You always have such insightful posts! Thank you!
I was wondering what you thought the ten best golden wives episodes are and why
Oh, my goodness, thank you so much!! That's so sweet!! I’m really glad you enjoy reading my thoughts :)
And that's an... impossible question, oh my god. You might as well be asking me to count the stars in the sky 😂 Honestly, any episode could do -- their love for each other (whether you think it's platonic or romantic, whichever colour you want to give it) is just so woven in the way they talk, the way they move, the way they're affectionate with each other... I'm fairly sure that I could find at least one Golden Wives moment for every episode (with the possible exception of S2E26 Empty Nests, but I'm not willing to watch it again to find out).
That being said, there are some episodes that feature a specific focus on the relationship between the three of them. Through a lot of deliberation, I managed to narrow the list down to these, which you can count as my favourite 10 (in no particular order) -- under the cut, because of course I have a lot to say about them:
S1E5 The Triangle
An absolute banger. The fight between Blanche and Dorothy is harsh (they're both really hurt!!), but Rose gets to show off her abilities as she works to bring them back together (which is the literal expression she uses!!! she wants to 'get Dorothy and Blanche back together'!!!). And I mean -- that final reconciliatory hug?? The way Dorothy and Blanche look at each other?? Them yanking Rose into their hug??? Hello???? Wives behaviour????
S3E15 Dorothy's New Friend
I think my appreciation for this episode is renowned, at this point. Blanche and Rose working in tandem are adorable; I love that they do their best to warn Dorothy about Barbara, but they also try to get along with her, despite her treatment of them, because, well -- if Dorothy likes her, she can't be that bad, can she? And I love that, despite her anger and objections, Dorothy is really worried about the way Blanche and Rose feel! She says out loud that she values Barbara's friendship, and that's why she feels like she can ask her advice on someone as important to her as Blanche and Rose.
Besides, I love the casual intimacy they throw in there! This is really a constant in the show, but it's so nice when it takes the spotlight like this. When speaking about Rose's masquerade ball, Blanche says:
"Since when do we have to say we're going? We've gone for the past five years. We may hate it, but we always go."
It's so obvious that they're going, because this is important to Rose, that they don't even have to say it. You get what I mean?
S6E12 Ebbtide's Revenge
Hear me out for a minute. This is, of course, an episode centered on Sophia and her grief for the death of her son, and it's excellent at that. But let's not forget that Phil was also Dorothy's "kid brother", and while her pain may take second stage (except for her beautiful, heartbreaking eulogy) while Sophia's is in the spotlight, it's still very obviously there.
And what does she do to face the immense, unthinkable pain of losing a sibling? She turns to her wives, that's what. Rewatch this episode and pay attention to just how much Dorothy physically leans on Rose and Blanche, whether it's reaching for them, holding their hands, touching their arms and shoulders... Dorothy is always very physical with the two of them, but I feel like it's especially meaningful in this one. And, for their part, Blanche and Rose act exactly as two people with a grieving spouse would (or, at least, should) do; they support Dorothy (and Sophia) as best they can, they take care of practical things (like preparing snacks), they mostly stay out of the feud but they (especially Rose) try to offer another point of view when they think it's going to make a difference.
Also, this quote from Dorothy to Rose:
"Honey, you've been more than a help. I wouldn't have gotten through the past few days without you. I mean it."
Yeah.
S5E19 72 Hours
This is (unsurprisingly) one of my favourite episodes in the series, and it's especially good from a Golden Wives lens as well. I've been meaning to take a detailed look at this episode and examine Dorothy and Blanche's support of Rose, and how it shows a) how much they love her and b) how well they know her (which might actually be the same thing, now that I think about it). And Rose, of course, relies on them to an incredible degree; it takes her a little while, but eventually she allows herself to be openly angry and dejected, to lose her happy-go-lucky attitude with them, which is something she only does when she's at the end of her rope.
And she's right to, because they hold her up. Look at what she says when she finally gets the good news:
"You guys were terrific. Thank you for being there for me. And thank you for making me feel you'd always be there for me, no matter what happened."
I could go on, but I'd like to make a post specifically on this episode as soon as I get the time (and some brain power...), so I'll postpone any additional observations for now.
S1E22 Job Hunting
This fills the same 'niche' as 72 Hours, in that it's an episode where Rose has a serious problem and Dorothy and Blanche give her the support (both practical and emotional) she needs to get out of it. It takes a spot of its own because it's REALLY heavy on the physical affection, even by Golden Girls standards. There's LOTS of hand/arm holding, hugging, laying next to each other in bed, sitting close, plus a cheek AND a forehead kiss. It's a delightful little gem.
S2E1 End Of The Curse
The whole mink business would be enough for me to consider putting this one on the list. Dorothy and Rose working together on a silly thing like this always warms my heart; they're a delight to watch.
Of course, though, the reason why this is here is because of Blanche's situation. As always happens when one of the Girls has a problem, there's lots of physical and emotional support (Dorothy and Rose literally run after Blanche through the house to try and comfort her -- two times!!), but the real kicker is all the baby stuff!! I'm not a big fan of children, but it's impossible not to be endeared by Dorothy and Rose acting like proud moms ("the baby will have three mothers!") before the pregnancy is even confirmed, splitting up chores and bickering about the college he'll go to, while at the same time showing Blanche their unconditional support.
And -- Blanche loves them for that, of course. She goes through a lot of emotional distress in this episode, but she comes out on top, and it's because of the Girls:
"It was you girls. Yes, you just let me carry on and be crazy and you were right there through it all. [...] You were caring and supportive and I wanna thank you for it -- I'm really lucky to have friends like you."
To be honest, I like her similar speech in the pilot just a bit better, but between the two this is the episode I prefer overall (if only because their characters are well settled at this point!).
S3E3 Bringing Up Baby
This is such a comfort episode for me. First of all, we get the whole raising a baby theme again (with both Rose and Blanche going from scared/unwilling to enthusiastic participants as soon as they figure out that they're going to raise the baby together!!).
Dorothy and Blanche are all over each other, even more than usual -- they barely ever stop touching, like, hello?? Find a room, girls?? And Blanche's sheer glee at the thought of getting a Mercedes for all of them -- her "Don't you just love it? It's ours!" lives in my mind rent free!!
And then, of course, the nose kiss. I melt out of sheer adorableness every time I watch this one. The kiss itself is super cute, but it's just the whole scene -- Blanche and Dorothy getting each other's intentions with a single look, the way Blanche smiles as she leans in and then boop's Rose's nose on top of the kiss, Rose immediately dissolving into giggles, Dorothy hugging them super tight, I love them so much oh my God 😭
S2E10 Love, Rose
Do I even have to explain this one? Blanche and Dorothy writing Rose letters? Love letters (as in explicitly romantic letters!!)? Complete with poetry? And they write them so convincingly that Rose gets the biggest crush on the author of the letters?
"It was so nice. It was so important to me that someone cared about me as much as the person who wrote those letters. It meant so much to have somebody like that in my life."
"You do, Rose, honey! You have us!"
"We're the ones who wrote those letters, Rose, and we meant every word."
Are you reading this?? Are you?? Oh my God?????
S7E4 That's For Me To Know
I adore this one and I'm not sure I can explain why in just a few lines, but I'll do my best. The way the Girls handle the major conflict of the episode (the threat that they can't all live together anymore) is so so sweet. They squabble, but they apologize and reconcile quickly; they 'vote' Dorothy out and are immediately heartbroken about it; Rose decides to sacrifice her happiness and move out herself, so the other Girls can keep living together, and she's so clearly devastated about it. I've already noted down Dorothy's speech a couple of times on my blog, but I just have to share it again, because it perfectly sums up the reason why this show works so well, imho:
"I'm afraid that no one's leaving. You see, we're a family here. Well, not the conventional one, but we love each other and [...] It's real love, Mr. Benson. It's an honest love. And, yes, we might have secrets that we stubbornly try to hide from each other [...] But we're a family nonetheless, and you can't break us up."
You see? You get why I go feral over this one? And then -- AND THEN -- Blanche decides to make them co-owners. I have no words to explain how monumental this is. This is the house she lived in with her beloved George for years, and she decides to sell part of it because she can't bear the thought of separating from her Girls. "That way you'll have equity and nobody can make you leave." It's the wonderfully poetic conclusion to the beginning of their journey; they met as landlady/renters, each alone in her own way, each hurting in her own way; here they become co-owners, equal and together, each a part of a single tight-knit unit. It's the closing of a circle. You get what I mean? Oh, I love this one so so much.
S7E23-24 Home Again, Rose
I cannot be coherent about this one. I cannot be coherent about this one. It's just. I should do a play by play of literally every second of this episode to explain why I love it so much. If I had to pick a favourite, it would be this one. It's the family of it all, the fear and then the desperation and then the joy, the casual expressions of love, it's Dorothy screaming and begging for help as soon as she realizes Rose really has fainted, it's Rose asking Kirsten to take care of the Girls while she's going under for open heart surgery, it's Blanche saying that's what house mortgages are for as if it's obvious, because to her, to them, it is. Of course they're going to help Rose with everything they have. Of course they’re going to take care of her, of course they wait for her in the hospital even if they can’t see her, of course they pray for her, of course they promise to freeze their heads for her, because they love her and she loves them. Love is stored in Rose, Blanche, and Dorothy holding each other's hands as if they’re keeping each other above water. If it’s not like that, then I don’t want it. (Coincidentally, this is also one of the best episodes when it comes to the bond between Sophia and the wives. The way she greets Rose with ‘Welcome back, baby!’ when she finally returns home lives in my mind rent-free.)
I need you to know that it took me a good couple of days to compile this list. I haven't stopped thinking about it ever since I read your ask. I wrote down about five different versions before settling on this one, and so, I think I've earned the right to mention some special runner-ups:
S1E25 The Way We Met: come on. The Great Herring War? One of the best scenes in the show -- and an incredible demonstration of chemistry from the Golden Wives.
S1E8 Break In / S4E20 High Anxiety / S5E1-2 Sick And Tired / S5E11 Ebb Tide / S6E9 Mrs George Devereaux: for when you need to scratch that hurt/comfort itch.
S3E21 Larceny And Old Lace / S4E4 Yokel Hero: I'm always a slut for the times when Dorothy and Blanche need to earn Rose's forgiveness (and get it immediately, because she can't stay mad at them).
S2E21 Dorothy's Prized Pupil / S5E23 The Mangiacavallo Curse Makes A Lousy Wedding Present / S5E24 All Bets Are Off / S7E19 Journey To The Center Of Attention: all super cute, involve a conflict and a beautiful resolution, great watches. They lose a couple of points in this context because you asked specifically about Golden Wives episodes, and these highlight a couple within the Girls (Rose/Blanche, Dorothy/Blanche, Dorothy/Rose, Dorothy/Blanche again).
Thank you so much for your ask -- answering it was hard, but I had a great time going through the episodes and picking the ones that stood out! If you'd like to share your top10, I'd love to read it :)
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I'll play! 😁
4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral?
15. Do you write in the margins of your books? Dog-ear your pages? Read in the bath? Why or why not? Do you judge people who do these things? Can we still be friends?
25. What is a weird, hyper-specific detail you know about one of your characters that is completely irrelevant to the story?
27. Who is the most stressful character you’ve ever written? Why?
35. What’s your favorite writing rule to smash into smithereens?
Hello and thanks for playing!! :)
4. What's a word that makes you go absolutely feral?
I know this is meant to make me talk about words I really love, but I'm afraid what you will get instead is a little rant on the expression never mind.
Why is it made of two words. Why. It looks so nice together. Here, look: nevermind. See? Doesn't that look much nicer to you than never mind? People even say it as one word when they say it out loud. Every time I write it down as a singular word and every time the red scrungly line appears to call me an idiot, but the truth is that I'm right. It looks better as a single word and they will never silence me on this.
... Okay, I also think the English really went off with tender. Also beloved. Also fluffy. And most of all darling. The word darling is the one and only reason I'd like to have an English-speaking girlfriend, so I can call her darling. It's the pet name to end all pet names.
15. Do you write in the margins of your books? Dog-ear your pages? Read in the bath? Why or why not? Do you judge people who do these things? Can we still be friends?
I do not! I'm the type of person who leaves her books completely immaculate. The most I do is press flowers into them! I'm not sure there's a specific reason, I just never got into the habit (although it might have to do with the fact that I tend to read a lot while traveling, in bed, or generally in situations where I can't really write). If I want to analyze or highlight a passage I use an app specifically for that.
Some 10 years ago I would have judged you hard if you did any of the above 😂 but I've gotten much more reasonable over the years! Now I think that if writing in margins, dog-earing the pages, or reading in the bath brings you joy -- you should do exactly that! Reading is a personal, wonderful experience, and everyone should get to enjoy it in the way they like best.
25. What is a weird, hyper-specific detail you know about one of your characters that is completely irrelevant to the story?
Dorothy drives stick shift. I haven't been able to fit this into any of my works so far, but it's important to me that you know it.
Just to add some details: she knows how to drive an automatic car, she just learned to drive on a stick shift car and she prefers to drive stick shift. This is only because she's Italian in origin, and Italians (me included) drive stick shift. And also I think of her driving like I do, one hand on the wheel and the other on the shift, and I literally see stars, so there's that.
27. Who is the most stressful character you’ve ever written? Why?
Answered this one here.
35. What’s your favorite writing rule to smash into smithereens?
Ooh, fun! I enjoy smashing each and every rule when the time is appropriate, but I think my favourite one (if only by virtue of frequency) has got to be 'never begin a sentence with a conjunction'. This was drilled into me in school, but there's times when beginning a sentence with 'and', or with 'or', or with 'but', is simply more effective -- and effectiveness comes way above grammatical correctness in my list of writing priorities. Take that, grammar!
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synopsis. boothill wants to know how many of his fingers you can take — one? two? or three? <3
cw. metal fingers (they're cold & vibrate), fingering + clit rubbing, calls you baby, fem! reader
"no, no, no," boothill mutters underneath his drawn out exhale as his digits trace soft patterns over your achy clit, "don't buck back, baby, you're already so sensitive, aren't you?" as a grateful hum whirls against your temperate neck.
his eyes scan over your bare body— your tits showing erected nipples, your thighs so prettily soft and your ass, ugh, all for him to look at with your dress pulled up your waist.
naked, you're completely naked and it only made him delve deeper into his want, his need and the desire to crowd you with him.
it's all he wants, everything he needs.
you're so messy, so wet, just perfect. and boothill wonders how more messed up he could get you if he was to insert a finger inside. after all, currently he only rubbed on your clit, pulling on the hood of your pearl and playfully tugging it, surging warm curls into the reactive nerves as you're repeatedly bucking into his hand.
"you want a finger, hm?" he probs at your hole, his voice sounding so handsome, so desperately hot that in truth, you wanted him to fuck you right here and there, skip all of this and grace you with the thick press of his cock stretching you nicely, "just one now?" he winks smugly from behind as he pulls one finger in, leisurely, pressing back and forth to his knuckle and back.
you wince at the coldness immediately, the metal slipping within your temperate walls as you were already pretty much riding the finger. the clear contrast of hot walls and cold finger made you moan his name, moan it wetly and scream it even filthier as you arch your back, your ass rubbing back into his palm as he fingerfucks you.
"hey not yet, don't get too excited, gonna put two fingers in now," he groans quietly, kissing along your neck, rubbing your wet walls with one digit, "need to see you get excited for my cock later, you think you can take two though?" you're beyond overwhelmed by the single one, does he really believe the combination of one finger would give him such a reaction from you if not due to the fact that his digit was vibrating almost cruely.
a cold metal, spilling in and out, vibrating, the quivers and judders of strong sparks reaching all into the blood in your body, rushing through your weeping pussy as you slick him up with your wetness.
you nod eagerly, part your legs for him just a little more as he inserts the second— and this time, the stretch was already burning, a plenitude of pleasure melting into your sensitivity, riveting over your dazed mind. you felt a new sense of excitement enter your psyche, it's dangerous but you do not mind, and as you pull your head back to look at your boyfriend, you see bliss in his own expression, tented in the shadows of his eyes as he licks his lips.
in the most intimate sense, your budding cunt clenches down and shakes at the vibrations of his fingers adding an uncountable amount of new pleasure, the vibration like silent promises, promising you that they'll make you cum and cum all over his hand, right here and there, high on the sensation of the freezing steel entering you this filthily.
"you're so wet for me, oh, oh ugh," boothill bites down on your neck to hide his moans, but his fingers fuck you without pause, so lecherous with their precise thrusts entering your lust-filled body.
"it's so easy for me to just slide in, don't you feel it? you've been waiting for this, didn't you?"
"waiting for me to make you feel good,"
seeing your slick all over him so deviously decadent, made his heart skip a beat and cock hard, all the blood rushing to his erection— fuck, he's so hard and thick, his shaft pushing messily against your plush ass from under his boxers, the girth and length coaxing a thrilling shiver from your body.
"you want me to try three now?" your cunt sucks him in at his words, squelching noises buzzing over your ears in an embarrassing orchestra as you nod your head at him, loved to get stuffed on all ends, with all of him entering you.
"yeah? you want it? gotta be wide open for me, for later," abruptly, he adds the third and the stretch funnily enough— didn't feel too painful, which was due to the fact that you were already wet for him, soaking the insides of your thighs and your ass.
you're gasping, twitching, you're so hungry and bending around his fingers like you're made for him— as if boothill was always supposed to pleasure you this way. the compelling, pressuring thrusts of his digits rocking into your hole was enough for you to become overwhelmed by all the sensations happening at the same time.
sudden warmth fills your belly as you release all over his hand, the sparks of his fingers exuding the vibrations had turned stronger, harder and ruthless to the point where you could feel them attack your sweet, little clit, begging for mercy.
"ohh, yeah, just like that," he places a kiss on your neck, "let me see it, cum for me, pleaseplease," breathing heavily when he broke away to prolong your orgasm, "see? i told you baby, you could take three fingers, maybe more?"
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