#oh this post? yea ignore this
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inkydoc · 1 year ago
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brain is mean woe is me moodboard and a bit of incoherent rambling for this fine hour of past midnight
just... ignore me please, can't go to twitter anymore for this sort of thing :"D
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i'm definitely tired, yes, but like... this is more than that. yesterday i spent an hour crying over nothing and basically not being able to stop, and yea i may not know the reason so i say it was for nothing, but very probably mayhaps it wasn't.
spent last week at home on pto, supposedly resting but couldn't sleep much so that didn't work out well either. nor did the boy's visit tbh, brain decided to spend our precious little time together just obsessing over a new game that someone mentioned in passing. dunno why i got so obsessed, could say for no reason since i don't know, but very probably mayhaps it wasn't.
and i'm trying my best to function, but the pain in my lower back is worsening by the day again, after a brief time of just kinda okay if i don't move funny, and i don't know why. yes, could say for no reason, but very probably definitely isn't.
mostly i just keep myself occupied but that doesn't work that well nowadays. can't focus, can't not focus, can't rest, can't relax, can't do anything right, and definitely can't get myself together enough to at least ask for help, so i'm just crying again for no reason. except that it very much isn't.
things were going well for a bit... or... were they? to be honest i don't know. i spent last year descending into a very dark place one emotional rollercoaster a time, by december ending up barely being able to talk and completely paralised from guilt and depression, christmas crying over being a burden and not eating, my birthday trying to not cry but failing, january completely miserable, february trying to at least get ready to get up, march just bracing myself, april getting things working again at the office, may and june jus plain surviving, and july slipping back down so far i couldn't even start to look for a way out yet. you could say that around february/early march i had like two weeks where things were sort of okay, somewhat, just a bit, or at least stable.
and i don't know if i'm doing it again, dragging people down with me, refusing help offered, being a burden where i very much don't want to be one. i feel like everything is slipping through my fingers again (still... constantly...) and i just can't do anything because i'm tired. just completely exhausted. it feels like eight months passed from this year and i barely moved forward at all, or if i moved i took a wrong turn somewhere and ended up going around in circles.
it's always the same shit with me and it's fucking annoying and i can't solve it alone, but don't know how or where to look for help either. mostly i just wanna tell myself to stop being a little bitch and get yourself together, but that doesn't help, not from me, not from others. i know for a fact that i won't be able to move just because i'm told to move, that cost a lot for everyone to figure out.
but then what? how the fuck am i supposed to solve this shit when i don't even know what's wrong?
running into one bad news after another isn't helping either. hard to have hope when things are just happening so much you blink and you miss a once-in-a-lifetime event.
yay. cool. amazing. very nice. awesome.
fucking hell.
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stiffyck · 29 days ago
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I WISH ARO HEADCANONS WERE MORE POPULAR IN FANDOMS
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raiiny-bay · 8 months ago
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some kel sketches i'm working on
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cryptidm0ths · 1 year ago
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ariadne live doodles! text is from @/duckletranslations
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noiseemaster · 1 month ago
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meet my son his name is maunder he has br-HOLY SHIT DID ANYONE ELSE JUST SEE THAT?
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yanderespamton78 · 6 months ago
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damn it feels so good to actually have friends who i feel safe around. like to have friends who im not worried that if they find out that i like "cringe" things they wont judge me. woah!!
@angry-avaocardo @silly1xxx @gollyimsosoevil
#appreciation post for my besties✨✨#also the tags got reallylong and rambly just me complainign about the ex friend and a quick update so feell free not to read them if you#dont wanna#theres nothing of substance in there lol#ugh god my old friend the one i made the really long post about asking for advice#i probably mentioned this but i never felt safe to talk about things i like with them#oh god i would never be able to show them defrag#and i probably wouldnt even be willing to ramble about like. the arg or smth to them#id be too worried of them making fun of me#but also they had a way of making it so i hung out with them the most even tho i didnt want to#“me and friend are going to the canteen you two wanna come?”#“[with none of my input] no me and Charlie are staying here”#the only person i felt safe talking about my interests to was a friend that i made when trying to move away frrom the toxic one#a friend who they would consistently ask if i was replacing them with and was so fucking jealous of him#in fact that friend is gollyimsoevil yea that guy#hes great he likes gay addison shit so yk bestie#also they were so good at guilt tripping that now i use their guilt tripping tactics on myself to try and get myself to do things lol#and they would make fun of me so often but GOD FORBID I MAKE FUN OF THEM#they were making fun of me to another person a few /years/ ago so i made some snarky comment about them#because i was really upset by them making fun of me#and they brought it up to me like 2 months ago before we cut them off#like dude you mock and make fun of everything i do so much that ive just stopped talking and completely zoned out whenever im around you#and youre holding some snarky remark that i made when we were like 11 /because you were making fun of me/#UGH#oh ye update on that if anyone cares it went fine they seem to have moved on and are just hanging out with different people now#they havent made any attempt to contact any of us but also havent cut us off#i havent cut them off either ive just left it#i catch them giving me and the other two friends who used to be friends with them dirty looks#but i kinda just ignore it#i have like 5 friends my age who are much much much nicer than them
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green-day-dad · 10 months ago
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i miss my friend but how do i tell them i miss them without bothering/messaging them :’((
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buysomecheese · 2 years ago
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If I were Kyle I simply would’ve murdered Cartman already. At least I would no longer talk to him
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jasonntodd · 2 years ago
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.
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itsahotminuteinbetween · 5 months ago
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hey. Hey future minute. hey you mind doing something for me real quick.
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frostbite-the-bat · 8 months ago
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i hgoupe I'm The roller guy to yall
#I'm srs I need recognition for things I like#I NEED TO BE Known That I like This thing#Not famous but#I'M!! THE ENJOYUER...#I can get like that with clash around friends in general but I keep it lows#But in Tghe fandom. I'm srs I may avoid ppl if I'm like#Man pplproly see them as the Roller guy hahaha they're popular and draw Tghe guy a lot and nobody likes me and#Help me#It's so dark here#What mental illness is causing this#ITS SO COLD....#WHERE AM I... IM SHOEING NEGATIVE MENTAL ILLNESS....#I will go crazy reaches to get recognized for a Thing usually by Overworking On Fanart#But also I'm just a perfectionist also so that doesn't help either#And then oops haha adhd make me NOT feel rewarded for ANYTHING and it's ALL MISERY#At least friends are nice and love me and I feel great Showing Stuff and Them Telling me stuff#But I generally feel disliked by people#I may just be over thinking but I can't shake off the feeling that people murmur about me negatively. Oh it's the annoying lame guy bitch#I think people also don't like me because I talk too much I get personal in art posts and I talk a lot#People tend to ignore that#And idk#I have friends who love me and I love them and that means more than anyrhing#But seeing anyone get recognized for Liking Thing makes me#Seriously want to do physical harm to myself sometimes and that's not a joke#I suffer Self Bite when Stressed. I don't know how to Regulate Sometimes.#Why do you think I block so many ppl and whine abt it#I get jealous upset at nothing feeling threatened. sometimes yea ppl post genuinely triggering stuff but half the time I'm just like#HIISS. HISSSS#HiiIIISSS#I need to have my brain cleaned and changed for a better one this isn't kt
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maplesyrupsainz · 11 months ago
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙private, not a secret | MV1˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: max verstappen x wife!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au, established/secret relationship
warnings: very fluffy :))
summary: in which you and your husband like to keep things on the low so much so that none of his fans know about the family you have together
a/n: i luv this req tbh i lowkey luv writing kids in it's sooo cute im lowkey broody af atm too 😭 helllll
request!!!: Hi!! Could I request an smau with max where he has a secret family or something idk I just think it could be really cute !
fc: various blonde girls from pinterest
my masterlist
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twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, carlossainz55, and others
yourusername my beautiful life
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maxverstappen1 my girls
yourusername 💓
carlossainz55 god i look so cool
yourusername hahahhh yeaaa
carlossainz55 ???
yourusername nothing mate😄
yourbff aww i need to come see you guys
yourusername yes please omg 😧 alice said she misses her fav aunt !
only accounts that follow yourusername may see this post
messages ->
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instagram ->
maxverstappen1
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liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, and 88,928 others
maxverstappen1 beach day
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user7 omg hi y/n
user8 YES A Y/N FEATURE
user9 omg he let her out of the basement
user10 💀
danielricciardo go off
maxverstappen1 yessss!!! whatever that means
user11 lol
charles_leclerc tell y/n we want her at the next race please
maxverstappen1 she will come if the babysitter is free 👍
*comment deleted by maxverstappen1*
maxverstappen1 she said she'll think about it 🧠
user12 WHAT
user13 Urmmmmmmm did you guys see the deleted comment
user14 do max & y/n have children?
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1, and others
yourusername let's ignore max's deleted comment slip up shall we
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charles_leclerc i am sorry on his behalf y/n 🙏
yourusername hahah dont worry about it charlie
oscarpiastri get him on a time out asap
liked by yourusername
yourbff aww the world deserves to know about little alice
yourusername they will soon we're keeping her childhood safe for now
maxverstappen1 you already know she's gonna come watch her dad race soon 😎
yourbff im sure she'll find that very fun max
yourusername hahah that's what i said
maxverstappen1 😒
only accounts that follow yourusername may see this post
interview ->
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transcript (sorry if it's hard to read😭) ->
there is always going to be rumours ahout my relationship considering we keep things to ourselves, neither of us find it necessary to comment on them very often. *laughs* i've never heard anyone say i'm hiding y/n, no. we have always been private but never ever a secret and that's how it will remain for the most part
twitter ->
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instagram ->
maxverstappen1
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liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, and 1,124,293 others
maxverstappen1 a small insight into our (family) life
tagged: yourusername
view all 27,283 comments
user21 NOOOO WAYYYYY
user22 this is so so so so precious
user23 omg i feel so honoured that this is being shared with us even tho it's only a small piece of their lives ��
user24 max being a girl dad JUST MAKES SENSE
liked by yourusername
yourusername i love you!!
maxverstappen1 i love you more ❤️
user25 this is so special
charles_leclerc love you guys
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername
danielricciardo congratulations again bro you have a such a beautiful family
maxverstappen1 thank you daniel 😄
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri, and others
yourusername this account will never go public gang dont worry!! especially because im pregnant again 🤫
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oscarpiastri omg congratulations y/n
maxverstappen1 and me?
oscarpiastri oh right yea sorry max forgot, congratulations mate
danielricciardo congratulations guys 🫶
liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1
charles_leclerc so so happy for you guys
yourusername ❤️❤️❤️
yourbff 🤰 ur glowing
yourusername i heart you
maxverstappen1 you are so beautiful
yourusername stop it you im blushing
maxverstappen1 i love making you blush
yourusername i love you
maxverstappen1 i love you my girl 💗
only accounts that follow yourusername may see this post
THE END ❤️
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cryptidm0ths · 2 years ago
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the timeline of the himerus: 2 years earlier, present, and 3 years later, otherwise know as dumping a few headcanons down on a page
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housepartyprotocol · 6 months ago
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Twin
Max Verstappen x Norris!Reader
summary: Lando's twin catches the attention of a driver, a certain Dutch one
Masterlist / TipJar
ynnorris
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liked by landonorris, yourbsf, and 3,454 others
ynnorris Celebrating the end of undergraduate life with the looming threat of PhD life over me. Why me?
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landonorris because you hate yourself? because you don't want to leave school?
ynnorris say that to my face punk landonorris you know where to find me user1 are they related or ? user2 they are twins, she's studying something to do with sport at university
yourbsf i see the more incriminating photos did not make it
ynnorris excuse me, i have an image to upholds yourbsf hmmmm? landonorris hmmmmm? user3 I live for these sibling interactions
maxverstappen
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liked by landonorris, ynnorris, and 1,346,893 others
maxverstappen Nice summer break, now back to work for the second half of the season. Let's go!
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redbullracing Back to racing soon, champ!
landonorris Few things before the start of the season but yea
maxverstappen I know just ignoring it landonorris Don't you dare you're coming user4 What's going on here? user5 Spill user6 Probably a summer hangout user7 Omg where our invite
user8 no one mentioning y/n norris in the likes
landonorris WHERE!? user9 help why is he so protective
ynnorris
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liked by landonorris, yourbsf, maxverstappen and 2,975 others
ynnorris the duality of a london uni student
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yourbsf girl we look fire, when your brother hosting another party?
ynnorris not for a while landonorris with the way you behaved, never ynnorris but i was on my best behaviour landonorris hmmm? yourbsf hmmmmm? ynnorris rude kids
user10 max verstappen hiding in the likes....
user11 do you think they are dating? user12 OMg how cute would they be landonorris don't put that into the universe ynnorris omg get out of my comments twin, you have a life
maxverstappen
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liked by ynnorris, landonorris, charlesleclerc and 1,547,289 others
maxverstappen Back in the car, Ready to go to Spa. Belgium I'm coming...
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user13 lets go max!
user14 y/n norris back here..
christianhorner lets bring the pace to Spa, Max
user15 are we just collectively ignoring the middle photo
user16 i'm not, im feral user15 i bet thats from landos party user16 he had a party user15 yeah i follow his twin, she mentioned it user14 omg did he meet the queen y/n!?
f1wagnews
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liked by yourbsf and 974 others
f1wagnews Technially Y/N Norris is not a wag, however I can't neglect. As Lando Norris twin sister she has amassed a social following, and she is a unbothered icon. She is now a PhD student at King's College London in Sport Science. Smart Queen! Small rumors have been floating about her dating Max Verstappen but they are just that. For now?
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user17 can't the girl just live her life without everyone speculating something due to her likes. She likes all of Lewis Hamilton's posts but no "rumors" there
yourbsf @.ynnorris Umm girl? This you?
user18 how cute would she and max be
user19 Isn't she too young for him user18 No shes only 24 user19 how do you know that? user18 Landos twin? Same age? Thats common sense i fear
ynnorris
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liked by yourbsf, landonorris, maxverstappen and 3,529 others
ynnorris nothing beats good company in life
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yourbsf I don't have this photo, i thought friends shared
yourbsf nvm wait scrolled, whose hand is that yourbsf OMG is he the guy who ? ynnorris yes. yes he is
user20 WHO WHAT?
landonorris Y/N. I want his name
ynnorris oh hi there Lando, my dear brother, wasn't expecting to see you here landonorris answer. your. texts. ynnnorris sorry my phone is dead user21 Lando is gagged
user22 im starting to feel those max verstappen rumors
user23 max we see you lurking in the likes liked by maxverstappen user22 wha. did he just.
maxverstappen
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liked by redbullracing, ynnorris, landonorris, and 2,000,357 others
maxverstappen Qualifying today, nerves are building but I got a new charm let's see if its lucky
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redbullracing We hope it's lucky too
f1wagnews time to diving and hunting and researching
landonorris Maxy got a girl. And I don't. I'm not asking for tips however
user24 like Lando Norris needs girl help landonorris do you see a girlfriend? maxverstappen I'll arrange a intervention liked by ynnorris charlesleclerc can i help? landonorris PLEase
user25 Lando Norris subtling avoiding the truth that that may be a photo of his sister
landonorris beacuse its not yourbsf yeah.... user26 totally.... landonorris @.ynnorris HELLLO liked by ynnorris
ynnorris
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liked by landonorris, yourbsf, maxverstappen, and 4,302 others
ynnorris Belgium, my second love, thank you for the weather and the racing. Delaying my acknowledgement that I'm still in uni (working hard no doubt)
Oh, and my man xx
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yourbsf its offical?
ynnorris offically secret still but yes yourbsf when can i meet him ynnorris sooooon
landonorris we are having a discussion young lady
ynnorris im older landonorris by 2 mins, young lady is a state of mind landonorris we need to talk user27 someones in troublee.... liked by ynnorris
f1wagnews
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liked by yourbsf, ynnorris, and 4,234 others
f1wagnews Okay hear me out, Max Verstappen is dating the icon and queen Y/N Norris. Timeline? Of course. They met at Lando's summer break party and have been together since then. She went to the Belgium Grand Prix to support her brother but also, her man. I so hope I'm right.
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user28 I mean, you could be wrong
yourbsf @.ynnorris
ynnorris Damn yourbsf Plan of action?
user29 That makes so much sense omg, and how cute are they
user30 SO CUTE
ynnorris
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liked by yourbsf, landonorris, max verstappen and 3,299 others
ynnorris getting through a PhD with help from a PHD
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yourbsf photo creds where?
ynnorris my best friend ladies and gentlemen yourbsf also did NOT need that mental image landonorris preach
landonorris When am I meeting this casa nova
yourbsf I thought you already had landonorris who? who? ynnorris why? GIRL
user31 Whats a PHD?
user32 One is a doctoral degree, the other is a pretty huge, um, appendenge user31 Oh, lucky girl! liked by maxverstappen
f1wagnews Am I the only one seeing "Maxim" on the jacket. MAX.... Verstappen? maybe?
liked by ynnorris user33 CONFORMATION?!
maxverstappen
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liked by ynnorrris, landonorris, and 206,386 others
maxverstappen my lucky charm, my liefje, my Y/N
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ynnorris my darling, hard launch? before me?
maxverstappen I got sick of waiting, you’re too beautiful ynnorris I love you, tell me how
landonorris MAX WHEN YOU CATCH THESE HANDS
maxverstappen Lando do you perhaps wanna take this off social media landonorris WHEN you CATCH ynnorris run liked by maxverstappen
user34 OMG they are cute
f1wagnews I WAs RigHT, they are
user35 Max is too good for her, she just wants his money let's be realistic here. She is a broke uni student
maxverstappen She is more than that. She is the love of my life landonorris Gag, but he's got a point liked by maxverstappen and ynnorris user36 Pop off Maxy!
ynnorris
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liked by yourbsf, landonorris, maxverstappen and 4,203 others
ynnorris Cats out of the bag. To my Max, thank you for everything. I love you with my whole heart and I can't wait to watch you win races and life.
view all 530 comments
landonorris Gag. Ew. My sister ladies and gentlemen.
ynnorris you love me really landonorris thats up for debate
maxverstappen Am I asleep in that photo?
ynnorris But you're so cute landonorris Take it off socials ewwwww ynnorris no, you leave liked by maxverstappen
user37 They are adorable!
user38 No, my idol is taken noooo
ynnorris I'm sorryyyyy maxverstappen why you sorry? ynnorris shushhhhh go to sleep
yourbsf im so happy for you babes, don't forget your work tho
ynnorris nope, im totally working hard yourbsf girl ynnorris seriously, I am
f1wagnews
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liked by ynnorris, yourbsf and 3,205 others
f1wagnews Y/N Norris was seen at the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix celebrating with her partner Max Verstappen as he won another World Championship.
view all 542 comments
user39 My parents!
ynnorris My Dutch winner
f1wagnews Omg hello liked by ynnorris
(a/n okay im back, my loves! I have missed this. I will be writing at my own pace but I have many ideas and I will be working my way through them)
(taglist: @yawn-zi )
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tojisun · 5 months ago
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!! minors dni; simon x cam girl f!reader; kinda sexting; UNEDITED and RAMBLING // divider by @/plutism <3
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yall know those ‘ask me’ thingies in instagram and how theyre not anonymous? mmmprmn thinkin about simon finally giving in and sends cam girl! reader replies (he’s not tech savvy, forgive him 😔)
the questions are always fashioned the same way, he’s noticed. you only ever post those, anyway, when you’re in the middle of editing a new video but it’s taking too long so to keep your loyal viewers interested, you entertain them with little questions.
“which toy next?” you posted, showcasing four different sex toys splayed on your bed—a purple sucking vibrator, that bullet vibrator you’ve made multiple videos on, a rainbow-coloured dildo, and another one that squirts which is simon’s favourite if he’s being honest.
you always did cum the hardest when you’re being pumped full. simon wonders how much more intense would it be if you were properly fucked and filled; stuffed continuously, repeatedly, until your pussy’s all wet and sensitive. until it takes—
overtaken by his desire, he gives in and he types out his answer, “a real prick would look better in you.”
he didn’t expect you to see it, let alone for you to reply, but you did and simon reads it with a huff.
> ok troll
i’d volunteer myself, really. <
> yeah right. like i can trust you
what? you want proof that i can make you feel good? <
your reply doesn’t come in and he knows that you must want the whole interaction to end there, but simon won’t let you—doll, he’s finally managed to talk to the girl he’s been fantasizing about, did you really think he’d let the opportunity pass? you don’t even know how many times he’s fucked his fist to the videos of you bullying a dildo in your sopping cunt or the ones of you squirting while you ride that saddled vibrator that punches out guttural moans from the base of your throat.
jesus, just thinking about you mewling and creaming, your skin shimmering with your sweat, has simon chubbing up in his sweats.
so he gets bolder, changing his accounts—both this and the one he’s used to subscribe to your site—so that you know it’s him. he uploads pictures, exposing enough of himself that it feels real and authentic, and begins to tack on messages to every tips he gives.
it takes about two months until you finally caved.
> so… youre not a troll :(
why the sad face? did you want me to be? <
> course not!
> hby? what do YOU want
simon licks at his chapped lips, his legs unconsciously spreading already.
how about pics? show you what i was volunteering? <
> uh
> you wanna send a dick pic?
yeah. evens out the relationship, don’t it? after all, i just about know how your pussy looks and how it squirts. <
> youre soooo weird LOL
> but sure yea why not ig
simon snorts because try as you may, you don’t sound unbothered at all. after all, he knows you’ve been looking back at him—you followed him back in his socials, you even respond to all his tips and messages, and one time you even moaned his alias out loud during your stream. really, you’re not subtle with your own interest at all.
he pulls his sweats down and takes a pic of his half-chub. it’s a little blurry, and the angle captures more of the tuft of hair than the way his cock’s all flushed and filling-out, but simon knows what a decent dick picture looks like—they’ve all received numerous from mactavish—and this one looks good enough so he sends it to you and watches as his message goes from delivered to seen.
you don’t reply right away, nor after three minutes—he knows because the commercials ended and his game’s back on—and simon wonders if you’re back to ignoring him when—
> oh
> thats a good dick
he laughs, booming.
oh so you want it now? <
a speech bubble appears, then it disappears, then it appears again. this happens for a while and it’s somewhat entertaining to simon, mirth filling him up. then, you finally send your reply and this time simon couldn’t stop the barked out laughter that rumbles from his throat because you sent him your address.
simon’s out the door in minutes, his bike keys clutched in his fist.
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wonnielicious · 6 months ago
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forgot my toothbrush — nrk ⋆
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s you’re over at riki’s and realize you forgot your toothbrush, but he wasn’t worried g fluff lower-case intended
note - hallo guys, it’s been awhile since i posted…anything but that’s because i’m a working woman now :3 but y’all when i seen those romance : untold engene ver pics i started to go crazy ngl…NI-KI LOOKS SO BF CODED, I LOV HIM! saur to honor that i wrote this in one sitting, i hope you enjoy! pls interact [like, comment, reblog] it’s very appreciated :)
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“I MISSED YOUUUU” you shouted as you jumped onto the tall boy right as he opened the door. while stumbling back he ruffles your hair and chuckles.
“you were literally here last week nut” you stepped back and rolled your eyes at him “a week too long” you then proceeded to make your way to his room. as you walked in you threw your bag on his bed and started unpacking.
“oh yea go ahead and just throw everything on my bed” he jabbed at you with twinge of humor in his tone. you ignored him with a smile and continued to throw things on his bed.
as you were nearing the end of unpacking you realized something was missing. smacking your head at the realization you sighed out, “i’m so slow bruh”
“you’re just now realizing?” he laughed out as you smacked him.
“shut up hoe, i mean i forgot my damn toothbrush.”
he sighs and rubs the top of his nose “what would you do without me y/n” you raise your eyebrows in confusion. he goes to his bathroom and comes back with a cup with two toothbrushes. one blue and one white.
you don’t know why, but this small simple gesture made your heart flutter. trying to hide the blush on your face you threw one of your plushies at him.
“so you just assumed that i’d forget it huh?”
“no, you’re just over here so much i thought i might as well get you one. i also got you a loofah and matching pjs with me”
you smiled and went to give him a hug “thank you ki, i really appreciate it”
“anything for you nut, now how about those matching pjs”
you jumped up and shouted “YASSSS”
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