#old tag: these two pic were back to back when I was searching for references on Pinterest
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Like brother like sister
#accidentally deleted the other post#oops#anyway it’s back!#old tag: these two pic were back to back when I was searching for references on Pinterest#tmnt 2012#tmnt 2k12#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt raphael#tmnt raph 2012#raphael hamato#tmnt karai#hamato karai#karai hamato
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Hey so that Dainsleif quest huh 👀
[Spoilers for those who haven't played it yet ofc]
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These are just some disorganized initial thoughts for your consideration:
So I'm pretty sure his "travel companion" that he keeps mentioning is our twin
Does that mean our twin has gone to the exact same places as we've been going?? Dainsleif seemed to be familiar with all the locations we visited in Mondstadt but I suppose that could've been from an even earlier journey
And the possibility that the Abyss is trying to mislead us bc we hadn't encountered any abyss mages since Dvalin 🤔🤔🤔 what do they want??? We know (kinda) that our twin is watching our progress and that they're the prince/princess of the Abyss so like are they trying to keep us from getting in the way of their plans so as not to accidentally hurt us? Though something tells me we're gonna get tangled up in it one way or the other lmao
Dainsleif said that his goal is to oppose the Abyss so perhaps he's got his own secret plans to try to stop our twin (as is also supported by what he said at the end of the mortal travails video about proving ourselves worthy of stopping "her"/Lumine probably)
Also turns out I'd been pronouncing his name wrong the whole time lmao I had been saying dains-leaf instead of dains-lif
No Vision as confirmed by his full character model
Also his eyepatch is more of a phantom of the opera mask lmao
Important observation he looks like post timeskip Dimitri from a distance when I had to meet him in Dvalin's Lair I legit thought he was Dimitri for a sec XD
Anyway those were my thoughts about the new quest lmao my internet was cutting out the whole time while I was trying to play like dsfkdksjf pls I just wanted to talk to blond eyepatch man
Important part of this post:
I took a lot of pictures of Dainsleif if you want to use them as references (or appreciation). The pictures are under the read more tag so if you don’t want spoilers, don’t read anything and skip to the read more.
Also, he calls you and your sibling “idiots” through money.
He asks for 500 mora and (this is probably just a coincidence but considering Zhongli tips Xiangling 888 mora I’m sus). The number 250 [二百五] or ( èr bǎi wǔ) means “idiot”.
If someone calls you 250, they can say (nǐ shì wǔ bǎi) or “You are [250]”. But if you give someone 500, this can be taken as saying two people are stupid (250 + 250 = 500). I mean, that’s probably not how it works but I think it’s funny to imagine Dainsleif being too polite to call us stupid.
---
I know right? When I saw the leak for it and seeing it confirmed in patch notes, I was so confused. Wha-Why are you here so early? I wasn’t expecting you for another 5 years at least. I’m happy to see you and your beautiful model in game but at the same time I was so worried that we were going to get crumbs of interactions. Same thing with Guizhong in Zhongli’s story quest. Genshin please...finish your stories (that’s fucking hilarious coming from me considering I still have a part 2 to Childe that I need to write), but I’m honestly just happy that he’s in the game. But yes 👀👀 more lore food.
You know, I was talking about the archons a bit with @maagdalen and, I may have been misunderstanding or reading the wrong message, but they brought up the idea that what if the archons’ personality is based on their regions country's? So for example, Venti’s personality adopts the German mentality because Mondstadt was modelled after Germany? Obviously, I have no idea if that’s true because I’m not from or am German but in the context of Liyue and Zhongli. I can definitely see some sort of connection.
But some food for thought:
“But cyro archon is very viable since she's suppose to be a kind hearted person that needed to be cold for the sake of freedom. or peace. something like that.”
“Sorry, but this is stupidly Russian style. No matter what you say, people will always be dissatisfied. Of course it's not that bad...but it's something to think about.“
But yess, @svnflowery said the same thing. That Dainsleif was Lumine’s “guide” the same way Paimon is our guide. I actually think that’s an interesting idea. That Lumine has gone to the exact same places as we’ve been through. It actually makes me wonder (since we can play as both her and Aether), that Lumine went through the same story line as Aether. She met Venti, Zhongli, everything that’s happening right now. She’s already been through, then when she reached the Khaenri’ah chapter she failed. So she decided to spin the clock back and change destiny. I mean, this is me spit balling and I don’t think this happened but it’s something to think about.
You know funny enough, hasn’t Venti been asleep for a while? Either way, he doesn’t really strike me as the type that truly wants to be an Archon. He says in his voicelines as well that “that’s a problem for Mondstadt to deal with”. So it would be easier for the Abyss Order to mess some things up. While Zhongli has been alive for 6000 years and I highly doubt Abyss Order can do anything to him haha. If we’re going on that “Lumine has already been through this journey” she could be trying to re-make or lead us on the same path.
I wouldn’t be surprised if Dainsleif was our guide, then when Lumine spun the clock back and aligned herself with the abyss, that’s when they split. That could be a reason why he’s trying to oppose the abyss order but really I think it’s because the Abyss Order’s goal is to basically set the world on fire (or something like that). I always pronounce character names wrong and I don’t understand why people make such a big deal out of it. You know who I’m talking about, my pronunciation isn’t completely shit to the point you don’t know. So why do you keep yelling at me??
Also. The most important part of his quest was it was “Aether’s version” of the “We will be reunited” trailer.
It even showed the crushed dandelion flower and the ruin guard footprints. IT’S OUR SISTER.
I knoww, I was searching for his vision and got weird pics but that’s alright, I LOWKEY HATE THE OPERA MASK SO MUCH. GIVE ME ACTUAL MASK. THERE GOES THE “SEPERATE COLOURED EYE” ART OF KHAENRIAH PEOPLE. Yo, knock off Dimitri let’s go.
I love Dainslief’s english voice but I hate Xiao’s en voice. What a dilemma. I usually play in chinese but wow does Dainslief sound old. Jp is slightly better but I hear grandpa vibes. Korean isn’t bad and I actually don’t mind korean xiao so korean we shall go. It’s weird. I like Dainsleif english voices, Xiao chinese voice, paimon korean voice haha. Jp is usually just good all around but I have preferences. But tyty for telling me your thoughts! I’d love to hear about the Xiao quest that just dropped. Beautiful boy
sweats
yeah about that...xiao scammed me. I wonder if his speech changes based on what you say. i kind of doubt it though.
I’m looking at his outfit from every angle while Xiao stays pretty in the back.
I like that you can see his magic arm there.
While on this side you can’t.
I swear this is for research. IM TRYING TO SEE IF HE HAS A VISION. IM INNOCENT!!
he also has some sort of weird...blue thingy on his foot?
Im using Xiao as a personfication of me BUT TELL ME YOUR SECRETS
#genshin#genshin impact#genshin lore#genshin impact lore#genshin spoilers#genshin impact spoilers#genshin khaenri'ah#genshin impact khaenri'ah#genshin lumine#genshin impact lumine#genshin aether#genshin impact aether#genshin dainsleif#genshin impact dainsleif#lumine#aether#dainsleif#genshin 1.3#genshin impact 1.3
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Not Nineteen Forever (12) (Branjie/Scyvie/Ninex)- Ortega
a/n: hey friends! here’s chapter 12 of Not Nineteen Forever, i’m sorry it’s so late but i want to thank everyone who waited patiently and was so polite and encouraging while waiting. it really made me smile! remember i always love and am so grateful for sweet comments either on AQ, through reblog, or on my blog, so keep them coming bc they motivate me no end!! hope u all enjoy this chapter (p.s. finally accepted the ninex in this fic is not in any way background any more xo) xxxxxxx
trigger warning: alcohol n naughty texts xo
please note: this fic contains young adults often behaving in irresponsible/unadvisable ways with regards to alcohol, drugs and sex. if you are someone who feels as if they could be heavily influenced by fic and incorporate what happens in the plot into ur own life, pls steer clear!
summary: Brooke, Yvie and Nina are three flatmates who forged a friendship in their first year of university and picked up some other waifs and strays along the way. Now in their final year, there are feelings that need to be unravelled and confessions to be made whilst navigating drunk nights, hungover mornings, takeaways, group chats, library meetups, cafe gossiping, and the small matter of getting a degree.
last chapter: Monet and Nina continued to be adorable, Yvie and Scarlet continued to be cute, but Brooke wasn’t sure if she wanted the same for her and Vanessa.
this chapter: there’s library woes, a flat party, a lilac-haired, tattooed bombshell, and Yvie confides in Scarlet.
***
Scarlet let a long puff of air out of her cheeks and blinked at her laptop, bored. She’d been so eager for Uni to start back again, so excited to get back to the city and see her friends that she slightly forgot about the whole academic aspect of everything. Lectures had started that week and in between trying to force four different modules’ worth of information into her head she had caught up with Vanjie, chatting before, after and in between lectures when they could. It was interesting, Scarlet thought. Before Christmas she could never get her to shut up about Brooke and how things were going with her but ever since the holidays it seemed as if Brooke was a subject to be avoided. Scarlet knew something must have changed but she didn’t want to push Vanjie for information if she wasn’t ready to share it. They still seemed to be together, anyway, even if things seemed a little strained.
At least she could say that wasn’t the case for her and Yvie. After many long evening Skype sessions during the holidays, the pair of them had decided that they couldn’t bear to be apart a moment longer and so Scarlet had taken the six hour train to go and stay with her girlfriend at her family home for a few days. She had been a bag of nerves at the thought of meeting Yvie’s family, but her Mum had been lovely (and seemingly just relieved that her daughter had settled down), her Dad had been welcoming, if a little quiet (“He’s under strict instructions not to speak because every time he opens his mouth he embarrasses me”), and the brothers and sisters that were still at home and not out somewhere or back to uni themselves were kind and friendly. In the three days they spent together, Scarlet and Yvie went for cold, crisp walks along the beach, curled up on Yvie’s old battered leather sofa the family had had since she was small and watched Disney films, gone ice skating, and looked out over Yvie’s city on a rickety ferris wheel that had looked as if it would take one good sneeze to knock it down.
But all that movie-screen romance was behind her now, as the most romantic Scarlet had been with Yvie in the week since they’d been back at uni was a Tesco Finest £10 meal deal cooked in Yvie’s flat and then watched in front of the TV as a perfect accompaniment to Coronation Street. They were both busy and waiting for their academic life to slow down a little again. The same could be said for their whole friendship group, really. The whole gang hadn’t done anything all together since their Christmas dinner, and Scarlet was itching for a night out where she could get absolutely off her face and forget that she was working towards the degree that would define the rest of her life. Sighing again and feeling the words on her laptop merge into a big blur, Scarlet looked up at the big clock on the wall. Five o'clock. She turned to Akeria who was sat at the desk beside her. She and Silky had come to join her mid-study, the latter having been dragged into the library by her flatmate because she still hadn’t handed in an essay that had been due since before Christmas and Akeria was quite frankly concerned.
“Akeria,” Scarlet whispered, the other girl quickly finishing a sentence she was working on, turning away from her laptop towards Scarlet and pushing her reading glasses up the bridge of her nose. “I want a night out. This is shit.”
“This is what we signed up for, baby,” Akeria gave a small laugh and shrugged, turning back to her laptop. Akeria’s dissertation wasn’t due until May but she had already started writing it, which struck the fear of God into the majority of their friendship group and made them all feel like slackers. “This is uni. This is our fuckin’ degree, girl.”
“You’re really making me feel better,” Scarlet rolled her eyes, Akeria giving another laugh under her breath.
“Hey,” Silky said from her position at the desk across from them, her voice entirely at speaking-pitch and causing a few heads to turn their way. “What’re you hoes talkin’ about? I want in.”
“We’re bitching about you,” Akeria deadpanned, tapping away at her keyboard.
“Fuck off, Kiki.”
“I want a night out,” Scarlet hissed over to her as quietly as she could. “But Little Miss Law Degree wants to stay in the library from dusk til dawn every evening until she graduates.”
Scarlet’s face lit up as Silky bellowed a laugh so loud it caused the girl beside her to put a set of earphones in. Looking at Akeria and hoping she hadn’t been offended, she was relieved to see the other girl giving her a wry smile.
“This bitch can be so savage when she wants to be, Jesus. Ouch. No, I’m just sayin’! This was what we chose to do, so quit complaining,” Akeria rolled her eyes, leaned back in her chair and stretched. “That being said…I do think I’ve earned a night out.”
“Well me fuckin’ too, bitch!” Silky exclaimed incredulously, Scarlet laughing in spite of herself.
“How much have you written, Silk?” she asked, the girl opposite looking down at her laptop, clicking a few times, then looking back up to the girls in front of her.
“You know what…it don’t matter how many words I’ve done, it’s the level of mental energy I have needed to use in order to-”
“Silky, how many words,” Akeria demanded, fixing her with a stare that looked as if it could slice her in half.
“Ninety-four.”
“Jesus Christ on a crystal meth binge,” Akeria sighed, Scarlet letting out a splutter beside her. Silky looked at them both pleadingly.
“Hey, now don’t make me feel bad! We only been in here-”
“An hour and a quarter,” Akeria stared at her.
Silky threw her hands up. “Well I been doing readings an’ shit! Do you know how hard it is to get any articles that have the exact quote ‘Boris Johnston is a piece of dog shit’? Fuckin’ hard!”
“Why the hell are you looking for that?” Akeria blurted out, unable to keep herself from laughing. Scarlet was laughing so hard she thought she would pass out.
“Because, bitch! I want to use that exact wording in my essay but I need some academic shit to back me up.”
“Fuck me.”
“To be fair, that is the worst,” Scarlet shrugged, not wanting Silky to feel too demoralised. “Searching for three hours to find one reference that can back up one of your points. Like, why can’t you just make the point because you want to? You know? Why is your opinion only valid if it’s been previously thought up by a white man in a suit?"
"Very profound,” Silky nodded emphatically. “Anyway, this bitch needs to get her drink on. I’m going to ask the girls."
As she watched Silky pick up her phone, Scarlet was reminded to check her own. She’d deliberately sat on it and put it on flight mode in an attempt to force herself to do work. Now, she felt as if she could excuse a small break. Turning off flight mode, she watched as a small flood of notifications came through. There had been fifteen new group chat messages, Nina had tagged them all in a meme, and she had two messages from Yvie. She checked the latter first, wondering if she would ever get tired of the feeling of her heart soaring like a balloon every time she saw, heard or spoke Yvie’s name.
Y: if i told u i was considering buying a set of faux-leather underwear would that be weird or a turn-on
Y: also that lasagne is even better on the second day u need to have some of it when ur round
S: Sorry this took me so long!!!!!! I turned my phone on flight mode in an attempt to get some work done
S: No such luck
S: Leather look underwear is a yes from me but i’m inclined to ask for pics first xoxoxoxoxo
S: Also yes i want lasagne
S: That’s not a euphemism btw i actually really do want some lasagne
Y: 😈
As Scarlet gave a soft laugh to herself, she checked what had been going on on the group chat since she’d been studying. She wondered what exciting plans could have been made, or what drama could have happened, or if anyone had any exciting or interesting news.
Okay Then: oh my god
Kim Kardashian-West: ??????
Okay Then: has anyone seen the state of Simon Cowell’s face
Scarlet gave a colossal roll of her eyes. She should have known that, at times, the groupchat could become one massive shitpost.
Kim Kardashian-West: No??? What’s he done to it?? Has he been in a crash?
Okay Then: he might as fucking well have been
What followed was a picture of what seemed to be a man whose face had been partially melted with a blowtorch, until Scarlet looked closer and realised that it was indeed the TV talent show judge.
mose: Jesus Fucking Christ what’s he done to himself
Scarlet’s bitch: that’s frightening
Okay Then: RIGHT???
Scarlet’s bitch: that’s what i see in the corner of my room when i have sleep paralysis
Kim Kardashian-West: That is TRULY the stuff of nightmares!!!!
Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: Fucking hell Plastique don’t fucking frighten us like that!!!
mose: He must surely see that he looks like shit? Like how could you not?
Okay Then: how can he see anything when his eyebrows are now entirely obscuring his eyes
Kim Kardashian-West: I am actually quite frightened guys
At this point, Scarlet caught up to the current conversation.
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: AS TERRIFYING AS SIMON COWELL’S FACE IS
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: CAN WE TALK BUSINESS FOR A SECOND?
Kim Kardashian-West: Of course!
mose: I’m all business
Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: Sure you are baby xxxxxxx
Scarlet’s Bitch: that is fucking vile keep that shit off the groupchat u big gays
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: YA FAV BITCHES ARE IN THE LIBRARY AND WE ARE GAGGING FOR A NIGHT OUT
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: WE AIN’T HAD ONE IN AGES
Okay Then: yaaaaaaaaaas bitches let’s do it
Okay Then: thursday night fever
Kim Kardashian-West: Well Monet invited me to this flat party she’s hosting tonight
Kim Kardashian-West: I could ask her if you guys could come too?
Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: Omg yes I’m down!
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: YES BITCH FLAT PARTY!!!!
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: AND IF SHE SAYS NO JUST SAY SHE AIN’T GETTIN ANY PUSS FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE
Kim Kardashian-West: SILKY!!!!!!!! THAT IS DISGUSTING!!!
Yvie’s Bitch: We were all thinking it xoxo
Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: AHAHAHAHAHA SILK
Okay Then: YES Scarlet
Kim Kardashian-West: You’re all horrible. And uninvited.
mose: Ninaaaaaa
Okay Then: Nina pls
Scarlet’s Bitch: fuck i’m not even sure i can do tonight ladies
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: YVIE DONT YOU DARE
Scarlet’s Bitch: i’ve got a 9am tomorrow and i want to get that first u know
mose: Yvieeee the last time we were all together was literally over a month ago
Scarlet pouted to herself, disappointed at the thought of Yvie being the only one not out. Suddenly, an idea began to form in her head. Biting back a smile, she took to her chat with Yvie.
S: Yvieeeee
Y: Scarleeeeet
S: Please come to the flat party :(((((((
S: I’ll do anything you want
Y: anything i want?
S: Yesssss
Y: that sounds like a challenge princess
Scarlet crossed her legs and felt herself squeezing her thighs together. Looking around at the rows of silent people, she turned her phone brightness down to make extra sure nobody could see her messages, just in case the conversation turned the way Scarlet thought it was about to.
S: Well it depends on what you want me to do x
Y: wellllll
Y: i’ve been wondering if u can take a strap like a good girl
Scarlet felt briefly as if she’d been shocked by a defibrillator. Yvie always seemed to go from 0 to 100 real fucking quick, and Scarlet couldn’t help but love it.
S: You know I could baby
Y: i know you could, you’re such a good girl
Y: so how about if i come to this party i get to watch u bounce on my dick until u cum all over it
Scarlet could feel her face growing red. She and Yvie had messaged like this before, when they had been at home and miles away from each other and alone and very much not-in-a-public-place, but this was so fucking different.
S: Christ Yves I’m in the library!!!!
Y: shut up u started all this!!
S: Yeah I kinda did
Y: deliberately getting me to tell u what i want to do to u later when ur sitting in public in a fucking silent building
Y: jesus fucking christ Scarlet that’s so hot
Scarlet felt an urgent pulse of heat between her legs and she squirmed in her seat.
S: Where are you just now?
Y: i’m in bed
Y: touching myself at the thought of u sitting absolutely soaking wet and being able to do fuck all about it
S: So you’re coming to the party baby?
Y: how about
Y: if u can get to the flat before i cum i’ll fuck u into the mattress and i’ll come to this party or whatever
Scarlet nearly jammed her fingers in her laptop in her haste to get it shut, wrenched her charger out of its socket so hard it almost broke, and muttered a near-breathless goodbye to a confused Akeria and Silky all in the space of about twenty seconds as she struggled into her coat and sped out into the stairwell.
Five hours later Scarlet had managed to fit a lot in. She’d hurried round to Yvie’s to find her in bed in the black lace underwear she knew drove Scarlet crazy, and they’d fucked twice (fast, rough and passionate then sweet, tender and gentle) before Scarlet had reluctantly dragged herself out of Yvie’s bed to head back to her own flat and get ready for the party. Nobody seemed to know what the dress code was, least of all Nina who had sent about nine different outfit options to the group chat for opinions, so Scarlet settled on a tight black bandage dress that stopped at her calves, with trainers to dress it down a bit. She’d hurriedly munched down a bowl of pasta a la whatever-was-left-in-the-fridge, then set off across town to meet the girls at the edge of the park, where they had decided they would all meet then walk together to Monet’s flat.
Scarlet heard her friends before she saw them, Vanjie’s distinctive laugh ricocheting off trees and mixing with Yvie’s Bond-villan one letting Scarlet know she was heading in the right direction. Finally reaching the group, Scarlet gave them all a hug in turn and took in each of their outfits. It was still icy and cold, so most of them had opted for trainers over heels- save for Plastique, who always wore them for any night out and Vanjie, who was wearing chunky heeled boots. Much of their clothes clashed with the weather, though. Plastique and Akeria were in tight dresses, Brooke and Silky were in short skirts and tops. Vanjie had chosen some loose-fitting ripped denim jeans and a tiny bodysuit which left little to the imagination. Nina had gone for a light blue t-shirt dress and a chunky pair of trainers, her nerves palpable even in the group dynamic. Scarlet thought Yvie looked the best though in her burnt orange velvet skirt and tight black long-sleeved bodysuit, her unruly hair tamed and brushed into two huge bunches.
"You look nice, Nina!” Scarlet complimented her in an attempt to calm her down.
“Aww, Scarlet! Do I actually?” Nina smiled brightly, then cringed at herself. “Fuck! Why can’t I just take a fucking compliment like a goddamn normal person? I do this with Monet all the time!”
“Because you got a big-ass crush,” Silky shrugged. “It’s almost as big as Akeria’s ass. Not quite, though.”
“Shut up,” Akeria rolled her eyes and shoved her friend.
“Does it even count as a crush if you’re seeing the person in question?” Scarlet wondered out loud. Plastique shifted her weight from one foot to the other.
“Don’t know. Ask Brooke or Vanjie.”
The group exploded into laughter, something about it not quite meeting Brooke or Vanessa’s eyes. They were both standing close together, hands entwined, but Scarlet didn’t know. There seemed as if there was something off. Forced, even.
“Okay, let’s go, motherfuckers. I’m freezing my vagina off,” Vanjie said decisively, Nina moving first and making to lead the way.
“Right, a few things before we arrive,” Nina began speaking at a mile a minute before Scarlet could even compliment Yvie on her outfit. “Monet has somehow got it into her head that you guys are cool enough to be invited to this party. She doesn’t know the truth yet, so just try to act like a group of normal fucking human beings?”
“The truth? What the hell is that meant to mean?!” Brooke let out a laugh.
“That you’re all fucking weirdos! And she, for some reason, still likes me, so I am not having you all put that in jeopardy, capiche?” Nina snapped back, only half-joking.
“Jeez, thanks,” Akeria rolled her eyes, Nina instantly protesting.
“I’m joking! I’m joking. But not really. Like Silk, please try not to overdo it tonight?”
Silky raised her eyebrows and sucked her cheeks in. “I’m making no promises, girl.”
“Akeria, please don’t accidentally make out with anyone’s boyfriends?”
“Oh my God Nina! That happened ONCE!” Akeria cried out incredulously.
“And Vanjie, don’t-”
“Nina. We’re not going to embarrass you. Chill the fuck out,” Yvie rolled her eyes and squeezed the shoulder of the girl in front of her.
The girls all finally reached Monet’s old, red-brick building and her front door, and Nina pressed the buzzer nervously. There came a crackly screech of mayhem through the intercom which contained unintelligible speech, and then the girls were all quickly buzzed in. Scarlet looked to Yvie questioningly as she wondered if she’d heard any words, but she also appeared to be as clueless as she was. It didn’t seem to faze any of the other girls though, as Vanjie was already bounding up the stairs with Akeria as fast as her chunky heels could carry her. They didn’t have to walk far, as Monet’s flat was on the first floor. Vanjie moved to open the door first when it was suddenly wrenched open from the other side to reveal a tiny, skinny blonde girl with her hair curled and loose on her shoulders. Her pink dress was as tiny as she was, but regardless of her size she looked ready to fight.
“Who the fuck are you?” she addressed Akeria, barely acknowledging the others. “You here to sell us girl scout cookies, or an Avon catalogue, check our meter readings maybe?"
Just as Akeria looked as if she would instigate a full-scale fight, Nina poked her head out from behind Brooke’s tall frame. "Cracker, don’t be a dick!”
The girl’s face immediately relaxed into a wide, shameless smile. “Nina! Oh my God, you bitch, I never saw you! Come in, God!”
Akeria still bristling and Vanjie not too dissimilar, the girls all trooped into the flat which immediately struck Scarlet as something out of an American teen Netflix special. The hall was dark with the occasional string of fairy lights, and was packed full of people. Scarlet instinctively reached for Yvie’s hand in the crowd and got a squeeze back without even having to look at her. Nina and the girl, Cracker apparently, led them through to a huge bedroom which had obviously once been a living room but had been repurposed by a money-hungry landlord. The room was quieter but still had its fair share of people dotted about in amongst the Morrocan market wall-coverings, tiny elephant incense stick holders, and swathes of printed photos and posters that covered the walls like tiles. A huge bed sat to one side where Monet sat sprawled out with her shoes kicked off, chatting to a black girl with a huge afro that otherwise looked so identical to her Scarlet assumed they must be sisters. Cracker flung herself down on top of the mattress and joined them, gesturing vaguely to the girls.
“Neens!!” Monet suddenly squealed as she looked up, throwing her arms out as Nina launched herself half on the bed and half on top of her. Monet continued, muffled, as the rest of the girls awkwardly lingered. “I’m so happy you came, oh my God, this is so amazing!”
“I brought everyone too. Is that still okay? They can leave if not,” Nina instantly reeled off, Brooke bellowing out a laugh. Monet’s face lit up.
“Oh my God of course not! Brooke! Scarlet! Yvie!! Oh my God, come and hug me,” Monet beamed, her intoxication showing ever so slightly as Brooke graciously leaned down and hugged the other girl them got instantly pulled onto the bed. Monet gestured for everyone to come closer. “Guys! It’s so good to see you all, thanks so much for coming! There’s, like. Endless booze in the kitchen. Feel free to just drink us out of house and home.”
Silky’s face lit up and she immediately grabbed Akeria and Plastique, making to drag them through. “Vanj, you comin’?”
“Get me something? I'mma stay here with my girl,” Vanessa shouted back, giving a smile back to Brooke but finding the other girl looking down at her phone instead. Scarlet frowned involuntarily and then was suddenly distracted by a squeeze of her hand from Yvie (who still hadn’t let go).
“I’m going to go make sure Silky doesn’t give herself alcohol poisoning. You want me to bring you back a drink?” she offered, Scarlet unable to help the smile that spread across her face.
“You’re a sweetheart. Surprise me.”
“A pint glass of tequila it is,” Yvie deadpanned as she walked away, too quick for Scarlet’s hand that swatted at her in response. Scarlet tuned into the conversation that the girls were all having on the bed. It was big, but it was still a bed in a student flat, and so Brooke had her elbows resting on the mattress and her lower body on the floor and Scarlet had had to squeeze up to make room for Vanjie to sit beside her.
“She was guarding the place like fort fuckin’ knox,” Vanessa was saying, a playful side eye being cast to the blonde girl, who let out a laugh.
“You’re an animal,” Monet’s potential sister rolled her eyes. “A living guard dog. We should put a collar on you. One of those ones with spikes.”
“Nah. That’s only reserved for people who want to fuck me. Do you want to fuck me, Bob?” the girl asked easily, before taking a swig of the cider bottle she was holding. Monet hooted a laugh and the other girl didn’t even break her expression.
“I wouldn’t eat your pussy if it was made of chocolate fuckin’ fudge cake. Get the fuck out,” she retorted, Nina looking up at them all from her position on Monet’s tummy.
“Is that not that Lana Del Ray lyric? My pussy tastes like chocolate fudge cake…”
Scarlet let out a laugh that was more like a scream, the others on the bed doing much the same thing. Monet wiped her eyes and took in a deep breath.
“Oh my God, okay. For those of you that haven’t met before- this is Cracker and Bob. Two out of the three girls I have the blessing or curse of living with, I haven’t figured out yet,” she gestured to the two girls in turn and then turned to Scarlet. “And this is Scarlet, Vanjie and Brooke Lynn. They’re Nina’s friends, so they’re obviously amazing.”
“Nina could throw up on your bed and you’d say it was amazing,” Cracker looked pointedly at Monet. Monet shrugged and threw her arms around Nina.
“And what?"
"Nice to meet you guys. Are you two sisters?” Scarlet asked, curiosity getting the better of her as she pointed between Bob and Monet. Monet laughed and Bob rolled her eyes.
“Are you saying that all black people look the same?” Bob asked her with a piercing stare, Scarlet’s entire stomach dropping at the thought of having offended her.
“Oh my God, no! No no no, I just thought-”
“She’s kidding, Scarlet. Being a dick, as usual,” Monet cut off Scarlet’s frantic protests and immediately calming her down. “No, we’re not related. We just look spookily alike.”
“You fuckin’ wish you looked even a tenth as good as me. Hey, where the fuck is Monique?” Bob asked suddenly, both Cracker and Monet shrugging.
“Flatmate number four,” Monet quickly cut in to explain.
“Away making some chaotic cocktail, probably,” Cracker shrugged. Bob gave another roll of her eyes, then turned and smiled at Brooke, Scarlet and Vanessa.
“Nice to meet you anyway. Are you all flatmates too?” Bob asked politely, ignoring the position of the slit on her long skirt as she crossed her legs.
“Not us three exactly. Brooke lives with Nina and Yvie, that’s my girlfriend,” Scarlet explained, her stomach full of fizzy fireworks at being able to say that for real. “Vanj lives with Silky and Akeria over on Antigua Road.”
“They’re the best hoes in the world. They’re through in the other room getting drunk, but you’d love them,” Vanjie cut in. Cracker let out a laugh.
“Oh yeah, shit. Sorry I was so mean to you.”
Vanessa smiled easily, the free alcohol that the flatmates were providing clearly making up for any perceived slight. “Don’ worry about it, girl. We’d probably do the same if some hoes we didn’t know turned up at our party.”
“What about you, Scarlet?” Bob asked politely, instantly seeming far less intimidating.
“I’m over on the South Side. Kinda far out. I found this girl on SpareRooms to live with, but she’s a bit of a dick,” Scarlet explained awkwardly. Cracker leaned in, her eyes shining excitedly.
“What’s her name?”
“Fuck, I don’t want to say in case any of you are friends with her!” Scarlet laughed, but no protestations came. She lowered her voice as she continued. “It’s Ra'Jah? Ra'Jah O'Hara?”
“Oh, FUCK!” Bob cried out, holding onto Cracker for support as she almost fell off the bed. “I know who that is! She’s in my Econ tutorials! Oh my God, she’s an actual fucking moron. I had a group project with her once and she did literally nothing but talk about drugs and bitch about people on our course.”
As Scarlet was about to launch into how horrifically messy a flatmate she was, Yvie came back from the kitchen with two bottles of beer and a tall black girl with a shock of lilac hair swept up into a ponytail and a matching straight fringe. She was wearing a black pair of jeans and a tiny black cropped t shirt which showed off her many tattoos, and in her hand looked to be an elaborate mojito-style concoction.
“I made a friend!” she cried, before slumping herself down beside Vanjie, Scarlet growing ever more squashed up against the bedpost.
“Oh, the wanderer returns,” Cracker deadpanned. “What did you make?”
“Margarita mojito,” the girl shrugged, sipping her drink to punctuate her sentence. “It’s basically a mojito with a big-ass shot of tequila in it. Guys, this is Yvie! She’s Nina’s friend!”
“Oh, you’re Scarlet’s girlfriend!” Bob smiled at her in recognition, Yvie clambering into a tiny space on the middle of the bed, handing one of the beers to Scarlet, and casting her a look through narrowed eyes.
“What have you been saying about me, bitch?” Yvie smiled playfully, the look she was fixing her causing a sudden flash of heat to strike between Scarlet’s legs.
“All good things, baby,” Scarlet smiled innocently, Yvie relaxing and leaning back against Scarlet’s chest.
“This is Bob and Cracker. They’re my other flatmates. You’ve already met Monique, then?” Monet introduced the girls to Yvie.
“Yeah, we bonded over watching Akeria flirt with people. The bitch is a fucking mastermind. She walked into the kitchen and had a guy talking to her within, like, one minute.”
“Introduce me, introduce me!” Monique bounced on the mattress excitedly. Vanjie came dangerously close to falling off the bed and Monique quickly noticed, reaching a hand out to her and pulling her up with it. “Shit, sorry girl!”
Scarlet watched as Vanessa swept some hair out of her face and cast a quick appreciative glance to Monique’s toned arm. “Holy mother of Jesus, I gotta start goin’ to the gym.”
Monique let out a bark of a laugh. Cracker caught her other arm and held it steady, the tequila/rum combo threatening to fly out of its glass.
“Brooke, Scarlet and Vanjie, meet Monique.
Monique, this is Brooke, Scarlet and Vanjie,” Cracker pointed to each of them in turn, finishing with Vanjie who still seemed to be casting her eyes over Monique.
“Well, Vanessa. But these girls call me Vanjie. Or Vanj. You choose, really,” Vanjie explained to Monique, the girl’s ponytail swishing as she cocked her head.
“You ever get called baby?” she asked, feigning innocence. Scarlet couldn’t help her eyes shooting wide and her brain almost went into meltdown trying to register everyone’s expressions at once. Vanjie was laughing, but her face had flushed pink, clearly flattered. Cracker was screeching a laugh, Bob looked long-suffering. Nina and Monet were looking at each other urgently, and Brooke was properly looking at Vanessa with interest for the first time since they all sat down on the bed. Scarlet couldn’t see Yvie’s face, but she’d felt her tense up, and she couldn’t blame her.
“Yeah. By Brooke Lynn over there,” Vanessa finally said through her laughter, Monique not seeming fazed as she cast a glance to Brooke, who was smiling patiently but inwardly seething if the red tips of her ears were anything to go by.
“Oh, sorry girl! I didn’t know she was taken,” Monique laughed pleasantly.
“Yeah, we’re a thing,” Brooke opened her mouth, breaking her silence. Vanessa was smiling at her from across the bed, and Brooke met her eyes and smiled back.
“A thing?” Monique let out a short laugh, spilling a little of her drink. “A thing is, like, a noun. Not a relationship.”
“Technically a girlfriend is a noun too. Thing, place, person,” Nina piped up, presumably in an attempt to diffuse the increasingly awkward vibe.
“Are you a primary teacher, Nina?!” Cracker asked, clutching her chest in faux-surprise. Nina sighed.
“If I could reach a pillow, I’d thump you."
"Monet, you hearing this? Your girlfriend is practically chatting me up,” Cracker laughed, then stopped suddenly as her face became a mix of horrified and regretful, Bob giving her a not-so-subtle thump on the arm. In lieu of gauging Monet and Nina’s facial expressions, Scarlet whispered her thoughts to Yvie.
“When the hell are they actually going to become official? It’s been ages!” she hissed into her ear, Yvie craning her head round to reply.
“Nina would have to be on a cocktail mixer of cocaine, Es and alcohol to gain even half the confidence it would take her to ask Monet, so she’s waiting on Monet to do it for her. The thing is, I think Monet’s not as confident as we all like to think either. Maybe sometimes Nina’s panic can present itself as disinterest.”
“So Monet’s maybe waiting until she knows where she stands with her?” Scarlet nodded in realisation.
Yvie sipped her drink and took Scarlet’s hand, tracing round her fingers absent-mindedly. “I think so. I mean, we all know Nina’s absolutely ass-over-tit in love with her because we’re her friends, but she’s not going to let that show to Monet until she’s ready.”
Scarlet watched as Yvie played with a large turquoise ring on her finger. Her brow was furrowed as she thought about the situation, and Scarlet’s heart felt like an enormous water balloon- incredibly fragile and full and feeling as if it was about to burst. She thought back to Yvie’s words on Christmas dinner night, the ones she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about since she’d said them.
Suddenly, she was pulled out of her thoughts by a screech from Vanjie, who was looking at Monique with enrapture as she told a story. Admittedly, most of the other girls were looking at her too, but Scarlet didn’t miss the sparkle in Vanjie’s eyes as she listened.
“And there it was, I swear by almighty God, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit…a whole baggie of weed, in the bin, covered in Cracker’s vomit.”
It was an odd moment for Scarlet to tune into the story but judging by the roar the girls on the bed gave, it seemed to be over. Vanjie had doubled over laughing and was clinging to Monique’s arm for support, the girl in question smiling down at her as if her reaction was the only one that mattered. Scarlet frowned and leaned into Yvie once more.
“Hey. What the hell is the deal with Brooke and Vanjie?” she whispered, making sure to keep her voice extra low. She instantly felt Yvie tense up in her lap.
“What do you mean? They seem fine to me?” Yvie murmured back. Luckily for Scarlet, she knew that Yvie lied so rarely that it was easy to spot when she was telling one.
“You know something. What is it?” Scarlet hissed urgently in Yvie’s ear. Hearing her give a big sigh, Yvie shifted and then rose on the bed.
“Me and Scarlet are just getting another drink, save our seats,” Yvie announced to the circle, receiving a cheer from Nina.
“Enjoy your sex!” she cried after them, and Scarlet, confused, simply followed Yvie to another room. The hall was quieter now, but the same could not be said of the kitchen, where as they walked in they saw Silky, Akeria and Plastique ringleading a game of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. Ignoring their friends, Yvie turned to Scarlet urgently, concern covering her face.
“Okay, Brooke told me this in confidence but you’re my girlfriend so I kind of can’t really keep anything from you, right?” she began, Scarlet nodding quickly and desperate to hear what Yvie knew. “But you CAN’T tell anyone about this, babe. Honestly, it needs to stay between us. Do you promise?”
“I promise,” Scarlet said instantly, her mind in overdrive. Yvie pulled a pained face for a moment, seemingly incredibly conflicted, and then looked to the floor.
“Brooke is having second thoughts about being with Vanjie.”
Scarlet’s face dropped. “What?!”
“Brooke told me that she felt everything was getting too intense, and that Vanj wanted more than Brooke felt she could give her. She’s sticking it out to see if it’s just a blip, but…yeah. Now you know why they’ve both been so weird,” Yvie explained, biting her lip and looking at Scarlet with concern.
Scarlet didn’t know what to think. It all made so much sense, the oddly distant vibes between them both, the strained atmosphere, Vanjie flirting with Monique. Suddenly, a thought occurred to Scarlet. “Does Vanessa know?”
Yvie rolled her eyes. “Yes absolutely, Scarlet, Vanjie is very happy staying with someone who isn’t even sure if she wants things to go further with her, Brooke’s told her everything!"
Scarlet’s mind seemed to fuse. "She needs to know.”
Yvie’s expression dropped. “Oh my fucking Christ, you literally just promised not to tell anyone.”
“Well I didn’t know what it was you were going to tell me! I mean shit, Yvie, imagine that was me and you and I was having second thoughts! Would you want to be kept in the dark?”
Yvie bit her lip and looked to the floor. Scarlet gave a snort. “Exactly, bitch. I’m going to go find her right now-”
“Scarlet, please,” Yvie stopped her quickly, reaching out and grabbing her hand. “Brooke would be fuckin’ raging at me. I told you this shit in confidence. I know it’s hard because you’re close with Vanjie, but can you please…I mean hold off at least. If she asks you about it then, fine. You can tell her. But don’t run through there just now.”
Scarlet’s head felt as if it was a mess. She tapped her foot against the linoleum floor. “Who’s she told?”
“Just me,” Yvie said sincerely, looking into Scarlet’s eyes. “Nina doesn’t know. It’s just us.”
Scarlet rolled her eyes. “Fine. But I’m pinning all the fucking blame on you if she finds out I know, you know that?”
Yvie nodded understandingly. Scarlet let out a big sigh. The silence between them hung heavy in the air, at odds with the party happening around them. Suddenly, Plastique tottered into their line of vision, her eyes glazed and drunk.
“Oh my God guys! I haven’t seen you like all night! Selfie!!” she cried, sticking her phone in the air. Scarlet felt herself smile weakly but luckily the photo seemed to be too blurry for anyone to notice. Plastique immediately walked off again.
“Okay bye, nice seeing you,” Yvie deadpanned after her. Scarlet pressed her lips together to stop a laugh escaping them. Yvie caught her eye and snorted, and Scarlet couldn’t help but let out the laugh she’d been holding in. The tension had been diffused by a drunk Plastique, and Scarlet was relieved. She ran her hand down Yvie’s arm and squeezed her hand.
“I’m sorry.”
“No, I’m sorry. I should’ve just kept the fucking secret,” Yvie sighed, lacing her fingers through Scarlet’s own. She smiled at Scarlet, showing the little gap in her teeth, and Scarlet felt her heart jump. “Hey, I kind of want to go get chips, cheese and gravy and then head back to the flat and watch the Scooby Doo movie. You down?”
Scarlet smiled. She was kind of over the party. She’d been so eager for a night out, but all she wanted right now was a night in with her girlfriend. “Sounds amazing. Let’s go.”
The two headed back through to the bedroom to grab their jackets and say goodbye to the rest of the girls. Notably absent from the room were Brooke and Vanessa, and Scarlet was about to mention this to Yvie when they walked back out into the hall and spotted a tall, blonde girl and a small brunette kissing furiously in a darker, quieter corner. As Yvie opened the front door, she turned to Scarlet.
“I feel like they won’t be far behind us. Brooke must have sorted her shit out, then.”
As Scarlet grabbed one last look at the two girls against the wall, she desperately hoped Yvie was right.
#rpdr fanfiction#not nineteen forever#n19f#s11#s10#ortega#college au#lesbian au#branjie#scyvie#ninex#brooke lynn hytes#vanessa vanjie mateo#yvie oddly#scarlet envy#monet x change#nina west#silky nutmeg ganache#akeria davenport#plastique tiara#bob the drag queen#miz cracker#monique heart#university au
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Reviewing Google Audience Reviews of WWE Raw
One day, I searched Monday Night Raw on Google for reasons even unbeknownst to me. What is it out of boredom? A sliver of hope that I’d discover Raw had been canceled and replaced with a rebooted Prime Time Wrestling? I don’t know, but I did stumble upon some treasure in my aimless journey: Google Audience Reviews of Raw! This is apparently a new feature to Google. It allows people like you and I to give our baseless, uninformed opinions on any TV show at any time. Isn’t the Internet great?
But, man, if that wasn’t good enough, the real treasure are the reviews themselves. Such an intriguing look into the jaded, ignorant, infuriating, hilarious, and naive group of folks who make up WWE’s fanbase. The thing about the Internet, for better or worse, is that it gives a platform for all sorts of people to voice their opinion, even on a silly wrestling show. However, I’d like to think that also means it gives me the platform to give my opinion on their opinion. There are countless Raw reviews in this new section of Google, but here are a few that have really caught my eye:
Review #27: The AEW Truther
Okay, I’ll start out by sussing out some bullshit: All Elite Wrestling has a lot of promise, but we need to stop with the narrative that they’re going to be breathing down the WWE’s neck right out of the gate. They haven’t even put on their first show and don’t have a TV deal. In addition, outside of the diehard Internet fans and wrestling journalists, the casual fan who tunes into Raw isn’t going to give a fuck about AEW, mainly because they haven’t heard of it. So, no, “us Pro Wrestling fans” aren’t just going to turn to that. Again, it’s got potential and the excitement over it is valid, but I can’t help but feel the ones hyping it up the most will be the first to voice their disappointment when it doesn’t match even a fraction of what they expected.
With all of that said, I absolutely agree with this fan on the egregiousness of WWE putting an actual fascist dickhead and a convicted rapist into their Hall of Fame, especially when there’s inexplicably more rage geared toward the likes of Koko B. Ware and Torrie Wilson getting inducted, two people who were company employees for several years. I’m usually never the one to be up in arms over who gets inducted in the Hall of Fame because it’s a fake hall for a fake sport at the end of the day, but I do earnestly believe the focus should be on the workers who clocked in the hours.
Review #352: The Benoit Truther
Look, even though many will disagree, it’s okay for you to think Daniel Bryan sucks. Everyone has their own unique set of faves and least faves, and yours is no less valid than anyone else’s. Consensus in the fan community is boring, anyway.
Well, within reason anyway, because I’d like to think that the probability of Chris Benoit rotting in Hell right now is something we can all agree on. And, honestly, still listing Benoit as the greatest of all time feels wrong on a deep, moral level. The dude did some great things in his career, yes, but that’s besides the point. That doesn’t cancel out that he murdered his wife and son. Is defending the name of someone who will always be associated with a slaughtered family a hill you really want to fight on?
I don’t want to make it seem a comment like this is totally uncommon. It’s not much different from the various Youtube comments that linger on to this day about how Benoit should be inducted into the Hall of Fame. It still infuriates me though, largely because it feeds into the cesspool of Benoit apologia that’s only swelled since that fateful weekend in 2007. It’s the kind of language that words Benoit as ultimately a tragic figure whose poor brain was so damaged that his crimes were practically unavoidable, an explanation that wouldn’t be afforded to him if he weren’t so widely regarded by smarky wrestling bros. And that’s a bunch of shit.
The first half of the review isn’t so bad, which is why I didn’t include it. Maybe this fan just isn’t aware of what they’re saying, and I get that, but intentions can only go so far with me. The scariest part though? 78 people found the review helpful. The most of any review I’ve seen so far. Fuckin’ balls.
Review #658: The Anti-Bullying Crusader
Okay, so I kinda love this. It’s such a nice reminder in a time where kayfabe is long dead and the WWE roster, regardless of heel/face alignment, will post pics with each other out in the town on social media that there are still fans who eat all of this shit up. I obviously know nothing about this person, but the review conjures up the image of an ornery senior citizen sitting ringside ready to whack those dastardly heels with a cane.
The bullying argument is hilarious. We all know WWE’s anti-bullying campaign Be A Star is hypocritical, disingenuous bullshit, largely birthed out of Linda McMahon’s failed run in politics. Like, how many of their storylines involve and normalize bullying? How many times have guys like The Rock and John Cena engaged in homophobic and misogynistic taunting on-screen over the years? There’s nothing wrong with informing your younger viewers on why bullying in real life is wrong, but you can’t deny the WWE has certainly trivialized the message.
And it’s even more ridiculous when someone stops watching because of all the fake, scripted bullying on the show. Honestly, my friend, what are you expecting out of a wrestling product then? Bobby Roode vs. Heath Slater in a Handshake Contest? Also, this fan has been watching since they were five years old, no doubt remembering a more innocent time where Steve Austin would give the Stunner to someone who completely didn’t deserve that.
I also love the last line. After bashing Raw for its bully-enabling platform, they at least concede that the ladies are killing it right now. Such an encouraging feminist stance!
Review #229: Everyone Had Fun and Nobody Got Hurt
Um, what? I do get what this fan is saying in the sense that, yes, wrestling is just play fighting, but “their policy of no violence”? Do I need to bring up that Roode/Slater handshake battle for the ages? And the wrestlers may sell fake injuries on TV all the time, but they can sustain injuries that are real as hell and carry some severe long-term repercussions. I feel like I’m being way too harsh, but come on now. If you’ve been watching since 1999, you’ve probably seen plenty of guys take unnecessary, dangerous bumps that shorten their careers. Watching even a small bit of Mick Foley’s work can probably tell you that.
With that said, I do love the refreshing stance in loving wrestling because it’s scripted. People usually hate on wrestling for that reason alone, largely because the business has historically gone to great lengths to make it seem real. It’s great to have someone who basically says, “You know, this is scripted bullshit and I’m okay with it.” And honestly, girl, I feel the same way. We need more people like us.
Review #44: Garden Variety Lapsed Fan #15,712
This certainly is a take. I can’t comment on what it’s like in other fandoms, but so many wrestling fans love to engage in the narrative that WWE stopped being good a long while ago and the current product is the worst it’s ever been but because they’re such a diehard fans they’ll stick around until it gets good again and willingly suffer through all of it due to the innate goodness in their hearts or some shit. The only difference in each of these arguments is that the date of the tipping point always changes. There are fans right now who’ll tell you WWE circa 2019 is the worst it’s ever been, but this was also true back when I first started traversing the Internet back in 2004 or 2005 and fans then were talking how that period was the worst it had ever been.
With that in mind, I find this review a bit refreshing in the face of Attitude Era truthers, who’ll repeatedly tell you wrestling, and seemingly all of pop culture, stopped being good sometime in the early 2000s. But as we near closer and closer to 20 years since that era ended, the more likely we are to see younger fans who have no real nostalgia for it. It won’t be long until we hear more and more talk about the salad days of Roman Reigns, Braun Strowman, and others. This fan says WWE stopped being good in late 2016/early 2017, which obviously wasn’t that long ago. I’m sure some fan daydreaming about the days of the Monday Night Wars would find this completely baffling.
It begs the question: when exactly was the WWE good? Has it ever been good? I don’t think any one answer is the sole correct one. None of these perspectives are invalid by any means. Every era of wrestling has had its pros and cons, and everyone has their own set of standards on what they consider a quality wrestling product. And, to be real, I don’t want to excuse the WWE of their shitty, at times irredeemable, booking and creative decisions. Fans have been driven away for numerous, valid reasons over the years.
But there’s that whole notion that nothing can ever bring back those early feelings of puppy love, and that’s just as true with the way wrestling first captivates you. Perhaps the constant frustration with present day WWE is partly the inability to rekindle what first hooked you in and never being able to recapture that feeling because, well, it’s simply not possible.
Review #788: Our Savior
We are not worthy of this review. A true diamond in the rough. So many good bits here. The prediction that Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose will compete in a “no holes barred” match, which sounds like something out of a Sean Cody wrestling parody. The invention of the “Tang Tang Championship” featuring the likes of “Pop Scott Dulson and his tag team partner." The referring of Baron Corbin as not only “Barry Korgan,” but also as “Brian Corbin.” The passage that merely says “All winding.” The passage that merely says “Bobby Lashley.” That it’s not even a review of Raw, the TV show, but more a comment on the existential nihilism we feel in the Trump era.
I’ve never seen a review that makes no sense but also says so much. I love the complete refusal of punctuation marks. Who needs those archaic things, anyway? It just makes it all one, continuous thought, a stream of consciousness that could make even James Joyce blush. I also dig the experimentation with spacing. After all, why do we need to just one space? Why not several? It’s important to give our thoughts the space they need and this fan understands that. Plus, it makes for poetic reading.
The review ends on an ominous note, with the fan’s last message being “My name Matthewhisee.” Is this meant to be a threat? A coded message of some sort? Matthewhisee, if that is your name, please let us know more. The world needs your insight. Oh, and to the 7 people who found this review helpful, you are the vanguards of the resistance. Bless you all.
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Hurricane P17
Happy x Reader
Warnings/Triggers: Smut references. 18+ only, If under 18, kindly un-follow me and leave my blog. Come back when you are 18! Sick dog. Jax being himself.
Notes: Hope you all enjoy my loves!!!
Gifs and pics not mine!
Tags: @trippinjenni @moodygrip
You woke up at around five, to see Kozik still awake and Happy laying on the floor on the other side of Kozy. His arm draped around the dog cuddling him. You smiled seeing this sight. “Good morning sis.” “Morning.” You stood up slowly not to wake the two sleeping boys. You kissed Koziks head and walked to the kitchen opening the fridge. Grabbing eggs and some bacon you set it on the counters. “Kozik you can go and sleep in the guest room.” “I actually did fall asleep for a bit, about the same time Happy did. I just woke up a few minutes ago.” You nodded grabbing the coffee from the top shelf. Getting water you filled the coffee pot, then poured the grounds into the filter. You sat against the counter pressing start. Turning to the eggs and bacon you began to prepare them. Whisking the eggs till fluffy, you poured them in the skillet and set the bacon on a baking rack, putting it in the oven. You scrambled the eggs on the pan, grabbing some cheese and throwing it in for good measure. After the eggs where done you put them in a large bowl with a spoon. Pulling the bacon out, you smiled at how crispy it was. Plating it you grabbed three plates and silverware. “Brother, food is done.” You walked into the living room, kneeling next to Happy. “Food is done babe.” He groaned waking up slightly. He looked up to see your beautiful face smiling down at him. He was 100% sure this was heaven staring into y/c/e. He slowly got up, careful not to disturb Kozy. You grabbed a blanket and folded it thick. Setting it in the kitchen next to your chair. “Hap, can you bring him in here.” He nodded slowly lifting Kozy up. Walking him to the kitchen he laid him down carefully. You pet his head as he woke up slightly. “Morning my baby.” You kissed Kozys head. He gave you a slight lick and fell back asleep. “If I ate a tray of pot brownies I’d be knocked out too.” Happy laughed a bit. “Remember when we ate those brownies from Donut, his old lady made for us?�� you snorted shaking your head. “Man.. that was a fucked up few days!”
“Babe, Yana made some brownies for us.” Happy walked in setting them on the table. You walked in a bra and panties, currently in the middle of doing your hair. “Fuck..” Happy looked you up and down. walking over he grabbed your hips pulling you close to him kissing your neck. “Hey Babe! Doing my hair for date night.” “Mmm.. lets spend it inside. Me making love to you all night..” he kept kissing up and down your naked neck. “Hap we always do that.. we plan a nice night out and you decide we make love all night. As great as our sex life is, I want to have fun night out with my old man!” Happy smiled a bit. He kissed the top of your head agreeing. “Want a brownie while you get ready. I am going to have one.” You nodded as he walked opened the container handing you one. Both of you chatting as you ate it. “Well I am going to go finish my hair.” Hap agreed watching you walk to the bed room.
30 Minutes later you felt a slight buzzed feeling. By this time Happy had given you one more brownie since you asked for it. They were really chocolaty and delicious, more so than any brownie you had ever ate. Your body started to get heavier by the second. You hurd Happys footsteps come down the hall. He looked at you slumped over on your makeup table staring at him. “What the fuck….. why do I feel like this..” you mumbled, your mouth felt like it was moving so slow. Taking forever to even finish a sentence. “I think…. Those brownies had weed in them…” Happy stumbled to the bed laying down. Staring at the ceiling fan he watched it go around and around. “Fuckkkkkkkkk…” Happy spoke, making the word go long. You slowly stood up laying down next to him. He looked at you and you looked at him. “Damn.. how much weed did she fucking put in these…….” You hiccupped laughing at Haps expression. He had the classic stoner look on. Blank faced with a slight hazy smile.
Tuning over you fell off the bed. “Omph!” “You ok…?” you slowly got up siting back on the bed. “Yeah..” the buzz was a bit lower then the night before. “We fell asleep…” he nodded turning to look at you. “Yeah.. fuck those where really strong. I do not know how people expected to do much on these.” Happy slumped arm over your body. “I am starving… but can barly move…” you laughed nodding. “Same…”
Waking up the next morning you and Happy looked at the clock. “Fuck it is 3PM!” you stood up quickly. Happy grabbed his phone calling Donut. “What the fuck where in those brownies!?” you hurd Donut laughing his ass off on the other side of the phone. “Yana gave you the wrong ones… no need to come to the clubhouse today you two. It takes a bit to get normal after those.” Happy hung up the phone and dialed another number. “Yes.. can I get two large peperoni pizzas, a spaghetti with meatballs, garlic bread and some diet mountain dew for my lady?” Happy hung up the phone. “I love you so much..” you smiled at him giving him a lazy kiss. “Mmm… If I was not so damn buzzed I’d ask for more..” you laughed agreeing.
That night, Happy and you ate all the food he ordered.
“Baby.. thanks for the food.” Happy sat down dishing him self some eggs and bacon. Kozik agreed doing the same. They both ate and chatted. You moved your food around a bit taking small bites staring down at Kozy tiredly. The dog woke up wagging his tail slightly. “Gotta pee baby?” the dog slowly got up following you to the patio. Lifting him up you walked down the stairs with him. You sat on the stairs of the deck, watching as he sauntered around sniffing the grass. He eventually peed and pooped. You waited till he was at the steps and lifted him up. Opening the door he followed you back to the kitchen. Kozik and Happy cleaning up the dishes besides your plate. “Sis eat. Then go back to sleep.” You did not feel like fighting and agreed. Finishing the food you handed the dishes to Happy and went to the couch. “Hun.. go ahead and take Kozy to sleep on the bed.” You smiled widely at him agreeing.
Laying in the bed, Kozik laid Kozy next to you. He covered both of you up, kissing the top of both your heads. “Sleep you two.” Nodding you drifted asleep. Kozik grabbed his phone and started looking at apartments for rent. “What do you think about her moving to another apartment?” Happy sighed putting the dishes away. “Not excited.. but I can see her reasoning. Intel, we get our grounding everything will be chaotic.” Kozik agreed. “I am sorry that I am not sorry for hitting you..” Kozik mumbled. “I am not upset.. you did it for her. I would do the same.” They both agreed with each other as they sat on the couch.
“Y/N wake up..” you felt a slight movement in you shoulder. Opening your eyes you seen Happy waking you up. Touching over the bed you did not feel Kozy. “He came into the living room a bit ago. He is asleep with your brother on the couch. We fed him half his food like the vet suggested.” You grabbed Happy by his kutte pulling him to you. You kissed him deeply, moving your hands to his face you pulled him on top of you. He shifted his weight not to put any on you still concerned about your wounds. His tongue slid past your lips and glided against yours. He pushed his hard-on against your pajama pants. Moaning in his mouth he did it again. He pulled away breathing hard. “Fuck.. what was that for…?” you smiled at him, rubbing your thumb against his plump bottom lip. “For watching over Kozy and I..” he bent his head down kissing your lips gently. “Always my hurricane.” “Ew… can we not do that while Kozik is in the house…?” you looked over blushing slightly. “Then quit staring.” Happy shrugged looking at him. “Well I gotta go. Kozy is sleeping. Bye you two!” you waved as he walked out. Happy waited till the door was closed before he pulled your shirt up revealing your braless chest. “Mmm… fuck…” he licked up your tummy to your breasts latching on to one of your nipples. He notes how much lighter the bruises where since the last time he had seen your bare body. “Aahh.. Happy…” you slide your hand to the back of his neck holding him there. He rolled your nipple between his teeth, sucking and slightly biting. The pain and pleasure sending shocks up and down your spine. Happy trailed his tongue to your other nipple, leaving saliva connecting the two. Repeating the actions again, you felt your body starting to tingle. “Mmm.. such pretty nipples… such beautiful breasts…” he mumbled against them. “Happy don’t stop..” you bucked into him, begging for the friction. Your legs turning to jelly as you felt an orgasm keeping you on edge. You knew he knew how to please you. How to make you cum without even touching your soaked core.
“Whoa sorry!!” you looked at the doorway to see Jax and Gemma standing there. Happy shot up covering you. He slammed the door in Jaxs face. Once you got situated he opened it again. “What the fuck do you want prince?!” you anger was for two reasons. 1. What he did to Kozy. 2. Denying you the orgasm Happy was about to give you. “I came to apologize. When no one answered and the door was unlocked I got worried.” Gemma nodded agreeing with her son. Showing the gun she had pulled out as they searched the house. “Gemma do you need me for something?” “I came to check on your wounds. Seems like your are ok. I still see your ribs are slightly bruised.” You blushed knowing they both seen you topless. Happy stood behind you, hands on your hips. You could feel the heat radiating off him. Both in anger and horniness. “There is a party tomorrow night guys. Come Y/N.” Gemma smiled at you. “We hit are years sales goal in two months because of you!” you blinked slightly. “It has been two months since I have been here?!” you internally where shocked. “Well month and a half including Colorado.” You winced at the memories. “We will be there.” Happy spoke up, cold as ever. Jax turned around, he looked down seeing Kozy come up to him. Jax leaned down petting him. “I am so sorry little man for making you sick. Hope the trippin was not too bad for you. You probably see me with three heads right now..” he rubbed the top of Kozys head. “You lucky.. I don’t tell him to bite.. you.” Jax frowned standing up walking over to you. “You can hit me again if you want darlin.” At the nickname you felt the clutch Happy on you grow tighter. “Not worth it Prince. He forgives you but I don’t.” Jax sighed bending over, kissing your cheek. “I really am sorry. Sorry for barging in Hap, did it for protective reasons. We have enemies.” Gemma came over hugging you and nodding to Happy. She was a bi quieter than normal. “I will see you tomorrow Gemma. Only if Kozy is better.” “Bring him with. A prospect can watch him. Or Tig.” “Naw.. my baby boy is sick. He is my responsibility.” You said calmly. “Your going to be a great mom one day.” You laughed a bit. “The only kid I want is the one with four paws.” “We will see about that.” She smirked walking out.
You rolled you eyes slightly wondering if she thought you where pregnant or if it was because you and Happy had been fooling around. You felt your center of gravity shift, Happy pushing you gently on the table. “So fucking sick of his nicknames… guess he needs to know who you fucking belong too..”
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