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elleloquently · 2 years ago

Text

invisible string [3] : ellie williams

part two

| college!ellie - wow i am so glad that people are enjoying this oh my gosh!! to be completely honest i didn't really plan how long/short i want this series to be, or how many parts it's going to be so i guess we'll see?? but it is 4am and i could not stop writing but i finished and now i am going to sleep! head in hands i have feelings for her your honor i will probably have to re edit this in the morning elleloquently go to sleep challenge

| c/w - reader is anxious, general swearing for every part because it's ellie

on friday evening, sometime after the study session, you had drafted a text to send to ellie.

hey! thanks for studying today, I re|

hey! i really had fun wi|

hey ellie,|

when saturday came around, you figured you had already waited too long and missed your chance to text her. it should've been a few hours after you departed, close enough that it was relevant to thank her for her time yet not too close to seem overbearing.

sunday afternoon you were frustrated with your inability to make up your mind. you had yet to even save her number into your phone, and it was certainly too late to make a move now.

you were spiraling. completely overthinking every action and word, worried that any sort of relationship or interaction you potentially could've had with ellie had already slipped through your fingers.

turning over in bed, you stared at the green sticky note on your wall. you had put it there on friday, careful not to crease or fold any corner of the paper as you carefully pressed it to the wall. her handwriting on display on your wall, you lost minutes just gazing at it.

Ellie!!!!!

by monday morning you were a wreck, nearly contemplating skipping class. you felt rude, not texting ellie when she offered up her phone number in the first place.

she clearly wouldn't have given you her phone number if she didn't want you to actually use it, and you spent your early hours cursing yourself while getting ready for not coming to that realization sooner.

the walk to class felt like a death march. accompanied by gray skies and frost covered grass, you hoped being early to class would give you some time to speak to ellie before it started. luckily you had gotten used to getting there early, and ellie hadn't beaten you there first this time.

it felt like a waiting game, twirling a pencil between your fingers and snapping your head up every time someone new entered the classroom. with only minutes until the lecture was going to begin, a few desks remained open, including the one next to you where ellie previously sat the last time you had class.

letting go of any hope that you would be able to talk before class started, you flipped through your notes in an attempt to refocus your thinking. while scanning your previously highlighted words, the sight of a familiar bag and converse caught your eye.

you immediately looked up, smiling, hoping to catch ellie's eye just as she had caught yours. the desk next to you was still available, but it remained open as ellie walked past and returned to her original seat a few aisles away.

with a sinking heart and trembling hands, your smile faded. you screwed up. you knew you screwed up, why were you such an idiot? why couldn't you have just texted her?

it was torture, having such a brief taste of what it was like to make ellie laugh, only to go back to not existing in her orbit.

it was your own fault, that's what made it worse.

taking notes and reviewing lecture slides was a tedious task that you didn't have the capacity for, not when ellie was right there and she was all that you could think about.

if this is how you were after merely one study session, you were certain to be doomed. although, maybe the one study session was all you were destined to have.

your own writing utensil was untouched, abandoned on your desk as your gaze lingered on ellie. you watched as she furiously took notes, thinking back to her handwriting posted back on your wall.

time moves slower in a classroom. what feels like hours are only mere seconds according to the clock hands, taunting and teasing your restless tendencies at every given moment.

ellie doesn't look over to meet your gaze, not even once. you can easily count the number of days left in the semester, and winter break was going to come no matter how badly you wanted to talk to the pretty girl in your social psych class. with the changing of the semester, there were no promises that you would ever even see ellie on campus again, let alone share a class with her.

eventually the clock decided to agree with your concept of time, and you were determined to catch ellie while everyone was packing up. you rushed to shove things in your bag, not caring if anything was crumpled or put back perfectly into its secure place. you kept your eyes on ellie, and abruptly stood up when she stepped past your desk so you could walk out of the doorway together.

"hey," you chirped, careful not to bump ellie's shoulder as you shrugged your bag higher onto your own.

"hey," ellie replied, meeting your eyes for the first time that day.

your cheeks burned but ellie looked troubled and then indifferent, your confidence to apologize for the lack of text messages rapidly decreasing by the second.

nearing the building exit, your heart quickened with every second and your mouth began moving before your brain could process what was being said.

"hey, so, thanks for the other day. it made the studying fun," you admitted, eyeing ellie cautiously as you didn't want to overstep so soon.

ellie stopped short and turned to face you, gripping onto the straps of her bag that were loosely around her shoulders. her eyebrows furrowed as she stayed silent, but relief soon washed over your body at the words that left her lips.

"it was fun, wasn't it?" cracking a smile, ellie blew out a deep breath and shook her head. "helpful, too."

short, auburn strands released themselves from her bun, joining the loose hair that collected around her shoulders. with a newfound confidence from her reply, you pressed on.

"i wanted to text you, but, uh, i wasn't sure..." you trailed off, hard to latch onto any clear thought with her eyes meeting yours. you broke eye contact, glancing down at your shoes when you heard ellie snort.

"you weren't sure if i wanted you to?" ellie questioned. her tone was quiet and serious which made your face lift to meet her eyes once again. she was smiling, so you nodded.

"yeah," you confirmed. "it's...it's dumb."

scanning your face, ellie heaved out another sigh.

"don't you think if i give you my phone number, it's because i want you to use my phone number?" ellie raised her eyebrows, the amusement and curiosity patent on her features.

as small groups continued down the hall, you moved out of the way by sliding closer to the wall.

"fair point," you mumbled, the feeling of embarrassment creeping back up on you.

just as you were starting to doubt yourself, ellie jumped back in to save you.

"hey, when's your next class?" she asked suddenly.

eyes widening, you quickly forced your phone out of your pocket to check the time.

in an hour.

"actually, i'm all done for the day!" you lied, plastering a smile onto your face.

ellie hummed, content.

"wanna take our notes and see if we can manage to find something edible at the dining hall?" ellie proposed, tilting her head and raising her eyebrows.

yes.

"sure," you agreed, brushing hair out of your face. a nervous habit.

the tell might've been easy, but ellie wasn't fazed.

"alright," she wound up, holding her arm out to gesture you to lead the way.

the way ellie fell in step with you made you smile, and your cheeks burned so much you could've been mistaken for having a fever.

the dining hall in question wasn't far, but you secretly hoped for a longer paced walk so you could sneak glances at the green eyed girl walking next to you.

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walking with ellie on campus felt natural and comfortable. she was easy to talk to, thank god, and you could almost ignore the anxious pounding in your chest.

you looked down at your shoes a lot while you talked, or straight ahead at your pathing, missing the occasional glance from ellie.

looking at you sideways and smiling, her eyes refocused elsewhere when you raised your head.

while ellie spoke, and you weren't worried about what to do with your body or your hands or your facial expressions, you would allow yourself to get comfortable for a moment, focusing on the warmth of her voice.

though you felt nervous about the pressure of sitting with her again, less things to be distracted by, even navigating the dining hall felt not as mundane at ellie's side.

you walked together, doing a loop around the hall when nothing looked particularly appetizing, deciding to plate up with snacks to share instead. safe foods that couldn't be botched took up the space, like fries, loose veggies from a salad bar, and little pickings from a dessert table.

you got settled at a round table, food on one side and school stuff on the other. it was intimidating to be sitting across from ellie, and you felt like you didn't know where to look.

it was strange, how it felt so easy yet so hard at the same time.

feeling like you owed it after the texting situation, your brain nagged at you to start up a conversation first. you swiped through the pockets of your bag until your fingers landed on a pen.

"so... do you... need help with notes today?"

"hm?" ellie made a sound, half distracted, before her eyes grew in realization. "oh! notes. nah, i'm all good."

you nodded, keeping a firm grip on your pen just to give your hand something to do.

"thanks though," elle quickly added, genuine but quiet.

you nodded once more, lost for words but desperately clawing at your brain to try to come up with something natural. to fill the silence you tried something from the plate of food just as ellie began to speak once more.

"what are you gonna do after college?" she quipped.

"next question," you immediately denied, earning a short laugh from ellie.

"fair enough." the corners of her mouth turned upwards and you quickly mirrored ellie's expression, not able to help it.

"what do you like to do? outside of notes and studying, obviously," you asked, studying her curiously.

your heart ached to get to know her, to genuinely know her, and after sneaking glances at her during class throughout the semester, it felt nearly surreal to be engaging in a conversation with her now.

it was somehow simultaneously nothing you could've expected, and yet everything you would've hoped for.

ellie sighed, content, but you could've sworn she almost sounded shy as she answered your question.

"play guitar," she shrugged, as if she were trying to brush it off as a passing comment instead of a point in conversation.

"no shit? that's so cool," you gushed, genuinely impressed. in response, ellie's cheeks turned pink and she quickly looked down, picking at the food. in a matter of seconds she seemed relaxed instead of tense, the color leaving her cheeks as quickly as it appeared.

"i like it," ellie gave in with a sigh. "do you play?"

you shook your head in disappointment. "i wish," you responded wistfully.

"i could show you sometime," ellie offered.

the idea alone made your head spin, and you glanced down at where her hands were resting on the table. she had calluses on her fingers, and your eyes trailed from her fingertips to her tattoo. ellie pretended not to notice, and reached over to your side of the table. you froze momentarily but she grabbed your pad of sticky notes, blue, and set them down in front of her.

"i would be... a horrible student," you laughed, shaking your head at the idea.

"come on," ellie teased, wrinkling her nose as she stole your pen.

"i would love to learn," you enthused, trying not to focus on how quickly your heart was beating. "i just don't know how much you would like me by the time the lesson was over."

"yeah, alright," ellie mused, rolling her eyes with a grin.

every time she smiled you felt like you had accomplished something, and it made you wanting to chase that reaction even more.

study materials were ignored, placed on the table as a buffer that was quickly unnecessary and unneeded. the conversation felt effortless and you were on a high. you complimented ellie's tattoo to which she complimented your name, rolling it off of her tongue and you wished desperately to live inside of that moment.

"i like it," she said earnestly.

every bold statement was countered with a falter, a slip of the mask or a sheepish smile, but always quickly recovered.

you talked about your major and why you chose it, the reasoning sounding a lot like a very complicated guessing game, and ellie hummed along to show that she was listening while she got busy doodling something with your stolen pen.

after a moment she ripped the piece with the drawing away from the rest of the pad, proudly placing it in front of you.

on the blue paper was a drawing of a little dinosaur wearing a tiny hat.

"it's a hatosaur," ellie informed you, grinning at her own creation.

"i love it." you gave it a good look before you returned it back to ellie. the smile fell from her face and you were quick to explain yourself.

"you have to sign it," you pressed, and ellie laughed in agreement.

once the cursive letters of her name were under the drawing, it was back in your possession. you reached out for the post-its and ellie quickly handed them over, along with your pen. you smiled graciously and then placed your arm around the paper as a barrier.

"don't look," you warned ellie, which resulted in her stretching her neck to get a better look. you looked up at her, bewildered, trying your best to suppress your laughter as she sunk back deep into her seat.

"man, i would totally skip my next class if i could," ellie mumbled wistfully.

you finished your doodle, signed your name in tiny letters at the bottom, and removed the note from the stack so you could present it to ellie.

"ta-da, baby snoopy," you remarked.

"oh man," ellie breathed, looking at you quickly and then back to the doodle. "look at that little guy!"

"should've been an art major," you clicked your tongue, pretending to be disappointed in yourself.

"our talents are being wasted away," ellie agreed, picking up the picture you had made and holding it in front of herself. "i'm keeping this," she informed you.

"okay," you easily agreed. "i'm keeping your... hatosaur."

ellie stretched her arm out to you, her hand dangling by your face. you panicked before you realized what was intended and quickly saved yourself, shaking ellie's hand as a deal.

dropping her grin, ellie focused in on you earnestly.

"i don't want to go to class," she confided.

"i'm so very sorry," you copied her expression and ellie tapped her hands on the table.

"shit," she muttered begrudgingly. "i better go."

you nodded in understanding, slipping the drawing that ellie had made carefully into your pocket.

"really good studying today," you joked.

ellie smirked and rolled her eyes, and your heart soared. standing and clearing the table with final words of "see you in class," you headed off in one direction while ellie left in the other.

during your walk you didn't even notice the cold, or the fact that the comings of winter meant that the sun threatened to set much earlier in the evening. ellie's drawing in your pocket kept you company.

as soon as you arrived in your room, you carefully placed it on the wall next to the previous note. ellie was now on your wall two times, which didn't even begin to represent how often she was on your mind.

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you waited exactly thirty five minutes until you entered ellie's phone number into your phone. this time, constructing a message came naturally to you.

hey! i had fun today. i hope your class goes well!

the thought still gave you butterflies, so you launched your phone across your bed as soon as your finger hit send. immediately after you winced and lunged for your phone, quickly sending another text clarifying who you were.

your phone vibrated shortly after, and the sight of ellie's name of your screen was a welcomed one. her response made your breath catch in your throat:

Uh, how'd you get my number...?

her second text came quickly after and you sighed in relief, trying to contain all of the emotions that were threatening to burst out of you at any given moment.

Kidding. It was fun, seriously. If only I didn't have class, ughhh...

you lock your phone and then unlock it again right away, staring at her words. words she typed out and sent to you, and you suddenly felt like the luckiest person in the world.

[ part four ]

#there’s a little wink to the game in this one #her corny dinosaur joke LMAO i had to include it #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams college au #ellie tlou x reader #tlou x reader

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system-of-a-feather · 7 months ago

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Re-establishing Baseline Plan

Since moving, I've (completely understandably and expectedly) had my baseline kinda fucked (did not help by with financial stress + job incompatibility + ear infection + really bad post ear infection cold + probable norovirus in literally one month) and so I've been really overloaded, stressed, and just in a place of mostly survival mode where most of my energy is focused on maintaining my mental and physical state in the easiest manners possible

I have been holding up well all things considered and have set up for a probably more compatible job + my fiance has managed to get a job again that he feels will probably work out well for him and I have at least like a week off between jobs to reorientate myself

So to take a good and active effort to make the best of this time, I want to make a plan to set myself up for success. I actually do this every so often when I really need to pick myself up (historically Lucille would usually do it but pros of being basically fully integrated is that I am Lucille as well as me) and I figured it would be a neat thing to display and demonstrate here cause I'd end up making it *anyways* so why not share with the class

If anyone likes this, yall can borrow it ^^

-----

Question One: What current coping skills and hobbies am I currently doing and trying with my time? Are they affective and would I like to change them?

Art, Drawing, Character Design, Art Fight Prep, Story Planning and Writing

This is one of the easiest and most reliable positive coping mechanisms and has gotten me through the majority of the month mostly on it's own. Compared to other coping mechanisms, this one is almost always something I can drag myself to do or at least ask someone to supervise me to make sure I do it when I feel I need some sort of self care. It serves greatly as an alternative when I find that I am doing maladaptive coping that I would rather not do and when in doubt, it has access to some level of social engagement should I feel I need that. With that being said, having relied largely on this for a month, this is suffering diminishing returns and starting to lead to general lack of inspiration and so diversification from this coping mechanism would be ideal

Weekend Gym Trips

This is actually a really good way for me to release energy, give myself space and time to think, and just feel better moving and existing in my body. It also mandates time for me to listen to music and serves a meditative purpose. That said, I have only been doing this on Saturdays and only once on Sunday and I would like to expand that to be at least 3 times a week or at least more spaced out.

Reading Semi Regularly

This is a new habit and coping I picked up and its actually really good! It provides a unique sense of calm when I need it. Unfortunately I've started to drop off the past week due to general stress and illness, so I think its important to return to this. Perhaps set a general goal of "every other day" rather than every day to lessen the pressure.

Video Games

This was helpful but lately I have been not motivated to play anything and I believe its been burnt out. I think it would be good to resume this but it is currently impractical to force at the moment until overall wellness has returned.

TV with Boy

This is helpful but unforunately nothing seems to interest either of us to watch right now. (cri life is hard /lh)

Board Games with Boy

This is a new one and has actually been very nice. That said, it isn't always available and dependent on my fiance's ability to have the energy, time and interest to play them, particularly since I know he is less interested in board games than me. It is good to maintain the interest and offer, but not a coping skill to become reliant on.

Question Two: What sorts of things that I am currently not doing do I know tend to define behaviors, habits, hobbies, and interests that are done when I am out of survival mode and genuinely enjoying life?

Regular Birding, Particularly with Peers

Interest in watching anything on my own, youtube, TV shows, etc

Engagement in Music, Particularly my Musical Instruments

Engagement in Exploration and just independent travels without individuals

Engagement and interest in occasionally reaching out to Buddhist environments

Producing art work for the story that is more developed and inspired rather than "quick" or "reference" focused - actually focusing on the creative and artistic expression rather than the practical expression

Increased social circle communication irl beyond my online bestie, fiance, and online friend group chat; reaching out to individuals and developing new irl friendships

Question Three: Which of those hobbies do I think could be the most reasonable and easy to meet sooner than later (even better if I can make steps to start that right now / today)? In what ways could I make steps to make those first changes and help set myself up for success on expanding my engagement with life beyond survival mode?

Interest in watching anything on my own, youtube, TV shows, etc

While I am not extensively motivated in any manner to watch anything in particular, I am starting to randomly get a lot of bleach related stuff on my youtube and I have been meaning to watch TYBW arc. I have been postponing it because of arbitrary "I wanna read the manga first" and just general other excuses, but realistically those are putting up barriers that I may not get to at this rate and currently I could just use something I'm somewhat interested in to give me some independent relaxing engagement. I think I can set the goal of actually watching Bleach TYBW at least an episode a day starting either today or tomorrow and see if that can bring a momentum and habit into actually being able to watch things that interest me on my own.

Engagement in Music, Particularly my Musical Instruments

I can probably actually take my violin back out. The guitar would probably be better but for whatever reason I feel that my brain thinks that would require more - for a lack of better word - work, so I think I can at least try to find time this week to at least play a little bit of my violin.

Regular Birding, Particularly with Peers + "increased social irl connection [...]"

I can reach out and text my new irl birding connections to see if they are interested; if not I can at least plan to take a birding trip later

Engagement in Buddhist Stuff

I know there is an area I've been thinking of visiting that has free english services on Tuesday, I can make plans to go there that day, particularly since my Fiance should be working for the first day then anyways.

Question Four: What are additional goals and check points that we would like to try to bring us closer to the life style that we know tends to support a thriving mental state and life satisfaction rather than one of survival?

Independent Travels

During the time I have, I can keep in mind this goal and if I have down time think of potentially interesting and alternative places to go to explore; additionally I can plan birding trips to places I have not yet checked out.

Increased Social IRL Connection

It is dependent on if my now-ex-coworker still is interested, but I can follow up and see if we want to still play board games; if not I think potential more ways to reach out will be more viable to plan once a higher level of baseline is established; potentially see if there are any in person DnD groups around that I could make a habit of going to or any martial art dojos that we can afford

More Inspired Art

I think this is something that will come with time between lessening the burn out of my current art-as-a-coping mechanism goal as well as actually engaging in more media and independent interests as to gain more inspiration.

Question Five: Summarize the Key Points and Plans Discussed in This into a Bullet Points of Take Aways

Modifying Current Coping:

Diversify and lean off of using art as a main coping mechanism; give that one a break

Attempt to go to the gym more frequently or at least space it out more throughout the week

Continue reading; lessen the ideal to every other day in case demand pressure is adversely affecting it

Keep an open interest in playing board games with fiance

Changes I Want To Make Soon:

Start watching Bleach TYBW w/ at least one episode a day

Bring out my violin and try to at least play with it for one hour this week

Reach out to new bird peers to see if they want to plan a birding trip sometime, if not then plan one independently

Make plans to go to that place on Tuesday for the open Buddhist service

Changes to Keep an Eye Out For:

Opportunities to go somewhere new randomly for no particular reason or goal in mind other than to just see whats around us

Spoons and time availability to see out places to expand our irl social circles

Inspiration for art in general

Question Six: Set for Regular Follow Ups to Check Progress

Isn't tumblr's queue / schedule function super neat for this

#alter: riku #alter: fei #trauma recovery #coping #coping skills #mental health #mental health resources #survival mode #reestablishing baseline #re-establishing baseline

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the-way-astray · 1 month ago

Note

Stria was walking through town, enjoying her very-ordinary Saturday.

That was, until somebody ran into her.

Stria was sent sprawling to the ground, muttering some colourful curses.

She glanced up and immediately apologized. She didn't want to take any chances on this person thinking she was rude or something similar. "Sorry, sorry, didn't see you there."

Standing there was a guy that had blond hair and ice blue eyes. He had a cocky grin plastered onto his face and he was leaning against a streetlamp, watching her curiously.

He didn't even offer her help- that was rude.

Stria scowled and stood up, brushing dust off her white top.

Great, it was stained.

She glared at the blond guy in front of her.

The guy stared back.

There was an awkward silence in between the two for a few moments, during which Stria was tempted to snap at this guy.

But, hey, maybe he was mute or something.

...Yeah, no.

After a few moments, the guy spoke and Stria did not like his voice.

"You're clumsy," He said, still smirking. "Why weren't you looking where you were going?"

Stria scoffed. "I was minding my own business! You ran into me."

The guy shrugged, looking her up and down. "You weren't looking in front of you, anyways. Your fault as well as mine."

Stria found herself scowling again. "Whatever," She muttered, striding past the guy confidently.

Or at least what seemed like confidently.

Because she was not pouting about this. It wasn't her fault that guy was a jerk and hadn't been looking where he was going.

Stria's Saturday had been ruined, so she aimed for a better Sunday.

She had just bought a caramel tart from the local bakery, and she was sitting at a bench at the park.

A breeze whispered against her face softly, a soothing presence.

Stria was just relaxing as somebody plopped down next to her on the bench.

"Fancy seeing you here, Miss Scowls-A-Lot!"

That was a very familiar, annoying voice.

Stria turned to face the guy, scoffing. "You know, something exists called a name."

The guy shrugged. "I know, Stria."

For several moments, Stria was silent. "...How do you know my name? You...aren't a creepy stalker or anything, are you?"

The guy laughed. "Your name's on your badge thingy. What's with all the colours, anyways?"

Stria looked down to see what the guy was looking at, which turned out to be her pride pin.

"It's a pride pin, duh," She rolled her eyes. Had this guy lived under a rock his whole life?

"Pride..?" The guy blinked, then shrugged. "Well, anyways... you're the only person in town that seems nice. I need your help."

Stria stared at him for a full thirty beats before scoffing. "Me? Nice? Yeah, no, you've got the wrong person, buddy."

The guy tried to protest. "Oh, come on-"

"You have thirty seconds to walk away, or I'm going to punch you," Stria warned.

The blond guy obviously didn't believe her.

So Stria did what any normal person would do. She punched him, square-on in the nose.

The guy staggered back with a gasp. "Oh, stars, a girl hit me! Oh, the offence!"

Stria rolled her eyes. This guy was an overdramatic jerk. She did not like overdramatic jerks.

The guy looked Stria up and down. "So? Will you help me?"

"Was that punch to the face not an answer enough for you?"

"...Yes or no?"

"You're stupid."

"Am I? Didn't see over my general amazingness."

Stria barely knew this guy and she already hated him.

"What's your name?" She demanded. "You know mine, it's only fair."

The guy paused for a moment. "You haven't answered my question."

"Tell me your name and I'll consider it."

"Keefe."

Stria blinked. "...Keefe? That is such a weird name!"

"Not as weird as yours," Keefe chuckled. "Now, time to help me. I need somewhere to stay the night."

Stria paused. "You're suggesting that I take you home to my house to give you, a stranger, a place to sleep at night. In a town that had at least four motels."

Keefe didn't move for a moment before nodding. "Yep. I don't have any money,"

Stria raised an eyebrow and she loathed herself for the pang of sympathy when she heard that.

"Fine. But only one night.

"We can walk back to my house from here. Don't talk to me, and we have no problems, got it?" Stria said firmly. She wasn't in the mood to deal with annoying boys.

"What's your house like? Is it big? Small? Do you have a backyard? Any pets?" Keefe ignored her warning.

Stria decided to pretend she couldn't hear Keefe, but the guy kept pestering her.

"Do you live with your parents? You look young. Are you young?"

Ignoring him again.

"Stria, are you ignoring me? That's mean!"

By the time the pair were five minutes into their walk, Stria snapped.

"Oh, will you shut up for one moment!? I don't need to know every single thing that happens in your god damn useless brain!"

Keefe shrugged. "Oh well. Suck it up." The guy's tone was more teasing than cruel, but Stria still scowled.

"Whatever. Ten minutes of walking left. Please don't try to cause any more trouble."

From what Stria had seen from Keefe so far, though, that was unlikely.

Eventually Stria and Keefe did reach the place Stria was glad to call her house.

It was silent throughout the house as Stria led Keefe past the kitchen and living room.

That was, silent except for Keefe's frustrating chattering.

Was it legal to stab somebody?

Stria showed Keefe into the guest room.

"You will stay here," She said. "I'm telling my parents you're my friend. Don't mess it up."

She stalked away, leaving Keefe behind in the guest room to text her dad.

Breakfast was awkward.

Stria's parents had been surprised to find out she had a 'friend', and they kept making conversation with Keefe.

"How'd you guys meet?" Stria's dad asked cheerfully.

"Being the clumsy idiot she is," Keefe began, much to Stria's dislike. "She tripped over a root down at the park. Naturally, I was there to save the day and prevent poor Stria from taking an ever-so-nasty fall."

Stria was somehow hating this Keefe guy more by the second. Especially when her parents laughed.

Eventually, the meal was over and Stria washed the dishes off before stacking them in the sink. Keefe was waiting for her once she finished, a partly serious look on his face.

"Listen, I didn't come to you just because I needed a place to stay. There's...something else," He sighed. "I need you to come with me, Stria."

Stria scoffed. "There is no way I'm going anywhere with you. You got somewhere to stay for the night, now clear out!"

Keefe met her annoyed gaze with a half-sympathetic, half-grinning look of his own.

"Then I'm sorry, Stria."

"Sorry for what?" Stria frowned as she watched Keefe pull out a small disk. "What is-"

The disk was suddenly tossed to the floor in front of Stria and the sweet smell of candy-flavoured gas filled her nostrils before she swayed and blacked out.

lemme know if you want a part two :D

(give this a name please lol)

calling this pride pin. because i lack creativity. this is what i consider to be the second fix-it fic of @alaydabug2's atrocity.

notes:

"She glanced up and immediately apologized. She didn't want to take any chances on this person thinking she was rude or something similar. "Sorry, sorry, didn't see you there."" accurate to me unfortunately.

"Standing there was a guy that had blond hair and ice blue eyes. He had a cocky grin plastered onto his face and he was leaning against a streetlamp, watching her curiously." I CAN'T HEX CODE PEOPLE'S EYES I WOULD LITERALLY JUST NOTICE THEY'RE BLUE. and also i don't have a habit of looking above someone's waist. especially if i'm on the ground. so i would barely even notice he's blond.

"He didn't even offer her help- that was rude." would not register as rude to me. i'm not a fan of touching strangers, either.

"There was an awkward silence in between the two for a few moments, during which Stria was tempted to snap at this guy." not what i'd be doing. i'd be sheepishly trying to get away from this stranger and on with my life.

"Stria found herself scowling again. "Whatever," She muttered, striding past the guy confidently." accurate.

"Stria's Saturday had been ruined, so she aimed for a better Sunday." by a random stranger who i'll never see again knocking me down????

""Fancy seeing you here, Miss Scowls-A-Lot!"" *sighs* fucking keefe.

"Stria looked down to see what the guy was looking at, which turned out to be her pride pin." THIS IS GOOFY AS ALL HELL. why would i put my name on it???? and i'm too self-conscious to do that that's so funny.

"So Stria did what any normal person would do. She punched him, square-on in the nose." i would not punch keefe because i want to maintain my moral superiority over him, and hitting him would diminish that. also i don't punch strangers, even if i hate them. also i'm a bad puncher. i'd end up hurting myself more than the other person.

""Am I? Didn't see over my general amazingness."" killing and maiming :)

""Not as weird as yours," Keefe chuckled. "Now, time to help me. I need somewhere to stay the night."" yeah, that's fair. stria means stretch marks and also groove and also clumps of stuff in the brain. weird word.

"Stria raised an eyebrow and she loathed herself for the pang of sympathy when she heard that." sigh i hate feeling guilt-tripped.

""Oh, will you shut up for one moment!? I don't need to know every single thing that happens in your god damn useless brain!"" if only he would do this in canon.

"She stalked away, leaving Keefe behind in the guest room to text her dad." i seem to be about fifteen in this fic. interesting. do i give off fifteen-year-old vibes? and i think my parents might've literally ground me into powder and dusted the floor with me if i'd done this.

"Breakfast was awkward." yeah.

"Stria was somehow hating this Keefe guy more by the second. Especially when her parents laughed." my parents would unfortunately laugh at that. sigh.

"The disk was suddenly tossed to the floor in front of Stria and the sweet smell of candy-flavoured gas filled her nostrils before she swayed and blacked out." HE FUCKING DRUGGED ME???? EXCUSE ME???? and i'm supposed to like him after this????

anon. anon yes i want a part two. why did keefe drug me after having known me for like zero point two seconds???? hello????

this is a solid 4/10. good job anon.

#not tagging this cringy because. on second thought it isn't THAT bad i mean it IS still a strieefe fic however #pride pin #asks #anon #keefe would not like me and i don't like him #kotlc #kotlc keefe #keefe sencen

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lonelycowgirls · 2 years ago

Text

Been There All Along

Hellooooo.

She's here and she's beautiful. Harry and Stella are complex characters because humans generally tend to be. So, keep that in mind when reading. I left my desk last night and found it hard to accept that these two people don't actually exist. Ya girl's a little too ✨invested✨ in her made-up people.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy reading this. She's a long one, so get a nice hot drink and settle in.

Please like, reblog and follow if you enjoy it!

My asks are also open for feedback and ideas to how this universe can continue.

I give you... Part 2.

Nel xo

Where Harry goes on a lovely Sunday stroll with an old friend and things get reminiscent.

Read Part One here.

Warnings: angst | swearing | mentions of blood

Word count: 4.1k

Harry took a deep breath in as his eyes adjusted to the bright sunlight outside his London home. Through the busy Saturday traffic he could just about hear the birds chirping. He loved days like that, where the sky was wall-to-wall blue, where the air was chilly but comfortable if you warmed up and chased the sun's rays. He pulled the front door shut and trotted down the three steps that led to the pavement below. The terraced South Kensington abode he shared with Stella was stifling him. So, when Ellis texted to say she was in town for work, he'd jumped at her offer of a cup of coffee and a stroll.

He'd left Stella and the cats catching up on the previous night's episode of Love Island. She was due for an evening shift that night so she just wanted to chill after making a Sunday roast for the two of them. They'd had a long few nights talking things through and making up for lost time. There was rather a lot that they needed to think about and a lot of things they both needed to consider, they'd realised.

He pulled his sunglasses down from where they'd been rested atop his head and set off in the direction of the tube station. He kept his black scarf wrapped over his mouth and chin, for warmth and in the hopes of harbouring some anonymity for as long as possible. He could usually get away with it - it had been over a decade and both he and Stella had gotten very good at sneaking around so as not to be noticed, but it was always a challenge.

Walking along the pavement, he noticed the woman in front of him and marvelled at her wonderful shoe choice. Knee-high boots of dark green snakeskin. She looked great in her dark brown suede coat with its marabou feather trim. Of course, he couldn't just stop and tell her that he liked her outfit, but in that moment he really wished he could. He took a step off the pavement edge and overtook her, turning his head to nod in acknowledgement, being sure not to linger too long.

As he approached the station he began to get slightly anxious as he saw the large crowds funnelling in and out of the station. He questioned why he'd recommended that he and Ellis should meet there a little over half an hour before. He kept his head down and adjusted his tote over his shoulder.

"Hey, stranger." He heard Ellis before she squeezed his arm through his big puffer jacket. She said it close to him and pulled him into a hug quickly. She knew to be discreet so as not to draw any unnecessary attention. He bent slightly to bring her close for a quick squish before letting go with a smile.

"So good to see you, mate," he responded. "Love the hat." He said, tugging the green woollen brim of it over her eyes in jest. She laughed and stepped back to start walking.

"Thanks, dickhead," She replied. "Come on then, show me where you get your pretentious non-fat, no-foam, sugar-free latte's, Mr Hollywood."

"Oh, God you sound like Stella." He grumbled, still with a smirk as he led the way to Florence's Patisserie. They did the best lemon shortbreads, he made a mental note to remember to grab one for Stella.

"I'm only pulling your leg. We have much to discuss though." She looked at him with a knowing, mischievous glint in her eye. Ellis was always the 'wise' one of their friendship group. Always the one to oversee drama and try to distil it. She and Stella had always gotten along, since school, but she'd always been closer to Harry.

It was only a five-minute walk from the station to the café and Harry was glad of it as he'd started hearing whispers from the pedestrians flocking the streets.

"It never gets any less weird, does it." Ellis said rhetorically, as she glanced at a group of girls with their camera phones pointed at the pair. Harry gave her a tight-lipped smile. It definitely didn't bother him as much as it used to. It only really became a burden to him when his friends began to feel uncomfortable being around him. It terrified him to think that he could have lost crucial friendships in the past because of it. People that could have been a big part of his life had he not been famous. It made him that much more thankful for his blonde friend of over a decade, and the feeling warmed his belly.

The familiar pretty millennial pink writing quickly became visible in the distance and Harry sped up, seeing the end in sight. He held open the door for Ellis to step through and followed her, asking what she fancied.

"They do every alternative milk you could think of, if that's something you're into now?" Ellis gave him a look.

"Just good old cows milk will do for me, lad." He nodded and stepped up to order.

"Can I have a triple shot flat white, please? And a," he motioned for Ellis to order.

"Just a regular vanilla latte, please," She said, smiling. "Oh, and one of your delicious-looking pan-au-chocolat's as well, please." She thanked Harry for paying and they moved to the end of the counter to wait. Harry asked her about what she was doing for work in London while adding a sugar sachet to his coffee. They were halfway up the road when Harry stopped.

"Shit, I forgot about Stella."

"What?"

"I forgot to get her anything," Ellis clutched her paper cup for warmth. "Wait here for a sec." He rushed back in the direction of the shop but slowed when he heard a camera shutter. He looked to the side and spotted a paparazzo getting out of a car with a huge camera hanging around his neck. He inhaled sharply, nostrils flaring and turning back to hurry to pull Ellis across the road.

"Never-fucking-mind."

"Bloody hell, Harry how do you keep living like this?"

"Right, so tell me the story. I've heard parts of it from Stell, but I always like to get both sides." Harry sighed and took a sip from his coffee.

"What's Stell's side?" He side-eyed Ellis through his sunglasses, genuinely curious. Ellis side-eyed him right back.

"I'm sure what she's told me is what she's told you," they continued on towards the Heath and Harry swung the rickety old wooden gate open for Ellis to walk ahead. He took another sip of coffee and looked in front of him at the expanse of grassy hills, their destination; a rusting metal bench that sat at the peak. "She feels guilty about the way she handled the situation, but she doesn't regret it." She paused for a moment in thought, he marched by her side, beginning to see his breath exhale into the air as he panted. "She just wants you to be a bit more present, I think."

Harry thought back to their confrontation at MSG.

“You’d know all about it if you listened to anyone talk about anything that wasn’t to do with you.”

Stella always knew the buttons needed to push Harry to another level. It really hurt him to hear her say that. He'd always felt like he made an effort to listen to others - above all, to listen to her. But it definitely made him think twice about the way he'd been treating the people he cared about the most.

"Yeah, we spoke a lot about that. I'm trying, El."

"I wanna say I know you are, but to be completely honest, I don't know if you are or aren't... because we don't really speak much anymore do we?" Harry sighed and rolled his eyes, did all the women in his life recently come together in a meeting and decide it was time to give him a hard time? "Don't stress, I'm just saying." Ellis held her hand up in surrender before he could respond as she watched his brows furrow into a harsh line.

"I thought I was bloody trying, but I had so many exciting things lined up and Stell was so busy with work and..." Ellis pushed for him to continue.

"You can say what you want Harry, I won't tell Stell."

"Argh, she's just infuriating when she gets like this. Like, I don't think she realises how much pressure I'm under every bloody day. She literally ranted at me over the phone over nothing and then she laid me out in front of the people I work with and... listen, I don't wanna sound like a misogynistic prick but sometimes I just don't need all this... this feminine rage!" He finished, his free hand animated until it slapped back down to the top of his thigh. Ellis took a moment before the laughter pushed through her lips into a cackle. Harry snapped his head to look at her and then couldn't help but laugh a little. "Why are you laughing?" He asked in a tone of desperation.

"Oh, Harry you make me laugh. Just say your girlfriend is pissing you off, for God's sake. It's fine! I'm sure I piss Michael off on a daily. You've been with Stella for what? 10 years now? I mean bloody hell if she weren't pissing you off sometimes then I would think something was wrong."

"12 years actually," Harry smirked, tipping his head back to finish off the dregs of his coffee. "Honestly, we argue and bicker but she's never looked at me like she did in New York. She's the best, you know that, but she does do my head in when she gets into these... moods."

"Is it her being in a mood or is she just, I dunno, crying out for you?" She looked at him and he looked contemplative. "I've gotta be honest, and you already know how much I admire your relationship and how you've been able to make it last, but I don't think I could ever be in a relationship with you."

"Meaning?" That stung, but Harry tried not to take offence, he knew Ellis had no ill intent.

"You need to remember how hard it must be for Stella to be in a public relationship. You're literally one of the most famous men in the world right now and she has to navigate that every day," Ellis looked ahead of them, thinking about how much hate Stella got every day and how Harry never defended her. She got a little pissed off at the thought of that. "And half the time you're not even around to make all the agg worth it." She blurted out, taking a gulp of her latte and wincing at the burn at the back of her throat. Harry sighed heavily, growing agitated.

"She kept saying stuff like, 'remember who you are', on the phone. What the fuck is that about? Seriously, she can't expect me to be who I was when we were 16."

"I don't think she really means that, mate."

"Well, last time I checked, she was thoroughly enjoying the perks of being with 'one of the most famous men in the world'." Harry said, smirking cheekily in Ellis's direction.

"Don't be a cocky git, H." Ellis shut him down. She hoped that he hadn't become that person.

Harry chewed his cheek to keep from smiling, he was only winding her up but he knew he could let his ego get the best of him sometimes. He was self-aware, but he tried to go easy on himself after attending therapy sessions over it for many years. How was he not meant to get ahead of himself every once in a while when he had women, and men, lining up to tell him how amazing, handsome and talented he was? Holding up signs asking if they could call him, Daddy? Offering him jobs left and right, in industries he never thought he had any business getting involved in, with an insane amount of zeros added to each cheque they sent Jeff's way?

Stella always kept him on the ground. She'd check him, toot sweet, and with no remorse, and he needed that. But he remembered all the memories they made when they were younger, back in the 1D days. She'd fucking loved being Harry's girlfriend, that was a hill he would gladly die on. She'd loved the fast-paced, glamour of it all. She'd loved being by his side and knowing that almost every girl in the world wanted to be in her position. Travelling the world and fucking their way through tour dates. Waking up, naked and barely remembering any words in the English language but each other's names, and being too in love to worry about it. She'd stayed in the best hotel rooms money could buy and he'd flown her out first class whenever she'd had time off at university. She'd eaten at the best restaurants cities had to offer. He thought back to buying expensive lingerie for her, scheduling it to be delivered while he was rehearsing and returning to the many hotel rooms they stayed in to find her wearing it, sprawled on the bed and looking better than he could ever have imagined. He always marvelled at the way she could take his breath away. Every damn time.

She'd lived every 19-year-old's dream.

"I know she loved being with a pop star when she was a teenager, even into her early 20s... that life was new and exciting, for all of us. We all got swept up in it, including you." Ellis snapped him out of his wandering mind and he frowned, nodding. It was true, Harry's life went from zero to 60 overnight and thus so did Stella's. He made sure to take his friends with him for as long and as far as he could. They had amazing times. But everything changed when Stella graduated into midwifery, it was her dream and she was damn good at it. But her life became very serious, all of a sudden. Harry had begun to feel inadequate as a partner, he found her so impressive and it made him feel inferior. What he had to offer, she didn't want or need anymore. She had this wonderful qualification to bring life into the world, after dedicating years of her life to educating herself for it.

It caused havoc in their relationship, and confrontation began to bubble to the surface in ways it hadn't before. They'd nearly separated but decided to push through. Stella took a year out and Harry knew it was time to call it quits with the band. They'd spent time at home for the first time since Harry got on the X Factor and it changed everything. They both knew they had become a forever thing.

She gave up everything for him, to make it work. Now, perhaps it was time for him to consider doing the same. He looked at his friend, his brows deep in a frown behind his sunglasses.

"She's a grown woman now, Harry. She needs stability and support, she needs a man." Ellis nudged his side, smirking with a wink. "Her man."

"Alexa, play BBC Radio Two." Stella called to the little robotic woman who lived in her bedroom, before she began to ascend the stairs, cup of tea in hand. Delilah, the ginger Maine Coon Harry had brought home almost three years ago, dipped in and out of her legs to follow her, always her shadow. Their other cat, a Ragdoll named Percy, stayed in the living room. He'd jumped, or more accurately plopped, down into the dip in the sofa that Stella left behind when she'd gotten up. Percy was Stella's granddad's beloved pet and she'd taken him in after he passed away. He was 13 years old and yearned for a much slower life in his old age. But she adored him.

Stella and Delilah crossed the landing towards the main bedroom and while Stella went into the ensuite, the cat made haste to sit underneath her dressing table, knowing she would soon be required to keep her owner's feet warm by cuddling up on top of them while makeup was carefully applied.

The figure in the mirror over the sink stared back at Stella, with bags under its eyes and hair pulled up in a messy - not even a nice messy - bun with flyaways sticking out all over the place. She shook her head with a sigh and flicked the cold tap on to splash water over her face, in an attempt to bring her dull skin back to life. Work was killing her, she'd leave one shift, only to be back in for a double six hours later. It'd been a few days since she'd flown back from New York and she'd been almost flat out since. She hoped it was a temporary thing, due to staff members calling in sick and kept her fingers crossed it would die down soon.

The radio had been purely background noise until she heard the familiar notes and dulcet tones of her other half.

"You know it's not the same as it was..."

"You've got that right, babe," she chuckled sadly to herself. She thought back to the night Melanie gave birth to baby Molly and took a long shaky breath inwards.

Wednesday 21 September 2022

The room was dark, all but silent apart from a few monotonous beeps signalling Melanie's heart was still beating. Stella remembered the first time she'd been privy to a situation where all that mattered was that the beeps kept coming. One at a time, steady and consistent, that's all that was needed. She'd had nightmares where the beeps stopped. Dead. Silence.

George's voice, calm but stoic, shook her out of her daze. "You did everything you could, Stella. Dr. Brooks knows what she's doing, this baby will be fine." Stella looked up at him beside her, dressed in his blue labour scrubs, hairnet and mask.

"She has to be, George." Her voice was shaking, what had just happened was one of the most traumatic labours she'd come up against. She couldn't help but blame herself. After all, she'd been up for close to 22 hours by then. She wasn't up to assisting in Mel's labour, she'd been selfish in her choice to rush back and take over. She raised a wobbly hand up to her forehead and rubbed, willing herself not to cry.

Dr. Brooks worked skilfully and moved with absolute purpose, decades of experience had made her hands nimble. This baby needed to come out quickly and efficiently. Melanie had already lost a lot of blood and they couldn't afford for the baby to be starved of oxygen.

Stella closed her eyes and breathed deep.

"Take deep breaths for me, Mel." Stella was between Melanie's legs and it had been nearly an hour of intermittent pushing, to no avail. How could that be when she was fully dilated? "Come on, I know you can do this."

"I can't, I ca-can't." Melanie stuttered above her, taking huge drags from the gas and air, nearing unconsciousness.

"I don't think she's getting any contractions now, G," Stella stated, eyes wide in early panic as she looked at her general manager for help. Stella had already had to cut into Melanie in an attempt to accommodate the baby's head and shoulders, but she was just not budging.

"Stay calm. Mel, Melanie," George spoke gruffly over Stella's head and she snapped her head to look at his sudden move to the top of the bed. Melanie's head had gone slack, the spout of the gas and air tube hanging from her lips that were rapidly turning blue.

"Fuck." Stella whispered, barely audible. The following moments were a blur. She looked down at her gloved hands, gloves that were once blue but had turned red. She looked down at her scrubs, red, all the way down to her knees. "Fuck."

"Alright, here she is," Stella startled out of her reverie with the cry of a newborn. A beautiful newborn baby and it was possibly the most gorgeous sound she'd ever heard. The relief nearly took her out at the knees. George threw an arm around Stella's shoulders and squeezed and she smiled for the first time in what felt like days. Her ears pricked up as they searched for the all-important sound and there it was. Beep. Beep. Beep.

Under the flowing water of the hospital shower, Stella felt numb. She rested her head on her shoulders and let the droplets run down her body, breathing deeply. She thought about Harry. She wished he was there, it made her face crumble for a moment and she let a fist hit the shower wall in frustration. She might have fucked up her job and her relationship in one night, impressive even by her standards.

Stepping out in a rough, clinically pressed white towel that probably took off a layer of skin as she rubbed it up and down her limbs, she'd never felt more drained. She was tired to her bones. A friend on another ward, Angel had travelled in to bring Stella some clothes as she only lived a short walk away. She'd left them in Stella's locker for her to collect before going on her shift.

She dragged the velour trackie bottoms up her legs and threw the hoodie over her head, forgoing a bra - there was no way the girls were going to be constrained while she was in this mental state, that might've actually driven her to the brink.

She rubbed her hands over her eyes and tried to get the image of Melanie's unconscious face out of her mind. Baby and mother were both alive. Melanie was torn up, but she was alive. That's what mattered.

Towelling her hair dry, she couldn't wait to get home, get into bed and most likely cry herself to sleep. Throwing her bloodied scrubs into the wash bin next to the lockers and grabbing her bag from her locker she left and pushed the door to the staff changing area open. Had it always weighed a tonne? Shuffling in Angel's sliders that were a size too big for her, she smiled softly at Val who was still at the front desk. She'd probably finished, gone home and come back in the same time Stella had been dealing with Melanie. Val smiled smugly and looked to her right. Stella followed her gaze and nearly doubled over when her eyes landed on him.

"Oh my god," she sputtered through a breath. "Harry."

He looked up at the sound of her voice, his eyes fluttered open and he shook his head slightly to adjust to his surroundings. Vision clearing and landing on her, he rose from the hard plastic chairs and Stella finally broke down. Her face crumbled at the pure comfort he brought just by being near. He was wearing what he'd worn to the arena the night before.

"Harry, have you been here all night?" She sobbed and he welcomed her to step into him bringing his hands to cup her cheeks, catching her tears with his thumbs. He nodded subtly, his brows pinching in the middle, exhausted and emotional. She dropped her bag to the floor and craned her neck slightly to push her lips to his, short quick pecks as he stroked the skin under her eyes.

"I love you," he whispered. "Please, don't ever run away again."

"I love you too, I'm sorry, baby." She whispered back, stroking his hair back and scratching the back of his neck.

"And you flew right after her..." Ellis said wistfully, looking at her friend as they neared the metal bench at the top of the Heath.

"Yeah... not gonna be winning any awards for eco-friendliness any time soon." He joked.

"Fair play, you can be a bloody romantic sod when you want to be, H." She marvelled, looking out to the skyline below them. He looked out to watch the rest of London going about their lives. An older couple caught his eye, holding hands and walking in step with each other down the hill. He thought about Stella for the umpteenth time that day; that was nothing new. They weren't perfect, but that night when she'd helped bring new life into the world, they'd brought new life into their relationship. And watching the pair of strangers continue their stroll, as the man brought his partner into his side to kiss the top of her head, he knew it would all be worth it in the end.

Because she'd been there all along.

----

Hope you enjoyed this little glance into Harry and Stella's world. If you've made it this far, I love ya!

See you next time.

Nel xo

Itty bitty taggy listy:

@lomlhstyles | @jessitpwk

#harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles writing #harry styles angst #harry styles fic rec #harry styles #harry styles masterlist #harry styles one shot #harry styles fluff

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xxsksxxx · 2 months ago

Text

Almost Heaven

Summary:

Mulder’s attempt to find more exciting cases to investigate while stuck in the bullpen turns into another weekend trip to the forest.

Meanwhile, Scully is faced with a tempting offer that could change both her future and their lives.

This story is complete, and I’m going to post one chapter a day.

AO3 | Back to the Beginning | @today-in-fic

Chapter 10: To the Place I Belong

Washington, D.C. Scully’s apartment Sunday, November 29th, 1998, 11:05 am

Scully let herself into her apartment and closed the door behind her. With a weary sigh, she leaned back against it and closed her eyes.

The familiar sounds from her empty apartment surrounded her, and she listened for a few moments to the clicking of the refrigerator in the kitchen and the ticking of the old clock in her living room. Her grandmother had gifted it to her when she’d moved into her first apartment, she remembered with a smile. A time when she’d been so full of hope and ambition. She listened to the muffled sound of children laughing and shouting at each other outside on the street until she felt herself calming down. Scully straightened back up, took a deep breath, and bent down to take her shoes off.

First things first, she thought, making her way into the kitchen and filling the kettle with water before setting it on her stove. While she waited for the water to heat, she checked the messages on her answering machine and leafed through the mail she’d left on the table next to the door on Friday. The mundane chores gave her time to settle her emotions and calm her mind.

The kettle started to whistle, and she methodically prepared herself a cup of tea, before carrying it to the living room and taking a careful sip. Her mind drifted back to the last few days.

Mulder’s words in front of her apartment were playing in a loop in her head. ‘Scully, you do make a difference. Every day. Not only at work but most of all in my life.’ She took another sip and put her hands around the cup. The warmth seeped into her palms, and she inhaled the calming peppermint fragrance wafting up.

I do know that, she thought. And I also know he means it. But is that enough? her mind questioned. Enough to always run in circles? To take one step forward and two steps back? To know that we might have to keep searching for the truth on our weekends and evenings while spending our days calling farmers about their fertilizer?

She exhaled and leaned back, staring at the ceiling. Talking about going in circles. She was nowhere closer to deciding than she had been Friday evening. And time was running out. Hadn’t she joined the FBI six years ago because she had wanted to make a difference? And hadn’t that choice nearly led to losing the respect of her father? She had thought the X-Files were exactly where she could make that difference, and she’d decided to stay, despite it costing her her sister and her health.

And what about her own life? Would she regret staying with Mulder? Her best friend—but still just that? During family visits holding babies, in church, watching people hold hands, and listening to friends plan couple vacations?

The new role would give her more room for things like that, she mused. No assignment could have as crazy hours as their quest for the truth. A smile curled her lips, and she recalled Mulder’s excited face the day before when he’d found the deer droppings in the forest, trying to convince her it was a sign of the existence of their Mothman.

Taking the offer would mean leaving those moments behind, she thought sobering. She closed her eyes, trying to imagine a life without him, and without Mothmen—not to slog through rainy forests on Saturday afternoons and research DNA after working hours, so she wouldn’t be caught by the lab staff, questioning what she was doing.

Life would be dull, she thought, and suddenly it felt like a weight was lifting off of her shoulders. She’d have time to sit at home and read books on Saturday afternoons instead of arguing with Mulder about West Virginian folklore. And with sudden clarity, she knew she’d be bored out of her mind in this normal life. She’d always be wondering what they could’ve uncovered and what truths they might have revealed together. Mulder was right. It just wasn’t the same when they weren’t doing it together.

And even though she’d always stay in his life, and couldn’t imagine ever saying no to joining him for one of his side investigations, it wasn’t the same. She’d have to meet him outside of work or for lunch, and just the thought of not being right by his side—even if it meant accepting that they might always be just friends—made her stomach turn.

Losing him and possibly his trust and friendship and what he had come to mean to her was—unthinkable, she realized with startling clarity.

Suddenly, it all seemed so clear. She put the empty cup down on the side table and walked to the window, opening it wide and taking a deep breath of the fresh November air. A part of her mourned the cost of her decision because deep down she knew that she’d never find anyone she could feel even close to what she felt for Mulder. This decision could mean that she’d spend the rest of her days in the shadows of hidden truths and mysterious secrets. And never in the light of a home she’d share with someone she could come home to, where the darkness would not follow.

With a deep breath, she picked up the phone and dialed Skinner’s number. He picked up on the second ring, his ’hello’ full of guarded suspense.

“Sir, it’s Agent Scully,” she said into the receiver. Not waiting for a reply, she continued, “I’ve decided on your job proposal. I want to thank you for considering me, and I deeply appreciate that you offered this role to me. However, I have to decline. I feel like my current work is not finished yet.”

There was a heavy silence on the other end of the line, and then she heard Skinner sigh. “I’m not really surprised, Scully,” he said after a while. “I suspected that’s what your decision would be. And I understand. Even if it might not seem like I do.” He paused, waiting for Scully to break in, but she remained silent. “Very well. I’m sure you’ve made your choice considering all the relevant factors, Scully.” He waited once more for her reaction, but when she again stayed silent, he finished the call with a quick goodbye.

Scully heard the click of the line being disconnected and took a deep breath to calm her racing heart. It was done. Now she’d only have to let Mulder know. She checked her watch, wondering if Mulder had arrived at the gunmen yet and what he was up to. Probably researching Mothmen droppings, she chuckled. She couldn’t wait for their usual nighttime call to arrive to hear all about it and to let him know what her decision had been.

Her neck cramped, and she stretched it from the left to right, trying to work out a kink from having been up in knots for hours. She could feel a headache forming behind her eyes and rubbed her temples. Right now, she needed to relax and ground herself before she had any more emotionally intense conversations, she decided.

With a spring in her steps, feeling almost weightless, she made her way into the bathroom, deciding to take a bath. She’d meant to try out that new bath salt, she’d gotten recently anyway. Scully stepped in front of the mirror, looking herself in the eyes, she smiled. Everything would turn out all right—even if it wasn’t going to be like she had hoped.

#xfiles #xf fanfic #fox mulder #dana scully #msr #I Wrote This #Almost Heaven

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gard3nias · 4 months ago

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07| A laurel

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wc: 4.92k

date: 13/07/2024

mdi // masterlist // playlist

—Now playing: Master Baster (Jammin’) by Stevie Wonder ✫

One could firmly state that a week has an original appearance in everyone’s mind.

Mondays are blue, tiring, heavy and overall an experience anyone would want to skip after a lazy Sunday.

Tuesday can be heavy too but they’re bright which enlightens your mood—their weight doesn’t matter because Monday was enough for you to get the cue that the week had started.

Wednesdays are grey, the chance of rain is so high and the gloomy look of the day dawns upon you draining you of every energy you have but you remind yourself that it’s just Wednesday so you hype yourself up.

Thursdays. Now Thursdays are like Tuesdays because they’re bright and heavy but the weight is multiplied because you’re genuinely tired and just want to get it over with.

Fridays might feel heavy too but it’s just because you want them to end soon so you’re, by default, lazy from the moment you wake up.

On Saturdays, after a good amount of sleep, you have great energy you most likely want to burn in hobbies, parties and overall enjoyment—although it’s not always like that.

While you can party on Friday and Saturday night, on Sunday you must not do anything that would leave traces till the following day so no parties, no refurnishing or painting a bedroom, nothing that could take a physical toll on you—Mondays are as boring and tiring as they are and must not worsen.

Despite it being just his second week of school, the third for others, Taehyung had already entered this cycle.

It was Tuesday, a bright day, as aforementioned. The previous week was rainy but now the sun had returned with the lovely breeze that adorns the town in late summer. Yes, it could’ve been gloomy and rainy but it didn’t feel like it to him ever since he discovered the existence of the new town girl in his school. She had the power to brighten the gloomiest of days and make all the stress within him wither by just existing.

An exact week, seven days, has passed since the first time he’d set eyes on her. Last Wednesday was a day of downpours but he still went to school by bus refusing Jungkook’s offer for a ride. He wanted to see that angel again and admire her beauty from afar but like the previous day, his plans were shattered when he didn’t see her get on the bus. He later assumed she got a ride to school when he saw her getting to class in the morning.

Throughout the rest of the week, during break times he’d search for her and his eyes would catch her in front of the same window, eating her snack and leaning on the windowsill looking unfairly pretty.

He’d studied her fashion style. From an objective point of view, it was pretty simple, nothing too extravagant, just good skill at combining colours but, according to him, it was awesome, she’d found what was best for her, what made her feel like herself—but even if she wore rags, he’d still consider her a goddess.

His studies allowed him to conclude that she loved low-rise bottoms whether they were pants, skirts or shorts. She also had a thing for small shirts, not the heavily cropped ones but just enough to expose the lower belly.

He could also affirm that she probably liked lacy things: she enjoyed wearing shirts with lacy top and bottom edges. She wasn’t shy when it came to dressing. Would expose a little bit of cleavage when she felt like it and cover it when she didn’t but her cleavage wasn’t what made him curious. Whenever she did expose her cleavage, she’d wear nicely combined necklaces that made him praise her fashion style even more.

But let’s not forget his favourite part of her. Her hair which she barely styled. Left down sometimes, held up with a hairpin or a pencil other times. Taehyung loved their waves and felt like they played a big role in her visuals—although he’d still be drooling over her even if she was bald.

Jimin didn’t know all this as he talked to him, ignoring the silence he was receiving. Jimin was the type of friend who enjoyed sending his friends reels and funny videos. Taehyung was the type of friend who wouldn’t keep up with them, occasionally liking some but not all.

Jimin knew this hence he was talking to Taehyung nonstop, showing him the videos, explaining the meanings behind them and why they were amusing. Taehyung would only glance in his direction and smile when he’d see him laughing his ass out. ‘Oh that’s my cue to react,’ his mind would tell him.

But the videos weren’t always about being funny—or adorable, like cat videos—some were of skaters getting seriously injured or of recipes. Taehyung was like a folder to Jimin. He found discomfort in having to save the videos in a folder so he’d directly send them to Taehyung because, out of all his friends, he was the one he texted the most so he was always the first in the top line of contacts.

“Look at this shit,” he began once again, phone pushed in Taehyung’s face, “Don’t know what he was trying to do but bro set the whole street on fire. Look at that!” he exclaimed in shock, finally capturing Taehyung’s attention as he too was left astounded by it. “Fuck!”

On the room’s left wall, which faced the anteroom, was a row of windows interrupted by a wide sliding door that led to the backyard. There were Jungkook and Avyanna. That was their usual spot in Adrielle’s house. While she and Taehyung studied and did their homework, with Jimin trying to catch up behind them, these two would simply be in a corner playing or smoking.

They loved getting drunk for the simple sake of it, playing cards and punishing the loser with rounds of drinks. If you want to bring out the creativity in them, you’d simply have to bring alcohol and some cards. Voilà.

Currently, they were playing simple Uno cards though.

“Jungkook, I’ve already told you. That’s not how you do it,” Avyanna whined, throwing herself back in exhaustion, “Fuck that!—”

“No! It’s a rule, Kook! Follow it!” she proceeded. “A rule that you brought out of your ass cause I’ve never heard of it”. Jungkook had a leg spread out while the other bent against his chest, permitting his arm to rest on it, hand falling nonchalantly and crowned by various bracelets adding up to the decorations drawn on his skin. He was dressed in a pair of baggy light-blue jeans, and his grey hoodie was on the couch, leaving him in a baggy T-shirt.

“No, I didn’t. In the original game, you play like that,” Avyanna faced him, legs folded allowing her to sit on her heels as she sat up straight to concentrate and play. The top of her thighs was covered by a jean skirt, and a little bit of belly showed because of her red cropped top.

“Anna, this is a table version of it where rules are passed on verbally and exist to make the game more fun…not fairer,” he smirked, enjoying the look of utter disbelief on her face.

“Kook, you can’t be serious,”

“Fuck yes, I am. And anyway from when do you know shit about Uno? It’s just a silly game,” Avyanna’s dramatic gasp made the laugh he was holding back spill out, “What? It’s just a silly game. Funny that you don’t know anything that is actually useful but know a few stupid Uno rules—”

“Kook!—”

“Am I lying? The other time in class you pondered too abnormally long on what is six times eight. Like, Anna, be for real,” now it was Avyanna’s turn to laugh. The event he just referred to was, as she named it, a slight moment of confusion because she hadn’t fully got into the routine of school. “Oh, come on. That was just because my head was still on holiday—”

“But six times eight? Six times eight!?” his dramatic screams made her laugh even more as she recalled the dumbfounded look on his face when it happened. If she had water in her mouth in that moment she would’ve involuntarily spat it on his face for how funny he looked.

“It’s the easiest to remember because it rhymes with eight. In fact, it contains eight!” the look of disbelief she had before had transferred on his face and she was back in the moment when the event occurred for the first time in class.

“Darling, if you can’t remember what is six times eight, you can’t tell me half shit about how to play this stupid game,” he shook his head as he played his card for the game to continue. “Now I can’t even have a moment to shine. I’m a girl of very few talents. Give me a break,” she confessed, laughter lacing her tone as she also played her card.

“Oh but if I am the one telling you that you don’t know shit you’ll be all like: Kook!” he mimicked her, her eyes bulged out of their sockets at the bad impersonification, “Stop! And shit like that,” she let out a breathy gasp, shocked by his words and how he badly whiny made her sound. A smile prevented her mouth from fully opening.

“You know what? You wanna make the game more fun? Let’s make up these stupid, senseless rules you talk about. The more we stack plus-four cards, the more shots we take,” slamming her deck of cards backwards on the floor, she rushed to open the bottle of alcohol sitting next to them and started pouring in the shots. Jungkook simply smirked, cockily smiling as he felt victory by his side.

Once she was done serving the drinks, she slammed her plus-four card into the game, determination on her face. Jungkook smirked again, slammed his plus-four card and wiggled his brows in her direction, determination on his face as well.

Avyanna wiggled her brows back and slammed another plus-four card. “We’re at plus twelve, Jeon,” she notified. He had only one plus-four card left and by how she sounded, he didn’t know if she was empty-handed or fully loaded but he had to go on.

“Plus sixteen,” he lowly spoke. They kept eye contact like they were two gamblers playing for their lives.

“Plus twenty,” her voice sounded like the sharp hiss of a snake. His strong demeanour slowly fell off and her smirk grew bigger.

“Oh, fuck you!” he finally gave up, her victorious and evil laugh as the background sound to his failure. “Fuck you, Kook. I fucked you up big time! I’m not that talentless, you see?” she sang, laughter slurring her words.

“Oh, shut up! That’s just luck,” he whined as he counted the cards he had to collect, “The same you have whenever you get a good grade in a subject you only ‘studied’ ten minutes before the test?” his droopy face brightened up, taking the statement as a compliment.

“And? You can’t call it beginner’s luck because I’m well-experienced,” Avyanna rolled her eyes, annoyed that her words had put an end to her moment of celebration.

“Shut up. Remember that the cards are not the only things you’ll be taking today,” she wiggled her brows again, seeing that his mood changed. “Hmm, interesting. Never knew you always had the intention to take me out, Avyanna. I’m offended. You shattered my heart into tiny pieces,” and she simply laughed, “And regardless, why the fuck out of seven cards you had that many plus-four cards? What fucking game were planning on playing?”

She whole-heartedly laughed again at his dramatic complaints and once she calmed down, she said: “Who gives a fuck? But I can’t let you take twenty shots… would be an unfairly easy way to die. I may not be smart but I can get creative”. His reply was a simple blow of smoke into her face right after he turned the cigarette on. She smacked his leg as payback.

This was the atmosphere lacing Adrielle’s home.

Right after arriving, the blondie had gone upstairs to get changed and was finally joining her friends. Since the weather wasn’t too cold yet, she opted for simple shorts and a white off-shoulder top.

“Hey, y’all! I’ve been working on something hit since last year”, Adrielle spoke as she walked into the living room. The original aim of this meeting was for study purposes. They didn’t have much to work on at the moment although they felt like a test was at the door and just needed an official announcement from the teacher for it to come in uninvited.

Adrielle, though, had been working on something but, like she stated, not just for the past few weeks of school.

The sunny day outside did justice to her living room, shining light through the many windows that occupied most of the confining walls and reflecting on the light-coloured furniture. She was the only one with soft slippers on while her friends were all in socks, some lying on the couch, others sitting on the carpet. In her hands was a blue ring binder.

Ignoring the lack of verbal response from her friends, she proceeded to the centre of the room and slammed the ring binder on the coffee table, finally getting everyone’s attention.

They didn’t move though, just looked up at her from their phones or the TV—or Uno cards.

“I want to become the school’s president this year but I need a team before I can run for it,” and everyone froze, brain-processing her words.

“Wait what?” Avyanna asked, clearing her voice after just taking a shot of alcohol. Adrielle repeated her words even more slowly so they could register and let the words sink in. She was firm on her decision.

“Oh, well then. I can join you,” Taehyung immediately offered himself and right back at him was Jimin. Adrielle smiled and accepted their help, happy to get their support.

“Well… finally. ‘Been thinking about why you haven’t done it yet,” Jungkook simply commented, moving closer to Taehyung who was exploring the blue ring binder’s content.

She rolled her eyes at the statement and simply sat between Jimin and Taehyung as she explained her plans for the campaign. Meanwhile, Avyanna was still astonished.

“All these are easy for you to do, you’ve got the money and the power,” Taehyung explained, simplifying the issue, “Yeah, he’s right. You’ve already won basically. It's giving nepotism a bit though,” Jimin affirmed, making Adrielle initially shily blush but she was soon rolling her eyes at the last words. “Don’t jinx it!” she only replied.

“When are the elections?” Taehyung asked, getting even more serious, “So first, we’ll have to advertise our team—”

“And that’s already done. Are you forgetting who we are?” Jungkook butted in, words coming out messily due to the cigarette between his lips.

“ First, smoke that shit outside. Second, no, I’m not forgetting Jungkook but we have to make things right and follow the rules so we still need to do things like creating an Instagram profile for our team, printing out flyers and doing practical changes in the school to get more votes,” Taehyung and Jimin nodded as they listened. In the meantime, someone else scoffed and got closer to them.

“Adrielle? One party at mine and we’re done,” Jungkook’s words disintegrated Jimin’s seriousness as he laughed, agreeing with him, “Taehyung, why are you looking at me like that? Your pretty face, in fact, our pretty faces will have all those naive freshman kids drooling. They’d do anything to get on our good side and what’s better than a party open for everyone? Nothing.” Jungkook spoke, almost theatrically, gesturing with his whole body, expressions decorating his face to enhance his words.

“Jungkook, how you say it is weird. We’re not some bullies or law-breakers so following the rules, as Adrielle said, is the right thing to do,” Taehyung softly spoke, facing his interlocutor.

“Hmm, talking about following the rules,” Jungkook simply side-eyed Avyanna before proceeding with his opinion.

“No, we’re not some evil jackasses who like to expose people’s secrets to instore fear in them but you want to tell me that I’d be lying if I say a party at mine is all you honestly need?” Avyanna rolled her eyes as she listened to him, not moving from her previous position in the backyard. Silence was the reply he got though.

“Damn, didn't know y’all liked to follow rules so bad but anyway, y’all do your shit, I do mine. You do the boring part and I do the fun part. Nice deal, don’t y’all think? We merge the two like they do in politics. One side for the good and one for the bribing,” he laughed.

“I’d want to object to that and tell you to contribute in the ‘boring’ part but it’s better if you don’t so deal! And get that shit out of my house!” and Jungkook loudly cheered. Has been craving to throw a party since he got back from holidays, already fed up with school’s monotonous routine.

“Nana can help me with restoring the school’s garden. That shit looks like a graveyard, but I still have to ask her though” Adrielle proceeded, talking to a serious Taehyung and a giggling Jimin who was trying to pay attention to her words but was focused on laughing at Jungkook’s jokes.

Nana was Taehyung’s grandmother with whom Adrielle was very close. She was his inexistent sister and his grandma’s inexistent granddaughter.

“As I was saying, firstly there will be a day dedicated to the presentations—it’s a not full day but most of it—and then, a week or two later, there are elections. Everything is done between mid and late October so we have like a month to do everything, barely even, so we have to act fast. You guys down for this? Let's all run as a team?” she questioned, looking for agreement in her friends’ eyes—or at least anything at all.

“I can help you with it. Presentations included,” Taehyung calmly spoke, “Me too,” Jimin raised his hand.

“I'll take care of the parties and Avyanna will use her face for clout-chasing—”

“Oh, fuck you, Jungkook! Fuck you and your backhanded compliments,” she hissed at her now-cackling friend.

Filling the papers contained in the blue ring binder, other than the garden renovation plan, were also plans of reconstructing some parts of the gym and most especially forming a serious cheerleading team for the school.

So far, the easiest to achieve was the garden revival plan but that would come after creating their social media profile and the flyers for advertisement.

“When are we starting?” Avyanna inquired, arms crossed around her chest, trying to come off as unbothered to Jungkook since he was trying to walk past her and she wanted to hit him without missing her shot.

“Technically it's right now—”

“But practically isn't. We should set up a meeting for us to work on this. A date could be…?” as Avyanna spoke, her eyes glanced in Jungkook’s direction, waiting for the right moment to strike. He knew this and was trying to outsmart her.

“Careful Adrielle, she’s trying to take your spotlight— oh, sorry, she wouldn’t last a second there. Lacks so many things—”

“Oh, fuck you!” she screamed, launching forward onto him but missing just for a little so she didn't give up and ran after him. His loud giggles echoed through the room.

“Friday and Saturday?” Adrielle proposed and all agreed except for Avyanna and Jungkook—too busy being kids.

As they left the room, the topic soon changed—the blue ring binder soon out of sight—moving from campaign preparations to homework and studying for which Taehyung was always down. Jimin on the other hand was already tired of sitting still for too long and wanted to do something more practical and fun than homework: cooking. So he stood up, waved his friends goodbye and went to the kitchen to have his type of fun.

Avyanna and Jungkook soon went back to playing Uno.

Taehyung was sitting on the carpet, opposite Adrielle with his books spread out on the glass coffee table. Headphones covered his ears and isolated him from the curse words polluting the air around him—thanks to Jungkook and Avyanna. In front of him, Adrielle adjusted her hair, rolling it all to one side so she could write and unconsciously covering a bit of the skin revealed by her off-shoulder top.

Less than an hour later, Jimin’s doings started leaving traces all around the house, the perfume moved from the kitchen to the hallways and the living room, stimulating the now rumbling stomachs of Jungkook and Avyanna who made a beeline for the kitchen.

—Now playing: Light by Wave To Earth ✫

Adrielle’s house was a big two-story building that seemed to have contained generations and generations of her family. It was the farthest from school, deeper in the outskirts of town hence the humongous land it occupied with space to park as many cars as they wanted, both indoors, in a garage, and outdoors, space to have a greenhouse, a well-designed green space ornated with hedges, flowers, trees, a swing here and benches there.

The house in question followed a light theme both outside and inside with sand-coloured bricked walls outside and a light-grey roofing. The interior waved between white and honey-coloured shades.

Just the anteroom was very wide but was nothing compared to the living room attached to it, peeking through the wide opening of separation. The light that shone all over the room came from the windows facing the anteroom and the tall ones above it on the first floor.

“Man, I love your cooking. If I were your child and didn’t hit the gym as much as I do, I’d become obese in the blink of an eye. I’d eat nonstop,” Jungkook mumbled as he chewed. “That would happen only if I cooked unhealthy foods but I’m an expert in this field. I know everything I need to know,”

“Not true. You still have things you learn as you grow,” Avyanna said before biting on her piece of food. “Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean. You don’t need to spoil the mood,” he whined, causing her to laugh, happy to have gained the reaction she wanted.

“Anyway, this is a recipe I created by myself,” immediately, his friends’ eyes bulged out in surprise as they hurried to compliment him, trying not to choke on their food. Meanwhile, Jimin proudly let the praise sink in as he nodded and crossed his arms.

Their loud talking soon distracted the students in the living room, mainly Adrielle and as she left, it called for Taehyung’s attention who took his headphones off and followed her to the kitchen. “There they come! My very diligent babies. Come have some of this before these lazy sacks of potatoes eat everything up,” Jimin cheered, gaining groans and eye rolls from the people he just mocked.

“Where I come from, who works the most gets to eat the most. Your lazy asses are still full of energy, don’t need extra. It’s not like y’all will spend it anyway,” he scolded them like a mother, “Oh, you don’t know!” Jungkook began, faking a dramatic cry, “This… t-this atrocious excuse of a human being—”

“Huh, me?” Avyanna looked at Jungkook, a smile across her face as he pretended to be a scared baby hiding behind Jimin’s shoulders and pointing at the perpetrator with teary eyes. Funny cause Jimin is shorter than him.

“She attempted to take me out by forcing me to take twenty shots of alcohol, a strong one at that. Jimin…” he whined, pulling on his arm and exaggeratedly pouting. Avyanna couldn’t hold back from laughing as she tried to defend herself.

“Never forced him. We stacked up to plus-twenty cards. He complained about the game being boring so I decided to spice it up. Sorry,” immediately, Jungkook’s voice went back to serious as he too wanted to clear any misunderstanding and defend himself.

Jimin, in all this, paid close to no attention as he simply smiled at their childish behaviour.

“The game was never boring to begin with but you wanted it to take a boring turn because the original game…” and back he was to impersonating Avyanna in such a vile way that dragged a full-hearted laugh from everyone in the kitchen and a dramatic gasp from Avyanna herself.

“I don’t sound like that, you piece of shit!” she screamed hoping he’d stop but he kept going.

“Avyanna, what’s six times eight—”

“Jeon Jungkook!” she screamed while everyone exploded in a guffaw.

—Now playing: Ditto by New Jeans ✫

They never went back to studying again after the episode. Actually, it ended in a slight fight between Jungkook and Taehyung about who was going to take the last piece left on the plate. Taehyung stood on Jimin’s previous words about the quantity of food he’s entitled to eat since he studied more than Jungkook did. Jungkook called the saying stupid and simply said that since he hits the gym more often than Taehyung, he burns more calories so he’s entitled to have it, in fact, he has to eat more since he has to grow more muscles.

Jimin tried to find a compromise by offering to share the piece in two but the contestants wouldn’t accept. He looked around for back up but he found the girls choosing their fighter and rooting for them, Avyanna for Taehyung and Adrielle for Jungkook.

Both the boys side-eyed the girls at the odd choice.

“Oh, you know I studied and he didn’t at all,” Taehyung whined at Adrielle.

“Avyanna, we do shit together the whole time. This ain’t the time to betray me,” Jungkook explained to which Avyanna replied: “Thank your god you have anyone rooting for you at all.

In the end, while Jimin tried to share the piece, he quickly chugged it all up and ran out of the room, leaving the boys bamboozled and the girls laughing their butts out.

Jungkook offered Taehyung to ally so they could go search for Jimin and hold him hostage so he could remake the delicious food for them but Taehyung refused and simply said he was tired. Jungkook didn’t back down though as he offered the same to the girls who were down for it just to have some fun.

So, while the three went Jimin hunting, Taehyung excused himself to the backyard for a reason none of them would’ve guessed—at least that he knows of.

He wanted to look for the mysterious girl through Cleo’s profile. That was his only lead for the moment.

With his food in one hand and his phone in the other, he found a seat that wouldn’t have him back-facing the entrance to the backyard and risk getting caught. Only then did he settle down and hop onto the application, wondering why he hadn't done it beforehand.

He doesn't follow Cleo but, luckily, she has a public account so he can do what he wants without disturbing a soul.

She had lots of posts—wasn’t the type to overthink about it—and among the latest ones, he recognised the mysterious girl’s wavy hair pattern. He never clicked on anything so quickly in his life as he did on the post—it went almost instinctively. But his hopes were shattered when he saw that Cleo didn’t tag the mysterious girl’s profile on the post.

A mix of anxiety, disappointment and confusion overwhelmed his sense of reasoning as he went back, attempting to check Cleo’s following but, here too, she wasn’t shy and followed half the app’s users. He almost wanted to give up, a hint of sadness making its way into him when he noticed her highlights. How stupid of him not to have thought about them first.

The first highlight, the one he pressed on first as well, had exactly what he was looking for.

He didn’t know it but the first picture was the same taken on the first day of school. His pupils expanded, getting glossy as he marvelled at her beauty. “She’s unreal,” he whispered to himself, passing a hand on his face as if her beauty was frustrating him.

The very little tag at the bottom read: ‘4lavrel’. Once the profile opened, his eyes stopped racing up and down the screen as they did on Cleo’s profile. They slowed down, wanting to sip in as many details as they could, brain-storing them immediately in the long-term memory lane.

His analysis of her love for lacy things popped into his mind as he noticed her profile picture. Her profile was similar to his with barely any posts or full-face pictures. She mostly posted pictures of her surroundings from which he deduced that she indeed loved reading.

She undoubtedly had a calm demeanour as he could understand from the overall vibe of her feed and the aura around her in real life. He imagined how it’d be if he was closer to her or even spoke to her. A small tickling feeling rushed through his guts at the simple thought.

4lavrel. That was the name of her Instagram. Oh, he’d just found his new hobby. The only thing missing now was a fake account.

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ome-magical-ramblings · 1 year ago

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Offerings and Salutations to the Teachers, Teachings, and Community.

This post is dedicated to my friend who's still in prison and will leave this month. I hope to file this post under the practical heading of my index as I see this a very necessary part in the practice itself. Respect and thanks to all the teachers and teachings I was given in my past lives, this life, and future lives. I am so grateful for that.

Let me start it practically and offer you the method. It's really simple and all you have to do is a candle and a glass of water. I don't recommend this for any teacher and only for teachers you know and trust wholeheartedly. I recommend you do this carefully and in case you don't have a teacher you trust then go up to the original founder or a divine figure you trust like Buddha, or Jesus, or someone like Lao-Tzu or Hermes Trismegistus.

Once you have the image of the teacher or their names or your connection to them then you will set up a candle, incense if possible sandalwood or frankincense or frankincense and myrrh AND a glass of water. Then you offer three prayers: 1) Thankgiving 2) Blessing 3) Offering

an example would be like "Thank you Hermes for the teachings of Hermeticism and for the magic you have taught me and inspired me with these techniques" or offer them Psalm 150. Blessing is that you bless the water, the candle, the frankincense in their names. Key of Solomon have stuff to consecrate them, you can also consecrate them by praying Psalm 23 on it, or something from your heart. Lastly the offering , is that you have to word it out and say "O Teacher of This tradition, Thank you for offering and continually supporting my practice by providing the teachings and the magical teachings for us."

edit: I almost forgot but the offering dispose of it under a tree and if you can't then you can flush it down.

Very simple and direct but you can expand on it :) to suits you. Do it often, do it on Wednesday or Sunday or Saturday and what there? there's an incense mix you can use to help with this 1/4th teaspoon Alum , 3 teaspoon of Mace, and a teaspoon of frankincense or benzoin then you make a sincere prayer for an incarnate teacher, finding a good teacher, etc. Now Theory wise or just me talking to you, my imprisoned friend used to do the buddha dhamma sangha vandana to motivate himself and inspire discipline in his practice and that's a good thing! this shows the important of the teacher, teaching, the community/magical chain working in the whole system of practice. Once your practice is a CHAIN then you have this line or this connection going through as arab or muslim call it "madad" which pushes the presence through the community. There's a really good point where you want the teachings to continue, to show you that you're grateful for it and to help the people who deserve it to reach it, no? When you dedicate time to help people reach the teaching then you also open the doors for yourself to reach higher places, it's not a one-way thing and just like we give thanksgiving to our ancestors for their help we also BLESS them and it is like a circle/spiral. We are not disconnected or living in a vacuum, the recluse in mountains or someone who we only hear of them after their death these people are making waves and changes around and stuff are happening!! So don't think that your prayers and incense and thanksgiving are not heard, THEY ARE HEARD. Put yourself out, have faith, and I believe that you will find the blessings and benefits of praying for the teaching we found, for keeping them, for having them "here" and for continual existence in our world. if you do want someone to help you, what are you bringing to the table? and this is a very good read that I recommend from Mark Stavish on Teachers and what you're bringing to the teacher:

EDIT

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evita-shelby · 1 year ago

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Congrats on the 3 yr anniversary of your first Peaky series, Juli! 🎉 Could I pls request a drabble with Eva x Jack using the 3 word prompt “now or never”?

Thank you Lee 🖤

Here you go, i hope you like it

Now or Never

“I am telling you, haricot beans are the superior beans, sweetheart.” Jack joked as he saw his wife pulling a twist on his mother’s recipe of Boston baked beans. He’d taught her the recipe the moment he saw she could actually do shit for herself. "Pinto beans will get you flayed at the church potluck next week."

“You weren’t complaining last sunday.” Eva points out as everything in the kitchen passed her last-minute inspection.

Alice, the maid he’d hired for her, pretty much served as company for his wife instead of the help. Between the two of them they’d gotten the house ready for the Nelson’s first dinner party with the neighbors next door.

The neighborhood had been friendly when he moved in, only for them to become cool and even downright shitty when they saw his wife.

Even Frank had not been able to get over her being a Mexican woman even when Jack made it clear he was to treat his wife like he’d treat him or find his chances at being president fly out the window with him.

Samuel and Helen had been nice, utterly oblivious to the sort of life Jack and Eva had behind closed doors and their kid, Robert, was not a pain in the ass even if he’d caught him looking at Eva’s fine ass when they were washing the car last Saturday.

He’d sprayed the kid with the gardening hose and Sam had laughed while Helen had apologized for the kid. Next thing you know they are hiding the guns, the knives, the whiskey and the personal massager that makes Eva stop speaking English all together when Jack positions it just right.

Fuck, Eva’s even wearing pastels. Shame all the buttons are gonna end up all over the place once the Williamses leave, she looks nice in pink. So sweet and innocent, you wouldn’t think she convinced him to fuck in a confessional the first time they met.

“I like your cooking, why do you think I took you up on your offer to walk in the evenings?” he nuzzled and kissed her neck as he pulled her onto his lap as he took the chair on the table for two in the kitchen. “Although, I’m not opposed to changing that exercise for a different one tonight.”

“I’ll hold you to it, amor.” she murmured and begrudgingly stopped him from getting a premeal workout.

Something that surprised him as Eva has never been one to deny him something they both want; it was only when the doorbell rang he understood why.

“Now or never, Evie.” He whispers when they compose themselves and open the front door.

A/n: vibrators of a sort existed, they were essentially hand-cranked personal massagers.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt was very anti-latino and purposely excluded Latinos from all his aid packages so we'd leave or die, you can see how that worked out for him.

I am loosley basing the Nelsons on the Kennedys and their lived a quiant suburban life before moving into the Kennedy Coumpoud in Hyannis Port, Boston.

You can view the Kennedys' house on here

#jack nelson peaky blinders #jack nelson x oc #jack nelson x eva smith #national anthem fic #3va's party

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jules-has-notes · 22 days ago

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2019 VoicePlay summer activities — fun in and out of the sun

After a whirlwind spring full of travel and nearly nonstop video productions, the fellas took things a little easier for the summer. That's not to say that they spent those months chilling on the beach, of course. They just mostly stuck closer to home and worked at a more reasonable pace.

Freedom!

The guys did get a bit of downtime at the beginning of July, hanging out with loved ones. Eli and Ashley took a trip to upstate New York to spend a week with her family, then popped back to Florida for a few days with his. Meanwhile, social media addict manager Geoff caused some unintended mischief during his leisure activities.

(Sadly, the instigating video does not seem to have survived.)

J.None celebrated Independence Day not once but twice with Paradigm Party Band at Icon Park in Orlando. During at least one of their sets, the band backed J for a performance of his latest original song, "Back At Home", which he would release in both audio and video formats a few months later.

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From melacholy to joy

When the weekend came around, the guys rolled out two new music videos that evoked very different emotions. VoicePlay released a gentle, heartfelt ode to friendship with their cover of Cyndi Lauper's "True Colors". Then PattyCake unleashed the next episode in their Villains Lair series, gleefully highlighting some of their baddies' vanity.

A few days later, Layne and Tony headed back to the PattyCake studio to film two more Villains Lair episodes in as many days. The next installment featured a motley gang of sidekicks, and the season finale was filmed out of order so that they could include Emoni Wilkins as Ursula while she had time to come to town.

Hallelujah

The following weekend, J.None spent his Sunday sitting in with the backing singers for Kris Williams at the House of Blues gospel brunch.

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singing "Expectation" by James Fortune during soundcheck for the HoB gospel brunch with Kris Williams

Christmas in July

VoicePlay gave their fans plenty of time to plan for the holidays when they revealed the first location in their upcoming Warm Up tour. They would be returning to the Gaylord Palms resort in nearby Kissimmee for a holly jolly good time.

The next day, they provided another gift in the form of the delightful "Aca Top 10 – Sitcom Themes" video that they'd recorded the previous month.

"They really like us!"

August started with a bang as the A Cappella Music Awards winners were announced, and VoicePlay took home the title for Pop Group of the Year.

They also got to celebrate some friends, since Home Free repeated as Entertainers of the Year (once again beating out Pentatonix), Tim Foust garnered Composer of the Year (edging out both Chris Rupp and Peter Hollens), and Chris's new group 7th Ave took home Quartet of the Year. Sadly, Earl lost Male Vocalist of the Year to another worthy contender, Cody Qualls of FACE Vocal Band, a group of fellow Sing-Off alumni from the first season.

Since it had been quite a while since their last version, the boys put together a new Patreon promo, thanking their existing patrons and giving a gentle nudge to potential new supporters.

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Music, music, music

The next weekend brought another music video double feature. VoicePlay offered up a beautiful rendition of "Bridge Over Troubled Water". Then PattyCake released their next Villains Lair episode, starring a huddle of loyal henchmen that they'd filmed the previous month.

The week after that, the guys headed to a fun new location for their next music video, a retro-inspired update of the doo-wop classic "Sh-Boom (Life Could Be a Dream)".

Further festivities

Saturday brought a chance to celebrate Eli with a 40th birthday party that was apparently such a rager** that the only photographic evidence on Ashley's Instagram is a couple shots of their sleepy dog and a sink full of dirty dishes in the aftermath.

** for suburban, middle-aged values of "rager"

The next day, VoicePlay announced the earliest show in their holiday travels, this time a double-header with Cimorelli, a family of musical sisters based in Nashville. The two groups would be heading to Waukegan, IL in mid-December.

The following weekend, J.None headed home to Virginia Beach (with his nephew in tow) to perform at the annual Kids Bash fitness event, organized by his older brother.

September began with a surprise for a young friend. One of the guys' theme park pals had a daughter who was both a big fan of the group and a talented singer in her own right. When mama Michelle asked VoicePlay to film a brief message for Adriana's fifteenth birthday, the youngster couldn't have expected the opportunity that would come with it.

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Needless to say, she was a little stunned. Stay tuned for the product of that collaboration.

Up, up, and away

As the first weekend of the month approached, Layne and Tony headed north to Napierville, IL so that they could be on hand for the final rehearsals and opening night of Danny Gonzalez and Drew Gooden's "We Are Different People" tour. PattyCake had produced videos for the team to play during the shows, as well as creating their color-coordinated wardrobe.

While Tony headed home, Layne scooted over to Fort Wayne, IN to meet up with the rest of VoicePlay for a corporate gig.

After a few days at home, the boys headed out again for two nights in Lincoln, Nebraska. The UNL Bathtub Dogs were their opening act on the first night, and the local paper provided a very nice recap and review of the evening.

The day after they returned home again, J.None met up with his Paradigm pals for a fun surprise birthday party at a local venue.

Let the good times roll

Near the end of September, VoicePlay gathered at the PattyCake studio to film their big spooky season production number for the year, "Oogie Boogie's Song" from The Nightmare Before Christmas.

They closed out the season with a trip to the northwest for a show in Burley, Idaho, where the audience included a busload of students from a local school.

The last few months of the year would bring even more live shows, music videos, livestreams, family time, and milestones, but all of that will get their own posts in due time.

#VoicePlay #traveling musicians #behind the scenes #long post #link-o-rama

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