. he left your side for just a second to set up the movie, and this time, the silence didn't give you a death sentence. your mind was free of thought but your body was not free of decay.

this was the beginning of the end. that's what it felt like. and no movies were gonna safe you from it, but it wouldn't hurt to try.

[marionscriptions]

interlaced distance

desc even though you promised me that we would always be friends...

characters anzu, gn!reader (no pronouns used, save for 'you'), mentions of a few of the engirls 3rd years, transfer student-kun (anzu's younger brother) is also mentioned.

warnings some spoilers for the engirls story 'paradise'. reader attends kimisaki (AU where kimisaki is already co-ed, so this fic is not really canon-compliant). some (possible) ooc-ness. cussing.

notations anzu fic (Jaw Drop). i got this idea while waiting for my hair to dry and RAN to write it. i also do not know kimisaki's layout very well, so i apologize if i make a mistake with any details about the school...

She slipped through your fingers faster than you could fathom. One second, you were together, you, Anzu, and Suzu, ditching your classes in favor of escaping to the rooftop of Kimisaki. The next?

She was gone. The tea ceremony clubroom felt emptier than ever, with only Itoh and a few others occupying it. You stopped showing up altogether, the atmosphere too heavy for you to bear.

...But could you truly blame her for leaving? After everything that your peers did... you surely would have done the same. You could tell that she was cracking, slowly but surely. The taunting took its toll on her, weighing her down, drowning her until she asphyxiated.

You tried to reach out to her, you really did. Your hand outstretched, desperate for her to just grab onto it, to take your hand... you wanted her to tell you that she'd be back soon, or that you'd be in the same class again, just like last year, that her disappearance from school was merely temporary.

However...

It wasn't enough. Never. Your dear friend disappeared, as if she were a ghost rather than a human.

Her younger brother would answer the door everytime you tried to visit her. The same routine ensued every single time. He would greet you politely, ask if you were here for "big sis Anzu", and then call for her, only to receive no response.

...You absolutely hated it.

Even Suzu seemingly gave up on visiting by the time that early spring rolled around, pouring her feelings into music via the light music club instead of dwelling.

You wondered, was it worth it to stay at Kimisaki, when you and your friends of last year have drifted so far apart that you were practically strangers by now? Why stay at a school where change would never come, where the same stiff, unchanging protocol would be enforced? The school that practically killed your friend... would it truly be worth it to stay?

...It's pointless to be stuck on it, you reprimanded yourself. After all, spending your morning reminicising what could've been or should've been wouldn't help you get ready for school, would it?

The blue blazer clung to your skin as you fumbled with your (also blue) tie, attempting to put it on correctly. Grabbing your school bag, you set off for school, just like usual.

On your way to school, you picked up breakfast from a nearby convenience store, eating it as you continued your walk. Your footsteps came to a sudden pause as you were met with the sight of a school building, bright pink flowers fencing the outskirts. In the vast sea of people, (E/C) eyes locked with red and yellow ones.

So much for forgetting.

...Breaking eye contact, you continued your walk, praying that she didn't recognise or notice that you were there. It was a foolish wish of yours, for the way that Suzu "the Fallen Angel" looked at you told you enough. The lump in your throat refused to subside, yet you tried and tried to push it down. Stop it.

Another school building came into view after a while. Similarly to the school of pink-tinged buildings and flowers, this school was surrounded by plants, with greenery gating the perimeter. A school where dreams bloom, the informational pamphlet claimed.

"Here we are, (name)." you exhaled shakily. The buildings towered over you, almost intimidatingly so. Compared to last year, this school was much bigger.

"New school, new me" is what you wanted to believe. You truly wanted to think that this school would truly make your dreams bloom.

No rebellion, no rooftop-shared secrets, no bunny outfits, no self-proclaimed 'troublemakers', no moments in the tea ceremony clubroom that would make you dizzily flustered to just think about... A clean slate, one where you are a stranger to others rather than a troublemaker, a freak.

A familiar head of brown hair in the crowd around the gate caught your eye immediately, and it was as if the world stopped its rotating for just a split second.

"Anzu...?"

Blue eyes met yours upon hearing her name. You were.. beyond words, to put it simply. Why did it hurt so much, to encounter her yet again? You looked forward to seeing her again. No, you practically would've given up anything to encounter her again. Yet...

"(name)?"

You felt such conflicting emotions. On one hand, you just wanted to scream and cry, but on the other...

"I'm so sorry."

"...There's no need to apologize," Anzu reassured. "It was my fault, not your—"

"Bullshit," you interjected. "That's bullshit, I should've tried harder... I should've done something. If I had, then you..."

Taking a deep breath to collect yourself (and to prevent the waterworks from starting up), you averted your eyes from hers, blue eyes that seemed haunted, overflowing with regret. "I... tried visiting you, y'know. Your brother would answer the door instead."

"..." Anzu didn't respond, instead opting to focus on the ground. A few pebbles were scattered around the sidewalk.

"I just..." You definitely wanted to cry now. What would you even say? Your brain fumbled around for any sort of response, any other kind of action to convey your tangled mess of feelings, ultimately settling on a, "Nevermind."

The silence that followed was thick with tension. You hated it.

"Big sis, I'm gonna head o—" A familiar face came into view, another head of brown hair that you grew accustomed to seeing over the past few months.

"Ah, you're her friend, right?" the boy in front of the two of you asked. You nodded.

"Yeah. You're... Anzu's little brother, right?"

"Mhm." The boy confirmed, turning to face Anzu. "Hey, big sis, I'm leaving now. See ya later."

"Wait, you forgot your—" Before Anzu could even finish her sentence, her little brother was already off, walking away swiftly.

You supposed that they too were drifting apart from each other, although you refrained from commenting on it.

"Well..." she spoke up afterwards, eyes finally meeting yours (albeit nervously). "I should probably... head to the counsellor's office. To pick up my schedule, that is."

"Y-Yeah. I should head to the general course building. Maybe I'll see you around," you answered, looking in the aforementioned building's direction.

"Mm. See you around... (nickname)."

She was gone once more, the scent of apricots thick on you after your encounter. Swallowing your emotions down, you took the crumpled-up pamphlet out from your school bag, taking in the detailed illustration of the school building.

"Yu-me-no-sa-ki..." you read. "A school where dreams bloom..."

Perhaps it was your childish dream of reconciliation speaking, but in that moment, you believed the school's motto. Maybe, just maybe... she would take your hand this year. Perhaps, you would be able to catch up to her.

[nolspreid]

Jonah Simms relationship hc's time cause i love him, he's criminally underrated (so is the show superstore it's amazing) and i have so many hc's (might be ooc but who cares really)

(also didn't proof read once again, sorry for the mistakes and bad grammar im borderline illiterate sometimes)

<>

as friends

as the show already established, the man starves appreciation and approval, which he will eventually get from you after many failed attempts at breaking the ice.

after you start spending time with him, you discover that he's kind, gentle, always willing and eager to help. at first it's a bit unnerving cause it's not common to meet people like that (plus he can be a little too naive and delusional sometimes) but you eventually get used to it. you even come to really appreciate it. you find it cute the way he sometimes stutters and fumbles over his words when explaining concepts and ideas. his clumsiness and tendency to dig his grave in basically every conversation is really funny to witness.

every time you need help with anything, he's always breaking his back and doing his best to fulfill your needs. he gives you lifts when you need to go somewhere far away, if he notices that you haven't eaten in a while (which happens quite often), he will either save you a piece of whatever he's eating or will go to the extent of buying you something to eat etc...

in return for all his kindness, you started doing the same thing for him. helping him, listening to his little rants about dubious health articles or obscure foreign films and whatnot, just making sure that he's okay. when he first noticed the slow shift in your behavior, he thought that it was really sweet of you.

you both became really devoted and committed to the (for now) platonic friendship overtime. you called each other very often, you hung out all the time in the store and then outside, you knew basically everything about each other atp. you enjoyed one another's company very much.

when everything changed

he fell for you first. he always found you beautiful, like, ever since he saw you for the first time but he didn't think too much about it - or rather tried to - until you guys went to the movies one day. it was one of your first hangout outside the store and in the middle of the day. usually you guys went places after your shifts so you were both relatively tired and not really dressed to the max. but this time was different. you agreed to meet each other in front of the movie theater in the early afternoon. you hadn't had an occasion to dress up in a while so you decided to do so today. you put on a little bit of makeup and your favorite floral dress with some white sneakers and your tote bag. you arrived a bit after him and when he saw you, something inside of him set up on fire. it was like he was seeing you again for the first time. all he could say was "wow. you look great !" or "you really look beautiful" and he did so while looking at you straight in the eyes. ever since that moment, he became more aware of you, of your presence and of your closeness. he now noticed all the little and subtle touches and glances you guys exchanged. he became flustered at every time you brushed past him or took his hand.

at first, he didn't want to believe it but when you hug him one time at the end of the day for a thing that he helped you with, it hit him. he liked since day one. he was only lying to himself all this time.

that realisation was painful but also eye-opening. all those times when he looked at you when you were doing something else or smiling at him and when felt funny inside, he could finally put a name on it. it was admiration and love.

for you it came later, but hit you just as hard. it happened while you guys were hiding in the back to take a little break from a hot day of work. you noticed how he was fidgeting and playing with his hands and fingers. you remembered that he always did and that it was one of the first things you noticed about him. oftentimes you openly stared at his hands and fingers while he was talking to you and moving them. you found them absolutely fascinating and also, pretty. so this day, you decided to tell him. you told him you liked what he was doing with his hands all the time and that you found them really pretty. that's when he looked up at you, with an almost earnest face and a strange light was dancing in his eyes. you didn't know if it was happiness, confusion or something else but it caught your attention. he held up his gaze and looked straight into your eyes, you felt like he was undressing you or rather looked inside of you. that's when you took the opportunity to study the fine features of his face, the deep hazel of his eyes and the plumpiness of his lips. he really is pretty, you thought. there was a few seconds of silence, during which you could feel the tension building up between the two of you. "really ?" he finally answered, his voice surprisingly more sultry than usual and a faint blush making it's appearance on his cheeks and ears, or so you thought. you simply nodded yes, too focused on him to talk. "well, thank you." he just answered before turning his back to you and leaving you rather dumbfounded. what happened was almost surreal to you.

and just like him, ever since, you became aware of his presence and of his closeness. it was like your whole world had collapsed and you now saw him as someone that you wanted. someone whose beauty and attractiveness cause your body to react.

living together

when the tornado hit and he lost his home, you immediately asked him if he wanted to live with you. your apparemment was rather spacious, you could use a little help with the rent and above all else, you couldn't leave him to live in a trailer with an insufferable neighbor when you had the possibility to help him. at first, he didn't want to move in with you, because of his growing feelings for you which made him scared of ruining your friendship and thus losing you. he also didn't want to impose.

you thought it was adorable that he worried about such things when his situation was so difficult. you assured him that he wouldn't impose at all, that he was not a burden despite him seemingly thinking so, and that it would be your pleasure to help him after all that he's done for you. that's when he finally gave in and moved in with you.

at first, it was a bit awkward, especially with your feelings for him and everything. you made sure to avoid any contact, because you feared the same thing as him. you didn't want to lose him and since you were sure that your feelings weren't reciprocated, you limited physical interaction.

jonah did the same and honestly, it hurt him a bit. even if you guys were talking and laughing as usual, he missed the touch of your skin on his and the shivers it sent down his spine everytime.

aside from that, you guys lived well together. you had a cleaning and grocery buying planning. he always insisted on cooking and basically doing everything to make your life easier. when he did so, it would put a huge smile on his face which would cause the same to you. seeing him so happy made you feel all kinds of warm inside.

first kiss

it happened on a random evening. you guys were exhausted after working all day and decided to watch a movie before going to bed. it was a long german movie with an incomprehensible plot, just like jonah liked them. during the film, while he was focused on what was happening on the screen, you were mostly in your thoughts. you were debating whether or not confessing to him today, which btw, you wouldn't have been thinking if you hadn't had a little beer at the end of your shift. it was the end of the week, and you were feeling adventurous, and also a but tired of keeping your feelings to yourself while he was literally living in your apartment. you had had enough of it. everything reminded you of him and his lingering coconut and fresh linen scent was everywhere. you couldn't avoid him so you decided to get on with it.

so you put your head on his shoulder.you couldn't feel it but he shivered at your touch against him. he carefully adverted his eyes to your eyes, confused and also a bit happy. since he couldn't see them, he assumed that you were sleeping hence why you inadvertently touched him, after all this time. tbh, he missed it.

when the film ended, as he was about to grab the remote to turn off the tv, you called his name. he realised that you weren't sleeping at all and turned his head to you.

"can i tell you something ?" you stared right in his eyes, determined to get this over with. even if you knew that he would for sure tell that he didn't feel the same and that it would be super awkward afterwards, you weren't going to stop.

"yeah, sure. go ahead."

"this isn't easy for me to say, and it took me some time to admit but... i think i like you."

his eyes widened and his mouth slightly opened. he was shocked. you went on.

"i realized it a few months ago and i didn't want to tell you because i was afraid it would ruin our relationship." you began to explain with tears forming in your eyes. you didn't think it would be this hard to be honest with him and you had started to get overwhelmed. "but yeah the thing is, i really really like you, jonah. and i know that you probably don't feel the same and that im making everything super awkward but-"

that's when he shut you up with a kiss. it was sweet, gentle, almost innocent. his hands were cupping your face and touching your burning cheeks while his lips chastely planted themselves onto yours. after a few milliseconds of shock where you were processing what just happened, you closed your eyes, savouring the moment.

then he pulled back and looked at your teary eyes in between his hands.

"i like you too, you know. i have for quite some time now."

and that had been the official beginning of your relationship.

[alycosworld]

Tainted

Scaramouche X Reader

WARNING: mentions of (nearly) sexual assault

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A/N: I seem to have more angst/comfort ideas for genshin but I'm not sure why...also, I'm on holiday in a foreign country! I have no work and I'll probably spend all my nights on Tumblr after exploring the city in the day, so please please please send in some requests! I'm bored and although they might take some time, they might help me get back into writing more regularly. I'm pretty sure this is gender neutral but if I made a mistake, feel free to tell me. This has NOT been checked for any errors (I'll get around to it at some point).

I'm not sure if Scaramouche is ooc, since he doesn't say anything that nice in the game or in any official works, but I definitely think he has the capacity for it. And I like soft Scar <3.

If at any point you feel uncomfortable, PLEASE DO NOT READ ON. I felt a little icky after writing the assault bit so do not force yourself to read any further or read at all. I do not want to make anyone reading this unhappy. Any victims of sexual assault or harassment, I hope you heal

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Keep walking. Just keep walking. Get home as fast as possible.

Avoid dark spots, avoid all people, avoid secluded areas. Just get home now.

That's what you told yourself after it happened. Archons, you didn't even know how you should feel. Ashamed? Angry? Disgusted? Upset? Confused? Afraid? The amalgamation of these emotions just made everything worse. You felt sick to your stomach. You wanted to cry and scream and vomit and disappear all at the same time.

You felt like you were covered in grime and you don't even know how you managed to get away. You should've done something, anything! But in the moment, you couldn't.

Your day had started normally. You went to the Adventurer's Guild in Inazuma, doing your commissions and taking up a few extra quests to help people out. Even though you were walking home later than normal, you didn't think much of it. Until somehow, you lost your way. In the dark, things became a little more vague and confusing, so you ended up taking a left and ending up in a dark alleyway between two dimly lit buildings.

You walked through, lost in your own thoughts, until you heard some chuckling and some incoherent remarks made by someone exiting one of the buildings out a back door and into the alleyway.

Glancing up, you saw that the person was a man - quite tall and well built with flushed cheeks: he was clearly not sober. You paid him no mind, staring at the ground as you continue to walk, determined to get home to see your boyfriend, Scaramouche. Though he wasn't one to worry, knowing that you could handle yourself, you did want to see him as soon as possible.

"Well, what do we have here?" The man asked, and you looked up at him again, tilting your head in confusion but staying silent.

"What's a pretty thing like you doing out here all alone?" He asked, a suspicious smirk on his face.

"I'm going home." You said firmly, not wanting to give him any ideas.

"Oh? A handsome young thing like you, going home all by themselves? Let me walk you, I promise I don't bite." He continued, clearly not getting the hint.

"I'm alright, but thank you for the off--"

"Stop being such a fucking tease! Wearing an outfit like that, you're begging for it." He pinned you against the wall despite your attempt to politely refuse any moves he tried to make. He caught your arms above your head and harshly shoved one of his legs between yours.

"Don't like to me, hon, you know you want this." He whispered huskily. You had fought countless hilichurls, abyss mages and monsters far more intimidating and dangerous than that man that day, but you couldn't seem to move. All you could manage was a fearful 'please, don't do this'. Struggling was futile, for some reason you couldn't escape his grasp. You had fought beasts ten times this man's size but violating you like this? It made you break.

He gripped you harshly and even managed to kiss your neck a couple times, making the tears stream down your face uncontrollably, until he heard some voices. You recognised them immediately: members of the Adventurer's Guild. He must be known it too because he stopped as soon as he heard, offering you a sickening grin and scuttling away before you could react.

"We'll finish this some other time, sweetheart. I promise."

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

You didn't get any help from the Adventurer's Guild members who you heard, instead opting to rush home as soon as possible, trying to figure out what to do next.

The only solution in your mind was to crawl into your lover's arms and tell him what had happened. You didn't want anyone else to know - you know you could trust Scaramouche and you knew he would help you.

But he didn't.

You got home and wiped your tears before entering the house, hoping to look somewhat presentable despite having experienced such an impactful event. You dropped your belongings carelessly, not flinging at the loud sound they made as they hit the floor. You immediately made your way to the guest room Scaramouche had turned into an office of sorts, for him to work on Fatui business. The bedroom door was open and empty and he was nowhere to be found on the first floor, so that was the only other place he could've been. You were relieved to see him sitting at the desk, deep in thought with some maps and other sheets of paper laid out in front of him.

"Scar, I--"

"Not now, (Y/N), I'm busy." He said hot even bothering to look up at your frazzled and shattered state.

"I know but, please, Scar. While I was--"

"If you know that I'm busy, why enter in the first place? I'm working. Leave me alone." He said harshly. You didn't say anything, instead opting to nod silently and close the door. Since this was the first time you had experienced this pain and discomfort from being touched and defiled in such a way, you decided that maybe you should put it aside. After all, maybe it was something so jarring. Maybe it didn't matter. Maybe Scaramouche's nonchalance was justified. In a twisted way, you blamed yourself for overreacting and decided to just forget about the incident. If it didn't mean enough for Scaramouche to even look at you, it clearly wasn't something worth fretting over. You were just exaggerating, right?

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

You tried you absolute hardest not to let the incident bother you, but you unknowingly started changing your habits to prevent what had occurred from happening to you again.

"Wearing an outfit like that, you're begging for it..."

You started wearing less revealing clothing, going as far as wearing gloves at some point and covering your neck with collars and scarves through the hot weather.

"We'll finish this some other time, sweetheart. I promise."

Initially, you just avoided dark or secluded places, even when you were with other people, but eventually, you were too scared to leave home at all. You didn't leave the confines of your small garden and if someone passed by, you would quickly hide yourself away. When Scaramouche had unknown guests and colleagues over, you would hide in your bedroom and make him promise not to mention you or acknowledge your existence in the slightest.

You even started taking longer showers and refused to bathe with Scaramouche, confusing him since you used to enjoy it so much. But you wouldn't let him see you in such a vulnerable state now that you were contaminated. You didn't want him to know that you had been tarnished in such a vulgar way, and you spent long moments scrubbing at the parts the stranger had touched. You were worried that Scaramouche would blame you for being assaulted - because in a sick way you thought it was your fault, despite having been nothing wrong. You had twisted the story in your mind to make it seem like you were responsible for the crime committed against you.

Eventually, Childe had to visit for business purposes, but you had become good friends with the eleventh Fatui Harbinger since he was friends with-- well, he and Scaramouche had a relationship, to say the least.

"So where's (Y/N)? Normally they're all over you and making you as embarrassed at possible." Childs grinned, and Scaramouche just frowned and narrowed his eyes.

"They're in our room. They don't really want to see anyone right now." Scaramouche said. Even though you told him not to mention you anymore, since you were so hellbent on avoiding all human interaction, he thought it would be okay to tell Childe. He was your friend too, after all.

"Is something wrong? What happened?" Childe asked, concern in his eyes.

"I don't know. They've been avoiding everyone, including me. They barely talk to me and insist on sleeping downstairs." Scaramouche confessed.

"Let me talk to them."

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Childe exited your room after hearing what to had to say, and he was disturbed and sympathetic, at the very least. Scaramouche saw his wide-eyed, grim expression when he exited the room and immediately had questions.

"What?" Scaramouche asked.

"I'll come back tomorrow to continue our work." Childs said, referring to the business he originally came for.

"But we have to--"

"Scar?" Scaramouche stopped all his trains of thought and turned to the sound of your voice. It was hoarse but still as beautiful as ever. He knew you had been crying from your puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks.

"I think you have other matters to take care of." Childe winked, before giving Scaramouche an informal two-fingered salute and showing himself out.

As soon as the door closed, Scaramouche turned his attention to you, not coming too close in case you didn't want to be near him.

"Yes, Love?" He asked, more concerned than you had ever seen him.

"Can I talk to you? If you're busy, that's okay, it's not that impor--"

"I'm not busy." He shook his head, and you offered him a sad and grateful smile before sitting on the edge of the bed while he took a seat on a nearby chair.

"So, uhm, a couple of days ago I was walking home and I kind of got lost...so I tried taking this alleyway and--" You stopped yourself, meeting Scaramouche's attentive gaze before continuing.

"There was a guy. And he-- he t-touched me. I-- I didn't know what to do. I could've easily fought back but I just got scared and froze up because that's never happened to me before and he kept saying that I wanted him-- but I didn't! I swear, I didn't. I know it sounds bad since I didn't stop him but I really tried, I just couldn't. And he started k-kissing me...here," You gestured to the spots on your neck that you could still feel being violated.

"And I felt so horrible and he didn't go any further because some people were coming, so I ran home. I-I...I didn't know what to do but I felt like I should tell you because I thought you would help me, but you said you were busy so I just-- It-tried to brush it off but I just couldn't get it out of my head! And before I got away, he told me that he'd come back and finish me off and so I didn't want to go outside anymore in case I ran into him. And I started to cover up since he said I was asking for it because of what I was wearing and then I just got scared and I felt dirty. I tried so hard to forget and clean myself but it kept coming back-- I can still feel him on me! I hated it, I still hated it! You have to believe me, I wasn't trying to get him to notice me, I just..." You broke down after finishing what you had to say. You had already been crying since you told Childe, but now you were choking out sobs and your face was drenched. Scaramouche stood up from his chair and sat next to you on the bed, a safe distance away just in case you still weren't comfortable with being touched.

"I believe you. I know you're not like that." Scarsmocuhe started calmly. In all honesty, he wanted to interrupt you as soon as you said that this man approached you. His blood was boiling and he was ready to murder this man for you but kept himself in check because you didn't need senseless violence or revenge right now, you needed comfort. What hurt him the most was that you were blaming yourself because he didn't bother listening to what you had to say on what was probably the worst day of your life.

"It's not your fault you were touched like that. You are not to blame, at all. I-- I should've listened to you when you came to me - as soon as I turned you say I thought something was wrong but I didn't bother asking about it. That's entirely my fault." He admitted, which surprised you. It took Scaramouche a lot to admit his mistakes, but for you? He didn't care. You constantly put up with his sour attitude, he can definitely listen to you and admit he was wrong.

"You sure? Because I still--"

"I'm sure." He said simply.

"But why did you start avoiding me?" He asked, wanting to understand the situation entirely.

"Well, because..." You started, unsure if he would get angry if you told him. While you were contemplating, he offered you an encouraging expression. It wasn't a smile, but it was more than enough to put you at ease.

"I didn't want you to think I was tainted. Of course, you wouldn't want to be near me after that had happened." You sighed, wiping up the last of your tears.

"You really are an idiot, you know?" He said, but after seeing the clueless and almost hurt look on your face, he immediately wanted to take it back. He didn't mean to be insensitive, he just...well, he often explained positive emotions with his very wide negative vocabulary.

"No, I didn't-- uhm..." He mentally cursed himself for not knowing what to say, but you didn't interrupt him and made a small gesture for him to keep going.

"What I mean to say was, I don't think that you're tainted or anything like that. And I still...want to be...near you-- eugh!" He pretended to be grossed out at his own words in true Scaramouche fashion, but he knew you knew he didn't really mean it and was beyond delighted when he saw you giggle at his facial expression.

He sighed and acted angry as he opened his arms ever so slightly. You noticed the movement and quirked an eyebrow when he hesitated.

"Is it okay if I come closer?" Scaramouche asked, unsure if you wanted to be touched after the incident.

Your heart swelled at his care and then you slowly watched as he stiffly wrapped his arms around you comfortingly. Although you had hugged and cuddled on countless occasions, he still wouldn't stop being so robotic unless you did something. It made you laugh and he pulled away slightly to glare at you, so you decided to just pull him back in and hug back.

And when you relished in the touch of another human being, the touch of the person you love, you began to cry. The last time anyone willingly touched you was in that alleyway, and so to have someone be so gentle with you and have no bad intentions, you were overwhelmed with emotion.

Scaramouche must've felt your tears staining his clothing and skin, and quickly pulled away with poorly hidden concern in his eyes.

"Are you okay?" He asked, but you just continued to sob and nod.

"I love you!" You choked out. He sighed and gently patted your back.

"I...love you too." He said, before making another expression of mock disgust. He slowly moved to hold both your wrists in his hand and kiss down to your neck, pulling you into his lap with your legs straddling one of his.

You soon realised that he was covering up the placed the stranger had touched you with his own ministrations, effectively replacing the grime you felt you gained after the incident. After you came to that conclusion and Scaramouche was done, he didn't meet your eye, blushing profusely. It was justified since he didn't usually initiate any kind of affection acts, but you just cupped his jaw and kissed his cheek, smiiling at him with purity and a newfound confidence in the both of you.

"Thank you, Scar."

[dorimena]

☆(ゝω·)𝚟 🥁

𝙶𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚘'𝚜 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔

𝙷𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚘𝚘 𝙸'𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 (๑꒦ິ ̼ ꒦ິ๑)

𝙸 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚟𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚍 𝚊 𝚗𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚍𝚊𝚢 𝚜𝚘 𝚏𝚊𝚛

𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚜𝚊𝚒𝚍,

𝚃𝚘𝚍𝚘𝚛𝚘𝚔𝚒 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚝'𝚕𝚕 𝚋𝚎 𝚜𝚒𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚘𝚖 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚐𝚒𝚛𝚕𝚜 𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚖𝚎𝚝 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚞𝚋𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚟𝚎

𝙾𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚘 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚢 𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚞𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚕 𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚊𝚗'𝚝 𝚌𝚞𝚖 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎

-🧸 ٩( ᐛ )و

Ohmygodifyouwould’veheardmyfuckingscreamofjoy-

Hi hello oh my god welcome back!!! (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)

I missed you so much and I am now asdfghjk I had a troubling week, a group for a course decided not to cooperate until like… a few hours ago before the deadline so-

Onwards with your confession huhuhu~ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

𝔰𝔦𝔡𝔢𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢; I think this came out rather silly, and Shoto might've come out a bit ooc. Most importantly, I hope I didn't end up offending someone. And if I did, I am so sorry! Please tell me!

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰; slight sexist themes, implied multiple orgasms, overstimulation, drool, dumbification, slight unintentional possessive theme, kinda crazy ex-girlfriends, implied pegging but I tried my best to keep this gender-neutral, not proofread

Shoto’s a gentleman, or as much of a gentleman he’s learned to be growing up. One thing that’s always stuck to him, whether from how the media would show it, how the TV shows he managed to watch showed it, or how his classmates would talk about it, is that girls lean to be quite submissive.

At first he had denied this, not accepting it as a fact until he experienced it himself. And lo and behold, every single girlfriend before you easily submitted and spread their legs for him- okay that sounds really bad. But if he wanted to be blown, they would drop to their knees in a heartbeat.

And it’s unclear to this day whether it’s because of who he is or out of genuine love for him, but one thing that’s always usual with every breakup is how they would leave trying to victimize themselves, trying to make themselves feel better by bashing the new girlfriend after them, even if they’re the ones to end the relationship because of how Shoto fucks them.

Yeah… it confused you.

So when you came along, you kind of met the same fate as every other ex-girlfriend: get found by the ex, harassed on DMs and then bashed by the way you look with how they manage to find you publicly.

But instead of you breaking up with Shoto or trying to force him to prove to you, through sex, how much he loves you, you simply figured a way out to have them stop bothering you, and watching one of the ex-girlfriends be escorted by the police out of the restaurant seemed to be the red flag for the others to basically stop.

Shows how pathetic they kind of are, thinking that pulling you down would help raise their ego up just because they can’t accept Shoto didn’t like them anymore.

But then we have a new problem: Shoto thinking you’d still submit to him and wondering if the reason why he can’t keep a relationship is because of his ‘lack of experience’.

When you guys were going to finally get intimate beyond the occasional oral sex or sensual touching, you guys had a conversation about how it would go, considering it took a while for you to tell Shoto you’re dominant in bed and for him to voice out how amazing you were in putting his ex girlfriends ‘in their place’ so easily. No, not in a sexist way, more in a ‘karma got back at you, bitch’ sort of way.

Shoto might’ve laughed a bit when you asked him if he’d like to be pegged, dismissing the idea at first until he decided that maybe he’ll see if you’re truly dominant like you said.

And boy was he in for a ride.

He’s always done the prepping, the consoling, the praising, the fucking, the thrusting, the groaning.

But to finally be the one prepped, consoled, praised, fucked, thrusted into and hear someone else groaning into his ear had him cum not even a few minutes since you began.

It had him feel like a complete virgin again, and he was dying of embarrassment, face red as he stared wide-eyed at you, mouth opened in surprise while his orgasm rode out.

You giggled and told him this isn’t over until you say it is, reminding him about the safe word and safe cues before slowly picking up speed with your thrusts.

With each and every single one of them, he squeaks out a little, body still on overdrive as he’s trying to process this feeling, the tingly sensation starting from his ass that spreads all around his body down to his toes, making his thighs shake on either side of your body.

Your moaning is enough encouragement to let himself let out all of his cute noises, from small, squeaky whines to airy, high-pitched moans of your name, repeating itself like a broken record.

You guys do it missionary at first before you flip him onto his hands and knees. Doggy style somehow managed to turn Shoto more into a cockwhore than what you expected, as it allowed him to pick up leverage to fuck back and meet your hips.

If the skin slapping from before was loud enough to echo around the room as the bass to your fucking, than the way it sounds now must’ve alarmed the neighbours about what you guys are doing on a random Wednesday night.

His teeth are biting and tugging at the bedsheets, a puddle of drool reaching his squished cheek as he tries warning you how he’s about to cum, his hips suddenly controlling the tempo. You somehow angle your hips a certain way so you aren’t teasing his prostate into overstimulation, driving him to his orgasm as he mewls anything coherent that his mind can come up with.

And even if you guys aren’t done yet, not with how he’s dumbly chasing for more friction while grinding onto the bedsheets, he finally, somehow, came to realize that he was never incompetent or a lazy lover.

He just… isn’t a dom like he thought he was.

He loves fucking the person he loves, but now, he very much loves being fucked by the person he loves.

Good job, you did it. You’ve ruined anyone else’s shot at fucking Shoto Todoroki. But you’d be a fool to break up with him, because this baby boy won’t let you go.

[yukisnowywriting]

I Will Always Be With You, Promise.

Karatachi Kagura x y/n

masterlist

genre : angst, hurt/comfort, fluff.

warning : suicidal, depression, all that dark stuff

a/n : ayeeeee im back ayeee (no one probably cares but ayeeeee). this is quite OOC cuz my mans got no enough screentime and I just made this to comfort myself with some imaginations so yeah... Enjoy! (i swear theres so little fanfic of kaguraxreader)

I dont know kaguras age so lets just imagine hes 15 (ah... young love)

(btw u could change the chara u imagine if u dont like him or dont know kagura)

---

Being a rare child thats more smarter and talented than other people in kirigakure was a very great thing, the adults respect you, the mizukage knows of your well being, and its easier to win some quiz or test while ending up number one. A dream like life, atleast for everyone else. For y/n, the expectation of being number one burdens you too much. Especially for you who was still turning into a teenager.

The burden was too much until when you end up number one again, you stopped feeling happy nor proud. Y/n only wanted to spend atleast her teen years with friends your age and having fun.

ah right... you dont have friends your age (typical y/n, sad that im really like this). You only managed to talk to Kagura, well hes only 2 years older... eventhough you feel like hes avoiding you, maybe he hates you too.

guess you have nobody

---

Kagura POV

..."why is she so cute" (simp-)

Getting to introduce myself and to talk with y/n was the best mistake Ive made. Sad that we dont spend time that much. My heart races too much whenever I talk to her, this is bad for my health.

The way she smiles, walks, runs, everything she does makes my heart flutter...

we've know each other for two years, but it feels like theres a barrier between us that she made, always one step closer and two steps back.

i look at her from afar every time i get a chance to, i feel like im obsessed, but just seeing her blink makes me fall in love all over again.

i feel like at this point i know almost all her cute habits, what is she probably doing at the second, and many more. I wonder if I should... get closer to her.

maybe starting next week. i dont have any schedule next week anyways, and neither y/n

end of pov

---

one week later

You were just at your normal spot, a high cliff near the ocean, kirigakure sure has a very great view eventhough being called mist village. But today, life was more tougher on the little details than usual with you, and now when you see the ocean, you think 'how peaceful it is, even thy waves move with big heavy strokes, yet always reflected beautiful and peaceful.' and to get to the point, it felt so peaceful, that you felt like.... being in it will have you in peace.

You take on step to the edge, and another, and more follows as your eyes began to be lost of the people youve cared for.

you may have a little crush on that cute yet powerful blonde, and actually tried to convince yourself that the two of you were similar, you came to conclusion that the two of you are not to be compared. Kagura is way better than you, the gods picked him to support. He is just the same as you, a powerful individual, but not like you, he develops himself fastly, even when no one in the village turn to eye him as a person and not of the forth mizukage bloodline, he still grew into a powerful person to protect. How you envy his mind. How you hated that he could do what you cant. How you hated that you hate him so much but each time he sees you he gives you a smile and a compliment that youve always wanted. How he says "your a very exceptional person, not like what they say, your not just a genius, your also a very lovely person". You hate that everything he does makes you want to breathe another day just to see his smile. You hate that the fact that you will break into tears right now and stop the thing your going to right now if he comes up to you.

Just like right now...

---

As he took every confidence to stand beside you, he walks to your usual spot with the intention of getting more close to you by striking up a conversation and inviting you to spend the day with him.

But the moment he was there, he panicked as he sees you stepping towards the edge abnormally, it looks clear that you were trying to jump, but the waves today were too much for you to go swimming so he knows that whatever you were gonna do, it wasnt gonna be good. He wants to stop you but once he looks at you eyes from afar, he could sense all of your negativity and a little light that whispers your hope of wanting to dissappear from this world. As he stops and stands a few meters behind you, he ask "are you okay?". he seemingly did not catch your attention but know by how you fasten your steps little by little that you were still willing to jump.

He grabs your hand and spins you around, he bends his body a little to meet your eyes with one arm engulfing you in his embrace. "you had a bad day didnt you? do you want to share it with me?" he pulls away giving little space between you and him, as he gives you a warm gentle smile. you just looked down as tears start to escape your eyes, and little sobs break. he once again embraces you and gently tucks your head in his chest. After a few moments, you start to ramble on about what your feeling;

why does it have to be me? why do people carry me oh so high but when i fail, they turn their backs. they appreciate me when Im all correct but even 0.1 mistake can take effect... i dont like this... im still 13, in the last mission, people my age were running around, laughng with their friends. why cant i do that? i dont wanna keep being lcked up in a room reading books, i want to play too! i dont wanna do paperwork everyday! i want to go out relax with friends.... but all im expected to do is- is- learn- win number one- ranked number one- complete missions- and not fail... i dont like this... its to heavy... the pressure is suffocating me... i-i-

I dont wanna die...

she says to the person that embraces her lovingly for the first time. her last sentence was heard to be aa quiver as she continues her quite cries which were never heard before.

Kagura always knew her as a quite yet cheerful person. she brings a big positive energy to thee who is beside her. The moment she introduced herself to him for the first time, her voice was like light that could reassure people of their path and that everythings going to be okay. But he didnt knew that the one in need of the light is the light itself.

He strokes her hair gently as If she was made of glass. And silently snuggles closer to her smaller figure... Then he lets out a soft whisper

"you've went through so much until now. I can't comfort you nor can I help, but for now the only thing i can do is be by your side. We don't talk too much and we don't interact the most, so i think this is too early, but I love you. You did a great job, you've handled so much until this second, you've carried so much until now, even if people are dissatisfied of you, just remember, i will always be proud of you, i will always support you, and i love you"

"you could rest yourself now, even just for a second. Just rest and forget all of the pressure as if it doesn't exist." He continues

"i don't want anyone to hate me- i don't want to disappoint anyone" you wanted to continue but then he says

"even if the world is against you, i will always be by your side. Promise"

----------------------------------------------------------

Everyone has their own bad side, and everyone makes mistakes, this was just a fanfic to comfort myself and also just me ranting. So this whole fanfic is probably to ooc, if u didn't like it, it's okay, if u like it then I'm glad. I don't see much Kaguraxreader fanfics, and i really need some whether in Wattpad or Tumblr or any other apps,

PLEASE FRCKING TELL ME IF YOU KNOW ANY FANFIC OF KAGURAXREADER. I AM DESPERATELY SEARCHING EVERYWHERE DAMMIT- thank you (´；ω；｀)

[gemma-collins-ily]

Hi!! Can I request a fic please! So I was thinking maybe something similar to the scene in the show, where Inej kills for Kaz. So the reader is fairly new to the crows and has been on some heists but nothing involving killing. But for this next heist, Kaz has them go on the Pekkas turf, and they are found by the Dime Lions. Maybe Kaz is about to be killed but the reader shoots the guy and kills him. She is in shock so Kaz says " look at me y/n" to help her regain focus and then comforts her back at the slate? If you can't, don't worry!! Thank you and I love your writing sm!! 💕

Would Be In The End

Kaz Brekker X Reader

a/n - not sure if this is too ooc, I tried to stay true to character but this is quite fluffy! Thank you for the request darling and thank you for the compliment too xoxo 💕

Warnings: killing, strangling, knives, brief mention of alcohol (bourbon) and blood. Let me know if there's anything else, I don't want to trigger anyone at all :)

Tagged: @mrs-brekker15

Excitement was coursing through your veins and you imagined it like a light in your bloodstream, brightening one section at a time as it travelled at a shockingly swift pace through your body.

You were sat in the Crow Club, overseeing Jesper gambling away all he owned. You felt sympathy for him, how easily he had become addicted to the thrill and fallen down a rabbit hole, trying to convince Kaz that it would do no harm.

This brought you to another subject: Kaz. Your feet tapping against the wooden floor slowly became more drawn out as the eagerness fizzled.

What if you had to kill?

Kaz had assured you it probably wouldn't come to that but knowing him like you did, you saw his eye twitch marginally, as it always did when he wasn't so sure of himself.

He would never allow his voice to break or falter, but that twitch told you all you needed to know. You could have to murder someone tonight.

The toe of your shoe began to tap faster once again, but now the source was from nerves; Kaz would bring you into his office soon to go over final plans.

He'd probably become irritated quickly, with the amount of questions Jesper asked it was no surprise. That was why he would constantly call you upstairs an hour or so before you were due to depart.

Jesper never failed to seem as though he had never been at the first meeting, or second, or third. He acted as though he had not heard the plan until now, and then when Kaz had enough, Inej would carefully explain, sighing as she did so.

Then, when the time came for Jesper to shoot and his cue was very obviously displayed, he would wait another minute, like he had no clue what he was supposed to be doing and would later decide to wing it once one of you, the three remaining Crows hissed at him to do his job.

You would always have to improvise after that, Kaz filling you in on Plan D or F, the ones he would devise because he knew of Jesper's tendancy to be late.

Soon, the secondary plans would develop into the prioritised ones, and because Jesper very clearly and obviously zoned out during meetings in which he would assign you jobs, he would improvise and the plan would mostly carry on without a hitch.

You had nudged Jesper often during the most recent heist meeting, trying to get him to actually pay attention so that this would work. You didn't want to have to improvise at all, rather to follow the set out plan to a tee.

You couldn't risk anything.

This was not your first heist with the Crows, but every one's preparation went the same way. You would be majorly joyful for the most of the day, then the slight twist of your stomach that had been underlying the adrenaline would become much more noticeable and prominent.

Nothing else was really that new, as you had already befriended Jesper, Inej and Nina before you officially joined the Crows. Matthias took a bit of time, for you to progress from the likes of complete stranger to 'near friend'.

Whenever asked about it, Nina would be quick to come to your defence saying he was just a little slow to open up.

You had already had waffles with Nina and reading time with Inej and if anyone asked, you wouldn't tell them, but you had also had silent sitting with Kaz.

He would scan over paperwork while you would be enamored by novels, that took you far from the grimy streets of Ketterdam. You wouldn't want to travel anywhere else permanently, because everyone you loved was here but temporarily was a whole other story.

You even loved Matthias, believe it or not, and you knew deep down he cared about you too, as much as he pretended to be disconnected and rude.

A tap on the bar counter brought your attention away from your thoughts and you peered over a pigeon's shoulder to see Kaz, nodding then turning around to march back up the stairs.

It was time.

The feeling of queasiness settled at the bottom of your torso, between your hips and actual stomach. You would usually knock back a bourbon or alcoholic drink if you felt you really needed it, but that was in normal circumstances and now you needed to be sharp and aware.

So you stood and weaved through the crowds, walking up the stairs, Jesper trailing behind you. Inej would already be there, waiting, as she always was.

Jesper gave you a gentle push in the small of your back halfway and after you righted yourself, attempting to avoid a stumble, you fixed your glare upon the sharpshooter.

He shrugged and responded, "You looked like you needed it. Honestly it's like you're trudging to your death."

You turned and practically jogged up the last few stairs, Jesper's words echoing around your skull.

Others might be informed of a family member's death tonight. All because of me.

You shook your head, placed your hand atop the dull, bronze door knob, and rotated your wrist so the door swung open.

Later, in your mind, that was one of the first steps you took to becoming a murderer.

You sprinted down the hallway, making a sharp turn left, approaching a balcony with gilded iron posts, leaf like structures adorning the vertical rods and what seemed to be ivy wrapping over the plainer edges.

It was a dead end.

Kaz had conveniently 'forgotten' that the heist was on Dime Lion territory. In truth, you were aware he had overestimated his abilities and had the opinion he wouldn't be caught there. He was.

No one was chasing you directly yet, but it was only a matter of time and retracing your footsteps to get to an escape route was far too risky.

You had been so caught up in your stress, that you hadn't properly examined the floor plans and building layout and you cursed yourself inwardly.

Mistakes could never be made in Ketterdam: if they were, severe consequences would be given. It was like the butterfly effect - one small wrong move could be your undoing, reversing all the intricate moves made before it.

This mistake could perhaps lead to your ever imminent death.

Subsequently, you were desperate and this meant, that now, there was only one thing you could see as the best option to get out of their territory.

You continued to sprint at the iron, gate-like wall, hoping to get a run up so you could vault over and dash across the huge hall.

It had no cover, and you expected Rollins, or whoever was in charge of this section of turf, would have dismissed the people posted there, assuming because of the disadvantage that you could be easily seen, no one would think to do what you were about to.

And you did go through with it, no matter how horrifying it may have seemed, because this was now a matter of life and death, and a short fall would give a much higher chance of survival.

But you never had the opportunity to run across the hall's open space. Because right there, in front of you, Kaz was on the floor, a Dime Lion pressing his crow cane against his throat.

His eyes were bulging and he was flailing, trying to catch the man, who seemed to have the advantage, off guard. It wasn't working.

This was your worst nightmare. You were in a situation in which you could save him; Kaz, the one who had pulled you from the grasp of the alleyways and winding streets. You could help.

But what would be the cost?

You withdrew a knife, brought your wrist toward you, ready to flick it and end the man's life in one simple move.

One simple move.

Simple.

But it wasn't. That move, the flex of your muscles could kill him. What if he had a family? His children and significant other could be distraught at the end of the night and their suffering would be on you.

It could be interpreted as selfish, but that throw of the knife could mark your soul forever, and you didn't want his blood on your hands.

"Stop!"

He turned, a devilish smirk plastered on his face, but you could see in his eyes he was afraid - anyone who wasn't terrified of dying alone was a madman.

"Hmmm, let me think about that..."

Your hand was ready to throw the dagger, but quavering in its position.

"How about... No!"

His last word was a manic yell as he added yet more pressure to Kaz's cane, Kaz himself beginning to gurgle and his eyes starting to water, the tears streaming over his cheeks and dripping off his jaw.

There was nothing you could do.

That's what Kaz tried to tell you later.

But truth be told, there was always another option. One that didn't involve sending the knife into the Dime Lion's back.

But you didn't take that option.

Instead, you stilled your hand's shaking and watched in horror as the man fell to the floor, your dagger protruding from his flesh, his face downward, to the floor, as blood pooled around him.

You had just killed a man.

Your eyes filled with horror and tears, staring at the limp body and the ever growing amount of blood. Suddenly, it was coming toward your shoes, since he was never that far away and you jumped backwards, almost flinching at the sight.

Of course you had seen injuries before, but death. It made a sickening feeling churn inside you, nibbling at your insides and poisoning you with guilt.

"(Y/N), can you hear me? (Y/N)?"

Kaz was trying to communicate with you, get you to say anything, but then he noticed how your eyes had glazed over and he thought back to all your previous heists together.

Not once had he seen you kill.

His eyes widened and he took a cautionary step towards you. Your eyes flickered to him, finally, and your gaze tore from the corpse on the floor, only to return to it a moment later.

He now knew you were slightly more aware of him and so spoke hoarsely once more, "(Y/N), look at me."

Nothing happened but you had heard him.

"(Y/N), just look at me, okay? It'll make it better. Just look."

You did look at him and forced yourself to keep eye contact, not wanting to see what you had done.

"See, just focus on me. You'll be fine. We're going to get out of here now and go back to the Slat, alright?"

You didn't have much of a choice if you didn't want to be caught, but a small part of you wasn't so sure anymore. Maybe, you deserved it. Maybe, you should have payed for your crime.

But, you did indeed run from the scene, while only a singular tear that had dropped to the floor and the man you had killed remained to show where you had been.

Kaz continued to glance back at you, even through the pathways of the capital of Kerch, where he could be interpreted as soft and losing his touch.

He would keep checking you were okay automatically, even if he had lied before. You weren't going to be fine. Not for a while, at least.

So you carried on back to the Slat, back home, after Inej appeared from the shadows and he notified her you wouldn't be at the meeting spot that night.

As soon as you entered, he ushered you upstairs, cane clicking rythmically behind you as you ascended and the door locking, making sure there was no possible way for you to be disturbed.

Paperwork could wait. He needed you to feel safe and alright again.

He too felt to blame; he had sent you on that heist and you had been hurt because of it. If only he hadn't been so stupid, so blissfully ignorant, acting as though he wasn't on the turf of Pekka, just to prove he could outsmart him.

But he put it aside, all of it - even the ache in his throat and burning of his lungs from his fight before.

Before it all.

He tapped the edge of his bed with the end of his cane, signaling he wanted you to sit and you did with hesitance. You almost felt dirty, now that you had committed such an act the Stadwatch could kill you for.

"(Y/N), I know what you're thinking and you are in no way a monster. It is not possible."

He made sure to enunciate each word, hoping it would show how sincere he was if he couldn't be there for you through touch.

He knew what you were thinking because he too had thought it once, back when he was just a scared little boy, so naive yet so alert to the world's cruelty.

So, when he observed that you were still staring at the ground, eyes unfocused and yet again swimming with unshed tears, he crouched down to a position similar to a squat, the only difference being his bad leg was stretched out and his hand was balancing himself on the floor.

"You did what was necessary, (Y/N). You were forced into doing that," he paused momentarily, "You need to understand, okay? This is not your fault. It wasn't, isn't, and will never be."

You were peeking at him now, feeling a bit better because you were level with his cocoa irises. His words were beginning to sink in, the seriousness in his tone reasurring you.

His voice was softer than usual, coaxing you to believe what he said, but it grew sterner as the sentence went on, trying to convey how true the last few words were.

"Do you believe me?"

You gulped.

It wasn't your fault.

It was.

It wasn't.

Was.

This went on and on until you gave a resigned nod, bobbing your head up and down. You feared to speak, not wanting to dissolve into sobs.

"Say it," at your quizzical stare he continued, "Say it wasn't your fault."

You cleared your throat, cringing at the uncomfortable feeling of phlegm rising.

"It wasn't my fault." You whispered.

He nodded encouragingly - it was a start.

"Say it again but like you mean it." Was his gentle command.

"It wasn't my fault."

Your voice was more determined and resolute this time, with only a waver between the middle two words.

He seemed satisfied and stood, groaning a bit at the movement in his stiff leg. He sat at his desk, rotating his leg carefully so he was sure he wouldn't bend it too much.

"Staying or leaving?"

"Leaving."

"Alright. I'll check on you later."

So you closed the office door, heading to your room to get some sleep. It may have been early, but you really felt like you needed it.

And when you were comfortably tucked in bed, you allowed the tears to fall silently. There was still that small niggling whisp of guiltiness but you repeated Kaz's previous words in your head like a mantra.

It wasn't your fault.

Kaz remained true to his word, and when he opened your door a smidge, he smiled, because even if there were tear stains on your pillow, you were okay.

Okay did not mean happy, but he knew you would be in the end.

And that was all he needed to be sure of.

[doubledgesword-2]

Hello lovely! How pe you’re having a nice weekend!💕

I saw that your requests are open and I was wondering if I could request a head cannon or Drabble of adult trip with a blind darling??

Hope you have a nice day!💕✨

Aww yeeesh! I did have a lovely day and a nice weekend, thank you so much! Here's your nice cup of Rose tea hon, enjoy it!

WARNING TOOTH ROTTING FLUFF AND A LIL BIT OF OOC! ENJOY!

Chrollo

Whether you were born like this or you had an accident that took your sight, it doesn't matter; Chrollo would do everything for you.

And when I say everything, I mean every little thing, from guiding you around the room to bathing you or showering with you to help. 

"Chrollo, I can do it; you don't have to worry" you chuckle nervously as his hand gently scrub your arm; you feel his fingers gently rub the soap on your shoulder, and you're hoping he can't see you blush. 

"Hush, dear, and let me love you" he kisses your shoulder, and you shudder at the feeling of his warm lips against your skin. 

When you casually ask how the clouds look like or what color is the ocean, or what color are the trees this time of the year, his eyes tear up a bit. He looks at you with a drunk love look and a warm smile.

 You're so perfect for him, because him being a romantic, this is the perfect time to be poetic. 

He will find an object that's very soft and very fluffy in texture; his hand will take yours and slowly drag it through the material so you can feel every single fiber of it. 

"That's how clouds are like, love. This time of year, the trees are red, and that's like cinnamon, and the ocean is blue, and aqua and those are like salty blueberries." 

"Ewww!" You laughed, and he chuckled, still holding your hand in his. This moment was a real treasure for him.  

"May I see how You look like?" He immediately tears up. This boi is low key the most sentimental in situations like these ones. He can't help but be overwhelmed. Sure he's a thief, but he's a humble one, albeit unfair on occasions but never with you. 

Chrollo takes your hands and places them on his cheek. Your fingers feel so soft on his skin, almost like you're afraid to damage him. They glide over his nose, feeling how it arches, over his eyebrows and his eyelids. 

Then they pass over the cross on his forehead into his hair, caressing it until your arms are looped around his neck and you hug him close, your ear on his chest listening to his racing heartbeat. 

"You have a strong heart" You can't see how his cheeks are tinted pink or how his breathing has picked up because, dammit, you're amazing at getting these kinds of reactions out of him. 

He will read to you, even though you have learned Braille. He wants you to be drunk on his voice and the passionate way he makes the story's impressions. 

No one, and I mean no one, is allowed to begin a demeaning sentence towards you or some comment about your blindness that makes you uncomfortable. He will shut them up with one look and the flare of his aura.  

When you guys go out, he insists on guiding you even though sometimes you have held him back before a car could run him over because he was too focused on taking care of you. He didn't see the vehicle coming. Ironic. 

"That was a close one, don't you think?" He kissed the crown of your head, holding you close as the two of you kept walking to your destination. "Now, do you believe I can take care of myself?"

"We'll see," he chuckles. 

Illumi 

Your encounter with Illumi is always a tale to tell. 

You see, you were at a coffee shop, drinking your favorite drink and eating a nice treat/pastry when he passed you by dropping one of his pins in the process. He had been so tired and beat that he didn't even notice. First one right there. 

"Excuse me, sir," You bend over and felt for the big round top of the pin until your fingers grasped it and held it tight, minding the other pointy side. "You dropped this" Illumi doesn't say anything in acknowledgment. He simply extends his hand to you. 

But you are not giving him the pin, and this annoys him so much. Then his eyes look up to yours. They are blueish but glazed over and almost white. You're blind. Illumi reaches for your hand, startling you for a quick second, but he picks the pin and lets go. 

"Is this seat taken?" He asks suddenly, and you smile towards his voice.

"Go right ahead." 

That day Illumi was so intrigued by you that he couldn't help but stalk you a bit, you know, for research purposes in case he ever finds an opponent like you. 

But it turns into so much more.

 He meets you every day he can, no matter where he goes with you. He makes no effort to help you, though, and don't expect him to do so. He appreciates you too much, and in his mind, you're like a wild cardinal, and if he were to help you, it's like putting you in a cage. Once he lets you free again, you won't know how to survive on your own. 

He wants you free. He loves you free. 

But that doesn't mean he won't be there for you or step in when circumstances are far too grave for you to handle. 

"Llumi, how does the sky look today?" 

"Gray. It's going to rain" his response makes you chuckle; you have never seen gray, but his honesty makes you smile. You outgrew your frustrations about this situation a long time ago. 

"Can we stay to feel the rain? I want to smell the petrichor once it's over" Illumi looks at you with the same expression he gives everyone. He knows you might catch a cold standing in the rain; he doesn't understand why all you said would be relevant. But then he reminds himself, he has taken for granted all of these things because he can see them. 

"Only a couple of minutes once its starts. If it gets bad, we'll go inside. You can smell the petrichor afterward" he holds your hand, and you two sit there on the park bench. 

Illumi doesn't get cuddly or lovey-dovey with you. Still, he will allow himself moments where he can't help but admire you and be grateful for having you in his life. He will never say that. Ever. But he'll think it.

One time he entered your apartment and found you sitting on the rug in the living room, reading Braile. 

"Illumi is so nice to hear you today. How was your day?" He's always impressed by your ability to sense him. When he asked once how you could recognize him if he was so quiet, you said you could feel his presence in the room since it was calming to you even when he tried to conceal himself. This melted his heart. 

"What are you reading" He came to sit on the sofa, his legs brushing your arms like a loving gesture. Your hand grabbed his leg, squeezing him in recognition, and then went back to the book. 

"Would you like me to read it to you?"

"Yes," It was a lovely evening that day. 

Just like Chrollo, he's very protective of you since his line work makes him kind of famous, some people are bound to have seen you and try to get to you to get to him, and this is where Illumi draws the line. 

Rest assured, no one will touch a single hair on your head if he has his way. The beginning of his bloodlust alone is enough to make everyone panic and turn away.

"Illumi, hon is alright, I'm here, I'm right here. Look at me" you would open the curtain of his luscious hair to hold his face and make him look at you. "I'm fine, see?" 

"They are not worth it," he says after holding you close to him. He'll kill them later. 

Hisoka 

This little shit will always be a little shit, in this case, a loving and understanding one, but still, the point remains. 

You bumped into him on the streets, and the minute it happened, it annoyed him so much. He was in the process of turning and giving you your dues when he noticed you had actually stopped and been grabbing his wrist. 

"I apologize, I'm so sorry" you're not looking at him, and that annoys him even further. 

That's until he notices your vacant look and your body language. You may not be looking at him, but your whole body is poised to listen. Listen to him. 

"Are you blind?" He blurts out but not really; his smirk says it was intentional.

"All my life, sir," you chuckle, letting his wrist go and leaning a bit on your white cane. 

This makes him giggle, and he invites you for a coffee if you're available.

The rest after that marks your relationship. 

Hisoka behaves like a child whenever he's around you. He hides his presence to try and scare you, but you can always sense him. You can even imagine him pouting as you find him and poke him with your cane. 

"Not fair, little fruit." 

"You smell like bubble gum, hon," you chuckle, bringing him down to kiss his cheek. 

He holds you close and loves when you let yourself go and depend on him a little.

 Lke him cooking for you, doing some chores around the house (He doesn't have to, and you tell him that, but he just says you'll have to reward him later), and the two of you baking together—with him covering you in flour as much as he can without you noticing.

"Soka, I know my cheeks and forehead are white; you are a terrible boyfriend, love."

"Mmmmm, so mean, (Y/N)-chan" He kissed you as he puts more flour on your nose. 

Hisoka knows he has to leave for extended periods since he can't stay put in one place plus his job. But will always call you and answer your phone calls no matter if he's fighting with someone at the moment.

 "My precious darling, I *grunts* I'm in the middle of breaking someone's arm at the moment *huffs* can I call you later, love?" You cringe at the sound of the bone-breaking over the phone but chuckle slightly at his antics.

"Yes, you can, Be safe" oh, oh, oh he loves your concern for him. It just makes him moan obscenely in the middle of the fight, making his opponent disgruntled and allowing him to finish them off.

"On second thought, dear, we can talk right now. I'm currently free." 

He will bring you stuff from his travels and jobs, all with different textures and pleasant smells so you can experience them. 

Now this, this is the moment of truth. While you're distracted touching everything he brought, he takes away his texture surprise. Suddenly he lifts your hand to touch his hair, then his face and arms. 

"How does this one feels, mmm?" He hides the fact that he's nervous by being playful, but you can feel him being stiff. 

"It feels soft," then your fingers gingerly brush a big scar over his chest "it feels like no matter what, I love you. Like you can trust me with each one of these" 

He won't admit it, but it's nice that you can't tease him for his blushing cheeks and aghast expression. But he chuckles to alleviate the lump in his throat as he takes your hands in his and pulls you in for a hug. 

When the two of you go out, he's always holding your hand, or you're holding his arm. He has convinced you to not use your white cane while walking with him. He'll be your eyes. 

The moment someone bumps into you…

"Hey, watch where you're going, woman!" 

"Oh, so, so sorry, sir," you apologize, and Hisoka is smiling at the man. 

"Yeah, you better be" 

"Little fruit, do you want to know how fluttering butterflies feel?" As he says so, your face is tickled by a lot of fluttering little wings, and the experience mutes the man's screaming as he Hisoka gently drags you away. 

[guardianofrivendell]

Uh, so I'mma request something because I really like your writing and want more of your wonderful Aragorn fics in my life. So, I was thinking some headcannons about what it would be like to date/be in a relationship with Aragorn before, during and/or after the fellowship? Thanks man, and take as long as you need!💕

A/N: I am STRUGGLING with sleepover requests, my own series (PS and DAKT) and some new stuff so I turned to my stack of ‘normal’ requests to try and write something different. Et voilà!

@katethewriter I took a lot longer than I should have with these and I’m so sorry! I’m leaning more towards the Hobbit era lately (I’m really turning into a Dwarf simp here), and I’m neglecting the fellowship members. Unforgivable! 

I interpreted this as how your relationship would develop while on the quest to destroy the ring and you’re not actually together at the start of it. Also maybe slightly OOC Aragorn. 

A/N 2: It has some nsfw hints (not much), I couldn’t help myself and it’s very unlike Aragorn I think but I’m not sorry. Also this turned out really long, I am sorry for that. 

A/N 3: Just like my other headcanons, this doesn’t make much sense so best to simply ignore this. I really don’t know what this is... :) 

Being In a Relationship With Aragorn On The Quest Would Go Like This:

Aragorn had met you in some seedy pub 

Not his first choice to take shelter from the weather but after days and days of endless rain and trudging through mud it was almost nice to be there

at least he was able to dry his clothes and have a warm meal 

he was surprised to see someone like you there 

surprised but concerned too 

for your wellbeing that is 

every single person in that bar had his eyes on you the minute you moved

Aragorn had too but for entirely different reasons

at least that’s what he told himself

so the minute one of those drunk lads laid a hand on you he was on his feet

knight in shining armor ranger clothes

before he got to you, you had floored and knocked out your assailant, threatening the others they would suffer the same fate if they tried something similar

Aragorn stood frozen in place, completely mesmerized by you

and maybe a tad bit aroused too

the life of a ranger is very lonely after all

you winked at him and left the bar shortly after

Aragorn couldn’t get you out of his head 

but what were the odds he would ever run into you again

he even returned to that godawful place a few times

a guy can hope right

you can imagine his surprise when he saw you in Rivendell

attending the secret council

he was jaw on the floor surprised

he couldn’t tear his eyes away from you

on the outside he was the cool ranger of the north, bringer of Hobbits, inventor of the Sexy But Still Rough Around The Edges Stare™

while on the inside he was  f r e a k i n g  o u t 

because there you were, finally within reach 

but then Frodo had to sacrifice himself 

and Aragorn could not not go with him 

he absolutely lost it when you volunteered as well

there was no way you were going to put your life on the line like that

you scoffed at his remark

wait did he said that out loud?

“I can handle myself just fine.”

Oh he knew that

Flashes of the bar fight filled his mind

it filled something else too 😏

so Aragorn had set himself a second goal  

besides getting Frodo and the ring to Mordor he now vowed to keep you safe as well

and to make you his by the time you would arrive at Mordor

but we all know how smooth that will go do we 

the first few days and weeks it went reasonably well 

you have to read that as ‘he didn’t embarass himself in front of you’

because there was no progress at all on any other front

you seemed to prefer the company of the Hobbits over him or any other member of the fellowship

he tried to make conversation with you every time you walked near him 

A+ for effort

when the Crebain flew over his instinct was to make sure Frodo (and Sam because those two were attached at the hip) was out of sight

after that he searched for you, but Legolas had already pulled you under the bushes with him

surely the feeling in his stomach was the fault of the Lembas bread

because Aragorn doesn’t get jealous

but then the same thing happened in Moria

you weren’t a fan of the dark and claustrophobic mines so he let you walk up front with Gandalf and Frodo near the light of Gandalf’s staff 

with him right behind you of course 

when the Orcs and Troll attacked, he tried to stay near you 

keep an extra eye out for you, driving the Orcs away who were trying to get to you

it was you together with Legolas who defeated the troll, high fiving each other over a job well done

okay fine maybe Aragorn did get jealous this time

like he had done his best to protect you but did you notice?

then when Gandalf fell you surprisingly turned to him for comfort

leaving Legolas, Gimli and Boromir to comfort the Hobbits

take that Leaf Boi

even though it felt really good to hold you, he knew you couldn’t stay there

so he ordered everyone to get going, taking the lead

and then Lothlorien happened

a forest that was both magical and romantic

perfect setting for a love confession right

when he finally got you alone he chickened out at the last moment

because OF cOUrsE

luckily for him you did not

you almost knocked him over in your attempt to kiss him  

he eagerly reciprocated the kiss though

no complaints there

but he also explained that even though he wanted this, the quest and Frodo had to come first

which you respected and understood, but you were also willing to test his resolve 👀

you didn’t tell the others 

but they didn’t need an explanation, it’s not like you two were subtle

he held your hand whenever he could 

Gimli couldn’t help but commenting on it, Aragorn explaining it was to prevent you from falling or tripping

“Lad, you’re sitting down in a boat...”

cue roaring laughter and flushed cheeks on Aragorn

although the fellowship supported your relationship they couldn’t help but tease Aragorn relentlessly

lots of sneaky forehead kisses

during the rest of the quest Aragorn did his best to keep you out of harm’s way 

to your own frustration of course, you weren’t helpless or as fragile as he made you seem

you fought alongside Boromir when Uglúk shot him 

they took Merry and Pippin and dragged you away from Boromir’s body

the one time Aragorn wasn’t at your side and you got kidnapped

you weren’t going to hear the end of this 

needless to say Aragorn was indeed beside himself with worry 

he couldn’t get a break 

first Frodo gone, then Boromir shot and now it seemed he failed his promise to himself

enter brooding Aragorn

but he knew you were brave and could take care of yourself - you had repeated that countless times - so he was sure he was going to find you 

AND HE DID

after three days of running with a dartling Elf and a wheezing Dwarf they bumped into Éomer and his horse gang

before he could ask Éomer if he saw you or the Hobbits, one of his riders jumped off their horse and made a beeline for him 

Legolas notched an arrow and Gimli raised his axe but you simply shoved them aside and threw your arms around Aragorn

relieved kisses 

the hug lasted several minutes until Legolas cleared his throat

oh right... audience

you shared a horse with Aragorn on the way to Edoras

while with King Théoden Aragorn kept an arm around your waist or a hand on the small of your back the entire time

as if he had to make sure you were still there

Éowyn who?

The Battle of Helm’s Deep was torture for Aragorn

he wanted to stay with you but you both knew you would be too distracted by each other 

it took him a while to find you after the battle was won 

few years of his life were lost in panic

but of course you were alright, already helping with the wounded

now it was his turn to sweep you off your feet

quite literally too 

as the quest progressed, it became clear to Aragorn that he had to take up his rightful place as the King of Gondor when the time came 

so during the victory feast after Helm’s Deep he took you outside for a walk

cue comments and whistling from Gimli 

but Aragorn only wanted to talk to you 

to make sure you knew what you were getting yourself into if you stayed with him 

were you ready to be the spouse of a King?

of course he made it seem as if he was going to ditch you 

because that man is angst embodied 

everything to keep you safe right?

luckily as soon as it was clear that no, he wasn’t going to ditch you and yes, this was kind of a hastily thrown together proposal in a way, you kissed him saying that as long as you were at his side you were ready for anything

as long as you were together

Aragorn taglist: @katethewriter @lovemusic26alwaysblog @sokkasdarling @snailcoveredcottage

Permanent taglist: @roosliefje @kata1803 @entishramblings @artsywaterlily @sleepy-daydream-in-a-rose @marvelschriss @kumqu4t @myrin1234 @dark-angel-is-back @the-fandoms-georgie @lathalea @xxbyimm @sokkasdarling @katethewriter @aredhel-of-gondolin @leethology @elvish-sky @moony-artnstuff @emmapotato8 @kirenia15 @vicmackeybullshxt @moarfandomtrash

[nanaminokanojo]

BLOOM | Sukuna X You | Part 1/3

CHARACTERS: Sukuna X You | Gojo Satoru | Geto Suguru | Shoko Ieiri | Maki | Fushiguro Toji | Baby Megumi | Megumi's Mom (OC) CHAPTER COUNT: 1/3 WORD COUNT: 8900+ GENRE: romance | fluff | slight angst | (eventual) smut | ooc sukuna | female reader CHAPTER TRIGGER WARNING: profanity/strong language | alcohol use | cigarette smoking | age gap | unhealthy simping XD SPOILERS: N/A

collection masterlist

one two three | Bloom Masterlist

His hair was the color of cherry blossoms, that's the first thing you noticed. It was the softest shade of pink, easy on the eyes, reminding you of the tendrils of filtered rays of the sun lightly touching the edges of clouds very early in the morning. Or your favorite angora wool sweater.

The man stole your attention from the book you were reading when you chanced a look from your periphery just to check who sat on the stool beside your usual spot on the bar – the seat at the very end by the wall. Your planned glance turned into a furtive stare at the sight of him from his candy-floss-hued hair, the rippling muscles hidden under his white oxford shirt and the array of tattoos that peeked through his neatly folded sleeves. And boy, since when did men smell like vanilla and spring while also exuding such a virile scent?

A smile tugged at the corners of your mouth at the thought, internally shaking your head at your behavior. You should not be staring at people, and though you weren't exactly ogling him, you were still observing him enough to associate him with your favorite article of winter clothing.

"Hey. The usual for you?" you heard Maki, the bar owner, ask, giving you the idea that the man was a regular. How you haven't spotted him before was a mystery.

If it was already hard concentrating on the novel you were reading, you've completely forgotten about it when you heard him say, "Make that single-malt." It's either the gates of hell opened at the sudden heat you felt on your skin at the sound of his voice or the gates of heaven did with how delicious it sounded in your ear, thick like honey and deep with a distinct ring to it. It got you wondering what his mother craved for when she was pregnant with him, and your brain said, "Greek gods," when you lifted your eyes from the current page you were reading and briefly exchanged looks with him as he shifted his line of vision from Maki to you.

You turned your eyes back to your book, making it seem like you were just absently looking about, but in reality, it took herculean effort to wrench your gaze from him. In that brief meeting of your eyes, the features of his face registered in your head like a bar code scanner, etching itself in your mind like a white-hot brand. He wasn't shockingly handsome, but he was beautiful in his own right with those intense eyes that reminded you of drowning pools and the rugged yet refined planes of his face. It was as if an artist painted him in passionate anger, slowly fell in love with the piece and began redefining his features with gentler strokes.

You turned the page of your book despite not getting any reading done. Well, it has been the case for a considerable amount of minutes now, but you tried anyway, furiously staring down at the new page but not comprehending anything. Your eyes kept scanning the same sentence over and over again but it was not sinking in at all.

"Excuse me, miss," that deep voice you've already developed a strange affection for assaulted your senses again, making your head snap up to the direction it was coming from. Hell, you think you'll do its owner's bidding just hearing it at the rate you were going, reacting automatically as if you were programmed with a voice prompt or something.

You were about to look at him but Maki caught your attention as she pushed the smoothie you ordered towards you, placing it precisely in front of you on the hardwood surface with her fingers. She arched a brow at you, causing you to stiffen on your seat.

You've been coming to the quiet little bar since you grew old enough to drink. In fact, you considered it your regular watering hole, going there whenever you can even in the day as it doubled as a gastro-pub. You've already come to know the staff who reserved the spot for you every single time you told them you were coming, particularly the tough but very lovable Maki. She's basically a friend now, and you knew you were acting off if she was giving you odd looks.

"Thanks, Maki," you said just in time, even managing to smile. She just shook her head at you before walking away to tend to another client.

"I have to know what book you are reading," the person beside you said just as you began sipping on your drink, which, you've noted, was a cherry blossom tea smoothie that reminded you of him.

You let go of the straw between your lips, swallowing hard. Turning your attention to him, you found him sitting sideways, chin propped on the heel of his palm as he regarded you. "Huh?" was all you could manage to say to him.

A slow, crooked smile etched itself across his mouth, the action appearing sensuous with the gradual way his expressions changed. "That book," he said for your benefit. "May I know what it is about?"

You just blinked, still questioning yourself if he was addressing you.

"If you're that engrossed about it, it must be great," he said. "Mind telling me the title?"

"Book?" you asked dumbly. He was really frying your brain.

He pointed at the book you were holding with his lips, protruding them slightly before smiling again. Jesus, you loved the way he smiled. The gesture didn't belong there when you've already thought he was the smirking, grinning-devil type. It was too soft a gesture, but then again his hair was shell-pink – a contradiction to his stridently brawny features.

"Oh." Despite yourself, you found yourself chuckling. "I'm sorry, I was distracted."

"Not by the book, I hope."

You looked away, smiling to yourself as you closed the object in question and slid it over to him. When you looked at him, you were surprised to see him actually reading the synopsis at the back, interest flickering in his dark eyes. You were already expecting him to just read the title, probably the author, too, thinking he was just flirting with you judging by his last words. But he was actually reading it.

"It's about an architect," he stated. "He must be mind-blowingly awesome if you're too transfixed on his story."

"No, Howard Roark is mostly a recalcitrant bastard who breaks rules here and there, doesn't cooperate or collaborate and is stone-faced about most anything."

"But it's what you like about him," he supplied.

You nodded. "He’s a breath of fresh air in a world governed by stuffy archaic principles. The spring to a long, stagnant winter of conformity. I'm in love with him." Noticing the look of amusement on his face, you were quick to add, "What?"

"Nothing." His smile didn't waver though. "Are you an architect, too?"

"Too?" you repeated with inflection then tilted your head. "Ah, you're an architect, huh?"

"Guilty."

"Any projects of note?" you asked, tilting your head in wonder when he seemed flustered. "What is it?"

He shook his head slowly. "You're very straightforward."

At that, you grinned. "Should I take you out to dinner before I get that information?" You sipped leisurely at your smoothie, glad that you throw him off as much as he flusters you.

"You don't have to," he found himself answering anyway. "But I work for a firm, so they get most of the credit. We built that new hotel at Shinjuku."

"Eh? Didn't pin you for a baroque kind of guy."

"You know..." He was all ears now judging by how he leaned closer to you. He leveled his expression to yours then. "So, what kind of guy did you think I am?"

There it is, you thought, the smirk you've been waiting for. Without giving it much thought, you said, "The Howard Roark type, of course."

***

"You seriously don't remember, do you?"

It wasn't that you didn't. You simply had no idea how you got home, considering how you ended up all smashed after enjoying too many margaritas after your smoothie. You seriously just didn't know certain things. You didn't know what happened after you reached your limit. And out of all the things you know you should not have missed, you didn't know his name.

You were sitting on the kitchen counter, nursing a headache, trying to fill in every bit of information your friends were trying to leech out of you in your addled state. You've been expecting it - the great inquisition - especially after you returned in a state lesser than they've been expecting, unconscious, according to the collective stories of your roommates, when you told them you were just stepping out to get some reading done. And on a school night, no less. Very atypical of you indeed.

"What should I be remembering?" you responded to Ieiri. You weren't exactly fond of her worrisome nature although you knew she was just watching your back especially since she has been rather disapproving of your escapades with these guys you somewhat dated back then. You appreciated it, but it didn't mean you liked it.

"Oh, I don't know, Y/N. Strawberry blond? Tats? Drives a Jeep? Ring any bells?" she said, jogging your memory. "He came knocking at two in the morning, carrying you in his arms. I mean he was hot according to Satoru, but do you even know the guy?"

“Cherry blossom,” you absently corrected the color Ieiri mentioned.

“Huh?”

“Him, I remember.” You smiled at the thought, not hiding your delight from them. You were sure they were just annoyed that they weren't in on the action since Satoru, your other friend and roommate, who seem nonexistent recently, was the one who interacted with the man you met and supposedly brought you back to the house you rented with all of them. And Satoru doesn't know basic decorum to actually ask what the man’s name was. "Howard."

"Howard?" Suguru, another one of your friends who was in the literature department as you were, asked. "Howard Roark?" He knew the reference, obviously. You forced him to read the book before it even became one of your study materials.

You nodded enthusiastically. "He's an architect."

"He didn't look like a 'Howard,' apparently," Ieiri said.

"That name is from her favorite book," Suguru supplied, his dark eyes shifting to you as he tucked some stray strands of his long, raven locks which were currently tied in a half-up. "So your guy's an architect, too."

"That, but he isn't 'my guy' and I don't know what his name is."

He grinned then. "If you're openly calling him by the name of the character you claim to be in love with, I'm assuming..."

"No!" Ieiri gasped.

You laughed despite the action making your head hurt. You were still hungover after all, but you didn't mind, not when you knew you had a good night. Probably a great night to allow yourself to be hammered like you have been. You only ever drank to your fill when the company is great and when you were in a jovial mood.

"It's nothing like that. He just feels like spring time. Looks like it, too." You waved your hands in front of you for emphasis. Still, your expressions said otherwise.

You weren't in love with the man because you didn't believe in mushy things like love at first sight, but you knew you liked him, just that you weren't getting your hopes up cause there's a chance you might not see him ever again, assuming your meeting was something transient like the blossoms his hair made you think of. Even if he was a regular at Maki's, if your schedules didn't coincide with one another, it would not be easy to meet. You've been coming to the same bar for years and yet, you've only ever seen him that time. You never really know.

But then, you got your answer pretty quickly.

From: Satoru

See you at 7 tomorrow night. Same place.

That’s how Satoru's message read, sent late the previous night. You almost forgot about the agreement you’ve had with him to get unlimited barbecue after sleeping the rest of the day but you made it out just in time. It was something you did with all three of your friends as a way to bond with them individually.

You glanced at the clock on your phone, feeling the stares of the restaurant staff on you. Well, you’ve been there for more than an hour waiting for him. One hour and thirteen minutes to be precise. All you’ve ordered so far was a glass of lemonade and you were able to finish that in the first half hour, sitting on a table for two when evidently, you were alone. All your texts were ignored and your calls were always being redirected to voicemail.

“Where the fuck are you, Gojo Satoru?” you asked him in one of your messages, hissing low into your phone just so the other diners would not be offended by your words. You got a message another twenty minutes later, the sound of your phone almost making you jump from your seat. However, when you looked at it, it was from an unknown number.

You were about to check the message when one of the waitresses came to your table, pad and pen on the ready. She’s always the one who served you whenever you and your friends would go there for a dose of beef and pork fat, and she has always been nice to you.

“Not to be nosy but I think your friend isn’t coming.”

You nodded, grimacing. “Tell me about it.”

“The boss has been giving you the stink eye, too.”

Looking over the counter, you saw the elderly man really looking at you. He looked away when you met his eyes, muttering to himself. You knew how the owner could get, but you simply loved going there since their food is good and the service is just the same. You smiled ruefully at the woman before you. “I’ll have a sukiyaki set and warm sake, please. Thank you.”

“Would that be all?”

“Yeah.”

“Coming right up.” She flashed you a bright smile before disappearing into the back rooms.

You almost forgot the message you saw earlier, but then, your phone lit up again with that familiar tone. The new message was from the same number.

From: Unknown

How are you?

From: Unknown

I hope you’re okay.

You frowned, not having the slightest clue as to who could be texting you.

From: You

Who is this?

Your order came but there was no response from the mystery texter or Satoru. You felt pathetic looking at your phone every once in a while as you ate and drank. Normally, you wouldn’t even have given anybody, including your best friends, the time of the day, making you wait for longer than an hour without as much as a message. You don’t ever wait for people over the agreed meeting time. You hated it with passion. And you were already thinking of ways to make Satoru pay.

You were about to eat a mouthful of beef when you heard the chair across you being dragged back. Your eyes flicked to the direction, and to your utter shock, you almost dropped your chopsticks if it weren’t for the hand that reached out and held onto your hand, securing the utensils.

Once again, you were sitting on your usual spot at the bar, eyes clashing with those intense ones owned by the pink-haired guy who apparently drove a charcoal grey Jeep and reminded you of spring, the same one who drove you home the other night.

“Careful,” he said, his scent assaulting your senses.

A lump formed in your throat, making you unable to form proper words, so you settled for putting down the chopsticks. You folded your hands together on your lap, recovering from your consternation before you finally looked at him, unable to help it but grin. He looked different that day, more laid back in a white baseball cap mussing his candy-floss hair down, a loose-fitting shirt in the same hue and jeans. He looked so fresh, you felt the air around you cool down considerably.

“How did you…” you hesitated and shook you head. “Hello.”

He broke into that crooked smile. “Crazy how the moment you sent the message, I saw you through the glass walls while I drove past.”

You opened your mouth to say something, but closed it again, not quite knowing how to react to it when suddenly, the first part of his statement registered in your mind. “Wait, message?” You picked up your phone, showing him the messages. “This is you?”

He nodded slowly. “Looks like you’re doing great.” He regarded the bottle of sake on the table. “I had to get your number to check up on you. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Y-yeah, I mean, no, not at all. Thank you by the way.” You chuckled, saving his number and naming him Spring God in your contacts. “I wasn’t really expecting you to bring me home.”

“I got your address from your driving license.” He grinned then. “I thought of taking you back to my place, but I didn’t know how that would sit with you.”

Who says chivalry was dead? “I’m sorry for acting crazy, if I did anyway." You chuckled. "I don't remember…and for having to bring me all the way to the house.”

“It’s fine. It was lovely meeting Satoru.”

At that, your face flushed red. You winced. “I’m sorry for whatever he did while I was out of it.” He could be crazy at times, and you wouldn't be surprised if he did something untoward.

He shook his head, letting out a slight chuckle. “He was very nice to me, don’t worry.” He furrowed his brows then. “I also got your name. Y/N. I don’t know if you forgot to tell me or you just didn’t trust me enough, but I’d like to think it’s the former since you didn’t seem to think twice about getting wasted with me like you did.”

You deliberately didn’t tell him your name, but he was making it sound a little nicer. It wasn’t really something you planned on doing again, meeting him, but somehow, he found you. You shook you head, coming clean. “If you put it that way, okay, but really, I thought it was better if you didn’t know.”

“Hmm. Why is that?”

You found it endearing that he tilted his head a bit to the side when he asked the question. Your lips curled upwards at the corner. “I just never thought I’d meet you again.”

“That would be unfortunate.”

You laughed awkwardly at his remark. “I didn’t mean that in a bad way.”

“I’m not offended.”

“Okay.”

You requested for another order of barbecue for him. He declined but you insisted. “Come on. My treat for your act of kindness.” You snickered. “Besides, my supposed date bailed.”

“Date?”

Sighing, you said, “Well, not really. Satoru. We agreed to meet here over an hour ago but he hasn’t been answering my messages or calls. Something probably came up.”

He eyed you thoughtfully. “If you don't mind me asking, is he your...?"

"My what?"

"Your boyfriend…maybe."

You chuckled at the thought, but then you realized you didn't even know his name. "I don't really tell strangers about things like that," you teased.

“Okay, but I thought we’re past being strangers.” He smirked then and you swore you felt your stomach flip.

“We’re in the getting-to-know-each-other phase,” you told him with a laugh, acceding. "Since I didn't tell you my name, I didn't expect you to tell me yours. Plus I didn't ask, so may I have yours?"

"Sukuna," he said. "Ryomen Sukuna."

"Su-ku-na," you repeated, liking the feel of the syllables as they rolled out of your tongue. Finally, the person you've gotten so fond of in just a short time had a name. You didn't know what his name meant but it seemed to match him well regardless of how arbitrary it was to his person. You couldn't think of any better name though. "I like your name. It's pretty." You smiled brightly at him then. "And no, Satoru is not my boyfriend."

Ryomen Sukuna was an absolute puzzle to you. How he could look so badass and pretty much intimidating with his strapping physique and inked skin – throw in the multiple piercings on his left ear which you were noticing or the first time – while also pulling off all these adorable little actuations was a quandary to you. Tall, solidly built men like him should not be reminding you of soft, cute things, but the moment he blinked in confusion, you knew you couldn't get enough of it.

"Nobody ever said that about my name, but thanks," he returned in that deep voice after a moment's pause. And was that a dusting of roses over his cheeks? The surprises you were getting from this man was endless. He really was such a breath of fresh air, so far from the usual stereotypes.

Your face seemed to be perpetually pulled into a smile whenever you were around him, and you didn't think you were doing a good job suppressing the urge to be beaming like an idiot around him. "So, anyway, what made you think that blue-eyed idiot is my boyfriend?" you asked, changing the topic.

"Well, he was a bit hostile at first when he took you from me, making me explain things but then started apologizing after. He told me you could be a handful when inebriated..." He let his voice trail off as if letting you chew on his words.

"You agree with him." It wasn't a question.

"Yes." Sukuna pretended to frown. "He also calls you 'his princess'."

You threw your head back, covering your eyes momentarily in embarrassment. "Now I wish you met Ieiri and Suguru instead," proceeding to explain that the nickname was something akin to what a father would call his precious daughter.

"He was rather intimidating, but I guess he's just looking out for you."

"He's still not off the hook for standing me up," you quipped, "But you finding him intimidating is funny."

"Why?"

You scoffed, gesturing over to him. "I think you can snap him in two if you wished, too."

"He was scary," Sukuna insisted.

"He's harmless...most of the time, but yeah, he’s rather protective. That’s one of my dads for you."

He laughed then. "There's nothing scarier than a fiercely protective friend…or a doting father. I can't muscle my way out of that for sure."

"Ah, then you'll find Ieiri scarier."

The night pretty much went well and ended on a good note. Sukuna did most of the talking for the rest of the night. You learned he was six years older than you at twenty nine, one of the head architects at the firm he worked for, has a love-hate relationship with his job cause he wants to draw portraits instead, was a delinquent when he was younger but got away with things cause he was a straight-A student, loved dogs so much that he cries when they die in movies, was closer to his mom, got his tattoos on a sudden whim, and was pretty much a sweet, charming genuine person which contrasted his appearance. What you see isn't what you get. That just isn't how it worked with him.

You loved it when he talked. It was rather entertaining as he had a way of telling stories which made you feel like you were actually there when it happened. Eventually, you forgot the reason why you were at the restaurant in the first place. It was as if you went there for the purpose of meeting Sukuna himself. Satoru was all but forgotten as you dissolved into carefree laughter and playful banters, and you felt at ease and more like yourself around him, pretty much like when you were with your three favorite people in the world.

“It’s not really that funny,” Sukuna told you, watching you laugh heartily at that one episode in his freshmen year when he made a mistake of going on a date with the wrong girl who happened to have the same name as his supposed date. You continued to laugh as if he didn’t say anything.

“It’s just crazy that both of them were there at the same time. I mean, what were the odds?”

He parked by the sidewalk in front of your house, killing the engine. “That’s the reason why I have never agreed to a single blind date ever again.” He pulled the key out of the ignition, glancing at the direction of your house. “We’re here.”

Your laughter died down when you followed the direction of his gaze. The lights were off except for the one lighting up the porch of the house you shared with your friends. You returned your gaze to him then. “Thanks for driving me home. Again.”

“I enjoyed your company. It’s the least I can do.”

You smiled warmly at him, reaching over to give him a chaste kiss on the cheek when he suddenly turned his head a fraction towards you. That minute change made your lips end up against his instead. He was surprised at first and remained immobile against you, but when you pulled away, he chased you back, connecting your mouths, his lips feeling soft and warm yet emitting that air of dominance as it coaxed yours to move in sync with his. You were kissing him back in no time, but you immediately caught yourself and withdrew, utterly flustered.

Your heart thudded heavily as he held you in his intense gaze, his tongue slowly running over his lower lip, making you even more mentally incapacitated. It made you want to just pull him back to you and covet those lips with yours again. You snapped out of it though. You already knew he was capable of hot-wiring and hijacking your brain.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” you told him when you were able to form words again.

Sukuna looked at you from under his lashes, smiling slightly. “I’m not.”

Taken aback, you chuckled nervously. “No?”

He shook his head, reached over and ruffled your hair a bit. “Go inside. It’s late.” You nodded and disembarked from the car while he leaned on the steering wheel, watching you. You were already on the pavement, about to close the door, when he spoke again. “Can I come see you again?”

“Sure,” you said without thinking. “Good night, Sukuna.” Man, you just loved saying his name.

“Bye, Y/N. Good night.”

He drove away while you made your way towards your doorstep. Your fingers flew to your lips once you were standing on your porch, smiling to yourself at the realization of having kissed him. Shaking your head, you fished for the keys from your pocket and entered the house, not quite remembering how you got to your room, but you slept that night with pleasant dreams of running your fingers through pink locks of hair.

***

"I'm really sorry. Something came up and my phone died."

You acceded. It wasn’t as if Satoru did something so big. You went to the outdoor kiosks near the parking lot by the football grounds to catch up on some reading while Satoru ate and told you bits of his past few days, since he got held up at their family estate. Having such a traditional, high-ranking family in the country sure had its downsides, and you weren't about to make him even more agitated than he already was. He had it difficult, you knew that, and you weren’t about to be petty over him not coming to your supposed bonding time. He may be happy-go-lucky but you felt tension simmering just under the surface when you squeezed his hand in assurance.

Suguru and Ieiri followed shortly after Satoru fetched you from class, also surprised to see him there. "So, you finally decided to show up," the former said.

"Don't ask," Satoru said.

"Wasn't planning to," Suguru scoffed, his attention shifting to you. “What are you working on anyway?” he asked, flipping the file you were reading haphazardly to peer through the contents.

“I’m making an analysis report on ‘The Romantic Manifesto’.” you answered, looking up from the notes you were writing when your eyes suddenly strayed over his shoulder. You almost did a double-take, glancing at Suguru before returning your line of vision at the spot beyond where he sat.

“It’s due…” your voice trailed off when you realized just what, or rather who, you were looking at. You weren’t so sure whether what you were seeing was real or a mirage, a very familiar, specific and detailed one, but then, you figured it was the former when the person smirked and cocked his head to the side, beckoning you over to where he leaned against his grey Jeep as he raised a cup of what looked like cherry blossom tea.

Suguru arched a brow at you, looking behind him but not really noticing the object of your distraction. “Hey, you okay?”

Ieiri followed the direction of your gaze and nudged you when she saw who you were looking at. "Is that your Howard? Damn, girl. He’s sizzling."

You nodded, but at that same moment, you rose from the table without any explanation, your feet immediately leading you towards the outdoor carpark. When you were within earshot, you said, “What are you doing here?”

You stopped a few feet from him, glancing behind you to where the others had already turned their heads to follow the path you took, flashing you shit-eating grins. It wouldn’t surprise you anymore if they had pieced together who the person was before you. They claimed to be your ‘parents’ but acted like children at times.

“I brought you tea.” Sukuna walked towards you, standing so close that you forgot how to breathe for a few seconds as you inhaled his scent and took in his appearance, looking immaculate in a plain white shirt and faded jeans, but your brain only seemed to register those lips and the memory of how they felt against yours.

You shook your head, snapping out of your trance, mentally cursing at yourself. “Hi.” You exhaled loudly, trying hard not to smile like an idiot while you absently twirled your hair on your finger, suddenly seeing the world through a pinkish filter. "How do you keep finding me?"

Sukuna's smile dropped. “Did I come at an inconvenient time?” he asked gently, trying hard not to sound miffed, but he obviously was taken aback by your words.

“No.” You shook your head, placing a hand over your forehead. You finally smiled at him, letting out a choked snicker. “No, Sukuna. It’s good to see you. It’s just that I wasn’t expecting to see you here. And you didn't really tell me you were coming.”

He grinned at you then but he still appeared unsure, placing a hand behind his neck. “Right.”

You flashed him a helpless look. “Please don’t look at me like that. I’m just really surprised.”

“Hmm." He moved closer to you, wrapping your hand around the transparent disposable cup. His proximity was affecting you in ways you couldn't admit out loud. "Are you happy to see me, too?"

"Too? So, you're happy to see me?"

"Always."

That's it. You're done for. Trying to avoid his intense gaze and escaping his scrutiny, you glanced over your shoulder to find everyone on your table observing you blatantly. Satoru raised a thumb at you while Ieiri was giggling with Suguru.

"Are those your friends?" Sukuna commented, his minty breath fanning against the side of your face which made you turn a little too quickly to face him again only to be confronted by his face leaning towards yours, mere centimeters away.

“Y-yeah.” You leaned a bit backwards but he moved forward. “That they are.” You stepped backwards again, nearly faltering on your feet, but you immediately gained your balance when he grabbed you by the arm, steadying you.

"Are you alright?" Sukuna asked, looking at you with concern written all over his face which morphed into wonder when you said, "Yeah, you're just overwhelming."

"Huh?"

"I can't think properly when I'm around you," you stated casually, your expressions not giving anything away as per usual. You arched a brow at him when he did the same. "You hot-wire my brain."

"I know what you mean." He smirked despite his confusion. "Is that good or bad?"

You eyed him thoughtfully, biting on your lower lip. "Good for you, bad for me. You can probably tell me to eat dirt and I'd do it in a heartbeat."

He chuckled, looking at you tenderly. "You're too honest."

"To a fault," you agreed, "Suguru tells me all the time. Wanna meet them?"

He ruffled your hair. "Sure."

***

While you weren't exactly expecting to see Sukuna again after the night you met, he became of constant presence around you. You have gone out with him several times over the course of two months. He was a busy person and you also had your priorities, but he always makes you feel special whenever you two would be out and about, behaving like such a gentleman opening and closing doors for you, naturally shifting closer to traffic while you walked, bringing an extra jacket in case you felt cold or a larger umbrella so you don't get wet, bringing you your favorite tea whenever he could.

He picked you up from school for lunch twice, making the most of the hour, and one time, you brought him lunch at work when he suddenly canceled on you, saying he was swamped with work. He sounded really upset so you decided to go to him instead. You brought Suguru with you as a buffer, but Sukuna's colleagues still teased him. He was different in the office – gruff and strict which fitted him more – but he still beamed at you happily when you brought him food, not caring who saw.

Apart from the brief phone calls, you two never really texted. It wasn't really your thing and he didn't like it either, so it could go days on end without you saying anything to each other, but when you do get a chance to speak, it would always be like picking up on where you've left off. He has only ever sent you two messages. One to remind you to take good care of yourself because he was going to be away for a while and another one a week later asking if you wanted to go out with him that coming Friday night.

"Your timing's off," you told him over the phone. You really wanted to say yes, but, "Ieiri, the boys and I are going out that night. Gang tradition."

"Some other time then?"

"Sure."

You hung up after a few more exchanges of words, getting started on reading some notes when Ieiri entered the kitchen. "Was that Howard?"

"Yeah. He's inviting me to go out on Friday, but I already said yes to clubbing with you guys."

She grinned cheekily, wrapping an arm around you as she poked you on the cheek. At times, it feels like Satoru was rubbing off on her. "Are you sure you don't want to ditch us for the hot architect?"

"Hot architect –" You snickered. "Did you just say that?"

"I was supposed to say 'sugar daddy,' literally and figuratively. Sugar and his cotton candy hair. Get it?"

You narrowed your eyes at her, shaking your head. It was supposed to be amusing, but when Ieiri says it, it just sounds weird. "Can I read in peace now?"

She left you alone, but laughed at your expense.

Friday couldn't have rolled around fast enough and you headed out with your friends at the club owned by a friend of yours, prepared to party in a pair of tight-fitting jeans, a crop top and your hair hanging about in wavy layers. You were already expecting the place to be cramped as hell given the day of the week so much so that Suguru had to hold onto you tightly so as not to lose you when you entered until you found the area you had reserved for the night. It was for good measure too since the place was drenched in purple, blue and green laser lights which were disorienting at first. And so, your night began as such.

You were in the middle of dancing, only pausing when you had to down your nth shot for the night when your eyes suddenly strayed to the bar area at the elevated part of the club adjacent to the the leather seats. You looked away but returned your gaze towards said direction when you realized this very familiar guy was looking at you. He was watching you as you danced and let loose, a ghost of a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

You craned your neck, looking back and thinking the guy looked a lot like Sukuna, but then he couldn’t be. He was engaged elsewhere, still you continued to ogle him until you were pretty sure it wasn’t the same person. But the longer you looked, the more it was being proven to you that it was him.

That lopsided smile drew itself across his lips, seeing as how you were doubting yourself about his identity. There was no mistaking that look on his face, the way his dark eyes seemed to sparkle whenever he smiled even if the action didn't belong there.

“Sukuna?” you mouthed his name and he nodded, motioning for you to come over with his head. It had been a solid ten days since you last saw him, and for some reason, your heart raced at the thought of seeing him there.

Without saying a word to the people you were with, you squeezed yourself through the crowd, your feet carrying to the upstairs bar, to Sukuna. It took you a while to traverse the space between you, and when you finally stood before him, all you could do was smile up at him, taking in the soft look about him as he regarded you which were at odds to those fiery eyes that had the capability to turn into bright orbs of light when he beamed down at you.

“Hello, Y/N. Once again, fate has brought you to me,” he said rather dramatically, a smirk drawing itself across his pretty mouth.

Laughter escaped your throat, unable to say anything when you realized that you actually missed him, missed looking at him. Unable to help it, you stood on your toes and reached out to touch his hair, the action surprising the both of you. He eyed you, his expressions that of a half-smile and a look of confusion while you retracted your hands as quickly as you felt his soft locks with your fingertips, wincing at the realization of what you were doing.

At that, he laughed heartily, stealing your hand and pressing it over the side of his head. “Go ahead. I don’t mind you touching me,” he told you, staring into your eyes that you felt like all the air in the room was gone.

You blinked at him, processing what he said and joined in his mirth. “You're here!” You shook your head when it dawned to you that you were stating the obvious. “I’m sorry. How are you, Sukuna?”

“Pink?” he offered and chuckled at his own joke which made your face heat up. “Kidding. I’m great. I missed you these past days. How are you?”

“You did?” You felt your insides melting at his statement, made worse when he nodded to confirm it. “I’m fine. Great. Where have you disappeared to anyway?”

He snickered a your question. “Madrid.”

Your jaw dropped. “As in Spain?”

He nodded. “Had to do something there.”

“Uh-huh.” His words were rather obscure, but you didn’t want to encroach on his private life.

“What are the odds that we’re at the same club?”

“The owner is a friend,” you answered, smiling awkwardly as you glanced at the direction of your friends on the dance floor. You saw all of them looking at you. Suguru winked at you, giving you the thumbs up, making you laugh at his silliness.

“The gang’s all here, I see.”

“What?” You faced Sukuna, finding him leaning close beside you against the metal balustrade. Just then, a waiter passed by holding a whole tray of shots, and before you could duck, he grabbed you by the waist so that you were leaning against him with no quantifiable space between your bodies. Your eyes widened in shock and you froze, your thoughts clouded by the familiar smell of rain in a bamboo forest during Maytime. “T-thanks…”

He hummed in response to your gratitude, but he didn’t let you go. “I didn’t know you enjoyed places like this, too.”

“Why is that?” you asked, feigning ignorance to how close you two were.

"I never pinned you for the party animal type. I kinda developed a fondness for that quiet, nerdy girl sitting at the corner of the pub."

"Not exactly. I prefer Maki's place to be honest but coming here once in a while doesn't hurt. Especially with those three." You frowned slightly at him then as you thought of something. “So, why didn’t you approach me?” You motioned towards the dancefloor. “I'm sure the three-headed monster won't mind if you joined us. You alone?”

“Yes, sweetheart, but aren't you supposed to be hanging out with them?" You grabbed his arm before he could refuse you and started leading him towards where the others were.

However, he had other plans in mind. Again, he hooked an arm around your waist until your back was leaning against him. You eyed him sideways, startled by his actions, but unable to counteract it anyway as you’re just stunned speechless all the while. “You can go back to them, Y/N, but I don’t think I should go with you.”

You turned around, gently easing away from his hold. “Why not? They already know you, and they like you.”

"Are you sure? I don't want to be a party pooper.” He leaned towards you, tilting his head to the side while his lower lip slightly jutted out.

"What are you talking about?” You rolled your eyes at him then snickered.

He eyed you seriously then. “Just in case this is a friends-only affair?”

“Satoru already ruined that by bringing his girls into the mix.” You laughed at him when you saw him hesitate. “Come on, Sukuna. Join us. For me?” You showed him your best impression of puppy-dog eyes. “Pretty please?”

When you saw that he wasn’t budging, you changed your argument. “Fine. Dance with me then.” You didn’t give him any time to contradict you as you took him by the hand and dragged him to the dancefloor.

He was just standing still, looking uncomfortable as you started to groove to the beat, so you took his arms and started moving them until he was moving on his own, finally breaking into that smile. He looked too awkward that you wanted to laugh but decided against it, simply raising your hands and feeling the music.

“Aren’t you having fun?” you asked him as you were bobbing your head to the bass.

“I am!” he answered above the music.

“You don’t look like you’re having fun. Are you shy?” You chuckled openly at that.

“No.”

“You don’t dance?”

“I can dance.”

You giggled. “Then show me what you’ve got!”

Without a warning, he started moving in sync with you, taking your hands in his and finally letting loose in such a graceful manner as you both got into the beat and started waving and swaying against one another, his hands slowly running at your sides in sensual rhythms that got you reeling in excitement. You almost forgot that you were with other people as you danced with him. It was fun and it felt good to be that carefree, not minding your friends, drinks flowing in nonstop.

Soon, the group you’ve left joined you and Sukuna. They all greeted him excitedly while the boys exchanged high-fives with him as they were dancing. Satoru and the two girls who were with him also joined in and somewhere along that, Suguru offered everyone cigarettes, and you gladly took one when you saw Sukuna taking one as well. You didn’t really smoke on a regular basis but you didn’t exactly shy away from the so-called cancer sticks.

After taking another shot, you pulled Sukuna out of the dancefloor, hollering at the others as you raised your cigarette, signaling where you were going in case they wanted to come with. You made your way to the smoking area at the veranda situated at the back of the building with the older male in tow. You were pretty much buzzed, calming down from the high you had while dancing, grinning wide as the cool night air met you, making your lungs expand as you breathed in.

Sukuna watched you as he took his place against the banister, following him shortly as you produced a lighter from your pocket, something that you always carried just in case.

“You smoke?” he asked, toying with his own battered stick, twirling it around his long fingers.

“Sometimes,” you admitted, watching his reaction. “And you?”

“Not really.”

“You took one anyway.” You wedged the item in question between your lips and raised the lighter, but before you could light it, it was pulled out from your mouth and the next thing you knew, Sukuna was kissing you, his lips pressed against yours as he pulled you closer by the hips which he seemed to have a fixation for since you came up to him. It was a soft yet urgent kiss that cajoled you to respond, and not long after, your lips were submissive clouds moving to the will of the wind that was his luscious mouth.

Like the first time you felt his lips against yours, electricity ran through your body as if he was touching you elsewhere apart from your mouth. It was driving you off the edge of sanity, and you knew you’d probably jump off a cliff for the male. He grinned at your dazed state when your eyes met after he finally pulled away, showing you the cigarette that was supposed to be between your lips before he unceremoniously laid claim to them.

“You’re going to ruin your lips by smoking. I’m keeping this,” he told you.

You were too mesmerized with the tingling feeling in your mouth while your eyes stayed glued to his as you blinked slowly, your mind and heart racing at a thousand miles per second. “W-why would you do that?” you stammered, feeling your throat go so dry that you had to drag the words out.

“Apart from the fact that it’s terribly unhealthy, it ruins your sense of smell and taste.” He waved the cigarette in front of you before shoving it into the pocket of his jeans. “Scientific fact.”

You couldn’t quite process what he was saying. You were asking why he kissed you, but he misunderstood. “Are you going to taser me with your lips every single time I’m about to smoke?”

“Taser…” He chuckled and narrowed his eyes at you. “I might just if it means these dangerous things don’t touch your pretty mouth.”

“What the –” You didn’t know if you would be scandalized by what he said or if you were going to laugh. The latter won and you tittered. “That’s a good one.”

“I mean it, Y/N.”

Boldness engulfed your whole thought process as you stepped closer to him, looking straight into his eyes. “And if I insist on it? Placing dangerous things in my pretty mouth? What are you going to do then?”

He, too, leaned forward, eyes flicking to your lips. “Then I guess I just have to keep your mouth too busy to even think about smoking again,” he whispered to you, his breath hitting your lips.

You smirked at him then. “I guess I just have to make sure you aren’t around if I do feel like smoking.”

He pouted. You burst out laughing.

You reached over and pinched both of his cheeks. “You’re so adorable.”

Sukuna swatted your hands away, but smiled nonetheless. "You're the only one who says I'm adorable."

"You are. You just don't know it."

“Okay then. If you say so.” He tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear then, your skin tingling where he touched you. “Are you busy tomorrow?”

“Not really.”

“Good. I wanna do something for you.”

You eyed him questioningly. “Hmm. What?”

“That’s a surprise.”

It was already around two in the morning when everyone had the unanimous decision to leave the club which was still packed. You, too, were getting tired especially after Ieiri ended up hammered and Satoru was emptying his guts through his mouth. Suguru was a bit drunk, too, but he was trying his best to help you take care of them. Sukuna had been very nice all night, even helping you load Satoru and Ieiri into the backseat of Suguru’s car.

“Would you like me to drive you home?” he asked you after shutting the door to the backseat.

“No, I’m gonna be fine. Besides, I can’t just leave Suguru to deal with them both.” You motioned to his Jeep. “You should go ahead, too.”

Sukuna grimaced as he nodded. “I guess that would be for the best. Anyway, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Okay. You take good care now.”

“You, too, sweetheart.” He stepped forward and pulled you against him, hugging you, enveloping you in his warmth and that scent you loved profusely. “It’s really great seeing you tonight.”

You returned the gesture, smiling up at him as you tried to compose yourself. “It’s great seeing you, too.” You stood on your toes and pecked him on the cheek before giving him a gentle shove towards the car. “See you, Sukuna.”

He waved at you then boarded the car. You watched as it disappeared down the street before turning away to enter the club to get Suguru who was left to settle the bills. You found him seated on one of the couches, finding your way easily since the crowd thinned a bit.

“You okay, dude?” you asked when you reached him. He was pale and he looked like he was going to throw up anytime. “Do you need to go to the restroom?”

He shook his head. “Just get me out of here.”

You chuckled, leading him faster out of the club. You sat him down on passenger side and soothed his back, asking after him again as you started the engine. He said he was fine, laughing when he caught a glimpse of the two who were already passed out on the backseat with Satoru lying on Ieiri’s lap while her head was lolling limply to the side.

The drive was rather short without much cars on the road, but Suguru was still able to squeeze in a conversation, and of all the topics he could broach, it had to be about Sukuna.

“I thought Sukuna will be driving you home,” he began, glancing at you.

“He offered, but I can’t just leave you.”

“That would have been okay.” He glanced at the rearview mirror then, checking on the two, you could only guess. He could be such a mother hen at times. “I think he’s cool.”

“Mhmm.”

“And he’s really good-looking,” Suguru threw in with a chuckle. “Just date already.”

You chuckled. “Why don’t you date him instead?”

“Don’t you want to try it out with him?”

“He hasn’t even asked me to date him.”

“Yeah, but he already kissed you –”

“How did you know about that?” you demanded, mortified. Your cheeks were heating up again at the memory of it.

“Well, you’re in a public place.” He laughed. “So, it’s bound to end in dating anyway.”

“Not necessarily.” You turned sideways to look at him. “He’s older after all, not that I see the age gap as a problem. But you know, he might just be passing time.”

“He obviously likes you. If you date him, it’s a win-win situation. You like him, too, you just don’t know it.”

You scoffed. “How can you say that?”

He blew a raspberry. Typical Suguru behavior. “You can be yourself around him. You’re all smiley face around him, too. I saw you. You can’t lie to me.”

“Really now?”

“Yeah. You look your best that way. And don’t ever think you are just a pastime. I’ll kill him if he treats you as such.” He smiled knowingly at you. “Besides, you should date properly. Enough with your flings with stupid boys in campus.”

“Okay, dad.” You sighed, trying to contain your excitement. “I do like him though. He’s so nice to me.”

Suguru reached over patting you on the shoulder. “Ah! My daughter is a grown-woman.”

You swatted at his hand, laughing at his antics.

-end of part 1-

If you're curious who Howard Roark is, he's one of my fave literary characters from Ayn Rand's "The Fountainhead." He's excellently made. That's it.

Can architect!sukuna please call me "sweetheart," too?

If you want to be included in the tag list, please DM me :) I'll be posting every week (or I'll try to anyway). Someone remind me to post the next chapters please?

Additional notes are available in the masterlist, particularly on the reasons why I wrote some things the way I did. I don't know what I'm trying to prove there, but haha!

Thank you so much for reading. Likes, comments and reblogs are deeply appreciated! Hope you enjoyed it.

© ORIGINAL WORK BY nanaminokanojo. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY GEGE AKUTAMI'S JUJUTSU KAISEN. [20210618]

PHOTO/IMAGE/GIF/FANART SOURCES FULLY CREDITED TO THE RESPECTIVE OWNERS.

[thatoneitaliangirl]

Oh my gosh could you write a childe x reader thing 🥺🥺 I wanna just have some sweet angst with a happy outcome somehow 😔

I may have gone a bit overboard- At this point, I feel I'm literally incapable of writing anything under 1,000 words. So sorry this took so long, I had to take a break from writing to work out some things with school. A bunch of nonsense and stuff lol. You didn't specify gender, so I wrote the reader as female, only cause that's what I'm used to working with. I apologize if that's not what you wanted. I can always whip up something for ya with your preferred pronouns! But I'm not sure if I'll make it this long . . . I honestly don't know how I even did this, like this is a feat I feel. Anyways, I hope Childe isn't too OOC in this. I'm not the best when it comes to writing angst, so I hope you like it! And just as a little explanation beforehand, I read up that Childe joined the Fatui when he was about 14, became a Harbinger at 18, and is considered a young adult. So in this fic, it's assumed that he and you are at least 20 years old just so the timeline adds up and stuff. Also, despite how long this is, Childe isn't in it as much as you probably wanted- I have a tendency to write more about the reader than the characters. It's something I'm trying to break, but I was just so proud of this. I hope you like it! Anyways, happy reading!!! ^^

Childe x Reader Angst

Plot- Reader and Childe have been together for years when Reader finds out that Childe killed her sister when she was young.

Word count- 8,864 (I'm so sorry)

Warnings- Mentions of death, sadness, bad writing, possible suicide at the end(But just mentioned as a fear), swearing, and cringe 'funny' moments cause why not.

The wind blows through your hair as you sit atop a ledge overlooking Liyue Harbor. Today is your younger sister's birthday, and for the past six years, it's been nothing but a reminder of your failure. You were supposed to take care of her. After your parents passed away, you were all she had left, and she, you. But you were just a kid yourself, hardly capable of raising a child.

You bite your lip and look over at all the families walking about, having fun. It brings a smile to your face knowing at least some people can be happy on this day. She wouldn't have wanted doom and gloom to be her only remembrance. The sun in the sky is warm, beaming down on your skin. You've fought many battles for the Adventurers Guild during your time living in town, and are proud to say you've survived. Even escaped a few sparring matches with Childe relatively unscathed.

You win every time, but it's no surprise given he lets you win. That's one of the many things you love about him. He tries to put you first in most situations as much as he can with his job. And it's the little things like letting you win a fake fight that makes you feel like you're floating.

Your relationship is practically plastered on every notice board in town with how affectionate you are to each other. Not a soul in Liyue can look at you and not know you are the Harbinger's lover. But you're okay with that.

Taking in a calm breath, you hop down and glide your way to the docks below.

"Good morning, _____! Nice weather, isn't it?" You smile at the young girl as she approaches you. You've known her for a while now, and have come to consider yourself friends. She seems a bit nervous though.

"It certainly is. Are you okay, Chen?" Her smile drops and she grips onto her arms.

"Can I ask a favor of you? It's rude of me, but I'm desperate!"

"It's fine, what's the matter?" The young girl sighs.

"My brother borrowed a loan from Northland Bank last month and the payments were due two days ago. He told me he was going to pay it back . . . He hasn't been home since. I just thought that . . ."

"You want me to ask Tar?" Her eyes snap up to yours.

"Will you? Please? I'm just so worried about him! I told him not to take that loan, but he never listens to me." You put your hand on her shoulder to calm her down.

"It's okay. It's no problem at all! I was just headed there anyway. I'll see about your brother for you." Young Chen sighs in relief and reaches in her pocket.

"Here, I want you to take this as payment." You shake your head and push her hand away.

"No, I could never!"

"I insist! My mother gave this to me when I was a kid," She opens your hand and places a small coin in before closing your hand around it.

"She told me travelers would give these coins to people who did favors for them and that they grant wishes! Though I'm sure that's just a children's story; I was never able to get it to work." You give the coin a look, hesitant, before slipping it into your pocket.

"Alright, I'll accept. Thank you!" You wave goodbye to Chen and head towards the bank. Childe spends most of his days there, what he does, you have no idea. It's a mystery. The most you get out of him is 'business' which, yeah, obviously you do business. But it's understandable. The Fatui are a questionable lot, and not many people in Liyue trust them.

The Qixing keep a close eye on them as well, though you're sure even they hardly know what goes down under the 'bank' façade. Sometimes Childe comes home with cuts and bruises, claiming they're from training with his comrades, and while you don't buy that one bit, you play along. No need to add to his stress. If he thought you needed to know, he would tell you. No doubt about it.

Walking up the many flights of stairs, you nod to Vlad who lets you in.

Lucky for you, the first face your eyes land on is the exact one you came looking for.

"Tar!" He immediately looks over in your direction, smiles, and dismisses the Fatui agent he was talking to.

"Well, if it isn't the most beautiful woman in all Teyvat. Come to steal my heart?" He pulls you into a hug and kisses your cheek.

"No need, I already have it," You pull away, giving him a smile.

"I actually came here to see you."

"I'd hope so! Who else would you want to see?" Rolling your eyes, you grab him by his hand and lead him to his office.

"I have a favor to ask of you," The joking atmosphere surrounding you turns heavy as you hold his hands in yours.

"As you know, today is . . . Very important to me. I was wondering if you could get off early tonight? If not, it's okay though. I don't want to trouble you or anything." Childe chuckles and pats your head.

"I know what today is. I already requested an early leave this morning, but they haven't gotten back to me yet. If we're that backed up, I'm not sure I'll be able to," Your face falls a bit, but you smile. He made the effort to try and get off early without you even asking.

He places his hand onto your face and rubs his thumb over your cheek.

"But I promise to make it up to you. If I don't get back too late, we can go up to Mt. Tianheng and watch the lights at night. I know you like to do that when you're upset." The kind smile on his face is only magnified by the gentle look in his eyes. He's always been soft with you, even before you got together.

It was always an odd sight for people to see the two of you interact before you were a couple. He always regards people with the same jokester attitude, especially those he has to keep an eye on. But when he's with you, he may joke around, but is always much more concerned for your wellbeing.

"Thank you, Tar. I really appreciate it." He smirks and laughs.

"You appreciate it, huh? How much?" You roll your eyes again and give him a kiss on the lips. Childe smiles into it and tries to make it deeper, but you pull away with his lips chasing after you.

"Easy there, tiger. Save it for later, huh?"

"So, there's a later?" You lightly smack his chest and pull away from him as he laughs.

"Get back to work, Tar." You turn to leave but stop in the doorway.

"Oh, before I forget, I ran into Chen earlier," The look in Childe's eyes shifts slightly, but you barely notice.

"She mentioned that her brother stopped by here about two days ago, and was wondering if you knew where he went after? He hasn't been home since and she's very worried."

He ponders for a moment before his eyes light up in realization.

"Now that you mention it, he did say he was headed towards Lingju Pass. Don't know what for though." He shrugs.

"Okay, thank you! I'll be sure to pass it on." You exchange words of love before you leave.

After speaking with Chen, you decided to head towards the countryside. Your conversation with her went about as well as you expected. She seemed distressed and unsure of the information you gave her, but any criticisms were held as she thanked you and left. You hope that she'll be okay and that her brother comes back. Archons know, you understand what it's like to lose a sibling.

You take in a deep breath.

The air in Liyue is unlike any other. Once you leave the city and all the warm bodies, it's nothing but gentle breezes and the smell of earth. And the occasional Hilichurl, but you can easily take out a few to preserve the peace.

Walking along a random path in the sand, you reflect.

When you and your sister were young, you would often take walks like these while your parents were arguing. Despite only being a few years older than her, you actively chose to take on a more nurturing role. But after your parents died, you realized just how hard it was to provide for the two of you.

You knew how to use a bow to hunt, but not well, and even though you had your mother's catalyst, you didn't have a vision. Sometimes just showing it off and pretending you had a vision was enough to scare off petty thieves and weak Hilichurls, but it was only a matter of time before that wouldn't be enough.

Unfortunately, that time came all too soon.

The two of you had found an abandoned campsite and you decided to rest for the night. Your sister and you were headed to Mondstadt in search of a distant relative who you believed could help you. But during the night, your sister got thirsty and you were all out of water in your canteen. So you heading out to find a lake close by to fetch some, only to return to see a dark figure escaping into the night and your sister, laying in the tent, unmoving.

You were only a few hours walk to the city.

Sometimes you wonder if you had kept going that night, maybe whoever it was would have never even crossed your path. Your cries for help were heard by knights close by and they gathered your sister. Everyone in the city was welcoming and understanding, and the church gave her a wonderful service.

But nothing could mend the hole in your heart. Thankfully, the family member was able to take you in and trained you to become a knight. But that's not what you wanted. You wanted to find the person who killed your sister. And after completing your training, you left for Liyue and gained your Cryo vision along the way.

You summon your catalyst and flip through the pages. It's strange how magic works and how everything interacts with your vision. Before you, this weapon served your pyro vision-wielding mother. After you gained your vision, all the spells changed to fit the cold rather than the heat. You sigh and close the book. Sifting through it is just going to make you more sentimental. The sky above begins to turn shades of orange and pink as the sun goes down, so you decide to head home.

"I know you did something!" A loud voice yells, not too far from you.

"Chen?" You whisper to yourself and make your way around to see her at the edge of town, yelling at a Fatui agent.

"Calm down, miss Chen. We don't know what you are referring to." She balls her hands into fists, her face twisted in anger.

"You know damn well what I'm talking about! Lingju Pass? He hasn't set foot there since our father died. How dare you make up such lies!" You decide to make your way over to try and calm her down. She's obviously upset, and you know that Fatui agents aren't well versed in the ways of 'feelings.' In fact, most of the ones you've met have all been quite stoic and unconcerned.

"Are you calling the Fatui liars, miss Chen?" You stop, Childe stepping out in front of the other agent.

What is Childe doing out here?

"You Fatui lie about everything! Everyone in Liyue despises your presence here, and this just proves to me how low you people actually are. What did you do to my brother?!" She reaches up to hit Childe, and you run up to her and grab her by her arms. You know she can't hurt him, but if she tries she could get into some serious trouble.

"Chen, listen to me, you have to calm down." She looks up at you with tears streaming down her face but shakes off your grip.

"No! I refuse! He knows something about my brother, I know he does!" She looks at you with pleading eyes.

"Please, _____, tell him. Tell him to tell me where my brother is!" Chen sobs. Tears start to form in your eyes.

"Chen, I'm sorry, but Tartaglia doesn't know," You look up at Childe and are taken aback by the look in his eyes. His eyes are dead, angry, violent as he stares at Chen. He waves his hand, and two Fatui agents come from behind and drag Chen away.

"Let go of me!" She struggles as they hold her arms and pull her through the dirt path. Chen glairs at Childe, digging her feet into the ground to slow them down.

"You're a monster, Harbinger! A monster!" You continue to stare after her as she's dragged away. What just happened? You've known Chen and her brother since you moved here. What could have happened to make this poor girl act like this? You jump when Childe places his hand on your shoulder.

"I'm sorry you had to see that." He wipes the tears from your cheeks and smiles his normal, dashing smile. Nothing like the look he was giving Chen just a moment ago.

"Sometimes those awful rumors spreading about the Fatui make people act irrationally." You look him in the eyes as he holds your face. His eyes are soft and caring now, just how he always looks at you.

"Do you know what happened to her brother?" You ask softly. His eyes darken a bit, but his smile never faults.

"_____, my love, are you questioning me now too? Come on, you know none of that stuff is true, right? I work at a bank, not much else to it." He answers, his voice joking, but there's this undertone you can't quite place and have never heard before. You force a smile and hug him close.

"Your right, I'm sorry for asking. I'm just so concerned for Chen and her brother. Do you know where they're taking her?" He hugs you back, tight, and kisses your forehead.

"I think you should just leave it be for now. Go home and get some rest. I should be getting off work soon, and we can do what I promised. How's that sound?"

"Good." You lean up and give him a kiss. His voice drops low as he whispers in your ear.

"I love you, _____. Don't ever forget that."

And he leaves before you can reply. A chill goes down your spine as you watch him leave, and it's not from your vision. You've never seen Childe like that before, even when he interacts with the Traveler. It made you freeze in place, made your blood run cold, and had your heart beating faster with fear all at the same time. That was Harbinger Childe, not your Tartaglia. You rub your hands along your upper arms to calm yourself. You never want to experience that again.

Taking a deep breath, you reach into your pocket to grab your handkerchief, but pull out the coin Chen had given you instead. All it does is remind you that once again you failed to protect someone you cared about. Poor Chen is scared and afraid, and you're positive that Childe's reaction did not help her any.

But as you hold up the coin, you notice a faint glow emanating from around the outer edge which turns the intricate patterns into Liyuian Characters.

'Let the truth be revealed.'

What does this mean? You remember Chen telling you the story of the coin, but it was just that. You've never heard of any coins gifted by travelers before, and it definitely wasn't a common folk tale.

You shove it back into your pocket and rush home.

The sun is almost fully down, and the stars begin to light your way as you walk hastily down the path. Once your house is in sight, you pick up the pace and run inside.

The glow from the coin is brighter now, illuminating your darkening house. How does one even make a wish on a coin?

"I want to see the truth, but I don't know how," The glow of the coin shifts and changes colors in your hands, giving off an almost mystical wave of magic you've never felt before. Whoever made this coin had to have been powerful. You take a deep breath and look at the coin with determination.

"Show me the truth!" The glow envelopes you and when you open your eyes, you're shocked at what lays before you. The dark figure that haunts your dreams at night looms over your dead sister, red-stained blade in hand and a mask over his face.

You step closer, the classic mask of the fatui on the hooded mans' face making his eyes glow white in the darkness. His stature is much smaller than yours, and his outline seems to be that of a boy. At the time it would have been easy for you to confuse him with a man, being he would have been taller than you. But now that you're an adult, you can clearly see his youth. He smirks and laughs down at your little sister's body while whipping the knife on his sleeve.

"You should never have crossed the Fatui." Your heart drops as the young boy removes his mask revealing ocean blue eyes. The eyes of your lover that you adore on the face of the person that you've despised for years. A woman appears next to him, the same woman you've seen him speak to on many occasions but have never spoken to yourself.

"Good work, Tartaglia. You've proven yourself useful to the Tsaritsa after all. But your job here is not done," Childe looks up at the taller woman, his face determined.

"The other daughter has left to fetch water. Unfortunately, there are too many knights around on patrol to take her. Dispose of the body, and return at once." Childe bows to the woman and she smiles wickedly.

"Yes, Signora. Anything for the Tsaritsa." She leaves, and Childe begins to wrap up the young girl's body in a blanket. He stops suddenly, lifting his head up as young _____ approaches from over the hill. Childe smirks, fixing his mask and hood back on properly.

"Until next time, _____." He says and begins to run.

You gasp as the light invades your sight again and you're returned to the present. Your heart is beating a mile a minute and your breathing begins to pick up. The realization is overwhelming, and the shock is preventing you from crying.

Tartaglia was the one this whole time? It can't be, it just can't! You love him, and he loves you, he says so all the time. Has he lied to you this whole time? Has he just been keeping you close to screw with you before breaking your heart and killing you? That coin has to be lying. There's no way your Tar would ever do something like that, especially to you! He tells you everything. There are no secrets between the two of you.

Right?

The clock on the wall says that it's seven-o-clock, usually when Childe gets off of work. You don't want to be here; you can't be here. How can you face him after seeing that, even if it was a lie? You quickly run up to your shared bedroom and grab your adventuring bag, filling it with few essentials.

Where will you even go? There's nowhere in Liyue where Childe can't find you. Even across Teyvat, the Fatui have eyes and ears. You just need some time to reflect, get your barrings, and confront him. If you'll confront him. This has to be some kind of joke, or lie placed by some unknown power to question your love for him. There's no way he could have-

"What are you doing, _____?" You gasp, started by Childe suddenly behind you, blocking the exit to your room.

"Tar, you scared me!" You say shakily, holding your bag close to your chest. He smiles his usual caring smile at you, but all you can see is the smirk he held while staring down at your little sister.

"Sorry, my love. I got off of work early like I said I would. Is that why you have your bag?" His ocean blue eyes dart down to your bag and back up to you again. You subconsciously grip the bag tighter, Childe noticing.

"N-No. I accepted a commission last minute." The lie slips out like acid on your tongue.

You've never lied to him before, and it feels wrong. But you have to get out of here. Every alarm bell in your body is screaming at you to run as fast as you can away from the man you love.

His brow furrows a bit with concern and he takes a step closer to you, but you take one back.

"This isn't about what happened today, is it?" He sighs and shakes his head.

"I'm sorry if I scared you, it's just I don't like it when people falsely accuse me of things. I kinda slipped into Harbinger mode for a sec there." He laughs, again trying to come closer to you, you step back.

"Are they false though?" The question falls from your lips before you realize it, and Childe's eyes widen in surprise.

"_____, you can't be serious? You know I would never lie to you-"

"How do I know that, Childe?" You've never called him Childe, and it shows from the shock on his face when you do.

"What are you going on about? I could never-"

"Get away from me!" You yell at the Harbinger, tears finally falling from your eyes. There's no way you could be near him like this, knowing that he could have . . .

"Why? I love you, I won't hurt you." You try to steady your breathing as he slowly inches closer, treating you as of your a wild animal he wants to tame.

"You don't love me." You shake your head, gripping your backpack with white knuckles.

"What?" The question comes out as a whisper from the man's mouth in disbelief, hoping he didn't hear you properly.

"You don't love me!" You say one again, louder, confirming what he has hoped wasn't true.

"_____," Childe tries to come closer, but you shove past him and run to the front door. Before you can grab the handle, Childe grabs you by the shoulders and spins you around.

"Please, _____," His eyes are glassy with unshed tears as he gazes into your own.

"Tell me what I did to make you think this way?" You sob, hands pushing on his chest to break free but failing. You can barely breathe as the sobs rack through your body.

"You-" Trying to get the words out only makes you cry harder as the realization hits you. All the rumors are true. The Fatui are evil, conniving, and uncaring. They kill, pillage, experiment, torture, and don't care about who they have to step on to get their way. And your boyfriend, the love of your life, the man you wanted to marry and start a family of your own with, is one of them.

"You killed my little sister!" Your hands ball into fists and punch his chest as hard as you can, but in your state, you have barely any power.

"My baby sister is dead because of you! How could you?" You managed to get out through your tears, finally breaking down in the arms of the man you've despised for years.

Childe stares at you, unbelieving. He pulls you into a tight hug, crying on your shoulder, continuously apologizing. Never in your life have you seen Childe cry. Even when talking about how much he misses his family or his country, the farthest he gets is a sentimental smile and longing. Never have you thought you'd see him cry either. It's almost enough to make you forget that he's practically admitted to the murder.

He killed your only sister. How do you know he's sincere with his tears as he holds you close and begs you not to go? You've seen him lie before, never to you, but if he kept this secret for so long, what else has he been hiding? But none of that matters right now. The man you've been searching for years for, who you wanted to kill with your own bare hands, is the same person holding you so tenderly now.

How could you forget the countless nights you've woken up from nightmares of that boy coming to kill you and finish what he stared, only for Tartaglia to wake you up and hold you close, promising that he'd protect you? Every year when you mourn your sister and confide in him about how you were going to find that monster no matter what it took, did he fear you'd ever find out and kill him?

Is that why he kept you close for so long, to make sure you'd be too weak for him with love to ever even try? How can you love someone who killed your sister? It's easy to just assume you'd hate him, but for some odd reason, a little voice in the back of your mind is telling you to trust him and love him like you always had.

Another voice is telling you to end his life with no mercy and finally bring your sister to the peace she deserves.

Gathering up your strength, you manage to push him off of you.

"_____, no," He's in a state you've never seen before, face wet with tears, nose running, eyes puffy. But, he doesn't try to pull you back in.

You swiftly grab your bag and leave the house and Childe behind.

-------------

"_____," Your cousin John calls your name, pinching the bridge of his nose. He watches as you continuously use your vision to destroy training dummies.

"You continue this and the knights aren't going to have anything left to train with." You stop temporarily to glare at him.

"I'm training."

"So it seems." He watches as you continue your 'training.'

"You know, this doesn't seem healthy. I'm no doctor or anything, but, maybe you should, like, not?" You sigh irritated and cross your arms.

"Not what, John?" He gestures to the broken wood pieces scattered around the courtyard. You roll your eyes.

"I'm doing no worse than the average rookie knight!" John nods, leaning up against the wall.

"Yeah, yeah, except no. Why? Thank you for asking, cause your not a rookie and you're upset, at what? I don't know because you refuse to tell me. All I know is that my cousin is back after being gone for three years and the-," John looks around before stepping closer and lowering his voice.

"The Fatui in town have been eying us up everywhere we go. What the hell happened while you were in Liyue?" You bite your lip and message your wrists. The tips of your fingers have begun to turn purple from the cold, but you hardly seem affected. John pats you on the back and leads you inside the knight's headquarters.

"Look, I know we were never very close, and when you lived with us, we barely spoke, but I'm here now. We're not kids anymore, _____." The two of you sit down in the library. The three years you lived with your uncle and cousin were your worst. They treated you nice, but you were grieving and took it out on them and many training dummies. It seems you've done the same again.

"I'm sorry, it's just . . ." What happened with Childe months ago is still fresh on your mind. You haven't seen him since you left that night, and you aren't sure if you want to. You're conflicted. You thought coming back to Mondstadt would help you clear your mind and help you decide what to do, but you can't, and it's frustrating.

Despite how hard you've tried . . . You still love Tartaglia with all of your heart. But you can't forget what he did. You could never forgive him either. You've held hatred for this man for six years now, and every waking moment has been used to devise a plan to find him and kill him. But you can't kill him; not when you still hold these feelings.

If this was his goal, then he succeeded. You know he knows you're in Mondstadt. As John said, the Fatui have had their eyes on you since you showed up. You wouldn't be surprised if they all have you listed as a threat. After all, being one of their high-ranking officer's vengeful lover with intent and reason to kill would put anyone on a list.

But, with that said, he hasn't tried to contact you. No letters, no passing of words, hell, no carrier pigeons. He's extra enough to do that. And this has caused you to feel even more upset. Cause you still love the man, and there's some hope still there that he meant what he said and he does love you and the fact he hasn't done anything is killing you.

"_____, you good?" You snap out of your daze and nod.

"Yeah, I was just thinking."

"You seem to be doing a lot of that lately. Please, what's going on with you?" You decide it's best to tell your cousin the truth.

You explain to him the situation. How you fell in love, what life was like for you the three years you were gone, the coin, and finding out the killer's identity. John looks at you in shock.

"Wow, that's a lot. And this is why you came back?"

"Yeah, I know. I should have come back sooner to at least visit, but," John cuts you off and waves his hands.

"No, you're fine. I mean, it would have been nice to see you, but that's irrelevant right now. You found out your boyfriend, a Fatui Harbinger, was the one that killed your sister, and you're here? Doing what? Destroying Favonius property?" You agree hesitantly.

"I mean, when you put it like that, it sounds odd."

"No, _____, odd is an understatement. Why are you here? You should be getting answers, slapping people, storming Snezhnaya! Actually, don't do that last one, that could get us in a lot of trouble."

"True," You agree.

"Honestly, I don't know what to do. Do I confront him? I mean, if he did kill her, which I'm about 90% sure at this point that he did, do I get revenge? I've wanted to for years, but I know that I could never kill him." John takes your hand in his and speaks with sincerity.

"You love him, I get that, but you can't let that get in the way of things."

"No, I mean, I literally couldn't kill him. He's a beast in battle, and could probably end me without even blinking. I've seen him take on multiple ruin guards in seconds, like, he's on a whole nother level." You sigh and put your head in your hands.

"But even despite that, I do still love him. At this point, I feel the best thing to do is to just move on. Go my own way and let him go his."

"And what about your sister, huh? Just gonna forget about her?" You look at him questioningly.

"Look, you need to at least get closure. Obviously, he doesn't want you dead, because you would have been so by now. I can't even tell you how many times the Fatui could have nabbed you, gagged you, and sacked you since you've been back."

"Gee, thanks John, that really makes me feel better about the situation." He rolls his eyes.

"Talk to the man, _____. There will always be a home here waiting for you to come back to." Maybe your cousin is right? If Childe did want you dead, you know damn well he has the power to have made it happen. But how would you even react when you see him? The only way to find out is to get it over with.

With newfound enthusiasm, you jump up from your position and slam your hands on the table.

"Alright, I'm gonna go! I'm gonna talk with Tartaglia and I'm gonna punch him at least once!"

"That's the spirit!" A series of loud shooshes sound around the library and you slowly sit back down.

"Sorry!"

You and your cousin John devise a plan over the next few days. You're still unsure about this whole thing, but with encouragement from John, you gain the confidence you need to push through.

In the end, you decide the best thing to do is to sneak out of Mondstadt without any Fatui seeing you. It's still dangerous to speak with him, and the two of you decide the safest thing is to get him unprepared and off guard. If he's not expecting you, he has no time to plan. Not that he needs a plan to kill you, he could just do it. But still-

As the sun seeps down past the hills and flatlands of Mondstadt, John and you make your way out of headquarters and down to the main part of town.

"You know what sounds so amazing right now? A tall mug of cider from Angel's Share!" John exclaims and grabs your arm. The two of you practically run towards the tavern, gaining looks from the other citizens.

"Cool it, John," You whisper yell to him as you head inside.

"You wanna actually look suspicious?" He laughs, sitting down at a table in the back.

"Sorry if I'm not good at being convincing. Dad always said acting would be my downfall."

"When would you ever have to act to be a knight?" He shrugs his shoulders.

"Right now?" Okay, he has a point. Merely minutes after you sit down, two Fatui agents walk in after, taking a table far enough away, but close enough to keep you in their sights.

"Don't worry, _____," Your cousin says, noticing your worried expression.

We'll get you out of here."

John waves his hand and gains the attention of Master Diluc as he's walking around the tavern.

"We'd like two Valberry Whiskey's please!" Your cousin asks loudly and winks. Diluc rolls his eyes and heads towards the back of the tavern, getting the 'drinks.'

It was a miracle and a half that John was able to convince Master Diluc to help you. But John said he owed him a favor. For what, you have no idea. Not even a second later, a young bard runs over to your table and slams his hands down.

"What did you just order?"

"Uh," You look to your cousin for guidance. The drink was simply a code, not an actual order.

"Valberry Whiskey?" The young bard looks at you in amazement. He's clearly drunk, but the sheer excitement in his eyes seems to sober him up enough to eagerly rush to the bar counter.

"A new drink! And Diluc didn't tell me?!" His shouts of joy gain the attention of the entire bar.

"A new drink?!"

"One not on the menu?"

"Master Diluc!"

Your cousin and you share a look as the crowd goes wild, rushing towards the front bar and to the back looking for Diluc to inquire about this new drink. The few Fatui agents that had followed you in stand up from their seat to get a better view of you and John. John grabs your arm and pulls you into the crowd, the Fatui agents desperately searching for your whereabouts.

"This way, _____." He pulls you farther and farther away from the Fatui till you feel another hand grab you and pull you out of the back entrance to the tavern.

"Hey, watch your hands, buddy!"

"Would you rather still be in there then, _____?" You smile nervously up at Diluc, who's handing you a bag and cloak.

"Things didn't exactly go as planned, huh?" The redhead smirks and crosses his arms.

"I knew that bard would be in here tonight. Drunk off his ass, he wouldn't be able to resist the call of a new drink item." You laugh, pulling the hood over your head.

"Thank you, Diluc." He gives you a rare smile and nods. You begin to walk off but stop, looking back at the tavern owner.

"Hey Diluc, what was the favor for?" Diluc sighs and pinches between his eyes.

"I'd rather not talk about it."

__________________

The journey back to Liyue is a tiring one. It seems a lot closer than it actually is on the map, but heading to the main harbor is always a task. Thankfully, you're able to make your rations last the whole trip, and as you enter the harbor in the wee hours of the night, you smile at the familiar buildings. You may have only been gone for a few months, but this was your home for the last three years.

Your home with Tartaglia . . . You pull your hood farther down your head and try to remain in the shadows. Despite the time of night, the area is still bustling with people. Merchants making deals, ships delivering goods, the whole nine yards.

You flatten yourself against a wall as a few Fatui agents walk past. The place is absolutely crawling with Fatui, even more so than usual. Could it have something to do with you? You doubt it. Harbinger or not, Tartaglia could get in serious trouble for using Fatui resources in such a way.

You carefully slide through cracks and crevises, branches and bushes, trying to stay out of any Fatui sights. Eventually, you find yourself on the outskirts of the city, not far from your shared home. It surprisingly takes a lot from you to not run straight for it. You miss your house. You miss your bed. You miss Tartaglia.

But now is not the time to get sentimental!

You still need to confront him about what he did. And depending on his answer, one of you may not make it through the night. You keep yourself stealthy as you enter the house from the back. He's not home, which is good. But the place is in disarray. Furniture turned upside down, plates smashed against walls, everything caked in dust. It's hard to believe he's been living here if he even has been.

If that's the case, you may have to go looking for him. You look around the house at the disaster. He may have been trying to look for something; maybe a clue to what you had planned or something to use against you.

With that in mind, you run up the stairs to the master bedroom and open the closet. You fear the worst but are surprised to find your sister's belongings still in place.

Surely he would have found them in here.

The bedroom isn't as bad as the bottom floor, though still a mess. The bed is unmade, with a small pile of your clothes on your side of the bed, and his clothes on the floor. All of your things, besides the clothes, are still neatly in their places. Pictures of you and him together that were once on the walls are now on his nightstand, face up and smudged with fingerprints.

"What the hell happened here?" The sound of the front door opening startles you. Could that be Childe? There's no way he's living like this!

Footsteps move across the floor, into the kitchen, into the living room, and slowly up the stairs. Whoever it is, your about to face them.

The door opens slowly, almost torturously so. Soon, the sunken and sullen face of your lover is in your view, and even faster, your on the floor with a knife made of hydro to your throat. Your hood continues to obscure your identity as Childe pins you down.

"Bold of you to break into the home of a Fatui Harbinger! What did you expect?" With the pressure from the knife digging deeper and deeper into your skin, you freeze the hand wrapped around his holding the knife, and kick your leg out. Childe falls over, dropping his weapon which shatters on impact. Before you can get your bearings, he's lunging at you again. He grabs you from behind and holds you in a chokehold.

"Your fast, but you'll never be fast enough!" You gasp for air, holding onto his arm as it's wrapped around your neck. He's trying to kill you, you know he is. All the times you've sparred with him, you knew he was holding back, but he's definitely not this time. Even so, his hold on you is weak. Weak for him, at least.

You rear your elbow into his stomach as hard as you can knocking him back and you summon your catalyst. As he said, he's faster than you, but before he can get back, you place a wall of ice between him and yourself. It's not enough to hold him back for long, but enough to catch your breath. He laughs as he can hear you choking, attempting to regain your oxygen.

"You think this little wall will stop me?" He attacks the wall with his fist, making a section crumble. Your breathing is fast, but you can't seem to gain enough breath to speak. As he crumbles your wall piece by piece, you pull back your hood and lean on the bedroom wall behind you. Finally, he lands the finishing blow and the ice dissipates in a gust of cryo magic. The crazed look of bloodlust vanishes from his face the instant he sees you, hand on your throat, and your breath heavy.

"___-," He can hardly finish his whisper as he lets out a shaky breath. With the tense atmosphere suddenly calm, you're able to regain your breath and look up at the man. His skin a pale and his eyes are dull. He has large dark circles under his eyes and he looks a bit thinner than normal.

"_____," He manages to get out, still shocked you're actually here.

"Are you okay?" You shake your head.

"You haven't seen me in months and that's the first thing you say to me?" He rubs the back of his neck and looks down, ashamed.

"I didn't know it was you. I'm sorry if I hurt you." You can hardly believe what you're seeing. He seems broken, utterly defeated. If he hadn't fought you just now, you'd assume he'd fall over with the breeze.

Looking at him now, it's hard to believe he's the same man that killed your sister.

"We need to talk." He nods, refusing to meet your eyes.

"You need to tell me the truth, Tar," He takes in a shuddering breath at your words.

"All these years, I've been beside you. I've stood up for you, I've loved you. I told you all my darkest secrets and nightmares. Not once did I ever lie to you."

Tears come to his eyes just as they do yours. He bites his lip to prevent the tears from falling. You step closer to him, dropping your cloak, and put your hands up to his face. He flinches away from you but relaxes when your palms cup his cheeks and he finally looks you in the eyes.

"Over the past few months, I've thought long and hard about what I wanted to say to you. And no matter what scenario I came up with, I could never tell if I was doing the right thing. But, even though I carry some semblance of anger, I know that what I feel for you is real. And with that, I still hold hope that you feel the same and it wasn't all just a lie."

He grabs your hands, the tears now falling one by one down his pale cheeks.

"I swear to all the Archons that I love you! I never lied about that!" You hesitate for a moment, blinking away your own tears.

"And though I don't want to, I believe you," You rub your thumbs across his face, clearing some of the tears.

"But I need you to tell me everything." Tartaglia closes his eyes. He never dreamed in a million years he'd have to tell you this story. He'd hoped that you'd live in blissful ignorance for the rest of your life with him. But the gods had another plan for him and you, and he prays that at least one of them will let him keep you. Even if that's a selfish request.

"I joined the Fatui when I was young. I was constantly trying to prove myself to Signora and the Tsaritsa that I was willing to do anything they asked me. I still am," He looks at you with regretful and sorrowful eyes as he recalls the past.

"Your parents had fled Snezhnaya when you were born, because of a debt they racked up with the Fatui. When they were found in Fontaine, it was revealed that they were working for a group of rebels intent on infiltrating Snezhnaya. It was my job to take you and your sister to use as leverage on your parents. But, your sister fought back," You release his face and look away, finding it harder to keep eye contact with him.

"I wasn't as skilled as I am now, and I panicked. But La Signora said I did a good job. I didn't know that your parents had already been killed by the rebels, and neither did the Fatui. Not until after we had left you. At that point, there was no reason to continue after you. But you were never forgotten about. And when you came to Liyue, I was instructed to keep an eye on you," Childe lifts his arms up and places his hands on your shoulders.

"But I never expected to fall in love with you." You look into his ocean blue eyes and are overcome by the warmth they hold for you.

"The day I met you, I could feel it, and I tried so hard to forget about it, but you were just so . . . Amazing, and beautiful, and kind. I never expected that from you. You never once judged me or ridiculed me, even though you knew who I was. I thanked the Archons every day that you came into my life, and I prayed that you'd never find out what I'd done."

A sob breaks through as he wipes the tears running down his face. All the years you harbored hatred for this man, you never once thought about what he could have been going through. It's true that this doesn't excuse his actions, but to know that he truly regrets what he did brings you some kind of closure. In the end, revenge would have never made you feel better. Your sister wouldn't have wanted that.

You love Tartaglia with all your heart, and in this world, it's better to forgive than to let it eat away at you any longer.

"Tartaglia," His name comes out as a whisper with your breath, but he hears you loud and clear. The fear of rejection in his eyes tells you everything you need to know as you carefully speak to him.

"I forgive you." He cries, pulling you to his chest and you hug him back. Unfortunately for him, you weren't finished.

"But, I need some time to think about this. I love you; I never stopped loving you, and I always will," You pull back and smile at him before gently kissing his chapped lips.

"I'm going back to Mondstadt, but I'll be back. You just need to give me some time." He smiles as best he can and nods enthusiastically.

"I'd give you all the time in the world if I could." He moves to kiss you again, but you put a finger up to his lips to stop him.

"Save it for later, Tar." He laughs, looking back up at you with bright eyes.

"So, there's a later?"

(A little something extra. It doesn't quite fit to be an ending, but more like an epilogue just tying things together I guess lol.)

___________________

You sigh as you sling your bag over your shoulder. It's been a good few months back in Mondstadt after your reconciliation with Childe, and you've decided it's time to go home. You've kept in regular contact with him since you've been here, writing letters to each other like new lovers. You found the whole thing quite cute, despite the circumstances. He's been regarding you with caution, taking things one step at a time, and never pushing you past any limits you set. You're grateful for that.

"You sure you wanna go back? You can always stay a bit longer, just to give yourself a bit more time to think it over." John says, arms crossed and head down. You two have grown closer over your time spent here. It's a shame to think you were so caught up in your misery to be blind to the best friend you could have had. And it's tough to say goodbye, now that you've grown attached.

"I'm sure. You don't have to miss me too much, ya know? I'll be back to visit, and I'll write every week!" John huffs.

"You better, or I'm coming over there and kicking that Fatui's ass for keeping you away! I don't care how many ruin guards he can take on!" You laugh and pull him into a hug.

"I'm gonna miss you." He hugs you back, holding you tight.

"Yeah, I know." You roll your eyes and wave goodbye to the family you didn't realize you had.

Once back in Liyue, you get settled into your home with Childe. Thankfully, he cleaned up the mess he made while you were gone. He had said he was so distraught at the thought of you leaving him, he trashed the place in anger. Not anger from you, but anger at himself. He was afraid you'd think he was a monster, that he was heartless, and that you'd never want to see him again.

He was relieved when he heard you were in Mondstadt. There, he could keep an eye on you. One of the things he was afraid of was you doing something to yourself due to the pain of it all . . . If you did that, he wouldn't know how to cope. And when he received word that you had disappeared from Mond, well, he thought that fear had come true. But in the end, things worked out. You could never forget what he did, nor do you want to. It's something you have to live with, just like he does, and it's up to you to put it aside.

You know there are many things he's done that he's not proud of. Many things of which he promises to tell you when he's ready. And you'll be there to listen as he spills his heart out to you.

You take in a breath of air as you enter the harbor, smelling the salty water of the ocean and the wonderful herbs being brought in from traveling merchants. You'll never get over these smells.

"_____!" You look over your shoulder, surprised as Chen runs over to you. You haven't seen her since the incident outside of town.

"Chen! Are you okay?" She smiles and hugs you.

"I'm doing great! My brother and I have been selling a lot more of our goods since he's been back, and business has been booming!"

"Your brother?" You tilt your head.

"Yes!" She nods enthusiastically.

"He did go to Lingju Pass as Childe had said. It turns out, he had a buyer out there but didn't want to tell me in case the deal went south. I overreacted. . ." She puts her head down in shame.

"All the rumors about the Fatui got to my head, and I assumed the worst. But Childe went out and found my brother for me. Can you please tell him I said thank you? Also that I'm sorry. I really owe him one."

You pat her on the head, relieved.

"Of course, Chen." She reaches into her pocket and pulls something out.

"For payment-"

"No!" You shove her hand away.

"Gotta go! I'm late to see Tar!" You sprint off, leaving a confused Chen in your wake.