#oh wow i wish id never seen this before
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jkgnggj · 7 months ago
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This is Skibidi Saiki
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And saikis always calling Tori shitty smh 🙄
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cosyvelvetorchid · 2 months ago
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☃️🦷💍 id love to see how you combine these
Your wish is my command!
Enjoy!
🩶
**********
They stamped the snow from their feet before stepping into the cabin and dropping their bags. It was a small, simple cabin—open plan living area and kitchen, and a bedroom at the back with an en suite bathroom. There was a huge sectional in front of the fireplace—this is what drew them to this particular cabin because it was big enough for them both to fit on it—and a big TV in the corner.
“I can’t believe we’re actually on vacation.” Buck excitedly said. “A whole weekend in a cabin with no work, no fires, no medical emergencies.. just me and you.”
Tommy slid his arms around Bucks waist and kissed him chastely. “What do you want to do first?”
“First I’d like to eat because I’m starving. Why don’t you take the bags into the bedroom and I’ll get started on dinner.”
“Yes boss.” Tommy teased with a wink.
After finishing eating dinner and washing up, they settled on the sofa to watch a movie. Buck had insisted that as Tommy had flown them there, he got first pick and he chose The Terminator. Mostly because he knew Buck liked it.
By half way through the movie Buck had already fallen asleep on Tommy’s chest. Tommy draped a blanket over them both and carried on watching the movie, snacking on popcorn.
He threw another few pieces into his mouth and immediately screamed out in pain, jolting his body and almost sending Buck flying off the sofa.
“What?! What is it?!” Buck jumped up looking around trying to figure out what was going on. Quickly he noticed Tommy bent forward with his hand holding his cheek.
“Babe? What’s wrong?”
“It’s.. ah! My.. my tooth, I.. broke it..ah!” He was in an immense amount of pain and to be honest Buck was a little scared. He’d never seen Tommy like this before. He’d always been so calm and squared away.
“It’s okay, it’s okay. Uh, hold on..” he rushed to the kitchen and threw some ice into a ziplock bag and wrapped it in a dish towel.
He lifted it towards Tommy’s face and he flinched away. “It’s okay, Tommy. It’s just some ice. It’ll help.” Tommy took the ice and put it on his face. He hissed at the feel of it. He was heavy breathing and couldn’t sit still—too much adrenaline from the pain.
Thankfully they’d managed to find an emergency dentist a few miles away and a quick uber call later they were walking inside.
Tommy had broken in half one of his molars on a popcorn kernel, exposing the nerve. The dentist—whom Buck was convinced was 130 years old—said he could fill the hole and give him a temporary cap until Tommy could get to his usual dentist.
An hour later, he was (temporarily) fixed, and high as a kite on pain meds, but ready to go back to their cabin. Buck helped walk him in to the cabin and lowered him onto the sofa.
“Wow do I live here?” He asked; his words sluggish.
Buck laughed. “Uh, no, babe we’re on vacation.”
Tommy stared at Buck with heavy eyes. “My boyfriend is not gonna like that. He a firefighter.”
“I’m your boyfriend, babe.” Buck reminded him, putting a blanket over him.
“No!” Tommy protested. “My boyfriend is really pretty.”
Buck laughed again and debated whether to take his phone it and record this. “He is, huh?”
Tommy nodded emphatically. “The prettiest. He has an adorable birthmark on his face and really soft hair.”
“He does sound pretty.” Buck played along.
“His tummy is my favourite though. Oh wow! His looks like yours! I just want to go BOOP-“ he poked Buck lower stomach with his finger “all the time.” He smiled happily. “I like to rest my head on it sometimes. It’s like a warm pillow.”
Buck couldn’t hold in the laugh this time. Tommy was just to freaking adorable high.
“Hey, hey!” Tommy whispered, gestured with his hand for Buck to come closer. “Can I tell you secret?”
“Sure.”
“I’m going to propose to him this weekend.” He whispered.
Bucks heart damn near stopped.
“You-you are?” He asked, trying to hide the shake to his voice. Tommy nodded emphatically again.
“Yep. I have a ring and everything.” He leaned to the side to lie on the sofa.
“You do, huh?” Buck gently lifted Tommy’s head to place a pillow underneath.
“I got his sister to help me pick it out. She’s really pretty too. But I don’t want to marry her. I want to marry my Evan.” His eyes were getting heavier.
My Evan.
Buck had to use all of his energy not to cry right there at hearing Tommy call him that. It was such a simple thing but it reminded him that he belonged to someone.
“I’m kinda scared though.” Tommy said.
“Of what?”
“He might say no. I don’t want him to say no. I want him to say yes.” He had the most adorable pouty facial expression and Buck had to work hard to resist kissing it off him.
“I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about.” He told Tommy.
“How do you know?”
Buck sat on the edge of the couch and ran a gentle hand through Tommy’s hair, smiling as Tommy hummed in contentment.
“I have a feeling he’s going to say yes.” He whispered, leaning down to kiss Tommy’s forehead as sleep took him.
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moltengoldveins · 8 months ago
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That TCU post…that is truly one of, if not the greatest thing I’ve ever seen come out of this fandom. I tried my own hand a while back at writing “the dsmp but taken seriously”; gave it a name and a playlist but didn’t really write much before I went back to my other projects. If you ever have the motivation to do more with that outline I’d be honored to be a co-writer or help out in any way, or if you want you could just use my title as a name for the series: A Ballad of Broken Dreams.
holy crap op this is so sweet. Thank you so much. I’m… wow ok. That. Wow. Thank you. That’s legitimately so kind and I’m so glad you enjoyed it XD. Id also Love to see your playlist and your thoughts behind the songs if you’re down?! That sounds awesome :D
funnily enough, I’ve had a drafted outline for this heccin thing running around in my head since the Butcher Army arc. Right around when SAD-ist dropped her animatic, I simultaneously realized ‘oh wow, I Adore this concept’ and ‘oh wow, I Highly doubt the CCs are gonna manage to do this the way I’d want to see it’ and lo and behold: I was correct. So painfully correct. (There were also People Involved whom I had Really Bad Feelings About from very early on that, sure enough, turned out to be exactly what i thought they were, rip) So the Emduo prequels, Icarus heccin Dying, and the end of Axe of Peace have been around for Ages.
I’d honestly love to do more with this concept, (i am designing movie posters as we speak) but due to Chronic Illness Pog I’m in a rather unstable financial situation? And don’t have a ton of free time for art. Any big projects are gonna take a While, or id need to find a way to use it or something adjacent to fund, y’know, Rent. That being said, I’m definitely writing the emduo prequels, both as movie scripts and as novels, as those are the films focused on, yknow, My Bois. I also think it’d be hilarious to release the novels and then the scripts and watch people Loose Their Minds over the ‘inaccurate adaptation >>:(‘
I’d absolutely love to work with other people in the fandom on this stuff, though I’ve never been the best at directly co-writing (my writing method and style is painfully specific (ie needlessly poetic) and I’m very autistic: I don’t like it when people touch that Specific Thing) but literally anything else? Im open ears. I love collabs.
and finally, I adore your name for the series, (excellent word choice there /srs, it fits perfectly with the symbolism of the whole story) and I think it works really Really well for the actual DSMP, but if I’m entirely honest… I’m not sure it fits the TCU? Like genuinely I’m so grateful for the suggestion, I love when people offer ideas and bounce things around like that. But one of the main things I tried to do with this concept was work out how the story could actually end Well. A deep-seated belief in the good-but-fallen nature of man, the importance of hope, and the inevitability of redemption kinda comes part and parcel with the whole Being-A-Christian Thing (if it doesn’t, you’re missing the Whole Point Of The Bible) and while the actual DSMP may have ended in broken dreams… this doesn’t. That was my first thought when writing that outline: This Is Going To End Well. Not for wish-fulfillment reasons, not because I’m naive or I don’t like bad endings, but because fundamentally, everything sad is a lie, and if the story has ended in tragedy, it hasn’t ended yet.
If I had to pick a series name now, I’m not sure what I’d pick. A part of me balks at referencing anything popularized by Our Local Redacted, but ‘unfinished symphony’ wasn’t his in the first place, it was from Hamilton. “The Finished Symphony” has a cool ring to it? I dunno. If anyone else has ideas please feel free to toss them in here aight, I’m not settling on anything for a While.
Anyways, thanks for Ted talking with me, drink water 💜
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alpona · 2 years ago
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Geats episode 11 liveblog:
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- Tsumuri doing the recap again.
Ace's play pretend is getting so annoying ahaha...
- wah, game master directly addresed Ace's ulterior motive with this wish!
- Woah!! Ace's current wish is to BE DGP staff?!!  Yayy! Going step by step, full on with the 'investigate DGP to it's core' , go Ace-kun!
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- yes, you and I both Ace-kun, DGP mystery is very interesting!
- yep Tsumuri knows about punkjack. But she's more likely unaware of DGP's darker side, or got her memory erased.
- Time to admit, I usually start skipping the opening after few episodes, but I wasn't able to do so in Geats yet. Congrats!
- Hello again Keiwa-kun! Ah, depressed Keiwa is so real it hurts...
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- wow, it's as if the phrase 'wish the ground could swallow me up' became literally true 😂
- long story? Yes we're here to listen to Neon's father's backstory.
- oh hello bodyguards-san!
- important question time! Yes, why couldn't you, Ace-kun?
- Neon understands Ace's personality so well, *cries in human emotions*
- 😯 woaaahh!! The desire card can just glitch and literally reject a wish!! A seemingly simpler wish like finding someone...
Huhuhu the bigger mystery with Ace's mother intensifies!
- Maybe she won and made a wish not to be found, or she's the real villain this season muhuhaha! (Typical rider parent issues)
- oho, very main character like determination you're showing Ace-kun 😌
- through the rabbit hole! This scene is funny! And enjoy Ace-kun falling in style
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- oh now we have alternate dimensions too? Alright cool, sure *more theories*
The place is beautiful btw.
- this is how Keiwa meets the others... So he's gonna accidentally touch a core ID and remember everything very soon I guess.
- Ace immediately teaming up with someone his age. Yes. I just called him a (2000 year old) child. Yes I did. 🙂😂
- Jamato riders! Yes I've seen the scans before, not gonna act surprised. From some pics though, I actually thought Keiwa was going to become a Jamato rider, hehe😄.
Their buckle design is pretty by the way.
- Metal Thunder is very useful. Really liking the beat buckle.
- Jamato riders are quite scary.
- unapproved things??! HUH! So you're admitting to be the evil behind these games openly now, Game master?
- 🤯 whoa... The... wa..i.... What did we just see!
Breaking news!!! DGP harvests Jamato thingies in a greenhouse!!! Wahahaha! Muhuhahaha!! (Ok why is it ME who's laughing like the villain?! Why am I so excited with this reveal 🤣)
What's this, mini hellheim from Gaim?
- we could all tell DGP being responsible, but I would've never thought of everything growing on trees lol
- And core IDs are like.. wait those are the broken IDs.. so those are the... seeds? Then jamatos are born from those? so jamatos indeed, in a way, ARE the dead players? oooo no....
- And we have a mad scientist who isn't following the boss's orders propertly.
- this now fits with the Jamatos plant like designs, and the growth/evolve aspect too. makes sense.
- so everything's very natural and organic yay 🥴
- Neon And Ace deciding to investigate kurama papa.
It's really nice how characters are directly talking to each other to solve things here!
- Whaaa, so people even lose the desire they wrote down of the lose!! I totally didn't see this coming. And I thought Keiwa was just in his depressed stage. Me trying to be understanding when there was no need, ok, back to being ruthless.
- It's grandpa's time to die.. I mean shine... Well, obviously to dieee...
- fever buckle. so fever buckle can double the power of each buckle, so fever boost is also boost boost, or boostX2 or double boost... ( What nonsense am I even saying?)
- it's like Boost saying 'get yourself together!' to Keiwa-kun lol. Let's not forget the real protagonists haha
- granpa survived this episode! Wah! He's a nice guy.
Very interesting episode. Next week, looks like Tycoon will be back!
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m1ckeyb3rry · 3 months ago
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DHSHSH sorry if it seems like I’m blowing up your inbox I fr just have shit memory…the way that I forget to add my anti-forgetting measure smh…I always end up leaving my notes open and then when I go back to use it to jot down something else it’s left on what I last wrote and I saw the ask and was like “wait a minute….” LMAO but omg the Mira rizz at it again…I’m glad you’re okay though??? That sounds really crazy LMAO DHSJSH bfb Karasu would’ve come in clutch but hope you’re feeling better now!! Manifesting some better party moments for you….bfb Karasu moment soon….
I’m not that into it either but I remember my feed being FLOODED at some point and all I could think was “god these guys have such atrocious haircuts…!!”
Omg wait snuffy getting aiku a girl…knowing snuffy I can imagine her being almost aikus opposite in terms of dating scene personality (?? I wish I could describe this better) and aikus like haha no way I’d ever actually like her…and then he gets the “oh shit” moment LMAO
SHDHSJS OHHHHH ok thank you for telling me I’ve only ever seen it used within goat LOL some abbreviations/acronyms also just fly over my head…I remember when I first saw you use “icl” I had to look it up LMAOOO but agreed though!!! HAHA RIN STEALING THE IDEA so real…Karasu and Otoya pull up to a reunion/friend meetup and see Hiori looking at a house blueprint and ask why he needs another house and he’s like “I’m trying to profess my undying love”
No because him being in all the nerdy classes is so real…him not realizing his own potential reminds me of the part in the egoist bible where he got confessed to with whiskey bon bons and he can’t tell if it was a prank or not (I wanna know more about that story too omg)
FR id never really thought about aiku period before your idea like…he was kinda just there playing a role in Ubers and the u20 match but tbh i didn’t really pay much attention to him before LOL
- Karasu anon
HAHA NO IT’S OKAY i love when my inbox is full it makes me feel very acknowledged 🤩 so never fear it’s like impossible for me to get annoyed by stuff like that…HAHA mira rizz back at it again but unintentional as always 😓 no fr it was lowkey scary looking back 😳 like in the moment we were way too drunk to be anything but like vaguely confused about why this guy had like flipped a switch and started threatening to call the cops on us (??) but in hindsight we’re probably lucky it didn’t escalate further 😭 it was so stupid too because he was genuinely mad at nothing but yeah what can you do 😫 no because i went to sleep in my makeup too and i woke up the next day like “wow karasu would NEVER let that slide” LMAOAO luckily i am much improved and will try to make up for my lack of writing now 😵 tbh it will probably take a lot for my friends to convince me to go out w them again i honestly don’t enjoy it THAT much i just feel bad always saying no yk plus then i get lowkey emo sitting at home while everyone is out and about
LMAOO no i agree they def have some interesting hairdos in bsd JFKSKS somebody tell kaiser and ness to pack it up and move fandoms 😭 their calling is clearly in whatever is going on in bsd…tbh i have no idea what the plot is because every time someone posts abt it it’s completely different but i’m sure kaiser will find his niche and thrive 💖
NO LITERALLY like snuffy introduces aiku to this quiet girl who’s never had a bf because she’s focusing on herself and wants to wait for “the right person” and aiku is like “LMAOOO LOSER ALERT 😂” and then one day he’s lying in bed about to fall asleep and he’s like “oh shit 😰”…calls an emergency conference with barou lorenzo aryu and sendou (the dream team) and is all “guys what do i do i feel all nervous around her and i don’t think other girls are hot anymore and i think about her before bed and and and—” and barou’s just like “you fucking donkey you have a crush on her 😒😐” HAHAH cue like a month of confused pining on aiku’s part meanwhile the dream team is just like done w his bullshit and snuffy is secretly cackling because it’s all going according to plan…meanwhile the reader is only dating aiku as a favor to snuffy so she doesn’t gaf but slowly he starts winning her over 🤔⁉️ maybe this will be the final entry in oliver aiku’s guide to getting girls like now HE’S the one getting the girl ykwim and there’s just random advice from various blue lockers thrown in there every now and again that mirrors how he helped them in their own universe (like he facetimes sae at one point and sae is like “STFU bro you’re in love w her” and hangs up w zero explanation or he meets up w tabieita and otoya is like “yo if you want to keep her maybe you should try to match her energy” HAHAHA) honestly i’m seeing the vision…i don’t even care about aiku like that he truly was a background character to me but it would be such a good way to wrap up the series even though all of the chapters take place in different universes (the OAEU — oliver aiku extended universe)
i am an abbreviation warrior but if you ever need me to explain one then lmk 😫 i find all of mine on tik tok/by being chronically online but there’s def a lot of times when i need urban dictionary assistance in explaining what i’m looking at LMAO 😭 and YESSSS hiori has like architectural plans laid out in front of him which makes tabieita be like WTF…and technically white butterfly could take place in the cherry tree/seabird universe so theoretically rin and hiori could’ve plotted together on how to “most efficiently” pine for their respective girls 😰 can you imagine like “okay i’m going to hang out on her university campus for an entire week until i see her again” “that COOKS bro i’m going to build her dream house in our hometown and hope she hears about it and comes to visit” “fire idea man 🔥”
omg yeahhh didn’t he get like six diff valentines that were just whiskey bonbons?? lowkey i would consider that a prank too especially as a teenage boy 😭 it’s like confusing to me which characters are and aren’t good looking in canon…like isagi pulled zero bitches pre-bllk and same with bachira and nagi BUT according to nagi’s ln girls do think he’s cute/attractive he’s just REALLY fucking weird so they stay away?? so whenever people are like “nagi’s canonically ugly” i’m like nooo he’s good looking just a freak 💔 and then i think rin is supposed to have gotten a lot of valentines but he rejected all of them…and fucking RAICHI got like 10 valentines ⁉️ wdym raichi got more than KARASU 🤔
100% aiku was just there to show up say random bullshit and then leave 😭 but he may have just made his mark on the miraverse LFGNDKSK honestly top ten greatest comebacks of all time if i end up writing the series
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dollslayer · 3 years ago
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By Its Cover
Dark!Librarian!Steve Rogers x Shy!Reader, College AU
Summary: Your late nights at the university library spark a chain of events. Will they lead to your undoing? To anyone else's?
W/C: 8,890 (oops, sorry)
Warnings: DARK themes, NO MINORS, stalking, murder, minor character death, smut, angst, unprotected sex, oral sex, alcohol consumption, swearing
A/N: FINALLY, I wrote this for @darkficsyouneveraskedfor's 2 Years of Darkness challenge! This fic kicked my ass but after some months I'm so excited about it! This is my first truly dark fic so please don't read if any of these topics upset you but I do want to make a note that the sex is consensual. If I missed any warnings please DM me immediately and I will add them. Reblog/comment if you liked it! Maybe even check out some of my other fics 👀 Cheers!
Main Masterlist
You stumbled slightly on the uneven pavement as you made the final steps towards the graduate school library. It was always so much quieter than the undergrad library and at this hour there’d be a good chance it was just you and the poor person stuck working the overnight help desk. You didn’t mind that though, you were never an overly sociable person and you preferred to work alone anyways.
You swiped your student ID through the sensor and the little green light granted you entry as you opened the door. Looking around there wasn’t even someone at the desk, just the sound of the always-on A/C rattling the leaves of the fake plants in the lobby.
You moved to put your ID away when it slipped from your fingers and plapped onto the floor, your own face staring back up to you from the plastic. You sighed and swung your bag further back over your shoulder as you bent to pick it up when a pair of legs edged their way into your vision. Caught off guard by the man attached to them, you watched him bend to pick up the piece of plastic.
You both straightened back up to your full heights and you found yourself looking up at him. He had clear blue eyes and sandy blond hair that was swept back. He looked like he could be a model, he was so handsome and you felt like a deer in headlights.
You realized that he had your ID in his hand and was waiting patiently for you to take it. You smiled awkwardly and took it from him. He looked back to your card and read your name out loud and snapped you out of your thoughts.
“Thank you” you said more in surprise than gratitude “Sorry, I just, I could’ve sworn no one was here you came out of nowhere” You laughed nervously, hoping to hide your embarrassment. You were never good with talking to people and once a situation got awkward you just got yourself deeper in it.
“I was just coming around the corner when I noticed you dropped your ID. I actually work the late shift at the desk. Serves me right for applying last minute for work through the university, right?” He asked with a small laugh.
“Late night cram session? You look like your back’s about to snap from holding all those books” He pointed to your bag, the stitches of it’s straps were frayed and had been sewn over a couple of times.
“Yeah, I like coming here late, hardly anyone’s here, I don’t have to deal with people and I can just focus” You explained
“Right, well, sorry to keep you. If you need anything I’m Steve, and I’ll be bored out of my mind at the desk” he smirked and walked back towards reception.
You turned down the hall and thought how strange it was that you’d never seen him here before. It was the middle of the semester so he couldn’t have just started but you were in here all the time and you’d never run into him once. You brushed the thought off and continued on your way.
____
Over the next few weeks you and Steve developed a routine. You’d come in around 10 or 11, you’d stop at the desk and chat a bit and then you’d head up to your spot on the second floor to study. Occasionally Steve would see you when he returned books and you’d joke around a bit before he’d leave you to your work. You were building a good rapport with each other and he was pleased.
Sometimes he’d been too shy to approach you. It made him feel like the scrawny, helpless kid he was before the growth spurt. Beautiful girls like you never looked twice at him but he knows that you’re different, he knows that if you had met him then that you’d never treat him like those girls did. He knows that in time you two could really have something special.
Steve understood that building a relationship with you would take time and balance. He didn’t want to seem too eager but ever since he saw you he knew he’d do anything to just talk to you.
It started some months ago when he was visiting Bucky on campus. They had been hanging out in the quad right by a group of buildings when you tripped on the pavement and your books fell at his feet. He helped you up and even collected your books for you but you were too flustered and embarrassed to meet his eye. You eked out a thank you and scurried into the graduate library.
That moment sparked a blooming obsession within him. The following night he was still in town but he went out without Bucky and staked out where he’d been the previous night and watched you go to the library at the same time you had. The next two nights he did this and quickly pieced together your nightly routine.
Within a month's time he was set to transfer for the next semester and when he did he got a job working night shifts at the library. Bucky had asked him why on Earth he’d want that and Steve had shrugged him off, claiming that he wanted to be paid and didn’t want to deal with anyone. Seemed like a good enough reason to anyone else.
And so that’s how Steve found himself invading your personal space to hand you your ID. He enjoyed the way you trembled slightly in surprise. You looked so small next to him, looking up at him. He nearly forgot what he was going to say, feeling suddenly shy himself. You were so close to him and you were just as beautiful as he remembered.
Take it slow, he reminded himself.
____
Your apartment door slammed behind you as you stormed out of the building. You left in only what you were wearing which was a light hoodie and some leggings. You had thought to grab your book bag before you left and it kept knocking into your side with each angry step you took. Tears streaked your face but you tried your best to brush them off and continued on your brisk walk to the library.
You and your boyfriend had gotten into a fight and things got heated pretty fast, they always did with Sean. You had confronted Sean about being gone so often and so late, you’d missed him and wanted to spend time with you. That’s when he started getting defensive and turning your late nights at the library right around on you.
Things escalated to shouting and Sean had gotten so angry that he’d knocked over a pile of your books from the table. It had scared you and that’s when you left. You knew that you’d be getting nowhere with him when he was so angry. You wanted to be alone and needed a distraction so you grabbed your bag and headed for the library.
You secretly hoped Steve was working, it’d be nice to see a friendly face. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t have the tiniest crush on him. He’s handsome and funny and kind and he always knows when to give you space. You wish you’d met him at a different point in your life, you could really see yourself with him in another timeline. Maybe it was just easier to think that having just had a fight with Sean.
You swiped your card and waited patiently for the door to open. You could tell Steve had already spotted you and was looking at you as you passed through the glass doors. He was smiling his same boyish charm smile that made you feel even shier than you already were. You must’ve looked a mess but it was comforting to see him there waiting for you.
“There she is,” Steve said with a smile as he got up from his chair to greet you. His face immediately fell though as he took in the tracks of your tears and your puffy eyes.
“What’s wrong?” Steve looked upset and angry for you. You were touched, but you’d rather leave it.
“I’d rather not talk about it, if it’s okay. It’s nice to see you though, Steve. How’s your night?”
Steve’s jaw ticked but he swallowed and nodded and you were grateful he didn’t push it further.
“Uneventful as usual, it’s good to see you too, doll.”
You felt your cheeks heat at the nickname. If you were on better terms with Sean you’d feel bad but you couldn’t find it in yourself to do anything but giggle.
You said your goodbye to Steve and made your way to the second floor to study.
Hours passed and you had your nose buried in a book when you felt a sudden presence. You looked up slowly behind you and shrieked when you found Steve just inches from you. He held his hands out defensively and tried to catch your breathing.
“Steve, oh my God, I didn’t see you there, you scared me!” You laughed as you caught your breath.
“Yeah, sorry, I uh, have a habit of doing that.” He said as he ducked his head sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. Was he blushing? Why did he look nervous?
“I, um. I was uh, I was hoping to maybe ah, ask you something, actually.” Steve swallowed thickly. He is nervous. You smiled at him and motioned for him to go on.
“I was thinking… maybe, when you’re free if um, would you maybe want to go to dinner? With me?” He stammered out.
You smiled and felt heat flood your cheeks all over again, Steve was gorgeous and you were flattered that someone like him would want to go out with you. Just as quickly as that flattery came dread had instantly replaced it. You had a boyfriend, you couldn’t do that to Sean. Oh God, now I have to turn him down. What if he hates me?
“Wow… I uh, Steve,” you started, “I’m. You’re so sweet, I don’t know what to say. But, I have a boyfriend, I’m really sorry”
“But- but don’t think I wouldn’t say yes, if I could. You’re such a nice guy and I’m really happy for our friendship. I hope this doesn’t make things weird between us, I’m. I’m sorry,” You quickly led up with. You felt so awkward and bad that you had to turn him down.
Steve’s jaw ticked and he looked away. A blush of embarrassment had made its way up his neck and into his cheeks. His fists clenched at his sides and he took a deep breath.
“It’s… It’s fine, I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I don’t want things to be weird between us either. You know what? Why don’t we just forget the whole thing? Sorry again.” He finished with a tight lipped smile
You sent an uneasy smile back and nodded.
“Of course, no damage done, Steve.”
With that he left you and you went back to your book. You tried not to overthink the entire situation but couldn’t help but feel slightly uncomfortable.
____
“Boyfriend” the word echoed in his head on a never ending loop with deafening reverb. He nodded curtly at you and smiled. You had your awkward exchange of apologies and excuses. Wordlessly, he made his way back to the information desk. He felt angry but also humiliated, he had spent at least a week building himself up to say something to you and you just turned him down so wholly?
He saw the way you looked at him, the way you laughed at his jokes. Steve knew that he meant more to you than you were letting on. There was attraction there, you were just in denial because you had a boyfriend.
Who even was this schmuck? You couldn’t have liked him that much because if you did then you would’ve mentioned him before but you hadn’t. If you really loved your boyfriend then you wouldn’t have smiled at Steve the way you did or stopped to say hello every night. He needed to see for himself whom exactly it was that was so undeserving of your attention.
Steve checked the cameras and saw that you were packing up your things. He had maybe a few minutes to gather his own things and wait for you. There was someone else coming to cover the library in 20 minutes, it would be fine if he left it alone until then. He decided to make himself scarce from the desk so you wouldn’t have to see him again before you left and you wouldn’t notice he’d be following you.
Waiting for the sound of the double doors to click shut he turned the corner and waited for just a minute. He slunk down the mainways of campus towards the student apartments and stopped just 20 yards away from you up against a wall. You looked so cold all alone in the dark as you buzzed in one of the numbers.
“1B, what the fuck could you possibly want at this hour?” a gruff voice answered over the comm.
“Baby, it’s me, sorry I forgot my keys but you weren’t responding to my texts so” You trailed off as you shivered in the night. No reply came, just the buzzer sounding off. You hurried inside and Steve tried his best to scope out external windows.
Finally the light came on in one of them and to his luck the blinds were mostly open. Through the vertical slats he could make out your entrance and an impeding figure from the hall. It was him, the boyfriend. The guy that was apparently so much better than Steve.
He saw your body language was tense and you opened your mouth to speak but before you could get a word in, your boyfriend was grabbing your face in his hands and kissing you. You looked surprised maybe, but you just let him grab you like that. You just fucking let him.
He watched from his spot against a pillar from the building across the walkway. He clenched his jaw and tried to control his breathing watching this guy, this boy manhandle you like you weren’t something special, something precious. He was disgusted but he couldn’t look away as your clothes were shirked off and you two fucked right there on the couch.
He couldn’t bring himself to watch anymore and stormed off. As he walked back to his place a plan began to form in the back of his mind.
____
Things with Sean were smoothed over. You didn’t really talk, so much as he just fucked you before you could even talk about it. He had kissed you on the cheek after and said he was sorry. So you figured that he was. You didn’t really feel like pushing it anyways.
You made for the library once again, anticipating a long night ahead of you with midterms around the corner.
You let out a shriek as you realized someone was standing over you. Steve was hovering right above you, looking even taller than he already was. You pushed your chair back to get some distance between yourself and him while you caught your breath from the momentary scare.
“Steve, I uh, sorry I didn’t hear you coming, again.”
He leaned himself against the edge of the table and crossed his arms. How had you not realized he was so muscular before? You flushed and scolded yourself for thinking about him like that. You had a boyfriend and Steve was just the nice guy at the library.
He ducked his head shyly and waved your apology off.
“Sorry, guess I’m just sneaky.” He chuckled in amusement but the feeling wasn’t mutual, “I was just up here returning some books when I realized I missed you coming in, thought I’d come say hi.”
“Right,” you replied, “Guess we just missed each other. How’s the desk tonight?”
“Bored to tears as usual, just glad you’re here tonight”
Steve winked at you and you felt your cheeks get hot again and you looked away with a small laugh.
“You always know just what to say, don’t you?”
“Ah that’s not true.” He paused, “I get nervous all the time around pretty girls like you”
You were really in it now. Your cheeks heated instantly and you had to look away from him again. For someone that just got rejected he doesn’t stay down for long. How the hell were you going to talk your way out of this one? He knows you have a boyfriend, why would he say that?
“Anyway, I’ll leave you to it.” Oh, thank God.
He begins to walk back to his cart before spinning on his heel one last time.
“Hey, I forgot to ask. You’re pretty good with art history, right?”
You nod cautiously, afraid that you know where this is going.
“Well, as of right now I’ve got a C. I was wondering if you’d be willing to meet on one of my nights off here and help me out?”
“O-oh. Yeah, of course. No problem. I’m sure Sean wouldn’t mind.”
You were too nice for your own good, saying yes before really thinking it all through. You only realized you had after the words left your mouth so you mentioned Sean to save yourself a bit.
Steve’s eyes crinkled in the corners as he smiled at you.
“Awesome, you’re the best. Maybe we can get together at that cafe on 3rd next Tuesday around noon?”
“Of course, I’ll be there” You confirm.
____
Tuesday couldn’t come soon enough for Steve. He didn’t need any help in art history, he was averaging about an 87, actually. But when you turned him down he knew he had to find another way to get closer to you and he knew that you’d say yes out of pressure.
All in all things were going pretty well for Steve. Despite your shy nature he’d managed to get closer to you much quicker than he expected. He loved watching you get flustered whenever he was close, finding it hard not to get flustered himself. He was impatient for things to move forward but he knew it would all pan out. There was only one wrench in the plan; your boyfriend Sean.
The other night when Steve had followed you home and witnessed Sean manhandle you in your apartment he began thinking of how to remove him from the picture. Steve did his research on Sean and found it suspicious he couldn’t find anything on him. Usually after a little digging you can find something off about anyone, but not him. Steve knew it would take a little more effort, but for you he’d make it.
So that’s how Steve wound up spending his night off in the corner of the dive bar that was just off campus. Off campus enough that you’d need to drive there. He had tailed Sean’s Jeep there after his club soccer game in hopes of finding something he could actually use to justify getting rid of him for you. He groused as he pulled into the parking garage across the street and pocketed his parking stub. He waited a few beats and watched Sean leave his car.
He slinked in the door and grabbed a dimly lit corner booth. The residue of whatever cleaner this place used was causing his forearms to stick to the table at his booth and the air stunk of vape smoke. He was surrounded by other 20-somethings, awkward Tinder hookups and frat bros meeting up to blow off steam.
On the opposite side of the room he spotted Sean, watched him as he approached the bar for another pint. He’d followed him here in hopes of getting some sort of information on him that he could use. After an hour of nursing one beer and absolutely nothing happening with Sean Steve had been ready to give up.
Just as he was getting ready to down the rest of his drink the door had opened and in walked a girl around his age. She looked nervous but excited as she looked around the place. She nearly squealed as she rushed over when she found who she was looking for. A smile slowly crawled across Steve’s face as the girl rushed into Sean’s arms and embraced him with a kiss. This is exactly what Steve needed to get him out of the picture.
Steve discreetly took out his phone and snapped a few photos, even got a video of them kissing again. He figured this would be enough to blackmail Sean into leaving you. Getting what he needed, he grabbed his jacket and left the bar. He felt light as a feather walking home, his plan was finally setting into motion and it wouldn’t be long until you were together.
Tuesday had finally come and Steve’s good mood only carried over. He practically skipped to the coffee shop you two had agreed to meet at. He grabbed a table and waited for you. When he saw you open the door he was grinning ear to ear but his expression quickly changed taking in your appearance. You looked exhausted, like you’d been crying again. This wouldn’t do.
“What’s wrong? Is it your boyfriend again?” Steve asked.
You nodded silently and set down your bag with a huff.
“He’s just been out really late lately, I feel like he’s never home. Then again I’m always out late.”
“Well I’m glad you’re a night owl, otherwise we wouldn’t have met” Steve tried to turn the conversation back to them and to keep it positive.
“I guess you’re right. You didn’t order anything?” You frowned, noticing his empty hands.
“I was waiting for you, it’s my treat.” You opened your mouth to protest but Steve was quick to add, “Don’t even try to argue with me on this one.”
You sighed but ultimately relented, following him to the counter. He let you order first.
“Um, just a small hot chocolate please, thank you so much”
Steve thought it was cute that you didn’t drink caffeine, he knew hot chocolate was your drink of choice. He knew this of course from hours of pouring over every profile of yours he could find on the internet. He even found your tumblr you were just sure nobody knew about. Turns out you’ve got quite the dirty mind. But that was a thought for another day. Steve turned back to the counter and ordered black coffee and paid the bill.
With drinks in hand you made your way back to your table and settled in for an afternoon of art history. It went smoothly overall and Steve even got you to laugh a few times. He’d perfectly played his balance of pretending not to know about the subject while seeming to be learning what you were teaching. He could tell you felt proud of yourself for accomplishing something and he was happy he could make you feel that way. He was sure he was the only one that could.
You called it a day and said your goodbyes, you went in for an awkward hug which Steve accepted wholeheartedly. He’d even managed to finally snag your number so you two could work out more study times. Maybe you were coming around much easier than he anticipated. He smiled to himself and on the walk home began to devise a plan to get rid of Sean. It’d only be a matter of days if everything went accordingly.
____
You were basking in the rare day off, taking every moment to enjoy doing absolutely nothing. You’d felt drained lately from your class workload, late nights at the library, and your elevating fights with Sean. He was at work today followed by an evening class so you had uninterrupted alone time. Around 10pm it took every ounce of your free will to get off the couch and get the mail.
You milled over to your box and jammed the key in. Pulling the mail out your head titled in curiosity at the large unmarked manila folder. No return address written, only yours but there was nothing indicating whether it was for you or Sean. You’d open it when you got back upstairs.
Finally back to your spot on the couch your fingers slowly undid the folder’s metal clasp and you reached inside for its contents. Out came several photos and a hastily written note. You held the grainy photos closer to your face to make out what they were. When you did your heart plummeted and you went into emotional shock.
Though the photos were grainy it was very clear what they were of. Shots of Sean and some mystery brunette making out in a bar. Sean with his arm around her waist, Sean with his hand on her ass. All the photos were timestamped for only a few days ago when he claimed his soccer game was running late. You dropped them instantly and they scattered to the floor.
Your heart was hammering in your ears, you didn’t know what to think. Sean was the only boyfriend you’d ever really had, Sean loved you, you loved him. Somewhere in the back of your mind you remembered there was a note. You searched for it and tried to read it through the tears that were beginning to blur your vision.
‘I know what you did. You tell her or I will. You have three days’
You didn’t recognize the handwriting. Who would send this? Why would they send it? You and Sean didn’t have many friends and you couldn’t picture them doing this. Maybe this is some prank? Maybe the timestamp is wrong and this is before you were together.
Sean was all you’d ever known and you shared an apartment, it’s not like you’d have anywhere to go or anyone to turn to. Should you confront him with these? It’s not like you two were exactly good at solving your problems. Would he leave you if you showed him these? What then?
Your mind was spinning, unsure of what to do with this new information. Maybe you could keep quiet about this, try to spend some more time with Sean, make him see what the two of you have. Maybe you can ask him to be home more, maybe you could be home more too.
You took a deep breath and wiped your tears before you gathered the photos and put them back into the envelope. You decided you’d hold onto them for now, tucking them away in your drawer of the dresser. Deciding you’d just work yourself up if you stayed up you shot Sean a text goodnight and went to bed.
Morning came and he was snuggled into your side, the comfort you felt had you feeling like everything might be okay for a moment. You stayed in bed just a little longer and turned so he could hold you in his arms. Your heart felt so unsure and scared, but you didn’t know what else you could do.
The week passed by and you decided to shift more of your energy towards your relationship with Sean, pushing your nights at the library to the backburner. You still hadn’t told him about the envelope but you did tell him you missed him and wished he was home more. He relented and was home four nights this week instead of his usual two.
The time together was uncomfortable but you kept telling yourself that things were getting a little better over time, even if your studies were suffering for it. As the week went on you were able to suppress your doubts about your relationship a bit more. Sean loved you and you loved him.
You couldn’t ignore the oncoming threat of midterms forever, though. The last thing you wanted was to be alone because you knew that your thoughts would just spiral but you needed to do well this semester so you grabbed your bag and headed out.
You swipe through the doors, almost looking forward to seeing Steve. You’d blown off your study session with a profuse apology so you could be with Sean. You were eager to apologize in person but found the reference desk to be completely abandoned. You frowned, maybe Steve was putting away books or something. You’d see him eventually though, for now you had an essay to write.
Hours could have gone by and you wouldn’t have known. You were getting so much done though, it felt good to be focused on something other than your own thoughts.
“Where’ve you been?”
You jump in your seat. You turn around to find Steve emerging from the shelves that were just out of your view. He wore a neutral expression but you could cut the tension with a knife. He stepped forward and you debated on what to say.
“Sorry, I had to cancel with you this week. How are you getting along?”
“Nothing another tutoring session couldn’t fix, I’m sure. Were you sick? I feel like you haven’t been here in forever. The nights get awful lonely without ya here”
Why did Steve keep making statements like that when he knew you had a boyfriend? It was driving you insane and getting harder to ignore them.
“Um, no, I was with Sean, actually. But y’know, can’t avoid midterms forever” You gave a half-hearted laugh hoping to lighten things up.
Steve’s neutral expression is slipping, but you can’t tell if he’s angry or not. But his face broke out into a small smile, putting you at ease instantly. He clapped you on the shoulder and took a step back.
“Yeah, guess you’re right. We still on for Tuesday?”
You gave him an easy smile and nodded.
“I’ll be counting the days” With that Steve disappeared back between the shelves.
____
The moment Steve placed the envelope in the mail he felt a confidence he hadn’t felt before. All he had to do was wait for you to open the envelope and everything would take its course. He knew Sean was at work and you’d be the one to get the mail that day. From his spot he’d peered in your windows all those weeks ago he watched you open the photos. You dropped them to the ground and held a hand to your mouth to cover what looked like a sob. Steve smiled to himself, now all you had to do was leave him.
The week went on and Steve figured you might need a little time to break it off and he’d be there at the library, waiting to comfort you. It’s not like you had any other friends in your life to turn to. But then you cancelled your study session with no explanation. Steve figured maybe you were still in shock, needed to cry it out alone. Then two days turned to four turned to seven.
Steve was confused, he was infuriated even. Why hadn’t you come to the library yet? Why hadn’t you texted him? There’s no way that you were actually going to stay with him after you saw him with another woman. Except that’s exactly what he did.
Looking back on it Steve recognized his mistakes. He knew you were shy and meek, sweet, it’s what he loved about you. But he should’ve accounted for this to happen. You were too sweet for your own good, wanting to make it work with Sean. It was an obstacle he hadn’t seen but this is just a slight bump in the plan. He can work around it.
When he saw you coming up the steps on the security camera he made himself scarce, not ready to face you just yet. He gave you some hours to study before he made himself known to you. He could tell just by the way you talked that you were in complete denial about what was happening. You weren’t strong enough to leave him but that’s okay, Steve is strong enough for the both of you right now, he’ll help you get there.
____
Just when you thought things were getting better Sean was back to becoming distant, going out with his teammates and coming home still a little drunk. The more you thought about those photos and thought about how he slipped back into old habits so easily the more you were working up the courage to confront him. You weren’t sure if you’d leave him, but maybe it would make him change.
Then the second envelope came. More photos of them kissing and leaving the bar together. They were time stamped just two nights ago. Your heart fell through the floor as you tried to make sense of things. How much of this could you put up with? When was enough? You needed to confront him when he got home.
You texted him to try to come home early tonight, saying it was important. You spent the rest of the evening planning out your words and trying to quell the oncoming panic attacks. Time passed by in a blur and before you knew it it was midnight and you still had no word from Sean. You couldn’t spend one more minute alone, you needed to get out. You needed a friend.
Your body was on autopilot as your feet carried you up the steps of the library. Steve wasn’t at the desk and you felt almost distressed. You knew he’d be a good third party to talk all this out to and you didn’t know what to think when he wasn’t there. You decided to shoot him a text.
‘Hey, I know you usually work Thursdays, I’ll be at my usual spot, I could really use a friend if you’re not too busy’ Did that sound too desperate? At this point you didn’t care.
You sunk down into your chair on the second floor with a huff. You hadn’t brought your bag so it’s not like you could study to distract yourself. As it turned out you didn’t need to.
“I’m never too busy for you, doll. ‘Specially not at this job” Steve’s voice carried as he rounded a corner into your sight.
You felt instantly better before you realized you were crying. It was hard to be vulnerable but if you could trust anyone with this it was Steve. You gave him a weak smile as he pulled up a chair beside you.
“What’s wrong? Do you need tissues?”
“No, sorry, I just.” You were struggling to find the words. “Sean is cheating on me”
Steve’s hands clenched into fists, he looked absolutely furious for you.
“Are you serious? That bastard! Doll, I’m so sorry. Have you confronted him?” His hand reached for yours and his thumb rubbed light circles.
“I-I, I haven’t said...anything. I just. He loves me y’know? Why would he do that? He’s all I have? What happens if he leaves me where will I stay I’ll be completely alone, I’ll-”
You had worked yourself into a panic attack as you desperately tried to take gulps of air while tears streamed down your face. You were losing touch with your surroundings and spiraling into a place you couldn’t get yourself out of. Steve moved his chair closer to you and brought you into his lap. He held your back to his chest and wrapped his arms around you. You could just make out what he was saying.
“Doll, it’s okay, I need you to breathe with me, can you do that? Take a deep breath in with me. Hold it and count to five with me,” You do but you’re still struggling. “Now exhale, count again for me. You’re doing so well, you can do this.”
Eventually Steve is able to bring you back down to Earth and you slumped back into his arms. You don’t care that Steve is holding you, it feels safe. You shifted so you could lean your head against his chest and let out a heavy sigh. He holds you to himself and lets you sit there for a while.
You don’t know how much time passes but you sit up slowly and he’s reluctant to let you go. You wipe your eyes as you go back to your own chair.
“Sorry, I’m keeping you from your job. Sorry I just totally came here and freaked out” You were starting to feel embarrassed, oversharing your life and emotions with him. You really liked him, you didn’t want to think you’d ruined the friendship.
“Don’t even apologize. You can always come to me.” He gave you a warm smile and you felt reassured. “So what are you going to do about Sean?”
Another hour had gone by with Steve and you could see the sun starting to come through the windows. You had decided you would confront him and go from there. You weren’t ready to fully commit to leaving him but this needed to end one way or another. For the first time in two weeks you felt like things were maybe going to be okay. The next time you saw Sean you were going to confront him.
____
Clearly seeing that you weren’t going to do anything after he sent the photos, he had to go to plan B. Steve waited outside the practice field and followed him to the parking structure once again. He jammed the parking stub in his jacket pocket along with the others and repeated his previous trips here. It was astounding how unaware Sean was of his surroundings, Steve had followed him and that girl from the bar back to her place at least twice now.
Getting what he needed he put another envelope in the mail the next day, this time with no note but the photos were more upsetting. It hurt Steve to hurt you but it’s what needed to be done. You were never going to confront him with things as they were so he had to push the envelope, literally and metaphorically. The hurt would be worth it though, because you came crying to him just like he’d hoped you would. Seeing your text warmed his heart, you needed him and he’d be there. Every time.
He knew he’d be comforting you but he didn’t think that he’d get to hold you. He was hiding his smile as he wrapped his arms around you and brought you down from your panic attack. You did so well listening to him and calming down. He was convinced he was the only one that could help you, you just needed to see that.
Steve abandoned his cart of books that needed to be shelved but he couldn’t care less. He’d stay up all night with you every night if that’s what it took. As dawn broke the two of you devised a plan and he built you up to say something. You weren’t committed to leaving him, which Steve wasn’t happy about, but you were committed to confronting him, if only you’d get the chance.
Based on what Steve knew of both yours and Sean's schedules you’d just miss each other between classes during the day and Sean had a game tonight, which would inevitably lead to a night at the bar. All Steve had to do was wait. He had to contain his excitement, things were finally finally falling right into place, they just needed a final push.
Nightfall came and this time Steve beat Sean to the structure. Steve parked on the top level and stuck the parking stub in his pocket. He didn’t feel like he was taking a risk by counting on Sean to follow routine, he was a good boy, he’d park in his same spot he always did and proceed to get wasted across the street.
A slow smile creeped across Steve’s face as Sean and his teammates stumbled into the bar, probably already drunk from pre-gaming. Sean’s sidepiece wouldn’t come to the bar tonight, her sorority having some dumb mixer or another. Steve reminded himself of his mantra to wait. His phone buzzed and he saw it was a text from you. You two had been texting after you came to him in the library.
‘He’s not responding to my texts. I know he had a game tonight but I really thought he’d be here’
He’d have to text you back another time, Steve needed to be on his toes tonight. He sat at what was becoming his usual booth for nearly two hours, barely touching his pint. Finally Sean paid his tab and said goodnight to his friends. Steve pulled down the brim of his hat and pursued him towards the parking structure. Drunken and fumbling up through the stairwell, Steve entered behind him quietly while taking out a knife he’d stolen from Bucky. He always knew his friend’s strange obsession with them would come in handy someday.
Just as Sean was about to take the final step Steve grabbed him from behind. Sean’s reactions may have been slowed but it hadn’t stopped him trying to thrash out of the grip. His efforts stopped immediately as Steve held the blade to his throat. He spoke clearly and in a low voice.
“Keep walking up the stairs or I will slit your fucking throat, do you hear me?” He brought the knife closer to his neck to drive home the threat.
“E-easy man, please, please don’t do this”
“Keep moving. Up.”
Steve pushed him all the way towards his car at the edge of the top level. He flipped Sean around so his back was to the ledge, the knife still trained closely on him. Pleads for mercy fell on deaf ears.
“What do you wan’!? You wan’ money!? Take, take my wallet man I don’t need it, jus’ please don’t kill me please!”
Steve pushed him slightly, though his grip on him remained tight. Sean struggled against him as his body weight wavered over the ledge. He must have realised how far up they were because he started crying at this point, begging even harder as he teetered and trying desperately to get his bearings against the wall.
“Why are you doing this!?” He wailed, “I’ll do anything, please! Please, I have a girlfriend, I have a family”
That was all that it took. Steve was feeling a high like he’d never felt. He knew at this moment he was doing the right thing for both of you. With a rush of adrenaline and in a flash of certainty he pushed Sean’s body over the edge. He didn’t watch him fall the seven stories down to the ground, but he did wait to hear the sickening crack and thud of his body hitting the ground. There was no way he’d survived.
Blood rushing through his ears, he felt euphoric, so powerful, so in love with you. He climbed back into his car and headed for his apartment. His plan wasn’t quite complete yet though, but everything he needed to do was done. He could watch the rest unfold from the sidelines. He knows you’ll be heartbroken all over again when you find out, but he’ll be there to pick up the pieces.
____
You’d been in mourning for nearly two months. The shock you’d felt wasn’t comparable to any other feeling you’d felt. The police ultimately ruled his death an accident, they performed an autopsy and found dangerous amounts of alcohol in his system. They weren’t able to pinpoint an exact time of death but estimated 2-3 AM, as he’d been found in the morning. They figured he’d just gotten piss drunk and came too close to the edge. And he was gone just like that.
His death weighed heavy on you, you blamed yourself for a long time. He wouldn’t have stayed out if you hadn’t pushed him so far away from you. The last thing you ever said to him was nagging and whiny, no wonder he didn’t want to come home. To think that you were possibly going to leave him. You felt so much self-contempt but slowly you were learning to forgive yourself.
You don’t know what you’d have done without Steve by your side. He was there for you every step of the way. He held you at the funeral, he helped you pack up Sean’s things in the apartment, he took your late night phone calls and came over at the drop of a hat to help you through your grief. You were eternally grateful for his selflessness and his willingness to help you heal.
Guilt loomed over you once again as the old feelings you’d had for Steve in the early days of your friendship started to flare up again. It felt natural to feel them, with him being closer to you than he ever was, but it didn’t stop you from feeling shame over it. You had to remind yourself that you weren’t culpable for anything that happened, that Sean himself was interested in someone else when he’d died. You had to forgive yourself for these feelings for Steve. Maybe even pursue them.
‘Can you come over tonight? I think we should talk’ Your nerves were on fire from the rush you got sending him that text.
‘How about you come to my place? 7? We can go for something to eat if you want.’ Your heart was fluttering, was this a date?
‘Sounds good :)’
Checking the time you saw it was 4, you spent the next few hours obsessing over what to say. No matter what you were determined to tell him your feelings for him. You were debating whether or not you should kiss him. Would he even want you back? What if he only sees you as a friend now? The hours whiled away and you took a deep breath before setting out.
You’d been to Steve’s apartment only once before, you knew he lived alone but he’d managed to make the place feel homey. You were buzzed in and before you had the chance to knock on the door Steve had it open and was waiting for you. His smile was all teeth and it was contagious, you smiled back looking up at him and he let you in.
You sat down on the couch and waited for Steve. No turning back now. Deep breath. He sat down and turned to face you.
“What did you want to talk about?”
No words were coming to you. Your mouth opened but you could only sputter. Oh God, where were the words? Do something!
So you did. Before you could think about it you put a shaky hand up to Steve’s jaw and pulled him in for a kiss. You didn’t know what you were feeling, you were just waiting for Steve to respond. You began to pull back but before you could he took your face in his hands and kissed you back tenderly but with purpose. Your arms were around him and he pulled you closer into his lap to kiss you more passionately.
You finally pulled apart to catch your breath. You snuck a look up to his face and you were nervous but you felt like you were floating.
“You have… no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that” He said between breaths.
You two smiled like idiots and he brought his lips to yours again. The kiss deepened and a moan slipped from your mouth. This seemed to spark something in Steve and his hands shakily moved over your body. He was feeling every curve of you and you ground down into his lap and his hips bucked up in response. You have no idea where this confidence came from but you’d never felt more sure of yourself. You broke apart again and Steve was breathing heavily.
“Is this what you want?” He asked. You could only nod before he was on you again. He pulled you up from the couch and led you to his bed. This time he laid you back and was hovering over you, slowly undoing the buttons of your jeans. You helped him get yourself out of them and pulled your shirt over your head, leaving you in just your bra and panties. How was this happening? Who cares?
He sat back and took the sight of you in, he was looking at you like you were the most precious thing. He slowly removed his clothes and moved back over you, kissing his way up your thighs before pulling your panties down your legs. He continued laving away at your skin, making you nervous but excited. His fingers brushed your core and he brought them up to his face.
“Sweetheart, you are dripping.” Your cheeks heated instantly as he chuckled. Not giving you the chance to respond he dove right in. Two fingers entered you and you arched your back, his tongue lapped up your wetness and then at your clit. You’d really never known pleasure like this, no one had ever done this for you before. His fingers pumped in and out of you and your hands flew to his hair and pulled. He continued on and curved his fingers just slightly and you clenched down around him, you were so close.
“Please, I’m so close” you whimpered.
Steve doubled his efforts and before you knew it the tension he had been building up was released in a white hot flash of ecstasy. You writhed against his fingers as he kept pumping them into you. Finally he relented, pulling them out and licking them clean. You’d never seen something that made you feel so filthy but so so good.
He took off his boxers and encased you in his arms. He kissed your neck and you moaned again at the feeling. You spread yourself for him and he lined himself up and groaned. The stretch was something you weren’t ready for. It burned almost, you cried out as he put his whole length in you. He waited all of two seconds before he began thrusting into you. You weren’t ready but you were adjusting quickly with the way his cock hit that spot inside of you over and over.
You were holding onto his shoulders, nails digging in deep as he started to go harder and faster.
“I’m close” He panted into your ear.
Reaching down his fingers found your clit and started moving back and forth quickly, trying to match his thrusts. The tension was building again to a breaking point and you were getting close again. He worked you even harder until you broke, cumming for a second time. Your eyes were screwed shut in ecstasy as you cried again.
“Steve!”
That was all it took before he slammed into you a final time, you could feel his release and you’d never felt closer to him. His movements stopped and your noses touched. He kissed you hard before rolling off of you.
“That was… oh my god” you breathed.
“I know, me too” Steve chuckled. “So can I take you to dinner?”
“Nothing would make me happier,” You grinned wide and nodded.
You cleaned yourself up and redressed. You were taking in Steve’s room and found yourself smiling at the photos of him and Bucky, little knick-knacks on his dresser. You found a sticky note on the calendar at his desk. You squinted. Had you seen his handwriting before?
You shrugged and flopped yourself back on the bed. You checked the weather on your phone and frowned at the temperature, you let out a small groan.
“What is it?” Steve called from the bathroom as he cleaned up.
“It’s so coooold and I forgot my jacket” You pouted.
“Just take mine, it’s the brown leather one hanging in the living room” He was so sweet.
Gingerly, you made your way into the living room and found the jacket, slipping it on. You don’t know what was taking Steve so long but you shoved your hands in the pockets and waited for him. You felt something in the right pocket. Is this trash? You pulled out little wadded up pieces of paper and unfolded them.
They were parking stubs. They were from the same structure that Sean had fallen from. Your heart was pounding, upset just thinking of him. Looking closer one of them was stamped for 2:15 AM, 2/1, the night that he died. Okay...
1 AM 1/15, 11:57PM 1/28, They matched the timestamp on the photos that had been sent to you. Two others were from nights when Sean had games and had stayed out late. Your heart was in your throat and tears were forming in your eyes, trying to find some explanation. You thought again of the first time you’d received an envelope, those photos, that note. It had dawned on you why the note looked so familiar… The handwriting! Oh, God... Your whole world slowed down as you heard footsteps bound into the room. Slowly you turned, the stubs still in your shaking hands.
“Oh, Sweetheart,” Steve took a step further, “You weren’t supposed to see those.”
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insertmesoftly · 2 years ago
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Bruno x Sweet Mortician OC
Ludo the mortician. They stumbled their way into the hidden village as a teenager with a concussion, lost memories, and a strange air of mystery. They were adopted by an old couple and got to live peacefully with them. Still, they didn’t make many friends. They dress in black and became somewhat the new outcast of the village because of their general odd disposition.
Since being in charge of the dead in the village was seen as a 'cursed' job (one no one wants to do and everyone hates), it was usually a responsibility alternated between people. But some stuff would just be too.... much for some families to get through so eventually, as an orphan teen, Ludo picked up their britches and ran through everything, talking to the family of the lost one, setting up the flowers and the burial and planning who brings what when. They figured since no one wanted the job... they could settle down and take it. And they like it.
The village is grateful... but also concerned and a little put off by their calm attitude with death. They now live next to the cemetery; a home was built specifically for them. They take care of the gravestones and talk to themselves because they live mostly alone and only come to the village in the mornings for supplies.
~
The town went up to help build the Madrigal’s house. The last one to know that it had even collapsed and needed fixing was Ludo when they went in the morning to get some eggs and they see the commotion. They ask about it at the shop, and people tell them about the Madrigals having lost their home and powers.
'Oh no, I should go give my condolences… Wait, no one died, right?"
"Oh um.... no, someone would’ve called for you if they did. We are ALL good here..... haha actually, I guess you could say the opposite happened. Someone was found."
"Found? Like. When I come into the village? Do we have another outsider-"
"Nono, the missing Madrigal! Bruno! He came back-"
"HAVEANICEDAY!WHEREDIDYOUSAYTHEYWERESTAYING?NO-WAIT-I REMEMBER! OKTHANKYOUBYYEEEEE"
"............. they forgot the eggs..."
Ludo rushes to try to see if they can get a peek and their eyes scan through the people coming in and out of the home of a villager kind enough to let some of the Madrigals stay (id imagine they stay at different homes each) and.......... they can’t see anyone 7 feet tall.
... maybe this was the wrong house.
They try looking around, bumping into people who brush them off cuz they know how loopy Ludo is, until they stumble HARD onto someone else that was also not paying attention, trying to shy away from people, hiding in the shadows. Ludo had never seen him before.
"Oh, uh. I-I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention-"
"... neither was I...." 
He helps them up and let’s go of their hand, trying to walk away. "I'll just- Sorry I'll go-"
"Nononono-"
They grab at his hand again and now Bruno has his attention on em.
"What's your name?"
"...... Bruno...."
"BRUNO!"
They’re so excited. "Bruno! You're Bruno!"
"I'm Bruno, yes-"
"Woah....... you're...."
They flit around him, still holding his hand. "You're not 7 feet tall."
"Ah- about that-"
They notice a rat on his shoulder. "Oh, but you DO talk to rats!"
"Yes well, they've always kept me company..."
"That is so cute!" This makes Bruno's brain stop and sputter from shock.
"C-Cute? You think talking to rats..."
"Yes." They nod enthusiastically. "I wish I could talk to rats. The animals in the cemetery just run from me. Spiders are my only real source of company there…."
“............" Bruno is beginning to wonder if he's being made fun of. He notices his hand still on theirs. He tries to let go. "I should.... get back..."
"Oh no." They link his fingers to theirs and begin moving him along, making him trip a bit. "We are going to my home. Have you eaten breakfast? I should pick up my eggs. You don’t have anything else to do, right, with the house and the stuff? Ah- I’m sure they can take care of it. We are going to have FUN!!! Wow. Bruno. Brunoooooo~!"
They begin humming the song and Bruno can’t help be swept along, some villagers seeing them and getting bug eyed. The vendor of the eggs shakes her head as they leave her stand. Bruno and Ludo.
What’s going to happen there?
~
Ludo had always loved the Bruno 'horror stories.’ They always felt a kinship with the only other soul in town that people had been wary of. Now that he was there, of course they reasoned it should be okay to take him to their home for a talk! They didn’t notice Bruno being uncomfortable at all.
He’s nervous as they hold his hand and take him far away from the town, panicking and repeating questions that are never answered, Ludo is too focused on the trip. When they reach Ludo’s home... Bruno is wide-eyed staring at the cemetery next door. the cemetery. He is confused, but finally, Ludo brings him inside, sits him down in the kitchen, and introduces themselves with an offering of tea.
"I want to know everything about you."
As they sit down. Bruno is tense. Ludo is weird and can’t stop looking him over, clearly hanging on Bruno's every word. He's nervous; he doesn’t know how to read them, doesn’t know what they want from him exactly....  but he talks about what happened. Why he ‘disappeared.’ He got very… emotional talking about this to someone outside the family for the first time. He was staring at his cup of tea in silence.
Ludo exhales a breath they had kept. "I'm so sorry that happened to you.... you have such a big heart." With zero hesitation, they hold his hand, and Bruno’s shoulders... let up.
"Uh. T-thanks... it.... well, it was hard but. Things are okay now..." He tries a weak smile. Ludo smiles back.
"Yeah. I’m glad you’re here! Now we're going to be friends!"
They just decided it. So, they'll keep coming from the shadows to see what Bruno's up to, taking him back to their cottage near daily, just talking, and being soft together. Bruno found them a bit off-putting and pushy at first, but they grow on him because they never once make him feel like the weird one. He gets to feel good around them. So, he likes being near them more every time.
~
Bruno has been having difficulty in the house he's staying in because its crowded and he thinks he's scaring their children too much. Bruno mentions this one day as they shared another morning cup of coffee, and Ludo immediately shoots up from their seat.
'Stay with me. It’ll be like a sleepover! Holy bones, this is going to be fun!!!' They’re already going outside, no thoughts, just action, and Bruno follows behind. He’s anxious but doesn’t fight the idea too much. He just keeps asking if it’s ok with them, concerns that Ludo brush off like dirt.
‘Why WOULDN’T I want you in my home? You’re a joy to have around!’
That shuts Bruno up for the rest of the walk. They get his stuff no problem and the town is giving them eyes once again as they leave to Ludo’s home.
After sleeping in a cramped room with others around him now that he’s offered the couch and the peace and quiet of living so far from town… Bruno gets a bit too overwhelmed. He relapses and gets nightmares from his time sleeping and living alone in the walls. Ludo immediately notices that he isn’t getting enough sleep, and they force him to reveal why.
Now, they sleep in the same room together. Ludo is not one to question helping his friend and does not mind sharing their ‘personal space.’
Bruno hates feeling like he’s taking advantage of their kindness, but he keeps agreeing to the offers they give him. Bruno is sleeping in the floor with blankets, but just knowing someone else is in the room is so comforting. He sleeps peacefully. Slowly, they go from him in the floor to them both on the floor (because Ludo decides they want to join and they end up making a pillow fort of sorts one night) to them both being in the bed when the fort is knocked over. Bruno is nervous, but by that point they’ve gotten very close… close enough that, as they were both laying on the bed on top of the covers just seeing the ceiling, he's begins confessing to some more trauma and depressive moments in his life.
Moments like his room changing to have so many stairs after he 'ruined' Pepa's wedding because his family was so 'disappointed in him' and he was ashamed. When he finally came out of his room after not having a proper meal in so long, no one really acknowledged it but Julieta, who gave him food and insisted that he was skinnier. All this while Abuela simple, sternly reminded him that he needs to take care of himself, he’s not a child. And Pepa refused to even look at him because she was still mad, she merely breezed by with a cloud over her head and left before it rained. In the end, he just crawled back to his room and it filled with sand a little more.
Ludo is holding onto him, latched on. They repeat like a chant- "I’m so glad you’re here. I’m so glad you’re here.’
He has one arm over them, trying to breath as he’s trying not to cry, and cracks his voice saying 'Yeah. I’m... glad I’m here too...... thank you.' He tries to laugh. 'Thanks for having me-'
 Don’t thank me, it’s NO PROBLEM AT ALL! You can stay as long as you want. You know that. I love having you here, you've made me so happy with your company!'
He's laughing more. This is unbelievable. 'And you me! I’m glad you.... like having me here I didn’t- think it was possibly for anyone to enjoy having me around.' Ludo squeezes him harder and.....
...... who knows. Maybe this. All of this night makes Ludo be brave and kiss him for the first time. Once they calmed down and actually agreed on going to bed together, they surprise him by brushing his hair back, him getting shy, and they plant a quick peck on his lips. Bruno’s red.
'What just-'
‘I told you. I like you.'
‘But-'
‘Hah. Sweet dreams, Ratman.'
They curl themselves onto his chest, face hidden. He can only hold them loser, wanting not to cry again, feeling so unbearably soft and like he can’t sleep. He just wants to stay awake and keep holding them.
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hyetiny · 4 years ago
Note
so for the part two i love the idea of bringing the wife because id love to see how you will write that! and maybe they'll proceed to be in a poly relationship or idk. It's up to you tho! I'm looking forward to what you will come up for part two!
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c// fem!reader, open relationship, gxg, mentions of polyamory, threesome, oral (f and m receiving), squirting, unprotected sex
part 2 of this, so please read that so you know what's going on!
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you wake up to a text from the one and only jung wooyoung
you groan and bring yourself to read it, not wanting to remind yourself of last night's events
"please let me explain"
"can i come over today?"
"it isn't what you think"
"i really didn't mean to hurt you y/n."
sighing, you decide to see what he has to say
you finally reply to the text after you get through your morning routine and eat breakfast
"i'm free right now. come over if you want."
he sees it straight away
and soon enough there's a knock on the door
you open it and there he is
you don't know if you're imagining the sadness there
"hey." he gives you a small smile
it still gives you butterflies-
you settle comfortably on the sofa
"my wife and i are in an open marriage"
it's not what you expected him to say at all
the concept is a bit foreign to you
so your initial reaction is confusion
"it means we can have sex with other people-"
"i know what it means woo." you roll your eyes, still a little bit mad at him
"what about your kids?" you ask
"they're children, obviously they don't know about how their mum and dad's relationship works. but we love each other and decided to settle. that includes having kids."
it makes more sense to you now
"i see." you mumble.
"so are we good then?"
"i just wish you had told me before rather than springing it on me after taking my virginity and making me feel guilty." you say.
"you're right, i'm sorry for that." he says
you can't be mad at him for any longer with the way his eyes are all sad
"how about i make it up to you?"
you raise a brow
"how would you do that?"
"i'll give you a proper first time. even better than last night."
you choke on your spit
"it's okay if you don't want to." he says
you forget how casual people can be about sex sometimes
but you have to admit, you'd love to feel wooyoung's cock inside you again
it was literally one of the best things you had ever felt
"and if you wanted to, we could include a third?"
it confuses you
"a third?"
"my wife likes pretty girls like you."
if only you had a dollar for everytime wooyoung shocked you in this conversation
"think about it, okay? there's no rush."
he kisses your forehead before walking off with a smirk
your heart is pounding
surely you wouldn’t have sex with a mother and father
and at the same time as well
the decision seems pretty easy
but something inside you wants to see what it’ll be like
two people playing with you at the same time-
their hands all over you
wooyoung filling you up while his wife watches, or vice versa-
oh, you’re wet
frustrated at your inner thoughts, you decide to rub one out
teasing your clit, playing with your entrance imagining it’s wooyoung or his wife
you don’t know what she looks like so in your head she’s just a faceless woman
when you’re done, you text him
“let’s do it” 
you organize a date and time when their kids are out for their karate classes
that gave you two hours
you come over, extremely nervous, and knock on their door
you’re wearing an outfit that’s easy to take off - a hoodie with nothing underneath and matching sweatpants
if wooyoung is the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen, then the woman who opens the door is the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen
power couple, you think
“hi, you must be y/n.” she smiles. “wow, you’re even prettier than woo described.” 
you’re absolutely done for
“th-thank you.” you say shyly. “you’re even prettier than i imagined.”
she smiles too and you’re both falling into easy conversation
soon enough wooyoung walks in with no shirt on, and you can’t help but gawk
“good to see you too y/n”. he giggles
and he goes right at it, kissing you and groping your thighs
he definitely has a thing for thighs and ass
“let’s at least get to the bedroom.” his wife tuts
when you get there he’s all over both of you
you can tell he’s been looking forward to this
he gives you neck kisses while playing with his wife’s chest
and the sound of both of you whining/moaning is the prettiest thing ever
it gets wooyoung fully hard
soon he’s taking off his wife’s bottoms and going straight to licking right up her core
“watch and learn, y/n” he winks
you pay attention to how he focuses on her clit
how he uses a finger to play with her entrance
it earns the prettiest moans from her, which makes you even wetter
he’s sucking her clit, slowly easing a finger into her entrance
“w-woo, i’m gonna-” she moans
and he pulls away
“be a good girl and finish her off for me, y/n” he smiles, his lips glistening with her juices
you’re dripping at this point
but you had never eaten a girl out before
she notices your hesitance and nervousness
“it’s okay baby, i’ll guide you” she smiles
you mirror wooyoung’s actions, licking a stripe up her vulva
it pulls a loud whine from her, and she’s grinding up against your tongue
she holds the back of your head, gently guiding you like she said
you leave feathery kisses and licks on her clit
you must be doing a good job because she quickly becomes a shaking mess
“o-oh god, y/n i’m-” 
what you don’t expect is for her juices to squirt all over your tongue
“wow.” wooyoung says, breathless. “she hardly ever does that.” 
you see that he’s been jerking off this whole time
“how about we treat wooyoungie for being so patient?” 
she gestures for you to follow her lead as she leans forward and takes his tip into her mouth
then she starts kitten licking the length of his cock
you join her, and you both suck his cock together c:
things to do w your bestie amirite
he’s bucking his hips forward while you both tongue the sides of his cock
“s-stop, i wanna cum inside either one of you” he stutters
“y/n’s been such a good girl for us, you should make her cum” his wife says
he nods, getting himself ready and putting on a condom
he makes you get on all fours, lifting your hips up
his wife positions herself in front of you, legs spread
you whine with each inch wooyoung slides into you
you flush at how his wife can see every single expression you make like this
and at the same time you have a full view of her pussy, how wet she is and every single needy twitch of it
she starts touching herself, playing with her entrance, and you swear it’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen
needily, you lift a hand up, going to touch her core
“ah-ah, hands to yourself y/n. pay attention to how good wooyoungie’s making you feel.” she tuts
his pace increases, and he’s going even harder and deeper than the first time you fuck
he hits that spot every single time, making you see stars
you can smell wooyoung’s wife’s arousal, and it gets you even closer to your edge
“oh my god-” you cut yourself with a cry, clenching around wooyoung as your orgasm hits you harder than the ones he had given you before
his wife cums at the same time, riding out her high as she fills herself up with her fingers
you all take a moment to catch your breath, sharing kisses here and there
“that was really hot. we should do it more often.” wooyoung grins.
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missymurphy1985 · 3 years ago
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The Strip Club - Cillian Murphy X Female OC
A/N - Set in 2010, and I've used fictional names for his wife/children
A night out with his brother and closest friends doesn't end the way Cillian expects it to.
Warning - Smut
Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @ntmynouis @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @noctvrnalmoth @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @namelesslosers @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen @cilleveryone
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"I'm really not up for this Pad, can't we just go for a beer at the Anchor instead?" Cillian complained to his younger brother.
"You haven't been out with us in months, Dermot has had this all planned out for ages Cill, come on!" He rolled his eyes, knowing he couldn't get out of it, no matter what he said. Pulling his boots on, the two of them left the house, getting into the waiting taxi outside.
Walking into the strip club via the VIP entrance at the back, Cillian kept his head low and his brother and friends close around him so as not to be seen. Last thing he needed was photos in the press of him coming here!
"We're here for The Secret Show? Booked under Padraig Murphy?" Paddy told the bouncer, who checked everyone's ID and led them through a curtained off section at the back of the club. No cameras, no members of the public, completely private.
The boys sat around the stage area, a waitress coming over to take their drinks order. Once she returned with them, the lights dimmed and the music from the movie Burlesque began to play through the speakers. A single spotlight on a stool on the stage.
Cillian could feel his cheeks burning, he genuinely had never felt so uncomfortable in his life. He'd never been to a place like this, had always avoided them like the plague. The idea of a stripper had never appealed to him. Someone he'd never met, stripping to her underwear to please him and his drunk friends and even more cringe-worthy, his little brother, was not something he was remotely interested in.
The dancer came out, swaying her hips as she walked to the stool. Perching herself on it, legs crossed. Dressed in a black corset, short black skirt, fishnet stockings, black stiletto heels, and a black masquerade mask covering the top half of her face. Her long, silky brown hair flowing loosely down her back.
She was beautiful, there was no mistaking it. Cillian spotted Paddy nudging Dermot and whispering something in his ear and rolled his eyes. Probably something incredibly inappropriate about the young girl in front of them. He couldn't help feel sorry for her - lecherous old men creeping all over her as she danced for them, throwing money at her like she was a cheap prostitute...
The routine began. Cillian remained stoic, arms folded across his chest while the other lads cheered, louder each time an item of clothing was sexily removed from her lithe body. Her heels had been kicked off, her stockings slowly moving down her thighs, he couldn't watch any more. Standing, he made his way over to the bar to order another Guinness.
"I'd have thought you'd be over there enjoying the show with your friends?" A familiar voice from behind the bar startled him.
"Kate?"
"Long time no see," she smiled.
"Wow! Last person I expected to bump into tonight, how are you?"
"I'm okay, I see you're doing pretty well too." He nodded, his latest film, Inception, had been a box office smash. Professionally, at least, he could say he was doing well.
"Yeah, I guess so." His head lowered slightly, as Kate placed his pint in front of him.
"You guess? You okay?"
"What? Oh yeah, yeah I'm fine. Although, no disrespect? Kinda wish I was anywhere but here right now!" He chuckled. Kate smirked.
"I get off in 20minutes, fancy a walk?"
"You know what, I'll take you up on that Kate. I'll meet you outside?"
"Deal."
Thirty minutes later, after Cillian had made his excuses to his brother, he was smoking a cigarette walking along the canal with Kate at his side.
"Did you travel the world like you planned after school?" He asked, stubbing the cigarette out on the floor.
"I did, a full year of travelling before I went to university."
"Where did you go?" She told him about Australia, backpacking across Vietnam and Thailand, before heading to California for three months on a work visa.
"It was amazing. Truly wonderful. I met some great people over there. But all good things must come to an end, right?" She looked at him, and quickly looked away.
"I couldn't stand in the way of you living your dream Kate, you know that. We ended on grand terms though, right?" She linked her arm through his and squeezed it.
"We did. Promised we'd stay in touch though didn't we..."
"Yeah, I admit that was my fault. Tanya wasn't overly keen on you was she?" His ex wife. Or soon to be ex, anyway.
"I'm sorry about what happened Cill. Are you okay?"
"I'm getting there, you know? If she'd rather fuck her friend's husband instead of her own, then so be it," he smiled as much as he could.
"Well if it's any consolation, she's clearly lost her mind." She squeezed his arm again, and he found himself moving it so it was wrapped over her shoulders. He could feel her shivering and pulled her a little tighter against him.
They approached a small apartment block around 100yards further down the canal, and Kate dug her keys out of her handbag.
"Thanks for walking me home. It was good to see you again," she smiled, unhooking herself from him.
"Maybe I could - " he was interrupted by the door opening, and a younger girl stood in the doorway with a toddler in her arms.
"I'm so sorry Kate, I gave her Calpol an hour ago but I couldn't get her to settle..."
"Hey it's okay, I'll take her now. Get yourself home sis, I'll see you tomorrow yeah?" The young girl nodded, before nodding at Cillian and heading off down the street.
"Liane grew up!" Cillian laughed. The last time he'd seen her she'd still been in primary school. "And who's this little one?" He reached for the toddlers hand, grinning when she took his little finger and squeezed it.
"This is my daughter, Lily."
"Well Lily, you've certainly got your mama's eyes, haven't you?" Cillian glanced quickly at Kate's left hand.
"Her Dad isn't around Cill, I'm not married." He bent his head down. Busted.
"Then am I allowed in for a coffee at least?"
"If you don't mind sharing me with a teething baby, then yes, you can come in!" Kate led him through and fetched the teething granules from the cupboard and a teething ring from the freezer. Cillian offered to take Lily while she prepped a cup of warm milk for her.
Seeing him bounce her on his arm made her smile.
"Reminds me of Jack and Niamh when they were teething. Had to be moving around, constantly needed distraction. You okay if I take her a walk around after? See if I still have the magic touch?"
Kate nodded, and took her back to give her the nurofen, teething granules, followed by her sippy cup of warm milk. Once she'd finished, Cillian offered his arms out for her. She reached up for him, surprising Kate as she normally shied away from strangers, and off they went around the apartment. She watched from a distance as he took her around, showing her the ornaments on the window ledge, her reflection in the mirror, bouncing her up and down as she giggled lightly.
After around fifteen minutes, he made his way over to the radio in the kitchen, fiddling with the buttons before he found the station he was looking for. Soft, gentle classical music played through the speakers. He turned the volume down so it was barely audible, and leaned Lily into his shoulder, rocking her side to side gently. She nuzzled into his neck, Kate watching, smiling, as her baby's eyes grew heavier. She could feel past feelings coming back as she watched them. As much as she'd pretended losing him when he left University to pursue his acting career was fine and she had gotten over it, she never had. And now, bumping into him again all these years later, those feelings were coming back with some force.
Lily was snoring gently in his arms now, and Kate gently took her from him. Taking her into a small room at the back of the apartment. Coming out ten minutes later and closing the door as quietly as possible.
"I'd say you still have it Cill," she laughed, switching the baby monitor on in the corner of the living room where he sat on the sofa, two glasses of red wine in front of him. "You read my mind."
She sat next to him, clinking her glass with his.
"Did you meet her Dad while you were travelling?" He asked, after taking a sip.
"Yeah.. he erm.. he died not long ago. Cancer."
"Shit I'm sorry... Oh Kate that's awful..."
"No it's okay.. it was just a brief fling you know, we weren't together or anything. But it's sad for her. She'll never have that father figure. Just me and her against the world now." She felt his fingers brush her hair out of her face and gently down her cheek. Turning to him, she put her glass down on the table and turned to face him. He placed his down too, and moved closer.
Their faces centimetres apart, she could feel his warm breath against her own.
"I should probably go..."
"Again?" She whispered. She didn't want him to leave her again, as much as he had no intention of actually leaving. Their lips met, a kiss that was fifteen years overdue.
"I haven't spent a day not thinking about you, Kate..." He smiled, pulling away.
"You mean that, or are you just looking to get your end away?"
"Which is why I'm going to kiss you now, and go home. But I want to see you again. If I can?"
"And what if I don't want you to go home..." She kissed him again, this time straddling her legs over his thighs on the sofa. Even if this was a one night stand for him, she needed him, and he wasn't getting away this time.
"Then I'm not going home." His hips rose to meet hers, gyrating over his erection under his jeans, both of them removing each others clothes in record time until they were left in just their underwear.
"My god, you're incredible... Let me taste you..." He flipped her onto her back on the sofa, spreading her legs and placing gentle kisses along the inside of her thighs. His fingers teasing against her underwear, softly caressing her mound, before sliding a finger inside and groaning at how wet she was already.
"Cillian please...." She almost whimpered underneath him, her hips squirming against his lips and fingers. He pulled her underwear down her legs, and unceremoniously threw them across the room before moving his lips to her open slit, drawing his tongue slowly up and down her folds. Her hand flew to her mouth, stifling the cry of ecstacy within it so as not to wake Lily.
"You need to be quiet, you're not going to want me to stop once I've started Kate..." He smirked, before attacking her clit with his mouth, drawing it between his lips, rolling his tongue over it, increasing the pressure. His fingers pressing into her thighs, surely leaving bruises, as his mouth worked magic on her, her hips rocking against him.
"Oh god... That's so good, please don't stop..." Her words coming out in breathy little moans as her orgasm built quickly. Her fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him where she needed him. Two fingers suddenly entered her, making her gasp as they found the small bundle of nerves deep inside her, pushing and rubbing against it hard, matching his motions against her clit. Suddenly his mouth was off her, his fingers pumping into her, the palm of his hand pressed against her clit now as he moved his body up, his lips now pressed to hers. The taste of herself on him turned her on further, and she could feel herself letting go.
"Cum for me..." He whispered in her ear, sending her over the edge with a small cry into his shoulder, her body writhing against him. His fingers removed, replaced with his now solid cock as it pushed inside her quickly, picking up the same pace his hands were, hard and fast thrusts as he hooked her leg up under his elbow, forcing himself deeper.
Her nails scraped over his shoulders as she buried her face into his neck, frantic thrusts against each other, fifteen years of buried feelings coming out of them with a force that took her breath away.
"Yes... God yes..." Her moans into his neck drove him wild, her walls contracting around him pushing him closer. He could feel another orgasm building inside her, and angled his thrusts to hit that magical spot inside her perfectly.
"I'm so close Kate... So fucking close, you feel so good around me..."
"Cum inside me Cillian, please..." He grunted against her ear, nibbling on it gently as his hips pounded into her relentlessly now. Reaching his high, he flooded her, spilling inside her with a deep groan into her neck, sending her into her second orgasm, her legs wrapping tightly around his back pulling him even deeper inside her as she felt his cock pulsate, emptying into her.
He rested his forehead against hers, both of them panting, smiles forming as they looked into each others eyes.
"You're on the pill, right?" He chuckled, coming back to his senses.
"No." He lifted his head quickly.
"What?" She started to giggle, grinning at him.
"I'm on the coil, you're fine, don't worry!" He rested his head back into her neck, breathing a sigh of relief.
"Good to hear. I think three kids between us is enough for now, don't you?"
"What do you mean, for now?"
"I made the biggest mistake of my life leaving you Kate, I'm not planning on doing it again," his lips gently kissed the side of her neck, running the tip of his nose along her jawline softly.
He pulled out of her with a groan, taking her hand and leading her into her bedroom - he'd clocked which one it was earlier that evening.
Kate smiled watching him grow hard again, knowing not much sleeping was going to be done once they got in there...
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anythingforspence · 4 years ago
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the capstone - chapter one
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Summary: Reader is a semester away from getting her masters in Psychology and duringher last semester she has to complete her capstone, or passion project if you will. This year, the professors decided that each student will be personally mentored by a psycologyst in distinct fields. When Y/N meets hers, she can’t decide whether she is lucky or if it will be a long 5 months.
Pairing: Female reader x Spencer Reid
Word Count: 1.8 k
Chapter warning: harsh language, sexy talk, no smut yet
A/N: omg tysm for all of the love on the teaser post. i hope i dont dissapoint.
Although I’m wide awake, I let my alarm clock keep beeping and beeping and beeping as I stare up at the white ceiling of my cheap studio apartment. My neighbor woke me up bright and early this morning by doing what sounded like lugging a dead body throughout his apartment. I lifted my head slightly just to slam it back against my bed, whining about being awake at 5:30 am. I’m probably just nervous. I have to complete this passion project for my psychology class by being mentored by a famous psychologist and write a paper about their career and their wisdom I guess. I have a meeting with my mentor today and I don’t know what to expect. My professor kept the identity of our mentors a secret. For the “excitement” and whatnot.
With a sigh, I swing my legs over the side of my bed and bend over to switch off the alarm. Resting my elbows on my knees, I run my hands down my face, basically prepping myself for the fact that I have to stand up soon. The moment I stand, I stretch all throughout my body, ending with my hands high above my head, stretching into the ceiling. My mouth getting ready to yawn when a bang was heard next door, like a book being chucked against the wall ajoined with my neighbors apartment causing me to yelp. I’m pretty sure I heard a chuckle in response to my scream. I glared at the wall, thinking of all the ways I could storm in there and punch my neighbor. I had two choices. I could storm in there and do all the things I wish I could do, or I could mind my business and get ready for the day.
Rolling my eyes I decided to just get ready. I still wanted payback, however, I blasted Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now by The Smiths as I head into the showe. I grab brown trousers, a white button up, and a sage green set of lace undergarments. Not that anyone would see them, unfortunately there has been a drought of sorts in my pants. I just wear them for the aesthetic. Getting undressed, I put on my favorite playlist with all of the songs that make me feel like I’m the main character in an indie film. I heard a light tapping at my door, like some wanted my attention but at the same time wished I never paid attention to them. I decided to ignore it and step under the stream of water in my shower.
Once I was all finished with my shower, I stepped out into my foggy bathroom. Singing along to Bug Collector by Haley Heynderickx, I start drying off and slip on my outfit for the day. I keep my hair in a towel to help it dry some so I don’t have to use any heat on my hair. For my makeup I decided to go for a red lip, neutral blush, mascara, and brows today. Something simple and professional. I let my hair out of the towel and brush it out, not doing too much to it. Blowing myself a kiss in the mirror, I grab my purse and wrap my student ID around my neck, letting it fall next to the golden flower chained to my neck.When I open the door, I laugh in shock at the note my neighbor left for me.“nice taste in music”
I felt something against my leg and knew exactly who it was. “Hi, Payton,” I sweetly spoke to the Sphynx cat at my feet. I named her Payton even though she’s not technically mine and just wanders through the apartment complex. I bend down to give her scratches at her neck. “How’s my cutie patootie. Did you see the asshole who left this not?” She just tilted her head more into my hand, telling me to keep on scratching. “Guess not.” I stand back up and check the time on my watch, “Shit”. I had five minutes to get there.
-----
A bell rang as I entered the coffee shop I was supposed to meet my mentor at, of course with my favorite mask on. My eyes scan the place a little before I walk up to the counter to order my favorite drink. “Hi can I just get a 16 ounce Earl Grey, please?” The barista said something along the lines of yes of course and how my total was 2.16. “Alrighty, thank you.” It didn’t take too long for it to be done. They weren’t very busy and it’s just a tea bag and hot water.
“Excuse me, are you Y/F/N Y/L/N?” 
Woah. His voice sent a tingle down my spine. Probably just because I haven’t had much human contact or the fact that I haven’t been laid in a while but, my god, what I would give for him to say my name again. But that was nothing compared to what I saw when I turned around. I’m just glad I was wearing a mask so he didn’t the way my lips parted when my eyes met his. He had curly brown hair and he dressed like an old man, doesn’t sound like much but for me, that’s everything. Oh my gosh, and he had nerdy little cute glasses? When I realized I was staring I averted my eyes and started blushing.
“Um, yes, hi, that’s my name. I’m so sorry, but what’s your name?” The tremor in my voice made me want to just drop dead. I’m a woman of science but if the Earth knew how to open up and swallow people, now would be the time to prove it.
“Oh hi. I’m Doctor Spencer Reid. I’m your psychology mentor. Did your professor not tell you?” He seemed so confused, oh my god he’s so cute.
“Oh. Oh my God I’m so sorry! My professor didn’t let us know who was mentoring us, just in case we did prior research or something. I’m sorry. But yes um I’m Y/N. It’s very nice to meet you, sir,” I kept on rambling, looking anywhere but his eyes. Unfortunately, it made me look like I was checking him out. Oh fuck.
Chuckling a bit, he goes, “Oh no your fine. No need to apalogize. It’s a pleasure to meet you miss Y/N.” Not going to lie, the way he said my name sent tingles to my pussy. Oh my god what is wrong with me! I can’t be thinking these things about the person who is going to mentor me! Stop being so horny.
I started to blush and I cleared my throat and gestured towards the window. “Um, should we go sit out there?”
“Oh yes of course. Please after you,” he said, his hand finding the small of my back, hitching my breath and making me nervously mess with the rings on my fingers. We sat at the iron tables outside of the coffee shop, he pulled my chair open for me, finally his hands off of me. I felt like I could breathe again but at the same time I felt sad, empty. He took off his mask to take a sip of what he was drinking and holy shit. He had some scruff and his lips just looked so inviting. I wanted to distract from the silence that was biting at me. “So, uh, what do you do?” My voice trailing off, making everything so much heavier with awkwardness and the sexual tension that was just coming from me.
“What do you mean what do I do?” Fuck. I looked so stupid of course he does something in pschology. That’s the whole reason you’re here.
“W-well, um, like what specific area do you work in?”
“I do criminal profiling with the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI.” My eyebrows bunch together in confusion. What does that have to do with psychology? Almost as if he’s reading my mind he continues, “We psycho analyze crime scenes, victims, bodies to understand why a criminal would do what they did, which helps us to understand the type of person they are, their background, and it leads us to the criminal, or unsub.”
“Wow that’s actually really cool. But, like, how does that all work?”
“Tell me, Y/N, when was the last time you had sex?” I didn’t say anything. I was so shocked. First off, how inappropriate, but also how did he know? “When I first walked in, you kept on looking me up and down as if you’ve never seen a man before. You keep fidgeting with your rings. Usually new jewelry makes people fidget but the stains on your fingers suggest you wear rings frequently which means you're nervous. Also ever since I’ve taken my mask offyou haven’t stopped staring at my lips. So, sweet girl, tell me when was the last time you were satisfied?”
I just sat there, gapping at him like a fish out of water. What was I supposed to say? Why thank you for asking, although the last time I’ve had sex was a year ago but the last time I’ve orgasmed has been longer? Before I could come up with an answer he got a phone call. Someone named Morgan needed him or something. Whatever it was, it seemed urgent.“Sorry our meeting got cut short, Y/N. Very important FBI business came up. Here is my card, has my name, email and phone number. I recommend calling me because I don’t usually check my emails or my texts. Your professor already gave me your contact information so I know how to find you. I am very excited for the upcoming months.”
“Oh- uh, thank you,” I whispered, still shocked. He grabs my hand so that he can hand me my card since I haven’t moved a muscle. 
“Oh and Y/N?” My head wips up at him and I let out a “hmm?” that could be mistaken for a moan. “Green is a nice color on you.” Confused, I looked down to see my button up shirt had popped open, letting my green covered tits be seen by the world. Eyes blown open, I immediately cover myself and say a thank you that sounded so embarrassing because my voice cracked. He just chucked and told me he would contact me soon. Before he left, I could’ve sworn he looked at me as if I was a sexy hollywood actress or something. But I brushed it off. Maybe he was concerned for me. After all, I had my tits out and made it obvious that I was desperately horny. God these five months will be awful if I keep thinking about Dr. Reid as a sex partner than a mentor. Then again the concept of having sex with your mentor can be hot. Nope. No. I should stop there.
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fific7 · 3 years ago
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Cold Day in Hell - Part 1
Logan Delos x Reader
A/N: This does not completely follow canon, it’s mainly lemon zest 🍋 because the world needs more Logan Delos.
Warnings: 18+ NSFW due to sexual content, including oral, between consenting adults* in future chapters. Drinking and swearing.
*Irl, please don’t go wild in the country without protection.
(My GIF)
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Logan Delos was bored. Mind-numbingly, screamingly, terminally bored. He was rapping out an irritated drum solo on the arm of his chair with his long fingers. He was shifting in his seat, constantly crossing and un-crossing his long legs. He was moving the papers on the conference table in front of him from side to side, then backwards and forwards.
The businessman who was talking through the main presentation had a voice that was flatter than roadkill and had only one tone... monotone.
Logan leant forward and propped his elbows on the conference table in front of him, using his fingers to physically hold open his eyelids as they kept closing of their own accord. He felt a yawn coming on and fought to stop his mouth opening to accommodate it... but failed.
He was aware of the door to the conference room opening behind him but didn’t even have the energy to turn and see who it was. This asshole is draining the fucking will to live out of me, he thought. He vaguely heard said asshole saying something about his colleague talking through the next section of the presentation.
Logan sat right up in his seat as he spotted a beautiful - no, stunning - woman making her way to the front of the room. She was dressed in ‘business smart’ but even those sensible items couldn’t hide her curves. Her hair was pinned up, and he had already started fantasising about loosening it and running his hands through it. He wished he’d paid attention when Asshole had said her name. Or had he said her name? Logan had no idea.
He heard her starting to speak, a melodic voice... he had to know her name! Logan tutted and picked up the meeting agenda, riffling back and forth through the pages to get to the correct one, but wasn’t even sure what page he should be on. Suddenly the folder tumbled from his hands and clattered onto the floor. The talking stopped and he became aware of everyone’s eyes on him, including hers. In fact, she was kind of glaring at him.
He gave an apologetic wave to the room in general as he retrieved the folder from the floor. She began speaking again, and he resumed his page-riffling. Finally he found the current one, and there was her name in black and white. A melodic name to match her voice, he thought.
He started paying attention to what she was actually saying.
»»————————————-———- ⚜ ———————————-————-««
You’d just started your part of the presentation when some asshole dropped his agenda folder, the sharp noise bringing you to a screeching halt. When you saw a hand waving around in the air, your eye followed the arm down to its owner and noted that he was in fact a very good-looking asshole. But he was still an asshole.
You cleared your throat, trying to collect your thoughts and then launched back into your presentation. The asshole was now staring at you relentlessly; every single time your eyes swept the room, his dark eyes were on you. Like... always on you. Not like the others, who were at least glancing down at the handouts occasionally.
The section you were presenting drew to a close, and you now took an empty seat at the table. It was diagonally opposite the handsome asshole. Who was still staring at you.
Now that you were much closer, you could see that his eyes were a dark chocolate brown, with a wicked gleam in them. They matched his shining dark hair, which was immaculately swept back from his forehead. You boldly met his stare for a while, before breaking eye contact to listen to your colleague Craig deliver the final part.
At the end of the presentation there were a few questions which were duly answered, and then everyone was gathering up their paperwork and milling around prior to leaving the conference room. As you tucked your folders away in your document bag, in your peripheral vision you became aware of a pair of long legs making their way to you. You knew who it was bound to be so you didn’t bother looking up. A throat cleared next to you but you continued packing away your items, and then you heard your first name being spoken in a low, husky voice. This time you did look up - it would be rude not to - and yup, it was Handsome Asshole. A hand was proffered to you and by reflex you took it, your hand being crushed in a strong grip. “Logan Delos,” said that suave voice, “...it’s an absolute pleasure to meet you, sweetheart.”
“Sweetheart?” you scoffed, “...how original!” while thinking, oh... so this is the infamous Logan Delos, whose name you’d heard all the time in connection with the projects but never actually met before. He had a reputation of being a bit of a diva. You heard him give a deep chuckle. “Yeah, that’s me - an original. Unique, in fact I’d say.” “Well, you’re super confident, that’s for sure!” You picked up your document bag and headed for the door, saying “Nice to meet you, Mr Delos,” as you started to leave. His tall frame scooted round in front of you before you could reach it, “Oh, not so fast.... I can’t let you leave before you agree to have dinner with me.” You tried to sidestep him but he blocked your way, and then a little ‘step to the right, step to the left’ dance ensued. Finally, exasperated, you stood still and put your hands on your hips. “Mister Delos! Will you please let me past!” He copied your stance, “Not until you say you’ll have dinner with me. Or lunch. Or.... breakfast, if you prefer?!” wiggling his eyebrows at you. You huffed, “I don’t date business partners!” He still stood in front of you, seemingly immovable, “We’re not business partners - technically speaking. Boring Asshole is my business partner, not you.” Your mouth dropped open but before you could stop it, laughter bubbled out.
You hastily silenced it, saying, “I admit, Craig may not be the most inspiring public speaker, but he really knows his stuff,” trying to cover your somewhat indiscreet reaction and save your colleague’s honour at the same time. “But that’s beside the point, Mr Delos, because we are business partners despite what you’re trying to say.” Logan had moved slightly aside while you were speaking and you took this opportunity to brush past him, calling out, “Goodbye, Mr Delos,” with the emphasis on the goodbye as you went.
If you’d bothered to look back, you would’ve seen Logan Delos watching you go, a very determined expression on his face.
»»————————————-———- ⚜ ———————————-————-««
Juliet looked up from her laptop as Logan breezed into her lounge, tossing his car keys onto the coffee table and throwing himself onto the sofa, long legs spreading out in front of him as he did so.
“Good meeting?” she asked, seeing that his head had gone back onto the cushions and he was staring up at the ceiling. He hummed, “Good and bad. The presentation was the single most boring thing I’ve ever heard in my life, but on the other hand one of their staffers.... wow! It was like an angel came down from heaven and found her way into that conference room.” She sighed, “Logan... by all that’s holy... do not try to screw one of our business partners for god’s sake! Dad will go ballistic if you mess up our working relationship with them.” Logan looked offended, “Who says I’d mess it up?” Jules gave a big sigh and shrugged, “Me, for one. Dear brother, I love you with all my heart but you’re fucking awful at relationships. You’d just fuck her and drop her like a hot potato. Who is it that caught your roving eye this time anyway?” Logan said her name in a dreamy tone and Jules rolled her eyes heavenwards, “Oh, no, no, no!... no way, Logan. I know her, she’s a lovely person and also does a fantastic job - she’s one of their top software engineers, specialising in middleware.”
Logan smirked, “She can engineer my middleware anytime she likes.” “Oh, shut up and get your mind out of your pants, Logan. Stay away, okay?!!” He huffed, “Hey! You can’t tell me who to pursue or otherwise, Jules!” “But that’s it, right there - you’ll chase her, catch her, bang her and drop her! I really like her as well as respecting her work, so you better just be damn careful!”
Logan sighed. He loved his sister but god, she was a king-size pain in the ass sometimes.
»»————————————-———- ⚜ ———————————-————-««
A week or so later, and you’d almost forgotten about that handsome asshole at the presentation. You couldn’t deny that he’d popped in and out of your thoughts since, but you’d googled him the day after you’d met him and had also made some discreet enquiries amongst those colleagues who’d worked with him before on projects. What you’d discovered had not endeared him to you.
He was a world-class player, that was obvious - and not fussy about which gender he played around with either. Not that that put you off, it was just the sheer volume of men and women he was pictured out on the town with. And alcohol and substance abuse had been there in the mix too, with some stays in rehab mentioned although the last one had been over a year ago. So no... you’d decided you wouldn’t be entertaining any further thoughts of the undeniably attractive Mr Delos.
You turned your thoughts back to the current middleware solution you were constructing, in fact it was for Delos Corporation, involving various scenarios for their Westworld hosts. You were immersed in code and structure when your phone rang, and you saw your boss’s extension number on the caller ID. Hmmm... what could she want? She usually gave you free reign when you working on a project, catching up with you every couple of days at team meetings. Answering it, you heard her assertive voice asking you to pop along to her office and so you set off on the short walk there. You knocked on her door and heard her say ‘come in’, so in you sailed and then came to an abrupt halt. Logan Delos was sitting opposite your boss; he was half-turned towards you with a somewhat triumphant smirk on his face. Your boss indicated the chair next to Logan and you quickly sat down, wondering what this was about and why Logan looked so smug.
Your boss launched into a mini-summary of what you were currently working on, and all you could do was nod. Eventually she finished up with, “So all your current projects are for Delos.” It was a statement not a question, so you just nodded. “Mr Delos here...” she levelled a hand towards Logan, “....has come up with a suggestion, and I happen to think it’s a good one.” She smiled at Logan, before looking back at you and continuing, “He thought it would be beneficial to have the person working on most of his projects - that’s you, just to clarify - to be based at Delos Destinations for the next three months, to facilitate progress.” You knew you were looking completely dumbfounded as she hurried on, “Obviously I’d like your input on this, but I’m sure you can see that it’d be very helpful for you to be on-site with our partners while you’re working through the projects?” Meanwhile you were desperately trying to come up with reasons to remain in your own office, but truthfully you couldn’t. It would be helpful to have instant access to their engineers when you needed an answer on something, you couldn’t deny that. Reluctantly you nodded, “Yes...I can appreciate that. But couldn’t we just have me spend maybe one or two days a week over there rather than be actually based in their offices?”
Logan spoke for the first time, his expression business-like now, “That wouldn’t really fulfill the brief though, would it? Because we’d be back to having a slight delay in receiving and giving responses for the time you weren’t at our offices. And I’d ... we’d... make you very welcome. There’s an office waiting for you... right next to mine.” He couldn’t stop that smirk reappearing as he finished speaking. You forced a smile, “Well, I can’t really refuse an offer like that, can I Mr Delos?” You looked back to your boss, “I guess that’s agreed then. When does this take effect?” Your boss beamed at you, “Excellent! I don’t see any reason for it not to commence immediately, do you? How about as of tomorrow?”
»»————————————-———- ⚜ ———————————-————-««
Logan walked onto his office the next morning, whistling a happy little tune. He’d had a small glass of wine the night before at Juliet’s place when he’d dropped in on his way home, knowing he had to break the news to her that evening about the cunning plan he’d come up with. He was happy for two reasons; firstly, visiting Jules and his niece Emily and not having to see William’s stupid damn face any longer would never get old, and secondly, his little scheme to get closer to that gorgeous woman was coming together. As Jules worked partly from home and partly at the office, he had to let her know that a new face would be around for at least the next three months. It would give him a much better chance to persuade her to go out with him - she wouldn’t really be able to escape him given that she’d be right next door to him every day. Predictably, Juliet had issued a stern warning about what would happen to certain parts of his anatomy should he overstep, but had reluctantly accepted that it was a fait accompli. (Privately, she was looking forward to working more closely with her and also warning her about the usual antics of her beloved brother, that’s if she wasn’t already well aware of them).
He’d been racking his brains for ideas on how best to pursue her ever since she’d turned him down flat at that conference. Logan wasn’t used to being turned down. He’d had a brainwave a couple of days later and had checked into who was handling the Delos projects at her company - after all, surely she wouldn’t be at the conference in the first place if she wasn’t involved somehow? He’d been overjoyed to find out that she was handling just about all of the current open projects (so why on earth had they allowed Boring Asshole to give the majority of the presentation?! he’d thought incredulously) and had then begun to put together a plan to somehow get her into his close orbit. He was really quite proud of what he’d come up with.
His secretary knocked on his doorframe and announced that his visitor had arrived. A big smile appeared on Logan’s face.
Here I go! he thought, the thrill of the chase coursing through his veins.
»»————————————-———- ⚜ ———————————-————-««
The secretary smiled at you over her shoulder as she leaned against Logan’s office doorframe, “Please, go right in,” before stepping aside so you could enter.
The man himself was lounging back in his fancy office chair, which to you looked more like the type of padded seat you’d get on a private jet, waving you into the office before getting up and striding over to you. He held out his hand which you took but instead of shaking it as you expected, he pulled you towards him and kissed your cheek very softly. A waft of delicious and no doubt expensive cologne reached your nostrils before he stepped back, “Welcome on board!” he said, “...I’m so glad you’re joining us here at Delos Destinations.” You smiled, “Thank you, Mr Delos.” “Logan!” he said immediately, waving his hand and saying your first name. “Logan,” you said dutifully, “yes, thank you for the welcome ....of course I do still work for my own company.” He smiled at you, still holding onto your hand and beginning to lead you to the door, “Well, for now you do. I’ve a mind to steal you away for myself, you know. Or, sorry... for Delos Destinations, I should of course say.”
OK... seems like he’s still interested, even if that wouldn’t last longer than a heartbeat once you’d gone out (and especially if you slept) with him. You knew this secondment was going to be trouble, you thought. Three whole months of trying to resist Mr Player of the Decade. But you were convinced that you could do it.
As he lead you from his office to what was going to be yours, you were suddenly very aware of his tall figure beside you, your hand in his (he still hadn’t let go of it) and a hint of that beautiful cologne of his again. He looked across at you, dark eyes gazing into yours and gave you a mischievous grin. Annoyingly, your stomach did a little flip.
Yeah, really convinced.
»»————————————-———- ⚜ ———————————-————-««
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(Not my GIF - credit to owner)
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manchesterau · 4 years ago
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my thoughts after reading my policeman: SPOILERSS of course!! (ignore spelling or grammar mistakes) (this is very ramble-y and not as in depth as it could have been sorrryyy lol, if you want specifics send me an ask after reading this)
okay...so i read the book in 3 days....which....im very proud of myself bc it takes me so long to finish books but that’s not why you are reading this.
im not going to lie to you...i liked the book. i love angst, and this had plenty of it and i liked it. if you like books such as: harry potter, six of crows, red queen, red white and royal blue you will not like this book. i know many people found it boring, which yeah i can see that, but i didn't find it boring at all. but mostly because i love boring books but that's beside the point. 
the book flowed easily, there isn't a bunch of raunchy sex scenes that ive seen people say it has (i...the things ive read idk what book they even read????) and Tom does has backward views on marriage and what it means to be a wife. but he is not overtly sexist or misogynist or abusive, or subvertly those things either. to be frank he's a scared gay man in the 50s trying to not get caught and thrown in jail. that's literally it. (ill go more into detail on him later). but if you want to read this book i recommend you go in knowing that there will be homophobia (the word queer is used as a slur....3 times or 4 but no more than 5), expect outing, expect not supportive characters, and remember to have some compassion (more on this later).
next i want to go into characters: starting with tom, then Marion, then Patrick, and then the other characters. so if you are planning on reading this book or just dont want to be spoiled them....don't read the next bit.
Tom:
I'm going to get this out of the way.........Tom (who we never get to know outside of the two-point of views we are presented with, and who is being played by Harry) is a police officer in the 50s UK. to be frank when the rumors first went around I was mad like a lot of people were, which is funny because when we got those pictures of harry reading the book before all the speculation we were....happy, that he was reading a book about a gay man. now...I don't care honestly. I could call out the hypocrites (i won't) and honestly I'm hypocritical myself. I use to watch shows like svu (if you were to turn it on right now I wouldn't turn it off) and I enjoyed watching svu. I know and have seen a lot of mutuals, people on my dash enjoy cop shows like b99, or who like actors who have played the character of police before. so it would be hypocritical of me to be mad at him (this is just my single black opinion) and then go and turn on svu (which I don't do anymore). 
I'm not saying that no one can be mad, I'm not saying that the anger people have at him playing this role is bad or not needed or valid. all I'm saying is.....is that I don't care. I got angry over this months ago, and all that anger I felt I don't have anymore, and I can't tell you why. Harry is playing an abusive demented husband who traps his wife in a simulation, and then he will play a gay policeman trying not to face persecution..........and that's that. nothing I can say will reach him, he's playing these roles and there is nothing I can do. will I watch them (pirating of course) yes.
anyways let's get back to tom's character (do not use my opinion to silence other black people I will find you....don't do that shit weirdo): tom is......tom?? like I literally was expecting the worst when I read this because of what other people had to say. but as I'm reading him through the eyes of Marion (his wife) and through the eyes of Patrick (his...true love, fuck the 50s I hate the 50s) one word came to mind constantly: scared. Tom is very scared that he will be found out and his life will be ruined. His family knows about him, which is why I think his father (more on him later) pushed him to be in the national service (where he was a cook, which disappointed him). you don't realize his family knows and then his sister says something and then you go 'wait....THEY KNEW???' and then you will go 'oh so that's why-' 
tom does have old fashion views that you would expect of any man at that time (gay or not it's the 50s and gay men are still capable of saying sexist shit). when asked by Patrick if women should still work after having a kid he said no it's the men's job to provide, Marion said she would like to keep working, he said no when they do have a baby (they literally never did, and idk why he thought he could be intimate with her for that long to produce a baby lol). that's....the most sexist thing he said in the whole book (there maybe some small things im forgetting but nothing that really stood out). that's it. I know it's not small and that was a legitimate issue in the 50s but yeah. Just in case you were apprehensive about Tom's character being a raging woman-hater, no,....he just wasn't a true feminist yet (???? I don't know that's like..the most this book says about an issue women were facing at this time). It's still bad what he said (you'll see how Marion justifies it in the book and both Patrick and her don't agree and try and challenge him on his view).
i dont want to go too in depth but it is very obvious from the beginning he has no and i mean ZEROOOO interest in her at all (you can tell when it hits him that he needs a wife and he starts to act a littleee different but it's not romantic at alll). 
i feel like my review on tom is shit but like!! we don't really get to know him without bias from Patrick and Marion. I think Harry will play a wonderful Tom (even tho he doesn't not fit the description for Tom...at all....like at alllll).
To summarize Tom: very scared gay man from the 50s who is trying to do everything he can to not be found out. his family knows, even he knew at a young age, and yes he does quit being a police officer but it doesn't happen as soon as id like but then again he wasn't one for that long if you pay attention to the years.
Marion:
😑 
i just...if yall could see the notes i made on her.....
To summarize Marion: SHE IS LIVING IN LALA LAND, TOM LITERALLY SHOWS HER NO ROMANTIC INTEREST AT ALLL, AND WHEN SHE METS PATRICK FOR THE FIRST TIME SHE FREAKING NOTICES THAT HE'S ALL BLUSH-Y AND SHIT LIKE...GIRL.....
this is a note i wrote that sums up her and tom's relationship (which is more like friends then anything romantic i mean god their honeymoon was horrible and he proposed to her....nvm 😑)
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listen...i can't lie and say i didn't feel sorry for her up until the end when she (spoilers: she outs patrick to his employer which ends up with him getting arrested). after that...ive never hated a character more in my fucking LIFEEEE like oh my god i was pissed
all she does is have fantasies about him being romantic with her (holding hands, hugging, etc) and none of them come true...BECAUSE HES GAYYYYYY i really....the author could have done a better job because there were so many damn red flags.
she's fucking annoying and whiny and yeah it sucked to be a woman in the 50s but you literally outed someone your husband was in love with and thought that you could just go back to being married like he's not devastated and instead of telling what you did you stayed unhappy and made your husband thing that at any point they were coming for him too.......*****
Patrick:
PATRICKKKKK
Patrick and tom deserved a fighting fucking chance i hate the fuck 50s fuck you 50s!!!! I absolutely LOVEDDD his pov and seeing Tom through his pov like it was just so damn refreshing seeing the world through his eyes and how he navigates his queerness in the society they live in. (the dichotomy between a proud gay man and a scared maybe proud but fear overrules that (talking about Tom here) gay man).
There was a lot more to say on how gay men were being persecuted at this time than how women were treated in this particular book. There were some little things here and there about what was expected of Marion as a wife and of a girl/woman at that time but it wasn't the focus.
I loved seeing the way Patrick navigated through his world of art and creativity. And how Tom seemed to fit right in with him.
I hate the things the author made Patrick go through (outed, sent to prison, stripped of his job, and later on in the present day he has had 2 strokes in his 70s). it felt a bit much but it's not too distracting (Patricks pov takes place in the past as he writes in his journal). 
Patrick and Julia (more on her later) are my two favorites in the whole book (Tom is third bc he's a very multi-facted character, Marion is not even on the list) and I wish we got a lot more of Patrick's pov.
Other characters!! (speed round bc this is wayyy too long):
Syvlie (Tom's sister): SYVLIEEE IM MAD AT YOUU I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WHYY WHYYY
Julia: JULIAAAAA QUEEENNN (you'll see why i love her at the end) 
Tom's parents: his father is abusive point-blank. or at least i think he's abusive (verbally). as im writing this i am now realizing that the way Tom's mom reacts to him (sometimes crying) is bc they knew he was gay omg wow.
tom's dad is very much a man's man guy?? Picture a sexist man from the 50s....now picture him with a gay son.....yeah, I'm not surprised Tom went into national service then to the police force. you can tell he didn't want anyone to find out about Tom so he pushed him to do what he thought best and Tom went with it, scared. 
overall: please do not go into this book expected things to be all flowers and rainbows...this is a book about two gay men in the 50s yall.....
there is something to be said about the tragedy that is in a lot of queer stories, I'm more interested in how white these stories are (that's a rant for another time). but I don't mind my policeman, and i think stories like this should be told. because this actually happened (here is a link to em forster's story where the author takes inspiration from, he really had an affair with a policeman!!! who had a wife!!!).
the ending is bittersweet, and i couldn't help but curse for what could have been. Marion could have not outed Patrick (which she instantly regretted), she could have gotten a divorce (she even contemplated it), they could have been more secretive, Julia could have not said what she said. I think Patrick and Tom were sadly doomed from the start, I just wish they had more time together because I loved seeing their love (the little glimpse we got) bloom into something bigger than them.
thank you for reading!! here are random screenshots of my notes as i read this lol enjoy!!
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135 notes · View notes
rhaenyraisadyke · 3 years ago
Text
A Year Later Transcript: 8/3/21
Here it all is on a google doc if that is easier to read!
W: “I heard there was a special place.. Where men could go and emancipate.. The brutality and the tyranny of their rulers…” Do you know that one Ranboo?
R: I have I have I have, I’ve heard that one a few times, I had a friend that sings that one quite a lot.
W: Yeah it's great, I- I personally, I am a big big fan of the song and not just because I wrote it, I know, I know they saw aww yeah they say you are your own worst critic, but I mean, I think it's good. Do you know what it's based on?
R: Mhm mhm
W: Obviously it's based on hallelujah, but the thing is Ranboo, right is the reason we did it is because Tommy used to sing hallelujah to the plants around the thing... the caravan! Do you remember the caravan? You have heard of the caravan right?
R: Yeah, yeah I’ve heard of it and seen the re-creation of it at the museum, but that's really it.
W: Actually can we go see it? Let's go see it quickly!
R: Yeah, sure.
W: So, so, he used to plant the stuff around the caravan, and it made it grow better, he hehe used to ha, my man Tommy, what is this? This is new.. I won’t ask questions…
R: I- Someone planted a lot of beats here and I don’t know why
W: OH, okay I quite like it, it looks really nice, it looks nicer than the target that used to be here. Um
R: Yeah
W: So my man Tommy used to sing to the plants to make them grow better um and that was the song he used to sing so I thought what a better way to honor tommy, one of the most loyal members of our fair nation then to name the song after him and base the song after his little muse. Tommy is all of our muse really, I'd say. So here's the museum.
R: Yeah, Yeah
W: I haven't been to the museum, wait las- that's where I met you Ranboo right?
R: Oh yeah yeah, that's where you saw me next to the um poster of myself… I don't know why that's still up, I kinda put that there and it preceded to stay there, is it still set up? Oh, oh no.
W: It’s not still up anymore it was here, it was right here on this wall. I quite liked it, but I guess not enough for it to be history though.
R: I’m not historical yet apparently.
W: So yeah in here, in here where the declaration of independence would sit on the wall here, it was actually quite, quite a nice van, not quite as nice as yours, I quite liked what you were doing with yours. Have you been working on it since I’ve been gone?
R: Yeah I’ve been working on it. I added a nice little table outside and did some pathways and appropriately themed flowers.
W: Thats nice
R: Yeah!
W: Let's go to Lmanburg or what was lmanburg, last time I saw it was a big glass thing.
R: Yeah I think it goes by Lmanhole now apparently.
W: Ahh ehh, that's kind of rude, it's kind of rude to Lmanburgs history you know?
R: mhm
W: It’s called Lmanburg, it's called Lmanburg. NOT Manberg NOT Lcrater or whatever, Lmanhole I don’t care it's now Lmanburg it's always Lmanburg. It’s just how it goes.
R: Okay
W: Yeah so that's why the song exists as it is. Oh there's no glass.
R: Yeah! Yeah I mean it seems to have changed a little bit.
W: YOOOO I actually didn’t know this was here
R: Yeah! It’s even got the flag down there at the bottom
W: It’s got the flag man! Can we go down and see the flag? Cmon Cmon lets go
R: Yeah yeah wait you alright?
W: I’m like a lemming I don’t care I’m just gonna jump
R: Oh well okay… careful!
W: Look at this dude!
R: Yeahh
W: Oh wow I really went down to bedrock didn't I? Holy Shit.. I did a number on this place. This is amazing!! Ahhh This is what it deserved, not the glass bullshit, this is what it needed, this like beautiful overgrowing, it feels like it happened, it doesn't feel like a monument, it feels like nature has claimed it back,
R: The book has kind of closed in that sense
W: Yeah.. we’ve got, look they have got they rebuilt the lake man! And this used to be a real river about here into Lmanburg- wait, Ranboo do you see that is that Tubbo?
R: Yeah… that's Tubbo
W: Aye Tubbo!
T: “I heard there was a special place where men could go and emancipate…”
W: Tubbo?
T: “ the tyranny” - oh?
W: Tubbo!
T: Hello?
W: Haha! You’ve came, I- I havent seen you dude in FUCKING ages! Tubbo, are you singing the song?
T: Yeah… Yeahhh?
W: Are you? Are you singing the thing?
T: Yeah hello?
W: Hold on I’m coming im coming im coming man
T: Where are you?
W: Hold on, I'm coming around, here I come, Tubbo man! I haven't seen you in ages!
T: H-H..Hello.. Wilbur..
W: I’m coming around man!
T: Yeah aha…
W: Bro! Its-
T: Weird seeing you here.
W: What in Lmanburg? That seems like the most normal place to see me.
T: Uhh yeah I suppose so
W: Well I- dude I don’t even know what to say to you man, it's like looking in a little mirror, you are even still wearing my suit still?
T: Yeahh
W: How long have you been wearing that?
T: Oh I just put it on for today, I just for it's been a year now…
W: Well you look good in it! Ranboo have you met Tubbo?
R: Yeah! Well I’ve I’ve met him, I mean we’ve um… been around yeah
W: Well Tubbo I’m really happy to see you man, dude
T: Ah, well thank you.
W: Do you even know what happened? Since,
T: What do you mean what's happened?
W: I saw you briefly man when I was resurrected, I remember you SUPER SUPER briefly but this is the first time we have actually gotten to speak, I- I will admit I was a little overwhelmed during that whole thing. I was running across the glass, thank god it's gone, this is far more adpt, but I was running across the glass, I’m sorry I wasn't you know, entirely on the same page, but I promise you I’ve calmed down I’m all settled in, I understand what's changed, what's happened whos new, whos old whos still about who uh…. Who trusts me and stuff
T: Did they fill you in on the story? Like what happened here after you died?
W: Yeah, they did, I’m gonna be honest with you it's not a pretty one, I kind of left a bit of a ripple. If I was a rock, dropped in a lake, I’m a pretty big rock
T: You- yeah’
W: And I can’t say I’m not- I’m not flattered. I mean I am flattered, I’m not TOO upset about it, I like being the big ripple, but more than anything, I want to say super simple man. I want to say. I want to say I’m sorry
T: Awe
W: For one thing mainly, I’ve been thinking about this for years, LITERAL years. I’m sorry for making you president specifically before blowing it up and I’m sorry for when I did this and blew all this up and making this hole,
T: Well I mean-
W: and making you president of a crater and i'm sorry. I’m really really sorry. I really am
T: I mean this wasnt all you Wilbur….
W: We’ll get to that, do you? Do you forgive me?
T: Yeah, I do forgive you
W: Man, ahhh my little treasury, secretary treasury, do you remember that?
T: Yeah yeah I remember that. Secretary to treasury
W: Ranboo he was the secretary to treasury and then he was president
R: Yeah
W: And then he was president
T: Yeah I’m pretty sure the treasury was like somewhere there.
W: So what were you saying about me not being the one there who blew it up?
T: Well I mean you definitely blew it up. I feel like you’re missing some vital information.
W: Wait, so you rebuilt it? How long -how long did it stand before this happened?
T: Yeah so, me, and mainly ghostbur honestly like
W: ….ghostbur….
T: He- put so much effort into making it right again.
W: Is he this obsidian crap I take it and these uh? Fucking lanterns
T: You know dream?
W: Yeah I know Dream- I love him. Dream’s Dreams
T: Oh..
W: Dreams probably my favorite person, sorry Ranboo i mean uh no contest here, Dreams probably my favorite person he saved me
T: Oh.. Oh..
W: He saved me he brought me back to life
T: Well um yeah I mean he was powerful I guess but um Techno and Philza yeah um
W: Techno and Phil blew this up?
T: They built this big obsidian contraption overnight… I couldn’t even see it coming. And they rained TNT for days.
W: nhh
R: Yeah…
W: And that's.. Wait hold on, why would Techno and Phil do this? Why would Techno and Phil blow up Lmanburg? Didn’t they live here? I mean I don’t know about Techno…
T: Techno and Phil, they hated the government, it was partially my fault as well…
W: But you didn’t blow it up
T: No, I didn't. I never wished for anything to happen like this.
W: So it was just Techno and Phil?
T: Y-y yes..
W: Sorry that's kind of just hit my not the blowing up part- You know I’ve done that,
T: Yeah
W: I’m not shaken up about that. I’m shaken up about man, is that, you rebuilt this! After I was gone
T: I can’t take all the credit obviously but there was a big effort
W: That fucking ghost- who cares man YOU rebuilt this! Bro, you
T: Yeah I suppose
W: MY fucking grave! I was so pressed about not having a grave, screw a grave I built something that you loved that YOU wanted to preserve… thats,
T: Yeah, I really honestly…
W: Tubbo that's worth more to me than a grave. That's worth more to me than this shrine. That's worth more to me then- Tubbo this is probably the best gift I have ever been given, this knowledge that people actually cared enough, that you cared enough to rebuild this community after it fell.
T: Ahh, I’m glad you’re happy.
W: You… haha, sorry, aww man, Tubbo thank you.
T: It’s alright, I just feel lost without Lmanburg. All my core beliefs.. Everything died with it.
W: You feel lost without Lmanburg
T: I have no purpose.. Anymore.
W: I guess that's where anarchy fails… Tubbo, I have a little, a little thing coming. Not big, nothing much yet, ehh, it's not a big deal you know, it's a little burger van at the moment but I got plans, big plans. Tubbo it's called paradise
T: Paradise.
W: Yeah, yeah will, would you like to come join me in paradise? Literally?
T: Hmmmm, Id, I’m not sure Wilbur, I’m not sure I trust you man. In order to follow someone I need to trust them.
W: Wait… wait- but I thought you forgave me!
T: Yeah Wilbur I forgive you because I like to hang onto the hope that people change but, I don’t trust you yet Wilbur.
W: Okay… Taboo. I literally was dead for thirteen years. I know it wasn't long for you, I know it was only a couple months for you but thirteen years Tubbo… Thirteen years of my life. I am old! Look at me! I’m not the same young man you knew. I-I’ve been through it and in those years, I’ve learned Tubbo, i wasn't just sat twiddling my thumbs just going “oooh this is nice ohhh i'm in darkness right now” you know I was thinking. I relived that explosion in my head so many times man, and I get that you don’t trust me, I do but like man! Look at me bro, I’m not gonna do it again, I’m not gonna hurt you again. I’m not gonna you know… I know you, you had the festival with Technoblade, I never spoke properly to you about this.
T: mm
W: I could have saved you…
T: But you didn’t
W: I- Tubbo… I’m reaching out to you man, I’m on my knees.. I, I’m sorry. I’m really really sorry and I literally, your forgiveness means so much to me but it doesnt give up what I did to you and it doesnt give up how I failed you as a friend, you know eh, fuck being as a coworker but just you know anything… Ranboo you might know or have known all of this and I’m really sorry if this was your first of hearing I can explain later on but like..
R: Alright………
W: Tubbo, man, I’m, I want to make it up to you. And you know what? I appreciate you don’t trust me. I do.
T: Wilbur in order for you to gain my trust back you have to prove it first. I can’t just give it out anymore. I used to be able to, but I just, I just can’t.
W: Tubbo… I really appreciate it, and I mean that genuinely. I appreciate it and I am gonna go out and prove to you I’m worth being trusted again. I promise.
T: Okay…
W: I’ll do it. I’ll do it. I’ll redeem myself and you'll.. Youll
T: Do you know I still have dreams right? Of the explosion… And, and of the fireworks. And all of it. I vividly see all of it every day. It HURTS. It hurts Wilbur a lot.
W: I- Tubbo, Tubbo, I know, I know, Tubbo, Tubbo, Tubbo Tubbo, please, I know…. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I- arhh It feels like sorry is such a weak word. I feel like there's nothing stronger that I can say, and I understand what you mean about how my actions need to reflect it and they will. Give me time. I’m gonna make something. I'm gonna make something of this and I’m gonna…
Uhhhh
Tubbo do you know how fucking strong you are? And I’m not trying to say - I’ve got your forgiveness, but I know I need to earn your trust but man… you're so strong man, genuinely. Just the fact you proved to me that just there that you have these memories and these nightmares, you still found it in your heart to forgive me, that's... You’re a fucking champion man. You’re a hero.
Look I get you don’t want to join me in paradise. We won’t talk about that anymore but, cmon, at least come and see, come and at least see what me and Ranboo have been doing! Look I don’t know- Ranboo are you? Are you and Tubbo friends? Are you and Tubbo like good friends?
R: Yeah, yeah I’d say so.
W: Then why don't you and him come and see what I’ve made! Come and see what I’ve got going on! Lets go lets go!
T: I think.. I think I’m gonna stay here, Wilbur. I think I’m fine, just to stay here.
W: No, no man, no worries. Look at me bro look at me bro! Chin up! Look, lucky rabbit's foot!
T: Okay…
W: Tommy gave it to me
T: Lucky Rabbit's foot…
W: Lucky Rabbit's foot man, chin up. Ranboo, I’ll, you can come, it's cool.
R: I will, I will. Do you need me to stay here?
T: No.. *sniffles* I’d like to be left alone please
R: Oh… you sure? I mean.. I can stay…
T: Yes. I’m fine
R:You sure? Okay...
W: Ranboo! Let's go man.
R: Yep! Lets- lets go
W: Cya tubbo! I’ll send a letter!
T: Uhuh
W: Comeon Ranboo
R: Alright
W: Ah man! It’s its I mean I I was gonna say this is hard, but obviously it's hard, I’ve -
R: It is, it is
W: It's difficult man and I’ve been you know it's gonna get better and it's gonna be worth it when I see them smiling.
R: Yeah, yeah
W: Tubbo, Jack, Niki, Tommy, anyone… Do you know who the original Lmanburg group were? Do you know who we were?
R: Ah, uhh I think most of them yeah, I think it was you, Jack, Niki, Fundy I believe as well
W: Fundy was after, Fundy was a bit after we got independence
R: mhm yeah I don’t really. I don’t really know much of lmanburg history
W: That’s alright you’ve got it down, it's correct. It’s that group and we um yeah we fought against Dream and we managed to succeed and we created a life process. Ranboo I’m gonna tell you something I’ve never really told anyone, I try and keep this on the low because I don’t want uh people to use it against me is the main problem. I didn’t even tell Tommy. I- I lied to Tommy I’m gonna be honest. I’ll tell him soon
R: Yeah
W: I’ll tell him I lied to him because I feel- it kind of eats away at me. I kind of- I told Tommy that I didn’t actually care about Lmanburg and that it was actually a tool for me to get and gain power and stuff but it's not true. Lmanburg was really important to me and it is still to this day. I want it, I want its history to live on, not as a stain caused by me because I basically took a bit shit on the history books. I wanna, I wanna make it feel like it was you know something that happened and it was a great thing. Think of the good times, the years and years well not years but you know the time of safety the time of fun, prosperity! We built parks, we built you know, no taxes, big walls, we had democracy! All be a slightly disjointed version of it but you know, that's how people should remember Lmanburg, that's what people think of when they think of our nation you know? And that's, and Tubbos the last connection we really have, I mean he, he said it himself, he's kind of you know… he's got nothing without it. I’ve heard of what Tommy, Tommys you know moved on and Jacks moved on and Niki’s moved on and everyones moved on at least partially… but Tubbo man, he's still……
R: Yeah he's still very strung up about it even though it's been awhile… He, he distracts himself with projects and everything which is nice but, you
W: Heh, projects
R: I mean yeah fortifications as well
W: I think he's gonna be alright
R: I hope so
W: I’m looking out for him. Anyway I want to say thank you Ranboo for you know trusting me this quick, I mean you barely know me
R: I mean, yeah
W: You barely have known me very long and you just know you’ve done all this with me and you’ve worked with me and I- I- you know I don’t I don’t know where I’d be without you here right now, man. T-Tommy’s great and all he's here and all but I don't wanna string him along too much because hes- I, when I look at him, when I look at him and he's helping me out and building things with me, I - I see the same eyes that looked at me when… when… there weren't some fun times in the ravine of Pogtopia I wasn't a very well man, and I can just see Tommy from that day…
oH!! Ranboo! This looks great man!
R: Yeah yea, I’ve made a couple of um changes to it. Added some stuff to it
W: Like I was saying though, I appreciate it, I really appreciate it.
R: Yeahh, yeah of course! Of course
W: May I ask, I know I’ve already asked this before but why do you trust me so fast? What's the…?
R: I mean I like to normally see the good in people and everything.
W: I know we’ve gone through that and you’ve made me cry just
R: Yeahhh, sorry about that, but I- I think the reason I think I know what it's like to have no one hurt or at least feel like no one trusts you.
W: Mhm
R: Um, and I- I’ve realised that if no one is with you, then how can anyone really know when you’ve redeemed yourself. So that's why I’m here
W: You wanna see the fireworks?
R: Well maybe not the fireworks but, I mean at least
W: Ceremonial
R: At least when you change er redeem yourself I think it- it's good to have someone there and it's not nice to be alone all the time so…
W: My boy! Ranboo, I knew
R: Yeah!
W: I knew I could trust you. We got the exact same mindset I’m thinking of ahh Ranboo I love what you have done with the burger van
R: Thank you, I’m glad you like it
W: I think this is going to be a beginning of a beautiful partnership,
R: Yeah!
W:beautiful friendship, and maybe when Tubbo comes we can you know have a big party and all get to know each other a bit better.
R: Yeah I can, I can talk with him I think and maybe get him to uh join hopefully
W: Yeah, don’t pressure him. He doesn't have to join, he just needs to come. I just want him to come and see our patented burgers!
R: Yeah!
W: Our burgers, our burger NFTS he needs to come and try them! Ranboo. Thank you man
R: You’re welcome, I’m glad that I could help out a little bit at least.
W: You’re a brilliant man and I'm going to go now a happy man.
R: That's good, I’m glad you’re happy.
W: Thank you Ranboo. Buh Bye. Ah, I love that guy bro!
34 notes · View notes
softykooky · 4 years ago
Text
Sanctuary : One
A/N: This is my first ever fic! I’m a new writer and I’m just starting so please go easy on me :) Also, I edited this way too quickly so forgive me if there are any grammar mistakes. Please let me know what you think and if you would like more parts! Request anything you like! 
Summary: Seoul's drug ring is sovereign of a small group fo 7 men, who have just gotten their hands on the ambassador's daughter.
Warnings: physical/emotional abuse, guns, violence, kidnapping...
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There was always something so surreal and soft about a cup of black coffee in a cafe that you have never been to, sitting across from a ghost in a booth that you have never sat in. You cradled a cup of lukewarm coffee between the palm of your hands, periodically sighing into the cold air of the room. The barista had given you a few side glances. A normal behavior though, you’ve been sitting here for a good couple hours now. There was nowhere else to go, and the cafe would give you a couple hours to think of a place to sleep for the night before inevitably walking around a park and finding a nice cozy bench. You looked outside the window.
Rain. At least it wasn’t hail. Better to go to bed drenched than in pain.
From the corner of your eye, you could see the barista approaching you, apprehensively and like she was there out of obligation. 
“Is there anything you need at all? You want me to freshen up that coffee for you?” Her name tag read Kim. 
Yes, there are a lot of things I need. No, you can’t help me with any of them.
“No, that’s alright. I’m so sorry, am I taking too long here?”, you began to pack up your bag full of nothing and made way to move out of the booth. 
“No, no, I was just checking up. Take as much time as you need.” She left you alone after, walking away with no intent to wait for your answer. People always do that. You looked outside the window again, and the rain had worsened, now slamming against the glass so intensely you felt it vibrating against the table. It was so loud. Almost loud enough so that you couldn’t hear when gunshots erupted through the door of the cafe. 
No. No. Not more of this.
Out of instinct and past reflex, you ducked down under the booth table, making yourself as small as you could. You didn’t dare to let out another breath. The other patrons of the cafe had scattered immediately, some making it out the door in a sonic sprint. Your eyes shot to the barista, who was standing there shaking uncontrollably with a strawberry smoothie nestled in her hands, eyes wide staring at the group of men who had just open fired.
“Ah boys. I was wondering when you would arrive. It’s rude to leave your guests waiting, you know.” The voice came from a man sitting in the corner of the room, still sipping on a cappuccino with his face tucked under a hat.
“Cut the shit, Mino. What happened to our shipment at the port in Gwangju?” His voice was sharp. Seething and filled with an intense hatred that could be heard from the tone alone. You would hate to be Mino right now. You looked around again, and the cafe had already been cleared out. The barista was nowhere in sight. What luck.
“I know what happened.” A different voice from the same group of men.
“You stopped it before it got on the boat. Tipped off Hyun’s crew that our goods were in transit and you, spineless as you are, gave up our protection and loyalty for a couple million that they offered you.” The man’s words seemed to silence the room. You held your breath, only watching the scene unfold before you.
The man named Mino coughed into his cup. He set it down, then idiotically tried to sprint out of the cafe and away from the grasps of a group of heavily armed men. Even you wanted to laugh. They cornered him, backs turned to where your booth was. This was your chance. You can run and they’ll never know you were here. The barista popped into your mind again. You couldn’t leave her alone.
You crawled out of your hiding space under the booth, making your way to the counter and trying to ignore the sound of Mino being beaten to a pulp that made a familiar anxiety bubble in your chest. You had to focus and not blow into a panic attack. Your advance was almost completely soundless, and the mystery men were far too preoccupied to notice you behind them. You peeked through to the counter, finding a shivering barista who still clutched a strawberry milkshake like her life depended on it. Her eyes held your gaze, tears streaming down her cheek. You mouthed for her to follow you as you turned around once again, preparing for the treacherous trek to the door.
“Mino, we could have been such good allies. Is that your price of betrayal? A million and a half?” A punch to the stomach. Uppercut to the jaw. “I would like to think we are more expensive than that, don’t you boys?” You winced, spiritually sending condolences to Mino. Sounds like he messed up real bad.
You held onto the barista’s hands behind you, slowly standing up and walking gingerly out the door with her in tow. 
Okay Y/N you’re halfway there. Just a little bit more. Quietly, you’ve done this before. 
The men turned around.
Oh fuck. 
The only thing you could think of was flinging the barista in front of you and running full speed to the door, now busted in its frame with pieces of shattered glass on the ground. “Shit. Run, Kim! Go!” You yelled in your haste, still pushing her in front of you. If it hadn’t been for the hand that had suddenly encased itself around your upper arm, you would have made it too. You were pulled back into a hard chest, sighing in relief as Kim sprinted out to the other end of the street, not looking back once. Watching her, you wished you could have done the same for your sister. Now you were going to die. But it was okay because you saved someone from the same fate,
“What the fuck is wrong with you? The gunshots didn’t scare you away?” You turned to his face. If this were a normal day, you would’ve been in awe at how handsome this stranger was. Had it not been for his increasingly tight grip on your hand and a gun in the other. You couldn’t speak. Couldn’t even breathe. You thought you had already escaped this part of your life. 
“What? Are you mute?” He squeezed your arm more, eyebrows furrowing as steam seemed to shoot out of his ears. You whimpered in pain, which seemed to soften his demeanor and loosen his grip. 
“I-I’m sorry. I couldn’t get out in time.” Tears had involuntarily made their way down your cheeks. He sighed, turning his gaze to the other men in the room who had been tensely watching. Wow. Leave it to you to get yourself tangled in a shootout with the most beautiful criminals you had ever seen in your life. 
“Whatever. Mino’s taken care of. Just take her with, she’s already heard everything. No loose ends.” The man in the middle said nonchalantly. Your face paled.
“No. No you can’t. Please, I promise I won’t say a thing. I’ll pretend it never happened.” Now it was your turn to hold onto the man, shaking in his grasp as you pleaded. You couldn’t go back to this violence. He stared at you in disinterest.
“Please, don’t take me.” You had begun to cry more intensely, feeling an impending doom over your head. It never matters what you want. What you need. The world just kept going on. The men exchanged knowing glances, restraining and dragging you to the black SUV that had been parked outside. You didn’t fight then. It was useless. This life will always drag you back. 
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When you woke up from a sleep of exhaustion, you were still in the car. Both your hands and legs had been tied with scratchy rope that dug into your bleeding skin. You looked around at the men, who were all occupied with something and chatting with each other as if they hadn’t just shot up a cafe and beaten a man to an inch of his life. You coughed to clear your throat, but were too scared to say anything else. A man with wavy black hair looked your way, almost sneering at your presence. 
“Princess is awake.” He spit out the words, making you confused. Were you so terrible even from such a short encounter? You looked down at your hands instead, staying silent. The car drove for god knows how long before it stopped in front of a house that you assumed costs more than your life. Before you could gawk anymore, the same man gripped onto your bruised forearm and dragged you out of the car. You bit your tongue at the pain, cooperating with everything. 
They seemed to fling you around like you were a ragdoll. Next thing you knew, you were being shoved down ungracefully on a chair in a white room, staring at your own reflection in the mirror you faced. For making it through a gun ambush, you looked pretty okay. The door opened to a man, a gentle smile on his face.
“Hello Y/N.” You froze, wide eyes coming up to meet his gaze.
“How do you know my name?” Your voice shook as you spoke, fear seeping into every word. He held up an ID card that you had left in your bag. 
“What a coincidence, huh? That when we took someone captive it would be the daughter of the Japanese ambassador.” The same anxiety from before bubbled up again, threatening to spill out of you. 
“I...I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 
He chuckled humorlessly, taking a seat across from you and tossing a file onto the table with your face plastered on the front.
“Says here you ran away a couple months ago right? I wonder why though...was Daddy not giving you enough weekly allowances? Didn’t get you the latest season of Saint Laurent that you wanted?” He spit the words at you as if they were poison, making you recoil back into your seat. You wouldn’t tell him the reason you ran away, but you wished it was because of something measly like Saint Laurent.
“Ah, silent treatment. Well, Ms. Y/N. I’m sure your father would reward us handsomely for the return of his beloved daughter, don’t you think?” His words made a chill shoot up your spine and tears welled in your eyes.
“No!” You screamed in his face, catching him off guard.
“Please….please don’t do that. Please don’t send me back. I’ll do anything. Anything but that.” 
Your desperation seemed to confuse him further as his frown deepened and he looked at you curiously. He seemed to be deep in thought before his expression flattened once again, cold eyes staring back into your teary ones.
“Do you know how many people would kill to be in your privileged position? The money that your family has? Do you know how fortunate you are?” He judged you, tutting as he flipped open the file to read more. You shook your head, staring down at your tied hands and trying to soothe the sharp ache in your chest.
“Yeah….so fortunate.” You laughed, refusing to meet his gaze once again. If your old life had been considered fortunate, you wouldn’t even want to know what was considered unlucky. He stayed silent, only reading up on the details of your life more. 22 years old. Black hair. Brown eyes. Daughter of the Japanese ambassador and distinguished family. Your father is a business tycoon and your mother his arm candy. One sibling; a sister. Allergic to shellfish. 
“Well, Ms. Y/N, if you are so desperate to not return to your cushy life with a silver spoon, you’ll stay here until we figure out what we should do with you.” He pulled you up from your seat and signaled you to follow him. The house you were in was almost as grand as your own, hallways spanning for what seemed to be miles. You guessed that the chandelier above you was Swarovski; you had the same one in your dining room. You felt annoyance gnawing at the back of your head. Who was he to judge you when your lifestyles were so aligned. 
“You’ll be staying in here.” The man opened a door to a large room with a queen size bed in the middle. It looked like your room back home, and you wanted to throw up. Your expression didn’t go unnoticed as the man rolled his eyes.
“My sincerest apologies if the room is not up to her highnesses’ standards.” He shoved you roughly through the doorway, making you stumble over your own shaky feet. The man turned to leave but was stopped by your meek and quivering voice.
“W-What’s your name?” You muttered, ignoring the fear you could hear in your own words.
“Not that I owe it to you or anything,” he said coldly.
“It’s Namjoon.” 
Namjoon. The name suited him. Suited his confident gait and his cold but calculating stare. You wanted to yell in his face. Tell him that you weren’t the spoiled brat princess he had made you out to be. Scream the reason why you ran away. But you couldn’t. After all your father and family have put you through, you knew how important his job was and what a high government figure he was. You couldn’t threaten that position. Your father was still your father once, and not the monster he has become. 
You collapsed on the soft bed after washing up as best you could, with no intention of sleeping. Sleeping risks having a nightmare, and your state was already fragile as it was. You turned on the bedside lamp and tucked yourself into the goose-feathered blanket, finally processing everything that had happened today. It seemed to crash like a ton of bricks, and you let out the pain on a poor, ill-fated pillow that had the unfortunate fate of being near. 
A knock sounded from the other side of the door and swung open immediately afterwards. You bolted up to a sitting position.
“Could you keep it down? I’m in the room next to you.” His words felt like a slap in the face, and you could feel another bout of tears surfacing but swallowed down to avoid being pummeled by your captor. 
“Oh”, you hiccuped, “sorry.” 
“What? Do the sheets not have high enough thread count? I’ll get someone on that”. His words were mocking and rude, and try as you did, you couldn’t stop the dry sob that forced its way out of your throat. His lips curled up into a smirk. You hated that they assumed everything about who you were. You hated being taken. You hated whoever this is that told you to be quiet.
“Taehyung! What are you doing in there?” A silver voice cut through the hallway and you halted your hysterical sobbing in anticipation and fear. Another man. One of the ones in the cafe. There had been seven of them, you weren’t sure. He looked at you and softened at your red and blotchy face.
“Did you make her cry, you brat?” He slapped Taehyung across the shoulder, making him roll his eyes. 
“I told you to go easy and look at what you did.” He seemed to be lecturing the other man like a parent figure. It would’ve made you giggle had you not been sobbing.
“H-He didn’t make me cry. I was crying before...I was being t-too loud. I’m sorry.” Wiping away the tears that had clouded over helped you see the new man. Of course, dangerously handsome and aura dripping in elegance. 
“Yeah, Jin-hyung, I was just trying to hack the cameras in the embassy but I couldn’t do it while it sounded like a funeral next door.” Taehyung huffed, rubbing the spot where he got hit. So this new guy’s name was Jin. You made a mental list in your head. So far you have figured out Namjoon, Taehyung, and Jin.
Jin approached you and gently wiped away the steady stream of tears on your face. You nearly gasped in surprise. Ever since the cafe, everyone has been so rough with you. Come to think of, it’s been so long since anyone has ever touched you with care and no intent to hurt. You flinched at the unfamiliarity, which made Jin frown before moving away. 
“Come on Tae, let’s let Y/N get some sleep.” He ushered Taehyung towards the door and closed it gently. You were alone, again. With nothing but your thoughts.
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“Y/N, you’re fucking useless. We had you to make our family look better, and you can’t even serve that simple purpose.” Your father spit the words at you, accompanied with a stinging slap across the cheek. Some days were worse than others. At least he wasn’t hitting your sister.
“God, why the fuck did the universe give me this pathetic excuse of a fucking daughter?” He kicked you in the stomach.
“All I asked was to not go out and let the press see you.”
Punch to the jaw.
“And you can’t even do one fucking thing right.”
Another kick. 
He always said the words eerily calm. That’s how you’d know he was angry. He would never yell, just said it simply and without waver as he beat you into the floor and your mother pretended not to hear from the other room. 
“I should just get rid of you now. You’d make a good whore.” His fists rained down on you. By the end of it, you laid still and let him finish taking his anger out on you. It was never worth fighting back, anyway. He would just hit you twice as hard. 
You woke up with a gasp, hands clutching onto the blanket that was held to your chest and gulping in air desperately. You had started crying in your sleep, leaving a wet stain on the pillow and your body felt sticky from sweat. This was why you avoided sleeping in the first place, but it seems you cried yourself exhausted last night and drifted away. A cough came from the open doorway, as a man peered in with a tray of food. His shocked eyes told you that he had been here before you woke up.
“Food.” He uttered. He walked closer to your bedside table and paused, taking in the scene before him. You were having a nightmare when he came in, and all he knew to do was stare at you until you woke up. He swiftly placed the tray onto the nightstand, and you flinched in response, which confused Jungkook even more. He shook it off, turning to make his way out the door. Before he could leave, though, you yelled out and asked for his name. 
“It’s Jungkook.” His eyes avoided your’s.
“Jungkook...thank you for bringing that for me.” His hands froze on the doorknob. He never expected someone like you to have manners at all, much less for the same group of people that kidnapped you off the streets. Jungkook left with no more words exchanged. 
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“Hyung...did you notice something weird about Y/N?” Jungkook fiddled with his fork as they all sat around a dining table eating breakfast. He had been feeling off all morning after Y/N, like something was gnawing at the back of his mind. 
“Who? The girl we kidnapped?” Taehyung questioned, mouth full of scrambled eggs as he insisted on shoving more in. He looked at Jungkook confusedly. 
“Yeah..she’s just jumpy. More than most. And when I went to give her food, she was having a nightmare and pleading for someone to stop.” Jungkook knew the signs. He knew what that looked like. He’s experienced it. 
Jin looked up from his newspaper and sipped a cup of black coffee. “Come to think of it, yes actually. She flinched away from me yesterday and I barely moved.” Jin didn’t give it another thought, though, returning to his newspaper crossword puzzle. 
“I dunno Kook, it’s probably nothing. Probably dreaming about someone stealing her Birkin.” The group chuckled at Yoongi’s jab lightheartedly.
“Yeah, you’re probably right”, Jungkook pushed down his suspicions. He was probably reading too much into things. Those are miniscule signs and he was in no way a profiler.
Taehyung chugged a glass of orange juice after his mouthful of eggs. “Besides, she just got snatched off the street by a bunch of strangers.” He looked at Jungkook, trying to assuage whatever he’s got his head roped up in. 
The group spent the rest of the morning laughing over breakfast and briefing over the duties they were each responsible for. More like a group of old friends rather than business partners of an underground mafia that dominated the entire Seoul drug ring. You really had no idea what you had gotten yourself into, and what being the ambassador’s daughter means for you. Namjoon would have to decide by the end of the day what the course of action is regarding your situation. Giving you back to your father would put them in his favor. They would have an in to high-level government officials. However, keeping you would give them leverage to hold over the ambassador’s head. What Namjoon didn’t know, though, was why you were so insistant on not going back. He was going to make it his goal to find out. 
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yellowangels · 4 years ago
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I wish for you: Maxwell Lord x Reader oneshot
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summary: (During the events of WW84) Reader has a crush on Maxwell and is certain they won’t act on it until he comes to them with a very strange and specific question. One that could change everything forever.
warnings: kinda spoilers! for WW84, but besides that none, fluff w just a bit of smooching and flirty Max
w/c: 1.8k
a/n: It’s Maxwell Lord’s birthday!!! I’ve had this fic in my notes for ages but didn’t think anyone would want to read it. BUT I knew I had to post something for the loml Maxwell Lord❤️ Hope you enjoy!
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Maxwell Lord was your boss. And having feelings for your boss was never acceptable and so embarrassingly cliche. You and his assistant, Emily, were close friends even before you started working for the same company, Black Gold Cooperative, so nobody was surprised to see you up on Max’s floor more than anyone else.
It had been a rough week of little productivity and Max seemed distant. Emily told you that he was shutting himself away in his office a lot more than usual and only when Alistair visited did he truly act like himself. You had noticed over the years that his soft side was reserved for very few people and you knew people glared at you when he smiled across the room after catching your eye. You knew he was just being polite though. Because he knew you. Though when your mind wandered, you let yourself hope that it was different, but your common sense would shut you down every time.
You were on his floor during your lunch break when he marched in, with a sense of confidence you hadn’t seen in a while. However much the dark circles around his bloodshot eyes and the sickly look to his face argued otherwise. His hair was slicked back messier than usual and a few strands had fallen down over his face. He had a determined gleam in his eye as he walked towards his office.
His eyes lit up when he saw you standing over Emily’s desk. She finished typing something on her computer and turned her head to him, before glancing up at you.
She stood as he stopped next to the desk, “Would you like an espresso, Mr Lord? I didn’t know you would be back at the office so soon.” She clasped her hands over her ID card and stepped around the desk.
He forced out a small smile, “Yes. That would be brilliant.”
You started to follow her, fearful of getting in the way and getting you both in trouble, when he raised his hand towards you.
“Wait.” He blurted out, “Sorry. Could you stay a minute? I need your insight on a few files your department sent to me. I’m sure Miss Reats is capable of getting a coffee without your help.” He raised his eyebrows and you watched him hesitantly.
You glanced at Emily and widened your eyes for a split second after nodding and you walked towards him. Uncomfortable at the thought of Emily leaving, you hoped that making a fool out of yourself whenever you were alone with him was in the past.
She smiled at you as she stepped out of the room. You turned to Max, but he wasn’t there. Walking closer to his office, you saw him leaning back in his chair. He rubbed his face, squeezing his eyes shut, but as soon as he felt your presence he snapped his eyes open.
“Come in. Come in.” He stood and made his way over to the sofa in the corner of the room.
He watched you hesitantly step into the room and held his hand out to you as you got closer.
“You said there were some files?” You questioned.
“Yes, but I need to talk to you about something different first,” He impatiently spoke, stepping towards you when you hesitated, “You don’t need to look so uncomfortable, you know?”
He smiled lightly and took your hand, pulling you to sit down with him.
“I’m not uncomfortable.” You defended as you both sat down.
“Maybe not, but you look it. Do I make you nervous?” He asked quietly.
“A little bit.” You looked down and smiled. He chuckled.
“It is not done intentionally.” He brushed a strand of your hair behind your ear and you looked up at him quickly. There were a few seconds of silence as you watched each other, waiting for the other to continue.
You broke the silence, “What was it you wanted to talk about?” You whispered, almost inaudibly.
He shuffled closer, lowering his voice as well, “If I told you I had the power to grant your biggest wish. Your deepest desire. Would you believe me?” He raised his eyebrows.
You frowned softly, “How?”
“There is more power in this world than you think, my dear, and I have that power. Whatever you wish will come true.” He stared sincerely into your eyes, his face inches away, “All you have to do is say it.”
You blinked a few times, “I- I don’t know what my biggest wish is.”
“Oh, but you must want something. Everyone has something they want, but believe they can never have.” He places your hand in his lap, holding it in his tightly, “I can see you are holding something back.”
You froze, “I can’t say it.”
“I assure you that whatever it is will come true,” He emphasises, “Don’t hold back. There is nothing to fear. I am not here to judge. I wouldn’t have asked you if I didn’t care about your happiness.”
You smiled softly and the hand he wasn’t holding found his face, cupping it in your hold, “And what happens afterwards,” You paused, “After the wish ends.”
“It doesn’t have to end. I suppose if you wish for a moment then it will end, but you don’t have to wish for something specific. Wish whatever your heart wants,” He smiled encouragingly, “Don’t think about it. Just wish.”
You hesitated and glanced down, you wished he would stop looking at you like you were the only person in the world.
“I guess I can’t wish for anyone to fall in love with me.” You grinned, trying to lighten the mood.
A flicker of an unrecognisable emotion crossed his face before he smiled, “Ah, I don’t think the wishing rule book allows that, no. I don’t know why you would have to wish for love. You have every man on floor 16 in love with you.”
You grimaced playfully, “The men on floor 16 aren’t really my type.”
“Well, I would hope not. They give in too easily.” He chuckled, “You know, the coffee shop is only a few blocks away, Emily will be back soon.”
You raised your eyebrows, “If you want me to make the wish, then you can just say.” You teased.
Max smirked and lowered his voice, “Make the wish.”
You leaned closer to him, so close that you could feel his breath, “I- I wish.. I wish you would kiss me.”
A gust of wind, seemingly from nowhere, blew between you. Max’s eyes widen as he realises what you said. He closes his eyes and breathes in deeply as the wish consumes his actions. He lets go of your hand and reaches up to cup your face in his hands, muttering out your name.
You frown, almost regretting your wish, when his eyes shoot open and stare into yours, before gently closing again. He leans in until his lips brush against yours and you reach out to grab his shoulder, pulling him into you. Your lips crash together, moving in perfect sync.
He strokes your cheek and kisses you so feverishly, that for a second you forget that you had tricked him into this and that he will feel nothing but resentment afterwards.
You try to pull away, feeling guilty, but he just moves closer, pressing his body against yours. He deepens the kiss and you let him. You are so lost in the kiss and it only heightens the feelings you have kept secret for so long.
When you both seem to run out of air, tangled in each other, you pull away and he leans his forehead on yours, not wanting to let go.
You blink your eyes open and bite down on your lip, emotions twisted and confused.
Max leans away so he can look at your face and he breathes out.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” You panic, trying to stand up.
He shakes his head subtly and grabs your hand as you go to leave, “No.” He grunts.
You look back at him and he looks up at you, “Don’t go.” He says, softly.
“No. I have to. I have to go. I’m pretty sure I just broke lots of wish rules and I-“
He stands up suddenly and kisses you, cutting you off.
You pull your head away, surprised, “What’s happening? I thought the wish was over.” You frown.
“It is,” He shakes his head, shocked, “I can’t believe you’d waste your wish like that.”
“What do you mean, Max?” You look down.
“I mean,” He steps closer, “all you had to do was ask. I would kiss you without a wish every time. All the time. Whenever you wanted me to.” He exclaims, leaning in and kissing your forehead lightly.
You frowned, “You’d want to kiss me?”
His eyes soften, “Yes. God. I’ve wanted to for years.”
You sigh painfully, “Wow, that wish really has done a number on you. You’re oblivious to it’s effects.” You struggle to get away.
“No. It hasn’t. I promise you that I mean every word I say.” He insists.
“But, Max, why?”
“Clearly you are the oblivious one. I am always making excuses to be around you. Surely you’ve figured out why.”
You shake your head, in denial, “But, that’s because-“
“-There’s no other reason or excuse you could present. I know that you notice me staring from across the room. And surely you knew how I felt at the office party.”
You scoffed, embarrassed, “What? When I humiliated myself by flirting with you?”
“I wouldn’t say you humiliated yourself. I was very humbled. That you’d want to flirt with me.”
“But you left. You didn’t tell me anything about how you feel.” You step back.
He frowns, “Then you and I remember that night very differently. I left, yes, but only because I got a message from Alistair’s babysitter and there was a situation I had to sort out. When I came back to the party, you found me and you took me up here. I told you how beautiful you were and you kissed me and then panicked and ran from the party. Surely you remember that.”
You blush, “No. Everyone said you never came back.”
“I did. I came back for you.” He smiles warmly.
You stare into his brown eyes trying to see any hint of lies and all you see is sincerity. You smile softly.
“Can I kiss you again?” You mumble, stepping forward.
He smirks, “Sorry. What was that? You’ll have to speak up.”
You giggle, “I said, can I kiss you?”
He pulls you into him by your waist and murmurs against your lips, “Yes. Always.”
tags: (please tell me if you don’t want to be tagged) @asta-lily @thewayofthemandalorian @mishasminion360 @perropascal @pascalscenarios @violentcosmicsymphony @thebatshitcrazyfangirl @shiny-captain-no-pants @adaodinson
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farty-city · 3 years ago
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inside bo burnham review no one asked for
i enjoy other peoples commentary and i was writing down my first thoughts anyway so here it is
inside
first song/intro song
i like the phone screen on him, very reflective of how we have had phone screens on us
“roberts been a little depressed” osnskjdnfs
they were right “daddys made you some content so open wide” hjbfafn
intro
oh my god he looks awful
but like in a cute way
maybe
healing the world with comedy (second song)
the canned and queued laugher no exactly… is it a symbol or is it just funny.. who's to say. 
it think its a good first song, establishing he knows what he is doing is kind of useless 
“the indescribable power of your comedy”
he looks like marc maron rn
i like the synthed voice and synthesizer
the jesus allusion … yeah
“i'm a special kind of white guy”
this feels like he knows how he is perceived by fans.. Make happy was too much
his fucking dancing fksjdnfksj
i think he did a good job looking manic
the lasers lmao
Side 1
Bo made a huge gamble releasing this like,,, what if you just stumbled upon it and this was ur first introduction to him..
I bet its like when i comment dumb things on instagram comments and get that rush of hehehehe
NO NOT BO DEVELOPING BILLIE EILLISH VOWELS
Also this is exactly what he wanted like,, he just wanted to make his things and not deal with the crowds so..
To think i was like finding scraps of him performing at largo and stuff and now,, so much content
life imitates art
the way he's literally what he wrote hgbkdf
there is no authenticity with cameras
suicide ?
 facetime with my mom tonight
the blue light.. Yeah
o hblue like sad
i don't know how i feel about the electric music but i guess its no different than whatever else i listen to
this is sad wow
still catchy etc
side 2
i wonder if here will be any fart jokes
that is how the world works (songs)
the huge mess and then him in a sweater
this is reminiscent of that walmart muppets
he became tim minchin with a sock puppet
the “yes… yes sir” stoppp 
jkgdsnfijwkensfosnf
qbejfnjne
nerjgnoejns
bo making a political statement and a metaphor for activism and then making it weirdly kinky
brand consultant (bit)
man bun
i have to believe he filmed it with the beard because quarantine vibes and also bc he was tired of being seen as a child
white womans instagram (song)
i did not like that intro
BO AND GLASSES THANK GOD
the daisies wow just wow
underwear
“white womans instagram” or “bo burnham becomes a girlboss”
i like that he didn't lose his cadence like the way the rhymes are you can still tell its him
i don't get the mom part sorry
is it like how people are very superficial but also very personal on their instagrams
this part was legit sad
side 3
i wonder how he felt with cameras constantly on him
Although this is the point hes trying to make
lol seinfeld moment (bit)
unpaid intern (bit and song)
“barely people somehow legal” was so smooth woW
omg he was scatting
he was a man who would scat
oh my god what great news
the react clip omg
i cant believe he did that oh my god
observation/critisism and response to the “can anyone shut the fuck up” 
and as i realized what he was doing he was like “i have this need for everything i make to have a deeper meaning” oh my god
now the question is how long will this go on?
jeffrey bezos (song)
idk its catchy
and then theres him like sleeping and talking which kind of is part of the jeff bezos song
bug eyes salamanders hehe
sexting (song)
i do believe this is just a silly song 
the earrings tho omg
sounds like post malone hbkjdsnfskj
idk its still about like intimacy in quarantine and that stuff..
the knife (bit)
i know hes copying like other youtubers but like,,, what
stuck in a room (song)
the intro is very funny and relatable
classic bo i love it 
i will say this special has been more reflective but i suppose it has to be
“look whos inside again”
i like the end too, this is all a fabrication
this is the clip where hes staring at the projection of himself from his old youtube videos which is sort of more like an ending to the “stuck in my room” song
 sorry (song)
i love the 80’s style music and its like zumba
oh this is like an apology song
“father please forgive me for i did not realise what i did, or that id live to regret it” what a catchy line
i would say this is another more “classic” bo song where its self aware and funny
“my closet it chalk full of stuff that is vaguely shitty” 
camera falling
this deserves its own bullet because its silly
i'm turning 30 (bit and song)
i remember him talking about this on a podcast and like,, damn i didn't know this also happened LOL
i really like how he did the lighting 
“stupid fucking ugly boring children”
suicide talk (1)
this is interesting i like the use of the projection
this is something that could never have happened onstage
just like with the it being projected on him
i guess it could but it would have to be done differently and probably hed have to make it funnier to make it more engaging
intermission
i just checked this is about the halfway point.. Mh
i don't wanna know (song)
“i thought it’d be over by now”
i wish this was longer but i kind of like how its just a little snippet and then the cut
video game (bit)
“i guess i’ll cry again”
“is the dude big or is the room small” lol
hm depression
 feelin like shit (song)
ohh the lighting is fun again
this is the tone shift i suppose
the feels like supalonely and the new kind of music
atl
:(
panic attack 
everything all of the time (song)
feels like brandon rogers 
i enjoy this
this feels like “welcome to youtube” grew up
“a little bit of everything all of the time”
“apathys a tragedy and boredoms a crime”
ok olivia rodrigo
finishing the special (bit)
these feel like diary entries but as standup
interesting choice
jeffery bezos (2)
Why the seaweed suit
Where did he get that
the digital space (bit)
suit up, gather what is needed, and return to the surface
damn
pirate map anfdkjfnskjd
this was so stupid (affectonate)
that funny feeling (song)
the campfire vibes 
kenny loggins
i don't get it..
is it about childhood, is it about the present?
i think its talking about the end of content? 
“the end of culture”, to quote make happy
change and not liking it 
“we were overdue, but it will be over soon”
if the second half of the special is like a panic attack this song is like a momentary pause before it gets worse
“so ive been working on this special”/breakdown 
this was .. uncomfortable and genuine which i'm sure is why he kept it
all eyes on me (song/rant)
another sad thing to watch.. damn
me trying to tell if the audio was from make happy
i think he was trying to make it as if the audio was from make happy 
this feels.. familiar
and obviously that is the point
“come on in the waters fine”
the use of autotune during the talking part... yeah
sad that he was gonna make another special… and it would have been totally different than this
i’ve decided i like the homage to make happy
It feels like hes made peace with it
the montage of him waking up and the “i think i'm done”
and then of course the ending where he's watching it over to remind us that its all fabricated
possible ending song/ “i promise to never go outside again”
ngl he looks good in the shirt with the haircut hehe
which i feel like is what he wants up to notice
and then like not think after we saw all his breakdowns
“i want to hear you tell a joke when no ones laughing in the background”
i really like the medley
Final thoughts
I want a blooper reel, but this doesn't seem like the kind of special
I also wonder if the songs will be on like apple music, but again, doesn't seem like the kind of special
I'm happy for him, he got to be honest and open and show us the sort of panicky stuff
this self aware comedy is exactly the stuff that i think will be making a comeback in the next decade.  John better be pulling up with more deconstructed comedy. 
I hope this has given him peace
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