#ok…that’s all. enjoy…if you do at least

[purpamint]

Even after two years this is still one of my favorite comics I’ve made, and since it’s the holiday season, here’s the text version of it I wrote for it today that has some fun bonus details that I’m pretty happy with:

Back when Kris and Noelle back were both kids, they were opening presents while sitting by a Christmas tree. Kris is wearing their red horns that they supposedly wore a lot as a kid. Kris opens their present and reveals a green and yellow striped sweater. After Kris opens their present, Noelle cheerily says, “Merry Krismas! Dess and I worked together to make you this sweater!!”

Kris looks in awe, exclaiming, “WOAH!! so cool....”

Noelle gives Kris a thumbs up with a happy expression, saying “why don’t you try it on?”

“ok!”

Asriel and Dess are both looking at Kris now that they’ve tried on their new sweater. The sweater is visibly way too big for Kris.

Asriel is smiling, but his expression betrays the fact that he is a bit worried that the sweater doesn’t fit Kris, however he is still trying to stay on the bright side.

Asriel expresses, “It’s a bit oversized…”

Dess, focusing more on Kris’s enjoyment of the present than the size, looks to Asriel and assuredly states, “They seem to like it!” She proudly stands with her hands on her hips with a satisfied smile.

Kris wears their sweater with a delighted smile as if they were as content as one could be. It was as if in nothing the world could be better than as small as sweater made just for them. It was as if they would be fine if this one moment lasted forever.

Dess, continuing what she was stating earlier, laughs, “Hah! It doesn’t matter if it fits as long as they like it!” Clearly pleased at how much Kris seems to enjoy their present, she remains unbothered by the minor issue of the size. Asriel, less concerned after realizing Kris’s genuine joy at the sweater, finally agrees with Dess, albeit still reserved “I guess so!”

Many years later…

The world is completely black. It feels as if so much time has passed. The darkness only brings back those warm distant memories. The darkness feels like daydreaming with eyes closed. Those dreams feel real yet so fragile…

Noelle sees Kris while at school

Casually starting a passing conversation with an old friend, she laughs, “Woah Kris… talk about a flashback!! Fa-ha!”

It was like she was suddenly propelled millions of years back in to the past, reminded of both the embarrassing and the bittersweet moments.

Caught up in the moment of remembrance— almost as if all the years of distance between the two teens had suddenly melted away to potentially forge some sense of reconnection— she continues, “You haven’t worn that since…” Quickly trailing off.

Reality comes back like a tsunami of ice water over a blacksmith’s freshly re-heated piece of iron. The once re-shapable metal is now chilled and harder to change.

Now, the darkness has faded out.

Noelle couldn’t help but wonder about Kris sometimes. Why wear that sweater…? Not that it’s a bad thing, but it hasn’t been worn in ages��

With an inquisitive expression, she politely asks, “Any reason why you’re wearing it?”

Kris sits at their school desk slightly leaning forward laying their chin on their right hand. Their other arm lays on their desk as if they were partially crossing their arms. They do not look directly at Noelle. They almost appear as if they are not looking at anything at all— or at least not towards anything in particular. They have an introspective expression. Like they are thinking about old friends, old memories, old dreams… at least that’s what it seems.

“I guess I have been feeling nostalgic lately…” Kris replies. An indirect response like that from them was not unusual.

…but…

It seemed like that they were being honest.

It’s generally hard to read them, it was even hard to read them back when they were more open…but Noelle is so familiar with them that it is almost natural, even if the skill has a little bit of rust.

Kris looks softly at their sweater. It’s been so long since they’ve worn it, but they still remember the day they got it. They wished that day would last forever back then. Sometimes they still do. It felt so big back then, but now it matches their size much closer, even if it is a bit baggy in some places. But it’s honestly more comfortable that way… they never minded oversized clothes anyways.

They loved it so much because it was made with care, just for them.

It’s their favorite sweater…

It fits almost perfectly…

Little deltarune comic for the holidays! (About the Holidays too, wow) This took a bit longer to make than expected because I chose to make it on paper, so I had to do a bit of color adjustments to make it look right in the photos. Despite it’s lateness hope y’all like it! :D

[midnight-mourning]

Sneaky Santa

❄️❄️Midnight's DCA December Day 9❄️❄️

cooked this up last night for y'all, but waited to post to make sure it was actually coherent lmao, anywho, hope you enjoy! Edit: reviewed this morning and chat 2 am midnight was cookinggg

Prompt: ok ok i have a pretty vague idea that i really love. y/n would be a burglar who breaks into the pizzaplex on christmas eve/day (cos no one wants to work at christmas time, so there should be minimal security, right?..). but they quickly sense they are not alone and dca interaction ensues :') i feel like you could go different ways with this, full chase sequence, or just witty banter with the dca. you can play with around the y/n's motives for committing theft/breaking in. i'd love to see what you cook up :D

Word Count: 2630

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The side door opens with a click, and as it creaks ajar, you can't help the grin that splits your face. Success, and after 15 minutes of fumbling in the cold, you're more than happy to finally get inside. And get to work, for that matter. 

You shove your kit back into your pocket, and adjust your mask. Slinking inside, it's as quiet and dead as you hoped. Even the cameras, which you'd think they'd bother to power on for this very reason, don't seem to be active. All the better for you, really. 

Still, you proceed with caution, while the place is more than dead in terms of human staff, there are some bots lingering about. From the last time you were in here you think they were just called S.T.A.F.F. bots? Doesn't matter, you didn't need to take any chances. 

You keep to the shadowy parts of the building, making your way to your first stop; Chica's gift shop. You make quick work, grabbing the limited edition kids jewelry set, and a plush or two for good measure. You make similar stops throughout, a makeup set and costume from Roxy's, a gator golf mini club set, a microphone signed by Freddy himself. Not to mention again, anything else you can grab your hands on. 

You wanted this trip to count, if you were going to be doing something illegal, might as well go all out, yeah? 

You won't deny, it had been a bit of an inner conflict for you at first. You had morals, stealing was wrong and all that jazz. However, stealing from a multi-million dollar corporation who wouldn't even notice the teeny-tiny little dent you've made in their merchandise? Yes, still wrong, but surely not nearly as bad. At least, that's what you tell yourself. 

You glance briefly at the list in your hand, and the map in the other, as you chow down on a cupcake you swiped earlier. You're sitting on a railing overlooking the atrium, the area quiet enough to not draw any attention. Though, still so far so good from what you've been able to tell.

None of the main attractions have been out and about, and if you had to guess, they were either doing their own thing in their rooms—which, an odd but endearing thought to have—or they were simply powered down to conserve energy over the holidays. Regardless, you're able to check off the locations on your map, and the items on your list in an easy peace. 

As luck would have it, you're well ahead of schedule. Only an hour or so in and you're already down to your last location. Circled in red marker and starred; Lucky Stars Gift Shop. 

You'd saved it for last because it was one of the trickier ones to get to. But, with how easy the rest of the night has been, you'd argue it's well worth the risk at this point. While your haul was more than enough, you knew that if you could score there, you'd be set. 

So, finishing your cupcake with a wipe of your shirt sleeve, your off. 

When you arrive, much like all the other locations, the door is thankfully unlocked. You slip inside, and set to work. You were looking once more for a specific item in particular, in this case as set of pajamas. Smalls, along with a pair of matching nightlights if you could find them. 

You find the pjs soon enough, stuffing them in with the rest of your haul. It was starting to get heavy now, and you truly looked the part of a burglar with your big canvas sack. To be fair, it wasn't like you could fit all this in your backpack. Even though you'd foolishly considered it for a brief moment. 

The nightlights are a harder find, not anywhere within easy sight among the toys and stuffies scattered throughout the darkened shop. To be safe though, you swipe a few of those as well. 

You finally spot your prize while doing a sweep over the entire place, both set up on a high shelf behind the counter. You puff out your cheeks, of course they just had to be there of all places.

You shake your head, no matter. You weren't leaving without those nightlights. Especially after catching the sight of the price when trying to order online. Just for merch for the Daycare Attendant of all things. 

Setting down your bag, you start to climb onto the counter, swaying slightly in your rush. You lean over the gap behind the counter and the shelf, finding that you just barely can't reach.

You grit your teeth, and lean further, doing your best to keep your feet steady. When your hand makes contact with a box, you internally cheer. Quickly, you grip it, and the other while you're at it. 

You struggle to contain your excitement, giggling to yourself as you step fully back onto the counter with your goods. 

"Well now, what do we have here?"

"Something of a thief, by the looks of it." The voice turns darker, chuckling. "And not a very clever one, at that."

You freeze then, but keep calm. You were too close now. You weren't expecting any guards at this point, but certainly you could handle these two, you've come too far to not try, anyway. 

You turn, tone smooth. "Well, that's not very nice. I think I've been doing pretty good so far—" The words die on your tongue when you realize that the person behind you are in fact, one bot. One of the very bots that strongly resembled the ceramic copies in your hands.

The blue and white animatronic tilts his head at you, red eyes narrowed. Moon, from what you already know.

"You were saying?" He asks. 

Initial shock gone, you shake your head, huffing as you hop down from the counter. "I believe I've done pretty well so far, not to toot my own horn or anything. And with these, I'll be more than happy to get out of your hair. Or, whatever the equivalent is for you, I suppose." You stuff the nightlights in your bag, head held high. 

"Is that so? You'll just walk on out of here, without a bit of confrontation or trouble?" The naptime attendant sounds more amused than anything, so you'll keep trying your luck. 

You shrug. "Well yes, I really would rather not be a burden on you. Would hate to be the cause of disruption so close to the holidays. Consider it a gesture of the heart." You put your hand to your chest, bowing slightly. 

"Gesture of the heart—" Moon laughs then, hard. 

You take the chance to slip by him, crossing your arms as you lean against a clothes rack. "Something the matter? I'll have you know I mean what I say, especially to a pretty face."

"A pretty, pretty face?" He asks between chuckles. The bot pretends to wipe a tear. "My, you're a curious little thief aren't you?"

You wink. "I like to keep things exciting. No need for unnecessary tension and all that, you know? And if I wasn't on the job, well, I'd be using more than just my words, let's say that."

You're almost to the door now, hand ghosting over the handle. If you can get a head start, you'll surely make it. Unfortunately, you're not so lucky. 

"Well, I'm afraid to disappoint, but I believe tension is all I have to offer, you Star. I hope you'll understand."

You keep your eyes locked on each other for a moment more. Then, as he launches toward you, you rip open the door, running out into the light again. 

As you're running, you hear a voice call out behind you. "What? You're not going to try to woo me too? Am I good enough for you, Sunshine?"

"Of course you are!" You say back. "I just figured a change of scenery would do us some good, is all."

You find you have no other choice but to enter the Daycare itself. Certainly not your favorite option, but you can hear the playtime attendant gaining on your fast. You'll have to fake him out in here and hope for the best. 

He chuckles. "How kind of you! So tell me, what's convinced you this was a good idea, friend? You have me oh so curious."

"Ah, I wouldn't want to bore you with all the details." You wave your hand, then jump to climb one of the playset walls. "That's much less fun. Instead, tell me about yourself? You come here often?"

You hear him close behind, just missing at swiping your leg in his grasp. "Well, I live here, so as it would turn out, yes! You seem too familiar with the layout yourself, Starshine."

"What makes you think that?" You scoff. Though, you can't say he's wrong, you're just hoping the mask is enough to keep your identity a secret. Would hate to be banned now. 

You stare down at him, head in your hands as Sun stares up at you, rays flicking and eyes narrowed. "We got a peak at your little collection. You're well aware of what's the priciest items here! That's something that takes time, and planning."

"Aw, why thank you! If I wasn't preoccupied, I would return that compliment with more than just verbal appreciation."

He leans against the playset, gaze focused on you. "You could always try."

You grin, and for the briefest of seconds consider the offer, then shake your head. 

"Ah, I would. But I've got no guarantees it won't turn sour, in the end." You tsk drearily. "I'm afraid our love must stay as it is. Treasured from afar in secrecy. Surely you understand, no?"

 Sun nods, hand going to his faceplate just as dramatically. "Oh course, how foolish of me to consider such. If only—Hey! That's cheating!"

You snicker to yourself as you race across the playset. "I'm sorry, my dear! But time is of the essence. Perhaps another time I can listen to your sweet nothings—"

You slip, foot catching the wrong side of the plastic bridge. Your eyes widen as you begin to fall, then squeeze shut as you brace for impact. 

It doesn't come, instead, you find yourself in a reassuring grip. Peeking an eye open, you find Sun staring down at you, concern evident in his eyes. 

Your breathing is heavy as you wait for him to do something, anything. 

"I know those eyes." He says in the quiet. "It's you."

Ah, shit. 

In a state of utter defeat, and total shock, you wind up bound in a spare set of jump ropes, sat in one of the tiny chairs for good measure. 

Meanwhile, Sun is pacing the back and forth in front of you, speaking in a one-sided conversation to his counterpart. 

"But why, surely there's no reason for them to have been—"

"I know, I know. It's wrong, but that doesn't, no, no you're right."

"What if we, it might work. I just don't want to—" He turns to stare at you, then shakes his head.

You sigh. This blows. You'd spent so long planning this out, and now you're about to lose everything. Unless, you can convince them that you really meant no major harm. 

"Listen. I know this looks, bad. But I can explain!"

The bot turns to you then, curious, but suspicious. You don't blame him. 

Your head hangs low, guilt sinking in in that moment. "Look, money's tight. Really tight. Why do you think I come here to get daycare services? It's dirt cheap, you know. And, and the kids were just so excited for Christmas this year, I saw an opportunity and I just,"—You shake your head—"I'm not proud, at all. I just, wanted to give them something nice, you know? That's the honest truth. So, before you turn me in, please, just give me a chance. You can take everything back, but please let me walk out of here tonight. I, I won't come back, I'll find other arrangements, just please, please don't tell anyone about this."

You wait for him to start laughing at you, you expect it even. Even if it was the truth, it was still a ridiculous notion. All this for the sake of some toys? God, imagine what the cops are going to say when the get a load of this—

The jump ropes keeping you tied up suddenly loosen. 

Looking up, you see Sun's gaze is on you, unreadable in that moment. Then, he hands you your sack, and your backpack, and points to the door. 

"I, you're, you're letting me... really?" You're more than surprised, you're flabbergasted. 

He nods, helping you to stand. "I believe you, we both do. We've seen how much your care for them, and we understand. To a point, that is. Now hurry along, before it gets too late."

"I, I don't know what to say..."

Sun chuckles. "I think you'll be better off not worrying about your words for once, Sunbeam."

"Still, I just,"—you shake your head, and in a brief moment of unthinking, wrap your arms around the bot in a hug—"I mean it, thank you."

He stiffens, but returns the gesture. 

You pull away after a moment, slinging your bags back over your shoulders. "You know, if I'm not banned, we should um, do this again sometime. In a more, legal setting."

"O-oh?"

You smirk. "Yeah. What? I told you, I mean what I say."

You turn then, heading for the door before they change their mind. Though based on Sun's last words to you, you doubt that.

"We'd like that!" He calls, and for some reason, the sincerity of it makes you blush under your mask. 

Sure enough, when you discover that Freddy Fazbear's Pizza Plex is hiring, in Superstar Daycare no less, you find yourself easily able to fulfill that promise. 

"Almost ready for naptime, Starshine?" Sun asks as he comes up to where you stand leaning against the security desk.

You nod. "I am, but are you?"

"What makes you say that?" He asks, tone anything but innocent.

You tsk. "You've not been subtle today, Sunny. I can tell when someone wants to kiss me, it's my sixth sense, so to say."

"Just like how lock picking, bribery, pick-pocketing, and seduction~ are also your sixth sense?" He asks, leaning down to your height.

Your cheeks heat up, and you cough. "Of course."

Sun chuckles, closing the gap between the two of you with a brief peck. You are on the clock, after all. 

When he pulls away, flicking the lights off, you find Moon staring down at you with that same look. 

You huff, smile on your lips. "Let me guess, you want a turn now too?"

"Of course not." His hand cups your face with a tsk. "Could you think so little of me?"

You grin as he bends down further.

He shakes his head slightly, "No, I think I'll take a bit more than just one simple kiss."

"One not good enough for you?" You question. 

"Not for all the trouble you've been. I think at least three kisses are in order, to make up for it, don't you?"

Your arms wrap around his neck with a giggle. "Well, I certainly won't protest."

You meet somewhere in the middle, and just like you always do these days, find yourself grateful to your previous self for the, really, quite stupid idea of trying to break into the plex the night of Christmas Eve. 

Because sometimes bad ideas can have good outcomes, and this was a clear sign of that. 

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Thank you for the request @soupdweller!! Was a very fun little idea that I MAY have gotten carried away with hehe (i see the word banter and HAVE to go all out yk?), hope you had as much fun as I did :)

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[lemonlimestar]

I love love LOVE your art style -- it's so chunky and fun and lowkey reminiscent of woodcuts almost? Plus the amount of thought you put into your Anita costume redesign was just 🙌 so cool to read -- it really makes me wanna ask though: do you have any thoughts on Cassie's design (either current or previous)?

tysm :D <33 my anita costume is genuinely one of my favorites i’ve ever done so i’m glad to hear it :]

as for cassie’s designs, i’m not the biggest fan of her current one. under the cut bc i got kinda rambly

it reads very bland to me i guess, especially compared to the other amazons. the gwen-stacy-esque haircut is not doing it for me (and honestly worked better with her late yj98 & yj19 costumes, even if i still didn’t necessarily enjoy it in those either). i believe i saw someone say that she just looks too childish? which rings true for all of the core four rn to be honest. i’m also sad they scrapped her most recognizable color palette (red, gold, black, and white) that matches her friends :( like the blue added in Could work (and has before) but it falls flat imo.

her yj98 costume works a bit better as far as not being bland, but the skirt is just kinda there. this is more of a personal grievance but i really hate when costumes just have skirts just to have them when the character wouldn’t do that? did the person who designed this even read ww87 #153 smh. same with the color palette but honestly i think the jacket works better here, and i’d like to see this flipped into a aviator jacket rather than the jean as a nice middle ground between this and her leather jacket.

tt03 is it’s own can of worms & where the barbie-fication of her design is made the most egregious. these are pretty ok to me though! i think the way she’s presented is more of the issue + the long hair.

this one is 0/10. so many notes. i swear it gets worse every time i see it. only comparable one is the awful skintight n52 suit but at least that one has potential to be made into something cool.

these are definitely my favorite cassie costumes :) i lean more toward the one on the left but i love the shirt on the right. i tend to pull the most inspiration from these two when i draw her.

lastly, i’m a sucker for baby cassie. look at her stupid wig. look at her shorts and her skater gear. u wanna love her.

my adult cassie design from a while back combines her older yj outfits with some armor from other amazons + artemis specifically if only bc i’m sad that their relationship got deleted out of existence. i pulled in a teal as a nod to her blue jeans + to compliment the deep reds and blacks :^) i just really want her in armor… she’s grown up! she can have more details in her costume!

[savagewildnerness]

I wrote VERY erudite notes on Lestat’s lyrics…. 😂😅😇

Ok, BUT what Lestat is doing with his rockstar stuff is very similar to what Nicolas was doing with the Theatre des Vampires 200 years earlier. Both of them are actually revealing true vampire experience though art, which is perceived by mortals as only art.

But actually Nicolas did it in a more artistic & darker & meaningful way - with some kind of actual lesson about true evil in his art & the artistic expression of his own experience.

However, Lestat in true Lestat style goes all out on charisma & fun & entertainment & wants to create joy & enjoys the kind of pagan/religious/Witches’ Place Rapture of it all.

But, Lestat despises Nicolas’ art as a vampire: because it is so vampiric & inhuman. He calls it ‘petty’. But it *is* at least Nicki’s genuine expression. And Lestat - you and Nicki both *are* vampires! You made Nicki this!

In any case, what on Earth would 1780’s Lestat say to his own 1980’s art!!!?!

[in-a-bucket]

Project Eden's Garden CH 1 thoughts

hey so this probably isn't gonna be coherent at all cause i just finished the chapter and it took my like 12 hours to finish it so i have not slept but i just need to get my thoughts out lol

uh anyway major spoilers for the whole chapter you have been warned

so for the chapter as a whole i had a great time playing it! you can really see all the love and care put into this project. that being said, this chapter was CARRIED by it's deadly life/trial section, at least in my opinion. the daily life wasn't like terrible by any means it just didn't feel like a whole lot happened? the days felt really short, like the day you explore the new area is literally, wake up, meet in the dining hall briefly, explore the new area, and then go to bed. i was like ????? how is the day already done what. and then when the motive was introduced it was a bit lackluster, the concept was really cool with the pictures and the vague messages for the blackmail, but then we barely find out what anyone's information and the few people we do find out isn't super bad (expect for wolfgang kind of, maybe?), hell damon is not once concerned about the motive and none of the other characters seem all that concerned about it either which i think kinda brings the tension and stakes down. it's pretty evident when you find out the killer's motive as nothing to do with the blackmail and they weren't even concerned over their own blackmail so they have to create an entirely separate motive with the whole traitor perk thing, and it's not like that came out of thin air cause you're told about the secret prize from the get go i just don't get why they didn't use the motive they already made instead of revealing it all at the end of the trial from tozu.

ok whoops getting kind of off topic there but yeah daily life, it just felt like there could have been more, maybe it just has to do with the kind of guy damon is, but it kind of felt like we were dragging our feet from time to time idk maybe im just insane.

as for deadly life, holy shit they made some ballsy decisions here. can't really say whether they were good ones yet or not since we still have 5(?) more chapters but i have to respect the devs for who the first victim and killer ended up being (i'll get to them later). i remember thinking (man this is a pretty long investigation lol), although it probably didn't help that it took me forever to find the blood in the hallway i was genuinely so confused as to what i was missing I went back into all of the storage closets and like triple checked i had exgauhsted all dialogue, and then i was trying the move my mouse all over the place to see if there was anything else to search and then i finally found it.

the trial was so fucking fun, as devastated as i was due to who the victim was it was a ton of fun figuring out the crime and i genuinelly thought it was gonna be diana and i was gonna be done with the trial in about 2 hours and only to hit and intermission and realize i hadn't used like half my evidence yet. the mechanism of the crime was really cool too and i had a lot of fun solving it, even if i did start to lose the plot when it came to the stuff of the cord and the vent but that might've just been me being tired. I will say i did not enjoy the bullet hell argument whatever it's called at the very end, the artwork was really cool but it took me FOREVER to beat it, and myabe that's just cause i'm bad at video games but ti was so frustrating getting to stage 3 multiple times then loosing all of my health and having the start all over again. i think it would have been better if you run of of health you have to start from the beginning of whatever stage you died on but hey maybe i just suck at the game idk.

okay now on to some more character specific stuff, first of all WOLFGANG AKIRE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU GAHHHH

ugh i'll admit it, i'm actually devastated he died first like seriously thank god the trial was as good as it was cause i might have stopped playing if it wasn't lol. in all seriousness though i was so excited for how he'd handle someone killing and all of the reprecussions with that only for him to die first lol. i really hope that this isn't the last we get to hear about him though, like i hope he's not just like a passing thought in ch 2 and then never mentioned again kind of a thing like hopefully he'll be plot relevant in the future or something idk i just want more wolfgang he's my fav BRING HIM BACKKKK. maybe we'll get to learn more about him through grace cause i'm now like 99% sure they knew each other before this whole mess lmao i mean come on grace wanted to be roomies with him and she was so fucking devastated by him dying and didn't want people poking around his room like come on.

and just everything you find out about his situation in the trial is just devastating oh my godddd. i was really worried they were gonna pull the whole "omg guys wolfgang was killed in self-defense and he was actually terrible this whole time and you all should have believed me(damon) cause i was right all along memememememe" and they didn't thank god. just that whole scene where diana reveals their confrontation was just so good like that is one of my top fangan scenes of all time now. just all the stuff he was saying revealing stuff about his character that might NEVER BE ELABORATED ON CAUSE HES FUCKING DEAD NOW WTFFFF WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS. and the voice acting was fucking incredible holy shit NAD THE FUCKING SPRITE WORK OH MY GOD THAT SHIT WAS AMAZING. the sprites for wolfgang and eva (i'll get to her later) were so fucking good i mean just look at this shit

LIKE THIS IS DEVESTATING TO ME LIKE HOLY FUCK BRO I NEED TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON IN UR HEAD AND NOW I NEVER WILL CAUSE UR DEAD UGHHHHHH

it's really funny cause i actually ended up doing all of his FTEs not knowing he was gonna die

now let's talk about eva cause holy fuck girl. i remember after the prologue she was one of my least favorite characters, cause it felt like her whole personality was "ooooo look at how mysterious and cool I am ooooooooo", but then you get the reveal that she lied about being the ultimate liar and you get her normal talent and she actually shows an actual personality and is a video game nerd i was like "omg yes i'm loving the p:eg team's take on this!" and she was moving up my character tier list ranking very quickly, and then she was revealed as the killer and she tried to pin everything on damon and then her reasons for killing wolfgang in the first place and she went right back down to the bottom LMAO. not because i thought she had bad writing or something but at the end of the day her motivations for taking the perk were pretty selfish and while i agree that wolfgang shouldn't have been trying to isolate her like that she kind of put a target on herself for no reason by lying about her talent like girl what did you think was going to happen lol. also her execution was fucking brutal, it looked incredible but damn was it brutal, she didn't need to go out like that omg.

as for some other characters, always gonna love my girls grace and cassidy they were a delight as always and i look forward to seeing more of them, diana went up on my tier list and i'm looking forward to seeing where her character goes from here, i'm also really loving jean a lot but he feels a little too helpful so i fear he might die next chapter lol.

i feel like there's more i have to say but im so tried lol so yeah have whatever this is lol. overall i had a great time playing and everyone did an amazing job working on it (even if i am really upset you killed my fav), i look forward to whatever the next chapter brings!

[alaydabug2]

Secret Santa 2024

Run by @song-tam

This is my secret Santa project for my lovely cognate @wow-youre-so-pretty !

I have absolutely zero idea how I got you for it, but I had so much fun writing this!

Ngl motivation was so low it was playing limbo with the devil at first but then it finally started rolling

*cough* over 3500 word count *cough* 👀

Ummmm.... I was struggling really hard tk at least get 1000 believe it or not but... yeah

I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT!!!

(FYI this will probably be the last time you ever ask me to write you angst 😅)

⚠️CONTAINS UNRAVELED SPOILERS AND SUICIDIAL IDEATION⚠️

(Keefe pov)

The eerie stillness of the emotions in the hallway spooked him. He was hoping that by the time he went back to Foxfire, the silence of emotions would go away, and he could go back to normal. However, things seemed to be taking a turn for the worse.

Hopefully, his empathy teacher would be able to help him get to the bottom of what was happening. The lack of progress he'd made on his own made him apprehensive. If he couldn't turn his empathy back on, he didn't want to know where that would spiral to.

Then, with the other developments while he was with the Forbidden Cities, he felt like he was currently falling apart. His hands were cold, and the more walls he built around the pools of energy in his mind, the more than achy feeling set in into the palms of his hands.

He sat in the chair across from Lady Velle, his mentor. She studied him for a moment before starting the lesson for the day.

Keefe kept fumbling to pretend his empathy wasn't majorly screwed up at the moment. A cold sweat trickled down his back when Lady Velle finally held up a hand to cut him off. It had been the fifth one in a row he got wrong. Only one he had gotten correct, and that was truly just because of a lucky guess.

"What's going on with you, Keefe?" She asked. "You're usually spectacular at this."

He debated how much to say. After a couple of breaths, he said, "Say, hypothetically, an empath shut off their ability, and couldn't turn it back on. What could that empath do to get it back on?"

Lady Velle crossed her arms. He shifted his gaze away from hers.

"Hypothetically, that would be impossible," she informed him. "Abilities can't be shut off once their triggered."

"Ok. But hypothetically, what if someone did?"

She stepped closer, brushing her thumb across the back of his hand and furrowing her brows. Keefe tensed up, afraid his mental blocking might not be enough to keep from something awful happening when she touched his hand.

"Your emotions are difficult to decipher," Lady Velle murmured. "But there's a lot of uncertainty. And fear. How did you do this to yourself?"

Keefe wrapped his arms around himself, unsure of how much he should tell her.

"The human emotions, they were too much for my empathy. So, I tried to visualize a switch connected to all the emotions and shut it off. Part of the string connected to them were tangled, so I unraveled it. I haven't been able to feel emotions, even with contact, since."

Lady Velle leaned on the wall and sighed. "That... is a first I've heard of, to be honest. Quite a talent, I'll admit. But have you tried flipping the switch back on?"

He scoffed. Of course he tried flipping it back on! He gave his mentor a quick nod.

"Have you tried retangling the threads?"

He had... not. He shook his head.

"Try it," she urged.

Keefe closed his eyes. He went back to the giant switch in the back of his consciousness. The strings attached were straight and in uniform, side by side.

He tried to mix them together. Tried to intertwine them. Didn't work. Had he really shut off his empathy for good?

He opened his eyes back up. "Nothing."

"There was something else when I read your emotions," Lady Velle said. "Dread. Almost like you're afraid of your empathy. Like you subconsciously don't want it. Why is that? Because that could be all the difference to turning it back on."

Keefe shrugged. He wasn't willing to let slip that much. Besides, it wasn't just his empathy he dreaded with all the other crap he'd been putting up with. Some of which weren't his right to tell.

Lady Velle looked out the window. She started to speak, but the chimes of session ending cut her off.

"Never mind," she muttered. "We'll continue this Thursday. Go to lunch."

Keefe grabbed his satchel and hurried out the door. Saved by the bell. Big time. He'd ditch Thursday. He didn't want his mentor prying further into the rabbit hole that was his life.

He went through the line and sat down at the table beside Sophie. It felt like all eyes on him. He was suddenly glad not to feel their questions buzzing through the air. It, however, didn't take away the weight of their glares.

Sophie could see the way he shifted in his seat. He kept his eyes downcast from the others. After everything that happened, he didn't feel a part of his friends anymore. He felt like an outcast. Maybe he should have just stayed in the Forbidden Cities with Alvar.

Keefe could have been eating pancakes right now. Instead, he was back at the place of horrid memories. Especially when he accidentally caught Dex's eye.

He wanted to make a joke to lighten things up. But now that he couldn't read anyone anymore, he was afraid of making jt worse. And when he opened his mouth to risk it, his tongue was dry. He couldn't make himself to it.

He could feel himself cracking. Too many pairs of eyes were staring straight through his soul. He felt himself shaking. His breath quickened.

Keefe truly thought he was ready to go back to Foxfire. He hoped getting back in his sessions would help him make sense of everything happening with his abilities.

He hoped being back with his friends would boost his morall and give him more motivation. No. The opposite effect was occurring. All of them staring at him like he was an alien creature made him realize how much him running away affected him. His friendships. His perception of life. The awful things he couldn't let slip. Not Alvar. Not Eleanor. Not his new healing ability.

He had never felt so outcasted. Not even his first few months at Foxfire, before the Great Gulon Incident that earned him his street cred. At least then he had Fitz. Not that he'd ever admit it out loud, for a while, they were the weird kids in the level.

This felt like a deeper kind of isolation.

One where he didn't know if there was a way out. One if he even thought living on to see another day was worth it. With the mixture of hopeless doom spiraling him into a darker head space and his mother's plans for him. He was genuinely considering the unthinkable.

The only thing stopping him was not having the stomach to do it himself. Sure, he was better with violence than most other elves. But taking his life with his own hand was too much. As much as everything hurt. As much as he couldn't stand to stay on this hopeless planet anymore. The thought made his nauseous and dizzy.

Keefe shook out of his dark train of thought when Jensj across the table told him, "Long time no see." A grin. "Glad to have you back!"

Keefe plastered wobbly, unconvincing smile onto his face. "Glad to be back," he lied.

Since when had Jensi been back sitting with them? Every time he thought he knew how much time had passed since being at school last, he was proven wrong once more. How much did he miss?

Keefe followed along the conversation best he could, more things he didn't understand being brought up, reminding him of how far left behind he was. He tried to stay out of the conversation.

That was until Jensi asked him, "Hey, Keefe, could you please pass me a napkin?"

Keefe glanced beside him to where the little black napkin dispenser was. "Uh, yeah, sure."

He stretched his arm across the table. But as he passed the napkin, their fingers brushed. Keefe froze.

No. No, no, no, no. No!

Keefe had built thick mental walls to keep this from happening. Why else did his hands feel so freezing cold it ached?

But it was unmistakable. The empty hollow feeling of someone who would never manifest. Of someone who was talentless.

He never wanted to feel that ever again in his life. But now, he had. And he felt sick.

He didn't even know whether Jensi had manifested or not yet. Now, here he was, with the knowledge that He. Never. Would.

Another burden on his shoulders. Another secret to carry. Another straw on the camel's back.

It was too much.

Dex gave him a look, sensing the wild look in his eyes. The quick nod Keefe gave in response said it all. Dex's face dropped.

Keefe was shaking. He excused himself to the bathroom and ran off into the hallway. He slid back against the locker and placed his head between his knees. Breaths came quick and short

Not again. Not again!

Another life he had ruined. Was he supposed to tell Jensi? How was he supposed to do that?

Jensi was close to the manifesting cut-off age. Could Keefe pretend to not know until he inevitably finds out. Did he already know?

Probably not. If so, he likely would have been kicked out of Foxfire already.

If it's going to happen anyway, would it be cruel to keep it from him? It's not like with Rex, who had years of hope left. Jensi was very well close to the age where, if you haven't manifested, they weed you out of the system.

Should Keefe rip off the bandage for him?

Keefe clutched his hair. Tears finally escaped. This was a nightmare. He couldn't deal with this. He didn't want to be the one deciding someone's fate.

He wanted- needed -it to end.

Maybe Ro left some lethal microbes back at the Shores of Solace. That mixed with a sedative would make it bearable.

Steps echoed through the empty hall. Keefe didn't have the willpower to pull himself together. He already decided he wouldn't be here much longer.

"Keefe?"

Keefe whipped his head up to meet Dex's eyes.

"It's not your fault." Dex sat beside him. "It's still going to end the same way if you hadn't found out."

Keefe sat on that for a second. "I have to tell him," he whispered.

"No, you don't," Dex assured him. "Sometimes oblivion is better."

"He's already to where they can take him out of Foxfire. If that's going to happen, I don't want him to think, 'What if?', you know."

Dex didn't speak for a moment. "I suppose you have a point. But are you sure you want him to know about your ability?"

"Not really. But... he deserves this more than I deserve privacy."

"I'm pretty confident that, if you ask him to, he won't say anything to anyone about your ability."

"You think?"

Dex pondered for a second longer. "I believe so. Question is, when do you want to do this?"

Keefe thought of his little microbe plan. "As soon as possible."

"So today or tomorrow?"

"That would work."

"If you want, I can be there when you tell him," Dex offered.

Keefe shook his head. "This is something that I need to do alone. I won't say anything about your brother in case you're worried about it."

"If you're sure he truly won't say anything, you can tell him about Rex if it helps soften the blow."

Keefe nodded. He dried his eyes before leaning his head back against the locker.

"Do you plan on heading back to lunch?" Dex asked.

"No. You can head back, though. I'll be fine here."

"Nah." Dex pulled his knees into his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs. "I think I'll stay."

Keefe closed his eyes, wishing he was a telepath so he could give Dex a silent thank you. Instead he settled for trying to gather his thoughts in the quiet of the hallway, grateful to not feel totally alone.

The next day, Keefe waited in the same hall during lunch. He had asked Jensi during orientation to meet him there to talk.

The sound of someone heading down the tiled floor had his heart skip a beat. The curly headed boy appeared from around the corner.

"Sooo," Jensi drawled out the word. "What did you want to talk about?"

Keefe's mind drew a blank. He was regretting deciding to this plan.

"I wanted to talk about... ability detecting! How's it going?"

"Ability detecting?" Jensi asked. "That's what you wanted to talk to me in private about? If that's it we can talk about that at the lunch table." He turned to go back from where he came. "Cause I'm hungry."

"Wait!" Keefe squeezed his eyes shut. "It's not just about ability detecting. Has anyone told you about me manifesting a new ability yet?"

Jensi turned back around. "Kind of. They've mentioned it. But it was always vague, so I don't know what it is."

"Yeah... about that." Keefe's heart pounded against his ribs as a warning. "I can tell what people will manifest. And trigger it."

Jensi's eyes widened. "You can?" He got an overly giddy grin on his face. "Are you going to do that for me?"

Keefe needed to choose his next few words very carefully.

"I already did. Yesterday when I passed you the napkin."

Jensi tilted his head. "You did? When will it kick in? Is that why you left lunch? Does it take a toll on you or something?"

Keefe closed his eyes and swallowed. "You could say that. And... it's usually overnight when it kicks in."

Jensi furrowed his brows and studied his hands. "I don't feel any different. What was it?"

Keefe leaned against one of the lockers for support. He could already feel his knees shaking.

"Yeah. Before I tell you this text bit, can you promise me to keep this a secret? My ability can be mentioned at the lunch table. But this... you can't tell anyone. I got permission to tell you this as long as you can keep quiet. Can you do that?"

Jensi nodded.

"Ok," Keefe continued. "Yesterday, when I touched your hand, it felt... hallow. Empty. I've felt this twice before that. When I touched Rex's hand.... and Kesler's."

"But... Kesler never manifested."

"I know."

"But Rex..."

"I know."

Realization set heavy into Jensi's usually happy demeanor. He bit his lip hard.

"So your telling me... I'm talentless?"

"I'm so sorry. I wish I knew how to control this ability, and I thought I did, but-"

"It's ok," Jensi cut Keefe of from his downward spiral. His chin wobble. "I... had a feeling this was coming. Usually if you haven't manifested by level four, your not going to. I've just been waiting for them to finally give up on me and pull my classes."

Keefe nodded solemnly.

"I'm gonna head to lunch," Jensi told him. Keefe could feel the broken truth in his eyes even with his empathy screwed. "Are you coming?"

Keefe chewed his lip. "I'll be there in bit. You go ahead, I'll meet you there."

Jensi nodded and took a breath before heading back down to the lunch room.

Keefe went into the bathroom. He splashed his face with water. When he looked back at his reflection in the mirror, he could hardly recognize himself.

He was sixteen. But the heavy bags under his slightly crazed eyes mixed with his unusual palor made him look like an ancient. When he ran a hand through his hair to try and refresh its usual fluffynes, he half expected sharp points on his ears to poke through the blonde.

This wasn't a life he wanted to live.

He'd go straight to the Shores of Solace after school to look through the remainder of Ro's microbe stash, he'd decided. He already knew there was slumberry tea in the kitchen. He'd go out to the patio on the swing out by the ocean, somewhere quiet and peaceful, and do it there.

The end of the day rolled around. Keefe tried his best to separate from his friends to get to the leap master alone. Just when he thought he was in the clear, Sophie seemed to have materialized behind him.

"Keefe, where you going?" She asked him.

"I'm just going to get something from my dad's," he responded a little too quickly.

Foster's face fell. "You're not... leaving again, are you?"

She thought he was running away again. But... it was better for her to think that. She'd never let him out of her sight if she knew what he was planning to do. She cared for him. Way more than he knew he deserved. This was just another way he was letting her down.

Was he selfish for this?

Maybe.

But he wanted nothing to with his mom's plan. And he wanted nothing to do with these abilities. All of the secrets he was keeping from his friends would die with him.

This would be the one smart move he'd make in this game of life and death.

Making sure none of the information he had would live on and had the chance of slipping free. Making sure no more people's lives were ruined.

"I'll be back." Keefe leaned down and kissed her forehead, taking a moment to drink in her warmth as she wrapped her arms around him. "Promise."

A lie.

Like all of the other things he told her after coming back home. What was new.

But he found peace in knowing it would be last one he'd ever tell her.

One more thing bubbled in the back of his mind. One thing, if he didn't know what he was about to do, he would probably come to regret.

"I love you, Sophie." He closed his eyes, too afraid to see the look on her face.

"Keefe," her almost angelic voice rang out. Her hand ruffled through his hair, eventually coaxing his eyes open.

Her's were filled with tears.

"Please don't go again," she begged. "We're supposed to be team, remember?"

Her hand moved from his hair to cupping the side of his face. He couldn't help but lean into her touch, resting his hand atop hers.

"I have to go." Tears quickly welled in his eyes. When he blinked, they slid down his cheeks. "I'm sorry."

Sophie brushed them away with her thumb. She closed her eyes for a couple moments. Her eyebrows scrunched together.

When she opened them back up, they were almost pleading. "Come to Havenfeild. Just for the night. To make a plan. To help you pack." She paused for a breath, a fresh batch of tears brewing in her gorgeous gold flecked eyes. "Please?"

Keefe swallowed. "Ok."

He'd go through the motions. And then he could get back with his original plan.

Foster hooked her arm through his, pulling him into the beam of light to Havenfeild. As soon as they glittered into the pastures, Sophie turned and tackled him with a bone crushing hug.

"Keefe Sencen, I swear," she warned, "If you kill yourself I am going to murder you."

Keefe's jaw went slack. "How did you-"

"I read your mind," she admitted. She pulled back to look him straight in the eyes, keeping a firm, almost painful, grip on both his biceps to keep him from twisting from her grip. "I'm sorry, I truly am, but I had a feeling I needed to. And I'm glad I did."

She threw her arms around his neck, pulling him down. "People care about you, Keefe. I love you," she whispered.

Keefe felt his throat become thick. He had to clear it several times before answering, "But that isn't why I'm doing this." He tried to pull away. "This is because of my abilities."

Sophie yanked him right on back down to her. She cradled his head down on her shoulder. Resigning to his predicimen, he buried his face into her neck. He inhaled the soft scent of her panakes perfume, giving him flashbacks to the clearing in The Grove. It only succeeded in making his heart heavy.

"We'll figure something out. I promise," she whispered.

"And how many people will I hurt in the meantime? I can't do this anymore, Foster," his voice cracked. The pitiful sound made way for the gut wrenching sobs that wracked his body. "I! Can't! Do! This! Ok?"

Sophie held him tighter to her. She carefully lowered them down to the soft grass. She kissed his shoulder.

His own cries of mental anguish drowned out any of the other noises of the world. Slowly the sobs slowed into hiccups and whimpered. However, not by his own accord.

Soon a warmth filled it's place. Like the crackling of a fire on a cold winter night. Brightening up the chilling darkness. Comforting his aching soul.

Was Sophie... inflicting on him? Positive emotions, that is.

She untangled herself from him to look him in his icy blue eyes. "Hey. Can you talk to me now?"

He wiped at his eyes, nodding.

"Swear to me, Keefe. Swear to me that you won't even consider doing that again before talking to me. Before we can actually come up with a plan to help you."

He looked away, ashamed with his awnser. "I can't-"

"No, Keefe!" She snapped, startling him with her tone. "Swear. Swear on Silveny's life!"

Keefe squeezed his eyes shut and pursed his lips. He tried very his best to mean it when he awnsered, "I swear."

He'd try. He'd try his absolute hardest. For her. She deserved that much.

She must've been able to tell he meant it. That or she was reading his mind again. Either way, she pulled his face closer and kissed him. He melted at her touch.

This. This feeling was worth living for. If nothing else, this.

This amazing girl in front of him cared for him like no other person did. He'd do everything in his power to fight off the dark thoughts deep in his head.

For Sophie.

She finally broke away. She studied him for a minute.

"Come on," she told him. "Let's go inside and get comfortable. There should still be some mallowmelt left if I recall."

Keefe pulled himself to his feet and started to follow her in. Just as they entered the threshold, she turned back and smiled at him.

"It will be ok," she whispered.

And funny enough, he believed it.

[cruesuffix]

this was something that came to my head just a little before I went to bed so it might not be the most coherent thing. still…i post what i want so here’s that sweet cringe for whoever wants it. (side note: i kind of based this off of what happened to my pal ****** you know that one kpop idol? yeah…i guess this is sort of a crossover?? oh well, i’ll stop yapping now!)

At first it was just a slight discomfort. A twisting of his stomach that started in the middle of a gig. The band was nearing the end of a year spent recording an album and beginning the tour cycle. Christmas was in a couple of days and they would be getting a nice break for the holidays. The show went on, with Mick becoming more and more aware of the pain in his stomach. He wondered if he had eaten something bad the day before and he just happened to feel the effects of it while on stage. What terrible timing.

He forced himself to focus on his playing, reminding himself he could always rush to the bathroom after their set. He kept his head down, not wanting to look at Nikki or Vince and have them see how much pain he was in. As soon as the last note is played and bows have been taken, he rushed off stage in search of the first bathroom he can find. The pain is dull, and it throbbed throughout his abdomen. No matter how hard he pushed, nothing came out. He exited the bathroom feeling slightly uncomfortable and confused, but ultimately decided he was just a bit crampy.

That’s just how he was sometimes. Certain muscles got sore, felt achy, then went away. He caught up to the rest of the band who were heading towards the tour bus. They were supposed to head back to the hotel, pack their things and sleep so they could head to the airport early the next morning. He laid on one of the little couches in the tour bus, still feeling like absolute sht. Whenever someone tried to come up to him, sensing something was up, he bared his teeth at them and glared. He didn’t want to talk to anyone at that moment.

All he could think about was going back to his hotel room and going to sleep. He never unpacked any of his suitcases so he didn’t even have to worry about running around and cleaning up. He didn’t notice the rest of the guys have been looking at him. They weren’t surprised by his typical anti social behaviour, but they were surprised he never kicked up his feet and downed a beer like he usually did after a show. In fact, he looked incredibly uncomfortable, lying there on the couch almost in the fetal position. They didn’t know he even was able to fold himself into such position. They’d never seen him in such a way before.

When they finally arrived to their destination, they all piled out of the bus. Mick was the last one off and he couldn’t help but nearly drag himself out the bus. He was both tired and in pain so he took his time getting off and walking back to his room. Like always, his room was next to Nikki’s. He hoped Nikki didn’t go crazy and make too much noise like he usually did. He’d was actually dying to sleep that night and rid himself of whatever sickness he’d caught this time. All he could do when he got inside his room was flop on the bed and promptly close his eyes. He’s out like a light, still in leather pants and a t-shirt, leather jacket having been discarded as soon as he walked in.

The next morning, Mick felt himself being shaken awake. He cracked an eye open. If it was even possible, he felt worse than he did yesterday. The light in the room seemed so bright, he could barely open his eyes. A voice rang out, he could barely make out the words.

“…an’t you’re burning up, man!” The voice exclaimed. He squinted his eyes a bit just to figure out who the voice belonged to. He could barely focus, the only thing on his mind was how much pain he was in. His body felt like it was on fire, his insides feeling like they were being cooked. He wheezed out a breath and immediately felt nauseous. He could faintly hear footsteps rushing into the room, and someone replaced the person who was in front of him.

“…an you hear me? Hey, Mick are you ok?” Someone asked. He tried to nod his head, but just the sheer movement made him groan. His head was swimming and it was hard to focus on something. Someone dipped their head right into his face and he was forced to look at the person. As he focused on the features, he suddenly had a name for the person in front of him. Doc, their manager. He sighed in relief. Doc repeated his question and this time Mick shook his head.

“I-ugh, think I’m coming down with something.” He managed to tell him. Someone in the background shook their head.

“He’s burning up dude, he looks out of it. I don’t know what it could be, maybe an overdose?” The voice, Tommy’s, replied. Mick frowned. As if he’d do something stupid like that. No, he hadn’t taken any drugs the day before…at least not that he could remember. Besides, drugs were a Tommy and Nikki sort of deal, they usually weren’t Mick’s go to boredom buster.

“No, it’s my stomach. It- It was hurting real bad yesterday. I think I’ve got food poisoning or something.” He countered. He tried to bite down another groan as another harsh cramp hit his stomach.

Doc looked at him, just concerned at the image of the usually tough guitarist bent down and grasping onto his abdomen. He looked back to see Nikki peering into the room. Great, now they had an audience.

“Maybe we should get a doctor to check him out.” Nikki commented. Doc nodded, going to phone a medic. Nikki walked into the room and sat down next to Mick. The movement jostled the sick man, who finally allowed a small groan to escape. Nikki instinctively wrapped an arm around his shoulder. He pulled him closer, and was amazed at the fact that he hadn’t had an eye clawed out.

“What could you even eat to give you food poisoning? We’re in Florida not Japan!” Nikki lightly joked.

Mick didn’t answer him though. His eyes fluttered open and closed. He was sure he was either going to pass out or vomit all over Nikki. He was hoping for the former, he wasn’t sure he’d be forgiven if he puked all over his bassist. If he had been in better condition, he wouldn’t have slumped onto his bassist, head falling onto his shoulder. Nikki moved his arm from his shoulder to his waist, practically propping him up as they waited. When Doc came back, he brought a medic with him. The medic checked Mick out, while Nikki kept a firm hold on him. There wasn’t much the medic could do. He was sure Mick had come down with some kind of pneumonia, or even an infection. All he could do was turn to Doc and say something about a hospital. Nikki’s stomach sank. He had been hoping it was nothing too serious. Maybe a stomach bug that would go away on its own, or even an unserious case of food poisoning. Hearing the words pneumonia and infection put together in a sentence had him infinitely worried.

Doc motioned for the both of them to get up, but when Mick tried to, he could only groan and fold inwards. He clutched his stomach, whimpering at how fast the pain had gotten worse. Nikki took charge and tried picking the older man up, who could only clench his jaw to stop from screaming. Nikki immediately stopped and decided to turn around and let him climb onto his back. This seemed to work and, with Tommy in tow, he carried Mick with him. They followed Doc and the medic as they rushed to his car. Tommy shared a nervous look with Nikki the whole way round. They were both really hoping they wouldn’t have to lost their guitarist right when they hit their stride.

The whole car ride was tense. Nikki couldn’t stop shaking his leg and Tommy nervously conversed with Doc, who couldn’t deny him a simple distraction. Nikki found he couldn’t take his hands off the older man. Mick kept his eyes closed the whole ride, barely acknowledging Nikki’s nudges and questions. He simply melted into the touch, something he never once allowed himself to. Nikki’s surprised by this. It’s like finally taming a cat that’s hated you the whole time. He doesn’t even know if he should be afforded such luxury. Still, he does his best to soothe him, petting his soft black hair and telling him he’ll be ok. He wasn’t even sure he believed that, but he wasn’t going to say anything.

Mick didn’t remember anything of that car ride. He didn’t remember being pet or held by Nikki. He did remember a sort of warmth spreading all over him. He did remember a sort of safe feeling. He remembered not feeling worried about his situation for some reason, just as much as he remembered the pain he felt during that day. He just didn’t remember Nikki holding him. And he sure didn’t remember much about the next minutes; being carried into the hospital, a lot of yelling and screaming, puking right on Nikki, who could only try his hardest to calm him down. The most jarring of it all, which he definitely blocked out of his memory: he was crying the entire time. He’s never cried in his adult life, not once. Not when his kids were taken away from him, not when he went to jail for unpaid child support, not even when Vince got into his car accident and no one knew if he was alive or not. No, nothing got past the impenetrable Mick Mars. Yet, as Nikki stood, holding him in his arms, he was sobbing. The pain must have been pretty bad for him to do that. Of course, he wouldn’t remember any of that.

Nikki and Tommy, however, knew everything. They knew that their guitarist had appendicitis and needed surgery on his appendix immediately. Tommy paled as soon as he heard that and Nikki had to sit down. It was a necessary procedure and they were lucky they had caught it on time. Nikki could only blow out a nervous breath and Tommy needed air fast. Doc made sure they got the room immediately and Nikki rushed after him, still carrying the semi conscious man in his arms. Tommy stayed back, still pacing back and forth.

After depositing Mick onto the bed, Nikki was ushered out of the room and had no choice but to hang back out in the waiting room. Tommy was still there pacing. Nikki smiled softly and walked up to him.

“Why don’t you go out and have a smoke or something…take the edge off your nerves.” He suggested. Tommy paused. He looked hesitant. Nikki knew he didn’t want to leave, in case anything went down. He reached over and put a hand on his shoulder, stopping him in his place.

“Seriously, it’s ok. You can’t stay here and just pace, you’re making everyone else nervous.” He lightly joked. Tommy sighed and gave him a sad smile.

With a nod, he walked out of the room, reaching into his pocket as he did so. Nikki chuckled slightly and sat down on one of the hard plastic chairs. They really needed to get comfier chairs. He squirmed around, half trying to get comfortable, half trying to calm himself down. He was fine, they’d take care of him. He got why Tommy had to pace around. The suspense would kill anyone else. His foot tapped a million times per second.

He was never a smoker, thinking it a worse habit than the drugs he did, but it was moments like these where he wished he had picked it up. Anyone else would have just left. Vince was probably already back in California by now. Nikki himself was surprised he stayed. He probably would have been back in sunny California with a needle in his arm by now, as harsh as it was to think that way. Fear overtook him. Maybe that was why he was still here. For all his trash talk and evil ways, he cared so much about that man. He never thought he could do that, care.

Mick was so nice, so caring towards them all, even when he wanted nothing more than for them to all go away and leave him alone. He put up with so much, and they constantly took advantage of that kindness. It paid Nikki nothing to simply be there for him. The fact that if they had left Mick to his own devices, he wouldn’t have survived it, was a shock alone. That was the last thing the band needed right now. Nikki looked around the room. There weren’t much people here. Seemed like mornings were pretty chill until afternoons hit. That’s when the real drama started. A glance at the hall signals the return of Tommy, this time bringing Doc along. The two of them carried coffees in their hands and Tommy hands one out to Nikki. He takes a grateful sip from his cup. He’s looking expectantly at Doc, who simply shrugged.

“I just got back from the cafeteria…Tommy decided that would be a great place to smoke in the building full of sick people.” He griped. Tommy blushed slightly.

“I wasn’t thinking, alright, I got that! I just…I didn’t want to leave and miss anything.” He admitted, looking down.

Tommy could be real pathetic at times. Nikki could only smile at his downtrodden face. He looked like a kicked puppy, but Nikki knew he was only trying to get sympathy points from Doc. It worked too, their manager could only sigh and pat him on the shoulder.

“Next time…just go outside. We don’t need the hassle of trying to bail you out from the nurses. They’re pretty strict here too, it’s a really good hospital.” Doc replied, looking at Nikki while saying the last part. That was his way of consoling him. Reminding him that Mick was in good hands. Nikki can only nod and sigh. He sits back in his chair, running a hand through his hair.

“You know, if we had taken him seriously yesterday it probably wouldn’t have been as serious as it is now.” He commented. Tommy coughs. Doc looked away. Nikki stares at them, willing them to say something.

“Well it’s true! Hell, if we didn’t do something today he would have been…” he trailed off, not wanting to say the last part out loud. Tommy puts his head in his hands and Doc breathes out a heavy sigh.

“Listen, we got to him when we did and now they’re solving the problem. There’s no what ifs in this situation, we did exactly what we should have. We don’t have time to play the ‘we should have done this we should have done that’ game. All we can do is pray he gets better fast.” He shut down any other attempt at blaming themselves, before grabbing a newspaper from one of the tables and pretending to read it.

Tommy sits down beside Nikki and wraps a spindly arm around his shoulder.

“There’s no reason to blame yourself Sixx. We still got to him in time, which is better than not at all. He’s going to get better and we’ll all laugh about this in the near future.” Tommy tried to comfort him. Nikki could just shrug and nod.

“Better than not at all…yeah, I guess.”

It took another two hours for anything to be said to them. A nurse finally walks up to them, making Nikki jump to his feet and the resulting action forcing Doc to jolt awake. The nurse reassured them that everything was fine, and that the surgery went well. Mick was obviously going to be asleep for a while, so they would have to come back the next day to see him. As the nurse leaves, Nikki finds his anxiety dwindling to just small background noise. He looked towards Doc, who stares at him blankly.

“So…are you going back to California now?” He asked Nikki, who stares at him like he had three eyes on his face.

“Uhhh, no? I’m staying here.”

“And where are you going to stay? We checked out of the hotel like…three hours ago?”

Nikki paused. He hadn’t thought that far…and he had two whole hours to do so. Tommy stood beside them awkwardly. Tommy wasn’t sure if he wanted to stay either. But if he wanted to go, who was going to bring him back to California?

“I’ll stay in a motel close by if I have to, I just don’t want to leave him here by himself. He won’t know what’s going on and I want to be there so he has a familiar face.” Nikki begged.

He didn’t feel comfortable just letting his friend stay somewhere he was unfamiliar with by himself. If it had been him, Nikki would have wanted someone there with him. He’s sure it would have been Tommy, he never went anywhere without his terror twin. Doc could only sigh as he turned to Tommy.

“So what are we going to do with you?” He asked. Tommy shrugged.

“I could try to navigate the airport by myself?” He answered, his answer sounding more like a question with how unsure he was. Doc shook his head.

“I absolutely do not trust any of you to get on a plane by yourselves. Let me get Nikki situated in his stupid motel and then I’ll drive you to the airport and see you off on the plane. Then I’ll come back and take care of Nikki and Mick until they’re ready to come back to California. Does that sound good to everyone?”

Both Nikki and Tommy nodded at this and Doc stood up.

“Good, now let’s go look for some motels around us.”

It didn’t take them long to find the cheapest (but not the dingiest) motel close to the hospital. With Nikki in his room, unpacking for the week ahead, Tommy and Doc shuttled back off to the airport (not without Doc reminding them of how much he did for them and how they shouldn’t take him for granted…Nikki can’t remember everything seeing as though he tuned him out halfway through his speech). Alone, Nikki felt calmer. The atmosphere of the hospital was overwhelming, even though there was practically no one there. He wondered if Mick was comfortable. Was the bed nice enough for his back? Was he laying down flat, or nicely propped up like he always slept.

Then he wondered why he was thinking about the old man so much. He almost never thought about him like this on a daily basis. Was it normal to think about your bandmates? Then again, Nikki wasn’t really thinking about anyone but himself these days. And that only made him feel worse. Maybe he was just selfish for not thinking about them. All his friends, his family…his mom. No, he didn’t have to think about her. But, he never thought about his friends. Not even the guys he helped form the band that had made him a damn near millionaire. He could call them every once in a while…even if it was just to catch up. He never did that though, but then again…neither did they. They used to be close though. They used to call. They used to hang out. Hell, they used to live together.

He paused, throwing the shirt he’d just taken out of his suitcase back onto the bed. He was spiralling, he knew that. He was once again stuck in that old thinking pattern he had tried to drown out with alcohol and drugs. He had no dope on him and he wasn’t even sure where the nearest liquor store was. He couldn’t afford to spiral. He tried calming down his breathing. He took long measured breaths and tried to tune out the brain radio going on in his head.

No, he wasn’t evil for not catching up with his friends. No, he wasn’t evil for not noticing any signs of trouble with Mick. No, he wasn’t evil for not wanting anything to do with his toxic family. He was fine. Mick was fine. Everyone was fine. There was no reason to want to run back to the hospital and hold onto Mick like he could possibly break into a million pieces, because he wasn’t going to. He was fine. There’s no reason to even want to hear his voice, because Mick was asleep and Nikki wasn’t going to try to wake him up when he just got out of an invasive surgery.

Ok. There was something there. Something Nikki was trying to hide from himself. There was no reason he should’ve been feeling fond of that garbage gremlin. Mick was nasty, said weird things and did even weirder stuff. He was stubborn, almost always trying to influence Nikki to go his way instead of just sticking to the script. Sure, he wrote a lot a great riffs, and maybe it was a good thing that he didn’t always listen to Nikki. It was still infuriating at times. They didn’t always get along, and there was a reason they stopped sharing a hotel room since the year before. But…there was something, a weird pervasive feeling there.

All he could do was sleep about it. Maybe there was something there, Nikki was willing to pretend it didn’t exist. Even if he did acknowledge it, nothing was going to come from this. Mick wasn’t like that. He had a girlfriend who he really cared for. One that was probably wondering why he hadn’t come home yet.

The next morning, Nikki woke up extra early. Doc was waiting for him at his door, looking more tired than usual. Nikki gave him a sheepish smile and tried to apologize for the day before. Doc just waved him off.

“I would have had to stay behind either way. I’m not leaving any of you alone for more than ten minutes…that goes for means mr. regular too.”

It doesn’t take long for both Nikki and Doc to get through to Mick’s room. He’s already up and looking rather tired. Nikki’s the first to burst into the room, nearly scaring the hell out of his guitarist.

“Mars, man! How are ya?” Nikki exclaimed, rushing over to uncharacteristically give Mick a hug. Mick was so tired he let Nikki hug him, not even letting out his usual grumble about the overt affection. He just let himself be hugged, wrapping a weak arm around Nikki’s back.

“I’ve seen better days.” Was Mick’s usual sarcastic reply. He nodded at Doc who patted his shoulder lightly. Nikki sat at the edge of the bed, for some reason.

“Dude, we thought you were going to OW-“

Nikki’s interrupted by Doc’s elbow hitting him in the stomach.

“It’s good to see you’re alright Mick, you gave us quite the scare yesterday.” Doc in turn remarked, a much more polite version of Nikki’s crass statement.

“Yeah…I’m sorry about that. I kinda just thought I had food poisoning or something. I don’t even remember the ride here, think I just passed out.”

“Yeah, it was gnarly! You can’t imagine how relieved we are that you made it.” Nikki finally put his two cents in. Mick nodded.

“Tommy and Vince went back to California though, didn’t they?” He asked. Doc grimaced, but nodded.

“But Tommy was there with us when we brought you to the hospital! In fact, he was the one that found you.” Nikki countered. He didn’t want it to seem like they were all heartless. Even still, Vince probably didn’t even know what happened…and most likely wouldn’t care. Nikki tried not to think about that. They couldn’t possibly care that little about each other.

“Yeah…I think I remember that. How’d he get a key to my room either way?”

“We were running late so I gave Tommy a spare key to wake you up…thinking back, I should have known something was wrong. You’re never late.”

Mick shrugged and the room falls silent. They didn’t need to unpack all of that right at that moment. Mick found himself nuzzling up closer to Nikki. He didn’t know why, but he needed the comfort. Of course, when this was over and he went back home, he’ll pretend he never did this. He’ll pretend this never happened, him getting so close to Nikki. He’ll pretend he was strong and didn’t need the comfort. That things like this just happen and he took it in stride. No one needed to know how weak he was being. Nikki didn’t care, of course. He just stroked his hair and let him get as close as possible. He wasn’t even scared to get that close to him, no longer feeling intimidated by the older man. It wasn’t like how it was back in ‘83 anymore. They’re both content to pretend they aren’t doing what they are. Mick wasn’t struggling to stay awake because he was being lulled back to sleep by Nikki’s soft, calming touch. And Nikki sure wasn’t the happiest he’d ever been having full access to Mick without the biting and scratching and screaming. None of them acknowledged it, so it wasn’t happening. Simple as that.

i have more in the can but that’s like a fully fledged fic that I still haven’t worked out yet. but either way, this is what i have take it or leave it. sure, it might seem disjointed and a bit incomprehensible but…oh well.

i was serious though, it happened to my friend ******

[elizakai]

i love the MTTRIO because they are all judgy hypocritical little shits living off of spite and appy juice

[himbohimhoe]

Holding out hope that the writing in veilguard will get more bearable but rook saying to lucanis that it's "not nice that Spite hurt him" and he "shouldn't accept that it’s fine bc it wouldn't be ok if a person did that" like. That is a demon. Built off a single emotion called SPITE. Rook I am finding it really hard to believe that u have lived in thedas for more than 30 seconds.

[hikaruchen]

Commissions!

-

The Process ✨

[torchickentacos]

I'm reading poetry at 1 am and spiraling over like 45 emotions at once, which is how poetry was meant to be enjoyed, I think

[patentedsun]

sorry I'm so MIA but I've been rewatching Malcolm in the middle and a lot of the opinions I've seen online COUGH REDDIT COUGH r quite frankly just bizarre as in, quoting myself, "when The Boys in mitm do something genuinely illegal and terrible and everyone understands it's a sitcom and can giggle but when The Mom is yelling exaggeratedly suddenly this is a Serious Show and she's abusive and narcissistic and should die 🤨"

[the-busy-ghost]

Me normally: Let people love what they love

Me, after a Test Match Special commentator expresses their belief that the new All Creatures Great and Small is somehow "better" than the 1978 version: This is pure insanity and TMS can no longer be trusted on anything, how can they even be trusted to know about cricket, do they have no TASTE

[frostbite-the-bat]

talked w/ a friend about this and wanted to post something similar yesterday after a convo i saw also

about people criticizing ttcc / ttcc fans for just... being cog fans? being cog centric? usually coming from people who only like the toons.

and everyone likes what they like! it's okay! but saying that people who like the cogs are horrible and support the bad things they do, is just blatantly wrong. i thought we knew that enjoying villainous and morally Bad / grey characters is... okay? it doesn't mean you support what they do. it's interesting to explore these topics.

i've seen many people just... paint anyone who likes the cogs as horrible because they're "apologists of x and y" and... i dunno. rubs me the wrong way! you do have a point and recognize the cogs do bad things, but liking them as characters means nothing about who you are as a person.

and this is not to say that people who are in toontown for the toons are bad. hell! they are right this IS toontown. i may be on the cog liker side but i like the toons! maybe ocs more than the npcs - mostly because i like my friends and the sheer creativity the toons can bring out!!

SO what i wanna say... i dunno. let's not point fingers...? let's have fun in a goofy cartoon game together??? also complaining about people liking VILLAIN ROBOTS on TUMBLR is kind of funny to me. do you realize where you are. but then again a lot of this i see on discord and in-game as well since i avoid things on tumblr... i am a sensitive little fella i avoid misty fight bc of One Really mean "Critic" guy i saw there and i have been shivering in my bootsies since. so you get me

but like yes ttcc is more cog centric but... that's okay? things could be written better and i still wanna speak on it, and i do thing the toons deserve attention and better writing... but the fact it focuses on the cogs isn't... bad? if you don't like how con centric it is you can go play ttr...? god forbid people have fun and explore the villain's side of things...? i'm not saying either toontown server is better or worse than the other... and everyone can like their own things!!

but like... people will just like the cogs and that's okay and it doesn't make you bad. let's all be friends okay? both sides may be going at each other's necks in-game and the cogs in fact do horrible things - but it's what makes them fun, and it gives the toons things to do in the game!! but we don't gotta !!!!!!!! i may be really sarcastic and sometimes mean in private but like that's me just privately sassing, deep down i think people should just... y'know..? enjoy things.

so yea that's the guzma / cathal thought of today. toon people cog people both people are all awesome as fuck and you keep doing what you're doing i love you toontown isn't toontown without you

[vriska]

sometimes you know I'm of the opinion that it can be really healthy to seek out and listen to folks who's opinions contradict some of yours, like for instance theres this one youtuber I would sometimes listen to their videos because it was presented entertainingly even if I disagreed with a majority of their takes, but it really feels like they've taken a nose dive into their own ass and their opinions have shifted ever more extreme into their lil bubble world that i cant even watch their stuff anymore, its like... if you are so unwilling to go outside your comfort zone, to engage critically and in good faith with media that may not be to your specific tastes, you really shouldn't even be critiquing media anymore, you're living in an echo chamber and spouting the right buzzwords to win points that don't exist and i hate that that has been the growing trend of fandom as a whole

biases can exist and they have their place in commentary but also when you're turning that bias to pure vitriol against anything deemed "problematic" (as loose as that term gets thrown about) you just shut yourself off from new experiences and opportunities to grow and learn. art in all its forms exists to engage us, and there are more feelings out there than just the 'good' ones

[todayisafridaynight]

dont touch me im thinking of arakawa and sawashiro co-parenting again