#okay honestly i have more written but that's the only scenes that are FINISHED finished lmao

[rosyhoneydew]

I'll Cover You

Written for @bucktommypositivityweek | Week 2, Day 2: Scenes from a firetruck | cw for mentions of dissociation, flashbacks

I wrote two entries for today! If mildly steamy fluff is more your vibe it's here -> Stolen Moment

The winds are strong, even days after the tornado’s long gone.

Buck hadn’t seen anything like it before. Tornadoes, sure, but the kind of large-scale damage that came from an invasive cloud of bees droning en masse and descending on the city like a plague? A first. He’s nursing a sting or two himself for a few days.

It’s almost a relief to get called on scene two days later. Almost. Because while plane crashes are, at least, familiar, they’re still grueling.

All things considered, it’s not as bad as it could’ve been. The 737 went down on land this time, but it had only barely made it off the ground before taking a nosedive back onto the tarmac. The passengers were buckled in and the drop itself wasn’t too big. So yeah, they got pretty lucky.

They’re still on the scene now. Hen and Eddie are working at the cockpit last he knew, Chim’s somewhere in the med bay here with him, working on a bigger trauma. Buck’s been handling some of the lower grade injuries and he’s cool, really. Yeah it would be nice to be out there, doing the big boy stuff, but they’ve got a new captain and he’s learning to pick his battles.

He’s just finishing wrapping up a kid’s ankle. He can’t be more than 7 but he’s been so brave, holding his little sister’s hand to keep her from crying. He’s got the elastic bandage just in place when the wind rips the kid’s jacket from where it was draped on his shoulders and under the 217’s truck.

“I gotcha!” he reassures the kid quick. “One sec, you stay right here for me, okay?”

Buck shuffles over to the truck in a walk-run and bends down low to peek underneath. It would probably be easier to grab the jacket from the other side, but he’s already here so he just finishes ducking down, crawls under and reaches out for the corner of the fabric.

He’s still under the truck when the next big wind hits. It leaves the truck shaking and groaning around him. Buck freezes. It feels like all logical thought in his brain shuts off.

The truck isn’t going to tip over. He’s not stuck. If he had the presence of mind he could wiggle his toes, even. But there’s something about being under here, hearing the voices around him, it has him tense all over. He can’t move.

When he looks back on it, he’ll wonder why it set him off. It’s not nighttime, there are no kids with bombs strapped to them, it’s not like he was even under the truck when it tipped last time. It’s a fluke, almost. But it can’t be helped. He’s petrified.

—

Tommy honestly thought his first call working with the 118’s A-shift would have had a little more novelty, but it’s just been long. He’s happy to see Evan, of course, but he hardly sees him. He’s been over in the med bay for the last couple of hours that Tommy’s been teamed up with Viera, pulling passengers out of the wreck.

He had at least been able to drop off an older woman directly to Evan about an hour ago.

Well, Patricia, it looks like your day is looking up! You’re in good hands with this one. He’ll patch you up real good.

Ahh, my job’s the easy part. You’re just lucky firefighter pilot Kinard was here to save you.

She’d only had a sprained wrist, but Tommy had watched them from afar for a minute, ever impressed with the way Evan kept her calm, reassurances and jokes taking the fear out of her eyes. He has to turn back before long, but he lets that moment carry him through the next push. He’s going home to that man.

He’s jogging back to check in at base when he hears crying to his right. There’s a kid standing still, holding the hand of a little girl and he’s wailing at the sky. That doesn’t seem right. Tommy’s eyes track around the area and he spots boots sticking out of the side of their truck. Definitely not right. He changes course, picking up his speed as he approaches the kids.

“Hey, bud, you okay?” He’s got his hands on the boy’s shoulders, grounding him, hopefully. “You hurting anywhere?”

The kid coughs out a few more sobs in Tommy’s face, but he shakes his head. He looks like he’s willing himself not to be scared. Jesus, kids are resilient.

“Alright, that’s good, I’m going to check on my friend here, you gonna be okay for a minute?” A nod. Good.

Tommy turns his attention to the truck behind him, lays flat, knocking his helmet off in the process. The guy’s not moving, but Tommy’s not able to figure out at a glance what happened here. There’s no gas leak, no threat to public safety over here.

“You good, man?” he calls out.

The body of the guy twitches. Not dead. That’s good. He clears his throat.

“Can you feel your feet? I can try to move you but I need to know if you’ve got any injuries I should watch out for.”

No response. Okay. Time to change tack.

Tommy rights himself and walks to the other side of the truck, resuming position on the asphalt. He shuffles in a little closer and finally gets a look at the guy’s face.

Evan. It’s Evan.

“Evan?” he says. He’s not sure it comes out as much more than a breath.

Evan’s eyes do flick to his then, but there’s still something distant in his gaze. He’s dissociated. It comes to mind then, the stories told at happy hours and trivia nights, and the ones told only in the sanctuary that is their bedroom. They're good stories, but Tommy knows better than most the toll that kind of shit can take on a person. Evan's having a flashback.

“Alright, alright, baby,” Tommy says under his breath. He’s not sure Evan would hear him even if he spoke up. He looks pretty gone.

Tommy scoots half a foot closer, puts both palms flat to the ground.

“Evan,” he starts, “can you do this with your hands? Just like mine.” He flexes his hands a bit to demonstrate.

Evan’s own hands are balled up. It looks like he army crawled under here. His arms are bent at his sides, curled in tight half under his body. He blinks a few times.

“Your hands, Evan.” Tommy picks his own up and places them back down again. “Just like this.”

Evan mirrors the movements.

“Good job, that’s perfect.”

“Kinard?” He hears from behind him.

“We’re good here, Sloane.” Who knows if she’ll believe him; she’s a damn good secondary when they’re in the air but she’s nosy as all get-out.

He hears the sound of her turnouts rustling as she shifts around, deciding whether to stay or go.

“Sloane. I got this. Can you round back to the kids on the other side? I’m going to be here a minute.”

He hears the sound of boots squeaking behind him as she does what he asks. Okay, Ev, just you and me.

Evan’s fingertips are curling, his eyes pinched closed.

“Ev, sweetheart, look at me.” He does. “I’m gonna grab your arm okay? Then we can work on getting you over here. Sound good?”

There’s no response, but that’s okay. Tommy’s going real slow. He reaches out and places a sure hand on Evan’s arm.

“Can you push yourself toward me?”

His eyes close again and for a second Tommy falters, mentally jumping two steps back to figure out a different path forward. But then Evan pushes. He digs the meat of his hand into the ground and uses the leverage to slide his body toward Tommy.

“Just like that. Exactly like that.”

He’s close enough now that Tommy can reach his shoulder. He gets a good grip and rolls Evan the rest of the way, pulling him up to sitting once he’s on his back and out from under the belly of the truck. He watches as Evan scrambles to pull his feet out.

Tommy’s got him sat in between the V of his legs, one arm around his waist, and brings the other up to Evan’s face, pushing the damp hair off his forehead. They’re tucked in between trucks, so the sound of commotion from the continued efforts of the other houses is muffled. The loudest thing he can hear is their panting, both going a little boneless with relief.

Tommy places a kiss to Evan’s temple. He’s sweaty there too. He feels Evan’s breathing slow down a bit, but he’s reluctant to break the quiet. He’s not sure that Evan’s flashbacks are like his, everyone’s a little different, but he sometimes needs the silence after. Just to collect himself. So he gives that to Evan, too.

“Did- did you get it?” Evan finally says, startling Tommy just a bit.

“Get it?”

“The jacket.” He’s smoothing his palms over his pants; nervous habit.

Tommy stretches his neck to look behind him, sees the blue rain jacket lying there. He can pinch it with his fingers from where they’re sitting. He drags it out. Troublemaker.

They sit together for another minute. Tommy can hear Sloane marching the kids away to find their parents. If he really tunes into the noises around them, he can hear some laughter and lots of walkies; they're finishing up here. He'll probably get called in soon enough to pack up.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

Evan nods, then tips his head back onto Tommy’s shoulder. “Better. Thank you.”

Tommy moves his hand down to Evan’s face, just to tilt his cheek a little closer, plants a long, sure kiss there.

“I’ve got you.”

Evan smiles. “Yeah, you got me.”

[spooky-bunnys]

Angst Ran request

The reader has a crush on ran and he does everything to get ran to notice him, trying to talk to him, trying to invite him out to hang outs, even getting gifts. So one day the reader has the courage to write a love letter and hand it to ran. The reader is just nervous hoping ran would accept his feelings but all comes down when ran not only harshly rejects but rips the letter and saying that there was never anything between them

Note: To the person who anonymously asked why I haven't written the requests, it's because I have to want and feel comfortable to write them. Some people don't read what I am and am not okay with writing. I also don't like being rushed to write. Makes me lose the little amount of inspiration I have. But here is this request! Hope ya like it!

Title: Love Confession?

Fandom: Tokyo Revengers

Pairing: Ran x M! Reader

Warnings: MAJOR ANGST, like I'm talking mocking, manipulating, and straight up Ran being a complete ass.

Ran sighed happily as he ate his favorite dessert. (Name) had given it to him after Ran gave him his homework to "help" him finish. Honestly he just didn't want to do it. But Rindou's little friend was ALWAY more then happy to help.

Speaking of Rindou, Ran peak his eyes across the room where Rindou was watching the scene with a small scowl. Ran knows how much the gullible idiot meant to his baby brother. He honestly doesn't know what his little brother sees in him. (Name) was too trusting and nice for his own good.

Maybe thats why Rindou kept him around. To have a little errand boy or maybe so (Name) could buy him stuff he didn't want to pay for. If it was either reason Ran could see it, but deep down he knew it was the innocence and kindess (Name) has that drew in Rindou. Like Ran said before, he was too good for his own good.

Ran shook his head ridding himself of said thoughts. He looked over and saw Rindou open his mouth, but was interrupted when (Name) cleared his throat. Informing Ran he was finished with his homework. As Ran reached for his homework to check over the answers his eyes caught a small red envelope.

He stared at it with a raised brow before looking up and seeing (Name) blush with a proud look. Which was quickly wiped away when Ran huffed a small snort. Ran's snort turned into a small laugh which lead to a loud and amused cackle.

"What is this?"

"I-Its a letter I wrote for you..."

"I can see that. But it almost looks like a love confession letter."

Ran took the silence and (Name) now frozen expression as his answer. That the letter was IN FACT a love confession. Which only amused Ran even more. He ignored the now teary and heart broken (Name) and ripped the envelope without even reading it.

"Well sorry to burst your bubble but I'm already in a very HAPPY relationship. Do you remember the guy that stayed the night last week?"

(Name) didn't say anything. He only nodded. The guy was a huge jerk. Demanding (Name) go and buy them drinks and snack from the convenience store. He tried refusing but when Ran asked him so nicely.

"That was my boyfriend. There isn't anything between us. I only tolerate you because your Rindou's little friend. I honestly don't know where you had the confidence to even think you had a chance with me."

Ran took his silence as a go ahead and finish what he was saying.

"You just thought you could buy me gifts, do my homework, try inserting yourself into my life, and I would just accept your feelings for me?"

(Name) didn't say anything. Just let the tears run down his face as Ran laughed again. He quickly got up and gathered his things before quickly leaving. He couldn't stay here another moment.

As (Name) ran away from the Haitani household, the brothers were still where they sat. Ran was still happily laughing his head off as Rindou stared heartbroken at the ajared front door. Was Ran the only reason (Name) wanted to be around him?

Or was he actually Rindou's friend? At this point, he wasn't too sure. As he stared at his wheezing brother, Rindou could only feel shame and pity that (Name) had fallen for him. Maybe Rindou could use this in his favor, though. What if he used this to get (Name) to like him instead?

[ladytauria]

You have too many wips I want to know more about ;-; but I will be strong and only ask about the jaytim teenage fantasies

haha, you’re definitely welcome to ask about more than one!

jaytim teenage fantasies is a duo of fics that has jaytim acting out two fantasies they had as teenagers. tim goes first, and it’s honestly kind of an accident. they’re talking about crushes, and robin, and tim confesses that many of his earliest fantasies involved robin

he ends up narrating one to jason, while acting out portions of the scene—

“You’d rescue me—from a mugger, maybe, or from falling. You whisk me off somewhere safe, where you can make sure I’m okay… and lecture me about recklessness.” Tim’s mouth quirks. “I’m grateful. Not just for the save, but for everything. I don’t bother listening to the lecture.” Shocking. “Instead, I have to ask. How do you do it? How do you protect Gotham, and watch out for Batman, and still live a normal life? It must be so hard.”

Jason can picture it.

Being fifteen again, when Robin was losing its magic. When he looked around Gotham, seeing not the people they’d saved—but the one’s they hadn’t. The ones they failed. He’s fighting with Bruce more and more, questioning everything. Even school doesn’t offer an escape. And Dick—well. Dick is great, but busy. Distant. And always fighting with Bruce.

He’s lonely. He doesn’t think he’d realized how much, then.

And then—

There’s Tim, looking at him with bright eyes and flushed cheeks, faintly awestruck and painfully earnest. In Jason’s mind, he’s not 12, 13 as he would have been, but 14. 15, even. Younger than him, but not young.

“It is. I know it is, now, and even then I suspected. You brush it off, though. After all, you’re Robin. This is what you do. And I say, ‘Yeah—but. You deserve to get something back. To be taken care of.’”

Fantasy-Tim’s cheeks grow red, while real-Tim’s pinken.

“’Let me make you feel good.’ And I drop to my knees.”

Jason’s breath catches. He’s flushed. His skin prickles; his cock stirs. Teenage-him probably would have panicked and fled, or tried to stop him; face tomato-red. Fantasy-teen Jason stays, biting his lip, back pressed against the wall, thighs parting.

He wants. He’s nervous. But he needs this. Needs someone’s soft touch. Concern. Affection. Fifteen-year-old Jason needed so badly for someone to care.

“I know now it’s a one-piece, but in the fantasy…” Tim pauses, then smiles and says, “In the fantasy, the panties come down easy.”

Jason shivers. His nipples feel tight—his whole body feels tight, like he’s too big for his skin. Teenage-him, scaly green panties around his knees; cock flushed and red, drooling at the sight of Tim pretty & pink-cheeked in front of him.

The way his pulse would have raced; his breath quickened.

“I doubt I would have been very good at it. Even teen me could admit that,” Tim says. “But I would have made up for it with eagerness. There’d have been a moment, a pause where I tried to figure out how to start.”

Fuck. He can see the look of concentration on fantasy-Tim’s face; that little furrow between his brows, the determination in his eyes. The way his gaze would have flicked up, toward Jason, then steeled.

His hand around the base of Jason’s cock—the way real-Tim’s hand is wrapping around it now. He curls his fingers into the sheets, feeling almost bad for the way fantasy-Jason has to scramble at brick.

side b focuses on one of jason’s fantasies—being tied up in wonder woman’s lasso, being made to ask for and admit everything he wants done to him. they can’t get her lasso, so they decide to mimic it as best they can with some (modified) truth pollen and rope~

i don’t have anything written for this yet unfortunately—it’s been giving me trouble lmao

side a is mostly finished, i’m just considering expanding the beginning, haha. but i’m waiting to post them as a set!

[curious about my wips? send me an ask about one of the ones listed here.]

[wexhappyxfew]

hey shannon!!!! from prompt list 3 & the action category - “intervene” with kennedy and bucky, but kennedy is the one doing the intervening/defending him????!!! HELP - @softspeirs

KATIEEEE!!!!!! @softspeirs i am *here* i am *back* and we are here with a kennedy x bucky prompt that had me lowkey losing my mind w/this piece half-written months ago and me now just finally having the time to finish it up. the pure EXCITEMENT of this prompt with kennedy and bucky, kennedy's reactions, bucky's reactions and their dialogue....oh i was absolutely losing it. definitely one of my longer ones i think, but it came out just as i was hoping (and probably better). also the scene inspo for this hit me even before your prompt and when you sent this in - oh i was SO EXCITED. so i sincerely hope you enjoy!!! :D

flak-happy

(a/n): kennedy x bucky (pre-stalag, pre-anything-that-happened-in-the-stalag lmao). i fear we enter bucky: the definition of yearning, and kennedy: the definition of miss-repressed-emotions and oh boy does it make for the absolutely perfect combination, especially in a moment of time where things are turning rather dark and dreary and sad. oh kennedy farley you are so seen!!!! please enjoy my-return installment in the silver bullets universe!!! <3333 (he'll make it up to her, he swears)

"5-0," Kennedy said quietly, the tiny bit of newspaper in her hands something she was half-way between scorning, ripping into a million pieces, and lighting on fire, "they're trying to kill me."

"It's a baseball team, Kenny," Margie said from beside her, "the only thing actually trying to kill you are the Germans."

"But I have a helluva lot more emotional involvement to this team than the Krauts, Margie, that's the difference." Kennedy said, flipping the paper over and grumbling under her breath, "Fucking Danny Doyle - at this point, just say he's in left field 24/7, even when he's actually in left field. Can't even hit the goddamn ball."

"Okay," Vivian Ratcliff said quietly from beside Kennedy, plucking the newspaper clipping that Lieutenant Montez had gotten for her this morning from her fingers and neatly folding it up, "you need a drink. A stiff one at that." Kennedy sighed and crossed her arms between the two as they continued walking forward towards the flying club and bit back her lip.

"And I'm going to have to hear all about how the Yankees won their game," Kennedy mumbled, "please say we can open a tab?"

"Or!" Margie butted in, "Better yet, someone will already have a tab started for us." Kennedy glanced at Margie, gaze burning into the side of Vivian's head, who was currently running a hand through her short, dark curls in the hand-held mirror she was carrying with her.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Kennedy asked her and Margie chuckled.

"Ev Blakely." Margie offered with a grin, "He's always putting his ViVi on his tab."

"Oh, screw off, Margie." murmured Vivian, brushing her bangs that lay wilted against her forehead, back a bit - the entirely noticeable blush that had sprung across the waist gunners cheeks and the smile poking at her lips evidently hard to ignore.

"I am not, and I repeat, not his 'ViVi', he's just a sweet thing, a gentleman," Vivian offered with a shrug of her shoulders, wiping at a smudge of her red lipstick at the corner of her mouth gently, "honestly." Margie chuckled as Kennedy sent her a glance.

"Whatever you say, Viv, but he's a real charmer that Ev Blakely," Margie said, grinning, "especially that you're ViVi to him, hm?" A small smile quirked onto Vivian's lips as she snapped the hand-held mirror shut and slid it into her pocket and offered them a slight smile.

"Shall we head in?" she asked them with a smile and a nod before stepping inside, cheeks still flaming, "It seems like we're all in need of a stiff drink." Kennedy watched as Vivian then stepped inside, nodding and smiling to a few pilots that had stepped passed her. Slowly, Kennedy glanced towards Margie who simply smiled.

"What?" Margie said with a chuckle, "It's clear Blakely's sweet on her."

Heading inside the flying club, the atmosphere was alive with both a gentle, slow song by Ella Fitzgerald, the quiet chatter of voices still about the place and the mixture of smells which combined two of the finest things on Thorpe Abbotts - cologne and alcohol.

"Beer?" Vivian offered glancing back at both Kennedy and Margie stood in the small opening between the bar area and the dance floor.

"Yeah." Kennedy said quietly, following behind Vivian with a sparing glance towards the dance floor where Judy was, more probable, to be forcing Carrie to dance than anything it seemed.

A large group of some of the pilots had gathered in front of the wooden bar, a few backs turned their way, with a few pairs of wandering eyes meeting her own. At the moment, she made rather quick and inherent eye contact with Bucky Egan. Who was staring down Colonel Harding in front of him.

Kennedy glanced at Margie and Vivian, who sent her sparing looks as she stepped closer, curious to both listen in and figure out why the look in Bucky's eyes made her stomach twist.

"Now-now who's flak happy?' Bucky asked, leaned up against the bar, a morose look drawn on to his features, eyes peering into Colonel Harding's persistent and demanding. Kennedy stepped closer, her eyes looking to Colonel Harding's face - it was a mixture of sadness, grief and evidently being somewhat drunk, but it was somewhat a sorry sight.

"Who?" Colonel Harding seemed to challenge.

"You are." Bucky said with a nod, his eyes frozen on the Colonel's gaze. There was something slightly unsettling in that split second of time - this almost far-too-large group surrounding a somewhat bitter conversation. Flak-happy; what a word. Enough to stir thoughts of death in all of them. How much it surrounded them, consumed them. Buck's half-crescent glance towards Bucky was enough for Kennedy to catch Buck's gaze and see the unfurling repent growing.

"You are." the Colonel said firmly back.

"No, you are," Bucky said, before giving a quick tap of the back of his hand on the Colonel's front pocket, "sir."

For a moment, the low drone of the music seemed to dim to a distant hum as they all stood there, eyes darting back and forth, waiting to see the reaction of the Colonel, to someone like Bucky. Notorious for his outbursts at this point, it seemed.

Kennedy watched for a moment longer, before she bit the bullet and stepped forward, directly placing herself in front of Bucky and looking right up at the Colonel, hands placed behind her back, heart pounding in her ears, praying to God above that she didn't look a fool in this moment. Whatever conversation it had been, friendly or foe or whatever other words could've been tossed around - she was having none of it.

This was for Captain Dye, to celebrate 25 missions, for people to relax a bit. Not to think about what tomorrow or the coming days could bring.

Then, the Colonel began to laugh, eyes not fully connected to the bright laughter from his lips, reaching up to place his cigar to his alcohol-laced lips. Kennedy mimicked her best impression of a laugh that she could muster in this moment without feeling in-genuine and watched as the Colonel's eyes brightened a bit.

"Good to see you, Sergeant Farley." he said and she nodded, saluting as well.

"And you, Colonel." she said and he grinned, before turning away and pointing to the guys - 'Single fillies!' he began to yell and point, people clambering and murmuring amongst one another as the rather large group began to slowly disperse.

She watched, predictable as it was, Blakely saunter up to Viv and Margie seemed to drop to her knees immediately at the sight of a tail-wagging Meatball.

In the midst of this all, Kennedy seemed to only just remember now that she had stepped between the Colonel and Bucky in this very moment and that very same Bucky Egan was now stood just behind her.

And if anything, she knew he had a shit-eating grin on his face and would poke fun at her little heroic moment of relief. She really didn't know what had compelled her to do such a thing - to step in between people that had far higher ranking than she probably ever would. But there was something on his face, that look in his eyes. Like he was distant, in a completely different time zone and realm than where he actually was.

And she couldn't remember a time when Bucky had ever looked like that.

Kennedy found that she was bracing herself as she turned around, but by that moment, as she was turning, Bucky was already watching her. It looked like a mixture between an attempt to smile on his face, and the struggle of an onboarding cold front. And her heart sunk a bit.

Maybe she was a bit stupid for that.

They barely knew each other past their Yankees and Red Sox feud and those few times they'd had conversations together - about what, she wasn't sure - she had spent the greater part of the time noticing every bit about how his eyes lit when he laughed, the crinkle of his grin, the pure sound of his voice.

For what reason she was stockpiling those images and feelings in her brain, she'd never know.

But, standing here now, it felt completely different.

Bucky was different.

"Hi, Farley." he said, voice more exhausted sounding than intended it seemed.

"Hi." she said back, noticing their closeness to each other and the eager smell of his cologne, taking the opportunity to step back.

Then she stared at him - she had no clue what to say.

For the first time in months, she didn't have a clue what to say to him - to explain whatever that had been, to try and chalk it up.

Yeah, she had no clue.

"You alright?" she said him, before scratching the back of her neck.

"Doing the best I can, yourself?" He was bored of this conversation already, he was done with it - say something, say something. But when she took the chance to actually go to open her mouth, she noticed his eyes were far-off, looking past her shoulder.

Slowly, she took a glance and noticed all he was staring at were the people - the couples, the duos - dancing with each other. Kennedy looked back towards Bucky again and found his eyes trained on her again.

"You dance at all, Farley?" he asked her, leaning back up against the bar, the broad stretch of his shoulders enough to fill her entire birds-eye view, enough to make her cheeks tint to annoying pink.

"I regret to inform you that it is quite possibly the last thing you want me to do."

"Really?" Bucky asked with a wry chuckle, smirking at her, "Well, isn't this new. Thought Kennedy Farley was good at damn-near everything." Kennedy looked at him an tilted her head.

"Well, I don't know whether to take that as an insult or compliment, but I'm afraid that growing up my mother put me in ballet and in turned into a complete mess of me on stage - so no, I don't." she said, crossing her arms, suddenly wanting to get herself out of this conversation as quickly as possible.

"I'm intrigued," Bucky said, tilting his head slightly and nodding to her, "tell me more. Ballet, huh?"

"It was like a chicken on a balance beam, alright? I'm sure you could've done better than me-" Bucky chuckled at her mid-sentence.

"Were you really that bad?" he asked her, "I don't believe you."

"Wouldn't be the first time." she murmured and he raised a brow, "This typically would be the time where I ask the same question back, but I've seen you dance and well….clearly know you dance so…." Bucky let out a barking laugh and hung his head for a moment before looking back up at her.

"Well, Kennedy Farley, dancing is a whole lot more than just some stupid ballet classes your Mom put you in when you were a kid, alright?" he said, pushing off from the bar counter and stepping forward. Kennedy look up at him as he stepped closer and equally stepped back.

"What are you doing?" she asked him as he stepped in front of her, managing a small smile.

"Dancing." he said, "With you."

"You can't be serious-"

"Oh, I'm serious!" he said, reaching forward to take her right hand in his, adjusting his other hand to her waist. It was honestly a mixture of feelings, intoxication and his cologne that suddenly made her feel slightly insane.

"Bucky-"

"Nah, nah, you're fine, look at you," he said as they slowly started to sway back and forth, "you're a natural." Kennedy looked up at him, feeling every inch of her hand pressed into his, his other hand on her waist.

"Well, if we're doing this, then you oughta tell me what Colonel Harding was talking about when I came up to you all." she said, watching as his eyes darted to hers and his grip tightened.

"Maybe another time." he said tilting his head to the side, to which she raised a brow.

"Oh, no, no, no, I saw that look on your face-"

"Farley-"

"Major Egan." she said, pausing and looking up at him expectantly. It seemed to work. Bucky watched her, his grip tight on her hand and pouted his lips a bit.

"The war. In the air." Bucky said quietly, tilting his head to the side, "Guess you can say it's making people go crazy."

"Quite the observation." Kennedy murmured and Bucky let out a huff, "Well, why was he addressing you. I mean….sorta front and center there-"

"He thinks it's starting to get to me." Bucky said quickly, pausing as she peered up at him again, watching his eyes under the dimmed yellow lights of the flying club.

Kennedy felt her heart stammer for a moment as she looked up at Bucky - there was still that distant look in his eye, but something else that craved and yearned for touch and connection and possibly something else she couldn't quite decipher. She believed that was all anyone in this war wanted - when the battle was done, when the flight crews were back at base, sweat and grease-stained faces, eyes hazy and glazed. All people wanted was someone else to get it, to understand them and hold them and tell them that maybe things were going to be okay.

But, with Bucky, with their separation of rank and about a million other things, she quite honestly, was at a loss for words.

"You?" she instead asked quietly. Bucky watched her, face unchanged.

"Yeah." he said quietly, almost ashamed, "A trip to London would probably do me some good, don't you think?" Kennedy watched him - he wanted this. He agreed with the Colonel. Bucky wanted this.

"If that's what you want-"

"I think the Colonel was really onto something, Farley." Bucky said, stopping her mid-sentence, "Doing those missions. Over and over. I feel like I'm going crazy." Kennedy felt like she couldn't even hear the music anymore, she didn't even realize how close they were into each other's hands and arms, she didn't even realize the tick of desperation in Bucky's voice. Like he was alone in the dark, trying to grasp onto something.

"Bucky." Kennedy said quietly, watching as he sighed and shook his head, dropping her hand, removing his, rather warm, hand from her waist and stepping back.

"Sorry." Bucky said, reaching up to run a hand through his hair before turning back to the bar and finishing what was left of his drink, before looking at her again, "I shouldn't have said a damn thing. Freak you out when you're trying to relax. I'll…" Bucky watched her and sighed, before stepping around her, "I'll see you around."

Kennedy stood there, the flash of his body disappearing from in front of her, the hint of sweat, beer and cologne trailing as she turned to look over her shoulder and found him moving right out of the room.

Kennedy's heart was in her throat - a mixture of feelings of not knowing what Bucky would do next, especially being alone and if this was making her suddenly want to do anything she could to help him.

So, she did the only thing a Farley would do. She hurried after him. She kept her eye on his form as he hurried out and into the cool night air.

Stepping outside she looked over and found him stood at the edge of the road, against the lick of grass that spread between the barracks and looked towards the dark airfield.

"You know, it really isn't the nicest thing to leave a girl hanging on the dance floor," Kennedy started, walking towards him, a slight smile on her face, "especially if she just told you how much she really didn't like dancing." She tried to joke about it, but she just watched Bucky's shoulders drop the slightest bit instead as he ran his hand again over his hair to hang on his neck.

"Sorry, Farley," Bucky said quietly, "I just, I don't want to rope you into this, right now." Bucky said, motioning to himself. Kennedy raised a brow.

"Rope into what, Bucky, I'm right here." Kennedy said watching his back and crossing her arms, "Quite frankly, you just told me you think you're going crazy from it all and downed the rest of your drink. And probably are slightly buzzed. So. I will rope myself into this." Kennedy eyed the few newer airmen walking by them. "Sir." Bucky glanced over his shoulder at her and she simply stared back.

If he wanted her to be scared of this side of him, it would have to take a whole lot more for her to disappear, for her to run.

This Bucky she almost liked. Where he wasn't putting up the facade, the mask, the strong-front that showed he was fine.

Because no one was fine when their job was trying to just beat the odds and survive.

"Farley-"

"Bucky." she said and she watched as he stared at her. He grew quiet.

Slowly, she stepped closer and moved to stand there beside him. Glancing upwards, she found him, looking far off again towards the darkened tarmacs with B-17s.

There was something about standing there in damn-near total silence with him. It was so unlike any other version of the Bucky Egan she'd met, but in this moment, she hoped that this was exactly what he needed.

Someone to be there, but to stand in this silence with him.

Away from the music and the drinks and the B-17s and the bullets.

Away from it all.

All to simply realize he was alive, and on the ground and standing on his own two feet.

"To get in one of those planes again," Bucky started quietly, "I can't….it's hard. To do that. Again and again." Kennedy looked up at him, her face drawn into one of concern and worry.

"I know." she said quietly, watching his eyes as he glanced at her, "It scares me. Every time without fail. After what had happened with Birdie and then Margie those few months ago. The thought? Jesus, I didn't want to have to leave solid ground." Bucky watched her for a moment.

"You don't give off the impression that you're scared, Farley," Bucky said quietly, "always thought you were one of the strongest we got." Kennedy managed a genuine smile up at him.

"Thanks, Bucky." she said - genuinely - she figured people didn't see that often, so she could appreciate when someone like Bucky told her that. He managed a slight smile at her words.

"Would you go to London?" he asked her and she felt her face change into one of slight surprise and near-joking. She offered him a look, one where she almost burst out laughing.

"Me?" she asked him and he nodded, "No, no….probably not." She looked at him again and almost nervously laughed.

"Silver Bullets needs me. And for the moment, despite everything, I'd rather let that trip go to someone else, who needs it more." Like you, she thought quietly. She looked at him and found his face saddened a bit and offered a shoulder bump.

"Go to London. Take the trip." she said softly, "Take some time to relax." Bucky looked at her, his eyes aching to watch hers it felt as she stared at him.

In another world, she would've said she'd loved to go to London - she always heard about London as a kid; Buckingham Palace, the guards in their uniforms, the city streets, all of it. But for now, she didn't need it. She was fine.

"Well….I only asked because…" Bucky cleared his throat, "Buck sorta denied my offer and I figured, well, since you and just about everyone else also need a break, figured I'd offer to come. With me." Kennedy looked up at him, her cheeks flamed in the darkness and she hoped the fact the moon was covered by clouds, covered her obvious shyness.

"Oh." Kennedy said quietly, her eyes wanting to leave Bucky's but whole-heartedly refusing. In her mind, she told herself that he could tell something was most definitely wrong with her, with her blubbering and lack of words and shock and nervousness. But instead he offered a slight smile her way.

"I mean," she started, a small laugh escaping her lips, "you're….you're a Major, Bucky, and I'm just, I'm a Sergeant. And we're from different planes. And it'd be…I don't know, people, they'd say stuff-"

"Farley," Bucky said, "we're…..friends, ya know, it'd just be us two. As….friends." And even she wasn't convinced of his words in that moment and suddenly she felt hot all over and the thoughts in her mind were enough to force her to look away from Bucky in an instant. She looked forward again over the field of B-17s in the darkness and swallowed her shaky breaths.

"Farley, I…" Bucky started, before clearing his throat, "I just…I think I'm drunk. Just, ignore me-"

"Okay." Kennedy said quickly, looking over at him and nervously meeting his gaze with a nod, swallowing sheepishly as she looked up again to his eyes, "I-"

She really couldn't get herself to speak properly at the thought. Of Bucky. Her head felt light, her cheeks hot, her body hot, her thoughts a jumbled mess.

He was drunk, she told herself, he was drunk and wouldn't remember this and she could go back to being brazen and bold and stubborn with him.

Not this mushy, genuine and sweet part of herself that she rarely showed a soul.

Looking at Bucky, suddenly her mind went into a frenzy at the thought of the two of them, in a room together, in London - how awkward it would be!

She'd take the bed closest to the window, he'd take the one closest to the door and she'd have to hear his every breath as he fell asleep and his snores through the night.

And she'd have to wake up and he'd see her exhausted and barely awake and exceptionally grumpy.

And then he'd say something about how she reminds him of the pigeons on the streets in the city and she'd launch her shoe at him.

And then she'd feel embarrassed having to get ready and knowing he's right in the other room.

And - no, it was too much. Because what if they just happened to ignore it all and she allowed herself to feel these feelings that made her feel sick to her stomach - no. She looked away from him and suddenly wanted to be alone.

No, let him go to London - get the drinks, get the girls, and she'll keep her mouth shut.

Because he was right - they were just two people, barely even friends, who happened to know each other and have strong opinions about baseball. No, she wasn't going to say a thing.

"I'll make it up to you then someday, Farley - the dancing," Bucky said before patting her shoulder gently and letting out a low whistle, "I'm off to barracks. Figured I need to shut up before I keep letting my mouth yap, ya know?" Kennedy slowly looked over at him, sticking his hands in his pockets and giving her a wide smile - one between a forced and slightly buzzed grin and a genuine one.

"I'll let you know how London is, okay?" he said and she nodded, tying herself directly to where she was standing so she wouldn't convince herself to follow him again.

"Okay." she said and he smiled wider and then mock-saluted to her before turning away.

"I'll be seeing you, Farley." he said and as he staggered down the path, her own heart thumping inside her chest she shut her eyes and let out a breath before crossing her arms tighter across her chest.

She couldn't have said anything better? Come up with better words? A better send-off and good-bye? Should she have taken the offer?

No, no, no, no. Nope.

And with that, Kennedy turned and moved right back into the flying club and ordered as strong a drink she could get at this time of night.

[msp9]

THIS IS MY LIKES AND DISLIKES OF CHAOS THEORY ⚠️Spoilers below cut⚠️

When i first finished this season, I too like some people, was skeptical about it. I get why some people say its bad, I just thought it was very different from cc. At points the characters didin't feel like themsleves, the way some of them were written and the designs gave me a real hard time to get used to them. Also i felt as if it was just too much to process at times so i rewatched it and my final answer is that its a good show the pacing is incredeble, the plot, the suspence and character development. i just had a hard time getting used to everything new? Ig. I'm still doubting whether its a 10 but sure thing is that it was a very good first season its a easy 9/10. So here are the thinks i liked abt it:

-THE WAY THEY POTRAYED EVERYONES TRAUMA/STRUGGLES , Sammy having anxiety, Yaz overcoming her ptsd, and KENJI. MY BOY. That must have been the best breakdown i've seen in animated series. Whoever wrote that scene. Wow. It was the best thing in the whole show honestly. His vision gtting blurry, having truble breathing. The panick. Wow. I CANNOT SAY THIS LOUD ENOUGH.

-Ben and Sammy duo? Hello? Im srry to say but you might just be better than Yaz and Ben duo. Idk i really loved them.

- "Benjamin."

- Showing Yaz is doing better. Despite her ongoing struggles, she has clearly grown and matured the last 6 years, and the way she calmed Sammy in the sinking van? Ig all those therapy sessions and college paid off. That scene is a clear illustration of the progress she has made. I mean sammy did say "i can tell shes still struggling" but there wasnt really a clear scene of her getting stuck in place as she used to. So my guess is that it was just Sammys anxiety and the fact that they didint talk much. Bc then Sammy was surprised how she kept herselve together. So yeah

-YASAMMY. NOTHING MORE TO ADD.

-UM SAMMYS CHARACTER?? HELLO? GLOW UP, CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, i loved her sm. She moved up to my top 3.

And her anxiety? It was so well shown too

-the fight between Sammy and Yaz felt so natural and not at all forced. They both had valid points and in the end they did understand each other and were on the same page.

-Ben being Ben in almost every episode

- Yasmina's "boo."

-Brooklynns design?? Majestic to say the least.

- ingore what i said ealrier abt the acting out of character. They do remind themsleves they just grew

Well, all except Ben...

-Kenjis new voice actor, he did a real good job, as much as it doesn't sound like him, he really captured some emotional scenes very well.

- The robot lady. THEY REALLY SAID TAKE A WOMAN AND MAKE HER CREEPY ASF. I was genunanly creeped out. And the detail that at the ranch if u listen closesly u can hear the whistle. Hell nah that was scary.

-Benrius Ben and Darius friendship, okay actually u can't tell me u didint feel it too, the tention between ben and Darius cmon we all know what u are Ben stop making up girlfriends in Europe

-Brooklynn turning bad, or from what we are told worked for bad people ig. Personally as much as it shocked me, im sure theres a good reason as to why and i cant wait to hear more abt in season 2.

-I can now undertand what everyone meant in reviews saying "its more mature" not only in the more death and dinos but it woyud be kind of confusing for a younger audience to undertsand some stuff in this show.

-I really liked Daniels kon death, maybe it wasn't necesarry but im all in for that dark death scene.

-Lastly the comment Sammy makes when Ben asks how bumpy got pregnant, and the yazs smirk. Gurl i was suprised they added that but i loved it

Now, the things that i didint like and why:

- First of all, Darius being in love with brooklynn. I mean i get it but i also dont get it. In my opinion, there shouldn't have been a different reason as to why Darius was the most effected by her death. They were close and she died. Its okay to be really effected by someones death and not bc u liked them, and i also do believe that the reason for him not showing up the night she "died" should have been smth more serious. Then again i get it bc now he felt a lot more guilt bc it was for a not so important reason he didint show up and thats why he didint tell anyone. Well axtually it isnt that bad, but i just felt it was forced for the plot. This again could be bc i started to like kenlynn and now they turned the tables completly but sure.

-Brooklynns voice actor. I just couldn't connect her to brooklynn? She sounded a lot different, not a major bad thing it was just hard to get used to.

-Ben having a gf, or supposedly having one, u telling me this man has a gf:

I thought it funny but yk that man is a homosexual

- and lastly, Brooklynn being alive. This might sound bad but it made sense for her to die. And i was kinda lamed out that she wasnt dead. (Pls ironically enough, just weeks ago i begged for her to be alive.) But like the way everyone suffered bc of her death, going throught the 5 stages of grief, and the way the show was played. It just would have been better if she died, all those flashbacks, the emotional moments, i mean its not gonna be the same when i rewatch it bc i know shes alive. Anyways enough abt this.

Actually i have nothing more to add to my "bad stuff" list but i might come up with smth later. Bc i will be rewatchibg it obviously. Ig lastly i just wanted more episodes how dare they cutting the season of right there.

[howlsofbloodhounds]

might be a controversial/unpopular opinion but i headcanon that any classic variant of sans has some sort of superiority complex going on. maybe not exactly that, but they're some flavor of self-righteous, i guess?

OKAY LISTEN. i'm not saying sans is a bad guy or anything (i love him very much i swear). canon sans is written really well in the sense that he's intentionally very vague and mysterious so we can speculate a lot on his past and intentions throughout the story. idk, maybe my reading is completely off but sans appears to me as a lovable asshole, especially to someone who is a child (frisk). he likes playing around with frisk - yeah it's harmless but still his advice tends to be vague, especially when it comes to battle tips lmao. just imagine in-universe how terrible his advice comes off to a child.

and like, the restaurant scene. sans is intentionally acting all blithe about letting a child die on his watch, under a promise - like i know it's supposed to be a funny off-hand comment to the player, but in-universe again he addresses this to a child. it's just- lmao this guy has some problems for sure.

i think being self-righteous is just tied to his role as a judge as well. he's always 'right' in his judgement, because that's what he is. i think it's just interesting to explore that particular aspect of sans' personality, that he acts in what he thinks is right, and he's always right, isn't he? maybe that's why i tend to enjoy undertale stories where sans somewhat assumes the role of the antagonist - it creates some fantastic dynamic with people around him who it seems like he never really connects well.

~ crowshipping anon

Crow!! Yayy!!

And I honestly kinda vibe with this interpretation honestly. I haven’t completely finished playing all the Undertale games myself (curse my lack of motivation 😭), but I watched a few playthroughs here and there, and it seems like something that could make sense.

Especially when he’s given such an important position like a being a Judge, his opinions and judgements are likely taken seriously by Asgore.

And the thing is, you can also make an argument for this with our most popular classic variants; the Murder Time Trio. Murder justifies what he does as being better that he does it instead of the human, justifies it with that he will eventually stop the human.

Really, he may even argue that his current actions don’t really even go against his job as the Judge; he has judged that the human must be stopped, and he has to do it because he’s the only one who can. I’ve even seen some ideas going around that maybe he views himself as the Angel from the Prophecy, having judged that the Underground will be free by death.

Horror is the entire reason his Underground started eating humans, and he is also the reason that the Core is damaged beyond repair. He didn’t want to sacrifice himself for the Underground, and he survived the event that took his eye, yet he still judged that Undyne and Alphys had to pay for their betrayal—and in doing so he decided that the rest of the Underground would be doomed to starvation or eating people.

He decided to trick Horror Papyrus into eating human meat even though Papyrus very clearly did not want to, and Horror doesn’t seem all too guilty about it—even as Papyrus goes out of his way to prevent Horror from eating humans at his own request.

I’ve even seen around by bigger Horror/Horrortale fans than me that Horror’s reasons for starving himself may not even be entirely selfless—such as for a moral reason or wanting others to have more food than him. But rather because he views it as beneath him and he won’t go “that low.” How canon that is, im not sure, but it’s interesting.

Then meanwhile there’s Killer. He sneers at Swap and threatens to kill him if he ever attempts to compare himself to Killer again, he holds the beliefs and mindsets of his human that were taught to him very closely and looks down on anyone who views things differently with contempt—especially if they attempt to “force” him to view things differently.

Things like mercy or kindness or hesitation are seen as weakness and things to take advantage of in his mind. Even himself is not free from this nihilistic, fatalistic, violence and apathetic driven worldview—-looking down on himself in Stage 1.

He will go out of his way to prove himself and his views right, even if that means doing exactly what Chara did and coercing/provoking someone into killing, attacking, hurting, etc, either themselves, others, or even him.

This is exactly what he was supposed to be, and it’s pointless to try and change or hope for anything more than what he or anyone else deserves. He probably finds Murder’s attempts to justify his genocides absolutely ridiculous. And Horror to be absolutely hypocritical. (Which is why Color’s specific way of approaching Stage 2, wanting to show him a better life—something new—rather than trying to change or fix him, worked so well.)

[sunnywalnut]

Finished watching Dead Boy Detectives. Here are my honest thoughts.

-If you're going into it expecting another Good Omens, stop. Our protagonists are all minors. Teenagers. They cuss, they have total dirty mouths and sexual humor, but they are not eternal beings pretending to be middle aged men. They're ghosts. Dead Boys, if you will. Also this might be a stretch, but I'm assuming from the slightly less good CGI that the budget for this series was a LOT less than what it was for GO

-Edwin is kind of a dick in the first episode. But it's okay. Because character growth is swag.

-REALISTIC CHARACTER GROWTH!!! I liked Edwin a LOT more during the second episode BECAUSE of the character growth. And honestly? It's completely natural that bro is more than a little prickly after only being able to trust one guy for an extremely long time. Fair enough my guy. Carry on.

- this show kinda has Nimona vibes. If that makes sense. Witty humor, somewhat sexual dialogue, funny moments during serious times, though geared towards a younger audience. If you like those kinds of things, you will like this, I'm sure of it.

- In the early episodes, the pacing/character relationships feel a little off??? I'm not sure if that was because I was expecting another Good Omens or what. But after 2-3 episodes, the dust quickly settled and we got into the actual storyline. Which was extremely appreciated✨

-these villains are FUCKED up. I'm telling you. They are HORRIFIC. Had me squirming and cringing through their intense scenes. And gosh. That was a TRIP.

-TY TENANT PLAYS THE MAIN GUY EDWIN!!!! And he plays him WELL. I did not realize this going in to the show and thought his face was VERY familiar. Only after I looked it up did I realize why. He's our sassy son of Job. (EDIT: turns out Ty plays the Doom Patrol version. Not the one on Netflix. My bad! They do look pretty similar though, so ykw. Great casting. Also my point still stands. This guy is a pretty fuckin awesome actor. 10/10)

-Cat King is such a wild card holy SHIT.

-Charles is cute as fuck. His backstory HURTS. But also. I love the way his ears look. Like in the pictures that I saw of him they were of when the Cat King impersonated him so I was like oh chill. So he's got pointed ears bc feline but NOPE. He's just like that!! And honestly? Slay. I fuckin love it.

-oh did I mention tragic backstories???? Yeah we got those :D for everyone :D

-Niko is the best and I love her. Also I love how the letters on her desk are written in Japanese. That is a VERY nice touch of character building.

-hot butcher lady with throat tattoo

All in all. A truly delightful series and I genuinely hope it gets another season because I NEED to know what happens next. My little sister LOVED it and the ending had us all staring open mouthed at the TV screen in shock.

This 15yo girl is literally ranting my ear off, having adventures with the Dead Boys in her dreams and chatting with me about it, searching up fanfics and drawing fanart, the whole shabang. And it is DIFFICULT for this girl to get into shows like this. So honestly? This is perfect. Thank you, Neil. For giving us a whole other banger.

That being said. If anybody else has some younger siblings that are around 15-17 and are looking for shows to binge watch together, this is the perfect one. I'm telling you, you will NOT regret it (except maybe emotionally)

Thoroughly recommend.

[blakbonnet]

AUTHOR OF THE WEEK: @adhduck

Please give it up for the nicest and one of the most creative writers in this fandom: Duck! I'm just such a fan because not only does Duck manage to write the softest, gentlest, loveliest Ed and Stede (both together and apart), their fics somehow perpetually keep me looking like 🥹 all the time ough. And they were very very nice about sharing their writing process with me:

What's your writing process like? Do you start with the beginning or the end? Do you write in order or as the scenes come to you?

Mostly it’s the Taika “look at a document for 8 hours and then close the document,” honestly. I’m a very slow writer and lose motivation very easily, so I mostly get by on the muse’s fire hydrant and forcing myself to write those fifty words even when every single one feels so bad.

I go moooostly beginning to end because even though I’m generally an outliner, I always end up with little details that will affect later scenes and I don’t wanna lose continuity or have to rewrite a bunch. However, I do definitely let myself do a [finish this scene later] and move on to the next scene because otherwise I will get really fucking stuck, and sometimes I’ll write a line or a paragraph I thought of that sounds really good and tuck it away for a later scene.

Favourite trope or headcanon you like to explore while writing?

Ooooooooh, I don’t know if this is a trope but there’s just nothing I love more than huge feelings contained in mundane stories, of feelings so big you can’t actually express them and so they’re this constant hum throughout the story. I also love writing about touch for both of them, how Ed gives casual touch to hide the deep well of desire for intimate touch, how Stede is so unused to touch and craves it so deeply. (Can you tell I just really like subtle yet overwhelming emotions? Maybe it’s the aroace in me idk but that shit hits HARD.) Oh, and I love a fuckin’ allegory or object to discuss all those big feelings, whether it’s monsters or gardening or peaches or what the fuck ever (I have used all of these lol).

Whose voice is easier to write - Ed or Stede? Why?

I think Ed’s voice comes to me faster because the way I personally speak is closer to Ed’s voice, but it also means I’m sometimes double-checking myself to make sure I’m still deep in his voice, not my-voice-but-Ed. Stede isn’t necessarily harder for me, I’m just doing all that double-checking to make sure I’m not slipping into Ed voice or, god forbid, Aziraphale-lite voice. So, idk! I love writing them both, the little details of each of their inner dialogues are SO important to me (Ed’s tangents and his pshh-I-don’t-care moments, Stede actively avoiding thinking about things he doesn’t want to face, etc etc etc).

Your personal favourite thing you've written that you'd like more people to read

For the longest time it was There is Love That Doesn’t Have a Place to Rest, mostly because it was posted the day before another fic and, while I find them to be siblings and equal quality,  the other one got way more attention. That fic is about the time between signing the Act of Grace and getting to the academy and I think I really nailed where the two of them are at.

However! (And I know this is cheating okay shh.) Nowadays the one that I wish people read the most is Not Only the Sugar, But the Days. It’s the sequel to my “offscreen 30 year slowburn friends to lovers finally get together” fic and I put my whole fucking heart into it, honestly. The two boys basically go on a bunch of dates to live out the teenage experiences they never got together and work through the biggest feelings and I just! Really want people to see it! (It also can be read as a standalone, which I didn’t advertise super well lol.)

What is the one word that you think you use a lot?

Unfortunately it’s probably “just” or “a little” or filler words like that. Also obviously if the word fuck counts then, yeah, that. Maybe warm? Or something about yearning??? If I have a classic word please tell me I’m fascinated by this idea.

Do you have a beta reader? Have they made you a better writer?

The person who beta’s for basically all my fics is Owen @trans-top-stede and they are sooooo fucking helpful and incredible. So good at catching all the little things I miss, making sex scenes make sense, reminding me positioning in general is a thing, cheerleading me on, etc etc etc. My fics are so much better for their help.

Why OFMD 🥹

Ed and Stede just fit so fucking well into all sorts of AU’s (they try to invent their own AU’s in canon, even) while also having so much fun space to explore within canon. Their range is also perfect perfect perfect for writing fics—they can be in the wells of misery and fluffy as fuck and obnoxiously cheesy and realistic all in the same fic, if you want, and it’s completely accurate to their canon selves. It’s also helped me to embrace being silly and cheesy and earnest because life is about being yourself and finding your people and feeling deeper, feeling bigger, feeling more authentically without fear of being too much. Fuck I just really love these boys. (Also they’re so pretty and the whole crew’s so pretty we WON.)

Please head over to @ofmdlovelyletters (who also made the header) and send your love to all your favourite authors (and authors of the week 😈 watch that blog for some special letters coming your way)

[moltensmusings]

Hi! I saw your Erza post, about her and her relationship with feminity. In the post you mentioned not liking how Erza's arc was written in canon. Could you please elaborate on it? I'm curious what you didn't like and how you think it could've been better, if that's okay! You're very articulate so I wanted to hear your thoughts, is all :3 <33

Have a nice week!

Forgive me! I saw this a while ago but I'm wrapped up in dragon age and my ft thoughts are a bit foggy so I completely forgot to respond.

My issue with Erza's writing has a lot to do with Mashima handling women in general. He has these really great concepts (specifically early fairy tail) but as time goes on he kind of defaults to the same things for every woman.

I personally think his writing for her and Jellal is just really lack luster. In an effort to get the audience to care about them he basically forbids Erza from ever being allowed to emotionally rely on her friends leading to a consistent flow of scenes where she's doing constant emotional labor but is expected to shoulder her own until Jellal shows up to maybe give her 2 seconds of being allowed to express herself.

I also like that she's surprisingly feminine in spite of how easy it would be to make her more masculine, but her feminity tying into her trauma is never really something that's touched on. I don't like that she's often used for clear fetish content (another overarching issue with every fairy tail girl regardless of how young) and humiliated sexually in fights in ways male characters never would be.

Honestly from her introduction she's had writing issues but she was a fun character. Introducing such a powerful mage as a main character early on is a weird choice. It would be one thing if she was more background only being in arcs when demanded, but her being a consistent main lead makes the world building feel less impactful when we get fights. It means she constantly has to get nerfed or forget her abilities when the plot demands her to not be savior of the day or we want Natsu to get the spotlight.

And overall it just feels like at some point Mashima really lost any concept of what to do with her as a character because she kind of meander going from main plot point to main plot point without giving her as a character any real development outside of her romance with Jellal. This isn't even me being a Erzajane shipper that shapes my dislike of Jellal and Erza, it's just very clear Jellal wasn't intended to be more than a one off character and him being brought back and sanitized was detrimental to Erza when Mashima decided to rush into a romance with them.

I want to note: we finished the show in September and ultimately I really hated it, much like I did when I was a teenager reading the final manga chapters. I'll still love the first season. I think Erza's characterization was great and we didn't have to deal with the overhanging romance bogging her down. It's just when it starts to overstay it's welcome that Erza suffers for it.

[pan-de-queer]

it only took me almost half a year to do a thing. here's to another 5 months of trying to write 5 more sentences 💕

Lena spent three years pretending she could possibly be loved back, but Lex (oh Lex)—Lex could never handle seeing her so happy, could he?

She’d pushed down the bile climbing her throat when she’d pulled the trigger, bit back the tears stinging in her eyes, swallowed the sob scratching its way out her heart, and went home with shaking hands.

It was only in her penthouse, on the floor of her bathroom, that everything came pouring out.

Lena spent three years pretending she could possibly be loved back, but it only took one man and three minutes for her entire world to crumble.

-

The first time Lena thought Kara might be able to love her back was when Maggie had arrested her.

anon's ask got me thinking about my hanahaki au's again and now i can't stop thinking about the two supercorp ones that've been rotating in my brain like lechon

[waitingonher]

hi can u make some Percy jackson x reader in wich reader is a songwriter or plays a instrument

percy jackson dating a musically talented s/o

pairing: percy jackson x gn! reader

content warning: couplely things?

word count: 897

author's note: sorry in advance if any of the info about the guitar scene was wrong. i wrote it purely based off of what i found on google so!

when i say that percy’s your biggest fan…HE IS YOUR BIGGEST FAN.

no matter what you do, he’s always so impressed and awestruck. it literally could be something as simple as you practicing your instrument and he’d be looking at you as if you just finished performing a life-altering concert. even if you’re just quietly humming a random tune, percy would stop whatever he’s doing to listen to you. he’s so obsessed it’s kinda funny. 

percy absolutely loves hearing your own original songs. he could never find flaws in your art. even if you consider one of them to not be your best work, he’d believe it to be the best thing that’s ever graced his ears. 

sometimes you think he’s lying, because how does he manage to fall in love with every single thing that you write?? honestly, i bet you could write a song about dirty laundry and he’d still find something to love about it. 

“hey perce, wanna hear this new song i’m working on?” you ask your boyfriend.  he immediately turns his attention from a random knick knack on top of your dresser onto you, “yeah, lemme hear it.”  you open your notebook to find the page with your newest song, titled peanut allergies. yes, it’s a stupid name, but that was the point. you wanted to write a song so bad that percy wouldn’t be able to come up with a single compliment for it.  “okay, it’s still a work in progress, but-”  percy interjects, “don’t worry babe, your songs are always good.”  you hold back a grin before reaching for your guitar. glancing up at him for a second, you take note of the wide grin that he has on display. you’re anticipating the moment when his smile begins to falter.  as percy listens to your song about the severity of peanut allergy reactions, you peek up at him only to see his smile still standing strong. then, when you finish performing your song, he gives you a round of applause, “babe that was so good!”  for a hot minute, you narrow your eyes at him, trying to find at least a miniscule amount of amusement behind them. none. percy was dead serious. he tilits his head, trying to decipher why you were staring at him so intensely.  “what? that was like, probably the worst thing i’ve ever written?” you say.  he gives you a strange look, as if what you said was the weird thing, “i for one, thought it was poetic.” 

percy’s favorite camp activity are the sing-alongs. not because he likes to sing, but because he likes hearing you sing. he’s gotten very good at singling out your voice and drowning out the others. 

sometimes the morning after a camp sing-along, one of your friends will tell you that they saw percy staring at you. after inquiring more, they’d say that he had his eyes transfixed on you the entire time, never once looking away. later, an aphrodite kid would tell you that even they were shocked by the amount of love radiating from percy. you make a mental note to give him extra kisses later.  

karaoke dates!! 

somehow the stoll brothers managed to smuggle in a karaoke machine…now you and percy are the most frequent users of it. a lot of the times, you’ll bring it to hang outs with your guys friends. you two love seeing their reactions to you guys singing cheesy couple songs. “love is an open door” and “don’t go breaking my heart” are your go-to’s.

despite how bad he is, percy loves it when you try to teach him how to play your instruments. so far you’ve been teaching him the guitar, and he’s slowly picking it up! 

the only reason why it’s taking him so long to learn is because of how much you distract him. he loves the close contact with you. especially when you have to rearrange his fingers or his posture. percy notices the way your hands sometimes linger for a few seconds longer than necessary. 

taking the guitar, you arrange your fingers to play a-minor. looking down at the instrument, you give percy a run-down of how to position his fingers, “yeah so first, you wanna put your index finger on the first fret of your b string. then, your middle finger goes on the second…” you peek up at percy to see him looking at you, “love, are you even paying attention.”  “uh…yes,” he tries.  you give him a look of amusement, “yeah? show me a-minor then.”  “right,” percy takes the guitar out of your lap, and places his fingers on the complete opposite of where he was supposed to.  you chuckle, “um no, that’s actually d-minor. pay attention next time, hm?”  “yeah sorry, i was just uh…distracted,” he says sheepishly. you furrow your brows, “what’s distracting you?”  “you,” percy blurts out without thinking.  feining a look of disgust, you playfully push your boyfriend’s shoulder, “you are such a creep.”  but percy knows that you aren’t really mad. in fact, he doesn’t fail to notice your flushed cheeks and lack of eye contact as you try to return to your lesson. 

in spite of how much he’s been practicing, percy somehow still sucks. he claims it’s because “there can only be one musician in this relationship.” 

there definitely won’t be songs featuring percy any time soon.

[wehangout]

Another @shamelessdvdcommentary requested by the wonderful @suzy-queued with questions made by the amazing @callivich! This one is for Slick back My Hair (You know the Devil's in There)! These are a lot of fun, so hit me up if you want to see this for a different fic 😘

Give us some stats - (when you wrote it, word count, how long it took to finish, is it a one-shot/multi-chapter, etc)

Wrote it in 2015! It’s a long one-shot, and I think my second ever shameless big bang.

What was the initial inspiration for your story?

Okay. Took me a minute. I knew this was inspired by a one-shot I wrote for GW2015 that has since been taken down, but I also knew the one-shot was inspired by something and it took forever to go back and figure it out. Anyway, the initial one-shot was inspired by the Day 7 theme of “Imagine Your OTP – go to the website http://otpprompts.tumblr.com/ and choose a prompt!”. I don’t recall what the exact prompt was (I think digging a grave together), BUT apparently I still have the one-shot posted here on tumblr if you wanna read it! So, yeah, the Big Bang fic was inspired by this one-shot which was inspired by GW2015. Phew. That was a novel on its own

If the story is written from a character’s POV, why did you choose this character?

Mickey. Because I am me.

What was your favourite scene to write?

I’m not sure, but reading back, I really like the scenes with side characters as assasins. Sheila, Jimmy, and Angela. Fun stuff.

How did you come up with the title?

Ugh. This was back when iTunes was a thing lmao. I basically went through all my music, picking out songs I thought might fit the fic’s plot, then went through the lyrics.

Are there any little moments or references you hope readers will notice?

Two! I had fake IDs with the names John Foley and Axel McClane which is a reference to John McClane and Axel Foley – Die Hard and Beverly Hills Cop respectively. And I also had this line “Two inches to the right and it would’ve hit your fucking heart, Ian.” "Two inches to the left and it would have missed me completely” which was reference to The Mighty Ducks. Only one reader picked up on these lol.

Was there anything you struggled to write? If so, how did you overcome this?

The Terry fight scene. And, honestly, I just pushed through it.

Favourite line in the story?

Okay, the “My hero” continuation, but also, back in 2015, I wrote, word for word, “Knew you’d come.” I mean, it’s Ian saying it, but obvi why it’s a fave lmao

What are you most proud about in the story? (plot, characterisation, dialogue, twist/cliffhanger, etc)

I wouldn’t call them twists, but the little surprises that turn up along the way – Sheila being a badass, the texter being Mandy.

Are there any ‘behind the scenes’ info you’d like to share - e.g. what’s going on in a characters head in a certain scene or how you came to write a certain line?

At the end, where Mickey goes to save Ian. Ian’s “goodbye” is legit. Dude was sure they (at least he) was going to die.

Reading back the story now, is there anything you’d change or add?

It’s very quick. I’d probably add more depth to it. (also the title shh)

Would you ever write a sequel to this story?

I’ve considered it, but one half of the dynamic duo gets taken in this one. What other plot could there be?

Are there any ‘easter eggs’ in your story - e.g. references to other stories you’ve written, a trope you often use etc?

I think I did the big Oh moment in this, along with a few others. I think that’s about it.

If you’ve chosen your most popular story, are you surprised by the popularity?

This is definitely not my most popular, lol, but I appreciate the love it’s received!

Were you nervous or excited to post this story?

Oh, always excited

Did you have a beta or a friend who helped you as you wrote?

I did! Again, this was back in 2015 when my pal Ella @hubrisandwax was still around. We had similar time zones, so we’d Skype and write at night (poetry, bitch), and have our own little sprints. She was my cheerleader and beta!

Anything else you’d like the readers to know about the story?

I know this is an Ian and Mickey romance, but I actually preferred the scenes after Ian was taken. Getting into Mickey’s head when he’ll do literally anything to get Ian back? Including torture and murder his own brother? That shit was fun.

[syndrossi]

Bit of a non-resonant question for once:

What program do you use to write with? Any particular fonts or techniques that help get you in the writing zone? Do you edit as you write or write and then edit after you have a skeleton/base finished?

Ah, love me some writing questions!

Writing program

For my very early fandom life, I liked to use Wordpad (rather than proper Word) because it was very simple but still allowed basic formatting and didn't have Word's annoying "suggestions" that I always ignore.

Then I bought Scrivener, which appealed to me because it let you organize your writing into "folders" almost, while allowing you to still easily switch between separate bits of writing and view the work as a whole. I loved it because I'm always playing with concept work or alternate POVs, and it let me organize all the related bits around the main work. I still use Scrivener to organize my D&D games that I DM!

These days, I tend to use Google Docs for easy syncing. I like being able to write and read my work everywhere. I mostly write at my desk, but will reread and edit occasionally on my phone (at home or elsewhere) or on my laptop when I'm lounging in bed. One thing I used to do, in summer of all things, was take a nice long soak in the bath and reread Resonant before starting work on a new chapter. It's too long these days to do that, alas!

I don't love Google Docs itself, because I really do miss the organization Scrivener gave me. (Scrivener would be amazing for the Halloween prompts, honestly!) And the single doc that holds all of Resonant is starting to choke a bit on its size. But the convenience keeps it as my writing tool of choice for now.

There was one other piece of Scrivener-esque paid writing software I looked at a while back that sync'd its content in the cloud, but I remember not being super blown away by it and I've forgotten the name.

Getting into the zone

This is usually a matter of rereading the current chapter or the previous chapter to get my head in the right place, both in terms of tone and flow. Sometimes, if I'm feeling very fancy, I'll light a scented candle. But I'm a pretty basic person. It's usually just me deciding "okay, enough screwing around, let's do some writing" and then I write. (In the past, when I was strict about reaching 1K/day and was struggling with a particular section, I would give myself the "treat" every 100 words of a short break.)

I had a period where I only felt "in the zone" when the sun was still out, which makes things hard when you work a 9-5 job and have to take care of dinner/the dog after. Fortunately, that phase is over and I'm back to writing whenever. That phase was odd because I am more typically a "can't really get in the proper zone until midnight" person. I would say that most of Resonant was written between the hours of 10PM and 4AM.

The hardest things for me to write are new characters and new POVs, as those usually involve me refreshing myself on the body of work for that particular character (rewatching them in the show, and rereading their bits in F&B). Not applicable to OCs, usually, unless they're Essos-related characters, because those involve a lot of interpolating of the few scraps GRRM has shared of the Free Cities.

Editing process

I'm pretty much the opposite of a skeleton writer. 😅 I'll constantly edit myself as I write. There's a certain minimum level of "acceptable" I have to maintain to move onto the next paragraph, with the sole exception being the heavy writing months with my word count minimum where I just wanted to be done for the night. That said, I do on occasion make use of [finish this scene] or [name this later] or [figure out how this works] injections.

And since I reread the current chapter when getting into the writing zone, that usually means doing light editing as I go if an easy fix to something I wasn't happy with occurs to me.

Sometimes, a particular stretch of scenes or chapters doesn't "feel" right, and I have to rewrite, remove, or add entire scenes. That's usually done at the start of a writing session and sometimes takes up the entire time.

The day before posting is the "final edits" day. It's where I fill in any brackets I left behind, and edit the most stubborn bits I wasn't happy with, until everything is close to 100% satisfaction. I definitely do the most editing of a chapter in this span, and often this adds 500ish words to a given chapter. I've had chapters where I was already pretty much completely happy (ch13 comes to mind) and I just had to do a basic grammar/flow check. Those are nice, they take no more than an hour. Others, I'm burning the midnight oil to fill in the blanks and figure out how the heck to fix a particular sentence or phrase of dialogue that's been vexing me.

[cielelyse]

Hii! do you have any one piece ships you like other than zosan? if so, would you want to write about them at some point?

HI ANON WHAT A WONDERFUL QUESTION, I LOVE IT, THANK YOU! I would not be myself if I don’t answer tumblr asks with needless ramblings so I’m sorry to have subjected you to this, though you have brought this upon yourself 

YES! I definitely have other OP ships I like! These are my favourites in order:

1. Luffy x Sanji

I actually love LuSan just as much as I love ZoSan! I have a LuSan draft in my gdocs, which I'm not sure I'll ever finish but it's there! I love them a whole lot. This is also embarrassing to admit, but the only reason why I’m not making progress on writing for them is because Luffy is SO HARD to characterize. Every time he shows up in The Spilhaus Project I’d worry about whether or not he’s in character, whether or not he’s saying the “right” things, whether or not his actions are sound, etc. I DON’T KNOW WHY THIS HAS HAPPENED TO MY BRAIN, I APOLOGIZE ON ITS BEHALF

Funny thing is that every time Luffy shows up in my ZoSan fic, I'm half trying to characterize him well, and half trying not to turn it into a LuSan fic lmao. At some point I'll get that LuSan fic written!

ERGO, I LOVE LUSAN WITH MY WHOLE HEART 

2. Nami x Vivi

They just have such good chemistry! I'm also a sucker for the pirate x princess dynamic. FUCK I LOVE THEM. My queens. I'll for sure have them as a minor ship in The Spilhaus project!

Funnily enough, I was so enamoured by Nami and Vivi's relationship that when Robin showed up, I expected her and Nami to have the same level of chemistry too since they're nakama. But they didn't! And I'm still sad about that! I thought I would love them even more than NamiVivi! Although this scene from Long Ring Long Land lives in my head rent-free:

MOTHERS???? MY SOUL MOANED. I WOULD BE SUCH A DIE-HARD SHIPPER IF THEY INTERACTED LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME

3. Capone Bege x Chiffon

Okay they are just too cute. 100% my favourite canon ship in OP.

4. Robin x Franky

Man I really like them. The contrasting personalities, the "it's not a crime to exist", the humour of Robin berating Franky in Chopper's body... I'm already writing hints of them in The Spilhaus Project but definitely will explore them more

5. Cavendish x Cavendish

Isn't this an iconic one. I will gladly participate in ship wars to defend this pairing.

Some honourable mentions:

Sanji x Usopp

Ngl when I read Skypeia I thought they would become one of the most popular ships in OP. Their dynamic was SO cute and so funny. I wish there'd be more similar interactions between them post-Skypeia (tho Wano and Enies Lobby were nice!) but ALAS

Reiju x Any Girl Honestly, I'm Desperate

Tashigi, Nami, Stussy... I have a huge crush on this woman and I'll take anything

Sanji x Pudding

I'm sorry but they're so FUN. (I didn't realize until after I finished the manga that Pudding is 16.) But while reading WCI I really loved their dynamic, I loved the arranged marriage plot, the secret villain plot, the way Sanji is so kind with her, the way she adores him in turn. Also them both spewing blood everywhere was hilarious

Noland x Kalgara

My doomed yaoi... I very much cried. I love them platonic, romantic, anything in between

There are lots of other ships that I'm intrigued by but haven't explored! I will at some point! Thank you for asking anon, this was such a fun thing to write on a Saturday evening and it made me happy :')

[one-annon]

1. you ask i must deliver.....

governshipping!!!!!!! sometime on the scene of the arson with the fatal five (i had to brainstorm a setting that made sense for both of them in canon) they meet and from then they kind of keep in touch like police/government do and as a result maybe theres some homosexuality thereeee..........................

A PHONE CALL AWAY

-- PETER STRAHM X MATT GIBSON - GOVERNSHIPPING --

hi raz....lowkey dont like this one but its okay i wrote all of it over the span of like 4 days between the hours of 1 am to 4 am..somehow made it to 2.5k though

ive never written officer gibson or agent strahm so please forgive me.....i kinda winged this whole story

if you see mistakes, no you dont <3 enjoy!

having the fbi here this early was, honestly, a little insulting.

gibson had already taken a blow to his pride when hoffman stated he still owed him. this 'owing' equvilated to gibson being his personal assistant. it fucking sucked. he was already pissed and he just wanted to go home and scream into a pillow. maybe cry too. the current situation wasnt doing much to help calm his nerves, either.

he was sent to figure out what happened at some building. eight bodies were found. still, despite their research, they couldnt find shit on what happened. from what gibson gathered, it was some junkie house. he concluded that it wasnt by mistake. the firefighters he spoke to agreed, though they quickly changed their minds once their inspector ruled it an accident. ashley, he discovered, was her name. she was about his height, blonde.

he didnt fully trust her though. and neither did the agent he was currently speaking to. peter strahm. he was taller, more intimidating. gibson didnt really know how to feel about him. he was alright, he guessed, but strahm was nothing special. gibson could do just as much as him. fuck this prick. he didnt even do anything, gibson was just utterly annoyed by his presence. maybe he was just hungry.

"have they attempted to identify any of the bodies?" strahm had finished his talk wish ashley, focusing back on gibson, "or even looked into the place? who all visits here? do we have anyone who mightve had issues with someone here?" the way he spoke reminded gibson of the way he would talk to newbies. it pissed him off even more. of course they went through all that shit. he's done this before.

one of gibson's partners patting his shoulder, looking between the two. "if they say its an accident, well..we don't pursue it. theres no use." the officer fucking hated that thought. how could they be so sure it was an accident? that ashley chick has already vanished out of their sight. they dont know where the hell she went. really, they didnt know what else to do. there was nothing else they could do. the fbi and the police were both gone.

the only people left were gibson, strahm, and gibson's buddy. his buddy who was currently trying to push away some reporter guy. lord forbid the news missed this shocking story. eight dead in a house burning, fbi and police called. for fucks sake, by this point they could just publicly shame the force for the shitty job theyre doing, but like his partner said, there was no use in investigating further.

strahm hummed, tapping his fingers on his thigh like some sort of nervous tic. "well." he started, the words dying on his tongue as he tried to figure out what to say. "if you get anything else, you can contact me." he muttered, taking a notepad from his shirt pocket and a pen from his pants pocket. did he always have those on hand? gibson shifted his weight as strahm wrote. he tore the page, handed it to the officer, and turned to his car.

they didnt speak in person. there was no need to. the only times they ever spoke over text was when gibson had a question about the jigsaw case. really, he wasn't supposed to be involved, but he was curious. eventually, they discovered they had one thing in common; a mutual hatred for mark hoffman. the two of them had their separate reasons - one because of envy and one because of suspicion.

obviously, they kept their words professional. there were no accusations made about the detective, but they both knew they had some very choice words for him. they hinted at it, but never outright said anything. strahm had been suspicious of the man since they met, gibson had been jealous of his abilities since they first shook hands. at one point, he even looked up to hoffman. hah, yeah, what a chance.

at some point, strahm's suspicions had grown. when he woke up in that stupid hospital bed, he knew. he had no doubt in his mind about what had gone down and who was hunting him. that fucker had already taken lindsey from him, of course he was after the whole department. no one would believe him, he wasnt that stupid. well, maybe gibson would.

gibson wasnt the first person on his mind. hoffman and perez were. but he came in a close second. he knew the officer would believe his story. if he was right about all of this, gibson could help him. he could get hoffman behind bars, maybe even get promoted. strahm would get his victim and gibson would get the recognition he so desperately wants, its a win win.

his throat was dry as he called the man. they had never called. there was no need to. there was now though. he had a reason and it was damn good. according to the doctors, he shouldnt use his voice. he would probably be in less pain if he just fucking texted gibson but who knows what that fuck is doing? strahm needs him right fucking now.

"strahm? long time no see, how can i be of service?" gibson had a certain cheerful tone to his voice, one strahm didnt need at the moment,

clearing his throat to the best of his abilities, strahm croaked out "its-" he broke off into a cough, swallowing hard. it took him a minute to gain his voice. "it hoffman." strahm hated how pathetic he sounded. "hoffman’s the..the accomplice." he didn't have any evidence. nothing but a hunch and a hole in his throat. he was still sat in lindsey's room, his eyes fixed on the bloodied pillow. hoffman, the bastard, had just visited. of course he read the fucking papers. he knew that he saved that girl but it all felt…wrong. he needed someone to talk to about it.

no one else shared the same hatred for hoffman. maybe strahm's was closer to obsession, but it was the same thing by this point, wasnt it?

"…where are you? are you sick?"

of course gibson didnt know. why would he? he's not on the case. "hospital." he grumbled, scowling as he stood from the chair next to lindsey's bed. "had to-" he coughed, violent and painful, "had to give myself a fuckin' trache." he paced the room, hand never leaving the edge of the bed. he'd make sure justice was served. he was gonna get hoffman and serve him like a pig on christmas; on a silver platter with an appetizers worth of evidence for the jury.

if it wasnt for himself, it was for perez. he had never been so close to someone before. after his second divorce, strahm opted for detachment. if you weren't attached, they wouldnt care how much you worked, how much you denied yourself the basic needs of living. thats what was different about perez. she was just as bitchy as he was. if he had something to say, she had a comeback. she didnt take shit from anyone, peter included.

and she was gone.

his thoughts were suddenly swept from his head as he heard gibson's voice on the other end of the line. "you should be resting, man, not solving the case." there was no room for argument on that. which, strahm knew that already. he was “off the case.” like fucking hell he was. he's done more work than any bitch in that precinct. it was just barely there, but he could hear the noises of someone climbing into a car. where the hell was he headed?

"i know. where're you going?"

there was a long pause, then the sound of an engine started. "coming to you." gibson sighed, adjusting himself before setting his phone on speaker and starting the drive. "you said the accomplise is hoffman, yeah? i'll hear you out. but i wanna see what evidence you have first. you cant really go making assumptions." he didnt exactly have that. fuck. whatever. he would explain it once the other was here. he would believe strahm. hopefully.

it took about 15 minutes for gibson to arrive. strahm had wandered back to his room for the sake of the other, though it would be funny to watch him stumble around trying to find him, he didnt want to waste time. strahm had been sitting near the window, eyebrows furrowed and mind foggy with thoughts about the case. gibson was right. how the hell was he supposed to supply evidence to the court? all he had to go off of was lindsey’s words, a hole in his throat, and a hunch.

strahm didnt budge as matt opened the door. he didnt move as the other pulled a chair to sit across from him. he paid no mind to gibson, which, it wasnt like he was paying any to strahm either. he had his eyes focused on the tv. it took a long while for either of them to break the silence, both too lost in their own thoughts to speak.

“he got promoted.” matt breathed. “you think..the jigsaw accomplice that you two have been tracking down..is our new lieutenant detective?” he tore his eyes from the tv screen, focusing back on strahm and his dazed look.

the agent scoffed, finally leaning back and making eye contact with the officer. “i do.” he shifted, his fists balling up. his thumb was practically begging for a pen to click. he didnt want to touch - or even look at - another pen for a long while. he’d have to find something else to fidget with. maybe that stress ball perez got him? whatever. no need to think about that now. “how the hell do you expect someone to walk out without a single scratch?” his leg was bouncing. he didnt notice it for a moment. maybe that was his new fidget.

gibson hummed, leaning back and resting one arm over the back of his chair. “who else was in the building? just you two?”

“i dont know. from what i heard, everyone is dead.”

another hum. matt thought about it. from what he knew, everyone offered something during jigsaw traps. hoffman coming out totally unscathed was a bit…odd. maybe it wasnt enough to get him convicted, but it was a nice start. they could work from there. if there was one thing gibson knew about hoffman, it was his ability to act. he could act all innocent. sometimes he would struggle, but he could easily tell a lie.

gibson stared out the window, out to their city. people were dying out there and it was possible that they were dying because of a man he knew. how the fuck were they supposed to handle this then? this was fucking stupid. he tried to offer all he could. “he would be able to lift the victims. hoffman was strong, ill give him that. he was able to lift me, probably could assist in the kidnapping.”

that got strahm thinking. during their first meeting, they had discussed another accomplice. kerry was too heavy for amanda alone, but hoffman couldve easily lifted her. he couldve taken paul to that razor wire trap, maybe with a little help, but it could be done. he started to gain more questions - ones he couldnt answer without the files. he knew they most likely had files on the man. did he have a criminal record? what about ties to the victims? most of jigsaws victims were rather personal to him. could it be possible strahm had killed someone he knew?

strahms brows furrowed in thought. it would make sense. having someone on the inside who would deter the police would be extremely helpful for jigsaw, not to mention the strength.

“do you have access to the files on the case?” strahm asked suddenly, trying to fight the cough in the back of his throat. he knew he had the ability to access the files, but if matt had gone to get them for him, he could avoid suspicion from erickson. fucking erickson. he would solve this fucking case from his hospital room and get more fucking work done that erickson ever could.

his thoughts shifted as gibson shook his head. of course. why would he have fucking access? strahm was starting to think the water affected his brain more than he initially assumed. with the mutter of a swear, strahm stood. he had access. he just had to do everything himself didnt he? fuck, if lindsey was here, he would have this shit done by now!

gibson frowned, standing with him. “peter. you cant just..you cant go out and solve the case! lay down man, take a few days for yourself! just- relax!” it took a bit of forcing, but peter ended up back on his bed. “even just for a few hours. thats better than nothin’! take it from a guy who walked with no boot or crutches when his ankle was sprained; resting is better than anything!”

strahm groaned. he felt like a child trying to worm their way out of bedtime. he didnt want to rest. he wanted to find hoffman. he wanted to go and save whoever was in their most recent game. he wanted to get his ass up and be useful. fucking…whatever. he could entertain gibson for a while. instead of getting out of the bed like he oh, so wanted to, he grabbed the remote to the tv. gibson moved his chair to the side of strahms bed, and they surfed through channels until they found one they were content with.

it may not how he planned to spend his afternoon, but the pair ended up watched hours worth of ‘friends’. it was nice. it felt normal. both boys needed the comfort of normality at the moment. maybe their situation couldve been a little more comfortable, but strahm needed to stay in bed, and gibson needed a break from work.

by the time gibson had to return back to his shit ass job, strahm was ready to get up and out. as much as he enjoyed their time, his fidgeting never ceased. he need to go do something about this fucking jigsaw case. matt had sat up, groaned as he realized the time, and exited the room with a wave and a ‘call me if you need anything’. just as he left the room, strahm stood. he reached into the back they let him keep by the side of his bed, grabbing his clothing, and changed.

fuck this hospital shit. he had a case to go solve. he took his phone, his gun, a flashlight, his wallet, and his keys. traveling throughout the hospital wasnt that hard of a task, he just looked down and avoided anyone who looked at him. successfully, he made it to his car. he checked the back seat, no one. perfect. he was safe. starting the engine and sighing, strahm pulled out, and headed straight for the fbi’s main office.

if he wasnt getting justice for himself, it was for lindsey. and maybe gibson.

[squishyteri]

*Deep disappointed sigh*

I was thinking that I'll be sitting here at this time, writing about finishing another amazing drama, but instead I'm sitting here, absolutely baffled and beyond dissapointment and confusion.

What the hell just happened? That what what I've asked right after finishing the final episode of DFF. And the worst part is that I will actually never know what had happened.

Honestly, the drama started getting worse in episode 10. That was a whole mess (I've written entire post about it, read HERE ). Episode 11 was good in a terms of what it gave us, but it was at very wrong place. It was truly bad choice for the pre-finale ep, that was supposed to build up the tension for the final ordeal, so this Tee backstory felt anti-climatic.

And today, the finale came and it felt like I clicked on the wrong show. Am I really watching DFF? I asked in disbelief. I just couldn't believe what I saw.

I try to go one by one.

Starting with Fluke. That was actually the part I liked. He was the bywatcher. He just watched. So it was really good choice to let him stab his eyes out. But I hated that he didn't even know about it, since he died (most likely) while still being high on absinth. I HATE the choice of having him die. Him living blind, not being able to be a doctor would be such a great punishment for him.

Top ... Well, first of all, how are you still alive, buddy? But given the amount of people (1) that took way too long to die, I guess people in DFF universe are just slower at dying from very obvisouly fatal wounds. Him killing himself and taking Fluke with him was okay, I guess? I mean we know NOTHING about Top, so how could I know what is in character and what not?

Tee and White. Oh boy. I knew right away that us getting the emotional backstory of Tee is not a gift, it would come in an exchange of an inevitable traumatic experience. But this was not what I expected at ALL. If everything else was perfect, this would fit well. I feel like it's a good scene and great punishment for Tee to live with. ... If we KNEW what happened to Tee... but I'll get to that later.

(also like... White's character is so ... idk, he's just a random, innocent dude, who is there only for the purpose of dying ... not the mention he was really annoying to me at the beginning, like what was that about?)

Now here it comes. Jin. I ... I can't say much, because I think even Tumblr would ban me if I went into detail. Let's just say I did not expected Jin to be horny on main. I still don't understand how Jin was the one who posted the video (we had some evidence it might have been someone else), but if he did or thinks he did, it only makes sense his fear would be related to it. But even so, I think his fear should've been more about him not protecting Non. We know that Jin liked Non and wanted to protect him. So why is his biggest fear everyone knowing he's horny on main? We know from Copper himself that Jin should've been percieved as a good character, but him fearing that what he did to Non happens to him is sort of selfish and absolutely not something I thought about Jin. But let's be honest, bad writing was screwing Jin over since like ep 6 (and it was doing it even harder than Phee) (sorry for this one, I'm leaving the room now).

Now Phee. His fear is obvious and he's the only one getting out of the hallucinations and saving the day. (probably) I didn't understand his momentarily need to save New??? Like buddy, you are in this mess because of him??? But him getting the antidote, saving Jin and then coming back for Tee: amazing, hot, I loved it. Only sad that was like 2 minutes of this tragedy.

New. Oh, New. He was a guy broken beyond repair and I knew he will go. I mostly hoped he would end his life himself after realizing what he did and what happened to Non, but he was too lost for that. But I'm okay with his ending.

FINALLY the holy grail of dissapointment. The ending itself. It suddenly cutting to "2 Years Later" got me thinking That's it??? It didn't even have the shock point, because I was confused the entire time. I was thinking why on earth would you end it like that? Why are PheeJin having happy ending (not that I didn't want it, but not like this, not like this, mate) and why is Tee having the bad ending (really, why?) and like what happened? What did police say? Why we skipped two years ... and suddenly BOOM, they smacked me across my face with that "oh, how did we get out then and why is Non over there?" ending. Like WHAT?

HELLO?

REALLY?

Like you really made me sit through 11 episodes, making my judgement and assumptions about every single character, wanting their ending to be whatever I felt they deserve and instead of giving me the shock, happiness, sadness of what you cooked for them you GIVE ME NOTHING?! OF ALL POSSIBLE CHOICES, YOU GIVE ME NOTHING?!

Is this like write your own ending thing or-? WHY WOULD YOU JUST LEAVE ME HANGING.

Not to mention there are lot of things unexplained.

Was Jin the one who really posted the video? There were lot of contradictions to it.

How on earth did New manage to prepare everything and hurt Por? We just heard it from Phee, who couldn't have possibly known. And some things like weren't adding up, even if we have the hallucinations thing.

What happened to Keng? Like, is he dead? But we never saw the body. Really, what's with him?

Who are the survivors? We might assume Phee, Jin and Tee, but are they? Are they all dead? What happened to them? This was literally why we all were here and we don't even get that answer?

That ending was soooooo anticlimatic and out of place. This kind of ending can work, but in a slasher movie where we don't care about characters that much and we are there just for the blood and murders (A Nightmare on Elm Street does this wonderfully, for example) but not in a drama, where we spent HOURS learning backstories of each character (except Top, like who is he?) and want to know what is their destiny.

It's like if the ending of Harry Potter was Harry and Voldemort about to fight, then cut to the 19 Years Later scene, but Harry sees Voldemort on the platform and then cut to broken Hogwarts and then end credits. Like, nah, that doesn't work.

I don't want to make my or yours suffering any longer that needed, so I will end this here. I'm very sad, very disappointed and very confused. I feel like I was robbed. This drama was so good, but the writing team just gave up somewhere around episode 9. It's like when I think of good plot for a fic, but don't come up with the ending and have to write just whatever to not leave it open.

Yep, thank you for reading this. The best part about this drama was without the doubt being able to share my thoughts and theorize with everyone. Thank you guys for it.

Special thanks goes to my beloved friends @tbhimnoteasyonmyself @ayansbff @jeffsatursgender and @toonstuna, who were watching each episode along with me and today (and not just today, for like past month and half) were very nice, kind and patient to listen to me ranting about everything for hours (as they were all ranting themselves). Love you all, guys, really <3

Thank you everyone who has been through this with me. Hopefully next time we will meet again at something less disappointing.

Baya!