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danganronpasurvivoraskblog · 4 days ago

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Dangancember 2024 - Danganronpa Top 24 Class Trials - Number 4: Danganronpa 2 Case 6

//Oh shit! OH SHIT! INCOMING HATERS! ABORT RANKING! ABORT RANKING-!

//GAH! GET OUT! AAAH! Fuck...! Gah...Okay...Okay fuck...Phew...Woah...Alright...

//Look...I fucking KNOW! Okay!?

//I'm not expecting to get RIDICULOUS levels of hate for this, but I am more aware than anyone that having ANY of the final trials THIS HIGH on the list. Especially since I have already said myself that they all have the same problems. And Danganronpa 2's final trial is FAR from exempt of these..

//This final trial often gets labeled as overrated by some fans, who argue it’s too flashy, too convoluted, or too dependent on high-stakes melodrama. It's still anime as fuck, its super long, it's super difficult so suddenly, and it's a massive plot dump. I will deny none of this.

//HOWEVER, I don't know what it is about this case specifically, but the more I look back on this trial, the more I LIKE it!

//We're in what I think is basically the S-Tier of this list. Even if this trial isn't S, it's still the top of A. And the defining factor that decides which of these cases gets this high up is "Which of these Class Trial do I like revisiting the most?" And this is definitely one of them, and I will gladly die on that hill.

//This case takes everything Danganronpa is known for; over-the-top twists, ridiculous logic battles, and moral dilemmas that make you question your own sanity; and cranks it up to eleven. Yes, you’re solving a murder while simultaneously wrestling with existential dread and facing down a genocidal AI.

//Yes, it’s bonkers, and yet for me, it works. Every wild revelation feels like it’s been carefully building from the beginning, paying off countless threads in ways that are surprising but satisfying.

//And that's it really. This is a SATISFYING CONCLUSION. Case 5 isn’t just a great finale; it perfectly captures what Danganronpa does best: mixing absurdity and sincerity into a neon-soaked cocktail of despair and hope.

//Unlike the first game’s ending, which leans heavily on Makoto Naegi’s generic optimism, or V3’s finale, which breaks the fourth wall so hard it practically demolishes the entire franchise, Danganronpa 2’s ending feels emotionally complete.

//And here's why:

//Let’s break down the key issues that this trial, and, let’s be honest, all Danganronpa final trials, tend to suffer from. First up, the obvious one: length.

//This trial is long, no doubt about it. But compared to some of its peers, it’s downright modest. V3’s final trial feels like a four-hour debate marathon, and Another 2’s third trial drags so much it feels like it got lost in a time loop. By comparison, Danganronpa 2’s finale uses its time well.

//Sure, it’s a commitment, but it’s packed with so many high-stakes moments and engaging revelations that I'm rarely looking at the clock. In fact, there are only four trials in the entire series that kept me glued to my seat from start to finish, and this one’s comfortably in that elite category, with the other three being the three trials above this one. Every topic of discussion felt purposeful, and I was never bored, which is more than I can say for some of its peers.

//Next is the dreaded plot dump problem.

//Let’s face it: of all the final trials, this one might be the guiltiest of shoving exposition down your throat. Junko Enoshima is less of an inquisitor here and more of an overly dramatic history professor, dumping lore at every opportunity like she’s trying to hit a word count on her evil dissertation. Unlike the first game’s finale, where she taunts you into piecing things together yourself, this trial often skips the mystery and goes straight to the lecture hall.

//But...at least that plot is GOOD.

//The revelations about the island, the survivors, and the Future Foundation are some of the most fascinating lore drops in the entire franchise. Sure, it’s a lot to take in, but it’s delivered with enough flair to keep me invested, and that’s a big part of why I’m still hooked on this series today.

//The next issue? The ridiculous difficulty spikes.

//This trial hits you with an "Improved" Hangman’s Gambit right out of the gate, which is ironic because the only thing it improves is your blood pressure.

//Let’s not sugarcoat it, "Improved" Hangman’s Gambit is a nightmare minigame in every trial it infects, and this one is no exception. But once you push through that, the rest of the challenges strike a much better balance.

//Take it away ProZD.

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//Sure, it’s tough, but unlike some trials where the difficulty feels like a punishment for daring to play, this one leans into "frustrating yet fair" territory. It’s challenging enough to keep you on your toes without making you want to chuck your controller out the window.

//And finally, the most meme-worthy complaint: the anime-esque absurdity of the villains’ defeat.

//Let’s not kid ourselves, this trial goes full Saturday morning cartoon by the end. Hajime literally turns into a golden-haired Super Saiyan and screams “FUTURE!” at Junko until she dies.

//It’s so over the top that it should derail the entire mood. And yet… it doesn’t. At least not for me.

//Instead, it feels triumphant, cathartic, and downright epic. Because even with it, the survivors still face an incredibly personal and difficult choice, confront their inner demons, and ultimately earn their victory. Sure, it’s a bit campy, but that doesn’t diminish the emotional weight of the ending. It’s goofy, it’s dramatic, it’s everything Danganronpa is, and honestly, I loved every second of it.

//These are still ultimately nitpicks that go against this trial and stop it from being one of my absolute favourites, even though it is a Top Tier spectacle for me. And I have one more big, pretty standout issue with this case, before I get into the stuff that I actually love about it.

//The Investigation segment...SUCKS!

//Unlike most of the final trials of the Danganronpa series, the actual "Daily Life" segment of this chapter is pretty long and full of detail and dialogue before the investigation starts. Which makes sense, considering what this trial comes off the back of.

//This chapter hits hard emotionally, coming fresh off the deaths of Chiaki and Nagito, arguably two of the most important and beloved characters in the game.

//Or at least, it should hit hard...if it weren’t so mind-bogglingly CONFUSING!

//At this point, the game fully commits to the twist that the island is actually a virtual reality simulation, and things spiral into absolute chaos. The world starts glitching like it’s running on a bootleg copy of Windows XP. Dead characters suddenly reappear, casually hanging around like nothing happened, and nobody seems to notice or care.

//I spent the first half of this chapter feeling like I’d walked into the wrong save file. It’s only when you enter the locked building that things start to click...or, rather, don’t click...because the weirdness keeps escalating.

//Monokuma, ever the fan of recycling his own shtick, drops a familiar ultimatum: "Solve all the mysteries and decide whether to leave or not." Then, boom, investigation time.

//Now, don’t get me wrong: unraveling the mysteries of the island and the Future Foundation is undeniably cool. But this investigation? Easily one of my least favorites in the series.

//Why? Because the glitches ramp up to such a dizzying degree that I felt like I was trapped in a bad fever dream.

//One moment I’m in the school, and the next I’m teleporting across random locations like that one scene in Guardians of the Galaxy 2 where they're jumping through several space time holes, and it feels EQUALLY AS PAINFUL as it looks!

//And don’t even get me started on the moment the entire world literally flips upside down. Yes, I get it, game, you’re driving home the point that we’re in a simulation. But do you have to give me vertigo while you’re at it!? It’s like they sat in a meeting and said, "What if we made the player understand the story by making them insanely fucking motion sick!"

//Well, mission accomplished, I guess!

//TLDR; This is NOT an investigation. It's an incredibly nauseatic FETCH QUEST.

//The clues themselves also aren't that interesting until you actually get in the trial, and it does open very well with the obvious twist, but we'll get to that. The only clue that stood out to me immediately, and that kind of interested me from the get go, was the fact that Hiyoko looks very different OUTSIDE the sim than she does INSIDE.

//And that's more of just a cool graphic, not necessarily anything that shocked me.

//But even though the investigation is a pile of dog shite, the character dynamics we see, and the way these dynamics carry on into the trial itself, is amazing. This trial not only has some of the best moments for the characters in this game, but vastly improves upon characters that we've already seen.

//Halfway through this trial, Hajime and his fellow survivors are joined by Makoto, Kyoko, and the real Byakuya. And even though their involvement here isn't THAT consequencial, it's still great to see them all back.

//Speaking of Hajime...

//I fucking LOVE Hajime!

//I mentioned earlier how heavily Shuichi is involved in the final conflict of Danganronpa V3, and I also briefly touched on how important Makoto is to the final showdown of the first game. However, I feel like I really missed the mark by not giving Hajime enough credit for how deeply he’s tied into the greater conflict of Danganronpa 2.

//This is, of course, entirely my personal opinion, but I believe Hajime plays a more central role in the story’s conflict than either Shuichi or Makoto. I just love the way Hajime reacts to the insane revelations during the final trial.

//The moment that stands out the most is when Junko casually drops the bombshell that Hajime is actually a fabricated personality of Izuru Kamukura. While the other characters are going to wake up and, you know, probably turn into supervillains, Hajime’s fate is way worse...he's going to be completely erased and vanish forever. As soon as this information hits him, he doesn’t just panic like you’d expect; he has a full-blown identity crisis.

//Hajime’s been struggling with his sense of self throughout the entire game, but this is the point where his existential meltdown reaches DEFCON 1. His anguished screams and his heartbreaking willingness to just give up and live in a world where everything repeats itself are gut-wrenching. Watching him go through this is honestly painful, and I find myself empathizing with him more than any of the other protagonists.

//This, I think, is the reason Hajime stands out to me. It’s not just about his struggle, it’s how human he is in his struggle. And holy shit if Johnny Yong Bosch's voice acting doesn't sell this:

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//These two moments in particular are the best parts of his traumatic breakdown ^^^

//But Hajime isn’t the only character who stands out here.

//Alongside the returning gang from DR1, there’s also Junko, who, surprise, surprise, is once again the villain.

//Now, I get it, some might find it a little tiresome that Junko is back as the mastermind, but I honestly think this is her best appearance in the whole series. I mentioned this when discussing the final case of the first game, but while Junko’s twist as the mastermind is certainly cool, her over-the-top, goofy persona kind of makes it hard to take her seriously as the main villain.

//In Danganronpa 2, however, when we encounter her as an AI counterpart, it’s a whole different story.

//Junko Enoshima’s role in Danganronpa 2 is one of the rare instances where a returning villain improves drastically in their execution, and it all comes down to how her presence is expanded and her actions take on a life of their own, literally and figuratively.

//She’s still got that signature cartoonish vibe, and she does still do the very sudden personality shifting, but now her tone is laced with a level of sadism and menace that feels downright chilling.

//It’s as if she’s crossed a line, and in this game, she’s not just the silly, chaotic villain we’ve seen before. She really feels like a true THREAT!

//Especially since her motivations, and what she actually hopes to achieve THIS TIME, are different from the stakes in DR1. Different in the sense that they feel SO much higher, and as a result, Junko feels like more of a monster.

//Junko is essentially trying to secure her posthumous victory by corrupting the Neo World Program and plunging the remaining members of the Future Foundation into despair, as well as take over the vegetable bodies of the people who died in DR2, and "Junko-fy" all of mankind, just as the tragedy is dying down.

//This makes her appear more threatening and influential compared to her more confined role as the mastermind of the Killing School Life in the first game.

//And there are more reasons than just this. Since Junko is already dead by the time Goodbye Despair begins, she becomes less of a direct antagonist and more of a haunting legacy, a force of despair that refuses to fade away. This shift gives her a mythic quality, as her influence looms over every event in the story, showcasing her obsession with cementing her place in history as an eternal agent of chaos. It’s no longer just about what she’s doing now, it’s about how far-reaching and inescapable her madness truly is.

//One of the reasons Junko shines brighter, or darker, rather, in Danganronpa 2 is the freedom her AI form grants her. Stripped of the limitations of her physical body, Junko fully leans into her larger-than-life persona, appearing in absurd and exaggerated digital forms.

//This form really advocates the idea that Junko is a living virus rather than a person. Her essence infects the virtual world, just as it infected the real world with Despair, in ways that make her feel omnipresent and almost godlike.

//This also allows her to interact with the cast in visually dynamic, surreal ways that simply weren’t possible in the more grounded setting of the first game. And as ridiculous as it is, the imagery of an absolutely HUGE AS FUCK Junko NEVER gets old.

//What really sets her apart in Danganronpa 2, though, is her personal connection to Class 77. These aren’t just random students she’s toying with; they’re the very people she manipulated, broke, and used as weapons during the Tragedy. She’s not merely taunting them, she’s forcing them to confront the darkest parts of themselves, the memories she erased, and the atrocities they committed under her influence.

//This makes her presence not only more menacing but deeply personal. The stakes feel higher because the conflict directly ties into the characters’ own identities and sense of guilt. Compared to the first game, where Junko’s relationship with Class 78 felt more detached and her villainy relied on spectacle rather than emotional stakes, her dynamic with Class 77 is far more engaging.

//What seals the deal is the eventual defiance of Class 77. When they choose to stand against Junko and reclaim their identities, it’s not just a victory over her philosophy, but it’s a victory over the very Despair she’s weaponized against them. This resolution gives her role in Goodbye Despair a sense of narrative closure that the first game didn’t quite achieve.

//She’s still the same chaotic, cartoony Junko, but here, her sadistic edge and personal ties to the cast create a version of her that feels more terrifying, more compelling, and, dare I say it, more entertaining than ever. It’s a much darker take on her character, and in this context, she’s far more convincing as the mastermind pulling the strings behind the scenes. It's a subtle shift that makes her presence feel less like a punchline and more like the horrifying force she was always meant to be.

//But I think that's mostly it for the outside context, and to cap this off, let's talk about the nitty-gritty details of the trial itself. I am sorry, but I will be repeating some of my previous points, just to cover them.

//But before diving into the labyrinthine twists and emotional sucker punches of Danganronpa 2's final trial, let’s start with one of the most hilariously sadistic Monokuma moments in the entire series. It's a subtle moment that doesn't last for very long, but it's a good sign right from the get go with the way that this trial treats it's most obvious plot twist right out of the gate in a way that is very entertaining.

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//Right at the beginning of the trial, Monokuma insists that everyone clarify one simple truth: the entire world they’ve been living in is a virtual reality. But instead of letting this revelation sink in gracefully, Monokuma drives it home with comedic precision.

//Every time someone tries to refute or question this revelation, he cuts them off with a deadpan repetition of "Because it’s a game!" over and over, reusing the same voice line for maximum effect. It’s like he’s saying, "This is the truth, and I am not debating this with you. Accept it, move on, or fucking die."

//It’s the kind of humor that is both maddening and brilliant, encapsulating Monokuma’s trademark blend of sadism and absurdity.

//Now let’s get to the meat of this trial: the twists. And oh, are there twists.

//First, as already established several times already, there’s the reveal that the world you’ve been inhabiting for the entire game isn’t even real. It’s a simulation.

//It's a very obvious twist if you'd bothered to pay ANY attention to the chapter, but that fact alone is a mind-blower. But the pièce de résistance is what comes next: the realization that the "World Ender," the ominous, evil-sounding organization you’ve been trained to despise and aim to destroy, are actually the good guys, and Chiaki and Monomi were working for them.

//The Future Foundation, the supposed villains of this story, are the heroes. And the bad guys? That would be…YOU! The very characters you’ve spent hours befriending and rooting for!

//I'm just gonna come straight out and say it: The Remnants of Despair are my ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE PLOT TWIST in this ENTIRE SERIES.

//Only two twists rival it for me: The Tragedy in Game 1, and the Protag switch in Game 3.

//When I first played this, I entered the final chapters with the mindset of a righteous avenger, ready to bring down the dastardly Future Foundation. But as the truth unraveled, I distinctly remember thinking, "Wait, what? We’re the bad guys? The organization trying to save the world isn’t evil, and we were the problem all along? What the actual hell is happening here!?"

//I just love how it flips the narrative on its head and forces you to confront a deeply uncomfortable truth: the characters you’ve grown attached to were once Junko Enoshima’s most loyal disciples, the infamous Remnants of Despair.

//Before, obviously, Danganronpa 3 went and ruined any tension and emotion we could have with that twist.

//But ignoring it, it's still great!

//Danganronpa 2 explains that the cast of characters were brainwashed into becoming Junko’s pawns of destruction. The simulation you’ve been playing through was created by the Future Foundation, including Makoto, Kyoko, and Byakuya from the first game, to rehabilitate them by erasing their memories and allowing them to live in a paradise free of Despair.

//The twist becomes even more gut-wrenching when it’s revealed that the killing game wasn’t part of the plan. It happened because an AI version of Junko was uploaded into the simulation, hijacking the entire system. Because she planned to take over the Remnant's bodies, and turn every person in Japan/the world, like her. Into Despair.

//Classic Junko plot, sure, and I know that a lot of you might disagree with the notion that this is the best twist, because some could argue that it is presented as so violent, it creates plot holes.

//What I mean specifically is the part where the Remnants salvaged Junko's corpse after the end of Game 1, and replaced their body parts with hers...

//...Also Mikan fucked it?

//But the problem there is that it creates a plot hole because Junko's body was crushed at the end of the execution, so there'd be no body to salvage.

//But the reason why I excuse it personally is because this is a plot hole OF A PLOT HOLE. Junko's execution had her going through every death trap she'd created in Danganronpa 1, all of which had killed the characters on their own. I know Junko is OP, but there's no way she's any more durable than Mondo, or any of the other characters who died here. Any one of these could have killed her at any point, and it made no sense that she survived all of them.

//And even putting that aside, assuming this IS a plot hole, it's not enough to ruin my enjoyment of the trial. Let me break it down for everybody:

//At the beginning of Danganronpa 2, the characters are portrayed as hapless victims trapped in a sadistic killing game. This setup fosters sympathy and camaraderie, much like the cast of the first game. However, the final twist subverts this perception entirely, revealing that these characters were not innocent victims but villains responsible for unspeakable atrocities as members of Junko Enoshima's Remnants of Despair.

//The stark contrast between their apparent innocence and their horrific past actions under Junko’s influence is nothing short of awesome, in a terrifying way, leaving an indelible mark. But this reveal isn’t just shocking for its content; it also serves as a brutal demonstration of Junko’s unparalleled ability to manipulate people into despair.

//The twist ties back to the catastrophic events of Danganronpa 1, Junko’s masterstroke of spreading despair globally. Here, the game goes further, showcasing the devastating depth of her evil by illustrating how she corrupted even the brightest students of Hope’s Peak Academy.

//And Danganronpa 3 enforces this idea, with Class 77 being quite possibly the most integral class to the school at the time, especially with the bond they form with Chiaki and Chisa, and how ripping that away from them was enough to completely break them.

//It's still not great, but I understand the basic implications at least.

//It’s a chilling reminder that Despair is insidious, capable of twisting even the most virtuous intentions into darkness. Junko’s role as the ultimate antagonist is cemented, her terrifying legacy casting a long shadow over the entire series.

//The twist also recontextualizes everything we’ve seen about the characters up to that point. Suddenly, Gundham’s theatrical fascination with death, Fuyuhiko’s violent streak and harsh demeanor, Nagito’s unhinged obsession with hope, and, most importantly, Mikan’s terrifying breakdown in Chapter 3 take on new, darker meanings.

//What were once quirky personality traits or personal flaws are revealed as remnants of their time as Junko’s followers. This added layer of depth makes the twist even more effective, turning each character into a tragic figure grappling with the scars of their past.

//Nagito, in particular, stands out as a character whose behavior becomes infinitely more complex in light of the reveal, especially because he learns the truth right before the trial in Chapter 4. His obsessive pursuit of Hope and simultaneous disdain for Despair now reads as deeply self-aware.

//He knows they are the Remnants of Despair, and he hates himself and his peers for it, and the way that this duality kind of mirrors the player's own conflicting feelings about the cast post-reveal, adding emotional weight to an already loaded twist. It adds an element of method to Nagito's madness.

//Moreover, the twist reinforces Danganronpa's overarching themes of Hope and Despair in ways that, I would argue, the first game didn’t quite achieve.

//The fact that the Remnants of Despair were once Hope’s Peak Academy’s shining symbols of hope adds a layer of profound tragedy. And their journey to reclaim their humanity and hope serves as a microcosm of the broader struggle between these two forces that defines the series. This isn’t just about saving the world, it’s about saving themselves.

//This thematic resonance ties directly into what makes the twist so powerful: it doesn’t just set the stakes for the trial, it sets the stakes for the entire Danganronpa series. The twist paves the way for an emotional and poignant redemption arc for the cast. Despite their horrifying past actions, these characters are given the chance to prove they are more than their despair. This struggle resonates deeply, emphasizing themes of growth, forgiveness, and the ability to move past one’s darkest moments.

//It’s why it’s such a shame we never got a spin-off series exploring the Remnants’ lives after the events of Danganronpa 3. I would have much rather watched THAT anime.

//Seriously, Mod Freeze and Mod Poi, thank you for doing the fandom’s work on this front.

//The integration of the Neo World Program into this twist is another stroke of subtle brilliance. What initially seemed like little more than a sci-fi backdrop for the killing game gains profound significance.

//The program isn’t just a high-tech gimmick, it’s a lifeline, a tool designed to erase despair and offer these characters a second chance. The twist aligns seamlessly with the game’s science-fiction elements, grounding the shocking reveal in a way that feels both logical and emotionally resonant.

//But above all else, what truly elevates this twist, though, are two key aspects: The juxtaposition of innocence and guilt, and the reinforcement of hope as a deliberate choice.

//The game plays on the player’s affection for the cast, built over hours of shared experiences, only to reveal their horrifying pasts. It forces one to grapple with complex questions about identity, culpability, and redemption. Can we separate who they are now from who they were under Junko’s influence? Should they be forgiven, and, more importantly, can they forgive themselves?

//By the end of the game, the characters confront these questions head-on. Rather than succumbing to Despair or clinging to a hollow version of Hope imposed by others, they choose to forge their own path forward.

//Hajime’s declaration that only they can decide their futures is a defining moment, encapsulating the game’s core message: Hope isn’t something you’re born with or handed, it’s something you actively choose. And this decision is all the more powerful because of the twist. It reaffirms the series’ ultimate thesis: Hope, like Despair, is a choice, but one that requires courage and conviction.

//It's just...very powerful. In almost every regard.

//However...it does fall a LITTLE flat in one regard for me. Not nearly enough to ruin it, because I do still LOVE this part of the twist, but it's something that we've already talked about, and something that I feel I need to share my concerns over.

//It's how Hajime, who was revealed to be a Reserve Student, slots into this whole thing.

//This is by far the most horrifying aspect of this twist, and one that really works for it, but the reality is that even though Junko ran this whole Killing Game, the fact is due to her AI status, she could not have done it by herself. After all, someone had to actually get her INTO the Neo World for her to host the Killing Game in the first place.

//Naturally, the big question arises: who uploaded this digital Junko? Enter the grand crescendo of this twist—the person responsible for all of this chaos is none other than…Hajime himself.

//But, of course, it’s more complicated than that. Hajime wasn’t acting as himself...It's revealed in this trial that Hajime wasn't just a random Reserve Course student, and there's a reason why he turned out to be the only survivor. He was, in actuality, Izuru Kamukura, an emotionless superhuman created by Hope’s Peak Academy to embody "Ultimate hope."

//As we later see in DR3, Junko and Mukuro manipulated Izuru, flipping him to the side of despair and effectively kickstarting the apocalypse. The revelation that the character you’ve been playing as is not only part of the problem but the problem is one of the darkest and most compelling twists in the series.

//Now, for starters, I want to say that I really like how well this twist slots into the greater lore of Danganronpa, and Izuru is a well-deserved part of the franchise.

//The Hope Cultivation Plan, and what Hope's Peak's Steering Committee actually DID to Hajime, hits like a ton of bricks because it completely flips everything you think you know about this guy, the school that this entire franchise is BASED ON, and even the concept of "Hope" itself, as well as the idea of Hope itself.

//Hajime, the seemingly ordinary and relatable protagonist, turns out to have undergone a horrifying transformation to become Izuru Kamukura, a superhuman "Ultimate Hope" with every talent imaginable. It strips away the idea that Hajime was just a regular guy thrust into extraordinary circumstances, and instead, his backstory reveals that he was a victim of Hope's Peak's ruthless experiments, sacrificing his entire identity for a twisted ideal of perfection. It's tragic, unsettling, and is especially harsh in the way that this was Hajime's "Hope" for the world, and Hope's Peak EXPLOITED him for it, so what does that Hope really mean?

//This twist also pulls back the curtain on Hope's Peak Academy, exposing its darker side. Up until this point, Hope's Peak is painted as a prestigious school that nurtures the best and brightest, but the Izuru Kamukura Project shows that it’s anything but noble.

//The school literally erased Hajime’s personality, emotions, and memories to create a living symbol of hope; and didn't tell him they were going to do that. And it feels like a process that feels more like something out of a dystopian horror story than a prestigious institution.

//It reframes Hope's Peak as a place driven not by ideals of nurturing talent but by exploitation and control, highlighting the hypocrisy of its mission.

//What makes it greater is that Junko even has a sick as fuck line in this trial that perfectly summarizes this, and how Hope can be dangerous in the way that what people actually define AS Hope, can easily turn out to be another person's (in this case, every other person EVER'S) Despair, and it's this line:

"Do you reaaaaaally hafta sacrifice yourselves to protect the world in the first place? What if the world's hope is different from your hope? Even if the world is happy, it's meaningless if you aren't happy."

//And not only does Makoto not have an immediate response to this line, but Hajime's later actions prove her to be RIGHT. And I feel like not a lot of people realize that this is the very basis that the Kamukura Project was founded on.

//The ENTIRE REASON Hope's Peak was founded was to create Izuru. Because they thought that he would be the Hope of the world. But Junko turned him into the world's Despair instead, and it was very easy because of Hope's Peak's moral corruption.

//The thing they saw as "Hope" was not what the rest of the world saw.

//What makes this twist even more impactful is how it recontextualizes the entire "Hope vs Despair" conflict in the series. Izuru, as the "Ultimate Hope," is depicted as so indifferent and detached that he ultimately finds no value in either ideal.

//This shows that striving for absolute hope can be just as damaging and dehumanizing as falling into despair. It adds a layer of nuance to the series’ central theme, suggesting that extreme ideals, no matter how well-intentioned, can lead to monstrous outcomes.

//And this twist, while not the most standard way to end a character arc, is the perfect cherry on top of Hajime's identity crisis arc.

//He starts as someone insecure about his lack of talent, someone who envies the Ultimates around him, and really falls into depression upon learning that he never had one in the first place.

//But then learning that he was surgically altered into a talent-filled, emotionless being makes his journey to reclaim his identity and humanity all the more powerful. Because he GOT the talent that he sought; just at the cost of everything else.

//By choosing to reject Izuru’s detached worldview and embrace the messy, imperfect reality of being Hajime Hinata, he shows that true strength doesn’t come from talent or perfection but from accepting and valuing yourself as you are. It’s an almighty aspect of a twist that deepens the story’s themes and makes Hajime’s eventual triumph over despair even more meaningful.

//And it's also largely thanks to Chiaki that Hajime was able to overcome this. And if there's one thing that I can credit Danganronpa 3 on, it's what they actually did with the dynamic between Izuru and Chiaki, and how it laid the groundwork for this resolution...PERFECTLY.

//Chiaki Nanami wasn’t just the heart of Class 77. She was also the pivotal force that led to the group’s victory in Danganronpa 2. And I cannot understate that the only reason they managed to attain this victory is because she broke the barriers to speak to Hajime one last time.

//I'm one of very few people who think that as a character, Chiaki is...KIND OF overrated. But just because she's overrated, that doesn't mean she's a bad character. And she IS important to the game. It's just not easy to see how until a lot later into it.

//Even after her tragic death in the Neo World Program, Chiaki's impact lingered. As the AI created to guide her classmates toward hope, she became the catalyst for their redemption. Her steady support, unwavering kindness, and ability to see the best in others made her a beacon of hope in a situation engineered to breed Despair.

//It’s no exaggeration to say that without Chiaki’s influence, the Remnants of Despair might never have found the strength to reclaim their humanity.

//And that doubles for real Chiaki in her brief interaction with Izuru in DR3.

//Junko made Izuru see the power of how Despair affected him, despite his boredom, and how it went against his preconcieved notions. But it was Chiaki's determination, willingness to keep going, and the love and Hope she had for people, despite the fact that she was facing a cruel and absolutely miserable death, that made him rethink things. That made him see the benefits in both sides.

//Had this scene not happened, Izuru would not have been such a neutrally aligned character in the end. He would have been just a straight-up monster of a villain.

//Which, if you think about it, is basically what Utsuro is. Utsuro didn't have a Chiaki. He never saw the benefits or the power of Hope. He was in Despair his whole life, and even after it. But this meant something to Izuru. The tears that showed Hajime was still somewhere in there, meant something.

//Izuru in tandem, Chiaki’s relationship with Hajime is particularly critical, both to the story of Danganronpa 2 and the broader series. From the moment they met, Chiaki believed in Hajime, even when he struggled to believe in himself.

//It obviously did not end well, but that was no fault of Chiaki's own.

//This bond between these two wasn’t just one of mutual respect and understanding, it was a reminder of the power of genuine connection, something the Danganronpa series constantly emphasizes. Hajime’s eventual deevolution into Izuru, and then his reclamation of himself as Hajime, is deeply rooted in the strength he drew from his connection with Chiaki.

//Furthermore, Chiaki didn’t just push Hajime to become the leader the group needed. She showed all of Class 77 that they could rise above their Despair by supporting each other. Her presence as an AI was a guiding force during the trials, and her ultimate sacrifice demonstrated what it meant to choose hope, even in the face of overwhelming odds. When Hajime rallied the group in the final moments of the game, it was as much a tribute to Chiaki as it was a declaration of their collective strength.

//Chiaki and Hajime’s story ripples across the series in profound ways. In Danganronpa 3, her role as a real person solidifies her influence. As the one classmate who never gave in to Despair, Chiaki became a symbol of hope not just for Class 77 but for the audience as well.

//Her loss was devastating, yet it was her memory that ultimately pushed Hajime and the others to fight for a better future. Chiaki wasn’t just a character; she was the embodiment of what Danganronpa is all about. The idea that even in the darkest times, Hope can find a way to shine.

//So with all of this to say, why is this still my least favourite part of the twist?

//It's largely because of Izuru himself, not because of what Hajime goes through, or because of Chiaki's connection to both him and Hajime.

//Do you know how long it takes to beat Danganronpa 2 on average?

//It takes, on average, 32.5 hours.

//Do you know how much screentime and attention Izuru is given in this game?

//Not including the repeat of the scene on the boat with Nagito that we see first from Izuru's perspective, and then from Nagito's, he's ON SCREEN for a total of around 2.5 minutes.

//Doing the math, and putting that into perspective for all of you, that means that Izuru is in Danganronpa 2 for roughly 0.13% of its full runtime.

//And by the way. Izuru first becomes a CONCEPT in THIS CHAPTER! He's not brought up, or eluded to, at ANY OTHER POINT in the game, besides one photograph of the original headmaster that he's named after. Something that has NOTHING to do with Izuru himself.

//Which means that in the main series, this is ALL OF HIS SCREENTIME!

//Danganronpa finale's have a tendency to randomly introduce plot points that never happened before. V3-6 is bad with it as well, especially because it shows a cutscene from earlier in the game that straight up DIDN'T HAPPEN.

//However, as mind-bogglingly terrifying as the Hope Cultivation Plan is, it is by far the WORST OFFENDER of this idea.

//And what makes it even worse is that a screentime that is THAT LIMITED means that Izuru does not get a chance to be an actual character.

//Danganronpa 3, Talent Development Plan, and Summer Camp later try to reprimand this by making Izuru an actual central character...Emphasis on TRIED.

//Okay, to be fair, in the bonus games, I do love seeing Izuru try to establish his own identity by interacting with Chiaki and co. However, it feels very ironic to me that the character who's catchphrase is "How Boring..." ends up being...really boring.

//At least as a character. As a concept, he's BRILLIANT. But as a character, he's nothing, and that's the whole point.

//This is what I was saying when I was talking about Utsuro before. Even though they are equally as stoic, Utsuro has a pretty well-structured personality, and backstory that makes him sympathetic. But Izuru is so one-dimensional, being a being comprised entirely of talent and nothing else, that he's just a function in the grand scheme of things.

//Utsuro is also present for only one trial, but he is in it for FAR LONGER than Izuru is, and he was foreshadowed MUCH better. The hints are, granted, very subtle, but they are still THERE. If you play DRA a second time, you will NOTICE them.

//Not with Izuru and the Hope Cultivation Plan. There's absolutely NOTHING for them.

//Izuru is one of those characters who feels like he should be compelling, but in practice, he falls flat because he’s so detached and lifeless that it’s hard to care about him. The idea of a person who’s been stripped of their identity and turned into a superhuman is fascinating on paper, but Izuru’s execution leaves a lot to be desired.

//He spends most of his time standing around, delivering cryptic one-liners, or just looking bored. While his apathy is supposed to be a reflection of the emptiness of ultimate talent, it ends up making him feel more like a plot device than an actual character.

//One of the biggest problems with Izuru is that he lacks agency or personal stakes in the story. He exists primarily as a shadow of Hajime’s past and a foil to Junko's chaos, but he doesn’t have any strong desires or goals of his own.

//His indifference to both Hope and Despair, how he's experienced the power of both sides though Junko and Chiaki respectively, might be thematically relevant, but it robs him of any drive or personality that would make him engaging. Even his interactions with Junko in the anime, which could have been a clash of two intellectual giants, come off as underwhelming because he just doesn’t seem to care about anything.

//Put simply, it’s hard to invest in a character who doesn’t invest in themselves.

//Another issue is that Izuru’s overpowered nature makes him unrelatable. He’s described as having every talent imaginable, to the point that nothing challenges or excites him. Again, to reiterate, this makes him feel less like a person and more like a concept, and concepts don’t make for compelling characters on their own.

//Even when he does take action, like helping to orchestrate the Tragedy, it feels hollow because his motives are so abstract. There’s no emotional weight behind his actions, so it’s hard to feel anything for him as a character.

//Ultimately, Izuru ends up being more of a plot twist delivery system than a fully realized individual.

//Granted, he is a FANTASTIC plot delivery system, but he’s there to show the dark side of Hope’s Peak Academy and to highlight Hajime’s journey of self-acceptance, and doesn’t stand on his own. Without a personal arc, meaningful relationships, or even a shred of humanity to ground him, he feels more like a missed opportunity than a compelling addition to the cast.

//He is INSANELY COOL as a concept.

//But JUST as a concept.

//Still, as I said, this doesn't stop the Remnant twist from being fantastic. If anything, it serves to double down on how fucked the situation is for the characters. It's the perfect way to pull it off a second time, just as impactful, if not moreso, from the way the first game did it.

//I just love that the game pulls NO punches in showing just how far gone the Remnants of Despair were under Junko’s influence. They didn’t just spread chaos and destruction; they mutilated themselves, committed unspeakable atrocities, and yes, there’s even an implication that some of them…had sexual inclinations toward Junko’s corpse.

//I mean, that one was probably Mikan mostly, given what we know about her now, but it could have been more than just her...

//It’s grotesque, horrifying, and deeply unsettling. A STARK contrast to the lovable, quirky personalities you’ve come to know over the course of the game. So while some aspects of this backstory strain believability, the sheer audacity of these revelations makes them unforgettable, and insanely entertaining.

//So after all of this, let's end it by talking about how the trial ends.

//The solution to defeating Junko isn’t choosing hope or despair. It’s rejecting both and forging your own future. It’s a thematic mic drop for the game, aligning perfectly with its sub-theme of learning from past mistakes and embracing personal growth.

//However, the way this idea is portrayed is peak anime absurdity. Hajime, now back in control of his identity, goes full-on Super Saiyan, screaming the word “Future!” at the top of his lungs until everyone agrees with him and Junko is silenced.

//It’s over-the-top, it’s ridiculous, it's...honestly kind of dumb, and it’s hard to take seriously. But somehow, it still sort of works.

//The sheer silliness of the moment doesn’t detract from its emotional impact; if anything, it makes the victory sweeter by providing a cathartic, if laughable, resolution to a deeply harrowing story.

//And Junko's defeat here is a lot more satisfying than it is in Game 1. Unlike with then, you actually feel like you've beaten her once and for all, and this wasn't part of her grand master plan; especially because in order to beat Junko in a conflict that settles on Hope and Despair, finding a way out that doesn't necessarily aquait to either, is the perfect way to end it.

//So...yeah...This is my fourth favourite trial in the series, and absolutely my favourite ending.

//Despite its occasional reliance on exposition dumps and its plot holes , the final trial of Game 2 is a masterclass in storytelling twists and emotional payoff. It takes the series’ penchant for high-stakes drama and amps it up to eleven, delivering a finale that is equal parts disturbing, thought-provoking, and outrageously entertaining.

//The blend of personal stakes, thematic depth, and anime absurdity cements this trial as one of the franchise’s most memorable moments.

//God bless you Danganronpa 2.

#danganronpa survivor #danganronpa #danganronpa 2 #dr2 #mod talks #ranking #hajime hinata #fuyuhiko kuzuryu #akane owari #sonia nevermind #chiaki nanami #kazuichi soda #makoto naegi #kyoko kirigiri #byakuya togami #alter ego junko #junko enoshima #dangancember 2024 #Youtube

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marcholasmoth · 7 months ago

Text

OSRR: 3596

today was my momma's birthday! she turned 70 today.

today i ended up going with momma to walmart and getting a bunch of stuff. we walked around the store and i had an increasingly hard time walking because - you guessed it! - my heel hurt!

honestly i don't know why i don't just have it in my file to never see that doctor. she doesn't listen to me. ever. it wastes my time and money and it's fucking terrible. i practically couldn't waste that money worse than this - if i gave it to just about anyone else it'd be beneficial and not a waste! god i hate that woman. what's the point of being a doctor at all if you're not going to fucking listen to your patients???

anyway.

while we were out, though, mom and i were walking along the back wall past the shoe section, and we spotted some slider sandals, the first of which that caught my eye were DBZ. my mom first saw the spongebob ones, but since i would rather have my retinas disconnect again than own spongebob merchandise, i was happy to point out the other kind i saw next to them - naruto ones.

so mom got me naruto sliders which are wicked comfy and will be great if my foot doesn't heal the way it should.

mom and i spent the afternoon watching some more episodes of the flash, before i went and made us dinner and brought it back up. we watched the end of a season of the great british baking show and then plopped the flash back on before it was time for bed.

nothing from joel today, but the man (1) needs his space and (2) usually has a game on tuesdays. i let him breathe. he lets me breathe. living together full time will be interesting, but nice - i'll get to cuddle with him and talk to him even on work nights because eventually i will be working a job with normal hours. inshallah i will get a normal hour job.

below is a bunch of stuff about my relationship with my mom. you don't need to read it if you don't want.

it was nice to just spend time with my mom without any other pressure or whatever. i think it's fun to spend time with her. she's silly. i love my mom a lot. yes our relationship at its core is complicated, and yes there are a lot of things that she's done that i resent. i won't deny that. and i know the argument of "but she's my mom" isn't always a good one because of one thing or another, depending on the situation. but even after all of that, i still love my mom. our relationship has improved since i've been out of the house more and more, and i'm confident that's why this is my perspective. but i love my mom. i like spending time with my mom. no she won't know everything unless she gets real cool with a lot of things real fast, but having a good relationship is a damn good start.

the older i've gotten the more i understand her actions, the choices she's made, the decisions she makes, the more i understand her as a person. which is nice to be able to do. understanding and relating are two different things but i can translate what she says and does into something i can understand - usually. of course the differences in communication leave her angry and me overwhelmed because she's NOT clear when she communicates and i am trying to bridge the gap she leaves, but i often do an okay job. but she has a short temper when it comes to asking questions and getting answers and then the answers i give are unsatisfactory. which is frustrating. "what do you think of _____?" if i don't say anything i am thinking??? what do you want me to do, keep useless information and analysis on file??? nah. "do you want chicken parm for dinner?" no, because i don't like chicken parm. i never have. i have been your child for 31 years. you should know that i don't like chicken parm.

so it's shit like that that drives me fucking bonkers. and if i'm short back she gets defensive which is also fucking annoying, so whatever, it is what it is. i try to control my tone as best i can. whether or not it works is a different question.

this turned into a long discussion of my mom and that's not really what i was aiming for today, but it is what it is.

in spite of all of it, i still love my mom. i'm glad she's still here to help me, when i have hard times or when i need advice. and i'm glad i can be present to temper her attitude toward others because good lord that woman is a nightmare of judging.

so i continue to keep the peace. 31-and-a-half-plus-years running.

#molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #3000s #3500s #sunshine boy

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andromedasummer · 3 years ago

Note

Hello! I'm very new to fe and I was just wondering if you could explain what you think will go down if Ticktum and Lotterer crash? I know what Ticktum said about overtakes and I've established that Andre has an.... Assertive™ style of driving sdfghjkk but why exactly is it going to be a shit show? Is it just because they're going to butt heads or will it lead to a conversation about safe driving in fe in general or something? Feel free to ignore, I'm just curious on your take on things

Andre is a fucking terrorist that has hit pretty much half the grid but he has never hurt anyone. Its so common the drivers themselves use the term "lotterered". A lot of people get riled up when it happens (Sam, Antonio)

But the thing is they make up. Pretty much all the drivers are very very good friends. Whole grid + commentators. This isn't the fandom style fanfic shit you get when f1 fandomizes the drivers relationships. its absurdly and weirdly real. They share beds while half naked, attend parties as a group. They often talk about their group chat they keep with all the drivers and many ex-drivers they are still friends with. When Daniel Abt (ex-driver fired under cruel conditions) is on track for commentary they interrupt his interviews by shouting his name and coming over for chats. These guys could be yelling at each other in the pitlane and an hour later lounging in the airport together waiting for a delayed plane making insta stories (true story). Hell when Oliver Rowland had his son, both the London E-prixs (his home races) happened, so he showed up to the track and visited the garages to show everyone his 9 day old baby. The thing that sticks out in my mind more than anything is Diriyah last year, when Alex Lynn and Sam collided and had a huge spat. Next day, Alex and Mitch collided and Alex's car was sent flying into the air, flipped, landed on its roof and skidded like 10-20 meters down the track. Mitch (who was not damaged, still in the race and Sams teammate) drove to where Alex was and got out of the car to help get him out, ending his race while he was in the points (i believe). And the conflict between Alex and Sam wasn't touched on or even remembered after that because what was more important to Sam and Mitch (who were in feeder together with Alex, along with Robin, Palmer, Stoffel etc) was that Alex was (somehow) uninjured and the race ended with everyone okay.

This close bond is due to a number of things. Most these guys grew up together in feeder, sometimes living together or being in the same friend group. Some of them were mistreated by the same sport or team (red bull usually) and found support in other drivers and formula e. I'd challenge anyone to find a bond between two drivers as strong as JEV and Andre. Or a series where the drivers love their commentators as much as FE love Dario and Jack, who go to dinner with them/do silly challenges with them a LOT.

Dan has

1. A reputation for aggressive crashes that have hurt people

2. A very firey temper. He doesn't know any of the FE guys well and does not have the history or repore the rest of the grid has. And most importantly he

3. Has never been positive about Formula E (similar to how Stoffel has a bi-annual cry in an article about the sport) which is a big no-no for a lot of the drivers, because to discount it is to discount their skill and driving when the reality is they didnt end up in staying other motorsport because of junior program fuckery, mental health problems or money problems. With Dans collision with Antonio, who is literally the most well liked guy on the grid and a respected champion of the sport, Dan is not off to a good start to say the least.

When Dan and Andre come together— and they will come together, your Lotterering in this series is inevitable— it will be nasty. Dan has a backbone, I will give him that. He doesn't back down and is happy to go off on social media. Andre is used to that. And hes a shit. He will rile Dan up, he will like memes about Dan on twitter. And if Dan continues to disparage the series, crash with other well liked drivers and just be himself in general, chances are JEV and some other drivers will take Andres side.

#formula e #fe #sorry for the long post #the formula e lore goes DEEP

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jojothaho · 3 years ago

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Home Late. Haitani brothers + Sanzu & Hanma.

Word count: 1,156

Request: Their reaction to their s/o coming home late from a party/being dropped off by a guy.

Warnings : Borderline nsfw, Sanzu being kinda abusive??

Mdni

Ran

⚜ After a work party had dragged on a little too long, you knew you needed to get home. And because it was so late, you caught a ride home with one of your co-workers.

⚜ When you finally pulled up to your house, you looked out of the window and saw Ran sitting on the porch, sporting a very unamused look on his face. Boom, Instant sobriety. You rushed out of the car and sent your friend on his way, then hastily padded up the steps to the porch.

⚜ "Ran I'm-" He gave you a look and you piped down instantly, nervousness bubbling in the pit of your stomach. If there was any worry in his eyes, it was long gone, only anger in its stead.

"What time were you supposed to be home?"

⚜ You gulped.

"11 pm."

"What time is it now?"

"1:48 am."

⚜ He rested his chin in his hand.

"And who drove you home just now?"

⚜ If you didn't answer correctly here, you knew things could go very wrong.

"That was nobody, he's just a coworker who offered to drive me home!"

"He?" Fuck.

"Well, yes bu-"

"Don't speak anymore."

⚜ You winced at the harshness in his tone.

"His license place is QIG519, right?"

⚜ The color drained from your face. Not trusting your own words, you nodded.

"Okay darling, I need you to tell me, would you prefer "he" takes the punishment, or you?"

⚜ You dropped your head in defeat, knowing there was nothing you could do to avoid Ran's wrath.

"Me."

"Strip."

⚜ Shocked, you looked up at him, hoping that you misheard, but there was only expectancy in his expression.

⚜ So you stripped, eyes welling with tears as you did what you were told. But you couldn't deny the heat and humiliation that started to collect at your core. When you finished, Ran grabbed your hips and sat you down on his knee, slightly bouncing it.

"For every minute that you were out late, you will sit out here, bare on my lap."

Rindou

⚜ After a tiring day of work, you were finally about to go home. Until your boss asked you for five hours of overtime. You knew the request was outrageous, but never being able to say no was one of your worst qualities.

⚜ So, another five hours went by, and you were finally home, courtesy of your boss dropping you off. When you pushed open the door of your shared home, you came to face your boyfriend Rindou, sitting on the couch.

"Y/n, why are you home so late?"

⚜ Rindou's voice was calm, and it mirrored his expression. His demeanor was unsettling, like it was a carefully crafted facade.

"It was work baby. My boss asked me for five hours of overtime." You excused, hoping it was enough.

⚜ He probably would've accepted your excuse, after all, work is work. If only your phone hadn't rung with a call from your boss, at 2 am.

⚜ The poor man was only calling to make sure you got in your house, but here you were, a moaning mess, bent over your dining table, getting the shit smacked out of your ass; While on a voice call with your boss.

"Isn't this a fitting punishment baby? Maybe now you'll think twice before you have men dropping you off at my doorstep at 2 fucking am."

Sanzu

⚜ Work today was hard; It was one of those days. One of those days where you needed a drink, no, drinks.

⚜ You sat at the bar your entire time, knowing your boyfriend, it was best not to interact with anyone. But that didn't mean people didn't interact with you.

⚜ The entire night, you were dodging thirsty men and women. But when you finally decided to leave, one persistent man wouldn't stop following you. When you broke the news that you had a boyfriend, he quit, but still offered to drive you home. You agreed, after all, it was late, and you were tipsy. Sanzu would understand, right? You've never been more wrong in your life.

⚜ When you stepped into the house, it was pitch black. huh? That's odd, usually, Sanzu would be up around this time. But you ignored it, assuming that he must've taken an early night.

⚜ You whistled and padded around the floor until a rough hand locked around your neck and slammed you against the nearest wall; So hard it made your head spin and throb in pain. Terrified couldn't even begin to describe what you were feeling.

⚜ If you didn't hear Sanzu's voice, you probably would've pissed yourself.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow your brains right now."

⚜ You were delirious, even incapable of forming proper sentences.

"I-I don't..? Sanzu..."

"Since you can't seem to talk right now, I'll tell you what you did wrong."

"After you got off of work, you went to a bar. You didn't let me know where you were, and then you let some man drop you off at my house, at 4 in the morning."

"Does that sound about right to you princess?"

"I'm sorry Haru!" You choked out, body falling limp in his hold.

"No princess, You're not sorry yet, but you will be soon. And so will your new friend"

⚜ The buzz of the alcohol was long gone, instead, anxiety and dread slipped into its place.

Hanma

⚜ It seemed like you were drifting from your friends lately, so when they asked you to go out, you couldn't say no, even though you were supposed to be home.

⚜ It was such a blast, you completely forgot the time, and your boyfriend.

⚜ So when you finally stumbled up to your front door, head pounding and fingers trembling from the cold, you were unpleasantly surprised.

⚜ The door wouldn't open all the way. Huh? You knew Hanma was home, the lights were all on. Then why was the security chain locked? Oh.

⚜ You banged on the door, knowing full well Hanma knew you were outside.

"Hanma, let me in! Lets talk about this, its fucking 15° outside!"

⚜ If you knew you were going to be locked outside of your house at 3 am, you would've worn thicker clothes; The thin coat you wore wasn't enough.

"You better be quiet doll, you don't want to wake up the neighbors now do you?"

⚜ Hanma spoke coldly through the crack, then went as fast as he came.

⚜ Your blood ran cold, and if it was from the freezing conditions outside or the lack of empathy in your boyfriend's tone, you didn't know. You knew you weren't getting inside the house without suffering for your actions today.

⚜ Freezing and desperate, you curled into yourself, trying to preserve as much heat as possible. Maybe you should've never gone to that party.

⚜ About an hour later, just beneath consciousness, you felt Hanma come outside and carry you into the house. You were too tired, too cold. But you might've heard,

"I'm not that cruel."

#Ran Haitani #Ran #Ran x reader #rindou haitani #Rindou #rindou x reader #Sanzu #sanzu haruchiyo #Sanzu x reader #Shuji #Shuji hanma #Hanma x reader #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #ran haitani x reader #Rindou haitani x reader #Sanzu haruchiyo x reader #Shuji hanma x reader

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sxdmoonchxld · 4 years ago

Text

Proven Wrong | KTH

Taehyung x reader

Words: 4k+

Genre: smut

Warnings: Rough Sex, Oral Sex, Fingerfucking, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Cunnilingus, Begging, Multiple Orgasms, Very Big Dick Tae, Like Scary Big, Like Gut Splitting Big, Unrealistic Sex, Belly Bulge, Bad Dirty Talk, Unprotected Sex, Gets A Little Dubious Consent Towards The End

Summary: You call his dick small. He proves that it’s not, by wrecking your pussy ;)

a/n: again i use to be lizardsocial. this was my most popular story on here so im bringing it back as well. i think you can find the original one on here somewhere. i don’t expect it to get half as many notes it did the first time but thas okai. i’ve edited kinda heavily so it's a little different from the original. its filthier. anywhos. Enjoy!

__________________________________________

Loud music blasted throughout your apartment, the rumbling bass from the speakers reverberated through your bedroom walls. Pictures and posters rippled with each vibration, struggling to retain their original position. You groaned in annoyance, you honestly thought your request was quite simple. Just a couple of hours. 120 minutes of quietness was all you asked for so that you could study for your upcoming calculus test. He knew how important this exam was to you. He evened 'pinky promise, cross your heart hope to die'. That he would give you the silence needed to stay focused. And everyone knew you don't break a pinky promise.

Even now in your annoyance, his voice still played on a constant loop in your head.

"Oh! Yea ___, not a problem. I can keep it quiet for you. So don't you worry a hair on your pretty little head!" Taehyung had said, waving his hand in the air feigning nonchalance.

That cute signature boxy smile of his planted face. You actually thought that for once he would keep his word, and you could get some precious studying time, but no. The tiny 2-bedroom shared apartment was full of heavy jazz music and high-pitched shrieking from what sounded like a cat being skinned alive. Who even listens to jazz music when trying to fuck?

The last thread of patience had now been pulled too thin and finally snapped. Your desire to study was gone with the wind, and in its place, irritability and wrath began to take root. You slammed your laptop closed and threw it to the end of the bed along with your papers and textbook. Jumping out of bed, you stomped your way out of the bedroom, eyes searching frantically for your target.

"Taehyung!" You yelled once you began to process the scene that was in front of you. The living room was in shambles, Taehyung's phone was hooked up to the speaker, the volume loud enough you swore angels in heaven could hear. An empty soda bottle, chip bags and clothes littered the floor. Don't even get you started on the couch pillows! Your one of a kind thrift finds were strewn all over the place. You felt your blood pressure rising, the vein at your temple fattening in rage and pulsing wildly. Your jaw threatening to ache from how hard you were grinding your teeth out of anger.

Your eyes investigated the vicinity for Taehyung and low and behold there he was on the now bare couch. Lying underneath him was the source of the vexatious screeches. He was dry humping on some random chick with his mouth fiercely attached to her neck, deep purple bruises vivid from where you stood across the room. You rolled your eyes at the pair. You knew damn well Taehyung's thin lips and weak thrusts didn't call for all that useless screaming.

You stomped over to the speaker, your sock padded feet slapping against the hardwood floor, and yanked the cord from the wall. Already the apartment was halfway quiet except for the banshee that was still squawking her head off.

"Hey! Shut the fuck up with all that noise!" You roared, scaring the girl and finally bringing their attention to your heated figure. Taehyung separated his lips from the girl's neck with a wet smack dislodging himself from between her spread thighs.

"Y/n, so nice of you to join us. How is studying going?" Taehyung spoke with a grin plastered on his handsome face. You resisted the urge to reach out and slap it off. He knew that you couldn't or anybody for a fact, could study with all the noise that was just previously filling the confines of the apartment. Yet here he was playing with the smidge of patience you had left by trying to simulate naiveté.

"All I asked was for you to be silent so that I could study for my upcoming test, and you said that you would. But instead, I am interrupted by your noisy ass music. Jazz music at that and this bitch here screaming at the top of her lungs!" You growled out between clenched teeth. The female gasped at your words embarrassment transforming her features, while Taehyung sat there with a blank look on his face, apparently unamused with your little rant.

"Oh my! Please excuse my rude roommate Mino. Obviously, her parents forgot to teach her basic manners. Let me walk you to the door." Taehyung spoke his fluffy curls swaying with the shakes of his head. A look of disappointment aimed your way as he began helping her gather her things and walking her to the front door.

"Umm, actually my name is Mina." She corrected Taehyung, but you could see it on his face that he could care less about the girl's name. Taehyung looked at her for a few seconds, as if he was processing the correct information of the girl's name.

"Yeah. Mona, that's what I said, isn't it?" Taehyung deadpanned, pushing her through the front door. Mina huffed at the fact that Taehyung continued to get her name wrong. You observed the pitiful interaction as you began to clean up the mess they made. You could tell from the look in Mina's eyes that she wanted more with Taehyung, but you knew that would never happen. Taehyung was a manwhore, a fuckboy, man thot, whatever the preferred term was. He had a new girl every night, and if he did try the whole "relationship smorgasbord" as he called it. The relationship usually didn't last for more than a week, before he was on to his next conquest.

"Tae?" You questioned meekly.

"Hmm?" He hummed head-turning slightly in your direction.

"Why do you do these things to me." You were genuinely curious as to why he made it his mission to push your every button. This wasn't the first time his action has hindered you from completing an important task. You just didn't understand why he chose to make your life more complicated than it already was.

"Awe is little __ j-jealous?" Taehyung taunted in a high-pitched voice used to entertain babies or puppies.

"Huh?!" You gasped choking on your saliva. Shit, you almost gave yourself whiplash with how fast you swung your neck to make full eye contact.

"Did you wish that was you, I was grinding on?" Taehyung continued to taunt as he walked into the kitchen to rinse his mouth out with water. That Mina girl had put way too much perfume on her neck. Now he was left with a sour aftertaste in his mouth. It tasted cheap, and Taehyung didn't do cheap.

If he was sincere with himself, he did wish it was you he was giving all his attention instead of these random girls. He considered you cute and innocent, with an air of sexiness. That he was pretty sure you weren't conscious of. In all actuality, Taehyung was smitten with you from the first time he saw when you came to ask about the roommate needed sign he had posted. The cute little freshman with a quirky personality and full of ambition. Those first 10 minutes of meeting you had him sprung like no other. You were way different from the usual girls he was used to. Which shouldn't be much of a surprise since most just wanted to fuck, have money spent on them. Oh! Of course, the bragging rights, that they actually got to fuck THE Kim Taehyung.

Don't get him wrong, there had been a countless amount of times he had tried to gain your attention. But you were too busy holed up in your room with your pretty little head stuck in a book to give him the time of day. So instead Taehyung reverted back to his middle school ways and chose to torment and irritating you as a way to receive some type of reaction from you. He would take whatever he could get, he was becoming that desperate.

"What exactly did I have to be jealous of? You do know she was faking it right? I didn't think you to be so naive Tae, because you and I both know that them thin ass lips-" You stopped to point at the box that made up his mouth. "And that speck in your pants that you call a dick can't make anyone scream." You declared assuredly, moving your pointer finger down to his crotch. Pride and confidence swelled in your chest at the insult thrown at him. 'Good one __'

Taehyung spat out the water he was swishing around in his mouth and whipped his head in your direction. Did you just stand there and try to insult his manhood? Nah, clearly his hearing had to be a little off, right?

"Excuse me, what did you just say? My ears must be failing me." Taehyung said wiping the stray droplets of water from his mouth, sticking a finger in his ear to loosen the imaginary earwax there. Amused, he sauntered towards you, a ghost of a smirk rising on his face.

"You heard me, Mr.Kim. Your micropenis couldn't pleasure anything but your hand if even that." You said backing up, as he prowled closer to you, his shoulder in a tense bunch raised close to his ears. Any amusement his face could have held was gone, in its place was a dark, unreadable expression. His mouth fixed in a firm line, and the tip of his ears blossomed red. Flames of anger and lust flashing in his chocolate eyes.

"My sweet __, nothing about me is little. I can guarantee that." Taehyung growled out, his already deep voice deepened in tone. You scoffed trying to portray indifference but continued backing away from his advancing until your back made contact with the wall. Shit.

Taehyung placed his hands beside your head, caging you in. Your eyes fluttered softly as you breathe in his rich cologne encased your senses, dark, woodsy with just a hit of a floral note. His eyes roamed your face, taking in your features before settling on your lips. You self-consciously licked them before tucking them between your teeth. Taehyung leaned his face closer to yours.

"Such a pretty little mouth you have. Has anyone told you how troublesome it could be though?" Taehyung questioned, his thumb on his left coming up to your upper lip.

You could feel your heart beating against your ribcage, feel your cheeks heat up, and dare you say; a gush of wetness in the seat of your boy shorts. The sexual tension was too powerful for your weak defences. Against your better judgment, you let your eyes flutter closed, and lips pucker expectantly anticipating the moment his lips would meet yours. Except Taehyung had other plans.

He shifted his head to the right, placing a gentle kiss on the lobe of your ear. Slowly moving his lips up to the outer shell of your ear.

You couldn't help the surprised moan that left your mouth as you unconsciously tilted your head back, offering your neck to his probing advances.

"Would you like me to prove you wrong?" Taehyung challenged in a whisper. His deep voice sending shocks of pleasure zinging down your spine. He trailed his lips down your neck, pressing gentle kisses against the surface. You had to choke back the moan that threatened to escape you at the feeling of his soft lips on your neck.

"N-no, Taehyung." You panted breathlessly.

"I don't feel like finding my glasses to look at something too small for the naked eye to see." You spoke, resolute on getting in one last insult. Taehyung pulled his face away from your neck, growling at your words.

"Haha, hilarious." He laughed humorously.

He pulled your body away from the wall, hoisted you up over his shoulder with a small grunt, and made his way to his bedroom. Kicking the door open before unceremoniously throwing you on his plush king-sized bed. 'Not good'.

Taehyung stood at the edge of the bed staring at you with unadulterated lust clouding his eyes. His chest heaved heavily with anger or arousal, you weren't sure. But based on the sizable tent in his pants, you could guess the latter.

"Taehyung! I already told you I don't want to see your baby-." You started but was cut off by Taehyung grabbing your ankles and pulling you roughly to the edge of the bed, pouncing on you. His lips met yours in a kiss that stole your breath away. The kiss was sensual and firm, but you could tell he was holding back.

Taehyung snaked his hand up your body, and into your hair, giving it a sharp tug. You gasped at the slight pain giving him a clear path to ease his tongue into your mouth, coiling itself around your own, deepening the kiss further. He thoroughly explored your mouth not leaving one surfaced untouched by his tongue, greedily swallowing your needy moans. Fuck he tasted good. Like oranges and burnt sugar.

Taehyung detached from your mouth to remove his shirt and to help you remove your tank top as-well. Your nipples pebbling from the chilly air and arousal. His eyes studied your body, you wanted so badly to shield yourself away from his unwavering stare.

"You're so beautiful. I've waited so long for this." Taehyung whispered before attacking your throat with kisses. You whined out in pleasure, your hips bucking up with every love bite he delivered, your body was aching in need for more.

"Tae. P-please more. G-give me m-more." You keened in between pants of air.

Your hips now undulated in tiny circles as Taehyung trailed his kisses down your neck, to your breast. He sucked and bit the soft skin around your nipple lightly. Soon his tongue gently wrapped around your nipple, sucking it into his warm mouth, while his hand teased the other breast, kneading and pinching your nipple. Your moans were increasing in volume, at his assault.

Your legs widened on their own accord, making more room for Taehyung. Your pussy was weeping profusely. The boy shorts you were wearing were thoroughly drenched, and with each movement of your hips, your arousal perfumed the air. Releasing your nipple, he continued his way down your chest, moving his lips across your stomach. Down, down he goes until he's kissing you down to where your torso joins your pelvis. He trained his eyes on you, eager to see your reaction as he pulled your boy shorts off from your body with a wet smack.

"Tell me what you want love. Use your big girl voice for me." Taehyung cooed in a provoking tone. You would have told him to fuck off if it wasn't for his mouth hovering right over your clenching core, his hot breath attacking your pussy lips.

"Cat got your tongue? You sure did have a lot of things to say earlier." Taehyung teased once more. You moaned with each word he said, your hips thrusting upwards, hoping to find his mouth.

"Please! Just touch my pussy, lick it, do something! Stop teasing me!" You urged, bringing your hands up to stimulate your breast, you didn't know how much more teasing you could take. You could feel your essence seeping between your ass cheeks and coating the bed. The dull ache in your stomach was intensifying, and he had barely touched you.

"Mmm, well since you begged nicely." Taehyung replied, wasting no time in attacking your pussy. His broad tongue licked wide strips up against your pussy. Splitting your lips with the appendage with each pass to dip his tongue into your pulsating hole. Your hands found his soft brown hair as your back arched off the bed, pushing your cunt deeper into his face.

"Y-yeahfuck! Like that it's so good!" You whined slurring your words.

Taehyung shifted his probing muscle's attention to your clit, attacking it with kitten licks. You shouted loudly, as your thighs were beginning to shake. The coil in your stomach tightening almost painfully. He wrapped his strong arms around your thighs, your knees were hitched higher up almost touching your chest in this position.

But this way, he had much more leverage to devour you. The comforter on his bed bunching uncomfortably beneath your ass but at this moment you gave zero fucks. Taehyung had total control now, showing no remorse as your upper body thrashed about on the bed. Your hands were no longer able to reach his hair, so you opted for your own instead, pulling harshly on your roots.

"Fuck, Taehyung!" You wailed shrilly. Taehyung chuckled at the sounds you were making, remembering your words from earlier he couldn't wait to hear what you sounded like taking his dick.

He then rubbed two thick fingers in the abundance of fluids that your pussy was producing and gently eased them into your tight core.

"Not only is baby girl surprisingly noisy, but she's also pretty tight too." You clenched even more around his fingers, your wall throbbing wildly around them.

"I can't wait to feel you around my dick." Taehyung moaned sucking your clit into his mouth, delivering hard sucks as his fingers pumped into you at a moderate speed. Sadly, the introduction of his fingers was your undoing. You couldn't help as your legs stuck straight in the air. Body arching off the bed and bowed forward as your orgasm hit you like a freight train knocking the wind from your lungs.

Your eyes were shut tightly, and your mouth hung open in a silent scream as your body convulsed from the intensity of your orgasm. Taehyung had a hard time holding you down but continued his assault on your creaming pussy. He slurped as much of your cream as he could, absolutely addicted to the way you tasted.

"T-Tae, stop-p." You called out to him pathetically. Your intense orgasm had passed, but he was still thrusting shallowly inside your tight core, lapping at your clit. The oversensitivity was becoming too much, as you struggled to wiggle away from him. Taehyung withdrew his fingers and ceased his licking with one last kiss on your clit, making you flinch at the contact.

Taehyung beheld your fucked out appearance with pride. Your legs splayed open, displaying your spasming cunt. The way your chest was swiftly rising and falling as you struggled to catch your breath. Your hair stood up in every direction from your previous pulling, body trembling with aftershocks, and all he did was eat you out and finger you.

"Wow." You mumbled your eyes closing, sleep trying to claim you.

"Oh, nonono. I'm not done with you yet." Taehyung proclaimed, flipping you onto your stomach. He had to admit he was the hardest he had ever been in his life. His pants were now unbearably tight, and a wet spot at the crotch of his pants started to become visible. Taehyung tugged the offending material off hissing as his massive erection made contact with the air, free from being confined. You lifted yourself with jelly arms onto your knees, wanting to see what the commotion was behind you.

You choked on your spit for the second time today, as your eyes made contact with the angry red monster Taehyung called his cock. Not only was he unbelievably thick; a little bigger than your wrist, but he was also long. In his hands was the living definition of a third leg. He was crazy if he actually thought that would fit inside of you?

"Fuck that shit!" You cursed trying to scramble to the headboard of the bed, but Taehyung halted your escape, grabbing your ankles and yanking you back.

He would have laughed at your reaction, but he was too turned on, there was so much blood rushing to his cock he felt lightheaded. He wasted no time in putting you back in your previous position. Pulling your ass up so that it was sticking in the air and your torso was lying flat on the bed, his hands gripping your hips hard enough to bruise.

"Tae! Wait...you can't be serious!" You tried pleading with him terrified that thing he called his dick was going to tear you apart.

"Not so little am I baby?" He snickered

Don't worry, you can take it I'll go slow." Taehyung groaned his voice strained, his arousal was beginning to take a toll on him. Taehyung grabbed his shaft and brought the bulbous tip of his cock to rub against your clit. You mewled with pleasure, his tip was hot and the pre-come he was leaking added to the sensation of relaxing and reigniting your body.

Taehyung continued to stroke his tip along your clit thoroughly coating it with your thick fluids. He placed the thick head at your entrance, your juices helping him to slide in. He watched in amazement as your leftover cum gather around the head of his cock in a coating out creamy white. Your body tensed up at the massive intrusion, your cunt pulsated wildly around him, drawing a deep groan from his throat.

"Baby relax, you're squeezing so tight." Taehyung moaned out affected by your spasming core. He reached his hand underneath your body and strummed at your clit once again, coxing you to relax.

Taehyung took your distraction as his cue to shove the offending length inside your prone pussy. You squealed at the sudden fullness and intense burning. Bucking your hips, trying to dislodge him. It was too much to take, especially at this position. Your pussy was going to rip in half.

"B-bi-iig-g. To-o mu-ch." You whined out stuttering horribly.

Taehyung gripped your hips harder to stop your fitful twisting and bucking. He felt as though he was about to explode you were so damn tight and wet, your bucking didn't help his case any either. He didn't wait this long to finish early. He refused to be a one pump chump. Taehyung reached his hand back underneath your body to locate your clit, rubbing it in firm tight circles, to help relax you, and sure enough; like magic, after you adjusted to his massive size, your body was suddenly filled with mind-numbing pleasure. Your whimpers turned into loud groans as you threw your hips back onto Taehyung, giving him the okay to start moving.

"Hell yeah. That's it, baby girl work this tight little cunt on my cock." He grunts before he withdrew his length and slammed back in, his dick splitting your sensitive walls, hitting every spot inside your clenching cunt. His strokes were fast, broad, and powerful, never had you felt so full in your life. Your mouth was gaped open, as shrieks of pleasure fell from your jaws, drool dripped from your lips, and dots blurred your vision. You could feel him in your guts, branding himself inside you. The coil in your stomach was quickly tightening, ready to release what was no doubt, going to be the most intense orgasm your body was about to experience. Taehyung could feel your core tightening up further, your tight little pussy was far better than he could have expected, he wanted to punch himself for waiting this long to indulge in you.

"You're taking this big cock so well, baby. Such a good girl." Taehyung growled.

"But I have a secret to tell you." You shivered as he stopped mid-stroke. You felt the warmth and damp skin of his torso drape over your back. Like pudding in his hands. You didn't even flinch as he brought his large callused hands up through the part in your breast to wrap around your throat.

Ever so slightly he squeezed the sides of your neck, you felt him throb in your stomach as you clenched even tighter around him at the action. Slowly he lifted your head up with his hand still on your neck. Again he squeezed. Bringing his lips down to your ear, he said, "Would you believe me if I said you're only taking half of me in."

The way your jaw dropped and your eyes bugged out of your head would have been comical. If you weren't genuinely terrified, that is.

"O-nly half! That's impossible I swear your touch my small intestine already." You tried to look back to see if he was lying or not, but he tightened his hold on your neck, forcing your head back to look up at him. Your body was now bowed in an almost perfect 'C' shape. You felt his other hand snake around your abdomen and press on the bulge that was his cock poking through your stomach. Again he throbbed in excitement.

"You were talking such a big game earlier baby girl, what happened? Surely you could all of a dick that's as little as mine. Right?" Taehyung scolded in your ear.

Little by little, he began pulling you more on his cock by your neck. And fuck he really wasn't lying he really had more length to feed your cunt.

"Ta-ae, pleaseplease n-o more-e, I can't take it m-my stomach hurts." You whined

"Hmm? But you're so close to taking all of me in. Just a few more inches, and I'll be all in." He responded.

Not wasting any more time he released your neck, and before you could fall down to the bed. He locked his fingers in your hair and firmly yanked, lifting you off the mattress, and into his arms, allowing himself the rest of the way in.

You screamed out as his hips met your ass with a wet smack. The increase in pressure coupled with the new position broke the levee to your release. You trembled uncontrollably as your orgasm started from your toes. Quickly spreading to your arms and head before finally spreading throughout your whole body, you were rendered speechless as your orgasm claimed you. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, as a burst of white light flashed behind your eyes, incoherent sounds of what was supposed to be Taehyung's name filled the space around you.

Through it all Taehyung continued to fuck into you almost violently, allowing your cores convulsions to wash over him. His body dripped with sweat as he briefly picked up his speed, his hips beginning to stutter. He held your thrashing body close to his as delivered his last couple of thrusts before moaning loudly and exploding his hot seed inside of your wrecked cunt.

You both fell breathlessly on the mattress, sweat polishing your skin, exhaustion quickly making its way to claim you. Taehyung pulled slowly out of your battered and swollen pussy. On wobbly legs, walked to the restroom to get a washcloth to clean the mess that was between your thighs. You moaned at the textured touch of the cloth and the dampness of it soothing the hot burn from your pussy.

Your whole body was numb, and you were utterly worn out, so much so, that when Taehyung pulled you into his arms, you didn't even argue.

In the morning you will definitely be having a word with him. But for now, you let his racing heartbeat lull you to some much-needed sleep.

#bts smut #taehyung x reader #taehyung smut #bts v smut #bts taehyung x reader #bts taehyung smut #bts #bts fanfction #bts fanfic #smut #college au #bts e2l #bts oneshot #bts taehyung

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memes-saved-me · 3 years ago

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Thank you for tagging me in this brilliant idea!!! @lovebillyhargrove 💖💖💖💖💖

Answers below😁

1. Do they get together BEFORE MF possessing Billy or AFTER shit goes down? (Or maybe DURING😲)

I'm a sucker for their tension boiling over some time around Christmas and that's when they either kiss, have sex, get together or all three lol. That or post Starcourt Steve is left to take care of Billy because no one else is around who can and he slowly falls for him while Billy falls for Steve all over again.

2. Who kisses who first?

Steve. Steve going on for the kiss is my favourite. Billy of course returns it and is the one to take it further but Steve is the one to lean in or push Billy against a wall and go for it. Billy hesitates because he likes to tease and because he isn't fully sure Steve is on the same page.

3. Where do they have their first sex? (Location) (HJs and BJs count)

Blowjobs and handjobs at school. Hidden away or a party where they're drunk and it's messy but amazing. Sex wise Steve's room. Either its romantic and its been building to this or they rush to his, up the stairs and one is pushed down on the bed and so on. Its either intense and tension breaking or slow and caring. Or both honesty but its at Steve's house.

4. Who says 💖 I LOVE YOU 💖 first?

Billy. Steve thinks, knows he does way before but is scared to say it first so he waits and then once Billy says it, probably before, during or after sex he says it every chance he gets. Billy is a little less generous with it but when he says it Steve finds it means more than saying it all the time.

5. Bottom!Steve or Bottom!Billy?

I personally believe they'd switch. Hormone filled teenage boys happy to get what they can and deal it just as much. However, I'm a sucker for bottom Billy to begin with, Steve just getting into being bisexual so at first experienced Billy takes that position until Steve is comfortable enough to go for it. After that its whoever wants to or both of them. They just love being either side of things.

6. Do they give gifts to each other?

Steve will buy Billy things he wants or needs at any opportunity but Billy will buy little things here and there that have significant sentimental origin. Or he makes things like daisy chains and puts them on Steve while they sit in the grass. Little things like that.

7. Where do they end up living?

I love the idea of them leaving Hawkins, going to California and it just not being as good as Billy remembered. He bigged it up in his memories and they can't really afford the kind of place they would like there so they leave and go somewhere else to build a life together instead of relying on their past to bring them comfort. I'm not sure where they would end up really, maybe even another country eventually.

8. What are their future jobs?

Steve in sales, office work sort of thing. Billy a mechanic or dog trainer.

9. Who's a better cook?

Steve likes to think he's a better cook but Billy for sure is.

10. Steve Hargrove or Billy Harrington?

In terms of 😏 Steve but on terms of "Oh shit he's my favourite" Billy

11. What's Max's reaction when she hears they're together?

She's honestly disgusted by Steve's lack of taste and standards but is glad to know why Billy had been acting happier recently. Her first theory was drugs so being gay with Steve was more than better.

12. Describe in ONE SENTENCE Hopper's reaction when he hears the names Hargrove and Harrington mentioned together?

His ears perked up at the mention their names while sitting at the table with El, her run down of the day stating they were a couple which definitely caught his attention because never did he think the resident bad boy Billy would end up with preppy boy Steve but hey, teenagers are teenagers.

13. Does Robin like Billy OR does Robin hate Billy?

Robin loves anyone who helps her tease Steve but she also gives him the shovel talk which isn't as affective considering he was practically dead at one point. They have similar music taste and Billy is always brushing girls off and sending them in her direction which is an added bonus so yes Robin loves Billy as a friend but hates him as Steve's boyfriend because that's the best friend rule, you don't like their bf especially when they complain about them one minute then gush over him the next.

14. What about Dustin?

Dustin is just confused, for a long time. He doesn't really get why Steve would do this. Waste his time on Billy and he constantly asks him why but then he sees them together and sees Steve smile like he does when he's genuinely happy and he lets it go. Whatever makes Steve happy is okay with him. But he also gives Billy a talking to regarding hurting Steve or dumping him.

15. Fav Harringrove AU?

That's a real tough one. I'd have to say maybe the catching fire one I did because it lives in my head rent free and I mean in luxury with no bills rent free. It fits too well not to lmao.

Maybe the one where Steve accidentally kills Neil and they run off, idk there's just something about that.

16. Billy+Camaro=

Others have said it but I see the Camaro as a reflection of Billy and his current state. Like in S2 its all loud and fast and dangerous but then at the end once Max has threatened Billy she takes control of it just like she did Billy. In s3 its in a state of disrepair while he is flayed and catches fire as his fate is sealed and he dies just like the car. Also these shots right here are just 😭

I'd ramble for hours but I don't have time🥲 but thank you!! I just love talking about these boys!!!! Also everyone seems to have been tagged but I'm not sure so I'll leave this open for anyone!!💖💖💖

#thank you!!!!#harringrove

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peanut-butter-parkerxx · 3 years ago

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non-navigational maps

y/n's new to the giant busy crowds of new york so she wanted to ask someone for help

pairing: peter x fem!reader

status: strangerz

Warning: shy reader (idk if this is a warning but just in case)

y/n's POV

new york sure is loud, like really really loud. but thankfully i found a park or something so i can relax a bit and really look at my map. i couldnt understand a thing. seriously how do people use a thousand subways just to get to one place?

after a few minutes i gave up and tried to ask someone for help which isn't very fun for me considering i barely talk to strangers...too shy for all of that but my familly will murder me if i wasnt home by 6 and most importantly im STARVING. hmm lets see, a mom and her toddler? nah shes probably busy as it is trying to stop her little boys tantrum, the old man in the bench infront of me? yeah why not- nope his ice cream just spilled on his shirt poor thing. i wanted to help him out but someone already did, a boy i think wait no he looks older maybe my age? i dont know, i can only see his back, his hair looked cute though soft, brown, light, did I mention soft?- ok y/n stop it.

"Damn it!" The old man cursed "should've gon for the vanilla" he shook his head, I laughed his comment, he 'should've' gotten vanilla coz his t-shirt was white and it wouldn't stain that much *laughing* ugh so wholesome

I heard another voice, a much younger voice. I looked up from my god damn map to meet the back of the boy who's helping the guy out, laughing at what he said. His laugh is cute too

"But chocolate tastes better sir, I think you made a great choice" he wiped the excess now I know chocolate ice cream off the old mans shirt

"I always make the right choices kid, the names Stan" the once grumbled old man, smiled just from an act of kindness by a boy my age, he held his hand for him to shake

"Peter, Peter Parker sir" he shook his hand and smiled he said something to Stan which made him laugh. I giggled from their interaction just happy from what I've witnessed. for some reason I find guys my age helping others attractive it really shows me how good of a person this guy is, it makes me feel like not all boys my age are bad, I don't know hopefully I'll see him soon

*A/N: YES IM PUTTING A STAN LEE CAMEO IN HERE, if you didn't ask...The old guy I'm talking abt is Stan lee ;)*

After looking at my map a billion more times to try and not talk to people I gave up again and kept looking around, since there wasn't anyone else in this side of the park I decided to walk, if I'm staying for a while might as well get some exercise am I right?

I walked for a few minutes until I found a group of benches again so I looked for someone unoccupied, not sketchy, and hopefully is in a good mood, till i found a beautiful woman probably in her 40s or something ( but she looked amazing though)

she seemed nice as well, she just had that vibe to her so i decided to ask her, yayy can you feel the sarcasm?? I'm TERRIFIED

she was sitting on the bench, lifting her glasses every once in a while to read the book she had in her hand. i slowly walked up to her, nervous. what should i tell her? that im new to the area and if i couldnt find a Mcdonalds soon ill turn into the next hulk? the nerves seemend to fade away once we we locked eyes, she had brown welcoming eyes, a smile ill probably never forget plastered on her face.

"hello sweetie, what can i do for you?" her voice was like honey sweet, and calming as well.

"oh uhm sorry to bother you but i- i am kinda lost and i-i cant find a burger place kind near the are-" i was a stuttering mess! But thankfully i got interrupted from humiliating myself...by the- who is this guy? Oh wait! That's the guy that helped the old man! Peter? Yeah Peter, Peter Parker

"sorry i took a while aunt may, theres this old guy named stan, he spilled his ice cream all over his shirt so i decided to help him and i bought him a new one! should we go..." the boy trailed off, he looked cute not gonna lie, he had the same features as the woman infront of me, brown eyes, soft brown hair, and a kind spirit definitely. "s-sorry was i interrupting something?" he rubbed the back of his neck embarrassed

"no its okay peter, this lovely lady right here is just lost would you be a doll and help her? im bad at maps as it is" she laughed pointing at me. the second he looked at me blood rushed to my cheeks, he really was cute. i gave him a small wave and a barely audible 'hi' but luckily he picked it up and replied with a 'hey'

"i-im"

"Peter, yeah I know. Kinda heard saw helping the guy out. That's really sweet of you...what you did" I blushed "a-a-anyways I'm y/n" I wiped my clammy hands on my jeans to take the sweat off quickly before he shook them.

"Uh nice to meet you too?" he fiddled with his hands his smile growing bigger with every second he looked at me "y-you needed help?" He asked blushing and also eyeing may like he's frustrated from her or something, I laughed at his face and opened the map in my hands

"Uhm, well i-I'm supposed to go to the 21st street 3rd Avenue or somethig by 6 coz my parents will kill me if I was late since were new here, but I think there's enough time to go find some burger place or something since I'm starving and there should be a Macdonalds around the corner right? Oh my god I'm so sorry I'm rambling...I do that a lot when I'm frustrated.....and hungry haha" I nervously laughed mentally kicking myself for being such an idiot to a boy I potentially liked

"Oh no no, I don't mind. So uh you live in queens?" He started off smiling a bit, I was scared for a second since i didn't tell him about that part how would he know that?

"Oh uhm, I'm from queens and the 21st street 3rd Avenue is in queens" he probably got nervous since he saw my slightly frightened face, but it softened once I knew that he wasn't a creepy stalker or some shit

"Y-yeah yeah queens, sorry" why the the fuck am I apologizing?

"No it's fine, you don't need to worry. You probably couldn't find the 21st because you held the map upside down?" he chuckled flipping the map and I just died in embarrassment like can the floor eat me or something?

"I'm such an idiot oh my god" I face palmed and laughed a little the world has something against me I am sure of it

"No you're not, you're new to the busy subways and noisy streets it's fine" he assured me and continued on chuckling, can this day get any worse? "well ironically there isn't a burger place near this area" well great "but t-theres this deli sandwich shop that I always g-go to, uhm I don't know if you'd like that but it's uh really good" he squeaked red swarming to his cheeks and the tip of his ears

"He can show you, if you want? Since you're new and everything he'll be happy to help" the woman buts in smirking, turns out she's been listening to our conversation than reading her book. She sent Peter a wink and packed her stuff

"But what about the library may, you said you wante-"

"It's ok Peter, just come home before 7 and be safe!" She patted his shoulder and gave me a smile. It all happened so fast but I smiled back. Guess I'm gonna go eat with a handsome stranger?

"Well uhm sorry about my aunt" he cleared his throat "wanna g-go grab a sandwich? It's like 10 minutes away and uh we have like" he checked his watch " 3 hours before it turns 6 so plenty of time..." he trailed off, I could either decline and not explore with a cute boy and get lost again? Or risk it and potentially get kidnapped....yeah the answer is pretty obvious

"..uhm yeah sure, let's go" I ushered him taking the map and stuffing it in my bag "well, after you"

I'm thinking of doing a part 2 idk 🤷🏻‍♀️

Have a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night!

-quacksonlover

#spiderman #peter parker x fem #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker #peter parker fluff #ned leeds #may parker #aunt may #the avengers #mcu #michelle jones #marvel #sony pictures #imagines #peter parker x reader #fluff #peter #parker #avengers

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retphienix · 4 years ago

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Alright, this is gonna be tough because I desperately want to say so much for the game's sake and my own, but it's just so much.

At least the playthrough as a whole exists to show a lot of those things, and there's no shame in some of the impacts the game had for myself going unsaid :)

LONG POST INCOMING, NO 'READ MORE' BECAUSE IT'S RELEVANT TO THE POST AND NOT AN AFTER-THOUGHT

CLICK 'J' ON YOUR KEYBOARD TO SKIP. (Sorry mobile users)

8:48 - Do you have any idea how good a step forward it felt to smash the repressing bulb?

9:50 - So I'll get ahead of myself because this fight shows a lot of the visuals that play into this: Something being the manifestation of guilt for Mari is so incredibly visualized.

Between the base 'Something' being extremely close to the shadow she cast and including the one visible eye that bore down on Sunny and Basil after the hanging, to the stairs incorporating into the design.

The seaweed and spider are more general anxieties though they do circle back to Mari since she saved Sunny, but those two forms don't feel as directly related as the stairs (heights) and base 'Something' forms and what they represent for his repressed guilt.

Could be wrong ;) Tell me what you saw in the forms of 'Something' if you'd like to expand on them :)

12:39 - Just to prove the point before you get to fully see the truth- Something morphs into the figure of Mari hanging. It doesn't fully demonstrate the "eye" aspect yet, but still I just wanted to say kudos on the way 'Something' is shown visually. Formless for a reason, and that form becomes more defined as you understand what it is, exceptional damn thing.

15:43 - Basil's part in all of this makes me so damn sad. Plenty to say later (obviously), but he harbors so much guilt, wants forgiveness so much, and is so (not shown yet) desperate to believe in Sunny's innocence while knowing but not comprehending the truth. The fact he harbors his own 'Something' due to the guilt of all this is heartbreaking, these kids endured a hell no one should. Losing someone so important to you and harboring the guilt and fault of it when nothing of the sort was intended. A childish fight with raised emotions got out of hand and all this came of it.

Hell.

16:30 - I absolutely adore how the photo album is used for this reveal.

Absolutely incredible execution that's specific to this story and its characters and makes piecing (literally) this together tense and grim.

22:27 - I NEVER SPOKE TO OR INTERACTED WITH THE THING IN THE CENTER OF THIS ROOM AND I'M A NORMAL AMOUNT OF UPSET ABOUT THAT >:( lol

29:41 - Okay.

So this reveal as a whole is so unbelievably well paced and incredibly hard hitting.

All game long there's a weight of having lost Mari. Repeatedly it's told that she killed herself and no one can understand why and everyone (MYSELF THE PLAYER INCLUDED) is looking for meaning in little moments, seeking out hints that maybe she was suffering or depressed or this or that.

And while that has gone on FOR THE ENTIRE GAME there has also been this uneasy weight surrounding Sunny/Omori. Visions of Mari twisted and deformed into phantoms of horror.

For the most part I assumed it was just him coping with having lost his sister and maybe a dialogue on how when she was alive he was in her shadow (in his mind) and now that she's gone he remains there?

That was the best I could figure, more or less. But it continued to seem more and more malicious in design and MUCH more 'heavy' in how it's presented as a shadow behind Omori/Sunny throughout his adventure and life.

The weight and 'overshadowed' looks of the scenes felt more and more foreboding and less like a simpler "I'm living in her shadow" story, but I couldn't figure out what it was.

Then these pictures come out and piece things together.

The final result:

Sunny and Mari fighting. (Context appears to be his growing disdain towards playing. It's stated he loved playing, but it's also shown that he begins to dislike how much Mari is dragged away for classes and the like up to and including playing. So my read was that Sunny was upset that their fleeting time together was dedicated to the recital and broke his violin in an emotional blur and the fight occurred.

Alternatively it was accidentally broken and both of their emotions were running high as it happened)

Mari falling to her death.

Sunny and Basil carrying her upstairs and tending to her.

Sunny breaking down as it sinks in.

The visions having Basil say "It's going to be okay" by the bedside. (I perceive that as a memory of what Basil was saying as he tried to manage his emotions during the event)

Sunny and Basil carrying her back downstairs and to the backyard.

The makeshift noose.

And finally the sight that burned itself into Sunny's eyes of her hanging after it was all said and done.

Just holy shit to it all in how it's revealed and handled.

Stories have twists all the time, and I ain't gonna make some bold claim like "Most unpredictable!" "Best twist!" "What a twist!" or whatever, though that'd be funny.

I just want to say this twist worked BEFORE the reveal as a foreboding sense of unease and curiosity- it lent itself to intentionally vague and easily misconstrued explanations, basically- instead of it outright misleading you beyond the characters that believe the lie repeating the lie, it allowed you to mislead yourself.

It did the twist the right way! And well! YOU trick YOURSELF! The people repeating the lie are being lied to or have motivation to repeat the lie! The GAME isn't lying (as so many twists handle it) the game is giving the world reason to mislead and allowing you to be mislead!

Now am I yelling affirmations for the way things SHOULD ALWAYS BE! YES! BUT THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S NOT AS NORMAL AS IT SHOULD BE! lol

31:40 - All the "You will really miss them"s hurt :(

33:25 - Right out the gate, a spoiler for what isn't here:

I looked up the alternate endings of the neutral route and my heart hurts to know Sunny doesn't stick around and Basil dies :(

34:00 - BASIL BEING OVERWHELMED WITH DENIAL AND GUILT AS HE ATTEMPTS TO MENTALLY PROTECT HIS VIEW OF WHO HIS FRIEND IS BY INVENTING A SECOND PARTY THAT DID THIS IS SO FUCKING REAL AND AMAZINGLY DONE.

And it explains the name behind the 'Something'.

'Something' behind you did it. There's 'Something' behind you, isn't there.

'Something' all around us, that potentially being the truth comin' in.

When 'Something' ruined my photos, Basil repressing protecting Sunny by destroying the proof.

Just expertly done.

'Something' being repression of the memory and impending guilt. Dannnng.

36:26 - It's 24 hours after I beat the game as I type all this so here's a gag.

Here's the part where Basil beats some sense into his friend, because after this Sunny gets knocked out and wakes up 200% improved and ready to save Basil from his own guilt by releasing them both from the secret.

So basically Kel dragged us out of bed, then a couple days later Basil beats us up, and that's how Sunny gets better :^) Game Over.

38:46 - This fight made me feel utterly terrible, a highlight being the energy bar saying "Everything is going to be okay".

or at 40:17 - when Basil pokes out Sunny's eye and the screen does this? That's an underutilized but always awesome visual.

41:12 - I THOUGHT I WAS DEAD AT THIS POINT :)

Because just before entering Basil's home on this night you see his Grandma's ghost here. So seeing Sunny here told me "WELL. YOU FUCKED UP!"

42:25 - Like I said, beat some sense into Sunny.

Here's the mental side of things where Basil's beatin' told Sunny to go remember the good times and confront his inner self and I'm being partially facetious because there's plenty to say about what's coming up.

43:15 - Goosebumps every time due to the sincerity and hope of this.

43:40 - Hug for anyone needing that.

51:11 - I could cry again and I just might before this post is done being put together.

This accident was never meant to be.

55:09 - Timestamp is arbitrary, I won't go over every flashback but I do want to say what a beautiful way to use these photos. To relive the memories? To find the strength to overcome and all that? After all these years of suppressing memories? DANNNG I love this game.

1:04:09 - I stepped in poop.

1:04:15 - Barefooted.

1:04:22 - I embraced my failure.

1:12:00 - The violin.

1:13:00 - "The anxious feeling-" "They believed in you" "No matter what you didn't want to disappoint them" I'm filled with love and gonna cry about it.

1:14:00 - So an important theme in the game, as if it has just one, is Sunny suppressing emotions and demonizing himself.

Obviously the ending shows him breaking free from both but I think it's important as hell to look at how he builds up to being able to.

After all the dark moments show him as a bloodied monster, demonstrate a perceived lack of remorse for what he's done (as in he sees himself so poorly that he says "I must not have felt bad about it, I'm a monster", not that he actually doesn't feel bad about it, that he thinks he shouldn't because he's bad), have him stab dream Basil to protect his repression of the memory, the build up to breaking free from that is him remembering the good in him through the lens of his friends.

Both in the real world and in revisiting the memories within the photos.

He hears about the good in himself that he has pretended isn't there and finds the power to overcome this deadened shell he's made.

He learns how to forgive himself by finally remembering he's worthy of forgiveness and is more than his mistake, that even the person he grievously harmed would want him to forgive himself and would understand the mistake didn't define him.

1:15:15 - Just because you did something bad doesn't make you bad, to put it more eloquently than my rambles. He had to learn that.

1:19:20 - I've done this fight 4 times.

You may be wondering why 4 times, it ain't like I replayed the game a ton or anything.

The short of it is:

1) For the good ending :)

2) To see what happens if you go "up" in the hospital- it's a dead end- I assumed it'd be a bad ending. So I got the good ending again :)

3) For the bad ending.

4) FOR THE GOOD ENDING TO WIPE THE HORRIBLE FEELING IN THE PIT OF MY STOMACH AWAY FROM THE BAD ENDING :)

In doing so I did get one layer deeper on the BG of Omori in the fight, here it is:

And I learned on the fourth run that the fight is simpler than I gave it credit lol, Cherish refills your juice, so there is no reason to use Encore. You can get to the end (and deeper more easily) by just using the triple attack and Cherish and Calm down when necessary.

1:29:00 - A summary of the fight is that it's extremely impactful emotionally, but very obviously isn't a "Fun fight". It's great mechanically and story wise for what it's trying to do :)

I'll just say it here: I'm surprised there wasn't an end-game "Omori" fight, you know, in dream world? Because combat is SO good in this. I am lead to believe that the Omori route where you never go outside in the real world has more bosses and zones and would fill what I just implied I wanted- but you're also railroaded into the Neutral endings which are both sad :(

And honestly? That makes sense and I applaud the decision :) Embracing the fantasy world for more 'fights' isn't exactly the path to recovery. Also and I know someone will be bothered I say this because *I'm* bothered I'm saying this- it makes sense since a big predecessor did the same thing lol.

Undertale Genocide has new bosses and a harder end game challenge (Sans) while being the worse ending, while the good ending has a flashy and story/emotionally impactful final fight that isn't as challenging because challenge isn't the point of the morals being explored.

I just bring it up because it's interesting, has a parallel, and after fighting Omori 4 times I really REALLY wanted to do an end-game fight in Dream World.

1:30:00 - forgive me as I cry again. goosebumps and more.

OH NO~!

DRAT!

So I use a cheap video editor and I use the free format of it which limits to 720p and I didn't think twice of it.

I recorded at max, but downgraded after editing.

At 720p you can't see the detail that made me break down crying!

At 1:31:55 Sunny's eyes go wider as he sees Mari as they finally get to experience the duet in this dream state (White Egret Orchid, this is real and happening, I'm taking this to my grave :'( ) he sees her smile and that smile made me break down, but in the 720 it's blurry :(

That's on me, I could have posted the scene raw in HQ but I didn't know it'd compress just enough to be invisible :(

still. that duet scene can make me cry on command. just because of that alone, but also the entire thing.

1:33:42 - Sunny breaks from his shell and feels his emotions again.

1:37:07 - I wish every game would end with a mirror to see yourself.

The 'Despite everything, it's still you' vibe just cements all the growth and experiences that have happened as so much more real when that happens. Bonus points because mirrors in Omori are a time bomb where you can be reminded of the guilt following you- and this one is safe. This one is pure and clean. You did it.

1:37:50 - As I said earlier, going up does nothing. Dead end.

1:39:00 - I have to tell you something.

Simple ending. And yet slams me like two trucks. I'm so proud.

1:41:00 - Post credits scene.

This is so heartwarming and their smiles are the purest thing in the entire world.

1:42:50 - BAD ENDING RECORDING.

All I'll say on that is the bad ending made me feel terrible inside. Give up, live in your bubble, and subconsciously end it all so you never have to confront reality again.

My gut felt heavy to be honest.

And the fact that THAT is when Bo En Time is played is INCREDIBLE.

Having the sky shift like that gave goosebumps and cemented my dread.

Just seeing it now has me feeling very poorly.

Okay. Video done.

Now for general thoughts.

First off this White Space cycle has been going on for YEARS with Sunny only getting worse as he suppresses things more and more and the reason he found the strength to overcome is because of his friends and I'm gonna yell about it.

THE REASON SUNNY IS BREAKING FREE CAN BE DIRECTLY POINTED AT KEL THINKING "FUCK IT, I'M ABOUT TO LOSE A FRIEND, AND I DON'T WANT TO"

And I just think that is sweet as hell. The strength was inside himself, but the problem itself caused Sunny to demonize and not trust himself- he needed someone to break him free and help convince him that he's not irredeemable. And boom.

The way this game handles Denial and even gives it physical form with the 'Something's that both Sunny and Basil harbor is just awesome.

I touched on it but combat in Omori is very, very good.

I've said it here and there as I played and I feel like going at length in the finale post is pointless because this isn't a review but to put it concisely.

Types changing mid-combat, the character archetypes being so well defined, the follow up system, combat in Omori is some top notch turn based RPG stuff.

Like up there with the greats, the timeless masterpieces. This is GOOD fighting. So it was surprising the good ending didn't emphasize it- I explained why that makes sense, but even still! It'd probably be lesser for it (as explained previously) but it's interesting they practiced that restraint for the message they wanted to send.

Repeatin' that Mari's smile in the recital made me cry. Burned in my brain.

I'm still surprised I got the post credits scene because I DID water the plants a lot but when the game showed me them all dead I assumed that was the fail condition.

I genuinely do want to try the Omori route some time down the road. I hope I get around to it.

I am slightly dissuaded just because the Omori route only gets the neutral endings which are not Good To Be Blunt :(

But I want to see what dream content there is and I hear there are other bosses!

Other small bits from my notes:

Replacing denial (the black bulb) with hope (the white bulb) was good as heck.

The imagery of the 'Something' is so top notch- using the shadow of her body combined with the piercing gaze of her single eye- MY GOD.

The fragility of life being so present- between memories of near death experiences, to the way in which Mari dies, to the ease at which either Basil or Sunny can end the game. It's tense and heart-wrenching.

The way the 'Something' behind Sunny almost always shadows over him like an ever present weight.

Tearful, hopeful, pure, kids enduring a guilt metric tons heavier than their bodies could ever handle and finally, finally moving beyond it.

I said more in a personal post, and I'll reblog that.

Honestly, just timestamping through the video took it out of me and got the point across.

Omori is a wonderful game.

It's definitely a favorite for me, high up there on my list.

Between the themes, the gameplay, the humor, the ending.

This is a good one.

And now I get to end having experienced all the care and love in this title, that's such a sweet thing.

Now I know this finale post is a mess, illegible even. I have gotten sloppier as I've begun embracing just 'experiencing and rambling' and perhaps my formatting with change yet again until I find something more easily shared.

Despite that. I want to thank any who popped in on this playthrough.

This was a good one, a highlight of the blog for sure- and I'm always happy when I see some people enjoying the absolute mess I toss online when I do one of these :P

So thank you for your time, and thank you to any ridiculous enough to read my nonsense here.

Have a good one :)

And just as expected I feel I've said nothing and barely touched the surface as the post-game-head of mine does a poor job lol. Even still :P

#RetPlays #Omori #Spoilers

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samtheflamingomain · 3 years ago

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25.21%

I've been sober for 3 months today. 92 days. 25.21% of 2021.

I could've posted more updates, more milestones (it took a LOT not to post on Day 69) but I wanted to kind of save it up for a Big Day. It was also a decent way to continue to incentivize my continued sobriety: a full pass to do a shameless, hardcore bragging sesh.

Anyway, this post comes in 2 parts: the TL;DR for those who only want the gist, then more in depth on my ability to stay sober, the lasting effects of rehab, etc.

I tried my damnedest to pare this absolute novel down, but it's long, so feel free to dip out if you just get bored. Onward!

TL;DR: I went to rehab the beginning of July for 3 weeks and haven't had a drop of alcohol since. I've lost weight, I'm more healthy, my daily anxiety level went from 8 to 2, I haven't had an anxiety attack in 3 months, and everything generally just seems... easier. My memory and concentration have improved. I've been productive and I've been meditating every day. I'm saving money, and while I sometimes fantasize about getting drunk, that's usually all it is.

Honestly, it's been much easier than I expected, but I think a lot of that is because for the first 3 weeks, the time in which I would usually break down and start drinking again when trying to get sober myself, was spent behind a locked door. So far I haven't had any days where I was close to giving in. I haven't had many days where I've been depressed about it, missing it or really tempted. Maybe 3-4. I've basically just gotten on with my life as if alcohol doesn't exist.

To wrap up the short version for those ready to peace out, I'll leave it with a bit of advice.

I don't feel qualified to give any specific advice, because my story feels very unique to me, and I honestly don't think what worked for me will work for MOST people. Sometimes people spend a year in rehab and still drive straight to the liquor store on their way home.

That said, there's one thing that I've found pretty universally true: you have to really want it. For a while, I floated about without much of a "reason" to stay sober. I don't have a spouse, kids or a job I've been fired from, so I didn't see the point.

It's taken me a while, but after not being "convinced" by a few superficial "reasons" like weight loss and saving money, I thought I needed something more... permanent? Consequential? I now realize that my "reason" for getting sober at a young age after only a few years of alcoholism is that I don't want it to get to a point where I'm hurting other people, drinking myself into multiple lasting health problems... I don't want it to become permanent or consequential.

Anyway, that's my two cents. If you do have something like kids or trouble keeping a job, definitely use that as your reason. But for anyone who's a pretty "functional" alcoholic like I was, "not letting it go on long enough to become disfunctional" is a good enough reason.

This is going to get stupid long, so feel free to walk away now, just glad you read this much and it really does mean the world when people listen to what I have to say.

Now some more things in depth. I'll go in chronological order: what made me get sober, what I took from rehab (and what I left), and how it's been the past few months.

I started drinking when I got kicked out, manic out of my mind and homeless unable to sleep. It took a while until I was able to sleep without alcohol, but by then the addict brain had taken over. I'd tried a few times to get sober myself, but I never made it more than a week without, and always got back to daily drinking after a few months maximum.

Some people need a "wake up call", a "last straw" or a "rock bottom". Something external to make them realize they can't go on as they are. For me, the catalyst was my health, which is more of an internal reason I suppose. I didn't have a heart attack or liver failure, but my anxiety was getting uncontrollable and I knew it was directly tied to my drinking.

My life had been starting to feel tolerable, and I was more financially secure than ever before. Things were looking up... except for the alcoholism. This is a weird analogy but the only one that makes sense to express why, if I was doing so well on paper, I decided to go to rehab: you have to sweep before you mop. If I hadn't been in the place I was, I don't think I would've been successful at rehab. I had to sweep up the cat turds from the floor of my life before I was able to mop up the shit stains with sobriety. I know, I'm a true wordsmith.

When I finally called the hotline that hooked me up with a bunch of different rehabs, I knew I was in for a wait. It was about 5 months from that call to checking in, which isn't too bad considering I've been on the waitlist for a neuropsychiatrist in ALL OF CANADA for 4 years.

That brings us to July 12th, Rehab Day One. I've gone in depth in multiple other posts but to touch on it briefly, if I had to describe my experience in a sentence I'd say "the place I went to got very lucky with me".

What this means is that, of the 5 people in my group, I think this exact program was only ever going to help me. At the same time, I didn't even know what I would need, but this exact program was 90% of it. I didn't think 3 weeks would be long enough, but for me it was. The hours-long, repetitive, basic-ass CBT groups held 5 times a day 7 days a week was absolute torture for everyone but myself. While it was a drag to spend an hour on defining what a cognitive distortion is, the routine and repetition, something I've never gotten out of any outpatient program, helped me to really absorb the information and let it rewire my brain.

I've always said that I'm someone who should be spending an hour a day with a therapist for the rest of my life, and while that's not even remotely feasible, this was as close as it's ever gotten, and it proved me right, because it worked. I've done biweekly therapy for a short time but even that didn't come close to the way my brain changed in those 3 short weeks.

This program required absolute commitment and open-mindedness. This isn't because it was hard work or difficult concepts, but quite the opposite. While I hate the entire concept of art therapy being used as a cure-all for mental illness, I willingly got out of my bed, went downstairs and tried doing a dot mandala for an hour because I'm willing to try anything to get better. A lot of people might think they are, but really aren't. To use the mandala as an example, one guy was really into it, I wasn't, but we both finished. The other 3 tried, messed up a few times, and then scrolled through their phones. When I say this program necessitates complete engagement, that's not a compliment. It shouldn't be a chore to engage with the program. It shouldn't take me actively saying "I know I've known this basic concept since 4th grade, but maybe hearing it again will help" to get something out of a rehab program. So again, in every way, I got lucky, and so did they.

Before I finish with the rehab section, having had a few months to reflect on the whole thing, I now have an endless list of things wrong with it. I arrived, greeted by the most jaded and disillusioned of staff, and quickly became disturbed and at points concerned with just how negligent the staff are.

Maybe it's because I've been on the psych ward where they won't even let you have shoelaces and shine a flashlight on your face every half hour through the night, but it could've been so incredibly easy to sneak in alcohol. I brought 2 full water bottles, fully expecting to have to dump them out upon arrival, but they said "nah it's fine". Is it though?

Then there were actual counsellors there who were... okay. I recall one, the one I thought was the smartest, reading a handout aloud and coming across the word "delve" as in "let's delve into..." and stumbled, then said she doesn't know that word. The room was silent. As she pulled up Google on the screen I said, "it means to dive into it". She Googled it anyway. Synonyms include "dive in". If that was the only example I wouldn't mention it, but this was the first of at least 10 words she had do Google, none past a 10th grade level, from HER OWN MATERIAL. From that point on it became clear that they had no fucking idea what they were doing.

We had one last one-on-one counselling session before we left and the counsellor just filled in boxes to questions on her computer, rephrasing everything I said to fit into the buzzwords and "lessons" we'd "learned". Example. Me: I do think I'm better able to catch myself thinking 'oh I can just have one drink' and say 'no I can't'." Her: "Okay, so would you say that you can recognize negative cognitive distortions like permission-giving thoughts and counter them with a more rational and less emotional mind?" Like girl, blink twice if your boss is holding your family hostage. She gave me some papers, detailing all the online courses they were signing me up for and options for more treatment they'd be sending me, a phone number to call and a phone appointment for the next Monday. I never got that call, the phone number is a hotline, I never got a single email from them, and given how shitty they really are at their jobs, I didn't feel the inclination to try and get those resources. If they even exist in the first place.

In summation, it was a place where it was physically impossible to get alcohol. That's really all I can say in its favor. Oh, and they let you have your cell phone.

Now on our timeline I'm back home. I want to kind of analyze why it's been easy for me.

I often said that my main goal of going to rehab was to lock me away from alcohol long enough for it to reset my brain. Most people thought that was naïve, but that's exactly what happened. But I'm well aware that my experience of "instantly became sober and literally hasn't had a single hard day in 3 months" is absurdly unusual.

I put this down to a few things. Firstly, I'm on seven different meds for my mental health. Almost all of them have their effects dulled or even eliminated when you drink. So when I noticed my mood, fatigue, memory, concentration etc all getting better at once - right about as I left rehab, I don't think it would be a stretch to say that all those meds started working properly.

Secondly, I've been keeping myself busy, but that's something I've always been good at. Now I specifically choose to undertake projects that will eat up a lot my time and put me in a state of flow. I recently made an entire card game from scratch, and let me tell you, I didn't think of alcohol for a week.

Thirdly, my other goals now get in the way of alcohol. I'm getting old and my body is deteriorating. But I've always wanted to do just one last season of gymnastics. Well, I need to lose weight for that to happen. I've already lost 35 pounds, and after another 20 I'll be ready to go. Also, I used to spend more on alcohol per month than rent. Even though I've done a few shopping sprees lately, I haven't come remotely close to how much I was spending before.

I want it more than anything. I want to be sober more than I want one night of "fun" that will more likely than not lead me back to where I was a year ago. I never want to need anything as much as I needed alcohol.

Lastly, just a few more random thoughts.

A lot of people, myself included, worried about the fact that I work at a bar as a cook, but honestly the entire time I'm there I'm thinking about food, not alcohol. If I'm hanging out with some regulars before/after, I can watch them drink and be perfectly fine with my coffee, because the coffee is $2, and I used to spend $20 after every work shift.

I also decided in rehab to start taking better care of myself as best I could. This started with getting my second vax which I'd been putting off, then an eye appointment, then new glasses, then a dentist appointment where I was informed I need to do $3000 worth of work on my implant that's erroding my bone matter, so that sucks, but I caught it early. I've also been meditating every day. In just 3 months, I've made pretty big improvements to my self-care and my daily routine.

One of my fears about sobriety was "missing out" on "having fun". A few days ago, all my housemates got together to play Mario Party, and it was kind of my first night doing something social while sober. It was a breath of fresh air - I wasn't constantly running to piss, I didn't worry about running out of alcohol, I didn't get sloppy and obnoxious as I can sometimes do. I even came very very close to winning my first game of MP. When I reflected on the night, I realized that, if I'd been getting drunk the whole time, I would've sucked at the minigames, been a hindrance to anyone unfortunate enough to be teamed with me, and likely would've stopped caring about the game itself after the first few turns.

Yesterday I was making my 4th pot of coffee of the day when I realized there was a full glass of wine just sitting on the counter. I had absolutely no idea where the hell it came from - nobody in my house drinks wine. I shrugged and poured that sweet sweet bean juice. It was only when I sat down and took a sip of coffee did I find myself thinking automatically, "this tastes so much better than wine". I only realized then that it had been rose wine, the only kind I've ever been able to tolerate. It was the ultimate moment of possible temptation, and the thought of just chugging that glass - as I may've done in the past - didn't even cross my mind.

I'm so glad to be where I am. I'm about to undergo some serious financial changes - i.e. going absolutely broke - but drinking isn't gonna help that, so I'm cautiously optimistic.

Stay Greater, Flamingos.

#rehab #alcoholism #alcohol tw #sam #recovery #sobriety

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wintrgarden · 5 years ago

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a latte for your thoughts?

// a fan fiction dedicated to the winter garden couple of hospital playlist //

-----

"Ikjun, do you have my warm cup of hot latte?" Jeong won said, while walking towards him in the hospital's open space to take a break during his night shift.

"Here. Isn't it tiring in the PICU these days?" Ikjun replied with worried eyes.

"A little. I don't mind it though.

Yah, do you remember my liver transplant patient, Mina?"

"Yeah, the one where we had to cut the donor's liver to a quarter because it won't fit the tiny baby's body. What about her?"

"I went to her a while ago. She woke up, and winked at me like this!" Jeongwon lit up whenever he talks about his patients' recovery. His eyes sparkled and his smile widened. He repeated the wink so much that it could have been mistaken for a blink. In fact, he was so giddy that he didn't notice someone approaching.

"Professor Ikjun? The test results of patient Jiwon are out. Could you take a look at it?"

Jang Gyeoul, the third year resident of General Surgery has been standing there for a few moments, waiting for the two professors to actually notice.

While hiding his laugh, Ikjun followed suit. Jeongwon was left on the bench with an unwavering smile on his face.

Looking at him, one would think that his drink was too sweet to make him smile like that. Eavesdropping on their conversation would transform him into a humanitarian. But to delve into his thoughts --- now that, that's a different story.

It's nice to actually see an angel, once in a while. Just enough to keep me on my feet. I might be even enthralled by its eyes that don't wink but are enveloped with fascinating halo-like things. Even if this angel doesn't have wings, it has the most power to chase evil away. I wasn't sure if this angel could save me --- until it actually did.

------

"Yah, Ahn Jeongwon, are you sleeping here again?" Junwan said, while entering their shared office.

"O~ I just finished my night shift. I just lied down."

"Have you eaten?"

"I'll eat later."

"I also haven't eaten yet. Let's eat breakfast."

"Will you stop bugging me if I eat?" Junwan then pulled Jeongwon out of the cot, and dragged him to the packed cafeteria to fall in line.

------

"One iced latte, please. Oh, and a sandwich."

With the same baggy eyes and pale skin, Gyeoul was ordering her morning coffee. Just enough to keep her awake until she gets home.

"Annyeonghaseyo~" She greeted the two professors.

"De~" Jeongwon said, while Junwan nodded in response.

CODE BLUE --- CS. 3RD FLOOR. CODE BLUE --- CS. 3RD FLOOR.

Without a beat, Junwan, a Cardiothoracic Surgery Professor, left hurriedly. Jeongwon was then left alone. Gyeoul took her order and searched for a seat.

"One warm cup of hot latte and a pancake, please."

After getting his order, Jeongwon followed through and tried to find his way in the crowd. It was full of doctors and nurses waiting to start their morning shifts, so the noise was understandable.

"Professor! Here!" Gyeoul pointed to a newly vacant seat in front of her. The morning rush got the best of them that Jeongwon didn't think twice and made his way.

The crowd was boisterous. Jeongwon and Gyeoul's silence was awkward. It was not the kind of environment you'd want after a 12-hour shift.

But it was all worth it. At least for one of them.

"How was the Emergency Room last night?" Jeongwon blurted after taking a bite of his pancake.

"It's okay. There were a lot of unpredictable cases, most of which were tiring, as usual." Gyeoul's detailed answer was so calm. It seemed that the Professor's unexpected friendliness didn't bother her.

"Do you have someone to take you home?"

"What? No. I can go by myself." With a polite tone, Gyeoul showed her surprise with the question.

"I'll give you a ride home."

"No, you don't need to---"

"I insist. I still haven't bought you the meal you asked from me, anyway. Can a ride home suffice?"

Gyeoul was bewildered. But with the professor's kind nature, it seemed like something he would do for literally anyone. He wasn't called the "Buddha" for nothing, anyway.

-----

"It's that apartment on the right, Professor."

"This one?"

"Yes. Thank you for the ride."

"It's not a problem. The next time we catch ourselves on a rough patch, I can take you home again."

Gyeoul smiled. Her first that day. Then, she opened the door to get out.

"Oh, shit! I forgot!" The car stopped. Jeongwon's shock even surprised Gyeoul.

"Why, Professor? What happened?"

"I totally forgot about it. I was scheduled to get my car battery change the other week, then I forgot and was planning to do it today."

Sleeping in the cot that morning wasn't just to save time to rest up. He actually had long, overdue chores and was saving some energy to do them.

"Do you have a contact to a car battery seller?" Gyeoul asked.

"Yeah, I'll contact them now."

It was still early in the morning, around 6 o'clock. The service opened at 9 o'clock, so delivery wasn't possible after an hour or so.

Gyeoul stayed with him until things got settled. It was getting chilly, and the overwhelming fatigue got the best out of Jeongwon.

"Professor, you could rest a little in my place... if you like. You can sleep while waiting."

Jeongwon hesitated a bit, but decided to give in.

------

"I'll just get an extra pillow and some blankets." said Gyeoul, while Jeongwon helped in fixing the convertible sofa bed in her living room.

Once fixed, he sat and removed his shoes.

"You live alone?" he asked Gyeoul once she got back.

"Yes, for a while now." she replied as she handed him the pillow.

"Ah, I see."

"I'll just be in my room. You can call me if you need anything."

"Thank you... Also, I'm sorry for being so troublesome." His shy look gave him away.

"It's nothing, don't worry." Gyeoul smiled, and went into her room.

Jeongwon lied down. He couldn't believe what was happening --- and how the situation could naturally give a wrong impression. If he told Ikjun about this, he would make fun of him and joke about how he got things to escalate so quickly. Junwan would tap him on the back and commend him for finally picking up some tricks of his. Songhwa would be very much amused, and would romanticize the whole situation. Meanwhile, Seokhyeong would remind him that he's an OB-GYN Professor, and that he delivers babies very well. He would be of service to Jeongwon if ever he needed one.

His thoughts started to tone down, and after no time, he was asleep.

-------

"Professor?"

......

"Professor? I fixed some lunch. Do you want to eat?" Gyeoul wore an apron over some loose shirt and pajamas now, and sun was already high up.

Jeongwon looked at his wrist watch.

2:24 PM.

He quickly sat up.

"I'm sorry, did the service arrive? I must have been in a deep sleep."

"Yes, they arrived a few hours ago. I tried to wake you, but you were soundly asleep."

"I'm really sorry. You had to pay them, didn't you? I'll just pay you back."

"The receipts are there, over the table."

Jeongwon went to get them, and was distracted with the smell of food coming from the kitchen.

"Professor, I fixed some lunch for us, if you want to eat..."

He felt ashamed to take another offer, but hearing his stomach grumble made him look the other way, again.

Gyeoul was already fixing the table for two, while Jeongwon sat quietly and contemplated how much trouble he caused her all in a single day.

"I'm really sorry... I meant to wake up, seriously. I was just really tired from last night."

"It's okay." Gyeoul said with a chuckle. "I'm not holding anything against you, Professor." she added as she handed out his chopsticks.

"Thank you for the meal." he then said.

Everything was new to Ahn Jeongwon. He didn't need to wipe the table, or arrange the food, or even wear an apron. He didn't even need to worry if he was going to get enough food, as everything was already at his disposal. This new scenario keeps him gushing.

Being alone with a girl, in her apartment, eating her cooked food, and feeling something that only grown-ups alone in an enclosed space would feel. It wasn't like this was the first time something like this is happening, he often said to himself. It somehow eased his discomfort.

All while knowing the truth that this is in fact the first time.

But it's not like Jeongwon didn't have the opportunity and ability to; he just chose not to. His faith led him to a different path, and he was decisive to go this way. For the longest time, this weighed more than any choice he had to make in his life. But this time, something, or perhaps someone, was gonna tip the scale.

-----

"Yah! Jang Gyeoul! What's this?" Chu Minha screamed as Gyeoul entered the GS Department, in time for another night shift.

Someone left iced latte for her. With a double bacon sandwich. And some patches to ease pain. It came with a written note, saying:

"To my Good Samaritan. Thank you~

---- Ahn Jeongwon"

The handwriting made Gyeoul smile.

"Why did Pediatric Surgeon Prof. Ahn Jeongwon gave you coffee? And why are you smiling?"

"Nothing. It's just to repay a good deed."

"That's the most vague yet unsuspicious answer I've ever heard! Good deeds really cannot be questioned at all. I wish someone would also give me coffee." Minha wouldn't stop, but Gyeoul wasn't listening either.

She focused on the note. And the coffee. And the sandwich.

While remembering the long day with Ahn Jeongwon.

#hospitalplaylist #wintergarden #fanfiction #ahnjeongwon #janggyeoul #shinhyunbin #yooyeonseok

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sleepysloth99 · 3 years ago

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Pt 1

Warning: This isn't as upbeat as most of my posts are. Drug use is mentioned, violence, (of course, it's a Walking Dead AU!) So yeah if that's upsetting please skip this :)

The Walking Dead x Pigpen Crossover (AU)

Written by sleepysloth99

Part 1, Boss?

Jinhyeok:

Jinhyeok was working the night shift at a pizza parlor the very first night the outbreak started. He figured he'd go to work for some money, that it wasn't that serious, that even if he did die it wouldn't necessarily matter since he didn't have anyone to miss him anyway. He was taking out the trash when he heard a subtle groan. He scanned the alleyway and saw a woman slumped, staring at a wall.

"Uh... ma'am? Place's closed. Please come back tomorrow. It's not safe to be out here so late anyway--"

He stared at her.

"Ma'am... you okay?"

She turned her head and only to his surprise she was paleish green. Eyes a milky white, flesh completely rotten. Jinhyeok froze in fear.

"Wha... what the hell?" He just barely got away when the adrenaline started pumping and he dashed his way back inside.

"Kim-- sir-- there..." he panted "there's a lady... she... she--"

His boss Kim spun in his chair groaning.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Jinhyeok screamed. Kim was a big guy... 500 lbs to be exact. So to be stuck in a narrow pizza parlor with a chubby undead guy and no weapon was a death trap.

Jinhyeok knew he had to take action. He looked around for anything close by and found a pipe sticking out of the wall. He gave it a firm tug, hands slipping from sweat as Kim slowly stumbled to him. He just barely got chomped when it broke off and he hit him on the head.

Stunned but adrenaline still pumping, Jinhyeok gave Kim a few hits, when he struck him hard on the head. The impact breaking his head open. Jinhyeok falls back scared out of his mind. Kim's brains spilled all on the tiles.

Jinhyeok knew he had to run. He grabbed his backpack, packed a few things including the pipe, and sped off on the delivery bike.

Part 2: A Memorable Night

Romi:

Saturday night, 11:45 p.m. Romi was in the bathroom at her friend's house applying eyeliner.

"Yo! Romi! You almost done in there?" Shouted Ha-rin.

"Yeah! Hold on!" Said Romi, popping her lips to press the lip tint in. Tonight was going to be the best night ever. The night before she leaves back to college. Before she had to study again. It was going to be memorable.

And it was... just not that way she was expecting.

"Ooh you look nice!" Said Ha-rin, oogling Romi's outfit. From the black tank top to the contrasted pleated skirt with fishnets and heels, Ha-rin loved it.

"Aw thanks! You too!" Replied Romi, oogling Ha-rin's short pastel strawberry dress and dangly earrings.

They rushed into the car and drove for a good 30 minutes, taking a few sips of vodka along the way. When they arrived they pulled up to a massive abandoned church with a graveyard and everything. People were dancing, taking shots, getting high, etcetera. Much to Romi and Ha-rin's amusement, some folks were dressed as monsters in bikinis.

Once they settled with their drinks, Ha-rin pulled Romi aside.

"Hey... so... I heard Byung-ho was gonna be here tonight and uh..."

"You want me to give you guys some privacy... right?" Asked Romi with a smirk.

Ha-rin nodded.

"Sure thing." Said Romi, and off she went.

For the next four hours she went around the lot. Dancing, drinking, smoked a bit, and talked to random strangers. She went to the bathroom to touch up some of her foundation and checked her phone.

"Huh... it's been hours now and Ha-rin hasn't even texted me."

She stands there in front of the mirror. Internally debating if she should shoot her a text or not. She went to put her phone back in her purse when suddenly a hunch made her pause abruptly.

She wasn't sure why but she had a feeling that Ha-rin was in trouble...

By now she had left the bathroom and is pushing random people through the crowd.

"HA-RIN.... HA-RIN!!!" Romi shouted out, but was overpowered by the loud speakers. Everyone was crowding her, pushing and pulling when she looked to her left and saw a group of people running and screaming.

"RUN!" Yelled a man from the crowd.

Romi looked around when she saw a rotting old woman bite the neck of a young man.

Romi was too shocked and horrified to even scream. All she thought was... *"Oh no... Ha-rin... she--"*

Her phone buzzed.

Romi checked her phone... it was Ha-rin.

"Romi you gotta come here"

"NOW"

She frantically typed.

"Where are you? What's going on?"

The god forsaken ellipsis chat bubble popped up for what felt like hours.

"I'm in the cellar. Some guy crawled through the window and bit Byung-ho."

"Romi he's not moving. I'm scared!"

"Are you safe?" Romi typed.

"Yeah considering. I'm hiding in the little closet under the stairs."

Romi: "Okay stay where you are. I'm on the way."

Ha-rin: "And Romi--"

A guy bumped into her, dropping her phone. Instantly the screen shattered into a million pieces.

"Hey watch where you're--"

Romi choked on her words. The guy that bumped into her was... dead.

She stumbled and fell from her heels.

*"Ah... ah... shit. What do I do?! I don't have anything on me to fight! All I have are these heels and-- wait!"

The walker fell on top of her and was only a few inches away from her face. In the midst of her panic she kicked her heel off and upwards. In her reach she pushed the walker away and pierced the stiletto through its eye. She pushed the corpse away, making a group of people trip. She took off her other stiletto and made a run for it. The cellar was down the hall to the left. Where some of those things were pouring out of.

"Looks like my only way to her is to fight them." Romi said, gritting her teeth at all the sprinkles of glass penetrating her feet.

One by one each walker slowly stumbled up to her, and each time she took her heels and hit them in the brain. Only a few times did they get stuck in the heads of them. But Romi managed, she pulled through, she made it to the cellar.

"HA-RIN! HA-RIN! I'M HERE! HA....rin...."

Romi mumbled the last bit. She was too late. Her stomach tightened and dropped at the sight of her best friend's organs being torn and feasted on bit by bit.

Romi couldn't even gag. She was just out of it completely... only snapping back when Ha-rin reached her hand out.

"Rom..."

"HA-RIN!"

"Don't...don't... come closer..."

"NO I'M NOT LEAVING YOU BEHIND! HA-RIN! HA-RIN!"

"I... love you... Rom-com*..."

(Rom-com was Romi's nickname. The only person that got to call her that was Ha-rin.)

Much to Romi's dismay she fled. Fighting her way out and stealing a pair of sneakers on her way out. Heels still in each hand for defense.

She walked for a few hours through the woods. Avoiding the walkers and made it to the road. Empty but a clear view.

There she saw bright headlights... the sound of a motorcycle echoed through the trees.

"Hey... HEY WAIT WAIT STOP PLEASE!"

The driver made a sharp turn, almost hitting Romi.

The driver took off their helmet. There a man with black hair and tired eyes stood.

"What are you doing out here? You do realize what's going on... right?" He asked.

Romi fell her knees.

"YOUGOTTAHELPMEPLEASETHEREWASA--AND AND MY FRIEND-- HA-RIN SHE-SHE--"

The man raised his hand.

"Hey calm down... and lower your voice. Don't want those things hearing us. Now... what happened?"

Romi took sharp pants.

"My friend... Ha-rin she... she... IT'S ALLMYFAULTISHOULDVENEVERLEFTHERSI•HA•IDE!" She bawled. Covering her face in shame and defeat.

The Man frowned.

"It's okay... you don't have to tell me. Get on."

She got on the bike and they sped off.

The Man's eyes filled with fear. "Shit... you hear that? They know where we are. You got a gun or something?"

"All I have are these heels but believe me they work..." Romi commented with a menacing tone.

"Great. Take them out. I'll keep driving." Said The Man

Each side came one or two walkers. Romi stabbed as many as she could, aiming for the eyes and the head. It was all going well when her stiletto got caught on a walker's head, making her lose one of her only weapons.

"How are we doing back there?" The Man yelled.

"Lost one heel." She answered.

The Man sighed.

"Okay... do you know how to drive?" He asked.

"Yeah, why?" She answered.

"Alright... take the wheel while I handle them." The Man commanded.

Romi was going to ask if he was sure but all she needed was one look in his cold, threatening eyes to know he was sure.

She quickly switched places with him. Now she was driving the bike, turning every now and then to avoid the potholes and whatnot. The Man pulled out a pipe and whacked each walker. Each hit a loud "B O N G" rung out. A split road leading up to a bridge was spotted by the two.

"Okay... we should go up there. Get higher ground." The Man suggested. Romi nodded in agreement.

"Once we're above we should scout for something. Whether it's a payphone, gas station, something that can help us find someone or supplies at least." Romi suggested.

"Right... yeah good idea!" The Man exclaimed. He looked at her with a cocky smirk.

"You know... we make a pretty good team. I'm Romi. What's your name?" She asks, making a turn.

"Nice to meet you Romi, I'm Jinhyeok."

•To be continued•

How was that guys? I was talking with a friend on Discord and suddenly thought of this. If you guys want I can post some more parts featuring Minu, Yumi, mom, dad, and maybe Taehui. This was my first time writing an apocalyptic setting and since my head has been nothing but Walking Dead Game brainrot, figured I oughta put it to good use. :)

#manhwa #webtoon #pigpen+webtoon #pigpen #the walking dead game #the walking dead au #alternate universe #fanfic #zombie apocolypse au #carnby+kim #jinhyeok song #night 1 #outbreak #apocalypse #apocalypticfiction #zombie #walkers #muertos #sorry if this sucks

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thecanadianowl · 4 years ago

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Justice league Snydercut review

Wow talk about a long movie. Remember Mass Effect's 3 shit endings that were later improved (sorta) with DLCs. Well that is kinda how this movie is.

Before we start this, I just wanna say that I was very impartial throughout the whole snydercut movement. I wasn't part of it but I do see the good that they did in regards to some of their charities and with how the fandom itself has been painted in a negative light. So its good that they got what they have been demanding for quite some time. Snyder as director for me, I really am not the biggest fan of. His movies have some great cinematic moments that look amazing but the context around it is what muddles it for me.

Is it better than Whedon's JL? YES. To start I'll look at some of the things that I do like.

I do like how it was split into parts. Gives it that miniseries/Comic book feel

Thank god they removed that stupid cringy flash landing on top of Diana's chest scene.

Darkseid looks good. I know some people have issues with it but I liked it. I mean looking at it first glance has me convinced its Darkseid. His voice isn't too bad either. Reminds me a bit of Injustice 2.

As much as I have issues with Darkseid being introduced so early I do like that he had a brief confrontation/glaredown with the League, foreshadowing a possible in person encounter and that the League needs to expand if they are going to fight against Darkseid.

Steppenwolf's design has greatly improved and looks better than before.

Loved the scenes between Alfred and Diana. Wish there was more of that.

I loved how the movie added Cyborg, Aquaman and Flash attempting to stop Superman from getting to Batman. I also liked how in this version, Batman pleading to Clark's humanity telling him that world needs him and he needs to snap out of it. Also bonus for taking out that scene of Batman on the ground groaning about how old he is getting.

Okay seeing Clark get the black suit and having the voiceovers of both his father's merge together works in terms of Clark's arc into becoming the person he was meant to be. Also like the use of Zimmerman's Ideal of Hope score wished they let it play out a little longer. Probably my favourite moment in the film is where Superman just takes Steppenwolf's Axe like its nothing and freezes it.

Now to go into some of the more critical stuff that bugged me when watching.

For a movie that is 4 hours long, pacing issues were bound to happen. I think the first example of this can be found in the opening with the Superman scream wave (which started to get a bit hilarious when his screams could be heard every now and then) hitting all three mother boxes. they are shown individually reacting to it and it takes time, where it could have just showed them together or an compilation of each of the motherboxes waking up. I know it Snyder's thing but tone down on the slow mo. Like some instances its fine (like with bullet time or Flash's scenes) but other instances I'm just like alright I get it.

The scene involving Cyborg transferring money into that single mother's bank account. Is he gonna do this for all the people suffering just like her? or just for that one person? I mean if you can hack into the world monetary system, you can solve a lot of financial issues affecting the majoirty and not just one person. Did I miss the scene but why did Cyborg go from helping one poor person, suggesting the potential good he can do to change the world for the better to "Fuck the world". Seems a bit inconsistent in character. Especially since he knows who Diana is (from what he says) and that Parademons are after the motherbox. Maybe her offering help, you should take it? idk Vic. Also the whole Auto defense system malfunction, would it not be better if this was established beforehand where we see Vic struggling to maintain his body's autonomy leading up to the Superman confrontation? Prior to that it seemed he had it under control and his biggest conflict throughout the movie seemed more to be with him coming to terms with his new body. With that being said, Cyborg's character here is much more interesting and better than it was originally. I can see why Ray Fisher is so pissed (well that and the abuse he faced). I am glad this was improved and gave the character a lot more to do.

The movie still has the same issue as before in regards to the whole motherbox plot and how convenient it was that all three are located on earth. You would think that with the involvement of Darkseid/Steppenwolf that separating them to distinct locations across space would make it more difficult to collect them. I mean we know that the Green Lanterns exist (we saw one get chomped), you'd think that they or the guardians would take one and secure it on Oa. The pushback to this would be "well there was only one green lantern and he died, so how could they retrieve the box?" which begs my question, why send only one? I mean it has been established that Darkseid is a known conqueror of worlds, you'd think the Guardians would be smart enough to send more than one Lantern to aid Earth in their fight. Did they not think it would be a good idea to have the corps be more involved/keep an eye on earth since it is the only planet that was able to repel Darkseid's forces?

Why is it that the best idea of security when it comes to humans is to bury it? Would it not be better in optics to look over it and know its location instead of dropping it somewhere on the off chance that someone might find it due to being curious or the land changing/altering making the box more easy to attain? A situation as dire/serious as this, you would think that the Amazons/Atlanteans would have been better prepped with armor/weapons for such an event. I mean you have the arrow of Artemis that shoots quite a distance to give Diana a message but not some kind of weapon that hurts/cripples Steppenwolf? Or better yet, how about the moment that the boxes started acting up after Superman's death, that Atlantis/Themiscarya would put aside any differences they had with one another and to the outside world to come together to secure the boxes? How could Darkseid forget the name of the only planet that was able to force him to retreat? nor does he know that it harbors the anti life?

Did this movie break Aquaman's continuity? because from the dialogue between Mera and Arthur, its implied that Atlanna abandoned/left Arthur at Tom's doorsteps whereas in the movie, we see Atlanna spend a couple of years with Tom and raising baby Arthur before she was forced to come back. You'd think Zack being a producer for the Aquaman movie would have edited that line or made it more clear. Well that or James Wan F'ed up when making the movie.

"I've never seen a being as strong as Steppenwolf" Did Diana just forget Ares aka the god of war who killed the Greek Pantheon/Old gods and orchestrated the first World War? Hell from the looks of the flashback it seemed Ares (I'm assuming its Ares, if its Hades, my bad) was getting some good hits in on Darkseid, who is superior to Steppenwolf. While we are on the topic of Diana, it's a bit odd that Snyder who was a producer on WW84 where one of the biggest focuses on the movie that Patty Jenkins talked about was how Diana doesn't solve her problems with violence (even though her primary weapons in this movie are a sword and shield but okay. Then again New 52 hasn't done a good job in disproving that), yet in this movie we see her using her gauntlet smash to fucking kill the one remaining terorrist. Like sure you can argue that they were terrorists and deserve to die, but given how easy and quick it was for her to take out the previous guys, why do something that runs the risks of destroying the very building that you are in (with hostages). I mean from the look of the blast and how much debris fell from the building outside, and it was a miracle no one (but the terrorist) got hurt/killed.

Why did Steppenwolf kidnap them in the first place? Just use that mind extracting device you used on the Atlantean soldier to see if they know. Seems like a waste of time to collect them in one location only to interrogate them later.

Okay, I'm sorry but even in this cut I still don't like Miller's Barry Allen. He isn't as bad as he was in the theatrical cut but man does it stick out. When he is helping to escort the kidnapped civilians out, why doesn't he just grab them and transfer them to a safe distance? He even makes a comment about how slow they are going. Can I also just say how weird it is for Barry to take time saving Iris to caress her hair and look at her more creepily in slow mo? Like yeah its in slow mo but still I think your priority should be to get everyone to safety as quick as possible and check if anyone else could get hurt. I will admit that Barry's speech as he is running so fast to reverse time at the end was really good. Tho the more I think about all the slow mo Flash scenes are good.

They still kept the "Let's use the mother box to bring back Superman plot". Why? This is a piece of tech that you don't fully understand how it works and you are going on the whims of someone you just met. Especially if they come back as a different person/mindset all together. If Superman 's death was the reason that allowed for the Mother box to call to Steppenwolf/Darkseid, what the hell were they doing prior to Superman's arrival on earth? I mean we've seen how easy it was for Steppenwolf to attain the two boxes even if they were guarded, so why the wait ?. I get that Batman is going through an arc and trying to change from the person he was but how does go from "1% chance of absolute certainty" to "let's go on a whim and have faith" when it comes to resurrecting Superman?

Its gonna be awkward as to how Clark will explain his sudden return from the grave around the same time Superman came back.

I was wondering when the Knightmare scene will play out. Jared leto's Joker isn't over with me, it seems way too try-hard to be edgy. Other than that yeah, not much I can say about it. Tho do we seriously need another iteration where Superman (or someone with Superman like powers) is evil?

I also love how nonchalant Bruce is about J'onn appearing in front him. However the revelation that J'onn was that army general all the time breaks so much of continuity (and just why now did you decide to show up and help and not idk the time Zod invaded and nearly terraformed earth, HELL WHY TF DIDN'T SHOW UP TO HELP THE LEAGUE IF YOU KNEW ABOUT DARKSEID, I'M SORRY TO RAG ON BUT REALLY THIS CAMEO JUST OPENS UP SO MANY QUESTIONS, IT JUST SEEMS LIKE AN "PALPATINE WAS BEHIND THIS ALL ALONG" KIND OF THING ).

In terms of getting a sequel, I am not sure if WB is going to go through with it given that their current vision seems to be a different route than the one Snyder intended so who knows. Despite my criticisms I do believe this is Snyder's best DCEU film to date and probably one of his better films. You could tell that he put in a lot to make this. The movie itself does have issues mostly due to the plot surrounding the motherbox as well as pacing. I would say it's worth the watch at least once, though I think its best to watch it in doses rather than one sitting. Ultimately this is the version that we should have gotten and I can see why so many people who were supportive of Zack wanted or vouched for him to finish it. Regardless, I think the very least I am happy for Snyder. If you like Snyder's previous stuff, you will like this one, if you don't, your perception of the film won't change significantly other than some cool bits here and there.

#dceu #justice league #snydercut #snydercut spoilers #dc comics

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ziracona · 4 years ago

Note

And I hate to do this- So on that thread, not that he's as bad, why do you think Michael is redeemable? (and also Frank) Especially by his main victim? :? I hope that isn't as bad or as judgmental as I think it sounds... - Sleepy (its like 5am here :3 living up to my name i see)

So, these I gave a short and a long answer for under cut, but forgot I’m on mobile and can’t do that. I can tag it “long post” but uhhh, sorry about this. Anyway, thats why Frank comes in two chunks. I wrote it expecting to be able to use a read more. :’-] also ya fine. And I hope you’re in bed 🤣 now. Okay so. Here’s my reasons:

For Michael, to start, Halloween is complicated af. You have to know what timeline people are talking about, because there are like 8+ and Michael has been written as a wildly different character by wildly different content creators, and I would not feel the same ways towards them all. They’re not the same character. When I talk about Michael, unless I’m going on about a specific other film, I mean either H20 canon, or DbD canon, which are in line with each other when it comes to characterization. (This also includes Halloween’s 1 & 2 in the H20 line, and Halloween 1 at least in DbD). In those timelines, Michael has like at best 2% agency and choice in his own life and what he becomes. That’s why I am sympathetic. I still root for Laurie to nail his ass to the wall of course, and everything he has done to hurt someone isn’t okay just because his life is unfair & awful & out of his control, but I still find him a very tragic character. He was canonically suffering violent psychosis his parents refused him treatment for, isolated with a monster as his doctor & only human contact for 15 years from age 6 on, overdosed on medications that when OD’d worsen psychosis symptoms and can cause permanent brain damage, and stuck like that until escaping briefly when he turned 21.

In Halloween canon, Michael tells his parents he hears voices telling him to do bad things like hurt people, but they tell him he is imagining stuff, and ignore his attempts to get help. The voices say they will be quiet, which is what he desperately wants, if he kills his sister Judith. So he does, at age six. Scientifically speaking, that’s literally too young to really have a complete grasp on death and mortality itself, let alone complex ethics. He immediately goes to his parents after doing the deed, so they can do whatever they need to do. Instead of getting him help, he is sentenced to 15 years in a 1960s American sanitorium (hell), until he turns 21 and can be tried for murder as an adult (fucking ridiculous and unfair?? Tried as an adult is for like, upper teens who commit heinous murders. How tf you justify trying a six year old literally too young to really understand murder as an adult for murdering someone??). They give him to Dr. Sam Loomis, a fucking horrible person, who says he spends 8 years trying to help Michael (a fkn lie), but canonically by only a few months of meeting the kid is thoroughly convinced he is evil, the devil or a demon in human form, faking his psychosis and side effect symptoms (trauma induced mutism from killing his sister, onset of catatonia/motion loss symptoms, etc, all of which are common with his disorder & trauma), desperate to kill again, and an evil mastermind doing the devil’s work, and says so. Spends four hours every day accusing Michael as a six year old child on, of planning to do horrible things and faking his illness and being a demon and not a human, and Loomis, from age 6 to 21, is this kid’s only human contact. And the staff knew it and how wrong and disturbed Loomis was, but did nothing. So from age 6 to 21—barring one or two visits from his mom & Laurie before his dad beat 4 year old Laurie for saying Michael’s, who he hated after Judith’s death, name—until she trauma blocked out having had a brother or sister at all, and then both parents died in a car crash—his only human contact in complete isolation was an adult man who told him for four hours a day he was an evil lying demon faking his symptoms and plotting murder and not a human and promised he would kill Michael and stop him, from childhood on, and that was it. He was never given an understanding of what was medically wrong with him, or that anything was at all. He was threatened and abused and kept overdosed on drugs for 15 years since early childhood, and his only understanding of the world taught in that absolute isolation, was that he was a demon who wanted to get out and kill again. And the violent psychosis, telling him if he killed both sisters, they would go away and leave him in peace with no more constant noise. With no normal understanding of the world or people or life like he was owed ever given to him, no understanding at all of what you were going through or were aside from the promise drilled into your head you were a monster who wanted to kill every day for 15 years while drugged up? Like, I’m a firm believe people are responsible for their own actions, but in a case as extreme as that, honestly, how else was that ever going to even be able to end? You forget, as a child. Who you used to be. That’s beyond grooming even, it’s being grown in a lab for the sole purpose of someday walking out, taking a large kitchen knife, and killing Laurie Strode. And it’s tragic. It’s unfair. Halloween is a tragedy, not a horror film. It didn’t have to be that way. He wanted help. He asked for help. Loomis is directly and pretty much solely responsible for the lives lost in 1978. You know he won’t even call Michael “him”? The only human he contact he had since age six on called him “it.” And no one stopped any of that. And even then. Even then, even with all that. With the drugs, and the lab grown killer, and all of it? Michael is pretty much the single least sadistic slasher killer there /is/.

Everyone he kills in Halloween? He kills fast. It’s actually kind of boring if you’re expecting a scary slasher, because there’s no chase until Laurie. He just appears, runs you through, and you die. Very fast. And if there is any emotion expressed towards the act of killing or aftermath, it’s not pleasure or hate or happiness, it’s curiosity, because literally everything is something he wasn’t allowed to experience growing up and just has no practical experience with yet. And on top of all that, he also just doesn’t kill people he doesn’t have to. He kills one man for clothes, kills Annie to re-do Judith’s murder since it didn’t work the first time and he needs both sisters for the voices to stop, and he kills Bob and Lynda becuase they stumble onto where he is & are a threat to success. (This + Judith 15 years prior is all the deaths in Halloween period, btw). Michael routinely only kills his target, and anyone who is a threat to success. Literally doesn’t even jump out to kill Bob or attack until Bob opens the door to the closet he was hiding in, and he has been seen. Walks past a security guard and lets him go in H20 becuase he doesn’t see him, steals keys from a mom with her 4 year old kid and doesn’t even hurt them because they don’t see him really either, steals a knife from an old lady making a sandwich who is one foot away but looking the other direction, so he lets her go. Even with all the possible stakes against him, really, Michael is like, the least cruel and most sympathetic and merciful version of that lab grown killer possible, which can only be a testament to the person he was initially/still somehow has managed to keep faint traces of alive inside.

As for Laurie finding him redeemable, answer is threefold I guess, and I’ll start with the most important. 1: in Halloween canon, Laurie cares for Michael and is incredibly sad about what he turned into and wishes he could be different (once she remembers who he is). That’s established canon, not a choice of mine. In Halloween 2, she tries to talk him down before shooting him, and he hesitates when she says his name and lowers his weapon for a moment. In H20, she talks about him a lot & even asks her boyfriend (a psychologist) if he thinks something so traumatic can happen to someone that they can never recover, bc even though she hasn’t seen him in 20 years, he’s still on her heart. She hesitates to kill him once she has him helpless in the finale, and when he reaches out for her hand, she almost cries and starts to reach back because it’s what she has truly wanted for so long. 2: Michael & Laurie are siblings, and that’s a very important relationship to me. Obviously, there’s lines where you cross, it’s fkn over, but it is special, and I’m weak for it. They were both cheated of the good family life they could have had, and I like characters I care for getting recovery and rehabilitation, and I would like them to be able to recover and have whatever fragments of the lives they wanted which are still possible. And then 3: Laurie is his victim, but they’re also both victims of Loomis, and the system, and her parents, and if she does /wish/ for him to be okay and things to be like they were, which was canon before me, so she does, then I think them finding happiness and her relief and new hope in regained family and him redemption and rehabilitation through the quite literally only person he has /ever/ known who treated him well or like even a human at all & is still living, that’s so good. It’s sweet, and it makes sense. I like broken people putting the pieces together and finding ways to be okay. None of the shit that happened to either of them was okay, and Michael sure did fucking do it, but it’s about as “it’s complicated” as literally possible, and Laurie wants him to be her brother again, and Michael deserves a chance to experience personhood enough to want anything like that again too, and I think it’s sweet. To be able to find happiness and peace and a new life in that rubble. It shouldn’t be possible, because Halloween is a tragedy that never gets a happy ending, no matter how many timelines they create or versions they tell, but I wish it could have one. It needs one. At least one, among all the fated tragedies for those two cruelly cursed siblings. They both had their lives stolen. Michael by Loomis, and Laurie by Michael. And I want them to find those stolen lives again. And if they can do it together, that’s a very odd and unusual set of circumstances for that kind of thing, but it’s a very complete way to tell the story. He tried to kill her, but if she asked him to stop and he stopped, if he himself chose to change on his own, when it really, really mattered—decided that it was what he wanted more than all the things he was before, and she decided that was enough, and they could both have a future as family? I like that. It’s a happy ending stolen back.

Long Frank Answer, in case you /have/ read ILM & thus short answer did not answer your question: So. Again, for me, I always talk about Frank as in the version of him I myself write, and I wrote ILM before the archives retcon, and also just ignore them because they’re usually dumb and blatantly contradict well established and longstanding canon. Even then, I usually don’t like Frank though—didn’t like him when I started writing ILM. But Frank has very little established canon character. All there is for sure is he was a foster kid that went through some bad stuff, he met Julie and changed his mind about desperately trying to be homed somewhere other than with Clive bc he liked Julie a lot, he met Susie and Joey, they became a gang chilling in Ormond’s abandoned lodge, then tried to rob a store Joey was fired from, were surprised by a cleaner who grabbed Julie, and Frank impulse stabbed him, freaked, and ordered the others to finish it with him and be in it together. Then before they’d even really finished burying the body, they got snagged. That leaves a whole lot of personality and thoughts and motivations and future choices and person wildly undetermined. Writing, sometimes characters just do their own thing completely out of my control, and I have to adapt. Frank chose not to kill Meg at the end of Tenacity, Adrenaline, & Grit, which surprised me, because he’d been nothing but a dipshit asshole bastard till one minute ago, but I knew it was because he recognized what she’d tried to do at great pain to herself because she wouldn’t bow down and die, and he connected/empathized or sympathized on some level. He also couldn’t go through with killing Quentin immediately after being helped by him in Distortion/Iron Maiden. Neither was like, planned. It’s just who the character was. I was frustrated. I did not want to like or feel sympathy for Frank at all. Then in The Lost, Jeff just fkn hijacked the whole plot and added 20 pages not in the outline because he wanted to be kind to Frank & it’s not like I can stop characters when they do whatever they do. And while writing it, I got to know that the version of Frank Morrison in the world I was writing—which is always the version I refer to/think of him as & write now myself—was not somebody past saving. He’s a piece of shit and he’s done fucked up and inexcusable stuff, and he pays for it. In many ways, Frank gets away with a lot over the course of ILM, but it’s always because characters choose on their own to forgive him, not because they or he doesn’t think it was fucked. And Frank suffers—a lot—for his choices, and has to live through appropriate and large amounts of regret and remorse about stuff he did before the end. He gets the chance to make better choices several times, and mostly he doesn’t. He continues to fuck up. But right near the end, he makes a couple good decisions when it’s down to the wire, sees where his bad choices got him and what he has to live with, and then he does live with it. He almost dies, and then ends up falling on Jeff’s mercy, which he knows he doesn’t deserve and doesn’t expect to get, for a last chance to make it, and because Jeff is an ungodly kind and forgiving soul, he makes it.

Frank isn’t a good person, and he does a lot of stuff that isn’t remotely okay or justified or excused, but he /is/ a kid—the upper end of it, but he’s not a full grown adult. He has every reason to believe nothing of himself or others, a fucked up childhood and life which isn’t his fault, and the Entity got all four Legion kids before they’d even had time to process the one and only violent crime they did (which was unplanned), and it is historically running a PHD in psychological warfare vs everyone. Absolutely none of that excuses or justifies him, but it is an explanation for some of it that is not as bad as say, doing that shit for fun or cruelty or hate or what have you, which makes him a bad person, but one with a lot more humanity left than say, Kenneth. Who is at -100 or something. If he’s still got a lot of humanity left, that means he could be redeemed, and he eventually chooses that path for himself and hits the appropriate “I did something horrible. Fuck. It was really bad. I should not have done it.” “I am really sorry I did this. I feel awful. I’m sorry.” “I cant change it, but I can try to do better and make whatever reparations I can.” “I want to be better, and I am going to try.” necessary stages of actually trying to improve. So, I like him. He did a lot of really awful shit that wasn’t okay, but he was never without sympathetic elements. He does love his friends and his girlfriend, he is a good boyfriend to Julie and selfless towards her and his crew (overall anyway—has even risked death for them very willingly, even the one who was fighting with/kinda hated him), will keep his word in deals and has some semblance of both sympathy and honor, feels guilt, is a kid, did not choose this life but was rather catapulted into it and too weak to climb out once he landed in the mud. All of that together makes him someone I feel sympathy towards and find quite redeemable, so long as he will decide he wants that, which, in ILM, he does. If you just meant Frank in general then idk how to answer because there’s not much established Frank period it’s kinda a shell like all original dead by daylight characters, and I have no thoughts on it by itself because it’s not a whole person, and so I really only think of Frank as ILM verse Frank now.

#ask #sleepy #hope this is coherant. I love answering but I’m also on vacation trip rn so I’m not proofreading & u get what u get 🤣 adds flavor #in living memory (fic)#in living memory #spoilers #ILM spoilers #Halloween #dead by daylight #long post #Michel is not the villain of Halloween: he and Laurie are both the victims & it’s a fkn Greek tragedy #they both deserved so much more than the lives they were thrown into #: (#sad now just thinkin bout it

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lunasxsol · 5 years ago

Text

Love Like This

Bill Skarsgård x Reader

Word Count: 2194

Warnings: Abortion

(A/N: If you do not believe a woman should have a choice on her body then you can fuck off thank you vm. On another note I hope you enjoy this angsty fic. I just had this idea lingering in my mind so it’s here now..)

As I sat in the waiting room dreading my name being called, I looked at the other women that look terrified to go into one of the rooms. Some of them came alone as myself and others came with their significant others or friends. A nurse had brought over a clipboard with some paper I had to sign. I was so nervous I couldn't keep my hands from shaking, I felt like I was going to pass out. Someone took my hand in theirs, I look up to see my best friend Maia. She took me in her arms as I silently cried.

"It's okay, I'm here."

"I thought I was gonna have to go through this alone."

She shook her head taking the clipboard from me, "I would never let you do this alone. Now you sit and calm down and I'll fill this for you okay?" I nodded taking a drink from my water.

Once she finished filling out the forms she handed them back to the nurse and we waited to be called over.

"Y/n L/n"

I got up quickly as did Maia, "You'll be alright, I'll wait here." She gave me a hug and a quick kiss on the head."

"Alright hun lets get you prepped." The nurse said as she took me to one of the operating rooms.

After 15 mins the procedure was finally done, they took me to the recovery room where Maia sat on the couch waiting for me. The nurse, Stella, handed me a cup of water and some pain meds before she went back to her office.

"You okay?" I nodded laying on the bed, Maia took my hand in hers. "He called." I stayed quiet not carrying what he had to say. "He called me too, I didn't pick up."

"Maia, I don't care anymore. I needed him here more than anything and he left me." My eyes started watering once again. "We'd been together for two years and he couldn't respect my one difficult decision. He can go to hell for all I care."

We stayed quiet for a while until the doctor came back and discharged me. Maia took drove us home, I thanked her for being there for me, "I'm going to sleep early today, goodnight Maia." She nodded.

I went into my room shutting the door quickly, taking a seat on my bed and letting myself cry. Maybe if we had gone through this conversation differently then maybe he would've respected my decision.

[Flashback]

I looked at the pregnancy test that read PREGNANT in its bold letters. What the hell was I gonna do? I'm only 19, I'm still enrolled in the uni. I have so much ahead of me. I can't put it aside, I've worked too hard for it.

"Hey babe!" Bill spoke as he walked into my room. "So my parents are having a celebratory dinner for Alexander- hey what's wrong?" He turned me around and I handed him the test. "Hey its alright, we'll figure this out."

I shook my head, "I'm not ready."

He pulled me into a hug sighing, "Neither am I but we can do this. You have me.. till the end."

"No you don't understand.. I'm not ready, I can't have a baby right now, Bill."

"So what you're going to give it up?" I nodded. "You're kidding right?"

"Bill, we aren't ready. Do you not get it?" I threw the pregancy test in the trash brushing past him and taking a seat on my bed. "Your body isn't going to go through the entire change. I am not you. You get to walk around and continue to do your shit while I go to class carrying the child and getting called a whore for opening my legs at a young age. So yes I am going to give it up because I'm too fucking young to have a child."

"Fuck them, you shouldn't give a fuck of what other people say about you. God knows I don't so neither should you."

I chuckled, "My parents sacrificed so much so they can send me here to study at the uni of my choice, I'm not messing it up because of our fuck up."

"So what our child is a fuck up now?" He was red with anger.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it that way but if you loved me you would respect my decision."

"I love you (Y/n but I'm sorry, I don't agree with it. So whatever you're thinking of doing to our 'fuck up' you can do it alone." He left slamming the door loudly leaving me completely alone.

[End of flashback]

I sat up turning the tv on to have some sort of background noise. There was a knock at my door I groaned not wanting to see Maia or anyone at the moment. "Maia I'm okay, I just want to sleep."

The door was opened and a tall figure had walked in.

"Hey."

"Get out."

"I'm sorry."

"Get the fuck out." He didn't listen and instead kept coming closer. "Bill seriously get the fuck out."

"I need to talk to you."

I chuckled, "Well if it's to try and change my mind you can kindly fuck off cause the procedures done and so are we."

"I know it's done and I should've been there." I finally looked up at him his eyes sunken and red. "I'm sorry, I should have respected your decision because it's your body. I was just happy that we were gonna have a baby. I thought you wanted one."

"I did, I do, just not now. Not till I was settled." He nodded both our eyes brimming with tears. "Bill I need a break, a really long break. You fucked up and I-I don't know anymore. Look I'm 19 you're 26, I don't want kids till I'm like 30 or maybe never I don't know. And well with the way you reacted it's evident you want kids now. I knew this relationship wasn't gonna last."

"Hey, hey, I do want kids but I can wait. Just don't-don't leave, please." He took my hand in his but I quickly moved it away.

I sighed now full on crying, "I'm sorry Bill but this isn't gonna work out. You can find someone your age that you can settle down with now. I still have years before I'll even remotely be sure if I want kids. By then you'll be in your mid 30s, which is besides the point but what if I don't want kids what will you do then?" He shrugged his shoulders crying silently. "I love you Bill but we can't be together anymore."

He got up pressing a lingering kiss on my forehead, "I'm sorry."

***

3 years later

Today was finally moving day. I had finished my studies in New York and I was moving back down to LA. My parents were a bit against it since we had lived there years ago but they hated it there but I loved it. I was moving down by the beach areas. Maia was staying here with her fiancé.

"Well Ms. those are the last of your boxes." I handed the movers a decent tip and they went on their way.

I turned to Maia as she was already getting emotional, "Hey no crying, it's bad for the baby."

She chuckled pulling me in for a tight hug, "Hey me and Rosalie are gonna miss you."

I pulled away immediately in shock, "it's a girl?" She nodded causing me to shriek in excitement. Tyler came into the room and I jumped on him. "Congrats!"

"We were actually wondering if you would like to organize the baby shower for us." Tyler spoke.

"Yes of course!"

"We wanted to do it in 4 months. Closer to her due date."

"Once I get everything situated in LA I'll get things prepped and fly back here to organize everything!"

There was a honk outside of our house.

"Well guys I will see you in 4 months!" I hugged them both goodbye and grabbed my suitcase getting into the taxi.

***

2 weeks later

I was finally getting the finishing touches to my new house down. I still had a bit of work left but everything was mostly good to go. Now I currently sat in my living room going through a couple of designs for tomorrow's meeting. With the help of one of my close celebrity friends he got me a job with Leah Valderia a famous singer from London. She wanted help with her house and of course I said yes. This could be a great opportunity for my interior design career.

It was getting late and I decided to call it a night. I would show her the designs I had and maybe go shopping with her for some of the things.

The next morning I made sure to wake up early. I took a quick shower to calm my nerves. For my outfit I decided on a corduroy skirt that was a creamy chocolate color and a black turtle neck that fit perfectly. I also went with a dark grey oversized blazer that was just an inch longer than my skirt, for shoes I went with some heeled ankle boots. I did some light makeup and left my hair in its regular straight style. I added just some thin gold necklaces just to bring the whole outfit together. I looked at the time and grabbed my purse and work folders quickly heading out of my house. Before leaving the lot I sent a quick text to Leah letting her know I was on my way.

The traffic to her mansion was horrible to say the least. Luckily I made it on time, I parked my car on the curb and jogged to her door. "Great you're here, please come in!"

Looking around I could definitely see some potential for this beautiful home, "So Y/n I'm so excited you're here. I'm hoping you can bring my vision to life!" We took a seat in her office and she opened her laptop sliding it towards me. She had quite the vision. "I will sure try."

We were in her office for two hours, let's just say she is completely indecisive about what she wants to do with this place. So beautiful and so much potential only her vision was nothing like mine. "So we can definitely do what you want to do and we can also add some color maybe open up these curtains here as well just to get some light and more open space."

"Great! Let me show you the nursery so you can kind of get an idea of what we can with it. This baby will be here in 3 months need to have it done before anything else."

"What are you having?"

"A girl! I'm so excited, I hope one day you get to experience how beautiful it is to carry a life."

I smiled not really knowing what to say I just nodded, "Hey honey, I'm home, brought the- Y/n?"

"Bill?"

"You guys know each other?"

"We-"

"I-"

"We dated years ago."

"Oh?" Leah looked down. "Is she?" Bill only nodded.

"I'm sorry, I'm gonna go. I can send you an email of other designers if-"

Leah shook her head, "No I love your work, that's why I called in for you. This thing you and Bill had is in the past so I would still like to work with you if that's alright."

I nodded, "Well I'll email you some of the ideas I have then we can get started immediately. I'll be back in a week?"

"Perfect."

"Well I'll see you Leah, beautiful house you have here."

Bill set his things down, "I'll walk her out." Leah only nodded.

My car was only a block away but as we walked it felt like it was miles away. "Congratulations." I broke the silence.

"Thank you." He smiled.

"I told you, you would find someone to make you happy. Look at you, you're gonna have a baby."

"Yeah, I'm really happy, but I'm still really sorry about what happened between you and I. I'm sorry we didn't work out and I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me the most. I should have been there for you."

I sighed trying not to cry, "It was a bit traumatizing, having the procedure done is weird and horrible but it had to be done. I don't think I would've been happy if we went through with the pregnancy. I never want to be resentful towards a kid that wasn't at fault you know." He nodded. "I went to therapy after we broke up, got back on my feet and now I'm okay with it. I'm happy for you and happy that you're with someone that can give you the life you deserve."

He pulled me in for a hug giving me a kiss on the forehead, "I love you Bill Skarsgård."

"I love you too Y/n L/n and I wish you nothing but the best."

#bill skarsgård fanfiction #bill skarsgård imagine #bill skarsgård x reader #angst #heartbreak #fluff #roman godfrey #pennywise #roman godfrey imagine #pennywise imagine #smut

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