#only one of them was turning out ~okay~ so. i. i got frustrated. erased the other. took this dude's base. now here we are.

[gf2bellamy]

hey girl!

Just read someone talking about a tiktok where the boyfriend sits with his plushies and watches and corrects his girlfriend as she teaches him as a way of studying for exam.

Maybe a PhD!student!reader x early!season!spence with this plot and he gets all cheery and claps whenever she gets a topic right idk

Hope that made sense😶‍🌫️

Love ya! 😘

studying — spencer reid

pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader ( no use of y/n ) content warnings: established relationship, fluff , reader has an exam, earlyseason!spencer <3 a/n: hi hi !! this isnt the first message i've received abt this tiktok video ( i feel like i'm the only one who hasnt seen it?) but its so spencer so i just had to write this <3

You stared at the whiteboard, its surface cluttered with half-erased scribbles, bullet points, and arrows pointing in increasingly uncertain directions.

The markers were beginning to dry out, and your brain too.

You squinted at the words, trying to will them into making sense, but they just sat there smugly, refusing to reorganize into anything remotely coherent.

Behind you, Spencer sat cross-legged on your bed, half-buried in a sea of plushies that had taken up residence there during your all-night study sessions.

He didn’t seem to mind. In fact, you were pretty sure he was enjoying himself.

The way your nose scrunched when you were frustrated, the way you gestured wildly when you finally connected the dots. He loved it when you taught him things, even if he already knew them.

You sighed and dragged a hand through your hair. “Okay, I give up. I’ve explained this same thing four different ways, and I’m still confusing myself.”

Spencer didn’t answer right away.

When you glanced back at him, he was gently repositioning a lopsided stuffed bear, straightening its little bow tie with delicate precision. He caught your gaze and smiled, warm and a little shy.

“You’re not confusing,” he said quietly. “You’re just tired. But I think you're explaining it better than you think you are.”

You let out a breath somewhere between a groan and a laugh, turning around to lean against the edge of your desk. “Then why does it feel like none of it’s sticking?”

“Because you’ve been at this for hours,” he said, shifting slightly and patting the spot on the bed beside him. “Come sit. Let’s go over it again.”

You hesitated, eyeing the whiteboard one last time like it might suddenly throw you a bone. It didn’t.

You had discovered early on in your relationship that Spencer was an excellent study partner—not just because of his eidetic memory, but because of the way he listened. He absorbed information like a sponge, but more than that, he made you feel heard.

When you explained concepts aloud to him, it forced you to articulate them clearly, and his occasional corrections (always gentle) kept you sharp.

With a reluctant sigh, you crossed the room and dropped onto the bed. A stuffed alpaca flopped sideways onto your lap, and Spencer gently rescued it before it fell off the edge.

“This one likes to supervise,” he said with a grin, setting it back beside you like it was part of some official plushie committee.

You couldn’t help but smile. “He looks judgmental.”

“Motivational,” Spencer corrected with a soft laugh. “He believes in you.”

You rolled your eyes but felt your shoulders relax for the first time in hours. He turned toward you, expression open and attentive.

“Okay. Tell me again about the difference between quantitative and qualitative methodology. As if you were explaining it to someone who knows absolutely nothing about it.”

“You do know something about it,” you teased.

“Humor me.”

You exhaled slowly, gathering your thoughts, and launched back into your explanation.

As you spoke, Spencer nodded, asked the occasional gentle question, and—when you got slightly off track—interjected with the quietest correction, always phrased like a suggestion instead of a critique.

It didn’t hurt that he looked at you like you hung the moon.

Every time you nailed a concept—delivered a term with confidence, or remembered an example from your research—he clapped.

Actually clapped.

Not loudly, not obnoxiously—just a few soft, sincere rounds of applause, the kind that made your cheeks flush and your heart squeeze in your chest.

“Well done,” he said softly, his eyes glowing with pride. “You’ve got it.”

You chuckled and glanced at the plushies around him. “I think they’re helping. You’ve got a whole committee of motivational support there.”

Spencer paused, then grinned sheepishly. “Well, they are great listeners.” He reached down to adjust a stuffed elephant’s little bow tie, his eyes gleaming with quiet joy.

You continued explaining. Eventually, your words started flowing smoother, more confidently. You stopped stumbling over the terminology.

By the time you reached the end of your explanation, you felt like maybe—maybe—you actually understood what you were saying.

You stood up again, feeling the need to walk around as you grabbed another marker and began scribbling new diagrams on the whiteboard.

“And then�� that’s it,” you said, your voice more certain now as you stared at the board, watching the last piece of the equation fall into place. You took a deep breath and turned back to Spencer.

His expression was pure warmth—bright eyes, a grin so wide it almost seemed to take up half his face.

"Exactly," he said, his voice soft with admiration, before clapping again—this time with more enthusiasm.

You couldn't help but grin back, your heart swelling with a sense of accomplishment and gratitude.

That smile of his, so genuine and so full of pride, made all the hours of frustration feel worth it. He didn’t look tired—not even slightly. Not after hours of watching you scribble, re-explain, stumble, and try again.

Spencer didn’t show a hint of impatience, and that made you appreciate him even more.

In fact, he looked downright adorable sitting there—cross-legged on your bed, surrounded by plushies, still so full of energy and enthusiasm.

You let out a breath, feeling the weight of the night lifting off your shoulders. You had done it. You got it.

“I think… I might actually get some sleep now,” you said, laughing a little as you leaned against the whiteboard for a moment, suddenly exhausted.

Spencer chuckled softly, setting down the stuffed elephant he’d been gently adjusting for the past few minutes, his eyes twinkling. “Sleep sounds like a good idea. But if you need to go over it one more time, I’m happy to help.”

You shook your head, a fond, tired smile playing at the corners of your mouth. “I think you’ve helped enough for tonight.”

He shrugged lightly, an endearing gesture that made you feel like he was constantly giving you more than you could ever ask for.

"Anytime," he murmured, voice warm like the tea he'd made you three hours ago that now sat cold and forgotten on your nightstand.

You turned back toward the whiteboard, eyeing the chaotic scrawl of diagrams and notes that had once felt like your mortal enemy.

Now, it just looked like progress.

“I think we can erase these,” you mumbled, already reaching for the eraser.

Spencer padded up behind you, quiet as ever, until you could feel him just over your shoulder.

“You sure?” he asked, his voice low and teasing, lips brushing just behind your ear. “Might want to keep it up for nostalgia.”

You rolled your eyes, grinning. “Spencer, it’s a jumbled mess. Half of it looks like it was written during a caffeine-induced breakdown.”

“That’s the charm,” he said, tightening his arms around your waist briefly before releasing you just enough to grab a nearby marker.

“Besides, this little guy deserves a spot in the Smithsonian,” he added, circling a particularly squiggly doodle of a triangle that had somehow gained angry eyebrows and a caption that read ‘Qualitative gremlin.’

You laughed, letting your head fall back against his shoulder for a second. “Oh no, not the gremlin.”

“He has theories,” Spencer said solemnly.

“You are the gremlin,” you shot back, elbowing him gently in the ribs.

Spencer feigned offense, but the grin that lit up his face gave him away. “Rude,” he said.

You finally began to erase the board, slow satisfying swipes of the eraser wiping away all the hours of stress and scribbled confusion

When the last marker stain was finally wiped clean, you stepped back to admire the blank space like it was a newly renovated canvas.

“Look at that,” you said, arms crossed, satisfied. “A fresh start.”

Spencer hummed in agreement beside you. “Symbolic.”

You glanced at him. “For what?”

He tilted his head, thoughtful. “Tomorrow. The next chapter. Your well-deserved nap.”

You let out a sleepy laugh. “God, yes. That.”

He smiled, then reached out and gently tapped your forehead with his index finger. “Go lay down, before you try to start another lecture.”

You caught his hand before he could pull it away and gave it a small squeeze. “Only if you’re coming with me.”

Spencer’s smile widened, eyes soft as he laced your fingers together. “Lead the way, professor.”

[inhuman-obey-me]

Congrats on 100k likes!! Is there any more room or space left? If so, Belphegor and 7 pls!

Thank you!! And you're the lucky last one we're doing. <3

Belphegor + 7 | "Better Days" - Currents

cw: depression talk

It's said that when humans have a sleep paralysis demon haunting them, they often feel an unyielding weight upon their bodies, rendering them unable to move. It's a tried and true trick that Belphegor knows quite well.

"Is this what it feels like?" he muses, sprawled out on his bed as he stares at the ceiling, eyes tracing a pattern of painted stars. He's been doing this for the past ten hours, unable to get himself up to do much of anything else. The weight pressing down on him was suffocating, so why did he also find it so oddly comforting? Had he just gotten used to the heaviness? Used to the hole that had dug itself deep into his chest?

"Belphie, you haven't eaten anything all day." Beelzebub's voice draws him out of his thoughts. Lazily turning his head to meet his twin's gaze, he lets out a long sigh.

"Not hungry."

Beelzebub frowns, crumbs littering his face as he chews on whatever he just stuffed into his mouth. It's clear he wants to say something, but he instead plops down on the floor beside Belphegor's bed, leaning back and pulling out another snack to munch on. The seventh-born almost wants to tell him to leave, but he knows it'll get him nowhere — Beelzebub always knew when something was wrong.

"…Do you ever miss it?"

"Mish wha?" His brother responds, his mouth full.

"The Celestial Realm." Belphegor's fingers curl into fists, his brows furrowed as he turns to look at the wall. "Being an angel."

He can hear Beel pause his chewing before resuming at a quicker pace. After a few moments, Belphegor feels the bed tilt and move, Beelzebub now having lifted himself to sit on its edge.

"I mean, yeah. Sometimes." Beelzebub shifts. "It was a big part of our lives, so it's only natural, right? But I'm happy to be a demon now too, and to be here with our family, which is what's really important."

"Except for Lilith."

"…Yeah. Except for Lilith." His twin deflates. "…What's on your mind, Belphie?"

"Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one who just gets stuck." The words are bitter on his tongue, frustration rising in his voice. "I'm glad we finally found out the truth about what happened to her, but it doesn't erase the fact that she's gone. Everyone else just…moved on! And I'm just here."

That suffocating yet comforting weight, keeping him in place.

"…Are you here? It sounds more like you're there." With a forceful tap on Belphegor's shoulder, Beelzebub makes him turn towards him. "I…get it. You know I do. I still feel guilty — and yes, I know," he stops Belphie from interrupting, "…it's not my fault, it couldn't be helped. But I still feel that way. So sometimes I feel like I'm more there, you know." He scratches the back of his neck, trying to find the right words. "Mammon and Asmo talk a lot about 'living in the moment', and I think I get it. We can't change the past, but we can hold onto what we have right now, like each other."

"…Really? You got your great advice from those two?" Belphegor groans, but it's hard to hide the hint of a smile on his lips. "I think they're probably talking more about partying and doing something stupid."

"Probably, but it doesn't change what I said." Beelzebub stands up, holding out a hand to his brother with a determined look. "So, how about we try living in the moment right now? Maybe we can even go do something stupid."

A low chuckle, and it's like the weight lessens. A knowing sigh, and it lessens again. Belphegor reaches out to take the other's hand, letting himself get dragged off the bed.

"Okay. But don't blame me if Lucifer gets mad."

[animemakesmeanxiouss]

TW: Cursing, negging, misogyny, sexually suggestive, maybe explicit?

"Are you really going to eat all that?" He asked, his face not really bothering to hide his disdain towards my meal.

I popped another french fry into my mouth and gave an exaggerated mmm before replying.

"Yeah, what did you think I mean when I said 'we should get some burgers and shakes'?"

"I just thought you were going to get, like, a salad."

This may be the worst date I've ever been on, but no way I'm going to let some guy ruin this delicious food.

"It's whatever, I guess," he continued, "So do you like heroes?"

Oh okay so he's making an effort to get to know me. Maybe he's not so bad.

"I love heroes! I think my favorites are probably Eraser," I said thoughtfully, "and Dynamight."

He hummed in response. Not a thoughtful hum, or an inquisitive one. One of those condescending hums. I sighed after finishing off my burger and washing it down with some vanilla milkshake.

"What now?"

"No, nothing."

I gave him a hard stare.

"I just think it's interesting that your favorite heroes are men. Aren't you like, a feminist?" He questioned.

I was stunned.

"Do you...do you think I'm going to fuck Dynamight?"

He shrugged and mumbled something I didn't quite catch, but quite frankly I was over it. I grabbed my food tray to toss the empty cartons and he dumped his onto it as well, without a single word of please, thank you, or asking to do the favor of throwing his trash out.

Once that was done, I excused myself to the restroom to freshen up and upon my return, saw there were two receipts at the table. One paid for, one not, so I went over to the register to pay for my meal. The girl ringing me up asked me if all was okay in the way only us girls could really communicate, and I gave a shrug.

"It's rough out here"

She nodded in agreement and wished me luck.

I turned around and he was waiting by the door, so I went to bid him farewell. Before I could reach him, he walked out the door and just as I was about to walk through, it nearly slammed in my face, making me jump.

Frustrated, I pushed through, ignoring him, and started walking to my car. It looked like there was a small crowd gathering half a block down from where I'd parked, so at least I wouldn't be completely alone in this rough part of town.

Soon enough, I heard footsteps behind me and it was him. Walking me to it was the least he could do after this poor excuse for a date, so at least there's that.

"We going to your place, or mine?"

Again, I was stunned. The noise behind me got louder but I was too focused on what this idiot was implying.

"Uhh, hello?," he started snapping his fingers in my face, "are we going to your place, or mine?" He asked again, slowly but loudly.

"Boy, what the hell are you talking about?" He looked behind me and then back at me about to say something, but I wasn't going to let this loser waste anymore of my time, "Do you really think after pulling that 'negging' bullshit on me, I'd still sleep with you? Why would anyone in their right mi-"

OOF! Something rammed into me and I heard an incredibly loud crashing sound and lost all thought for a moment.

I suddenly realized I was being carried in someone's arms, before being carefully set down by the idiot I was desperatly trying to get away from.

"Are you fucking stupid or something? Did you not hear everyone telling you to get your girlfriend out of the way? Or did you not see the giant fucking boulder about to crush her?"

None other than Dynamight was bitching at my date for leaving me in harm's way, right after he himself saved me.

There's no way this is really happening.

The moron stood there for a moment looking like he was going to cry, then tried to act cool.

"Oh, look, it's the dickhead hero from the news trying to be positive for a change."

Dynamight looked at him incredulously, and for a second, I thought his hands started to glow before he shook them off.

"Yeah, and I bet your bitch is my biggest fan."

Dumbass stood there looking like, well, a dumbass. What else could he say though?

"You're right!" I burst out laughing, "I told him your one of my favorite heroes just a minute ago"

This made Dynamight smile at me, while I pointed at the guy and corrected, "I'm not his bitch though. That was the worst date ever"

The hero raised an eyebrow before looking me up and down, before glancing over to the guy and tutting.

"You really fumbled her? Bigger idiot than I could've thought"

My cheeks turned red, but this gave me the encouragement I needed.

"Aw Dynamight, you're making me blush. Actually, I was wondering what time you're done patrolling so we could...go back to my place?" I asked, wiggling my eyebrows at him.

His smile was back, and he gave a quick glance over at the clocktower not too far from us before saying he was actually off now, just needed to finish helping arrest the criminals that were causing the commotion when he saved me.

"Whatever man! She's a fatass anyway!" The loser shouted at us.

The blonde reached his hand out to me. Confused, I took it, and he guided me into doing a couple of spins while his eyes ran up and down my body again before stopping, bringing my hand to his lips and kissing it.

"That ass is fantastic."

And that, friends, is how I ended up fucking Pro Hero Dynamight.

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Do not copy, repost, translate, plagiarize, and process in any way, shape, or form, including through AI.

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A/N: Got this idea from watching this video by fan0fthearts (yt/ig/tt). Many more to come because their art and concepts are amazing.

Also, I know this is terribly written but I needed to get it out of my head. Hopefully will rewrite/fix in the future

[dervampireprince]

The Historical OCs Have Designs!

I've been saying I'd get this done for a while.

I have three ASMR audio series where I initially had no plans for the characters I portray in them to be actual proper original characters. No name, no design, no attachment. And the first one I did, the 'visiting king', was initially meant to be just a one-off audio. I had no idea these series would get so popular, and the first 'visiting king' audio is still my most viewed video on Youtube currently sitting at over 100k views. And soon what was a one-off audio became a whole series, and then I made others similar to it.

These three audio series ('Visiting King, 'Villain x Hero' and 'Guilty Priest') never had character designs or names. But as people started liking them and as I kept getting more requests for them I wanted to try and design them and turn them into proper OCs. But I was scared. People loved the audios that just had photographs of my outfits in them, what if my designs were a disappointment? What if they didn't live up to people's imagined versions of them?

Back in April-May 2024 I designed the Guilty Priest and named him Father Hawthorn. I added him to the OC stickers and keychains I have for sale on my Etsy shop.

And then I just never got around to designing the other two. And it felt more nerve-wracking to try and design them, especially the Visiting King as he's my most popular series of audios in terms of Youtube views (yes even more than Love Bites).

But yesterday I thought okay, enough, I have to design them. People have been asking for over a year and I keep saying I will, I have to try.

I had a much clearer vision for the Visiting King, so I challenged myself to design the Villain first. I really struggled. I erased so many sketches. And I only kept a few of the scraped designs on the final concept art sheet. Finally I got so frustrated I stopped drawing him in the basic standing pose I use for all my ref sheets and thought I'd try and draw a more fun pose and maybe that would help. And somehow it did. And then drawing the King was much easier.

(Thank you to mellon_soup for their free-to-use pose references, you can check them out on Patreon where they have free poses (with extra behind their paid memberships) that you can use to reference or use as a base).

I shared the work-in-progresses of drawing these guys with my 18+ Patreon-only Discord members to get feedback as I went along and they were so sweet. Me and my Discord members also discussed other ideas I had about the characters, including the fact that I... have started shipping them very badly. To the point I think it's canon now (not canon in their 'x listener' audios but in their regular stories). And thank you to my Discord members for letting me write just so many drabbles about them last night and how I think they would meet and get together.

And thank you to my Discord members for joining in on writing about them and in someone's case, instantly drawing fanart of their designs. They all already had pages on my fanart museum, but now the King and Villains pages are updated and there is a page for fanart of both of them together.

So below are their reference sheets. In order of when I first came up with the characters (which ironically is the opposite order of when I designed them). Lucien (the King) and Lysander's (the Villain) sheets are entirely new, whereas Hawthorn had one before but I've finally drawn a full body of him that isn't a chibi so the sheet has been updated. These are also on my fanworks guide now.

Thank you guys so much for the support on all my audios, and especially my original character ones. It always means so much when people listen to them, even if you came only for a fandom character and then gave my original boys a shot. It's always been a dream of mine to have original characters that other's like and care about and I can share with other people, and I'm so happy to have found that space with you guys.

The next time each of these characters have new audios I hope to have thumbnail art drawn that will replace the photographs of myself. I hope that change doesn't upset or disappoint anyone.

Anyway this got long. The men are below. I hope they're all kissable.

(PS. If there is an interest in my posting my drabbles about Lucien/Lysander please let me know, I've already written sfw and n#sfw things about them and I'd love to draw them as soon as I get less scared of drawing romantic and n#sfw art. If I end up writing a lot of drabbles or anything longer I'd put it on my dervampireprince AO3 too. I have a n#sfw Leon/Dracula Castlevania fic (my first full fic I've written in 2+ years) I posted no there last week, and Alucard/Olrox NSFW drabbles and art I've been posting all week on here.)

[krillonthegrill]

how i think they should've handled PriceField breaking up (and how it should've been written if they didn't)

first off, i don't think Chloe should've ever physically been in the game. i think Max getting some time to breathe without Chloe was good for her character - Max's personality got to shine in this game, and i love her more than i ever have.

besides, Chloe being in the game wouldn't add very much, because the driving plot is all about Safi and her relationships. she would get in the way more than anything else. Chloe got two games that were basically all about her, i think it's okay for her to sit this one out

anyways, what D9 should've done

make their break-up more about their individual traumas getting in the way of their relationship

here's the thing: Max and Chloe were only together for a week. not even, five days. they had FIVE DAYS to rekindle their lost friendship after not being in contact for FIVE YEARS. and now they run away together after causing the deaths of dozens, one of which including Joyce, whom both of them care an immense amount about

i can buy Chloe maybe resenting Max a little. i think the way it was written was weird - "when Chloe found out about Joyce", however i think i can make sense of that.

maybe she thought (or hoped) that Two Whales would still be standing, but it isn't - that's when she would "find out" that Joyce was dead.

remember that resentment doesn't need to be logical. Chloe DID give Max a choice and stood by her, but once the dust is settled and the consequences are laid out in front of her? yeah, of COURSE she can't look at Max the same way

take out all the stuff with Chloe not trusting that Max wasn't using her powers. i think that's dumb and doesn't make sense for her to say unless they actually SET UP Max still using her powers - which they only do in platonic-bae. but they didn't, so she was just being an asshole, which i don't like

no way either of them are in therapy for any of this, because a) they have no consistent source of income, and therapy is expensive. and b) how would they fully talk about what happened without revealing Max's powers?

Max has full-on PTSD from the stuff with Jefferson, and the deaths of dozens on her head, as well as general trauma from trying to protect Chloe. Max says in DE that she still relives all of this. every single day, she's thinking about this. it's been 10 years at this point, and she's just been running from it.

she has good and bad days, but the bad days are the lowest of lows. and it's difficult.

Chloe does not have the tools to help. she can sit and be a grounding presence for Max all she wants during her episodes, but the core of the problem - which is Max's guilt and self-hate over what happened - won't go away on their own. she feels helpless, and that turns into frustration that gets taken out on the only person she's around - Max. and none of it is on purpose, but she just can't understand it, and it doesn't help that Max doesn't either

resentment builds, feelings are hurt, apologies are said, but they love each other, right? it'll work. it HAS to work, or what the fuck was it all for?

their break-up COULD be determinant, but this is how it would go down - i'm not sure how keen i am on keeping it tied to Chloe NOT wanting to move in with Max, but let's assume it does

that small fight that turns into something bigger when Max gets triggered by the fact that Chloe doesn't necessarily want to be a homemaker with her (it's more complicated than that, but that's what she fixates on). the fight lasts for hours, and lots of things are said out of frustration and anger that cannot be taken back, and no apologies said after can erase it

i think the break-up would be mutual - it's not that they're bad for each other, it's that a healthy relationship cannot thrive in the situation they have created for themselves. they part ways - Max ends up at Caledon, Chloe continues driving around the country.

instead of a note from Chloe, Max writes about the break-up in her journal that the player can read, and it's very clear that Max is an unreliable narrator because, at the time of writing, she's still reeling from it all.

it plays out much of the same as the bae-route in its current state - Max finally gets a text from Chloe at the end when the storm starts forming because Chloe still cares, and Chloe's return is set up and the player is either excited or nervous for it (or both)

now, if the player wanted them to stay together? their break-up is more of a break - they just go long-distance

Max is at Caledon, Chloe is somewhere. her absence is supplemented by texts that get more and more worried as Max begins pulling away due to Power Shenanigans™ (and maybe she doesn't want to get Chloe involved in that again - i can totally believe that). again, Chloe's return is set up at the end of the game

also, Max is locked out of Vinh and Amanda's romances in this version.

so yeah, what do we think? i'm not even the biggest pricefield shipper but even i know they fucked it up with how they wrote Chloe out

[obsessedasusual]

Lonely No More - Nine

Bishop Losa x OC Series

Summary: There was never a dull moment, being the only Reyes sister. But between overbearing brothers, being the family peacekeeper, and countless disaster dates, Amalia finds herself wishing she had someone to unwind with after a hectic day. Funnily enough, Bishop Losa wishes for the same thing.

Warnings: swearing, feels, everything MC related really

Note: it's okay I hate me as well :)))

The knock at the door came as Amalia was mid-sip of her second glass of red wine.

After a day of having a door slammed in her face by her younger brother and awkward prolonged eye contact from the man she couldn’t seem to get out of her head, a glass or two of red was more than welcomed.

She sighed quietly and hoped whoever it was would soon leave.

It wasn’t late, Amalia had only just finished cleaning up after dinner and had begun to settle on the sofa with reruns of ‘Say Yes to the Dress’, keen to erase the events from the past few days.

When the second knock came she threw her head back in frustration before pulling herself to stand and answer the door.

Seeing Bishop standing on her front step should have been expected, he was really the only person she knew in this town that bothered to knock, but it still caught her off guard.

He stared at her for a beat before breaking the silence, “Hey.”

He was still dressed in his kutte, having only just left the club. When Amalia peered over his shoulder to the driveway she noted the lack of motorbike, he must have walked from his place which would explain the silent arrival.

She looked back to him, replying with a soft, “Hi.”

Bishop looked at his feet and cleared his throat before speaking again, “Can I come in?”

“Uh… yeah sure.” She stepped back and opened the door further for him, allowing him into her home.

This wasn’t how she saw her night going. She had just finished compartmentalising everything going on in her life right now and had come to the conclusion that she and Bishop were just an equally lonely pair, whos paths crossed unexpectedly for a short time and they were going to revert back to how their relationship was a couple of months prior - essentially nonexistent. And she was totally okay with that. Absolutely. Cool as a cucumber. 

Lie.

She wasn’t sure when she’d grown so fond of the older man, and it hurt to think that he didn’t feel the same.

Amalia followed to where Bishop stood awkwardly near the dining table, eyes anywhere but her.

“Could I uh, do you want a drink?” She offered helplessly. He shook his head, eyes on the carpet beneath him.

“No, I uh… I came to apologise,” he looked at her then, seeing how his words caught the Reyes sister off guard, “Been busy with the club and ah, time got away from me.”

Amalia nodded silently, not knowing what to say. He was the one turning up on her doorstep, he could do the talking. Admittedly it was a childish response.

Bishop continued at the silence, “I’m sorry for not reaching out sooner.”

“It’s okay.” Amalia mumbled. It’s not like she reached out either.

The President shook his head at her response, “Nah, it’s not, querida. I know the other night when I left… I should’ve reached out.”

It was clear that this conversation was making him uncomfortable, Amalia felt the exact same. This was uncharted territory for them. Hell - just over a month ago they were merely friendly acquaintances. It was crazy, how their friendship grew so fast. And it was about to derail even faster by the sound of this conversation.

She sighed and looked around the room, “Bishop look. It’s okay, I get it.” He looked at her quizzingly as she continued, “It was just a… a thing that happened. While we were messing around. I understand that’s all it was.”

Bishop studied her for a moment, remaining silent as he waited for her to continue speaking.

The red wine had started to infiltrate her system by now, and Amalia could feel herself loosening up and letting words fall more freely.

“I mean, look at us!” she gestured between them with a weak smile, “You’re President of an outlaw MC and I’m the communications lead for a building company. We don’t exactly have a lot in common.” 

Everything Amalia was saying was four days worth of pent up emotion. Did she mean all of it? No. But history had taught her that it was easier to be the rejector than the rejectee, “And then, there’s the whole thing with my brothers. Could you imagine if they found out? What a mess that would be.”

If Bishop disagreed he did a good job at hiding it, choosing to remain silent as Amalia rambled away.

She finally reigned it in, stopping herself from digging a deeper hole, “No hard feelings, Bish. Promise.”

After a moment of silence he repeated, “No hard feelings, querida,” eyes locked on hers, “I’ll uh - I’ll leave you to your night.”

Amalia nodded, “Okay.”

He made his way back to the front door and stared at her for a moment longer, “Okay.” He repeated, giving her a small smile and leaving her house.

Well that wasn’t awkward at all.

—

Bishop sulked the second her front door closed behind him.

We don’t exactly have a lot in common.

Did that really matter? Was having a lot in common with a person the make or break of a relationship?

He turned back toward her house when he reached the letterbox, catching her shadow moving across the living room. 

On each of the past few days Bishop had found himself staring intently at his phone, either waiting for it to alert him of a new message or in the hope he’d finally rip the Band-Aid off and call the subject of his infatuation.

He should’ve reached out. He regretted that now more than ever.

But this was good, he supposed. It’s better he know how she feels before he attempted to pursue anything further with her.

Sighing, he turned and started the short walk home.

[miela]

Shattered Memories • Chapter III: A Sense of Reunion II • {Peter Parker x Stark!Reader}

Chapter Genre: Angst (???) Chapter Warnings: Mentions of Substance Abuse Masterlist

↪ divider by firefly-graphics

VIDEO LOG #20 / 10 JUNE 2026

Hey (Y/N),

 It’s me, Peter.

It’s been almost two years since you have forgotten about me. And to be honest, these two years have been absolutely hell without you. I got a redo on life as most people wish for but be careful what you wish for I guess. I have a new life and it’s okay. I have friends from school but they’ll never compare to you, Celina, Ned, and MJ. I have two jobs and they pay okay. It helps with rent. I’m still out there being Spiderman, I haven’t heard anything about you though which I guess is understandable. I hope you’re doing okay.

I miss you….I miss you so much. In times like these, I know I could always turn to you, lay my head on your shoulder, and cry…you would rub my back, kiss the top of my head, and tell me that everything is going to be okay...because we had each other. I feel like I took those moments for granted even though I know I didn’t. I just really miss you. 

I hope one day…I could be in your arms again. I love you so much.

[END RECORDING]

I know who you are. 

It rang and echoed in Peter's head after you said it. His heart didn’t know what it wanted to do; stop and explode or race and explode. He looked at you with an expression he could only imagine was a mix of shock and anticipation. How long did you know? Is that why you came to find him? Because you remembered him? There were so many things he wanted to say, ask and do.

But before he could even react, your words knocked his cathedral of hope down to the ground just as quickly as it was built up.

"But I don't remember you."

And there it was. The catch. His heart dropped.

Of course, it wouldn’t have been that easy for him. Even though five years went by and that was more than plenty of time for you to figure it out with what little information you had, Strange’s spell was thorough and very effective. Peter wasn’t sure if he wanted to scream or cry or to crawl in a dark hole and whither away. He didn’t even know how to respond. How was he supposed to explain everything to you? How was he supposed to explain his reasoning for not following through with his promise five years ago?

He just looked at you dumbfounded.

You pressed your lips together and nodded slowly at his response of silence. “When going through the Avenger files, I saw your file. Funny how I recognized everyone else but I didn’t recognize you. Even funnier that we were partners in justice and crime fighting and I didn’t even remember your face. So I did a month-long deep dive.”

Peter never took his eyes off of you and you never took your eyes off of him. He could tell you were getting serious although your expression was still pretty relaxed. On the other hand, he could feel his jaw clench from his nerves making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

“I asked around. I asked Sam, Bucky, Dr. Cho, Ned, MJ, Celina…anyone who has a connection to you and none of them know who you are. Well, MJ and Ned said you come into the coffee shop a lot, but they don’t know you. See, memories can be erased from people, but not from algorithms. We went to the same high school, both were in the academic decathlon with MJ, and we had almost all the same classes together. We were both Avengers, we were a duo team because we have the same powers, I remember every single mission, Hell, I remember fighting you,” you continued with emotion in your voice that Peter could only guess was frustration. “But I don’t remember…you.”

Peter decided he wanted to scream. He wanted to scream and then tell you everything, but he had his reasons for not telling you.

“For five years I’ve been dreaming of this guy. I call him the Faceless Boy. I have dreamt of him every single night since that day five years ago. The dreams are more than dreams, more than that dream-walking shit Celina talks about. These dreams are memories with someone who is so foreign to me.” You walked over by him slowly and stopped when you were about three feet away and you looked up into his eyes. “When I snuck through your window today, I expected a different response from you after webbing me to the wall.”

Peter gulped slightly.

“You talked to me like you knew who I was. A long-time friend that you haven’t seen in a while and one you weren’t expecting to see for an even longer while. And then when we shook hands…?” You chewed on your lip nervously, almost like you were afraid to say the next bit. “For five years, I’ve had this hole in my chest, as if something was carved out of my life when it wasn’t supposed to be. I’ve tried to fill it with anything and everything and I failed every single time. So tell me why when we shook hands I never felt it so whole before. A simple handshake from a boy from Queens filled my emptiness like he was the missing puzzle piece.”

Peter’s heart raced as you spoke and looked at him with a desperation for answers, but he couldn’t speak. He didn’t know how to respond as you searched his dark eyes for answers. He didn’t want to lie to you but…he also didn’t want to tell you the truth. The truth is what is keeping you safe and what is keeping you sane. 

“I know you feel it right now,” you said. “The pull.”

The pheromonal connection.

Peter could feel it, He didn’t stop feeling it since he sensed you in his apartment, especially after the handshake. His senses were in a frenzy, he could only imagine how yours were, especially when you couldn’t even remember who he was to you. He pressed his lips together. 

“So tell me, Peter Parker,” you started again. “What happened?”

Peter looked deeply into your eyes and slowly brought his hand up to your cheek and gently caressed it before laying his hand on it. You leaned your face into his touch and closed your eyes. His senses instantly focused on you. Your breath hitched as you opened your eyes again to look up at his dark ones.

He wanted to tell you everything so badly. He wanted to tell you how he knew you like the back of his hand. He wanted to tell you that he knew your favorite things and that you couldn’t cook to save your life, and that you loved to dance and you did ballet since you were a child. He wanted to tell you how in high school you would viscerally defend him every time Flash Thompson opened his mouth and called Peter “Penis Parker” and how when you found out Flash’s real name you started using it just to piss him off and shut him up. He wanted to tell you about how MJ didn’t like him at first because she was afraid that the same situation that happened with him and Liz would happen to you. He wanted to tell you how you and Ned would constantly bicker over who was the coolest character in Star Wars and that everyone thought your favorite anime was Chainsaw Man but he knew it was actually Sailor Moon (and that you constantly argued that Usagi would floor Goku anytime any day and any era). He wanted to tell you everything about yourself and your memories until his jaw hurt from talking too much.

But everything in him told him not to.

“(Y/N)...” he began. “I-”

Before he could finish his sentence your eyes blinked rapidly and your brows furrowed before you winced and hissed. You held your head as you let out a noise of pain and Peter instantly pulled back. 

“(Y/N)? (Y/N)! Are you okay? What’s happening?!” Peter panicked.

After a moment you looked up at him catching your breath softly. “Yeah….yeah. I’m fine. Like I said before. Stark Stress.”

Peter called total bullshit on that. 

“What were we talking about?” You asked softly to no one in particular.

Peter looked at you wide eyes filled with confusion and concern. 

“Uh…” he searched his scatterbrain for something to say. “The…uh…Avenger Files? You were going to tell me why you were going through the Avenger files, yeah…mhm…”

You looked at him with a knowing expression. “Parker, I remember everything I said. It was a rhetorical question.”

“Oh…!” Peter squeaked. 

You rubbed your temples and smiled up at him. “You won’t tell me anything. That’s fine I won't force you. Whatever you did, you did it for good reason.” You leaned back on the table. “I’ll figure it out anyway. Just promise you’ll be honest with me when I ask about something.”

Peter nodded. “Y-yeah! Yeah, sure, yeah I’ll be …uh….I’ll be honest.”

“Great!” you clapped your hands together. “Now down to business. I didn’t just drag you here to interrogate you.” You turned to the table to avoid his gaze.

You were deflecting the situation. Peter knows because you tend to do that when you have felt like you came off too strong in a situation and your way of reacting was to pretend like it was nothing big in hopes that the other person would follow suit. At this moment, Peter was glad you did, because he would’ve done it if you didn’t. Especially when those Stark Stress Migraines seemed more like Parker Stress ones. Both times you guys made contact you had a strong reaction. It scared him and he wanted to know why. He wished he could have asked Strange about this, but Strange didn’t remember him and probably wouldn’t even remember the spell. 

He guessed that was his big sign to keep his distance from you. 

Later, he was taken back home in time for him to go out patrolling once more. He swung across the veins of New York City as he thought about the events that happened.

Today was a really strange day.

After your whole interrogation, you told him about your plans for the NAI and the scholarship that Tony had left for him. 

 “My dad had an actual internship and scholarship set aside for you but obviously it was meant for MIT. I changed it up a bit for your sake. So your last five years will be compensated and paid off tuition-wise and the rest of your time in school will be paid in full. You will also have an internship opportunity whenever you’re ready for it. It will be a summer internship so you can have full focus on it without any distractions, or you could do it during winter break. Whatever works for you.” You pointed at the holographic screens respectively. 

Peter looked at the holograms in shock. Tony was planning on doing all of this for him. He shouldn’t be surprised but he was…and was touched by it. And you modifying it to fit his needs made it all the more… meaningful. He did remember Tony offering him a grant when he first came to visit him but he thought he wasn’t serious about it and was using it for code to add to the stark internship.  

He almost didn’t take it, but you insisted. 

 “Parker, this was something my dad set in place years ago. Consider it a token of gratitude. He would want this for you.” you explained. “But I won't force it on you if you really don’t want it.”

Peter sighed when he stopped on a building to think. He hated keeping the truth from you, and he hated that you were suffering all this time because of your migraines. He remembered your big reaction to both times that he touched you. 

It was hurting you. 

He wondered if it would be the same for Ned, Celina, and MJ. Would they have a splitting headache if he got close to any of them too? The whole point of this stupid spell was to protect the ones he cared about, not cause them pain. 

He really, really hated magic.

He sighed and sat down at the edge of the building. He thought about what you went through in the past years without him. He had hoped that you would have been living your best life without worry, but instead, you were dreaming about him without knowing who he was, and he had to sit there and not tell you that it was him that you were dreaming about. 

It was best to just stay away from you all. Like it was intended five years ago.

He needed a distraction. He remembered one of his friends from school mentioning a party at his Fraternity House this weekend that Peter initially said no to going to. But after today he could use it. He took out his phone and called him.

“Parker,” Harry Osborn, chimed. “What’s up, my guy?”

“Hey Harry,” Peter greeted. “I changed my mind, I do wanna go to that party tomorrow.”

To say you were a mess was an understatement. 

You didn’t seem it though. You were working with Nika on the list of foundations and non-profit organizations that would be attending the charity gala that you were hosting in a month. You’re first act of Philanthropy would be donating at least one billion dollars each year to different organizations and you wanted it to be a well-rounded event but you were distracted by the recent ones that happened.

Nika could tell.

“(Y/N),” she said, folding her hands in her lap. “Are you okay? Did that Avenger boy do something to you?”

“Huh? What? No,” You replied a little defensively. “He’s harmless.”

“Then why do you seem so upset?” She asked with concern in her tone. “You were fine earlier.”

You sighed and rubbed your temples with your fingers gently as you closed your eyes. “Migraine,” you responded, only giving part of the problem. 

She sighed knowing that you weren’t telling her everything. “I’m going to talk to you as a friend.”

You looked at the redhead expectantly.

“You haven’t had much of a life since…well…since I first met you four years ago.”

You met Nika Eyrewolfe, back in the recovery center. She was in for substance abuse herself. Since then you guys have been great friends and been a good support for each other. When you found out that she had no place to call home or anything to her name, you got her a job at Stark Industries before she was promoted to your assistant. She’s done nothing but a great job at it. She has been with you most days since you became CEO. So to say the girl knew your life and schedule like her life depended on it was an understatement.

“You’ve worked yourself so much that your headaches are getting worse and worse,” she continued. “The only person you hang out with is Morgan, who’s ten years old. You haven’t made time for Celina, Ned, and MJ in forever. But you had time to get Avenger Boy.”

“He has a name,” You retorted. “Peter. Peter Parker.”

“That’s nice,” Nika replied sarcastically. “And who is Peter Parker to you exactly?”

That’s the problem. I don’t know, you thought.

All you know is that he was the cutest guy you have ever seen in your entire life. His brown curls were soft and silky on his head. His eyes looked tired but they were soft and kind. He had boyish features that only added to his softness. And his smile. God, that smile. It lit up his whole face. His black tee shirt hugged his muscles nicely, and his dark denim jeans hugged his thighs and legs in just the right way. You had to catch yourself from staring at him too long before it got really weird.

You stayed silent and leaned your head on the back of your chair.

“Exactly,” Nika stated. “Nothing. So, you should make time for your friends. I’ll clear your calendar this weekend.”

The thing was that Peter wasn’t “nothing” to you, he was definitely a big something. You were at least eighty percent sure he was the faceless boy from your dreams. And when he touched you…? You couldn’t ignore that no matter how much you tried. The way his hand was so heartbreakingly gentle on your skin as all your worries faded away for a small moment before the splitting headache came again. It’s not like you could tell Nika any of this.

But she was right about one thing. It had been a while since you hung out with your friends. You kept in touch with them in the group chat, but it wasn’t the same as seeing them. 

“Okay,” you gave her a small smile. “Thank you, Nika. What would I be without you?”

“I dunno, probably insane.”

You snorted in response.

Maybe it would be good for you to step away from everything for a little bit. Especially with how crazy your day was. You especially wanted to pretend this day never happened, crawl into the void, and scream until your voice was gone. You deserved to relax for a moment and maybe next time you make the impulsive decision to climb into the window of someone you think you know but you don’t…

You won’t.

~

tags: @riordanness @chrisevans-realwife @peterdarlingg

[cyten0]

A Symphony In Crimson

Act 1: A Movement in Black

Chapter ??

♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯♯

You return from your scouting trip. Nothing seems to have followed you, and area seems clear. Kind of a shame, you were kinda hoping for a fight! Got a lot of frustration to get out. Oh well, Should be fine, you'll probs find something later! Now, you need to check up on Mi (♫), So (𝄢), La (♪), and Ti (𝄡)

You see La (♪) looking out from the crows nest, to see if you all were followed. Her one keen eye looks out over the ocean, looking over at your home across the way as it flickers in and out of view. The wishcraft doesn’t hold much sway over all of you, but here even you can see it’s blinding messed up. She turns as she sees you approach.

♪ “Hey Re. Anything of note?”

♯ “Not really. There is a town nearby though! Signage said Bambouche? Could maybe gather some info or supplies!”

So (𝄢) peeks out of the cargo hold, clearly in their irritable persona. She’s clearly cranky from working so hard to find anything, her face keeps flickering and her horns are out. You all are little tense right now, given you’ll be entering civilization for the first time in a WHILE.

𝄢 “I TOLD you both to stop speaking Astravian! Get in the habit of speaking Vaugardian, or YOU are cleaning up the mess of giving everyone there Headaches!”

Right. Feels bad having to do that, but can’t be helped! You won’t be able to talk to anyone here about your home, both for memory reasons and ‘not causing a panic knowing the country next door is a heap of ruins and flesh-eating infectious monsters’ reasons....

ARGH! You wish you could just punch this whole mess away! You wish you could at least punch HIM in the face! ...Whatever, you do need to get in the habit anyways.

♪ “… Yeah, alright. Gonna take some getting used to.”

♯ “Yeah, Sorry So! Oh, By the way, how are things looking with you?”

So’s face fizzles into their more calm persona. Hopefully they have something.

𝄢 “Tracking that console you gave them is not looking to be optimal. I haven't detected any usage. I however did set it up so that the moment they do, your phone will get an alert so you can call them immediately.”

That's good. You'll keep a close eye on it.

Ti (𝄡) gets up from his meditation. He puts his helmet back on, sketches a sigil onto a piece of paper, and then quietly hands it to So.

𝄡 “Counter sigil made.”

Quiet as always. But you’re glad you have that now! Only Ti would be able to come up with a counter-craft sigil for all this.

It won’t undo effects of memory-erasing stuff, but at least it’ll keep more from happening if you need someone in the loop. Or at least for them… Get it together, it’ll be fine!

𝄢 “Good work. I’ll make sure to include it in the automated alert to them. How about you Mi?”

Mi (♫) continues strumming their guitar. Listening in. Their antenna is moving, seeing if they can’t feel them, just in case. You hope they do, it’d be a solid lead, even if it probably means things have hit the fan. You don’t have much to go off of, not even sure their in Vaugarde at this point.

♫ “… I don’t feel their music. I uh. Guess that’s good? I hope…”

𝄡 “It will be fine. I’m certain.”

♯ “Yeah! I’m sure it’s fine! Just gotta figure out where they are!”

You say that. But… All of you are nervous… It’s been what. 7 years since Astravia fell? You don’t know what’s happened to them in that time… You hope their okay… No! Get it together, they’re strong! They can handle it! You’re SURE their fine!

… You open up your phone. That picture you took with them is still right there, looking at you. It’s you and them. Their little horn, their eyes… You wonder if they picked a different face since then? Guess you’ll find out!…

Stay Strong! We’re always with you!

...You’re a little late. But. You’re all here now.

Hold on just a little longer, Fa.

𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞𝄞

… You look over the laboratory. It’s awfully quiet without them. Only the experiments, silent in their cages, tame from your designs…

They weren’t blinding content with your plans, despite them being PERFECT... And now your friends are gone...

… It’s fine. If they won’t play stagehands, they’ll play actors! You know them well enough. You can get them to play the parts you want. And you have plenty of other players to nudge them on course!

You look at the Arcanums laid out before you. Now that you’ve tested you can nudge wishes how you need, Bought yourself plenty of prep time, you’ll focus on setting the conditions right. If you can do this, it’ll all be fixed!!

Sure, a bunch of people will die, but it’s fine! They’ll all come back, better then ever! And then, No one will ever get hurt again! The world will be your perfect play, and they’ll all be happy!

One of the creatures in the cages starts to mumble. Ah, their human part is still lucid? You thought that pests infection would have drowned them out…

“hhelp….. meeeee….It…... hurts…..”

Oh well, it IS a kings duty to comfort the masses! You walk up to the cage, and hold their head.

𝄞 “Don’t worry, it will all be over soon! And then you’ll never have to hurt again!”

You let them go, as the infection swallows their mind again....

To be fair, you did infect this one yourself, now that you think about it! The few survivors left would not be enough for your purposes, but the infected… Their FAR more efficient for what you need!

But since they did ask for reprieve, and you need more energy, you might as well grant their desire!

You make the adjustments to your setup, and then turn towards your subject. You look them in the eye, channeling your divine right as king. And with a snap of your fingers they are ripped apart into blood and holy light. The energy of their sacrifice flows away from it’s normal purpose into your design.

There! Your wishes will be merged onto someone else’s, and all that energy will help fuel it!

You're sure the Arcana won’t mind! It is going to benefit them in the end! Your just... taking a few extra steps. To make sure it goes to completion this time! It’s fine!

...Once all of them are on the stage, and she is made whole, the final act of this worthless world will end. And the beginning of your perfect play can begin!

...But first, you must make sure you have enough fuel.... You look out your window, upon your neighboring country. Oh dear Vaugarde. Precious Vaugarde…

Well. You suppose Astravia WAS a conquering nation, back in the day! Might as well play the part, tehe! Oh how lovely that will be! A holy war for the fate of the world! The Stars themselves will watch your play with awe!

… Better get started then.

It’s showtime, Siffrin!

[agentrouka-blog]

GRRM hasn't said anything outright but I knew he would have the same feelings about hotd as he did about GoT before hotd even aired. Maybe he was being optimistic as he was going to be more involved in hotd but he made a choice and took the money.

He seemed okay with season 1 of hotd despite what it turned out to be. Though I do wonder what his thoughts were when Condal told him they were erasing Nettles. That the HBO adaptations have decided that the Targs are the super special chosen ones, no other characters matter and that it's all just a long sad story about the special Targs and their dragons being killed when the world would be so much better if they reigned as gods and everyone bowed down and worshiped them because they're here to save the world.

At least GRRM got to season 4 of GoT before he noped out. Though if there's only 3 or 4 seasons of hotd then emotionally noping out after season 1 is the same thing happening again.

Maybe the Dunk and Egg adaptation will cheer him.

Yeah, I'm not surprised he seems to quietly hate it. The fundamental refusal to accept the underlying principles of the source material is... staggering and frustrating.

I choose to be optimistic about Dunk and Egg because it's (I think I heard) going to be much shorter and to the point, and it's harder to mess it up because it is a much simpler story that is only just setting up the tragic moral downward turn that HBO doesn't like. It's a different genre of medieval fantasy. No dragons. Tourneys and travels and glimpses into the edge of high politics. A view from the bottom. A promise of reinvention.

They aren't doing Summerhall, they aren't giving us Aegon's descent into the same tyrannical desire for dragons, down the line. They aren't giving us Dunk going down with him. It's a boy prince and a tall lowborn quasi-knight. It's Brienne and Podrick, it's Bran and Hodor, it's Arya in the Riverlands, only minus the worst parts of war.

Not to downplay their abilities, but it would take another level of determination to ruin that setup. Then again, maybe they'll dig even deeper.

[talenlee]

Game Pile: Murdle

At its core, Murdle is just a little daily puzzle game in the same vein as Wordle. It’s a game where an investigator gets a bunch of simple logical clues and you put them all in a grid and then you arrive at a solution for the murder mystery that’s coherent, compliant with the clues and often enough, wrong. It’s great fun. I want to talk to you about how much fun I have with a pencil and a tiny silly murder mystery a day.

Okay, back in the day there were these things called Newspapers. The news was scribed on trees, then those trees were rolled out really flat, so as to make pages, that could then be folded together and rolled up again and thrown at people’s front lawns by children on charmingly raggedy bicycles, as my Newspapers were supported in part by the advertising of goods and services in their pages, like people could just tell the newspaper, ‘hey, I got things to sell, here they are,’ or ‘there are services I can do’ or even ‘I’m looking for work,’ and the newspaper would take a modest fee and present that information to the public. There was a time, I cannot make this clear enough, but there was a time when newspapers were really normal, and even something centralising for the lives of kids and parents.

Like, an adult would get the newspaper, and they’d want it for some reason; the current events on the front page, or the TV guide in the middle of it, or the sports on the back, or the classifieds next to the sports, but none of that mattered to me, growing up. What mattered to me was the one page which had comics on it, which also had the horoscopes (satan’s devilry), and over on one half of it, the games.

There were bridge games. There were crosswords – you know those things you watch smart people solve on Youtube now? – and towards the end of the 90s, we saw this new ‘Sudoku’ thing.

Sudoku is a great game. May not be your flavour, but Sudoku at its core is a game about methodically working out a sequence of related puzzles, closing off a large possibility space with smaller and smaller qualifications of what does or does not matter to it. I love Sudoku, which is how you know I turned forty recently.

Murdle is a cousin of the kind of game of Sudoku. If you’ve played Dishonored 2, you know that riddle that is so annoying it drives the heart of a level, to look for a solution? Turns out that type of riddle is its own thing! And that type of riddle is a logical grid puzzle, which is based on developing exclusions.

And okay, look, you can just play Murdle. It’s a game available on the internet, with a daily release in the same vein as Wordle. It loads nice and fast too, because all its graphics are actually done with Web Materiel – the characters are icons of unicode and emoji, the grids are all tables. This does mean that there’s a certain procedurality to everything – you’re not going to be dealing with puzzles that feel tailored or specific.

But okay, so I played Murdle for a few months on the website. The daily pattern of a single puzzle every day was just a tiny bit frustration, and what was worse was that sometimes I’d get confused or distracted from the game and realise I wanted to restart. Resetting the website is actually hard, because you have to click all the slots into neutral. What if only there was some way, get this, some way to make Murdle but to make it so it’s not a website? Something more reasonable, something more low-tech.

You know, something like paper?

For Christmas that year, my sister got me the two books of Murdle mysteries, and y’know what? Y’know what’s great?

You can just rub all the puzzles out. You can get halfway through it, you can make a mistake, you can realise you’ve gotten confused, and then, with this type of website stylus, a pencil, I can make my own reasonings in the puzzles there. I can share pictures of the puzzle over discord with my family to see if they can solve it. I can even get some use out of my erasable friction markers! How cool is that?

Weirdly, I don’t want to do Sudoku with a pencil. Too many pencil marks.

Now, there’s nothing remarkable about this. Material objects have an appeal to them; a book is disconnected from my computer, and that means that time spent sitting on the sofa with a book and an erasable pen is time not spent in front of a screen, looking at light, and resting in the same chair I so often do. It’s a chance to disconnect, and it’s also something I can do as much as I want to do – no waiting for the rests of the website, and no sense of urgency of a clock in my eyeline.

People like me, especially people in their Boring Years, the Elder Millenial Class, make a whole point of how much we value our time away from computers after merely spending fourteen hours a day on the computer give or take breaks to go get a drink or a snack or whatever, and it’s a pretty tedious point by now. Get a load of us, noticing how we’ve created a bad habit and now we’re discovering ways to change that bad habit! Next thing you know we’ll be talking about how it’s a good idea to get to bed at a consistent time every night!

It is, by the way.

Anyway, Murdle is an interesting thing to me because it’s something where the lower-tech version of it is more fun to me than the high-tech one. The one that is less convenient works for me better. The one that I don’t want to use where I use everything, the one that breaks differently, the one I have to look up to make it work, that is the one that I like better.

That’s not to say it’s better.

It’s to say that it’s showing me something about me I like better.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[stayarmytinyzenmoa-l]

NCT Spooky Season [Day 8]

Mirror Troubles

TW: Vampires, Implied Assault (Turning into a Vampire), Some implications of depression Genre: Romance, Light Comedy Pairing: Lee Ten x Reader YN Pronouns: Not specified Word Count: 1.0K Prompt: Vampires. What more is there to say?

[NCT Masterlist] | [NCT Spooky Season Masterlist] | [Yesterday] | [Tomorrow] [Ao3 Link] | [Wattpad Link]

Notes: Random ish but I've been so into Castlevania recently. Disclaimer: Please remember that this is an AU and a work of fiction, obviously the idols mentioned/written about in this story would never partake in these actions. The idols mentioned in this work are meant to be seen more as face claims rather than the actual idols themselves.

Feedback is greatly appreciated!! Thank you for reading!

"No, no, you're missing it," you shook your head and Ten groans in frustration. "Ten, why don't you let me-"

"No! Absolutely not!" He shakes his head and holds the brush in his hands again.

"Wait, at least let me wipe off the part you missed," you held the cotton in your hands and leaned over the sink so you could erase the eyeshadow on his cheek and his eyes move over to look at you. "Why are you so adamant on doing it yourself anyway, it would be easier if I helped you.

"Because I have an eternity left, I should at least find out how to do eyeshadow."

"Okay, well, why are you using a mirror, then? You can't even see yourself."

"I need to for the vibes, (Y/N)," Ten rolls his eyes, stating it as if it was obvious. "You wouldn't get it, you can see your own reflection."

"Well, yeah, but is there really no other way to see your reflection?" You leaned against the bathroom counter.

"Unfortunately not, not even in bodies of water," he shook his head and held the brush to his face again.

"Maybe try feeling for your eyelid first this time instead of just going ham, Ten," you offered.

"Yeah, yeah," he do so and, for the first time tonight, he successfully spreads the beige hue over his eye.

"Hey! That's the way!" You congratulate him and, with a small smirk, he does the other eye. You could tell he was excited with the way his fangs slightly poked out of his smile. Since Ten had been, rather unceremoniously, turned into a vampire he'd been in a sort of slump when it came to things he used to enjoy doing and you'd been trying to help him every step of the way, providing support whenever you can, and slowly Ten had started picking up those activities again. The only one that he hadn't was makeup, which both of you tackled now.

"Okay, now eyeliner."

"Alright, settle down, cowboy," you held your hand out, "one triumph at a time, you already got base and shadow done, eyeliner might be a whole different ballpark without a mirror," as you explained, Ten shook the liquid eyeliner bottle in his hands.

"It'll be fine," he says.

"How on Earth are you going to get them even?!"

"I was a pro when I was alive, I'll be a pro undead," he says confidently. But you were still worried, you were worried that even a slight mistake will send him back in his cocoon and undo all the work you'd been putting out. Ten was right, he was a pro back then, hell, he even did your eyeliner, so even a small mistake now might spell catastrophe.

"Okay, Ten, if you say so," you leaned back on the counter so you could see him work and, again, his eyes move over to you.

"Could you help me though?" He asks quietly, focused on getting the small brush to start on the middle of his eyelid.

"Of course," you lean over closer to him so you could see better, "you're right at the middle."

"Good," he places the brush against his skin now, slowly tracing it along his eyelid and, hey, he was actually pretty good at it! Until he got to the end of his eyelid.

"You wanna wing it?"

"Yes."

"Okay, what kind?"

"Just a straight one."

"Okay," you shifted on the counter as he dragged the wing out and, "stop." He does so.

"Alright," he says without removing the brush, he has to get the angle right. "I'm trying to move off of muscle memory here."

"And so far you're doing really well," you nodded, but Ten still hasn't moved his hand. He takes a deep breath and, slowly, he brings the brush back, "and stop," you said quietly just as the brush hit the crease of his eye. And now came the hardest part of the wing, filling it in.

"If I start coloring outside of the lines, let me know," he says.

"Of course," you watched him fill in the wing slowly and you had to say that you were impressed, he really still was a pro. He puts the wand down and turns toward you.

"How is it? It's not ugly, is it?"

"Ten! It looks really good!" You turn his face so you could see it better under the light. "You've still got it!" You encouraged him and he let out a sigh of relief, habitually turning to the mirror and seeing only your reflection. "Think you can do the other eye?"

"Not with these shaky hands I won't," he holds his right hand up and you notice the slight tremor in it, "I was so scared it'd look bad," he shakes his head.

"I get that but, hey, it looks sharp," you commented, bringing your head slightly lower so you could look at him. "Kind of a statement too, one-eyed-eyeliner."

"It kind of is, huh!" He holds a hand to his cheek. "Alright, let's go out."

"Wait, seriously?"

"Yes! I'm in a good mood, let's go clubbing."

"Right now?!"

"Yes." He walks out of the bathroom and you followed him quickly.

"I have to get dressed!"

"Then hurry up before I change my mind," he rolls his eyes and turns to you only slightly, lips upturning into a slanted smile when he sees your bigger smile. You couldn't help but be happy, this was the first time he willingly chose to go out since the incident.

General Tag List: @stopeatread @bat-shark-repellant @raeincitizen @umbralhelwolf @yangsrose @kazooms @sadcoffeecritic 

NCT Tag List: @cherrylovr @minjiville 

If you want to be added to either tag list or removed just send me a reply to this post, and ask, or a DM and I’ll add you as soon as possible!

[imraespace]

warninf this ask is very long…….. i yapped a lil too hard im sorry ☹️🙏

HIHIIH HELP I JUST SAW YOUR POST I ACTUALLY DONT KNOW HOW I HAVE THE PATIENCE FOR IT like for my first bachisagi animation i.. was doing that for a full 15 hours..! not my proudest moment but i was dedicated. i got 35 likes #VIRAL!!! stop im so salty about it 💔

and then i made an itoshi brothers angst animation it got a little more attention in a short amount of time but it still ended with like.. 37 likes HELPME STOP I WAS SO DEDICATED AND IT WAS KINDA FUN ☹️ like as i rewatch it like obviously i can see mistakes that i would probably be able to fix now but it took like 3-4 days to actually finish so thats.. 💔💔

and then we have other animations that i dont even wanna consider thinking about bc forgot but i remember doing a nagireo one and it was 3 imgs BUT I DID IT SO QUICKLY THAY WAS THE PEAK OF MY ERASING CAREER. i got 42 liked hashtag ated hahstag egoist

so now im working on the sae mala thing that like you suggested but the fanart im tweening on is like i dont even know i just dont wanna do it bc i spend more time erasing and getting hair particles and atoms that i somehow only see when im actually finally animating.. 💔

okay wait back to the usual daily rant HIHHIIHIHI HOW ARE YOU POCKY I SCTUALLY CUT CARROTS IN MY COOKING CLASS TOFAY i think i did smth to my thumb bc it hurts so much pelase icanr do thid i cant even type properly im still shaking AND IT WAS LEGIT 30 MINUTES AGO HELP

bluelock friend irl like that person i met theyre a little strange to be fair bc they were like “youre so pookie i wanna just squish you and throw you out the window” and i thought it was funny so i laughed but the more i think about it the more im liek WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN HELPHAHAAHAH like i reallt dont care that they said that but i feel weird around them sometimes bc theyre really unpredictable and i legit only see them at school but we dont actuallt text?? im more of a texter (as you can see..) than an irl convo person like im the type of person who would talk to someone for like 8+ hours online but then once i see them irl i just slowly turn around and walk away when i see them bc IM TOO AWKWARD 💔💔 but i do still wave at them

OH THAT REMINDS ME ABOUT WAVING yk that one scene in episode nagi (?) i think its in episode nagi where kurona is like “lets devour japanese soccer chomp chomp” and he does that w his hand I BASICALLY DO THAT BUT WITH WAVING?? i used to do like a different type of wave like basically i put all fingers except thumb down and would do that repeatedly IDK WHAT THAT WAVE IS CALLED HELP but ive adapted it into the kurona chomp chomp thing somehow. OH AND WHENEVER I DO THAT I ALSO GO UP TO THE PERSON AND LIKE INTERTWINE?? fingers w them and im like HIII and i wave while holding their hand 😈 call it an excuse to hold hands w people but it ends up being torture for them bc i force them to never let go

BUT ANYWys when i did the kurona thing it kinda.. looks like smth else so bluelock irl friend has a weird view to it like bro please let me just devour japanese soccer like kurona 👿‼️‼️

OKAYAYA DAILY QUESTION ISSS UMMM since im in the library rn which bluelock character would be the worst librarian ever and probably end up ripping all the books by accident while putting them all back on the shelves or lose all the books somehow

- 🐙

I love the yapnation asks dw

OH THANK GOODNWAS BC IM ABT TI PELT MY PHONE why the flock I chose to animate 4 pictures bro LIKE I'll probably do the two ans loop it.. BUT THE ACTUAL EDIT I WANT IS WITH 4 PICTURES but I'll do that like when I have patience to redo it yk! ALSO SO LITTLE WHAT THE FLIP that's so frustrating I hate it I'm rn looking at my old edits and i cab relate there's one with 50 likes and one with 40 AND I REMEMBERED STAYING UP SO LATE DOING THAT the only highest edit I made that's tweening is a kaeya edit with like 200 likes 😒

ALSO HELP IKR all the small details that only I gonna see but it's fun to do! after all the hair pulling work seeing it come to life is so hehehehhe🤭🤭🤭 yk!!

HAII IM hot (😉😉😉) but no like it's hot and I'm gonna melt into a blob also I'm hungry! TODAY IN SCHOOL my typing class was nawt it I hatd that teacher sm AND.I HAVE A TRIPLW TOMORROW OHMYG9SHHHH bro as soon as I heard the bell ring my heart dropped to my pinky toe today... THEN SHE STARTED YELLING IN CLASS AND SHE CALLED A STUDENT AN IDIOT ans I was dumbfounded I thought i was next BC YK MY LAPTOP CHARGER BROKE SO I CANT DO MY HW so when I had to tell her I was like "miss" ANS SHE YELLED OUT MY LAST NAME I ALMLSTED TRIPPEd AND WHEN I TOLD HER SHE WAS STARING AT ME LIKE 😐 SO I STARRD AT THE FLOOR then she was like okay. THEN OGGOSH IDK IF SHE DEAF OR HARD IN HEARING BUT EVERYTIME WE RESPOND TO HER SHES LIKE "EH?" LIKE OPEN YOUR EARS then that's when she called the student an idiot and started yelling at her and I almosted cried for her... SHE STARTED CRYING AND I FELT BAD but then bell ran and everyone dipped and I HAD TO BE THE SLOW ASS TO LEAVE THE CLASS BUT EVERYONE RUSHING LIKE CALM DOEN DANG I DONT WAN A BE IN HERE WITH HER AND SHE WAS RANTING TO ME and I was like yah..! then we told our homeroom teacher hehehehhe um I drew a bone in bio today. that's all I have to say abt how I'm feeling!

anyways your strange friend sayings sounds like something I'll tell my friends and theyre always like "oh.." like whag🙄🙄🙄 accept my love! but fr half of the time it doesn't even make sense and I'll ask me self wtf am I talking abt

SAME IM A TEXTER AS WELL bc the things I say online I won't say irl like I don't even swear irl and it's not like I can't say it bc my mommy doesn't mind it BUT IM SCARED TO SAY IT? once I said ass on accident bc I was reading something out loud to my mommy and I was like gasp! and she was like what🤨 AND I TOLD HER I SAID ASS and all she said was ok. my favorite thing to do online is swear at someone in dialect bc I can get more creative since its the locals! my favorite one is "hyc" and I won't share with the class what it means bc.. it's kinda head scratching.

I WOULD SAY SAME BUT I WONT WALK AWAY ILL JJST WAVE AND SMILE IF THEY SMILE AT ME but if they don't then I'm blanking you

OMG I DO THAT AND I ALSO like move my fingers separately in a down movement IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT AND IT STARTED OFF AS A JOKE BUT now it's a habit and half of the time no one knows that I'm actually waving.. BC THEY WILL STARE AND SMILE

HELP INTERTWINE FINGERS? also I agree devour them! chomp chomp

ERM ERM shidou HELP or otoya

[hortaheart]

My feelings on him flip flop depending on the episode, but mostly I hate him for how he treats B'Elanna, and how he hogs screentime despite being a boring character. Like, he was clearly put there to be the Obligatory White Guy for white male viewers to relate to, his interests and attitude and father issues all scream Everyman. And I really resent that! I wish Star Trek, and TV, had been past that already!

Basically every other character is more interesting than him, not to mention his holodeck activities are boring as hell and take up so much screentime. It's really grating to have to watch a recreation of an old sexist sci-fi program in the show that was supposed to be landmark for women. It feels like paying a toll or something. It sucks. It's just not funny.

Not to mention, so much of his character is not taking other people's feelings seriously. (Unless intensely convinced.) He's always making fun of B'Elanna for what he perceives as her "Klingon traits" (wildly exaggerated regular human behavior and straight up not true) and it is really racist! They present it like the rhetorical boy tugging on a girl's pigtails on the playground because he likes her, as if it's harmless and charming.

When, in "Lineage", we can see how much that exact behavior was really traumatizing for her in her childhood. (Not that we needed A Backstory to recognize his behavior as wrong, it just hits way worse after seeing that.) It's also funny, because "Lineage" is the only episode that I feel successfully portrays their relationship positively and meaningfully. But it simply can't erase all his behavior towards her in previous episodes.

It's actually wild how differently his character is written when he's Joking and you're supposed to laugh along, and when he's Serious and you're supposed to take his caring seriously. B'Elanna is easily hurt by his jokes and flippant attitude towards her, but he never stops. And when he finally is sweet in An Important Moment, how are we supposed to take that total dissonance seriously? There's no consistency or accountability! It's frankly reminiscent of sexist old sitcom couples! She’s treated badly for jokes, and then connects with him in “heartwarming” moments later that don’t address the mistreatment at all!

I'm particularly horrified by how in "Infinite Regress" when Seven is possessed by the memories of a Klingon Warrior and makes unwanted advances on B'Elanna, she asks Seven if Tom put her up to it.

That one line hit me so hard. He's supposed to be the closest person to her on the ship, someone who she can rely on to care about her, and he acts so badly that she thinks he might get a socially inexperienced friend to impersonate her species and sexually harass her? As a horrible prank? Like. Jesus Christ.

Wow I didn't expect this to become an essay. Honestly, generally my attitude toward him is he's Fine. He's Okay. He's got plenty of good moments and a couple good episodes. He can actually be a little funny on occasion. But you asked for reasons why I hate him, and well... Turns out there's a lot. Lol.

(And I wasn’t gonna actually post this, but I just saw more defensiveness over him and, ugh. Some people are so incredibly, easily dismissive of others earnest analysis of racism and misogyny, like it’s just meaningless because he acted nice in two episodes. Or because they’re projecting ulterior motives on the people who take issue with it.

I understand when accepting criticism of something one enjoys makes one enjoy it less, but that’s something to grow past, not indulge. It’s never okay to dismiss people’s complaints about bigotry without even trying to take them seriously, just because a person has a favorite. It’s so frustrating to see that behavior in people who do care about the bigotry in the show, but only when it doesn’t conflict with their preferences.)

Voyager fandom, please explain to me why you hate Tom Paris.

Genuinely asking after seeing the results of that poll. Please, gimme the reasons.

[amandapanduhreads]

2024 Book One - The Housemaid's Secret (Review)

Dates: 1/9/24 - 1/10/24 Pages: 318 Rating: 7/10

First book of 2024, and first book review on here! I decided to start doing some longer reviews on here so I can hopefully remember the books I've read, and don't have to ruin my wrist by writing them in my reading bullet journal.

I'll put the review underneath a cut because THERE WILL BE SPOILERS. Open at your own risk!

I read 'The Housemaid' in October, it was actually the first book I read on my Kindle. I had a free trial of Kindle Unlimited and had heard some good reviews about it so I gave it a whirl. I really liked the first book, so I immediately added the next two books to my library because I was sure that I'd read them both before my trial was up on January 11th. Obviously, some things came up and I didn't really read in December and then remembered that my trial was up on the 11th, and not the 24th like I had thought. So I started this one two nights ago.

At the end of the first book, there's an epilogue and I was really excited about seeing the continuation of the story and seeing Millie's venture into her vigilante life. Starting this book, I was excited to see who she was going to help next and how, but I'll be honest, I was kind of let down.

I actually almost DNF'd this book because I realized that it was the same formula as the first book rather than a similar continuation. Millie goes to help a woman, husband ends up dead, big twist, Millie ends up okay in the end. With only a few tweaks, that was the same case in this book. I was hoping it would still be similar with Millie helping women out of terrible situations, but I didn't think it would be so similar.

It reminded me of my thoughts on the movies 'Hereditary' and 'Midsommar'. I had super high expectations for Midsommar because of Hereditary, and I was kind of let down. If I would have seen Midsommar first, I probably wouldn't have set my expectations so high and been let down. If I had read this book first, and then the first book, I think I would have been impressed but coming from the first one and how everything came together, I was expecting more I guess.

I found myself getting so frustrated with Millie to be honest. Her pushing things off and sabotaging herself, it kinda got annoying. That's probably just a minor nitpick but when it all bit her in the butt, I was kind of saying a silent 'I told you so!' Obviously it turned out alright for her, but she got frustrating.

I also thought that the whole Xavier thing was a little pointless? With what ends up happening with Wendy, Millie would have been in trouble with the law anyway so it seemed like a random plot point to throw in. Sure, it helped show that Enzo was still helping behind the scenes, but there were also other things. It seemed like a forced plot point to cause tension that really served no purpose in the grand scheme of things. Honestly, if that whole storyline was erased, you wouldn't even notice.

I have to admit, I wasn't expecting Wendy to be behind all of this and pin it all on Millie, so there's that. After finding out the truth about Wendy though, I thought she was INSUFFERABLE. I know that's probably the point, but part of me didn't even care what happened to her because of how unlikeable and rotten she was. I mean at least in the first book, Nina had *some* redeeming qualities but Wendy had zero. If there was no closure with her, I wouldn't have cared.

The Marybeth plot twist was also out of left field at first, and I'll be honest that I thought Enzo had set her up to go kill Russell and Wendy. I was also so irritated when I thought Millie was going to go kill them, especially after the call with Detective Ramirez. I was worried that she'd go be impulsive and wind up in more trouble, but seeing it was Marybeth had me relieved.

Speaking of Ramirez, the whole "now you have a friend in the police department" thing was a tad bit cheesy to me. Sure, it probably helps set up the next book, but it seemed so cheesy.

Enzo is my favorite and I know he's technically not a good guy either, but like....come on. I will say though, if it turns out Enzo is actually not to be trusted in the next book, I'll throw a fish.

The whole ending with Millie ending up as the one who gave the heart medication was pretty good. I'll be honest, when Brock asked for his heart medicine, I did a bit of an, 'Ohhhhhh!' thing because I wasn't expecting it, but it was a good little tidbit.

Overall, the book wasn't terrible and even with the cheesy stuff, I read the whole thing. I'm still bummed out that it was just the same book with some different characters and a few more random bits. I honestly don't know if I'll read the third book, but maybe I will down the line.

To sum up the book, it reminds me of reading a Lifetime movie. You know it's ridiculous and corny, but you keep reading it all.

[sondersil]

this was supposed to be something else entirely. now it's my evil alter ego, Eden Reed. what a dick. wish i had his hair.

[snarky-wallflower]

okay, you know what? there are exactly three people interested in this and that's enough for me to ramble a little bit. fair warning, i never got much into the actual DEH musical, but i know the basic plot and characters. I'm working off of that.

we open on Samullux standing in the dark. he looks around in confusion. Slowly, one by one, the stars appear, and it should warm his heart--but we see unease on his face instead. It quickly shifts to shock, though as we see that through their light, he can see Rose.

She's standing near their old home, the place they once wrote stories about her Visions, stories about the future--but it's empty of the light it once had, dead and cold.

She turns to look at her brother. There's no joy there, no excitement. Just a tired sort of anger, looking at him across of the remains of their home.

And Rose snaps--Is it good?/Are they giving you a world I could never provide?/Well, I hope you're proud of your big decision/Yeah, I hope it's all that you want and more/Now you're free from the agonizing life you were living before!

To me, she fufills a familial role--the desire to protect her brother, and she couldn't stop him from making the wrong choice. Rose has the weight of that responsibility--her visions have only warned of terrible things to come, and Itzal promised Samuel a bright future, instead.

Samuel stumbles forward, trying to reach Rose, to explain--but then we cut to Margaret, illuminated in moonlight. She's to the right of Samuel. In my head, she has the energy she had at the end of Benjamin's Apartment/The Radiance, right now. She cooly says Does it cross your mind to be slightly sorry?/Do you even care that you might be wrong?/Was it fun?/Well, I hope you had a blast while you dragged me along.

I've been seeing Samuel and Margaret as partners in this AU--and given that she was the Great Enchantress, I'm running with the assumption she was once complicit in Itzal's regime. But Margaret left. She got out, and is working to be better. Samuel isn't, and they both know that. She won't allow herself to be dragged along anymore.

We see Samuel mouth, Margaret, please--

But it makes no difference. It just keeps on going.

Fom to the left of Samuel, close to Margaret--we hear Dakkar's voice. It is just as angry as the rest of them. I promise this makes sense with the lore I have in my head--his inventions are a major part of the way Itzal has been able to advance Chazira in this AU. Samuel's pen is no exception--Dakkar created it himself, to expand and strengthen Samuel's own powers. And if somebody's in your way/Crush them and leave them behind/Well I guess if I'm not of use/Go ahead, you can cut me loose! Dakkar has been useful to Samuel, and we see him glaring down as he advances, a cool sort of rage I think that man could excel at. (Plus, I think cut me loose works exceptionally well in other areas, given that Dakkar was the one sent to Earth here!)

Margaret and Dakkar exchange a look, determined and hard, right before they come together to walk towards the man who has caused them so much pain. there's a shot of the tide siblings advancing on Samuel, him backing up--and he bumps into Rose before he can stop himself. He turns to see her looking at him with disappointment and frustration, hands flying up in anger--

I'll shut my mouth and I'll let you go/Is that good for you?

Samuel shakes his head, trying to tell her no. but she keeps on going, joined by Margaret and Dakkar's voices. It's a gorgeous, pained chorus, and it is making Samuel utterly horrified and miserable.

The Piercing Light crackles and burns in Samuel's palms, as he grips tight to his pen--unable to stop them from advancing, horror clearly in his eyes, and he's desperately trying to get them to stop--All I need is some time to think/But the boat is about to sink/Can't erase what I wrote in ink/Tell me, how could you change the story?/ All the words that I can't take back/Like a train coming off the track/Stop it, stop it, just let me out! But no matter what he says, they won't listen, even as his eyes go wider and wider, even as his voice cracks.

Those he has lost because of what he's done are walking across the ruins of a home he helped to destroy, trying to make sure he sees all of what's become of what he once had. And just as they're inches away, tears in their eyes, Radiance burning far-too-close, regret and devastation and anger written all across their faces--

Samuel wakes up.

It's all been a dream--a nightmare, really.

There is no one there beside him that can sympathize with him. Who would help him through it. There hasn't been for a long, long time.

There's a beat, a breath of silence as we see him try to recover. Alone.

The animatic ends with his hands clutching at his sheets, and a shot of a shaky smile in the dark.

(even now, he won't accept just how deeply he's hurt the people he cares for. not only to himself. the love is there, it will always be there--but it will never change anything, so long as he refuses to accept his wrongs. and to me, this version of Samuel is never going to do that.)

anyways.

can you tell i think about this a lot?

Samullux animatic to Good For You, you will never exist outside of my brain but know that I think of you often and love you dearly.