#okay well technically

[aluminumneedles]

I'm knitting in the corner at a party

and guys my age stop by to tell me I remind them of their aunt, of their grandmother. This is a compliment and I take it as such. They confess to having tried crochet once, and I smile. They get back in line for the bathroom.

I'm knitting in the corner at a party and a queer woman sits on the floor next to me, arranges her skirt, and smiles up at me. (I try not to blush.) She asks me all the questions on her mind about my craft and I answer them, hands still moving. We swap yarn sources. She doesn't stay, but she knows where to find me.

I'm knitting in the corner at a party and everyone knows where to find me when they need a minute, when socializing is too much and the music is too loud and they need to catch their breath. They pretend to be checking in on me, which is sweet, but I can see the relief in their eyes the moment they stop performing for a house full of people. They sit down and tell me things and all the while they never take their eyes off my hands.

The party has wound down and I'm still knitting and the hosts, two guys in their twenties, thank me for "helping to curate the vibe." I had no idea that's what I was doing. I leave the party having forgotten to drink anything and without that woman's number but with many rows added to my top-down raglan sweater. I call it a night, and a good one.

[pokimoko]

Asexual bird? Please

How about two asexual birds?

[technically-human]

Hey, don't cry. Ghost yuri, okay?

(Now that you know the girls, they need to meet the boys!)

[bacchuschucklefuck]

soon it'll be dawn again

transcript under the cut ⏬

page 01

Fig: no way? - you're still up?

Riz: Wh– yes?

Riz: Why'd I not be.

page 02

Fig: I me~~ean - that took.

Fig: whole day.

Riz: Yeah?

Fig: 'm beat.

Riz: you should sleep.

page 03

Fig: nah. my guy's still up

Fig: I wanna hang out.

page 04

Riz: That's really nice.

Fig: Hah! - Nobody ever expects an Archdevil rockstar to be nice.

Riz: … yeah. - 's just budget work tho. (the stuff I'm working on) - I've heard it's boring.

page 05

Fig: yeah, but you do it…

Riz: It keeps things going, right? - Nothing happens if nobody sits down and - does the thing.

Fig: That's right… - though. Yeah.

page 06

Fig: sometimes it's someone else who - doesn't want the same thing to happen.

Riz: … - mm.

page 07

Riz (off screen): …It took me a long time to get that not everyone likes doing what I do. - 's probably because you guys are so nice– - or. - kind.

Riz (off screen): to anyone too, not just. - the people you /love/.

page 08

Riz: that's not how it is elsewhere. - The world's– not. hostile. - but 's not like it's kind.

Riz: So I'm doing as much as I can now… 

page 09

Fig: Hey.

Riz: ?

Fig: Go dig some dirt with me.

page 10

Riz: [blank speech bubble] - oh you meant like - actual dirt. (not incriminating information)

Fig: o yea.

Fig: there's clay in the backyard soil. - sometimes when I'm sun deficient or something I go touch dirt for a bit.

page 11

Fig: here u go

page 12

Riz: uh

Fig: now we make a thing! - 'm pretty good at freehanding a bowl.

Fig: I'll show u

page 13

Fig: just– yep, flatten that out as evenly as u can, then–! - actually ur nails'd be so good at cutting out the strip. [larger than usual space] wait. - wait. wait u can carve patterns with them! we HAVE to try

Riz: uh - What. do I carve?

Fig: anything!!!

page 14

Fig: and– yep just seal the inside uh. seam?

Fig: yep that works - okay time's up! all contestant hands up

Riz: [blank speech bubble] - okay - wh. what's next?

Fig: haha - watch this.

(sound effect text): FWOO—MP

page 15

Riz: WH– DON'T JUST DO THAT???

Fig: Now it's fired!

Riz: THAT WAS NOT SAFE

Fig: (actually it's just dry. if u add water rn it'll dissolve)

Fig: ok catch!

Riz: [blank speech bubble] - careful!!

Fig: dw no need haha

page 16

Riz (thought bubble): oh - it's warm…

Fig: now I want you to throw this.

page 17

Fig: u gotta do it - c'mon

page 18

Riz: wh– - It's like 3AM right now

Fig: oh it's not /fired/ fired it's not gonna make a loud noise

Riz: And then just? leave a pile out here?

Fig: pour water over it & it'll be gone I told u

Riz: but

page 19

Fig (off screen): RIz.

page 20

Fig: I've done all this before.

Fig: Can you trust that at least?

page 21

Riz: no, I– - I do. - I trust you.

page 23

Riz: okay what happens now

(sound effect text): glob

page 24

Fig: we do it again!

page 25

Riz: wh. [larger than usual space] What do you mean. (this clay's too wet also)

Fig: see! you're already learning

Fig: [blank speech bubble] - there are flows that are futile to fight. - The world changes.

Fig: Things change.

page 26

Fig: I've learned my lessons with "forevers". - But - as an artist

Fig: I can give you one thing: - You can always do it again.

page 27

Fig: most of everything depends on the rest of the world, - but this. - making new. - that's yours as long as you want it.

page 28

Fig: So?

page 29

Riz: Yeah. - Yeah! - let's make another one.

[benevolenterrancy]

honestly. if you decided to create giant fucking corpse-head-spiders to populate your world with then this is exactly what you deserve.

[prokopetz]

One of the more entertaining consequences of broadcast standards for children's media during the 1980s is that villains weren't allowed to express or directly imply the desire or intent to kill the protagonist, but they were allowed to openly state their intention to eat the protagonist – provided that at least one of the hero or the villain were non-human.

(i.e., human villain expressing the desire to eat a non-human protagonist: okay; unambiguously monstrous villain expressing the desire to eat a human protagonist: okay; human villain expressing the desire to eat a human protagonist: not okay.)

This often led to interesting characterisation choices, like Shredder's strange preoccupation with making the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles into soup in the 1987 series – he's not allowed to threaten to kill them, but he can freely threaten to eat them!

[unrealward]

future lifeform (2020)

[thunderstomm]

“Cosmo, Wanda, I wish we could go to Monster High!” ✨

Monster High and Fairly OddParents: A New Wish are the best shows airing on Nick atm, and and I need them to make more shows like these (:

[spiderdramaqueen]

day 2 - broken

[nyssasatelier]

the iliad

(first 20 pages poorly summarized)

~

Agamemnon : *takes a girl hostage*

Priest of Apollo : Give me back my daughter please I'll pay whatever ransom you want 😔

The army : Hell yeah! Money! We need that!

Agamemnon : No. Now take your shit and fuck off.

The army : *sigh*

Priest of Apollo : Apollo please kill these guys 🥺

Apollo : Anything for a homie😎 *starts killing people*

~

Achilles: You fucked up. Apollo wants to kill us all.

Agamemnon : No i didn't. 😤

Achilles : Okay so i brought a prophet to tell us who did. Don't kill him. 🙄

Agamenon : okay alright sure. 😁

Calchus : It was you 🫵 Agamenon, you fucked up.

Agamemnon : ... Why you little- 🤬

Achilles : Now that we know you fucked up- 😌

Agamemnon : No i didn't! 😡

Calchus : You kind of did-

Agamemnon : Shut up i literally never liked you. 😡

Achilles : Why don't you just undo your fuck up? 😡

Agamemnon : Shut up Achilles, I don't need you here!

Achilles: Alright then, i'll go home. I quit. 🤨

Agamemnon: ... You can't quit! I fire you! 🤬

Achilles: I ALREADY QUIT YOU DUMB BITCH 🤬

~

Also Achilles immediately afterwards: Mommy I'm being bullied make Zeus avenge me 🥺

His mom (who is a god) : my poor baby boy! 🥺💔

His mom : Zeus curse these people >:(

Zeus : eh....i don't really want to 🥱

Hera : Don't do it! :0

Zeus : SHUT UP I DO WHAT I WANT!!! 🤬

~

Meanwhile Odysseus : Yo i brought your daughter back! :D

The Priest of Apollo and his daughter : Yippee :D

Odysseus and the men : *Start sacrificing animals so apollo stops killing them*

Apollo: hmm ... :|

Odysseus and the men : *Have a barbecue and karaoke sleep over at Apollos temple*

Apollo : FUCK YEAH LETS GO :D

[kurthummeldeservesbetter]

Thinking about how Jayce was literally all for using the hexcore to save Viktor before he even did it. like. of course he was gonna use it. he literally got Heimerdinger fired for (turns out, rightfully) wanting them to destroy it and his main argument to the hamster is that it could save Viktor. He literally even discusses this with Viktor on their little ledge place.

He’s really just like the non-warcrimes/ethical (sort of?) version of Singed. Would do anything to save the one he loves with the thing that literally killed someone else.

Hell the last he saw of it was it killed a plant before he even heard it killed Sky. (Also man asked no questions about her at all wtf Jayce literally did not give a shit about anyone besides Viktor turns out) What did he think was gonna happen actually?

God he’s such a disaster I love him

[folfar]

A scientific consideration of cultural preservation in Gideon the Ninth

HYPOTHESIS: the Venus de Milo is in Canaan House

REASONING: John is keen on decoration (the rest of Canaan House, the Mithraeum, his fancy baby-bone crown). John has strong opinions on preserving things he considers ‘worthy’ (the earth, his friends, Shakespeare). Why not famous art? Canaan House is filled with old and rotting portraits - they can’t ALL be of Cyrus and Valancy.

EVIDENCE:

There was a single statue at the end of the corridor where it turned left. It must have once been a person, but the head and arms had been lopped off, leaving only a torso with beseeching stumps. - GtN p130-1 (when Gideon is looking for Harrow)

beseeching stumps?? It’s simply got to be the Venus de Milo. No stumps plead more tenderly:

But she has a head! I hear you protest.

Aha! Now we come to Palamedes and Camilla doing psychometry to figure out the age of Canaan House:

"Fiat lux! If you want to talk improbable, let's talk about this"-a scrape of stone on stone-"being three thousand and some years older than this." A heavy clunk.

About 3000 years older than another part of Canaan House? Hmm! And what’s that Camilla is holding?

“Standing next to him holding a big wedge of broken sculpture and the flashlight was a tall, equally grey-wrapped figure with a scabbard outlined at her hip.”

“The cavalier narrowed her hooded eyes, fidgets gone and absolutely still; then she exploded into action. She dropped the wedge of sculpture with a clonk, drew her sword from its shabby scabbard before the wedge had bounced once, and advanced.”

SCULPTURE!

CONCLUSION: the Venus de Milo IS in Canaan House! However, it was decapitated by known practical thinker and simp Camilla Hect so that Palamedes Sextus could do his carbon dating easier without tiring out his necromancer noodle arms

SECONDARY CONCLUSION: Camilla was going to use the head of the Venus de Milo to bash open the laboratory hatch

[fourfanetc]

quick sketches of an office au

[cowboy-robooty]

watched brokeback mountain yesterday.... mid as fuck. i think it wouldve played out a lot better if the main characters were yuri and jimmy from yarichin bitch club. do u see my vision?

[the-rainbow-of-doom]

This homo loves a good railing!

[meamiki]

vtuber loop !!!

[reverse entry au? the reverse isekai part of it? tangentially related to this post here, and also the last part of this post too]