#best friend harry fic
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Use Me Up | boyfriend's best friend!h
Originally posted on Patreon!
Summary: Harry's your boyfriend's best friend and he's very hard to resist.
Word Count: 7,072
Warning: smut, cheating, lying, alcohol consumption
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Look at him. Dark curls, soft green eyes, broad shoulders. All fit and tattooed with that dirty smirk aimed in your direction. It’d been like that all night. When no one was looking his eyes were on you.
Harry Styles. The object of desire for so many women. But the problem for you was that he was your boyfriend’s best friend. You should have been off-limits. He shouldn’t have even been taking part in your daydreams.
You rolled your eyes at him as Colin knocked his beer over.
Everyone had a couple too many drinks at that point. Your boyfriend, the worst off.
“Here,” you leaned down and righted the spilled can to halt the beer from pouring out.
Colin fell back into the couch and laughed as you got up to take the nearly empty can to the trash.
“Hey! I wasn’t done with that!”
“I actually think it’s time for a little water,” you countered.
Walking into the kitchen you took a breath and grabbed two cups for water. You needed some as well. You’d been hitting the strawberry lime seltzers kind of hard since you arrived at Ivy’s and you were feeling the alcohol.
“Need help?”
You turned to look over your shoulder as you shut off the faucet.
“I’m pretty sure I can handle this,” you laughed as you raised your hands, a cup of water in each.
Harry reached into the fridge to grab himself another beer, “All right. Was just being nice. You done drinking for the night?”
“Probably. Colin is for sure done. Gonna have to carry him home I think.”
“I’ll help you. I can tell he’s well past his limit. There’s no way you’re going to have an easy go of it with him. He’s like Gumby when he gets drunk.”
You laughed and Harry licked his lips as he watched you. You hated (but you loved it) when he licked his lips while he was looking at you. It elicited memories of the not-so-long-ago past.
. .
You arrived at Colin’s a little early but you knew Harry’d be there and he’d let you in until Colin showed up.
He got you a soda from the fridge and you both went into the living room where he showed you their new record player.
“It’s got great sound and check this out,” he pulled out an album and placed it over the turntable showing you how the tone arm lowered automatically and cycled the vinyl around to the perfect spot to begin at the first song.
“Oh, that’s cool!” You watched as he clicked a button and sound started playing through the speakers. It was an old popular 70s rock song, “The sound quality really is good.”
He snapped his fingers and began to move his hips as he grinned at you so you placed your soda down and mimicked him, swaying and laughing as you snapped your fingers.
Behind Harry’s grin, you saw something else. The way he licked his lips, his eyes traveled over your curves, and he slunk in closer as he moved to the music- it held some kind of intensity that you weren’t sure how to work out. One thing was for sure; Harry was a flirt and your boyfriend was not home.
“You’re cute,” Harry said it so flippantly as he jutted his chin up and kept his eyes on yours.
You scoffed and rolled your eyes, “Yeah right…”
But he did this thing that had you feeling a slurry of scorching lava under your fingertips as he bit into his bottom lip with his eyelids drooped gently, pupils winding over your hips while you continued to move and he pulled your hand into his, redirecting your flow until you were practically dancing in his arms.
“You know you’re cute. What are you doing dating Colin anyway?”
His hand wound over your hip as he kept his eyes on yours.
“I…” you laughed and shook your head. You weren’t sure what he was doing but it had you reeling. His heavy presence and deep voice, the music lulling you into surrender, his pretty bright eyes, that evil grin… It definitely wasn’t the first time he’d flirted with you in private.
“You’re too good for him, Y/n,” he spoke smoothly, his face nearing yours and his voice dripping with lusty deception.
“I doubt that, Harry,” you spoke just above a whisper as he slithered around you until his hands were holding your hips and your back was against his chest. You knew it was wrong. You knew you should have stopped but you didn’t want to.
And when you felt his breath on the back of your ear and he pressed his hips against your bum you softly gasped but made no move to stop him. He was too close and his lips were practically brushing against the shell of your ear as he kept swaying you in step with his movements, hips glued to your backside, and then he moaned. The sound vibrating off your neck and making goosebumps rise up on your skin.
You closed your eyes and settled your hands over his when he let out another graveled moan into your ear, “You like this don’t you? Need more attention from Colin than he can give you…”
It was true. You were a bit needy while Colin was a bit cold, aloof. But it’d always been that way with you two and you’d settled and gotten used to the way he was. However, that didn’t mean you didn’t miss attention. And Harry was suddenly filling in the small gaps left behind from Colin’s apathy.
But the moment you heard the keys in the door, Harry moved away from you just as deftly as he’d pulled you against his chest and acted like nothing had happened.
. .
You forced Colin to drink his whole cup of water and by the time he’d finished he was already half asleep. It was time to go and Harry accompanied you.
“You don’t have to help,” you said as the three of you climbed into the back of a taxi together.
“Look at him, Y/n. What makes you think he’s gonna be able to walk to the door on his own? You certainly can’t carry him. Besides, I live at the same house and it was time for me to go as well. Saves us money anyway, yeah?”
You nodded. He had a point you supposed.
You were smushed between Harry and Colin in the backseat. Colin was like a limp noodle against you while Harry was warm and solid and somehow he took up so much more space than you imagined he would.
“You’re gonna stay over, right?” Harry looked down at you.
“I figured I would, yeah. It’s not a problem?”
Harry chuckled and looked out his window before putting his big palm over his thigh, knocking against your knee, “Of course it’s not a problem. I love it when you’re over.”
You couldn’t take your eyes off his pinky finger which was nudged against your jeans. You weren’t sure if he was doing it on purpose or if it was just because the space was so tight but you certainly didn’t mind it. Looking over at your boyfriend his mouth was dropped open and his eyes were closed. Out cold.
“He’s not waking up for the rest of the night,” Harry spoke quietly, his lips aimed toward your ear.
You gulped when Harry shifted the slightest, pressing his side into yours, and began moving his hand over his jeans-clad thigh, his pinky brushing over your own jeans-clad thigh.
When you arrived at the house, Harry pulled Colin out of the backseat and lifted him into his arms bridal style. You laughed at the sight and followed the men toward the door.
“Keys are in my front left pocket,” Harry said as he jutted his hips out and looked at you with a smirk.
You sighed and slid your fingers into his pocket, which was a bit tight, but you pushed in until you felt the metal and looped your finger into one of the key rings to pull at it.
Harry sucked in a breath through his teeth, “There you go, Y/n. Just like that.” Harry said it as if you were doing something naughty to him.
Unlocking the door you stepped in and held it open for Harry, who walked past you and took his best friend to his bed, laying his head on the pillow and then removed his boots. You watched from the doorway of Colin’s room as Harry took care of him, light shining into his room from the hallway.
Harry grunted when he pulled the last boot off and then got up to leave the room, closing the door behind himself.
You pointed toward the doorknob, “I’m probably just gonna call it a night actually.”
Harry pressed his lips together, hiding the grin that was trying to take over his features, “Nahh… stay up a little longer with me. Don’t go to bed yet.”
It was a terrible idea. You weren’t being forced to follow him away from Colin’s room. You weren’t being manipulated or deceived. You were curious, though. Wondered what might happen if given the chance.
You both had a bottle of water as you sat on the stool near the record player and Harry sat on the couch across from you, his legs spread apart.
“Why you all the way over there?” He licked his goddamn lips again as he looked at you with what could only be described as bedroom eyes; that half-lidded, sultry gaze.
“I don’t know. I just sat here is all,” you shrugged and capped your water bottle before placing it on the floor by your feet.
“You got work tomorrow?” He asked as he crossed an ankle over his knee before his ring-clad fingers ran up and down his thick thighs.
“No. I don’t work Sundays. What about you?” You already knew the answer.
“Nope. Means we can stay up as late as we want. Colin won’t wake up til afternoon anyway. When he gets like this he’s a log.”
You laughed and nodded, “Yeah. I’ve seen him like this a few times. You’re right.”
“Why don’t you put a record on,” he gestured toward the turn table next to you.
You squatted down to go through the records, tracing your fingers over the dust jackets until you found one that had a mix of popular 70s songs, “You guys have a lot of 70s music.”
Harry crouched down next to you to see which album you were looking at, “S’cause these are all used and plus 70s music is pretty good, yeah?” He grinned at you, taking the record from your hands and stood up, “Want this one?”
You nodded and watched him put the vinyl on the record player and then hit the button for the music to begin. The song that started to play sounded like something instrumental at first but then you heard the first line Got a black magic woman…
Harry turned to look down at you and began bobbing his head and rolling his shoulders, moving to the music. You laughed at him. He was being a little goofy with his movements but the dimpled grin on his face was evidence that he was trying to make you laugh. You swung your arms then raised them over your head and spun around with your hips swaying.
You and Harry kept moving to the song and then he was behind you, singing the words to the song when you felt him moving in step with you, “She’s tryin’ to make a devil out of me… Don’t turn your back on me baby…”
You laughed as he sang just loud enough for you to hear his raspy voice in your ear.
“Is my singing funny to you,” you felt his hand on your arm, nudging you back toward him.
You turned to look back at him over your shoulder, “You’re just funny, Harry. You’re being goofy.”
“Oh yeah? You think I’m goofy?” He held your arm as he pressed his chest into your back and continued singing, “Stop messin’ ‘round with your tricks…Don’t turn your back on me, baby… You just might pick up my magic sticks…”
You moved with the music and couldn’t help the cheesy grin on your face as he brought a hand down to your hip while his other stayed wrapped around your upper arm.
He sang his breathy words into your ear and it made your skin to heat but the way he was holding you against his body had your resolve crumbling. Not that you had much resolve to begin with.
“Yes, you got your spell on me, baby… Turnin’ my heart into stone… I need you so bad magic woman, I can’t leave you alone…”
You moaned, the top row of your teeth jammed into your bottom lips and he squeezed at your hip as his lips grazed against your ear.
You knew this would happen. When you were looking through the albums you wondered if he’d get up and dance with you. If he’d pull you into his arms and seduce you like he nearly did that time before. Or any of the other times he flirted with you or touched your skin, or whispered compliments into your ear when Colin wasn’t paying attention. There was only so much a girl could take when a man like Harry was coming on to her.
And who would ever know?
You raised your arms and drew your hands to the back of his neck as he continued swaying you in his arms, his crotch glued to your bum and you felt every bit of him pressed into you. His hot exhale on your neck was damp on your skin just before his pink lips found your flesh.
It sent a crackle of electricity through your spine as he began to kiss your soft skin slowly and when the song changed you found yourself being turned in his arms, all blurry and hot and thirsting when you felt his mouth smeared against yours.
He cradled the back of your head as his lips pressed plush kisses to your mouth and then his tongue slid over yours.
You’d stopped moving altogether and instead just stood next to the record player as the music played and you made out with Harry. If Colin walked in you didn’t know if you’d be able to even stop then. Harry’s lips and his tongue and his hands were rewiring your brain chemistry and all you wanted was him.
A cracked moan fell from your chest as Harry pulled away, his eyes locked on yours as he tugged at you, moving you toward his bedroom.
The Bill Withers song was still playing in the background as you were led to his room.
I want to spread the news… That if it feels this good getting used… Oh, you just keep on using me… Until you use me up…
He shut his door and the sound of the song was muffled but when he put his hands on your hips and his soft lips found yours you grabbed his t-shirt and pulled at him until you were both on his bed, limbs tangled and mouths wound together.
He rolled to his back and pulled you over his legs so you were straddling his thighs on top of him as you kept kissing and groaning into his mouth.
You could feel how hard he was in his jeans as you rolled your pelvis gently down and he hissed, “Keep doing that and I’m not gonna be able to stop, Y/n.”
You laughed into his mouth and pulled away to look down at him, “What are we doing, Harry?”
He let out a breathy chuckle as he kept a hold of your hips, “We’re doing something very bad is what we’re doing.”
Biting your lip you looked at his kiss-swollen mouth and back into his eyes, “We shouldn’t though, right? This is bad.”
He licked his lips, “We shouldn’t. But who’s gonna stop us?” His big hands moved down to your thighs. “What if it’s just our little secret? No one has to know.”
You dropped your lips back down over his in an unspoken agreement. No one ever had to know. It’d be your dirty little secret. A naughty indulgence to never be spoken of again.
When you felt his fingers smooth up to the bottom hem of your shirt you felt him tugging it upward. Halting the movement of your mouth against his you sat up and shucked it from your torso. His hands immediately found your tits as you unhooked the back of your bra and the moment your nipples were bare to him he sat up, one arm winding around your low back as his hand cupped your fleshy breast and he ducked to pull it into his mouth.
Wet saliva coated each of your tits as Harry wove his mouth back and forth on your skin and your nipples. You slid your fingers into his hair and moaned as he leaned you back further until your back was on his mattress and he was hovering over you, undoing your jeans button.
You looked up at him and pulled at his t-shirt. You wanted to see more of him. You’d seen his bare chest before. You’d seen him in just running shorts a few times. The man was ungodly. Tattoos, chiseled pecs, and soft abs with masculine hair scattered over his chest. Strong arms that could crush and thighs that allowed him the sort of endurance you were sure would come in handy that very night. He was broad and dense, heavy and sexy as fuck.
When his skin was on view you ran your hands over his shoulders and down to his pecs as he began to undo his own jeans. You quickly pushed your fingers into your waistband and yanked your jeans down your legs until you were just left in stretchy red boyshorts.
Harry groaned and kicked his jeans off and then crawled back over you, carefully fitting himself between your thighs and laying his hips against yours, his hard cock, hidden by the thin layer of his boxers, rested over your pussy as he slowly rocked himself down. You lifted your hips upward to feel his girth and the heat of him between your legs.
Dry humping. You hadn’t done it since your first year of college. Guys tended to go right for getting naked and getting something wet as soon as possible.
Though, technically Harry was getting something wet. Between his tongue on your lips and your pussy secreting arousal with every nudge of his dick against your clit there was nothing dry about dry humping in that moment. Even his boxers were getting wet the longer you two went at it.
He began to move himself down your body, taking more time to lavish your breasts with his tongue and his lips before he licked into your belly button triggering a giggle to bubble out of your mouth. He placed his hands on your hips and dug his fingers under the elastic band at the top of your underwear and began to pull at them, to which you lifted your hips so he could tug them off.
Smoothing his big palms up the outside of your thighs to your hips he kept his eyes on the glistening space between your legs and puffed out a breath, “This is all mine tonight?” He looked up at you and it was dripping hedonistic lust as his thumbs slid down over the soft flesh of your pelvis.
You nodded and breathed out a yes before he slowly poked his tongue out to lick his lips and lowered his mouth to the space next to his thumb, a warm kiss smushed into your skin before it sliced a damp path inward to your mons. You were spinning and blubbering under him as he gripped onto the underside of your thigh and held you apart.
Your body was trembling before he even laid his tongue over your pussy but when he finally pressed a soft, barely-there kiss to your clit you could have just perished right then. You balled up the blanket under you in your fists as he began to run his tongue up and down your wet pussy.
You sputtered out a string of curses and rolled your hips up when he slid his fingers over your entrance and prodded in.
“Mmm…” he lifted his face to look up at you, “Y/n… you’re so wet for me. Gonna need to sneak tastes of your pussy anytime Colin isn’t around.”
You couldn’t respond other than to moan his name and thread your fingers into his hair when he reattached his lips.
There was something about the way Harry did it, the way he licked at your pussy and kissed your clit, the way he drove his fingers into your cunt and moaned over you that was so sultry and hungry… it was like he needed it, like he was desperate for it. For you.
The house was quiet. It was lucky Colin slept like the dead when he got drunk like that or you’d have to worry about him hearing. But as it was, Harry’s bedroom was filled with the sound of something lewd and wet and achy. Moans coming from you and from him, your pussy getting worked by his fingers and his mouth, the shift of bodies over blankets and the subtle creaking of his bed as he dug into your pussy with more fervor.
And you really tried not thinking about the way Colin did it versus how Harry was doing it but you were amazed at what a little enthusiasm could feel like. Colin ate you out, sure, but it wasn’t like this. It wasn’t a man with a primal need to make you feel good and stake some kind of claim on you. Colin’s method was more like a means to an end. A way to get you nice and wet so he could stick his dick inside of you.
Harry’s method was an animalistic craving. He wasn’t eating you out nicely with a soft tongue and a few slurps. No. This was something else. He was devouring you. Sloppy and sopping. He dragged his tongue over you like it was his fucking job. The one arm he had wrapped around you, was anchoring you to his mouth. You couldn’t escape him if you wanted. This man wasn’t taking it easy. When he lifted you slightly, he scooted in closer and removed his fingers from your pussy and licked up the wet spots on your inner thighs and down your bum before he spread you back open with two of his fingers again and got back to ravaging your clit.
You had to release his hair and go back to gripping the blankets as you felt your body wash away into the atmosphere, floating and buzzing and melting as you lay helpless under his weight and his tongue.
You were certain it was going to be a mess when he was done with you. There wasn’t anything dry between your legs nor on his face. The heat and the moisture rose until there was nothing left for you to do but come. And come and come…
He had his fingers pressed into your front wall massaging your g-spot as he sucked and drew your clit into his mouth. You couldn’t stop shaking or crying for what felt like minutes upon minutes.
But then it was too much and you squeaked a laugh as you tried lifting and pulling away but when you pushed at his forehead he swatted you away and grunted, not letting up on the doggish way he was eating you.
“Oh my god! Fuck, Harry!” You bellowed into his room and tried closing your legs and moving to roll to your side but he had you pinned down and it seemed only to egg him on. His eyes flitted up to yours and in warning to keep still, not that you had much choice. He wasn’t budging nor letting you pull away from his mouth as he continued fucking you with those long fingers and lapping all around your hot, pulsing clit.
But then you saw the slight smirk as he lifted for air before he dove down again and slid his tongue quickly over your clit and the sensitive, too-much feeling turned into a liquid ache and then desire as you felt you second orgasm begin to prick and burst until it was forced out of you like a torture method. Come or else…
So you came again. Not against your will but not by your own accord. It was automatic. You couldn’t stop it from happening.
You were drifting into the ether when he finally, fucking finally, pulled his mouth and his fingers away. When you opened your eyes he was smirking down at you, like he was proud of the state he’d left you in.
“What?” You croaked out as your chest heaved violently.
“I’m serious. Gonna need to do that to you as often as possible. Whenever Colin’s not looking. Damn you’re hot, Y/n. Fuck…” he ran his hands over your sides and up your torso to your nipples where he circled over them with his thumbs, “Wish I’d gotten to you first.”
You pushed yourself to sit up, “You… he’s your best friend, though. I mean… I just think…” you huffed, not fully having your wits about you after what he’d just done to you, “God… I wouldn’t be able to say no, but this is bad, Harry. Don’t you think this should be a one-time thing? Like, we should never do this again, right?”
You watched him lick his lips and swallow and that’s when you noticed he had your arousal down his neck. The guy had gone in so intensely on your pussy that you dripped down his neck. You supposed he had reason to be proud.
“We’ll see, won’t we? I’m not a great friend, I’ll admit. But you’re not a great girlfriend either are you? Doing this behind his back the way we are… it’s bad, but fuck if I don’t want to steal you away from him.”
You puffed a laugh through your nose and ran a hand over your face. You couldn’t believe you were cheating in the first place. It was insane. You weren’t a cheater.
But actually… you were a cheater. You were lying in your boyfriend’s best friend’s bed completely naked and freshly zonked from two orgasms. You were absolutely a cheater.
Harry pulled at your thigh, dragging you closer to him and he cradled the back of your head with his hand and kissed you so deeply you nearly forgot Colin’s name for a moment. You could feel his erection, stiff and hot against your inner thigh and you were compelled to run your hand over his boxers to grip him and feel it in your hand.
You gasped into his mouth and parted from the kiss to look down at the monster you were holding in your palm. Looking back up at Harry with your lips parted in lust you were suddenly hyper-aware that the man you were in bed with was going to fuck you with that thing and if he was as good with his cock as he was with his mouth… you were surely doomed.
“What is it?” He asked you with hooded eyes and a syrupy, deep, lusty voice. He knew what it was. The man was more than aware of the kind of advantage he had in that area.
You squeezed around him let your palm travel up the length of it over his boxers and pressed over his tip, “Let me see it.”
He grinned at you silently as he pulled at his boxers and brought them down, his thick shaft lobbing out, heavy and stiff. You let out a moan and moved back, getting to your knees and holding him at the root against his pubic hair before tonguing over him and drawing your saliva down the length of him.
Harry hissed as he leaned back, palms flat against his mattress as he watched you suck on him for a moment, lips working over his tip and wetting him with your spit. You moaned again and pulled off of him, “God, Harry. Fuck…”
He held the back of your head as you dipped down again and took him in your mouth, wrapping your lips around him and gorging on the taste and feel of him. It was smooth and hot against your tongue. He was wide, bulbous. But you couldn’t help the way just the look and feel of his cock had your already weeping pussy flutter and clench at the thought of him driving into you with it.
“You like that, don’t you? God, you’re supposed to mine, Y/n. Oh fuck that feels good…”
Your insides were feeling too hollow, your walls straining together to feel something that would take up the empty space. You popped off of his tip, saliva dripping down your chin, “Fuck me. Please.”
Harry tilted his head to the side, “Already? You don’t need a minute to recover? You that greedy, baby?”
“I am right now,” you pulled at his boxers to get rid of them. Harry put his hands into the band of his underwear and took them off completely.
“Just right now? So tomorrow we’ll go back to normal then,” he crawled over you, making your back hit the mattress as his hand found your tit, “Pretend this never happened and never do it again, yeah?”
You panted and reached around his back to pull him down, “I don’t know…” you whined and bucked your hips up, “Just… right now is all I can think about. Please…”
“A bit cockdumb huh? You’re not thinking straight, are you?”
You scrunched your face and pouted, “What? Just fuck me, Harry!”
He grinned at you and shook his head in disbelief, “No condom then?”
You’d forgotten. You were always so good about using condoms and being the one on top of that decision with Colin. Only a few times did you ever let him fuck you without one and it was only when you were 100% sure it was not during your fertile window and he wasn’t allowed to come inside you anyway.
“Fuck…” you breathed out and whined as you raised your hips upward, pressing your wet pussy against his cock, “Just fuck me. I don’t even care right now. I’m gonna lose my mind…”
Harry grabbed your chin and his eyes pierced into you as he spoke, “Are you on birth control?”
You shook your head, “No. But… god…” you writhed under him.
Harry let out a burst of a laugh, still shaking his head, “Damn. Did I do this to you? Baby you’re gonna regret it if you let me fuck you raw. That’s asking for trouble.”
“Just… goddamnit…” you closed your eyes and groaned. You wanted him right then. You were sure you’d never acted like such a slut before but Harry’s body and his deep voice, his eyes, the way the front of his thighs were pressed into the back of yours… He could just slip right in and pound away and you’d feel all of him. Every ridge and wrinkle, hot velvet gliding through your gummy channel, drinking him in…
When you raised your hips again, your eyes on his he nudged himself down toward you, his cock sliding through your pussylips, slicking up and down and jabbing at your clit you clung to his back tight.
“You want it? Like this?” He placed his forearm down on the bed alongside your shoulder as he rocked down over you, his tip traveling over your pussy and getting drenched in your juice.
“Mmm… Harry… yes…”
He softly kissed your lips as he rutted up and slid back, “You’re gonna let me fuck you bare? In this bedroom right here, next to your boyfriend’s? You sure?”
You nodded, your nose bumping against his as you breathed out the word please.
He parted from the kiss and set his eyes on yours as he flexed his thighs and poked at your hole gently with his tip. He teased you for a bit, only gently pressing just the very tip of himself into you until suddenly and all once he forced his crown through your tight, pulsing muscle, opening you up and burying himself in until his balls were tucked against your ass.
You both let out a loud and pathetic mewl at the sensation and you could feel him shaking already. It was decadent and rude and sumptuous and unbearable. It was so wrong. So bad but so fucking delightful.
He began to slowly thrust as he kept his gaze pinned to yours, “Okay? Feel good?”
You moaned as you nodded and kept a tight grasp on his back, wrapping your legs around him so you could keep yourself grounded. So that you knew it was real. That Harry was actually fucking you with his big cock and you weren’t just dreaming it.
“Yeah? Feel all of me like this, don’t you? Needed me so bad and now you’ve got me, baby. Gonna give you my cock whenever you want it. Sneak around behind Colin’s back and keep it secret. He’ll never know. Could fuck you all night and all morning and he’ll wake up tomorrow with no idea of the filthy kind of girl you are.”
“Mmmm… fuck!” You whined as he plunged deep inside your guts. You’d never had anyone so thick and long before. And it was just a bonus that it was attached to a man like Harry. It shouldn’t have surprised you that someone with the kind of confidence he had would be so hung.
“Mmmm… fuck is right… that feels so fucking good. I had a feeling your pussy would be made for me,” he panted his words as he worked into you, thighs flexing against yours.
Your noises were uncontrollable. You had no ability to restrain yourself. You truly were intoxicated, incapacitated, obtunded. Delirious. Which Harry seemed to get a kick out of.
“You’ve never had it like this before, have you? I know what you had to deal with,” he gasped when you gripped tight around and dug your nails into his back, “Colin’s a lazy boyfriend. You need more attention and I can see that. Gonna give you all the attention you can handle if you want it, Y/n…”
Harry pulled back, making your legs fall from his back as he lowered his lips to your tits, curling himself over you as he continued fucking into you, sucking your nipples into his mouth and running his tongue over your sensitive nubs one at a time.
It was debauched gluttony. Harry was so much better in bed than Colin and it almost wasn’t fair. But you couldn’t even feel an ounce of guilt because it was the best thing you’d ever felt. Harry sucked your nipples hard as his cock wrecked your insides, running his hand along the outside of your soft breast and then to the other side, continuing the pace at which he rocked into you. His bed only creaked in time with his thrusts, slow and steady, but the sound of your sodden pussy taking his big cock was salacious and lewd.
Every stroke of his long dick through your pussy walls felt like damnation and salvation all at once. You weren’t sure you’d be the same after. Weren’t sure you wouldn’t be begging him for more every time Colin wasn’t watching. Harry had ruined you.
Harry’s gasps and pants against your tits grew more desperate and you could feel him throbbing inside of you, nudging deep into your tummy and slowly rearing back, his cock coated and sticky with you before plunging it all back inside of you again.
He steadied himself, lifting up to look down at you as he began to fuck into you a little harder, his bed bouncing a little more with the sound of skin slapping together and your punched moans filled the room.
Every time he buried himself in he ground his pelvis against your clit and it sent fireworks through your nervous system. You grabbed onto his thighs as he rutted into you, deep and desperate strokes that split you wide open and made you drool it felt so good. Harry’s chest was sweating as he held your hips down and circled his groin against you, his moans growing louder and whinier as he watched you slowly come undone.
“Give me another one, baby. Show me how good it feels when I fuck you. Better than it’s ever felt with anyone else…”
Harry had something to prove.
You could hardly think straight. The man was fucking out any logic or sense in your brain but you didn’t want to have rational thoughts that interrupted what was happening. You wanted Harry and his cock. You wanted to be fucked by him just like he was for all time. To hell with Colin and his sorry excuse for lovemaking. Harry was a real man with pleasure to give.
The breath was kicked from your lungs when the tight coil in your tummy began to unravel and the yummiest, most transcendent orgasm you’d ever experienced began to take over. The only thing you registered was Harry’s cock pounding into you and words of encouragement egging you on as the mattress squeaked violently under you. His words were unclear but you could hear the starved and whimpery moans falling from his mouth between words.
You trembled and quaked as you spasmed over him, the glide of his heavy cock through your guts squelched and ached as you gasped for air and finally began to discern what was happening when Harry frantically pulled his cock from your pussy and climbed over you, taking your face in his hand and dipped his pussy flavored dick into your lips where you felt him pumping warm, creamy come down your throat and onto your tongue. You grabbed onto his ass with both hands and pulled at him, beckoning him to stuff his whole fat cock into your esophagus.
The grunts and moans he let fall from his chest were the sexiest thing you’d ever heard from any man. Colin wasn’t vocal at all. When Colin came he’d pinch his face up like he was in pain or disgusted by the flavor of something and silently sigh with his mouth open.
But Harry… Harry wasn’t holding back. He was moaning as he thrust his cock into your mouth and slapped his hand on the headboard to steady himself, “Fuck…”
When you’d siphoned every drop from him, he gently pulled his meaty cock from your mouth and you coughed, gasping for air. Harry laid himself on the bed next to you and cupped your cheek, “You all right,” he panted.
You moaned and wiped the back of your hand over your mouth and rolled to face him, “Yeah I’m all right. Better than all right I’d say.”
Harry laughed, moving his hand from your face and fondled your breast in his palm, smushing at it and thumbing over your nipple, “You down to keep doing this with me?”
You sighed and ran your tongue along the inside of your cheek as you placed your palm on his chest, “I’m pretty sure I’ll be craving that from now on.”
He grinned, “Be craving what?”
“You. The way you do it. I…” you laughed, “I’ve never come three times in a row like that for any man.”
“So you want me to give you lots of cummies?” He snorted a laugh, “Need me to take care of you when Colin can’t.”
“When you say it like that… god it sounds so bad doesn’t it?”
“It is bad, Y/n. We are two very bad people who just did something very awful to someone. But I certainly don’t want to stop.”
“I mean… I don’t know if I can stop now. That was…”
“The best.”
You nodded. It was the best. And you knew you’d have regrets and the guilt would come at some point. But in that moment after being expertly fucked and properly taken care of you could think of nothing better than to do it again and again and again. As often as you could get away with it.
“How long do you think we can keep doing this? Like we’ll have to be lying all the time and sneaking around.”
“If we’re quiet and sneaky enough, as long as we want.”
You bit into your bottom lip and giggled, “That was a smart move. Not coming inside of me. Was gonna let you, ya know.”
Harry sat up with a smirk, “I know you were gonna. But I think fucking my best friend’s girl raw is quite enough mistakes for one night. As much as I wanted to fill you up we’ll have to save that one for a rainy day.”
You sat up with him, clothes all strewn about on the floor and at the foot of his bed, “A rainy day, huh? I’ll keep that in mind.”
Harry pinched your thigh before hopping off the bed out of your reach with a laugh, “And I think it’s only fair that you sleep in here with me tonight,” he slid his boxers up his legs, “Colin’s not gonna wake up until late so we’ll have plenty of time before he’s conscious.”
Harry tossed you his t-shirt and you pulled it over your head, “Why’s that only fair?”
Harry shrugged, “Cause I like to cuddle and Colin’s passed out so might as well let me have some since I probably won’t get to do it very often.”
You slid off his bed and pulled your arms over his shoulders, “That’s kind of sweet, Harry.”
“So you’ll stay in here with me tonight?”
“Without a doubt.”
You were both so fucked.
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Dress
Hellooo. Here is a best friends sister sorta request- h is best friends with your brother 👀 and he’s tired of hiding 👀 I think this is a one off, maybe a two off if I’m feeling spicy.
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Words- 3k
Warnings- exhibitionism(don’t do stuff in public pls), dirty talk, soft dom!h, slight angst, slight mention of violence, people pleasing tendencies, etc etc etc
———
"I just wish things were different. I wish we didn't have to hide. I wish your brother knew about us. This sneaking around shit… it’s getting old. I don’t like having to pretend you aren’t the only fuckin’ thing I’m thinking about."
“I know…” The dark corner of the club was their solace. The humid air from the sea breeze leaked into the club around them and overly loud and slightly dated music being the unlikely reprove to having to keep up appearances through the last few days. Harry’s family always came with them on this vacation out to the islands and it used to be hell on earth. Each year she had tried her hardest to tamper down her crush, but now she didn’t have to.
Well, not unless their families were around.
With her brother in his own room, Harry had volunteered to take Y/N out as a ’chaperone’ of sorts and in turn, gave her a real taste of what it would be like if they didn’t have to hide their relationship- but she wasn’t exactly ready for the explosive way she knew her brother would react. He took things incredibly personally sometimes, but she was doing her best to try and not let it scare her too much. Harry was right- it was getting old. incredibly so, but it was hard to let go of her peacemaker mentality. She’d adopted it her whole life to keep the peace, diffuse situations, and now that she had finally found happiness with someone- it happened to be the one person that she knew he was going to freak out over.
“We need to tell him eventually, I know that. But I just…” Her fingers tangled in his necklaces, the alcohol making it easier to be emotionally vulnerable for once. “I don’t want to ruin it. Don’t want him to scare you away.”
Harry's heart ached as he looked at Y/N. He knew she was right, but the thought of hiding their relationship made him feel sick. Tired, even. He didn’t like having to watch his hands, where he was looking. He should be able to room with his girlfriend. It wasn’t like their parents hadn’t been rooting for it for ages, but he tried to understand where she was coming from.
Maybe it was a bit of the rose colored glasses keeping him from seeing what she did, but he didn’t feel the need to valiantly protect her brother from the knowledge that he was dating her. "I don't want to hide either, darling." He said softly. “M’not going to let anything come between us, especially not him." His hand slid up her thigh, wrapping around to the back of it and flexing his fingers.
"Your brother might piss me off when finds out, but only because he's probably, definitely going hit me. I'm not going anywhere, Y/N. I promise you that." His face grew more serious. "I don’t know how to make you understand that I am not afraid of him. I’ve been his mate for years. I know what he’s like but respectfully, he’s going to need to get over it and realize that I only have the best intentions..."
“I know.” She repeated, the humid air hitting her neck as she pushed bed hair off her shoulder, craning it to look up at him. It was unfair how handsome he was, with his curls sticking to his forehead and the back of his neck and the light shadow of facial hair since he had missed shaving yesterday. “I just… I know it’s selfish, but I want to spend tonight imagining he already knows and we don’t have to worry about anything. That no one would be all… shocked or even say anything if I do this.” Leaning up, she lightly pressed her lips against his in a chaste kiss before settling back on her feet, lips slowly separating. Harry made no move to pull away from her. If anything, he followed.
Harry's eyes shifted as he watched her, his heart picking in his chest. He loved the way she thought, the way she imagined a world where they didn't have to hide. Never once did he imagine himself to be one of those lovesick fuckers, but here he was again. Swooning over a goddamn kiss.
But really, who could blame him? He loved the way she kissed him, all soft and sweet and so damn gentle, like she was still a little hesitant he would say no even though they’d kissed dozens and dozens of times- stolen them right under everyone’s noses. As if he could ever say no- his body wouldn’t ever allow that. It was all greedy for her, had no capacity, no ability to deny her if anything when it came to telling his girl no. "Then let's imagine.”
Sinewy arms wrapped around her waist as he pulled her back into their hidden corner, the music pumping around them and his body hiding her from the crowd.. "Let's imagine that your brother knows and he's okay with it. That he's even happy for us." He pressed his lips to her neck, kissing and nipping at her skin. “A little grossed out, because I think that you are… the most beautiful, incredible, sweet woman I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing… but that would only be the truth.”
“You really think that about me?” Her voice spoke solely to him. In their seclusion, people were still passing by, but no one paid attention. No one cared. To the rest of them, it looked like a young couple too loved up to keep hands off of each other. In most ways, that was the truth. Who knew invisibility could be such a gift at times?
Harry chuckled against her throat, his breath hot on her sticky skin. She smelled like sunscreen and that tequila sunrise she had accidentally splashed on herself, so a bit of orange juice and grenadine. Edible, summer, he wanted to sink into her and melt. "Of course I do." The man scoffed, his hands slowly roaming over her body as if he couldn't help himself. "And if your brother knew about us, I'd tell him exactly that. That I want you… and I want t’make you my girl properly. But that’s probably where it would stop, because I think he’d want to kill me if he knew what ran through my head when I get to see you.” Harry knew it was a good thing he wasn’t a mind reader, and that they’d gotten away with it for a bit so far. Yeah, he’d be taking a punch because he knew how Harry’s mind worked but he didn’t know that he fucking loved her- that this shit was different.
“Well… since we’re pretending all is right in the world right now…” Her hands splayed across his chest, chin tilted up as he pulled away from her throat. Starry eyes glazed over in love peering up just at him, not knowing she was the one he was orbiting. “Why don’t you enlighten me on the things you wouldn’t tell him?”
Harry's eyes glinted with amusement as he looked at her. "You really want to know, sweets?" He crooned, his voice low and sultry. "Alright then." His hands tightened around her waist, pulling her flush against him so she could feel just how much he wanted her.
"First... I'd never tell him that I think about you all the time. Like... right now, I'm imagining wrapping your legs around my waist and backing you up against that wall over there." His eyes flicked to the wall behind her before meeting her gaze again. "And how bad I want t’kiss you until you barely have any breath, make you borrow some of mine."
Y/N felt her breathing pick up, ironically enough, feeling trapped in the best way. Whenever Harry was around her she sort of wanted him to smother her, in a weird sort of way. it was hard to explain but close never felt close enough. Harry just had this sort of… way about him that had her itching to get close and bask in his own kind of warmth. It soothed her bones.
"N’then once you caught up, I'd keep kissing you until you were panting, so that cute little giggle that turns into that sexy moan that you do. Fuckin’ love that." he continued, his voice growing deeper as he showed little restraint with his words. It was easy to forget where they were when he got started. "And then... " He trailed off, leaning in to kiss her neck again, his breath hot against her skin. "Well, I probably shouldn't tell you the rest."
“Tell me.” She whined, in a way only tipsy Y/N wouldn’t feel shame for. “Please, baby?” Something she’d noticed was how strongly he did react to those little pet names so she kept them sparse, but seeing how he reacted always acted as a reward. “You can tell me. I want to know.”
He groaned low in his throat at the nickname, nipping at her earlobe before whispering to her the rest of the details he had been keeping away, waiting for the coaxing she had to pry out of him. "I'd slide my hand up your pretty little skirt and underneath your panties, feel how wet you already are for me. Slip a finger inside, nice n’slow at first, until you start to rock against my hand."
“Yeah? In front of all these people?” She was slightly shocked- but slightly not. Seeing as Harry had really struggled with not being able to publicly show her affection, she should have guessed he’d be handsy in all scenarios if he has the full permission- but this was more than she had anticipated. Even more so… She liked it.
"Mhm..." Harry agreed, his hands slowly sliding up her thighs, bunching the hem of her skirt as his hands went underneath without a second thought. "And if you kept making those little noises like you do when I touch you, no one would even notice."
Y/N she didn’t always make the best decisions but she knew she wouldn’t regret anything with Harry. As cocky as the man could be, as arrogant as he may appear, getting to know him up close and personal the last few months that they’d evolved into more than what they were… she knew he was a good guy. He was the type of guy she wanted. If he wasn’t, she wouldn’t be risking the peace her life had for it.
But no one ever said she wasn’t impulsive. “It is loud in here.” His body did hide hers in the corner, making it easy to be bolder. “So you should put your money where you mouth is, and touch me.”
"Oh, I plan on it" Harry said, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. He didn't waste any time in sliding his hand fully up her skirt, his fingers brushing against her skin as he made his way underneath her panties. His pace was careful, his touch light as he slowly slid a finger inside of her. Then soft hitch of her breath made him hum felt her bury her face in his chest to muffle any noise she might make. All talk, his girl, but he didn’t care too much- not when he felt that slick hole around his digit after being essentially edged all week. He continued to slowly pump his finger in and out, his thumb gently circling her puffy clit.
Biting his lip as he felt her clench around him, he could feel himself grow harder at the thought of being the one to make her feel like this. He added another finger, still moving slowly but picking up the pace slightly. "I want to take you out, show you off. I'm so tired of hiding you." Harry whispered in her ear, his breath hot against her skin. He pressed a kiss to her temple as he continued to move his fingers inside of her. "I want everyone to know that you're mine. Don’t want to have t’sneak off in vacation just to play with my girl’s cunt. Should’ve been making you cum the whole time." Harry's other hand came up to tangle his fingers in her hair, pulling her head back so he could kiss her properly. His eager tongue slipped into her mouth as he continued to move his fingers inside of her, feeling her wetness coat his fingers.
She was clinging to him, her nails digging into his arms as she tried to keep quiet. Her breath was coming in short gasps, her chest rising and falling rapidly. Face buried in his neck, her teeth sank into his skin to muffle her moans as he felt her shake against him. Y/N had never dabbled in public play before, and she knew no one could see, but the thrill of it all had her more wet than she had anticipated. Sure, the girl talked big game but she didn’t know what she would do if she had actually got caught being touched like this. Add in the fact that Harry’s tank top hugged him perfectly, his tattoos contrasting his skin, the broad shoulders and brush of his facial hair against her sensitive skin had her feeling drunk.
“That feels so fucking good.” She mewled, unsure if she wanted his mouth to keep her quiet or his chest.
"Shh..." Harry hushed her, his voice low and warning. "You have to be quiet, baby. Know it’s loud but y’don’t want anyone t’hear you." As much as he liked that idea, he knew his girl. That was something they’d need to work up to. Just feeling her dripping down his knuckles as he fingerfucked her was shocking enough, so he was more than pleased with this. His face nuzzled against her neck, his stubble scratching her sensitive skin. "Wrap your arms around my neck. Lean back against the wall."
Putting her trust in him was easy, or maybe it was the pent up sexual tension she hadn’t been able to release all trip as she did as he asked. The position made it look like a couple drunkenly making out, but his hand angled the farthest from the dancing drunk crowd was working slowly under her skirt.
Harry took advantage of her new position, his fingers slowly sliding in and out of her as his thumb continued to rub against her center. He felt her squirm against him, her arms tightening around his neck as she buried her face in his chest once more to muffle her moans. "Good girl... keepin’ so quiet for me... " He praised, his fingers picking up pace as he fought to keep himself calm. He glanced around quickly, making sure no one was paying attention to them, before he gently tugged her leg up, resting it on his hip.
The man had been good this whole trip. He’d played by her rules, trying his best to keep prolonged eye contact to a minimum, not leaning into her too much, not touching her, trying to act as he had in the past- but it was borderline impossible. Not with the way he felt about her. He wanted to rub all over her like a cat, wanted to wake up with her in the pretty room with the balcony and be the one to order her morning coffee. He was so tired of being good. In all honesty, the man didn’t care who found out anymore, not when being with her felt like this. Her little cunt gushing over his digits, dripping down the back of his hand as he curled his fingers just so.
"You're soaking through to my wrist..." Harry growled lowly, his other arm banded around her waist to keep her upright as her knees grew weak. He could feel her tensing up, her breath hitching as her body grew warmer. "Want you t’let go for me, love..." He curled his fingers one more time, pressing against her spot over and over as he rubbed his thumb in tight circles over her clit. Her whole body shuddered against him, her legs trembling as she tried to hold herself up. "You’re right there, baby. Can feel it. Let it go for me, my sweet girl... "
Harry buried his face in her hair as he felt her clamp down around his fingers, her body trembling slightly as she came silently against his hand. Her nails dug painfully into his shoulders as she bit down on his chest to keep quiet, her whimper muffled against his skin as she rode out her high. He held her leg tightly against his hip, his arm around her waist the only thing keeping her upright as her body shook with her orgasm. His fingers remained buried inside her, his fingertips gently stroking against her spot as he kept her on edge, prolonging her orgasm the best he could.
Pulling her face up, he dragged her mouth back to his. Their kiss was sloppy and desperate, Harry's tongue pushing into her mouth as he devoured her whimpers, groaning in response as he felt her cunt clenching rhythmically around his fingers. One of his favorite feelings, his favorite tastes. The only ways it could be better would be with his tongue on her clit or his cock inside of her. His hand shifted, tangling in her hair, holding her head still as he ate at her mouth, swallowing her noises as he kept his fingers buried inside her trembling pussy.
"Shh, baby... I've got you... " Harry cooed, his voice low as he gently worked her down. Slowly removing his fingers, he brought them to his mouth and licked her taste off of them before he lowered her leg back down to the ground.
“We’re telling him. Tomorrow.” He mumbled, wiping his spit soaked fingers on his shorts. “I’m not spending the rest of this trip with you not in my bed because he’s gonna have a fuckin’ tantrum. He’ll get it over, baby.”
Looking down at her, his eyes softened significantly as he gazed at her flushed face and messy hair. "You're staying in my bed tonight. I’ve gone long enough without it. Everything else, we’ll figure out in the morning."
#jarofstyles#harry styles one shot#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles smut#harry writing#harry styles imagine#harry drabble#harry styles blurb#harry styles writing#harry styles au#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfics#harry styles fanfictions#harry smut#harry fluff#harry angst#harry styles fluff#harry styles angst#bbf#brothers best friend
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Home • Mattheo Riddle x bff!fem!reader
Requested: No
Pairing: Mattheo Riddle x f!reader
Summary: y/n wants to make something special for Mattheo's birthday, but little does she know how special it is about to get.
Word count: 3.1K
Warnings: Fluff; English is not my first language.
A/N: Thank you guys so, so much for over 300 followers, love y'all!! That said, I don't think I like this one lol. Comments and feedback are always appreciated. Sorry for the typos. Hope you enjoy it! xx
Tag list: @helendeath @im-jesus @wolfyychan @blocked-zombieartist
Tag list for this story: @lilloves-34
“Aw, how lovely it is to see you two!”
“Hi, mum.”
Your mother held you warmly before turning to the person next to you.
“You’ve grown taller, Mattheo, dear.”
“As always, Mrs. y/l/n.”
She held him too, and Mattheo did his best to return the hug. His dark eyes turned to you and you offered him a small, affectionate smile. He suddenly looked more comfortable and smiled at your mother when she let him go.
“Leave your luggage here, dears, it can be unpacked later. Come, I’ve made you two some snacks.”
You and Mattheo follow her into the kitchen, and you can’t help but look at Mattheo. Partly because, well, it’s not like he wasn’t the most handsome boy you’ve ever seen, but mostly because you know he’s not always comfortable in your mother’s house, despite having living here for over two years now.
Mattheo and you had been best friends since your first year at Hogwarts. But as the years went by, knowing Mattheo was alone at Hogwarts during the holidays made you feel so upset that you started asking him if he wanted to spend it with you, which he accepted with a gratitude he had a hard time hiding. And, naturally, you also asked him if he wanted to come for summer break here as well. From the day Mattheo met your mother, she adored him and soon considered him a full member of the family, sending him sweets and gifts while at school just like she did for you, offering him gifts for his birthdays and Christmas as well, and he started coming every holiday without you asking him. You knew Mattheo was thankful for your mother’s hospitality and affection, as he always made sure to let her know, but you knew - despite him doing his best to hide it - that he felt that he somehow didn’t deserve the kindness and care you mother had shown him. It broke your heart to know he felt like that, but Mattheo wasn’t the kind to easily speak about his feelings so you never dared to bring it up, only sometimes telling him how happy you were that he was here, and that this house was his home.
But what your mother - or anyone else for that matter - didn’t know was that now having Mattheo around at all times was bittersweet for you. You absolutely loved having him in your house, where you knew he was finally loved and cared for, but it also made you two closer and made feelings for him grow - feelings you didn’t know were shared or not. It was slowly breaking you from the inside, and you didn’t know how to deal with it. Of course, you could talk about it with Pansy, who was your other best friend, or your mother, but you perfectly knew what they would both tell you: “tell him how you feel.” Merlin, no. You just couldn’t. Not only because if Mattheo didn’t feel the same way, your friendship would never be the same at best - or completely destroyed in the worst case scenario - and in both cases, you knew it wouldn’t take long for Mattheo to decide to leave your house. If I ever do tell him how I feel, it’s better to wait until we’re both out of Hogwarts and have our own places.
You walked in the kitchen to find your favourite snacks on the table.
“Aw, thanks, mum.”
“Yes, thank you, ma’am.”
“You’re more than welcome. Come, sit.”
The three of you sat around the table, you being next to Mattheo on one side and your mother on the other. You and Mattheo started eating while your mother asked about yours and Mattheo’s lives at school. You and Mattheo took turns in making conversation and even had a few laughs as you recalled some of the funny memories you had. After both your stomachs were full, you decided to go unpack your luggage. Mattheo had the same idea, and went to the bedroom that was now essentially his. You both finished at the same time, and found yourselves in the corridor of the second floor.
“I’ll go take a shower,” Mattheo said quietly. “If you don’t mind.”
“Of course not.”
He walked to the bathroom, but before he came in, you called for him. “Matty?”
He turned to you and you continued, “As always, this is your home.”
He gave you a single nod before quickly turning away and going into the bathroom. Letting out a small sigh, you went down downstairs in the living room and found your mother reading a book.
“Mum?”
She raised her head from her book, “Yes?”
You sat on the sofa next to her, a small smile on your face.
“You know Mattheo’s birthday is coming up?”
“Yes,” she nodded, “I already got his gifts and have everything I need to make his favourite cake. Why?”
“Well,” you said, “I thought that we could do something else for a change. We usually have quiet birthdays and it’s nice but I’d really like to do something for Mattheo this time.”
Your mother frowned, “Like what?”
“A surprise party?” you answered. “I could write to the boys and invite them to celebrate?”
“That’s a good idea, darling. I’ll soon go to Diagon Alley to buy some decorations and, well, more food and drinks.”
You smiled and went to give her a quick hug. “Thank you, mum. You’re the best.”
The evening was nice and quiet, spent playing chess with Mattheo on the ground in the living room like you always did, with your mother playfully cheering on the one winning from the sofa. Mattheo and you laughed a lot while playing, and it warmed your heart to see him relaxed and happy. You knew he was usually shy in the first days he came here, and while you perfectly understood it, you couldn’t wait for him to be his warm, chill, funny self again. The Mattheo you knew and loved. After dinner, your mother went to bed and soon after, Mattheo and you decided to follow. You both went upstairs, and you then went into the bathroom to take a shower and put on your pyjamas. Mattheo had his own bathroom, and he was likely getting himself ready to go to bed. Once you were done, you went to your bedroom, and you weren’t surprised to see Mattheo casually laying on your bed. You went to close the shutters, and when you got in bed, Mattheo’s arms immediately wrapped around your body, and you put your head on his chest. Mattheo and you had taken the habit of cuddling to sleep since the first night he spent here, where a discussion before going to sleep ended up with you guys falling asleep and for some reason waking up in each other’s arms. You found that you slept way better in Mattheo’s arms, so much so that this situation continued in Hogwarts - and it was made easier by your roommate Pansy essentially spending all her nights with Blaise. At first, you just enjoyed the feeling of warmth and safety Mattheo’s embrace gave you, but as your heart started to feel more than friendship for him, cuddling, just like his perpetual presence, became bitter-sweet. You still loved cuddling with Mattheo, in fact you didn’t even know if you could even sleep without him now, but you wondered if it was a good idea to continue like this. But even if I decided it was better to stop, how do I tell him?
“You alright?” you whispered, raising your head to look at him.
He nodded, “Yeah. Why?”
“I just want to make sure you’re comfortable here. This is your home, Matty. And it will always be. But if you’re feeling something different, I want you to tell me.”
“I’m fine, y/n, really. I’m grateful for your mum and you, you know that. Don’t worry your pretty little head over me.”
He kissed your hair, his hands started gently caressing your shoulder and the middle of your back. Soon after, you felt yourself going to sleep, and thought you heard a voice saying “sleep well, princess.”
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The next following days, Mattheo and you spent all of your time together. Every meal, every activity - playing Quidditch in the garden, reading, studying, taking a nap - was done with him. You loved it, but it made it harder to write to Mattheo’s friends to invite them to the surprise party or to prepare the said party without him knowing, but you still managed to do it while he was reading a book in the living room. Thankfully, all the boys answered your letter and said they would come, and thankfully also, your mother had time to buy what was needed and had the idea to hide it in her room, where you and her knew Mattheo would never dare to go.
On the day of his birthday, you woke up once again in his arms, and kissed him on the cheek as he was slowly waking up.
“Happy birthday, Matty.”
“Thank you, pretty girl.”
You had managed to get Mattheo agree to go to Hogsmeade in the beginning of the afternoon to get his favourite sweets from Honeydukes so your mom could prepare everything for the party and welcome the guests. You spent some time here, and once you knew everything was likely to be ready, you and Mattheo got back home, and you had a hard time not smiling. But you also suddenly worried about how Mattheo would react. Last year, Theo had a surprise party and Mattheo was happy to help prepare it. But does that mean he wants one for himself?
You opened the door, and entered the silent house. Mattheo looked around the corridor, and put his bag full of sweets on the floor in order to take off his jacket.
“Is your mom here?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “Let’s check the living room.”
Mattheo remained silent and approached said living room, and you had the biggest smile on your face when he suddenly stopped.
“Happy birthday!”
There was some cheering and applause, and Mattheo turned to you as you approached him.
“What-”
“It’s a surprise, Matty,” you couldn’t help but laugh at his confused face. “You deserved to have your friends and your brother with you today.”
He stared at you for a long minute, and you felt your heart beat faster, and he finally smiled at you.
“Thank you, y/n.”
You smiled back at him and gestured for him to go say hi to his friends, who were quick to wish him a happy birthday and greet him warmly, and his brother Tom, who was colder and more silent than the others. You looked around the room, and what your mother had done to decorate was incredible: there were numerous small fireworks up in the air alongside big golden letters saying “happy birthday Mattheo”, small decorations all around, and the long wooden table, usually bare, was also very much magically decorated. Mattheo hugged your mother to thank her while Pansy came closer to you.
“Well done, dear. If you’ve put it together for a friend, I can’t wait to see what you will do when you’ll be dating him.”
“Don’t start,” you warmed her. “Mattheo and I have always been friends and will always be.”
“We’ll see,” she teased.
You rolled your eyes and went closer to Mattheo. It was now time for him to blow out the candles and make a wish, and everyone was gathered around him as your mother brought his favourite cake decorated with whipped cream and full of magic candles.
“Happy birthday again, dear,” your mother smiled. “Make a wish.”
Mattheo closed his eyes for an instant and then blew out the candles. You applauded alongside the others, and everyone gave Mattheo their birthday gifts - books on Quidditch or history or wizards, Quidditch equipment, special quills, a watch - and then came your turn. Feeling your cheeks becoming red, you handed him your own gift, scared he might not like it. He unwrapped it and then saw the book.
“It’s, um, a photo album with some pictures we took along the years and, well, I wrote down some of my favourite memories with you.”
You heard some whispers among Mattheo’s friends - his brother Tom remained silent - but your only focus was on Mattheo’s reaction. He turned some of the pages, smiled at some of the pictures and read the memories you wrote down - and the note you had also written him about how much he meant to you and how special you genuinely thought he was. After a moment of apparently being lost in thoughts, he gently put down the book on the table near the others books he got and looked at you to give you a half-smile.
“Thank you, y/n.”
He gave you a quick, strange hug, and then turned to his plate. Feeling confused, you wondered if he truly liked the gift. You went to sit between your mother and Lorenzo, and as you ate the cake, you looked sometimes as Mattheo, who was now the center of attention, and as time went by, you saw him switching from his usual, funny self to a more quiet, uneasy self, barely listening to what Theo was saying to him. You guessed he was feeling overwhelmed, and as the others finished their plates and went to sit on the sofas, you saw Mattheo mumbling an excuse before leaving the room to go to the garden. You wanted to follow him to make sure everything was fine, but you knew he probably needed some time alone. After a while, you finally went outside, and found him sitting in the grass, lost in thoughts. You approached him slowly before sitting down next to him.
“Are you okay, Matty?”
He nodded, “Yes. Was it your idea to have this party?”
“Yes,” you said quietly. “Why?”
“Thank you, y/n. It means a lot,” he looked at the grass before shaking his head.
“You deserve it,” you said with a gentle voice.
“Actually, I’m not sure,” Mattheo said in a low voice, his head now down.
You frowned, confused. “What? Why?”
Mattheo turned to you and had a small sigh.
“Honestly, y/n. You and your mum have already so much for me. Letting me live here, giving me gifts, being there for me, and now this…What did I ever give you back? Nothing.”
You opened your mouth, but it took a few seconds to answer. “Mattheo, have you not read what I wrote in the photo album?”
He didn’t answer, still looking at the grass.
“Well?” you insisted. “What did the text say?”
“That you deeply cared about me,” he said, almost mumbling. “And that you thought of me as caring, and kind.”
“I meant it, alright?” you said in a more serious voice, wanting him to understand. “You’re the most exceptional person I know. You’re kind, gentle, funny, and caring. You’re a great friend to the boys, and you’re doing your best to have a good relationship with Tom, even when it’s not easy. You’re always there for me, you're always ready to spend time with me no matter the activity, and I know I always count on you whenever I need help or need comfort. You always know what to say, and you always listen to me when I have something to say. You’re also smart, and a damn good Quidditch player. I know you’re scared of becoming like your father, but I know you won’t. Because you two couldn’t be more different. And even if you started to be like him, we both know I’d smack some sense into you.” He had a hint of a smile and you went on, “Yes, sometimes you’re annoying and I think you love to fight too much, but nobody’s perfect, and I wouldn't want you to change for anything in the world. You’re the best person I know, Mattheo, and that’s why I’m in love with you.”
He whipped his head towards you, and that’s when you realised what you just said.
Oh, no. Oh, no. Merlin, no.
“I…Just…Forget what I said.”
You quickly rose up and almost ran back to the house, but you suddenly felt a warm hand on your wrist.
“Wait!” Mattheo said, “What the hell, you can’t leave like that after saying that to me.”
“Yes I can,” you retorted, panicking, “and that’s what I’m doing, just…forget it happened, alright?”
Mattheo let go of your wrist to run a hand through his dark curls.
“But, y/n, I can’t forget,” he said, frowning, as if it was obvious, “and I don’t want to. Did you really mean it?”
“Mattheo, I…”
“y/n, please,” he cut off more severely, both his voice and eyes now pleading. “Please, answer me.”
Doing your best to not look at him, you hesitated before nodding, feeling the need to disappear. He looked at you in a strange way, and you wondered what he was going to say.
“Look, Mattheo,” you started, “I know our f…”
“I love you too.”
It was now you turn to look at him with confusion. “What?”
“I love you too,” he whispered. “You’re…all I want, and all I need. You said this house is my home, but the truth is, you’re my home.”
All of a sudden, he stepped closer to you and brought his hand to your face, slowly caressing your cheek with all the gentleness in the world. You wondered what you should do next - put your hand on his? Put your own hand on his cheek? - but he made the decision for you, suddenly lowering his head towards yours.
“Fuck, y/n…”
And after that whisper, he pressed his lips on yours. It took you a few seconds to kiss him back, but when you did, he immediately grabbed your waist to pull you closer before putting a hand on the back of your neck. You let out a moan, and he deepened the kiss. You had a hard time believing what you had been dreaming for years now was actually happening but at the same time, Mattheo’s lips on yours and his hands on your body was all you could feel, all you could think about and all that mattered. When he finally pulled away, you were both out of breath.
“Does you saying that you love me and this kiss count as two more birthday gifts?” he suddenly asked.
“If you want,” you laughed.
“Then, it really is the best birthday I’ve ever had.”
You both smiled at each other before he kissed you again before taking you into his arms, holding you as if he died if he let go. You held him as well, feeling that, wherever you were, Mattheo was also your home.
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#harry potter#hp#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo riddle x reader#tom riddle#draco malfoy#lorenzo berkshire x you#blaise zabini#theodore nott#theo nott#regulus black#slytherin house#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin boys#benjamin wadsworth#reader insert#best friends to lovers trope#tom riddle x reader#theo nott x reader#blaise zabini x you#lorenzo berkshire#lorenzo berkshire x reader#female reader insert#hp fic#hogwarts
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It's Always Been You
james potter x fem!reader
Completed! Series
summary - You've known golden-boy James Potter for as long as you can remember. Though you don't just know him—he's your very best friend. But there's just one problem: you've fallen deeply, madly in love with him. Or two problems, if you count his thing for your friend Lily Evans. As time goes by, all you want is to get over him. Although, James seems set on making that the most impossible challenge of them all.
tags: James Potter x f!reader, childhood best friends to lovers, pining, unrequited love (or is it), "why are you pushing me away?", some miscommunication, Marauder!reader, hurt/comfort, angst, and a kiss that changed everything.
warnings: underage drinking, some mild cursing, occasional innuendo, she/her pronouns used, no use of y/n
a/n: this story has been a long time in the making ... but I'm very excited for it to be out! a very special thank u to everyone who supported it during its release, it rly means the world to me. with that being said, happy reading !! hope you guys enjoy <3 - e
check this out on my ao3!
*masterlist
read here:
Chapter 1 ->
Chapter 2 ->
Chapter 3 ->
Chapter 4 ->
Chapter 5 ->
Chapter 6 ->
Chapter 7 ->
Chapter 8 ->
Chapter 9 ->
Chapter 10 ->
Chapter 11 ->
Chapter 12 ->
*completed* <33
#james potter x reader#childhood best friends to lovers#james potter x you#james potter x y/n#james potter#marauders#the marauders#friends to lovers#love confessions#chapters#fiction#harry potter#marauders era#miscommunication#james fleamont potter#everythingisromant1c#Spotify#aaron taylor johnson#it's always been you#james potter imagine#hp marauders#the marauders era#hogwarts#remus lupin#sirius black#marlene mckinnon#james potter fanfiction#james potter fic#james potter fluff#angst with a happy ending
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Most
Being soulmates was everything to Harry. Even when he didn't want to be soulmates.
Because as much as that meant all-encompassing love, it meant there would be just as much pain.
Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Extra I
#harry styles writing#harry styles fluff#harry styles blurb#harry styles blurbs#harry styles smut#harry styles angst#harry styles imagine#harry styles imagines#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x reader#one direction#one direction writing#harry styles#most#best friend!harry#second chance romance!harry
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Feel Me*
Summary: The fourth part to Teach Me*
The search for kinks has only just begun as you and your best friend Harry officially cross...The Line.
...so what happens when it's over?
Word Count: 5.7k
*Contains Mature and Explicit Content. Take care of yourself first, only consume what you feel comfortable with!*
“Wait…wait.”
Harry stills, muscles tensing beneath your touch as you take hold of his face and guide his eyes to yours.
And you give him a moment to really see. To really understand what it is he’s agreed to.
No, you’re not exactly taking his virginity, but…that doesn’t make this any less real. Any less important, and more than anything…you want to take care of him.
“What?” he pants after a minute more of silence. He’s anxious. Terrified of why you’ve stopped him, and perhaps terrified that you’ve changed your mind. “What, Bee?”
You roll your lips into your mouth and squeeze your palms against his cheeks. “I just…I wanna do this right, I wanna…I wanna make sure this is what you want.”
His brows pull together as he hovers above you, knee still firmly pressed between your thighs as his hands hold him above your quivering frame. “How could I not want you?”
And it’s a sweet thought, but it certainly doesn’t answer your question. “Come on, you know what I mean—”
“No,” he interjects, rather aghast. “No, I don’t. How could you—look, I know this is…for science…or whatever, but I’m not here for the fucking fun of it. Okay, I’m here because…I meant what I said. It can’t be anybody else. It has to be you.”
It has to be you. The second time he’s said it, and your mind goes fuzzy.
You don’t want it to mean anything—it can’t mean anything. It can’t…but what if you wanted it to?
“Fine,” you agree, feigning confidence as you tilt your chin up. “But if you’re gonna fuck me…then fuck me. Do it right. Make it worth it—ruin me.”
You sit up just enough to tilt your head, drag your nails down his jaw, and ghost your lips over his.
“I know you can.”
When you finally kiss him, you feel him slip back into that possessive headspace you’re growing so accustomed to.
And it’s…
Everything.
He sucks on your tongue, takes hold of your hip to grind you down against his knee, and he savors. He savors each fucking second of you and your body and your willingness to be devoured.
He wants to devour you and you can’t fucking wait.
“How do you want it, hm?” he murmurs against your mouth, and your heart leaps into your throat. “How do you want me to fuck you? Just like this? Or do you want me to put you on your stomach? Take you from behind?”
Your cheeks warm at the tenacity in his voice. In the borderline possessive way he speaks, and you wonder how he’s so fucking good when he’s still so new to all this.
Perhaps he’s picked up a few things from porn, and while you’re almost amused, you’re mostly…grateful.
Because this Harry makes your stomach lurch, and your heart race, and your pussy flutter.
You shake your head, nose gently brushing back and forth against his as you do. “No. I’ve got a better idea.”
His brow cocks up as you place your hands on his chest and push him back.
You both straighten up into a sitting position before you give his chin a squeeze and nod toward the headboard.
“Go sit down for me, okay?” you instruct with a soft smile. “I’m gonna grab something.”
Curious but wildly intrigued, he nods faintly and retreats to the head of the bed.
And as he does, you slip off the mattress and make your way for the items beside his nightstand, rummaging through until you find what you’re looking for.
When you look back and meet his eye…your chest grows tight.
He’s mesmerized by you. So entranced by every move you make, and you’ll never be able to understand what his attention does to you. Why you feel so…worthy and important under his gaze.
His lashes flutter when he notices the object in your hand, that fervent hunger returning to his expression as you approach.
“What do you think?” you ask, kneeling beside his legs.
He almost smirks but seems to be too far gone in his fascination. “Yeah. For me or you?”
“You.” You move a bit closer. “If you’re okay with that.”
“Yes,” he breathes, head dropping back against the wall as he attempts to grab onto your body and bring you back to him. “Yeah. Whatever you wanna do, Bee. Trust you.”
Trust you. You feel somewhat relieved to know he’s still doing all right, and even more relieved to hear that he’s into it.
So, you nod your understanding, and unfurl the rope.
However, before you can go any further, you feel a firm squeeze to your side. “On one condition.”
You hesitate, lips parting as you wait for him to continue.
He then takes hold of your tank top and pinches the material tight between his fingers as he grins at you. “You have to take this off.”
With a snort, you swat his hands away to take hold of the hemline, peel it over your head, and toss it toward the floor.
And now…you’re completely naked to him.
You’d chosen to forgo a bra when getting dressed this morning. After all, it only would have slowed you down.
However, as his devious gaze falls down to your chest…you almost wish you would have brought one. If for no other reason than to give him a reason to pluck it from your body.
“Shit,” he exhales, nearly inaudible to your ears, but you do catch it. The same way you catch his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows thickly.
You shift closer, running your hand down his shirt this time. “Your turn.”
With a soft laugh, he sits up, and reaches behind his head to hook his fingers around the collar. Then, in one, swift motion, he pulls it from his body, and tosses it right on top of yours.
You take a moment to admire the two items of clothing, messily strewn together across the floor.
It almost feels symbolic. Your clothes as intertwined as your bodies. Your lives.
Your hearts.
You look back, blinking the thought free as you clear your throat and motion toward the headboard once again. “Go on.”
Fighting off a grin, he scoots back down and brings his wrists to the wooden pole, watching closely as you begin to loop the rope.
You’re careful not to pull the knot too tight but still snug enough that it won’t easily unravel. And you watch his expression for any signs of pain or discomfort, more than pleased when you don’t find any.
In fact, he seems rather excited about the prospect of being restrained.
Although that could just be because your tits are in his face.
Once you’re sure his arms are secure and everything is the way it should be, you lean back…and stand up.
Rather confused, Harry’s brow raises as you begin to walk around the bed and toward the door to his room. “Bee…”
You glance over your shoulder and toss him a wink. “Don’t move.”
His disbelieving scoff calls out to you as you disappear into his apartment, followed by a very agitated, “Bee, do not fucking leave me here!”
You laugh.
When you return, you find him pouting rather adorably as he slumps against the mattress, eyes downcast toward his knees.
His head lifts when he hears you, expression lighting up like a lost puppy, and your heart wrenches at the way he attempts to squirm up.
“The fuck did you go?” he huffs as you make your way back to him. “’Cause if that’s one of the kinks…I did not like it.”
With a smirk, you shake your head, and swing your leg over his hip to straddle his waist like you had before.
However, your lack of quippy retort only makes his head cock, and he studies you as you gently rest your hands along his stomach. “What? What’s wrong?”
But instead of responding, you simply dip down…and bring your mouth to his chest.
You feel his muscles quiver in anticipation, and perhaps lust as you push the object in your mouth toward your lips…and make contact with his skin.
The frigid ice against his warm body makes him reel, and you’re rewarded with a gasp as his arms begin to tug on the rope in retaliation.
But you don’t stop there. You drag it down his sternum, oh so slowly, as he braces himself against the headboard and squeezes his thighs together underneath your ass.
“Shit,” he murmurs as you move toward his left pec. “God, that’s…could’a warned me, you know—”
However, the rest of his comment suddenly melts into another frantic inhale as the cube of ice travels over the peak of his hardened nipple.
His head once again falls back against the wall, veins in his neck tightening as he grits his teeth together and hisses, “Fucking shit—”
And you’re rather proud of yourself for bringing him this kind of gratification as he shifts beneath you and bucks his hips.
You can feel exactly how much he’s enjoying this little detour and the harder he grows, the more inspired you become to torture him just a tad longer.
After all…this is in the name of science.
So, you indulge him. You suck the cube back into your mouth so you can press your tongue against his nipple and flick.
You’d had a feeling he might be into this kind of stimulation and when he whispers your name and something along the lines of, “Fuck...fucking killing me,” you know you were right.
You repeat the action a time or two more before rolling the icy substance back between your teeth to continue dancing it down his body.
And you feel him watch you. Feel him follow everything you do and again, you’re reminded of how comfortable you feel under his stare. How���safe.
You reach his belly button right as your fingers simultaneously reach for the band of his boxers, gingerly curling around the elastic as you eagerly look up.
“Can I?” you ask quietly, ready to stop at a moment’s notice if that’s what he decides.
But you aren’t too surprised to see that that’s far from what he wants, his eyes going wide as he nods quickly. “Yes. Yeah. ’Course.”
So, you begin to tug, guiding the fabric down his hips, thighs, and legs as you crawl back to make room.
Once they’re off, you toss them away, and settle back down over his thighs.
And there it is.
His cock.
You feel momentarily stunned to see it in person for the first time but the immediate rush of adrenaline that passes through you at the sight only makes you dizzy.
He’s…beautiful. Because of course he’s got a pretty cock to match that pretty face. And while you had a rough estimate on his size, you’re more than thrilled to confirm this theory.
“What, never seen one before?” he teases after he notices your rather obvious gawking.
You snort under your breath and move back down, palms smoothing along his waist as you bring the ice closer to his hip.
You follow the curve of his body, tiny droplets melting against his skin as you go. And it’s so fun. So deliciously fun to do this to him, to trail the freezing substance over the tattooed ferns below his stomach until the goosebumps rise.
To hear him curse to himself when he feels the way you drench his thigh, the way you grind against it in an effort to find your previously denied release.
And then…you drag it even further down.
When it grazes the base of his cock, his entire body goes still, and you watch as his eyes nearly roll back from the brief but significant contact.
“Fuck, Bee,” he groans, so low and deep in the back of his throat that it makes your skin warm. “Shit…shit—”
You trail your lips toward the tip, letting the ice melt along the way as he strains against the restraint once more.
You can tell he wants to touch you. Wants to take a fistful of your hair and tug. And you’d quite enjoy that but right now…no, right now the power is yours.
And you’d love to spend all fucking night getting a taste of him. Even without the extra water, you can feel yourself salivate at the very idea. And perhaps one of these days you’ll return the favor, but for right now…there’s something else you have in mind.
You suck the excess moisture off his cock and gather it into your mouth before sitting up and moving closer.
“Bee,” he whispers, but it sounds more like a whine. “Shit, please…please—”
You place one hand on his shoulder and the other below his jaw, fingers pressing firmly into the sides of his cheeks as you force his head back.
Then, you nod your chin at him.
After deciphering the silent instruction, he immediately opens his mouth and sticks out his tongue, eager to accept your offering.
The spit dribbles down, landing directly in the middle as his lashes flutter and his fingers curl into his palms.
Then, he swallows.
Like a good boy.
You squeeze his chin once more as a gesture of appreciation before leaning down to kiss him.
This one is slower. Softer.
Purposeful.
He takes extra care of you through this kiss, making sure to convey his gratitude and adoration. He might not be able to say it with words…but you know.
However, the rather tender moment passes quickly as his cock begins to graze against clit. Reminding you both of what you really need.
He curses against your bottom lip, nose nudging your cheek as he whispers, “Shit…Bee…please. Please, can’t…can’t—”
“I know,” you say in return, nodding fervently as you lean back to position yourself onto your knees. “I know. Gonna start slow, okay?”
“Yes,” he breathes, head rolling back. “Yes, go.”
Once you’re in the right spot, you reach out to take hold of his cock and run your palm up, allowing him a moment to revel in the feel.
And it’s everything. His face, his sounds, his fucking body.
You’d whimper if it were any other time, but you focus your attention on his face. On making sure you aren’t pushing him too far. On making sure this is still what he wants.
He sucks the air through his teeth as he fights the urge to thrust up into your hand. And you almost feel bad for how hard he’s trying to restrain himself, but he’s doing so good.
“S’okay, Har,” you murmur, flicking your thumb over his tip. “I’ve got you.”
“I know,” he says, so instantly, and so sincerely that it almost hurts. “I know. Always do.”
You smile and scoot a bit closer before taking a beat. “Do you…did you get the condoms?”
He jerks his head toward the nightstand. “Second drawer.”
You nod and look over, but don’t move to retrieve them. “And you…definitely want to use one?”
His brow cocks up, curious to your premise, so you rush to elaborate.
“Just because…I mean, they’re really important,” you explain, feeling rather sheepish. “Like…super important. You know, for safety, and…babies and shit.”
“Right,” he muses in agreement, growing oddly smug. “No, yeah. With you so far.”
“And since it’s still one of your first times, you know…I wanna make sure,” you continue. “’Cause…it’s important.”
“Right. You said that.”
“Right. So…yeah. Just…wanna make sure. ’Cause some people choose to go without. Which is fine. If everybody is clean and…you know, being safe and everything.”
“Mhm.”
“Which I am, by the way,” you add, lip between your teeth as you meet his eye. “Clean, I mean. Haven’t been with anyone since Eric, and I got tested like three times afterward just to make sure he didn’t fuck me over.”
Harry exhales a gentle laugh. “Right.”
“Yeah…so. I am,” you repeat, now glancing down at the sparrows painted across his collarbones. “And…as far as baby’s go, you know…it’s not…it wouldn’t be…I can’t…you know.”
His eyes soften at the reminder, and you imagine he’d be pulling you into his chest right about now if he had the ability to do so. “Yeah…”
You simply wave his remorseful expression away. “Yeah…so, I guess my question is…do you?”
And you want to wince at how idiotic you sound, rambling on and on about condoms and sex education, but you suppose this is a conversation to have…you just wish you were better at it.
A smile begins to curl around his mouth. “Do you?”
You can tell he already knows the answer, but you fidget, nonetheless. “I mean…I want to do whatever you want to do.”
“Well…I’m clean,” he reports, focus flicking across your face, attempting to encourage you. “And I think it should be pretty fucking obvious which I’d prefer, but…this is your call, Bee. Always your call. Just wanna fuck you.”
You take a deep breath, rather pleased by his answer as you look down at his cock. “Well…then, I think it’s only fair we do this right.”
“Yeah?” He almost sounds hopeful as he lifts his head. “Y’sure?”
You nod silently, teeth once again tugging on the flesh of your bottom lip. “Yeah. Wanna be able to feel you. Really feel you.”
“Then fucking feel me,” he murmurs, and you hear the sound of his arms pulling against restraint. “God, fucking feel me, Bee. Please…can’t fucking stand it anymore—”
“I know, I know. Okay,” you agree quickly, scooting back up so you can guide yourself closer. “Okay, are you su—”
“If you ask me if I’m sure one more fucking time, I’m gonna lose my goddamn shit,” he exhales, and you have to smirk.
You bring his tip toward the mess between your thighs and innocently allow it to drag through.
And it’s soft, and slow, and gentle…but it ruins you.
Ruins you both. His head drops back into the wall with a thud while your chin drops to your chest in ecstasy.
Everything.
He swallows a string of curses as he braces himself for you to continue, and you do, almost without thinking. So desperate to feel him inside you that you throw caution to the wind and just take.
Sinking down onto him feels like placing the final piece into the puzzle. Satisfying, and whole, and complete.
The full picture.
You’ve never felt so…filled. So satiated. It’s fucking perfect and your jaw just about drops as you stretch around him and realize one very important thing:
There’s no coming back from this.
Because this—him—is what you’ve been missing. This one moment, this one realization, this one acceptance.
Your body and his, connected in a way they never have been before.
The years of trust, and understanding, and love you’ve built come to a point right here, right now.
This is what needed to happen. This is what was missing from your friendship.
The line you needed to cross…to understand.
His wrists squeeze against the rope, desperate to break free and touch you as you begin to find a good rhythm. And you wish he could. Want more than anything to feel his nails down your back, around your body, pulling at your skin until you bleed.
“Shit…shit,” he seethes before bucking up into you. “Goddamit, Bee…s’fucking perfect.”
Your palm finds his chest, fingers clawing at the butterfly on his sternum as you roll yourself over his cock. “I know,” you manage to whisper but it’s lost beneath the gentle pants slipping from your lips. “I know—”
“Fuck…” His groans grow louder as the sound of his cock slipping in and out of your cunt begins to echo around the room. “God, fuck you for keeping this from me for so long.”
You almost laugh but don’t have the strength to follow through as you begin to move a bit faster. “What can I say…wanted to make you work for it.”
“Yeah? I would. Promise. Fucking do anything you wanted,” he says between gritted teeth, the muscles in his jaw tightening as he attempts to thrust up. “Fucking anything, Bee…just to feel you. Exactly like this…can fucking feel you—”
When you sink all the way down, you both just about lose it, lewd and borderline pornographic moans ripping from your throats.
He throws his head against the wall for a second time, a violent display of outrage and pleasure as he’s forced to keep from ruining you.
And you love it. Love every second of the way he’s forced to simply take what you offer.
Already you can feel the way you’re hurtling toward that edge, already too wound up from everything else that’s transpired so far.
But you try to resist. Try to force yourself to carry on because you want to stay here forever, want to feel this kind of euphoria until your lungs give out.
And looking at him while you ride his cock is sinful. It’s unfair because he’s so…he’s so. And everything about him and this moment could wreck you forever. Could permanently alter your brain chemistry until all you know is him.
“Go,” he suddenly murmurs, nodding his chin toward you. “Go on, make yourself come. Please. Please, gotta feel you come around me, baby, please.”
You nod quickly, free hand coming up to your clit as you do as instructed, fingers rubbing in fast circles.
You cry out at the added spark, pussy clenching around him as he takes a deep breath and watches you. He watches you. He always watches you, and the soft green in his eyes just about does it.
“Har—” It’s a depraved whimper, bleeding through your anxious gasps, and he swallows at the sound.
“I know. Fucking know,” he says, tanned skin beginning to glisten with little droplets of sweat. “Come ‘ere. Gimme your fingers.”
Enthralled with the idea, you take your hand away from your clit and bring it to his mouth.
Your arousal paints across his lips like a mural and he sighs as he sucks you in, tongue lapping across your thumb like a man dying of thirst.
And the sight of his cheeks hollowing as he tastes you, as he consumes you, as he moans around your finger’s tips you over.
No, it shoves you, stars exploding behind your eyelids before you can fully understand what happened.
You lose time. Lose everything except him. Don’t understand a goddamn thing except for this feeling in your cunt, and in your chest, and in your lungs.
Your hand falls from his mouth to his stomach as you scratch at his skin in an attempt to brace yourself and remain steady.
“Fuck…fucking shit,” he hisses before it dances into some sort of debauched growl. “God, there it is. There it fucking is, come on. Give it to me, Bee. Fucking give it to me, that’s right…s’fucking it—”
And no sooner have you managed to grasp onto reality do you see him suddenly snap his wrists free of the rope and lunge for you.
In a matter of seconds, he’s got you wrestled onto your back as he grinds down between your thighs, cock once again pushing against your cunt as you gasp.
“Har,” you nearly scold, rather insulted by how easily he managed to break free. “Wha—”
“Wanted you to have your fun,” he grumbles as pushes your right leg further open. “And you did, didn’t you? Had your fucking fun. Now it’s my turn.”
You get ready to reply but miss the opportunity as he slips back in, filling you to the hilt as you roll your head back and gasp.
“Shit—” It’s a strangled mewl, pathetically whiny as he buries his lips into your neck to take a bite. “God, Har…”
He hums at the sound of his name, and the low vibrations make you flutter around him. “Knew you liked it rough.”
“Could say the same about you,” you retort breathlessly. “Should I start calling you Daddy, too? S’that another kink of yours?”
You’re only half joking but the way you feel his dick twitch inside you as he makes a rather animalistic noise against your throat suggests it might not be so funny.
You aren’t opposed to using the pet name if a partner likes it. In fact, you’ve used this very one once or twice before. Because the name itself isn’t what does it for you…it’s their reaction to it.
So, your fingers find his hair, and you pull at the roots as you ghost your lips over his ear and whisper, “Hurt me, Daddy. Come on.”
He groans with so much tenacity and lust that you swear you could come from the sound alone.
His thrusts become slow and focused. Angry, almost. You’ve only ever seen Harry get like this a handful of times. His passion sometimes overtakes his common sense, and if he’s really furious (or really drunk), he becomes a completely different person.
And right now…you’re more than okay with that.
His fingerprints leave memories on your thighs as he holds you open. As he presses your body to the bed so he can have you exactly the way he wants. As he pulls himself out just to slowly drive himself back in.
It almost hurts the way he drags this on. The way he tortures you with a taste of more. The way the room is filled with the sounds of him and you and everything in between.
And then…there’s a sharp smack to your outer leg.
So zealous and so loud that you moan from the subtle pain. From the understanding that you’ve just been spanked and the understanding that you fucking loved it.
He does it again. Harder this time. Quicker. Then, two more times for good measure, just to feel the way your body clenches around his cock.
If you had the strength to say thank you…you just might.
“Fucking look at you,” he grunts, lips trailing down your chest as he flicks his tongue over your nipple. “Look so fucking pretty like this, don’t you? Filled with my cock. Just dripping for me.”
You choke on a silent cry as you rake your hands through his curls.
His nose nudges under your jaw. “Who would’ve thought? My innocent, baby Bee…just a desperate, little whore.”
You feel breathless as he brushes his palm up your stomach to take hold of your other tit and squeeze.
“Isn’t that right, baby girl?” he muses, almost as if to himself. “Just needed someone to come along and take care of you.”
Your head rolls back as he sucks bruises into your neck, a whimper instantly getting stuck when his teeth make contact with your vein.
“Is that what you need?” His thrusts begin to pick up. “Need me to throw you around? Ruin you? Treat you like you’re nothing but a fucking hole?”
You might not be used to hearing this kind of talk from him but goddamn his voice was made for comments like this. For promises like this, for filthy fucking words like this.
It sounds so natural coming off his tongue and you squeeze your eyes shut as the pain and pleasure planted deep within your stomach begins to coil.
“You do,” he whispers, touch moving back up to your throat. His fingers find their designated spot over your pulse point, and he presses until he can feel your heartbeat hammering against his hand. “You fucking do…want it so bad. Want me to give it to you.”
Yes, yes, yes, you think but don’t say. After all, he’s already far too smug.
And you’re so close to another. So close to just depleting yourself for his pleasure and you wouldn’t have it any other way. As long as he keeps fucking you, as long as he stays right here forever…you won’t care.
“Gonna come for me again?” he asks as his rhythm begins to pick up. “Come on, baby girl. Fucking gimme another. Let me feel you again. Gotta feel you.”
You nod fervently as you take hold of his face and bring it to yours, kissing him so hard, it nearly knocks the wind from your lungs. “Yes, Daddy.”
And you can feel the repercussions of the nickname rolling through his body as the hand around your throat snaps closed and his cock just about slams into you with determined force.
“S’my fucking girl,” he groans against your bottom lip before tugging on it with his teeth. “Come on, Bee. Right fucking now. Come.”
And before you have the chance to oblige, he takes his fingers from around your throat, sucks them into his mouth, and then places them on your clit.
He pinches, and he circles, and he presses until you have no other choice but to do as he asked.
You’re vaguely aware of the way he follows after you but when you feel it—when you feel him and the way he fills you…you simply succumb.
To all of it. To him, to this decision, to this feeling.
His sounds are like a symphony. Like heavenly music being sung directly into your ear as he tries to work you both through your high. As he continues to play with your cunt like a toy, almost as if hoping to encourage a third from you.
You move to wrap your arms around his shoulders and keep him on top of you. He’s heavy but the weight feels…freeing. Almost as if he was always meant to be right here.
And as the silent seconds continue to tick by while you both catch your breath, you wonder if this is finally where things change. If crossing this line will be the thing that ruins you both. That ruins your friendship.
You can’t speak for him, but you…you’ve never felt so content.
He is your puzzle piece.
Your perfect fit.
You expect him to pull out and climb off you rather quickly, much like Eric used to.
But Harry is not Eric, that much is certain.
Because Harry…refuses to let go.
He wraps one arm around your body and just…stays. Face nuzzled into your neck, thumb stroking your skin in soft, soothing circles.
He’s quite warm, and it’s almost too hot to have him on you like this…but you don’t mind.
“Are you…okay?” he exhales after a moment, and you nod softly.
“So fucking okay,” you hum, eyes fluttering shut. “Yeah. Was really fucking good, Har. Oh, sorry…Daddy.”
You feel him smile against your skin. “Good.”
“Are you okay?”
This time, he nods. “So fucking okay,” he mimics with a soft laugh. “Felt so good, baby girl.”
And you aren’t sure why, but this nickname makes your cheeks warm, and your heart race, and your ears ring.
“Shit,” he hisses when he feels you clench around him. “Bee…you’re gonna kill me, don’t do that.”
“Sorry, sorry,” you whisper, fighting a smirk. “S’kind of your fault, though.”
“Oh, is it?”
“Yeah. Where did you even learn all that, anyway? How To Talk Dirty for Dummies?”
“Oh, you fucking—”
With that, his arms tighten around your exhausted frame before he rolls you both over until he’s on his back and you’re lying on his chest.
“Har,” you laugh, attempting to squirm out of his hold. “Stop, for fuck’s sake—”
“No,” he says simply, tucking your head under his chin as he keeps you still. “We’re not done.”
You smile again as your ear presses to his heart. “Oh, we’re not, huh?”
“Nope. Aftercare, right?”
“Yeah, but it normally doesn’t involve squeezing your partner to death.”
“Really? ’Cause it kind of seemed like you liked me squeezing you.”
“Yeah, but not now.”
“Fine, so teach me.”
“Teach you what?”
He nuzzles his cheek against the top of your head. “How to take care of you.”
You can’t hide the giant grin that spreads across your face as you roll your eyes. “For one…you can loosen your grip.”
“Yeah…no.”
“Harry.”
“Bee.”
You shake your head, amused, as the room falls silent. You focus in on his steady breaths. The way his heart thumps against his ribcage. Comforting and familiar.
You brush your palm back and forth along his side, absentmindedly continuing to keep the tender moment going. Desperate to feel even closer to him, despite the fact that he’s still half inside of you.
After a minute more of comfortable quiet, you feel his lips ghost your temple. “Bee?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you regret it?”
Your lashes flutter shut. “No. Not at all.”
“Are you sure?”
“Positive.” You lean up just enough to see him, forcing him to acknowledge the truth. “I’d never regret you.”
The side of his mouth pulls up in a gentle smile. “Good.”
Pleased, you reach for one of his arms, fingers trailing down to his wrist as you delicately bring it up to your mouth.
He watches you with wide eyes as you dance your mouth along the subtle red marks across his skin. A gift from the rope, and when you press your lips into the faint bruise…you hear his breath hitch.
“This…can be a part of aftercare,” you whisper as you travel around his hand. “Wrist check.”
“Wrist check,” he repeats, as if in a daze.
You nod. “Making sure that you didn’t get too hurt. That you’re okay. Letting you know you did good.”
You linger for a moment, almost wishing the kiss would melt into his skin, and you feel his heart rate increase.
“And you did,” you say softly, looking up. “Did so good for me.”
His lids seem to grow heavy as he looks at you through a lust-filled haze, and you can feel his fingers squeezing around your hip.
And in this moment…you exist. Your past, and your present, and your future coming to a point right here as you lay in his arms.
Terrified of what happens next, you shake the impending implications free and nuzzle yourself back under his chin, eyes squeezing shut.
You can feel him suck in a sharp breath and hold it.
You do the same.
“Bee?” he murmurs.
“Yeah?”
A beat.
His grip tightens.
“Watermelon.”
(Alternatively titled: Fuck Me 😗)
Next Part:
~ Love Me* (Pt. 5)
Previous Part:
~ Hurt Me* (Pt. 3)
~ Full Teach Me Masterlist
~ Other Harry Blurbs
~ Full Masterlist
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call it what you want ✨ pt6
And so, the battle between guilt and jealousy continues…
masterlist
word count: 4.1k
warnings/tags: harry x reader, best friends to lovers, secret relationship, angst, fluff
As you were waking up, you could feel the cover rubbing against your bare skin. You completely forgot you went to sleep naked last night, even after Harry took initiative to clean you up, you didn’t get dressed. Neither did he. His body was molded into yours, his strong arms wrapped around you.
Your eyes opened and you groaned softly, not sure of the time but the sun was peeping through the blinds. Harry felt you move a little and it caught his attention. He had been awake for a few minutes already, and he was just waiting for you. He shifted his head back to look at your pretty face. Your cheeks were flushed and your eyes were barely opened.
“G’morning.” He uttered softly, a smile shaping to his lips as your eyelids lifted open more.
You licked your lips and sweetly smiled back. “Morning.”
“How do you feel?” His brows furrowed slightly as you snuck your hand up to his face.
Your fingertips softly touched his skin before sliding up his jaw. There had been a fascination with touching him building up in you over the past few weeks and last night’s events only made it stronger. He didn’t mind, though. He quite enjoyed it.
“Pretty good.”
“Not sore or anything?”
You shook your head as your eyes shifted to his neck. You silently began to admire the veins hiding beneath his skin. The little things about him were easily becoming your favorite things.
“I can’t.. believe we actually.. did that last night.” You gently laughed as the thoughts began replaying in your mind.
“Me either.. but everything’s okay, though, right? You’re okay with it?” As usual, Harry was trying to get your total reassurance that everything was fine.
“Well.. I have to be. We can’t undo it.”
He licked his lips and swallowed the lump in this throat. “I mean.. um, you liked it?”
“Yeah..” You nervously nodded. “It was.. amazing.”
Harry gave you a sigh of relief. “Yeah? It was so amazing.”
You grinned back and let out a squeal as his mouth started to attack your face, leaving sloppy kisses across your skin.
Sometime around lunch, a couple of your friends came up with an idea of going to play tennis at the recreational courts, and although you weren’t keen on the idea.. Harry thought it would be fun. He mentioned something about missing a few days at the gym and needing the exercise. You were not thrilled about him leaving you, so you lied and said you wanted to tag along. Harry believed you when you told him it would be a fun idea.. he didn’t realize you were lying.
Even though your day didn’t go as planned, you still were able to be with him. Your plan of relaxing on the couch or in bed all day with him rotting away while watching movies would have to happen another time. It was a hard pill to swallow, but no matter what happened between you two last night.. you had no choice but to move on.
So there you were at the tennis court sitting on a bench with one of your closest girl friends, Stephanie. A few of the guys showed up but it was just the two of you girls there. You opted to sit on the bench with her and leave the rough housing for the boys. They were way more competitive anyway. Harry and your brother were on a team so they were being extra obnoxious together.
Your eyes were glued to Harry’s duffle bag sitting on the ground next to the bench. It contained his water bottle and a change of clothes. You wanted to snatch his keys up, grab him, and run for the car to escape.. but you couldn’t. Your day with him would end after this.. You came in your own car to not raise any suspicions.
“I have a confession.” Stephanie sighed heavily next to you, her sudden words pulled you from your mindless trance.
“What is it?” You asked, adjusting yourself so you were now facing her.
She grinned, then rolled her eyes to herself. “It’s so stupid. Promise you won’t tell anyone?”
You laughed, then nodding. “I promise.”
“Harry’s kind of cute.”
Her words instantly made your heart jolt. You looked to her eyes and realized that she was staring at a him. All you wanted to do was scream at her and tell her off, but you stayed still and played it cool.
“What?”
“I mean, yeah. He isn’t ugly. He’s always been cute, what do you think?”
You shifted your eyes to Harry, who was currently laughing with celebratory joy after winning the first match. Austin was mocking the other guys and waiting for them to start the new match. Harry was covered in a layer of sweat. His sleeveless shirt didn’t leave much to the imagination with its low cut sides. The hem raised every time he swung his arm up, exposing his lower abdomen. You weren’t aware of how jealous you were until just now. You licked your lips and let out a fake laugh.
“That’s weird. I’ve known him forever.”
“God knows I have no chance and I don’t actually want one.. I was just admitting my observation to you. I feel like some of our other friends would mock me and tell him.” She shrugged as her eyes dropped down to her phone. She was reading a text she received.
“Yeah.. I wouldn’t say anything to him. It’s just weird to hear.”
Stephanie smiled, then looked over at you. “So you don’t think he’s cute?”
For a moment, you had a feeling of paranoia. Was Stephanie trying to get you to say something that would lead to a confession? Was she trying to get you to admit that you and Harry had more going on than just a friendship? Was there some sort of plan or scheme your friends came up with and put her in charge of? Was something happening.. or were you just very guilty? You hated lying to the people you care about - including your family. Lying about the situation with Harry was difficult and you made you feel horrible at times, but it was your life and no one else's…
You shook off the thoughts and sighed. “No.. not really. He’s not my type.”
The following ten minutes were absolute torture for you. There was a raging fire in your gut and you knew it was pure jealously. Stephanie had never admitted anything like that to you before, regarding Harry. You wondered if she was just lying about not having a thing for him to save herself some embarrasment. There was nothing else you could think of, not even Harry could distract you. You were watching him but your brain wasn’t registering him at all.
After a while, he glanced your way and noticed you were practically pouting on the bench. He made a mental note to call for a break after this match so he could check on you. Stephanie, on the other hand, wasn’t aware of your mood. She was spending most of her time watching the guys and laughing as they missed the ball.
“I’m going to run to the bathroom, do you need to go?” She asked as she nudged your knee with hers.
“No, I’m good.”
She mumbled something you didn’t care to hear as she stood up and grabbed her small purse. She disappeared from the court and you felt a bit of relief lift off your shoulders. Harry took the opportunity to call for a break. Austin and the other guys ran off towards the bathrooms, too, leaving you two alone.
“Hey, peach.” Harry jogged over to you, smiling as you looked up at him.
“Hi.” You whispered back, huffing as he sat down next to you.
“What’s wrong? Are you getting hot?” He asked, resting his hand on your thigh.
The intimate feeling of his sweaty palm against your skin made you swallow harshly. The realization of how this would look from another’s perspective took over your thoughts. You grabbed his wrist and tried to nicely push his hand back. The intent wasn’t to be mean to him, just to silently tell him it wasn’t appropriate now.
You shook your head. “No.. I’m fine.”
Harry frowned, easily noticing that you weren’t okay. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
“Don’t call me that here.” You snapped, crossing your arms on your chest.
He had only called you that a handful of times last night, and as much as you liked it, you didn’t want to hear it. Liked would be an understatement though, each time the word slipped from his mouth your body received a wave of euphoric energy - it was like the word itself could give you an orgasm. It was a new term he started to use, and it was obviously meaningful to you both already.
“Okay, m’sorry.” He wasn’t sure why you were being this way towards him, and he didn’t want to make it worse. “Anything I can do?”
You rolled your eyes and looked at him, instantly feeling your stomach drop. You were being rude to him when he hadn’t even done anything. This was going to be the last time you saw him for a few days and you didn’t want to end it on a sour note. You let your angry pout fade away and your eyes fall back to your lap.
“I can’t tell you what’s wrong.”
“Who said you couldn’t tell me?” He asked, slipping his hand onto your lower back. He knew that showing affection would be risky, but he didn’t care anymore. You weren’t okay and it was worrying him.
“I said.”
He moved his hand under your shirt and that made you anxious. Your brother could easily come back from the bathroom within seconds and witness this.
“Peach.. don’t be upset, okay? Whatever it is.. just ignore it.”
“I can’t ignore it.” You huffed back, still slightly annoyed.
Harry leaned into you and pressed a kiss to your temple. “You let things worry you too easily, love.”
“Just forget it.” You mumbled back, pushing him away from you.
He stood up, deciding to leave you alone. The last thing he wanted to do was upset you any more than you already were. If he had something wrong, he figured you’d tell him. So maybe it wasn’t him.. maybe something else had happened and you were being stubborn. That was exactly what was happening..
When Stephanie returned, you had hoped she wouldn’t bring Harry back up. Unfortunately, she did. You were focused on Harry as he swung his arm back to hit the tennis ball. Her sudden talking interrupted you.
“You know.. I got to thinking.. Harry’s never really had a relationship, at least not since I met him.”
You clenched your jaw and tried to think about something else as you replied. “A lot of our group haven’t been successful with those.”
“Hm, he must be.. like bad in bed or something. He’s too attractive to be single.”
You were somewhat repulsed by her comment. Even if you had no feelings for Harry at all, you wouldn’t say something like that. His sex life was definitely none of her business and making statements on it was weird.
“Or maybe he’s so good that he doesn’t want to be tied down.” She added.
“I mean.. I don’t really think about that when it comes to any of my friends. He probably just can’t find anyone decent around here.” You said with a shrug, pretending not to care.
“Well, Heidi found someone. You’re in the wedding, right?”
You were glad she moved past Harry again. “Yeah.”
“It’s in what, like, four weeks?”
“Something like that.”
Stephanie started to mumble about the wedding but you didn’t care to listen. Harry let out a heavy groan that caught your attention and reminded you of what occurred last night. You bit down on your cheek and watched closely as he struggled to hit the ball again. He was straining himself and you were concerned with him pulling a muscle. The exact same thing happened to you during the last baseball game, and that cramp was not fun to endure.
“Have you been talking to anyone recently? I remember you telling me about that one guy a few weeks back.” Stephanie stepped in the way of your fixation yet again.
“Um, not really. He was nice, but he was weird.”
She laughed a little. “Too weird for our friends? Have you met us?”
The truth was that you were talking to a guy recently but things ended abruptly on your end. You blocked his number and decided to not say anything about ending the situation to him. You had only met him once and there were no plans for a date. Besides, Harry completely took over that area of your life and he was worth way more than some guy you met at a bar. He wasn’t weird or unattractive or anything along those lines, but you simply weren’t interested. The day Harry kissed you, everything changed.
“Ah, fuck!” Harry yelled out.
You jumped up, terrified to know what had gone wrong. You were becoming more angry with Stephanie because she kept distracting you from Harry. Despite being concerned, you refrained from rushing to his side.
“Time for a break!” Austin said through a laugh.
“I’ll take his spot!” Stephanie said excitedly as she grabbed her own racket and joined your brother on the court.
Harry plopped down on the bench next to you, but not as close as before, with his hand gripping his upper arm tight. You swallowed the lump in your throat and scooted closer.
“Are you okay?”
He huffed. “Caught a cramp.”
“Do you want some water? You’re all.. sweaty.”
He nodded, his eyes still hadn't met yours. You reached into his bag and grabbed his water bottle. You popped open the cap and handed it to him.
Your stomach filled with butterflies as you watched the water run down his chin and drip onto his thighs. He was messily throwing the bottle up, sloshing water all over the place.
“If you weren’t so competitive.. you wouldn’t try so hard and hurt yourself.”
“M’not hurt. It’s just a cramp.” He made a weird face that rubbed you the wrong way. It reminded you of one of your brother's annoying sarcastic faces..
“I’m just saying..”
He didn’t reply, which sort of hurt your feelings a bit more. You were rude to him earlier but you didn’t think it would cause him to be the same way towards you. Normally, he does whatever he can to make you smile or laugh or feel better. Right now, he was giving you exactly what you gave him.
“Do you want me to massage it?”
He let out a breath that seemed more like a sigh. “You don’t want us to touch here, so.. no.”
For some reason - one you weren’t ready to admit to, your emotions were on edge and you felt your heart crack. Harry was never mean to you, he hardly ever said anything negative to you. He’s never really raised his voice or stayed mad at you before. You didn’t like this.
“Okay.”
He sat the bottle down on the ground and leaned his back against the bench. You didn’t know what to say, so you just kept your eyes on him. He was staring off, mindlessly watching the new match. Part of you was worried that he was hurt and he was just lying about being okay, while the other half was nervous that you were annoying him.
Harry’s roaming eyes caught your stare and he furrowed his brows, unsure of why you were looking at him the way you were.”Why are you staring at me?”
The coldness of his words made your stomach fall. You looked down to your lap and instantly everything shifted. You could feel your face reacting as the emotions rushed through your body. All you wanted to do was cry.
“You don’t have to be so mean..” Your voice was gentle, and you got his full attention when you stood up from the bench and walked towards the gate.
You heard footsteps behind you, but you didn’t stop. The destination was the women’s bathroom where you could get some alone time. Harry was hot on your trail though and just as you reached the door, he grabbed your waist and spun you around.
Instantly, he frowned. Tears were swelling in your eyes and your cheeks were red. He knew they weren’t just red from the sun..
“Hey, why are you getting upset?” He asked in a calm voice, one much more pleasing than what he spat out moments ago.
“You’re being mean.” You tried to push his hands down but you weren’t strong enough.
“I wasn’t trying to be. I’m just tired.”
You shook your head. “I was mean to you and you have every right to dish it back out.. but I hate it.”
“Hey, I’m not being mean to you. I’m sorry if it sounded that way.”
Harry didn’t care where you were at, he wanted to comfort you. His hand moved to press against your jaw and you let out a sad whimper. He felt a wave of guilt flood his body. Maybe he spoke with a tone he didn’t realize he had used..
“Peach, don’t cry. I promise I’m not mad at you or being mean, okay? You can be mean to me all you want. But I’ll never be mean to you, baby.”
You whined, frustration building up. “Don’t say that, Harry.. someone could hear you.”
“There’s nobody around us. Relax.”
“I don’t want people to know right now.”
He put his other hand in the small of your back, guiding you closer to him. “I know, I know.”
“Then stop.. being this way right now.” You scratched at his wrist but he still didn’t move his hand.
“I’ll stop if you tell me you understand that I wasn’t trying to be mean to you.” His eyes were pleading with you.
As much as you thought he was being that way, you knew he would never intentionally do anything like that. You could treat him like the worst human on the planet and he’d still worship the ground you walked on - even before he ever kissed you..
“I know, Harry.”
“Promise?”
“Yes.” You nodded, and sighed in relief as his hands left your body and he took a step back.
“Thank you for offering to take care of me, peach.” He said with a smile that made your heart skip a beat. “But I’m okay right now.”
“Just don’t want you to be hurting.”
He chuckled and licked his lips. “I know. You’re too sweet, hm?”
“Shh.”
“Sorry, sorry.” He knew none of your friends were around, but he opted to make you happy.
“I should’ve stayed at home.” Your words made him furrow his brows and slightly frown.
“What happened earlier, hm?”
You groaned and bolted your eyes shut. It felt like steam was rolling from your ears and you were about to explode. Harry could tell that whatever occurred had really made you upset.
“Stephanie said something stupid.”
“Stupid?” He lifted a brow, not believing that was the whole story.
“Yes. Stupid and it pissed me off.”
Usually you were very vocal and stood your ground when someone said something you didn’t like, even if it was one of your friends. But Harry didn’t notice any kind of confrontation earlier. Was it not stupid enough to warrant a verbal protest from you?
“What did she say?”
“It was.. just something rude.”
He lifted his brows as your eyes found his again. “About you?”
He knew that you and Stephanie were close, so the thought of her saying anything mean towards you or about you was hard for him to imagine. You let out a deep sigh and shook your head.
“No.. about you.”
He chuckled, sort of shocked. “Me?”
Harry expected you to give him a short answer, maybe even avoid saying what was actually said. But you surprised him again by rambling out the situation to him. He listened and watched your expressions switch from annoyance to anger to disbelief..
“Just.. she just said she thought you were attractive and she asked me if I thought you were cute.” You rolled your eyes and clenched your jaw for a second. “I kept telling her that I don’t see my friends that way. Then, she kept going. She said something about.. being surprised that you were single and maybe it was because you were bad in bed, or maybe too good, and I kept cringing and telling her it was weird to think about that.”
Harry licked his lips and slowly exhaled as the story unfolded before him. He noticed how irritated you were, how red your face had turned and how hard you were tapping your foot on the concrete. It was sort of amusing to him, but he refrained from laughing. You were being serious, and he didn’t want to make you think you were over reacting.
You turned away from him and threw your hands in the air, your attention was now on your own thoughts as they fell from your mouth.
“What kind of person says that about their friend? I mean, it’s nobody’s business what any of us do or don’t do or whatever, it’s so stupid. She really, really pissed me off.”
“I-“
You cut him off, not even realizing he was trying to speak. “This is why I don’t want to tell anyone about this shit because they’re so judgmental. Just because she thinks you’re cute doesn’t give her the right to say creepy things about you. And then have the nerve to ask me what I thought.”
Harry reached for your hand as your arm fell down, but you moved too quickly for him. You were facing him again, that same irritated pout on your face. He figured since you were quiet now, he’d take the opportunity to speak.
“You’re just a little jealous.” He grinned.
“Harry.” You huffed, not pleased with his amused expression.
“You’ve always been a bit jealous when it comes to me, yeah? Even before.. everything happened. And I’m the same with you.. it’s okay.”
Even though you knew he was right, you didn’t want to hear him say it out loud.
“I.. I’m not jealous.”
He scoffed and shook his head. “Yes you are.. and I would be if one of the guys said that about you.”
You groaned and balled your hands into tight fists. “I almost.. exploded. I wanted to tell her to shut the fuck up.”
He chuckled back. “Well I’m glad you didn’t, peach.”
Telling him how you felt sort of made the frustration fade away. You were still annoyed and rubbed the wrong way by the things that were said, but other thoughts were taking over. What if you didn’t control yourself earlier and you lashed out? Would Stephanie think you were just taking up for Harry and calling out her rude behavior or would she read into it more? Would she suspect you had feelings for him? The anxiety was building up immensely.
A sigh slipped from your mouth as your eyes fell to the ground. “This is.. hard, Harry.”
He wanted to wrap his arms around you and assure you everything was fine, but he was respecting your wishes of not showing affection publicly. So, he just gave you a gentle smile instead and kept his voice low.
“I know.. just remember that you’re the one in control.. Whoever you want to tell, whenever you want to tell them.. it doesn’t matter to me.”
You shook your head. “No, I’m not telling anyone right now. I’m not ready.”
“I know, and that’s fine.”
You figured it was time to return to the court. “She better not ever say anything like that to me again.”
Harry laughed louder this time. “You’re cute when you’re jealous.”
He laughed even more as you rolled your eyes and walked past him, ignoring his comment. He followed you back to the court, a smile stuck on his lips as he thought about your jealousy. It was sort of attractive in an odd way. The thought of you being protective over him was intriguing. No matter what though, he knew that if he were in your shoes.. he would’ve been just as jealous.
.
[a/n: sorry I’ve been away for a while.. had a lot of personal things happen back to back that wrecked me.. anyway, here’s a little update :) I know it’s not very long or filled with smut but pls remember this is a series that will have multiple part that aren’t smut. thanks for coming back for this one! More to come soon ❤️]
taglist: @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @victoriasigaard @ariiscringe @harlowsgirl @lomllover @haniaaa04 @sideboobrry11 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @fangirl509east @fruity-harry @storyschanging @tpwk-kiley
#harry styles#harry#harry styles smut#harry styles x reader#one direction#harry styles blurbs#harry styles stuff#harry styles fanfiction#harry smut#best friends to lovers#Harry styles friends to lovers#harry styles series#harry styles one shots#angst#fluff#smut#harry styles fic
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pairings: best friend!Harry x fem!reader
summary: Y/N's having a bad day and who better to help than her best friend
word count: 2.2k
authors note: hi hello!! here’s something that’s been sitting in my drafts for a whileeeee while i work on chapter three! :) hope you enjoy!!
TW: for a mention of self harm but the only thing she does is pinch her arms over and over again, please read with caution or don’t read if it triggers you or make you uncomfortable. i love you❤️
----
Y/N’s always been such a happy person, always there for all her friends, always having a smile on her face and making sure her friends are okay. She’s always been that one friend that no matter what time it is, she’ll always be there to lend a listening ear and provide the needed solace.
She’s always been that friend that’ll give the ones she cares about the last of her anything, always willing to give the last of her money to help a friend in need, willing to give the clothes off her back if it was necessary. She’s just a giver by nature. She’s always been the friend to go to whenever you need advice, always taking care of her friends, giving them whatever’s needed.
Because she’s grown to be able to mask her emotions, it’s hard to tell whenever she’s not able to fully give as much, whenever she starts feeling down and gets in her head. No one notices as she starts becoming quieter, smaller, less.
She very rarely has bad days, her sunshine personality weeding its way through the dark clouds and allowing her to smile and laugh her way through the day. It’s easy to forget why her day was bad when she’s around friends, but it’s especially easy when she’s around him. Her best friend, her right hand man, her everything in a sense.
Her and Harry had become friends when she stumbled into him and spilled her tea all over his cream flared pants and she over-apologized until he laughed it off and rubbed her head gently. After that, they became inseparable, always attached at the hip. They were close, close enough to where whenever they were out by themselves they were constantly asked how long they’ve been together, they were constantly mistaken for a long term couple. At the question, they’d both blush softly and deny the question by laughing and shaking their heads as they smile and say they’re just friends.
They’ve always been just friends and neither have entertained the thought of becoming more, not seeing the point of appeasing everyone else as long as they were happy. He’s always noticing her, takes in the small details and keeps them all in a special folder in his brain and his heart.
He notices how she’ll sway lightly in her seat whenever she’s happy, he notices how her nose scrunches whenever she genuinely laughs, he notices how she never leaves without a hug and ‘I love you’, how she puts her hand over a sharp corner when her friend bends down to get something, how she makes sure to never split the pole and to always give a little snack to any cat or dog she sees on the street.
He also notices when she starts distancing herself in conversation, how her lip will quiver and her eyebrows furrow the tiniest bit when she’s upset but can’t sneak away, he notices that when she starts playing with her rings that means she’s in her head or she’s uncomfortable, he notices how her glossy eyes will lose the light in them whenever she’s having a bad day. He notices things that she doesn’t even notice in herself and he prides himself in knowing her so well.
She’s his complete other half, his soulmate, he can’t imagine his life without her and refuses to even think about that. He can just feel whenever her energy shifts ever so slightly and he’s always been there to help her.
But he knows that when she has the bad days she prefers to deal with it alone, she’ll start excusing herself from the friend group when she’s asked to hang out. Her most used excuse is she’s on her period and her cramps are just killing her, and he knows that’s when it’s bad, when her pain is at its worst and she can’t bother to attempt to mask.
Her body aches, she can feel the pain rooting itself deep in her bones, she’s tense as her muscles scream at her. Her bloodshot eyes sting painfully as fat and heavy tears stream down her pink cheeks, her lips chapped no matter how many times she licks them. She can feel her head pounding and throbbing from how long she’s been crying, her throat sore and tight as she hiccups.
Her arms are beginning to form a slight hue of red and she can feel bruises beginning to form as she pinches them quickly, trying to distract her mind from the intense feelings of her own emotions flooding through. The muscles in her stomach are tense and uncomfortable at the amount of heavy sobs and pants that flow through her body and out of her plump lips.
She can’t remember what triggered all of this, her brain too fuzzy to even remember if she grabbed her list to ground her. As she cries and screams into the empty space, she can feel her lungs expand as she breathes, she can feel the light touch of her loose tank top brush lightly against her skin, she can feel the loose strands of hair brushing against the back of her neck.
She feels as if she can’t breathe, it feels like her bedroom is caving in on her, the small room only seeming to grow smaller and smaller as her breath gets stronger and shaky. Her hand scrambles around her messy bed, searching for the list containing ways for her to calm down and a shaky sob racks through her body when she realizes she can’t find it.
She closes her eyes tightly as she brings her knees to her chest and wraps her arms around them, burying her face into her legs she can’t help as she shakes her head. She doesn’t know how long this has been going on, how long she’s trapped herself in her room, but she hopes it’ll be over soon.
She grabs her phone from her beside table and with shaky hands she unlocks it and clicks on her messages app. She quickly taps on the conversation she’s looking for and attempts to write out a message.
——
Sweet Girl: H, can u come over please
She doesn’t have to wait long for a response from him as her phone dings a couple seconds later.
Haz: Of course sweet girl. Do you need/want me to bring anything for you? Some food maybe?
Sweet: Girl: if u want, just want you rn
Haz: Ok bug. I’m gonna get us some food and then I’ll be over. See you soon x
Sweet Girl: kay, thanks H. love u
Haz: I love you sweet girl, just try to breathe for me, I won’t be too long and I’ll use my key so you don’t have to get up.
——-
As she tries to focus on her breathing, attempting to take slow and deep breaths, she wipes her face to clear away the tears on her cheeks. She sniffles and wraps her arms around her torso gently as she lies in her bed, the soft material and warmth from her cover enveloping her and makes her smile softly.
She’s only able to enjoy a couple moments of peace before another painful sobs rack through her body. She sobs into her pillow, the pain searing through her body as the tears stain her cheeks.
She hates this, she hates not knowing why she’s so upset, she hates everything to do with her bad days. She wishes she was able to ask for the help she needs but she’s so much of a people pleaser, she can’t bear the thought of not being there for her friends when they need her.
A soft knock at her bedroom door jolts her gently from her thoughts. She quickly tries to wipe her face from any tears and snot streaks before telling the person to come on. Her door squeaks softly as it opens and his face appears in the small space.
As he walks into her small bedroom, he smiles sadly at her in which she returns the favor. Her eyes light up just a bit when she spots the brown takeout bag with her favorite Mexican restaurant logo printed onto the cheap plastic. He leans down and kisses her forehead before sitting down on her bed gently and placing the bag next to him.
“Hi” she whispers and he smiles
“Hi, feelin’ any better?” He says and she nods
“Not really, thank you for uh coming over” she says as she leans her head on his shoulder.
He hums softly as he wraps one arm around her shoulder and squeezes once.
“Y’know m’always gonna come. You don’t have to thank me. Wanna talk about it?” He asks gently and she shakes her head lightly.
“Not much to talk about, dunno why it happens. I just get really sad out of nowhere.” She closes her eyes gently as she relaxes into his hold.
He nods in response and they sit in silence for a couple minutes before he reaches over to the bag and holds it out to her.
“Here, you should eat it before it gets cold.” She smiles in response as he nudges her hand with the bag. She thanks him quietly as she grabs the bag from him, smiling bashfully she begins to open the bag and the styrofoam box inside.
As she eats in silence, she’s not able to eat as much as she normally would. She takes a couple decent sized bites before she begins to move the food around.
“M’gonna put this in the fridge, I’ll be back.” He says quietly as he makes a way to grab the box, she sighs softly before looking at him.
“Sorry..” he shakes his head in return.
“Don’t be sorry lovie. M’proud of you for eating as much as you did.” He says before walking out and setting the box in the fridge before walking back to her room.
As he comes back into her room, he hums a soft song as he makes his way to her bed and wraps his arms around her, squeezing tightly. He kisses the top of her head before whispering into her ear.
“M’so sorry you’re feelin’ like this lovie. But you’re not alone okay? You have so many people who care for you and love you.” He can hear her sniffle softly and be squeezes her once.
“Not your fault Haz. I know I’m not alone but I don’t wanna burden anyone.” She says and he shakes his head.
“You’re never gonna be a burden. We want you to be happy, be okay, we want you to not have to suffer alone. All of us worry about you, it’s okay to ask for help, angel. We’re not gonna judge you.” Her quiet tears slowly become louder as he speaks, she shakes her head and he rubs her back.
“It’s okay not to be okay. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be in pain. It’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to accept the love you give out, angel. You give and give and give to everyone else, and I know you don’t give yourself the love and energy you deserve.. let us love you how you love us, let us help you. Let us care for you. We’re not gonna judge you sweet girl.” He says and she grabs his t-shirt tightly before sobbing into his chest.
She can feel the tears streaming down her cheeks and wetting his shirt as she cries into him. She can’t find it to be embarrassed at how loud she’s being and how she looks, not with his hand rubbing small circles on her back and how his words have sparked a sense of warmth in her stomach. She can feel it fluttering throughout her body while he whispers all these soft and sweet words in her ear.
She can’t remember how long she’s been crying, and she goes to move away from him and he stops her.
“Y’okay now? You don’t have to move if you’re not ready yet.” She nods before scooting closer to him, their thighs mashed together and her head resting on his shoulder as he rubs her shoulders softly.
They stay like that, sitting in the comfortable silence for a while before she yawns softly and catches his attention.
“Y’tired?” He asks and she nods
“Sorry you spent your day with a crying mess.” She says with a sad chuckle.
“You’re my best friend Y/N. I’d gladly spend however long with you no matter if you’re sad or happy. As long as you’re okay, I’m happy. Want me to stay with you tonight?” He asks and she shakes her head.
“Uh uh, go have fun with your other friends. I think I’m okay now. Thank you for everything H.” She says as she squeezes him softly before moving to the head of her bed and getting under the covers.
“Text or call me if y’need anything angel. I mean it.” He says and goes to tuck her in, resulting is a soft giggle to breeze past her lips.
“Okay, dad. I love you.” She says a smile playing on her lips as he leans forward and kisses her forehead.
“I love you sweet girl. Sleep well and have sweet dreams.”
#harry styles#harry styles imagine#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x reader#harry styles fic#harry edward styles#harry styles one shot#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fan fic#harrystyles#harry styles one direction#harry#harry styles fluff#best friend!harry#harry styles x fem!reader#harry styles x y/n#harry x reader#harry fanfic
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focus*
warnings: smut, spitting, choking, squirting, throat fucking, dumbification, dirty talk, degradation, slight daddy kink, facial(ish)
pairing: dad’s best friend harry x reader
summary: in which yn keeps eyeing harry’s arms and he puts them to good use
masterlist | taglist
~
yn’s bottom lip is tucked between her teeth as she sits on the couch next to harry, trying to keep her dirty thoughts at bay. but it’s so hard when he’s sat beside her, shirtless at that, as he types away on his computer, sending angry emails to his employees. yes it’s his day off, but it just seems that there is always something that comes up when he finally relaxes.
it’s not the emails that are turning her on, not at all. it’s the fact that with each message he types with annoyed grunts and mumbles falling from his lips, she can see his biceps just flexing with each movement. she can’t even focus on her phone that’s playing some sort of video on its screen because her eyes just keep flitting over to where he sits.
her thighs are practically sewn together as her mind races, from thoughts of those biceps next to her head as he pounds deep into her in missionary, to them wrapped around her neck.
oh.
that second thought is something she should’ve thought of a long time ago. she should’ve thought of him bending her over the kitchen table with his arm wrapped around her neck, her feet barely touching the floor as he wrecks her. that thought forces a moan from her lips before she can stop it, causing harry to stop in his tracks and turn to look at her.
his first thought is that she’s hurt somehow sitting next to him, and so he takes a moment to let his eyes trail over her body. one clean sweep and then he’s meeting her eyes with raised eyebrows as he recognizes that body language. the glued thighs, the blown pupils, and not to mention the swollen lips from all the chewing. she’s been caught.
closing his laptop, he places it on the coffee table before angling his body to be able to maintain eye contact comfortably. the silence is deafening, and she wants to crawl into a hole. “are you going to tell me what that was about or do i need to force it out of you?” he’s playing no games. she just stares at him in silence as she debates whether or not she should tell him. “and tell the truth. i don’t have room in my day for lies and wasted time,” he makes sure to tell her.
she chooses her words carefully. “your arms,” she murmurs, avoiding eye contact with him and looking down to her lap. he huffs in annoyance before forcefully grabbing her jaw and making her look at him.
“what about them? don’t be stupid, i don’t have the time for the games,” he warns her before he’s letting her go and awaiting her answer.
“i was thinking about them…,” she pauses, forcing herself to say the words. “i was thinking about them wrapped around my neck when we’re in bed,” she finally finishes. the term ‘in bed’ would’ve been innocent in any other context, but he knows exactly what she means. she means she wants his arms around her neck while he fucks her.
she hears harry’s breath hitch before the room falls into silence, the lack of sound making her regret her decision to be honest with him. she could just about cry when he stands up from the couch, looking down at her lap. a few seconds later, she hears the sound of fabric hitting the floor, and from her peripheral vision she can see the shorts harry was wearing there. trailing her eyes up his legs, her eyes nearly bulge out of her head when she sees harry just stood there with his cock in his hand, hard and already leaking.
“get on your fucking knees,” his words are firm and leave no room for argument and she’s immediately scrambling off the couch and onto her knees in front of him. resting her weight on her heels, she sits there and looks up at him as she patiently awaits further instruction.
“open your mouth,” he demands, and she instantly does so, her mouth already practically salivating at the thought of him. harry just stroked himself a couple times before grabbing the back of her head and forcing her open mouth onto his cock. he immediately sets a brutal pace and begins fucking her throat with no care of the mess she’s making of them with her saliva. he continues for a minute or so, keeping a close eye on her to make sure she’s okay. with each passing second, he sees her move further and further away, until her eyes start to roll back into her head.
“fuck. that’s it, i see. all it took was my cock down your throat and now you can’t even focus. dumb little baby can’t even hold her head up, poor thing,” he firmly slaps her cheek to get her to keep her eyes on him and it works, but only for a moment, before her head is lulling right back onto his thick thigh. over the sounds of her choking on him, harry just sighs in irritation before quickly pulling his cock from her mouth and ignoring her whine of protest.
he’s then quickly grabbing her by her arms and pulling her up before pulling her sleep shorts down and off her body before pushing her onto the couch, pressing her face into the cushions. climbing up onto the couch behind her, he takes a moment to admire her and how wet she already is, her folds glistening with her arousal. he wants a closer look, though, taking his hands and spreading her ass cheeks even wider and looking at her already throbbing hole.
he can’t resist leaning down to swipe his tongue through her sodden folds, suckling on her clit for a moment before pulling away when she starts to grind against his face. she whines in frustration as he just watches her throb a bit, and then he’s letting her ass go before straightening up and taking his cock in his fist once more. crawling forward just a bit, he lines himself up with her and runs his leaking tip through her folds just to tease her a bit more before gathering some spit in his mouth and letting it land on her pussy, trailing down.
when he’s satisfied with the sight, he begins pressing himself into her hole as slowly as possible, listening to her mewls of pleasure as he stretches her tight hole. as soon as he’s deeply seated within her, he lets her adjust for a few seconds before pulling out until his tip is resting at her entrance and pushing back in just as deep as before. “is this what you wanted? for me to stop my work and fuck you like a whore? do you like daddy’s arm around your neck?” he grunts, letting her wails of pleasure as well as the sounds of their skin slapping spur him on.
she can only yell out a chorus of broken agreements, her nails clawing at the leather couch cushions and tears beginning to fall from her eyes at the pleasure. he’s fucking her at what seems like an unfathomable speed to her, each drag of his thick cock along her walls pushing her closer and closer to the edge. she can’t even give him a warning due to her wordless babbles, but he understands.
he doesn’t only understand, he decides to make it even better. stopping for just a moment, he ignores the sound of annoyance that comes from her and sits up to rest on his heels before pulling her up as well. wrapping his arm back around her throat, he begins to fuck into her from below before reaching around her body with his free hand and honing in on her clit.
she hadn’t thought it could get any better, but as soon as he started fucking her so deeply in tandem with the tight circles around her clit, she felt like she could explode. and that she did. after no more than ten seconds more of the intense pleasure she’s experiencing, her body tenses and a yell of relief falls from her lips as her orgasm takes over. as it wracks her body, though, harry switches from just a few fingers on her clit to his whole hand, rubbing the sensitive bud quickly. that sends her into a whole other realm, and she feels her body relax before she can register what’s going on and then they both hear and feel her orgasm drench the leather cushions below them.
this whole time, harry has not stopped fucking her, and soon her head is lulling to the side as she lets him take her even more. “fuck, i’m close,” he chokes, still feeling the aftermath of her orgasm as she flutters around him, milking him for all he’s worth. “where do you want it?” he manages to ask, staving off his orgasm just long enough for her answer. his question basically brings her back to life and she’s pushing her self up on her hands as she answers.
“please, want it in my mouth,” she whines, and he’s immediately pulling his throbbing cock from her and standing up beside the couch before forcing her onto her knees.
“open,” he breathes, chest heaving as he looks down at her. she immediately obliges, sticking her tongue out of her mouth and tipping her head back just slightly, and then harry is quickly jerking his cock in front of her face. “don’t you dare fucking move, fucking shit!” he gasps as his orgasm finally takes over, nearly knocking the wind out of his chest from the intensity. warm spurts shoot from his tip and onto her awaiting tongue and he’s just groaning above her as he empties himself for her.
she takes everything he has to offer, watching his biceps and abs contract as he keeps stroking himself a over her. by the time he’s finished, he’d tongue is coated and some of his cum is even dribbling down her chin. reaching forward, he grabs her neck and keeps her still before gathering some of his saliva and spitting right into her open mouth, humming in satisfaction when she keeps it there without him having to tell her. he lets go and just watches her for a moment, loving to see her struggle to keep her tongue out. “swallow,” he commands and she’s instantly closing her mouth and letting the mixture of cum and spit go down her throat.
~
#harryistheonlyoneforme#harry styles fic rec#harry styles#harry styles fic#harry styles smut#harry styles filth#harry related writings#dbf harry styles#smut#dbf harry#dadsbestfriend harry#dadsbestfriend!h#dads best friend harry#dbfrry#new fic#new post
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I’M IN MY PRIME | Best friend's dad
age gap. 4.8K on patreon
Third and final part to LIQUID SMOOTH & COME TOUCH ME TOO
Fucking an older man feels like every ugly, broken part of you shuddering to the surface. Buoying, dredged up from his broad hand on your shoulder, lugging you down to meet his pelvis in a wet slap. It feels… Heavy. Overwhelming. Raw— your rim smarts on the sheer stretch, and every bludgeon into you (you, being yanked back to envelop the root of his cock, again, and again, and again) feels like it’s cudgeling something sharp and deep. Bruising something awful. And you like it. Chase it, the same way you’ve been chasing him. Because when he resorts to softer grinds, just as deep, and palms at the sides of your skull, thumbs prying into the soft flesh under your cheekbones, with his fingers interlocking in the gentle arch of your nape— And he holds you like that, by the back of your neck, by your face, all withered adoration, lust in worn fatigue, it feels like he’s piecing you back together. Like he can cup his hands around you and make you whole. Your lower lip quakes. “There you go,” Harry tells you, hardly over a whisper (a rasp in ironclad passion), like he’s breaking with every rut, like this moment— fragile, flimsy— will break apart in his hands if he speaks any louder, “There you fucking go. Take it, baby. Just like that.”
preview
You don’t ask him about nice boys. What he meant about nice boys, and what it means for him now. Now, that you’re naked, and bare, and sweaty, stretched across his chest, tracing ink and freckles with your fingertip like coasting the shape of a foreboding asterism.
Those constellations, spelled out in the horoscopes, on a webpage that was laid out like it was scraped straight off the wayback machine from the windows 2000 era, made your brain rot for years. Cheap, flimsy justification in the shade of cobalt blue and the distant sister of comic sans. You always reverted to the same page because it told you the pretty things you needed to hear, or rather, gave you enough space to pick out what you wanted to see; digging diamonds out of kimberlites. Because the brecciated rock was the bigger picture, maybe— mundane, aversive, your eyes listed, gnawing into the core— but if you picked in enough—
It doesn’t matter anymore. Not with his heartbeat humming in your ear like a perfect iambic pentameter. An unspoken love sonnet.
(Your naked leg slotted over his bare thigh tells you as much.)
He laughs when you roll your hip forward and grind your wet cunt into the smattering of hair there. Your slick coagulates against his thigh. He feels it, and gives you this low, airbrushed sound in the hummingbird angel choir rippling across the little, vibrating bones in your ear. You hear it under his soft chest before you hear it from his mouth. Then, he tells you something about his knees not being what they used to be.
Don’t start. Don’t start again—
You feel like you’ve got your fingers on a winding key. You’re playing with cinders. Rolling live coal in your palms, but you’re waiting for the firework of the blaze reigniting. Waiting for the gear to click. That’s what love is, isn’t it? Push and pull.
(You wonder if he’ll break. If the flame will swallow you whole, if you’ll hump his leg like a pitiful dog long enough, and he’ll lug you over his lap to bounce you dumb all over on his fat cock again. You wonder if he’ll give in when your knees start to ache.)
Undying devotion doesn’t get crushed under a maelstrom, never mind under a coasting cumulonimbus. You rock your hips a little, more into him, against him, so he knows you don’t care about his knees, or what they used to be, so he doesn’t think that you regret the disconnect in timelines; that yours didn’t overlap with his, enough, to indulge in what his knees used to be.
(You think you’re getting somewhere when he shifts his thigh against you, rigid musculature, granting you access to a better ride. And you wonder if, instead, he’ll mistake your placation for misbehavior. The thought knocks something ugly and wanting up from the settled sediment of your hunger.)
#harry styles#harry styles smut#harry styles writing#harry styles one shot#harry styles x reader#harry styles x you#harry styles x y/n#harry styles fanfiction#dom harry styles#harry styles dirty one shot#older!harry#best friend's dad#age gap!harry#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfic#patreon teaser
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One more to love
(Famous!reader x Husband!harry )
Synopsis- You decide to surprise your husband for Valentine's Day. Harry's on Tour in Canada, not expecting you at all. You get back home after a few fun filled days with him and only when you fall sick does a doubt arise in your head. Can love making on the day of love lead to a baby?
This can be treated as part 2 to this, or you can read it as a stand alone.
Word count:6.7K
Warnings: Smut, some really sweet intimacy, praising. Lots of fluff, Harry being the sweetest husband, mentions of performance anxiety, pregnancy. Oh and watch out for best friend! Niall
_____________________________________________________
You leaned over the mirror as you swiped red lipstick over your lips. You reserve wearing red lips for special occasions. It was safe to say that today was one. You were in Toronto, to surprise your husband for Valentine’s Day! He was on tour, and you were busy with a few song recordings so neither of you could see each other in the last two months.
"Do I look okay?", you asked your friend Kiara, as you smack your lips together, before stepping away from the mirror.
"Hell, you look amazing.", Kiara said. You were wearing a sheer black top, ripped blue jeans and boots. You let your hair down in waves, and you were pretty satisfied with your look.
"He's going to get hard from just looking at you.", she said, making you laugh. “You sure you can’t come along?”
Kiara, one of your best friends is a model. You had flown out to Toronto with her from London. She had some work here for the next few days.
“Wish I could, but gotta go babe.”, Kiara pulls you into a hug. “Have fun with your man, eh?”
“Oh I will.”, you grin at the thought of seeing Harry. “I’ll see you soon Ki, thanks for helping me get ready.”
“Of course. See ya!”
You were now alone in the hotel room, your car was going to be here soon, that’ll take you to the venue Harry’s performing at. While you were putting on your heels, you got a call from another one of your best friend’s.
"Hello Nialler!”, you answer. If it wasn’t for Niall, you’d be a complete mess whenever you felt sad and alone about Harry being on tour. Even though Niall always annoyed the crap out of you, you know you’re lucky to have him as your close friend. You can count on him.
"Can yeh explain why there is a huge bunch of roses, chocolates and a big teddy bear on yeh doorstep?", Niall asks, making your face light up.
“Aw! That must be Harry. He might have had it shipped.”
“Yeh, looks like. I forgot it’s Valentine’s Day.”
“Wait, why are you at my house? You breaking in when I’m not around?”, you gasped.
“Not sure if it’s breaking in if the owner gave me the keys.”, Niall snorts. “And I’m just dropping by to search for my favorite hoodie I think I left here.”
“Can you please move all the things Harry sent safely into the house for me?”
“What if it’s not Harry? What if it’s your secret admirer?”, Niall gasps, and you laugh, shaking your head. “Oh, wait! There’s a card. Yes, it’s Harold, alright.”
“Of course it is. What does the card say?”
“You can see for yourself when you’re back.”, Niall says, and you hear noises of him moving things. “I’m gonna leave everything here except the chocolates. They look good, y/n.”
“No! Harry got them for me!”
After you convinced Niall to leave your chocolates alone, and he found his hoodie, he was locking your house and rushing to work. Your car was here to take you to the venue, and you took your bag having things you got for Harry, before getting in. Jeff greeted you backstage and unfortunately for you, the show started a little bit earlier than the scheduled time so your man was already on stage.
Never mind, you could wait until the show was over.
Your heart did a leap as you finally saw your husband. He wore a pink suit, hair perfectly done, and the crowd screamed as he moved around on stage. You loved watching Harry perform. He was in his element.
Something was thrown to him onstage and he caught it. He got to know that it was a bra only when he looked at it and he shrieked, throwing it away.
"Excuse me?", Harry said into the mic. "No throwing me bras, you know why?"
"WHY?”
"Because I'm a happily married man!", he did a dramatic hair flip and showed the crowd his hand bearing the wedding ring, making you giddy. That was your man right there. "The only bra I'd like to catch is my wife's and my wife's only!"
You blushed.
You hid when the team came off stage.
“Good show, guys, well done.”, Harry says as he makes sure to hug all his team members.
"Wait, Harry, we have a surprise for you.", Claire said.
Harry turns to look at her, smiling already. He loves surprises. "I do?"
"Yes.", she said. "Would you kindly close your eyes?"
"Why?"
"Mitch, please do the honors."
Mitch closed Harry’s eyes with his palms. “What the hell?”
Mitch just laughed in reply. You came out of your hiding place, and the people on his team who didn’t know that you were here gasped, some of them clapped waiting for Harry’s reaction.
"What? Is it the President?", Harry joked.
As he stood there clueless, Mitch pulled away and you wrapped your arms around him. You were so happy to be in his arms again. You squeezed his waist, pressing your head against his chest. Harry quickly wrapped his arms around you when he realized it’s you. Only you could fit like a perfect little puzzle in his arms.
Harry hugged you tighter and kissed the top of your head. "y/n?”, he whispers.
"Happy Valentine's day baby!", you smiled at him and pulled away. Then you got down on one knee and pulled out a rose bouquet from behind your back offering it to him. His hands flew to his mouth in shock.
"F-For me?", Harry squeaked looking at the beautiful flowers. You beamed and nodded. Other guys might not like flowers so much, but Harry does, and you know it.
"T-thank y-you.", Harry stuttered and took them. He remained speechless with shock for a while and you let him take his time. You were still on one knee so he shifted the flowers to one hand and held your hand with the other, pulling you up.
"H-Hi.", Harry blurted out and you giggled, kissing his cheek.
"Hey."
"Are you r-real?"
You laughed and stood on your tiptoes, closing your eyes before pressing your lips to his. Harry closed his eyes too, pulling you closer by your waist, feeling himself getting lost as the kiss deepened. As much as you wanted to keep kissing him, you were around others, so you pulled away slowly. “Does it seem real now?”
"Too much PDA!", Mitch complained, covering his eyes.
"Deal with it buddy!", you said.
Harry looked from her to Mitch. "Did you know?", he asked Mitch.
"We all did.", he said motioning to the rest of his crew.
"See babe, Kiara had the fashion week here, so I flew with her to surprise you. I told these guys and made them promise not to tell you. I'm sorry for not answering your calls today, now you know why. Did you get surprised?", you explained, still in his arms.
"I-I yeah!", Harry said and you giggled and hugged his neck.
"Oh H, you look like a tomato.", Sarah said. Harry shot her a glare.
"Cute though.", you kissed his nose. "I love you.", Harry whispered. He cupped your cheeks and stroked his thumbs on them, taking in every part of you, a smile tugging at his lips. His eyes fixed on your plump red lips, his favorite lipstick on you. “God, I fucking love you. You look incredible, love."
“Thank you, so do you! And, I love you too.”
Harry grinned. “Thank you so much for coming, this is the best Valentine’s day present ever. You! I’m so happy. Did you watch me perform!?”
“Of course I did! You were great!”
"Thanks! How long are you gonna be with me?"
"Um, four days. I go back to London Saturday morning.", you said softly, and his face fell.
"I-Including today?"
You shook your head. "From tomorrow."
You know Harry still wished he had you for some more time.
"Babe, it's okay, we'll make the best out of what we have.", you said. "And soon you're going to be on the UK leg, so we can see each other more, cheer up now.", you said, poking his cheeks with your index fingers and he smiled, nodding.
“I’m so glad you’re here, I was going crazy without you.", he said, nuzzling his head into your neck. You ran your hand through his hair and smiled in content. "Me too, I will fly over anytime for you." Harry kissed your neck.
"These are beautiful. Wait, so you didn't get the ones I sent you?", Harry asked about the flowers.
"Sorry no, but Niall’s got it all safe in the house..", she said. "Aw, here, we'll share.", he said and took a single rose out and gave it to you. You chuckled. "Thanks babe."
"Give me a few minutes to freshen up and we can get out of here.", Harry said, already shrugging off the suit. You went to talk to the crew while Harry was gone. He got back in record time.
"Let's go?"
"Yep." He kissed your cheek, as he took your hand in his. "How can someone be so pretty?", he wonders, making you blush. "Stop it, babe."
He laughs, nudging his nose against your cheek. "What do you wanna do tonight?"
"Whatever you want."
"No, your choice."
"I'm fine with anything."
"I am too."
"Harryyy.”
He laughed as you walked. “We could go out for dinner at some fancy place. Or we can go to the hotel room, just me and you there." Harry was leaning to the second option but he still wanted you to pick. He was already having a hard time keeping his hands to himself.
“Let’s go to the hotel room, I like me and you time.”, you winked.
So you made it to his hotel room, and while your luggage was being brought in, Harry kept the roses you gave him safely in a vase. Then he closed the door and tugged you into his arms, lips attacking yours again. You jumped a little so you could wrap your legs around his waist, and he hums in pleasure as one of his hands grips the back of your neck, and the other around your hip, keeping you steady. He bites your bottom lip, and you open your mouth, letting his tongue explore your mouth.
“I missed you so much.”, you breathe when he pulls away for a second.
“I missed you more, kitten.", Harry moves his lips to your neck, making you moan softly as you arched your neck back. You loved that nickname he had for you. “What did you miss about me?”, he asks.
“Oh everything.”, your hands play with the curls at the nape of his neck. “Everything about you, Harry.”
“Yeah? Did you miss my cock?”, Harry asks, taking your top off with one hand. He tossed off your bra in seconds, groaning as he squeezed your breast in his hand. You moaned at the feeling, you missed being touched by him. “S-So much.”
You could feel his dick getting hard, it was pressing against his stomach and your clothed center. “You miss my pussy?”, you ask him.
“Bloody hell, I’ve been dreaming about it every fucking day.”, Harry mumbles as he takes you to bed, lips leaving marks down your neck. “You gonna let me fuck your pretty little pussy today? As a Valentine’s day gift for me?”
“I don’t know, should I? You left me all alone to go on tour.”, you pout, gasping softly as you land on the bed, and Harry slides out of his pants before crawling over you.
“I know, I’m sorry, my heart.”, Harry mumbles, sliding his hands to your hips. “I’ll make it up to you, yeah? Make you feel so good.”
“I’d love that.”, you smile, and moan as his lips wrap around your nipple. You move your hand to feel his crotch, making him groan. “Get it all off, let me see you.”, you whisper. Harry listens, letting your nipple out of his mouth with a ‘pop’ and quickly pulling off his shirt and his boxers. You slide down your jeans, while your eyes roam over his body. His broad tattooed chest was heaving up and down and his sculpted abs made you want to run your hand over them. Your hand dips lower to his dick, which was hard and standing up straight.
“See what you do to me, kitten?”, Harry asks, fingers looping around the waistband of your panties. He moans as you stroke his dick. “I need to be inside you.”
“Yes, fill me up, babe.”, you lift your hips so he can slide your panties down your legs. “Let me see that pussy, been waiting for so long.”, he pushes your thighs apart and groans at the sight of your pussy. It was glistening, dripping down with your arousal.
“Never seen a pussy this pretty.”, Harry collects the arousal, bringing it to his lips. “Oh. You taste so sweet, baby.”
You moan as he dips his fingers inside you. “I think your little hole has gotten tighter, sweetheart. Didn’t have my dick in it for two months, hm? Poor baby.”
“P-Please Harry.” You needed to feel full.
“Gonna give you what you need, love. Always take care of you.” Harry circles his thumb over your clit, making you arch your back and let out another moan. “Did it feel good when you touched yourself, baby?”
“Y-Yes, but not as good as when you do it.” Harry smiles, capturing your lips in a kiss. “Don’t worry baby, I’m here to take care of you now.”
Harry slips his dick inside your pussy, and you throw your head back on the pillow, moaning. He slowly pushed his dick inside, and you realized just how much you missed having him inside you. Phone sex does the job for both your needs, but the intimacy, the closeness that you get when you’re together, phone sex doesn’t give you that.
“Oh fuck..it feels so good.”, Harry moans, hovering over you. He was letting you adjust since it has been a while. You pull him down closer, hands going to his back. “Y-You can move, babe.”
Harry thrusts his hips, and the rooms fill with sounds of pleasure. No other man has ever made you feel so good. You didn’t even know sex could feel so amazing, until you met Harry.
“Fuck you’re so perfect.”, Harry squeezes your boobs. “You’re all mine, aren’t you?”
“Y-Yes, yes, all yours, fuck, right there....” His dick moved in and out of you at a steady pace, hitting all the right spots. He knew your body like the back of his hand. He knew exactly what you needed. You saw pure love and adoration in his eyes when you looked at him, and you brought your hand to the side of the bed, opening your palm. Harry grabs your hand, letting you hold it.
“Shit, are you c-close babe?”, Harry asks, quickening his pace, making you curl your toes. “Oh yeah, yeah I’m gonna cum..”
“Cum around me, kitten, all over my dick.”, Harry presses kisses to your shoulder. You reach your high soon, and Harry kisses you through it. Harry couldn’t hold on any longer, he also cums right after you do.
“I love you.”, he breathes, collapsing on top of you. You smile, holding him close, running a hand through his curls. “I love you too.”
He brings your tangled hands up to kiss the back of your hand. “M’ so lucky you’re my wife, and proud.”
“Me too. Seeing all those girls going crazy for you today, and knowing that you’re gonna be in my arms later? No better feeling.”, you winked, and he laughs, pressing another kiss to your lips before lifting up on his hands and moving down on the bed, separating your legs again.
“I’m very hungry.”, he explains, looking away from your eyes and to your pussy. He hums, pushing some of his cum leaking out of you back inside with his fingers. “Gonna let me eat, kitten?”
______________________________________
“Those butter tarts were so good, I should have thrown some in my bag for later.”, you whisper to Harry as you walk back from the breakfast buffet, hand in hand. The plan was to go out sightseeing today, Harry said he could arrange a car.
Harry hums. “They were good. Think Canada’s famous for them.”
"Good morning!" Mitch and Adam popped out of nowhere, just as you were about to step into the elevator. "Where did you guys come from?", Harry chuckled. "Oh we were just-"
"Hanging around.", Adam completed.
Mitch nodded. "Hanging around."
"Great, morning, we gotta go.", Harry said and you nodded, waving to them. "Wait.", Mitch said. "Did you have a really nice night yesterday?"
"Yes.", you both said in chorus. He smirked and exchanged glances with Adam as they giggled. "I could hear you guys even with earphones.", Adam said and you blushed.
"Oh shut up.", Harry said, waving him off.
"No kidding, I was this close to banging on your door.", Mitch said, showing a little bit with his index and thumb fingers. "How was your night Mitch?", you ask back.
"Um, just like every other night, play video games after the show.", he mumbled.
"But yesterday was Valentine's Day.", you said.
"Uh huh so?"
"So, you’re just lonely cause you can't make a move on Sarah, how long are you going to keep saying you're friends?", you shoot back, making Harry and Adam burst out laughing. Mitch gave you a glare.
"Roasted.", Harry whispered to him and kissed your cheek, continuing to walk. "That is not true!", Mitch said.
"Yeah right.", Adam said sarcastically. "Come on mate, she's right, you had the perfect chance to take her out yesterday."
"He should learn from me.", Harry said, slipping his arm around your waist pulling you closer. "Ask the girl out before she goes away, cause she might just be the love of your life."
"Is it?", you tease. "Mhm. I love you."
You kissed him. "I love you too."
______________________________________________________________
“Ok, lets play a game…”, Harry started.
“You have to shoot these grapes into my mouth and every time you miss I get to dare you to do something in front of all these people."
“Ok but only if you play too.” Harry nodded. After some sightseeing, you wanted some place quiet and to be alone, so you found a place for a picnic, got a basket from one of the stores and sat by a lake. It was your kind of perfect.
“I'll go first.", Harry said while taking a grape. "Open wide." You moved a little away from him and opened your mouth wide.
Harry squinted his eyes aiming and shot it into your mouth. “WOO!” Harry exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air and doing a victory dance.
"Yeah whatever, my turn." He grinned and opened his mouth. You carefully aimed and threw it, but it hit the side of his lips instead of going in.
"Nooo."
"Yeah!! I dare you to…hmm… go ask that little boy for his number.” he said, pointing to a little boy.
“WHAT?! That's creepy, he's like 7 years old!", you said. "A dare's a dare kitten.", he smirked.
"Okay fine, watch me.", you ruffled his hair before getting up and walking to the boy who was playing football all alone.
"Hey buddy?" You wave at him. He looked up at you. "What?"
"I look at your shirt, it’s cool.”, you said and smiled. "Uh, thanks.", he mumbled in a Canadian accent.
"Hey can I get your number real quick?” You cringed at how that came out, but it was a dare.
He looked at you again, now checking you out. "Where are you from, pretty lady?"
You chuckled. "Um, London?"
"You can get my number on one condition."
"What?"
"You have to play soccer with me."
You smiled and nodded. "Sure, can we call my friend too?" You pointed at Harry giggling in the distance. "Of course."
"COME ON FRIEND, WE'RE PLAYING SOCCER!", you yelled. His eyes grew wide as soccer balls..
"FRIEND? YOU ARE MARRIED TO ME!", Harry marched up to you and you laughed. The boy took your hand and looked at the wedding ring.
"That is not cool, you want my number after being married?"
"It was a dare, you are not giving her your number.", Harry caught up. You pinch his arm. "Come on babe, he's a kid."
"What's your name?", you ask the boy. "Dan.", he said. "Is the offer still up for soccer?" He grinned and nodded. "Foot ball.", Harry muttered under his breath and you chuckled and kissed his cheek.
"What's your name tattoo man?", Dan asked Harry and he scoffed, as if the boy was some competition to him.
"I'm Harry."
He grinned and pulled you off to play with him.
"What is it with you and kids? You're like honey, and they're like bees.", Harry said as he tackled Dan with the football.
"I'm quite likable, you know...", you say as Dan passes the ball to you.
"We're going to get arrested if his mum finds us and thinks we're kidnappers."
___________________________________________________
"I have a show tomorrow.", Harry said slowly, leaving kisses down your neck. You were cuddling in his bed.
"Uh huh, and?”
"And, I can have special guests on my shows."
"Who do you have tomorrow?"
He looked up and gave you a look. "How did I end up with you?"
You grinned, tweaking his nose. "I give an awesome blowjob?"
He smiled and bit your nose. "True that. And I was talking about you, you dummy! You can sing a few songs with me if you’d like.”
"What-no.", you began shaking your head. "Harry there are more than twenty thousand people in your shows, not all of them like me."
"They love you, darling. You don't have to worry about the few who are just in their own imaginary world. I’d really love if I had my wife on stage singing with me.”
How could you say no to that face? Harry jutted out his bottom lip, making him look all cute. "Jeff will talk to Mel, I'm sure she'll agree.", he says. Mel was your manager. And before doing anything that might send the public into a frenzy, you had to talk to Mel.
"What if I freak out at the last minute?"
"That's normal."
"How's that normal?"
He chuckled and kissed your collarbone. "For you it is. You freak out before going onstage, then when you get in your zone, you're wonderful."
You smiled and pecked his lips. "You'll be there, promise? And will you protect me if your fans throw their heels at me?"
He giggled and kissed the tip of your nose. "I will darling, promise."
The last time you sang with Harry on stage was during One Direction’s last show. You had been their opening act. That’s how you started your music journey. Singing for the boys was like a dream come true. It was the best opportunity you got at that time, when you were just starting out. That’s also how you fell in love with the curly haired, dimpled lad.
_____________________________________________________
"Yeah but, I haven't sung in front of that many people in a long time, Ni.", you murmur as you talked to Niall on the phone while you got your makeup done. You had done rehearsals with Harry, and all was good, but you have a ritual of freaking out a little before going on stage.
"y/n, you'll do fine.", Niall said. "And Harry's onstage with you, so what's there to worry about?"
"Yeah, you're right. And um what do you do with your hands when you're not holding a guitar onstage?" You were not going to have a guitar around you like you do on your shows. Niall burst out laughing.
"I'm being serious!"
"You're so funny. What can I say about doing things with your hands? I think you'd better ask your husband that." You groaned. "Niaaaaall."
He laughed. "Stop over thinking, y/n, it’ll be fine..”
"Right, see you soon.”
"Yep. Love you, all the best, you don't need it but just in case his fans throw eggs at you?"
You gasped. "WILL THEY?"
"I was kidding! No, they won't."
"Hopefully. Love you too, bye Nialler."
“Bye love, tell Harold I said hi!”
You smiled and got up from the chair as the stylist handed you a beautiful dress. "This is cute!"
After you put it on, and got your hair done, you went backstage where the rest of the crew were.
Mitch let out a whistle as he saw you and Harry looked up who was fiddling with his ear piece. Harry's eyes widened and his lips spread into a smile.
"Do I look okay?", I asked him, who looked unbelievably good in that purple suite.
"Okay? You look beautiful!", Claire squeezed your shoulder. "Thanks, so do you.", you said back and she smiled and bowed. "Why thank you."
"You're stunning, darling.", Harry said. "That rhymed!", Mitch played a dramatic strum on his guitar.
You saw Sarah shaking her head and smiling at him from the corner of your eyes. "Thanks, you look amazing." You said, pecking Harry's lips. "Thank you.", he beamed.
"Will you be mad if I mess up?", you ask.
He chuckled and kissed your nose. "You won't mess up."
"I might, you know."
"Baby you won't, trust me, I know. And no, I won't be mad, I'm really happy that you agreed to sing on my show, it's the effort that counts."
"Yeah right, say that when I mess up."
He laughed and tugged you into a hug. "Famous young sensation or not, you haven't changed one bit, love."
"Famous young sensation?" You laughed.
"That's what the media calls you!", he said laughing too.
You smiled. "You love me the way I am, why would I change?"
He grinned. “Exactly, glad you know that. I love you, will you be okay?"
"I'll be okay."
"Don't go anywhere."
"I won't."
"See ya."
You kissed his lips and then his cheek. "I love you too, have fun."
"Will do." He grinned and kissed your forehead before he had to get going.
You did some vocal exercises in the meantime. You've dealt with some anxiety when it comes to shows, and Harry really helped you during your early days. He's helped you a lot, to get to who you are today.
You figured Harry prepared his set list for you, because it had all your favorite songs of his. You sang along with him from where you stood. He also sang If I could Fly, which he wrote for you during 1d days, and you got a bit teary eyed as he looked straight at you after the song.
Finally, it was time for you to be on stage.
"We have an extra song for you guys today." Screams just as he said that. "And a very special guest who has stolen my heart.”
You smiled.
"PLEASE WELCOME, MY WONDERFUL WIFE Y/N STYLES!"
YouI took a breath before walking to the stage and the crowd started roaring. You waved with your hand not holding the mic.
When you walked up to Harry, he smiled, hugging you gently and kissing your cheek. "SURPRISE?", he said to the crowd and you laughed as they shouted back 'Yes!'
"I thought so. She's here to sing one of her songs, also one of my favorites, with me!"
You said hi to the crowd, and nodded at Harry, telling him you were ready. The band started playing the music and you started singing. Harry took his ear pieces out wanting to hear you.
His face broke into a cute smile as he swayed and looked at you while you sang. Harry didn't join you for the first verse and chorus. He sang the second verse.
He looked at you while singing and you both eventually forgot the crowd and faced each other.
When you finished the song, Harry had a proud grin, like that’s my girl. You grinned back, wrapping your arms around his neck as you hugged him.
"I love you, y/n.", he whispered, kissing your hair. "I love you too, H.”
__________________________________________________
It was the day you were flying back to London. The last few days were so much fun and it went by so fast. Both of you were quiet that morning. You got some cuddles in, showered together, just enjoying each other’s presence before you had to part again. You were stuffing some of your last minute things into your bag with a sad frown on your face.
Harry was sitting on the bed, watching you. “Babe.”, he calls and you turn around to look at him.
“Come here.”, he pats his lap.
You happily sat on his lap and cuddled into his arms. Harry held you close, kissing the top of your head.
"So you'll come over and sing for free whenever I call you?"
"Hey, who said it was free? I need a hefty paycheck before I go.", you joked.
Harry laughs, kissing your cheek. "Think your manager has got it already."
"What? I was just joking, babe. I don't need to be paid for your show, you're my husband!"
"Yes, but you're also a gifted singer.", he squeezed your thigh. You press a kiss to his forehead. "All because of you. Thank you for everything you've done for me."
Harry shakes his head, smiling. "It's all you, love. Your hard work."
You played with the curls on the back of his head, as you remained quiet for a few minutes.
"Thanks for coming to see me even while having a busy schedule, love. It means a lot to me.”, he murmurs.
You kissed his neck. "Of course. We should do it again soon.”
Soon, it was time for you to go. Harry came with you to the airport, where you met with Kiara again.
"You shouldn't have come.", you tell Harry as you wait for the flight announcement.
"Why not? You didn’t want me to send you off?"
"Because I'll start crying in front of everyone."
He chuckled and squeezed your hand. "When has that ever stopped you before?"
"Not important.", your voice dropped a little. "Come with me?"
The bright green of his eyes faded. "You know I can't sweetheart, I would love to.". he said, putting his arm around you, and curling you to his side. You nodded, curling your fingers around his shirt.
"Hey,"he whispered, kissing your shoulder. "Don't be upset."
"I'm not.", you wiped under your nose.
"But don't lie either." You smiled a bit and kissed his forehead. "Maybe I am a bit."
He smiled back, brushing his fingertips along the skin peeking out of your top.
"If you need anything, seriously, anything, just call me. I don't care what time it is, or whatever. Even if it's just to talk, or take something off your chest, don't carry it around babe.", he said.
You nodded and ran a hand through his curls. "What are you going to do after reaching home?", he asks.
"Sleep and cry."
He chuckled. "Don't cry."
"You have no rights to say that after doing this to me."
He laughed again and pressed a kiss to your nose. "You’re so cute. I love you so much.”
______________________________________________
As soon as you got home, you saw the huge packages that Harry had sent you for Valentine’s Day. You began tearing it open. You saw a huge shiny red heart box. You opened it and out popped a teddy bear holding 'I love you'. You giggled and took it out. You set the box of your favorite chocolates aside to devour later. Then there was a super soft and fuzzy blanket which you rubbed against your cheek, instantly falling in love. Harry's the best. There was also a scented candle.
Then your eyes fall on the card Niall mentioned. The front is decorated with balloons and hearts. You knew Harry took the time to make it himself. You opened it.
Hi darling, good morning, good afternoon or good night. I'm not really sure when you'll get this, you know. Happy Valentine's Day!
So where do I start? I miss you, that's a good point to start. I miss you and I would do anything to be with you now but I am so sorry that I can't. I do want to cover you in kisses and hug you and never let you go. This is our first Valentine's Day after being married, and the third in total. This is supposed to be a day dedicated to your loved ones but I don't get it sometimes, my whole life is dedicated to you.
"Don't cry, don't cry, keep it together y/n.", you mumbled to yourself, while sniffling...
Did you know you make me so happy that sometimes I actually forget to breathe? I'll be looking at you, my chest explodes and all I want to do is take you in my arms and kiss you. You're breathtakingly beautiful. My life found a new meaning and passion when I met you. The way you look at me, talk to me, touch me, hug me, kiss me, everything, makes me feel very special. I wanna thank you for always being there, for forgiving me whenever I have messed up horribly, for trusting me after everything you've been through and for loving me. I hit the jackpot when I found you, you're perfect y/n, so damn perfect, I swear. I could go on and on about you, you know, I have to wind up. I hope you like everything I sent you. I miss you and I love you, y/n. I'm always here for you, whatever you need, I'm here.
P.S- Sorry if the drawings are bad, but I wanted to do it myself. If that makes you laugh then so be it, your laugh could cure diseases, that's how beautiful it is. I have to stop, god, I'm rambling even while writing. I'll call you as soon as the show is over. Have an amazing day my gorgeous forever valentine.
Bucket loads of love,
Your sexy hot husband, Harry.
______________________________________________
1 month later:-
"Uh how about lunch?', Niall asked.
"I'm not hungry.", you whined and curled around in the blankets.
"But you have to eat when you're sick.", he said. You were in the couch, curled up. You’ve been feeling a bit sick since the past few days.
"I might throw up if I eat.", you said.
Niall sighed. "Have you told Harry?", he asked, looking down at you in concern.
"No, don't tell him."
"Why not?"
"Cause he'll be worried for no reason and he can't concentrate on what he's doing.", you said. YouI just wanted to cuddle in your husband’s arms right now but of course that can't happen.
“Do you want me to go grab you some medicine or something?”, Niall asks. You smile and shake your head.
“I’m fine, Ni. You can go if you’re busy..”, you tell your friend, patting his arm. Niall was worried about you, so he dropped by to see for himself.
“I’m free today.”, Niall said.
"Can we watch a movie?", you asked hopefully. He smiled, ruffling your hair. "Course we can, if I get to pick.", he added.
You talk to Niall as you watch the movie, and when Niall goes to get some snacks from the kitchen, you get a thought. You hadn’t got your period this month. Now, you were feeling sick.
“Oh shit. No way.”, you gasped, and sat up.
“What’s wrong? You gonna puke again?”, Niall asks, munching loudly as he comes back with two bags of chips.
“No. I didn’t get my period!”
“Isn’t that good? You complain about cramps.”, Niall shrugs, sitting down beside you. You smack his arm, making him yelp. “Ow! What’s that for?”
“I-I could be pregnant!”
Niall’s big blue eyes widened, his munching slowing down in pace. “Wow.”
You stood up, your heart beating fast. So many thoughts ran through your mind. You know Harry wants to have kids someday, and so do you, but it’s not even been a year since your wedding and you both are so busy right now, with your careers.
“Oh god..i-it can’t be, right?”
Niall sees just how freaked out you’re getting in, and he cleans his hand before keeping it on your shoulder. “y/n, look at me. Deep breath. You don’t know for sure. And if you are pregnant, I’m sure you both will figure it all out, okay?”
You nod, taking a deep breath like he said. “I s-should take a pregnancy test.”
Niall nods. “Do you have any?”
“I think I have one. I’ll get some more later. I-I’ll uh..be right back.”
Niall gives you a hug. “I’ll be here, hm? You do what you have to do.”
“Thanks Niall.”, you whisper, squeezing him before pulling away and heading upstairs. You had two pregnancy tests laying around just for emergencies like these. It wasn’t the first time you were having pregnancy scares.
You decided to use both the tests, and you waited anxiously. You’ve always wanted to be a mom, and Harry would make an amazing dad, no doubt. You were just worried about the timing of it all.
Finally, it was five minutes and you took a look at both of them. Both showed a similar result.
Two lines.
“O-Oh my god.”, you gasped, your eyes welling up with tears. There was a human life inside you. You were going to be a mother!
_____________________________________________________
You were counting down days, waiting for Harry to come home. Tour would still go on once he’s back, but it would be the UK leg, so at least he’d be close. The only people who knew you were pregnant were your gynecologist, Niall and Kiara.You didn’t want to tell your husband the news over the phone, so you waited.
You thought of different ways to tell Harry you were pregnant, but then you decided just to show him the pregnancy test. You were too nervous for anything else.
Finally, it was the day Harry was coming back home, and you rushed to get the door as you heard the doorbell.
There stood your tall, curly, handsome husband. He wore a black shirt with the first few buttons open showing off his tattooed chest, paired with his usual skinny black jeans. His eyes were bright, and his face broke into a charming smile as he took you in.
Even after traveling for hours, he looked like that.
He let his luggage drop to wrap you up in his arms. “I’m home, baby!!”
“You are!”, you giggled as he spun you around. He grinned as he kept you down, only to grab your face. “You gonna kiss me or what?”, you smirk, and he laughs, closing the distance between your lips’.
You pulled him inside and closed the door. “Oh it smells so good, darling, and I’m starving.”, Harry hums, putting his arms out again. “Another hug, please. Missed you so much.”
You smile. “I have a surprise for you before that.”
“You’re surprising me every time we meet, kitten.”, he chuckles. You pulled out the pregnancy test from your pocket, and held it out.
Harry’s jaw hung open and a range of emotions flashed through his eyes.You waited for him to come down from his state of shock and when he did, he choked out, “R-Really?”
You nod, smiling through your tears. “I-I’m pregnant, Harry.”
Harry laughed, but the tears were gushing out of his eyes. “W-We’re gonna have a baby. y/n, sweetheart, this is amazing.” Your head crashed against his chest as he tugs you into his arms again.
“You’re happy?”, you whisper, looking up at him.
“Of course I’m happy.”, he sniffles, touching his forehead to yours. “I love you so, so much.”
“I love you too, Harry.” Harry brings a hand to your middle, and you smile, placing your hand over his as he greets your baby. “Hey there, little Styles. It's your daddy."
_______________________________________________
Taglist: @harrydeary, @harryswifee, @harrysbxtchh, @gracelovesethan
Please let me know if you want me to add you to my taglist! Please Reblog and like to support my writing. Thank you so much for reading:)
#harry styles#harry styles smut#harry styles imagines#harry styles writing#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fluff#harry styles masterlist#harry styles fic#harry styles x reader#harry styles au#harry styles one shot#harry styles one direction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles imagine#one direction#niall horan#best friend!niall#husband!harry#boyfriend!harry#pregnant!reader#dadrry#dad!harry#harry styles blurb#harry styles blog#harry styles boyfriend#harry styles drabble#harry styles angst#harry fluff#harry fanfic#harry fic
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Best Friend's Dad!Harry
best friend's dad!harry x reader - forbidden relationship au
Warnings: 18+ only, NSFW, smut, age gap, cheating, lying, angst, breeding kink
Song to listen to: Illicit Affairs (you guys have said over and over again that this song fits this series perfectly and I couldn't agree more)
note: should be read from top to bottom in order (unless noted that can be read as standalone)
Let Me Show You (6.3k words) - can be read as standalone
How your illicit affair with Mr. Styles began
Desperate (3.6k words) - can be read as standalone
A party at the Styles' house + sneaky bathroom sex
The Big Tease (7.8k words)
Some heavy teasing leads to you giving in to Mr. Styles
Not Fair (6.5k words)
Harry suggests something to you that blows up in his face *angsty*
He's Not You (7.8k words)
The aftermath of Harry's bright idea has some downfalls and he didn't expect to feel this way.
Liar (6.1k words)
Harry's wife suspects something is going on but she doesn't know what. Harry can't stay away from you and you don't want him to.
More of You (5.1k words) - can be read as standalone
Harry's at your place for a couple of days and you're enjoying having him all to yourself.
Crush (3.5k words) - can be read as standalone
A flashback: When your feelings for Mr. Styles morph from just finding him attractive to a full on crush you feel a little guilty. But then when he shows more than just a friendly interest in you at Fae's 22nd birthday party you two become close and eventually ebb on inappropriate, but you can't seem to stop.
Magic Spell (5.3k words) - can be read as standalone
A raucous Halloween party turns naughty when you and Harry find a hidden room at the Baylor mansion.
Under His Bed (4.5k words)
Harry invites you to stay at his house for the night and the following morning you both get an unexpected visitor.
Relax (4.9k words)
Fae asks you something that you aren't prepared to answer. You and Harry discuss what to do next.
Here's to Us (6.4k words)
A quick little weekend getaway is sweet and romantic. You reveal something that makes Harry do something a bit out of character.
Homewrecker (7.2k words)
The one where you and Harry finally come clean to everyone. Featuring an angry Fae, a spiteful soon-to-be ex wife, divorce terms, and lots of tears.
The Warning (4.5k words)
You and Harry are trying to heal after coming clean to everyone and Mrs. Styles comes to you with a warning.
A Little Naughty (3.3k words)
Your parents invite Harry to come with you for Christmas and you feel a little bit naughty after everyone's in bed.
Best Valentine's Day (4.2k words)
It's Valentine's Day and Harry's got something special planned.
Intuition (3.4k words)
Harry's got a surprise for you.
Must Be Nice (3.4k words)
You and Harry feel like everything's coming together perfectly. You're both getting all the things you wanted. But when you run into Fae while shopping and she notices something new about you, it bursts your little happy bubble.
The message blurb (453 words)
Fae unblocks you.
Heartburn (4k)
You and Harry have been anxious about seeing Fae at your baby shower but things go so well it leaves you both feeling relieved. Except for the small run-in with Fae's mom. Featuring: lactation smut!
MORE TO COME!
divider by @firefly-graphics
#bfd!harry#best friend's dad!harry#harry styles x reader#harry styles#harry styles smut#firstpost#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles one shot#harry styles fan fiction#harry styles fic#harry styles writing#harry styles x yn#harry styles x y/n#harry x reader#harry x yn#harry x y/n#harry#harry smut#harry styles fiction#harry styles fan fic
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Flower
Hello… here is another mini series I started even tho I have other things I definitely need to finish…. But I’m kinda obsessed with them so I hope you guys like them 🫢
Check out our Patreon for early access to part 2 and 180+ exclusive writings!
WC- 2.8k
Warnings- y/n being oblivious, stupidly sweet h, things alluding to masturbation
“Y’know that isn’t normal for him, right?” Gia murmured as she came up next to Y/N. The low light of the bar had her squinting slightly, but thankfully the rock music wasn’t blaring too loud over the speakers over here. Coming after work, she had looked forward to meeting up with her friends for some much needed socialization- even if she was exhausted.
Confusion painted her features, looking at her friend with furrowed brows. “What are you talking about?”
“Harry. He’s like, all over you. All the time” She looked over to the man with a smirk, who had previously excused himself to participate in this round of pool. Y/N wasn’t much for the game so she stayed back in their seats, taking a moment to decompress. Or, try to. Sometimes it got a bit overwhelming with so many people talking at once.
“He’s just touchy, isn’t he?” Y/N had only known Harry for a few months, moving here to teach and one of her coworkers so kindly helped integrate Y/N into her friend group. Harry owned a contracting business, actually, and Y/N had been getting lots of help from him on a variety of projects. Specifically, the latest project regarding his expertise in what sort of bannister she should have for the staircase. It was antique, and she didn’t want to be like those flippers she saw online who ruined the charm of old houses. If she wanted a brand new build, she would have bought one. “See?”
Harry had his arm around Mitch, laughing about something probably a little dumb. The man was borderline tipsy but he’d just started his water rounds. He seemed to be an affectionate person, cuddly. At least to her and Mitch and Niall, all of whom seemed used to it.
“Yeah, but not with women. He’s more reserved when it comes to them but not with you. Like… what was that before?” Her cheeks flushed slightly as dhe knew exactly when her friend was talking about. Harry had come back from the bar with their soft pretzel and another drink for her, and when he sat down she was promptly dragged into his lap. She’d let out a yelp but it turned into a laugh, settling in his thighs. Of course there was no admitting that her stomach had erupted in butterflies and she felt them kick up every time he rested his chin on her or squeezed her a little tighter to him. That the scent of his cologne had become something that grounded her anxiety in the moment, and it was weird how he seemed to be an anchor for her every time he pulled something like that. Somehow he just had that sort of effect on her.
Now that she mentioned it, she had noticed Sarah’s eyes widening when he did that, but she had assumed it was just for the pure audacity of a man manhandling a woman into his lap and ripping off a piece of cheese dipped pretzel and bringing it to her mouth.
Y/N knew Harry was a cuddle bug. He was needy, like a pup, nosing and pawing his way into peoples hearts. But she assumed he did this sort of stuff with everyone. Maybe she wasn’t paying enough attention, but she had been too nervous to allow herself to think of his touches as flirtation. It would bring down the wall she’d tried to set there to not get her hopes up and look too deep into things. It had gotten her heart bruised a few times already. “Oh.” She replied, looking at her slowly emptying glass. “I, um, didn’t really think about that. He’s been pretty handsy for a long time.” He was also a flirt. Said things on purpose to make her flustered, but only in her ear so she’d get even more worked up. That was something he really liked to do- whisper in her ear or close to her to share something only with her.
“Babes, you need to open your eyes. That man is completely gone for you. Smitten kitten. I was convinced you guys were secretly banging but I was trying to mind my business… but you mentioned a dating site earlier and I got confused.” She’d wholeheartedly thought they were already an item. “You need to talk to him or make a move or something. He’s all but pissed on you to claim you from the rest of the group, and he keeps looking over here to check on you. He acts like your boyfriend already, but there are more benefits you can cash in on if you just go for it.” She wiggled her brows making Y/N groan, hiding her head in her hands.
She was way too sober for this conversation.
Of course she had interest in Harry. Some feelings, even, but he’d never expressed interest in dating anyone. How could she not? He was almost unreal, checking loads of boxes she had in her mental list of ‘what my dream man would have’, including the dimple thing. The fact that he always said he was “waiting for the right one to find me” when she’d ask floated back into her mind, clearing a bit of the fog that usually surrounded her when she thought about him. Had he been trying to tell her something?
Y/N could admit she wasn’t the most perceptive at times. She was a little oblivious, some could say, and didn’t read into signs well. The trait was something that used to get her into trouble when she was younger, her head always off in the clouds instead of where it needed to be according to the adults around her. It was possible she missed something, but she wanted to find out how to rectify that.
“Speak of the devil…” Gia whispered, moving over a bit with a snicker as Harry seamlessly slipped back into the booth and ran his hand over her hair. Y/N felt his presence like a blanket, face turning to look at him and his concerned features. That little wrinkle between his brow she always noticed when he was upset or focusing heavily on something.
“Hi, petal. Something wrong? Headache?” He asked delicately in case the answer was yes. She got migraines frequently, as much as it sucked- but Harry had brought her some pain relievers while she was at work once to save her ass. God, her head was a mess but it wasn’t from the migraine this time around.
“No, I’m okay.” She lifted her head, feeling his hand slide under her hair to hold the back of her neck. Hopefully he wouldn’t see the chills settling on her skin as his thumb rubbed over the side of her throat, concern still etched on his features. “Was just a bit dehydrated but I’m fine now.” Her smile must not have been as convincing as she tried, his lips pursing as he shook his head.
“Got t’be careful with eating the salty chips and then having the drinks… one glass isn’t gonna be enough.” He sighed. “Stay here for me, yeah? I’ll be right back, let me get you some water.” Without thinking he leaned in and pressed a peck to her temple, sliding back out of the booth leaving the spot tingling. Sitting there with rapidly blinking eyes, she watched the stretch of muscles flex under his tee shirt as he made his way towards the bar to order said water.
Okay. Yeah. Now that she mentioned it, she definitely knew he didn’t press little kisses to the rest of the girl’s heads, or give that amount of attention to her but… again, she had tried to ignore it. Tried not to get her hopes up.
“Girl… you’ve got to see it now.” Gia’s brows were raised up. “You’ve got him wrapped around your finger.”
Maybe she was right.
——
“I’m okay, H. I promise.” Y/N laughed out the words as he brought the straw back to her mouth and gave her a look. “Fine. But I’m gonna have t’piss soon if you keep force feeding water down my throat.” She shook her head as she took another drink, making a show of swallowing it. “See? Done.”
Harry’s eyes had dipped down to her throat when she swallowed and back up to her mouth, taking a beat too long to respond. “Good. You… we can’t have you feeling poorly tomorrow. Are y’still up for it?” His hand was traveling around her body. Not in a sexual way, not really, but over her shoulders. Rubbing her arm. Cupping the back of her neck. Fiddling with her hair. For the first time, Y/N could consciously see what Gia was talking about. Maybe it was sad she needed someone else’s validation of it first, but now that she had it she didn’t feel as crazy for the emotions she felt.
“Of course.” Harry was taking her to a sick used bookstore that he had helped remodel a few years back. When he found out she had gotten back into a reading mood lately, he’d suggested it immediately over text under the table, which now that she was thinking about it…. It was obviously to ensure it would be just the two of them. No one else. He wanted to take her by herself, a little outing for just the two of them.
Stupid butterflies kicked in overdrive. “I’ve been dying to grab some new books.”
“I know. I remembered it when the owner called me a few days back about something and knew I had t’take you.” He grinned, leaning in a bit as he tucked the hair behind her ear. “I really hope you’ll like it.”
Y/N didn’t have much time to respond before the chatter got louder and the group that had gone back up to the bar for more drink ambled back and climbed into the booth. This time it wasn’t as much of a shock when she was scooped up into his lap, but it still made her hot under the skin. Her tummy swirled as he wrapped one solid arm around her and rested his chin on her shoulder, the other running over her thigh. It wasn’t suggestive, closer to her knee as he began to rub his thumb over the soft skin there.
For some reason it was getting to her, making her worked up. The gentle touches, the wholesome nature of it made her feel a bit ashamed as she felt herself throb between her thighs, but it only got worse when he adjusted her in his lap, lifting her like it was nothing. Of course he had strength, the man hauled lumber by himself and did all sorts of superhuman shit when it came to construction, but it still shocked her every time she got to experience it first hand.
Taking a moment to think about it, it was always apparent that he was a beautiful man with a beautiful body. One thing that she really liked were his arms. Just as a whole. Hands, arms, how they’d built out a bit from all the hands on work. His hands could be a little rough with some callouses from those tools, but her grandma always did tell her that was the sign of a hard working man. It wasn’t something she focused on before because she had tried to deny the possibility of not only rejection but not being able to be in the friend group if things went sour.. At the moment she was past that.
She could see the vein in his arm just a bit, near the anchor tattoo. His hand curled over her knee, almost possessively. This entire position was him claiming her. Realizing now he’d never pulled any of the other girls as close as he did her made her head spin. Hell, he really didn’t do much than give a friendly hug or hand to help them if they were stumbling. Fuck, he could actually feel something for her. Far past friendship.
“You’re quiet.” His words were so close they almost vibrated in her ear, making her startle a bit. “Shit, sorry Petal. Didn’t mean to scare you.” The little smile given to her made its way into her bloodstream, heating her up the longer he looked at her. “Why are you in your head, hm? Tired?”
The way he spoke to her was so tender and sweet… gah! Now that she was allowing the possibility to be a thought, it was shaking her up.
“Yeah, getting tired.” She wasn’t lying. Her Friday classes had been a handful. That was the truth. “Need to take a long shower and sleep until an hour before you come to pick me up.”
“Sounds like a good plan. What kind of soap or shampoo do you use?” He asked, a noticeable shift in his voice. A little deeper, softer for her ears only. It was intimate, she realized. How he spoke to her privately with her tucked in his lap. Her body melted further into him, but the lump in her throat had expanded from the realization. “You always smell fuckin’ amazing.” His nose skimmed over the side of her jaw making her exhale shakily. He was taking an inhale of her as he hugged her body against him. Her poor vibrator was in for it when she got home.
“Uh- it’s like a coconut citrus mix?” She had to think about it. It was hard to focus on anything with her revelations at hand and the man of the hour touching her so liberally. Like she was his to touch. It wasn’t disrespectful and she knew he was the first person to read her body language- hell, he probably could read her mind better than she could process her own thoughts. But it was still sinking in, the feelings gripping her stomach. “Thank you. I try my best. No one wants to be stinky.” Nose crinkling in disgust, she felt him shake his head against her.
“Trust me when I say you’re the best smelling person I’ve met. Wouldn’t complain if all my things smelled like you.” Oh? He didn’t elaborate, but there was a barely there kiss to the hinge of her jaw rendering her speechless. His reaction was to place his chin back on her shoulder, interjecting into Niall’s rant while Y/N sat there trying to process what that was.
Deciding to test something made her really nervous, but she wanted to see what he’d do. While he was always the affectionate one and she never pushed him away, she didn’t usually return it as much. He always sought her out and she reciprocated but she wasn’t one to initiate a lot… so she wanted to see what he’d do.
Letting out a yawn, she leaned her head against his shoulder and let her head nuzzle into his neck. Without saying a word, her hand went for his on her thigh and weaved their fingers together, pulling it further up her thigh. Holding his hand, she could feel his body stiffen ever so slightly for a mere moment and his heart rate pick up. His other arm around her tightened, thumb rubbing the back of her hand. “Comfy?” He mumbled to her.
“Mhm.” She nodded, letting his hand squeeze hers. He was just solid and sturdy. She could lean against him and feel protected in a way. Why she hadn’t tried this sooner she didn’t know, but she could hear his mood get better as he spoke. It was palpable, like he was vibrating a little bit, squeezing her hand every once in a while to remind her he was there. Or maybe it was for his own mind?
It continued like this for a bit until everyone decided to get going, Harry being the last to stand. He was gentle about helping her off his lap, beating her to get on his feet and offered his hand to her to help her up. “C’mon, sleepy Flower. Time for your shower and sleep. Can’t have you too tired for the selection of books, hm?” His hand steady on the small of her back, he led her to the car with a bit of a delay as they said good, a hug tight and lifting her off the ground a bit as he did so before having her promise to text when she got home.
She fulfilled the promise, as well as her guilty vibrator session thinking about that tiny kiss on her skin and his hand on her knee, hoping that would make her chill out. It didn’t.
#jarofstyles#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles one shot#harry styles fanfic#harry styles smut#harry writing#harry styles imagine#harry drabble#harry styles blurb#harry styles writing#flower h#harry styles au#harry smut#harry fluff#harry angst#best friend harry styles#best friends to lovers#friends to lovers#harry styles fanfics#harry styles fic
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Sleepy Drunk
This is short, and bad. I've just been out of it and writing some angsty Klaus Mikaelson fanfics on my other blog, @aklaustaleteller (check it out if you're interested!) But I do think I'm getting back in my Harry groove, so wish me luck because I'm going to go and try to write a fic set in Hogwarts (and yes, I'm making Styles a Slytherin :))
Verse - Footballer!Harry x Art Director!Y/n
Word Count - I'm too tired to check but it's definitely less than 1k.
Warnings - Drunkenness ...*shrugs*
"C'mere," Hary mumbled, opening his arms for her.
She let a sloppy smile slip at that and lost her balance while getting up and slowly but surely staggering into his arms. Letting her body limp on him, she giggled when Harry walked backwards and dragged her into the bathroom.
"Sit," he asked of her as he washed his hands and once done, he turned and noticed that she had fallen asleep standing against the door.
Drying his hands, Harry placed his hands on her hips to move her. "C'mon, sit," he said but when she kept smiling at him, Harry sat her up himself.
"You really are a handful when you're drunk," he chuckled, shaking his head.
"No, I'm not," Y/n pouted, slapping his arm as he tied her hair up into a bun, at least close to one. "No, I'm not!" She protested once again as if he hadn't heard her.
"Okay, okay -- you aren't!" Harry surrendered, laughing and rubbing his wet hands on her face to get it wet. He then gently rubbed some cleanser on her face, watching in intrigue as her makeup started mixing up.
"Um -- I think I was supposed to wipe it off first," looking at her nervously, he trailed off.
"It's okay, I didn't have much on," she giggled, followed through by a hiccup.
With a smile on his mouth, Harry wiped off her face and began looking through serums when he heard her tell him that the toner was on the right end.
"Yes, yes," he mumbled to himself as he took the bottle out and sprayed some on her face from a little too far ...but it worked just fine.
Patting that into her skin, he went back to the serums and picked out the ones he's seen her apply the night before while he was brushing his teeth. Putting drops of each one, he massaged them in before putting the other ones on.
"Moisturizer, yes?" He asked, unsure whether it should be her eye cream instead.
She shook her head, her eyes closed and head resting against the mirror.
"Well, I can't seem to find your eye cream," Harry sighed, deciding to just skip it for a night.
He took out some of the moisturizer in his palm and put it on her face, proceeding to rub it in as gently as he could.
"I think that's it... we're skipping the eye cream and brushing tonight," he laughed boyishly, lifting her off of the counter and taking her to bed. "I can never perfect the art of changing your clothes," he shook his head, looking at the clothe she'd gone out in spilled everywhere in the room.
"I thought you'd change overtime but you're still that sleepy drunk that you were in uni," he chuckled, sliding the duvet over her as light snores began passing from her mouth again.
"Sleep tight, sleepy girl," he whispered, another smile creeping up his lips before he placed a kiss on her forehead.
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It's Always Been You - Chapter 12
james potter x fem!reader
summary - Things hadn't gotten much better with James, and you knew you could only go so long without talking to him—after all, he was still your best friend. But, considering all that'd happened, along with some encouragement from your friends, you knew the time had come to finally admit you wanted more than that.
wc [6.2k]
a/n: alr guys ... very happy and also sad to say this is the last chapter of it's always been you!! :( i've loved every minute of writing this series as well as sharing it (its become my baby atp), and it is definitely because of all the love and support everyone reading has given it. thank u to everyone stuck around to this point, & i hope u guys enjoy this last chapter!! i send all my hugs and kisses <3 - e
all chapters | <- Chapter 11
It'd been another hour or two until everyone had fully returned from Hogsmeade and dinner was being served in the Great Hall. You finally changed out of your dress and into your everyday clothing again, already feeling better, but that didn't mean you felt good. You didn't think you could feel good when both your brain and heart were hurting like they were. And worst of all, the one person you'd go to in times like these for comfort was the same person you couldn't go to. Not now.
The girls had been doing their best to get your mind off of everything that had happened that day, aside from when Marlene profusely apologized to you for letting Potter hear her outburst in the common room.
"Although, I have to say," she admitted afterward. "I'm not completely sorry for him that he had to hear it. I may be brutal but I never tell a lie."
That fact didn't leave you as you sat with her and Lily in the Great Hall for dinner, a number of seats away from the other Marauders. You recognized with a skip in your heartbeat that James was with them, surprisingly enough since you knew how he was accustomed to skipping meals in the dining hall when he wanted to be alone, a habit you both unfortunately shared. But that didn't mean he was enjoying himself either.
You could see even from your seat down the table that he wasn't saying much, mostly keeping to himself quietly, something so out of character for him yet you'd seen him do it constantly the entire week. You wanted to yell at him and shake him silly, but you also wanted to hug him. When you caught yourself in the midst of those thoughts you turned back to your own spot at the table shamefully.
You tried to force yourself to eat, catching your friends' concerned looks at your full plate, but you didn't feel much like it. Especially not when you still felt maybe a dozen pairs of eyes on you from every corner of the Great Hall.
Even with all that'd happened since just that morning, the rumors and whatever else people had come up with to talk about had not yet been forgotten about by the school like your friends said it would be. Then you thought about whether news had spread of your disastrous date in Hogsmeade, and prayed that nobody had caught wind of that incident either. You didn't think you could handle any more of the staring.
Immediately after you had that thought, you spotted a fifth-year in Ravenclaw robes walking past your table, watching as he blatantly pointed at you as he spoke to his friend, and you looked down at your plate with hardened eyes.
You heard Marlene scoff from next to you. "Hey!" she called to the boy. "Didn't your mother ever tell you it was rude to point?"
The fifth-year didn't respond to her but looked to his friend, hurriedly taking a seat at his own table, his whispers being drowned out in the loudness of the dining hall.
Marlene fumed from next to you. "I can't believe these people. Are they really that bored with their own lives that they're so obsessed with a bloody rumor?"
You shook your head toying with your fork. "Just ignore them. That's what I've settled on doing."
She sighed from beside you and you thought that'd be the end of everything, until you heard gasps from down the table. You looked up and followed the sounds and were met with a sight not even the magic of Hogwarts could've prepared you for.
James—your James—had stood up on the bench he'd once been sitting in, and you thanked Merlin he wasn't standing fully on the table; though you had absolutely no idea what he could possibly be up to, you knew it couldn't be anything good. He cupped a hand to his mouth as your heartrate picked up.
"Can I have everyone's attention?"
He didn't have to ask twice for it. His voice boomed out loudly, something that seemed to come naturally to him, and the noise in the Great Hall had died out in a mere second until it was almost completely silent—quiet enough for you to hear the beating of your heart in your chest as you looked up at him. Your throat went dry.
"Not that it's any of anyone's business," he started confidently to the hundreds of eyes now looking at him, tone nothing but sober. "But nothing happened in the broom closet. Or in the locker room."
You felt the churning in your stomach claw up into your throat, then felt it drop back down, keeping you stationed in your seat. He didn't give much context to his declaration, but with the popularity of the topic amongst the school, it didn't seem like he needed to. His voice almost seemed to echo, all other noises drowning out as everyone stared up at him. James looked around the entire room appearing completely unafraid and you didn't know how the hell he did it; you probably looked more fearful than him.
"So," he began again, "I don't want to see or hear anyone talking about those rumors any longer. And if anyone has a problem with that, they can answer to me. Alright?"
Of course, nobody said anything then, but you could see in their eyes that they were going to listen to him. Or at least, they'd make sure they didn't get caught going against him. Maybe it was from his impenetrably confident voice or his respected status around the school, you weren't sure, but he had that unique effect on people in an almost effortless way.
When it was clear he'd gotten his point across, he scanned his eyes over the sea of students until they found yours. In a dizzying way, it felt like you were the only two in the room for a moment, as cliché as the thought sounded in your head.
You didn't know what had motivated him to do what he did, but you could see in his eyes something fragile that juxtaposed the self-assured look they'd had only seconds ago. He looked away again and stepped back down to floor level once more, not taking a moment before striding out of the Great Hall, his form disappearing seconds after.
Even without his physical presence, his action seemed to linger over the room for a moment more before chatter broke out once again. You were still frozen in place, not knowing if moving would finalize the idea that whatever just happened was real and not just part of some wild dream.
Marlene had confirmed that it definitely had happened, however, when she turned to you with her jaw dropped, an amazed but delighted sparkle in her eye. "Someone tell me you saw that too."
"Oh we saw it," rang Lily, who also looked much too happy about that fact, probably just relieved James's antics weren't centered on her for once. You could see them both staring at you expectantly, waiting for you to react. You could also see the boys in your peripheral, the three of them remaining at the table searching your face for a reaction.
Yet, all you could do was stand up and walk hurriedly towards the exit. Dozens of conversations rushed past your ears as you did, a blur of remarks ranging from "Potter's lost it" to "He's so bloody fit." Whatever they were saying, you noted with gratefulness in the back of your mind that none of the conversations were about you.
You reached the doorway and stopped once you were a safe distance away in the hallway, heaving breaths in for a moment to yourself before finding that you weren't alone. All of your friends had followed you without blinking an eye, and you didn't know whether you found it endearing or inconvenient. Though, to be fair, you didn't know where you were going. You just knew you couldn't sit there and pretend as if nothing had happened.
You blinked at the three boys who neared you with puzzled looks on each of their faces. "Did you guys know anything about this?"
"No," promised Sirius. "In fact, James has hardly said anything to us since this morning."
You shook your head to yourself, feeling breathless. "I can't ... believe he would do that."
"Really?" Lily stared at you. "I mean, it's Potter we're talking about. It's exactly something he would do."
You couldn't fight the smile that tugged on the corners of your lips even as you shook your head. You ran a hand over your hair as the blonde from next to you hit you in the shoulder.
"Well? What are you waiting for?" You frowned over at her as she stared at you expectantly. "Go to him."
You stilled, gaping at her. "What?"
"Go to him. Do I have to spell it out for you?"
You tipped your head at her like it would help you understand her better, parting your drying lips. "I thought you said he was a selfish git." You heard Remus snort from beside you.
"I did, sure," reasoned Marlene, not without a hint of pride. "But only because I thought he was ruining your chances of moving on now that you were over him. But seriously, I can see your face when you look at him." She shook her head. "That's not the look of someone who wants to move on."
Your eyes flickered over her face as she spoke, an infinite number of thoughts overtaking you. In the silence of your thinking, a Hufflepuff boy walked past the six of you in the hallway, staring all the while.
"What are you looking at?" snapped Marlene, turning to him without missing a beat. "Did you not just hear Potter?"
Like he'd heard him loud and clear, and also like he was scared of Marlene, he hurried away with his head bent forward. Satisfied, the blonde turned back to you. At your conflicted expression, she asked, "Well?"
You chewed on the inside of your cheek. "It's just that," you began, not even knowing where you were going with your rambling. "I've spent so long trying to get over him. It's not fair to myself to just forget all of that, and it definitely wasn't fair to Sebastian-"
"For Merlin's sake," cut in Lily, to your surprise. "You keep talking about what's fair and what's unfair, but what about you? What do you want?"
You stared at her, beginning to feel breathless under the eyes of all your friends. "It's not just about what I want. It's not that simple."
"But what if it is?" she questioned. "I know how difficult this has all been for you. And I know you said Potter doesn't just get to realize his feelings for you and suddenly be with you, that it doesn't work like that. But what if it does?" She raised her hands at her sides. "Not everything is a perfect story to tell. Especially not when it comes to you two. It's not every day you fall in love with your best friend and he finally sees that he's fallen for you too. Are you seriously going to let him go because of some made-up system of rules?"
Your breath was becoming staggering now, and you didn't know what to think, because everything they were telling you sounded so right.
"I don't know," you began unsurely. "Of course, I don't want to lose him. Not talking to him for the past week has been harder than I ever could've imagined. I don't even know what it would feel like to have to do it for longer than I already have been." You blinked down at your shoes, truly realizing those things at the same rate you said them. "I think I just ... miss him."
"Of course you miss him." Marlene looked at you sympathetically. "That's why I think you should go tell all this to him."
You felt bile rising in your throat. "I don't even know if he'd want to see me after all we've said to each other."
"Are you joking?" Remus butted in exasperatedly. "Prongs is bloody in love with you. Can't you see that?"
"Remus," you warned softly because you didn't know how much more of this hope you could take before you did something you'd regret.
"I'm telling the truth." His voice was heavy with meaning. "Maybe it took him a while to realize it himself, but the rest of us have had to sit back and watch you both act like you don't have feelings for each other for years. Believe me, the only reason he's in his room right now and not with you is because he thinks that's what you want."
Your brows pinched. "You can't truly know that."
"Really?" he laughed. "What do you think we talked about that night Vance asked you out?"
Your expression faltered and you forced yourself to think back to the night James had begun acting distant from you, though it wasn't difficult to, the storyline of it all clicking into place in your head.
"You," breathed Remus. "We talked about you."
"Not to mention," Sirius added, "we're the ones who've had to spend every night in our dorm listening to him bitch and moan about Vance this and Vance that." You swallowed at your friends' words, but they didn't quit.
"And we know James was being a right idiot today," Sirius insisted honestly. "But you should've seen him this morning right after you two argued. He was heartbroken. More than he'd ever been over Evans." He turned to the redhead in question. "No offense, Evans."
Lily rolled her eyes lightheartedly. "Trust me, Black, none taken."
He nodded and turned back to you swiftly. "So for you to think that James would want anything other than to fix things with you and just be with you is bloody mental."
You stared at all of your friends who were looking so determinedly back at you that you didn't think you could tell them 'no' now. But still, your feet didn't budge.
"It's not just that," you almost whispered. "I guess I'm just ... scared. What if it goes wrong and we get into some ridiculous fight again? What then?"
Marlene took a hold of your shoulders, slightly scaring you in her resoluteness. "Potter just stood up and yelled at the entire bloody school and you're trying to tell us you'rescared?" She shook you a little, and your friends smirked from behind her. "Be a Gryffindor for Godric's sake! Go to him!"
Before you could say anything more, she was turning you around and shoving you a little until you had the momentum you needed to take steps toward the Gryffindor common room. You made it all the way up the nearest set of steps before you paused, turning back to your friends with a grateful smile.
"Thank you, you guys." You expected them to share the sweet moment with you, but they only rolled their eyes.
"Go, woman!" Sirius groaned, and you rolled your eyes back at them, but it lacked any real annoyance.
You didn't know exactly what you were planning on doing, but you didn't have time to think about it because your legs were carrying you speedily through the halls in your anxious state and wouldn't let you stop until you reached the portrait entrance to the Gryffindor common room. Taking a steadying breath in, you said the password and entered the room.
With everyone else still being at dinner in the Great Hall, it wasn't exactly difficult to find James. He sat in the common room, his brunette head of curls visible to you in the low light. They covered the majority of his face that you could see, his head tipped downwards with his elbows resting on his knees. That changed within the blink of an eye as you entered the room, his head swiftly lifting until he locked eyes with you, and you had to fight a shiver at the feeling it sent shuddering through you.
He seemed to think you were just going to go to your own dorm and ignore him, and he averted his eyes to look somewhere else, maybe the fireplace, until you left—but you didn't. You only walked closer to him until you were separated by only one of the couches, the distance still small enough to make your breathing quicken.
At the soundlessness of your stilled footsteps, James looked back up and met your eyes again, and he swallowed. Clearly, he hadn't expected you to make any move to talk to him that night, even after the scene he'd made in the Great Hall. The problem was that you hadn't expected yourself to either, and now you didn't know what you wanted to say first, because there were certainly a million things you had to make sure he knew.
"Thank you," you said, because you figured it was a good place to start. He nodded up at you, his eyes not revealing much of anything, but you didn't let that sway you. "You didn't have to do that, you know."
"Of course I did." His voice was stubborn, but too sincere for how little his expression gave away.
You looked down at your feet, letting a moment pass before speaking again. "Well, now it seems like everyone is going to be talking about you from now on."
"That doesn't matter to me." James's voice cut through the air richly, and when you looked back up from the floor he was staring at you meaningfully. "They can say whatever the hell they want. As long as they're not talking about you."
Your shoulders dropped at his words, and the way he held your eyes as he said them made your heart beat faster in your chest. It hadn't even been a full day since you'd last spoken to him, but you already missed him.
"They wouldn't leave you alone," he said concretely, his tone beginning to fill with emotion. "And then, I heard what Marlene said in the common room, about some girl harassing you in the library? I-" he shook his head frustratedly, rubbing at his forehead with one of his hands. "I'm just mad at myself that I've let it go on for this long. Or that I didn't even know that happened."
You already felt too emotional for your liking, the feelings inside of you swirling more aggressively at every word he said to you. "It's not like it's your fault, James."
"Well it's not like I did much to stop it, did I?" He seemed genuinely angry at himself now, and you didn't know what you could do to help. A painful lump was rising in your throat, but you stayed rooted in your spot behind the sofa. "And I'd ask you why you didn't come and tell me, but that'd be a bloody stupid question."
He shook his head, eyes becoming wistful like he was recalling a memory, one that pained him. "Earlier, when Marlene was defending you in the common room, the look on your face was ... I don't know. Crushed. Sad."
You swallowed at the memory, because that had been exactly how you were feeling, amongst thousands of other ways. James looked down at his lap.
"I just wanted to try and help, do anything to make that look on your face go away, but I couldn't. So I just kept replaying how you looked in my head, and the more I thought about it, the more I hated myself because I realized you were only hurting because of me. And that was the worst part. Realizing that it was all my fault."
You felt yourself wanting to take a step towards him, wanting to just reach out to him as the tips of your fingers teemed with the longing you felt in your chest. "James," you began, your voice hushed. "It's not all your fault."
You meant it. To try and say to yourself that you had no part in all the confusion between the two of you would be a blatant lie, one that you couldn't let James go on believing, especially not with the pained look on his face.
He only shook his head at you. "It is," he insisted. "And here you go, being perfect towards me when I don't deserve it." A muscle worked overtime in his jaw. "Marlene was right. I was being selfish, and petty, and a lot of other things, but most importantly, I wasn't being a good friend." He paused, a grieving confliction tugging at his brow. "That's ... that's not what friends do."
You went still then too, the word 'friend' hanging in the air between you with a weight that only made you tired. The truth was that cobwebs had grown in the house where you'd fostered that unforgiving title, and it felt like some intangible force had locked you both inside with it blindly.
"Yeah, well," you began, your voice small, "we've been doing plenty of things that friends don't do, lately.Like you said, we kissed, right?" You let out a breathy sound like a laugh that lacked any joy, and the way James's eyes flickered up at you knocked the rest of the air right out of you.
"About that," he began hesitantly, and you could tell he was thinking about both the night it'd happened and that morning when you'd fought, just like you were. "I know you don't want that to mean anything, so it- ... it doesn't have to. Even if I want it to. Because it doesn't matter what I want—what matters to me is you."
You were thankful you had the couch next to you to brace a hand on, because you'd never felt so swept up by a conversation and you weren't sure how much longer you could stand the way your heart was nagging at you.
"You were right," swore James, but the slight shake of his eyes back and forth on your face didn't look as adamant as he sounded. "It's not fair for me to expect something from you when you already got over me."
The words you'd shouted at him in Hogsmeade that morning sounded foreign and wrong coming from his lips, and you knew the months of dishonesty that laced them like you knew the back of your hand.
"And it's too late now, I get that." His voice went from deep and determined to on the cusp of breaking, and it killed you. "I just want to know that you're happy, and if being happy means being with Vance instead of me, then ... I can deal with that."
You watched as he swallowed, like he was forcing the words to come from his lips even if it pained him. The way he hadn't broken eye contact with you the whole while was starting to make your head spin.
Your blinking sped up, maybe holding back the emotion you knew you was fighting to come out, and you whispered, "James."
Maybe you hadn't been loud enough, or maybe he just knew you'd try to disagree with him again, but he only continued determinedly at you.
"I know I probably went and ruined your chances with Vance, like an idiot, but I'm going to do whatever it takes to get you another date with him." He nodded at you once firmly, and within a second he was standing up, taking an intentional step forward. "Hell, I'll even go talk to him right now and-"
"James," you called again, louder this time. "Stop."
You put a hand out and it landed on his arm softly but firmly, and all you could was pray you could find the right words to say to him as he stared at you, level with you now in an unsteadying way.
"You didn't ruin my chances with Sebastian. It wouldn't have worked out regardless, even if I'd wanted it to. Because being with him isn't what I want." You shook your head, recalling back what James had said to you only moments before. "He wouldn't have made me happy." You sounded desperate now. "He's not you."
James stilled, his glistening eyes the only thing showing movement as they danced across your face intensely, though you saw them widen with something bright like hope. "What?"
The confusion of the word that he'd practically whispered out unspeakably attested to how you felt yourself, the terrain of the land you were exploring right there and then with James uncharted and rocky. You pushed on, knowing there was no going back now.
"Marlene wasn't completely right, James. She only said all of those things because I'd spent all this time trying to convince her—and myself—that I didn't still have feelings for you. But I do, clearly." You tipped your head down for a moment in exasperation and exhaustion, willing yourself to keep going. "Everyone can see it. All of our friends. Hell, even Sebastian could see it." You laughed, though your eyes were growing blurry. "So for me to try to push those feelings down any longer would just be lying to you and to myself." You let out an exasperated breath. "And I'm so sick of lying."
Your shoulders sunk as you stood there, a steadily shrinking distance between you and James that was both comforting and daunting to you. You couldn't do anything but watch as James's face stilled and then shifted as he thought, studying your own face in a way that made you conscious of every shift in your expression.
"I just," he began, and then raked a hand through his hair. "Why did you feel like you needed to hide how you felt in the first place?"
You felt your mouth go dry at the question—one you knew came only out of a desperate curiosity and nothing else—and your mind began spinning. The last few years of your friendship seemed to swirl in your head, flickering in and out of focus as you tried to come up with an answer.
"I-" you began, willing yourself to say something, anything at all. "I was scared." The words rang true so much that they made your heart pinch. "Scared that you wouldn't feel the same and I'd go and ruin everything. That I'd lose you."
James's hands lifted up from his sides like he wanted to reach out to you, and he did. He took your hand in his, grasping lightly at your fingertips in a touch that steadied you and made you feel lightheaded at the same time. He shook his head at you with a firm hold in his brow.
"You could never lose me."
His lips were parted, and his hazel eyes glistened over in the low common room lighting like the thought of your suggestion was painful enough on its own. Looking at him then, his face lined with years of a comforting, steadying familiarity, you knew deep in your chest that what he said was true. But that didn't alter all that you'd felt for the past number of years.
"It's not just that," you said, looking down at his hand that held yours and blinking away the guilt that crept into your stomach, because it wasn't James's fault that you had felt this way. "Even in Hogsmeade, James." Your voice was becoming unsteady again and it only frustrated you more. "What if everything you said you felt for me was just some spur-of-the-moment thing from some kiss? What if you didn't feel the same way a week from now? Or a month? I knew I wouldn't be able to get over that fear. Especially when I'd been hiding how I felt from you for years. And then there were your feelings for Lily to think about and ... I don't know."
You trailed off, finally able to stop yourself. You felt petty, so petty, because you were so close to getting what you knew your heart wanted, but you felt the insistent need to ruin things for yourself and think of every way things could go wrong. You'd never felt closer to James then, but also never farther away. All you could do was stand there and wait for him to say something, anything.
James stayed unmoving for a beat staring at you, wordlessly taking everything in with a fragility in the air that hallowed your labored breathing. Then he started to shake his head like he was in disbelief. He ran a hand through his brown hair.
"For Merlin's sake."
His voice was low, a mutter, and he stared at the ground for a moment in thought before dropping the hand that once held yours, turning and walking away from you, leaving up the steps to his dorm room. You watched his back as he disappeared, your fingertips feeling cold and empty.
You felt your blinking speed up in a dizzying confusion. You didn't know what had come over you, not even sure exactly what you'd said in all of your desperate rambling that had made him decide to leave, but your vision started to blur even more than it already had until you recognized the wetness forming beside your eyes.
Nothing made sense. Not then, and not in the last twenty-four hours. You moved until you were sitting down on the couch in front of you, feeling lightheaded as the fireplace crackled a few feet away. The light from outside had left with the sun and the room had a comforting kind of warm lighting, though even that did little to soothe you as you sat there with all the unresolved feelings within you.
You were confused and lost and wanted nothing more than to just fix things, but you were even more at a loss for words when you heard quick footsteps coming from the staircase James had left from, and then saw his returning form making its way down the steps.
You turned your head to him swiftly in confusion, following him and his soft but energetic steps as he came to sit next to you, and that was when you noticed he was holding something—a box. One that was tattered on the corners, its black fabric aged and dusting over.
You wiped at your eyes quickly, brows tugging in all your bewilderment as you waited for James to explain.
"I-" he began, and stopped as soon as his eyes focused more on your face. You must've looked as broken as you felt, and at seeing the look on your face, he held one of your hands in his before swiping across your cheek gently with the pad of his thumb.
You felt like wilting under his soft touch that you'd missed more than anything in the confusing weeks, mentally and physically exhausted from everything but still wanting more than anything to understand.
When you looked perhaps more stable, he looked back at the box that he'd set down beside him and placed it on his lap delicately as he spoke, his words echoing out slowly.
"I know you think I've just realized my feelings for you a week ago, and that they came from some kiss at a party. But, you have to believe me when I say that they're so much more than that." He placed the box in your hands, and you took it from him with a note of fragility, resting it atop your legs. His eyes bore into yours, like it would break him if you couldn't understand the words leaving his lips. He took a shaky breath in. "I need you to know, more than anything, that you're everything to me. You always have been."
Your lips began to shake at the earth-shattering words coming from your best friend's lips. "James, what-"
He stopped you with a gesture of his head that told you to look inside the box, and you did. Carefully, you lifted the flimsy cardboard top and placed it to the side, brows pulling together tight and something loud and hearty threatening to pull from your chest. You shook your head as tears began to well over your eyes again as you recognized what James had given you.
The box, the measly and old mess of cardboard and paper, was full of all the letters you'd written to him over the years—all the thank you notes, the letters you'd sent him from that summer and all the past ones—every single one of them. Your eyes raked over each of them when you felt too stunned to use your hands, but your heart still felt touched by the memories of each one all the same. It took everything in you not to release the sob you felt rising in your lungs.
"It's you. It's always been you."
James's eyes never left your face as you took everything in, the look behind them never having seemed so determined, so desperate. But there was something behind the way he looked at you, something so warm and honest, so familiar that you felt ridiculous for never noticing it before. And when your gaze flickered downward for a second in contemplation he tipped his head to follow it endearingly.
"Always," he promised. "Not Evans, not anyone else. I know I'm a bloody idiot, and I know I haven't been great at showing my emotions when it comes to you, but that's because it's you, and you mean everything to me and have since we were kids, and if this can't make you see that then I promise I'll spend every day trying to make up for it, and-"
"James." You stopped him, not knowing how much longer you could take sitting next to him and not getting rid of the frustrated crease between his brows, or how much longer you could ignore the thrum of your heart that called out to him so clearly now.
"Yeah?" he asked, and his eyes were like a deer in headlights. The warmth in their color reflected the simmering warmth from the fireplace, but that didn't compare to the fire that lay behind his gaze.
You placed the box, his box of the last six years of your friendship and then some, atop the couch next to you, and didn't wait another second before engulfing him in a hug. Your body crashed into his as he leaned back against the couch, his hands coming up to embrace you right away, and you heard him breathe a smile by your ear before he laughed, a perfect noise.
You felt like laughing then too, and crying, and everything else, because you couldn't remember the last time you'd gotten to hold him like this without the fear of revealing too much to him nagging at you. Your cheek pressed against his neck, his curls fanned against the top of your head, his hands held you tight, and you never wanted to leave the safety of his arms. Except to do one thing.
You pulled away from the hug and so did James after a second, his eyes wide and glistening but truly happy. He was smiling widely, his lopsided grin appearing after days like the sun after a storm, and you loved the sight more than anything, locking it away in the back of your mind as a memory you'd keep forever, like the box that sat next to you.
You laid a hand on his chest, another on his cheek, and James grasped the one that was flattened on his chest in his own, quickly glancing down at your hand in his like he couldn't believe he was holding it. He pulled you into him with it and leaned his head on yours.
"It's always been you, too," you whispered, and his eyes glanced down at your lips as you said the quiet words that'd been lingering on your lips for much too long. You had to push away your smile because you were aching to just kiss him like you'd wanted to for years. With a courage that could've only come from Godric himself, you finally did.
You leaned in until your lips met, a flutter of skin dancing shyly together until you leaned into him even further, and suddenly it felt like the crash of a wave, and sounded like the earth was moving beneath your feet, the sound of something right—and this time, you knew it felt the same for him too, because you could feel his boyish grin that you'd spent years admiring tugging against your lips.
You were kissing your best friend. For real this time. It felt so impossible for your mind to imagine such a thing, but luckily it didn't have to.
James moved his hands but they never left you, one sliding through your hair smoothly and one delicately holding your waist like you were something fragile. Butterflies fluttered through you at his touch, something familiar but foreign, wrong but also right, and somessilyperfect. You couldn't believe you'd spent all those years just a few words away from getting to feel it, getting to be surrounded by it.
You pulled away after a moment, your lips feeling puffy and burning with the heat of his kiss, but all you could think about was how free you felt, how happy you were that he was finally yours.
James looked down at you, his eyes dancing all across your face and stopping on your lips, and then somehow growing even warmer when they met yours again.
"I can't-" he began with a slight disbelieving shake of his head, voice coming out breathless and dazed as heat flushed into your own cheeks at the sight. "I can't believe..."
You laughed, feeling out of breath too, and adjusted the glasses that now perched crookedly on James's nose in an agonizingly cute way.
"Me neither," you finished for him, because you knew just how he felt, a secret the both of you shared; it was the only secret you still wanted to keep.
And it was a feeling you never wanted to have to live without again. Though now, with him in your arms and his familiar chocolate curls still brushing against your forehead, you knew you would never have to.
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#james potter x reader#it's always been you#childhood best friends to lovers#james potter fanfic#james potter fanfiction#james potter fic#love confessions#james potter#everythingisromant1c#friends to lovers#the marauders#harry potter#aaron taylor johnson#james potter x you#james potter fluff#james potter x y/n#james fleamont potter#chapter 12#last chapter#series#unrequited love#unrequited feelings#slow burn#romantic gestures#sirius black#remus lupin#peter pettigrew#marlene mckinnon#lily evans#the maruaders
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Most I
Read Most here | ~3.9k words
From me: I've been watching sad Instagram reels to feel something so I wanted to just write those feelings out.
Warnings: angsty af. Like you're gonna be sad in this part. It's only some fluff and a lot of love, but it's a lot of angst. Just like an absolute ton of it. Also you're supposed to envision Harry as a firefighter so you have to deal with that at the same time.
Summary: She was his soulmate when he didn’t believe in them. He was the love of her life–the one she planned to write about. But was soulmates going to be enough?
“Hi baby,” her giggle was infectious. The kind of laugh that sounded like music and felt like sunshine. He didn’t even need to see her to know there was a smile on her face. The very same smile that had been his favorite one to see since they were young. Only recently did it turn into the one that he loved so much. Well, at least he could admit how much he loved it openly. It made his own smile appear; just knowing when he turned around, he was going to see those pretty lips, her straight teeth (although when he envisioned it, he still remembered it before she had braces; teeth just slightly crooked at the cutest angle—but he would never tell her that). The word baby was for him. She was in his heart. So completely, so wholly. He loved the way the word baby sounded in her voice. How it left her smiling lips. He had dreamed about it for ages. Since he was old enough to name that she really was his crush.
But in the end, he didn’t even have to tell her he liked the name baby. It was just the one she chose.
Like she knew that’s what he wanted.
“Hey kitten,” he chuckled, smiling over his shoulder as she approached. She wrapped her arms around his waist from behind. She nuzzled her face against his back. His shirt smelled so intoxicatingly good—like him. He was warm, perfect. He continued his conversation with Niall. Resting his hand on top of hers, settled on the front of his stomach, right above his belt. She stayed glued to him. Niall hardly paid any attention to her. Not in a mean way, of course; no, she was simply there because she was supposed to be. She was a permanent fixture—no, an extension of Harry’s body. When she wasn’t around, it was the first thing anyone asked. Where was she? Was she okay? She liked to be thought of as a package deal. Even her mom, for all her faults, always wondered where Harry was when he wasn’t there. It was like he was the oxygen in the air and when he wasn’t around it was hard for her to breathe.
She loved Harry. She was so in love with him, she thought you could take a sample of her blood and find love for him in the cells at a molecular level. Loved him beyond description. She didn’t think it was possible to love someone that much until she did. It was the stuff of dreams and romance novels. Every time he looked at her, she was overcome with the feeling like he never wanted to stop looking at her.
Harry truly was in love with her. Astronomically in love with her. He thought he would need to create a new unit of measurement just to explain how vast and deeply he loved her. But there wasn’t any justice for it. He simply loved her. Like his life depended on it. He loved her more than he could describe. More than anyone could ever really witness.
He encouraged all her dreams and ambitions throughout the years. When she wanted to be an astronaut he stayed up until three in the morning researching workout routines for them to practice in his backyard so he could help train her for a life on the space station. The week she wanted to be a baker was spent experimenting with flour and sugar. Failing miserably when they set the smoke alarm off so many times that his mum insisted that they take a break.
But it was her writing that he encouraged more than anything else.
He didn’t care what she chose to write. He read it all. Essays, articles, love stories, a grocery list turned into poetry when it came from her pen. He bought her notebooks upon notebooks for birthdays and Christmases. When she was feeling upset, he never brought her flowers; a new pen and notebook, that was all she needed.
People who didn’t know them well, said they were crazy. Falling in love at a young age like that. It wasn’t a good idea. Harry was going to leave for college a year before her and it seemed doomed before it started. But to her it didn’t matter. Because each of those notebooks that Harry never opened without her permission, never strayed from the page she let him read, all were inscribed on the inside front cover with a heart she had drawn and written their two names inside. Like she was going to write their very future into existence.
Yes, Harry loved her, but it was more than that. There wasn’t anyone sweeter. No one was prettier—inside or out. Her kindness was so touching he couldn’t believe someone like her was in love with him some days. It seemed unfair. If there was a perfect person, it was Harry. She was sure.
Harry didn’t believe in soulmates. But whatever she was and how she fit into his life, he was certain it was as close to a soulmate as he would ever get.
So finally, when Harry was finally exhausted from waiting, the day before his last year of school started—before he would be going off and applying to universities, he needed her to know. “You know I’m in love with you, right?” He asked, point-blank.
She smiled.
That gorgeous, perfect smile that melted him right to his core.
“Yes,” she whispered, and she opened one of the notebooks that were stacked beside her bed, all the ones from over the years that she had hidden exactly what she wanted on the inside front cover. “I know.”
Harry saw the hearts, their names.
She was his soulmate. Whether he liked it or not.
So, when they held hands in the school hallways, went to astronomy class together, and sat so close to one another at lunch and in study hall, no one really paid any mind to them. It seemed like most everyone already thought they were a couple, so their adorableness didn’t change how anyone perceived one another. No one noticed how in love Harry was with her because it seemed like nothing had changed at all.
No one cared that she loved Harry with every piece of her heart. Every part of her mind and soul because it seemed like she always had.
Well.
Almost everyone.
*
Their love wasn’t without fault. Harry worried about the future, if she would grow tired of him because he wanted nothing more than to live in this town of theirs, the place where he met the love of his life and take care of it in thanks for bringing her to him.
“I can write from anywhere, Harry,” she reminded him. “Actually, I would go nowhere to be with you,” she smiled. It was corny. A poem she would probably jot down later before she fell asleep.
“Y’would go nowhere,” he repeated. That dimpled smile of his made her heartbeat twice as fast. His hands slid around her waist. It nearly made her shiver even though it wasn’t the first time he touched her, and it wouldn’t be the last.
She nodded; her hands linked behind his neck. His forehead pressed to hers and he brushed the tip of his nose against hers. His mouth felt like a magnet, and he was going to draw her in whether she wanted to be drawn in or not (but she did—oh, did she want). “Nowhere with you seems like heaven.”
“When y’write your first poetry book, are y’gonna dedicate it to me?”
She nodded. “Absolutely.”
“Yeah? Y’really gonna dedicate it t’nobody?”
“You’re not a nobody,” she rolled her eyes.
“M’not going anywhere. M’jus’ a nobody from nowhere.”
“Harry,” she giggled. “You’re not a nobody... this isn’t nowhere. You’re... everywhere. And you’ll always be my somebody,” she promised.
Her lips were touching his. Not quite kissing, but as she nodded, they brushed in a half-kiss that she didn’t have enough words to adequately describe the feeling and how it would put any full kiss written by any other author to shame. “Think I want t’have your body all t’myself,” he pulled her closer, somehow. His body was so warm and when he smiled, his mouth curved upwards made her lips follow his. She couldn’t take it a moment longer. She sank into the kiss, feeling like the oxygen was almost too pure for her. Leaving her breathless but wanting more of it all the same.
He was her first kiss, her first poem, her first love, and her first everything. There wasn’t an inch of skin that hadn’t been touched by him. So really, the poems, the stories, the writing came naturally. Harry was her muse. There was nothing else to do but write.
*
But her own insecurities in her writing abilities and her appearance made her nervous that she would hold Harry back.
Harry wanted to be a firefighter for their sweet little town; and she wasn’t oblivious, he had the body for it. She joked with him that he was going to sell thousands of dollars’ worth of calendars when the time came. “Are y’going t’be the one buying thousands of dollars’ worth of calendars?” He chuckled.
“Obviously,” she rolled her eyes. He kissed every inch of her face until she giggled more and more.
“Kitten?” he whispered.
“Yes?”
“M’gonna buy thousands of dollars’ worth of y’books.”
“With my calendar money?”
He tickled her until she squealed.
Harry was beautiful. More beautiful than she felt on most days, and it pained her sometimes to look in the mirror. But it always seemed like Harry knew when those days hit her hardest. “Do y’know you are the most beautiful person I know?” He whispered to her, as if it were a secret. But he would have shouted it from the rooftops. He showed all their friends the pictures he had taken of her and put them in their group chat and reminded them to tell her how pretty she looked. It made her giggle and shy from the attention. He would brush his fingers along her cheek, “So, so pretty,” he reminded her. “Should be illegal t’look at you for this long. Hogging all your beauty t’myself.”
But they always reassured one another that this was it. She was his soulmate—even when he didn’t believe in them. He was the love of her life—the one she planned to write about until she couldn’t physically write anymore.
It helped that people like Eleanor, Louis, Niall, Sarah, and Mitch, all assured her too that no one loved anyone as much as Harry loved her. Everyone loved them together. It wasn’t close to the amount they loved each other, but it was a good amount—one that suggested everyone knew they were meant for each other.
Almost everyone.
*
Lauren was the same year as she was. She was popular, smart, insanely beautiful. In another dimension, she was sure Harry was meant to be with Lauren. But they were a good pair. Lauren was kind and almost always worked with her on school projects. Arguably one of her closest friends outside her main group of friends she shared with Harry.
When they were out and about, Harry watched out for the girls in the group nearly as much as he watched out for the girl that made his heart stutter. He kept spare hair ties around his wrist for when drinking at parties got to be too much and he worried their hair would fall into the toilet. “Harry, can you come get Lo and I?” She asked once Harry picked up at the other end. It was Harry’s least favorite kind of call. The kind he knew Lauren had dragged her to a party that was too much. It made his heartbeat faster, worried beyond belief until he saw that sweet smile holding her friend’s hair back as she threw up in the bushes. “Can you help me get her into bed?” Of course he would. He would do anything she asked.
Harry noticed the way Lauren’s grip tightened around his neck as he held her and carefully placed her into bed. Out of the kindness of his heart, he ignored it. For Lauren’s sake, for his sake, and of course the sake of the pretty girl whose concern for her friend grew as she gathered items needed to cure a hangover.
*
Lauren was in love with Harry. Had been for years. But it couldn’t even come close to her and her love for Harry. Not in any way, shape, or form. Lauren adored her friend, because how could she not? She was too sweet for words. But there was a part of her, a gnawing, growing part of her that wanted her friend out of the picture. She told herself all she needed was a chance, but it didn’t seem doable. They were inseparable. There was no way she could tear them apart. It was impossible.
Or was it?
*
“Harry?” Lauren asked. She was smiling at her phone again. The way she always did when Harry texted her. During the week, it was a little hard to see one another—even though Harry was commuting to the local university just a half hour drive away and they were still in town. So, Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays were meant for dates and kisses and being so obsessed with one another, it would probably make anyone want to throw up.
Especially if they were jealous.
“Yeah, he’s out early. Wanted to know if we needed anything for our study session.”
Lauren felt a crack in her plan. They were really too sweet. Both of them.
“Do you ever… worry about Harry?” Lauren asked.
She frowned. “Yeah, like every day.”
“No,” Lauren felt a stab of hatred for herself as she pressed. Of course, her friend would say something sickeningly kind like that. Of course, she worried about Harry. “No like… him at university.”
“What do you mean?” She asked innocently. The innocence in her voice was sincere. Genuinely asking her friend what she meant. Worry coated her face. Was there something she missed? Should she have been worrying about Harry more?
“Uh… just… forget it,” Lauren shook her head. “It’s stupid.”
That was going to be the end of it. If it was, maybe Harry would have fared better. Maybe it wouldn’t have led to this horrible moment. Left wondering and aching and wishing.
But she was nothing if not the best and most fantastic friend of all.
“Lo, are you sure? You seem… nervous.”
So, she continued. Planted the tiny seed of doubt. “It’s just… Harry’s been with you his whole life and he’s made it well known he won’t be leaving. So, do you ever feel like you should… let him be free to experience more? I don’t know… I just… I think I would worry if it were me.”
That was all it took.
The self-doubt was so easy. It made so much sense coming from her mouth. Harry did deserve more. She thought that on a regular normal day.
Staying close to home wasn’t going to make Harry’s life any richer. He wasn’t staying in a dorm. He wasn’t going to be studying abroad or anything like that. A degree in psychology to help as much as he humanly could. Training to be a firefighter the moment he finished his degree. He would love his life and living here.
But what if he deserved more?
*
Harry’s house was like her second home. She rarely knocked—only if she was unsure if anyone was home. If the car was in the driveway, she made her way in.
Except today. Because today, Anne’s porch didn’t feel like home. The steps that made her trip and fall on Halloween when Harry tended to her like he planned on being a doctor. It solidified the picture that he would be a fireman, an amazing one at that. But he would have been great at anything he set his mind to. The flower garden where she and Harry found a bird’s nest after a bad storm. The study sessions and poems that she scribbled on the porch where Anne would bring them lemonade and cookies.
It was one of her favorite places on earth.
But it wasn’t today.
She knocked.
Harry pulled the door out of the way. “Hey baby,” he pecked her cheek, oblivious to everything she felt and how she sounded. He was in his own happy world. Nothing was wrong. He wasn’t told that she was less when Harry needed more. He didn’t notice she knocked. That she hadn’t toed over the threshold. “How was school and work? Are y’tired?”
“Harry,” she whispered.
“I was thinking we could order in and watch a movie.”
It’s not fair.
“Harry,” she repeated.
“I think pizza—oh we had pizza two days ago. Maybe Chinese?”
It’s. Not. Fair.
“Harry.”
Finally, he noticed she hadn’t moved much beyond the doorway while he was rushing about. He turned to her finally. Noting her crestfallen face, the way her eyes were bloodshot, and she refused to look him in the eye.
“Hey, kitten,” he frowned and moved toward her. “S’matter, love?” He asked. “Did y’have a bad day? See a sad video?”
It pained her to no end that he knew her so well that a sad video could have been the culprit for her sadness on a normal day. But this wasn’t a normal day. This was the day she was going to break her own heart.
“I uh…” she swiped at her eye.
“Kitten, baby,” he cooed and reached for her arm gently, but she pulled away. “Hey, what—”
“I think I’m gonna…” her throat hurt. Like the words were burning her esophagus like they weren’t supposed to come out. “I want to go away,” she whispered. That was at least in part true. She did want to go away. Far, far away so she wouldn’t feel the hurt like she was in that moment. “For school.”
There was a pang of frustration that went through him. Not because he was mad at her. No, he was going to miss her, that was it. But her success, her happiness, all of it was more important than a few hundred miles. Or even thousands. Harry sighed, wiped a hand over his face, and nodded. It would be hard. Long distance would be really hard. “Alright, yeah. Course, baby. Whatever’s best for y’education.”
She shook her head trying to talk herself out of saying it. Or maybe into saying it. It seemed so wrong. So awful. It wasn’t worth it. All this hurt. She hadn’t even started really. She could stop right then. But she looked at him. Looked at his kind, worried face. The way he looked at her when she had a stomachache or a headache. When she smacked her head on the corner of a table she was cleaning under or when she fell off her bike when she was young. “It’s… it’s really far away, Harry,” she reminded him. Maybe she wouldn’t have to say it. Wouldn’t have to do the hard part. He would just know, he would agree.
“Yeah… yeah, it is. But s’okay,” it sounded like he was trying to convince himself. Just a minor hiccup. “I’ll come t’you every weekend. And there will be holidays. M’sure your mum will want y’home and—”
His poor heart. He’s got no idea I’m about to ruin everything.
“Harry,” she swallowed. “It’s… it’s too far,” it wasn’t even a whisper.
Harry frowning was her least favorite thing. It made it all so much harder. “Too far for what, kitten?” He asked almost rhetorically.
Her inhale of breath was shaky. Like it was hurting her to breathe. Everything hurt. Every inch of her body. Like she had been hit by a car or had fallen from a tree. It wasn’t fair. Harry was oxygen. He always had been for as long as she had known him. Now it was hurting her to be in the same room as him. “For us,” she croaked.
It felt like the whole world had shifted. Flipped on its axis. He remembered hearing about it in their astronomy class. She was sitting right beside him. He wanted to ask her if she remembered because it wasn’t supposed to be like that. It was supposed to happen gradually, in hundreds of thousands of years. No one was supposed to notice. But Harry did. He noticed immediately.
He scoffed and looked at her like she was insane. Like it was a mean joke. She wasn’t mean so where had this come from? The tears were a nice touch. Realistic even. It felt terrible to look at her in such a way, but surely it was only the natural reaction when someone he loved just caused the magnetic field to flip the entire globe. “Baby, what are y’saying?” He asked. It didn’t really make sense and so his only option was to question her. She covered her mouth releasing a sob that he hadn’t ever heard come from her mouth. Not when her childhood dog died. Not when her mom got in a scary car accident and started losing her mind just enough to make her anxious and worried. Not when she got a terrible grade on her math test or hurt her ankle in soccer. There wasn’t a moment he could compare it to. There was no grief she had ever felt that elicited such a sound. Harry reached for her again, instinctively, his hand touching her upper arm. She flinched. Like it stung.
Like it hurt.
In hindsight, it was the last time he touched her, and she flinched away.
“Baby,” his throat felt tight. Nothing in his brain was connecting—the pattern wasn’t something he had encountered before. She didn’t flinch at his touch. The words didn’t make sense. Not from her mouth. What did any of that mean? “Kitten…”
“I’m sorry Harry. It’s too much. We’re too young and…” she took a heaving breath. One that shook her whole body. The only thing Harry could think about was holding her. It didn’t matter that his heart was splintering into pieces. She was in pain, and he wanted to cure it and he wanted to hold her to do it. “I’m sorry, Harry. I’m so sorry,” she left the doorway without another word. Not a single touch, nor kiss. When was the last time he kissed her? Oh, he was so lucky his class finished early, and it was the night before. A goodnight kiss when everything was happy and wonderful. He had an early day. So, he told her he loved her and went to bed. It seemed like a lifetime ago. Like the world had tipped and opened a blackhole to this terrible dimension.
“Harry?” Anne asked, coming from the kitchen. He was staring at the door. Where the love of his life had previously stood. Harry was only 19, but he was never surer of how she fit in his life. “Are you alright?”
“No, not at all,” he croaked, and the tears flooded his vision and down his face. There was nothing else to be said.
--
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