#on the other end of the spectrum i dont give a fuck i never asked you're supposedf to be helping me

[lara-cairncross]

my personal sonadow headcanons in no particular order bc im procrastinating on writing a research paper right now and its either do this or throw myself off the roof:

Shadow is a few inches shorter than Sonic, but ONLY if he takes his shoes off. cue many years' worth of shenanigans with Shadow doing everything in his power to avoid going barefoot in Sonic's presence because he knows if Sonic finds out he'll never hear the end of it (hes right)

T4T SONADOW

Sonic was able to get top surgery, but Shadow's body healed itself too quickly for it to work on him. flash forward to when he gets his Black Doom abilities and one of his first orders of business is to fuck around with them until he's able to give HIMSELF top surgery

Sonic hates coffee beans (too bitter) and Shadow hates chili dogs (too heavy/savory). they've broken up over this enough times for Rouge to lose count

Sonic is so good at flirting with everyone EXCEPT SHADOW. HE GETS TOO FLUSTERED. HE TRIES SO HARD AND IT NEVER WORKS BUT SHADOW IS TOO DOWN BAD TO CARE

Shadow grew up on a space station, with no biological reason to eat, and no access to fresh food or a kitchen. Sonic literally raised both himself AND TAILS. Shadow is NOT the cook between the two of them please everyone keeps saying otherwise and i dont understand it you cant convince me shadow knows how to boil a pot of water PLEASE SOMEBODY AGREE WITH ME

Sonic ages. Shadow doesn't. 50 years down the line somebody asks Sonic if Shadow is his son. Shadow immediately gets payback for 50 years of short jokes.

they are both so smart and so capable and so dangerous by themselves but if you put them in the same room in any context outside of a life-or-death situation they become the two dumbest motherfuckers you've ever had the displeasure of engaging in polite conversation with

shadow bottoms what who said that

okay this one might be silly but I feel like they would both be good at chess??? like Sonic is surprisingly well-read and more observant than people give him credit for, and Shadow probably had a lot of strategy training from GUN + played games with Maria on the ARK. idk i just feel like it would be a fun way for them to challenge each other outside of just racing/combat yknow

they both wear jewelry with each others' colors :] i usually make it earrings but i think Sonic having bracelets to mirror Shadow's rings would be really cute too

autistic Shadow and ADHD Sonic yes please yes yes yes

Sonic is the most verbally affectionate and Shadow is the most physically affectionate IM RIGHT YOU CANT ARGUE WITH ME ON THIS ONE IM PUTTING MY FOOT DOWN GOODBYE

they like to beat each other up a little toooooo much and its kinda toxic maybe but also theyre both having fun so like. maybe its just a love language 🫶🫶

Tails is so, SO disappointed with Sonic for his choice in men. like he actively considers holding an intervention when he finds out that Shadow and Sonic started dating

theyre both somewhere on the aromantic and asexual spectrums because uhhhhhh so am i and i can project if i want to

Sonic is a chronic yapper and Shadow is a listener BUT. HEAR ME OUT. IT STARTS TO SWAP AS THEY GET MORE COMFORTABLE WITH EACH OTHER. shadow comes out of his shell and feels more at ease talking, and sonic appreciates having someone who doesnt expect him to be at full energy/optimism 24/7 and lets him be silent when he needs to be

[gofishygo]

mito mito mito hihi 😋

i’ve been having some thoughts n i felt like sharing w the class newayssss

so i was having bubble tea earlier and i started thinking,,,,what cod characters would like it? i feel like price def wouldn’t,,simon wouldn’t mind it but he does def think its too sweet and proper tea is superior and blah blah blah (i acc don’t know im kinda divided on that like i hc him as a sweet tooth but bubble tea,,,ehhh i feel like he wouldn’t like it all that much like he’d be all grumbly about it,,, idfk

johnny and gaz i think would like it lots ,,

i also think alex wouldn’t like it abd farah would (i js like hc farah as this secret softie ok leave me alone 😞)

but THAT got me thinking,,,, what other food preferences would they have ?? i think gaz would rlly like sushi (saw a fan art of him on a sushi date w the reader and i forgot who made it but ):$/:)/&!:!!!!! it was so cute) and i also think gaz would handle spicy food well ?? and he would like seafood in general methinks (tryna think of some select seafood items he wouldn’t like but im drawing a blank bc im vegetarian shusbssjnsuen)

idrk ab simon and johnny and price,,,,,,out of them 3, i feel like simon or johnny would have the biggest sweet tooth (they’re on like completely dif ends of the spectrum character wise but shh i js know it) but they all eat A SHIT TON like the food could be burned or too salty or smth but if they’ve js come back from a mission then they’re eating that shit UP. and asking for seconds. and thirds. they would still give u food feedback if it’s some other day tho

also johnny is extremely passionate about haggis. no i have never tried it yes i js know he is ok moving on

KONIGGGG hmmmm,,,, i have no fucking idea lmao i think? a lot of german cusine involves bread and stuff,,,so……………i think he’d have rlly bland meals idk

i’ve been rlly into keegan lately but i cant come up w anything for him aaaa

also gaz would be the only one who knows how to use chopsticks. the others would learn fast being in the military and all but gaz and chopstick skills js make sense???

ANYWAY im soso sry for rambling sm lmao this is a lot of words,,,,,and this isn’t a req by any means !!! js needed to hear ur thoughts bc food is js calling to me like “ok but would blank character like this” like. urgh. ok im done now i think but yeah food preferences for cod characters of ur choice

ALSO !!! THE IOS SHARK STICKERS REMIND ME OF U,,,,,look at them$:!!;&:!3 OK IM ACC DONE NOW BYE BEY MITO HIPE U DONT FALL ASLEPE READING ALL THAT

AHHH hi weebun !! ^^ i was literally having bubble tea with my sister like a few hours ago and when i checked the inbox n saw this i BOLTED !! sorry for never responding to this, i forgot inbox existed..,

notes: shittily wrote as this as a warmup/just general yap :> sorry for messiness and incoordination.., platonic, no warnings !! unless ur lactose intolerant idk

so you'll be jus chillin w the 141 on base and then say something like "boba is absolute gas shits better than normal tea" and of course, since the majority of the taskforce is british, you get absolutely fucking jumped for it. like- keep in mind, you say this price, the NUMBER ONE TEA AND BISCUTS DEFENDER, so you do end up getting toilet duty for a week with the explanation of 'uncordial behaviour.'

but after your deployment, you are the one to arrange where the 141 meet up. it's a little ritual you guys have developed to stay connected in between missions, one that makes your friendship seem a bit more real. sometimes the only thing that keeps your eyes open and heart pumping. and since you're an absolute fucking menace, you ask if you can meet around the heart of london- and then drag them all into the nearest bubble tea store you can.

-

price... doesn't end up liking it. takes a total of two sips, nearly chokes on the pearls, and then sets the cup down. he claims he's been around long enough to know that this- like many other foods, is probably some 'trendy millennial bullshit that'll disappear in a solid few', but that doesn't help ease the insane side eye that he gets from the cashier.

but to your surprise, ghost seems somewhat okay with it. his face doesnt really change (from what you can tell- his mouth is still hidden due to some face mask he put on), but he seems neutral, relaxed, even. he mutters something along the lines of how it isn't too bad, but it doesn't beat a cuppa- to which you chose to ignore, and how he'll probably just stick to having an earl grey in the mornings. but a few months later, you catch him at the same boba store, and you cant help but giggle to yourself.

soap fucking inhales the drink. its genuinely concerning, to say the very least. he seems to like.. unhinge his jaw like some kind of snake, and then inhales the whole drink in what you think is a millisecond. and since he's the only scotsman on the team- thinks the whole 'tea n biscuits' ritual his colleagues have is utter stupidity, so not only does he now FREQUENTLY drink boba because he likes it- he also drinks out of utter spite.

gaz is the only one with a seemingly respectable opinion about boba, unfortunately. he's had it before, multiple times- it appeals to his sweet tooth and is the occasional treat after long missions. but unlike you, gaz does not value peace, and seems to keep egging soap on in chugging unreasonable amounts of the drink. (and he doesnt mention it, as he does not want to face the same punishment as you did, but he thinks that bubble tea is sometimes, just sometimes better than his cuppa.)

masterlist (some of my other stuff is better promise)

[hypothermiatapes]

These people need to chill in general with the top/bottom bc it's just out of control lmao. Topping or bottoming doesn't mean you necessarily label as a top or bottom... It's not just a label its also a literal physical sex position. But a label can be a spectrum and treating it as black or white aka you topped someone so you HAVE TO be called a top??? You're not allowed to ever bottom or even enjoy bottoming? You can identify as a top but still bottom on rare occasion and vice versa, i promise it won't hurt you lol.

Plus people dont argue this way over Harry being gay vs bi? Bc with that people are fine to accept sexuality as a spectrum so long as they get the end result they want: Tomarry. But not something as simple as a sex position??? Instead that has to be a huge deal where it HAS to be one way and never the other or else its the end of the world.

I want people to realize the only stupid reason behind this argument is people imposing their preference on others, instead of the contrived bullshit that gets thrown around all the time. Like we get it. You don't like it that way. No one asked for you to bother everyone with that just so you can feel valid for trashing on other people's preferences

THIS!! I like you, and I’m so happy you sent me this ask because you’re so right.

I actually don’t give a single shit about the sex dynamics between these two because sex is just sex for me, doesn’t matter what position they favor. I’m also asexual so I care even less. I think people just need to chill a little and have fun instead of being so concerned about how literal fictional characters fuck.

[sicklyseraphnsuch]

Management Styles Pt. 1

I find it deeply fun that both the Queens have very similar management styles albeit for different reason. Both Riddle and Vil operate essentially on "might makes right" and "shame to tame".

Vil will cut you down for not acting in a way that fits his definition of beautiful, especially if you're lazing about. Riddle will cut you down for not acting in accordance with his rules, especially if you're lazing about. Both aspire to this lofty concept - order and beauty, and for the most, strong arm people into agreeing. They're quite aggressive so they will seek out behaviors to correct.

Meanwhile, on the other end of the spectrum, Idia who couldn't give two shits about what anyone in his dorm is doing because he's got the most antisocial dorm ever and they're pretty self governing. When they bitch about each other, its always personal because their otakus who will disagree over the slightest differences in interpretation. But like management? structure? what is that?

(Which is what makes Idia's attempt at asserting leadership in Ch 6 sooooo funny. He doesnt really have a way of getting people to fall in line so naturally the other folks started bitching at him)

Now, Ortho's management is a little more advanced. He operates more on a "distract with the shiny" to get them off his back while he actually gets to work. He never actually works with other people because he is in fact not that great of a team player (super robo boy with five million advanced programs can do it all so why ask for help?) but hes better at tricking people to get off his back so he doesnt have to deal with them anymore than necessary

Incidentally, Jamil is the same way. He also prefers to do everything himself and if people are working with him, you better believe that they are under his Direct Supervision. But, when people dont fall in line with his wishes, he relies on his unique magic/signature spell to make up the difference. He's not like either Riddle or Vil who browbeat into obedience simply because that shit would not work on Kalim. However, Kalim can be distracted with shinies at the risk of making more work later if Kalim gets particularly "inspired" by said shiny. In short, Jamil doesn't manage people more than he magicks them into complacence.

Now, somewhere in the middle between outright authority and fuck it I'm doing this myself, there's Azul and Leona. They mostly take control of people via bribes. They are canny negotiators who know what people want and give it to them for a price. Of course, if directly challenged, Leona will throw down and Azul sends out the twins. But for the most part, they rely on clever tricks to get what they need from people. They will avoid violence - mostly because that's just trying too hard.

(And yeah, Leona absolutely believes that Riddle and Vil are too high strung)

As for Malleus... He mostly gets his Dad to do things for him.

[etherealspacejelly]

hi dad, i'm having some internal conflict. i've always been a really anxious person (which is probably due to undiagnosed anxiety disorders) and i've never really "fit in." i've been treated as weird all my life. i've never understood tone and i get in a lot of trouble with my parents for this (even though i've explained i can't control it), i go nonverbal for brief periods of time occassionally, loud noises and bright lights cause me pain like extreme headaches, i always feel the need to follow self-created routines in order to feel safe, i don't understand social boundaries all too well, i intensely hyperfixate, i'm extremely hyperempathetic, etc. i've never understood why i'm the way i am. then i started learning more about autism and i think i may have it. many of my autistic friends seem to think so.

but my parents don't believe me and don't like me researching mental health stuff. they don't think i'm "autistic enough" because my mom used to work with autistic kids who were almost always nonverbal and on a more extreme end of the spectrum. i mask all the time too, as a defense mechanism since i get in so much trouble for misunderstanding. hell, my parents won't even get me an official anxiety diagnosis (even though i've had symptoms since the moment the signs can appear) because they think "labels don't matter."

and the big problem that comes along with this is, i don't want to self diagnose and seem disrespectful to diagnosed autistic people. i've done a lot of research and gotten a lot of opinions from neurodivergent people in my life, but i still feel fake because i have no access to a diagnosis. so many people have told me to try to get one and my parents completely refuse.

is it okay to self diagnose? will diagnosed people find this disrespectful? i'm not exactly sure how to go about this. it'll most likely be several years at best before i can get medically diagnosed.

tldr; i may be autistic but i have no access to a diagnosis and feel guilty about self diagnosing. any advice?

thank you and sorry if this was too vent-ish, i just wanted to see if you had any thoughts <3 feel free to ignore this ask if it's too overwhelming /gen

baby. honey. sweetpea. let me tell you something

autistic people actually dont care if you self diagnose. in fact, many of us are self diagnosed. diagnoses can be inaccessible for many reasons, and its perfectly understandable if you cant or dont want to get one

i can absolutely relate to you. my mum works with disabled kids too, and insisted that i couldn't be autistic because she "would have known". she considers herself an expert, but somehow missed all the signs in me. i guess because i am also quite high masking.

you definitely sound autistic to me, and if other neurodivergent people who know you agree then you probably are. autistic people can sense each other lol

i remember once when i friend of mine came to me and was like "hey btw im autistic" and i was like "yeah i know. you told me" and they were like. "um. no i couldnt have told you i only got diagnosed a few days ago and this is the first time we've spoken since then" and i was like. oh. i just Sensed it, you know? i just fuckin knew

so yes. you can self diagnose. thats perfectly fine. and if anyone tells you that you cant or that you're somehow "harming the autistic community" you can tell them to fuck off. self diagnosis does not harm the autistic community in any way, but it can really benefit people like you.

i hope someday you can get the accommodations you need and deserve. in the meantime, please give yourself grace. you're trying your best. and im proud of you, ok?

[vashsscoreboardofpain]

WELCOME BACK SPORTS FANS TO "VASH'S SCORE BOARD OF PAIN" :D

Another day, another chance for our contestant to speedrun one of the most expensive therapy bills ever

It is time for episode 3!

Our contestant wastes no time on this episode. Before the episode hits 2 minutes, stampede vash gets a "bad event" point for looking at someone exploding!. Under normal circumstances this would be a traumatic event but the referee saw no big reaction from the contestant.

After careful consideration, the suffering division has decided to give Stampede Vash 1 "bad event point" for the whole chase scene. It is not traumatic but everyone agreed that someone throwing small bombs/grenades at the contestant and the contestant's lack of effort for protecting himself deserves a point. Wait, hold up...

The lack of effort on protecting himself has given him 1 "action" point!

The debutant wont stop at that however. After getting shaken like a maraca (another "bad event" point for him) the episode starts to get serious. The contestant gets in a debate about revenge and gets to breathe for 10 seconds and then, he appears. Ladies, gentleman and people from multiple sides of the spectrum, give a warm welcome to the mvp of this episode, the one and only who will give stampede vash most of his points: Million Knives!

The audience is confused at the classical music, and the other contestants on the sidelines look so tense they have their guns ready.

The young contestant keeps going, and just before the round hits 11 minutes, he hits with 4 POINTS IN A ROW: 1 "action" point due to the lack of action in front of his brother and his insults, 1 "yikes statement" point for the "you havent changed at all moment," 1 "action" point for not protecting himself from knives taking his gun and 1 "bad event" point for getting trapped...somewhere. ALL OF THIS IN JUST ONE MINUTE. TRULY INCREDIBLE. THE CROWD CHEERS FOR STAMPEDE VASH.

Once he gets freed from...that...place, THERE HE GOES AGAIN, ANOTHER "BAD EVENT" POINT FOR SEEING HOW HIS BROTHER CUTS SOMEONE ELSE'S ARM. THE DEBUTANT JUST WONT STOP.

The contestant disappears for a couple of minutes, but it looks like he will go all out in this round. No matter how many points he has, he will keep getting more. Right before knives takes the plant the contestant arrives to get more points thanks to his brother. He gets 1 "action" point since he shows his brother asking him which side is he on clearly distresses him, 1 "bad event" point for shooting at knives and realizing theres nothing he can do, and here it is people in the audience, he gets THE FIRST "TRAUMATIC EVENT" POINT. THE CROWD GOES FUCKING WILD WHILE THE 2 OTHER VASHS COVER THEIR EYES.

STAMPEDE VASH RUNS AWAY FROM THE CHAOS HIS BROTHER BRINGS, AND WHILE RUNNING HE GETS ANOTHER "YIKES STATEMENT POINT" FOR WANTING TO KNOW WHY KNIVES IS DOING ALL THIS. THIS GUY IS TRULY ON FIRE!

AND THEN, peace arrives. the setting is quiet, the episode is about to end, but even with 4 minutes left, stampede vash still has more to give in the playing field.

Just right before the episode ends, stampede vash gets 1 "action" point for his reaction when rosa calls his brother a monster, another one when rosa tells him he should have never been there, ANOTHER ONE when rosa calls him the humanoid typhoon, AND FINALLY, TO CLOSE IT ALL IN A PERFECT AND TRAUMATIC LITTLE BOW-

Stampede vash gets 2 more points: 1 "action point," for smiling through his pain, and 1 "yikes statement" point, for the "i dont deserve to cry statement."

the contestant falls onto the floor, tired. both emotionally and physically. while the doctors take him away the suffering division counts the points. Officially, stampede vash adds 18 POINTS TO HIS TALLY. THE AUDIENCE WHO CAME FOR THE DEBUTANT HAVE NEVER SEEN SOMETHING LIKE THIS

THIS MEANS STAMPEDE VASH SO FAR HAS A TOTAL OF 35 POINTS.

PLEASE SHARE YOUR OPINIONS ON THIS ROUND WITH THE #VASHSSCOREBOARDOFPAIN

WE WILL SEE YOU FOR THE NEXT ROUND SOON SPORTS FANS

[ispreadrabieslikewildfire]

Please tell me about Harper and Feena!

OMEHAGUROHMEGAUR OKOKOKOKOKOKOK SOSOSOOSOSOSO (thamk yo uso much TEHE) alao im sorry if this makes NO SENSE im spilling my head into paragraphs and not proofreading rhis is gonna end HORRIBLY but i hope you enjoy😭!

Anwyay so harper and feena started when @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat asked me to draw a silly guy eating monster much and he turned into harper (ill link some pictures to show) and he felt lonely so i made him a friend called feena and theyve been a thibg since then HOLY SHIT I THINK ITS BEEN 2 YEARS?????

Harper and feena r supposed to be my silly ocs that are my go toos when i start daydreaming and drawing! Their not supoosed to have too much trauma and stuff (IM CONTAINING MYSELF) so i camt head empty and harper its also so when i draw them they make me happy they are my happyness. So becazue i cant give them trauma i make altermate realitoes where i CAN give them trauma!!

Im gonna make sections so i caj explain everthing so it can atleast try to make sense

1. THEIR RELATIONSHIP :3

Ok so when i started I made them friends ofc!! And i thought they where cool as hell so i started thinking about their relationship and i was thinking how wierd it would feel if they where a couple so their thing is that their completely platonic and are jist realy close friends that are realy comfortable with each other, i wouldnt say like 'siblings' but more like that one cousin that your realy close with. I like to think of them as denji and power from chainsaw man (however i see denji and power as more of siblings) but no matter how close they get with eachither they dont feel anything romantic :3 i have a thing that when they where 14/15 they where like fuck it lets kiss and they hated it!!!!! they wanted to die!!!!!

I also have different ages for them i draw them as for whatever mood im in! So i have toddler harper and feena (theyve met in primary school) and then children harper and feena (10-12) and then theres also teen (14-16) and preadult idk forgot what its called (17-19) and adult! (20-22) by 20-22 they have an appartment with 2 other roomates nadia and caspian i dont realy have a story for them yet however they do have designs. So basically they jsut spend their entire lives together as besties and this is their main world where their happy and have no trauma and are just silly!!

2. Sexualities n stuff

Well im nor good at this stuff since i realy have no kmowledge but i kinda just peojected me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto them...

Harper:

Bisexual, he/they. Dyslexic and/or is on the autism spectrum idk i dont think much about this

Feena:

Aro/ace or Asexual i havent decided, goes by anything. I honestly dont even know she is any and all illnesses

3. Childhood and all

So i dont wanna give them a traumatic childhood since their my silly chracters!!

HOWEVER, they do have some sort of backstories.

Feena:

Some sort of religious trauma, her family where 100% praise our lord and saviour jesus christ and she didnt feel part. Knew what she was when she was a teen and after harper came out and was more comfortable. Didnt tell her parents until she moved out, (they very obviously didnt take it well) however is still in touch with them!! Their just kinda realy uncomforable whenever the subject changes to jesus or gay stuff idk.

Harper:

Twas a bit (a lot) stupider than most people his age (austismmmmm) his parents payed more attention to their sisters so that they could have a better education instead of wasting their time on a child thatll never learn and refuses to listen (wasnt diagnosed till he was an adult so they thought he was being annoying purposefully). Tbh just whats a hug LMAO. He came out to his parents, they told him it was just a phase and theylll get out of it eventually.

So ya!

4. The cats need their own section

So ive always eanted these 2 cats, one called jester one called mariposa. So if i cant have them whats better than having my oc that represents me having them?

This is jester! (SHES PREFECT THIS IS HOW I ENVISION HER)

This is mariposa :3

5. Universes

Like i said since i dont want harper and feena to have too much trauma i create new universes for them! Other than my main ailly one theres another 3 i favour out of all the ones i make

1. I made a dystopian after apocolypse one (MY PERSONAL FAVOURITE ITS SO FUN TO MAKE!!) where the aftermath is that the world (well at leats where their living) is split into two, the privlidged and less priveledged (I NEED NAMES FOR THESE I DONT HAVE ANY) anywwy what i think i can best decribe this as is like the hunger games, where theres the 'capitol' and the 'districts' but instead of there being districts its all just survival of the fittest L lmao so yah. So after the apocolypse harper and feena are split up. Feena ends up with the privileged and harper ends up with the less. Harper finds a place he can call 'home' (FOUNDFAMILYFOUNDFMILYFOUNDFAMILY) and feena ends up on the other side where she gets her memories wiped and she then hets brainwashed to belive she was sent down as a gift from god during hard times and everyone is supposed to worship her (tehe i wont bother yiu with any more of this story)

2. Silly little 80s teen ghost busting show like scooby doo with harper feena nadia and caspian

3. detective harper and feena (havent built a lot)

6. I FORGOT TO ADD DYNAMIC

So basically feena can be smart when she wants to but chooses to fuck around with harper, quite a bitch if you guys just met. Pretty resereved when shes around people she doesnt know amd her social skills arent great. If you give her a chance she can be quite nice and passionate. Can ramble for hours on ends

Harper, guys hes trying his best. Loud, can ramble for hours on end too.

And thats all i can think of...sorry for ramblong so much i jist realy love them. i dont expect anyonw to actually read this... Once again this is just me projecting me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto harper anf feena!

Thank you @rainbowghostcat sososoososo much i love youuahahhah <333

Ill attach drawing of them in the mprning!

[brattylikestoeat]

Hi Bratty,

I really appreciate you talking to us and keeping it 100% w/the things you choose to share. I also appreciate you putting us up on a LOT of game. Could I pls ask the following sex questions? I was raised in a dysfunctional/abusive fam. where asking about things re: sex, bodily changes, etc. was a HUGE NO so pls forgive any "silly" questions =[

So, 4 someone like me who's still a virgin & wants to know the healthiest way to go about sex, are you meant to:

Get yourself tested first

(after I've decided/vetted a person & decided I'd like us to be sexual partners) insist on seeing his latest test and/or get tested together

always shower or clean up and pee first and insist that he does the same?

shower/clean up and pee after we're done?

but I've seen and heard instances - some of the stories you've shared here too - where you've been able to get oral or have sex in the car before work or elsewhere, and (unless you didn't mention it and you don't have to cuz again, it's always w/e u want to share w/us) there was no mention of cleaning up or peeing. So, does that mean it's optional? But, what about UTIs?

I'm confused. How are things supposed to happen (or, not "supposed" cuz every1 is different. I guess I don't know how to properly ask this but all I'm after is great sexual health for me and w/whoever I decide to have sex with).

(Part 1)

People lie a lot. People will try to pass off old test or falsify paperwork. There is a big rise in this since onlyfans. Most onlyfans girls will only work with me with recent paperwork and a lot of men lied. That’s why solo content is more prevalent than couple content.

I always say get tested together. Make a date out of it. Me and Ted did the first time. we both got tested, went and had lunch and went to a movie. By the end of the movie the test results were sitting in our emails. Check to verify the date. And know that test results aren’t always 100%. Some std/sti can be dormant or people can be asymptomatic. 

Cleaning up isn’t optional but it’s a preference if that makes sense.

- TMI Donald dont care of I just got off a 10 hour shift and went to the gym. He will eat the pussy as soon as I walk in. I personally don’t like that. I prefer to shower.

- TMI I’m okay with a certain level of sweat. Most men (to me so this is a personal Opnion) smell better with a little sweat. I don’t know the science behind it but that shit turn me on. Some will says it’s nature and pheromones. But idk. A little sweat ain’t gone scare me.

- I always pee after sex and if I can’t pee that second I’m headed to the nearest bathroom. I’ve fucked outside and in a parking garage. Both times we immediately went home to pee and shower.

When it comes to sex I feel like only two things should be consistent across the board, 1) being tested and 2) consent.

Everything else is personal preference. Some men like smelly women, some men don’t. Some women want a man who hung some women don’t.



Some people shower before and after, some shower just after.

I’ve had 8 sexual partners and none of them were the same at all.

TG and Ted fall on opposite ends of the sexual spectrum in what they like. So it’s up to me to say, yes I’ll do that or no I won’t.

TMI Donald into watersports but that’s just something I’ll never do. I damm sure won’t be receiving but I also don’t want to give.

As far as UTIs I’ve never had once. Some women are prone to get them more than others. This is why you should know what’s normal for your vagina.

[hellishvxbes]

I realize I could be compliant and block you, but considering you have multiple other blogs, i really doubt you're going to stop looking. So why bother? I was going to message you directly, but you blocked me again before I could get the chance. And I'm not interested in sending anons.

I guess I am just waiting for you to get bored. because its really being blown out of proportion. and I'm saying this for everyone now, because I do not care what mental health problems you have, what disabilities, it DOES NOT give you the right to be an asshole. It is NOT a free pass to get away saying insensitive things to people and not to expect backlash from it so entitled as shit.

Whatever you are dealing with, it is YOUR responsibility to learn and deal with it. I am not your therapist. I can understand and respect that things get missed, social cues and all that, I have a lot of friends who like me are on the spectrum, ADHD, dyslexic. I have depression, anxiety and PTSD and guess what?? I don't make that everyone's problem. I respect people who can come to me and tell me if I missed the ball on something, or I was being rude or something i said bothered them. because if I dont know, how the fuck am I gonna learn?

Roleplayers are not their characters. WE ARE REAL PEOPLE, with REAL feelings. We have lives, we make mistakes. my issue with you, is you claim to have been straightforward but really you were just rude and tried to blame on it on the fact that you don't understand social cues and its why you come off as rude. but i think you are just rude.

I was really understanding of it before, when we talked. I told you many times, what the real reason behind why I was upset and you ignored it every time and only focused on what I said. I reached out solely to inform you that the way you word things is important and if you said those things to someone else? They would not be as understanding as I was. and i feel like a little bitch for admitting it but it made me cry when i saw your messages.

but yes, i dont expect everyone to be my friend, i wasn't naïve in thinking that we were but it makes people feel a type of way when you use them for information, ask for their help and then when you don't need it anymore you come and say how you didn't ever have intention of writing, or being friends and you're gonna block and move on ( which is laughable considering you haven't). And it made me cry because, in the last year, I have given so much of myself to people I DID consider friends and dropped me the moment i couldnt give them what they wanted anymore.

because the rpc has a big issue in not seeing their roleplay partners as people. they only exist to give them roleplays and that is not right or okay. and you did that shit on my birthday. when I was having fun with my friends, I had to stop and fight back tears until the end when I could finally be alone. and i dont say this for you to care, or feel bad. i dont really give a fuck how you feel at this point.

you were rude and inconsiderate towards me, and you've never once acknowledged your own faults. you lied to me about the real reason you wanted to block me, which is totally fine and respectable. but you could have just said that from the beginning instead of giving me false reasons and therefore me trying to find other ways to make you more comfortable. deny it all you want but that's what a lie is, you were misleading. and the moment I started to give you what you were giving me, which is disrespect, you ran away. which is why I am writing this now. because I know you won't stop. I know you won't confront me. if I bothered you so much the realistic thing to do would be to keep me blocked. but you cant? because I know internally its a you problem and actually has nothing to do with me. which is why I can be so calm and indifferent about it.

why I dont spend my days thinking about you, or talking about you. or bothering to try and look at your blogs cuz i dont care what you do or say about me or whatever else. its why i wont block you, because i dont need to do or anything actually. you're torturing yourself at this point. this will be the last thing I say on it though. i hope you figure your shit out. maybe go back to therapy and learn a little more to be better.

[xiaq]

Hi, I have a question re:sex and Christianity. Small background: I still go to church, and I still live with my parents even though I'm not much younger than you, because housing is very very expensive where I live (pretty common here, I would say about 2/3 of my friends live with their parents and we are decently privileged kids)

Anyway. How does one get over purity culture? To be clear, I've never been told in church not to have sex, I've never gotten the gendered lessons that you got. But I am terrified of having sex. My first real, multi-year relationship just ended and while there was hand stuff etc, there was never any p in v sex (lol I feel 12). But I still had insane anxiety about being pregnant despite being on bc. And I think its because I know my parents would be so disappointed if I had sex. And if I was pregnant I could imagine all the gossip. And honestly I think im from a pretty open church, b/c one of our previous ministers kids recently got married at 8 months pregnant and lots of church people were at the wedding and supportive and her parents were there and everything.

I dont even think I particularly like sex, i might be on the ace spectrum, but how do I remove it from all the anxiety that's tied to it so I can even give myself the chance to find out???

(Asking because it seems like you've been pretty open about purity culture/removing yourself from it)

CW for sex talk (again)

How does one get over purity culture?

Oh man. That really is the million-dollar question, huh? Obviously, I can only answer re my personal experiences, and this is something you should talk to a therapist about, but I can tell you how I’ve tackled it with my therapist at least.

Purity culture is, at its core, an ideology that is perpetuated by shame. If you’re indoctrinated into purity culture when you’re a kid, the concepts become baked into the way you construct your identity, your perception of self, and your perception of your sexuality. It’s practically intrinsic, by the time you’re an adult, to feel shame any time you’re reminded you have a body, much less a sexuality.

According to the chapels I sat through every week as a kid, a girl's body could be 3 things: an intentional stumbling block for men, an accidental stumbling block for men, or unnoticeable. Women were to strive for the third option so as to keep their (and their male friends/authority figures) purity intact. After all, if a boy, or even your male teacher, had impure thoughts about you, it was your fault for tempting them (which, holy shit. I still can’t believe that was a thing I bought into for so long. If my 45 yr old grown-ass teacher had impure thoughts because he could see my 12 yr old collarbone, that sure as hell wasn’t my fault. But I digress.) The Only time a woman’s body can be something else, is when she gives it to her husband, at which point she must suddenly flip the switch in her brain that she is now allowed to be a Sexual Being and she must perform Sexual Duties despite living in outright fear of her own body and sexuality for years (decades?) up until this point. Jesus take the wheel.

Purity culture isn���t a thing you can just decide to walk away from if you’ve grown up in it. Because its ideology is insidious and internalized. So first you need to submit to the fact that you’re going to be fucked up about sex. It sounds like you’re there. Second, you need to interrogate what you believe. If you’re leaving religion behind entirely, you’ll approach removing yourself from purity culture differently than if you still identify as a Christian. It sounds like you might be the latter, which meant, for me, separating what’s actually biblical and what’s shitty, contrived, doctrine that I was told is biblical but is actually more political than spiritual. This helps you address the shame issue.

You need to throw away I Kissed Dating Goodbye and Lady in Waiting and all those ridiculous books you read and reread in the hopes of somehow obtaining impossible marriage perfection and look into actual scripture interpreted within its historical context. I could write a book on this, but the TL;DR is that the text of the Bible was written, translated, curated, and changed multiple times over thousands of years by human beings with human biases and, often, personal and/or political agendas. It contradicts itself! Reading it as it is—a flawed historical document—rather than some sort of God-breathed perfect document—is incredibly freeing. When you do, you’ll probably realize that purity culture is bullshit on a spiritual level. Which is a good start, if that matters to you. Because any time you start to feel shame or guilt you can ask yourself: does God actually care if I wear a bikini or touch a dick I’m not married to? Probably not. Wear the bikini. Touch the dick.

The most important therapy session for me was when my therapist asked what I would do if I got to heaven and God was actually the God I’d been raised to fear. What would I do if he condemned me for being bisexual and having premarital sex and becoming educated, for arguing with men, and failing to isolate while menstruating, and wearing mixed fabrics? If Montero had come out at the point, I probably would have said I’d pole dance down to hell. Instead, I said I would spit on heaven’s gates. If a god that cruel and that pointlessly demeaning really exists—a god who would create in me condemned desire—I won't worship him. The good news is, I’m 99% sure he doesn’t exist. At the very least, he isn’t supported by scripture.

Okay. The final thing you need to do is figure out what you actually want, sexually speaking. This bit is probably the hardest. I’m still in the early stages of this myself. You say: “I dont even think I particularly like sex, i might be on the ace spectrum, but how do I remove it from all the anxiety that's tied to it so I can even give myself the chance to find out???” Bro, I wish I had an easy answer for you. For me, whenever I’m feeling anxious about Sex Things, I tell myself: 1. My God does not equate my worth to my sexual habits. 2. My partner does not equate my worth to my sexual habits. 3. I do not equate my worth to my sexual habits. It seems silly, but reminding myself of those three things is massively helpful. If, after I’ve sorted through those, I’m still anxious or uncomfortable, I stop doing the thing. I evaluate. Am I overwhelmed and I need to try again some other time? Do I just not like the thing? Sometimes it’s hard to tell. Sometimes you change your mind. Sometimes you just don’t know. That’s why having a partner who you trust and who’s willing to patiently explore your interests (and respect your disinterests) is so important. Half the battle, for me, was having a partner who told me they’d be ok with no sex at all. Because that took the pressure off me. If the bare minimum they need is nothing, then anything more than that is a bonus! Hooray! This is maybe TMI, but let me tell you. I thought I was asexual* right up until I was able to have moderately non-anxious sex. Never in my life did I think I would initiate a sexual situation but… I do now. It’s a fun thing to do with a person I love and, holy shit. I am furious that I nearly missed out on it.

Finally, re birth control: I don’t know how you can approach that fear in a way that works for you. If you don’t want to ever have penetrative sex, that’s fine! If that’s a point of anxiety you can’t get rid of, then don't push yourself to do it. If you find out you like other sex things, do the other sex things! If you don't like doing any sex things, don't do any sex things! Also, have you considered sleeping with people who can’t get you pregnant? Always an option if it’s an option you want to consider. ;)

Okay. I hope this was even a little bit helpful. Sorry if it’s a little convoluted, I typed it up in bursts during my work breaks.

*This is not at all to say that asexuality can be “fixed." Rather, it’s to say that things like purity culture can drastically confuse your sexuality in general. If you’re asexual, then this process is still important to discover what you like/dislike. Then you can be explicit about those necesities and find a partner who’s a good fit (if you want a partner at all, that is).

[lycanstonebutch]

BYF/DNI

+ Feel free to send me asks always!! Just make sure it respects the boundaries under the cut!!

+ You may see me use the word ‘Bobo’, bobo is a word created with me and my friends that groups together all Bimbos/Himbos/Thembos/Herbos/Bimboys/etc

Current anons: munanon -

+More important boundaries and info under the cut

Additional DNI / Information:

-Please do not follow and limit your interactions with my blog if your blog consists 75% of content about men, even fictional. I’m a butch lesbian trying to heal from trauma and explore nsfw things to reclaim them and im here to connect with other sapphics, not log onto this blog to be blasted by 58t94735897 pictures and texts and contents about men i do not care about.

-Diagnosed with D.I.D hence part of a system, I may talk about the experiences of being a system and how that can affect you sexually too or just some of the experiences of D.I.D, which talking of, one of my gf is actually part of our system. Both she and I are dating our other gf who is not part of our system and is in fact a singlet, we’re a lil triad and we’re happy that way. ON THAT NOTE THOUGH, ENDOGENIC SYSTEMS DNI.

-DNI IF YOU SUPPORT OR ARE A BI-LESBIAN OR MSPEC LESBIAN OR WHATEVER THE FUCK !!

-I may follow blogs that sometimes contains CGL, the reason for that is that I have every single possible tags or alternate tags blocked so I will not be exposed to it. Even then, the blogs I Do follow that may contain CGL usually are not CGL centred and are only occasional posts. If you are one of those blogs (I must follow you first), you may interact with my blog as long as you do not drag my posts into any CGL ideas through tags or other things. Please keep that kink away from my content. I also reserve the right to unfollow or block someone Ive followed/am mutual with if I feel like their CGL content ends up being too much or more present than I initially thought.

-I am traumatized and identify as grey-sexual on the ace spectrum. I am trying to reclaim sexual experiences and indulge in fantasies in a controlled way that will help me heal. Please keep in mind most of what I post about is more of a theory over practice thing.

-I have a tag named asmodeus.keysmashes and its a tag i use on posts where i just vent out a bunch of feelings or excitement or stim through keysmashes!! Feel free to block this tag

Boundaries:

-Please do not message me with romantic intent, sending asks is alright but please respect that I do have 2 wonderful girlfriends and I am not interested in dating strangers on tumblr, even those I may be mutual with for a while. While confessing or saying certain things within my other boundaries (only in asks, never in DMs) is alright, please don’t expect me to respond in any serious or committed or romantic way.

-Following that, you may ask me and confess to me about anything you want, but I reserve the right to delete and ask if it’s something I believe is weird or bad. Flirting or sexual asks are also alright, within reason that they are with no serious intent or expectation of relationship.

-When interacting with my posts, do not tag it with anything CGL related, even if you do not use ‘those terms’ as CGL, please dont. Continuing on what not to do when interacting with my posts is please never point out my chest, it gives me dysphoria.

What you will find on this blog:

Content:

Posts about my experiences being a traumatized and disabled stone butch lesbian with a funky gender

NSFW content about my fantasies or thoughts including pictures

NSFW posts reblogged from other creators including pictures

Occasional NSFW art of my characters

Posts about butch/femme culture and the lesbian community

Random rambles I keep off main because they’re more deeply personal

Kinks:

Dom/Sub dynamic | Clothed Sex | Petplay | Breeding | Monster Fucking | Occasional Somno | Occasional Hypno | Dumbification & a focus on Bimbos (& other bobos of the kind) |  Light CNC that has obvious consent in between the lines or even flat out said in the post | Boot Kink | Light Impact Play | More that I may edit in when i remember

Tags

asmodeus.talks || for my random rambles or thoughts

asmodeus.posts || precisely for my shorter nsfw posts n fantasies

asmodeus.writings || precisely for my longer fully written eroticas/stories

asmodeus.answers || for answered asks

asmodeus.pics || for my picture content

asmodeus.art || for my art

🐺|| fav stuff (althoguh i often forget to put it)

🐈💖 || stuff that reminds me of my gf/stuff i want her to see @catgirlhighfemme

🐟🐵 || stuff that reminds me of my gf or that i want her to see 💖💖💖

😽💚 || stuff that i want a precise cat butch to see 💕

[wetmithrun]

Elaborate more on that Kakyoin Polnareff Jotaro dynamic? Esp Polnareff and Kakyoin. I love seeing a teenager bully an adult man

hi im so sorry this took like 2 business days i kept forgetting i got asks. i have dementia (editing to add . im sorry this kind of became a kakyoin analysis and thats really funny because hes actually my least fave in canon :') )

(another editing to add. this aint even a kakyoin analysis this is a life analysis . of everyone . holy shit. oh my god)

looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooonnngg post below ;vv

anyway this is quite literally one of my favorite dynamics in jojo so far (these 3 but namely kakyoin and polnareff). i'm not a kakyoin or a jotaro expert but i like to think i am well versed in polnareffisms.

so as we know kakyoin never really socialized much growing up due to being a little freak weirdo who has a green monster. no hate 2 kakyoin but basically this means, in my opinion, he never developed a "real" personality because he had no one to reflect off of as a child and develop himself. and since we know that video games are one of his hobbies (and hes spent many hours playing that one particular racing game), i feel like he based some aspects of his personality on video game characters so often the shit he will say or do comes off as really uncanny and seems like something No Person In Real Life Would Ever Say Or Do

as a result he doesnt know how to talk to people or what's correct in social situations, ie when to be nice or when sarcasm is appropriate, or when to cry and feel sad etc. dont get me wrong, he understands sarcasm perfectly fine; in fact he got to fine-tune his sarcasm and rebuttal skills thanks to being one of dio's minions and living in that mansion where you have to be sharp as fuck or else the meanies are gonna tear you to shreds and not give a shit. another side effect of being a minion of dio, kakyoin also kind of became mean as hell. thats what happens when ur evil and also surrounded by mean evil people. once again, since he had no influences really growing up, he saw these people and became a social sponge and absorbed the way they talked to each other.

in short what im trying to say is, the little green booger is mean, awkward, Very strange, and still fumbling his way around relationships with other human people.

polnareff, on the VERY opposite end of this spectrum, grew up well socialized and very extraverted. he treats basically everyone like his friend as long as you dont insult him or hurt his feelings (which is amazingly easy to do) and in that case he'll either fight you or cry. it depends. or maybe both!

hes very in touch with his emotions and not afraid to express them; as a result whenever he Does experience a feeling he displays it Loudly and Dramatically. probably also because hes french.

as well as emotionally loud hes vocally loud. hes got a big mouth and a big voice and a big chest for it to resonate and echo around in. this was also very helpful for the environment he grew up in.

i personally headcanon that he grew up on a farm in rural france as sherry's sole guardian. they weren't in the meat business but rather animal products and crops. so think goats, cows, sheep, chickens- except they really didnt have all that much, because they grew up fairly poor. maybe 3 chickens and a rooster and like 2 sows (the pigs were used for truffle hunting if yall were wondering).

anyway this isnt a backstory post (but i can make one if wanted) so ill continue on with the social aspects.

another headcanon of mine is that jean's parents died when he was fairly young, somewhere between 12 and 14. so he had to take on the responsibility of a farm as well as raising sherry pretty early. subsequently, alongside being silly and flamboyant and easygoing, jean is always looking out for his friends and taking liabilities and feels responsible for nearly everything that happens. its why he was so hard on himself when something would go wrong during the trip to cairo; hes so used to being the caretaker, the one whose shoulders everything rests on, that when a disaster happens he gets in his own head about how he could have prevented it and its his fault for not doing so. (he took the deaths really hard.)

relating back to how emotional jean can be, hes also kind of like a Feelings Sonar. basically an empath supreme. he feels and reflects the energy of the people around him tenfold, which really sucks for him because the people hes around dont know how to be anything other than stressed out.

to kind of alleviate this he takes it upon himself to lighten the mood - nothing makes him feel better than making other people happy. so maybe he plays things up a little, acts a tiny more dramatic, gestures a little more, says off-color things at the wrong times. his antics almost never fail to at least get a grin, or even an eyeroll or a groan - hes content with that too.

he has a problem with boundaries though (both physical and emotional) so sometimes he pokes and prods too much, too far, anything to get a reaction; when someone snaps at him (usually nori) hes quick to escalate and take things to the extreme. (yea he experiences a wide range of emotions but no one ever said he could Control them or is even mature enough to try) its not uncommon to find nori and pol arguing with each other about something that started off as a joke, or even physically fighting (it usually doesnt get too bad, mostly shoves or 'roughhousing' but nori almost always wins because of hierophant) but sometimes if hes feeling silly or pathetic he'll hit nori w/ this face

and that usually (USUALLY) de-escalates the situation and they go back to being literal worsties.

also, honestly i think jotaro just doesnt care anymore. he finds pretty much everything annoying, those two especially. he doesnt quite get how or why theyre friends, or if they seem to hate each other so much, why do they still talk to each other.

speaking of jotaro. our very own mr kujo is somewhere in the middle between the two, emotions-wise. he often seems to be neutral to everything (on a good day), maybe even leaning towards annoyed or kinda pissed. something he would rather die before admitting though is that he actually does feel things, and hes not an apathetic monster of teenage hormones with the most serious resting bitch face since dio died.

usually his emotions are quite muted, even when he doesn't express them. physically, he might grunt, or his lips will twitch a millimeter, or he'll huff and sigh, or do that 'tch' thing or go yare yare and cross his arms. sometimes his face betrays him and thats what his trusty hat is for - he can easily pull the brim down over his face to hide any semblance of emotion cause he cant have bitches thinking he feels anything. (small note: polnareff has been forcing him to go hatless so he physically cannot hide his face. hes evil)

inside his head, its about the same. due to his quiet and reserved nature, he didnt talk about feelings or anything growing up and still doesnt now, so often when he feels something he cant figure it out or understand it, so he tends to bury it beneath apathy so he doesnt have to deal with something new - because that scares him. but jotaro cant be afraid, of course not, thats not allowed. if hes afraid, then what does that mean for everyone else?

aside from not being able to express himself properly, his emotions are hidden due in part to fear of vulnerability and being pulled apart, dissected like some kind of creature he took a scalpel to in middle school. (he went home and cried to holly that day.) mocked, ridiculed for being human and feeling things. anger, mostly, just anger. but that's something everyone feels, something men feel, so it's okay to get pissed off at the smallest things. that makes sense to jotaro at least.

as for his relationship with polnareff and kakyoin, they've helped him tremendously in his ordeal with emotions and expression. kakyoin's seemingly unafraid to be weird and bitter and sarcastic and uncanny (or maybe feels ... comfortable?) and jean's feelings, regardless of what they may be are always being aired out, conveyed in such intensity that even a stone wall like jotaro cant help but resonate in some kind of way.

the way polnareff and kakyoin so unabashedly dote on each other, hate each other, poke fun at each other, and encourage jotaro to do the same - well, maybe it has him coming out of his shell a bit. maybe sometimes he'll make a snide comment and catch polnareff off guard and flounder, or maybe sometimes he'll contribute to kakyoin's long, long rants about something he likes, maybe even chime in with more than a few sentences about his own interests.

........... so erm.

needless to say i think this is one of my favorite relationships in jojo ever and theyre all very healthy for each other. three weird kids who complete each other in almost every way and somehow manage to not kill each other in the process (though theyve come close)

so......... SO sorry about. all of that. let me know if you want me to elaborate on anything, dont be afraid to send another ask ;>>

[mariesocuniverse]

Relationships: NCT 127

Maeil (aka Daily)

there are two meanings to their ship name

first is, of course, their names mashed together but the second meanings is much cuter and the one fans use to explain their dynamic

When Mae found out their ship name was Maeil her first reaction was “Oh? Is it because I make sure to let Taeil hyung I love him daily?” while cuddling Taeil on a couch

he’s the same age as Mae’s older brother so she treats him as such

her brother is literally like “Are you replacing me with Taeil? I’m your reall brother!” and she’s just there sweating

part of Taeil’s hype squad and will fight donghyuck for the position of president

like the two were on vlive and spent a good fifteen minutes arguing about their positions in the club Mae won but donghyuck refuses to acknowledge it

he could be doing something simple and you can see Mae in the background with a big smile cheering

he’s also like her personal teddy bear whenever she wants cuddles and/or wants to rest

there are just multiple gifs floating around nct twt of Mae tackling Taeil for a hug or her just clinging to him on a couch because she’s either tired and wants to rest or just wants cuddles

absolutely adores his voice

there are multiple compilations on youtube about all the times Mae compliments Taeil on his voice and him just blushing the whole time

Maenny

was lowkey intimidated bc the man is a fucking tree and basically towers over her

but then he saw him play around with some other trainees and that thought disappeared real quick

he’s more like the protective older brother than like a parent like Doyoung or Taeyong

can and has used his height to his advantage when it comes to scaring people who hurt Mae or do something to make her sad

he was one of the first people who found out about her old company and he looked like he was about to storm their building probably would’ve if it weren’t for Mae

one of the first people she became friends with because he always answered questions she had when she was a trainees

before debut there were times people could see Johnny walk somewhere and Mae is just trailing after him like a lost puppy more like running because the man’s legs are long and he walks faster

there was this one time someone asked where Mae was and Johnny just shuffled to the side to reveal her behind him

his large frame was just big enough to hide her from everyone’s vision unless you walk past the two

you know that one vid of predebut nct performing Under The Sea with Johnny wearing the fish head? Mae was supposed to join him dressed as Ariel but the idea was cut last minute

there was this one time Mae couldn’t see something bc she was too short so Johnny lifted her up and put her on his shoulders

okay enough about Mae’s height

during shows he’s always encouraging Mae to talk more when she seems unsure whether to give her input or not

johnny, after an interviewer asks a question: “what do you think Mae?”

absolutely melts whenever she does aegyo because no matter how old she is he’ll always see her as the cute kid who followed him everywhere

MaeTae

honestly it’s hard to pinpoint where Taeyong’s protective parental energy started getting directed to Mae

like it might’ve been somewhere predebut but she doesnt know when

she’s like 50% sure she just blanked out and suddenly Taeyong appeared in her life scolding her for not taking care of herself

it’s not like she’s complaining abt it she’s really grateful to have someone like him in her life

when her family got worried abt her joining a group filled with guys he personally went to her house and calmly explained how Mae will be taken care of and how the group will make sure that she’ll be safe

first person to know if there’s something between SM and Mae that the other members don’t know about

he was also the first member to know about what happened with Mae and her old company

she knows she can trust him with anything

he found her alone crying in one of the practice rooms and she just poured her heart out to him

Whenever they go places as a large group he looks for Mae first before counting the other members

she got lost once and now he doesnt want her out of his sight for more than five minutes

she got him a “world’s greatest dad” trophy as a joke that he has on a shelf in his room

YuMae

you know how yuta acts with mark and winwin? yeah he does the same for Mae

if he isnt giving a hug to mark he’s all the way across the room with Mae giving her a back hug

Mae: does nothing

Yuta: aigoo look how cute she is :)

she doesnt ignore him tho she just returns the affection

likes to jump on his back for a piggy back ride or just run and jump to give him a hug

there was this one clip that went viral of Yuta talking to someone and he just pauses for a moment before turning around to catch Mae, who seemingly came out of nowhere, into a hug and turned back to his conversation

neither yuta nor the other person seemed fazed so this seemed like a regular occurrence to them

he teaches her japanese!

its beneficial to both of them because Mae can learn and Yuta won’t forget any Japanese while living in Korea :D

really really really loves his smile

like real whipped (A/N i wrote this while watching the under the sea performance and now im going through it)

like she sees him smile and that makes her smile and that makes fans smile

Can and has glared at “fans” and other people who make her uncomfortable whether it be at the airport or during their schedules

There was this one time Mae was walking ahead of him when there were fansites following them and he just pulled her back into his arms because he noticed an anti of hers was nearby

It’s like a lion trying to protect a kitten

2Young

again did not know how Doyoung because like a parent to Mae but she just ended up rolling with it

She just has this aura to her that makes you want to care of her and give her love

whenever they go eat together with the group he always put food on her plate, regardless of whether the managers glare at him or not he glares back anyway so they back off

“doyoung she’s been put on a diet-” “she’s going to eat whether you like it or not”

one time Mae got sick with a fever and he just burst into her room with medicine and soup

if taeyong has the “world’s greatest dad” trophy doyoung has the “world’s greatest mom” trophy that he says he’ll throw it away but has it perched on his desk

Mae’s also one of the members who like to clown him

she’s the one of the reasons he already has gray hairs

Mae has a folder of embarrassing photos of Doyoung’s childhood that his brother sent to her and refuses to delete it

she cant do anything about them tho bc Doyoung got his own folder of babie Mae pics courtesy of Mae’s older brother

Haechan has tried and failed to gain access to either of those folders

MaeHyun

major sibling energy

but not like the bickering kind of energy but more like very soft and uwu

there are a lot of people asking them “are you sure you’re not related?” during interviews and fansigns

Fans are just waiting for the two to do a duet bc come on SM you have a real life Disney prince and princess here

Let Mae be the Jasmine to Jaehyun’s Aladdin and perform A Whole New World together

She likes to poke his dimple

There’s this one vid where Jaehyun and Mae are sitting together and she just pokes his dimple and Jaehyun’s smile gets bigger

joked about if he could let her meet yugyeom and bambam bc of 97line and he just went no <3

when jaehyun was inkigayo’s mc nobody could approach her with the infamous inkigayo sandwich bc she was always with him not like anyone could try considering mae has several bodyguards wherever she goes

you know how jaehyun won the alpaca plushie in nct life? he gave it to mae bc he know how much she loved plushies

Honestly the majority of the plushies in her room were given to her by jaehyun

She has a bear named after him uwu

MaeWoo

Loves the energy he gives and thinks he’s so funny

He never fails to make her laugh whenever she needs cheering up

they used to be shy around each other when he first joined the group but they caught each other having a midnight snack so they just talked at 3am eating ramen until doyoung found them and told them to go to bed

now it’s just tradition for them to go to a convenience store together and eat ramen or whatever snacks they decide to get

nobody is allowed to join them its only a MaeWoo thing  

Mae has natural aegyo but Jungwoo has taught her to use it to her advantage which she does but not often

Another one of Mae’s cuddle buddies

She just thinks he looks so soft so she just clings to him whenever he’s nearby

Major uwu energy over here when it comes to the two of them together

idk why but i dont see him as the type to be protective when it comes to her dating

he’s more like

���you dont have a boyfriend yet? damn people dont know what they’re missing”

or on the other side of the spectrum

“good luck to your future boyfriend he’ll need it if he’s gonna date you”

2Ma/MaeKyung

Older brother that doesn’t feel like an older brother

Majority of the time he kinda just feels like they’re the same age or younger so newer fans get shocked when they find out she’s younger

Like there was this one time Johnny the two were playing Smash Bros and Mark was whining because he lost and Mae was jumping in the background cheering it was his fourth loss in a row but he won’t say it

they were kinda awkward around each other at first so johnny literally had to stick them in a room together and didn’t let them leave until they talked to each other

it worked and they just vibed and rambled about different topics like trainee life and what mark’s life in Vancouver was like

speaking of Vancouver

one time during their stay in Vancouver they wanted to have a friend date but he lost her at a mall and took twenty minutes trying to find her until she used the announcement service to call him

he wouldve ask his Vancouver friends to go with them but some of them had a crush on mae so no <3

When she first starting writing songs and her own lyrics she went to Mark first and asked if the lyrics she wrote were good

They were amazing and Mark made sure to tell her that :D

mae’s reaction to his dream graduation was one of the saddest things czennies have seen so when she found out he was coming back she would not let go of him

Literally could not stop smiling whenever mark was with the rest of dream filming for Resonance

It’s just very wholesome and czennies are willing to riot if SM decides to separate them

Maechan

You know how I said Maehyun was the soft and uwu type of siblings? Well Maechan are the bickering type of siblings

You know the ones who like to bicker over minor things but still would protect each other for life

they have so much dirt on each other on trainee days lmao

Haechan to Mae: lmao what a loser

Haechan when someone insults Mae: listen here you little shit

The only person allowed to clown her is him and the rest of NCT

he heard a trainee talk shit about her once and they still can’t look haechan in the eye

he’s only a few months older than her but he uses the “i’m older!” card whenever he can

“i’m older therefore i get to go first” “excuse me sir but you’re only three months older than me” “but im still older”

they fight for the title of the favorite 127 maknae but they both know that can do what they want

Mae is more lenient towards the hyungs during yaja time than haechan is tho so she just vibes whenever they go to scold him when the games over

they do team up a lot so they’re a menace when they do something together

especially in games

their competitive nature plus their brain power together? its over it even started

50% of the time they have to be separated from each other when it comes to choosing teams

the other 50% is someone choosing both of them because they want that easy win

Those two are willing to risk it all even for a bag of chips

[swiss-cheeze]

Please || Matthew Gray Gubler

Requested, YES/NO: Can I please request a female reader where she is chubby and by about her appearance and she and Matthew are in a relationship but she is scared he is going to leave her for someone more pretty. So he gets into an argument about why she is acting weird and she confesses and basically it ends with him showing her how beautiful she is and smut and after care?

Gender: she/her, female.

Warnings: body worship, talk of food and weight gaining due to food (unhealthy mindset from the reader i guess?), reader calls themself a ‘troll’, self-abuse/hurtful words to oneself, sex.

-------

“You ready pumpkin?” Matthew asked as he walked into the shared bedroom; only to see you in your underwear squishing your stomach with a sad frown, “oh baby” Matthew pouted as he came up behind you, his arms wrapped around your stomach and pulled you into his back, “just not a good day?” you shrugged, it was hard to speak without crying, “we don't have to go out,” his voice was small as he peppered kisses down your neck while thumbing at your stomach. Your breath shuddered as you walked to your closet and picked out your comfort outfit and sniffled, “sweetie i promise we don't have to go” Matthew stood still in the middle of the room while you stood in front of the closet trying your hardest not to break down, “you can stay here, i'll go alone bubby”

“I'll be okay,” your voice was scratchy and barely a whisper but Matthew somehow heard it.

“I don't want you to go somewhere where you’re not comfortable,” Matthew retorted, god you loved this man.

“Please,” it was a whimper.

Please just drop it.

Please just let me do this.

Please hold me.

Please tell me if I'm enough.

Please don't touch me.

Please help me.

The thing that brought you back to earth was the kiss Matthew gave to the crown of your head before exiting the room; leaving you with the click of the door and the screams of your inner demons and voices. You shook your head to try and rid yourself of the voices before grabbing your comfort outfit and getting dressed; it was a red carpet event after all, you couldn't be late, or look bad.

-----

“Oh my god it's Jennifer Aniston!” Matthew whispered with a grin as said model and actor stepped out of her car and started making her way onto the carpet. Matthew hugged your sides - your chubby sides - and squeezed you into him as cameras flashed.

“Matthew over here!”

“Gubler this way!”

“Oi, look at me! Perfect!”

God it was so loud even in this open venue. You tried to keep your smile light and happy but anyone who was anyone could see exactly what was going on in your head; you were only brought back to earth for the second time today by the pull of Matthew. You're leaving! Finally! After a-

“Hello! I am here with Matthew Gray Gubler and girlfriend (Y/n) (L/n)!” a voice called.

Fuck.

Interview.

Smile and wave boys, just smile and wave.

“How are you enjoying the place so far Matthew?” the interviewer asked as you finally got a good look at her; long blonde hair, perfectly chiseled face, tight waist, small stomach, skin tight dress, long legs, perfect pedicure and manicure…

“(Y/n)?” Matthew jolted you slightly as you stared at the interviewer.

“Yes?” you questioned.

“How do you feel tonight? You've got many models and actors around you, is it a bit overwhelming being with an actor?” god even her voice was sexy.

“Um, no, no it's good!” you gave a fake small and jolted yourself to a fake happy, “it's great being around those i admire and watch in shows and movies; Chris Evans, Simon Pegg; i think even Ben Hardy and a few others i admire are here too” you gave a grin and looked around while talking to give the impression you were looking for the people you were talking about.

“Well that sounds good!” The interviewer gave a forced laugh, almost like she was bored, “are you wearing anything special or is this just the sunday look?” her giggle was what caught you on the insult.

“Excuse me?” Matthews hand on your waist tightened as you spoke.

“Darling-”

“Your outfit is a bit old…” the interviewer paused, “a bit outdated?” this made you go quiet; now your comfort outfit is ruined.

“Excuse us,” Matthew mumbled as he guided you away from the interviewer and into a quiet corner.

“What-”

“Did you want to go home?” Matthew cut you off, he was stern and to the point.

“What? No of course not-”

“Your comfort outfit has just been insulted, I know how much you love this outfit and I know how amazing it makes you look every single time you wear it,” Matthew waited a moment as he looked at you with all the love in the world.

“But what about-”

“It's just a party” Matthew reminded you, he always had a habit of making bad situations into good ones.

“No, no I promise I'm okay baby,” you gave the most convincing smile you could, Matthew was hesitant but eventually gave in as you continued the red carpet and did another 3 interviews...all while being surrounded by lovely size 6 women who have flat stomachs, nice legs and nice breasts. While you were on the heavier side of the spectrum you couldn't help but thank yourself for your breasts; they were not huge but they weren't small like some actresses were because their body was small in comparison. And Matthew adored your breasts; always held them and stuffed his face in them to make you laugh, always leaving marks and bruises in the perfect places that only you know about...so you just kept that same mentality through the rest of the night.

He loves me.

That's all I need.

He loves all of me.

He could go for better.

But he chose me.

God he could totally go for better.

Look there’s Aniston and her perfect body-

No stop!

God and now A.J., and Paget; even Kirsten looks better in any outfit than i do.

No matter how much you tried you just couldn't stop thinking how much better Matthew would be with someone smaller than you; someone who could give him lap dances and not have rolls, someone he could throw over his shoulder easy, someone he could pick up from behind, someone who could sit on his face and not crush him...this is gonna be a long night.

------

When you got home that night all you wanted to do was law down in bed and weep, but of course you had a boyfriend whom you lived with.

“Did you like the movie (Y/n)?” Matthew asked as he hung his coat, a big dopey grin plastered on his face. You shrugged.

“Was a movie,” was your only response before walking into the bedroom and striping to your underwear.

“Okay…” Matthew mumbled, he knew something was up but he didn't want to push it, “want to order in or something then?” he called through the house, “maccas? Thai? Ooo I could go for some good sushi or honey soy chicken; oh my god AND NOODLES!” he sounded too excited for what seemed to be a weight gaining meal. Matthew bounded into the bedroom with a grin before stopping short.

There you were.

Head in your hands.

Shoulders shaking.

Silently sobbing.

“Baby?”

“Please leave me alone,”

“Please tell me what's wrong...you’ve never been like this; you've always loved yourself,”

You sniffled before going silent for a moment.

“I've always been like this; i'm just good at hiding it from everyone,”

And it suddenly made sense.

When you get a smaller plate than you normally would in restaurants, a salad instead of a cupcake, a healthy shake rather than milkshake, exercising more, covering yourself with layers when you go out together.

“Oh sweetheart,”

Matthew sat down next to you, he was about to reach a hand out to touch you but cowered back when he realised you most likely wouldn't like it.

“You know you're...you’re a lot like Spencer Reid even if he's only fictional,” this seemed to make you smile as you thought of the times you got to spend on set with your second family, “you give great advice, you’re smart in places others aren't, you ramble...but then again you're so different: you’re warm, inviting, open hearted, head full, eccentric, extravagant-”

“Well i wouldn't say extravagant-”

“Well I do,” you finally looked at Matthew; his face faltered when he saw how tear stained and red splotched you where. But god you were still the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

“I know i'm probably a troll by now-”

“No, no no baby; never,” Matthew raised his hands and cupped your jaw to keep you looking at him, “you’re always the most beautiful thing i ever had the pleasure of meeting,” you wanted to smile, and you did, but that was only your face.

“Yeah? Then what about the rest of me-”

“Dont” Matthew was quick to cut you off, “you are beautiful, all of you is beautiful,”

“But I've got, I've got rolls! A-and marks! Hair! I-i smell, I'm flabby, I jiggle…”

“I have rolls too and you love them,” your eyes darted to Spencers stomach where you knew his soft rolls where, “i have marks,” your eyes traveled to his hips were you knew some stretch marks looked like bolts of lightning from Zeus and Thor themselves, “i have hair,” you probably shouldn't have but you looked to his pant-covered crotch where you knew there was a recently trimmed patch of dark hair, “i smell,” you giggled at this as you both did kind of smell due to the day out in the hot movie theater, “im flabby and i jiggle,” he wasn't wrong, his arms sometimes jiggled when you moved them the same as his tummy whenever he danced weirdly.

“But youre skinny-”

“No buts,”

“I eat too much”

“So do I”

“You don't gain weight from it”

“Because i couldn't swallow for 26 days and have a fast metabolism”

“You have cheekbones”

“So do you”

“You cant see mine”

“I was a model; I had to bite the inside of my cheeks”

“Chiseled jaw,”

“Jaw exercises because i was a model; plus eating you o-”

“OKAY SHUSH,” you waved Matthew off with a laugh before standing up quickly.

“Can we please just go to bed? I just want this day to end,” you asked as your hands unconsciously covered your naked stomach; Matthew only now realised you had stripped from your dress before he came into the room. The look in his eyes when he scanned you from top to bottom included a range of emotions, from love and lust, to anger; anger being that you couldn't see what he sees and saw every day of his life.

“Can you at least let me show you how amazing your body is? And how much I adore you, your body and your mind?” a red flush went over your whole body as you realised what he was asking. Of course he asked. Consent is sexy.

That’s when it all fell into place; as soon as you nodded Matthew was all over you.

The plush bed moved under you as Matthew guided you down to the pillows and left feather-like kisses along your neck while muttering praises under his breath.

“Beautiful”

“Goddess”

“Princess”

“Elegant”

“One of a kind”

“Plush”

“Perfect”

“Impenetrable”

“Lovely”

“Divine”

“Angelic”

“Captivating”

“Foxy”

Each kiss left a word, each word left a purple bruise, each bruise lit a fire inside you you never knew you had. Nibbles trailed from your neck to your panty line before dispersing around your stomach in red and splotchy hickies and bites. Matthews hands went under you to unclasp your bra before leaving it somewhere on the bed or the floor; you couldn't really care less. His rough hands were the first to touch you and play with your nipples before his tongue, mouth and teeth followed; nipping and biting your nipples, pulling them slightly, twisting and licking. It felt like a dream.

“Sh-shit Matthew,” you let out a breathy whine while your body twitched under Matthews hands and mouth, one hand went down to your waist to hold you still while the other stayed playing with the plush flesh.

“Always loved these,” Matthew mumbled into your breast, he took a moment to plunge his face in your cleavage causing you to laugh, “just gimme a sec lovely,” Matthews voice came out muffled as he sat still; your arms coming up to play with his hair. His hands gripped both of your breasts softly before pushing them into the sides of his face, again, causing you to laugh.

“Is this your way of showing me how much you love me?” you questioned, Matthew stayed silent before a nod came from him, again, causing you to laugh harder before the man brought his face back to the real world with a harsh intake of breath.

“Couldn't breath,” Matthew said breathlessly, obviously. You both laughed for a moment before Matthew dove in for a kiss; heated, breathless, full of love and admiration for you. It honestly caught you off guard and made you forget what all of this was really for; until Matthews hands started pawing at your stomach.

“Gube-”

“Please”

And suddenly you were brought back to this morning; except this was different.

Please let me.

Please let me love you.

Please let me show you how amazing you are.

Please let me show you how beautiful you are.

Please let me show you how perfect you are.

Please allow me to be with you.

Please let me hold you.

Please.

And that was all it took.

“Okay,” you smiled a teary smile, as Matthew kissed your cheek and then trailed down to your stomach, peppering kisses, nibbles and licks all over your tummy.

“I love your stomach,” Matthew mumbled, “it holds your intestines together, it holds your food in, it keeps you together,” his nibbles soon went lower; leaving marks on the apex of your thighs as well as your inner thighs.

“Babe please…” your fingers threaded through Matthews hair as you tried to guide him to the place you really wanted but he stayed at your thighs.

“Darling just let me love you,” Matthew requested.

“Love me between my legs Gube” you whined while tugging at the mop on Matthews head until finally, finally! Matthew started to pull down your underwear before spreading your legs and...staring, “Gube…” you started to feel uncomfortable and closed your legs.

“Sunshine im sorry,” Matthew finally looked to you rather than your sex, “you’re just beautiful everywhere,”

“I know, i just haven't shaved and-”

“No, stop,” Matthew kissed your panty line, “this is about loving all of you; when have I ever cared if you’ve shaved or not?” the man gave you an unanswerable question, “answer me baby,”

“Never…”

“Never. Exactly,” he smiled before crawling back up to you and kissing your nose for a moment before going back down and licking a stripe up your slit causing you to moan from the suddenness, “god and you taste perfect,”

“Please don't say I taste like strawberry or something,” you giggled, Matthew laughed softly before shaking his head with his tongue on your clit; giving you pleasure while saying ‘no’. You tugged on his hair some more while the pleasure lasted. Matthew swiftly tore off his pants, boxers and shirt before lifting your legs and positioning himself at your entrance.

“You ready sweetheart?” Matthew mumbled, his hair was tousled with sex hair, his eyes bore into you with love, he was breathing heavily, a slight sheen of sweat was on his forehead he was like-

“A god,” you mumbled, hands finding Matthews cheeks and holding him softly.

“What…?”

“You’re like an actual god,” you spoke again, your voice was quiet as your eyes started to tear up.

“Oh darling,” Matthew mumbled, his hands coming up to wipe the tears away, “then you’re my goddess,” you nodded before bringing Matthew down for a kiss the same time he entered you; a low moan rumbling from the both of you as Matthew stilled, “you feel so good around me darling; wet and tight,” that's when he started thrusting; it felt like nothing you’d dot together before.

“H-holy shit,” your moans mixed together as Matthew held you tightly, his head buried itself in your neck and started sucking on the skin he could make contact with as his thrusts sped up; your legs encased Matthew as he hit that perfect spot in you.

“God you’re so beautiful,” Matthew mumbled softly through laboured breaths, “you’re so amazing; always there for me, helping me with everything, being perfect,”

“I love you so much,” you whimpered, Matthews hand snaked down between your thighs and started rubbing your clit expertly like he always did causing your moans to become louder as well as your approaching orgasm.

“I love you so much too doll,” Matthew whispered, “you gonna come sweetheart?”, you nodded while a large moan escaped you, “you’re beautiful in every way,” you nodded as your hips met Matthews; eyes scrunched and brows knitted you placed your forehead on Matthews as his hands encased your hips and sped up yet again. You’re sure bruises would be forming on your hips later tonight but that just made everything better; it just made you want to love yourself even more with every bruise, bump, lump, mark, scratch and roll. The image of Matthew kissing every inch of your body was what set you off. A silent moan left you as your mouth formed an ‘o’ and your tongue went dry due to the intakes of breath, you keened as Matthew thrusted for a first, second, third time and came with you. The warmth spread through you as Matthew held you close; encasing you with his arms as your legs wrapped around him.

It took a moment for the two of you to come back down to earth, but when you did it felt like everything was new. Matthew flopped beside you breathing heavily as a smile grew on both of your faces, a few moments passed before the lanky man himself stood up and walked to the bathroom before coming back with a washcloth and cleaning you up.

“Thank you,” you mumbled as Matthew finally cozzied back up to you under the covers, bringing you into his chest and kissing the top of your head.

“Anything for you,”

“Yeah? Anything?”

“Yeah,” Matthew looked at you with a smile, “anything,” and it was a promise.

[whiterbone-a]

i wanna know what your take on the nanami / gojo relationship is ?? cause a big part of me is like nanami isn't someone who really talks , like you won't get inside of him and he'll make jokes here and there with the whole work is shit thing . but i think he lost his heart and happiness alongside yuu and i think he even said this wasn't a mission first years should be on and the fact that yuu looked up to getou and gojo so much and still got killed was like a fucking blade to the stomach.

i mean do you think there is a romantic possability , i do play around with it but at the same time do you think it would be comforting ?? like i know the big ship is gojo and getou because of how close they were but what is nanami to gojo , a tool and a function or a friend and possible lover ??? and how will his death effect him ???

also were gojo actively smiles , nanami only smiles when death is around the corner and i am like red flags here and there . but sorry this got so long and please feel free to ignore it .

hello and welcome.  take a seat and thank you for joining me.  if this doesnt make sense just pretend u know what im talking about, its the adhd for making my thoughts so scattered everywhere

so in concept the nanami and gojou ship in a romantic concept is rly cute in concept like u have an ex - salary man whos serious doesnt allow himself the luxury of acting his age but on the other end u have someone who still acts like hes a child and never takes anything serious even when hes fighting.  they both endured the trauma being a jujutsu sorcerer entails yet they have nothing in common -- gojou dresses like hes a reflection with the moon and nanami, the sun.  also the fact that gojou thinks that he, himself, is ascended above all he works with while nanami is just a human living his day to day, and lot of ppl use this as nanami to bring down gojou to his morality just like a nudge or a friendly reminder.  he even tolerates and puts up with him a lot more than he should.  hes very patient but very honest.  a lot of the fanart of them is SO CUTE esp when theyre married and living happily with one another.  i even ship them, its actually one of my top ships next to satosugu but like in reality its not so great unfortunately

honestly?  theres a small slim of a possibility but due to the nature of the clash of personalities and what their job its like ... not rly possible

nanami, even out of being a salary man, fully treats being a jujutsu sorcerer as a 9 - 5 job and refuses to work overtime. he has small luxuries like he enjoys reading and eating left overs after a day of working hard like who wouldnt and not to mention hes the type to keep his relationships strictly professional. gojou has probably asked him several times to take him out for drinks after work (altho work never ends with gojou which is ironic) and has said no.  it’s funny now that i think about it,  shouko probably asks him for an occasional drink after hours and he accepts because at least he likes shouko and he knows theres no ulterior motive from her just a couple of coworkers doing some heavy drinking but nothing ever more than that -- hes even said that he wants to get married but when hes no longer a sorcerer

sucks tho, because like everyone else, nanami sees gojou as someone who is extremely powerful and only sees him for his techniques except more like hes a nuisance and extremely annoying, even to the point of having absolutely no respect for him.  he realizes, yeah hes strong but as for the full package that is satoru gojou?  there’s absolutely nothing to respect about that man

and while we’re talking about gojou, i’ll say it, he’s mentally unstable.  i mean, we all knew that -- hes got a couple of “screws loose” as he puts it inside that rattling brain of his.  on the opposite side of the spectrum, hes not capable of handling a romantic relationship.  hes always always busy, its rare that that he gets a breather for himself.  hes always being sent out on missions out of country and ive always portrayed gojou as the type of partner thats not even gentle on his partners in terms of being playful, childish, and being a nuisance.  his mental health is absolutely terrible (i’m not saying nanamis is any better but) hes always acted much younger than what he is altho i do blame his upbringing for that.

and gojou treats everyone as good friends but does like to particularly pick on ppl who take themselves too seriously (nanami and utahime), mei mei and yuki are exempt from this.  he also doesnt rly care for ichiji but like, that doesnt matter LOL.

i do see nanami eventually giving in for one (1) after dinner ‘date’ after work but when gojou is actually less himself, hes tolerable to be around which isnt saying much tbh.  you should def listen to the nanami and gojou drama audio if u can!  they’re so fucking funny as a pair, which solidifies them as being cute but were not talking about that rn.

in terms of being ‘what are they’ to each other, its hard to tell.  i talked about it briefly as nanami reminding him of his morality and being his humility tho gojou doesnt act like it, he fully believes hes above all and everyone, lovers and close friends are included in this.  i read a lot of nana/go fanfics and they portray nanami as someone to push down his ego;  to remind him hes actually Not all that great, a child in an adults body, etc.  he’s a brutality honest man and gojou can take critic and criticisms to his person but that doesnt mean hes going to listen (and he doesnt, hes even self aware that his personality sucks ass but does he bother to change?  absolutely not and he wont start now nor for anyone else).

yuu did definitely help nanami change and shift his ideas about the world, esp hating the jujutsu society afterwards.  like, i dont blame u king, it sucks ass.  tho, i dont think nanami looked up or cared for gojou and getou that much.  getou he looked up to more so because at least hes as a respectable guy, strong, good looking, and stimulates intellectual conversations.  gojou?  not so much.  nanami probably thought that it doesnt matter if u have techniques that is extremely rare to acquire and even more so to master but u suck ass and u dont stimulate joy to be around.

nanami is a good friend and high school buddy to gojou and nanami would definitely call him ‘coworker’ or something along those lines when hes annoyed him too much or doesnt want gojou to benefit too much from simple acknowledgement.  gojou thinks hes an ascended being but he definitely respects and finds nanami to be a strong sorcerer and was rather surprised when he took the 9 - 5 job but it was definitely safer.

death ... ah, i think about this all the time.  it’s like losing suguru all again except he didnt go rogue and kill a whole village.  hes absolutely confident in nanamis abilities to fend off curses and hes too stubborn to let himself die as well, so the idea of him dying doesnt ever cross his mind.  thats a true stab to the gut to hear that nanami has died, maybe a moment of truly being unhinged and a darker nature but we wont rly know until it happens in the manga, which i cant wait.  i mean, at least mei mei, utahime, and shouko are around but this is nanami were talking about.  if this was in terms of a romantic relationship rather than a simple seemingly one - sided friendship of enjoying of being around that person but that person just tolerating him and hoping he goes away eventually.  i can’t say, i can’t say!  just take these thoughts with like a grain of salt.

also that last statement in the ask, gojous smiles are fake and a mask while the rare times nanami does smile, its genuine.

regardless of what i said, i think it can be a comfy ship!  this ship isnt toxic but any means (unless u make it toxic then well, thats a you thing) so just enjoy it!  i know i do i think as long as u recognize that maybe neither of them being a relationship would benefit the other then go stupid go crazy, i know i will.

[beizhuo]

alright folks , i made this post last night about amending my carrd rules . & now , after calming somewhat down from getting sick to my stomach about it , i must now make one final update post about this to make people really & fully understand where i stand . why ? because i am , once again , having / needing to finely comb through the people i want to follow & interact with due to some very , VERY toxic behavior & terrible , childish individuals that think its real cute to stalk , harrass , steal , & gatekeep folks . 

understand that i will NOT be namedropping anybody in this post . this is not my intention . i am not out here to isolate folks or make people ‘ chose sides ’ . making people do that is absolutely horrible ! i do not give a damn who other people interact with . i do , however have extreme issues with theft ( amongst other things ) . i can draw a god damn line at theft ! 

harassment ? don’t care . you’re trolling , i can ignore you . gatekeeping . you’e petty and attention seeking im here for friends anyway . but actual literal theft - i can draw a line there . please get out & OFF MY BLOG if you are so unoriginal that you haveta steal from me or my friends !

please know that you can interact with those thieves & gatekeepers , i don’t care ! but understand that i will most likely softblock you because i genuinely do not want them to find me . no hard feelings . ( they have found my other 2 blogs , and i am tired of them finding me ! especially for baizhu ! i don’t even follow some of my friends here cause of this ! ) i am not even in the genshin community to begin with . my group ? we don’t do communities for toxic behavior and people being so exclusive to the point of driving people out & away . its distasteful and mean ! do you know that i have some friends that were cut off from communities entirely all because they were a dupe ? tHAT is the kind of dupe drama i fucking hate . along with theft . anyway . i will start from the beginning of my rules that i deem important .

DUPLICATES . ( AND MIMICRY / THEFT )

the irony that this is the first point . it is like it was a wonderful transition . anyway . this is actually having to deal with two rule points . and i want to group them together cause they are related .

myself & a few other people have come to find out that .... there is somebody AT THE VERY LEAST taking inspo from us . i will start with dupes .

my friend has a character and was WHOLLY mistaken for another mun . which is fine . that happens , but things took a turn for the worse when they were then shunned / cut off because they werent ‘ good enough ’ . do you know how HORRIBLE that is ? to be told that you aren’t good because you weren’t the mun that they wanted ? this is the type of shit i cannot stand with dupe drama . DO NOT EVER COMPARE DUPES WITH ONE ANOTHER !!! i mean it . 

i follow different childes ! and you know what i adore them both . they are both amazing ! 

sure i may have my mains / exclusives ( and im not inclined to interact with other blogs of that same character ) but i still like portrayals . i do , in fact , just READ threads sometimes . i don’t necessarily follow for interactions . like ffs man . i like variety . jesus christ .

going to mimicry / theft . you know ... i have fucking seen this with a couple of friends . there is a difference between coincidental similarities , however ! for myself & for my friends , we have SEEN inspo taken from us . im gonna say this really loud for people .

MIMICRY IS NOT FUCKING FLATTERY . 

do not take inspo from me . especially without credit . absolutely do NOT do it . you are very unoriginal for doing that shit . 

now , you like something i make / made ? you are inspired to want to make something ? fine , that’s okay , you can ALSO fucking ask me , you can also credit me . as you fucking should ! you can notify me and go , damn , i really like your style , do you mind if i use it in xyz ? sure , go right ahead . do it . im begging you , go ahead and do it IF YOU FUCKING ASK ME . god im so fucking angry about this , but this is some vile shit . and im angry .

i am angry and terrified cause i literally cannot get away from these people cause they seem to be wherever i go . i DO NOT DO COMMUNITIES BECAUSE OF THIS .

as a good friend said : it’s like they are a virus that you cannot get rid of .

thats what happens with attention seekers unfortunately , but for the sake of my safety & health , i will not have it on my blog or dash . if i see these people on my dash often , i will unfollow .

and it isn’t like a specific person , its a GROUP of people . which leads me to my next point .

DRAMA / CALLOUTS.

imagine having beef with an individual , and then going around and gatekeeping that individual and getting people to unfollow / block them . im not talking about , ‘ hey this person is vile because they ship incest ’ . i am talking about ‘ i had a disagreement with this person & they hurt my feelings >:/ they are mean and will hurt you . etc etc etc . ’ 

i do not give a flying fuck about somebodies issues with another person . so you guys don’t get along . not my problem . i have people that hate me . i have friends where i hate their friends . shit happens . i am probably absolute scum to some people lol . i get mistaken for other people sometimes . it’s fine , hate me cause you think im that person . that person is snowflake repellent anyway , go choke on your kool aide that you are drinking ig . 

okay sorry i am angry but still . people claim and cry about wanting to talk & communicate . but then . guess what . sometimes shitty people are like , so this person said this to me , and they are mean . IF YOU ARE THE PERSON THAT GOES ‘ OH MY GOD HOW DARE THEY ’ AND BLOCK THEM THEN YOU ARE THE PROBLEM . i will give an example . of using my two names that i have .

somebody goes to amphy and says ‘omg ghost said this , and im frustrated and angry with them cause what he said was uncalled for . ’ if amphy goes ‘ omg ghost is shitty ’ and then unfollows / blocks them without any other discussion , then thats an issue cause ghost has no idea wtf happen . amphy got involved in YOUR relationship with ghost even though ghost has been nothing but kind and sweet to you . you also don’t know if amphy is just victimising or being emotional either . so why they fuck would you believe somebody who is venting to you about it and then block somebody who did literally NOTHING to you .

i dont know if i explained that correctly but i will give you something more realistic , again without namedropping .

i have a few friends that hate one another . i’ve known all of them for years . but they all , i kid you not , they ALL fucking hate each other . there’s three of them . and they cannot stand each other . i just happen to be somebody who gets along with all of them . you bet your ass that at one point , they all came to talk mad shit about the others . what did i do ? i went , oh okay . well im sorry that you have issues with them . sounds like a bad experience , but i can’t do anything about that cause i am not you and i am not them . if you are gonna change my mind , it isn’t gonna happen , sorry !

i have had people shit talk people i have no idea who they are , and i just sit here just being a source for them to vent , but i never NEVER EVER act on anything i hear . why ? cause its petty drama and gossip . if you do that , then damn , sorry kiddo , get some help on that alright ? maybe be nicer . i dunno .

now . racism ? pedophilia ? incest ? HARMFUL SHIT ? that’s different . but again , theres a lot of miscommunication . i have people coming and pulling the cards like they are hot shit  and that isn’t fucking cute . THAT ISN’T CUTE GUYS . you are the problem if you try to victimize yourself cause of something YOU misinterpreted .

i have a friend that has this on their blog .

i am literally going off on a god damn tangent . anyway . :) 

fuck you if drink kool aide .

THERE ARE OTHER MENTAL DISORDERS! YOU ARE ABLEIST IS YOU ERASE THE OTHER (UN)COMMON ONES.

i know that autism is the ‘common’ one here . you are valid okay . but guess what . ADHD , BPD, DiD, and straight up depression and anxiety are also things as well ! there are MANY folks here that are also undiagnosed as well OR they lay on some sort of spectrum as well . I am once again not going to disclose my own things here cause again THAT IS PRIVATE INFO , but fuck you if you refuse to see other disabilities .

also there are physical disabilities as well btw .

if you are not understanding of any other disability , or you wanna mute / deafen other mental disorders , YOU ARE THE FUCKING PROBLEM .

end of story . 

treat other people how you want them to treat you and don’t you dare ever shove your baggage at them . thanks . 

please be more understanding that some people are not okay:tm: . 

i implore you to get help if you need help , but sometimes some people dont have to take your shit . and they most certainly do not need to sit and take your issues if they are not okay either . its toxic and very unhealthy behavior to expect others to help you . they can help you as best as they can , but you need to understand that everybody has their moments . do not guilttrip them . do not gaslight them . 

but also understand that sometimes , people are saying things cause they genuinely need help ! you can be there for them but as a friend , you need to also tell them your own boundaries as well and tell them that they need to seek professional help .

but also , if somebody refuses to get help , then that is on them . not on you . 

anyway another tangent , but back to the point . autism , while you need to understand is something you need to see and understand , is not the only mental disorder ! and you need to understand that some people suffer from really REALLY shitty things and are sometimes undiagnosed . i am really REALLY tired of depression , ADHD , BPD, and DiD getting brushed under the rug like they are not important . cause guess what , there are spectrums ! all mental health is important . fuck you if you disregard the other disorders , you are being ableist .

STOP HATE READING PEOPLE.

im really sick and tired of this . you don’t like something somebody said ? you can either : ask what they meant or block / unfollow them . 

DO NOT FUCKING STALK THEM EITHER . 

you have an obsession if you hover on their blog too .. do not do that . that is SO unhealthy for you . here is what a friend said on twitter . ( not name dropping them , just copy pasting them )

❛ i stg people need to fine a better hobby than to hate read a persons blog or profile. not a good look on you when you go and read what they post about just to get angry at something you think they said and then you go off spewing lies about it cause 'youre offended.'  

like you already hate them in the first place. you weren’t 'looking to see if they were a better person.' youre just looking to find another thing to hate about them. 

that is what hate reading is about. so you can read their posts and find just another reason to hate and laugh at how bad you think they are.

but it doesnt make you a better person. it just makes you a sad person with no life. stop hate reading people. grow tf up. go breathe on some plants or something idk.

i say this very loud and clear . if you hate read me , i live in your head rent free . not my problem . but it does become my problem if you begin to steal shit and start spewing lies about myself or my friends . grow up and move on with your life . sorry my life seems more interesting than you ig . idk .

anway this got long , and at this point i am going off on a tangent but !!!!

TL ; DR

read my rules ig . idk .

you can dm me for more info if you want . at this point i have blocked the problem blogs for myself. if you are curious you can ask . HOWEVER. i am not going to tell you to block or unfollow . why ? cause at the end of the day , it is MY beef . this are my issues . i am NOT here to gatekeep .

i will say that i will tell you IN private the for MY story . but keep in mind that it is MY story . not yours . not theirs . it is all about perception .

my perception is that they are scummy gatekeeping thieves . they gatekeep the people they dont like or are intimidated by . i am somebody who fucking bites and calls people out on their shit , because of this ? i make enemies . but my enemies are not yours . i dont care .  dont give a damn . i am intimidating to people who are cowards and i don’t care . 

if they feel bad when i call them out , if they try to go around and do damage control , then that means they are guilty .

and then you can ask yourself this : why are they reacting like that ?

i am once again going to bring up that other twitter user that i quoted before .

❛  you dont like hearing that because someone is holding a mirror up to you and it makes you uncomfortable because you know you . and you know the parts of you that are good . so in your heart you have to come up with a narrative that makes you feel better about the fact that somebody is asking your to confront the parts about yourself that you hate the most .

anyway . this got long . im so sorry for the long read . im so sorry i sounded hostile ad angry . im just volatile sometimes . im just really tired . and i dont need to come on this blog and have a panic attack . 

anyway . cheers loves ! stay happy , stay healthy . drink your fluids . take your meds !