#okay I’m done with this topic for now
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Genuinely outside of a few exceptions and moments where they absolutely have to talk to other characters (ie Hunter, Wrecker, Echo, Rex, etc) to advance or resolve a plot point, it feels like Crosshair and Omega haven’t had a significant conversation with anyone besides each other this season and I’m finding myself increasingly frustrated with this “total isolation from the rest of the cast as a substitute for meaningful relationship development” approach as the story goes on.
#tbb spoilers#okay I’m done with this topic for now#just had to get that off my chest#time to post about rebels Rex or Fennec Shand or Jedi fallen order instead#salt
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As much as I love GnR, these guys are not reliable narrators. Why you may ask? Well they were using and abusing substances which affects memory, behaviour etc so there is that. I’ve seen contradictions and inconsistencies which is why I never fully completely rely on their autobiographies ( an example Slash’s version of when Paul Stanley showed interest in producing for them versus Paul’s version, or Mick Wall doing an interview where Axl trash talks Vince Neil where Mick let’s him decide whether to go a head with printing his comments and Axl saying yes he stands by what he said only to walk back after the article is printed. There’s a few which is to be expected we are all fallible with our memories).
I’ve also read most of Vicky Hamilton’s bio which has her perspective on events that can differ, same as Alan Nivan, or how their other manager Doug Goldstein contradicted Duff and Slash’s version of being pressured to sign the rights to the band name over to Axl as not being the one who handed them the papers he wasn’t even in the same country etc.
So that being said I’ll have my doubts about what may or may not have happened at the Hellhouse and everyone should hold skepticism and doubt and not blindly believe but never outright dismiss things. Perspective is a tricky thing which is how sometimes eye witnesses can have completely different versions of the exact same event etc.
We just need to be mindful and respectful when serious allegations are made.
Again I adore Slash but all of them even my precious Duff boy were selfish assholes and while they admit it to an extent all the less than savoury to outright illegal things they’ve done we don’t know them at all. We’re spectators at best that can draw conclusions on what we can see and know but it’s never gonna be enough.
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i think people being upset at the pushback of taylor being person of the year are very out of touch. it really should not take that much brain power to understand what a joke that magazine is and how taylor didn’t deserve to be on that cover. maybe we have different opinions on “influential”, but she has barely lifted a finger regarding political issues. she has failed to use her mammoth of a platform to speak up about the injustice going on, in her home country especially. people conveniently forget miss americana to shift any sort of social responsibility away from her. she gave herself the duty to use her voice for good; for the things she cares about. her activism has been waning. to be honest, there wasn’t much in the first place regarding (white) feminism. i respect her art, i admire her art, and i can acknowledge that her art has brought a lot of people together and touched the hearts of many but i can also criticise her lacklustre efforts of activism for things i used to think she really felt passionate about. don’t even get me started on the “feminist” quote from the magazine that was basically saying it was okay for capitalism to exist and i don’t even know what else, it made zero sense. this isn’t about misogyny or tearing down a powerful woman for most people (if it is, then they suck), it’s about acknowledging the unfair praise about someone’s achievements in the political sphere. it’s just gross that she is on the cover when she has made millions of dollars this year, has shown her eras tour film in “israel”, stayed silent on the genocide of palestinians, failed to speak up about don’t say gay laws or bans on drag queens or the numerous trans people murdered in america this year. so many other musical artists have put their work and their career on the line to raise awareness yet arguably the most powerful one can’t utter a word. meanwhile, she is chosen by that absolute garbage magazine to be person of the year.
you are a hypocrite if you say that she has no obligation to speak about these things or that someone shouldn’t be looking to celebrities for “how to be an activist” or whatever the fuck. i have seen countless times those same people praise her for supporting the lgbtq+ community and other marginalised groups…why are you silent now? do you see how that makes no sense? you admire and praise her for one thing and when people get upset she isn’t keeping up with it, you turn into vultures and say “it’s not her problem”. i guess it checks out that her fans are selective in their activism too.
i wish time had given that title to a palestinian journalist. one of many who are reporting live every single day while their home is bombed ruthlessly. they’ve lost loved ones and see horrors every single day because of the israeli occupation. they are literally living through a genocide, with the whole world watching and turning their cheek. why did zelensky get to be on the cover for his resistance but not them? maybe its a good thing. i mean, they did have trump as person of the year once. those journalists deserve better than that.
#also stop weaponising misogyny#you’re watering down the meaning of that word#okay i’m done with this topic now.#just had to get this out there because it was genuinely making me so upset.#i can’t look at some people the same anymore.#why some people defend her with their life and make countless excuses for her idk.#she’s not your friend.#you won’t get a thank you letter from her.#♡ dear diary…#taylor swift#swifties#anti taylor swift#person of the year
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this election feels so hollow even though it’s likely ostensibly gonna be a good outcome. labour really just sucks fucking ass rn huh
#if the tories lose bad enough to make lib dems the opposition though… a guy can hope#I think it’s the fact that this is the first general election I can vote in that’s making me lose my mind a little here#I have done basically nothing but read today. I DO know a whole bunch more abt voting systems and the nightmare the tories have been now tho#I’m just kinda like. okay so what happens next? bc labour WILL do some decent shit but they also. fucking suck.#planning to look into the local green party once I’m back at uni bc I could actually do stuff there#I think I’m just dealing with a little bit of whiplash going from doing a biology degree where Everything is about climate change#like unambiguously it gets brought up in every topic (I DO focus on ecology and agricultural stuff and not like genetics but still)#clear consensus from literally everyone you talk to that shit has to happen right the fuck now.#it’s not even like I’m unaware of the state of policy rn I KNOW it’s a nightmare to do anything but we at least TALK about it#and then this election where it’s barely a footnote. biggest thing is the sewage dumping everyone’s talking about and yeah fucking finally#but is that all you’ve got?? the labour manifesto is bleak. it has a section and the stuff they’re proposing isn’t bad but it’s so little#and yeah no they’ve changed the official line on the manifesto to ‘make Britain a clean energy superpower’#I SWEAR it was different a few days ago#maybe I’m being pessimistic bc their plans for clean energy if they actually do them could be huge especially if they manage it by 2030.#it’s just that I know what the targets are and they’re already pulling back on shit like EVs bc of the shift right and I am So Tired#two party politics is a curse. as much as reform is an actual nightmare them getting a decent vote share might actually be the thing that#gets people talking abt proportional representation again bc they are nothing if not good at being loud#did you know we had a fucking referendum in 2011 bc what the fuck. and it went SO BADLY even though people generally supported it#god idk I think I’m once again being naively optimistic about people and election coverage has been very good at knocking me down a bit#people generally are good. I have to believe this. but man the british public is making that really fucking hard#genuinely I think a good chunk of that is down to first past the post driving politics to be divisive and aggressive#like is it the only problem? fuck no. but it’s definitely poisoning the way this shit goes bc when all the parties do is jab at each other#what are we actually doing here#idk I’m gonna stop now but this is taking up a ridiculous amount of bandwidth rn I can’t wait for it to be over#already dreading what the next election could look like in 4 years if starmer continues to suck ass bc I don’t trust him to not like at all#luke.txt#I said i was done but I just looked at the lib dem manifesto and oh my god it’s actually pretty good on this? holy fucking shit
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so real honestly
#jade harley#homestuck#homestuck jade#the green one#hs jade#me when#me#uhm#other tag#i dont know#which is kinda#like#on topic#so#beta kids#GG#gardenGnostic#homestuck screenshot#okay i’m done in the tags now#like actually#i swear
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a million more novembers
{mlb!megumi fushiguro x f!reader}
summary: its you and megumi’s cute little two year anniversary! a car picnic at a stargazing hotspot in the city— snacks, drinks, your loving baseball man, and gifts galore? yes please!
warnings: MDNI. afab!reader, cursing, FLUUUUFFF GALOOREEEE AWWWUUHHH!!, sexual themes, mostly sfw except for like one steamy part ;), boobie sucking, grinding, soft loving megumi OFCCC, sliight angst but really nothing, all characters are aged up, mentions of reader having ‘pink cheeks’ is only to amplify and over-exaggerate feelings of embarrassment, shyness, and everything in between, and not to be taken literally! this is a work of fiction, and you can imagine many things for yourself :)
word count: 8.8k
authors note: ANNIVERSARY SPEECCCIIAAALLL I AM CRRRYYIINNNGGG!!! i hope you guys enjoy this little side fun mini chapter of sir gumi and reader’s anniversary day, and their endeavors with yuji and readers best friend :333 wanted to give you guys an extra mlb!megumi chapter in celebration of their LUUUUVVV !!! MWAAAHHHHH I LOOOVEE YOUUUU !!! TAKE CAAAREEEE !!! <3333333
i highly advise you to read the other parts of this series or else you won’t be able to understand some of the storyline and references :( you can find my mlb!megumi fushiguro masterlist here!
if you could, you’d fake pass out at this very moment so that way you’d be excused by your professor and get the fuck out of your afternoon lecture right this instant.
but you couldn’t, because attendance was mandatory and you’d lose points upon missing out… and you had an exam next week— which is something you normally just grumbled about and dealt with seeing as it was just a part of being in college, except right now? it was criminal to even think about an upcoming exam like this.
because it was you and megumi’s two year anniversary.
and the only thing you wanted to do was be there with him for the entire day… but because of your classes and megumi having abnormal back to back practices again due to the upcoming world series, you both agreed that you’d drive over to the stadium after your afternoon class and leave together for your little date after he was done.
but even though megumi had practice, you wanted to be at the stadium so fucking badly— watching him pitch and swing and just do what he does best one of your absolute favorite hobbies, the way he plays never getting old and actually illegal to even think that something like that could be a possibility.
you shrunk down in your seat, arms crossed as your professor went over topics about something and guidelines about whatever, you usually paying more attention to the material if it was any regular day but wanting to strangle yourself because the education system was preventing you from being with your man.
your phone lit up suddenly with a notification, you smiling softly to yourself upon realizing who it was and sitting up, grabbing your phone to unlock it.
(gumi <3): how’s class baby
you quickly typed back a response.
(you): do you think if i pretend to pass out right now my professor will excuse me and i can just leave
(gumi <3): lol
(gumi <3): you only have thirty minutes left though right?
(you): okay but gumi what does that have to do with me wanting to pretend to pass out so i can go see you faster
(you): and make fan edits of you while i wait
(you): I— I MEAN—
(gumi <3): omg
(gumi <3): you’ve made enough of those
(gumi <3): no more
you quietly scoffed in your seat, thumbs rapidly typing away.
(you): gumi i can’t believe you’re not supportive of my extra curricular activities rn
(you): after EVERYTHING i’ve done for you
(you): after all the times i’ve sucked your dick
(you): and i thought you liked my edits :(
megumi took a minute to respond before your phone buzzed again.
(gumi <3): LOL
(gumi <3): i do baby i’m kidding
(gumi <3): and don’t put that image in my head rn
(you): oh??????
(you): and why not???? ;))
(you): boner alert perhaps??? ;))
(you): maybe today during our cute little date you can take me to pound town in the back seat of your car and make me cum and cry all over your dick gumi!!
you shrunk further down in your seat and snickered quietly, funnily shielding your phone to prevent anyone else seated around you in your lecture from seeing the absurd messages on your phone.
(gumi <3): jesus fucking christ
(gumi <3): why are you doing this
(you): because i loooveee youuuu <33
(you): and i can’t wait to seee youuuu <333
(you): maybe i should go to the bathroom rn and send you a boobie pic :P
(gumi <3): please
(gumi <3): fuck wait my breaks over i have to go
(gumi <3): fuck
you mushed a hand over your mouth to prevent yourself from laughing out loud, typing a response.
(you): BAAAAHAHAHAH
(you): OMG IM SO SORRY GUMI
(you): HAVE A GOOD REST OF YOUR PRACTICE OKAY ILL SEE YOU IN A BIT! <3
(gumi <3): do you think if i pretend to pass out coach will excuse me
(you): NO GUMI
(you): GOOOO
(you): GO PLAY GO PLAY
(gumi <3): god
(gumi <3): fine
(gumi <3): i love you pretty baby i’ll see you
(gumi <3): and pay attention
(you): i love you too gumiiii !!! <333
(you): NO PROMISES BYE !!!
(you): SMOOOCCCHHHH
you breathed out softly through your nose and set your phone back down, one leg crossing over the other as you impatiently waited and practically glared at the powerpoint slides in front of you, your ankle bouncing and mind drifting off again— double checking over the list of things you and megumi needed for your date instead repeatedly in case you forgot something.
since your anniversary couldn’t be an all day thing, the two of you planned a cute little car picnic date at a star gazing hotspot out in the hills of the city, a place megumi had actually been to before in his childhood with gojo and his sister, and one he said he remembered to be nice and quiet with a good view of the stars, similar to how they looked like when you all went on that trip in the mountains a few months ago with his dad, yuji, and your best friend— the fact only making you overly ecstatic, since megumi suggesting something like that without a little gruff and huff was always a special rare sight to see.
and the only things megumi literally allowed you to bring were the fuzzy blankets and pillows and such, him forbidding you from buying absolutely anything else like snacks, drinks, and the food, saying that he had it and it was okay— simply only chuckling and lightly flicking your forehead when you grumbled and fought with him over it in the hopes that he would let you take care of at least half of the things.
he did not.
“alright i think i’ll stop here for today and let you guys go a little earl—”
you shot up from your desk and shoved your books in your bag, not even letting your professor finish before you were already up and speed walking out of the lecture hall and down your building, thanking the gods above for the thousandth time that megumi’s stadium was only a fifteen minute drive from your campus, and therefore made it so much easier for you to drive on over without difficulties and pretty much whenever the fuck wanted… which was all of the time.
just as you plopped in the drivers seat and chucked your bag to the passengers side, an apparent buzzing vibrated through the right back pocket of your skirt as you reached in to pull it out, your best friend’s name flashing at the top.
“hellooo!” you answered, swinging the door shut and turning on the ignition, the heater unit blasting through the vents and warming up the spiking chilly temperature in your car.
“hi babe!” your best friend greeted. “how far away are you?”
“i just got out of class! i should be there in about ten if i go over the speed limiiit.” you grinned, putting your phone on speaker and setting it down on your lap, backing out of your parking space.
“SHE SAID TEN MINUTES GOING OVER THE SPEED LIMIT MEGU— what?! i can’t— i can’t hear you idiot you’re across the fucking field!—”
you laughed loudly as you drove out of your campus parking lot, zooming down the street and going the usual route to his stadium.
“oh my— megumi ordered and yelled at me to call you to see how far you were babe.” she sighed. “when is this man ever gonna treat me fairly this is ridiculous— WHAT?! TELL HER WHAT?!—”
“i’m about eight minutes away now!” you laughed. “tell him that please i’m almost there—”
“WAIT SHE SAID SHE’S EIGHT MINUTES AWA— oh my god okay megumi says not to go over the speed limit and to park next to him in the players parking lot.”
“tell him i said watching him play baseball is more important than the law i don’t give a—”
“SHE SAID WATCHING YOU PLAY BASEBALL IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE LAW— oh he’s coming. save yourself and hang up y/n he’s coming— YUJI GET HIM HE’S GONNA TAKE MY PHONE— ARGH STOP!—”
“—go over the speed limit and see what happens.”
a different deeper voice muttered over the line, partially out of breath and one you instantly recognized to be megumi’s as you giggled.
“gumi the speed limit is a social construct and if i don’t get to watch you play for the last thirty minutes of practice i’m gonna gauge my eyeballs out.”
“baseball’s also a social construct.” he deadpanned. “and you watch me play all of the time baby don’t speed you drive like a fucking street racer sometimes.”
“but isn’t it cool and sexy that i do? eehh?” you quipped in a silly way. “and i don’t care how many times i’ve seen you play gumi… i still need to be admitted into a mental facility each time it’s embarrassing.”
he chuckled softly.
“you almost here?”
“yeah! i’m just pulling into the stadium i’m going over to your structure right now.”
“okay.” he spoke. “park next to me please.”
“—megumi i told her that already—”
“can you not eavesdrop—”
“—if it has to do with y/n fuck no—”
“—okay!” you sputtered while shifting your gear to park and turning off the ignition, cutting their bickering off. “i’m here gumi i’m gonna walk to the stadium now.”
“alright i’ll see you baby.”
“i’ll see you!—”
“your phone time’s revoked asswipe give me my device right now—”
“—can you mind your fucking business for two seconds—”
“NO!—”
you winced and hung up the phone, shaking your head amusedly as you grabbed your keys and stepped out of the car before locking it, walking your way over across the parking structure and to the entrance of the stadium, maneuvering through various hallways and corners like muscle memory and politely saying hello to some of the team’s staff that you recognized as you walked.
you passed through the main hall— megumi’s giant glorious handsome portrait still displayed proudly against the wall amongst his other teammates, prestigious awards and trophies in glass frames and casings littering the room from practically top to bottom as you happily moved through the hall, passing by the same bench that you first unknowingly and officially met megumi in while you were embarrassingly crying your eyes out over him— a treasured memory that you swoon over every now and then at the way he kindly gave you his sunglasses to hide your big fat tears.
you hoped that megumi’s management never replaced that freaking bench, as you wanted to put a plaque on it in commemoration of you and your emo man, knowing that if they ever did you’d be at those stadium doors first thing in the morning to grab and take it home with you to keep.
upon opening the doors to the stadium, you continued on down the steps as you looked on ahead and squinted your eyes, distant hollers and the clanking of bats echoing through the otherwise peaceful atmosphere, several players out on the field practicing and pitching but none being megumi as you reached the bottom and went inside the bullpen, expecting to see your best friend sitting there and possibly still fighting with your boyfriend, but faltering instead.
because megumi was sat there on the bench by himself with his baseball cap on… waiting for you, a bouquet of pretty pink tulips in his arms as he looked straight over the field with an emotionless gaze, his head snapping to you once he heard you coming in and standing up, his face gradually warming.
pink tulips were your favorite.
“gumi…” you spoke softly, astonished and mushy inside as you grabbed the bouquet from him, it neatly tucked in brown paper wrap and pretty pink tule with a little matching bow around the stems to tie it off, the paper crinkling in your arms.
“hi.”
“oh my— these are gorgeous baby thank you!” you gushed, your cheeks hot and you absolutely beaming as you swung your unoccupied arm around his neck and brought him in, pecking his slightly sweaty cheek repeatedly as he huffed out a breathy laugh and pulled you to him.
“you’re welcome.” he murmured, cheek lightly resting against the side of your head as you smiled.
“you really didn’t have to gumi you bought basically everything for today…” you spoke softly, bringing your head back a bit to look at him.
he shrugged.
“so.”
you scoffed. “so? you don’t let me do anything and i feel oppressed.”
he snorted, playfully rolling his eyes and kissing your forehead.
dramatic.
“it’s fine baby.”
“okay but it’s not.” you grumbled lowly, and the corners of his lips quirked up, taking a tiny step back as he released you and lifted a hand, gently pinching your cheek.
“you look really pretty.”
your pout slid into a cheeky smile, a cute blush rising to your cheeks.
“thank you gumi!” you readjusted the bouquet in your arms and shyly looked away, his direct dark blue eyes on you still nerve wracking even after two years.
“h— how come you’re not on the field?”
“oh.” megumi’s gaze shifted to his playing teammates. “i wanted to give you the tulips before going back out.”
your eyes softened, chest clenching as you stood up on your tippy toes and gave him a little kiss.
“you’re so nice…” you murmured.
“i—”
“fushiguro i need you back on the field!”
megumi huffed and rolled his eyes at his coach interrupting his time with you, hands reluctantly dropping from your waist as he took a step back.
“m’sorry baby...” he sighed tiredly, lifting his cap up from his spiky hair and adjusting it back on. “practice is almost over i promise.”
you frantically shook your head. “no gumi it’s okay don’t apologize! go please though i don’t want you to get in trouble.”
he nodded, quickly pecking your cheek before stepping out of the bullpen and back out on the field, turning his body slightly just as he reached the home plate and raising a hand to you as a little goodbye, shifting his attention to his coach and the rest of his teammates once he saw you give him one back.
you walked over to the benches then and sat, your eyes happily watching the mock game unfold as you settled your pretty bouquet carefully over your lap.
“please tell me you guys are done it’s fucking cold up here in the stands—”
your head shot to the side and you instantly smiled, your best friend popping her head in from the bullpen entrance and shivering.
“heyyy! oh my god yes come come—” you scooched over and patted the spot next to you, her trodding over and plopping down.
“let me seeeee!” she squealed and nudged your shoulder with hers, gesturing to your tulips as you lit up and turned the bouquet in her direction, her jaw dropping.
“i hate him but he’s good.” she muttered, shaking her head as you laughed and lightly hit her arm.
megumi ran through a few bases, passing by the bullpen and stopping at a base closest to it with remnants of brown dirt puffing and swirling through the air, him looking over his shoulder at you briefly before turning back to the game.
“he does so much for me that i feel like a big fat loser that does mediocre for him.” you spoke worriedly, and your girl friend looked at you bewilderedly.
“are you kidding? y/n you being with him is enough jesus that man is an ogre—”
you flicked her forehead and she cackled, pushing your hand away.
“i’m sorry! i’m sorry i’m joking… kind of…whatever— babe you literally do so much let him dote on you like this… that man loves you.”
you pursed your lips to suppress a giddy smile.
“plus after the pain and torture we both went through with your high school boyfriend christ—”
“oh my god don’t remind me.” you mumbled, shifting your attention back to the field. “he sucked so bad.”
she laughed. “and it took you forever to realize that he was a loser y/n… you gave him too much and he gave you absolutely nothing.”
you solemnly nodded, the feeling of miserable regret filling your body.
“granted i think megumi’s also a loser.” she continued, and you playfully glared. “but! he’s a different kind of loser. he’s good for you babe… and you’re super good for him.”
you grinned brightly at her, set your bouquet to the side, and threw your arms around her shoulders, bringing her in a tight hug as she laughed loudly and held you back with just as much love.
“have fun on your anniversary date tonight!” your girl friend exclaimed. “you guys are still going to that stargazing spot right?”
“mhm!” you nodded. “we’re going up in his car and setting up the backseat once we get there.”
“are you guys getting freaky too back there?—”
your head snapped ahead to find yuji leaning against the gate of the bullpen on the other side, your eyes wide and mortified as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestingly.
“h—huh?—”
“eehhh?” your best friend matched her boyfriends expression, her eyes twinkling and mischievous. “valid question yu! what are you wearing under your outfit let me see—”
you yelped as your best friend pulled and tugged at the collar of your chunky knitted sweater, basically shoving her head through to see what you had on and you pushing on her shoulders to try and get her away.
“stop you sicko!—”
“y/n why the fuck don’t you have a lingerie set under here—”
“oh my god shut your mouth right now—”
megumi curiously turned his head over to the commotion by the bullpen, jaw dropping and eyes growing big in absolute dumb struck horror as he watched your best friend basically trying to strip your sweater off of you, and yuji just standing there and watching like a fucking pervert—
“itadori!” he barked, and yuji jumped a whopping fifteen feet in the air, swiveling around to face him.
“oh hey man!— WHAT THE FU—”
megumi hurled a literal baseball at him and yuji dove out of the way, the ball hitting against the gate of the bullpen as you and your best friend jumped at the slamming noise.
“the fuck are you guys doing?!” megumi yelled, arms out in emphasis as he quickly strode over with pinched brows.
he looked to you as soon as he properly reached the bullpen, the collar of your sweater stretched out over an exposed shoulder with your black bra literally peeking out, your pretty eyes wide and downright alarmed as your best friend still had an iron tugging grip on your sweater.
megumi’s gaze hardened, switching to your girl friend.
“get off.”
he looked to yuji, his legs wobbling in fear as he used the gaps of the bullpen gate to lift himself up from the dirt.
“close your fucking eyes—”
“yes sir fushiguro sir!—”
“what?!” your best friend exclaimed. “megumi if you guys are gonna fuck in the backseat she needs to be looking scrumptious—”
his face paled and his cheeks turned a vibrant pink simultaneously.
“why are you guys always like this?” he muttered exasperatedly, stepping inside the bullpen now and pushing her off of you, your girl friend scoffing as megumi pulled your collar back over your shoulder and fixed your sweater for you, your lips clamped shut as you tried your best to refrain yourself from laughing.
“oh my bad. thought the perv in you would thank my services—”
“why the hell would i thank you for stripping my girlfriend in front of the entire fucking team—”
“—y/n i literally think i have a lingerie set in my car i’ll give it to you it’s new i just bought it to show yuji—”
you gasped.
“wait really?! what color? i wanted to wear one but i didn’t want to show up to class with it—”
megumi’s eyes bulged and shot to you, mouth opening and closing like an idiot.
“i think it’s red but i’m pretty sure your tits are bigger than mine lemme see—”
your best friend yanked your collar again and you screamed as megumi grabbed you and pulled you up against his chest, shielding you away from your lunatic girl friend as she cackled and pointed at megumi.
“megumi’s getting a boonneeerrrr!—”
his eyes frantically switched between her and yuji— his hands still tightly clasped over his eyes.
“what kind of sick fucks are you both?!”
you giggled uncontrollably over his appalled menacing face, your laughter muffling up against his uniform.
“us?!” your best friend yelled. “don’t get me started on you! i saw that text you sent y/n last week asking to send a video of her fi—”
“oh god babe don’t finish that sentence also can i open my eyes now you guys—”
“itadori! fushiguro! huddle up!”
yuji timidly seperated his fingers and looked at the group, hands dropping and a wide smile spreading once he realized you weren’t half naked anymore.
“off we go fushiguro!” he quipped, turning and the dirt crackling beneath his cleats as he walked. “boss man wants us—”
“i heard him.” megumi grumbled, arms loosening from their hold around you as they slid and fell at his sides, his face just plain out annoyed and over it, and you smiled sweetly at him.
“it’s okay!” you poked his cheek. “i’ll wait for you here while you guys finish up? or do you want me to go inside the locker rooms already?”
“go to the locker rooms baby.” he mumbled. “it’s cold.”
you nodded, and he placed a hand on your head with the tiniest smile, heading out of the bullpen after and jogging up to the rest of his teammates for regrouping and final announcements.
your best friend swung a heavy arm around your shoulders and you both made your way to the exit just as you grabbed your bouquet again, walking up the steps of the stands and down a few corridors and pathways until you reached the echoey hallway, the teams locker room coming into view as you pushed the heavy door open and went in.
“do you still want my lingerie set?” your girl friend asked, fixing her hair in front of one of the big mirrors. “we could still try and see if it fits but your boobs are huge compared to mine—”
you laughed and waved her off. “it’s okay babe! thank you though… i don’t think we’re gonna do anything like that out in the open and in the middle of nowhere…”
she shrugged, sending you a little smirk through the mirror. “megumi’s a weirdo. so i think you in fact will.”
you shot her a funny glare and walked to your boyfriends locker while placing your pretty bouquet down on the bench— turning the little knob around and hitting the numbers that made up his locker combination, the metal clinking open and you opening it to organize his clothes and equipment like you usually did.
you dragged his heavy duffel bag out and unzipped it, rummaging around a little to find the clothes that he had packed for your date today— spotting his thick black crewneck and gray cargo pants as you took them out and folded them neatly on the bench in front of you, setting the rest of the things he needed to the side and perking up once you heard distant chattering and banter, several players starting to pile in as you shot a few polite smiles, stepping over the bench and plopping down to wait for megumi.
“i said no.”
“pleeeaaasee!” yuji begged, the two of them emerging from the entryway as you lit up at the sight of your grumpy man, his agitated eyes to the floor as he trudged over. “i thought we were best friends fushiguro. brothers if you will—”
“no.”
“pleaaaseee!—”
“what does he want?” you laughed softly, megumi’s eyes coming up and moving to his tidily folded clothes that you had set for him on the bench, his gaze softening.
“nothing bab—”
“wrestle!” yuji wailed, dramatically leaning his entire weight on your best friend in a hug as she dumbfoundedly reciprocated, patting his back. “i wanted to see who’s strongest…”
“babe go change you’re sweaty—”
“not until fushiguro wrestles with me—”
“no.”
“whyyy?!”
you giggled loudly, hand over your mouth as megumi sent you a small close lipped smile and stepped over the bench to his locker, taking off his baseball cap and hanging it inside.
“because it’s stupid.” he mumbled, and yuji scoffed.
“wrestling is the ultimate sport for strategy, discipline and character how could any of that be stupid—”
“yu change i wanna go homeee!” your best friend whined, trying to pry him off of her. “i’ll wrestle with you.”
yuji sprung up and grinned. “will you actually?! i won’t go easy babe i can’t play favorites—”
“yes now move—”
“if i win can you suck my di—”
megumi flung his deodorant at yuji’s head and rolled his eyes as he cried out and pouted, the little container clattering against the ground.
“gumi!” you gasped. “be nice please.”
he sighed softly through his nose, unbuttoning his jersey as he begrudgingly and briefly looked over his shoulder.
“sorry.”
“oh wait what was that?” you girl friend spoke up. “i think you need to speak up a little megumi! can’t hear you.”
“i said sorry.” he spat, and she smiled, satisfied.
“you’re forgiven! thanks!”
megumi grumbled as he shook his jersey off and long sleeve underneath with it, his little chain with his promise ring dangling out around his collar, and you shamelessly and obviously drooling over his bare toned frame then as he sorted through his clothes and got his things ready for the shower— the locker room emptying out now and only one or two players remaining besides the lot of you.
you extended a hand out, wanting megumi to give you his jersey and long sleeve as he shifted his attention to you.
“what baby.”
“i’ll put it in the laundry bin for you!” you spoke sweetly. “so you can go shower.”
his heart squeezed as he shook his head. “s’okay. just wait for me.”
“gumi the laundry room’s just down the hall.” you laughed, taking his uniform from him. “i’ll be quick.”
he pursed his lips, feeling like you’ve already done more than enough for him and him just dicking around and playing ball for hours this entire time, wanting to get your date started so he could spend time with you and give you the things he wanted to give you, and not be around idiot insane people anymore (yuji and your best friend).
“sit down please.” he mumbled.
your jaw dropped.
“i’m being oppressed again—”
“we’ll see you guys tomorrow!” your girl friend smiled, coming over and giving you a hug as yuji went to put a hand on megumi’s shoulder. “have fun on your date! and happy anniversaryyy!”
“thank youuuu!” you responded kindly, hugging her back and swaying funnily, letting her go after and looking to her boyfriend. “drive safe yuji okay?”
“will do!” he smiled brightly, wrapping a friendly arm around your shoulders and pulling you in. “have fun you guys. and don’t get mauled by bears.”
you snorted, the both of you pulling back and waving at each other with final goodbyes before they turned and began walking to the exit, now the only ones left in the locker rooms being you and megumi.
“text me if you have sex in the back y/n!”
“oh my god!—” you miserably dropped your head in your hands as your girl friends vulgar sentence literally echoed throughout the hallway outside, anyone within a one inch radius able to hear it as megumi laughed quietly, the doors to the locker room officially closing.
“your best friend is clinically insane.”
you giggled, nudging him away playfully and him catching your wrist just as you did so, tugging you in and wrapping his arms around your shoulders.
“no she’s not.” you smiled cutely, your little cheek pressed up against the warm skin of his chest as he looked at you. “she’s honest. and lovely.”
“and deluded.”
“gumi!”
“sorry.”
he craned his neck down and kissed you, every tense muscle in his body giving away and slowly oozing into a state of peace as your soft lips moved with his, megumi finally having you to himself for the night so he could properly get your anniversary going.
he pulled away and patted your head.
“m’gonna shower really quick baby.”
“okay!” you smiled. “can i sit by the shower with you? heh.”
he chuckled and nodded, interlocking his fingers with yours and pulling you towards the shower room— a spacious and modern area with individual stalls and little plushy sofas across from them, megumi leading you to one as you sat down and took his fresh pair of clothes from him to set on your lap.
“remember when i fucked you in here.”
“gumi!” you gasped as your face grew red. “okay but which time because my favorite time was two weeks ago when you bent me over th—”
he laughed, the boyish sound bouncing off the tile walls as he shook his head with a little faint blush to his cheeks, fingers coming down to unbutton his pants and your hands flying to cover over your eyes, him pausing and looking at you quizzically.
“what.”
“i’m giving you privacy gumi. something you wouldn’t know about in regards to me.”
he scoffed.
“kay fine. i’ll stop asking—”
“no!” you yelled, hands clasping together like a prayer. “don’t finish that sentence i don’t wanna know i don’t need to know whatever it is continue doing it—”
megumi rolled his eyes with a smile, taking off the rest of his clothes and you squeaking as you covered your line of sight again, the sound of the shower running with the door closing an indicator to you that the coast was clear for you to look, hands coming down as they settled over megumi’s clean clothes.
and he literally took less than five minutes to shower�� or maybe it was because your little endless chattering made the time go by faster or the fact that you always took close to an hour, but he was out of there with a towel around his delicious waist before you could even realize and on the way out to change into his outfit.
megumi straight from the shower was always an interesting sight to see, for the usual spikes in his jet black hair were nonexistent for the time being as his hair just laid flat, and he almost looked like an entirely different man as you stood on the other side of the bench behind him while he sat tying his shoe laces, you drying his hair with a small white hand towel.
“i’m really excited for tonight gumi!” you cheesed. “oh! and i brought my laptop too incase you wanted to watch a movieeee.”
he straightened up from his hunched over position and stood, turning around to kiss your head in gratitude before taking the towel from you and drying off the last bit of his hair.
“sounds good baby.” he grabbed his duffel bag and swung it over his shoulder, keys hooked from one of his belt loops on his pants as he offered his hand out to you on the way out of the locker room, you happily taking it and interlacing your fingers in the hallway, the both of you walking on to leave the stadium with your bouquet in your arm, making a quick pit stop at the laundry room first to toss his uniform and towels in one of the various hampers, leaving and going through the main hall hand in hand after with the building basically vacant now— not a single player, staff, or management member around as you moved your way down corridors to the exit, entering the parking garage.
megumi grabbed his keys and clicked a button upon reaching the players parking lot area, his shiny black car beeping and flickering its lights and him opening the door to the backseat to throw his stuff in, you catching a glimpse of the piles of grocery bags filled with chips, snacks, pastries and such as you smiled, unlocking your own vehicle and opening your trunk as megumi did his.
he swiftly stepped in and grabbed your blankets and a few pillows, transferring them over to his car and you setting your bouquet down in the back, throwing in a few other things.
“oh gumi!”
“hm?”
you opened your drivers side door and reached in, megumi peering around from his open trunk to look at you.
“i got us a little lunchbox cake!” you pulled out a small white cake carrier and showed him. “and a number two candle too so we can light it!”
“oh nice baby.” he calmly smiled, reaching into the pocket of his cargo pants and pulling out his wallet.
you blinked.
“what are you doing?”
he gave you a confused look, opening the folds and taking out a few twenty dollar bills.
“for the cake.”
“what?!” you frantically shook your head. “no i got this for us—”
he scoffed, extending his arm out to you regardless with a pile of bills in hand that was way over the initial cost of the little cake, your jaw running slack.
“oh absolutely not sir i’m not taking that—”
“take it.”
“nope!”
“y/n.”
“nuh uh.”
megumi sighed and retracted his hand. “i’m putting it in your purse—”
“if you put it in my purse i swear to god i’m never letting you see me naked ever again—”
he froze and narrowed his eyes at you, you standing there with a shit eating grin as you tilted your head.
“just get in the car.” he grumbled, slamming his trunk shut and doing the same with yours, you cheering in your head and lighting up over your win as you opened his passenger side door and got in, completely unaware of megumi choosing to take his chances and shove the bills in your purse anyways.
the car ride there was a whopping one hour, seeing as the stargazing hotspot was in the middle of the bustling city where megumi’s apartment was around, your boyfriend making frequent stops at various food places to pick up the food he had ordered for the picnic, and you still fighting with him over the fact that he should let you pay at least half, him just laughing at your huffs and puffs until he simmered you down to a mere grumble with a kiss to your cheek.
“i don’t care how many times i’ve done it there isn’t a limit.”
megumi backed in reverse once he found a good spot for you both on the hill, looking behind through his rear view window with a hand on the back of your headrest.
“but you have to let me pay sometimes gumi.” you sighed softly. “i feel like im freeloading off of your millions and doing fucking nothing.”
he gave you a bewildered look.
“first of all.” he shifted his gear into park. “you do everything so don’t give me that. second of all—”
he unlocked the car and you both got out, the trunk latching open on its own as you walked over.
“you’re not supposed to pay baby.” he stared at you sincerely, a little crease in between his brows. “ever. i don’t care.”
he unhooked the backseats and pushed them down, the trunk now extending even wider and leaving plenty of space for the two of you to set up your picnic, your shoes off and down below next to the car.
“i just—” you struggled, shaking out the blankets and splaying them out. “i worry that it’ll bother you eventually…”
“it won’t.” he responded firmly, yet still gentle. “did your ex-boyfriend make you feel bad about it? is that why?”
you froze.
“no…”
he looked over his shoulder just as he set a pillow down, dark blue eyes staring you down.
“wow i’m so hungry right now gumi are you—”
“i heard what your best friend said during practice about him.” he set a few more pillows down. “she talks like a linebacker.”
you laughed, grabbing the box of fairy lights you had brought and pulling them out, untangling them by sections.
megumi never really asked too in detail about your ex, just because he knew he’d get bitter and bothered by the thought of it, and the only things he really knew was that he was a moron who said you were a blabbermouth and didn’t treat you right at all, your three and a half year relationship with him in high school one megumi wished he could erase entirely.
but now with the way you squirmed and stared off into space in avoidance over this particular topic… he was curious.
just how bad was he?
“did he pay for your dates or did you.”
you fiddled with a little fairy light bulb.
“well— he did… but then we started splitting it… and then i started paying…”
megumi shook his head, reaching for the grocery bags and taking out the snacks he’d bought.
“why.”
you finished untangling the cord and reached up, looping the lights around through the grab handles of the car.
“i don’t really know…” you mumbled. “but i felt bad because he always did initially pay… so i was just giving back. but then—”
you looped it through the last handle and grabbed the battery box.
“i remember one time he asked me if we could split the bill on our anniversary dinner.”
megumi stopped.
“and then every time he did pay for me he would say side joking comments like— ‘are you gonna pay this time? are you gonna take care of the bill? since i bought you dinner are you gonna buy me this?’ blah blah—”
megumi was looking directly at you at this point, eyebrows furrowed and with slightly parted lips as he slowly set up the food and listened.
“and i don’t mess around when it comes to things like money.” you finished off screwing the battery box after putting a fresh pair in, switching the small lever and the fairly lights twinkling to life. “i appreciated so much every time he did pay so i just felt like i was— i don’t know i just felt guilty. his side comments made me feel a little awkward…”
you scooched over and sat back on your ankles next to megumi, helping him with the groceries.
“i remember one time too for valentine’s day, we had gone out to eat dinner and he paid with his usual side comment… but when we got back to his place i had given him his gift and he hadn’t gotten anything for me at all.”
“huh?” he spoke up. “did he give you flowers at least?”
you shook your head, a little sad look on your face.
“he told me my gift was dinner… which again i did really appreciate that he paid. and he never really got me flowers either unless it was for special occasions like anniversaries… so once a year?”
megumi was in complete and utter disbelief.
how in the ever living fuck were you ever with a guy like that for so long? a girl like you whom he literally worshipped the shit out of the ground you walked on, the thought of you being so incredibly sweet and doting and selfless for some dumb fuck who just took advantage of your kindness again aggravating megumi, him chucking the pastries he bought out of the bags one by one bitterly and you blinking at him.
“what a fucking idiot.”
you giggled, nodding in agreement as you both finished setting up, you crawling and sitting down by the mountain of fluffy pillows as you extended an arm out for him.
“that’s why i just get nervous gumi…” you spoke softly, pulling him to lay down next to you as you looked at the beading stars through his open sun roof, the view and landscape of the sparkling city below insane as megumi slid an am around your shoulders, nudging you to lay on his chest. “i don’t wanna end up bothering you or upsetting you about it and repeating the cycle so—”
“oh god baby no…” he looked at you, squeezing your shoulder. “you realize all of that was because he’s a loser right.”
“yeah to an extent—”
“no not to an extent.” megumi cut you off. “i know for a fact he never did anything for you… and for him to do shit like that on top of it is crazy.”
you slid a slow arm across his torso and held him tighter.
“i do what i do because i love you… and because you deserve it. and because i’m supposed to.”
you smiled big, your heart hammering in your chest as you slung your leg across his lap and straddled him then, megumi’s hands instantly coming to settle on your waist as you gave him a cute wicked look.
“i’m tired of talking about him, but you know what else you’re supposed to do?”
the side of his lip curled.
“what pretty baby.”
“make out with me.”
he laughed, a shiny smile on his face as he reached a hand up and brushed your hair over your shoulder, cupping your face after and bringing you down to his level.
“if you tell me you love me.”
you giggled.
“i love you gumi.”
megumi brought you in then and kissed you, light little smacks and wet lips parting and moving as your noses brushed against each other’s delicately, his thumb running gently over your cheek as you readjusted and leaned in, deepening the kiss and megumi parting his lips wider as a result to drink more of you down.
your hips subconsciously rutted downward, him taking a sharp breath in through his nose as he responded and lifted his crotch up, meeting with yours and grinding sensually with every steamy exchange of your soft plush lips on his, both of his hands quickly going down to grab your smooth thighs and knead them.
megumi suddenly slid a fast hand up your chunky sweater to cup your tit, you squeaking and trying to pull your lips off of his so you could speak, but him only chasing after your mouth and trapping you in.
“wait what if— mmph!—”
“hm?”
he forced your hips down again and you both moaned at the stimulation.
“what if someone walks by there’s a— fuck— there’s a few cars not too far—”
“don’t care.”
“gumi!—”
he yanked your bra cup down and your tit spilled out, his head diving in under your sweater and popping your nipple in his mouth, both of your hips still grinding and rocking against each others as you dazedly tried to look around for any passing people.
you tried to pull off and megumi yanked your other bra cup down, jerking you roughly to him as your weight gave out underneath you and you basically fell on him, his face fully submerged and stuffed in your puffy tits that he nearly lost it and came in his pants.
lewd slobbering sounds filled the car as he sucked and laid his tongue flat all over your boobs, your shuttering gasps and whines making his dick rock fucking solid in his pants as he continued to make out with your chest, relishing in the feeling of your panties running up and down his crotch and your pretty little skirt exposing your ass.
“baby i’m flashing the city please—”
“m’gonna stick my dick in.”
“no!” you whined, your clit pulsing with every rut from his hips. “when we get home when we get home please it’ll be so obvious we’re having sex if we do—”
he bit the fat of your tit and you yelped.
“it’s our anniversary.”
“i— i know gumi but there’s people!—”
he groaned and let your tits go with a pop, head falling back on the pillows as he looked at you with a dead look— knowing you were completely and absolutely right but refusing to believe it because he was fucking horny, the only conscious brain cell that he had left telling him to just wait and that he’d actually cum in his pants if he kept going.
a tiny smirk spread across his face.
“thought you texted me that i could take you to pound town in the backseat of my car.”
you blushed, totally forgetting you did that.
“y—yes but—”
“and that you were gonna send me a picture of your tits.”
“i—”
“you lying to me baby?”
“no!” you sputtered. “no gumi we’re still gonna have sex just not here!”
he laughed loudly and nodded, pinching your cheek as he fixed your bra and pulled your sweater down, sitting up a bit.
“i’m kidding s’okay.” he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. “m’taking pictures of you when we get to my apartment though.”
“huh?!” you exclaimed, your face buzzing with embarrassment but need at the same time. “what— what kind—”
he poked your side.
“naked.”
your jaw dropped.
“legs spread with—”
“okay i get it i get it!—”
you slapped your hands over his mouth and muffled the rest of his sentence, desperate to get him to stop.
“i have your gift i have your gift open your gift!—”
megumi rolled his eyes and licked his slimy tongue on your palms, you snatching your hands away and giggling as you wiped them on his sweater.
“i told you not to get me anything.”
“too bad!” you grinned, pecking his cheek before swinging yourself off of his lap and reaching into the passengers seat. “close your eyes!”
he sighed softly, a small smile on his face as he complied, hearing slight tissue paper rustlings and things moving before he felt you next to him again.
“okay open!”
his long lashes lifted, eyes growing soft at the ginormous basket you made him— his favorite candies and chips neatly propped up inside with a little baseball teddy bear that had ‘cool baseball man’ embroidered across its jersey, a framed silly picture of the two of you from one of the nights you slept over at his place, various volumes of his current favorite manga wrapped in black tissue paper along with a lego race car set, and a separate shoe box next to the basket— a brand new pair of baseball cleats that he had been specifically eyeing and needing to buy, and knowing that it was ridiculously expensive too as his bulging eyes shot up to your giddy ones.
“baby—” his words got caught in his throat, shaking his head. “baby thank you but you didn’t have to get anything seriously—”
“the fuck.” you snorted. “yes i did! do you likeeee?”
you pushed the shoe box towards him.
“did i get the right ones? these are the cleats you’ve been wanting right?”
he nodded dumbly. “y—yeah but they’re expensive i don’t want you spending this much.”
“gumi money is a social construct.” you smiled. “but my love for you isn’t… it’s bible! happy anniversary!”
megumi looked down and slowly took the little grizzly bear out of the basket, everything you gave him absolutely perfect and filled with the things he loved, but the custom bear with the nickname you always called him— the same one he adored ever since you first said it, somehow pulling at his heart strings more than anything else.
“i love you.” he mumbled. “thank you.”
you beamed, leaning over and pecking his lips.
“because you do everything for me gumi.” you spoke. “i can’t thank you enough for the things you do for me… and i love you.”
a cute pink blush rose to his cheeks as his gaze stayed locked on the bear, feeling his throat closing up from how much you were affecting him at the moment.
he sent you a smile.
“can i give you mine?”
you stopped.
“what? i thought the pretty tulips were my gift?”
he snorted, giving you a look.
“no you dummy.”
he reached under one of the seats, pulling gift bag after gift bag after gift bag from somewhere as he placed them all in a line in front of you, a shocked look on your face as you looked at the amount of tissue paper and packaging that was in your line of sight.
“holy shit.” you flashed him a growing dazzling smile. “are you— for me? actually?”
he nodded.
“guummiii!!” you flung your arms around his neck and pulled him in a tight hug, rubbing your cheek on his head side to side in a silly way before you let go and sat back on your ankles again, him chuckling at your excitement.
“i don’t even—” your eyes darted around. “i don’t even know which one—”
one by one you unraveled each wrapping and tore open each bag, your lap filling up with things that you fucking loved as you tried not to cry between opening each gift— pretty intricate coquette bottled perfumes that you liked to collect everywhere as you knew they were also a pretty penny (so him complaining about his cleats was dumb), cute mary jane pumps and makeup you needed as well as new that you’d been wanting, silver and gold sparkling jewelry that resided in small boxes and wrapped in pretty pink bows, sweaters and cute tops and just fucking everything as you ended up a crying snotting mess at the end of it anyways, him laughing at you.
because each item were things that you needed, things that you knew he couldn’t have possibly known unless he was truly paying attention to the things you were saying and the things you were looking at… this moment proving that he most definitely was.
and a crazy wicked amount too— because some of the items in front of you were even things you had merely mentioned once and done with, accompanied by others that you babbled on about whenever you could.
“gumi we can have sex right now let’s have sex i don’t care—”
he laughed for the millionth time and shot his hands out, literally trying to pull you off of him as you lunged and leaned your entire weight on him, practically fighting him by the end of it as you giggled and tried to get in his pants.
“you’re harassing me.” he mumbled, and you scoffed.
“like you don’t do this to me everyday of my living life— eek!”
megumi bit your cheek and you pushed on his chest to get him away, him not budging as his nibbling travelled down to your neck as you gasped for air laughing at how much that was tickling you, and him knowing that was what usually set you off into a giggle fit, your stomach aching and him dodging your hits and swings, but both of your hearts full from a days worth of complete and utter unconditional love.
and neither of you would have it any other way as you shared the food and pastries you bought, stuffing your faces full of chocolates and mochi specifically as you both had insane sweet tooth’s and weren’t ashamed of it, chatted on about future plans and your excitement for megumi and the upcoming world series, and you elated for the holiday season too that was fast approaching, your little mind already thinking of gifts and plans and decisions because your boyfriend’s birthday was coming up as well.
and you wanted to do everything you possibly could to make it special.
for he made you feel that everyday.
especially now in this moment, the little heart shaped lunchbox cake you bought with ‘happy 2nd anniversary’ in cursive still looking fucking delicious even after you and megumi had just downed an entire pack of brownies, megumi lightning up the number two candle as you pushed it in the cake, and the both of you sweetly pecking lips as you held up the cake in between the two of you and him snapping a picture with his phone— candid and lovely and everything you’d both ever wanted in your lives rightfully yours right then and there.
happiness. love.
and your hearts were swelling with everything you had built for the past two years, and swelling in anticipation for the hopes and curiosity of what else the two of you would continue to build… something you only hoped would last forever and ever and that you got to count and spend even more anniversaries with megumi from this point forward.
with nothing less, nothing extra, and just like this.
for a million more november’s to come.
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Fable - Before
Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Summary: Being in love with Azriel wasn’t hard; you’d been doing it for over 400 years. But things were changing, and soon, you would be changed.
Word count: 2k
Warnings: Angst, pining
a/n: This is part of a mini-series but each part can be read on its own/out of order. I know I'm like attacking everyone with this random fic I just started but it's getting my writing muse going and it's exciting!! Enjoy :)
Series Masterlist (all parts ♡)
~~
“Do you think that’s the best idea, Az?” you promoted, cringing a bit as you hid your face in the racks of clothing along the store’s edge. “I mean, Rhys seemed pretty adamant that you… I don’t know—not pursue her?”
Azriel tsked, pressing his hand to the middle of your back as he passed behind you. You turned your wings in. “Rhys doesn’t understand. He only understands the pull of the mating bond and nothing else. But Elain doesn’t want Lucien, I’m sure of it.”
Something twisted in your gut. “Okay, I believe you. But what if—”
“Please, y/n, something else now. My failure of a love life must bore you.”
You bit into your lip as you contemplated ignoring his request. He had done nothing but speak of Elain since you started your outing this evening, but the moment you questioned the feasibility of his plans, the topic was suddenly moot.
“I was just going to ask,” you broached, turning from the clothes to face the shadowsinger. A necklace display enthralled him. “What if you found your mate? What then?”
Azriel broke his gaze with the jewels. “That wouldn’t matter. This is different, y/n. You must see that. Three sisters for three brothers. It’s as if it’s a test of fate.”
“Right,” you nodded, fighting off the urge to throw up or scream. “Destiny, maybe.”
Azriel’s responding grin did little to soothe you. “Exactly. I knew you would understand. You’ve always understood me.”
You offered a weak smile, biting the inside of your cheek as he ushered you out of the store with a gentle hand on your shoulder.
This was getting more and more difficult to tamp down.
When Azriel first became enamored by Elain, you thought it temporary. He had been chasing after Mor for so long; that wouldn’t be trumped by a woman he just met. And you were used to the way he pined for Mor. It hurt, but it was familiar.
Azriel never seemed to think he had a real chance with her.
But with Elain—with Elain, he figured he had a fighting chance. He saw the success of his brothers and felt that this was his chance at happiness. He never looked at you the way he looked at her, and he had had so many opportunities to do so.
He never spoke of you the way he spoke of her.
This hurt more than it did with Mor.
But still, Azriel was your family, so you pretended that it didn’t. You sat back and listened as he spoke of his grand plans to court her and sneak past Rhysand. You tried your best to provide good input and smiled when you were supposed to.
You loved him from afar.
He loved you differently.
It wasn’t his fault.
“Did Rhys ever say what he wanted to talk to you about?” Azriel asked after a short stint of silence, the sounds of your steps along the streets of Velaris rhythmic and soothing.
You blinked and focused your attention back on Azriel. “Oh, um, some mission at the camps I think.”
“Anything big?”
“I don’t think so. A little unrest but I think he just wants me to make sure the women are training.”
“Need me to come?”
“I would, but I leave tomorrow night. Isn’t that when you—you know…”
Azriel sucked in a breath through his teeth. “Oh, that’s right.” He tilted his head to the side, weighing his internal conflict. “I could try to move some things around. Elain could—”
“No, Az, it’s fine,” you interrupted, trying to forget about the times he would restructure his entire schedule to accommodate you. “You have to be diligent with the times you see her. I can see if Cass can come with me.”
“Are you sure?” he posed, the question twisting his brow.
You looked up at him, examining each tell on his face. You’d known him so long you were sure you would never forget his face—never scrub your mind of the intricacies that told you of each emotion he felt.
Many claimed that Azriel was hard to read. As a Spymaster, that was the goal. But you saw through it all. You’d seen him as a boy and you saw him now.
There was something unfamiliar on his face as you looked at him now.
“You really like her, don’t you?” The words hurt as they came out.
Azriel breathed through a smile.
“I like my chances this time.” He curled his finger beneath your chin in a playful tap.
That sounded the same.
~~
“You sure you don’t want me to come, sweetheart?” Cassian asked for the fourth time, the table between you filled with a plethora of distractions that you were all too grateful for.
You darted your gaze to the side, eager to ensure that Azriel hadn’t heard the loudmouth in front of you. “Yes, Cass. Now quit it. I got it, okay?”
Cassian sent the pair at the end of the table a perfunctory, almost irritated glance. “It’s a pretty hostile camp you’re headed into. I feel like you should bring backup.”
“And I feel like you have four other camps to go to today. And a pregnant mate to tend to, no?”
“Nesta would sooner bash me over the head with her books than let me coddle her. I’ve tried.”
“Well, just… linger around her, I don’t know. Just know that I’m fine and don’t need a babysitter.”
From the other end of the table, Elain giggled, the sound light and airy. You snuck a glance out of the corner of your eye to find the shadows along the table retreating to the floor. A few had begun to creep towards you, but you shooed them away with a flick of your foot, wanting to keep the conversation away from Azriel’s ears.
They listened to you—for the most part. 500 years of pestering them made them give a little.
“Az can’t come?” Cassian asked, his mouth half filled with roasted potato. “He’s not on anything this week.”
You raised your brow and stared back at the sheepish look the general offered, waiting for him to chew his breakfast before you replied. “He can’t. Spy business.”
“Spy business.” Cassian deadpanned.
“Uh-huh.”
Cassian’s skeptical look rivaled your chastising one. “This doesn’t need to go like this and you know that.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Right. I’ve only known you since we were twelve but I’m going to pretend that you aren’t covering for the one person you—”
“Cassian.”
“I don’t want to see you hurt.”
“Why would she be getting hurt?” Azriel spoke up, his head finally turned from his near-permanent gaze on Elain.
“I wouldn’t,” you cut in, speaking over the beginning of Cassian’s sentence. “You know how Cassian is, always worrying too much.”
“Is there something to worry about?” Elain asked, looking between the members of the table, her question sweet and ironic coming from her mouth.
“No—”
“Yes.”
“No, there isn’t” you gritted out, throwing Cassian a look. The smile you sent to Elain took effort. “I’m just going on a routine mission, but you know how Illyrians are—overprotective to a fault.”
Elain nodded and blushed with a soft gleam in her eye, and, Gods, you were reminded why you’d stopped eating breakfast at the House. You bit the inside of your cheek to fight the swell in your throat.
“I thought Cassian was going to go with you,” Azriel questioned. “You said he could.”
Cauldron, you really should have taken breakfast in your room.
You tore your gaze from Elain’s shy expression and blinked at Azriel. He was sat up straighter, brows shot upwards in an accusatory fashion that made you feel that you were in trouble. When you took a moment to respond, he tilted his chin forward, ready to catch you in a lie.
And you were an awful liar.
When you were thirty, Azriel had to teach you how to lie to help stave away the men that came with emerging adulthood. That had been mortifying for many reasons, but mainly because he was having you lie about being his mate. Your feelings had become complicated around that time and Azriel did not seem to share the sentiment.
But you could lie about this with ease. You had become a practiced liar over the years—when it came to hiding your feelings.
“I-I got an update from Rhys. He said the camp is more settled. I’m only going to watch from afar. They won’t even know I’m there.”
A lie—a fat lie. But Azriel should be happy. He should pursue Elain as he wanted. You shouldn't get in the way. You needed to get away from them, actually.
You needed the space.
You felt Cassian’s disappointed stare on the side of your face but ignored the hole it was burning into your skin.
“He didn’t inform me of that,” Azriel muttered. He looked to Elain—sweet Elain with her soft eyes and gentle features—and contemplated his night once again. “I think I should come with you. Reports could be conflicting or fabricated.”
And the way Elain deflated made you press your lips together in a line. Azriel sent her an apologetic, downturned smile and you gathered that he was apologizing for you. You would always be an apology for him, a responsibility.
Your foot had been shaking under the table without you noticing it, but the moment Azriel’s eyes wandered to Elain, the motion abruptly stopped. You gathered your resolve, sent Cassian another warning glance, and looked back to the man who never saw you.
“I don’t want you to come, Azriel. I’m bringing Lucien.”
A low blow, but not one that was uncalled for.
It had the effect you were hoping for, with both Azriel and Elain sending shocked expressions your way, the former affronted and the latter looking lost.
“Lucien?” Azriel parroted.
“Yes,” you confirmed, taking a causal sip from the cup before you. “Rhys thought it would be good for him to see more than just Velaris and the mortal lands. I’m picking him up before I leave.”
“And you think he would protect you if the Illyrians went rouge?” Azriel’s tone was bordering on aggressive, his question pointed towards Cassian.
“The Illyrians are always rouge, Az. That’s kind of the point of all this,” you joked, but the joke didn’t land.
Tension at the table remained. Cassian wasn’t saying anything, his arms crossed and his eyes locked on yours. Your foot started shaking again. Elain, of all people, was the first one to speak.
“Lucien would protect her,” she nodded, pushing her food around her plate. “He would. He’s… a good male.”
That altered Azriel’s train of thought very evidently if one were able to pick apart the soft widening of his eyes and the slight twitch of his mouth. All things you caught so easily.
All things that led him to agree that you should go with Lucien. All tells that made him refocus his attention on Elain and ignore the shallow breaths you let out when you lied.
Because you would be fine with Lucien. Maybe if you went with Lucien, one of Azriel’s suspected obstacles would be removed. Maybe Lucien would start to want you the same way he wanted Elain.
Only, Lucien wasn’t going with you, and there would never be a time that a conversation like this would happen again.
A different obstacle, for a different time.
#azriel x reader#azriel x you#azriel x female!reader#azriel x y/n#azriel acotar#azriel shadowsinger#azriel spymaster#azriel#azriel fanfic#acotar fanfiction#acotar#azriel angst
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I have a request for Lando Norris x Sister!reader where she gets cheated on. Please🫶🏻 I love your writing
Enjoy reading and send some requests!!!
-xoxo babygirl 🧡
Part 2
Big Brother to the Rescue
The paddock was buzzing with activity, fans cheering and cameras clicking as drivers moved between interviews and meetings. It was a typical race weekend—hectic, thrilling, and intense. But for Yn, none of it seemed to matter.
She walked beside Lando, her older brother, keeping her head down. Normally, she loved being at the Grand Prix. She’d tease Lando about his starts, laugh at his banter with the other drivers, and soak in the high-energy atmosphere. But today, her heart felt heavy.
Lando, always in tune with her moods, glanced down at her and frowned. “You’re too quiet,” he said as they reached the McLaren hospitality area. “This isn’t like you. What’s wrong?”
Yn sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
That was all it took for Lando’s protective instincts to kick in. “Oh, you’re definitely talking about it. Did something happen? Who do I need to fight?”
Yn couldn’t help but chuckle lightly at his immediate leap to violence. “It’s nothing. Just...my boyfriend cheated on me.”
Lando froze mid-step. He turned to her, his expression shifting from shock to anger. “He what?”
“Cheated,” Yn repeated, her voice cracking slightly. “With some girl he met at a party. I found out yesterday.”
Lando clenched his fists, his jaw tightening. “That absolute—” He cut himself off, taking a deep breath. “Okay. First of all, you don’t deserve that. Second, I’m going to make sure you’re okay. And third, if I ever see him, he’s toast.”
Yn smiled faintly at his overprotective tone. “Thanks, Lan. But I don’t think anything can cheer me up right now.”
Lando wasn’t having it. “Challenge accepted.”
---
Throughout the morning, Lando hovered around her like a mother hen. He brought her tea, her favorite snacks, and even a McLaren hoodie to keep her warm. The other drivers began to notice.
“Why is Yn so quiet today?” Carlos asked, walking over to where she sat with her tea. “You’re usually giving Lando a hard time.”
“She’s going through something,” Lando replied, his tone making it clear the topic was off-limits. He wrapped an arm around Yn’s shoulders and pulled her closer. “But don’t worry. I’ve got this.”
Carlos raised an eyebrow but didn’t push further. He ruffled Yn’s hair affectionately before heading off.
A little while later, Charles and Pierre stopped by. “Yn, you’re not smiling,” Charles said, crouching down to her eye level. “That’s illegal. Lando, what have you done?”
“For once, it’s not my fault,” Lando said, rolling his eyes. “She’s just—she’s sad. Leave her alone.”
Pierre, never one to resist a joke, smirked. “Do you need us to scare someone off? We’re good at that.”
“I can scare people off just fine,” Lando said firmly. “Thanks.”
Yn managed a small laugh, which made Charles and Pierre exchange victorious looks.
---
Later, when Ollie came by, he took one look at Yn and immediately tried to lighten the mood. “I’ve got an idea,” he announced, sitting down beside her. “What if I became your new boyfriend? I’d treat you like a queen.”
Yn laughed for the first time all day, the sound catching Lando’s attention from across the room. He walked over, arms crossed.
“Really, Ollie?” Lando said, glaring at his friend. “That’s the best you’ve got?”
“What?” Ollie said, holding up his hands in mock innocence. “I’m just saying, I’d be an upgrade.”
Yn shook her head, still giggling. “You’re ridiculous.”
“Ridiculous, but effective,” Ollie said, winking at her.
Lando wasn’t amused. “Stick to racing, mate.”
Ollie shrugged and walked off, leaving Yn smiling. “He’s an idiot,” she said, leaning her head on Lando’s shoulder.
“True,” Lando agreed. “But if it made you laugh, I’ll allow it.”
---
As the day wore on, Lando continued to dote on Yn. He handed her tissues when she teared up, reminded her to drink water, and even skipped a strategy meeting to sit with her in the quiet corner of the hospitality area.
“You know,” Yn said softly, “you’re a really good brother.”
“Obviously,” Lando replied with a smirk. “But thanks. And for real, Yn, don’t let that guy make you feel like you’re not enough. He’s the idiot, not you.”
Yn sniffled and smiled up at him. “You’re the best.”
“Duh,” Lando said, pulling her into a hug. “Now, what do you say we watch the race together? I’ll dedicate my first overtake to you.”
Yn laughed, feeling lighter than she had all day. “Deal.”
By the time the sun set over the paddock, Yn was back to herself, and it was all thanks to Lando—her overprotective, slightly annoying, but always reliable big brother.
#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris x sister!reader#lando norris x y/n#norris!reader#carlos sainz x reader#charles leclerc x reader#pierre gasly x reader#ollie bearman x reader#oliver bearman x reader#xoxo babygirl 💋
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helloooo, how are you? i’ve been rewatching criminal minds and i finally got to the post-prison part, so i’m really missing shy!r and post prison spencer <33 if you’re felling up to writing something for them again, i would love to see it!! maybe when they kiss for the first time or something else (completely up to you, i would love anything that you write hahah) but if you’re not really feeling it at the moment, please don’t worry about it, it’s so understandable 🩷 have the best day!!
ty for your request I love first kisses <3
Spencer takes you for a walk and explains a couple of courting rituals. shy fem!reader, 1.5k
Profiling is still very hard, but seven months into your new job at the BAU, you’ve become proficient in Spencer Reid. You can tell when he’s eager to work, when he’s down about something, when he’s feeling good. He holds himself differently on his good days, he takes care to coil his hair and wears a clean pair of shoes.
In the bullpen, he’s sitting at his desk beside yours, craned over a desk covered in loose papers, books, and files. You attempt to hide your approach, lest he startle.
“Good morning,” he says.
“Good morning.” Can’t hide anything. He’s been an agent for ninety percent of his adult life. “What are you doing?”
“Just reading.”
You sit at your desk, clearing a space for your bag among your own mess of files and books. Your monitor turns on with a nudge of the mouse. Your screen is filled swiftly by notifications and Outlook, then the FBI messaging system, and then the ‘filing cabinet’ Garcia built to help you understand the insanity that is the BAU online system. It submerges you every morning regardless.
“What are you reading about?” you ask. Your emails can’t wait, but you don’t want to read them, so you won’t for another ten minutes.
He stumbles over a breath.
“Spencer?”
“It’s courtship rituals.”
You regret asking. Whenever you and Spencer talk about feelings, or love, or romance, you end up hot as a kettle on a stovetop, steam billowing from your ears. You choked on a mouthful of lukewarm tea a few days ago when he’d mentioned America's developing hook-up culture.
He doesn’t tell you any more, which is unlike him. Spencer Reid loves to talk, or loves to share what he’s learned. You looked it up —it’s called info-dumping, and it’s usually because the person telling you is so deeply fascinated by the topic they’re investigating that they can’t contain it. It’s a common symptom of ADHD, or autism, or both. Spencer’s done it since the day you met, which is nice. You feel like he trusts you.
And so you’re wondering now if you’ve done something to make him think he can’t do it today. Or maybe he’s not feeling well.
You prop your face in his hand and watch him.
He doesn’t look upset, only focused.
You hate quiet. You love not talking, but gaps of silence have you overthinking things. Maybe he’s mad. Maybe you’ve finally pissed him off.
It’s scary because he’s amazingly kind. Overwhelmingly nice. He’s lovely and good looking but it’s his heart that shocks you every time, how he’s looked after you, defended you.
“Spencer, are you okay?” you ask.
He blinks to attention. “What?”
“You’re not talking.”
He grins. “I’m thinking.”
His smile when he looks like he’s about to laugh is everything.
“Don’t think too much,” you say as you play with a button on your coat. “Isn’t that what you always tell me?”
“Don’t think too much because you think about things you don’t need to,” he amends. “You worry about everything.”
“Well, so do you.”
“Exactly. I’ll worry enough for you, too.” Spencer gives you a smile you don’t understand. “Will you come to the archive with me? I want to talk to you about something.”
“Spencer…” He just acknowledged that you worry about everything.
“Sorry,” he laughs. “Something with no pressure. I’ll explain it as we walk.”
You shed your coat and walk together out of the BAU offices down a long hallway. You take the elevator down to the ground level, spring air in the hallways, early morning sunshine lapping at your shoes where it’s settled golden against the marble floor. Spencer professes that it’s nothing to worry about again, but he doesn’t elaborate, and your heart begins to pulse too quickly.
You can’t look at him.
“I’ve been reading about these courtship rituals and… looking at which ones are the best. There are thousands of them, but contemporary courting isn’t easy. It confuses me. With my last, my only girlfriend, we wrote each other letters. But I wanted this time to be different, because– because love is different?” He grimaces.
“Love is different,” you agree. You’re not sure who he means, your chest panging in two different beats. Is he… talking about you? “It’s different every time.”
“I was looking for the more subtle rituals. I kept thinking I’d find the right one, and that I’d know it when I saw it, but I can’t find anything suitable and I might need your help. Um, if you even want to help me.”
“Of course I do.”
Spencer slows just outside of the archive’s door. “Everything I read about feels like it would just embarrass you. I picture buying you flowers and I feel like you’d just– just explode.” He says it with affection and apology alike. “I wrote you a poem. Emily told me not to give it to you, though.”
“You wrote me a poem?”
“I made you a love spoon, too, but I can’t whittle, and it looks terrible. I even cut my hand, and if you rejected me you’d have to give the spoon back and I think that would make it worse.”
You turn completely still. The last thing you expected that morning was for Spencer to confess. And he is confessing, a small smile on his face, patience, nervousness, close enough to feel the heat of him beside you. You short circuit in an attempt to compute the magnitude of it; Spencer wants to court you, and you can’t handle it.
Your exhale shudders out of you. Goosebumps attack your arms.
“Sorry,” he says quietly, “are you okay?”
“Spencer, I don’t think you could ever find a way to tell me that wouldn’t make me feel like this.”
“How do you feel?”
“How am I supposed to feel?”
Spencer’s smile fades a touch. “I don’t know. You can feel how you want to feel, it isn’t up to me. But I have feelings for you. I thought you knew.”
It’s like knowing that the lottery numbers were chosen specifically to match your ticket. The thing he’s talking about doesn’t make sense.
“Are you kidding around?” you ask.
“What? No.” He holds your wrist gently. “Of course not.”
You swallow a lump and try not to overreact, though you’re already doing that. This is a good thing, it is, but he’s him and you’re you and every time he touches you it’s like fireworks are bursting warm and tingly over your skin. You smile at his chest, cheeks dimpling from how wide it stretches.
“You don’t have to court me, um. Not in any way like that. I’m just like every other girl, you know? I like flowers. I,” —your cheek lists down toward your shoulder bashfully— “probably would feel a little embarrassed, but I like flowers. I can get you flowers.”
Spencer really laughs. “You want to get me flowers?”
“Maybe?”
He laughs again. His eyes lock onto you and his open hand closes on the opposite arm, putting you face to face. “It was my idea,” he says, playfully argumentative.
“Okay.”
“You want to hear the poem?” he asks, quietening again.
You nod slowly. “N’I wanna see the spoon.”
“Can I please kiss you?” He takes a breath, like he’s been running. “I know this isn’t the right place, but I didn’t expect to want it this badly.”
“I don’t think there’s a wrong place…”
“So I can?” he asks, lifting a hand to your cheek, to hold you with care.
You nod into his approach, find yourself kissed and held tightly in a split-second of warmth and warm smells. His nose touches yours in a kiss of their own, his lips part lightly before pressing in again. Two kisses lend to a third, but then he pulls away to look at you. As quickly as it started, it’s over.
“You're overheating already,” he says, thumb rubbing a sweet path under your cheek.
You don’t know what to say. He ducks his head just that little bit to make sure you’re okay. Understanding flows between you both. His hand falls behind your back to pull you in for a hug.
“I’ve never been the confident one in any of my relationships,” he admits.
“I usually am.”
Your deadpan lights him up. His hug turns strong armed, and he walks you back, giggling, arms a comforting vice around you. “You can be the shy one this time,” he says, seemingly unaware of how his using the word ‘relationship’ has thrown you for another loop.
You’re hot as a furnace all morning. Spencer makes excuses for you, but Emily’s amazing at her job.
“Jesus, Spence, you didn’t read her the poem? I told you it was too much.”
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction
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The Ballad Of Dr. Reid
Pairing: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid
Description: When you zone out in the middle of one of your lectures, your professor asks you to stay after class to check in on you.
Content/Warnings: Power imbalance, Professor/Student, age gap (Spencer is in his 40s, reader is in her 20s), minor hand kink, porn with little plot, heated kissing, fingering, spit, unprotected sex, exhibitionism (kinda, right?), reader gets a facial
Word Count: 1.9K
Kinktober Day Two: Power Imbalance
Navigation || Kinktober Masterlist || AO3
You’d always had a liking for criminal justice, so taking the courses in college seemed like a no brainer. You really liked Criminology 1424. It was an interesting class, one that piqued your interest far more than the other classes you were in the process of taking.
In addition to being genuinely interested in the subject, you were more interested in the professor of the class; Dr. Spencer Reid.
He was soft spoken for the most part, a little on the awkward side but that was okay. He was experienced from his fifteen years in the Behavioral Analysis Unit and would use cases he’d faced for examples in his lessons. His lectures were long and albeit pretty boring at times but you had no problem watching the man at the front of class talk, his hands emphasizing just how prepared he was for the topic at hand. You’d realized that there were topics he definitely enjoyed getting into, his body language and his overexaggerated gestures being proof of it.
You’d always thought the FBI and the darkness he faced on a near daily basis would exhaust him, make him harder and more stoic, the seriousness of the world on his shoulders. No, instead he offered smiles, helped any student who came to him, and was painfully oblivious to the amount of young men and women auditing the class just to admire the attractive professor.
It was like any other lecture, delving into the intricacies of triggers and what could bring them on. It was a lesson he liked, judging by his animation this evening. You’d done your best to keep up, to get plenty of notes jotted down due to this being on the impending final. However, you were too busy drooling over the curly haired beauty, his veined hands flailing with each word that fell from his lips.
What you wouldn’t give to have those hands on your body, to feel the gentle touch of your professor as he was letting his fingertips memorize all the dips and curves of your body, to familiarize himself with how to pleasure you.
His hands on-
“Y/N? Are you alright?”
You were snapped from your thoughts. The sound of your name falling from his mouth was like sweet honey, drizzling over your eardrums as you could feel your face heat up from embarrassment. Great. Now the whole class is looking at you.
“Y-Yes, I’m okay. I’m sorry, just, uh, not all the way here today.” You explained, slowly looking back down at the notebook covered in scribbles. So much for getting any work done today.
The class passed by painfully slowly after that. Even the attractive man in front of you didn’t seem to speed up the clock. You’d sat quietly, giving up with the notes aspect as you’d switched to doodling on the edges of your notebook. You’d done your best to try and be one of the first ones out whenever your professor dismissed the class full of students. However your shoulders slumped with defeat when the sea of bodies filed out first.
There was no clean getaway.
“Y/N, do you mind staying back and having a chat?”
Fuck.
Mustering up enough courage to face the man you’d gotten distracted fantasizing about, you were approaching his desk. Even up close, he was a beautiful man. Even in his early to mid forties, he still looked delicious. “I apologize for getting distracted earlier. I was just-”
“Looking at me? Y/N,” There was a deep breath that left his lips. “You can tell me if this tie is ugly. My coworker Penelope insisted I wear it. I love her but some of her ties aren’t really my style.”
He was joking, easing the awkwardness and the unknown tension filling the lecture hall. Maybe he’d been feeling the same way about you. He looked at you a lot as is, however you may have just been in a delusional state of mind right now. There was a hope that Spencer would reciprocate those feelings. “It’s not.. It’s a little ugly but that, uh, wasn’t what I was, uh, staring at.” You decided to just be honest. Worst you can do is transfer out of the class.
Or run away to a new city, start over again at a new university.
“Really?”
“Really. Sir, with the risk of coming across as inappropriate, it’s hard to pay attention to you at the front of the class. It’s not a bad thing. You just always look…” You paused and gave him a once over. “Really nice.” You spoke.
There was a blush that spread across the older man’s cheeks, an eyebrow raising. “You think so? At risk of sounding even more inappropriate and unprofessional,” He paused as he leaned forward a bit, arms crossed over his chest. “It’s hard to teach when you come in looking as beautiful as you do. Makes me just wanna stare at you the whole class.”
The words were lower than usual, a rush of warmth going straight to your core from the mere compliment.
“Plus when you come in with a new lipstick shade..” His lanky body was pushing off the desk before he approached, his fingers resting gently under your chin before tilting it upwards. “It drives me insane. You may think I don’t notice but…” This was crossing the boundary of teacher and student, his thumb swiping over your lower lip. “I do. Makes me think of these pretty lips wrapped around me, those eyes glossed over with pleasure.” He hummed, chuckling at the way your breath hitched, eyes locking with his.
You didn’t know what came over you at this point, however you could help yourself as you were launching yourself forward, mouth smashing against his in a quick kiss that he seemed enthusiastic to reciprocate. His hands were gripping your waist, pulling your frame closer to his chest as the kiss filled with desire and hunger was escalating.
The next thing you knew, you were being sat against the desk at the front of the lecture hall, your eyes widening. “H-Hold on, don't you have another class??” She asked immediately as she let her hands squeeze the broad shoulders. “Yeah, in twenty minutes.” Spencer responded, hands trailing to the waistband of the pants you were wearing. The thought of having sex in a hall where anyone could walk in at any point was enough to send a shiver down your spine. You weren’t one for exhibitionism normally, however you weren’t gonna turn this down.
“Fuck it.” Your words made a grin spread across Spencer’s face, his lips pressing a chaste kiss against your lips while working on getting your pants pulled off, panties following in one swift motion. Licking his hand, the older male didn’t waste any time before moving the wet hand between your legs, his spit working as lube as he wanted to make sure you were wet enough for the deed. Lord knows that he didn’t want you tearing at any point.
The feeling of his fingers brushing against your clit had already sent electricity through your body, a light gasp escaping your lips.
“Such a pretty girl, bet you haven’t ever had any man pay attention to you, huh? I can only imagine you’ve been with selfish little boys who haven’t even attempted to bring you to orgasm..” He sighed playfully, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips once more. He was addicted, drinking in your moans as his thumb was massaging your clit, one finger pushed deep in your weeping hole while he was working you open.
This was definitely something new, you didn’t really sleep around so the few times you’d engaged in casual sex were quick, rushed. You sure as hell knew that the past couple of dudes couldn’t even find your clit. You were intoxicated on his touch the small movements he made eliciting moans and gasps into his mouth. With your hips rolling against the touch, you let your eyes flutter shut.
“As much as I hate to stop, we’ve got fifteen minutes and I’m dying to be inside of you.” He murmured against your lips, his hands moving to undo his belt before tugging his pants down his legs, boxers being pulled down soon after. The sight of his hard cock had your full attention. “Ready? You’re sure you want to keep going?”
“Yes!” You rasped, making him chuckle while his large hands were spreading your thighs apart, letting a trail of his spit fall onto your pussy before he was giving himself a few tugs. The thick tip of his shaft was spreading the spit onto your cunt, a hum falling from his lips. So pretty. God, I hate having to crunch time like this.” He groaned while letting the thick head push into your hole, your mouth falling open at the delicious burn that came with the stretch of your inner walls. If only you knew about your professor’s cock sooner.. All the stress of studying for quizzes would’ve been a million times easier.
His hips snapped without warning, a loud moan falling from your mouth while the male couldn’t help but chuckle as he quickly clasped a hand over your mouth. “Shh. Can’t have anyone hearing you.” His hand barely did justice to hide your moans and cries as his hips continued to roughly thrust, the desk rocking steadily with each movement.
“Fuck. It’s like this pussy was made for me, look at the way she takes my cock and is desperate for more. So greedy.” The vulgar words from your otherwise sweet and seemingly innocent man’s mouth was strangely attractive, attractive to a level that your inner walls were spasming around the hard cock nestled deep inside of you, so far you felt like he was hitting your cervix. Then again, you could’ve just been exaggerating.
With your fingernails digging into his clothed shoulders, you could feel a knot in your stomach, tightening so tight that you felt like the floodgates were going to burst open.
“I-I’m gonn-” You stuttered, words muffled against his hand while Spencer nodded.
“I’m almost there. Cum for me.” His words were husky, tone dripping with ecstasy as he let out a low groan.
As your pussy clenched tightly around his cock, the both of you were letting out a mixture of groans, mons and even a few whimpers slipping from the older man’s lips. It was all too much, finally letting the dam break as you were letting your head fall back, mouth agape as your thighs were shaking, your creamy arousal making a ring around his cock.
There was a little whine at the emptiness you felt when his cock wasn’t inside of you, the male opting to gently move you from the desk before putting you on your knees. “Look at you. Fuck. Stick your tongue out for me. Make sure you close your eyes too. I don’t wanna give you any infections.” Even in a huffing and panting mess, he looked out for you.
Doing as you were told, you let your mouth fall open while your eyes fluttered shut, the male groaning at the sight as he roughly fisted at his cock. There was only a few pumps before his cock was twitching, it being his turn for his head to fall back as he was painting your face with his spent. The load was a lot more than you expected.
Maybe he needed this just as bad as you did.
As the act was coming to an end, Spencer was trying to catch his breath while tugging up his pants and boxers. He’d retrieved a few tissues from his desk before leaning down to wipe your face, a light hum leaving his lips. “Maybe you can talk to me about some extra notes you could add to your doodle book. Say over coffee tomorrow morning?”
“Deal.”
#criminal minds#spencer reid#criminal minds fandom#spencer reid fandom#criminal minds fic#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid smut#dr spencer reid#spencer reid one shot#doctor spencer reid#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid criminal minds#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x reader smut#strawbeerossi kinktober 2023#dr reid#criminal minds smut#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds fanfiction#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid thoughts#spencer reid au#spencer reid scenario
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teach me - Chris Sturniolo
summary: you find out you’re bestfriend chris is a total virgin, and has never touched himself, you offer to teach him everything
contains: nsfw, sub!chris, virginity loss, inexperienced!chris, handjob, fluff.
——————————————————————————
chris and i have been friends for years, i met him in middle school when we were placed in the same class.
we tell eachother most things, but a topic that never gets brought up often between us is our personal sex life, obviously he makes dirty jokes every hour of the day but that’s about it.
i sit on the couch with chris as we yap about useless topics,
suddenly he goes dead silent.
“chris?” i question, inspecting his blank face. he shakes his head before speaking,
“what.” he mutters, my eyebrows furrow from the very unexpected change in attitude.
“what happened with you?” i ask, scooting closer to him on the couch and tracing my fingers over his knuckles.
“i can tell you anything right?” he whispers, my heart rate starts to subtly pick up.
“yes- of course!” i state with a nervous laugh.
he hesitates for a moment, his hand reaching up and rubbing the back of his neck.
“i’m like, really frustrated.” he says with no other context,
“frustrated? did i say something-“ i fidget with his hand.
“no! like… sexually frustrated-“ he says barely above a whisper.
my cheeks flush, that’s the first time chris has mentioned anything sexually involving him.
“oh? when was the last time you fucked a girl.” i ask calmly, he buries his face into his palms with a small groan
“never.” he whines quietly.
“what?”
“never!” he repeats slightly louder.
“you’re a virgin?” i ask, he nods shyly.
“you’re the most- i mean i just didn’t expect that-“ i ramble, trying to make him feel better.
“i’m honestly coming up on 21 and i’ve never done anything it’s so annoying.” chris speaks up.
“i get it, just do stuff with yourself.” i sigh,
“i don’t know how to..” he groans,
“you don’t know how to do what?” i ask,
“touch myself? i don’t fucking know-“ he says.
a small laugh escapes my lips, “you are literally the most horny man i know, how have you gone a solid 20 years without touching yourself.”
“i’ve never had a need to, but these past few months have been.. different” he laughs,
“jesus chris, i understand why you’re frustrated now.” i scoff,
he nods with a grin, a silence filling the living room.
he avoids eye contact before opening his mouth, “you’re like.. the only person who knows about that.”
i nod, “thank you for telling me chris.”
“so- you genuinely don’t know how to touch yourself?” i repeat,
“i mean i know how to but i’ve never tried- i did try once but i don’t think i did it right cause it didn’t feel good.” he sighs.
“i can teach you.” i blurt out, almost cutting him off. i clasp a hand over my mouth before spinning around.
he goes quiet, almost contemplating his decision.
“would you?- teach me..?” he whispers,
“i- i mean i guess” i reply,
how the fuck is this happening.
chris’s chest rises and falls more dramatically now, he runs a hand through his long silky hair.
i stand up off the couch, grabbing his hand and tugging him up.
i pull him down the corridor into his bedroom, “god what are the chances of you, chris sturniolo, being a total virgin?” i say in disbelief, his cheeks go red with a small laugh.
i sit him down on the edge of his bed, “we’re really doing this?” he asks,
“it’ll just be- normal, just a one time thing. i mean it’s a positive thing and you’ll finally be able to do stuff with yourself!” i smile,
“o-okay you can just tell me everything i need to do.” he breathes,
“let’s start by getting these off you.” i say crouching down next to the edge of the bed and tugging his sweatpants down his legs.
“you might wanna take your shirt off, you’ll get hot.” i tell him,
he complies, discarding his shirt onto the pile of pillows at the other end of the bed.
he sits in just his boxers.
i take in a deep breath before harshly pulling my shirt off my body, exposing my completely bare chest.
i mean, i had to get him hard at some point?
a small “woah” escapes his raw lips as he shamelessly stares
“woah is crazy.” i mock him, earning a small giggle from him.
i push him further back onto the bed, his back resting against the headboard.
i sit down and straddle his thighs, looking down at him slightly.
“okay, can i take these off?” i ask, tugging at the hem of his black boxers, which have a large tent in them.
“yeah- go for it-“ he sighs with an excited grin.
i tug them down, his erection springing out and resting against his stomach.
“oh my god chris!” i state without thinking,
“is it bad?” he instantly replies with,
“no- no just big.” i whisper,
i take his length into my hand, just holding it up right.
he sighs deeply,
i almost forget i’m meant to be teaching him.
“right, so give me your hand.” i say, grabbing his hand
i spit into the palm of his hand, “oh-“ he breathes,
“sorry.” i giggle,
i grab his wrist and guide his hand to his cock.
“what i want you to do first is just rub that spit all over it f’me.” i say, looking into chris’s eyes.
he wraps his hand around his dick, before stroking it slowly up and down.
“there we go, just like that.” i nod, he watches his hand intently as it runs up and down his length.
i adjust my position on his thighs before holding the outside of his hand, and taking it off his dick.
i just hold the outside of his hand now, moving it wherever i want it.
“i only need your thumb right now.” i whisper, he nods, curling all his other fingers.
i hold his thumb and brush it over his raw tip, a small gasp escapes his mouth.
“just keep rubbing that for me.” i instruct him softly,
he nods frantically as he continues to do exactly that.
i guide his thumb into his slit, a pathetic gasp escapes his lips, “oh my god!” his voice raises a couple octaves.
“good boy, you’re doing really well.” i praise him, which he responds very well to,
i hear several loud whimpers fall from his lips, along with his hips lifting slightly off the bed.
“now give me your other hand.” i say, prying his hand away from the sheets.
i place it on the lower portion of his dick, and guide it up and down.
i squeeze his hand slightly around his dick, his mouth falling open.
“i- i need to stop its getting too much!” he protests with tears pooling in his eyes,
“no sweetheart, that just means you’re about to finish, which will feel really nice, okay?” i assure him,
“fuck-! yes-“ he squeezes out, bucking his hips up into his hands.
his eyes are squinted open slightly, still directly staring at my tits.
i take my hand off the outside of his, and reach it down to cup his balls.
that seems to tip him over the edge.
“pleasepleasepleaseplease”
he rambles, throwing his head back against the headboard before spurts of white land on his stomach and chest.
“good, so so good, keep running your hand up and down and ride it out.” i instruct him, which he does.
he slowly takes his hands away, letting them fall limp onto the sheets as he’s completely silent.
“that- that felt incredible y/n.” he pants in shock,
“how did i go 20 years without ever doing that? jesus.” he covers his flushed face with his hands.
“you did so well.” i assure him, he lets out a soft whine.
i laugh lightly, “you respond well to words like that” i say under my breath.
“mmhm.” he agrees, “that shit did something to me.”
i reach over and tug on my shirt, he lays still on the bed,
streaks of white still lay across his torso.
“oh- hold on.” i say, grabbing his shirt and starting to gently clean him up.
i tug up his boxers and sweatpants, he sighs deeply before flopping down on the bed.
“thank you- so much.” he sighs,
“do you want me to.. maybe teach you more tomorrow?” i ask boldly,
his eyes almost light up, “shit, please do.” he laughs.
—-
tags:
@downbad4reid @sturniolo04 @similartokayyz @sturnsintrouble @ilovemattsturn @raysmayhem-72 @75sturn @sturniol0s @secret-sturniolo @hfkeclnendmwodne @sturniolosass @gxldenlush @stonermattsgf @101sara @beccaluvschris @oliviasturniolo21 @imwetforyourmom @tylerstacobell @sunsetsturniolos @aliceloveschris @jayz4dayz4 @sassysturniolo2008 @nyktoxs-lover @nathandoesgf @starsturns234 @chrissturnsss s @joemamaaa42069 @sturnthepot @zayyluvz @realuvrrr @livialifesblog @sturnioloblogs @riowritesitall @raysmayhem-72 @sturnsdoll @obvisturns @stupid4sturniolo @meerkatzthings @witchofthehour @rosalierenee43 @gabrielle-brun1 @ilovemymannnnnnnn @sturnioloxlver @buckys-goodgirl @sturniol0s@ilovemymannnnnnnn @chr1sgirl4life @luanetaluenta @sturnsssbow @mattfangirl @luvr4miya @luvtay111 @lolasturniolo @freshloveforthefit @ruedowney @lovingchrissposts @333michelle @h3arts4harry @jamiesturniolo @chrisstopherfilmed @itzdarling @ @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @ev3rgreenxtrees @certifiednatelover @solarsturniolo @mattsenthusiast @yomamaslays4lyfe @peachmels @alinaa131 @pepsiluvr0209 @creamoncreamoncream2 @szobofc @mattscoquette @blahbell668 @sturniolo04 @bitchydragonparadise @sturni0l0 @ratatioulle @sturnsfav @mattsonly @justalittle47 @sunsetsturniolos
#sturniolo#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic
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Could you do Carlisle Cullen x wife fem!reader where she accompanied Bella to the hospital and someone tries to flirt with her and he saw what happened and got jealous even though they have been married for centuries🤭. Add something you'd like. Tag me later! Thanks.
Not Interested (Carlisle Cullen X Vampire!Wife!Reader)
Masterlist
Request Something
Summary: Hearing the news about Edward saving Bella from a rogue van, you rushed to the hospital. While trying to find your husband and family, you seem to attract some unwanted attention.
A/N: tweaked the first part of the request but that’s it. au where esme doesn’t exist
***
When you had gotten a call from Alice telling you that Edward had saved Chief Swan’s daughter and Rosalie had followed the ambulance they were in to the hospital, you knew you had to go over to play mediator. Rosalie was very clear about her stance on Edward’s infatuation with Bella and the danger that infatuation could put all of you in; it was becoming a constant topic of argument between the two. Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to visit your husband.
The hospital parking lot was a bit crowded when you arrived, you felt lucky when you finally found a spot. It seemed that everyone was concerned about Bella’s well-being, even though you heard that she was very adamant about being okay.
You pushed through the small crowd to get inside and went to the receptionist’s desk.
“Hello, Mary!” You said with a polite smile. Being married to the best doctor in Forks, who worked long hours, had made you acquainted with almost everyone on the staff. “Do you know if Carlisle is busy right now?”
“He’s with a patient, but I’ll page him so he knows to come down when he’s done.” She responded with a sweet tone. You thanked her and sat in the small waiting room, grabbing a magazine off the table to flip through as you waited for your husband or one of your kids to come.
From the corner of your eye, you saw someone approaching you. Thinking it was one of your children or Carlisle, you glanced up. But it was just a stranger, so you stuck your nose back in the magazine.
“Hey.” The man said, sitting in the seat next to you. You subtly shifted away from him. “I don’t think I’ve seen you around before. Are you new to town?”
You were a bit surprised that he didn’t know you or recognized you, at the very least. Even though you usually stayed at home, you were well-known around the hospital and the high school. Besides, your family was a bit of a hot topic, being so pale and mysterious and keeping to yourselves. And this was a small town where everyone knew everyone.
“Nope.” You responded, trying to be polite while also conveying that you weren’t interested in talking much. “I’ve lived here for a few years.”
“Then why haven’t I seen you around?” He leaned forward, a curious smirk on his face. You did your best to hide your grimace.
“I guess we’ve never been in the same place at the same time.”
“Well, that’s a shame. Maybe we should do something to fix that.” You wanted to roll your eyes at his forwardness. To him, you were a complete stranger sitting in a hospital. For all he knew, you could be waiting to see a family member on their deathbed, and he wants to flirt. “Do you wanna maybe go get a drink?”
“I’m fine.” You replied with indifference.
“Aw, don’t be like that. I bet I could show you a good time.”
You laughed, shutting the magazine and dropping it onto the table. You could sense someone coming down the hall, and you knew exactly who it was. And you knew he was making his steps a little heavier than usual to make his presence known.
“Believe me, I’m not interested.” By the time you were standing and looking down on the stranger, Carlisle had reached the waiting room, his gaze fixated on the two of you. You turned your head and smiled brightly. “Darling! There you are!”
You strode over to your husband and kissed him on the cheek, the faintest lip print being left on his pale cheek. You could feel the jealousy radiating off of him, but the slight snarl on his lips turned into a loving smile.
“Hello, dear.” His arm was wound firmly around your waist, the tips of his fingers skimming your hip. The hold felt possessive, like he needed to make it clear to this mystery man and anyone who passed by you that they had no chance. It was amusing to you that even after a few centuries of marriage, Carlisle still felt jealous when someone tried to win you over, even when you were blatantly uninterested.
Speaking of the stranger, Carlisle gave him a glaring glance, and he knew it was time for him to leave. When he was out the door, Carlisle softened.
“What are you doing down here?”
“Alice told me about the van.” You said, pursing your lips. “I had a bit of a feeling that Rosalie would come here to have a word or two with Edward about the whole thing.”
“You, my little angel, are very smart.” Carlisle smiled down at you before nodding towards the other side of the room, where two of your children were quietly hissing arguments to each other. “And they are right on time.”
You laughed a little before letting Carlisle walk you over to Rosalie and Edward to hear the full story, even though you had already gotten most of it from Alice. The entire time, Carlisle’s arm stayed around you, a constant reminder to everyone that you belonged to each other for eternity.
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Obsessed - Part 3 (Azriel x Reader)
Summary: Nesta is even more delusional than Y/n. Azriel finally knows his woman is attracted to him.
Warnings: smutty fantasies, delusional bestie Nesta, Azriel right after a shower, Azriel in ONLY a towel, Azriel's tattoos, delusional Azriel.
Click here for Obsessed (Masterlist)
****
Azriel had no idea what he was thinking when he let Y/n in his apartment. The same place he’d overanalysed to see where all he could fuck her.
That’s right.
He wasn’t thinking at all.
Because he opened the door, saw her, and voila~ she was inside.
She moved towards the kitchen and began hunting for plates. Azriel simply watched her as she made herself at home and owned the kitchen.
Yes.
She did.
Y/n owned the kitchen, the apartment, and she owned him.
Azriel appreciated the domesticity for a moment before walking towards her to help. He picked out a bottle of wine and the glasses.
When they finally sat down, a silence washed over. Azriel was getting the feeling that this was not a comfortable silence. “What happened?”
“I should’ve at least texted you.” So that’s why she was gloomy.
“Your classes begin tomorrow. You need to study.” He remembered that Y/n took academics seriously.
“But I kept on remembering you and I promised myself I’d text or call after finishing one topic and then I read more papers and got carried away and now, it’s been three days.” She slowly quietened and started playing with her fork.
“We’re going to dine and chat.” He deftly served the lasagna for both of them. “There’s nothing wrong here. Nothing weird or awkward. Nothing to worry about.”
Azriel watched her nod at him hesitantly. She was still worried.
“How can I convince you that everything is all right between us?” He asked, folding his arms and letting them rest on the table as he leaned forward to look at her closely.
This woman, this wonderful woman, fretting because she didn’t contact him. She didn’t need to know that he already knew what was going on. That she was so immersed in studying that she did not have any proper meals.
He also knew that she had rushed off to the supermarket earlier this evening and spent a lot of time in the kitchen.
What he didn’t know was that all of it was for him.
That information warmed him in an unexpected manner.
“Hey.” He rose and reached her. Azriel turned her chair and kneeled before her. “It’s all right.”
“It’s just, you’re so good to me and. . . I didn’t even call or text and now, you’re still. . . you’re still so good to me.”
Good?
That wouldn’t do.
He was supposed to be the best for her.
Good sounded like mediocrity in his own head but the word sounded like an achievement when she said it.
Was this what she thought about him?
“It’s all right. We’re fine. You’re here. I’m here. We’re okay.” He patted her head gently.
Azriel stood up, pulled another chair next to her, and readied a bite for her but Y/n shook her head. “I made it for you. You should eat first.”
Something in his head had just short circuited.
He had just been hit with the realisation that she had cooked for him but to hear her say it was euphoric.
“You’ll eat after I take a bite?” She nodded instantly so he took a bite.
It wasn’t made by a chef who considered cooking to be an art for the world to enjoy.
It was made by someone who wanted to cook only for him and not for the world.
A taste prepared to be enjoyed within the privacy and security of the people that would comprise his home.
“Thank you.” His voice was raw and tinged with much more emotion than he’d expected.
This moment with her, her cooking, and him was simply so overwhelming.
“You’ve done so well.” Y/n smiled brightly and a part of Azriel felt like he had truly achieved something in life. To make this woman happy and safe.
This woman, warm as a blanket in early winter mornings, beautiful in the face of her entire life—he wanted his opportunity to cherish her. And he’d take it. He could be patient.
Azriel did not ever remember doing anything good enough to deserve this woman’s presence in his life. But she was here and he’d keep her by his side.
They dined sitting next to each other. And Azriel was acutely aware of everything she did. Every time those breasts heaved as she breathed. Those lips with a bit of cheese at the corner.
He turned to his own plate, nearly scarfing down the meal lest he have another inappropriate thought. But the sight of his own fork reminded him of her mouth around her own fork.
Y/n would look lovely on her knees and even lovelier with his cock inside that mouth. He’d wrap her perfect hair around his fist and thrust inside her mouth. And then he’d-
“Azriel.” She was sitting right next to him, and the height difference was enough for him to think about leaning in.
That stupid bit of cheese was still by the corner of her lip and Azriel could nearly see how she’d look after he’d come in her mouth.
“Are you all right?”
No, he wasn’t.
He wanted that mouth.
On his lips, on his chest, on his cock.
“Yes.” A fucking lie. He was not okay knowing that the woman he was fantasising about was right next to him, eating a meal, thinking that this was just a neighbourly interaction.
Azriel definitely didn’t have any neighbourly intentions towards Y/n unless you could count wanting to fuck her against her front door as one of those.
Conversation continued as she told him about her classes, her education so far, and more things he’d already read in her report but with an addition of her own feelings towards them.
She was not eager to indulge in her private life but she was very proud to talk about Nesta, her best friend since childhood. He heard a few funny moments from her past and bits and pieces about her family.
At some point, he’d begun speaking. It was not just about being comfortable with her but also about wanting to tell her, and knowing that she would now know something about him. So he told her about his friends, his education, and a few things about his everyday life.
When it was nearly eleven, he reminded her that she had classes from tomorrow. Azriel could swear he saw disappointment in her eyes as Y/n made a move to leave.
He really wanted to kiss her. Tell her that she’d cooked really well. That he was thankful for her efforts.
And instead of escorting her to the door, he wanted to take her to the bedroom where he’d undress her and kiss every inch of her.
He couldn’t kiss her but there was something else he could do.
And that’s how Azriel found himself watching baking videos as he retired to bed instead of taking a while to masturbate to his fantasies of Y/n.
****
Y/n was in a good mood after last night’s dinner but she felt guilty for not contacting Azriel. Her neighbour was so nice, so kind. He’d helped her far more than neighbours ever did and she’d just . . . forgotten him while she studied.
She was well-prepared for her classes, met a few new people, toured the campus library, and returned to her apartment.
She immediately FaceTimed Nesta.
“Wait, let me just set this.” Nesta moved to the kitchen in her own shared apartment and placed the phone so that she could cook while they talked. Y/n had already done the same. “Now, before you spill, I have some news. Remember your ex?”
“Very difficult to forget his impact in my life.”
“Lots of trauma and insecurity, I know.” Nesta knew how condescending that creature had been to Y/n, always belittling her whenever she did something or was about to do something herself. And then he’d be a little hypocrite by saying that he’d support her choices while also routinely telling her to stop using her brain. “He got roped into a case of tax fraud and he got fired but he’s still a party to the case.”
Y/n remained silent but her wide eyes were enough for Nesta to understand that she’d been shocked. Nesta waited in front of the screen patiently. “Well. . . fuck him.”
“That’s my girl!” Nesta cheered. “Also, there’s a rumour floating among the alumni that he made some powerful enemies so he’s laying low or he’s underground or on the run or whatever terminology they use for people like that but since this guy is the worthless lowlife that hurt you, I’d prefer to say he’s in the sewer.”
“Hopefully, he’ll drown in the sewage.”
“Moving on, quite literally, to better things in life. Exhibit A: your hot neighbour. Have you fucked?”
“No. And I don’t think we will.” She had a good talk with him last night, absorbing his every word like a sponge but she couldn’t help but feel that he was not attracted to her in the way she was towards him.
“Why not? He’s hot. You’re hot. It only makes sense that you two fuck.”
Y/n looked at the screen, unimpressed. “I think he sees me as a sister.”
“Then go! Do incest! What are you waiting for?” Nesta waved her hands.
“We’re not related.”
“Then do the step-sibling incest thing. We’ve already watched My Fault. It’s bound to be hot.” Nesta deadpanned.
My Fault was a hot, forbidden romance. Now, that was another fantasy.
“Wait. Why do you think he sees you as a sister?” Nesta came to the screen and started eating an apple.
“Because he patted my head last night.” Y/n sighed. “It felt very sibling-like.” She began peeling the onions.
“What happened last night?” Nesta was now curious.
“I forgot to contact him for three days so I made lasagna as an apology.”
“Wait a fucking second.” Here we go. “You have that hot furnace as your neighbour and you forgot him?” Nesta sounded very much offended on Azriel’s behalf. “Are you drugged or something?” She opened a container and closed it. She kept it back and took out another container.
“We enjoyed dinner and dessert and conversations but I almost cried before we started.”
“Darling, men have to be dealt with very tactfully.” Nesta placed a bowl in front of her phone and began peeling potatoes. “If they see your emotional baggage, it’ll only be a big turn-off even when you only want a fling. For example, in my gym, there’s a trainor-”
“You joined a gym?” Y/n interrupted. “Why am I hearing about this now?”
“I have too much free time now that you’re not here so I joined a gym.” Nesta glared at Y/n and the latter kept quiet. “There’s a hot trainor and I know he wants to fuck me. But what am I doing? I’m doing what every reasonable, prudent woman would do. I’m ignoring him.”
“That’s probably not how you get laid.”
“I’m not trying to get laid. I’m trying to get railed. Understand the difference.” Nesta pointed her knife at the screen.
“Laid is a romantic thing. Laid is when you lose your virginity. Laid is for sweet love making.” Nesta sounded a little disgusted while explaining ‘laid’ before her tone changed and she began her passionate explanation about what ‘railed’ meant.
“Railed is for fucking against any surface because you can’t wait. It’s for throwing away your clothes and letting all the lust take over. Touching is for laid, groping is for railed. Do you understand?” Nesta waved her knife and Y/m dutifully nodded.
“Maintain enough distance to let the sexual tension brew like a stew. But not too much distance to make him uninterested. And then soon, Cassian will fuck me like his life depends on it.” Nesta sounded gleeful as she revealed her plan.
Y/n knew that Nesta was only going to fuck this trainor because she never did serious relationships. Y/n had been in one serious relationship which blew up on her face. And since then, it was unbearable to think of going for romance. “Cassian is your trainor’s name?”
“Nice name to moan, don’t you think?”
“Does he know you think that?” She began cutting the onions. Y/n thought that name sounded familiar.
“Absolutely not. It’s only been two days. I’ll take some time. He’s already looking when I’m stretching and so now, I’ll do some specific warm ups that’ll make him realise that I’m a very, very flexible woman.”
“You bitch.” Y/n laughed as she stirred the vegetables.
“I’m going to make him beg.” Nesta grinned evilly. “Enough about him. How do we get you to commit incest?”
“Did I tell you he’s older?”
“How old?”
“He’ll turn twenty nine in a few days.”
“You just turned twenty four. Oh, he’ll love it when you call him daddy.” Nesta smirked.
“I think I want to call him sir.” Y/n laughed.
“Wait. That’s a good idea.”
“What?”
“Grocery shopping. All right? Show some cleavage. Stand next to him. Look up at him with the most innocent look. Okay? So innocent and holy that he should think you’re on the list of innocent people right after Jesus. And then say, ‘yes, sir’. Imagine the sex. He won’t even wait to take you to the bedroom.”
“I’m not really sure.” Y/n was hesitant. What if she ruined whatever friendship she had with him?
The doorbell rang once. “Wait a sec. Nes, I’ll be back in a minute.”
Y/n washed her hands quickly, wiped them on a towel, and went to answer the door.
Azriel stood there, looking mindnumbingly sexy in a shirt with the first couple of buttons not. . . his chest. . . tattoos and. . . Y/n took a step back and nearly fell.
Azriel’s arm snaked around her waist as he easily caught her and helped her stand up.
“I received your parcel by mistake.” He whispered near her ear.
“Thank you.” She probably squeaked. His hand was still on her waist and her eyes were shut tightly.
“Y/n?” His voice was too deep, too dark, too bedroom-like. “Why are you hot?”
“What?” Her voice was a mere whisper.
“Open your eyes, Y/n.” Why was this man saying her name so much? “You feel feverish.” At some point, the back of his hand was pressed against her forehead.
“I’m not. I’m fine.” She hurriedly explained. “Thank you for the parcel.”
Azriel smiled beautifully at her. “I’ll see you around.”
His hands left her waist and he reached his own door. Y/n watched as he entered his apartment, waved at her before closing the door.
She closed her own door and ran to the kitchen to tell Nesta all about it.
****
When Y/n had been exploring during her first day of classes, Azriel easily infiltrated her house (he had a spare key, what do you think he bought the building for?) and set a few bugs to help him eavesdrop.
Was it a coincidence that he made his appearance while Y/n was on a video call with her best friend, discussing and debating about fucking him?
Absolutely not.
He knew that Y/n didn’t like wearing her airpods unless it was necessary so her video calls were always on speaker phone. He’d heard every bit of what both women said.
The only thing that was a coincidence was that he was just about to ring the doorbell when the delivery man had appeared. He signed her parcel, claiming to be her boyfriend (which he would be) and when the delivery boy had left, he finally proceeded.
Now that he knew for a fact that she was sexually attracted to him, he had to only seduce her. To coax her desires before revealing that he was always ready to fuck her.
As for how he’d marry her, that was a little further away but he was confident now.
If she ever called him sir, he knew he’d crack and explode. Y/n wouldn’t even have to do much and he’d fuck her ever so thoroughly.
So he waited.
He got his work done. A few meetings. Calls. Learned how to bake.
He did get his chance to talk to her or go grocery shopping with her but she did not call him sir.
The electricity was beginning to crackle between them when he spotted her looking at his forearms often. He’d wear henleys, roll up his sleeves, and watch as she drooled over while pretending he didn’t realise.
How adorable was she as she checked him out not so discreetly.
And how adorable would she be, begging and crying for him to stop.
****
Azriel had finally perfected baking a cheesecake and it was kept for cooling. A few more hours and he could bring it over to Y/n.
The doorbell rang and Azriel cursed. If there was someone other than Y/n on the other side, he’d throw them down the stairs.
This was a bit inconvenient since he’d just finished showering. He draped a towel around his hips and took another one to begin with his hair as he headed for the door.
It seemed that there would be no deaths since Y/n was waiting for him. But the moment she saw him, her eyes widened and she looked like she’d seen a ghost.
Why?
She looked damn good in that grey sweater and black jeans. Winter fashion suited Y/n. Sweaters were gentle on her curves, her legs were. . .
Yes.
Those were the legs he wanted around his waist. Minus the jeans, of course.
She looked so fucking good but there was only one problem when she went out with him.
He couldn’t show her off as his wife.
As stated in the previous chapter, a lot of things would be sorted if he married Y/n.
Azriel was ready to brood now that the reality of not being married to her slapped him.
But then why was she so shocked when she was the one who looked like she was out to seduce him by existing?
Oh.
He was in a towel.
And with his chest on display.
He remembered that tattoos were an attraction for women and he had loads of them. On his fingers, hands, arms and chest.
Was she attracted?
“Y/n?” He let the towel for his hair hang around his neck.
“Huh?” She then looked at his face because she’d been staring at his chest for so long.
How cute.
She was attracted.
Did she know that all this was hers?
This chest. These hands. These legs. And this cock.
Everything was hers.
Honestly speaking, he’d fuck her if she asked.
“Come in.” He opened the door wider.
“You have tattoos.” She still seemed to be in a daze.
He really had to put in effort to not smirk at her flustered state.
Would she like the tattoos under the towel?
“Yes, I have tattoos. Come inside, Y/n.” He gently ushered her in before realising that he just brought in his woman inside the apartment. His woman who was definitely attracted to him and even more so, more that she’d seen him half naked.
“Yeah. Um. . I was going to buy vegetables. Just wanted to see if you’d like to come with me or if you wanted me to get something.” She was looking at the wall now.
What was this woman even thinking?
That he’d ever refuse her?
Hah! What nonsense.
Why was he even here in this country, in this apartment, if not for her?
Azriel walked over, tilted her chin with a hand, and met her gaze looking as oblivious as he could. “Is there a reason why you’re not looking at me?”
Fuck it. He wanted her to look at her. What did he even look this good for if she was not looking at him?
“I thought. . Maybe you’d be uncomfortable if I looked at you. Some people don’t. . they don’t like that and I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable because of me.”
“You have my permission to look.” To touch. To kiss. To suck. To fuck. She had all permissions since day one.
“Vegetables?” She averted her gaze.
Azriel restrained the urge to smirk.
“Give me ten minutes.” He returned to his room, dried himself, dressed up, and returned to Y/n.
“Ready?” He asked as he wrote his watch.
“You haven’t dried your hair.”
“I used the towel.”
“It’s evening, Az. You’ll catch a cold. Where’s your hair dryer?” There it was. There was the confident Y/n.
“Don’t have one.” He lied so easily. He wanted to see what she’d do.
She marched over to the door and opened it. “Well. Come on. Lock up. You’re using my hair dryer. Only then will you come with me.”
“Yes, ma’am.” He grinned. Azriel loved it when she bossed him around. This side of her rarely revealed itself.
Y/n froze and then turned away to unlock her door. And Azriel did as he’d been told.
****
Has anyone seen Azriel half naked? Ever?
In a towel? Bare chested?
Droplets on that golden skin?
Tattoos? Fucking tattoos?
Wet hair?
The wet dream?
How in fuck had she not fainted?
And why did she think she was being sensible by inviting him to her apartment?
To dry his hair?
Well, he did need his hair to be dried to avoid a cold.
She could keep telling herself that.
And what the fuck was that chin raising movement he did?
In that instant, she could think of nothing but his she wanted to be laid down on the wooden coffee table and fucked like they were all that mattered.
A towel.
A towel.
A towel with a tattoo that it partially concealed.
He had a tattoo there.
She wanted to see that tattoo.
And his cock.
She wanted to kneel before him.
Did anybody in the entire godsfucking universe bothered to take pity on her sanity and tell her that this man was not just sexy but fictional sexy?
No.
Her sanity had evaporated at some point.
Because her knees were already weakening as soon as she laid eyes on him.
And he’d raised her chin looking like a sex god from a dark romance novel.
Y/n needed to kneel and bend and spread for him all at once.
Y/n: Save me.
Nesta: What happened?
Y/n: I saw him shirtless. In a towel. Only a towel. My sanity is deceased. And I’m so fucking horny.
Nesta: Send pics ;)
Y/n: He has tattoos all over. I saw one of them which was partially covered by that towel. It’s down there.
Nesta: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Y/n: He has a back.
Nesta: Everyone has a back.
Y/n: Wide shouldered, golden, tattooed back, with droplets.
Nesta: Oh. Ohhhhhh. Ohhooohhoooooooo. You lucky bitch, you’re going to get railed. Scratch that back. Mark him well.
Y/n pocketed her phone before she got too delusional and brought the hairdryer. Azriel was sitting on her bed as instructed. She connected the appliance to the plug and gave it to him.
He looked at her coyly with a stupid smirk before she sighed. “Fine.”
Y/n switched on the dryer and dried his hair. She combed through with her fingers and Azriel looked more than happy to simply sit there.
“You should do this if you’re going to wash your hair after lunchtime.” She wanted to sound stern but Y/n was busy thinking about grabbing his hair in other situations.
“Uh huh.” He grinned at her like a cat. Y/n set the dryer down and fluffed down his hair herself.
“All done.”
He stood up and checked himself in the mirror. “Thank you, sweetheart. Now shall we get some vegetables?”
Y/n would have a heart attack at any time soon. She quickly texted Nesta, followed after him, locked the door and they left for shopping.
Instead of heading towards the sidewalk, Azriel headed towards the line of cars parked on the side of the road.
“Where are you going?” Y/n followed. She did not like how this man with his height and long legs just took two steps while she had to take four. She’d never really noticed before since he adjusted his pace to walk by her side.
“My car is here. I had it sent over.” He then looked at her just before he opened the door to the driver’s seat. “Do you drive?”
“Yes?”
“Do you want to drive?”
“It’s your car. I’m sure you don’t want a scratch.”
“I trust you.” He walked over and handed the keys to her. “You have a valid licence, right?”
“Azriel, you have to ask about the licence before you give someone your car keys.”
“But you said you drive.” This man had the audacity to look like a scolded child when, not more than twenty minutes ago, he looked like he could throw her around and fuck her all day, every day.
At this point, Y/n needed an exorcism to help with her uncontrollable number of fantasies.
The car was also huge enough to be fucked against. And she could bend over against the bonnet while he took her from behind but it was too cold at night for pants to be removed.
“Y/n?” Azriel appeared in front of her like his existence hadn’t resulted in an unexpected number of filthy delusions that made her panic in his presence. “Ready to leave?”
“All right.”
And they entered the car. When they were settled and she started, Azriel began. “And if you want to go somewhere far just for the quiet, we can go now that we have a car.”
“You love this car, don’t you?”
And Azriel went on a rant about how he’d purchased this one because of all that he fell in love with in this particular model. By the time he finished, they were already parked near the supermarket.
Y/n removed her seatbelt and tapped his arm. “We’ve reached.” She smiled at him.
It was nice and fluffy to simply go on a drive and listen to him.
****
It was so nice to just sit in the car. Azriel loved driving but he recently discovered he also loved sitting. And now that he was following Y/n with the shopping trolley, he felt even better.
And all Azriel wanted to do was to embrace her from behind, kiss her cheek, and laugh with her at something stupid.
It was simple and pleasant. To follow her with a trolley, to watch her frown at two containers of mayonnaise, to listen to her complain about how they should have separate section for panty liners and pads instead of putting them with baby diapers.
She was a bossy woman, a side that revealed itself when they went grocery shopping.
Gods, he wanted her to order him. To ride him and take charge.
His grip on the trolley tightened.
And just when he was beginning to control his thoughts, he saw the fire exit. The washrooms were built there. Nobody would see but he could simply hoist her away and fuck her there.
The thrill of being in a public place did something else to him.
He looked at Y/n and saw her waving at him with a container of something in her hand. He walked over to her and gave his suggestion on the chocolate spread.
The only thing he hated in this routine of grocery shopping was when it ended and they went their separate ways. She’d go to her apartment and he’d go to his. And he hated that. He hated returning to a place where she wasn’t.
And for the first time, Azriel was not alone. He was lonely in the silence.
****
Y/n knew she’d begun caring for her neighbour despite her attraction to him. That she’d started getting used to his presence in her life.
It was only supposed to be sexual attraction but as hot as he was, he was also good to her. He cared for her and his every action proved it.
She liked him.
She liked him.
Oh god.
She actually liked Azriel.
Which sane woman wouldn’t?
She didn’t care about other women. Other women could go drown in the sewer.
What about her?
This man was only supposed to be a one-time encounter from that club they went to for Feyre’s birthday party.
And then he was at the airport.
In the flight. In the same building.
And now he was a part of her life.
And during that dinner when she'd brought him lasagna, when he asked her that question so seriously. “How can I convince you that everything is all right between us?”
Y/n had melted.
She looked at the apartment. This was just for a semester but Y/n loved this space solely because Azriel was next door.
And at some point, she’d begun wishing he was here.
She called Nesta and when her friend picked up the phone, she began crying. “I like him.”
****
Taglist:
@fantanbietsson @angstylittleb1tch @fhgsvbnh @olive-main @cherryjain17 @halo-mystic @starofanotherworld @latinxbipride @viatorem-maris @acotarbestie @sevikas-whore @anthonys-viscountess @randomgurl2326 @thelov3lybookworm @cat-or-kitten
#acotar#azriel x oc#azriel x original character#a court of thorns and roses#azriel shadowsinger#a court of silver flames#acomaf#acofas#acosf#acowar#azriel imagine#azriel acotar#azriel x reader#azriel#acotar fandom#azriel smut#azriel fluff#azriel fanfic#azriel x you#acotar series#acotar smut#smut#azriel spymaster#nesta archeron#cassian#nessian#feyre archeron#acotar x reader#acotar fanfiction
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Feel free to reject this request since it’s kinda heavy, but maybe Hugh kissing the reader’s sh scars but it’s like friends to lovers? Preferably f reader but gen is fine too
YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL ❀˖°
in which logan draws stars around your scars
warnings: HEAVY MENTIONS OF SH⚠️⚠️ DO NOT READ IF THIS IS A TOPIC YOU CANNOT HANDLE, angst, blood
i actually love this request as someone who struggles w sh themselves so pls don’t be afraid to ask smt like this!
i also switched it to logan instead of hugh bc i feel like he just fits the part better and this isn’t friends to lovers it’s just lovers😭 sorry
“you drew stars around my scars. but now im bleeding.”
you couldn’t help it, the burning sensation of the blood dripping down over your old scars was a feeling you couldn’t resist.
for 2 years now you’ve told yourself that you’d stop, thay you’d get better. especially since logan came around and made you want to get better. but you couldn’t, no matter how hard you tried.
more sooner than later did the tears of guilt and regret begin pooling your eyes, the hot liquid dripping down your face as you held the cold towel to your wrist harder.
you knew logan would be up here any minute; his class was coming to an end soon. the last thing you needed was him walking in on you cutting yourself after you told him you’d stop.
you took a deep breath, drying your wrist and slapping a few bandaids on it before looking at yourself in the mirror; you were a mess. your face was flushed, covered in streaks of dried tears as the new ones kept coming. your hair was a ruffled mess, you were drowning in your hoodie and fuck did your wrist burn.
“y/n/n?” you heard from afar, shit. surely logan was in your bedroom, waiting for you to come out of the bathroom.
you sighed, praying that your voice would be strong. “i’m in here, just a minute!” you called out, cursing yourself for your voice cracking at the last second.
immediately logan’s concern grew higher, slowly approaching the door and leaning his head against it. your nervous sobs were hard to miss, especially from right against the door.
“y/n,” logan called firmly, “open the door f’me please.”
your eyes widened, noticing how logan’s voice grew louder. it didn’t take you long to pick up on how close logan was to you.
“i can’t,” your voice cracked, you looked down at your hands that shook rapidly, afraid of what was to come.
logan’s brows furrowed, he’d had enough. you heard one of his claws retract as he picked the lock.
quickly, you took out your box, shoving your blade into it and throwing it god knows where into the drawer just before logan barged in.
“are you okay in here?” he asked, glancing down at your exposed wrist, covered in bandaids.
you followed his eyes, yours widening when you noticed you forgot to roll down your sleeve.
logan felt like he could physically feel the pit growing in his stomach, realizing what you had done. logan had never understood why you chose to hurt yourself like this. but he did understand what it was like to endure so much pressure and emotion that you don’t know how to contain it. and so he never screamed, or yelled, or frankly even asked ‘why?,’ because not everyone has a ‘why.’
your tears were flowing once more as you moved closer to logan, “i’m sorry,” you sobbed, burying yourself in his arms.
he immediately welcomed you, wrapping his strong
arms around your shoulders, rocking you back and forth in hopes to calm you down.
he looks down at you, his own eyes glossed over slightly, he hates seeing you like this, especially when he knows he can’t do anything about it.
soon logan loosens his grip, reaching gently for your left wrist and bringing it up to his lips, planting a soft and gentle kiss on one of your old scars.
“my baby,” he mutters, kissing another one while ensuring he leaves your fresh one alone, “my sweet baby.”
you can do nothing but sob harder. you’d expected numerous reactions out of logan but this definitely wasn’t one of them.
“i love you,” kiss. “i’ll always love you, doll.” kiss. “y’know that? i’ll never stop loving you.” kiss.
your eyes dart down as you feel a drop of water on your wrist as logan continues kissing up and down your arm.
he was crying.
his confidence wavers, “you’re beautiful,” kiss. “so, so beautiful,” his voice begins to crack as he leans a head down on your shoulder.
logan takes a deep breath before dropping your wrists and instead taking your face in his hands, forcing you to look him in the eyes. “you’re always gonna be beautiful t’me, alright? the most beautiful girl i’ve ever seen.”
it was the first time you’d ever seen logan cry this hard, the hot tears pouring down his face at an unbelievable pace. you’d be a monster to say this didn’t make you tear up in the slightest.
you place your hands on his wrists, his hands still holding onto your face. slowly he leans in, closing the space between you two. kissing you in such a gentle, loving way that it makes your legs feel weak.
“i love you, logan.”
“you’re beautiful, peach.”
this is so sad☹️
taglist!!
@velvrei @spazwayy @oatmilkriver @sseleniaa @mei-simp @wittyjasontodd @wolverinesangel @realsimpbitchshit @pickuptruck01 @keigohawks @thereallchristine @zeeader @pink-jello-fish @twinky-wink @malfoys-demigod @seamlessepiphany @withafoll @lulawantmula @gigachadcowboy
#hugh jackman#hugh jackman x reader#logan howlett#logan howlett oneshot#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine#wolverine fic#wolverine x reader#x men#mcu edit#x men logan#marvel cinematic universe#x men wolverine#marvel#deadpool & wolverine#deadpooledit#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool 3#deadpool#poolverine#logan howlett angst#logan howlett x reader fluff#logan howlett fluff#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett smut
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supervisor was met. god help our souls
#I think everything is fine and this is mostly residual anxiety#but also. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#I now have a project area that I can start properly planning out which is good#and I have a vague schedule for the next month which helps a lot#next two weeks have just become very busy bc I have the majority of the writing for my proposal to do#I’m struggling most at this minute I think with why this actually matters#bc looking like my project will be abt spatial structure within populations which like cool interesting#but I do have to talk abt why anyone should care abt this#it is kinda frustrating to me actually bc I wanted to do smth with more immediate relevance now but the area I’ve ended up with#was 1. result of me dropping the topic I actually wanted to do 2. mentioning one of the first things I could figure out smth coherent for#3. supervisor latching onto that from my email and now we’re running with it#so okay like this immediate thing I’m doing won’t have any kind of application bc this is a study system so that’s not the issue#need to think wider abt what you learn from this and generalisability#has relevance to range shifts bc of climate change and from there is important to small scale evolutionary processes#whether you get differentiation or stratification within populations#potentially more relevant to island evolution and like. gene pool stuff?#I think I’m struggling rn bc I’ve not figured out my hypotheses yet and I can test things in a way that will be useful for other things#and there IS still utility in understanding things better come on I was willing to die on the pure science hill for so long#hdhdhsjdhnshdbsb I think I’m slightly frustrated by my supervisor just not thinking very much abt stuff#like he didn’t know the schedule for the proposal deadlines and I don’t think he knows the format tbh#I also had to tell him the focus was on the one year and not the extension bc. dude this is a masters I only have a year what#I know he’s done these before and it wasn’t exactly a surprise that this was coming so I’m kinda confused and a little annoyed#but okay it’s fine it’s fine. I can email him abt importance. and I’ll be asking abt titles around Wednesday once Ive figured out some ideas#rn i need to think about what I would be testing here with what I have available and how I would do it and I can write an overview from that#figure out what are the important questions to ask and I can find stuff that would be relevant to like conservation and shit#bc I KNOW that there’s important stuff here that I’m just not seeing. I might have to link stuff to fitness to get a more rounded analysis#which is also fine I can do that that’s probably a good way to tie the project together honestly. will make that one of the main aims#I think the studies on that are kinda lacking anyway and haven’t been done in a while so would still be filling a gap and if not#I can use THOSE studies for relevance of the project. that’s what im missing i think it’s the next step so I can understand consequences#luke.txt
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Twelve Days
After her fiance broke up their engagement Y/N has been isolating for months, but now it's the holidays and she must show up to spend it with her family. Fearful that her failure of a love life would be the main topic of discussion, she's prepared to have the worst time. That is until her brother in law, Harry, reveals an even bigger problem than her own.
Warnings: infidelity, break ups, mentions of depression and anxiety and their symptoms, mentions of alcohol and drugs, description of masturbation (male), voyeurism, implied inappropriate relationship
WC: 11.5K
Day One:
“You can do hard things.” You whispered to yourself as you drove down the street as you looked out for your parents’s car in a driveway.
You hadn’t spent the holidays with your family for the past three years. You just had a lot of things going on and lived across the country for the first year away. And then traveled the following year with your significant other and then this last year you’d spent the holidays with them and their family since you’d gotten engaged to them.
However, earlier in the year after nearly a year engaged, your fiancé backed out of the engagement and ended things with you. It had been the greatest humiliation and heartbreak of your life! After breaking the new to your parents over the phone followed by a “so I’m gonna need some space”, you’d successfully avoided every one from your family for the last several months, until now. You were mostly nervous to see your aunt and older sister. They were the most judgmental out of everyone and you hadn’t been in a place to hear their negativity. But now you were gonna be stuck with them all for twelve days.
Twelve days in Palm Springs and you were sure that you weren’t going to enjoy at least 70% of it with their probing and commentary on what you did wrong or should have done. Your dad was great about placating his younger sister, but not so much your own sister. She was definitely the golden child out of you both, so your parents were never all that hard on her, nor did they challenge her too much. You believed that she never meant to be malicious towards you but sometimes you did question if she just liked to feel like she was better than you. This particular situation made you feel a bit uneasy because it felt like an opportunity for her to rub your nose in it because she was happily married to one of the best guys you’d ever met and they had a perfect life together. She honestly did not to do anything more to remind you that she in fact was far better off than you were in this particular area of your life.
“Fuck me…” you muttered as you saw your mom, aunt, and sister unloading grocery bags from the car parked in the wide open garage of the house. You saw your sister point as the older women turned in your direction and smiled. You smiled as well and waved briefly before focusing on parking your car in the final space, beside your mom’s. You exhaled and then stepped out, already feeling that sinking feeling in your stomach growing with each step you took towards them. You could already hear their excited greetings to you.
“Hey.” You chuckled as your mother enveloped you in a big hug and squeezed.
“Te extrañe, hijita.” She hummed lowly. You felt warm inside for a few seconds. It gave you sense of comfort knowing that she had missed you.
“Yo también.” You mumbled but ended the hug quickly because after what had happened to you, you truly needed a hug form your mom and it was going to make you cry.
“Hi mija! How are you holding up?” Your aunt, Claudia, asked as she hugged you next and you semi-smiled.
“I’m good. Thanks.”
“Are you sure?” She pressed as she pulled back and looked in your eyes in concern and you nodded quickly.
“Okay. You know, whatever you need-”
“Yeah, thanks.” You nodded with a smile as she moved aside to let you greet your sister.
“Hey.” You smiled as she opened her arms and you hugged. You weren’t all that affectionate with each other so feeling her squeeze you closer felt a little unfamiliar but you just let it go on until she pulled back and placed her hands on your shoulders.
“You look good.” She complimented you. “That’s good. Show that loser what he walked out on.” She said with a smirk and you just nodded.
You felt your irritation towards her prick up your body. You hated that she attributed you looking after yourself to some revenge plot towards your ex. You had always been the kind of person to keep up with your appearance. You definitely kept things on the lighter more natural side for day to day, but you always had some makeup on. You dressed well and with thought behind your look. And you did all these things because it just made you feel good about yourself, it gave you that added little confidence boost that we all need. It was something that mattered to you and you didn’t do so for the male gaze. You felt like that was a slight dig, but you knew that she hadn’t meant it as such. You were quite sensitive though, so you always checked yourself before committing to the feeling that she wanted to piss you off.
“Can I help you guys with the groceries?” You offered.
“You need to unpack.” Your mom reminded you and you smiled.
“Right.” You said and they continued with their task while you turned to your car. You lifted the trunk open and pulled out your shoes duffle and then reached for the handle of your large rolling suitcase. You tugged hard and then felt some resistance. “Shit.” You cursed to your self when you saw that it had gotten caught on something from the top of the trunk. You had filled that baby to brim and admittedly it was resting on a decently high bed of garbage bags filled with clothes that you’d been meaning to drop off at a thrift store near your work for a couple months now.
“Need a hand?” You heard and jumped in fear as your brother-in-law’s voice coming from behind you shocked you.
“Fuck, Harry! You scared me!” You laughed, despite your creased features.
“I’m so sorry.” He chuckled. Your lips started turning up as you took in his toothy grin and crinkled eyes.
“It’s fine. I think it got caught on something. I’ve got so much shit in there.” You explained and he went over to you as you moved aside to let him inspect the issue. Moments later he was pulling your suitcase out of the trunk successfully.
“You’re gonna need a new one. It tore the fabric beside the zipper.” He notified you and you huffed.
“Of course it did…”
“I saw a roll of duct tape when I was snooping through the drawers in the pool house.” He shared, “We can put a little patch of it over the torn bit so that you can give’er, her final trip before you toss her out.” He suggested unironically and you smirked.
“How do you know it’s a her?” You asked and he smiled.
“I heard you refer to her as Jenna Rink once.”
“What? When?! Like 4 years ago? Because I haven’t seen you in ages…” You laughed.
“Yeah, actually.” He said pensively, his brows creasing deep for a few seconds as he thought about it and then he smiled. "It was when we were helping you pack for Connecticut.” He recalled and you smiled.
“Wow…great memory.” You complimented and he shrugged.
“Guess so!”
“I just have these two if you need help bringing anything else in.” You said as you closed your trunk and watched him reach into the trunk of your mom’s BMW X4. It was her current pride and joy and had been her and your dad’s 36th anniversary splurge.
“No, it’s just three more bags.” He assure you, “Just close it for me?”
“Yeah, go on.” You assured him and reached up to close the trunk before following behind him, you could hear the commotion inside as you approached the garage door. And when you walked in you were overpowered by the delicious scent of some sort of breakfast sweet treat and bacon.
“Look how sweet these men are! They made us brunch!” Your sister, Julie, exclaimed as you walked in.
“Wow!” You smiled as you saw your dad checking on the French toast cooking on a griddle.
“Y/N!” He exclaimed happily and left his task to hug you tight. He kissed your cheek and you chuckled as he told you that he missed you and was so happy to see you.
“Thanks, dad.” You hummed.
“Need help?” He asked you.
“I got it.” You assured, “Just need to know where to go.” You smiled.
“Harry, give Y/N the tour so we can set everything up!” Your sister cut in.
“Okay, just watch the bacon f’me.” He request as he set the grocery bags down. He then turned to you and grabbed the side of the suitcase handle, “I’ve got this.” He assured you.
“Thanks.” You smiled and he nodded before guiding you towards the living room.
“Let me show you what’s available.” He glanced back and you nodded. You went towards the main entrance and then turned right at the corner of the wall.
“There’s one down here. It’s the door on your left.” He said nodding towards the end of the short hallway and you slipped past him to get a look at the bedroom.
“Why didn’t it get claimed?” You asked Harry.
“Because your parents’ bathroom is on the other side of that wall.” He said and you huffed.
Your father was a notorious YouTube addict. He loved to watch videos about the news and world events but at full volume at all times, it was annoying to say the least.
“Your aunt chose the corner room.” He said and you nodded.
“I take it you and Julie took the pool house?”
“Yep.” He said and you huffed.
“The bedroom furthest from ours is free too.”
“And why is that one free?”
“Because of the potential for noise, it’s behind the kitchen and shares a wall with the laundry room.”
“God, was it designed as a servant’s quarter?” You scoffed and he chuckled, “What are the other options?”
“Then there’s the room beside it, but it’s a jack-and-jill bathroom with the servant’s quarter room, so there’s no counter space.” He explained and you groaned. “And then the room at the very end has a queen bed and it’s own bathroom-”
“But?” You asked.
“It’s only like 10 feet from the pool house.” He said.
“Oh…” you groaned, “Just keep the sex volume to a minimum, please.” You said with a grimace and he chuckled and rolled his eyes.
“Right…” He said sarcastically and you shrugged.
“Just have to put it out there.”
“Don’t worry, you won’t have to witness any of that.” He emphasized.
“Perfect.” You hummed. He proceeded to guide you back through the kitchen where your family was urging you to hurry so that you could all eat. “I’ve got the door.” You said as you slipped past him and hurried to the end of the narrow hall.
“Thanks.” He said as he wheeled your suitcase into the bedroom. The natural light was lovely. You looked around while you dropped your duffle bag of shoes onto the ground.
“Oh yeah, you’ve got a tiny patio.” He said optimistically.
“Well that’ll come in handy!” You chirped.
“Why’s that?” He asked as he left your suitcase right beside the closet door.
“I smoke a bit before I eat and before bed if I need it.” You explained, “After…everything I’ve been a bit down and it’s impacted my sleep and appetite.” You explained as you started out the small sliding glass door that would lead out to the small patio.
“Sounds like depression…” he said and you sighed.
“Yeah…I see a therapist, don’t worry.” You assured him.
“Yeah?” He asked and you turned and nodded when you saw him waiting expectantly for your answer. “Is it helping?”
“Yeah, I think so. I mean, I’m not as bad as I was like a month ago. S’why I decided to come but now I’m just nervous about what they’re gonna tell me about it.” You admitted to him and he hummed in understanding.
Harry had always been extremely easy to talk to. You didn’t talk regularly but would randomly send memes, recipes, OOTD’s, and little check-in’s every now and again. You’d say that you had a good relationship with him as his sister-in-law. You got along, you had good boundaries, and most importantly, you both wanted what was best for Julie.
“Well if it helps, your mum reminded everyone to not bring it up over dinner when we got here.”
“Lovely…” you chuckled and he smiled. “And how are you doing?” You asked as you sat on the mattress.
“Well-”
“Harry! Y/N! Hurry up, we’re hungry!” Your sister shouted from the kitchen.
“Rain check.” You said and he nodded once, “Let me wash my hands and I’ll be right out.” You said and he nodded again before heading out of the bedroom.
Thankfully, brunch was going alright. No one had brought up your failed engagement yet, Julie was just talking a lot about an important work project she’d been assigned to for the last several months. She seemed a little flustered as she spoke about the project and Harry seemed a bit annoyed with this topic of conversation. Julie’s work had caused some issues between them in the past when they were dating. She was an overachiever and tended to overcommit herself, leading to her neglecting several other areas of her life. This had likely happened again and if Harry was upset about it, then it was probably pretty bad because it took a lot for him to be upset to the point that he’d externalize it. Other than that little bit of tension, everything had gone well and you were now digging through your suitcase for the bathing suit you were certain you had packed. After giving up on trying to keep everything folded, you just dumped the contents out onto the bed and huffed when you realized that you had not actually packed the swimming suit.
“Julie, do you have a bathing suit I can borrow? I forgot to pack mine!” You called from the door to the back yard.
“Yeah, but don’t grab my bikinis! Grab the other one.” She instructed.
“Is it ugly?” You asked.
“No, but it’s my least favorite of the two.” She said with a slightly apologetic smile from the jacuzzi.
“Okay.” You assured her.
“It should be in the top left drawer.” She called to you and you nodded, “Just go in through the main door, not the sliding doors. I think Harry’s napping!” She informed you and you gave her a thumbs up as you made your way out into the backyard and to the pool house. You quietly opened up the door and slipped inside, you heard the shower running and immediately felt a little embarrassed for intruding but then you heard something else… A gravelly grunt in a consistently rhythmic interval. You had to get out now! But then you heard him speak.
“Fuck, baby… you’re so fucking good.” You heard him mutter and then thought that maybe he’d snuck some bitch in! With rage building in your body, your swiftly but quietly made your way over to the bathroom door that was only half closed and you peeked in only to see Harry alone in the shower. He was facing the shower head so that thankfully saved you the embarrassment of seeing all of him.
You felt relief upon confirming that he was alone but then the realization set in that he was getting himself off. You knew it was wrong to stay but still allowed yourself one more moment to ogle him. Your eyes raked across the broad expanse of his shoulders and then moved on to admire his gorgeous back. He had muscle outlines in places you’d never seen on another person before and his ass was tight and perky. As your gaze traveled down, you honed in on his thick thighs and it made you bite your lower lip. You briefly thought about how it might feel to sit on his lap. And then you felt your stomach sink as you realized that you were doing something really fucked up right now. The feeling sobered up your lust-hazed mind and you blinked away the imagine of his dripping wet, naked body from your memory.
“Fuuuck…Fuck!” he groaned and your heart stopped as your eyes flew back over to his frame. You could see his right arm moved back and forth with the pace of his pumping fist over his cock and seconds later he was gasping for air as he came undone.
You took a few steps back, still in complete disbelief at what you had just witnessed. You could feel your walls pulsing steadily with arousal. You needed to get what you needed and get out! You dashed to the dresser and pulled open the drawer your sister instructed and saw her two weeks worth of underwear and work-out clothes in there. Just then you heard the shower shut off. Your heart started pounding hard as you started digging through the drawer frantically and you hadn’t found anything! Then the door creaked open. You pulled open the next drawer down and saw an array of tops and pants and you groaned quietly and slammed it closed in frustration.
“Jules?” You heard Harry’s voice call out and you felt your entire world start to crumble. You were trying to speak up but no words were able to come out of your mouth. You started to back away but right before you made it around the corner to the main entrance you heard Harry sigh, “Y/N, shit…”
You twirled around to see him half naked, bottom half wrapped in a towel. You were so terrified in that moment. Getting pulverized by a meteor would be the best outcome right about now.
“D-did you-”
“Yeah.” You confirmed quietly before he could finish his question.
“Fuck…look ummm, I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.” He apologized, “I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking…” he shook his head nervously, “It’s a fucking family holiday.” He muttered and you sighed.
“No, I get it! You thought you were alone, it’s fine. Let’s just forget it.” You reassured.
“I’m sorry.” he apologized once more and you offered a small, sympathetic smile.
“I know.”
“What are you even doing in here?” He asked.
“Julie’s letting me borrow a bathing suit but I can’t find them.” You explained.
“Oh, she put those all the way at the bottom drawer with all her cover ups.” He informed and you huffed.
“Her stupid ass told me they were in the top drawer.” You mumbled and he chuckled as you headed over and opened the drawer Harry had said and sure enough, there were the extra bathing suits.
You reached for the bathing suit that she was obviously letting you borrow. It was obvious because it was a rust brown color and not some cute little pattern. It was a one-shouldered, cutout one piece bathing suit with a ribbed textured fabric that you knew you’d love gliding your freshly done nails over just to feel them slightly catch over each little ridge. You thought it was actually quite cute, but could see how your sister wouldn’t really like it as much as she initially thought.
“Well I’ll uhhh, get out of here. S-sorry again for ummm…eaves dropping.” You said as you fluttered your gaze away from his nervously. Harry chuckled a bit and you glanced to him again, happy that he had taken it lightly.
“Sorry for the literal sexual harassment!” He said with a painfully embarrassed expression on his face.
“If anyone here harassed anybody, it was me! Coming into an obviously…intimate moment and sneaking a peek!” You said to him comfortingly.
“Wait. You watched?!” He asked through a disbelieving laugh, “You just finished saying it was an 'eaves drop’!” He exclaimed and you groaned in embarrassment as you gave yourself up.
“I’m sorry!” You cried in embarrassment.
“Don’t be.” He chuckled with a careless shrug and you frowned a bit, “Not like that! I mean that you shouldn’t feel sorry f-for coming into this. I shouldn’t have been…you know? Especially with the door open. Like anyone could’ve come in, you know?”
“Sounds like we both fucked up a pretty equal amount.” You said and he nodded in agreement, “Let’s just… pretend that you were napping like everyone thinks you are and that I just grabbed what I needed and hurried out. Cool?” You asked and he nodded.
“Cool.”
“Alright, see you out there.”
“Yeah.” He said before you rushed out quickly.
“Y/N, can you wake H up? Tell him to join us!” Your sister called out and you nodded and opened the door back up and headed inside to find Harry with his face in his hands,
“She wants you out there.” You said and he nodded.
“I heard.” He said and you could hear that he was crying.
“Hey, what’s the matter? I told you that we’re good!” You assured him with a deep frown and he exhaled and shook his head.
“It’s nothing to do with you, I promise. Just go.” He asserted.
“No, no, no… if it’s nothing to do with me, then what is it?” You pressed and he sighed.
“Look Y/N, I just need some space, okay? Please get out.” He resisted and you nodded.
“Okay. Just ummm, get out there.” You said and he nodded again before you left.
You assured your sister that Harry was awake but you swore that it felt like an out of body experience. You could feel the steady beat of your heart at the base of your throat. You were also extremely turned on and you were concerned that the image of Harry’s solo session was practically burned into your longterm memory. The way he sounded and the things he said…they were on a loop in your brain but doing anything about it felt wrong. And as you dressed down you started to wonder if he had gone as far as carrying out any fantasies he had involving other people. Maybe he felt guilty for being caught but also for other things he had done? You didn’t want your mind to wander too far so you just took a deep breath and headed outside with everyone else.
When Harry joined in he just stayed on one of the lounges that was built into the pool, which was unusual for him. He was typically very active and playful but he had his headphones in and a book about social policy in hand. You couldn’t see his eyes through his sunglasses but when you attempted to, he glanced away, meaning you had successfully made eye contact with him somehow.
“Is Harry alright? He seems…off?” You said to your sister and she nodded.
“Yeah, he’s fine. He’s just a little moody over a disagreement we had about something.” She said and you hummed.
“Are you alright?” You asked next. Trying to fish out more information.
“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s him who has the issue.” She said with a slight scoff and you hummed. “Are you fine?” She asked and you shrugged.
“So-so.” You said and she hummed.
“I know that you’re sad about this right now but trust me, there’s nothing worse than committing your life to the wrong person.” She said and you frowned before glancing back to her.
“Are you just saying that or speaking from experience?”
“From experience! I married a really wonderful man!” She said a bit defensively, “That’s how I know I made a great decision. There were other men that I was so infatuated with but were not able to give me what I wanted or needed. Like-”
“We don’t have to say his name.” You cut in and she nodded.
“Harry is…the ideal partner.” Julie said with a shrug. “And you know, I never told you this, but he stepped up at the 11th hour. I felt like maybe I was never going to get married because of how much I work and all but he…he understands and supports me.” She said and you nodded.
“That’s really good.” You offered a small smile and she nodded.
“Now, what is taking Claudia so long? She’s supposedly making us all some Palomas.” She said as she turned towards the main house to try and get a look inside.
“She wasn’t in the kitchen when I came out. Maybe she’s in the bathroom?” You said and she hummed. But then you started thinking about the bathroom and Harry in the bathroom having a steamy shower. Your face started to heat with a blush and you just fanned at your face for a moment.
“It’s wild that it’s basically 80 degrees in December isn’t it?” She asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, but it’s nicer than being snowed in.” You said, “I did miss the weather the most.” You said, “I’m glad to be back.”
“Missed that more than us?” Your sister asked with a small smile.
“You know what I mean…” you mumbled and she smirked.
“We’re glad you’re back too.” She said and you smiled.
“Thanks.” You hummed.
Day Two:
When you woke up the following morning it was because the door to the pool house closed loudly. You sighed and rubbed your eyes before grabbing your phone to look at the time. It was barely 6:30 on Sunday morning and you were a little annoyed that your sleep time had been cut short. You were surprised by how easily you had been able to fall asleep and most importantly, you had stayed asleep through the whole night.
You laid there for a few minutes, staring at the designs of your ceiling from the light peeking through the blocks used to section off your little patio. You had committed to morning walks as part of your healing journey and intended on taking one later on but as you considered how much hotter it could get later on you decided to just wash up and go now, you were up anyway.
The neighborhood this AirBnb was in was gated and it only kept these vacation homes. You did see a few of them were rented out but most of them were desolate. When you finally started to circle back around you saw Julie walking down the corner of the street before your house. She walked down to the first house she encounter and then twirled around. When you were close enough to be within her line of sight you raised your hand to wave and she looked a bit startled at first and then put on a smile as she spoke quickly and waved with her other hand as she made her way back towards the corner of the side street. She hung up the phone as you crossed the street to reach her.
“Morning.” You greeted.
“Good morning.” She responded quickly.
“You didn’t have to hang up your call. I’m desperate to get back and have a shower. It’s already warming up.” You said.
“It’s fine…I shouldn’t have even been on the call while we’re here.” She explained.
“Work?” You asked and she hummed.
“Well, pick up where you left off.” you assured her.
“Thanks. I won’t be long.”
“Of course. See you back there.”
“Yeah, see ya’.” Julie hummed and you hurried past the next two houses until your reached your rental.
When you made it inside, much to your surprise, Harry was already in the kitchen, he seemed upset from how quiet he was as he cut up some fruits silently.
“Good morning.” You greeted him.
“Hey.” He responded as he spared you a glance before continuing with his task. “Did you run into your sister by any chance?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, she’s still on her call.” You said cooly and he glanced up at you.
“Was she?” Harry asked and you nodded.
“You know, I get that she’s a workaholic and all but I think you need to ease up on her about that. I know it was an issue before but I mean, you know how she was with this stuff from the start. Like, I get why you’d be upset when she does work stuff while on vacation, but it’s just who she is, you know? It’d almost be expected, I’d say.” You explained.
“Guess you’re right.” He mumbled as he continued doing what he was doing.
“Exactly. So stop brooding over things you have no control over. You’re just going to spoil your own time.” You said.
“Okay… whatever.” He mumbled and you smiled and playfully punched his arm as you walked by and headed towards your room to get showered.
***********
Harry was already in a bad mood and after what you’d mentioned to him, he was even more upset. There was something that had been weighing on his chest for the last several months. Something that he had hoped to talk to you about but with everything going on with your ex, he didn’t want to overburden you with his issues with Julie.
It was Valentine’s Day when he got an anonymous call from a private number saying that Julie was cheating on him, it had been left as a voicemail since he did not pick up the call. But even then, the voice had like an automated filter over it, so he paid no mind to it. But then, a few weeks later he’d picked up her phone because she kept receiving tons of texts and they were from a guy, a guy that he already knew.
Joseph was a friend of Julie’s from grad school who had landed the same internship site as her and they ended up getting hired at the same hospital in the accounting department. Apparently, they’d had a friends with benefits things going for a while before she started dating Harry. When he had asked if she had feelings for Joseph she admitted that while she liked him a bit more than she ought to, she knew that he would never commit to her, he wasn’t that kind of guy. And she assured Harry that she liked him a lot more. More enough to end things with Joe so that they could give it an honest try. It had been about five or six months of them being together when he caught her making out with Joe at a co-workers’s wedding. He ended things on the spot because he knew that there was history there. But when Julie came to him after a few days later, pleading and begging for forgiveness, the love he had developed for her broke him down and he accepted her apology. She promised that it would never ever happen again and he believed her. And to his knowledge, it hadn’t happened until he discovered that it had happened again. By the looks of it, it had been happening for nearly six months.
Of course, he confronted Julie about it and once again, she promised she’d stop but this time, he insisted they go to couples counseling to fix whatever was causing her to cheat and that she would need to allow him to look through her phone when he felt suspicious of her. Not forever, but just until he was able to trust her again. But during that time she’d also accepted a new job for a development firm, meaning no more Joe at work. So the counseling had been deprioritized by them both and whenever he’d ask to look through her phone it was never an issue and she always complied, so this made him feel even more trust towards her. And over the last few months he’d felt suspicious over a work trip she went on but found nothing and now she had been assigned to doing the budgeting and accounting for a big new project with a client from France which had her working longer or strange hours. But sometimes her stories wouldn’t add up. So last month when she told him she was working late he showed up at her office before the end of the day and sure enough, she left right on time but drove to the nearest suburb where he saw her meet up with Joe. It was happening again and he was just collecting evidence this time around. He knew that this phone call wasn’t for work, it was Joseph.
All day Harry was brooding, waiting for the opportune moment to confront her. Eventually, he found the alone time and he was looking in her eyes asking her to please just be honest with him.
“Harry, you’re acting insane!” Julie threw her hands up in defeat as she finally exploded.
“I’m not! I know what you’ve been doing!” He shouted.
“What?! You’ve seen my phone every time you’ve asked, there hasn’t been anything.” She insisted.
“I followed you one night, after you said you were working late.” He said and he saw her starting to tense in rage.
“What the fuck, Harry?! How could you do that to me?” She shouted.
“Because I don’t fucking trust you!” He shouted back, “I cannot trust you.” He emphasized and she shook her head. “Please, don’t try to fucking gaslight me. Just say it. Say it.”
“Harry…”
“I need to know. If you even have a shred of love or respect for me, you need to be honest.” He begged and she sighed.
“Fine…I’ve been seeing him again.” Julie admitted and Harry nodded with a sad smile on his face. His gaze drifted past her and focused onto the wall across from him as he just let the reality sink in.
“How long?” He asked monotonously.
“Just a few months.” She said. “I’m sorry.”
“What the fuck…” he sighed sadly.
**********
Your day was slowly going to shit. After you showered you picked up your phone and when you saw the memory it prompted you to view, you felt your heart sink. It was from your last Valentine’s day. That led you down memory lane and all day you were thinking about your failed relationship in some way or another. After lunch your parents and aunt went out to some market and you decided to just take a nap. You were startled awake a couple hours later because your phone started ringing. You huffed at the spammer who called and settled into the silence. That’s when you heard the shouting from the pool house. You sat up as it quieted it down for a few seconds before your sister was shouting louder than before. You still couldn’t make out what was being said but you hurried out of bed and decided to go break it up. You rushed out through your patio and hurried to the sliding doors, getting ready to knock when you heard Harry shouting angrily…
“I want to get divorced because you keep cheating on me!” There was silence and once again you found yourself overstaying your welcome to listen in. “I’m not just saying it like it’s nothing. Yes, I realize that it’s a serious step to take but this has gone on for long enough, Julie. I’m not going to continue to be committed to you when you’re not committed to me in the same way.” He said more calmly. When your sister started to cry you backed away and hurried back to your bedroom.
You were in complete shock that your sister was cheating on Harry. It seemed like the least likely scenario to ever happen to them. Especially for that to be something that your sister did! It didn’t make any sense! Even the day before, she had told you that Harry was the best decision she had ever made. However, that would explain why Harry was acting strange. If he already had suspicions and then you mentioned she was outside taking a call, you could see how his mind would go in that direction. More so when it was something that had happened before. You also felt really guilty now because you had quite literally just disappeared from everyone’s lives because of your own issues without really thinking that they might be going through their own challenges. To be fair, your sister didn’t ever like to show any vulnerability, so you’d never know that something was actually wrong unless you caught her at the perfect moment, but still. You could’ve at least asked her or even Harry!
“We’re back!” You heard your aunt announce as soon as you’d made it back into your bedroom. Do prevent them from hurrying off to find Julie and Harry you hurried out of the room.
“How was it?” You asked your aunt and parents as they congregated in the kitchen.
“It was nice!” She smiled and then your mom and aunt proceeded to show you the little knick knacks they had picked up at the outdoor market.
“We should get started on dinner. Can you get your sister and Harry, they were going to be in charge of dinner tonight.” Your mother informed and you nodded and made your way over to the pool house.
Thankfully, they weren’t shouting anymore, but when you knocked and Harry opened the door you felt the tension escaping from the room in gargantuan waves. While his eyes were a little blood shot he looked relieved to see you.
“Ummm, they said you guys were in charge of dinner tonight?” You informed.
“Right…ummm, Julie’s got a bad headache so she’s gonna try and sleep it off for a bit. Do you mind helping me?” He asked you.
“Not at all.” You assured.
“Thanks. I’ll be over there in a bit.” He said and you nodded and hurried back inside.
There was almost an unspoken rule that you were not to cook for your family except on their birthdays if they asked or on a holiday. You did it for a living, you were a private chef, so you cooked for people every single day for hours and hours. But this time, you were inclined to make an exception to stand in for Julie. While everyone else got showered and ready for dinner, you and Harry were in there preparing everyone’s meal. You were melting the butter down and getting it all aromatic with the rosemary and garlic while the filets marinated in their dry rub of seasoning that Harry had mixed up earlier. He had moved on to peeling potatoes he had boiled earlier in they day as well and he seemed to be very entranced with his task. You kept stealing glances of him to ensure he was okay and were dying to ask him if he was but didn’t want to risk upsetting him for eaves dropping once again.
“What’s wrong?” He asked without looking away from the final potato he was peeling and you sighed.
“I…heard you guys fighting.” You admitted and he glanced up quickly.
“Oh…all of it?” He asked and you shrugged.
“Basically and well, the most…important bit.” You confessed and he sighed. “I’m sorry. I was profanely just going to try and deescalate the argument because it was really heated. I’m so sorry!” You apologized.
“It’s alright. I’m glad that someone else knows now. I’ve been carrying this around for months at this point.” He explained and you frowned upon hearing this.
“I’m so sorry, Harry. Are you alright?”
“I will be once your sister agrees to a divorce.” He explained lowly.
“Why won’t she?” You asked and he shrugged.
“We can talk more about this later if that’s alright with you? I just ummm…I don’t want to risk someone else coming out and hearing this.” He explained.
“Oh, of course!” You assured him and he nodded before you just got back to your respective tasks.
Harry was very in his head and it made you feel sad for him because he genuinely looked concerned and sad. When you finished setting the rest of the vegetable to steam you excused yourself to get cleaned up for dinner. He thanked you for your help and let you know that he’d cook the steaks once everyone was at the table so that they could be cooked how each person preferred.
Once dinner came around Julie was acting completely fine. She looked extremely put together and refreshed. Her ability to just pretend like everything was fine made you feel a bit upset at her. What more could she be hiding behind that nonchalant facade? You were trying your best not to judge her too harshly but surface level you saw no reason for why she would cheat on Harry. A small and very petty part of you was satisfied that your sister’s life was not as perfect as she made it out to be, but you still felt sad for her and for Harry.
After dinner you all decided on watching a movie because Harry and Julie were going to go “get drinks”. They probably just needed to go somewhere private to yell at each other. Even after you headed to your bedroom after the movie, you waited up to see if you’d hear them come back or if Harry would try and talk to you. But before you knew it, you had fallen asleep.
Day Three:
You suddenly woke up from your sleep and felt in real time as your slumber started escaping you immediately. You sighed because it was just your luck that after having one really good night of sleep the insomnia would kick in. You were laying in bed for a few minutes scrolling through your Calm app in order to find some sort of relaxing sounds or even just do a meditation, but then you heard some foot steps and then the slight squeak of a door down the hall before you heard it being shut very gently. After a few moments, your phone lit up with an incoming text from Harry asking if you were struggling to sleep to which you replied “Yes.” And moments later he was peeking into your room. You glanced over to him and offered a sympathetic look.
“Are you alright?” You whispered your question and he nodded as he quietly walked in.
“Just…sad, tired, angry…” he mumbled as he sat at the edge of your bed.
“We don’t have to talk about it now if you don’t want.” You reminded him.
“Thanks.” He hummed, “Wanna get my mind off of it.” He exhaled.
“Do you wanna watch TV or something?” You asked.
“Actually, I have a collection of memes that I wanted to share with you but wasn’t sure if it was appropriate to when you had asked for space and I’ve been saving them this whole time! I need to show you.” He said and you found yourself smiling from ear to ear.
“I would love nothing more than for you to show me that treasure trove.” You assured him and he nearly squealed before he hurried out of the room to get his phone.
When Harry returned it was with the blanket from his new bedroom and he sat across from you, criss-cross style, and you mirrored his position as you waited eagerly for the memes. Image after image and clip after clip you were nonstop laughing and hyperventilating into a pillow. If there was one thing you appreciated about Harry the most, it was his sense of humor. You were both into very stupid humor about banal things. It often irritated your sister because you two would make jokes out of the most random things, everything had the potential to be unserious when you were around each other.
“Oh god…those were soooo good!” You laughed breathily. You were struggling to keep it quiet and Harry was very pleased with himself.
“I knew you’d appreciate them.” He smiled as he set his phone down on the bed. He suddenly noticed that you had gone quiet. So he looked over at you and saw you slightly smiling. “What is it?” He asked curiously and your gaze flickered up to his.
“Nothing, I just…I haven’t felt joy like that in a long time. It feels really great to laugh. Like really laugh. You know?” You asked and then glanced away when you realized how vulnerable you’d just been. You suddenly wanted to throw up.
“Hey…” he said as he gently squeezed your knee and you glanced up to him again, “I do know.” He affirmed sincerely before pulling his hand away. When he pulled his hand back you missed the warmth of it.
“Why don’t you leave her?” You asked him of your sister.
“I’m scared.” He said simply and you nodded in understanding.
“What happened with…?” Harry trailed off before speaking your exe’s name.
“They just came in one day saying they had doubts and were feeling unready to take the next step and that was that.” You shrugged.
“I’m sorry.” He frowned.
“I’m not…like it’s been really hard but I’d rather this than for them to feel obligated to go through with it and then we’re both miserable until someone has the guts to do something about it.” You explained and then frowned, “Sorry, I didn’t mean that as a dig to you. I think that realistically I would cling to whatever I could…it’s my fear that makes me pretend that I’m callous.” You explained.
“Wow…Therapy is working wonders for you.” he said with a grin and you rolled your eyes.
“Shut the fuck up…”
“I’m not saying it to tease you! I’m happy that you’re getting to know yourself! And to know your worth and your vulnerabilities. It’s admirable.” He said and you smiled softly.
“Thanks.” You hummed and he nodded. “Are you in therapy?”
“No. We did counseling together for a bit, Jules and I. But it didn’t really help. She was too busy with work to do the therapeutic work.” He explained and you hummed in understanding. “I’m really glad you decided to come for this.” Harry added after a few moments of silence between you two.
“Well, thanks. I’m not regretting it yet…” you said with a soft smile.
“A win is a win.” He chuckled and you nodded.
“Exactly.” You hummed.
“Well, I’m going to try and let you sleep. If you need anything ummm, I’m going to be staying in the next room over.”
“For the rest of the time?” You asked and he nodded.
“It’s that bad.” He explained lowly and you nodded in understanding.
“Well, I’m really sorry that everything’s going to shit right now.”
“Thank you. And thanks for holding space for me or whatever they say.” He smiled as he clambered off of your bed, “At least we don’t have to deal with this alone.”
“Right.” You smiled.
“Get some sleep. We have plans tomorrow.” He said and you groaned and let yourself fall against your pillows. You heard Harry snigger a bit as your door closed quietly.
Day Four:
Despite Harry’s warning to get some rest and your efforts to do just that, you’d had maybe another hour, if that, after he’d gone. At 8am sharp you heard movement in the kitchen and then some knocks at your door.
“Yeah?” You called out and the door creaked open and you saw your mom peek in.
“Hi, hijita. We have plans for today, will you join us?” She asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, I’m gonna go.” You assured her and she smiled.
“Bien. We’re leaving at 9:30.” She informed and you nodded in understand before she left.
After lazing around for a few more minutes you took a quick body shower before getting on some light make up. You got dressed and then headed out to get something to eat with everyone. You greeted your dad and aunt as they helped your mom with breakfast. You were making small talk with them as you moved around them to prepare yourself a cup of coffee.
“Harry! Good morning!” Your aunt exclaimed energetically and you glanced back to see Harry coming in through the sliding doors.
“Morning, everyone!” He greeted with a smile. He was portraying high energy but he still looked tired. His eyes then met yours and lingered for a moment before you got a little nervous and turned back around to finish making your coffee.
“Julie is awake, right?” Your dad asked and Harry nodded.
“Yeah, but actually, she said she’s feeling bad again and is going to stay behind and rest.” He explained.
“By herself?” Your aunt asked and Harry shrugged.
“I told her I’d stay but she insisted we all go. I think she just needs some alone time.” He explained. “But I think she’d appreciate if we check on her before we go.” He said and your mom nodded.
Sure enough, even when your mother had gone over to check on her, Julie declined going on the planned family outing and declined your mom staying to look after her since she was the one who had planned these excursions. So your aunt offered to stay with Julie because was afraid of heights and didn’t want to go on the tram and expressed that she also had no interest in the zoo, unsurprisingly, your sister accepted. So once that was settled the rest of you packed into your parents’ car. You buckled up and then glanced over to Harry who offered a half-smile to you before pulling out his phone. Moments later your phone buzzed and you saw it was a text from him.
Harry: The guy your sister is seeing came here yesterday to find her.
You glanced over to him with a frown and he smiled slightly.
Y/N: Is that why she stayed behind?
Harry: Yeah. I think she was hoping to get some alone time to see him. She didn’t know he was going to drive out. I think that’s what he was telling her when you saw her on the phone.
Y/N: Fuck. Well, lets just have fun today. I’m sure we’ll be able to get our minds off of things!
Harry: I think so too:)
The zoo had been pretty cool. Your mom had been dying to feed the giraffes so when your reservation time came up she was the first one to approach the animals. In truth, it was a very awesome experience. It was certainly something you never thought you’d do in your life, but you were so happy that you experienced it. After a stop for lunch you guys were on your way to the aerial tramway. You were looking forward to seeing the valley from up there. The drive up was beautiful and soon enough you were getting on the bus that would take you to the tram.
“Wow…” you whispered to yourself in awe as you slowly went past the tree line and saw the crazy formations of rocks littering the mountainside. Your mom and dad were cozied up beside each other on the other side of the tram. The slow rotation of the inside floor allowed you to see all of your surroundings. But then your attention veered from the scenery as Harry’s familiar scent invaded your personal space. You glanced to your side and there he was, standing right beside you. He looked a little apprehensive.
“Sorry for the proximity. Heights make me a little nervous and I get a little vertigo if I look down. I wasn’t about to go brush up against either of your parents for comfort, you know?” He explained lowly and you giggled.
“Yeah, I get that.”
“Thanks.” He hummed as he scooted just a bit closer. Close enough that his arm was brushing against yours. “You seem to be enjoying this.”
“I am.” You smiled.
“You don’t worry that the cable might snap or something and we all just… you know?” He asked and you turned to him with a furrowed brow.
“Jesus…that’s fucking dark…” You scoffed through a laugh and he chuckled a bit.
“It’s a real anxious thought I have!” He defended.
“I’m not judging. Believe me, I know about dark.” You said as the smile faded from your lips.
“I didn’t mean to dampen the mood.” He said when he felt your mood shift.
“It’s alright, it wasn’t you. It was my brain. It’ll pass.” You assured him with a small smile.
You saw Harry reach for the handrail and squeeze around it and glance up to see him squeeze his eyes closed for a moment.
“You alright?” You asked and he nodded.
“Yeah, I just ummm looked down for a second there.” He explained and then opened his eyes again. “I just wanted to see the view is breathtaking.” He said as he just kept his eye line level as he glanced around.
“It is. But I’m sure it doesn’t help that this thing is rotating.” You said and he groaned.
“Don’t remind me.” He mumbled through a smile.
“Well, we’re almost to the top.” You reassured him.
“Thank fuck.” He hummed lowly. “Your mom picked a good time, we’re gonna get to see the sunset from the top.” He said.
“Do you wish my sister were here?” You asked and he shrugged.
“Yes and no.” he said, “Yes, because I’d have someone’s hand to hold on this tram. And no, because I know she’d rather be here with someone else.” He said and you frowned. It was instinctive when you reached out and placed your hand over his on the rail. You gave him a reassuring squeeze before letting go and sliding it back in front of your own body. Your grip tightened as a nervous feeling made your stomach feel like it was swirling.
“Sorry.” You said quickly as your eyes met his.
“Don’t be.” He assured you and moments later you felt the warmth of his hand right beside yours as he closed the gap on the railing between your hands. You glanced down at the sides of your hands pressed together and then up at him. His eyes were already prepared to meet your gaze and when they did, you felt that swirling in your tummy again. Those butterflies starting to stir awake. “I know you’re just trying to make me feel better.” He assured and you nodded and quickly looked away.
Were you? In a way, yes, you wanted to comfort him because he too was going through a hardship. But at the same time you felt nervous about it. You couldn’t say that you didn’t find Harry attractive or charming. You were afraid that you were suddenly noticing this more than usual because of your current romantic turmoil. His immediate instinct to check in on you, to notice and care about your feelings. To be vulnerable with you and provide you the safety to be able to do the same. And then what you walked in on, on that first day at the house…that was definitely a contributing factor to why you were suddenly more aware of him as a person. As a man…
You were more than grateful when the tram ride came to an end just seconds later. You quickly got out and he followed behind you until you went up to the edge of the observation deck, that was just a little too out of his comfort zone. You put your hands on the railing and just took a slow but shaky inhale. It was significantly colder at this peak of the mountain so it kind of burned your throat to breathe that deeply but that sobered up your mind that was all fuzzy from Harry’s scent and words and existence in general. Your heard your mother approaching with your dad following behind, telling her to slow down.
“Are you okay?” She asked you as she came up beside you and you nodded and smiled.
“Yeah, I was just admiring the view. It’s incredible. Thank you for planning this.” You said to her with a smile before turning back to see the valley before you.
The sun was setting beautifully and despite the overarching theme of tragedy in your life for the last several months, in that very moment you realized how insignificant you and your problems were in the grand scheme of things. Things could be much worse. You had what you needed; your life, your health, your family and friends. After getting a few pictures taken with your parents by Harry from a comfortable distance you were all heading inside to the restaurant for your dinner reservation.
You were doing what you could to avoid having to focus too much of your attention on Harry but it was difficult. He was practically spellbinding. He was charming and funny and a gesticulative story teller so it was hard to not engage with him. But every time you looked in his eyes there they were again, those pesky little butterflies, some good and other not so good. They were a reminder that despite the excitement of being with someone that you got along with after so much time alone, you weren’t ready. The proof was in the fact that you were fighting off a crush on your brother in law! How much more twisted and pathetic could a person be? You were on your second cocktail by the time the appetizer showed up and your lack of appetite throughout the day was starting to pay off. You had gotten to the point where your lips felt tingly and your worries were soon to float away.
Making eye contact with Harry wasn’t as scary any more. Because it was just the four of you, you could get away with constantly looking at each other. You weren’t even being flirtatious about it, you were just admiring him. You admired how good he was at masking everything. All of the hurt he was in. All of the anger and disappointment that you knew were weighing over him like a ton of bricks.
Your phone chiming loudly from your purse broke you out of your spell of admiration. And then it went off again. And again. And again. And again. Your family and the patrons at the neighboring tables all honed in on you as you frantically reached for your purse while giving apologetic glances to the strangers.
“Sorry.” You muttered to your family with a smile. You had a strict “no phones allowed” rule when eating out together. You had every intention of just putting it on silent and just checking the texts later, you were just really enjoying yourself! But when you saw your ex’s name on the screen, the rose tinted haze that you’d been seeing things with for the past fifteen minutes instantly vanished. Your stomach did a nasty flip that had you wishing you’d slowed down. You needed to open your phone to see what they said, not being able to see it had your anxiety through the roof. Then your phone pinged again with a sixth message and you just stood up and hurried out to the viewing deck.
*** Harry’s POV ***
Harry could not stop thinking about you. Admittedly, the thoughts had started when he saw your profile on a dating app. Not on his phone, on a friend’s phone, he recognized her from his and Julie’s wedding party and had asked if it really was her. He looked through it and was smiling by the end of it. If he ever ran into your ex he would kick their ass for leaving you hanging like that. He had truly hoped that you would come for Christmas and was so happy that you had in fact shown up.
You were gorgeous, you’d always been. And maybe it was because of his emotional distance from Julie over the last several months that he just decided to lean into the attraction he felt towards you. Admittedly, it was stupid of him to have a wank without fully closing the bathroom door but he couldn’t help but be a little thrilled that you had crashed it. To him it felt like this little secret you shared now had you on a new level of comfort and trust.
Today, when you touched his hand on the tram he felt that long forgotten zap of excitement electrifying him. Julie wanted nothing to do with him, she was in love with another man for their entire relationship, so he didn’t feel too bad of indulging in a little betrayal himself. He could see that you viewed him in another way too but you were fighting it. He saw how it scared you and quite frankly, it scared him too. But feeling the things and actually doing something about were two very different things. In this situation there was a double safety. His flirting was safe because he wouldn’t do more than that and your acceptance of his minor flirtations was also safe because he knew that you wouldn’t act on it. Once you were a little more loose from your drinks your fear eluded you and he was very much enjoying that and then your phone interrupted everything. It had been nearly ten minutes since you’d left with your phone and he and your parents were feeling a little worried. The food would come any minute and
“I think it’s time I go check on her. Make sure she’s okay.” Harry said. Your dad nodded and he rushed out onto the viewing deck. He looked around and then heard your voice from somewhere. He glanced up and saw that there was another level. He hurried up and then heard you speaking angrily into your phone before hanging up. You were standing right up against the railing, it was freezing outside so there wasn’t anyone up there. He quietly made his way over but the closer he got to the railing the harder his heart would pound. He hesitated but the sound of you sobbing gave him the courage to walk the rest of the distance to you.
*** Y/N’s POV ***
“How fucking dare you!? You can’t just call me and tell me that after everything I endured! You don’t deserve me.” You seethed as hot tears ran down your face. You were practically trembling from how angry you felt. “Fuck you, Ash! Never, ever fucking call me again! Bye!” You shouted before hanging up and blocking the number. Your chest was heaving from how hard you were breathing. And when the adrenaline wore off you felt so fucking heavy and just started to sob quietly. You were feeling like you’d made a huge mistake and were just about to unblock the number when you heard your name.
“Y/N?” Harry called and you gasped as you whipped around quickly. Your fright dispersed when you saw his familiar frame approaching.
“It was Ash.” You explained as he stopped before you.“Just drunk and trying to get me back after all this time…The fucking gall to ask if we can start over!” you exclaimed angrily through your tears. Your head was shaking in disbelief.
“Jesus.” He sighed and you sniffled and nodded.
“Right? Like what the fuck?!” You scoffed and then exhaled sharply. He saw you shivering and pulled off his jacket to drape over you. “You don’t have to. It’s freezing up here.” You assured him.
“I’m alright.” He reassured you. “C’mere.” He instructed and he opened his arms for you. You easily stepped forward into his space to allow him to hug you, “Fuck that loser. Doesn’t deserve you.” He comforted you.
“I know.” You said quietly as you allowed your head to lay against his chest.
“Good.” He said supportively as he slowly rubbed over your back. When he looked up he realized that he was on the ledge of of the viewing deck and the view was completely breathtaking. It was even more magical now that the sun was nearly gone. The lights from the cities in the valley were shimmering enticingly in the distance. “Look how beautiful that is.” He said to you and you moved your head to look ahead of you and hummed. “Makes me wish I could fly.” He said lowly and you smiled.
“It really does…” you agreed. “I’m surprised you came up to the edge.” You added teasingly. He smiled and squeezed you just a bit.
“I needed to make sure you were okay.” He explained softly and you slowly pulled away.
“Thank you.” You expressed as you glanced up at him.
“Of course.” He smiled at you.
“It’s just… hard to talk about all of this with my family because they start to interject and give their opinions on what could’ve been done better and ugh…sometimes people are just shitty, you know? Regardless of what you do, nothing will change that!” You huffed in exasperation. Just thinking about the typical responses they would give you had you feeling a little heated. “Anyway…” you mumbled with a slightly flustered smile from your little outburst, but Harry was just smirking at you. It made your heart start pounding harder as you held the eye contact between you two for a few seconds. “We should get back inside.”
“Yeah, the food was just about to come.” He informed and you nodded and followed him back into the building.
The food and the company were both excellent. You were more than grateful that your parents didn’t try and question you about anything. You were huddled up against your parents for the tram ride down because it was freezing cold, though you really wanted to be huddled up against Harry. You knew that he’d allow it and that made you feel really pleased with yourself. The whole way back to the Airbnb you two were texting nonstop, exchanging glances every now and again, to the point where the tension was building. You weren’t even talking about anything inappropriate, it was just the energy of the quick closeness that had grown between you two. Upon arriving at the house Harry went and “checked on Julie”, which really was to shower and get ready for bed before heading to the main house to sleep. You expected to hear them argue or something but there was complete silence.
You plopped onto the center of the bed and pulled out your phone to waste time on Instagram and saw that your sister had recently posted a story. When you clicked on it you saw three cocktails clinking, your aunt was tagged and you rolled your eyes in annoyance. Seconds later Harry texted you to tell you that she was gone and you told him to check instagram and didn’t hear back for a while until there were soft knocks on your door. By then you were cuddled up in bed, propped up on the pillows, and watching Home Alone on the TV.
“Come in!” You spoke towards the door and when it creaked open you saw it was Harry.
“Would you mind some company?” He asked and you smiled.
“Absolutely not.” You assured and he hurried in, closing the door behind him before sliding into the empty side of the bed. As he was getting comfy he yelped when his foot accidentally touched yours.
“Jesus! So fucking cold!” He chuckled.
“Feel my hands.” You said as you reached over blindly because he was under the covers after all. Your hand found his and he gasped.
“Like a fucking corpse…” you chuckled and glanced at him briefly before turning back to the TV. But soon your attention was drawn back to Harry as brought your hand up to his mouth and gently blew his warmth breath over your open palm and then clasping it between his hands. “Giving you some warmth.” He explained, “Is that okay?” He asked and you nodded silently.
There it was again, that tension, building up some more. And like air in a balloon, it could only hold so much before it had to burst. His eyes glanced down to your mouth and you did the same to his. If he went for it right in this moment, you’d let him kiss you. Easily. You were covered in goosebumps from the anticipation. And then your eyes met again and you saw the conflict in them. That also made you hesitate and slowly, the burning in you started to fizzle.
“Sorry. Ummm…”
“Don’t be. You’re right to doubt! This could be so fucking messy. It’s stupid to even…like, no! We’re fucking stupid for this, Harry.” You chuckled through your disbelief at what you were about to do.
“I know…but that doesn’t take away the desire to.” He said and you sighed.
“I know! But we need to fucking…find it because I don’t want to lose you.” You explained with a hint of desperation in your tone and an earnest look in your eyes. Harry didn’t want to lose you either, so he just nodded and turned his focus to the TV. Your hand was still in his, being kept warm as he’d said. And you did feel warm with him. So fucking warm…
“Thanks.” You whispered to him and he turned and smiled before focusing back on the TV.
Part Two...
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