#oh god i didnt even mean for this to post today

[angelstrawbabie420]

grief will have you saying shit like goddamn and fuck maybe the abuse was worth it

[mellotronmkll]

i like literally wish i didnt feel compelled to rewatch and relisten to the same things over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again its like actually really annoying and frustrating because i just feel like im constantly stuck in a loop doing the same things over and over but thats just literally what its like being autistic like its just frustrating cos i dont want to have to be constantly fighting with myself over it because its like okay we dont need to get stuck in the daily loop of walking in circles for hours listening to the same songs we've heard 200 times or sitting and watching things we've seen 30 times and there are better ways we could be spending our time but the compulsion is SO strong and its just Omfg like its just annoying and horrible because I have to force myself to try to break out of patterns I wish the constant compulsion I have to do the same things over and over and over and over and OVER AND OVER wasnt there at all because it would make things way easier for me and it just makes me feel so dumb.

[cinnabeat]

sometimes my lungs/heart do something funky and im like hm that doesnt seem normal. but then i reason to myself well you just got up and walked around obviously ur heart will beat a little harder since youre moving but then im like no thats bullshit i walked 20 feet to the bathroom that should NOT make my heart beat so hard i feel like i just ran for my life. but then i reason to myself again well youre kind of out of shape so its understandable? and then im like NO bc this has happened even when i was exercising regularly thanks to soccer this isnt normal? but then-

[roachemoji]

[81folklore]

heaven - PIASTRI - final part

pairings: oscar piastri x private!reader (fc: gracie abrams + pinterest)

summary: on the 2 year anniversary of oscars first win in f1, everyone’s favorite couple has a surprise

type: social media au (smau)

note: well this is it!! the final part to heaven!! this ending has always been the plan and im so pleased i can finally post it, this win has been a longgg time coming and i am super stoked for oscar!!! obviously not the best race (esp for mclaren fans) but we got through it and oscar won!!!! super duper proud of my mclaren boys and i cant wait to see many more 1-2 with them!!

i honestly cant believe this is the last part to this series, this was one of the first fics i ever posted and its crazy how far its come!! to this day i get notifs that people have found the first part to this series and it blows my mind how big this has gotten. i know ive been inactive for a long time but i hope by finally finishing this fic i will find love for creating fics again!!!! love u all🩵

heaven masterlist masterlist

set 2026

youruser

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 11,629 others

two years ago my best friend asked me to marry him, i said yes immediately. how could i say no to spending the rest of my life with someone i love so deeply?

today marks 6 months of him being my husband and i feel so incredibly blessed to be able to call him that, to be able to say that someone i love, loves me back just as much

but today is also the anniversary of my boys first win, which seems crazy now that he has many more under his belt but its true, its been two years since that crazy day in hungary and one that changed us forever

i have grown so much in the time we have been together and im so pleased i was able to do it with you, osc. i love you forever and always!

tagged oscarpiastri

view comments

oscarpiastri my favorite forever🤍

oscarpiastri marrying you was the best decision i have ever made

youruser my boy🌟🌟

comments on this post have been limited

oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, logansargeant and 1,382,003 others

i cant believe i get to call this gorgeous girl my wife, and i’ll be able to do so for the rest of our lives

you had never shone as brightly as on our wedding day, however youve continued to shine ever so bright since and i hope it never goes away, seeing you happy and content makes me feel like the luckiest man alive

thank you for saying yes all those years ago and thank you for trusting me with your heart, ill love you forever and always

your osc x

view comments

youruser i love you so much osc

youruser you mean the world to me

landonorris congrats mate x

logansargeant i miss you guys :(

youruser we miss you too logie!!! we’ll be home soon and we will take you to dinner!!

logansargeant oscarpiastri promise?

oscarpiastri we promise

georgerussell63 happy for you both!

frederikvestiofficial come back soon i think logans withering away

oscarpiastri he’ll be fine for a few more days🙄

logansargeant nu huh!! i cant last much longer☹️

user66 oh my god she looks gorgeous 🥹🥹

oscarpiastri she is

user72 YOUR OSC😭😭😭😭

user6 im never getting over them☹️

user91 THEYRE MARRIED☹️☹️😭😭

user10 remember when yn said they werent getting married yet because they still had so much growing to do,, look at them now☹️

user47 i feel like everyones being too calm, WE DIDNT EVEN KNOW THEY WERE ENGAGED?!?!!?!

user64 LIKE WHY ARE WE NOT MORE SHOCKED

user22 bcs they are written in the stars and we all knew this was going to happen!!! liked by youruser

user30 yn with all the little babes oh i cant do this🥹🥹 liked by oscarpiastri

oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, lewishamilton and 1,392,027 others

17.01.2026

view comments

lewishamilton so happy for you mate, it was a gorgeous ceremony💜

logansargeant my favorite people in the whole world

oscarpiastri we love you

logansargeant 🥹🥹 (i love you guys too)

youruser my boy forever and ever and ever

oscarpiastri 🤍🤍

landonorris you guysss😕😕

youruser love you lan!!!!

youruser

liked by oscarpiastri, yourmum 11,483 others

a story told in many parts💐

comments on this post have been limited

pinned youruser to osc, my best friend, my love, my husband i will love you until the end of time. i will hold your hand through everything and more, until death do us part x

youruser added to their story

story song added heaven by niall horan text reads: my 🏠

seen by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 12,472 others

replies

user72 OH MY FUCKING GODDDDD

user19 I CANNOT DEAL WITH YOU TWO 😔😔😔😔

user63 ur literally perfect for eachother wtfwtfwtf

user90 I FEEL SICK THIS IS SO CUTE

user6 oscar is so sweet🥹🥹

youruser the sweetest!!!!

[lxclerc]

𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 — 𝐜𝐥𝟏𝟔

summary... wherein old photos of you and charles resurface and goes viral, forcing you and the man whose heart you broke to cross paths once again request… no faceclaim... christina nadin pairing… charles leclerc x reader warning… none so far

note... this is going to be part of a series that includes both one shots and smau but can be read as a stand alone

series masterlist main masterlist

current part (part one) → part two

charleslec

liked by username and others

charleslec fans found an old instagram account allegedly belonging to charles from (what we believe to be) ages 12 - 20. the account is filled of personal pictures consisting of his supposed ex girlfriend, y/n y/l/n with sweet captions. y/n is a well known motorsport podcaster from monaco.

view all comments…

username EXCUSE ME?

username this was not in my 2023 bingo card 😭

username you mean to tell me my girl yn dated shARL

username the way that this is probably why she’s had practically the entire grid as guests in her podcast apart from charles

username this is such an invasion of their privacy though like clearly they both didnt want this to be dug up

⤷ username i mean if they didn’t want anyone to see, they should have deleted the account or at the very least put it on private

username okay but these pictures are so 🥹

username i always thought it was weird the way charles and yn never interacted despite both being from monaco and involved the racing world

charles_lec7

liked by lorenzotl and others

charles_lec7 Joyeux anniversaire, mon amour. il y a 16 ans, tu es venu au monde et c'est la meilleure chose qui me soit arrivée. je suis toujours là pour t'écouter parler de n'importe quoi pendant des heures en attendant le coucher du soleil, malgré la plainte d'enzo qui ne veut pas nous conduire 🤣🤣

(happy birthday, my love. 16 years ago, you came into this world and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. i’m always here to listen to you talk about whatever for hours while waiting for sunset despite enzo’s complaint against driving us.)

view all messages… July 7, 2013

yourusername Merci beaucoup, mon ange. Je suis tellement reconnaissante d'avoir passé un autre anniversaire avec toi. Je t'aime plus que les mots ❤️❤️ (thank you so much, my angel. i am so grateful to have spent another birthday with you. i love you more than words.)

⤷ charles_lec7 J'ai hâte de vous souhaiter un joyeux anniversaire 70 fois de plus. (looking forward to greeting you happy birthday 70 more times.)

⤷ username he was going to greet her 70 more happy birthdays because he thought they’d spend the rest of their life together 😭😭

⤷ username i only learned about them today but i am a child of divorce and they are my parents

jules_bianchi Joyeux anniversaire, yn!! Je suis toujours là pour veiller sur toi et Charles quand vous avez besoin de moi. (happy birthday, yn!! i’m always here looking out for you and charles whenever you need me.)

⤷ yourusername merci, jules ❤️ nous t'encourageons toujours (thank you, jules. we’re always rooting for you.)

⤷ username oh my god 🥲🥲🥲

username i ran as fast as i could as soon as i saw the posts and oh my god it’s true 😭

username they’ve 😭😭 been 😭 together 😭😭 since 😭😭 they 😭😭 were 16 😭😭

⤷ username if you scroll even further down, he first greeted her on her 13th birthday where he called her the prettiest girl 🥲

⤷ username i’m about to stab myself

username y’all ever thought that the reason why he probably wanted number 7 is because her birthday is july 7 which is 7/7

⤷ username STOP IT RN

⤷ username his username has 7 in it bc it’s her birthday 🥲

⤷ username someone fucking sedate me

charles_lec7

liked by arthur_leclerc and others

charles_lec7 entrer en 2016 avec la même fille qu'en 2010. mon amour, je te tiendrai la main pour toujours ❤️❤️ (entering 2017 with the same girl from 2010. my love, i’ll hold your hand forever.)

view all comments… January 1, 2016

arthur_leclerc vous êtes tous les deux si ennuyeux 🙄🙄 (you’re both so annoying)

⤷ yourusername arrêtez d'être jaloux (stop being jealous)

lorenzotl Bonne année à vous deux! (happy new year to the both of you!)

⤷ yourusername je t'aime, enzo

yourusername Tu ne m'as pas demandé de sortir avec toi avant 2012 🤔🤔 (you didn’t ask me on a date till 2012 though)

⤷ charles_lec7 Je t'aime depuis bien plus longtemps que tu ne le penses (i love you far longer than you’ve known)

⤷ joris_trouche Malheureusement, je peux le confirmer en tant que personne qui a dû tout écouter. (unfortunately i can confirm this as someone who had to listen to everything)

⤷ yourusername ❤️❤️

yourusername and to many more years to come. Je t'aimerai pour le reste de ma vie (i’ll love you for the rest of my life)

⤷ charles_lec7 as long as i’m with you

username no because they legitimately seem so in love????? like from their words and not just the pictures

⤷ username there’s no way you’re going to tell me that a man who said “i’ve loved you far longer than you’ve known” and a girl who said “i’ll love you for the rest of my life” are no longer in love

username scrolling through this account is like watching their relationship unfold and mature before my eyes

username there’s no way you can tell me that two people so in love, looking forward to the future they plan to have together can just fall out of love and be complete strangers a few years later

⤷ username right!!!! because what do you mean love like this can exist and somehow just fade? what’s the point of love then??????

username the rest of us really be having an existential crisis because of a relationship that ended 6 years ago 😭

charles_lec7

liked by yourusername and others

charles_lec7 10 years from now, i hope it’s still you by my side

view all comments… November 5, 2017

yourusername félicitations, f2 world champion 🎉🥳 (congratulations)

⤷ charles_lec7 Merci, mon amour, je t'aime tellement. (thank you, my love. i love you so much.)

⤷ yourusername 💕

⤷ username i think this is the end guys 😔

⤷ username her energy is so different here. she literally sounds more like a friend greeting a friend rather than a girlfriend of 6 years by this point

username how did we go from “looking forward to greet you 70 more times) bc they were so sure they’d grow old together to “10 years from now, i hope it’s still you by my side” where he sounds so uncertain if they’re in each other’s futures???????

⤷ username no fuck that because how the fuck did we go from “i love you more than words” and “i’ll love you for the rest of my life” to a “💕” without even an i love you too???????????

username this is his last post of her 🥲🥲🥲

⤷ username she doesn’t even follow this account anymore

⤷ username he abandoned this account after they broke up 😭😭

username no bc he’s f2 champion here and they were still together but he entered formula 1 single??? what the hell happened

yourusername

liked by lissiemackintosh and others

yourusername in another life

view all comments…

lissiemackintosh gorgeous gorgeous girl

⤷ yourusername no you

madisonbeer 🔥🔥🔥

yourbestfriend un voyage dans le passé ? (a trip down memory lane?)

⤷ yourusername 😵😬

username no bc your love story had me tearing up and now i refresh my feed and see this?

username she wanted to remind charles what he lost 😭

username in another life!!! i would have been your girlllllll

username literally the one that got away

username i simply can’t accept that this is the end of their story like this can’t be it, right?

taglist: @ncentic @coffeehurricanes @academia-girl00 @nhlfs @livinglifethroughfanfic @sage-butterflyy @chimchimjiminie16 @thatgirlmj @hiraethrhapsody 

[skythealmighty]

why am i just now finding out about thisisnotawebsitedotcom i feel a little stupid.. then again i dont have the Book of Bill so maybe im lucky to know about it ???

#rocket talk #gravity falls #miss this show. anyway twink cipher fuckign jumpscared me

(3 notes)

👓 the-nerdiest-glasses Follow

Why Flatland counts as an object show: an essay

Keep reading

🔧 warp-pipe-sfx Follow

Why Flatland does NOT count as an object show: a rebuttal

Keep reading

���️ chainsaw-massacres Follow

why flatland isnt an object show: its a book + movie you assholes

#this argument is fucking stupid its just flatland

(3,821 notes)

🔘 join-my-evil-polycule-deactivated08142020 asked: Im going to tear apart your circuitboard until its broken irreparably

🌈 super-rainbow-epic-computer Follow

lol ok have fun w that 👍

also do u know any recipes for roasted pumpkin seeds the internets failing me rn and im cooking a big dinner for me and my bf

🔘 join-my-evil-polycule-deactivated08142020

Oh yeah sure https://www.jessicagavin.com/how-to-roast-pumpkin-seeds/#wprm-recipe-container-35845

🔘 join-my-evil-polycule-deactivated08142020

Wait why am I telling you this go die I hate you

🌈 super-rainbow-epic-computer Follow

thx for the help!

☝i-date-iconic-posts Follow

Date of origin: November 3rd, 2021

(216,025 notes)

❌ mephonex-deletes-your-favs Follow

~~Welcome to MePhoneX deletes your favs!!~~

I'm mod Xav (the only mod rn - -"), here to cause trauma to your favorite characters :)! PLEASE keep in mind that submissions will take a while to get to, because I have to photoshop out the limbs + background or even completely recreate someone's object if they're transparent!

The background flag is in the header and the X (recreated from an image of MePhoneX) I overlay on top is the profile picture if you want to make your own :) just @ this blog and I'll reblog it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~❌~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RULES ABOUT SUBMISSIONS:

NO INANIMATE INSANITY CONTESTANTS. I would like to avoid Apollo's Dodgeball thanks (plus it's insensitive)

No algebralien or algebralien-adjacent characters! I love those guys too I get it but I honestly don't have a good method of 'deleting' them planned. Feel free to do it on your own time though!

If someone asks me to take down a submission with them in it I will do it without questions. This is for a variety of reasons, but I think you get it.

Alright, that's it! Have fun :)

#not xed out #mod xav #pinned post #your fav is #your fave is #mephone #mephonex #inanimate insanity #ii2 finale

(681 notes)

📁 sticky-note-hit-post Follow

has anyone else wondered why this spaghetti code webbed site can connect across DIFFERENT UNIVERSES??? or is that just me

(2,416 notes)

🦀 thesamepictureofbaxtereveryday Follow

follow for the same picture of my crab every day!!!!! look at him :D

(3 notes)

anonymous asked: greeny how does it feel to be technically a higher being than most other people on the site

🟢 greenyguy Follow

sir this is a wendys

#i didnt order an existential crisis today :(

(37,102 notes)

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

todays liveblog!! B)

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

knife and suitcase made it to the finale!! hell yeah so proud of them

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

balloons talk with suitcase didnt go so well :/ i hope they can get some alone time without anyone else so they can like talk properly next time

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

mepad???

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

oh i think the finale challenge is happening

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

baseball looks worried but lightbulb's brushing him off :|

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

ojs backing away from paper??? wh

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

WHJDT THE FUCK

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

WAIT I HAVENT SEEN SOAP IN A WHILE WHERE IS SHE???

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

OH GOD

#mics ramblings #SOAP???!??

(11 notes)

anonymous asked: evil woman are so hot <3 i will do whatever you want queen

🌐 dr-who-could-never Follow

Awwww, this means a lot to me, anon! Could you find Film Reel for me and doxx him? That would be really helpful <3

#He's been evading me #It's really annoying #Hard to take over the world when I have to worry about him 🙄

(6 notes)

🥄 only-a-spoonful Follow

WHY DO I KEEP GETTING SENT ASKS ABOUT PREGNANCY?!

#I'M GOING TO QUIT TUMBLR AT THIS RATE.

(47,284 notes)

📗 journal-of-secrets Follow

if this fuckass hand keeps showing up at the edge of my vision i'm going to hit something

📗 journal-of-secrets Follow

#maybe hes in love with you

what the hell is wrong with you.

[wintfleur]

₊˚ෆ the start to a chaotic summer !

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( this ideas suddenly just came to me , I’ve been having sm fun working on smau posts since I’ve been having a hard time writing lately , I hope you guys enjoy it !! . . pls don’t mind the few mentions of the challengers I’m obsessed with that movie rn )

𐙚 summary ( a few posts showing what Stella has been up to as of lately now that her summer has started ! )

au masterlist - you can find everything under #👩🏻‍🎨 ͡ ꒱ Stella Hughes!

stellahughes added to their story !

[caption: smiling at me like that as if he didn’t just take my ability to walk ]

jackhughes replied to your story ‘ESTELLA WTF’

jackhughes reacted with 🤮

_quinnhughes replied to your story ‘some things you just gotta keep to yourself stink 😐’

lhughes_06 replied to your story ‘Stella please stop this I’m disgusted, and it’s not even 1pm’

lhughes_06 reacted with 🍅

luca.fantilli reacted with 🤤

ahndaesee replied to your story ‘Princess the wording umm 🧐 ’

stellahughes OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAYDBDJ

markestapa replied to your story ‘in public?? Pookie I was unfamiliar with your game 😮‍💨’

stellahughes MARK PLS YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT YOU WERE LITERALLY THERE ???

_alexturcotte replied to your story ‘have some decorum hughes goodness’

rutgermcgroarty replied to your story ‘babe I don’t think you worded this the best…’

stellahughes oh really ?? I couldn’t tell 😲

Lilybaileys replied to your story ‘STELLA YOU FREAKY GAL 🤭’

carmenbarlowe replied to your story ‘bestie I can’t keep defending you 😶’

ryan.leno_4 replied to your story ‘IVE BEEN A NASTY GIRL NASTY. IS SOMEBODY GONNA MATCH MY FREAK ??? 😌’

stellahughes RYAN PLEASE 😭

nicolassturniolo replied to your story GIRL 😭

stellahughes I meant from the workout we did 😭 the gym workout 😭 you know with weights and treadmills 😭

edwards.73 replied with ‘😟’

stellahughes i didn’t mean it like that 😣

pshoon2002 replied to your story ‘count your days mcgroarty. count your fucking days 😑’

stellahughes

liked by bboeser, arberxhekaj_, simjaeyunn and others

🎵 HOT TO GO! - Chappell Roan

stellahughes: it’s training season, let’s get back to winning 😽

view all comments

username she’s coming back for her crown!!!

username please she never lost it.

username the ice princess is back!!!!

username ESTELLA HUGHES WOMANS WORLD FIGURE SKATING CHAMPION TWO YEARS IN A ROW !!

username NO SILVER OLYMPIC MEDALIST ESTELLA HUGHES ‼️

username pls I can’t wait for the edits

username i’m still not over the breakin dishes one 🤭

markestapa training stella is scary

edwards.73 and mean

stellahughes I’m not mean I’m just determined 😐 @/edwards.73

rutgermcgroarty it’s sexy dw baby 😮‍💨 @/stellahughes

stellahughes oh is it? 🤭 @/rutgermcgroarty

markestapa you guys disgust me.

nicohischier I will be cheering you on Estella!!

stellahughes you want me so bad omg 🤭

jackhughes omfg stella go away @/stellahughes

stellahughes NO YOU GO AWAY YOU JEALOUS BITCH HE WAS TALKING TO ME @/jackhughes

nicohischier guys please calm down.

stellahughes yes sir 😌

amberglenniceskater let’s go Stella!!!

stellahughes AMBERRR ML 🫶🏻

isabeau.levito USA USA USA ‼️

stellahughes THEY ARE NOT READY FOR US 🤭

_willsmith2 STELLAAA ‼️

stellahughes WILLL ‼️

_quinnhughes i definitely have the coolest sister

stellahughes nooo I have the coolest brother 🫶🏻

jackhughes brothers !! PLURAL you have the coolest BROTHERS @/stellahughes

stellahughes I know what I said @/jackhughes

rutgermcgroarty pretty girl 😍

rutgermcgroarty blessing my feed fr 😍 god slide six 😮‍💨

rutgermcgroarty have I told you I love you today??

rutgermcgroarty I LOVE YOU 🩷

rutgermcgroarty sometimes it still blows my mind how lucky I am 😻 like me ?? Dating an Olympic silver medalist. Fuck I’m so lucky I love love love you 🩷

stellahughes babe 😭 please come over so we can make out.

username pls can the 2026 Winter Olympics come any sooner 😭

username pls shes so aesthetically pleasing 🤭

username AHHH YAY THE ICONIC STELLA SUMMER PHOTO DUMPS ARE BACK ‼️

simjaeyunn you already won the number one spot in my heart 😻

rutgermcgroarty IM SORRY???

pshoon2002 Jake I beg you put the phone down.

ahndaesee chat he’s getting bold 😭😭

stellahughes oh! Thanks Jake? 🫶🏻

ahndaesee bless your oblivious sweet soul @/stellahughes

notriki MOTHER IS MOTHERING 😌

stellahughes my child 🫶🏻

rutgermcgroarty since when did we have a child 🧍‍♂️@/stellahughes

stellahughes surprise 🥳 @/rutgermcgroarty

notriki hi dad! @/rutgermcgroarty

lhughes_06 I still haven’t recovered from that god awful green drink

stellahughes it’s not for the week lukey

lhughes_06 calling me lukey and then basically saying I’m week, in the same sentence is crazyyy 👎🏻

ahndaesee my superstar 🫶🏻

stellaughes my pretty dahee 🫶🏻

ryan.leno_4 my body still hasn’t recovered since you took us to that pilates class

stellahughes we have to go again so your body can get used to it!

gabeperreault44 NO NO NO ❌

_willsmith2 please no.

umichhockey our Olympic silver medalist 🫶🏻

stellahughes I love you admin 🫶🏻

christophersturniolo so when are you teaching me??

stellahughes when are you coming to visit hmm?

nicolassturniolo *US you mean

matthew.sturniolo YouTube vid idea ???

stellahughes I’m not going to go easy on you guys 😼

christophersturniolo LETS GOOOO

_connorbedard good luck Stella 🔥

stellahughes thank you con !! 🫶🏻

masonmctavish23 let’s go Stella !! 🔥

_quinnhughes lets go stink, so so proud of you! ❤️

stellahughes I love you quinny :(

trevorzegras STINK

jackhughes STINK STINK

colecaufield STINKKKKK

cam.york LITTLE STINK IS ALL GROWN UP

_alexturcotte STINK ‼️

stellahughes I hate you guys, please it’s not funny anymore 😭

lhughes_06 no no it’s still funny

williamnylander can’t wait to watch you win Estella! Miss you!

stellahughes thank you Willy! I miss you tons 🫶🏻

tatemcrae my girl my girl 😻

stellahughes mine mine mine 😻

usfigureskating our girl is back !!

stellahughes back n better 😽

stellahughes

liked by _slafkovsky_ , dixiedamelio , barzal97 and others

🏷️ jackhughes colecaufield trevorzegras

🎵Maneater - Nelly Furtado

stellahughes: rip cole n jack , me and trev totally dominated their asses 💋

view all comments

jackhughes please never say you dominated my ass again you freak

jackhughes besides it’s Cole’s fault, he can’t hit a racket to save his life…or mine!

colecaufield yeah well you were shit at golf and you act like I would want to save your life anyway 🖕🏻

trevorzegras we really did a number on them @/stellahughes they are still arguing 🤣

stellahughes @/jackhughes @/colecaufield it’s okay, we will go easy on you in darts 💋

Lilybaileys I am channeling my inner tashi this summer

stellahughes ART PLS IM ON MY KNEES 😫 IM TRYING TO BE MRS DONALDSON BY THE END OF THE SUMMER 😫

rutgermcgroarty babe what🧍‍♂️@/stellahughes

carmenbarlowe okay but Patrick tho…. 🤭

stellahughes THE WAY I WOULD MATCH HIS FREAK PERFECTLY IN A WAY THAT IS CONCERNING TO FEMINISM 😵‍💫

rutgermcgroarty sighs

username Please Stella being in love with art and Patrick is so real 😭

username her outfits always eat goddd 😫

username JACK IS SO PRETTY AHHH

username Stella + art and Patrick fanfic is not a want, it’s a need.

rutgermcgroarty please don’t, she’s already up all night reading them and watching edits 😭

tarayummyy ur so hot babes imyyy

stellahughes i miss you moreee 💋

_alexturcotte can’t believe you went without me.

stellahughes ITS NOT MY FAULT YOH MISSED UR FLIGHT

luca.fantilli lookin good Stella 👀

stellahughes come back pls :(

username she’s so pretty sobs 💔

username can Rutger fight??

rutgermcgroarty you wouldn’t even know how to handle her bud

username THE ICONIC FOUR IS BACK TOGETHER ‼️

username no one will understand how much I love Stella’s relationship with Cole and Trevor 😭

colecaufield good games or whatever 🙄

stellahughes don’t be upset Cole! It’s not your fault Jack dragged you down 🫶🏻

jackhughes don’t be afraid to come downstairs, it’s on sight you brat.

_quinnhughes I’ll make sure to come next time!

stellahughes pls pls pls we missed you (mostly me because I missed actual good competition)

jackhughes I am actually going to fight you.

_quinnhughes she would win that as well 🤣

lhughes_06 thanks for the invite 🙄

stellahughes you were to busy sucking face with Ethan and Daisy to see that I texted you 10 times.

rutgermcgroarty Stella the skirts are driving me crazy 😵‍💫

stellahughes why do you think I wear them? 🤭

jackhughes I can’t stand you guys.

simjaeyunn what are you not good at 😻

pshoon2002 driving, playing hide and seek, swimming, writing in cursive…the list is quite long actually.

stellahughes WHY ARE YOU MY BIGGEST HATER 😭‼️

pshoon2002 IM NOT IM JUST TRYING TO PROTECT YOU FROM JAKES DELUSIONAL ASS ‼️

simjaeyunn Stella is this guy bothering you 😾

ahndaesee my superstar is always on top 🫶🏻

stellahughes my number one supporter 🫶🏻

rutgermcgroarty ‼️ LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER ‼️

ahndaesee gtfo rut don’t ruin this for me 😾

stellahughes pls guys don’t fight, their is enough of me to go around ���

rutgermcgroarty I DONT LIKE TO SHARE

pshoon2002 Stella doesn’t like selfish guys

stellahughes HOONIE WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

username pls why is Stella’s comment sections always so chaotic

username Daisy and ruts beef is hilarious

username Stella, daisy and sunghoon best childhood friends ‼️

markestapa I’d let her fuck me with a racket 🏓

lhughes_06 MARK?!?!

jackhughes TF DID YOU JUST SAY TO MY SISTER?!?!

markestapa ITS A QUOTE FROM THE MOVIE I SWEAR

markestapa POOKIE PLS HELP ME @/stellahughes

edwards.73 pls I can’t breathe 😭

username like I said chaotic 😭

stellahughes

liked by _alexturcotte , _eliaspettersson , g.brindley4 and others

🎵 coming home - Beabadoobee

stellahughes: the prettiest views + jack n trev

view all comments

jackhughes there is way to much kissing going on here 😾

jackhughes what’s that’s supposed to mean ??

jackhughes for your information, I’m by far more prettier than you

stellahughes plss 😭 jack when did you get so funny??

trevorzegras are you saying me and Jack not pretty?

stellahughes 🤐

dylanduke25 I’m still recovering from that dinner 🤒

tyler__duke5 wdym I’m a great cook?

nick_moldenhauer great is a strong work bud

stellahughes you almost lit my kitchen AND Nick on fire 😰

tyler__duke5 ‘almost’ being the key word okay 👍🏻

Lilybaileys mark almost falling in the fire out was the best part of my night ☺️

markestapa just say you want me okay 😏

luca.fantilli miss you Stella :(

stellahughes I miss you more !! You and Adam get your asses here asap !!

adamfantilli yes ma’am 🫡

edwards.73 I’m still in shock from that criminal minds ep

LiamBarlowe I don’t think we will ever be the same 😖

stellahughes you guys are so dramatic omg 😭

trevorzegras Luke face planting into the water five seconds after you took that pic was the highlight of my day

stellahughes I thought we lost him ngl

jackhughes the Hughes do summer the best!

jackhughes would be a perfect summer if I don’t have to see you and rut kiss and touch each other all the time 😒

username everyone say thank you Stella for feeding us this summer!

username the iconic faceless pictures are back!

username love them but I miss her face 😭

lhughes_06 I’m pretty sure I still have water in my nose and ears

lhughes_06 also can we all vote that Tyler is never in charge of cooking again

stellahughes LEAVE TYLER ALONE YOU PUNK only I can bully him

colecaufield you always make the summers better stells! ❤️

stellahughes I love you coley ☹️ (let’s go get breakfast)

colecaufield I’m getting the keys rn

mackie.samo I’m still sick from all the s’mores stell

stellahughes please I haven’t left my bed 😭

jacob_truscott20 STELLA HUGHES THE UNDEFEATED QUEEN OF BEER PONG ‼️

stellahughes hmm it’s so comfy on my throne 😇

lhughes_06 someone please humble her

edwards.73 that’s no way to talk to your queen lukey

lhughes_06 omfg

markestapa MY BEAUTIFUL QUEEN 🙇‍♂️

_alexturcotte the way I witnessed you pushing rut into the lake after he took that first picture of you 😟

stellahughes I wanted him to take off his shirt 🤷🏻‍♀️

rutgermcgroarty YOU COULD HAVE JUST ASKED

username Stella and rut are actually the cutest ever

username I love Stella’s relationship with all the guys!

username that’s their little sister !!

ahndaesee your ass looks great in that picture

edwards.73 BABE ??

lhughes_06 Baby pls stop looking at my sisters ass 😐

stellahughes look @/ahndaesee men trying to tell us woman, what to do 🙄

ahndaesee disgusting you two.

edwards.73 PRETTY I DIDNT EVEN SAY ANYTHING @/ahndaesee

_quinnhughes I’m never letting you drive the boat again.

stellahughes it was an accident, no one got hurt ☹️

trevorzegras i literally fell out of the boat Stella

stellahughes but it was funny! @/trevorzegras

_quinnhughes okay yeah ur right it was funny

trevorzegras wtf Quinn 😐

username pls Quinn and Trevor are so funny 😂

username boat Stella is the best Stella

rutgermcgroarty ur so cute baby, I can’t wait for more summers with you 🩷

stellahughes you make my summers (life) better rut 🩷

username AHH THE PICTURES OF HER AND RUT

username HIS COMMENT PLS IM GONNA SOB

username PLEASE THE WAY HES HOLDING HER 😭

username awe Daisy and Stella cuddled up on the couch watching criminal minds 😭

carmenbarlowe I will never be able to look at that hot tub the same Stella 😐

stellahughes MINNIE PLS WE APOLOGIZED ALREADY 🙏

rutgermcgroarty we weren’t even doing anything crazy 🙄

jackhughes WTF ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT, AM I GONNA HAVE TO BUY A NEW HOT TUB ??

stellahughes omfg we were just kissing

stellahughes added to their story !

[caption: not rut trying to erase our love @/ahndaesee 😐]

ahndaesee replied to your story ‘rutger mcgroarty count your fucking days’

stellahughes he’s sleeping on the couch tn 🙄

rutgermcgroarty replied to your story ‘you’re mine 😾’

stellahughes I love when you are possessive. But know your place 🩷 (I love you, but I love my wife)

lhughes_06 replied to your story ‘let’s go rut! Taking one for the team 💪🏻’

stellahughes 🙄👎🏻

simjaeyunn replied to your story ‘how dare he…you should break up with him 😌’

stellahughes don’t be silly Jake, I’m just being dramatic 🫶🏻

dylanduke25 replied to your story ‘oh, the d isn’t for me?”

stellahughes DYLAN PLS 😭

Lilybaileys replied to your story ‘that’s our sacred tree that mf 😠’

carmenbarlowe reacted with 😱

LiamBarlowe replied to your story ‘not him messing with the sacred tree’

stellahughes RIGHT ?! 😾 (miss you come back to Michigan pls)

markestapa replied to your story ‘oh he can mess with the tree but I can’t 🙄’

stellahughes don’t be jealous pookie 😽

stellahughes

liked by adamfantilli , mollyannmcg , _willsmith2 and others

🏷️ ahndaesee

🎵How Sweet - NewJeans

stellahughes: my pretty wife took me out on a date today 😻

view all comments

📍 ahndaesee happy wife happy life 🥰

stellahughes happy WIVES happy LIVES 😻

rutgermcgroarty @/ahndaesee she’s literally laying right next to me rn in my shirt btw.

ahndaesee ya don’t you know how sweet it tastes ?? 🍭

rutgermcgroarty you DON’T know how sweet it tastes 😾

stellahughes RUT PLS ENOUGH 😭

username this is so pretty stop

username Stella and Daisy are the best duo mhm ‼️

username Prettiest best friends 💕

Lilybaileys about to get in my homewrecker era 😻

stellahughes we don’t live together

Lilybaileys stella pls you gotta stop quoting the challengers 😓

markestapa MRS STEAL YOUR GURLL 😎

markestapa please ethan is a pouting mess rn he’s having Daisy withdrawals

stellahughes it’s deserved. now he knows how I feel 😾

lhughes_06 stop stealing my gf :/

stellahughes it’s not stealing if she willingly came 😼

lhughes_06 why is reading that making me so uncomfortable.

elblue6 you girls are so pretty 💕

stellahughes I love you mom 😽🩷

ahndaesee thank you Ellen 😭🫶🏻

pshoon2002 without me 😓

stellahughes stop being dramatic and come visit 🫶🏻 (PLEASE)

edwards.73 😐

stellahughes 👰🏻‍♀️ 👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏻 👰🏻‍♀️

edwards.73 I HATE YOU

stellahughes ur gf doesn’t 😮‍💨

username I love how close they are!!

username pls Luke and Ethan’s comments are taking me out 😭

username the nails are so pretty 🥰

rutgermcgroarty wow I am so lucky to have STELLA as MY GIRLFRIEND 🥰

ahndaesee 🙄

rutgermcgroarty I’m seeking for a promotion in our relationship 😌

rutgermcgroarty my eyes have been blessed 😍

stellahughes baby stop flirting with me in the comments and flirt with me in person pls

rutgermcgroarty bet 😏

username THE STRAWBERRIES 🍓 😋

username Stella please I am not your strongest soldier 😍

username cutest couple ever 🩷

rutgermcgroarty @/ahndaesee it’s on sight.

ahndaesee you heard the people 😇

lhughes_06 how do I dislike this post.

rutgermcgroarty ur asking the right questions.

mackie.samo LETS GO GIRLS ‼️

tyler__duke5 bring me some of those strawberries I’ll make us some pancakes

stellahughes if it’s in Daisy’s aprentment I’m down!

ahndaesee last time you cooked in my kitchen my apartment almost burned down @/tyler__duke5

tyler__duke5 okay but it was an accident ☹️

stellahughes yeah Daisy , it was an accident ☹️

carmenbarlowe I’m in love 🥰

ahndaesee you want us sooo bad 🤭

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( this took me way to long omg 😭 I rlly hope you guys enjoyed it — please let me know what you guys think !! This genuinely took me forever . . . I also have another smau in the work !! )

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( ahndaesee/daisy is an oc created by my bestie @qoqurt and everyone should go check her out pls !! So a few people in the smau might be a little confusing . . . So pshoon2002/sunghoon is Stella and Daisy’s childhood friend and is also in the kpop group enhypen !!! simjaeyunn/ jake and notriki/niki are also part of the group , just wanted to clear any confusion !! )

°. — taglist ( @cixrosie @toasttt11 @lovings4turn @bunbunbl0gs @petite-potato4 @winterbarnesblog @yoontwin @iceflwers )

©️WINTFLEUR

[sofs16]

our love in photos

part 1: paddock day , part 2: our leclerc win — next

charles_leclerc

liked by 4,282,393 others

charles_leclerc P1 babyyyyyy! Week here in Barcelona shows we should keep pushing, even on the last lap🏎️

view all 832,272 comments

ynchaaa IS THAT YN SHE DIDNT WEAR A POLO WHAT

⤷ yncharles.16 WHAT. PARENTS?

⤷ charlottecharles1 thank god they broke up

⤷ charleeeeee but they just had their one year anniv? ⤷ gossipxxwag yall she was literally at the garage. what are u on😭

june 23, 2024

yn

liked by 3,272,484 others

yn barcelonaaaa gp! my favorite one for reasons the whole world knows;) baby got p1 and then i heard a broke up? huh. he’s stuck with me and chained to my bed so he can’t leave. if he’s with someone else that’s me in a wig 😘 stay jealous haters xx

view all 372,585 comments

landonorris the bed part wasn’t necessary

⤷ yn i didnt mean it like that DIRTY MJND DUMBASSSSSS

⤷landonorris Oh. Nevermind

charles_leclerc I’d be crazy to not end up with you. ❤️

⤷ yn biting my lip and kicking my feet 😊

yourbsf CRAZY IN LOOVEEEEE

carlossainz55 The last photo is very questionable

june 23, 2024

charles_leclerc

liked by 5,383,594 others

tagged yn

charles_leclerc a summer well spent ☀️

view all 722,744 comments

charchar1 did you win pingpong 🤭

⤷ charles_leclerc Of course! ⤷ yn i almost believed you babe

⤷ carlossainz55 expound please

june 27, 2024

yn

monte carlo, monaco

liked by charles_leclerc, fernandoalo_oficial, and 3,383,484 others yn late summaaaa diaries 🫀🩰🎧📜

ps. why do u guys think sharl didnt post a pic of himself playing LOLLLL

view all 238,292 comments

ynsmodel WHAT DOES SHE NOT DO. charleslando mother feeding us the content we deserve 😌

charles_leclerc No one had to know, baby…

⤷ yn im competitive, i cant lose to my boyfriend in PINGPONG

⤷ charles_leclerc Well the photo was not needed!

⤷ yn youre cute

⤷ charles_leclerc Oh, well thank you. ❤️

⤷landonorris LOL HE FOLDED SO QUICKLY IM LAUGHIGN

⤷ yn shut up norris, only i can bully him

june 28, 2024

yn

liked by charles_leclerc, and 7,383,494 others

yn DNF today but still the proudest of charles 💌 i simply do not understand why the car suddenly lost engine right before the race but fine, god works in mysterious ways. next week we will come back stronger. we will, and should, always support charles, as well as carlos. forza ferrari ❤️ [COMMENTS HAVE BEEN DISABLED]

charles_leclerc instagram story:

“luckiest to have her😘”

yn

liked by charles_leclerc, and 5,595,695 others yn hiiii lovelies! @yn.jpg up and runnin! enjoy ❤️‍🩹

view all 722,474 comments

charlessgirl so glad we made the right girl famous (thanks charles)

⤷ yn 🥹😭

yn.jpg

liked by charles_leclerc, and 272,494 others

yn.jpg who else did u think id post first? (d1🫀)

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lando.jpg Um. Me? ⤷ yn.jpg next time babes

charles_leclerc ❤️❤️❤️

yn.jpg

liked by lando.jpg, and 217,282 others

yn.jpg day 2! landitooooo my photographer bff alongside danny ❤️

view all 23,483 comments

yn.jpg

liked by 322,474 others

yn.jpg day 3: my 2nd fav driver 🏎️

view all 11,484 comments

fernandoalo.oficial una fotógrafa muy buena y linda 💪tú y charles sois unos afortunados a very good and beautiful photographer 💪you and charles are a lucky

⤷ yn TE QUIEROOOO FONSO!! buena suerte hoy i love you fonso!! good luck today

[fernandoalo.oficial and charles_leclerc liked]

yn.jpg

liked by charles_leclerc, and 4,484,494 others

yn.jpg i lov my boyfirend it hurts so much he’s so perfeet and kind and everuthing ive ever wanted im so grateufl i msis him osuch

view all 264,585 comments

charles_leclerc I love you amour but.. are you okay?

⤷ yourbsf yn got drunk on my watch sorry

charles_leclerc baby please answer the phone

⤷ yn.jpg fiflvoroyu

[thepiratefish]

Prime defenders if there was tumblr.

1 [2] 3 4 ???

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🐺Fiddlemcgee follow

Why aren't there more Fics of Wavelength and Tide just hanging out?? I once saw wavelength topple over because of stomach pains, and instead of continuing the fight, they both started showing each other pictures of their kids and talking about them until they agreed to settle the battle later.

Why don't we have more funny fics of them acting like that??

‼️BLORGUMS🌟 follow

Fics where they act like that and kiss.

🐺Fiddlemcgee follow

fics where they act like that and kiss.......

779

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💥BUNGOBINGboNG‼️follow

Shoutout to WispMysterys for actually adventuring into ACTUAL haunted places and getting arrested for it, were on your side, buddy keep doing your thing

👻WispMysterys456🐺 follow

Thanks man

💥BUNGOBINGboNG‼️follow

WISPMYSTRYS456?!?!?!?!

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💜ThatsAlotOfAshe🎧

I'll be streaming minecraft later today with the Hero Tide since you all wanted it so badly. Join in around 6, collaborate with @👻WispMysterys456🐺 happening around next week 👍

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👤Hero-Updates-Central. follow

[ALT:Screenshot of post of the Hero Tide with the username '💙TidetheTidalhero🌊' reading `Dose anyone know where to find a good Pizzaplace? My boys are sick and I want to get them there favourite food!`

Water Hero Tide Has a child / multipule? More updates on this situation will be updated soon.

455

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🎵Killingwithcunt🎵 follow

We all should attack David bells Office more often actual <3

✖️Villanova-Gal-Deactivated

Actually, you shouldn't! >:(

🎵Killingwithcunt🎵 follow

You say this, but even fleas wouldn't touch your rotted skin as it is so unholy the devil wouldn't even stand amongst you

DanielDuck🦆follow

Op said this and they immediately died where they stood 🧍‍♂️

736

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🌼UtopiaEgg🌼 follow

Putting a fake frog on top of a comicly large red X to lure lefrog under it to then crush them with a piano,

🌼UtopiaEgg🌼 follow

[ALT: an image of the villain lefrog crushed under a piano.]

I DIDNT MEAN TO ACTUALY DO IT

🐶Pugpuppet🐺 follow

Oh my God, it finally happened... he's dead...

🌺LefrogFrogFan🐸 follow

THIS IS WORSE THEN THE POSSESED LE FROG ARC

40,000

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RATRATRATRATRAT🐀🐀🐀🗡 follow

Hwe tuyr

Wavelength-Offcial⚙️ follow

How do you not know how to type

Waelng gel heo tue hi 👋 whau he fu man ma u in copuer help help help help ge ou

Wavelength-Offcial⚙️ follow

Stay there I'm gonna teach you how to type

8573

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Smokrslourp💨 follow

A man just ate a rat on the sidewalk thepn ran away on all fours I fucking hate this place

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[feelo-fick]

WELCOME TO PHIO'S EXTREMELY SELF INDULGENT AU HOUR!!!

"Oh, FINALLY, another visitor! It's so quiet in here, it's unnerving..."

—

This AU was meant to be posted on halloween but eh.... Happy Thanksgiving? HAHAHHA

still dont have a name for it, but basically, back in october i was suddenly hit with the need to have a halloween au, so now we have ghost-ified prismo and vampire/witch-ified scarab :D ( although didnt finish the scarab reference spread in time because uh, school and i lost motivation unfortunately )

au synopsis and rambling below the cut!!

the premise of this au is simple : scarab is a real estate agent whos known for his manners ( never barges in, always waits to be invited! though it is a little weird how he keeps asking to be let inside even if they already agreed that he was going to come over... ) and efficiency at his job - that is, convincing people to buy high-end housing for a good price. although his social skills need some... work, his ability to persuade people isnt something to be laughed at.

unfortunately for him, persuading the higher-ups is a completely different story - which he learned the hard way after flunking something big for the company. they dont choose to fire him, no. instead, they put him through a trial, assigning him to sell their most unprofitable property : the mansion in a small town locally known for being haunted by an "evil spirit". if scarab manages to sell it (for good profit) within six months, he is excused and is able to go on with his job. if not... well, best not to think about it, yes? after all, he'll succeed with ease - all he has to do is dispel any worries about some fake "ghost" that only exists as a result of filthy rumors. maybe clean up the place. not too hard, right?

meanwhile, stuck inside said mansion is an extremely bored prismo. hes been hangin around this place for like... how many years now? forty? a hundred? meh, all the same, lately the place has been quieter than usual. i mean- of course people dont just walk into a creepy mansion every day, but there would usually be at least a few bold kids or vloggers coming in now and then for him to entertain but even then they wouldn't stay long ( for obvious reasons ). and now, just some unbound spirits or dumb animals would pass by and thats about it. a guy can only entertain himself for so long, yknow?

that is, until today. when some posh-looking business man entered the premises and started snooping around ( whats the deal with that, by the way?? ). must be prismo's lucky day!! this is the perfect chance to pull out all the stops and play the FUNNIEST prank ever! hah!

... oh. looks like things've gotten a little out of hand.

—

WOOT WOOT WOOTTTTTTTTTTT!!! im so so happy to finish this because ohhhhh my god this has taken ages for no reason other than the fact that ive been really dragging myself to make presentable art JSNDJSJXNSJX.... i realize that i have never worked in real estate ( or at all ) which means i have probably fucked something up but uhh um ill deal with the backlash later :"D im also realizing how many odd unanswered bits and bobs this au is going to have in the future, which... i am ignoring for the most part for now, but there are SOME things that i DO have figured out like ghost lore... but thats for another time, for now i leave you with this >:)

[machiten]

thats my seat!

academic rival scaramouche x gn!reader headcanons

warnings: scaramouche(bro is a whole warning), foul language(it's scaramouche we're talking about here so), reader is mentioned to have bad eyesight, fights, angst, academic validation, bad parenting

barely proofread lmao im tired, it's 3:15 am and im starving. there will be a chapter 2 ofc i just wanted to post something goddamn my blog has been empty for so long (4 days) didn't have a way to keep track of the word count but it's kinda long. anyways hope u enjoy!!

oh god

when i say rival, i mean full on brawls on the school hallway

so let's say you've been top of your school since day one. your name has always been at the top of the score board every exam, always class representative, and well known as a smart kid ever since you steped on school premises.

you work hard to keep your grades up, your parents pay enough attention to your succesful brother and none for you

having a successful brother plants high expectations on you. i mean, he did very well, so why cant you? you both have the same blood running through your veins. your parent's praise, that is all you've ever wanted. and yet you're not even informed if there's a family outing, leaving you in your house alone

it has been like that for years

not until one day, you enter into the classroom and someone else is sitting in your chair. someone unfamiliar is sitting on your chair.

"hey, excuse me. i sit there." you pointed at what is supposed to be, your chair. "what, i dont see any names on it." Ok, what. when you finally look up to the culprit, my goodness. Fierce purple eyes that looks like it holds the entire universe, his skin as fair as a maiden, lips plum as a springs fruit, a beauty mark at the underside of his right eye, and his hair a unique color of indigo that is cut in a weird jellyfish-ish hairstyle. while yes, he looks ethereal, not gonna lie (if he had longer hair you might've mistaken him as a girl) his personality certainly does not match his elegance. an annoyed look currently adorned his face, as if you disturbed his peace.

"done checking me out? i know im hot, i get that look everyday so dont ever think you're special." and now it changed into a cocky smirk. the nerve! not only is he sitting on someone else's chair but it seems like his head is getting bigger too. "well excuse me, i havent seen your around school until today so im guessing that you're the transfer student our teacher talked about last week. but do you mind finding a new spot, i sit there." you glared at him.

"no i like it here. here's a better idea, why don't you find a new spot. im the new student here, show some courtesy."

"no- what, go away thats my seat!"

"alright everyone, settle down- oh, i see that the new student is here already," the teacher finally came in the classroom, cup of steaming hot coffee in his hand. Everyone sat down on their seats while you are still standing up waiting for this person to look for another seat. Lmao guess what, he didnt move.

"(name), c'mon sit down. i know getting a new friend is exiting but we have to greet the new student properly. now go find your seat."

"wait but sir--"

"sit down, (name)"

"yeah that's right (name), sit down" a voice beside you spoke. you looked over to the new student adorning a triumphant grin at your loss. and so you are now forced to sit at the back, barely seeing what's in front because of your poor eyesight, and wearing a vengeful spirit.

epic first meeting

the seats in the back are okay, its breezy and you now sit next to xiao (his music taste is so good) but yeah, you cant really see the board clearly so you get notes from mona at the front

at first, it was a one sided rivalry. how hated how rude and bratty he was and at that time, he didnt seem too care (like he get those everyday). but then he started fighting back and oh boy he hasn't had this much fun in years!

the way you retort back to his harsh words is so amusing to him. usually, no one would dare talk to him in a degrading manner but then you came into his life, claiming that he's sitting on your chair, and it was never the same ever again.

now, he looks forward to everyday. he rises up earlier so that he can sit at your chair first, he keeps looking at the classroom door everytime someone enters (in case it's you so that he can give that shit eating grin), he loves how your face gets messed up when he wins an argument, he loves how small your hands are compared to his when you have a brawl in the hallways, and most of all, he loves it when you give him the shit eating grin when you win something (he says he let's you win sometimes because he pitied you, but is it really?)

to him, this is fun, amusing, entertaining. but to you? you've never felt this much hate in a human being, ever.

scaramouche is smart as fuck and he demonstrated that loud and clear

he aced the math test that the teacher gave that wasn't even taught to him

in presentations, he speaks loud and clear and you can really understand the point he's making

he doesn't really like group works (you noticed) but if he was put in a group, he does most of the job flawlessly

sports? oh of course. he's really good at baseball (pitcher). he's also good at other sports but not as good as baseball

oh and pray that you don't get him as your opponent in debates, you will be grilled like a brisket

did i mention he sleeps in like 70% of his classes? it's not like the teachers can do anything about it. he excels in everything, at least let him sleep as a gift

the only times he would be awake is when he pulls on your strings

but of course, you're also good in all of these, that's why you both are rivals

you fight almost everyday for the top spot (and for your original seat) to the point where its a daily routine to everyone else to see you both pinching and arguing in the classroom

He doesn't have any close friends (ahem childeahem) and it's either bc ppl are intimidated by him or he just doesnt give a fuck about friends

maintaining grades is one thing, winning against him is another

you are very intellegent, yes, but you work very hard for your grades every night. losing sleep studying for upcoming quizes and making sure your projects are perfect. unlike him who doesnt even try

you havent seen him study once

and it makes you see yourself lower. you're both equally in par with your grades but thats when he doesn't even try. what happens when he takes everything seriously? what if he studies as hard as you do? where will you stand then?

but when you got 2nd place for the 3rd time this year, he took it too far

"what the hell?! this is the third time!" you looked at the results in the bulletin board expecting to see your name in first place. you studied hard, right? so then why,,,

"oh oops, looks like i did a little too well again this time. aw and i didn't even answer some of the questions because i felt bad for beating you the last two times." a snicker is heard behind you and sure enough, piercing indigo eyes is looking at yours in pure pity. "thanks i guess. are you happy now? that's three times in a row!" aether beside you is now having a deadpan expression, expecting the worst. 'alright here we go again'.

"oh yes very, you know what makes me even happier? your declaration that you're inferior to me. why do you even try anyways, it's clear to everyone that im better. you're just wasting your time burying your head in your books and notes when we both already know who's coming at the top. imagine not meeting your parent's expectations." he's now looking down on you, beating you up with words that you know damn well are true. but that doesn't mean you're not gonna fight back.

"what."

"oh you know, maybe if you tried harder, the cost of your education might be worth it for your parents. honestly, if i we're them id--"

before he could finish his sentence, a loud echoing smack is heard all across the hallway, making everyone's attention turn to the commotion. scaramouche head is now turned the other way, his cheeks beginning to flare from the hit as he glared at the culprit, you. "you motherfucking bitc-!" you tackled him and due to surprise, he fell back. aether is now alert, shouting your name trying to get you to your senses.

you gripped scramouche's collar, rasing his head from the floor and slamming it back down. "you're an asshole, you know that?! i try my best everyday and this is what i get?!!" he fights back, hand on your arm that's trying to get a hold of his hair and another on your neck, holding back your weight.

"you don't know what it's like!! you will never know what it's like being compared to your brother everytime they get a chance!! you dont know what it's like going home to nothing but words of disappointment when you did everything you can to get their approval!! you will never know what it's like for your efforts to go to waste!! you will never know the feeling of being kicked out of your own home and live in a run down apartment!! i work day and night, i lose sleep everyday, i barely have anything for myself to live, and now i have to deal with your ass every single day too?!!"

"(name)! calm down, hey-!"

"fuck off aether!"

every word you spat pricked scaramouche's heart and made him struggle from your assaults. this isn't fun anymore. he knew a bit of your situation, kazuha told him. but he never knew it was this bad. all he knew is about your parent's expectations. he didn't even attempt to fight back this time and just defends himself from your blows. 'shit, i took it too far.'

"you dont have to remind me of my incompetence! i already know, i know damn well i will never be enough!! you're right, why do i even try, right?! you're so fucking annoying, doing everything so effortlessly, like school is a nuisance!! can't i take a fucking break?!!" at this point, you cannot control your tears from falling into his cheeks, rolling down his porcelain skin.

"what are you--?!"

"why can't i be a genius like you?! why dont i have everything that you have?!! i did everything i can, what am i doing wrong?!" you are now saying intangible words that no one can decipher because of the mess of emotions you are feeling at that moment. you're about to deliver another blow when someone held you back.

"(name)! you're doing too much! thats enough!!" goddamn she is stronger than i thought, scaramouche deals with this everyday?? aether pulled you away from the tangled mess that you and scaramouche managed to create. you're struggling his hold but after a bit, you slumped down having no more strength to keep going, sobbing quietly. "...(name)?" aether said.

"...i am so tired of everything, why do i even keep trying. i.. i just want to make my parents proud..." sniffles could be heard from where you are being held my aether's arms. aether supported you from the groud and led you away from the scene and the prying eyes of other students. before you both can disappear completely, aether turned around and gave scaramouche a threatening glare. "i know you both bicker a lot but you took it too far. you are an asshole and you better change that attitude of yours or i will send you home even worse than your condition right now." and you both are gone.

scaramouche is still sitting on the floor, his arm supporting his weight, bruises are forming in his skin while he's craddling his cheek that is now very noticeably red and flaring from the slap you served him earlier. he doesn't know how to act, really. should he apologize? should he just walk away and like nothing happened? should he report you for physical abuse? he didn't know anything.

what he does know though is that he fucked up, big time. he knows that you'll never want to see his face ever again, he knows that nothing will be the same again, and he knows thag the feelings he has will never be reciprocated, after what he's done.

he actually just found out recently, when someone from the other class was making fun of you and he didn't like it one bit, he's the only one allowed to make fun of you, everyone back off. scaramouche can see the crowd dissipating, no longer interested since the main action is gone. he sat there on the floor the whole time, rethinking his life choices, wondering if he said things differently instead of those. would he be seeing you tomorrow? will you still argue with him about nonsensical bullshit? can he still hold your hand whenever you pinch him?

he heard footsteps and before he can look up, someone had smacked him in the head.

"what the fuck-!!"

"i want to say 'are you okay', but to be honest you kinda deserved that." a mop of ginger can bee seen hanging from someone's head.

"fuck off childe, and why did you smack me?!"

"because you deserve it. but y'know, it's nice having front row seats seeing you ruin your life because of that toungue of yours. aether's right you're an ass." he helped scaramouche from the floor, dusting his uniform from the filth. "ill take you to the infirmary." scaramouche can only nod, feeling lethargic after all that energy spent.

he hopes to see you the next day, acting like nothing ever happened.

part 2

[slurpyboii]

T500 YAYYYYY I LOVE YOU EMU OTORI

All of my free time for the next week is going to be spent tiering in PJSK and on finals idk if I'm gonna survive this

[asterifish]

Love You... // Lee know x male reader

Synopsis: m/n is in love. Hopelessly in love. When he first saw Minho, he was head over heels. M/n couldn't stop thinking about this mysterious dance major, and when they met, they felt as if their lives were complete.

Type: One-Shot

Genre(s): 🍂,❣️(see pinned post for key)

Extra Notes: reminder that 🪐 stands for m/n, and happy reading!!! There's gonna be 1 more fic after this released today :)

Story under the cut!!

"Chan Chan!! Chan wake up!!!"

🪐 was practically jumping on his hyung's bed, a big smile on his face. Jumping up almost immediately, the older male rubbed his eyes "🪐, its so early... Whats wrong?" Chan stifled a yawn as he looked at the younger, confused and worried.

"Channie, I passed the cutest boy when I was on the way to your dorm, I swear to god! He was like... glowing!! Is that even possible? I mean I..." 🪐 started rambling as he tried to describe the male, but his voice cut off as Chan laughed.

Patting 🪐's head, Chan smiled. "You are so in love already, aren't you?" 🪐 dramatically sighed and shook his head, "Are you even listening to me?! I'm describing GOD here!!"

"Okay okay 🪐, how about you actually describe him, yeah?" Chan sighed and slipped out of his bed.

🪐 followed Chan closely, rambling about the mysterious boy again. "So... You know how I have to pass the dance studio to get to your dorm, right? Okay so I was walking and I decided to look into the studio to see if Seungmin was there, but he wasn't. Not the point...."

Chan hummed softly as he listened to 🪐, finding the whole situation funny so far.

"BUT!! as I was turning to leave, I swear to god!! I almost bumped into him OOOHHHHH I was so embarrassed.... Anyway this guy had brown hair, and omg his eyes were so pretty!!! I watched him walk in and I stared for like.. ever it felt like." 🪐 continued, now bouncing on his heels excitedly.

"You swear you've never seen him before this?" Chan was thinking to himself, trying to figure out who the guy could be. 🪐 nodded, "Never seen him anywhere before!"

"Did he have brown eyes?" Chan suddenly asked, his eyes sparking with mischief. 🪐 squinted his eyes, face twisting into a frown "Channie.... are you saying you know him?"

"Maybe, maybe not..." Chan smiled and shook his head. "You'll see 🪐, you'll see."

WHAT????" 🪐 screeched. "WHATS HIS NAME?? PLEASE TELL ME PLEASE PLEASE I GOTTA KNOW" 🪐 was now shaking the older male, wanting an answer immediately.

"All I can tell you is that his name is Minho, alright? You'll see later on." Chan smiled and led 🪐 to the couch.

. . .

"Hey Seungmin? You here?" Minho opened the door to the dance studio carefully, looking around. He had promised the boy that he would help him with the more difficult parts of the dance they were doing for a project, but Seungmin wasn't there.

Slowly starting to warm up, Minho couldn't help but notice that there was a boy standing at the window of the studio, seemingly watching him. Minho didnt really mind at first, since a lot of people liked to peek into the studio every now and then.

As he kept stretching, he noticed that the male never went away. When Seungmin finally came out of the back, Minho turned to him. "Hey Seung? Do you know that guy?" By the time Seungmin looked over, the male was gone.

"What did he look like?" Seungmin asked, tilting his head. As the two walked to the center of the dance studio, Minho described the male he'd seen. "Oh! That was 🪐-hyung! He was probably looking for me." Seungmin smiled and shook his head.

"🪐?" Minho thought out loud. "Yeah! He's really close to Chan so the others and I hang out with him a lot, we should..." Seungmin's voice trailed off as his phone buzzed. "Oh hold on hyung, let me take this."

Minho nodded and then continued warming up, he didnt get very far before he started thinking about the male again. "🪐, huh? I wonder why i haven't seen him before..."

. . .

🪐 was excited for the next day, he was practicslly skipping through the halls on his way in between classes. "Yo, 🪐!! Whats up with you lately?" Chan grabbed 🪐's arm and turned him around. "You've been acting really weird..."

🪐 didn't answer, he just giggled to himself and wiggled excitedly. Chan sighed and shook 🪐 lightly. "Come on, I want to introduce you to someone."

🪐 whined but reluctantly followed behind the older male.

. . .

"Seungmin, where are you taking me?" Minho frowned as the younger male dragged him throughout the campus grounds. He had no idea where they were going, and sighed again.

. . .

It had been a few days since 🪐 had first brought up Minho and Chan and Seungmin had made a plan for for the two to meet. So, the two dragged their friends to the designated meeting spot. When they got there, Seungmin told Minho that he'd be right back and then disappeared. Chan had told 🪐 that Seungmin was meeting him, and had left suddenly as well.

. . .

🪐 had gotten to the park earlier than he'd expected to. He didnt know why Chan would just leave suddenly, but it did give him time to think. 🪐 had been sitting on a bench for a few minuted before 🪐 felt someone standing over him. 🪐 looked up with a confused expression.

"Can I help y...." 🪐's voice trailed off when he noticed that the person was Minho.

. . .

When Minho reached the park, the first thing he did was look around for his friends. He knew that they liked to play pranks on him, so he was on high alert. But instead if seeing his friends, he spotted a familiar face. 'Is that 🪐? Whats he doing here?'

Walking over to the other male, Minho smiled softly when he realized that it really was 🪐. He stood there awkwardly for a few seconds before 🪐 noticed, looking up with a confused expression.

. . .

"Hey, you're 🪐, right?" Minho started, shuffling his feet a bit. 🪐 nodded and smiled, "you're Minho!" Laughing quietly at 🪐's boldness, Minho nodded. Sitting down next to the other male, Minho sighed.

"So.. I guess this was their plan, huh?" Minho said after a while. 🪐 looked over, seeming to think about it. Nodding slowly, 🪐 agreed.

"I..."

"Would you like to..."

The two laughed as they talked over each other, but Minho couldn't help but stare. 🪐 was so much prettier up close. He didn't even realize how close he was until he'd kissed 🪐.

. . .

"SO YOU KISSED HIM???" A voice screeched, causing Minho to jump. It was now a few days later, and he was telling the story to Felix.

"I mean... yeah? It was an accident but I think n/n enjoyed it." Minho shrugged his shoulders and sighed. Just as Felix was about to say something else, there was a knock at the door.

"Can someone answer that? It's just 🪐!!" Seungmin called. Felix wiggled his eyebrows at Minho and pushed him towards the door. Groaning, Minho opened the door, leaning on it.

And there 🪐 was, in all his glory, a bright smile on his face.

"Hi Minho! Is Seungmin there?" 🪐 asked, his head tilted slightly. Looking at the male in front of him, Minho shook his head with a smile. "You're such a Golden Retriever n/n. Come on, he's probably in his room."

A few hours later, 🪐 and Minho were snuggling on the couch. They had been watching a movie, so both were quiet. When Minho looked down at the male in his lap, he smiled. "Sleeping.... God I've really fallen for you Hwang 🪐."

Permanent taglist [2/30]: @foxilsdenn , @succubus-hansol

Works belong to @asterifish | reblogs help me a lot!

2024 | © @asterifish

[ganondoodle]

fuck it, elden ring DLC rant (spoilers) (long post ... oh dear)

so, to start this- this is a very emotional reaction, so take everything with a ton of salT (i need to get this out of my system bc i need to go and do stuff today, i literally couldnt get much more than 3 hours of sleep bc my mind was racing) i only know two screenshots and what others have told me (thank you) so i might be missing more context and havent seen or read it myself

(more details and spoilers for the DLC below the read more thingy)

also, just to explain a bit, i dont usually get this upset about things i like, i like alot of things, but its RARE as fuck that i care, like actually care care about something, and that just kinda happens, i dont choose it or can decide to not care, i just do, and when something like this happens its like ... a sort of grief? i cant help but care about it but it messes with me emotionally, i have no control over it and cant change anything about it when it gets bad or done dirty, leavign me to just have to watch it be real even when i dont want to accept it-- i wouldnt say so much that i 'expect' somethign specific and cant handle when its not like that (common accusation about disliking totk)- and no i dont have somethign specific in mind, i just dont want it to be bad OR things that seem done and closed off suddendly out of nowhere be revealed to 'actually' have been like this, new stuff that either makes no sense or invalidates alot about what i valued about it, what i thought was the point

(i remember two .. my only two other intersts before- see what i mean RARE- that also went down simiarly like this; transformers (bay movies and mainly prime series, listen i didnt choose it either) with each movie it got more messy and stupid, primes second(?) season had an end i hated and the following movie was the final nail in the coffin- and one piece after that, which i slowly fell out of love with bc every chapter seemed to go more into a direction i didnt like, then the reveal that luffy is a god actually was my final ok i hate that moment)

i knew demise for a long time but wasnt obsessed about him at all, it took me learning about how hylia was depicted in a non canon (?) manga (which made me annoyed me bc i didnt like it and made a design for her to counter demises instead) and then reading his few lines of dialog about her again that it suddendly HIT me, like cupids arrow into my head-- i liked but wasnt that super interested into elden ring until radahn showed up, instantly his design made me go owo and then learning his (base game) lore it HIT me (i love sort of tragic side characters that might have been powerful or heroic at some point but now arent anymore- not saying he is that elden rings lore i messy and no ones good tm- and especially so if that character is widely hated for no good reason, dismissed or forgotten, has little lore etc)

i have things i like but dont care this much about, like okami or bloodborne, i like it alot, theres characters i really like (oki) but im not like, fixated on them?- and to have two at the same time, while not equally strong, i dont think i had before, and then have both be damaged or potentially lose it in a similar way within barely a year hurts so damn much--- anyway, getting into the actual rant now lol

so, to sum things up (that i know), in the elden ring DLC later on

miquella is actually a master manipulator and brainwasher (even to his sister???? which means alot of impactful things about his relationship to people is kinda invalidated or made meaningless, shitty)

he wanted to become a god by marrying radahn (his half? brother, same father) of all people that has never been mentioned before until now somehow?? ) you can argue it was hinted to but i find it completely out of left field

miquella sent malenia after radahn to kill him so he could be put into the realm of shadow so miquella could marry him (there were better candidates for that??)- its unclear (to me) if radahn ever actually accepted when sound of mind or even knew about it at all, but failed and he was isntead inflicted with rot to slowly waste away but not die (like he is in base game)

which also means that, what i found really impactful in base game, the festival of radahn, that i thought was a tragic sort of last wish/effort for of radahn to grant him an honorable death as a respected general after being made into mindless people eating zombie, organized by his soldiers/friends- might have been just yet another attempt to kill him and get him over there to miquella (and even if not, it still makes it way less impactful and now i feel like letting him continue to roam as a zombie is more of a favor than killing him bc hes just gonna a puppet again! which turns the whole tradgedy of the stuff in base game on its head imo)

you need to kill him to get into the DLC (and i was even sus of that but shrugged it off when i heard it ..) bc that way miquella could take whatever was left of his soul and stitch it into mohgs corpse?? (which is why hes so small in that DLC fight) bc his body was rotten by that point, which also allowed miquella to control radahn and make him agree, force him to do whatever miq wanted (which ALSO might mean mohg 'kidnapping' miquella wasnt that actually but mohg too was manipulated so oud kill him and make his remains usable)

radahn in DLC is a voiceless meat puppet essentially ... like a mindless rotting zombie eating friends and fow alike wasnt enough- also means that we never ACTUALLY GET OT KNOW RADAHN HIMSELF bc hes eithe a zombie or a literal puppet (if you are gonna do him dirty at least let us meet actual real him *cries*)

his fight is super hard apparently (though i have been hearing people complain about the entire DLC being too hard, while the -casual player- streamer i watched is beating main bosses so fast they dont even get to start their second phase) when his fight in base game, and him by extentsion, was also hated bc of that ALREADY, which means more people are gonna hate his guts (he doesnt deserve that!!) AND most people probably wont get or care that its not actually HIM him so its like a repeat boss that everyone hates

it feels weirldy forced in for it to be radahn (like miquella was already said to be one of the strongest gods out there .. why hed want radahn so badly when his goal seemed to be rather .. combat less?? if you get what i mean, and radahn also rejected him??? and the tarnished is right there too????) bc theres plenty others it would have worked with that are barely used- it feels like someone jsut wanting him to be tha main guy not matter what (when he worked so much better as a side character!!!!)

a tragic but well rounded off side character (imo) was made into the main guy this is all about actually tm (i generally dont like main guys and this jsut feels so .... it just hurts, it didnt feel foreshadowed at all, and its not even truly HIM that is reveal to be a creepy asshat but hes just manipulated and controlled with the whole time, be it by rot or miquella)

and for miquella its like, no theres no even mildly good people there, hes brainwashed and manipulated everyone actually tm, a giant plan all to force his half brother into marrying him by making him into a corpse puppet bc he rejected miquella- inlcuding potentially manipulating his own twin sister, which goes agaisnt what you learn of what hes done for her in the base game i think?? (not that much into that part but yeah ... it feels unfair to her too)

it also kinda just leaves other lore from the base game in the dust? like the whole haligtree plan, how miquella cared for the rejected (i guess he didnt then??? and it was just more manipulation tm??) that castle with the eclipse stuff

(is the gloom eyes queen, marika, and or st trina even .. important at all to any of this??)

ok from reading tweets from people talkign about it, miquella says radahn agreed apparently but whether thats true remains uncertain and given the circumstances i do not think radahn did- others said that it kinda sounds he agreed to something that he didnt think would involve him marrying miquella

everything feels like its in shambles for every fan of every involved chaarcter

yes i know you can argue that it was all planned from the start and meant to be a twist and everything and that people having a different idea of characters isnt the fault of the creators .... only to some degree bc why then build up make so much lore and story about stuff that turns out to be like saying 'actually it was all a lie' like its not valid to feel betrayed then, you can plan things out all you want but that doesnt mean it cant be bad oder underwhelming

(i wished to be able to meet or know more about radahn but like in a non rot way or like past flashback whatever kind of way and then not like this anyway, like i was interested into his relationship with jerren and just .. more about him i suppose the monkey paw has curled hasnt it -or however you say that-)

and there i was like two days ago going "omg radahn mention!!!" when that one .. feyja? NPC says she fought alongside him at some point ............................................................

leonard isnt there in the DLC to my knowledge, you know it cant be truly radahn if his horse isnt there (the sole reason he learned gravitiy magic for and it stayed with him even after the rot!!! i know people have started to hate it bc people love that but i love that, it made him so endearing to me, like a character i already found cool omg has a confirmed softer spot??? in MY fromsoftware title??)

sorry for the long post of rambling, i am a mess, barely slept 3 hours, yes i am weird to care, autisms or whatever .. i need to go somewhere in an hour and havent prepared as all bc i needed my thoughts out of my head- might have forgotten stuff, idk if i will add it later or just kinda .. stew in it for a while

(and yes a big point why i feel so strongly is both bc its just gonna make more people hate him even more AND feels so invalidating of alot of other stuff- pulls other characters down with it- the entire time i was watching the streams i and trailers i thought i was like, its onw thing, with miquellas littel adventure and more background info on marika mostly on its own from the base game BUT NO I GUESS)

(read all this in the sense of an utteraly disoriented confused and drunken seagull yelling around pls i am not in serious mental distress ..)

[gracetoldmeto]

really long rant: why am i so scared of everything?

note: the rest of this post was a draft i made a few days ago, and was going to let rot forever, but today has messed me up so much i just said *why not* and posted bc idk... why not...

im not like 'BOO!!! jumpscare' scared just like... there are so many things in life that could go wrong that are entirely out of your control and theres absolutely nothing you can do about it, ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOTHING, because shit happens and sometimes that shit is BAD and permanently fucks you over for life and thats just the way it is bc fate is a game of chance (this is my dramatic ass way of saying 'a forever change') but everyone says "oh if you cant control it then why worry?"

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?

NO. THAT IS NOT THE POINT. THE POINT IS I DO WORRY.

I could die tomorrow. I could get a terminal diagnosis tomorrow. Someone (else) I love could die (again) tomorrow. Maybe my house could burn down tomorrow. Maybe in some freak accident everything I've ever known is taken from me... somehow?

can i control any of this? no.

so what do i do about it??? anything i can to minimize the fallout just in case...

bc isnt that just called RESPONSIBILITY???

ie: house fire? -> ok. insurance.

medical? -> insurance.

death? (that isnt mine) -> stable income

(note #1: this is about the point in my writing of this post where i dont even have the motivation to finish it bc i just wanna sit down and cry... but i might as well)

so OKAY, guess what? i did something about all those possibilities, so my anxiety should be relieved, right? fear gone! all okay now!

WRONG!

all that structure ive created bc its the "rEsPoNsiBLe" way to live, is a slow painful depressing death of my mental health at the hands of my job

yes, id rather gain an inch than lose a mile, small sufferings over large,

but oh my god is that all life is? small sufferings???

if i keep only suffering one inch at a time im going to end up killing myself and i dont quite think anyone truly GETS that except my therapist

this isnt like high school where i knew jack shit about mental health, i know what help is out there, whether or not it works is a totally different story

(note #2: i have looked at my options, ive read the rules, and id actually rather take my metaphorical little plastic car you get at the start of The Game of LIFE boardgame and throw it out a fucking window)

im past the point of easy help and unfortunately the conclusion i keep coming back to is a quote from a fic i wrote last year...

whatever THIS life is, regardless of how much i worked my ASS off for it, i dont want it anymore

(note #3: i dont even think id be in this spot if i didnt have shit luck)

i am equally fucked by either...

1) being responsible, financially safe, insured, but sad af at my job and actively praying something kills me in my sleep

OR

2) quitting my job with no plan and being scared that fate is gonna fuck me over for the upteenth time and this time i wont be able to bounce back or (lets be real) even have a want to (but thats a discussion for another time)

this is no way to fucking live, yet here i am

why am i scared of everything? well, yes i know WHY (bc from personal experience i know what can go wrong)

why am i scared of everything? because you cant be scared of something if you dont know it exists BUT in order to be prepared and responsible it means you have to acknowledge that YES IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU

so how the hell am i supposed to be responsible when i hate what comes with it???

"hey alex, what do you wanna be when you grow up? (1) sad or (2) scared?"

actually neither, id rather simply not exist

why am i scared of everything? because how else am i supposed to act?

why am i scared of everything? because actually, there is no answer to this... there is no reason... its just another shit thing in life that iunno how to deal with

why am i scared of everything? because the universe said so and so thats how it is

and i fucking hate it

.

...ok thats all im gonna go make a quesadilla now