#okay yeah the narrative thing. i did
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2024 reads / storygraph
Asunder
slow-paced high fantasy
a woman who has a contract with an eldritch entity allowing her to see the dead & survives by taking various jobs
when a job searching for stranded smugglers in a cave goes wrong, she ends up with the soul of a dying stranger bound to her shadow
along with a scholar and her old childhood friend, they travel to his home country to find a way to unbind him and save them both
dark fantasy world with gods, demonic entities, arcane magic, and semi-sentient beasts used as transport
#asunder#kerstin hall#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#okay SUPER fascinating worldbuilding with some very visceral creatures and biological constructs and interesting magic systems.#many things I like. A great cast of characters. Honestly I could read tons more stories set in this world.#it’s very slow building and meandering narratively; focusing on the complex journey of the main character#didn’t love the audio narration tbh - it felt like some lines are read with the wrong emphasis or tone? but I got used to it after a while#So this has one of my absolute favourite tropes (bodysharing.) unfortunately it turns it into a romance which is. well.#it just doesn’t hit the same if you make it romantic!! so that kinda made it change traintracks from being on a direct line to#potentially 5 stars to a whole different station where i do not live. lol.#I SUPPOSE it’s a well developed relationship and I’d prefer romances more like that than instalove I guess.#I did love their dynamic; too; but suddenly realising it was romantic threw me for a loop. I had put him in the annoying dad category.#I do also feel like we didn’t get quite enough of him as an individual person and characterisation - which obviously makes sense to an#extent; but I felt like I only got to see more of him in the brief time around his father.#Also he was surprisingly chill and nice to her immediately considering he was essentially her hostage???#Anyway I did enjoy a lot of it; it just suffers the unfortunate tragedy of#[literally my favourite thing made for me] [turns that thing into literally my least favourite thing i hate]#but also -random dude you’re bound to being overly protective and considerate despite barely knowing you (platonic/familial vibe) - yeah!#random dude you’re bound to being overly protective and considerate despite barely knowing you (romantic) ehhhh…idk.....#(to me personally. i'm sure people enjoy that. whatever)
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see i absolutely despise jimmy (and curly) as a character(s) but as a literary freak i can appreciate the way hes used as a story device with his relationship to curly. i could type this more eloquently but currently ive had a glass of champagne and i havent drank in like 6 months so my tolerance is low so forgive my writing but. jimmy cannibalizing curly. yeah.
theres multiple messages here, theres the message that jimmy is doing what curly (assumedly) did to get into his position and, employing another metaphor, taking the "dog eat dog world" saying to heart. and literally. devouring his competition. or maybe curly didnt do that. and thats what jimmy thinks curly did and so he aims to do the same. choose whichever one you like more they're both interesting storywise.
theres the message where jimmy "consumes" curly in some twisted expression of love. devouring curly so that he remains a part of him, an expression that he is the gold star captain and something to aspire to. admiration for something he'll never be and so he chooses to consume him in order to potentially absorb some of his skill or become more like him.
and then there is curly sitting there helplessly being devoured. its something he has no say in, not something that he chose to happen to him, its something hes become swept up in. he becomes devoured by jimmy in the literal sense of cannibalism, but also in the sense that he became so absorbed in his friendship w/jimmy he ignored his wrongdoings and ultimately led to anya's assault as well as the death of the whole crew.
curly and jimmy intertwined so that one is always consumed by the other. curly in a literal sense, jimmy in a more psychological one. i mean like its really quite crazy they did the "im consumed with thoughts about this guy and want to be him so i must literally consume him" thing quite well. when examining mouthwashing's narrative you find new things to admire every time. each little story element has a place in creating a wonderfully complex and heartbreaking story. its very well done and honestly something to aspire to from the perspective of someone who enjoys studying/writing literature.
all of this is to say i think that there should be more art of jimmy covered in blood and engaging in this cannibalism like the stupid little leech he is
#spacie spoinks#only post i will ever make about curly or jimmy btw. i genuinely hate the both of them with a burning passion#i think im just. projecting too hard but i just cant enjoy them. i have tried it doesnt work. and thats okay#my life experiences just affect me too much for that lol#this is all they'll ever get from me lmaoooo#i will enjoy art others make tho#im mostly saying this just so people dont ask me for any curly and jimmy stuff skjfskf you wont get it smiles politely#you can enjoy these characters if you wish no judgement. there is a lot to like about them as you can see by my post#see i can be a hater and introspective at the same time!!!#its not something that can be helped my Literary Analysis brain overrides any hate i feel towards those two#and when i view them as tools in a story they're easier to deal with seeing all the time#anyway enjoy this post. im sure someone has said it better than me but yeah jimmy x curly cannibalism for the win!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i love writing!!!!!!!!!! hope i can also do it some day#see but like my reaction is normal the narrative made me hate them b/c it wanted me to#this is why mouthwashing is a good story it made me *feel* something about these characters#even though that feeling is hatred!! and isnt that just so wonderful#characters did bad things and i hate them b/c of it!! wow. storytelling is awesome#none of this is sarcastic. hope it doesnt come off as that#whenever a narrative makes you feel something with this deep of a complexity it is worth celebrating#mouthwashing#okay happy new year goodnight
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its been so long since human content/new content with no book relevancy even the youtubers and theorists like dawko and john are getting restless😭
#dawko going its not gonna happen steel wool right over glamfred and rhe humans not coming back#and john going 'im... totally okay with that happening 😐' about mimics story being spoiled in the books 2 years before sotm#like dude even theyre feeling it#dawko would love a fnaf game about absolutely nothing so his excitment about sotm makes sense#but its refreshing seeing john actually criticize it bc it deserves to be even if it was really tame and not really explicitly said#we understand and its just. so nice seeing someone like john actually aware of how stupid it id#instead of everyone being okay with it and not criticizing it for some reason#even tho it kind of sucks#like john is one of the last surviving theorists and a big figure in the community#seeing him actually not shy away from at least implying he thinks its bad and dumb in a video is just.#soo refreshing#like so many times i felt like i was insane for disliking all the mimic theories before ruin came out#i thought it was boring. mimic is a book villain#its so sad seeing john try to actually theorize about mimic in an interesting way with a satisfuing narrative that isnt just c&p#but it just turns out that actually yeah. its game is a rerun of its book lore that came out years ago#and we spent three entire years foreshadowing and teasing 'carnival' in games to hype this game up and its just c&p book lore nothing new#except the new shit being like. stuff about OG freddys and og characters which. are not explaining the mimics backstory#its just like whyy did they do it like this. and they shafted basically every single thing else to do it for years#no wonder dawko is starting to actually joke about them never bringing them back and john is implying his distaste#pandas.txt#discourse#sorryyyyy#its just like i think about sotm and im like i dont need to be that hard on it. theres nothing inherently wrong with a game explaining#mimics backstory#and then i remember how it was spoiled 2 years earlier in the books and everybody already knows its story and theres nothing#new about the mimic in this game save for a random new form#and im like yeah nevermind its okay to be critical about it they somehow handled the mimics story in the worst way possible#up to this point#like if youre a fan of literally anything else in the story youll resent mimic at least a little bit for how much it hijacked everything#even all mimic fans are getting are reruns of shit they already know
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🫵PHOTON TRIVIA
o7 YOU GOT IT BOSS!!
as much as i love making robots who Think Like Robots there's none of that here! photon is the ghost of someone real shoved into a metal body and just as unpredictable and irrational as any meat brain is. too obviously mechanical to be a person, too painfully human [mobian. whatever] to be a robot. [and don't you worry, i've definitely thought about how this in-between existence would collide with other robots in the series. give me a minute to stop crying every time i think about mecha sonic mkii and then i'm sending his ass to scrapnik island]
he derisively calls sonic 'meat sonic'. at first it was in response to being called 'metal sonic,' but now that he has his own name it's just this bizarre orphaned punchline kept alive by some mix of complacency and spite. for what it's worth meat sonic thinks it's funny as fuck that photon calls him that
photon can't cry, at least not at first. just doesn't have the physical functionality built into him. he tells himself that it's no loss, he/sonic hated crying anyway, but it's definitely not good for him that such a deeply psychologically necessary function is gone!
of course my autistic ass has thought about the jules and photon dynamic. it's weird, and awkward, and steeped in a thousand layers of feelings that neither of them know how to articulate, but i reckon they do like each other and they are good for each other. jury's still out on whether they can claim to be family, but it's hard not to at least be SOMETHING with the probable only other person on the entire planet who understands at least a little bit of what you're going through, y'know
out of all the things he can't do anymore, photon REALLY misses eating. leftovers from his organic-by-design brain keep telling him that it's been way too long since he ate and he'd feel better if he slammed back a chili dog. he can usually laugh off being asked a fundamentally robot-proof question like when he last slept or if he needs a shower and genuinely not be hurt [much] by it, but he gets real quiet if someone accidentally asks him if he wants anything to eat
because he struggles to conceptualise his body as His Body, he's really bad at treating the possibility of hurting himself with the appropriate gravity. as a result, he's prone to letting himself get injured if it means he gets more done in a fight, or ignoring minor damage until it compounds enough that he's falling apart, or pushing himself until his systems short out. thanks to this reckless approach to personal safety, he's been fully ship of theseus'd at least once since his original neo metal sonic body, which i'm sure is great for that aforementioned difficulty connecting himself with the body he's in
most of photon's interaction with sonic canon post-heroes is vague and messy and not something i've come up with an answer i like to, but i'm pretty confident in how he fits into the idw chunk of the timeline! he never 'officially' joins the restoration, and he's still just as prone to fucking off halfway across the planet as meat sonic, but he starts to be a pretty common sight around their hq. fighting eggman isn't really fun for photon anymore the way it is for sonic, having your entire identity irreversibly ripped away from you by someone makes any future victory against them feel hollow, but he's still got that burning drive to help others - the restoration gives him ways to fight indirectly enough that he can actually feel good about it again. he's one of the few who can meaningfully defend the metal virus survivors, and you BET he's so pissed at sonic for letting it happen he can hardly think straight. lanolin and tangle probably try to get him in the neo diamond cutters, but i don't think he'd take them up on the offer, given that he doesn't respond well to being told what to do. like i mentioned, i want to send his ass to scrapnik island and see how he plays off of another robot sonic turned terrifyingly real and separate person. then of course there's the dynamic between him and belle, which honestly could be a whole post by itself. after a couple years with only a tiny handful of non-grief-inducing friends and some unsustainably destructive coping mechanisms to his name, the point that idw picks up from is where photon finally goes from just enduring the horrors to genuinely feeling happier again :]
#THANK YOU FOR ASKING RAAGHGHGHGHGGGGH <3 <3#if nobody got me i know random friends sincerely engaging with my creative efforts got me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#ending on the nice part about the friends he makes and the new purpose he finds because that's kind of the point i'm making with photon#that yeah the horrors can feel insurmountable and might always be a part of you but things can still be okay anyway#what's that jacob geller quote about darkness and angst not being a story by itself. because that's what i'm trying to manifest#ask to tag#mostly in regards to the point about him being concerningly indifferent to injury/emotionally detached from his body#because to be clear i'm not throwing that in as Le Funny Character Quirk i'm specifically implying depersonalisation due to identity trauma#kartsstuffig#long post#photon posting#did i give him a tag already i forgot oh well he has one now <3#super secret bonus photon trivia. as much as i hate to admit it. he is unfortunately inspired quite a bit by hal homestuck.#because yeah 'the ghost of a real person's brain forced into an unbearably mechanical existence' is a concept that has never left me#unfortunately homestuck fucking blows and hal just kinda falls out of the narrative. but what if that specific idea was in a good story#frankly embarrassing how much of my creative process is 'what if <thing from homestuck> didn't fucking suck' to be honest
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finished watching netflix atla! i think the hate is unjustified lol like all that hate seems a little too intense for what i think the show missed. it didn't hit all the same notes as the original show, yeah, so i'm not sure it quite succeeds as an adaptation, but as a standalone show it's pretty good. and i might have some gripes with the characterization, but there was love in the casting and in the costumes and the world, and that goes a long way for me.
#even tho the costumes DID look reallt new lol#rei rambles#natla#as a show i'd give it like a 7.5 or 8 out of 10#as an adaptation... 5? 6?#the pacing was kinda weird and katara could be meaner but she wasnt terrible#sokka having a confirmed Thing with suki undermines the way his *first* girlfriend became the moon but that's also whatever#i actually LOVED the way they gave more to iroh and zuko about lu ten#and i heard ppl were mad abt azula which is like... why? she barely appears????#as for ozai being more emotional--i GET the gripe i do. really. i just. i am not immune to daniel dae kim okay.#been weak for him since i saw him in hawaii five-o and lost okay#first big asian man crush. only handsome asian man on north american tv for a very long time.#im okay with them humanizing ozai if it means more daniel dae kim ngl#narratively sure yeah it sjpports the zuko's and azula's characters better if he unequivocally sucks#but if they're gonna give him more acting meat i'm not gonna mind in the SLIGHTEST#but anyways yeah they v clearly spotlighted iroh & zuko over some team avatar stuff and i'd be more about it if it wasnt done well#but i actually liked it so i dont mind at all#zuko and iroh were super great
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it’s so cute (/s) when basil fans whine about how “basil feels so guilty all the time and he has abandonment issues cuz his parents were jerks and he’s just a kid who makes mistakes wah wah don’t ever criticize him ever” and then turn around call aubrey a bully when SHE feels so guilty all the time and has abandonment issues cuz her parents are jerks and she’s just a kid who makes mistakes.
hmm.
you’re in a stalemate now basil fans. you can’t admit that basil is your smol innocent baby without admitting that aubrey also is one, which she’s not, right?
so that means basil can’t be either! wow! what a concept, a boy doing something wrong and not having a million excuses made for him?? how wild.
#contrary to popular belief#aubrey is actually just basil but better and cooler and awesomer and more badass#like their situations are so similar but they handled it so differently#and i get that mental illness makes things hard for some people that are easy for others#but nothing aubrey did was a cakewalk#when she realized she fucked up#SHE APOLOGIZED AS SOON AS SHE COULD.#and she ADMITTED WHAT SHE DID#and tried as hard as she could to atone.#what did basil do?#oh yeah.#he pretended to be an innocent baby and it WORKED.#whether or not he meant to#he DID manipulate his friends to believe that he was just a victim#and that aubrey didn’t have a reason for what she was doing#even though she DID have a reason#she just knew nobody would believe her or care if she spoke up about it#okay i know basil fans are gonna send me death threats again#so let me say for the record that I DONT THINK BASIL IS EVIL.#i actually love his role in the narrative and he’s amazing mental illness representation#but he is so good BECAUSE of how hard it is for him to be redeemable.#no matter how sorry he is#BASIL FUCKING DESTROYED PEOPLE. it doesn’t matter that he’s mentally ill.#those scars on the people he hurt won’t fade just because they’re shown a psychiatric diagnosis.#and i think that’s an important lesson#that it’s possible to be mentally ill and a horrible person and that’s not demonizing mental illness that’s just being a person#forgiveness isn’t mandatory. it’s optional and you’re not bad if you decide not to forgive someone for ruining your life!#omori#aubrey omori#basil omori
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also i have to say there's smth consistently eye-rolly about the idea of going "oh you can't blame me for leaving her there !! i thought they were good people !! i didn't think they would do anything bad to her !!! that's why i left her there i thought she was safe !!!" as if "they" even broke that trust. according to literally all accounts the incident in question happened before you left and nothing progressed further after you were gone. accusing "them" of being horrible nasty people when again, the only wrongdoing alleged at all was on the part of one of them ???? like you can just say that while drunk you didn't make the right judgement call and once you woke up sober you checked in with your friend because thinking back you were worried abt her comfort levels without crying wolf about how you simultaneously "thought they were good safe people" and they took advantage of that after you left (by doing nothing after you left, because the whole incident being described here happened with you in the room) and also knew she was uncomfortable which is why you checked on her immediately (which is somehow being used to blame two people who had zero access to the texts asking her if she was comfortable at all and therefore made the assumptions that she was comfortable based on what they themselves saw)
#like no one took advantage of your trust after you left the whole thing did in fact happen while you were in the room#if they /were/ the monsters you feel like painting them as then yeah it would've been really bad for you to leave her in that environment !#but uh things literally never progressed further than they did while you were in the room#like at first i thought you didn't know the same way dr eam apparently didn't know#but no the narrative now is apparently that you knew ? but didn't do anything? and assumed she was okay? but that she was uncomfortable?#or whatever?#which is like. cool you can just say that your drunk brain didn't really ring the alarm bells as much as they shouldve#when you apparently noticed in the moment that she looked uncomfortable and didn't do anything#that doesn't change anything abt what discomfort other people might have perceived as Not Her Best Friend#and that also doesn't mean that you were somehow betrayed bc you trusted them not to be terrible people when you left her there#bc . nothing. in fact. happened . after you left her there.#and the whole 'incident' being described in this whole situation happened WITH YOU RIGHT THERE .#anyway excuse my frustration
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there are a lot of reasons i think pericles is really slept on as one of the most tragic characters in sdmi, and they start with how easy it is to connect the dots that he took a mind-destroying curse full to the face as an infant. one that breaks adult humans and renders them unrecognizable, when pericles was not only a baby but is from a species that is explicitly much more vulnerable to it. right from the beginning of his life the entity obliterated his sense of self so thoroughly that there's not even a version of him who shows up in the Sitting Room.
fuck, man.
#sdmi#scooby doo mystery incorporated#professor pericles#sdmi is fundamentally a show about the cycle of trauma and abuse--about breaking a very literal generational curse#and i think it does a real disservice to both that theme#and pericles' narrative specifically#that he gets painted as That One Guy Who's Just Evil and Abusive for No Reason#when everyone else gets the benefit of 'even thoroughly horrible people are still people'#'and that doesn't mean they didn't hurt you; or that you have to let them keep hurting you'#'or that you're obliged to proceed in a way allowing for the possibility they'll decide to stop. that's on them to do. and they might not.'#even w/o the systemic oppression or decades of torture and psychiatric abuse#pericles was a victim of the entity in genuinely and quite possibly the most thorough way of them all. and yet he made a lifetime worth of#choices and many many many of them were to harm people in horrific ways; to his own ends and for his own satisfaction#and like. what do you do with that.#it is difficult and uncomfortable to sit with that and draw conclusions from it that are neither 'his trauma means none of that counts'#nor 'okay yeah well he's a victim BUT HE DID BAD THINGS SO THAT DOESN'T MATTER FUCK HIM'#if there's any show that invites you to do that it's sdmi; i love that about it. but you can't leave pericles out w/o defeating the purpose#especially when the nature of his being a link in the cycle of abuse is critical context for exploring the trauma of his victims#the vast majority of what he does to ricky is very clearly projecting and reenacting his own trauma onto a vulnerable target#and just. aaaaahhhhhh i have so many feelings about it god#abuse cw#grooming cw#SDMItag
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The only reason I started this was to write this scene.
This story doesn't make sense without this scene.
I am still considering not finishing writing this scene because I have decided that I am incompetent.
#okay it's more like. this scene is supposed to serve a specific emotional and narrative function and I don't think it's doing that#yeah yeah Do The Scary Thing Anyway you'll never be able to experience artistic catharsis if you cut yourself off from it I KNOW OKAY#I'm just...I'm having a Time™ over this#I think something got in my head which like. why did I let it do that. why do I even care.#it's not like I started this to make people happy#but also if I come across as stupid in any way I will actually explode true facts#MAKE BAD ART MAKE BAD ART MAKE BAD ART MAKE BAD ART THIS APPLIES TO YOU TOO MC13
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ok so like. between Sentido and In the Next Life, the kudos discrepancy is obvious (it being a tristamp vs trimax fic)
but honestly, the engagement with In the Next Life is honestly rly encouraging. a 10.8% comments to kudos percentage for Sentido vs 30.8% for ITNL
it was a lil discouraging at first how few kudos it got bc i just got off the high of super fast growing Sentido. but like, when you think about it it makes a lot of sense. the general tristamp fic with a simple setup & effective character exploration using a structure i havent seen otherwise.
vs heavy heavy HEAVY trimax spoilers fic. like this fic is made For Me to cope with reading trimax. but for ppl who dont read as fast as me or havent started it after watching tristamp. if they care about spoilers, this is not what theyre gonna be reading
so it makes sense! and im no longer disappointed, especially considering how sweet all my commenters have been.
im just gonna keep goin at it. im writing this for Me, and either it'll get more attention or it wont. it's enough for the people who are here now to continue this journey with me.
#speculation nation#itnl shit#honestly Sentido is the lowest effort 573 kudos i have ever gotten#like ok i gotta stop discounting it. it genuinely is a good piece of writing. i just know it couldve been better sldkjflskdjf#its point was to be an experimental little thing for me to get a feel for writing these characters#it was only ever meant to be a stepping stone. but ppl really liked it!#and. ngl. im kinda thinking i'll use the bits of relationship building i put into it to supplement itnl previous vashwood#im planning on making a reference in chapter 7 to wolfwood calling vash a chicken-head. or w/e.#just like in Sentido where he says vash's hair looks like a chicken's ass lsdkjflsdkjf#that kind of thing. why SHOULDN'T i use internal consistency between my fics???#im the one who came up with these details in the first place im allowed to reuse them for my other fic.#bc yea that wolfwood is dead but he lives on in vash's heart forever. that relationship is still incredibly important to the narrative.#so like ive got two different vashwoods going on in this fic lksjdfldkj and the 2nd & main one is what we will see build#but the prior one did exist. and it's mostly based on canon. but. But. vash is so completely in love with him#and it's added to by all those little things we wouldnt have seen. like. chicken-ass hair. Yeah.#uhm. this post went in several different directions.#ultimately im inevitably comparing my two trigun fics together. but It's Okay. bc i love them both.#trigun spoilers/
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8x19 has five minutes to give me a reason to care
#it did actually right after i said that. going to need more frequent cuts back to them though#going to liveblog in here cause i’m bored actually. idgaf about this new bitch#i’d be lying if i said idgaf about dogget bc i have come to like him 🙄#can we circle back to mulder for some reason thinks the baby is not his#or the narrative wants me to believe that it isn’t his ? you named the episode per manum not me#anyway. this shit boring as fuckkk. also her attachment to doggett is bordering on not cute#no one else will know this but doggett and carisi are kind of the same. like yes it’s the accent and the small mouth but vibes too#stupid fucking show weaning me off of the main characters. well i know my reward is coming#did he just die . somehow no#pleeeeaaaase show me scully. oh it just did i really needed this#oh yeah i am mad at her actually for the keychain thing. genuinely not cute#oh sped up cgi salamander man we’re really in it now#i kind of like when they make mulder and doggett bond like okay play nice now#okay fine the ending was very good. unserious episode but this season has been grim so it’s fine#txf lb
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just read ur take on the big three rivalries/relationships and i wanted to know how much u know about djokovics and nadals history with the whole being friendly/sharing an manager/practising together until novak started dominating (the way rafa literally switched from calling him to nole to novak in 2011 specifically after the madrid incident lmao and novak deflecting when asked how their friendship was going at wimbledon that same year) i feel like those two have a lot of history and most people ignore it or just arent aware of it ig
they do have a lot of history! idt they were necessarily THAT friendly with each other pre 2011. nadal was always the wunderkind who djokovic (and murray) were chasing. you had classic young djokovic moments like saying that he was in control of his rg 2006 match with nadal until djokovic's back problems, that he realised he didn't have to do anything special to defeat nadal, that nadal's beatable (nadal won the first two sets 6-4 6-4 before djokovic retired). still one of the funniest things he's said fairs
youtube
but their relationship did clearly get worse in 2011, when djokovic had that phenomenal season and beat nadal all six times they faced each other (still a shame he lost his first match that year at the roland garros semis against federer, denying us the final with nadal everyone wanted to see). there's also obviously stuff like handshake compilations over the years lol
anyway, their relationship also seemingly took a turn for the worse in 2022 over the whole australia deportation drama. I should say that in their early years, big three rivalries were a little more exciting (well, maybe not federer/nadal, but the other two) - it's just that all three of them were increasingly committed to just being ultra respectful *cough* pr merchants *cough* and it limited how much they would even let themselves do anything interesting. nadal can be a bit of a prick who's a lot more amiable when he's winning and is generally more of a sore loser than djokovic, but what's the point if you've collectively taken a vow to not rock the boat? and djokovic, who became massively unpopular for absolutely no good reason, eventually responded to all the criticism and booing with this slightly desperate attempt to make himself loved - the boob throw celebration is obviously the most infamous example and thank god he dropped that a few years ago. which is compelling in itself, but unfortunately it's all considerably less compelling these days... whenever he's being a pantomime villain, it's now about The Establishment.... stuff like this wimbledon where he was being kinda delusional about what the fans were yelling, saying they were booing him when they were calling his opponent's name, which? I like that, I liked the interview, it was silly camp fun. and then it became discourse bloody piers morgan was speaking out on as some kind of grand statement about how djokovic wouldn't let himself be silenced any more. that's not fun!!
anyway, djokovic/nadal is still an all time great tennis rivalry, and I've enjoyed plenty of their matches over the years. just don't think they offered quite enough narrative tension to live up to *59 matches* and monopolising the sport + all the attention within it for like. a lot of years. idk they could've move more imo
#I think I also used to be more invested in them as like. narratives. I too did get hype for the matches#but then at a certain point u get into watching the tennis archives and get into other sports and it's a bit?? okay right#there's so much better material Out There like must we settle for crumbs of narrative intrigue#listen I too can sell pretty much any rivalry if sufficiently motivated but also enough people are doing big three prop#it still doesn't really have a story beyond 'nadal was the wunderkind and djokovic ended up surpassing him'#the most interesting recent thing they've said is when nadal was like yeah djokovic has a compulsion to be best I just focus on The Process#//#batsplat responds#I should really think of a tennis tag hm. this is serious business I fear I need to come up with something I vibe with#also at the end of the day a lot of these opinions are driven by accumulated bitterness#I'm sure you'll be shocked to find out I've been a fan of some of their favourite punching bags over the years#I do think it's a bit criminal to dominate a sport THAT much and be that boring. and god they never stopped#fully believed we were gonna get a cute chaos era post big three but I am now free of even this delusion and don't care anymore#djokovic is so annoying because he could've been super fun but ended up not being that#like the us open 2011 fed match is still some of the coldest shit I've ever seen. that slapped!! kid me very much moved#he's a bit jorge lorenzo coded in some ways if u think about it#but then he'll go around like. taking photos with war criminals and saying weird shit about kosovo and it's kinda. well that's my line yeah
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#anyway fic ramble because I'm stupid and thinking about similarities between my warden and rook because I'm cringe and like#this time it's how they've both been fucked up by mages and kind of... don't really give a shit. and especially don't think they give a shit#in my warden's case. like he just fully goes 'nice woman. real sweet and gave me a cool gift. hope she's okay' which like#okay dudes been through worse but what he's referencing was still kind of messed up and it's clear from how much he gets#freaked out by the ritual later that. yeah it did kind of affect him. but also he looks at morrigan and goes 'woag cool. fren?' and as for#issala. well i mean taius made him into a god damn monster but honestly. taius seems to haunt the narrative for everyone else in#the story a lot more than he does for Issala. even after he remembers The Everything™. like he's fine traveling with Rella and takes in#Anaan without much thought even after he watched her do blood magic and necromancy. like he's more focused on the things#taius made him do and making up for all of that and like. something something him thinking it's his fault something something#anger directed inward into a festering acidic self hate. I'm tired but yeah. just kind of noticing that#original posts
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Miraculous would be sooo much better if the show was like, half as long
#devin speaks#the amazing progress in both the characters and the story in season 5 is so annoying solely because#i know i wouldnt hate the show if it had gotten to this point faster#like yeah okay fine maybe season 1 could be stupid goofy fluff that fleshed out characters#heck maybe even season 2 as well#but i feel like all that has happened shouldve already come about by 3#i feel like there were sooooo many episodes that were *just* about marinette’s stupid antics with adrien#and nothing else#and that got old reeeeal fast#the only and i mean *ONLY* reason i still watch the show now is because ive grown too attached to these characters#and ive watched this show for too long that i cannot stop until it ends#i honestly want to make some ocs that are just the few characters i love stolen from the show so i can love them separately hdcbjsbcjsdcn#marinette and adrien’s stupid love story makes this show so unbearably annoying especially in the first few seasons#like once all the characters relationships were established they shouldve moved on and progressed the story#instead we get like a million episodes reaffirming how marinette’s friends will always be there for her failures#as if that wasnt already obvious after the first like 10#god i wish this show was shorter#gabriel getting the kwamis was the best thing that happened to the show in terms of the narrative#so much has happened since the start of season 5#i thought once ladybug started choosing more superhero allies things would pick up but god it really did take forever to pick up
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okay if you're really cool about things, i can be honest with you. before you read further, decide if you're a girl's girl. if you're cool and actually cool or like not cool.
men don't talk in my book because i was fuckken tired of the way they're the center of every fucking story. i was tired of how every story takes a moment to let them talk. men can shut up for literally one fucking book.
unfortunately not everyone is cool. professionally what i usually say is i didn't want to add violence to the world. the only men in my book are abusers, so they don't get to talk. they don't get to take up space. they ruined my life, they don't get to have their words echo anymore.
because like, yeah! you find practically any story about a person surviving trauma and... there's a man at the center. men are often rescuing us from these things. a "good man" is always standing around, being a good man, proving to the victim that good men are the real men. that her experience was unique rather than universal.
the redacted text has not been taken well by all of my early readers. there is this weird, crouching growl that keeps occurring with men-of-a-certain-age. why don't we hear his side of the story?
when i sat down to write everything that happened to me, i couldn't look at the frank brutality of my abuser's words on a page and think to myself: i actually let him speak like that. i had to redact his words from the manuscript. i then left it redacted. no victim is going to read this book and hear the person who hurt them. it is a book for the victims to speak. abusers shut up challenge, forever. for eternity.
my father once told me, chuckling, i should just have a page of redaction where i let the man just finally talk. it is funny to joke about how we should make a whole page in my book about a man that hurt me. this was not the only time someone commented - it feels like you're hiding things. how do i know you're actually a victim if he doesn't get to speak?
there are books where women aren't even present. i even genuinely like some of those books. like, who doesn't like the hobbit?
i keep running into people defending this imaginary man. the default narrative is so true to some people that they will defend any man, just by virtue of the assumption - "if he's acting like that, you had to push him." certain people need definitive proof that you didn't accidentally make your partner into an abuser. they need to decide if you deserved it, because they want to be able to judge you.
which makes sense, i guess, from a hind brain perspective. if you can figure out "why" someone was cruel, you can protect yourself against it. if you defend the bully, the bully might side with you. i don't really know their explanation for feeling this about a character in a book. trust me, i wrote the guy. he is not going to protect you.
i guess i just - there was a time in my life where i desperately wanted anyone to defend me. where i could have really used someone saying holy shit are you okay instead of what did you say to make him act like that to you.
instead, over dinner, a friend-of-a-friend i just met is pouring herself wine. i heard you wrote a book, she says. she gives me the kind of chilly smile i associate with knives. i heard it's unfair to men.
#the author is nonbinary. don't get fucking weird.#btw if ur a woman and u do this u go to advanced special hell. like if u defend ab*sers at all#u dont get to pretend ur protected from being misogynistic. ur not. we all have internal work.#writeblr#i can't write lately wtf
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FALLING OUT OF FRAME | Part 1
pairing: you x drew starkey
The sound of Drew’s laugh filled the cozy apartment as you scrolled through your phone, settling deeper into the plush couch. It was a laugh you’d heard a thousand times – warm, genuine and utterly infectious. You glanced up to see him standing in the kitchen, stirring pasta sauce in a hoodie that he’d stolen from your side of the closet weeks ago. The sigh made your heart swell.
“How’s it going?” you asked, setting your phone aside.
“Almost done,” Drew said, flashing you a grin over his shoulder. “Hope you’re ready to be impressed by my gourmet skills.”
You chuckled, pulling your knees to your chest. “If it’s anything like last time, I should probably have the takeout app ready.”
Drew pretended to be offended, clutching his chest dramatically. “That was one time! And in my defense, the oven was possessed.”
Moments like this had become your favorite part of life with Drew – quiet, intimate evenings that felt words away from the chaos of Hollywood. For all the glitz and glam of his career, Drew was just Drew with you.
As you watched him carefully plate the pasta, you couldn’t help but feel proud of everything he’d accomplished. His latest role in the Hellraiser reboot was shaping up to be a major career move. And while you knew the spotlights came with challenges, you’d always been his biggest cheerleader.
Later that night, as the two of you lounged on the couch, Drew’s phone buzzed on the coffee table. He glanced at the screen, then sighed.
“It’s my manager,” he said, sitting up. “Give me a sec?”
“Of course,” you said, reaching for the remote to find something to watch.
Drew stepped into the next room, his voice low but audible enough for snippets to carry over.
“…. Press tours…. Odessa …. Chemistry angle?”
You tried to focus on the TV, but your curiosity got the better of you. Odessa A’Zion – Drew’s new co-star. You’d seen her name pop up recently in articles about the movie, paired with glowing reviews of her talent and personality. She seemed nice enough in interviews – bold and charming in a way that made you feel a little plain by comparison.
“Everything okay?” you asked, placing a comforting hand on his arm.
“Yeah,” he said, but his tone wasn’t convincing. “Just.. movie stuff. Our team thinks Odessa and I need to lean into the whole co-star chemistry thing for the press.”
“Chemistry thing?” you echoed, your brow furrowing.
“It’s all PR,” Drew said quickly, his hands finding yours. “They’re talking about a few staged photo ops, maybe some friendly banter during interviews. You know how it goes.”
You nodded slowly, even as an uneasy feeling settled in your chest. You did know how it went – Hollywood loved its narratives, and the lines between fiction and reality often blurred.
“It’s nothing to worry about,” Drew added, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “You’re the one I love, Y/N. Not Odessa. Never Odessa.”
You smiled softly, but the words didn’t erase the knot in your stomach.
The first set of paparazzi photos hit the internet like a wildfire: Drew and Odessa at a café, leaning across the table as if sharing a secret. Her laugh was captured mid-burst, her hand grazing his arm.
The headlines were just as dramatic as you’d feared: Drew Starkey and Odessa A ‘Zion’s Off-Screen Chemistry is Off the Charts!
You scrolled through the photos on your phone, bile rising in your throat. They were clearly staged, every angle too perfect to be a coincidence. But that didn’t make it easier to stomach.
The worst part was the comments. Fans fawned over the “new power couple”, dissecting every detail of their interactions. People who had once rooted for you and Drew now seemed eager to erase you from the narrative entirely.
When Drew came home that night, you tried to play it cool, but your unease must’ve shown.
“Hey” he said, dropping his bag by the door and crossing the room to kiss your forehead. “You okay?”
“Mmm, fine” you said, forcing a smile.
Drew studied you for a moment before glancing at your phone. His face fell as he recognized the photos.
“Y/N, I –“
“It’s okay,” you interrupted, setting the phone aside. “I know it’s just PR. It’s your job.”
Drew sat beside you, his hands wrapping around yours. “It doesn’t mean anything,” he said firmly. “You’re the one I come home to. You’re the one I love.”
You wanted to believe him. But as Drew kissed your temple and pulled you into his arms, the unease lingered, whispering doubts you weren’t ready to face.
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