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quirkless-accident · 3 years ago

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Honesty is the Worst Policy

Let's hear it for drabble #50! I've been super excited for this one. Words cannot describe how much I appreciate all of you. Your support and enthusiasm makes writing these much more fun, and I'm happy that you all are as excited about these as I am!

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The day had started off normal. Great, even. But he should have known to wait for the other shoe to drop.

It happened during lunch. He had gotten a stain on his blazer, and, well, his parents already didn't like buying him things, and it's not like he could afford another. So he was doing His Best™.

He had been chatting actively with Tucker, Sam, and another one of Sam's new gen ed friends, who had reached over him to slap Tucker, and had used his arm as leverage.

But he hadn't noticed. Nobody had. Not until he had gotten slammed into a wall by Bakugou and his dumb explosions during Foundational Heroics.

"Are you okay?" Uraraka had asked, hands hovering over him.

Yeah, I'm good, is what he had tried to say. What had come out was, "No. My head hurts, I'm tired and I'm pretty sure at least one rib is broken."

That had been more than enough for him to get his ass sent to Recovery Girl. And like always, as the end of the session she asked the same question.

"Anything else, Dearie?"

And he tried to respond with his usual, "Not today! Maybe tomorrow I'll have a concussion for you!"

And then she would swat him with her cane and send him on his way. What came out, however, was nothing like that.

"Not anything you can fix. I'm kind of a biological anomaly that can't be fixed."

He fled before she could ask him questions. She would probably tell Aizawa about it later, but that honestly sounded like a future-Danny problem. Present-Danny was currently trying to get a hold of Sam.

"Aren't you at training?" She asked him.

"Bakugou broke my ribs and I had to get them fixed," he says, and he can't tell if it was against his will or not. "But something is wrong. I can't-the words that I want to say aren't coming out. I just told Recovery Girl I was essentially a freak of nature. And I didn't want to."

"Sounds like Shinjistsu accidentally activated her quirk," Sam replied. She sounds far to calm about this for Danny's liking.

"Okay. Where is she so I can turn it off?" He'll apologize for his snappiness later. Right now he needs to get his brain fixed so he doesn't accidentally spill anything terrible.

"You can't. It has to wear off on it's own. I think she said it lasted a week? Maybe a month? I'll have to double check with her. I think part of it is answering all questions directed towards you, too. Honestly, obviously."

Danny wanted to scream out in frustration, but instead of doing that, he forced himself to take deep breaths. "I'll have to give you my phone, then, just in case," he said. "And I have to tell Aizawa. Maybe if I'm lucky he'll excuse me from class until it wears off."

"Why don't you just tell him the truth?" Sam asked. "I mean, if anybody is going to believe you-and help you-it's gonna be the guy who got totaled by a Nomu for you."

"Because he might tell my parents and they already don't like me. And you know how they feel about Inviso-Bill. I don't really wanna be strapped down to a table and experimented on, Sam."

"Ugh. Right. Listen-I'm super sorry but I have to go. But talk to Aizawa, I'm sure he'll help you out."

-------

Sam is a big fat liar.

He had turned over his phone to her after telling Aizawa who told him he still had to attend class.

"Whatever petty teenager bullshit you have going on isn't important enough to have you skip out on class," he had said.

It wasn't too bad at first. For the first two days he wasn't asked too many questions. Not any that he wouldn't have answered honestly anyway. And when they got back to the dorms, he would hide away in his room and work on homework to avoid a mental breakdown.

Aizawa had notified all of the teachers, but none of his classmates, per Danny's request. The less questions he got, the better. And man, were they good at asking needlessly invasive questions sometimes.

It was on the third day when everything went to shit.

He was walking into class, debating on whether or not he wanted to invest in some kind of muzzle when he was hit with a question by his least favorite person.

"Danny-what bra size is your sister?" Mineta asked him from across the room. His voice carried, and nearly everybody went quiet, but Danny saw red.

"I don't know. I don't care. But if you ask me anything like that ever again," he let his eyes flash a dangerous green, "then I'll punt you into the fucking sun."

"Geez, no need so be so sensitive. Why is your quirk so creepy like that, anyway?"

"Because I'm dead."

The words had left his mouth before he could even properly process Mineta's question. And it was said with such a finality, such a certainty, that even if he hadn't been under the effects of a truth quirk, he's pretty sure a couple of them would have believed him.

"He, yeah, right," Mineta said. Danny could practically feel Mr. Aizawa's gaze on the back of his neck despite the fact that he was hiding behind his desk in his sleeping bag. "Tell us the truth."

"I am."

He's starting to think that maybe he should have let Aizawa tell the class he was under the effects of a truth quirk.

"Oh yeah?" Kaminari asked. "How'd you die?"

"I got electrocuted with millions of volts of ectoplasmic electricity and it bonded to my DNA."

There was a bark of laughter and a couple of applauds from his friends for committing to what was obviously a very hilarious bit. But the more he spoke, the more he could feel Aizawa's gaze boring into him.

But thankfully, he was saved by the bell.

---------

"Class dismissed," Aizawa drawled, but his sharp eyes were sitting firmly on Danny, who didn't move an inch. "Fenton, stay behind."

He wanted to punt Mineta into the sun. It hadn't been a threat when he said it earlier. It had been a promise.

The class cleared out quickly enough. His friends only lingered for a couple of moments before being dragged away by other classmates. The entire time, Danny stared at his desk, unable to look up and face his teacher.

Because Aizawa knew he had been telling the truth. Had known that he couldn't lie. And now he knew he was a freak and he was going to tell his parents, and when they found out they were going to strap him to the table in the basement and-

"Danny, breathe," Aizawa told him, stepping into his vision. Danny squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head.

"I don't need to," he said against his will. "Fuck."

If Aizawa had a problem with his swearing, he didn't show it. Instead, he sat down in the chair in front of Danny's desk and placed a warm hands over his cold, trembling ones.

"Are you okay with answering a few questions?" He asked. And, wow. Danny hadn't been expecting that. He had been expecting a full-tilt investigation into his weird tragic backstory. But Danny could see it. It was the illusion of choice, whether Aizawa saw it like that or not. He could answer yes, and spill his guts. Or he could answer no, and be pestered about it later, and with his terrible luck, he wasn't going to count on that being a time where he was vulnerable.

So he nodded his head yes.

"What did you mean by you being dead?" He asked. Danny just shrugged.

"Exactly what it sounds like," he says. "Sort of. I'm half dead."

"How did-how did you survive?" Danny didn't miss the hesitation in his voice. The uncertainty of the words coming out of his own mouth. And Danny couldn't blame him, not really. If he was Aizawa, even with a truth quirk playing a part in all of this he wouldn't believe a word he said either.

"My parents are ghost hunters and they experiment a lot with ectoplasm. I think a lifelong exposure is the only thing that saved me. Er-well, half of me, anyway."

"So your other half-your Phantom form...That's your ghost form?"

"Yeah. My superpower is dying on command."

"That's not funny."

"I'm not trying to be."

A tense silence fell between them. Danny met dark eyes, but the only thing he could see in them was genuine concern. And...And maybe Sam was right, he thinks. Because the only thing Aizawa has ever done for him is help. Whether it be from a panic attack or a walk to Recovery Girl or giving him harder course work because everything else was just to easy. He helped Danny in any way he could.

Could he help here?

Danny averted his gaze to his shoes.

They were bright red with black laces, and more bulky than the average shoe. There was only one brand that sold half-decent shoes that fit the feet of quirkless people, and they only came in one color. It was a constant reminder that he was different. Even with the power that he had now, he was still different. Because he had things that he didn't need, like an appendix, wisdom teeth, an extra toe joint.

He's seen Midoriya with the exact same pair. There was an understanding between the two, though they hadn't talked about it. Maybe after all this was over he would spill his guts to him. But right now, he needed to spill his guts to Aizawa.

Because if anybody was going to help him it was him.

-------

Aizawa wanted to throttle the people who hurt his kid student. From the beginning Danny's been a twitchy, anxious mess, just like Midoriya, but he had passed it off as social anxiety because he wasn't the one breaking his bones every day.

And he wasn't stupid. He noticed the shoes. He and Midoriya had the same ones. As an Underground hero he's seen more than his fair share of quirkless murders or suicides. Always young. Always powerless.

But these kids have power. Almost too much, if he was being honest. He figured that maybe they just had abnormally wide feet, and needed the extra space. But after hearing Danny's confession-about his parents, about his death, he was cursing his past self for being so ignorant. He should have looked at the signs and connected the dots a lot sooner than this.

And the worst part was that he was telling the truth. There's no way he could tell a lie.

"Why...Why didn't you say anything sooner?" Aizawa had asked him.

"Because I didn't want you telling my parents," Danny answered.

"Are you safe at home?" Fuck, was this kid abused? It happened often with quirkless kids. And he could see it being a super awkward conversation with his parents that he was just a late bloomer. A late bloomer with a quirk directly tied to their profession.

"I don't know," Danny answered. "Probably not. They're not good parents."

The words seemed to slip from him without consent, and Danny's eyes widened, as if he was just realizing this for the first time. It was a possibility-it's not uncommon for the abuser to make their victim completely rely on them, or to make them think nothing was wrong.

"If you elaborate-depending on what you say-I can get you out of their custody by the end of the week."

"Including my sister?" Danny asked. His voice was quiet, and he was suddenly met with wide, blue eyes. They looked absolutely desperate for help.

"Including your sister. So...Do you want to elaborate?"

"Yes."

"Are you okay if I record this conversation? It can be used as evidence later."

"Yes."

"Okay," Aizawa said, starting a recording on his phone. "What makes you feel unsafe in your home, Danny?"

------

They had talked for hours. Long past the normal time for a teacher and a student to be speaking. Maybe he could just pass it off as a tutoring session. It was no mistake that Danny was working on more advanced math and science classes. Growing up in a lab gave you a leg up on some things, he supposes.

He was drained, and all he wanted to do was eat and go to bed. Maybe he could skip the shower and just take one in the morning. He hadn't gotten to gross from training.

He held a hand over his mouth as he let out a large yawn, while his other opened the door to the dorms. It was around dinner time, so the common room was in full swing with students milling about here and there. Danny genuinely enjoyed his time with all of them, but tonight he just didn't have the energy. Maybe he could sneak upstairs and just have a big breakfast. That could work, right?

"Hey, Danny!" Uraraka greeted. "Did your talk with Mr. Aizawa go okay? You were gone for a long time."

"Yeah, it went...Really good, actually. But I'm really tired so-"

"-What did you guys talk about?" Kaminari asked him.

"About how my abusive neglectful parents inadvertently caused my death."

"Wh...Bro, are you okay?" Several others were starring at him now, and-oh, that's right. They didn't know he was under the influence of a truth quirk.

"Not currently, no. I had a really emotionally draining conversation with Aizawa and I'm tired of being so open and vulnerable with everybody."

"Then why don't you just shut up?" Bakugou barked. He got a couple of glares from his friends for his trouble.

"Because I got hit with a truth quirk and now I'm forced to tell the truth. It'll last for another...four days? That's what Sam said, anyway."

"So if we ask you questions you have to answer truthfully?" Sero asked.

"Yeah, pretty much."

"So...You're actually...Dead?" Ashido asked him. She looked like she was about to cry.

This was going to be a long night.

"Half dead," he corrected. "It's why I have so many powers that aren't linked together."

It was strange, hearing these words coming from his own mouth. It wasn't hard to talk about with Sam and Tucker since they were there when it happened, but telling his classmates was a completely different experience. He wasn't stressed necessarily. It was just odd that his normal anxieties about being caught were overridden by the quirk.

And, maybe, there might be a small part of him that was tired of hiding. He trusted his friends. Everyone in this room, with the exception of a tiny purple menace, he trusted with his afterlife. If anybody was going to hurt him over this, it wouldn't be these guys.

"What was your quirk before you died, kero?" Tsu asked.

"I didn't have one," Danny answered automatically, and okay. Maybe things would change now. Because he definitely didn't want people knowing that.

He noticed the way Midoriya and Bakugou flinched, but it was missed by everybody else, who's attention were all laser focused on him.

The class was stunned into silence. The only sounds they could hear was Danny's rapid, panicked breathing. He didn't want this. He didn't want to talk about his quirklessness. It had caused so many problems for him his entire life. Why was talking about his death easier than that?

He would have to answer that question later. Because now, he was too distracted by Midoriya standing up. He slowly walked over, and when he got to be arms length, he held them out.

His arms were littered in self-inflicted scars from his bones breaking over and over, but with his sleeves riding up, he could see the edges of starburst scars and permanent red handprints.

Danny opened his own arms out, and Midoriya crashed into him. His ribs were thankfully fully healed. otherwise the hug would have been painful with how tightly Midoriya was squeezing him.

He's not sure how long they stood there for. It could have been seconds or minutes, but he didn't care. The only thing he cared about was finding comfort with the one other person in this entire school who could understand him.

Because being quirkless in a world full of superheroes was a fate worth than death.

It was abusive parents. It was being berated every day by peers. It was hard fists and brutal kicks in back alleys. It was the threat of death looming over their heads every time they were out and about. It was the ache in their chests when they read an article about another quirkless death. It was the silent mourning as peers mocked the dead the next day and pretending that it didn't bother you. It was starring over the edge of a roof and thinking, maybe today's the day. And, unless your last name was Fenton or Midoriya, it was unescapable.

At least with death, he had been, in a way, set free. Because now, he knew where he was going when he finally passed. The illusion of peace was broken right alongside him when he activated that dumb portal.

Eventually he and Midoriya let go. Unsurprisingly, Midoriya has tears in his eyes, but he's got a small, watery smile, and Danny thinks that, yeah, with someone who understand by his side, this will be easier.

------

The rest of the week is a little rough. The class did not take his death as lightly as he thought they would. Thankfully they had banned Mineta from even being in the room. And they had promised not to tell anybody outside of the class.

And though things were a little weird, it wasn't all bad. Aizawa, as promised, had gotten custody of him and Jazz. Over breaks and some weekends, they would be staying with him. And Hagakure, who's been pestering him about his nonexistent love life since the start of school, finally got him to confess about his crush. Danny avoided her for the rest of the week, and prayed to whoever was in the sky that she didn't spill the beans.

Todoroki was, oddly enough, a silent comfort. Whenever things were getting to be too much he would ask Danny to help him out with something random. In the end, they would just sit in one of their rooms and sit in a comfortable silence, or sometimes they would invite Izuku-because that's who he was to Danny now-and they would talk about shitty fathers with unrealistic expectations.

Danny found the whole ordeal oddly freeing. It was like he could breath properly again for the first time since he got his powers. He hadn't realized how much those secrets sat in the back of his mind, taunting him about his peer's reactions. But now that it was out in the open, there wasn't anything to fear. Not really. The people who knew all cared about him, in their own ways, and he trusted that they would protect his secret.

After all his dirty laundry was aired out, the rest of the week wasn't super terrible. But the best part was when how he found out the quirk wore off.

It was a bright Saturday, filled with a warm breeze and laughing classmates as they all hung out in their various friend groups. The girls were having a picnic, Kaminari, Kirishima, and Sero were actively trying to piss Bakugou off, and Midoriya and Uraraka were laughing at something Ida had said-and judging by the boy's face, he had no idea what was so funny, which sent his friends into another round of hysterics.

Sam, Tucker, Shinsou, and Shinjitsu, who had apologized profusely, sat with him under the shade of a tree. He was half-asleep next to Shinsou, laying in the soft grass and being lulled to sleep by the sounds of Sam talking and Tucker tinkering.

Hagakure, Jirou, and Momo walk up to them, all looking a little too smug.

"So, we Danny, we were talking about what you said to Mineta a few days ago," Jirou says, and wow, she's not trying to hide her mirth at all.

"Which part?" Danny asked, still half asleep.

"When you said you would punt him into the sun," Hagakure said excitedly. "You were under the truth quirk. Does that mean you can really do that?"

"No, I was just talking out of my ass," Danny said. The sarcasm was more of a reflex than anything, but it was enough for him to jolt upright a moment later.

"Hagakure, gimme a lie."

"Uh, you can't punt Mineta into the sun?"

"I can't pun Mineta into the sun," Danny repeated. He couldn't keep the grin off of his face as he jumped up. Without warning he picked up Hagakure excitedly. He repeated the phrase, growing louder every time he said it. The attention of his classmates were on him again, more confused than anything.

"I don't see why you're cheering about that," Uraraka tells him. Danny sets Hagakure down and runs over.

"It means I can lie again! I'm more than capable of punting him into the sun but now I can say I can't!"

In all his excitement, he wound up in a jumping circle with all of the girls, save for Jirou and Momo, who had a finger on her chin in deep though.

And after, Danny will be pestered about how he can go to space, unharmed. About how, yes, he doesn't need to breath in his ghost form, he's dead, so he can last long enough to get to the sun. And Aizawa will give him a half-concerned raised eyebrow and makes him promise to not actually commit to such an act.

And later he will also have to go to court against his parents and admit to them that he is no longer fully human. He will have Aizawa and Jazz by his side, as well as Nezu. And he will fight great, wonderful battles that bring the rest of them to their knees, but Danny has always been stubborn, so he refuses to go down. And when the ash will settle, he will stand tall as a glowing beacon of hope.

But that's for future Danny to worry about.

Right now, Present Danny is just excited that he can punt Mineta into the sun.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #truth quirk #izuku midoriya #deku #red shoe theory #shouta aizawa #eraserhead #dadzawa #boku no academia #my hero academia #bnha #mha #dp mha crossover #tw: sui mention

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hcrringtonshair · 4 years ago

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I'll Make It Short

Sam Wilson x Reader

Word Count: 1492

Warnings: fluff - lots of that, a cheesy Sam, reader being a pain in the ass, mentions of smut (I'll make it +18 just to be save), a few cursing words

A/n: Thank you @speedycatbluebird for requesting this! I first thought I can't do this because for me Sam isn't all that romantic but for me I found a good way to make him romantic but not too ooc. I hope you'll enjoy this and I'm sorry for the cursing words and my failure to write it without hints of smut. AND sorry for me taking so long! Oh and This is not beta read! (As always haha)

All feeback, comments, reblogs and likes are welcomed!<3

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Send your requests!

With a loud sigh you took the last bite of the cake on your plate. Eating this sweet stuff wasn’t a good choice while the hot sun burned down on you.

“Call me a superhero for finishing this without dying.”

You groaned while leaning to the site, resting your head on the shoulder of Sam who was sitting next to you.

His body vibrated at his laughter as he wrapped one arm around you and Bucky in front of you grinned.

“Aren’t you already?”

AJ, next to Bucky lifted his eyebrows and Cass besides him nodded.

“She’s the coolest aunt that’s for real.”

You joined the laughter at the table, feeling your chest warm up by the kind words of the boys.

“The only thing that’s left is that your uncle makes her your aunt for real.”

The murmured words of Sarah on your other side let you freeze for a second, and you look up to Sam’s face to check if he heard her.

But he was chatting with Bucky again and even if he heard it, he acts like nothing happened.

“Babe I’m tired.”

Hours later you still leaned on Sam’s shoulder listening to his stories about the fight in New York and his new suit to other members of the neighborhood.

The sun was halfway gone, but the warm weather and excited ambience wouldn’t let anyone think about going home.

Sam hums approvingly in your hair as he places a kiss on it, “We’ll go soon.”

You really enjoyed the whole day, but now all you wanted was to go home and cuddle up in your blankets.

“Come on boys. Let’s go home, it’s late. Say Goodnight to Sam, Y/n and Bucky.”

Two hours later, Sarah was the first one to stand up, followed by AJ and Cass even though they didn’t seem too happy about it.

“Good Night Uncle Sam, Good Night Aunt Y/n, Good Night Uncle Bucky.”

From the corner of your eyes you saw Sam smiling at them and even Bucky smiled by them calling him uncle.

“Good Night boys.”

You yawned with a smile and watched them go.

“See you later at home.”

A few minutes later only Sam, Bucky and you were left.

“I think we should go too. She’s already sleeping.”

With closed eyes you heard Bucky standing up, the bench he was sitting on scratching over the wooden underground.

“Nahh she’s not. She’s just trying to make me do what she wants.”

For another time his body shakes as he giggled, gently lifting you up in his arms and starting to walk.

“He’s right Bucky.”

Loud enough for them both to hear you, you mumbled the words which made them both laugh.

“If so, you can walk on your own, can’t you?”

Sam attempts to put you back on your own feet, but you protest by groaning into his chest.

“Okay fine.”

He softly laughed again, and you opened your eyes a bit to look at him but closed them immediately as he looked down on you.

“Ah god damn it, we have to go back. Buck go home we’ll follow soon. I forgot my phone on the table.”

You felt how Sam turned around to go back and heard Bucky saying goodnight.

“Y/n you’re not as lightweight as you look.”

“Thanks for that, you’re not as charming as you pretend Wilson.”

You slapped his shoulder, eyes open again and narrowing at him.

“Also you’re a bad liar. Your phone is in your pocket. I can feel it.”

The last bit of daylight showed him smirking down on you while he let you sit on the table.

“But maybe I am romantic and wanted to spend a moment here with you alone.”

“Don’t go cheesy now. You just called me fat.”

With crossed arms and a pouting face you watch him groan but laughing while hiding his face.

“I didn’t, I just said-”

“Anyways. You could have told Bucky that you wanted to be alone with me. I think he would have left voluntary when we would have start making out.”

You giggled on his frown but stopped as he leaned down, his face a few inches away from yours.

“Y’know what. I’ll remember that for the next time.”

He gave your lips a peck, but you grabbed him by the shoulders before he could lean back.

Pressing your lips on his you heard a growl from him which made you smile into the kiss and deepened it by pulling him even closer.

“Y/n…” You bit his bottom lip to stop him from talking, but he was stronger than you and moved back, only this far to face you.

“It wasn’t my intention to make out.”

“C’mon Sam, if you want to be romantic it’s logical that I think that we’ll do more than just make out. Besides, its one of the rare places where we didn-”

“It’s really hard to be romantic if you’re not at the slightest.”

He wasn’t mad about you, the ankles of his mouth raised up a bit, and you could tell that he already thought about it as well.

“Then you have to try harder.”

He sighed as he watched the calm water around you, eyes switching back to you as you attempted to remove the sweater from your body.

“Y/n no.”

He grabbed your hands, holding them to stop you and bringing them onto his chest.

“I try to focus y/n. Please give me a moment.”

“Focus on what?”

With closed eyes another groan left his mouth at your question.

“I’m tryin’ to… damn this is harder than I thought.”

He cleared his throat before locking his eyes with yours again.

“Why is everybody saying it’s easier when you’re already there.”

He mumbled more to himself, making you start to worry a bit about him and brushed over his cheek to make him relax.

“Babe just say what you wanna say.”

“Sugar I’m tryin’. God damn it.”

He took a deep breath, whispering several curse words before speaking up again.

“Listen. You know me, I’m not that type of guy who makes big speeches. This in New York was different.” He rolled his eyes at your frowning, “Whatever. I’m not this romantic dude, you know that. What was the most romantic thing I’ve ever done?”

“Making me the best Mac n Cheese ever when I was sick last month?”

“That was a rhetorical question y/n.”

“Oh… but you’re romantic Sam. You may not notice but for me the good morning kisses and cuddles are very romantic.”

“Really? I just think it’s… it’s not romantic for me, I think, because you just deserve it.”

You blushed at his confession, “See that was romantic too.”

“Okay okay umm… Well I wanted to say that I love you. I mean I really love you. After all this shit I’ve gone through, we went through…. All the stress in the last weeks, Flag Smashers, Super Soldiers, John Walker.”

“Now that you mentioned Walker it’s not romantic anymore.”

For a brief moment he laughed, putting his hands in his pockets before pulling out a ring.

You gasped as you stared at it, eyes switching up and down from his hand to his eyes.

“Now that you are really destroying my efforts to make it a proper proposal, I’ll make it short.”

He attempted to kneel down, but you stopped him by holding onto his shoulders to support yourself as you stood up.

Your legs had become jelly and your whole body started to shake while tears built up in your eyes.

“Yes. Don’t you dare to ask me that cheesy ass question. I say yes.”

He wanted to groan again by your move to hide him from making it right, but his view became soft when he saw the first tears rolling down your cheeks.

“So you will mar- Ouch.” You slapped his shoulder which caused him to laugh, “Okay okay, we’re going to marry yes?”

“Yes we will.”

Already sobbing you took him into a kiss, softly moaning into his mouth as his lips moved smoothly on yours.

“Can I first put that ring on your finger before you spring onto me?”

With a blurry view you watched him slowly putting that finger on your shaky hand with the brightest smile you have ever seen.

“I love you so much Sam.”

“I love you too, sugar.”

Still with that bright smile on his face, he brushed away the tears on your cheeks. Pure love and admiration in his eyes by your whispered words.

“You’ll tell my sister. She will kill me if she finds out that I planned it all on my own.”

“Fine but first I’ll come back to the topic that we didn’t have sex before on this place.”

“You’re really a pain in the ass y/n.”

“The pain in the ass who is going to marry you dumbass.”

#Sam Wilson #Sam wilson x reader #sam wilson x you #sam wilson tfatws #tfatws spoilers #sam wilson x y/n #sam wilson fluff #sam wilson smut #mcu #marvel #marvel writer #request #captain america #captain america x reader

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unmaskedagain · 5 years ago

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Marinette Vs Santa

A quick Christmas drabble.

How did Marinette find out she was adopted? Well… her little half-brother tried to kill her.

Also, that’s how she found out her biological dad was Batman. Because… why not. As if her life wasn’t weird enough already.

And to think Marinette had been secretly writing Santa every year since she was three to like nine asking for a sibling of her own. She didn’t think it would ever happen

Then one day, on a cold December night, as Ladybug ran across rooftops to see as many of the Christmas decorations as possible. Suddenly every instinct she had told her to duck. And she did just narrowly avoided a sword to the throat.

Marinette readied herself to fight an Akuma, only to see an angry ten-year-old with a sword and a mask. He was dressed in green, red, and gold.

“Die, usurper!” He roared and attacked her again.

Ladybug dodged and jumped every attempt to kill her and tried to resist the urge to punch a child.

Eventually she got the better of the kid, and ended up hog tying him.

Marinette put her hands on her knees as she struggled to catch her breath, “Who. Are. You. Nightmare. Child?” She asked in between breaths. Ladybug picked up the fallen sword and pointed at him. “And what is your problem? What did I even do to you?”

“You are Marinette Dupain-Cheng, first born blood child of our father.” He hissed at her, “I am our father’s rightful heir; not you.”

Our father? Did her dad have a lovechild? Did he cheat on her mom? No, Tom Dupain would never.

“What?” Marinette pinched her nose. “You want to be head baker?”

“Fool!” He tsk’d at her. “I’ve no interest in your adoptive parents’ holdings. I will follow Father’s footsteps and rule the night. I will be Batman. Not you, sister. Kneel before me and renounce your heirship, and I will spare your life.”

…Wait Adoptive? Batman? Sister?

Marinette just stared at him. Not saying a word. For a while. Awhile he insulted her.

She looked out at the colorful lights that glowed against the freshly fallen snow and sense of peace that filled the air, and Marinette whispered the only thing on her mind…

“Fuck Santa.”

The boy stopped struggled and gave her a perplexed look, “What? What does the jolly fat man have to do with anything? Why has he made you angry, sister? I will avenge you.”

You just tried to kill me, she wanted to say.

Marinette just rolled her eyes, “Never mind. We need to talk.” She picked him and tossed him over her shoulder. “In my room.”

Running across Paris with a struggling kid on your shoulder and a sword in your hand wasn’t easy.

When she got to her room, she dropped the kid on her bed as gently as possible. “Do not escape,” She ordered. “If you do, do not destroy my room. I’m going to ask my parents if…” If they’re really her parents. Why didn’t they tell her? Why? Just Why? “What you say is true. I won’t mention Batman.”

Or the psychotic ten-year-old she had tied up in her room. Who may or may not be her brother.

Marinette de-transformed. Tikki hid in her hair before anyone could see her.

She came back to her room half an hour later with a cheese plate, full of veggies, fruits and crackers. And a tray full of chocolate chip Christmas cookies and two glasses of milk. She sat them down at the desk.

The boy glared at her.

“You were right,” Marinette sighed. “I was adopted. My birth mom was just nineteen when she had me. The sister of one of my mom’s friends.”

The news had been a blow. Her parents had kept repeating how much they loved her and how they had been planning on telling her when she was older. Older than fourteen. They wanted to know how she found out. She said her little brother had gotten in contact with her.

Marinette eyed the still tied up boy… her brother. He no longer struggled against his bonds, just stared with an angry expression on his face. “I don’t want to be Batman,” She told him. “The title is all yours. I like being Ladybug. It’s a name I earned, worked hard for. A name I’m proud of and will not part with easily. Is that something you can understand?”

He stared at her for a moment before nodding slowly, “You created your own hero persona to find the terror entrapping your city; all by yourself. …Father did the same.”

He said the last part with a sad tone that Marinette’s new found big sisterly instincts go haywire. “And you think just because you’re his… partner,” She said, instead of sidekick because she was sure that word would get her killed. “And not a solo hero, that he will find you unworthy of being his heir.” Marinette sat down next to him, and patted his hair softly. “Did you ever think that because he is the one who’s training you, that because you fight by his side, that he’d trust you more? Trust you to take up his mantle in the way he can’t trust me. He doesn’t know what I’m capable of entirely. But he knows exactly what you can do because he taught you.”

Her brother scoffed but his face lost some of its anger and he seemed to relax.

“I’m going to untie you now,” She told him. “Do not attack me.”

When he was untied and given back his sword, which he sheathed, Marinette brought over the food. “You know my name,” She said after he took a bite a cookie and seemed pleased with it. “What’s yours?”

“Damian,” He answered. “Damian Al-Ghul Wayne. How did you obtained magical powers? And what is the creature that thought it could hide from me?”

Marinette just blink. Because Dammit Tikki. The pink ball of fluff out with a chastised look on her face. Unfortunately that look meant nothing as all the other Kwami Marinette now protected as Guardian thought that meant they could come out to.

Plagg straight to Damian and sat on his lap, “Cheese. Now.”

Marinette face-palmed. The Kwami had taken trying to declare dominance ever since Ladybug took the ring back from Chat Noir.

Damian could only stare at the being, animal, and sprite as he reached slowly for a piece of cheese from the selection of food and handed it the small creature. That was all the other Kwami needed to rush to him for attention. Damian was easily mesmerized by the little creatures and saw no issue in showing them affection. Apart from the fact that Oracle, and Father, and thus the rest of the family were watching the feed, through the mask, while they attempt to locate him. Damian could only disable their trackers for so long. Annoying as she was, Oracle was a genius.

“Okay, little brother,” Marinette shrugged. “You tell me your story. I’ll tell you mine.”

And so they did. The two siblings spent the next few hours telling the other all about their history. Neither were happy.

Marinette was beyond furious that her little brother was raised by ruthless assassins, cast into the role of Robin (though mostly by his own doing), constantly risked his life, and had little no childhood.

Damian was pissed, which was putting it nicely. His beloved sister had no training when she was charged with the task of defending the city as the hero Ladybug and fight a supernatural terrorist, dealt with sexual harassment from her once trusted partner, then her master died in battle but not before he bestowed one of the most powerful magical artifacts of all time to a teenager. To top it all off, his sweet sister was being bullied by a pathological liar who turned all her friends against her, nearly got her expelled, leaving her with little to no Allies to aid her in her fight against evil. Marinette had cried at the end of her tale.

…He was going burn Paris to the ground.

Little did he know, the Batfamily found it hard not to agree as they watched the livestream from the Batplane?

Dick had gone from jumping up and down at the sight of his adorable new sister, Marinette. She was a hero called Ladybug, how cute was that? To being rather angry at what she had to put up with. It was too much pressure for a kid, superhero, superpowers, or not.

“What do we do?” Tim asked.

Batman was still having trouble processing. He had another daughter; a beautiful little girl who seemed to have taken after him without ever having known the man. Nature versus Nurture, he supposed; nature won. Marinette who had been fighting to save her city like he fought to save his. Who was her mother? Why didn’t she tell Bruce he had another child? Granted Brucie wasn’t who most people thought would be an ideal father but still… Hadn’t he proved himself?

“Find Hawkmoth,” Jason growled. “Punch a hole through his face. And Send Steph and Cass to have a “Talk”, he air quoted. “With that Lila chick. While we have a little talk of our own with Chat Noir. End of story.”

Cass nodded, gleefully, that little girl would pay for what she did to Cassandra’s sister. And if she was lucky, Lila would even live to tell the tale.

Stephanie was wondering if the Batfamily, her sort of-adopted family, could really get away with murder.

…Who was she kidding? They totally could.

“We don’t… kill?” Batman said as he turned around and stalked away. “I’ll inform Alfred of the development.” Maybe have him prepare a room, he thought with hope. He’d like his daughter to visit and feel at home whenever she could.

When Batman left the area, Tim looked around at his siblings, “Did that sound like a question to anyone else?”

Marinette and Damian fell asleep next to each other, with the Kwami cuddled close. The next morning she woke not only to sound to the sound of the Kwami but to the sight of five additional vigilantes heroes, in addition to the one from the night before, hovering around her room.

Two girls who were discussing with Trixx and long about their abilities. A hero in mostly black and red, who sat on Marinette’s top bunk with Marinette’s laptop on his lap, and Pollen on his shoulder. Damian still had Plagg with him, which Marinette wanted to tsk at because she told him not to play favorites. A blue, clearly the oldest, was laying on the floor playing with the remaining Kwami like they were puppies.

She sat up in her bed and tried to wipe the sleep from her eyes. She glared at Damian, “Want to explain?”

“Mornin, sunshine,” A guy in a redmask said, with Barkk on his shoulder, as he chopped on a leftover cookie, not noticing the way Tikki glared at him. “Name’s Red Hood. Real name Jason. Dad’s downstairs talking to your parents.”

Dad?

She glared even harder at Damian. He shrugged, “Marinette, these are our… brothers and sisters.” He said. “They were adopted.”

“You should get better security on your computer,” The hero on her bed said. “Name’s Tim. I go by Red Robin.”

“Cassandra,” One the girl introduced. “Blackbat.”

“Stephanie. Batgirl,” The other said.

“I’m Dick!” The one on the floor laughed. “Nightwing. Welcome to the family.”

Tim continued, “I’ve located all personal information on Lila Rossi. I believe we can now move forward with the plan.”

Jason clapped his hands together, “Awesome. Operation: Get That Bitch is a go.”

Marinette just started at them. Six. She had six siblings. One for every year ever asked for a sibling for Christmas. She just had one thing to say as she tossed the covers back over her head to hide from the world…

“Fuck. Santa.”

Finding out Bruce Wayne, cough Batman cough, was her father was one thing. Meeting him in person was another. He stared at her with cool blue eyes that made Marinette realize she probably should’ve questioned where she got her own long before.

Her parents had been surprised when Bruce Wayne walked into their bakery and asked to speak with them alone. Even more so, when he claimed to be the biological father of their daughter. It had been long conversation between the three. But Bruce made it clear that he had interest of just taking Marinette from them. However, he would like visitations and for her to spend time with him over the summers. And to take her out for the day so she could meet her siblings. Also, about adding Wayne to her last name.

So that was how Marinette found herself sitting in one of the most expensive restaurants in all of Paris, in the best dress she ever designed herself, with her… family.

The initial awkwardness was broken up by all her siblings. Though they seemed to know to how to behave in public, they had no problems messing with each other and teasing.

“How long have you been into fashion, Marinette?” Bruce, her Papa, (As her dad would always be her dad).

She smiled, “Since I was really little. It’s my dream to have my own line.”

Bruce’s eyes got bright at the chance to help his daughter, “I can help you with that. I can drum up a connect or two, to get you started.”

“He’ll throw money at it until someone cracks,” Jason translated which cause Marinette to laugh and Bruce to glare.

Marinette discovered Damian had snuck Plagg with him to the restaurant.

Marinette just groaned.

“You brought Tikki!” Damian defended.

“I’m the holder of her Miraculous,” She hissed back as low as she could. “Paris’s main and sometimes only hero. I need her.”

Damian huffed, “That’s no reason he shouldn’t be allowed to attend as well. He’s with me.”

Before Marinette could continue the arugment…

“Wayne?” Gabriel Agreste asked, tailed by Natalie, Adrien, Chloe, and Chloe’s parents: Audrey Bourgeois and André Bourgeois. “Bruce Wayne?”

Bruce put on his most charming smile as he stood up, “Yes and you are?” He put out his hand.

Gabriel shook it, clearly wondering why the billionaire was there. “Gabriel Agreste.”

Bruce nodded, “The fashion designer.”

“This is my son Adrien,” Gabriel introduced. “My assistant Nathalie. My longtime friend Audrey Bourgeois, of the Style Queen, and André Bourgeois, mayor of Paris, and their lovely daughter. We’re here for a quick lunch.”

“Same,,” Bruce nodded. “I’m here with my children. My eldest Dick, followed by Jason, Cassandra, Stephanie, Tim, Marinette and my youngest Damian.” He introduced them.

At the sound her name, all the newcomers eyes went to Marinette. She gave them a small wave, “Good to see you again.”

“Dupain-Cheng!” Chloe gasped.

Damian growled, “Dupain-Cheng-Wayne.” As he glared passed her at the blond boy, the former Chat Noir.

The blond girl was stunned, “How could you not tell me?”

Hadn’t the two moved passed their difference and become friends? The two girls, and Kagami and united together when the liar seemed to take hold of the rest of the class.

“No one knew,” Marinette defended. I didn’t even know, she wanted to add. But they had discussed and agreed on the story that Bruce and an unknown woman gave up Marinette to the Dupain-Chengs when she was born. Nothing scandalous about it.

Gabriel paused as he tried to think of what to say. How did he not know there was Wayne living in Paris, that his son was classmates with a Wayne. The girl had power in her pinky when she was still in Nappies, then either of the older Bourgeois had currently in their entire bodies. She would’ve been a much better playmate for his son than Chloe; the vapid, girl that she was.

Audrey was thinking nearly the same thing. “Such a brilliant daughter you have, Brucie,” She smoozed. “I still can’t believe she turned down the internship I offered her. I want her to come to New York with me, you know?”

Bruce beamed, “I’m glad someone sees her brilliance.”

This went on for a while as each of the parents tried their hands at flattering the billionaire. Bruce finally had enough and all but dismissed them

“I’m glad our children our such good friends,” Gabriel said finally as he turned to leave.

Marinette fought he urge to scoff. Adrien was not her friend.

The boy in question looked anywhere but at Marinette as he left. He had chosen to side with the other students when the Ice’d out Marinette until the girl stopped being a bully and being mean to Lila. Even if he knew it wasn’t true. Most declared they weren’t her friends anymore. Alya said she’d never be friends with Marinette again.

Coward, Damian nearly hissed. When they were gone, he turned to Marinette, “The blond girl is your alley, correct?” He asked. “Your Queen?”

Marinette nodded, “There’s Luka and Kagami as well.”

“I will test to ensure they are worthy to fight at her side,” He declared.

The others nodded. Bruce got a dark look on his face, “We all will.” He would not allow his daughter to suffer another Chat Noir.

That was it, Marinette thought as she threw down the sliver napkin, she was starting to hate Christmas.

The end of the weekend the entire world knew that Marinette was Bruce Wayne’s daughter. This made going to school Monday morning a huge spectacle as paparazzi crowded the outside the bakery and outside the school. Each one trying to get the attention of Wayne’s crown jewel, new Princess of Gotham, as the media dubbed her.

Suffice to say, Bruce had taken her to school that day flagged by Dick and Tim as her other siblings combed the city for traces of Hawkmoth.

The principle had practically fallen over himself to speak with the Bruce Wayne. But quickly hid in the shadows, when the first thing Bruce said to him was, “Ah, yes, you’re the man who expelled my daughter without a proper investigation. I’ll be talking to you later. So will my lawyers.”

Marinette tried to hide her blushing face her father walked her to class. Students did everything they could to get a look at her. Chloe and Kagami waited outside her classroom, that was practically bursting with noise.

However She practically drop dead when Tim complimented Kagami’s sword fighting skill and offered to duel her, and Kagami blushed. Blushed. Kagami?

Marinette shook her head as she kissed her father and brothers goodbye. This world just didn’t make sense anymore.

The two other girls flanked Marinette’s side as they walked into class. All noise stopped instantly. Marinette didn’t even bother spare the other kids a glance as the three took a seat in back of the class.

Chloe quickly pulled her into a conversation of the places she’d see that summer in New York.

“I’ll be spending the end of Christmas break in Gotham too,” Marinette said shyly. “I’ll open my presents there. Papa wants me there for the Wayne Ball was I can be properly introduced to society.”

And not because Bruce Wayne was scared of what Alfred would do if he didn’t get to mean his new granddaughter before the new year. That and Martha Kent were the ultimate overprotective grandparents.

“A Ball?” Lila squeaked, poorly concealed jealously on her face. She still couldn’t believe the little twit was Wayne. IF she had, Lila would’ve been a hell of a lot nicer. No wonder Marientte always knew when Lila was lying. She probably knew the celebrities through her father. “You’re going to the Waynes’ Annual New Year’s Ball.”

“Everyone goes,” Rose awe’d. “It’s basically a red carpet event. I watch every year. And Selena Gomez had the most beautiful dress on last time.”

Juleka hummed in agreement, “Clara Nightingale looked like a princess.”

Marinette just shrugged as each of her classmates offered their input on what the Ball would be like. She wasn’t about to make nice with them. They had turned their backs on her, betrayed her trust. Her brothers and sisters had warned her to be watchful for phony friends.

Alya, who’s face had been turning steadily more red, as the classmates speculated who Marinette would meet. “Girl!” She burst. “How could not tell me?”

Marinette raised a thin eyebrow, “We’re not friends, Alya, by your own declaration. I don’t believe I have to tell you anything. And even when we were friends, I only knew you for two years. Why would I tell a journalist anything important about me?”

“She was right not to,” Kagami stated, “With how quickly you all turned on her, I’m surprised she ever told you anything at all.”

Alya flinched back as if slapped. So did a few other students.

“It’s not fair,” Alya continued as if nothing happened. “I could’ve gotten so many interviews. OH! I could with you to the Ball. It’ll be bomb.”

The three girls in the backrow just stared at her.

“We. Are. Not. Friends,” Marinette repeated slowly. “Kagami and Chloe, and their families are invited because Kagami. And. Chloe. Are. My. Friends. In fact, my only friends in class. Luka is invited as well as well as his family,” She turned to Juleka who turned bright red. “Luka will receive invite tonight. If you attend with him, I will do my best to be polite. My father allowed me to invite them so I would have additional company if it gets too busy. The Ball is invitation only.”

Allowed? He insisted. Marinette doesn’t even know how he found out all their names and who their families were. For reason, Marinette had the gut instinct to blame a redhead and Tim. Batman wanted to test his daughter’s team. And if they were lacking… Well, he’d promised to shape them up. Or else.

“I’m going to the Wayne Ball!” Chloe shouted. “And you didn’t tell me. It’s mere weeks away. I need a dress. I need to tell Mother.”

Kagami had frozen. She knew well that the Wayne Ball wasn’t just any high society event. It was the High society event. Her family had never been elite and rich enough to receive an invitation. “I thank you for the invitation,” She bowed her head. “It will be a pleasure to attend.” She paused as she pulled out her phone and stood up. “I must also tell Mother.” And with, she quickly left the room.

Which was much more polite than Chloe who called her mom then and there.

“Mama!” Chloe sang, “Marinette invited us to the Wayne Ball this year!”

“WHAT!” Was heard from the receiver.

Marinette giggled. She ignored the glare Alya sent her.

Rose grasped Juleka’s arm and jumped up and down. “You’re going to the ball. Ahhhh!” She screamed. “What will you wear? Your hair? You have to take pictures.” Rose suddenly reared back and took a deep breath. “You’re going to walk the red carpet.”

“You know, Marinette,” Lila smiled sweetly. “I would be honored to help you navigate the world of a celebrity. The ball will be so stressful. If you needed me there, I’d be happy to attend.”

“No, thank you,” Marinette said. “My siblings have promised to guide me through. It will be a bonding experience.”

Lila forced a smile on her face, “Of course.” She fought the desire to scream and throw a tantrum. How could this happen?

Adrien on the other hand fought to keep the smile on his face. His father would not be pleased. He had instructed Adrien to get close to Marinette, and thus the Wayne family. Adrien hadn’t had the courage to tell his father that they weren’t friends anymore. And that because of the lack of friendship, the Agreste were not invited to the party of the year.

Marinette went to bed that day with a smile on her face. The Christmas season may have started off rocky but it would get better.

Suddenly her phone started buzzing like it was on fire.

The first text she read was from Chloe: You’re dating Roy Queen?!!!!

Marinette’s entirely body froze. Who?

Suddenly, she got another text… From Jason: Hey Baby Bats, I need a favor! Can you fake date my friend Roy. I already told everyone you guys were a thing. Bruce is freaking out! Thanks! Love you.

Her mouth dropped, raged filled her entire body. And then she remembered how she joked with Alya that she wanted a boyfriend last year for Christmas last year.

“FUCK SANTA!”

#ml salt #batfamily #Marinette deserves better #Marienette Dupain Cheng #bruce #bruce wayne #damian wayne #alya salt

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myblueeyedbuggers · 4 years ago

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My Boys

Chapter 11

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14

Pairings: Steve Rogers X Reader (Best Friend) Bucky Barnes X Reader

Word Count: 1531

Warnings: Language, Bullying Themes

Summary: After being abandoned by her parents in Brooklyn in 1929, y/n makes a living for herself by working for the Црни лабуд gang until she meets two boys in a back alley and her life slowing begins to change.

Eyup my Loves! so it’s been a while since I last added to the story, I tried my best to keep my writing similar to my previous chapters, let me know what you all think! any advice or constructive criticism is welcome :) I’ll shush now, enjoy!

(This is what I Imagine Annetta to look like :) )

So, in case you were all wondering, the day didn’t get any better. I mean I kinda knew that kids my age could be massive A holes to each other, but I didn’t really expect to see it literally the flipping second I ‘walked’ through the doors. And by walked I mean dragged by the duo known as my own personal demons, or Steve and Bucky to the rest of the population. A crowd of kids were all gathered around a row of lockers, loads of the shitheads were cheering and encouraging whatever the hell was goin’ on, and as I was about to find out it wasn’t a surprise performance by Frank Sinatra. Safe to say that was a bigger disappointment that diet coke. Anyway, what was I saying ? oh yeah, stood at the front of the crowd were a bunch of lasses that couldn’t of been older than 16, in their hands was a bunch of eggs and flour. At the bottom of their feet, on the floor, was a kid around the same age as me, her glasses were snapped in half and the bottom of to shirt was ripped, but what disgusted me the most was the fact she was begging for help as these girls smashed egg after egg into her face. You know how bulls lose their shit when they see somethin’ red? Yeah imagine that but 10x worse, the lads didn’t have time to stop me as I tore through the crowd ready to beat the ever-loving shit outta these pricks.

“‘OI! WHAT THE ACTUAL SHIT ARE YOU DOIN’” the crowd fell silent as the girls turned to me with what one can only assume was supposed to be a ‘threatening’ glare, if I’m being completely honest it looked like they’d all simultaneously crapped em self’s. One of the girls stepped forwards, she was only a tad taller than me, her hair was a bright red, her green eyes were narrowed at me like she couldn’t believe someone was actually talking back to her. I think this is the part where I yell surprise right ? no? okay then. “Not that I care, but who the hell do you think you are? You got any idea who I am?” she sneered at me, oh my god! I’ve found someone with a bigger ego than Bucky. How in the hell is that possible. “well from first glance I’da said Santa Clause’s ex-wife but I reckon he’d have a better taste in girls now I’ve seen you up close”. And que the outraged gasps from her minions in 3,2,1…. I could hear a few people laughin’ and if I weren’t mistaken a very loud “Oh Jesus wept” from barney boy. Oooh yeah that’s when I know I’m doing my job right.

“YOU BITCH!” she screamed at me, her grubby little hands started swinging towards me in such an exaggerated way it was almost funny, I mean come on anyone coulda seen that comin’ from a mile off. And like the genius I am, I literally just side stepped her as she lunged forward, an’ from the look on her face she weren’t expecting that, it was like the world slowed down as she surged forward unable to stop herself. Well that was till she landed head -first in the bin. I’d be a big fat liar if I said I wasn’t on the floor dying from laughter. Her legs were flailing above her head as she struggled to pull herself outta there, her cronies tried to help by grabbing her legs but that ended with one of em sporting one heck of a shiner on her right eye. A small sniffle pulled my attention away from the rather hilarious sight, glancing behind me I saw the young lass still on the ground, holdin’ her glasses which were in half with tears rolling down her cheeks. “hey, it’s okay now, they’ve gone. Here take my hand, lets get ya cleaned up eh? Reckon they’re be a bathroom round here somewhere”. The lass didn’t say anything to me, only looking at me with apprehension before taking my outstretched hand and leading us to the bathroom, the sound of the crowd growing quieter as we moved further away from it. “Thanks for saving me from Monica, she’s been bullying me since we were 11, nobody’s ever stood up for me before.” Her voice was so quiet, it shook from the effort it took her to hold back her tears, and I admired her strength, not a lotta girls woulda gone this long and not tell a teacher. “Don’t worry about it mate, I’m sorry it took so long for someone to defend ya, my names y/n by the way, don’t think we’ve met” her brown eyes met mine, as a small smile spread across her face, I couldn’t really tell what colour her hair was but I’m guessing it’s a shade a brown, other than that she looked like a completely normal person. “My names Annetta, you’re right we ain’t met yet but I’m glad we did”.

-Later that day

It took us ‘bout 30 minutes to get all the egg off Annetta, best we could do was wash it off and cover up the stains with the cardigan I leant her, but what really put the icing on the cake was the teacher in period 1 yellin’ at us for being so late. The temptation to yeet my shoe at someone had never been as strong as it was in that moment, fortunately for the overgrown turnip of a teacher I had to settle for a mean ass side eye. And man was it a mean one.

Apart from that the day had gone by with no more incidents, well unless you count me chasing Bucky round the canteen with a carton of milk for stealin’ half my lunch, much to Annetta’s entertainment and Steve’s embarrassment. I mean the butthole deserved it, nobody and I mean NOBODY messes with my lunch. Even blue-eyed boys with a smile that could charm the devil….what am I sayin’?!

ANYWAYS it’s now what? 4th period I think, which meant English with Annetta, and maybe my favourite boys in the world. Shakespeare and Charles Dickens. Bet ya thought I were gonna say Steve and Bucky right? Well they’re currently sat behind me debating who’d win in a fight, Popeye, or Bugs Bunny. I’m surrounded by idiots. Thankfully, the teacher walked into the classroom and saved me, Mrs Davis seemed like a nice woman, she had a friendly smile and roundish face, her hair tied back into a neat bun as she took a seat. Now I’ll save you the boring bits, she started the lesson with a pop quiz which was just plain rude, about halfway through it the door burst open and there stood my best friend in the entire world. Monica. I have to say I loved her new style, the schools P.E kit really brought out the judgement in her eyes, did you detect my sarcasm yet?.

You wanna know what made her entrance even more dramatic ? the lovely aroma of gone off milk and rotted banana skins that followed her around the room, I could help the smirk on my face as everyone around me started gagging at the smell. If you ask me I reckon it’s an improvement, I mean she certainly captures the attention of everyone in the room. Monica’s face started to match her hair, quickly racing over to Mrs Davis to give her the tardy slip before taking her seat which just had to be across from me, whoopee for me. Eventually Mrs Davis got the attention back to her, carrying on with her lesson, which moved onto matching up the famous English literature quotes with the character and book. To be fair this was actually a load of fun for me, even if Steve butchered a line from Romeo and Juliet, I don’t remember Shakespeare saying, ‘ A rose by any other name would smell as bad’. The way I banged my head on the table made Annetta think I broke my neck. Fun times people.

Of course, my reaction didn’t escape Mrs Davis’s attention, just my luck eh?. “Miss y/n, seeing as you seem to know everything, answer me this. Elizabeth Bennet is a main character in a well-known book, she’s known for the quote ‘I am a no bird and no net ensnares me. I am a free human being with an independent will’. The question is who is the author of this book is it A) Charles Dickens B) Jane Austen or C) Arthur Conan Doyle ?”. Is she being for real right now?. “Miss? With no disrespect the question itself is wrong, that wasn’t said by Elizabeth Bennet from pride and Prejudice, but said by Jane Eyre, and it was written by Charlotte Brontë”. A small smile spread across her face, which was confusing as all heck and a tad creepy to be honest, “very well-done Miss y/n, that’s the first time a student has gotten that question correct.”……

What in the name of ever-loving fluff just happened?….

So our girl is back and kicking butt! hopefully it’s not as bad as I think it is, and again I want to thank you all again for being so patient with me, good news is I’ve got the rest of the book written already! I’ll be posting them at least once a week.

Lots of love,

Rose xxx

#winter soldier x reader #winter soldier #captain america x reader #captain america #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #mcu #fanfic #reader #reader insert #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader

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angelbaugh-writes · 5 years ago

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My Almost Soulmate {Steve Rogers x Reader}

Request: Can I ask for 5 with steeb rogers?

Warnings: endgame spoilers (just in case you haven’t seen it), heartbreak at the end

Author’s Note: Thank you for the request, sunshine! Fun Fact, this dialogue prompt is a line from a poem I wrote. (Another fun fact: One part of this deleted itself twice! So I had to write the date section a total of three times. I think I have it memorized!) I hope you like it. Much love Xox Angel Baugh

I was madly in love with Steve Rogers. It was love at first sight; at least it was for me. If soulmates existed, I believed with my whole being that he was mine.

We first met at the tower. Tony had hired me as an assistant, and was introducing me to the team. I had excused myself to the restroom when Steve arrived. When I entered back into the room, I quite literally ran into the blond super-soldier.

“Oh my gosh. I am so sorry,” I stumbled over my words as I apologized profusely. “Are you okay?” A deep laugh brought my gaze up to the prettiest face I’d ever laid eyes on. I’m sure he heard the squeak that left my mouth.

“It’s okay, doll. I should have looked where I was going.” Oh god. Did he just call me doll?

“Fuck me.” I couldn’t keep the words in. My face began to heat up as the embarrassment washed over me. His smirk sent butterflies fluttering in my stomach.

“Y/N! You met the old man, I see,” Tony spoke as he found us, “What did I miss?” You stared at Steve, wide-eyed and silently begging him to keep his mouth shut. He sent me a wink that caused me to groan inwardly.

“Y/N just ran into me, but it’s no big deal. She apologized to make up for it.”

I must have left a lasting impression on the poor guy, because I had managed to seduce him into asking me on a date. That was the first time I’d ever seen Steve flustered. A light dusting of pink covered his cheeks. I had, of course, said yes. How could I say no to Captain America?

The date started at a nice restaurant. We passed banter back and forth as we ate. Steve told me about his childhood. Sure, I had learned about him in History class, but it was so much more interesting learning it from him. We shared embarrassing stories as we walked to the movie theater. I couldn’t remember the name of the film to save my life, but I do remember practically jumping into his lap when a scary scene played on the large screen.

“I had a really good time tonight,” Steve spoke as he walked me to my front door. I held my cardigan in my hands. He stuffed his hands in his pockets nervously. “I’d love to do it again sometime soon.”

“Maybe we could meet up for some coffee one morning this week,” I suggested, biting my lip. The small action claimed his attention. He licked his lips as his gaze drifted to mine.

“That-That sounds perfect,” he mumbled. A few moments passed before he finally asked the question I’d been waiting to hear. “Can I kiss you?”

A nod was all it took for him to connect our lips. His hands cupped my cheeks while my arms wrapped around his waist. The cool night air nipped at our faces. Sparks shot through my spine at his touch. We pulled away flustered.

“I’ll see you at the tower tomorrow,” I whispered, seemingly dazed. He grinned at me. “Goodnight, Steve.”

“Goodnight, darling. I’ll see you then.” One quick peck on the cheek and we parted to go our separate ways.

Our relationship started slowly. After three more dates, I asked Steve to be my boyfriend. We became closer together as weeks and then months passed. We moved in together after a year together. The house was small but still big enough for us. Soon after that purchase, we got a dog. The irish setter was our child. Sam came over more often than he was invited to play with the dog. He spent many nights in our guest room. We got engaged after three years of being together.

My phone rang as I talked with Pepper. The team was due to arrive from a mission that day and we waited for our boys together.

Tony didn’t give me time to talk when I answered the call, “Hey, kid. We just landed. Your old man got hit and he’s not doing too good. He’s going to be okay. Meet us at the med bay.” He hung up without waiting for a response. I looked at Pepper.

“They’re home,” I croaked out, “but Steve’s hurt.”

When I entered the room, Steve was laying down with an IV hooked up to him. His face looked as if it had been drained of color. Tears pricked my eyes as I sat next to him.

“Oh. Hi, Y/N. I missed you.” His lazy smile brought a quiet chuckle out of me. “I got a boo-boo.”

“I see,” I sniffled. “I thought you were supposed to be invincible to this kind of stuff?”

“I am! But the bad guys got the good stuff. But don’t you worry, I beat them up real good!” His words slurred together as he spoke. The medicine being given to him was causing him to become delirious.

“I’m proud of you, babe,” I grabbed his hand in mine and kissed his knuckles gently.

“Why are you crying? Don’t cry, my love. How am I supposed to propose to you tonight if you are sad?” I halted my actions at his words.

His head lolled to the side before shooting back up. He had sobered up just enough to realize what he had said. I knew this was coming, Bucky is a terrible liar, but I hadn’t expected it to happen so soon.

“Oops. I didn’t mean to say that. Unless you’re okay with that. Will you marry me, Y/N? This is really bad timing, but I’m so madly in love with you. You’re amazing. You’re so smart and talented and pretty. Not to mention your fat a-” I cut off his rambling with a kiss.

“I’d love to marry you.”

The wedding was simple. The team were the only people invited. No best-man was appointed, due to Bucky and Sam’s subtle rivalry, and I had no maid of honor. It was perfect for us. We were perfect together.

I wish I could say that things ended with a Happy Ever After, but it didn’t. The war against Thanos ended with Tony’s funeral. It was easily the hardest day of my life. After the service ended, Steve had to jump back in time to return the stones. He left. He left to finish saving the world for the last time.

The last thing I expected was for him to stay. He was given the chance to stay with her and he took it. He chose Peggy over me. I came second to him in those fleeting moments. In the long run, I meant nothing to him. Just a stepping stone in the path back to her. Everything had been a lie.

He was my almost soulmate.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #Steve Rogers #captain america x reader #captain america #tony stark #Iron Man #Bucky Barnes #sam wilson #marvel #Avengers #The Avengers

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black-rose-writings · 4 years ago

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Rose watches Fate: The Winx Saga

Episode 1: How bad can it be?

I have not seen any reviews of the actual show, though I have come across some (not favorable ones) and watched the trailer, which left me with “that’s not good” vibes.

SPOILERS, obviously.

I’m gonna regret this so much.

Shit, I forgot it’s a Netflix adaptation.

Horror atmosphere? Okay.

Farmer cursing out sheep? Am I watching the right show?

Whooo, spooky magic portal.

Sheep gore? Ehm, alright.

What’s that, a werewolf?

Yep, it’s Winx. Starting out with a guy getting bloodily murdered off-screen by a werewolf. I’m disappointed and we’re only at the title card.

What’s that music? Not bad, but I’m not a big fan, either.

Oh, look, fat white Not-Flora, selling flowers to some bald dude in front of the school.

Aisha with braids. Yeah, I’m not mad at her, yet.

Stella looks like she’s thirty.

So does Musa. She looks bored. That doesn’t bode well.

Is that fuckboy Sky? I’m giving him a chance - but only one.

Was Bloom loking at him? Was that supposed to be disgust?

Wow, Sky, who wrote your dialog? On that note, who wrote Stella’s text?

Also... that’s one shitty way to insert yourself there, buddy. Was that supposed to sound smart?

Aaand patronizing. Nice. I’m losing respect quickly. And, if she’s gonna end up with you at the end, I’m gonna barf.

Nervous laughter, yay. WE GET IT, SHE’S NEW TO THE WHOLE FAIRY THING.

Not a fan of the word mansplaining being used unironically, but honestly, you go girl.

“Quit perving on the first years”, I’m with you on that, though I’m pretty sure that’s not a phrasing people would use. Also, who’s that? Riven? Brandon? I don’t remember the guy’s casting, they all looked way too similar.

Stella with British accent is... okay, I guess. Not a fan. Also... she looks way too old and way too fancy for this.

Also... had Bloom and Stella never met before? How did they get in contact? How did Bloom find out about magic? I have so many questions.

So, the Not-Faragonda gave her a Hogwarts letter. Okay.

Stella’s ring is like the first thing about this that I actually kinda like.

Oh, never mind. Not “Sword of Solaria” - “Gateway ring”. And Stella hates being at Alfea. Oh, wow, so quirky.

Only 7 realms? Wow, they really shrunk the Magical Dimension down. I mean, I get why, but they could have left it vague.

Yes, yes, you desperately want to be Harry Potter, like everyone else for the last 20 years.

“The transformation magic has been lost” - I was disappointed already, but somehow, it got worse.

Cool, Tinkerbell was real and Not-Faragonda already knows, what kind of magic Bloom has. I mean, they said three months ago, so I guess that makes sense, but still.

Ooh, foreshadowing. She burned her house down, didn’t she?

“Magic can be dangerous, as you well know” - yep, definitelly burned her house down. Probably killed someone in the process.

"Trust the process” - so, is Not-Faragonda gonna be the villain?

“I’m here because you promised you can teach me control.“ “No, you’re here, because you had no other choice.“ Bloom definitelly killed her parents. And I’m getting major creeps from Faragonda.

That school looks like the X-Men amnsion. Am I the only one seeing that? Is this gonna be wanna-be X-Men?

Facetiming her parents, as you do. Nevermind, she didn’t kill them. Maybe someone else?

Jeez, girl, no need to be so judgy.

“Lady of the Flies, sweetie, don’t be sexist“ - I get the California stereotype, but that was very, very unnecessary.

Oh, they don’t know she’s in a magic school. Okay.

Not-Faragonda is a liar, get it.

And here come the Harry Potter references.

Can you tone the references down? Also, they have Harry Potter and Lord of the Flies in the Not-Magix. (And yes, I’m gonna be doing the “not” thing a lot.

Oh, they assigned Stella to Bloom. That’s disappointing.

And Not-Flora is quirky and can’t shut up. Okay. This girl is looking more and more as the exact opposite of Flora.

Stella was held a year, just like in the original show, calling it now.

“I have a cousin named Flora” - namedropping her doesn’t earn you forgiveness, lady.

Oh, yeah, Musa has mind powers, I forgot that one. Great.

Yay, big badasses, kicking each other in a dirty pond, how cool...

“She’s a ginge, they’re all nuts“, okay. “Amazing shags, though.“ Ehm, excuse me, what? I get that we’re all adult here, but like... I appretiated the virgin joke there, Sky. Not funny, but appreciated.

Is that supposed to be Codatorta? Is Alfea a bootcamp, now?

“Burned Ones“, huh? So, that’s the werewolf, thing? Okay, we have a big evil, now.

Whoa, zombies. And a traumatized drill sergant. Nice.

Is Sky smoking? Cause if so, I have no more respect for him.

Okay, who’s Rosalind? Bloom’s mom? (Please, no spoilers)

Not-Faragonda denying reality, as expected.

Oh, the bald guy is Not-Flora’s dad. Okay.

Oh, look, the... wanna-be evil fairy? Definitelly and “arsehole”, as she says.

What a polite way to say “Fuck off”.

Calling her mum a basic bitch is... very classy. You’re very quirky, very relatable and not like the other girls, we get it.

Are Stella and Sky dating? I know that’s gonna cause drama and I hate that already.

The hell is that? A fire Patronus?

So, what did she burn, exacly?

She looks so happy at the baby flame.

She’s got that evil look down.

And now she can’t stop. Shocker.

Bloom is quirky and doesn’t like her mom. That’s... the exact opposite of the relationship they had in the show.

And I hate that character assasination of Vanessa. What the hell? Why can’t a female lead have an awesome relationship with her mom who loves her? Why is Mike such a doormat? I fucking hate this show and I’m 30 minutes in.

I was close. She almost killed her parents.

Yep, definitely a changeling. I was gonna write it here, but I forgot to pause and she said it before I did.

“Someone’s been lying to her” - shot at Not-Faragonda with creepy music in the background. Yep, bad guy, through and through.

Seeecret tunnel. Seeecret tunnel.

Is Not-Faragonda wearing sweatpants? I mean, that’s her choice, it just seems odd.

Yeah, bitch, strangle the dudebro, he deserves it.

I have just realized I can’t tell Riven and Sky appart. I’m not sure, if that’s saying something about me or the show.

Ooh, drama, what did Sky do? I don’t want to know, cause my respect for him is already at zero and I’d hate to hate the obvious love interest.

Ooh, she left the door open.

She’s supposed to be 16. The only one I’m buying being 16 for a second is Flora. The others, hell no. I kinda hoped they had aged them up, but no, 16 it is.

Secret hideout, nice.

Is that Daphne? Nope, that’s a fire zombie.

*insert every horror trope ever*

Fire zombie steals the ring, cool.

Oh, look, Not-Faragonda comes to save the day, yay...

“Where’s Stella?“ Getting laid, apparently.

Silva? Is that the Not-Codatorta? Okay.

Oh, the drama... end the suffering already.

Oh, it’s Riven, who’s smoking, not Sky. I said I can’t tell them apart.

Great, now I hate that fangirl, too. Ew, smokers.

Aand... that’s the first episode.

Honestly, I had the feeling this was gonna be the Last Airbender movie for the Winx series and... yeah, I was right. Not terrible on it’s own (though not very good, either), but become infinitely worse, when you know the source material.

#winx #fate winx saga #winx salt #winx fate salt #stream of consciousness #show review #no spoilers please

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miss-writes-a-lot · 5 years ago

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Fair Game Babies: The One Where Raven Turns Into a Bird And Shouts At Another Kid

(Decided to write a fair game baby fic with my little guys. This one is where Briar meets Raven in the woods.)

Fandom: RWBY

Ship: Fair game/ Qrow x Clover

Summary: the young Branwen twin Briar encounters a strange woman in the woods of Patch who mocks her family. A screaming match ensues.

WARNINGS: Violence (most against a child.), some threatening of a child, mild cursing, and overall, it sucks.

--------

Briar was prone to getting lost. A lot.

Whether it was in a supermarket, or a school field trip three cities over, if she wasn't holding onto someone's hand, she most likely bound to get lost.

Patch was really the only exception. It was a small island and she pretty much knew everyone there, so the chances she would get lost somewhere unreachable would be slim when she was out exploring.

On this particular visit to her cousin's house, she went out exploring in woods behind their house-something she had done a million times both with her brother and on her own.

She was using a random stick that she had found to poke around at the various mushrooms she discovered growing on the sides of trees.

"Come on, do something! Explode, turn me into a zombie, anything!" She mumbled, whacking this one particular blue mushroom with a weird spotted pattern.

"Is this really it?"

Briar whipped around at the sudden voice of a woman. She searched the trees, but no one was there.

"H-hello...?"

"I really can't believe that this is it..."

Up above, a corvid landed on a branch on the same tree that Briar was stood under. Briar was still lost. "A....bird?"

"I'm not surprised that my brother would raise such a weakling."

She jumped back in surprised. The bird was talking!

"W-who are you?!"

"Look at you. You're just like your father. A scared, weak, blind little kid that will eat from whatever hand will feed it." The bird snarled.

"How do...how do know my dad? Why are you saying such mean things about him...?" She asked, her cluelessness shining through.

The bird scoffed, "Are you that stupid?! Has that idiot really made you so soft?! Open your eyes, kid! Your father is a failure! He's a traitor!"

Briar balled her fists, feeling her blood boil. "S-stop it..."

"He married a fool. He married a soldier who blindly followed orders and look where it got them. He had two kids that can't tell their own heads from FUCKING holes in the ground!"

She shook her head, covering her ears. "N-no! You're a liar! You don't know my dads! They're the best! And you have no right to talk about them like that! You don't even know my dads! Or my brother!"

"Believe me kid, I know a lot more about Qrow than you ever will!"

Briar picked up the stick and threw it at the bird, knocking her out of the tree. "YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A NO GOOD GRIMM!"

"AND YOU'RE WEAK!" The bird shouted, know a full grown woman with long black hair and burning red eyes. She looked exactly like Yang. Now she was really scared. She was horrified. She could feel her hands tremble as she caught a glimpse of the large sword she was brandishing.

"Look at you...You're scared!"

"Yeah, because I'm ten and you're some crazy old bird lady thing! I don't even know you or how you know my dad!"

The stranger gritted her teeth. "Isn't it obvious? He's my brother."

Oh. Shit.

This was her. This was the aunt that her dad and papa never talked about. The one that first left uncle Tiyang. This was her, leader of Branwen tribe. Raven Branwen.

"You...You're her? My dad's sister?"

Raven nodded. "That's right."

"Why are you here? To kill me? Torture me? Or are you just here to keep telling me how terrible my dad is? Because if that's the case, just get out of here! I don't want to hear it!"

"Briar, your father is sheltering you. When you grow up, they are just going to keep lying to you!"

"They're not lying! You're lying!"

"ENOUGH WITH YOUR CHILDISH CRAP! Your fathers are nothing but traitorsa and liars! They know nothing of strength!"

Briar scoffed. "This coming from the woman who left her husband and daughter for a bunch of dumbasses! You're not strong! You're the coward you're saying I am!"

Raven stepped forward, opening her mouth to speak but was quickly interrupted by Clover's voice.

"Briar! Time to come inside!"

Briar glanced back at Raven, scowling at her. "My dad is a hero. He doesn't run away. Even when times get tough, he fights. He's amazing. You're nothing but a wannabe."

"Briar!"

"Coming!"

Briar turned to walk away but she barely took a few steps away before she felt Raven's hand pull her by the hair while the other clamped her mouth shut. Briar kicked and screamed, flailing around as Raven dragged her back.

'Papa can't hear me. She's gonna hurt me of I don't do anything! But I haven't unlocked my semblance yet...what do I do?!'

Raven grabbed her shirt and pulled her up to her face. "Keep your mouth shut and maybe I won't hurt you too bad." She snarled.

Briar growled, when a plan came into her head. She kicked off one of her shoes and flung it into a nearby bush to draw Clover's attention to their direction. She then wiggled her arm out of Raven's grasp and elbowed her hard in the face. She dropped Briar and stumbled back in pain. For a moment, Briar was proud that she made a grown woman bleed.

But there was no time for that. She took off running, never looking back to see if Raven was chasing her. She only stopped when she collided with Clover's chest.

"Briar? What-?"

"Papa! Papa! She-she had me! She was trying to hurt me-!" Briar cried.

"What?! Who had you?" He questioned, panicked.

"Ra-her! Ra-I-" she tried to get the words out but it seemed that she was both in shock and exhausted from running.

"Easy honey, easy. Breathe. I'm gonna take you inside, okay?"

She nodded as Clover picked her up and carried her back inside. Reed immediately ran up with a smile on his face, which soon disappeared after seeing how distressed his twin was.

Qrow came up to them, taking Briar from Clover's arms. "What happened to her?"

"I don't know. Someone in the woods attacked her or something. I'm going back to check."

"Be careful."

Clover went out with Kingfisher in hand as Qrow moved Briar to the couch.

"C'mere, sweetheart. Let's calm down."

"Daddy...y-you're a good guy..." Briar murmured.

"What?"

"Y-you're a good guy...you're the best dad ever. I like the way you fight, the way you read us bedtime stories and tell us about your missions. You're the best. I love you-"

"Bri, sweetie. Calm down...."

Briar hugged her father tightly, never wanting to let him go.

Raven was a liar. She was a big fat liar. And worse, she was a stalker.

She had been watching them. All of them.

Why was she watching them?

What did she want with them?

What did she want with her?

[A/N: apologies to everyone who was either triggered by this fic or found the way I portrayed Raven offensive or terrible. I'm not totally happy with it either and I might rewrite this but I want your feedback on what I can do much better or different. Have a nice day/afternoon/night.]

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jae-bummer · 6 years ago

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An Earthworm’s Purpose

Request: Hi Kay!! I’ve been binge reading your fics and I’m in love with your writing 😫 Can I request a scenario/imagine of Monsta X’s Wonho? Super fluffy, Wonho is on tour and reader is missing him (they’re dating), Wonho is on his way home to reader & reader has no idea. Reader goes to bed and is woken up by Wonho crawling into bed. Also sorry if I dictated that wayyyy too much but I thought about it and thought you could bring it to life ☺️

Pairing: Monsta X Wonho x Reader

Genre: Fluff

**Disclaimer: GIF is not mine! if you know who it belongs to, please let a girl know so i can give credit!!)

“It says poor connection,” you grumbled, flopping over in your bed. Your boyfriend’s image had become obscured by the blurry iPhone screen.

“Really? Everything is coming through on my side!” Wonho’s chipper voice called from the abyss. You could tell he was smiling, even without seeing his face.

“Oh good, so you can still see all of my unattractive features from this angle,” you laughed, making sure to emphasize your multiplied chins.

Wonho let out an amused giggle, one he normally did before nuzzling his face into you. “Even when you try to look like an earthworm, you are still a butterfly.”

“And what makes the butterfly superior to the earthworm?” you gasped in mock offense. “Earthworms have purpose, and what is the purpose of the butterfly?”

“To make me smile,” he chuckled. “But that’s my personal answer, I’m sure someone much smarter than me has a better answer.”

“According to Google, butterflies exist to be eaten by other things,” you muttered, squinting at your screen.

“No wonder you’re so tasty,” Wonho laughed.

“You’re so greasy,” you groaned, flipping back to your FaceTime call. Wonho’s face was still hidden by a poor connection.

“I was wondering why your screen paused,” he sighed. “I should have known you would be searching something.”

“You know me,” you grinned. “I always want the right answer.”

“Oh? So is there a right answer to every question then?” he teased.

“Absolutely,” you nodded. “Speaking of, I have a question.”

“Of course you do,” he laughed, his face finally popping on your phone screen.

“Ah, there you are!” you smiled easily.

“While I would love to distract you now that you can actually see me,” Wonho cooed. “The anticipation is killing me. What’s the question?”

“Fine,” you hummed. “When are you coming home?”

Wonho’s beaming face slowly sank into a solemn expression. He heaved a deep sigh before beginning to bite his lip. “Y/N.”

“Remember, there is a wrong answer,” you prodded, trying to keep the atmosphere light-hearted. Judging by his expression, you knew whatever he was about to say was already tearing him up inside.

“Then maybe I shouldn’t answer at all,” he said quietly, his eyes looking past the camera and into his hotel room.

“Not giving an answer is just as bad as giving the wrong one,” you chided. “Now don’t look so serious!”

“How can I not be!” he groaned. “When I know what I have to say will only bring you heartache.”

“It’s all about presentation,” you grinned. If he were beside you, you would have been poking his pecks. That would have made him laugh.

“Not soon enough,” he sighed, finally allowing some sort of answer to be heard.

“Which is?” you continued.

“Weeks?” he winced. “Over a month?”

“Over a month,” you croaked. “Not the right answer.”

“But it was the truth,” he nodded. “You can’t fault me for choosing not to lie to you. Kihyun’s partner has been convinced he would be coming home for at least two weeks now.”

“I appreciate the truth,” you sighed. “It still doesn’t mean that I want to hear it though.”

“Have I told you how gorgeous you are?” he said with another small wince.

“Flattery is not a bandage, sir,” you grumbled.

“I thought you would want me to say something you like to hear,” he murmured.

“What I would like to hear is that you’re coming home,” you muttered.

Wonho sighed again as he stared with pitiful eyes into the camera. He reminded you of a battered puppy on one of those animal shelter commercials.

“Don’t look at me like that,” you grumbled.

“I’m just looking at you,” he said quietly, his pout somehow growing deeper.

“The hell you are!” you gasped. “Now I just feel guilty.”

“It’s getting late,” Wonho managed. He looked away from the screen before scrubbing a hand roughly through his hair.

Now you felt bad. You knew what it looked like when Wonho began to shut down, and you loathed yourself whenever you were the one responsible for it.

“Jagi,” you said with a slight whine.

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?” he continued, chewing on his lip. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” you said quietly, remorse coating your every thought.

Without another word, Wonho disconnected the call.

You knew you were being selfish and immature, but when Wonho traveled, the distance really seemed to become endless. Letting out a breathy groan, you flopped onto your stomach and stuffed your face into the thick blanket on your bed.

Why did things have to be so hard?

Wonho grimaced as he hung up the phone.

“Tell me,” Minhyuk said softly, filing his nails. “How does it feel to be a big, fat, LIAR.”

“Well, I think you took it a bit far with the “fat” part,” Wonho pouted. “But just so you know, it felt terrible.”

“Good because it should,” Minhyuk nodded. “Y/N deserved the actual truth.”

“But if I said the actual truth, then it would ruin the surprise!” Wonho gasped.

“Oh, you only call it a surprise because Kihyun threatened to skewer and barbecue you if you told Y/N the truth and it got down the grapevine to whoever he’s dating,” Minhyuk sighed. “Personally I thought you would be a waste to skewer and barbecue, too much muscle.”

“But you just called me fat,” Wonho muttered.

“Not when it comes to cannibalism,” Minhyuk laughed. “Only lying.”

“Why do you make things so weird?” Wonho winced, shaking his head as he plopped beside his friend.

“I’m so unappreciated,” Minhyuk whined.

Wonho rolled his eyes before putting an arm around the younger man. “You’ll be just fine...

...and so will Y/N when I end up coming home early.”

You scrunched your lips, attempting to blow at the rogue strand of hair that had fallen over your forehead. Furrowing your brows, you leaned against your front door as you attempted the action while simultaneously sliding off your shoes. It was late, and you weren’t surprised to see the clock close to the AM hours as you struggled over your threshold. With Wonho out of town and barely responding to your texts, you had thrown yourself into your work. It felt nice to think about things that didn’t concern him when he was all that you craved.

You knew you had been wrong in your last call. You knew you weren’t being fair to him and were well aware of his career before the two of you ever began dating. It wasn’t like his schedule was a surprise to you, but it was just draining sometimes. It was easy to recognize that his work was difficult, but it was hard to realize that the toll wasn’t just on him, it was on everyone who cared about him as well.

Tugging your phone from your pocket, you rolled your eyes as you saw a lack of notifications lighting up the lock screen. If he wanted to be aloof and punish you, you probably deserved it.

But it didn’t make it hurt any less.

Grumbling to yourself, you walked down the hallway, stripping your clothes as you went. You were too tired to eat anything and you didn’t have much of an appetite anyway. Crawling into your bed, you barely managed to turn off the light before your head hit the pillow and you fell into a deep sleep.

Small snores echoed through your bedroom as Wonho’s feet gently padded across the hardwood. It was impossible for him to keep the smile from his face as he took in the curves of your sleeping body, desperately holding back the urge to let his fingers to roam the skin he had missed.

Walking as quietly as his large frame would allow, he winced with every small floor board groan or miscellaneous apartment noise. He wanted to get in bed before you realized that he had been lying to you for the past week. Partially because he was deathly afraid of Kihyun, but mostly because he couldn’t wait to see your surprised expression.

Leaning into the mattress, he held his breath as your snoring faltered. He tried not to chuckle. You only snored when you were dead tired, so it would most likely take a lot to wake you. Crawling with snail like speed, Wonho finally eased his way toward the mattress. His biceps pulsed with the effort it took to lay his body easily onto the sheets, only releasing a breath when he was flat on the pillow top.

You felt like someone was watching you. Unsure if it was part of a weird dream or reality, you didn’t want to move. You couldn’t confirm if it was true or not. There was no Wonho here to protect you from any potential peeping toms or burglars. Surely if you remained asleep, they wouldn’t attack you. Who attacks a sleeping person?

Slowly peeling one eye open, you swept your vision across the room, cataloging every shadow. You knew you should have never bought that dumb ficus. It made such a good spot for potential creeps to hide behind.

Letting your eye adjust to the darkness, you finally opened the other, surveying your surroundings in full.

It was then that you noticed there was a sizeable weight added to your mattress and something was placed in bed beside you.

No, not something.

Someone.

You let out a small shriek as you took your pillow in your arm, poised to defend yourself as you yanked back the comforter with your opposite hand.

“Good to see you too,” a sleepy Wonho smirked.

“Won-Won-” you stuttered, looking at your boyfriend in disbelief. Shock and relief flooded your system, but any emotion was quickly replaced by anger.

“SHIN,” you screeched, slamming him in the torso with your pillow. “HO.” Another slam. “SEOK.”

“Hey, hey!” he gasped through laughter. “Don’t kill me!”

“If I wanted to kill you, I would smother you!” you whisper shouted. “I just want to make you hurt like you’ve made me hurt the past few days, you big...big meanie!”

Wonho laughed again as you pulled the pillow from your view and truly got a good look at his face, albeit in the darkness. There he was, your smiling, incredible, handsome boyfriend.

“I SHOULD kill you,” you began quietly, your anger now turning into happiness. You felt the tears begin welling up on your lashes. “But...but I would miss you too much.”

You let out a wail as you flopped toward him, allowing him to wrap you in his muscular arms. Nuzzling your face into his chest, you took a deep breath. You couldn’t believe he was here.

“Is this a dream?” you wept. You focused on Wonho’s soft chuckle as he peppered your forehead with dozens of small kisses.

“Not a dream,” he confirmed. “But a pretty good surprise if I do say so myself.”

“You’re so mean!” you gasped, allowing him to kiss your face despite your hurt feelings. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Isn’t this much more fun than you knowing I was going to show up?” he laughed.

“Fun isn’t the word,” you muttered. “I hope you got the response you wanted.”

“Well, I didn’t intend on making you cry,” he hummed. “But I am glad that the tears are happy ones...they are happy, right?”

“Yes, you turd,” you laughed. “They’re the happiest tears I’ve ever cried.”

“Good,” he sighed, pulling you closer to him. “Those should be the only type of tears you cry.”

Tilting your head up, you grumbled in agreement before deciding to press a kiss along the underside of his jaw. “You’re home,” you confirmed more to yourself than to him.

He laughed before scrunching his head backward and pressing a kiss to your nose. “I am.”

“You know,” you giggled. “You kind of look like an earthworm from this angle.”

Wonho let out a loud shout of a laugh. “You know, someone once told me earthworms were superior because they have purpose.”

“Yeah,” you chuckled. “Like creating manure.”

“A purpose,” he hummed, completely ignoring your snide comment as he pressed his face against your hair, deep in thought. “And I think my purpose is to love you.”

#wonho #monsta x #wonho fluff #monsta x fluff #shin wonho #wonho fic #wonho oneshot #wonho fanfic #wonho scenario #dating wonho #boyfriend wonho #monsta x fic #monsta x oneshot #monsta x fanfic #monsta x scenario #dating monsta x #boyfriend monsta x

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kpop-pick-me-up · 6 years ago

Text

So, can I say something real quick about Kpop idols?

This has been a thought on my mind basically since I joined the Kpop community, and I know some people might react weird or not understand what I'm trying to say but that doesn't matter to me. Putting this out there does.

*ahem* NO KPOP IDOL IVE SEEN PEOPLE CALL CHUBBY IS ACTUALLY CHUBBY.*ahem*

Like for real. I see posts talking about how Suga's cheeks get chubbier on break, and how Haechan's cheeks have gotten chubbier, or "before" and "after" pictures of idols who have gone on a diet and people saying "I miss when they were chubby" like.... They never were and they aren't. This is just what they'd actually look like if they got a normal amount of sleep, ate like a normal human, and didn't dance for 4-12 hours a day. That's not chubby, that's how they'd naturally look.

Chubby, to me means that a person is slightly overweight, or that they're a healthy weight but naturally softer and can look more fuller. Which is all beautiful. And I'm aware this can be a culture difference because of how idols are expected to be thin and perfect but sometimes when I look at them I just think about how unhealthy some (not all) of them must be physically.

Because on a mini tangent: when someone eats so little amount of food for so long and is they are always in a caloric deficit (so let's say youre recommended amount to maintain your weight is 2000, but you constantly eat 1500, or 1200-1400 calories a day) their metabolism adapts so that it's natural state of burning to maintain IS 1500 or 1200-1400. So they'd HAVE to eat less to lose weight, or fix their metabolism by slowly increasing their food intake so their metabolism can adjust to a normal amount of food again. But to do that their weight would plateau or they'd even gain a little bit. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with an idol gaining weight or doing any of this, except for the fact that they'd be called "fat" by the media. Nobody actually seems to care about an idol's health. And imagine what calling them "chubby" does to them when it's just them eating normally. Why do you THINK idols always go on strict diets before a comeback? Because they know that if they eat normally people would know and call them chubby. And I'm not saying this offends them, but I know that I would feel so pressured and judged subconsciously to eat less and lose the "chubbiness" because the media must see it too if fans do.

And I know some idols don't care or even just say they don't care (but trust me, they probably do), and I know some of you guys don't mean to hurt their feelings and just mean to say it innocently, it still encourages this unhealthy mindset that all idols MUST be borderline unhealthy, and just BARELY a healthy weight or diet amount. This gives their employers a reason to make them do those crazy restricted diets (ice cube diet, or the IU diet for example) and force them to lose weight because they KNOW and SEE what you do as well, and can see when you comment on it.

To put this into a different perspective as well, as someone who's been struggling with an eating disorder, looking at really thin idols like Jimin, Suga, Haechan, etc who all weigh less than me and are taller than me and to see them called "chubby" kicked my mind into comparison mode and said "then I must be HUGE." Or "I won't ever officially be skinny or pretty until I weigh the same as them or less" because that's how a sick mind works. So not only does this infect the idols minds and encourage the bad mindset, but it can infect their fans minds to think that they aren't good enough.

I've never wanted to point fingers at this because I love it so much, but I can't be a fucking liar anymore and hide behind it because I want to get better, and I'm tired of believing that I'm too big, or that I'll always be chubby until I'm 90lbs like all the female Kpop idols. But sometimes the Kpop fandom can trigger my eating disorder. There, I said it. Fight me. Because you call thin idols chubby, and you implant this way of thinking that how they eat is okay, and that weighing 90lbs and eating 1200 calories a day is a lifestyle or that constantly restricting and not focusing on nutrients or what body type I am is how life works because IT ISNT. Some people may be that naturally, but the fact that some idols noticably change a little bit when they eat normally on breaks shows that how they are on stage isn't natural.

And to end this off as a disclaimer again, I know people don't mean to be triggering, and they don't think there's anything wrong in what they're doing (which I understand), but you also have to really take a second to think about what you're saying a little bit. Chubby is a word that is either black or white to people. Either they think it's cute, or they think it's an insult. That all depends on culture and self esteem and blah blah blah. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with being chubby, or that it's a bad thing to be because it is definitely NOT and I think everyone is beautiful how they're meant to be. So of you're 90lbs or 140, or 180, or 200+ or anything in between naturally you're all still beautiful and have your own necessary standards to consume to be healthy that will be different from everyone else. However, that is where the issue lies. Because most idols weren't born as thin as they are, they are usually forced and conditioned to be that way. But to help you decide whether it's okay to make these comments, ask yourself this when you're about to call an idol chubby:

1: am I calling them chubby because they're "eating well" (a normal diet) and they've started filling out?

2:Would I like it if someone I loved, respected or whom I cared about their opinion called me "chubby" after finally getting off of a restricted diet and just eating healthy but normal amounts of food?

3: If I was a Kpop media outlet and saw that they gained weight, what would I write? (Really put yourself in their shoes and be honest.)

4: Am I calling them chubby cheeks because they're just puffing them out and being cute? (Then okay, it's fine)

5: when I say this, are they really chubby? Or has my mind been twisted to think they are just like their critics?

And I know that may seem extreme, but that's how it is. You all preach about how self love should be more important in the "toxic" Kpop industry but still subconsciously encourage its toxic behavior. So instead of comments like "omg your cheeks are so chubby now! <3" or "awwww look at his tummy he gained!" Say: "Omg, you look so healthy! ", " You've been looking extra cute recently 😍" and stuff like that. Because it still gets the point across that you like seeing them healthier, but it doesn't use possibly triggering words like chubby or thick because they are neither.

Anyways that's my mini rant. I don't mean to trigger people, or point fingers because I used to do it too. But I think we all need to collectively recognize this as part of the issue, and say, "huh, maybe that could hurt their feelings a little but EVEN IF I DONT MEAN TO, OR ITS NORMAL WHERE IM FROM TO SAY AS A COMPLIMENT"

Because as one of my favorite quotes puts it in words perfectly "You don't get to decide whether you hurt someone or not." So yes, people like me are sensitive, and yes, it may not seem like a big deal to you. But honestly I've sat by and respected all of your guy's opinions and words for a while now, and I think it's now okay for me to say "hey, this kind of bugs me a bit." Without being looked at as weird or annoying.

So in the nicest way possible, say what you want, but I'm not taking this down. I've made myself clear and as understanding as possible. But people like me who have an eating disorder, had one in the past, or are on the road to developing one, or someone who is about to start one of the insane Kpop diets, needs to know that this isn't normal. And they shouldn't compare themselves to the unhealthy kpop standards like it did.

Anyways, thanks for listening to my rant.

~DeepSheep

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kweebtrash · 6 years ago

Text

Just Say Goodnight and Go (M)

Messy Chapter 7

Pairing(s): OC X Johnny

Genre: College AU, Fuckboy AU, Smut, The fluff chapter TM

Summary: Fuckboys are basically good for one thing. You hit it and quit it- except when his voice draws you in, his body keeps you there, and dumb ass feelings linger making things particularly messy.

Warnings: alcohol, night terrors/ panic attacks, minimal talk about assault.

Features: body worship, choking/breathing denial, talk about oral fixation, thigh high kink, a bunch of makeout sessions, a little bit of a handjob, still exploring the daddy kink a bit, overstretching, rough sex and semi-soft sex, really bad drunk decisions.

Word Count: around 17.6k

A/N: ‘they’ and ‘she’ are used interchangeably on purpose. I didn’t exactly hit 20k like I thought but I was damn close lol. Note: In case you don’t know Rilakkuma is a Japanese character (like Hello Kitty) but from the brand San-X. This chapter has got a bunch of fluff in it, but ya’ll know fluff aint my usual thing that I write about. So tell me if it was good or bad please.

Messy Masterlist Buy me a Ko-Fi Other Stories

“What do people like….do on dates?”

“Eri, what the hell kind of question is that? You act like you never been on one before.” Quinn said before squinting in the mirror to viciously measure if their eyeliner wings were even.

“Like i mean...i have but also i'm antisocial and some if the best times i've had with people were just like hanging out and doing nothing. Like Yuta and i just lay around and watch anime-”

“While he fingers you.”

“Lucas and I play video games.”

“Until his attention span goes to eating you out.”

I huffed. “Listen…”

“You went out on dates with Jungwoo, didn't you?”

“Yeah but we would like go to parks during the spring and walk around, or he'd follow me around the mall and blush if I so much as mentioned going to look at underwear in a store. We went to an aquarium solely because i just wanted to hear him say the word in his adorable accent all day. But those are things that I did when like…” i sighed and set my eyeshadow brush down. “When I was in love.”

“And you're not in love with Johnny?”

“Johnny's a fuckboy. You really think he'd hold my hand and push me on a swing set at the park? Please. He's gonna take one look at these thigh highs and want to fuck as soon as we start this so called date and that's a-ok with me.”

“Eri, you're a bad liar.”

“You're the one who suggested going on a stupid date with Jaehyun! What do you two do all the time when you hang out anyway, hmm?”

Quinn squinted again, glaring at their uneven ink line before handing the eyeliner pen to me. “Fix itttttttt.” they whined. I sighed and grabbed a makeup wipe to try and clean up some of the unevenness before filling it out with the ink again. “But we honestly fuck a lot. Like a lot a lot. He heard about Taeil helping me study and wanted to help too but instead of being NICE he fingered me and wouldn't let me cum until i got an answer right-which is very hard when his stupid hot long fingers are digging inside you. Then one time I decided to cook for him, because i'm perfect wifey material and he lasted a whole minute of helping me in the kitchen before he was grabbing at my ass.”

“Great, a bigger slut. So why the hell did you come up with this boba date idea in the first place?!” I painted on the small wings in short strokes, connecting it to the already thickened lined that covered Quinn's lashline.

They shrugged, which made me purse my lips and glare down at them for moving. “I don't know. I basically said, Jaehyun you're taking me to get Boba and then I thought it'd be nice for you to come along because you’re maybe-kinda- sorta-my security blanket. Then i realized i asked him out on a date without meaning for it to sound like a date and then i gay panicked and asked you to come but that only made it a DOUBLE DATE and then i had to pretend that everything was natural and I-”

“Quinn. I should stab you in the eye with this pen.”

“I CANT HELP IT! Sometimes he's really stupid and cute and i hate his fuckin’ perfect teeth and perfect smile and those STUPID dimples. I want to punch his face but also kiss him endlessly. I especially hate it when he's like...nice and not a complete asshole because it just makes me want to be around him more!” They sighed.

I finished correcting the wing on their other eye and plopped back down in my desk chair. “I know what you mean...after the party Johnny and I spent the entire night together and it was definitely a journey. I found out things about him that i never could even imagine happening to someone like him. And it just...it made me sad. All i wanted to do was see him happy. I wanted to make him happy.”

“What do you mean? What happened to him?”

“I shouldn't tell you…” i whispered.

“Eri, we're best friends.”

“Yeah but...he's starting to trust me and I don't want to mess that up.”

“I wouldn't ever tell anyone. You know that.”

I fidgeted in my seat as i felt my morals be compromised a bit. Quinn was my best friend that I told practically everything to but Johnny was my...fuckbuddy who had gone through enough for a lifetime and needed someone who would be there for him. I still yearned to be that someone and wanted to solidify my place as a friend he could count on. I knew Quinn wouldn't tell a soul so I was sure the secret was safe but it still made me feel a bit uneasy. “I...i...don't know…”

“Was it about that chick at the party? The like weird looking one that was all over him?”

I nodded then grabbed their little hands, squeezing them tight. “Just swear on our friendship you won't ever say anything. Not even to Jae.”

“I swear.”

“Ok...and don't think or treat of him any different. Go on hating him like normal. It's ok.”

“Yes, Eri, I will. I swear.”

“She...that girl...assaulted him while he was coming down from a bad high and was sick. And you know, he's a big dude. He's tall and muscular and shit- everyone would think he'd be able to fight her off but he can only remember bits and pieces because he was so messed up. Then he described to me how he felt like...how he felt so numb and helpless. It was hard for him…”

“Eri, the same has happened to me. Why would you think I would tell anyone about this?”

“I know,” i practically whimpered. “I didn't mean it like that. I just...i kinda care about him now. I want to be there for him but without making stuff too complicated. I honestly just think he needs someone he can rely on.”

“But then you fell in love with him.”

“I'm going to need you and Doyoung to stop saying that. Are you two conspiring against me?”

“It's just a bit obvious to people that aren't only here to fuck you.” Quinn kissed me gently and returned my little hand squeeze. “It's good that you're there for him. He needs it. I wish we could've been friends sooner so you would've been there for me. You have a good ability to be a pillar of strength for people. But don't let that consume you either. He needs to get through it on his own too.”

“I know. I want him to but this is where the stubborn fuck boy part still remains and makes me want to throw his giant ass across the room.”

“Yeah, he's still stupid about a lot of things but any step towards healing is progress.”

I pouted and gave myself another glance in the mirror before adding more smokiness to my outer crease. “Yeah, I know. It's still fresh though so I can't rush him. I just need to make sure it doesn't get too messy.”

“And also make sure he somehow becomes your boyfriend?”

“WILL YOU CUT THAT OUT?! WHY DON'T YOU GO BE JAE'S BOYFRIEND, YA LIL TURD.”

“Eww no. I don't want to be near his stupid abs and dimples and perfect teeth and soft hair all day. Absolutely not.”

We both glared at each other for a moment. Our weak facades to our feelings were no match for one another and we couldread each other like open books. Things were getting to be a little bit too serious for the both of us and I may have admitted it to myself during my talk with Doyoung but there was no way in hell that I was ever going to say that I had feelings for Johnny out loud. I hoped that I would eventually get over him enough to just keep things casual. I was sure my fear of love was the perfect blockade for that. Nothing could get past that impenetrable wall. So i felt safe for now. Quinn nudged me, breaking our glaring contest and making us both laugh.

“How did we end up like this?” I asked.

“Like what? Stringing along a bunch of hot guys waiting to do whatever we want them to do? Pure talent. We're amazing. And i am making them pay for the boba.”

“Well duh. If they don't we can just throw them out and solidify our relationship with Lucas. I mean he has everything they have anyway: big dick, deep voice, nice lips, can reach things on the top shelf. It's all we need.” I added a final touch of setting spray and wiped at the powder fallout that covered the top of my boobs. “Oh, by the way, do I look ok in this?”

I stood up so Quinn could see my black ensemble of a Simple Plan t-shirt I had since I was 15, a suspender skirt, black thigh highs and matching high-top converses. They squinted and looked me up and down, even making me turn for them. “It's okay.” They stated simply.

“Ok? What do you mean ok? Do I look fat or something?”

“No it's just...i mean it's very you.”

“What do you mean by that?” I asked.

“Like very...high school emo. But your hair and makeup is really cute and he'll like the thigh highs. What are you wearing underneath?”

“Underneath?” I hadn't given much thought to my underwear. “I just picked whatever was in my drawer.”

“Well do you want to entice him a bit?”

I shrugged. “I guess a little. Really make this date worthwhile since i'm sure he's gonna be a jerk about the whole thing. I’m not even sure why he agreed to go.”

“Duh,” Quinn said. “Because he likes you. If he isn't a shitty date then you can give him a little something. And if he is, don't show him at all. I have a cute white lace set you'd look good in. You should wear that.”

“Wear lingerie the entire time? That underwire is gonna kill me.”

“You know I hate bras as much as you do but it'll be cute. Trust me.” Quinn got up from my bed and went over to their room leaving me to follow. When they pulled out the set from their drawer I almost couldn't believe how small it was.

“Uh...you want me to put all of my ass in that?”

“Didn't you say he likes your butt? With this and the thigh highs you can ask him to eat you out and i bet he finally would.”

“Oh...right.” I took the small underwear and bra and started to change into them, not bothering to bring up his previous trauma surrounding oral. It was just easier not going into more into detail about it. I slithered out of my old underwear and into the lace panties which seemed to morph into a thong between my ass cheeks. I adjusted myself over and over in the bra, trying to stuff myself into the seemingly small cups. “Should I really look this desperate? I mean we've fucked like half a dozen times before.”

“It's not desperate! Just trust me. Do that whole femdom thing you do and feel sexy. It may make you feel less nervous if you just pretend you have confidence.”

“Pfft, i doubt it.” I pulled my shirt back over my head, practically feeling my tits at my throat. I stepped over to Quinn's full length mirror and adjusted myself over and over again. Feigning confidence I could do sometimes but alcohol was a lot more helpful with that.

“Will you stop fussing? You're making me more nervous than I already am. We have to be cool sluts not….stupid schoolgirls!” Quinn hissed.

“Yeah, well….i am a stupid schoolgirl and I hate it! I don't want it Quinn!”

“It's just boba! We got this! It's not like-” Suddenly we heard three sharp raps against our door. Our mouths snapped shut and panic washed over us. We looked at each other as if we didn't know what to do. “You do it.” They whispered.

“No, no! You! It was your idea that got us into this mess in the first place!” I planted my hands on their back and forced then towards the door. “Go!”

“You come with me! What are you gonna do?Just stay in here?!”

“Yes! And maybe die alone so i don't have to be embarrassed!” A few more knocks came again and Quinn and I fussed with our hair, our clothes, checking our breaths and if we had things in our teeth. Eventually we stood in front of the door, squaring our shoulders and pretending like everything was totally fine. I was the one who set my hand on the door handle, swinging it open to see my worst nightmare.

The four of us stared at one another like lost children, wide eyed and scared. It was so strange seeing them dressed up that it was like a shock to the system. I was used to the Johnny in sweatpants or basketball shorts and hoodies but now he was...God, he was stunning. Everything; from his hair, his lips, his eyes behind the round wire frames he wore, and his incredibly perfect long legs trapped in his torn up skinny jeans. I hated to admit it-absolutely loathed it- but he looked like complete boyfriend material; so soft and cozy yet still oozing sexiness and a little bit of mystery. I especially loved the leather jacket that hung over him. It made me want to throw myself into his arms and get lost in a sea of his kisses. My heart was fluttering, pathetically so, and it was almost impossible to breathe.

I saw his eyes travel up and down my body, stopping at certain places he wanted to linger a bit longer on. I waited nervously for him to say something, anything at all. He seemed to be stuck, his eyes fluctuating through thought processes and possible scenarios. I nibbled at my lip and casually looked over and Quinn and Jae. Jae looked quite handsome himself; a soft sweet rendition of a guy i didn't quite like and was surprised to see like this. He looked comfy in his hoodie and jacket combo. A warm beanie was perched on his head and his light wash jeans were a perfect compliment. His dimples were on full display along with his perfect teeth Quinn so happily gushed about. I could see them already swooning over him, and probably thinking of a way to get into his pants.

“You look,” My eyes cut back to Johnny as I heard his deep voice finally. “You look um...c-cute.” The olive tone of his skin flared with peachy pinks as soon as that word left his lips.

Cute.

This fuckboy thought I was cute. My heart was in my shoes, a melted puddle of teenage passion and urgency for romance. I giggled nervously and stared down at our feet, noticing his checkered vans and my black converses. “U-um...thank you. I think you look really handsome.” I tucked a stray hair back and gazed up at him. His expression was nothing short of flustered and he cleared his throat to break up the awkwardness.

“Are we just gonna stand here looking like idiots or are we gonna go? I need coffee.” He said.

Jaehyun broke from leaning against the doorframe and boldly took Quinn's hand. “Yeah, let's go. Johnny, you driving or am i?”

Johnny tossed his keys over to Jae who caught them with his free hand. “I'll just drive when we come back.”

Jae and Quinn started heading downstairs, leaving me to rush to get my purse and lock the door behind me. The minuscule walk down to the parking lot of the apartment complex was enough to keep the awkward silence between Johnny and I. I had no idea what I should say or if we should even strike up a conversation at all. I realized that i really didn't know much about him other than his traumatic past and insecurities surrounding it. It seemed trivial but even something like learning his favorite color was starting to become appealing to me. “So…”

He looked back at me from midway down the steps. “So?”

“Boba, huh?” I wish i couldn't speak.

“Yes? Boba?” He seemed just as confused as I was and i rushed to sprint the rest of the way to the car. It didn't take him long to catch up and we were in the back seat and on our way in practically seconds. I kept to my side of the seat against the door, leaving a gaping space between us. Quinn and Jae seemed lost in their own conversation that seemed as natural as the moon controlling the tides. I almost envied them. When the hell did they get so buddy buddy? I briefly looked over at Johnny who seemed to be more interested in gazing out the window then having any interaction with me. I shifted uncomfortably and slid one leg over the other. I adjusted my skirt a bit, trying to make sure I remained decent but it was just a little too short even for me.

I thought I felt Johnny's eyes on me but when i turned to glance at him, he was back to being distracted by the scenery outside his eyes. I checked my phone, trying to use it as a way to ignore my self deprecating and nervous thoughts as well as to make the time go by. It wasn't until Jae cut a harsh turn that I was sent flying from my sacred spot and into Johnny.

“Dude, chill with that!” Johnny reprimanded.

“My bad! Stupid GPS said it at the last second!” Jae replied.

I tried squirming away from Johnny but Jae's lead foot on the gas pedal was making it harder to adjust myself. I felt Johnny's hand grip at my waist almost as if he wanted to keep me close to him. “You okay?” He said in a hushed tone.

I nodded and tried not to look at the warm hazel of his eyes. “I guess your roommate is fuckin’ speed racer.”

“Yeah, he's not the best driver. He only got his license last year.”

I sat up, finally able to regain my balance when Jae's speeding evened out. I inched myself away from Johnny but found his strength keeping me plastered to him. His arm shifted from my waist to around my shoulders, leaving plenty of opportunity for my head to rest on his chest. I looked up at him but he still avoided me at all cost. Tentatively, i laid against him. I could hear the quick beats of his heart and couldn't help but wonder if he was nervous too.

What did we have to be nervous about? Getting to actually know each other? Hadn't we done that? Did he even want to learn about me? I guess it would be better to just keep it about sex even with him confiding in me. It would add layers to our fun and could attribute more to the fun we had in our fuck buddy relationship. But my heart remained in a place of wishful thinking and i was pleading for it to stop fucking with my rationality.

I tried to focus on the physicality of it all instead and I was trying to convince myself that a simple hookup was the main goal for today. Get good food, good Boba, and good dick. That would be all. Maybe the date (or fake date, whatever you wanted to call it) wouldn't last long and I could just go home and curl up in my room and stuff all my feelings away under lock and key. I sighed and pulled myself away from being stuck in my brain for a moment. I happened to notice the woodsy notes of his cologne while my head remained tucked under his chin. I craned my lips up to his neck, giving his warm skin a sheepish peck. The scent was of course stronger here and almost sent my head spinning.

Johnny finally looked at me for longer than a few seconds but he didn't say anything at first. He returned my neck kiss with a small press to my lips, giving my shoulder a small squeeze. I decided to speak and hoped that I wouldn't retreat back to my state of being a bumbling idiot. “You smell good.” Well….i could have definitely said something worse.

He chuckled lowly. “Yeah? You like it?” He kissed me again and my hand trailed upwards to cup his face. I simply nodded and closed my eyes, preferring to get lost in him than back in my own thoughts and feelings. I felt his long fingers fall to my knee, trailing higher and barely grazing over the top of my thigh highs where he stopped suddenly. There was tension within him now and i swore I could almost hear a low growl fall on my tongue. “Eri.” He said in a voice so stern my thighs clenched together in response.

“Yes?” I asked, rather innocently.

“You...you wore this on purpose, didn't you?”

“I have no idea what you're talking about.” I played innocently.

He sat back and scoffed, an unsurprised look on his face. I covered my mouth in an attempt to hide my giggle. “You're gonna get your little ass beat.” He whispered.

“Is that a threat or a promise, daddy?” I teased. He nudged me instantly, wide eyed and afraid that Jae or Quinn had heard me.

“Shut up!”

I giggled again turning into full blown laughter at his embarrassment. It was kind of cute to tease him like that even though during the thick of it I would be the more embarrassed one. Quinn turned around then, curious as ever. “What are you laughing at?”

Johnny and I both stiffened up as if we were being scolded in the back seat. My laugh died down a bit and I was able to finally talk. “N-nothing!” I squeaked.

Johnny fussed with his glasses and nervously pushed back his hair, not even acknowledging Quinn. They squinted, judging us and still wondering what had made me laugh. They didn't get to pry any further as Jae pulled into the parking lot of the small cafe. Johnny was the first to get out, not even bothering to wait for us. He just stuffed his hands in his coat pockets and headed towards the cafe door. I pouted, annoyed that he didn't even have the courtesy to wait for us. Jae was the one that held the door open for Quinn and I, leaving me to scowl at Johnny. He ignored me and headed towards the line, towering over the few people ahead of him. I stood by his side, looking over the menu, while Jae and Quinn joined the line behind us.

As I was debating over Rosehip or Lavender flavors I felt a brush against my hand. I thought it may have been an accident but suddenly Johnny’s pinky was curled around mine. I glanced down, making sure I wasn't imagining it and was pleasantly surprised. I smiled for a second until I heard Jae whisper a teasing, “gayyyyy” while Quinn poked at my side. I swatted their hand away and shot both of them a glare which only made Quinn giggle again. The line moved then and Johnny and I stepped forward. He finally spoke to me.

“Do you know what you want?”

“i can't decide between the Lavender or Rosehip one. Both are yummy. Maybe Rosehip and Strawberry? Wait, no, Lavender Vanilla.”

He crinkled his nose in disgust at my flavor choices. “Well, figure it out. We're next.”

“Hush! I know that!” I pouted. He moved up again and discarded my pinky in favor of grabbing his wallet out of his pocket. He ordered a coffee flavor then looked at me.

“Go.”

“Oh, right...uh...” I still had no idea what I wanted and panicked as I felt like I was holding up the line.

“Just order.” I shuffled my weight on either foot while finally deciding on the Rosehip Strawberry with bursting bubbles. I watched as he paid for us then stepped off to the side to wait for the drinks to be completed. “Wanna get a table?”

I nodded. “U-um...thanks for the…”

He looked at me for awhile to the point where I got a bit uncomfortable before kissing me on the cheek. “It's whatever. Go sit down.”

I touched the warm spot of my cheek where his lips had been and scurried away trying not to show my giddiness. Why was I acting so stupid over him? I plopped down at a table, sighing to myself as the others ordered and waited for the drinks. It was only a few more minutes before Johnny joined me, sliding the cup and big straw my way. We stood quiet as we stabbed our straws into the plastic, sipping slowly and glancing at our phones. I didn't know how to talk to him about normal stuff really and was sure I was going to continuously make a fool out of myself.

“So….what's your favorite color?”

He looked at me questioningly. “What?”

“Your favorite color...sorry, i'm just trying to make conversation.”

“Oh...blue. What's yours? Black?” He chuckled then took a sip of his tea.

“Pastel pink.”

He choked a bit then chewed through the pearls. “Wait, seriously?”

“Yes, why is that hard to believe? I happen to be a multifaceted person that likes a bunch of things. I like cute things, video games, anime, comics, a whole bunch of nerd crap. I'm not just a stereotype.”

“Well, do you still think I'm a stereotype?”

I sucked in air through my teeth before propping my chin in the palm of my hand. “Sometimes you can be. You're stubborn and hard headed and a jerk most of the time but sometimes you can be….cute.” I diverted my attention to my drink again, hoping that my compliment didn't make things more awkward.

“What's so cute about me?” He asked. His eyes were focused right on me now as if he truly wanted to know.

“Oh well...physically of personality wise?”

“You tell me, princess.”

I pouted at my title. I guess he was returning my tease from earlier. “Well, i like that you trust me. I like that you're willing to try things with me. I think your photography is nice and i’m glad you have a passion. I think that it's cute when you spoon me or hold my pinky like you do.”

His face brightened to a heavy rose color and he straightened up as soon as Jae and Quinn came to the table. Jae tossed the car keys onto the table and sat down beside Quinn, rather than across from one another like Johnny and I were. They barely seemed to pay attention to us or their drinks and instead got wrapped up in their own little world full of intense kisses. Johnny and I face palmed at the same time.

“Were in public.” I groaned. “Cut it out.”

“Don't ruin our fun just because you two are weird and awkward.” Jae said.

“If ya'll were just gonna make out why did we even come out here? I could've stayed home.” Johnny interjected.

“I still wanted bubble tea. And we can get food later. I'm just a bit preoccupied now.” Quinn said.

I rolled my eyes and diverted my attention back to my phone which was a better sight than our best friends sucking the soul out of one another.

Im ready to die why are they like this

I texted Johnny.

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: we should just ditch them tbh

Omg, we cant. They rode with us. How would they get back?

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: who cares lmao

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: they can figure it out later

Be nice. Theyre still our friends

But would you care if I got some food after this? Im starving

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: fuck yeah. Where do you wanna go babe?

I smiled and looked up at him. He glanced up at me and returned my smile before nodding back at his phone, waiting for me to answer. Somehow texting made the both of us more comfortable than talking face to face. Blame it on on our generations addiction to technology or rather our crippling social anxiety.

Not to be weeb trash but there’s a japanese book store around here and it’s over by a bakery and a restaurant. I go there all the time. They have the best fried chicken

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: lets do it then

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: btw i watched naruto so i know anime

I couldn’t help the snort that got coupled with my laughter. I covered my mouth when i noticed the gross sound which made Johnny laugh too.

Oh my god, stop right there. I can’t believe you just said that!!!

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: I still remember like half of the opening songs

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: dont make me serenade you

There is nothing more I want in this world than you to sing fighting dreamers while squawking like a parrot

Literally nothing would turn me on more johnathan

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: lol, bet. You’re gonna get just that tonight

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: also you know my name is just john right lol

Not anymore. You’re forever johnathan

😂😂😂😂😂

Johnathan’s cute. I like johnathan

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: i like johnny. I have like 4 different names and thats the least fucking complicated one

I know what you mean, i have too many names too and I hate all of them.

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: there’s more than just Eri?

Way more unfortunately. My 1st name has 12 letters in it

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: wtf lol

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: what is it?

Never telling. Ever. its a dead name to me. Im just eri

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: boooo ur no fun

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: i’ll tell you my korean name if you tell me your full name

Absolutely not. If i tell you i’ll have to kill you. Thats the rule

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: does quinn know it?

Don’t bring them into this. Quinn knows a lot of things about me that must never be spoken of

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: ahh so you ARE a serial killer then

Shhhhhhh dont let anyone know.

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: i dont think i can hide the fact that youre a serial killer eri lol

I can hide you

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: why do I have a weird feeling that was your attempt at flirting with me

Please ignore me i dont know how to have actual normal conversations

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: apparently we can only have them about traumatic experiences and kinks

Thats basically the basis of a successful relationship duh

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: relationship?

You know what i mean

💕💕Big Dick Daddy💕💕: do i?

I looked up at him as he was casually sipping and waiting for my response. Before i could say something or even think of what to say, the chair screeched back and Quinn stood up suddenly. “I'm gonna go to the bathroom, i'll be right back.” They announced.

I shrugged. “Oh...alright. We'll be here.” I watched them walk off towards the restrooms in the back of the cafe and saw that Jae was doing the same.

“I gotta piss too..” He left then too, following Quinn in a half jog, and i wanted to scream. Really? Right now? Right in front of my boba? I rolled my eyes and sighed.

“They're going to go fuck.” I said, when he was out of ear shot.

Johnny looked back at the direction of the bathrooms then back at me. “Time to get food then.” He stood up and grabbed the keys from the center of the table. “Come on.”

“Wait, no we really shouldn't!” I protested. “I'd feel bad if we left them here.”

“Do you feel bad that they ditched us to fuck in the bathroom?”

“Well….maybe not so much.”

“Than come on.”

I grabbed my drink and followed after Johnny as he headed back to the car. We got in and I directed him to the bookstore, our conversation still at a minimum. After we arrived, he resumed holding my pinky and following me as i strung him along to look at stationery and the large collection of manga on the upper floor. I wanted to buy everything and practically cried when I saw my fave series or even a figure that i was desperate to have. Johnny seemed to get a kick out of every time I geeked out and listened patiently when I explained something to him like an overly excited teenager. He even told me about some of the anime’s he used to watch as a kid, a few we had in common.

I took him down another row of filled shelves looking for a specific title I had in mind. This section was only filled with the Japanese prints making Johnny question my intentions. "You can't read Japanese. Don't they have English ones?"

"Mhm," i nodded as i bent over slightly searching for the right volume. "It's for Yuta. He's collecting My Hero Academia right now. I wanted to see if they had the next volume he needs."

"Hm." He scoffed. "Yuta."

"There's nothing wrong with looking for something for a friend."

"Never said there was. It's whatever."

I finally found the volume and snapped a quick picture of it to send to Yuta and asked him to come back down here when he had time. I started searching for another series he had in mind of starting when i felt something creep up my thigh. Johnny was behind me now, his fingers just barely under my skirt and rubbing across the band of my thigh highs. I straightened up and swatted at him. "Quit being a perv!" He smirked and set a kiss on my lips holding it long enough for me to worry about our PDA. "Dont make us like Quinn and Jae!" I whispered harshly.

"Sorry, i won't. I just needed it."

"Needed a kiss?"

He shrugged and kissed me again, this time quicker before he moved away from me and disappeared to another aisle leaving me to stay flustered. I grumbled and switched to find the English volumes of the manga section but got distracted by a rack of Rilakkuma plushies. The adorable teddy bear was one of my vices and I had spent more than I needed too on a few of the plushies here. There was one in particular that I didn't have that shone like a beacon of light in the sea of others. I crushed the plushie to my chest, happy at how soft and perfectly squishable it was. I looked at the price tag and winced, setting my dream plush down and retreating to the manga which i could afford.

I wasted almost a half hour mulling over which series I should buy- one i was close to finishing or another I had always wanted to collect. I sighed and picked the cheaper option, which still made me happy. I needed a new job asap but it was slim pickings in this stupid college town and the surrounding areas. I was flipping through the volume in my hand when Johnny appeared beside me, startling me.

"Hey, not to be a buzzkill but I'm hungry as fuck. Would you care if we went to go eat now?"

"Oh yeah! Sorry, i was reading through some of the volumes and got distracted with deciding what I wanted. We can go." I noticed he had a bag in his hand as he had apparently bought something. "Found something you liked?"

He simply nodded and i tried to sneak a peek to see what it was. He yanked the bag away and held it high above his head where he knew he couldn't reach. "Don't be nosey. Go pay for your stuff." He kissed the top of my head and I pouted before walking to the register and paying. The restaurant wasn't too far from the bookstore so we took the scenic route, walking hand in hand. I loved the way his fingers engulfed mine and made my entire hand disappear. I gave him a few squeezes to guide him in a new direction until we arrived. I pulled the door open for us and kept our hands entwined as we went to the line to order again.

Almost a half hour later we were still eating and actually laughing and having a flowing conversation. His laugh was so charmingly awkward that it resembled music to my ears. I could listen to him talk all day when he was passionate about something, his little lisp becoming more adorable to me by the second. I watched every motion his mouth made, falling into my secret oral fixation and noticing everything i found attractive- his overbite, his lisp again, his tongue reaching out to lick his lips, the small hiss he made as he sucked in air through his teeth when he was trying to think of something, and every once in awhile when he would sink his teeth into his bottom lip. He quirked an eyebrow at me, stopping mid sentence.

"What are you looking at?"

I snapped myself out of my daydream like state. "N-nothing, i'm just listening to you."

"I feel like you're staring, you weirdo." He chucked the balled up straw wrapper at me and i returned with my napkin ammo.

"I was not staring! I was just interested in what you were saying but now you're just being a jerk."

"I am not, whiny princess. I could just tell. Do i have something stuck in my teeth? Sauce on my face?"

I shook my head. "Nope, you're all clean."

He nudged his foot against my leg from beneath the table. "Then tell meeee."

"You'll laugh at me!"

"I'll always laugh at you but it's all in good fun."

I sighed and set my hands on my forehead, making a visor of my fingers and trying to block him from looking at me directly. "It's just a thing i have with mouths, ok?"

"Fuck, was i chewing too loud or something?"

I shook my head. "No it wasn't really when you were eating food it was more like when you were talking and stuff. It's just...a thing I have."

"I don't get it…"

"It's like a….like a fixation, ok? Can we move on before i embarrass myself more?"

"Fixation? Is this like a kink thing again?" He asked.

"No...a little. But not really I suppose. Just stuff I find attractive that draws me in i guess."

"So you just like notice stuff I do with my mouth?"

I set my head on the table wondering why i couldn't be a normal human being who didn't make a fool of themselves when they were with a boy they liked (read: loved). "Y-yeah…"

"So what did you notice, i'm curious. Is this more stuff that you think is cute about me? Hmm?"

"Yes...for the most part."

"Then tell me."

I sighed again and kept my voice low. "I watched you chew on your fork while you were talking. And i like your lisp."

"Please no."

I looked up at him and he was covering his mouth instantly. Great. Now i freaked him out for good. "'M sorry." I grumbled.

"I hate my lisp, it's the worst. Why do you even think it's cute?"

I shrugged. "I dont know. Maybe because i think you're cute. Maybe because i like how it adds to your accent. Maybe i'm just extra weird."

"You're the first person to ever tell me that, you know."

"I figured as much. I don't mention it often because it weirds people out. So, again, i'm sorry."

He chucked the napkin back at me making me look up at him. "What you think is weird is your normal. And hell yeah i think you're weird but you're interesting too. You keep me guessing and I never have any idea what you’re gonna say or make me feel next.” Johnny looked down at the small amount of food he had left and poked at it with his fork, taking his turn to avoid looking at me.

“Correct me if i’m wrong but are you being nice to me, Johnathan?”

“Don’t be gross.” He laughed. “You’re cute too, i guess.”

“Thanks, i’m flattered.” I rolled my eyes playfully and stood up. “I’ll be back, I’m gonna use the bathroom.”

“Sure, you don’t want me to come with you?” He joked.

“Please don’t. I actually have to pee.” I nudged his head as I walked by him and headed towards the bathroom. I checked my phone to see if Quinn had texted me or noticed that we were gone. There was nothing but an excited text from Yuta along with a kissy face selfie. I responded to him and finished up quickly before returning back to the table. I stopped when I was about to sit down as i was face to face with the Rilakkuma plush I had wanted back at the bookstore. “What did you do?”

Johnny shrugged. “I saw you looking at it so...i don’t know. I thought you might want it.”

“You...you didn’t have to…” I whispered. I was practically speechless and couldn’t even move. I just kept staring at it. I had never once expected him to do anything like this for me. This made everything absolutely worse. Not only did I have feelings for him but now he was being adorable and sweet and thoughtful. What a fuckin’ asshole! This was the last thing I needed from someone who only saw me as a fuck buddy. It was also going to mess with my head and my heart more and I was a total glutton for punishment. What the hell was I going to do with myself?

“Do you like it? You’re looking at it like it’s a bomb.”

I finally sat down and swiftly took the plush off the table and held it in my lap. “Thank you.”

“It’s not problem. I got a keychain too. One where he’s sleeping.”

“You got a Rilakkuma keychain?” I asked, stunned.

He unclipped it from his belt loop and held it up for me to see. “Yeah, why not? I liked it.”

“I just...didn’t peg you for a guy that would buy a stuffed animal for himself.”

“It kinda reminds me of you.”

We both looked at each other not sure of what had transpired. We were frozen in place and I could almost hear my heart thundering between my ears. I squeezed onto one of the plush ears trying to stabilize my anxious thoughts. Johnny swallowed hard and opened his mouth as if he was going to say something but a loud vibration of his phone on the table scared us both. I saw that it was Jae calling and Johnny picked it up.

“Dude, where the fuck are you!?’ I could hear him yelling through the phone.

“We left. We weren’t going to wait for you two to finish fucking and being gross.”

“Come back here and get us!”

“No way. You guys can find your own way home. Eri and I are going back to her place and then we’re gonna fuck.”

“Shut up!” I whispered harshly. “We can just go pick them up. It’s not big deal.”

Johnny shook his head at me, holding the phone a bit aways from his ear as Jae continued to yell. “No way in hell.” He mouthed at me.

I kicked at him under the table and gave him a stern look. “Go back.”

“They don’t deserve it.” Johnny hung up on his best friend and got up from the table. “C’mon. Let’s get going.” He grabbed our trays and tossed the garbage in the trash while i gathered my plush and purse.

“You’re ridiculous, you know that? We’re never going to hear the end of it.”

“And? It’s time for us to have our own fun now. Don’t worry about them.” He pulled me close to him and kissed me. “You ready?”

I knew it was wrong to leave Quinn and Jae behind butttt a part of me was still annoyed that they ditched us to go fuck. At least Johnny and I were going to hook up in the sanctity of my apartment and not in the middle of hanging out with friends. Besides, I did want to spend some alone time with him now. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to have some fun of our own. “Yeah, I’m ready Johnny.”

“Jesus, it's cold in here!” I said as i opened the door to my apartment. “I'm gonna get a blanket for us if you wanna find something to watch.”

“Sure.” Johnny shrugged and kicked off his shoes as he sat down on the couch. I went to my room and tossed my purse and plush on my bed before gathering my fleece blanket. I nudged my own shoes off and made my way back to the couch, barely being able to see with the blanket balled up in my face. Just as i was hoping that i wouldn't trip, my foot caught onto Johnny's vans and i almost landed face first on the floor. He caught me instantly though and I was plenty grateful. Knowing my luck i would’ve slammed my head on the side of the coffee table. “And you think I’m clumsy.”

“Shush!” I said, pawing at his hands on my waist. “You shouldn't have left your clown shoes in the way!” He forced me to face him, my body poised between his legs and hands firmly on my hips. “What?”

He remained silent and gently eased me forward as he relaxed back into the couch. I got the message and crawled into his lap, straddling him. His lips busied themselves with pressing tender kisses to my neck while his hands crawled along my thighs. The gentle actions were enough to make me shiver just a bit. I pushed his hair back gently and took his wire frames between my fingers, pulling them away from his face. He blinked a few times as if his eyes had to readjust. I reclined back to set them onto the coffee table before returning my attention to him. “Well…” I began. “Here we are.”

“I've been wanting to fuck you all day you know that?”

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, i get it. The thigh highs. You're a slut.” I pouted. “I kinda...maybe…” I lowered my voice to just above a whisper. “I didn't mind hanging out with you today. I had a really nice time.” I was already kicking myself but i couldn't bare to hide my disappointment of my own true feelings. I did have fun with him. He made me laugh, genuinely laugh, and feel good. And the Rilakkuma he bought me would be something I cherished for a long time. I liked our date but I couldn't ask him out again, especially if he just wanted to fuck. Of course, that was my intention at the beginning as well but as usual I got caught up in trivial things that made me feel like I was actually important to someone.

“O-oh…” he said as if he wasn't even sure how to respond. I kept my gaze casted downward as my fingers twiddled away at a stray thread hanging from his shirt. “I mean...it was like cool and all I guess.”

He guessed. It stung. It really did. Even after the hand holding, kissing, and buying me things I was still nothing. But at least I knew what i was good for with him. “Yeah...Do you wanna….just get to watching stuff?”

He set his curled index finger beneath my chin and raised my head. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing's wrong, I'm fine.” I pushed his hand away and went to crawl off his lap but he instantly seized my waist again.

“Eri.” I hated the way his voice sounded when he was stern and reprimanding. It made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end and had my whole body melting into gooey mess.

“What?” I grunted.

“Tell me.”

“It’s nothing! I just thought you-it's stupid just forget about it.”

“Eri.” There it was again. Still after all these months his voice still drew me back in. I rolled my eyes and practically whined, despising that he was trying to make me talk about how i felt when he was the king of emotional suppression. It just wasn’t fair.

I tugged on the loose thread again, pulling it from the shirt completely. “I thought maybe you would've liked our date...the hang out thing I mean.”

“What makes you think i didn't?”

“You just said ‘it was cool and all i guess’. It sounds like you didn’t give a shit about it at all…”

“You want me to care about a date?”

“Yes! Wait, no! No, i do not.”

He raised a brow and squinted his eyes in confusion. “You don't?”

“I just- will you let me go? I don’t wanna talk about this anymore. Let's just fuck and get it over with.” I tried prying at his hands but he still wouldn't let me go, even when I started squirming.

“Eri.”

“Stop saying my name like that!” I snapped. I was failing at making it look like he wasn’t capable of making me lose my sanity.

“Say it like what?”

“Like all….UGH! You're frustrating!”

“I think you're frustrating yourself.” He chuckled which made my entire face heat up.

“I am not! I don't care if you don't care about the date but was it even a date like i had a really good time but you didn't and now i feel all weird and i don't wanna feel weird but i do and you're just here just not caring and i don't know! Ok?! I don't know!” I rambled in one breath.

“Shut up, you idiot.” He cupped my face in his hands, practically engulfing my entire head before pulling me to his lips. He was right of course. I was frustrating myself and letting my emotions mix with my anxiety to create this brutal concoction of frustration and confusion. I wanted to push him away so i could breathe and probably run away yet he was taking his sweet time as if he needed every caress of my lips. “I did have a good time.” He licked at the soft fullness of them before landing another kiss “A really good time. Why are you worried that I didn't?”

“Fuck if i know.” I whimpered. “You're fucking with my head.”

“Welcome to my world.” He pushed my hair away from my neck and planted kisses along my jugular. “Also do you not like it when i say your name?” His breath was dangerously close to my ear, his words a whisper that made my fingers dig into his shoulders harder.

“You were saying it all...harsh and commanding.”

“Did it scare you? I didn't mean to.”

I shook my head. “N-no. It um...actually turned me on.”

“Oh.” He pulled away from me. “Is it...like part of the daddy thing? Am i doing a good job? I really didn't notice.” He was blushing now but a small smile was creeping onto his lips as if he was proud of himself.

I returned the smile, my head feeling just a bit clearer. My ability to overthink everything was annoying when it swallowed my entire thought process. But his words were comforting enough to encourage me to breath and relax against him. “Yeah, you did a good job. You know you're kind of already a bit dominant right?”

“Uh really? I just thought I was being normal.”

“Remember your normal isn't the same as everyone else's. You just didn't notice or it seemed natural to you. It works. I also kinda like how growly you get.”

“Growly? I notice i do do that sometimes. I d-dont really mean to…” he said softly.

“Do it more often. Like a lot more often but don't force it. I like it when you do it when you’re fucking me from behind.”

“Wow uh, well ok.” He laughed nervously and darted his eyes away from me. “I will um...try and keep that in mind. For next time.”

“Now, you mean?” I set my hands on his chest and rubbed at the firm muscles beneath his shirt.

“Well...y-yeah, i guess.”

“It was your idea. Thigh highs remember.”

His gaze went back to my thighs instantly. “How could i fucking forget.” He slid his hands under my skirt and grabbed at my ass roughly. “What else do you have underneath here?”

“Do you think i'm going to show you that easily?” I smirked.

“You will. Get up.”

I ignored him and instead buried my face in his neck to give him small bites and licks. He didn't seemed too pleased with that as he landed a harsh smack to my ass, making me hiss. "F-fuck...jerk."

"Get up, Eri."

I shimmed off him and stood between his legs as he resumed his reclined position and rested his arms across the back of the couch. Slowly, i unzipped the back of my skirt, pulling away the suspenders and letting it fall to the floor. I pulled my shirt over my head, adjusting my hair once it was free and let him drink in the small fitting lingerie set. His eyes widened and his adam's apple bobbed within the tightness of his throat.

"What?" I started covering myself, suddenly becoming self conscious.

"W-wow…" was all he said.

"Wow, what?"

"Sorry, you just look…" he licked his lips and opened his legs a little wider. "You look hot."

"O-oh...” Was all I really managed to say. He took my hips in his hands again, pulling me gently to sit on the couch beside him. He caressed every inch of me while his lips crept closer to mine until they melted together. I trailed my hands beneath his shirt rubbing the softness of his stomach and begging to get it off so I could drink in his perfect body. Instead, he ignored my prying hands and pushed me down gently. I slipped one of the pillows that always resided on the couch behind my head while Johnny settled himself between my thighs. He focused his attention in trailing hot open mouth kisses and bites over my chest and winding down my stomach. Every bite was coupled with a soothing lick and a small whimper from me. I edged my hips up towards his mouth wanting him to mark my favorite spots. He dodged pleasing the place I wanted the most and grabbed a hold of my right thigh. He lifted my leg up to meet his lips and spent minutes on end kissing and rubbing every inch of it. I relaxed into his touches, feeling myself heat up at all the attention. “If this is how you’re gonna act every time I wear thigh highs then I’ll wear them more often.” I teased.

His eyes flickered up towards me but he remained silent. His lips went back to my inner thigh, kissing down to hover over my center, his bangs gently masking his face. I nibbled my lip nervously, wondering exactly what he was thinking and planning. The kiss was swift, pressed just above my clit and gone in an instant. I didn't ask him for more. That little act was enough progress for him and I couldn't help but feel a little bit proud. I smiled as I petted his hair back, whispering praises about how good he was making me feel. Again, he said nothing, seeming to be completely focused on giving the same attention to my left leg. His fingers danced across the soft fabric on my calf as his lips remained heated and eager. When he reached my ankle, he sat back on his knees and I heard the soft zip of his pants coming undone. He pulled off his button up, followed by his undershirt, yanking it up by the the collar and leaving them both by his shoes.

I pulled him close to me so we were flush together and wasted no time feeling the strong muscles in his arms. We locked eyes for a moment, smiling at one another before diving head first into another heated session of push and pull of our tongues. His hand rested over my neck, alternating between adding and releasing pressure while his hips ground into my budding wetness. I squeezed my legs around him, finding it a bit difficult to work around the minimal space we had on the couch. He didn't seem to care though and he was perfectly content with keeping his big body against me. I took in every degree of his warmth, grateful as i was about to be stark naked in a cold apartment.

"Take them off." I whispered between a kiss and suck to my tongue. I pulled at the nearest belt loop my fingers could reach. He let out a breathy sigh and worked them off. I could already see how filled out his boxer briefs were. The fabric was straining around him, barely keeping him in place. "Did my thigh highs turn you on that much?"

He didn't answer and instead buried his face in my neck while his hands worked my panties down around my ankles. After, he pulled my hand between us, setting it over his hardness. His breath cradled my ear in a plea. "Touch me." He whispered. My free hand dug into his hair while the other pulled the waistband down and set him free. He seemed thankful to finally get a bit of relief and the beautiful moan that he let out when i wrapped my hand around him was enough to almost make me cum right there. I shuddered a bit as that noise tickled my nerves and sent me into a fit of desperate hormones ready to take in every single inch of him.

He was already leaking so much that i could coat his sensitive skin with smooth glides and gentle squeezes. His teeth sunk into my collarbone, pinching my skin between the perfect rows and adding tenderness to the area. I flexed my fingers around his head, focusing rough pulls there as he started rutting his hips. He matched my pumps almost perfectly, shuddering curse words and vocal approvals into my skin. I eased his cock closer and he shifted his hips to press against my lower lips. My eyes fluttered closed as he rocked himself through my slickness. I circled my hips each time the tip of his cock flowed over my clit and ignited my lustful greed for him. A stiffer groan bubbled in his throat as he grabbed my hips firmly, keeping me steady so he could control all the movements. That small bit of control made me squirm beneath him, impatiently wanting to feel more of his fire fueled veins ride through my lips.

My thighs trembled ever so slightly, feeling the ridge of his head tease my clit once more. I let out a small mewl and felt as the mellow rocks of his hips slowed so he could press himself against my entrance. “W-wait, Johnny.” I pleaded.

“Hm?” He stopped entirely, waiting for me.

“We should use a...ya know.”

“What for? We’ve already done it without one.”

“Yeah but I don’t want to make a habit out of it. I’d rather be safe than sorry, ok?”

He sighed and bowed his head before getting up from the couch. “They’re in that box still, right?”

“Yeah.” I said softly. He wasn’t going to guilt me into fucking him again without a condom. I didn’t play that, no matter how good it felt only a week ago (or how much I kept thinking about it for that matter). While I waited for him to return I slipped my hand between my thighs, coating myself in my wetness and pressing two fingers inside. I sighed softly and closed my eyes, concentrating on the self pleasure. A few moments later, I felt the couch dip again and heard him chuckle lowly.

"Please. Don't let me interrupt." He kissed my knee and kept my thighs wide open to enjoy the view. I adjusted myself a bit lower on the couch and added a third finger before stretching myself open for him to see. I moved my fingers up towards my clit adding a few circles against it that made my back arch. I felt Johnny hover over me, taking my chin in his hand and making me face him. "You're not gonna cum like that."

"I know i'm not." I smirked and set my cum coated fingers in my mouth, enjoying the way his eyes widened and pupils dilated at the sight. I grabbed his ass, pulling him to me again before forcing myself down onto his length. He pressed me wide open, stretching me and filling me perfectly. His bottom lip was caught in his teeth and he moved my legs to rest on his shoulders. I had no idea what possessed him with the thought that I was some sort of contortionist pretzel but as soon as i felt him hit deep within me my eyes fluttered closed once more and i clutched onto his arms. I could barely handle it. Every move he made was absolutely flawless and heavy with lust that it made me moan more than i'd ever done before.

My breath was barely existent and he took the opportunity to capture me in another kiss, digging his fingers into my hair to keep me close. He seemed different somehow. More attentive, more touchy, more focused on us. It was like he wanted to spend hours within me and torturing me with orgasm after orgasm. He began rolling his hips, my calves jerking and toes curling around his head. I whispered his name against his lips, a scarcely audible beg for him to never stop. The sensation was so overwhelming i could feel tears edging to my waterline.

"You feel so fucking amazing, Eri." He said as his brows furrowed and sweat beaded across his temples. My body warmed at his praise, rolling against him to beg for more for more and clawing at the back of the couch. "C-can i try something?"

I raised a brow, confused at the timing of his sudden question. "H-huh? What? I don’t want you to stop, please."

"No, i know, me either but...i thought you might like this." He removed his arms from keeping himself propped above me and instead clamped one around my throat and the other over my mouth. He dug his fingers into my neck sending a shock wave to my system. My eyes widened as I never excepted him to get so into choking me. I was sure that he was still tentative to the whole action but the fact that he was doing this for me made my heart flutter with the prospect of love once more. "Is this ok?"

I nodded eagerly, tapping at his hips to remind him to keep fucking me as he took every breath from my lungs. My head dove into a fuzzing space of semi consciousness and pleasure, drowning in my deprivation. My walls clenched tight, holding the pressure and sucking him in as if he could go any further within me. His entire frame shuddered and his palm pressed harder into me, sinking against my windpipe. I worked my hips back against him, a bit quicker as i needed the fast pace to add to my imminent orgasm. "Mo-more?" He asked softly, through his uneven breaths.

All i could do was nod again, helplessly, as my scream was blocked out by the hand over my mouth and he plowed into me relentlessly. I could barely keep my sanity let alone my orgasm at bay, especially when his movements were coupled with those deep groans he made. My lungs were aching at this point and my stomach tightened. Every muscle in my lower half tensed and just as I tapped his forearm to free myself from his restriction, my back arched and sent my body into a spasm. It was intense, definitely more intense than my previous orgasms with him and I gulped down heavy breaths just to keep myself from going dizzy. He pulled me into his arms, keeping me against his chest and cradling my head as if to steady me. "Ssh, i got you." He said.

The light above me was blinding and i blinked rapidly as another shock wave zipped through me from head to toe. He edged my legs down from his shoulders leaving me to finally relax a bit more. I clutched onto him and squeezed my eyes so tight i could see colors flashing in the darkness of my lids. It took another minute or two until i had calmed down enough, feeling like a bit of a fool for having to completely recover from an orgasm. I hid myself in his shoulder, hoping he wouldn't think it was weird. He kissed my neck, my cheek, then my temple, before pulling away so my chest could fully expand.

"Can you get on your knees for me?" He asked as he sat back again. I instantly looked down at his cock which seemed to be painfully swollen and throbbing just a tiny bit. I wanted to take care of him and slowly eased myself up into his favorite position. It wasn't easy, especially with my legs feeling like utter jello but i managed to get there. I gripped the armrest and spread my knees to the width of the couch cushion. He wrapped his arm around my waist and pressed into me, making me wince. He stopped and slowed a bit, giving time for my tender walls to readjust to his girth. My shoulders dipped and i bowed my head, panting as he worked my hips back against him. I shifted a bit until it felt comfortable again.

He slid his warm hands up my sides to between my shoulders, unclipping my bra and pulling it down towards my wrists. I flung it away and let him engulf my breast in his hands, kneading harshly and pressing his torso against me. He held onto me tight and forced brutal thrusts into me, barely allowing me to keep up. I was already becoming a giant mess of emotions and couldn't bare another breathtaking orgasm no matter how much I craved it. I curled my nails into the fabric of the couch as I felt his thumb rub over my nipple between rough gropes. I breathed out his name like a swear and dipped my stomach downwards, allowing him to nudge at the sensitive bundle of nerves only a few inches within me. Every once in awhile he would pop out completely, just to fuck me ever so slightly with his tip before crashing back in. That simplistic addition was practically making my eyes roll into the back of my head.

I could already feel myself tiptoeing on that fine line of a second orgasm but I was holding back as much as i could. With the way his muscles were flexing against me I could tell he was trying not to lose his cool just yet either but was very close to failing. "Johnny…" I mewled and wiggled my hips back against him, trying to coax him to spill into the condom. He growled low and deep within his throat, naturally and without thought, as I looked back to see him still in deep concentration. I bit my lip and smirked to myself over my favorite sound he made.

"OH MY GOD!"

My perfect fantasy world was ripped apart when my eyes flew open and i was staring directly at Quinn and Jae who had come in through the front door. I screamed and scrambled to get the discarded blanket from the floor and pull it to my chest. Johnny quickly pulled out and balled up his clothes to try and shield himself from view. "ERI! RIGHT ON THE COUCH?!"

I could tell my face was beat red and i had no idea what to even say. Jae was covering his eyes, avoiding us at all cost. "Dude, gross. Put some clothes on!"

"Shut up! You weren't supposed to be here!" Johnny yelled.

"THIS IS MY HOUSE TOO! FIRST YOU DITCH US AT THE BOBA PLACE AND NOW YOU’RE FUCKIN’ OUT IN THE OPEN?!” Quinn continued to yell.

“Excuse me! You guys were being gross and LEFT US to go fuck in the bathroom first! We had every right to leave you because we weren’t going to wait until ya’ll got your rocks off!” I yelled back.

“Can ya’ll like...leave? I don’t even want to sit on the couch now.” Jae said, peeking between his fingers.

“Fuck you, dude!” Johnny got up, still holding his clothes in front of him. “Fuckin’ idiots.” He turned and headed towards my room making Jae groan when he saw Johnny’s ass.

“Bro! Come onnnnnnnnnn! Gross!” He groaned.

“Well what the fuck do you want me to do, huh?! It’s kinda difficult to put skinny jeans on with a goddamn hard on!”

I got up as well, in no mood to continue to be in front of them and wanting to shrink away immediately. I wrapped the blanket around myself and sprinted to push Johnny into my room and slam the door shut. I threw myself face down on my bed and screamed into my pillow. “I want to fucking die!”

Johnny tossed his clothes to the floor and crawled in beside me, pulling my spare pillow over his face and groaning. “Why are they like this? Why do they always have to ruin everything, i swear to god!”

“Please put me out of my misery. I can’t believe Jae saw me naked. Not only naked but getting fucking plowed!”

“I swear if he mentions anything about the way you looked i’m decking him in the face.” Johnny snapped.

“Wait do you think i looked gross? Oh my god, i probably looked gross.”

“Why are you worrying what he thinks?!”

“Well, i mean- if i’m gonna be naked in front of someone I at least want to look good!” I buried my face deeper into the mattress, mumbling a “nevermind.” Johnny pulled the pillow off his face and sighed. He snapped off the condom, tossing it into the trash beside my desk as I finally pulled my face up from the mattress. He set the pillow under his head and stared at the ceiling a permanent scowl on his face. I inched my way closer and set my head on his chest, sighing deeply. “What are we going to do now?”

He set an arm behind his head and looked over at me. “I don’t know. I’m not going back out there. Maybe i’ll just nap or some shit.”

I bit my lip. “I mean...We could finish…”

“Are you really still worked up after getting embarrassed like that?"

"Well they're not gonna see us in here! And i'd rather not think about what Quinn is gonna say about seeing your whole ass when you go home and I have to face them."

He ran both if his hands over his face and groaned again. "Christ…"

"Besides they act like I've never done shit on the couch! I gave Lucas a blowjob there!"

Johnny glared at me before rolling over. "Seriously?"

"What?" I asked confused. "What happened?"

He adjusted himself as best he could and didn't say another word. I shook his shoulder gently. "Whaaaattt?" He still didn't say anything which made me pout. "Johnny, why are you being grumpy?"

He shrugged me off his shoulder but I set my head on it instead. "Daddyyyy, tell me." I rubbed his chest and slid my hand down his stomach.

"Dont even." He grumbled.

"Then tell me."

"I'm fine."

I kissed at his shoulder then moved to his neck. "Nah-uh. You got all grumpy all of a sudden and i need to know why." I tiptoed my fingers lower, trailing down his body hair to grip his base. He grunted and still tried to ignore me. I made a hard bite just beneath his jaw before grabbing a handful of his hair and pulling back harshly. He hissed and grabbed at my wrist. "Tell me." I commanded. His eyes turned into slits as he gave me a death glare before tackling me, however with my bed being so small, we completely rolled over and fell onto the floor with a hard thud. I landed on top of him, straddling his lap. We looked at each other and burst into laughter.

"We can't win, can we?" I giggled.

"I guess not." He smiled as he pulled me down onto his chest and kissed me, pushing my hair out of my face. "I took the condom off because I figured you wouldn't wanna keep going."

"Hmm, i could go all night with you." I gave him a kiss and he rose to prop himself of his elbows.

"Well damn, i'm all for that." He smirked.

I shimmied off him and grabbed another from my box, eager to get back into action. He got up from the floor and back onto the bed while i tore the wrapper open and got between his knees. "You know...it was really hot when you choked me like that."

"I could tell you really liked it. I thought you were having an exorcism with the way you came so hard."

I rolled my eyes and blushed. "Don't flatter yourself too much." I rolled the rubber onto him and pushed him down onto the bed. He dragged me with him, positioning me to be his little spoon and pulling my legs open. I bit my lip and hid shyly into my pillow as he guided himself back into me. He sighed softly against my heated skin and kept my leg secured in his arm. I encouraged his thrusts, grinding myself back against him while his other arm slipped under my head and crossed over my neck, crushing my throat once more. I gripped the blanket beneath me tight, trying to steady myself in any way possible. Johnny bit at the back of my neck, keeping his control over me. I let out a strangled whimper when his hips sped up, snapping harshly against my ass.

I gripped at his hand that rested by my propped up leg and carried his fingers to my wetness. I wanted attention to my excited bundle of nerves but instead I felt his middle finger press into me in conjunction with his cock. I arched against him as that little extra addition stretched me further than i thought I could ever go. My fingers flexed with tension, practically shaking as my mind went blank. I could barely make out his cocky strangled whispers as I slipped closer towards another orgasm. He was curling his finger as much as he could while digging deep to the hilt inside me. I was squirming desperately and clamping down around him. He moaned my name deeply after a hard clench, his cock throbbing with his release. As he filled me, he slipped his finger out and gently rubbed at my clit, adding to the sensitivity. His hold across my neck loosened and i laid my head back on his shoulder, feeding into the loving attention. He stayed within me, his warmth filling my lower half while my cum covered him completely with my second orgasm, slightly dripping down between my cheeks.

We laid together for awhile, not saying much while we recuperated our breaths. He set my leg down and instead wrapped his arm around my waist keeping his chest pressed against me. I sighed and joined my fingers with his, giving his hand a slight squeeze. He nuzzled the back of my neck and stayed like that, drifting into sleep. It took me a bit longer to try and rest and i found myself distracted by the Rilakkuma plush that had fallen to the floor. I stretched my arm all the way out, reaching for it while trying not to disturb Johnny too much. My fingertips just barely grabbed it by the ear and I pulled it close, snuggling it to my chest.

I felt happy, more so than I was used to and the fact that it was caused by Johnny scared me the most.

We had spent days texting each other, sending stupid memes, videos, and sweet good morning snapchats. He would occasionally send me short clips of him playing around on his keyboard which made me feel warm with hope that he was getting his creativity back. I dared to share videos of me practicing guitar but never me singing. I was always out of frame too as i was still too shy to show him all of me. Quinn would grill me every time i stopped whatever i was doing to answer him immediately. Those little messages were starting to carry a lot of weight and even more so when they turned into late night facetime sessions or the occasional phone sex. I had even saved a selfie of him as his contact photo that would pop up every time he called.

Our little bit of free time was spent together, watching shows on Netflix, episode by episode, or even having online Overwatch matches where we would curse each other out. I never wanted to be healer and he wouldn't cover me when i needed him most. It was a pain but still proved to be a good time and we almost always ended up laughing in the midst of battle. He was even patient with listening to some of my band recommendations though he still wasn't too keen on some of the heavier stuff I listened too. I appreciated him trying though. It would suck when we would have to work and couldn't pay attention to our phones to respond as much. Tonight was one of those nights. I knew he was closing at the cafe and i was eagerly waiting for his response for when we could hang out next. Somewhere around 10:30 i got a phone call from him instead.

"Heyyyyyy beauutifullll." He said with such saccharine sweetness i knew he was up to something.

"What do you want?" I said flatly, needing to get past his little cover up.

"So...remember like a week or so ago when we went to get Boba and left Jae and Quinn at the place?"

"Yes?"

"So….he kinda got back at me."

"What do you mean?"

I heard him sigh deeply. "So this morning he said something was wrong with his car and asked to borrow mine. He promised to take me to work and pick me up while he tried to figure out what was wrong. Well i've been trying for like over a half hour to call him and even tried Quinn but neither one of them are answering. And uh...this isn't my pay week so I'm broke as fuck and cant afford an uber. Sooo….would you be able to come pick me up?"

"See, i told you we should've gone back to get them! But noooo, you had to be so headass about it!"

"Yeah yeah! Save your 'i told you so's'. Can you just pick me up? Please? It's cold out here and I'm freezing my ass off. It's starting to snow."

I sucked my teeth. "Fine. You owe me."

"I'll steal you some cake pops and breakfast sandwiches tomorrow."

"Deal. Give me 10 minutes. I'll be there."

"Thanks, you're awesome."

"No shit." I smiled. "I'll see you."

He hummed a goodbye and we hung up. I pulled on my fleece lined sweatpants and my winter layers before trudging out to my car. There was only a thin layer of snow on the windshield so i thankfully didn't have to stand outside and dust it off. I cranked up the heat as soon as I got in and headed towards his job. It didn't take me long to see his dark figure in the stillness of the parking lot. He ran up to the car, his breath visible puffs and nose bright red.

"Fuck, it's cold! Thanks, babe." He climbed in and shut the door and I noticed he looked completely drained and tired. His dark circles were more prominent and his smile seemed a bit forced.

"Are you ok?" I asked, concerned.

"Huh? Yeah, i guess. Why?"

"You seem like you could pass out at any minute. Have you been getting enough sleep?"

He chuckled. "Uh, no. When do I ever? I'm running on coffee and energy drinks."

"That isn't good Johnny…" i set my hand over his. "You need a break."

"Yeah tell my bosses that. It ain't gonna happen, princess."

"Have you eaten?"

"Don't have money too. Too busy at work to eat either. I'll figure something out when i get home."

"Johnny, what the fuck." I sighed and put my car in reverse and backed out of the parking spot. "You're coming home with me." I switched into drive and headed back to my apartment.

"No offense, but i'm not particularly in the mood to fuck right now. I know, shocking, but my feet and back are killing me."

"I'm going to feed you and you're getting a bubble bath."

"A what? I don't take bubble baths. That's like...girl stuff…"

"I will slap you. Bubble baths aren't a gendered activity, idiot. Everyone needs to get clean." I rolled my eyes. "You're doing what I say and i'm not getting any back talk about it, got it?"

He put his hands up in mock defense. "Fine, fine. Whatever you say." He closed his eyes and rested his head back in the seat and I was sure he was dead asleep in seconds.

I took my time driving home, letting him enjoy his quick nap. I gently shook him awake when i pulled into my lot and he shuffled out of the car like a zombie, following me to my door. We tossed our coats and hats on the floor, not bothering to hang them up and set our wet shoes on the doormat. I went to work cooking pasta (the quickest and cheapest thing I had to fill him up) while he stretched out on the couch to fall asleep again. He woke up instantly once I held the steaming bowl of finished spaghetti by his face and devoured it like a ravenous dog, asking for seconds soon after. I filled up his bowl again and set some aside for me, eating much slower than he was.

"I'm gonna get the bath going for you, ok?" I said once I was done.

"I can just shower you know."

"Baths help relax your muscles. Didn't I say no back talk?"

He rolled his eyes and left me to my own devices. I made sure the water wasn't too boiling before adding a bath bomb and a ton of bubble bath soap, bath oil, and some epsom salt. I even tossed in some soap flower petals I had gotten from the local dollar store and always used when i took my baths. I lit the candle that stayed on the top of the toilet tank and surveyed my handiwork. It was about to be a fun time. "Johnny!" I called out to him. "It's ready!"

He came into the bathroom and took one look at the bath and almost walked out. "What the hell is all of this?"

"Clothes off. Get in."

"Eri, this is ridicu-"

I pulled at his shirt. "You smell like sweat and gross coffee. Naked. Now."

He pulled his shirt over his head and nudged his socks off with his toes. "Don't you think it's-"

"Pants. Lets go."

He pursed his lips and slid off his dress pants and underwear. "Alright, fine. I'll get in." He walked over to the tub as if it was going to attack him and dipped his foot in slowly. "You want me to boil in there?! Why is it so hot?"

I rolled my eyes at him acting like a baby and turned on the cold water to bring it to a better temperature for him. "Try that."

He dipped his foot in again and seemed satisfied with it. He slowly sunk down and settled as best as he could given his long limbs. He stood quiet for a second before looking up at me. "This is the shit."

"Oh my god. I told you! You're over here with your fragile masculinity about taking a bath. It's the best thing ever! Hashtag self care, homie."

"Get in here with me." He grinned.

"Oh, and where am i gonna fit when you take up the entire tub?"

"We'll figure it out, just come in here. The water's niceeeee."

"Yeah because i made it that way." I left the bathroom adding that i would return in a second. I went back to the kitchen and pulled out the last two beers I had, flicked off the caps and took it back to the bathroom.

"Helllll yeahhhh." Johnny perked up when he saw what i had in tow. I handed them over to him to hold while i discarded my clothes and maneuvered myself between his legs with plenty of difficulty. My tub wasn't made for a giant and me put together. Eventually we settled into a mostly comfortable position and i rested my head back against his chest, sipping at my beer. He seemed to be preoccupied by gathering suds in his hands and squishing the bubbles like a big kid. I took another sip and set the glass bottle onto the floor a little bit aways from the tub.

"You look like a toddler playing with the bubbles like that." I laughed.

"I'm just having fun. Besides, i can do this with them." He smooshed a handful of suds into the side of my face, catching me completely off guard.

"Oh you ass!" I wiped my face and flung the bubbles at him, getting it in his hair and face. He set his beer down beside mine and tried grabbing me, making water splash over the edge of the tub. I was a giggling fit as we tried to see who could cover who in the most bubbles. He splattered more into my hair though I was trying to block him as much as I could. I had closed my eyes for fear of getting soap in them and swatted at him until i felt him grabs my wrists and pull me close. We were still laughing out asses off until i wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him.

"Isn't this better than some boring shower?" I smiled.

"Yeah, everything's better with you...but i do actually have to get clean. My hair is greasy as fuck."

"Oh, hold on. I grabbed my shampoo from the corner of the tub and pumped some into my palms. I slathered it into his hair, pushing it back before dipping my hands in the water. I scratched at his scalp, rubbing the shampoo in and making sure any didn't get into his face. He didn't protest at all and instead leaned into my chest, letting me take care of the rest. I wiggled onto my knees to get better access to him and he of course took the opportunity to grabs my ass, laughing when he slapped it and made suds fly about. I smacked the back of his head playfully and demanded he stay still when my nails were digging into his scalp.

He kissed my chest and neck, promising he would be a 'good boy' and making me roll my eyes. Eventually, i grabbed the shower head and rinsed off his hair though he shook the water from it like a dog and doused me. I proceeded to force the shower spray in his face which only made him grab me again and practically dunk me into the water. He was barely relaxing but definitely smiling and having fun which i guess was still a win. When i slid back up he wiped the suds away from me and kissed me, keeping me cornered between the edge of the tub and his body. I smiled into the kiss and wrapped my arms around him again getting lost in my usual happy place.

We stayed like that until the water ran cold and made us shiver. I drained the tub and turned the shower on letting him fully wash up and get conditioner in his hair. There was a bit of a distraction when he was "helping me get clean" and his hands dove between my thighs. I almost fell for it because he always knew how to work me up in seconds but i was able to keep him at bay and make him rinse off. I stepped out the shower first, wrapping my hair in a towel and getting another for around my body. I padded out to the linen closet to get a spare and tossed it at him while he stood dripping in the tub. I went to my room to scope out some of Lucas' clothes that Johnny could wear for pajamas- well if he wanted to. He always did sleep naked. He came into the room a few minutes later, towel wrapped around his waist and still dripping just a bit.

"Did you actually want to sleep in clothes tonight? It is pretty cold." I asked.

"Yeah tha’ts fine….is that my hoodie?" He asked as he caught sight of his hoodie that rested over my desk chair. I had kept it since the night after the Halloween party.

"O-oh….yeah, uh… do you want to wear that?"

"I almost forgot you had it. It's like my favorite hoodie too." He grabbed it and briefly gave the hood a sniff. "Hm…"

"What?" I asked before pulling a pair of sweatpants out of the drawer for him.

"Nothing, it just smells like you now."

I raised a brow. "Uh...sorry?"

"Nah, its cool...how often were you wearing it?"

I didnt need him to know i slept with it on almost every night so i shrugged coolly. "Eh, once or twice. I didn’t really pay attention to it."

"Mhm." Was all he said before I handed him the sweatpants and he pulled them on. He crashed face down onto my bed, groaning happily as he finally got to lay down. I finished drying my hair, tying it up, and pulled on my comfy oversized pjs. I got in bed beside him and kissed at his bare shoulders.

"Do your muscles still hurt?" I asked.

"A little. Mostly my lower back. It was truck day so of course i had to get all the boxes of coffee and shit organized and lift every thing. I'm just ready to sleep."

I slipped over his hips and ran my hands over the small of his back. "Do you want a massage?"

He looked back at me. "What?"

"A massage. Like you know, to relieve some of the tension?"

"Oh...ok?"

"What? You never gotten one before?" I laughed at his incredulousness.

"Not really. I usually do it for girls to get them in the mood or whatever. Touch their tits."

"You're definitely the romantic." I shook my head and dug my palms into his lower back hearing a few vertebrae crack. He cursed softly and i felt his entire body relax beneath me. "There you go, dummy. That’s better."

I worked my hands over his muscles, sliding them across his shoulders and working my thumbs into the back of his neck. "Damn Eri, what did I do to deserve you?" He chuckled.

"I mean, i'm definitely the best you've ever had and the best you'll ever get." So why don't you ask me to be your girlfriend already?

He snorted. "Yeah, sure. I will say though that you've got the best ass and you're turning me into an ass man for sure."

"And a thigh man too."

"All of it." He smirked.

"Get into anal, then we'll talk." I cracked a bit more of of his spine before leaning down to kiss his cheek.

"Hm, doubt it." He closed his eyes and pulled my Rilakkuma plushie that had become my sleeping partner close to him. Why did he have to be so fucking cute? It was getting impossible to ignore my feelings for him no matter how hard i tried to suppress them. It was bad enough that he made me laugh and smile but we were actually getting along pretty well. He was starting to seem absolutely perfect and yet...he would never have feelings for me. I sighed internally as i slid off him and pressed myself into his back, becoming the big spoon. He didn't move or shrug me off so I assumed he didn't care. That or he was already passed out which seemed like the most logical explanation.

I pulled the covers over us and wrapped my arm tight around his waist. Eventually the stillness of the air around us and the calmness of his breathing got to me. Slowly, i started falling asleep, encased by his warmth and my feelings of never wanting him to let go.

Johnny's POV

I felt hands grabbing at me, clutching at my shoulders and chest. I tried to block them, shove them away. I pleaded for them not to touch me. I didn't need to feel used again. Or dirty. Or weak. I screamed then, burning my lungs as tears rolled down my face.

"JOHNNY! WAKE UP!"

The voice was different then what I was expecting and I opened my eyes to see her face full of worry with a red mark on her cheek. "E-Eri?" I could barely speak.

"I think you were having another night terror. I-i was trying wake you up but you kept fighting…"

"D-d-did I hit you?"

"I mean...i know it was an accident. You were in a state of panic." She dragged her thumb across my cheek and I could feel her wipe at the tears there. They hadn't stopped flowing and i realized how much of a fool I was. I never cried in front of anyone. I would never show that side to me. Not only had I told her my deepest secrets but she had watched me have not one but two night terrors. Now here I was crying-no, sobbing- like a little bitch. I had to leave. I shoved her away quickly, probably harder then i needed to and got up from the bed. I was in a rush to pull on my hoodie and get to the front door while she was calling out to me to slow down. I couldn't bare too.

I ran out of her room, wiping furiously at my face. I gathered my coat from the floor and shoved my feet into my work boots. Quinn was just coming through the door and stopped as she saw me. "Johnny? Are you ok?"

"Did Jae drop you off?! Is he still downstairs?!"

"Wh-what? Yeah. Did something happen between you and Eri?"

"Johnny!" I heard Eri cry out. I moved Quinn out of the way and took the stairs two at a time, calling out to Jae as another wave of tears threatened to push through. I threw the front door open and waved at him, his eyes widening as he sat in my car. I got in the passenger seat as fast as I could.

"Johnny, i can explain-"

"Drive!"

"What? What happened?"

"JUST DRIVE!"

"Fuck! Ok!" He hit reverse and backed out before speeding away from the apartment. "What's going on, bro?"

I covered my face with my hands and rested my elbows on my knees. "I can't do this anymore. They're getting worse. I cant fucking do this."

"What's getting worse? Did Eri do something to you? I'll turn this car around right now, i swear to god."

"No. No. Just go home. Please just take me home."

"You need to tell me what's happening. I mean it." He said, sternly.

"Not right now. Later. I can't...fuck, i can't…" i sniffled and rubbed at my eyes again, trying to make sure I didn't shed another tear. Jae didn't say anything after that but I could tell he wanted to. I just needed to know why I couldn’t get over this. It had been over a month since it initially happened but only a couple weeks since she had left me alone for good. I had spent so much time with Eri that I thought it would be over but she could only do so much. And now i had hit her, an accident, but it still brought me back to how I felt when the bruises were all that were left of Rixi’s torture. I pressed my head against the cold glass of the window and watched as the street lamps passed by.

"I really worry about you…" Jae said in Korean, which meant he was completely serious.

"Yoonoh, i said not now." I replied. My Korean wasn't the best of the best and my accent was complete shit compared to his but I could at least hold a conversation.

"I know not now, we don't have to get into it but i still wanted you to know. I'm here for you and if she so much as hurt you-"

"She didn't. Eri would never. I know she wouldn't. But...I just keep reliving what happened and can’t let it go. That's all."

"Maybe...you should try like therapy, man. They have those groups for survivors and-"

"I'm not a fuckin' charity case and i don't need therapy. I'm not gonna sit there being the only dude and get laughed at. I can deal with it on my own." I snapped.

"Can you? Because it doesn't seem like it." He said, softly.

"I don't even know anymore…"

He pulled up to our place and i walked ahead of him which was when i realized i had left everything in Eri's room. I sighed and set my head against the door wondering if Jae would go back and get my keys, wallet, and cell phone for me. I didn't want to face her. After all how did you face the person you had feelings for when you just cried right in front of them.

Eri's POV

He hadn't talked to me in a couple weeks again which was starting to become the most annoying and frustrating thing about him. Just when i thought i was breaking his walls down he would block me off again. It was like all those perfect moments we shared together meant nothing at all and we were back to square one- or square zero for that matter. I kept promising myself that no matter what Johnny did to try and weasel his way back into my life I wouldn't let him. I couldn't fix him, i couldn't stop his night terrors or anxiety, and I sure as hell couldn't get him to admit that he needed more help than i could give. It wasn't my job to build him back up even if i was okay helping him out a little. I still did care about him and didn't want him to suffer but I also had to move on for my sake.

However, the way I coped with everything was my favorite self destructive habit. The other lead singer of my band, André, had invited me over for a house party with some of the other people we normally played with at the club. Even a few of our friends who were on tour had come down to our shitty little college town to see us. It had been about a year since they had gone on tour and I was so damn happy to see them. Too many drinks later we were jumping on the couch and breaking shit, playing riff after riff on our guitars and laughing our asses off at stupid stories. I had no idea how many people I kissed or how many times someone asked me to hook up with them. Headbanging made me dizzy but i did it anyway. Hanging around a bunch of metalhead dudes was not the time to punk out. I stopped myself from puking a few times and managed to get a round of Three Amigos in; my specialty. One shot of Fireball, one shot of Honey Whiskey and a last shot of Bourbon.

That pushed me over the edge into bad decision territory. I stepped out of the apartment for a minute in a fit of drunken giggles. I unlocked my phone and trailed through my contact list ready to make a fool of myself. I dialed the number and waited. It only rang two times before he answered.

"Eri?" He sounded confused and a little bit sleepy. My sense of time was distorted.

"Heyyyyyy cutie. How's it going?" I giggled.

"Fuck, you're drunk."

"Absolutely not! I'm just a little tipsy, that's all baby, I swear."

"Yeah, no. You're drunk. I'm the last person you'd be calling."

"I miss your dick though. A lot. I think about it sometimes. It felt good. So good…"

His tone changed a bit, voice getting a little deeper. "Oh? Yeah? I guess I can admit I’ve thought about you a few times too."

"But you hate me!" I whined. "You're always so mean to me and you never talk to me!"

"I don't hate you I just hate the shit surrounding you is all. It's too much drama. I just want to fuck you without any problems."

"You can fuck me. Please fuck me."

"Eri…" I heard him sigh softly. "I can't, baby. You're drunk. That's literally illegal."

"Nooooo, no. I'm not I swear. Can I come over in a bit? Will you stay up for me? I'll make it worth your while."

"If you come over i'm just gonna have to babysit you and make sure you don't choke on your own vomit."

I let out a frustrated grunt, his name coming out short and snippy. "For the last time i'm not drunk. I want you to fuck me, ok? All these idiots at this party want me but I don't want any of them. I want you. I want you...all of you. For the rest of the night."

"Why do you do this? You're a heartbreaker and a fucking tease, you know that?"

"That's how I get them to keep coming back." I smirked. "Do you really not hate me? Like...for real."

"I meant what I said. I really don't hate you. I've thought about you more than enough. I've thought about when I was inside you, when we kissed, the way you looked at me when you came, how good you looked at the summer party. I've wanted you for awhile but never had the guts to say so, and always hated the shit you brought around."

"I'm a good girl, i swear. I won't cause any trouble. I really need you. Please?"

"Ok, ok...promise me you'll sober up first. And for the love of god don't drive. I'll call you an uber if you need one."

"Hmm, no. I'll be ok. I'll be there soon. Just be ready for me."

"You're a pain in the ass, i hope you know that."

"So are you, jerk." I giggled. "Bye." I hug up my phone, biting my lip as I was happy to get my hook up for the night. I missed him a little and needed to get my mind off of everything and he was the perfect distraction. Suddenly, the door swung open and my arm was grabbed.

"Why are you out here?! We need you to show Justin that he doesn't know shit about a good solo!" André said. "You need to kick his ass!"

"Ok! Ok! But only one. I've got to get somewhere after and sober up."

"Boooooo! That's boring! Where the hell do you need to go?"

"To get laid, duh! Where else would I go?"

"Oh great. Did Crystal call you up again? She was supposed to be coming soon." He said.

"Nah, not Crystal. An old flame. But tell her that she's more than welcome to get back in my bed and be tied up." I set my arm around his shoulder and lead him back into the apartment. "Now let's show that dumbass who's the head bitch in charge around here."

It was another hour or so before I left. I wanted to at least get some water in me before I headed over to his place. The snow on the ground had turned into slush as the past few days had been rainy. Tonight was barely any different. When I had gotten into the uber it was drizzling but as soon as I got to the apartment it had turned into a torrential downpour. The quick walk to the front door had me soaked in seconds and absolutely freezing. I knocked on the door fast hoping he was still up like he promised.

It took a minute but he opened the door. His eyes widened at my shivering state and pulled me in quickly. "Jesus, what happened to you?"

"It's p-pouring and like 30 degrees out. I'm f-fuck-fucking freezing."

He pushed the wet hair away from my face and cupped my face in his hands. I clutched onto his tank top, desperate for warmth and for his touch. He kissed my trembling lips and after such a long time of not being with him i realized exactly what made me hook up with him in the first place. He was always so attentive and ready to please me that it made my heart burst into a fast paced sprint. "Let's get you a hot shower, ok? Don't need you catching a cold, angel."

"Hmm, you know i'm far from an angel, but I will take the shower with you.” He closed the door as i took off my leather jacket and untied my combat boots, yanking them off and almost stumbling to the floor. He caught my shoulder and helped me straighten up.

"You good?"

I giggled. "Yeah, definitely." I took his hand and headed towards his bathroom. "C'mon Taeyong, I promised to make it worth your while didn't I?"

#Johnny Fanfic #JOHNNY SMUT #johnny suh #johnny seo #johnny fanfiction #nct 127 fanfic #johnny nct #nct 127 fanfiction #NCT 127 #NCT #nct 127 smut #nct sm au

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bitsandbobsandstuff · 6 years ago

Text

A love that never leaves (6)

Summary: Sometimes when you go looking for the past, you find things you never expected. When an accident brings him face to face with something he never knew he lost, Bucky Barnes begins to understand an age old truth – it’s so easy, sometimes, to love the things that destroy us.

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: Bad language. Buckets of fluff.

A/N: Bucky’s reaction to the story takes her by surprise, a poor old truck gets hot-wired, and Bucky uses an ax because if Steve can do it so can he. Here’s what happens after the reveal. After this chapter, things take a turn for the angsty (shocking I know), so please bathe in the fluff while it’s here.

Tags are open, if you want on the list please send me a DM or ASK, it’s easier for me to track. Otherwise you can find the new updates each weekend!

MASTERLIST ALTNL MASTERLIST

PREVIOUS CHAPTER

Previously...

Just like that, he offers his whole heart and she gives hers freely in return. Both know their world is dark and unforgiving, and this war could make liars of them both, but neither cares. To find love in this bleak life is a rare opportunity and the temptation is too strong.

Bucky kisses her one last time and rises to his feet. She watches him pause at her bedroom door to give one more crooked smile, and then the door is clicking shut and he’s gone. Alone again, she curls into a ball under the heavy blankets.

It’s hell, she thinks, to love a soldier.

Burying her face in the faded green pillow, her heartbroken tears fall fast and thick, soaking silently into the soft cotton.

*****

MISSION REPORT

LAST MISSION PARAMETERS RECALLED AND RE-ACTIVATED. APPROPRIATE TOOLS COMMANDEERED TO ADDRESS ISSUES AND SECURE ADDITIONAL SUPPORT. SECOND ATTEMPT AT CONTACT WILL BE UNDERTAKEN BEFORE PROCEEDING WITH FINAL PLAN.

He fingers the blunt edge of the tool. Scratches his temple with it and closes his eyes.

His whole body is shaking.

His whole body is sweating.

Now he digs that blunt metal into his temple until the skin splits. A thin line of blood follows the path of his jawline, dripping into his lap.

*****

Is it really any different than the morning he left? Orange flames dance in the fireplace, a comforting tune. The fire is soothing, but the silence is the opposite – thick, heavy, and colored with confusion.

Bucky sits in the armchair. Elbows propped up, one metal, one human, both digging painfully into his thighs, he keeps his face buried in his hands. There’s a dull throbbing in his head and for the first time he can remember, he has a fucking headache. The door in his head, the one that opens into the past when the memories come calling, is still shut tight. He can feel them behind it, pounding like a battering ram to break free, but nothing happens.

The door stays closed, the past stays hidden.

And he stays perfectly still.

The leather of her chair creaks as she rises to her feet, walking to the bookcase without a word. Dropping his hands, Bucky watches her select a fat novel from the bottom shelf. When she turns to face him, he sees her open it to reveal a hollow space - inside lies yet another small lockbox. Scrolling through the dial, she selects a series of numbers and it clicks open. Pulling free a thick packet of paper, she sets it gingerly on the coffee table and steps back to wait.

In front of him lies a pile of envelopes, cracked and yellowed with age. Raising wary eyes, he finds her watching at him, her posture rigid.

“I just threw everything at you. I’m sorry, Bucky. I don’t know what I thought would happen, maybe I should have told you in the beginning, but the last time we met you didn’t know, so I wasn’t sure at first and then I didn’t know how to say it and then time passed and it was so – it was nice to have you here and I didn’t want to freak you out and I know life is completely different now, neither of us are who we were during the war, you don’t – ” she breaks off, aware she’s rambling.

Shaking her head, she just stops. Stares beseechingly at him, waiting.

There’s his cue, the one telling him to speak.

He opens his mouth, but nothing comes. He closes it, staring at her. Then he tries again – but his voice is gone. Shaking his head, he looks back at the letters.

“Okay,” she whispers, and he hears a catch in her breath. “Okay. I don’t – expect anything. You don’t have to respond. I can just – give you some space.”

She walks to the front door of the cabin and gathers her coat from the rough wooden peg. Hand on the doorknob, she looks back once more to find him hunched immobile on the couch, staring at the pile of paper, and her shoulders fall.

Cold air breezes through the door and then it snicks shut. Like always, Bucky is left with nothing but the echoing silence of his thoughts.

Long moments pass before he reaches for the letters. A thin, dirty white string binds them together and it takes several tugs to release. The paper crackles warningly under his fingers, a result of old age and frequent readings, and he handles them gently. Selecting an envelope from the top, he opens it carefully, unfolding a delicate sheet of paper.

It’s like an electric shock, when he sees the writing.

Faded letters spill across the page, narrow words in a firm backhand slant that Bucky recognizes. So many things about him have changed over the years, but his handwriting was never one of them. Through the decades it’s remained the same, unalterable as the blue of his eyes and that small bit of constancy was a weird blessing to his fractured sanity.

One sweep of the letters and there’s no doubt in his mind. They’re from him. That fact is irrefutable.

His eyes scan down the page, picking out snippets of text. Occasional words and phrases are redacted, inked over in swipes of black where the US Army got exasperated hands on his stories, but most of it is there.

And there, in the warm little cabin, the truth of her memories shines like a beacon in the darkness of his past.

February 27, 1944

…so damn cold up here. I had ice in places I’d rather not say.

I swear to god, there’s nothing I’d like more right now than to be back in your arms. Can’t stop thinking about our last night – the boys are giving me hell every day, telling me to stop mooning around, but you make it real damn hard to think of anything else.

Sure as hell won’t say it in front of those idiots, but I got to thinking the other night and I don’t know what it is you bring out in me, but I figure you’ll indulge me getting all sappy for a minute. That morning we headed out, I left something pretty damn important behind - so I’m asking you to hold real tight to my heart darlin. You stole it fair and square that day we met, and I know there ain’t a safer place in the world than in your hands.

Stay warm and stay safe.

Love,

Jimmy

May 2, 1944

…and I don’t know if I’ve ever laughed so hard! We’d set up a row of bottles we found and were throwing Delilah around, trying to knock them off and G got a little cocky. Tried to throw it behind his back and it ricocheted off a god damn tree, hit him in the knees and knocked his legs out. He fell face first, got a mouthful of mud and I swear to god, we laughed for an hour. Every time I thought we were done, G got this look on his face, acting all high and mighty, and it set us off again. He recovered just fine, but his knees were bruised all black and purple. It’s good for him though, keeps him humble.

G says hello, by the way, and hopes you’re doing well.

And now the rest of them are hanging over my shoulder and asking if they can all come over someday and you can make them that potato soup you made for me, and I’m sorry, I promise I’ll find new friends when this damn war is over…

Love,

Jimmy

July 23, 1944

You know, the first thing I want to do when I get home, is go to one of those drive-in movie theaters. I don’t know if you’ve heard of them, they’re new in America, but it’s a real basic idea - there’s a big screen and you drive into a parking lot and watch a movie from the car. It sounds weird, but I went once and it was great. And good lord, the teenagers love it. They pretend to watch a movie and spend the entire time getting all frisky, and no one’s the wiser.

So, here’s what I’m thinking.

You. Me. A big box of popcorn and a couple bottles of Pepsi. It’s dark outside and once the movie starts, no one will pay us any attention. Maybe we watch the movie, or even better - maybe we don’t. I can’t think of anything I’d love more, than spending two straight hours kissing you. You’re already an addiction for me darlin, but add a little salt to your lips, and I don’t think you’ll ever get rid of me. We could steam up the windows, give those kids a run for their money. I can’t wait to show you.

You’re going to love it, I promise.

Love,

Jimmy

September 18, 1944

Morning Darlin,

I’m on watch and it’s early, suns not even up yet. Should be paying attention and I am (I swear!), but the stars are so damn bright and like everything beautiful in this world, they make me think of you. You know, I never understood how many stars there were until I got to Europe. Never saw much of anything growing up, the city lights were too much. Now though, I sit here, and there’s this – infinity, I guess – staring back at me and it makes me feel small. Like I’m this tiny thing in the universe and why the hell would the universe care about one more soldier with a busted conscience and too many kills to his name.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s okay, in the grand scheme of the world. I don’t need to be famous or remembered or anything. I’m okay being one of many, because there’s a big damn difference between me and every other schmuck out here sweating and humping through the mud.

That big difference is you. This thing we have, it keeps me going. Every damn day.

Your last letter came just when I needed it. Been real hard out here lately. More than it’s ever been. How the hell’s this thing not over? How’d the world get here? I don’t understand it. Never will. All I know, is that I’m so damn ready to hang up my gun and put this all behind me. No more killing, no more tramping through the rain and camping in the snow. No more sleeping with a gun in one hand a knife in the other. I know it does no good to complain and I don’t want to put it on you. Guess I’m just tired.

But you know, I’ve been thinking about the future lately. What life will mean when this thing ends, how we all move on. What happens next. Sometimes I can’t see much past the next mission, but god willing, I’ll see you soon. There’s something important I want to ask you and I need to see your face when I do.

Wish I was there with you.

All my love,

Jimmy

Bucky reads through 12 different letters. When he finishes, he starts back at the beginning and reads them all again.

These words, these promises - they turn him inside out.

On the surface, perhaps some of the words make no sense, but wartime correspondence is unique - no names, no locations, nothing permitted that could be an identifier if letters were intercepted by the enemy. So maybe Bucky doesn’t remember writing these specific letters, but history and common sense tell him enough.

Which is why certain things buried in those simple words are so important – they trigger the patchy album of memories Steve’s given back to him, and it all begins to make sense.

Particularly those names.

Delilah. During the war, it’s what the Howlies called Steve’s shield. Steve got all red and flustered when he grudgingly reminded Bucky, saying Dugan liked to joke it needed a pretty, fancy name, because ‘oh gee whiz boys, Captain Rogers is so pretty and fancy.’ Bucky still calls it that now and then, a muscle memory screech that bursts unconsciously forth when he’s diving to the ground, trying to avoid a vibranium concussion as Steve flings it around the room.

G. That must be Steve. It makes sense in the context. His middle name was Grant, and very few people would have known. It wasn’t released to the public until after his plane went down, so it would have been hard to decipher.

And god dammit all to hell. Jimmy.

Bucky Barnes was a blood-soaked legend throughout the European theatre, and his quirky name was instantly recognizable. But Jimmy - it was one of those silly things that popped up when half the Commando unit had the name James. A silly moniker, one only used for messages and mission reports.

Now here it is in another context. Exactly like Steve told him.

The strange thing though, is that even with these letters and her story and confirmation from Steve’s tales - there are still no memories of her that he can recall. Normally they come flooding back when someone hands him information like she’s done, but they’re still inaccessible in his brain and that fact sits bitter in his stomach. All he can claim are the tentative words offered from her heart, through these quiet recollections and worn handwriting scrawled across yellowed paper.

But the icy rock lodged in his gut begins to melt when it dawns on him.

Before everything, before he fell from that train, before his life crashed and burned, he had something. He had someone. He had a life and a future and a woman who loved him.

He was in love with someone.

His brain still refuses to show him the past, but his heart – that’s another matter. Like an iron fist, muscle memory grips him and the curtain lifts. It’s a god damn tragedy that he can’t remember her, that he can’t recall the feel of her lips or the scent of her skin or any of the words she must have gifted him in her letters. It’s a tragedy and he’ll never forgive himself, but in this moment, he realizes that it’s okay.

This is why his breath catches every time she smiles at him. This is why he felt his stomach plunge the first time she spoke. This is why her laugh sets his blood on fire.

Because his heart never forgot her. Not once, not for a single moment.

Against all odds, across the endless chasm of space and time, they found each other again. Maybe this is it. Maybe after all the shit he’s been dealt, Fate decided to lift her endless ban on allowing Bucky Barnes a measure of happiness.

Maybe Fate is giving them another chance.

Well if that’s the case, he’s sure as god damn hell not going to lose it.

“Shit,” he breathes, jumping to his feet. Flying to the door, he throws it open, panicked she’s somehow slipped away, disappeared and left him all alone.

And then he skids to a stop.

Wrapped in her fluffy winter coat, she sits huddled on the front steps. At the sound of the door, she stumbles to her feet and spins to face him. Her hands are clenched in tight fists at her side and there is such naked, desperate hope in her eyes. To be seen, to be loved.

To be remembered.

Bucky steps slowly onto the porch. Cautiously, as though he’s afraid she could shatter, he reaches for her. Burning hot palms lay gently on her frozen cheeks, wandering blue eyes search every inch of her face, and he hears her breath snap harshly.

He leans closer, lets gentle lips ghost over her forehead, over fluttering eyelids, over the tip of her nose, to the softness of her lips. Searching, searching, searching, searing the scent of her skin back into his brain. When he touches hesitant lips to hers, he feels her mouth open to him, and he drinks up her shaky breath with a contented sigh.

Pulling back, he looks into wide eyes brimming with fierce, terrified love. Without a second thought, he lays himself at her mercy and begs the forgiveness he should have requested decades ago.

“I’m here. I’m here now, and I’m so god damn sorry I took so long.” Rubbing his thumb lightly over her lips, he stares in wonder. His gaze roams hungrily over her face, drinking in the color of her eyes, the shape of her nose, the curve of her lips. Every detail he never knew he missed until suddenly he did. “I see you. I see all of you. Let me memorize it, I never want to forget again.”

In the next moment, her shoulders begin to tremble. Small tremors at first, until her whole body is shaking, her breath rattling in her lungs, and the dam breaks.

“Bucky,” she whispers and her voice cracks, the sob ripping from her throat. “Bucky.”

Gravity brings them together, two dying stars collapsing into each other. He folds her in his arms and in the steel cage of his body, protected against the world, she lets go and she cries. She cries for everything.

For her past. For Bucky. For the life they could have had and for everything they lost. For all the secrets and hiding and half-truths. For everything both of them have done. For the decades spent apart, the solitude she fell into, and the horrors he endured.

Tears pour out, great heaving sobs and she burrows into him, the first real taste of heat she’s felt since that barren Parisian apartment at the dawning of 1970. His hands rub up and down her back, and he hushes her softly, murmuring soothing words again and again.

“You’re okay, I’m here, I got you. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not letting go.”

Gently picking her up, he slips back into the warmth of the living room, locking the door against the cold night. Stepping carefully to the couch, he falls into the velvety cushions, hugging her close. She sobs seventy years of heartbreak against his chest, and Bucky rocks her, answering her pain with hot, silent tears dripping down his cheeks.

*****

The night crawls by, a full white moon traveling a slow arc above the small cabin, while he cradles her in his arms. In the final hour before dawn, he rises from the couch.

Emotionally drained, she fell asleep hours ago. Now, she curls into him as he carries her up the stairs to her bed. Unwilling to let go for even a moment, he keeps her tucked to his chest when he sinks into the soft pillows. In the depths of sleep, she hugs him tighter, winding herself around him.

Where does he end, and where does she begin? It’s impossible to define.

Her refusal to let go is fine with him. Bucky doesn’t plan to leave anytime soon.

In her sleep, she sighs in contentment, because for the first time in a lifetime, she feels warm. Safe and protected, she doesn’t need a pile of blankets.

Bucky is enough.

*****

Light filters through the tall evergreens outside her window and when she wakes, she’s surrounded by heat. Opening puffy eyes, she finds Bucky lying beside her, bright eyes calm and watchful.

“Good morning,” he whispers.

“Bucky?” she whispers, disbelief clear in her eyes. “You’re still here?”

He runs a light finger down her cheek. “I meant it. I’m not going anywhere.”

There they are, the words she’s wanted her entire life. She has no clue if they’ll fade away, but for now, she lets herself believe him, because hope feels so much softer than the black abyss of depression.

“You’ll stay?” she repeats numbly. Needing to hear the words one more time.

“I’ll stay,” he answers, his fingers still brushing her skin. “Long as you’ll let me. We have a love story to remember.”

*****

So, he stays.

Bit by bit, they begin to discover who they are now, after decades apart. Bit by bit, she offers small memories that he clings to with ferocious enthusiasm. Bit by bit, they find the new rhythm of a life together.

And bit by bit, they fall back in love.

*****

Gripping a mug of coffee between fingerless gloved fingers, she gives him a dubious look.

“Have you ever chopped wood before?”

“Nah, but how hard can it be?” Bucky shrugs, hefting the ax. “Steve said he did it. I can do it.”

He balances a chunk of wood on the stump and scrutinizes it from all angles, before choosing his approach. Lining up the blade, he takes aim and with a smooth swing, slices it neatly in two.

His eyes dance excitedly when he looks at her. “I feel like this could be cathartic. Can I keep going?”

She looks at the huge pile of logs stacked behind him. “Knock yourself out.”

He considers her for a moment and then stands up a fat log, twisting it to sit level in the snow, away from any bark shrapnel, but close enough he can see her.

“Keep me company?” he asks.

She plops happily on the log, savoring the image of his tall, heavily muscled form. “Anytime,” she says softly.

*****

“I saw in that journal, you watched the moon landing? Back in ’68?”

Her eyes light up. “I did. It was unbelievable.”

“Wish I could’ve seen it,” Bucky says wistfully. “Would’ve been so cool.”

“Yeah,” she says softly, “it really was.”

The ax embeds in the stump with a thwack and he wipes his forehead with his sleeve. He comes over to her and leans down, his mouth warm when it touches hers.

“You were right,” he admits. “I’d have signed up with NASA in a heartbeat, if I could’ve.”

“I thought you might,” she murmurs against his lips and he hums.

“Hey. Would you go up to space with me?”

She kisses the tip of his nose. “I’ll go anywhere with you.”

*****

“Since you’ve come back, what’s the strangest mission you’ve been on?”

Bucky contemplates the question, while he searches for the perfect chunk of wood.

“Well, last year there was this one where a crazy ass botanist engineered this breed of super Venus Fly Traps that came to life.”

“A crazy what? No.”

“Dead serious. It caught me in the middle of the fight and broke its teeth on my arm,” he says, shuddering. “Got all this sticky saliva shit on me. So fucking gross. When I got home, I threw away all the plants in the Tower, you know. Just in case.”

She presses her lips together, but a fit of hysterical giggles makes her double-over, clutching her stomach.

“Cross my heart,” Bucky insists. He plants his hands on his hips and pulls a face. “I can’t believe you’re laughing, I was terrified!”

*****

“Tell me more things about you,” he grunts as he swings the ax. “Like for instance, why did you keep a bunch of t-shirts from Bon Jovi’s 1986 tour?”

Looking over to her, he finds her eyes comically wide. Deer in the headlights. He can practically see her mind racing while she debates the answer.

“Um. Okay, so listen,” she starts, and Bucky feels a silly grin beginning. “No, stop. I mean it. Bucky, shut up!”

Laughter spills out at her embarrassment.

“Sorry, sorry,” he chuckles. “I won’t laugh. I’m interested. Just wanna hear more about you. Continue. Please.”

Arms crossed, she sighs heavily and shoots him an embarrassed look.

“Look, it’s not that big a deal. I may have had a crush on Bon Jovi. Okay? It was 1986 and I loved that album and his voice was so sexy and he had this beautiful hair, and I just – you promised you wouldn’t laugh!”

She grabs a piece of wood and throws it at his leg and he laughs harder.

*****

After a long day of chopping wood, her shed is bursting at the seams. Warm and cozy on her couch, Bucky stares off into space, while she sits beside him, absorbed in a book.

“Did I get blood all over the seats in your truck?” he asks suddenly.

Wrinkling her nose, she glances up and gives him an apologetic look. “Yeah. You did. I need to get it cleaned. Or buy seat covers, so I don’t have to explain why it looks like a murder scene.”

“Ugh,” Bucky sighs, shaking his head. “I’m sorry.”

She shrugs good-naturedly and grins. “I don’t mind. Least no one will steal it.”

She goes back to her book. He goes back to spacing off.

“But you have another truck in that old shed, right? Didn’t I see one?”

“Yes, an old clunker from the ‘50s. It hasn’t run for years though.”

“Hmm.”

Bemused, her lips quirk up. “Any reason you’re asking?”

“Just thinking,” he mumbles vaguely.

He goes back to spacing off. She goes back to her book.

Two minutes later, he jumps up and she topples over into the cushions. Looking down, he rubs his mouth while she untangles herself from her blanket.

“Shit. Sorry. Got an idea,” he says, offering her a hand. Pulling her to her feet, he starts collecting the multitude of blankets strewn about the living room, folding them into piles. Tucking them under his arm, he heads into the kitchen, rummaging in the cabinet for a bottle of wine and two plastic cups. Striding over to the front door, he sets the pile down and grabs her winter coat, extending it out without a word.

“What is this?” she asks suspiciously, shrugging into the coat. Bucky takes a knobby wool scarf from a hook and helps her wrap it securely around her throat.

“Get your gloves,” he replies. “And those furry snow boots.”

Finally buttoned up, he appraises her from head to toe, satisfied with the result. Grabbing his own coat, he pulls it carelessly on, picks up the pile of blankets and wine, and opens the door.

“Follow me,” he says, heading down the porch.

Stomping toward the rickety garage near the cabin, he pulls open the doors and props them open. Sitting in the small space, is an old light blue Land Rover.

Bucky takes her puffy gloved hand and pulls her to the passenger side door. Opening it with a dramatic flourish, he nods for her to get in.

“It doesn’t even run, Bucky,” she argues, climbing up into the dusty seats.

Bucky goes to the driver’s door and slides inside. Giving her a grin, he flips the flashlight on his phone and hands it to her, lighting up the interior of the cab while he reaches blindly below the steering column.

“Any chance you got a screwdriver?”

“I do, actually,” she answers, flipping open the glove box to snag the wobbly screwdriver that went to die there years ago. But where it’s normally nestled, she finds only blank space.

She blinks. How strange. When was the last time she was even in this truck?

“No matter,” Bucky grunts, and with a few strategic jerks, he pulls the metal cover away. A nest of tangled wires falls loose, ribbons of white and red and yellow. She shines the light on his fiddling, and with a practiced hand, he selects several and strips the ends until they fray. Tapping them together a few times, she hears the sharp crackle of electric current and suddenly the ancient truck sputters to life.

“What? How?” she asks excitedly. “How’d you do that?”

Bucky grins and tucks the wires away. The gas gauge shows a nearly full tank, so he fiddles with the dials and cranks the heat up full blast. It smells like wet leaves and a hint of motor oil, but there’s a welcome nostalgia to the scent. Unfolding the blankets, Bucky wraps one around her shoulders, and spreads another over their laps. He situates her legs across his thighs and wraps an arm around her.

“Reading those letters, I saw I made you a promise. Said I’d take you to a drive-in movie. Here we are, seventy god forsaken years later, and I still haven’t taken you on a date. Seems overdue,” he thumbs through the video app on his phone until he finds an old favorite. Pressing play, he props it up on the dash and turns to her with a crooked smile. “This is my favorite movie. Thinkin’ you might like it too.”

The screen is blank and then a tornado of sound surrounds them and big white letters flash across a black and white screen.

“Oh,” she sighs delightedly. Humming contentedly, he drops a kiss to her forehead and she lays her head on his shoulder, while the opening theme from The Wizard of Oz begins to play. “You’re amazing Bucky Barnes.”

“Well, that’s what I’m always telling people,” he agrees, his voice sweet against her skin. “I’m glad you agree.”

Watching the movie together is an experience. Bucky hums along to the music while she repeats the dialogue under her breath. The movie is clearly an old hat for them both, and the familiarity is comforting.

It’s not until Dorothy’s skipping down the yellow brick road in her sparkly red shoes, that she notices he’s gone quiet. Glancing at him, she finds blue eyes riveted on her. A slow smile spreads over his face, and he leans down to leave a featherlight kiss at the corner of her mouth; then the hinge of her jaw; then the smooth spot behind her ear.

“I thought we were watching a movie,” she murmurs, tilting her head to offer up the curve of her neck.

“But we’re at the drive-in,” Bucky answers, his lips tracing the shell of her ear. She shivers at the feel and tries to scoot closer. “This is what the kids do. They ignore the show and make out, right?”

“Yes, I think I read that somewhere,” she replies breathlessly. “A letter I had from a rather charming soldier. Some American, I think.”

Rubbing his scratchy face along her neck, he makes a disapproving noise and his teeth nip her ear.

“Charming American soldier, huh? What’s his name? I’m gonna kick his ass.”

“No ass kicking.” She pokes him in the belly and he grunts a surprised laugh. “I sort of like him.”

*****

The truck still idles along, while the windows have long since fogged over. Dorothy makes it back to Kansas safe and sound, returned to a world of black and white. There’s no place like home, Bucky hears the voiceover in the background. Immersed in reacquainting himself with the taste of her lips, he agrees.

There really is no place like home.

*****

“Was it always like this?” he murmurs the next night. Laying face-down on the couch, his face is nuzzled in her lap, his arms wound around her waist. Cool fingers scratch lightly at his scalp and he rubs against her like a cat.

“Well, you were a little sappy sometimes,” she teases. “But I loved it.”

Muffled laughter rumbles deep in his chest and he hugs her tighter.

“This feels so easy. Never thought I’d get something like this.”

“Sometimes you get lucky, I guess. You fit with someone, like they were made for you. That was us.”

“I just wish I could remember.” Disappointment vibrates in every syllable. “All those years with Hydra, that shit’s coming back. Nightmares and — memories of what I did to people. I don’t understand why that’s there, and my stupid ass brain refuses to give me you.”

Her hand pauses briefly, before resuming the gentle strokes.

“I know,” she says, and Bucky hears the thread of sorrow wound through her words. “None of this was fair. You deserved so much more than what they did and I - I’m so sorry Bucky.”

“No, don’t. I’m the one who should be apologizing.” He rolls onto his back and pillows his head in her lap. His expression is dark when he grinds out the words. “I just left you. Fell off a fuckin’ train and left you alone. I’ll never forgive myself for it.”

For the longest time, she doesn’t speak. Lost in thought, she gazes out the living room windows, fingers still absently stroking his hair. When she finally looks down, he sees ancient resignation in her face.

“Listen to me. I never want you to apologize Bucky, it was a war. I walked into loving you with my eyes wide open and I don’t regret a single day. I never have. You were worth it.” She pauses, and a strange look comes over her face, an odd blend of sadness and regret and - fear. It disappears as quickly as it comes, and her voice drops to a low whisper. “I’m full of memories. After all these years, after everything I - after being alone for so long. Sometimes I think I’ll drown from them.”

Drowning in the past. There’s a feeling he knows. Curling his fingers around the back of her neck, he tugs her face down.

“Give them to me then,” he breathes against her lips. “I get it. Better than anyone. Remembering things, sometimes it’s a burden. You don’t have to do it alone. I’m with you now, let me help.”

The sentiment breaks her heart.

She says nothing. She kisses him instead.

*****

In the middle of the night, watching the stars wink through the window of her bedroom, she lays awake and thinks.

Bucky is sprawled on his stomach beside her, still dressed in his old sweats and his Captain America shirt. One arm is curved tight around her waist, a leg thrown over her knee, his deep even breaths warm against her neck. It’s funny, she muses. He sleeps the same as he did during their brief time together in 1944. With his nose to her skin and his limbs clutching her tight. Like her softness is the balm he needs to combat the horrors that come for him in his dreams.

It’s strange, in a way. He knows her more intimately than anyone on Earth. Emotionally. Physically. But even with a knowledge of what they used to be, he keeps a tight rein on his desire, nothing more than chaste brushes of his fingers that leave her restless for more. But while his hands may be innocent, his kisses still leave her breathless - they’re untamed, wild and enthusiastic, overflowing with passion. Before though, where his lips carried a hint of frantic panic, now there’s one big difference.

They have time. Something they never had before.

There’s no miserable march back into the suffocating arms of war. No desperate need to hide from Hydra after a stolen rendezvous in the night. Time is finally on their side, to rebuild his memories of their past, to create new memories together. An infinite world of opportunities sits before them and she revels in that fact.

Beneath it all though, remains that nagging flicker of fear.

Because as happy as she is now, she’s terrified of the future and the possibility it could all end once more. After finding him again, after slipping back into his arms, after falling in love again, she knows if he were to leave now? It would break her for good. There’d be no coming back from it. Life has stolen him from her too many times already.

This time, hope would not be enough to tether together the shattered remnants of a heart.

Shifting deeper into the pillows, he hugs her tighter. His lips brush her skin and he presses a sleepy kiss to her shoulder.

“Can’t sleep?” he mumbles groggily.

“Just thinking,” she whispers. “I’m okay, go back to sleep.”

Bucky hums in drowsy agreement and goes quiet. Minutes pass and his breathing resumes the steady pattern and she resumes her dreary train of thought.

What is it, about the middle of the night, she wonders drily, that makes your brain relive the worst parts of your life?

On and on it goes. The steady beat of his heart, the heat of his skin, the dangerous trajectory of her thoughts. Until his soft voice breaks the silence of the night, pulling her back to the present.

“Can you tell me another story? Another memory about us?”

Another memory. A simple request. Memories are the one thing she can always do.

“What do you want to know?” she asks, petting his tangled mess of hair.

“Everything. Tell me more of our love story,” he murmurs, his voice raspy with sleep. He snuggles impossibly closer. “I wanna know it all.”

I wanna know it all. An innocent request.

There are so many things she wants to tell him. Things she needs to tell him. But those words, those memories, they’re buried too deep and she can’t. Unearthing them would destroy her.

Instead, her mind weaves through their love story, pulling forward a memory she’s replayed a thousand times before. The memory of his one other visit to the village, right before their world went pear-shaped. She was hesitant to tell him about that night, about the question he asked, because she knows he’s not the same. They’re not the same and she doesn’t want him to think -

But her heart beats faster.

Twisting a lock of his hair around her finger, she gropes for the right words, his fingers stroking lightly down her arm.

I wanna know it all.

In the middle of the night, watching the stars wink through the window of her bedroom, she takes a deep breath.

*****

Next chapter

*****

Tags are open right now, if you want one, please send me a DM or ASK.

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky #bucky barnes #bucky fic #altnl

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dontdoit19 · 5 years ago

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My Life

There is little to no purpose in my life. Let me get into why. First of all I am ugly. Not crazy ugly but there are features about my face that I cannot do anything about that make me ugly. Second of all I am fat. Like not obese but like 5’11, 200 so I have like a bit of a stomach I guess, some man boobs, and a huge butt and thighs which makes all pants look weird.

I love food. It is one of the only things that makes me feel good in life. I would say it makes me feel happy but I rarely ever feel happy. Food makes me fat and isn’t it funny how one of the only things in the whole world that makes me feel good also makes me feel horrible about myself?

Because I am fat and ugly I don’t have any intimate relationships with females. Intimate relationships also make me feel good. I still don’t have any though. It wasn’t always like this. I have kissed three girls in my life. My first kiss I could’ve probably kissed again, but for some reason I did not. My second kiss I dated for two weeks before she broke up with me a day before my birthday. This was sophomore year of high school. Then after sophomore year I got fat. And when I got fat I got progressively uglier in the face. I had no luck with females. Until senior year I kissed a freshman girl, she was 15 I was 17 so I like to think it was not so weird, but then she told everyone her next boyfriend was much better than me.

There was once when people found me attractive. Early high school for some reason people did think I was good looking. I was probably the slimmest I have ever been, and in a predominantly african school. It didn’t last long. They soon found my friends at the time more attractive. That brief moment of time I felt so powerful and it had an effect on the rest of my first two years of high school. I saw people treat me with respect because girls thought I was attractive. I saw how being attractive is a serious leg up in the world. That’s what is so annoying about not being attractive besides not being found attractive to women. The fact that people whether they show it or not, view you as less than because you are not attractive, often feel pity for you and will never think of you the same.

I do not have many friends either. Yes I have acquaintances but barely any friends in the world. Over 1000 followers on instagram but maybe 10 friends maximum. I have been a liar for as long as I can remember. I lie about nearly everything to nearly everyone. Told my sister I lost my virginity and all of my close friends, despite that being the one thing I said I was going to be truthful about. I also steal things. I call it burrowing but truly it is stealing. I’ve stopped doing that but, ehh, I don’t know. I also feel good when I take marijuana. I think I like it because when I’m sober I’m too afraid to act myself. I never act myself around anyone. I simply act like the person I am talking to, trying to make myself desperately seem cool enough to talk to. I think I lie because I am embarrassed about how pathetic my life is and I want others to think I have interesting things to say, and I myself am interesting.

I am sort of smart. I have the capacity to do good in school but have never tried hard in anything in life so I do not know. That’s the thing. People tell me I have potential in life, but honestly I can only kindoff see it. I would lose weight, but it’s too much effort and not losing weight also feels good. I would learn how to invest so I could jumpstart my career and learn how to be rich but that also takes too much effort and I’d rather not because being lazy also feels good. Also I think I want to be rich because I like things and don’t like being poor, but honestly hope there’s more to life than just money. Being lazy feels too good. As I write this I have a load of missing assignments as well as a final project which will take several hours to do. I say I will do it tomorrow but will most likely start and not finish. I am writing this at 3AM because I am so lazy that my sleep schedule has completely switched during this global pandemic and I have become completely nocturnal, sleeping from around 9AM-4PM.

I do not like my own family. My mother is okay and I think I love her but I don’t know. Like when I am not around her I am sure I do. But when I am, things become awkward and I feel like I strongly dislike her. My sister I think I love too but she sometimes feels like talking to a stranger. My father also feels like a stranger and he is far from a good dad. I also think I have reached a point in my life where I have lied so much that I don’t even know who I am. That’s who I hope to learn about in college. See if I can work hard. See if I can find love. See if I can find friends. And the hardest thing is going to be being honest with my family. Showing me who I truly am and not caring about what they think. But that’s the thing, everyone I have shown who I truly am doesn’t like what they see.

I wonder if I am even capable of making friends or finding love. Like the only people I find attractive are very attractive. And I think I’m being hypocritical when I say that because I get pissed off when I see girls online liking guys only for their looks. But my animal instincts have made only attractive females attractive. I cannot see an attractive female finding me attractive. When I see couples online whenever the girl is attractive so is the guy. The guy has several features about themselves that I don’t have. Maybe he is taller or just overall better looking. I also find transgender women attractive. I wonder if it’s some weird fetish because I do not think I could be in a relationship with one especially considering after I’m done watching transgender porn I cannot imagine kissing her or being intimate with her. That definitely makes me feel like a bad person saying, no disrespect to the transgender community.

I wonder If I’m a bad person. Because I lie and steal I must be. I think the stealing was a phase in my life that I am now done with but I’ll always have the urge to. And the lying I cannot stop. Like I tell myself I’ll be done with it in college but honestly I do not know if I can see it stop. I think I am nice to others but I can also be really mean. Maybe it’s just because the world has been so cruel to me that I am mean but honestly I hate that it makes me feel good being mean.

I hate coronavirus. If it wasn’t for the virus I was going to lose my virginity back in boarding school. I think that would have made me feel good too. It seems weird to say but I have a very large penis, and I only say that because I think it would make me good at sex which I think I would’ve enjoyed knowing. Like the fact that I have potential to be good at sex means maybe a girl could like me.

Somehow I am going to a really good school next year. Probably because of my SAT which I barely studied for but just happened to do alright in but obviously not as good as I wanted to, me being black, and writing a pretty good essay. It’s not an ivy league school but it’s like right below that. And it’s a good mix of all the things I want. Big school in a big city which means lots of people and maybe I could find a group that likes me and a girl that likes me, good business program because I like the idea of working on wall street minus the stressful hours, and a place where I could rebrand myself.

I wonder if there’s something wrong with me. I don’t feel bad about lying obviously but know it’s not good. I basically lack personality, and whenever I show people my true personality they find me annoying and stop liking me. I also don’t know whether I truly love anyone including my own family. For some reason I am still hopeful that everything is fine. In my near 18 years of life, life has given me just enough to keep me hopeful but no true happiness.

I love parties. I’ve barely been to any but all the ones I’ve gone to have been amazing. I get rejected by women each time. Huge blow to my self esteem, but when they don’t reject me and dance with me it feels amazing. I want to go to parties where no one knows who I am and maybe then I can be myself and see what others think.

I often wonder whether there were chances I had with women I just never took the chance on. I also often wonder whether I’ve just continued to meet the wrong people and will make friends one day. I don’t know why I have hope but I think it generally comes from the fact that I have a positive attitude. Despite my life being in my opinion pretty shitty, I stay positive. I cannot say life has not blessed me. It’s made me healthy, male, straight, and I’ve grown up in an upper middle class household with a mother and sister I think love me. It’s just I think what is life without happiness. What is life if I cannot be myself. What is life if I cannot find friends and loved ones.

I could never show this to anyone. Not only would my facade of a life be done, but the truth often hurts and I know I would lose friendships. I cannot face the judgement from my family as well. But I think that’s the issue. The fact that I cannot be honest means I will always continue lying and my life may never change.

#lifestory

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tornadotori123 · 5 years ago

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Mindless

Inktober : Prompt 2 is MINDLESS ~ I can't draw but am using Inktober prompts!

Rain tapped on the wooden roof above Sakura’s head, making her feel sleepy. She had been up all night working on a new song. Putting her forehead in her hand she sighed loudly.

“Shouldn’t you be working on homework?” A voice inquired from the other side of the room. Sakura turned and looked at her best friend.

“Sasuke, I think its nap time.” Sakura smiled at him. He shook his head and continued plucking on his acoustic guitar. Sakura rolled her eyes, tapping on her music notebook.

“How can I work on homework? This chorus is driving me crazy. I can’t seem to make it work.” She huffed and shut the scraggily notebook, pushing it away all in one motion.

Sasuke put his guitar in its stand and walked over to her. He tapped her on the head.

“You think too much into it. You write the best when your mind is somewhere else,” he reached for her notebook and she grasped out to get it back.

“You aren’t allowed to look.” Sakura stuttered out, grabbing it back from him. She saw Sasuke raise a brow. A perfect brow on a perfect smooth face. Sakura looked up at him, blushing. Her face was hot, and she could feel her neck start to sweat. Damn, she thought. Huffing again, she slid the notebook back to him.

“No laughing.” Sakura told him, glaring at him sideways. She stood up and went to dig around in their mini fridge.

“I never laugh at you.” Sasuke cracked a smile at her. Sakura held a bottle of water to her neck and bit her lip.

“You are big fat liar Sasuke.”

Sakura watched as he opened her notebook and saw his eyes scanning the words, the notes, and the little citations she made in the margins. He stood up abruptly and Sakura’s back hit the counter. She hissed in pain, rubbing the spot.

“You sure are jumpy.” Sasuke noted and swiftly grabbed his guitar. “Just getting this. Maybe you can sing it when I play it for you.”

Sakura fiddled with the hem of her skirt. Embarrassment was one emotion she didn’t experience often, but here she stood, anxiously waiting for Sasuke to start playing. They had been in a band together since high school but started taking it seriously their first year of college. They were in the beginning of their sophomore year and time to practice was becoming rare to come by. Both Sasuke and herself were studying in the medical field, making band practice a much-needed sacred ritual. It wasn’t performing in front of him that made her nervous, one and one practices were commonplace. The words in her notebook stared back at her. She wasn’t too sure of the meaning of the song herself, but it had been keeping her up the past few days.

Sakura homed in on Sasuke’s slender fingers, plucking at the strings. She had always loved his hands. They were big but gentle. Always soothing her after a bad break-up or more recently holding her back when she drank too much. On nights like those Sasuke fell asleep with her head in his lap on her uncomfortable couch and Sakura would wake up to him snoring softly. They were always there for each other.

Sakura’s phone buzzed and she glimpsed at it.

“Gaara’s calling, give me on second.” Hurriedly, she answered her phone and immediately rolled her eyes. Sasuke gave a crooked smirk and shook his head.

“Well right now I’m practicing. I mean…sure we can go to dinner.” She smiled at Gaara’s remark about wearing something sexy, but then she also noticed Sasuke’s eyes on her.

“Uh huh, see you in a bit.” Sakura concluded, as she was pressing the hang up button, she hit the speaker instead.

“I love you Sakura. Can’t wait to see you.” Gaara’s soft voice echoed through the apartment. Panic ensued. Without thinking she hung up the phone and stared wide-eyed at Sasuke. He looked back at her questioningly.

“On that level already huh?” He asked. Sakura doubted he meant to sound so…hurt? She couldn’t be sure.

“T-that was the first time I’ve heard him say that. I hung up. Sasuke, what do I do? I feel bad but…”

“You don’t love him?” Sasuke finished her thought but in a curious manner. Sakura bit her lip again and sank down into her bean bag chair. She didn’t even know what love really was. “You know it’s okay not to be sure dork.” Sasuke stated and smacked Sakura on the leg.

“Let’s practice your song and then go get ready. He said wear something sexy? Do you even own something like that?” Sasuke smirked at her and her face began to heat up again.

“Fuck you Uchiha! I own a very nice dress thanks.”

“Hm you said nice not sexy.” Sasuke pointed a finger gun at her and she pouted.

“So rude. Let’s get this over with so I can pretend I know what sexy even is.” Sakura puffed out.

Sasuke started strumming his guitar again and Sakura counted, “One, two, three…”

You touch me and it’s almost like we knew That there will be history between us two We knew someday that we would have regrets But we just ignored them the night we met We just dance backwards into each other Trying to keep our feelings secretly covered You touch me and it’s almost like we knew That there will be history

Sakura looked at Sasuke, who was concentrating on learning the melody and chords. His nose always scrunched up in a certain way when he focused on something. Those black eyes hard and intense. She had started realizing all the little things about him. Of course, she knew his mannerisms and his ticks but recently she found herself swimming in them. Sakura wanted to see all of him all the time.

After spending some minutes revising Sakura and Sasuke felt pretty good about what they had accomplished.

“Alright, Karin is blowing my phone up. I guess I’m going to head out.” Sasuke sighed. Sakura looked at him and smiled softly.

“You handle her crazy so well.”

“Hn. Not as good as yours.” Sasuke shot back at her. Sakura’s fingertips tingled. She wanted to touch him. Playfully and cautiously she reached out and patted his cheek.

“You only think you can handle me Sasuke Uchiha.” As she retracted her hand, Sasuke abruptly grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards him.

“Is that a challenge Haruno?” He hoarsely asked in her ear. Sakura wasn’t sure where this was coming from but her whole body throbbed in anticipation.

“Maybe it is.” She pulled back and gave a lopsided smirk. Sasuke was so close so could feel his breath tickling her nose. Without much thought she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him hard. His arms went around her waist and he leaned into her kiss. She knew they had to stop but couldn’t force herself to take a step back.

Sasuke’s cellphone started ringing. The Darth Vader ringtone meant Naruto was calling and that was unusual. Naruto was the type of person to just text.

Sakura found her break and backed away from Sasuke. She knew her face was as red as a tomato and her hands were clammy.

“It must be important.” Sakura stated shakily. Sasuke gave a curt nod and quickly answered the phone.

“Idiot.” Sasuke scoffed into the phone. Sakura gave him a small wave and walked down the hall to her room. Her heart was beating hard in her chest. Touching her lips, she groaned. How could she be so reckless, so mindless? Big trouble. She was in big trouble.

I wish I could make the time stop So we could forget everything and everyone I wish that the time would line up So we could just give in to what we want ‘Cause when I got somebody, you don’t And when you got somebody, I don’t I wish that the time would line up So we could just give in

—–FIVE YEARS LATER—-

Sasuke pulled his scarf closer to his face to avoid the cold December air that was whipping his cheeks harshly. His stomach was in knots and his hands were clammy and sweaty inside of his gloves. Naruto invited him and his older brother, Itachi, to a family and friends get together but also offered to let them stay the week. The holidays were fast approaching which meant it was Itachi’s busiest time and he had to decline the offer. Being a cop in a big city during the most celebrated time of the year made it nearly impossible to get away. So Sasuke had to make the drive back home by himself. He saw the silver lining in most things, so he was also glad he didn’t have to worry about his brother having delayed flights or losing luggage.

Sasuke had allowed himself to take two weeks off to visit Konoha. After he graduated college, he moved to a small town about three hours away and became a biology teacher at the local high school. He was also worked at the emergency room on the weekends. Busy was an understatement. Naruto calling him up demanding to come stay for a week for Christmas was the break Sasuke didn’t realize he needed. Of course, he had spent a few weekends at Naruto’s place, but it had been at least two years. The fool was married and had a baby to look after. Sasuke didn’t want to intrude. Honestly, he missed Konoha. Its busy streets and familiar sounds and sights. He had been homesick, but he didn’t know it was to this extent. His brain was doing flips. Sakura was going to be there.

The band didn’t make it through the last semester of senior year due to everyone drowning in senior projects. Sasuke and Karin had long been split up and she was dating a friend of Sasuke’s. Karin and Suigetsu argued more than any healthy couple should and Sasuke praised the heavens she had moved on from him or he would be in jail for murder. But since the band broke up, Sakura was deep into her nursing studies and Sasuke and Naruto got put on the back burner. They were still on the stove, but they knew she was frazzled and desperately needed sleep whenever she could get it. They hung out once a week in her apartment and worked on songs, played video games and slept over. To Sasuke it wasn’t enough time to be near her. Sakura never mentioned the kiss again and continued like it didn’t happen. Sasuke, however, couldn’t seem to let it go. So much so he broke it off with Karin that same night. Sakura and Gaara however were still together when everyone walked across the stage at graduation. He squeezed his fists together. Sasuke wasn’t sure how he was going to handle seeing Sakura with Gaara at this party. As far as he knew, they were happy and still together.

“Why wouldn’t they be?” He asked himself foolishly.

Naruto’s house came into view and he steadied himself. You’re a grown ass man, get a hold of yourself. However, he couldn’t bring himself to knock on the bright red in front of him.

“Well are you going to knock dork?” A soft voice asked from behind him. Sasuke turned around and felt the air in his body leave.

“S-Sakura.” He didn’t know what else to say.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost Sasuke.” Sakura smiled at him. Her pink bangs were curled around her face most of it was pulled into a bun on her head. It had grown out quite a bit in the last year, she used to keep it short. A small green shimmering nose ring caught the light of the door lamp and some freckles danced on her cheeks. Then he saw her eyes. Those emerald orbs were shining with happiness, her eyelashes coated in black mascara and fluttered in the cold breeze. He felt like he was in a twisted role of fate. Sakura reached out and rapped her knuckle on the door.

“It’s freezing out here. You are going to catch a cold.” Sakura scolded him. He was only half listening to what she said. There was a silver and emerald ring on her slim finger that caught his attention and he couldn’t rip his eyes from it.

Suddenly the door opened, and Naruto looked at the two on the porch in surprise.

“Well look what the cat dragged in!” He shouted as he engulfed Sasuke and Sakura into a wide hug. Sasuke grunted and felt his hand brush against Sakura’s arm. Sakura squeaked. He wasn’t sure if it was because of Naruto squeezing the air out of her or if she felt the tingling sensation like he did.

Hinata, Naruto’s wife, came to the door and pulled Naruto back.

“I-it’s cold Naruto, let them in.” She commanded but softly. Sasuke smiled at her. The opposite of his idiot friend and he loved her for it. Sakura hooked an arm around Hinata’s waist and pulled her into a hug.

“I need to see the baby! I have been dying to meet him.”

Sasuke watched as Hinata and Sakura rounded the corner to a relatively noisy dining room. He could feel Naruto staring at him.

“What idiot?” Sasuke snapped. Naruto shrugged and smiled at his friend. Sasuke did not like the way Naruto was patting him on the back.

“Still got it just as bad, don’t you?” Naruto asked, wiggling his eyebrows. Sasuke scoffed and took off his coat.

“I don’t know what you’re referring to.”

“Yes, you do. Did you see the ring on her finger? I don’t remember Hinata saying Sakura was engaged. Did you know?” Naruto asked as he hung up Sasuke’s scarf and jacket on the coat rack.

“No. We haven’t really spoken. She’s been busy. Being a doctor and all, Naruto.” Sasuke rolled his eyes at his best friend who looked at him with pitiful eyes. “Stop looking at me like that. She deserves to be happy.”

“Who does?”

Sasuke peeked into the doorway of the dining area and Sakura was standing there with baby Boruto in her hands. The lights from the Christmas tree in the corner of the room bounced off her porcelain skin that her sweater dress didn’t cover. He wasn’t sure how he didn’t notice the red lipstick earlier but when he saw it, he couldn’t look away.

Naruto nudged his friend in the side.

“Oh, sorry. No one in particular.” Sasuke mumbled feeling sheepish. Sakura eyed him and Naruto suspiciously.

“Naruto take the baby. Come talk to some of you other guests please. You have all the time in the world to catch up with these two.” Hinata softly said, placing her hand in the small of Naruto’s back.

“Are you staying a week as well Sasuke?” Sakura asked, her eyes lighting up again like he had seen on the porch. He nodded at her and felt his face warm under her mystical stare. Eventually he looked down at his feet. Naruto and Hinata left the common area and swiftly made their way to the kitchen.

The night carried on. Sakura was chatting with Ino, a glass of wine in her hand. Sasuke greeted his childhood friends and gave swift hugs. Everyone enjoyed a dinner Hinata prepared for them in earnest. Eventually the hands on the clock hit 11:30. Boruto was starting to get fussy and that meant everyone had to leave. Friends and family filed out with kisses and hugs ad wishes for a happy holiday. Sasuke had never been so glad when Naruto shut the door, and all was quiet. Sakura immediately throw her heels to the front door and groaned loudly.

“I hate heels.”

Same old Sakura, Sasuke smiled to himself. Boruto was whining in his basinet while Naruto and Hinata were in the kitchen putting food away. Sasuke watched Sakura stand up and coo at the baby. Once again, the ring on her finger stood out against the white basinet and he couldn’t take it anymore.

“When did it happen?” He asked suddenly but quietly. Sakura cocked her head in confusion. She looked down at Boruto and looked back at Sasuke.

“I would say about ten months ago.”

Sasuke stared at Sakura. She had been engaged ten months and no one knew?

“That’s quite a while.” He stated dryly. The temper he forgot he had was flaring slightly. Sakura looked at him like he had lost his mind.

“I mean, you can ask Hinata and Naruto. That’s not that long. It goes by quickly.” Sakura smiled sweetly at him and he wanted to throw a couch. She bounced Boruto until he started snoring.

“I remember when I used to fall asleep on you.” Sakura smiled at Boruto, but she was talking to Sasuke. He took her in. Immaculate wasn’t even close to describing how she looked with a swaddled baby in her arms. She looked so natural standing there, with a ring on her finger and a sleeping baby.

“You mean passed out.” Sasuke corrected. Instead of sitting in the chair next to her, Sakura crossed the room and sat down next to Sasuke. Rapid heart beats started to flood his ears.

“I never really thanked you for always being there Sasuke.” Sakura whispered. She turned to look at him. He felt like he was dying inside.

“You don’t have to thank me dork.” Touching her forehead with his pointer and index finger, he pushed slightly. She was smiling for him. At him. “When is the date?” He didn’t want to ask, but he knew one way or another he was going to be there for her.

“Date for what?” Sakura asked raising an eyebrow. Sasuke also raised an eyebrow.

“Your wedding?” Sasuke asked carefully. The word making him feel nauseous.

Sakura opened her mouth to say something but instead started laughing. Boruto wiggled in her arms and she had to force herself to be quiet. Sasuke was beyond confused and pissed off. Why was she laughing?

“I’m not getting married Sasuke. I’m not even engaged.” Sakura confirmed and giggled again.

“B-but you’re wearing a ring.” Sasuke felt like his world was shifted off his axis. She wasn’t engaged.

“It’s my mothers Sasuke. You know she has been sick. She gave it to me since I’m not at home.” Sakura took her hand and gripped his arm. Sasuke observed her hand, getting a good look at the ring. Upon seeing it, familiarity set in.

“Oh, my fucking god.” Exasperated he put his head in his hands. Sakura choked back another laugh but Sasuke still heard it.

“You were not freaking out about me having a ring on my finger Sasuke Uchiha.” Sakura scoffed at him.

“I was Haruno.” Sasuke sputtered out. His head hurt from the wine, the feeling that he lost her forever, and now realizing he was a complete idiot.

“Oh Sasuke. I haven’t dated anyone in about a year. Gaara and I started to drift right before graduation. I didn’t have the heart to do break it off right before such a big deal. I was too pre-occupied and busy with my studies. He did ask me you know.” Sakura sadly explained. Sasuke stared at her. Those green eyes drawing him further.

“I turned him down, and right after graduation I ended it.” Sakura finished, rocking the waking Boruto back to sleep. She looked away from him and it drove him crazy. He brought his hand up to her chin and turned her face back.

“Why?” Sasuke had to know. Did she feel the flames he was feeling by just sitting next to her?

“Because I love you, stupid Uchiha.” Tears welled up in Sakura’s eyes as she stared at Sasuke. “I’ve loved you for who knows how long. But I was sure you didn’t love me—”

Sasuke put his lips over her trembling ones and kissed her hard. He poured at least the last five years of emotion into that kiss. His hands gripping her shoulders trying to get her closer.

“Hey, don’t suffocate my kid.” Naruto interrupted. Sasuke and Sakura pulled away from each other quickly, blushing.

“Its nothing new. I’ve been around you guys for too long not to know you had something. It just took you both forever to deal with it,” he picked up Boruto carefully, “you guys have to share a room. But I doubt you’ll have an issue with that.” He remarked snidely. Naruto joined Hinata at the foot of the stairs after flipping off most of the downstairs lights.

“The mistletoe was well placed my dear.” Naruto kissed Hinata on the cheek as they walked up the stairs.

Sasuke and Sakura sat on the couch, spilling their feelings and sharing long needed kisses. Sakura looked up and smiled.

“Mistletoe. How fitting.” Sasuke shook his head, smiling. Sakura leaned in again and Sasuke pressed his lips against hers. Accompanying each other to the room they were sharing, they didn’t care where they were in that moment. The fire spread through their mindless kisses and eventually it felt like the whole room was ablaze, and they loved it.

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