#on the 24th i pack half my apartment up to move and learn that my cars officially totaled

[flufflecat]

it has been a long week here comes a tag rant

[sol-futura-est]

Sol was always smug when he talked, but when you found him, he was looking off into the distance wild eyed. As if you were right next to a tiger still in the grass looking down on prey mere yards away. As if he was seeing things he couldn’t move out of his visage.

    “What happens next? After I’m in Suceava.”

    “Not for me to say. More than you at play, my friend. More situations than you will know. Just be well behaved, and do what you think is right, just as you’ve done.”

    This man, this being, was rigid. Rules were rules, and they did not bend for him or I. At least now, there didn’t seem to be much to say, but he sat smiling, as if seeing me was a delight, a reality he was happy in.

    “There’s not much to tell me then, now that the ball’s rolling.”

    “Not much, no. Besides reminding you that you’re not just an anomaly. People don’t remain mystical for long. Before man found the narwhal, the unicorn was an anomaly. Albeit one that didn’t exist.”

    Sol always made good points, but there was no sense in talking. I simply nodded, before walking away. Laughter rang out as I passed, and when I turned, his glinting, shining eyes stared me down.

    “This won’t be our last meeting, Octa. Trust me.”

    Feet didn’t stop for him. Nor for his amusement. As soon as I lent my hand on the door, it ceased, and the guards greeted me all the same. Each stretch of hallway was as pristine as it was the first time I came in. As I entered the apartment, Mortimer was still there, sat on a stool where he was standing just a few hours ago, thinking. 

    “So what happened?”

    “Send a letter to Pescariu. I’ll be there for the winter.”

    “Just like that?”

    “I don’t think there’s a single choice here that will lead to anything bigger than any other. At least here, I’ll end up learning to ride a horse, and I can spend some time in a new place, learning something valuable.”

    “It’s not a bad idea, kid, but I’ll talk to him about it first thing tomorrow. Are you gonna head off to bed?”

    “Not for a few more hours.”

    “Marcus told me to give this to you.”

    When Mortimer reached across the kitchen island, he gripped an old notebook, a date written on the front in old marker, laminated over by hand with clear packing tape.

    September 2199 to January 2204

    “Is this Marcus’ Journal?”

    “He said it was from his time in Damascus as a military attache to local militia, he actually was with Julian when this happened. The consul.”

    “He mentioned some earlier.”

    Morty winced, clear with disgust.

    “He doesn’t skimp on details when you ask him in person, but he doesn’t in there either.”

    Nodding softly, I turned to Mortimer, smiling, patting his shoulder before going off to my room. At first I set it on my desk, and didn’t read it. Part of me was scared to read an account of the great peace, only to see it be painted in a brutal light. Part of me knew, at least when I read a history book, that there were details missing. This was much different; this was Marcus’ life.

   

   

"March 9th, 2202

    I have no words beyond rigid facts. Neither does Julian, who even for a skilled member of the espionage corps. I never figured the world would wind up this backward, this amoral, again. I thought we left this behind. I thought it wasn’t possible with our republic holding the reigns of hegemon.

    This warlord, who my interpreter will not utter the Arabic name for, calls himself the Sandstone Demon. Harun will not elaborate much, but the context of the word demon here isn’t exactly a djinn, but something different. Phonetics aside, we call him the Nomad. Not a bedouin, or a pilgrim, or even a caravaner, but a nomad. Without context, simply a wanderer. He bore us gifts of gold inlaid human skulls, that we identified were like Ethiopian, from some thirty or forty years off. Our scouts previously reported every major town in Ethiopia and Somalia to be deserted, desecrated by corpses. Much like the rest of Africa, those who lived after the civil wars retreated to the jungles or the oases. 

    He brought us slaves. Amputees who were supposedly ritually chopped up, and consumed. Those who were quadruple amputees were strapped onto the sides of camels like trophies, some were apparently great warriors who the Nomad defeated or defiled. 

    Our sentries at first repelled skirmishers, but later were offered slaves.

    Whatever is to the south, if anything, has to contend with this man who has made a cult of himself, no doubt from the cesspit of morality that the past was. Formless people striving only toward what is stable, even if barbaric. Malaise was what one of my team leaders said was his first feeling. 

    When I told Julian we can’t risk contact, and that we should shoot on sight any who come within five hundred yards, he shook his head, saying that the senate won’t report this. They’ll just declare the zone uncontested sand, worthless. Our outposts will always remain, but there would be no way the new guys would try to let the image be squandered.

    It came down to optics? What if there’s a would be explorer wanting to see the sand buried city of Mecca, and is instead eaten alive? What then? This is the fact of point, that these creatures lie to the south and they are to be blacklisted? 

    I even saw the Nomad face to face. He was deformed by something, as if his eyelids were melted into some kind of artistic menagerie of lines and swirls. At first he simply sat on his camel, under mounds of white cloth, accented in gold and turquoise, but he told me about how in the deserts both here and in the Horn, the ruins sometimes are filled with places rotten to all life.    

    Could be chemical weapons that went sour, probably not nuclear. Or maybe he simply tried using mustard gas on some unsuspecting village people and was on the other side of the breeze. If it was my discretion, I would’ve killed him, but it’s not under my jurisdiction to do that. Even if I can’t get that girl out of my head, the one who cradled herself on the side of a camel, carved from hip down.

    Each eye was pallid, sunken behind the ridges of the bone. More than mere starvation, it was like her body was decaying whilst alive. As if her soul was bleeding, and each drop of life came down into the veins and sundered everything her creator had deigned hers.

    If I find an excuse, I’m taking it. What good is this senate if justice is unanswered? Perhaps it’s my own discretion that must be requited tenfold. Maybe good men must break the rules."

   

    Rarely did I let myself be unnerved, disgusted, like I did imagining Marcus in this situation. Marcus had been in his forties here, but before the special treatments that I’m told made him so fierce, full of zeal and eager to see enemies. Was it the treatments? How would enhanced adrenaline, lengthened bones, hyperstrength, and extreme intelligence and reactivity do that? If anything, they would make you arrogant, feeling like a superhuman. What if this was why? Seeing the aftermath of things that were once human, scarred from things normalcy would never allow. Almost viscerally I can see the Nomad in front of my face, the reek of sweat and blood mixed into the sight of a clay figurine disfigured, laid out into the sun where the cracks could fill with grime. Draped in rippling linen, like a bust covered for fear of retribution in the disgust, the shock, of seeing it. Brown eyes eternally made rouge, a single struck hawk perched against the cliff, blush and blank stone marbling behind him. Each breath from under the veil filling you with flustered disgust, knowing behind it was once the same life within you. That your blood could be an object of greed to him. That he would reduce you down to that, despite looking in the mirror and seeing himself. Does he look at himself, imaging his own sweetness, or does he realize, for a moment, that he desecrates one of nature’s greatest works, perhaps for some her magnum opus? That, if we believe there to be a soul within one’s chest, that by defiling their body, he defiles his own soul?

    Shaking my head with vigor, I sat still for a moment, realizing the same shock came over me that Marcus may have been under for weeks, months. What did it all mean to him?

    As I held the journal between my fingers, I looked at my right hand. One of the pages was singled out, like someone had turned to it over and over. I turned to it slowly, flattening out the page and breathing slowly.

   

    "November 24th, 2203. 

    Julian hasn’t been able to talk to me for hours. I don’t care. No reason to now. I asked nine men from my personal section to join me, the ones I already knew had proven their loyalty to me in combat. Career men who had quashed bigger bugs for less.

    We tracked across the desert through the long night until we found his camp. As grand as the display was, it wasn’t defensible. Not for camel riders who, frankly, couldn’t see in the dark. Even if they could see us, it was fighting a bear with fists. Our plasma against their rifles older than any ruin you could find. Decorated pieces of fashion more than weapons. 

    As we parsed through the wreckage, the fires were a welcome break from the frigid, flowing sand. When we found him, naked, covered in boils scarred over, his face spouting blood from the burning hole in his stomach, he just looked at me. When you take him off the horse, he doesn’t stand half as tall. A glorified cripple who would’ve died to another tribe in ten years time. 

    But seeing his lifeless corpse after I stood on his neck, it was worth it. The only question was the amputees. After we piled the bodies up, some asked for us to take them back with us. The question was where. So of course, we promised we would return, with trucks, and bring them back. 

    Julian stonewalled the order for my drivers, and drug me into a room once I got back. We hadn’t spoken once, but he arrived just in time to belay the order. When I told him to not speak over a tribune of the republic, he told me to hush, that he could have me subject to a war council and imprisoned for what I did. For killing cultist cannibal raiders. But for what he said next it was hot air.

    The senate still wants no word of this, so we agreed to keep the raid under wraps. When We got the camp to see about the amputees, some had died from suicide. Only a few remained, mostly those who could not, but they asked us to kill them anyway. Julian nor I wanted to, but we did. This was pure injustice. Unadulterated madness. 

    We’re both leaving the desert come January. Not to attest anything before the senate, but instead because our time here is up. The sector is stable enough for the consul.

    This world will not break me yet. But I don’t intend to deny myself justice."

    I wasn’t surprised at the cut short ending or the details within, but I realized in the final words that this wasn’t knowledge to most anyone else. I had to question if Marcus intended this journal for me, or another. Was this world he saw, the world that was beyond the borders of the known and civilized places, where human culture was warped against the circus mirror, then painted against the canvas with the blood of an innocent man? Or was it Marcus just getting unlucky? Seeing the worst there was to see.

    Part of me didn’t want to believe I had even half the details. Or even if Marcus had changed or not. All I knew was this man was beginning to make some sense, here and there

[cilliansaccent]

The Peaky Designer - Cillian Fanfic, Chapter 16

Hello, welcome back. Below is the next instalment of my fanfiction!

Leave a like or a comment if you liked it, or if I can do anything better! Please, it would mean the world and to understand if anyone is enjoying my writing. Also, sharing/reblogging would be even better.

PLEASE READ:

I will not be including Cillian’s family as it’s kinda weird since he has children lmao. Just a mention of his parents and a previous lover.

I will indicate in a chapter if there is smut in the beginning and before the actual scene!!

I will add trigger warnings if there is any!!

There is a variety of levels of swearing during a chapter, I will not hold back, everyone swears.

The timestamp for the Fic is now 2016 and onwards!!

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Background: Gabrijela Babic is a Croatian girl from Sydney, Australia. She is born in the year 1991 on the 24th of December. She studies a Fashion degree in a University with a major in Game Design as well. Her teacher in the fashion designer class managed to nail an Internship on the set of Peaky Blinders with the shows very own Costume Designer, Allison McCosh. There, she travels to London for under a year to learn how to be one, working alongside the actors as well the man she admires, Cillian Murphy. But, her platonic feelings for the man begins to grow into something more, and she wonders whether she should pursue them or let him go for fear of her strict parents and her three older brothers…

Characters:

Swantje Paulina as Gabrijela Babic (swalina on Instagram)

Cillian Murphy

Word Count: 3,497

!!Warnings!!: Major sex scene at the end. 

Date: January 2017

Chapter Name: One Last Time

Brief Chapter Outline: Cillian and Gabrijela spend their last day together doing whatever they can before they end it with some heated passion...

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Cillian's brother dropped them at the airport before he bid farewell to them both. It was another early morning start but they had to get home as early as possible so Gabrijela could start packing and figuring out what to send via post. They checked in, wandered around the airport for a bit and ate before they headed through to the boarding gate. As they sat and waited, Cillian had his arm around her shoulder, his cheek against her head that rested on his shoulder. 

She scrolled through her Instagram, she remembered he had caught her on her fandom account and she was red-faced when she showed him what she posted. It was a multifandom account, and she posted various textposts, fan art and the like of her favourite books or TV Shows. "Still makes me chuckle you posted such old photos of me with those funny captions or whatever you'd call them." Cillian murmured. She rolled her eyes, "Shut up. I was and still am a dedicated fan!" "Well, now you are more than a fan to me." He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Mhm." She tilted her head back and kissed him softly before she resumed her scrolling. But before she was going to tuck her phone away she came across a photo in the explore section of the app. "Oh, good god." She whispered in shock, "Cilly look." She showed him a photo of them both. It was more distanced but blurry so you couldn't make it out who she was really. It was when they were waiting at the airport coming to Cork. "Who took it?" He looked at it, frowning. He knew she wouldn't post anything of their relationship online, they had a talk about it and she was super respectful about it. "No idea. Just says someone had taken it. Maybe it's from Twitter." She felt worry ease into her. She hoped there weren't other sneaky photos of her and Cillian online. She never really said she was going overseas to her online fanbase either, just to her close friends back at home and the ones she made at Uni. "I'm sorry." He said as he ran his hand up and down her arm. "What for?" She looked up at him, confused as to why he would apologise. "For that." He gestured to the photo, "I should have been more thoughtful of those things." He began to let her go. "Cillian, no. Hey," she took his hands as she faced him, "I knew that something like this would happen on the end. I don't want it to ruin what we have." She didn't want him holding back on her when they were out in public. "I don't want you to be plastered all over the internet, either." He squeezed her hands. "I mean, my face is already on the internet. My accounts are not private." She shrugged. "I'll take a look on Twitter but... It doesn't bother me much. Unless you don't want the word going out about you being with someone." "I don't really like the idea of people being too into someone else's life. I'm just concerned about how it would be interpreted by everyone." He said. "Mm. I agree. They can be quite cruel. I've seen how people can react to their idols being with someone else... But again, Cillian, I don't want to like... Not be romantic when we are out in public. I want us to be just us, holding hands and all that. I couldn't care less what online haters would think about." She cupped his jaw. "Are you sure?" He asked. "I am. I can handle it. Besides, if there is an issue, who cares hm? They don't know us." She kissed him lightly. "If you say so." He said as his arm went back around her and they resumed their position. He would still be worried either way.   It was time to board and they detached themselves from each other and picked up their bags. They lined up with the other people, holding hands. She would not let the online images hurt them. When it came to showing affection, she didn't want to hide it. "Um, excuse me," Someone tapped Gab on her shoulder. She turned to see three girls looking at them keenly, "Are you dating Cillian?" She asked, eyes darting to their held hands and to Cillian who also turned to see them. They seemed quite surprised at the sight of Gabrijela, she could see it in their eyes. Cillian had replied instead, "We are. Why do you ask?" "There are rumours online, uh, photos popping up. The fans are uh, going crazy about it. Kinda a big deal, cause no one um... well expected..." She trailed off when Gab and Cillian turned away to get through the gates. Gabrijela gave Cillian a little giggle as they stepped through and headed down the hallway. "Seems like more photos." He said, frowning deeply. "It's fine Cillian, don't stress." She squeezed his hand. They got into the plane and took their seats, this time he was beside the window. The whole ordeal started up again but Cillian comforted her, and she settled faster with his gentle and caring words. She cuddled him throughout the trip, the turbulence was pretty bad as they went through a storm. He wrapped his jacket around her shoulders and made the scarf that she stole from him as a pillow on his shoulder. But after an hour and a half or so, they landed safely and got off the plane. The girls that spoke to them before seemed to follow them. "We got a bit of a party following us," Gabrijela said to Cillian as they headed towards the many taxis that waited. He glanced over his shoulder and chuckled, "It seems so." He hailed down a taxi and got their stuff into the boot before he held open the door for her. "Tough they won't see much anymore." She laughed and got into the car and he got in after her. It was nice to be back home now, they headed upstairs and she laid on his bed, "Ooooo," She groaned, "Cillys bed... So good." She giggled as he crawled up over her, laying down on her but not enough to crush her. He kissed her neck, "You miss it?" He asked. She giggled, "Yeah I did." She turned so she was now looking up at him. She leaned up and kissed him, "We gotta keep moving though. I have to go back to the apartment to pack up the remaining things there and clean up." He nodded and got off her. They had a quick bite before they headed over to her apartment. They packed up whatever she had left behind into his car before they cleaned up the place. She threw out most of the old food that was left behind. The apartment was just like how she came to it. She had taken off the sheets to and left them as a neat pile. She left a wonderful card and a wine behind for the owner of the apartment before she finally said goodbye to the place. Heading back to Cillian's home, she spent it packing up her stuff. But she kept most of her souvenirs in her suitcase all wrapped up in clothing. She didn't want to send it via parcel. She had packed the majority, leaving out her new set of clothing for tomorrow. Every other bits and piece was easy to just shove into her carry-on. Cillian came up the stairs to see how she was going, "Damn you are quick," He said. "Yeah. Just need a scale to weigh the bag." She said. "Got it." He went to the wardrobe and pulled out the scale. They weighed and she had some more room to add a few more clothing in. Now she had two small piles of clothing to send off. "Let's head to the post office now." She said and they headed off. They did what they had to do, and she made sure she was to pay for the fees of the parcel. Since it was a nice day, Cillian decided to take her out to St. James' park to have brunch. He had a blanket in the back and they headed in a nicer part of the park, a little secluded. They set up and Cillian went to a nearby cafe he liked to buy them food. In the meantime, Gabrijela spoke to her dad on the phone and listened to him ask if she had everything packed and whatnot. He would call her in the morning before she would leave as well. She laid back on the blanket, a hand over her tummy. She listened to the hum of the city and the voices of people around her. Cillian returned with a bag, "I'm back. Bit of a hold-up but I'm here." He grinned as he sat down beside her. She sat up, "Thanks babe," She smiled and helped him take the stuff out. "Whatcha get?" "I got us both eggs and bacon, I got you hot chocolate as well. I also got capers for myself." He said. "Thank you," She leaned over and kissed him deeply. "Love you." "Love you too," He said and pecked at her lips before they both dug into their food. They finished up and Cillian disposed of their rubbish before he came back and they laid back together. She snuggled close to his chest, his arm around her shoulders. "I'm gonna miss this," She said, stroking his chest. "Same." He played with her hair, running his fingers through it. "You gonna miss me?" She looked up at him. "Of course I will. So much." He cupped her face. "I will make sure we can talk as much as possible, video and all." She said, leaning up to kiss him. "Sounds good." He murmured, kissing her back. They held each other for a bit like that, totally in their own world as they kissed slowly. They finally broke apart and packed up before he went back to the car to leave the blanket and came back to her. They took a walk around the park and Cillian listened to her talk about how she was going to dread going back in for the last year of her University course. "I've been doing good in my game design as well, so I might see if I can get into that." She said. "Not costume designing?" Cillian asked. "Dunno, I enjoyed it but... I was quite stressed. I don't like the feeling." She laughed softly. "But I'll see." They came back to the car and headed home. When she stepped through the door, Cillian closed it and then pulled her against him. She gasped, "What are you doing?" She laughed as he began to pepper her neck with kisses. "Kissing you." He said, his hands resting on her hips before they snaked up to cup her breasts. "I think you want more than kisses, babe." She moaned softly as he gripped them tightly. She was pushed up against a wall, "Cilly." He kept fondling her breasts, then began to unbutton her blouse and discarded it aside. She smirked and pushed her ass against his crotch, then began to grind against him. "Mmm babe, you like that huh?" She purred. His hands returned to her hips, "I do. Keep doing that love." He watched how she moved against him, his hands now moved back up her sides before he turned her around and kissed her deeply, his fingers tangling in her hair. She moaned as she gripped his shirt, lifting it up before she pulled it over his head. "I want... I want you to use something on me." She blushed, running her hands down his soft skin along his arms. "Yeah? What is it?" He kissed her again. "It's in the bedroom. Let's go there." She took his hand as he picked up their shirts and headed upstairs. She opened up her suitcase and pulled out a black bag. Then she held out an eight-inch long vibrator that was a sparkly purple. "I'm going to be honest, I've never seen them in person." Cillian laughed as he came over, taking it from her. "No?" She raised a brow, "Then where did you see it? In porn?" She brushed past him and laid on the bed, smirking. "Maybe." He chuckled and turned to her, "So you want me to tease you with this?" He turned it on. "Yeah." She nodded, parting her legs despite still got her pants on. He brought it to her crotch, and held it against her and watched how she let out a moan. "Mmm, let's take off these pants first." He said as he waited for her to take her jeans off and throw it aside. He got on the bed, kneeling between her legs as he returned the vibe to her core. She sucked in a breath, gripping the sheets. He had it on a low setting, stroking her up and down through her panties. "Ah..." She laid back, eyes closed as she enjoyed the feeling. "Cilly..." "We should turn it up now, don't want you to enjoy this too much." He said and turned it even higher. She gasped, bringing her legs up. "No, keep them down." He pinned them between his thigh and calves. She whined. Cillian continued to tease her, letting the tip roll over her clit which caused her back to arch then he dragged it back down and then inserted the toy into her. He pushed her leg open with one hand, eyes flicking from her core to her face. "God, Gabrijela." He loved the pleasure on her face, the need and desperation in her eyes. "Cillian! Please! I'm close!" She whined, twisting the sheets in her hands. "Not yet, love. Hold on for me." He said and pushed the toy in and out of her. He let go of her legs and leaned down, and wrapped his lips around her clit and began to suck hard. Her hands shot into his hair, the vibrations of the toy was intense and he kept pushing it against her g-spot. "Fuck! Cillian! Cilly!" She bucked her hips, her screams loud as she came, arching right off the bed. He kept going till she was done, groaning softly as he pulled the toy out, seeing how slick it was with her climax. "Fastest climax ever." He chuckled, kissing up her thigh to sit back. She panted, "I need you in me, Cillian. Oh god." She shook her head. "Mm, but you asked me to use this on you. So I will." He mused, "Lay on your side." She moved to her side as he got behind her, an arm went under her head and locked around her chest. He brought the vibrator back to her clit and began to tease her once more. "N-Not right after a climax! Fuck!" She stayed still for him, she wanted to be good for him. But she couldn't help but buck her hips. "Be still, love. Don't move too much." He kissed her neck, sucking on a spot. She whimpered, clinging to his arms that were around her, god he was relentless as he continued to prod and poke her sensitive clit. But then he decided to push it into her and she arched her back a little. "Cillian!" He claimed her lips once more and kissed her as he thrust the vibrator inside her, she was super slick so it moved in and out swiftly but he could feel when she clenched her walls the vibe got stuck. Gabrijela reached up and dragged her fingers through her hair, "I need you, Cillian, I want you inside me. Please." She begged, rolling her hips. "Yeah? How bad?" He tugged on her bottom lip. "Really bad, Cilly. Please don't make me wait." She could feel his hard cock press against her ass through his jeans. He let out a grunt and got her to hold the vibrator inside her as he pulled off his pants. Then he was back up against her, and removed the vibrator, "Tuck me in, love." He nibbled on her earlobe. She reached between her legs and found his waiting cock, "So hard, baby." She giggled and positioned him to her entrance. Then she tugged him and he was inside her in one swift movement. They both moaned in unison, "Hold your leg up, Gab." He kissed her neck then to her shoulder. She lifted her leg up and he placed the vibrator back on to her clit. She cried out softly, and he felt her walls tighten around him. "Mmm fuck, Gabrijela. Do that again." She nodded and clenched her walls, she could feel every hard inch of him, especially when he started to move. "Shit." She gasped. He kept his eyes focused on her face, enjoying how tight she was and how he managed to drag those cute little sounds from her. He thought about how lucky he was to have her as his girlfriend. He had wished for someone to come into his life and here she was. Here they were, making love. He loved her, truly, he loved her. He could not bring himself to think of any other woman but her. And his heart would hurt when she was no longer warming his bed. Gabrijela looked up, seeing the pure love and devotion in his eyes. "Cillian, I love you." She said through a moan, "I love you so much! Oh!" She could feel her climax start to build again, and this one was gonna be a big one. "I love you too, beautiful. Oh fuck, I love you!" He kissed her hard, pounding hard into her, the bed shaking a little. He will miss her. So he threw aside the vibrator, turning it off and laid her on her back and pushed right back into her with a groan. Her legs locked around his thighs and her arms around his back, her nails digging into his skin. "Fuck! Mark me Gabrijela, fuck." He cursed and kissed her again as her nails scraped down his skin. He moved fast and wild, all he wanted was to please her. Make sure she would feel this for days when she would return back to her home. "Mine!" He cried out, "You're mine, Gabbie." "All yours baby. I'm all yours." She cupped his face and kissed him passionately but it was messy as from his fast thrusting. "I'm gonna cum, Cilly. Oh god, don't stop. Oh please!" Cillian worked hard, panting hard, his moans loud and cracked occasionally before they got faster and faster before his climax tore through him like wildfire. She screamed out his name as she came with him, she felt his warm load fill her inside up as she clenched and locked him in as she finished with him. After some moments they calmed down, but he stayed on top of her and inside her. His head was tucked into her neck and kissing her flushed skin. She ran her hands up and down his back slowly, admiring the curves of his spine and the divots of his muscles in his shoulders. "My handsome man," She whispered, her fingers returning to the nape of his neck and playing with the soft curls of his hair. He let out a soft chuckle, "My beautiful woman." He said as he raised his head to look at her. "My love." He touched her cheek, stroking her skin with a thumb. "I love you with all my heart, Cillian." She said, leaning into the touch. He gave her that breathtaking smile and they kissed for some time, and when they managed to get their breath back they got back into lovemaking. It was slow and gentle, then hard and fast with many different positions. Any position that had her against his body. After they have worn each other out, they bathed and then spent the rest of the afternoon together in his home. He pulled out his guitar and sang for her, then made her the best dinner ever, watched a cute romantic film before they drank red wine in front of the fire. They never parted from each other, every minute they wanted to be close. And despite being worn out, they made love one more time in front of the fire. She rode him till he came twice in her before he lifted her up and carried her to bed. He laid her down and they cuddled naked, she faced him and snuggled into his chest. Today was a wonderful day, and she would remember it forever. "I love you," She said in the dark. "I love you too," Cillian replied, kissing her head before they both fell asleep holding each other.

[stereksecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, @artisticpixie!

*****

Just in Time for Christmas

Stiles’ soulmark was often described as a fox’s tail (he learned to say it like that when he learned there was an actual plant named foxtail that looked nothing like it), it was a reddish swoop near his left shoulder that ended on a white tip.

Stiles didn’t pay much mind to his soulmark, or at least not as much as Scott, who began imagining his own soulmark on any girl he had a crush on. Stiles didn’t see what the point was, there was only one person his soulmark would attach to, and that was his soulmate, whenever they first touched.

The stories about how soulmates meet are a whole Thing. Everyone’s trying to one up each other in how marvelously magical it was. Stiles found it kind of annoying, since most of them really boiled down to “we met, we touched, our soulmarks verified that we were meant for each other.” His own parents’ story was never too embellished. Noah pulled Claudia over and while handing her a ticket for speeding she unsuccessfully tries to charm her way out of they realized they were soulmates.

He still gave her the ticket. Stiles never figured out if that part of the story was true.

So, of course, the guy who felt meeting your soulmate was easy would touch his soulmate and not know who they are.

It wasn’t his fault, ok? There had been a kanima. Jackson, asshole of the year (and of course it would be Jackson’s fault, the guy lived to torment him), had managed to get some random Alpha to bite him. Of course Jackson, asshole of the decade (Stiles was pissed, ok?) did not take to the bite well and began turning into a monster.

Thankfully, there are protocols for things like these. Still, when the scent of omega lured Jackson’s then reptilian ass to The Jungle the call to evacuate created a bit of a panic. Within that panic the lights went off and someone grabbed Stiles’ arm, which made him feel like his heart was about to burst out of his chest and like he needed that hand to stay there for the rest of his life. He thought he was having a panic attack.

Scott found his other arm and pulled him, taking him quickly outside to safety alongside Isaac. Paramedics outside found him, asked what was wrong and Stiles said he was having a panic attack because, in his defense, he did not know what being touched by your soulmate for the first time feels like. One of Beacon Hill’s deputies found him and offered a ride home, since he seemed to only be having a mild panic attack (that wasn’t a panic attack) and the ambulances were needed for people paralyzed by kanima poison.

Stiles went to bed, feeling weird but not understanding why.

Finally, when he saw himself shirtless in the mirror next morning, he understood. His soulmark was there, the familiar red and white swoop, but now another swoop had joined it. This one was jet black and circled around his own like a shield. 

There are stories of people in similar situations to Stiles’ but most of them were romance novels where the circumstances for it were laughable and the soulmarks pulled both of them to meet quickly. Stiles felt no pull, just an absence.

He woke up and expected someone to be there. Grabbed his phone and expected to be able to call someone to tell them how his day had gone. His heat came and no toy was good enough. It’s like his body knew he had an Alpha. Which he did. He just didn’t know where that Alpha was.

It’s not like he hadn’t tried to find him. He had gone to back to The Jungle often, but the staff there had said that no lone Alpha had come with the same problem. The newspaper had a section in which people who thought destiny needed a hand in putting soulmates together would publish their own soulmarks and wait for people who thought might make a good match for them to contact them. Stiles didn’t know if it worked for those people, but it certainly didn’t work for him.

It’s not like Beacon Hills was that large of a town. The rumor mill would be bound to turn up another person looking for their soulmate at some point. His father asked the nosiest of his deputies and none had an answer. For a moment Stiles worried that Jackson, asshole of the century, had managed to kill his soulmate but no one had died during the incident.

Stiles was close to simply parading the town shirtless and hope for the best. He only didn’t because although the incident had happened in June, it was now December and way too cold to be parading around town shirtless.

He also didn’t do it because a sad voice inside him was telling him that his soulmate was out there, and he knew who he was, and was thanking all his stars that he had managed to get away from him the way he did.

Stiles knew he wasn’t a model omega. For starters, he deeply questioned the idea of a model omega and had written a long piece for an op-ed on the town’s local news website on how that idea was more a cultural than biological thing. He had gotten some hate mail out of that. He was loud, he didn’t have the graceful coordination omegas were supposed to have, and he reacted to authority figures with a mixture of mockery and anger.

When he shared this with his father, somewhere in the middle of December, the older beta hugged him tightly. “Don’t even think that, any Alpha, beta, or omega would be lucky to have you.”

Stiles wiped his nose on his sleeve. “But it’s been almost half a year. Why haven’t they tried to find me?”

“Maybe they have, just in a place you wouldn’t usually think of,” his father answered. “Come on, it’s like you to give up.”

Stiles nodded, calming down.

“I just wish I could find them before my heat this January,” Stiles added. “Last one was unbearable.”

His father nodded, obviously still worried. “By the way,” he said, “what would you think of spending Christmas Eve at the Hales?”

Stiles perked up a little at that. “The Hales? They invited you?”

“They invited us,” Noah corrected. “When I told Laura’s mother we would be spending the holiday alone, she insisted.”

Usually they’d spend it with Scott and Melissa, but they had booked a cruise to warmer weathers. 

“Sounds great!” I’ll bake a pie or something.

“I’m sure Talia had that in mind when he invited us.”

Talia Hale, Alpha of the Hale pack, had a sweet tooth. So did her children, and Stiles’ confections at any bake sale they happened to appear were always praised by her. Alpha Talia was also a rarity in that all of her children were Alphas. Laura, who would replace her mom after she retired. Derek, the most handsome man in all of Beacon Hills as far as Stiles was concerned. Cora, the most intimidating girl Stiles had ever met. And even the youngest, George.

Stiles, like almost any omega in Beacon Hills, enjoyed seeing any of them around town. They were all beautiful and nice, unlike other Alphas who seemed to always be close to brawling to show superiority.

Stiles would usually spot Derek around town always doing something to help someone. Once he saw him carrying some furniture, apparently helping a younger couple move into their new apartment. His arms flexing ever so temptingly. He had been driving to see his father with a healthy lunch otherwise he would’ve stopped and stared. More. There had also been that time when he walked out of his house and saw Derek mowing the neighbor’s lawn. Shirtless. Stiles got on his jeep and fled the scene before Derek saw him drooling. No use getting too attached to that scene, anyway, Derek had already found his soulmate. Laura had told his dad as much when he asked her.

Which was a shame because Derek, as far as Stiles was concerned, was the perfect Alpha. Tall but not too tall. Wide and muscular but more like a fitness model than a bodybuilder.  And while he was usually seen with his trademark frown, his smile was dazzling. Stiles had spent more than one heat imagining those strong hands on him.

“I’ll make a pecan pie, she seemed to like that at the Fall Festival,” Stiles mused, grateful for the distraction. He enjoyed baking, not only because it seemed to do wonders against his anxiety but also because at some point he had felt that was the only thing he had to convince his soulmate he was worth keeping. He was a bit better in the self esteem department nowadays, but he still hoped for the day he could make his soulmate the perfect birthday cake.

After some digging around for special recipes and deciding he would wow the town’s Alpha before asking for her help on finding his lost soulmate, Stiles landed on a bourbon pecan pie recipe that looked too good not to make. He learned from his father that Laura liked cheesecake and that sounded way too much like a sneaky way to make him bring cheesecake, so he obliged.

So, on the early afternoon of the 24th, Stiles and Noah rang the bell to the Hale mansion. Noah had a cheesecake on one hand and a bourbon pecan pie in the other. Stiles had yet another bourbon pecan pie, because he remembered the Hales were a large family, and a box filled with gingerbread wolves in the other.

“I may have overdone it,” Stiles said to his dad for the twentieth time that day.

“I don’t think they’ll mind,” he answered. The door opened and Talia Hale herself was there to greet them.

“Noah, you made it! We’re so glad you’re here. Come in, come in. Cora, take their coats. And what’s this? Pecan pie! Two of them! I’m tempted to keep one all to myself, they smell so lovely. George, please take these to the kitchen, we’ll bring them out for dessert. And cheesecake? Did Laura ask for this? Of course she did, I’m sure. Cora, take it to the kitchen, too, and don’t let Laura stick her finger in it. Come with me, we’re in the living room at the moment but I heard Claudia’s jeep approaching and I simply had to be the first to greet you. Derek can bring some mulled wine or hot cocoa to warm you up. Derek? Derek why are you standing there like that?”

Stiles stopped when he saw him, not understanding why Derek was looking at him so intensely. Derek was famous for how his look could stop other werewolves in their tracks, but this wasn’t a look of anger at all.

“Stiles?” Noah’s voice was low but just as hopeful as the omega’s own heart felt.

Derek walked towards Stiles, slowly but surely. The noise from the living room seemed to have vanished, and Stiles could only hear the thumping of his own heart, apparently in rhythm to Derek’s footsteps. Stiles noticed the way his jeans hugged his strong legs, the way his chest stretched the sweater he was wearing, just like his arms filled up the sleeves so nicely. Derek had let his beard grow ever so slightly, and it framed his lips perfectly. His green eyes were focused on him like none had ever been before.

“I knew it was you,” he said in a low voice, his hand reaching to touch Stiles’ cheek. The moment Derek’s fingers made contact Stiles nodded, because it was obvious. Because it was true. Stiles would’ve dropped the box of cookies to jump into Derek’s arms had Talia not stopped them.

“Derek,” she said, firm. “You will behave yourself. You know he’s mated.”

Stiles felt like he could hear a record scratch at the sound of that statement. He turned to her.

“I’m not mated,” he said. “I mean, I am, kind of, but-”

“You said he had found his soulmate.” Laura had, at some point, appeared next to them and was looking at Noah.

“I said it was complicated,” Noah answered, defensively.

“You said you had talked to him.” It was now Talia who looked accusingly at Laura.

“I did!” Laura almost yelled. “Kinda,” she added, lower.

The argument went on, each trying to figure what had happened. Stiles himself was curious, but he was ok with figuring out later. Right now, Derek’s hand had found his hip and when he turned to face him, the Alpha was looking at him like he was the only thing that mattered in the whole world. Stiles felt sure that his eyes said the same thing.

Stiles moved his hand to rest on Derek’s shoulders and when they kissed Stiles could only think two things:

1) He felt like if they took a photo of them now, it would look like a cover for one of those cheesy romantic novels, but Christmas themed. Both of them wearing sweaters, Stiles holding a box of gingerbread wolves on one hand, while standing on a tastefully decorated hallway. It would probably have an awfully appropriate title like “Home for the Holidays” or “Just in time for Christmas.”

2) Every single sickly sweet description on how it felt to kiss your soulmate for the first time on those novels was right. It was like falling into syrup. It was like a thousand boxes of your favorite cookie. It was like falling asleep into a dream you’d always want to go back to. 

When they finally broke the kiss, Derek rested his forehead on Stiles’ and inhaled deeply. Stiles chuckled, loving the way Derek’s arms wrapped around him.

Talia cleared her throat, and both of them turned to her like this was the hundredth time she had found them making out, lost to anything and anyone else, and not the first. Noah and Laura were both there, smiling embarrassedly, and so was George, his cell phone out no doubt to post a picture to annoy Derek with later.

“George,” Derek said, “I will break your phone.”

“Not before he shares the picture,” Cora said. “Now could you please come over to the living room? Or at least let Stiles give me the cookies before you take him up to your room?”

“He can take Stiles to his room after dinner,” Talia said. “Now, if you please, Derek, some mulled wine for Noah while I introduce Stiles to the rest of the family.”

They share a small kiss and Stiles walks into a living room of smiling faces. The story comes together in pieces. Stiles would’ve found it frustrating if he wasn’t riding a massive high from kissing Derek.

After Derek touched Stiles, he was torn. On the one hand he could feel his soulmate being taken away, on the other he had to make sure people got out safely. He had stayed outside Jungle, hoping for his omega to come back and finally left, sad but determined to find him. 

He returned to Jungle, but never thought of leaving a message with the staff. He felt foolish, telling someone he had found his mate and had let them go. He relied on Laura as part of the Beacon Hills police department, but after he had learned Stiles was already mated his drive waned.

Had he known Stiles was also looking for his lost soulmate, Derek would’ve shown up at his door, but instead he simply waited for the day he could meet the lucky person that was mated to the author of one of his favorite op-eds in the local news website. He had done a couple of questionable things in his quest to get close to Stiles, like offering to mow the lawn of one of the Stilinski’s neighbors. He of course did it shirtless because if Stiles, like he supposed, matched his soulmark; he was bound to notice it then.

Each detail on how they kept on missing each other made the people in the leaving room groan with frustration or howl with laughter. Derek had dropped the couch he was holding seconds after Stiles had left the scene of the move, distracted by the feeling of his mate close by.

“Oh, god, did you hurt yourself?” Stiles asked.

“Dropped the couch on his foot,” Erica, a friend of the family said, and everyone laughed. “Thank the stars for werewolf healing.”

Their story blurs into the background as the other couples share the stories of how they met, and when Derek sits beside Stiles it’s too easy for him to lean into his warmth. Under the watchful eye of their parents (and the teasing eyes of Derek’s siblings) it’s hard to not just excuse themselves so they can make out for a while, see each other’s soulmarks on each other.

Seats are shuffled for dinner so they can sit together, and after dessert, when everyone is done complimenting Stiles’ pie and cheesecake (and more than one comment on how they expect more baked good from him is made) the Hales’ extended family retires to guest rooms and hotels. Noah correctly guesses Stiles will stay over, and Talia tells Derek he doesn’t have to do the dishes this time, George and Cora had volunteered.

“Don’t be too grateful,” she says at Derek’s surprise. “They also posted several photos of the two of you looking at each other like loons.”

Stiles laughs, both at that and Derek’s frown. The Alpha looks at him and his face instantly softens. “You’re adorable,” he says.

“Thanks,” Stiles says, blushing.

“I mean that literally,” Derek states. “You’re worthy of adoration. You’re beautiful, funny, and-”

“Derek,” Cora yells from the kitchen. “We offered to do the dishes precisely so you could do this lovey dovey bs in your room where it’s soundproofed.”

Derek laughs and takes Stiles hands, leading him upstairs. Derek’s bedroom is large, with a queen size bed on one side and a desk on the other. Derek apologizes for the mess and by “mess” Stiles assumes he means the two socks that aren’t in the hamper. Derek closes the door and the kiss they share this time is soft and tender, like a the nuzzle of a mate coming home to their den. Derek guides them to his bed.

They take off their shoes and begin undressing each other slowly. Derek is wearing a button shirt and Stiles says “Merry Christmas to me” as he begins to unbutton it. He pulls on it to reveal Derek’s soulmark and his own, both of them together in Derek’s body the same way they are on his. As sure as he was, as right as it had felt to be with Derek the whole day, it was nice to have visual confirmation. Stiles plants a kiss on it and Derek growls low before forcing Stiles out of his own shirt. He stared at the soulmark on Stiles’ body adoringly before licking a stripe from it to Stile’s neck, where he sucks, apparently intent on leaving a mark.

“I’m already marked as yours, you know,” Stiles giggles, but stretches his neck.

His words seem to affect Derek, and the Alpha stops.

“Everything ok?” Stiles asks.

Derek nods, and arranges them so he’s spooning Stiles. He hugs the omega tightly and inhales deeply. Stiles turns his head awkwardly until they face each other.

“I feel your anxiety, you know?” Stiles says. “It’s like mine but different.”

“It’s dumb,” Derek says.

“Anxiety usually is.” Stiles plants a kiss on Derek’s nose. “Tell me.”

“I thought you didn’t want me,” Derek says. “I thought you’d made up an Alpha to keep me away. I thought you thought I was grumpy and mean and-”

Stiles kisses his Alpha, not only because it hurts him to imagine a world where he would be stupid enough not to want Derek, but also because he can’t express with words how wrong he is. Derek returns the kiss, and he seems to get the message.

“I also thought, you know, something like that,” Stiles confesses when they break the kiss. “I thought maybe the Alpha had seen me from a distance and ran away, glad to have dodged this bullet.”

“You’re kidding,” Derek says. “You’re perfect.”

“You say that now but just wait until you have to deal with an actually messy room, or half an hour of anxious blabbering because I have a doctor’s appointment later that day.”

Derek grins.

“No, really, you’re all grins now but one of these days you’re gonna walk in on me unshowered, half panicked because of some deadline or the other with a half-eaten box of cookies in one hand and then what will you do?”

“Good question. I think I’d take that half eaten box of cookies and put it away to eat later, I’d make you some tea to calm you down and help you meet your deadline, and then I would shower with you to fuck any remaining worries out of you.”

Stiles is for once, speechless.

“Does that sound good?”

Stiles nods.

Derek kisses him again, and this time he doesn’t stop. Stiles is glad the room is soundproof because he didn’t know he could be that loud for that long. Derek looks unbearably smug the next morning.

“Stop it,” Stiles says, once he’s awake enough.

“Stop what?” Derek asks innocently. He’s wearing flannel pajamas and enjoying the sight and smell of Stiles wearing one of his shirts.

“Stop staring at me like that. I’m human, your werewolf stamina is gonna have to wait a little longer.”

Derek laughs. “Yeah, specially since mom wants us down for breakfast. Come on, we can shower together, it’ll be my birthday present.”

Stiles rolls his eyes. “Christmas present, Derek. It’s Christmas.”

“It’s also my birthday,” Derek says, pulling Stiles to the edge of the bed.

“Wait, really?”

It takes an emergency run to the only store open in town but Stiles manages to bake his soulmate the perfect birthday cake. Or at least the first birthday cake, Stiles is sure he can improve the recipe for next year.

——

A little extra: The Conversation between Noah and Laura

“You seem frazzled, boss,” Laura said leaving a cup of coffee on Noah’s desk. The sheriff nodded.

“Stiles found his soulmate, but it’s complicated,” he said before taking a sip from his mug.

Laura sighed, enjoying her own cup of coffee. “Yeah, the same thing happened to my brother just yesterday.”

“I don’t think the same thing that happened to my son could happen to two people.”

Laura laughed. “Same with my brother.”

Before either of them could ask the other to elaborate, Officer Parrish yelled there were donuts in the break room.

Six months later both will insist that they said much more than that. But they didn’t.

[gracelcssx]

okay so i tried to resist taking up a third muse but i cracked. so here's my third bby who is an angel 99% of the time.

(bruná marquezine , twenty seven, female, she/her ) Did anyone else just see HANA FAUST? I hear for the FAUST family (non blood) they can be a bit JEALOUS &  BLUNT. But I also heard they can be KIND HEARTED & LOVING. If you dare I hear they frequent FATES in their spare time when they aren’t being an FASHION DESIGNER. Tread carefully or else you might be next on their list !

BASIC INFORMATION           FULL NAME: hana faust           NICKNAME(S): none           PREFERRED NAME(S):  hana           BIRTH DATE: december 24th           AGE:  twenty seven           ZODIAC: capricorn           GENDER: female           PRONOUNS: she/her           ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: heteromantic           SEXUAL ORIENTATION: heterosexual           NATIONALITY: american           ETHNICITY: Brazilian [Portuguese, Italian, African, possibly other]           CURRENT LOCATION: chicago, illinois           OCCUPATION: fashion designer BACKGROUND        - born to two eighteen years old on christmas eve in salem boston, massachusetts, hana never had the chance to be with her biological parents. shortly after her mother got to hold her and give her a name, she was given up immediately due to her parents being too old.     - for the first six years of her life, it was spent in the foster system. going from home to home, state tp state. from massachusetts to california for hana, it was almost as if no one wanted her. which lead to her not trusting anyone who fostered her.     - come six years old and in chicago with her then foster family. it wasn’t…..great. the ‘foster father’ wasn't nice at all. in a sense, hana wasn't treated very nice either. that one fateful night, after seeing how violent he got when he was drunk, the six year old hana packed up what clothes and ran away. to her, leaving that house was better than staying there. staying there was a death sentence waiting to happen.     - it wasn’t long after that, that she was taken in by mama and papa faust. for a six year old, she didn’t trust anyone yet. for the first few months with the family, she felt like an outsider. not feeling like apart of the family.     -  over the following months afterwards though, she slowly but surely started to feel at home there. for once, it felt like she had a real family who loved her despite being 'adopted’ in a way.     - when it came to her birthday, she pretty much told everyone that they didn’t have to get her anything. she was fine with what she had. even if it wasn’t a lot that she took from the previous place she was at.     - the years following that, she settled in perfectly. when it came to school, she went to the public schools. it was during high school though that she grew an interest in fashion design. when she was sixteen, she designed her first outfit and had it made. when she wore it to school, she got a lot of compliments for it.     - it was also during her high school years that hana had her first real boyfriend. the two started off as best friends but that turned into something more by the end of their freshman year. to say, he was hanas first love. her first everything in a sense.     - after graduating a year later, and getting accepted into parsons school of design, she ended up going to new york for six years to study there.  before leaving though, she and her now ex boyfriend (high school sweet heart) ended things mutually.     - for six years, hana studied her butt off at the school. learning everything she could about fashion design. to her, it was the one thing she wanted to do after graduating. during the summers while she attended parsons, she would spend them at home. or she would stay in new york.     - six years later and after spending a lot of time studying and learning, hana finally graduated with her degree. after that, she went home for a few months before returning to new york. to her, returning to start her career meant she could get a foothold within the fashion industry.     - for at least two and a half years, hana lived in new york. going from  'the one to watch' to 'one of the top fashion designers' it made her proud. it was after that, that she decided to move home. buying a run down house, she had it renovated to her liking.     - a month after moving back, hana was in a car accident. it wasn't a bad one, but it did cause her to stay in the hospital.  from it, she ended up having a broken wrist and a badly sprained ankle.     - two years ago, hana found her birth parents. and through them found out that she had three younger siblings.  after finding them, she made an effort to get to know them. OTHER FACTS     - despite being a famous fashion designer, she does love to cook in her spare time. though the chances of her cooking for anyone outside of her family is slim to none.     -  she doesn't like to involve herself in what her family does. with having a successful career, she tends to focus on that more than anything else.     - she L O V E S christmas. it's her favorite holiday. and not because her birthday is on christmas eve. its her favorite because it brings family together. and well, because of christmas music too.     - she honestly might look sweet and innocent but she's not afraid to call one out or put them in their place if she needs to.     - with her biological family living in chicago now, hana splits her time up between spending time with her adopted family and with her biological family. - hana has introduced her biological parents to her adopted siblings and cousins. everyone else though in her life? not yet. - as of recent, hana has been seeing a therapist ever since a week or two after st.patricks day. only one person knows about it. POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS:     close friends: people who she's close friends with and who don't use her for free clothing.     frenemies: pretty simple.  they fight one moment, and are arguing the next. roommate: this person would either be a faust, a civillian or someone hana knows and trusts.

[all-the-love-harold]

Chapter 2 - Let It Snow

It’s a very christmassy Chapter 2 for you all to enjoy! As always I have @lovesmelikebrandnewstarlight to thank for helping this chapter happen. Let me know how you’re liking the re-write so far! 

Master Post 

December 2013,

 London in December was everything that Poppy dreamed it would be. There was a sense of magic in the air everywhere she went and for the first time since she was about eleven she actually felt festive. She spent her evenings curled up by the fireplace watching Christmas films with Harry, when he was around, and her days running around the city between classes and christmas shopping. There was a sense of bittersweetness to it all though, she missed home and all the talk about christmas only made her miss her family. Her plans had always been to go home for christmas, but things with her apartment fell through after two months of living with Harry and all the money that she would have spent on a plane ticket now had to go towards a deposit on a new apartment, which would be ready before her birthday in February. Living with Harry had been a whirlwind for Poppy, she’d made a friend for life, someone she could call at 2pm for a chat or crawl into bed with at 2am for a snuggle because she was missing home. They told each other everything, from the crazy stories that Harry shared about life on the road to Poppy’s miserable attempts at dating, they knew everything about each other and that’s why Harry knew something was up when Poppy hadn’t arranged her flights home by mid December. He gave her a few extra days to bring it up herself, but by the time the 19th rolled around and she didn’t look like she had even started packing anything he decided to bring it up.

“You know how much I love having you around, don’t you Pop?” he said to her as he sat next to her watching ‘Love Actually’ for the third time this week

“Mmm” she nodded to focused on the film

“But you also know how much you love your family?”

“I do love them, yeah, where are you going with this H?” she muted the TV and looked at him

“Are you heading home for christmas?”

“Oh” Poppy sighed “I can’t afford it since I put that deposit on the new flat”

“Do you want to go home, because you know all you have to do is ask and I’ll get you a ticket?”

Poppy thought for a moment, as festive as she felt, she knew when christmas day rolled around she’d feel pretty miserable because everything over here was so different and cold and she’d probably end up spending it alone, but she’d already taken enough from Harry, she couldn’t let him buy her a plane ticket too.

“No” she shook her head “I can’t ask you to do that”

“Well I’m offering, but if you don’t want to go, you can come to cheshire with me”

“I’m already invading your house, I’m not going to invade your family christmas too”

“There’s no way I’m letting my best friend spend christmas alone” Harry said, matter of factly, “so if you’re staying in England either you’re coming to cheshire or I’m going to stay here”

Poppy leant her head on Harry’s shoulder and nodded “Guess I’m going to Cheshire then”

“Great!” Harry said, excitement evident in his voice “We leave early Tuesday morning”

***

December 24th,

 The days in London at this time of the year were short and the afternoons were dark and cozy. Made for snuggles by the fireplace with a warm cup of tea with some homemade shortbread. And with the promise of just that waiting for them when they arrived in Cheshire, Harry and Poppy set off early on Tuesday morning. For Poppy the three hour trip was nothing that she hadn’t done before, it was only half of the trip that she’d take back home to visit her grandparents once a month. Harry on the other hand, had to stop every hour because despite all the travelling he’d done this year, three hours was just too much. The last hour of the trip went by the quickest as they sang along to christmas songs with wide smiles glued to their faces. By the time arrived the guilty feeling that sat in Poppy’s stomach since she called her mum to say she wasn’t coming home, had disappeared and she was filled with christmas cheer.

 This wasn’t the first time that Poppy would be meeting Anne, that happened only two days after she’d landed in London, when One Direction just so happened to have a show at the O2 arena that Harry had forced her to go to, and since then Anne had welcomed Poppy with open arms. When Harry pulled up in Anne’s driveway, she was already out the front waiting for them and Harry let out a slight chuckle at the sight of her in her christmas jumper.

“Hope you have one of those for all of us” he said as he stepped out of the car

“I have better one’s for you two” she winked at Poppy.

“How are you Anne?” Poppy said, stretching her arms out and embracing Anne in a warm hug

“Oh I’m good beautiful girl, how are you, first Christmas away from home?” Anne pulled away from the hug but kept hold of Poppy’s shoulders, holding her at arms length so that she could make eye contact.

“I’m ok, it’s already Christmas Day back home, so I’ll give my family a call soon” Poppy smiled.

Anne nodded “You make yourself at home while you’re here dear, what’s ours is yours” she turned towards Harry and greeted him as any mother would greet her son that she hadn’t seen in months, with a hug that lasted what felt like five minutes and dozens of kisses on the cheek.

“Alright Mum” Harry giggled, “That’s enough, poor Poppy’s freezing, she’s not used to this cold.”

“Oh right of course” Anne said shaking her head “I forgot, the fire’s on inside, let’s go in an get you both warm”

Living in London was completely different from living in Sydney. For starters, if Poppy was in Sydney right now, she’d probably be in shorts and a t-shirt on her way to the beach on a hot summer's afternoon. But instead it was 4:30 in the afternoon and the sun had already gone down and Poppy was curled up on the couch under a fluffy blanket, snuggled up to Harry with a hot chocolate cupped in her hands, watching as snow fell outside.

“Is the first time you’ve seen snow Poppy?” Harry’s sister Gemma asked

Poppy shook her head “It snowed once back home, I think I would have been about four, my brother and I walked outside in our pyjamas and no shoes, Mum has a photo of us laughing at how cold our feet were.” Talking about her family usually made Poppy feel homesick, but right now, she felt more at home than she had all year, and part of her knew that that had everything to do with being wrapped in Harry’s arms.

****

Anne went all out for christmas lunch, there was a turkey and a roast beef and enough peas to feed a small village, although Poppy quickly learned that that small village was in fact just Harry. The table was decorated with festive foliage and ornaments galore, and Poppy was sat next to Gemma who couldn’t stop asking her about Australian christmas.

“So you don’t have a cooked meal like this?” she asked, curious about how the holiday is celebrated on the other side of the equator

“No” Poppy said simply “It’s usually a barbeque, with a honey glazed ham and a ton of salad followed by a pavlova and in my family, a mango cheesecake”

“Mango Cheesecake?” Harry chimed in “That sounds delicious”

“It’s pretty much the best thing ever” Poppy laughed “I’ll make you one when mangoes are in season here”

The food was everything that Poppy had always imagined a traditional christmas meal would be and at this point she was a little annoyed that Harry hadn’t introduced her to yorkshire pudding sooner.

When everyone had finished eating, Anne and Robin cleared the plates from the table and put their santa hats on.

“Right, everyone over near the tree, it’s present time” Robin said in a low bellow that could very well have been the voice of father christmas.

They all sluggishly moved over to the tree and sat down on the couch with their drinks still in their hands. Poppy wasn’t expecting any gifts for herself given that she was there on such short notice but she was pleasantly surprised when Robin called her name and handed her a bag full of gifts from everyone. Gemma gave her a candle that she’d found in a quirky london store that smelt like “Australian Summer” and Anne and Robin got her some Marc Jacobs perfume that Harry must of told them she wears regularly but it was Harry’s gift that surprised her the most, it was simply a card with a picture of a “P” drawn on somebody’s skin resting inside with “My next Tattoo” written on the back. Underneath the picture there was a message that read:

My Dearest Poopy,

Thank you for everything you do for me and everything that you are. I know you’re moving out soon and my house won’t be the same without you but this friendship will last a lifetime, I’m sure of it.

I’ll always hold you close to my heart.

Merry Christmas

All my Love Always, Hairy xx

 With their bellies full of the mouth watering meal that Anne had made for them, they retired to the living room where Harry immediately put on Michael Buble’s esteemed christmas album and started singing along.

“Oh the weather outside is frightful” he sang, holding his hand out to Poppy and pulling her into dance

“But the fire is so delightful” Poppy sang back, pointing to the open fire next to them

“And since we’ve got no place to go” Gemma joined from the couch

“Let it snow, Let it snow let it snow!” they all sang together.  

With a glass of mulled wine in her hand, Poppy sang and danced the night away, and not once did she even think about what she was missing out back home because she knew that she had all she needed right here; A best Friend who would do anything for her, and his family who had taken her in as their own.

[dgarski]

​One year back In the early morning hours of January 23, 2020, I set off to find my way back home to Florida. It was a monumental moment in my life as it represented growth, perseverance, determination and strength. The road was long behind me and before me. I had been through my version of hell. Now, it was time to go home. Healing

The time it takes to heal can vary from person to person, depending on the wound. Some may never fully recover, while others heal in a relatively short period of time. Sometimes, physical recovery isn't necessarily the only part of the healing process. The mind itself might need far more time to heal. In some cases, this could take many years, or never at all. I think that time truly does have a way of slowly healing most wounds; at least to some degree. The way we perceive hurting physically as well as mentally, can change dramatically over time. Allowing ourselves the time to grieve and process the pain, can help us move forward, and get on with our lives.

Loss

When we are recovering from a dramatic  change in our life, a significant loss may be connected with this change. We might lose ourselves. We might lose our identity, our purpose or in a worst-case scenario, we might lose our will to continue on. Some might never regain their will to move forward; and instead fall slowly into deep despair and depression. When we lose something or someone, there is a period of time that we must process the mourning. There is no statute of limitations for this time period. Depression

Depression is a very real sickness for millions of people. Once thought of by many, as nothing more than an excuse for someone to be lazy or non-productive, it has since become more recognized as a significant illness, studied through education and research. Depression has a way of pinning you down when you are already on the ground. It can feel like a tremendous weight covering you from head to toe. Time seems to feel insignificant. The days and nights seem to pass without measure. For some, sleeping and hiding in the dark, seem to be the only viable escape from the pain of reality. Sometimes, prescribed medication can have a negative effect on the body, both physically and mentally. It takes a great deal of strength to pull oneself out of the darkness and into the light. Unfortunately, not everyone has this strength.

Recovery and finding strength

Once the healing and recovery process has begun, it becomes a very long road to wander. With help and understanding from family and friends, this process can be expedited. The decision to heal, by finding inner strength, determination and perseverance, can make a world of difference in the duration of the recovery. Having an attainable goal and unconditional support, will help make a world of difference in the healing and recovery process.

Stages

I went through all of these stages of healing and recovery, for ten months in 2019. I went through depression, anxiety, anger (lots of anger), identity crisis and loss of purpose. I was completely lost. I had to learn that processing all that had happened to me, was going to take a long time and a lot of patience to get through. Something deep inside me, something I never knew existed, literally took over my life and pushed me to get through some of the worst days, weeks and months of my life.

Old stomping grounds In those beginning months between March and July of 2019, I took long walks around my old neighborhood. I walked to the beach and sat down on a bench and stared out at Lake Michigan. I wondered how my life had gotten to that point. How in the world did I lose everything, and somehow end up in Wisconsin? How did my entire life just get completely erased? How was I ever going to get it back? I knew I didn't belong in Racine anymore than anyone in Racine belonged in Florida. Racine was my home when I was growing up. I felt like a complete stranger in my old home town. So much had changed since I moved to Florida. Once I had been cleared by my doctor to drive again, I got my freedom back. I drove around town to places I hadn't seen in well over three decades. My memories of what used to be, were quickly shattered by the realities of just how much had dramatically changed, so drastically. Ironically, as much change as there was, so much more still remained the same as it had always been. The more I saw, the less I wanted to see. I had to find a way to make a lot of money, and make it fast.

Going back to work Once I had made up my mind about my goals to make as much money as possible, in as little time as possible, I set out to work as many hours as I could, plan as much as I could, and figure out a way to get my life back, by moving my life back home to Florida. Once I began working, I went into an almost out of body approach to getting through the next few months. I was on 24/7 auto-pilot. Work, eat, sleep, repeat. I honestly never knew I had it in me to push myself so hard. I had never been so motivated in my life. The more I worked, the closer I was to leaving.

Winter

Winter came, and I shoveled snow for the first time in over 30 years. It was also the first time I had driven in snow, in over 30 years. I had to relearn how to do it. Some things, you just never forget. The cold was almost unbearable. I was always shivering. I have always hated winter, no matter where I was. Except on my days off, the only time I saw daylight was when I was working. I'd go to work at 4am, and it would be dark outside. I would leave work at 4pm and the sun had already set. I was in a mental mode of pushing through, regardless of how uncomfortable I was. I had to tough it out as long as I could. I had an ultimate goal in place, and there was no turning back.

Finding my new home The holidays came and went, and I finished my work days at the hospital. I saved enough money to move back to Orlando. Now, I just needed to find a place to live. My last day of work was on January 4th. The next couple of weeks would be about me finding an apartment in Orlando. I was on the phone and the computer, nearly every waking moment I had. It was a frustrating endeavor, but I didn't give up. Finally, I found something that would prove to be the place where I would call my next home. Leaving

Everything was finalized and ready to go. My new apartment was waiting for me. I was to move in on the 24th. This meant that I had to leave in the early morning hours of the 23rd. I planned, I packed, I mapped, I collected, I prepared, and I got almost no sleep. I hadn't been this excited in years! I was remembering doing this very thing, in February of 1988, the first time I moved to Florida. This time, it was different. I was only going to be able to take with me what I could fit inside my tiny car. The rest, I would have to come back for at a later date. I loaded up my car and filled every possible space I had inside and in the top rack carrier. The car was ready, I was ready and so it was time to go. I wanted to disappear quietly, like a thief in the night. I said goodbye to my family and I set out, in front of an oncoming blizzard, at 12:30 in the morning.

Hitting the road

I waved to my parents as they stood in front of the big picture window in the living room. The snow had already started coming down, but I was pretty sure that I would be ahead of the onslaught before it got to the great lakes area. I stopped at the gas station, programmed the Waze app to guide me back to Florida, then set out to the interstate. I remember thinking how terrifying this actually was, and how anything could happen to me at any time. Somehow, that feeling of terror slowly disappeared the further south I drove. Leaving so early in the morning, meant that traffic in an oncoming blizzard would be minimal. No sleep

The hours before I left, I tried to sleep. I think I slept an hour or two. I was pumping on adrenaline the first 8 hours of driving. By the time I got to Kentucky, the sun was already up, but the exhaustion was beginning to make my eyes close at 65mph. I had to stop and get some rest. I pulled over at a wayside, somewhere in the mountains of western Kentucky. I parked down to the end of the lot, away from the bulk of tourists and other motorists. I fell asleep for about two and a half hours. I woke up and started the car and got back out on the road. As soon as I got to Nashville, the rains came. It rained all the way down to Georgia.. I stopped several times to try to sleep, but I needed to actually lay down. I could not do that in my car because it was packed so full. Instead, I took short naps and continued on.

Florida

On January 24, 2020, I crossed the Georgia/Florida border at around 5am. A couple of hours into Florida, the sunrise came. It would be the first Florida sunrise I would see in over ten months. My eyes welled up and I smiled. I knew that I was only a few hours from Orlando. The morning rush hour was in full swing. The traffic was a bit of a challenge. I made it to the Florida turnpike and headed towards Orlando. Slowly, things started to become more recognizable. I exited onto the 408 tollway, and headed east towards town. I was home!

Moving in

I pulled into the parking lot of the apartment complex just before 10am. I met with the office manager and we finalized the paperwork for my apartment. I moved all of my stuff from my car into the apartment. I had nothing in the way of food or cooking utensils or housewares, so as exhausted as I was, I went to the only grocery store I could think of, which was Target. I was running on instinct by this time. I was so overly tired that I just ran on auto-pilot, again. I purchased as many things that I could think of and spent almost $150.00. The apartment turned out to be a very old, disappointing shoe box, but it was home. I finally had my independence back. Going back to work

Getting my job back, was nearly effortless. Everything fell right into place. I was able to get my security license renewed in about 20 minutes. I then drove over to the office and met with my bosses. We finished the transfer paperwork and I got a start date for retraining. Everyone was so welcoming. I had my identity back. I went to training and started my OJT. I got my new schedule, and now I had my purpose back. I must have told my story to a hundred people at work. I answered a thousand questions. I shook hands, got hugs and a lot of congratulations for cheating death and making it back.

The Beach 2020 was a year that most will never forget. It certainly wasn't what I was expecting to come back to. I had a list of things I wanted to do, but the bullshit virus halted just about everything. I did make it to the beach, once. I did the best that I could to comply with what some were calling, "the new normal", even though there was nothing normal about any of it. The day I made it to the beach, I saw hundreds of beach-goers there, and none of them were wearing face masks. I thought of this as a good sign, that maybe this "corona" garbage would soon be over and we could go back to our real, normal lives. Well, I'm still waiting. Going to the beach was a liberating day. It was the end of my journey from losing myself to finding myself again. I still have so far to go. The process continues 2020 also meant a year of mental healing. I knew that I had a long way to go, to let go of my past and try to do something about creating a future. This process has been very difficult. Letting go isn't an easy process, especially when the things and the people you must let go, used to mean so much to you. The answers to why these things happen, will more than likely remain a mystery forever. When you are given little choice, you choose what is best for you. What was best for me was to get as far away from where I did not want to be, and do it as quickly as possible. This was going to be the only way that I could begin the process of mental healing. I needed to be in my own space, quiet from the rest of the world. I've been very lucky to have a select few people in my life, who have helped me vent my frustrations. Talking with others and sharing my story, and my thoughts and feelings, has been a very good therapy for me. Where do I go from here?

There's really only one direction...forward. Letting go of the past allows me to embrace the future. In one year, I have gotten most of my life back to normal. I have my 40-hour a week job, I have a handful of guitar students on my days off, and I am investing in cryptocurrency. I'm hoping to have a chance this coming summer to drive back up to Wisconsin to retrieve the rest of my belongings from my parents house. I love to drive long road trips. It frees the mind. There is a nice, quiet solitude when you're on the road. Doing 2500+ miles in less than a week will definitely be a challenge. It's something I need to do to put closure to everything. I also want very much to find a woman and do a lot of beach days. Home

I drove 1250 miles from Wisconsin to Florida. The drive took roughly 23 hours (not including rest stops). I drove in a blizzard from Wisconsin to Indiana and torrential rains from Tennessee to the Georgia/Florida border. I made it. I am home. Orlando, Florida is home and always will be. One day, I may move to another part of Florida, perhaps closer to the beach, but Central Florida is where I have lived for most of my life. I am happy to be back where I belong.

[kairoskrp]

                                          — On the wicked wings of time, thy kingdom comes

Meet [ Kim Minseok ]

He is a [ twenty-five ] year old [ manager at chapter one ] currently residing in [ sunhwa apartments, #304 ]. Visit  and greet  him today!

Personality:

Minseok has a bit of a resting bitch face which really hides the way he is. He is a care taker at heart, he will do what he can to make the people closest to him smile even just for a moment. He is stubborn in his ways though, when Minseok has decided you have to be a very special person to get him to change it. He knows what he likes and knows what he doesn’t. He isn’t hard to please. He enjoys the trivial things in life, he likes the way sunlight makes shadows when it peers through trees. He likes that his cat, Mittens will come and paw at him at 3am every morning for food but his therapy dog Puddles won’t ask for food. Minseok is very observant, as someone who enjoys the details in life he takes note of little things people do.

Minseok has a few nervous habits that include his hands. He drinks out of plastic bottles or plastic glasses instead of glass because he will freeze glass much more easily. He hides his hands in big sweaters and sweatshirts to not show his purple/blue knuckles. He doesn’t wear tank tops because the scars on his shoulder make him feel exposed. Minseok will always have white roses in his house, no matter the season. They were his late mothers favorite flower, its his way of thinking of her on the daily.

Spirit: Boreas, God of North Winds and Snow

Powers: Cold manipulation

+ Able to make small snow flurries by cupping his hands and blowing into them.

+ Able to freeze things using his hands, not able to freeze plastic, not able to freeze people the most he can do is cause a stinging sensation

Weaknesses:

-          Hot, as in temperature foods, he can eat them, but it makes his abilities harder to use and it makes him feel sluggish

-          Due to his accident his left shoulder/elbow are quite weak, he still can’t lift over 20 lbs.

-          Direct sunlight for long periods of time makes his abilities harder to use and begins to hurt his eyes

Biography:

{7}

Minseok is only 7. He remembers the dinner, the lack of conversation that night. He remembers the unsettling silence as it washes over him. His Father begins to speak. “We are getting divorced.” Minseok thinks he knows what that means.  Separation. He does not understand why his parents would want to separate. Its all that was said that night. {10-14} Minseok learns how to travel between houses. Mom’s House and Dad’s House. He does not travel between homes. His Father forces him to learn Chinese, play the piano. He won’t have a failure of a son he says. He Wont. And he doesnt, Minseok performs perfectly, but that is only thanks to the fact that he gets some relief from his mother. His mother does not force him to do much of anything. She lends him books, teaches him about flowers and the language they speak. She congratulates him and loves him and is nothing like his father. {15} Its when he is 15 when things begin to change for the first time. It’s when his piano teacher strikes him on the hand for the last time. Causing him to bleed and then pass out. He goes to the hospital and learns two things. One,he is anemic. Two, his mother did not know what was going on at his fathers. His mother is revolted, claims full custody of Minseok and he never has to see his father again.

{15-18}

Minseok begins to take iron supplements. It comes less of a routine and more of a habit each morning. His mother continues to encourage him in school, though he thinks its a waste. He gives up the Chinese lessons but surprisingly continues with the piano. At age 17, Minseok discovers that men as well as women are beautiful. He meets a boy named Jinyoung and he falls so head over heels its sicking. Jinyoung doesn’t mind Minseok’s cold hands or his blank stare. But Jinyoung does seem to mind other people as well as Minseok. “It’s not like I never loved you or anything, its just…I dunno we are young? Dont be so serious.” This is the first time Minseok has had his heartbroken. He continues on with many different types of relationships, he graduates. Top of his class and his father is not present.

{18-20}

College begins and slowly Minseok begins to fall into some sort of routine. Every morning he wakes up, takes his pills, goes to class, goes to work (a small part time job as a cashier) and then goes home. On the days he doesn’t have work he does homework. His mother slowly begins to get ill. Minseok has to make a choice. Continue on with the education, he doesn’t think will go anywhere or work and help his mother. He chooses his mother. Minseok drops out of college at 19, not even completing a degree much to his mothers dismay. He says he has to work hard to pay her hospital bills. On June 25th, Minseok takes his mother for a routine check up. It’s supposed to be a normal check up. “Kim Jae-hye, your mother, Minseok she only has around a month left in her… The cancer, it’s speeding up faster then we thought.” Minseok does everything in his power in 30 days to make his mother happy. He buys her flowers everyday. He plays the piano for her, knowing how much she loved the sound. They would go on short walks on her better days. On the better days when his mother didn’t seem sick. When the month that ticked away didn’t feel like anything.

Death is a funny thing. Minseok almost feels like he felt it coming. He knew it was coming of course, the doctor had said so. July 27th, he goes to his mothers room only to see her to be peacefully asleep. He walks over to her body and grabs her hand. He feels no pulse. The funeral was a short one. Minseok chokes up when he is asked to speak about his mother. About how much she meant to him, she was the ray of sunshine in his life. His Everything. Minseok swears he can see his father in the crowd.

{21}

A year after his mothers death, Minseok falls into a deep depression. He lives off of the money his mother left him, which isn’t much. He doesn’t eat, barely sleeps. Minseok discovers booze, discovers it’s numbing affects. He gets drunk more often then not. Stumbling into his house early one morning he discovers a note of his late mother. “ Dear Minseok, My Dearest Son, I know that I am going to pass soon. We both know I only have such little time left. I’d like to write this letter to thank you for being the best son I could have ever asked for. I know that life with me and your father hasn’t always been easy. I know that. I just hope that I could have been a good figure for you. I hope so. Please continue living life to best of your ability. Don’t let this cold world tear you down. Love, Your mother”

Sobering up is different for everyone.

{22-23}

Minseok cuts back on the booze, on the clubs. On the loud bars, the numb feeling of stumbling home to no one. He works, oh god does he work. He saves up all his money, well, expect for the GSX-R 600 on his birthday. He decides he is going to move. Moving to Seoul may not be the best idea that Minseok has ever had but he holds his head held high with the words of his mother in his heart. Along the way he tries again at love. The first couple times it doesn’t work. They say he is too focused on everything but them. He doesn’t disagree. On his 24th birthday he has enough money to finally move to Seoul.

{24, The Accident} After finally moving into the apartment complex he has looked at forever Minseok feels as if a whole new world as opened up for him. He is in a new area! A new life! March this year is a cold one, the snow has yet to melt and it feels as if spring will never appear. On a one last trip to Guri, his home town, his rental car is packed with the very last few things he owns. Its nothing really impressive. Minseok never really had the chance to really collect anything that he thought was important. He is still nervous about foreclosing the house though. It’s a long process the people who know alot more about this then he does. Thats what they said. He just wished it would hurry up already, that and he hoped his father wouldn’t try to take the house. In his daze, he gets t-boned on the highway, throwing his car off of the road and rolling into the snow banks on the side. Minseok is trapped under the car and has no way of escape. He tries to crawl his way out, only sliding open the right side of chin and his lip. Bleeding and freezing, he thinks hes going to die. Going to die just before he could start over. Before his very eyes, a figure appeared. It was a tall man, with a long beard laced with frost. “I will save you,” It began and Minseok thought he saw God this was his enterance into heaven. It turns out God, or A God, was Boreas. The God of North Winds and Winter. Passing itself into Minseok as the next vessel. Minseok passes out in the snow. When he awakes much later, he is no longer trapped under a car. He is in a hospital hooked up to IV’s with at least a half a dozen people around him. They say It’s a miracle he survived. He decides to not tell them of the God or the fact when he holds his water the swirls of frost that pass over it.

No miracle is without sacrifice it seems.

He has to get stitches on his right lip and chin. Frostbite had already taken ahold of his left shoulder and was moving down his arm by the time he was rescued. Long scars that look like fingers or ice cracks ghost his collarbone down his left shoulder, stopping right before his elbow.

{25-present Minseok}

Recovery takes awhile. Minseok has to go to physical therapy twice a week for 3 hours. His left shoulder is still quite sore and he cannot lift anything over 20 lbs. Minseok adopts the stray kitten who he sees near his apartment complex. She is white with black feet, he names her Mittens. He also gets a small therapy dog. A black and tan Shiba Inu, who, despite all his trying, only comes to the name Puddles. Puddles is there on his bad days, his stay in bed all days. Minseok finds he really likes working at Chapter One. His mind feels at ease and its not too much physical labor. He discovers rapidly what he can and cannot do. Wood will not freeze unless its wet, dont touch people, he will sting them. Even if he doesn’t mean too.

These days Minseok is just looking for someone to break down his ice walls, someone to look past his blank stare and cold hands to see the warm heart within.