#okay i don’t actually know if ive messed up but i Think i did

[starstruckodysseys]

i loveeee writing one thousand entire words of a segment and then realizing it doesn’t go in canon where i thought it did and then having to write an entirely different segment first… yippee…

[kookslastbutton]

Guilty Pleasures ༓ jjk, kth (m) | chapter iv

✑ Summary: Three years of being Seoul's power couple earns you nothing but a big fat divorce settlement and your face plaster on every gossip column around town. You're angry, hurt, and desperately want to move on, but worst of all? You're still in love with the man who started the whole mess, even though the most he can ever see you as is a friend. The renowned actor you've hired to be your company's new endorser seems to have a soft spot for you though. He's easy on the eyes, you'll admit, but who actually wants a divorcee like yourself? It's unrealistic really.

pairing: ex-husband ceo!jungkook x ceo!reader, actor!taehyung x ceo!reader (not poly)

genre/AU: angst, smut, fluff, loverstoexesto ?, coworkers2?, unrequited love

Word count: 11.3k

Warnings: oc and jk are both 30, Taehyung is 32, swearing, tornado of emotions (you might laugh, you might cry, and you might just wanna punch something after this chapter), morally grey characters, mentions of toxic relationships, mentions of broken home/families, mentions of therapy, struggles of self-blame, regret, guilt, denial, self-deprecation in some aspect, etc., mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of sexism in the media and business world

playlist: Unkiss Me, Apologize, Hate That I Love You, etc.

a/n: So, elephant in the room....how did this get past 11k when other chapters are significantly shorter? Well...I had ideas? I'm sorry!! 🫠 ANYWAY more angst in this chapter. Sorry not sorry for what you will consume here. I honestly love this chapter so much though! Okay, I won't say any more bc spoilers are cool but not in my fic! (hehe) Enjoy! 🥰

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Numb.

It’s the only word you can rummage up to describe the sudden shift in your demeanor. You’d think one’s typical response to their ex-husband’s drunken confession would be one of confusion, anger, hurt, or the like.

But you’ve gone stone cold instead, barely able to feel the steaming hot water that kisses your skin from within the tub. The room seems to have become a bit of a haze too, your vision blurring as you grip your cell phone in your hand.

The absurdity of it all—the man who handed you divorce papers now professing his love—feels like a cruel joke. The sheer impossibility of the situation is almost laughable, yet you can't even bring yourself to do that at this point. You've exhausted all of your emotional resources.

You’re unsure how many seconds pass before his voice calls your name again.

“__? Are you still there?” His voice is a muffled echo in your mind. It sounds so far away, though you know he’s right here on the other end of the line.

"Honestly Jungkook��I don’t know what you expect me to say.”  The words come out slow, measured, and almost emotionless.

There's a pause, and when he speaks again, his voice is hoarse, cracking under the weight of his confession. "I guess—I'm not sure either. But I just needed you to know. I needed to tell you everything."

“You're drunk. You realize that, right?"

“I had a few beers, yeah," he admits. "Maybe I'm a little tipsy. But it doesn’t change the fact that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you lately. I miss you, __, a lot."

The words hang in the air, and for a moment, you’re back in the past, back when those words would have meant the world to you. But now, they feel hollow, devoid of the warmth they once carried. And how can they not? You tethered yourself to your ex-husband for three years, learned his patterns, became acquainted with his needs, and danced with his indifference. In the end, the result is always the same, and this time is no different. By morning, he'll likely forget everything he's ever said to you and return to his normal habits.

You take a deep breath, your head resting on the cool porcelain tub, and close your eyes. "I can’t do this," you say quietly. "Not now."

"It's late. I understand-"

"No," you interrupt, voice firmer, "you don't understand, Jungkook. You don't understand me and you never have. I'm hanging up now."

"Please don't. I know I've hurt-"

"Stop. Do you know how patronizing that sounds to me? Please don't call this number again."

"But... I love you, __," his voice is barely a whisper. "Do you not love me anymore?"

"Goodbye, Jungkook." You end the call before another word can drop from his lips, or yours for that matter. It's time you accept that you are never more than an impulsive decision, a temporary solution, and an item on his agenda. Tonight's conversation solidifies that for you.

Despite being sleep-deprived the next morning, you refuse to let fatigue keep you from fulfilling your promise to visit Taehyung at the hospital. You've been anxious about him all night, tossing and turning without respite. The weight of your ex-husband's drunken confession added to your restlessness as well. Nevertheless, you push it out of your mind as you bound out the front door.

Upon arrival, you are greeted by an abundance of flowers, cards, and thoughtful gifts scattered around Taehyung’s hospital room. One bouquet on the windowsill catches your attention in particular—its familiar scent of lavender is instantly recognizable.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” a voice says from behind you. You turn to see Dr. Min entering the room, Taehyung’s chart in hand. He seems more lively than last night, his expression noticeably brighter with a faint smile on his lips.

“Yes, they’re lovely,” you reply. “I’m guessing these are from Taehyung’s fans and colleagues?”

He nods. “Indeed. Lavender is a calming scent. It’s no wonder people chose it for him.” The corners of his mouth lift slightly before he continues, “My girlfriend loves it too. She says it helps her relax after a long day.”

The comment is unexpected yet sweet. You notice the suppressed grin and the warmth in his eyes easily, signaling his deep affection for her. You wonder how it must feel to love someone so purely and without restraint. Before the thought lingers, your gaze shifts involuntarily to the man on the hospital bed, still asleep. Though the bandages are gone and his breathing is stable, your concern deepens as you take in his nearly still form.

“How’s he doing?” you ask, moving closer to his bed. Your heart tightens with each step as the cuts and burns on his face become more visible.

“He’s lucky,” Dr. Min says, walking to the opposite side of the bed, his tone growing serious. “He has multiple rib fractures, a mild concussion, and a few burns, but it could have been worse. Taehyung is stable now, and we’re monitoring his progress closely.”

“How long will it take for him to heal?”

“His face burns are only second-degree, so they should heal in a couple of weeks. The concussion should also resolve with ample rest and by avoiding strenuous activity—both physical and mental.”

“Which means he won’t be able to act for a while?” you ask, reading between the lines.

“Afraid not,” Dr. Min dismisses the idea. “Hopefully, his projects can accommodate his absence.”

“What about his rib fractures? I imagine those will require the most attention.” You feel like you might be asking too many questions, knowing Dr. Min will likely need to repeat everything to Taehyung later, but you can't hold back. After all, you made a promise to yourself last night that you'd ensure he'd be alright.

“Yes," Dr. Min answers carefully, "they could take up to three months to fully heal. We recommend applying ice for 20 minutes at a time, several times a day. As long as he remains stable over the next few days, he can be discharged to continue his recovery at home." He pauses, allowing you to process the information before continuing. "It's crucial that he rests. Even if he feels bursts of energy, he needs to let his body heal. Light activities like breathing exercises and short walks are fine, but he should avoid intense exercises until we give the all-clear.”

You nod thoughtfully, absorbing Dr. Min’s detailed prognosis. Taehyung’s condition sounds serious but manageable. After such a traumatic accident, it's clear he'll need months to heal. Getting him to adhere to the doctor's orders will be challenging, given his profession and active social calendar. However, if you need to be the one to remind him, you will.

“I’ll make sure he follows your recommendations,” you assure Dr. Min, your voice tinged with concern.

“I have no doubt,” Dr. Min replies with a reassuring smile. “You know, you're the first person who’s shown up for him both last night and today. Aside from that young man who came in briefly. Namjoon, right?”

“Yeah,” you respond slowly, the revelation catching you off guard. “He works as my secretary but he's also a good friend of Taehyung's. His family really hasn’t come in yet?” You circle back to Dr. Min's first point with a sense of urgency.

You wouldn't normally be this insistent on the matter; however, past conversations with Taehyung have revealed how much he cherishes his family, often sharing stories about their reunions with warmth and enthusiasm. With such a loving family, you’re taken aback that they haven’t shown up yet. Then again, his accident was sudden, and there could be various reasons for their delay. Do they even know about his accident, for that matter?

“They called, of course, but you’re the first to actually come in,” Dr. Min clarifies, his gaze thoughtful as he responds to your concern. "You must be quite an attentive boss to show this level of care for your colleague."

There's an underlying suggestiveness laced in his tone, but you're quick to brush it off, redirecting the focus to Taehyung’s condition. “It’s the least I can do, given what he’s going through,” you say, trying to sound matter-of-fact. “He’s a valuable member of our team, and I want to make sure he gets back on his feet as soon as possible.”

Dr. Min's eyes twinkle, as if holding back further commentary. “Even from a professional standpoint, not everyone would go to such lengths for a coworker. He’s fortunate to have you.”

You feel a slight flush as his subtle implications continue. “Well, I just…care about his well-being. Besides,” you glance back at Taehyung, your expression softening more than you intend, “I know he'd do the same for me.”

For a few short breaths, Dr. Min remains silent as your attention remains fixed on your colleague. “I need to check on a few other patients so I’ll leave you two alone for now," he finally says, breaking the silence. “I'll be back to check in on him again later, but if you have any questions or need anything in the meantime, the nurse is nearby."

With a nod and a soft "thank you," you watch Dr. Min exit the room, leaving you alone with Taehyung once more. After settling into a chair beside his bed, you silently observe the steady rise and fall of his chest. The rhythmic sound of his breathing is a small comfort amidst his vulnerable state. Despite everything, you're glad he's going to be okay.

As each minute passes, nurses come and go, and the hum of activity outside the room gradually fades into a background murmur. You had only planned to stay for an hour this morning, but time seems to slip away as the clock now nears 1 p.m. You had hoped Taehyung would be awake by now, but he remains still.

After a brief sigh, the thought occurs to you that you don't have to spend so many hours here, waiting for Taehyung to wake up. It's the weekend, and there are plenty of other things you could be doing instead. Dr. Min could easily call you the moment Taehyung wakes up. But something in your conscience urges you not to leave. Just give it another hour, you think. If he isn’t awake by then, you can come back tomorrow.

Suddenly, a slight movement catches your eye. Taehyung's fingers twitch, and his eyelids flutter. You nearly missed it with how lost you were in your thoughts.

Leaning forward with nervous relief, you softly call his name. It takes him a few seconds, but slowly, his eyes blink open. He turns his head slightly, gaze eventually finding yours, and you feel momentarily transfixed. It's unlike you to respond this way, but you had forgotten how piercing and comforting his eyes could be. A genuine smile immediately spreads across his face once your eyes meet, though not as boxy as usual due to his condition. Nevertheless, it's encouraging to see him awake and responsive.

“Hi," his voice is strained but recognizable. "It's...nice to see you."

“The feeling's mutual,” you respond gently. “How are you feeling?”

He shifts slightly, wincing a bit. “Like I got hit by a truck,” he mutters. “I’m sore all over.”

“You had a close call, but you’re in good hands now. Your doctor, Dr. Min, says you'll be okay, as long as you take it easy for a while. He was here earlier this morning, but he'll check in with you again soon.”

"You..." He hesitates, surprise flickering in his eyes. "You've been here since morning? What time is it now?"

"Oh, uh, it's around 1 in the afternoon," you say, gradually realizing the weight of your words. You consider whether or not to tell him the full extent of your stay. “I got here a few hours ago. Don’t worry.”

Taehyung nods slightly, a mix of gratitude and concern evident in his expression. “Thank you for being here,” he murmurs. “I wasn't sure if I'd be alone.”

A sinking feeling settles in your chest at his words, your throat tightening. Before you can ask what he means, he continues, “I must have taken a lot of your weekend from you.” His tone is apologetic, and your heart aches. Here he is, lying on a hospital bed, in pain and vulnerable, and he’s worried about inconveniencing you.

“I'm glad to be here,” you reassure gently. “I promise, you’re not alone. A lot of people care about you.”

Taehyung glances around, taking in the gifts and flowers scattered throughout the room. “From my fans, I’m guessing?” he asks, attempting to keep his tone light.

“And your colleagues too,” you reply. “We all want to see you get better." Taehyung returns his gaze to you, a faint smile lingering on his lips. Neither of you says anything, which unsettles you.

“Did you sleep okay?” you ask, the question coming out more hurriedly than intended.

“I drifted in and out for most of the night. It’s hard to get comfortable,” he admits, "I think I could still hear a lot around me. It felt like someone was holding my hand for a few minutes too, but I’m not sure how much of it was real or just dreams, though.”

Oh shit. You weren't expecting that answer.

The possibility that Taehyung might have heard you talking to him last night shouldn't be that embarrassing, yet your mind races with thoughts of what he might have heard or understood in his semi-conscious state. Not only did you share more than you probably should have, but you also touched his hand to feel his pulse, and he felt it.

“Well, um, I'm sorry to hear you had a rough night. You should rest more,” you suggest, trying to compose yourself. "I should get going anyway and let you sleep.” You begin standing from your seat but don't get far before the gentlest of touches brush against your wrist. When you look at Taehyung, he quickly retracts his fingers, concerned he overstepped.

"Shit, I'm sorry, __. I didn't mean to grab at you like that," he says softly. "It's just...would you mind staying with me a little longer, please? I'd really appreciate the company."

You can hear the yearning in his request. It's clear that he doesn't want to be alone, and you don't blame him, especially after the accident he's endured. Settling back into the chair, you agree to stay a bit longer, perhaps another half hour, before heading home; you realize you haven't eaten lunch yet.

"So, how are you doing?" he asks. "We haven't talked in bit."

His question triggers a flood of thoughts, the most recent interaction with your ex-husband being one of them. Up until now, you've managed to push his drunken call out of your mind, preferring to focus on Taehyung instead. However, Jungkook's unexpected confession still throws you for a loop. It's not that you're riddled with the need for clarity on its validity, especially since you don't believe him anyway. How could he claim to love you when he also admits he doesn't understand his own feelings? On top of that, being drunk while doing so—it doesn't make sense.

No, the real question now is what happens next. How do you proceed? Will he try to reach out again? The way he asked if you still loved him before you ended the call weighs on your mind even now.

You know you'll need to discuss this with Melody during your next therapy session.

Before you spiral further, you decide to steer the conversation away from personal matters and opt for a safer topic.

"The company is doing well," you reply with a smile. "The new campaigns we've put out recently have been pretty successful. Although," you add, a hint of curiosity in your tone, "the team has missed your frequent drop-ins, especially Namjoon." If you're honest with yourself, you've missed them too.

"How is he? Namjoon?"

"He's okay, but he's been concerned for you," you answer carefully. "When we heard the news, we came to see you together, but he was quite affected. He promised to visit once you woke up."

"So," Taehyung takes a moment to process. "That was this morning, right?"

"No, actually, it was yesterday."

There's a brief, awkward silence as you sense Taehyung might be thinking the same thing you are—about your presence last night. Surprisingly, he doesn't bring it up. Instead, he eyes you curiously, biting down on his lip slightly.

"I meant to stop by last week," he admits. "But we were wrapping up the final scenes of my film shoots. The producers were eager to finish them. I'm just thankful we got them done. I wanted to spend a day riding my bike along a scenic route until... well, until all of this happened. I don't remember much, but I'm just grateful Tan wasn't with me."

"Tan?" you ask, curious now.

"Yeontan, my pomeranian," Taehyung explains with a soft smile. "He means the world to me. My parents take care of him when I'm busy with filming. I was actually planning to drive up and visit them this weekend. And, of course, bring Tan back home with me. They live pretty far from here, so it's better that I go up to them if I can."

Well, that answers the question about his parents not being here yet, you think to yourself.

As Taehyung speaks, you can see a flicker of fondness and relief in his eyes when he mentions his dog. It must have been months since he last saw him.

"I bet you miss him a lot," you comment softly, "Tan."

"I do," he admits with a slight smile, "but I know he's being well taken care of. Hopefully, I can see him soon. And my parents too."

"I understand that feeling," you reply, nodding thoughtfully. "Pets have a way of becoming family, don't they? I had a cat named Evie when I was growing up. She was a feisty little thing with green eyes, always getting into mischief. We got her from the streets and she was so slim, but it didn't take her long to beef up with all the treats we gave her. Whenever I was feeling down, she would curl up next to me, as if she knew. It's funny how they have that kind of intuition, isn't it?"

Taehyung listens intently, a small smile playing on his lips. You feel a slight flush of embarrassment at your tangent. It's one of the few times you've shared something personal about yourself that wasn't work-related. Feeling like you might have overshared, you decide to stop, assuming Taehyung isn't interested in knowing that much.

You chuckle inwardly at yourself.

Jungkook was your husband for three years, and he never seemed to care about such personal details.

I—" you start, intending to apologize, but Taehyung interrupts.

"Did you have any other pets?" he asks, curiosity piqued.

You chuckle softly, reminiscing. "Yeah, we had... uh, god, you don't want to know how many pets we had."

"Try me," his eyes become playful, yet there's a seriousness behind them, like he really wants to know. It's unfamiliar.

"Alright," you chuckle, "aside from Evie, there were three other cats. Calvin and Misha were the adventurous ones, always climbing trees, while Pip was the cuddly lap cat. Then there were two dogs: Toby, our sneaky Chihuahua, and Bella, a terrier who growled at everyone. Oh, and we had three rabbits too. Cute, but also feisty."

Taehyung laughs, "I sense a theme going on."

"What theme?"

"Well," he grins, "It seems like your household was filled with some strong main characters."

You chuckle at his joke. "Yeah, our house was never quiet, that's for sure. Each one had their own personality and quirks."

"You don't have any now though? Pets, I mean," Taehyung asks.

"Sadly, I don't," you reply with a hint of regret. "The company takes up a lot of my time, and I don't think it would be right to leave a pet alone for extended periods. I might consider getting another cat, but right now, focusing on running the company leaves me with little spare time. I miss having them around though."

Taehyung mulls over your word carefully. “If I ever get out of this hospital...maybe I—”

Before he has the chance to finish, the hospital room door opens, and Dr. Min enters, his expression serious yet composed. His eyes widen slightly in surprise, not expecting to see you still here and Taehyung awake. “I’m sorry to interrupt,” he begins, glancing between you and his patient. “It’s good to see you up and looking a bit better."

Dr. Min approaches Taehyung's side, opposite to you. “How are you feeling?” he asks.

Taehyung's demeanor shifts instantly, his playful expression fading as he turns to answer. “Pretty sore, honestly,” he replies.

Dr. Min nods. “Let’s run a few checks to see how you’re doing.”

Sensing this is your cue to leave, you rise from your chair and reach out to touch Taehyung's hand. But you stop yourself short. Something about performing the physical action while he’s fully conscious instills a flutter of nerves within you. Instead, you gently tap his shoulder, causing him to meet your eyes. “I think I'll be going now, but it was nice talking to you,” you say softly. "Was there something you wanted to say earlier, though?"

He pauses for a moment before replying, his expression reminiscent of the time a few weeks ago when you declined his dinner invitation. You still don’t understand why he seemed somewhat disappointed; it's not like it was a date. He had made it clear he wanted to go out as colleagues. The only reason you declined was because you didn’t want him feeling pity for you, or the struggles that came with the divorce.

"It's okay, we'll have to save that conversation for another time," Taehyung's voice brings you back to the present. "Enjoy the rest of your day, __. Thanks again for staying with me."

"Of course," you reply, then turn to Dr. Min. "If you wouldn't mind letting me know when and if he can be discharged, I'd appreciate it. And Kim Namjoon too, since we're both nearby." Dr. Min nods in agreement. With that, you sling your bag over your shoulder and exit the room.

“He said what?!” Your best friend Jimin almost shouts through the video call, eyes wide with disbelief. You’ve just finished recounting your ex-husband's unexpected, drunken confession from the previous night. Jimin, who already holds a deep-seated grudge against Jungkook, looks livid.

“He had the nerve to say that to you? While he was drunk?” Jimin continues, his hands clenching into fists.

You nod, feeling a mixture of frustration and exhaustion. “Yeah, I told him not to call my number again and he hasn't contacted me since.” As expected, he likely forgot all about it.

“Good,” Jimin declares with a fierce protectiveness, his tone leaving no room for doubt. “You don’t need that kind of drama in your life, especially not from him. And if he even thinks about calling you again, just say the word, and I'll come down there and handle it personally.” He emphasizes 'personally' with such intensity that it makes you giggle for the first time tonight.

“Thanks, Jimin,” you say, a warm feeling spreading through you at his unwavering support. “I’m just trying to move on, focus on work, and other things.”

Jimin’s expression softens, and he nods firmly. “You're incredibly strong, __. Are you really okay though? It was a huge blow for him to make a confession like that and even though I dislike him, I know you still have some lingering feelings for him. I'm not a fool to believe you're unaffected.”

You take a deep breath, appreciating your best friend's perceptiveness. “It’s complicated. I’m trying so hard to move past everything, especially with Melody's help, and then he just…throws that at me. It’s like he’s trying to pull me back into his mess.”

Jimin’s eyes are filled with concern. “You don’t owe him anything. Remember that. He made his choices, and you have every right to move on without his baggage.”

“I know,” you sigh, rubbing your temples. “It’s just…easier said than done. But I’m working on it.”

“You’re doing great,” Jimin reassures, his voice gentle. “And you have every right to focus on yourself now. Don’t let him mess with your head.”

You nod, feeling a bit lighter with the support. “Thanks, I needed to hear that.”

“I'm always here for you love,” he says, his protective demeanor softening into a warm smile. “Now, enough about that idiot. How’s everything else? Work? Taehyung? Everyone at the office is talking about his unfortunate accident, poor sucker.”

At the mention of your colleague, you feel a sudden heat rise to your cheeks. Did the heaters in your apartment just turn up or something?

“He’s slowly recovering," you answer. "I saw him this morning and we talked for a bit. He’s... he’s been through a lot.”

Jimin raises an eyebrow, “You saw him yesterday too, right? And if my memory serves, you were at the hospital with him until the afternoon. I remember I texted you to see if you were free to call earlier than planned. Something you'd like to tell me?” A teasing grin suddenly spreads across his face, and you shake your head, knowing exactly what he's insinuating. It's like talking to Dr. Min all over again.

“Seriously, Chim, no, it's not like that," you deny instantly, heart racing a little. "He's been my company endorser for a little over six months now, and he’s been nothing but kind to me. With everything he’s been through, I just want to make sure he'll be okay. I feel somewhat responsible for him. Maybe I'm crazy.”

“Responsibility, huh?” Jimin smirks, unconvinced of your denial. “Sure. Because ‘responsibility’ usually makes people blush.”

You wave off his suspicions, a nervous chuckle escaping you. “I’m not, so if you wouldn't mind ceasing your teasing, that'd be great."

“Okay, okay,” Jimin chuckles, raising his hands in mock surrender. “But if you ask me, it sounds like more than just responsibility. Taehyung seems like a sweet guy, and you care about him. And I sense he feels the same way about you. Don't think I forgot about his little dinner request weeks back.”

You chuckle, brushing off his suspicions. “Oh, come on, enough. Believing that Kim Taehyung has any kind of interest in me is like believing that Jungkook loves me. It’s unfathomable. Taehyung's a colleague, that’s all.”

“Okay, excuse me? Unfathomable?” he scoffs, shaking his head. “Someone help! My best friend is selling themselves short, again. __, you’re amazing, and anyone, including Taehyung, would be lucky to have you. That ex-husband of yours was an idiot, but just because he couldn't see what he had doesn’t mean others can’t.”

You roll your eyes playfully, but Jimin’s words hit a soft spot. “Chim, you're sweet, but I'm just saying that Taehyung is on a completely different level. I’m just me... a 30-year-old divorcee with a half-decent startup.” Those alone are enough to have any man steer clear of you.

“Stop this, __. You're much more than that, and it's pretty damn incredible,” Jimin insists, his voice firm. “You’ve been through so much, and you’re still standing. That’s not something to brush off. Taehyung sees that. Anyone with half a brain can see that.”

You sigh, feeling a mixture of gratitude and skepticism. “I appreciate it, Chim. But let’s just drop it, please?”

“Alright, I won't push it," he concedes gently, "just know I’m here whenever you need.”

“Thanks, Jimin,” you reply, feeling a warmth in your heart. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Probably explode from all that bottled-up stress,” he jokes, making you laugh again. “But seriously, you’re doing great. Just keep taking it one step at a time, and call me if you need anything!”

As the call ends, you’re left with a lot to think about. Jimin’s words echo in your mind, and for a brief second, you find yourself wondering if maybe your best friend is right—that perhaps you do care about your colleague more than you’re willing to admit.

Well, either way, it doesn't matter; you've got enough on your plate as it is.

Starting with the stack of papers laid out on the coffee table, work you brought home that's awaiting your attention. It's a critical deal for your startup, one that could secure much-needed funding and propel your business to the next level.

Sighing softly, you reach for your laptop and open the latest project proposal.

You start your Sunday as you always do, with a book in hand, heading to your favorite café. It’s a ritual that’s been with you since your teenage years, and today, you feel a desperate need for its familiar comfort. After wrapping up the project proposal late into the night, your brain craved a break.

Entering the quaint café, you’re greeted by the comforting aroma of freshly brewed coffee and the soft murmur of conversation. Finding a cozy spot by the large window, you settle in for a day of reading, occasionally looking up to observe people passing by outside.

Hours slip away unnoticed in the serene atmosphere, lost in the pages of your book. Somewhere along the way, mid-sentence, your thoughts subconsciously drift to a conversation with Taehyung weeks before his accident—the day of your six-month anniversary.

You remember how he mentioned his interest in books that day, leaving you curious about what he enjoys reading. You imagine he might be into classic authors like Charles Dickens or Oscar Wilde. Then again, you might be mistaken.

Refocusing on your book, you manage to read another paragraph before thoughts of Taehyung intrude again. Did he have any company today? You quietly hope Namjoon paid him a visit. "Okay, __, calm down," you tell yourself, "Taehyung will be fine, and Namjoon definitely would have visited him now that he's awake." With a determined effort, you return to your book.

It isn't until the sun begins its descent that you decide it's time to pack up your things and head home. Passing by the hospital on your way, a sense of restlessness tugs at you once more. Should you stop and see Taehyung, even if only for a few minutes? The thought lingers, but then you recall Dr. Min's pending update on his discharge status. Maybe it's best to wait for his confirmation.

You continue driving, but the concern refuses to leave your mind. Eventually, you make a decisive turn, heading back towards the hospital. It wouldn't be as lengthy as last time—just a quick visit to check on how he's doing.

When you arrive at the hospital, you hesitate for a moment outside the entrance. It's Sunday evening, and visiting hours are likely limited. You check your phone quickly to see if Dr. Min has sent any updates, but there's nothing new.

Taking a deep breath, you decide to go in anyway.

Taehyung is awake when the nurse leads you to his room, casually flipping through a magazine. He looks up, his expression softening into a smile upon seeing you.

"Hey," you say softly, stepping inside. "I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd stop by. I hope it's okay."

"It's more than okay," he replies warmly, setting the magazine aside. "I'm happy to see you."

You nod, feeling relieved that he isn't disturbed by your presence.

"Though, in all honesty," he continues, "I didn't expect you back today."

"I just wanted to check on you and make sure you're okay," you admit quietly, taking a seat nearby. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm better, just a bit sore still," he says sincerely, his gaze meeting yours. "What about you? How's your Sunday been?"

"Quiet," you respond with a small smile. "Spent most of it reading at a café, and then decided to stop by here."

"Really?" His interest piqued, he asks, "Which one? Sometimes I do the same thing when I have some free time. Or, I'll read at the beach too. It's relaxing."

"Well, have you tried the one on Willow Street? I've been a regular there since I was 16."

"No... I'm not familiar with that one," he admits, "I usually go to the one on 5th."

"5th? You know, I don't recall a café on 5th, unless..." you pause, realization dawning, "oh no," you blurt out unintentionally.

"What?" Taehyung's eyes twinkle with amusement at your spontaneous reaction. "Have you been?"

You hesitate to answer, not wanting to risk offending him.

"Yes..."

"And?" Crap, you were hoping he wouldn't ask for details.

"Um... it's okay," you reply simply.

"What? Just okay?" Taehyung exclaims, feigning offense. "Their coffee and tea are decent, and they have those comfy armchairs by the window."

"I know, but there's just something about it," you reply with a playful shrug. "Maybe it's the lighting, or maybe I'm just picky."

"Fair enough," he chuckles. "Maybe I'll check out this Willow Street café sometime. You've been going there for years, so it must be good."

"Well, I highly recommend it." You can't help but feel a bit smug, though you try to keep a straight face. It's just nice to have someone take your suggestion seriously. "You'll have to tell me your review of the place if you go."

Taehyung nods thoughtfully in reply, his gaze lingering on you with a hint of admiration. You look away, pretending to straighten your jacket. Why is he staring like that? You're not used to being looked at without some sense of hostility.

Just as you begin to feel a bit awkward, the door swings open, and a nurse peeks inside.

"Sorry to interrupt," she says kindly, "but visiting hours are over for the evening."

You glance at your watch, surprised at how quickly time has flown. "Oh, okay," you reply, a touch disappointed. "I'll be heading out then, thank you."

Once the nurse leaves, you direct your focus back to Taehyung. He smiles understandingly, sitting up a bit straighter. "Thanks for stopping by," he says warmly.

"Yeah, of course," you reply, gathering your things. "Did Dr. Min mention having you discharged any time soon?"

He shakes his head. "Nothing yet. Might be here for a couple more days."

You nod, feeling sympathy for his extended stay. "Well, take care of yourself, okay? Let me know if you need anything."

"I will," Taehyung assures you with a grateful smile. He watches as you make your way to the door, but just before you can twist the metal knob, he speaks up agian. "Uhm...if you have time tomorrow, I wouldn't mind if you came in again. It was nice to...chat."

For the first time, Taehyung seems to stumble over his words. As someone who's naturally charismatic, not to mention a skilled actor, there's a hint of nervousness in his voice.

When you turn your head to glance back at him, his smile has faded, replaced by a hopeful look, hands gently clutching the blankets.

"Sure," you agree to his innocent request, somehow unable to resist. "I'll try to stop in tomorrow if I can."

His boxy smile returns instantly as he bids you one final goodnight.

As you walk out of the room, that same smile lingers in your mind—you're glad you decided to come by.

In the days that follow, you find yourself at Taehyung's hospital bed every evening after work. Initially fulfilling his wishes, you gradually realize you've grown fond of his company. Taehyung turns out to be easy to talk to, a good listener who encourages questions you wouldn't normally ask within office walls. Here you are again, immersed in yet another spontaneous conversation that neither of you minds.

"So, what's it really like?" you inquire, curiosity lacing your voice. "Being an actor? And what about kissing strangers? I've heard some co-stars end up together after playing an onscreen couple for so long."

Taehyung chuckles softly, his eyes crinkling with amusement. "Being an actor is both exhilarating and challenging," he begins, reflecting on his experiences. "Kissing scenes... well, they're not as glamorous as they seem on screen. There are a lot of technical aspects to consider, like camera angles and timing. As for getting involved with co-stars outside of filming, I wouldn't be familiar with that. I prefer to keep those lines pretty separate."

You listen intently, fascinated by his insights into a world so different from your own. But one thing sticks out to you—how does he handle kissing scenes if he were to be in a relationship? Wouldn't that get complicated?

"I often wonder what I'd do if I had a partner," Taehyung muses suddenly, his voice thoughtful, as if sensing your unspoken question. "About the kiss scenes, I mean. I haven't actually dated for a while." Really? You think, he cant be serious...

"I'd imagine they'd be understanding since it's part of the job," you offer, trying to match his contemplative tone.

"Is that how you'd respond?" Taehyung's question catches you off guard.

"Me?" you ask, feeling slightly dumbfounded.

"Yeah, I'm just curious. Would you be okay with that?"

"Uhm... well, honestly, probably not," you admit, feeling a bit awkward. "I think I'd have a hard time wrapping my mind around it. I'd kind of feel like I was sharing my partner. I don't want to share like that."

Shut up, shut up, shut up, you mentally chastise yourself. You definitely said too much.

To your surprise, Taehyung merely gives a small smile in response. "I think I'd feel the same," he says softly.

The subject ends there, as the conversation soon shifts to his latest project instead—a romantic comedy series titled with a playful nod to a four-leaf clover.

"You know, I've never seen a four-leaf clover in my life," you admit with a slight chuckle.

Taehyung laughs softly, his eyes brightening. "Really? They're supposed to bring good luck, you know."

"Good luck, huh? I guess I've never had the pleasure," you replied with a grin.

"Well, then it's settled," he declared with a playful glint in his eyes. "I'll find one for you once I'm out of here," he promises warmly.

You smile, exchanging a silent moment before hitting him with your next question. "Do you watch your own shows or movies?" you ask, genuinely curious.

Taehyung's expression shifts subtly, his gaze momentarily distant. "Honestly, I don't," he admits, his tone tinged with a hint of embarrassment. "I guess I've always felt a bit awkward seeing myself on screen. It's strange, right?"

You reassure him with a smile. "It's not so far-fetched, but I don't think there's anything to be embarrassed about. You're talented, Taehyung. I'm sure your performances are amazing."

Taehyung nods thoughtfully but then quirks an eyebrow at you. "But have you actually seen any of my work? It's a little cheesy."

You hesitate, feeling a touch sheepish. "Honestly, no," you confess. "I've never watched any of your shows or movies. But I will!"

A flicker of déjà vu crosses Taehyung's face, his expression turning thoughtful. "That's funny," he murmurs. "I feel like I've heard those exact words before, recently."

You chuckle nervously, trying to lighten the mood. He can't be referring to that night you spoke to him while he was asleep, right? "Maybe it's just a sign that I need to catch up on all the great acting I've been missing out on," you quip, hoping to diffuse any awkwardness.

Taehyung grins, his playful demeanor returning. "Well, I'll hold you to that. You'll have to give me your honest review."

"Deal," you agree with a nod. "So, as much as I hate to cut this short, I think I'm going to have to get going now."

"I understand, it's past 6:30 pm. See you tomorrow?"

"Sure thing," you reply warmly. "Get some rest."

By Thursday afternoon, you finally receive the long-awaited call from Dr. Min, informing you that Taehyung will be discharged the next morning. You're relieved that Taehyung is healthy enough to continue his recovery at home. Seeing him yesterday, he looked the best he's been since his accident. However, a small part of you feels annoyed that Dr. Min didn't call you—he called Namjoon instead.

It was an ordinary afternoon when your secretary's phone rang. Namjoon was crouched over at his desk, concentrating on a number of spreadsheets just moments before. You remember leaping over to him as soon as you heard the words, "he's ready for discharge tomorrow," leave his lips.

It's now Friday morning, and you're standing in front of your secretary's desk.

"So, you're off to pick up Taehyung now?" you ask, as casually as you can. You do your best to ignore the lingering irritation growing inside you.

"Yeah," your secretary finally replies, glancing up from his screen. "I'll drive over to the hospital in about half an hour."

"Okay." You nod, biting your tongue. So what if Namjoon gets to pick him up instead of you? It's fine, you should get over it.

It's just a little odd that Dr. Min chose to call Namjoon instead of you though. You know for a fact you've been much more involved with Taehyung's well-being than he has.

Of course, Taehyung and Namjoon are good friends, but your secretary has only gone to see him twice over the past week his buddy's been in the hospital. You've been there every day, so wouldn't it make sense that you be called first?

Evidently not.

Namjoon will be taking Taehyung home, and you likely won't be seeing him at all today. In fact, you're not even sure when you'll see him next. Technically, you have his address stored away in an HR file, but you're no creep. And you most certainly are not about to show up at his place unannounced.

It's not like Taehyung has texted you today either. Not even a quick update on his condition.

"Um..." Namjoon starts, shifting awkwardly in his chair. "Is there something else you wanted to say? I feel like you're kinda hovering over me now, to be quite honest."

"Oh, sorry," you respond, stepping back a bit. You didn't realize you were staring at him, wordless, for longer than normal. "Nothing else. Drive safe."

As if seeing right through you, Namjoon's expression softens. "If you want to see how Taehyung is, you can just text him. I'm sure he'll respond to you."

"No, it's okay," you quickly dismiss the suggestion. You don't want to bombard a man who's just getting out of the hospital with your texts. You'll leave him alone to rest.

Namjoon gives you a knowing look, eyeing your slightly hesitant state. "I'm serious, boss. Text him. You've been at his side this entire week, so if there's anyone who'd be more deserving of knowing what's up, it’d be you."

Deserving? That's a bit far, is it not? Yes, you've been visiting him, but it's not like you saved his life or anything. It's not that big of a deal. You just wanted to...make sure he was okay.

"I—When did you decide to call me boss again?" you switch subjects, but Namjoon remains unaffected.

"Text him," Namjoon says for the final time before reaching for his keys in his desk drawer. "I gotta get going, but I'll be back after I drop Tae off."

"Tae?" You haven't heard him called that before.

"Yeah, it's kinda a pet name. Sorry, I started calling him that once we became friends, so it slips out here and there. It's like second nature now."

"Got it," you nod, a bit disappointed. Maybe you weren't as close to Taehyung as you thought. "Make sure he gets home okay," you finish.

"I will." Namjoon gets up from his desk and heads out of the office. You turn around and return to your own office once he's out of sight.

While Namjoon is out, his phone rings incessantly. You find yourself getting up from your desk multiple times to take calls. By the afternoon, you're exhausted from the constant interruptions.

Maybe you should consider giving the poor man a raise.

Before the thought fully develops, his phone rings again. You don't even bother checking the caller ID anymore; you simply pick up the phone and answer in your sweetest voice.

"__? I thought I’d be hearing Namjoon first... hey," his voice is hesitant. "I hope I’m not interrupting anything."

"Jungkook," you reply cautiously, instantly recognizing his voice. "Why are you calling my work phone?"

"I... I didn't know how else to reach you. Can I come in or can you come into the parking lot? I have something to give you."

You pause, feeling a rush of unease. You haven’t spoken to Jungkook since last Friday when he called you out of the blue. Honestly, you hoped you wouldn’t hear from him, especially after telling him not to call again. It's strange that he keeps finding ways to show up unexpectedly.

"What is it you need to give me, Jungkook?" you ask bluntly, "I'm very busy."

There’s a brief silence on the other end before he answers, "It’s... It’s something personal. I’d rather not discuss it over the phone. Please, can you just come down for a moment?"

You weigh your options, torn between curiosity and apprehension. His unpredictability lately has left you unsure of what to expect. "Jungkook, I really don’t think—"

"Please," he interrupts, his voice sounding more urgent. "I promise it won’t take long."

Taking a deep breath, you decide to handle this with as much grace as you can muster. "Fine. I’ll be down in a minute."

You end the call and sit back, trying to steady your thoughts. His sudden request feels odd, and part of you worries about what he might say or do next. As you make your way to the parking lot, you mentally prepare yourself for another potentially difficult encounter.

When you arrive, Jungkook stands near his car, nervously shifting his weight from one foot to the other. His usual confident demeanor seems replaced by a sense of unease.

"Hey," he starts, his voice tentative, "thanks for agreeing to meet."

You give a brief nod, keeping your tone neutral. "Yeah, sure. What's up?"

Jungkook shifts awkwardly, his gaze dropping momentarily before meeting yours. "I wanted to apologize," he continues, his voice tinged with regret. "I'm sorry for calling you up drunk."

You feel a flicker of irritation. This is what he wanted to give you? An apology that's seven days late? You figured he would have just forgone the apology by now.

"Why now?" you ask, crossing your arms over your chest, a defense mechanism you've developed. "It's been a week. I’m not sure if you realize that or not though."

"I know," he says quickly, his eyes earnest. "I wanted to come sooner, but I wasn't sure if you'd want to see me or just never hear from me again."

You scoff slightly, "Well, for the first time, you are completely right. I don't want to see you, Jungkook." You try to keep your voice steady, but the raw edges of your emotions bleed through. There’s no point sugarcoating it at this stage; he’ll just keep pushing your boundaries if you don’t become firm with him.

He winces at your words, nodding slowly. "You have every right to feel that way. I messed up, big time. I just wanted you to know that I'm truly sorry. You deserve someone who isn't as screwed up as I am. But I still mean everything I said that night. I do love you. It took me until now to realize that, apparently."

You sigh, the weight of his words pressing down on you. Love? Now? After everything? Somehow, it feels more like a burden than anything.

"Jungkook, love isn't a get-out-of-jail-free card," you say slowly, your voice somewhat shaky. "It's not something you can just throw out there to fix things. Not only did you divorce me, but you also led me to believe we could actually be something. All those weeks of you being attentive and showing up for me after I shared my feelings made me believe that you were honestly trying to make our marriage work, that you were committed. You lied to me, discarded me, and now that I'm not around, you suddenly miss me? No, I'm sorry. You broke my trust, and that's not something you can just apologize away."

You pause, feeling the weight of your words settle in the tense air between you and Jungkook.

He looks down, nodding again. "I get it. I really do. And I don't expect you to forgive me or anything. I just wanted you to know that I understand how much I hurt you, and I'm sorry. I understand if you hate me."

You take a moment to collect your thoughts, trying to keep your voice steady despite the emotions threatening to stir inside. "Jungkook," you begin carefully, meeting his eyes. "What happened between us was painful. You calling me drunk last week was also painful. I'm sorry about the challenges you had with your parents, but it's no excuse to put that on others. If you need someone to discuss personal matters with, I suggest you see a professional."

You pause, taking a deep breath before continuing.

"I don't hate you, okay? I'm not that cold-hearted. There's still part of me that I think might always hold space for you, but I can't just forget everything. I need to move on, and that means you can't keep calling me at random times. It’s not fair to either of us. I appreciate the apology, but I don't think we can go much further."

He nods solemnly, understanding your stance. "Okay," Jungkook replies softly, his voice filled with a sadness you hadn’t expected. "I understand. I'll respect your wishes and leave you alone. Take care of yourself, okay? I...I want you to be happy, even if it’s not with me," he says, his eyes earnest. "And... I'm really sorry for everything."

He begins to back away toward his car, and as he does, it hits you—it’s over.

"Take care, Jungkook," you say gently. "Don't overwork yourself, alright? Stay healthy."

He looks at you, forcing a smile. "You know I can't do that. It isn't in my blood." He sings the last part, referencing a song you both used to joke about, and you let out a small chuckle despite yourself.

"God, Jeon, I thought you'd stop with that song by now." you say, shaking your head.

"Nah," he replies, shaking his head with a faint grin as he opens his car door. "I'm taking it to my grave. I'll see you later, __."

You know the last part is a lie, an empty promise to soften the blow. Still, you respond, "Yeah, see you."

With that, you part ways in the parking lot, each going your separate ways. As you walk back to your office, the weight of the finality settles in. It's all over, you think, feeling the sting of a single tear trailing down your cheek. Unbeknownst to you, a similar tear streams down Jungkook's face as he drives away, each tear falling for completely different reasons.

Two weeks pass, and Jungkook keeps his word. He hasn’t called, texted, or shown up at your work. It’s as if he’s become a stranger, someone you once knew but is now part of a distant past.

Your days begin to regain a sense of normalcy. The emotional weight of the past few months slowly starts to lift, allowing you to refocus on your work and personal well-being. The company demands your attention, and you dive into projects, meetings, and strategies with a renewed energy.

Yet, despite the return to routine, there's a persistent sense of something missing. You haven’t talked to Taehyung at all since he got discharged from the hospital. You haven’t seen him either, and the silence pulls at you more each day.

Every time you try to get information about him from Namjoon, he gives you the same response: "Just text him. Don’t overthink it; he’ll be glad to hear from you." Once, you sensed that Namjoon wanted to say more but stopped himself short, making the excuse that it wasn’t for him to say. Whatever that meant.

You’re on your way home from running errands when the thought enters your mind for the umpteenth time: should you text Taehyung?

You’re torn between respecting his privacy and wanting to check in on him. He hasn’t reached out, so maybe he’s trying to distance himself or just needs time to recover alone, now that he’s in the comfort of his own home. On the other hand, you can’t shake the feeling that checking in would be the right thing to do.

As you approach your apartment building, you pull over into a quiet parking spot, letting your car idle. Gripping your phone, you take a deep breath and finally decide to text him.

You: Hey, Taehyung. I hope you’re doing well. Just wanted to check in and see how you’re feeling. Let me know if you need anything. We still miss you at the office!

You stare at the message for a moment before hitting send. The butterflies in your stomach flutter as you wait. What if he doesn’t respond? What if he doesn't want to hear from you?

You end up deleting the message entirely.

Forget it, you think, if he wanted to hear from you he would have texted by now, right? Just leave it alone. You said you'd support him while he was in the hospital and you did. Now he needs his space to finish healing. He'll reach out when he's ready.

Your phone buzzes the next minute, snapping you out of your thoughts. You glance at it, half hoping that Taehyung was secretly telepathic. But it isn’t from him. Instead, it’s a notification from a friend inviting you to a small get-together this coming weekend.

Smiling, you accept the invitation.

Turns out your friend's get-together was a singles mixer. Unsurprisingly, you weren't approached much, if at all. It seemed the men were either too nervous, still associating you with your ex-husband, or not quite into accomplished women. That didn't stop them from ogling you, though, as your friend insisted that you dress for the affair. You didn't choose anything flashy, but it was certainly flattering.

Leaving without a phone number didn't bother you, though. At thirty years old, most of the people were younger than you, including your friend who was a couple of years younger. Plus, you found your mind often wandering to the one man you hadn't heard from in nearly three weeks—Kim Taehyung. Should you stop overthinking and finally listen to Namjoon's suggestion? Maybe it's time to contact him.

Lost in thought on your drive home, you snap back to reality when you slam on the brakes at a sudden red light. Damn, you hadn't noticed it change so quickly. Shaking off any lingering daze, you refocus and spot a man crossing the street ahead, a little dog trotting beside him on a leash.

"Taehyung," you whisper to yourself. "What is he doing out here, especially on this slipper—shit!"

Your heart skips a beat as Taehyung stumbles on the ice, struggling to keep his balance. Concerned, you pull up to the side of the road as soon as the light turns green, parking quickly and jumping out of your car to rush over to him. He leans against a brick building, his dog, Tan, yelping at your approach. Cute little guy, but you're focus is on Taehyung.

"Damn," he mutters, trying to steady himself. His eyes widen when he catches sight of you. "__, I—" he begins.

"What are you doing, Kim Taehyung?" you scold gently. "Are you trying to hurt yourself again?"

Taehyung meets your gaze, his Gucci scarf wrapped snugly around his neck. "No," he replies earnestly. "I just needed some fresh air. It's been nearly three weeks since I was discharged, and Dr. Min said short walks with Tan are okay now. My parents were here for a while, but they left this weekend."

His explanation sinks in as you take in his appearance. Despite the chill in the air, he looks better than the last time you saw him. His cheeks are slightly flushed from the cold, and there's a determination in his eyes that wasn't there before.

"You should be more careful," you reply softly, stepping closer to him. Tan, sensing the shift in attention, continues to bark happily, tail wagging. "Are you okay? My car is right here, if you need me to take you home or anything."

Taehyung nods, a small smile playing on his lips. "I know, I know. Sorry for worrying you." He gestures to Tan, who is now circling around your legs in excitement. "Tan here doesn't seem to mind the ice at all, and surprisingly, he doesn't mind you either."

You chuckle softly, crouching down to pet the little dog. "Is he usually this friendly?"

"Not at first, no," Taehyung replies, his tone lighter now. He glances down at you, his eyes softening. "I'm glad I ran into you, though. It's been...a while."

You nod, standing to your feet. "It has. I'm glad to see you're doing better."

"I am," he affirms, his gaze steady on yours. "Thanks to you, mostly. You were there for me when I needed it the most."

"Oh, come on," you say, waving off the comment. "I didn't do that much."

Taehyung's smile widens, a hint of amusement in his eyes. "You did more than you realize."

You feel a slight blush creeping up your cheeks at his words, but you maintain eye contact, appreciating the warmth in his gaze. The longer you stand there, staring at each other, the uneasier you feel. Perhaps you shouldn't ask the question that's been on your mind, but it slips out before you can stop it.

"Why didn't you call?" you ask, surprising both yourself and Taehyung as he simultaneously voices the exact same question.

Taken aback by the simultaneous question, you both chuckle nervously, breaking the tension. Taehyung scratches the back of his neck, sheepish.

"I thought about it every day," he admits, his voice quiet but sincere. "But I wasn't sure if you wanted to hear from me. I already took so much of your time, and I didn't want to ask more from you. So, I asked Namjoon to pick me up from the hospital. I thought maybe it would be better for me to wait for you to reach out and focus on recovering."

You nod, understanding flooding your expression. "I felt quite similar. I thought maybe you asked Namjoon because he's your friend. I didn't want to hound you when you just got released from the hospital, so I decided to let you recover in peace. I guess in the end, I was also waiting for you to reach out with an update of some kind."

Taehyung takes a few seconds to fully absorb your words before replying. "I'm sorry," he says softly, his eyes reflecting genuine remorse. "I didn't mean to make you feel like I was avoiding you. I would have been more than happy with you picking me up instead of Namjoon. I realize that I should have at least reached out to update you instead of going silent. I'd like to think of you as my friend too. But I wasn’t sure if you felt the same, and I just didn't want to burden you." His gaze becomes downcast as he stares at the ground beneath him.

You're unsure where you find the courage, but you bring your hands up to cup his cheeks, gently lifting his face so he meets your eyes. You have to stand on your tiptoes a bit, which he finds endearing.

"I’d like to consider you my friend too, and that means you shouldn't worry about burdening me anymore, Tae," you say softly, your touch lingering momentarily on his face, caught up in the moment. When you realize what you've done, you pull back slightly, flustered. "Um… sorry, I didn't mean to call you that."

"It's okay," he responds, his voice gentle. "I don't mind. You can call me Tae from now on if you'd like. Also, you're not a burden either, you never were to me."

You're speechless for a second before replying. "So, friends then?" you ask. "No more mixed signals and reaching out when we want?"

"I mean, I’d like that as long as you do too," he confirms with a warm smile, though his eyes say there's more that he's left unsaid. You don't notice, however.

"Text me whenever you have something on your mind," he continues.

"I will," you promise. “You too.”

"Definitely.” Taehyung pauses, glancing down at Tan who's decided to lay down by his feet. "So, I was going to take a walk with Tan at the park nearby. Any chance you'd like to join me?" His gaze shifts back to you, hopeful yet uncertain.

"I'd like that," you reply genuinely. "But we're taking my car over, so you don't break a hip on this ice, old man."

Taehyung's mouth gapes open as he shakes his head. "How many times do I need to tell you? I'm only two years older than you. Two!"

It's surreal.

How much you and Taehyung have started becoming friends, that is.

Almost two months have already passed, and it feels like just yesterday you were merely colleagues, you his boss.

Saturdays have become your day with Taehyung now. While part of you insists it's to prevent him from slipping on the ice again, deep down, you both know there's more to it now that he's almost fully recovered from his injuries.

Each weekend, you find yourselves exploring different parks and streets, swapping childhood stories, and sharing laughter over the dumbest things. Today, however, would be different. With rain threatening to drench the city, Taehyung suggested a change of plans—a cozy movie day indoors. Little did he know, you had a surprise in store for him.

You dash up to the front door, a bag of homemade food in one hand and an umbrella in the other.

Taehyung opens the door with a grin, holding his own umbrella. "Hey! Perfect timing," he chuckles, taking the umbrella from you and gesturing inside. "Come in. It's freezing out there today."

You step inside, shaking off the raindrops and removing your shoes. The warmth of his home envelopes you, a comforting contrast to the chilly rain outside.

"I brought something," you announce, holding up the bag. "Guess what it is?"

Taehyung looks at you curiously, his eyebrows raised in anticipation. "Hmm," he muses, pretending to ponder. "Knowing you, it's probably my favorite spicy chicken wings from that place near your office."

"Very close, Tae. Except these chicken wings were made by your favorite person in the whole world," you tease, handing him the bag with a grin.

Taehyung's eyes lit up as he takes the bag from you. "No way," he says, a mix of disbelief and excitement in his voice. "You made them yourself? You're the best, __. Seriously."

"It's the least I could do," you reply with a smile, following him into the living room where the TV flickers. "Besides, it's pouring out there. Movie day with good food seems like the perfect plan."

"Absolutely," he agrees, setting the food down on the coffee table. "I was thinking we could start with that new action flick I heard about."

"Aww, but I thought you said we could watch one of your movies instead?" you argue playfully, sinking into the couch. Tan bounds over, wagging his tail in excitement at the prospect of company. You scratch behind his ears while Taehyung sets up the movie.

"What? I don't remember saying that. Was I drunk that day?" he jokes.

"Well... maybe?" you tease back.

"I told you, __, I don't like watching my own films. It's weird, and half the time it's me kissing the female lead. You're going to need to watch those on your own time," he quips, his tone more serious than intended. The truth is, he really would rather not be there when you watch him kiss his co-stars.

"Alright, alright, getting aggressive over there," you chuckle, not seeing the faint rosy tint that's crept up on his cheeks. "We'll watch the action movie."

As the opening scenes roll, you can't help but steal glances at Taehyung. Despite the seriousness of his recent health issues, he seems more at ease today, a genuine smile gracing his face as he takes a seat beside you. It feels good to see him like this, relaxed and feeling more like himself.

Halfway through the movie, he nudges you gently. "Thanks for coming over today," he says softly, his gaze warm as it meets yours. "And for the food, of course."

"You don't have to thank me," you reply sincerely, nudging him back with a smile. "I'm happy to do it."

Unexpectedly, Taehyung reaches for the TV remote, pausing the scene playing in front of you. "Hey, __," he says, turning to face you, a hint of nervousness in his eyes as they shift from side to side.

"What is it, Tae?" You feel a slight unease, sensing tension. He's once again just staring into your eyes, wordless.

"Do you..." he starts but stops short, his voice trailing off.

"Yes?" You search his face for clues as to what he's trying to say.

"Would you want to go to a party with my family?" he finally asks, his words coming out in a rush. "My parents are hosting to celebrate my recovery, but really it's just an excuse to get the family together."

"So, a family reunion?" Your voice drops slightly, a mix of surprise and...disappointment? Why had you been expecting something different?

"I mean, yes, sort of. You don't have to if you don't want to," he adds quickly, almost anxiously. "I know it might be uncomfortable for you, but you've been here for me during so much of my recovery. It would mean a lot to have you there. My parents want to meet you too."

"Um... well, I've never been to a family function before," you admit hesitantly.

"You haven't?" Taehyung looks genuinely surprised.

You shake your head. "My family's never been one to do those types of things."

"Well, consider yourself part of my family then. Come with me, __. They'll love you."

"I-I don't know about that," you say softly, a flicker of uncertainty crossing your face. "How can you be so sure that they'll like me?"

"Because I do," he urges gently, "and if I like you, so will they."

You're taken aback by his words, unsure how to respond. Surely he means this in a platonic way. Despite growing closer, you and Taehyung are just friends, setting aside any previous suspicions of romantic interest. Maybe if circumstances were different—if you weren't divorced—then maybe you could entertain the idea.

For now, you'll leave that side of him alone and simply be his friend. You feel a bitter aftertaste in your mouth.

"Okay," you finally say, nodding your head. "I'll come. When is it?"

"They want to do it next weekend, weather permitting. We can carpool if you'd like, or you can take your own car," he offers.

"I'll think about it," you reply, trying to process the unexpected turn of events.

"Great." Taehyung flashes a boxy grin. "Thank you, I was so nervous to ask."

"Of course," you say, offering a tight-lipped smile. Taehyung unpauses the movie, and you return your attention to the TV screen. Minutes following your phone buzzes and a text message from Jimin appears on your screen.

Chim 🐥: __! Hate to be bringing this up, but have you seen the news about Jungkook? Looks like he's preparing to step down as CEO. Did you know about this?"

What? You had no clue.

a/n: If you are mad at me, well....I'm sorry but pls blame jk instead. But I am hoping you enjoyed! 🥰 vote jjk or kth

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side note: I tried tagging readers in comments but most of them didn't go through, so i'm sorry about the clutter here...😬

no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton

[ohnopeh]

i was rewatching gallavich scenes (no one’s surprised) and to be honest, i think the whole monogamy thing is pretty clear from the beginning ( to us, cause they’re dumb )

neither of them want the other to fuck other people but they share one braincell thinking the other wants to mess around. ian talks about monogamy saying its about not having sex with others and mickey expression changes

he’s clearly panicking wondering if ian mentioned it because his husband wants to fuck around. he doesn’t want to lose ian and is afraid that saying yes to monogamy could be a deal breaker (im pretty sure mickey was feeling insecure as fuck about not being a good husband since they fought about the money, job etc.)

when ian sees mickey’s reaction, he mistakes it as disappointment/disagreement with being monogamous. you can totally see he’s regretting mentioning it and wondering how the hell he’s going to get out of that situation.

he’s like ‘what the fuck what is this reaction what is going on why isn’t he saying he wants to have sex with me only?’ (cause again, one braincell shared)

so they’re just dumb fuckers who want the other to be happy but they just confuse each other, not realising they want the same thing. mickey asks ian what exactly is counted as having sex : blowjobs, proper fucking? because he wants to know what ian would want from others and if he can handle that, but of course ian thinks that’s mickey asking because he is the one who wants to fuck around!

none of them want to just disappoint the other so mickey plays it cool saying ‘you don’t want to fuck other people?!’ (reminds me of ‘you don’t want to fuck angie? everybody fucks angie’) and of course ian’s defensive too saying ‘me fucking you only? no… so difficult… no… i could never… not like ive been doing so for 10 years… going back to you all the time… saying sex with you is fucking fantastic… no….’

but then ian says

that’s his way of trying to let mickey know he’s actually not into the whole open relationship thing. but considering they just keep saying they want to do it, mickey simply thinks ian is being hypocrite, not being able to see what he truly meant by that. when ian writes down that he wants monogamy, he’s being honest and i suppose he kept on thinking mickey wanted to fuck around cause he didn’t show his answer (which was mickey’s way of trying to do what ian wanted cause he always want ian to be happy and will do anything for him)

they just keep being dumb as hell until the episode where they have sex with other people. you can see mickey has realised ian isn’t into it but doesn’t want to admit it, to keep mickey happy— because mickey is taking the piss out of ian by pretending he’s having the time of his life trying to find new friends to fuck around with.

( again, ian is forcing them to find gay friends just because he thinks that’s what they’re supposed to do to archive their new happy life )

mickey staying with the other gay couples for drinks he doesn’t like, company he dislikes. he waits for ian to call it a night and even then he took the piss out of ian asking if he really wanted to leave. they end up having sex with the others but once they’re home ian says it was a waste of time and mickey points out they did want ian wanted so badly, making gay friends and having sex with other people. so how is that a waste of time if ian wanted this all along?

mickey asks

(are you still going to pretend we want to fuck other people?) and ian admits that, no, he doesn’t want that. he doesn’t want gay friends to talk about their sex life or friends to bang just because. explaining he’s okay to have lip ( and mickey ) as their only friends cause they’re alike and that’s what he needs. he doesn’t have to force himself to be different or fit somewhere.

i know people also discuss the scene where ian is at the gym in their new apartment, where he smiles at the guy flirting with him. to me that scene was just ian being taken by surprise ( as he didn’t really expect the guy to hear him ) and maybe even glad that there are gay and accepting people around them (not like southside) so it only proved more and more that their life in the north side could do good to mickey too. it makes sense because in the same episode mickey freaks out about the new place, it shows how they react to changes and ‘safeness’ as mickey says it makes him feel uncomfortable to have a better life, something new that he has no control over (like him saying he has no idea how to escape safely from the northside/their new house— if needed)

long story short : they are dumb and always want the other to be happy but scared to communicate properly and mess things up. they only want each other in all the way and that’s what it is and will be forever! shameless writers for s10-11 were something else tho, im sure there were better ways to write this plot but still lol

[puckpocketed]

who is #43?

Hello !! First off thank u for visiting. If you clicked read more by accident rip sorry it’s a lot of text. ENJOY!!! <3

1. This was the photo reference I used. I really did mean it when i said he photographs well!! I really like how scrungly he looks at times lol. v paintable

2. here’s a timelapse for your viewing pleasure in video + gif form <3

3. Process breakdown below. I am not formally trained, so don’t take any of this as professional advice!! The way i paint has been compared to channeling some evil contract with a demon also. So um . Im saying that i dont remotely think that this is efficient or correct, its just whats comfortable for me <3

3a) the dreaded lining phase. I have 2 modes of operation when it comes to painting - either i go full-dick with fancy inking/sketching + cel shading (rare, unrefined, haven’t figured out a nice workflow yet) OR i do a very very basic chicken scratch set of lines like so:

It’s less about being realistic here and more about laying down some guide lines for the chaos ahead. If i thought i could get away with it, I would start every rendered painting i do with laying down colours — but unfortchh ive tried that before and it usually ends in really weird proportions. Even with the lines i still need to make adjustments. This is something no people except me would notice but look at the above sketch; the eyes are too big and slightly too far apart, the forehead is too small and thus the hair is also not quite big enough… I have a bad habit of drawing eyes too big on faces, they’re my favourite facial feature to draw.. i barely resisted giving him big cow eyelashes (I love big cow eyelashes… all of my OC’s and most of my more stylised fan art of characters get big cow eyelashes… god…. Big cow eyelashes SAVE ME……….)

Anyway. Structure of the face + hand somewhat established. <3

3b) Underpainting!! Okay stay with me here . Ever since i figured out i dont have to paint in 03925893853 different layers, I’ve joyfully painted on 1 layer as much as possible. I dont have the brain power all the time to be managing layers so I simply dont work with that many layers. For this painting, the skin in its entirety was painted on one layer, the hair on another layer, and the effects on the last layer. There was a placeholder background off-white/grey colour for a while there, and I duplicated the line layer — one for figuring out where to lay colours, and one hidden for later so i could check back to see how accurate to the sketch/proportions were to the actual painting. 6 layers, 2 of which i painted the bulk of the piece on, 1 more at the end.

3c) here’s where I started carving out features. I think about objects in terms of volumes and light rather than lines. i love painting and sculpting because of this!! Here you see where I’ve begun to define his features — his eyelids, his bags, his nostrils. Just refining what was there before. The suggestion of facial hair before i gave it up and left it for later (his face is so naked the WHOLE time)

3d) nose bridge highlight, suggesting his eyebrows, a cheek highlight. A touch more coral red and muted yellow pull away from the grey/blue underpainting. Strategically leaving some of it peeking through.

3e) i truly start messing with the fidelity of his features here. Red lipstick <3 and some violet/blue for shadows on the right side of his face.

3f) the part where it starts looking like q.hughes to me (though, my friend said i got his vibe pretty early on which is such a compliment.. waaaaa…..) I love this part of every painting i do. I know it’s definitely not the Correct order since other parts of the entire painting are simply Not Rendered or Done, but whos gonna stop me?? :3

I love love loveeee painting faces. Adding the little shinies to his eyes + lips + upper lip + nose … you don’t know how much of a difference it makes until you do it. Also i snatched his eyebrows

3g) i really pushed the red/coral/ochre/orange here. Note the yellow highlights on his cheekbones, the forehead, and the thin thin line of pink right between where his bottom lip ends and his chin shadow starts <- very important . To ME!!!!!!! Also highlighting his waterline and adding his lashes was so so fun <3

3h) FACIAL HAIR!!! And I started rendering his hand. Some micro adjustments made to his face for proportion check.

3i) i start painting his hair in earnest and realise his forehead is too small so i make the adjustment. I really love how it falls into his eyes in this photo. <3

3j) i make some final adjustments to his eyes — a bit smaller, closer together. And i refine the outline of his jaw, push the stylisation of it just a little.

3k) Finishing details; his flyaway hairs, his moles, a bit of texture on his face, shadows cast by his hair, his little forehead cut <3

3l) i adjusted his hand here, added more texture to his skin, refined his hair a tiny bit more, and made the decision not to fuck around painting his jersey because i wanted the focus to be his face <3

3m) Canucks blue and green. Captain at 23. His form bleeds into the background. He is the franchise.

theee most fun ive had painting anything. and i finally feel... warmed up? if that makes sense. art for me is like. if i dont do it in a while it feels like nothing goes right when i come back to it. i hate that feeling, and the most difficult hurdle to clear is letting myself feel that until i get back into my Zone. after all this time i feel like im BACK !!!!!!!

i loved painting this fella. hes SO Shaped. <3

Apologies i simply do Not have the energy to write the alt text for all of these so i hope the little blurbs are okay aslkjasdklj. i gotta post and go to bed . if u made it this far, thank you for reading!!

[hearts4werka]

Graduation Surprise

- 𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐆𝐎𝐑𝐘 : 𝐅𝐋𝐔𝐅𝐅 -

Summary: Today was the day you’ve been working for very hard, graduation day. You don’t know how but managed to graduate with the highest GPA in your class, if you couldn’t think things could get bad now, they did. After some issues occurring in your family, none of your family members attended your graduation. Thankfully there were your friends who could attend and filled up the spots in the room, cheering me on the whole day as I finally gave the biggest speech of my life. A surprise celebratory graduation dinner is hosted by your friends at a fancy restaurant, but little did you know there was more to come in the surprise…

Warnings: mentions of suicide, grief over the passing of a loved one, family issues, ?mentions of verbal abuse?, swearing and possibly more that may trigger some readers!

- > This was requested by this anon request so big thanks to them for the idea!

Today is the best day of my life, and the worst. Its graduation day. Its not like I havent done good in school, quite the opposite actually, I'm graduating with the title of the top student with the highest GPA in my class. With this big of an achievement, I couldnt be more happy with my life but for as much as I am feeling eternal happiness with myself, theres this small pit inside of me that dreaded this day for as long as my mother was not speaking to me.

After the one unfortunate day I've had enough of her blaming for evey small little misfortune happen in her life, finally standing up for myself and telling her how I feel about her constantly victimizing herself like she isnt the problem, now slightly backfired on me. From how bad the argument ended up to be she refuses to attend the most important day of her own daughters life, graduation day. Even with all of my success achieved at my age she still calls me acomplete dosgrace to this family and a failure, Ive done all in my power to prove her wrong and I did but her opinion seems to remain the same about me.

I've cried and vented about it all to my best friend, Chris who seems to be the only person who has my back and always denies any of my mothers hurtful words, always cuddling me in his arms until my sobs calmed down to a substainal level or until out of exhaustion I fell unconcious, it wasnt our first fight but it never was this bad as it was this time to cut off any speaking words between us. We all used to be the perfect picture family everyone wanted to be like us, looked up to us but ever since my father left us and not awhile after commited suicide it all has flipped my world around, only bad things came my way after that unfortunate event accured and I used to agree with all of my mothers claims that it was all my fault, that I wasnt a good enough daughter to him and that I ddidnt love him enough.

I loved him more than I could love anyone ever, he was the man I looked up to everyday and wanted to be him one day. To make him proud of me, I hope he is looking down at me and smilling at my accomplishments with me. No matter how hard I fight back the pricking tears swelling in my eyes whenever I think of him, I just cant fight them long and would go so far to have a breakdown when I'm hanging around Chris cause I know he;s the one person who wont judge me and instead of asking if im okay, will just scoop the sobbing mess ive made of myself and cradle me until I calmed down.

• 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐎𝐟 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

As I nervously stand in the line to finally receive my diploma, my fingers fiddling with my gown I glance around the crowded area filled with the rest of the students parents and loved ones I spot Chris, Matt, Nick, Quen, Larray and Madi sitting in black chairs as the amazing people I am glad to call my friends with full proudness spread across all of their faces, cheering me on from the distance and silently reassuring me everything is fine. I chuckle silently as a small smile rises on my face, the nervousness still swirling on my face but now overcomed by the excitement and pure happiness the most important day has finally came.

Next to all of them is a single empty chair left as I imagine my father sitting down on it, or his deceased ghost, smilling and clapping with all of the others. I feel his looming presence in the air which makes it just sweeter and better to breathe into my lungs. As I stepped closer and closer to the final point, I breathed in a sharp breath before steppng onto the stage and being handed the diploma ive wanted to hold in my hands for so long, I am ripped out of my thoughs as I hear very loud cheering and my eyes rip away from the piece of paper in my hand and notice all of my friends standing up, applauding and cheering as loud as they were allowed to.

My face immediately lights up at the sight, giving them a quick wave before proceeding with the remainder of the graduation ahead of me. Shaking the professors hands with silent 'congratulations' and 'thank you's passed by before I take a seat next to the other honoured students next to the stage, getting ready to at the end of the event present a speech. Not all of us are giving one since not everyone wanted or agreed to do one, I keep on thinking of what I could possibly say on the stand, which words to let fall from my lips and whic are inappropriate to speak out loud.

I listen to the other students speeches, most of them thanking their family for all of the support they received during this path in their life up until this moment, how they achieved what they managed to in this journey. Before I know it, its my turn and my name gets called up on the stand for now my speech, with a shaky breath I stand up from my seat and make my way over to the last thing I need to do before finally graduating from college and moving on with my life.

Clearing my throat to seek any hidden motivation and confidence in the dark shadowy corners of my mind to put it towards this speech but the only positive thing thats surrounding the tense air around me is the comforting presence of my father, oh how I would love for him to witness this moment and live in it with me right now. I'm doing it again, I'm thinking about my father too much that I wont be able to speak, I take another deep breath to regain the lost confidence before I finally begin my speech and loose myself in the words which just start to flow past my lips.

"Um Hi everyone, so today is an inportant day for all of us which is graduation day. Thank all of you for coming here and supporting your child, finally receiving that diploma they worked so hard to achieve and hold in their hands. I would really love to thank my amazing friends who came along to give me the support I needed in this day, but there is one more person I would like to thank..." I let out a shaky exhale before I continue on. "I would love to thank my dear father who didnt have the fortune to be here today due to a very sensitive topic for many of us so to not make this too long I wont get into detail."

"He was my hero, the person I looked up to all my life and the best father you could ever ask for. I know he is looking down at all of us and is so proud of evey child inside of this building, even if its not his, he always made sure to include everyone in the smallest little things who to the average person wouldnt matter as much as it did to him. If youre somewhere here with us dad, I just have one last thing to say to you before they kick me off this stage for making this too long. I love you with all of my heart and dedicate this whole journey and diploma to you." raising the diploma in my hand into the air, small tears prick my eyes as the whole room breaks into cheers and everyone applauding me and I havent felt better in my life.

I step off the stage and reunite with my friends, passing through the crowded area before I immediately fall into Chris's open arms. Everyone joining the hug and continuing to praise my beautiful speech with all kinds of kind words that just go straught to my heart as if taking it into warm arms and never pulling away. "That was absolutely amazing, like im shocked by how heart-spoken those words were" I hear Nick state in a proud tone with a slight undertone of joking to lighten up the mood as the rest of the others chime in with their own words as we all pull away from each other. "Girl we are so proud of you." Larray speaks up louder than the others and pulls me into a seperate hug of his own, soon everyone else follows behind now with Chris being left for last.

Without hesitation he grabs ahold of my waist and pulls me into his chest, his face burying into my hair and inhaling the sweet scent left behind from my shampoo i've used this morning. I nuzzle my face into his chest and breathe in the scent of his cologne I always love smelling, its my favorite out of all of the previous ones he had in the past. "I am so proud of you, sweetheart. You totally nailed it at making the whole room cry, including us." He admits while speaking against my hair, a soft chuckle following suite which also makes me chuckle as well as the others around us, we stand in each others arms fir a few more minutes before finally pulling away.

"Now its time for celebratory dinner!" Matt cheers as the group chuckles at his enthusiasm, we wait for the whole ceremony go come to an end and everyone will be allowed to go home before we make our way out of the building alongside all of the others. All of us split and go out separate ways to get ready for the dinner, I don’t know what to expect since they didn’t tell me much besides the fact we’re going to a dinner at some kind of restaurant after my graduation but they informed me before-hand to dress up elegant so my mind started to assume the different places we could go dine at.

! -- boom boom -- !

I relax under the hot water spraying onto my body from the shower head secured to the marble wall, there’s about an hour before they will be knocking at my door to pick me up. Still, I take my sweet time with my shower as it washes all of the stress and nervousness away in the form of hot water droplets dripping from my nude body. Switching off the shower and stepping out of the shower I wrap a fluffy tower around my torso, absorbing the water that was left behind on my skin as I scout around the room, finishing up the business I needed to get done in the bathroom before I leave my towel to dry and walk out of the bathroom.

My eyes land on the black asymmetrical dress lying down on my bed that Chris gifted me not so long ago, now got me guessing if he was planning this before-hand. Alongside with a white pearly necklace with matching earrings that was also a gift but a bit of an old one now coming from my father before he passed away, I still kept the suicide letter he left for me and put them on top of it so I am reminded of how valuable this gift actually is each time I put them on. Now lastly a silver watch with two rings - 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐟𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐤 https://pin.it/2tcBbHAtN

I’ve precisely lied down my outfit to get a visual of it, expecting I would use most of my time in the showerWalking over to imy wardrobe I pick out a fresh parei of underwear with a bra to matcabd a bra, quickly slipping both ite,s onto my body before now moving onto the official outfit. I havent had the dress on yet since I didnt really have a specific reason to put it on but today its a special day and that calls for a special outfit, the dress fits my body like a glove and is tight in all of the right places. walking to stand infront of my full-body mirror I become immediately obsessed with how it looks on me, and quite surprised on how did Chris pick out thus dress possibly all by himself? maybe i underestimaded his knowledge about me all along.

I complete the whole outfit with putting on the rest of the accesories before moving on to my shoes, I've got there old red-bottom heels from my mother which she gave to me for a 'special date with a special someone' but I already know what she was implying and I wasnt so much against it. the idea. I put them on and now go to the next step, makeup. I step back inside my bathroom and start on my makeup, in the same time thinking of what I could possibly do with my hair and in what style I can style it today, especially for my graduation dinner. For some reason I feel like I need to look my best no matter what, so I really take my time whit perfecting my makeup and deciding to do a basic blow-out with my hair once again making sure everything is in place.

Moving onto the final finishing touches, spraying my favorite perfume on my pulse points where it will ill give off the mossmot scent. i check the time on my watch and realize I dont have hvae much time left so I quickly get out of the bathroom, disconnecting my phone from the charger in my bedroom and drop it into my purse which was laying down next to it. With a rush in my move and few minutes to spair before expected knocks on my door, I take some pictures in the the mirror to appreciate how I look tonight. I basically dart to my door as the 'were waiting in the car outside' pop up on my phone screen and revealing the cute wallpaper I have of a photo with Chris, I admire it for a second before moving onto the tast at hand. Exiting the building I see Matt's car waiting outside with everyone inside but with just enough room left for me, they all great me with simple hi’s and hello's but the tone of their voices changing the meaning of them, turning them into more heartfelt greetings. Matt turns the engine back on and we leave from under my apartment complex, chatter and small banters starting to rise in the air of the car.

! -- boom boom -- !

We pull up into a parking lot of a very fancy restaurant and the building from the outside looks already amazing, we all step out of the car. Chris quickly walks up to my side of the car and grabbing my hand, helping me get out of the car. I chuckle with the rest of the group who witnessed it, as all of us are out of the car we make our way up to the front entrance. Nick turns to look at me walking with Chris in the back, "We hope you like it here, it legit took us a month to get a resarvation here." he states with an uplifting tone to his voice, silently appreciating all of the good energy and how they took the time out of their day to scheduel this is so heartwarming to me. "This place looks absolutely amazing, I dont know how you guys did it." I admit, admiring the outside in awe at how it looks in the night with all of the lights turned on, the slight dribble of the waterfountain outside is heard in the background as we finally enter the restaurant.

One of Chris's hands is resting on the small of my back, a warm fuzzy feeling lingering behind it each time he takes it off. I notice for some reason all of the others whenever see our closeness with each other today, it seems like they know something I dont and I'm just itching to ask and admit Ive noticed it but I bite my tongue back and dont say a word about it. Observing the interior design inside, we sign in for our reservation and a polite lady walks us to our table. All of us sit down and have the menu already infront of us, picking it up and flipping through the pages to find something I might enjoy here since I’ve never eaten here before so it will be good for me to try something new from time to time.

I glance around the restaurant, still admiring all of the guests nicely dressed in suits and dressed of all sorts and the interior just screaming luxury and money in general. Ots not my first time seeing luxury in my life but by the looks of the restaurant you cant tell someone has taste in interior design. My eyes go back down onto the menu and come to a desicion on what I should try here, soon the waiter approaches us and takes everyones order before walking away. The table errupts into chatter, some banter and laughter being thrown around evetywhere, positive energy flowing through the air and rising the atmosphere. Everything was perfect so far, amazing even, sjtting at a restaurant with all of my friends I deeply care for while having fun at the same time is such an amazing feeling to have inside of you and hope the others are experiencing it as well.

Before we get the grasp of the time flying by, soon our food arrives and everyone goes in. Tasting the various flavors and textures delivered in the meal, the sounds of satisfaction fill the air as all of us consume our prepared meals while chatting in between. We’ve been in the restaurant for quite awhile now and our stay is soon going to come to an end as we finish our meals then wait for our check to arrive, as we wait I notice the groups eyes shifting from me to Chris and confusion clouds my mind as of what’s to come next and it is nothing I’ve could have ever expected. Chris also places his eyes on me, me now realizing he has something hidden behind his hands and my curiosity rising almost instantly, the others whispering and giggling to each other while I remain oblivious.

Suddenly he stands up from his seat and walks over closer to where I currently reside in my seat, his hand reaches out in a gesture for me to take his hands and i oblige. Softly placing my hand in the palm of his, feeling the warmth of it envelop my own as he makes me also stand up and rise to my feet, his other hand remains hiding the mysterious object behind the enclosure of his fingers trapping it inside. The exact hand comes into view to finally reveal what is the surprise. “You’ve been through so much, yet you’ve managed to pull through it all. Since you graduated with such success, I just had to get you something personally to congratulate my favorite girl finally getting what she worked so hard for.” He confesses before taking his hand away and revealing a small white box, I grab the box and open to find what’s inside. My eyes are met with a stunning diamond ring which shines in the soft glow of the chandelier in the room.

I stare in complete shock and awe, not knowing how to react nor what move I could possibly do to safe the awkward silence. Before I get to wrap my head around any kind of ideas, he lifts my head by grabbing ahold of my chin to look back at him, smiling at my expression. “But there’s one last thing to do…” He speaks again, his eyes darting between looking into my eyes or staring at my lips. “What do you me-“ before I could finish my sentence as well as not getting that much time I needed to think of any possible meanings he meant behind his words, he pulls my face towards his and smashes our lips together in a searing kiss. I could feel the other tables glancing at us but frankly I didn’t care right now, becoming lost in the sensation of his lips on mine.

I melt right into the kiss as my arms fall around his neck, pulling him down closer to me as his arms attach to my waist. Never did I think I would be kissing my best friend in the middle of a restaurant, our friends start to erupt in cheers and the other tables starting to join the moment. After a few minutes passing of the kiss, we pull away from each other and I chuckle at the remains of my lipstick now left on his. “I love you, I really do.” the words leave my lips first as I see the smile widening in both of our faces, our breaths mixing together with each other by the close proximity of our faces in the moment.

“Even if I was a worm?” He jokes, lighting up the tense and intimate mood surrounding us, I giggle at him trying to squeeze in a joke in almost every situation he gets the chance to. “You’re so fucking stupid, it’s starting to get cute” “Yeah maybe, but I’m your stupid, am I?” I roll my eyes playfully, knowing what he’s saying is completely true before pulling him back into another kiss. The others cheers slowly fading into the background and the only thing I could hear was the flowing thoughts and pictures of this moment, everything around us becomes irrelevant as both of our minds get lost in the immaculate chemistry coursing through our bodies.

@hearts4werka

authors note: after working on this for quite some time now, a few crying nights while listening to cas to be exact, I finally finished writing this request that literally was such a good idea. I loved writing the story and it is kinda more story in general in here but overall this was such a fun thing to write. I hope y’all enjoy this kinda change of pace, luv y’all so much

& love and peace, V

Guestlist!

| @sturnioloblues - @sturnsxplr-25 - @deffonotjae - @strnzzvsp - @luvvs4chriss - @sturniolosweetheart33 - @pussypie456 - @choclatestarfishwithahat - @venusxsturnio - @bagsbyclair0 - @sturnstvs - @dykes4chris - @hoe4matt - @cayleeuhithinknot |

Reblogs, likes and comments are deeply appreciated!

[burntb4bydoll]

Tom Kaulitz x inexperienced!fem!reader

Warnings: a bit of scratching, hair pulling, slight size kink, PRAISE KINK, readers lowkey bratty and a crybaby💀, very soft dom Tom🤭 like fr tho hes WHIPPED.

“Please Tom! I just wanna try. You’re so mean!” You pout, furrowing your eyebrows at Tom. He sighs and grabs your chin with his thumb and pointer finger,

“Baby, thats enough. You’re not ready yet. You have no idea what you’re doing. We gotta work up to it.” That only made you pout harder. Whining, you climb on top of him to straddle his waist. You two were already undressed because you had already been messing around before you started to throw a little tantrum. You lean down to kiss him, moving your hips to grind your body into his. Toms breath hitched as he felt your wetness spreading over his length. (Im sorry physically can not type any other word for it. They all sound so gross)

“Look, Tommy. I can make you feel good,” you sigh, “Just please let me fuck you! Ill be such a good girl!” You sit back up, inspecting his facial expressions. He grabs your hips and sits up against the headboard so that you are sitting in his lap.

“Fuck. Ok fine, but I’m gonna help you. And thats not an option. Its not gonna be easy, sweetheart. Especially for someone who has no idea what to do.” You rolled your eyes at him. What could be so difficult about it? Hes over exaggerating. Tom sees your eye roll and gently grabs you by your hair, which was so gentle that he was basically just holding you by the back of your head. “what did I say about that attitude? You wont get fucked at all if you keep it up. You know I don’t wanna do that to you, baby.” Toms voice was soft as he looked at you with pure love in his eyes. You knew he wouldn’t actually do that, you’ve got him wrapped around your finger. But you decide to play along anyways.

“Sorry, Tommy. I’ll be good, promise.” You both know thats probably a lie, but he accepts it anyways. He lifts up your hips to position himself at your entrance, watching you the whole time to make sure you were okay. You slowly sink down on him, moaning at the new feeling. You didn’t think it was possible to feel him this deep inside of you. “Tom-! Oh my god, you’re so deep!” He shushes you, moving your hair out of the way so he had access to your neck. As he trailed kisses across your jaw, you had finally got him all the way inside.

“Good job, princess. Just sit still for a minute. That was a lot, huh?” He pulls away and smiles as he plays with your hair.

“Mhm… fuck. Ive never felt like this before. It’s weird.” You moan, looking down to see the outline of his dick (💀) showing on your lower stomach. He moves his hand down to press in it, making you whine and jolt from the pressure.

“God, you are so pretty. Look at this. You can actually see how deep I go.” Tom was absolutely mesmerized. He only looked away when you started to lightly bounce on him. Groaning, he holds your hips tightly. You started moving a little faster, grabbing him by his hair to steady yourself. His nails dug into your skin, leaving crescent shapes on your hips.

“There you go. Good girl~ you’re doing such a good job.” Tom coos. Your eyes feel heavy and tears of pleasure start to form in your eyes. Toms praising always gets you so worked up. After riding him for a while your legs start to burn. After your failed attempt to continue fucking your boyfriend, you collapsed onto his shoulder.

“I wanna keep going- its just…my legs hurt. Can you help me? Please, Tom. I need you to help me..” Your words are breathy and desperate, basically crying for him. Tom silences your pleas by kissing you. While you kiss he starts to thrust up into you, moving your hips for you to match his thrusts. He moans loudly at the change of pace, feeling himself grow closer to finishing. One of his hands leaves your hip to toy with your clit, causing you to whimper and shake.

“Come on, baby. Cum with me…I wanna feel that pretty cunt cum for me.” Both of you gasp as you reach your highs, hands gripping on to each other desperately. He makes sure to continue his movements on your clit so that you could ride out your orgasm for as long as possible. “Good girl, such a good girl. You take me so well” Tom mumbles as his movements come to a stop. A silence fell over the room as you calmed down, but it was quickly ruined by your giggles

“I told you I could do it! And most of it was by myself!” You state proudly, making him laugh at you.

[bruisedboys]

STAR TRIPPING, blurbs ─── send in a character + a prompt from the lists above and I’ll write you a blurb!

could do you do a fluff blurb with miguel o'hara for~

❛ was that your first kiss? ❜

❛ do you think i’m a good person? ❜

❛ what if i hurt you? ❜

ive never really requested anything and i don't if that's too many prompts, so very sorry, ignore this if it's too much !! <3

hi angel!! thank you so much for the ask. I just used one of these prompts, I hope you don’t mind! 🤍

SPOILERS FOR SPIDERMAN: ATSV BELOW THE CUT!

miguel o’hara x spider-person!reader, no pronouns used, fluff and a tiny bit of angst!

prompt — ❛ do you think i’m a good person? ❜

Miguel isn’t used to feeling judged. He doesn’t care what other people think, especially when most people who don’t like him are much younger and much more inexperienced, in his opinion (Read: Hobie Brown).

But with you around it’s different. He feels like he needs to be better. Kinder, maybe. He’s not exactly sure why. Or rather, he knows exactly why but doesn’t want to admit it.

You’re kind, you’re really kind, probably the sweetest most selfless spider-person he’s ever had to deal with. And he’s dealt with a lot. Miguel likes how kind you are. At first it sort of stopped him in his tracks, threw him for a loop. Now that he’s known you for a while he’s found himself acting differently, being more forgiving of mistakes, letting things go that he usually wouldn’t. He’d never admit it out loud, but he knows it’s because he likes you. And, more importantly, he wants you to like him.

Still, he messes up sometimes. A mission to catch a Vulture variant turns messy when the Spider-Woman from the dimension he’d landed in gets stuck in a problem she can’t get out of. Gwen Stacy — she’s young, and she’s on her own, and she’s lost. Miguel is hesitant to let her on. He’s more rude to her than he should be. Snarky, mean. But in the end he lets her come, because what kind of person would he be if he left her there alone?

When he gets back he doesn’t mean to seek you out but finds you anyway. You’re in his office, of all places. He stands in the doorway feeling awful, feeling like you’d hate him for how he treated Gwen today. After a while he clears his throat though he doesn’t have to, you probably already know he’s there, what with your spider-senses and all.

You turn from your seat and smile at him. “You’re back. How did it go?”

Miguel doesn’t smile though he’d like to if he could. You’re the only one who can ever get a smile out of him. “Good. Everything’s taken care of.”

“Heard you picked up a new recruit,” you say with a little lilt to your voice. You’re always excited for new recruits. Quite the opposite of Miguel, really.

Miguel nods. The topic of Gwen makes him feel nauseous. Why did he have to be such a jerk to her? “We did. Gwen Stacy, she’s in the med bay right now.”

Your brow furrows. “Is she okay?”

“She’s fine. Just a little scratched up.”

You nod. “Well, you probably want your office back,” you say softly, gesturing to the desk you’ve been occupying in place of him. “I’ll go.”

You get up and walk past him and Miguel almost lets you go but doesn’t. He calls your name before you make it out the door.

“Y/N?”

His voice comes out more strained than he’d meant it to sound. You don’t say anything but when he turns you’re looking at him with a worry to your pretty features. Miguel figures he must look quite troubled because you actually take a step forwards and put your hand on his forearm, so gentle it’s barely there, but it’s there, and it’s feels like dead weight to Miguel.

“Yeah?”

Miguel bites the bullet and asks the question he’s been asking himself for a long time. “Do you think I’m a good person?”

You blink at him. You’re silent for a beat. Then, “What’s making you ask that?”

Your hand drifts up his forearm and comes to rest at his elbow, your grip tightening ever so slightly. Miguel’s eyelids flutter lazily at your touch.

“I’m short with people,” is all he can manage to say in way of an explanation.

“You’ve got a stressful job,” you say reasonably. “It’s only human.”

“I was short with Gwen,” Miguel explains, finding the longer you touch him, the more he unravels. He stares at a point over your shoulder, “She didn’t deserve it.”

“Oh,” is all you say.

Miguel thinks his heart might drop out of his chest. Maybe it will and then he’ll keel over and die and never have to worry about what you think of him again. Unlikely. He’s never been that lucky.

He doesn’t realise how heavy the silence feels until you break it.

“Miguel? Can you look at me?”

Miguel looks at you. You’re pretty as ever. He’s always thought you were pretty, but now it feels suffocating. Like, if he doesn’t tell you soon, he’ll die.

“You’re not a bad person,” you say. “You’re good. You are. Everyone gets a little impatient sometimes.”

“You don’t,” Miguel says, because you don’t. He doesn’t think he’s ever heard you get angry or upset with someone.

“That is so not true,” you say, shaking your head. “Ask Peter B, the other day I blew up at him for leaving Mayday’s toys all over the place.”

Miguel fights a smile. He can’t imagine you ever ‘blowing up’. “This is different, Y/N. You know what I mean.”

“I do know what you mean,” you say, your hand squeezing ever so slightly at his elbow. “And yeah, you have a short temper sometimes but that doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. What you’re doing here is good. You’re a good person, Miguel.”

You smile then, like you mean it, and Miguel knows you do. If he’d heard it from anyone else, he wouldn’t have believed them. But from you it feels real. He knows you wouldn’t lie to him, even if it was to make him feel better. You might be kind but you’re not dishonest. Yet another reason why Miguel likes you so much.

“Thank you,” he says. “You’re—“ He stops himself before he can say anything too serious, changes tactics though what he comes up with instead is still very much true. “I value your opinion more than you’d think. It’s important to me.” You’re important to me.

Miguel shifts his arm so he can take your hand in his. It’s bold. It’s unlike him. But it feels nice and your hand is soft in his and he hopes it will say what he can’t. He only holds your hand for a second before dropping it but it feels like an eternity.

“That’s okay,” you say sweetly. “Your opinion is important to me, too.”

Then, and Miguel is familiar with this by now, you get this look on your face like you’re going to make a joke, one that’s bad but will probably make him smile anyway. “If you still feel bad, you can always go and apologise to her,” you say, a cheek to your tone that Miguel adores more than he’d ever admit.

Miguel groans. You both know he’d never stoop that low. He smiles for the first time in what feels like forever.

“Would you do it for me?” He asks in a strained sort of voice, half joking and half serious.

You burst into giggles. Miguel feels his heart soar.

[jujumin-translates]

★ Main Story | Act 13 - Budding Spring | Chapter 1 - New Prologue

Towa: (So this is Veludo Station~. It’s smaller than I thought it’d be. The exit should be this way…)

Towa: (Umm, the map app says…)

Towa: Yeah, over there.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Towa: So this is Veludo Way…

Towa: (This is the heartland of theater, the place with the highest concentration of theaters in all of Japan… all kinds of theater companies, both large and small, are based here.)

Towa: (I’ve only ever seen it in videos, but there really is theater no matter where you look.)

Towa: (It’s amazing that theater continues all the way down the street.)

Towa: And just beyond that is where… the Holy Land…!

Towa: Calm down, calm down. Okay.

*Camera clicks*

Towa: (I’ll let the guys know…)

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

momo has entered the chat.

momo: At Veludo Way rn

Iv: congratsss. haven’t seen where you are rn in a hot minute lol shiki: That’s Veludo Way? Kar: AI detected momo: But it’s legit! Kar: Kinda blurry tho shiki: Congrats on your long-awaited pilgrimage to the Holy Land! Happy for you! momo: Haven’t gotten to the Holy Land yet. Gotta calm down first Iv: lol you’ve gone all that way and still haven’t done that? momo: It’s called the Holy Land because it’s a sacred place that you can’t just wander into, so it’d be impolite to be too careless about it Kar: What’s with the sudden essay lmao Iv: bestie’s trying to hit the nerd count shiki: You’ve been working hard all this time to get to the Holy Land, so you should enjoy it to the fullest. momo: I’ll do that!

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

*Bump*

Towa: !?

???: “--Gh.”

Towa: Huh…

Towa: (He’s crouching down? I wonder if he’s okay… is it my fault for bumping into him…?)

???: “The hell are you doing?”

Towa: (Huh? That voice, I think I’ve heard it before…)

???: “C’mon, let me give you a hand.”

Towa: …G-GOD-za’s Haruto Asuka and Shift Arakawa!?

Shift: “It’s no use~... I can’t walk~...”

Haruto: “You drank too much.”

Shift: “My life’s a mess… I can’t even take another step forward…”

Haruto: “Quit overreacting just because you two broke up!”

Towa: (Ah, could it be… this is Veludo Way’s specialty…)

Shift: “I’m not overreacting! I’m always stuck playing a supporting role. At best, I’m just here to be used. I’ll never have a starring role!”

Shift: “If I keep living like this, I’ll just be stuck as a supporting role in someone else’s life.”

Shift: “What’s even the point of living like this…?”

Haruto: “Then live your own life, not someone else’s. The reason you can’t do that is because you put others at the center as the starring role.”

Haruto: “You’re the leading role in your own life. You’re the one who gets to decide what kind of life you live.”

Shift: “I’m the starring role in my own life…”

Towa: (I can’t believe they can do theater like this without a script…)

Towa: (I’ve only ever seen videos of street acts, but they were doing it so naturally. Amazing…)

Haruto: Thank you very much~!

Towa: --.

Shift: Past GOD-za performances are streaming until tomorrow! It’s only for a limited time, so don’t miss out!

*Applause*

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Towa: (It was way too lucky of me to be able to see a street act done by GOD-za’s top two here…!)

Shift: Ah, sorry for bumpin’ into ya before.

Towa: !! No! Don’t worry about it!

Shift: See ya.

Haruto: Thanks for watching us~.

*Footsteps*

Towa: Haaah~... I should’ve taken a video…

Towa: (Veludo Way really is the place to see street acts done by a whole bunch of different theater companies.)

Towa: (Maybe I’ll see them too…)

Towa: (No way, it’d be impossible to have that kind of crazy luck two times in a row, but, but, what if I really did meet my oshi…)

Towa: --.

*Paper rustling*

Towa: (It’s something that’s way too good to ever actually happen, but I’ve decided that in the unlikely event that I do meet him, I’m going to make sure I get him to autograph this.)

Towa: (My most treasured possession…)

Towa: Ah, wait, did I bring a pen to get his autograph…

Towa: (Huh, I don’t have it. Did I seriously forget it~?)

*Wind blows*

Towa: Ah--!

*Paper falls to the ground*

???: …?

[ Next Part ⇢ ]

[08melancholie]

(Just a warning, non-con is mentioned in this but I’m not talking about it in a graphic way)

I wanna yap, and you’re the only person I know who will most likely agree with me, so get ready

Okay so I wanna talk about how people use that news paper clipping (will add it below)

If you can’t read it, the basic summary is Micah and his father killed a farmer and his wife. Micah the second(I’ll just call him Micah the second) was 38 and Micah was 17 years old, from what we know from the game and Micah literally saying it himself that his father was a bad man, and we have no idea what his mother was like, maybe she was mistreated by his father, Left or was bad too. Anyways back to the original conversation is that no 17 year old is gonna kill someone without being influenced to do it, obviously Micah the third was pressured by his father to kill people. He says it himself, “my daddy said sympathy is for the weak” so his father most likely groomed him into crime (or whatever word you use for that) and his brother Amos luckily got away from that mess and started a family. It’s obvious that Micah the third was influenced by his father.

off topic I wanna talk about his relationship with his brother

Micah brother doesn’t exactly hate him, and something I wanna talk about is that Micah is atheist and Amos is Christian, Amos had the chance to change from being a outlaw but Micah didn’t because his brother didn’t want Micah near him anymore. So Micah continued on the outlaw path, I wish we knew more about the bell family.

And last but not least, I wanna talk about some of the narcissistic people in the fandom and how stupid they sound.

“Micah is a grapist” The thing is, we don’t know that and nobody in the fandom knows that he is or isn’t, it’s not confirmed and it’s a theory. Also we don’t know if he actually did it with Jenny, he could’ve been lying just to gain attention and we don’t know if it was non-con or not. “His looks give off pervert vibes” that’s a bit odd to say considering his actor looks like him? It’s really rude to say too, it’s kinda sad how Peter got death threats and people say “That’s how you know he plays good as a villain” that’s how you know people are too sensitive to be playing a game about outlaws

Yet again, they don’t call out any other characters for it? Like Dutch, bill, and Javier and harass people for liking Micah.

“Micah’s racist and you support his actions!” That’s the way Micah was brought up, although it’s still wrong and nobody supports it. Do they support Arthur killing people? No I don’t think they do

Sorry gang I had to yap

OKAY WOW THERES A LOT TO UNPACK HERE lets do it

more after the cut <3

Firstly, I do absolutely agree on Micah's upbringing. I have a brief post on it already ("Upbringing.") and I very much think that his dad set him up for failure very early on, giving him no chance to pick his path himself.

Amos and Micah were both influenced by their father as all three did crimes together, but Amos was lucky enough to get himself out of it, while Micah sadly couldn't. That's the very reason I think Micah ended up killing his own father; never having a chance to choose his own path.

Now, I don't blame Amos for disliking Micah, but I wish there was just a little sympathy he had for his brother, because he himself was in Micah's shoes for a good portion of both of their lives.

Unrelated: I find it very interesting Amos is the only on here that has his own name, and isn't Micah IV or something. Do you think this also influenced something between the two of them, that made them more distant? I know I would be pissed if my brother got his own name, while I had to continue family tradition. Just a thought.

Now, the Jenny Kirk situation is very tricky; we don't get much information about it. All he really says is that he 'had her', said she was a 'dirty little thing', how he felt for Lenny because he 'got her before he could', and last how she 'might have been carry Micah IV.', but that's really it.

We don't get anything else from Micah about it, or in the game in general. That really means it's left for interpretation of the fandom, which we know most will say that it was a non-con situation. Now—maybe a little controversial—I don't think that he necessarily assaulted her. I mean, he isn't ugly to everyone. Let's talk camp interactions; he fake-flirts with Susan Grimshaw, who plays into it. Would she be doing that if she thought him unattractive? I don't think so. Then again, I do wish we had some confirmation on this, like with other characters (Colm, Dutch etc.)

While on topic of that, I want to mention another thing. Whether or whether not Micah is a rapist, I think the fact that Dutch is confirmed to be one in RDR1 is just wayyy too overlooked, while everyone makes their speculations and accusations on Micah through a singular interaction with him. In RDR1, when Dutch is being described, one of the names is 'rapist' and I wish that more people talked about that, and not so much Micah's that isn't even hinted at to be an assault. But, to each their own.

Small edit: This was still wrong of Micah, considering Jenny's age. It's not exactly known, but she was very young (17-21) and absolutely out of his age range. Even if consensual between the two of them, it was very prominent that she was way too young to have sex with him, and that's on him as the older one in the situation.

Peter Blomquist getting sent threats was proof he could play an amazing villain, and it makes me pretty sad to think people don't know how to separate the character from his actor. It was pretty immature to send him literal threats, and I still sometimes see comments on his instagram, which is just insane. It's been years, and we still act this immature?

As far as Micah's racism comments go, the root is most likely also his father. But, I can't much excuse him there because I myself grew up around some very vulgar language about people of color. Not to forget, with me being Croatian, I was around when people still talked ill of Serbs because of the war. But, even as a very impressionable kid, I was able to grow myself out of it. I never spoke ill of Serbs or people of color. (Briefly while I was still around 12, but I feel that can be overlooked.) I think it's possible to change your views, and this is one of the few things where I can't much find a way to defend Micah, but I'll take into consideration his upbringing and the fact that during the Western times, a heap of people were practically all racist.

They may see themselves as vigilantes, but everyone in the gang is a bad person, that has done/is doing bad things. Micah is a bit more ruthless, that much I'll admit. But again, another ideal of his fathers and how he was brought up. "My daddy always said, sympathy is for the weak." He says even more lines like these, spreading his fathers' bad teachings because that's what he knows. But, I do find it very intriguing that he still spreads his fathers' word, even after killing him himself. Oh, Micah; my fellow daddy-issue-haver.

Yapping session completed chat, also good morning!!! I just woke up and saw this long ass ask and immediately rose to my feet. I love yapping with you guys <3

[lesbianloml]

Ur looking for ideas? IM STARVING anyways ur writing is amazing ily boo<3

It’s actually a post of mine but I’ll go more into detail for you

Mommy!wanda finally letting reader top and use a strap on her for once, r being so excited to fuck wanda they start at a bruising pace needing wanda to guide them and show them how to make her feel good, once r gets a hang of it the friction of the strap on them plus Wanda’s moans and praise is too good making it hard for them to stop and pushing them into subspace, which ends up overstimulating both r and wanda, imagine wanda having to calm down r, cupping their face and telling them to breathe and that they’re doing so good for her, “you’ve made mommy feel so good baby, it’s okay calm down pup” and r just whining, hiding into her neck, barely able to from words anymore just mumbling “too good, I don’t wanna stop, hurts” but they keep going until r just physically can’t move anymore and they’re both a mess by the end of it🤭

(Ive lost all my shame٫ help)

In and Out

Type of piece(s): imagine, oneshot, drabble, series

Type(s) of writing: smut, angst, fluff, dark

Pairing(s): emo!soft!dom!wanda x sub!fem!reader (I hope everyone reading this knows the difference between top/bottom and dom/sub)

Warning(s): praise kink, use of strap, overstimulation, tummy bulge

Summary: Mommy finally let's Reader be on top. (Mostly) Reader does pretty good. A little too good.

A/N: I would love to write this request! Thanks for being my first writing ask! Hope you like it! Enjoy!

"Hey, Wanda?" "Not my name, detka." Wanda responded, not looking up from her book. "Mommy?" "Yes, sweetheart?" "Can I be on top today?" You asked, sweet as can be. Wanda sat and didn't respond for a minute. "I guess that would be ok. Let's go." Wanda said, standing up and holding her hand out so you could slip yours in. As Wanda walked into the bedroom, she layed on the bed after taking her clothes off. "You know where the toys are, don't you honey?" "Yes, Mommy." You say.

You stripped as you walked to the drawer and opened it. You decided to get her back for all the times she did this to you. You picked out a very large strap with a little piece that would move in circles on your clit while you thrust. Then, you pulled out a blindfold. Just in case. You walk over to her and she sees the strap. Her eyes widen a bit but she doesn't say anything. She wants you to feel like you're in control, even if its only for one night. You put the harness on and groan as you feel a little pressure on your clit. It was tight enough that it squeezed and put pressure on your clit every time you moved. You didn't want to know how it would feel when your start to thrust.

You straddle her waist, gasping a bit as it rubs at your clit. You sit there for a moment staring at her pretty pussy thinking about how you've never done this before and you don't know how to please her. "Malyshka?" "Yes, Mommy?" "Do you need help?" "Yes please." "So you go like this." She said, pulling you to straddle her lap. You lifted your hips up and started to sink down, moaning as the toy rubbed and squeezed your clit. As you got a little more than halfway, you saw a bulge appear in Wanda's stomach. Wanda was groaning as she saw the bulge. As you kept going down, she began to whimper. You had never seen Wanda like this. Whimpering. She usually looked so composed.

You continued bouncing and as Wanda was moaning and praising you as she came for the second time, you also came. But as you came, moaning loudly, you drifted into subspace. But you just kept thrusting in and out, in and out. You had no thoughts in your head at all, just the pleasure you felt. Wanda and you had both came 6 times before Wanda cupped your face. "Sh sh sh. You've made Mommy feel so good pup! You did so good. Just breathe. Take a breath." But you just buried your head in her shoulder, whining and whimpering as you continued to circle your hips, thrusting in and out. "So good. Don't wanna stop. Hurts! Hurts so good." You whimpered into her ear.

Wanda just didn't have the heart to stop you. You and Wanda both came twice more before you physically couldn't move anymore. You looked down at Wanda. She was panting, moaning, covered in a sheet of sweat and looked like an absolute wreck. Little did you know, you mirrored her looks. As you and Wanda limped over to take a shower together, Wanda stared at you, amazed. Without even meaning to, you had ruined both yourself and her.

Thanks for reading! Keep those requests flowing!

[sxtvrns]

publicly romantic

🎶 now playing: in my heart (demo) - grentperez

P: Lee Felix x Fem!Reader

S: He fell first, and he fell hard. When you were on the big screen behind him, he knew he fell for you even more.

W: fluff, drabble because im in my kpop era now, no knowledge of skz at all, short

N: if im being honest guys the only reason i decided to write this was because i got inspired by those fan dance things during their world tour ive only ever listened to case 143 and i apologize if this makes me an outsider but i thought this was cute okay enjoy the content

please interact if you enjoy!

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When your boyfriend said he was going on a world tour, you did not think it was going to last for nearly an entire year. JYP better give them a break after this.

Dating Felix was a handful. He was always busy and his schedule was packed, you both were travelling constantly, having a home in Sydney and in Seoul. With the tour on his hands as well, it didn’t make it any easier. You saw all the edits of him flooding the internet, all of them reminding you of how much you missed your boyfriend.

So when you were told he was going to Australia, and you were conveniently going to be there at the same time as his concert, you had your fingers crossed you could get tickets. You didn’t care if you were in the pit or in the nosebleeds; you were happy to even be in the same room as him for a little while, even if you had to admire him from afar.

You texted him and called him as much as you could. Whenever your phone rang, you always assumed he was on a break or had free time, knowing that it probably meant the rest of the day was full of work. The amount of people that love him reminds you of how lucky you are to have such a handsome guy who seems so out of reach be your boyfriend.

Things weren’t kept secret for long. When you visited Felix one time, he forgot he was live, saying your name and three forbidden words out loud and straight to the camera: I love you. You never showed your face that live, your hand merely waving hello. It wasn’t until you left the room that both of you had realized what he’d done.

You came into his room after he finished his live, putting his phone away. “What the fuck did you do.” You say, more of a statement rather than a question. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to– it just slipped out!”

“If I knew you were going live, I wouldn’t have come. You slip up easily whenever I’m around.”

“That’s because I love you. And that’s also exactly why I didn’t tell you because I wanted to see you.”

You pace around the room, panicking. “JYP’s gonna kill us. He’s gonna kill you. Your fans are gonna come and kill me!”

“He already knows.”

“What do you mean, ‘he knows’?”

“Chan accidentally ran his mouth. If anything, you wouldn’t be in my room right now if JYP forced me to break up with you. He just told me to be careful… and I do. Ever since we started dating, I’ve been careful.” He sighs, setting his phone down and walking up to you. “I’m sorry. I… you can stay here for a few days if you’re too scared to go outside.”

He knew that people could find what you look like and all your other information with a mere search of your name. This wasn’t the same as other people knowing who his sisters were. Him getting into a dating scandal would jeopardize your safety and his group. He didn’t care about his group at the moment, he was scared for you.

“I… I’d like that, actually. I hope you don’t mind.”

“I assume that means you don’t mind sharing a bed? Unless you want me to sleep on the floor.”

“You really think I want you to sleep on the floor after the amount of time we’ve been apart?” Your response makes him smile, pressing a kiss to your forehead and pulling you in for a hug, his hand caressing the top of your head. “I’m really sorry. I know I messed up. And I’m sorry I can’t be there for you all the time.”

“I know. It’s okay. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough. I know you’re working hard and you’re busy. But… I’m hoping we can still try to enjoy ourselves for the time being.”

He pulls away to look at your face, being confused about your sudden switch up.

“Yes, I’m scared, yes, my life is probably going to be in danger at some point, but I did not come to see you just to worry about this and our relationship going public. It’s out there now, and there’s nothing we can do about it. I know I was panicking about it a few seconds ago, but I’ve come to terms that it happened already. I forgive you. And honestly, I’m glad that you’re that comfortable with me to say it in front of thousands of people.”

“I’m sorry–“

“You’ve apologized enough. It’s okay now.” You cut him off, going onto your tip toes to kiss his nose. “Can we order something? I’m hungry.”

“You didn’t think of doing that before my live ended?”

“I was gonna ask you, but I felt I intruded already.”

After that whole fiasco, people found your social media accounts, some of them even following you, flooding your comments with nothing but sentences that had the name Felix in it at least once. You got a few death threats even, but you tried to not let it get to you too much. It made you a bit paranoid, but the more you went out, the more you forgot about them.

Articles were written; Tiktoks and edits took over your feed about the ‘mystery girl’ or ‘Y/N’ behind the camera that gave Felix heart eyes whenever he looked at you. Eventually, they found out what you looked like, and though you were expecting insults, you were instead given compliments.

Pretty, adorable, beautiful… words that made you feel comfortable to be a part of Felix’s life publicly. He never brought it up during conversations or interviews unless another person did, which, he was very cautious with what he was saying.

You had your fair share of hate. It bothered you a little bit, but then remembered the only reason they hated you was that you had something they didn’t: Felix. His love and affection, his admiration and attention. It boosted your ego unhealthily, but you weren’t gonna get all full of yourself over it.

He wasn’t necessarily open about his relationship. He wouldn’t bring up the topic himself; usually someone else would have to. He would answer any questions, but there was always a limit to them. He was all nice about it though, always asking you after if what he said was okay to share with others.

“‘How’s Y/N?’ She’s good. She’s actually visiting, so I hope I’m not too loud.”

“‘How did you two meet?’ She does camerawork and paid us a visit, shadowing someone else. She always came along for a few shoots in a row, but I didn’t want to miss the opportunity so I just asked when no one was looking.”

“You wanna see her? She’s not too comfortable on camera, so I don’t think–“

“Felix, do you want this?”

You look at his tripod set up, then his surprised expression, as if he’d seen a ghost. “What’s wrong? Am I interrupting?”

“Nothing. What is that?”

“It’s a grilled cheese. I put the last of your gochujang in the butter.”

“Ah, thanks, we needed to get rid of it somehow.” You eye the camera. “Your face isn’t showing.” He clarifies, allowing you to walk into frame, letting him take a bite of the sandwich. His eyes light up, enthusiastically nodding. “It’s good!”

“Do you want it? I’ll make another one for myself.” He nods, taking the plate from you. “Thank you!” He says, mouth full as you walk out the door. “Look at this, guys. You guys summoned her, now I get good food.” He bites into it again, visibly enjoying the simple sandwich you made. “I love my girlfriend.”

The clip went viral. It’s now one of Felix’s iconic moments, and the first of your own.

You two were certainly romantic, private and in public. On the occasion you’d post photos of the two of you together, and you were also open about it if you were to do lives together. You weren’t in every live, but he invited you once and it was fun, so you were open to other opportunities.

You kept your hood on, which hid your face a bit well enough on camera.

“Y/N, what are we making?”

“Rose tteokbokki.”

“If you don’t know already, my girlfriend is an amazing cook and she gives me food sometimes during some of my other lives.”

“Then Felix makes brownies after and it’s a full meal.”

He notices your amount of clothing, greater than his. “Why are you wearing your hoodie? Is it not warm?”

“I’m hiding myself, I’m scared.”

“There’s nothing to be afraid of when you’re so pretty.”

“I cannot believe you’re flirting with me in front of over a hundred thousand people.”

“They deserve to know.”

His hand rests atop your head, his fingers gently gripping the hood. You let him take it off, fixing your hair right after. “Isn’t she pretty?” He shows you off to the camera before you hide your face in his chest.

You sat in an innocent little bubble tea shop, scrolling on your phone when you get a call from him unexpectedly. “Hello?” You greet, sipping on your drink. “Y/N, do you wanna come backstage after the concert? Feels like it’s been forever since I’ve last seen you.”

“Probably because it has. Can you really do that?”

“Chan’s parents and siblings are coming, and they’re going backstage, my sisters are coming too.”

“I mean, I’d like to, if it’s possible.”

He chuckles. “I’ll see you there.”

“Love you.”

There’s a brief pause, and you think about hanging up.

“Love you too.” He mutters, ending the call. It wasn’t very ‘professional’ of him to be calling his girlfriend when he should have been out there practicing, but he’s been kept from you long enough. He just couldn’t help himself.

And besides, he’d do anything for you.

As if it were a coincidence, it turned out you were sitting next to Hannah, who greeted you with a hug when she saw you sit down in the seat beside hers. Now you were sitting in your nosebleed seat, eagerly leaning forward to stare at the screen, the sudden random play dance coming on.

From your knowledge, a camera would focus on a certain fan in the audience, mostly in the further back, said fan having to follow one of the boy group’s dances. This would usually come on mid performance, meaning the members would be watching as well.

You’re so engaged staring at the screen, excited to see who’s on next that you don’t realize that it’s you. “Y/N!” Chan says, looking over at Felix. The choreography for God’s Menu begins to play as Hannah forces you up onto your feet, cheering you on.

You hand her your lightstick and place your bag down, forcing yourself to get over it and just do the dance for the few seconds you’re on screen. In your opinion, you did pretty well, judging from the screams that erupted from every inch of the room. You do the ending fairy, leaning against the railing again with a hand under your chin, sending a wink and a flying kiss across the arena. You immediately get shy, hiding your face in Hannah’s shoulder.

“Wow.” Felix starts, feeling Chan pat his back. “That’s my girlfriend, everyone.” He points in your direction, the arena flooded with screams as Felix’s ears and face slowly go red on the screen. You feel your own face heat up as you cover it, Hannah shaking you uncontrollably. “He’s blushing!” Han teases, pointing at your boyfriend’s crimson face. “C’mon, man, say something to her!” Chan says, ushering him closer to the edge of the stage.

“Y/N, I love you!” He holds a finger heart up, sending a flying kiss back to you. Your face goes warm at his bold move, yet you feel pride that he’s comfortable to do that openly in an arena full of his screaming fans. “Don’t cover your smile, you’re beautiful.” The screams somehow get even louder, and you feel as though a million eyes are on you as you wave your lightstick gleefully.

“Aww, so sweet!” Seungmin adds, poking at Felix’s open affection.

“Do you guys wanna know what Felix does? He scrolls through her photos sometimes before practice and he comes back all red. His excuse was that warm up was tough on him.” Chan exposes, though isn’t immediately stopped by his friend. You laugh at the thought, it being heartwarming at the same time.

You wait with Hannah, her parents, and Felix’s family after the concert, seeing Chan walk out first and greet his family, then you. “Felix ‘s coming, just grabbing something.” You nod, letting him reunite with his family for the time being. You smile at his feuding with his sister, feeling a tap on your shoulder.

Felix is standing right behind you with the biggest smile you’ve ever seen, and you practically jump into his arms. “Geez, I’m so sorry, I smell so bad.” His sweat makes your hands cling to him, yet when you look at his face, it made him all the more attractive. Still smelly, but somehow sexy at the same time. He had a towel on his shoulder, wiping his sweat off as best he could. He pulls away to greet his mom and his sisters, taking their pictures for them. You watched in awe how sweet their connection was and how close they were.

You overheard his mom talking to him before they left. “Treat her good, okay? You don’t want to lose her.” Your heart melts, now aware you’ve truly earned his mother’s approval. He walks over to you, stopping to simply admire you, his hand tucking your hair behind your ear.

“My god, you’re beautiful. I’ve missed you so much.” He mutters, the words making you blush and jump onto him for a long awaited kiss. One of those long, cheesy movie kisses was a way to describe it, but who cares if it was cheesy, you finally got to kiss him after months of being away from each other. “Loved your dance, by the way. When’d you get the time to learn that?”

“Circumstances. Figured it’d be best to be prepared.”

“You did fuckin’ amazing, then.” His hand covers his mouth, eyes widened in shock. “I didn’t mean to say that.”

“You aren’t live anymore, it’s fine.”

“Still felt wrong.”

“Do you guys want me to take a picture of you?” Hannah appears out of nowhere, startling you. You nod, handing her your phone, posing for a couple pictures, feeling Felix’s hand on your hip the entire time. “Alright, now kiss!” Hannah says jokingly, Chan shoving her shoulder.

“Seriously–“ You get cut off by Felix’s lips on yours, smiling into the kiss. Hannah eagerly takes photos, even when he pulls away, simply staring into your eyes as if he could see a whole world behind them. “Can you post that?” He asks, his lips curling into a smirk.

“Am I allowed to?”

“I’m the one that asked.”

That was a yes.

When Hannah hands your phone back to you after scrolling through the photos, she says, “You know I was joking, right?” You huff with a smile, staring at the photo of the two of you kissing. “If Felix was given a chance to kiss me, he would do it in a heartbeat, no questions asked.”

missed this goofball <3 love you always and forever, lixie (ps i love ur abs)

YALL R SO CUTE

AWWWW

i want this SO BAD you dont understand

that should be me

SHE IS SO PRETTY

tbh felix same id fold too

HAHAHA CAPTION IS SO REAL

“Have you been doing that for every show?” You ask, Felix running his fingers through your hair. “Doing what?” His eyes dart from your eyes to your lips and back. “Showing your abs. Lifting your shirt up and shit.”

He chuckles, his smile so pure talking about such a suggestive topic. “Yeah, why?”

“You’re telling me if I went to your Korea concert, I would have seen your abs there too?”

“You can see my abs anytime, Y/N.”

“I can?”

“You’re my girlfriend, of course you can.”

“Well, I don’t see you enough to see them that often but–“ When you turn back, his shirt is lifted up, showing them off in the middle of a Sydney sidewalk at an ungodly hour in the morning. You yank his shirt back down, Felix laughing almost too loud. “How indecent of you.”

“If indecent is what it takes to make your face like that, I’ll be it all the time.”

“Shut up.”

“You know you like it.”

“Maybe I do, so what?” You turn your face away from him, feeling his fingers rest under your chin to face you towards him again. “So… show me that you like it.”

“Felix, I am not having sex with you in the middle of the sidewalk at one in the morning.”

“So you’d have sex with me if we weren’t on the sidewalk?”

“I don’t think I can even have sex with you. At all.”

“Who’s stopping us?”

“Your fans. Your company.”

“They don’t have to know.”

“‘lix–“

“I know, I know. I’m just joking. Maybe when this whole idol thing is over.”

“It’ll be a while, then.”

“Hope you’re still in love with me by the time I’m 30.”

“I’ll always be in love with you, ‘lix.”

“Really?” He stops in front of you. “Really.”

“You promise?” He holds out his pinkie finger. You hook your own with his. “Promise.”

And he kisses you. Again, and again, and again.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

i wanna be where you are; feel so close though you’re so far, you’re my girl. 🎧

[aleeyenn]

SHAKING YOU hi more Bedtime Story(Pillowbook) headcanons please you can't just go in tags and say the BEST Pillow headcanons EVER then go "that's enough headcanon rambling" WRONG!!! LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER. ITS NEVER ENOUGH HEADCANON RAMBLING

OMG THANK YOU FOR YOUR CURIOSITY!!! i don’t have many headcanons off the top of my head since they usually come up during convos about them with my friends But! i am currently writing a pillowbook fanfic and it has mentions of some sweet headcanons/scenarios in there!!! here is your teaser:

- when pillow and book clean up after a g&d or yoyle chess session, pillow brushes her hand against books and book gets a bit flustered and apologizes each time, but pillow reassures her saying that it’s okay and that she did it on purpose

- pillow asks book to read her her favorite stories so she can know more about her interests and what she likes. as she does this, pillow kinda like cuddles up to her and book messes up her words because of the closeness (she is soooo touch starved) and pillow thinks it’s amusing but she doesn’t say anything

THATS KINDA ALL I CAN GIVE YOU FROM MY FIC … it’s at 7.4k words right now (it’s my first actual written piece OMG!) and i find that i’m a slow writer and i can only write when i get bursts of motivation so it’s taking a while BUT THE TENSION IS BUILDING! it’s definitely a romcom and i’ll announce when it’s out! (i’ll probs publish it on ao3 btw)

aside from stuff from the fanfiction i’m writing i think i can pull a few extras out of my sleeve

- pillow would look into books history to learn about her more and she would find that she received a little gold star her cover in bfdia 10. she would put a gold star on book when she thinks she’s doing good at something as encouragement for her to keep it up and book would be motivated by this

- book knows oragami. after she finds out that pillow is doing things for good luck she shows pillow how to make paper cranes and she tells her if she makes 1000 paper cranes it’ll give her good luck… and so she does! in a single day somehow… and gives them to book to wish Her good luck

- pillow generally picks up on every little detail about books mannerisms … but that’s a given when you’re talking about pillow LOL

- naily and price tag are like. the number one pillowbook fans HEELPPP LIKE THEY SET THEM UP AND STUFF and read into them together… they’re their instigators brah. they’re their wingmen. this headcanon came from the pillowbook fic “who cares?” on quotev PLEAASEEE IF YOU ARE A PILLOWBOOK FAN READ IT ITS THE BEST FANFICTION IVE EVER READ IN MY LIFE I AM NOT KIDDING i would go on more but i’ll go on forever… i love it so much Please read it(and author of it, if you are reading this HIIIII YOURE THE BEST)

IM SURE THERE ARE A LOT MORE BUT ITS REALLY LATE AND I HAVE TO GO TO BED SO I CANT THINK HARD ANYMORE… THANK YOU FOR READING AND YOUR INTEREST IN MY HEADCANONS! IT MAKES ME SO HAPPYYY

[whchenlvr]

Hello!!! Can I make request??

If yes, can I request the union + eunjang boys seeing their lover get hurt because of who they are?? Thank you!! Have a nice dayyy ^^

IVE BEEN WANTING TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS THANK YOUUUUU <33

when you get hurt ;

weak hero x gn!reader

gray yeon

➤ oh boy. unfortunately, due to the white mamba’s reputation, you’re a target

➤ we all know gray has little to no tolerance for any injury to someone he cares about, and in this case, you

➤ he wouldn’t comfort you right away. i think gray would take one good look at your bruised cheek or cut lip and say the five words we all know and love: “who did this to you.”

ben park

➤ guiltttttt ben would feel so awful that his usually strong, confident demeanor just deteriorates

➤ he’d just hold you, take care of you, and promise not to let anything happen to you again. he’d mean that, as well

➤ alex would have to pull him back from killing the person who hurt you, but they’d swear to never tell you that

alex go

➤ bro would be so excited to see you after school when he finds you hurt and crying

➤ his smile would instantly vanish. he’d pick you up and try to comfort you while also trying to find out what happened

➤ when you refuse to tell him what happens, he realized it’s because of him

gerard jin

➤ like ben, he’d also feel guilty for anything happening to you

➤ he gets really upset and feels like he failed to protect you just like how he failed to protect his group back then. but he will not leave your side until you tell him you’re okay

➤ he knows he won’t be able to contain himself if he goes after who hurt you alone, so he asks ben or gray to keep in in check and make sure he doesn’t cross a line

donald na

➤ remember when i said “touch you and they die”?? yeah. they’re screwed

➤ donald doesn’t like getting his hands messy, he has people for that. but for the certain someone who hurt you? because of him? he won’t stop until his hands are covered in their blood

➤ he actually pays people to watch over you after that to make sure nothing like this ever happens again <3

jake ji

➤ poor babe :( i feel like he’d be so devastated

➤ he hates the sight of you hurt, but knowing that it’s because of him? he’d actually distance himself from you for a little while after that

➤ when he finally comes around the two of you will just lay in your bed all day watching anime and k-dramas. he’ll promise to never let anything bad happen to you again

wolf keum

➤ okay, wolf absolutely hates seeing you forcibly involved in his fights, but when it does happen, he Loves going after your attacker

➤ obviously he takes care of you first and makes sure you’re okay, i don’t see him being the most affectionate guy, but he won’t let you out of his sights

➤ seeing how badly wolf messed the people who hurt you up, you’re pretty safe from then on. that doesn’t stop him from thinking about you all the time, though

jimmy bae

➤ honestly i’m not quite sure how he’s react

➤ i think jimmy would be a lot more emotional when it’s just the two of you, checking your injuries and kissing every single one of them

➤ in public, he’d just be hellbent on destroying the people who hurt you. he’d do it, too

[personwhowrites]

hi ! could i request a 141 x reader who celebrates yule instead of christmas ? ive seen so many "celebrating christmas with 141" posts everywhere, but i dont celebrate christmas so i thought id send a request in myself, thank you !

Absolutely! I did have to do some research on Yule since I never actually heard about it, so I apologize in ahead if I did get things messed up. It was so fun to learn about the holiday!

Slight Simon “Ghost” Riley x reader.

You rub your hands together as you stare at a log. An plain simple oak log, the members stare at you, thinking your crazy for a log. You grab it smile, December twenty one, perfect day to get the log.

“You okay there y/n?” Price says looking at you with the log in your arms. “You do know we can’t take stuff from our missions.”

“Oh uh.. can we please take this log?” You say softly and hold it closer to your body. “Please, I won’t ask for anything next year!”

“Just let the Bonnie take her log.” Soap says elbowing Price who sighs and then summits. “Atta! We got you a log Y/n!”

“Sweet!” You say with a smile, the helicopter landing near you. “Ah let’s go guys”

You hop into the helicopter, getting a weird stare from the driver. You give them an awkward smile as you sit down and hold the oak log close to you. A symbol to your holiday, Gaz and Soap sit next to you as Price and Ghost sit across from the three of you.

“So the log!” Soap yells over the sound of the helicopter. “What’s it for!”

You act as if you can’t hear the man. You stare at the log, happy and smiling. It was a good log that you picked. Ghost and stares at you with price, a slight worrisome feeling that Price can’t push away.

Your in the air and look to your right. Seeing Gaz staring at the log, a very daring look. You cough getting his mind and eyes on you.

“..Don’t even think about it.” You mumble holding the log closer to your body. “I know what you were thinking.”

“I wasn’t gonna throw it out the door..” Gaz mumbles with a sigh. “Okay maybe I was.”

You shake your head, tossing back a laughter. Price stares at you and the log, seeing you so happy with a log got him really worried. Have you gone insane with all the missions the past few days?

—

You land at the base, laswell awaiting the group arrival. She has a Christmas sweater on and thick Santa hats for everyone.

“Price! Gaz! soap! ghost!” Laswell says walking over with a smile. “And Y/n with a lo— wait why does she have a log?”

“Let her be..she’s happy with that log for some reason.” Price says with a sigh and grabs a Santa hat. “What’s this for?”

“Since you all be out heading home for Christmas I thought we could have our small party.” laswell says handing the others a Santa hat. “Here, I can give the log one.”

“Oh uh.. I don’t.. do Christmas” you say with an awkward smile. “I better go..”

You rush away quickly with the log in your arms. Dropping the Santa hat in the process, Ghost stares at the hat then at you. Finding it curious that you also don’t like Christmas. Laswell stares at the man and sighs.

“How’s she holding up?” Laswell asks the men who stand there in confusion. “Hello!”

“Oh uh..she’s been great on missions.” Price says putting the Santa hat on. “Wont talk much about her family or.. anything personal.”

“She’s a good help in the field..” Gaz mumbles still looking at the reaction you ran off to. “She’s staying at the base for Christmas with Soap and Ghost.”

“That must be nice! You three can celebrate Christmas!” Laswell says with a smile as soap looks at Ghost. “..Or not?”

“Not a fan of it..” Ghost mumbles handing the Santa hat back to her. “I don’t know about soap.”

“I might, but I don’t know.. I rather relax.” Soap says stretching and looks at Gaz and Price. “You two better get going, the last plane to your home towns leaves in an hour.”

“..About that..” Gaz says with a chuckle. “I don’t really have anyone to be with for Christmas. My ma is out of town and I don’t wanna travel.”

“Guess we are all staying?” Price says making the others look at him. “What? I wanna know what’s up with y/n and that damn log. She’s holding it like a baby.”

“We better go check on her..” Laswell says rubbing her chin. “She did request some weird stuff when I called her a few days back.”

“Like what?” Soap says grabbing his bag off the floor.

“Pine cones, Dried cranberries, Cuttings of a mistletoe.. holly, pine needles, and ivy..” Laswell says counting the things off her finger. “Oh! and some feathers and cinnamon sticks..ah what else.. oh right a hot glue gun and a lace red ribbon.”

“The hell would she need that for?” Gaz says confused. “Is it something we should be worried about?”

“Well it’s just plants ain’t it?” Price says starting to walk ahead the direction you ran off to. “Don’t think we should.”

—

You happily start decorating the oak log. Using every drop of the hot glue gun, placing and marking the right spots you want everything. You will hear the others come in and play their stuff down. Soap will immediately point out what you’re doing to Price. Which immediately concerns him.

“Y/n what are you doing there?” Prive says walking over with Gaz not far behind. “Okay, uh.. that’s a pretty log?..”

“…mhm..” You hum softly paying no attention to him. “..Can you pass me that pine needle?”

Gaz reaches over and passes it to you. Seeing how pretty the log is he sits down next to you and watches. The soap and Ghost confuse look over to see Price and Gaz watching you decorate the log. The two man also walk over and watch you, soap slightly surprised you haven’t burned your hand yet.

“..so the log..what is it for..?” Soap asks again getting your attention. “Well?”

“Its for Yule..” You mumble slightly embarrassed. “It’s a holiday I celebrate, since Christmas isn’t my thing.”

“Yule?” They all say in unison causing you to laugh.

“It’s uh.. a holiday somewhat similar to Christmas..” You say looking back at the log. “..well not really.. it’s when.. um people..welcome back the sun, after long dark days..”

“Hold on what?” Gaz says looking at you. “Welcome back the sun?”

“..Well uh Yule was a festival long ago. For Vikings, Germanic tribes and people in the pre-Christian Eroupe. “You says holding a feather in your hand. “..most days it’s just now celebrated by Wiccans and other Neo-pagan practitioners.” You pause for a moment and place the feather down on the log. “Yule gives.. people a way to expand our four inner realms and to come forth.”

The members remain silent as you continue on explaining the Yule. Gaz hands you what you need while you talk. Ghost leans against the wall and watches you, while soap sits on the other side of you, slightly leaning his head on your shoulder. Price sits sits down on your floor and watches you.

“Like I said before.. uh Pagan and Wiccan families are the most common to celebrate it.” You say softly looking at the finished log. “It celebrates the return of sun.. they sometimes add a lot of lights in their home.” You pause again and unplug the hot glue gun with Price help. “It originated in Norway.. they used to think the sun was this giant wheel that rolled away from the world..”

“That’s.. interesting how come.. you celebrate it?” Price says rubbing his chin. “Did someone introduce you to it?”

“Yes.. a close friend before I moved away to join the military.” You say looking up at him. “It’s a fun holiday..”

“So you just decorate oak logs?” Soap says looking at the log. “That’s it?”

“There is so much more to do.. and you don’t really have to decorate oak logs.” You say looking at him. “I picked to.. since when I burn it I know it will represent.. Wisdom and strength..”

“Oh so each type of wood has its own meaning?” Gaz asks slightly understanding. “What do the others mean?”

“Well.. families usually burn Pine since they hope for a good year of prosperity..” You say softly looking at the log in front of you. “Couples.. will drag a bough of birch to their hearth. If they wish fertility the upcoming year.”

“..And I’m guessing you only decorate a Pine and oak log before?” Price says looking at your now sadden eyes. “..Or..”

“None.. actually.. an accident happened before we could even.. start it.” You say getting up from the floor. “..this is my first year alone..”

“Why don’t we celebrate with you?” Gaz says getting up and helping soap get up. “We aren’t leaving for the holiday and hell this seems nice.”

“Really?” You say looking at them. “You guys will actually do this with me?”

“Sure why not!” Soap says with a smile. “What else do you do in this Yule holiday.”

“..I mean I was going to out and get some food and return to the base and eat.” You say with a soft laugh. “Like a feast..”

“Does the feast have to be something specific?” Ghost says making you remember he’s been there the whole time.

“No.. it can be anything really, your favorite things. Just plain food..” You respond looking at him now. “I don’t know how to cook so I just planning to get some chips and soda.”

“Why don’t we al go out to eat!” Soap says with a smile. “Like a family, Y/n you pick the restaurant and we will come along.”

“That will have to be on the twenty fourth.” You say softly. “I just wanted Sri get the log done while I declutter some stuff around my space.”

“Oh so you clean out things you don’t need too?” Gaz says slightly confused. “This is an interesting holiday.”

“Mhm..” you mumble slightly embarrassed.

“Then what are we waiting for.” Price says clapping his hands. “Let’s get this place clean up.”

“Do we have to decorate?” Soap asks you making you look up form the log once more. “Besides the log.”

“I mean we could just put candles or some fake plants around..” You say with a smile. “It doesn’t really matter, it just matters that we all just.. feel happy and comfortable.”

They all nod to your words ans head to their own spot. Starting to clean the room you all share with, made you slight happy. Seeing how strangers you started working with couple months ago now want to celebrate Yule.

—

December twenty four came by fast. You were laying down in bed reading your book. Enjoying the silence until Soap bursted into the room with Gaz with excitement. You jump out of your bed and stare at the two of them, Ghost and price behind them. You see them holding food on their hands.

“I thought we were going out to eat?” You say walking over to them. “Ah wait I forgot holiday..”

“Mhm, we went ahead and ordered some Chinese food. We got you broccoli with chicken.” Price says setting the food down on a table. “Are you alright with that?”

“It’s perfectly fine!” You say with a smile and look at Soap. “You two are excited.”

“I read more about the holiday you mentioned and I can’t stop thinking about it.” Soap says with a bright smile. “I like it more than Christmas now! It has more meaning than giving shit to people.”

“Can we just.. eat Im starving.” Ghost says grabbing plate. “Which one is mine?”

“Any of them really, I order randomly.” Price days with a smile. “I do know I ordered broccoli with chicken.”

“..Why don’t we all just share the food? Can’t hurt us to try new things.” Gaz says looking at the food. “God that smells so fucking good.”

“Damn right it does..” Price says handing everyone a fork. “I didn’t think we would be sharing so uh.. enjoy?”

You give them a smile and nod. Grabbing some orange chicken and stuffing it in your mouth. You were too busy eating with soap to realize Ghost has taken his mask off. Price went to lock the door incase anyone tried to get in. Eating with the men was a new thing you never thought that would happen. Ghost stares at for a slight moment, slightly happy you aren’t mentioning him without his mask.

—

After a couple hours of just relaxing and playing card games against them you looked at the time. There you saw it twelve am. You quickly got up form your chair, almost falling down in the process and rushed to get something under your bed.

“What are you doing! We are in a middle of a game.” Gaz says looking over at with ghost. “Y/n!”

“I need you guys to write something you wish for!” You say running over slipping and landing in Ghost arms. “Write! Fast! Don’t tell anyone what you write!”

You tear small pieces of paper and hand them out to the men. Ghost still has you in your arms and stares at you. Slightly smiling under his mask seeing you so focus on the holiday. You finally notice your in his arms and move away. You hand him a paper and and the others start writing.

“When your done roll it up and grab a coat!” You say scribbling something on your paper.

You finish up and rush to the log, gently grabbing it and rushing out the room. The men hurry after you in slight confusion, all grabbing a coat expect you. They see you look around and place the log down.

“Oh! Are we doing what I think were doing?” Soap says coming up from behind you. “We are!”

“Mhm!” You say quickly grabbing the papers out their hands. “Someone have some sort of lighter?”

“I do..” Price say taking it out his pocket. “For what?”

“To burn the log, it’s the final thing to do..” You say with a smile. “Give me!”

Price hands it to you, slightly concerned as you crouch down to the log. You flick the handle of the lighter and hold it up to the log, which immediately burst into flames. Ghost quickly grabs you away from it and and stares at you.

“Careful..” He mumbles letting go of you and letting you approach the fire again with the papers. “What are you doing?”

“Hopping.. the year will become great.” You say dropping the papers in the fire and backing up. “You all do the same.”

“God, the log is really burning.” Price says looking at you and the log. “..Y/n.. you really love this holiday don’t you?”

“..Mhm.. puts my mind at ease..finally being able to let them go.” You mumble taking your necklace off and placing it in the fire. “Like they would wanted..”

The others remain in silence as they see your paper drop in the fire. They see the writing, their hearts sink down to their stomachs.

“..To live another year without..you..my family..”

Ghost pulls you between him and the men. All of you huddled up, watching the log burn, your necklace and paper burning too.

“Happy Yule..” Soap mumbles for the group putting his arms around them.

“Happy Yule..” You respond looking at your burning necklace and then at your new found family.

[vacantgodling]

this year was one of the first years in a long time that i TRULY committed myself to writing any and everything that i thought of and it’s been a really good feeling. so starting from this year, i wanna have a little year in review so i can look back and reminisce on how much i actually did cuz sometimes it’s hard to tell lol.

TOTAL WORDS WRITTEN (january — december 2023)

139,345 (as of 11/30 (google docs only))

i’ve written more probably, but my notes app is harder to keep track of word counts in. this total is also across all pieces of prose and poetry, though poetry isn’t a significant number lol

if this was all in one piece i’d probably have a full novel already lmao 💀

LONGEST SINGLE PIECE

paramour chapter 9 — masquerade, clocking in at 5,894 words

WIP THAT HAS MADE THE MOST HEADWAY BY THE NUMBERS

paramour is sitting pretty at 30k-ish words written overall (including me writing chapter 20 twice lol)

WIP THAT HAS MADE THE MOST HEADWAY BY THE HEART

definitely cage. i’ve had this fanfiction and wip for years and the fact that i’d finished the full outline like last year but didnt start writing it until now and how much headway ive made in such little time… i’m really proud of myself. i can’t wait to actually finish this bitch

TOP PIECES WRITTEN THIS YEAR

Worthless War -> the cherry on top, best thing i’ve written this year and probably in general for a long time.

Come To Bed -> when i lost my mind about buddy daddies earlier this year, this fic really encapsulated everything i felt about the show. i love the narration, i love how it’s fun and playful but also deep, and i remember having so much fun writing it.

Paramour Chapter 20 “Careless Whisper” -> the rewrite of chapter 20 i am UNREASONABLY obsessed with and it’s a shame i can’t post it here without giving so so so much away. i love it so much i am willing to share it with those who don’t care about spoilers lol but its smutty and emotionally charged and everything perfect about amon and hya’s fucked up mess

A Fool’s Errand -> this is in the role swap amon and hya au and tbh this au is So Fun to me. getting to be in amon’s head more often is definitely a treat and the description of the make out is PEAK

Good Feeling -> i will never be normal about hue and jihan and i think i captured their relationship esp in the early days perfectly so i’m just gonna cry about it

Ritual -> i really love this piece and giving life again to some old ocs meant a lot to me. + the smut 🤌🏾🤌🏾

Distraction -> no one knows or cares about these ocs but me and that’s okay i’ll just be feral about them on my own 😭

GOALS FOR NEXT YEAR

reach 150k words written overall

finish cage like it’s GOING to happen i will it

finish the first draft of paramour!!!

[preciadosbass]

26/7/24 🕷️ [yesterday, cuz i didn’t write on the day] // possible tw for talk of cals (???)

i’m just gunna assume i woke up at 11, because i have been doing so ever since i left school. i had a cream cheese bagel for breakfast, which i shouldn’t really be having as apparently they’re like 350 cals — butt, i’ve gotten into a habit of going on decently long walks consistently so i ended up cancelling it out further along in the day.

since i’ve been [unintentionally] going to sleep at 5am every night and eating less then 400cal a day i’ve been forgetting literally EVERYTHING. but i do remember listening to ls dunes for the first time after i had breakfast. i don’t think i’ll forget it and i don’t think i’ll ever forgive myself for not seeing them when they were over at the uk. anyways, i’m kind of surprised i haven’t listened to them before. i’ve listened to every other one of franks projects. then i downloaded a few videos of tony [perry].

i watched sam and colby/ronnie radke streams, put up photos of max green + cuddled boris [my cat] up until 3:30 which is when i have to get ready for youth club. i’ve been like three times to this particular one, and i think it’s okay. i mean, i’ve gone from not going outside for a year to being around 40+ teens so its obviously gunna be weird for me. i only really go in hopes that i’ll find a friend, but i haven’t even gotten close to learning about the people there yet.

anyways, this time i was going solely because i got spoken to properly for the first time last week 2 minutes before i had to leave and i wanted to see those same girls again. spoiler alert, they weren’t there. but there is this energetic person.. girl? boy? [i don’t know, they haven’t told me yet] called jester that tries to involve me in their small friend group so i sat outside and just people watched for three hours. i don’t mind going, i just cant wait until people actually talk to me there so i don’t have to be alone. i do really try to socialise.

that was about it, really. i just listened to everyone until it was it 7 and i could text my mum to pick me up. i intended to ask jester if i could have their number/the number of anyone else there but i forgot. i cant tell whether i regret it or not, because if i did ask, i’d probably freak out trying to. at this point i’d had 515cals and burnt 200 and i was soo hungry so i asked my mum if i could get food, which i DO regret and the guilt is still overwhelming.

when i got home i listened to falling in reverse and finished my food [embarrassingly] and somehow convinced my mum to go on a walk with me again. i wish i could go out alone, as much as i don’t dislike walking with her. i made a deal with her that i’ll make a collage quickly before it got too dark so i did that aswell. it was made up of entirely receipts this time.

i changed again so i wouldn’t get eaten alive by gnats in the woods and we left at like 8ish. we walked around the park just down the road from us and thankfully but unthankfully it was all uphill. i was tired after not doing much exercise since like year 5 but according to google walking uphill burns more cals than walking normally and i really needed to make up from my mess up.

i took my dads phone with me incase i needed to call the home phone and because i wanted to take a picture of myself with a beanie on because i haven’t worn one in years and i know how the landscape is there but it started lagging and ran out. it’d been an hour and a half before we got round the park and me and mum just so happened to run into my neighbour [that ive never met, my neighbours are ages away] right before we got to our house.

he was ‘reflecting’ with a glass of wine. he talked to us for like 30-40 minutes while we stood at the side of the road, he was really drunk, but he was really nice. he invited us to a party and kept on saying about how happy he was to run into us. he then started to get really passionate about his landlord stuff, which i didn’t understand, but i acted like i did. we eventually got home and i was wondering if dad would think something happened to us because he couldn’t call his phone to see if we were okay, and originally, i thought our neighbour was him looking for us. but long story short, he wasn’t, so i just told him about seeing that neighbour.

i hope i do get to go to that party because he [my neighbour] has a grandkid i never knew about and i’m genuinely desperate for a friend, especially nearby. my cals ended up being 474 by the end of the day [cuz of what i’d burnt] which still isn’t great but at least it’s not terrible, i think. i was gunna watch a good girls guide to m*rder [or whatever it is, i have the book and my dad told me there’s something on tv either inspired or made about it.] but my mum wanted to sleep and i’ve gotten it in my head that i have to ask my parents questions about my cat every night for him to be okay so i did that instead.

we surprisingly didn’t argue this time round so afterwards i just went downstairs to do my teeth while listening to hawthorne heights and say goodnight to boris. i generally spend two hours doing that but it took 27 minutes today because i was falling asleep. when i was falling asleep he kept on coming into my room and went under my bed a few times which is extra cute considering asked him to a few minutes earlier.

have a good day/night -_<

pics from youth club ^