#one difference admittedly is which personality *really* owns the body but whatever the dynamic is still the same mmkay

[imagitory]

[batboys-batboys]

I’ve recently witnessed some discourse in the fandom in which the OP called Nesta an abuser and offered thoughts on the relationship dynamic she has with her sisters vs with Emerie and Gwyn, the Valkyries she now refers to as sisters. Someone commented on said post and asked when Nesta had abused Elain. There’s inherent bias in this post as I really like Elain’s character in the books but for the purposes of this post only CANON will be referenced.

First off, let me preface this by saying I love Nesta as a character, but I don’t put her on any kind of pedestal for a multitude of reasons. Also, please let me know if you’d like for me to retag this in any particular way as this is my first serious post.

Here we go…

Chapter 17

Silver lined Elain’s eyes, but her voice remained steady, sure. “There was nothing that could have been done to save him, Nesta.”

The words were kindling. Elain had accepted his death as inevitable. She hadn’t bothered to fight for him, as if he hadn’t been worth the effort, precisely as Nesta knew she herself wasn’t worth the effort.

This time, Nesta didn’t stop the power from shining in her eyes; she shook so violently she had to fist her hands. “You tell yourself there’s nothing that could have been done because it’s unbearable to think that you could have saved him, if you’d only deigned to show up a few minutes earlier.” The lie was bitter in her mouth.

It wasn’t Elain’s fault their father had died. No, that was entirely Nesta’s own fault. But if Elain was so determined to root out the good in her, then she’d show her sister how ugly she could be. Let a fraction of this agony rip into her.

This was why Elain had chosen Feyre. This.

Feyre had rescued Elain time and again. But Nesta had sat by, armed only with her viper’s tongue. Sat by while they starved. Sat by when Hybern stole them away and shoved them into the Cauldron. Sat by when Elain had been kidnapped. And when their father had been in Hybern’s grip, she had done nothing, nothing to save him, either. Fear had frozen her, blanketing her mind, and she’d let it do so, let it master her, so that by the time her father’s neck had snapped, it had been too late. And entirely her fault.

Why wouldn’t Elain choose Feyre?

Elain stiffened, but refused to balk from whatever she beheld in Nesta’s gaze. “You think I’m to blame for his death?” Challenge filled each word. Challenge—from Elain, of all people. “No one but the King of Hybern is to blame for that.” The quaver in her voice belied her firm words.

Nesta knew she’d hit her mark. She opened her mouth, but couldn’t continue. Enough. She had said enough. That fast, the power in her receded, vanishing into smoke on the wind. Leaving only exhaustion weighing her bones, her breath. “It doesn’t matter what I think. Go back to Feyre and your little garden.”

Even during their squabbles in the cottage, fighting over who got clothes or boots or ribbons, it had never been like this. Those fights had been petty, born of misery and discomfort. This was a different beast entirely, from a place as dark as the gloom at the base of the library.

Not the blatant belittlement with that “little garden” comment. Trust me when I say I know intrusive thoughts and that this was early on in Nesta’s mental journey but still. This is her, CANONICALLY, preying on Elain’s emotions about what happened with their father and Hybern. We know that Nesta went through a lot of self-hate in this book but that whole “Let a fraction of this agony rip into her” was uncalled for. Elain went to see her sister, whom she admires and recognizes as her protector, only to get chewed out. Don’t get me wrong, I’m aware that Nesta didn’t want her there but Nesta was unable to control her emotions and consciously sought to hurt Elain with her words. (Not that she’s not hurting/hating herself too I mean just read the underlined part.)

Chapter 21 (sidenote: this chapter needs to be talked more about in the fandom)

Post Nesta refusing to let Elain find the Trove and the “Shall I tend to my little garden forever?” moment. (iconic btw)

Nesta’s pulse pounded throughout her body. “Do you not remember the war? What we encountered? Do you not remember the Cauldron kidnapping you, bringing you into the heart of Hybern’s camp?”

“I do,” Elain said coldly. “And I remember Feyre rescuing me.”

For a heartbeat, it appeared that Elain might say something to soften the words. But Nesta cut her off, seething at the pity about to be thrown her way. “Look who decided to grow claws after all,” she crooned. “Maybe you’ll become interesting at last, Elain.”

Nesta saw the blow land, like a physical impact, in Elain’s face, her posture. No one spoke, though shadows gathered in the corners of the room, like snakes preparing to strike.

Elain’s eyes brightened with pain. Something imploded in Nesta’s chest at that expression. She opened her mouth, as if it could somehow be undone. But Elain said, “I went into the Cauldron, too you know. And it captured me. And yet somehow all you can think of is what mytrauma did to you.”

Aside from the obvious iconic nature of this whole exchange here we see Nesta yet again hurt and belittle Elain. And yeah, sure, Elain tried to hurt Nesta too here by throwing in that reminder that it was Feyre (and Az) who went into Hybern’s camp and rescued her. But as soon as she did it she went into an apology mode but was cut off as her sister couldn’t stand someone feeling sad for her and needed to remind Elain that she’s a bad person who hurts others. The “interesting at last” comment was a (pardon my French) bitch move. There, I said it.

Nesta knew just which words to use to beat down her younger sister who’d always looked up to her, and she didn’t hesitate to use them. She knew which words would hurt her and she said them. Elain shot back here though and reminded Nesta that her trauma with being captured by the Cauldron is her own and no one can shoulder that for her. And that despite this trauma, she’s willing to risk herself to find the Trove and face the magic that took her choices away.

Anyways, I just wanted to shed some light on some scenes that I think a lot of readers and participants of the acotar tumblr fandom glossed over. These were, coincidentally, 2 of the few times Elain showed up in ACOSF. I mean, given the fandom’s warring views on Elain as a character it’s not shocking people would gloss over her and Nesta’s interactions (even though she who knows more about Nesta than anyone else).

I guess I’ll close this by saying that Nesta is not a perfect character. And, admittedly, these scenes did happen in the first half of the book. However, just because Nesta battled her mental health and overcame a lot of challenges, it doesn’t erase the fact that she hurt Elain with her words. She preyed on her younger sister’s love for her and (to my recollection) did not apologize for the way she treated her. Nesta’s an interesting character and so is Elain. Elain is a huge part of the acotar story/world, whether you like it or not.

[noyaism]

Own It

Pairing: SunaxFem!Reader

Word Count: 3.9k

Warnings: car sex, drug usage (weed), degrading, orgasm denial, creampie, choking, spit play, sir!suna, power dynamics, spanking, praising, and a touch of size kink (lmk if i missed any warnings!)

Song Inspo: Own It - Drake

Ever since your first year of high school, the very first day when you met Suna Rintarou for the first time, you found yourself hopelessly crushing. You couldn't tell if it was his stoic look, the vibe he gave off, the intelligence under it all, but whatever it may have been, Suna peaked your interest in every way possible. This caused you to almost instantly befriend him. He was a bit of a tough nut to crack at the beginning of your friendship, but he eventually let you in and let you get close, and as that happened your feelings for him only grew stronger. 

And now here you were, in your first year of college. The feelings you had for him were the same as they had been for years now, not diminished in the slightest. Your friendship with him had become so important to you, though. He was a vital part in your life, and you had to learn to cope with the fact that telling him how you truly felt might ruin the way things were. That was a possibility you couldn't even begin to fathom, and so even though it almost killed you to do, you tried your best to keep those feelings at bay.

Even with your barred feelings, you still did everything with Suna, trying your best never to make your true feelings known. One thing the two of you had recently got into, after a party you were invited to and forcibly made him accompany you to, was smoking. You knew people who did it in high school, but it was never really your scene. You knew Suna had done it a couple times before going to the party, but that night he finally convinced you to try it, and ever since then you two smoked together almost on the daily.

It was a night as normal as any other one. Suna had texted you, asking if you wanted to go smoke. That question was a no brainer, as it always was, and he picked you up fairly soon after. You drove to your usual spot, the picnic area of a park that wasn't too far away from campus. It was usually emptied out by eleven, a couple stragglers stargazing was the most you ever saw. Tonight was about the norm, Suna’s car being the only one in the parking lot, you two the only ones around.

“Let me try rolling it.” You offered as Suna pulled a rolling tray out of the glove compartment, and the weed out of his jacket pocket. 

“You sucked last time you tried to roll. Sure you're ready to try again?” You stuck your tongue out at Suna, shaking your head lightly at the dig.

“I’ll never get better if I don't practice. Hand it over.” It was a fair enough assertion, thus Suna handed you the rolling tray, with both the bag of bud, a grinder and a pack of wraps on it. Admittedly, you weren't the best at rolling. Someone else had always done it for you, either that or you were smoking off carts, so it was never a skill you had really developed. It wasn't until recently that you had started to roll yourself, and it was definitely a bit harder than it looked. 

“Now see, this one is much better.” You said as you dried the blunt off, running a lighter over it to seal it all up. Suna chuckled lightly, nodding his head as he admired your work.

“Yeah, it looks pretty good, I gotta hand it to you.” You let out a satisfied chuckle and got into the back of the car, settling comfortably in the backseat and patting the space next to you.

“Cmon, I can and will smoke this thing alone if you don't get back here.” You jokingly threatened. Suna nodded, quickly grabbing his phone and putting some music on shuffle before joining you in the back. 

A white cloud of smoke filled the car, hazing your sight just enough for Suna, who sat beside you, to be just a bit more blurry than he should be. As he took the last couple hits the blunt had left he cracked the window open a bit, discarding it onto the cement below and rolling the window back up so too much of the smoke didn’t escape. You laid your head on his shoulder, breathing in the familiar smell of cannabis and letting your breathing level out as the high started to set into your body. As per usual, the weed mellowed you out, allowing you to just relax with him. The silence from the lack of conversation was easily filled by the music that played from the speakers, F**k the World by Brent Faiyaz reverberating through the vehicle. Suna hummed lightly along to the song, and you shut your eyes and simply listened to him. 

It was times like this that you wished you had the guts to tell Suna how you felt about him, but once again you thought it best not to. Maybe it was how stoic he was; even though you were definitely the closest person in the world to him, and you probably understood his emotions the best, there was still no way for you to read if these feelings were at all reciprocated. It was the same things you found so attractive about him that also terrified you to open up. You didn’t want to read into the way he treated you, as you thought that was only setting yourself up to be disappointed, and so you simply wallowed in the feeling of a love so painfully unrequited that you were addicted to how bad it felt. 

“Are you okay, y/n?” He asked, noticing your expression was a bit off, which you hadn’t previously noticed. You nodded your head quickly, picking it up off his shoulder and looking over towards him.

“Yeah, yeah I’m chill. Mind kinda started to wander, is all.”

“Off to where?” 

“It’s nothing.” You quickly objected, shaking your head a bit frantically.

“It’s obviously something, just tell me.” You sighed lightly, knowing very well Suna wasn’t going to drop the topic until he knew what was bothering you. He cared way too much about how you felt to just let something like that go. You knew you had to just swallow your pride and tell him, but you couldn’t get the words out. The pure thought of saying you liked him made your throat feel like it was closing up. So, logically, there was only one way for you to get your point across.

Thus, you kissed him.

It wasn’t a long kiss, frankly because your cheeks got so hot you thought your head might just explode, but it was enough for Suna to understand what exactly it was you were trying to say. As you pulled away the gravity of what it was you actually did hit you, and you hid your face in your hands, shaking your head a bit.

“I’m so sorry, Suna. I didn’t mean to...well I did, but I just don’t want the fact that I like you to make things different between us.” Before he responded Suna took hold of your chin between his fingers, pulling your face up and out of hiding so you were now looking directly at him. 

“You’re an idiot. A pretty one, but an idiot nonetheless.”

Before you could ask what he meant his lips were on yours once again, but this kiss felt so much different than the first one. This one had passion behind it, passion that you didn’t know Suna even had for you. Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him in closer so you could kiss him deeper. He pulled you onto his lap, hands firmly gripping your ass. 

As the music changed you began to move your hips to the rhythm, I Don’t Think You’re Ready by Tank bumping through the speakers. It was a pretty fitting song for the current situation, as you were simultaneously so ready for what might happen with Suna, and yet you hadn't a single clue if you were ready to take it all. 

Your hands snaked up into his hair, tugging softly on the brown strands as the kiss began to get even more heated. It didn't help that it was already pretty hot in the car, but this offered you the perfect opportunity to not only undress yourself, but Suna as well. You pulled your shirt up and off of you, letting it fall to the floor without much regard for where it was going. His jacket and shirt joined the growing pile, and in an instant your lips were reconnected. Kissing him was addicting, even better than what you had imagined it might've been like. 

You whined a bit as he pulled away, a pout coming over your lips.

“I’m guessing by that look you're okay with going further with this.” You nodded your head, leaning forward and kissing him softly.

“I’m all yours, Suna.”

“That's what I like to hear.”

Now that he had permission to continue, Suna was more than ready to get into it. Just as much as you fantasized what it would be like to be intimate with him, he thought the very same about you, and wanted to make some of his fantasies a reality. He reached behind you and swiftly unclasped your bra, lips latching onto your nipple as you discarded it. He rolled the opposite bud between his fingers, and your hips continued to grind into his. He kissed all over the skin of your breasts, a sweet gesture in comparison to his next moves. 

With one fluid motion your back was now clad to the backseat, and Suna hovered above you. The silver chain he wore around his neck dangled down into your face, enhancing the pure sight of him. Not even Michaelangelo himself could’ve carved a face and physique as near perfection as Suna’s, and the fact only your eyes got to feast upon the sight made it all the more attractive. He pulled your leggings off of you, your panties going with them. The feeling of being so bare in front of him was an interesting one. You would’ve expected that you were going to be more shy, more nervous about it, but it felt so right that you couldn’t have possibly felt that way. Suna bit his bottom lip as he looked down on you, admiring the sight of your nude body in front of him for what would be the first of many times.

“You’re fucking gorgeous, you know that?” He questioned before going down on you. While he wasn’t the biggest fan of his car, insisting it was a soccer mom car with way too much space than he would ever need, it seemed that the space was finally going to actually come in handy. You quite comfortably were laid out while he still had plenty of space to be between your legs. He placed soft, slow kisses on your inner thigh, each kiss heightening your need for him. By how wet you were it was obvious you were ready for him, and he wasted no time giving you what you wanted.

His lips latched onto your clit, sucking softly before he began licking long stripes between your folds. Chills ran down your spine, and moans started to slip from your mouth aimlessly. Suna’s tongue flicked over your clit, making you feel pleasure previously unbeknownst to you. Sure, guys had given you head before, and sure, it felt okay, but nobody had ever come close to being this good. It felt absolutely unreal, and the extent of your pleasure was potent in the way you said his name. Over and over again; Suna, Suna, Suna. Like a prayer desperate to be heard. And he loved hearing it, too. It was all he needed to know how good he was making you feel.

Your hips bucked toward his mouth as you began to chase your orgasm, the heat pooling in your core becoming hotter and hotter. You needed to cum and you needed it bad, and you needed him to give it to you. Suna slipped a finger into you, the second coming in quick succession. His mouth parted with you and his thumb began circling your most sensitive bud, so he could come up and loom over you.

“Feels good, doesn't it?” He asked, with a shit-eating grin on his face. He couldn't shake just how pretty he thought you looked like this, all desperate for him to please you. You nodded your head frantically, looking up at him with pure lust in your eyes.

“Ple-please make me cum, Suna.” You begged, much to his liking. He leaned down and kissed you gently, that same grin on his face as he pulled away. 

“Of course, baby. I’ll make you cum,” He prefaced before quickly removing his fingers from you, leaving you empty and with a ruined orgasm. You whined in frustration, confused as to why this was his course of action.

“But you’re gonna cum on my cock. Got it?” You nodded your head as Suna moved to take off his pants, finally letting his hardened erection spring free. You weren't sure what you had expected him to be packing, but the mere girth of him surpassed whatever you would've thought you were getting from him.

“Yes, sir.” You replied, causing Suna to chuckle lightly. He guided the tip of his member between your folds, lubing up with all the wetness that was already present. It was such a sight for him, one he had been wanting to entreat upon for a long, long time now. 

“That’s my good girl.” He praised before slowly starting to push into you. He took his time, not wanting to hurt you, but he had to admit the way you were clenching around him already was enough to drive him mad. He bottomed out soon enough, and you took him to the hilt. It felt so unbelievably good, and you gave him the okay to start moving. Suna kept his hands on your hips, keeping you steady as he began thrusting. Your eyes rolled back and your back arched, your body overwhelmed with pleasure. 

Your brain was kind of scrambled, hazy from how sensitive you were due to your previously denied orgasm, in conjunction with the high you were still on, but you could make out the song that had started to play. Own It by Drake, again, a pretty fitting song for the moment.

You’re still the one that I adore, ain’t much out there to have feelings for…

Both you and Suna had your passions, the things and people you cared about, but those lists were incredibly limited. There just wasn’t a lot that truly excited you. However, there had always been something that made you gravitate towards each other, something that made you need to be around each other, that caused you to be instrumental in each other's lives. Even if you wouldn't outwardly admit it, you adored each other.

Next time we fuck, I don’t wanna fuck, I wanna make love… 

But this time, you two were simply fucking. There was nothing more to it. It was raunchy, it was dirty, and little did you know, the fun was only just beginning for the both of you.

Suna kept his thrusts a bit on the slower side, much more concerned with how deep he was hitting than how fast he was going. It drove you absolutely wild, feeling every inch of him each time he moved. It was almost too much for you, your walls tightening around him more and more with even the slightest of moves he made.

“God damn, this slutty little cunt just can’t get enough of me, huh?” These words caught you completely off guard, you just wouldn’t expect Suna to say something so utterly vulgar, but admittedly, it turned you on way more than it probably should’ve. You shook your head lightly, looking him in the eyes, your gaze spilling over with desperation.

“N-need more.” You begged, much to Suna’s satisfaction. He smirked down at you, letting his right hand snake up your body and wrap around your throat while the left kept you firmly in place, with the entirety of his cock filling you up. 

“Cmon baby, you got better manners than that, don't you?” His tone was so divinely condescending, not really asking if you knew better, but insinuating you needed to. You were in no position to be anything but obedient, nor did your intentions differ. You wanted everything he had and were willing to do whatever it took to get it.

“Please, sir. I need more, I need it so bad.” You repeated, sounding even more desperate than you did before. By the look in his eyes you knew this was enough for Suna, who slowly pulled out of you. 

“Open your mouth.” He instructed, to which you immediately obeyed. He spat into your mouth, which you more than willingly accepted, a small smirk curling the corner of your lips as you swallowed. You were letting Suna know that he was in charge, and that you were there for him to use, his toy. He easily got the message, letting out a chuckle as he released his grip on your throat.

“Nasty little bitch.” 

Suna quickly turned you over onto your stomach, your face now pushed against the cold leather of the seats. His re-entry was quick, a soft squelch being heard as your walls greedily pulled his length right back in, giving you that oh-so euphoric feeling of being full once again. You moaned out loudly, a small yelp following at the unexpected spank he rained down on your ass. It was the first of many, while Suna simply enjoyed how you squirmed on him with each hit. 

After a fairly decent amount of spanking, enough to leave a deliciously painful sting on your skin, he started to fuck into you again. Suna’s slow strokes certainly weren't gentle, each seeming to hit deeper than the last, but this quickened pace turned that feeling up to a ten. Your mouth hung open as you took it all, moans and whines spilling out carelessly. Suna kept one hand firmly pressed onto the window for leverage, the other gripped hard on your waist, certainly enough to leave a light bruise. The sound of skin slapping with each of his thrusts rang through your head, and his grunts added atop that easily drowned out whatever music was playing. You much preferred this song, anyway.

“C’mere, ride me like the good little slut you are.” You didn't need to be told twice, as Suna pulled out and sat himself down you got yourself up and straddled him. You lined his tip up with your entrance, not lowering down onto him just yet, egging him on just to see how he would react. Fitting to what you expected, he grabbed onto your hips and forced you down, a surprised moan coming from you as your head fell onto his shoulder. 

“No no no, you don't get to tease me, whore. When I tell you to do something, you do it. Got it?” You nodded your head, letting out a small ‘yes sir’ in reply, too breathless to speak above a whisper. Suna’s hands gripped onto your ass as you started to ride him, bouncing on his length, circling your hips a bit every time you came down. 

Holding your orgasm back for this long was way more taxing than you would've thought it would be, your legs were shaking and your walls spasmed sporadically, desperate to finally get some relief. A pit of heat once again started to billow in your core, and you prayed you would finally get to cum.

“S-sir please, I need to cum...fuck, please let me cum.” The utter anguish in your voice did so much for Suna, knowing how much control he had over you and your pleasure turned him on more than anything else. He owned you, and he owned your orgasm, and you were both well aware of it. He was incredibly close himself, evident by how he started to pound up into you, matching the pace you had set. 

“Cum for me.” 

And you did. Almost instantly your high washed over you. You let out a moan that bordered on a scream as your juices spilled all over Suna’s dick. The spasms of your walls around his length made Suna cum as well, depositing a load out into you. For a while you two were fairly quiet, both catching your breath from what was undoubtedly the best orgasm either of you had had up until that point. 

You slowly got up and off of him, soreness almost immediately setting in now that you were empty. Suna ran a hand through his hair, fixing it up a bit before looking over at you. He motioned to his cock, a bit of a smirk still present on his lips. 

“Clean up your mess, baby.” You nodded at your instructions before leaning down, taking Suna’s length into your mouth. You licked up every last drop of both you and him, leaving nothing to waste. Once finished you popped your head up, wiping the corner of your mouth. Suna pulled you up and kissed you, placing a peck on your forehead as he pulled away. 

“So, you like me too?” You asked with a small smile. The answer to the question was more than blatantly obvious, but you still wanted to actually hear him say it.

“Of course I do, y/n. Everyone seemed to know but you, anyway.”

“And who is ‘everyone’, exactly?”

“Kita, Aran, the twins, you name it. Atsumu still won’t stop teasing me about not asking you out. Texts me every single day asking if we’re together yet.” 

With that in mind you picked up the shirt Suna had taken off, pulling it over your head before reaching up into the front cupholders to get your phone. He redressed himself fairly quickly, leaving a bit of his jacket unzipped at the top. You unlocked the device and started a Facetime with Atsumu, drumming your fingers on your thigh as you waited for an answer, making sure only you were in the frame.

“Hey! What’s up y/n, long time no see.” Atsumu greeted, giving you a smile and a wave. He was sat on his couch, a plate of sushi and a can of beer visible on the table where he had set his phone up.

“Yeah, it’s been a while. I was just calling to tell you he finally did it.” Atsumu looked at you a bit confused at first, but as you moved to get Suna in the frame as well it immediately clicked.

“Holy shit, thank god. I was getting tired of waiting, I was going to do it for him soon.” You let out a small chuckle, happy to see Atsumu was as bright as ever in his humor.

“Wait, hold on. Are you wearing his shirt? Did you guys fu-” Before he could finish the question Suna ended the call, shaking his head lightly.

“Yeah, I’m never gonna hear the end of that one.”

[kuraiandroger]

Diasomnia Relationship Headcanons

Basically what the title says, they’re my favorite dorm and I’ve projected on them a lot so I hope I’m not alone in how I see these dynamics </3 Enjoy!

 Lilia and Malleus

I see them as parent and child, even though Malleus seems to want to hide that sometimes. It’s probably because of his title and his age gap with the other children in the “family”  that maybe he feels embarrassed about Lilia doting on him, but oh well. I still see him as a child compared to Lilia (despite the fact that he literally is lol) because he seems to be a lot less present in the kids’ lives, and we’ve gotten several glimpses of his apparent emotional immaturity (Avoiding his problems, throwing “lightning tantrums”, sulking, etc). Paired with the fact that Lilia covers for him a LOT while still acknowledging these issues he has... I just can’t see them as equals lol. I only see a father and his very mildly unruly lol son. U_U It’s okay Malmal I know you’re trying your best.

Lilia and Silver

A rather similar relationship to Lilia and Malleus, to be honest. It’s just a lot more open, and I suspect that’s because Silver is sort of young and he doesn’t really have anyone else he’d rather run off with. His temperament is different than Malleus to an extent; Silver doesn’t strike me as a child with a single rebellious bone in his body, so he has no problems hanging out with and admiring his old man. I like to think Lilia had a very tender bond with both of his sons when they were infants, and some of that shows still in his relationship with Silver. They are just good ol dad and son (but really, dad, I’m fine with doing the cooking for tonight).

Lilia and Sebek

Sebek himself has called Lilia his mentor, and I really think that’s the basis of what they are, but I also think Lilia takes some of the liberty of acting like a dad to Sebek too sometimes. I believe Sebek was very present in Silver’s childhood so he is comfortable with Lilia’s authority. A good example of this was when Lilia told Sebek to use a quieter voice in Sam’s shop, much like the way a parent would scold their child lol. Sebek, too, while admittedly gullible, seems to heed Lilia’s advice with great respect, such as when he showed the other first years his secret natto ingredient that he’d heard was good from Lilia.

Malleus and Silver

Contrary to what most people think (due to Malleus’ status as Silver’s guardian), I don’t entirely see him as “Silver’s other dad.” Here’s where I start projecting lmao because I had a sibling who was many years older than me myself, so I sort of get the “older sibling who I respect because they are that much older than me but I also barely know them” vibe from these two. I am sure that Malleus took responsibility for Silver when needed, but it’s just really obvious to me that Lilia is the primary parent and Mal almost certainly looked to him for advice. I dunno, I could be completely wrong about this one, but I am just rather hung up on Lilia still viewing Malleus as his child despite the fact that he is long grown and therefore Malleus doesn’t seem to place the same priority on parenting Silver that Lilia does (which, yeah, I realize could very well be because of Malleus’ title and all). 

Some people have said it could’ve been out of respect, but I’ve also taken into account how little Silver seems to acknowledge Malleus as anything more than his liege (he didn’t even know very much about Malleus’ interest in gargoyles which....blows my mind a little lol) and really calls Lilia his father instead. There is a peculiar blend of comfort and distance between Malleus and Silver that I personally don’t entirely see as a parent-child dynamic </3. For the most part, I just see these two as distant age-gap siblings wherein the older one might’ve helped raise the younger one but was too much older than the younger sibling to really connect with them  (This could change during the Diasomnia chapter, but yeah). TL;DR: Distant older sibling Mal, as evidenced by Lilia’s much higher influence as the true “father” figure.

Malleus and Sebek

A pretty obvious lord-and-knight dynamic here lol. Malleus seems pretty indifferent to Sebek’s devotion, but Sebek still wants to impress him anyways. I’m sure Malleus just lets him do whatever because Sebek’s a little kid to him lmao

Silver and Sebek

This one! My favorite one! Their sibling-like dynamic really stands out to me because again, I have lived it lmao. I like to see them as a sibling rivalry because it’s very refreshing to see within a piece of media that also focuses on sibling characters that do get along (the Leeches, etc). These two tend to bicker, and they only hang out when they have to (such as when the whole family is together, or when they’re at their school club), and seem to have their own separate social lives despite knowing a lot about each other. I’ve noticed they also pick on each other for things the other cannot control (such as Sebek’s “annoying” voice, or Silver’s sleep disorder). As someone who has a sibling I really don’t get along with sometimes, it just hits home lol.

I’ve noticed that something else us bratty siblings will do, is tend to ignore any traits we have in common in favor of shaming the things we don’t share... Which is very much something that Sebek and Silver do to one another. In reality, I really do think they have rather similar personalities, but the fact that each one expresses it so differently causes them to fight (for example, Silver and Sebek are both very blunt but careful individuals, yet their level of enthusiasm for what they do is a source of conflict). Despite this, sibling rivalry-dynamic characters will still have moments where they get along, such as when they share an activity, like swordfighting.

I like to think that while Sebek is quite literally just Silver’s childhood friend, they have reached a level of comfort (and annoyance) with one another after years of growing up together that their dynamic manifests the way argumentative siblings do, and I love that for them.

---

SOOO uh, thank you for reading if you did! This is my first text post in a really long time, please be nice to me if you happen to disagree with any of this, it’s just headcanons! Sorry if it’s a bit wordy at times too, I like to shove as much in as I can. </3 Anywho, we’ll get a better scope when Diasomnia’s chapter releases someday, haha. 

[invisibleinorange]

Swelter Weather  | 7/?

Chapters: 7/? Fandom: Bridgerton Rating: M Warnings: None at this point. Relationships: Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington,  Eloise Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington(besties),  Bridgerton Family Dynamics, Marina Thompson/Phillip Crane, Eloise Bridgerton/Phillip Crane, Kate Sheffield/Anthony Bridgerton, Daphne Bridgerton/Simon Hastings Characters: Colin Bridgerton,  Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton, Phillip Crane, Benedict Bridgerton, Daphne Bridgerton, Additional Tags:  Bridgerton, Polin

Summary: Colin Bridgerton is weary from travel and decides to spend the summer at the Aubrey Hall. While his initial plans were to avoid his perfect family, he ends up sharing the house with Eloise and Penelope. This is a Modern AU!

If it weren’t for the fact it would have disturbed the warm, soft body curled into to him, Colin wouldn’t have hesitated to get up and shut the curtains to stop the sun from filling his room.  He had zero interest in leaving his room or her though.

It was the strangest thing.  He’d never really craved someone’s company as much as hers. There had been people who had inspired less than gentlemanly thoughts in him.  There were many times he’d considered giving into those desires but not once had he wanted more than those things with those other women.

He wanted everything with Penelope and that was why he’d forced himself to take a step back, to make sure that he was doing things the right way with her.  He couldn’t possibly be happier than he was to hold her tight or listen to the little sounds she made in her sleep.

He’d always thought she was beautiful but seeing her at peace, lost in dreams only made him think her more beautiful. He dare say she was the most beautiful person in the world and she was his.  The novelty of the thought of it hadn’t worn off nor did he think that it ever would.

He was admittedly a little nervous about how Eloise might react to the news that they were together but he knew things would be okay. Eloise would come around. She always did.

He pushed all thoughts of his sister from his mind as he buried his face into Penelope’s messy red curls, closing his eyes as if to push away the morning and extend this bliss a little longer.

He smiled when he saw her eyes flicker open and her own tired smile form across her face.  Penelope wasn’t shy about snuggling into him all the more.  It was funny how intimate they could be despite the fact he hadn’t let them complete intimacy.

“Do you think Eloise would buy me still feeling ill and us needing to stay in here all day?” she murmured quietly.

“Not a chance,” he told her with a laugh.  Eloise definitely wouldn’t just leave them be unless she was explicitly told to.

Neither of them were any particular hurry to get up.  Colin knew his stomach would eventually betray him and demand breakfast would strike but for now, he just wanted to savor the moment.

In fact, he was pretty sure he could smell bacon permeating from the kitchen. Normally that would have sent him wandering down to try and get first dibs but times were changing.  His desire to keep cuddling Penelope trumped any food craving.

“I can’t believe she’s already up,” Penelope murmured, apparently smelling the bacon too. She sighed at the thought they were probably going to have to get up and show their face downstairs. “She’s not even a morning person.”

“I could always go down and make a big plate,” Colin said after a moment.  “Breakfast in bed?... All day in bed with me.”

“I’d be crazy to say no to that,”  she murmured leaning to steal a kiss before he could get up, which honestly made him not want to get up. He pushed himself up and out from under the comforter with a sigh.

Eloise was going to have to deal with him coming down in pajama bottoms and no shirt.  This was as dressed as he was going to get.

“You just stay right there,” he said with a grin. “I’ll deal with Eloise.”

--

Colin fully intended to grab a plate of food and tell Eloise to find something else to do today.  He had the whole thing prepared in his head, carefully crafted to deal and then escape back to his blissful little bubble.

His mind went blank when he made it down the kitchen and didn’t just fine his sister.  His eyes widened slightly at the sight of Phillip helping her make breakfast.

He watched for a long moment, trying to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating things. Phillip was a little bit too comfortable for his liking and the protective older brother in him debated whether he ought to punch his friend or start asking questions.

He cleared his throat loudly, an act he hoped to split up whatever was happening.  Eloise didn’t even have the modesty to look embarrassed by this whole thing though.

“How’s Pen?” she asked a little too casually. “Still feeling under the weather?”

The mention of Penelope did bring his mission back to mind. He was supposed to be grabbing plates and heading back up stairs.  His mind was flailing trying to figure out what exactly he was supposed to be doing at this point.

“- I was coming to get her a plate,”  Colin said, eyeing Eloise and Phillip suspiciously.  “Clearly it was too late last night and you offered Phillip one of the other guest rooms.”

“Not exactly,”  Eloise said sheepishly.

Colin knew that look. He’d seen it on their older brothers plenty of times after they’d brought random girls back in the past.  He clenched his fist. He was going to murder Phillip Crane.

“What do you mean by that?” he asked despite the fact he had zero business doing it.

“Well, you could say that he was ill and I took care of him,” Eloise said crossing her arms. She definitely knew that Penelope hadn’t been ill and she definitely knew Penelope was in his bed at the moment.

“I didn’t -  we literally slept,” Colin said defensive over his own actions.

“I really should get going,” Phillip said clearly not wanting to get in the middle of family drama.  “It seems like you two have things to talk about.”

Both Bridgerton heads turned and said ‘no’ in unison. This really did have to stop becoming a thing.  They didn’t wait to see that he was staying though as they were busy squaring off.

“You invited him to distract me so you could fuck my best friend,” Eloise said in an accusatory voice.

“I’m still here,” Phillip felt a need to interject.

“Oh dear,” a fourth voice said from the doorway. Penelope had apparently heard the voices and decided to come mediate. She raised an eyebrow at the presence of Phillip.  That was a turn.

She moved closer to Phillip and shook her head, giving a consolatory smile.  “There is really no getting in the middle of these things. You just have to let them fight it out. You’ll learn.”

“I didn’t fuck her,” Colin argued. “We are together though, no thanks to you and your constant need to get in the middle.”

“You’re a liar and a hypocrite,” Eloise said right back.

“I’m neither. But you have no business sleeping with people that you don’t even know, especially not when you’re –“

“I wasn’t,”  Eloise said shaking her head. “I’m not a child.  I have just as much right as you do to invite whoever I want here. I like Phillip.”

“He’s literally years older than you and he has kids,” Colin argued.

Phillip wasn’t sure whether he should be offended or not but Penelope gave him a sympathetic glance,  reached to grab a filled plate handing him one so they could at least eat breakfast while watching and making sure blood wasn’t drawn in this fight.

“You’re a few years older than Penelope,” Eloise argued.

“That’s different.”

“How is it different?”

“Because I love her,” he said talking with his hands. “I’ve literally been in denial for years and you’re really going to falsely equate hooking up with some guy you’ve known all of two seconds to me wanting to be with Penelope.”

“You what?” Penelope interjected, nearly choking on her bacon. Phillip had to give her a pat on the back to stop the coughing.

“I thought you said we weren’t to interject,” Phillip murmured.

“Well when people say they love you get to interject,” Penelope murmured.

Eloise shook her head, narrowed her eyes.  “I don’t need to travel the world to figure out what I want,” she said pointedly.  “Don’t try to get in the middle of it with this big brother nonsense and I’ll get out of your way.”

“Really?” Colin asked after a long moment, slightly unsure whether he’d won this argument or not, especially since Eloise was going to let him be with Penelope without trying to stop it, if he got out of her way.

“I mean, she’s still my best friend and I will hurt you if you hurt her but she’s also an adult and clearly she is a willing victim.”

“I wouldn’t really go with victim,” Colin said after a moment, remembering there was food now that things were at least semi-decided. His gaze finally moved over to where Penelope and Phillip had been standing, eating and watching.  He offered a small smile. “Girlfriend is the term we’re going with these days. Speaking of which, we’re going back upstairs.”

Eloise made a face at that.

“At least me and Phillip will be able to keep our breakfast down,” she said to their retreating backs as they disappeared just as easily as they’d interrupted her morning.

[arc-saber]

The Way Forward - Did I write a Mandalorian Fic?

I fic-ing did.  Or part of it.  Look.  I was bored and I’m almost always thinking about Star Wars.  It was bound to happen.

No, but really.  I’m not really a fanfic writer.  I’m not great at it.  and clearly, I start with a single, stupid idea and get side-tracked until I have a WAY TOO LONG bit of story.  But my main pet peeve about a lot of fic is inconsistent characterization.  So then I was like “WELL CAN U DO ANY BETTER, SMARTASS?”  Answer?  Mmnnmmnsssnng? I dunno.  We’ll see.

Din Djarin finds himself in a predicament some years after parting ways with Grogu.  Someone unexpectedly shows up to help.  I W0ndEr WhO!?  

Forgive my lazy backstory-ing... Story below the cut.

PART I

The Dark Saber.  It had once been described to him as a symbol more than an item of power on its own.  But its history said otherwise.  It was both.  The ancient blade was not only a feat of engineering that wedded ancient sorcery and Mandalorian tactical sense, but it was the manifestation of power on Mandalore itself.  It had been forged, stolen, retrieved, lost and found again — its past was as dynamic as the story of Mandalore itself.  

But today it was a tool and Din Djarin was using it to cut a hole in a scrapped hull so that he didn’t burn to death in a sudden deluge of acid rain.

The screeching metal and insulation giving way to the unyielding blade manifested on his helmet’s HUD as static while the rest of his feed grew grainy with sensor damage from the rain.  Very technically, Din had known what he was getting into when he arrived on Lotho Minor, but he hadn’t been presented with a lot of options during the chaotic spiral landing he’d been forced into by his pursuers.  It bothered him that he hadn’t known their affiliation and it was a troubling indictment of his life that there were too many groups with cause to target him as a general mark to make an educated guess … let alone the number of people scattered across the galaxy who had cause to target him specifically.  It also bothered him that he didn’t know if these particular pursuers had broken off when he’d plunged into the junk planet’s acidic atmosphere.  Or if it was personal and they had followed him to the surface.

With a heavy kick, he toppled his impromptu door into the cavity of the  remains of a freighter and plunged inside after it.  His armor had deflected most of the acid damage, but everywhere that beskar wasn’t was smoking and starting to sting as the rain soaked through the padding.  He knew he should strip off what he could and try to allow it to dry, but after depositing himself with gravity against the far bulkhead, he was having trouble finding the will to move just yet.  

About two clicks away, his shabby X4 gunship was little more than a smoking heap — his less than graceful descent having caused some pretty severe hull damage, not to mention now whatever connectors the rain was melting away.  So unless he could miraculously a) find the parts he needed buried in Lotho Minor’s literal mountains of scrap or b) even more miraculously find an operational ship to get himself off the surface, he was stranded.  Letting his head tilt back wearily, he let out a sigh that felt like it had risen up in him like a bubble through pitch.  He was tired.  He had been tired for three years — possibly longer than that — but when he’d been caught up in the concern for someone other than just himself, it had distracted him from it.  His people.  Then of course the kid.  He sighed again, feeling as though the first hadn’t quite reset him as much as he needed.  He should be relieved to only be responsible for his own skin again; what would he do here if he was also trying to keep a helpless child alive along with him?  But the fact remained: whenever that brief time he’d spent as the child’s guardian crossed his mind, he missed it.  Missed Grogu.  

He didn’t know why lately in particular the odd little sorcerer had crossed his mind so often, but now hardly a night passed when he didn’t factor into Din’s fitful dreams somehow.  Most of it was pure memory, but some seemed different — moments when he felt like he was being reached for.  It was probably a result of wishful thinking.  And right now, wallowing was not going to fix his situation.  When he’d either sat out the worst of the acid evaporating, or simply dulled to the sting of it, he laboriously reached for the lightrod that was tucked into his belt.  Raising it over his head, he could just make out the shapes of the ship’s interior by its meager glow.  Most of what was left of the freighter had been picked clean by whatever locals there were here.  Staying put would give him shelter, but nothing more than that.  He lowered the lightrod again, disappointed, and pushed himself back to his feet.  His unceremonious entry had granted him about a three foot opening through which he could now peek out and try to assess the weather.

A flash of movement and light bouncing off a metallic barrel was all the warning he got.  Din jerked himself back behind the hull, milliseconds before a red blast scored the metal right next to his head.  Falling back with a grunt, he wedged himself into the dark as much as he could while drawing his own blaster.  He checked the charge.  Decent.  Outside, the sound of footsteps had distinguished from the rain just enough for him to guess at two pursuers.  He edged back to the opening and did a quick double glimpse, ducking down as he popped his head out the second time, lining up a shot with the movement he saw.  Two figures. Humanoid for the most part and well equipped against the hostile environment in full vac suits.  “Dank — “ Another blast lit up the hull briefly overhead.  “Ffffarrik.”

His free hand went to the hilt that hung at his belt.  He could stay here and deplete his charge trying to take them both out before either got to him… or use the blade in the one capacity it had that had never failed him.  Intimidation.  Din could use a sword.  He could use pretty much anything.  But it wasn’t his first choice.  If the Dark Saber was any other blade, he wouldn’t consider it, but the few times he’d ignited it, the effect was notable.  Most people didn’t know exactly what it was, but they knew enough that they didn’t want to try to fight it.  Maybe that was part of the reason he hadn’t dumped it down a canyon somewhere for Bo-Katan Kryze to go find on her own.  It had caused him enough trouble over the past few years that that would make the most sense.  Yet he held onto it and because of that, had suffered not a few varied encounters with Kryze and her clan and their attempts to force him into a tradition and history he knew nothing about and found he didn’t care for.  That wasn’t his path — his way.  It was something else entirely that had, before it knew him, labelled him a zealot.

He ignited the saber in his off hand, keeping his blaster at the ready.  They were close now, but they had slowed down in the absence of return fire, approaching  his shelter with caution.  They would crowd to one side of the opening, one coming in first to provide cover, the second following up with the needed accuracy.  Sure enough, he felt the hull vibrate as his pursuers flattened themselves against it. With little time, Din stepped back to give himself enough room to plunge the dark blade straight through the hull at about where he figured the second body would be.  It met some affirming resistance and a modulated shout of shock came from the other pursuer.  Din had hoped the sight of the blade would have scared off the remaining enemy, but with a stubborn war cry, the other was suddenly upon him, having whipped around the opening with a barrage of blasts chasing Din chaotically back to the back wall.  When he felt one ricochet off his beskar, he’d lunged forward into a roll, losing the hilt of the Dark Saber in the process, but coming up at an advantageous position to fire his blaster.  

A direct hit.  He saw the flare of energy meeting his enemy’s breastplate and had almost enough time to lower his blaster with a spin towards the holster before the full weight of his attacker plowed into him.  Confusion barely had a moment to sink in before he realized his error.  He wasn’t the only one in beskar.  Now this up close and personal, he could see the vac suit peeling away from the coated breastplate of Mandalorian armor.  He only had a very brief moment to gasp out an admittedly daft:  “What — ?” before the second attacker, proving to not be as skewered as he’d have liked, flung themselves into the opening, one injured arm hanging at their side, but the other wielding a blaster in an attempt to train on Din amid his grapple with the other.  

“Wait— wait!” but they weren’t there to talk.  He knew precisely what they were there for, and it was laying on the ground a few feet from any of them.  Din had tried to yield the Dark Saber before.  A few times, actually.  But its inherent rules seemed to have cornered the clans, and him, into a more deadly negotiation for it.  They would take it when he was maimed or dead.  So now he would just as soon they didn’t take it.  His attempts at getting their attention had only earned him a hard elbow to the neck, tossing him effectively into survival mode.  With an uncomfortable twist of the body, he got a foot up on the bulkhead behind him and activated his jetpack. The unexpected surge caught his attacker off guard and plowed both of them straight out the opening, into the second shooter and rolled them for several yards along the littered ground.  

The impact of their landing flung them apart, but the advantage of that for Din was an advantage for all of them and he was still outnumbered when he rolled to his feet, blaster raised.  He swapped his aim from one to the other of his attackers, trying to give the impression that he had both of them covered at once while they simply had to train their blasters on him and start to close in slowly.  “Are you with Bo-Katan?” he called out, hoping to get at least one talking.  They did pause, but the grim chuckle told him he’d not only guessed wrong, but he also might have encountered a rival of Bo-Katan’s for the throne of Mandalore.  “Of course.”  

The prospect that he might die here — on a literal garbage planet — only filled him with weary resignation.  But then — for just a moment — immense disappointment as he suddenly remembered a promise he’d made to Grogu as they parted.  “Sorry, kid,” he murmured to himself as he stood on the brink of lowering his head and his weapon.

But the two others had stopped and craned around, one rapidly looking back at Din as if they suspected whatever he’d murmured had just summoned a problem for them.  Unbeknownst to them, it was simply his outlandishly bad luck that had summoned a problem for all of them.

With a shriek like wrending metal — and indeed that was probably partially what it was — one of the mountains of scrap that had previously been looming over them, gave a violent buck, smaller bits of scrap now joining the acid that pelted them, shaking free from the towering metal monster that emerged and resolved into a four legged, open-mawed form that seemed to be made of the planet’s refuse itself, but fuelled by an oily hot fire from within its belly.  As it swung around, a pronged foot came inches from flattening Din where he stood.  He reeled back from the monstrous intrusion, no longer able to see his previous two attackers while he scrambled to get away from the brand new horror making itself his problem.

No words. No thoughts. Just survival as he reflexively activated his jetpack again and pushed off at an acute angle front he ground and away from the beast as it dove past him, mouth gaping for an improbable bite of pure scrap metal from the side of one of the hills.  Perhaps the monster itself was distracted by its meal, but the teetering hillside caved and an avalanche of spare parts was suddenly rolling down from higher than even Din’s current altitude.  Bits and pieces rang as they bounced off his armor and he strove to outrun the larger chunks he knew were coming.  He managed to dodge the caved in hull of what looked to be part of a Mon Calamari cruiser, but found himself straight in the path of an untold tonnage of metal that was soon sweeping him out of the air and along with it in a tumble of junk that splayed out between the hills like a river of metal… and then in a breathless moment, charged straight over the edge of a dark ravine, carrying Din down with it.

[the-fandom-fuckup]

A bit more for that modern fantasy au I teased a bit ago

Character designs n stuff are slightly based off the official halloween n fantasy ending arts, plus whatever else I wanted to do, so Kiri is a dragon shifter here, Baku is a werewolf, n Ochako is a witch.

There'll probably be a hint of a/b/o dynamics here for weres n shifters, n the idea of alpha!Kiri n alpha!Baku has stuck to me like glue, so that's a thing here also

There's no real plot for this, just these three being dumb n pining, and everyone around them rolling their eyes n dealing with it lmao

I've thought about jobs n first meetings tho, n came up with this. Kiri's a firefighter (along with Tetsu, who is also a dragon shifter, bc I love him and their bro-bond), bc big fire resistent boy running into fires to help people just makes sense. Also I really like the thought of him in the uniform

Ochako works as a self defense instructor with Gunhead at a small gym in town, probably helping people with magic items n stuff on the side for extra cash or smth, I dunno. She might wanna move into a more magically dominant field one day, but she likes the environment of the gym n the regulars that come in n chat between classes. She's also very good at what she does n has put many assholes in their place after they've scoffed at "the cute little girl you have here".

Baku is a "park ranger", n I use quotations bc that's the only title he could really give himself to have any authority over the land he owns. He gives himself more leeway than what some laws may grant, tho tbh if you're coming into his territory with intent to harm those in it, you're lucky to walk away at all just sayin'

He runs an escape park of sorts for weres n shifters to run around during full moons and other times they need to shed their human skin, personally owned so he can avoid all the bullshit regulations n "safety procedures" found in bigger places that try offering the same thing, but ultimately make the shifting process shittier than it needs to be. And words gets around so it gets super popular super fast, n people of all ages come by

Tbh the thought of a teeny tiny wolf, like 10y/o at most running around Baku n trying to get him to play, nipping at his ankles n calling him the pack alpha is really what settled the debate on whether he should be an alpha or omega. And the added image of Baku rolling his eyes n putting on his toughass act but not really minding it as he gets them moving with a tap on the ass, muttering "Fuckin told ya squirt, I'm not your pack alpha. Now find someone else's ankles to bite at, I'm busy", makes me feel really nice

For some first meetings, tbh Kiribaku probably happens first, n they meet when Kiri n Tetsu accidentally trespass on Baku's territory bc they're new to the area n found a big ass lake to soak in during a flight over town, like dude!! Fuck yea that could fit both of us easy, man I haven't soaked in my big form in forever lets go!

And ofc if the giant shadows overhead hadn't tipped him off the security sensors would've so Baku's like who in the FUCK!! N storms off to confront them bc you don't just come on his land like that. That's how people get fucking hurt you dumb assholes 😤😤

N Kiri n Tetsu are mostly just minding their own business, settling down into the lake like aw yea that's the shit, almost passing out bc they'd just had a long day n the water was so cool n the fish eatting the dead skin n shit off their scales was so relaxing. They don't even realise they'd drifted into a light doze when they hear furious snarling n harsh sniffing coming their way, n barely have enough time to get up before Baku comes tearing shit through the trees

And like. Kiri n Tetsu know that they're big boys. Their full sized dragon forms are huge n there's not much out there that scares them, but nobody likes coming face to face with a snarling werewolf, standing in their territory without any warning that you maybe shouldn't be there

Despite the hostile intro, it doesn't take much for the misunderatanding to be cleared up. There's a lot of apologies from Kiri n Tetsu n a lot of irritated snorts from Baku, but they get straightened out. Baku tells them what kinda show he's running n Kiri inatantly get sparkly eyes like dude!! You do that all by yourself?! That's so manly bro you gotta let us help with that

Baku snorts like you don't have to make empty offers if you wanna use the grounds, I don't refuse people unless they pose an actual threat to the others. You guys aren't dangerous, just stupid. N Kiri goes hey rude, but also it's gotta be a lot dealing with all that on your own. We can at least watch out from above, keep an eye on shit or whatever bc face it man, you may be great but even you can't be in multiple places at once.

And the only reason Baku ends up agreeing is bc they pester him about it until he's well past irritated, n he's figured out the only way to shut them up was concede. They can't be there fulltime anyway consudering their professions, but they're sure to help when they can

Kirichako meet at the gym. Kiri's buying a membership or smth bc you gotta keep the stength up bro! Can't be slacking when you're the difference between someone living n someong dying y'know? Ochako's either in a class or dealing with some hothead, her furrowed brows n puffed cheeks distracting Kiri n reminding him of a chipmunk before bud says smth he can't hear but has Ochako seeing red. It doesn't take long for him to end up on his ass n Kiri's just stuck watching, jaw dropped n heart eyes as Ochako tells the guy he can either fix his attitude or find somewhere else to go

Kiri turns to Tetsu like dude holy shit did you see that?? N Tetsu's like yea bro everyone saw it, n Ochako comes up to them like sorry about that. We have a no harassment policy here that some people overstep, n it sucks that we get people coming in that need it enforced but unfortunately it's pretty common.

Then, bc she's still a bit sour, she looks them both dead in the eyes with a fire raging behind hers like if that's not smth you think you can handle then you might as well save us all the hassle n leave now. N they're both like no way that was great, totally understandable, just tell us where to sign

And while she came off as kinda aggressive during their initial meet, Kiri's quick to find she has just as much sweetness to match her bite. He watches her between sets sometimes n sees how kind n gentle she can be with the younger classes that come in, how she doesn't single out people who struggle n instead moves to help n provide tips without making a huge deal of it

She's also one of the first people to come running when someone gets hurt, he finds out. He'd admittedly been more focused on her sparring with Gunhead than he'd been on the super heavy equipment he was using for his reps, n managed to look over at the perfect time to get flustered n drop it directly on his foot. The resounding crack was loud enough to catch quite a bit of attention, tho he knows the equipment is more likely to be damaged than his foot

Ochako doesn't even hesitate to run over n levitate him to take the pressure off of his not broken foot, going "oh my god are you okay?? Someone clear that bench please, he needs to get off his feet now!" N Kiri does appreciate the concern, as embarassing as it may be, n tries to tell her it's really not a big deal, thanks for the help but honestly--

N she rounds on him like say that one more time n you'll be dealing with a broken nose instead, now sit your ass down n let me handle this!! Kiri can't even reply with anything other than a quiet okay😳😳 bc he's always thought her determination was super admirable, but being this close n seeing it burn in her eyes so intensely is taking it to a whole new level n he has no clue how to handle it

Kacchako meeting is kind of a hybrid mix of the other two combined lmao. Baku owns a pack house where he lives with Deku, then later with Kiri, Tetsu, Mina, Kami, n Sero, but he's so busy with the park that he's hardly ever home. N since Ochako's kinda embarassed about her tiny ass appartment, they usually hang out at the pack house to talk over magic studies or gossip over whatever's happened recently. At this point Baku n Ochako have heard of each other but never been around at the same time

Which causes a problem one day while Ochako's in the kitchen making tea when Baku comes home. He'd had a stressful day warding off poachers or smth, n his rut's just a few days away now, so when he opens the door n is greeted with a slightly unfamiliar scent it sends him into a daze, where he stalks to the kitchen before he even knows that he's moving

Ochako knows tho, can hear the low growls and deliberately quiet steps creeping behind her, setting her on edge bc ohhhh my god, someone just broke into Deku's place holy shit!! And when it gets close enough to barely feel hot breath on the back of her neck she's flinging herself into action, all muscle memory as she gets a few quick jabs into Baku's gut. It knocks the question outta his lungs, getting out a choked "who the--" before her magic kicks in and she's picking him up n slamming him down with his weight returned for maximum momentum, body slamming the following "fUCK!!" out as well before she placed her weight on him to keep him down. She gets right in his face demanding "who are you?! How did you get in here?!"

And when he can breathe again Baku snaps back like "who tf am I?!? I live here!! Who tf are you?!?!" And like, she's still in fight mode so she's looking him over like hmm, so this is Bakugou. Then she realises wtf she's doing n goes oh my god it's Bakugou!! N she's jumping off him and apologising so fast that she's barely saying words, trying to take his hands n help him back up but getting swatted away bc you've done enough touching don't you think??

And yea, Baku's kinda pissed. Being attacked in your own house does that to anyone, let alone a pre-rut alpha. But also, he's kinda impressed, bc he can count on one hand the amount of people who've gotten the drop on him like that, but he'd rather die than admit it out loud. So he just huffs at her with a final "try that shit again n I'll kill you", n stalks off to his room, having more important things to worry about right then than who's fucking around in his kitchen

((His rut decides to be completely unhelpful that time around, his alpha brain locking in on the faint perfume she'd left on his shirt while tossing him around and how perfectly it mixed with his own scent, as well as the shirt he nabbed from Kiri's laundry basket the night before. He rubs the scents of these strong potential mates all over his den, knots his rut aid with his face plastered to the shirts then uses it to scent the shirts even more, drunk off of how well their scents all mix together. He's rightfully embarassed during the end when he can start thinking properly again n throws both shirts to the back of his closet to be forgotten about--as much as his alpha fights him on it--n moves on to his business like normal.

Tho if he tries to be home more often when he knows Ochako's coming around, n spends more time in Kiri's space, nobody's mean enough to comment on it. At least, not at first.))

Man I have many feelings about this, but I'll leave it here for now bc I could go on forever

[gothic-safari-clown]

The Mind’s Power Over the Body

Part 17: From Protector to Pathetic

Story summary: They only ever had each other. It had been that way since high school, ever since Elianna transferred to dreary Arlen and took Jonathan under her wing. They go separate ways for college, and when they're reunited at Arkham Asylum professionally, Elianna comes to find that they've both changed during their time separated. Can she look past the promise of danger and stay by Jonathan's side as they slide further and further into the darkness while she grapples to come to terms with the truth about herself? Can she accept what needs to be done in order to hold onto the only person who holds any meaning in her life? This is a very self-indulgent AU that draws from several different canons of the DCU and ignoring others, starting in the Batman Begins Nolanverse. This will follow the plot of the movie, although the timeline has been very slightly tweaked.

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Part 13 / Part 14 / Part 15 / Part 16

Word count: 1580

A/N: 👀😗 I hope you all like angsty cliches as much as I dooooo!

It seemed to Jonathan that Elianna had learned from her first experience with the fear toxin. While she still fell unconscious once it began to wear off, the effects didn't last as long, and in lieu of frightened screaming, she had managed to restrict herself to quieter sounds of terror.

Upon seeing his friend's distress diminish as her eyelids grew heavy, Jonathan unfastened the restraints and took the belt from her mouth. When he turned his attention back to her, he found that El had already curled in on her side; she would twitch every few seconds, each one accompanied by a soft whimper, whether from perceived pain or from fear he couldn't tell.

Even so, he once again felt pride well up in him as her body relaxed more and more. He was surprised to find that she was still barely lucid when he laid down and pulled the blankets over them. Magnet-like, she was suddenly tucked against him, seeking warmth. Once the shock by the speed of her movement wore off, he allowed himself a tiny smile and secured his arms around her as Scarecrow piped up with his usual assortment of vulgar persuasion; easily ignored at this point.

Elianna finally relaxed into a deep, exhausted sleep, the material of Jonathan's shirt bunched up in her hand.  He was very quickly growing reaccustomed to her unconscious insistence for closeness in her sleep. He found his fingertips skimming up and down her arm lightly as his thoughts returned to the execution of the attack on Gotham.

Admittedly, Elianna's insistent reminder of all that he had accomplished in the process took away much of the stress and replaced it with a sense of premature victory, which was very welcome in comparison. Jonathan found himself slipping into sleep more quickly than he had in a long time.

.xXx.

That didn't last for very long, however, as he was tugged back into semi-consciousness after a few short hours by El shifting uncomfortably in her sleep while muttering to herself. Jonathan blinked in the darkness (he had forgotten to turn on the bathroom light, damn), trying to bring her face into focus. He had only barely made out her furrowed brow and defiant frown when her voice began to raise, along with her poorly coordinated movements.

Jonathan had long been accustomed to soothing her back into sleep without waking her up when she had nightmares (which was concerningly often), but this one was clearly escalating faster than he could wake himself up.

That was, until whatever she was experiencing reached a crescendo, and she bolted upright, sucking in a deep, shuddering breath, followed by a short cry of torment. In an instant, Jonathan found himself next to her, his hand on her back. Instinctively, she leaned into the touch, pressing sideways into his chest with another anguished sob as her friend tried desperately to unscramble his tired brain.

This was troubling, to say the least. Generally speaking, El didn't really cry. Not like that, anyway. She hated to cry; she considered it a 'waste of energy,' in her own words. Even when she had occasion to, it was usually just a quiet tear or two and didn't hinder whatever else she may be doing.

But sitting there, listening to his friend actually sob in earnest, Jonathan found himself getting worried. Quietly shushing her (what the hell is that going to do, idiot?), he put a hand on the back of her head to hold her in place as she sucked in another shuddering breath.

"Breathe, El, breathe." She didn't respond, but she did make a second, slightly more successful attempt to take in a normal breath. "That's it; everything is fine." Jonathan cursed the brusqueness of his voice, still barely awake enough to even speak, let alone police his tone. "It's okay," he tried again—better.

Gradually, El's breathing evened out, but she continued to cling to Jonathan like a lifeline, trembling. Once again, he found himself disturbed by the extreme reaction; this was not normal.

Eventually, she sat back up, still shivering and with tear tracks just beginning to dry on her face, which bore no expression as she stared blankly forward at the opposite wall. Jonathan waited patiently for her to speak first; his hand had returned to her back, still uneasy.

However, he was comforted when she finally let out a frustrated sigh, disgusted by her own lack of control. "Round two nightmares are a bitch," she offered flimsily. Caught off guard, he couldn't help an amused scoff.

"Clearly."

"I can't remember the last time I cried like that, ugh," she wiped at her face, all fear replaced with frustration. "That was so annoying. I'm sorry." The apology was punctuated with an awkward half-laugh as she feigned confidence. It wasn't convincing, however, as she wouldn't look at him as she spoke. "Go back to sleep; I'm just going to get some water."

Jonathan considered joining El in the kitchen as she shambled in the direction of the kitchen, but he was just...so tired... Surely a moment to herself would do her some good anyway.

Once in the kitchen, Elianna flicked on the light and took a moment to brace herself against the counter as she scrambled to compose herself. What a stupid situation. She was no stranger to nightmares, having often been plagued by them for her entire life. So why was this one so different?

She knew why. Being in such proximity to Jonathan again had not only stirred up old worries but had given them new form as well. When he had first confessed to her his situation with Granny, many of her dreams had depicted her finding him dead somewhere, pecked to death by crows, or starved to death, or any other horrible possibility.

But their dynamic had shifted so much since they were teenagers. Whereas back then, she had been the protector, their roles had been reversed drastically, and as such, her Jonathan-fueled nightmare had borne a very different image.

Doing her best not to think about it, El finally filled a glass of water and drank it slowly.

In the meantime, Jonathan was facing a dawning realization of guilt. In all of the times that she had been woken by a nightmare when he was around, Elianna had never...snapped like that before. She had blamed it on the toxin, and maybe that was true to an extent, but he was sure that the impending attack on Gotham had played a larger part.

And the only reason she was even in the city was that he had selfishly orchestrated for her to be there. If he had just ignored the application on Warden Sharpe's desk, she was sure to still be in California, bored but safe. As such, he felt a sense of responsibility for her continued wellbeing, and to his mind, this episode made clear what a dismal job he was doing. She was even smoking again, for God's sake.

When she ambled back into the bedroom a few minutes later, Jonathan had resumed a horizontal position, one elbow covering his eyes. Thinking he had fallen back asleep and not wanting to wake him again, El crept back onto her side of the bed carefully.

It was just another nightmare. Just go back to sleep, she commanded herself, shaking off the remaining worry. Just another really intense, very real feeling, vivid, horrible nightmare, she thought grimly as she remembered flashes of what she had seen.

The city in chaos, fire, destruction, screaming, pain; Jonathan standing over her, watching as she begged for help ("please, don't leave me here, you promised!") before he walked off, leaving her alone, injured, and at the mercy of the panicked, violent citizens of what used to be Gotham...

A movement from the other side of the bed startled her out of her thoughts as she released her breath from her tight chest. Blinking through the darkness, she saw that the arm that had been previously thrown over Jonathan's face was now stretched out between them.

"Come on, you know you're going to end up over here anyway," came his tired voice by way of invitation. After a moment's hesitation, El obeyed and once again found herself tucked up against her friend's torso. "So, what happened?" Jonathan asked as his arm wrapped around her and felt a sharp intake of breath from the redhead.

"It doesn't matter." He waited patiently for her to elaborate. "I already know you wouldn't leave me behind." Oh. Almost subconsciously, he squeezed her tighter.

"No, I wouldn't." The finality in his tone did well to reassure El and quell the final remnants of her apprehension.

"No, of course not. Doesn't matter," she murmured to herself, holding him close.

"Doesn't matter," Jonathan repeated affirmatively, clearly drifting back to sleep judging by his voice, and El found herself at last in a similar state. She hummed a response and kissed his shoulder before the pair finally slipped back into slumber.

[jincherie]

tentacledipity | four

tentacledipity | four

➛pairing: jimin x reader

➛genre: alien au, space au, soulmate au, wanted au, smut (coming)

➛rating: sfw

➛words: 8.1k

➛warnings: none! well, a sprinkle of grinding and tentacle mentions but other than that *shrugs*

➛notes: finished this in the early hours of the morning so please dont mind any spelling or grammar mistakes if there are any pls & thank u!! also thank u for being so patient, uni isn’t kicking my ass per se but it’s definitely taking up a lot of my time these days! i hope u all like the next does of tentacle adventures!

ps; I will add links at a later date! pls enjoy & lmk what u think!

This tale starts, as any good fiction does, with a girl crash landing on a foreign planet. And, like any good fiction, it follows a theme of serendipitous happening, and tentacles. Behold, serendipity and tentacles— or dare we call it…. tentacledipity.

— posted; 23.04.2019 // ↞ prev. || four || next ↠

“What, you’re not even going to try and stop me?”

At your question, the two males shared an exasperated look.

“Well, no,” Jongin answered plainly, pointing an accusatory finger your way as he narrowed his eyes halfheartedly. “What is the point? You are just going to get away, anyway.”

Your incredulous gaze was drawn to Jongdae next, as he continued where his partner left off. He seemed entirely too pleased with himself, lips curled in a smug, kittenish grin and his expression sly, marks coloured light yellow. “Besides, we are no longer required to watch you. We have been relieved of our duties. Which, personally, I am more than glad for. I think I have aged more than ten sweeps from the stress alone of trying to keep track of you. Really, are all humans so slippery?”

“No, probably not. Just me.” You shrugged in answer, before his earlier words caught your attention and you gaped. “Wait—what do you mean ‘relieved of your duties’? I’m free?”

Jongin shrugged, stretching indolently across the cushioned swing that you’d found him and Jongdae reclining on, out on a patio near your rooms, when you’d attempted to sneak out of the wing. Now that you thought about it, they did have a particularly carefree air right now, something you weren’t really expecting considering how wired you’ve seen them some days.  Jongdae swung one leg over the other, completely lax. The action left you in a state of shock, almost.

You continued to sputter for a moment, your brain unable to comprehend the sudden change in the status quo. Sure, this whole time you’d protested the fact that they thought you needed babysitting—ignoring the fact that it was thanks to an incident that came about thanks to you being a dumbass. But, if you weren’t under ‘watch’ anymore… who were you going to have fun evading and escaping? This was the highlight of your days sometimes, what were you going to do now that you couldn’t do it anymore? This felt like a big disruption to the routine you’d established here.

“Do not know, do not care,” Jongdae smiled at you. “We have not been told what will be happening.”

“Wh-what so I’m just, I’m just supposed to sneak around and pretend there are people trying to catch me?” you burst, feeling a little indignant. They should have consulted you first! This was unfair. “Who am I supposed to torment when I’m bored? Who am I supposed to trick with sweets and flee while they’re distracted?!”

Jongin lurched forward, eyes wide. “So you ADMIT that you did that to trick us!”

“No!” you wailed, mournfully. You turned away, dramatic as they likely expected you to be. “They were friend gifts… but I guess they mean nothing now. I’m… I’m leaving. I’m ending my friendship with you two. I’ll…I’ll find some other guard friends— better guard friends— who will chase me as long as I want them to!”

You stomped your foot, fighting a smile at the sound of their barely restrained snorts. You give them a half-hearted glare over your shoulder before turning and yelling, “Don’t look for me! You won’t find me!”

The second you started to walk away they could no longer hold their laughter and the sound of it makes you grin as you retreat down the hall, not bothering to try and sneak as you had earlier now that you knew no one was there to catch you. It was oddly liberating, to be honest, and you didn’t quite know what to do with the freedom. Maybe that’s because even when they were ‘watching’ you, you weren’t exactly restricted. Really, it was a wonder Jimin made them try for so long when it clearly had little to no effect.

Your arms swung a bit as you walked, a bounce in your step. You can’t even remember where you were going in the first place now. It wouldn’t surprise you at all if you didn’t even have a destination in mind when you left your room, actually. You’d been a bit lost in your thoughts lately.

There was a certain someone to blame for it.

As usual, the source of your dilemmas and deep-thinking was the ever-elusive Mister Jimin. Except, after the events of the other night in the hall, which were still painfully fresh in your memory, he had lost his right to the ‘elusive’ title. He hadn’t been bothering to try and avoid you any longer, something that kind of made you want to scream. It was what you wanted, yes, but not quite so soon and so intensely. You’d been in withdrawal for weeks and then he’d gone and given you such a big hit at once that you weren’t ready for it. You’d probably need another three weeks to come to terms with the male’s sudden flip that night and following one-eighty change in behaviour.

You were a little ashamed and excited to admit that he’d completely turned the tables and now you were the one frazzled and flustered. You couldn’t see his face in the halls—an alarmingly much more common occurrence after that night—without thinking of how it had felt when he pushed you to the wall, the way his body slotted so perfectly against yours. Every time your thoughts strayed to the memory the very same butterflies you felt that night returned with renewed vigour and you were flustered all over again.

Was this how he felt? All those times you tried so hard to fluster him? God, perhaps you were more annoying than you initially accepted.

You weren’t sure how you felt about the fact that the dynamic between you had shifted so suddenly and so sharply. Admittedly, that night if he had asked you to get on you hands and knees you wouldn’t have even blinked before doing so. The look in his eyes, the tone of his voice…. They brought out a side of you that didn’t see the light of day that often. Honestly, you’d spent a lot of nights reflecting on what happened and you’d since realised that there wasn’t much that you wouldn’t let that man do to you.

Even so, you weren’t a submissive person by nature, despite your inclination in the bedroom, and you really didn’t want him to think that was the case. You wanted to give back as good as you got, and every time you left your room you steeled yourself to doing so should you run across him.

Except it was a little easier said than done. Despite your affirmations, the second you caught sight of him the butterflies would return and you’d turn tail and run. It was shameful, and you were incredibly embarrassed at your own behaviour. Your mother didn’t raise a coward! It was just that, perhaps, you were a little more rattled and flustered than you allowed yourself to believe.

You realised you needed to be more firm with yourself, though. You needed to make yourself stay and interact with him or you’d never get over the ridiculous butterflies or the way your heart flipped and your pulse started to race. Again, today, you steeled yourself and resolved yourself to sit through the suffering if you happened to run into him again. At the slight tone of flustered panic that ran through you at the thought, you were quick to reassure yourself that it actually wasn’t that likely you’d run into him at all.

Well, historically you had been prone to being proven wrong when assuming such things and today wasn’t an exception.

In your wandering of the halls like a ghost with unresolved business in the material plane, looking for something to entertain yourself with, you happened to walk past a room that had a number of funky sounds coming from within. Intrigued and able to smell entertainment from probably a mile away, you were eager to investigate once you saw that the door was slightly ajar.

When you pushed it open, you quickly realised that you probably should have waited and listened to the sounds a bit more first. But, well, you were nothing if not an idiot and at this point, you were at peace with it.

“Stop! Stop, I am too old for this! Gods, Jiminie, where do you get all this energy from?!”

Confused as to exactly what you just walked into, you leant against the doorframe as you watched Seokjin bend over slightly with his hands on his knees to brace himself. He was wearing a different sort of clothing than you’ve seen before, the fit and material resembling more fitness-wear than anything. His breath came in short pants, apparently winded from whatever he and the other male had been doing before you walked in. Which, you realised quickly from the weapons along the wall and the cushioning along the ground, was… fighting?

Seokjin rattled something out in his native tongue and Jimin burst into laughter from where he stood, stretching a few feet away. He was dressed similarly to Seokjin and god if it wasn’t the most mouth-watering image you’d ever seen in your entire life. Deep blue material complimented his honey skin and raven hair perfectly, not that you thought there would be a colour that didn’t suit Jimin. His marks were a delighted summer yellow and the apples of his cheeks were flushed in slight exertion. Seokjin was in a similar state but unfortunately for him you were too whipped for Jimin to appreciate it as you should have.

Jimin said something you couldn’t understand to the elder male, who burst out loudly in response, “I have duties, you @#&@)#! Not all of us can do whatever we want, you know, I am the one stuck with the royal duties today! Find someone else to help you.”

Jimin was grinning, but seemed a bit disappointed at Seokjin’s answer to whatever he had said. A part of you wandered exactly what Seokjin had called him and you regretted that you didn’t know much kelkoe at all. Seokjin let out a pained noise as he stretched, closing his eyes, and all of a sudden you were overcome with the realisation that you were in the same room, in very close proximity, with Jimin.

Instantly, as you expected, the butterflies returned full-force to barrage the walls of your stomach. The sudden nerves made you feel bit nauseous and at once you felt the familiar urge to turn tail and flee.

No, you bit back the flight aspect of your fight or flight response. No, you said you wouldn’t run, and you wouldn’t. You needed to claim back a bit of control in the new dynamic you’d found yourself in with Jimin and damn it if you didn’t do it now then you never would. So, you did what you usually did whenever you had to do something not so desirable to you at the time and turned your brain off.

“Find someone to help him with what?”

The attention of the two males was instantly on you, Seokjin instantly appearing a cross between amused and sly. You didn’t like that one bit, and quickly raked your eyes over the other male. A mistake—he was surprised at first but the way his features melted into a curious look and his eyes darkened into molten pools almost made your knees week, like you were experiencing your first crush all over again. God, damn it. This was harder than you anticipated. You couldn’t help but wonder if he recalled the events of the other night upon seeing you, like you did every time you saw him.

“Sparring,” Seokjin supplied a little too merrily, and it was almost like you could see the cogs turning in his head. “Kelkie have a lot of restless energy, so it is common practice and customary to have a sparring partner.”

“You two are sparring partners?” you queried, trying desperately to appear much less nervous than you were. Your voice didn’t tremble, so that was something, and at least you weren’t blushing. Yet.

Seokjin’s lips curled into a sly simper. “No, Jimin’s sparring partner is the King, actually. But, since His Majesty is still on leave and Jimin has had an awful lot of… pent up energy, lately, I have taken to being his partner in the meantime.”

Jimin shot the older male a glare at his words, and you couldn’t deny the stupid ripple of giddy hope that dared to bubble within you for a moment. You thought he’d say something to protest his words, anticipating banter, but were caught off guard when his gaze simply returned to you and you felt like you were suddenly in the spotlight once more. Your heart stuttered—shit, damn it. Stupid attractive alien. Your brain was still turned off so that you could remain riding a wave of pretend bravery, and you scrambled to make the most of it and recover.

“So, you need someone to spar with?” You looked to Jimin, interest and excitement leaking into your tone—and it wasn’t fake, in the least, despite your nerves. You almost kicked yourself for what you said next, though, a little too brave for your current state of hidden fluster. “I used to spar with my shipmates when we had long trips, it was always a lot of fun. I’ll spar with you.”

Very bold words from you since you knew how much stronger and faster kelkie were than you—you’d witnessed it one time when you tried to fix a piece of hair that was pulling your scalp from one of Joy’s hairstyles and she’d positively vaulted across the room at breakneck speed to smack your hands away.

Seokjin positively grinned, but Jimin’s face fell into an expression of protest. His dark brows drew together, lips tugging down at the corners.

“No,” he refused immediately, “You will get yourself hurt. I cannot spar with you.”

You sputtered, indignant, and felt a bit of your usual confidence return to you as you pushed from the door and walked forward a little bit. “What? Mister Jimin… are you afraid a weak little human is going to best you in combat? I suppose I understand, the shame for you would be unbearable…”

You’d poked the bear expecting him to continue resisting and refuting you, but to your complete and utter surprise the male’s expression shifted once more, his mouth snapping shut and jaw tensing as his eyes bore into you with a new sort of intensity. That look spelt trouble for you and boy if it didn’t send the most giddy, excited shiver down your spine. Were you perhaps a masochist? This might be the time Jimin finally snapped and killed you for being annoying but you couldn’t think of anything but how hot he looked and how good it would feel even if his hand did end up around your thr—

“That is an excellent idea!” Seokjin was quick to express his avid support, but you got the feeling from the shit-eating grin that never left his flushed face that he had an ulterior motive besides backing you up like a good friend. “There you go Jimin, nip that stress in the bud. I am off now, I have many duties to attend to. Don’t play too rough, children.”

With that he bounced, leaving you and a silent Jimin in his wake. You were still reeling from the abruptness of his departure when there was movement from the corner of your eye and you whipped to see Jimin walking further into the room. You could feel a shift in the air, a new sort of tension that tingled along the base of your spine and made your breath catch. Keep it cool, keep it cool— you needed to tip the scales back into balance.

“Weapons?”

You’d begun to walk further into the room to join Jimin, but froze in your steps at the sound of his voice. It was deeper, rougher than you’d anticipated—he’s back was still to you and though you couldn’t see his face you saw the tension in his shoulders and along firm lines of his back. The shirt was slim-fitting and clung to his form everywhere except the sides where, from about halfway down, the material sported a slit. You guessed it was so he didn’t get too stuffy and so didn’t pay it any mind.

You steeled yourself, summoning some of the confidence that had returned to you so fleetingly earlier, and moved closer, stretching as you did so. “None is fine.”

His jaw ticked as he sent you a curious glance over his shoulder before giving a short nod and turning to face you better. This was the first time you’d been in his presence for longer than three seconds since that night and you felt an absolute mess with each second more that ticked over. Fuck, it was fine, everything was fine. You just had to hold it together a little longer then your nerves would wear off and you’d be back to normal. Probably.

As he settled into a loose pose, readying himself for another ‘sparring’ session, his eyes wept slowly over your form. You squared your shoulders and kept the playful smile on your lips, doing your absolute best to ignore the frantic pattering of your heart against your ribcage. You relished the way his eyes darkened as you stretched your back and your shirt rode up a sliver, providing him the barest peek of your skin. You could tell as you slipped into a loose pose of your own that from the tension he still held in his form, he wasn’t going to be using his full strength on you at all.

You had no doubt he was going to go as easy on you as he could.

But then, if he wasn’t using all his strength and speed, how would he be releasing the pent up tension that these sessions were meant to relieve? He wouldn’t be, so there must have been another reason he was about to humour you and ‘spar’ with you. Your mind ticked it over for a bare second before it registered.

He was playing chicken with you.

Something had changed in him since your last encounter, after you finally seemed to push him over a line of sorts. He was no longer resisting, no longer flustering and growing embarrassed—he was poking and prodding back just as you had done to him from the beginning.

You nearly balked at the realisation, but schooled your features just in time. He wanted to tease, to play? Well, lucky for him playing and teasing was what you did best. A wave of excitement washed over you. Your nerves all but disappeared as you resolved yourself, intending to use this opportunity and treat him as you normally would. You wondered, which one of you would bow first?

He must have noticed the changed tone of your smile, as one dark eyebrow rose in question. He tilted his head, eyes boring into you with more intensity than expected. His marks shifted colours from plum to rose, to periwinkle. A sequence that you had no idea how to decode yet still made your stomach flutter instinctively.

“Are you ready, petal?” he asked, and the nickname nearly undid all the hard work you put into reclaiming your usual mojo.

“Of course, peach cheeks,” you fired back, smiling brightly. He tried to hide it but you saw the way his lips twitched and his marks flushed deep rose. Even so, he didn’t blush, and the observation made you both giddy and eager to try and pull the reaction out of him.

“You may make the first move,” he offered, keen eyes catching every twitch of your features and shift of your body. You’d learnt from Seokjin and Namjoon that the Kelkie were a race of elite warriors, and you could tell just from looking at Jimin and the way he regarded you that he knew how to read and predict moves in battle. You knew then, that you couldn’t turn this into a game of strategy, or he would best you before you even had a chance to have fun. He was stronger and faster than you, obviously, but you didn’t want to make this too easy for him.

You nodded, taking a moment to choose how to proceed before you threw caution to the wind and moved on instinct alone. He watched, waited, coiled and ready for whatever move you might give him first.

When you dipped then lurched forward, aiming a light hit to his face, he dodged with ease. He had a bit of an unreadable expression on his face before you moved, but now that you made the first swing and he was sinking into the sparring mindset once more, an excited glint began to make itself known in his eyes.

You were right in assuming he would hold back. He weaved out of the way, incredibly graceful, and twisted mid-movement to bring his knee up, aiming for your middle. He was fast, but you knew he could be faster—with an amused huff you slipped out of the way and took a few light steps back before darting forward once more to try and jab his ribs. Like that, the two of you began to fall into a pattern.

Something about sparring always set your blood alight, and you could tell the same was the case for the alien dodging and weaving your light-hearted swings. The thought excited you, and you couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled from your throat as he swung and you spun out of the way just in time. You continued like that for the next few minutes, grinning uncontrollably at the sound of the huff he’d let out each time you dodged. So far, despite your occasional swings, you had been on the defensive. Even then, there was no heat or urgency behind his attacks. You wanted him to put a little more effort in.

His breath sped up the longer the two of you moved, his expression morphing. Slippery was how the guards had described you, and slippery was what you proved to be now. He was holding back almost all of his strength and speed, but he still should have been able to grasp you with ease. Yet each time he threw a hit or reached to grab you, you would dip and dodge, dancing out of the way. His stomach gave an excited flutter, the muscles of his back tingling. That was what this was—the way you were moving and interacting with him, reading his movements enough to flee but not to counter, with enough push and pull that it kept him on his toes…

It was like the two of you were dancing.

It was nothing like sparring with his own kind, yet he felt his heart stutter and kick into a higher gear in excitement nonetheless. You had a habit of making everything so exhilarating. The more you pulled back only to push lightly, prodding him and luring him to make a move for your gain, the more he felt himself slip into it. He was no longer moving with the intent to humour you or anything along those lines—he felt it, deep within his abdomen, the knot of longing forming once more. He wanted to chase, to catch you. And with each smooth dodge and light-footed prance out of reach you performed, he felt himself growing more and more riddled with the need to fulfil that instinctive desire.

It was as though you could feel the change in him, the longer the two of you tangled. You could sense a shift and, true to your nature, immediately went to exploit it.

“You’re so slow, peach cheeks!” you let out a breathless giggle as he lurched fluidly and tipped his body in a roundhouse kick of sorts. You ducked, darting forward and trying to land a hit on his gut as he righted himself. “Are you sure you beat Seokjin? You barely—”

The male didn’t even need to respond, as your smug tone was cut off the second his hand flew to grasp your fist before it could make contact with him. Your heart lurched into your throat, breath catching, as he adjusted his grip and tugged you forward, completely off balance. You crashed into his chest with your own, his other hand wrapping around your wrist like iron as he pulled them both behind your back with ease. You were arched into him with your heart racing, stomach flipping. He stared down at you with a dangerous curl to his lips.

“I thought I told you not to push so hard, petal,” his voice was so breathy and low it was absolutely sinful, a shudder rolling down your spine.  You could barely tear your eyes away from his own, heat flushing over your skin. Weak as you may be for him, you refused to give in so easily.

You felt his breath brush your face before you shoved your rapidly-returning nerves away and leant up, lips brushing his ear and the cool metal that dangled from it. Your playful tone had his grip tightening “But I like the end result.”

You felt him stiffen in shock, posture turning rigid; apparently he hadn’t been expecting that. You used this to your advantage, breaking out of his hold and snapping your hand around one of his wrists instead. You darted back then danced around him, pulling his arm with you until you were completely behind him. While he was still dazed your free hand whipped to grab his other one, pulling both behind his back and pressing against it in a mockery of the position he’d just had you in. The sound of his breath catching in his throat made your stomach dip giddily.

Deciding to push further while you had him in this position, knowing he’d snap out of it and turn the tables in the next second or so, you pressed a teasing kiss to the nape of his neck, breasts pushed to his upper back. The move was dangerous as it kept you within his reach for longer, but at the shudder you felt move through him you deemed it worth it.

Unfortunately for you, right after that reaction he jerked into action and broke his wrists out of your hold. Letting out a soft squeak of alarm that bled into a short giggle, you leapt backwards and danced out of the way as he spun and lunged for you. The dance began anew.

Except this time, Jimin had changed his tune yet again.

His marks were stained rosy-purple, shifting to wine each time he neared you. His moves became less hits and kicks, and more dives, lunges and grabs—and each time he got closer to catching you in his hold you couldn’t help the way your heart leapt in anticipation and excitement, pulse racing. The way he moved was so incredibly graceful and fluid, like a predator in its natural element, and numerous times you were so mesmerised it almost got you caught. Still, you managed to evade him, and the longer you did so the more worked up he got. Faster and faster, molten gaze never losing track of your form. You wouldn’t be able to catch him like this, you realised; you’d have to let him get close first.

You meant to lure him in purposefully, but in one of your bids to dance out of his reach you ended up stumbling over your own feet—immediately, he pounced. Your arms flew to the side in an attempt to reclaim your balance but you didn’t get the chance to follow through. Jimin dove forward, powerful thighs keeping him stable and propelling him to you faster than you could register. His hand closed around your wrist, using your arm and off-kilter state to turn you before releasing it and looping his arm firmly around your middle instead. The breath whooshed out of your lungs as you were yanked backwards, back meeting his chest as he contained you in his iron grasp. A shot of arousal spiked down your spine as his other hand whipped up to sit over your throat, grip loose but still present, thumb pressing into the soft flesh and fingers tilting your jaw up and head back.

You were sure he could feel your harried breaths, hell could probably even hear the way your heart was currently racing. Your skin was damp with the slightest layer of sweat you’d worked up from your constant movement and activity. You could feel his own breath panting against your neck, his lips and nose brushing against the sensitive shell of your ear as he dipped his head.

“What did we say about saying things like that so carelessly, petal,” his voice was a sultry combination of a lilting purr and a teasing coo, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your waist. Your hands flew to grip the forearm currently pressing against your stomach, before moving to his bicep. You attempted to shift stance and haul him over your shoulder, like you’d managed to do to old sparring partners so many times before—yet Jimin didn’t so much as budge. The thrill of being faced with such unwavering strength made your stomach dip and butterflies swarm.

You didn’t have the words to respond, instead letting out a soft gasp as he rubbed his thumb along the sensitive column of your neck. Your mind raced, thoughts stumbling over one another as you scrambled for how to proceed and what to do. He was about to win, in more ways that one, but alarmingly you couldn’t find it within yourself to care all that much. There it was again, the yearning to just give yourself over and let him have you. It was getting to be a bit like an old friend, at this rate.

Your sudden desires gave you an idea, however. You rolled your body suddenly, rocking your hips back against him and grinding your ass back oh so ‘innocently’. Unprepared and unsuspecting, the action wrought a sharp, lilting gasp from the male’s throat. You felt the way his grip weakened for the barest second and were quick to take advantage of it.

Spinning in his hold, as you pivoted on your heel you used the other to catch his ankle. The result was his knee buckling, leg knocked out from under him, and as you pushed him backwards the two of you fell to the floor in a heap. You landed atop him, as you’d intended, with your thighs either side of his slim waist and your crotch pressed over his. You were out of breath as you braced yourself on his chest, one palm flat against the top of his sternum with your fingertips brushing his throat in a mock ‘dagger’. His tongue darted to wet full lips.

“Playing dirty,” he commented in between panting breaths, eyes boring into you as his voice brushed your eardrums, thick and low—shamefully, it had your thighs tensing with the urge to close. At your almost imperceptible shift, his nostrils twitched and his pupils blew up, hands suddenly on your hips with a firm grip. He didn’t move after that, but you felt the way his entire body tensed.

“I’m not above it,” you smiled, struggling to catch your own breath. You pushed your hands from his chest, leaning back, and in the process of shifting your weight unintentionally ground your core against him. His fingers instantly dug into your hips, leaving a delicious ache in their wake, as a soft groan that almost sounded like a growl slipped from his throat.

“You—”

“Jimin-ssi, I am terribly sorry to interrupt, but Seokjin called for you—there is an issue that requires your input.”

You jumped, startled beyond belief by the sound of a voice at the doorway to the room, and scrambled off of Jimin instantly. When you turned to see just who you expected, you offered a glare. Joy smiled back, unapologetic and clearly amused at the situation she’d walked in on.

Jimin sat up, a hand coming to pat his lower back—you watched the motion, wondering exactly why he did it but unable to suss a reason out. He turned to face you, eyes dark and swirling with something you couldn’t name but that made your heart skip a beat in anticipation nonetheless, before he rose to his feet and walked coolly to the door. You weren’t ashamed to say that you stared at his ass as he went.

“Understood, let him know that I will be there soon. I have… something to take care of first.”

Your brows furrowed in confusion as you wondered exactly what he had to take care of, but he was slipping through the doors with a hand pressed to his back and gone before you could think to ask. You might have been confused as to what he meant, but Joy seemed to be in the loop and very amused by it.

“I see you’re making progress in wooing him,” she observed, tone playful, and you rolled your eyes as you hopped to your feet. Now that you were no longer distracted by Jimin, you could feel how sweaty and sticky you were from the whole ordeal. Ugh, exercise. A wave of embarrassment coursed through you at the sudden thought—did he notice your gross state when you were on top of him? How humiliating.

“Yeah… Maybe,” you said, dusting off your bottoms. “I’ll gossip with you later though, first thing’s first I need a shower. Do all of you really spar that often to get your energy out? In this heat?”

Joy’s eyes lit up at this titbit of information, the long raven plait down her back swinging as she tilted her head. “Oh, so that is what you were doing? Interesting take on the practice, I will admit.”

You wanted to send her another half-hearted glare but found her words too funny to be able to pull it off. A snort escaped you instead, “Hardly. He went far too easy on me for it to be considered a real spar.”

The female snorted, her marks colouring a delighted blue-green in her amusement. “I am not surprised. Jimin is faster and stronger than most kelkie so I do not imagine he would use anything close to full strength when sparring with you. Interesting that he agreed, though.”

You hummed, unsure how to process her words just yet. “Huh. Well. I’m gonna go back to my rooms and get changed, I’ll find you again later. I have some…. Questions.”

Joy raised an eyebrow but you merely offered her a grin as you left. “See you! And don’t forget to tell Seokjin whatever Jimin wanted you to.”

She rolled her eyes, muttering a curse under her breath before she gave a wave in farewell. “Goodbye. Take your time, please.”

You couldn’t help you laugh as you ventured further down the hall, “I won’t!”

x     x     x     x     x     x     x

True to your word, as soon as you were done bathing and changing you zipped off down the halls in search of her for your promised interrogation session. You were expecting it to take much longer than it did for you to actually track her down.

When you found her, it was on a balcony with Namjoon, who she appeared to be playing a board game of sorts with, and Yoongi, who was to the back napping on large cushion in the sun. He protested whenever you called him a cat and then went and acted just like one, you couldn’t help but laugh.

When she caught sight of you, Joy seemed surprised. “Oh, you really did have some questions you wanted answered, did you?”

Namjoon looked at you curiously after he moved a piece on the board, taking advantage of Joy’s momentary distraction. You wondered what he was thinking before his lips adopted a sudden sly quirk and his teasing tone greeted your ears, “Got up to some fun this morning, did we?”

You rolled your eyes, pulling out the third chair between them at the table and flopping into it with all the attitude you could muster. “I whooped Jimin’s ass in hand-to-hand combat, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Namjoon laughed and Joy snorted, the former clearly having been told what kind of scene Joy had walked in on earlier.

“By playing dirty?”

“My specialty.”

Another chuckle rumbled from his chest as he shook his head, turning back to the board. You allowed a brief moment of silence to settle over you as you watched the two of them make a move. When you couldn’t immediately figure out the point of the game, you gave up your observation.

“Anyway, about those questions I had,” you said suddenly, making the kelkie female to your right smile and shake her head. “I’ll ask them now, since you’re not busy.”

Another snort of amusement and she turned her head in your direction, dark eyes glimmering with mirth and marks glowing soft orange. “Of course, since I am not busy. Go ahead, I know it must be burning you up inside. Has it been unbearable?”

You nodded dramatically, ignoring Namjoon’s eyeroll. “Yes, incredibly so. I haven’t slept in days.”

You received another laugh for that and could barely keep your face straight as Joy shook her head, placing her elbow on the table and leaning her face into her palm. “Well, cheeky human, what is it you are curious about?”

You bit your lip, pondering what you wanted to ask first for a moment before deciding to cut to the chase. “Well, I want to know—why is it that every time I tease Jimin he runs away holding his back?”

It was an innocent enough question in your mind, but the reactions you received made you think that the answer was otherwise. Namjoon choked on his own spit, and Joy’s eyebrows shot up as she clamped her mouth shut and looked very much like she was trying not to laugh. A strangled sound from the side of the room told you that Yoongi had woken up and heard what you said.

Confused, you tilted your head. “What? What is it? Does he have back spasms or something? Wait, are your hearts in your lower back? Am I stressing him out so much he’s having heart attacks?”

To your complete and utter surprise, Namjoon’s face slowly began to turn bright red, and when you turned to peer at Yoongi you found his cheeks had coloured as well, the tips of his ears pink as he coughed and averted his gaze to the balcony. Joy was the only one who didn’t seem incredibly embarrassed at your question—on the contrary, she seemed to be having the time of her life.

“Oh, I love it when you humans ask things like this.” She was positively gleeful, grinning so wide that it actually concerned you a bit. “Your reactions are so funny.”

“What?” you pressed again, worried but also ten times more curious than before. “What is it? Come on, tell me.”

Joy, still grinning, sent Namjoon a pointed look and the male coughed, unable to meet your eyes as he cleared his throat and started, “Uh, well, y/n, you know that there are certain physiological differences between us and kelkies…”

You nodded, slightly impatient but clamping your mouth shut nonetheless in the hopes he would hurry up and continue.

“And you know, uh…” Namjoon looked like he wanted to melt into the floor, face bright pink. “Y-you know that uh, s-sometimes the differences are the ones we can’t see—”

“Spit it out, Joonie!” you couldn’t hold it in, wriggling forward on the seat and placing your palms onto the table. “Please, I’m dying to know, you can’t keep me in suspense like this—”

“y/n, you’ve seen porn, right? From Earth.”

You turned to face Yoongi at the sound of his voice, nodding as you did so. “Yeah, I have. Why? You need some? I had a USB of it with me on the ship, I can go look for it if you want—"

Namjoon choked, coughing and smacking his chest. You ignored him for the moment as Yoongi’s cheeks seemed to darken before he swallowed and continued. “So. Have you seen uh… you’ve seen Japanese animated porn?”

You stared at him plainly for a second, wondering if he was serious. “Uh… yes? Of course I have, I was a teenager too—”

Namjoon let his head slam onto the table with a loud groan, Joy letting out a delighted peal of laughter. Yoongi steeled himself and pushed on. “S-so you know, in the… in Japanese animated porn…”

“Say it for what it is, Yoongi,” you said. “Hentai.”

For a second the urge to kill you flickered in his gaze but he seemed to wrangle it quicker than usual. He let out a great, anguished sigh. “Why do I even bother—have you seen tentacle porn or not?”

“Of course I have, what does that have to do with—” you stopped short, his words ticking over in your head for a few seconds before your jaw dropped and you spun to face Namjoon and Joy with wide eyes and warmed cheeks. “No—oh my god, really?! Holy—”

Namjoon made a strangled, mortified noise and Joy burst into laughter once more as you stumbled over your words, a mess of thoughts zipping around in your poor monkey brain. As utterly shocked as you were in this moment, in a sense you also weren’t that surprised and, shamefully, the knowledge sent something akin to a shiver of excitement down your spine. Wow, you were really a bit depraved, huh? Then again, if you paid attention to the raunchy shit you watched in your teen years (and, if you were being honest with yourself, probably would still watch now if you had it) it would have been a bit telling.

“Oh my god,” you slammed your hands onto the table, on the absolute edge of your seat. “You guys have tentacles? For real? Where? How many? Do both males and females have them, or only—”

“Slow down, y/n,” Joy snorted, withdrawing from the table for a moment to recline comfortably in her chair. She crossed one leg over the other, seeming incredibly tickled. “One question at a time, or I will revoke your question-asking rights.”

You let out a horrified gasp, before instantly snapping your mouth shut and letting her answer the questions you fired at her so rapidly.

“To answer your first question, yes, kelkie do have extra appendages utilised in intercourse. We call them #%&$*@ but you humans describe them as tentacles and that seems to be easier for you to say, so we go with that.” At the sound of a foreign kelkoe word your mind blanked for a moment, but the rest of her words quickly sank in. Namjoon and Yoongi were still dying of embarrassment in the background, and you were a little embarrassed yourself but was by far overpowered by your burning curiosity.

“They’re used specifically for sex?!” you couldn’t help yourself, unable to contain your questions. Obviously, when one hears tentacles they think of certain scenarios, but you didn’t want to just assume. Learning that that was what they were literally for though… god, if it wasn’t enough to make you sweat like a sinner in church.

You could have sworn you heard Yoongi mutter, “I should have known she’d be horny for tentacles, who am I kidding,” under his breath in the background, but ignored it in favour of watching Joy’s features as she compiled a response for you.

“Yes, they are reproductive organs,” she said, a sly smile curling her shapely lips as she easily pinpointed the direction your thoughts were going. “Additional ones to those that some have found we have in common.”

You blushed, but still said what you thought as soon as it entered your mind. “Oh—I—two sets?”

Joy nodded, still very much amused. “Yes—and that is to confirm what you asked earlier, as well. Both males and females have them, but females have less.”

You let that sink in for a moment, mulling over the sudden overload of information, before your mind caught on to a certain detail that it had glossed over earlier and you balked. “Wait—you said you ‘some found’? Who…?”

At your words, both males in the room seemed to shrink in their seats, eyes everywhere but meeting your own. Joy snickered and they flushed bright red. A cackled built in your chest as realisation began to sink in.

“We have had a few celebrations and festivals in the time since the Queen’s crew arrived—you humans like to enjoy yourselves, don’t you?” She might have been teasing you as well as the other two males in the room, but you weren’t ashamed enough of your libido for it to have any effect. At this point, you’d been openly horny for Jimin for a while.

“Oh my god,” you whispered under your breath, eyes flicking between the two sheepish-looking males. The insinuation of what the extra appendages meant for their extracurricular romping in the sheets… you blushed.

Eager to return to your earlier line of questioning, lest you lose the opportunity altogether and they changed the subject, you forced yourself to turn back to a grinning Joy.

“So uh, where are they?” you inquired, somewhat gingerly. It would seem you had some tact left, after all. Joy snorted at your manner and tapped her fingers on the table, marks a cool, light blue.

“They are in two lines along the lower portion of the spine,” she informed you, tilting her head and watching your expression keenly. She smiled the second she saw you make the connection between what she said and what you saw. At your questioning look, she continued, “Yes, that has to do with why Jimin, ah… holds his lower back when you tease him. For the most part, they are hidden. They aren’t appendages that we have entire control over, and in many senses it is as though they have a mind of their own, following our base instincts and urges. When a kelkie experiences a certain amount of stimulation or arousal, they are prone to appearing.”

She gave you a moment for the information to sink in before you made the connection she was waiting for. “Oh, oh—wait so—so every time he slaps a hand to his back and runs away its just because I made him pop a tentacle boner?”

The female raised a brow at your choice of words but seemed to understand the slang enough to snort and nod her head. You heard Namjoon and Yoongi choke on a laugh, Namjoon slamming his head onto the table once more and disrupting the board game that had long since been forgotten.

“Yes,” Joy confirmed simply, lips twitching. “I do not think I ever saw him give such a reaction before you came along, though. I have to give you credit.”

It probably wasn’t something you should be preening with pride to hear, but you were anyway. “Ah, finally. My efforts are being rewarded.”

Yoongi shook his head, squinting at you. “How are you so… unapologetically thirsty?”

“We’re talking about Jimin, how can I not be?” you answered simply, before straightening in your seat and whipping a finger to point in his direction. “And let’s not be the pot calling the kettle black, mister! Word on the street is you’re just as horny as me!”

Yoongi balked, face paling before it began to cycle through about seven different shades of red, and Namjoon let out a strangled chortle.

“Don’t you have more questions for Joy?” Yoongi tried weakly to deflect the attention and change the subject, but to no avail.

“Well, yes, but I also have questions for you—and don’t think you’re off the hook either, Namjoon, I see you looking mortified over there.”

The two males let out long, arduous groans, and Joy erupted in delighted peals of laughter. What was going to be an informative afternoon for you was clearly going to be a very long one for them. You wriggled in your seat, getting comfortable, and dove in headfirst.

You were going to get as much information on this new discovery as you could.

↞ prev. || four || next ↠

::[ please lmk what you think! & pls consider buying me a kofi if you’d like to support me in some way! <3 ]::

[zetalial]

A look at the old FMA Fangame Bluebird’s illusion

Hey there. One of the more interesting things to come out of the FMA fandom is this fanmade visual novel called Bluebird’s illusion. It was made in October 2004. I’ve recently tried it out so why don’t I share?

It’s based on the FMA manga but was clearly heavily influenced by the anime as well with it’s cute artstyle and much of the music. The manga was of course far from finished at this point and perhaps what drew plenty of attention to this little fanproject was its speculations. (And the impressive art.)

So, the story takes place in a seemingly happy future where Ed has restored his brother’s body and now lives with Al in a lovely house in Central. He still works for the military and has just started a new job as the Fuhrer’s secretary. Mustang is also around, of course.

However all is not well... (Long post by the way).

(I’m going to be spoiling this games plot pretty liberally just for the warning.)

It is called Bluebird’s illusion because the brother’s seeming happiness is just an illusion that cannot last. It is revealed that in order to restore Al’s body, Edward made some sort of deal with the Homunculi. However, his current body isn’t good enough to hold his soul and it’s starting to disappear. Plus the homunculi are still watching in the background.

The game at first is pretty lighthearted with lots of jokes about Ed’s height, about Roy’s avoidance of paperwork, Breda’s fear of dogs etc. and the beginning is honestly pretty boring to play, in my opinion. Yet, it gets darker and in fact this game has no happy endings. 

There are three main endings to this game plus one joke ending. 

The most infamous ending is definitely the Pride!Ed ending. 

Ed gets taken into the basement beneath Central HQ where the Homunculi’s Father awaits to use Ed to fulfill his vision of creating a new, perfect world. This happens in every ending actually. 

The Homunculi’s Father is Hohenheim, by the way. (As I said, it’s following the manga but at the time it was created it was not yet clear that Father and Hohenheim were different people.) He speaks to Ed with a strange amount of fondness, calling him his most beloved son. (Which is quite something when its in front of the other Homunculi. I found this a really interesting dynamic) 

Ed of course tries to resist, even with Hohenheim-Father promising to create a new permanent body for Al. He is held captive in the basement for five days before someone comes to rescue him. In that time he gets pretty abused by Envy but manages to disrupt the Homunculi’s plans some.

In this ending, Roy and Al come to save Ed but things go rather badly. 

Both Roy and Al are defeated and dying (from facing Bradley(AKA Wrath) and Envy) so Ed, in his desperation and heedless of his own wounds, attempts a transmutation to bring them both back. All his efforts bring the basement crushing down and almost no one survives.

Seeing how Ed is not fully dead and the great power he possesses, Hohenheim-Father decides to bring him to life as the Homunculus Pride (A name he has never given to anyone before as he felt he had never had any children worthy to bear the title until now.) 

Ed’s pretty much dead inside however. Pride is a cold, heartless creature who can’t seem to remember who he was. His new life seems to feature following Envy around (the only other Homunculus left.) 

For all the love around Pride!Ed, the game only has this one screenshot, featuring an admittedly really cool design. (I love how he’s got two arms again but only one has a long sleeve). If you search for fanart there’s loads of Pride!Ed with this design. (It’s also rather impressive how this game predicted a Homunculus could be made out of a human as this was before Greedling existed and the method seems pretty similar.)   

So, that was the real downer ending, (Roy dead, Al dead and Ed having lost himself). The other two endings hit closer to bittersweet.

If you go down the Al path in the game, by going home early each day and spending time with Al, you can unlock the Veg!Ed ending.

So, you do things like agreeing to help Al with housework and agree to go out with him on your day off and you deal with the serial killer plotline. (Yeah, that’s a thing, it’s a little weird.)

Anyway, this time when Al and Roy come to rescue Ed from the basement, Al is particularly self-sacrificing. Actually this end kind of reminds me of the end of the anime. I’m sure you can see why.

Envy stabs Al through the chest and so a distraught Ed decides to sacrifice himself to save his brother. He trades his soul for a new body for Al.

Al lives this time, (As does Mustang) and his body is restored permanently. However Ed has given up his soul. He isn’t quite dead - he’s physically alive but unresponsive. Al takes him back to Risembool and continues to talk to and take care of Ed in his vegetative state, hoping his brother will some day respond to him.

But there’s no sign of any recovery.

...

Right, the next ending is known as the Roy end. This is the ending you get if you follow Roy’s storyline.

His storyline also deals with him remembering Hughes, who’s been dead for quite a while. You’ll notice in the picture above that one of the books has one of Hughes’ knives inside. 

In this storyline you are invited to go out with Roy on your day off rather than going alone or with Al. It includes getting in a fight with him at one point.

(They go into a pub and initially Roy orders two alcoholic drinks. Then he corrects himself and orders Ed something non-alcoholic. His first order had been for Hughes.)

Sadly, this ending is bittersweet as well. Al and Roy go into the basement to save Ed but this time Ed can’t save his brother. Alphonse disappears permanently. Ed’s still messed with the homunculi’s plans as he does every time and Roy and Ed manage to get out alive though Ed’s crying.

Ed is extremely broken by the loss of his brother. For the next two weeks Ed locks himself away in his house alone, willing himself to believe his brother isn’t truly gone. Then Roy, who is now the Fuhrer, comes to see Ed. He’s cold as ever, telling Ed that his brother’s gone and that he needs to move on and start living, that Al would want him to be happy.

Ed does start to move on, and continues his life by working under Roy in the military. (For RoyEd shippers this could lead into an angsty relationship between the two in this ending. It’d be a pretty good dynamic.)

So, how about the last ending - the joke ending? It’s called the Tea alchemist ending. In this game, one of Ed’s jobs has been to serve tea every day to the Fuhrer. Yeah.

To get the tea ending you have to go down the King Bradley route. Basically you need to serve tea to him first every day and work overtime every day. On your day off, Bradley should call you and asks you to come into work on your day off. If you agree then Ed gets a permanent position of serving the Fuhrer as the Tea Alchemist and he never gets taken down to the basement. 

(The person patting Ed’s head in the above image is Fuhrer Bradley by the way.) Working overtime every day has Ed get closer to the Fuhrer. 

Ed gets given some cookies made by the Fuhrer’s wife. Another time, Ed falls asleep and looks absolutely adorable on the couch. Another day, Selim calls Ed and they have a friendly chat. Selim says he wishes he could see his father more often. Then the next day, Selim has gone missing and Ed is able to tell them where to find him. King Bradley is very grateful, hence the fatherly pat on the head. Honestly, this might have been the most surprising storyline for me in the game. I didn’t expect anything like it at all (whereas I knew about the dark endings).

So that’s all the endings in this game. The only other thing to mention would be all the fanservice stuff. If you ship Royed, EdAl or Edvy, this game gives you fodder for all these ships. (Or if you don’t ship them then you can just ignore it pretty easily). 

Of all the character designs in the game, Envy’s is probably my favourite to be honest. 

I love how his spiky hair seems to be all wildly different lengths and, well, just everything about his design. He’s as cruel and smug as ever of course. (When I say there’s shipping fodder, there’s no tender moments just typical Envy tormenting Ed and whatever his companionship with Pride is supposed to be.)

Roy is probably the one with the most obvious shipbait. At one point he convinces Ed to wear a dress to disguise himself as a girl. If that sounds random and fanservicey, it certainly is.

(Yes Roy looks that smug for pretty much the entire game.) He and Ed are practically constantly arguing. 

Ed meanwhile, looks incredibly cute throughout the game.

(His pajamas are adorable. It’s has little cartoon Alphonse heads on it)

All versions of human Alphonse tend to look pretty good, I find. And this game does not disappoint in this regarding. For an obvious bit of fanservice, this game gives a particularly random shot of Al in the shower. (Getting that particular event was also kind of annoying and random.)

Yeah, there’s no explanations for some things. 

Oh, this isn’t necessarily fanservice or anything but I thought that Breda’s design looked surprisingly good, of all people. 

It’s the casual open uniform look. Makes him feel big and strong.

Finally there’s also a few outtakes that become available if you complete the right parts in the game. Most of them weren’t much to talk about but I found the one between Wrath!Bradley and Father Hohenheim to be rather funny. 

It’s a silly outtake so it starts with Hohenheim commenting that Wrath is a good and dutiful son to him. Then he notes that Bradley is a father too and asks how Selim is. Wrath replies that Selim is the cutest boy in the world. Hohenheim has to argue though and says that, no, his son Edward is the cutest in the world. This goes on for a bit. Then Mustang (who has been secretly hiding with Alphonse) appears in order to interject that he believes Edward is indeed cuter than Selim. This is a mistake. 

Wrath kills Mustang in anger. And the conclusion is that you should never mess with a father’s pride. 

Gosh, that line has some layers in it. Anime!Bradley actually is Pride ironically enough. And later in the manga it would be revealed that his son Selim is Pride. That hasn’t been revealed yet though and the only Pride in Bluebird’s illusion is in fact Pride!Ed. 

Now, I’m sure Selim is absolutely adorable in this verse but can he really compete with Bluebird’s illusion Edward? 

Heh, so this has become an incredibly long and detailed post that hopefully explains everything there is to know about that old fangame. It was an interesting thing to try out for sure. I’m not sure I’d actually recommend trying it out as it’s a bit slow and I’ve already explained pretty much all the interesting things about it. 

If anyone has any further questions, I’d be happy to try and answer if I can though.

I personally love the headcanon that Hohenheim is in fact Father and I think I would have preferred it if the manga had actually gone that route. If only for the creepy fatherliness he might exhibit towards Edward. The odd love twisted with being evil and wanting to destroy the world would have been amazing in my opinion. Just the sample this game gave me was great.

[queenharumiura]

Space explorers Vasco and Kajika~

Send me a ship and I will grade it: ||Still accepting||((//sweats sorry for being late with this one @heromanvasco @wild-untamed-heart))

-

C: Not a bad ship

Alright, so I will preface thiswith, it’s been a while since I got into Lookism. After webtoons took it overand they changed the names (probably for legal reasons), I just--- could not doit. It did anger me for one thing, but it’s also just--- we know me… with names…memorizing them.

I would have to go back fromthe beginning and reintroduce myself to all of the characters and memorize theirnew names. I’m pretty sure they changed all the names, even the minorcharacters, so it’s just like—oh no. The nickname ‘Vasco’ remained the same ifI recall, however.

Anyways, the reason why I’mprefacing with this is—I’m working with dated information here. I’m sure sincethe last time I read there has been a lot of character development. I’m goingoff what I currently know of him. I’ll get back to Lookism… eventually;;;;

ALRIGHT, ONWARDS!

I honestly think that they wouldn’t be too bad together?Certainly, they are good friends and we’ve already established this in thread form.Vasco is pretty fair towards other people—once he gets into the correctmindset. Admittedly, he does have a bit of a negative bias towards attractivepeople. He got… bullied a lot in his younger years.

‘Bullied’ is putting it lightly, considering he has scars fromit. Not only emotional ones, but actual physical scars. That’s why he’s sotatted up, to hide the scars that were given to him. Even scars… is putting it lightlyin my opinion, since it’s not as simple as scars. It’s like… graffiti, but onthe body. The tattoos hide them, so he can be less ashamed of it.

From this, he formed a phobia of needles. The tattooing wasto help him get over it. I’m sure there’s still a bit of nervousness thatremains from needles as it highly relates to the bullying. This is something thathad such a deep impact on his life. He has a negative bias towards attractivepeople (the one who bullied him), he absolutely DETESTS bullies, and he vowedto become stronger as to not get bullied again.

He has a lot of pride in himself for how far he’s come. He’salways loved Superheroes from a very young age. It isn’t like he came to likethem after the bullying thing. Nah. He’s always loved them and he’s alwayslooked up to them. To him, heroes are such a big part of his life. Inparticular, ‘Heroman,’ whose real name is Vasco.

Taking this identity onto himself, he’s mostly called ‘Vasco’rather than ‘Euntae’ which is his real name. I’m sure the Webtoon gave him adifferent true name, but I don’t know it.

He may have a bit of a poker face, but he’s actually areally big SOFT BEAN. He’s truly a GOOD BOI tm. I absolutely adore him and Icry for him. I feel like once I re-read the series, I’ll skip the entirety ofhis past arc bc I cannot watch as my baby gets BULLIED.

Anyways, Vasco does have a prejudice against good lookingpeople, but he’s not blindly prejudiced. If he sees that they aren’t like oneof those good-looking people, he’s quite willing to befriend them. Thisis the case with the main character Hyunsuk (I think it’s Daniel in webtoon?).He thought that Hyunsuk was bullying students, and Vasco challenged him. Turnsout, he’s not a bully, and he was trying to help people.

From what I know (unless things have changed), they becamereally good friends. I think it’s somewhat of a conditioned response for him tobe initially distrustful of good-looking people due to what he went through. However,his attitude towards justice and his general ‘good boy’ nature prevents himfrom blindly hating people based on their looks. If they are good people, hewill like them.

He loves to drink strawberry milk and he’s just—so---precious. He will give milk boxes to people that he likes/approves of. Hyunsukbeing one of such people. It’s like a part of him being shy and what not.

Going back to that—HE IS VERY SHY BOI. He’s very awkward andhe’s not very confident, though he may appear that way at first. He’s confidentin his strength, that’s for sure. He’s full of confidence in himself, but onceit comes down to--- his… uh… intelligence… or social-awareness… he’s um…lacking… a bit to put it gently;;;; I will say that he’s aware of it himself. I’mnot just saying it. When asked: if you could have a wish granted, what would itbe? Paraphrasing, his answer was: “I want people to stop calling me stupid.”Which basically is a ‘I want to be smart’.

Basically, he can be a big idiot sometimes and it’s—a lil endearingto be honest. He’s also just not sure of what to do around other people. Whathe may think is fun or cool, others may not feel the same way. He’s easilyamused and very emotional. Being given a rock can have him almost shed tears. (hewas told that it was a lucky rock passed down through generations.)

He’s very dense and very gullible, essentially. He also isn’tvery aware of his own strength, so he could totally launch someone out thedoor, across the room by playing pillow fight. That’s why he’s not allowed toplay along. 8( His best friend usually tells him to join in though, much toeveryone’s horror. Not to go too far into the backstory relating to the bestfriend… this guy really serves as Vasco’s emotional support and ‘is thissocially okay? Can I do the thing? Can I join the pillow fight? If I do this,would it be cool? Is it lame if I do this?’- support.

He often asks his friend for a lot of advice on many thingsas he doesn’t know what is ‘right’ or ‘cool’. His friend is so lenient on himthough and lets him get away with a lot of stuff. Like, it makes you happy? Gofor it! I’ll support you bud! I’ll have fun with you! You want to dress up inthose blow up costumes that make you look like you’re riding on a dinosaur? Youwant our entire department to dress up as that for the school competition---?Uh… okay, I’ll get them to agree.

Get you a friend like him.

Anyways, this illustrates the fact that Vasco is very--- insecure.ESPECIALLY around girls. Most girls run in fear around him. A common thing isfor him to shed a tear once anyone runs away from him. He may look scary but heis GOOD BOI. So, he’s so tender hearted and it breaks my heart to see peoplerun from him, or assume he’s bad.

Kajika, being more open minded and accepting, would be agood influence on him. He can befriend her and learn that not all girls willrun in fear of him. OTL She has a cool and outgoing personality, so I’m sure he’dlook to her as a ‘cool person’. Don’t be surprised if he randomly comes to asklike ‘hey, is this app cool? Are a lot of people playing it?’

That being said, he’s really not too big on social media andwhat not. He just wants to have fun and have a taste of what other people aredoing to have fun. He’s not exactly a person who chases after trends orwhatever. It’s a very common thing in Korean culture to chase after trends andwhat not, but he’s not quite like that.

So, I think that Kajika would be a great influence on him.Have him learn how to be more secure in himself, and to have more confidence inhis likes. Teach him to not be so tense around girls. He doesn’t walk like arobot in front of Kajika, so that’s an improvement.

The Vday and Wday events that goes on helps reinforce the ideathat they are friends and that she’s not afraid of him. I’m honestly not reallysure what impact Vasco could have on Kajika, really. He’s relatively calm in general,but when he’s around friends, he just turns into an excitable puppy. I feellike, there isn’t really much she could gain from him, which contrasts him.

He can learn how to be more confident; he can learn how tofeel more secure about himself, and he can learn how to be more comfortablearound girls.

It’s not like you NEED to be able to gain something in yourSO, but I do think it helps in most cases. I guess if anything, they are comfortablewith each other. I personally feel their dynamic works best as friends, but Idon’t think them as a couple would be a bad idea by any means.

Vasco is a VERY LOYAL person, and I’m sure that Kajika isthe same. Both are very dedicated to their friends, and I’m pretty sure theyboth have a strong sense of justice? They share a lot of common traits, and Ithink that’s something that’s crucial for a relationship they’d share.

They don’t contrast to the point that they would touch uponeach other’s landmines, I think. I guess it would be one of those ships whereit’s bestfriends àlovers.

Did anything change at all? No. I thought something wassupposed to change? What are you going to change then? No idea. Tell me whenyou think of something.

That’s pretty much them, I think.

Though, Vasco does get a lil hung up on how things shouldbe, so I can see him trying to study up on how to be a boyfriend. Reading up onhow to be romantic or whatever. I’m sure if they did start dating, there wouldbe an odd transition period for him bc he’s trying to figure out what to do andwhat works best. Lol

If Kajika prefers him being the same ol’ Vasco, she just needsto say so, and he’d do it.

They’d be the type that wouldn’t change much in arelationship, I think. Kajika, from what I vaguely recall, is a free spirit. Idon’t think she’s very tied down to many material aspects like riches, societyranks, etc. She really loves the beauty of nature and exploring.

I honestly don’t remember that she was really very swayed bymany romantic situations. Based off the vibe I get, I think she’d be moreimpressed by sentimental things, or nature than she would anything showy. That reallywould play well into Vasco, since he doesn’t really do well with ‘showy’things. He’s more of a sentimental bean than anything, so I think he’d havethat covered.

They’d have a comfortable relationship for the most part, Ithink. Of course, I don’t know what current Vasco is like so who knows if I’mreally right anymore, lol. Still, this is based off what I last remember ofwhere I left off. So that’s my verdict based off what I remember.

I also gave the rating I did since I don’t think it’s fairfor me to give anything too high or low when I’m not caught up with the ‘Lookism’series. Kek.

Hope you enjoyed!

[okietokiee]

Fic: Hjönk, Hjönk

Pairing: Skwisgaar Skwigelf/Toki Wartooth

Rating: M

I was really inspired by @picklespunchedme @bittebecca @sonderrbeee ‘s various fan art of clown!Skwisgaar 😳 thanks so much for letting me write a fic based on your gorgeous art!! 💕 

Summary: 

Skwisgaar makes some especially harsh remarks which cause Toki to start avoiding him, and the lack of contact is really starting to make the Swede’s sex drive go absolutely haywire. 

Fortunately, Skwisgaar comes up with a genius (albeit horrifyingly embarrassing) plan to make it up to his hot-tempered boyfriend lover. 

And Toki positively loves it. Perhaps a little too much. 

——————

Skwisgaar knew he had fucked up. 

After countless years of brutally harsh, biting criticisms and demeaning insults, Toki had finally had it. Normally he was able to take Skwisgaar’s comments, admittedly not always in a stride, but with minimal bloodshed (most of the time). And he wasn’t even completely sure what was different about today, about the disparaging remarks he’d grown used to throwing out daily. 

Maybe it was the stress of having to record a whole knew album from scratch? The stress of the rising tensions becoming so goddamn obvious lately? He knows he’s not the smartest person around, but you’d have to be blind to not see the cracks forming in their band’s already fragile dynamics. He knows it’s not just affecting Nathan and Pickles.

But whatever the underlying causes were, all it took was an offhand, “That’s was fuckins dildos, dos it agains idiots,” during a slow-moving rehearsal to get Toki raging like a spoiled five-year-old kid told that no, he could not have candy for dinner. 

After screeching and using his flying-V to destroy a fair amount of their studio and sound equipment, Toki had tired himself out and retired to his bedroom. 

He’d also taken to avoiding him for the past week. And maybe the Skwisgaar from a few years ago wouldn’t have (outwardly) cared so much, but ever since they’d shared an earth-shattering, momentous night together just months before, they’d both been inhabiting the same bed for a majority of nights. 

And, though Skwisgaar would rather die a painful death by firing squad than admit it to anyone, Toki had been the only person he’d been sleeping with ever since that night. He loathed to label it as anything serious, but that didn’t change the fact that he was painfully reluctant to break this surprising streak of faithfulness, his longest one yet. 

However, regardless of how much he didn’t want to sleep with anyone that wasn’t a dopey Norwegian guitar player with a penchant for tantrums and hissy fits, that didn’t change the fact that his sex drive was going fucking haywire. 

Storming into the Mordhaus living room, he irritably asked, “Has anyones seens our dildos rhythm guitarist?”

“Eh, I think he went out drinkin’ with thet clown again,” a stoned out Pickles mumbled from the couch. 

“Whats!? I thoughts we puts a restrainings orders on dat creep!”

Nathan sighed from a nearby desk, putting down his book. “Yeah, we did. But you know that kid. He just loves those fucking clowns.”

That unfortunate string of words made an idea pop up in Skwisgaar’s head. 

“…coulds you repeats dat?”

“I said he loves those goddamn clowns.”

“Nos, de odder words!”

Nathan glared, confused. “Those fucking clowns?” 

Skwisgaar grinned manically. “Ja! Dat weirdos loves fucking clowns!”

Pickles could be heard potentially dying of laughter a few feet away. 

Nathan narrowed his eyes, a disgusted grimace on his mouth. “I know you suck at English Skwisgaar, but ugh. That’s some brutal imagery.” 

Skwisgaar, ever the trooper, did not let the revolting thoughts affect him, as his plan was coming to fruition in his mind. Yes, Toki was annoyingly fond of childish gimmicks, clowns included. Toki could never even stay mad at Dr. Rockso, an old drugged-up, strung-out rock-and-roll clown, no matter what shit that creepy asshole put him through.

Yes, he knew what he had to do. He didn’t like it one bit, and it could potentially ruin his reputation completely if word ever got out that he even considered this.

But… 

Skwisgaar bit his lip, his thoughts suddenly full of brown whiskers and childish giggles. 

It would be worth it.

——————

Hours later, Skwisgaar was regretting every single choice he’d ever made in life that had led up to this point. He felt like a fool and looked like one too.

His only solace was that the random klokateer he’d ordered to find him this costume was no longer capable of ever blabbing his secret to anyone, at least in any way that involved a functional mouth. Or hands. 

And now he found himself pacing around Toki’s small room, waiting for the little dildo to get back home. The sound of his baggy blue and yellow pants swishing and the stomping of his large red shoes did nothing to alleviate his growing anxiety. 

Skwisgaar scratched at his neck, careful not to smudge any of the meticulously applied clown make-up he’d taken an hour to perfect. He was vaguely grateful that his experience with corpse paint made this endeavor slightly easier, but also horrified at exactly how naturally circus make-up came to him. 

As he was pondering his deteriorating mental state, he heard the door creak open and a surprised, ear-shattering, absolutely delighted squeal. 

Toki crashed face-first into his chest, holding tighter than a newborn koala to its mother. 

“Oh Odin! Yous a real cool clowns Skwisgaar!” Toki gleefully said, nuzzling the red ruffles around his neck. 

Skwisgaar was glad his red cheeks were camouflaged by the blindingly white paint. 

“Eugh… Ja, I guess I ams,” the Swede nonchalantly agreed, not meeting his lover’s eyes. 

Toki paused from his snuggling, and gazed adoringly up at Skwisgaar’s embarrassed face. 

“Skwisgaar… Dids you do dis because you know Tokis been mads at yous?”

Skwisgaar coughed awkwardly and avoided his gaze. “Maybes if a dumb dildos hadn’t beens avoidins me for sos long, it woulds not haves come to dis…”

Toki smirked. “Yous just proving Toki needs to do dat more often.” 

“Fucks you-!”

“Okej,” Toki cut him off with a contented sigh, cuddling into Skwisgaar’s colorful, silky costume even more.

This was the closest they’d been in a week, and Skwisgaar’s body was responding rather excitedly to their close proximity. 

Toki giggled, feeling the growing hardness coming from Skwisgaar’s loose trousers, and he pulled the Swede over to the bed and pushed him down, crawling right on top of him and going in for a deep, fervent kiss. With the right angle, Toki was able to avoid dislodging the bright red clown nose on his lover’s face. 

With a few well-practiced maneuvers Skwisgaar was able to bring Toki down to only his underwear, but when he made movements to remove his own ridiculous clothes he was stopped by a firm hold. 

“Nos, keeps it on.” Toki’s flushed, erotic expression was very convincing. 

“Ja, fines…” Skwisgaar groaned, canting his hips up, desperate for any kind of friction. 

Toki smiled, reaching for the lube that has been ever-present at his bedside table for the past few months. He took a moment to take in Skwisgaar’s smudged clown make-up and gorgeous, smoldering expression. The juxtaposition was disorienting. 

“Skwisgaar…?” 

“Ja Tokis?” 

“Do yous maybe… I knows we havent’s dones it likes dis yet, but,” Toki mumbled, his face red and expression coquettish, “I think I wants to tries to take it.”

Skwisgaar was at a loss for words, his mind (and body) already overheating. So far Toki had been the only one topping, citing his lack of experience with men and dislike of being dominated as his main reasons for wanting to avoid switching positions. And Skwisgaar hardly cared, always being very satisfied by Toki’s eager enthusiasm.

But the thought of finally being able to become so wholly one with Toki had Skwisgaar’s head spinning and heart racing. 

“Of course älskling, as long as yous ready,” Skwisgaar said, rubbing circles on Toki’s naked hips. 

Toki’s eager nodding was answer enough and then he wiggled out of his underwear. 

Skwisgaar leaned forward to get a hold of the lube, but Toki pushed him back down. 

“Yous just watch for nows,” Toki murmured with a sweet smile, opening the lube to prepare himself. 

Skwisgaar couldn’t handle watching a mewling, trembling Toki Wartooth preparing himself for long without feeling like he was going to literally explode into a cloud of confetti. The Swede pushed his own baggy pants down, not fully taking it off but exposing his painfully erect manhood. He moaned, giving himself a few strokes as he continued watching his lover teasing him. 

Finally, after what felt like eternity, Toki stopped and got another generous dollop of lube for Skwisgaar Jr. before lining himself up on the Swede’s lap. 

Skwisgaar watched enraptured as Toki slowly lowered himself down with a seductive whine and several sensuous movements of his hips. 

“Ah, fuckins hell Toki,” Skwisgaar cried, thrusting up desperately. 

Toki reciprocated in kind with more moans and wet, raunchy kisses, ruining a good portion of Skwisgaar’s make-up. 

As it was getting especially intense, their movements both in sync and frantic, Toki leaned down and did something incredibly peculiar and, honestly, kind of hot, at least to Skwisgaar’s current fucked-out-of-his-mind state. 

“Hjönk, hjönk,” Toki murmured with a smile as he squeezed the large, squeaky clown nose on Skwisgaar’s face with something akin to reverence. All without once pausing his fast, unmerciful pace. 

Skwisgaar was too goddamn horny and in love to question this, and he just responded by increasing his thrusts as well as his volume. 

“Ah, for the loves of Odins, Toki I’ms gonna-” he punctuated with a shout, feeling Toki tighten around him. 

After a long moment of blissful euphoria for both of them, Toki collapsed on top of him, breathing heavily and sneaking a few affectionate kisses along his neck. 

“So ams guessings you not mads anymore?” Skwisgaar snickered, running his fingers through Toki’s now tangled, sexily-ruffled hair. 

Toki giggled and playfully gave Skwisgaar’s big red nose, which surprisingly hadn’t fallen off at all during their vigorous lovemaking, a few more squeezes, filling the small room with obnoxiously loud honking noises. 

“Nah, buts if you does something like dis every time I gets mad at yous then I gonnas make sure to be angry evens more oftens.” Toki chuckled, snuggling up to Skwisgaar’s now cum and sweat stained clown costume. 

Skwisgaar sighed, equal parts hopelessly exasperated and desperately fond. 

“Wells enjoys it while yous cans you dildo, dis ams not likelys to ever, ever happens again,” Skwisgaar said firmly. 

Toki grinned mischievously and lifted himself up.

“I thinks Toki cans change yous mind abouts dat,” he declared proudly, slipping out of bed to walk over to his nearby work desk. He leaned over it enticingly, ass up, giving Skwisgaar the most pornographic come-hither look the Swede had ever seen. 

“Comes over heres and let’s me convince yous,” Toki murmured suggestively, giving his cute butt a little shake. 

And that night was the first of many that the halls of Mordhaus were filled with the echos of passionate Scandinavian honking and lovemaking. 

——————

I don’t think Hjönk actually translates to anything but god I love that word LOL 

Also, sorry for any weird mistakes I didn’t catch! I’ll edit it and maybe add some extra stuff soon and then post it on ao3 :D

[salmonthestoryteller]

Friendships - Roswell New Mexico

I've been meaning to write this for awhile. Friendships are an important part of the Roswell universe, regardless of the version. I will admit that, in some ways, RNM disappointed me on the friendship front in Season One. Partly because everyone was kept so separated during the season. 1x11 has the biggest gathering of characters in one place. But, in the Crashdown group gathering we're still missing Kyle, Cam, and Alex - despite them being in on the alien secret. (We're missing Maria too - but she's not in on aliens.). And while a lot of characters gather again at the UFO Emporium Gala, there is still only a few scenes with more than two characters interacting directly. The lack of group dynamics during the season, and that in the finale they still weren’t brought together but separated once again, is a disappointment of mine that I hope we get to finally see change in s2.

I feel the lack of large group dynamics was in part because most of the friendships we are given in RNM start out fractured rather than the type of Ride or Die friendships the other two Roswell versions have.  In both Roswell High and OG Roswell, we start with both the Pod Squad and Human Squad as groups of three who would pretty much do anything for each other.  However, while RNM sets it up that these characters were like that ten years ago, we are introduced to them with these friendships mostly broken.

The Pod Squad - This is the story we get the most of through season one. The breaks in the trio’s friendship spawn from a few points (Their separation when they were seven, and the Drifter when they were fourteen), but the main one that really broke them was the murders ten years ago.  When it comes to who's going to bury a body with you type of friendship, The Pod Squad quite literally does this twice so there’s the answer.  However, the murders also destroy the relationship the trio once had. As we learn as the season progresses there’s other reasons, because on top of mysterious murders the trio compound two sets of lies.  Michael and Max hide from Isobel that she blacked out and murdered the three girls (to their knowledge at the time), followed by Isobel and Michael using Isobel’s powers to send Liz away from Max when he seems likely to tell her the truth and hiding that from him.

When everything is over all their relationships suffer.  Max and Michael’s suffer the most - with the close friendship we witness in the flashbacks completely destroyed.  Max and Michael are not even really talking to each other at the start of the season and their interactions are mainly antagonistic.  While we see that slowly change as the story progresses, culmination in their talk in 01x11 - their friendship is still not completely healed by the end of s1.

While Isobel and Max are still close, several comments between them hint that their relationship has suffered as well. Max’s “Will you stay out of my life for once?” to Isobel is one. Obviously Isobel has ended up mother henning Max after what happened, and it has not always been welcome. I also feel several comments he makes about her marriage and Noah (before the reveal) hint at a jealousy or bitterness over the fact that hiding the truth from her has led to her being able to get married and settle down while he was left alone. (But maybe that’s just my interpretation.)  After the full truth is known, their relationship is badly damaged.  However, once Isobel places herself under watch, and especially after her nearly dying, they come back together - in many ways better than before.  I feel they are more open with each other in the end of the series.  More willing to honestly support, rely on, and protect each other rather than the sort of bitter or overwhelming version of these things we are first shown.

Isobel and Michael’s relationship seems to have actually suffered the least.  Perhaps because they both felt they were protecting one another. (Isobel thinks Michael killed the girls on accident, Michael thinks something went crazy with Isobel’s powers and she murdered the three girls when not herself.)  Isobel has no problem running to Michael when Max shuts her out about Liz, Noah mentions Michael’s names among the reason Isobel disappears on him which shows that Michael does rely on her as well; Isobel is the one to first verbally protest when Michael suggests turning himself into Liz; when Max shuts them both out after finding out the truth Isobel holes up in Michael’s trailer; etc.  The end of the series is full of more of this relationship, with Michael being the first person Isobel goes to when she thinks the flashbacks are telling her she was in love with Rosa, and Isobel being the first person Michael speaks openly about his relationship with Alex to. (He speaks about Alex to Max, but both times reluctantly and after being prodded, multiple times in the case of 01x11. With Isobel, Michael brings it up of his own free will.)

To be honest, I think Isobel and Michael are the best friendship we are given in RNM, and I adore them. However, I hope that after Max’s resurrection we will get to see more of the three always being there for each other - and not just Michael and Isobel.

The Human Squad - I’m going to start with Liz, Maria, and Alex.  I do have a very different opinion on their relationship than most people.  Because while I feel that, much like the Pod Squad, we are given this friendship that ten years ago was this deep, known each other all our lives, I will dump my boyfriend on prom night if he is a jerk to you, type of friendship, I also feel - like the Pod Squad - we are presented with a completely broken version of that in present time.

I see a lot of people referencing this notion about how they grew up together and how much that means, but… that isn’t my experience in the world.  Especially among those who left small towns behind.  Their best friend is the person they met in college.  Or the person they met once they entered their chosen field.  Many of them never even speak to their childhood friends again, or have a very distant relationship with them.  (I feel like I am ruining someone’s childhood right now saying this.)  It’s a different story if you don’t leave where you grew up, especially in small towns, and people who still live in the same place; work in the same place - those childhood friendships can mature with them and stay strong friendships.  But, honestly, for the most part, the people I have met over the years who left their towns behind end up leaving childhood friendships behind as well.

I think that is very much the take we are given in RNM.  We know Liz basically cuts all contact with Maria.  They say so in their first interaction. And while it is not said distinctly, Alex and Liz’s first interaction hints at the same.  Alex and Maria are more complicated, given that Alex does know what is happening with Mimi. Maria also comments that the Wild Pony is not Alex’s usual place to hang out in their early interactions. Clearly there’s been some contact.  However, I don’t feel it was a lot.  Even Alex’s comment to Mimi of “I’ve come out to you, like seven times” really still isn’t a lot.  Given that one would have been the actual first time he told her when they were teens, that’s referencing six interactions.  In ten years.  Mimi calls Liz “Rosa” multiple times in a single day’s interactions.  There’s also the fact that given Alex’s life there was no way for him to be spending a lot of time with Maria and Mimi.  He went to training, he’s been on three tours, and after he lost his leg he probably spent months elsewhere with recovery and rehab before returning to Roswell.  It just isn’t believable for him to have actually been in Roswell for any length. Whatever future Maria was planning she gave up for her mother.  So, just like they haven’t been in Roswell while she deals with her mother's illness and giving up her future, she was completely incapable of being the type of friend who would hop a bus or plane and go to them if they needed her.  Their lives pulled them apart, and along the way that friendship would have suffered by default.  And it did.

The thing with these three is that we see no hint anybody ever filled that void in their lives that was left by that friendship. They never trusted another person to that length again. Not romantically, not friendship wise. Nobody. So when circumstances bring them together again - they sort of regroup and automatically begin to act like friends again.  However, if you really think about it - it’s a very superficial healing.  On a deeper level, the three do not reconnect.

This is obvious because of the secrets kept between them.  In both previous versions of RNM, Maria is the first person Liz goes to with Max being an alien.  Admittedly, both times Maria is there for the shooting, but it’s more than that.  Liz goes to Maria because she trusts her deeply.  In OG Roswell there’s a period of time before Alex is brought in, but in RH Maria runs to Alex with the secret almost immediately after Liz tells her.  Once again, the trust level is there.  The trust isn’t there with the Human Squad in RNM.

Liz never tells Maria about Max.  Alex, even after Mimi discusses things with him that are a reference to Project Shepherd and the Alien Spaceship, doesn’t go to Maria. Nor does he go to Liz, despite discovering tech that looks partially organic and she is - oh, yah - a biochemical engineer. Maria doesn’t tell Liz what is happening with her mother until Alex forces her hand.  None of that speaks of deep trust.

While what’s happening with Mimi brings them closer, it still doesn’t heal them.  Maria still ends up crying alone over it at the end of the day - Liz fails to return and she doesn’t even ask Alex to stay with her. (She ends up crying on Michael but that was chance and not choice.)  Maria and Liz grow closer, and she does ask her to go to the faith healer with her.  But Maria is drugged and controlled by Noah, and Liz sees the flower in her necklace, the one that was used by Noah, and she still doesn’t even contemplate for one second telling Maria the truth. By the end of the season, Liz and Maria have grown the closest of the three, and I love their interactions.  But this is not a fully repaired friendship, or one where the three trust and rely on each other.  Definitely nothing like their past incarnations in RH and the OG series.

By comparison, Kyle sort of slides in and takes over where the friendship between the three fails - at least where Liz and Alex are concerned.  Kyle and Alex’s friendship fractured in high school, while Liz and Kyle are exes who hook up when she returns to town.  And, yes, you could say that Kyle was already involved with everything alien already so that set them both up to rely on him - but you can also question: why did they?  Alex, as he tells Kyle, is well past worrying about Kyle’s “locker room taunts”, but that doesn’t mean he should place anymore faith in him - knowledge about aliens or not - then he does Liz and Maria.  He purposefully does not look into his suspicions of the cabin wall until after Kyle leaves, yet when Cam approaches him he calls Kyle rather than Liz to find out about Dr Holden - even though she works at the same hospital.

Liz is kind of the same.  Yes, she’s always had more faith in Kyle than anyone else did in the past, and he’s the one who saw the handprint and is a doctor. But he’s been out of her life just as long as Maria and Alex.  Yet when she is questioning Rosa’s death, she doesn’t go to Maria  - who was definitely a good friend of her sister’s and would want to help her discover the truth if she was murdered - or Alex, who’s in the damn military and a hacker - she goes back to Kyle.

I love Kyle, but he pretty much takes Maria’s place. By the end of season one, the human friendships are centered more around Kyle than the original trio. And, frankly, while I love the result, it's because of plot. He takes over as the most trusted person for both Liz and Alex because the writers wanted to tell the story of what happened to Jim Valenti. However, as a result, when you actually focus on character interaction and not plot - it lends itself to the telling that Liz, Maria, and Alex are no longer that close or trust in one another.

Kyle and Alex’s friendship, I’d say is probably the second best of the series next to isobel and Michael’s.  They overcome their past - they’re there for each other as secrets about their families, and especially their fathers, come to light.  They rely on one another, and each take turns talking the other down when they begin to question if their father’s were right.  That is a friendship built on trust.

Kyle and Liz have a deep relationship by the end of the season.  They rely on each other as well, and they care deeply for each other.  Whether this is leading them towards just a friendship, or - with Max’s absence - a relationship we’ll have to see in s2.

Human-Alien Interactions - While we are given lots of positive interactions that could lead to friendships - Kyle and Isobel when she's sick, Max and Maria in Texas and again at her bar, Liz supporting Isobel when the truth about Noah comes out - the only friendship that actually forms in season one between the aliens and humans is Liz and Michael.

Liz and Michael's friendship isn't limited to just 01x09, either. While we see them working together, her making him dance with her, and her reluctantly admitting she likes him to Max in 01x09, it's 01x10 that Michael - equally reluctant - admits to Isobel he does like Liz (which is one of the only humans we ever hear him say that about), and their interactions in 01x11 continue the trend. Liz teases him about how he spends his time, Michael flat out tells her he and Max aren't doing well when she saves them, he teases them about Max about her flirting, and the look they exchange when he promises to protect Maria is gold. These are two people, both who have trust issues, who are building a friendship and putting their faith in one another.

Personally, I think Liz and Michael are the third best friendship RNM gives us - even above Liz and Maria due to the secrets Liz keeps from her. It's definitely among the top friendships of s1.

Hopefully with s2, we'll get a chance for these friendships to grow and this group to finally begin trusting one another, especially in regards to alien-human interactions pls, and more group scenes.  Where are my group scenes?

[class-wom]

Legion Chapter 25 “Morning After”-Thoughts – SPOILERS!!!

NOTE:  Due to the fact that I didn’t see the entire ep, this one will be a little bit different from my usual “morning after”-musings/ramblings/whatever.  It’s more of a thought-gathering and speculation based in part on the Chapter 26 preview as well as the few scenes -- namely the final scenes -- that I did ultimately watch, to say nothing of the notion of “Okay, how do I balance this with everything I’ve seen thus far?”                       

   *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *

 SPOILER TERRITORY

  *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *    *

1)  Okay, whatever my mixed feelings about Oliver Bird in full-blown leisure suit/martini mode may be after Chapter 13 and his role in Amy’s fate in particular and his reunion with Melanie at the expense of David and Farouk’s “revival,” I will concede that this was a cool moment:

2) Please tell me with regard to this parable parallel in terms of the “present day” situation that the Wolf represents Farouk and Cynthia represents David!  Granted, the “Not everyone wants to be saved”-moral of this tale does put the potential fate of our antihero* in a grim light (hey, at this point, my expectations are such that I’m almost resolved to that idea anyway, tbh!), but given the part played by Farouk in Chapter 24 and where the last two eps are taking us with regard to the original showdown between Farouk and Xavier, I really would hate to see Syd and the Loudermilks siding with Farouk yet again, especially since it appears to be setting us up for a “David & Charles vs. SK”-type of scenario!  I’m hoping “us and them, not us or them” is more with regard to David/Legion and less to Farouk at this point; they’ve already put ((ahem)) enough eggs in Farouk’s basket, and look where we are now!

3)  Okay, Syd and the Loudermilks (with an emphasis on the latter, I might add!) may be a little easier to root for now; I’ve said all along that the Loudermilks are the most sympathetic of the “old gang” left, with everyone else either reduced to robotic form or of questionable motives and/or allegiance and obsession just as bad as David’s if not worse!  And yet even they seemed to test me in Chapter 23 in particular:  Yeah, okay, even if I do understand his low trust issues at the time of Chapter 21 with Cary all too well and why he felt it necessary, I wasn’t okay with David brainwashing Cary, and naturally Cary came out of it none too pleased -- I get all that.  But just taking Switch and running off with her, calling it a “rescue,” and assuring her that she’ll “never have to hide again” only to throw her in a box in hopes of hiding her from David?!?  Yeah, I can’t possibly imagine why Switch so easily turned on Farouk and came back under David’s wing, tooth-losing and time demon-battling included, and it’s entirely possible that she’ll be associating Cary with Farouk from now on, which should put that dynamic in an interesting light in future eps!  🙄 (My new theory on that:  Perhaps one of the Legion-alters managed to get the box open and wake her while Farouk was busy taunting David? just a thought...)

4)  So all Syd needed to become “a true hero” was a completely new upbringing with a loving, functional adopted family, namely the Birds? could someone tell me (this is a rhetorical question, people!) why that was true for her and not for David? or was that the point, that he had that all along but Farouk’s toehold and/or his own genetic code was strong enough that he had somehow sensed the entire time that something was wrong and his seemingly happy childhood was a lie?  (Farouk as a fake dog certainly didn’t make things easier for him as a kid, you have to admit!)  Or is that the whole “Some don’t want to be saved”-philosophy, aka the entire point?

5)  Okay, Mel, let’s see if I have this straight:  What now gives Syd “the power to save the world” is “love, empathy, and understanding.”  Can we please back up to your rather (SK-influenced, granted) contradictory advice to her in Chapter 18, when you were literally putting a gun in her hand, encouraging her to “be a hero” and telling her that the best way to survive was to rely on herself?  And here’s an idea:  If you had given her the former advice in Chapter 18 instead of freaking her out, telling her “He doesn’t really love you!” and adding words to the effect of “He’ll turn into Legion the World-Killer,” do you suppose she could have avoided all of those antagonistic moves that, surprise-surprise, brought “Legion the World-Killer” (to say nothing of David’s subsequent violation of her!) out in full force by Chapter 24?!?  Prevention is less costly than cure in the long run, Mrs. Bird -- and the whole “Yeah, but NH ordered an entire season of eight eps!”-argument is all well and good, but still...

6)  It would be really nice when these folks come out from under the influence of Farouk that they acknowledge it with some sort of regret.  I mean, if the whole point is to “own mistakes” and all that, but maybe in their own way, they are, idk... 🤷

7)  “Not everyone wants to be saved.”  Substitute the word “help” for “save” and somehow that goes double, triple, and quadruple when you’re using the phrase “We want to help you!” when you trap the person in a force field, surround him with guns, and bring out his old enemy to really rub his nose into it, as what happened in Chapter 19! 🙄  That still kinda bugs me; I’m hoping that Syd’s ill-fated encounter with Legion in Chapter 24 will help her to realize that mistake and her part, intentionally or otherwise, in strengthening Legion’s resolve and increasing their literal “us vs. the world”-mentality.  It’d be nice if she admits that may not have been the wisest move on her part (part of the self-forgiveness eluded to in interviews, perhaps?), but at this point, I’m not holding my breath!

8)  Okay, embellishment on a point touched on briefly in #2:  Now that the already-fragile trust issues between David and Syd have been further marred by Farouk’s “brilliant” advice to Syd to lie and seduce David into compliance, and now that Legion is wary of Syd’s “trickery” and protecting David from it at all costs, I’d say Syd and the Loudermilks have their work cut out for them where dealing with Legion is concerned.  Syd’s choice of words at the end of the ep, “I know how to fix it” rather than “I know how to stop him,” are admittedly encouraging; I’m hoping they’re officially done with blatantly trying to kill David and instead will try to focus his efforts more in genuinely fixing the past and his family situations, since the point of this ep seemed to be that the key is a loving family support unit.  (Worth noting, Switch’s own distant relationship with her father, and I’m not sure if anyone else picked up on this, but her mother has never been acknowledged in any way, shape or form! read into that what you will!)

9)  We do remember that Melanie’s initial interest in David and his powers was to weaponize them (at the time) against D3, right? yeah, just thought I’d throw that out there, now that she’s in “Use the Force of empathy and understanding to save the world, Syd!”-mode.  Let us not forget that when the Summerland Gang first picked Syd up from Clockworks in Chapters 1 and 2, they were under the impression that it was David and not Syd who was truly being rescued!  They were initially interested in the one with literally explosive potential, not a mere body-swapper!  And if you want to file this one under “Character and Plot Growth and Development,” okay, fine.  But just because it’s filed doesn’t mean it should be completely swept under the rug imo!

10)  The Chapter 26 preview seems to indicate that Syd and the Loudermilks will visit the Xavier home and potentially bump into Gabrielle and even Baby Davy.  Now that has some promise! 😁

In “conclusion,” can you imagine how long this would be had I watched the ep in its entirety? 🤣 bwahaha!

*Yes, I’m using that word instead of “villain” concerning David; deal with it!!! 😝

[bts-love-sweat-tears]

Change of Heart (Follower Celebration Fic #3)

Title: Change of Heart

Pairing:  Jungkook x reader

Type: shifter!au, wolf!au, angst with a happy ending, Friday Night Lights meets Teen Wolf? Idk.

Word Count: 1,894

Rating: PG    

Warnings: mentions of depression post-bad breakup, language

A/N:   The third of five for my 200 follower celebration! Requested by a lovely anon. This literally wrote itself- I think you can tell sometimes when it flows easier. It was in the notebook that I carry around so I had a fun time deciphering my own handwriting lol. I was tempted to leave it open-ended and ambiguous as I am oft to do, but anon requested happy so I hope you love it. Except for the soulmate thing, it actually has very little to do with shifters.

A/N Update: Crap there are so many typos I’m sorry. Brain and fingers while typing don’t communicate well. Working on edits now, but was excited to get it out <3 

How could you even express what Jungkook meant to you? Until now, you had always kind of taken him for granted. Being with him was like breathing. You didn’t think about it until it lost its usual ease. Clearly, you were now in the emotional equivalent of a head cold. Kook was literally the boy next door, and the two of you had been inseparable since the day his parents had dragged him along to welcome the new neighbors; apple pie still steaming in their hands.

If your parents were surprised by the small-town niceties, you couldn’t say. Kook and you had been in the midst of a stare-down, some kind of weird kindergarten dominance battle. Later in life, you would realize just how dumb it was to stare down a wolf-shifter, but at the time you hadn’t even realized what he was, let alone the finer points of inter-species etiquette. And it didn’t much matter, since had caved first, and bounded over to wrap you in a hug. Most of your childhood memories from that time were filled with warmth, whether from the hugs or the pie you couldn’t say for certain.

You thought that warmth would continue forever, and for a long time, it did. Your childhood adventures with Kook were filled with pillow forts, catching fireflies, and watching Ironman approximately ten thousand times. But then puberty hit you both like a train, and in very different ways. His shifts started, and he shot up and bulked up, while you filled out in different places, both of you mutually pimply and suddenly awkward.

Childhood warmth morphed into a flame. Pleasant in small amounts but dangerous if left unchecked. So you tried your hardest to keep a lid on your growing feelings. Jungkook had long ago explained that shifters get one mate for life, usually another shifter, so that the person wouldn’t be destroyed by the other not reciprocating their feelings. He had explained that while “mate” implied something physical, it was actually so much more than that-two halves of the same soul residing in different bodies. Not someone to fuck with, literally or metaphorically.  The way he had talked about it at the time made it seem like something far off, like college, marriage, or having kids, so the two of you worked hard in tiptoeing around what that might mean for your friendship. Instead, the two of you continued as you always had, and if his parents shot the two of you knowing looks, neither of you acknowledged it.

As high school dragged on, the two of you became busier, him with varsity football and you with drama club. Your friend groups diverged, but you both still made the time to hang out on the weekend and nerd out together, your friendship never losing that special spark.

Until he started dating a fellow wolf shifter from a nearby school. You presumed it to be serious, since shifters didn’t really date casually due to the soul bond. You were never really the jealous type, and Jungkook’s new and improved bunny smile helped you to welcome his girlfriend into your friendship.  She “got” him in ways that you never could, and not just because she was a wolf. Toned, tall, and golden, you were fairly certain that she could run both literal and metaphorical laps around you. It didn’t hurt that she was cool and genuinely gorgeous. Why even worry about competing when it was clearly impossible? And toxic?

But you would be lying if you denied the smaller, less secure part of yourself that felt jealous and displaced. Jungkook still tried to make time for your more occasional Friday night hangouts, but she kept taking up more and more of his headspace. When not actively talking about her, he was checking his phone incessantly. Maybe you were being petty, but you still wanted him to be present in your life as well.

Slowly but surely, you started staying later at theater rehearsals and investing more time into other friendships. Correspondingly, Jungkook’s text messages slowed to a trickle. The two of you still ate lunch together most days, but it had become less intense than it had once been. Occasionally, he still gave you those signature one-armed hugs that you secretly loved, his chin resting on the crown of your much lower head. Years ago, he had given you an overly vague description of pack dynamics, and the need for physical affection, which confused you now. Shouldn’t he be getting said attentions from his soulmate?A small part of you was flattered that his new relationship hadn’t completely displaced you from his pack. “Bros before….” whatever, as the expression went.

You convinced yourself it was innocent, particularly since you had started dating an equally nerdy lighting tech you had met through drama club. If his affinity for the MCU replicated someone else’s, you couldn’t say. If his penchant for video games reminded you of a childhood friend, well, everyone loved video games. Nothing to see there. If when kissing him, you envisioned someone else’s face, well you would never let on. It was never as serious as Kook’s relationship seemed to be.

Though all parties involved knew the inevitable outcome of the blossoming relationship between the two shifters, you had never actually heard Jungkook use the word “soulmate” in reference to his girlfriend. Because of books and movies, people tended to think of it as insta-love, but that wasn’t (usually) how it worked in real life. For as as much as their inner wolves guided them, they were people as well: emotions, ambitions, tics and traits as much as anyone else.  Even in the “wild” (though you often snorted at the dramatic image this conjured), there were trial periods, rituals,  and rites of passage. But from the outside, the two of them were the complementary faces of a coin, peas in a pod, tied by the strings of fate, and any other metaphor that someone wanted to use. Maybe it was one of those things Jungkook just knew,without the need to put a label on it.

Or so you thought. Clearly, you didn’t know as much about the natural world (or matters of the heart) as you had thought. Most of your knowledge you’d gleaned from NatGeo or Discovery Channel documentaries- you were a suburban kid like any other. Your knowledge of romance came from novels with Fabio or one of his five thousand lookalikes on the cover, CW shows, and your admittedly very lackluster current relationship.  When Kook had found out  he had growled slightly, and immediately tried to mask it with a cough. But you’d known him long enough to not fall for his bullshit. You were indignant though-you’d been supportive of his relationship, so why couldn’t he support yours? Sometimes, when the two of you walked down the hallway holding hands, Kook would shoot daggers with his eyes, which you would studiously ignore. But the guy was either oblivious or braver than you gave him credit for.

All these pointed looks and tension should have painted a sign for you (in neon letters) that all was NOT well in paradise, but you were working so hard to suppress what you felt for your childhood friend that it surprised you as much as anyone else when Kook’s girlfriend broke up with him. “Broke up” was giving her more than she deserved-she had simply taken off one day. Wolf shifters tended to the transient side (Kook’s family being the exception), and one day when another pack was passing through, she decided to run off with the alpha. You didn’t know if she’d found “the one” or was just flighty. And you certainly weren’t interested in the politics of the shifter world, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out the bump in status she would get from a high school kid to an established alpha. But you couldn’t spare her a second thought- your best friend was destroyed. Suddenly, the golden jock of the school was acting like one of the emo kids: dark circles from lack of sleep, appetite wrecked, small things irritating him, or at other times, complete indifference when he should have been irritated.

You didn’t know if Kook had it in him to love anyone else- maybe that part of him had left with her.  And it wasn’t particularly at the forefront of your mind, but you were genuinely worried about your friend. With the fall play winding down and winter finals fast approaching, you had extra time on your hands that you were supposed to be using to study. Instead, you spent every waking moment with Kook…and some decidedly not wakeful moments. It was around this time that your own boyfriend broke up with you, citing your emotional unavailability. You felt bad for wasting his time, but you also felt free. It was a relief, honestly, to be over and done with it.

All of the distance between you evaporated in a few weeks, if that. You watched Deadpool and Ant Man, played Overwatch, and tried to distract your friend from his heartbreak. Often, he would fall asleep, head resting on your lap, tears dripping from the corner of his eyes, even in sleep. But his parents had told you later that was the only time he was seemingly at ease enough to sleep at all.

You knew there were things unsaid, but it wasn’t the time-not when he was emotionally vulnerable. You didn’t want to feel predatory, and it was during this time, things started to fall into place for you. Your own feelings began to crystallize, and you realized that it didn’t matter in what way you had him, but that he needed to be in your life. Even if romantic love never materialized, there were other kinds of love that were just as deep and important. And you realized that you loved him, in that way too. Everything else-it was a distraction. It was thoughts like this that strengthened your resolve when things seemed particularly bleak.

Over time, everything you gave to him, he gave back tenfold. He slowly began to smile again, and sleep through the night. But the two of you continued to come and go from school together, one doing homework and waiting for the other if at practice or rehearsal. He never dated again while in high school, and you both ended up going to the local university. You for the in-state tuition breaks and well-rated course of study that you wanted, and him….well, you weren’t sure why, but if the ways his parents smirked was any indication, you might have had an inkling. After a mandatory first year spent in the dorms, the two of you got an apartment near the campus. And though neither of you were ones for lengthy confessions you had an understanding: you were soulmates in whatever way a damaged wolf shifter and human could be.  Never alone and always taking care of each other. Which was why, you were so shocked when, one average day like any other, he got down on one knee, and offered you a small velvet box, telling you that his heart was in your hands,  as it had always been and would always be.

[hamaon]

I? Loved the latest episode(s)?

- Pink pointedly not having a voice actor was such a neat detail

- the fact that Rose is Pink Diamond by itself carries no weight for me whatsoever ("what does this add to the story? just one more dynasty"), but the fact that the entitled brat we've been seeing is Rose is everything

- Rose has always been a character I've had to pretend to enjoy more than I actually do. I don't know, something about her has been off, not real enough. She acted too big for her supposed position, for no reason whatsoever. Her backstory didn't justify her to me, but I didn't assume there might be a reason for that, just a case of a character not hitting home (the Pink Diamond theories were everywhere, of course, but they had no context early on, and we didn't know enough about Rose's personality - by the time that happened, the PD theory seemed impossible). But that she had all the privilege of her position, that she had the luxury of never having to consider anyone else's feelings, that she always got everything she wanted just by throwing a tantrum (and that she had to force herself to grow up, to make herself tone it down, because no one else was going to), Rose Quartz finally makes sense

- Pearl's guilt is more real because she is actually, to an extent, directly responsible for the deaths of thousands

- (not that people can't feel guilty for things outside their control, but it's always a little, I don't know. You're rebelling against a bad system, but think of the sacrifices, oh no!)

- sure, she might not have been able to persuade Rose once she set her mind on something, maybe Rose would have gone through with anyway, or found someone else, eventually, maybe whatever plan B they would have come up with would have been even more short-sighted, but she was still an accessory, she was at least nominally consulted on the decision

- Pearl's trauma, on the other hand, is more horrifying, because she was literally shut out of the means of getting to process it. There was no way to begin to heal even if she wanted to, she had to make do with resolving the layers, always skirting around the core

- thinking of Garnet speaking with absolute certainty about things past, and Pearl knowing that she will never be able to add to that conversation

- personally, I... can't worry about what this means for Pearl's agency, and whether or not she was really a "rebel". Not too much. Of course it passed my mind, but I discarded it as the scene went on, the entire thing is too comfortable. Body language and facial expressions are something this show excels at. Pearl's at ease. She looks so fresh! They're discussing things! Of course physical abuse isn't the only way unhealthy power dynamics can manifest, but the contrast between Yellow's Pearl flinching at her temper and her mere physical presence, and Pearl just kind of going "uh?" at Pink stopping her from drawing the sword, is massive. Their positions complicate things and will have influenced her, but she speaks against Pink, she considers and agrees - she thinks she has a voice in this (which, uh, ironic). It was still an act of rebellion and it honestly feels like she thinks she's acting under her own free will

- Pink squatting! Rose never does that with Pearl, even when she's so much larger! But Pink is so much taller that interacting with her would be a pain for Pearl, that's the point where she goes down to her level

- like, "status difference" isn't something that pings me automatically, but presenting a(n absolutely massive) power imbalance where the people in the relationship are at least superficially aware, and one person tries to act up, and the other tries to act down (with variable success, admittedly), that's fantastic stuff

- the rest are going to have to process that even though things are more muddled now, Rose still did everything they already knew she did

- (Rainbow Quartz’s nose finally makes sense)