Tumgik
#one of my top faves and also the character I started off with my first run so he's got ''first pick'' bias as well
loregoddess · 8 months
Note
Osvald for the ask meme
Hecking love this guy...
how much I like their personality: Very much, which was a surprise to me. For a variety of reasons, I'm not fond of the "emotionless or emotionally stunted intellectual who prizes their lack of emotion as proof of their intellect (or else the intellectual with an utter lack of understanding of emotion in general)" as a trope (I am not summarizing that trope well, but, y'know, that trope), so I started off a bit wary every time the narrative made it seem like Osvald didn't know what love (or other emotions outside of revenge) were, but his narrative dovetailing into "actually he has known love (and other emotions) all along and just didn't have a name for them bc he was so preoccupied with his research, but actually he has loved and loves very deeply and this is a key aspect of his characterization" was a really nice subversion of my expectations and fears, and as a result Osvald ended up being a really interesting character. I love the duality of his focus on his research and rather blunt way of speaking being juxtaposed with how deeply he actually cares, and how despite at the beginning of his story where he believes himself a hollow shell of a man who can only seek vengeance, that he's actually so full of care for his family and the other travelers, and he actually does understand emotions even if it's not like, in a conventional way and not quite to the same level or type of emotional intelligence as a few of the other travelers. I just think Osvald's a really interesting, great character!
how much I like their design/aesthetics Overall, I love his character design! I think leaving the prison chains around his neck was a weird design decision, esp. after his main story arc is beaten (hey if they could take the cuff thingy off Therion after story completion, Osvald could have gotten some new clothes...), but overall I feel like his design reflects his characterization very well. He has this big, tall, hulking figure, and comes off as rather intimidating at first, which is fitting because he starts off as hellbent on revenge and also he can literally mug people at night, but then we learn that Loving Father is deeply ingrained in his core personality, so that the hulking figure becomes more like that of a protective mother bear (or Juvah, to quote Ochette). I felt like the designers also did a good job having his general appearance change to reflect his life circumstances (i.e. before the murder of his family, his hair is kept tied back, he's always dressed nicely, it's very heavily implied this was partly Rita's work but we still get the sense that his life is "together" as a result; whereas after breaking out of prison his hair is unkempt and he wears his old prison rags because he can no longer focus on living, with all his energy going towards his vengeance quest; and then of course we get how he's dressed in his ending art which I feel speaks for Osvald's entire character arc and growth very nicely). The overall choice for a color palette focused on browns and beiges was a nice touch too, because brown can very easily be made to look like a cold color in certain lighting, but likewise can be a very warm color depending on the light, which reflects the duality of Osvald's characterization very well too. I'm uh, gonna wrap this up here bc character design actually is my passion and we'll be here all day if I try to go over every aspect of his design, but as an artist with an interest in character design, I think Osvald's got a strong design overall and I like it a lot.
how interesting I think they are As stated in different ways above, I think Osvald's very interesting! Would probably write up an entire analysis of his arc and characterization and other stuff if I had the energy and time.
how well-written I think they are Overall I liked Osvald's writing quite a bit. His narrative arc was one of my favorites from the game, and I felt like the story beats and his characterization came through very clearly. I also felt that the turning point in his narrative (Ch4) was one of the strongest narrative turning points out of all the travelers (only being beat out by Castti's for my personal favorite of the mid-story turning points). Despite my love of a good ol' fashioned revenge tale, I was delighted by how Osvald's arc subverted my expectations without any of the plot twists or reveals feeling contrived or out-of-place. Especially on my second run with The Knowledge Of What Happens, I have an appreciation for how his story is being set up and how certain things were hinted at earlier if not outright foreshadowed. Very enjoyable writing overall!
(if applicable) how much I like their mechanics in-game Octo2 has some of the best game mechanics of any jrpg I've played (for my personal tastes), and Osvald's definitely one of my favorite characters to play. He starts off a bit of a glass canon, but with the right setup of equipment he becomes pretty sturdy quickly enough. I like having him in the cleric class because of the access Mystic Staff, and Holy Light is a useful single-enemy offensive skill to use for when Osvald's latent ability isn't full, but he does well in pretty much any class I stick him in, and his personal EX skill is one of my favorite EX skills from the entire game (although as to the divine EX skill well...I've literally never needed to use Teach so uh...that one was more of a miss for me). One of my main damage-dealers in endgame teams, and I used him specifically to churn out high damage hits in the fight with the optional superboss (that's all he did the entire battle), that's how powerful he ended up for me.
if I think they are a Good Person(tm) I'm not really invested in fictional character morality, but sure, even with the mugging and stuff Osvald seems like a decent enough person. Probably wouldn't be one of the main protagonists sort of implied to be chosen by the gods themselves to safeguard the world otherwise.
2 notes · View notes
ahundredtimesover · 7 months
Text
I Want You to Stay (07) | JJK
Tumblr media
Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut
Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; eventual explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)
Chapter Word count: 15.4k
Series Masterlist
Tumblr media
Status: Ongoing
Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You’ve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.
Playlist 🎶: on the way home
Tumblr media
A/N: One of my fave chapters! I hope you like this one! And just a heads up that intervals between posting days will be longer as the chapters get longer, too. And bc u know, life... HAHA but again, thank you so much for all the love for this like??? HOW. PLS you've all been so nice so thank you! 🥰 Also… JK in that SNTY suit.
And as always, my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight  🥰
PS. If I can’t tag you, pls fix your settings!
Tumblr media
Mr. Ri loads the luggages in the trunk and you double check that all bags - which you helped pack yesterday - are complete. You enter the car right after and head to the airport where Jungkook will fly to Singapore for a few meetings and to attend Seokjin’s alcohol launch party. 
It’s been over a month since the Arts Center event and so much has happened since then. Jungkook went to Jeju to meet an artist and then to Japan over a weekend to meet another two. He’s been on calls with a few more with plans to meet in their country of residence in the next months, and he’s gone around different local towns to meet with craftspeople for souvenirs and future exhibitions. He’s also touched base with various national and international Korean arts and culture organizations for promotion and joint projects. The event opened doors for a new network that he hoped for. There are now proposals for other collaborations and side engagements that’s doing a lot for the company’s brand and expansion. 
To say that Jungkook and the team have been busy is an understatement. You went back to work after those few days of recovering with everyone overwhelmed by all the things they had to do but like you expected, you all managed and got things organized. There are still multiple things to handle all at once, but everyone’s just been on top of everything and showing how competent you all are as individuals and as a team.
Within that period, Jungkook has stopped by the team’s office and the pantry more times than those first months. He also managed to laugh at Do-hyun’s unfiltered remarks a few times and even slipped his own that got the team giggling. He’s seemed a lot more relaxed and so has the team. Lunch meetings have been regular given all the work you all have to do. Yohan and Chin-sun even say that they’ve gotten to know Jungkook a little better through their visits to the Arts Center. And while they do think he’s still a bit detached and catch him in his own world sometimes, he’s a lot more engaged and is actually way smarter than they’d initially thought. 
Jungkook checks his phone and sighs, prompting you to turn to him.
“Seokjin says the party is an intimate event but there’s gonna be over two-fifty guests so I don’t know about that,” he shakes his head, showing you the restaurant bar where his friend will be launching his alcohol brand. “For some reason, he expects me and Tae to entertain guests on his behalf.”
This was another development you hadn’t expected. Since that morning when Jungkook sent you food when you were unwell, your relationship changed. It’s still professional but there’s more openness now, as if that prompted both of you to be comfortable around each other. 
There’s more trust and honesty, too - he lets you make decisions, lets you handle the team when he’s away, and asks you for your unfiltered opinion. You feel like all the time you spend together has allowed you to learn how he sees and understands things; you even finish his sentences sometimes. 
He’s also loosened up a bit and allows himself to laugh and smile more. They’re still rare occurrences but you never point them out, not wanting him to feel awkward and then stop. They often catch you off guard so you haven’t been able to fully appreciate them but at least he feels comfortable around you, enough to even talk about non-work stuff and things that fill his mind, like random questions or small concerns. 
You’re unsure if he notices how uninhibited he’s become but you don’t point it out either. He still has his moments of living in his head, his faraway thoughts rendering him quiet and observant, and his perfectionist attitude means he’s still critical sometimes. But he doesn’t take anything out on you - not his frustrations nor his fears. He’d usually keep to himself and talk to you once he’s cooled down and you’d take that any day, so long as you keep your sanity and are able to do your tasks as instructed.
In return, you let yourself be the same. You’ve fully restored your confidence and that’s allowed you to show just how capable you are. You’ve been more vocal with your thoughts, too, and don’t take it personally when he doesn’t agree. You smile a lot more, joke with him even, and have been more generous with words of encouragement and affirmation. They come more naturally than you expected, and you appreciate that he doesn’t turn you away whenever it happens.
He’s actually okay to be around when he’s not being grumpy or difficult. You suppose that the situations he was put in - and how you responded with patience and understanding - allowed him to see that you’re truly on his side and that let him put his guard down a little. You’re past trying to please him for the sake of making your job bearable; there’s actual joy in it now, and while the search for who you are outside of all this continues to ring in your head, you think that sticking around for now isn’t so bad either.
“Perhaps Seokjin has seen how good you are with entertaining guests now and deems you worthy of being an extension of him,” you respond to Jungkook’s earlier musings. “And he wouldn’t be wrong. You’ve become really good at it.”
“You know, I think you oversell me sometimes,” he chuckles. 
“Hmm, I think I don’t,” you counter. “If I may say so, Mr. Jeon, it's just that the bar was pretty low so the improvements are quite striking.”
“Fair enough,” he laughs, not taking offense.
“You can still do better at charming people. Maybe you can learn a thing or two from Seokjin and Taehyung,” you push.
“Those two flirt, they don’t charm,” he playfully rolls his eyes.
“Well, I completely disagree, sir. I mean, I’ve seen it firsthand. And I’m not one who’s easily charmed.”
“Fine, I’ll see what I can pick from them, then,” he concedes.
“Kidding aside, I think you’ll be fine, Mr. Jeon. Plus, it’s unrelated to work so there’s no need to impress anyone,” you state. 
“True,” he hums. “But just thinking about these next few days is already making me tired. Tae rented a yacht for tonight. We have Seokjin’s launch tomorrow, and to celebrate, he’s throwing another party the day after.”
“Hmm, must be that you’re getting old,” you tease, earning you a hum in agreement. “But you’re used to that though, right? They always said that was your life back in Singapore.”
“It was. I had less responsibilities and people to manage but back then, everything seemed too much,” he shares. “I took the weekends seriously and really just did whatever I wanted. I haven’t done much of that these past weeks because I’ve been so tired and I feel like I’m under the microscope when I’m here. So yeah, I’ll probably just take advantage of being back there and just enjoy it.”
“As you should,” you say. “You’ve worked hard and you deserve to spend your weekend however you wish. Just, uh…”
“What?”
“Probably give Lucas a heads-up in case a half-naked woman greets him in the kitchen on Monday morning.”
The silence is deafening and you think you’ve crossed a line with this one. You turn towards him and he looks stunned at your unfiltered remark.
“I’m so sorry, Mr. Jeon,” you bow in apology. “That was too personal.”
“It’s okay,” he responds after a beat of silence. “I guess I deserve that. I mean, I never apologized for the morning when you experienced exactly that. And for when you found that underwear on the floor, which I forgot to clean up. So, uh. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, too. I got over it,” you assure him. “And if anything, I’m pretty sure she left that on purpose so she’ll have a reason to come back.”
“That’s exactly it,” he groans. “She saw me again and wanted to go to my apartment so she could get it. I told her I threw it away.”
“How brutal,” you tease again.
“Not my finest moment but yeah, I’m sorry to put you in that position. Must’ve been tough seeing proof of all the washroom gossip.”
“You know about those?” You gasp. 
“I’ve heard about them,” he sighs. “Mr. Ri’s got eyes and ears in the office.”
“It’s hard to defend so I just don’t try,” the older man shakes his head. “Not like you deny it anyway.”
“Not like I really care,” Jungkook shrugs. “But even then, I guess it wasn’t the best start for us,” he tells you.
“Perhaps not, but I’m not one to judge, Mr. Jeon. That’s all in the past now, and that feels like a lifetime ago.”
“It does,” he hums. 
It’s during these casual exchanges when you get to see a bit more of Jungkook as the person that he is, beyond the perfectionist executive who still harbors fears and worries about his new role. He’s still a human being who finds ways to deal with the stresses of life, someone who needs time to step away from his burdensome responsibilities, someone who seeks intimacy and connection and finds ways to attain them in his own ways. The doubts and worries are still there, but the foundation has stabled a bit. Somehow you think that you’ve created a space safe enough for him to talk about them, to apologize, and to try to be better. You hope he gets to create that for himself, too, and if that’s what you’ll leave him with by the time you decide to step away from this job, you think you’d be satisfied. 
Silence engulfs you both and like he often is after being vulnerable with you, he keeps to himself once again. You wait a while before running through his meetings for today and next week and inform him of what the team will be working on while he’s away. Jungkook responds with a few last-minute instructions, especially about the tasks he needs done in time for your team meeting on Monday. You’re both back to professional talk and you don’t really mind; there’s something about being honest and open that could be a bit disarming.
The car stops and Mr. Ri exits to retrieve the luggage from the trunk. Jungkook, in his navy blue suit, gathers his things and says goodbye. Before he can close the door, you call out his name.
“Yeah?” He asks, his one hand carrying his bag and the other, on the roof of the car as he bends to look at you.
“Happy birthday,” you say. “I know you think it’s just an ordinary day but I hope you celebrate well.”
“Thank you,” he says after a few seconds, basking in the softness of your smile for the short moment that he can.
Jungkook steps away then closes the door. He heads to the airport lounge before taking the 6-hour flight to Singapore, spending it on reviewing reports and design proposals. He goes straight to the office when he lands, settling down in his room where he responds to emails. He munches on some dumplings for lunch, thinking he’s missed the ones from the restaurant across the street, but then Lucas enters and sets down a bowl of seaweed soup.
“Ms. Cho asked me to get this for you, Mr. Jeon.”
Jungkook is caught off guard but manages to dismiss Lucas and tastes the dish. It’s nothing like his mother’s, but then again, he hasn’t had it in years. When Jungkook moved here, there were no celebrations apart from getting drunk at a club, which is also why he’d stopped thinking of his birthday as anything special. There were no traditional meals or well wishes or birthday cakes.
He’s here again. There’s that yacht party tonight but it won’t feel like a celebration. Somehow, with this bowl of soup, this does. You’re a thousand miles away but even then, he still feels your presence. Even then, he feels more cared for than he has these past several years combined.
Tumblr media
Jungkook wakes up the next morning with a splitting headache. His neck feels a bit strained, given that he’d slept in an awkward position wearing his clothes from last night. He also barely remembers much. One minute he was drinking with a woman around his arm and the next he’s… here. 
He shifts and lays flat on his back, groaning as last night’s happenings manifest in the soreness of his entire body. The yacht was fancy, as he’d expected from his best friends. There was overflowing food and drinks, the music was great, and the guests were honestly too many for his liking. There were familiar faces and new ones, but he mostly stuck around with those he knew. What he also remembers is not being able to taste his cake. He’s definitely calling Seokjin to complain.
Suddenly hit with the thought of not knowing how he’d gotten home last night - or with whom - Jungkook sits up and groans once more, the incoming call adding to the ringing sound in his head.
“Mr. Jeon,” Lucas answers on the other end. “How are you feeling today?”
“Terrible,” Jungkook says, now finding the strength to get off the bed. “Did you take me home?”
“Yes, sir. You wanted to leave so Mr. Ri and I took you to your penthouse,” Lucas answers. “Your valuables are on the table.”
Jungkook sighs, knowing it was one of those nights. Removing his clothes, he sees the fresh marks on his chest. Wanting to prepare himself before finding some stranger in the other room, he asks his assistant if he’d brought someone home with him.
“No, sir. It was just you. She, uh, she asked to come but you told her you were too tired so she stayed behind.”
“Oh, good,” Jungkook exhales in relief, not wanting to deal with any of that this morning, which is one reason why he always asks them to leave. “How long do I have until I have to get ready for tonight?”
“About five hours,” the younger man replies. “You have a scheduled dinner with your friends at 5:30 and then the event at 8. I’ll be there before that to help you get ready.”
“Alright, thanks. I’ll just workout to deal with this hangover.”
“Medicines are in the cupboard, sir. Please just let me know if there’s anything more you need.”
“I will.”
Jungkook hangs up and presses on his temples as if that’ll do anything. He retrieves the medicine as advised and thinks of something else he needs - a cup of lemon ginger tea. Ever since you’d prepared one for him that one morning, he’s been having it after every night out. He calls the butler to have it prepared for him, given that he doesn’t have the energy to do so himself. 
It arrives, and coupled with the aspirin, he’s starting to somehow feel better. He knows that heading to the gym will do the trick, as it always does, but it still makes him think that he shouldn’t have drank as much as he did last night. 
For someone who’s not particularly fond of people, even Jungkook sometimes wonders why he goes out and parties as much as he does. 
He wasn’t always like this though. His weekends used to be spent on food trips and travels, but after the breakup with Chaerin, those days became free, and he’d stay out late so he could sleep the rest of the next day. The women were to make up for the loneliness; the alcohol was to forget why he needed them in the first place. He hates loud and unnecessary sounds, but the music and the chatter started to become white noise for him; they’d become a companion to help deal with the noise in his own head, or the lack of it. 
Years later, the remaining thoughts in his mind were just all about work, and he’d revert to the same habit for relief - the women became his thrill; the alcohol was so he wouldn’t remember them. 
And it works. The ecstasy lasts only through the night. It’s fleeting as his desire for them is. He doesn’t recall names, just that they made him feel good and that they felt the same; they often try to hook up with him again after all, seeking him in the clubs they know he frequents. But he rarely entertains them; a second time leads to a third, and he can’t be assured that they won’t ask the same tiring questions he hates hearing - why doesn’t he have a girlfriend? Why doesn’t he want to commit to anyone? Does he see himself settling down and having a family? What’ll make him want that?
It’s happened a few times, during the rare instances that there’s a lull in between and they take advantage of his brief period of vulnerability to make him open up. He never does, and it’s not because he thinks it’s a weakness to do so, but he just never really let the moment linger to find out. 
After a light meal, Jungkook heads to the gym and spends three hours expending his energy so he could get it back. 
This is his other means of dealing with his stress. Working out makes him focus on something else and it helps in releasing all his anger and frustration. As he stares at his bare body in the mirror right after - the marks from last night still visible - he scoffs at himself. 
He’s so stereotypical, it makes him sick. He’s allowed himself to let his life revolve around the shallow and fleeting sensations of pleasure to counter the permanence and inevitability of his job. This is his world and he made it this way. And while he drowns in the nothingness inside the walls that he created, he still thinks it’s better than being outside; somehow he thinks it’s lonelier and more burdensome out there. At least in here, he’s all he has to deal with; he’s all he can disappoint.
But there are still moments when he wonders what it could be like if he just dared to live differently. Like when he watches Seokjin animatedly explain the history and creation process of Korean traditional alcohol during the product launch that evening and how his passion is moving and infectious. Or when he observes how Taehyung freely moves around the club and makes connections with others as deep as his smile. 
Jungkook thinks about all this as he glances at the woman next to him later that night, bare under the covers like he is, her body curled into a cocoon as she takes a break. 
She’d caught his eye earlier because she wasn’t trying to get his attention like the others were. She spoke less and screamed more, let him do what he wanted but touched him softly as she pleased.
“You’re a good lover. Why do you waste yourself with something temporary like me?” She’d asked. 
It left him speechless and he shrugged - a change from his usual dismissal - but there’s really nothing to say. 
Why does he? He doesn’t know. He doesn’t want to. 
But it’s at this moment that he tries to imagine what it would be like if it were the same face he saw next to him every morning, if it were the same hand he held everyday, if it were the same warm body he curled into every night. His mind wanders too far, into the depths of a place it can’t go to, beyond boundaries he can’t cross, and the sight is both terrifying and calming. 
It’s safer where he is.
So when she wakes up from a short nap, she looks up at him, her soft eyes wishing for something she knows she shouldn’t.
“You should go,” he says, the softest he’s ever uttered the words. 
“Okay,” she whispers in submission. 
She gets up from the bed, finds her stray clothes on the floor, and puts them on. Jungkook follows her to the door, a first for him. Maybe it’s her gentleness, or the unspoken understanding between them, or maybe because she doesn’t ask for more even if she seems to want to. 
But though he contemplates pulling her back to try to feel what that’s like - seeing her in the morning, holding her hand, curling into her embrace - he doesn’t. He knows even that desire would end; it’s fleeting just as everything around him is.  
He holds open the door. She turns around with a smile.
“I hope someday you find someone you’ll ask to stay,” she says, surprising him again. “I’m sure they would.”
Tumblr media
You walk around the store in awe of the luscious plants displayed on the shelves, your eyes as bright as the lights that shine over them. There are so many to choose from, and though you have an idea of what you want to have, it’s tough deciding which ones to get right now. The money tree is a must, so is the Chinese evergreen. But do you go for the orchid or the peace lily? Can you keep up with a spider plant? How many of the asparagus ferns should you get?
Your eyes flit from one plant to the next, eventually deciding on getting everything on your list then placing them on the cart for payment. 
Jimin chuckles next to you. “Since when were you a plant mom?”
“Since she got that aloe vera from Yoongi and she was convinced that she has a green thumb after it didn’t die,” Soomin deadpans next to you as you frown at her sarcasm. “That’s also after my weekly reminders to water the plant because ‘no care’ doesn’t actually mean it’s going to survive on its own.”
“Oh, shush,” you scoff at her. “You told me I was doing a good job.”
“You’d send a photo every few days, hun,” she laughs. “What else was I supposed to say?”
“True. I needed the encouragement,” you shrug, paying for your haul. “But also, I’m a plant newbie. Yoongi said that I probably need some of them at home and in the office for positive energy and he’s not wrong. All the frustration from months ago just accumulated in my apartment and I need a change.”
“So… Is Yoongi a plant dad, too?” Soomin wonders.
“No. He just knows about a lot of things,” you reply. “Plus, he’s an architect and a designer. He knows a thing or two about plant decor.”
“Why isn’t he here with you, then?” She arches an eyebrow.
“Because I’m with both of you, duh,” you roll your eyes. “And before you say anything more, I don’t really like mixing my work friends with my personal friends. It’s different.”
“Well, I’m glad we could join you on this new phase of your life,” Jimin tries to be encouraging. “It’s like turning over a new leaf.”
You scold him over his terrible pun but laugh anyway, enjoying the comfort and playfulness that only your best friends could bring. They picked you up from work last Friday then you all headed to a club after dinner. You spent yesterday at a beach at their insistence then stayed in during the evening. It’s now Sunday and you’re dragging them around as you run errands before saying goodbye to them again, and it’s not a normal day without Soomin mentioning Yoongi. Perhaps it’s because of all the guys you’ve mentioned that have taken interest in you, he’s the only true green flag; he’s also the only one you didn’t entertain at all. You suppose that’s something she’ll not really get over. 
The three of you head to a nearby cafe. Jimin excitedly talks about the latest menu item in their chain of restaurants while Soomin groans about the stuff she has to deal with as she manages her family-owned shipping company that’s the biggest in the port city of Busan. They turn to you and ask how the rest of your week is going to go, with slightly surprised looks when you don’t talk about work with as much disdain as you used to. There’s excitement, even, something that Soomin points out, and when you mention that Jungkook is on an overseas trip, she assumes that’s the reason why.
“Not really,” you clarify. “He arrives tomorrow evening, but the week’s packed - we’re visiting the Arts Center for inspection and then I’m doing an ocular with Chin-sun for the VP events we’re holding in the next few months. I mean, I won’t be buried in files nor will I be in meetings all week. So yeah, it’s not bad.”
“That’s good,” Jimin beams. “At least it’s nothing like how it used to be. Right?”
“It’s a lot better, I told you guys,” you say, reminding them of a similar talk you had the last time they were here, which was a week after you’d gotten sick. “Jungkook is… rational, less grumpy and impulsive; he also listens to me and trusts me. He’s even smiled a few times.”
“Wow, he really set the bar low for you, huh,” Jimin chuckles, earning him a nod.
“Does that also mean that he’s now completely bearable and no longer your type because he’s not an asshole anymore?” Soomin chimes in, being the blunt and bold one among the three of you.
“He never was my type in the first place,” you scowl. “Plus, he’s literally my boss, Soo. That’s like, not some flag, it’s a whole ass brick wall that shall not be crossed.”
“Right. That’s why Mr. Min didn’t make the cut,” she points out. “Told you you should’ve just quit your job so you could date him.”
“And I also told you that wasn’t the only reason why I didn’t want to,” you remind her. “Yoongi’s exactly the type of person I need in my life, and being more than friends is the surefire way of making sure that doesn’t happen. Like, why would I risk a good friendship for something that may not work out? Whether I break his heart or he breaks mine, it’s pain I can’t handle. There’s just no going back from there.”
“Right, that is your biggest fear,” Soomin replies softly, the sympathetic tone in her voice telling you that she does understand where you’re coming from. “I mean, it’s still possible that you wouldn’t hurt each other but I get it. It just sucks, I guess. The good ones often start as your friends.”
“I know. And I’d rather have them and be single than none at all,” you sigh. 
The thought is simpler than it seems. You won’t deny that you’ve thought of how things would’ve been if you gave Yoongi a chance, but the fear of what you’d lose always trumped that type of possibility. 
There’s a kind of pain you don’t want to experience, one of a broken heart caused by losing someone you’ve given your all to. It’s how you think you love, after all; you can’t give any less. But it’s also why you’ve never done it. No one’s inspired that kind of devotion for you. 
Soomin has pointed out before that it’s probably also because you don’t open yourself up to the possibilities as you should. Maybe you’ve just been too focused on other things. But maybe you also just haven’t felt the kind of all-consuming desire for someone who would be worth it, one you’d want so much that you’d willingly face the fear of paralyzing heartbreak just to be with them. 
You suppose that’s the difference. That’s the irony, too. You’re scared to love because you’re scared of the pain, so you keep your distance to keep yourself safe but it’s also why you haven’t found someone you’re willing to crawl out of your walls for.  
There’s not much you feel passionate about in life. Maybe it’s love. But you’re too cautious to feel it, to look for it, so you don’t really know. Maybe it’s something else completely, and working in the environment that you do hinders you from discovering it. You’ve kept your distance from a lot of things over the past years and the thought that one day, you’ll be able to feel free from all the burden you carry because of a past you couldn’t control, makes you look forward to the day when you get to walk away from all those and hopefully, find whatever it is you’re looking for. 
Jimin nudges you after you zone out, and you switch the subject and ask about the latest gossip in their hometown. You enjoy living vicariously through their social life back in Busan. They not only come out here to Seoul to see you but also to take a break from all the drama that they can’t really escape from, given the type of people in their circle of friends. You always thank the heavens you got lucky that at 10 years old and making a new life in a new city, you found Soomin and Jimin, perhaps the only other people aside from your mother who make you feel safe and protected, a feeling you don’t take for granted. 
They indulge you and share some stories, but when Soomin goes through her social media feed to show you something, she gasps instead when she realizes that the men in her friend’s Instagram post include Jungkook.
“Did your boss just go there to party?” She asks, showing you the photo.
“Partly,” you reply. “His best friend hosted the launch of his alcohol line there but there are a couple more parties because it’s his birthday weekend. Your friends went?”
“Yeah, some of them are Kim Seokjin’s friends, apparently,” Soomin says. “Small world. But then again, I shouldn’t be surprised. Seoul and Busan socialites attract each other.”
“Why aren’t you there, then?” You chuckle. 
“We’re choosy socialites,” Jimin clarifies. “Or like, pretentious. We just act like we are but we really aren’t, just to say that the Park and Cheon kids are interesting and sociable like the rest of them.”
“Who says they’re interesting and sociable?” Soomin states incredulously. “My eyes roll to the back of my head every time I’m in those shitty events. The lack of self-awareness of rich people repulses me. And I obviously don’t count us in.”
“And you shouldn’t,” you confirm. “I attract good people, I guess. I’m glad you’re not like them.”
“Well, what about Jungkook’s friends?” Jimin asks. “How are they like?”
“What I can say about the Kim brothers is that they’re nice people,” you say. “Very charming, ridiculously good-looking... And they sound like good friends, too. I can’t say much else. Their dating game is pretty strong though.”
“I’d assume. I mean, when you look like that, how could you not be?” Soomin states. “I mean, even Jungkook’s on point. That’s some hot girl he’s got.”
She shows you a couple of Instagram stories from her friends posting about the launch party. It turns out, there were a lot of Korea-based personalities who were invited. You spot Jungkook immediately, wearing the all-white ensemble that you packed for him the other day. His hair is a bit curled and the knitted top underneath the simple coat highlights his taut physique. There’s also that gorgeous woman around his arms, and if what you know about him is enough, you’d guess she’s probably one of those he seeks for a good time. 
The sight of him loosening up a bit and enjoying himself is something you appreciate. He’s always stressed when he’s here and you’re glad he could spend a few days partying elsewhere without having to think about work, especially during the week of his birthday. You don’t know how much of this aspect of his life he enjoys, but he does seem a bit free yet still somehow detached. You suppose that’s something he’ll always be - a man trying to live his life while separating himself from the meaning of it. You’re unsure of how he does it but perhaps it’s not that different from how you are, too. 
After lunch, Soomin and Jimin do a few more of your errands with you before dropping you home and then heading back to theirs. You spend the rest of the evening arranging your plants in your tiny apartment and feeling like more life is breathed into it with every one of them finding their home in a corner or on a shelf. Oddly enough, you feel a bit less lonely. That’s how you think you’ve been doing things, after all - finding substitutes for the kind of company you’re yearning for, for the kind of relationship you’re so afraid to have.
Tumblr media
Jungkook wakes up that Monday morning feeling a lot better than he did the days before. For one, there’s no ringing in his head nor the feeling of dehydration. Bare under his soft covers, there also aren’t any fresh marks on his chest that signify the kind of night he usually has. In fact, he remembers most of it - he stayed by the bar and briefly chatted with the women who’d approached him. 
Suzy was there last night, too, the only one he’s hooked up with more than once, and probably the only one he’s had proper conversations with, given that she’s a landscape designer. She’s been away on business trips and had just gone back, her bluntness about going back to his apartment that she’s too familiar with being met with a rejection that she didn't take personally. 
“Has Seoul changed you?” She asked, her eyebrow arched in anticipation of his reply.
“Do you think a place would do that to me?” He laughed.
“No, but a person would,” she shrugged. 
“None of that,” he shook his head. “There’s no one. I’m too busy, too tired.”
“But not too lonely?” she asked. “It’s the only reason why you would call me.”
There was no bitterness in her words but still, he asked. “And why did you always come, then?”
“To see if each time would be good enough for you to not make me leave.” 
The conversation took a turn that he didn’t expect, the usual honesty in her words being too honest for him. He fumbled for something to say but she shook him off, claiming that she knew what she was getting into every time he took her home and that constantly hoping for something doesn’t guarantee that she’d get it one day. 
He drank a couple of glasses of whiskey after she left but managed to call his butler for a sandwich and lemon ginger tea in time for his arrival at his penthouse. The meal did the trick, as he’d slept soundly after a warm bath without a splitting headache and regrets the next day. 
It’s Monday, after all, and it’s back to work as usual. He has a few meetings to attend before flying back to Seoul, one of which is with the team. He gathers the energy to get off the bed for a half-hour exercise before getting ready. He eats the breakfast that the butler orders for him then heads to the office where he briefly meets with Lucas. 
Settled on his desk, he proceeds to virtually meet with the team, who all promptly greet him from the conference room. He asks how their weekend was, with most of them looking surprised because he rarely asks them about it, but they answer anyway. That’s when he notices that you’re not around, prompting him to look for you.
“I’m here, Mr. Jeon,” you answer off camera before appearing on screen with a candle-lit cake in your hands.
He’s surprised when the team sings him a happy birthday, your eyes fixed on him as you mouth the words with a soft smile on your face. Do-hyun giggles at his silence, saying that he probably forgot it was his birthday or he maybe didn’t expect that they’d prepare something for him. 
“We like you now, Mr. Jeon,” she teases, earning him a nudge from Chin-sun but she doesn’t seem to mind and neither does he. 
It’s what makes him laugh, hoping that the pink on his cheeks aren’t visible on screen. He hadn’t expected this. He also knows he doesn’t deserve it, but he’d bet that you had everything to do with this.
“You’ve probably been too busy to celebrate but we haven’t forgotten. More like, Ms. Cho made sure we remembered,” Manager Lee chuckles. “We hope you enjoy this little something we prepared.”
“It’s an ice cream cake so it’ll just be in your refrigerator and you can have some when you return,” you say. 
“Thank you,” he finally manages to say. “You didn’t have to but I appreciate it. I’m looking forward to having some when I get back. Ms. Cho should also buy another one big enough for the team to share.”
You nod in acknowledgment of his instruction before starting with the meeting. There’s a lot to talk about, given the Arts Center construction and activities, as well as the upcoming year-end events that they have to organize and coordinate. It goes on for over two hours and it ends with your gentle smile after he says goodbye.  
The rest of the day feels too long for Jungkook, especially during the late afternoon flight and eventual ride home. He stares at the photo you sent of the cake, making sure he sees the greeting on it. 
“Get home safely, Mr. Jeon,” you text him after he says thanks. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
With the reminders of the impermanence of things and people this weekend, Jungkook finds comfort in the stability that you provide. It’s in your smile, in your reminders and organization of his life, in your thoughtfulness and patience. It’s in the assurance that tomorrow is another day, one in which he gets to see you once again.
Tumblr media
The cake is simple but sophisticated. The mint chocolate flavor is exactly how he likes it and in ice cream cake form, it’s really delicious. He’s glad he gets to have this all for himself, as the team was able to enjoy one yesterday as per his instruction, and you’d sent a group photo of everyone enjoying it to him, the small smile that formed on his face no longer surprising him. 
For one, the comfort is there. He’s seen just how much better the team is working together because of it - they’re more open to giving him feedback and receiving his, any moment of frustration is easily mended with laughter, and his encouragement and affirmation have been motivating them as well. In the midst of it is you who makes sure that communication flows smoothly and that everything is on track, acting as the glue that keeps everyone together. 
He sees firsthand just how good you are at handling things, and how despite all the stress, you manage to get him seaweed soup and a cake for his birthday. It’s more than just the details regarding work that you’re on top of; it’s also details about his life, and how he’s responding to it tells him that maybe, whatever change there is like what Suzy observed, a big part of it is because of you.
“I’m glad you like it, Mr. Jeon,” your voice cuts through his thoughts. 
He looks up and sees you with a portfolio in hand, motioning towards the cake that’s now one fourth eaten.
“Ah, yeah,” he says, not denying it. “I feel like I haven’t had sweets in a while. Where did you buy this?”
“Oh, uh, I asked the baker who made desserts for the Arts Center event if she could make a customized ice cream cake,” you explain. “Fortunately she could. And thankfully it’s delicious. She enjoyed working with us so she gave us a discount.”
“You… had this made for me?”
He’d expected it to be store-bought, but learning you made the effort to reach out to someone reminds him once more of your thoughtfulness, of your care.
“Yes, I, uh, I just assumed you’d receive a few and I thought to give you something a little different.”
“It’s the only one I got actually,” he says, catching you off guard. Your face falls a little so he follows it up. “Like I told you, I don’t celebrate my birthday so I don’t let people know about it. And the ones who do also know that I don’t make a big deal out of it so they don’t really give me anything.”
“Oh,” you say, feeling a little sad. 
You’re not one to have big celebrations but you do have a bit of it. For your 30th birthday at the start of the year, Jimin and Soomin threw you a little party in your humble home in Daegu where they performed some of your favorite songs and enacted your favorite drama scenes to make you happy. There was no need for anything fancy - just your loved ones and your mom’s and Min-woo’s amazing cooking. 
But even before that milestone, your friends always made sure to at least get you seaweed soup and a birthday cake; they want you to remember that there are lives impacted because you were born. You can’t really say that Jungkook’s impacted your life the same way but you still value his existence; a small cake is just a little something to celebrate that. But the idea that his family and friends pass up on the cake - and perhaps the gifts, too - makes you think that there’s really not much in Jungkook’s life he feels he could share with others, that there’s not much he could give and receive in return. 
“I hope I didn’t cross a line if it’s something you don’t like people knowing,” you continue. “I just thought… it would be nice to receive something from us.”
“It actually was,” he admits, his voice soft and low. Turning away, he says, “it’s been a while since I actually thought about my birthday as anything other than ordinary. It’s nice to be reminded sometimes. So thank you, Ms. Cho. For the soup, too. I appreciate it.”
Perhaps it’s his honesty that does it, but you can’t help the smile that forms on your face. If learning how to express gratitude is something you could teach him, you already feel accomplished. 
It’s the next day when you find yourself back in Jungkook’s office, staring at the potted plant in your hands. You’ve gone from debating on whether to leave it on his desk or the coffee table, to even giving it at all. You won’t lie and say you didn’t know what you were thinking when you passed by the plant store after work last night to get this specifically for him. You did - you wanted him to feel that joy of receiving a gift, which you suppose doesn’t happen, especially for someone who can literally buy anything he wants. 
But still, it doesn’t mean that your good intention will be received well. You’ve given Hoseok a small gift every year for his birthday, partly because he likes receiving them and also because it’s your way of saying thanks. 
You want to give this to Jungkook as a form of gratitude, too. Despite how you both started, the amount of things you’ve learned from him and continue to have somehow made up for it, and you also know that he’s learning from you as well. He’s given you agency to make decisions. He’s also given you events and small projects to manage, making you realize it’s what you really enjoy doing. Seeing things come together the way you envisioned it is so satisfying. Perhaps without intending it, Jungkook’s showed you a way out, a path that you want to explore so much that you’re willing to let go of all that you know in this company for something new, for something that feels more like you. 
Your thoughts have completely digressed and with the time you took debating and reflecting, you hadn’t heard his footsteps, and so you jerk a little when he calls out your name.
Turning around, you bow in greeting, remembering at the same time that you have something that you’re not 100% sure yet you want to give right now. But as always, he calls you out on it. 
“Is that a snake plant?” He asks, walking towards his seat.
“Yes.”
“Is that the one on your desk?”
“Uh, no, actually,” you laugh dryly, knowing you can’t turn back from it now. “I… I meant to give it to you, sir. I just thought that, uh, the money tree on the shelf might be too lonely so I got you a desk plant. I heard it’s good for positive energy and to filter the air.”
“It is,” he hums. “Is that why you got yourself one?”
“I suppose. I figured it could help improve my mood. Yoongi suggested it before but I just kept pushing it back. I finally got some for my apartment last weekend,” you explain, just so he knows it didn’t come out of nowhere. 
“And you think this will improve my mood?” He arches an eyebrow. 
“Maybe,” you shrug. “We’ll probably need a dozen of them here but we could start with one.”
He matches your soft laughter with his own, which you’re thankful for. He reaches out for the plant, nonchalant like you when your fingers brush against each other. 
“Hopefully this will work,” he says as he places the small, white pot next to his desktop. 
You leave him so he could prepare for a conference call while you’re set to meet with the marketing team. Jungkook gazes at the plant and notices the little note attached to the string around the stem. 
Happy birthday, it reads. 
This wasn’t just something to match the money tree that Hoseok left for him that he hasn’t been caring for much. This was a gift for him. You probably assume that if he doesn’t receive birthday cakes, he wouldn’t be receiving gifts, either. And you’d be right. His best friends just throw him parties. And once he left Seoul to obtain his MBA in Singapore and stayed to work in their Southeast Asian headquarters, the distance between him and his parents grew. They’d reach out but he didn’t bother much, so he’d stopped expecting anything. After he broke up with Chaerin, he stopped receiving anything at all. This is the first time he’s gotten something from someone after a long time. 
It’s simple in its meaning and honest in its intention, and he doesn’t hold back the smile that forms on his face.
You watch the realization dawn on Jungkook from outside. You’d remembered the silly note you left right as you sat down and didn’t have time to take it back, which really wasn’t much, but you suppose it’s enough to tell him that the plant indeed is a gift. You don’t know if someone like him even receives them, or would even appreciate something so cheap and humble, but the gentle smile he has on tells you that he probably doesn’t get much, but that this is something he welcomes. 
Your smile follows soon after but it feels different this time. There’s pride somehow that your little gift could elicit something so rare out of him. There’s also a bit of awe; this is the softest he’s ever looked, with that tinge of gratitude and yearning, a complete contrast to what you know of him, to how you’ve always seen him. It’s… it’s actually beautiful. 
And this is when things start to get confusing, especially as your phone beeps with that SMS from him.
[From: The Boss] Thank you, ___.
It’s the non-work message. It’s the use of your name. This is personal for him and you acknowledge that it’s the same for you. Perhaps there’s a reason why you made the effort to get the gift last night, why it mattered to you that he received something to celebrate his birthday, and why seeing him appreciate it the way he does is making you giddy and satisfied at the same time. 
Maybe it’s the care you’re starting to feel for him that’s beyond just wanting to make your job bearable. You’ll dissect what that truly means later on, but right now it’s just you, him, and the glass wall in between the both of you. There’s distance, there’s a boundary, but there’s a transparent barrier that allows you to see what’s on the other side, one which allows you to know who he is behind the man you’ve come to know. And you admit, he’s not so bad after all.
Tumblr media
The construction of the Arts Center is going better than expected. Given some of the delays due to the wrong materials delivered and some permits that took a while to get, the workers were able to make up some ground, largely due to Jungkook’s supervision. When you both visited a few weeks ago, there were many things to work on, and he managed to identify the priorities and find ways to get the project back on track. 
It was during those few days of constantly being on site that you saw how efficient and effective he really works. You admired his precision and attention to detail, how he instructed the team leads and project managers and laborers, how he put together the design of one of the rooms just as he’d envisioned it. 
He was commanding and decisive, and you appreciated his thorough and simple explanations that allowed you to keep up with him. He’s said that he wants you to understand what’s happening so that you’re well-informed should you need to communicate to others on his behalf, and what initially intimidated you turned into something you became interested in. Since then, you’ve been watching design shows to help you further. The challenge was welcomed, and now you feel like everyday, you’re learning something new on the job. 
His instructions from that time were followed, and you’re back today to inspect the rest of the spaces. Everything is so massive, and with one half of the wall of the performance hall already done, you can clearly see the upgrade. The details are impressive, and the way that the traditional designs merge with modern elements is a feature itself. 
You’re immersed in the intricacies of the ceiling, walking towards the wall to get a closer look that you don’t immediately notice the workers walking past you with a massive slab of marble. The moment that you do, you step back too quickly, tripping on your heels, and just as you brace yourself to hit the ground, you instead feel your back against a firm chest, with hands on your elbows breaking your fall.
You sigh in relief, even leaning your head back because nothing could be more embarrassing than falling on your ass in front of many people, including your boss. That is, until the familiar scent of jasmine and bergamot wafts through your nose and you realize that what you just did is debatably more embarrassing than what could’ve happened. 
The familiar clearing of the throat is what finally does it for you, and with wide eyes, you turn around and face him to apologize. 
“I’m sorry, sir. I—”
“Was so much in awe that you didn’t notice the workers passing by,” he finishes, his slightly teasing smile calming you down.
“Ah, well of course. The details are too pretty,” you reason, stepping back only a little. You look at him shyly. “But thank you. I was about to fall.”
“I know. And I was about to lose it if my assistant got injured on the job.”
“True. It’s bad publicity, I guess,” you shrug. “And distractions could cause delays. And that’s bad, too.”
“Or you know, I simply just can’t have you injured, simple as that,” he says with a little frown on his face. 
“Imagine if I didn’t see them? They could’ve dropped the marble and I would’ve completely lost it!”
“Why?” He arches an eyebrow.
“That slab is like, two months’ worth of salary, Mr. Jeon.”
“It’s actually more but that’s not the point,” he fully frowns now. “If you didn’t see them, then they could’ve hit you, and then you would be whining in pain right now. You could’ve gotten seriously hurt, ___.”
His voice is firm and low, and you nod in acknowledgment because you also know he’s right. The workers’ vision was limited but yours wasn’t; you were just too distracted and if you hadn’t pulled early enough, that marble really could’ve done damage to you. And if it wasn’t for Jungkook catching your fall, then something bad still would’ve happened to you.
“But are you okay? You didn’t twist your ankle or anything?” He asks.
“No. Uh, the heel’s just a bit loose but I’m fine,” you reply, still trying to wrap your head around how he’d said your name - informally, in this setting, as he told you that you could’ve gotten hurt. Maybe you weren’t imagining the worried tone of his voice earlier.
“Okay,” he sighs. “You have to be careful next time.”
“I will, sir,” you reply. 
You step aside and Jungkook sees you from his peripheral vision as he returns to assessing, staying put and only glancing at the ceiling unlike earlier. He’d seen you marvel at the design of the hall earlier, and while he was initially doing the same, seeing you wide-eyed and impressed caught his attention more. 
Many times, he’s seen you look dejected, frustrated, angry. He’s seen your moments of focus and joy, too, but this is the first time he’s seen you be in awe. There was this softness on your face that was still filled with emotion, and he’d been drawn to you enough to see that you were about to fall. He’s glad he has quick reflexes and was able to get to you in time, the worry he felt at the thought of you getting hurt in any way was quite overwhelming for him. And while it’s partly because you’re his responsibility in this case, he also knows it’s more than that. 
He gestures moving to another room and you follow him outside, and just as you try to stay close to him, Jungkook also makes sure you’re away from any kind of danger. He moves to your side when there are workers nearby with their heavy equipment and large materials. He shields you from the drilling. He glances at you as you both walk towards the other performance hall. And when you get there, you see the ceiling installation is ongoing, and Jungkook immediately calls for hard hats for the both of you. 
He hands you one and you put it on, fumbling with the strap underneath your chin. You groan in frustration when you’re unable to lock it, and that’s when you see him move towards you. 
“Let me,” he says.
You stop your movements and shyly nod in agreement, and he waits for you to let go before he fixes it himself. 
It’s a little odd being on the other side, since it’s always you who fixes his tie or his coat. But you’re the one watching him now, with his furrowed brows and seriousness in securing this safety gear on you making you feel warm inside.
He steps back then looks at you, trying hard to control his laughter.
“Are you laughing at me, sir?” You pout.
“No. I don’t make fun of people,” he says, turning serious now, but you don’t miss the grin on his face.
It’s unfair that he looks good even with a hard hat on.
One of the project managers calls him and he goes around, with you staying close by. This performance hall is bigger and boasts of a more traditional design, which would hold the cultural performances that the Culture Minister is very excited about. You watch Jungkook inspect the space with thoroughness, checking each wall panel and each seat. 
It’s amazing to you just how involved he is with this project even with the project managers handling things relatively well. He wants to be on top of everything, he’s said; it matters too much for him to not know what’s going on. 
You see Yoongi enter the room and approach him. Once he sees you, he laughs as well.
“Do I look that bad?” You groan. “Mr. Jeon was laughing at me, too.”
“It’s a little big, and I guess I’m just not used to seeing you in one,” Yoongi shrugs.
“Why don’t you have one?”
“I don’t need it. I’m here all the time and nothing happens.”
“Well, I’ve been here a few times and I almost fell earlier,” you say, recalling the almost-embarrassment.
“I know, I saw it,” he chuckles.
“You were there?!” You gasp.
“No, I was totally in the other room that’s why I witnessed you almost get hit by the marble then trip on yourself,” he deadpans. 
“I didn’t see you, that’s all,” you shrug. 
“I was by the doors. I checked these spaces yesterday and I just wanted to be around in case Jungkook had new instructions,” he explains. “But I gotta say, you guys were kinda cute earlier.”
“Almost falling on my ass isn’t cute, Min Yoongi,” you scowl. “I could’ve either ruined the marble slab or hurt my bum. Either way, it would’ve been embarrassing.”
“I didn’t mean just you. I meant you guys,” he gestures towards Jungkook. “He caught you, didn’t he?”
“Yes… That was embarrassing, too,” you frown. “What’s cute about that?”
“He looked worried. It’s just not something I’ve seen him be towards other people, that’s all.”
“It’s because an injured employee on site isn’t good, okay? Plus, if I’m incapable, then no one’s gonna be around to make his life easier,” you reason.
Yoongi stares at you for a while before shaking his head. “Wow, you really are dense.” 
“I don’t know what you’re on about,” you cross your arms in frustration. 
“Forget about it,” Yoongi shakes his head, deciding not to push it. 
He’ll tell you another time that he’s glad you’re becoming more of yourself again, that the light has somehow come back, that there’s now comfort you exude around the man you’d once despised. Yoongi feels assured now that there’s someone else who seems to be looking out for you, and that it’s something you don’t seem to mind at all.
“Yah! You’re being all mysterious again!” You pout, something he chuckles about. 
“Me? Mysterious? Come on. I’ve always been an open book,” he teases. 
You’re just about to nag him again when you hear Jungkook clear his throat, and you turn towards him and ask if he’s already done inspecting.
“There are still a few things I want to run by my design lead before leaving,” Jungkook says. “Please move my meeting to 3PM.”
“That’s noted, sir. I’ll give Mr. Hong’s assistant a call.”
You excuse yourself and step outside, leaving both men alone.
“Angering my assistant, are you?” Jungkook asks Yoongi, the curious yet playful tone in his voice evident.
“Nah, just teasing. That a problem?” Yoongi answers back. 
“No. It’s good she has someone she’s comfortable with at work.”
“Could be you, you know? That isn’t so bad,” Yoongi remarks, surprising him. “And it doesn’t cross whatever boundary you’re trying so hard to stay behind.”
“We’re not… on that level. I mean, I don’t know how to be someone other people are comfortable being around,” Jungkook admits.
“I don’t know about that. Seems like you’re already that for her,” Yoongi says. “I was just teasing her about how you guys looked cute earlier, when you broke her fall.”
“You were there?”
“Both of you really don’t notice other people when it’s just both of you, huh,” Yoongi laughs. “But yeah, I was. I saw her relief. And I saw you worry.”
Jungkook merely shrugs, not wanting to confirm. Even if he denies it, Yoongi will still believe what he wants to believe. But the older man knows you well just as much as he knows him. 
“You care about her, don’t you?” Yoongi responds to the silence. “And I mean not in a superficial way, or a good boss caring for his employee type of way. Like, you worry when she’s sick or overworking, when she’s hurt or in danger. You want her to always be safe, to get rest. You like having her near. You wanna know that she’s happy.”
“You know I can’t do that,” Jungkook finally answers. “I can’t think of her that way.”
“I know. That’s why you were the way you were,” Yoongi says. “How else do you respond to things you can’t control than through anger and detachment? But just because you shouldn’t, it doesn’t change the fact that you do.”
“It doesn’t change the fact that it’s wrong,” Jungkook counters.
“Well, irrationally calling her out and being angry were wrong, too, and you did those because you weren’t being honest with yourself,” Yoongi argues. “I guess what I’m trying to say is, the least you can do is be true to yourself about how you feel. Because the more you deny, then the more you resist, and when you do that, you end up hurting her. Is that what you want?”
“Of course not.”
“Then just… accept things - what you feel, what you both are, what you can or can’t be.”
Jungkook looks at his friend as if some epiphany had just transpired. It’s been difficult for him to make sense of what he feels around you. There’s always that air of familiarity, but the warmth and comfort are new. There’s the reality that you come from different worlds, but that you both somehow feel and experience and maybe desire the same things. There’s that sense of fear over change and of what he can’t control, yet you somehow provide the calm and stability that he hasn’t felt in a long time. 
It’s all these contradictions that have been messing with him, and Yoongi’s right - because of all the times that Jungkook had wanted to create that distance, all it did was hurt you. That’s the last thing he wants, he realizes now. He’s seen you struggle, and even if that’s just a fraction of what you normally go through, it’s enough to tell him that he doesn’t want you to experience that again, especially not because of him. It’s too early to say the extent of his care towards you, and it’s not something he’s willing or ready to explore right now. But just as Jungkook’s about to comfort himself that it’s fine, and that he shouldn’t dwell on it anyway so as not to further nurture it, Yoongi speaks again.
“Just… just a heads up, though,” he adds. “The care that I felt, that’s how it started for me.”
“What started?”
“Me, liking her.”
It’s at that moment when you come back from your call, and you inform Jungkook that the meeting’s been moved and that he has a scheduled one with some of the directors on Monday. 
“Alright,” he says, directing you and Yoongi towards the souvenir shop, temporarily disregarding what he was warned about.
“You two looked so serious. Everything okay?” You whisper to your friend. 
“Yeah,” Yoongi hums, giving you the most genuine smile he could give. 
There’s that sparkle and softness in your eyes that had captured him all those years ago. They dimmed throughout the years and they’ve just been sporadic, illuminating only during specific moments. He’d seen them again a lot more regularly, and even today, as you looked around the halls and admired the designs of the space. 
Yoongi doesn’t know if a certain person is the reason for that. He knows you enough that you wouldn’t even notice it, so you definitely wouldn’t know what caused the change. But as your friend, he hopes one day you will, so that if you’re brave enough, too, you’d try to make sure that the light stays. 
Tumblr media
The inspection ends and you get back to the office at 4. You return to piles of documents you have to sift through and encode, and your original plan of leaving on time changes. 
Jungkook spends over an hour talking with Yoongi and the construction lead about the Arts Center, and once that’s over, you see just how exhausted he is. He’s massaging his temples and sighing deeply, and you know that whatever just transpired, he’s going to be thinking about it all throughout the weekend, which he doesn’t really have time for. The gala that one of the Board members throws annually is tomorrow night, an event you’ll be attending with him as well. 
You enter his room to remind him about it and to give some forms for his signature. He signs them off, and when you say you’ve got a few more requests that you’ll leave on his desk for Monday, he tells you to just wait until then.
“Go home, Ms. Cho,” he says. “It’s been a long week. And it won’t end until after tomorrow night.”
“What about you, Mr. Jeon?”
“I’ve got some stuff to sort through after inspection. I’ll probably leave in an hour or so.”
You frown, a mannerism of yours that he’s gotten used to seeing. It’s mixed with a pout that often makes him internally laugh because it seems unlike you. It also always means there’s something you want to say that you’re holding back.
“Should I not?” He arches an eyebrow.
“Hmm. Just thinking that it might be better for you to take a rest tonight, too,” you advise. “The gala could be quite draining and it would be good to save your energy for that.”
“I’ll think about it,” he hums.
“Then I’ll think about going home, too,” you answer back. 
Jungkook chuckles, knowing you’re always going to counter him in some way. And he’s glad that you do.
“You may go. And get a good rest, too.”
You nod and bid him goodbye, exiting the room to start packing your things. It’s five minutes later when the door opens and you see him with his bag, ready to head home as well.
You smile at his tender doe-eyes as he admits through them that you were right - he doesn’t have a reason to stay behind, so he’ll call it a night and get as much rest as he can. 
He pauses by the entryway, and you pick up that he’s waiting for you, perhaps to make sure that you’re indeed going home. You quicken your pace and walk next to him, steps in pace as you both go to the elevator and down to the lobby. 
“Mr. Ri can bring you home after me,” Jungkook says. “It’s late already.”
“Not late enough,” you reply. “I’m okay, Mr. Jeon. It’s not necessary.”
He concedes, and you wait for the car to arrive and say goodbye to him again. 
There’s a softness on his face as he lingers before he enters. A small smile forms, and it’s what you see until you fall asleep that night. It’s the same one that’s oddly been giving you comfort lately - it’s a little restrained but somehow it still looks vulnerable. Perhaps it represents how Jungkook’s been to you - there are some contradictions, but beyond all that, there’s care.
Tumblr media
Mr. Ri happily greets you as you enter the car that late Saturday afternoon to head to Jungkook’s penthouse. He compliments your dress, saying it’s nice to see you in something formal that fits your style - it’s simple yet elegant, and you tell him that your mother wouldn’t stop gushing over you through the screen, nagging you to send full-body photos so she could appreciate you more.
Jimin and Soomin surprised you in the morning to help you fix up, insisting that they wanted to make sure you spoiled yourself for the event. If you wouldn’t, they would, so they treated you to the hair salon and had your nails done. They’re the ones who took so many photos like some formal dance, and Jimin commented that the only downside was that they were sending you off to pick up Jungkook. 
Defending your boss the way you did surprised you a little; it surprised them a lot more. You’d said that he bought you the dress, that he’s been nothing but kind, and that whatever negative feelings you had towards him are all in the past. Your friends understood, deciding not to ruin your night and then letting you go so they could eat out and meet you back at your apartment once you’re done. 
You chat with Mr. Ri about how things have been at work, your friends, and your family. You also talk about the gala and how it feels a little nerve-racking attending this time, given your experience with Jungkook. 
It’s a grand event that the company’s executives attend, and guests are asked to refrain from going solo. For such requests, it’s not unusual for them to bring their assistants. You’re expected to attend anyway, and assistants usually partner up with each other and it always worked. You went with Hoseok last year because A-yeong had a work event, and while you expected that Jungkook wouldn’t care for such request and maintain that he’d go by himself, you also didn’t think that CEO Jeon would insist that his son take you as his date so he wouldn’t be alone. 
The elder Jeon had reasoned that business discussions usually take place during the gala, and it would be good for you to be around and be familiar with the new people on the scene. Hoseok had said that they’re expected to stay through the whole thing, and it’s much better for his cousin to have a companion so he could survive the night. That was months ago when things were still a little shaky for you both. You still remember Jungkook’s displeased look when it seemed like he had no choice in the matter, especially since he probably thought that his father just wanted to make sure he’d act accordingly. It feels like a lifetime ago, really, as you think about his soft smile from last night. 
You don’t know exactly what you’re feeling, why his gestures or mannerisms suddenly mean something to you, or why there’s excitement when you think about seeing him outside of work. You’re unsure why the curve of his lips when he grins or the deep huff that follows his laugh makes you a little giddy, or why his eyes lingering on you makes your heart beat a little faster than usual.  
Just like right now, as they gaze at you while you seemingly do the same. 
“You look, uh—” he starts, unable to find the accurate but appropriate term to describe how you look. 
“Nice?” You finish, recalling the term he’d used when you tried this gown for the first time. 
“Something like that,” he chuckles, earning him a giggle from you.
He playfully shakes his head, perhaps knowing that you’re used to him not making grand compliments or anything. But he does smile after, and there goes that blissful feeling again. 
Maybe it’s because for the first time, you’re being appreciated. Maybe just like how it’s been recently, he likes being around you, prefers it, even. And given how you felt so unwanted during his first few weeks here, this is a blessing, as if in his appreciation of you, you’re liking yourself as well.
“Well, in my opinion, you look quite dashing, Mr. Jeon,” you say bravely. “Except your waistcoat seems to be uneven.”
“Exactly what I thought,” he sighs. “I can’t quite align it properly.”
And as you always do, you approach him, your hands immediately going towards his shoulders to flatten the vest, then his sides to pull it down. You adjust it a little bit more then fix his collar after, and suddenly this feels so natural - being close to him, taking in his scent, and smiling as he glances at you. 
“Do you need help with your coat?” You ask once you finish.  
He nods and you follow him to his walk-in closet where you take the last piece of clothing and assist him in wearing it. He adjusts the lapels while you assess if all wrinkles have been flattened. You watch him look at himself in the mirror and you can’t help but admire him as well. He exudes confidence, which you can say now is strikingly different from the Appointment Dinner where he still looked a bit unsure. But now, he commands respect. The deep black color of his striped three-piece ensemble with his slick hair parted in the middle makes him even more handsome, and you manage to hold in the gasp you were about to release as he faces you for a final look.
“All good?” He asks. 
“All good,” you smile, turning around and walking back to the living room. 
He follows, and he takes this time to bask in your beauty before he has to act like it doesn’t affect him again.
There’s a reason why he was rendered speechless the first time he saw you in this gown at the tailor shop, so much so that he had to step out to get some air. You look even more stunning now, with your classic but natural-looking makeup and your styled hair. You exude a certain kind of glow that sucks him in, that makes his heart race yet soothes him just the same. 
It’s a little dangerous for him, given that he’ll be spending this entire evening with you as his date, looking the way you do while he has to act disinterested, as if his attraction isn’t slapping him in the face and his internal alarm bells aren’t ringing.
But he has to act professional. He has to stay behind the lines even if his mind is yelling all the words about your beauty that he has to ignore. So he gives himself this short moment where he gets to admire you, and when you make it to the elevator and become confined in a small space, he holds his breath as you smile at him shyly, hoping that he doesn’t give himself away. 
He’ll get himself together, he orders to himself, and he’ll make sure he doesn’t scare you off. 
You make it to the lobby and enter the car. The drive to the venue is quiet at the beginning. It’s technically not a work day so there’s no reason to discuss work. You and Jungkook may have started talking about non-work matters but it doesn’t mean you readily talk about actual personal things. They’re occasional, as it’s not something he seems to do much and you’re often guarded about yours. It took a while for you to open up to Yoongi and even then, there are many things he doesn’t know. You’re comfortable around him, there’s no denying that, but there are still parts of you that you don’t like to share with others, and you suppose that Jungkook is the same.
But still, you ask how his evening was and how his day went, expecting he’d give a basic answer.
“I just stayed home last night and watched soccer over drinks,” he says. “Then I did my workout and went for a swim this morning. I did a bit of work in the afternoon and then got ready.”
“Ah, no party last night and then recovering from it in the morning?” You tease, knowing that’s a usual occurrence for him. Lucas did mention about the Singapore trip and how he’d taken home a passed out Jungkook on the night of his birthday. 
“Well, there was a party,” he responds. “There always is, but I passed up on it. I didn’t want to feel out of sorts tonight. There’ll be a lot of new faces and I don’t wanna mess up.”
“Oh, you won’t. You’ve been doing really well, Mr. Jeon. And that’s me being honest.”
“Why wouldn’t you be?” He arches an eyebrow. “Would you tell me otherwise?” 
“Well, the me of now, would. The me of a few months ago would want to but wouldn’t.” 
Jungkook dwells on your answer. “Hmm. What changed, then?”
“I got used to you.” 
He meets your gaze and somehow it feels too long. You don’t really know what prompted you to say it but you felt a little bold, a little too honest.
“In what sense?” he wonders, turning away now.
“I’d say I got used to the mood swings but then again, they haven’t been intense compared to those first few weeks,” you admit. “But surprisingly, it’s the calmness I’ve become accustomed to. And the seriousness and occasional zoning out, but also, the…”
Care, you want to say. Or the thoughtfulness. 
“Consideration,” you say instead. 
Jungkook’s throat dries up as he finds the words to say. He’s now afraid to look at you because he might give in and say something he’ll regret. He’s been praised before for his work and his designs, but he supposes that no one’s really complimented him for something he does for other people, specifically for you. Maybe that’s why he thinks he doesn’t deserve it; he’s unsure if he’s really considerate by nature or if he just is towards you. It’s why he brushes it off, insisting he just has his moments.
“But those moments could mean a lot to the one it’s shared with or directed to,” you counter. “Even if it was just once. Or even if it was so trivial that you probably forgot already. But the other person doesn’t. Or they would, but something about that moment stays.”
Jungkook thinks about the moments you’d shown him consideration. Or even care or thoughtfulness, but he wouldn’t word it that way to you. There are the big ones - when you showed your support of the Arts Center to his father, when you calmed him down during that first Board meeting, when you gave him the noodles when he was sick, when you stayed with him during his interview with the magazine publications.
When you stood up to him. When you didn’t quit after that first week.
There are also the small moments - the ginger and lemon tea on Monday mornings when he looks like he’d drank too much the night before, the biscuits you serve with his coffee, the affirming looks during team meetings, the comforting smiles from outside his office when he’s stressed. 
There’s a lot of those you show him, and he realizes now that he remembers each one. 
The silence returns soon after, as you both seem to prefer basking in the soft music that Mr. Ri plays. 
It’s 15 minutes later when you arrive at the venue. You get out of the car and meet Jungkook by his door, surprised when he offers his arm that you take. 
“This is how they do it, right?” He looks at you questioningly.
“Yes,” you chuckle. “It’s a little over-the-top but the hosts treat this like it’s some red carpet event and I just follow what the others do. Bitna says it’s the one time we could feel like proper ladies or something, whatever that means.”
“Hmm, makes sense. I guess I’ll be a proper gentleman, then. Whatever that means.” 
You hold onto him lightly as you both make your way inside. You try to disregard the firmness of his arm and the way it feels under your touch, so you gently let go not long after and clutch onto your purse instead, not wanting to give off the idea that you’re anything more than each other’s dates. You greet the guests and establish your position to those who are unaware in an effort to show that this social event is a work function as well. 
Jungkook talks about the Arts Center when he can, and you mentally take note of certain projects, sites, events, artists, and patrons that are mentioned, quickly typing them on your phone for future reference. He talks to you about them in between flutes of champagne and canapes that are some of the most delicious you’ve ever had.
Jungkook laughs as you down another brie and cranberry bruschetta.
“What? I like fancy food,” you pout.
“Yes, your normal people’s taste buds like fancy food,” he teases. 
It’s a statement you make often and you smile that he now uses it against you.
Your moments of casual ignorance of what’s going on around you are ones you find yourself enjoying too much. You internally sigh every time a guest approaches him, and even more so when you find yourself with a few others and someone stands a little too close, or has his hand linger on your elbow, or whispers something in your ear as if you’re at a bar and the music is too loud, which it isn’t, so there’s really no reason for this son of some business tycoon to be asking you to head outside “to talk.”
“Don’t you have a date?” You ask after he insists. 
“Yeah, some girl,” he shrugs. “She’s kinda boring. Lucky I found you.”
You awkwardly smile, knowing it’s not your place to reject him and make a scene. He looks to be the type who always gets his way and if he doesn’t this time, you’re afraid of how he might take it. 
You don’t budge and call for another flute of champagne instead, finishing it in one gulp that has the man releasing a deep breath in front of you.
“So you’ve been working for the Jeon’s for 8 years, you say?” He speaks again.
You nod, looking around to avoid his eyes.
“That’s quite a long time, yeah? I’m sure I can get you a spot at my company,” he brags. “I mean, we sell luxury cars. That’s way more interesting than buildings and shit.”
“I don’t drive,” you say too quickly. “I mean, I don’t know how to.”
“Perfect. I can teach you then,” he smirks. 
It’s the look that heightens your level of discomfort, and just as you’re about to make some excuse and run away, Jungkook calls your name that has you immediately turning towards him.
“Yes, Mr. Jeon?”
He’s not too far away; he comes closer yet still maintains a bit of a distance. 
“Hoseok’s asking for me but I want to speak to Mr. Saito before he leaves. Can you go to my cousin on my behalf?”
“Of course,” you say, excusing yourself and scurrying away from the scene, sighing in relief at the sight of a familiar pair of faces.
A-yeong gives you a hug and you return it, then you turn to Hoseok and ask what he needs Jungkook for.
“Nothing,” he says. “I didn’t call for him.”
“Oh, okay. Well, he said you did.”
“I haven’t spoken to him since we got here,” Hoseok replies. “You know how this gala goes. So many people to meet. Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, just… uh. Well, I just met Mr. Kwon’s son. And let’s just say, I don’t want that to happen again.”
“Oh, ___,” A-yeong sighs, knowing exactly what you mean. “Just stay with us. Or don’t leave Jungkook’s side.” Turning towards the man who’d just arrived, she adds, “stay close to her, okay?”
Jungkook looks at you, his eyes asking a question that you know the answer to but neither of you says anything. 
“I will,” he nods. 
Both of you stay where you are for a while before heading back to your seats for the sit-down dinner. You converse with those at your table, thankful that they’re all decent and entertaining. After that, Jungkook doesn’t leave your side. It almost seems like he’s your date rather than the other way around, but you appreciate his presence, especially when he calls your attention once you start looking uncomfortable.
“I’m sorry,” you sigh. “I just… I just get a little uneasy when people I don’t know get too close.”
“I understand. I’m the same,” he says, prompting you to look at him. “But I just feel uncomfortable, not unsafe. There’s a difference. And it’s not okay if that’s how they make you feel.”
He knew without you saying the words. It takes you back to that night at the restaurant with Hajoon and how Jungkook had looked the most guilty he’d ever been when you said that his staring made you feel uncomfortable. You supposed then that it was mostly because he thought he was causing a rift between you and Hajoon but you realize now that it was more than that. For all that Jungkook is, you’ve come to see that there are things he can’t stand himself doing; deliberately making you feel unsafe is definitely one of them. Perhaps it’s why at this moment, you feel the exact opposite being around him. 
And that’s how the rest of the night goes. He stays close but when he’s caught up in a conversation he can’t get out of, he gives you that look to remind you that it’s okay to step away, that you have the ability to remove yourself from a situation you don’t feel good being in. And you do, and the worry you used to have about being a mere assistant fades away. You never thought that one Jeon Jungkook would give you the permission to do that.
You’re seated on a chair some time later, the hours of walking in your high heels taking its toll on you. You wave to Hoseok and A-yeong, no longer having the energy to walk up to them for a proper goodbye. You sigh to yourself, feeling the tiredness slowly overtake you. It was still a good night, but it took a lot of energy from you, too. 
“Hey,” you hear Jungkook call out. 
You turn to him, still looking handsome as he stands nearby, his hands in his pockets as he mirrors your exhaustion.
“Ready to head home?” He asks.
“Yes,” you say too quickly, earning you a laugh. 
You stand up, limping only a tiny bit, but you think Jungkook notices, as he offers his arm just like he did at the start of the night.
“This is what a proper gentleman does, right?” He asks. 
“I suppose. Although I might say, Mr. Jeon, that’s what you were the entire time. So thank you.”
Jungkook nods in response, unsure how to receive your gratitude. He knows what you mean, as the first sign of your discomfort had him looking at you constantly. He was worried all night but he supposes there’s no reason to feel that way now, as your faint smile just signifies that you’re tired more than anything. 
For the short moment it takes for you to walk closer to him, he basks in your beauty once more. The night will be over soon, and he’s glad he could give you some reprieve this time. He tries not to lose it when you tighten your grip on his arm for support though, but that’s something he can think about later on. 
The walk to the car isn’t that long and you let go of him eventually. You head towards the other door then enter, the space in between reminding him of where you both belong - on either side of a line, one that he shouldn’t think of crossing.
You sink into your seat, fighting the urge to curl your body and take a nap, so you sit up straight and hold yourself together after once again feeling Jungkook’s arm under your touch. Most of the alcohol has left your system but perhaps not enough, as you boldly look at him and smile in appreciation. He returns it, perhaps knowing why you are.
You look out the window, appreciating Seoul’s night sky, until the vision starts getting unclear, as the rain falls steadily on the window. The tapping of the droplets on the glass is a sound you’ve come to appreciate, among other things that you used to be terrified of. 
There’s just this calmness, as if the rain is greeting you, accompanying you in your thoughts. But the sound of the radio getting louder disrupts that a little bit, and in looking at Mr. Ri in question only to find him glancing at the rearview mirror to see the man next to you, do you realize why he’s doing so.
Jungkook’s demeanor has changed, a complete 180 to how he looked not long ago when he seemed satisfied, fulfilled, almost proud of himself for surviving the night. He’s now cross-legged and cross-armed, with his eyes closed and jaws clenched, as if he’s trying to hold himself together. Or trying his best to drown out the sound of the rain, the way Mr. Ri is trying to do for him.
Your face falls at the sight. You’ve seen Jungkook stressed and angry and disappointed; you’ve seen him anxious, too, but this is different. There’s a bit of fear in there, and with the way he flinches and how he’s clutching onto his arms, you know this comes from somewhere and this was caused by something. If it’s anything similar to what you know, then this was because of something painful.
You want to reach out to him but you know you shouldn’t. You helplessly look back on the road then glance at Jungkook every few seconds as the rain continues. It doesn’t seem like it will be a terrible downpour but it’s stronger than usual. 
You try to remember instances in the past where he’d acted this way. A few come to mind, and you think now there’s a reason why he becomes uneasy when it starts to drizzle. That happened the other week while you were on a site visit with him for a small project, but you hadn’t thought much of it, given that he was on his fourth cup of coffee on the way there. 
But right now, you wish there was something more you could do; anything is better than nothing. But you feel constrained - by the distance, by your position, by his boundaries that seem to always be there.
By some miracle, the rain weakens, and it’s stopped by the time you arrive at Jungkook’s apartment building. The car halts and with him still in the same position, you think he probably doesn’t realize he’s home. 
“Mr. Jeon,” you say softly, gently tapping his arm to get his attention. “We’ve reached your place. And the rain has stopped. It’s… it’s okay to open your eyes now.”
It takes a few seconds but he takes a deep breath, opens his eyes, then looks around. It’s just droplets frozen in time on his window and he sighs in relief. Somehow the assurance that he’s okay means something to you this time; you hate to think of what burden he carries that he hides away.
He opens the door, and there’s a bit of disappointment you feel when he closes it and leaves without a goodbye. You suppose he just wants to get to his place immediately and rush to safety. But you don’t want to intrude, not if distance is what he needs, so  you settle with just watching him walk away. 
But then he turns around, and with that bit of boldness left in your body, you open the window and give him another smile. You wish he feels the tenderness in it; you wish somehow it’s enough to let him know that you understand, and that he’s not alone. 
“Good night,” you manage to say, and he hears it despite the distance.
“Good night, ___. And thank you.”
It’s the use of your name. It’s the softness of his smile and the words of gratitude. It’s the way he lingers as the car starts to drive away and you’re left watching him even from afar. 
It lets you know that he knows. And it’s the reason why you sleep soundly that night and why for the first time since you’ve met him, you can’t wait to see him again. 
Tumblr media
Series Masterlist
Permanent Taglist: @sherlynxx @di0rgguk @thequeen-kat @fan-ati--c @cravingforhotchocolate @adoraminie @helenazbmrskai @weasleyswizarding-wheezes @gukssunshine @kookxin @petuliii @yoursthv @libra04 @fancycollectormoon @twixxxpie @ignoretheskies @ohmydarlin-g @bids97 @minyoongiboongi @main-bangtansmauyeondan @bora-bae7 @investedreader @petalsofink @jvngkooker @stopeatread @craftymoonchaos @alpacaparkaseok @coletaehyung
Series Taglist: 
@xhazmania @ash07128 @rinkud @junniesoleilkth @junecat18 @peachytokki @baechugff @coralmusicblaze @jalexad @pamzn @hoseoksluv89 @familiarlikemymirror3 @kookies-n-spice @hyuneyeon @thisartemisnevermisses @jk97bam @nadzzzblog @xyarinx @megnugget98 @shameless-army @jkslvsnella @lvr2seok @nayashalouiseburrows @peterstarkchrishiddleston @kgneptun @cynicalbitch666 @roxexexee @llallaaa
1K notes · View notes
hotvintagepoll · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Propaganda
Ginger Rogers (Swing Time, Top Hat)—Look I’ll level with you, I’ve never seen her in a musical and I know that she’s an amazing dancer and she’ll be even hotter when I finally watch Top Hat but I’m not submitting her as a dancer I’m submitting her as an ACTRESS. Her comic timing is impeccable!!!!! She’s full to bursting with life and in every role she seems to be having FUN, you can practically feel the twinkle in her eye. With her natural warmth it’s like she’s letting you in on the joke, y’all get to have this fun together! Making me laugh is hot!!! [If you'd like to see Ginger dance, videos below the cut]
Dorothy Lamour (The Jungle Princess, Road to… movies)—Ok, to be honest, I get if no one wants to vote for her--she's kind of like my ~problematic fave~ because she started in the Road (Singapore, Bali, Hong Kong, etc) movies with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby, which are full of all sorts of exoticism tropes and usually have her playing very side-eye type roles..island princesses and things...yeah. also she banged J. Edgar Hoover. not very hot. but your honor i still think she's pretty despite all that she's pretty please look at her and tell me she's prettyyy
This is round 1 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Dorothy Lamour propaganda:
Tumblr media
She started in jungle and South Seas movies and became famous in the Road series. She learned quickly to improvise when facing Bob and Bing. Road to Bali almost has her character marrying both of theirs, since she's island royalty and nobody had a problem with it - a nearly poly relationship, an epiphany for a viewer who didn't even know that that could happen! She was a popular pinup girl during World War 2, and was the first singer for the popular standard "It Could Happen to You". She sang often in her movies and has a lovely voice!
Tumblr media
Ginger Rogers propaganda:
Tumblr media
She needs no introduction! An undeniable powerhouse on the dancefloor, and no less talented an actress. I once watched a compilation of cinema's greatest dance scenes and one of her and Fred Astaire's dances was featured, and one of the talking heads said he pitied her for 'having to keep up with him' - or something to that effect. Bullshit, I cry. Ginger Rogers was his absolute equal, and underplaying her incredible skill is downright criminal. I want the 'Cheek to Cheek' sequence from Top Hat to be permanently burned into my memory.
Tumblr media
"Backwards in high heels", as the saying goes (though the pedant in me must point out that she in fact spent her fair share of time leading or dancing side-by-side). One of the earliest twinkle-toed ladies of the silver screen, and in terms of acting/persona, her balance of wide-eyed cuteness and movie-star glamour has never quite been replicated.
Tumblr media
we all know her beloved string of musicals with fred but ginger also has an extensive and varied non-fred filmography that she's great in! a few ginger moments that are important 2 me personally ginger singing “we’re in the money” in gold diggers of 1933, complete with a verse in pig latin bc this whole movie is kinda mocking the concept of anyone actually being in the money in 1933; ginger and una merkel singing a verse of “shuffle off to buffalo” in 42nd street, providing some statler & waldorf-esque commentary on newlyweds from the upper berth of a railway car (interesting that belly was apparently a risque word in 1933 - maybe its bc the lyric is innuendo-ing about out of wedlock pregnancies - and that panties was a term for men’s underthings!); a favorite fred & ginger number
Tumblr media
Ginger Rogers could do everything! She could sing, dance and act. She was hilarious in comedies, moving in dramatic roles (she won an Oscar for Kitty Foyle in 1940) and absolutely gorgeous!
Listen, no shade to Fred Astaire at all, but she both kept up with him step for step and then later went on to WIN AN OSCAR FOR ACTING. (which he did not.) truly a double threat!!!
Tumblr media
One of the best dancers in Hollywood! Her work with Fred Astaire is just incredible.
ONE LINE: "Everything Fred did, Ginger did backwards and in heels" AND THEYRE RIGHT! Rogers was a total dance badass, and a lot of movie buffs know the story, but the Never Gonna Dance number from Swing Time took almost 50 takes, and allegedly by the end of filming it her white shoes had been stained pink because her feet were bleeding. As a note, she looks crazy gorgeous in this number. Watching these two dance is insane. They match up to each other in a way my mom describes as "divine" and she's right. DANCE NUMBERS!
youtube
Let's Call The Whole Thing Off (Shall We Dance, 1937, dancing starts at 3:14, they're in ROLLERSKATES)
youtube
(Ginger Rogers is the hottest woman ever to live in this number. seeing this as a teenager altered my brain chemistry)
youtube
(also watch her feet and how she moves opposite Astaire in this one. We all know our boy Freddie had that precision demon but jesus christ Miss Rogers, let a girl live!)
Pick Yourself Up, Swing Time 1936 (Everyone's seen this one but by god you are going to see it AGAIN!)
youtube
Shall We Dance, 1937 (duet begins at 2:34)
youtube
Smoke Gets In Your Eyes, Roberta 1935 (There's just something about Ginger Rogers in a slick black dress man)
youtube
The Continental, The Gay Divorcee 1934 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cjv6nmF7wdk God she's MAGIC in this one.
youtube
Gay Divorcee's Ending Montage 1934The infamous table and chairs spin happens at about 0:49. Pay CLOSE attention to her in this bc it looks like witchcraft and I feel lightheaded whenever I watch this movie bc shes THAT awesome.
youtube
She is a miracle to watch. Sorry for the sheer amount of clips. My entire family is like madly in love with Ginger Rogers.
419 notes · View notes
respectthepetty · 4 months
Text
Pride Petty Watch
Long story short, I owe the BL gods, so I'll be watching TWO series from my Petty List during the month of June. This list includes shows I haven't watched for purely petty reasons, so I'm asking the crowd to pick the two shows I will watch from all the MAME series, some censored Chinese bromances, a few sexual tension-filled Korean bromances, and one wild card.
I'm making my first ever poll, so whichever two series get the highest numbers will be the two I watch. And for all the kind people in the crowd, this is not the time to think about me. Pick your favorite. And for all the people who I annoy on the daily with my wild ass takes that piss you off, pick TharnType. But there is a possibility of a secret thirteenth option that would hurt me much worse . . .
The petty ass reasons are below the poll.
Disclaimer: If you're going to read the petty ass reasons, I need you to understand these are PETTY ASS REASONS, so don't try to hit me with 2,000 words about why me not watching censored bromances is a problem or why me not liking your fave hurts your feelings. Nah. Pick a show!
MAME
Tumblr media
Love By Chance
This show came out at the end of 2018, and I watched the first episode, maybe first two, and thought it was boring. Then, in 2019, I saw a GIF of the locker scene, so I recommitted. I made it past the first episode just when the PerthSaint drama started spilling out everywhere, so I chucked the deuces and haven't returned since.
Tumblr media
TharnType
For some reason, I couldn't find the first episode when it aired. Then, I found out how the first episode ended. Then, I found out about Type's past. Then, I just kept finding out more awful stuff until eventually the MewGulf shit finally hit the fan, and I was still reeling from the PerthSaint drama (and the emerging ZeeSaint chaos). At this point, I've built this show up so much that I'm afraid to see what it is actually about.
Tumblr media
Don't Say No
A story of another GIF of a locker room scene sucking me in! After the first two MAME pairs blew up, I believed her shows were cursed, so I opted out of watching this one even though I thought it would be the one to vibe with me the most. But the biggest reason was because the main characters came from TharnType, so I felt like I would have to watch TharnType to understand this show, which was a big hell nah.
Tumblr media
Love in the Air
I watched this through mutuals on my dash, so I feel like I did watch it. It is also the highest rated MAME series, so I had faith in it. However, when I found out about Sky's past, TharnType's ghost popped back up, and I realized this demon of a show is gonna haunt me in every MAME series.
Tumblr media
The Wedding Plan
Y'all hated one of the leads so much while it was airing that I now hate him, and I don't think I can let that go, so I'm coming in with pre-hate and TharnType's ghost, but on top of that, some of y'all said it was boring. But what is boring in a MAME series? Consent? Not kidnapping someone? I never got answers, so I'm very conflicted about this show.
Censored Chinese
Tumblr media
The Untamed
It's color coded, but FIFTY FUCKING EPISODES! What is this shit? Grey's Anatomy? The fuck! Second, once China pulled Addicted, I was holding grudges for life because it crossed from entertainment censorship into real-world oppression, so I could not bring myself to support media from a country that openly discriminates against the queers when I live in America where our highest court is just one Supreme Court Justice away from making us all live in the damn Mojo Dojo Casa House.
Tumblr media
Word of Honor
It's color coded, but THIRTY-SIX FUCKING EPISODES! What is this shit? Supernatural?! The fuck! Second, I don't know the difference between this and The Untamed. Both are color-coded, one of them has a lot of uncles (?), one of them has awful facial hair, and they all have pretty outfits. Every time someone makes a reference about these shows, I just nod the same way I do when people mention Star Wars because none of it makes sense.
Tumblr media
Guardian
I spent two years believing Killer and Healer was Guardian. I haven't watched either, but I thought they were the same show. Honestly, if this show wins, I might just watch Killer and Healer because I will forget they are not the same show. Don't they both solve cases? And because it's China, past lives must be involved, no? I'm looking at their MDLs as I write this, and I'm still not convinced they are different.
Tumblr media
Stay with Me
It's color coded, but I know how it ends, and word on the street is that IS the ending since a second season seems unlikely. China couldn't just let me be hurt over Addicted, the original. No. Gotta hurt me again with Addicted, the remake. Rude af.
Tumblr media
The Spirealm
First off, SEVENTY-EIGHT FUCKING EPISODES! What is this shit? Law & Order: SVU?! The fuck! I know how this ends, and it ain't happy! I don't care how people are trying to spin it, so to sit through SEVENTY-EIGHT DAMN EPISODES just for that ending already has me irate. And don't try telling me Viki combined episodes so it's only thirty-four. That's still a lot. However, everybody who has watched it says it's phenomenal, so is the pain worth it or are these people all lying so they convince themselves it was worth it?
Korean Bromance
Tumblr media
Beyond Evil
With most Korean dramas, I feel like I missing something important. Like some part of the story does not click with me and I stay lost for the rest of the show. I suck it up for the queers, but the not-queers-but-it-is-queer shows . . . nah, and especially one about cops . . . (-_-). Also, The Worst of Evil just showed, and it was another reminder that I need these cops to quit their jobs and just screw each other. Embrace "Be Gay. Do Crime"
Tumblr media
The Devil Judge
I know enough about Kpop to know GOT7 would not let one of its members kiss a man in this show. I looked at those GIFs of Jeff Satur and Jackson Wang on their show knowing damn well that if Wang got too close to Satur, an entire management team would have ascended from hell and kidnapped both of them, so the promo for this show was so wild because it felt queerbait-adjacent, and I was salty about it.
WILD CARD!
This option will be automatically unlocked IF this stupid little poll gets 216 votes, so I have high hopes this will not happen since I ain't that popular and I hate this wild card which is . . .
Tumblr media
SOTUS
This show is my original TharnType. It came out in 2016. I watched it live. I watched the sequel. I remember neither. New was in it? Off was in it?! WHAT?! I have no memory of this show except Krist wiping his mouth, and I have carried that with me for eight damn years. I loved Be My Favorite, so I thought I moved past whatever strange grudge I was holding against this man who doesn't know I exist nor care, but then I saw that trailer for The Ex-Morning, and unlike Elsa, I can't let this shit go, so I'm willing to play Jumanji and go back into the jungle to finish this once and all.
So what it's gonna be, mi gente. Which demons am I facing for Pride and what shows do I get to stay petty about? Help me decide!
184 notes · View notes
multifandom--mess · 6 months
Text
Hannigram Fic Recs! pt.2
Here it is, the big fat fic recs post I've been putting off for like two months but at least that means I had time to read a shit ton of fics. I made sure to do a mix of short and long fics this time around since the first part were all long ones. Enjoy!
part 1
》 The Lamb and His Monster by petrodactyl352 (Explicit)(104k)
Will has always been drawn to the macabre. The proverbial flame upon which he has burnt his fragile moth’s wings time and time again, it’s why he had fallen in love with Florence and why he alone seems to see the beauty in the grisly but exquisite work of Il Mostro. But when he meets a young man in the Uffizi Gallery whose sketchbook is filled with nothing but page upon page of intricate renditions of the Primavera drawn in reverent strokes of pencil, he realizes he may not be alone in his fascination with the Monster. As they lift veils and scale forts and slowly begin to understand each other, Will gets a taste of exactly how bright the cinders of intrigue can burn—and how quickly they can kindle into an inferno of obsession.
(Young hannigram in Florence ahhh this is seriously one of the best fics i've ever read it had to be at the top of the list)
》 Spectral Hearts by mattHughdancy (Explicit) (16k)
Will has a meltdown at a crime scene. Guess who’s called in to help.
(Another top fave of mine they are so fucking cute in this fic 🤧 features autistic Will, and Hannibal just loves him so much oh my goddd my heart exploded reading this)
》 lay like a flood spills away by bleakmidwinter (Explicit)(35k)
Will Graham meets Hannibal, a frequent cruiser, at an open-minded nudist lake. Despite his reservations, Will is drawn to him, but is eventually forced to question his mysterious nature when the lakeside regulars start to go missing.
(I loved this one bc what better setting than a nudist lake. This is just gay as hell honestly lmao bc the lake is all dudes and Will is "straight" at the beginning until he meets Hannibal and it's all downhill from there. Definitely give this one a read it had some hilarious moments too)
》 Doing Things That Friends Don't Do by HigherMagic (Explicit) (39k)
A year after the fall, Will and Hannibal have settled into a fairly blissful, domestic harmony. But Will's imagination has never let him simply enjoy what he has - why should it start now?
(Basically Will trying everything in his power NOT to have sex with Hannibal but of course we all know he can't keep it together. They are so horny for each other in this i died laughing so many times. Also this author is such an amazing writer expect multiple recs from them in this post)
》 Railroad Romance by OneWhoSitsWithTurtles (12k)(Explicit)
Hannibal is still Hannibal, and Will is still Will. Except Will is not part of the FBI and they meet on a two day train trip from New Orleans to Baltimore.
(A strangers to lovers meet-cute on a train. Lots of fluffy moments and of course train sex ensues)
》 Three Stars by beforethedawn (94k)(Explicit)
Three months after the fall, Jack finally tracks them down in Canada and Will and Hannibal have to make a run for it, slumming it through America in three star hotels and eating sub par food.
(Hannigram roadtrip!! This fic was so fun I loved it. They take on the identities of some familiar Mads and Hugh characters ;)
》 Unexpected Delight by HigherMagic (Explicit) (61k)
Will has a kink that he’s deeply ashamed of. Unbeknownst to him, Hannibal has the same or a similar/compatible kink. They get together, and Will is going out of his way as he usually does to seem like his sexual tastes are as “normal” as possible. As a result, Hannibal gets the idea that Will is super vanilla and maybe a little prudish, and not wanting to scare him off, is also keeping his kinky side on the DL. This goes on for while, with them each trying super hard to hide how kinky they are and act as “vanilla” as possible, to hilarious results, all while privately thinking the other one would be super freaked out if they knew since they’re obviously so sweet and normal.
(This whole thing is literally ALL smut 😭😭 but Han and Will love each other to death and the sex is so good y'all omg I had to stop reading multiple times to catch my breath)
》 The Substitute by Devereauxs_Disease (Explicit) (10k)
When Hannibal tells Will he's sick, Will is skeptical. Before he knows it, he's laying in a hospital bed and being told he's going nowhere for two weeks. Will is distraught until Hannibal swoops in and offers to take over Will's courses at the FBI Academy. Will doesn't mind Hannibal showing up every night with a home-cooked meal, but he might just resent Hannibal becoming the most popular teacher at the Academy in just two weeks...
(A seaon 1 au if Hannibal wasn't an asshole had told Will about the encephalitis. This is hilarious tho because the students don't like Will no more when he comes back and they keep asking about Hannibal 😭😭 poor Will lmaoo)
》 When This Old Tired Body Wants to Sing by KareliaSweet (Explicit) (7k)
“Fuck me quicker, darling,” he purrs with liquid insincerity, “God forbid you see my face.” Will never touches him unless it is in the dark. In the daylight he is a ghost.
(Will being an asshole and only fucking Hannibal in the dark ugh 🙄 but things work out eventually so don't worry!)
》 Maybe Tomorrow by Shotgun_sinner (Explicit) (26k)
After recovering from their tumble off a cliff, Will agrees to get Hannibal to Portugal, where the good doctor can start a new life for himself. In exchange, Will can take the boat and return to his life, or start over himself. A storm hits on the open water, leaving them stranded somewhere in the Azores. With no one else on the small island, they're forced to work together for survival, and work through their violent past in order to get along.
(A survival au! I LOVED this and author is another fave of mine. I go crazy for a good stranded on a deserted island trope and this did not disappoint. Also there is an insanely funny part where I absolutely DIED. You'll know when you read it 💀💀)
》 I've Always Been A Daughter by air_of_the_Waterfall (44k)(Explicit)
It's been a month since Will and Abigail ran away with Hannibal. Living in a safe Canadian town, Will and Hannibal are free to explore their newfound intimacy and Abigail has a chance at the future she craves. However, upon meeting Hannibal’s sister Mischa and her daughter, loyalties are tested and insecurities run rampant. The Lecters have an undeniably dark past, and as Abigail and Will fall deeper into its truths, Hannibal’s manipulation and misguided love come to light more clearly than ever before.
(This fic is truly a hidden gem I am so glad I found it. Murder family post-mizumono and also MISCHA LIVES. The plot is so well written and I love Mischa's characterization. Definitely give this one a read, yall it is SO GOOD it deserves so much love)
》 Home is Not a Place by Shotgun_Sinner (11k)(Explicit)
Post-Fall, Hannibal recovers from his injuries. Will takes care of him, and their relationship evolves much more easily than Hannibal thought it would. The only issue is that Will is a constant presence, and he hasn't had alone time in three years. It ends up not being an issue at all.
(This one is so sweet. Basically Hannibal wants to jerk off but he can't because Will is just always there and he hardly gets a moment alone and he'll feel bad for telling him to go away 😭😭 but they finally get together in the end
》 Held in the Highest Regard by HigherMagic (12k)(Explicit)
What happens when a group of serial killers pick the absolute worst targets? Will is already having a pretty rough night, since Hannibal proposed to him and Will said 'No' for reasons he still hasn't quite figured out yet. It's not their fault - they couldn't have known - but sometimes people have to learn lessons the hard way, and Will could definitely use some stress relief.
(If you are familiar with the movie 'The Strangers' then you'll really like this one. I reread it like three times it was so good. Shit had me tweaking omg this is like the perfect au for them)
》 Green-Eyed Monster by CestPasDuBaudelaire (53k)(Explicit)
Will and Hannibal have settled in Cuba and, for the past year, they have been living their happily ever after in a small hidden community for retired wanted criminals. However, at the hazard of a gathering, Will is faced with an unbelievable fact, other members of the community may also fancy his monster of a husband. Then comes Will's spiraling, as he learns to come to terms with a disastrous, chaotic and slowly overwhelming possessiveness. And of course, feelings are never easy to deal with, when Hannibal is involved. A smut character study in three acts exploring Will's possessiveness.
(Top!Will my beloved. Don't let the title fool you, this was so fun to read and I love the community for wanted criminals idea. And possessive Will is always a treat ;)
》 Haunted by Anonymous (165k)(Explicit)
Still recovering from their fight with Dolarhyde, Will and Hannibal escape to New Orleans with Chiyoh's help. But Will is still struggling to accept Hannibal and his own darkness, something that Hannibal has every intention of helping him overcome...
(And finally I leave you guys with this monster of a fic. So sad that the author chose to go anon but if they somehow see this I hope they know how much I love this story. Will is struggling and Hannibal is an asshole at certain points but when is he not? Lots of references to Will's past too and some stuff about his mom that's very interesting)
I hope you guys enjoy these stories as much as I did. If you read any and want to discuss my messages and ask box are always open! ♡♡♡
249 notes · View notes
Note
hi! i recently subscribed to the pateron, and im a little intimidated by all of the extra content available, lol. in your opinion, what are some of the funniest short rest / dungeon court / mixed bag episodes to start with? (if anyone else also has their fave eps to share please do)
oh wonderful! welcome to the best stupid show(s) money can buy.
i’m gonna operate under the assumption you’re caught up on main feed eps but if i suggest a short rest for an episode you haven’t listened to, definitely hit the episode first.
these are just off the top of my head with ones i can remember what they are, i may come up with more later lol
short rests:
i think short rests 99 and 100 should actually be required listening for everyone, they’re fucking earth shattering. start there.
the one for 70 is stupid and reveals how they almost lost the episode so that’s a good one.
c3e22 has one of the most insane short rests in retrospect. and c3e41 also has a bonkers short rest. they talk about santa manscaping in your bathroom. the episode came out in august. i wept.
c2e41’s campaign wrap up short rest also is a good time and gives good insights on the campaign.
the short rest for the can they kill it is the origin of crabster. 77 has a rose before noon. 91 ends with jake saying something so insane it ruins me.
the short rest for caldwells frooze your own adventure also slaps. the wilson brothers are there.
the brussels hookup is another 8bbc short rest that’s so dumb and beautiful.
c3e54 has them all hyped up on too much caffeine after a mixed bag and talking about jumping off decks onto frozen lakes and landing on one boob and one butt cheek. i wish i was kidding. it’s incredible.
dungeon courts:
i’m mostly gonna highlight patreon dungeon courts with the assumption you’ve listened to the corresponding main feed eps.
king robert can klump ft. ally beardsley. the flintstones costume fun around the house. you don’t know what that means but it’s. something.
a little place called mangia’s. murph breaks down. caldwell loses it. jake turns to google.
yuncle ft. jasper william cartwright. rats ride loose and your yuncle is power hungry.
the video dungeon courts are great, you can see murph lose it.
bird jail ft. zac oyama. actually anything with zac oyama. it’s great.
table rattlers ft. jeremy cobb. i don’t remember what happens exactly but it’s great.
the dm’s judge ft. lou wilson and zac oyama. absolutely iconic bench on this one.
mixed bags:
mixed bag tier my beloved!! so many are so good!
the whole blazing babe chronicles. not enough people know there was a second hot boy summer campaign that’s available on the mixed bag. caldwell spills half a corona on his character sheet. it’s a dry july and the boys are Not on the same page about it. love is love is love returns.
the biggest loreser is new but damn if it isn’t impeccable. warning: the fred flintstone noise is fucking LOUD
all the taste tests (energy drinks, m&ms, and gamer energy drinks). jake tries an expired products. jake later forgets to buy peanut m&ms while emily decides she can taste what color an m&m is. murph gets hyped on caffeine and has to take a break resulting in one of the most insane short rests to date. listen to the short rest first, it’s funnier that way.
if you can listen to live shows, (the sound is sometimes challenging) i recommend those. great starting point is the melbourne one from last year, i laughed so much the first time i heard it. “i was a lurking actor. that’s a union job!” also the boston dungeon court did hit the main feed but started as a mixed bag and i was there so i want to shout it out.
emily’s winter solstice one shot!! brennan and siobhan are there and it’s creepy and truly so fun.
both dungeons and dragons movies. jake and emily gaslight murph. they talk about a truly terrible set of films. there’s someone called grape lady that is a highlight.
both spilltaculars. at times a bit cringe, but it’s fun to hear other people’s failures sometimes because then you feel better about yourself. plus they make up a judgement scale that is different every time.
spellcheck! the game show that’s kinda sweeping the nation. or was. it’s fun.
that’s long (oops) and all i can think of off the top of my head. if people have other faves, share them for new patreon people!
also, my last bit of advice is to join the streams if you can. jake’s stream is for the short rest tier and above and caldwells is for the mixed bag tier and above. they’re wild. we had caldwell drawing everyone in crocs for like 6 months (it’s arguably why we’re getting the jibbitz). sometimes you get tucker lore. (tucker, the fictional man jake’s wife is cucking him with.) they’re grand.
81 notes · View notes
sharkboywrites · 8 months
Note
BG3 gang with a reader who fucking hates wearing shoes for sensory reasons and just wanders around barefoot (even when they really should have shoes on)?
Bg3 Characters With an Autistic S/O That Hates Wearing Shoes
A/N: ohh boy this one’s exciting to write because when I was younger I hated shoes and refused to wear them. We were recently going through old photos and I’m literally never wearing shoes in any of the photos. This didn’t specify which characters to use so I kinda just did my faves.
Autistic reader, gn reader
Tumblr media
Astarion
- He definitely judges you at first
- I mean how could he not?
- He made off handed comments about it, how odd it was you never wore shoes
- He wondered for a bit if you were a nature crazy person that never wore shoes for “being closer to nature” or something like that
- It took him a while to actually ask why you never wore anything
- Once you told him, it finally made sense
- He ends up feeling kind of bad for making fun of you
- He didn’t know there was such an intense reason to make you not want to wear shoes
- It wasn’t something he ever considered
- Afterwards, he defends you, making statements to how shoes aren’t exactly needed and you’re paving the way for your own sense of comfort
Gale
- To be honest, Gale didn’t even notice at first
- He was more preoccupied with his own situation, being a ticking time bomb after all
- It wasn’t until you all had started to go into public places that he actually took notice
- He was never mean about it but also never really asked why you did this
- He’d gently try to convince you to wear some shoes, but backed down once you were firm about not putting any on
- It was only after you were refused service at a restaurant, opting to sit outside instead while the read rod your party ate, he decided to ask you why you were so against it
- Hearing your reasoning made plenty of sense to him
- He understood why you would want to subject yourself to what’s basically torture for you
- He’s very supportive of you, insisting to anyone who makes a comment that you comfort is more important
- Who knows, he might even make a little illusion spell to help you out
Halsin
- If anyone’s going to understand any reason for not wanting to wear shoes, it’s Halsin
- He understands every reason for not wanting to wear shoes
- He personally saw it as a connection to nature (re: astarion’s part)
- He always defends you, even though he doesn’t exactly have an explanation for your behavior
- He wants you to feel comfortable, even if it’s something he doesn’t understand
- It’s probably mentioned in passing that you explain it to him
- Once again, he doesn’t judge you and defends you
- He sees your comfort as the most important factor
- Halsin has met a lot of people, and your not the first autistic person with odd habits he’s ever seen
- Basically, Halsin does not judge you, you’re own quirks make you yourself, and that and your comfort is the most important thing
Tumblr media
Trying to grind out some requests today, bear with me 🙏 also the top girls is from my favorite movie and I’m needing out (When Marnie Was There) ty for reading and have a nice day :)
148 notes · View notes
cococassey · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
Ironically, after taking me out of years of kdrama slump, Lovely Runner is going to leave me with a worse slump sniff. This might even surpass any romance kdrama I've watched before as it's focused on the romance first and it didn't go off the rails on the 2nd half. Ryu Sun Jae, pls take responsibility, chuseyo.
Guys I'm still so not over it. As part of "Kidnap Sun Jae and Run" Addicts Anonymous, let me help you cope through this 10 step program:
1. Play OST nonstop
"I Think I Did" and "Sonaki" will definitely be 'memories embedded in my soul' for playing the OST nonstop from when I wake up until I sleep.
It's going to be a tragedy if Byeon Woo Seok doesn't sing any of these live on his upcoming fanmeets. Pls pls pls k-ent gods.
2. Rewatch from the start
Undoubtedly one of my comfort watches from now on. I knew it was going to be good when near end of ep 1, Younha's iconic "Umbrella" song started playing, Sun Jae was walking towards a crying Sol, held the blue umbrella to shield her while he's getting rained on. Aww. I'm so soft for these scenes. (Deja vu to Bogum's MDBC anyone?)
3. If time is limited, watch the last 10 mins of every ep where writer-nim always saves the fireworks till the end!
In ep 2, the OG "I Think I Did" started playing, where a smiling Sol held the yellow umbrella to Sun Jae, and he hopelessly fell for her, is now going down as one of the most iconic scenes in kdrama romance. I'm usually not a fan of instacrush. But their relationship naturally developed more when they got close, during that stretch of Sun Jae's swimming injury plot.
4. For masochists like me, rewatch all the times Sol rejects Sun Jae. Ugh it hurts, but it hurts so good. A lot of rejections, but these 2 scenes...
In ep 9, when college Sol drunkenly curses Sun Jae as "pabo" for always going back to her, when she just keeps on hurting him. But he can't help himself. Sniff.
In ep 12, the setup before that train scene, where Sol asks Sun Jae not to cry when she leaves him to go back to the future. Then cut to next day on the train when she tricks Sun Jae and leaves him alone on the train, and of course Sun Jae can't keep his promise and his tears fall. Simply drama magic.
5. Rewatch the kissing scenes!
Sadly, nothing quite matched that ep 8, very hooot kiss between the 2 now adult Sun Jae and Sol. Sol discovers Sun Jae still pines for her all these years, and Sol finally admitting to him about her true feelings, the pent up feelings for 15 years in that kiss...,whew (fans self)!
6. Rewatch all my fave scenes!
That cherry blossom proposal scene is one of the most beautifully shot ones I've ever seen, glad he axed the first one lol. And a picture of the future wedding scene though imaginary for now! It's our reward for suffering for 15 eps lol.
7. Read and like all LR related posts, bts, stills, fanart.
You know it's a hit when fanart is everywhere, and I can change to a new Sun Jae-Sol wallpaper everyday and bask on the gorgeousness of BWS .
By the way, that latest clip of the live watch with the cast and where BWS is crying in gratitude sniff. He knows his life is also changed forever by this drama. Deserving! I was always intrigued by BWS's looks before, and he really surprised me with his acting, he also has great comedic timing!
It's just rare nowadays that the drama has the whole package, I love the cast and their characters too.
8. Read and like all posts related to BWS and KHY, and the cast.
Kim Hye Yoon poured her heart out on this drama, she really carried it.
I didn't get to talk about the rest of the cast yet. At first, I was getting used to some of the 'over the top' comedy, but by that condom confusion scene, I was laughing too. I love that all of the cast is just going for it even if it's bonkers crazy. But my fave has to be adult celeb Sun Jae's assistant who has this hilarious deadpan face and delivery of lines, and always has that 'tsk tsk what a loser' look of scorn towards Sun Jae, when his boss is at his most embarassing lovesick self mwahah.
9. Recommend LR to every unsuspecting person, let's spread the addiction, and destroy their lives too lol!
10. If still not recovered, go back to step 1! Good luck!
56 notes · View notes
hamsterclaw · 1 year
Text
Fic Library: Namjoon
A list of incredible fics I've read and re-blogged on my (almost) 2 years on here. These stories all celebrate our fave big, brainy, clumsy, sometimes annoying, always sexy Joon, check them out and give these authors some love!
Tumblr media
The Body Through Time by @yeoldontknow. KNJ x f! reader, sexy academia AU. Angsty fic with Namjoon as a smouldering brainiac.
Goodnight Nabi by @sahmfanficbts. Get used to seeing Sam's handle in my lists because she's one of my fave writers and a lovely person to boot. KNJ x f! reader, sexy DILF mechanic Namjoon. A sexy, beautiful fic with Sam's signature hope and heart.
Pronoia by @junghelioseok. KNJ x reader, college + zombie apocalypse AU. A cracky, funny, zingy story with guest appearances from other members - including JK and Yoongi.
Booty Jorts by @miscelunaaa, who also has a good showing in my fic recs for her top notch writing and just being a great human. KNJ x f! reader - this is a smuttily delicious gem.
Shell-ter by @miscelunaaa. Hermit crab! Namjoon x marine biologist reader. I genuinely think about this grumpy (crabby?!) Namjoon all the time.
Scent of a woman by @sahmfanficbts. Leopard hybrid parfumerie boss! Namjoon x employee f! reader. There's always so much humanity in Sam's stories, and this does not disappoint.
How I love you by @ahundredtimesover. KNJ x f! reader. A 28k beautiful musing on love and marriage that's thought-provoking and sensitively written.
Seoul Redemption by @sahmfanficbts. Forger! KNJ x single mom! reader. A gorgeously realised imagining with a noir vibe and very human characters.
Park and Ride (Explicit) by @here2bbtstrash. KNJ x reader, idolverse. The first story I read by M, and it made me want to read so much more of her work. Sexy, fast-paced, and this Namjoon is swoonworthy.
Holding on letting go by @augustbutwinter. KNJ x gn! reader. August is queen of the short impactful drabble but her longer pieces are just as incredible. A sad, angsty, truthful, beautifully realised gem.
Cuffing Szn by @miscelunaaa. FBI agent KNJ x soft-bodied/plus-sized reader. Joon's an FBI agent, he's big and sexy, do you really need to know any more?
Reckless by @vyduan. Part of the Her multiverse. KNJ x reader, also featuring JJK x reader, idolverse. I started reading vyduan's writing when I first got into BTS fanfic, and apart from being a fucking fantastic writer, she's also an all-round good egg with a razor sharp wit. Reckless is hot and sexy and reader is gritty, strong and kickass. Namjoon is the arrogant pompous asshole of my dreams in this.
Fall apart & redefine by @ugh-yoongi. Idol KNJ x f! reader. Namjoon's music and musings give off sadboi vibes to me, and this gorgeous, angsty story captures all of that. Stunning.
On the line 1 by @augustbutwinter. KNJ x reader. I was only speaking the truth when I said August writes drabbles like no other. Short, cute and impactful.
Hey, it's me by @yoongiphoria. Exes Namjoon x reader. I remember reading this for the first time around the time Indigo came out and thinking how perfectly it captured the vibe of the album. I still love it now.
Untitled by @ahundredtimesover. An idolverse AU ft KNJ and f! reader. Musings on loss and impermanence and legacies also inspired by Indigo.
If this is all we can do by @yoongiphoria. A follow up to Hey, it's me, linked above, that made me stop skim reading and pay attention. Angsty, full of longing and just a great read.
The package thief by @blog-name-idk. KNJ x f! reader, enemies to lovers. I'm a fan of Mango's cracky humour, and it comes through in this judgy, petty and somehow also endearing Namjoon.
Shut up! by @daechwitatamic. KNJ x gn reader. I love it when a story alludes to Namjoon being annoying and I especially like how reader shuts him up. Smutty, sexy and so so good.
Envy by @whatifyoulivelikethat. KNJ x f! reader. Love this author's general DGAF vibes, and they've also written some of my favourite stories. Namjoon's gorgeously written and darkly sexy in this. So so hot.
The one with Namjoon and the u-haul by @eoieopda. KNJ x Jeon! reader. Jade's writing is sharply hilarious and this is a perfect example. A dreamy, sexy Namjoon and a lil shit JK.
Pheromones by @rmnamjoons. Spaceship captain Joon x spaceship botanist reader, sci-fi AU. The fic that introduced me to the concept of sex pollen and a sexy, sex-crazed yet somehow still chivalrous Namjoon.
Promise Me KNJ x f! reader, JJK x f! reader, military AU, by @sahmfanficbts. A beautifully written, tender love story that made me cry and reflect on my life. Sam writes emotions like no one else.
Additional notes: A few of my favourite Namjoon stories, are only on AO3, for which I've created a separate post.
319 notes · View notes
mrsevans90 · 8 months
Text
Puppy Love
Captain Syverson x OFC Emma Miller Part 10
Tumblr media
Summary: Austin Syverson has returned to Texas after retiring from the military and starts his own contracting business. Syverson is used to being alone and thinks he prefers it that way. While at work he stumbles upon an injured and abused puppy. When he meets the new veterinarian in town, Emma Miller, he is immediately smitten with her. It turns out Emma has some baggage of her own. Will they be able to make it work? Or is it just a case of fleeting puppy love?
Pairing: Henry Cavill as Captain Austin Syverson x OFC Emma Miller 
Warnings: smut (oral/m receiving), talks of period intercourse, detailed PTSD flashback, graphic death of character discussed, self-deprecating talk, language
MINORS DNI! Must be 18+
I do not authorize any copying/pasting, stealing of my work, or using my words as your own. 
This story is not beta’d. All mistakes are my own.
A/N: I am an imperfect person who makes mistakes. All that I ask is to please be kind and if you enjoy it then please comment and REPOST! I appreciate any love, comments, and reposts more than you could know. Thank you for reading! 
Author's Note: This is a heavy chapter--- Big time PTSD flashback so consider yourself warned! Also, I purposely chose to not use characters in the flashback from the movie Sand Castle. I just didn’t want to kill off anyone’s fave character, so we are going to pretend this flashback was another mission from another deployment right before Sy retired not related to the movie. It was just easier for my conscious to write it that way. 
Part 9
All night long I have nightmares about the war. I wake and try to reset myself like the therapist taught me with deep breathing, water, change of environment, etc.; but nothing is working. I maybe only get about 2 hours of sleep total and I’m exhausted. I still go on my run to try and exhaust myself even more so that maybe tonight I will pass out into a dreamless sleep. I try to fake enthusiasm for whatever Nana is rambling on about in her phone call to me on the way to work but I’m sure she can tell that I’m starting to spiral. Alex can tell that today is one of those days so he asks me if I’m good and when I grunt at him he keeps his distance. God, I’m an ass but I’m obviously not good and I just can’t talk to him about it. Nobody really understands except the boys that I was with when it happened and several of them are dead now. I’m supposed to be their leader and I feel like I should have my shit together. My nightmares continue to worsen throughout the week and I feel like I overcompensate by working harder or exerting myself in more difficult physical pursuits in hopes of tiring my body and my brain out. I forced myself to run four additional miles on Friday even though my leg quickly protested. I focused on pushing through the pain and ended up having to ice my leg after work.
Friday evening finally rolls around, and Emma shows up at the house as planned with a little overnight bag in tow and homemade banana pudding. I’m cooking us some chicken and veggies out back on the grill when she arrives and I feel like I calm a bit just being in her presence. She still looks absolutely adorable as she shows up wearing comfortable clothes-a tank top and soft shorts. I love that she’s feeling relaxed enough with me to just be her most authentic self. After we eat, I fill my belly up with her decadent dessert and I swear I see stars. She’s quite the chef; as if she needed any more of a direct line to my belly or my heart. Assuming she’s still on her period, I ask her if she’s feeling alright and she nods but doesn’t offer more. I suggest we get in bed and watch a movie and she gleefully agreed. We get all cozied up in bed and she chooses a rom-com to put on. Not my first choice, but I’ll do anything to make her smile like that. It’s nice having someone other than myself warm my bed. We fall asleep easily tangled in each other and I’m relieved that I have no nightmares. Maybe Emma is the cure to my nightmares? Or did I really succeed in tiring myself out enough that I slept too hard to dream. Either way, I’m not complaining.
Saturday morning. I wake up at my usual time and smile to myself at finally getting a decent night of sleep. I lay in bed watching my girl dream before I decide to get up and go for a run. If it’s the exercise that helped me sleep last night, I’m not going to miss the opportunity to do it again. I leave a little note on Emma’s nightstand and decide to only run two miles today so I don’t fuck up my leg more than I probably already have. When I get back home, Emma is still a mess of hair and sheets and I can tell that she never missed me. Her hair is halfway across her face, one of her breasts is almost spilling out of her twisted tank top, and the covers are tangled all in her legs which brings a smile to my face. For someone so effortlessly beautiful, she’s kind of a mess when she sleeps and I can’t help but find that to be one of the most endearing things ever. I attempt to take a quick shower and am surprised when ice cold hands wrap around my stomach as my eyes are closed under the spray of the water and I jump like a cat. 
“Damn woman! Your hands are ice cubes.” I say as she laughs uncontrollably.
“Sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to startle you.” She says as she hugs me from behind. 
“I woke up and heard the shower running so I figured you wouldn’t mind if I joined you.” 
“Always, join me Sugar. My favorite showers are the ones with you.” I tell her as I turn around to see her. She’s got her beautiful hair tied up in a bun on top of her head and I shift her so that the water runs down her body to warm her up. I spy her adjust the temperature higher and I can’t help myself.
“What is it with women taking showers equivalent to the heat of lava?” She smiles.
“We are colder than you are. Gotta warm up somehow.” She presses a sweet kiss to my lips before turning around and washing her body. I can’t help but stand there like a creep watching her but I’ll never turn down an opportunity to see her wet and soapy.
“I hope you don’t mind that I hijacked your shower.” She smiled sweetly.
“Darlin’, I was done anyway. Now I’m just here for the show.” I arch my eyebrow at her as she spies my obvious erection.
“Let me help you.” She seductively suggests.
“I can help us both.” I offer but she shakes her head.
“Still on my period.” She replies without making eye contact.
“So?”
“We can’t have sex when I’m on my period!” She looks completely shocked.
“Says who? You know, sex actually helps relieves cramps.”  
“But..I might get blood on your…”
“Dick? What’s your point?”
“Isn’t that gross?” 
“Sugar, I told ya, I’m a man. A little blood isn’t going to scare me off. Now if you’re not interested because you don’t feel well or you just don’t want too, I have no problem with that. But, if you’re not interested because you think I’m going to be grossed out or something, I promise I won’t be. You can have me anytime you want, Sweetness. There’s no pressure either way. If you’re uncomfortable with it, I won’t mention it again.”
“Maybe give me some time to come around to the idea of it. I’ve never really considered it as an option.”
“Sure thing, babygirl.”
“You are something else, Bear. You mean it when you said I can have you anytime I want?”
“Mmhmm.” I say as her fingertips trail down my abdomen and she wraps her hand around my throbbing cock.
“Can I taste you?”
“Always, but don’t feel like you have too. I’ll be alright if not.”
“I want too.” She says before pushing me towards the shower bench and taking me in her mouth. In no time at all, I’m coming down her throat after receiving one of the best blowjobs of my life. She has my legs trembling from the stimulation and I can’t help but caress her cheek and kiss her gently when I come back to reality.
“my EmKay.” I whisper as I kiss her tenderly.
“Your EmKay?” She asks. 
“Mmhmm.” 
“Funny, I don’t remember being asked to be yours.” She haughtily replies.
“Ya’ ain’t going to make this easy on me, are ya?” Shit, what am I doing. I should have thought this through. She shouldn't want to be with me. The unreal blowjob has me not thinking clearly.
“Now why would I do that?” She retorts with a smile. I palm her cheek so that she’s looking right at me.
“Will you be my woman?” I ask seriously. Fuck it. Why not?
“Only if you’re my man.” 
“Well, I’ve been told that I’m a bear, but I’ll be your man too.” I joke before pressing my lips against Emma’s in a feverish kiss.
As the water gets cold, we finally climb out and get dressed for the day. I decide to take Emma out for breakfast at the diner in town before we go in search of furniture for her guest bedroom. Her parents are arriving next weekend and it was adorable when she shyly asked me if I’d be willing to meet them. I assured her that I’d be happy too and to just let me know when.
We spend a few hours at the furniture store where Emma purchases a matching bedroom set before going to a mattress store and trying out all of the mattresses to determine which would be a good purchase for her guest bedroom. They are able to deliver it same day which is nice so we pick a time for it to arrive that afternoon. We then head to a department store so she can pick out curtains, bed linens, and other odds and ends that I’m told a room requires like lamps and decorations. Being a single man for the majority of my adulthood that was mostly away in the military, I didn’t realize how much work women put into buying all of this shit. Why does she need the guest bath towels to match the hand towel in the bathroom? Or all of the little knick-knack items she bought to go on the dresser? I’m even more confused when she was discussing bed trains? No bed skirts. I’ve slept on friends couches without even a blanket but she’s really rolling out the red carpet for her parents. It’s a bit concerning if they are expecting all of this from their daughter who has lived here for under two months. Maybe they don’t expect it and she’s just trying to show them that she’s a capable adult who plans on settling here. I watch as she spends a small fortune trying to get everything in order for their visit. It’s obvious that she values their opinions. What if they don’t like me? I’m certainly different from the preppy type of guy that they’re used to seeing her with. I’m kind of rough around the edges and although I think I’m pretty smart, I certainly don’t hold advanced degrees. I’m broken from my thoughts when Emma asks my opinion about curtains. It’s sweet that she wants my opinion but I’m a fish out of water when it comes to decorating.
We load up all of the stuff and head back to Emma’s house where I get started hanging curtains as we wait on the furniture and mattress delivery. Emma orders us pizza and we munch on pizza and beer for a while. I’m regretting all of my additional workouts after I finally get the bed put together and the mattress put on it. Emma tried to help but she’s so little I didn’t want her to hurt herself so I ended up just man-handling it myself. She had washed the new bedding and put everything together before we took a look at it and she dove across the top of the bed. Emma patted the space beside her and I laid down next to her on top of the comforter. 
“I’m fucking exhausted and I didn’t even lift the heavy stuff.” She exhaled.
“I didn’t realize it was so much work to put together a bedroom. You sure know what you’re doing though.”
“Thank you. I just pick what I like. I couldn’t have done it all without you though, so thank you, baby. I can’t wait to have them visit and see that I’ve got my shit together here. That I’m not some dumb kid who needs rescuing. I’m able to handle myself.” Ahh, so I was right about that. It’s about proving herself to her parents.
“I think they’ll be impressed, Sugar. I know I am.” I smile at her before yawning.
She kisses my lips before scratching my beard gently. 
“Can we go back to yours, shower and then go to sleep? I’m dead on my feet.” She asks as she stands up and fluffs the new pillows. Why are there like 5 pillows that will just get thrown on the floor? Seems wasteful.
“You still want to come back to mine with me?”
She nods. “I want to be with you and the pups. Since they are at yours, it wouldn’t make sense to get them and come back here. I always sleep really good with you…Unless you’re too tired for a sleep over.” She says sheepishly and I wrap my arms around her.
“Nothing could be better than having my girl in my bed with me.” I tell her because I’m beginning to believe it’s the truth. “Let’s go.” 
We turn out all of the lights and lock up before heading back to mine. Emma’s car is still parked out front from where she left it and it makes me happy that she wants to be here with me. There’s a summer storm approaching and the wind has picked up which has Emma’s hair twirling in the breeze. I pull the patio cushions inside when I let the dogs out to do their business. After a quick shower because we are both too tired to do anything but clean ourselves, we do our nighttime routines before climbing into bed. Emma snuggles next to me with her head on my chest and I’m confident that it’s going to be a good night as we drift off to sleep.
It’s hot, but more than just hot. It’s sweltering. I can feel the sweat rolling down my chest and my back. It’s the type of unbearable heat that has your clothes sticking to your skin the instant you walk out of the mess hall. Then you add your gear, and the added weight from your gear plus your sweat soaked clothes is a certain feeling that I’ll never forget. I smell the smoke of an explosion further in the distance. We have our orders and it’s my job to lead our special forces team in to execute our orders exactly like planned. The problem with that is that most things never go as planned. It would be easy for this to be a cookie cutter mission where we get in and out and go back to base and fuck around for the rest of the afternoon. No, this will require me thinking on my feet at every turn. It’s what I’m trained for, hell, I’m the best which is why I’m the captain. I’ve got seven men with me whose lives rely on me assessing our situation and giving correct orders. They are sons, husbands, fathers, brothers, and friends who have people waiting on them at home. Each order I give is weighted by the knowledge that I’m responsible for them. We’re crouched in different positions behind the old dilapidated building that the informant said our guy would be in. The sun is glaring across our faces but we’re in the best position we could be in for this mission. We’ve been after this specific hostile for months and never been this close to him before. We can hear men inside the building, yelling in Arabic and moving around so we must remain completely silent. If we can hear them, they could hear us. We are ghosts that can’t be seen or heard but must work as a team for this to go smoothly. If one person spots us, it will turn into a close-range gun fight that I can’t imagine we will all win. I inhale deeply and even though there is dust on every inch of myself and the ground, I try to focus my thoughts. 
As I am about to give orders to direct my guys to move on to the next step of our plan, I hear the tell-tale whistle of a bullet zipping through the air. I swivel to the left with my gun and look for the insurgent. I can’t see anyone but the bullet buries itself in the left shoulder of Waites across the way from me. We were fucking set up. I swing my gun back around and that’s when it happens, I hear the bullet and feel it explode into my lower left thigh at the same time blood spews from my friend, Goodwin’s head who had crouched beside me when I stood to look for the shooter. My leg gives out and I instantly drop down into the dirt to where I’m level with Goodwin’s face and it’s obvious, he was killed instantly. His eyes are still opened and he has a massive wound to the head. Anthony. Fuck. His girlfriend is expecting a baby girl in a few months. My leg is burning from the inside out but my adrenaline spike helps me ignore the pain and I grab my gun and instantly start shooting towards the rooftop where I believe the sniper might be. I hear Brown screaming before I realize he’s got Waites against the building and is yelling into the radio for help. I watch as insurgents start coming out of the building we were casing and I start taking them out. Lowell goes down. Setas is either hurt or attempting to provide aid to Lowell. I can’t tell but I never stop shooting. Ramirez is also trying to find the source of the ambush with his own gun. Bullets are flying, many from my own gun as I empty the clip into the only building the sniper could have been on, Browns pleas for backup, along with Waites heavy gurgling breaths fill my ears. I feel a hand on my arm and flinch.
            “Austin! Captain…Captain Syverson. Look at me.” Two hands on either side of my face help me focus in. “St..Stand down. You are safe, the threat has been eliminated. Your superiors have given orders to return to base for further instruction. Do you understand?” 
I blink against the water that’s dripping down my face. Emma?
“My men. The injured men in my unit. Where?”
“They are at base getting medical. Captain, I need you to confirm that you understand me.”
I blink and then nod slowly. “Roger that.” I mutter distractedly. I look around. I’m in the backyard of my house, leaning against the brick exterior in my underwear. I have my pistol tucked in the back of the waistband of my boxers and I’m wearing the boots I leave by the back door. In my hands I’m clutching my old hunting rifle that I keep on the top shelf of my closet. Shit. I’ve done it again. I’ve had a PTSD nightmare, but this is so much worse because Emma is here to witness it. I look over at her. She’s crouching on her knees in front of me wearing nothing but my water-soaked t-shirt and panties while she’s barefoot in the mud. Water is dripping from the ends of her hair from the rain that’s pouring down on us. She looks terrified and concerned. 
“Fuck, I’m so sorry.” My throat aches either from unshed tears or maybe I was yelling earlier.
“Austin, baby, are you back?”
I nod. “Emma, I’m so sorry.” I mutter as tears mix with the rain that drips down my face. This is what I was afraid would happen if I got close to her. If I let her in. I would relax and then my past would quite literally present itself.
“Baby, don’t be. You’re okay, we’re okay.” She tells me as she reaches towards my face that’s now aimed at the ground.
“Aika?” 
“I left her inside. I know you said she could help but I wasn’t able to tell if your rifle was loaded and I didn’t want her startling you and there being an accident.” 
Jesus. She was afraid I’d shoot my own dog, because she’s right, I was nowhere near my right mind. Here we are over six months since my last flashback yet this was the most involved PTSD episode I’ve ever had. Thank fuck I keep my ammunition locked and separate from my guns for situations like this. 
She stands and reaches to help me up but I can’t let her help me stand. My leg feels as though it has been shot just yesterday but that could be a result of me crouching on my knees in freezing rain outside in the middle of the night, not just the psychological pain from my flashback. 
“Come on baby.” She takes the rifle from my hand and I don’t protest. I follow her silently back to the house. The air conditioning on our soaked skin has both of our bodies covered in goose bumps. Aika bounds to me whining and crying and I sit down in a chair from the table and run my hands through her thick fur. I bury my face into her back and focus on breathing. My palm clutches my leg that’s radiating phantom pain from where I got shot. Emma appears next to me with a towel but hesitates. 
“Can I help you clean up a bit?” She gestures with the towel.
I nod and she leans down and starts wiping the mud off of my legs. 
“Sugar, I…”
“Baby, nothing needs to be said. I’m okay, and you are going to be. Would you take a warm shower with me?” I look at her and want to just burst into tears. How is she so kind and understanding after what I just did? After what I could have done?
“Please?” She urges and I nod. I follow her to the master bathroom and watch as she turns the water on. Aika stays close and sits down behind me in the bathroom floor. I have no idea what time it is in the night or early morning or how long she’s been awake dealing with me. Emma pulls out two fresh towels for us and then whips the sodden shirt off of her torso before removing her panties. She looks at me and then slowly and gently eases my soaked boxer briefs down my legs before taking my hand and pulling for me to get in the shower. Once I step in, steam surrounds me and I take a deep breath. I’m exhausted, flashbacks always take the energy out of me and it’s not like I’ve been sleeping great this past week. Emma begins lathering a wash cloth with soap and gently starts cleaning me. I stand there perfectly still and let her do what she wants as I attempt to think of anything that I could say to make this situation better. I’m aching with embarrassment. Once she washes me, she quickly washes herself before turning around and caressing her hand on my cheek. She leans down and picks up my wrists that were laying limp by my sides and wraps them around her waist before putting her own around my neck. My eyes are aimed down focusing on the suds swirling around the shower drain.
“Baby, look at me.” She says with the sincerest and worried look on her face and that’s when my resolve breaks. I bury my face into her neck as the hot tears stream from my eyes. I can’t seem to stop them and I ache when I hear myself let out a sob that sounds so painful and broken even to my own ears. Emma tightens her arms around me and guides me back to the bench that we once used for a much different form of intimacy. Emma curls herself around me and holds me tightly while I fully break down. Once my breath starts to come easier, I carefully pull my head from her shoulder and try to clean my face up.
“Let’s dry off and lay down.” She says as she turns off the water and starts toweling me off. I gently take the towel from her, not wanting to be babied but not wanting to seem ungrateful. Once we dry off, Emma hands me some boxers and she tosses on a dry shirt and panties on before we sit on the bed. It’s silent and I feel like I have to say something.
“I’m sorry. I can’t imagine what you must be thinkin’ but I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I woke you, scared you and I’m sorry I’m so fucked up. I completely understand if this is the last time I see you.” I say quietly and she looks shocked.
“Austin, I’m not going anywhere. This is what relationships are about. Holding each other through the good and bad. I’m not scared and you’re not fucked up. You’re haunted and although I don’t know the details of it, I want to help you through it. Even if you don’t want my help, I’m not leaving you.”
“You shouldn’t have to deal with this. I should be better. I survived, Damnit! I shouldn’t have any problems. Goodwin, Lowell, Waites, they are the ones who died. I just got shot in my stupid fucking leg after leading them to their deaths!” I sob.
“You are allowed to have problems. Their deaths are hard on you but you are not responsible for it. I don’t know what happened, but I know it’s not your fault.”
“The informant set us up, we were ambushed. Goodwin, God. Goodwin got shot right in front of me. I watched the life drain from his eyes. He has a little girl that he’s never met. If I had questioned the mission from my superiors or done more digging on the informant, they would all be alive right now. I had to look at their family members at their funerals and I’ll never forget the grief from their loved ones. Goodwin’s pregnant girlfriend, Lowell’s widow, Waites’ mom. I still see them sobbing over their caskets in my mind. I didn’t deserve to live when they didn’t get too.” I finally say out loud. I take deep breaths attempting to calm my body from going into another spiral.
“Bear.” Emma reaches for me.
“It’s been years and I still get like this. Hell, it might be getting worse. I don’t think this is something I’ll just get over. I’m too fucked up, Emma. You deserve someone who doesn’t have these types of demons.” My eyes blink heavily.
“You are not fucked up. I deserve you because you treat me better than I’ve ever been treated before.” My eyes droop and I know it’s a result of the flashback. When I have them, my body goes through the trauma all over again so when the adrenaline finally stops coursing through my body, I basically crash.
“Love, you look exhausted. Can you try to sleep for me?” She asks and gently pushes for me to lay down. My head is resting between her breasts as she lays back on her back. We’ve never laid like this before but it’s comforting.
“I’m right here, I’m not leaving. Aika’s here and so is Mills.” She tells me while caressing my head but my eyes are already closed, too heavy to fight staying open longer. I wrap my arm around her waist and within moments, I’m deeply asleep soothed by the steady rhythm of Emma’s heartbeat as she caresses my scalp.
Part 11
Taglist: @shellyshellshell, @henryownsme, @caramariehurst, @beck07990, @mollymal, @kingliam2019, @syversonswife, @identity2212, @starfirewildheart, @hannah9921, @wa-ni, @kneelforloki, @cutedoxie, @enchantedbytomandhenry, @foxyjwls007, @geralts-yenn, @courtlynwriter, @corrie1013, @squeezyvalkyrie, @summersong69, @livisss, @mayloma, @uunotheangel, @warriormirkwood
137 notes · View notes
honkytonk-hangman · 8 months
Text
Just Another Thing – [1]
Walt 'Finn' Finnegan x Reader/OC
Tumblr media
Summary: God help anyone who might've thought a nice, stable relationship might bring some kind of change to Walt Finnegan's usual mischief and mild-hedonism. God especially help them if they also thought a girlfriend would provide any sort of calming influence over him.
She definitely influenced him, anyone could tell you that, unfortunately just never in any way that could even remotely be described as 'calm'.
Warnings: cussing, mentions of and talk of sex, sexy body parts, ect. reader/OC is named Kimberly/Kimber, but it is still written in second person and her name shouldn't come up very often.
Notes: oh boy oh boy oh boy you have no clue how excited i am for this fic. it's literally been in the works for over a year. i'd even go as far as to say it's my fave fic in recent memory!!! Im not sure yet how many parts, but the story does have a beginning and end.
It's not necessary to have watched the film before reading this fic, as this is set in the year after, around 1982, however certain character dynamics could be confusing. Also i definitely headcanon Finn and Beverly becoming good friends, hidden beneath a layer of exasperation of course but he is definitely the type to go to all the theatre stuff like come on look at him!!!!!
okay enough from me now heres the fic I really hope you enjoy!!!
Tumblr media
You register the alarm on your friends’ face’s far too late to do anything, and the next thing you know you’re clutching the crown of your head, a dull throbbing ache now pulsing under your fingertips.
It wasn’t an entirely unfamiliar sensation, you’ve been hit in the head by a ball plenty of times, but the sheer weight behind this particular impact stood out to you. That, and you knew it couldn’t have been the volleyball you and your friend’s were playing with, because you currently held it.
“What the fu–” you begin angrily, already whipping around in the direction you’d been hit, cutting yourself off at the sight of an approaching man, a look of genuine remorse painted on his features as he jogs toward you. Behind him, a group of guys with baseball gloves watch on with various cringing expressions. Just as the man nears you, his eyes subtly travel up and down your figure, his lip quirking with approval, but he keeps his face apologetic. He comes to a stop several feet away, where the baseball had landed, but doesn’t take his eyes off of you, placing his hands on his hips and lifting his chin at you.
“Sorry ‘bout that,” he says, and it at least sounds sincere. “Roper’s never had much of an eye.”
You purse your lips, but try not to look too angry. He was cute, you realise dumbly, still rubbing your head. Dirty blond hair settled in light waves at the top of his collar, a matching blond moustache groomed neatly above his upper lip. He was tall, broad across the shoulders and chest in a way you’d only ever really seen on guys who worked out, athletes and the like. He also looked a little older than a lot of the students you’d see walking around campus, and he certainly didn’t approach you with the confidence of a freshman, so you figure he must be at least an upperclassmen.
“Well, maybe y'all should work on that with him,” you grumble lightly, and drop your hand.
“You okay?” he nods at your head, and you shift to lean on one foot, not missing the flicker of his eyes to watch as you do, or the way he lingers on your rapidly rising and falling chest before he meets your eye again.
“Isn’t the first time, certainly won’t be the last. Hair probably won’t sit right tonight, though,” you complain.
“Big date?” he asks, the teasing tone unmistakable. You lift your chin a little indignantly.
“I’m sure your day is just riding on my answer, but I don’t feel particularly inclined on telling you that,” you huff, heart rate doubling when he laughs, looking away from you for the first time as he grins widely.
“Well, how about this,” he starts once he’s sobered, bending down to swipe the baseball from the grass, taking a step toward you as he does. “The next time I see you, I promise you won’t get hit in the head,” he waves the ball as if you need reminding, but takes another step closer. “And you tell me what night works best to take you out?”
You fail to hide the amused smile that pulls at your lips, but then again, you weren’t really one for playing hard to get. You can see now that he’s only a few feet away, that his eyes are a startling green, and you think you wouldn’t mind running into him again, sans head injury.
“Alright,” you tell him, stepping back with a nod. “Next time.”
It takes all of your will power to turn away from him and move back towards your friends, though you feel his eyes on you for some distance, and make sure you swing your hips just a little more than you usually might.
Part of you regrets not making plans then and there, but the other part of you shivers at the already building tension of your potential next meeting.
Tumblr media
Squinting at your reflection in the mirror, you flip your feathery waves once more over your shoulder, before almost immediately letting it fall back where it was. Just as you’d predicted, thanks to the decent-sized lump on the crown of your head, your Jerry Hall blowout was looking less supermodel and more super-odd.
Scrunching your nose as you mess with your tresses one last time, let out a huff, and force yourself to turn away, just in time for Nancy to appear at your open door, her curled fingers tapping gently on the wood.
“Hey Kimber,” she begins, pausing to give you a whistle as you exit your bathroom and do a twirl for her. Your collared halter-neck jumpsuit was supposed to be worn with a ruffle-neck blouse, but you’d never intended to style it that way, not to mention it was tight enough that you’re not totally sure you’d even be able to fit said blouse beneath it anyway.
“Something’s telling me Miss Texas ‘56 didn’t have this particular ensemble in mind when she ordered this for you outta her fancy lil’ Saks catalogue…” Nancy teases. You roll your eyes.
“Saks don’t do catalogues.” you correct her with a faux air of haughtiness, but don’t bother to contend her point. All of your housemates were more than familiar with your former Beauty Queen mother, despite never having met her. The monthly ‘care packages’ she sent you, filled with various ‘in season’ (see: frivolous) items of clothing and ‘essentials’ spoke volumes about who exactly Mrs Charlene Wynne was. That mostly just amounting to ‘eternally neurotic but well-meaning’. 
Nancy pokes her tongue out at you and scoffs out a laugh.
“Whatever, the point is; Mama doesn't always know best. You look foxy!”
You let out a laugh and smooth your hands over your thighs, thanking her softly.
You weren’t at all oblivious to the way you looked. Certainly you were no Raquel Welch, but most days you could manage something in the realm of Christie Brinkley or Cheryl Ladd, which was pretty damn good. You had your mother to thank for that, though your dad was no slouch either, but considering your mother couldn’t walk ten steps without someone recognising her from her Miss Texas win almost thirty years ago, you’ll give her most of the credit. As a result of your parent’s contributions, you’d become aware fairly quickly of the effect you tended to have on men, especially College men.
“Did you need me for something?” you prompt after a few more moments of Nancy preening over your outfit, remembering that she had come up here with a purpose some minutes ago now. Nancy blinks, before she makes a soft gasping sound, and straightens up.
“That’s right! Beverley arrived a little while ago, she was asking for you!” she informs you, waving her hand in the vague direction of the stairs and the party quickly coming to life on the first floor.
“I’m coming now!” you tell her, giving your hair one last flip before you move for your door, closing it behind you and quickly following Nancy as she all but skips. 
The ‘little’ get together had officially started a little while ago, but you’d had a study group that had run long, meaning you were now fashionably late to your own houseparty, if there were even such a thing.
Almost immediately once you crest the lower steps, you feel yourself shift into focus, totally in your element now, a cool, easy smile finding a place on your features. It isn’t difficult for you to move through the light throngs of people, despite your arrival not going unnoticed by those around you, but instead of excusing yourself meekly past distracted conversationalists, you’re liked enough that partygoers both consciously and subconsciously make way for you, plenty of familiar faces greeting you warmly in passing as you go.
You aren't surprised to find the kitchen milling with guests too, though the music is a little quieter here, so you figure it will remain more sparsely populated until later in the night, when everyone is comfortably tipsy.
“Kimberley!” A female voice calls out, perhaps a little too loudly, but you’d come to expect as much from anyone deeply involved in theatre.
“Beverly!” you match her energy, volume and all, knowing that she was likely already feeling a little out of place among the other guests, who were all mostly part of the College’s various sports teams and who you suspect weren’t even aware there even was a theatre program.
You can’t stop yourself from grinning ecstatically, overjoyed to see your friend for the first time since classes had commenced for the year. However, you feel more than you see the redhead that collides with you, her much shorter frame crashing into yours with a comforting force, and thanks to your non incosiderable height, as well as your many years playing volleyball, you hardly even budge from the impact, even in your chunky platform heels. You quickly hug Beverley in return, but far sooner than you’d like, she’s pulling back and launching into what sounds like a planned monologue.
“Okay! So, you know how ages ago I said I was going to set you up with one of Jake’s housemates from the baseball house?” Beverly starts, already waving her hands expressively, her expression bright and excited. You search your mind, but honestly, you aren’t sure if the conversation sounds familiar or not. You’d had a lot of people say similar things to you throughout your college career so far. Most of the time they were totally off-base matches, but you were always happy to experience new things, new people.
Beverley doesn’t wait for your reply though, clapping her hands and rubbing them together.
“Well, of course the team was invited tonight, meaning I can finally introduce you!” she exclaims, looking wildly over her shoulder, as though the person in question was supposed to be just behind her. When she sees an empty kitchen, she frowns and purses her lips. The glimmer of annoyance is wiped from her face by the time she’s looking back at you, and she huffs good-naturedly.
“I told him to wait for me…” she links your arms as she speaks, and you happily let her lead you to the kitchen door, where a light bubble of conversation floats through from outside. You have to let out a laugh at her sheer excitement, which appears genuine, though not in her usual manner. 
The usual manner meaning that every so often when the two of you found yourselves at the same club or bar, whenever she or her friend’s were being bothered, the pretty redhead would giddily inform you that she had someone she wanted you to meet, then standing back and watching gleefully as you casually sapped up the creep’s attention, only to bluntly shoot him down and send him off. 
You don’t get the feeling this is one of those times, but from what you knew of the baseball team, you very well may have to do some shooing on your own behalf tonight.
Outside on the tiny back-deck, a small group of people had gathered and right away your brain sparks with familiarity, though you have very little time to consider this before Beverley is releasing your arm and stepping forward. She smiles brightly as she sweeps between you and a man who turns around as if on cue.
“Finn, this is Kimberley Wynn! Kimberley, this is Finn! I am almost certain that the two of you will get along famously,” Beverely announces with a flourish and a wink. You and Finn both blink startled at one another for several moments, before mutual recognition quickly sets in. Your lips slowly pull into a wide grin, and you don’t bother hiding the fact that you’re now looking him over with no subtly, just as he’d done to you earlier in the park. 
“I’m not about to get clobbered again, am I?” you begin flirtily, glad that the man, Finn, recognises you as well, though unlike you, he seems to avoid taking the opportunity to check you out again, to his loss. Instead, he smiles big, almost showmanly, and takes up a slight lean on the railing behind him.
“If it’s any consolation, your hair looks great,” Finn replies cooly, and it’s almost as though you’d never parted ways at all. You flick your hair over your shoulder, seeing how his eyes follow the movement before they’re locked back on yours and you already know you’ve got this man hook, line and sinker.
“Luckily for you,” you sniff, though your smile undercuts any real resentment. Finn seems to grin a little wider then, more genuinely than the showman smile. You think the way his eyes crinkle in the corners is sweet, and that he should smile that way all the time.
“Wait, you two already know each other?!” Beverley cuts in, suddenly reminding you that she was in fact still standing there, watching and listening. “How?!” the redhead demands, not going so far as to stomp a foot, but she does cross her arms in a huff as she looks between the two of you in betrayed disbelief, though you note most of her ire seems directed at Finn.
The blonde swings his gaze back to the shorter woman, seemingly tickled by her apparent annoyance, yet his teasing expression is full to the brim with endeared fondness. You get the impression that this was the natural state of their friendship, and that Finn is about to say something inflammatory just to get a bigger rise, which might be a little funny, but you cut in before he can speak, relieving Beverly of her confusion.
“All Star over here threw a baseball at my head this afternoon,” you say pointedly, making sure he doesn’t mistake your happiness to see him for forgiveness. Finn holds his hands up then, and jerks a thumb in the direction of a man in the larger group of party goers on the porch.
“Roper threw a baseball at your head this afternoon,” he corrects you, as though that should absolve you of your attitude.
“Oh, that’s right! You just failed to catch it!” you tease, watching as he winces dramatically and grasps at his chest.
“You wound me sweetheart!” he exclaims ruefully, and despite the vaguely amicable antagonism, you can see now why he and Beverly are friends.
“Then we’re even.” You say. You already agree with the redhead’s earlier assessment; the two of you were going to get along famously.
Finn shrugs in a manner that reads more as relenting than indifference, and at least some of his overly performative act comes away. Beverley scoffs a laugh, rolling her eyes heavily as she reaches out to shove Finn in the arm. He sways, you think for her benefit, which makes you smile.
“Only you could throw a baseball that hits the one girl on campus who’d actually put up with you…” she snorts, seemingly assuming his chances with you were now dashed. Finn raises a finger in protest.
“As we just discussed, I only failed to catch the ball that hit the one girl on campus who may or may not be willing to put up with me. I’d like that to go on record.” He smiles at her simperingly. Beverley regards him with a withering look for several seconds, before choosing to ignore him entirely, turning to you.
“Have fun.” she says, sounding much more like her usual manner, though before you can tell her it’s alright, she’s already spun away, and when you find her again, she’s tucking herself under the arm of her boyfriend, Jake.
You shake your head, and look back at Finn, finding his gaze already locked on you. He pushes away from the railing then, and steps toward you.
“You know what this is?” he asks you, once more sounding like an actor reading lines, and gesturing between you. “Fate.” he says, lowering his voice somewhat like it was a secret just for the two of you.
You cock your head at his odd little act, though you aren’t entirely un-charmed by it. It was rather different to when you’d met this afternoon, despite his blatant flirting then, now it was as if you were speaking with a completely different person. A stage magician, perhaps.
“So, why don’t we go get a drink in your hand, and then you can tell me which day works for our upcoming date.” Finn gives a slight flourish, and while his whole demeanour is still clearly put on, there is an endearing element to his theatrics, a silliness that you might find more charming if it didn’t feel so much like he was performing for you.
He offers you his arm graciously, which you can imagine combined with his hyped up charm, would have plenty of women already giggling into their sleeves, which you don’t do, but you do place your other hand over his warm skin as well, and allow him to lead you back into the kitchen.
“So what’ll it be? Beer? Fruity punch? Fruity punch and beer?” he wiggles his eyebrows at you, and even though he’s still playing a role of some kind, it’s not hard for you to see through it.
“Fruity punch,” you say decisively. “Can’t stand the taste of beer.” You tell him honestly, watching as he goes about procuring you a glass of the punch you yourself had made, and appreciating the effort he puts in to make sure you have at least two cherries, though, you don’t think he means it to be suggestive, despite your own thoughts going straight to the gutter over the matter.
“So, what you’re saying is; I should switch to the punch if I want to test this theory about you being the one girl on campus who’ll put up with me later?” he asks in amusement, at last handing you your drink, his eyes sparkling. You accept the drink and give a noncommittal shrug as you take a small sip. 
“Oh, that’s not necessary, but I’ll certainly appreciate it later.” You really feel no need to go along with his act, not seeing any reason to play coy about your intentions, not in the way he seemed to feel was par for the course at least. You watch as Finn takes a moment to actually process your words, a brief mix of surprise and curiosity passing over his features, but it’s quickly covered up by a much more ‘cool’ looking mask.
You have to crack a smile at his sheer determination to convince you to have sex with him, the poor man somehow didn’t realise he was preaching to the choir.
“You really do look fantastic, by the way,” Finn says after a few moments of awkward quiet pass. You push aside your amusement, and grin happily at him, smoothing your hand over the material fondly.
“Thanks! I feel like one of ‘Charlie’s Angels’,” you gush a little, briefly feeling silly for bringing up the comparison, however, this time Finn’s smile makes the corners of his eyes crinkle in that way you liked, making his whole face seem softer and more natural, pouring with warmth.
“Trust me, Farrah’s got nothing on you right now,” he tells you sweetly, continuing to fondly watch you preen, not just at the compliment, but because you think this might be the first time all evening he isn’t speaking from some kind of script.
The moment passes quickly, though, and as you duck your head to accept his praise, you see his face momentarily scrunching up in a wince, like he was scolding himself for saying something so saccharine. You consider telling him that you found the sweetness endlessly more endearing than any of the other lines so far, but you hold your tongue. You had a small feeling that his pretence was really more about him, than about you, at least to a degree.
Tumblr media
Finn is about halfway through earnestly telling you about his apparently ‘average’ sized cock when you at last run out of patience. The gimmick itself was entertaining enough, definitely an original approach to picking up women, and you’d even played along to start with, but you can’t help wondering why you’re standing around talking about his cock when you could be doing other things with it instead.
While he’s still talking, you reach into your pocket and dig around for a moment, before you find what you’re after. Finn trails off when you turn and lay the coin face-side up on his forearm. He blinks at it in confusion, for a few seconds, before looking questioningly up at you.
“Penny for your thoughts?” you ask before he can speak again, and force yourself not to pump your fist triumphantly when his confusion is quickly replaced with affection. Sure, you knew he wanted to have sex with you already, but now he thought you were cute, too.
“Alright,” he answers simply, fully angling his body toward yours, leaning in closer to you at the same time.
“So, this whole ‘average sized cock’ thing, does it actually work? I mean, has it worked when you’ve used it before?” you tip your head up at him, genuinely curious, but you don’t miss the way Finn’s features fall blank for a second after you speak, his smile fading, replaced with mild discomfort. He seems to shift back from you slightly, regarding you once more before he replies.
“I guess this is the time it doesn’t.” He all but mutters, his frown deepening as he looks away from you again, clearing his throat this time and straightening up, obviously embarrassed. He crosses his arms over his chest and looks back at you evenly.
“Could’ve stopped me earlier,” he says a little stiffly, though seemingly coming to terms with whatever direction he now thought this conversation was taking. You can’t help yourself then, his sulking making you laugh, fully and joyfully, but before he can sulk further, you lay your hand gently on his arm, over the penny, and give him a light squeeze. You shake your head as your laughter dies down, and fix him with a warm expression
“I never said it wasn’t working– in a manner of speaking,” You softly tell him, watching as he blinks down at you. You hurry to explain. “I mean don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t working, but only because it’s totally unbelievable.”
Finn at last relaxes somewhat, though his slight frown remains as he considers your complaint.
“What’s so unbelievable about it?” he demands, in a way that tells you this pick-up tactic was one he was proud of, though clear playfulness had returned to his voice.
Confident that you were now talking, actually talking to Finn as he was, and not as he thought would get him laid, you feel energised to engage with the subject matter more seriously. You scoff and roll your eyes at his indignation.
“Firstly,” you start, shifting to lean on your hip, bringing you closer once again. “No guy is ever going to accept, let alone admit that he has an average sized-cock, and he’s definitely not going to admit it to a woman he wants to fuck.” You say matter-of-factly, though you didn’t have anything more than your not-insubstantial intimate experiences with men to go off of as proof.
“Guys who really are average, don’t think that they are, and they probably never will because no woman is going to bring up the fact that his seven inch cock looks suspiciously closer to five.” you wave your hands a little, not realising before now that you really had any firm opinions on this subject.
You see the cogs in Finn’s brain turning as he regards your words with something that resembles amused but genuine interest. You figure he hadn’t expected you to really have a point, which to be fair, you hadn’t expected either. You do plan to let him respond, but you suddenly remember something else you’d been thinking about earlier, when he’d first brought up the concept.
“–And! In my experience, guys who do have big cocks, they don’t really say anything, or they mislead you entirely, so that they can get off on hearing you telling him how big he is.”
That earns a hearty laugh from Finn, who shrugs a shoulder in admittance at that point at the very least. He’d returned at last to watching you fondly, and you think once more that Beverley had been spot on in introducing the two of you. You’re pretty sure Finn is the only man who would so happily, or nonchalantly debate with you about the size of other men’s cocks, just as you’re sure that you’re the only woman on campus who has ever challenged him on it.
Finn hums in thought. “So, you believe men will only ever overcompensate or undercompensate?” he asks, but it's more of a statement. He watches you intently as he tips his chin, and you nod.
“Exactly.”
A moment passes between the two of you, before Finn leans forward, right into your space, wearing a pleased smirk.
“In that case honey,” he starts, voice sounding a little deeper now, huskier somehow. “What’s the verdict then?” he stares at you unwaveringly, challenging you. You frown.
“The verdict on what?” you ask, though at this point you couldn’t muster much genuine interest, not when all this verbal foreplay was slowing down the process of getting him in your bedroom for some actual foreplay.
Finn’s smirk grows then, seemingly glad you’d asked. You watch as his eyes dip briefly down to your chest, where his height and closeness grant him a very good view of your tits. He meets your gaze again before he speaks.
“Do you think I’m overcompensating, or undercompensating?”
You blink and stare at him as you process, not even bothering to hide your captivation, but it lasts for mere seconds before your lips are curling into a coy smile to match his own. You copy his move then, dropping your eyes to take in the front of his jeans, but you don’t look back up again as he had. Instead, you reach out and begin tracing his belt buckle. Finn inhales sharply, clearly taken off guard by your forwardness, which was clearly working for him.
You’re momentarily distracted from his belt as you catch sight of the rather sizable bulge forming at the front of his pants, giving you a pretty good idea of what the verdict should be. You lick your lips without really thinking, but take full advantage of the way Finn’s eyes follow the movement, tracing the path over your now wet mouth as he awaits your answer. You lean in, closing the miniscule distance between you at last, and give his belt a teasing little tug toward you.
“Y’know, I haven’t a clue,” you lie nonchalantly, your smile only growing when you use his belt to pull yourself in and press right up against his front. “But I’d love to find out.”
Tumblr media
90 notes · View notes
bird-inacage · 23 days
Text
Tumblr media
This is finally my review on GMMTV's wildly popular 'Only Friends' which saw out 2023 in style. I do realise this is almost a year since it's release, but I find that time often allows for more objectivity.
Let me start by saying that the buzz and anticipation for this show was immense. The raunchier offering was a departure from GMMTV's typical affair, paired with the understandable hype over a powerhouse of a cast. The excitement reflected an obvious appetite for messier queer relationships to be explored on screen.
Tumblr media
I personally had a great time overall with this series, and was highly entertained throughout by the drama. The story isn't airtight, but the plot packs in plenty of twists and turns to keep you on your toes (and I was repeatedly caught off guard). I give kudos to any show that can keep me guessing. The pacing is mostly consistent, with a lot of story packed into 12 episodes. It allows for sufficient character trajectories to be explored and concluded. The final Boeing arc could have made a bigger impact if it had been signposted sooner.
The main couple here are Mew and Top, but both SandRay and BostonNick get a decent distribution of screen time. I've found the general consensus to be that Mew and Top's relationship is the least interesting of the three, and I would agree. You do get very different flavours and conflicts with each couple, as well as complex layers across this entangled web, so there's likely something for everyone.
The lessons learned by our characters is what I feel this show does really competently. We follow them as they royally fuck-up, they fail, learn and grow. The arcs depicted feel very relatable. How can you continue to love someone after they've hurt you? Should you allow your feelings for someone to determine your own self worth? Should you try to change yourself for love? What does it mean to love selflessly, or selfishly? Can friendship and love exist hand-in-hand?
Out of three main couples, two survived. I think Boston and Nick going their separate ways was the only satisfactory ending they could've gotten. Mew choosing to no longer stay friends with Boston was also incredibly valid. When people hurt us, sometimes they can be forgiven, but sometimes they cannot - and that's a valuable lesson in itself.
Tumblr media
This is a very strong ensemble cast. The standouts for me are Khaotung and Neo. Khaotung's range is masterful to watch. Neo gave us one of the best villains I've seen in a while. Boston was an absolute joy to hate. What I loved about their performances is you could tell how much fun they were having. I also have to shout out Force, who did a brilliant job of making me utterly loathe Top. But I must stress that it's a real treat to have a cast where everyone pulls their weight.
The series also makes the effort to portray many side dynamics that I hugely appreciated. I thought Ray and Mew's friendship was told beautifully. I adored Nick and Sand's platonic affection for one another. I liked seeing the healthy parental dynamics Sand and Mew have with their respective mothers. Yo's friendship with the younger cast is lovely. The only player I think was glaringly under-utilised is Namcheum. Her character fell really flat in comparison, and didn't add much value to the friendship group. Considering she was one of our few female characters, her presence was rather forgettable.
I'll do a special mention on First and Khaotung, as they are my faves.
Tumblr media
Acting Performance: What I commend First and Khaotung on is the ying/yang extremes of Sand and Ray. Sand is a role that requires a lot of restraint. First was told by P'Jojo on a number of occasions that he couldn't cry. To hold in and hold back, and still emote with range and nuance is super challenging. While Ray needs the opposite treatment; to be outwardly explosive across all his emotions. Khaotung put himself through the absolute wringer to bring Ray to life, and it shows. Their fight scene in Episode 10 still gives me goosebumps every time I watch it. (Note: I can't get over how suitably giddy P'Jojo looks when watching them act).
Pairing Rating: [A FIERY ROLLERCOASTER] This pairing is all about peaks and troughs, ups and downs. But ultimately we see two people who truly complement each other and balance one another out.
Tumblr media
P'Jojo has a very distinctive voice in terms of direction, which really permeates in every element of the show. He had a clear vision and that intent translates. Stylistically, this was right up my street, and is very palatable for today's audience. From the visually dynamic sets to character styling, there's individuality but also cohesion. The music choices are superb. The opening and end credits were striking.
Editing: This show does some playful things with the way it edits, especially when it comes to montages. The 'interview' shots at the beginning of the series offer us an efficient insight into Mew's POV, but is not utilised again. At times these choices can feel experimental.
Music: Khaotung's OST track 'Let's Try' is a bonafide banger. Khao really is out here to prove his astounding range, as I had no idea this was him when I first heard it.
>>>
FINAL THOUGHTS: This series isn't one I've rewatched from start to finish since it's release - though I have returned to Firstkhao's scenes again and again. Rewatch value is always an interesting factor I like to ponder - especially the why. I think this is one of those shows where it's impact hits most on first watch, but doesn't pack as much punch a second time round. Some people hope there will be a Season 2, but I'm not sure if that would be a good idea, considering our characters have come to a comfortable conclusion in their arcs, and any further disturbance to their stories may feel unwarranted.
Tumblr media
(Disclaimer: These are just my own opinions. It goes without saying that one still can enjoy a show for all its successes as well as recognising its shortcomings).
36 notes · View notes
utilitycaster · 2 months
Note
Can you share your name examples? Please!
under a cut in case people feel like guessing or something
putting syllables together and they sound nice: literally almost any fantasy book that doesn't use modern names but like, off the top of my head: Essun from The Broken Earth Trilogy. Sabriel and Lirael from The Old Kingdom Trilogy. Shallan from the Stormlight Archives. The vast majority of women's names in ASOIAF that aren't too close to irl names. No shortage of names in Wheel of Time.
putting syllables together and they sound like arthuriana: Egwene (Wheel of Time) is the big one for me.
Slightly altered irl name: Bunch of names in ASOIAF notably Eddard and Alicent. Really common in actual play (Revvetha is sort of a joke but sort of not; Belizabeth).
Extremely apt character descriptor you know who you are: Kaladin of the Stormlight Archives. As a paladin stan I must stan and the character genuinely is great but like. c'mon man.
Mashup of irl names: Brennan Lee Mulligan does this EXTREMELY often most notably with Raphaniel.
Something meaningful in an irl language: SILAHA is a great example. Idk Dune probably did this.
Something meaningful in an elaborate self-created conlang: welcome to Lord of the Rings, an opportunity for Tolkien to take his conlangs for a test drive.
Something meaningful in a foreign language siri set alarm etc: self-explanatory. look to your left look to your right if no one at the D&D table used an Elvish Translator then it's bc they used the fantasy name generator for a different fantasy race.
IRL names not in common usage: I suppose it's not exclusively but The Locked Tomb does have Palamedes and this is also a Classic D&D Naming Strat.
This is Linda and she fights dragons: Robert Baratheon, whatever the fuck is going on in Dune, when D&D characters are named things like Kristen or Beauregard or Imogen or Ashton. Also obviously true in almost any Earth-set fantasy; I have a taste for like, regency/Napoleonic Wars-set fantasy novels and so people are just named things like Thomas and Catherine and they are worried about Their Place In Society but also they are wizards.
Series of complex and mysterious titles: The Man with the Thistledown Hair from Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell (speaking of normal-ass names in fantasy); The Emissary; The Man in Black. Often some kind of eldritch/otherworldly being but like, you could just decide that's your name in a D&D game. no one is stopping you.
Rigid Naming Conventions: offhand my problematic fave The Belgariad has some weird naming conventions (dryads all have names starting with X or, when softened into Tolnedran, Ce' as a prefix; acolytes of Aldur all have Bel- or Pol- prefixes to their names based on gender but the names themselves vary); the weird palindrome names in Stormlight Archives; The Vorkosigan Saga is sci fi and set in a future of our universe so many names are existing ones but the naming convention is often passing down the two grandfather's first names to the eldest son and other such things.
Pun or meme: again, D&D classic; Percival Friedrickstein Von Musel Klossowski De Rolo III, every Crown of Candy PC.
Fantasy name generator already covered. who knows how many people are using it. who knows what data set it uses.
Acronym: I believe this is what Tav is in BG3; This is also I believe where Thedas comes from.
Literally just a noun: Fjord, Keg; The Belgariad has characters who technically are going by codenames bc they are from The Spy Country but practically speaking I cannot actually recall what Silk's actual name is off the top of my head and I've read those books like 5 times and he's a major character. Shadowheart is i guess two nouns but it's the same principle.
43 notes · View notes
mildmayfoxe · 3 months
Note
big fan of your romance novel complaint posts (love to see a fellow hater living it up) but i’m also curious if there are any you would recommend? not looking for anything in particular, just would love to hear your thoughts as someone else with nitpicky reading habits and a taste for trash
ok hello. i left you hanging for a FULL week and for that i am sorry but i wanted to be able to have some time to sit down and type out a real answer to which the short version is YES of course there are several that i have enjoyed!! my disclaimer is that i almost solely read gay romance so if you are looking for lesbian or even straight reccs i don't have much for you (although i will put a couple at the end anyway). hopefully something in this list is interesting to you or at least interesting to someone else! links are mostly to goodreads. break bc i'm gonna write too much
-kj charles is one of my fave authors in this genre bc they're all pretty reliable and there's a ton of them. they're all historical fiction and usually there's at least one murder- she's good at keeping a plot going while developing a romance. often supernatural or magical elements. sometimes cults! i've read almost all of the books she's written and have enjoyed them all
-charlie adhara wrote a really incredible werewolf series that i loved, the first of which is the wolf at the door. this is one of the only series i've read which keeps the emotional stakes up through the whole thing & kept me interested in a relationship after it was established bc sooo many series get boring the second the leads get together. i actually read the first book of the spin-off series (a pack of lies) first which is technically possible but i don't recommend bc i was like "wow they're really throwing me in here. i love it" and then i read the first series and i was like "oh i was supposed to know all this stuff." but i actually liked the dynamic between that couple better and i'm suffering every day because the next one still doesn't come out til 2025 and i read it in 2022. also worth noting that this (the original series) is cops-ajacent (~federal special agents~) and one of the characters is really prejudiced at the beginning & imo doesn't have enough character growth before it's waved away but if you can ignore that it's really good. mysteries! werewolves!
-speaking of werewolves (i could suggest several but i'll keep it to two) tj klune's wolfsong ends up at the top of a lot of gay werewolf novel lists (i'm keeping tabs) and there's a good reason. i enjoyed it a lot. made me kind of sad which is always a good sign to me. the writing voice was very fresh and novel at first but i did find it a little grating by the end so i've put off starting the second book in the series (it's also about a different couple which was disappointing) but i will get around to it. i enjoy tj klune in general although his recent stuff has a very different vibe than this and lightning struck heart is very 2015 in a bad way imo
-bone rider by j fally is a standalone that really delighted me. the russian mob? aliens? vaguely western? possession? throuple? it's got it all. very fun
-ok speaking of westerns there's this other series called magic & steam (yes it's steampunk. sorry. it's very silly) that starts with the engineer. a federal agent is sent to a town to apprehend a ~madman engineer~ except he runs into an infamous outlaw in the process. and the outlaw is really sexy. and probably why i enjoyed the series so much. the series also keeps them apart a lot in a way that i enjoy- i love when things take a long time. it's ongoing so this is another one that i keep checking for updates on
-i've read a lot of stuff by nr walker and they tend to be VERY hit or miss for me but one of my faves is evolved which is almost pure smut. it's about a sex robot that gains sentience. what more do i need to say. she also wrote a three-book series about an amnesiac that made me cry cry cry. and her cowboy (australian rancher) series is pretty ok. i could go through a list and tell you which novels of hers aren't worth it and which ones are good; i've read most of them
-salt magic skin magic by lee welch was a big surprise to me. cool magic, good folklore, fairies in there too. historical. big kj charles vibes which makes sense bc she edited it. welch also wrote a book called seducing the sorcerer which i had more mixed feelings about but had magic in it that i think about OFTEN (the horses)- that one's about an imposing sorcerer and a rundown groom cum handyman. and they're in their FORTIES!!! 🥳🥳🥳 (i love when books are not about 23 year olds)
-another one with a magic system i enjoyed was magician by kl noone. this was the first book i read by this author and i liked it but generally i find their books are too "nice" for me. i'm in the middle of one right now that i started months and months ago that i keep trying to go back to and it's sooo rough for me. but this one and the twelfth enchantment are pretty ok
-emily tesh wrote a duology of silver in the wood and drowned country that i loved because i am suuuuch a sucker for a wild man/green man story. really good. haunting! evocative! kj charles has a green man story too which was actually the first thing i read of hers (spectred isle)
-i complained about the monsterfucker book i was reading a while back but despite that i will also recommend the series it's from: lily mayne's monstrous, which starts with soul eater. are they messy? yes. are they repetitive? yes. are the monsters usually disappointingly humanoid? yes. are a lot of them about the military? also yes. so we're starting off on a bad foot. but the world building is interesting and there's LOTS of kinds of monsters and most of them were pretty fun. the one i just read (#7) was the worst one of the bunch though imo. and i have problems with #6. but 1 2 and 5 were good
-ok i should do a quickfire round. honeytrap: about two enemy agents during the cold war. put it off for a long time bc i didn't love that but it takes place over a VERY long period of time which is always interesting to me. zero at the bone: about a hitman who needs to protect a witness to a mob hit. really strong start but fell off a bit in the middle to the end imo.
-you'll notice a lot of these have subgenres of like fantasy historical supernatural etc but here's some regular contemporaries. a lot of these are about sad guys bc those are my favorite. best laid plans: hardware store owner helps a guy fix his house. in the middle of somewhere: same author actually. guy moves to small town to work at a college. mr jingle bells: this is a christmas one. bad title. fake dating. part of the reason i think i liked it so much is because i expected it to be awful but it was actually pretty good. good emotional stakes. published 2021 but feels very 2014. ignore that part. work for it: i rated this five stars but actually don't remember much what it was like. i think they were both really sad which i love. give me big emotions and i eat them right up with a spoon. i should read it again
-OK now i've got some straight & lesbian options. talia hibbert's brown sisters series is good and cute. she also wrote work for it, above. the unhoneymooners is the first real Romance Novel that i read and it really surprised me because i had fun! previously i had kind of written off romance novels as not for me but this kicked off a reading habit that is still going strong (primarily reading romance novels). i read this in 2020 so it might not be as good as i remember. as for lesbian options olivia waite has a series that i enjoyed that's also historical, and a friend of mine really enjoyed delilah green doesn't care (but i haven't read that one myself). and while not really romances i will always be a sarah waters fan: you may recognize her as the author of fingersmith, which is the novel park chan-wook's movie the handmaiden is based on. if you haven't seen the movie or read the book i recommend both. her books are very dramatic lesbian historical fiction; they don't always have happy endings but they're all very good
ok i think that's the end! regular disclaimer that romance is generally not a genre notable for Good Writing so a lot of these are just things i had fun with or just stuck out in my memory for having fun conceits etc. i can't guarantee that any of these are actually good, especially because this is a list solely based on my own taste and bad memory. would love to hear anybody's thoughts and/or if anybody has recommendations for ME!!! this post took me over three hours to write! crazy!
24 notes · View notes
musicoftheheart · 20 days
Note
Fave Marauders song? ☣️
hi! okay, so im assuming you mean a song i associate with each marauder? (this is a long answer ahaha, i like to talk)
also, if you want me to do more of these for any other characters or any ships, let me know!! this was a lot of fun to think about and write <333
ill start with james. the first song (because i cannot just pick one) would have to be 'peace' by taylor swift. hes a bundle of energy, and he tends to act before he thinks (see: wand left on couch.) "[danger's] just around the corner darling, cause it lives in me. no i could never give you peace." but also hes a lover, and he would do anything for the people he cares for. "im a fire and ill keep your brittle heart warm if your cascade ocean wave blues come" etc. theres still that little bit of uncertainty in him though; "would it be enough if i could never give you peace?" its him.
similarly, though, i think of him when i hear 'epiphany' from the same album. idk if its because i associate it with the first wizarding war and therefore james, but i just- its him. it just is.
i also hc james to have some level of mental health struggles, whether it be anxiety, depression, or bipolar disorder. so, in my head, both 'talk too much' (specifically the ramble/bridge) and 'gemini moon' by reneé rapp scream james potter. i think 'gemini moon' would be something he'd try to hide relating to, because in his head hes supposed to be perfect, hes supposed to be a rock for everyone else. hes the golden boy of gryffindor tower, yknow. these also feel more like they relate to the modern/muggle aus i like to read though
on a similar note: 'mirrorball' by taylor swift. hes always putting on this show to make people smile, to help people, to make them laugh. he adapts to be what people need, but when he finally snaps, when everything just becomes too much, he doesnt just break - he shatters. "i know they said the end is near but im still on my tallest tiptoes" this could also relate to the war; he knows voldemort is targeting him, lily, and harry, but hes still trying to keep positive. "they called off the circus, burned the disco down" all the joy from hogwarts is gone because of the war but "im still trying everything to get you laughing at me" he wants to keep people smiling. he wants people to have hope.
also, although im trying to avoid ships, major shoutout to pretty much every jeremy shada song to exist, because theyre so james potter-coded regarding his love life and the way he loves people
alright, imma move onto sirius before i ramble too far. this first song ties a little into james though - 'seven' by taylor swift. specifically, james talking to sirius about his family and inviting him to live with the potters instead. have a listen and youll agree
still on his relationship with his family, sirius is definitely a 'family line' by conan gray sort of guy. he would scream it at the top of his lungs.
furthermore, sticking w conan gray, i love 'found heaven' as a sirius song, too. after spending so much of his life being told all the things wrong with him, only to discover his sexuality - yet another thing i think he'd have issues accepting about himself - he eventually does find that acceptance. "youll never get your mama's wedding ring. father always said you ruined everything. but you prayed, begged and prayed, heart unchanged" "dont be scared little child, you're no demon" "your heart is breaking as you leave that door. you never meant to start this holy war. but youre trapped, pack your bags, dont look back" just all of it. its him.
on a more positive note, though, i see 'boys & girls' by conan gray as his song too. again, im trying to keep away from talking about specific ships and focus on the individuals, but this works even more if you ship wolfstar. imagine remus singing this about sirius. as much as we all like to say remus is a cassanova of gryffindor, hes a lanky nerd covered in scars. he isnt typically/stereotypically "attractive", not like sirius. sirius, who is saught after by many, but never dares to look at his friend like that, because how could he? theyre friends, and thats all. right?
that leads nicely into remus. i dont have as many options to hand for remus as james and sirius, so ill just go through all that i can remember off the top of my head. most obviously: 'the view between villages' by noah kahan. i feel like i dont even need to explain this one. its all him. you could look at it from the beginning of poa when he returns to hogwarts, or you could look at it from when he goes back to hogwarts to fight in the final battle to ultimately die. either way, its him.
god okay i know i said i want to avoid ships but i just have to throw this in here. 'in the kitchen' by reneé rapp is so remus after he loses sirius, either to azkaban or the veil. give it a listen and tell me im wrong.
its a bit of a sad one, but 'the next right thing' from frozen 2 is kinda giving me remus vibes. like, especially after the first war, all his friends are dead, or traitors. and now dumblefuck is asking him to come back to hogwarts to teach his dead friends' son? what else was he to do but drag himself out of his misery and put harry first? he didnt have his friends left to fight for anymore, but he could still make a difference for harry.
'memories' by conan gray is also giving remus. i could see it being about sirius maybe coming to him after he escapes azkaban or after the prank, but i actually see it more as his thoughts after dumblefuck visits him to get him to teach at hogwarts. obv not every line of the song, but the main idea of it. "i wish that you would stay in my memories, but you show up today just to ruin things. i wanna put you in the past cause im traumatised, but youre not letting me do that"
that was... a much smaller amount of songs for remus than i thought i had. does anyone have any suggestions?
for peter, i had to do a little more thinking, honestly. 'i almost do' by taylor swift makes me think of him bc like, do you ever think peter considered trying to reach out to remus at all during those 12 years between james' death and sirius' escape from azkaban? i know it probably would not have gone well for him if he had but like... ive thought about it.
similarly, 'miss you' by conan gray. does peter have regrets about what he did? maybe. is he allowed to miss his friends after what he did? maybe. so much of this song does feel like what peter might have been thinking following the betrayal. "is it wrong to now decide i miss you?" yeah, maybe buddy.
but then maybe he wouldnt have, yknow. so my next thought was 'crossing the line' from tangled the series. its so incredibly peter & james coded (with james as rapunzel)
on a more fanon side of things, i think my answer would be 'bruises' by reneé rapp. if we're going with the whole thing where sirius especially, but the other marauders as a whole treat peter as lesser (i dont think thats canon, and honestly im not a huge fan of the hc either, but its still something i now associate w peter) then 'bruises' really captures how he'd feel. "all my friends make sweet fun of me...sure im down to be the joke, metaphorically though you could flip me inside out and it would show black purple and green" its his song if you hc this
finally, i put forward 'run' by taylor swift and ed sheeran. i want to think that, before turning to voldemort, peter tried to convince his loved ones to just escape the war. leave it for someone else to fight and die in. he wanted to survive, and he wanted his friends to survive too, if he could. ultimately, his friends wanted to stay. james and sirius had been wanting to join the order more than anything after they graduated, and remus felt he owed a debt, if nothing else. they werent going to leave or sacrifice their moral compass to save themselves. so peter ran, alone.
im going to leave it here for now, but again please feel free to ask for more characters or any ships!! i have songs for a couple other characters, i think, and a few ships, so ill do my best to answer what i can <33
17 notes · View notes
Text
Younger Siblings Tournament Bracket Reveal
A few things I want to mention before I reveal the bracket (and make the post really long because all the matchups will be listed in text):
Seeding of fictional characters in tumblr polls is inherently subjective. I did try to make it so that more popular characters/media would (most likely) face off against each other in later rounds, but I may be overestimating or underestimating the popularity of some characters/media, especially ones I'm not familiar with. There are some round 1 matchups that are probably a closer match but none of them are between the strongest candidates... I think.
The more niche characters will probably get obliterated in the first round as per Squimbus' Law. This is a tumblr poll and I do fully expect more popular characters to sweep, but that doesn't mean you can't encourage your friends to give your niche faves a fighting chance.
Also there are some matchups I literally just thought would be funny. Please don't take this too seriously.
I'm sorry BNHA fans.
(Preliminary Patch Notes 3/14: Swapped brackets 2 and 3, and brackets 19 and 21.)
Tumblr media
[Image description: A 64-person tournament bracket labeled "younger siblings tournament" with a smiley face. The top-left quarter is labeled "quarter A" and color-coded red, the bottom-left quarter is labeled "quarter B" and color-coded green, the top-right quarter is labeled "quarter C" and color-coded purple, and the bottom-right quarter is labeled "quarter D" and color-coded gold. The starting brackets are labeled 1-32 and are as listed below. End ID]
Quarter A:
Ritsu Kageyama (Mob Psycho 100) vs. Ame (Wolf Children)
Malo (The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess) vs. Cat Valentine (Victorious)
Danny Fenton (Danny Phantom) vs. Fern (Adventure Time)
Skeletor (Masters of the Universe) vs. Shuri (Marvel)
Ryotaro Nogami (Kamen Rider Den-O) vs. Princess Luna (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic)
Lilo Pelekai (Lilo & Stitch) vs. Sir Agravain (Arthurian Legend)
Dewey Wilkerson (Malcolm in the Middle) vs. Siobhan "Shiv" Roy (Succession)
Sasuke Uchiha (Naruto) vs. Razputin Aquato (Psychonauts)
Quarter B:
(9) Maya Fey (Ace Attorney) vs. Louie Duck (DuckTales)
(10) Falin Touden (Dungeon Meshi) vs. Saburo Yamada (Hypnosis Mic)
(11) Noelle Holiday (Deltarune) vs. Krel Tarron (Tales of Arcadia)
(12) Melinoë (Hades) vs. Han Yoohyun (The S-Classes That I Raised)
(13) Abel (The Bible) vs. Hiro Hamada (Big Hero 6)
(14) Lisa Simpson (The Simpsons) vs. Greg (Over the Garden Wall)
(15) Dante (Devil May Cry) vs. Alisaie Leveilleur (Final Fantasy XIV)
(16) Shoto Todoroki (My Hero Academia) vs. Kofuku (Real Life)
Quarter C:
(17) Luigi (Super Mario) vs. Genji Shimada (Overwatch)
(18) Yukio Okumura (Blue Exorcist) vs. Saki Tenma (Project Sekai)
(19) Fleabag (Fleabag) vs. Emerald Haywood (Nope)
(20) Sam Winchester (Supernatural) vs. Jiang Cheng (The Untamed)
(21) Nico Di Angelo (Percy Jackson) vs. Gaz Membrane (Invader Zim)
(22) Manny Heffley (Diary of a Wimpy Kid) vs. Jimmy "Saul Goodman" McGill (Better Call Saul)
(23) Sunny Baudelaire (A Series of Unfortunate Events) vs. Sunny (Omori)
(24) Miles "Tails" Prower (Sonic the Hedgehog) vs. Mugman (Cuphead)
Quarter D:
(25) Michelangelo Hamato (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) vs. The Knight (Hollow Knight)
(26) Vash the Stampede (Trigun) vs. Ruby Rose (RWBY)
(27) Sensei Wu (Lego Ninjago) vs. King Clawthorne (The Owl House)
(28) Dawn Summers (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) vs. Katara (Avatar: The Last Airbender)
(29) Jinx (Arcane) vs. Caduceus Clay (Critical Role)
(30) Damian Wayne (DC) vs. Alluka Zoldyck (Hunter x Hunter)
(31) Hop (Pokémon Sword and Shield) vs. Mirabel Madrigal (Encanto)
(32) Rhyme Bito (The World Ends With You) vs. Alphonse Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist)
Round 1 is ongoing! Matchups are linked (or if you prefer to scroll through the matchup posts, go to the "younger siblings tournament" tag on my blog)
268 notes · View notes