#okay i need to put this somewhere so this is the vent-type thing

[musical-dash-trash]

hey this is a little vent-y so if you don’t want to read that just scroll away really fast please!!

ew depression

[gravity-barbie]

The Hargreeves' reactions to you getting catcalled

A/N: Sorry, I think I accidentally deleted the original request for this, because I could not find it anywhere

Masterlist

Luther Hargreeves

-Luther is shocked and outraged, getting up in the perpetrator’s face immediately, and probably scaring the crap out of them with that stature of his

-As much as he thinks the person deserves a good beating, they’re already pretty much at his mercy so instead he just demands an apology for you

-He’s so soft and considerate to you afterwards, triple checking that you’re okay and questioning if there’s anything else he can do, literally anything

-The incident makes him more protective, he’s always volunteering to accompany you when you go out, and pretty much insists if he thinks the area you’re headed seems shady

Diego Hargreeves

-Diego already hates catcalling but the fact that it’s directed at you just makes him extra pissed, slightly unhinged even, he advances on them while yelling insults, fully ready to get violent

-Even if you want and are able to drag him away, he’s probably already hatching a plan to come back for some vigilante justice later

-He’s pretty heated, but he does recognise that you must feel way worse than him and that he should prioritise your feelings, checking if you’re alright, and even if you brush it off he’s perceptive enough to get a read on how you really feel

-If you’re very upset, despite his anger he gets a hold of himself and turns into the sweetest marshmallow while trying to comfort you

Allison Hargreeves

-Allison tenses up, checking your reaction first and foremost, if you want to ignore it and get out of there she’ll just put a protective hand on you and usher you forward

-But if not, or if the catcaller is being persistent, she is more than willing to confront them and make them regret ever opening their disgusting mouth

-Depending on her relationship with her power at the time she’d be quick to rumour them, probably not physically hurt them (depending on how graphic they were being) but at the very least put the fear of god in them

-She’s had a lot of experience with things like this, so she comforts you with a lot of understanding and empathy, pretty accurately predicting your feelings and needs

Klaus Hargreeves

-Klaus’ policy has always been to brush off stuff like this with a sassy remark and move on, he wishes he was the type of person that could easily defend you but he just isn’t

-He does have the urge to talk shit back to them, even to his own detriment, and if he was alone he might, but you’re here and he’s not going to risk any further trouble for you by causing a scene

-He asks if you’re okay but otherwise tries to change the topic and lighten the atmosphere pretty quickly, he does care of course, he just thinks the best thing he can do is cheer you up

-Maybe later when you’re less shaken he’ll bring it up again, just to see if you’re really okay, let you vent if you need to or see if there’s anything he can do

Five Hargreeves

-Five is caught somewhere between wanting to ignore it and wanting to pull out those assassin skills of his

-It depends on how you react, if you just huff and keep walking he’ll ask if you’re alright but drop it when you do, if you seem shaken up though, there’s no way he’s letting it go

-Internally he’s livid, but he acts more cocky than anything else as he gives them both a physical and verbal beating, finishing it off with a warning that they better not harass anyone again

-He isn’t good at comfort, he’ll never bring this up again if you don’t, but if you do want to talk he’s there for you, trying his best to offer the kindness you need

Viktor Hargreeves

-On pure instinct Viktor confronts them, not before manoeuvring you protectively behind him though

-His exterior is icy, and way more dangerous than this person realises, if they don’t back down he won’t hesitate to pull his powers out to back up his warning, after all he’s had a bad experience with this kind of thing before

-Though if you try to pull him away, for your sake he’ll go, since your comfort and sense of safety is more important than his righteous anger, the fear alone will teach them a lesson anyway

-He’s very sweet and attentive afterwards, and whether you need silence, to vent or to be distracted he's got you covered

[kalims]

Hi, there! :D

I don't know if my request will be taken into account but you mentioned that it's okay to try.

I am not throwin' away my shot >:D (sorry my indoor theater kid comes out from time to time)

Type: Headcanons

Reader: Neutral

Scenary: The NCR boys see that a student from Noble Bell College or RSA who has been trying to flirt with the prefect, in a bold move steals the prefect's (first) kiss. How would they react and what would they feel?

I feel like it would be a rollercoaster of occurrences and complete chaos in NCR xD

If my request does not convince you, you can discard it without problems, but if not, take your time and without pressure, thank you 💐🌼✨👍✍️I love your TWST fics they always make me smile .

whisk away

premise. despite your many efforts of evading your seeming admirer, they remain persistent in their pursuit. you've considered just leaving them in the dust without an explanation whatsoever but you're too stunned to process the fact that they've just kissed you without a warning. next thing you know there's a murderous aura approaching.

characters. silver, jade, deuce, kalim, vil

note. you didn't really specify which characters jhshs so I took the liberty of scouring your blog and just put the ones you seem to like ^^ and I kid you not, used a wheel for the other 2 lol (so sorry, was gonna post this earlier but got busy since presentations came up so I only finished now.)

silver

has a mixture of shock and anger. which is mostly for your sake honestly, he wasn't gonna intervene cause he felt like you would wanna deal with it on your own so he feels the absolute mortification slipping into his bones. if he wasn't fully awake, then he definitely is now!

fully ready to talk some sense into that idiot who has no sense of space, hello?

last time he knew, you weren't really dating anyone. silver would know if you did, cause you both talk practically everyday and a lover would be something he should be aware of... unless you didn't talk? I mean, who else would just kiss you like that?

someone unpleasant. he decides. one look at your face and he knows immediately that it wasn't something you expected as well.

just pulls up with a rare look of anger directed to the student, brows furrowed, shoulders tense and all. everyone's used to the serene, calm look on his features so seeing him look so different probably put off said student so they scampered after a promise made by silver if they dared to stick around.

"leave, or find out what happens if you don't."

gone is the anger *poof* and is fretting over you now. are you okay? do you want him to knock some sense into that idiot? literally tell him anything, order him to do anything, and he'll do it (within reason) my guy is just here for your sake tbh.

kinda gloomy cause damn, that was your first? he wanted both of yours to be first and some grade a hole just decided to shatter all that. it makes him all the more irritated so if he can't have your first kiss, he'll just take your second, and every single other kiss you'll give.

jade

take the murderous aura and multiply it tenfold!!

jade doesn't really need to reach you and make his presence known by a few words cause it seems like everyone but you within 10 feet radius of him is sensing the murderous aura he's emitting. if it's not feeling that, then it's seeing the eery dark smile present on his face.

and he seems to be having a death march towards a specific direction so everybody knows where to avoid atleast. cause it seems like anyone on his path is gonna get trampled and no one likes a messy hall.

student in front of you pales, deluding themselves that maybe he's just heading somewhere behind them to vent out that rage or something but they glance behind and almost piss their pants when there is in fact, no one present near anywhere and he's getting closer.

so... they wanted to live so they just bolted out. an experience with one of the tweels won't be good news, and if jade is the one who has them in his sights... they'll take the head start thank you very much.

with the students face memorized and tucked into a corner of his mind he smiles almost innocently at you when you spot him and strike the most casual of conversation.

well, that's under the guise atleast. he's shooting you subtle questions about that person to which you reply innocently. oblivious to the grave you're digging for them yourself.

oddly enough jade started being strangely affectionate, a hand on the small of your back, maybe on your shoulder, arm, or a pat on your head as gratitude. but he seems to like kissing the back of your hand a lot...

*turns his head in their direction after kissing your hand*

deuce

I'll be perfectly honest. he doesn't really have much of an impact in terms of the intense aura that should have been felt. he looks a normal degree of angry, that's why the person hasn't gotten chased off even with the clear signs that deuce will be swinging a fist at probes.

unfortunate that's exactly what the person does. despite your clear reaction of disgust they still use you to rile up deuce. cooing at him while reaching for you, and chuckling about how they didn’t even know him, nor is it any of his business to interfere between two... lovers?

oh so they wanted to impact? they're gonna get one right now 👊 since it seems like they want to get to know him so bad they can get well acquainted with his fists, you know?

he made a promise to himself not to get involved with these type of mishaps! or at the very least resort to more peaceful methods than using violence as a sort of communication. the guilt eats him up a little but he thinks he'd never stand for someone who would disrespect you so blatantly!

almost comically, he looks like he spouts a pair of ears that of a dog's and turns to you. looking more apologetic compared to the fiery look he had a second ago, if he had a tail it would be tucked between his legs out of shame or something.

"I'm really sorry," he says. sulking. deuce apologizes to you, not for his choice of knocking out this random in the middle of the street but because of the fact that he did it in front of you. (also he's kinda jealous...)

if asked, he can, and WILL do it again.

don't blame him though! discreetly whisks you away to grab a bite. having literally no regards to the body looking like it's soul got knocked out laying, and looking out of place on the ground. maybe someone will check on them but definitely not him, they deserve it!

kalim

gasps loudly. "noooo!"

which is like a public proclamation that seeing that did everything but please him. which also means he's basically admitting he's jealous in an indirect way, might as well just say he likes you or something (he probably will if asked because he thinks it's nothing worthy of hiding.)

bounds up to you asking who that is quite loudly to the point where it would seem like he just stumbled upon you cheating on him. it doesn't help that he actually looks sad, teary and all. jamil is off, having paused in his trail since he was previously chasing the boy who ran off.

now he isn’t sure if he wants to get involved now. this is so embarrassing.

lowkey other student would just look back and forth to you, then to kalim. the latter in question unintentionally ignored his existence to be honest, since he was too busy shaking your shoulders and probing the answer of you.

"why would you kiss a stranger...?" he trails off, you did answer. kalim is genuinely wondering to himself if it was that easy cause damn, he scratches his head. that made no sense (says the guy who is making no sense.)

he makes it so obvious that he's pondering with the finger under his chin, eyes lost pointed at the air and the unnecessary loud humming... at this point the atmosphere became more awkward because you and the student is staring at him in bewilderment.

drag him off please, and explain it to him elsewhere. public is NOT a good place. so instead of him saving you out of a situation like this, you save him? talk about being built different...

vil

what in the sevens... he surely hopes his eyes are working correctly lest he needs contact lens, or glasses for that matter. either way he'll positively be as beautiful as he ever was.

although he's very pleased that someone notices the extent of your beauty, there are... other ways to express fondness admiration for you, and vil just can't respect someone who doesn't seem to have any shame for themselves for pressing on boundaries.

so this... fool clearly is a mere taint on your image!!! rid of them immediately! you needn't dirty your pretty mouth, rook does love cleansing the world of dirt like them so it's for the better good if they just never dare to appear to your face ever again.

what better way to hurt someone than aim for their pride? *trash talks so good about their attitude that they actually be pondering their life choices*

don't get him wrong. he doesn't like them, like at all. vil can full well do more damage by nit picking details about them they probably aren't even aware of but he'd never willingly give another person a reason to be insecure about themselves, even if they did terrible things.

plus, there's better ways to teach someone a lesson. they'll learn.

who wouldn’t be scared of an angry vil? they scampered away pretty quickly from a few words, even quicker when he mentioned rook but it's their problem to be paranoid whether the hunter is following them or not to be honest.

frets over you right after. living the dream.

[luffyvace]

Aizawa crush headcanons

”aizawa crush headcanons, but like make him realize he’s in love with you at the end, so that like, he can do something about it or he can’t ignore it”

asked by a good friend of mine irl. she didn’t mention gender so i’m going with afab since i haven’t written for that yet ♡

(ps i’m not going to mention what type of person he would like unless you req that i want to keep this as neutral as possible)

aizawa having a crush on you means finding cats to take care of together

it means warm, comfortable, solidarity silence

he would still be himself around you for sure, he would want you to like him for who he is

changing himself is too much effort. if you don’t like him back he’ll have to move on whether it hurts or not

people still need teaching and saving after all and the world isn’t going to stop just for him

being a realist he’s aware of that

but that doesn’t mean he isn’t going to clean up if you go out somewhere together (prior to dating, first impressions are everything)

he wouldn’t be afraid to tell you like it is if you ask for his opinion,

in his eyes sugarcoating things aren’t going to help you

but he wouldn’t necessarily be as harsh on you as he is on his students or mic

to woo you he wouldn’t really do anything above and beyond

he acknowledges that he likes you but he doesn’t want to waste time if his crush on you doesn’t blossom into something bigger

so instead of going all out he relies on things like little compliments, little favors and quality time

examples;

”you don’t look half bad today l/n”

”not too shabby, i guess” *combs hand through hair* (yeah that’s another thing, he’ll do little gestures to sway you but we’ll dabble into that more later)

”you smell fresh, that’s a nice aroma”

for little favors……

you: “ahh crap i left my keys in my car”

him: *magically knows a way to open locked out cars* you: *clearly having a rough day* him: *opens a window for you to vent* you: “awww man the last of ____ is sold out!”

him: “hmm..well, i’ll keep an eye out for when it’s back in stock” *the very next day* “oh yeah turns out i already had one i just forgot, here you can have it”

im not lying he actually did have one and forgot

as far as quality time:

inviting each other over for movie nights (he always falls alseep so you get most of the popcorn- 🎉 unless it’s his favorite movie- then he stays up eyes red and all, while sucking nothing out of an empty juicy box)

although movie night only happens when your closer friends though- he keeps his friend circle small because anyone could betray him and he doesn’t like people (he doesn’t hate them either he just stays to himself)

quality time for him can also be texting and checking up on each other

it doesn’t always have to be physical for him to feel appreciated

if YOU want to sway HIM though

get him a cat

self explanatory

but you can also listen to him when he talks, shoulder massages (only when your real close tho), give it to him straight.. definitely don’t be phony…and yeah!

pretty much be yourself

if he doesn’t fall for you himself there’s no way to convince him to

and if he falls for you it’s not for any facade you put on

its for your real true self

your personality.

he accepts your flaws and who you are but he will talk to you about bettering yourself a few times if they’re really bad and habitual (which he’s perfect if you have low self esteem because he’ll help you realize you might be overthinking and underestimating yourself, bringing you back to reality like the realist he is)

he’s not necessarily judgmental though

i feel like the part of him that’s not afraid to tell it like it is, is being misunderstood as him being judgmental

anyway that’s for when he has a crush on you

now its time for love

😍

okay so what (for), when, where and why right?

(“what about who? 🤓☝️“ YOU, FOOL!)

so what (for):

i dabbled in this okay? he loves your personality

for your flaws, your strengths, your weaknesses, your IQ (high or low), your fears

he loves everything about you

when?:

probably when you guys are pretty close

not him and mic close

but y’all have been friends for some time now

i say a couple of months

he doesn’t fall fast

maybe first though, if you an oblivious typa person

where (does he realize);

he was probably sitting on his couch after dinner, waiting for his shower to get hot, snug as a bug in his sleeping bag, drinkin a juicy box.

see the vision?

okay

so he was thinkin n thinkin n thinkin…

about you.

wait.

about you

why was he thinking so much about you.

omg wait..

he just remembered..

your beautiful smile (don’t care if it’s crooked, missing teeth, over/underbite- it’s GOREGEOUS)

your beautiful hair

your beautiful eyes

your personality

he realized he was thinking about you so much because…

he loves you

sits there head empty for a hot minute…

then falls asleep..

(rip water bill- shower still running)

why?:

wym why he fell in love? your YOU!!

your amazing even if he doesn’t say it all the time

or even if you don’t think it

even if no else thinks it!

someone does!

him!

he’s not the type of person to romanticize the person he loves

but he does accept you!

but as i said he loves you most for personality!

purely, truly—you

now let’s dabble back into the little gestures he’ll do to sway you once he realizes he loves you

for one like i said he’ll comb his hair in his fingers

and if he sees you find that attractive he’ll do it a little more around you

now keep in mind

your special

he doesn’t go around doing things like that for just anyone

no matter how small the change if it’s not beneficial he won’t do it

but this is beneficial

because he’s trying to court you ;)

he loves you, and he wants you to love him back now :)

but anyways

back on topic

he’ll also shrink his personal bubble around you

so now you can;

stand a little closer than normal

brush your fingers together

have your arms side by side

touch knees together when sitting

lay your head in his lap during movie night and he won’t say anything

(he wouldn’t pet your head but he’s not going to move you either)

rest your head on his shoulder as he does stuff/work (usually in private like when he’s planning his lessons on weekends)

speaking of that you can now come over unannounced and he’ll be glad to see you, ask you about your day, etc

back on topic to gestures he does,

his favors can get more personal,

like if you need to run errands but aren’t feeling well he’ll go shopping for you

(although i will say he doesn’t like shopping and has no idea what brands of products you normally buy he’ll do it to help you out)

he’ll also feel comfortable putting his arm on your shoulder (not around, on)

the gestures aren’t a lot because he isn’t the most cuddly guy (in my realistic headcanons)

but they mean something to you

AN: i tried to write canon aizawa more than fanon because it’s better that way to me but if anyone wants a little more cuddly/fanon aizawa i’d be happy to give it to them

i’m really happy with the way this turned out so i hope everyone can enjoy as well

ps: if you want specifically how he asks you out id love to do that (i might do it anyways 😋)

[fleshengine]

okay I feel terrible but instead of doing the things that feeling terrible makes me want to do I'm going to talk about it because that's all I'm good for. This is going to be vent-y again, and probably long so have this cut for your trouble. No obligation to read, I just need to type it somewhere.

I don't want to post anymore. I don't want to reblog I don't want to talk to people I want people to think I died. I don't know exactly why I want this. I think maybe I want people to know I'm sad and feel bad for me? It's definitely a pattern I've noticed, when I feel bad I reclusify myself and wait for people to check on me. I've been indulging in this behavior already. If I've seemed quiet tonight that's because I'm been putting everything in my queue. I also paused my queue already.

I want to make a post basically rping a robot rebooting, going through my current status and how I'm feeling. This is new, I don't normally think about that. Additionally it's sort of in the context of "after not posting for days, make a post about restarting and feeling terrible but make it thematic." It's in the same vein of making people pity me.

Here I am doing not those things. instead I'm going to continue to post because believe it or not I think tumblr has a net positive on my mental health. I really care about a lot of you people and I think if I avoided tumblr for days it would make the situation worse. I'm going to continue on with my life you know?

It's okay to feel sad and angry, it's not okay to let it rule you and I have a habit of letting particular sources of sadness rule me. I don't owe my mom anything anymore. Certainly not my time and thoughts. Maybe I can get over it and be her kid again. Maybe I won't ever. Maybe I'll drive up to her place some day and make her beg for her life down the barrel of the 357 magnum she keeps on her dresser. I don't know.

What I do know is that I've let her ruin too many of my days. Too many times has a call or a text from her sent me spiralling. I can't change her but I can change me and I'm going to change for the better, the stronger. I'm going to stand up straight, smile, and move on with my life.

I love myself too much to not at least try to be uplifting.

[poognthebrainbois]

Gaahh I hate being anxious again about things that already happened and do. not. matter !

We got kicked out a Syscord server because of a vent Lio posted (this one). He forgot their rules included not using all caps ever, since we've been primarily active on another server that was okay with it as long as it was censored. That, and him typing "KYS", while meant to be hyperbolic, was obviously against the rules. Since he up just copy-pasted and censored the whole thing, I don't think he remembered that was in there. Either way he didn't care. He says kys to inanimate objects that don't cooperate. It's become a general expression of exasperation to him.

But I got really anxious about it because I didn't get the chance to apologize for it (that's not entirely true, I could've responded to their message about kicking us with an apology but since the message stated that they were just looking for confirmation that we'd seen it, I followed that instruction alone).

This was almost a week ago and I just got all overwhelmed all over again because I passed a post on here from the owner of that server, forgetting we were following them here. And I thought about reaching out to apologize but that would be too much and probably creepy and might even make things worse. So instead I'm vague-posting because I'm still stressed about it and need to put my feelings somewhere.

No hate to them or the server or anything, just throwing my stress at the void.

[aajjks]

TC!dad!JK

“sweet dreams, girls” you whisper to ayra and ji-eun who have just laid down for their nap and once they’re asleep, you head to jaehan’s room to put him to sleep for his nap too. you spend a little time with jawon who was studying about different types of fruits he could grow in the garden and you offered to help him plant the seeds with him. next is areum who was already asleep by the time you went to check on her and last was ae-cha who was talking with her brother who had a face full of tears.

“ae-cha? jinseoul? what’s wrong?” you worriedly ask. “you and dad…jinseoul said you guys are going to divorce” she cries.

“what? wh-no! no, of course we aren’t”

“but you guys hate each other. y-you hate him don’t you, mom? i’m sorry, it’s all my fault. i ruined you relationship with him and—,” jinseoul cries and you pull both of your children in for a hug to console them.

“your father and i are not going to divorce. we’re just..i’m upset at your father, that’s all. what we have going on has nothing to do with what happened, seoul i promise. it’s not your fault. neither of you are to blame”

“but do you hate him?” ae-cha sniffles.

“no no no no. i do not hate your father. i love him but your mother just needs some space from him”

“s-space?”

“that’s all, i promise. i’ll to him tonight. now, stop crying”

jinseoul and ae-cha nod their heads before wiping their tears away. you press a kiss to both of their heads of promise them that everything between you and jungkook will be okay. you’re upset at him, deeply upset but for the sake of your children, you will work through this.

after consoling your children, you find yourself going to the garden to clear your mind a bit and to your surprise, there’s jungkook sitting down with his long, fluffy locks of hair blowing in the wind.

it must be a sign that you should talk about it right now instead of holding if off for later on. you let out a sigh and slowly stalk closer to jungkook and the closer you get to him, you hear crying. his crying.

once you’re close enough, you take a seat next to him and lean your head on his shoulder.

“i think i’m ready to talk now” you say. you don’t give time for jungkook to respond, you just let it out. how you’ve been feeling, what you’re thinking, everything.

he’s always wanted to know what goes on in that head of yours anyways and so here it is, you just hope he won’t hate you afterwards.

“i’m upset at you but it’s not just you. i’m happy our son made it out alive, i really am but what you told me that day made me feel so..it made me want to scream at you because you were actually going to leave me with six kids, a kingdom i don’t know the first thing about, and ae-cha who would need her father to help her. i get it, he’s our first born. he’s the reason why he has six other siblings but we’re blessed to have more than one child. if you don’t want to push through for me, that’s fine but please try for our kids because they are the ones who need you the most and it’s like you completely abandoned that. i’m also upset at myself because i feel like i could’ve intervened and had i paid more attention, then i could’ve stopped nami and jinseoul for meeting or i could’ve found out more about the girl. i’m just upset about everything, okay? i’m upset at you, i’m upset at jinseoul, but i’m mostly upset at me because i failed him…i failed as a mother and i’ve been beating myself up about it almost everyday because i feel like a failure. your turn, tell me how you feel about everything. are you mad? are you upset? disappointed? tell me, just vent it out”

~🫧

He cannot believe that you’re here with your head on his shoulder and you are actually talking to him, Jungkook immediately starts to sniffle. he’s been crying for the past six minutes or so and his tears won’t stop. He feels like a child over again.

He feels like the child who used to cry whenever his mother had to go somewhere, and he would cry uncontrollably, and he remembers how much his father hated when he did that.

Jungkook doesn’t want you to go, so please just forgive him and don’t leave him, your silence is the worst punishment than you leaving him. He likes it when you’re chirpy and you’re always talking.

“Y-Yn I’m sorry that I always make you sad, but- my father always taught me to protect what is mine and kill anyone that gets in the way of that- he taught me how to kill yn. It’s all I know from him.” Jungkook sighs after he sniffles. “ I couldn’t bear the loss of our son… he was the reason you started loving me. I was so happy the day he was born… when I saw him like that? I just wanted to kill myself right there.” He isn’t looking into your eyes because he feels so guilty and so ashamed.

He is a 42 year old man who is happily married with seven kids, but who is too immature. Seriously who would want to be with him? His daddy issues, and mommy issues are very severe.

How do you put up with him?

“I…. React to things and in a drastic way you know that.” He scoffs at his own self, because he’s exhausted by himself too. “ I thought of everything bad I did in that moment and I thought that he was dead because of me so I just thought I would be bad or dead so the rest of my children won’t have to face my karma for the things that I did not them.”

You are listening to him without interrupting, you are so kind to him. “ I love you so much, and I love our children so much, and I feel guilty for killing that girl, even though she deserved to die, but when I saw the Look in jinseouls eyes I felt like I fucked up..” that is heavy on his heart too.

“I… I have made a decision yn..” jungkook closes his eyes and wipes his tears, taking a moment to breathe, because it’s hard for him to get the next words out.

He feels like he’s choking.

“I-If you want to leave me, I won’t stop you.. I swear I’ll divorce you if you want.. I know that’s not in customs, but fuck the customs. You deserve to be happy and if you’re happy without me… I’m happy that you’re happy at the end of the day.”

And there, he goes all silent now.

[s1rcus]

The Future Generations [1/?]

Rating: Mature

Words:  1942

Fandoms: Overwatch

Relationships: Moira O'Deorain/Angela "Mercy" Ziegler

Characters: Moira O'Deorain, Angela "Mercy" Ziegler

Additional tags: Trans Angela "Mercy" Ziegler, Pre-Fall of Overwatch, Kid Fic, Eventual Sex, Fake Science, POV Moira O'Deorain

Summary: Angela comes to Moira with an interesting proposal one late evening which makes the two start working closely together in secret.

Story below the cut or in AO3 here

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It was well past 8pm when there was a knock on the lab door. A quick glance at the clock told her it was closer to 9pm already. 20:48 to be exact. Normally Moira would dismiss whoever it was (if it was something important they'd just let themselves in) but with how late it was she was interested to see who it was and what they wanted. So she got up from the table she was working at, stretching a little after multiple hours of sitting as she made her way towards the door. Opening the door she found that behind it stood a slightly nervous looking Doctor Ziegler. And before Moira could even get a word out of her mouth, she was pushing past her into her lab.

"Good, you're still here. I need your help with something," Ziegler just said.

"You and I both know, only we're crazy enough to work past office hours. What do you want? It better be important, I'm working." Moira answered. She pushed down her irritation towards Ziegler coming into her space without consent. Her curiosity of the situation taking over.

"I want to have a baby," Angela stated once the door had clicked shut.

Moira couldn't have heard her right, right? A baby? 

"Now?" Was what her brain decided to say to the surprising sentence. 

"I'm almost thirty. Now is the best time."

Alright, and that had to do with her, how exactly?

"You said you wanted my help? I can't see how I can be of any help in the matter. You do know how biology works, right? I'm not actually an expert in all of it, being gay and all that, but I'm sure you can figure it out. Just go find yourself some nice lad or however you want to do it," she said. Assuming this was just a friendly chat to help her to get to a right decision Moira went back to her work. It happened occasionally, Ziegler coming to her to vent and get to a decision in one thing or another. They weren't exactly friends (Moira was actually pretty sure Ziegler didn't even like her), so Moira wasn't sure why she came to her. Maybe she wanted someone on the same intellectual level as her to bounce ideas off of.

"It's not as simple as finding the perfect donor, Moira!" Angela snapped and broke Moira's train of thought. She took a deep breath and made her way to the sofa Moira had in her lab and sat down. Stunned by the sudden outburst, Moira followed suit.

Angela nervously wrung her hands on her lap, before looking straight ahead of herself and then around the lab. She didn't look at Moira at all, who was trying to get any type of read on the other woman.

"I was hoping to work with you. Off the books", Angela quickly added glancing at Moira, "to build a functioning uterus. I know there are already ones that work just fine, but I need something you can put inside a person. Something that lets them feel like any other pregnant woman."

Okay, that did sound a little more like her field. Now she was just confused why would Angela need such a thing. Angela. Why was she suddenly on a first name basis here?

"I hope I'm not crossing a line here, but just to know what I might be getting myself into. Why exactly would you need that?"

Angela shifted sideways on the sofa, bending one leg underneath herself, to look at her and suddenly all of it started to feel more personal and intimate. Before she started to speak though she turned her gaze to somewhere behind Moira's back. Probably to the cage that had her lab bunnies.

"No, it's fine. It's, um, it's because I don't have one. I'm trans," was Angela's answer, "No-one in Overwatch knows. Well apart from Ana, I don't think she's even told the rest of the commanders, and Torbjörn since he's known me since I was born. And well, now you."

That had to be one of the most surprising news to her. Moira was quiet for a while, mulling the proposal quietly in her head. Angela shifted awkwardly on the sofa next to her. 

"Alright," she said eventually, "but you do know that not being able to get pregnant doesn't make you any less of a woman, right?"

"Of course I know that. This is just something I've always wanted."

"Okay, just making sure. You're going to need an egg from someone though. I don't think we can manage this without that."

"Yes, about that. I was hoping you'd be up for donating?" Angela said cautiously. Moira stared at Angela in disbelief. "Just genetically you're a very good choice."

That Moira had to agree with. She definitely had won the genetics lottery, even with her heterochromia or well especially because of it. She'd been quiet for too long it seems as Angela started to ramble on.

"It's fine if you don't want to! But don't you have the urge to continue your family line, to reproduce? That was probably a poor choice of words, sorry. I'm uh, I'm more than willing to handle it however you want to, but of course having you in the baby's life would be preferable."

"I haven't really thought about it," she answered honestly, trying (and succeeding) to get Angela to close her mouth for a bit. Angela looked a little skeptical. 

"You do know you're already 40, right?"

"Of course. What does that have to do with anything?" She looks at Angela quizzically. Angela just gives her a deadpan look. Smirking, she continues, "I know, I know. I just… umm… Personally, I never wanted to go through it all and never settled down with anyone long enough for them to ask if I wanted children. I'll think about it, alright? We can start working on this. I'll give you an answer eventually. And if it's a no, then you can look for someone else."

Angela smiled brightly at her. Then she got up and Moira walked with her to the door to lock it after she left. Before Angela left though, she turned around to press a kiss to Moira's cheek.

"Thank you so much!" And with that she left.

Moira lifted up a hand to her cheek and used the other to lock the door. Today had to be the strangest day of her life. Turning around she realized she wouldn't be able to focus on work for today. She'll just clean up and go home. Possibly try and dig up some information on external uteruses to get a headstart with this.

As Moira cleaned up around the lab, Angela's question played in her head. Did she want children? She loved her nieces and nephews dearly. But children of her own, that she was unsure of. Of course her mother was always asking when she'd be having children and none of Moira's excuses (being gay, her work, not being in a stable relationship, anything she could use) had never been enough to get her to stop. Moira couldn't even understand why she wanted so many grandchildren. Wasn't 5 enough? Sure some of them were already in their 20s and they'd be having children of their own soon enough. But that meant there was no reason for her mother to want her to have children. Not that she'd do this just to please her mother. It all roots down just to what she wants.

What does she want? A child with Angela would definitely be gorgeous and smart. Both of them were genetically well off. Could Moira actually fulfill her role as a mother? Probably not as well as Angela. Angela was as motherly as they come and Moira was not. She could love a child with no expectations and that was the most important thing. She had had a good childhood. She loved her parents and was loved by them. So she could most likely be a decent mother, but did Angela really want her to be a mother to this possible child? And if so, how would they do it? Split parenthood, like most kids after their parents split up, or was there another way? (The idea of her having an actual nuclear family with Angela was a fleeting thought she tried to get rid of.)

All this thinking just brought up more questions but no answers. Though she was leaning towards yes, yes she would give Angela an egg to have a child. But she was unsure how deeply she'd want to get into all of it. 

Did she want to be a mother? That was the question she kept asking herself as she went to sleep that night.

----------

They started to work on the uterus after work hours. It took them weeks of studying some out of body uteruses hospitals use when an incubator wasn't an option and occasionally with infertility issues to just get an idea how to do it. But they do get an idea for one, and in the upcoming weeks they actually build one on a smaller scale. Next up are the trials they do with some rabbits. The first one is a bust, and so is the next one. Months go by and suddenly there's a light of hope. It's after this discovery Moira talks to Angela of her decision.

"I've decided to give you the egg but I'm not sure how much I actually want to be involved. I guess that'll be something I'll figure out eventually. I technically have 4 years to decide," she says while Angela marvels over the rabbit ultrasound.

Angela immediately disregards the rabbit, turning around to face Moira with the brightest smile on her face. Moira's heart does something funny and the thought of building a family with Angela peeks it’s head again.

"Thank you! I'm sure you'll know what part you want to play soon enough. And if you want to just vent all of it out to someone, I'm here, I'll listen. And I'll answer any questions you have, I just want you to be comfortable."

Moira just grunts something at that, not knowing what to say.

----------

It still takes them months of tests and trials but they end up with a healthy litter of 8 kittens. Couple more months go by as they test the kittens to see if there was any type of harm from what they'd been through but it seems like this uterus works just like it's supposed to, at least in this scale. 

They move to a bigger scale with a pig embryo this time in an incubator. Moira has to stop Angela from getting them an actual lab pig. She apparently really likes them for whatever reason. When she asks she gets an answer of the Lindholms having them at their farm but Angela won't give further explanation. Clearly the Lindholms have other animals as well, if the youngest of them is anything to go off of. Moira doesn't know them that well but she's certain she's heard that one talk about cats on multiple occasions.

Couple more months and it seems clear that their design works. Yet Moira is still hesitant, when Angela comes to her stating that it's ready and that she's ready as well. Ironic, Moira knows this, that she's the one pressing brakes and Angela is ready to move forward. But Moira begs her to make a couple more tests and tryouts. Moira never begs, which is probably why Angela agrees. Moira can't be anything but happy with it.

[the-enby-bird]

I see you reblogged an ask thingy, so if you're up to answering (I know I'm including a lot, feel free to only answer a few), I shall ask:

"🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?"

"🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?"

"✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉"

"🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?"

"🙋‍♀️ Do any irl people know you write fanfic?"

"🌞 Do you have a preferred time of day to write?"

"💖 What made you start writing?"

"❌ What's a trope you will never write?"

"🎯 Have any of your readers accurately guessed major plot points? Care to share which?"

"🤗 What advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?"

"💞 Who's your comfort character[s]?"

"🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them."

"😬 Which of your fics would you be most horrified for friends, family, or coworkers to stumble upon?"

"📚 Would you ever want to turn writing into a career?"

Forgot I reblogged this post lmao

Sorry this took so long I never got the notification for this

~~~

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

That moment when a character who's trying to be strong and confident, or convince others that they're okay, loses the ability to do that. It's not something that shows up a lot in my published work, more in the top secret angst fics/drabbles, so, but it's always jdladhlshflsjf to read and right, y'know? Also when a character just fucking collapses for any reason and the other one just,,,, picks em up in a bridal carry and is just over there like,,,,, "you're okay babe" and I. *Sob bing*

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

So it's a really old scene, and it only made me laugh cause I was kinda high on anesthetic, but there's this one scene in the old version of Destined that has,,,, Horror and somebody else? Joking around with Cross as a form of comfort, I thought it was funny at the time. Looking back it's kind of. Um. Cringy, for lack of a better word, but in my defense I was 13

✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

Um. So this is really something that shows up in my shorter fics, the ones that I don't publish, (generally cause they're vent fics lmao) but sometimes my writing is like,,, really poetic, and I think it's nice. Also, just. For someone my age, and who's been writing as long as I have, I'm. Not terrible. I've improved, and I love that.

🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

I listen to music 24/7 and the song that's on repeat really depends on my current mood and interest-- there's not really any right now that I can think of, but I'm sure my poor Spotify has things to say about my constant listening to Poor Man's Poison

🙋‍♀️ Do any irl people know you write fanfic?

Yeah, a ton of people! Just none of them write Undertale, or at least not the same kind of Undertale, as I. Their writing is fabulous anyways, and it's nice to have people irl who I don't need to fear judgement from! <3

🌞 Do you have a preferred time of day to write?

I love writing late at night, and frankly inspiration oft fails to flow when it's not night. However, since school generally stops me from writing late at night- I need my beauty sleep- I also enjoy evenings and early mornings.

💖 What made you start writing?

Frankly, I haven't the slightest! That was so long ago that I have no clue anymore. My guess is it was a combination of my childhood love of reading and my overactive imagination; and a desire to put my thoughts somewhere solid. I've been "writing" since I was a toddler, but I truly got into it when I was 11/12. Far too long for me to remember.

❌ What's a trope you will never write?

I don't much like enemies to lovers, but not enough to never ever write it. So, I guess there's not too many? To be honest, I don't really feel like I've explored different genres and tropes enough to give this one an answer.

🎯 Have any of your readers accurately guessed major plot points? Care to share which?

Not that I remember? I'm usually not much for long fics or heavy foreshadowing so they haven't had many chances.

🤗 What advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

Just keep writing. But- don't force yourself to write something if it's not making you happy to write. Most importantly: just keep going. It doesn't matter if it's good, or if it takes you months to write 100 words-- just keep going. If it's something that makes you happy, it doesn't matter if it's good. It just needs to be. Go tell your stories, babes, anyone who judges you is just a dick and not worth listening to anyways <3

💞 Who's your comfort character[s]?

Ough this list is so long. Um. Horror, Cross, Dust, Blue, Swap Papyrus, Fell Papyrus, Toriel, Dream and NM, my little oc Ash who I never talk about cause they're just a lump of self indulgent bs, and Lust

There's more but I'm too lazy to list em all

😬 Which of your fics would you be most horrified for friends, family, or coworkers to stumble upon?

All of em? Mostly the older ones, but honestly I think I'd have an easier time listing which ones I wouldn't be too horrified about. (There's like. 3)

📚 Would you ever want to turn writing into a career?

Nah, it's just not my vibe. It's. Hard to explain, and there's a lot of reasons, but it can all just be summarized in no.

My dream careers rn are as a psychiatrist, psychologist, therapist, baker or veterinarian!

[milkbull]

Ghost needs more friends!

--

Ghost is a type of few words, he does not like to interact with people and prefers solitude before being comfortable with many people, he usually thinks in silence and isolation, maybe he needs a friendship to vent a little.

He was sitting on the roof somewhere in the base, it was night about 2 am most should already be asleep, but not, his sleep problems prevent all that and makes him think until the sun starts to appear on the horizon, so he usually goes out for a walk oh sit around to think.

"What are you doing here?..." a soft and curious voice appears behind him, right on the stairs to reach the ceiling, it was Rudy who poked his head, had found him, although he was awake too?

"... Nothing just... He couldn't sleep..." he said without looking at him or turning around.

"Can I accompany you?" he said without waiting for the other to respond and finished climbing up to sit on the side." it's cold, isn't it?" he says settling down a little while looking at the horizon.

"Yes," he said in short, he was a man of very few words, very few so being sharp didn't cause him anything in himself. "why can't you sleep?" he said without looking at the smallest man.

"Oh...umn... "Nervously in her voice, playing with her hands, ghost knew it wasn't just that.

"Tell the truth, rodolfo," he spat rudely, but not with disturbing insinuation.

The youngest is startled and after a long silence, he releases a heavy enough sigh to look at his lap. "I... I alone... from hassan and the... Fire, he had nightmares and... Many paranoid thoughts about it, you know it's strange... I am a soldier... death was supposed to be assured at any moment, but it would burn in one's own life... I was going to die slowly if ale didn't get me out of there... I was going to die in a horrible way..." "I could have died alone." And "his voice went no further and his eyes were glazed, his hands trembled slightly and it was not for the cold. "oh god... Sorry s-"

"Hey, calm Rudy..." the shortest calmed down and surprised when the oldest man spoke to you sensitive and soft for the first time" it's ok now, rodolfo, you did not die you are invited, you are with us... And alejandro "put a hand on the shoulder of the latino to comfort him a little are to get so much physical contact.

Rodolfo was looking at him, blushing when he named Alejandro, giving him a small muted smile, while with the sleeves of his sweater, which graciously reached the middle of his palm, he wiped away the small tears that came out of his faceWith ghost he felt good, comfortable at this moment which he did not think could happen as the man made him a little afraid until horita.

"Thank you ghost..." he thanked in a soft voice and straightened up a little, perhaps the calabrian man was not as bad as he thought at first" and you... What kept you awake?" he asks, having only an uncomfortable silence as an answer. "hey ghost, brother... Can you tell me what happens I promise not to tell anyone is okay? You just helped me, it's my turn..."

Ghost looked him in the eye and hesitated for a moment, but he recovered after he could see the confidence in the eyes of the other man; If he could tell her what was happening, he too...

"It's post-traumatic stress..."

"What?" Rodolfo looked at him confused.

"I have post-traumatic stress, that prevents me from sleeping, I usually have nightmares"

Rodolfo looked at him with eyes of concern and compassion "oh... I'm sorry, "he said.

"Don't worry," he said, righting himself, "it was a long time ago when all that happened... Although it lasted a long time and now... I'm fine... I suppose... "Ghost was not going to say everything he lived, he was not yet ready to tell everything in detail, he only made mention of small things, the day he is ready he will not tell it for now and rodolfo really agrees, so he just put his hand on ghost's, which was resting on the thighs of this fist shape, the bigger man jumped over and looked at Rudy, who gave him an encouraging look.

"Quiet ghost, I know you are going to overcome it and when you are ready, you can be free" with a compassionate tone I looked at him and the bigger one relaxed, at that moment he decided to change the subject because the aura was feeling heavy "well... You're really not as bad as I thought you would be."

"Did you think it was bad?" astonished

"You give fear with that mask"

"That's the purpose rudolph..." he said with obvious, turning his eyes blank.

"I know, I know"

"It's not my fault that you're a scary rat," he replied suddenly as a smile will form on his face.

Rodolfo turned his eyes blank "oh, eres una verga!"

Ghost releases a little laugh, he seems to have found a new friend whom to look for star and to be able to express himself more, perhaps rodolfo and he can share a little more...

-

a little fanfic I had in mind, ghost is a fool that if they don't talk to him they don't talk to him, I decided to put to Rudy why I feel that they would be very good friends, between shy people understand supposed, we would be that it's all a big brother and little brother relationship, that's how I like to see them, besides friends also hold hands and talk about feelings.

I like the feelings - I'm sorry.

[daisyvisions]

Deep personal feelings ahead, you can skip if you want. Just needed to vent it out a little

idk where else to say this but the existential crisis I'm going through is so bad right now. the constant feeling that I have to put in double the amount of effort to be recognized for the things I do (and they don't have to be big things okay) and at the same time the struggle of trying to only talk when I should because my reactions / opinions throw people off

I've tried to do as much as I can but now im just resulting into taking extreme measures aka just going back to my own bubble and just not talking as much. im pretty sure my problems aren't that bad from a 3rd pov but damn I'm tearing up just thinking about it 😞

like yeah I'm highly self aware that certain reactions or comments of mine are too much, but why is it that when others around me get to "be themselves" they're not called out for it but I am? tbh this feeling has always been a problem, I guess this time around it hit me a little too hard.

ANWYAYS whoever reads this you don't have to say anything if you don't want to, I just needed a place to let this all out. And if you're struggling with the same thing too just know I'm here for you!

Gonna use this time to reflect more and how I can improve and ofc, write more because seriously writing had brought me nothing but comfort and is truly my form of escapism

im not really the type to share my burdens with others because I always feel like im bothering them but I guess right now I just need it to be somewhere,

[busterheadspace]

Staring My Bad Things Happen Bingo.

I wanna start my Bingo and since we need some fic, request, put a character, the prompt, and how you would like it to go (this one is optional) —-

Left alone to deal with the missiles heading to Washington, Reagan makes a fatal error that leads in the coding that leaves her trapped in a burning building.

Bad Luck Bingo Prompt:Trapped In A Burning Building

—-

Out of all times to abandon her, this was the worst one. The room flashed red as Reagan typed on her laptop as quickly as she could. The big screen screamed “MISSILES INCOMING” with loud beeping that was almost deafening to her ears.

JR had sent The Gang to a building where all the Government Weapons were stored. The building was in the middle of nowhere, miles away from any cities or homes. It was very tall, the only thing surrounding it was a metal fence with barbed wires. Everyone who apparently worked in the building got radiation poisoning from which entered the vents and to the air. Now they were all hospitalized until further notice.

The reason why The Gang were here was just to monitor any attacks or make sure no one hacks their way into getting the weapons. It was on the 5th floor, the middle of the building. Everything was going alright. The Gang just talked and chilled, although a little bored with nothing happening. She was just doing paperwork the whole time where suddenly she heard the alarms. Her head shot up as the warning showed. Two small missiles were shot from somewhere in Asia and were heading toward America, specifically Washington DC. Reagan turned around, freaked out expecting her teams behind to help but they were gone. Only a little Post It Note saying they went to Quinzos for lunch

“How hard is it to hack a freaking missile!” Reagan yelled at herself as she furiously typed. It’s been an hour since it launched and she had to change to somewhere else, or possibly WW3 would start. Her head felt like it was going to explode with the beeping getting louder and quickly. Panic almost overtook her but she continued to stay calm and finally gained control.

The first missile was sent to the ocean, away from Atlantis of course. However the second missile, the coordinates were set wrong. Her hand accidentally tapped on a key and the coordinates changed… to the building she was sitting

“Oh shit.” Reagan tried to get back in but changing the coordinate seemed to have been permanent, not allowing her in. Reagan realized that she shouldn’t be sitting on the 5th floor of a building with a missile coming. She had to get out.

She stood up immediately however the floor shakes and she stumbled onto the floor. A loud noise, like a firecracker, was coming closer and closer as she gets up and falls again

“No no no! Stop! Stop!” Reagan yelled as if it was going to do anything.

The missile hits the building and Reagan feels a blast of very hot heat and the floor collapsing under her. She screamed before she hits the ground and everything turns dark —- “Mmm. Quiznos.” Andre said between bites of his sandwich. No one answered as they were eating their sandwich and snacks they bought from the store. Gigi was driving the van back to the Government Building, Brett in the passenger seat messing with the plastic bag.

“Are you sure it was okay to leave for lunch?” Brett asked.

“Yes honey. How many times do I have to tell you? It’s an hour drive between the building and wherever business is. Beside we got her food too, nothing is going to happe-“

Just as Gigi was about to finish her sentence, they heard a loud crash up ahead. They felt ground shakes and a sudden smell of smoke

“What the hell was that..?” Myc asked.

“Sounded… like a.. missile of some sort” Glenn mumbled, thinking about his time in war. Everyone’s eyes widen and Gigi pushes on the gas pedal, driving as quickly to the building

The building has a large hole on the side in the middle with dark smoke coming. A fire started and the flames were huge coming from the hole.

“Holy shit.” Myc said first. “We are in so much trouble.”

“Yeah.. oh boy, JR is not going to be happy.” Andre replies.

Brett stared at the building for a moment before remembering that, not everyone was out here. His best friend was still in the burning building!

“Reagan’s still in there!” He shouted, grabbing his head. The gang froze for a moment, before Glenn jumps out of the van and runs toward the building.

“ Glenn! What are you doing!” Gigi yelled.

“I’m not letting a companion die in there!” He answered back.

Die? No, no no. Brett wasn’t going to let Reagan die there. He left her there alone despite being on the job. He followed Glenn despite Gigi and Andre’s screaming for them to come back.

“What if you die! What if she’s dead already!”

The first floor was full of smoke. Very thick smoke. It stained Brett’s face and outfit. He looked at Glenn as the hybrid looked at the layout of the building that wasn’t burnt away yet.

“We need to take that hallway, a right and then that’s where we’ll find the stairs. Come on soldier!” Glenn grumbled. Brett nods and takes off to where Glenn had pointed. He wasn’t going to let his best friend die. He wasn’t going to let his Reagan die like this. —- It hurts.

That was the first thought as Reagan gained consciousness. Her eyes didn’t open yet but she tried to move. Everything hurts and she holds back a groan. Something was on top of her and it was too heavy for her weak body to move it away. Taking a deep breath to calm herself down, she only inhales the nasty carbon that makes her cough. That’s when her eyes finally opened and she could see what was happening.

She remembers what happened.. the missle. It hitted the building and now she was stuck under the building rubble with fire all around her.

She had to get out of here. Her arm moves, albeit in a lot of pain and she sees the damage. It’s raw, and bleeding and trying to push the concrete wall on top of her made it impossible. She stopped after a minute after another coughing fit hit her. The air quality was horrible from the fire, it made her lungs ache and her head spin.

This couldn’t be the way Reagan died. Alone in a burning building because her team decided to abandon her for stupid sandwiches.. it wasn’t a happy image for the scientist and it made her heart ache. She was about to close her eyes, just to get away, when she heard.. yelling.

“Reagan! Reagan!” The familiar voice of Brett. She tried to shout.. but she ended up coughing harshly. It seemed to have caught his attention as she could faintly hear footsteps. Glenn was apparently with him as he bent down.

“I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” Brett asked. She wanted to respond but even trying to muster a word took so much energy out of her.

“She’s not Brett! Help me move this before we die from the carbon!” Glenn shouted, pulling a large piece of concrete off her body. Brett gives her a quick smile before helping out the veteran. Reagan wanted him to stay next to her but they had to get out of here and she couldn’t do much.

Kicking and throwing pieces away, they finally get it all off her. Reagan forced herself to move but she whimpered. Holy shit it felt worse now that everything was off. Brett was already by her side and picking her up in his arms.

“Crap.Those do not look good.” He mumbled nervously as her gray shirt and pants were turned, showing rough bleeding burns and cuts.

“Worry about that later. Let’s get out of here before the fire gets us.” Glenn mumbled, already moving.

“Okay.. Reagan, just try to stay awake until Andre checks you, okay?” Brett said.

She wanted to say something or even nod but it was too much. Just as they were running down the stairs, Reagan felt the darkness coming back and taking her away from the pain. — “There. That should help her.”

Brett sighed with relief as the mini ventilator was put on Reagan. The woman was still passed out in his arms as they were driving back to Cognito. Myc was the one sitting in the passenger seat while he held Reagan tightly in his arms. He wasn’t going to leave her alone like this, bandaged and bloody

Half an hour later, Reagan stirred with a pain groaned. The first thing she saw was Brett’s smile.

“How do you feel?” He asked.

“Like shit..” Reagan replies bitterly.

“We’re going to get you to the medical department once we get back to Cognito.” Andre added on. However Reagan glared at him, and everyone else in the van.

“You guys., left me..” She mumbled angrily. “When I needed you guys the most.. you just disappeared.. and...I almost just died in there”

Her eyes were full of pain as she thought about almost panicking in the weapon’s room. The heat from it. Waking up in so much pain that she couldn’t move. It was stupid that she was upset by this.

“We’re not leaving you again.” Brett reassured her, grabbing her bandage hand. “Right guys?”

In union, their coworkers sigh.

“Yeah. We’ll be smarter about our breaks.” Gigi said. “We’re don’t want a dead body on our hands,”

Reagan snickered, wincing as movement hurt. Brett noticed and ran a hand through her hair. It relaxed her immediately, her body sinking into him

“Get some rest. We’ll wake you up once we’re back.”

“You better do..” Reagan mumbled before passing out once more.

[luckyfailuregirl]

Sorry I know this is a bit of a different post for me but I need a place to put my thoughts (Vent below, tw suicide mention)

I just don't know if I can really do this anymore, I'm just so tired. I feel like even when I'm typing this out now, I won't properly be able to explain what I'm feeling, but it's better to say something than nothing.

I feel like a fucking faker every time I try to confront this

But the days feel so hazy everything is so fuzzy and I don't even know where this came from

I almost cried like 10 different times today in school. And it's not like anything is too difficult for me it's just so overwhelming

My heart starts feeling really heavy and I can't breathe

I embarassed myself really bad today and I feel like a failure

In second hour we had this debate tournament and I got to the top 5 people left and we ran out of time, so then my teacher had to pick winners last minute

I was kind of confident when I first went into it, and I've debated well before, but I was just shaking so bad this time. I feel like that's what ruined my point

The teacher picked two other people to win over me

Which is inherently fine, but I felt like a let down. I felt stupid. I felt like a fucking idiot. I made a fool of myself in front of the whole class and I lost. And it feels even sillier because it doesn't even matter to anyone else, my group said I was fine, I'm the only one who wanted to cry over it. I'm the only one being sensitive.

The next hour I asked a really stupid question and to be honest things just went downhill from there

I wanna give up so bad I'm so fucking tired. Everytime I'm in school this year I just wish I was home, and everytime I'm home I just wish I was somewhere else. Nothing feels right. I have nowhere to go. Home doesn't feel like home and it doesn't feel like there's anyone I can really trust because I just keep letting everybody down so why would they put up with me

In gym, my locker jammed. Like twice

Again, a small thing, but small things really tripped me up today

Things just get worse as the week goes on

There's so much to do and none of these words feel right so I just don't feel okay I just don't feel normal I just want this to be over I want to die so bad and be done with this

Nothing's ever been so unclear before

I walk around and it just feels like I'm on auto pilot I just feel really really tired. I can't keep my eyes open really even when I do get the exact same amount of sleep as I had last year (and last year I was perfectly fine, nothing ever got this bad)

And when I'm around people I could possibly trust I just want to cry but I don't because it's stupid so we laugh and I move on

I don't know I don't know what to do I just wish I wasn't so stupid. I wish I wasn't born this way because I know I'm just a burden and I'm troubling everyone

I rely too much on people who I don't confide in because they have life bad enough already and I'm growing more distant with anyone else in my life. I barely text my friend group anymore I just sit in bed and consume endless amounts of media and try not to lose everything I care about

I don't know. Vent over I can't word it right so I give up

[brokenmusicboxwolfe]

Excuse the rambling below. Let it be a warning of the sort of posts that happen if you have no one to tell your day to…

The shopping is done, and I WILL be going to the con! Woo-hoo!

What a day, though.

Before I even got out of bed I had gotten myself locked out of my bank account. I hadn’t been awake, and had a headache, so maybe that’s why I typed my password wrong three damn times! So now I had to call them, only they don’t let you until after 8am and I’d gotten up extra early to try to get the shopping done before the rain.

Getting out of bed I knocked the machete off where I keep it. It used to be on the bookcase by my bed, but when I moved that it ended up on the storage container of clothes. And it quickly became a comedy routine with the risk of getting cut…

What? You are hung up wondering why I have a machete next to my bed? Well, it had to go somewhere! It’s kinda funny, but my family tends to have potentially “deadly weapons” within reach, but only kinda accidentally. Like, they are tools, especially something like machetes, and we stuff them wherever we have a space and won’t get lost. Not getting lost is the trick. You wouldn’t believe the things we find in between strata of our book mountains!

Anyway, I knocked it off, set it on the corner if the container but didn’t get the belt and rope attached to it on the container, and down it went again. I picked it up again, but by the sheath, and tiled. Out fell the blade. I tried to but the machete back in the sheath and had it the wrong way so it wouldn’t fit. I wale up enough to realize what I’m doing wrong, get it right, and set it back where it goes. Satisfied I start to walk off, only the end of the rope was around my foot and down it went again!

On with the morning where it was one thing after another, until I could call the bank.

Only THAT turned out to be a problem too. Some of the time the phone didn’t work. Sometimes they didn’t have the info at hand. “Account PIN”? i have my debit card PIN, but it’s not the same, and the automated voice (why did I have to wait until after 8 for an automated voice?) keeps saying “I’m sorry, we are having trouble verifying your account while I hunt for anything where it might be written. Or my account number, since who has that memorized?? I called six times before I got it so I could reset my password. And we all know I am going to put in the old password next time.

Then it’s looking at the bank account and going “YIKES, where did all those charges come from!?” Oh, it all made sense. The dog medicine. The kettle to replace the one that broke (we had that old one as long as I can remember**sniff**) The ant poison. But it took time.

Time. A crowded gas station. Lines in stores of people preparing for the storm. Repair work at a store that required me to walk to the other end of the store from where I parked. People that were super chatty…

Speaking of chatty, a woman working in Walmart got talking to me. She was telling me the trouble the storm will be for her. Her road floods all the time, and that could end up getting her fired if this storm is bad. She told me all the ins and outs of working at Walmart, how the laws in NC make things even worse for employees, that sort of thing. I felt for her. Companies don’t need to care about the folks barely, or not at all, making a living wage because there are always the desperate waiting to take their place. Hell, if my ankle could take the standing for hours retail in the US demands, it might me.

Recently someone was venting to me about a person they had been paying to help them work on a house, and then suddenly they said, “hey, can you paint?” Sure, I can paint walls! I’ve done it before. She says she’ll get me to help her and even pay me to do it. Okay, I’d lend a hand for free, but I can use the money so “Yes!”. Then they didn’t ask me. Because there is always someone else eager to be paid.

You’d be amazed how well I saved money, the things I didn’t buy. Oddly this month being meatless is bugging me less than not getting any nuts. Dang it, I’ve craved some nicely salty nuts for so long. I promised myself at least some store brand peanuts, but $3 is $3 I’ll be glad of later….

And then a Dollar Tree I bought a book! LOL I didn’t intend to, but I can’t stop myself from browsing books. They hardly have any so it only takes a few seconds. It isn’t even my sort of book, but I noticed a “signed copy” sticker on the cover. It’s only $1.25 and when am I going to stumble on signed copies of anything when I can’t even go to bookstores?

So, I can skip food and not books. Typical! LOL

UGH! My period started in the middle of shopping. So now I was stressing about blood, but at least it meant my headache was finally gone.

I only had to get the hog food and kerosene and….It poured!! If I hadn’t had to waste time with the bank stuff I would have gotten done before the rain hit. I got the stuff though. I held and umbrella over the kerosene cans while I pumped. The dang pump is always sooooo slowwww, which normally is irritating but this time made the risk of getting water in the kerosene worse. I did well to keep the cans dry while I hunched there with water cascading off me.

There was FINALLY a break in the rain…after I’d driven home and completely unloaded the car.

BTW, having the fridge on the back porch is only mildly annoying most of the time, but when it’s raining heavily and all the cats have taken shelter there, and you are trying to out away a groceries….VERY annoying! Guys, you won’t even want to eat most of this!!!

Of course, you can never tell with cats. Nony adores peanut butter. I used to have a cat, Fizzgig, who would devour popcorn (and not even buttered!) But no, darlin’, I am not sharing this….

Until I do. (See Nony…I swear he pulls a Puss in Boots on me all the time!)

While I was gone UPS had left my package. In the rain. On the ground. Where I park the car. GEEZ! It was the replacement kettle, so it couldn’t be hurt, but the delivery person didn’t know that!!

And then I did normal (by my standards) stuff. But I’ve already written too much and..

**poke**

You still awake???

Okay, well, all that was my losing track of what I was writing. I could have just said “I did the math and, barring some unforeseen disaster in the next few days, I get to go to the con!”

Which, I already did in the first sentence! LOL

[noa-de-cajou]

Okay so a vent because I really need to put this somewhere out there

My partner feels like shit for reasons completely outside my control

And instead of feeling genuine compassion and wanting to help it just makes me feel vaguely annoyed because I am not in the right headspace for emotional labor or any type of emotional crisis handling right now

But I also feel terrible about feeling that way because I don't want to think of my partner and her problems as another event that needs scheduling but there's no room for me to be helpful and present and I hate it

It's like this nearly every monday and I have no graceful way of handling these kind of things ever

And it feels like I want to help her purely so I can feel alright which sucks

I'm also super fucking nervous about her hurting herself or having a panic attack or worse

I guess I just wish I was better at this. Whatever "this" means.

[lemonstrashcan]

INTRO POST!

heya, the names lemon, and welcome to my tumblr!

there isn't very much here (yet), but i hope you'll stick around!

here's a list of some of my posts (still under construction!)

MY ART (tbh it's mainly doodles)

WRITING (or writing related)

wip: luminous

governent mandated chaos tag

about me 𓆝 ⋆｡𖦹°‧🫧

☆ ive reached upperclassmen status, wahoo!

☆ african-american (and starting to deep dive into aa history :])

☆ im a trans demiguy :]

☆ my main thing is to be a theatre tech (which is what I'm doing after school rn!), but im also working on/delevoping a webcomic, so you'll probably see many of my ocs here as well! im also interested in becoming a librarian so theres that as well lol

☆ cat person

☆ im litterally OBSESSED with amphibia. idc if it's been 2 years okay 😭😭 i miss themmm

before you follow, please keep in mind the following:

* as stated above, i am a minor. even if you are too, please keep that in mind before commenting or dming me something really inappropriate or really graphic. if it's not a lighthearted joke, i don't really wanna know tbh.

* as my user suggests, this is basically just a place for me to put my thoughts and ideas, as well as art and stuff. in other words this is also a personal blog as well as an art one!

*some of my posts are vents!! nothing is super bad but I kinda just have to get it out somewhere yk? SO im trying to get into the habit of putting tws before if you don't want to see it/if the topic may be triggering!

*i make typos a lot, usually in my text posts because i have a habit of typing fast (especially in posts that i make at night lol). if you see anything that needs to be corrected please let me know!!

dni if..

* generally hateful towards a specific group if people. i don't have to list our each thing because you know EXACTLY about the "ism"s and "phobics" im talking about. if your hating on/targeting a specific group of people, i don't want you here, plain and simple.

*following a similar thing, i want this blog to be a safe space! so please don't bring a bunch of toxicity here! thanks in advance!