#on the one hand I think she’s fucking insufferable and sometimes it’s really annoying to play as her

[kainebell]

I generally don’t have strong feelings about RWB (it’s ok I guess??) but this is still the funniest shit ever lmao. Need more botched pathetic loser girl love confessions in choices

[saturnniidae]

More dragon rider disability headcanons for disability pride month!

(Ones specifically abt Hiccup are here)

Ruffnut has hypermobile EDS (when the twins were doing some bit that was basically Guinness book of world records she said smth abt 'worlds stretchiest skin' and my mom made a joke and said 'ruff has eds!' And it stuck)

A joke Ruffnut loves to make is saying Tuff is so insufferable she should just run away to join a circus and become a contortionist. She thinks it's the funniest thing ever

Hiccup also has some weird hypermobility stuff going on, when Ruff learns this she calls him a fellow circus freak (affectionate) and offers to let him come with her when she runs away. The response she got was "I'd rather stick my hand in Fenrir's mouth."

Tuff is visually impaired in his right eye from a childhood injury (another joke taken seriously)

All the riders are neurodivergent!

Snotlout has a frequently irregular heartbeat as well as memory issues due to how many times he's been struck by lightning. His whole book he wrote in that one episode isn't the only writing he does, he keeps a notebook to help keep track of minor things he might forget.

Astrid tries to make Hiccup breakfast in bed when he's having bad pain days and is too tired to do it himself. She almost burns the house down every time, so Toothless will go and get the other riders to help out while Astrid is kicked out of the kitchen and sent back to bed

Hiccup can be really fucking mean sometimes! Usually it's intentional bc he's in a bad mood and wants to be left alone. If it's seemingly unprovoked though, the others know it as a sign he's likely in pain and needs to be left alone (he still insists on getting work done but usually Toothless annoys him into resting)

Astrid has aches in her leg from when she got shot with that arrow, it being poisoned with dragon root did something to mess up the healing process so its worse than other old injuries (Dragon root isn't poisonous to humans but still having it in your blood stream isn't a good idea). She's also very mean when she's in pain, especially because it ruins her schedule since she can't train. Eventually her and Hiccup come to an agreement when they're having bad pain days they'll meet up in one of their huts and just. Sit together enjoying the others comforting presence but rarely talking

This is because Hiccup and Astrid both hate being in pain in front of people, they both share that almost extreme fear of vulnerability and the best they can do is take comfort in each other

Hiccup and Fishlegs are hyperfixation buddies! Fishlegs is the only one who doesn't get mad (it's just fond exasperation) when Hiccup wakes him up in the middle of the night to infodump, they just bounce off each other talking about dragons until woah suddenly the sun is rising and that is when Fishlegs gets upset because he values his sleep

All the riders have burn scars of varying severity. They literally work with dragons there's no way they wouldn't. And they all deal with their pain in different ways, but are unwavering supportive of each other when they can be

I've said it before and I'll say it again, a lot of characters should be disabled.

I know, cartoon logic and all, but the things that happen to these guys are things that should affect them for the rest of their lives. And watching characters struggle with permanent change like that, the realization you can never go back to how things were, and eventually healing and learning that's okay! You can still find happiness and be happy and it doesn't make your pain any less valid! It's so important to me and that's obviously reflected in my interpretations of my favorite characters lmao

[bucknastysbabe]

imagine how insufferable criston would be if his so was pregnant. she cant do anything. and he would be like maybe we should get married and she would be like why??? and he would be like we are having a baby and she would be like i dont think we should get married just bc we are having a baby??? and he would cry for a week. i like when pretty men suffer

On god he would be so annoying but also I’m just having thots about it and they’ve been multiplying in my head like bacteria. ✨Pretty men suffering✨

First of all he’s even more possessive bc not only you’re his but you’re carrying his baby

Like gotdamn can’t even walk down the street without Criston putting his arm around you or having a hand on the small of your back and could HE STOP KISSING YOUR CHEEK WE GET IT

So then comes the whining about getting married. He simply doesn’t get coexisting without a ring and you taking his last name. Criston def gets teary when you’re like no???? Like y’all already live together, sleep in the same bed, and you’re literally having criss priss baby

“I don’t understand, don’t you want a big ring, a dress? We never got a honeymoon.” You have to remind him that honeymoon ain’t happening when there’s a baby to be taken care of!!

He’s def audibly sighing and huffing when he’s denied, again. Probably sobs in the shower bc the delusions are being CRUSHED

You think he’s kinda cute with red eyes and nose, his lips swollen. So Criston can get a pity blowie but first he has to be a mother hen and make sure you have a pillow on your knees and are comfy. He’s adorable when he whines and trembles from your mouth.

Sometimes you have to slap him a little when he’s following you around the house just MaKiNg SuRe you’re okay. Literally you just want a bagel.

As you move along in the pregnancy babes gets A Little Feral. I lied he’s insatiable. The man loves your curves and baby weight, not to mention how big your tits are getting. God forbid you’re just standing around doing something because if Criston is around he’s coming up from behind, making a comment about how pretty you are all bred up with his baby.

That also means constant groping— he can’t keep his hands off of you. Especially when Criston’s fucking you on all fours, hand possessively splayed across your rounded belly. He’s practically growling, “Look so fucking good for me, bred you up good didn’t I? When you pop out our baby m’gonna put a ring on your finger and fuck another one in you.” Which you cum quite dramatically at that, his sheer desperation is hot, and his cock is nice. Criston’s a sexy man. Delusional, but sexy.

The marriage talk is brought up again…post-coital bliss? Not in that house. Criston’s pouting, face shoved into your tits. He grumbles, “You’ll get it sooner or later. I’m going to marry you.”

“Yep baby, alright.” *cue more shower crying*

Also he’s ecstatic whether it’s a boy or girl like he’s just happy to be daddy cole🥰

Oh god when your milk comes in Criston is your personal fucking pump. He doesn’t think it’s funny when you ask him if he really likes milking cows this much. Your man is dead serious, “You’re not a cow. You’re perfect and pregnant and a goddess.” Okay go off king

But fr the fucking ramps up to a 10 in the third trimester that man is HORNY!!!!! He got in some trouble with you just mindlessly grabbing your ass at the grocery store. Dumbass had to walk around with a boner in the Walmart baby section

The day you go into labor he’s in full action mode. A true king. Look at him in he scrubs. He’s probably ugly sobbing when you’re holding the babe for the first time. It’s okay though you’re ugly sobbing too. Then the baby is ugly sobbing. Happily ever after😌

No you’re still not marrying his dumbass either

[drpoisonoaky]

So here’s the thing, everyone in the Gaang assumed that Azula was the older sibling.

…

And they love her eyeliner.

— — — Sokka

Sokka: WAIT WHAT

Azula: Ugh, why are you yelling at me?

Sokka: YOU ARE THE YOUNG SIBLING

Azula: Yes? Why you ask?

Zuko: He was complaining about Katara. And then he said “Ugh but you wouldn’t get it cause Azula is the oldest”.

Azula: And you get it?

Zuko: Not really.

Sokka: IT’S IMPOSSIBLE.

Azula: It’s cause I’m better at everything.

Zuko: It’s the makeup and how insufferable you are.

Sokka: IT’S EVERYTHING.

Sokka: How she looks, talks, thinks…you have to be messing with me.

Azula: I honestly don’t know if I should feel flattered or insulted.

Zuko: She’s the same age as Katara.

Sokka: NO WAY.

— — — Aang

Aang: So tell me how was Zuko when he was a baby? I’m curious.

Azula: I don’t now. I’m guess he cried a lot.

Aang: Oh you don’t remember?

Azula: I wasn’t alive avatar.

Aang: Hold on, are you the younger sibling?

Azula: I am.

Aang: But you look older, and know more about history and stuff. Plus all of that trauma and emoti-

Azula, slightly annoyed: Yes Aang I get it.

Aang: It doesn’t make sense.

Azula: It’s simple: makeup and discipline.

Aang:

Azula: What?

Aang: I have some meetings this week could you help me to look older so they will pay me more attention?

Azula:

Aang: Please. For the sake of the world?

Azula: Sure I’ll show you.

— — — Toph

Toph, seeing how Katara and Sokka are arguing: Men sometimes I’m glad I’m an only child.

Azula: I almost was once. Zuko wasn’t happy about it.

Azula: But I must say, having an older brother who looks after you feels nice. But if you tell anyone I said this I’ll commit arson.

Toph: WHAT?!

Azula: I mean Zuzu and I fought a lot.

Toph: Not that. No way he’s the big bro.

Azula:

Azula: I’m actually curious about why you didn’t know it cause it’s impossible that it could be for the makeup.

Toph: You were a fucking pro master firebender back then and Zuko wasn’t.

Azula: Did you know that my flames are blue?

Toph: No way. Why nobody tells me this things. Anything else cool?

Azula: I can make lighting balls in both of my hands and I can make a perfect eyeliner in 30 seconds.

Toph: Can you do it now?

Azula: Which one?

Toph: Both but bring someone else cause when I ask if it looks good on me I need to know the truth and I still can’t fucking tell if you’re lying or not.

Azula: Makes sense. Although I would never lie to you about that.

— — — Suki

Suki: I need you to teach them firebender’s forms even though they’re non-benders.

Azula: Easy. I used to do it with Ty lee.

Suki: But you have to treat them as your younger sisters. Like how you would treat Zuko if you like him.

Azula: What?

Suki: Kindness?

Azula: No. Do you think I am the older sibling?

Suki: You aren’t?

Azula: No.

Suki: Wait what?!

Azula: I’m the same age as Ty lee. I went to the royal fire academy with her.

Suki: Whao.

Suki: You did and plan all of that shit when you were 14?!

Azula: I don’t know what that tone means.

Suki: Did you have that huge breakdown at 14?

Azula: Now you are simply being rude.

Suki: I don’t believe you. TY LEE COME HERE.

Ty lee: What’s sup?

Suki: Is she the same age as you?

Ty lee, raising an eyebrow: Yes?

Ty lee, realizing: Oh you didn’t know she’s younger than Zuko. It’s the makeup ‘Zula. You look beautiful, but it makes you look older.

Suki: It can’t be.

Azula: Can’t you stop being rude? I look great.

Suki: Not that, asshole. You being younger than Zuko. It doesn’t makes sense…

Azula:

Suki:

Ty lee:

Suki:

Ty lee: I think you broke her? What were you doing before?

Azula: She was explaining to me who I was supposed to teach and how I have to treat them.

Suki: But how she fights…

Ty lee: Oh right, c’mon they’re waiting. They actually pretty nice. You have to be patient ‘Zula.

Azula: Ugh.

Suki: And she played with us…

Ty lee puppy eye’s version: For me please?

Azula: I hate you.

Suki: She conquered Ba Sing Se…

Ty lee: No you don’t. *kiss Azula’s cheek* Hurry up. Bye Suki!

Suki: She killed the avatar…

Suki: AND SHE WAS 14.

Azula, being dragged by Ty lee: Ty, I think you are right. I broke your boss.

Ty lee: I hope that means a vacation for at least a week.

— — — Katara

Katara: You are my age?!

Azula: Hello Azula. How are you Azula? You look great Azula.

Azula: That’s how you have to start a conversation. But yes I am. Why?

Katara: Everything we did.. We were the same age all the time?

Azula: That’s how time works.

Katara: I THOUGHT I WAS BEATING SOMEONE AT LEAST AS OLD AS MY BROTHER

Azula: Why are you yelling at me? Is it a family thing?

Katara: I thought I was so ahead of my age…

Azula: You are a master waterbender without almost any professional help, you heal people with your bending and help to end a 100 year war. Plus you defeated me once. What the fuck are you talking about?

Katara, blushing: Oh, that…that was actually so nice, thanks. I- I appreciate it.

Azula: Your welcome. Now if you excuse me I have things to do.

Katara: Wait.

Azula: What now?

Katara: Can you…?

Azula: I can do a lot of things.

Katara: Well your eyeliner…can you…?

Azula: *sighs* You’re the third person to ask. So I guess it’s your turn.

— — — Zuko

Azula: If someone else imply I’m the oldest sibling you will have to bring back the straightjacket.

Zuko: In my defense they didn’t ask they just assumed.

Azula: You know how many eyeliners I had to do today besides mine? Three. THREE.

Zuko: I think Sokka was going to ask you too, he was looking for you…

Azula: For Agni’s sake.

Azula: At least I hope you don’t want me to teach you too.

Zuko: Mai taught me a long time ago.

Azula: Thank Agni.

Zuko: But I must say I don’t get them. You clearly are my little sister.

Azula: Because I’m a much better version of you?

Zuko: No.

Zuko: Because you are a lot more insufferable and insane than I am.

Azula: If you don’t start running now I’m going to celebrate becoming an only child. Again.

Zuko: Sure buddy.

Azula: One, two-

Zuko: LALA DON’T YOU DARE. STOP THE SPARKING.

— — — Mai & Ty lee

Azula: FIVE five people’s makeup. And I don’t even like them.

Ty lee: Wait five? Suki too?

Azula: I’m counting mine. Adds more drama.

Mai: Such a drama queen.

Azula: But anyway I don’t deserve this.

Mai, raising an eyebrow: You sure?

Ty lee: Look at it as your little price to pay in your healing path. Plus every time you do an eyeliner your aura gets a little bit pinkier. So stop complaining.

Mai: Although I don’t see the big problem with the fact everyone thinks you’re older than Zuko.

Ty lee: True, why is bothering you so much?

Azula: I refuse to think Zuzu ages better than me.

Mai:

Ty lee:

Azula: Whatever. By the way I’m impressed with the little avatar’s fangirls. You were right Ty.

Ty lee: Of course. When am I not?

Mai: When you started to date her.

Azula, starting to sparkle:

Ty lee: And here we go again.

[goosetheluce]

you're my home (lucy gray baird x fem!reader)

info: cussing, ever so slight angst, mutual pining, confession, reader is running from district twelve with lucy gray

a/n: it's not weird to have a crush on someone with the first name as you !! taylor swift and taylor lautner did it leave me alone

»--•--«

you stirred from your rest at the bright sunbeams pouring through the trees. and maybe also lucy gray's insistent tugging and repetition of your name.

"holy shit," she grumbles, clearly dismayed. "wake up! we're almost there. gotta get moving."

" 'm up. lord."

you heaved a sigh and arched your back, a tight line of pops rushing down your spine. you took a deep inhale, eyes shutting again as you ran a hand along your fucked up, greasy hair.

traveling on foot for a week isn't the most flattering look.

when you peeled your eyes open, you were met with lucy gray's judging stare beating down on you. considering the way the corners of her lips twitched, though, you knew she couldn't stay annoyed at your heavy sleeping for too long.

"gimme a break, lucy gray. i'm not used to this," you rasped. you rolled out of your tent and lay dramatically on the forest floor. what's a little more dirt, anyway?

she scoffed and her radiance peeked through her exasperated face. the wide smile woke you up a little more.

"should've hung out with the covey more while we were still around the district," she scolds, grabbing your soft hands and wrapping them in hers to pull you to your feet. "might've taught you how to not be a baby."

"maybe. but i ran away with you, didn't i?" you retorted. "i think that makes me pretty grown."

lucy gray's playful smile faded into a more serene one. she simply gave a nod and stepped away, picking up her backpack.

"look what i found while you were asleep," she murmured. she pulled out eggs (poor mother bird), and a bundle of herbs for tea later. your mouth watered.

"no salt and pepper?" you teased, taking an egg and inspecting it. it was heavy. you were hit with homesickness as you remembered your kitchen, which sometimes struggled to stay stocked, but at least you had the chance for butter.

you both decided on soft-boiling the eggs in the tiny pot you begged lucy gray to pack before you ventured off. you sat and ate, peeling away the crackling shell and talking about the journey and whatever else before packing up and hiking through another day.

things were natural with her. hell, everything about her was natural. her beauty was untouched by the standards of the capitol and instead flourished freely. it was evident in the lively bounce of her dark waves and her sunkissed olive skin. you wondered when the last time was you looked in the mirror without picking everything apart, envying lucy gray's outward confidence.

"i still can't believe we're doing this," you spoke up, the silence becoming insufferable.

lucy gray turns her head to meet your eyes, her expression neutral. sweat pooled on her hairline and dripped down her temples. you knew if you reached out to touch her, her skin would be blazing with the power of the sun. good thing she doesn't burn.

"like, running away and all that. i thought i'd rot away in twelve for the rest of my life."

till i met you, you added on silently.

lucy gray laughed.

"a woman like you? naw, i had to steal you away. couldn't let such a beauty go to work in those damned mines."

"you really think i'm that much of a priss?" you sighed, batting your eyelashes at her sarcastically.

"oh, honey, i never said that. sometimes a girl just wants a treat for herself. so i got my treat."

you blamed the high noon for your feverish cheeks.

the minutes turned into hours, and the shadows stretched across the grass. laughter rang across the fields.

"your first kiss was billy taupe? he's so fucking boring, i'm sorry," you cackled, eyes shut tight from hysteria. "sadly for the rest of us, though...next to you, anyone is boring."

"what? first kisses aren't exactly known to be glamorous," lucy gray defended. "besides, i got the real deal after him."

"oh?" you perked up, voice stabilizing. "this mystery guy must be the reason your head was in the clouds...at least, according to maude."

suddenly, the happiness drained from her face. "for a while, i guess. wasn't worth it." you averted your eyes to the front of the scenery. your grip tightened around the straps of your backpack.

"you deserve better. you'll find someone. a hot guy from district four, maybe," you teased, nudging her arm with your elbow.

like me.

"oh, perfect, a fisher! don't even need to buy cologne for his birthday; it'd be useless against that rank," she remarks sourly.

you giggled as her teasing gaze met yours. your grin was mirrored, and you memorized the crevices of her smile lines. her eyes fluttered down to your lips for a brief moment before she cleared her throat and unraveled her map.

you let out a deep breath and looked around. you remembered when you first met lucy gray, frozen and terrified to see somebody else outside the limits of twelve. she eyed you warily from the lake, her lips parted and brow furrowed.

you realized you should probably say something to the girl in the lake, but you didn't know what. she waded toward you and began a less-than-friendly warning before you interrupted her.

"we don't have food. i'm just out here to gather some things."

the girl's voice halted and her shoulders reluctantly dropped from their defensive position.

"thank god."

"what are you doing in there? aren't you gonna get caught?" you inquired nervously, eyes flitting everywhere. the girl laughed brightly.

"those joke 'peacekeepers' don't care about anything that goes on past the fences. not even a covey girl swimming. scandalous, i know."

you stared as the sun washed over her soaked hair.

"lucy gray baird," she offered up her name. "but you can call me lucy gray. that's what all my friends call me."

"i'm..." you started, walking to the edge of the dock to meet her at the water.

she muttered something quietly, bringing you back to the present.

"what's that?"

"ah, just that we should stop here for the night. it's not a good idea to go through the forest in the dark. so easy to get lost," lucy gray corrects herself. you nodded and looked around for a spot.

"there looks good," you suggested, pointing to a spot under a lone cluster of trees. lucy gray hums in agreement before starting towards the spot, taking your hand in hers. your heart skipped.

the sky wept deep indigo, bleeding down into the horizon as the sun sank. insects chirped and buzzed, their calls flowing through the tree leaves and across the grassy plains. the fire was warm; the smell of roasted game and pungent tea carried away in the wind. lucy gray's wavy voice split the thick summer air pleasantly. your eyes stayed fixed on her. her dainty fingers held her tea. a sly smile painted her face.

"you stare a lot," she remarked. "you know that, right?"

your eyebrows raised a bit. you kept looking, wondering how she'd noticed and still hadn't even looked up to meet your gaze. until she did.

god, you loved the way her eyes looked like a cup of black coffee. the way your grandma used to make it. or maybe the tree bark you peeled away from a rotting trunk as a kid. the soil embedded between your fingers after a long day of work.

"i do know that," you responded a second too late. awkward delivery. you swallowed and looked into the towering coniferous forest. shadows crept from beneath the canopy and raised the hairs on the back of your neck.

"we should probably wrap it up soon," you insisted. "put out the fire, get to bed, all that." you picked at a scab till it flaked off.

lucy gray scoffed, setting her tea beside your backpacks.

"the sun is barely gone. just 'cause the birds are sleepin' don't mean we are."

you said nothing in return, still wary of the woods nearby. your fingers pressed firmly into the skin of your arms, which were rested on your knees. you sighed and put your head down.

you felt lucy gray's gaze burning into you. you felt the former scab swelling and the droplet of blood spilling down your arm.

"you messed with it too much. might get infected if we don't clean it," she asserted. you smiled with your head on your knees. lucy gray was making an excuse to touch you. you wondered silently if she felt the same intense heartrate, the same jolt of electricity every time your arms brushed as you hiked through the countryside.

away from all the rules.

you lifted your head and saw lucy gray hurrying back with a damp towel and honey. your brow furrowed.

"what's that for?"

she chuckled as she kneeled down to wipe away the blood and dirt with the towel.

"it'll keep that cut clean. antibacterial properties an' all. trust me."

your breath hitched as the towel made contact with your cut. the gentle sting of raw honey being spread across the wound is what snapped your drooping eyelids back open.

definitely not lucy gray's lips so close to you.

"...hey," she whispered.

"hi?" you responded, smiling a bit.

"it's alright if you're homesick. you can talk to me about it, if you'd like."

you breathed out a long sigh and pressed your forehead to hers. she hesitated before bringing her left hand to rest on the side of your face.

"lucy gray," you began, but struggled to finish. you pulled back slightly to make eye contact.

"i'm not that homesick. i have you," you whispered softly.

"you're my home."

you were met with a tense silence. you wanted to turn and run, because how could you be so stupid to tell her that, and you ruined the moment, and-

suddenly her lips are pressing gently into yours. your eyes widened. the taste of the tea she was drinking lingered on your tongue as she shuffled back.

"fuck! fuck, i'm sorry, i wasn't thinkin'," she apologized, voice shaking as she stared at you. she fiddled with her hands anxiously. you'd never seen her so flustered.

all you did was make your way back to her, cupping her face in a heavy kiss. you smiled against her, feeling her body relax into yours. her hands rested on top of yours before sliding comfortably onto your waist. she pulled back, jet black eyes bright with starlight and exhilaration.

"coming with you, getting away from twelve...it's been the best decision i ever made," you confessed, dropping your hands from her face and instead rubbing her arms. "i've wanted nothing except you for like, a year now."

"we've known each other for almost three years. i'm wounded," lucy gray teased, her fingers unsuccessfully smoothing the top layer of your hair.

"well, was i better than billy taupe?"

"quiet, you."

»--•--«

[tillthelandslide]

Insufferable Arsehole Part 4: Talk! - Matty Healy Series

A/n: warning this one is a bit long haha. Hope you like it anyway, let me know what you think

You can read the previous part here: Part 3 -Sex

Series Masterlist

Matty and Lou haven't spoken since everything happened, it had been about a week and a half since then. She can't deny she has found herself craving his touch, but his words had royally pissed her off and it would take more than a few lustful glances (which there were many) to get her to do anything with him again.

Lou and Ross are sat at the edge of today's stage, Ross' bass sits in her lap, they're sitting opposite each other. She has no clue how many shows they've played now or how many cities and counties they've been to. From where Matty stands at the side of the stage, he can only see Ross, who's hair is free from the usually restraint of a hairband, Lou's back is facing him, but the giggles and laughter she's letting out are getting on his nerves. He wants to be the one that's making her laugh like that.

She's playing the bass line to "Love Me", she plays it easily and Ross chuckles to himself, shaking his head.

"Is there anything you can't do?" he says and she smiles at this, blushing slightly.

"When did you learn that?" he asks, she passes his bass back to him and he rests it against his lap.

"A while ago... always liked the way it sounded, you play it better though" she smiles at him, her chin rests against her palm as she looks at him. They talk about how amazing the other was during the previous shows, Lou complimenting him tenfold on his harmony during "change of heart".

"We have to sing together sometime" she says and they shake on it.

An eyelash rests against his cheek and she leans forward, fingers gently removing it "eyelash" she explains.

"Make a wish" she says, Ross closes his eyes for a second before opening them back up, she smiles and lightly blows on the eyelash, they smile and watch as it floats somewhere unknown.

Matty knows at this point he's seen too much so he walks to where they're sitting on the stage.

"Well isn't this cosy. Have to admit, you two are cute. Be careful Ross, heard she's a bit of a bitch, think you can do better mate" he says and she has to really try not to just get up and slap him. She doesn't care if he's rude towards her, but directing it at one of his best friends is too far.

"Why do you have ruin everything" she says, sighing deeply, getting up from the stage and going to walk off. Ross sighs before walking off too, in the opposite direction, Matty quickly chases after her, grabbing her by the hand, halting her movements.

"Where are you running off to aye?" he asks harshly. She snatches her hand away from his before snapping at him.

"You have no right saying shit like that. Forget about me for a minute, I dont matter. But Ross? He is one of your best friends and you've been treating him like shit!" she says, her words ringing true although Matty didn't want to hear them.

"Sorry if it annoys me that you and him are cosying up all other the place" he says ignoring her words completely.

"So what!" she shouts, throwing her hands up almost in defeat "Ross is kind and he cares about me unlike you!" she shoves him before going to leave, she quickly turns around "you can't just fuck me and think that I owe you something, continue being a dick to me all you like, but I will not let you ruin your friendship with your best friend" she explains before finally leaving.

Matty knows she's right, he doesn't know what or if something is going on between Ross and her, but Ross actually deserves her. He knows that's why he's the way he is with her, because he wants her but knows she's the last thing he deserves.

Ross is good, and kind just like her, they're perfect for each other he thinks.

He doesn't see her for the rest of the day, he wants to check up on her, make sure she's okay but he's aware he's probably the last person she wants to see. Instead he finds Ross, he's sitting on a sofa backstage and he offers him a weak smile, one in which Matty didn't deserve. He deserves for Ross to tell him he was an arsehole and to fuck off, but that wasn't the type of person he was.

"Hey mate, look, I'm really sorry for being such an arse, whatever is going on I'm happy for you" he says. Ross shakes his head at this.

"There's nothing going on, we're just friends mate, that's the way its always been. We just get each other that's all" he says, Matty wants to believe him but doesn't quite. He goes to speak again, but Ross cuts in first.

"Look, whatever you feel about her, you can't keep doing this" he says, his words confusing the curly head man, his eyebrows furrow.

"Come on man, the both of you have always had this back and forth, its obvious you have feelings for her, just sort it out. I care about you both and right now, you're just hurting each other and making a mess of things" Ross says, his words hit Matty and he finds himself pulling his mate into a hug.

"Im confused man" he almost whispers, face tucked into Ross' shoulder.

"I know" he says, just hugging his friend tighter. The truth was, Matty had always been infatuated with her, she was the girl of his dreams and he felt like he never deserved her. He saw the way she was with his closest friends and he was jealous of them. So he coped the only way he knew how, by completely rejecting those feelings and replacing them with hate. He had a huge ego, but his self worth had always been far too low and recently had been plummeting even more.

"She's too good for me man, I don't deserve her - never have, that's why I act this way" he says, running his hands through his hair.

"Maybe if you treated her the way she deserves, the way, deep down, you want to treat her. You'll start thinking otherwise" Ross says and Matty just hugs him again.

"I get you're scared mate, I get it. But you've gotta try otherwise we might all loose her" Ross said and Matty knew it was true.

Matty wanted to tell her how amazing he thought she was, how talented and kind and genuinely good she was. But he had always been so scared she would reject him. But Ross was right, if he carried on being this way, she'd run away and they'd all lose her.

"What if it goes bad anyway? What if she rejects me and ends up feeling too awkward to hang out with you lot. I risk it either way" Matty explains, running his hand through his hair.

"And what if it's the best thing that ever happened to you?" Ross asks, Matty feels his world spin at his friends words, his heart picking up in his chest. Maybe he was scared of both of those scenarios.

He eventually finds her having a smoke, she's sat on the curb of a pavement, he can tell she had been crying and he cant count the amount of cigarette buts that were scattered around her.

"This seat taken love?" he asks, his tone quiet and gentle, he wanted to let her know he meant no harm.

"Go for it" she says, eyes not finding his, she can tell he's about to speak so she cuts him off quickly.

"Leave it Matty... its fine" she says, in the next minute he's turned her body so its facing him, his hands have found hers and are holding them gently. His eyes are unfalting from hers and his face is close to hers.

"No its not fine. It's really not fine. I am genuinely so sorry" he says and she just sighs.

"Just listen please" he begs and she nods.

"I know you don't believe me and I completely understand that, I haven't given you a single reason to. But I am so sorry. I've been a right cock and I'm making a mess of things. True Matty fashion" he says and she finds herself letting out a small chuckle at that. His fingers gently wipe at her cheek, removing the tears.

"I will show you how sorry I am, I swear. We can't lose you Lou..." he says, pausing, her eyes are focused on the ground, so he places her fingers under her chin, carefully pushing against it and making her look at him.

"I can't lose you" another confession that has her heart pounding, but it confuses her.

"I'm a twat. But I'm obsessed with you" he admits, "Always have been, just hated ya because it was easier than the alternative" he says, her eyebrows furrow.

"The alternative?" she says, her voice weak. He sighs deeply before rushing out his words, she hears every single one though.

"Telling you I liked you and you rejecting me because you're too good for me. You were- are this really cool girl, who is unbelievably kind and good. And everybody loves you and I got why but I hated it because I knew you wouldn't see me the way I wanted you too. I hated the fact that you got along so well with the guys, they got to have this part of you that I would never have, all because I'm this insufferable, arrogant, arsehole who treated you like shit" he is the one to stare at the ground now. She squeezes his hand gently and his eyes are back on hers.

"You're an idiot" she says, almost smiling. She leans forward and places a gentle kiss to his cheek.

"what was that for?" he asks, a small smile resting on his lips.

"For admitting that, I know it must have been hard. But you should know... maybe if you weren't such a dick, I wouldn't have had to reject you. You could've had me the way the guys did too, you just had to be nice" she says and he nods sadly.

"so you are rejecting me?"

"No... I'm just saying... I'm not rejecting you, I'm not doing anything... you need to prove what you're saying" she says and he nods harshly.

"I swear I'll prove it!" he says.

"Okay" she smiles at him.

"Can I kiss you?" he asks nicely and she smiles at the tone she's very rarely heard directing at her. She nods and he places a very light kiss to her lips, just his lips pressing softly against hers, an apology of sorts, or the start of one. He pulls away shortly after and she finds herself chasing his lips.

"We should get ready for the show" he says, his forehead rests against hers and their eyes are both closed. They both sigh deeply, wanting more but also knowing it wasn't the right thing to do. She couldn't just let him back in, he had to earn it and he wanted to.

----------------------------------------------------------

She hears a knock on her dressing room door, shouting a "one sec" as she finished applying her lipstick. Walking barefoot to the door and swinging it open, revealing her best friend's girlfriend, someone who she had missed so much. She screams excitedly before the two girls are hugging each other tightly, Charli then pulls back, a stern look on her face.

"What the fuck is going on with Matty?" she asks, a little too loudly for Lou's liking. She pulls her inside quickly, looking down the hallway to see if anyone was looking. She shuts the door behind her, before turning to the girl who was now sat on her sofa, arms crossed. She sighs before sitting herself next to her.

"How the fuck did you find out?" Lou asks, making Charli laugh.

"So there is something going on?" she has a smirk on her face.

"Yes, no. Fuck I dunno. We kissed, twice thats it" she lies. "Who told you?" she speaks, biting her lip nervously, awaiting her friends reaction.

"George" she says, making Lou's stomach drop, Charli gauges her reaction and sighs "yeah he's not too happy, he said he overheard Ross and Matty having a conversation about you" that was news to her "he confronted Matty about it, so he told G everything and... apparently they're not talking" she says awkwardly.

"What? Why? Fuck this is bad... everything?" Lou says, stressing herself out, biting her lip and ruining her lipstick. Charli nods at her question, a slight smirk resting on her lips.

"Calm down it will be okay. George said he was annoyed that Matty practically made your life hell when in fact he was just in love with you" her stomach drops again, heart pounding.

"Hey he did not say he was in love with me!" she says, panicking again.

"shit..." charli says.

"He said he was in love with me?!" she asks and Charli shrugs, half nodding at her.

"Jesus Christ" her head finds her hands, resting there. Her breath is deep, laboured and she feels Charli's hand on her back. She thinks over all the information she's just been told.

"Wait a sec, what was this conversation Ross and Matty had?" she asks.

"Matty thought you and Ross had a thing, Ross told him you didn't and he confessed how much he had liked you and said it was why he was the way he was with you" she says, some new information in her words but some Matty had admitted to.

"Jesus christ that man is dellusional"

"You like him don't you?" she says, eyebrows raising.

"I dunno Charli, honestly I don't know...." she says, speaking from her rational side, her heart telling her she was lying.

"The truth is, he makes me excited, but he had treated me like shit for most of our lives and now he's telling me he had always liked me but thought I was going to reject him. He said he'd prove what he meant, that he was actually sorry. It's confusing, the truth is I haven't had a chance to figure out if i like him, like truly like him. I know i fancy him, i know he gets on my nerves but..." she trails off.

"It's passionate right?" charli asks and Lou nods.

"What's the problem then? He said he'd prove what he said right?" Lou nods again. She hears a banging coming from her door, whoever it was didn't sound happy. She walks over to it, the door swinging open to reveal, a very angry George.

"I swear I'm going to kill him" he says, barging in and pacing her room.

"Okay, calm down" she says, George sighs heavily, plonking down next to his girlfriend, arms crossed.

"You're not going to kill your best friend George"

"Yes i fucking am. He can't just treat you like shit all these years and then fucking confess his feelings for you like this. I could cope with him hating you, just hating you, but the fact he's been lying to me basically all my life has pissed me off" he says, Charli looks at Lou before she speaks.

"G" she says, making her man turn to her "stop being a dick, this isn't about you, Lou has been your best friend since you were babies and you haven't once asked how she is" she feels thankful to her for that.

"Shit you're right" he says, Lou offers him a small smile.

"Always am baby, anyway I will leave you to it" she says, placing a kiss to her boyfriend's cheek, hugging Lou and then leaving. Lou sits down next to her best friend and George takes her hand in his.

"I'm sorry for making it about me. Are you okay?" he asks, she shrugs.

"I'm just confused" she smiles a weak smile again.

"I mean... to be honest it does make a little sense, but I'm still pissed at the guy" he says.

"Please don't be, this whole thing is complicated enough as it is, doesn't need to be more complicated. He's your best friend G" she says, and he squeezes her hand.

"So are you.... why couldn't he just not be a pussy and just have told you... would've saved years of you hating each other" he says and she shrugs, not knowing the answer.

"What's happening then?" he asks.

"I dunno, he said he's sorry and I said he needs to prove it... years of being rude to each other can't be solved by a few kisses and the words "Im sorry" but that goes for me too" she says.

George groans "oh god you guys are going to be making out all over the place aren't you?" he says and she chuckles at this.

"Honestly G... I don't know. You want the truth?" she says and he nods "always" he says.

"As much as he gets under my skin, I liked the way he made me feel, but it came from all that hatred. So who knows what will happen if you remove all that?" she says and George hugs her.

"I guess we shall see. but if he hurts you I will kill the man" he says. She puts her shoes on shortly after, fixing her lipstick before the pair return to the main room. George makes a direct beeline to Matty.

"Are we okay?" Matty asks, and George nods.

"Yeah mate we're good" he says, hugging him tightly, what Lou doesn't hear is the "but if you hurt her I will kill you" to which Matty replies "don't plan on it mate"

Lou feels a hand wrap around her shoulder, looking up to see Ross, who smiles down at her, his hair now in a bun, he's wearing a white shirt and black slacks, his blazer thrown over a near by sofa.

"You good?" he asks and she nods up at him, cuddling into his chest as he squeezes her.

"Good" he says, she pulls back to look him and smirks.

"Heard Matty thought we were a thing" she says and they both fall silent for a beat before they both laugh loudly at the idea of it. Her eyes then fall on Matty who's standing across the room, he smiles at the two of them and they both smile back. Ross then leaves her to talk to Hann and Matty finds his way to her.

George and Charli are making out on the sofa, making her roll her eyes at the pair.

"They're gross right?" Matty says, coming to stand next to her.

"Sickening" she says, making them both laugh.

"You look lovely darling" he says honestly. She adorns a similar outfit to the previous nights however she's changed it up slightly, instead of her usual black shorts or jeans and a black shirt, she wears a short black skirt which rests against her upper thigh, tights and a white tee that is tucked in, a black tie is loosely worn around her neck. She wears a leather suit jacket that finishes above her knee and a pair of ankle boots that are healed, making her a little taller.

She organised outfits with the stylists who had joined them this tour, the same as the guys would, she picked several for each night, deciding on the night which one she wore.

"Yeah think they got my wardrobe mixed up with yours" she smirks and he realises that she does indeed resemble him, but at the same time the outfit is unmistakably her style too.

"It's a good look" he too smirks down at her.

"Must have the same taste" she says and they laugh again.

"Looks better on you love" he speaks softly, another pet name easily rolling off his tongue. They are then being called on stage.

"Umm... Good luck love" he says a bit awkwardly, making her smile.

"Yeah, you too" she says and she goes to walk the other direction but his hand halts her a second, pulling her back to him, nearly making her collide with his chest.

"I told the crew to put your mic next me to be during about you, hope that's okay" he says, his face is moving slowly downwards to hers and she nods thoroughly before he places a sweet kiss to her lips.

"Sorry, couldn't help myself" he says, he's apolising because he knows he shouldn't be doing it, he hadnt proved anything to her her and he didn't deserve it.

"I don't mind" she smiles, leaning up to place a firmer one on his lips before they're getting ushered away by Jamie who stands there, rolling his eyes.

"Shouldn't have expected anything else to be honest" he says to himself under his breath.

----------------------------------------------------------They get on stage and it's a show like no other. The band are sounding the best they have so far, bouncing off each other. Her harmonies seem clearer today, not sure if someone had turned up her microphone but whatever it was, she loved it. The way her voice blended with Matty's, complimented it perfectly. The time came for About You to be performed and Matty turned to her, ushering her down the stage, she followed his instructions and placed herself behind the microphone that was placed next to his.

Her voice rang out at the right times and everyone cheered during her solo. But what made her heart swell was the look on Matty's face, he sat on the top of a sofa next to her, smiling across from her as she sung. Her eye contact remained with the crowd then, for she knew one look at Matty and she'd be done for.

The final notes played out and the band and the crowd cheered loudly for her.

"Ladies and gentlemen the wonderful Lou!" Matty said, gesturing towards her before pulling her into a tight hug, the act surprises her but she feels her eyes shutting as her palms rest flat against his back, her head tilted to the side, cheek against his chest due to the height difference. It was the second time they had ever hugged and she felt undeniably comfortable.

They pulled away, she went back to her spot and her eyes snapped to George who was focused on her already. His eyebrows raised at her as if to say " what the fuck was that". She shrugs over at him before looking at Ross who is smiling across at her, truly just happy to see the two getting along.

The show finishes and she doesn't wait at the side stage when they do their final bows like they usually would. Instead she makes her way to her dressing room, needing to be alone to think for a bit. She felt a tad overwhelmed, she quickly lights a cigarette, the nicotine coating her tongue easing her nerves a little.

She sighs, staring across from where she was sat, disassociating for what felt like only a second. Until she's hearing a soft knock on the other side of the door. She doesn't even remember stubbing out her finished cigarette but the butt is lying against an ash tray on the table in front of her.

"Everything alright in there?" Matty's voice is soft but muffled by the wood. Part of her doesn't want him to come in, she knew one look at him would have her crumbling and right now she needed to seriously think about everything and figure out the reasonable thing to do next. But her voice is betraying her as she says her next words.

"Yeah! You can come in if you'd like" she says, and the door is opening then, revealing Matty, only difference was he had already changed, a pair of black jeans and a black shirt resting against his body. She didn't realize how long she had been sitting there thinking for.

"Didn't want to get changed?" He asks, his voice is quiet, as if he was scared what would happen if he spoke up a little.

"Sorry, I got distracted, time seems to have escaped me" she lets out a weak chuckle.

"I can leave you to get changed" he says going to stand but her hand finds his, stopping him in his tracks. She shakes her head at him, silently asking him to stay. He sits back down, not moving his hand from under hers.

"You sounded amazing tonight... More than usual I mean" he says.

"Thank you, so did you" she says, smiling at him, he doesn't say anything to her compliment of him, instead speaks sincerely about her.

"Carly is wonderful don't get me wrong. But there's something about the way you sing 'About You'" he says, smiling at her now. "Like it was made for you" he says and she finds her smile stretching wider at his words.

"That's sweet. Thank you Matty" she says.

"Anyway... Um. I'm going to leave you to get changed. Jamie said we need to be on the bus soon" he says and she nods at him.

"Find me on the bus yeah?" He asks next and she nods again. He quickly pulls her into a quick hug, one that she barely registers before he's left the room.

She quickly removes her shirt and skirt, leaving the tights on as she throws one of George's hoodies over her frame, it was basically a dress on her anyway. She quickly got her things together before she left the room, one of the crew assisting her to the tour bus.

She finds the whole group sitting in the main room, all smiling at her as she entered. She had hoped no one would be there so she could sneak into her bunk undetected.

"Hey rockstar!" Ross says, standing up to hug her tightly. Matty looks at the both of them, but he doesn't feel as jealous anymore.

She looks up at Ross and he instantly knows she's not okay.

"Give me a minute yeah?" She says and he nods down at her, letting her leave.

"Is she okay?" Matty finds himself asking, feeling protective over her already.

"I've got this" George says, knowing he's the only person she could deal with right now. He untangles himself from his girlfriend, placing a peck against her lips before moving to find his best friend. He finds her at the room at the back of the bus, a slightly larger room behind their individual bunks.

"Hey, you okay pumpkin?" He asks, using the nickname he knows she likes, one he has called her since they were young, especially reserved for moments like these. She goes to speak but no sound comes out.

"Talk to me Lou says" her lips begin to quiver and his eyes find her watery ones and he quickly pulls her into a tight hug.

"Hey, hey it's okay. It's okay" he says, hands smoothing over her hair. The sleeves of the jumper she's wearing are quickly wiping away the tears.

"talk to me" he says softly.

"I'm just overwhelmed G.... I love you guys and this has been amazing so far but fuck... It's overwhelming... Everything is just too much" she says and he understands every word.

"Hey it's okay, I get it" he feels a sob rip through her and it shakes her body, so he holds her tighter against him.

"I guess I just miss my band... And my family and your family... And everything with matty is just confusing me and..." She just continues to cry then. Often Lou would feel everything all at once and it would take one thing to get all the things she had been pushing away to come to the surface. And the catalyst this time was Matty.

"I said if he hurts you I will kill him" George warns and she pulls back to look at him.

"No George. It's not that... It's just... He's being really kind and sweet now and everything on stage.... It was lovely but it's just confusing" she says and George nods down at her, thumbs swiping under her cheeks to remove the tears. He knows how she's feeling without her even having to say it and he knows what she really wants to say.

"You're my best friend right?" He asks and she nods "like my sister" and she nods again.

"I know you better than anyone and you know me better than anyone" she nods again.

"You're confused because you think you might genuinely fall for him and you're scared of what would happen if you let yourself fall" he says and his words hit her like a ton of bricks. Her mouth falls open and he chuckles lightly. He pulls her against him again, delivering a soft peck to her forehead.

"I know you're scared... Think he is too... Because this might be the greatest thing that could happen to both of you... If you treat each other the way you should" he says and she knows he's right.

"I know I said a lot of shit... But I think it would be pretty epic if my two best friends loved each other" he continues and she looks up at him then.

"Thanks G" she says, he always had her back and knew what to say and how to help.

"Better still have time for me though" he says making her laugh.

"I'll always have time for you G, you're my best friend. Always"

"Always" they hug one more time before she tidies herself up, the pair returning to the group who are chatting away about god knows what.

Matty's eyes find hers and he smiles at her and that makes her smile.

"Good?" He mouths and she nods "good"

Part 5

[ctrl-alt-deleting-yr-face]

fuck it

i’m not scared

going through the entire oc ask game list for fun and answering them for hikari

i wanna post more about her but i get nervous!! but i’m still gonna do it anyways!!

be prepared, it’s a long one ^^

Note: As i was writing this i realized it got too long. So uh. I’ll be making a part 2. ^^

Edit: part 2 is up!

“Associated color?” Blue and white. Hikari is mainly associated with those two colors. Purple and yellow are also in there, but blue and white definitely make up the main palette ^^

“Favorite music genre?” Definitely indie rock, especially surf rock. Drawings Of Nothing by Archer Oh would probably be her favorite song, since it’s like. THE Hikari song in my brain

“Choice of weapon?” Hikari doesn’t really like to fight when it’s unnecessary. But she doesn’t use a weapon! She uses her magic to make big ol claws on her hands! She likes it since it feels natural. It’s an extension of her body, and she can get as up close and personal as she wants without really dealing with consequences, so she doesn’t mind!

“Are they crafty?” Vaguely? Not very much, though. She probably would if she spent more time alone, but since she’s always used to having others around, she doesn’t really get the chance to be super crafty.

“Usual wardrobe, practical or aesthetic focused?” Typically Hika would probably just wear her usual outfit or knight uniform, but if not she’d probably lean towards aesthetics. That’s not to say she doesn’t have cozy clothes! Sometimes she has a hard day and she just wants to curl up in the biggest, fluffiest sweater ever. ^^

“Hair?” VERY long and sleek blue hair. Usually she wears it tied in twintails, high twintails in her Xrd design and low twintails in her Strive design. It’s only really worn down when Nekomata takes over

“Favorite animal?” Now, you’d guess cat. After all, they’re not only a big part of her (locked away) past, but she also has cat ears and a tail! However, you must remember. She doesn’t give a fuck about herself. The only person she really does? Romeo. Her favorite animals are sheep.

“Nickname?” Not a real one, no. The most she has is Delilah calling her “big sis” at times and Romeo calling her an “insufferable cat”

“Favorite/least favorite food?” Dragonfruit is absolutely her favorite. She LOVES dragonfruit. As for least favorite.. Probably mutton, rock candy, or anything extremely bitter.

“Jewelry?” Not a ton? Unless you count her brooch and shackles on her strive design, which are made of a silvery metal, not really.

“How much are they like you?” Well, we’re both autistic, queer, love music, and vaguely depressed. So I’d probably get along pretty well with her.

“How long have they been around? Birthday?” Hikari is a very interesting case, to say the least. To start with the easy part, Hikari’s birthday is October 30th. I don’t remember why i decided that, it certainly wasn’t the day i made her, i think it just felt right. But as for how long she’s been alive… It’s complicated. Both physically and mentally, Hikari is in her late teens. 17-19 range. However, technically… She’s probably like in her 30s. This is because she died during the crusades as a teenager and she was brought back to life by the magical foci who fell in love with her and fused with her, turning her into an immortal yokai herself. She was actually alive in Baiken’s colony when it was around! I was thinking the attack that destroyed the colony and took Baiken’s arm and eye was the same one that killed Hikari at the time.

“How many languages can they speak?” 2! Hikari is fluent in both Japanese and English! She thinks it’s funny to annoy Romeo in Japanese since he can’t properly respond to it

“Good with numbers?” Vaguely? Her knowledge goes to like maybe beginning of algebra 1 and that’s it. She learned a lot from Romeo.

“What’s their family like?” Before their deaths, Hikari lived a quaint life in one of the Japanese colonies with her dad, older brother, and very abusive mom. They were all rather loving and didn’t mind Hikari’s differences and behavioral struggles (aside from the mom). After they all died, Hikari was revived, and her memories were erased, there was a long period of time where Hikari only had Bedman. He was all she knew. After his death, she was struck with deep grief. Grief that began to heal after she managed to meet Delilah. She sees Delilah, the bedframe, and Baiken to be the closest she has to having Romeo back at the current moment. She currently lives with them when she’s not working at the castle, and of course, Romeo joins their little household once he’s revived.

“Any pets?” Nope! She loves animals but never really had the chance to care for any pets.

“How did they spend their free time as a child?” Hikari loved nature before her death. Especially the forest and water. Whether it be running through the grass while calling out to singing birds, splashing in creeks with her brother, or accompanying her dad on fishing trips, she always wanted to be outside.

[peachymilkandcream]

Hello! I have a scenario in mind!

What if Evelyn accidentally breaks one of Levi's favourite teacups and gets really scared. She decides to hide it from him for sometime and instead seduces him and has sex with him to put him in a good mood. After the deed is done, she waits for sometime before confessing her mistake to him. What would he do? Punish her or spare her?

Levi x Evelyn -> Just Pretend

(A/N: Hello to you too Anon! Giving me devious little ideas with these two. Thanks for the request ^^)

WARNINGS: noncon, dubcon, manipulation, domestic abuse, yandere themes, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, stockholm syndrome, violence, mind breaking, misogyny, etc.

==========================================

Evelyn froze for a good five minutes after the initial crash. She was stuck in a state of disbelief, as if she stared at the shattered pieces long enough they would just disappear. Levi loved this cup, it was white on the outside with a singular gold band, but the inside was black with with a gold rose and vine pattern on it. Now that pattern mocked her as it stared into frightened eyes. Evelyn cursed her clumsiness, all she could do to fill her mind-numbingly dull days was read. Levi always would buy whichever ones she wanted, reasoning that if she had new, constructive things to do she'd spend less time escaping. It had come back to bite her in the ass, not looking where she was going and brushing it off the clean dish rack.

As she heard footsteps on the stair adrenaline kicked in. It wasn't Levi, he wouldn't be home for another hour if Erwin or Petra didn't keep him. Normally the thought of Petra flashing her tits at Levi just to get him to look her way had her rolling her eyes. She loathed Levi but expected loyalty nonetheless from both sides. Now she hoped Petra did annoy him enough to slow him down, buy her some more time. On the stair however was probably a maid, Evelyn swore they enjoyed her suffering and eagerly told Levi all of her faults, listening in when she got beaten or fucked senseless. The heartless bitches.

"Mrs. Ackerman? Is everything okay? I heard a crash."

Evelyn rolled her eyes, the snitch was probably hurrying to catch her in the act. "I'm fine. Just go back to what you were doing." Evelyn raced to grab the broom and dustpan, furiously sweeping.

However before she was done the maid in question, a girl her own age, enters the kitchen. Once she takes in the scene her eyes widen, the same maid who always was quick to tell on Evelyn. Their eyes meet and the girl opens her mouth to scream, but before she does Evelyn grabs her and pins her against the wall, covering her mouth with her hand.

"Listen to me you insufferable bitch. You think I don't know the shit you pull to gain Levi's favour? You enjoy knowing he beats the hell out of me after you open your fat fucking mouth. Anything to get him to notice you you fucking slut. You'd love to see him take it too far and kill me or throw me out wouldn't you?" Her grip tightens. "Wouldn't you!?"

The maid is sobbing and terrified, trying to fight her. She'd never seen her mistress have such a hysterical look in her eye, clearly Mrs. Ackerman was desperate not to face her husbands wrath, even if she was the one who told him of his wife's wrongdoings.

"You forget, I'm the mistress of this house, I may hate it with everything in my being but damn it I'm an Ackerman! You will respect me!" Evelyn pulls the girl back, turning her to face the wall and slamming her forehead into it again and again. Since she was in the Scouts before her marriage she had more strength than the maid. Blood stained the wall and eventually the other woman went still.

She pulled the body back to look into the lifeless eyes of one of the women who caused her more hell than she needed in her marriage. Part of her wanted to be sick, proclaiming oneself as an Ackerman and then demanding respect before brutally beating or murdering a person was Levi's trademark. Maybe he was getting to her more than she thought.

================================================

Levi came home exactly on time as he always did, Evelyn had burned her bloodstained dress and cleaned up the cup. The body of the unfortunate servant was temporarily moved until Levi could dispose of it better. The fact that his wife just murdered someone wouldn't phase him, if anything he'd enjoy that she was becoming a callous monster like him.

She met him at the door, a fresh face of makeup as always, he always wanted her looking her best for him. "Welcome home Levi." Her lips found his gingerly, it was robotic, programmed into her.

He was much more warm, bringing her in a brief embrace and kissing her with more passion. "Evelyn."

She hesitates, considering if her plan will even work, or if she's just degrading herself for no reason. She swallows her fears and pride before pulling Levi's head towards hers and capturing his lips in a passionate kiss.

He's surprised at first, especially when her tongue slides into his mouth, tangling with his. A grunt escapes him as he pulls her closer to him, making sure she feels how hard he is, grinding slightly until she gasping and moaning into his mouth. This moment is too good to be true, she's never wanted him like this. Maybe finally she's come to her senses and will comply with him.

"Upstairs." She breathes, her voice breathless and airy.

He doesn't hesitate and lifts her in his arms, bringing her up the stairs and almost throwing her on the bed. It didn't take much from her to get into his pants, the mere thought that she wanted it makes him hard as a rock and needy.

Before he can pounce on her she holds her hand up in a 'Wait'. At first he gets annoyed, prepared to ignore her request until she stands and strips slowly, teasing him. He's so hard it's painful, it takes everything in him from pinning her down and taking her. All the dirty thoughts racing in his mind pause when she speaks.

"Levi..?"

"What is it?"

She's acting, but acting shy makes him squirm as she chews her bottom lip as if embarrassed. "Would you...take me from behind again...? It felt so much better...please...?"

Truly she was a goddess. It was so fake and all staged to fuel his ego, he knew. But it didn't change that all he wanted was to be balls deep in her soaking cunt. With a simple nod she assumes position on the bed, bent with her legs spread, glancing back at him innocently.

He takes his time undoing his belt and removing his clothes, he wants to give her a show too. He smirks when he sees the arousal making her pussy glisten, she couldn't fake that if she tried. He teases her entrance with the tip, taking note of how she wiggles against it. Such a good girl for him, just wanting to please her husband.

When he slides all the way in she moans loudly, pushing her hips back against him before he could even start moving, desperate for some kind of friction. He complies and meets her thrusts, making the bed creak and shake as they use each other for pleasure. No matter how much he's abused her pussy it's still tight when he's inside, reaffirming in his mind she was perfectly made for him and him alone.

He suddenly stops moving, making her look at him in confusion. "Use my dick like the whore you are."

She's flushed but he can see her face go a shade redder as she sheepishly bumps her hips against him again. Eventually finding a rhythm until she was drooling from the pressure, her tongue out and her eyes rolled back. He could feel her tightening around him, she was close.

"You want to cum do you?"

"Please Levi?"

He grabs her hips to stop her from moving, taking half a second pause before bringing her forcefully up and down his cock. She's whimpering and practically crying from too much stimulation until she's spasming and clenching around his dick with all her strength.

As she comes down he slams into her again, prolonging the orgasm and making sure his cum shooting inside of her is associated with the pleasure of a climax. All part of his conditioning to make her into what he wants her to be.

===============================================

As they lay in bed together the next morning they just study each other's features. She allowed him to hold her tenderly like a lover, like a husband. Panic filled her to the point of nausea but she had to tell him, confessing would be better than him figuring it out.

"Levi...?"

"Mm? What's wrong?"

Tears fall down her cheeks, this time it's not acting, she's genuinely terrified. "I'm so sorry- It was an accident- I knocked your cup- and it broke- I didn't mean to I promise. I'm sorry Levi please forgive me-"

Levi is silent for a long time, a really long time. Each second that passes without an answer more concerning to her than the last. She just wants him to get it over with, to say something. But if she spoke out now then he'd punish her for interrupting his thoughts.

"So this is why you were so eager with me last night." It was simply a statement.

She nods sheepishly, suddenly ashamed.

Another long stretch of silence before he finally speaks.

"I'll overlook what you've done this time."

"You will..?"

"You've learned your lesson. You understand how to earn my forgiveness. I can afford to forgive this transgression."

"I killed the the maid-" She blurts.

He simply shrugs. "I can deal with that later. They're all replaceable."

She couldn't understand how he was so calm. It was eerie. "You'd tell me if you were upset?"

He nods, stretching and picking up one of his novels. "You'd know if I was."

She continues to stare at him, taken aback by his relaxed nature.

When he catches her eyes he smirks slightly. "Unless you want me to punish you."

"N-No I'm fine-"

He goes back to reading but she can't miss that devious look on his face.

[cicadangel]

erm.! diary 12/4

hi i havent been online in a bit or written any diary entries recently bc well i was really depressed and then i just like forgot or whatever. but uhmmm life updates sorta/just how im doing right now.

i will start with the good news :-) i am not depressed! ive been feeling good pretty consistently for the past 2 weeks i think? ive been happy enough to be able to function normally and do all the stuff i need to do. also school swim started so i got to see my crush (the one i talked abt a bunch last year) and i actually need him so bad he's so fine i need him. not much has happened w him (in terms of moments or whatever) but it will soon trust!!!!!! also ive been feeling a bit more confident lately in terms of how i think guys percieve me so i hope maybe that will inspire me to make a move but probably not. oh well.

as for everything else. well. i have been having issues with that one bitch "friend" ofc hoping to hit her with a car sometime soon. but thats not rly new ig. i am kind of having issues too tho with one of my other friends bc he's being weird and annoying. recently hes been extremely sensitive abt just everything which is whatever except he won't tell me, he'll just get upset and try to get me to ask him if he's upset except i won't play that game ugghhhhh if u have a problem with me tell me bc i wont understand otherwise!!! i cannot possibly fathom what he's got wrong with him about me so im not even gonna try. if he wants to fix it he can use his words otherwise no bueno it is not happening!!!!

he's also been like. weird to me recently. we're in psychology class together and we're gonna be at the "abnormal behavior" unit soon (which is mental illnesses) and he keeps saying ohhhh we're almost at your unit we're almost there when it's like stop thats actually so annoying. i am abnormal and crazy but that's not ur place to say? i dont talk to my friends abt my mental illness struggles but i guess it is obvious there's smth wrong with me or whatever but it's just annoying. i will talk abt how im against involuntary commitment to psych wards and how sooooo many therapists only end up doing more harm than good and my problems with the whole mental health industry and the modern understanding of it bc it's smth im rly passionate abt, but he just brushes me off as if i dont have first hand experience with all of the terrible ways psychiatry and the mental health industry can fuck people up???? i also feel weird talking to him in general sometimes bc i know he'll bring me up to his therapist (because he constantly mentions it) and i feel like i cant talk to him bc he's gonna tell her and that just puts a weird strain on the relationship. like his therapist knows me, but just from his pov and that kinda weirds me out im ngl.

oh i also got in a fight w my mom today. actually we're still fighting. it was over something soooo insignificant but i got so overly angry like i always do and now im going to make it ruin the rest of my day because i am insufferable. she's just been really angering me lately also ive been feeling destructive which is complicated. i dont rly like the term "splitting" but it's def what ive been doing a lot lately. ugh. also i like dont know what to do with my bpd "diagnosis" it makes me angry and like i just have so many problems with it in so many ways REGARDLESS if i actually have it or whatever which i could talk abt for hours. in some ways it's nice to have a label for what ive been going through my whole life but in most ways i am like not too happy with the fact that ive been handed a disqualification from ever being upset again. if i am, it'll just be because im a crazy borderline! ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway. more on that whole mess later sorry

[jorisjurgen]

do all of them.........................................................................................................................................

OHOHO THANK YOU

the character everyone gets wrong

OH BOYYY DO I HAVE ONE.

Asriel Dreemurr/Flowey the Flower - I don't even know what to say, when I've said it again and again and again for the last 8 years

Here's one of my unhinged rants.

a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

joris jurgen is unfuckable. he is so aromantic he repels people. he tried dating once or twice and then was like ouuugh so this is like spending time avec ma famillie but worse and fucking boring. and then he gave up 3 days into the relationship. i think he went through a comphet phase as a teenage boy but he is so aromantic he was in misery trying to hold a girl's hand.

screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

if i speak up i go to jail. undertale fandom in general though...

worst discord server and why

i think all of them are bad. the worst ones i leave immediately, and the others i tolerate until i cannot anymore.

which ship fans are the most annoying?

I no longer do shipping (lying. not lying. lying) after becoming a crepinjurgenite platonic relationships connoisseur. But anyone who harasses people because of ships is annoying to me. Or anyone who demonizes female characters about it.

what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

Chara undertale. I love them but I hate them.

common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

Chara and Asriel are not siblings, and neither are Frisk and Asriel.

worst part of canon

the entirety of wakfu and everything else in that franchise that isn't THE HIT FRENCH CARTOON "Dofus : Aux Trésors de Kerubim", featuring the titular characters Kerubim Crepin and Joris Jurgen, which you can watch on Ankama Launcher, sometimes Youtube, Various Free Yet Dubiously Legal Streaming Sites, AND other sites!

worst part of fanon

undertale aus.

number of fandom-related words you've filtered

unspeakable.

the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

Flowey the Flower AKA Asriel Dreemurr if this is about characters that are actively hated by the fandom (I already spoke about him so this is self explanatory) and Atcham Crepin if this is about characters nobody cares about. My whole blog is an argument to stanning Atcham. don't you love binguses. don't you love batshit insane implications of abuse and bullying.

worst blorboficiation

replied to this one with an essay.

that one thing you see in fics all the time

n/a for the most part but ehh, I think it annoys me when kh fics about roxas and axel don't have xion in them, post kh3. she is their bestie and should be included. also fics that turn flowey into asriel and it makes everything better.

that one thing you see in fanart all the time

n/a. fanart is a gift from outer gods.

you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

woobifying characters, villainizing characters, I don't know how people end up taking the opposite away from a character so often. it's not even the same character, by then.

I also don't really get oc/canon and selships, but it's not annoying, just something I literally don't get. But a lot of art with that is pretty, and I dig it, so I hope people have fun.

there should be more of this type of fic/art

flowey/asriel content about his mental health + joris jurgen fics about his mental health and family. I am on my way fellow Flowey Fan Club members, one of these days i WILL finish that one fic that's been sitting on my hard drive for like five years now.

it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

flowisk. flowey x frisk. I had been it's fan for 8 agonizing lonely years and all my mutuals have since deactivated. it's death out here.

my explaination of what i see in it, bc i don't know what to say that i hadn't yet said.

you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

IF I SPEAK UP, I WILL GO TO WAKFU FANDOM JAIL.

But people who were in my twitter circles know.

part of canon you found tedious or boring

rewatching wakfu when i could have just rewatched THE HIT FRENCH CARTOON "Dofus : Aux Trésors de Kerubim", featuring the titular characters Kerubim Crepin and Joris Jurgen, which you can watch on Ankama Launcher, sometimes Youtube, Various Free Yet Dubiously Legal Streaming Sites, AND other sites! twice instead.

part of canon you think is overhyped

wakfu because it's not THE HIT FRENCH CARTOON "Dofus : Aux Trésors de Kerubim", featuring the titular characters Kerubim Crepin and Joris Jurgen, which you can watch on Ankama Launcher, sometimes Youtube, Various Free Yet Dubiously Legal Streaming Sites, AND other sites!

your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

THE HIT FRENCH CARTOON "Dofus : Aux Trésors de Kerubim", featuring the titular characters Kerubim Crepin and Joris Jurgen, which you can watch on Ankama Launcher, sometimes Youtube, Various Free Yet Dubiously Legal Streaming Sites, AND other sites!

ship you've unwillingly come around to

i have never come around to a ship before in my life. if i had then i promptly forgot about it.

topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

shipping morality discourses.

NEVER quit the grind! you will consume that fiction in such a god honoring way, that you'll go to heaven immediately. fiction is reality makes people commit murders, break vases in search of gold, and raid ancient temples. So we should forbid burn this shit asap.

common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

people asking others to draw or write more of their favorite characters, because the character a person likes is "overrated". This was a big thing in AHIT fandom, where I was, for once, lucky enough to be the fan of the most popular character, lol.

Even if I am a little bitter hater, I square up, and draw or write about my favorite characters myself. I don't think people in fandoms owe it to you to draw your favorite character or ship.

[thepaintedlady00]

Nightshade Chapter 8 Sneak Peek!

Enjoy your pick guys 😅👀😊

🛁

"Are you okay with this?" Peter asked softly. "Patrick or I can take care of him."

"I've got it Pete," I assured him with a smile.

Patrick ruffled my hair. "We're one holler away if you need us, little sister."

I combed my hair down and lovingly flipped them off before turning and closing the door. My bed was empty. "Jake?" The bathroom door creaked slightly and there was a light commotion echoing in the bathroom. I carefully pushed it open to find Jake laying in the bathtub, his eyes screamed shut as he tried to steady his breathing. "Jake?"

"I just need a minute," he said breathlessly. Frustrated and embarrassed, his face tightened.

"That's okay," I said slowly, moving to stand next to the tub. "There any room for one more?"

Jake looked up at me for a minute before silently sitting up and making space for me to climb into the tub with him. It was tight, uncomfortable but I could tell that having me close helped him relax. "This is fucking ridiculous."

"Yeah, I've always said they need to make bathtubs bigger."

He chuckled. "Not that." Gesturing to himself he scoffed. "Me. I'm… I'm being fucking stupid."

"No you aren't," I assured him, resting my chin on my knees. "If it works it's not stupid."

I thought he was going to laugh again, but instead, he made a strange noise. "You know, I used to lay in the bathtub at Simone's parent's house and hold my breath until I felt like I was going to pass out." The confession was quiet but focused. His tense posture didn't shift as he continued, "I wanted to feel what she did… Wanted to know if my mom suffered when she drowned." He shook his head as if he was trying to keep certain memories from taking root. "When I was a bit older I actually added water. Almost drowned myself by accident before Simone found me. She was livid. Dragged me out of the bath and screamed at me for being selfish and stupid. And that was when she told me the truth." He took deep breaths as his face twisted into an expression of anger and guilt. "It wasn't an accident. My mom… She walked into the water and she chose to die."

I forced myself to stay calm, though the new information made my own guilt about Jake's involvement with my trauma rage inside me. This isn't about me. This is about him. I reminded myself. I wouldn't force my guilt on him, not when it wasn't his fault I felt that way, not when he needed me at this moment. "I'm sorry Jake. That… That doesn't sound like it was easy."

His eyes met mine as a tear escaped his tight hold. "What did I do? What did I do to make her do that?" Oh, Jake… He shook his head, laughing quietly. "I know I'm an insufferable asshole… I know I'm annoying and selfish and manipulative… But I just…" All I could hear was Simone. This was her voice in his head, her voice telling him it was his fault, that he was the problem.

"Listen to me," I instructed softly as I moved in the small tub, practically laying on top of him as I took hold of his face. "It wasn't your fault. None of it." He started to shake his head again, but I held firm. "You are not annoying or selfish or manipulative. You are a human being… One that is kind of an asshole sometimes, but you just so happen to be one of the nicest assholes I've ever met."

"You don't really think that," he insisted.

"I told you about my mom," I countered. "I told you about my very impressive criminal record. If I wanted to lie to you Jake, I would've done it by now."

He closed his eyes, leaning into my hands for a minute before quietly asking, "Why is it so easy with you?"

"Must be my unparalleled charisma."

Jake laughed, bright blue eyes staring up at me free of  his usual restrictions. I could see everything he felt and realized why he always forced himself to look so grumpy. Those blue eyes studied my face before moving to my hair as he lifted a hand to run his fingers through it. "I never thought I'd get this attached to you." He shook his head. "You were supposed to be easy… A quick fling to make me feel better."

I refrained from laughing. "Do I not make you feel better?"

"You do," he admitted. "You make me feel like myself."

"That's a good thing, isn't it?"

Another tear rolled down his cheek. "It's been a long time since I've been me."

[devianttxrts]

when nahla got another inside glimpse at stella, she wasn’t expecting it to involve her doing karaoke. it threw her for another loop, which made it impossible for her to call her out for this sounding like a date. it wasn’t even a blip on her radar, and she tilted her head as she looked at her. “you’re not one to toot your own horn at all, are you? i guess that's something i need to be the judge of for myself.” sarcasm gave way for genuineness at the end. truthfully, she liked stella’s cockiness. she was downright attracted to it, even when it found its way beneath her skin. she couldn’t even imagine how much more insufferable stella would be if she discovered that fact, so it was best she kept it to herself. “i don’t recall shutting the fuck up for long, so maybe you’re not as good at it as you think you are.” decidedly, she was feeling better enough to embrace the smirk she could feel tugging at her lips. it was like being on a rollercoaster that never ended, nahla was sure the risk of whiplash was around every corner, but there was no denying the satisfaction she got from knowing she got to stella in kind, seeing the little tells anyone else would miss if they blinked. “why do i feel like you’re mocking me?” if she was so inclined, and it wasn’t stella the look was aimed at, nahla might have a pout on her lips. “but maybe. or at least your head.” honestly, she didn’t care. she just wanted stella to think about her, which she was pretty sure classed as needy, like she could help it. if anyone had asked even a month ago how she’d feel without stella there to increase her blood pressure, she would have said overjoyed. how was she to know the truth would turn out to be the opposite and leave her having a mini-meltdown when she did see her again? god, nahla hoped it was a one off, she couldn’t take the embarrassment. “i’m pretty sure i dropped all my cards earlier.” it made no sense, but she hated that she was giving stella ammo just as much as she didn’t care that she was. she took a moment, sizing stella up for anything beyond the sarcasm tinged in the words. what she found must have appeased her, because she shrugged, like she didn’t really care - like it wasn’t obvious by this whole damn thing that she did and there was no hiding it now. “it wouldn’t hurt.” her eyes found stella’s again, but it didn’t take long for a scowl to find its way back to her face after. sometimes, stella knew what to say. others, nahla was sure she just took pleasure in pushing her. “why would i want to waste my time thinking about that.” just the thought of thinking about it made her nauseous, and she couldn’t help the way her lip pulled up in something akin to disgust. she was starting to think stella thought she was hot when she was annoyed or something, because that’s where she kept landing. “how am i being stubborn? i’m the one that started this conversation.” if it could even be called that. regardless, she cocked her hip for no other reason than to press into stella’s hand. “what if i had plans tonight? what if i have plants to water, did you ever think about that?” she didn’t, she’d watered her plants in the morning like a normal person. and okay, maybe this is what stella meant when she said stubborn, she could see it if she squinted; nahla could never make anything easy. in her defense, this time it also served as a petty little revenge for her comment about having better. a hand raised to wave in the air carelessly, but when it stopped she let it fall to stella’s shoulder instead of back to her side. she didn’t have an argument for the rest, because she wanted nothing more than to go home with stella, she wanted to be with her over any back up plan she might have conjured if this hadn’t gone well; she wouldn’t lie about it. not that her behaviour so far would let her even if she did want to. she really had revealed too many of her cards. her lips pressed together - stella had finally made a point she could concede to. “one is more than enough.” 

the funny thing was that nahla was the one person who could weaponize her embarrassing hobby. she could tease her about it; and yet, she was also the only person she'd outright told. it was this conundrum that kept stella running and never quite ready. the latter was starting to change, this night alone seemed to demonstrate that. she was with her when she could be getting laid in like sixty minutes. “come and you can laugh... or not, because i'm telling you now, i'm good.” so much for not inviting her. it was now her turn to laugh because nahla was right. her ego could be suffocating; though she knew she had reason to be cocky in this case. “oh, please... it's the only time i can get you to shut the fuck up. why wouldn't i be?” skankitude? why was she like this? and more importantly why did she like... wait? stella really shouldn't be so damn turned on by four letters; it was criminally wrong. cunt. the word practically had hers dripping. how embarrassing for her, but she managed to keep her shit together. she'd take the win for what it was, since she didn't immediately drag her into the utility closet and have her way. nahla really did know how to get under her skin at every turn. her skin was both irritating and beautifully entertaining. she wouldn't glorify it though because what would be the point of fighting against her instinct so hard? “would you have preferred i think with my...” she dramatically touched her heart, like she meant it. maybe she was trying to see if she could stir something in nahla too; navigating how much of what they did was because they thought with their cunts. the little jab was amusing. her lips drew into a smirk and she laughed despite the very slight sting. “careful, you're revealing all your cards...” now she knew how to get her attention; just ignore her. but admittedly doing so actually was a hit for her too. she didn't like not being around her, somehow the quiet was starting to suffocate. before she basked it, had fun just being left to her thoughts with a pint in one hand. now they were louder; overbearing. the peace that came from her solitude had morphed into what she would call prison. stella wanted to point out that they both hadn't made any moves after their night together. the eloquence of it was refreshing. damn, she hadn't actually expected to get to her. she almost wondered while they were apart if she'd prefer it. “should i send a text next time?” it sounded sarcastic but the question in her gaze was sincere. should she? the way nahla looked away made her sick to her stomach. she wanted to chase her gaze. was she blushing? red looked as good on her as green did. “maybe i've had better, huh? you ever think about that?” she had not but that was hardly the point. she squeezed her hip. “seriously, stop being stubborn and come home with me tonight. we can pretend all we like, but you know that's where you want to be. not with one of these assholes.” she quietly pushed out the rest of her thought. "besides you already have one of those in your life, and one is enough."

[sukirichi]

Breakfast for Choso with ingredients #17 and 34 with #2 sugar? Wine is optional.

EASY 

— Nothing is ever easy with Choso, but for him, you’d push through hell and back.

meal order: breakfast + 17, 34 (fake dating, rentboy au) + 2 (enemies to lovers) + biting, scratching, choso eating reader out, sex on the beach

warnings: mature content, unedited fic, choso is mean and harsh when he’s angry

notes: thank you so much for this anon! I really enjoyed writing this and this totally made my day. I hope you like it!

word count: 10k+ LOL CHOSO BRAIN ROT

check out the fanart @tigressnej-chan made, it s so beautiful HURRR

Your day was absolutely ruined. Dark, deep bags covered your under eyes as you stormed through the convenience store downstairs your apartment, body clad in an oversized hoodie and socks visible through slippers, hair greasy and lips chapped. You’re aware you look like a mess, but did you care?

Absolutely not, especially when you haven’t been sleeping well the moment you moved into this cursed apartment because of a certain fucker.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear. That specific fucker – the cause of your ruin and the devil who prevented you from living a good life – waltzed inside the store, the small bell chiming to signal his presence. You scoffed at his confident, suave walk, further irritated because he just had to be insanely attractive – in an alternative, laid-back kind of way.

He wasn’t even your type; you preferred more refined men who wore pressed suits and leather shoes, but you had to admit this man was insanely attractive.

With deep, sunken eyes, a dark tattoo across the bridge of his nose and dark hair twisted into twin ponytails, large, muscular body covered in a black sweatshirt and a red scarf – he looked very much like a former member of a gang who retired because their barbaric ways wasn’t his thing. It was an odd theory, and you sat there at the corner of the store, glaring at the man who tiredly pressed the coffee maker machine for a dark roast.

As if feeling eyes on him, his lazy eyes slid over to yours, and almost automatically, one corner of his lips tilted up in humor. This fucker knew how much he annoyed you, and he only further pushed your buttons by walking over to you, the steam of his coffee nearly blocking your gaze.

“Good morning,” he greeted sarcastically, well aware that it definitely not a good morning for you.

“Have fun last night, neighbor?”

“Yes.”

“Jeez, you won’t even bother denying it?”

“I see no point in it,” he invited himself by sitting next to you, long legs crossed over his muscular thigh. You found yourself staring at how he seemed so firm even in loose sweatpants, averting your gaze and staring at your soggy ramen noodle cup instead.  “And you’re not trying to hide the fact you’re listening, either.”

“I wasn’t listening!” you slammed your fist down the table – he didn’t even flinch, only continuing to sip his coffee as if you weren’t burning in anger beside him – as you hissed, “The walls are too damn thin and you’re so fucking loud.”

“No, I wasn’t. She was loud, though.”

Scoffing, you crossed your arms against your chest. He really was shameless. You already knew this man didn’t have enough shame in his body, but you didn’t think he’d have absolutely nothing.

Upon witnessing your stupefied state, he reached over to knock at your skull. “Still there, princess?” you cringed at his nickname for you; you didn’t even know this guy’s name, for pete’s sake! “Or are you still too bothered by the fact I got some good fucking last night?”

You flicked his arm away from you, nearly seething in your seat. “God, you’re insufferable. I should move out.”

“Yes, I think that would be for the best too,” he nodded to himself as he stared at his now empty coffee cup. Had it been that long already? Apparently, it was, because your noodles turned cold and your neighbor was already leaving your seat, dipping for a mocking bow. “Have a nice day, neighbor. Don’t think of my cock too much,” he teased, even going as far as winking until your jaw dropped.

You watched as he threw the paper cup in the proper bin, a little surprised he was decent enough to do mundane tasks like that. Sometimes, it was so easy to forget your neighbor was also a decent human being, but whatever.

You absolutely, utterly hated him, and you kept mumbling to yourself of the different ways you’d get your revenge on him as he walked out the door, his annoyingly gorgeous ass in view. “Yeah, right,” you scowled to yourself, “As if I can get that image out my mind now.”

He would not be an easy feat.

Despite your constant pleas for him to at least be silent during the weekdays to give you enough peace of mind to study for the finals, he didn’t stop. Hours just after the sun sets, you’d hear giggles and sloppy kisses on the hallway.

No matter how much you pressed your hands into your ears and set your music on full volume to block out the noise, you could always hear them.

Your neighbor was undeniably a fuckboy. 

Every night, he’d have a different girl dangling in his arms. You knew, because the voices squealing his name while he fucked them right next door were always different. Some days, it was deep and throaty, and on other days it’d be high-pitched and nearly scraping at your ears. They all said the same thing though, such as fuck, right there, you feel so good or harder, harder, please, I’m so close!

To say you were traumatized was an understatement. You never wanted to hear such things again, but alas, your neighbor apparently couldn’t give a single shit because he was fucking someone again.

As if things couldn’t get worse, the person he brought home this time around just had to have the most fucking annoying voice ever. Or maybe it sounded like the others, but you were in the middle of memorizing veins and brain chemicals in alphabetical harder when you heard the headboard of his bed slam against your wall, the sound hard and loud enough you dropped your book in surprise.

They didn’t stop. If anything, he kept going harder until nothing but his low sexy groans and his partner’s screaming – that was right, she was fucking screaming – like she was having her insides rearranged.

You didn’t doubt the possibility that maybe she really was. Your neighbor was such a huge, attractive guy, after all, it would make sense he was capable of such. Before you knew it, you could no longer understand the words in your textbook. You kept rereading the same line over and over again, but nothing registered into your mind. You were so close to screaming at them to stop and shut the fuck up because it was three in the morning and they were still going at it, but you weren’t that mean.

Yes, you hated him, but you weren’t going to blue ball someone or make sex awkward. Sex with your ex was always awkward, so you knew how painful it was to live with that memory. No matter how much you hated your neighbor, you wouldn’t go that far.

So you trudged all the way up to the building’s public balcony, bringing a blanket with you to survive the chilly bite of the night.

You used your phone’s flashlight to read all over the textbooks, keeping your little note cards organized and color coded beside you. Finally, you could make sense of things a little bit more, and you chugged at your Red Bull to keep you awake. Time passed by so fast whenever you were lost with your nose stuck in a book, and your attention was only ripped away when the balcony door swung open, revealing your neighbor with messed up hair and bruised lips.

He looked totally fucked out.

“Oh, fuck, no – what are you doing here?”

“This balcony is for all tenants,” your neighbor barely blinked as he walked closer to you, but instead of joining you on the table, he leaned against the railings and stared into the night sky. He seemed so placid, a little approachable despite his intimidating face even, and for a moment, you were studying his sharp, masculine features before he turned your way with a passive face. “Last time I checked, I’m a tenant, therefore I have the rights to be here.”

“I don’t care,” you retorted childishly, pulling your books closer to you as if he wanted to steal it. He only raised a brow at your actions, the large muscles of his arms bulging up from where he stood.

It felt so hard to not salivate at the sight, but for the sake of your pride, you had to push those thoughts down and remind yourself why you hated him so much. “I evoke your rights. You’re not welcome here.”

“You’re awfully harsh to a stranger.”

“You’re not a stranger, you’re my neighbor who brings girls in his home every night and I can never get a wink of sleep because all I can hear is them moaning and the sound of balls slapping!”

“Vulgar,” he smirked, and he had no business looking so attractive with that arrogant smirk on his face that it took all energy you had in you to not whack him with your book.

“I think I deserve an apology.”

“I think you should mind your business.”

You stood up with a scowl, nearly shoving the book right in his chest. “Bro, I’m this close to slapping this book right in your pretty face. You see how thick this is? I’m not kidding, this will hurt. Listen, I’ve got a final exam and a suture practice this weekend. All I’m asking for is just a few hours of sleep – that’s all. I just don’t get why you always seem to be balls deep in someone at every god forsaken hour; I can’t focus on my work when the noises are so distracting. At this point, I remember their begging more than I’m familiar with nerves. I need to study, okay? I really want to graduate.”

He fell silent at your sudden rant, then, he tilted his head to the side, a small smile on his lips. “You think I have a pretty face?”

“After everything I said, that’s all you remember?”

“It’s kind of hard to listen to every word when I’m distracted by your eyes.”

His comment caught you off-guard, and your eyes widened, arm coming up to hide your face that soon began to felt warm. He only chuckled at your reaction, the sound deep and throaty that it went right straight into the pools of your belly. “My eyes – what are you talking about? Seriously, what’s wrong with you? You’re so creepy!”

“Hmm,” he snickered, “That’s the first time I’ve heard that.”

“What, no one tells you you’re creepy?”

“No, people always say I’m handsome,” he said it with such a straight face that you gave him an are you serious look, and he raised one shoulder to shrug. “I’m surprised you’re not attracted to me, to be honest.”

“Wow,” you drawled out, shaking your head with a laugh as you plopped down back to your seat in defeat. “Aren’t you full of surprises? First, I get a really horny man as my next door neighbor who keeps me up at night with his shenanigans, and now he’s got the audacity to ask me why I’m not attracted to him?”

“I mean,” he scrunched his nose cutely, a huge contrast to his domineering stature. “Why aren’t you?”

“Yeah, I give up. I’m just gonna crash at my friends tonight,” you mumbled to yourself while gathering your things, leaving your neighbor all by himself. As you reached the door, you called out to him one more time, “Oh, and by the way, you reek of pussy. Go shower or something.”

“So how’s your exams going?”

“They’re fine,” you lied through gritted teeth, slicing through the fish a lot harsher than you intended. The knife scraped against the plate and you winced at the sound, ignoring your father’s loud munching. “Not too much of a big deal. My professors are nice and my classmates are nice too. I’m fitting in really well and I think I’ll even come out on top of my class this time if it weren’t for that stupid little bastard…” your last words ended up as a whisper, eyes glazing to the side as you glared at nothing in particular.

“Stupid little what?”

“Nothing, nothing,” you waved your hand in the air, “Someone’s just distracting me from my studies, is all.”

At the mention of someone distracting your usually composed and unbothered self, your father straightened up in his seat, a large smile on his face that made him look younger than he really was. “Is it a guy? Do you finally have a boyfriend?”

“Ugh, dad, really, you’re the only father who’s so eager for his daughter to have a boyfriend. Shouldn’t you be more proud that, I don’t know, I’m pretty and smart? I don’t need a boyfriend or anything.”

Your father nodded, “True, you don’t need them, but trust me when I say life is going to get pretty lonely when you grow old and you’re all by yourself. It’s still better – and life is a lot happier – when you’ve got a stable supporting and loving figure in your life.”

“I have you for that.”

“And you always will,” he patted your hand gently across the table, “But a parent won’t always be there for their child, and if you’re still not prepared for the future or ready to stand on your own two feet, then that means I didn’t do a great job at raising you; that means I’ve failed as a parent. Tell me, have I failed? Have I raised my wonderful daughter to be so repulsed by the idea of love that she’s willingly closing her doors and locking herself away in isolation?”

“No…”

“I didn’t think so,” he grinned to himself, and you watched with a frown as his eyes crinkled in happiness. Your father was such the complete opposite of you; he was always so loving and open to everyone, while you were mopey and afraid of attachment.

“Don’t be too afraid to love, child. It’s one of the most wonderful things in this world – it’s a blessing – the absolute core of our being. Why do we exist if not to love?”

“Not everyone is a romantic like you, dad,” you sighed, “Plus…how is it so easy for you to finally find someone after Mom died? Isn’t she your soul mate?” you questioned, putting your fork and knife down as you looked your father in the eye. “I just can’t believe you’re getting married again.”

“It’s already been years since she passed away, Y/N. And yes, she is my soul mate, but that doesn’t mean I’m incapable of loving someone again. Our hearts aren’t limited like that, and your mother wouldn’t want me to keep mourning her when she’s resting in peace,” he gestured to the both of you after swallowing his food, “She would’ve wanted the both of us to be happy.”

At the mention of your passed mother, your shoulders deflated, and your eyes watered at the thought of her kind smile. You wished you could see that again.

“I miss her…”

“I know, child, I know,” your father smiled encouragingly, “I also know the reason you’re so afraid to love is because you’re scared they’ll end up leaving you too, like how your mom just slipped past our fingers like that, but it’s only her body that withered. She’s still with us, right in our hearts and in our memories.”

“You really do sound like a lovesick fool.”

“That’s because I am,” your father laughed with a slap to his knees. When his phone buzzed for his alarm, he quickly dabbed a towel on his lips, standing up to excuse himself. “Now, this lunch was lovely and I dearly missed you, but I need to go back to work. We doctors just never get a break. This is a life you have to prepare for if you want to follow my footsteps.”

“I won’t follow your footsteps – I’ll surpass you.”

“I’ll be waiting for that to happen then,” he announced proudly; pride bursting in his chest at how determined his daughter was. “Oh, and Y/N?”

“Yes?” You squinted at the mischievous look in his eyes, wary of what your cunning father had in mind this time.

“You won’t outsmart me. You better bring a boyfriend or at least introduce someone to me on the wedding – or else I’m pulling you out of the university hospital.”

“Wha – Dad, that’s not fair!”

“All is fair in love and war, child, you’ll learn soon.”

“Oh, I just hate men!”

You really did hate men.

Your final exam was tomorrow already and you’d lost count of the coffee and Red Bull you’ve inhaled today, all so you could study one last time for the test, but no, something – or rather someone – just had to get in your way.

“I’ve had enough,” you announced before slamming your door open; not hesitating as your fists came banging down on your neighbor’s door. “Hey! Keep it the fuck down – someone’s trying to study here! Seriously, man, is it really that hard for you to keep it in your pants for one night? This is what, the sixth woman you’ve had around the past four days? Don’t you get tired? Because I sure as hell am very tired of you!”

The moans and the sounds of bed creaking stopped. For a moment, you almost smirked to yourself when they fell silent.

If only you knew it would be that easy to shut them up, you would’ve done so long ago. You were about to turn back into your room when his door swung open, and you were met by his sweaty and muscular chest heaving up and down – either in anger or from his previous activities – you couldn’t tell.

Your throat felt dry as you peered at him under your lashes, almost afraid of the way he loomed over you. Thank goodness he found the time to wear pants, though, because had he been baby naked, you would’ve run for the hills already.

His dark eyes cut through yours as he seethed, “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I’m the one who wants to ask you that,” you were surprised to find your voice despite the way your pussy actually ached just by the sight of his chiseled body, but when you did, you forced yourself to stand up taller, refusing to back down from his gaze. “It’s literally three in the morning and you’re about to fuck a hole through my wall!”

“I thought you said you’d be crashing at your friends. What are you doing here?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t know I had to have your permission to come back home. Next time, I’ll give you a heads-up, good sir. And for your information, unlike you, I actually don’t like bothering the people around me so I came home. Now would you please kick her out and shut the fuck up for once?”

“Babe, are you coming back here or what?”

Red acrylic nails wound from his body out of nowhere, and your mouth fell open as you watched the naked woman press kisses on the blades of his shoulder. You were conflicted, torn between feeling jealous that she got to touch him like that because damn was he fine, but you also felt appalled your neighbor would be this type of person.

“Babe?” you repeated with a sarcastic laugh.

Stepping away from your neighbor’s tempting pecs, you waved to the stunning woman behind him. “Hi, I’m his neighbor, I don’t mean to be a cock block or anything but I’ve been a witness to his fuckboy ways for months now. If you think you’re special to him, I assure you, you’re not. Yesterday he was just banging two girls until the sunrise. If you’re really as sane as I hope you are, I suggest you skedaddle before this man feeds you with more lies. You’re not special, hun, he’s just going to fuck everything that walks on two legs.”

“Is that true?”

“Nadia, you know how this works—”

“I was literally just on the phone with you last night!” the woman named Nadia pushed him away, but because he was bigger, he didn’t budge. Nadia turned to you, her lipstick smudged and a suspicious white stain on the edge of her lips. You couldn’t even bring yourself to look down her head, and you and your neighbor both watched as she got dressed and left, hands up in the air. “Thank you for this. I should’ve known better than to waste time and money on him.”

You snickered as Nadia pressed on the elevator buttons, a scowl sent his way. Turning to him with pride swelling up in your chest, you smirked, “How does it feel—”

“Happy now?” he growled, his eyes so dark and slit into tiny cuts you took a step back, your heart pumping frantically for different reasons. You never thought he’d be this bothered for not being able to bust a nut. “Satisfied now, Y/N? Do you even realize what you’ve just done?”

“Uhm, yes,” you scoffed, matching his tone. “I just saved that poor girl’s life. Who else knows what you would’ve done and said to her. We don’t deserve to be looked down on and treated like this, you know.”

“Neither did I. I’m just doing my job.”

“Job? You don’t even have a job! You don’t even go to university for fuck’s sake – your apartment is rundown and smells like sour cunt and feet! Maybe you should even thank me because I’m trying to give you ideas on better things to do!”

“Yeah, and be like you?” he snapped, tugging at the strings of your hoodie until you fell a step forward. “Dressed in loose shirts to hide the fact you’ve got no tits and your ass is flatter than your back? Lying to her neighbor that she’ll crash somewhere but ends up waddling back home anyway because she’s always cooped up in her apartment studying to prove that she’s not as worthless as she is and that she doesn’t have a life or friends to begin with?” tears pooled at your eyes at his words, and you knew it hurt because it was true, but did he really have to say it that way?

However, his anger got the best of him, and he didn’t stop there. “I don’t want to be like you. I don’t want to skip meals and lose sleep studying for something I don’t care about because I don’t know anything else other than following daddy’s footsteps so he’d notice me more than his new bride. I’m happy with my life.”

“How did—”

“Like you said, the walls are thin. You’re not exactly so quiet to yourself, neighbor. It’s kind of pathetic you talk to the walls when you think I’m asleep because you’ve got no one else to talk to.”

Hands balled into fists at your side, you stood on your tiptoes to spit the words out. “You’re a terrible human being,” no matter how much you tried to exert dominance over him, your lips still quivered as you fought back the urge to cry. “Go fuck yourself.”

“You’re the one who needs to go fuck yourself and get laid,” he didn’t let you have another word as he slammed the door in your face, but you still heard him through the door anyway. “Uptight bitch.”

You were wrong.

Your neighbor wasn’t just difficult – he was completely impossible.

[Dad:] Don’t forget your date!

[You:] Dad…don’t push it.

[Dad:] I find it hard to believe my beautiful daughter can’t have one. Go out there and make some friends, Y/N, I know you isolate yourself too much. It doesn’t even have to be a boyfriend. You could date a girl for all I care. I just don’t want you to be too bored at the wedding. Bring a friend.

[You:] Fine, fine, okay.

[Dad:] But a boyfriend would still be better. Your old man isn’t getting any younger and I want grandkids in the future.

[You:] Dad!

[Dad:] love ya kid !

And so it was the turn of your events that had you groaning in your swiveling chair, the grip on your phone so tight you wouldn’t be surprised if you ended up breaking it. As if your week couldn’t get any more horrible with your neighbor’s hurtful words still living at the back of your mind, your father hadn’t stopped talking about you to his co-workers and his equally crazy mother that your grandmother didn’t waste time in calling you.

You loved your nan, you really did, but more often than not, she was much more of a pain in the ass than your father was. The old woman was ruthless, shooting you question by question on why her pretty granddaughter was still single, then came the demeaning comments of how you “weren’t living life to the fullest.”

Frustration eating away at you, you let out a silent scream.

The escort site blinked back at you mockingly, temptingly, as if to remind you that your problems could easily be solved with just a click. You chastised yourself for always having the need to solve problems fast and as easily as you could, because before you even realized what you were doing, your heart started beating a mile a minute as the other line kept ringing.

You ended up lying to your grandmother that yes, nan, I have a boyfriend, can I study for my exams now please, to which the pressing woman responded with, oh, finally! well, I won’t bother you anymore. study well, my dear, I can’t wait to see him!

Just thinking about how she would react if you came alone at your father’s wedding had you breaking out in a sweat, and you chewed at your nails while waiting for the site to pick up.

You were truly desperate now, so much so that you were actually calling a rental boy site.

“Good afternoon, thank you for calling Kamo Escorts! I’m Ijichi, here to assist you. What can I help you with?”

You held back a really painful cringe, biting the insides of your cheek as you got your heart to calm down. “Uhm, yeah…so this is like my first time c-calling a site like this and I don’t know what to do but…yeah.”

“I see, we get new callers too. Would you like a guide?”

“Yes, please, that’d be great thank you.”

“Kamo Escorts is all about, well, as you can see on our webpage – we have men and even women you can hire to escort you on special events. We mostly cater to clients who only need a pretty face to dangle off their arm for social company or even care, or whatever reasons the client may have and the relationship is purely business and professional, but in some cases, the escorts may have sex with the client too under the condition they are paid more.”

The gasp that left your lips was barely stifled, and you furrowed your brows at the implication. “Wh-what, so that’s like a real thing? Isn’t this…?”

Ijichi chuckled from the other line, almost as if he’d been asked this question many times before. “In a way, it is, which is why Kamo Escorts is commercially advertised for purely social company only. You may, however, negotiate with your escort if you would like more services, but we do require that you keep our escorts’ dignity and not look down on them. The service we provide may not be your typical honorable one, but we are dedicated and equally eager to be of service to this society. Should we find that you’re dehumanizing or harassing our escort, we won’t hesitate to…take some action,” the light warning of his tone didn’t go unnoticed by you, and Ijichi took note of your hesitant silence. “Would you still like to proceed?”

“Ye-yeah, I didn’t want the sex anyway.”

“Very well, then. What event are we looking for?”

“It’s for a relative’s wedding,” you supplied, “I need a date.”

“Any preference in escorts? Male, female, tall, short, sociable or introverted?”

Your eyes widened, your back flattening against your chair. “Oh, wow, so this is like a Build-A-Bear, okay, wait,” you chewed your nails again, racking up on your mind on who or what exactly you liked. “My ideal guy is…someone tall, and has pretty broad shoulders…I think I prefer a more introverted one too because people with too much energy sort of drains me…and someone caring and attentive, yes. Handsome too – but if that’s too much to ask for then—”

“It’s okay, Miss. I assure you all our escorts are definitely blessed in the gene department.”

At his confidence, you scrunched your nose and made yourself small on your chair. “Okay, but now that you say it, if he’s too handsome then I’m going to look like a potato next to him.”

“We’ll find someone compatible for you; we always never fail to please our clients. We’ll be able to match you with a more suitable escort if you’re more descriptive with what you want.”

“Okay, okay,” you continued, “Oh, and I like guys with long hair too, but really, anything is fine. I just want someone to effortlessly pretend they’re enamored after just one date and that they’re very glad to be there with me on the wedding. It’s even better if they’re introverted but can communicate well and isn’t shy at all. My relatives are kind of…freaky.”

Freaky couldn’t even begin to describe the chaos of your relatives.

In fact, had you not been paying for this service, you would’ve almost felt bad for the guy. He had no idea what he had coming for him – but then again, neither did you.

“I think we’ve got just the perfect guy for you,” Ijichi answered after a beat, “May I ask when is this event and how long you’d like to book the escort service for?”

“The event is in two weeks. I don’t need to meet him before the wedding because I’m very busy with exams, so I hope this guy can just act really well. As for the duration…I think just one day is enough. After the wedding, I’m coming right back home.”

“Convenient then,” he mused to himself, and you heard slight clicking from his side. “Let’s see…someone introverted and able to communicate well…definitely not Satoru, and his entirely booked by sugar mommies too…” Ijichi whispered to himself, followed by a slight humorous snort. “One last question: would you like someone older, younger, or the same age as you?”

“I’m in uni – I’d be more comfortable if they were closer to my age.”

“Oh, perfect, his schedule is oddly open for the whole month. Wonder what happened, he’s barely had free slots before…” the man was speaking to himself again, and you sat there pouting, even more dumbfounded at how this whole process worked.

Ijichi talked about this escort service and guided you so easily you almost couldn’t believe that it was as…simple as that. You didn’t know what you were expecting, but deep down in your mind, you were waiting for something fishy or weird to happen.

“I found someone for you. He’s one of our best escorts and I believe he’ll be great for this event. However, due to privacy issues, the disclosure of contacts and personal information can only happen once the escort agrees to this service. We’ll shortly get back to you if he’s up for the job. If not, I’ll find you another one quickly; you’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“Okay, thank you so much!”

“It’s our pleasure. Thank you for contacting Kamo Escorts – we hope to see you again!”

Once the call ended, you fell back on your bed with a sigh. Your neighbor wasn’t around the whole day, leaving you in peace and silence, and you took advantage of the rare quietness by pulling out a book. Hours passed, and you were nearly finished with half the textbook, fingers slightly numb from practicing sutures over and over again when your phone lit up with a text.

It came from an unknown number, but the words were loud and clear. Hey, this is Choso, I’ll be your escort for the wedding. Please text me here for the details and what else you expect from my service. I’m only a text and call away, please don’t hesitate to ask me for anything else.

You blinked at your phone, unsure of how to process the whole thing.

So it was official now – you rented an escort and you had a date for the event. Quite frankly, you were kind of expecting that escorts would be a lot more…flirtatious or even eager to please, but this Choso guy sounded too formal for you to picture yourself having this stranger be a good company for your event. Ijichi sounded so sure though that you no longer questioned it; smiling instead now that you’ve finally solved one of your problems.

Life felt a lot easier.

At around four in the morning, you were too worn out to keep going. Your exam was in the afternoon so you still had plenty of time to sleep, your stomach grumbled, prompting you to leave your unit to get some snacks.

Keys in hand and feet cold in your socks, you locked your door, halting in your steps when you saw your neighbor. Different from his usual comfortable clothing, he was dressed in a formal white shirt, sleeves rolled up to his elbows and his large, masculine hands coming up to loosen his tie. He wasn’t aware of your presence, almost blindly walking to his door and sighing. You didn’t miss the fact his shoulders were slumped, and he looked absolutely worn out.

For a moment, you actually felt worried, until you remembered what he said to you.

“What, no pussy to fuck tonight?”

He froze in front of his door for a moment, slightly tilting back to see your aggravated stance. Upon seeing it was just you, he shook his head and turned back to unlock his door. “No thanks to you.”

“Aw, did I ruin your reputation?” you mocked sarcastically, “I’m surprised people aren’t smart enough to pick up the smell of women’s perfume on you already. Seriously, are people that desperate for touch?” It was ironic; you’d never admit it, but you weren’t any better than them. You were equally desperate to be touched despite your aversion to romantic relationships, but he didn’t need to know that.

“It’s normal when you’re someone people are naturally attracted to. Not that you’d get it, of course, because it’s clear you don’t get some.”

“At least my apartment doesn’t smell like pussy.”

“At least I don’t masturbate every night then pass out after one weak orgasm.”

Your cheeks burned at his offhanded comment, and even with his back turned to you, you could see the slight smile tugging at his cheeks. He must’ve felt so cocky, thinking that he’d defeated you, so you blurted out the most intelligent thing possible: “How dare you!” while grabbing onto his shoulders to make him face you. “Look me in the eye and take that back!”

“Whatever you’re planning,” he crooned, head tilted to the side and making strands of his bangs fall over his eyes. He looked absolutely handsome under the flickering lights of the hallway in that moment, and you hated how you weren’t able to take your hands off of his strong shoulders, his masculine and spicy perfume clouding your mind. “It’s not going to work. Surprise surprise, but you’re not as cute as you think you are.”

Your eyes burned with fire, the nerves in your body so closing to popping. He infuriated you so much. “And you’re not as sexy as you believe you are!”

“Oh, yeah?” The positions are suddenly switched as he cornered you beside his doorframe, both of his arms planted beside your head. Because he was taller, he had to lean down to look you in the eye, his warm, minty breath brushing over your lips. You stared at him with wide eyes, fingers raking over the wall in a silent attempt to flee. Upon seeing your pursed lips, he laughed.

“Then why are you so shaky? Do I make you nervous?” his head dipped down, his lips grazing the shell of your ear. “Say…you only pretend to hate me, but you actually wish it was you I’m fucking every night, don’t you? Tell me…do you touch yourself when you hear me eating someone out?”

“I-I’m not—”

Before you could combust under his gaze, he pulled himself away from you, a satisfied smirk on his face at your flustered state. He chuckled lowly, keys spinning on his thick finger. “I was just teasing you, princess. No need to get so worked up.”

“I never want you near me again!”

He raised both brows as if to challenge you, and you knew from the glint in his eyes he was up to no good. “Princess, you jumped on me first.”

“I didn’t!” You shouted, immediately slapping your palm over your lips after realizing people were sleeping. He snickered at your reactions, and you pushed past him back to your unit, suddenly losing the appetite to get your precious snacks. “God, I hate you so much.”

“Believe me, the feeling is mutual.”

Difficult. Unbelievable. Complicated. Idiotic. Nothing was ever easy with him.

“Would you stop fidgeting?” your father scolded from his chair, his body barely moving as the stylists fixed his hair and makeup, but his eyes glared at you from the mirror. “You’re a lot more nervous than I am, and it’s my wedding.”

“Sorry, I can’t help it.”

Your father sighed to himself, standing up after they were done with him. He checked his appearance in the mirror for a while, nodding to himself in satisfaction. It was still a little surreal that he was going to get married again, to a woman half his age of all people, but he was happy, and his bride seemed to really love him too, so you no longer questioned your father’s decisions. He was an adult, anyway, he could make his own decisions.

“You’re waiting for your boyfriend, you say?”

“Yeah.”

“What’s he like?”

You stiffened at the question. Not wanting your sharp-eyed father to pick up on the smallest cues, you lied through your teeth despite not having any idea on who or what kind of person the escort was.

Other than discussing details of how you two supposedly met, conversations had been crisp and short. You were lucky that the escort seemed to be nice and smart enough to not always ask you to explain everything, and he was crisp and curt in his texts too. No flirty or suggestive messages, not even a single emoji. He seemed a little stiff, and while you worried if you could fake chemistry with someone who seemed like a wall, you were also assured by the fact he wasn’t some creep.

“Nice. He’s sweet. You’ll like him.”

“And when did you meet him?”

“Dad, do I have to tell this story all over again?” you groaned, “We met after exams, he goes to a different uni and he studies law—”

“Law. Impressive.”

“Of course you’re impressed,” you rolled your eyes. Coming from a family of doctors and engineers, your father, and pretty much everyone else in the family, also expected that you’d date someone who was equally intelligent and had enough connections in different industries at least. It just so happened you were really lucky your escort also really did study law for a bit before he became an escort; a detail you never got enough explanation for. “He’ll be here anytime soon. Just you wait.”

In reality, you were the one who couldn’t wait.

You were excited and nervous at the same time to see this mysterious escort, and you were in the middle of talking to your father and his bride when someone called you.

“Y/N?”

You turned around with a bright grin. That must be him! You clasped at the hems of your dress so you could meet this mysterious, rigid man properly, but the moment your eyes met his equally startled gaze, you choked on your own breath. “Y-you—”

Choso stood before you; handsome as ever in his suit and tie, his iconic twin tails still there. How ever would your father believe you now that he was a lawyer, especially with his messy hair and face tattoo? You loved it and found it sexy on him, no denying that, but your father was a little bit more traditional. But that aside, it was Choso?!

His professionalism arose and he regained his composure quicker than you did, the smile on his face so natural and alluring even you almost fell for it.

Choso wrapped an arm around your waist before kissing you on the cheek, and the skin felt extremely hot under his lips. You couldn’t move, couldn’t even speak, because Choso was pressed flush against you, and he looked at you with stars shining in his eyes you didn’t know whether to be flattered or afraid.

Maybe a fucked up mix of both.

“I’m sorry I’m late. Traffic was bad,” he explained with a small smile on his lips, and he looked so handsome and smelled so good in that moment you were left gaping at him as he bowed to your father, arm politely extended. “You must be Y/N’s father. It’s very nice to meet you sir. I’m her boyfriend, Choso.”

To your surprise, your father eagerly shook his hand with the brightest grin he’d worn the whole night before he faced you with a laugh. “No way,” he beamed, gesturing to Choso. “He’s your boyfriend? You managed to snag this fine man?”

“Dad!” your ears burned with embarrassment. Choso only laughed; making you painfully aware of his large, warm hand resting at the small of your back.

“I heard you’re a lawyer, son?”

“Yes, sir.”

Your father nodded in approval, the two exchanging over words about what his plans were for the future and how his studies were going. You stood there with a pounding heart, fearful that Choso could fuck up any moment, but he was so effortless and easy going. Had you not been the one paying him, you would’ve been fooled too.

So this was the life of an escort.

“So how much did my daughter pay you?”

“Dad, I didn’t—”

“I mean, there’s no way she actually charmed you with her non-existent social skills. My daughter here can’t even talk to someone and look them in the eye, much less ask someone out, so how did this happen?”

Choso laughed at your father’s lighthearted comment, saving the day for what seemed like the hundredth time already. “I approached her first, sir. We were both eating in this small diner and it was cramped, so we shared tables and started conversation,” Suddenly, his grip tightened on you as he pulled you closer, your ear now resting above the lulling and steady beating of his heart. How was he so calm?

He lightly squeezed your hip and it had you freezing under his touch, stiffening even more when he looked down at you so adoringly. “Guess it went downhill from there.” God, you had no idea who this man was.

“Really? What did you guys talk about?”

Choso opened his mouth to speak, but it was there, that damned glint on those dark eyes again that you clutched at his bicep. He may be damn good at this job, but knowing Choso, he was enjoying this way too much.

Anything you couldn’t predict or control properly was a huge no in your game, and you pulled Choso away before he could say something downright humiliating.

“Dad, just go focus on your wedding. I want to spend time with my boyfriend, okay?” You couldn’t even begin to fathom the inward cringe upon your words, the feeling only worsening when Choso fought back a laugh masked with a cough. Before your father could say anything else, you dragged Choso rather harshly, but he didn’t mind; he followed you obediently. “Come with me. I need to talk to you,” You didn’t stop until you were both alone in a desolated corner, and finally, you hissed at him. “What are you doing here?!”

“I should be asking you the same thing – but it turns out you’re my client.”

“Client? So you really are my escort?”

“Yes, I am.”

“So those women…”

“All my clients,” he confirmed your thoughts. “I assure you they knew what they were getting into. In fact, they were the ones who asked for that special service that caused you to lose your sleep every night. That woman the other day was just pissed because she booked me for three days, but I lied that I was available until the duration she wanted when I wasn’t.”

“You mean you were still working an escort for somebody else?”

He shrugged. “Pretty much.”

“Why did you lie then?”

“It’s more money,” Choso stared down at his hands before his eyes flitted back up to yours, his face unreadable. “I’m saving up so I can move somewhere else. Our apartment isn’t exactly the most ideal considering my profession. I need to find someplace quieter with thicker walls this time,” he smiled, “That way, I’ll no longer bother my sweet neighbor,” your lips felt dry at his words, your tongue darting out to lick at them while Choso scrutinized you under his gaze.

“I have to admit though – you asking for escort service is the last thing I’d ever imagine you doing. Not that I’m complaining since it’s still money in my pocket, but you’re not the most pleasing company to be with.”

“Oh, you bet, Choso. Had I known you were going to be my escort, I would’ve declined long ago,” you groaned, your head dropping in your hands. “What was Ijichi thinking when he said I would be compatible with you?”

“You’re not,” he stated, “But I am compatible with you – as I am with pretty much everyone else. I’m one of the best escorts, and soon you’ll see why.”

You didn’t understand what he meant by then, but it seemed Choso was quite eager to show his skills off when he dragged you back inside the reception event. The whole time, you couldn’t pay attention to anything or anyone else other than Choso. It still felt hard to believe that the whole time, he really was doing his job, and upon seeing how easily he had people believing you two were an item despite you just standing silently beside him, you felt guilty that you disrupted his “work” like that.

Guilt gnawed at you as Choso made everyone laugh, and soon your relatives were cooing, praising you and congratulating you that you were “happy” now.

Back then, you always looked down on him and even called him a mere fuckboy, but Choso was so much more than that. He was intelligent; his past as a lawyer proved that, and whatever happened that caused him to work in this industry kept lingering in your mind.

There was no denying it now.

You respected this man – admired him even.

“And now it’s time to join the newly married couple on the dance floor! Come on, people, bring your dates up here for a twirl!”

You remained planted in your seat, too comfortable with Choso’s jacket draped around your bare shoulders. You’d lost count of how many times your head ducked down for the lack of sleep, and as much as you loved your dad, you wanted nothing more than to go home and rest.

Choso offered his hand to yours, a teasing smile on his face. He wriggled his eyebrows up and down, and he looked so utterly ridiculous that you couldn’t believe the boring man you were texting was the same infuriating yet undeniably attractive bastard who was your neighbor was the same fun. The world is very small, it seemed, and you weren’t sure whether you were brave enough to venture these strange places and feelings.

“Uh-uh. No. I’m not dancing.”

“Two left feet?”

“No, I’m wearing heels. My feet hurts.”

“Then take it off.”

“And get my feet dirty?” you scoffed. As if to prove your point, you snuggled deeper into his jacket that smelled heavenly like him, closing your eyes as you pretended to sleep. “Sitting here isn’t so bad. Plus, look at them, all staring at each other with goo-goo eyes. It’s revolting,” you shuddered.

Through the sickeningly romantic music playing in the background, Choso fell silent. You cracked an eye open, frowning when Choso studied each of your features carefully. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“You seem to hate the idea of love.”

“Because it’s pointless.”

Choso narrowed his eyes at your answer, brows bunching up at the way your shoulders squared to keep yourself away. Then, he stood up and sighed, offering his hand to you once more.

“I won’t really ask you to explain why, because frankly, I don’t care,” you stared at his large palms for a few seconds. There must be a ghost possessing your body because you looped your fingers through his and allowed him to guide you on the dance floor despite your mind’s protests, and soon, Choso’s eyes were all over you. “But if you don’t want your money to go down the drain and you really want to convince everyone, I suggest you forget about that mindset for just a few more hours,” his voice dropped down to a low whisper, his forehead pressed to yours. His eyes turned solemn, his hand on your waist gentle. “Dance with me. Let’s show them how madly in love we are with each other.”

“We met just last week, remember?”

“Love at first sight, princess,” Choso kissed your forehead, sending your heart thumping and running to another dimension. Oddly enough, you didn’t mind, and your hands travelled from his strong arms to his broad shoulders instinctively. “Take your heels off. You can step on my feet and I’ll dance for us both. Just put your arms around my neck – yes just like that,” he nodded with a smile when your fingertips nervously played with his hair, and Choso began to dance you both in time with the music. “Are you good?”

“I don’t like this lack of space between us.”

Choso smirked, “Why, do I get you all hot and bothered?”

“Jesus, Choso, you can’t be serious for a minute, huh?”

“It’s kind of hard to be serious when you’re so flustered and adorable right now,” you pulled at his hair in response, but of course, he wasn’t really hurt.

“Look at me,” he demanded, but you refused, keeping your gaze planted on your bare feet on top of his again. “Hey. I said look at me,” he tilted your chin up until you’re forced to be like prey under his gaze, his breath tickling the bow of your lips. “I am your escort for tonight – and I humbly ask that you do your part as my client so I can perform my job well. I need you to look into my eyes and pretend you’re in love with me.”

“I don’t want to fall in love with anyone,” you suddenly admitted, “I’m scared.”

“You don’t have to be,” he replied, softly this time, and his hands ran down tenderly to your hips to pull you closer to him. “I’ll be there to catch you.”

You couldn’t remember who leaned in first. The only thing you remembered was that the music faded in the background when you kissed him – or maybe he kissed you – fuck, you didn’t really remember. Eventually, the kiss grew too heated, his hands squeezing your waist while you moan at the taste of chocolate and wine on his expert tongue.

Choso easily read your mind and swooped you away from the crowd, the both of you stumbling until you made it out to the venue and onto the beach.

The salty air kissed your skin while Choso carried you bridal style, arms looped around his neck while he kept moving his lips above yours. He was laughing through the kiss with how messy and eager you were, tugging at his shirt to encourage him to unbutton it. Choso set you both down on the darker, isolated part of the beach where nothing but the sound of waves lapping against one another could be heard with your breathless pants and his chuckles.

You were lying on his jacket, dress bunched up to your chest while your legs were spread wide open for him. “Ch-Choso,” you choked out when his tongue ran flat across your slick folds, his hands keeping your hips pinned down to the sand. “I-I, please.”

“I got you, princess,” was all he said before he completely dived into your heat, his sharp nose brushing into your cunt.

It didn’t take long until you were spasming in his hold, legs closing around his head. Choso groaned into your pussy, a finger working its way inside your sopping cunt while he licks and slurps your arousal like it was fucking water. Now you understood why those girls always lost their mind – Choso was a fucking expert when it came to worshipping pussy.

Choso pulled his fingers out of you, making you whine at the sudden emptiness, but he was kind, eager to please you that he immediately replaced it with his tongue.

You cried out when you felt his tongue entering your hole, one thumb pulling the hood of your lips up to reveal your sensitive pearl. Choso rubbed your clit fervently, his other hand reaching up to squeeze and tug at your breasts while he drank your juices dripping down his tongue as if you would be his last meal – and he honestly wished you were, because you tasted like heaven on him and he wanted more.

Once he felt you clamping down on his tongue so tightly he struggled to retrieve his warm muscle back, he helped you reach your high by pinching your clit. You moaned out his name, the sound sending blood straight down his cock, and he groaned into your pussy the moment you grinded on his face as you relaxed from your orgasm.

Choso didn’t give you the chance to recover from your orgasm, pulling you up to his lap before he’s kissing you again. You moaned when you tasted yourself on his tongue, his face and cheeks sweet from your arousal and cum.

You should be ashamed, but you couldn’t find a single bone in your body that felt shy right now. Choso was right – there was no point in being shameful when it came to your pleasure.

The kiss was sloppy, more tongue than lips and teeth clashing onto another. Choso grinded you on his hardened erection in search of your heat that would bring him relief, but he slowed down and pulled away from you, a string of saliva connected from your lips. He wanted you – wanted to fuck you so badly – so he searched your eyes for the answer when you aligned the tip of his cock to your entrance. “Is this okay? Are you sure with this?”

“Yeah,” you gritted your teeth when his tip entered your tight cunt, your walls sucking him in greedily already. Choso’s head dropped down to your shoulder, his teeth sinking down to your shoulder. You slowly sat down on his thick length, but then froze before he could bottom out. “Wait, no, I’m broke! I can’t pay for your extra services!”

“It’s free for you, princess,” he rasped out, “Now sit on my lap so I can feel you around me already.”

“Do you always have to be so vulgar?”

Through the pleasure that had his abs rippling, Choso managed a laugh. “You might want to get used to it.”

“Why would I?” you breathed out, eyes shutting tight once he fully slid into you. He allowed you to get used to the sudden stretch; it had been too long since you’ve been touched this way that you were impossibly tight around him right now. Your chest rose and fall with each faltering breath, your nails running down his back when Choso gave a deep, experimental thrust that immediately hits your sweet spot.

You moaned, cheek resting on his shoulder as Choso set the pace, squeezing your ass as he bounced you up and down his cock. “You’re gone after this. Once this contract is over, you’re moving away and I won’t get to see you anymore. I-I won’t lose sleep anymore after hearing you fuck all those women and gosh, I hate you so much, you know that?”

“I hated you too,” he groaned through your skin, “Or at least, that’s what I told myself so I wouldn’t get hurt.”

“Hurt? I would never hurt you,” Really, you praised yourself for still being able to form coherent sentences even after Choso kept fucking into you.

“I’m an escort, princess, I’m everybody’s and nobody’s at the same time,” he explained almost angrily, and his lips zealously sucked love bites to the sensitive flesh of your neck, “Even if you won’t hurt me, we’re bound to crash and burn at some point. This is why we’re not allowed to get attached to anyone,” his lips brushed over her collarbone, his canines dragging along to make red marks. “Why we’re not allowed to fall,” he squeezed her breast in the palm of his hand, twisting the peaked nipple until you whined, hips bucking deeper into his cock. “Why we’re not allowed to love.”

“I-I don’t understand.”

“I’ve always liked you,” he laughed through the pleasure, holding your hips down so he could drive his cock deeper into you. Yes, he was selfish, yes, he was frustrated – and his feelings burst through the way Choso powered into you. You fell limp in his arms and he easily caught you like he always did, his eyes blown wide as he stared right into your eyes, his dick still pummeling through your gummy walls.

Choso inhaled sharply when you clenched down on him, an elongated moan spilling past your lips. “I liked you the moment you moved in and you fell flat on your face before you could greet me.”

“Shut up, don’t remind me of that!” you raked your nails down his back hard enough to draw blood, and Choso concealed the pain with light chuckle, the pain only prompting him to absolutely use you. “You’re seriously bringing it up now when you’re – ah, fuck – b-buried in me?”

Choso tugged at one of your legs and wrapped it around his waist, the sudden change of angle had you pressing down deeper into him. It felt like you were sinking closer and closer to his cock, the tip of his dick kissing your cervix until you’re crying out in his arms, scratches evident on his back.

“For now,” he breathed out, “I want to at least be selfish enough to want you now, just for now if fate won’t still allow it.”

“W-we can try,” you said in your lust-filled gaze, lips crashing down messily to his while you bounced on him, your hips slamming down at the same to meet his thrusts. “It’s not going to be easy, but we can try, right?” You cupped his face, surprised with the sudden vulnerability from his hooded eyes, looking so innocent and beautiful as if he wasn’t painting your insides white.

“Okay,” he nodded, brows pinching together. And that was all the both of you needed before Choso sank his fangs down the column of your neck to hold on his low groans; your head thrown back as you both drown in the pleasure of being with one another.

In the blink of an eye, all tenderness is Choso’s touches replaced by the hunger in his eyes and the power of his lust-filled thrusts. You were a moaning mess by the time your hips sit flat on his pelvic bone and his balls brush on your ass from how deep he was hitting you, and you felt his teeth nibble at the side of your breasts again as he warned, “But for now, I’m not going to go easy on you – not when I’ve wanted you for so long and I’ve been so hard for you these all time.”

And you allowed him. Because nothing was ever easy with Choso, but for him, you’d try pushing through hell and back.

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

Roxy's Record Store (Part 2)

WC: 8.1K

TW: Verbal abuse

Read Part 1

“So you and Harry called a truce?” Sarah asked after taking a sip of her pellegrino and Y/N smiled.

“Yeah, I think so?” Y/N said.

“I hope so… you guys are insufferable.” She whined, “No offense.” She added quickly and Y/N just chuckled.

“I mean he’s just… so annoying sometimes. I try and he just…likes to push my buttons.”

“Hopefully not anymore. He’s pretty chuffed about the shoutout you gave him on the podcast.” Sarah informed before slipping some of her salad into her mouth and Y/N giggled.

“What the fuck is that?”

“Slang for like pleased or content, but like in a cuter way.”

“Giddy?” Y/N said and Sarah shook her head.

“Chuffed sounds better.” She responded. Y/N couldn’t help but smile. She had tried to be neutral or at least nice to Harry and it seemed that he always had a bad reaction to it, hopefully that was over now. “So Roxy’s turns four next weekend and Harry’s planning this like live music thing over Friday night. It’s gonna be like a fund raiser for some charity and obvs, promo for the shop…”

“Oh really? That sounds nice.”

“Yeah, he said he was gonna send official invitations but I haven’t received anything yet.” Sarah mumbled as she eyed over the menu once more. Y/N glanced at her suspiciously.

“You’re quite peckish today.” She commented and Sarah glanced up.

“The last few days actually, might be m’period… I think we hang out too much.” Sarah mumbled and Y/N giggled. She tended to always have snacks or always save room for dessert, especially when she was extra hormonal. If their cycles ended up merging it wouldn't actually be such an insane thing. Y/N just felt sorry for Sarah because her hormones tended to be completely extreme when she was getting close.

"I'm sorry for doing this to you." she said and Sarah just laughed.

********

The week had flown by and Y/N was currently in the über on her way to Roxy’s for the birthday/charity event. She was wearing the cutest set! Yes, she was a little late, but since when did she shy away from looking her best. As soon as she arrived she went to look for her friends. She greeted them each happily and was told that Harry was wandering around playing host. The music was good and the vibe was amazing. Soon she was heading over to the little drinks area with Niall, ordering herself a whiskey and ginger ale and heading off to explore the event some more.

“You look good!” Y/N complimented Niall.

“Thanks, I decided I should wear something other than a t-shirt and jeans.” He chuckled and Y/N did as well.

“Comfort is key though.” She reminded.

“Oh, you’re one to talk… you’re always in some boujee outfit.” He laughed.

“It’s my comfortable.” She shrugged and he chuckled.

“You look good too, I mean y’always do…” he said and she smiled.

“Thanks.” She felt a little nervous because was Niall cute, yes! But she wasn’t sure if he into her or if they just got along really well. Everyone was having a great time and as the event went on they had more drinks and cupcakes and it was just a fun vibe.

“Oh my god, this is a great song! We need to go dance!” Niall said and Y/N giggled.

“I can’t! I’m so bad!”

“I’ll show you, c’mon.” He convinced and she squealed as he pulled her along by the hand and into the little crowd that was bopping along before the little makeshift stage. Last Nite by the Strokes was being covered wonderfully as they danced like there was no tomorrow. He was leading her and spinning her around to the fun and upbeat song. When it came to an end the band thanked everyone for the chance to perform that night and they clapped along with everyone and they were giggling as he was pulling her towards the drinks because she needed a water. She was mid-drink when Piledriver Waltz sounded over the speakers.

“Oh my god…” she said looking towards him, “This is one of my favorites.”

“Me too!” He smiled and she bit down on her lip as he pulled her back out towards the people that were still dancing in the empty space.

*******

“Oh my god, look at them!” Sarah cooed to Mitch and Harry. They both turned to the other side of the room and saw Niall and Y/N dancing and singing along to the Piledriver Waltz with so much gusto.

Harry doesn’t know why watching their faces so close together made his heart twist with a little pain. She looked like she was having the time of her life out there. He had never seen her so relaxed and on top of that she looked absolutely breathtaking. He watched as their lips nearly touched as they sang along and then it just happened. He saw her lean in further and attach her lips to Niall’s and then they were kissing as the guitar crooned out a beautifully tragic melody as the song winded down. He felt jealousy boiling in his veins as they pulled apart, giggling into the minimal space between them.

******

“Sorry.” Y/N giggled, it was a good sign he was giggling as well, “Don’t know what came over me.”

“S’alright, we had a moment, yeah?” He assured and she nodded, feeling a lot better now that the adrenaline from her courage started to subside. He just smiled at her, assuring her that it was OK.

The last time they had made out it had been part of suck and blow. Niall was a great kisser and she found herself thinking that she wouldn’t mind if this happened again. As the music stopped they clapped along with everyone else. After a few moments they were heading back to where their friends had been and Sarah made eyes with her that she just signaled for her to stop and Sarah just grinned.

“This has been great.” Niall said to Harry who just nodded and smiled, “I am getting hungry though.” He said and Sarah nodded in agreement.

“Same. Maybe like a burger?”

“You read my mind!” Niall said excitedly. “What do you guys say?” He asked the rest of the group who just nodded along.

“Figure out the plan and I’ll meet you all there, I need close out the event.” Harry said and every moved to towards the exit. Just as Y/N was stepping out of the shop she felt someone touch her shoulder.

“You’re the girl from Soundtrack to our lives, right?” Someone asked and she nodded with a smile, “I’m a huge fan!” The woman and her friend smiled excitedly. She started talking about how she was a music technology major and enjoyed the episodes where they would get into the production parts of albums.

“Pardon.” Niall interrupted the girl, “I’ll wait in the car.” He said, a look of urgency on his face. Niall did not mess around when it came to food and Y/N smiled.

“S’alright. I’ll catch a ride with Harry. You go ahead.” She assured and he nodded before hurrying off.

“Wait… you know Harry? Like the owner?” The girl asked and Y/N nodded. The girl was just thrilled and asking so many questions and was genuinely curious about the craft and about the in’s and outs of the industry. About 10 minutes later they heard Harry announce the closing of the event and thanked everyone for coming and soon enough people started filtering out steadily. The girls she had been talking to soon saw their friends and said goodbye, but not without getting a picture and hug from Y/N first. Soon enough she wandered back inside and heard a “We’re closed!” From behind the checkout counter.

“S’just me!” Y/N announced as she turned the lock on the front door and flipped the sign around to read the correct status.

“Oh, what’re you doing here?” He asked as he made himself seen holding a big black trash bag and Y/N walked over towards him, picking up left behind cups and napkins on her way.

“Some girls were talking to me as I was leaving and I just stayed behind to chat with them. Some college kids, they were sweet.” She said as she let them fall into the bag Harry held open for her.

“Thanks.”

“Yeah.” She smiled lightly before letting her teeth bite into her lip as she turned around to help clear up a bit more, “Tonight was really cool. I had fun.” She said as she walked over to him again and dropped a few cups into the bag.

“Oh, I saw…” he chuckled and she shook her head bashfully. “Don’t get all shy about it now!” He teased.

“That was nothing. We just had a moment… the right music, the right vibe… could’ve been anyone.” She shrugged as she watched him tie-off the bag with the red strings looping out from it.

“Anyone, huh?”

“Yeah. Even you!” She teased and he chuckled despite the fluttering in his tummy as his mind conjured up an image of them on the dance floor instead of Niall, “You seem like you’d be a good kisser.” She said as she hopped to sit on one of the tables along the wall that she had cleared up. He chuckled nervously.

“How would that even be a thing you determine?” He asked and she giggled.

“Well first off you have nice teeth and I can tell you have good hygiene, that’s a huge one!” She said and he chuckled, “But also you’re very like… adaptable. You need to be adaptable to be a good kisser. Like just go with it, you know?” “Yeah, I guess that makes sense…does that mean you’re a bad kisser?” He teased with a grin and she scoffed, making him laugh.

“I’m adaptable!” She defended through a laugh and he chuckled.

“Sure you are…” he joked.

“Whatever…” she whined, “Are we leaving soon?”

“Yeah, we can go. Ughh cleaning all this is gonna be a bitch. Gonna have to come early tomorrow.” He complained and she hopped off her seat on the table, noticing his phone was there and picking it up for him.

“I’m sure it’ll be OK.” She explained, “The girls I was talking with seemed to be sweet on you.” She said as they walked towards the back entrance.

“Yeah?” He grinned.

“Mhmm. We’re gonna have to stop warding off the suitors pretty soon.” She joked and he chuckled.

“Yeah, OK…” Harry was a pretty modest guy when push came to shove. He got a little shy, which was extremely endearing. Right off the bat he came off as aloof and even a little cocky, but as she began to experience him a little more she saw that he was quite a lovely person. As they headed down the dark hallway towards the back entrance. “Oh shoot, I forgot my phone.” He said as he patted at his pockets.

“Oh, here. You left if on the table.” She said holding it up for him. He looked at her for a moment before taking it.

“Thank you.”

“Yeah, no problem.” She hummed with a smile as they headed out of the backdoor. She was a little shocked when he opened up her door to the car before letting her settle in and closing it and then heading over to his side. He climbed in and started the car. Immediately Y/N heard Fleetwood Mac play over the speakers and smiled as she heard “Silver Springs”, “Such a good song.” She hummed as she opened up her message from Niall. She hadn’t even noticed that he was just staring at her, “Mmmm, they’re at Burger She Wrote on Beverly and Vista.” She said turning to him quickly and noticing he was just looking at her, “Did you forget something else?” She asked with a smile and he sniggered nervously before clearing his throat.

“Umm…no. No.” He said and she smiled, “I just umm…” he squeezed his eyes shut for a second before looking right at her and leaning over to her side. His hand came up and held her face gently as he leaned in further until there was a sliver of space between them.

“Harry, what’re you doing?” She breathed out nervously, her lips skimming his own as she spoke.

“You��re not really going with the flow…” he said quietly and she smiled before closing the small gap between them. He smiled against her lips and continued with moving his lips against hers in slow and gentle motions. Her lips were soft and sweet against his own, they were moving perfectly with his, following his lead. She started pressing herself closer to the center console to reach him better when her phone started ringing loudly, startling them both apart. It was Sarah. She answered it with shaky hands and put it on speaker.

“Hello?”

“Where are you guys? We’re about to get seated.” She explained.

“We were just cleaning up the shop a bit, we’ll be there in 10.” Harry answered for Y/N.

“OK, hurry.”

“Yeah. See you soon.”

“See ya’!” She said before hanging up.

“Sorry for just…springing that on you.” He shook his head in slight embarrassment, but still not moving away.

“It’s OK.” She said timidly, “I mean… I was right, though, baby. You are a good kisser. So…at least there’s that.” She sniggered nervously and he did as well. Did she call him “baby”? Why did he want her to do it again?

“Ummm, thank you. You too.” He smiled, bringing his hand back to scratch his neck.

“Thanks.” She laughed a bit.

“So… we should probably go.” He said settling back into his seat and she giggled.

“Don’t make it weird.”

“OK.” He answered.

“OK. Now let’s go.”

**********

Y/N’s brain was going a thousand miles a minute since Harry kissed her. It scared her that she had no clue where things would have gone had Sarah not called. He was such an amazing kisser that she would’ve stayed there all night if he wanted. She was completely zoned out with a fry in her hand until she felt a little nudge on her shoulder.

“Hey… you good?” Niall asked making everyone look to her.

“Hmmm?” She asked and he chuckled.

“You’re completely zoned out there, babe.” He smiled.

“Oh, sorry… just thinking.” She said and shook her head before she continued eating. She could’ve sworn she saw Harry’s smug grin through her peripheral vision. As they continued eating and hanging out she was just distracted. She didn’t want to look at him, especially when she felt his eyes on her, begging her to turn to him, but she wasn’t giving in. This was confusing. Why had he kissed her? They were barely civil with each other. Why did she enjoy it so much? Why was she dying to do it again? She was in a trance the rest of the night, barely realizing that they had walked outside and were saying their goodbyes until Mitch was pulling her in for a hug and mumbling a “see you later”.

“Right.” she hummed before moving on to Sarah and then Harry.

“Need a ride?” He asked her, “I know you kind of live the opposite way.” He said to Niall now as he pulled away from Y/N.

“It’s no problem, I can take her.” He said to Harry and then looked to Y/N, “It’s no bother.” He assured her with a smile. Harry was expecting for her to reason with him, after all Niall did live the opposite way as them. And they sort of had unfinished business. They were both looking at her expectantly.

“Are you sure?” She asked Niall and Harry hated the flip his stomach did when she stepped closer to Niall.

“Yeah, of course.” He confirmed and she smiled softly.

“Thank you, Harry, I think I’ll just go with Niall.” She said and he felt his jaw tense but he nodded at her.

“Well good night, see you guys around.” He said and turned around and headed off towards his car without another glance back. Y/N frowned when she realized that he was upset. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go with him… god, she was dying to. But that was exactly why she needed to go with Niall. Things with him had always been tumultuous and just because they kissed it didn’t mean that they were suddenly friends. If anything, it made things a lot more complicated and messy. She loved their little group and she would need to figure this out before making a decision about this.

“Geez… he’s in a mood.” Sarah mumbled as they watched him walk off.

“When is he not?” Mitch chuckled in response, to which they all sort of agreed upon. And soon they were all parting ways. She settled into Niall’s car and they took off towards her home. It was quiet for a bit and then she spoke up.

“Are you maybe up for a drink?” She asked.

“Now?”

“Yeah. I know it’s late but, just kinda in the mood.” She explained, he seemed a little conflicted, “My treat?” She said and he chuckled, “You can say no.” she said and he looked to her briefly.

“I want to, I just have work in the morning.” He explained.

“I live close to the studio, we can just drink at mine and you can sleep over?” She bargained and he nodded.

“Yeah, alright.” He agreed.

“I’ve got some clothes you can borrow too.” She assured and he nodded as they headed towards her place. After the music played between them for a bit he cleared his throat and looked to her for a sec as they stopped at a red light.

“Am I crazy or was Harry upset at you for coming with me?” He said and she just audibly sighed and he chuckled upon the silent confirmation, “And why does this warrant a drink?” He followed up and she just let herself fall back into the seat where she turned her head towards him.

“When we got in the car he…kissed me.” She said quietly and Niall’s eyes went wide, “I know! Like… what the hell?” She exclaimed, they were so wrapped up in the moment that they were startled by the car behind them honking for them to move past the intersection since the light was now green. He hurried forward, looking back to the road.

“Shit…” he mumbled.

“Right. Like… it was good. But I’m not sure how I feel and I think he wanted to kind of… continue where we left off.”

“Understandable to both things…” he said and she giggled, “Hey, it’s valid because you don’t get along but also you’re a good kisser, I would want to continue exploring that.” He chuckled and she did so too. “That’s random… did you like, have a moment or something?”

“No? I don’t think so? I was just looking up the directions you had sent me when he made his move!” She explained.

“And you let him…” Niall said with a grin and she felt her face heat up in embarrassment.

“I guess I did. I mean, can you blame me? All the frustration and irritation we feel towards each other, there’s always so much tension, you have to wonder if it’s just sexual tension, you know?” She covered up her true reason for allowing the kiss expertly, but Niall wasn’t buying it.

“Alright…” he responded incredulously, “What if he likes you?” He asked and Y/N felt her heart flutter at the prospect of that. It made her a little nervous to think that.

“Nah…”

“I mean, who knows…do you…like him?” Niall asked and she immediately shook her head.

“No. I mean, he’s cool when we get along and I can’t say he’s not attractive… but no.” she replied. Maybe she had a crush on him… she liked the idea that he was a bit unavailable to her.

“Well maybe you will at some point.” He reasoned and she chuckled incredulously.

“Doubt it.”

*********

Harry was annoyed. She had chosen to go with Niall instead of him; he just wanted to feel things out. He was seeing parts of her that he really liked and it excited him that she seemed to also like him. Their dynamic had been wonderful over the last couple weeks and he just wanted to see what was up, was that so wrong?

He couldn’t admit to himself that he was into her. It just wasn’t an option because it would mean that the tight feeling in his chest wasn’t just territorial jealousy… it would mean that he felt hurt and betrayed by her choosing someone else over him. And that was a lot to unpack all on its own. He pulled his phone off of the bedside table and opened up his instagram, he saw a recent story on her private friends (that’s usually the only place she posted) and he clicked on it against his better judgement. There he saw her leaned against a man’s bare chest, it was hairy and muscular, no tattoos… it was obviously Niall. He felt his blood boil in anger as he read her little caption “SLEEPOVERS” with a little star eyes emoji. What did that mean if not that they had just fucked and that he left her feeling all dazed and starry eyed. Or at least he had gotten her off or something. He decided to just try sleeping and tried not to guilt himself for even trying to feel anything with her. It was irritating that he still wasn’t sure what he would’ve done had Sarah not called and asked where they were. What had he been thinking, trying to start something with her? Would he have tried to go further had she accepted the ride from him? He just wondered and wondered until he fell asleep.

********

Harry was mad at her again. He was back to his old self making all these unnecessary and rude remarks and not really caring who witnessed his bad attitude towards her over the last two weeks. It even lead Niall to tell her that he probably saw her instagram story and got jealous. It had to be that… what else could it be? She hadn’t done anything to him or said anything to him. She just didn’t like how things were going, so after work she decided to drop by Roxy’s and see if he was willing to talk things out. It was near closing time and she wandered in, she didn’t hear a greeting or anything, he was probably in the back. So she wandered around, sifting through things, new releases and the donations section to see if any rare gems had been dropped off.

“Welcome in, sorry I was in-” Harry paused when he saw her turn around, his smile dropping from his face, “Y/N, what’re you doing here?” He asked and she sighed.

“I came to talk to you.” She explained and sighed.

“About?” He asked.

“About why we’re back to our old shit. I thought he had agreed to be OK.” She said coming closer and he sighed. She was right, he shouldn’t have reacted like a petulant child.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” He said lowly and she bit her lip as she came closer.

“It’s alright… and I have an inkling of suspicion that me leaving with Niall last week kind of catalyzed this shift…” she started carefully.

“We really don’t need to talk about that. Let’s just forget anything happened.” He said firmly and headed back to the register counter. She bit her lip and followed him behind the counter and sat at the stool he had back there as he started organizing to close out for the night. She didn’t want to forget what happened, it had been good, really good. Definitely worth remembering.

“Harry.” she said quietly.

“Yeah?” He asked as he typed away on the check out tablet.

“I don’t want to forget about what happened.” She let out and she saw his movements freeze as he let out a long exhale, “Can you look at me for a minute?” She asked and he turned, still leaning on the counter directly across from her, “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings when I left with Niall-”

“For the record, you didn’t hurt-”

“OK, whatever that was then.” She said and he continued looking at her with a straight face, “I was nervous to leave with you because I just didn’t know where we would end up. And we’re just… getting to a good place you know? I didn’t want to risk us biting off far more of each other than we can chew and let things get all tense and messy again.”

“So you hook up with someone else to process through that instead of just talking to me about it?” He asked, a tone of irritation laced into his words.

“I didn’t do anything with Niall.” She clarified, “We literally watched a movie and cuddled, OK? I was going to talk to you about it and then you started acting like a-”

“An arrogant son of a bitch?” He cut in and she sputtered on a laugh.

“I was gonna say “jerk”, you goof.” She said swinging her foot out and lightly knocking his shin with the tip of her shoe, making him grin at the floor. He was embarrassed.

“I’m…sorry.” He apologized, finally looking at her again and she smiled.

“That’s hard for you to say, isn’t it?”

“Don’t mock.” He warned and she shook her head.

“M’not. It’s hard for me too. I think we’re a lot more alike than we care to admit.” She confessed, “Look, just don’t get all upset like that next time. It kind of… does things to me.”

“I wasn’t upset.” He said again but then spoke again, “Like what kind of things?” He asked and she sighed.

“Like makes me feel guilty…like I made you feel bad… and as much as this animosity between us is fun,” she explained, “I get that it’s mostly just banter, you know? Thinking that I had actually done something to make you upset was not nice for me.” She confessed and he nodded in understanding, “Well, I guess I was feeling bad for nothing since you weren’t upset, though.” She finished and he looked into her eyes with a grin.

“Right. I wasn’t upset.” He confirmed and she giggled and looked down at her lap, feet swinging lightly against the stool, “But… I was…jealous.” He mumbled quietly and her eyes met his again. He expected some satisfied little grin or a teasing remark but he was met with nothing of the sort. Instead, her eyes were filled with a little surprise that she was masking rather well, he must credit her.

“Well, you’ve nothing to be jealous about, baby.” She said cooly and certainly and he just let his lips turn un in a little smile and felt his cheeks heating with a blush, “Well, now that we’re cool again…” she said as she slid off the stool, “I should be going.” She finished as she straightened out her skirt.

“Right, do you need a ride?” He asked and she shook her head.

“Kinda feel like a walk.” She said and he nodded.

“OK, well please let me know when you get home, yeah?” He said as she headed around the counter.

“Yeah, I will.” She assured as she dug around for her headphones.

��And if you change your mind about walking at any moment or just get tired of walking you just need to call m-”

“Yes, I’ll call Niall…” she joked and he shook his head with a chuckle.

“You’re being mean.”

“It was a joke. I will call you.” She said and stuck out her pinky to him, “I pinky promise.” He smiled and let his finger wrap around hers for a moment before they were slipping apart and he watched her walk out of the shop. God, he was so into her.

********

It had been a few weeks since their talk at Roxy’s and Harry and Y/N were getting along just fine. Did they still get annoyed with each other, of course, but they no longer resorted to any petty digs or rude comebacks. Everyone noticed and they loved the new vibe in the group. Even Harry and Y/N felt better as individuals, she had never realized how exhausting it was to always be fighting or upset at someone until she wasn’t. That’s why even when she saw her ex at this party she didn’t really feel anything bad, she just moved on with her life for the evening, talking with other people and ignoring his existence. That was until he decided that he didn’t like that.

“Y/N.” She heard and turned to the side, smiling as the alcohol in her system provided her with a good buzz.

“Hi David.” She responded and he smiled, expecting a not so friendly greeting from her, but she was on a good one.

“You look like a million bucks.” He said eyeing her up and down and she smiled.

“Umm, thank you.” She accepted the compliment, “You’re looking good too.” She reciprocated. He looked a lot more buff and his shorter hair really suited him. See, Y/N was being friendly and it seemed that he was too. Sure, their relationship had ended pretty badly, but when he apologized to her for how things had ended she felt more at ease to continue entertaining him. They were catching up and talking about how things were going for each other. She had a bit more to drink and soon enough was getting tired, it was time to go home.

“Well David, I am shocked to say this, but I’m glad I ran into you.”

“Oh, are you heading out?”

“Yeah.” She confirmed.

“In this state?” He frowned.

“Oh no, I took an uber. I planned on drinking a bit so I didn’t want to risk it, you know?”

“Right. Well, I’ve only had 3 beers, I could drop you off if you want?” He said and she bit her lip. She would feel safer with someone she knew so she agreed and soon they were walking out and as soon as the cool night air hit her face she understood just how much she had actually drank. Despite that, they were settling into his car, he started it, and after a few moments they were taking off. “You still live in the same place?” He asked and she nodded.

“Yeah.” She verbalized, “Fuck, I didn’t think I had drank this much.” She confessed and he chuckled.

“Did you want me to open the window?”

“Please.” She said and he did so, letting some fresh air in so she felt less stuffy.

“So… are you seeing anyone?” He asked and she glanced at him with tired eyes.

“No. I mean, I haven’t properly dated anyone since you.” She explained, obviously oversharing in her drunkenness. However, David took this information as an “I miss you” and so when he stopped at the red light he just leaned over and kissed her hungrily. She was taken back and pushed him away, “David.” She panted at the advance.

“Sorry, you just make me crazy.” He confessed before he took off. She noticed that he turned down another main street.

“My house is the other way.”

“I know, babe. We can just go to mine, s’closer.”

“Wait.”

“What?” He asked.

“I’m not… like. I don’t want to hook up with you.” She clarified through a giggle.

“You said you haven’t seen anyone since me.”

“Yeah, I haven’t. I’m still working through shit from us, it’s not because I’m not over you.” She giggled in her drunkenness. All ability to be tactful was gone. He glanced at her angrily and she suddenly felt nervous, “I’m sorry.” She said softly and he groaned.

“You always do this. You always back out of things.” He said as he drove further, “You leave people hanging once you’ve unloaded all your shit on them.” He seethed and she was growing angry.

“You think we ended because I have no follow through? That’s rich! Listen to the way you’re speaking to me and tell me who in their right mind would stay with you, David!” She countered and suddenly he was pulling towards the curb and slammed on the breaks making her jolt forward, groaning as the seatbelt tightened up at the movement and the material dug harshly into her chest and lower stomach, she felt the material pinching at her skin when she tried to move, “What the hell, David?” She groaned, she went to unbuckle herself to get comfortable again and he covered the clasp.

“You think I need you?” He asked angrily, “Such an arrogant and stuck up bitch, like you? Sweetheart, I have been better than ever without you around.” He muttered.

“That’s why you were trying to take me to your place and fuck me, huh? Because you don’t need someone like me?” She challenged.

“You think you’re special because you’ve done one good thing in your stupid, little life?” She felt her eyes starting to glaze over, “I never gave a fuck about you. I let you stick around because you give good head and aren’t a bad fuck, but you’re nothing special, Y/N.” He seethed.

“Let me out.” Her voice quivered.

“Gladly.” He responded curtly and unbuckled her before unlocking the car and she hurried out, “Fuck you!” He shouted as she slammed the door and she just started rushing down the sidewalk. This was not an ideal place to be stranded, her vision was blurry from her tears, she was crying so hard that her contacts had even slipped out of her eyes and as she tripped on an uneven piece of sidewalk she felt hard onto her knees, wincing at the pain of the new scrapes. She whimpered for a moment and got herself up and leaned against the nearest building, feeling more sober than before. She grabbed her phone from her bag and saw it was nearly 2am, but despite that she didn’t even hesitate when she searched up Harry’s name and called him. It only rung a few times before he picked up.

“Hello?” He sounded hoarse and sleepy.

“H-harry, s’me ummm-”

“Are you alright?” He asked, a lot more awake when he heard the crack in her voice, she was crying.

“I'm a little drunk, but I’m fine. But ummm-” she sniffled, “I’m kind of tired of walking.” She said softly and he smiled, he remembered their pinky promise from a few weeks back.

“Send me your location. I’ll be there in a few.” He said softly.

“OK.” She whispered, he could hear her fumbling a bit, “There.” She said into the speaker. He looked at it and was relieved that it was only 15 minutes away.

“It’s only 15 minutes away, I’m leaving now. Are you somewhere well lit?”

“There’s a shell gas station at the end of the block, I’ll see you there?”

“Yeah.”

“And Harry?”

“Yes?”

“Thank you.” She whispered.

“It’s not a problem, I’ll see you soon.” He said quietly, before hanging up.

Y/N waited for a bit before she saw his car pulling into the station. She made her way over to it and slipped inside quietly.

“Are you alright?” He asked right away and she nodded, he looked her over, “Your knees.”

“I fell.” She explained.

“Did you want me to take you to yours or back to mine?”

“Mine if it’s not too much trouble. Really want a shower.” She explained and he nodded and took off, deciding not to say anything about her smudged makeup. They were quiet for a little bit and then she spoke up, “I ran into my ex at the party tonight.” She explained, “I thought he was just being nice… he had been all night. He was just trying to fuck. I obviously told him that I was over him and didn’t want that… but he can be so mean sometimes when he talks to me.”

“I’m sorry.” He said softly and she sighed.

“He said that he never cared about me… he was just using me.”

“Well he’s a fucking prick, I hope you know that.” He said and she nodded.

“Yeah, I do. S’why I dumped his ass.” She said and he smiled. Soon, they were pulling up to her townhome and she sighed, “Thank you, Harry. For everything.” She said quietly and he smiled.

“S’no problem, I couldn’t break our pinky swear.” He reminded and she smiled.

“I know it’s late, do you want to stay?”

“Don’t want to be alone?” He asked and she smiled sadly.

“Yeah, something like that.” She admitted.

“C’mon then.” He said and they got out of the car and she let them into her townhome. Harry was already in his sleeping clothes so Y/N told him to feel free to just get into bed, which he did while she showered and put on Pinky and the Brain. She felt bruises forming imprints of the seatbelt onto her right shoulder and her lower stomach, she cleaned her knees gently and then was drying off. She huffed when she realized that she didn’t have clothes.

“Shit…” she huffed, shivering a bit at the cold taking over. She opened the door quietly, “Umm, Harry?” She called out.

“Hmmm?” She heard faintly.

“I forgot to grab clothes, I’m coming out in a towel, OK?”

“Do you want me to close my eyes?” He asked and she peaked her head out and just smiled.

“You don’t have to, I was just giving you a warning before you thought I was trying to take advantage or seduce you or something.” She said as she walked out, clinging tightly to the towel. She headed to her dresser and pulled out a giant t-shirt and some shorts. When she turned back to go to the bathroom she took in Harry laying on her bed (not on her side, surprisingly) one of his hands was behind his head, propping him up to watch the TV, the other was laying on his stomach and his legs were extended out, ankles crossed over each other. He looked completely comfortable, like he’d been in this position hundreds of times before.

“Hey, wait.” He shot up from his position.

“What?” She asked, stopping before heading back into the ensuite bathroom. He came up to her and frowned at the mark on her shoulder. It was going down to the top of her breast.

“That bruise.” He frowned, his eyebrows furrowed.

“David-” she mumbled and Harry breathed in sharply, “He slammed on the breaks and it triggered the lock on the seatbelt.” She explained and he nodded.

“Does it hurt?”

“Just a little.” She responded softly. “I’m pretty sure there’s gonna be one on my lower stomach from the bottom of the belt.” She sighed and he shook his head. He felt upset at this; he knew she could be a tough pill to swallow, but she was so good underneath it all. She was misunderstood and he saw that now. “Alright, let me get changed.” She said and he allowed her to head back in, after a few minutes she was out and asking if he wanted water or something, to which he agreed and soon enough she was coming back and climbing into her bed. Her air freshener and the TV screen provided a light glow to the bed room as they got comfortable.

“I’m sorry this happened to you.” He said quietly and she sighed.

“I can be a bit mouthy sometimes…” she sighed and he turned to her, face set in a frown.

“No one should treat you like that or do something to deliberately hurt you just because you got “mouthy”, that’s not OK.” He said seriously but quietly, “You understand that, right?”

“Yeah… I think that’s why ummm… that’s why I can be a little snappy or defensive when we argue sometimes, force of habit. Have to pretend it doesn’t get under my skin, you know?” She said softly and he just took her in, the sadness in her eyes, he understood her a lot better now. She sighed, “I’m sorry if I ever took it too far or if I ever-” she fell silent as his hand came up and combed her hair back.

“I’m sorry too for pushing your buttons. I know I can be…an asshole sometimes…” he trailed off and she smiled softly, “What?”

“You’re not an asshole, Harry. You’re… maybe one of the best people I’ve ever met.” She whispered and he smiled back at her. He wanted to kiss her right now, but after the night she’d had, the last thing he wanted to do was put another unforeseen circumstance on her plate.

“Can I ask you a serious question?”

“Yeah.” She responded, not breaking eye contact with him.

“Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?” He asked and she giggled.

“I can do either one.” She responded and he smiled.

“Me too, m’a cuddler, so if you want a cuddle just scoot on in, I won’t mind.” He said and she just shifted over, laying her head on his chest as his arm held her back. “They’re Pinky and the Brain. Yes, Pinky and the Brain. One is a genius the other’s insane. They’re laboratory mice, their genes have been spliced. They’re Pinky and the Brain, brain, brain, brain. Brain, brain, brain, brain. Brain!” Harry sang quietly and she smiled, letting him continue, “Before each night is done their plan will be unfurled by the dawning of the sun. They’ll take over the world! They’re Pinky and the Brain. Yes, Pinky and the Brain. Their twilight campaign is easy to explain. To prove their mousy worth they’ll overthrow the earth. They’re Pinky. They’re Pinky and the Brain, brain, brain, brain. Brain, brain, brain, brain-”

“Narf!” Y/N honked in a Pinky-esque voice and Harry just burst into laughter as did she. They laughed for a little before settling down.

“That was cute.” He hummed softly and she smiled as she nuzzled closer against him and he hugged around her waist a little tighter, his thumb grazed against her soothingly. She felt completely comfortable with him right now. Could this have always been their dynamic had they just tried to be nicer from the start? She loved this… everything about how he had really come through for her and those were the thoughts that helped lull her to sleep right within his hold.

Y/N woke up before Harry and it was interesting to her how she was now the one hugging around him, he was cuddled up closer into her embrace, legs tangled together. He smelled like himself and a little cologne and it was so lovely. And he was warm, so warm. She wanted to make him something nice for having left the comfort of his own home to answer her drunk call to come get her when she was in a tight spot. She slipped out, ensuring he was still covered up and she went and made him some eggs Benedict, vegetarian because she knew he preferred that, adding in avocado instead of the meat. She ground up coffee beans and made him a fresh brew and soon enough she was heading back to her bedroom, seeing that he had rolled over to the center of the bed. She sat beside him and took him in for a moment, she wasn’t sure where she should touch him to wake him, she didn’t want to startle him.

“Stop staring, creep.” he rasped out and she smiled but flicked his arm.

“I just didn’t want to startle you. I made breakfast.”

“I know… smells amazing.” He said turning over and opening his eyes. How he wanted to reach over and pull her down to cuddle him again. He looked so cozy and relaxed, she wanted to be back in the bed with him. And when he made no move to get up she smiled.

“What if I bring the food up here and we just-”

“Be lazy?” He asked and she nodded.

“Are you playing hooky?” She asked.

“Nah, I was gonna take today off actually.” He explained.

“For?” She inquired and he looked to her nervously before speaking.

“I’m working on an EP. I need to kind of show some songs to my producers next week and I haven’t been putting in enough time, so today was gonna be for that.”

“Well… feel free to do that here. Or if you want to head out after you eat.” She offered and he smiled, “Let me go grab the food.” She said before hurrying out of the room. He did hang out for a few hours after they ate and once he had secured some studio time in the evening with Mitch he headed out.

*******

“Hey man, where’ve you been all day?” Mitch asked as he walked into the studio.

“Hey. Umm, I was actually with Y/N.” He said and Mitch froze.

“All night and all day?” He asked again and Harry nodded with a soft smile.

“She’s not so bad.” He said nonchalantly.

“Are you saying that because you slept with her?” He asked in concern and Harry looked at him harshly.

“No. I didn’t sleep with her. She just had a rough night, OK?”

“And she called you? Was Niall not available?” He joked as he unpacked his guitar.

“You’re such a dick…” Harry huffed through a laugh, “A few weeks back when she came over to talk and fix things she walked home and I made her promise to let me know when she just wasn’t up for walking or if she ever got tired on her way home. So she was a little drunk and took me up on that offer and I gave her a lift and we just hung out during the day.” He explained, skipping over the details.

“Well I’m glad you’re getting along. I told you she was cool.”

“Yeah, she is.” He said as he tuned his own guitar.

“Did you finish THE SONG?” Mitch asked.

“Yeah and I gave it a name too! I called it Meet Me in the Hallway.” He elaborated as he strummed out a chord, checking his tuning job.

“Nice. Well, I’m sure we’ll get that demo done today but you need a few more songs.”

“I’ve got one I did a while back, I think we can make it into something cool. And well, the others, I don’t know.”

“Time to get writing!” Mitch said as he plugged in his guitar.

“Yeah…” Harry huffed tiredly.

*******

“Fuck…” Harry huffed as he crumbled up yet another sheet of paper.

Writing under pressure was hard enough, let alone writing something good under pressure. Especially when the only thing swimming in his brain was Y/N’s drunk call to come help her… he was glad she had called. Dare he say, he missed her. He wished he had kissed her before he left today, her lips were totally meant to move with his, but then there was this fear underlying his feelings. They were just barely trying to be friends… how ridiculous was he for already starting to like her? He swears he’s so naive to romance sometimes… like an eager little boy. It was pathetic, he didn’t want to leave her house today because the feeling of loneliness he felt when he wasn’t around her was enormous. He grabbed his pen again and started scribbling down some phrases that came to mind and he bit his lip.

“I’m gonna write a song about you, aren’t I?” He whispered to himself. “No, you’re not.” He whispered stubbornly to himself, “I can’t. I mean… after everything she’s put me through…I have more dignity and pride than that.” He muttered tiredly before sighing as he thought back to their conversation a few weeks back when he called himself an arrogant son of a bitch. Maybe he could use that...

“I guess I’m doing this.” He sighed.

[riseofthecommonwoodpile]

what's the best place to start with dean blunt and / or inga copland - you reviewed a lot of their albums and I remember them being super praised in like tmt a decade ago - is it the one with the praying hands?

sometimes i get anons that feel like a kind zookeeper has found the ultimate enrichment object for my particular species of insane person

but yes i L O V E dean and inga, but their discography is uh. a bit intimidating lmao (as of right now i have 42 releases by them in my iTunes). at one point, i made an hour long playlist for people looking to get into them, which i cannot seem to find, but if anyone wants it send me an ask or a message and i'll re-create it and upload on my google drive or something. my own personal top 10 looks like this:

Lolina- Lolita EP

Dean Blunt- Jill Scott Herring OST

Dean Blunt & Inga Copeland- Black is Beautiful

Lolina- The Smoke

Dean Blunt- Stone Island

Babyfather- 419

Dean Blunt- The Redeemer

Babyfather- "BBF" Hosted By DJ Escrow

Lolina- RELAXIN' With Lolina

Hype Williams- One Nation

But I think some of these (especially the top 2) really, *really* benefit from a broad knowledge of their work as a whole, and are not really the kind of place to get started with them. this is true of their discography far more than most artists. their work is best experienced cumulatively, and is very purposefully fragmentary; charitably intertextual and abstract, uncharitably half-finished and tossed off. so i'm kinda worried that no album i give you will be like, "the one".

BUT REGARDLESS, let's do it anyways, though i am going to be insufferable and give you three suggestions as different possible places to start, but all total it's under an hour of music, so i don't think i'm being unreasonable:

Copeland's RELAXIN' With Lolina (under her Lolina project) is a three song EP of. uh. pop music? i guess? the stuff she's done under the Lolina name is (mostly) structured something like dance pop, but with the parts replaced ship of Theseus style until it becomes unsettling and weird, intimidating, threatening. her melodies are *wildly* memorable, but the spaces they're put in are so sparse and the words so cryptically evocative that she feels at the center like both victim and aggressor. wildly out of tune pianos, heavily slapback delayed drums, shitty synth wind instrument patches, it's all so off-putting and so satisfyingly good (and it'll become less off-putting the more you hear).

Dean Blunt's Stone Island is my favorite example of Blunt's R&B / indie pop / singer-sampler...thing he does (see also Black Metal, The Redeemer, SOUL ON FIRE, etc.), hypnagogic loops of light guitar, some washed out synths, string samples, unhurried drum loops, etc. backing his uniquely normal voice. he's not a "good" singer by any means, almost always pitchy, kinda unsure, but his voice *is* uniquely evocative in how it so often sounds like someone singing to themselves rather than singing to an audience, creating this subjective space, a space of interiority that Blunt uses to create his own kind of subtler unsettling darkness. The loops on "Three" imply a triumphant kind of melancholy, ask for empathy, and then Blunt sings about how "nobody's gonna catch you when you falling down, and nobody's gonna want you when I run you out of town." it's brilliant.

And then Cypher, from Blunt's Babyfather project (his most explicitly hip-hop oriented) takes up both a very different side of him as well as calling back to the hallucinatory sampledelia of Hype Williams. the way it moves between ideas is genuinely dreamlike, a sort of free association that makes sense intuitively but rarely logically, sounds played backward and forward, stretched, degraded, layered, spliced, ruined. I will admit that the first time i heard it it got on my fucking nerves (the amount of reversed vocals and rhythm tracks is grating if you aren't sure where it's going), but I think being kinda frustrated and annoyed is also part of the Hype Williams Extended Universe Experience, so hey! it also is the one here with the easiest to divine political content, which is usually present in their work (if rarely explicit).

If you like RELAXIN', check out Lolina's The Smoke next. If you like Stone Island, then do The Redeemer. And if Cypher works for you, go to "BBF" Hosted By DJ Escrow to focus on the hip-hop influences, and One Nation for the hallucinatory, sample-focused trip.

I hope that helps!!

[vaultureculture]

So, A New Era episode 7...

I must admit, I had fun. The dialogues felt somewhat unnecessary at times, but not to the extent of the previous chapters. 

That said, the pricing has been, once again, insane. I had around 9200 maana when I started it, and now, I’m left with 5728. What a SCAM. The outfit was overpriced, as usual. I don't like how the dress looks, nor the color palette chosen for it. When I saw the life being sucked out of my maana count in paying for something destined to collect dust in my Guardian’s wardrobe, I swear I heard the crack of my heart splitting in two. 

Now, let’s talk a bit about Koori, shall we?

Some people in the fandom are mad pissed. Folks want Koori's head on a silver platter because throwing a party at the onset of another apocalypse is, well, foolish. And I, sometimes, I feel like I'm the only one who doesn't dislike Koori. Quite the opposite. 

She is childish, obnoxious, and nonsensical at times, but she is meant to come across that way. Perhaps I have missed it, but not once have I seen a character praise her because of such flaws. In fact, they all acknowledge these characteristics as part of her nature, but prefer focusing on the positives if she happens to be their friend.

She is canonically insufferable and we know that. Mathieu likes it, because he enjoys the constant banter and playful back and forth they have. Many others are annoyed as fuck by it, like Nevra or Lance. You can choose to call her out, not to get along with her. Erika can be and sometimes is uncomfortable with her flirting and mixed signals. Her presence may be forced sometimes, but what is not required is to get along with her. Unlike with Rosalya in MCL, Koori is not your best friend by default. She is just a colleague. 

Again: Is Koori forced into scenarios many times? Yeah. Is she an annoying Mary Sue, as many people claim? I have to disagree. 

She has many flaws that are treated as such. The incident in episode 6 with her protective stones is a prime example of it. Koori is terrified. She has been traumatized by a violent ex-husband, who completely robbed her of her agency. She's also incredibly stubborn, a woman that has taken her fate into her own hands time and time again. She wanted to protect herself, but her agitated state of mind caused it to backfire. 

The “all men are bad” thing? I can only say that, yes, it is a terrible way of thinking, but as a survivor of abuse within a couple myself, you do start to think that way if trauma is never healed. One can reason when they're calm. The second your trauma gets triggered, the “you’re all going to hurt me, you’re all the same, stop lying to me” mentality comes back and strong. It is a natural response to protect yourself from further harm, and it makes you say things you wouldn’t say under normal circumstances. 

Then we come to this episode, episode 7. Koori is very likely as mentally exhausted as the rest of the expedition, if not more. Despite it all, her reaction is to throw a party to cheer everyone up, including herself. It's childish, immature, vain, even, but it is also somewhat brave. To ignore your pain enough to do something like that takes a lot of strength. Her initiative came from a good place, even if it was not the most mature or professional way to react.  

I personally believe that she's right in saying things are in the hands of the higher-ups right now. To lament and mope around wouldn't solve shit. So she preferred using her time to help the entire guard relax before days of anguish and neverending work came.

I enjoy her devil-may-care attitude. It's refreshing when you're surrounded by the self-important pricks that the chiefs of Eel have become. I don't wanna say Nevra and Huang Hua, but, Nevra and Huang Hua. Me, I’m tired of those. 

Talking about Nevra and Huang Hua, who the hell put them in charge? 

Huang Hua's lack of transparency is starting to smell really bad. She does not allow her peers to question her decisions, and if she does, it is because she knows her word will be followed regardless. I understand that some information must remain confidential, but to hide things even from ERIKA, the one who saved her ass? sussy baka 😫  

I don't know if the idea of opening more portals is genius or the stupidest shit I've ever seen. It's bound to be interesting, that's for sure. 

When the ball started, though, I was under the impression that the Huang Hua we used to know had returned.  Her overjoyed screeching very much reminded me of how she used to be. Same with the ABSOLUTELY CURSED WHY DID ERIKA STARE LIKE THAT, GIVE THEM PRIVACY scene where she kisses Ewelein in the hallway. I thoroughly enjoyed those moments, where we got to see her relax and love like any other member of the Guard.

As for Nevra, congratulations, you made someone who was previously in Nevra's route fall apart with him. 

My distaste towards him is peculiar, though. I do not dislike the guy at all, and his arrogance does not take me by surprise. Already in The Origins, he had a mean temper, was overly ambitious, and let fleeting glories get to his head.

What baffles me is how cold he is towards everyone. He seems to be genuinely unable to feel attached to others. He's taken many decisions that are questionable at best and downright cruel at worst.  

His whole ridiculous tirade about how all humans are terrible makes no sense to me, considering Eel is just as brutal as the Earth. We have witnessed children being murdered, prejudice against other faery races, against humans, treason...the entire world of Eldarya was created through a sacrifice, and those who did not agree to it were LITERALLY GENOCIDED. Both the humans and faery are the same. Where does this weird sense of superiority come from? Why would Nevra say something like that, knowing Mat, AND POSSIBLY HIS FORMER LOVER  WHOM HE SWORE ETERNAL LOVE TO, are in the room? 

This boy needs some help lmao. 

Other observations

Erika's comment about jealousy when she's having lunch with Karenn and Chrome. "She wanted to be happy for them, but she couldn't". I think jealousy is not as simple. You absolutely can be jealous and cheering for someone at the same time. You're not angry because they're in a couple. You're just sad for yourself because you haven't found somebody. That is a human feeling, and it should not be vilified. Jealousy does not consist in wishing pain upon others but rather in longing to change yourself.

I was surprised by Leiftan confessing that he had lost his powers. I genuinely believed he simply did not want to fight out of regret.  That adds another layer to all his choices in the past episodes. I wonder how helpless and frustrated he must have felt seeing his comrades in danger while he stood there, hands tied. Nevra’s going to have a lot of apologizing to do when he’s told this information lmfao. 

Mandatory naked Lance mention. An annoying moment for those who are not his route, but me, I laughed hard. Even imagining Guardians who hate him come across that...and just...the staring option...how delightfully awkward. I do believe he may resemble Valkyon in that regard, though. He probably doesn't see bodies as something worth censoring, they're natural, just a body. It was pure chaos and I welcome it. 

The missions with our Guard were super fun. Playing good cop bad cop with Chrome was hilarious lmao. I’ve heard they’re all different, depending on your guard. In this playthrough, I am in the Shadow Guard. 

People will probably burn me at the stake for this one, but I really like Mathieu. His himbo energy is pleasant to me. I find how much he cares about those close to him very sweet. I loved him standing up for humanity, despite being this immature fantastical young adult with his head up in the clouds. His temporary cockiness is laughable in the best way. I can't wait for him to go apeshit though, because something about him is still shady. Beemov, don't disappoint.

Give me more Adalric and I’ll give you money. Love the guy. Same with Jamon and Karuto, I am getting very attached to them. 

The dance scene was very short, but I am somehow not bothered by this. I like it like that. Short but sweet, good ending point for the next episode to begin imo.