#okay they got that swamp serve

[celestialulu]

i realllyyyy love this lucy outfit

[shmaptainwrites]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 [𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐒𝐎𝐍]

PAIRINGS — James Wilson x fem!Reader

SUMMARY — It was never Reader's plan to be a single mother to a newborn child, but a longtime friend steps in and before long they both have the family they've always wanted, the only catch: they're still just friends

WORD COUNT — 13.6K

WARNINGS — mentions of pregnancy and birth, breastfeeding (like non descriptive? does this need to be a warning?)

NOTE — Okay this fic has been in the works for a while and I have been swamped with school so I'm so happy I'm finally able to post something because it's literally been a full-ass month since I last came out with anything ._. hoping once finals are over I can get back into my writing groove and give some of my ideas the attention they deserve!

Middle photo credit goes to @shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey

“Are you sure this is okay?” you looked back while holding a baby carrier in both hands. 

“Like I told you back at the hospital, and in the car, and then again in the car, I promise this is okay,” James assured you, following right behind, bags under each arm. “You just went through a 40 hour labour, did you really think it would be a smart move to come home alone?”

He was right about that, physically you were exhausted, you were sure how much longer you could keep your eyes open. 

“Go take a shower, I’ll look after her until you get out,” he suggested. “If you had a support person here you would have taken shifts.”

“I know, but you have a life James,” you sighed. “One that didn’t involve your friend getting pregnant and then taking care of her.”

“Would it make it any better if I told you I really don’t mind? I like spending time with you, it’s why we’ve been friends for so long,” he put the bags down by the table and then placed a hand on your shoulder. 

“James, I love you, but I’m going to be brutally honest because my filter has vanished. This is what happens to all your wives, all your girlfriends. I really don’t need that happening to us too,” you said. 

“It won’t,” he pressed. “Come on, just take the shower. I know you want to.”

You sighed, “Alright, but I’m not gonna call for you to come in the middle of the night and every which time of day. If you want to come and see us, do it of your own accord and if you don’t want to then don’t,” you emphasized. “Do what you want, not what you think I want.”

“If I say I will, will you go take a shower?” James asked and you rolled your eyes at him. 

“Don’t drop my baby while I’m in there, okay?” you pointed at him. “You still owe me for that vase you broke.” 

“You mean the tacky one your crappy ex-boyfriend’s mom gave you? I think I did you a favour there.” 

“You’re insufferable sometimes, you know?” you said carefully putting the carrier down in the living room and looking down at your resting daughter for a moment before heading towards your room. 

“I love you too,” he said simply, replacing you by her side and keeping a close eye on her while she slept. 

You had to admit, it was a relief to be able to step into the shower, knowing there was someone you trusted outside looking after the small human you were now fully responsible for. At least before dealing with the stress and everything that would come afterwards you’d be able to be clean. 

When you came out of your bedroom after your shower, dressed in the most comfortable clothes you could find lying around, you saw James in the kitchen, the carrier now propped up on the table while he unpacked something from some grocery bags. 

“I was craving Indian, do you want some?” he asked. 

“Of course I do, the food at your hospital sucks, hand it over,” you put your hand out and he gave you a bowl so you could serve yourself some rice and curry. “She’s still asleep?” 

“Woke up once, but I got her to fall back asleep pretty easily. She might get hungry soon though too.” 

“So I should eat while I still have the chance,” you sat down at the island and began munching on the food, turning around the carrier so you could see your daughter. 

It was interesting, she’d been around only for a short few days but you could barely ever take your eyes off her. 

“Did you pick a name for her yet?” James asked, leaning over the table and eating his portion of dinner. 

“I think so,” you nodded. “I was between two when she was born, but now that I look at her she fits one better than the other.” 

“So what’s the winner?” 

“Liana,” you smiled and brushed your fingers along her small curled toes. “It suits her doesn’t it?” 

“I think it does,” he nodded. “You made a pretty cute baby.” 

“I made a very cute baby, thank you very much,” you scoffed with a chuckle. “You think you could do better?” 

“Well I don’t have a uterus so I don’t think we’ll ever be able to find out,” he shook his head. “Shame, I probably would have demolished you.” 

“As if,” you laughed, continuing to eat more food just as Liana began to stir awake. “And there’s my cue.” 

You stood up and carefully took her out of the carrier, cautious of supporting her neck before moving over to the couch where you could comfortably feed her. 

“Once you’re done I’ll burp her,” James said. “So you can keep eating.” 

“Sure,” you nodded. “Got practice from your med school days?” 

“Yeah, actually,” he nodded. “I thought originally I might specialize in working in the NICU so I spent a lot of time in the maternity ward.” 

“What made you change your mind?” you asked. 

“I would have burnt out,” he admitted. “Seeing babies and spending time with them is one thing, but seeing them sick and sometimes not get better? It’s a lot harder than you’d imagine.” 

You hummed thoughtfully, “You would have been good in that department if you decided to go that route. I think at least.” 

“Really, why do you think so?” 

“James, you’ve always been great with kids and parents. Don’t you remember how we met?” 

He chuckled to himself, “Summer camp days. Yeah, you really did have to know your way around both.” 

“You somehow managed, as a nineteen-year-old, to calm a child who was freaking out about staying away from home and dealing with an unhappy parent of a different child. I think your people skills just got better as you got older.” 

“I don’t think there’s much in life that trains you to deal with crises as much as being a camp counsellor.” 

“You can test your skills with Liana and see if you’ve still got the magic when it comes to babies,” you teased, followed by a yawn. 

“Trust me, I definitely do,” he assured you. “Babies love me.”

“And do you love babies?”

“I do, and I think I’m gonna end up loving yours a little more than most,” he admitted. 

“Good, she’s gonna need it,” you sighed. “I’m gonna need it.”

There was a pause for a moment before James spoke up again,

“Have you talked to him since the break up?” he asked and you shook your head, feeling the tears develop in your eyes. 

“I don’t really want to talk about it, not right now,” you whispered, looking down at Liana again. 

James did not peg your boyfriend as the abandoning type, but after he had coaxed the news out of you during one of your visits, he could see how much it crushed you to think of what lied ahead. Not because you didn’t want a child, but because Liana was all you wanted and you thought you were on the same page as your partner, but when it came down to things he couldn’t hold up the mask he’d been wearing any longer. 

“You should talk about it sometime though, right?” James said softly. “Doesn’t have to be with me, but you’ve been so laser focused on getting through the past nine months you haven’t really processed what happened.”

Liana had since finished feeding and you carried her over to the kitchen island, passing James a burp cloth that he could drape across his shoulder before taking her from your hands, after you pressed a small kiss to her forehead. 

“Not sure if I want to process it,” you admitted. “I’d rather focus on her.”

“And I’d rather you take care of yourself so you don’t crash and burn,” he said. 

You knew he was right, but it was nicer to pretend you were alone from start to finish than even imagining the possibility that someone was supposed to be with you through everything. The doctors appointments, the morning sickness, the preparation. 

Instead you ended up feeling like a burden to your friends who had gone out of their way to help you and be there for you. 

“Okay,” you nodded simply. “I’ll do it for you and her then.”

“It’ll end up being for you in the end,” he assured. “But just…trust me on this okay?”

“I do,” you smiled. “Just like I trust you with her.”

You finished eating your dinner while James took care of Liana and even managed to get her to go back to sleep. It seemed that even though she’d only been in the world a short while, she felt just as safe in his arms as she did in yours.

“You can put her down if you want. I have a cot set up in my room,” you pointed. 

“I’m alright like this,” he shook his head. “I’ll hold her until you’re done then I’ll leave you guys so you can get some sleep.”

Considering how hungry you were, it didn't take that much longer for you to finish eating and while you cleared up the dishes, James went and put Liana down in her bed and then gathered his things so he could give you some time alone. 

“I’ll see you around, James. Thanks for coming to help today,” you gave him a big hug and he held you tight in that way he would when he wanted to say something, but knew it should probably wait. 

“Anytime,” he gave you an additional squeeze. “You’re gonna be a great mom. You are a great mom already. I’m really happy for you.” 

You couldn’t bring yourself to say any words in response so you just nodded your head and held onto him tighter. After a moment he pulled away and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. 

“Love you, now go get some sleep.” 

“You’ve got it Dr. Wilson,” you saluted him. 

You walked him out of the door and after closing it shut behind him you took a deep breath. It was going to be hard, but you could do it. 

—

A few months later…

“Don’t you have a life?” you yawned, bouncing Liana in your arms to try and get her to fall asleep. 

“I mean I went bowling with House last night and I consistently stay late at work, and that’s about it, so no,” James shook his head. 

“So you figured that coming and bothering me is a good use of your spare time.” 

“I wouldn’t call it bothering,” James gave you a look. “I made you dinner.” 

“Yeah you did, and unfortunately it was really good too,” you sighed. “So you just want to hang out with me and Liana?”

“Yeah, is that so hard to believe?”

“A little considering I always have baby vomit on me now,” you chuckled. 

“It brings out your eyes,” he teased. “Here, why don’t I take her.”

“Last time I agreed to that you riled her up, which I didn’t think was possible for a three month old,” you eyed him skeptically. 

“I promise I’ll put her to sleep,” he crossed his heart. 

“Wrong religion, James,” you shook your head and he laughed. 

“Do you want me to swear on the Torah?”

“It would help,” you nodded. 

“Alright, I swear on the Torah that I won’t rile her up.”

You reluctantly passed Liana over to James and scoffed when she almost immediately stopped fussing. 

“See,” he smiled and kissed her small nose while he rocked her gently, making her eyes slowly close as she fell asleep. 

“You two are in kahoots. She’s fine whenever you’re not around, but when you are it’s like she knows she can get passed off to you if she’s fussy enough,” you laughed a little. “It’s cute though, I like how much she likes you.”

“Me too, why do you think I keep coming here?” 

“So you came to visit, what do you want to do?” you asked. “My plans were to clean the kitchen and do laundry, so not much more exciting than sitting around at home.”

“Why don’t you let me put her down then we can tackle the kitchen together. I mean I did make half of the mess there.”

“I won’t argue with you there,” you sighed and put your hands on your hips. “Okay, I’m gonna throw a load in before you put her down.” 

It took a little bit for James to be confident Liana was fully asleep before putting her down in her cot and then meeting you again in the kitchen where you were packing up leftovers from dinner. 

“Have you had many visitors?” James asked. 

“Well, I do have this one guy that keeps coming around, about this tall, practicing oncology, I think he’s a little bit obsessed with me,” you joked. 

“Aside from me,” he shook his head and went over to the dishes. 

“Yeah, a few. My parents were here for a bit while you were out of town and then some of my friends have come around to help with a few things here and there and to meet Liana.”

“Nice.”

“You sound like you want to say something,” you looked back at him. 

“It’s not too much having me over all the time, is it?”

“No, not at all,” you shook your head. “You know me, I’d tell you if it was.”

“Because I really do like spending time with you both. It’s a lot nicer than going to an empty house at the end of the day,” he admitted. “So if you don’t mind, maybe I can keep bothering you and making a mess in your kitchen.”

“I think that would be okay,” you smiled. 

You cleaned in silence for a bit before James began asking a few questions about Liana. 

“She had an appointment with her pediatrician recently, right? Everything went okay?”

“Yeah, fit as a fiddle,” you sighed. “Thank goodness.”

“Have you decided if you’re gonna use formula yet? Or will you wait it out?”

“I was actually going to ask you about this, whenever I ask anyone I think has an opinion I’d like to hear they say I need to make the decision myself and then everyone I don’t want to hear from seems to have something to say,” you chuckled. “What do you think? As a doctor?”

“I mean, if I were in your situation I might wait a bit longer, she’s still pretty young and there’s no real reason to switch over yet. I think a lot of people start maybe around 12 months and from what I’ve seen that works well,” he shrugged. 

“Thanks for giving me a straight answer,” you placed a hand on his arm. “I also don’t know if I should try and take leave from work or hire a nanny, but I think I probably have to figure that one out myself.”

“Do you have enough savings to take the time off?” he asked. 

“I get a few more months paid leave from the company I work for since I have seniority, but after that I have to figure out what to do. I think I have enough saved to last me some time, but I’m going to have to go back eventually.”

James hummed thoughtfully. 

“Do you wanna come up with solutions tonight or relax now that we’ve finished cleaning?” he asked, motioning his head to the kitchen that was definitely in better shape than before. 

“Let’s watch a movie or something, I don’t think I’ve turned the TV on since Liana was born. I’ll fold the laundry when it’s done while we watch,” you said. “I’ll figure something out later.”

“We should watch, oh jeez what’s that thing we started ages ago and never finished?”

“The really bad soap?” you asked and he nodded, “Oh yes, we’re definitely watching that.”

“Okay, you go get settled, I’m gonna make some tea, do you want some?”

“Sure, just make me whatever you’re having,” you nodded and grabbed the remote from under the pile of blankets on the couch, turning on the TV and trying to find the episodes you had recorded to watch later. 

By the time James had finished making the tea, you had found the show and were just about to start it. 

“Here,” James passed you the mug. “So what was the last thing that happened?”

“I think the main guy was sleeping with the head nurse, right and then there was the whole thing with her being engaged to the other surgeon and then her sister was in a coma?” 

“Wait, I thought the surgeon she was engaged to was sleeping with one of his patients?” 

“He was,” you nodded. “It was a whole thing.”

“Alright, just start it, I’m sure I’ll remember more as we watch.”

James was very sorely mistaken, if anything he’d gotten more confused and you were absolutely no help because nothing was making sense anymore. 

“What is up with the writing?” you asked. “Like did they just completely forget they had a whole storyline dedicated to this huge procedure and now they’re acting like nothing happened.”

“Don’t get me started, that guy was doing surgery without gloves, like that doesn’t even take much effort to get right. You’d think it was common sense,” James added. 

“Maybe we should turn it off,” you looked over at your friend, “it’s getting us all riled up.”

James pressed his lips together, “I know, but I kind of want to find out who’s the father of Paula’s baby.”

You leaned back into the couch, you had managed to fold all the laundry, and it was still a little too early to go to sleep, you supposed a few more episodes couldn’t hurt. 

“If I fall asleep, just lock up on your way out, okay?” you looked over at him and he nodded as you started the next episode. 

Just as you predicted, about halfway through the second episode you began to drift off, and as soon as James noticed, he stopped the episode already having decided you could finish it together another time. 

He shifted you slightly so you were lying down on the couch instead of in the uncomfortable position you were in before, placing a blanket over top of you. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your cheek, wishing you a good night before going to check on Liana, and after seeing she was sleeping soundly and the baby monitor was on, he saw himself out, taking your spare key from where it was hidden on the porch and locking the door. 

—

“How’s my girl doing?” James grinned, scooping Liana out of your arms. “I haven’t seen you in so long,” he kissed her nose making her giggle. 

“James, you were here two days ago,” you laughed. 

“And it feels like an eternity.”

You crossed your arms over your chest, “She’s got you wrapped around her finger.”

“I don’t mind,” he shrugged. “Just as long as we get to spend time together.”

“Yeah, well she hasn’t napped yet so it can wait until after that,” you reached to take her back but James insisted he could put her to sleep. “James, you just got off work are you sure you don’t want to eat something or take a break for a bit?”

“This is like a break for me,” he assured you. 

“Okay, I’m gonna make a salad, come out and eat when you’re done.”

James nodded and went off to the bedroom so he could sit on the armchair there and coax her to sleep. 

Usually he didn’t need more than twenty minutes to half an hour to put her down, so when you were hitting the forty-five minute mark you wondered if Liana was being fussy, so you went to check in on them, instead seeing James fast asleep on the armchair with Liana snuggled against his chest. 

You bit back a big smile and went to go grab your camera quickly, and quietly snapped a shot of the two of them. 

Not wanting to wake either of them, you made your way back to the kitchen, shutting the door of the room behind you to make sure the sound didn’t travel. 

Figuring it might be a while before James came back out, you decided to eat your dinner, that way you could take Liana from him when they woke up so he could get something to eat too. 

As you had predicted, James exited the room about an hour later, Liana now awake and hungry for her own dinner. 

“Want me to take her now?” you teased and he rolled his eyes while you took your baby from him, sitting on the couch to feed her while he grabbed himself something to eat. “You had a good nap?”

“Great actually, I think I needed it. Been pulling a lot of late nights at the office getting paperwork done,” he admitted. “I’m surprised you didn’t wake me.”

“You looked comfortable, I didn’t want to bother you.”

“Well, I appreciate it cause I needed the sleep,” he sighed and came and sat next to you while he began to eat his dinner. 

“James, I…I tried to talk to him the other week,” you said, knowing he would be able to connect the dots back to your ex. “I’d been meaning to tell you, it just slipped my mind I guess.”

“You did…what did he say?”

“God, I’m gonna start crying again,” you let out a humourless chuckle and lifted a hand to wipe away the tears beginning to form in your eyes. “It doesn’t matter what he said. What matters is that it was probably good that we broke up. He wouldn’t have been a good father or husband for that matter when it came down to it.”

“I’m proud of you for reaching out anyways. It takes a lot of guts to do that after someone leaves you.”

You nodded your head, “I’m just…I know I said you should keep coming here because you want to, but I really do like having you around. It just makes it seem simpler. Easier,” you looked over at him. “You’re a good friend Jamie, I love you.”

“Love you too,” he leaned over and pressed a kiss to your forehead, watching as your attention turned back to your daughter as she finished feeding. 

You held her just like that in your arms for a little while longer, watching as she reached out for your fingers and then tried to go even further to grab James. Clearly her attention was addictive because he was ready to put his food down to help burp her, but you made a teasing remark about him hogging her and that he needed to eat his food so you’d take care of it and he could have her when he was done. 

Eventually, you traded Liana for James’ dishes and went to load the dishwasher while he kept her occupied, letting her gnaw on his tie while making all sorts of nonsensical baby noises that James took as conversation starters. 

It was funny to watch the two have what looked like a full blown conversation and you were sure James had been reading some parenting magazine or another that spoke of helping babies develop linguistic abilities. 

“Hey James,” you crossed your arms over your chest, leaning against the wall. 

“Yeah?”

“Do you want a key?”

“A key to what?” he looked at you confused. 

“The house,” you said. “I just thought since you’re here all the time you can come and go whenever you want and if you forget something and I’m out you can come get it yourself.”

“A key,” he thought about it. “This feels like a big milestone moment.”

“I mean I already have the key to your place, but that was because you refused to have anyone look after you after you got your wisdom teeth removed.”

“Wait, you have my key?” 

“Yeah, I just took yours and had it copied,” you shrugged. 

“I feel like I should be a bit more concerned about this, but I’m not.”

“It’s because you’re friends with House, you’re used to it,” you waved him off. 

“Liana, did you know your mom’s a thief?” he looked down at the baby in his arms and you rolled your eyes. 

“Do you want the key or not?” 

“I’ll take it, and I guess you can keep mine, but I’m never there anyways.”

“It’s okay, I’ll just use it if I need to steal your social insurance card to commit identity theft.”

“Liana banana, your mom’s being very silly tonight,” James picked her up and held her out in front of him before bringing her down to press a few kisses to her face, making her giggle. “It’s okay, we still love mommy even though she’s silly, right?”

“You better,” you flicked his shoulder as you walked by after grabbing an ice cream sandwich from the freezer. 

“Hey, I’ve got something in my bag I forgot to give you, do you mind bringing it over here?” James asked, motioning to the briefcase on the armchair closest to the front door. 

You nodded your head and stood up again to grab it and pass it to him. He rummaged through it with one hand while still holding Liana before passing you what looked like a receipt. 

“Uh thanks?” you looked a little confused. 

“Read what it’s for,” James chuckled. “They’ll get delivered next week.” 

“James,” you put the receipt down. “You didn’t.” 

“You’ve been talking about it for four months, I had to do something,” he shrugged. “And I didn’t get you anything for your baby shower.” 

“Because you planned it,” you laughed. “Seriously this is a lot. I don’t know if I can accept this.” 

“Just think of it this way. I’m here all the time, we like to go out with Liana together and it’s a great stroller with good safety ratings.” 

“Okay sure you’ll use that, but the cot too?” 

“The one you have in there’s been recalled, I was just doing you a favour,” he said. 

You chuckled a little, pressing your lips together. “Liana, my darling, we are very spoiled.” 

“I’ll come over when it gets delivered and help set it up,” James said. 

“I still don’t know what to say, James, this is…really generous of you.” 

“Believe me, right now nothing makes me happier, and I mean that,” he reached out a hand to you and you took it, giving it a gentle squeeze. 

As promised, the next week James was back at your home to help set up the stroller and the cot and you figured it would be the right time to pull out that camcorder your father had gotten you to help record some memories you were making with Liana. 

“Hey, James wanna tell the camera what you’re doing?” 

“Wondering why I didn’t get a degree in engineering apparently.” he mumbled while hunched over some instructions, a pencil behind his ear and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. 

“What does your assistant think?” you moved the camera over to Liana, sitting in a rocking seat that was propped up next to James. 

“That this video isn’t going to be very good for my image in the future. This stuff is worse than IKEA,” he scratched the back of his head. 

“You’re doing great,” you assured him and came to give him an encouraging side hug. “Alright, let me stop this video and we can try and tackle it together.” 

You put the camera down on the bed and looked over the instructions with James, having a bit of an easier time piecing things together compared to him, so in the end you were put on deciphering the instructions while he assembled the cot. 

An embarrassing amount of time later, the cot was completely assembled (only after having to disassemble it all the first time because there was one piece left over and you had no idea what step you had missed using it), and you carefully placed Liana inside to see how it would hold up. 

“You know they say you can be proud of something you built with your own two hands, but I’m afraid this is going to fall apart,” James said. 

“We followed the instructions really carefully, it should be fine,” you said, trying to convince yourself. “And Liana looks comfortable in there, look at her she’s giggling.” 

“I think that’s because we look like we’ve been building a house or something,” he looked between you, seeing your dirty clothes and messed up hair. 

“Who knew putting together a cot would be so labour intensive,” you chuckled. “I think we can safely say we deserve some takeout. What do you want?” 

“Anything, I’m starving,” James sat down on the edge of the bed. “You think this will help her sleep a little better?” 

“Let’s hope so,” you rubbed your temples. “You coming?” you asked, taking Liana out of the cot and carrying her out towards the door. 

“Yeah, I’ll be out in a minute,” he nodded and you left him in the room, staring at the wooden baby’s bed in front of him. It was a simple thing you had both made together, but for James, it was starting to feel like so much more than just that. 

You built a cot, but what did building a cot mean? What did it mean that he bought it for you without a second question or a moment’s hesitation? What did it mean that he couldn’t seem to wipe the smile off his face every single time he stepped into this house? 

It probably meant a lot of things, but at the moment, to James, it felt like he had a family and he’d hold onto that for as long as he was able to. 

—

As much as you wished it could be, not every day was easy. Today was one of those days at the end of a long week and you wanted nothing more than to collapse and call it quits. 

Something was wrong with Liana, she was never this fussy, but all the doctors would just repeat the same thing over and over again. 

She has colic. 

You have a colic-y baby. 

Your baby has colic. She’s going to be fine.

She didn’t sound fine. Not when she would cry and cry and you didn’t know what was happening or how to make her feel better. It made your heart feel tight and constricted especially when all you could do was bounce and rock her in hopes that it might soothe whatever was going on inside her. 

You were so focused on the sounds of the crying baby you didn’t hear the door unlock as James entered the house. After putting down his bags, he followed the sound of the crying before finding you in the rocking chair in your room, gently hushing Liana to try and coax her back to sleep. 

“James,” you tried to stand up when you noticed he was there, but he rushed over to your side, placing a hand on your shoulder and encouraging you to sit back down. “I’m afraid we’re not really having a fun day today. You might want to just go home and rest,” you suggested. 

“What’s going on?” he asked. 

“James, I’m serious I-,” 

“Hey,” he said gently, quieting you as a hand came to hold your cheek. “Talk to me, mom. What’s happening?” 

You pressed your lips together and shook your head. 

“I don’t know,” you let the tears spill from your eyes, just as they were for Liana, but you basked in the comfort James’ simple action offered. “She just keeps crying and I don’t know what’s wrong. T-They kept saying she has colic, but this isn’t colic, James.” 

He nodded his head and wiped away your tears while trying to think of a solution to the problem in front of you. 

“I have an idea, just give me a second, I’ll be right back.” 

James went off to the kitchen and came back with a bit of a white powder on his finger. He helped you sit Liana up before getting her to eat a little bit of it. 

“What is that?” 

“Just baking soda. I saw this in a few babies. Doctors think it’s colic, but it’s reflux. Have you been eating anything different from usual?” he asked. 

“Me?” 

“Yeah, it might be something she’s allergic to getting in the breast milk,” he explained while rubbing Liana’s back. “Here let me take her so you can have a break. Go to the kitchen, get some water and write down a list of what you’ve been eating recently and we’ll go over it and see if we can find anything that lines up with her fussiness.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“I’ll survive,” he nodded. 

You passed over your baby to him and made your way out of the room, following James’ suggestion and noticing how with a little bit of time her crying had quieted down and instead was replaced by softer sniffles and a much nicer sound. It drew you away from the list you were leaning over and back to the door of the bedroom where you leaned in the frame and watched and listened while James, with his back turned to you, sang a soft lullaby to Liana. 

I love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.

Over and over like a prayer until Liana’s sniffles had faded and there was only silence. 

He carefully put her back in her bed, waiting a few moments to make sure she was really sleeping, before turning back and seeing you standing in the doorway. 

When he made his way up to you, you reached out and pulled him into as tight of a hug as you’d ever given him. You held onto the sleeves of your shirt while one arm came under his and across his back with the other around his neck, holding him as close to you as you possibly could. 

“You okay?” James asked and you nodded your head, silently while a few more tears streamed down your face. 

“I will be.” 

“I-,” James faltered for a moment, but he said it anyway. “I love you.” 

“I love you too.” 

Three words he had said so many times, that had meant a particular thing when he said them to you, but now he couldn’t help but feel like they meant something a little different. 

You both stayed like that a moment longer before you pulled apart, wiping away your tears and going back to your list to see if James’ theory could be correct. 

“Maybe try cutting these ones out of your diet,” he suggested. “See if she gets any better and if not call me and I’ll get her an appointment with one of the pediatricians at the hospital.” 

“Okay,” you nodded. “I just don’t get why they kept saying colic like is that just some doctor term for I don’t know what’s wrong, but your baby is fussy?” 

“I don’t know,” James shook his head, “but don’t ever let anyone bully you into not trusting your gut. She’s your daughter and you know her best.” 

“You seem to know her pretty well too. You took one look at her and managed to help her when I couldn’t,” you pinched the bridge of your nose. 

“Coincidence,” he patted your shoulder. 

“Give yourself a little credit. You’re with her a lot too, it’s part of why I trust your judgement so much when it comes to her. I know you’re not just going to tell me some medical mumbo jumbo you…you’re with her, you see how she is, you know.” 

“I don’t know how you managed to hold it together so well,” James said. “I was in there with her for twenty minutes and I wanted to cry right with her.” 

“It’s so hard,” you shook your head. “You can tell she’s uncomfortable, that something’s wrong, but she can’t tell you what.” 

James nodded his head, “Before you know it she’ll be walking and talking and hopefully it’ll be a lot easier to understand what she needs.” 

“It’s hard to imagine that,” you chuckled. “She is growing so fast though.” 

“And you’re doing a great job,” James wrapped an arm around your shoulder and you took a deep breath. You wanted to correct him and say ‘we’re doing a great job’, but everything about this felt so delicate. It wasn’t his responsibility to parent Liana and you didn’t want to pressure him into thinking that it had become that, but regardless you felt like he’d been around so much it would be wrong to give yourself full credit for everything. 

“It takes a village,” you settled on saying, extending your arm so it was wrapped around him as well. “Speaking of a village, I need to hire a nanny.” 

“So you’re going to go back to work?” he asked and you nodded. 

“Just part time for now. Pay is good enough. I should be fine with that for a while.” 

“Good,” James nodded. “Do you need help going through resumes?” 

“Nah, Janine is taking care of that for me, her boyfriend works with the police so free background checks. She’s gonna send me a short list and then I’ll interview them.” 

You looked up at James and chuckled, 

“You seem surprised.” 

“I didn’t know you outsourced to other people too,” he teased. 

“Are you jealous, Jamie?” you tickled his sides a little bit. “Come on, you know you’re my number one. Can you seriously tell me you could have gotten police-level background checks on nannies?” 

“I could have tried.” 

“I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m gonna save you from this job so you can help me with other stuff, okay?” you turned him around and patted his chest. “I love you, James, but you can’t do it all. I have to look out for you too.” 

“You don’t have to look after me,” he assured you. “You’ve got a lot on your plate, I can take care of myself.” 

“James, that’s the whole point of this,” you pointed between you. “I’m not about to let it be one-sided.” 

“Is that why you keep packing me lunches?” he asked. 

“Maybe,” you shrugged. “And it's kind of fun leaving you little notes.” 

“House thinks I’m seeing someone because of what you put in the last one. He steals my food, you know.” 

“I’ll just pack double next time,” you laughed. 

James smiled at the sound of your laughter, savouring the moment of levity he was able to bring you after a long and hard few days. 

You looked back up at him once your laughter had died down and filled with a quiet sense of gratitude, you could help but lean into his side, sighing contentedly and it made you feel warm to the touch when his arm wrapped around you and pulled you in closer. 

Things may not have been simple or easy, but at least they felt right.

—

James was just about to leave his office to get some food in the cafeteria when he heard the phone ring, keeping him seated at his desk so he could answer. 

“Hello, Oncology Department. Dr. James Wilson speaking.”

“James, it’s me,” you said quickly, almost like you were in a hurry. 

“Is something wrong?” he asked. 

“Nothing dire,” you sighed. “My nanny got sick and my backup nanny is out of town and I have this huge meeting at work I cannot miss, but I-I don’t have anyone to look after Liana. I hate to ask this, you know I wouldn’t bug you unless it was a real emergency, but can I bring her by? Just for two maybe three hours tops. Then I’ll come grab her and she can be in my office with me for the rest of the day.”

“Yeah, of course, bring her over,” James nodded. “I have a few patient consults today, but nothing too strenuous or contagious for a small baby.”

“James, are you sure? I feel really bad asking-,”

“It’s fine. Today was going to be boring anyway, I could use some Liana time to spice things up.”

“James, I love you, you’re a lifesaver,” you breathed a sigh of relief. “I owe you one okay? Cash it in whenever.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he chuckled. “I’m gonna go grab a quick bite to eat. I’ll meet you in my office when you come.”

“Great, see you then.”

You both hung up and when James came back upstairs you were just arriving at his office with Liana strapped in her car seat and a bag slung around your shoulder. 

“Okay, I’ve got snacks, and a carrier, and her toys, and-,”

“Goodness, take a breath,” James chuckled. “We’re gonna be fine, I’ve looked after her before.” 

“I know, I know. I’m just nervous about this meeting and rushing around to get everything prepped and then the nannies fell through,” you took a deep breath to try and slow your heart down and James put a hand on your shoulder assuring you everything was going to be alright. 

“You’re gonna kill it at that meeting, alright?” he pulled you in for a quick hug. 

“Thanks again, I seriously appreciate and love you and your big fat heart.” 

“Thanks, I think,” he chuckled again. “I love you too.”

You kissed your hand and tapped it on his cheek before doing the same for Liana who smiled and James took a moment to stare out the door and watch you as you left the room, still feeling his heart beating a little faster after having said I love you. 

Ever since the day he came over when Liana was having a hard time, his heart would race and his palms would get sweaty every time he’d say those three words, knowing he meant it in a different way than he had been saying it all these years. 

“Liana banana, what am I gonna do,” James sighed and bent down so he was at eye level with her. “Do you think your mom knows?”

Liana babbled a response. 

“Me neither,” he sighed. “It’s okay though, cause we’re gonna have a fun day right?”

He unclipped her from the seat after fastening the baby carrier to his back to begin with before propping her up and clipping her inside. 

Once he was content with that, he checked the time and noticed he was almost late for a meeting with a patient who was staying at the hospital for treatment. 

James made his way down the halls, knowing not many would question him about the baby on his back, that was aside from his boss who now seemed to be walking directly towards him. 

He quickly took a detour into an empty room and thinking he lost her, let out a breath only to be startled when the door opened and Cuddy was standing in front of him. 

“Wilson,” she started. 

“Mhmm.”

“What’s on your back?” she asked, trying to get a better look, but James simply turned around.

“Oh it’s just a backpack,” he lied, only to be immediately ratted out by Liana’s nonsensical sounds. 

“You have a talking backpack?” Cuddy looked at him skeptically. 

“No, it’s a tumour. I’m dying,” he lied again, even more poorly than before.

Cuddy sighed, “Are we gonna get sued for it?” 

James pressed his lips together and shook his head. 

“Will someone get mad at you for it?”

He shook his head again.

“Is House involved?”

A third time. 

“Okay,” she nodded slowly. “I won’t question your…talking backpack tumour.”

James nodded his head and Cuddy left the room which hopefully meant he was in the clear for the rest of the day. 

Liana had other ideas and decided she didn’t like being in the carrier on his back anymore and began to cry. James wondered what was different, he’d done this with her before, but perhaps it was the new environment and she just wanted to be where she could see him.

So after some maneuvering, he changed the positioning of the carrier and put Liana back inside and she seemed much more relaxed afterwards. 

When he got to his patient he apologized for being late, but they were more focused on the child that James had yet to introduce. 

“Sorry, I’m a little all over the place right now,” he chuckled. “This is Liana, she’s going to be joining us today.”

“Is she your daughter?” he asked, seeing the way James smiled and held her when he introduced her. 

“No,” James shook his head. “She’s the daughter of one of my close friends. I’m just doing her a favour today.”

“Either way, it’s always nice to see someone smiling and happy around here.”

“Yeah, I thought so too,” James nodded. 

“How old is she?”

“Six months as of two weeks ago.”

“They grow fast, don’t they?”

James smiled and nodded, “They sure do.”

They continued their consult, and before long James wrapped things up and headed back to his office to meet with another patient. 

This time around he was feeding and burping Liana throughout the meeting and it felt so much like second nature to him, it didn’t take him away at all from the questions the patient was asking, and much like he expected, having a baby in the room was a nice distraction from the heavy subject matter. 

He got through the next few patients with ease, and he felt lucky that House only decided to come in after all his meetings were over. 

“Is that a baby?” House squinted, looking at Liana who was calmly playing with a toy in James’ lap. 

“No, it’s an alien,” he deadpanned and House ignored his comment. 

“Why do you have a baby? That must be breaking some hospital rule.”

“Since when do you care about rules?”

“Cause rules are there to protect us,” House said sarcastically. “Is this the one you spend all your free time with?”

“Her name is Liana,” James said while standing up and moving to put her in her car seat for a moment. “House, I’m gonna ask you to do something and I’m going to trust that you won’t blow this up in my face.”

“Go on.”

“I need to use the washroom, but you’ve seen the way they get cleaned here, I don’t want to bring Li with me,” he said. “Can you watch her for five minutes? You don’t even have to do anything, just stare at her in the carrier.”

House thought about it for a moment before eventually agreeing, James completely oblivious to his friend’s ulterior motive.

House first sat across from her, turning her car seat around on the table so it was facing him. They stared at each other for a few moments before House stood up and grabbed a picture from one of James’ shelves, sitting back down in front of her. 

“You’re probably too young to do this, but never too young to learn, right?”

Liana had no response. 

“You see this guy?” House pointed to James in the photo. “He’s dada, right?”

House continued to prompt her, even though he knew she was too young to speak, thinking this would make a great prank if he played his cards right. 

House continued to go back and forth with Liana between her babbles, until he heard James begin to open the door of the office. 

“Everything okay?” he asked. 

“Perfect,” House nodded. “Your daughter’s an angel.” 

James frowned, unable to tell if House was being sarcastic or not, but he was quickly distracted by the frame in his hand.

“Why do you have that picture?” James came closer and took it from him.

“Oh, just trying to pass the time with a story.” 

“The story of what exactly? This is just a picture of me with my parents.” 

“I don’t know I made something up, she’s a baby, she won’t remember,” House insisted before leaving the office before James could ask any more questions. 

A little confused by the encounter, he made his way over to Liana who was reaching out for him. 

He checked the time, seeing as your meeting should probably have been over by then and decided to give you a call. 

“Hey, I was just about to come and pick Liana up,” you said. 

“Yeah, about that, do you just want to leave her with me for the rest of the day?” he asked. “She’s been really good and honestly I think the patients have been loving seeing a baby around.” 

“James, it’s fine, my meeting is over. I can come get her,” you said. 

James pressed his lips together before gathering the nerve to say what he was going to say. 

“I actually would really like it if she could stay with me,” he said. “If you’re okay with it.”

You paused, “This isn’t just some round about way for you to find a way to give me a break?” you asked. 

“No, I’m really happy she’s here. I was going to come over after work anyways.” 

“You still have the car seat hookup in your car?” you asked and he confirmed. “Okay, call me if you need anything, Jamie.” 

“I will, and thank you.” 

“Just don’t break her, okay, she’s not replaceable,” you teased. 

“I’ll bring her back in one piece,” James chuckled. “We’ll be fine, right Li?” 

James gave her a little tickle so that you could hear her laugh in response and you couldn't help but smile before saying goodbye and feeling more at ease leaving her with James than you ever had leaving her with a babysitter. 

—

It always felt interesting coming back to Princeton-Plainsboro after you had given birth to Liana. It brought back a lot of memories, both good and maybe not so great of your pregnancy, but recently you and Liana had been visiting a little more often to have lunch with James when you weren’t working. 

Today wasn’t one of those days, you were actually just on your way back home after running a few errands and since you were in the area you thought you might stop in and talk to James about that evening. 

When you went by his office you peeked inside and noticed he wasn’t there and before you could decide the best course of action, you heard a semi familiar voice behind you. 

“You looking for Wilson?” 

You turned around and saw House standing in front of you. 

“Yeah, actually. Do you know where he is?” 

“I think he just went to Cuddy’s office,” he said. 

“Alright, I’ll head back downstairs then,” you smiled and were about to haul Liana’s car seat with you, but House stopped you. 

“If you want I can look after her in my office,” he said.

“Really?” you seemed a little surprised from the offer, but figured it couldn’t be too bad to leave her with him for five minutes. 

“Sure,” House nodded, making it seem like it was no big deal, when really he had already pocketed a picture of James and was looking for another opportunity to continue his prank. 

“Alright, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” you said while walking over to his office and putting her car seat on the main table before walking down the hallways and over to the elevator to go and find James, but just to your luck, he was coming out just as you had planned to enter. “Hey, I was looking for you,” you smiled. 

“Oh, I didn’t realize you were coming, did we make plans?” he asked, worried he’d forgotten about something. 

“No, I was just in the area and, well my mom and dad are coming over for dinner tonight, I was wondering if you wanted to join us.” 

“Dinner sounds nice,” James nodded. “And I haven’t seen your parents in a while, I just seem to miss them every time they come into town.” 

“Yeah, that’s why I thought I’d ask, also maybe as a warning in case you wanted to get as far away as you could,” you chuckled. 

“Come on, they’re not that bad,” he nudged you. 

“Most of the time, but then again, you’re not their child.” 

“Wait, where’s Liana?” James asked. “With a sitter at home?” 

“No, I left her with House.” 

James’ eyes went wide, “You left her with House?”

“Yeah, what’s the big deal?” you chuckled as James began to walk towards House’s office to make sure he wasn’t up to one of his many schemes. “James he offered!” you called back and that only made him walk faster. 

It took you a minute to catch up with him, but by that time he was already interrogating House who was simply sitting in front of Liana. 

“Can't I offer to look after my friend’s friend’s baby?” House asked. 

“Usually someone could, but when that person is you you may see why I think you have some ulterior motive.” 

“James what’s going on?” you asked, coming closer to House. “Liana’s fine, I don’t know why you’re being so dramatic.” 

“Yeah, listen to single mom over here,” he pointed to you. 

James backed off if only for your sake, but he still kept a close eye on House as you picked up Liana’s car seat and told James you’d see him after his shift was over. 

He nodded his head and you exchanged a kiss on the cheek before heading out. 

“You’re really telling me you’re not getting some of that on the side?” House asked. 

“House, drop it,” James was unamused. “I know you’re up to something, I just don’t know what.” 

“I guess you’re just going to have to wait and find out,” House shrugged. “In the meantime may I suggest you go get your freak on with the mom? You know she probably hasn’t slept with anyone since that kid was conceived, I’m sure you’d have an easy time convincing her.” 

“Shut up, House,” James rolled his eyes and left the office before he could suggest anything more obscene. 

He was thankful when the end of his shift came, and before heading to your place he made a stop at the store to buy some flowers and dessert to bring over. 

By this point, it was such a habit, he never knocked, just opened the door with his key and announced his presence to whoever was in the house. 

“Hey Liana, look who’s here,” you smiled and pointed to James while Liana was being held by your mother. 

Liana became very excited at the sight of him and he quickly put down the things he brought on the table before saying his greetings and giving special attention to Liana by means of a kiss on her nose and caress of her face. 

“Do you want something to drink?” you asked. “Mom and dad brought some fancy-looking sparkling fruit juice.” 

“I could go for some of that,” James nodded. “How have you guys been, I missed you the last time you were in town.” 

“We’ve been good,” your dad nodded. 

“Unfortunately our granddaughter doesn’t come to visit us very much,” your mom gave you a bit of a look and you rolled your eyes. 

“Mom, you guys are retired, I have a job, why don’t we keep this ‘you visit me’ arrangement a while longer until my life sorts itself out a bit more.” 

“She’s not wrong, honey,” your dad came and patted his wife’s shoulder. 

“I know, I just wish we got to see Liana more. We should come down more often.” 

“What about you, James, anything new in your life?” 

James looked over at you before shaking his head. 

“No, still working at the same place still…” 

“Trying to find the right person,” you filled in for him, placing a hand on his shoulder and handing him his drink. 

“Yeah,” he nodded with a soft smile and couldn’t help but laugh a little internally at the irony. Maybe the right person had been there all along, the person he’d never once pulled away from, the person he let take care of him, the person who he’d realized he’d most definitely fallen in love with, but risking things between you was out of the question so he would have to be content with the way things were. 

“You’re the head of your department, right?” your mom asked and James nodded. “Wow, that’s quite something, your parents must be proud of you.” 

“Yes, it never fails to come up in conversation with my mother,” he chuckled. 

Liana began to fuss a little bit in her grandmother’s arms and after a few failed attempts at calming her down James offered to take over. 

“Are you sure, honey?” she asked. “She gets a bit cranky and it’s hard to calm her down.” 

“Don’t worry mom, James is an expert,” you assured her. 

James nodded and confirmed he was sure before gently bouncing Liana until she stopped crying and wiping away whatever tears of hers were remaining. 

“She seems very attached to you,” your dad remarked and James looked down at Liana who now had her head resting against his chest. 

“The feeling’s quite mutual,” James chuckled. “Does she need to be fed?” he asked you. 

“Yeah we’re probably getting close to that time now, I’ll warm up the bottle. Maybe I can feed her and you can deal with the sauce on the stove, it’s missing something and I can’t place it.” 

“Sure,” James nodded and waited for you to heat up Liana’s bottle before passing her over and taking a turn at the stove. 

Your parents watched your interactions curiously and shared a few looks between themselves, but chose to say nothing. They’d known James since you were both nineteen and a lot of things had happened since then, but a lot of time had passed too. It was interesting how your comfort with each other in friendship had so naturally extended itself in this way that you were practically functioning as a family whether you noticed it, or maybe deliberately chose to ignore it. 

After you fed Liana and burped her, she was quick to fall asleep and you placed her in her cot in your room before joining James and your parents in the kitchen where they were bringing things to the dining room to lay them out on the table.

“This looks really delicious sweetheart, thank you for making dinner,” your dad said. “And you too James for taking over there in the home stretch.” 

“For all we know it could have tasted terrible before he came in so he can take the credit for that,” you chuckled. 

“No, I gave it a taste before adding anything. It just needed a little something sour to balance some things out, otherwise it was perfect,” he assured you. 

Dinner with your parents was mostly small talk. They shared a little about some of your relatives they had recently spoken to or visited and asked James how his family was doing and they left fairly early to start the drive back home. 

“I’ll load the dishes you put away the leftovers?” James yawned and you chuckled. 

“How about I do both since I had a day off and you go and lay down for a bit,” you suggested. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about I’m fine,” James waved his hand but yawned again. 

“Go to sleep, James. That’s not a suggestion,” you walked up to him. “My ex left some sweatpants here you can change into those and take off this button up,” you tugged at his shirt. 

James pressed his lips together and nodded his head, before heading over to the bedroom and quietly getting changed before climbing into bed and not fighting the sleep that came. 

He initially wasn’t sure how much later it was when he woke up, but by the looks of it much too late to go come considering you were next to him, despite being groggy, he had a million and one things crossing his mind, but all of those were thrown out when he heard Liana begin to cry. 

You shifted next to him, waking up to go and take care of it, but James put an arm on your shoulder. 

“I’ve got it, go back to sleep,” he assured you. 

You were too tired to argue with him and let your head hit the pillow again while he stood up and picked Liana up from her crib, heading out to the kitchen so he could heat up a bottle for her before coming back and sitting in the chair to feed her. 

You watched the scene in front of you and you felt yourself wanting to memorize every detail. How he held her, the quiet things he whispered, the way she curled into his arms while he stood up and rocked her back to sleep. 

When he came back to the bed he noticed you were awake and he let out a soft chuckle and you smiled looking up at him with his messy hair. Suddenly you were nineteen again and banging on the door of cabin 3 trying to wake your fellow counsellor to come and deal with an emergency. To you he looked the same as he did all those years ago. 

“I told you to go back to sleep.” 

“Not everyone can fall asleep instantly,” you yawned with a chuckle. 

“You didn’t wake me up to leave,” he said quietly, his head resting on his hand that propped him up. 

“You always look so peaceful when you sleep, I feel evil whenever I have to wake you up,” you remarked, but behind your eyes if he could see through the darkness of the room, he would have seen them saying something else. That you wanted him to stay, you didn’t want to wake him up because you wanted to wake up next to him. “You don’t mind do you?” 

“That you’re making me do the walk of shame in the morning?” James teased and shook his head. 

“Just shut up and go back to sleep, Jamie,” you yawned with a chuckle. 

He moved so he was laying down on his back with an arm behind his head and you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him. Maybe he could feel you staring because he reached his other arm out and pulled you closer and you moved with him until your head rested against his chest, your arm draped over top of him. 

He gave you a gentle squeeze with the arm that was wrapped around you and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. 

“Goodnight, Jamie,” you mumbled into his shirt. 

You couldn’t see how he looked down and smiled at you after you said that, all that filled your ears was a quiet, “Goodnight.”

—

“I haven’t seen you in a few days, how have you been?” 

James sat on the carpet of the living room, playing with Liana who was crawling around him while you brought over two mugs of tea so you could chat while you entertained the growing baby. 

“Good for the most part, just had a patient who wasn’t doing so great so I spent some extra time at the hospital to keep an eye on things. Not to mention House has been bugging me to go out and it’s been a while so I figured what’s the harm.”

“He got you plastered and you made a fool of yourself, didn’t he?” you asked and James nodded while you laughed. “Liana, did James go out with House and act like an idiot?” you tickled the ten month old and she giggled before coming closer to you, tapping on your legs with her hands. 

“Don’t listen to your mama, Li, she’s trying to-,”

“Mama,” Liana repeated after James had spoken and you both stopped dead in your tracks. 

You looked over at James and his smile was just as wide as yours before you picked Liana up and smothered her with kisses. 

“Liana, look at you! You said your first word!”

“Good job, Liana banana,” James grinned and gave her cheek a little pinch which made her reach out to him and say, 

“Dada.”

You both had a similar reaction to what happened moments ago, only this time it was pure shock. Maybe you had misheard her, but when she repeated herself, James could feel his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. 

“I-I don’t know where she learnt that from,” he told you. “I swear I didn’t teach her that.”

It took a minute for the shock to fade away for you, but once it did you tried to assure James that it was okay. 

“I believe you,” you said. “I-I don’t know where she picked it up from, but it’s okay.”

James chewed on his lip, it wasn’t okay though because he wanted nothing more than to hear Liana say that again. 

“It’s not though,” James said softly. “I love her, but I’m not her dad. That’s not fair to her or to you.”

“Jamie,” you pleaded with him, but he still seemed stuck on something. 

“I’m really sorry,” he apologized again. “I feel like I ruined a special moment.”

“I’m trying to tell you it really doesn’t matter,” you assured him, you could see it in his eyes, he wanted to leave, to let you have time alone, but you didn’t want to be alone, you wanted him to stay with you. “Please…please stay.”

James reached out his hand to hold yours and was about to give you his answer when his pager went off. 

Your heart clenched and you watched as he read the message and sighed, standing up because he was needed again at the hospital. 

“Your patient?” you asked, picking Liana up and standing next to him. 

He nodded his head, “They were scheduled for an unrelated surgery and there were some complications, I have to go.”

You understood and James wrapped you in a tight hug and you kissed his cheek. 

“I love you, Jamie.”

“I love you too,” he whispered, wishing he could hold onto you and never let you go, but instead he was pulled away from your warm embrace wondering how on earth Liana had learnt to call him dad. 

—

“You look like you haven’t slept in days, spending time with the baby again?” House asked, waltzing into James’ office. 

“No, I haven't been over in a few days,” James shook his head. 

“You haven’t been over in a few days…Something happened,” House deduced and James gave him a look. 

“Nothing happened. I’m just taking a break,” he lied. 

“You’ve been going non-stop to spend time with them since the baby was born ten months ago, why do you need a break now?” 

“Because I have a lot on my mind and there’s a few new patients I need to focus on-,” 

“You’re lying.” 

“Yes I am,” James admitted and House grinned. 

“Really?” 

“No, I’m not,” he shook his head and continued to look down and do his work. 

“We do this every single time and every single time I’m right,” House said. “Why don’t we save the back and forth for another time and just skip to the part where you tell me what’s going on.” 

“Oh really and you were right that time you thought I was cheating on my wife and she was the one cheating on me?” he asked. 

“Okay, so I’m not perfect,” House shrugged. “What happened, Wilson? I could just as easily get your friend’s number and ask directly if that’s what you’d prefer.” 

“God no,” James shook his head. “Leave her alone, she doesn’t need to deal with you on top of working and raising a child.” 

“Alright then, what happened?” 

James took a deep breath and sighed, “Liana called me dad the other day. I have no idea where she learnt it from.” 

“She started speaking,” House nodded, pressing his lips together. “Was it her first word or-,” 

“Second. She said mom first,” James said, but caught a glimpse of his friend trying to fight back a smile and suddenly all the offers to take care of Liana paired with the photographs made sense. “You taught her!” he exclaimed. “House I can’t believe you’d pull a prank on me by manipulating my friend’s baby!” 

“Oh come on, it’s not that big of a deal,” House rolled his eyes. 

“House, I cannot believe you!” 

“You’re not mad at me,” House shook his head. “You’re just mad you liked it.” 

“No I’m-,” 

“Yes, you are,” the diagnostician emphasized. “You’ve been sitting here tearing yourself apart for the past four days because she called you dad and you liked it. You’re mad at yourself for liking it because she’s not your kid.” 

“No,” James quieted down. “She’s not.” 

“You haven’t gone back because you’re afraid to hear her say it again, aren’t you?” 

“Since when did you become an expert on my personal problems, House? You caused this, why should I listen to anything you have to say?” 

“Because you’re being an idiot. You’re punishing yourself for liking something. Do you realize how insane that sounds?” 

“It’s not insane, House, she’s not my baby-,” 

“Sure, she’s not your baby and you have her feeding and nap routine memorized. You’ve been to her doctor's appointments, she’s calmer in your arms than she is in the arms of her grandparents. Yeah, go and tell that to any moron sitting out there and they’ll tell you for me, you’re being an idiot.” 

James sighed again, “And why do you care?” 

“Because once you’re done with this spiral we can go back to the way things were when you weren’t a boring depressed lump.” 

“How kind of you,” James faked a smile. 

House’s pager went off, leaving James alone again in his office, thinking about what his friend had said. 

You’d told him so many times that things were okay, but maybe a part of him didn’t want to let him believe that you didn’t mind because that was a slippery slope to him facing himself and his feelings and he didn’t care what his heart was telling him, he wouldn’t put himself through that. He wouldn’t put you and Liana through that. But at the same time, he couldn’t keep himself away forever. He didn’t want that either.

So with a deep breath he picked up his office phone and dialled your number, putting it up to his ear and waiting for the line to connect on the other end. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey, it’s me.” 

“James,” your voice sounded almost relieved. “H-Hey, how are you?” 

He pressed his lips together, “Miserable, actually. I miss you guys.” 

“We miss you too,” you chuckled with a small sniffle. 

“C-Can I come over for dinner tonight?” he asked. 

“You still have a key, what do you think?” you asked with a bit of a laugh. “I’ll see you tonight.” 

“Yeah, see you then,” James smiled and after he hung up the phone he took a deep breath, his fast heartbeat slowing down by the second. 

Maybe this time House was right.

—

The next few weeks passed by and things resumed to their normal state, much to House’s delight. James’ role as department head always meant at least one day a week where he would stay late and do some extra paperwork, dealing with anything that may have slipped through the cracks before. 

This time, that had fallen on a Sunday and it was just past dinner when he heard a knock on his door and wondering who was on the other end he called for them to come in. 

You opened the door a crack and again asked permission to come in and James smiled at you, looking up from his paperwork, not expecting to see you in the hospital. 

“Hey, I wasn’t expecting to see you here, what’s going on?” 

“I just wanted to drop by and bring you something for dinner, I know it’s your paperwork day.” 

“Thanks, that’s really sweet of you,” he stood up from his chair and came to stand in front of his desk, leaning back on it while you placed the take out bag on the table. “Where’s Liana?” 

“Oh Helen’s looking after her tonight,” you said. “I had a few things I needed to do and um just wanted the evening off,” you admitted. 

“Fair enough,” James nodded. 

“I actually brought you something else,” you rolled back and forth on the balls of your feet and James noticed the tension in your stature. “H-Here,” you handed him a gift bag which he eyed curiously. 

Today wasn’t his birthday or some memorable event you celebrated together. There wasn’t much of a reason to get him a present which made it all the more intriguing. 

He pulled out a wrapped rectangular box from the bag, and putting the bag aside he began to carefully tear away the wrapping paper to reveal what looked like a picture frame. Overlaid on the frame, on top of the photo, James noticed a card which he unfolded to read its contents. 

Happy Father’s Day. We love you loads. - Liana and Mom

James moved the card to see the picture and put his hand over his mouth, feeling tears involuntarily form in his eyes as he saw the familiar scene of your room, lit by the light of your lamp as Liana was fast asleep against his chest while he napped on the armchair. 

James quickly wiped away the few tears that were in his eyes and looked up at you with a grateful smile, looking back down at the image before placing it neatly on his desk along with the card. 

“I hope you like it,” you said quietly, biting your lip. “I thought you might want to have a copy of that picture and…you know just a thank you for everything you’ve done for me and Liana this past year.” 

“I love it,” he assured you. “I-I love it and I love you.” 

“I love you too,” you smiled.

“N-No,” James came closer and reached out, taking your hands in his. “I…I love you. I’m in love with you.” 

“Jamie,” you spoke in a breathy whisper, unsure of how you lost your voice. “I-,” you opened your mouth to speak again, but paused when James raised a hand to your face, wiping away the tears you didn’t even notice had begun to stream down. 

“I just don’t want to be away from you, ever,” he said softly. “I never did. And now with Liana, I want to be there, for all of it.” 

You held the wrist of his hand that held your face, pulling him in closer so your foreheads rested against each other. 

You took in a shaky breath, thinking back on those words. Something you’d been saying to each other for longer than you could remember. The first time was so clear in your mind, you were on the phone racking up long distance charges while James was in Montreal. It had slipped out by accident, a reflex, and you had convinced yourself when the phone had hung up you’d never call him back, unable to face what you’d just said, but before you could spiral any further, he said it back and you never stopped saying it.

For the longest time that was the only occurrence that was memorable, everything else was a blur, that was until a few months ago. It was so simple, you had fallen asleep on the couch and James had made sure Liana was fed and bathed and even cleared up some things in the kitchen before sitting on the couch with some tea and a book. You had talked and said I love you as a thank you, but when the words left your mouth they also left a lingering airiness in your heart, a feather light feeling that came crashing down like an anvil when he left to go home because you realized you never wanted to be apart from him.

It took you a few moments to realize you hadn’t said anything and James was anxiously waiting for some sort of communication, anything, but since the meaning of your words had changed, for both of you, you thought it might be more conducive to work in actions.

You closed in the space between you, at first gently resting your lips on his and letting him lead you in a soft and slow kiss, putting aside all the restraint you both had been using these past months in an effort to protect your friendship.

One of James’ hands held onto your waist, pulling you in so that there was no space left between you. He kissed you again and again, remembering each one as a core memory, engraved in his mind, paired with the feeling of your arms wrapped around his neck, the feeling of your body pressed so closely against his, his heart beating outside of his chest. 

It was easy for his lips to trail away from yours, moving along your jaw, to your temple before you had pulled each other into a warm embrace, simply existing in each other’s arms. James thought to himself what a nice life it would be, not ever having to pull away. 

—

“I don’t have much to say,” James smiled. “Everything is looking good, you still seem 100% healthy to me.” 

“That’s great news.” 

“It definitely is. Standard procedure, but we’ll have one more of these remission follow ups to make sure everything is still in order then you hopefully won’t have to see me again.” 

“Thank you Dr. Wilson, I really appreciate all you’ve-.” 

“Dad!” 

“Sweetheart, wait he’s with a patient!” 

James turned his head and saw Liana running over to him, you valiantly trying to chase after her without much success. 

He quickly scooped her up in his arms before she crashed into him, pressing a big kiss to her cheek. 

“Sorry about that,” James apologized. “It’s Saturday, we normally have lunch together.” 

“No worries,” he chuckled. 

“Liana, this is my patient Mr. Kimbilio, can you say hi?” 

Liana waved and said hi, very exuberantly. 

“This is my daughter,” James introduced. “And that’s my wife,” he pointed over to you. 

“Daughter,” Mr. Kimbilio smiled. “I think I met you Liana, when you were very small. Your father was looking after you at work and so some of his patients got to meet you.” 

“Really?” she looked up at her dad and he nodded. 

“He’s right, I remember that,” James smiled. “You’ve grown a lot since then, haven’t you Li,” he kissed her cheek again and she giggled.

You finally caught up to the group and James greeted you with a quick kiss, passing Liana off to you so he could wrap things up and you could all go down to the cafeteria for lunch together. 

“If I remember correctly,” Mr. Kimbilio started. “You didn’t introduce her as your daughter the first time we met. I’m glad something changed.” 

“Me too,” James smiled, looking over at his wife and daughter fondly who were now in the midst of making him very proud by pulling off a small prank on House as he came out of his office. 

It didn’t take much longer for them to wrap things up and you and Liana made a quick pit stop inside James’ office before heading downstairs.

Liana went to go sit in James’ seat while he put away his files and organized them. 

It had been a while since you’d been in his office, but it felt like ever since the night you first kissed things had begun to change in the room. 

His desk was now more littered with photos than knickknacks and Liana’s artwork was posted wherever there was room. 

You came around to the other side, looking a little more closely at the pictures. 

There was one of you, James, and Liana on your wedding day, another of just the two of you during an anniversary celebration, Liana’s kindergarten photo from school and another one of you as a family on your last vacation. And still as prominent as ever, the framed photo you had gifted James on his first father’s day. 

“You ready to go?” he asked you, looking up and noticing your eyes gazing at the pictures on his desk. 

When you didn’t initially respond, too focused on what you were looking at, James wrapped an arm around you and tilted your chin towards him so he could press a kiss to your lips.

“I love you,” you smiled and James kissed you again, saying.

“And I love you,” before moving over to pick up Liana and kiss her cheek. “And you.”

Liana giggled, feeling tickled by the kisses and moving to give both of you a kiss on the cheek before saying. 

“Mom, Dad, I’m starving. Can we go eat now?”

“Sure, Liana banana,” James chuckled and you wrapped an arm around him, walking side by side out of the office and in the direction of the elevator to get to the cafeteria, thinking you were pretty lucky that in the end, your best friend listened to his heart and went after what he wanted.

TAGLIST —

@cuntyvicodin @paola-carter @kiddbegins @il0vebeingdelulu @illicit4ff4irs @lynnsthoughts @miarabanana @iwmflbb @shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey @sarcasm-and-stiles @sun-flower-mad @x-uno @han11dh @qardasngan @alexxavicry

[teriri-sayes]

Reactions to The Incomprehensible's Chapter 337

New title - 43. What is your goal, your end?

Brief summary: Cale is scared of the portal. Cale's group enters the Demon Realm. Cale meets the boss of the Arbitrators and the unconscious CJG.

==========

Today was another funny chapter with some info in the end. The portal to the demon realm was described as a sloshing and churning black swamp that Cale found so repulsive. So when he thought that he had to jump down there, he felt scared.

Cale: *feels scared and disgusted when he saw the portal* CH: Cale-nim... Cale: (Yeah, we have to go... I'm not scared. Definitely not because of CH's gentle smile) Glutton: You're scared. Cale: Cotton, you go first. (I'm not saying this because I don't trust her. Absolutely not because I don't want to be the first to jump down that disgusting swamp.) Cotton: Okay! CH and CJS: *notices Cale's discomfort* Cale: *pretends to not notice the 2 Chois staring at him*

Cale's denial is just so... 🤣🤣🤣 In the end, Cale had no choice but to jump and find out that the inside of the portal wasn't so bad. The black lake inside was full of sparkling lights, so it looked like a beautiful night sky.

BTW, Cale's group to the Demon Realm was Cale, CH, CJS, Raon, Hong, Rasheel, and Mary. On and the Molans protected Eden, Eruhaben took care of the Aipotu aftermath work, and Sui continued his investigation of the GoC in Aipotu.

The air and mana in the demon realm were different from other worlds, so they had to wear a necklace that served as a filter. It also had an automatic language translation function.

The boss of the Arbitrators was called Aurora, a middle-aged woman with golden eyes. There was a funny scene where Cale got princess carried by a huge demon when he fell down from the portal, and how the kids called Cale as weak as wet paper. 😂

But what was funnier was how the Arbitrators treated Cale. Their HQ was shabby and looked like an abandoned village. The outfits of their members looked worn out. So when Aurora met Cale whom she heard to be wealthy, the first thing she asked was if he was willing to invest in their group... 🤣🤣🤣

Cale and Raon felt scared that they would be robbed. SR and Fire AP also cautioned Cale about them... 😂😂😂 Because they saw Cale as a golden calf, a gold nugget. 😂

CJG's condition was bad. He was gray all over. His veins were bulging, some slimy thing was on his skin, and festering boils were all over his body. He ended up like that because some of the Five-Colored Bloods he encountered in the GoC temple were also GoC followers. And we got the info that the leader of the Five-Colored Bloods was called the King of Wanderers, and the first ever wanderer.

Ending Remarks Scared Cale was so funny today. 😂 Next chapter would probably be an info dump about the Five-Colored Bloods.

[phasecornnuts]

HII OMG,, Thinking about Vox/reader with postcoital dysphoria??? If ur comfortable with that ofc ofc!! Take ur time and ty!

Ok y’all I actually kind of cooked with this 😼😼

Also since you said postcoital I assumed you wanted it after sexy time so here you go <33

CW: General angst

——————————————————————————

When he was done Vox rolled over onto his back, leaving you in a sticky puddle of your own release. Your breath felt heavy and body sore, a pulsing pain between your legs from where he had you. Strange thoughts filled your head, shameful, invading, ones. Being with him had felt good in the moment – so fucking good – but now you felt…wrong.

You sat up, wrapping the thin cotton sheet around you, thoughts were growing dark and murky as swamp water. You felt dirty and used and spoiled and….wrong. Vox was still lying on his back, his hands clasped over his chest. His eyes were closed, exhausted after having spent himself inside you.

Slowly you rose, holding your sheet close to you. A shiver took hold of you, coating your body in gooseprickles and making your teeth chatter in an odd tempo. You needed to be away from him, though you didn’t understand why. Nausea and anxiety ran their way through you in cold ripples - leaving you with a sickness akin to not having eaten in days. The air was thick with the scent of sex - a cloying muddy smell strangely primal.

Entering the bathroom from such a place was jarring. You rubbed the sole of your foot on the ugly shag carpeting of Vox’s bedroom, savoring the warmth of it before stepping onto the chill of the tile. Behind you, you locked the door. Back against it, you breathed in, deep and shaky. Inside the bathroom everything seemed to stand still, the nervous anticipation before a tremor. The air was sharp and cold, causing you to cling to your sheet further, though it didn’t help much.

You lied on the ground then, curled with your knees to your chest like a quailing infant. So desperately did you want this feeling to end, but it seemed to feed on that hope. The act you two had done played over and over again in your head, every time making you feel more ashamed. You thought of your face contorting and body bending; The way he huffed and groaned when he was close, like a bear. You squeezed yourself smaller, how could you have done that? You didn’t know which was worse, the fact that he had done all of that to you, to your mouth, your face, your legs, your stomach, or the fact that you had wanted him to before. Out of the corner of your eye you saw yourself in the shiny silver mirror above the sink, a tiny ghost with red glass eyes.

The delicate surface tension in your eyes began to falter. Fat globs of salty tears pleading to be released. You tried to hold them back as well as you could, not allowing yourself the humiliation of it (even if you were the only one that knew.) But it hurt so terribly to keep all of this despair inside, the hinges of your jaw uncomfortably rigid and your throat tighter than any fist you could make. In your head you mocked yourself, trying to see if that could get your mind to stop racing. Crying? You’re crying because you let him put his cock in you? If everyone cried when they got fucked the lust ring would be flooded by now. That only served to make you want to cry more.

In the end, you let yourself cave. Hands shaking you sat yourself up, stroking your cheek. It’s okay sweet girl, calm down, I’ll let you cry. You gave out another heavy breath and looked at the thin fabric in your hand. You bunched the cotton over your mouth and screamed.

You let them out, those raw, throaty wails, like someone getting killed. Keeling over, you pressed your hot forehead to the cool tiles, feeling the way your tears and snot streamed down your face to make a pathetic puddle beneath you. Everything hurt, inside and outside. You were scared and disgusted and tired and guilty. Bile rose in the back of your throat, and quickly you crawled to the toilet, retching a stream of salty hot water. You stared down in the toilet bowl, looking at the froth of stomach acid and saliva marbling together. Weakness and spit. That’s all it was, weakness and spit. A headache was starting to swell inside your skull, extending from your temples to your eyes, aching to burst out.

“What are you doing?!” Nonononono please God, not him you can’t let him see you.

Your body felt light and formless, like you were made of cotton. Turning your head you saw him, briefs hastily put on, his face full of concern and fear. He dashed towards the toilet, kneeling down and pulling you close to his chest, rocking you back and forth. You felt hot and empty and ashamed. You sobbed for a while, shivering and scared. He stroked your hair, brushing flyaway strands behind your ears and wrapped your sheet around you more securely.He looked down at your tear-stained face, face flush and eyes glassy. A string of spit dribbled from the corner of your mouth and he wiped it away with his thumb.

“What happened?” His voice breathless.

“I dunno.” You mumbled, throat sore from your crying.

The two of you sat in silence for a while, him holding your body close while you calmed yourself.

“‘M tired,” You croaked.

He breathed out, looking down at your face again.

“Did I do something?”

“No…”

“Then what happened?” He was confused again.

You shrugged, trying to find words that could define how you felt. “Every time we…you know…” trailing off, afraid saying the act will turn your tongue yellow.

“Have sex?” You flinched at the bluntness and nodded.

“I don’t know, it’s just…” you wrap your arms around his chest, burrowing your face, “Afterwards I feel like I’m a bad person. Like…like I did something wrong.” You felt stupid explaining it like that. In dumb, easy words like a child would.

He held your face in his hands, “Did you not want to? Did…did I make you cry?” You shook your head no.

“I dunno… I just…I just feel that way after we do.”

“Like what?”

You pull away from him and press your back to the cool porcelain of the bathtub, pressing your knees to your chest. “Dirty and gross I guess…” Afraid he would take it the wrong way you look up at him from your eyes. “I mean, I like it when we do it. It feels good…you make me feel good but after I just feel…”

“Bad?” He answers. A simple one syllable word that seems to be both the stupidest and truthful description. You nod.

You both look at each other for a few beats before he helps you up from off the floor, seating you on the toilet. He turns the water for the tub on, so hot it makes his screen fog. Getting the idea, you ease your way in, the scalding bath making your skin itch and tingle.

After around 15 minutes of the tub filling he turns the faucet off with a whulp. You sit in the bath, feeling the heat on your skin and the steam of the water making your face sweat. In your ears you can hear the steady rhythm of your heart, one two one two. You look down at your body, staring at the red parts where Vox had nipped and kissed you.

“I don’t want to make you cry honey,” He says, his voice thick with remorse. You lean over the edge of the bath, holding his wrist before lacing your fingers together.

“You don’t. I promise.”

He kisses your forehead, humming. “We can do this after we…you know.” Vox runs his thumb over your knuckle, “We can talk too, and sleep together. I know I knock out all the time afterwards but you can wake me up and I can hold you if you want.” He offers with an awkward smile.

You give a small grin in agreement, nodding your head. “That sounds nice.”

Vox straightened himself up then, placing a clean towel on the toilet for when you were ready to get out. When you were, wrinkly as a prune, you wrapped it around you snugly. Your body was calm now, tranquil as still water. Feeling the texture of the Terry cloth of the towel you realized it was the first time in you didn’t know how long, that you weren’t still crying after sex. Easily you stood up, ready to face Vox again, happy to know that he was there to care for you.

[thatlovinfeelin]

He Don't Like The Lights | Bradley Bradshaw Actor AU|

Waiting tables wasn’t horrible, but it wasn’t your favorite job either. Not that you hated it, because you didn’t. For the most part you liked your coworkers, your roommate Celeste being one of them. Your bosses weren’t horrible, and the pay was alright. You were able to pay your bills and stash some extra cash away for savings. Soon, or at least you hoped it would be soon, you would be able to move out of the somewhat shitty place with Celeste and get a better apartment. Maybe even leave Virginia altogether. 

“Hey, I need you to take table five.” 

“But it’s not in my section tonight,” You argue with your manager. 

“Just take it, okay? It's a single and you’re better with singles than Celeste,” He replied, shooing you away with his hands. 

You let out a dramatic sigh, rolling your eyes as you grabbed your waitress book and headed towards the single guy sitting at the table. You never sized up tables before you started serving them, never tried to write people off before they had a chance to show their colors. 

But you could tell that this guy was hot just by the way he was sitting with a baseball cap tugged low. He at least knew how to wear a damned hat unlike some of the guys who came in with it halfway on their heads. 

“Hi, welcome in, can I get you started with anything to drink?” You asked cheerfully as you stopped in front of him. 

The bar was relatively empty, which came as a surprise since it was a weekend and the weather was fairly nice. Maybe everyone was still out at the beach and would be in before dinner ended. Maybe you would get lucky and end up having a good tip night to make up for the shitfest that was last night. 

“Uh, just a Bud on draft if you have it.”

“Bud lite?” You question. 

“No, Buswieser, the real shit,” There’s a hint of a laugh in his voice. 

“I’ve got it in a bottle, is that okay?”

“Yeah that works,” He replies, tipping his head back to look up at you. 

It takes you a second to register who’s actually looking at you. You’ve seen those dark hazel eyes on screen plenty of times, because Cele is obsessed with his movies. However, what really takes you back is how normal he looks in an old beat up t-shirt and shorts. He doesn’t look like the glamourous actor that you’ve seen.

“I’m sorry- are you,” You stop and lick your lips. 

You aren’t nervous, because you aren’t obsessed with him. His movies are okay, and you have to admit he is more attractive in person than he is on screen. But you’ve never been one to fall face first over someone who’s in the industry, not that you’ve ever had the chance to before. 

“Are you Bradley Bradshaw?” The question comes out as a whisper as you lean down, trying to be as quiet as you can. 

He pales for a moment, waiting to see if you’re going to fully freak out on him before smiling sheepishly, “Caught that easily, huh?”

“You’re lucky it’s just me and not the other girl over there,” You inform him, “She’d be on the floor, and I know that because I live with her and share a TV with her. But since it’s just me,” you smile at him before backing away a step, “A bottle of Bud coming right up.”

He smiles and relaxes into his seat before looking back down at his phone on the table. You can’t help but smile as you make your way towards the bar and the POS system to start his ticket. 

Bradley Bradshaw is eating in the bar and no one but you knows. He just happened to be lucky enough that Celeste had the one big table and was therefore too busy to take him, even though it was her section. 

“Thanks for taking that table,” She sounds out of breath as she sets a drink tray down next to you, “I’m swamped with those fuckers over there. Tourists on vacation who want everything at that very moment. Including three Virgin Strawberry Daiquiris for the kids. I want to shoot myself.”

You smile to yourself as you make your way around to the beer cooler to grab a nice cold bottle of Bud, “Oh don’t worry about it. He shouldn’t cause any trouble anyway.”

If only she knew. 

“Here you go,” You say, sitting the open bottle down on his table, “Do you need a minute to look over the menu? Or do you have any questions?”

“What do you recommend?” He asked you, looking back up. 

“Pulled Pork Mac’n’cheese, easy,” You replied almost instantly, “Hands down my favorite dish here, after our Crab Dip appetizer, but I also eat that for a full meal.”

He smiles up at you and closes the menu before handing it back to you, “I’ll try that Pork Mac then.”

“Sounds good, I’ll get that right in!” You smile triumphantly before backing away once again, “Holler if you need anything, okay? I’ll be back to check on you before the food comes out.”

Back at the bar, Celeste is finally able to stop for a minute and catch her breath. She looks miserable and it makes you want to laugh a little. Her night would be very different if she just took Table Five instead. 

She’s hunched over her phone reading an article, which normally you would call her out on being on her phone but tonight you can’t be bothered. It’s slow enough and her phone is hidden anyway. 

“Hey, Bradshaw is up for a bunch of awards,” She grins, “He so deserves them. You remember how great he was in that war movie, right! That’s what’s being nominated.”

“Hmm?” You question before your brain seems to catch up with you, “Oh, yeah. No, he was great in that movie. Whole cast was, honestly.”

“Exactly! I hope they sweep at the Oscars, they all deserve it so much.”

You have to hide your smile as you type away on the POS to put in the order. In the back, you can hear your kitchen jamming out to some sort of heavy metal meets classic rock mix which isn’t all that unusual for them. There are some days you’ve come to work and they’ve been listening to Disney music. At this point you can’t even try to say that you understand what their playlists consist of. 

It takes ten minutes before you’re walking back over to the table with another beer in hand. You noticed he was starting to run low and you know better than to let a drink ever go empty. That was one of the first things you learned when you became a waitress. 

“Brought you another one,” You announce, setting it down. 

“Thanks, appreciate it,” He replies, “And uh, thanks for not freaking out on me. Would’ve been a bitch if I got swarmed in here.”

“No worries, I’m not a rabid fan or anything,” You laugh, “But I am curious as to why you’re here of all places. I thought you lived in LA?”

“I do,” He nods, “But this was home long before LA was. I was born here in Virginia, I like to come back and visit family from time to time.”

“Oh,” You’re taken back by his honesty. He could’ve easily told you that it was none of your business, which is what you expected, “That’s really nice actually.”

Celeste calls you, saying the kitchen wants you. Reluctantly you force yourself away from the table and towards the set of double swinging doors in the middle of the bar. Something about Bradley Bradshaw is drawing you in and you aren’t sure if you want to resist it or not. Surely he wouldn’t remember your name in a few hours. He’d forget about the server from Virginia the second he got on a flight back to LA and the way of the world would take back over. 

“Here’s that pork mac,” Chef told you, nudging the dish in the window, “Get it out of my sight.”

“Sir yes sir,” You reply, grabbing the hot dish, “Thank you!”

“Yeah yeah, fuck off,” He grumbled, which only made you smile. 

You made your way back towards Bradley’s table with a smile. You could see why Celeste was so enamored with him. There was just something about him that made you want to sit down and hang on his every word. Plus, he was hot as hell. He still had the mustache from his previous role, and was trying to hide behind his ball cap. He looked normal, almost.

You wondered how other people here saw him? Were they even paying attention to the bonafide star that was hiding out in the corner? Celeste would piss herself if she knew he was here, hell, you might even piss yourself if he smiled at you again. The thought made you a little weak in the knees. 

“Your pork mac,” You said, sitting it down on the table in front of him, “Be careful, it’s actually pretty hot.”

“Mmm, looks fantastic,” He nearly groaned, “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet, you don’t even know if you’ll like it!” You laughed, “But I hope you enjoy, and let me know if I can get you anything else.”

You hop away from him again, taking a deep breath as you go. Maybe the night wouldn’t be as bad as you thought.

[lamialamia]

howdy! could you rec a few of your favourite postwar sledgefu fics please?

I live to serve!

There are many excellent post-war fic for sledgefu, i mean, that train scene is so painful we need to fix it!

As It Was - SJTrinity. Two parter, one from Sledge one from Snafu's pov. I love the voice for both of them, it is like I'm walking in their heads. And the prose here is beautiful, it's so deep into their psyche with all the ugly gnarly crooks.

i’m the diode, you’re the kerosene - getmean. For me this reunion fic is the staple for the ship. I reread this a lot and it never get old!

gone but not entirely - marinersapptcomplex. Let's do post-war but angstier, okay? and a different settings to most postwar fics too.

Let Me Know The Way - barekare. Epistolary fic where we learn their lives after the war through bits and pieces. It's inventive and superb.

Sweet Water, Wash Me Down - modernature. The vibe of this fic is impeccable. You have Sledge going to the depth of the swamp to find Snafu; haunting atmosphere, got me the chills reading it.

you're soft as glass, and i'm a gentle man - getmean. Sledgefu as older men, dealing with their old age, and keep loving each other. So underrated even among getmean's catalogue, and I need to make more people read it!

Some sunny days - me. as in I wrote this. Feel so weird reccing my own fic but. i like this fic, a lot haha

enjoy reading and PLEASE tell me what you think. I'm always down to talk sledgefu fic with anyone and everyone 😁

[nocek]

Okay, the villain of ‘Madame Web’ is a variant of the Spider-Society’s Spider-Therapist. Could that maybe then serve as the premise of one of your comics? Either one of the Spider-Women the variant tried to kill ending up seeing the Spider-Therapist for therapy, or something else like that, like some GwenPool commentary or something?

oh my god why are you doing this to me this movie fucking sucked. And not in a fun way, or outraging way or even entertaining way it was just soooooo meh.

It had a vibe of like an already 20 year old movie that is shown on shitty tv station in the middle of the week and is so cut apart by the constant ads that you can't follow the plot. Which is ok because the "plot" in unfollowable.

The only entertaining version of that movie would be a movie that shows us how the fuck she used and perfected her premonition skill to [SPOILERS] drive around a cab that visibly hit a pedestrian, that has no plates but still has it's cab number, all around the city, then to the airport, then leave it at the airport for a week and then drive back from the airport a week later. Like fucking seriously XDDD This movie is anti cop propaganda XD which fair they are incompetent and could be believable but how the fuck did she avoid the other cab drivers in New York.?!!! They would fucking recognize their buddy's stolen cab in 0.1 second and like fucking tear hear a limb from limb [SPOILERS END]

But sorry I got distracted and started seething at this shit movie again. Anyway. I had no idea that character was based on him. To me spider therapist looked like just default Peter spidey in a suit and glases. But I guess you are using a comics canon here?

Cool to know but I don't have any idea to use this knowledge right now just as I've learned it. Association with that shit movie doesn't help either :S but we will see.

Right now I'm swamped with too many other ideas and too little time 😫

[helena-and-helena-meta]

The one thing he wished for

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was the story I had to rewrite, I rewrote it very early in the morning so this isn't completely proofread.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Atlas, the kingdom itself, is beautiful, but the people are another story. If you have less wealth than some, they’ll treat you like an insect under their shoe, but that’s mainly in the upper city. Mantle has those who can be kinder, but many only wish to survive, with the occasional Grimm attack and the soldiers patrolling the city causing unrest, which brings more Grimm. After Beacon fell, that unrest grew more and more, which brought more Grimm and more soldiers. This was the first time a huntsman academy had fallen. Then the news of Haven got out, as did the death of Leo Lionheart. It felt like Remnant was tearing itself apart at the very seams, and no one knew who was pulling the strings—well, no one but the four main headmasters—but now two of them had been killed, and the other two didn’t agree with each other’s methods.

The headmasters each had scouts: huntsmen and huntresses who graduated from the respective academies; Qrow reported to Ozpin; Lionheart had his hunters, but they all died; Theodore had many; and James had you. Those scouts watched over many things: the White Fang, which was now under the control of a more peaceful Faunus; the movements of the Grimm; and Remnant’s secret enemy, Salem. Reporting to James was a fifty-fifty thing. You two had served together in the academy before graduating, so you were close, but stress existed, and the war against Salem did, too. While he was always so sweet and civil with you, he allowed stress to overtake his mind, which caused Mettle to activate and throw things out of his control.

This was one time when you went to report the movements of the Grimm and Salem to him, and while you had news to give him, you couldn’t help but rush to see him. Every part of you wanted to see him to make sure he was okay. A smile graced your features with how quickly you were allowed in Atlas because of your status as one of General Ironwood’s most trusted. You held your scroll close to your chest as the elevator took you up. All you wanted to do was see his face, look into those beautiful blue eyes, see his smile, and maybe be gifted with one of his adorable chuckles. The sound of the elevator doors opening forced you out of your thoughts as you looked up and saw some of the Atlesian soldiers guarding his office. You showed them your huntsmen identification, and they allowed you to enter.

James didn’t seem to realize it was you when you entered his office. His tired expression broke your heart. He was swamped with paperwork, his eyes were sunken from many sleepless nights, and you also saw how his hands trembled slightly from his lack of self-care.

“Please tell me why you’re here.” James spoke softly, the sound of his pen scratching paper as he wrote, “James, it’s me.” That got his attention. It made him look up to meet your eyes. Your heart fluttered when you saw it, seeing his eyes light up with relief. “I wanted-”

You were cut off from finishing your sentence by James quickly jumping up and embracing you, holding you tightly to his chest as he stroked your hair. With you here, it felt like he could finally relax and let go of the breath he didn’t know he was holding.

James smiled as he held you close. How long has it been? When was the last time he had been this relieved to see someone and hold them in his arms? He was holding you close, just like how much worry he held over his people and the potential fall of Atlas. He ran his hand up and down your back, feeling your body—a sensation he missed so much. It was calming. It felt right. It was… It was home.

In this moment, he was yours and yours alone; if it wasn’t for the war against Salem, he would never let you go. If it weren’t for the war, then he would have you by his side all the time. If it wasn’t for the war...

But the war existed, and he wished it didn’t. That was the one thing he wished for.

[tobiasdrake]

One last task to take care of before we infiltrate Fort Fleshy.

I was twiddling them earlier when I was flying around the map just to see what I could find. This place is definitely an intricate combination lock.

Could be the key to releasing Duke Aventry. Might just be Roro's porn stash. Either way, we won't know until we've cracked it. Personally, I think we should forego the lock and just bring Yolande in to blow this support column to hell.

Sure, we can also do that. Yoyo knows everything and is loyal to no one, so there's no reason she wouldn't assist us but no guarantee that she would either. Worth a shot.

Your swamp is a maze and I hate it. Give me useful information or I'll make your other eye look like the one I'm wearing on this necklace.

...

I mean. Good afternoon, Yoyo. What a pleasant day we're having. Could you possibly help me break into your sister's porn stash?

Yep. Got it. Just like the Watchmaker. Not motivated enough to directly assist us but also not motivated enough to put up with the violence that's going to ensue if you don't. One whole "Not My Fucking Problem", served and delivered.

I've seen these runes before. I remember wondering what they were about. But the Roro Heist was so long ago, I'd forgotten.

Thanks, Yoyo. This was a fairly neutral level of non-assistance. Your cauldron didn't even tell me anything new; Just reminded me of answers I've already witnessed.

Here we go. The most closely-held secrets of the embodiment of evil incarnate....

...are a backdoor into this vault we've already been in. Okay but why tho.

What is even the point of this? The combination to the lock is written on the wall, and if you take that combination to an island off the coast and enter it into a secret crypt, it will open a passage to bring you right back here but now the treasure's unlocked.

This is the most roundabout key I've ever seen. Only a truly despicable mind would come up with something so needlesly convo-

...

Oh.

That's what the convoluted circuit loop lock is guarding? Roro makes this whole trip every single time she wants to write a new entry?

Well. We did not find her porn stash. Instead, we found her daily workout regimen. An awkward way to get your steps in but credit where it's due, it means she can't skip out on the routine.

Hold up, she repurposed your journal into her own? That is a whole new layer of domineering.

You need to get out of this relationship, my dude. Like. I think it's pretty clear at this point that she does not respect your personal space at all.

There is a vacancy. We butchered the creature that was occupying it, so if you want to go back, you can.

Oh cool, new Ferry ticket.

Honestly, not 100% sure why Aventry wanted us to come here. Unless this is the place he has fond memories of or something.

I dunno. We'll smash and grab first, then sift through the loot and figure out what we're supposed to do with it later.

Oh shit, it's Roro's private residence. That's what he gave us. I guess that other place was just her work office.

...do you think she'll be happy to see us? I guess there's really only one way to find out. *clears throat* HEY BESTIE--

How have you been? Raised any cool horrors lately? I saw your sister the other day, she seemed to be doing... adequately.

Anyway, we gotta talk about your boy. You're keeping the leash wound a little too tight and--

Okay, but was it really your journal? He had it first. How does that saying go? Two wrongs balance each other out and make everything ultimately fine.

But also that's lame and I prefer it when things are unbalanced in my favor, so now I need to rob you even more.

You heard her, team. We're looking for a locket. Fan out and--

Oh, yeah. We're old pals. It's just too bad she keeps her place in such a miserable state. Look at this place. Bones and flesh just lying strewn about.

I'd offer to help clean up but honestly, that sounds like too much work. Zale, you're pretty good with clutter, why don't you sweep the place.

There we go. Nice and spotless.

Ah, this brings back memories. There's something nostalgic about it. You never really forget your first armed robbery.

Pleasure doing business with you.

You know, we have to stop meeting like this. You going about your day. Me, beating the shit out of you and taking your things. It's getting stale. Why don't we do lunch sometime or something, just for a change of pace?

I think we hurt her feelings. Do... do you want to talk about it?

Uh, Roro says you're fired, by the way. Can't say I've ever been given a gift-with-purchase for a robbery before but she handed me the pink slip right along with the locket.

Yeah, I thought it was weird too.

Better luck in the next life, man. Hope the person waiting for you will treat you better.

[autisticlio]

Oh yeaaaah. Speaking of ending D, here's my crappy translation I made at like 1 am cause the og Twitter kinda confused me. Feel free to correct any mistakes.

At the edge of the pond, a young girl is holding a fishing rod, not moving an inch. Suddenly, the fishing rod loudly reels out, and the girl cries out. Her name is Gin.

Gin: “Here it comes! Here it comes!”

Having carried the Master of the Swamp back, Gin proudly stands in front of a woman. She then declares: “I caught the Master of the Swamp just as promised, mom!!” With her small voice, she begins to approach the woman even closer. “Now you won’t ask me to become a hunter ever again…!”

The woman can only simply nod. Gin leaves, continuing to hold the Master. “I thought catching the Master would have her finally come to her senses about being a hunter… Didn’t you?” said the woman. She questions her nearby husband.

The father replies: “Can’t exactly leave the island and take over the restaurant. This is what she wants. We should respect that.”

The mother remains somber. “Well, maybe you two will change your minds. Just why are you so interested in Gin doing this? Perhaps it’s because of her being related to great grandma Mito or Grandma Noko…?” It would seem she isn’t aware that Mito and Noko aren’t related either. The husband simply laughs. Persistence taking hold, she continues. “But! Grandpa Gon was a famous hunter…! I’m sure she was destined to leave as well.”*

In response, Gin suddenly shouts from the depths of the forest, where her parents can’t possibly see her: “‘cause I’m not leaving!”

The father happily mumbles to himself. “She’s a clever one.”

The scene soon changes to a restaurant that has existed since Mito’s time. Its main dish is being neatly sliced as all the parts are prepped. As they work, Gin thinks to herself: ‘Mom just doesn’t understand… Grandma always just casually excuses herself from the table whenever Grandpa recalls his youth as a hunter. All of Grandma Noko’s words may as well be someone else’s with how they’re filled with loneliness of not being with him.’ The cutting board is suddenly hit hard with a knife. ‘I don’t want this!!! I don’t want the pain of waiting months or years for someone to come home! Or to just wait for someone at all!! I…’

A door then opens. A calming, leisurely voice echoes into the restaurant. A young fat boy comes inside holding a plant. “I got some wild plants… Oh wow! You actually caught the Master of the Swamp! Okay, let’s serve it to all the islanders!”

Gin thinks, ‘I’ll always be… with the people I love the most forever!’

The boy continues, “Everyone looks really excited. Come on, let’s get to work!”

‘I’ll always be with you!!’ Gin replies, “Right!!” The duo cook together with large smiles on their faces.

A bird flies away from the island, up into the sky. Underneath is a town somewhere far away. Various people fill the streets. A son, another’s daughter, and someone’s grandchild living their lives, smiling and talking with someone. Perhaps they may be the children of a certain character, or the grandchild of that one. The bird flies back into the sky as someone watches it off.

The end.

[havendance]

Santaquest pt 5: Santa Strike Back!

Okay, let's speedrun some more Santa Comics:

DC Comics Presents #67

Superman and Santa Claus go up against the Toymaker! Did you know that Superman has a giant key to the fortress of sorrow that's shaped like a giant arrow?

Superman: If they doubt you, Tim--just tell 'em to ask me. Tim (not Drake): You bet I will! Nifty key! Superman: Thanks, it serves as an aircraft navigational marker mostly-- --since nobody else but supergirl or I can even lift it!

When Santa and Tim crash in the arctic, they are saved by none other than Santa and his elves!

Santa: Here, friend Superman is my top-secret workshop at the very heart of the North Pole! Superman: Workshop...? North Pole...? But that-- that's impossible--!?! You aren't... I mean you couldn't possibly be...

Anyway, Santa and Superman work together to stop the Toymaker's plot to hand out hypnotizing toys etc etc. We do get this nice moment:

Superman: I'm gonna crash-- and crash-- --hard?? Huh? I landed light as a feather--!? But my weight should have carried me cleand through this sleigh--! Santa: My sleigh was build to carry a far greater weight than yours, friend superman-- --for it carries the hopes and dreams of a worldful of children!

Best of DC #58

Others have already brought up Santa's unionized elves in this issue:

Santa: What about Christmas? Elf: That's not our problem--no winter--no work! That's our union contract!

I would like to further point out that while all the male kids who get justice league powers in this issue go on little adventures and solve problems before the final confrontation, our mini-Wonder Woman gets to end up in bondage instead:

Ah, wonder woman comics.

Elvira's House of Mystery Special #1

Two Santa appearences here. Firstly we've got the whole 'Santa healing a blind girl' think Zahri and Ink have already covered. That story also features our second instnce of death by santa sleigh in this read through!

The second one features him getting blasted by aliens in a post-nuclear winter scenario:

(Interestingly enough the Elvira christmas carol story at the begining (which I quite enjoyed) also featured what might have been a far future nuclear winter.)

Swamp Thing #115

Swamp Santa! With a coonskin cap and crocodile drawn sleigh!

Also read: Christmas with the Super-Heroes #2 upon recommendation which featured no Santa but really was quite good. (The Superman and Wonder Woman stories especially imo)

[friendlyfaded]

I saw one fanfic and I have to see more

Love(Asset)/Huxley

Okay, so I've been absolutely swamped with work lately, but I've finally got a few minutes! (and by that I mean I'm putting off lesson planning for right now because that's a headache and a half) So I figured I should work through some of these requests!

So with Asset and Huxley (calling them Love always leaves a bit of a bad taste in my mouth, all things considered), you've got two people who haven't really been allowed to be their actual selves for most of their lives. The circumstances are different, but they understand each other. Asset was directly manipulated via the obsession code. Huxley was forced into a box by the other people in his life in his attempts to fit in. While the situations differ, the effects will be related.

Asset has almost certainly been severely traumatized by what Marcus did. Abusive relationships have a significant impact on the way the victim sees relationships in the future. I doubt they'd be eager to jump into another relationship that quickly, and even once they do, they'd probably want to take things extremely slow.

On the other hand, we have Huxley, who is everything Marcus isn't. He's slow, gentle, considerate, and we all know that he's an absolute consent king. When he first met Freelancer, he was immediately ready to fight on their behalf. He showed instant concern for this stranger who bumped into him. His heart is so big and open, and that's something that Asset definitely needs in their life. If Huxley reacted with that kind of anger when Freelancer told him about Kody and the bridging, imagine how pissed off he'd be to hear about what Marcus did to Asset.

Huxley is a lover, not a fighter, but above all else he's a protector. If he needs to fight to keep those he loves safe, he will, and that would absolutely extend to Asset. If James wants Asset to see the good in humanity and become attached to them, Huxley would be probably the best candidate to help with that. His love is soft and unconditional, and he loves to give. Asset is used to being told what to do. They're used to serving the interests of others. Huxley would make damn sure they know that he wants to do the same for them. He wants them to have autonomy. He won't do anything they aren't one hundred percent okay with. Asset needs to regain that sense of autonomy. Hux would be amazing to help them do it.

[classicschronicles]

Hi lovelies,

Okay so listen, anyone who knows me knows that I am NOT a Disney fan. I will however admit that as a child I loved Hercules (mostly because I had a crush on Megaera but no one needs to know that). So the other day when I was looking for something to watch and Hercules popped up again and so today I thought it would tell you all about the twelve labours of Hercules. Also before we start I have to get this out of my system. HERCULES is the roman name. Disney fucked up because they were depicting the greek version whose name is HERACLES, not Hercules. Anyways!

Heracles was born a demigod, the son of Zeus and a mortal princess named Alcemene. Zeus’ infidelity (shocker) would enrage Hera (again shocker). Alcemene gave birth to Heracles and raised him with her husband Amphitryon. As Heracles was a demigod he was born with superhuman strength. Hera tried to kill Heracles as an infant by sending snakes into his crib, but his superhuman strength led to him strangling the snakes. You would think Hera got the message at this point, but no, her vengeance did not stop there.

As Heracles grew into an adult he married Megaera and had many songs. Hera, knowing how much Heracles loved his wife and sons, sent madness upon Heracles which eventually led to him killing his wife and children, thus taking away everything that he loved.

When Heracles regained his sensibilities, he realised what he had done and turned to Apollo for help. Apollo told Heracles that he had to serve the king of the Tiryns (Eurytheus) to repent for his crimes. Hera, still wanting to kill Heracles, suggested to Eurytheus that he order Heracles to complete 12 impossible labours, thinking that they would surely end in his death.

The first of these Labours was to slay the Nemean Lion. In a town called Nemea, there lived a lion that seemed invincible. The lion brought devastation and fear to the town and Heracles was ordered to slay the lion and bring back his hide as proof. Heracles was able to use his ungodly strength and bravery to choke the lion and bring the skin back to Eurytheus. Although versions differ because in some retellings Heracles keeps the skin for himself and wears it as a sign of his labours.

The second labour was to slay the Lernean Hydra. The swamp of the town of Lerna was the home to a Hydra (a nine-headed serpent) that would terrorise the locals. Hydras are known for having one immortal head that respawns two-fold every time it is chopped off. Long story short, Heracles enlisted the help of his nephew and the two of them were able to kill the hydra.

The third labour was to capture the Golden Hind. The hind was situated in a village called Ceryneia, and belonged to a deer sacred to Artemis (and therefore Heracles would not kill the deer). Instead, Heracles hunted the deer every day for a whole year. An opportunity to shoot the dear presented itself one day and Heracles seized the moment. On his way home, he encountered Apollo and Artemis and when asked to explain why he took the deer, he told them of his servitude. Artemis and Apollo agreed to let Heracles take the hind on the condition that he also return it, unharmed.

The fourth of these labours was to capture the Erymanthian Boar. Eurytheus ordered Heracles to bring him a wild boar from the mountains in Erymanthos. This labour is a bit strange in that, instead of just killing the boar, Heracles goes on a bit of a spree and kills a bunch of Centaurs, including his friend Pholos. When he finally goes about hunting the boar, he drove it into the snow and caught it in a net, and then presented it to Eurytheus.

The fifth labour was to clean the stables of King Augeas. Augeas’ stable housed over 1000 cattle and basically they STANK. Heracles approached Augeas and offered to clean the stables in one day, in return for 1/10 of the cattle. Augeas agreed to these terms as he thought Heracles would be unable to complete the task in one day. However, Heracles was a smart guy and so he rerouted two rivers to essentially flush out the stables and et voila they were clean. After Augeas learned that Heracles had been ordered to clean the stables by Eurytheus, he refused to pay Heracles his cattle. A judge then determined that Heracles deserved his prize, and so eventually Augeas handed over the 100 cattle. But, here’s the real kick in the teeth, Eurytheus (when he learnt that Heracles had used the river) told Heracles that this labour didn’t count. Harsh. I know.

The sixth labour was to defeat the Stymphalian Birds (a huge flock of birds gathered in the town of Stymphalos). The birds were fierce man-eaters so Heracles had to figure out how to safely remove them. Athena visited Heracles and gifted him with a noise-making clapper (icl I’m imagining something that looks like a baby rattle) to help scare the birds away. As the birds took flight, Heracles shot them all down with a bow and arrow. That’s half his labours done!

I think I might turn this into two parts and tell you all about labours seven through twelve next week. I hope you all enjoyed reading about the first half of these totally pointless labours, and I’ll see you all next week!

~Z

[jeeperso]

D&D Quotes Without Context

Revenge of CHAOTICA!, Episode 3

"...and that's how it all happened." Fiver finishes his exposition to the Lumbarans. "Fiver, there weren't any pineapples in that fight against the frost giants.” They just kind of look at you before the old Tabaxi woman in robes says, “I just asked if we could give you a place to stay for the night.” Thunderchild: “Ignore him, he's in love with the sound of his own voice. Actually as a cleric, he has probably married himself to the sound of his own voice. Probably as some sort of tax fraud.” Fiver: "No, but for tax purposes Katt needs 24 hour medical care and Robbins is seven people.” "Great, you creeped the old woman out. That is a new record on creeping out one of the locals.” Thunderchild: “Also Amber is legally registered as a combine harvester. Because reasons.” Amber: ”You better be joking about that one or I will use my new sword as a thresher on you." Thunderchild: One of the more subtle aspects of successful pirates is knowing how to navigate tax codes and contract law. Fiver: "Don't take it personally, it’s only to make sure you pass under emission standards, they're kind of sticklers for that on this planet. We're calling you a sports-utility warforged so they classify you as a light truck." "Giant space hamsters...I just know Tony the Fleshbender who lived 900 years ago is somehow behind these.” "Katt's good people, she's a little out of sorts lately because her girlfriend ascended to godhood. But deep down she's a sweet gal.” Moonpaw: "I'll have.....uh......Someone help me out here: I used to either get waited on or caught anything small and fast-moving.” "Okay," Katt says as she rejoins the others, "that's the glorious golden goofus taken care of. did I miss anything?” Thunderchild: “Moonpaw got ID'd and the party officially started apparently.” Amber goes over to the group. "We got sent a gay bar, guys. I hope this isn't a problem with any of you.” Moonpaw: "I don't care what kind of drink they serve.” "I don't believe in the greater good," Katt adds, pausing as if listening for something, then smiling at only party music. "Oh, I can get used to that.” Fiver casts Thaumaturgy to cause the ominous whispers of "The greater good" to echo in the distance.

Fiver: "Sorry Katt, the Incarnum pays me three copper every time I do that.” Katt: "The sad part is that they will do that.” Katt is very happy with the box housekeeping left for her. OOC: Query: Can I use the light spell as a laser pointer? Katt: "I call the pink one.” Moonpaw spends five minutes sniffing and circling the hamsters, before choosing one seemingly at random to ride tandem. "...I think I was out sick the day they were teaching about the wellspring in Seminary.” OOC: (And by "Out sick" we mean he got drunk and went cow tipping with the gang.) A small winged creature resembling a monkey with macaw wings crawls out of Thunderchild's bag and jostles with Robin for space on Thunderchild's Shoulder. Robbins: “Oi! Have-at-you! Hey!” Robbins commenses an epic slap fight before eventually conceding Wilsons shoulder rights Robbin “s:This-is-a-tree-and-this-is-another-tree.I-think-we-go-north-which-is-by-this-moss-which-is-on….A-tree!" Katt: ”Are swamps supposed to smell like a Jammerstop bidet?” Fiver: ”Don't sweat it, you were born domesticated, it will take time for your animal instincts to resurface.” "This-is-not-good. Nope. Definately-an-imbalance-in-the-natural-way-here. My-fairy-senses-are-very-uncomfortable-here.” The shadow clone falls over and holds up a lilly. Fiver: "But you know us rabbits, we're good at multiplying." Robbins: Gesturing at the swamp things “How-about-we-practice-our-division-and-subtraction?” “ALRIGHT-SECOND-GO.Plugging-my-nose!ATTTAACK!" GM: You remain thereal…. "I am de-thereal.” Fiver: ”Perhaps, but I am starting to think this corruption is being caused by deliberate Malice, and our wayward Leonine may have bit off more than he can chew.” Robbins: ”Ew-I-hope-he-didnt-try-eating-them.” GM OOC: Aight! Tonight’s gonna be fun if you’ve got a swamp thing fetish! OOC: So we shouldn't bring our evil here. OOC2: Like are we talking “DC Swamp Thing” or like “creature from the black lagoon” type swamp thing? Very difference fetishes. GM OOC: Yes. OOC2: So we're going to see a plant zombie making out with a fishman? OOC: The sequel to Shape of the Water the studio is too cowardly to let Del Toro make. OOC: Bugs Bunny is probably the pope of his church. Fiver: “The Owlin are ruthless robber barons, and also terrible, terrible wordsmiths.” OOC: Adam. Warren. This is a guy who looks at Chris Claremont and says “hold my beer.” And the result will be both way sleezier and more wholesome at the same time.

[h0dgep0dgee]

So, this is just "Hodgepodge wanted to do the writing equivalent of those really satisfying watch repair videos/that One Scene in Toy Story Two and then got distracted with literally everything else. Calliope and Insect are here! There's a bit of the Sorrows but joy at the end! Also, a little robit froggy with the self-preservation skills of a 12-year old anime protagonist! @thefroggypond you've already seen this but it's your child and your frog so I'm tagging you.

Blip the Amazing Automatic Amphibian

Insect was gone for a very long time. They were shut off and neatly tucked away in a closet, not dangerous enough for the vault, not mysterious enough to keep their location a secret. Just... clicked off and tossed aside.

    Calliope tried to bring them back, she really did. Every day for almost a year, she and the Spine worked on the other automaton, trying to find a malfunction, a flaw, anything to justify their deactivation. But there was nothing wrong. Nothing was broken, nothing was missing, Insect was just... gone.

    It took almost 60 years for them to wake up. A shoved-away memory climbed back to the surface, VI was nearly dragged to the unceremonious hallway cupboard where the automaton rested, and within a few weeks, they were up and running again. It didn't make sense. It was wonderful, of course, it was! But it didn't make sense. Calliope had tried for months to bring Insect back, and nothing happened! After all this time, why was it so easy now?

    It didn't matter. It's fine. Insect was back! So what if Calliope couldn't bring them back? There was someone else who she could.

    Blip showed up when Insect did. Years before Calliope was built, Insect's creator died in a house fire, leaving the automaton and their tiny, tinkered frog behind. They were taken to a family friend, the only person who could maintain the robot, the man who had helped build them. From the time she was first activated, Calliope never knew a time without her best friend rambling on about orchid mantises or one-gilled swamp eels, with the frog always hopping at their heels.

                                  • • •

    Calliope sat down at the scratched-up old rolltop desk she'd turned into a workbench. Watchmaker's tools, brushes, rags, and a cup filled with soapy water were neatly laid out on one side. From one of the dozens of tiny drawers, she removed an even smaller box that jangled as she set it down on the desktop and opened it. Bits and pieces tinkled and shone like bells as she carefully poured them out, looking for missing parts. Okay. Two Wheels, five of the jewels, two of his front toes, and- now, where did that eye go? I JUST saw it!

     The wheels and jewels were easy enough to find. There were more broken pocket watches in that desk than she knew what to do with. She could replace the eye with a blue cat's eye marble. Both would need replacing by now anyway. The foot with the missing toes would be a bit more complicated. She had quite a few old wind-up toys, broken and abandoned and picked up again to be puzzled over when the world got too loud or the inside of her head too quiet, but scrapping those felt wrong, somehow. She knew that none of them were sentient, that any creatures like Blip were too valuable to be tossed away like the little tin trains and terriers she'd collected. Still, she winced as she removed the hand of a clockwork soldier. His hairspring had snapped in seven places, and he hadn't marched in years, so Calliope hoped he wouldn't mind that drumming would be a bit more difficult for a while as well.

    She cleaned all the frog's pieces, polished and repainted the sea green enamel that served as the creature's "skin," and laid out all the bits and bobs formerly and soon to be known as Blip back on the table. Now it was time for her favorite part. Each piece went together slowly and carefully, snapping together with a satisfying Click! She soon felt her thoughts fade altogether and watched her hands move, almost on their own, as the tinkered treefrog reformed, bit by bit.

    After hours of work, Blip was almost entirely whole again. All that was left was his core. A polished blue crystal, rounded into an orb an wrapped in wires, not much larger than his marble eyes, sat patiently in Calliope's hand, still glowing faintly after all those years. Carefully, she dropped the sphere into the locket-like hollow in the frog's belly and snapped it shut. For a few seconds, the frog lay limp on the desk. Slowly, ever so slowly, a cerulean blue glow began to light up the swirl in his marble eyes. Blip looked up at Calliope, eyes as big as saucers in his little head. He let out a chirp... and promptly sent himself sailing off the edge of the desk. Calliope scrambled to grab the frog, knocking over her chair and herself in the process. Now on the floor, she grabbed Blip's box, knocked off the desk in the fray, and unceremoniously jammed the now-whole frog back inside.

    "Blip, you know you can't be doin' things like that. Insect just got back, and it'd break their heart if you went smashin' yourself to bits before they even got a chance to see you!" Calliope fumed, looking every bit like a mad woman scolding a perfectly non-sentient wooden box on the floor. "Come on, you little dummins. Let's get you home."

    Calliope carried Blip-in-the-Box to the kitchen, where Hatchy was trying, with limited success, to keep Rabbit and Zer0 out of a bowl of cookie dough. "Have y'all seen Insect anywhere?" she asked, weaving through the chaos to a cupboard. She ducked as a whisk went flying and quickly snatched a mug and a teacup before a muffin tin was fired in return. "I think they'RE IN THE LIBRARY," Rabbit suddenly shouted as she dove after her brother, who at this point had the bowl precariously balanced on his head. "Thank you, Rabbit," Calliope replied, "and leave that cookie dough alone. You both know Chelsea and Camille hate having to scoop that gunk outta your boilers, and I must say, I ain't too fond of it either." She grabbed and filled a pitcher of water before racing out of the room, leaving the cacophony of the kitchen behind.

                               • • •

    It took a few minutes of wandering through the library to find Insect curled up in a corner, arms wrapped around their legs, chin resting on their knees, and a thick book lying open at their feet. "Hey, Jitterbug. Whatcha readin'?" Cal asked as she sat beside the other robot, mirroring their position on the floor almost exactly. "A book on taxonomical classification," the other automaton replied, not looking up from the pages. "Did you know that fish do not technically exist anymore? Obviously, fish as animals still exist, but the use of "fish" as a classification is no longer functional because it lumps them all together simply because they all live in the water. It is like if you tried to call all animals who live in Canada-"

   "Okay, I would love to hear about the fish in just a second, I really would, but first, I have a present for you." At this, Insect raised their head curiously.

    "Really? What is it?"

     "Well, it's more of a who, really, but it's someone who's missed you somethin' fierce since you've been gone." Calliope pulled the box from her dress pocket and handed it to Insect. "Be careful, now. He just woke up, too, and he's hoppin' mad about bein' asleep for so long." Insect held the box out as far as they could and slowly opened it. Once again, the frog leaped through the air, but this time landed with a satisfied plop on Insect's shoulder. The frog looked up at the other robot, let out a happy, musical trill, and settled into an infuriatingly adorable loaf.

   "Hello, little friend! What have you been up to?" Insect chirped back at the frog, both of them looking at each other with the same goofy, broad, froggy smiles on their faces.

   "Okay, what were you saying about fish not existing anymore?" Cal asked as she poured water into the cups, one an antique teacup painted with tulips, the other a mug with "I'm Here for Morelle Support," and a drawing of a webby brown mushroom printed on the side. She handed the mug to Insect, whose face lit up both with the realization of the pun and excitement to share more about their newly attained taxonomical knowledge.

   "Oh! Right! So, for example, a lungfish is more closely related to a cow than to a shark, and NEITHER is related to-" Insect went on about the family trees of different fish, which one lived on which branch, how sharks and stingrays weren't even cousins, but the same group that tuna and mackerel belonged to held a deep sea nightmare that could eat fish bigger than itself. The three of them sat on the library floor for hours, talking about fish and feathers and flightless birds, and Cal quite believed that she'd never been happier.

    Her best friend had been gone for a very long time.

   But now they were back again.

[joemomma01]

'Cooking just ain't yo style' Chiffany story (Full version)

is doesn't make any sense!" Tiffany says, rereading the recipe she found on a cooking magazine.

"What doesn't make any sense tiff?" Chucky asked as he started to chop down on some of his pork rinds. Tiffany was trying to make a 'Seared Rib Eye Steak with Cinnamon' to try and impress chucky, but that didnt really go to well....

Tiffany was sitting on the kitchen counter trying to reread the recipe she had found sticking outside the dumpster located behind their apartment. The magazine was old, torn up, had sticky stuff everywhere that made it hard to open the book, and mud on it here and there. Chucky had absolutely no idea, why she decided to get a magazine out the trash. When she could simply go to there local dollar general that had plenty of different magazines for her. Cooking magazines I must say.

"Tiff, how about you just go and get another magazine. NOT from the dumpster." Chucky implied, while stuffing his mouth full. Tiffany shook her head, "From where then?"

"From the STORE?" He rolled his eyes and put his feet up on the mini living room table. Tiffany sighed. Chucky was right. She needed to get a new cooking book since she could BEARLY read or even use the one she had. Based on how messy it was. She stretched and went to put on her Criss-Cross Strapped heels on the shoe rack.

"I be back shortly" Tiffany said as she grabbed the keys and stumbled out the front door still trying to finish putting her heels on. Chucky nodded, and went back to whatever he was doing.

Later:

Tiffany rushed through the front door and immediately came into the kitchen. "Okay, Chucky I got a new magazine! And it's time to start cooking!" She said happily, little did she know Chucky was knocked out on the couch SLEEP.

She turned to the pages and found a new simple but fancy recipe for chucky. 'Baking-Sheet Pizza with Olives and Sun-Dried Tomatoes' She read. 'Okay.... Let's get this started.'

Ingredients:

⅓ cup extra-virgin olive oil, divided

1½ pounds pizza dough

1⅓ cups tomato sauce

1 cup grated Parmesan cheese

1 cup grated mozzarella cheese

1½ cups diced provolone cheese

½ red onion, thinly sliced

1 cup oil-packed sun-dried tomatoes

1½ cups pitted marinated olives

Directions:

. Preheat the oven to 450°F. Grease a baking sheet with 3 tablespoons of the extra-virgin olive oil

Gently stretch the pizza dough over the baking sheet and then use your fingers to stipple the dough further. Brush the surface of the dough with the remaining olive oil and let it rest for 15 to 20 minutes.

Stipple the dough again; it should now stretch to the edge of the baking sheet. Spread the tomato sauce evenly over the dough.

Sprinkle the Parmesan, mozzarella and provolone evenly over the sauce. Arrange the red onion, sun-dried tomatoes and olives in an even layer.

Transfer the baking sheet to the oven and bake until the cheese is melted and golden brown and the crust is well browned, 18 to 20 minutes.

Let cool 5 to 10 minutes before cutting and serving warm.

"Hmmm, This might be interesting...." Tiffany smiled as she started to dump all the ingredients forgetting to read the directions. She mixed, and mixed, and mixed, all the ingredients into 3 bowls before putting into a cooking pan.

Chucky had just woke up cracking his back walking up to Tiffany. "WHAT THE HE-" Tiffany cut him off. "Gosh Chucky, I know, it doesn't look good does it?" Chucky looked at the pan. It looked like a swamp ngl. "It looks very uhm.... Interesting? Something new." Chucky lied and Tiff rolled her eyes. "Have u atleast cooked it?" I don't know if I should. It doesn't look good now, nor' does it smell any good, if I finish making it it might not be any better." Tiffany sighed. Chucky tried to hold back his laughter of how much Tiffany didn't know how to do correctly.

"Well we should just chill and eat pork rinds, try again tomorrow?" Chucky suggested. Tiffany nodded upsetting. "I guess cooking isn't my style." She turned around to face Chucky. "Yeah, Cooking just ain't yo style" He shrugged looking back, before giving Tiffany a warm hug to comfort her. She smiled and looked up at him. "Lets go to a restaurant instead." He snickered.

Srry if it's kinda bad... I kinda got lazy at the end. (And yes, I did put a real recipe there.) Fanfic finished for @teoleeray