#oh man i am so excited to talk about my new take with them

[mysticalskunk]

The worst part about writing this Rockoon and Doubling analyze is that I have no idea where to start because I have a LOT of thoughts since their relationship is so complex and they are both incredibly complex people and I have activated my outside the box thinking with them so hard this time that I’m just wow! No wonder I didn’t roleplay either of them well in the past!!

Not judging from my own perspective anymore and being a lot less biased is so FUN

[alongtidesoflight]

so here's my honest thoughts on dragon age: the veilguard, after ~40 hours of playing. i finished the main quest after having finished all companion quests and major faction quests. just to clear up what content i saw, i played as an elven transmasc rook who is a member of the lords of fortune. he romanced lucanis (although after finishing the game i'm now leaning towards taash). i don't know what's happening in playthroughs that have a different race, gender identity, romance or faction going on.

full spoilers ahead, i mean it. don't read further if you want to avoid them. i don't want complaining about it in my asks.

oh and also, if you're worried because of a few negative reviews online i can comfort you by saying don't give a fuck about a certain big name youtuber who is very much tied to bethesda franchises giving this a negative review. i'll explain why.

i'm starting off with the things i liked

the game looks really pretty. i was worried it wouldn't feel like thedas anymore (with them trying to "focus on northern thedas only" i thought they'd make a clear cut in environmental design. they do and they don't. it's complicated. i'll elaborate on it when talking about the negative stuff). anyway it does. minrathous feels like kirkwall. treviso enchanted me like the winter palace did. the hossberg wetlands reminded me of the hinterlands and a couple other inquisition maps. arlathan looked like... arlathan. the crossroads were different, but familiar. overall i like the way it looks and feels. it's thedas, with a twist. it's a good one, and gives everything a solid but unique feel.

combat is top tier. if you're a hardcore dragon age player you WILL miss the tactical aspect of it for a bit, but i promise you, once you're used to the way the combat works, you will be lapping that shit up. and once you get to ability combos you'll mourn the control you used to have over your companions in battle a bit less

the MAIN quest and its story. i expected worse, way worse. and for a while the game even had me tricked (harr harr you'll get it in a second) it is Really That Much Worse. but holy shit was it good. i walked away satisfied ngl.

your choices have SOLID weight. there's consequences, good AND bad. i got minrathous blighted, ruled over by venatori, and the leader of the shadow dragons ultimately died because of my decisions. i made those at the beginning and throughout the game. he died at the end. DAVRIN died because i didn't expect what i was saying to have that much weight. i thought i was in the clear. he had hero status. well turns out, your choices can still get your companions killed even if you do everything right. i fucking love him. he shouldn't have made that sacrifice just because i told him to do everything it takes once.

the inquisitor, morrigan and dorian being there, surprisingly. there's also negatives to this though, see below.

speaking of companions dying and the inquisitor playing a bigger role: the final quest feels like me2's suicide mission. i was blown away by it and the fact that i got to see the results of all my efforts playing out in front of me.

bioware are NOT trying to redeem solas. they love him as a character yes, but i wasn't forced to see any good in him. he betrays you. he fucked my rook over twice. he fucked him over right back, for good this time (the veil wasn't torn down, i anchored it by binding him to it, he's doomed to uphold it). but solas really lives up to his name as the trickster elven god. rip to all the people who grew really attached to him over the years.

varric died. if you like him that's probably as hard reading it as it was watching it. varric died and the game lies about it until the very end. when the realisation hits, it hurts. but in the very best way.

the amount of care they put into gender expression and trans identities this time around. (i'll add onto this with negative points as well too).

rook feels very much ingrained in the world of thedas. he doesn't ask questions that expose the player to lore through dialogue as if he's stepped foot into thedas for the first time. those conversations feel very solid and good. i hope other faction players got as much joy out of this as i did.

and the things i didn't like and boy there's a lot unfortunately

the music. let's just get that out of the way holy shit. it doesn't feel like it belongs in this universe. it gets so incredibly sci-fi-y at times you'd think it's taken straight from mass effect andromeda. there's not a single song unique to veilguard that i really enjoyed. it broke my immersion, real bad. hearing a busker play the tavern songs from inquisition on a lute right after i killed some venatori with wobbly bass songs playing in the background is just odd. weird tonal shift. don't like it. it's made for people who like flashy light-weight cinema.

tevinter nights is required reading. the podcasts are required listening exercises. the game is so fast paced, especially at the start, that there's no time to introduce you to characters and how much weight their names carry in-game. i would not have known who half these people are if i hadn't skimmed over tevinter nights. i'd care even less about them than i already did. there is no time to get properly attached to them. people will act as if you're talking to a legend personified and you'll be thinking man goddamn which chapter of tevinter night were they in again and what did they do???

there's a weird mismatch with the animations. you'll have beautifully fluid ones, like emmrich casting spells. and then you'll have rook's face animating in the most unnatural manner that's sorta reminiscent of mass effect andromeda's "my face is tired" addison, when their emotions SHOULD be landing with the player rn instead.

i'm not vibing with the art style. sometimes it works. most of the time it doesn't. at points i felt like i was watching tangled.

that also brings me to some of the dialogue. same issue. i am watching frozen. i am watching tangled. someone on the writer's team really likes the adorkable trope. bellara is its victim.

for all the talk about identity, bioware sure doesn't like theirs. the grey warden armor got a redesign again and it just makes them look like a generic army. i hate it lol

in general, i don't like the armor design. the wardrobe/appearances system is fine, but it's just not helping if all the armors are just... kinda bland or downight bad looking? and don't get me started on the lords of fortune armor. that is orientalism personified.

the world states should have been carried over, full stop. i know they said they didn't because they want to separate what happens in the north from what happens in the south, which... i could have lived with that. but the inquisitor sends you letters that keep you up to date on... the south of thedas. you learn that there's a blight again, that people are standing strong but it's difficult, denerim's fallen, the rulers are taking care of it, orlais is fighting and they're successful for a while, etc etc. what's good bioware. i thought we don't care about the south this time around. why are you feeding me so much boring generic information. if you're not gonna show any of it and just write letters, then carrying the world state over should not have been an issue. i have a game dev background. those few lines of code would not have broken your budget or pushed your engine's limits. fuck right off.

this gripe of mine carries over to all the cameos. as a lord of fortune you have to deal with isabela a lot. it's fun. i missed her. you get to go drinking with her and taash and bellara! also my hawke romanced her. she's not mentioned once. they had the opportunity to put a sentence or two about her in there with not a lot of effort, trust me.

when varric dies, all she has is a single line about it. for gold, for fortune, for varric. she only says it if you interact with her on your way to the final push. that's not mandatory.

morrigan is there. kieran isn't. the old god soul that mythal and then solas absorbed? who cares at this point, the gods are dead now and solas is locked away for eternity. i suppose? why is morrigan there. she feels unneeded. i wish they'd just left her down south, at least that way i wouldn't have had to witness her god awful redesign.

dorian at least feels as if he belongs in this story. the shadow dragons are a crucial part to protecting minrathous. he's also weirdly underutilised. isabela and morrigan had more lines than him in my playthrough.

on the topic of romance: bro that was underwhelming. no, genuinely. you know when romance picked up a bit? after the point of no return. i heard maybe two lines of companion banter about it before that. maybe i missed something which i honestly doubt, but romance did not play much of a role in lucanis's storyline. i saved his grandmother as he wished me to (and if you read tevinter nights you know she was rather abusive and their relationship not the healthiest) and told him to focus on his family. a reunified family my rook wasn't even introduced to as a partner at the end of all that.

really, do not buy this game if you're only in it for the romances. others might be better, lucanis's basically gave me nothing. except for an outing (the second coffee date i had with him, it was getting repetitive) all of it played out once i committed to the final quest. the sex scene was a fade to black. annoyingly right after davrin died. if you're looking for well paced and good spice, pick up something else. the sweet talk and the final goodbye were nice though.

for all the good the ever-presence of gender identity does, it is brought up in such a disruptive manner too. it doesn't even play out naturally if you CHOOSE the lines that are meant to be said. hearing the words trans and non-binary in this setting doesn't feel right, and i'm saying this as a trans guy. i think it could have been handled more gracefully. the amount of times my rook went "i'm a MAN" as if he's about to start drumming on his chest and roaring any second now got super nerve-grating. "i'm so glad you're into me... the me who is trans. remember?" just. tell me one trans person who'd talk like that to a person they've grown close with and are trying to romance. this game doesn't handle sexuality well, so all this hey my body might not look like the way you're expecting it to look talk amounts to nothing anyway. i feel about this the way i feel about krem: this is partial exposition to trans experiences... packaged up for cis consumption. the ONLY exception to that is interacting with taash. holy shit was all of that heartwarming and bro did it feel good and natural to talk to them about theirs and rook's gender.

rivain and nevarra are new locations added by veilguard. they're also incredibly underwhelming, small and constricted maps. rivain is a coastline with a few ruins. the hall of valor is a partial ruin nestled into a cave on a beach, with a fighting pit. isabela is there in her skimpy outfit commentating your pit fights. that's it. i'm sorry if you were looking for a bustling pirate cove or whatever. you're not gonna get it. the nevarran crypts btw are a long ass dungeon crawl. that's it.

speaking of maps. i thought people were being dramatic when they said you're gonna be fighting the same enemies on them again and again. i thought they were figure of speeching it. they're not. you WILL fight the same amount of enemies. in the same spot. every time you reload the map. best to stay on a map and clear out the enemies and do as much questing on that map as you can before leaving, because you WILL have to do it all over again once you return.

the three choices i made for my inquisitor didn't matter lol she didn't have to face solas and therefore couldn't stop him at any cost as she had sworn (maybe because my rook tricked solas into binding himself to the veil, there was also an option to fight him. would she have stepped in? who knows). blackwall wasn't mentioned. and either her using a small amount of her forces in the final fight was the reason the civilians of minrathous fared so well..... or it just didn't matter. ultimately i think she had very little impact on anything

[lxnarphase]

𓇼 FUCK HER, FLIP HER, BEND HER BACKWARDS !

❤︎₊‧⁺...synopsis : the church always says sex for pleasure is a sin, and nanami kento is a man of the lord. but fuck, if his wife isn't worth sinning for. wc: 4.3k

❤₊‧⁺...cw : n. kento x fem!reader, religious themes, traditionalist views on sex and marriage, loss of virginity, missionary to mating press, breeding kink, overstimulation, unprotected sex, nanami loses himself in your pussy, slight cum play, dirty talk

❤₊‧⁺...lunar's note : am i unintentionally coping with religious trauma? possibly but it is fun :33 anyways based of this! forgive me if my writing is a bit rusty, it's been a while but enjoy !!

the two of you have spoken about eventually having children many times, but knowing the steps it took...it kept you both pushing it back, knowing eventually you'd both be ready.

after speaking with doctors, asking for advice from the church, and having you grumble about the neighbors who welcomed a cute baby girl, the two of you figured it was time.

you did your best to act normal all dayl, trying not to seem to nervous or too excited as you went about your chores for the day.

it may just be an act to procreate, but...it's still your first time with nanami. you want it to at least feel special.

there was nothing in the bible that went against that, right?

well, you have plenty of time to overthink since it seems that your dear husband will be at work late. to pass the time, you wait upstairs in your shared bedroom, the TV on as a distraction.

you're so stuck in your own world that you don't even notice him in the doorway before he clears his throat, leaning in the doorway. "oh! hi, honey, welcome home!" you go to stand up, but he holds up a hand, making you stop before you can get up from the bed.

it's silent, aside from the noise from the TV, and you can feel your stomach flip in anticipation.

has...has he always looked that handsome?

he continues to stand by the door, still not making eye contact. "you said it...starts today, correct," nanami questions, focused on undoing the straps of his watch. it shouldn't be attractive, it's such a simple task...yet it has your stomach doing flips as you nod.

"mhm, my, uh...ovulation starts today." it's such a weird thing to say, it just makes everything feel so...clinical. but that's how it's supposed to be, right? those who use sex for pleasure instead of procreation are sinners, or whatever the reverend at the church says.

"mm."

slowly pulling it off, he sets the watch on the dresser before shutting the bedroom door

"good."

dear god in heaven, you think to yourself, struggling to swallow the saliva pooling inside your mouth as he starts to undress. please forgive me for such inappropriate thoughts about my husband.

he removes his suit jacket—black today, it seems—placing it carefully on his desk chair, followed by his cufflinks and tie. his shirt is next, each button popping to reveal his strong, well-maintained physique.

you have to stop yourself from pumping your fist in the air for getting so lucky with such an attractive man as your husband. too busy ogling him like a horny teenager, you miss him undoing his belt before tugging them down and stepping out of his boxers.

once you do realize he's fully undress, you blush hard once he approaches the end of the bed—it took everything out of you not to stare at that...monster hanging between his legs, dear lord—and climbs onto it, making his way to hover over you.

his eyes roam up and down your body, taking in the pretty silky night dress you had on. It’s a soft blue with lacy white trim with little intricate flower designs.

modest, yet sensual.

"this is new," he comments, voice low and sultry. you can't help but wonder if he meant to sound so...so...

you don't find the correct word for it, but this new tone lights a fire in your stomach that has your r thighs squeezing together just a little bit.

"well, i figured it was an important night...you know, finally popping our cherries a-and starting a family?"

it's a weak attempt at humor, your voice clearly giving away your nervousness. you just pray that he ignores it.

a soft hum leaves him, his fingers playing with the intricately designed lace trim. the idea that you want to make this whole ordeal special, that you want to give yourself to him wholly, and that you want to swell with his child...

it pleases him greatly, a small smile touching his lips.

"well, aren't you sweet, my dearest?"

such simple words, yet they relieve so much tension from your shoulders. you can't help but smile back before a little gasp falls from your lips when his hands start to lift the dress up. his hands, they're so big, so hot on your skin.

It's a struggle to remember that this is for the purpose of producing offspring and nothing else, but you try, you try so hard.

but when you hear the hitch in his breath at the realization you didn't have anything else underneath the dress after he pulls it over your head, it's hard to remember.

the thought just about completely leaves your mind at the way nanami, your usually put-together husband, looks so hungrily down at you, a look you've never seen before in those pretty hazel eyes.

his gaze lingers on your body for a moment, mouth opening before shutting instantly, preventing himself from saying something he'd likely regret.

calm down, kento, he reminds himself, taking a second to clear his mind. this is for the purpose of family, not sinful and carnal desires.

even so, he's drinking in the sight of you, unable to stop his hands from rubbing up and down your sides, the soft skin of you, his wife, warming his palms. all his.

"gorgeous," he mumbles, unaware he even said it.

the moment you feel his leaking cock brush against your leg, a thought occurs to you.

neither one of you has a single idea of how to do this.

sure, you both know enough about putting it inside and moving, but that was about it. is there something else you should do? things you should say, places you should touch to aid in the process?

they never explained the actual process of sex in church, and lord knows your mother and father would've keeled over and died instantly if you were to ask them.

'it comes naturally when god deems it your time' the reverend stated once during a sermon. you fight back a frown, realizing that man probably had even less of an idea of how to do it.

however, the feeling of his tip nudging against your slit rips a gasp out of you, bringing you back into the present.

"are you alright? you left me for a bit there," nanami asks, his brow furrowed in worry. if you weren't ready, he was willing to back off. he may want to fulfill this important aspect of marriage, but...not if you don't want it.

"n-no, i'm okay! just...wondering how all of this is going to work out," you softly reassure, giving a weak giggle.

he can't blame you, he isn't very sure either. but as the man of the house and as your husband, he didn't plan on letting you worry. he would do all the work, you just needed to lay there looking so pretty, so soft, so...he realizes he's doing it again, letting his mind wander to places it shouldn't.

"just...j-just relax, we will figure it out as we go along."

with your silent nod, nanami starts to push his hips forward, hissing silently when he realizes the wetness that greets him.

you were this aroused just from...talking?

the thought of scolding you for letting your mind wander crossed his own, but...it would be hypocritical when his cockhead is dribbling precum all over your soft mound.

you choke out a noise of pain when his cock finally notches onto you and starts to push inside. sure, your wetness helped get the tip and the few inches after it inside, but just that is already too much for you, and you're expected to take all of it?!

you do your best not to move, not really sure what you should be doing. you'd be a good wife and bear with the pain if you had to, your nails digging into the pillow under your head as you braced yourself for the rest of his cock.

but this is absolutely unbearable, how do other women bear with this and have 6 or more children?!

a flicker of concern flashes through nanami's eyes at the sound you made, and he stops moving forward. he may be a bit mean sometimes, but he wasn't cruel.

if you both are going to go through with this, he is not going to make you suffer and nor is he going to force you to endure a painful experience.

no true man of god would do such a thing.

"breathe, don't hold it in," he instructs, his voice somehow calm and collected. one of his hands laces with yours, hoping to provide some sort of comfort as his lips brush against your forehead. "i've got you, darling, the pain will pass, just...tell me to stop if it gets too bad. don't hold it in."

giving a soft nod, you try to match his breathing, your body relaxing and making it easier for nanami to slip the rest of himself inside, a near silent sigh escaping him. the tightness and initial resistance that greeted him nearly made him moan, his cock twitching violently inside of you.

something about the physical feeling and knowledge that you saved yourself for him like you promised years before you both got married sent a surge of possession and pride, knowing he has such a loving and faithful wife who is so willing to give herself up to him like this...he can only hope you feel the same knowing he saved himself for you and only you.

so, as a 'reward'—and totally not because he fears you'll strangle his cock off with how tight you are—he's so gracious to you, not moving to let you get used to the stretch and feel of him inside, the room silent except for your matching breathing.

a few moments go by, and you should feel embarrassed when you feel slick drip out of you and down your ass. the realization that your dearest husband, one of the most faithful men of the church, is letting his cock soak inside of your hot cunt makes you whine a little, slick walls fluttering around him.

he's so fucked.

"a-ah...i'm going to move now," he warns, taking your sudden noise as a good sign. nanami shifts his legs just a bit before giving an experimental thrust, his brow furrowing as he slowly finds a rhythm.

the feeling of your hot and gummy walls is absolutely intoxicating, divine, nothing he's ever felt before.

this is what it felt like?

this is what he waited for?

fuck, it felt...it felt so good.

too good.

for you, the pain completely melts away, and you silently thank god and the angels above for giving you a merciful husband who is so kind as to wait for you to loosen up around him.

little do you know, he would rather kill himself than start moving when you're still adjusting to the pain and stretch.

his gentle movements make you all but melt under him, your eyes fluttering at the unbelievable pleasure coursing through your veins.

no wonder your parents preached about saving yourself until marriage, and thank the heavens you listened.

the very thought of feeling this way with anyone but your kento puts a bad taste in your mouth.

meanwhile, nanami chants prayers in his head over and over again as he tries his best to focus on the 'true' purpose for this.

the sticky, wet, and gooey sensation of your plump cunt sucking him, practically weeping each time he pulls out is just unfair.

the poor man, he's fighting so hard to maintain his composure, to not succumb to the base instincts that those soft moans of yours are beginning to stir within him.

"s-shush, darling," he grits out, hips still following his slow, deep pace. "don't...don't make such noises," he all but pleads, voice tinged with a huskiness that betrayed his growing need for you.

“i-i’m sorry! just, it...feels good, y-you feel good, feels s-so good,” you whisper, hands coming up to cover your mouth and stifle those sickeningly sweet noises.

but of course, that isn’t enough because each push and pull of his cock stirs your drooling cunt, filling the room with wet, filthy squelching sounds.

nothing about this is holy, nanami thinks as he grits his teeth, hands fisting in the sheets next to your head.

look at her.

those soft, muffled noises are truly music to his ears, his pace morphing from the slow, deep grind into a faster pace as your soft body gives into the pleasure.

so wet, so damn tight around my cock., like she never wants to let me pull out.

"k-kento, y-you're goin' too deep, i-i can't be quiet, s'too much!"

messy little pussy, 's beggin' for cum, needs it, needs to feel my tip kissin' her cervix as i pump load after load into her womb.

he knows what that little voice is, and no matter how much he wants to claim that it’s the sound of demons pouring their sinful words into his mind, he knows that it's his thoughts, fueled by those dirty little noises that she can't hold back.

how pitiful, how sinful, doesn't she know she's going against all the teachings they've heard preached every weekend in their church?

doesn't she know she's giving into lust?

doesn't she know her pretty sounds are making his dick throb, painting her insides with his hot, gooey precum?

"hush, 'm not going to t-tell you again, you...you need to be quiet," he growls, the command lacking its earlier authority.

nanami also knows lying is a sin, and he's doing a damned lot of it right now as he tries to convince himself that you need to stay silent. after all, this—this is just a process of giving you both a child, just like you wanted, and nothing else.

but he's lying to himself.

he needs you to be quiet or else he'll lose it.

the poor man is barely holding onto his restraint, and these sweet noises pouring from your mouth aren't helping at all.

"y-you make this so difficult sometimes, my dear..." his voice is rough with need and desire, a stark contrast to his usual composed demeanor. "but, by god, you're...you're. absolutely. exquisite."

he punctuates his words with a particularly hard thrust, grinding his hips into you in a way that has the coarse hair on his crotch to rub against your clit. the pleasure it gives you is electric, your legs coming up to squeeze his hips as you try to grind with him.

his words, his simple praise only makes you hiccup his name, crying out louder as your watery eyes roll back as your needy cunt squeezed down on his fat cock.

you're such a sweet thing, trying oh-so hard to mute your sounds. each snap of his hips is all but driving you insane.

“i-i can’t, ken, y-you don’t understand, i-it feels so good, i-i’m so full! you’re pressing against all the good spots, kentoo, i-i love you s' much, b-but i can't!”

be a good fucking husband and do what you were made to, nanami kento.

his teeth dig into his bottom lip, trying to hard to ignore that temptation purring in the back of his mind.

the voice is so much louder now, echoing throughout his mind and muting any prayers or pleads to be mindful of the sanctity of this whole process.

fuck her. give her what she needs, what she deserves.

but it's too fucking hard, he can't his hips are speeding up, his strong hands moving to grip your thighs, unaware of how they start to anchor behind your knees.

breed your pretty little wife and give her a baby like she deserves.

with a deep groan, nanami finally loses all control, fingers digging into your supple thighs to push them to your chest and practically folding you in half.

this new angle has him openly moaning like a dirty whore, allowing him to plunge even deeper into your tight, gummy walls, the head of his cock kissing your cervix with each and every deep thrust.

"k-ken, kenny, k-ken," you sob, tears catching onto your lashes as your entire being is assaulted by the endless pleasure your husband is giving you. he doesn't even look like your kento anymore, his pupils blown so wide that you can barely see the ring of greens and brown of his iris.

"f-fuck. 's all your fault, you know that," he hisses, eyes narrowing as he weakly glares down at you. but you can see the hearts in his eyes as he gives in to the pleasure.

his dark eyes bore down into yours, the wet plap plap plap plap of his hips slamming into yours almost overpowering his voice. "if y-you just stayed quiet like i asked, w-we wouldn't be here."

a little spurt of wet gushes out of you, making his fall forward into the juncture of your neck with a groan at the dirty noise it makes,

"god, i-i can feel it, y'know? can feel this sticky pussy—such a dirty little pussy—makin' such a mess. saved it jus' for me, didn't you, baby? mmhm—fuckin' hell, 's tight—thank you god f' giving me such an angel of a wife." nanami is huffing nonsense against your neck, pounding into you with a force that has the bed creaking loudly.

if you weren't being fucked stupid, you would be worried he was about to break the bed.

"you can keep that pretty mouth of yours shut, b-but you jus' had to have the noisiest little cunt."

he's so mean, but it only serves to make you gush even more, the way juices pour out of you and only make the already filthy noises even nastier.

"she's talkin' to me, baby, y'hear it? i'm...i-i'm gonna breed you," he manages to whine into your ear, pulling away to press his sweaty forehead against yours.

his tongue, so pink and pretty—you want it in your mouth, want to taste it want to feel it against yours—runs over his top lip as he watches drool drip down the corner of your mouth while you nod brainlessly.

nanami's never felt so dirty, so unhinged, but it feels so right, feels so fucking good. he never wants to leave your pussy, never wants to pull out, this is where he belongs, buried deep inside you as his cock pumps load after load right into your tummy, giving you what you need, what you deserve.

"yeah? you want that? i'll give it to you, baby, promise, 'm gonna be a good husband a-and knock you up, gonna make you a mommy."

that has you keening, tears pouring down your cheeks at the pleasure it shoots up your spine. you know you're close, but it's different.

it feels different, feels too much, there's pressure you've never felt before from the few times you'd cave in and play with your puffy, swollen clit in the shower when you waited for nanami to get home from work to kiss you to sleep.

no, you feel like you are about to fucking explode. "ken, i-i can't, 'm gonna—s-something's coming," you try to warn, your hands fisting in his hair as you tug and tug and tug.

the pull of his hair makes him moan like a slut, it sounds so fucking good. his eyes are rolling back before he rushes to comfort you, pressing soft little open-mouthed kisses against your lips.

you don't need to fight it, you just need to give it to him, give him what he needs.

"shh, shh, don' cry, y' look t'pretty, honey. l-let it happen, cum for me, i've got you, angel, cum for me s-so i can fill you up," he coos, his hips growing erratic as he feels your silky walls starting to fluttering around him, feeling you teeter on the edge of release.

he shifts, just barely, just enough to better position himself to fuck deeper into you. but that slight movement has his cock smushing against something soft and spongy that makes you sob, growing softer and more pliant under him, and you know you are done for as all you can do is wail his name.

"please, pretty girl, cum for me, show me how good 'm making you feel, soak my cock, c'mon, you can do it."

with a loud mewl that nearly has nanami soaking your walls in cum, you dig your nails into his biceps as you finally, finally cum. and you're right, it is different, your cute pussy squirting and creaming all over his dick.

the poor man is choking back a whine, eyes wide in shock as your cunt just gushes slick everywhere, clenching around him like a vice as you cum.

your juices are soaking his cock and balls, splattering against his lower abdomen obscenely. the thought of making you do that again crosses his mind for a split moment before the need to fill you up for being so good overpowers any other thought.

not giving you a break, he continues his unforgiving fucking, ignoring your cries and pleads for him to slow down.

"nonono, shh, shh, shush, you can take it," he coos against your lips, no longer caring if this was sinning or not. all he could think about was the constant squeezing and spasming of your poor overstimulated slit that was milking him toward his orgasm.

you try to squirm away, but the way he has you folded in half has you unable to do anything but accept his stupidly deep thrusts that make you swear you can taste his cock in the back of your throat.

"t-tha's it." he's panting, slurring his words, his fingers digging into the fat of your thighs. it’s so wet, so messy now, but he can't find it in himself to care.

no, all he can think about as he looks down at you is how you'll have that angelic glow as you grow round with his baby, and everyone will know you're his, that he knocked you up, he pumped you full of his cum, that you're his you're his you're all fucking his—

"f-fuck, honey, i-i can't..." his hips stutter as he does his best to maintain his rhythm, but his own release is barreling down on him. his heavy balls are drawing up tight as they slap against your ass, your juices still pouring out and soaking all of him.

"'m gonna fill you up, 'm gonna pump this—this sinful little cunt f-full of m'cum, angel, gonna knock you up, gonna have you drippin' with me, g-gonna give you a fuckin' baby, shit—"

with a deep, guttural groan, nanami hisses your name as he buries himself as deep as possible, his hot tip kissing your cervix as thick, hot ropes of his potent cum pour right into your womb, hips grinding into you and giving little thrusts as you milk his cock weakly despite your overstimulation.

it's—it's so much, he's still cumming, how was all of this inside of him? you can practically feel it sloshing around inside of you, and you whimper when you feel it gush out around his now softening cock, dripping down your ass onto the bed.

a moment or two passes, and he sits up, pushing his sweaty hair out of his face and looking down at you.

oh.

you sweet thing, you're an absolute mess. you have tear streaks down your cheeks, your lips swollen from him unknowingly biting them between the little kisses he was giving you, a pretty sheen of sweat on you, and...

his eyes trail lower to where his dick is still nestled inside of you, and it takes everything in him to not accidentally thrust his hips a little bit.

it's a creamy, sticky mess, a mixture of his and your cum seeping out your poor, abused pussy.

"o-oh. sorry, my love. i'm...not quiet sure what happened there. i apologize for such...foul language," he mumurs, his hand stroking your hip. "'s okay," you softly coo back to him, your eyes fluttering shut as you try to catch your breath. "i-i liked it..."

but you quickly learn you've married both a man of god and a curious, insatiable bastard who can't help but drag his cum all over your pussy, quickly finding your clit. and the reaction you give him is one he decides he likes, your hips canting up as your soft, oversensitive walls squeeze around his cock again.

"k-kento, that's nasty!"

all you get in response is a grumbling noise in his chest as it takes you weakly slapping your hands against his chest to get his eyes to snap away from your gooey, creamy pussy.

clearing his throat, he looks down at you, that heated look slowly creeping back onto his face. "perhaps we...we should try once more. just to ensure it takes," he states, doing his best to show some semblance of dominance.

but it's impossible when his hair is sticking to his sweaty forehead, his pupils blown as he gazes down at your panting form like he's about to devour you whole.

"after all, a...a big family is what god wants from man and woman, right? so we...shouldn't delay and keep trying." his hand trails up your side before finding its way to your breast, squeezing the soft flesh.

his thumb experimentally rolled your nipple, and the way your body reacted, a soft gasp of his name...how is he supposed to explain the feeling he's getting in the confessional booth?

"y-yeah," he gulps, leaning his head down. you can feel his hot breath against your tit, and you swear you feel drool drip onto your breast. "w-we'll keep trying. jus' to make sure w-we do what the scripture asks."

may god forgive him for being such a fucking liar and a damned bad one at that.

all rights reserved © lxnarphase | do not repost, copy, translate, or alter my work

[oizysian]

25 // Watching porn together // Ideas

Summary: Wanda and Y/N spend some quality time together.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader

Warnings: enchanted strap, porn, dirty talk, blow job

Word count: 1k

Kinktober masterlist

The television flickered with images of a couple, or they’re assumed to be a couple, making out naked. It was a man and a woman to shake things up a bit, and I was watching intently while Wanda traced shapes on my belly with her fingertips.

“If I had a cock,” I started, threading my fingers through her hair and grabbing a fistful, forcefully, but gently. “I’d force you down on it like this.”

I guided her head down on my crotch, getting wet just from the image of her pretending to suck my imaginary cock. I let out a low moan, biting my lip as I continued to bob her head up and down.

“Y/N …” she giggled softly, slapping my hand away from her head. “I do that anyway with your strap.”

“Yeah, but a real cock.” I brought my hand down to the juncture of my thighs and stroked my invisible dick. “Just being able to feel your mouth, hot and wet, and cum all over you.” I shuddered. “A dream.”

“A dream?” She questioned, the couple on the television now fucking doggy style. “A dream I can turn into a reality.”

My eyes got wide, excited, and urged her to continue.

“I can enchant your strap, make it feel like your own dick - if you’d like me to.”

“Yes! I-I mean,” I blushed, embarrassed at my answer. “That would be really …”

“I’d love for you to cum inside me.” She whispered against my lips. “Fill me with your babies.”

“Oh fuck, Wands.” I whimpered, absolutely soaked at this point, the sounds the woman in the video was making were not helping.

She smiled, stroking her hand along my abdomen.

“Do you wanna feel how wet I am for you? How tight I am?”

“Oh god, yes, please.” I was begging now. I needed this. I needed her.

“Promise you’ll make me take it all.”

“I swear on everything precious in this world that you’ll take every drop of my cum.”

She giggled, reaching over me to grab the strap we already had taken out in preparation for this night. She brought it over to the apex of my thighs and her eyes went red, the toy becoming my appendage in less than a second.

“Oh shit, fuck,” I cursed under my breath, the new feelings very overwhelming. “This is …”

“This is amazing. I was hoping it would work.”

“Hoping?”

She looked down at it and shrugged.

“This is the first time I’ve tried it. But I’ve thought about it. A lot.”

She brought her hand down to it, letting her fingers slide along the tip. My hips jerked and I shuddered under her touch, unable to control this new piece of me.

“You’ll get used to it in time.” She said, reading my mind. “Your thoughts are so loud, I’m sorry.”

“I’m glad you’re listening to my thoughts because I’m not sure words are going to work for me in a few minutes.”

She smiled up at me and gave me a peck on the lips before sliding down my body, bringing her face to my brand new cock and pressing a kiss to the tip.

“Holy shit, I’m already gonna bust.”

“Don’t.” She giggled. “I want you to do it inside me.”

“I promise nothing.”

She took it into her mouth and I let out a low, needy groan, threading my fingers through her tousled locks and pushing her head down onto me. She was so wet and hot and I needed more.

She took as much of it as she could in her mouth before she started to gag, pulling off of it and trying again. I could feel my entire body tightening and the coil in my belly was just about to break. Is this what virgin boys felt like?

Hearing my thoughts once again, she pulled off of me, straddling my hips and nestling my cock between her soaking wet folds. She grinded herself against me and I cried out pathetically, needing to be inside her already. I grabbed her hips and she took my hands in hers, holding them up above my head.

“Stay.” She whispered, her magic slipping from her fingertips to wrap around my wrists, holding me down.

My mouth fell open as I watched her sliding up and down cock, just barely slipping inside her with every thrust.

“Please. Please, baby.”

“Please, what?” She breathed out, her clit rubbing against my length.

“Please, I need to be inside you. Please.”

She bit her lip, bracing herself as she eased herself down on my cock. My eyes rolled back into my head and I got lost in the pleasure. She bounced up and down on top of me, her hungry cunt squeezing me as she worked on getting us both off.

“Wanda - I’m not - I’m gonna -”

Her thrusts got faster, stronger, and I literally could not control myself any longer. I fought against her magic, trying to touch her, but she held me down, which only turned me on further, and I came inside her, the amount of cum that spurt out of my dick immeasurable. She moaned loudly as I filled her up and I watched as it spilled out of her. She continued to fuck my cum back into her.

“Oh fuck, Y/N, I’m gonna cum.”

I watched as she threw her head back and came, her pussy milking my cock and causing my legs to shake. It was too much. I rutted up against her, my hips jerking as she continued to milk me for all that I was worth. I could hear the couple on the t.v. moaning, fucking, and I watched Wanda riding the last of her high out on my dick, my heart nearly pounding out of my chest.

“This movie gave me an idea.” She said softly, her breathing ragged. “I wanna try doggy with the enchanted strap.”

I looked up at her from under hooded eyes, practically spent from just one fuck.

“S’too much.” I mumbled and she smiled.

“Is my pussy that good?” She teased and I nodded.

“Best thing I’ve ever felt in my life.”

[bahablastplz]

Roommate: Chan x Reader

Roommate Chan who wants to help you destress with a massage after a long day... Content: Just straight-up smut Warnings: Fingering, praise, degradation, a little humiliation WC: 1100

You were laying on the couch with Chan. 

Chan has been your roommate for some time and your friend for longer than you could remember, so to be sprawled across the couch, limbs somewhat intertwined and a movie to be played in the background was nothing unfamiliar. Especially after a long day at work, taking the time to unwind together was nothing new. 

But today you were just so tense. Stiff all over, muscles tense and sore, you were unable to find relief. You suppose that your gym workout from yesterday had been a little intense, and you were certainly feeling it now. 

Subconsciously as you watched, you started to punch your legs a little bit, trying to get the tightened muscles to relax. 

Chan’s hands shot out and grabbed your own, making you freeze. 

“What are you doing, babygirl?” He sounded concerned but the nickname made sparks fly through your body. 

“Nothing,” you say, trying to explain it away. Of course, Chan would never let that happen. 

He doesn’t let go of his grasp on your hand. “You call punching your legs ‘nothing?’” He inquires. 

“My legs are just a little sore,” you sigh. “It was leg day yesterday.” 

“Ahhh,” he says, as if that explains everything. Maybe it did. His eyes are back on the screen, but his hands are grabbing your legs to place them over his lap, pulling you even closer to him.  

“What are you–” 

“Shhh, helping,” he says. His big, strong hands are on your legs now, his dexterous fingers working into your muscles. You let out a sigh of relief as you feel him working away the tension, his thumbs moving over your thighs to rub deep yet gentle circles into your skin.  You’re aware of every movement, however, and you hate how flustered his actions have you. Chan never shied away from physical touch, and he’s even given you a brief platonic shoulder massage before. As your roommate, of course he’s seen you in more vulnerable scenarios, seeing into the more casual or intimate aspects of your life, but this… you couldn’t help but stare at the man who seemed so unfazed. 

As he rubs into a particularly sore area, you let out a tiny groan. 

“Feels good?” he asks, a small smirk splaying across his features but his eyes glued to the screen. 

You nod your head. The tone of his voice has arousal running through your entire body and your breath hitches as he moves higher, still only mid-thigh. You hope he doesn’t catch your reaction–surely he won’t, he’s not even watching you.  

Lightly he slaps the inside of your thigh, causing you to gasp. “Use your words,” he scolds. 

“Yes,” you answer, too fast. “Feels good, Chan.” 

“Good girl,” he praises, though the way he coos the words makes it feel less like a compliment. Your eyes stay glued to him and the way he stays unaffected; his words make you squeeze your thighs together lightly, searching for a little relief. What you weren’t expecting was for him to grab the flesh of your thigh hard between his fingers, causing you to let out a moan. 

“Such a filthy girl,” he says. “Here I am trying to give you a massage and make you feel good but you’re over here having dirty thoughts, aren’t you?” His hand stays between your legs, rubbing your inner thigh but not making its way higher. You squeeze your legs harder, trapping his hand between your legs. 

“Need you, Chan. Touch me, please?” You decide to just say it, just needing to get past the hurdle knowing it will be worth it. He doesn’t let up as easily as you think though. 

“Oh? But I am touching you, sweet girl,” he says, pinching your inner thigh and causing you to spread them open for him. “Or are you talking about your needy pussy?” He trails his hand up, resting it against your clothed core. You nod your head unabashedly and he laughs at your excitement. His eyes are on you now, finally, and you burn under his gaze. You watch as he pushes the fabric to the side and dips his fingers shallowly into your entrance, gathering your arousal on his fingers. He pulls out to show you how soaked his fingers are. 

“Look how wet you are for me, baby,” he praises. “My sweet, dirty girl is so needy for me, all from a little touching.” 

“Just for you,” you confirm, and you watch him take a deep breath, affected by your words. Sliding his hands back down to your center, he gathers more of your arousal and spreads it around your clit, circling slowly around the area with his fingers. It’s obvious from his stare that he is more than alright with taking his time with you, relishing in the way that you fall apart on his fingers. He hisses when you spread your legs open wide for him, giving him full access. He moves fast, grabbing your shorts and ripping them off of your body. When you close your legs again he tuts, grabbing them and forcing them wide open for him, slotting his body in between your legs. 

“Such a pretty pussy,” he says. He slides two fingers into your entrance now, shallowly fucking his fingers in and out of you. “Such a slutty pussy, for me.” You relinquish control and let him take over, submitting to the urge to arch your back and let out a loud moan. He continues to babble about how he can’t believe he’s waited for so long to have you like this, how he’s been thinking of touching your pussy for so long, and you start to tremble beneath him. 

“Chan,” you say, trying to warn the man, but he shushes you. 

“I got you,” he says. He shoves his fingers into you deeper but doesn’t change his pace, curling his fingers. “Let go for me.” That’s all you need to find your release, completely coming apart for him on his fingers. He sweet talks you right through your orgasm, slowing his movements. 

You watch as he pulls his fingers out of you, looking deep into your eyes as he puts his fingers into his mouth and sucks. “So sweet,” he says, more to himself than to you. He reaches over your body for the remote, clicking the power button and turning off the device. The action makes you laugh. 

“What?” he laughs with you. “Don’t act like you were actually watching that, I definitely wasn’t.” You scoff at his words and screech as he picks you up, cradling you into his chest. 

“Your room or mine?”  ***

Author's note: Sorry not sorry for the double Chan post, he is my bias though so don't be surprised...

Masterlist Recs

[heavyhitterheaux]

Love Me Like You Do (NSFW)

Synopsis: Ever since you became the social media manager for the Bengals, you couldn't help but to catch a certain quarterbacks eye. The playful banter continues to build until the two of you can't take it anymore.

Pairing: Joe Burrow x Reader

Requested by: an amazing anon 💕

Do not engage if you are underage

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

“Can you focus for five minutes? I'm convinced you're about to start drooling. Stop staring at her. You act like she’s about to disappear into thin air or something.” Ja'Marr told Joe who instantly turned from looking in your direction as you were talking with Tee to make a face at him.

“I'm not staring.” Joe replied and now it was Andrei's turn to make a face right back.

“Ever since she started working with us, all you literally do is talk to her and stare at her when we have breaks during practice. Even on game days you barely let that woman breathe. You make sure that you see her before the game and immediately after. Before that, you would avoid being on our social media account at all costs. Now it seems like we have to pull you away from her.” Andrei added and Joe responded by rolling his eyes at him.

“Ask her out on a date already to put us out of our misery. I'm tired of hearing about it and tired of you making googly eyes at her like she’s something to eat.”

“I don't! But I can't help it if she's easy on the eyes. They're brown by the way if either of you haven't noticed yet. When the light hits them just right, they look like honey.”

“Oh, this is worse than I thought. This man is down BAD.” Ja'Marr told Andrei as he glanced at him.

“SIMP!”

“And who are you trying to convince? Us or yourself?”

“A little bit of both, but I thought she had a boyfriend?” Joe was thinking back to the time he had come across your Instagram and it was flooded with pictures with you and significant other. He also took note how the two of you recently celebrated your third anniversary together.

“Well being the good friend I am, I found out that they broke up about two weeks ago. We got to talking for a while and she mentioned that she had a lot more free time on her hands and needed to do something to occupy it.” Ja'Marr told Joe, who tried to contain his new found excitement.

“Joe knows plenty of things to do to occupy her time.” Andrei said before laughing with Ja'Marr also joining in.

The last thing that he ever wanted to do was be disrespectful and try to pursue you, knowing that you had a boyfriend. But now that you didn't, you were fair game. However, he didn't know if you would be quite ready for that to happen since the break up was still fresh.

“Wait, you're serious?”

Ja'Marr simply nodded his head before turning to look to see that you were tapping away on your phone and more than likely uploading content from today's practice to the Bengals official social media pages.

“Do you think she really likes me like that though?” He asked and both of them just stared at him.

“Don't ask stupid questions. Matter of fact, go over there and talk to your girl.” Andrei tried to convince him, but didn't wait for a response as he turned Joe around to push him forward, not noticing that you were in fact making your way over to them.

“We'll leave you two be. Y/N has harassed me enough today.” You heard Andrei complain and you simply rolled your eyes.

“Just because I found one of your baby pictures and printed it out on a shirt and asked you to sign it doesn't mean I harassed you. Hi, Ja'Marr, you'll be next.”

“PLEASE NO. I just don’t understand how you always find something embarrassing about us and post it on social media.”

“I have my ways and I will never share my secrets.” You playfully said as you winked at him, but all he did was roll his eyes.

“Here, bother Joe and leave me out of it.”

As soon as both of them started to walk away, you turned to Joe and smiled.

“I definitely need to see that baby picture, so I can mess with him later.” He told you as he played with his helmet in his hand.

“I already posted it on the page if you want to take a look. But since I have you here, you looked good out there today. How are you feeling about Sunday?” You asked as you whipped out your phone to press record to add it to Tik Tok.

“I’m feeling better now that I saw you, princess. You make practice worthwhile.” Joe threw a wink in your direction and he couldn't understand where this new found confidence of his was coming from, but he was in no way, shape, or form complaining about it.

“JOE! I can't post that! And I mean how did practice go today?”

“You can post anything you want, Y/N. You're the manager after all.”

“But not you calling me princess!”

“Why? Don't want to make anyone jealous?” Joe asked as he inquired about your boyfriend, well now ex-boyfriend.

“Only people who would get jealous are your little groupies.” You told him as you rolled your eyes.

“Hmm. I guess, but they'll just have to deal with it since I can't help that I like talking to pretty girls. Especially with the name Y/N and if they have brown eyes.”

“Joeeeee, can you PLEASE be serious for thirty seconds!?!? Thirty seconds is literally all I'm asking for here.” You whined as you felt your cheeks heating up.

“Am I getting you all flustered?”

“Why are you making this more difficult than it needs to be? This is the last thing that I need to do for the day. Stop playing and answer the question!” You playfully said to him and he simply shrugged.

“I like talking to you, and can tell that you like talking to me too.”

You were taken aback by how forward he was since Ja'Marr had shared with you the other day how reserved he usually was and the fact that it had been that way since the two of them met at LSU.

“Hmm, who told you that?”

“No one had to tell me that. I can just see how you constantly smile while we are. Did I ever tell you how pretty it was? Your smile, I mean.” He asked as he stepped towards you, closing the small gap that had been there before. He was standing directly in front of you and his eye contact never faltered as he moved one of your curls out of the way that had fallen. The butterflies immediately erupted and you thought your heart was about to beat out of your chest.

“Burrow, you are going to get me in trouble.” You whispered as you poked him in his chest and your work phone had been long forgotten and slipped into your back pocket.

“And I'll make sure to get you out of it.”

“Y/N! You almost done?” You heard Mindy ask who was one of the people on the social media team with you and nodded your head yes.

“I see everyone wants your attention and I think I've taken enough of it for the day, so what did you want to ask me?”

“You are one person that I'm never going to complain about if you take up my time. But, my original question was "how are you feeling about Sunday?” You asked as your work phone was pulled back out and only the actual question for Joe was caught on video.

“Definitely feeling good, we had good practices all week and worked on some things that needed improvement. As long as we keep doing that and moving forward, I'm hoping for a good outcome.” Joe finally answered and you smiled as you ended the video.

“I'll see your pretty face cheering me on this Sunday? Left up to me, you would be in my suite in the stadium, but I know you need to be down here working. But I can only complain so much since you'll be closer to me on the sidelines.”

“I bet your suite can also be used for something else, but I guess it has to be saved for another time.” You whispered to him and all he did was smirk.

“Be careful, princess.” He told you as he picked up his helmet and held your gaze.

“I'll see you on Sunday.” You replied as you winked at him before walking towards Mindy who was smiling and wiggling her eyebrows.

“No, stop.” You told her as you pointed your finger at her and shook your head, but she continued making faces.

“So, what's happening between you and our favorite quarterback over there?” She asked as the two of you started walking back to your office. Your goal was to edit a few more videos before posting them and then going home.

“Absolutely nothing and I have no idea what you're talking about.”

“Cut the bullshit, please. Ever since you came on, he has been infatuated with you. Before he would literally try to run from us and avoid us at all costs.” She told you and you couldn't help but stifle a laugh.

Yeah, that sounds just like how everyone else described him before you got hired.

Mindy had been there for a year before you came and would constantly tell you stories about Joe. She knew that you had eyes for him even when you were still in a relationship that you knew was going nowhere.

“Isn't that against the rules or something here?”

The last thing you ever wanted was to get in trouble because they could find another social media manager, but definitely couldn't find another Joe Burrow.

“Who says anyone has to know? Joe is literally the most private person on the team and I highly doubt that he would ever put you in a position where you could possibly lose your job. We all can tell that the two of you like each other. A blind person could even see it.”

“I don't know, I don't have the best track record with athletes.” You told her referring to your ex-boyfriend as you unlocked the door to your office and walked in with her quickly following behind you and closing the door in order to keep the conversation as private as possible.

“Just give him a chance. I know that you won't regret it. You didn't hear this from me, but he does ask me about you when you aren't here. You broke up with your boyfriend who literally cheated on you on your birthday. Just give that white boy a chance.”

“And if it doesn't work out? It's not like I can actually avoid him since we literally work at the same place.”

“And what if it does work out? You have got to stop being so negative all the time and try to look at the bright side of things. Do you know how many girls wished Joe looked at them the way that he looks at you? I'm surprised we haven't seen him drooling at this point.” She muttered and you couldn’t help but to laugh as she went to your mini fridge and grabbed sparkling water while also handing you one.

“I literally just broke up with Carson not even a month ago.”

“And maybe that was your sign that it was time to move onto something bigger and better.”

—

It was now Sunday and as the two minute warning was announced, the frustration on Joe's face was evident and it was clear that the Bengals were about to suffer through another loss. You watched from a short distance as he made his frustrations known by throwing his helmet with a string of curse words soon following.

The game had started off well and looked promising, but the defense couldn't get it together to save their lives and looked as if they had never seen a football before in their life.

Joe had played exceptionally well and it made you sad to think that he was going to get the blame for the loss even though it clearly wasn't his fault.

Another touchdown had been scored by the opposing team and even though the looks of defeat were prominent on the sideline, the offensive line held their heads high as they grabbed their helmets to head back into the game.

As the play was underway, Joe couldn't find anyone open to pass it to and ended up getting sacked and you could hear Mindy sigh as she was standing next to you when suddenly an idea popped into your head and you hoped that Joe would be up for it when you presented the idea to him.

As expected, once the game was over Joe was the last one to walk out of the stadium and he was caught off guard at the sight of you being next to his car waiting for him. He gave you a small smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.

“Don't worry, not here to record anything to post tonight. Just had an idea to hopefully make you feel better if you're up for it.”

“Y/N….”

“I know you probably want to be by yourself right now and sulk but not because you played absolutely amazing but because some of your teammates didn't and you'll ultimately get blamed for it, but let me do this for you.” You pleaded as you moved closer to him and took his hand in yours.

Sighing to himself, Joe finally gave in and nodded, making a smile break out on your face.

“It's not too far from here and no one should bother you because it's really discreet and low-key. I'll drive so hop in.”

Joe heard you unlock the door and wasted no time opening it and sliding into the passenger seat.

Once you were settled behind the wheel, you took off towards one of your favorite hole-in-the-wall spots in downtown Cincinnati as Joe had his eyes closed and his head was resting against the headrest.

You left the music on a low volume, figuring that the less stimulation Joe had would be for the better.

Pulling into a parking spot at the back of the building, you put the car in park as Joe was looking around and taking in his surroundings.

“Where are we?” Joe asked, not really recognizing this particular part of the city that you two were currently in.

“You look like you could use some comfort food and cheese fries are at the top of my list when it comes to that. So that's what we're here to get.”

Joe contemplated for a minute before shrugging his shoulders.

“Just have to spend another hour in the gym this week to work it off, but fuck it. Let's go.”

The two of you proceeded to exit your car and walk around to the front of the building towards the entrance. Once Joe walked in, he could see why this was one of your favorite places. It was quiet and not a lot of people were inside.

“You want to share one? It's usually stacked all the way to the ceiling and I can never finish one by myself. But it's my treat anyway, get anything else you want.” You told Joe as he was still scanning the menu to see if he wanted anything else to go with his cheese fries.

“You don't have to do that.”

“They're sympathy fries so yes I will do it.”

“Does that come with a side of sympathy kisses too?” Joe asked as he whispered in your ear and smirked at you, but you kept your eyes on the menu in front of you and it took everything in you to not turn around at that very second.

Before you could respond, it was your turn to order and before you could swipe your card to pay for it, Joe beat you to it and you couldn't help but to roll your eyes.

“Seriously? I told you that they were sympathy fries and that it was my treat.” You told him as you turned towards him.

“And I asked you if that came with sympathy kisses and you have yet to give me an answer.” Joe replied as the cashier handed him the receipt as the two of you went and sat in a booth in the back corner hoping that he wouldn't draw a lot of attention.

“It could come with more than kisses, but like I said before, you sir are going to get me in trouble.” You answered as you slid into the booth with Joe immediately sliding in next to you. Both of your backs were facing away from the other customers in the store and Joe took this as an opportunity to place his hand on your thigh.

“And like I said before, I'll make sure to get you out of it. I can’t wait until I have you whimpering underneath me.” He whispered in your ear and the butterflies once again made themselves known.

“Are you always so forward in telling girls what you want?”

“Only the pretty ones that catch my eye.” He told you as he pinched your cheek making them instantly heat up.

“Oh, so there's others besides me?”

“What? You jealous princess?” He asked as he went to the counter to get the cheese fries that you two would share.

When he came back to the table and set it down in front of you, he slid back down into his seat next to you.

“I think you get a kick out of me being flustered all the time and say certain things on purpose to do it.” You told him as you reached for a fry.

“I do it because I think it's cute, but you have no reason to be jealous anyway since you're the only one that I have eyes for.”

“If I'm the only one that you have eyes for, then why haven't you asked me out on a proper date?”

“Because someone made me aware of the fact that you had just gotten out of a relationship. I definitely want to go on an actual date with you, but I want to do this at your pace. I don't want to make you uncomfortable in any way or pressure you. I'll be here and we'll just do it when you're ready. So for right now, if you just want me to continue to get you flustered or hot and bothered, I don't mind.”

—

It had been a week and two days since Joe had seen you and he was getting more and more worried by the minute. It wasn't like you to miss work, so his first thought that popped into his head was that something must be wrong. When he asked during practice all week if anyone had seen you, the answer was no. Even Mindy hadn't seen you which left him thoroughly confused.

In the back of his mind he was hoping that he didn't scare you off and was now silently cursing to himself about how forward he was with you the other night when you two had gone out after the game. After a meeting that he had with Zac, he went on the hunt for your office. Once he found it after getting lost a few times, he knocked on the door and heard your soft voice telling him to come in.

“Are you avoiding me, princess?” Joe asked as he smiled at you and stepped all the way into your office as he closed the door behind him.

“Hey, what are you doing here? There isn't practice today and no. I wasn't avoiding you, I just haven't felt all that well for the past week so that's why I wasn't here.”

“I wanted to thank you properly for what you did for me the other night. I needed that.”

“You’re welcome and hopefully that won't be the last time it happens. You've thanked me multiple times already so that is more than enough.” You told him as you moved your laptop to the side to give him your undivided attention.

“But not properly like I want to. And are you feeling better now?”

“A lot better. So much better in fact that I actually came to work as you can see.”

“Oh? I thought it was because you missed me.”

“Hmm, I can actually admit that I did. And what did you have in mind to thank me properly?” You asked and Joe came around your desk to stand right next to you as he leaned against it.

“I can show you better than I could tell you.”

Standing up, you moved a little to the left so that you were directly in front of Joe in between his legs and lifted your arms to place them around his neck.

“Does thanking me properly require us to wear clothes?” You whispered against his lips and a smirk immediately came across his face.

“It actually doesn't, but it does require letting me taste you.”

“Then I think it's best that we lock the door.”

As he nodded, he slipped away from your hold on him and went to lock the door before walking back over to you and meeting his lips with yours.

Those butterflies were once again making themselves known as Joe's hand played with the waistband of your shorts and broke apart from you to ask for permission to make sure that it was okay.

Giving him a quick nod, he wasted no time in removing the material from your body along with the thong that you were wearing underneath of it. He simply picked you up and placed you on your desk without warning as he then got comfortable on his knees in between your legs.

He kissed all along both thighs before reaching the destination that you wanted him to be at most and held eye contact with you as he took one long lick across your folds making you gasp.

“If we do this, you have to stay quiet for me. Oh, and one more thing. Your eyes need to stay on me the entire time, otherwise I'll stop. Think you can do that princess?” He asked as he inserted two fingers into you making you buck your hips forward and forgetting all about what he asked.

“I asked you a question and I need an answer. I need to know if you'll be a good girl for me.”

“Yes, I promise.” You quietly said and that was all Joe needed to hear before he dived in and showed you absolutely no mercy.

“Then make sure we keep those legs spread.” Was the last thing you heard before Joe decided to use his mouth as well as his fingers to bring you pleasure and you did as you were told.

Both of your eyes stayed locked on each other the entire time.

Nothing was coming out of your mouth except soft whimpers in the hope that you could stay as quiet as possible, but it was growing more difficult by the second.

Before you knew it, you felt him add another finger as your hands instantly moved to pull him in closer to you.

“Take your shirt off. I want to see all of you.”

Listening to his requests, you lifted up your shirt that had the Bengals logo in the corner of it over your head and tossed it into a corner behind your desk. Your bra was next to come off, and as you undid the clasp in the front, Joe began to suck on your clit.

He had immediately caught you off guard and a bigger moan ended up escaping past your lips and Joe gripped your thighs harder in order to tell you that you better not move.

“You like that princess?”

“Yes, fuck! Your mouth feels so good.”

“And just wait until you feel something else.” He replied as he went back to sucking on your coit as you slowly began to play with your nipples as you rolled them back and forth between your fingers and pulled at them.

Joe had kept his eyes on you the entire time like he told you he would and you honestly thought that you would be shy underneath his gaze, however, this new found confidence had made its way to you and you were not about to complain.

As Joe sucked harder and your juices were running down his chin, you knew that you were close and it seemed like he also had a sixth sense and knew because his grip on you had gotten even tighter.

“Babe…” You softly breathed out and Joe nodded instantly knowing what you meant.

You tried to push him away, but it was unsuccessful as you covered your mouth with your hand and came all over his face.

“Shit!”

Your legs were shaking, but that didn't matter since he was still eating you out and giving you his undivided attention.

Throwing your head back and breaking eye contact with him, you could've swore that you saw stars.

Recovery time was next to none as you opened your eyes and saw that Joe had now gotten rid of his clothes and was lightly stroking himself as the pre cum leaked from the tip of his dick making your mouth water. Seeing how big he was made you slightly nervous and he could obviously tell from the look on your face. Joe slipped on a condom with ease before looking back up at you.

“I promise to go slow and take my time. If you want me to stop, just tell me. You ready, princess? You're doing so good for me.” He said as he leaned down to place several kisses on your lips with you eagerly kissing him back.

To respond to him, you simply nodded your head, but that wasn't enough for him.

“Need to hear you say it, baby. You want me in you?” Joe asked as he was kissing along your neck.

“Yes, so so bad.”

“Then spread those legs some more and act like you want it.”

Both of your foreheads were touching and eye contact was kept as he slowly inserted himself into you and bottomed out making you both gasp.

This was long overdue and you couldn't believe that the two of you actually waited this long in the first place.

“Shit, you feel so fucking good, princess.”

Your arms wrapped around his neck as he began to move in and out of you at a slow and even pace.

“Such a good girl for me.” Joe told you before capturing your lips in another kiss and slightly increasing how fast he was going.

A month ago, you would had never believed that the beloved quarterback would be fucking you in your office at the Bengals stadium, but here we were.

It was taking everything in Joe not to release right then and there because of all the built up sexual tension that had been happening for a matter of months but at this point in time, he chose not to care.

Less than three minutes later, both of you released at the same time and were doing your best in order to catch your breath. Joe stayed inside you as he placed kisses all along your upper body in order to let you ride out your high. Once he could tell that your breathing was back to normal, he slid out of you making you wince.

“You okay?” He politely asked and you instantly nodded your head.

“Never better and I think that’s the best ‘thank you’ that I've ever gotten.” You answered as you softly kissed him.

“And there's a lot more where that came from.”

“If there is like you say that there is then I think the most proper thing to do is to show me. If I'm getting all of this just for some cheese fries, I can't even imagine what I would get if it was something bigger than that.”

“Well we have plenty of time for you to find out.”

Two months later

It was still dark outside when you woke up with a start and you noticed the tight hold that Joe had on you since his arms were wrapped around your waist.

Grabbing your phone, you checked the time to see that it was around four in the morning and made sure to turn down the brightness to not disturb your boyfriend who was sleeping peacefully beside you.

He didn't have to be at practice until eleven in the morning and more than likely would want you to go workout with him once he woke up. Usually you didn’t work out when you went, because he would always do something to distract you on purpose, but you simply kept him company which he was more than pleased with.

You were caught off guard when you felt a soft kiss being placed on your right shoulder and they slowly made their way up your neck.

“Shouldn't my baby be sleeping?” He asked as he peeked over to see you scrolling through your phone.

“I think I went to sleep too early. I always forget when I come and stay with you that you go to sleep early like an old man.” You teased and even though you couldn't see him, Joe rolled his eyes.

“I need all the sleep I can get during the season. You know that.”

“I do know that so stop talking and go back to sleep and let me scroll on my phone in peace. You have to be up to go to the gym anyway in like two hours.”

“How can I sleep with that bright ass light in my face?”

“Stop being so dramatic, Joey. I turned down the brightness.”

“But obviously not enough. Put your phone down and cuddle with me before I have to get up.”

“Hmm, I guess I'll allow it.” You replied as you locked your phone and set it down on the nightstand.

“You know what? On second thought, lay on your back.”

“Do you want to lay on me?” You asked him as you adjusted in his king sized bed and Joe was now laying beside you.

“No, not yet. I want my pre-workout meal which consists of me eating you out first.” He told you as he threw off the comforter and moved closer to the end of the bed.

“I… really? And that's supposed to give you energy?” You asked as Joe hooked his thumbs in each side of your panties before pulling them down and you lifted up your hips to help him slide them off your body.

“It sure does. Especially when I hear you moan and you're telling me to go faster. Love it when I know I'm making my girl feel good.” He told you as he lightly brushed his fingertips against you.

“Then stop talking and get to it.”

“That's the second time you've gotten smart with me so your ass better not try to run away from me either.”

“No promises.”

–

It was now 10:15 in the morning and you were attempting to do your hair when you caught Joe's eye as he was watching you through the mirror.

“What babe? Why are you staring at me? Does my hair not look right?” You asked as you were now examining it and was going to take it out before he quickly stopped you as he walked over to you and wrapped his arms around you.

“Your hair is perfect, you don't need to do anything different.” He told you as he reached around and kissed your cheek.

Turning around to face him, you reached up to kiss him and he gave you several more kisses in return.

“Sometimes this doesn't feel real.” You whispered to him as he leaned down to kiss you on the tip of your nose.

“What doesn't feel real?”

“This. Us.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because having someone that treats me how I'm supposed to be treated and respects me and truly shows that he cares about me has been a foreign concept to me for a long time. And you've just been so patient with me. It just seems too good to be true.”

“But it isn't too good to be true and as long as you want to be with me I'm going to show you that every single day. You're never going to have to question the way that I feel about you and you have my word with that.”

You nodded as Joe spoke and immediately hugged him tighter as he kissed the top of your head.

“Can I confess?”

“Let's hear it.”

“I know that this is still kinda new and everything, however, I think I'm starting to fall in love with you more and more everyday.”

“And can I also confess?”

You nodded your head as he began to rub small circles along your back.

“I feel the exact same way.”

Taglist:

@hoodharlow

@wickedfun9

@a-moment-captured

@dandelionwrites8

@keiva1000

[ckret2]

please more evil ford please i stare with my puppy eyes for this i am obbsessed

Yeah all right, I've been working on some art. (For context, we're talking about this Evil Ford.)

Evil Ford is Evil as in "cheerfully works with Bill even after learning his full plot" and "is totally ready to conquer and/or destroy the world." But other than the shocking lack of basic ethics and the supervillain objective he's mostly the same guy—which means he still cares about his family. He's hoping to get them to join in on the world conquest plan.

Forty-odd years ago he went off to college promising someday he'd be a big shot scientist who changes the world and he'd make his family a fortune. If taking over reality doesn't qualify he doesn't know what does. The family can join him and his buddy Bill and rule the universe together. Pines Pines Pines Pines!

Unfortunately for him, the rest of the family still has normal moral compasses. And also they've met Bill.

Bill can't currently possess Ford due to Reasons; but even though he can't get in the driver's seat he still has permission to ride shotgun at any time. Ford talks to him pretty regularly. He HAS been caught doing this. Stan thinks he's just gone a little nutty from thirty years of isolation.

Naturally, since he was always on Bill's side, Ford's perception of events during Weirdmageddon is a bit different:

I finally made an official Evil Ford New Costume Character Design, check out his exciting totally different brand new look:

I decided that, since Ford is still basically the same person aside from his terrible life goals, he'd probably have the same fashion sense. And so... nothing changes except two tiny details lmao.

But he DOES have tattoos:

I traced a canon character model and took off its top to get a base to slap tattoos on, and then went dang... they gave him a big head and arms. He looks goofy. Anyway,

His forearms have less incriminating tattoos—just a birch tree and a sunrise. (The sunrise looks like the Journal 3 "The Muse Has Spoken" page.) The red text is the "triangulum entangulum" ritual; if anyone asks he'll go "it's uhh an ancient Sumerian poem about how great science is." It's not until he's topless that it's like "oh so he's a CULTIST cultist." The one exception is an unconcealed Eye of Providence on his right palm—but it's in an ink that's only visible in certain lighting. It's there so at any time he can point his hand at something and go "Bill are you seeing this BS?"

Of course, he still has the "hey now, you're an all star" neck tattoo. I didn't have room to draw it.

As you can see, he's made being Bill's right hand man a core part of his personality. Rather than spending 30 years scrabbling around the multiverse desperately searching for a way to destroy Bill, he spent 30 years chilling in the Quadrangle of Qonfusion as Bill's specialest favoritest Henchmaniac, and only scrabbling around the multiverse occasionally for fun & profit.

Here's a photo Bill & Ford took at a Nightmare Realm house party like fifteen years ago, three minutes before Bill started an argument and set the house on fire.

Most people have their wild party years in college, Ford has his in his 40s.

[mlyscha]

SURPRISE, SURPRISE! ✦ S.JAEYUN

𝓼ynopsis. in which you secretly book a flight to korea to celebrate jake's birthday with him. 𝓹airing. s.jaeyun x female!reader 𝓰enre. fluff, crack, suggestive and smau if you squint. 𝔀arnings. not proofread, reader lives far away from korea and has never been there, jaeyun walks reader out of the restaurant because, usually, oldies can't stand kissing in public, english is not my 1st language. 𝔀𝓬. 1,7k+ 𝓶asterlist.

♡ 𝓪melie's 𝓷ote: i am baack! back with a birthday headcanon for jake, a little bit late? yes, a little bit late, but, anyway, enjoy!

WHEN ENHYPEN'S COMEBACK WAS RELEASED, you couldn't hold your excitement for the boys and specially for your boyfriend. but, you as soon as you remembered jaeyun has to be in korea and promoting with the members for a bit of a while, you got a little upset. however you knew this was something you and jaeyun had talked about a long time ago: his schedule.

to be honest, jaeyun had never complained about you feeling upset against this whole situation since he were the first one to get all pouty and whiny about it. and throughout the years, when it was "jaeyun's birthday season", both of you tried their bests to keep contacting each other frequently or face timing each other too. this usually ended up in late night calls where your boyfriend would usually sleep; while you were talking about your day. you didn't mind this at all, until a certain limit was reached the distance actually became a main problem in the relationship.

that's why you decided to, instead of ordering a surprise cake for him or waiting for him to visit you, you booked a flight a week before to celebrate the day of his birthday with him; and visit korea for the very first time. and then, the next day you sent him a text, wishing him happy birthday like you always did.

― asshole. a spider-man lego set? pft...

you packed up your belonging and sent a message to one of the members saying that you were going to the airport and asking them to get everything ready.

you are probably wondering how’s the surprise going to happen, so, you asked jay to book a table — at night — at jaeyun's favourite restaurant like they always did. however, you would wear a waitress clothing and when it was time to sing happy birthday begin, you would be the waitress placing a cake at the table.

i know, sounds confusing, so just for a little bit of a context: you called the restaurant asking for extra waitress clothes, explaining about the surprise and the situation.

a few stress, naps and hours later, you arrived in korea. you couldn't speak korean very well, just a few words, so, getting a taxi was difficult, leading to a waste of your precious minutes. but, thankfully you were able to drive safely at the hotel you booked a room for the rest of your trip.

when you got in your room, you quickly changed after taking a bath and got yourself ready earlier, knowing you had to get at the restaurant an hour before the boys. you left the hotel and tried getting a taxi, however, jay texted you saying that he could pick you up, not wanting you to waste time; knowing how excited you were to see jaeyun. therefore, you sent him the address where you were staying and a few minutes a black car parked in front of you, and jay's masked figure appeared.

"hey, let's get going?" he patted your shoulder, nodding to his car.

you nodded, getting in the car. "how's he feeling?"

"oh gosh, when he woke up he was whining about not having you here," he began driving. "you know, nothing really new." you laughed.

"how do you think he'll react?"

"we'll see, but i pretty much think he's gonna be confused at the very start, then he'll realised and go like: "*gasp* baby!" ― just like that."

arriving at the restaurant, you started to feel nervous. excitement and anxiety just spread all over your body, even making your legs feel weaker and your hands shakier. but, there is no time for freaking out and no reason to feel like that, right? it's just your boyfriend haha...

you entered the restaurant like an abandoned puppy, scared of your surroundings since everything was new to you. people speaking another language and sometimes even looking at your weirdly. besides that, you went to talk to a nearby waitress and, even though she couldn't speak english very well, she managed to understand you and call the manager to help you.

"hello, nice to meet you," the manager spoke with a funny accent, still understandable. "my name is kim seong-ho and i am the manageah." he explained, spelling the last word with an accent.

"oh, nice to meet you," you smiled, shaking hands with mr. kim. "um, was that you who i talked on the phone a few days ago?"

"huh?" he seemed to have a hard time understanding your speaking. "sloweoh, pleaseu..."

"okay, so-"

oh gosh, everything happened in a blink of an eye. quickly summarizing everything: basically, the manager showed you where you were supposed to stay, where was the employees room where you could stay whenever you want, where you were supposed to take the orders ― of course you were table's seven special waitress ―, the bathroom and finally gave you the clothes.

you were at your spot wearing a hat, just to make sure your boyfriend couldn't tell who were you that quick. hearing a subtle ringing bell placed just above the restaurant's door ring, you discreetly looked over and saw the seven (7) boys standing there, waiting for the waitress to lead them to their table: the special table seven, served by a special waitress on a special day.

anyway, you felt a sight burning just above your head, making you look up with a slight move. you saw sunghoon and sunoo looking at you while giving you a excited discreet smile. seeing them happy about the situation made you feel even happier, already picturing jaeyun's big grin while hugging you and kissing you and- ugh... just everything!

you were holding a waiter tray, you were standing in front of the paying balcony and felt the waitress who just attended them poke your shoulder. she nodded at their table, like she was telling you: GO SERVE THEM NOW. and you thought like: wooooww... calm down baby girl, it's not that deep.

anyway, you walked over their table, trying your best to not reveal your face just yet while grabbing the menu for the whole group sitting on the table. "hello, here is our menu," you placed the menu on the table. "um, are you guys ready to order a drink? we have some good fine wine."

after they ordered their drink, you went and carefully placed each of them at the table. the other waiter has placed a small basked of bread on the table as an appetiser. "are you guys ready to order?"

they all ordered their meals and one thing you realised jaeyun didn't figure out was that you were speaking english. a table, with, apparently, just asians, in korea, a waitress speaking english...? doesn't make sense, but, anyway, it was working so... yeah? flex? maybe you were a good actress ― suck it up, riki!

you placed the order at the kitchen and before their plates could arrive at their tables ― knowing you had long minutes to enjoy ― you decided to reveal yourself to jaeyun, texting jay while you hid in the employees room, searching for your belongings. you brought from home a unusual bigger bag so you could fit your clothing and, specially, the spider-man lego set he asked for.

you grabbed the lego set and walked off of the room, taking a deep breath before walking back at the main dinner room. you saw them just chatting while waiting for their foods and as you watched them you saw your boyfriend's big grin, making your heart melt watching from afar.

you discreetly walked over their table hiding the building toy behind you, leading to others looking at you.

"excuse me," you spoke close to jaeyun. "a little bird told me it is your birthday, so..." you placed the spider-man lego at the table, in front of him.

he frowned before babbling. "wha-? how'd you- what is-" you took off your hat. "WHAT?" he screamed. "sorry..." standing up from his seat and apologising, jaeyun immediately looked at you and cupped your cheeks, like he was trying to feel if it was real or if he were dreaming about this again.

"baby!" he whispered-yelled, holding your hand and walking out of the restaurant. "my baby! are you really here?" are you real?! am i tripping or-" kiss.

"hi." you smiled at him and you felt his warmth as he hugged you, tightly.

"my baby..." his choked voice was muffled by the thick jumper you were wearing, due to korea's cold weather.

"hi, i am right here," you caressed his hair. "come on, give me a kiss." and he did so, savouring this sweet moment he has been dreaming about and wanting to have for a long time.

"i missed you," his teary eyes and wet cheeks showed how much he craved you. "i missed you so much, you have no idea." he smiled, analysing your face while cupping them, quickly smooching you again, making you smile while kissing.

"i love you,"

"i love you more,"

"happy birthday."

"happy birthday too- oh wait, never mind, happy birthday to me... too...?" he frowned, trying to find the right words, but nothing else came to his mind since it was filled with: you, you, you and you, and y/n, a.k.a, you! "yeah, i guess so, happy birthday to me!"

bonus scene! ⭑

"do you like what i got for you?"

hours later everyone went to their dorm, however, of course jaeyun wanted to stay with you, going to the hotel where you were staying. your boyfriend has just opened the lego set you got for him, and you saw how his eyes were shining bright like an ocean of precious diamonds.

"it's so pretty," he replied, amused. "just like you, by the way." he blinked at you, making you let out a chuckle and blush.

"we can eat some cake tomorrow, sorry i didn't brought you any," you pouted.

"babe," he turned at you, embracing you onto his arms, looking down at your face and slightly chuckling because you looked so cute pouting while your cheeks were being squished against his chest. "you are the only thing i need, and, also, you already brought the cake and i can have it tonight; what are you even talking about..." he smirked, but playfully asked nonchalant.

"are we talking about my a-"

© 𝓪𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐢𝓮, 𝗺𝗹𝘆𝘀𝗰𝗵𝗮 𝗌𝓽𝓾𝖽𝗂𝗈𝓼. ⋆

[sant-riley]

[Random Task force 141 × gen z! member headcanons]

A/N: Reader goes by the codename Teddy in my writing! Along with she/her pronouns :) I am also extremely biased with Ghost so her main pairing is more towards with him compared to the others <3. I know absolutely nothing about the military so this is not accurate I am so sorry💀.

CWs: Dark Humor, Age gaps, Simping, crude humor, cursing. (not sure what else but lmk!)

Chances are, you're the youngest in the entirety of Task Force 141. Just a good couple of years younger than Gaz.

When Laswell brought her in to meet the group, they couldn't help but stare at her in confusion. A tiny girl who couldn't have been older than any of them. Soap couldn't help but chuckle while Ghost nudged him in the side to shut him up.

"This is your new rookie on the team, her callsign is Teddy. Treat her well."

All the men nodded, watching the younger woman shyly smile and wave towards them.

First they realized that her humor was, in Ghost's words, fucked.

Any minor inconvenience had her saying she wanted to be hit by a car or some type of bodily harm, Price quickly whirling around with eyes widened. "Now, I don't think that warranted that kind of response, don't you think?" "Oh it definitely did, Captain." And she'd walk away without another word.

He swears he gets gray hairs from everytime you make casual talk of you dying. He actively tells the others to check on you bc he genuinely don't know if you're serious or not.

Ghost is not up to date with shit, man uses no social medias oncesoever so everything she spouts is wildly out of pocket. References to basic things like tiktok, Twitter, Instagram? He just silently stares at you like you're on drugs. You can't really use your personal phone on base but you try your best to explain memes to him. He sighs and rubs his forehead with a groan of "I'm too old for this shit, teds." "Oh come on! You have to at LEAST know the meme about the marines eating crayons!" "What the fuck are you on about?

The only ones who know vaguely what the fuck you're on about sometimes are Gaz and Soap, despite them still being a few years older.

Granted, they are not caught up with everything but they actively make it a point on leave to try and be up to date bc of you and your mannerisms. Plus it makes you happy when they fire back a quote they learned.

Can yall imagine Soap on tiktok, what random shit he'd have on his fyp bc he doesn't know how the algorithm works 😭.

Teddy has made every single one of them a personal playlist when she does have her phone, Soap once caught her adding songs and hasn't stopped teasing her since. Price and Ghost pretend not to care and barks at Soap to leave her alone but they're equally curious. Ghost contemplates stealing her phone to see it.

Doesn't matter how serious or dark their job may be, you simp for fictional characters, loudly. Price has learned to tune it out, Ghost although slightly jealous, finds it endearing, Gaz and Soap indulge you and will actively ask about why you like the characters you do and how much you love them bc they like to see you excited. It's a nice feeling when they're always in life or death missions.

You're the smallest one in here okay, everyone can easily throw you without batting an eye so they all take turns training you! They all despite knowing you can take care of yourself, would still like to teach you all they know so should you come against a taller/stronger opponent, you'll be okay.

You are the most protected person in the entire squad, esp when going out for drinks, Ghost will put you in the middle between him and Price and basically make a wall of muscle around you. He says he doesn't care and that he just doesn't want to be pestered by creepy people coming up to you but he will literally stare down any man or woman who even tries. He is the creepy one in everyone else's scenario. Soap just laughs and tosses back his drink.

They all notice your ticks and tells, seeing your leg start to shake when you're anxious, when you start cracking your fingers when you're restless, how you will avoid eye contact at any cost. They start to find ways to soothe you in their own ways. Price will give you a pat on your shoulder, sending you a smile.

Gaz nudges you with his body to take your attention off the situation, or he'll simply start asking you random dumbass questions just to see your face change.

Soap will, if he has gotten permission before, just pick you up and throw you over his shoulder, running around with you while you scream for him to let you go. Is also not against tickling you straight up to get you to smile.

Ghost tried to be as subtle as he can be. If yall are sitting close to each other, he'll make sure some part of his body is gently pressed against yours. Whether it be his foot, thigh, hand, some part of him will ground you. You try and reassure him that you know he doesn't care for personal touch but he just says to shut up.

Meeting Graves was a trip, for everyone involved besides you and Grave. Absolutely having no control over calling him a irl Fix it Felix. You were on Graves shitlist and honestly you wouldn't be surprised he betrayed yall for that one comment bc of how angry it made him.

Constantly being told to be quiet, but you cannot help it and will make little quips over comms. Ghost takes after you and starts to say horrible "dad" jokes that make you choke trying to hold back. Soap hates both of you and calls you unfunny.

They realize you're impulsive, especially when you show the amount of tattoos you have.

"I joined the military to fund my tattoo addiction." "You know what? That's not even a surprise."

Going home on leave is always a bitter experience, you never look excited to go home. So one of the guys (usually ghost) will offer you to come with them. It helps 3/4 all live somewhere in England so it's easy to see them/ take trips to their place.

They're all attached despite knowing better. They can't help it and they know they care for you so much more than other force members.

Ghost and Soap bristle when Alejandro makes a mention that he'd offer you a spot in his team, impressed with how you can take opponents twice your size.

"¿Te interesaría quedarte en México?"

"The Hell she will."

-

If you'd like to be tagged in future works, please comment under my rules that are pinned to my blog!

[charlotteking23]

Forgotten Lunch (Bruce Wayne x Wife! Reader)

You were driving in the car, with a sack lunch in the passenger street. Bruce had forgotten to take his lunch and being a thoughtful wife decided to bring it to him.

You were excited you rarely went to Wayne Enterprise because your job hours were the same as Bruce's. You had a day off, and right after you dropped his lunch, you were going to the nail salon.

You parked the car towards the back having less of a hassle to find a spot. Walking in you were immediately greeted by some of the employees who recognized you and saw them pointing at you, but you didn't mind being used to it.

The sound of your high heels echoes through the lobby towards the receptionist. The lady looked up, you could tell she seemed shy. "Hello, I was wondering if Mr.Wayne was in any meeting right now", You said softly. "No, Ma'am, Mr Wayne should be expecting you", she said carefully, scared she might say something wrong. You nodded at her and thanked her as you walked towards the elevator.

When the elevator opened you were surprised to see a lady being rude to the employees. Before you could say something the rude lady saw you and pulled you by the arm making your back slam against the wall. Oh hell no you thought This lady must really want an ass kicking.

"I am Miranda, the Wayne Enterprises manager, which means I ensure, no new employees cause any trouble", Miranda said in a snooty tone. Before I could slap this bitch she looked me up and down in disgust was, this bitch. "Who are you trying to impress with all that makeup and this dress, here we have a standard procedure of no makeup and uniform", that bitch Miranda says as rudely as possible.

"Say that to all that cake-on makeup you have on your face, who are you trying to impress?" you said as you inspected her horrifying face wishing you brought your channel sunglasses. Trying to divert the attention off of her she commented on my food. "Who made that the rat", Miranda said as if it was even a good comeback. "No, but even a rat can make better food than you", you replied fed up with this girl's behavior.

But again this bitch just keeps on talking, you were about to take your louis vuitton high heel off and stab her eye with it but then it would be a waste of a good heel. "What can you do? you are just a lowly employee", Miranda says with such confidence. "Miranda-", Bruce says but was cut off by the wicked witch of the west(Miranda). " Oh Mr. Wayne it's good to see you", Miranda said in a flirty tone. It's funny how fast that girl switches up when my man comes.

"Miranda!", Bruce yelled stopping Miranda in shock. "This lowly employee you spoke to was my wife", Bruce said with a stern tone not taking shit from anybody. This was a complete shock to Miranda as she started to stutter, "I-I-I didn't know I am so sorry Mr and Mrs Wayne", red in the checks from being embarrassed by the mistake.

"I don't care Miranda this is not the first time I've heard complaints like these before I decided to not do anything because of how dedicated you were but now that has changed", Bruce said with anger in his eyes. "What do you mean s-sir", Miranda said as if she was going to cry. "You are fired, I suggest you pack your things now or I will call security", Bruce said as calmly as he could but anger shown in his eyes. Miranda ran away as fast as possible, away from the peering eyes.

Bruce was quick to apologize to all the employees who were tormented by Miranda, knowing Bruce he probably promised something really expensive for them to take as an apology.

Bruce then looks at his wife taking her by the hand and leading her to the office. "Are you okay? what are you doing here? Do you want some water or anything?", Bruce said scanning Me from head to toe making sure there were no injuries. "I came to drop off your lunch you forgot to bring", you said smiling up at Bruce. All he could do was laugh and talk to you for the remainder of the time til he had to return to work.

"You know Mr.Wayne", you said holding his hand as he walked with you towards the car." What Mrs.Wayne?" He said playfully. "You were really hot when you were taking charge", you said fanning yourself. "Maybe I should do that more often" Bruce said, cupping your checks and giving you a peck on the lips. "Definitely," you said as you pulled him back giving him a passionate kiss on his lips.

[fallstaticexit]

Prev / Next / Beginning

TW: Self Harm Mentioned/Implied

AN: next update our ladies will have a proper reunion but first tree farm tree farm! (Even though only the poor kids- and Bob- are the only ones super excited about it)

Transcript under the cut

Nancy Narrates: [All those years I’ve spent yearning, wanting, my whole self calling for her—and now she’s here]

Nancy Narrates: [This isn’t a dream. She’s here. I can feel the warmth in her cheek]

Nancy: I- I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to- I don’t know why I did that. I shouldn’t have-

Vanessa: [laughs] It’s ok, Nancy! It’s good to see you too.

Vanessa: Wow, look at you. You’re all grown up, aren’t you?

Nancy: I- I-

Vanessa: Still filled to the brim with tears too.

Nancy: [softly] Sorry. I thought.. I thought I’d never see you again.

Vanessa: 16 years is a long time. I was worried you would have forgotten all about me.

Nancy: I could never forget you.

Vanessa: I’ve come all this way to see you.

Nancy: Have you really?

Vanessa: I know it’s been years, but I was hoping we could reconnect. I’m staying at the Fyres Hotel. Maybe we could have dinner there tonight. Catch up?

Nancy Narrates: [I had to physically restrain myself from saying yes. I realized, after all these years, I still would have followed her anywhere...but it can’t be this way. Not anymore..]

Nancy: [exhales] I can’t. I’m sorry. I had plans.

Vanessa: Ah! Well. I did pop in last minute. Maybe some other-

Nancy: You could come with me! I mean, If you like? We’re supposed to get a Christmas tree for the house; trying to set new traditions and what not.

Nancy: It’s silly but it’s important to them- my sons. I have two boys, by the way. I have to do this for them but- you’re here and I don’t know if I can see you leave again. God, am I rambling too much?

Vanessa: You want me to go tree shopping with you and your children?

Nancy: [blushes] Will you?

Vanessa: Lead the way.

-

Malcolm: What’s taking that lady so long!

Jonathan: Should we try and call mom again?

Geoffrey: [hums noncommittally]

Malcolm: He’s not even listening!

Bob: Hellooo? Earth to Geoffrey?

Bob: Iggy say, ‘what’s eatin’ ya, Uncle G?’

Iggy: [coos]

Geoffrey: Heh, sorry! Sorry. I guess I got alot on my mind right now.

Eliza: Is everything ok?

Geoffrey: Oh, yeah! Yeah, yeah- well...I guess I’m thinking about Nance?

Eliza: What’s wrong with Nancy?

Geoffrey: I’ve been thinking about what happened on our anniversary trip.

Bob: Yeah? What was it?

Malcolm: Mommy’s here!! Mommy’s here!!

Malcolm: Er, who’s that with my mommy?

Bob: Well, I’ll be damned! Talk about a throwback!

Eliza: [whistles] Oh, wow! Who is that? Is she a model?: Well, I’ll be damned! Talk about a throwback!

Geoffrey: Vanessa Villareal?

Nancy: These are my sons, Jonathan and Malcolm.

Vanessa: Oh! Oh, Nancy, they are beautiful.

Malcolm: Who are you, lady!

Nancy: Don’t be rude, darling. Vanessa is- was- she’s my..

Vanessa: I’m your mother’s best friend.

Jonathan: I’m Jonathan, but call me Johnny. This loud mouth is Malcolm.

Vanessa: Johnny it is. You must get those cool, blue eyes from your mom’s brother.

Jonathan: You knew my Uncle Nathan?

Vanessa: No, but I saw a picture once, a long time ago.

Vanessa: [turns to Malcolm] And you look just like your mother.

Malcolm: Are you a movie star too?

Vanessa: [chuckles] No, I’m not a movie star.

Malcolm: Then who are you lady?

Vanessa: I’m your Auntie V. You can call me that, if you like.

Malcolm: Aunt V, are you gonna pick out a tree with us?

Vanessa: You bet. You should know, I have a keen eye.

Nancy: Sorry I’m late..

Geoffrey: Better late than never. I see you had an eventful day.

Malcolm: No more talking! Let’s go already!

Jonathan: I want to find our tree with mom!

Malcolm: Well I’m taking daddy!

Bob: Alright! Long time no see, VV! Man, it’s been a while, huh?

Vanessa: Just V is fine. Billy, right?

Bob: [sighs] It’s Bobby. This is my wife, Eliza and this cool guy is Iggy.

Vanessa: [sheepishly] Right. Nice to meet you. Wasn’t there another one of you?

Bob: [chuckles] Cassie. We still keep in touch. She’s a travel blogger now. And I’m sure you remember ol’ Geoffrey here.

Geoffrey: Good seeing you, Vanessa.

Vanessa: Likewise.

Bob: Heck yeah! Let the festivities begin!

-

Jonathan: This one! This is the perfect tree, right, Mom?

Nancy: Mhm. Yes, that’s nice- I’ll be right back.

Jonathan: Oh..

Bob: Alright, what’s going on? You can tell me, it’s just us guys now, and Iggy here is great at keeping secrets.

Geoffrey: Nance was so sad on our trip, sadder than usual. I haven’t seen her so low since- well, since Vanessa left. And she kept apologizing to me.

Bob: You’ve mentioned before she gets in a mood sometimes, right?

Geoffrey: Well, yeah... that’s not all. I saw these bruises on the inside of her thigh.

Bob: [eyes widen] You think she’s hurting herself?

Geoffrey: Is that it, you think? At first I thought they were- you know, hickies?

Bob: Whoa. Hickies? On Nancy?

Geoffrey: [snorts] That’s crazy, right?

Bob: You should talk to her. If she is harming herself, you should get her help, bud.

Geoffrey: And if it’s not that...

Bob: Then, that’s another kind of conversation. But this is Nancy we’re talking about. You two have been bit by the love bug since high school. I can’t imagine her having an affair with some other guy.

-

Nancy: Hi.

Vanessa: Hi.

Nancy: Sorry if I’m being...odd. I guess, I’m still getting used to seeing you.

Vanessa: I don’t think you’re being odd. I think you’re being you.

Nancy: Is that a bad thing?

Vanessa: [giggles] No, not at all. You haven’t changed and it’s refreshing.

Nancy: Ah. Well. You haven’t either. I mean..you still feel like my Vanessa.

Nancy Narrates: [All those questions I craved answers for came rushing back to me the more I looked at her. Was my loving her just a girlish memory of our past? Did she ever hear my voicemail? Was it worth mentioning after almost 2 decades apart? After I’ve already married and had children? After I’ve sworn to dedicate my all to them-]

Vanessa: So, about that dinner. Are you free tonight?

[911-ls-whats-your-emergency]

Has anyone written this season from Tommy’s POV yet?? Because if so please tag me, but in the meantime I just had to outline the crazy sequence of events from his POV:

- Haven’t heard from the 118 in years and suddenly Howie is asking me to fly them into a hurricane

- But also we gotta wait for Hen but you’re gonna need to go get her so we can dramatically surprise her from inside the helicopter

- Can’t believe these losers were actually right and we just found an overturned cruise ship

- Start talking to Eddie in the aftermath and have so much in common, exchange numbers so we can hang out

- A day later Evan Buckley calls the station and asks if he can come by for a tour whenever I’ve got some free time and he seems cool too so why not

- My buddy in Vegas gets awesome tickets to the fight and convinces me to fly out and hey Eddie mentioned he’s into MMA right?

- Evan is super excited about everything but also doesn’t really seem like he’d actually want to switch stations so that’s odd - but hey flying is awesome and I can’t resist a little eye candy so I’ll offer to teach him

- Fight is awesome. Eddie is awesome. New friends are awesome and it’s rare that you have so much in common with someone so we are BFFs now

- Vibes at basketball were strange?? Apparently Evan doesn’t usually play but he shows up and gets really intense and I end up having to take Eddie to get his ankle patched up

- Painkiller!Eddie starts mumbling about how this is all his fault and he knows how Buck gets jealous and….oh now I feel bad

- Let me go to Evan’s place and clear the air - didn’t mean to cause all this drama I just wanted all the new friends

- I might be reading this wrong but Evan is flirting with me…? While also talking about Eddie way too much??

- Okay he is definitely flirting with me but also I am still not convinced he was jealous over me

- But also how can you not kiss a guy like that when he’s flirting with you and then rambling??

- Damn I really hope that was okay because I did not give him a lot of warning

- 😁😁 it was okay

- Gotta get out of here before I get distracted by kissing this man and miss my shift

- But can’t let Evan overthink it too much so make sure I secure a date before I go

- Oops almost forgot I came here to fix what I broke between him and Eddie - one last reminder and we’re good!

- Can’t wait for Saturday…

[irishmammonagenda]

How I Think The Obey Me Boys Would React to The Rumours™️

Summary: Rumours have been floating around the Devildom. Rumours about a certain Angel and Sorcerer...how will the demon brothers react? Word Count: haha great question Content Warnings: probably just swearing tbh Disclamer: This will probably not make a lot of sense unless you've read this fic here for context, but ykw life doesnt make sense you do you <3

[dateables & co version]

post dividers by @cafekitsune their post dividers r really cool check them out! (also sorry for the tag!!)

You had left the Sorcerers' Society feeling quite flustered, but also extremely pleased with yourself. Take that Solomon. You grin. In all the excitement of the following days, you'd forgotten about the rumour you had accidentally spread around the Devildom. Perhaps you shouldn't've pretended to be Archangel Michael to gain entry....

💙💙LUCIFER💙💙

When Lucifer heard the news from Beel, he was in the student council room, he turnt his D.D.D off and just placed his head in his hands.

Was this some elaborate scheme by Solomon to gain a pact with him?

Lucifer wasn't sure he even wanted to know.

Sighing; he pulled on his coat and traversed to Purgatory Hall where Michael was staying.

"Michael." The Avatar of Pride stood leaning against the kitchen counter, everyone else in Purgatory Hall was at RAD, so the Angel and Demon were alone. "Oh Jesus Christ!" The Angel in question brings a hand to his heart in mock dramatics, "Warn a guy next time Lucikins!" "..." The Silence was palpable. "...Lucikins?" Lucifer gritted out, his eye twitching. "Michael. This is not the time for your games. I am the Avatar of Pride and a Prince of Hell, show me some respect." Michael merely raised an arched eyebrow, a shit-eating grin on his face as he quickly closed the distance between them, pulling the Avatar of Pride into an ironclad headlock, bringing his other arm over with a clenched fist and messing up Lucifer's hair. "I'm sure you are Lucikins, but you're still my adorable little brother." Lucifer pushes his hands out in an attempt to get away, but even he had to admit, Michael had always been stronger than him. "Michael." The younger protests, "I swear to Lord Diavolo if you do not let me go, I will-" Michael interrupts him, pausing his brotherly tormenting to wipe a tear from his ruby red eyes. "-Ahh! You must've missed me so much, poor Wittle Wucifer! Always so heavy on the teenage angst!" Lucifer growled in a way too similar to Satan when he first fell. Like father, like son. "I don't have teenage angst. Now unhand me you bastard!" "Oh please! The amount of times I caught you in the Celestial Realm listening to My Chemical Romance and Panic at the Disco on repeat speaks for itself! And the eyeliner! Just because the others were too young to remember doesn't mean I was baby brother! Don't think I don't remember the wolf-cut!" Lucifer's eye twitches so hard he worries for his socket. He cab't even refute it. "You are two minutes older than me! And besides! I came here to talk about the rumours of you dating Solomon!" "The What." Michael immediately ceases all noogie-ing, his grip loose enough for Lucifer to slip through his arm. He scowls, smoothing the wrinkles from his suit and beginning to fix his hair. He moves a safe distance away from his older (estranged) brother. "The rumours of you showing up during a Sorcerers' Society meeting and making out with Solomon on his lap. Ring a bell?" Michael, for the love of him, just looks confused. "But I've never even-" He blinks slowly a few times. "I am going to kill MC." Lucifer, even with the ego bruising he had just endured, laughs, partly out of sheer relief, he doesn't want to imagine what a Solomon Michael duo could be capable of. But of course it was you. It always was.

💛💛MAMMON💛💛

HUH???!!!

This poor man's confusion is so strong.

He doesn't want to think about Michael's lovelife. Or Solomon's for that matter.

He immediately rushes to tell you.

"Oi! MC!" Mammon shoves his way into your room like he was auditioning for the walking dead, as per usual, he wasn't aware of the marvellous invention of knocking yet. You quickly closed you laptop lid, and placed the device down beside you on the bed, lest he saw the Archangel Michael/King Solomon 100k, Slowburn, Angst with a Happy Ending you were writing on HellO3. “Hi Mams!” Mammon scurries onto your bed like the floor is lava, resting his chin on your thigh and looking up at you with his usual puppy eyes. “Yer not gonna believe this MC.” He says seriously. "What's up?" You tilt your head, bringing a one of your hands to ruffle your First Man's hair, he leans into the touch happily before jumping up and acting like he wasn't. "Well, 'pparently Michael's after starting te date Solomon. Can ye believe it?" Mammon makes a face. "Michael...wi' Solomon...I don' wanna believe it...just...its mingin'..." You laugh nervously, "I don't think Michael's dating Solomon, Mams....someone must've uhh..." You hold in a laugh. "It's probably just a succubi or someone looking for chaos." Mammon nods seriously, laying his head back on your lap. "Yer prolly righ' MC." You pet his hair again, "Wanna watch a movie or something, Mams?" "Pffft- Of course ya would wanna watch a movie wi' the Great Mammon...alrigh' huma-...Angel...I'll allow it...!" He says with his usual bravado, it was almost convincing, if he hadn't nuzzled further into your hand, and he wasn't looking at you like you were the one reason his pulse was still going.

🧡🧡LEVIATHAN🧡🧡

He finds out after the first chapter to a certain Archangel Michael/King Solomon fanfic was published. Yes he is subscribed to your HellO3 account, and yes! he has emails turnt on.

What kind of person would he be if he didn't read his Henry's fanfics?!

He throws his phone across the room.

When he finally wills himself to get up and retrieve it, he takes a screenshot and starts texting you frantically.

You're lazing about on your bed dong nothing, you'd just posted the first chapter of THE FORBIDDEN FRUITS: A GAY ROMANCE STORY THAT TRANSCENDS REALMS five minutes previous when your DDD began vibrating at such a speed you almost made a very unfunny sex joke. You pick up your DDD and sure enough, its Levi, heh; so he is subscribed to your HellO3 account! Leviachan <3: MC WHAT IS THIS NDVNRO DID YOU WRIT E FNAFICTION AOBOUT MCIAHEL AND SOLOMOMN You grinned. You: Fnaf fiction? Good idea for an AU! Leviachan <3: VFIBNODNORNGVNO MC IM LOOKING ON FORUMS WDYM THERES A RUMOU R ABORUT SOLOMON AND MICHAEL DATING You: In my defense, it was Solomon's fault. There's no response for 10 minutes, until your DDD pings again. Leviachan <3: Why is the fanfic good Leviachan <3: I MEAN OFC ITD BE GOOD, YOU WROTE IT BUT Leviachan <3: ITS SO Leviachan <3: THE CHARACTERS ARE SO COMPELLING AND THE PLOT IS SO GOOD RJRGNVDON Leviachan <3: AND THE TENSION??!! You grinned, you could always count on your Lord of Shadows to hype up your degenerate fanfics. You: thanks <3 satan's helping me write it, wanna help? Leviachan <3: I don't think I could write as good as you guys, im just a stinky smelly worthless otaku :( You: nuhuh. >:( Leviachan <3: But if you wanted... I could maybe beta-read??? You: OFC YOU CAN LEVI TANK YOU <33333 Leviachan <3: Haha tank LMAO ROFL You: I can never mispell anything around anyone in this house You kicked your feet like a catholic school girl holding hands with a boy for the first time in her life, knowing Levi probably was too.

💚💚SATAN💚💚

This man has a web of connections.

He found out almost as soon as the rumour started.

Like Mammon, he immediately finds you to tell you

Unlike Mammon, he actually knocks

granted he knocks for a second before just opening your door so he could've just not knocked and it would've had the same affect.

"Hello MC" "Mornin' Satie...What time's it?" You rub your eyes tiredly, having just woken up from a nap, you sit up and blink at him slowly with sleepy eyes. Satan can't stop himself from cooing, he movies towards your bed and ruffles your hair like you're a cat, you lean into the touch. "Sorry for waking you, dear..." You yawn. "You're fine Satie...what'd you need?" "Have you heard the rumours that Michael and Solomon are secret lovers-" Suddenly you're wide awake. "Oh no. Oh no no no." Satan raises a brow, "What's wrong, MC?" You grin sheepishly, "I maybe might've accidentally not on purpose started that rumour?..." Satan laughs in your face. Handsome bastard. "It's not funny!" "It is a little funny..." You gasp, eyes lighting up mischievously, "We should write a fanfic!" Satan tilts his head, "And why would we do that?" "Because the world deserves a Slowburn Michael x Solomon fic?" "Nope." "Pleaseee Satan! I'll pay you!" "Nope." "It'll annoy Luci?" "Tempting..." "I'll give you a kiss?" "I'm in. Let's write the best Michael x Solomon the Devildom's ever seen." You shake Satan's hand. Maybe you should've been reincarnated as a demon.

🩷🩷ASMODEUS 🩷🩷

Finds out through one of his gossip circles relatively fast.

He wants to get more details so he can tell you later! <3

By far one of the more supportive brothers

So he finds Solomon, who knows maybe he could give some advice!

Michael was strange, but he was always nice to Asmo growing up in the celestial realm, he might as well make sure one of his best friends is treating his former brother right <3

"Hiya Sol!~" Asmo smiles excitedly, pulling the sorcerer in for a hug, pouting when he pulled away again. "I cant believe you never told me! Ugh~...you must've been scared I wouldn't accept you!~ Poor thing...~" Solomon blinks slowly, his usual shit-eating grin replaced with pure confusion, lost in his own rant, Asmo doesn't notice. "Well! You have my blessing!~" "For what?" "For your relationship with Michael, silly!~" Asmo giggles, Solomon takes a deep breath. "For my what." A pause pauses all sound for a moment, only for a moment, before like all other moments, they begin the cycle of movemnt again. Solomon nods rather calmly, "Maybe I shouldn't have turnt MC into a sheep....or maybe I should do it again as payback...." He says to himself Asmo sighs, so it was just a rumour then....

He does still post a link to your fanfic on his Devilgram story, because he's so supportive! <3

No one tell Michael, or Lucifer pretty please

❤️❤️BEELZEBUB❤️❤️ & 💜💜BELPHEGOR💜💜

Being a member of the Anti-Lucifer League, Satan told Belphie who told Beel after taking a nap.

Beel, being the absolute legend that he is didn't really have any opinions on it. As long as they're happy :)

Belphie sits in on the fanfic plot planning sessions you and Satan host, with Beel sometimes joining and giving surprisingly interesting plot twists.

Belphie cackles when Beel tells Lucifer of the rumours, shortly before the first chapter of Forbidden Fruits is published.

Satan and You stand by the whiteboard in the attic, various spider diagrams and bullet points are written messily upon it, only this time, it's not a plan to 'prank' Lucifer. (Are they really pranks if they never succeed?) The sound of munching can be heard as Beel works away happily on a bag of crisps, offering everyone some as you work. "What if we made Solomon run after Michael in the rain." Belphie drawls out lazily, not even looking up from where he lies beside Beel. You stare at Belphie, "What is with you and the people chasing after people in the rain trope?" Belphie sticks his tongue out at you in response. Beel shakes his head. "That wouldn't be accurate. Michael hates getting his hair wet." Belphie smiles, "Good point Beel." Satan makes a sound of contemplation. "What if...we had Michael chase Solomon in the rain instead? The fact he hates getting his hair wet could show just how much he loves Solomon..." You laugh, imagining the scene in your head. "But why is Michael chasing Solomon?" Belphie smirks, "Because Michael said something bad about humans during a fight, Solomon got upset and ran like a maiden." Beel stops munching on his snacks, looking down approvingly at his twin. "That's really smart Belphie." "Thanks Beel." Belphie grins. "Yeah Belph, your angstiness is really paying off." You tease. "Oh shut up MC." He glares at you, but there's no real weight behind it. "Theyre right you know." Satan smirks. "I heard you blasting Paramore and MCR earlier." "Its good music!"Belphie says definsively. "Besides, it keeps me awake. Goodnight." He mutters, laying his head on his twins lap before closing his eyes. Five minutes of silence later, Beel opens his mouth, "He does wear eyeliner a lot when he's in our room y'know?" "Beel!" You and Satan laugh, Beel just smiles happily at everyone getting along. Belphie devises a plan to make you dream pigeons are going to take over the world tonight as payback.

im on a Lucifer being bullied by Michael spree rn 🧍‍♂️ also you can't convince me that Satan and Belphie aren't soso similar to Lucifer bc at the end of the day they're all just angsty emo teens &lt;3

[meazalykov]

commercial

alessia russo x actress!reader (requested)

summary: pairing up with a footballer for a commercial changed your life

based off of the adidas commercial she was featured in before the women's world cup in 2023

you never thought filming a commercial would bring you to london. 

being an actress with a hit hbo series and a partnership with adidas kept you busy, traveling constantly between coasts, countries, and continents. 

this job felt different. you’d always admired women’s sports, so when your agent called you with the news that adidas wanted you for their new campaign promoting the women's world cup, it felt like an honor. 

empowering women, celebrating athletes—it was something you could get behind since its what you cared about. you said yes without a second thought. 

now, with a plane ticket in hand, you were ready to make it happen.

the moment you step off the plane at heathrow, london’s summer breeze hits you—crisp, slightly cool, and carrying the scent of rain and freshly brewed coffee. your driver, an older man with a kind smile, helps load your bags, and you’re soon winding your way through the city streets. 

as you look out the car window, everything feels vibrant and alive. red double-decker buses whizz by, people spill out of cafes, and there's a constant hum in the air. 

despite being a little jet-lagged, you’re excited—more excited than you've been for a job in a long time.

the next morning, you arrive on set for the commercial shoot, and it’s a whirlwind of motion—producers barking orders, cameras being set up, and the smell of fragrancelingering in the air. 

a production assistant greets you almost the second you step out of your car, a polite smile on their face, speaking rapidly into their headset.

"y/n, so glad you could make it! we’re just about to start introducing everyone. can i take you to meet the other talents– the footballers i shall say?”

you nod, straightening your posture and reminding yourself to relax.

 

just another job, just another set. yet the excitement buzzing in the air makes your nerves tingle. the assistant leads you toward the back of the set, where a few women stand, laughing easily with one another. 

you recognize them immediately.. lena oberdorf, mary fowler, and alessia russo. you’d seen their photos in the media. never having enough time to watch ninety minutes of football, you still knew how good they were.

lena is first to notice you. 

“y/n!! you’re kidding?!!” she says to mary with a friendly smile, sticking her hand out. “nice to meet you.”

you shake her hand, grinning. “nice to meet you too. i’m a big fan of your game.”

“and i am a big fan of yours!!” lena says, seeming genuinely pleased. “looking forward to working with you today. the concept seems fun.”

mary and alessia both chime in their greetings.

there’s a moment of small talk as you chat about the campaign, the concept, and the filming schedule. but as you exchange introductions, your eyes keep drifting back to alessia. 

there’s something about her that draws you in—something in the way she carries herself, confident yet laid-back, with a gaze that's intense but kind. and when her eyes meet yours, you swear you see a flash of something else, something that makes your heart skip.

“so, you’re an actress..” alessia says finding small talk, leaning in a little closer. her voice has a certain lilt to it. warm, curious.

“yeah,” you reply, trying to keep your voice steady, 

“i’ve been working in television for a while, but this is my second sports commercial.”

“oh, really?” alessia tilts her head, her blonde hair falling to the side as she studies you. 

“guess we’re both kind of stepping into each other’s worlds for this one. i’ve never done a commercial myself unless it was for arsenal.”

“well, from what i’ve heard, you’ll be great,” you say, and it’s not just a compliment. you mean it. 

you’ve heard from your assistant about alessia playing for the england national team. she must be amazing. 

alessia chuckles softly, and you catch the way her eyes sparkle, like she's genuinely enjoying the conversation.

“we’ll see,” she says, that easy confidence still there but with a playful glint. 

“just don’t laugh at me if i mess up my lines.”

you shake your head, laughing. “only if you promise not to laugh at me trying to dribble a football.”

“deal,” alessia says, flashing you a grin that makes you wonder just how often she uses that smile to get what she wants. 

there’s something magnetic about her, and as much as you try to focus on the task at hand, your mind keeps circling back to her.

soon, it’s time to start filming, and the director calls everyone to their positions. the first scene you're shooting together is a lighthearted setup in a grocery store, meant to highlight how sports are part of everyday life. 

you and alessia are supposed to be casually shopping, pretending to pick out items until a boy accidentally passes a football to alessia, who starts dribbling the ball fantastically.

the idea is to show how these footballers are stars both on and off the pitch—effortlessly cool, effortlessly themselves.

you’re on the camera for the attention, the familiarity of many people seeing one of their favorite actresses on screen. 

as the cameras roll, you find yourself struggling to stay in character—not because you're nervous, but because you're genuinely awestruck. 

alessia makes it all look so easy. she maneuvers the ball around her feet effortlessly, as if it’s a natural extension of her body, and at one point, she jumps up and crosses her legs to move the ball up in a seamless move. 

the crew claps and cheers after the director says cut, and you have to remind yourself to look casual, to pretend like this is something you see every day.

"you okay there?" alessia whispers when you find yourself staring for a second too long. 

"yeah, totally," you reply, trying to play it off. "just, you know, impressed. you're kind of amazing."

“kind of?” she teases, raising an eyebrow. “i’ll take that, i guess.”

you both laugh, and the rest of the shoot continues with an easy flow. 

the chemistry between you translates on camera, and the director nods approvingly after each take. 

by the time you wrap for the day, you're already regretting that it has to end so soon.

as everyone’s packing up, alessia walks over to you, her expression a mix of mischief and curiosity. 

“hey, i know you’re busy with your job but... do you have any plans while you're here in london?”

“not really,” you say, glancing down as you fidget with your hands. 

“i have some interviews coming up in new york soon, but other than that, i’m kind of free.”

“oh,” she says, her voice light but her eyes steady on yours. 

“how about we grab dinner tonight? there’s this great italian spot not too far from here—i thought it might be nice to hang out without all of the chaos.”

you don’t even have to think about it. “yeah, i’d like that a lot.”

later that evening, alessia takes you to a cozy restaurant tucked away in a quiet corner of london. 

it’s intimate, dimly lit, with exposed brick walls and a menu that makes your mouth water the second you open it. the conversation flows easily—surprisingly easily—and you talk about everything from football and acting to travel, family, and your favorite shows outside of the ones you’ve been in. 

it feels like you’ve known each other for longer than a day.

“so, you travel a lot for work,” alessia says at one point, sipping on her lemon water. 

“ever get tired of it?”

“sometimes,” you admit. 

“but it’s also kind of amazing. i mean, many people would do anything for the opportunities that i’ve been given—like getting to meet people like you for example.”

alessia laughs softly, shaking her head. “you’re flattering me.”

“maybe,” you say with a playful smile, “but it’s the truth.”

alessia leans back in her chair, and there’s a look in her eyes you can't quite place—somewhere between admiration and something deeper, something that makes your stomach flip. 

“you know, you’re not what i expected,” she says, voice gentle but sincere.

“what do you mean?” you ask, genuinely curious.

“i don’t know, someone... a little more hollywood, i guess?” she shrugs.

“i get it. luckily i’m not from hollywood, i am from new york.” you smile. 

“that’s nice to hear.” alessia giggles. 

the conversation continues late into the night, and by the time you both walk out into the cool london air, you’re standing a little closer than necessary, arms brushing as you make your way down the street. 

she walks you back to your hotel, and when you say goodnight, there’s a moment—a heartbeat of silence—where you both just look at each other, and you feel it. 

something more than just a bond that was formed in one night.

“goodnight, y/n,” she says softly, lingering for just a second before turning to leave.

“goodnight, alessia,” you reply, watching her walk away, already replaying the night in your head.

the next few days fly by in a blur of filming and hanging out with alessia whenever you can. 

you text constantly, even when you're both too busy. a couple of weeks later you’re in new york city with castmates on your show– and alessia is with arsenal finishing the season. 

she sends quick messages between training, silly selfies with her teammates, and voice notes that make you smile every time you listen to them. 

it’s not long before you’re both sharing pieces of yourselves you don’t usually let others see. 

when alessia heads off to the women's world cup with england, you don’t expect to miss her as much as you do. 

you haven’t seen her since that night in london. her messages get shorter, more sporadic as the competition heats up, and while you understand—she’s busy, focused—you can’t help but wish you were there to cheer her on in person.

and then, one day, you get a text from her: 

wish you could be here. can't wait to see you soon!

your heart skips a beat, and without thinking, you open your laptop, check your schedule, and find a two-week window. 

before you can second-guess yourself, you’re booking a flight to australia.

when you finally arrive in australia, the world cup is in full swing. 

the streets are filled with fans, the excitement is in the air, and you find yourself caught up in the energy. 

on the day of the final, you’re practically buzzing with nerves and anticipation. you dragged one of your castmates to come with you across the globe, just to see alessia live. 

you find your seat, your heart pounding as you look out over the pitch.

when alessia takes the field, you can’t stop grinning. you cheer loudly, the sound almost getting lost in the roar of the crowd, but you know she hears you—somehow, you just know. 

the match is intense, every pass and tackle pulling you deeper in. but as the final whistle blows, it’s spain who takes the victory, and the stadium is filled with a mix of cheers and groans. 

your heart sinks as you watch alessia’s face fall, the disappointment clear in her expression.

as england’s players walk off the pitch, heads hung low, you feel helpless, wanting nothing more than to comfort her. 

you’re not sure if she’s even seen you in the stands, and you hesitate, unsure of what to do. 

then, you see leah, one of her teammates that became one of your favorites, give alessia a nudge and nod in your direction.

alessia looks up, scanning the crowd until her eyes land on you. for a moment, she’s still, and then she’s moving—walking quickly toward you, her face a mixture of surprise, relief, and something that looks like hope. 

before you know it, she’s right in front of you, and you’re pulling her into your arms, holding her tight as she buries her face in your shoulder.

“i’m so proud of you,” you whisper, your voice barely audible over the noise of the crowd. 

“you were amazing.”

she lets out a shaky breath, holding you close. “i didn’t expect to see you here.”

“well, i couldn’t let you play in a world cup final without me,” you say, smiling softly as you pull back just enough to look into her eyes. 

“win or lose, i’m here for you.”

alessia’s eyes soften, and for a moment, the weight of the loss seems to lift. she cups your cheek with her hand, her thumb gently brushing against your skin, and you lean into the touch, your heart swelling with something warm and undeniable.

“thank you,” she whispers, her voice filled with emotion. and as the noise of the stadium fades into the background, all that matters is this—being here with her.

“maybe i can stay in london for a while, to make you feel better if thats okay?” you hug her again, holding her knowing that the world cup loss is still in her mind. 

“that is more than okay, y/n.”

masterlist

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Bitter Sweet Symphony 1

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: Thor

Summary: you meet a god in real life but he's not the saviour you think.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

You catch Joanie by her knapsack before she can disappear into the crowd. Your heart lurches as you just picture her tiny stature getting lost in the New York crush. You pull her back to you. 

“Joan, take me hand,” you demand shakily. 

“Sorry, I thought I saw...” she begins then shakes her head. The cat ears on her hat wiggle. She grabs your hand with her small one and you squeeze. “Nothing. I’m just excited.” 

“You know mom would kill me if I lost you,” you draw her out of the way of another pedestrian. The man in his suit doesn’t spare you a single thought as he charges by. 

“Ha, I’m not going to get lost,” she insists. 

You grumble but don’t voice your anxiety. She’s young and it’s all so big and loud to her. She’s still to young to be scared. You admire your half-sister for that but it also fills you with dread. 

“I did!” She squeals and jumps in her pink high tops. “I saw him, I saw him.” 

She points and her hand bounces off the hip of a woman strutting by. You apologise and once more redirect your sister. You squint and search in the direction she pointed. Yellow taxis honk as they roll by and jay walkers dodge between them. 

“Thor!” Your sister hollers and hops up again, waving her hand. 

That’s when you see him. You don’t know how you missed him. There’s so much going on that all the buildings and bodies blend together. For as long as you’ve been in the city, you’re still not used to the chaos of it all. 

“Thor?” You echo her. 

“Duh! God of Thunder! He hangs out with Iron Man.” 

“Right,” you shepherd her back before she can get underfoot. “You know what mom says about talking to strangers.” 

“He’s not a stranger, he’s a hero.” She argues. 

“Maybe but I’m sure he’s just trying to live his life. He doesn’t look like he’s hero-ing right now, kiddo,” you chide. 

“But...” her face falls. “But we don’t have heroes at home! What if I never see another one again? I just wanna say hi.” 

“I know, Joan, but I...” you pause and glance back. There are others clustering around the tall man. He smiles and welcomes them as he greets them all graciously. You just hate to be in others way. You should have considered that before you moved to one of the most overcrowded places on earth. “Alright, but we’re going to go down and cross at the walk, right?” 

She harrumphs and agrees begrudgingly, “right.” 

You take her down the sidewalk, clamped onto her as you steer her around the New Yorkers trapped in the tunnel vision of their own existence. You get to the corner and wait and cross with a cluster. You glance down the pavement as Joanie squirms. 

“Oh no, I think he’s gone,” she whines. 

You look desperately ahead and grimace. You hope you didn’t ruin it for her. You drag her along, hoping that long blonde hair will pop up again. It doesn’t. You get to the exact place you spotted him. He’s not there. 

“I’m so sorry, Joanie. I just wanted to be safe.” You turn to her, your chest dropping. “I’m so sorry.” 

“It’s fine...” she drones and hangs her head. 

You stumble as a man knocks into your hip. You try to make yourself smaller but it’s hard to dodge anyone on the sidewalk even without a little extra cushion. You peer around and your eyes catch on the hanging sign of a bakery. 

“How about a treat instead? You love cupcakes, right?” You coax her. 

“Mm, I guess,” she shrugs. 

Her disappointment stings. You feel horrid. You know she’s going to hold onto this. 

“Come on, let’s get out of this,” you pull her to the bakery door.  

As you enter, you sigh. You’re happy to be free of the city crawl. You look up at the menu above the counter. You’ve never been in here before. It’s a nice place and the desserts look immaculate. They’re also expensive. 

“Look they have a unicorn--” You begin and Joanie rips her hand away as she wiggles. 

“He’s here!” She cries out. “It’s Thor.” 

Her voice carries across the space and you cringe and you look over to find the man, or god, in question. His blue eyes round as he bites into a cupcake piled with icing. The sugary topping marks his nose as he pulls it away and gulps. He gives a goofy smile. 

“Joanie,” you whisper, “he’s just trying to enjoy his food.” 

“Little one!” He waves before you can deter her. “You know me.” 

Joanie giggles and squeals and skips over before you can stop her. You trail after her reluctantly as she hops up to his table, “your Thor, king of Asgard, God of Thunder!” She jitters. “I know you!” 

He booms with laughter and wipes the icing from his beard and nose. His cupcake is forgotten on a small saucer. “An honour to meet you...” 

“Joanie!” She nearly hollers. “My name is Joanie.” 

“Ah, a beautiful name,” he praises and his eyes wander over you as you hover behind her. “And this lady, your mother?” 

“Sister!” Joanie replies before you can and gives your name. 

You try to smile as he grins at you and his eyes seem to sparkle. You wonder if that’s a god thing. Your cheeks are hot as his gaze bores into you. 

“Are you here for the cupcakes? They are delicious. I recommend the confetti.” He puts his attention back to Joanie. “Would you like to join me?” 

“Oh, sir, thanks, that’s so kind but we’ll just be getting ours to go--” 

“But--” Joanie begins to whine and you lay your hand on her shoulder. 

“If you don’t mind. She’s a big fan.” 

“Not at all,” he assures you. “Allow me to treat you. What are we having?” 

He stands and you shrink as he towers over you. There aren’t many who can make you feel small. You can’t help but take a step back and herd Joanie with you. 

“Um...” you look over, “it’s really—I don’t mind. I can’t get ours. We’ve already bothered--” 

“I must insist. As a king, I prize courtesy above all. Please sit and allow me to bring you some sweets.” 

“I want the unicorn!” Joanie demands before you can stop her. You give Thor and apologetic look. He only seems amused by her awe. 

“That’s very generous of you, what do we say, Joanie?” You say. 

“Please and thank you,” she chirps. 

“Yes, thank you, Thor. I’m fine with something simple. Vanilla is good for me.” You move Joanie away from him, “come on, let’s sit down. We’ve done a lot of walking.” 

[catlvrmax]

RACE DAY & NIGHTCLUBS.

MV1 X FEM!READER

summary it's race day! you and amara decide to spend your sunday night out in the city. you make new friends in the process.

cw ONE use of [Y/N] - it was inevitable. idk the deets of how f1 works exactly, but i tried. this is a work of fiction: i don't know these people irl, i don't know how they act. NON-DESCRIPTIVE READER.

face claims girls on pinterest, but you can obviously disregard them, and imagine whoever you want. (the pictures are for aesthetic purposes.)

a/n i feel like the alonso scene is kinda useless but idk i put it in ite.

masterlist | taglist

—

"I'm so excited!" Amara squealed as you grabbed her wrist to keep her close.

Today is race day. You woke up early, buzzing with anticipation. Amara tried to (poorly) contain her excitement and constant giggles until you had at least one cup of coffee in your system but failed ten minutes into breakfast. You don't blame her—she loves the sport.

She also loves the drivers. Loves the gossip and the drama on and off track. A new thing she has picked up, one you really want to put a stop to, is teasing you about a certain Dutchman. It was already bad enough that your conversation kept replaying in your head, and her playful teasing increased the thoughts of the two-time world champion.

You tolerated it on the walk to the circuit, rolling your eyes at her dreamy sighs and romantic scenarios, which she mostly made up to annoy you but changed the subject as you approached your destination. You refused to look or sound like a crazy fangirl in case... well, in case of actually running into him.

Arriving at the circuit and checking in the paddock had been a nightmare. You and Amara were not huge fans of crowded places you more than her, and the heat of the sun beating down on you made it ten times worse. Alas, you finally found yourselves away from the masses and around the corner of the Aston Martin hospitality building.

Amara was not paying attention to where she was going, and you were listening intently to the plans for the day. At the last minute, you saw a green shirt from the corner of your eye. You pulled on her wrist, and she stumbled towards you, but not before softly colliding with the side of the tall man in the green shirt.

"Oh, shit. ¡Lo siento, señor!" The apology comes in Spanish. (I am sorry, sir!)

"Esta bien, señorita? I was not looking in my path." You try to catch your jaw from falling to the ground when you eye the Green Shirt Guy. (Are you okay, miss?)

That's Fernando fucking Alonso. Fernando Alonso, the man you may or may not have a tiny crush on, is helping Amara stand up after she bent over to grab her discarded water bottle.

"Ah, si. Lo siento, señor Alonso. Estaba mostrando a mi amiga alrededor—"

"It's you from yesterday, no?! The girl with the great, uh, Spanish skills!" He talks to her as if they've known each other for years.

You stand there stunned, trying to compose yourself as your F1 crush stands before you, casually conversing with your best friend. Amara must be ready to explode right about now. You would laugh if you weren't fighting the urge to scream and run around from the joy.

You hear your name fall from Amara's lips, and your gaze focuses back on them. "That's my best friend. I gave her the hat!"

Fernando nods, his gaze on you as a polite smile causes his dimples to appear. You show him the signed Aston Martin cap by tilting your head.

"Amara said you are a big fan. I appreciate it. Do you want to take a photograph?"

"Uh-Yeah! Yeah, I'd love to!" You take your phone out. Oh-em-gee. Oh-em-gee. Is this really happening? "It's nice to meet you, sir!" You can feel the heat radiating off your cheeks.

Fernando, being taller than you, asks for your phone. He raises it above your head and takes a couple of selfies. You muster the brightest smile, copying his funny faces and poses. When he hands it back, thank yous stumble from your lips faster than any car on the grid.

"Mucha suerte para ti hoy!" (Best of luck to you today!)

Fernando laughs but bows his head in appreciation. "Muchas gracias, querida." He turns to Amara, who's watching you both with a smile. "Enjoy the race, girls!"

And with that, he's walking away. You and Amara stand still for a few seconds, watching him disappear around the corner. You lock eyes, jaws on the floor. Squeals escape the both of you as you grab each other for support.

"Oh, my fucking God! We just—I—You—"

"I talked to Fernando fucking Alonso, and you took a photo with him. Shit!" Her tone betrays her disbelief.

"Oh, pinch me, 'mara, because this can't possibly be fucking real!" You cup your red cheek with one palm. "He remembered you. That's crazy!"

Amara giggles. "We talked in Spanish yesterday, and he told me he was impressed by my fluency!"

You smack her arm, suppressing a smile. "What? Why didn't you tell me all of that!? From past experiences, your Spanish has been shit."

She gasps dramatically, feigning offence. "How dare you, missy?! My Spanish is almost perfect. I just happened to get nervous around native speakers!"

You laugh and raise your hands in surrender, muttering my bad. Amara links her elbow with yours. "Are you ready to watch twenty cars go in weird-shaped circles?"

"Yup," you answer, popping the p before pulling her towards the building you will be watching from. "He is hotter in person." You cannot help but add.

Amara rolls her eyes but hums in agreement.

—

"Max Verstappen wins the Spanish Grand Prix! Another flawless performance by the current World Champion!"

You can't help but smile as the camera cuts to his team celebrating. Amara claps in delight, gathering her scattered things from the table to put inside her bag. The VIP room you watched the race from is slowly emptying as everyone walks down to where the celebration will take place. Amara wants to go and get as close as she can to the front, so she can take pictures of the podium. Lewis Hamilton came second, followed by George Russell, and your best friend was beaming and eager to see the podium from up close.

"You don't have to come with me. It's pretty tight there, with the crew, and fans, and stuff." You nod, thankful to her for not forcing you to tag along. "You can wait by the Red Bull hospitality. I think it's closer to the exit." She pauses as you stand from your seat. "And who knows. Maybe a Dutchman will pass by, and you deliver on your plan."

You huff at her wiggling eyebrows. "Seems kind of impossible since Max is celebrating on the podium, 'mara. You have a better chance at meeting him." You snort at her deflated expression.

"Oh, yeah, you're right." She shrugs. "Well, who knows? You might bump into each other again."

"I highly doubt that. Now, give me everything you don't need. I'll put it in my bag. I don't want you losing anything in that crowd."

Amara hands you her handbag and kisses you on the cheek before walking away. You're the only guest in the room now, accompanied by the bartender on the other side of the room. You contemplate staying here or leaving for the Red Bull hospitality. The track fills with fans, as is the ground below the podium. Lewis and George are already there, which means that—

"Here's Max Verstappen, the winner of this year's Spanish Grand Prix." Crofty, the commentator, announces the champion's arrival at the podium's top step.

He looks handsome, with a smile decorating his face and high cheekbones glistening with sweat. He waves at the crowd and takes his Pirelli hat off. His hair is messy, but it just makes him look hotter. Wow. You need to stop, or you'll salivate all over the bloody floor. You turn away from the TV as the Dutch national anthem starts playing.

One thought keeps repeating as you walk out of the building and to the sunny paddock. Max Verstappen is undoubtedly handsome.

—

You're aimlessly pacing in front of the Red Bull building, skipping through the pictures you'd taken. Most of them were of Amara posing in front of different buildings, eating or walking. You don't notice a chest heading your way until it's too late, and you collide. Ouch, you mumble as you rub your forehead.

"We should stop meeting like this." You recognise the voice immediately. How could you not? The man has been plaguing your thoughts.

Your heart is racing. You don't meet Max's eyes at first, hoping that a simple apology will make him walk away. "Oh, sorry. Wasn't paying attention."

"Are you lost again? Do you need help?" Max is quick to offer, but you shake your head negatively.

A hand comes forward, a featherlight touch on your elbow. You finally meet his gaze, rubbing on the spot that stings. What the fuck is he made of? Rock? His eyes hold concern as they rake over your face.

"What are you made of? Rock or something? That stung!" You offer a shy smile and a joke, for his worried expression makes your palms sweat.

He returns the smile. "Hey! You were the one not paying attention."

You shrug. "I was looking through the photos I've taken." You raise the old camera for him to see.

"Oh, yeah? Any cool ones?" He asks, stepping closer to you to see.

You notice a man behind the driver, wearing a Red Bull polo and an impatient expression. Anxiety sparks at your chest. He's got somewhere to be. Leave him alone. "Don't you have media duties to attend? You did just win a race." His smile turns guilty at your words.

"Yeah. I've got to change from this," he points at his racing suit," and attend interviews." He doesn't look too excited to do so.

"Well, then, I shouldn't be keeping you." You move a step back, nervously glancing at the other man.

Max does as well, the flush on his cheeks bolder than before. He opens his mouth, and you watch him have an internal war with himself before he decides to voice whatever thought he has. He motions to the man to go ahead without him. I'll be there in a minute, he mutters.

"I'd love to see those photographs."

Your eyes widen in surprise, and you know you look like a fish as your mouth opens and closes. Your face heats up. "Uh—They're really nothing special. This is an old camera."

Max shrugs. "Why don't you give me your number? I can be the judge of that." Oh, shit. You nod.

He does an immaculate job of looking confident as if this isn't affecting him. A pretty girl agreed to give him his number. It's dangerous for a person with the number of young fans he has to give his phone number to a stranger, but he feels he can trust you. You haven't given him a reason to think you might be a crazy fangirl.

"D'you have a pen? I don't have my phone with me." You nod, rummaging through your handbag to find the emergency glittery pink pen.

Once you pull it out, Max can't help but comment on it. "Nice colour." You send him a playful glare.

He stretches his palm, and you softly pull his fingers closer. You scribble down your number, writing your first and last name underneath it. Max feels remorseful for not even having asked you your name. He knows that you no doubt know who he is now. He repeats it, and your breath hitches. He says it so perfectly, you might melt in a puddle. Caaaaaalm down. You sound insane. He's just stating your name.

"Pretty name," he thinks out loud. You don't believe you were meant to hear that, yet your face grows a shade darker.

Before you can say anything, the man shouts his name from the building's door. "Come on, mate! You're going to be late!" You can see the disappointment Max feels from his deflated smile.

"I have to go. Media duties." You chuckle when he rolls his eyes and nod. "I'll, uh, text you. For the pictures." He takes a step back, eyes locked with yours.

"For the pictures, yeah."

His face is flushed. You blame the race he just won. It's a poor excuse to give someone your number, no matter how famous they might be, yet you did. Amara will have a field day with this information. You half expect her to revive her old Tumblr account for the sake of acting on her scenarios.

"Bye." You wave, and he waves back, exchanging bashful smiles.

You watch his figure approach the man by the door when it hits you. "Oh, Max!" He turns quickly, eyes searching for yours. "Congratulations on your win!"

His eyes crinkle from the smile that he gives you. "Thank you!" He adds your name, and you don't deny it this time; Max Verstappen is extremely handsome, especially when he smiles.

—

MESSAGES: two. From > unknown number.

unknown number

hey, it's Max!

Verstappen. The guy in

the RB shirt.

you

hm... i don't know anyone

with this name. sorry!

max verstappen

Two-time world champion?

you

nope.

never met any world champions

in my life, sorry.

max verstappen

I helped you yesterday

and saw you today outside of

the RB hospitality.

This is [Y/N], right?

you

🤣 yes!

i'm just messing with you max!

max verstappen

*phew* had me thinking you

gave me the wrong number

you

*dramatic gasp*

i am NOT that cruel, mr verstappen!

btw, i havent transferred the photos yet!

camera's charging.

max verstappen

That's totally okay!

Soooo, what are you doing tonight?

you

contemplating whether i should share my

whereabouts with a random man....

max verstappen

HEY! you've met me!

two times already!!!

you

and how do i know this is the REAL

Max Verstappen????????

max verstappen

....you gave me your phone number.

you

oh, yeah. that makes sense.

i'm very sleep deprived haha

max verstappen

😂😂

you

Soooo, what are you doing tonight?

  ↪ to answer your previous question,

me and my bff are going clubbing

in Barcelona!

max verstappen

Oh, that sounds fun!

you

i'm secretly terrified of getting lost

in the city, but hey! i'm only here for another

night. might as well have fun

plus, i've heard Spaniards party hard!!!!!

max verstappen

plus, i've heard Spaniards party hard!!!!!

   ↪ THAT'S TRUE. Carlos is an

expert in all things nightclub when we're

here for the GP

you

you have any places to recommend?

amara is still looking on trip advisor

max verstappen

😨 TRIP ADVISOR?

you

WELL WE HAD TO START SOMEWHERE

max verstappen

the Vault is a really great place. Great

drinks and the DJ plays nice songs.

You should try that one!

you

i'm guessing it's expensive

as fuck

max verstappen

not as expensive as it is packed

BUT there's always the Disco Diva

and other clubs down that street

you

max verstappen, you know your

clubs, i see.

(the disco diva? really?)

max verstappen

you caught me ahahahahah

(the disco diva? really?)

   ↪ it plays really cool stuff

you

it plays really cool stuff

   ↪ i trust ur judgement.

so what are YOU, race winner, doing

tonight?

max verstappen

how do I know I'm not giving away

my location to a super crazy

fangirl?

you

you dont! YOU wanted MY number.

soooo.... 🤷🏻‍♀️

max verstappen

LOL. you're funny.

so what are YOU, race winner, doing

tonight?

  ↪ I was thinking of gaming, but the

boys want to party.

you

WELL, YAH! you totally deserve to let loose!

max verstappen

Hm, I might think about it.

Ha! Maybe we'll find each other in the club!

you

hahahahah it would be pretty embarrassing

if i ran into you again.

for the third time.

have fun with whatever you choose

to do, Maximus Verstappen.

max verstappen

that is definitely NOT my first name.

but i thank you, schat 😁

seen, now.

—

"Who are you talking to?" Amara asks, her eyes glued on TripAdvisor.

"H-Huh?" You barely register her words, fingers tapping on your screen incredibly fast.

"You've been giggling for, like, ten minutes now. I'm assuming it's not your mom. She's probably having lunch."

"Oh, you know. Just this guy I bumped into today. You might know him. His name's Max. Ma—"

"Fucking Verstappen?!" Amara all but yells, sitting up swiftly.

Your eyes meet her shocked expression, and you can't help the chuckle that escapes at her priceless reaction. You shrug in response, feigning nonchalance. Truth is, your best friend has hyped this guy up a lot, and your poor heart beats somewhat faster now that you're talking to him.

"You told me to get his number, didn't you?"

"W-Well—Yeah. But I didn't actually think you'd do it!"

You gasp as if offended. "You dare think so little of me? Think that I wouldn't honour my promise to feed your delusions?"

Amara laughs, lightly smacking your arm. "Okay, weirdo. Tell me what the fuck happened."

After pushing yourself to a sitting position, you tell her every detail of your second meeting with the world champion, including the texts. Amara's reactions are comical. At the end of your story-telling process, she's sitting there, with her jaw mere inches from touching the ground.

"So, do you think we'll meet him in that nightclub?"

You shrug. "I don't know. He said he'd think about it." You show her your phone, scrolling to the text he had sent you mere minutes ago. "Doesn't sound that eager to me."

"Well, it wouldn't hurt to go by the Vault, or whatever its name was." Amara wiggles her eyebrows.

"Are you trying to get me laid with a celebrity?"

She grimaces. "Pfft. He's hot. You're pretty. If you take out the millions on Instagram—" "—and his bank account." Amara shoots you a pointed look. "He looks like a pretty normal guy." She exhales before continuing. "You should have fun. We didn't come here just for me. And he seems like a lot of fun."

Amara wasn't wrong. Yes, you had come here for the Grand Prix, which was her thing, but there was plenty of time for you to have fun. And if fun meant drinking and meeting with an extremely handsome guy, who were you to refuse? You'd probably never see him again, either.

—

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—

"Finally!" You shout excitedly.

After waiting for a solid thirty minutes in a very long line outside of Club Vault and paying an entry fee that you're sure is way too expensive, you have finally made it inside. The place is flooded with people drinking, dancing, and talking. The lights are dim, and the music loud; a promising, fun night.

You barely dodge swaying on the dancefloor as Amara drags you to the bar. She orders for you while you look around. The DJ and his setup is on a balcony, above which there is a VIP sign. You squint your eyes as another face comes into view. Is that...Lando Norris?

You blindly reach for Amara, turning her around by the wrist. "Hey, isn't that Norris?"

Despite the ear-deafening music, you're able to hear your best friend's gasp. "Oh, my fucking God! Yes, that's him!" She looks at you, a knowing smile on her lips. "Does that mean that he's here—"

"I don't know!" The bartender nods at you, showing you your drinks. "Let's drink!"

And that's exactly what you do. Your drinks are cold enough to help with the heat of dancing, and you can't lie, Lando—with the help of the actual DJ—plays decent music. Max was right about the place being fun. Amara is doing her weird dance moves, and you're copying her, trying to best her.

You're two drinks in, back turned to the DJ booth, when your best friend's eyes widen, dance moves faltering, and you hear everybody cheer. She elbows you to turn around, and your breath hitches: it's Max. He's actually here with Lando and the DJ. And your heart is racing with excitement. He waves at the crowd below, and everyone cheers louder.

Your lip twitches as an idea forms in your mind. Taking your phone out of your boot (an extremely smart and safe place to hide it—if it fits—btw), you snap a picture of the champion, sending it to your chat.

—

MESSAGES: two. To > max verstappen.

you

one file attached.

just found your lookalike!

max verstappen

THATS ME! WhEere are yoU?!?!8@

you

how much have you had to drink? lol

max verstappen

not drunk .

just shvoing past poepel to get to you

where re uoy?????

you

by the bar

max verstappen

real helpful

you

im wearing black?

seen, now

—

You wait a couple of seconds for the grey bubble to appear. When you don't receive a response, you shrug, putting your phone back in its hiding spot. Your gaze focuses on Amara; she's biting her lip while holding two shots in each hand.

"I stole them!" is all she says.

Your jaw drops, and you giggle, accepting the tiny glasses. You yell cheers before chugging down both of them. Tequila. Nice.

You take a step back, eyes blinking away tears caused by the burn in your throat. You don't realise you've stepped into someone's toes until a shout almost bursts your eardrums.

"Jesus Christ!" You yell, covering the side of your head.

Turning around, you're faced with the one and only; Max Verstappen, holding on to the bar railing with a pained expression. Your eyes almost bulge out of your skull.

"Oh, shit! Are you okay?" You can barely hear yourself.

He nods, throwing a smile your way. "Yeah, I'm good! It's nice to see you!" You're barely able to read his lips.

A pinch on your lower back startles you, and you turn around with a gasp. Amara's standing there, expectant, wide eyes moving from you to Verstappen.

"Oh, Max! This is my best friend, Amara!"

She smiles politely, shaking his offered hand. "Nice to meet you!" You wonder if she's close to passing out from internal fangirling.

His eyes return to you. "Hey, you wanna join my table?"

Shaking your head with a confused grimace, you shout. "I can't hear anything you're saying!"

"What?!"

"I can't hear any—"

It's futile to communicate this way, he decides. Max's slightly cold hands are suddenly pulling on your wrists, gently guiding you closer to him. Goosebumps take over your entire body, forearm burning as he moves his fingers to your elbow, keeping you steady, and he leans toward your ear.

"Wanna join me and my friends?" He feels your breath hitch and pulls back to meet your hesitant gaze.

"We don't want to bother you," you say once you pull him down.

Max shakes his head. "Nonsense! I won the race, and I want to celebrate with my friends."

He hears your breathy chuckle. "We're friends, now?"

"Unless you're some super crazy fangirl I should be worried about." The smile in his voice gives away his amusement. He's quoting his texts.

You pause for a second. Knowing Amara, she would agree immediately. You should have fun, you recall her words from earlier. And he seems like a lot of fun. Yeah. She's right.

"Let me ask 'mara." You point to your best friend, awkwardly standing by the bar.

He watches you talk in her ear, a smile forming on your best friend's lips before she eagerly nods. "You're coming?" He asks once you approach him as if he hadn't been staring at you already.

"Okay." As soon as you nod, Max's smile widens, eyes shining.

You nod, and he feels his cheeks hurt from smiling so hard. "C'mon," goosebumps raise on your exposed arms as Max grabs your hand. His hand is so soft. "I don't want you getting lost." The wink he throws your way only fuels the flush on your neck and cheeks.

It's definitely going to be a fun night.

The walk to the VIP section is extremely difficult, with Max getting recognised and patted on the back every few seconds. When you finally make it, you sigh in relief before Max pulls you both by the wrist to meet his friends. Be cool, you mouth to Amara who only nods, wide-eyed.

"Pierre and Kika, Charles and Alex, this is [Y/N] and Amara!" You're sure they can barely hear him over the loud music but wave at them anyway. Charles shares a look with Pierre, the latter unable to contain his smile.

Max leans down, his nose brushing your temple. "Wait just a moment. Lando's around here somewhere." Before you can say a word, he flashes you a smile and disappears into the crowd, leaving you gaping like a fish.

You have no time to recover when the pretty girls approach you. Alex introduces herself as Alexandra, but she doesn't mind going by Alex. Kika's name is Francisca, but she goes by Kika. It's nice to meet them, and you don't hesitate to tell them so.

"Shots?" Amara reappears with four shot glasses passing them to each of you. "Cheers!" You clink your glasses before downing them.

"Oh, are you doing shots without me?!" A new voice pops up from behind you. Amara's eyes widen momentarily, meeting yours in poorly contained excitement.

You turn, gaze landing on Lando Norris and then gluing on Max Verstappen. This lighting makes him look even hotter. Is it normal to be thinking that? Probably not.

He introduces you to the tipsy-looking Brit, who shakes your hands in return. Amara's pulled to the side by Kika, something about doing more shots, and Charles motions for Max to go over to him. Once you're alone with Lando, a smile breaks onto his face.

"He's said a lot about you!" Your brows furrow, confused.

"What? That I tend to get lost easily in big places?" You nervously laugh, but Lando just shakes his head.

"Somethin' like tha'!"

—

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—

You haven't had this much fun in a while. You and Amara usually go to two clubs as a duo, but you admit having more people to dance and do shots with is way more fun. You're usually the sober one, having a higher tolerance for alcohol than your best friend, and this time you're extra careful since you're in a foreign place.

At some point during your dance battle with Kika and Amara, you grow tired. As much as you liked exaggerating your moves, your boots were made for walking, not jumping. Max had been out of your vision for a while, and you decided to look for him. He wasn't hard to find, considering he was nursing a drink on a couch further away from the action.

"Hey!" You plop down, bumping your elbow with his.

Max grinned. "Hey, stranger. Are you having fun?"

You nod excitedly. "Your friends are really nice." He snorts at that. "No, really! Drive to Survive does justice to none of you!"

Max's eyes widen, mouth hanging in shock. "Your source of information is a Netflix show?"

"Hey! I had to start from somewhere. I knew next to nothing about racing."

Conversing with Max comes naturally. He's funny, and he listens to what you have to say. He asks about your job: a photographer for brands. He laughs when you tell him you prefer the make-up brands because they're easier to manage than people.

He explains racing to you in simple terms. You nod along, trying your best to take in the information. It's harder with all the music and dancing bodies, but you make it work. You've shuffled even closer to him as Max leans down to talk directly in your ear while his hands move animatedly in front of you.

At some point, the conversation shifts to cats. You're delighted to learn that he has not one, but two big babies. Jimmy and Sassy. Max is a very proud cat dad, you conclude, from the excitement that exudes from every pore of his body as he slides from picture to picture.

"Oh my goodness! They're so cute!" You try not to literally squeal as Max stumbles upon a picture of them napping on his chest.

"They sleep all day and ask for treats all night." You laugh as he rolls his eyes, probably recalling every time this has happened.

"Oh, I'd love to meet them one day. They look lovely!"

"Yeah, I could introduce you someday," he says, and you turn to look at him with a huge smile.

"I should bring my Cheddar when it happens."

"Cheddar?"

"My cat. He's a big fluffball." You reach for your phone, unlocking it to search for pictures of your orange cat.

"And you named him Cheddar? After the cheese?" He looks at you incredulously.

You giggle at his expression. "He's as orange as the cheese. It was my mom's idea to name him that."

You turn your phone his way, showing him a selfie of the fluffiest cat Max has ever seen on top of your shoulders. You're clearly giggling in it, a hand over your mouth. Cute, he thinks.

"He's adorable."

"And fat," you add.

Tapping a most recent picture, you show it to Max. Cheddar is on his back, his fat ass making him look like a pear. Your mom had sent you this just a day before.

"He's staying with my mom right now. And she's feeding him more than needed."

"We should arrange a playdate." You chuckle at Max's suggestion.

"Sure, if you fly out to England."

Before Max can respond, a very loud and drunk Brit makes his way to you. Lando grins when he spots you two sitting close, indiscreetly winking at Max. Your face feels warm.

"Do you guys wan' t' leave?" You barely make out his words.

Charles notices the three of you and pulls a dancing Alex with him, who pulls Amara with her. The three make their way to where you're seated.

"What are you guys talking about?"

Lando turns to him. "Are you hungry, mate?"

Charles shakes his head, leaning close to Alex to ask her the same. She also shakes her head with an apologetic smile.

"I am!" Amara nudges Lando, and his eyes light up.

He turns to Max and you. "Me and my new friend," he pulls Amara by the shoulders, and she drunkenly stumbles, "are hungry. Will you take us somewhere to eat?"

You look at Max, who mirrors your smiling expression. Lando says something about Max promising to be his chauffeur if he got too drunk.

"I could eat," you shrug. Max nods, agreeing.

He stands up, looking at the drunk pair. "Okay, let's go."

—

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