#only real mid 14th century kids know what its like to have to have that tag blocked smh

[confusedmothboy]

SOUND ON!! THIS IS ANIMATED TO A POEM!1!

if this. gets fucking muted like it did the three times i tried to post it on tiktok. im gonna crash out so hard yall will never hear from me again

[theladyjojogrant]

The Missy Chronicles and why it’s one of the best Doctor Who books ever made.

Is it as hilarious as it sounds? Even more so. 

I just read The Missy Chronicles and I still can’t believe how perfect it is. Each story brings something unique to Missy’s character and adds some interesting things to Doctor Who canon that you really, no I mean really, don’t want to miss. 

(Below is a short synopsis of each story and some memorable quotes/things that happened. If you don’t want spoilers, come back and read this once you’ve read the book!) 

1. Dismemberment by James Goss

Basically, the Master always goes to this sketchy gentlemen’s club after he regenerates to just chill and be around other morally questionable people. But this time there’s a problem. The Master (as Missy, though she hasn’t decided on her name at this point) goes to the club like usual after her regeneration, but gets kicked out because she’s a woman. The rest of the story is her carrying out very extravagant plots for revenge on each of the members of the club, including, but not limited to: making it rain blood; tying a man to train tracks, marrying him, and then letting him get run over; and last but not least, freeing an African American slave and letting her poison the food at the club’s big annual celebration, telling them they can be cured if they eat some paper, and then telling them after they eat the paper that she was lying. 

Favourite quotes:

About Missy: “Her eyes possessed that cold burn you got from holding ice.” 

Missy: “So sorry I’m late. Just been running over a maths teacher with a milk float. You know how it is.” (GUYS I’M NOT CRAZY MY THEORY WAS RIGHT AND IT’S NOW CONFIRMED, MISSY KILLED DANNY!!!!!) 

Generally, this story was funny and very typically Missy. Also the African American slave Missy saved is the one who eventually comes up with the name Missy, and the only person from the club that Missy didn’t kill was a certain man named Dr. Skarosa...

2. Lords and Masters by Cavan Scott 

The time lords recruit Missy to go on a mission for them, so they hijack the Eye of Harmony in her TARDIS and send a time lady to hold a gun to her head. Basically she has to figure out what’s causing some strange time disturbances, and it turns out this doctor genetically engineered a creature that could travel in space and time and kept it in stasis so that he could gain the power from its energy or something like that. Missy was supposed to kill the creature, but instead she manipulated the time lady to kill the doctor, kept the creature, and miniaturized then killed the time lady and sent her back to the General on Gallifrey. 

Favourite quotes:

“Missy had places to go and people to subjugate.” 

“Missy gave her the look she usually reserved for simpletons and UNIT personnel.” 

Not too much went on story-wise, but it was interesting to see how Missy dealt with being pushed around by the time lords. She also gets her first “companion” in this story: Yayani, the time lady who’s supposed to kill her if she doesn’t obey the time lords’ instructions. 

3. Teddy Sparkles Must Die! by Paul Magrs

Yes, it is just about as strange as it sounds. Missy becomes the governess of three children in early/mid-20th century England. The children are suspicious of her and go through her things, only to find a sparkly teddy bear who’s really an alien who can distort time and complicated stuff to grant wishes. The teddy bear lets them go to crazy places like the moon and Missy gets the kids out of trouble. In return for her rescuing them, she wants the kids to wish to grow up to be powerful people in the world, and the kids do it because they don’t really get it. So they grow up and become powerful people, forgetting about Missy. Then Missy comes back when they’re older and demands they give her the world. Teddy Sparkles (the alien bear) thwarts Missy’s plan by rewriting time and sending the kids back to their childhood, though he also accidentally incorporates crazy creatures that Missy told the kids stories about into the world. Teddy Sparkles uses up the rest of his energy/life to set everything right again, even inventing a fictional story about a governess with a carpet bag and an umbrella who takes children on fantastic adventures so that Missy will become famous, which is something she hates because she gets crowded by people gawking at her. Missy leaves, and in the end one of the children grows up to be a grandmother, and Teddy Sparkles shows up as a Christmas present for one of her grandchildren. 

I didn’t write down any really memorable quotes from this one, but the whole Mary Poppins connection was great, and I found it interesting that Missy actually “lost” in this one; it wasn’t from her point of view at all, either. 

4. The Liar, the Glitch, and the War Zone by Peter Anghelides

This one is pretty complicated to explain because it’s very timey-wimey, but basically Missy runs her TARDIS into some Gryphons (after escaping from the Daleks at the end of The Witch’s Familiar) and then crash lands in 21st century Venice. Through a series of things happening (time rifts and stuff are involved), Missy’s dematerialisation circuit ends up in 14th century Venice and she goes back in time with a random girl (Antonia) and also tries to destroy 21st century Venice in order to get her TARDIS working again and escape the Gryphons. After the TARDIS starts working again Missy time rams her TARDIS and everything undoes itself, so 21st century Venice goes back to normal. Missy tries to leave Antonia in 14th century Venice with her dead friend who fell through a time rift, but Antonia mysteriously ends back up in the TARDIS. More on that in a sec because...

GUYS. THE THIRTEENTH DOCTOR IS IN THIS STORY. NO JOKE. Missy discovers her dematerialisaiton circuit went back in time when she sees an ad for it being on display in a museum. She tries to ask where it came from, but all the employees keep telling her to talk to the curator. So finally she sets up an appointment, and that’s where I immediately became suspicious. The curator’s office is very thoroughly described, and while the combination of old and new stuff (including a plague doctor’s mask) could be telling of the Doctor (I mean, Day of the Doctor and the Curator, hello???), it also could just be a typical curator. But what set me off was that the curator is never physically described at all. There are other clues (before an obvious reveal at the end of the story.) Through the whole story people keep calling Missy “signora” and she insists that she wants to be called “signorina” instead. The curator calls Missy “signorina” without any indication from Missy. And as the curator is helping Missy find out where the dematerialisation circuit came from, she says “I do enjoy this kind of research myself. It’s a real trip into the past.” Missy also runs into a plague doctor back in the 14th century when she’s getting her circuit back. Then at the end it’s made really clear. Antonia shows up in Missy’s TARDIS (after Missy tried to abandon her) saying “If it wasn’t for her, no one would have seen me again.” She then gives Missy a note: “...two short paragraphs of neat handwriting chastised Missy for her lack of caution, and told her that she would need to try much harder.” Missy goes back to the curator’s office and finds it empty except for the plague doctor’s mask. All the curator’s secretary can tell her is (and it’s the last line of the story): “The doctor doesn’t work here any more.” (*SCREAMS*) 

Also, Missy decides to call one of the Gryphons “Hermione” and then says that she’s a Slytherin girl herself because she goes for the bad boys. She also says that she sees some Severus Snape in herself. 

5. Girl Power! by Jacqueline Rayner 

I don’t know how Jacqueline Rayner can write perfect Doctor Who stories. Every. Single. Time. 

This story is not told in traditional narrative fashion, but initially through messages that Nardole and the Twelfth Doctor send back and forth to each other. Nardole is guarding Missy in the vault and is worried when she seems to be putting together some sort of plot. The Doctor tells him to go along with it, and soon enough Missy is contacting important and influential women all throughout history to create MADAM, Missy’s Army for the Demotion of All Men. (I’m still dying over that XD). She creates a group on “Spacebook” and chats with these women, including Henry VIII’s wives, Joan of Arc, Lady Jane Grey, Elizabeth I, Agatha Christie, and Jane Austen. Basically Missy just wants them all to kill all the men on the planet. But the Doctor joins the chat pretending to be Circe and gets all the women to leave the chat. He and Missy end up talking because Missy of course knows it’s him, and the Doctor thinks she came up an elaborate plot so that she could escape the Vault. Missy sort of accidentally confesses, however, that she was trying to have the oppressed (women) fight their oppressors (men), like the Doctor would do. 

Favourite quotes: 

Literally the entire story. The synopsis is vague because the meat of the story is Missy writing all these feminist things about how to respond to stupid man questions and how to do things that women can’t do at certain points in time (like vote, own property, etc.) and sending them to the members of MADAM. At the beginning of the story Nardole relates to the Doctor things that Missy has asked for, and the Doctor approves or disapproves them. These things include: hairspray, history books about important women (which was where she got the MADAM idea), marshmallows, a campfire (to roast the marshmallows; however, the Doctor doesn’t approve that one because “If she’s still got that can of hairspray, we could all be in big trouble.”), a tiger, and sherbert lemons. 

Missy: “It has come to my notice that being a woman isn’t just about the addition of some wobbly bits and a sudden inability to grow a goatee.” 

Missy on her Spacebook profile under the section ‘other names:’ “Professor Thascales, Colonel Masters, Reverend Magister, Sir Gilles Estram, Mister Saxon. Look, if I called myself ‘Reggie’ or ‘Dave’ the Doctor never even had the decency to suspect it was me. I used to go to a lot of trouble dressing myself up for him so is it so wrong to want some attention?” 

Missy on her Spacebook profile under the section ‘life events:’ “Born, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died, Died Died, Died, Took over some bloke’s body, Died, Died, Died, Became a human, Stopped being a human, Died, Died, Became a woman, Ruled!”

Missy: “I’m 100% done with human women. Hate the lot of them. Hope they all use lead-based makeup and die.” 

I literally did not stop laughing throughout this entire story. And I really mean that. My abs hurt. 

6. Alit in Underland by Richard Dinnick

Takes place during World Enough and Time/The Doctor Falls. Missy and Simm!Master travel around Floor 507 with Alit, the girl who gave Cyber-Bill the mirror in The Doctor Falls. The Masters (with Alit in tow) take out some Cybermen who come after them and find an elevator to leave the floor. 

Not much plot-wise, as you can see, and it’s a fairly short story. But bantering between the Masters is fantastic, and one of the best parts is Missy and Simm talking about how much they love cartoons. Missy tells him that she and the Doctor watched Frozen together and Simm can’t believe it and keeps judging her for it, when finally Missy tells him to “Let it go.” 

The other interesting and really cool aspect to this story is Missy’s character. She comforts Alit, tells her a story when she’s frightened, and even holds her hand. She also deliberately saves people, but keeps that a secret from Simm. I really like how the final two stories incorporate Missy’s slight moral shift. And the last little bit of the story, and of the book itself, is awesome: 

Simm!Master: “Tell me. Travelling with the Doctor. What is that all about?”

“I was imprisoned. It was the only way out.” 

“So you did have a plan before you ran into me. Get rid of him; betray him?” He licked his lips. “Kill him?” 

“Get rid...?” Missy looked at the Master, and her face became a stony façade. “That has a certain ring to it.” 

...

“Note to self: Get rid of...betray...kill.” Missy nodded. “Yes. I suppose that’s the only way.” 

The Missy Chronicles, everyone. If you have the chance to read it, please do.

[terminaent]

WELCOMING: OH “LIENA” NANA

CAREER INFORMATION: ━✧ SIGNED: March 12th, 2007 ━✧ DEBUT: June 14th, 2014 ( solo ), January 19th, 2010 ( CREEP ) ━✧ GROUP: CREEP ━✧ POSITION: Lead Dancer, Sub Vocalist, Center of Group  ━✧ VOICE CLAIMS: Park Hyomin, Lee Nana, Yoona ━✧RAP VOICE CLAIMS: Hyohyeon, Meng Jia

SOLO DESCRIPTION

Oh Nana, known professionally as Liena Glamour, or mononymously known as Liena, is a South-Korean singer, songwriter, record producer, poet, philanthropist. She is first known as Creep’s ninth member. Taking the position of Treachery: Lead Dancer, Sub Vocalist, Center of Group. Her solo music has been noted by critics for its stylized cinematic quality, its preoccupation with themes of tragic romance, glamour, and melancholia, and its references to pop culture, particularly 1950s and 1960s Americana. 

 Born and raised in poverty, she had no foundations of basic vocal training, and dance lessons until she was scouted by Termina Entertainment, working in a flea market in Dongdaemun-gu, Seoul. From then on, she juggle in both working for a living, and training to be an idol. Her vocal coach admires her raw, unpolished vocals, and praised her for the good quality of her voice, despite not being the vocally strongest in the pool of trainees. Her weapon was her vocal technique. It is something that the coaches don’t want her to lose.   

She was put under Creep, who at that time was only a project group. She became the center of the group due to her outstanding visuals. She was mostly recognized by her face, and not her vocals which was very upsetting for her. She knows she’s not vocally strong as the others at that time, but she at least wanted to be acknowledged by the fans for her voice. There are times where she would ask the other members to train with her  in order to improved. It was until Creep officially became a permanent group in Termina, where she found new hope that there will be years to show her improvement and growth to the fans. 

 Four years after Creep’s debut, Liena made her solo debut. It was self-produced, self-directed as the company wanted her to have freedom to express her music, and tell her story with no one’s help. The goal is for it to be raw, and real. Liena's musical sound has been dubbed "Retro sadcore" by music critics. She elaborated on this in an interview, saying "I wasn't even born in the '50s but I feel like I was there. I write my songs based on my past, and my family’s past, whilst setting it way way back." 

Associated with several styles, Liena's music has been tagged broadly as dream pop or baroque pop, linked to various forms of rock, indie music, and trip hop, and often touching on styles such as hip hop, and psychedelic rock on particular releases. Liena's subsequent releases would introduce variant styles, which employed a guitar-based sound akin to psychedelic and desert rock. She sings about old cars, money, and the bad boys she's always falling for, and while there remains a sepia-toned mid-century flavor to many of these songs. Upon the release of her comeback album, one reviewer characterized Liena's body of work as being "about music as a time warp, with her languorous croons over molasses-like arrangements meant to make clock hands seem to move so slowly that it feels possible, at times, they might go backwards." 

 Liena has been described as a "self-styled gangsta Nancy Sinatra,” “Lolita lost in the hood,” or a “Young stepford housewife who’s heartbroken and ready to murder his cheating husband.” And although it wasn’t well received in mainstream K-pop in Korea for not having an edm, tropical house, or hip hop sound, her music had crossed over internationally, specially in the west. 

BIOGRAPHY

Oh Nana wasn’t born with a silver spoon on her mouth. She lived in poverty with parents who have no stable jobs and more inclined with drug use, and criminal activity. She wasn’t even a planned child. She was the fruit of a one night stand hookup between a reckless hooker and a drunkard, drug addict who works for one of Seoul’s biggest drug lords. Her parents only got married because of her unexpected entry to their directionless lives and unstable relationship. Growing up, she was always the one to blame by both of her parents. Words like ‘Why did I even gave birth to you?” or “Because of you, our lives became worse!” had been heard by her at a young age. For a young age, she had to learn how to grow up and adapt to everyone and everything around her. She learned new things everyday, from good to bad things, just by listening to how her parents argue and talk. 

The good thing that came out of it is that despite all those bad things, is that she has a good heart and soul. Her home life was less than pleasant. Subjected to abuse from both of her parents for most of her life both physical and emotional. Nana tried everything she could to gain the approval of her abusive parents but nothing she ever seemed to do worked. She was only used by her parents to work at a very young age, with no support from both. They only care about the money she’s getting, just so they can use it for their drugs, alcohol and illegal gambling. 

Nana finally gave up trying to please her abusive parents and ran away from home at the age of fourteen. She found somewhat of a home in an abandoned house that was home to squatters and drug addicts and sure it wasn’t pretty, there was no running water, no electricity, and the floor was always covered in broken needles, but this house had something that her abusive home didn’t have. Friends. 

Jinhee and Seokwoo were both were around the same age and who were all going through the same things as Liena and they became close friends. Extremely close friends. It wasn’t normal to see one without the other. Seokwoo was like the little brother that Nana never had and she became very attached to the sweet young kid, where as Jinhee was just like her. She felt an immediate connection to Jinhee. Jinhee became the only person Nana felt she could really trust. Although he could trust Seokwoo too, there were just some things Nana couldn’t tell Seokwoo to spare what little innocence he had left in him. Jinhee and Nana were always getting up to odd jobs together, until their money is enough for the three of them to have a decent apartment together. 

Unlike Jinhee who was always engrossed in her studies trying to get good grades to make a better life for herself and her brother, Nana was only there to get away from her parents, and to pursue a career in music. Something about writing songs and singing just clicked with her. It was relaxing, and  it helped her get out most of her anger whenever  she was frustrated. It became her passion. 

However one day, January 13th to be exact she woke to find Seokwoo and Jinhee gone from her life. Run off in the middle of the night as Jinhee so often said she was going to do. Nana had always thought she’d be going with them to god knows where having a better life is easy to get. Feeling betrayed that the only two people in her life that she trusted had upped and left her without even saying goodbye, she became depressed. She was about to give up, but she already went too far in life with all the struggles she had before just to give up easily. Nana is a fighter. 

One day, whilst working on a flea market selling cheap ice-cold juice drinks, a scouting agent from Termina Entertainment captured her attention after hearing her sing while selling the drinks. She was then approached and as soon as she saw the business card, she saw a light of hope that there is an escape to the hard life that she has. She have nothing to lose so she took the courage and auditioned in Termina. She started training and learned new things. She was diligent and hardworking during her trainee years, despite struggling to be on the same level as the other trainees who had trained before her. 

She trained for over a year and a half before being placed in Creep. She debuted in Creep with the stage name of Liena, which means “a woman as beautiful as a lotus flower” which fits perfectly with her background and life struggles. She is a beautiful lotus flower that always looks so clean and pure against the background of the dirty muddy pond. She became a household name when she debuted as a soloist in 2014, and was known for her pure and beautiful heart through her philanthropy. She knows the struggle and she wanted to help others who are in the same position as she was back then. 

Liena  launched the Lotus Flower foundation in 2014, a non-profit organization that focuses on youth empowerment. The foundation had allowed her to tour in schools over South Korea to speak against bullying. In 2015, Liena joined 200 high school students, policy makers, and academic officials, to discuss ways to recognize and channel emotions for positive outcomes and fight online harassment. Her second solo album’s proceeds were donated to  foundation that helps bring food and relief to the homeless. Her foundation also aims to help children with respiratory diseases. Her foundation has been active since its inception andhas helped thousands of children with special needs. Liena is also an LGBT icon, being a strong supporter for the passage of Korea Equality Foundation, which provides protections on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity, and expression. 

With all her success in both as soloist and as a Creep member, she remained thankful and humble. She also went to visit her parents again and forgave them. She encouraged and helped her parents to stay away from their vices and provided them a new home and built a restaurant for them to work and manage, whilst helping with her foundations as well.

While being in Creep and a soloist, Liena was placed in a sub unit called Pastel Goth where she can showcase her talents in a whole new image, giving her the nickname of "Creep's Chameleon." In the unit, her image was drastically changed into a more cutesy vibe. She was the center, Vocalist, and Lead dancer for the sub unit. Pastel Goth released two singles throughut their career, namely Magic Girl and Aing! before they got discontinued by Termina due to the members' schedule conflicts.