#one more like places with nationalized health care

[elljayvee]

I did a bunch of work on food access a few years back (I work in food systems generally, the access work was part of a particular project). We found in our outreach sessions that a major problem for people in our area was that, if they needed to use mass transit to shop, the cost of fares was a barrier. Was it the ONLY food access problem? No, of course not. Would it help if low-income people had access to reduced fares? OF. FUCKING. COURSE. both generally AND when they needed to food shop. Would it have been nice to make food access Not A Problem At All for everyone? Yes. Would it also have been nice to end up with free transit for low-income people instead of reduced? Also yes!

Did it still fucking help?

YES.

My biggest frustration with the left has always been the inability/unwillingness to work on making progress inside of the system while advocating for greater change.

I remember the first time I came to this realization.

I was nineteen, pregnant. We couldn’t afford to heat the house because we couldn’t afford the deposit to turn the gas on. It was miserably cold. The duplex we were renting was old and rickety and drafty. The window frames were messed up and there were cracks you could stick your finger through that were open to the elements.

Just, like, to give you an idea where we were financially. And this was better than we’d been doing before!

Anyway, I had recently started going to DSA meetings. And that month, they were talking about how a moderate democrat had successfully gotten a small increase in WIC benefits monthly. It came out to, like, $10 a month.

The members talking—mostly male, almost all doing decent—were scornful. The democrat should have pushed harder and gotten more, refused to accept anything until everyone else caved to their demands. I remember sitting there, quietly drinking the latte in the smallest size they had that I had bought with scrounged quarters, listening. Wishing it wasn’t held in an indie coffee shop because it was a luxury I really couldn’t afford, but it would be rude not to. Enjoying the coffee anyway.

I was one of the lucky ones who was getting that additional $10 a month through WIC. Even more exciting, we were now getting a voucher for the farmers’ market. I casually mentioned that WIC recipients would now be getting farmers’ market vouchers, too.

The guy who organized the meetings was a hard worker, passionate guy. Did something in tech.

He was like, “That’s the thing! These people don’t want farmers market vouchers. They want—” and he went on to describe a bunch of pie in the sky desires. That, yeah, sounded good.

But one. I was one of those people! A lot if the tamiles were super excited about it, myself included.

I had never been to a farmers’ market before. I tried arugula for the first time, a piece pulled from a bunch by the grower as he explained the flavor difference. I hadn’t known before then that different lettuce greens had different flavors, that it was more than just the texture and shape. I tried pesto, which delighted me. Goat cheese. I got three full pounds of strawberries for two dollars, since they were closing soon and the old man selling the berries got a kick out of me.

Anyway. It was like, you have a decent life. Not great but decent! The things that are life changing for me, for us… you already have.

The ten dollars at the grocery store made the difference between a meal of broken-noodles-with-some-half-horrible-pantry-scraps and a meal. It kept me full and healthy! And the additional farmers’ market voucher was world changing for me.

The democrat who worked for those things barely got them through. And it was means tested to hell and back. They weren’t able to get everything they wanted. But what they got made such a huge difference for me, for people like me.

[transmutationisms]

@annevbonny yeah so first of all there's the overt framing issue that this whole idea rests on the premise that eliminating fatness is both possible and good, as though like. fat people haven't existed prior to the ~industrial revolution~ lol

more granularly this theory relies on misinterpreting the causes for the link between poverty and fatness (which is real---they are correlated) so that fatness can be configured as a failure of eating choices and urban design, meaning ofc that the 'solution' to this problem is more socially hygienic, monitored, controlled communities where everybody has been properly educated into the proper affective enjoyment of spinach and bike riding, and no one is fat anymore and the labour force lives for longer and generates more value for employers

in truth one of the biggest mediating factors in the poverty-body weight link is food insecurity, because intermittent access to food tends to result in periods of under-nourishment followed by periods of compensatory eating with corresponding weight regain/overshoot (this is typical of weight trajectories in anyone refeeding after a period of starvation or under-eating, for any reason). so this is all to say that the suggestion that fatness is caused by access to 'unhealthy foods' is not only off base but extremely harmful; food insecurity is rampant globally. what people need is consistent access to food, and more of it!

and [loud obvious disclaimer voice] although i absolutely agree that food justice means access to a variety of foods with a variety of nutrient profiles, access to any calories at all is always better than access to none or too few. which is to say, there aren't 'healthy' or 'unhealthy' foods in isolation (all foods can belong in a varied, sufficient diet) and this is a billion times more true when we are talking about people struggling to consume enough calories in the first place.

relatedly, proponents of the 'obesogenic environment' theory often invoke the idea of 'hyperpalatable foods' or 'food addiction'---different ways of saying that people 'overeat' 'junk food' because it's too tasty (often with the bonus techno-conspiricism of "they engineer it that way"). again it's this idea that the problem is people eating the 'wrong' foods, now because the foods themselves are exerting some inexorable chemical pull over them.

this is inane for multiple reasons including the failure to deal with access issues and the fact that people who routinely, reliably eat enough in non-restrictive patterns (between food insecurity and encouragement to deliberately diet/restrict, this is very few people) don't even tend to 'overeat' energy-dense demonised foods in the first place. ie, there is no need to proscribe or limit 'junk food' or 'fast food' or 'empty calories' or whatever nonsense euphemism; again the solution to nutritionally unbalanced diets is to guarantee everyone access to sufficient food and a variety of different foods (and to stop encouraging the sorts of moralising food taboos that make certain foods 'out of bounds' and therefore more likely to provoke a subjective sense of loss of control in the first place lol)

but tbc, when i say "the solution to nutritionally unbalanced diets"---because these certainly can and do exist, particularly (again) amongst people subjected to food insecurity---i am NOT saying "the solution to fatness" because fatness is not something that will ever be eliminated from the human population. and here again we circle back to one of the fundamental fears that animates the 'obesogenic environment' myth, which is that fatness is a medical threat to the race/nation/national future. which is of course blatant biopolitics and is relying on massive assumptions about the health status of fat and thin people that are simply not borne out in the data, and that misinterpret the relationship between fatness and illness (for example, the extent to which weight stigma prevents fat people from receiving medical care, or the role of 'metabolic syndrome' in causing weight gain, rather than the other way around).

people are fat for many reasons, including "their bodies just look like that"; fatness is neither a disease in itself nor inherently indicative of ill health, nor is it eradicable anyway (and fundamentally, while all people should have access to health-protective social and economic conditions, health is not something that people 'owe' to anyone else anyway)

the 'obesogenic environment' is a liberal technocratic fantasy---a world in which fatness is a problem of individual consumption and social engineering, and is to be eliminated by clever policy and personal responsibility. it assumes your health is 1) directly caused and indicated by your weight, 2) something you owe to the capitalist state as part of the bargain that is 'citizenship', and 3) something you can learn to control if only you are properly educated by the medical authorities on the rules of nutrition (and secondarily exercise) science. it's a factual misinterpretation of everything we know about weight, health, diet, and wealth, and it fundamentally serves as a defense of the existing economic order: the problem isn't that capitalism structurally does not provide sufficient access to resources for any but the capitalist class---no, we just need a nicer and more functional capitalism where labourers have a greengrocer in the neighbourhood, because this is a discourse incapable of grappling with the material realities of food production and consumption, and instead reliant on configuring them in terms of affectivity ('food addiction') or knowledge (the idea that food-insecure people need to be more educated about nutrition)

there are some additional aspects here obviously like the idea that exercising more would make people thin (similar issues to the food arguments, physical activity can be great but the reasons people do or don't do it are actually complex and related to things like work schedules and exercise doesn't guarantee thinness in the first place) or fearmongering about 'endocrine disruptors' (real, but are extremely ill-defined as a category and are often just a way to appeal to ideas of 'naturalness' and the vague yet pressing harms of 'chemicals', and which are also not shown to single-handedly 'cause' fatness, a normal state of existence for the human body) but this is most often an argument about food ime.

[dandelionsresilience]

Good News - June 8-14

Like these weekly compilations? Tip me at $Kaybarr1735! And if you tip me and give me a way to contact you, at the end of the month I'll send you a link to all of the articles I found but didn't use each week!

1. Rare foal born on estate for first time in 100 years

“The Food Museum at Abbot's Hall in Stowmarket, Suffolk, is home to a small number of Suffolk Punch horses - a breed considered critically endangered by the Rare Breeds Survival Trust. A female foal was born on Saturday and has been named Abbots Juno to honour the last horse born at the museum in 1924. [...] Juno is just one of 12 fillies born so far this year in the country and she could potentially help produce more of the breed in the future.”

2. The cement that could turn your house into a giant battery

“[Scientists] at Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) have found a way of creating an energy storage device known as a supercapacitor from three basic, cheap materials – water, cement and a soot-like substance called carbon black. [... Supercapacitators] can charge much more quickly than a lithium ion battery and don't suffer from the same levels of degradation in performance. [... Future applications of this concrete might include] roads that store solar energy and then release it to recharge electric cars wirelessly as they drive along a road [... and] energy-storing foundations of houses.”

3. New road lights, fewer dead insects—insect-friendly lighting successfully tested

“Tailored and shielded road lights make the light source almost invisible outside the illuminated area and significantly reduces the lethal attraction for flying insects in different environments. [...] The new LED luminaires deliver more focused light, reduce spill light, and are shielded above and to the side to minimize light pollution. [... In contrast,] dimming the conventional lights by a factor of 5 had no significant effect on insect attraction.”

4. When LGBTQ health is at stake, patient navigators are ready to help

“[S]ome health care systems have begun to offer guides, or navigators, to get people the help they need. [... W]hether they're just looking for a new doctor or taking the first step toward getting gender-affirming care, "a lot of our patients really benefit from having someone like me who is there to make sure that they are getting connected with a person who is immediately going to provide a safe environment for them." [... A navigator] also connects people with LGBTQ community organizations, social groups and peer support groups.”

5. Tech company to help tackle invasive plant species

“Himalayan balsam has very sugary nectar which tempts bees and other pollinators away from native plants, thereby preventing them from producing seed. It outcompetes native plant species for resources such as sunlight, space and nutrients. [...] The volunteer scheme is open to all GWT WilderGlos users who have a smartphone and can download the Crowdorsa app, where they can then earn up to 25p per square meter of Balsam removed.”

6. [Fish & Wildlife] Service Provides Over $14 Million to Benefit Local Communities, Clean Waterways and Recreational Boaters

“The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service is distributing more than $14 million in Clean Vessel Act grants to improve water quality and increase opportunities for fishing, shellfish harvests and safe swimming in the nation’s waterways. By helping recreational boaters properly dispose of sewage, this year’s grants will improve conditions for local communities, wildlife and recreational boaters in 18 states and Guam.”

7. Bornean clouded leopard family filmed in wild for first time ever

“Camera traps in Tanjung Puting National Park in Indonesian Borneo have captured a Bornean clouded leopard mother and her two cubs wandering through a forest. It's the first time a family of these endangered leopards has been caught on camera in the wild, according [to] staff from the Orangutan Foundation who placed camera traps throughout the forest to learn more about the elusive species.”

8. Toy library helps parents save money 'and the planet'

“Started in 2015 by Annie Berry, South Bristol's toy library aims to reduce waste and allow more children access to more - and sometimes expensive - toys. [...] Ms Berry partnered with the St Philips recycling centre on a pilot project to rescue items back from landfill, bringing more toys into the library. [...] [P]eople use it to support the environment, take out toys that they might not have the space for at home or be able to afford, and allow children to pick non-gender specific toys.”

9. Chicago Receives $3M Grant to Inventory Its Trees and Create Plan to Manage City’s Urban Forest

“The Chicago Park District received a $1.48 million grant [“made available through the federal Inflation Reduction Act”] to complete a 100% inventory of its estimated 250,000 trees, develop an urban forestry management plan and plant 200 trees in disadvantaged areas with the highest need. As with the city, development of the management plan is expected to involve significant community input.”

10. Strong Public Support for Indigenous Co-Stewardship Plan for Bears Ears National Monument

“[The NFW has a] plan to collaboratively steward Bears Ears National Monument to safeguard wildlife, protect cultural resources, and better manage outdoor recreation. The plan was the result of a two-year collaboration among the five Tribes of the Bears Ears Inter-Tribal Coalition and upholds Tribal sovereignty, incorporates Traditional Ecological Knowledge, and responsibly manages the monument for hunting, fishing, and other outdoor recreation while ensuring the continued health of the ecosystem.”

June 1-7 news here | (all credit for images and written material can be found at the source linked; I don’t claim credit for anything but curating.)

[covid-safer-hotties]

I want to ask you this in good faith-- at what point do you think we can "stop worrying" about covid? Is there a particular statistical benchmark or qualitative indicator that you believe will show the covid pandemic is over?

I'm curious because you've responded to multiple people pointing out that the death toll & long covid metrics are lower than ever essentially saying that isn't enough to stop caring. So in your view, what is?

The benchmarks professionals have listed throughout the pandemic have yet to be met. If we could hit a single one, that would sure be nice. I'd stop worrying about covid if we could hit about 20,000 infections a week during a seasonal peak with reasonalble vaccine uptake (~70٪ or higher) of a vaccine that provides both mucosal and sterilizing immunity at reasonable levels. We're averaging around 20,000 infections a day in the 3-4 valleys we get a year right now, and that's without widespread wastewater testing from coast to coast and extremely low lab testing, so we know that those cases are an undercount. Not even 18% of Americans got the latest booster this fall, and the current vaccines neither induce mucosal immunity nor provide decent levels of sterilizing immunity (vaccinated people can act as unwitting asymptotic carriers of the virus) and (especially mRNA) vaccine efficacy drops rapidly after an antibody titre peak at around 2 months post vaccination. Current expert estimates for xmas day show us hitting more than 1,000,000 infections a day. A million infections a day would only take the national level into the CDC's new "medium" category. It's higher than both the Alpha and Beta waves. Of they were pandemic, so is this one. To act otherwise is to bury one's head in the sand and go "LA LA LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU" and that is our current public health response. Even if covid's death rate remains ~1%, that's 1% of a minimum ~20,000 a day even when we're not in a peak. One in five of each of those cases will develop lingering viral disease that mirrors HIV in its viral persistence and immune damage. If any of these things I mentioned can be reasonalbly addressed and substantially lessened, and these waves stop happening globally every 2 to 4 months, we'll stop being in a pandemic. If the government stops stifling data collection and acting like public health is a personal choice, I'll relax just a bit, because then I could actually do a risk assessment and trust that my community has mitigations in place like air filtration, masked staff, daily tests for staff, etc.

The death toll isn't the only metric to look at, and those deaths shouldn't be dismissed just because we're no longer stuffing corpses into reefer trailers. Each infection is a threat to someone's life and health in the long term, and we're refusing to look at that reality and adapt. Ignorance and bluster are not a public health response, and y'all should be pissed that's what the government is doing, not going out for mimosas even though "I've had a 'really bad cold for 5 days'."

The effects are cumulative and ever growing. To act like those effects just dissappear or don't matter is eugenics.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

No, “convenience” isn’t the problem

I'm touring my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me in CHICAGO (Apr 17), Torino (Apr 21) Marin County (Apr 27), Winnipeg (May 2), Calgary (May 3), Vancouver (May 4), and beyond!

Using Amazon, or Twitter, or Facebook, or Google, or Doordash, or Uber doesn't make you lazy. Platform capitalism isn't enshittifying because you made the wrong shopping choices.

Remember, the reason these corporations were able to capture such substantial market-share is that the capital markets saw them as a bet that they could lose money for years, drive out competition, capture their markets, and then raise prices and abuse their workers and suppliers without fear of reprisal. Investors were chasing monopoly power, that is, companies that are too big to fail, too big to jail, and too big to care:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/04/teach-me-how-to-shruggie/#kagi

The tactics that let a few startups into Big Tech are illegal under existing antitrust laws. It's illegal for large corporations to buy up smaller ones before they can grow to challenge their dominance. It's illegal for dominant companies to merge with each other. "Predatory pricing" (selling goods or services below cost to prevent competitors from entering the market, or to drive out existing competitors) is also illegal. It's illegal for a big business to use its power to bargain for preferential discounts from its suppliers. Large companies aren't allowed to collude to fix prices or payments.

But under successive administrations, from Jimmy Carter through to Donald Trump, corporations routinely broke these laws. They explicitly and implicitly colluded to keep those laws from being enforced, driving smaller businesses into the ground. Now, sociopaths are just as capable of starting small companies as they are of running monopolies, but that one store that's run by a colossal asshole isn't the threat to your wellbeing that, say, Walmart or Amazon is.

All of this took place against a backdrop of stagnating wages and skyrocketing housing, health, and education costs. In other words, even as the cost of operating a small business was going up (when Amazon gets a preferential discount from a key supplier, that supplier needs to make up the difference by gouging smaller, weaker retailers), Americans' disposable income was falling.

So long as the capital markets were willing to continue funding loss-making future monopolists, your neighbors were going to make the choice to shop "the wrong way." As small, local businesses lost those customers, the costs they had to charge to make up the difference would go up, making it harder and harder for you to afford to shop "the right way."

In other words: by allowing corporations to flout antimonopoly laws, we set the stage for monopolies. The fault lay with regulators and the corporate leaders and finance barons who captured them – not with "consumers" who made the wrong choices. What's more, as the biggest businesses' monopoly power grew, your ability to choose grew ever narrower: once every mom-and-pop restaurant in your area fires their delivery drivers and switches to Doordash, your choice to order delivery from a place that payrolls its drivers goes away.

Monopolists don't just have the advantage of nearly unlimited access to the capital markets – they also enjoy the easy coordination that comes from participating in a cartel. It's easy for five giant corporations to form conspiracies because five CEOs can fit around a single table, which means that some day, they will:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/18/cursed-are-the-sausagemakers/#how-the-parties-get-to-yes

By contrast, "consumers" are atomized – there are millions of us, we don't know each other, and we struggle to agree on a course of action and stick to it. For "consumers" to make a difference, we have to form institutions, like co-ops or buying clubs, or embark on coordinated campaigns, like boycotts. Both of these tactics have their place, but they are weak when compared to monopoly power.

Luckily, we're not just "consumers." We're also citizens who can exercise political power. That's hard work – but so is organizing a co-op or a boycott. The difference is, when we dog enforcers who wield the power of the state, and line up behind them when they start to do their jobs, we can make deep structural differences that go far beyond anything we can make happen as consumers:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/18/administrative-competence/#i-know-stuff

We're not just "consumers" or "citizens" – we're also workers, and when workers come together in unions, they, too, can concentrate the diffuse, atomized power of the individual into a single, powerful entity that can hold the forces of capital in check:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/10/an-injury-to-one/#is-an-injury-to-all

And all of these things work together; when regulators do their jobs, they protect workers who are unionizing:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/06/goons-ginks-and-company-finks/#if-blood-be-the-price-of-your-cursed-wealth

And strong labor power can force cartels to abandon their plans to rig the market so that every consumer choice makes them more powerful:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/01/how-the-writers-guild-sunk-ais-ship/

And when consumers can choose better, local, more ethical businesses at competitive rates, those choices can make a difference:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/10/view-a-sku/

Antimonopoly policy is the foundation for all forms of people-power. The very instant corporations become too big to fail, jail or care is the instant that "voting with your wallet" becomes a waste of time.

Sure, choose that small local grocery, but everything on their shelves is going to come from the consumer packaged-goods duopoly of Procter and Gamble and Unilever. Sure, hunt down that local brand of potato chips that you love instead of P&G or Unilever's brand, but if they become successful, either P&G or Unilever will buy them out, and issue a press release trumpeting the purchase, saying "We bought out this beloved independent brand and added it to our portfolio because we know that consumers value choice."

If you're going to devote yourself to solving the collective action problem to make people-power work against corporations, spend your precious time wisely. As Zephyr Teachout writes in Break 'Em Up, don't miss the protest march outside the Amazon warehouse because you spent two hours driving around looking for an independent stationery so you could buy the markers and cardboard to make your anti-Amazon sign without shopping on Amazon:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/29/break-em-up/#break-em-up

When blame corporate power on "laziness," we buy into the corporations' own story about how they came to dominate our lives: we just prefer them. This is how Google explains away its 90% market-share in search: we just chose Google. But we didn't, not really – Google spends tens of billions of dollars every single year buying up the search-box on every website, phone, and operating system:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task

Blaming "laziness" for corporate dominance also buys into the monopolists' claim that the only way to have convenient, easy-to-use services is to cede power to them. Facebook claims it's literally impossible for you to carry on social relations with the people that matter to you without also letting them spy on you. When we criticize people for wanting to hang out online with the people they love, we send the message that they need to choose loneliness and isolation, or they will be complicit in monopoly.

The problem with Google isn't that it lets you find things. The problem with Facebook isn't that it lets you talk to your friends. The problem with Uber isn't that it gets you from one place to another without having to stand on a corner waving your arm in the air. The problem with Amazon isn't that it makes it easy to locate a wide variety of products. We should stop telling people that they're wrong to want these things, because a) these things are good; and b) these things can be separated from the monopoly power of these corporate bullies:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/08/divisibility/#technognosticism

Remember the Napster Wars? The music labels had screwed over musicians and fans. 80 percent of all recorded music wasn't offered for sale, and the labels cooked the books to make it effectively impossible for musicians to earn out their advances. Napster didn't solve all of that (though they did offer $15/user/month to the labels for a license to their catalogs), but there were many ways in which it was vastly superior to the system it replaced.

The record labels responded by suing tens of thousands of people, mostly kids, but also dead people and babies and lots of other people. They demanded an end to online anonymity and a system of universal surveillance. They wanted every online space to algorithmically monitor everything a user posted and delete anything that might be a copyright infringement.

These were the problems with the music cartel: they suppressed the availability of music, screwed over musicians, carried on a campaign of indiscriminate legal terror, and lobbied effectively for a system of ubiquitous, far-reaching digital surveillance and control:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/02/nonbinary-families/#red-envelopes

You know what wasn't a problem with the record labels? The music. The music was fine. Great, even.

But some of the people who were outraged with the labels' outrageous actions decided the problem was the music. Their answer wasn't to merely demand better copyright laws or fairer treatment for musicians, but to demand that music fans stop listening to music from the labels. Somehow, they thought they could build a popular movement that you could only join by swearing off popular music.

That didn't work. It can't work. A popular movement that you can only join by boycotting popular music will always be unpopular. It's bad tactics.

When we blame "laziness" for tech monopolies, we send the message that our friends have to choose between life's joys and comforts, and a fair economic system that doesn't corrupt our politics, screw over workers, and destroy small, local businesses. This isn't true. It's a lie that monopolists tell to justify their abuse. When we repeat it, we do monopolists' work for them – and we chase away the people we need to recruit for the meaningful struggles to build worker power and political power.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/12/give-me-convenience/#or-give-me-death

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

[masqueradereveler21]

Hogwarts Legacy Character Sheet - Gwendolen Hughes (EDITED/REVISED)

General Information

Full Name: Gwendolen Eira Hughes

Nicknames: Gwen, The Hero of Hogwarts, The New Fifth Year, Troll Slayer

Gender: Female

Date of Birth: April 26th, 1875

Zodiac Sign: Taurus

Personality Type (MBTI): INTJ - The Architect

Species: Human

Blood Status: Unregistered/Muggleborn (Presumed)

Alignment: Chaotic Good

Nationality: Welsh

House: Slytherin

Wand: Fir Wood, Phoenix Feather, 12 1/2”, Rigid

Patronus: Stoat

Boggart: The mutilated corpse of Professor Fig; later on changes to Theophilus Harlow

Amortentia: Bread pudding, wax candles, old books, fresh linen

Physical Appearance

Hair Colour & Style: Black; occasionally wears down but is most often seen sporting it braided or in a ponytail.

Eye Colour: Grey

Skin Tone: Olive with golden undertones

Height: 167cm (5’6”)

Weight: 55kg (121 lbs)

Clothing Style: Neat and presentable; favors skirts, ruffled blouses, vests, and heeled boots. Almost never wears her robes. Black painted fingernails.

Personality

Positive Traits: Adaptable, determined, loyal, resilient, compassionate, curious, diligent

Neutral Traits: Independent, reserved, ambitious, rational, observant, competitive

Negative Traits: Arrogant, cunning, stubborn, sarcastic, defiant

Strengths: Capable of thinking outside the box and extremely quick-witted

Weaknesses: Thinks she knows what’s best and struggles to let people in

Likes: Cats, Summoner’s Court, Quidditch, organization, leadership, exploring the highlands, reading, Wizard’s Chess

Dislikes: Spiders, Gobstone’s, dugbogs, failure, laziness, clutter, singing in front of people, dancing

Background and Family

Gwendolen Eira Hughes was born on April 26th, 1875, in Swansea, South Wales, to a mother and father of unknown wizard of heritage. The details of her past are unsure; a carriage accident in her childhood tragically took the lives of her parents and left her with amnesia, leaving doctors and police with only documents to help piece her identity together. Her mother was an English woman named Alice Hedera while her father, Meilyr Hughes, was Welsh. After the accident, Gwen was placed in a Catholic convent where she was given an education but subjected to verbal, mental, and occasionally physical abuse. As she grew older, the convent began placing her into homes with the hope of adopting her out but she was returned each time due to her “poor behavior” and attitude. One of the families she lived with, the Trahernes, began physically abusing her which caused her magic to emerge. In a fit of anger, she caused ivy to grow throughout the entire house, damaging it and leaving the Trahernes with painful rashes. She was promptly returned to the convent and shortly after was visited by Professor Eleazar Fig.

After the events of Repository battle, Gwen’s mental health took a steep decline. The guilt and trauma she felt regarding the deaths of Professor Fig, Lodgok, and many more became too much to bear. She isolated herself within the Room of Requirement until Professor Matilda Weasley coaxed her out and comforted her during the last semester of the school year. After some consideration, Professor Weasley offered to become Gwen’s legal guardian so that she did not have to return to the convent. Gwen was initially hesitant to accept the offer, on account of her previous experiences living with adoptive families, but she eventually accepted after some convincing from Ominis Gaunt. It took a while for both of them to adjust to their new roles; Weasley did not want to overstep her boundaries but also wanted to make sure Gwen was being taken care of and provided for. Gwen kept Professor Weasley at arms length, waiting for the day it became too much and she would give up on her. But with time Gwen came to view Professor Weasley in a more maternal light (the feeling was mutual on Matilda’s end).

Biological Father: Meilyr Hughes (Deceased)

Biological Mother: Alice Hedera (Deceased)

Guardian/Adoptive Parent: Matilda Weasley

Adoptive Uncles: Graham Weasley, Phillip Weasley,

Adoptive Aunts: Dorothy Weasley (née Button), Lydia Weasley (née Hawthorne)

Adoptive Cousins: Theodore Weasley, Oscar Weasley, Garreth Weasley, Florence Weasley, Millicent Weasley, Francis Weasley, Edmund Weasley

Relationships

Love Interest: Ominis Gaunt/Sebastian Sallow…ehh its complicated…

Best Friends: Natsai Onai, Poppy Sweeting, Garreth Weasley, Imelda Reyes, Amit Thakkar

Acquaintances: Nerida Roberts, Grace Pinch-Smedley, Lucan Brattleby, Isaac Cooper, Adelaide Oakes

Rivals: Leander Prewett, Charlotte Morrison, Samantha Dale

Enemies: Ranrok, Victor Rookwood, Theophilus Harlow, Ashwinders

Pets: Vivarium beasts, eleven cats, a barn owl named Minerva

Inspirations

• Katniss Everdeen - The Hunger Games

• Annabeth Chase - Percy Jackson series

• Kat Stratford - 10 Things I Hate About You

• Raven - Teen Titans

• Mikasa Ackerman - Attack on Titan

• Beth Harmon - The Queen’s Gambit

• Emma Woodhouse - Emma

• Artwork done by the incredible @millyillus •

[olderthannetfic]

already seeing boneheads who don't read anything otw puts out "trump is gonna ban ao3 now" and i feel like i have several issues with this: 1. project 2025 may want to ban porn, but that's always been an uphill battle in the U.S. because of the first amendment, and there is going to be a lot of legal opposition. 2. the main legislation they're worried about, the comstock act, is going to be used to restrict mifepristone, not porn probably, and even then it only regulates obscenity "sent through the mail" because it's from the 1880s or something 3. the otw owns their own servers and if there was a real threat, would probably just be able to decamp them to another country 4. man, i wish this was the thing i was most concerned about now! so much is going to go south in this country, from trans rights to reproductive rights to our basic health care if RFK jr. gets the power to restrict vaccines and takes fluoride out of our water. i know people here who were looking to get pregnant and are now delaying it because they're terrified of a national abortion ban, since these laws are interpreting a D&C to take care of a miscarriage as "abortion." ukraine and gaza are fucked. it's not that i don't care about fanfiction and more broadly about free speech; i'm a donor to the otw. i've always been adamantly against any restrictions on obscenity, and fanfiction is a lot of how i'm getting through these terrible times. but it's like, when someone never posts about politics except "oh no they might ban ao3!" i'm just like god i wish i were you, without real problems lol

--

Yuuup. AO3 will almost certainly be fine in the short term (and in the long term, we should always back things up multiple places).

I also feel like... yes, the majority of my friends and many people on tumblr are in the US, but tumblr is also a highly international space. I'm sure there's someone living in far more of a hellhole than the immediate future US lurking here, and they may not even be in one of the places that this election will very directly and immediately affect.

I wish people would have some perspective, both because it can give us a good idea of what we have to most especially fight against but also because things are not as apocalyptic as some people seem to believe.

[dark-frosted-heart]

When the Holy Beast Falls - Azel

An “If you were lovers” story. As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this

If Prince Azel and I were lovers…

Sometimes the Living God of Tanzanite would visit the befriended nation Benitoite.

On those occasions, he’d always have me go with him.

I’d never hear something cute like “I’ll miss you” from the two-faced god who apparently brought me along just to push me around.

But I know his true intentions.

--

Emma: Prince Azel, I’m back. 

Azel: You’re late.

Emma: I brought everything you asked me to buy since you can’t go into town, so please forgive me.

Azel: That’s not the issue.

Prince Azel, who waited by the entrance, took the packages from me.

However, it didn’t seem like he was considering the packages and studied me.

Emma: …Are you hurt?

Azel: You can see I’m not.

Emma: Then what is it?

Azel: You’ve kept me waiting because you’ve been having fun in town.

Emma: H-how did you know? Is this God’s power— 

Azel: It’s all over your face.

(I guess I was grinning)

At my honest confession, Prince Azel pinched my cheek.

Azel: You got some nerve. I’ve been waiting for you to come back—

Emma: You’ve been waiting? For me?

Azel: …Don’t get the wrong idea. I asked you to get something for me.

Emma: That’s too bad. I thought if you were waiting for me, I’d rush back the next time.

Azel: Hurry back even if I’m not waiting. That’s a debtor’s responsibility. I’ll add this late fee to your debt.

Emma: Is that okay? The more debt you add, the more you won’t be able to let me go.

Azel: …You’re getting defiant.

(You’re so awkward, truly)

With a grim look on his face, Prince Azel turned his back on me and placed items he had me get on the table.

He went to check its contents, but his hand immediately stopped.

Azel: Emma…What is this?

Emma: It’s cute, isn’t it? I made a stop along the way to buy it.

Prince Azel held Benitoite’s popular “Living God doll” in his trembling hands.

It was a small doll in Prince Azel’s likeness that was said to bring many blessings, including luck with money, love, health, etc.

(It took me a while to buy it since there as a line)

Before he could throw it against the wall, I snatched the doll from Prince Azel’s hands and held it dearly.

Emma: I bought this separately from the money you gave me. I’m not giving it to you.

Azel: Get rid of things that aren’t wanted or needed.

Emma: I refuse. He’s cute, isn’t he?

Azel: Cute?! I think you mean repulsive.

I moved the doll out of Prince Azel’s reach as he tried to steal it back and stepped away from him.

Emma: Don’t worry, I’ll take good care of it.

Azel: No one’s telling you to take care of it. I'm telling you to throw it away.

Emma: Throw away my beloved Prince Azel? I could never.

Azel [polite]: …I see, I see. Even with the real God present, you chose the doll and casted me aside. How cruel…This is a slight toward God. This blasphemy deserves divine punishment.

(Ah—)

Prince Azel deliberately covered his face with his hands and began sobbing.

I knew it was a trap, but it hurt my conscience to ignore him.

Emma: That’s not it. However, with this doll, I can be with Prince Azel even when I’m out running errands. It’s my way of showing how much I love you.

The instant I approached the god to butter him up, Prince Azel stopped his crocodile tears, took the doll from me, and tossed it into some corner of the room. 

Emma: Ah! That’s cruel—Mn?!

My eyes widened when he stopped my protest with a kiss.

Azel: Who’s the cruel one here? Cheater.

Emma: …Even though it’s a puppet of you.

Azel: If you want my blessings so much, I’ll give it to you. You’ll have to deal with it.

A large hand grabbed my chin and our lips met again.

The kisses of a holy, unrelated god were always so greedy, greedily exploring deep inside that it made you feel like you were going to fall.

(Why is every kiss so lewd…)

Even when I nipped his lip to tell him he was going too far, the two-faced god didn’t stop and instead started tickling my ear.

Emma: Mm…Mmm!

Azel: Don’t need the doll anymore? That’s wonderful.

Emma: Wro…ah

The fingers that were tickling my ear slid down my neck and under the collar of my blouse.

I hastily grabbed the hand that was going to defile me and looked into his mysterious, starry eyes.

Emma: I can’t return to my room anymore, can I?

Azel [polite]: A message from God. You should not be alone tonight for there are bad omens.

Emma: …A lot of good things happened in town though?

Azel [polite]: It will happen, and it will surely be a misfortune.

Emma: Specifically…

Azel [polite]: Divination is an ambiguous thing. You won’t know until it happens.

Emma: Then let’s test out if Prince Azel’s divination is really correct.

Azel: Why would you do that? Are you stupid?

He cupped my cheeks and squished them.

Emma: Because lately, you’ve been saying the same thing. That when I’m alone, misfortune, bad luck, or a disaster will happen to me… So I thought I’d try it out just once.

Azel: Being fearless isn’t good. God’s words are absolute, so you must heed His warnings.

Emma: I get it Prince Azel. You just really want us to be together, don’t you?

Azel: ……I didn’t say that.

(You’re so easy to read)

Azel: I don’t care if you’re here or not. I prefer being alone.

Emma: Then— 

When I tried to shake his hands off and turn away, he hugged me tight.

Azel: You don’t believe in God’s good will?

Emma: You just need to be honest and say that you want me with you.

Azel: Aren’t you the one that wants to be with me?

Emma: If I’m the only one that wants this, then I’ll only bother you so I’ll head back to my room—

Azel: Try to go back if you can.

(Ugh…He’s so strong that I can’t shake him off!)

Even after saying all this, Prince Azel still won’t admit it.

But when I turned to look at him, we kissed for a short moment.

Azel: Ah…

It seemed like he didn’t mean to and his brows furrowed.

(He never wants to admit it, but…)

Emma: You truly do love me, Prince Azel.

Azel: Don’t be so conceited.

A blush spread across his grim face.

(...God’s blessing was real)

(Because it’s possible to make Prince Azel look like this)

With a dramatic sigh, Prince Azel rested his forehead on my shoulder.

Azel: What am I even doing?

Emma: It's love.

Azel: No. I’m in no way in love with you. Damn it…

(There’s still a long way to go, but I’ll definitely get it out of him one day)

(An “I love you” from Prince Azel)

[webshooterrr9]

Dating Ushijima Wakatoshi as the Club Manager

Headcanons + fic for male!reader

Commission for @crashgrav1ty

w.c: 2k

content warning: none!, fluff, cheesy highschool romance with ushiwaka

Headcanons:

I feel like Ushijima would be a soft dom when dating you, not like in a sexual way, but in a romantic way. He’s just so kind and smart and he would be so gently protective of you. He would pull you closer by the waist if you were walking through a crowded area, not to turn you on, just to make sure he doesn’t lose you. He would 100% be the one to walk on the outside of the sidewalk, he follows the sidewalk rule by heart.

He would also be an incredible listener. Ushijima is a very quiet guy and I don’t think that would change when he’s with you, but if you’re a big talker that’s a good thing. He’d sit there and listen to you yap with a small smile on his face, just admiring the gleam in your eyes when you talk about your little anime crushes and current video games you enjoy. He’s lowkey very oblivious to any fandom culture, but he’d let you chat about the drama all you want.

As far as volleyball goes, he always wants to impress you. Which isn’t hard, given that he’s one of the top three hitters in the nation, but whatever. He’s always giving it his all during practice and at games because he knows you’re watching. I think he took very good care of his health before you started dating, but after you started dating and became the club manager, he was taking any opportunity he could to hydrate and stretch - because he knew that meant that he could be next to you, even if you don’t talk. He loves just holding you after games, silently hugging you close to him and resting his head on top of yours. Ushijima would stay like that forever if he could.

As far as PDA goes, I don’t think he’d be super into it, but not necessarily against it. I think it would mostly be just small displays of affection like hand holding. As a guy who doesn’t say many words, I strongly believe that his love language is physical touch and gifts. Ushijima would leave cute little notes on your desk, sometimes with nothing more than a smiley face and a heart, and he’d share his lunch with you everyday. You’d never be lonely at school, and he’d always help you with homework that you struggle with.

Fic:

Today is the big day! Well, not really. It’s just another practice game against some other school in Miyagi - but still! Even if it’s not a part of an official tournament, you were always excited to see your boyfriend do what he loved most.

Ushijima holds your hand in his as you two walk through the hallways. Your last class, Art History, just ended and now you’re both heading to the locker room to get ready for the game. He doesn’t say much, but you can see in the quick glances he keeps giving you that Ushi is very happy that you’re here with him. You don’t always make it to practice games due to family stuff, so he’s excited to know that you’ll be there to support him - even if he doesn’t do a good job at showing it.

“Hey, Waki?” you say, turning your head up towards his. His ears perk up at the nickname and he turns to look back at you while the two of you walk. “Do you think we’re gonna do good today?”

He pauses for a moment to think. “I assume so. Nobody on the team is injured.” he turns his gaze back to the direction in which you’re walking, but he’s still listening to you. “Why do you ask? Do you think we’re gonna do bad?”

“No, no! That’s not what I’m saying.” you quickly defend, waving your non-held-hand around. “You just seem a little down, that’s all.”

“Down?”

“Yeah. Down as in sad, not as in syndrome.”

“Oh,” he replies in that same monotone voice as usual. “I didn’t realize I appeared that way, my apologies.”

You two enter the locker room, and he lets go of your hand for a brief second to open the door, immediately returning it to its rightful place after you two have entered. “No need to apologize, I just want to make sure you’re okay is all.”

“I’m alright. Don’t worry.”

You both head over to your lockers, which are conveniently next to each other. Your eyes wander to the floor as he changes from his school uniform into his practice clothes. Even though you’ve been dating for a few months now, you’re still shy about changing. Ushijima sees you avoiding his gaze and lets out a small laugh, speeding up the process of putting his new clothes on so that you don’t have to be awkward for any longer.

Once he’s done changing, he puts a hand on your shoulder to signal that it’s okay to look. “Hey.” he says, trying to get your attention. You look up at Ushiwaka, and your cheeks flush when you see him. Maybe it’s the way he’s towering over you, or maybe it’s the quiet confidence he exudes, but something about him is just so appealing to you. Handsome. That’s the only way to describe him. His short hair is neatly styled with hazel eyes softly looking into yours. There’s a gentle smirk on his face, one that would be missed by anyone but you.

“Yeah?” you ask, trying to be nonchalant. I mean yeah, you’re dating, but you still don’t want him to know that you’re crushing on him hard. Is it even possible to crush on your boyfriend? Or is that just love? Love. Woah. Big word. Not yet.

“I was wondering if maybe, after the game, you wanted to go get some taiyaki with me.” he took his hand off of your shoulder, but still maintained the eye contact that made your knees weak with joy.

A smile creeped up on your face. You jump up in excitement. “Duh, of course! I love that stuff!”

He chuckles at your excitement. You were always known to get a bit aggressive when passionate, and he found that cute. The way your face lit up when he mentioned food is a sight Ushijima will never get tired of. Ever.

“Great,” he smiled, putting his hand back in yours. “Let’s get out there then. To the game, I mean.”

You watch intently as your boyfriend and his teammates score point after point in the practice game. There were a few moments where they slipped up, but all in all, the match was a success for the team. You’d always be amazed by just how not tired he seems, even after running and jumping everywhere. You wonder if this guy even has the ability to sweat, or if he’s some sort of superhuman, volleyball machine.

The game was winding down, with the current score being 24-20 to Shiratorizawa. You were happy to cheer your boyfriend on, making sure that his water bottle was always full. After the visiting team got back on their bus to go home, you walked over to Ushiwaka.

“You did it, Waki!!” you beam, bouncing over to him with a spring in your step now that you two can hang out one-on-one. He smiles at you as he grabs his bag and water bottle.

“Ready to go?” he asks, and you nod your head excitedly. The two of you walk out of the school, getting on your bikes and riding down to your nearest Taimu to get those yummy desserts you were promised. By the time you two arrive there, the sun is already starting to set. Ushijima pays for your taiyaki and you both take a seat on a bench out front. You dig into the fish-shaped confectionery eagerly, not wasting a single crumb. Ushiwaka eats with you, although much slower.

You two talk about anything and everything, with most of the words being spoken by you. He watches the way your dark eyes seem to shine in the light of the setting sun, and the way the high points of your skin gleam. The way your smile stretches across your face, and the loud laugh you give when telling him a funny story. All the while, he has his hand on yours, lightly rubbing over your knuckles with his palm.

The pink and orange sky starts to fade into purple, with the cotton candy clouds clearing the way for the moon. You notice the streetlights turn on, and decide to wrap up your outing before your parents get mad at how late you’re staying out. “We should probably head home. I don’t want my parents getting mad at me.”

“Yeah. We wouldn’t want that.”

Ushijima goes to stand up, but you grab his wrist to stop him. “Wait.”

He turns back to look at you, with a quizzical expression on his face. You stand up with him, letting go of his hand for a moment. “Was this a date?” you ask, somewhat timidly.

Your boyfriend takes a moment to think before smiling, and even laughing a bit under his breath. “Of course it was.” he smiles, leaning down to plant a small kiss on your forehead. You blush furiously at the gesture, but try to play it off. “Right. Cool. Thought so.”

He smirks again at your reaction, but says nothing more. The two of you bicycle back to your house, and he walks you all the way up to your front door. When you step inside, your pets are all there to greet you. You wave goodbye to your lover, blowing him a little kiss goodnight - something you cringed at yourself for later. Ushijima waves back, waiting until you’re fully inside before he heads home.

As Ushiwaka returns to his small farmhouse, all he can think about is you. When he sets down his bag, all he thinks about is you. When he returns the animals to their pens, all he thinks about is you. Even as he’s drifting off to sleep, you’re the only thing on his mind.

He just can’t believe how lucky he is to have you. Someone who understands him, someone who supports him unconditionally. He doesn’t need to speak for you to know what he’s thinking, and for that he thanks you. Listening to the crickets outside his bedroom window, all he wonders is if you’re asleep already. Probably not. And honestly, he’s more than happy to be there for you in the morning when you complain about how tired you are. He’s already prepared to pack a lunch for you.

And as Ushijima finally slips into unconsciousness, all he can think about is how much he loves you. It’s cheesy, he knows, but he’s so grateful to be able to experience teenage love with you. And one day, he’ll show you just how much you mean to him.

this was a commission for a friend!

my commissions are not currently open, i only accepted this one because i've known this person for years

in the future, i plan to open commissions for those who want a personalized fic!

the original fic was more detailed to the commissioner's life, but i edited out the private details for security.

hope you enjoyed!

much love to all my supporters mwah

[missmatchablossom]

Gojo x Reader Royalty AU | Part II.

summary: you are a princess in an arranged marriage with the crown prince of the country, satoru gojo. when you finally come of age and move into his palace, the two of you are forced to spend time together as the future queen and king of the nation. the future king definitely seems to have a thing for you though.

a.n: here is the link to part I of the story! this next part is a little fluff between you and gojo, where the two of you are slowly developing feelings :)

tags: @lysaray I hope you enjoy!

~

Part II.

The arrival of the evening quieted the usual hustle and bustle of the castle. You admired the path the lanterns paved to the west wing of the castle, where Gojo resided.

You carefully made your way towards Gojo’s study, trying your best to avoid making sounds in case he was in the middle of an important phone call, which was often. The familiar wooden door was slightly ajar, and you couldn’t help yourself as you peaked inside and admired the sight of the prince. 

He sat at his usual spot at his desk, his room warmed by the soft glow of his desk lamp. His silvery hair was tousled, his chiseled jaw set in concentration. Your eyes wandered to the sky-blue button-up he had on, the top few buttons undone. It brought out his eyes, which were focused on the documents littering his desk. It was almost painful how handsome he really was.

“You could take a picture princess. I promise I won’t mind,” he said, his expression relaxing and his lips morphing into a teasing smirk. 

You rolled your eyes, smiling as you strolled to sit in your favorite spot on the couch across from him. Ever since the night of the ball, you found yourself sneaking visits to him every chance you got. And by the way he started leaving his door open for you, he didn’t seem to mind.

He placed his elbow on his desk, propping his head onto his palm as he looked at you. 

“To what do I owe this pleasure?” he asked, flashing you his infamous smile. That damned smile that made your heart squeeze no matter how often you saw it now.

“I overheard that someone hasn’t eaten dinner yet,” you said, searching his face. Despite the teasing note in his voice, the dullness in his eyes gave away his exhaustion. The more time you spent with him, the more you learned about the insane workload he took on. You urged him to let you help, but he gently declined, saying it was business he had to handle himself. 

The few times you brought up concerns for his health, he reassured you with a smile and a wink that he took care of himself. Once you befriended the staff who cared for him, you realized how much of a lie that was. They told you how the prince had began skipping meals and working late into the night ever since his brother abdicated. 

“I got busy,” he said shortly, blinking slowly as if he were realizing how tired he was.

“It's 11:00pm Prince Gojo,” you chided, crossing your arms and giving him a look.

“You can call me Toru, you know. But I do like it when you call me your prince,” he said casually, seemingly aware of how that comment intensified the fluttering you felt in your chest everytime he looked at you.

“Alright then, Toru,” you began, watching the pleased expression spread across his face when you called him by his first name.

“If you’re not gonna let me help you with your work, you have to at least promise me you’ll eat properly,” you said softly.

He stared at you incredulously, as if no one had ever cared about his health before. But you didn’t give him time to respond as you left to grab the tray of food from the cart you left outside his door, leaving it on the small coffee table in front of the sofa. 

“You brought me food?” he asked, the disbelief evident in his voice. It wasn’t often you got to see this side of him, the side that didn’t hide everything behind a smile.

“I brought us food actually, I haven’t had a second to eat yet until now either,” you admitted, feeling shy again. The two of you were so busy lately it was hard to even catch one meal a week with him, and you missed him. You wouldn’t admit that though - not yet.

“Are you hungry?” you asked, patting the seat on the couch next to you, gesturing to him to come sit with you. 

You felt heat pass through you as his gaze shamelessly swept you up and down, taking in the cerulean sundress you had on. You totally didn’t pick it to match his eyes, nope.

“Starved,” he said, shooting you a tight smile before moving to settle beside you on the couch, the scent of his cologne kissing your nose.

“Sorry, it might be a bit cold,” you admitted, eager to change the subject. He shook his head.

“This is great, thank you. I’m really hungry,” he said sincerely, and you nodded as you placed a plate in his hand and began loading it up with food you knew he liked.

He thanked you again, never taking his warm, reverent gaze off of you. 

You both ate in comfortable silence, devouring the food in front of you at a faster pace than usual. 

When you were done, he cleared your plates and grabbed the carafe of water by his desk. He filled one glass and silently handed it to you, setting another on the coffee table for himself. You reveled in moments like these, where it finally felt like you had him to yourself.

You smiled to yourself as you sipped the mint-infused water, remembering something about him hating the taste of plain water.

“I have something for you,” he said, making his way to the shelves by his desk. He pulled out a small cardboard box as he walked towards you with a rare, shy smile.

“You got me something?” you said, unable to hide the surprise in your voice as he gingerly placed the box in your hand.

“It’s something small. I picked it up at a cafe when I went out today for that conference,” he said. You didn’t miss the rub of his thumb against his pulse point - the only sign of nervousness he ever showed. You opened up the box, unable to contain your smile as you found a gigantic cupcake inside. 

You gasped in delight, hearing him immediately chuckle in response.

“You got me a cupcake?” you asked in disbelief, chest tightening as you imagined the crown prince of the nation setting time aside in his busy schedule to buy you a cupcake.

“It’s white chocolate matcha,” he said, his cerulean eyes sparkling expectantly.

“My favorite,” you said, voice in a near whisper. You recalled mentioning it to him the night of the ball, but you couldn’t believe he remembered. 

“Thank you,” you muttered, staring at the cupcake as if it were the most precious jewel in the nation. You couldn’t recall the last time someone had bought you something so simple, yet so meaningful.

“You are welcome, princess,” he said, an indulgent smile gracing his lips. 

“You don’t have to keep calling me princess, you know,” you said, throwing his own words back at him.

He hummed to himself, stretching his long arms out so they wrapped around the back of the couch - and around you by default.

“But I like calling you princess. Especially when you still blush everytime I call you that,” he said lowly, gently brushing his knuckles against the pink spreading across your cheeks.

You pressed your lips together to hide the shy smile on your face, turning your head away from him and placing the back of your hand against your cheek. It was indeed warm.

“You are such a flirt,” you said, not daring to look him in the eyes.

“You love it,” he teased, and you didn’t have to look at him to know he was smiling.

You shook your head and rolled your eyes again, turning your attention towards the cupcake in your hands. 

He handed you a fork and you eagerly took a bite, eyes rolling back as you savored the sweetness. 

“Holy fuck,” you said, staring at the prince in wonder.

“Such foul language for a princess,” he said, chuckling as he watched you.

“That good?” he asked.

You nodded eagerly. It was the best cupcake you had ever tried.

You grew embarrassed as he continued to stare, looking as if he’d be happy to watch you eat that cupcake forever. Feeling brave, you turned to him with a forkful of the cupcake, lifting it up towards him in offering.

“Want to try some?” you said boldly, enjoying the way his eyes widened ever so slightly whenever you were brave enough to catch him off guard.

Any boldness you had dissipated as he grinned, dipping his head down towards you as he placed his mouth gently over the fork, eyes flickering up to you for a second as he pulled back. 

You swore you stopped breathing as he used a swipe of his tongue to wipe the small bit of frosting off his top lip. You’ve never been so jealous of a fork.

He hummed contently to himself as he leaned back against the couch. 

“Delicious,” he said. 

Yes, yes he is.

You cleared your throat, focusing your attention to your cupcake to stop the trail of unholy thoughts in your mind. Every now and then, you’d feed him another bite, not daring to look him in the eye when his lips met with the fork. The two of you demolished the cupcake, and he got up take the empty box from your hands before you even got a chance to get up.

“Alright, I’ll let you finish up your work,” you said, moving to stand from the couch.

He stopped you with a cool hand covering your knee.

“Stay,” he said.

Badump. Badump.

You placed your hand over his, giving him a small squeeze.

“Don’t you have a lot left to do, my prince?” you asked, smiling at the hint of a blush reaching the tips of his ears.

“Well yes, but I’d much rather hear about your day. Cmon, talk to me,” he said, nudging your knee with his. 

“Hmm, alright. But only if you promise to sleep at least 7 hours tonight,” you said, knocking his knee back.

He let out a laugh, lighter than any laugh you’d heard from him before. 

“Deal. Now start talking, princess,” he said, turning his body and his attention fully towards you, where it stayed for the rest of the night.

[parasolladyansy]

watching the rain

One last thing before I actually focus on DxP loool have a little mental health break with us & a relaxing rainy Pokemon playlist by shadowatnoon 🌧️

The rest of this post might be upsetting if topics like mental health, depression, or trauma are sensitive ones to you. If that’s you, maybe stop here, & just watch the rain with us (& take care of yourself, okay?) 🩵

.

.

.

.

.

So. “What now?”

For a lot of us, the world feels very scary right now. I’ve been going back & forth between wanting to hide & wanting to take action. The current atmosphere is familiar in a bad way, just as familiar as the ones who’re making it feel this unsafe. At least I’m not alone this time. I’d like to help anyone feeling alone now to not be, too.

With that in mind, I figured maybe it could be helpful if I shared some things that helped me when things were unsafe &/or unstable in my life.

If that sounds like something you may want or need right now for whatever reason, get comfy - I, uh, spent waaay more time than I planned to on this (been sitting in my drafts for days) 🫖

—

Decide you are going to make it through this

Right now, every day, & especially during those dark, starless nights.*

You have the right to exist & be happy. You have the right to live how you want, with whom you want, & you deserve the safety & security to live that life. That is your basic human right. So keep going. Keep living the best you can, even if your best is just “enough”.

*If you ever feel unsafe or self-destructive, reach out to someone safe - family, a friend, your therapist, 988 (the national crisis lifeline), or whoever can help you best in that moment. While it can be scary or embarrassing, you’re worth it 🩵

Stay grounded in the truth

Always hold onto who you are & what you know to be true. Always.

I really believe this was ultimately what got me out of the bad situations I was trapped in. Even when I was at the point when I constantly blamed myself or believed every awful thing I was taught about myself & the world, there was always a small part of me that still knew, “No. That’s not true. This isn’t right.”

This can take a lot of mental fortitude, especially if there’s an unsafe person trying to challenge your truth or identity, or if they are actively doing what they can to gaslight you (& your peers so they can pass their behavior off as acceptable, even “right”). If you find yourself in a spot where it’s not safe to freely be yourself, remember: so long as there’s a part of you that holds onto the truth, you can make it.

So hold onto that, even if it makes you confused, or so angry you feel sick - it’s confusing because reality doesn’t match up with the truth, & it makes you angry because it’s unjust that it doesn’t. No matter what people say, the sky is still blue.

Detox your contacts

Depending on who it is, this is going to SUCK, but I can absolutely promise you this: your relief will outweigh your grief. Every single time I’ve said goodbye to toxic / unsafe people, places, communities, etc. I was always happier for it in the end.

Could be as simple as setting reasonable boundaries (if you don’t know what boundaries are as once I didn’t, it’s basically your human right to say “no” & have personal space), or if they’ve proven they will not respect your boundaries, saying goodbye until / unless they will.

There are some you can’t make that healthy separation right now - maybe you’re a minor or dependent adult in a toxic home, or you don’t have another job lined up from your toxic one yet. Whatever your situation is, this where you try to keep things on your terms as much as you can, & do whatever you can to ensure your immediate well-being as you make any boundaries or exit plans as needed for your long term well-being.

I’ve been hearing a lot of stories of people uninviting folks (or themselves) from the upcoming holidays. Been there. If you find yourself having to spend it with limited / no company: it can be lonely at first, but it can also be really nice when I looked for ways to celebrate anyways (dive into all the nice things about the season, have a little Friendsgiving, or just have a cozy one at home) ^_^

Find safe people (but be careful)

I said in a post not long ago that unsafe people often try to isolate you so you feel all alone. It’s easy to feel alone when bad things are happening - that’s why it’s important to have safe people to turn to when they happen. Especially now, we need to be there for each other. 🩵

Here’s the “be careful” part: not all of your safe people will be able to be there for you in every kind of moment. Most are just your buddies you can laugh & play with, forget your worries for a while as you talk about the weather. Some can listen to your troubles & worries, offering whatever comfort or advice they can. Very few can be there with you when you’re IN the trouble, & stand by you as needed.

Depending on how vulnerable you are, it can be very easy to cling to the wrong one, which can be embarrassing at best, very unsafe at worst. Wait. Take a breath. Sleep on it if you have to. Take as much time as you need to assess if they’re the one to be with you in whatever way you need.

I can’t tell you how much easier it’s been for me to keep going no matter how bad things got with even one safe person to turn to. When you’ve found that person, be sure to treasure them! 🩵🩵🩵

Enjoy life whenever you can! ^0^

In times like this, it’s so important to remember that there ARE still good things, good people, good places in this world. We need to make time for these good things, even if just for a few minutes.

So dive into your hobbies, keep your passions alive! Hang out with your friends, play Pokémon, draw, read, write, swim, play with your pet. Dust off the instruments you’ve been neglecting, have an awful jam sesh, laugh about it, & keep playing until it sounds kinda okay! If you don’t have a hobby, find one - it can be a lot of fun to discover what you like! Whatever is in your means that makes you feel happy & alive, do that

The thing I’ve always turned to the most is drawing - I have all these old diaries & sketchbooks from when I was a kid of just doodles & comics. My school notebooks all the way up to college have margins full of drawings - doodling helped me stay in the present. Then I started posting them online over the years, made some friends, & here we are! ^7^

—

I can appreciate that this advice isn’t perfect, & it may not fit your exact circumstances. That’s okay - if there’s even just one good thing you can take from this, then I’m happy.

To anyone who might be struggling right now & feel hopeless: thank you so much for being here! I am overjoyed that you are still here with us, even when you had days, weeks, even years when all you wanted to do was give up (I know). Keep living. Keep smiling whenever you can. Keep reaching out. Keep weathering that storm, even when no one else can hear it thundering over you. I’ve found that when I kept going, it’ll clear up…usually before you realize it. 🌦️🌈

Stay safe out there. Lots of love,

Anastasia (aka Ansy) 🩵

[franabz]

★Random 141 headcanons

Ghost is on the aroace spectrum, only having sexual feelings towards someone under very specific circumstances or a very strong bond. He's probably only had one or two "partners" in his life, both spanning throughout grade school. He also has commitment issues due to the amount of people he has lost in his line of work.

Ghost is a very good listener, despite popular belief. You give him a good story or gossip and you best believe he is sat down directly beside you, his eyes never leaving yours between small invested nods or subtle reactions behind his balaclava-concealed face.

Ghost is a picky eater, though after having been in the military for years now it has significantly gotten better. Well, anything is better than those god forsaken MRE packs, anyway. He still has certain foods he will scrunch his face and glare at behind his mask, but still eat; though begrudgingly.

Price is definitely a gift giver. Randomly showing up one day in front of your barracks to present you a little trinket that he claimed reminded him of you.

Price is always checking up on his fellow soldiers, making sure they are taking care of themselves and not neglecting their own needs. He knows how many soldiers tend to neglect their mental health first hand.

Price had a massive sweet tooth. He claims to hate anything sweet and says chocolate tastes like "dog shite", but the second he's along with some good pastries or sweets, you bet your ass they're gone by the time you get back. He somehow never gets caught.

Soap is a huge adrenaline junkie. You ever going to a theme park? He's already begging on his hands and knees to go with you, practically dragging you by the arm onto every single roller coaster and giddy with adrenaline the entire time in the line. He has definitely been on the slingshot ride more than once.

Soap has definitely slipped the Scotland national anthem into your playlists more times than once, silently wheezing to himself as he watches you go about your day, only to suddenly stop everything you were doing to slowly turn to look at him, knowing exactly who did it.

Soap gives the best hugs. You having a rough day and just need some alone time? Well too bad, he's already halfway to your barracks just to pull you into his arms in a huge bear hug (bonus points if you're shorter and he can lift you). Somehow always seems to lighten someone's day no matter how upset they are.

Gaz takes up photography on his free time. He even invested in a fancy expensive camera to take logs and photos of places he's been, food he's eaten, scenery, and friends. His personal favorite is a picture of Soap in a bar piss-drunk while mid way singing his heart out to whatever was on the karaoke machine, his arm slung around Ghost's shoulder to support himself and a half empty scotch on-hand.

Gaz can play piano, and very well at that. It is one of those hidden talents that nobody would have suspected from him until it actually happened. The group is strolling around a plaza during their off days between missions, finding a stray piano and watching in shock as Gaz suddenly hops into the seat and gives the rest of the group a knowing look, before completely taking the show away. "The hell'd you learn t'do that, Sergeant?" Price practically choked on his cigar.

Gaz has a roommate back at home, as well as a pet... parrot? An African Grey to be exact. He is always eager to get back home to his beloved bird and roommate, one of which practically became family to him at this point. He doesn't talk about his personal life much, hence why the rest of 141 was so surprised to hear he had a roommate. The one day he invited 141 to his apartment after a mission just to hang out gave them quite the surprise when they heard two unfamiliar voices; one from his roommate, and one from the bird. Definitely scared Soap more than once.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I start giving some very *very* Christian family members religious pamphlets from non-Christian religions as gifts?

To be clear, I am writing this while firmly believing I'm NTA but I am angry and don't trust my own judgment too much right now.

Background and Players: My Son (19) was adopted out as a baby by his incubator behind (my husband, 40) his father's back. He was abandoned at 4 by his adopted family because of behavioral issues related to what his incubator was putting into her body while she was pregnant with him, and went into foster care with people I will call Amom and Adad. Adad is a pastor in his 90s and Amom is a pastor's wife in her 80s. When Son was 13 and I had been with Husband for 5ish years, we had been told (by someone from his incubator's family but we didn't know that at the time) he was non-verbal and "mentally an infant" and that trying to pull him out of the routine he had would just be incredibly harmful to him, so we had given up hope of finding him and having a relationship with him. We got a phone call one day, a worker who was looking for a medical history for Son. Husband spent close to 3 hours on the phone with her, answering questions and asking anything he could squeeze in. Turns out, we had been lied to about his mental health just... completely. He's impossible to shut up and he graduated high school last year despite, you know, *gestures vaguely at everything* and I am incredibly proud of him. Half an hour after that call ended, she called back and told us Son might be interested in meeting us, was it okay for her to pass on our contact info. A month later, Son, Amom, Adad, Husband and I were sitting in a restaurant together and a month after that we went to their place for a week to spend Christmas with them. This is when they informed us that they had finalized his legal adoption a couple of weeks earlier. 2 years after that, my QPP moved in with us, and another year later 16 year old Son asked if he could move in with us. He still does.

The Issue: Son wants a continuing relationship with Amom and Adad, but due to the previously mentioned substances used by his incubator, he has memory and time management issues so I have to regularly remind him to contact them. I have no problem doing this, but the contact we have had with them over the last few years has soured me on their company. I've got no problem reminding Son to contact them and organizing rides for him to visit (usually QPP and I driving him, the trip is a couple of hours each way) but I'd rather never speak to them myself if it can be avoided. It didn't start out this way, but over the years they have made it very clear that they don't respect anyone else's beliefs. Not just us, like there was one night where they were going off about some Danish surgeon saying publicly that he was Muslim first, Danish second, and they were trying to convince us to be terrified by that. The conversation ended awkwardly when Husband asked if Adad was Nationality or Christian first (because that's different you see). We have found books on the bookshelves in the guest room about how any kind of queerness at all is demonic possession, one of which they wrote. They talk about things like being sent on a mission by their god to save as many (and I hate that these are quotes) "brown heathen children" by making them Christians as possible (Son and his adopted siblings are all First Nations, Amom and Adad are as white as I am), or how Jewish people are evil for stopping Christians from claiming their suffering because "Jesus was a Jew so aren't all Christians also Jews?". Amom once spent a week trying to convince me to go to church with her and share the details of my childhood sexual abuse with the entire congregation because "it will show God you are ready to be forgiven". QPP is a shintoist and after they found that out, we started seeing more literature about the Japanese, specifically during WWII, around their house when we visited.

We have politely made it clear that we are not interested in Christianity, especially not their version. Multiple times. We thought it was finally over after Son had a meltdown at them at his graduation ceremony because he wanted JUST ONE conversation with them that wasn't about Jesus. He was in tears trying to explain that to them, and their response was to tell him he needed to come back to church so they could lay on hands and chase all the demons making him say these horrible disrespectful things to them out of him. He was supposed to stay with them for a few days to visit after that, but by the time I tracked him down and got him calm, he didn't want to go anymore. They seemed to stop after that, like they actually backed off and I think I got maybe 2 emails that didn't mention God or Jesus, not even a "God bless" in the sign off. We were optimistic. Son was late organizing it but we dropped him off (at his request, he's worried that Adad won't make it to next Christmas and wanted to see him) at their place on Boxing Day. We did not hang around, we did not send gifts, we didn't even reply to the Family Christmas Email (it had a video of a Jordan B Peterson rant embedded in it and I've told them before that we are not interested in anything that sack of hateful arrogance has to say please stop putting him in my inbox). We have done everything we can to make it clear that we do not want a relationship with them for ourselves, including outright directly telling them politely to their faces that we will not stop Son from seeing them but we don't feel comfortable around them and don't want a relationship with them for ourselves. Son came back with "gifts" from them - a study guide for a specific Bible book (I got John, Husband got Michael, QPP set his on fire before we saw who it was) and a bag of candy that looked like it came out of a thrift store (I got the same one they always get me, which I laughed off the first and second and third time and explained I couldn't stand them because my abuser used to give me one when he was done. Husband is diabetic and got York Patties. QPP actually got something decent though, $20 for gas).

I have managed to keep my "I'd rather you hadn't bothered actually" rantingvto Tumblr, which i don't think they even know exists, but I'm still pissed about the Bible crap as "gifts". I am considering changing tactics completely and being super friendly, mirroring their energy, and giving them the same treatment they've given us. I want to make excuses to visit so I can explain the finer points of shintoism and Celtic paganism in every single conversation. I want to give them books for gifts, books like The Tao of Pooh and The Gospel of The Flying Spaghetti Monster. I want to wrap cash in pamphlets about The Invisible Pink Unicorn and leave it on their fridge.

QPP and husband think I should give myself more time to calm down and just keep ignoring it and playing nice when I'm forced to play at all but like, IT'S BEEN 6 YEARS.

What are these acronyms?

[malebreastmilk]

I’m begging 🙏🏾! I read your How would Gojo sleep with you imagine, I was wondering if you could make one for Toji perhaps 🥹😊Tanks youuu eee 💜

A/N: i am so sorry for taking so long i have started college!!! ... but i have returned with toji morsels <3 i hope this is to the toji nations liking 💜💜💜

Toji ♡ 

♡sleepy!toji coming home late and always finding you asleep with the divine dogs on the couch since you were always so stubborn in your ways wanting to wait for him to get home despite his casual hints at not wanting you to jeopardize your health for him

♡sleepy!toji never letting you sleep without some sort of physical contact with him, he adores holding your form with his hands caressing you as he memorizes the shape and feel of the person he holds so dearly, absolutely melts if you sleep on top of him, and he won’t admit it but he secretly adores the feel of you holding him or trying to at least

♡sleepy!toji pelting you with kisses before you sleep, he does his best to make sure you are aware of how much he cares for you, even if it’s not through words, he is attentive to your reactions, making sure to remember what makes you flustered, return the favor by placing gentle kisses against his scars to remind him of his own worth

♡sleepy!toji holding onto you until the sun is at its peak, not wanting to leave the warmth of your presence and return to the real world, why do any of that when he could bask in your presence and love? a strongly worded voicemail from shui tends to do the trick…or just a chaste kiss and a please which he can never turn down

“Damn dogs keep takin' all the bed space an' yer smilin’. Lucky I love you more than anythin'.”

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved on our archive

Swab, swirl, squirt, sit tight. By now, you’re likely familiar with the ritual of performing a COVID test at home or on the go. Disease detection has evolved swiftly since 2020, when you may have had to seek out a pop-up testing clinic or wait hours in line at your local health department, with clinicians on standby to stick a cotton swab up your nose.

Rapid COVID tests have since become a staple of cough-and-cold aisles across America, and just weeks ago the federal government resumed its periodic distribution of four free tests per household. But the convenience of self-testing comes with a caveat: The onus is on you to report your results.

First, know that test reporting isn’t mandatory in the U.S., so you’re hardly in hot water if you haven’t documented your COVID infection or lack thereof with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) or state or local public health authorities. Though perhaps more people would self-report if it were a requirement, says Dr. Sujata Ambardar, an infectious disease specialist at Inova Fairfax Hospital in Falls Church, Va.

“People probably are not self-reporting because they don’t want to have to not go to work—or they may want to go to work—it’s different reasons, and they may not want other people to know,” Ambardar tells Fortune. “Human nature is that they’ll probably only do it if they have to do it. Once you make it non-mandatory, then they tend not to do it.”

Today, if you get an antigen or PCR COVID test in a clinical setting, it’s still your health care provider’s job to report your results. While you’re well within your rights not to report your home test results, not doing so can come as a detriment to public health.

Between Feb. 1, 2022, and Jan. 1, 2023, an estimated 54 million adult COVID cases were unaccounted for in official records, according to a national study published Sept. 30 in the journal JAMA Network Open. That’s more than twice as many as those documented. At the state level, unaccounted infections ranged from 59,000 in Wyoming to 6.3 million in California. Researchers cited the government-led mass distribution of at-home tests as a possible driver of the discrepancies.

Report COVID results at MakeMyTestCount.org In theory, Ambardar says, reporting your COVID test results is “just one extra step.” But when that second line appears on the test card, confirming the disease has hit your household, formally documenting the outcome may not be your first priority. Even if you’re negative, you were likely feeling poorly enough to take the test in the first place and may not feel up to self-reporting.

But if and when you choose to do so, visit MakeMyTestCount.org to securely and anonymously report both positive and negative COVID test results. The site is a collaboration between medical data firm Care Evolution and the National Institute of Biomedical Imaging and Bioengineering, part of the National Institutes of Health.

MakeMyTestCount.org is free to use and doesn’t require you to immediately self-report. In fact, your results don’t even have to be recent. As of early October, the site allowed for the input of home test results going back to November 2021. If you need proof of illness for work or school, the site provides documentation. And while over-the-counter tests that screen for both COVID and flu aren’t as common as those that screen for COVID alone, you can report those results on the site, too.

Keep in mind that it’s just as important to report negative results as positive ones. The week ended Sept. 21, national COVID test positivity was 11.6%, CDC records show, down from 13.4% the previous week. If not for the inclusion of negative results, test positivity would always be 100%.

Depending on the brand of COVID test you’re using, you may not have to visit MakeMyTestCount.org at all. Some brands, such as iHealth, offer a free corresponding smartphone app. With the tap of your finger, you can forward your results to the CDC and/or your health care provider. If you have the time, notifying your doctor can help guide the course of COVID treatment in your community, says Dr. Donald Dumford, an infectious disease specialist at Cleveland Clinic Akron General.

“The more we know about the true number of cases of COVID, the better we’re able to understand the transmission of COVID at this point in time, as we go from it being pandemic to endemic, which means it’s just something we live with now,” Dumford tells Fortune. “It also helps us to identify the potential rise of new strains of infection, especially if you’re seeing a strong uptick in cases.”

Study Link: jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2824211

[mostlysignssomeportents]

When private equity destroys your hospital

I'm on tour with my new novel The Bezzle! Catch me TOMORROW in PHOENIX (Changing Hands, Feb 29) then Tucson (Mar 9-10), San Francisco (Mar 13), and more!

As someone who writes a lot of fiction about corporate crime, I naturally end up spending a lot of time being angry about corporate crime. It's pretty goddamned enraging. But the fiction writer in me is especially upset at how cartoonishly evil the perps are – routinely doing things that I couldn't ever get away with putting in a novel.

Beyond a doubt, the most cartoonishly evil characters are the private equity looters. And the most cartoonishly evil private equity looters are the ones who get involved in health care.

(Buckle up.)

Writing for The American Prospect, Maureen Tcacik details a national scandal: the collapse of PE-backed hospital chain Steward Health, a company that bought and looted hospitals up and down the country, starving them of everything from heart valves to prescription paper, ripping off suppliers, doctors and nurses, and callously exposing patients to deadly risk:

https://prospect.org/health/2024-02-27-scenes-from-bat-cave-steward-health-florida/

Steward occupies a very special place in the private equity looting cycle. Private equity companies arrange themselves on a continuum of indiscriminate depravity. At the start of the continuum are PE funds that buy productive and useful firms (everything from hospitals to car-washes) using "leveraged buyouts." That means that they borrow money to buy the company and use the company itself as collateral: it's like you getting a bank-loan to buy your neighbor's mortgage out from under them, and using your neighbor's house as collateral for that loan.

Once the buyout is done, the PE fund pays itself a "special dividend" (stealing money the business needs to survive) and then starts charging the business a "management fee" for the PE fund's expertise. To pay for all this, the PE bosses start to hack away at the company. Quality declines. So do wages. Prices go up. The company changes suppliers, opting for cheaper alternatives, often stiffing the old company. There are mass layoffs. The remaining employees end up doing three peoples' jobs, for lower wages, with fewer materials of lower quality.

Eventually, that top-feeding PE company finds a more desperate, more ham-fisted PE company to unload the business onto. That middle-feeding company also does a leveraged buyout, pays itself another special dividend, cuts wages, staffing and quality even further. They switch to even worse suppliers and stiff the last batch. Prices go up even higher.

Then – you guessed it – the middle-feeding PE company finds an even more awful PE bottom-feeder to unload the company onto. That bottom feeder does it all again, without even pretending to leave the business in condition to do its job. The company is a shambling zombie at this point, often producing literal garbage in place of the products that made its reputation. Employees' paychecks bounce, or don't show up at all. The company stops bothering to pay the lawyers that have been fending off its creditors. Those lawyers sue the company, too.

That's the kind of PE company Steward Health was, and, as the name suggests, Steward Health is in the business of stripping away the very last residue of value from community hospitals. As you might imagine, this gets pretty fucking ugly.

Steward owns 32 hospitals up and down the country, though its holdings are dwindling as the company walks away from its debt-burdened holdings, after years of neglect that have rendered them unfit for use as health facilities – or for any other purpose. Tcacik's piece offers a snapshot of one such hospital: Florida's Rockledge Regional Medical Center, just eight miles from Cape Canaveral.

Rockledge is a disaster. The fifth floor was, at one point, home to 5,000 bats.

Five.

Thousand.

Bats.

(Rockledge stiffed the exterminators.)

The bats were just the beginning. One of the internal sewage pipes ruptured. Whole sections of the hospital were literally full of shit, oozing out of the walls and ceiling, slopping over medical equipment.

That's an urgent situation for any hospital, but for Rockledge, it's catastrophic, because Rockledge is a hospital without any hospital supplies. Steward has stiffed the companies that supply "heart valves, urology lasers, Impella catheters, cardiac catheterization balloons, slings for lifting heavier patients, blood and urine test reagents, and most recently, prescription paper." Key medical equipment has been repossessed. So have the Pepsi machines. The hospital cafeteria had its supply of cold cuts repossessed:

https://www.reddit.com/r/massachusetts/comments/1agc1j4/comment/kolicqo/

It's not just Steward's nonpayments that reek of impending doom. Its payments also bear the hallmarks of a scam artist on the brink of blowing off the con. The company recently paid off a vendor with five separate checks for $1m, each drawn on "a random hospital in Utah" (Steward recently walked away from its Utah hospitals; its partners there are suing it for stealing $18m on their way out the door).

This company – which owns 32 hospitals! – has resorted to gambits like sending photos of fake checks to doctors it hasn't paid in months as "proof" that the money was coming (the checks arrived 22 days later).

Steward owes so much money to its employees – $1.66m to just one doctors' group. But the medical staff keep doing their jobs, and are reluctant to speak on the record, thanks to Steward's reputation for vicious retaliation. Those health workers keep showing up to take care of patients, even as the hospital crumbles around them. One clinician told Tcacik: "I watched a bed collapse underneath a [patient] who had just undergone hip surgery."

Rockledge has nine elevators, but only five of them work – the other four have been broken for a year. The hospital's fourth floor has been converted to "a graveyard of broken beds." The sinks are clogged, or filled with foul gunk. There's black mold. Nurses have noted on the maintenance tags that the repair service refuses to attend the hospital until their overdue bills are paid. The fifteen-person on-site maintenance team was cut to just two workers.

Steward is just the latest looting owner of Rockledge. After the Great Financial Crisis, private equity consultants helped sell it to Health Management Associates. The hospital's CEO took home a $10m bonus for that sale and exited; Health Management Associates then quickly became embroiled in a Medicare fraud and kickback scandal. Soon after, Rockledge was passed on to Community Health Systems, who then sold it on to Rockledge.

Steward, meanwhile, was at that time owned by an even bigger private equity giant, Cerberus, which then sold Steward off. That deal was performatively complex and hid all kinds of mischief. Prior to Cerberus's sell-off of Steward, they sold off Steward's real-estate. The buyer was Medical Properties Trust, who gave Cerberus $1.25b for the real-estate: three hospitals in Florida and three more in Ohio. Steward then contracted to operate these hospitals on MPT's behalf, and pay MPT rent for the real-estate.

This complex arrangement was key to siphoning value out of the hospital and to keeping angry creditors at bay – if you can't figure out who owes you money, it's a lot harder to collect on the debt. The scheme was masterminded by Steward founder/CEO Ralph de la Torre. De la Torre is notorious for taking a massive dividend out of the company while it owed $1.4b to its creditors. He bought a $40m yacht with the money.

De la Torre was once feted as a business genius who would "disrupt" healthcare. But as Steward's private jet hops around "Corfu, Santorini, St. Maarten and Antigua" as its hospitals literally crumble, he's becoming less popular. In Massachusetts, politicians have railed against Steward and de la Torre (Governor Healey wants the company to leave the state "as soon as possible").

Florida, by contrast, is much more friendly to Steward. The state Health and Human Services Committee chair Randy Fine is an ardent admirer of hospital privatization and is currently campaigning to sell off the last community hospital in Brevard County. The state inspectors are likewise remarkably tolerant of Steward's little peccadillos. The quasi-governmental agency that inspects hospitals has awarded this shit-and-bat-filled, elevator-free, understaffed rotting hulk "A" grades for quality.

These inspectors jointly represent a mismatched assortment of private and public agencies, dominated by a nonprofit called Leapfrog, the brainchild of Harvard public-health prof Lucian Leape, who founded it in 2000. Leapfrog likes to tout its "transparent" assessment criteria, and Steward are experts at hitting those criteria, spending the exact minimum to tick every box that Leapfrog inspectors use as proxies for overall quality and safety.

This is a pretty great example of Goodhart's Law: "every measurement eventually becomes a target, whereupon it ceases to be a good measurement":

https://xkcd.com/2899/

But despite Steward's increasingly furious creditors and its decaying facilities, the company remains bullish on its ability to continue operations. Medical Properties Trust – the real estate investment trust that is nominally a separate company from Steward – recently hosted a conference call to reassure Wall Street investors that it would be a going concern. When a Bank of America analyst asked MPT's CFO how this could possibly be, given the facility's dire condition and Steward's degraded state, the CFO blithely assured him that the company would get bailouts: "We own hospitals no one wants to see closed."

That's the thing about PE and health-care. The looters who buy out every health-care facility in a region understand that this makes them too big to fail: no matter how dangerous the companies they drain become, local governments will continue to prop them up. Look at dialysis, a market that's been cornered by private equity rollups. Today, if you need this lifesaving therapy, there's a good chance that every accessible facility is owned by a private equity fund that has fired all its qualified staff and ceased sterilizing its needles. Otherwise healthy people who visit these clinics sometimes die due to operator error. But they chug along, because no dialysis clinics is worse that "dialysis clinics where unqualified sadists sometimes kill you with dirty needles":

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/the-dirty-business-of-clean-blood

The bad news is that private equity has thoroughly colonized the entire medical system. They took hospitals, fired the doctors, then took over the doctors' groups that provided outsource staff to the hospital:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/04/04/a-mind-forever-voyaging/#prop-bets

It's illegal for private equity companies to own doctors' practices (doctors have to own these), but they obfuscated the crime with a paper-thin pretext that they got away with despite its obvious bullshittery:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/05/21/profitable-butchers/#looted

The financier who decides whether you live or die depends on an algorithm that literally sets a tolerable level of preventable deaths for the patients trapped in the practice:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/05/any-metric-becomes-a-target/#hca

Private equity also took over emergency rooms and boobytrapped them with "surprise billing" – junk fees that ran to thousands of dollars that you had to pay even if the hospital was in network with your insurer. They made billions from this, and spent a many millions from that booty keeping the scam alive with scare ads:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/04/21/all-in-it-together/#doctor-patient-unity

The whole health stack is colonized by private equity-backed monopolies. Even your hospital bed!

https://pluralistic.net/2022/01/05/hillrom/#baxter-international

Then there's residential care. Private equity cornered many regional markets on nursing homes and turned them into slaughterhouses, places where you go to die, not live:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/02/23/acceptable-losses/#disposable-olds

The palliative care sector is also captured by private equity. PE bosses hire vast teams of fast-talking salespeople who con vulnerable older people into entering an end-of-life system before they are ready to die. Thanks to loose regulation, the nation is filled with fake hospices that can rake in millions from Medicare while denying all care to their patients (hospice patients don't get life-extending medication or procedures, by definition):

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/26/death-panels/#what-the-heck-is-going-on-with-CMS

If you survive this long enough, Medicare eventually tells the hospice that you're clearly not dying and you get kicked off their rolls. Now you have to go through the lengthy bureaucratic nightmare of convincing the system – which was previously informed that you were at death's door – that you are actually viable and need to start getting care again (good luck with that).

If that kills you, guess what? Private equity has rolled up funeral homes up and down the country, and they will scam your survivors just as hard as the medical system that killed you did:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/09/09/high-cost-of-dying/#memento-mori

The PE sector spent more than a trillion dollars over the past decade buying up healthcare companies, and it has trillions more in "dry powder" allocated for further medical acquisitions. Why not? As the CFO of Medical Properties Trust told that Bank of America analyst last week, when you "own hospitals no one wants to see closed." you literally can't fail, no matter how many people you murder.

The PE sector is a reminder that the crimes people commit for money far outstrip the crimes they commit for ideology. Even the most ideological killers are horrified by the murders their profit-motivated colleagues commit.

Last year, Tkacic wrote about the history of IG Farben, the German company that built Monowitz, a private slave-labor camp up the road from Auschwitz to make the materiel it was gouging Hitler's Wehrmacht on:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/02/plunderers/#farben

Farben bought the cheapest possible slaves from Auschwitz, preferentially sourcing women and children. These slaves were worked to death at a rate that put Auschwitz's wholesale murder in the shade. Farben's slaves died an average of just three months after starting work at Monowitz. The situation was so abominable, so unconscionable, that the SS officers who provided outsource guard-labor to Monowitz actually wrote to Berlin to complain about the cruelty.

The Nuremberg trials are famous for the Nazi officers who insisted that they were "just following order" but were nonetheless executed for their crimes. 24 Farben executives were also tried at Nuremberg, where they offered a very different defense: "We had a fiduciary duty to our shareholders to maximize our profits." 19 of the 24 were acquitted on that basis.

PE is committed to an ideology that is far worse than any form of racial animus or other bias. As a sector, it is committed to profit above all other values. As a result, its brutality knows no bounds, no decency, no compassion. Even the worst crimes we commit for hate are nothing compared to the crimes we commit for greed.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/28/5000-bats/retaliation#charnel-house