#of course it isn't perfect
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The thing about King The Land is sure, the plots with the trope-y sister is annoying and yeah, the writing is a little baggy and drawn out but dude. Give me a healthy main with lots of SOFT and I’m here for it! Legit these two doing it in a fluffy non-slice-of-life rom com?? YES PLEASE!
#king the land#of course it isn't perfect#and can i mention that everyone is always going around thanking eachother lol#but like still#I LOVE THIS COUPLE#they still have two episodes to ruin it but listen#junho is a king who picks good dramas!!!#Lee junho#bias#kdrama
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Wu trained Morro at the same time that Garmadon was training with Chen which MEANS that Misako was around to see what the pressure of wanting and training to be the Green Ninja could lead to.
So later when she had Lloyd and KNEW that he would be the legendary Green Ninja, do you think she thought of the child Wu had once trained? The kid who became so obsessed with proving himself that he put himself in danger time and time again? The little boy who ran off into the night and never came back?
After seeing that, is it any wonder why she didn't want to leave her son-- the actual Green Ninja-- to be trained by Wu at such a young age?
Maybe a boarding school for bad boys would never make him want to be a hero. Maybe it would keep him safe from the destructive power of destiny. Maybe Darkley's was the only way to save her beloved son, Lloyd Garmadon, from himself.
Maybe Misako remembered Morro. And maybe, just maybe, she knew it would be best if her son never turned into someone like that.
#misako haters say “why didn't she just leave lloyd with wu where he'd be safe?!” as if morro didn't literally die trying to prove himself#no hate to wu either though#morro was his first student and also naturally ambitious so it's not entirely Wu's fault that he turned out Like That#also there is the thought that wu had like just barely banished Garmadon to the underworld and Misako was maybe kinda bitter about that#or at least she knew her son woild either find out and hate wu or he would grow to hate his father#and remember Misako left because she didn't want her son and husband to have to fight. she was searching for a solution#so of course she left lloyd in a place that would make him want to be on the same side as his father. even if he was trained to be good in#the future he still grew up with the love and respect for his dad in his heart#look i know Misako isn't perfect but y'all have to stop hating on her#she did her best when all she was given was absolutely terrible options#cookie crumbs#my writing#ninjago#ninjago misako#ninjago morro#ninjago garmadon#ninjago wu
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another Vital AU hunter-and-camila thought from this morning was a thought of, like. camila very very very gently and carefully explaining that she'd like luz to get a basic physical done by a doctor in the human realm, because luz has not been seen by a human doctor since she was four and is overdue for ten million vaccines and desperately needs bloodwork to check her vitamin and thyroid levels, etc, etc, etc, and hunter is like. visibly freaked out and upset by this. bc he is SO afraid of strangers hurting luz.
anyway. that's all pretty much expected, on account of The Horrors.
what got me in my feelings was the thought of camila telling hunter that she has a lot of the same worries, and that she Knows not all human healers have good intentions, and that she Promises she'll take that into account when finding one for luz. because she does not want luz to get hurt.
hunter, naturally, is like "how.... do you know that....?" and camila is like ay dios mio. HOW do i explain medical racism or the united states..... to a boy.... with no concept of racism or the united states.....
#not that i think she has perfect tumblr-style praxis vocab for it anyway. however#it would be disingenuous for me to pretend that being an afro-latina woman in a 2010s/2020s political climate does not impact her#characterization here. camila has a lot of Big Parent Fears that are Extremely Reasonable.#hunter doesn't know the history of course but it makes camila's caution about luz line up spectacularly with his own. so that's something#ultimately i think she'd just tell him that she's known people who were affected by bad human healers#and that human healing isn't any more perfect or morally pure than the healing coven.#given that explaining the minutiae is. A Much Longer Story.#i've been thinking about camila a lot lately. both in this AU and in the canon i just...#i LOVE when there's One Character who's grounded in Being Fucking Normal. it's Wonderful#the straight man of fantasy bits. camila is worrying about her daughter's college tuition and her mortgage while battling magical bullshit#she's Perfect.#toh#princess luz au#camila noceda#hunter toh#horrible mindscape trauma pals#racism#medical abuse#medical malpractice
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they wouldn't let me write the live action Disney adaptions because I would have had the best Ping you have ever seen. He and Shang would have had chemistry that took your breath away. They would be Yearning. the audience would be Yearning. it would be electric and terrifying and by marika would Mulan/Ping be hot. Shang is obsessed, the audience is obsessed. there would be hardly be a person in the attendance that doesn't Get where Shang is coming from. who wouldn't rend their clothes and scream to the heavens over Mulan/Ping. she takes no prisoners.
and yes, Shang kisses him in the snow as he cradles Ping's injured, dying body.
and yes, from the opening scene to the rolling credits he's going slowly mad.
and the first time you see Mulan she's dressed in the most feminine, floaty, light-colored dressy robes, with bone white makeup and painted lips and you fall in love with her. and there's something underneath, too. and it's so intriguing.
and then she shows up as Ping, and it takes a while to get used to, and it's kind of funny and awkward. but then it looks better and better to you. and soon you find you can hardly bear it when the camera turns away from him for even a second. and Ping isn't awkward to be around at all, he's stunning and brave and resilient and determined to be kind and you're desperately in love with him and you decide he looks incredible in the warriors' robes, actually. and his smile makes you want to kiss him. it makes Shang want to scream. and to kiss him.
and then comes the last leg. and she's got the gender-neutral robes, the "neutral" stage makeup. the loose updo. and you've never been as attracted to anyone in your life as Shang is to her. and you get it. you really, really get it. and wow the way the cuff of her sleeves and the silhouette of her robes make your heart clench. and the way her posture, her gait, make a new kind of sense. you can feel this is It. this is The Costume. you're obsessed and Shang is obsessed.
And then in the end, she's wearing pretty soft-colored robes and it makes you think for a moment that she looks like she did at the beginning. but then actually something makes her strength visible too. is it the cut of the costume? her posture? the framing of the shots? Yes it is. and you know, when Shang shows up, You know he can see it too. and he doesn't want to stop looking any more than you do. and he isn't going to even when you do.
every kid that ever watched my Mulan would recall it as Formative, like y'alls Danny Phantom but on the sickest steroids ever invented. She'd be irresistible. and so very gender.
#i was a huge shang fan as a kid#you can't tell from this post bc it's all about Mulan#but I would do my boy Shang SO GOOD#you'd adore him at the end. and be cheering him on and begging him to stop and gasping from frustration just watching him#but most importantly you'd believe in the goodness of his character. a man; young and under immense pressure; doing his best#fighting his hardest#anyway I market the movie for theaters with her in the girly clothes and then all merch and promotional material afterward features the#shan yu final showdown outfit#the one that makes you go mad#that makes you forgive all of shangs transgressions on the spot#you take one look and say#yeah ok. my boy was right alright. look there were extenuating circumstances. no one could think in this environment#but if course that's actually where they work together THE BEST#and it's soooo good#and it convinces you that they are perfect for each other#sorry about all this guys#I'm still mad this isn't what happened with the live action frankly#i will probably never come to terms with it
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#ilkka villi#the street where i live#På gatan där jag bor#ilkkavilliedit#*#mk.op#mk.gifs#mk.edit#oi watch it queuegirl#can i just say i appreciate how his hair isn't like...perfect#(but it is of course)#but i mean like there's strands flying about#it's so real and true#and komea
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Happy birthday Sakura & congratulations for the conclusion of Clear Card Arc!! ✨✨✨✨
#cardcaptor sakura#card captor sakura#clear card arc#ccsakura#clamp#sakura kinomoto#syaoran li#akiho shinomoto#yuna d. kaito#I definitely wanted all of them together to celebrate the conclusion of the story#kinda had to rush it towards the end#of course these celebrations had to happen during a national holiday when I was busy otherwise#so yeah it isn't perfect but I tried to finish it since this one has been hanging around for 5 months
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when people send me tummy pics i'm like. okay cool do you want me to fancy you bc that's how you get me to fancy you like tummy is just one of the most attractive part of the body objectively, please feel free to send me tummy photos rn to my asks and i will shower you in compliments
#let's showcase tummies for how perfect they are#ALL tummies#if you think i don't mean you i do#“oh but my tummy isn't flat” send it#“but i have stretch marks” send it#if you want to of course#like i will be thinking about kissing it and tickling it#to be transparent#tickle community#tickling
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"their relationship is romantic" "their relationship is familial" "their relationship is platonic" you're thinking too narrow. their relationship goes beyond labels. the family is inherently queer. their platonic love is romantic. the erotic is familial. each one is the other and the other is them
#.txt#i've gotten to the point of relationship anarchy where i no longer understand the obsession with labeling relationships#there's a post floating around like 'it doesn't matter if you view them as romantic or platonic the point is that they love each other'#and i get the message. however may i propose that distinctions such as that don't even have to matter. consider#bold claim probably. but whatever i didn't have the choice to think about love in a normative way and as a consequence i have thoughts#of course i am thinking about wincest but it applies everywhere. jopzier even#jopson views crozier as a surrogate parent but in an inherently queer way. does that mean he want to fuck his mom? probably not#but the fixation and need for redemption turns the traditionally familial relationship into something far more#do you understand#once you leave the normative behind labels become useless#do sam and dean love each other romantically or platonically or familially? consider: it doesn't matter. there are no words to describe it#their love is queer in the sense that it extends beyond normativity. society holds no sway over them. they are ungovernable#i find it ultimately unhelpful to discuss fiction in normative terms when the characters themselves exist outside of normative society#shows like supernatural and the terror are perfect examples. sam and dean were never normal and franklin crew left normal behind#the arctic doesn't care if you fuck your mom. the impala doesn't care if you kiss your brother#this isn't really about anything i just saw that post the other day and i was like. why doesn't this Hit for me. well this is why#however it IS helpful to discuss fiction set within normative society in relation to normativity. it's relevant!#most stories are not however set within the bounds of normativity. that's kinda the whole point of a lot of fiction#baby i explore relationship anarchy in ways that you couldn't even imagine#<-tldr#i have a tendency to write essays in the notes every time i post something. sorry about that. it feels safer here and i am skittish
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proper reupload in the high quality this fantastic segment so deserves; eagle pig and duck bias notwithstanding, this will forever be my favorite variant of the fabled switcheroo (and a reminder that Daffy was first at his own game!) the committal on behalf of both characters--especially the sincerity of Daffy's feigned sincerity--really sets it apart
#that delivery of “don't you believe i'm a fish?” sounds so hurt and it's perfect#likewise i think there are few one-liners/toppers that make me laugh as much as 'i told ya i was a pig'#and that all knowing glance at the audience from Daffy doesn't feel obnoxiously smarmy or self aware#there's a friendly nonchalance to it. a very clear amusement and not in a way that undermines anything this segment is setting out to achie#again. my favorite buzzword: that sincerity! a sincere investment and amusement in watching Porky obliviously and endearingly make an ass#out of himself#and of course the cross dissolve and setup of the composition implying a story/sequence of events taking place within that time...#this short isn't my favorite P+D short--i still LOVE IT A TON but there are so many i revere--but i think it's one of the most definitive#if someone was looking to get a good understanding on their character dynamic this would be one of my immediate recommendations#i haven't had the bandwidth to spread my pig and duck gospel but please#watch Porky and Daffy cartoons#tangential but i've always loved the sound effect Treg Brown uses for Porky dropping the gun#good exaggeration/whimsy while also connoting Porky's stubbornness and that this stupid petty argument is enough for him to lose sight of#his motives and discard his murder weapon. all because of this joyously stupid argument. so i like the self awareness there with how obtuse#the sound effects are#because anyone who is not Porky Pig would have just shot him point blank#and that is everything i love about their dynamic and how Daffy's intoxicating charisma and ability to get people invested even affects the#very characters on screen#gee d'you think i ought to have said more about this scene#lt#duck soup to nuts#freleng#vid
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i completely understand the bisexual headcanons but there is something so 👌👏👍🤌 about gay and lesbian steve and nancy. like...the comphet is brain deadening.
#nancy in particular#like she dates steve because thats what she is supposed to want and she gets so much positive reinforcement#but she thinks she actually wants jonathan#because he's sensitive and maybe a bit feminine and not what is expected of her at all#and maybe thats better#maybe she just needs a different type of man#but#it still isn't right#it still isnt enough#she wants....she wants...fuck she WANTS#and steve just flirts with every conventually attractive girl#if he can just have the perfect girlfriend and be the perfect boyfriend it will all be ok#he seems baffled by the idea that he is supposed to date someone he really truly likes#of course its all about image what else is there?#i just think its neat#i almost never see bi eddie and gay steve i think that would be fun#stranger things#steve harrington#nancy wheeler#steddie#also like i love steve and i dont think nancy handed it well (understandable) but#their relationship WAS bullshit#i think steve really thought they were in love but i also don't think he really understood what that is#or what it could be (like this is canon to me)#i think nancy knew on some level they were both pretending maybe she didnt realize steve didnt know this#and so like sure maybe men are hot sometimes like whatever it doesn't mean anything tho#he wants a wife and kids so it doesn't matter#and then he gets with (eddie) and is just like ???? what are these feelings?? how is he so hot??? sex is so good now????#is this how its supposed to feel??
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This really goes along with the COD is a cult idea, but like cult leaders, Dark Enchantress is not a good parent.
Lets be honest, when your attempt at remaking your own success via making a new life (possibly even a breakthrough if you interpret Matcha being baked as an adult), but that new life literally cannot be the success you were because they lacked love in the process of their creation. You may not be the best person, especially if you proceed to treat that new being (basically your own child) as if they don't exist and are only a nuisance (are you getting my point here?).
Also, let's be honest, do you actually think she's was that good of a mother to Red Velvet? Considering how he has had no remorse in the amount of chaos and blood/jam-shed he's contributed to? The countless hounds that have been baked and died due to the war that was bound to start the day he was born? Plus, the fact that she seems to never visit or attempt to catch up with him, and may be trying to replace him with Butter Roll with the whole "Making the perfect cookie" thing? (No discrimination to RV fans who think the opposite btw)
Also, nobody can deny that she was neglectful with Matcha right out the gate. There's no amount of HCs that can save that parent-child bond without diving into AU.
Anyways, shitty parents, am I right? Also can we discuss how many kids she's indoctrinated into the COD because they were alone and vulnerable?
#matcha cookie#dark enchantress cookie#red velvet cookie#cookie run kingdom#cookie run#cookies of darkness#crk#No seriously DE is a horrible person and the worst parts of white lily with nothing of her redeeming qualities#A grade A bitch. If you will.#Yeah that first comic is about matcha running away and disowning DE as her mother.#It's lovely. Isn't it?#Girlie(DE) literally forgot she was made from a whole person 😭#Of course you were gonna end up with someone entirely different from you#Even if that hypothetical person WAS the perfect cookie.#RV was the golden child tho- no matter which way you put it 😔
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I know this is a hot take but allowing Xie Lian to be a genuinely flawed character who makes mistakes and, in the past, has been (and can still be) wrong but still tries to be good, with his inherent goodness not dependant on these things, makes him a better and more sympathetic character, and actually enhances his goodness rather than taking away from it
#let!! him!! be!! wrong!!#let him make choices that weren't perfect#let him be imperfect in his actions (sometimes taking the course of action that isn't the best)#let him be wrong in his judgements#it's not going to diminish all the times he isn't#i love xl but fanon perspective often puts him on a pedestal (when the entire novel is about not doing that but still loving and appreciate#-him because he's still such a good person who tries so hard and strives to be good even tho it usually ends in failure and gets up again)#xie lian#tgcf#heaven official's blessing#mxtx#tian guan ci fu
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Not to be emotionally vulnerable on main but I was talking with @marbleflan about it this morning and I think it's worth saying aloud - it's been YEARS since I got this deep into a fandom, and part of that is of course Interview with the Vampire being great television, but more of it is the fandom itself.
I reinstalled Photoshop on a whim, hadn't made a gifset in years, thinking I'd do a one-off and that's it. But then everyone was SO enthusiastic and funny and engaged and kind in the tags, even when I was feeling very self-conscious about the quality of stuff I was making. So I tentatively made another, and people I didn't even know kept on being so friendly and welcoming.
It's probably been 5 years since I actually like... met and followed new people from first interacting in fandom spaces, and it's such an exciting and also a bit scary thing. The last month or so has been a real blast and I've met so many folks that I'm excited to get to know and just. I'm feeling really really grateful I guess. 😭
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#rose rambles#and yes of course i'm sure the fandom isn't perfect (when are they) but my overall experience has been SO positive and supportive and warm#everyone is much too kind and it's a bit intimidating but also very cool
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At this point I don't think Teruki's parents are exceptionally horrible individuals (long-term psychological consequences still happen in cases in which the abuse isn't considered particularly severe + everyone is capable of harm, even "good" people), but they weren't the best, without a doubt.
Okay, they got too busy with their jobs and had to move overseas to progress on their career. External circunstances. Things that happen. They left their son behind, but that could always be justified by hectic schedules of ever-moving businesspeople. How else could he have a stable routine to focus on his future? They're just busy. Teruki hasn't seen them in long but that's not their fault, right?
They cared for Teruki, didn't they? His parents made sure that there was someone home to watch him whenever they were far away. It was inevitable that there would be times he would be with himself, though. But that's not bad! It only became a problem once those strange espers tried to take hold of him on the street. And even then, they were so weak he could barely give them the title of a psychic. It wasn't an issue that it happened more and more and there was no one to intervene. Or that Teruki had to torture descriptions of "Claw organization" and "brainwashed soldiers" out of these grownups to know what they wanted with him. His parents couldn't know. Why should they know? Better put: what could they do?
What could a normal person do against someone with psychic powers?
It was Teruki's choice to live by himself. He could manage it all. Contrary to the other kids, he was an independent and responsible young man who could be trusted with a house and money. Such a great boy. His parents were so proud to have someone as competent as him as a son, one which wouldn't mean hard work for them. One who always had the best grades and was the soccer team's best player and was the best student on the town's best middle school.
Of course they would suddenly allow Teruki to live on his own. Any parent with a child like him would, wouldn't they? Anyone on their right mind and who knew the slightlest about him would be sure he could do it.
And even if this "Claw" organization scared him a bit and he felt a bit lonely at times, it wasn't an issue. Issue would mean it was an obstacle - which it wasn't, as Teruki did perfectly on his own. His parents believed on so. That's why he had his own apartment at 12 on the first place. Teruki was so wonderful at this. It wasn't horrible if they didn't answer his calls, because they were so busy and he wasn't a little kid who depends on his mommy. None of this was their fault. He shouldn't bother them or himself over this.
Because they cared, right? On the end, it was only a pile of tragic circunstances and coincidences no normal person could act against. It was part of life as someone special like him. He couldn't expect that his parents could change any of this, and this made his loneliness the best possible choice. It was obvious that they would support such a decision.
What would a normal person do against someone with psychic powers?
#this was supposed to be a short description of how I imagine the Hanazawas but I got carried away with the prose#I suppose I'll leave some of the original idea here on the tags#for some reason Teruki's parents seem to be the type of absent parents who do care about their children#yet they don't have the slightlest ability to provide a happy and healthy life besides the generic ideal of a perfect kid#a kid who has a nice home and money to have fun and is physically healthy and has good grades#and their son is so special. of course they would brag about him at any opportunity to do so because it shows how they're good parents#yet they don't put any extra effort on caring for their kid besides this “minimum”. why would they? isn't he happy enough?#they gave such a damn perfect life for him! look how great he is doing by himself! look how he is an amazing kid!#and they say it like an irritatingly oblivious owner talks about their pet dog who has clear behavior and health issues#and their lack of emotional effort and actual care for teruki's wellbeing is so morbidly comical it warps into not being even funny#its just painful and absurd and they don't have an idea on how their choices are absolutely crazy bad#because there is no way you could be implying they're bad parents. they love teruki so much#mp100#mob psycho 100#teruki hanazawa#lalá rambling...
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𝗠𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝗚𝗮𝗹𝗲'𝘀 𝘃𝘂𝗹𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗴𝗴𝗿𝗮𝘃𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗽 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘂𝗺𝗮 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗲𝘀, 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗠𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮 𝗮𝗰𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗽𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿. This lengthy headcanon will refer to canon dialogue from mostly Gale, sometimes others. Reader's discretion is advised. There will be in depth explorations into grooming, emotional abuse, heavy manipulation, and suicide.
First, let it be said that Gale, a mortal man, will always be the powerless one in his dynamic with Mystra. Of course, nearing forty years of age, he remains entirely responsible for his own actions, his own blunders and every hurt he'll cause, but it's important to remember who formed much of who he is: his goddess, his deity, and egregiously, his lover.
Mystra is power. Mystra is possibility. She knows what sway she holds over her Ioyal, vulnerable, and entirely mortal followers. In all ways that matter, they are but lambs she can steer and herd as she sees fit. She knows they can't deny her and knows they'll never want to. Gale's sheer servitude and complete devotion. Mystra, knowing that, used him to filth.
Gale: I was just... practising an incantation. Player Character: No, there's more to it than that. I know devotion when I see it. Gale: What can I say? She's—she's Mystra. I can't describe it, the need I sometimes feel to see her - to draw the filaments of fantasy into existence... Mystra is all magic. And as far as I'm concerned, she is all creation. Player Character: I didn't realize the depth of your devotion. Gale: Magic is... my life. I've been touched with the Weave for as long as I can remember. There's nothing like it.
Gale, orb in his chest, doomed to be eaten by the very thing he loves the most, still speaks so reverently of the goddess, of his lover that has left him to die. He conjures images of her memory—and she is all the while forgetting about his.
Minsc: Gale reminds me of vremyonni of my homeland. The man-mages of Rasheman. While the girl-folk go on to rule as wychlaran, Weave-touched boys were hidden away. Trained to work their craft in silence and secrecy. It is an old custom, not well-observed. In truth, I thought it born of caution after some catastrophe of wizardly men-folk of old. Now, I wonder if it was not done to hide them from Mystra, and the snares she sets for young and prideful boys, hm?
Tales of Mystra's treachery spreads far, leaving those familiar waters surrounding Gale's tower in Waterdeep. They whisper her name, afraid to utter it one time too many, suspecting, perhaps, that she'll show in their mirror like some Faerûnian Bloody Mary.
Talent rouses Mystra. She can see who uses the gift of the Weave and feel them, sampling whatever delight sings their veins as they pull from her domain. Not unlike a spider, she'll follows every tremor that strikes her as just a sliver more profound; and Gale, a prodigy, plucked the Weave's web to so garner her focus. And like some black widow scurrying, she surged down that ripple to prey on a boy. There, Gale, so impressionable, was just a mite older than twelve whole summers. He sat so stunned, beholding Mystra as she lured him into the cradle of her Astral domain. Bathed in her magic, pleasantly coddled within that glittering cosmos, Gale felt blessed in a way he'll struggle always to recount, no word, no language, fit to describe it. He felt chosen. He felt seen. And potently, to a child, he felt loved. Now, imagine a child experiencing something like that. Imagine what they'd think, how brilliant they must be when stood beside the rest. She told him he was gifted, made his heart swell not unlike a child's appetite for praise. She knew what she was doing by offering these morsels, by preying on a child's most delicate mind, and Gale, child prodigy, was already so awash in the idea that his value was in magic. Unfortunately, Gale, susceptible, had no way of squirming out of his goddess' grasp.
Reality: She's laid down the seeds to creep into his heart. When he's just old enough—seventeen's sufficient, she thinks—she stakes her claim and makes him hers.
Gale: My virtuosic talent once caught the eye of the goddess of magic herself, Mystra, who named me her chosen and her lover.
Gale is stunned when she takes him to bed the first time. (Is this really happening?) Mystra claims his mouth in a kiss, taking everything she knows he offers so willingly. Mystra, of course, is not so stunned.
Dream Visitor: An elder brain... one of the cruelest and most powerful creatures in existence, enslaved by mere mortals. Gale, tasked with Mystra's missive to sacrifice himself: This is it... I must do as Mystra commands.
Gale has worryingly low self-esteem beyond his magic. As already explored, his entire worth as a man hinged on and was built entirely off his talent as a wizard. He fought tooth and nail for any crumb of affection Mystra would offer his way, something she only gave him at all seeing his gift as a child. He wants her forgiveness. He desires it genuinely. He believes so firmly that he has wronged his goddess, buying into the idea that sacrificing himself will right his wrong. She holds such dominion over him, making him reduce his confidence in himself into a mere, trifling pittance; after all, she wasn't just his lover, but the patron deity he prays to. And regardless, Gale is a people pleaser, his initial acceptance of her missive coming as no surprise.
After all, Gale, at times, goes to incredible lengths to appease his audience. This habit, compulsion, impulse, whatever you want to call it, is a quality that was relentlessly exacerbated in his relationship with his immortal paramour. He wanted to content her, felt all he did was never enough, for as a matter of principle, he was oceans, leagues, and entire galaxies beneath her. Gale figures: well, how can a short-lived dalliance satisfy a god? He had to make her happy. Indeed, he'd done everything she'd ask. He'd bedded her how she liked, kissed her how she wanted, and of course, even said those words she'd said tasted best. She was his lover, a lover that never tended to his own needs and pleasures, and he fooled himself into thinking that's enough. He won't bend backwards for everyone, mind you, but if you're of the ones he would, he would stop at nothing to make you happy. After all, people pleasing is a way to keep oneself safe, a trauma response to sidestep discomfort, and though it achieves only a direly tentative peace, when that is all you've been fed, you will pursue it.
Gale did not want to lose Mystra; he couldn't bare the sting of it. And so, when Elminster visited him, Mystra's call for his death offered oh so callously, Gale, heartbroken, felt that part of him kick up. He couldn't endure the guilt, was so hungry for a chance to let his weighty heart breathe, even if it meant dying in the process.
At least this way, he'll finally do something right. At least this way, Mystra will forgive him, and all his friends will survive.
Gale: After I was afflicted with my condition, I locked myself in my tower for an entire year. I was inconsolable, wallowing in my self-inflicted tragedy. I'd given up on myself.
As a byproduct of people pleasing, Gale, too, is all too quick to accept all guilt. He self-deprecates, gaslights himself to a venomous degree, and twists his reality in so cruel a way as to make him the villain Mystra'd led him to believe. He self-flagellates himself, the first one in the world who will throw Gale of Waterdeep a mental punishment. Mystra's a goddess, after all, seen as utterly faultless, and twined so tightly with a being so mighty in esteem, Gale slipped into the role of the guilty often. When tied with anyone with grandeur like this, so immeasurable in their own self worth, it's important to keep in mind this: you are nothing but a prop in which to fulfill their ego. Gale was not Mystra's, not by a long shot. Rather, Gale was a tool, simply her mortal extension.
And he took every blow meant for her... a common and terrible habit for many people in imbalanced, ego-fueled relationships.
Gale's life beyond her wasn't something that interested her. She took most of Gale's devotion, manipulated his life to be her sole mantle of attention, for Mystra is not a goddess that shares very happily.
Indeed, long before his self-imposed isolation, this jealous deity did well at keeping him isolated.
Player Character: Picture kissing him. With tenderness. Then, with passion. Gale: I... I didn't think— Narrator: You perceive quick-fire embarrassment, trepidation, and finally... elation.
And so, cheated out of love, so reduced in his value as a man and lover both, suffice to say, Gale's slow to believe he can ever be loved. That's what happens when you're with someone so cold, consistent only in their infinite lack of respect. Gale looks at fondness, and he feels—confounded, to be sure. He thinks, is this truly mine to have? He doesn't know what to do, is nearly forty in game, and despite having lived decades devoted to one relationship, he feels, at the same time, entirely out of depth. To be frank, he greets it with embarrassment, like he's been caught red handed with something not his at all. He's like a child caught rummaging with his hand in a cookie jar, all this isn't mine to enjoy, not mine to indulge in, but he thinks, startled, but god, do I want. He wars with disbelief, uncertainty, and need, and in so many ways feeling utterly starved, with just a glimmer of affection, he falls fast into love.
Scenario: (And if properly romanced, it changes his world.)
Gale: In her (Mystra's) likeness, I used to read a thousand stories. She was beauty, wisdom, elegance, power... she contained universes. But now... it is hard to see any redeeming qualities in a lover who condemned you to death. I'd much rather gaze into your eyes than hers. Yours are capable of tenderness and feeling... No god could ever compare.
He says it with sincerity. There is such wonder, such love, and such awe in his eyes. He makes the act of kissing him feel like you've just reached into the trenches to but pluck him soundly from his ruin and despair. You think, Gale Dekarios, how unloved have you been all this time?
Gale: To know you love me for the man I am, and not the magic I command… none have loved me so purely before.
The answer is: entirely.
For so long, Gale thought love was simply being chosen. He knew nothing of being favored for the quality of his character, to be cherished and accepted even in those ways he fumbles and lacks. Again, his needs were seldom met, often treated with utter indifference by Mystra herself, and to meet someone so eager to treasure him, dote on him in a way his heart, his body is somberly new to, raptures his spirit and captures his soul. He's seen for who he is. He's... loved, desired for his silly quips, his easy smiles, and his growing affections. He bares himself to them, and in turn, they cradle his heart like something entirely precious. Gale thinks this has to be dream. He says, at times, you are more than I deserve.
Scenario: (But sometimes, he hopes too strongly and loves too greatly. As it always does, then, like he's once more wanted too much, he watches something beautiful slip right through his fingers. Of course, Gale Dekarios. Of course it does.)
Player Character: I didn't know you felt so strongly, Gale. Gale: Perhaps I should have done more. Been more charming, more flattering, harder to reach... but I was only myself, and sometimes that isn't enough.
They don't love him anymore. It breaks his heart. He hurts so much, so profoundly and deeply, and he doesn't realize that he breaks their heart in turn.
Unable to ever voice his feelings with Mystra in any way that amounted to much, Gale's a tendency to wallow, expressions coming off as potentially 'guilt-tripping' and even, on occasion, passive aggressive. Firstly: Gale NEVER means to manipulate emotions, and he's no intention of twisting anyone's arm, either. Fact is, Gale, never taken seriously when he'd bared his vulnerabilities to the Mother of the Weave, can end up saying just a little too much. He feels very deeply, and for most his life, seldom had an outlet for these weeping sentiments. He sometimes lets slip raw words and oftentimes heart-wrenching expressions; all the same, it's not so pitiful as to shepherd an outcome, but rather, is a gesture taken by a man so desperate to be heard. It may feel like scheming, but the truth is far, far greyer: feeling as though he's no right to share the depth of his heart, Gale simply lets it geyser out in a way he can't cork up. In ways he doesn't realize, he's adapted to this ache, passively reacting so his feelings can at least be seen and recognized—no matter how pitifully unwhole. With someone who values so little his thoughts... well, when he slips into these moods, one can hardly feign shock.
Situation: (And if no one shows him trust and tenderness, any true care in his character or worth, Gale gets swallowed up by how wronged he was.
He thinks: Let me be a god. Let no one hurt like me anymore.)
Gale: They only want us to serve them, pray to them...and ultimately, to die for them. But what if we didn't need them? What if we wielded their power instead and helped ourselves in all the ways they refuse to? I could make that happen.
Gale is not above anger, and as stated, he is not above pettiness; however, more than that, he is not above righting himself whatever wound he was struck. Gale, if not offered much by ways of affection, understanding, is made to believe that one idea that's lived growing in his mind: Gale Dekarios is far from sufficient; he has to be more. He has to be better. Gale, in such an unkind ending for himself, sips too desperately—and perhaps greedily, too, but desperately serves as a far better word—at that idea that he needs power. And so, wresting the Crown of Karsus for himself, he spites Mystra in his own way, becoming a god he feels is leagues better than she will ever be. Damn her thoroughly. Damn her ego, her power, and her endless indifference. He will serve the people, protect them, and in ways Mystra never could, better the world.
Situation: But as a god, he loses all sense of his kindness. Humanity. All who loved him leave him, and even Tara spurns the image he's become. With power, he's gained the respect he thought he always wanted... but in turn, he lost in even greater measure all the love he's known.
Endnote: But healing, knowing to forgive himself and knowing he's deserving of care simply for being Gale Dekarios will remain, always, the best path for him.
#HEADCANON.#Oh... anyway. This. Was. A lot.#And it was a lot for me mentally and emotionally to write.#So much of this hit home.#Gale isn't perfect. He can be petty and immature—a byproduct of not being all too good at venting his frustrations when#it gets to a point. He has very bad self esteem. He is not forgiving of himself and is too forgiving of Mystra.#He endured FOR DECADES the cold indifference of a goddess he called his lover.#I know people dog on him because he's a grown man with these hurts and traumas and responses#but just because his trauma manifested in ways you don't find palatable or hot or sexy#doesn't mean they aren't scars left by trauma buddy!!!#And quite frankly that bit about God Gale sounding vindictive and angry#yeah! SOMETIMES people who have so cold and uncaring and belittling a partner#end up angry. You shoved someone into a corner and hounded them for SO LONG. Don't start crying when they rear back on you and bite#I have a deep connection with godhood Gale. But obviously a healed Gale that finds love and acceptance in himself is so much healthier.#I'm rooting for you Gale (always).#So much of this was typed up with a lot of first hand experience so... to say this was a Gale exploration#as much as a way to navigate my own trauma is an apt one.#No two tales of abuse are alike of course. Gale's experience isn't my experience. But I can sympathize a great deal.#TL;DR: This meta post means a lot to me. K. Thanks.
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Probs a random question, but IK moved to England when she was quite young, right? Does that mean she developed one of the many accents there, and if so, could you tell us which one?
ooh i haven't really thought about this before... it's definitely not one of the posh ones, that's all i can say--
let me think about this... the boring answer is just "received pronunciation" but the thing about rp is that no one ever has a pure standard english accent anyway. now, this is going to be high specific, but!
take received pronunciation as the base, then make it softly yorkshire - but with an irish inflection on certain words that she learned from her aunt lisa
#answering asks#anon asks#does this make sense to anyone who isn't me#anyway to elaborate a little#ik didn't start speaking until quite a bit later than most kids do and even then it was only with her dad#zhao of course mainly conversed with her in mandarin plus he had a heavy accent when speaking english#subsequently a very young ik also had an accent which he thought would be difficult for other kids to understand#so he tried to make it so she'd learn rp using tapes at the library and such#hence her basic accent being standard english#but they live in the yorkshire area which of course crept into it#and then the irish from aunt lisa is self-explanatory#(ik can subsequently do a perfect very strong yorkshire accent)
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