#obviously idk if the actor has that kind of hair but.

[notemily]

who's on team MAL SHOULD GROW HIS HAIR OUT with me

1.01 A Searing Burst of Light 2.01 No Shelter But Me

[kookidough]

analysing vance hopper because he lives in my head 24/7 !

tw for like. literally everything the black phone covers!!!!!!

also there's some special effects gore rather far down in the post idk just i feel like i should warn you just in case

okay so before anyones like "but bee!!!! he only had 6 minutes of screen time in a 102 minute long movie!!!!! he was only on screen for 5.8% of the movie!!!!!" and to that i say i Know it was a real tragedy so a lot of this will be built on personal interpretation and subtext and stuff said behind the scenes and whatnot

so firstly i wanna rot about what his childhood/upbringing might've been like..... i havent quite decided on something definitive but i think we can take one look at his character and realise that is glaringly obvious he had a bad childhood, in one interview the actor that plays him (brady hepner) says "the background i had set up for vance is that the reason he was the way he was is his home life was fairly difficult, you know maybe his dad was either not there for him or he wasn't supportive, maybe he was fairly abusive, and so that creates a hair trigger sense of rage in vance" hair trigger meaning his patience is literally as thin as a strand of hair it does Not take a lot for him to snap

there more to it after that which i'll get into soon but yea thats the gist of it it's clear he had absent/neglectful/abusive parents and that would certainly contribute to why he's so angry all the time, maybe acting so explosive was the only way to get his parents' attention, either good or bad, so he just internalised that. obviously rage and anger issues like vance's lead to violence (not in all cases but in his case it does) and i think a neglectful and abusive upbringing would obviously expose him to more violence than a normal childhood would, therefore normalising it and desensitising him to it, whether he's seeing it play out in his own home and/or on television or something like that (because i doubt his parents would be the kind to monitor what content he's viewing)

i feel like he has little control over his life and that only adds to his anger, which in his case leads to a fight when his buttons are pushed too many times. i think he probably takes great pride in being the toughest in town and whatnot and winning fights and being perceived as strong and scary is good to him and helps him regain control/power, something he doesnt have at home. the rest of the quote from the interview i mentioned earlier states "this pinball machine could have been the only thing that he has in his heart that's like, good, like 'holy cow i did this, i set the score,' so when someone comes along and messes it up for him, it takes away the only thing that he has. i think that that's when he switches to a 'now you're gonna pay for that'"

similar to what i said about fighting, the pinball machine and his high score is something he has control over and its an important part of his reputation/image like. hes literally pinball vance ! and the whole thing about that high score being the "only thing he has in his heart that's good" implies that hes. well. pretty shit at everything else, which is pretty much canon if you remember that gwen said vance was held back twice in school. makes me think that while he's not the brightest in school he's certainly street smart

moving onto ermmmmm him getting kidnapped era because im sure youre wondering "well bee if he's so street smart then why did he get kidnapped" so may i raise two theories (this is. literally all i got and its not even concrete, me and my friend gray (@staggersz) tried to figure out how this could even happen and this is the most plausible thing we've got. so shoutout to him real quick he has had to deal with me being unnormal about vance for like a year and a half thanks king couldnt have done all this without my rotting buddy)

so either he got taken by surprise (most likely option) or vance's trust was gained first via getting given quarters at the pinball machine and small talk and shit like that but this is unlikely because i feel like it'd take a loooooong time for someone like vance to trust a some random stranger adult man when he clearly has issues with trusting and respecting people older than him and people with authority (e.g. cops, his parents, or school officials) so yea being taken by surprise would probably be the most realistic option, i always see people on tiktok being like "how did the grabber kidnap vance hes so strong!!!!" dude its a 15 year old boy against like. a 45 year old man who's already claimed two lives its really not gonna be a fair fight here

before i get into the next part i wanna quickly address a theory i absolutely Hate and it is so easily disproven and that is the theory that vance is the grabber's son or is related to him in some other way and i see it Far too often on tiktok and i HATE it. from what ive seen this all stems from his dream sequence where he kicks open the fence to albert's house and, presumably, goes inside after being dropped off by the police after the grab n go fight. idk if some people just straight up didnt realise this but clearly in real life he is going to his Own House??? in the dream it's only albert's house because this is how he chooses to show gwen the house she's trying to find her brother in, the house that he himself was killed in??? i hate the theory i hate it sm

the dream sequence itself is interesting though as the ghosts seem to only be able to conjure up what theyve seen in real life (like how bruce can picture the outside of the house and show that to gwen but the house number is all flipped and not right beause he doesnt know it) so vance being able to picture the house and the number and the gate and every detail would imply that hes seen it before, but im going to explain that away as either he got out once before like with finney's failed escape attempt, or the house is most likely on the route he walks to school or the grab n go or something and he hasnt actually been there prior to being kidnapped

mini rant over now onto being kidnapped i guess, so i used the missing posters to try and estimate a timeline of how long each ghost boy would've been in the basement for (although the missing posters are notoriously unreliable for details such as looks/height/age/etc, the dates seem to all line up). so we know the order is griffin, billy, vance, bruce, robin, finney, right?? if we use the poster date then billy was taken on may 4th, 1976, a month and two days after griffin was taken (april 2nd 1976). vance was taken on september 23rd 1977, almost a full year later (stay with me im going somewhere with this), and after that bruce was taken on july 18th 1978, again almost a full year later

its established in the movie that the grabber stalks his victims before he takes them (canon because we literally see the van watching finney and gwen as they walk home from school early on in the movie) but we dont know how long he does this for since griffin/billy and robin/finney were taken such short distances apart and then the others were taken such long distances apart, also it's possible he could stalk his next victim while the previous one is still alive, etc etc lots of confusing factors, but if i've done the maths right then the absolute maximum time vance could've spent down there is 9 months and 25 days, or 298 days, so erm . let that sink in !

howeverrrr in the movie gwen states that vance went missing "last spring" and september is definitely not in spring, meaning he could've been down there for a year or even longer. an explanation or excuse i could think of for the movie and the missing poster saying different things (other than the missing posters being known for some areas being wildly inaccurate) is that maybe he was taken in spring but wasnt labelled as officially missing until september, when he was properly linked to griffin and billy's similar disappearances and the mysterious grabber? i can imagine it'd be very easy for law enforcement, especially in the 70s, to dismiss someone like vance as a runaway until they get solid evidence that he was taken. idk though thats just my personal excuse / angsty headcanon for the difference in information

not sure what exactly killed him but we do hear from vance himself that "he took his time with me" so it was probably blood loss from a variety of injuries, if we look at him in his ghost scenes we can see his hair is absolutely covered in blood which indicates head injury, he clearly has a broken nose and bruising around his eyes as a result of it, he has these deep cuts on his abdomen area (apologies for the image quality but i believe they're like. sfx pieces you would wear under clothing)

and he also has just like. minor bruising (like the fingerprints on his arm) and other random blood splatters on his face and neck (assuming the blood down his neck comes from wherever he was bleeding on his head) so Yeah overall very unpleasant way to die obviously

okay now the part thats actually in the movie and it only took me 13 paragraphs to get here: vance as a ghost!! first thing i wanna point out is appearance wise i just want to say that when he's a ghost he's missing his choker and that fact Pains me. anyway personality-wise i feel like being violently murdered has, understandably, kicked his rage up to like. the highest level it could possibly go. he's insanely snarky and downright rude to finney on the phone, showing no empathy to the fact that finney is literally in the exact situation he was in

i feel like the whole "this is the nightmare end of your pathetic little life" and "if you knew what you had coming, you'd be fucking terrified" thing is definitely to scare finney on purpose and to get him to do something, vance might as well have just told him he's never going home cuz thats how it came across LMAOO, it is startling though because vance is clearly speaking from experience, that he was literally fucking terrified, and he is warning finney in his own weird way

the thing i think sets vance apart from the other ghosts is that while he does help finney, he does it for a different reason than they do. the other ghosts want finney to escape, to get out, to be free, to live, but personally i dont think vance cares about that. the only thing he wants is for albert shaw to be dead, for someone to seek vengeance, to do what vance couldn't. vance doesn't care if it's bruce or robin or finney or whatever boy could've come after that, he doesnt care as long as that man gets what he deserves after what he put vance through, and i see this through the scene at the end of vance's call where finney thanks him for his help and vance says, and i quote, "helping you? this isn't about you, fuck him! and apologies for being repetitive but to me it just literally proves that to vance, this isnt about finney or his escape, its just about revenge

we dont get to find out what happens to the ghosts once the credits have rolled, and i dont think we quite know enough about tbp's version of ghosts to guess what theyre up to, but i have a few theories :3 maybe theyre no longer bound to those two houses and they can now go anywhere they want in town? or maybe since their shared goal of stopping albert has been achieved, the ghosts can finally pass on to whatever is waiting for them next. i dont think vance would be content to pass on that quickly or easily as anger lingers, but i hope he'd be able to let go of it eventually, and hey we might find out in the sequel. i pray it mentions him cuz i will just die if it doesnt

sometimes, ok thats a lie, frequently i think about an au where he survived or escaped or whatever but ohhhh boy this post is already a train wreck so that au would deserve its own essay of a post :3 if u actually genuinely read this far then Wtf thanks for reading the ramblings of an absolute madman, only pure delusion could get like 20 paragraphs about a guy with 6 minutes screentime but hey thats how i roll, thanks again to my pal gray for letting me rot and thank u to my other pal ana for also enduring all this rot

hope u enjoyed my interpretation of vance hopper im going to crawl in a hole now and probably brainrot some more, thanks again for ur time :3

[drop-the-curtain-123]

random school uniform customisations that could've been done in the AC live-action movies (imo)

ok so the assassination classroom live action movies have flaws. But I can't stop thinking about how visually, some ideas could have helped the goal of differentiating the cast, and showing their personalities a bit more.

Two things the movies, due to their shortened runtime, struggled to do otherwise.

BUT.

(click on read more for my whole run-down on how I would've handled things!)

First of all, I understand keeping it all natural hair colors. That's a choice. Black haired Nagisa and Kayano, and maroon-haired Karma? I can live with that.

Why not take advantage of the fact some of the students DO have unnatural hair? As in, it's implied it's a dye that they consenciously do, notably as 'counter-culture', free spirits?

The blond hair on top of Terasakas' hair, along with Rio gyaru-bleach? Kurahashi's implied gradient hair, Maehara chapatsu orange-ish style, and Sugaya's grey bob?

It goes well with their characters too, and would've helped making them stand out!

Same with Ritsu! A norwegian AI moe girl is the perfect excuse for bright hair!

(while we're at it, if I could retcon another thing from the movie, it's making it so that an actual blasian actor is casted for Yoshida. But what can I do now...)

For the more broad uniform differences, I think it's a lost opportunity to not take advantage of the fact the actors have, well, a consistent costume on themselves.

Whearas in the manga format you'd need to keep track of everything by yourself and draw it over and over again.

Upper body customisations:

Okano could have had the tracksuit jacket we see her with in the extra episode, over her uniform. She would totally wear the matching sweatpants under her skirt.

It would've been fun to have Yada wear different scrunchies overtime, and wear the matching sweater! Maybe even a sleeveless one, could portray her sweet, preppy side well.

To tie in with her hair, Kurahashi too could have a nice, cute (tie-dye?) sweater! Maybe on the "fluffier" side?

Hazama could have had a simple black V neck sweater too. Maybe with a pocket on the chest that she pulls out small stuff from. IDK. Maybe a pen attached? A bookmark?

Kayano could wear tacky, pudding themed t-shirts under her blazer! For foreshadowing her link with someone, but also because it ties in with her persona...lity!

Okuda could've worn a lab-coat over her blazer, or even have it replace the blazer! Yeah, kind of on the nose, but it's a 2 hours movie set in a small set with 28 cast members.

Instead of the school-blaser, Kimura too could have worn a sports' hoodie?

There could have been a nod to various baseball stuff through Sugino wearing a specific jersey/jacket.

More! Baggy pockets cargo pants! As of canon, only Okajima, Chiba and Nagisa have them, but I believe it would fit Yoshida, maybe? Even others, I'm curious.

The state of the uniform and how it's worn could be telling too!

Someone like Takebayashi (who, apparently, is the only one to wear the vest, consisting the fullest uniform, along with Isogai!) and Kataoka have very ironed, proper uniforms, whilst Terasaka canonically wears his button-up days in a row.

Nagisa (who would have his pigtails!) also has a too-big uniform for his, showing his whole "isn't right in his skin" arc.

His canon design cuffs his pants, and he apparently had promised his mother he'd grow into it (the uniform) right?

True to her kogyaru/kogal style, Nakamura's skirt could be shorter. She did get sent to Class E partially because of breaking the dress code! (obviously, with the actress comfort taken into consideration)

I like Isogai and Maehara uniforms already, but I feel like for a live-action it needs to be exagerated a bit more.

Isogai's vest could be more visible with his blazer open, so that it differentiates him with Chiba, and also because it is a nod to his job as a waiter.

Maehara's sweater is a nice idea! I think he'd wear it a bit over-sized, and open, though. His tie is also not that tight. He also has trendy, but rather unpractical, shoes.

Maybe some hair stuff could be done too! Nothing drastic as to change totally the original character design, but maybe some headbands or hairpins?

Hara having matching looser socks (extrapolating from her design) and headbands (that could get her bangs out of the way when she does stuff) could be very cute.

Along with hair elastics on her wrist like Nagisa, ready to lend some to others!

Again, adding utility to a piece and building on its existence!

SOCKS!

Kurahashi could have cute legwarmers too.

There could be a diversity in color, length...

Kanzaki still has her iconic black tights, of course, but maybe she could have fancy shoes? Mary Janes? Something, both figuratively and literally, polished.

She could have one of those plastic black hairbands too, adding a little more visual interest to her otherwise pretty basic hair. It also is polished, and could represent the oppresive side of her family, literally weighting on top her. It also has a sort of shine and light to it, which also lines up with the whole "angel halo/madonna of the class" title.

While we're onto footwear...

Shoes! You can NOT tell me Muramatsu isn't a sneakers' fan (sneakerhead?)! (unintentionally inspired that headcanon list)

Terasaka and his middle aged dad-style slippers for the win! I love them. Pantoufles de daron, as we say in my corner of the world.

Mimura canonically has white shoes that kind of denote from others, that'd be a nice touch too. (he also could wear his "directors' style" sweater over his shoulders like in some extra content!)

He also can have his belt too! It can add visual interest, as always!

The bags could be a fun touch too. They're all the same, sure, but social butter flies or passionate souls could have a bunch of charms (or merch!) added to it.

Some could be frumpy, stained, doodled on, emboidered, or filled to the brim...

SPECIAL CASES:

An anticonformist (not that much by belief, but by absolutely not caring about living as anything less than their authentic self-expression) like Sugaya would definitely rock a skirt-over-pants style.

Or even just wear a painters' apron permanently! You don't know when you'll need to DIY some camouflage, or stain yourself any other way. The light grey would match the hair, too.

Now that I think about it, Fuwa might ditch the shoes for more average, comfy sneakers like Sugino, Kimura, and also do without the tie. It'd be a nice change to have a girl not wear it. Her socks could be easter eggs from other mangas, too?

I don't have everyone pinned down, mainly because I see them as rule-abiding students on that front (no blame on them).

Chiba, Hayami, etc. would wear their uniforms to a T, I believe, just like in canon.

Chiba is really, really glad he has the cargo pants though. His punk side could show in a couple adjustements, like ditching the blaze

Feel free to tell me your ideas! I'm just throwing my two cents here about a years-old movie. I'm always willing to learn more!

[fantasticalleigh]

season 3 part one thoughts:

ok ok i did finish B S3 pt. I and it's GOOD and i was really happy with it but now that my pulse has gone back to normal i'm realizing i have a lot of nitpicks/concerns with the storytelling but ngl the carriage scene was fucking BONKERS and my mind will be in the gutter for the rest of the weekend

MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW!!! bc i have a ton of thoughts on season 3 so far and have to get them out:

THOUGHTS:::::

-i could not stop smiling. my face hurts still.

-i don't get people whining about colin and the threesome. when the brothel threesome scene was leaked people were losing their goddamn minds about colin not being a virgin on reddit. y'all. he spent a LONG time traveling solo around europe--did you really expect him not to experiment the entire time? the fixation on this was kinda weird i gotta say. also i really liked that in the second brothel instance it served as growth to show colin was realizing it wasn't those women he wanted to have sex with, but penelope.

it seems every bridgerton lad needs a whoring about subplot in their respective season and colin was obviously going to get one if his elder brothers did, so i wasn't surprised at all. i thought the scenes were hot, personally. overconfident and super flirty col galavanting everywhere suddenly being reduced to a pining, thirsty af insecure boy was so gratifying to watch and those scenes had a hand in showing us that.

-i hate portia's costumes this season. hate. hate. hate. she looks like she was ripped right out of DIsney's Descendants set from the costume rejects pile. woof. she was stunning in s1 but s2 were her best looks and now she looks awful. why???

-i think the mondriches are ok and i like them but their story did not need expanding here. i'm happy for them but that storyline was boring and time taken away from more important characters. i know this sounds harsh but this season was already packed with storylines. across these four episodes there was a severe lack of Lady Danbury. one of my favorite aspects of Romancing Mr. Bridgerton was her friendship/mentorship with Penelope. that instantly made her one of my favorite characters. why not keep that in the show??? i'm so disappointed but with part 2 yet unreleased maybe it will still come?

-speaking of lady danbury, something about the way her brother is presented and how she treats him makes me worry for Violet, that he might disappoint her later. idk it's just a vibe i get.

-Luke's acting is fucking incredible. all the microexpressions and the lingering stares and subtle movements. nicola is a great actor in her own right but fucking hell, every time Luke teared up on screen I was mirroring him.

the carriage scene, when he's on his knees in front of Pen and she cups the side of his head and his eyes do THAT thing and the look he gives her? i rewatched that two second bit on repeat for a minute. amazing. (that's exactly the kind of devotion i picture when I wrote dark Dramione in TEOAL towards the end)

-we get it, benedict is a slut. he fucks. i'm over it. i'm not interested in who he's fucking. i know the consensus is Lady Tilley will somehow tie in to Sophie but i just do not care about Benedict rn. he is pulling focus.

-hyacinth's actress is so stunning! all the actors are obvs but every time i look at her i see Brooke Shields. anyone else?

-i had higher hopes for Lord Debling. genuinely kind of disappointed. he's boring and feels fickle. also the abruptness of him going 'i need a wife to tend to my estate so i can go travel for 3 years so be warned that i can't love you' to 'you have feelings for another man? i'm done-zo.' like what. you just said you can't love her and will never be at home with her but it's a fucking problem that she likes someone else? even though she's is clearly willing to get over it by marrying you??? bro. bro.

-hate what they did with Colin's hair for most of his scenes. why flatten it all out and take out the adorable curls he had in the first episode????????????????? episode one hairstyle was god-tier. everything after that makes him look like he's wearing a bad and stiff wig. still hot tho. also on the hair note: please stop giving eloise bangs. please.

-people on reddit were near to rioting when they learned Kanthony was only in the first ep due to leaks. i was bummed but ultimately don't mind it. did we deserve to see more of them thanks to how badly s2 was handled?? absolutely. but if it's only sex scenes bc they're now trying for babies then i'm good for now. also glad that edwina and mary don't come back bc ngl they pissed me tf off in s2 thanks to how badly they were written. plus like i said, this season has FAR too many subplots to keep them in. the writers really should have trimmed things down. violet meeting Lady D's brother was also not necessary imo.

-i went from loathing cressida to actively sympathizing and rooting for her to snatch up debling in the latter half. well done, writers.

-all the featherington scenes were gold. pru and phillipa are incredible when in scenes together and i'm so glad we got more of that. albion finch is a treasure, too. i really think they should have spent more time on penelope and her mother's relationship bc it's a big part of the book with how portia assigned pen to be her caretaker for when she got old and that being pen's burden/reason to want to bug out and marry rather than stay with her abusive mother, not her sisters' heirs taking charge of the house. they leaned too much into the comedy with the featheringtons and forgot to remind us why penelope is so miserable at home too--the problem stems from her mother, too, not only her sisters. we got two tiny clips of that and that was it. not enough to really establish that. the featheringtons are funny yes but they are not good people (sans Pen). Portia is neglectful and rude and dismissive toward Pen and there is not enough of that so far.

-i haven't read fran's book yet so had no idea what to expect and thought i'd be bored. she is adorable and i'm rooting for her. i like john better than the other guy. but i'm not that invested in her plot. i have no true emotional attachment to her. she needed her own season or to be pushed back to s4.

-still don't like eloise but i'm warming to her. a third season straight of her being condescending to almost everyone outside of her family/friends does nothing to endear her to me. she still blames Whistledown for "ruining" her when she ruined herself by ignoring everyone's warnings and running around town doing socially unacceptable things. she still has a right to be upset with Whistledown/Pen but she needs to take accountability for her own shit. but her understanding and patience with cressida was really surprising and i liked that a lot so far. i can see why people are shipping them now!

-HOW HAVE PENELOPE AND COLIN NOT EVEN DANCED ONCE YET WHAT THE FUCK jk i'm sure we'll obvs get that in part 2 but i'm so accustomed to them having a dance in one of the first few episodes that this truly threw me.

-colin's wet dream. loved it. ngl i was fully expecting a masturbation scene in his bed and not only bc i wrote one into my fic lmao

-i fucking called it from the start that the first kiss would be in the featherington garden based off that screengrab. everything about it screamed romeo+juliet. that was my favorite scene so far it was so beautifully shot and the way he goes for the lightest kiss at first and then hesitates and then GOES BACK FOR MORE???? when he realizes he's super into it???? i collapsed. i fucking squee'd like it was 2003.

-i've been complaining on reddit that the makeup in the promos was fucking awful and way too heavy. it comes across much lighter in the final product/show and i'm so relieved because i was truly worried about that. nicola is a stunning stunning woman and i can't help but admire her every time she is on screen and the awful makeup they put on her for those promos were overtaking her face.

-two major changes i truly appreciate (bc i'm normally very critical about shondaland's writing)

1: the journal scene. i loved that colin had pen hide in his study. i really wanted them to get caught there. i love that the journal fight wasn't as huge as it was in the book because the book made it go on for too long and colin was unreasonably mad about it. i'm so glad it was a minor thing here and that they still showed that colin was really pleased when pen praised his writing and he said he'd consider letting her read more and left it at that.

2: the carriage proposal. my biggest issue with the book bc colin was borderline abusive when he pulled her out of the carriage and made her fall. hated that so i'm glad here he was pleased and still mischievous and held out his hand for her and proposed and wasn't rude and impatient like he was in the book. also the carriage scene was hot as hell and i did not fucking expect colin to fucking finger her right then and there with the goddamned WINDOWS OPEN. tbh i was expecting boob action like in the book but that was a surprising change.

-pacing. too many storylines makes for a too-quickly paced episode. i feel like we were catapulted into everything and my head was spinning. this is a show that, because it insists on such a large fucking cast, would immensely benefit from a 12 or even 20 episode run rather than eight. but we know netflix is a cheap bitch so that will never happen and shows this dense suffer for it.

-music. i do not care about covers. i just don't. it makes no difference to me who is added to the soundtrack or the easter egg hunt of finding which song was used in which scene. the original scores made for the show are beautiful on their own and don't distract like the covers do and that's all i'll say.

-already seeing reviews online from people complaining polin have no chemistry??? idk what show they're watching but it ain't this one. this has been a slow slow buildup and if you can't feel their chemistry then idk what to tell you bc it is there. (and this is gonna be a hot take and unpopular opinion but personally out of all the main couples so far i found daphne and simon's chemistry to feel really forced and kind of cringey so take my opinion as you will but pen and colin have LEAGUES more chemistry as friends to lovers here)

BUT: one could also blame this on the awful pacing of these first four episodes so far. it really would have been nice to have more filler time of col and pen doing the flirting lessons since that was cut too short too soon.

phew--.

i will most definitely have more to say later on but these are my immediate thoughts and i had to get them all down . if you got this far down then bless you and thanks for listening and lmk your thoughts! i'm dying to talk about this.

[thecrystalkid]

what is your opinion on the tdc Netflix show?

i haven’t posted in a billion years but HII thanks for the ask!!!

it’s been a hot minute since i’ve rewatched the show, so it’s far from being fresh in my mind, and i’m of course not an expert on it. all the same, i still have a lot of thoughts and opinions* on it (*some of these might be a lil controversial as far as the TDCAOR fandom goes but i’m not trying to attack or criticize anyone for enjoying anything in this show, go in peace, ily❤️)

the show itself

to be honest, AOR has never been my favorite installment in the TDC franchise. i’m very attached to the original movie and jen and kira, so i think the obvious absence of them in the show may have played a part in that

but this^^ has nothing to do with the fact that the show is an objective masterpiece of artistry. it’s overwhelming how immersive and beautiful every inch of the environment is within thra, and whatever the creative team and everyone involved with the making of the show were paid, it’s not enough.

the design and craft of the gelfling is another thing i’m obsessed with, i loved the distinctive fashion and presentation of every clan (especially drenchen i love u drenchen) and just the sheer quality of every individual puppet. there’s something so uncanny and beautiful about the realistic skin, hair, and eyes of the gelfling, each one is so mesmerizing to watch.

sadly, i’ve always kind of disliked the overall voice-acting of the show. i love taron egerton, anya taylor-joy, etc. as much as the next person, but personally, their voices seemed so detached from their characters, which i think could be partially attributed to the fact that several of the actors are not professional voice actors

i’m beating the very dead horse here but i’m never not devastated that the show was cancelled when it was. it may not have been my favorite installment in TDC but not knowing what ultimately became of deet haunts me forever and always

not a day goes by that i’m not sad that lisa maxwell (kira’s voice actor) didn’t do the opening narration for the show. i didn’t even know that was a possibility until i listened to a podcast episode about it and found out lisa was originally going to do it. i still love sigourney weaver but like come on.

characters n in-universe stuff

one thing i love about the show is how many sibling relationships it explores. as someone with older sisters i obviously am a sucker for the dynamic between brea, tavra, and seladon. i always love seeing an absolute gutpunch soul-crushing diabolical sister relationship in media, the mirroring each other, bringing out the best and worst of each other, i love it it’s terrible. also gurjin and naia, i’m also a sucker for comedic siblings

i really really hate to say it but i’m not a fan of rian and deet as a romantic pairing. i just never really felt any chemistry between the two of them, and the fact that their whole thing started so shortly after the death of mira has always personally rubbed me the wrong way. obviously i’m not here to beat up stonegrot enjoyers, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with the pairing or people who enjoy it, it’s just not for me. i love and am happy for stonegrot folk, god bless <3

augh you know what pairing i do like though is brea and kylan, this whole post could be about them. idk, i know it’s one of those things where they barely have any interaction with each other but i always die at kylan’s little “and brea!” when they’re rescuing them all, and i would’ve DIED for an interaction between them where they discover they both can read

i do also really love how the show explored the skeksis and mystics being two halves of the same whole, and how that relationship can differ. it’s one of the most interesting concepts from the og movie and i’m glad it was expanded upon

i’m sure this may have been being saved for a possible continuation of the show but i would’ve loved a deeper look at each individual gelfling clan, like a really detailed thorough episode(s) about the life/history of each clan (dousan especially i feel like they were skimped on the most)

i, like many, am obsessed with aughra, and i love that she played such a major role in the show. i love how they showcased her maternal role and connection to the gelfling and thra, whilst always keeping her stern, choppy personality present

this is just my conspiracy theory but on the subject of who jen and kira’s respective parents are, i choose to imagine it’s not anyone in the AOR cast and just some other gelfling we never/haven’t met

wow that was a lot of yapping but again thanks for the ask!! i love being able to just dump all my thoughts into one place, it’s always very fun! 

[mercyedes]

What caught your eye about hambone? First I thought he was silly bc of the gold teeth but I learned more about the real hambone and I love him sm!! <3 the actor is so beautiful

my first watch of mota when he showed up in ep 1 & the end of ep 2, i recognized him as "wtf this dude has gold teeth oh he's defo a fuck boy" but didn't think much of ham LMAOOO i was still madlyyyy obsessed w/ buck and crosby i didn't have time for my eyes to wander <3

wait hold on i wrote way more than i thought i would lemme read more. i love hambone. he is everything to me

and then like episode 5 came around and i kept rewatching the first couple of episodes and i should've known better because i KNEW he was (is) fine as fuck i simply could not ignore it any longer. i always love the off-putting pretty bitches and hambone is exactly that, an off-putting pretty bitch. i was endeared by his bright ass blonde hair because it reminds me A LOT of an f1/f2 driver i love (liam lawson) so i feel like i kinda was set up from the beginning to be partial to this tall blonde pretty boy 😩💜

AND JUST LIKE YOU when i decided i was way too curious and enamored to ignore hammy's existence any longer, i just started researching more about real ham and just fell in love with brady's crew in general and found hammy so interesting and cool -- there is a part in a wing and a prayer where crosby writes about how hambone (unlike harry) genuinely wanted to get to the war and during training he was worried the war would already be won and over before he got the chance to go fight in it. and another member of brady's crew wrote in a journal he kept about how, while they were still in the U.S., all of brady's crew agreed with one another that they didn't wish to fight for the honor and medals of it all, they just wanted to go do their jobs, help return the world to something peaceful, and then go home. we love humble kings. anyway this is a side note but i'm ngl i feel like sometimes people in the fandom kinda mischaracterize/"Fanon"-ize hambone a lot and it sometimes rubs me the wrong way. but that's just me

obviously he probably still counts as a minor character in MOTA, but idk i love the character jordan still portrayed, he's a lil weirdo and a little silly with his gold teeth of course, but i fully love the bits of personality we got from him <33 he's a funny, witty boy with pride and confidence about his job (bombardiers r so hot it's just true. they are sexy af being competent) but also stubborn and a little aloof and easily irritable, doesn't seem to be all too bothered by being overly kind to people he doesn't know/we often only see him socializing with people from brady, crank, or blakely's crews (all men who irl hambone shared barracks with and had close ties to !) ... i love a dude who keeps to himself / doesn't feel the desire to step too far outside of his close social circle, it makes him even more intimidating imo and i love it. he's so hot. he's like a cryptid to me and i find his freaky vibes insanely alluring. like even the cat killing CANNOT put me off, if anything it made him sexier idk why .... like he's a lil vicious yes but he's also a resourceful bastard like that, like brady said protein is protein & hambone was very kind to his buddies to make them cat soup <3

ALSO he's just very very fun to write. i adore writing him he's so interesting.

[next-autopsy]

A/N: Well, hi there! Okay so Joe needs to apologise asap! This is his attempt I guess… idk what’s happening anymore man

Based on the actors portrayal/hbo show and written with no disrespect to the real life veterans. Also all images found on Pinterest.

TW: I don’t think there are any…

Tags: @malarkgirlypop, @panzershrike-pretz

Made of Glass

Chapter nineteen: An Itchy, Army Issued Blanket 

Their barracks were dark and quiet when the ladies returned. Charlotte was all but dragged to her bed by Connie and Betty, who then immediately started getting ready to pass out on their own cots.

Lucy and Blythe were inseparable, snuggling together on a bed too small for the two of them, by now all the women had noticed the lovey dovey behaviour between them. No one said anything, no one minded. 

Bernadette had spent the entire cab ride sniffling and wiping at her face where stray tears fell. No one had mentioned what had happened with Liebgott, though all of them witnessed it, except Charlotte who was in a world of her own and wouldn’t remember anything from this night. 

She changed her clothes and brushed out her hair, too tired to walk to the bathroom and finish her nighttime ritual. Before Birdie could climb under the covers of her awaiting bed, Frankie made eye contact with her. She shook her half empty pack of smokes at the mousy haired girl and flicked her head toward the door, a silent invitation. 

Bernadette sighed and joined the Italian woman outside. She might feel better if she spoke about what happened. She hadn’t quite figured out why his words got to her so badly, perhaps talking to Francesca could help. They sat on the wooden steps as they usually did. Rossi lit a cigarette and passed it to her friend, then lit her own. 

Francesca wouldn’t push, of course she wanted to know exactly what was said and what tone was used, but she wanted to avoid more tears if possible. Seeing Birdie quietly crying and then trying to pretend everything was okay, upset her more than she cared to admit. 

“I don’t know why I cried.” Her words were void of emotion. Frankie only hummed in response, waiting for her to share what was on her mind. 

“He’s always been kind of mean. I thought he actually hated me…. But then something changed.” Frankie was more than curious, she thought back to the uncomfortable night she watched from the shadows. Rossi liked people watching, she picked up on hidden feelings or underlying vibes easily. Whatever had or hadn't happened between Birdie and Liebgott perplexed her. And apparently, she wasn’t the only one.

“Joe was really… I-I thought maybe, just maybe we could've been friends.” 

“But?” Francesca prompted, eager to hear more of this odd dynamic. 

“But, he thinks I'm the worst.” The words cracked as the downcast woman spoke them, her eyes focused on the floor, her shoulders sagged in defeat, even her bottom lip protruded in a pout. 

“I’m sure that's not true…” The older woman consoled. Bernadette was sweet and witty and an oddly likeable person. Francesca had specifically tried not to make friends with anyone but Birdie managed to wiggle her way into her heart and now she couldn’t imagine not being friends with the little firecracker. 

“No, it is. The words he used were: Arrogant, conceited bitch.” She didn’t even have one second to feel sorry for herself as Frankie instantly counter argued. 

“Ha. You are the least arrogant, conceited person I've ever met. And you're definitely not a bitch.” 

“Not according to him.” Now she was sulking, pouting and feeling sorry for herself. The attitude change was phenomenal. From Francesca’s perspective, Birdie had always been confident. Not overly but enough to tough it out with her self righteous Captain. 

“Why do you care what he thinks of you?” Maybe Rossi would have to give the poor girl some hints, she obviously hasn't picked up on her own feelings for the man who bullied her. It would explain her need for his approval and why his comments affected her the way they did. 

“I-” She couldn’t answer, she didn’t know how. Why did she care so much about what Joseph Liebgott thought of her?  “Because, I- I don’t know.”

“I think I do.” She would have to tell the southern girl, it was her duty as best friend. She couldn’t let her go on like this, it was down right embarrassing. 

“Enlighten me.” 

“You like him.” The George company woman spoke plainly, no point sugarcoating it. 

“What? No, you're way off, he’s so- But he’s- He is a pigheaded jerk. I-I don't like him.” Birdie spluttered, stumbling over her words and giving Frankie an incredulous look. 

“Are you trying to convince me, or yourself? Either way, I don't think it's working.” She paused to let the words sink in, “Come on, you need some sleep.” 

————————

Letting go of Birdie’s arm and watching her walk out the door, surrounded by her girlfriends, caused a pang in Joe’s chest. 

He was at fault and he knew it. Joe didn’t mean the harsh words and he shouldn’t have said those things about her, whether she was listening or not. And now, he sat at the bar, gulping down whatever alcohol came his way. 

“Liebgott?” No answer, he preferred to mope in peace. But Tipper wouldn’t sit by and watch his friend beat himself up over a girl, especially because he had money on the two getting together before they were deployed.

“She’ll come round.” Ed wasn’t really sure what else he could say to soothe the situation. But he had noticed the girl in question harboured feelings for his brooding friend, and he definitely knew Joe felt some type of way about Birdie. 

The issue was getting them to recognise their own fondness of each other and stop messing up. It was like the pair were stuck in blatant denial, not even considering the reason why they were always so drawn to one another, constantly needing to make comments to gain the others attention. To Ed it was transparent, which is why he was so confident about the running bet in Easy company, Joe and Birdie; Will they? Won’t they? 

“I think she hates me now.” 

“What? She didn’t before?” Tip was trying to lighten the mood, but Joe wasn’t having it. He continued to feel sorry for himself, drinking yet another pale yellow beer.

“No… I don't know- she was, we were... It doesn’t matter now.” The alcohol was affecting him, he couldn’t think straight and his words came out as incoherent mumble.

“You should apologise.” 

“You think I don't know that?” Joe’s snark was intact regardless of how much he drank. 

“Hey, I’m just saying.” Ed paused, “If you made a meaningful gesture… something only known between you two…” He trailed off, letting Joe put the rest of the thought together in his mind. 

“Yeah? Like what? In case you didn’t notice, we don't exactly have the best track record.” Liebgott was mad, not at his friend, just in general or at himself. His patience with Tipper’s chit chat was running thin. 

“Well, what do you have?” 

—------------------

While weekend passes were more common now than back in Toccoa, they were still highly sought after. Joe had a plan to smooth over the mishap with Bernadette and it meant spending a precious pass at the library reading, instead of getting shitfaced at a bar. 

He prayed it would work, that Bernadette would forgive him and let his unkind words fade away. Joe had already decided on a place and time and now he needed to convince one of her friends to bring her to the spot. She probably wouldn’t meet him there if he asked, so he’d have to be sneaky. 

Approaching Francesca Rossi was intimidating. She had a reputation of not taking shit from anyone and Joe had hurt seemingly her only friend. Plus, Birdie most likely told the Italian woman about his colossal fuck up, so he doubted she would be on his side. 

“What do you want?” Her eyes narrowed at the man walking toward her.

“I was hoping you would help me with something.” Joe knew he had to be straightforward with the George company woman, put his cards on the table and hope for the best.

“Why?” She hadn’t stopped glaring.

“Look, I’ll be honest. I fucked up, with Birdie. I said some things I’d rather not repeat… And I’m just trying to apologise.” 

“What do you need?” He hadn’t expected it to be that easy, so he stood still for a moment processing, before he explained his plan to her. It felt dumb to say it out loud, but when Rossi gave him a nod and a half smile, promising to do her part, he thought: maybe he was doing the right thing.

“One thing before you go…” Francesca called out to him as he turned to leave, he stopped and looked at the woman over her shoulder.

“Yeah?” 

“You hurt her again…. I will kill you.” There was no hint of a joke in her tone, no curve of her lips. She meant it and she wanted him to know she would follow through. Birdie meant alot to her, she didn’t have many women friends so she would hold onto the southerner for the rest of her life, kill for her, die for her if necessary. 

“I know you will.” 

“Good.”

—----------------

The night came. Joe was nervous. He told himself it was due to all the facts he had to memorise and his anxiety was about messing up in front of an expert. 

Something in the back of his head said her name and the idea of his nerves coming from his need to impress this specific woman ran through his brain. Maybe it was a little bit about Bernadette, but he couldn’t dwell on it too much. He had places to be and apologies to set up. 

—--------------------

Francesca was good at keeping secrets and hiding things. So when the time came, Birdie suspected nothing. Frankie told her friend she needed her help with something and led her outside and into the dark with no explanation. Birdie didn’t question it, Francesca wouldn’t steer her wrong, she trusted the woman with everything she had.

After a few minutes of walking, the two women came upon a clearing with an olive green, Army issued blanket laid down upon the grass. A gas lantern lit up the immediate area.

Just as Bernadette began to wonder what was going on, Liebgott came into view, stepping into the light that shone from the source on the floor. Birdie’s jaw hung, she looked between the man and her friend who had brought her here, feeling somewhat betrayed. 

“Frankie? What the hell?” Were the words she finally managed to get out. 

“You got two options, Birdie. Stay here and hear him out… or we walk away. I’ll punch him in the throat too, if you want.” All three of them considered the words carefully. 

“Fair.” Joe shrugged, knowing he deserved it. 

Francesca eyed the younger woman as she pondered her options. She knew the outcome, it was plain to see which one Birdie would go for, the look on her face said it all.

She was curious, Joe intrigued her beyond words and even though he had said some things that hurt Birdie, she still craved his attention, to be around him, to listen to whatever he was about to say. 

Bernadette didn’t have to say it, she just gave Frankie a look and the black hair woman was on her way, not before shooting Liebgott a stern glare. 

“I didn’t mean it.” Joe broke the silence that was growing between the two. 

“But you still said it.” She couldn’t let him get away that easy. 

“I know… I shouldn’t’ve. I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” 

“Well, don’t let me stop you.” Birdie had already decided she’d forgive him but she wanted to drag it out, see him sweat. She knew first hand how scary Frankie could be, the fact that he had talked her into this project of his was apology enough in her books. 

“I am so sorry, Birdie.” His words were genuine, he truly was sorry. He would have said it a hundred more times if she wanted him too. His pride aside, he wanted her to know it. Talking about her like that was not something that would be repeated. Hurting her had hurt him, maybe Tipper was right, maybe his feelings for her ran deeper than he thought. 

He wanted to be her friend of course, she was always so smiley and happy, it was easy to get along with her. Joe enjoyed his time around her, even before, when all the words they said to each other were dipped in sarcasm. He actually enjoyed the witty comebacks she came up with, he liked that she wouldn’t let anyone walk over her. She always had something to say and he found himself wanting to listen more and more as time went on. 

“What’s that for?” Birdie nodded her head to the blanket, trying to steer away from acknowledging the apology. 

“Huh? Oh..” Lieb looked behind him, “Come here, sit. I want to show you something.” He sat and patted the empty space next to him. Birdie followed instruction and lowered herself onto the itchy blanket. 

Joe leaned back, propping himself up with one arm and pointing skyward with the other. Birdie copied his stance, turning her chin up and watching where he pointed to. 

“See that? That’s the Little Dipper-“ Birdie’s attention was pulled from the stars above them and to the guy casually dropping constellation names. 

“Wait… it actually is… how did you know that?” She imagined Joe, head in a book, studying star clusters so he would have something to talk to her about and it made her stomach flip. Had he really done something like that for her? She was vaguely aware that he didn’t care for studying or reading novels, so if he had done that it was solely for her benefit. 

Lieb let his arm drop, turning his head to face her. The eye contact made Birdie want to twirl a strand of hair with her fingers and giggle like a schoolgirl- Damn, maybe Francesca had been right about her liking Joseph Liebgott. 

“Magic.” His face was stoic and serious as he whispered the word to her, like it was a secret. Then, his infamous smirk broke onto his face and Bernadette couldn’t help but grin back at him, the butterflies in her tummy were going crazy, but she tried to play it cool. 

“Ah okay. I see: This is your apology? Impressing me with your new found knowledge of the stars?” Said with feigned disinterest. Joe hadn’t stopped watching her, her mannerisms were endearing. Yes, he definitely wanted to be friends with this girl. 

“It depends.” He broke eye contact, attempting to give his heart a moment to catch up. 

“On what?” The country woman had completely forgotten about the twinkly lights above them, something else was far more interesting at this moment. 

“Is it impressing you?” 

It most definitely was. Joe pointed out several well known constellations and even gave a couple backstories. Birdie already knew everything he was telling her but she humoured him and listened with interest at the tales he told her. 

At one point the two lay down for a better view of the starry black sky. Their arms brushed up against one another and neither attempted to move away. They ignored the shared touch, pretending it wasn’t happening but the pair could feel exactly where their bodies met and they revealed in the warmth. 

A/N: does his apology suffice? I think stargazing is going to be a Birdie/Lieb thing from now on.

I love hearing from you guys, so please feel free to comment or dm me!

~ next-autopsy ~

Chapter twenty

[sanctuaryforthelost]

Do you have any movie recs that Negan actor is in like ones you really liked? I saw the one with living in Woodstock and I know I messaged you defending Jude 😬 and I liked it but I couldn't get into like some action movie he was in with Robert DeNiro. I just need more of this man now that I laid my eyes on him. I never got caught up on an older guy before I saw him.

Hi there!

Sorry I’m just getting back to you now! I did my best to come up with some titles that hit up different genres. This is a bit long so apologies in advance but I hope it helps.😊

If you like romantic comedies, you should give the Accidental Husband a try. A good thriller would be The Resident. Just an fyi, he’s not the best guy in either movie. And I’m not giving anything away by saying that, you can see just by looking at the trailers. The Possesion is a good scary movie…if you can get past his hair lol. Seriously, I love Jeffrey but his hair in that movie! 😬 I know you mentioned the action movie he did with Robert de Niro. Funny that’s one I haven’t seen yet but it’s been on my watchlist forever lol. There’s also The Losers It’s an action movie too. Idk if that’s not your thing or if you just didn’t like Robert de Niro movie but the Losers wasn’t bad. There’s a bunch of Marvel actors in it before they starred in anything from the MCU. The Watchmen was also good. If you like campy, 80s B movies or you just wanna see him in his first role, you can always watch Angel in Red. I’ve seen that movie way too many times! 🙈

He was also good in Grey’s Anatomy. I think that’s where a lot of people first fell for him. There’s also another show he was in called Magic City, that was pretty good. I usually like him with facial hair but I think he looks handsome in it. And obviously there’s The Walking Dead lol.

There’s some other movies I haven’t seen yet so hopefully I get around to them at some point. I do have to say that he’s one of those actors who even if they’re playing a bad guy, you kind of try to find some redeeming qualities in them….hes just so handsome and charming you can’t help it…just my opinion though.

Btw it’s so easy to fall for this man once you’ve seen him. He ages like a fine wine!

Hope this helps! Also, if anyone else has any recommendations, please feel free to add them in the comments. 😊

[charaunderwood]

Hello!

My turn now! Kingdom hearts for the fandom ask game! :)

alright bitches let's gooooo

my favorite female character

gotta give that to my girl Namine!! shes my second favorite in the series for the angsty tragic vibes. Incase you can't tell by the character I've based my entire blog off of I really enjoy those vibes lmao. also she has the best hair out of everyone (I tend to be a huge sucker for blondes and the hair over the shoulder is just really cool)

my favorite male character

cmon. do I even need to answer this one? At this current moment, Vanitas might just be the most important fictional character to me personally of all time. which is honestly kind of embarrassing to say considering on the surface he's literally an edgy version of the main character but just everything about him and his story hits me so hard in a way I can't even describe right now. so yeah. it's Vanitas.

my favorite book/season/etc

like you said, since this is a game series I'll just put my favorite game here. I've only ever actually beaten KH1 (I'll get to the rest eventually don't judge me-) and I think just looking at the rest of the series that would have to be my favorite gameplay wise, tho of course I still don't have the best grasp on that lmao. but then story wise by favorite would have to go to BBS. but then as a meddling of both gameplay and story I think my favorite would have to go to KH3 so....idk. one of those three depending on the day.

my favorite episode (if its a tv show)

obviously it's not a tv show but I think this would be a fun place to ask "what's your favorite world?" so i'm gonna do that instead. so if we're including all worlds in the series it would have to go to KH1 Hollow Bastion no contest, but if we only include Disney worlds, I think I would have to give that one to Symphony of Sorcery in DDD.

my favorite cast member

so i'm just gonna say my favorite voice actor for this one and i think i'd have to give that to Jesse McCartney for his work as Roxas and Ven. I think the voice he gives them suits their design perfectly and I adore hearing the slight distinction in their voices, with Roxas's having a bit of a harder edge while Ven's is slightly higher and softer, it just really works to highlight their different personalities despite looking the same. I also love the energy that Haley Joel Osment always brings to Sora and Vanitas (although DDD Sora can be a bit rough to listen to at times and KH3 Vantias is uh...quite the divisive performance lmao)

my favorite ship

gotta go Soriku for that one, their dynamic is just so well fleshed out and cute for me to NOT adore it. although I just wanna say here that I think the dynamic between Sora and Namine is really underrated and a romantic dynamic between the two of them filled with angst and apologizing and all that jazz could be really interesting if written well. or hell even just some more stuff focusing on their platonic dynamic. just more of them in general please.

a character I'd die defending

obvioulsy would pick Vanitas here as I think a lot of his actions, while horrible, are very forgivable and defendable when given the full context. also I defend Ven a lot since people very often say he's an incredibly boring character and while I completely understand that since I think a lot of his really interesting potential is very underexplored at this point I'm also like booo! hiss!! spray bottle!!!! stay away from my son >:(

a character I just can't sympathize with

Ansem the Wise and fully grown old man Xehanort for that one. while I do think that people give ATW shit a bit too often and blame him for stuff that he technically shouldn't be blamed for, he was still a massive racist dickhead that ruined the lives of so many people around him for his own selfish reasons. plus, like many others, I really didn't like how when he came back in KH3 he just accepted the apology Ienzo gave him even though Ienzo really shouldn't be taking blame for the stuff that happened when he was still a literal fucking child but, whatever I guess. I also just don't really like the fact that he comes back from being dead after KH2 at all but that's a whole other conversation

and then for Xehanort, I'm sorry but the things he experienced in DR do not in the slightest excuse the horrific stuff that he does in the current times. I understand that the things he and Eraqus when through in Dark Road were extremely traumatic and it is fine for them to still be haunted by those things even into their 80s, but for Xehanort to still be enacting on that trauma well after 60 years later, yeah that's just unacceptable. Even though he has some valid points he is still harming the lives of children for no good reason and is possibly trying to destroy the world which is obviously awful. and that's not even taking into account all the other bad shit he does like possibly torturing people like Subject X for his experiments during his time as an apprentice and him abusing both Ven and Vanitas physically and emotionally to "make them stronger." also just to be clear, I have a hard time empathizing with Eraqus as well since his trauma from DR also does not excuse the shit he pulled in BBS, but I at least respect his ability to own up to his mistakes before he dies and when he comes back in KH3, even if I still think its bullshit that he didn't give Terra any sort of apology. (sorry for how long that one was good lord)

a character I grew to love

this might surprise the people but I actually wasn't the number 1 Vanitas fan right from the start. crazy I know but when I was first getting into the series I just thought he was okay. one of the better villains but just mediocre otherwise. but then one day he just.....clicked with me, and I really couldn't tell you why. he just did and now he's my favorite son :)))

my anti otp

so besides the creepy and uh...not legal ones, i'd say a sort of shipping hot take of mine is that I don't really like any romantic pair among the sea salt trio. I really do understand the appeal Roxas and Xion in a romantic light (and I am usually also a SUCKER for a blonde and black haired pairing) but they're just so sibling coded for me that I just can't get behind it.

anyway thanks for the ask!! sorry I probably yapped more than I needed to lmao <3

[incomingalbatross]

Doctor Who fancast of LotR, current draft:

Bilbo: Patrick Troughton <3

Gandalf: Peter Capaldi (this is only partly on account of his eyebrows)

Frodo: Paul McGann. I'm VERY committed to this

Sam: ???

Merry: Ian Marter. He's a posh lad, our Merry

Pippin: Frazer Hines (who otherwise would be a shoo-in for Sam)

Lobelia: ?? Don't know but she deserves the best in terms of casting. Considering SJA-era Liz Sladen

Gildor, Farmer Maggot, Fatty: All ?? (Farmer Maggot MIGHT be John Levene. Might be Sylvester McCoy.)

Tom Bombadil: Colin Baker. Listen, I was very torn here because OBVIOUSLY Tom Baker has the correct energy, but Colin does too and I think he would have more fun with the little songs. Also I want to save Tom Baker's voice for someone else

Goldberry: Lalla Ward (...unfortunately another point for Tom as Tom)

Butterbur: ...I feel like there's an obvious choice but I don't have him

Aragorn: Nicholas Courtney, YES my Brigadier bias is showing through, but you know he could handle "running herd on the hobbits"

Glorfindel: Peter Davison

Elrond: Matt Smith. Listen I like this choice so much. Old and wise and the last of his kind!!

Arwen: ?? This just feels like a game of "which dark-haired DW actress do I declare the Most Beautiful," except they also need the correct Elvish Vibes. For the vibes especially, I'm considering Carole Ann Ford. But then there's Mary Tamm, who is properly Tall. idk.

Boromir: ???

Legolas: Peter Purves?? I can't even tell you why he just kinda seems to fit and that's the best I got.

Gimli: Michael Craze??? See above.

Galadriel: ?? Again, this should be easier. DW has so many good actresses. But I can't think of anyone who's quite right. Mary Tamm in a blonde wig? Jacqueline Hill ditto? Lalla Ward would be great if she were just taller, but I don't regret giving her Goldberry either.

Celeborn: ??

Eomer: David Tennant. Eomer has a good range of Big Emotions, which I feel is important when casting David Tennant. (And yes I'm waiving the hair color here too.)

Treebeard: Tom Baker. THIS is what I was saving his voice for. You get it right??

Quickbeam: ??

Theoden: William Hartnell. <3 This one is very important to me.

Eowyn: Karen Gillian. Listen. She could DO it. (Also this makes both siblings Scottish, which amuses me.)

Grima: ??

Saruman: Jon Pertwee. I wanted him for Denethor too, but if I have to choose... Saruman.

Gollum: ?? Casting anyone as Gollum just feels mean.

Faramir: Hnggggh... I am considering both William Russell (Ian bias) and Arthur Darvill (to be opposite Karen Gillian but also he likes cool parts with gravitas). I don't know.

Denethor: ?? All wizard-adjacent characters should be played by Doctors but I've used all the applicable Doctors. ...Anthony Ainley?

Beregond: ?? He FEELS like a John Levene character but John Levene also feels like he really should be a hobbit. I am considering Duggan's actor on the grounds that he's also an everyman

Bergil: ?? I don't have any child actors on hand

Halbrand: ??

Elladan and Elrohir: ??

Prince of Dol Amroth: Okay actually THIS is William Russell

Ioreth: Catherine Tate I think

The Master of the Houses of Healing: pick any half-decent Time Lord, they'll fit the bill :P

Farmer Cotton: ??

Rosie Cotton: Either Anneke Wills or Katy Manning, probably. Or maybe Jenna Coleman.

[sleepboysummer]

just a hypothesis .. maybe the reason constance is so underrated is because her most popular actor is the one in that cast with the most mature voice and looks, at least in the bootleg. its harder to really grasp the situation u know?? idk constance is one of my favorites but im kinda biased towards younger casts of her cause then it actually feels so real.

not to say that lillian isnt AMAZING cause she is but like it is obvious she is a full grown adult. in my opinon most of the other actors could pass for teenagers i think (at least onstage). emily also has a really mature face/voice but it makes sense for her character since yk. her head and voice probably isnt hers.

thats also why im so partial to gus halpers mischa is cause. he does pass for a senior. a very hot senior sure but the longer hair, his voice, the way he moves all contribute to him feeling younger. i really dont like most other mischa castings especially when theyve got like. full beards???? cause obviously it doesnt feel the same??? that is a man

idk i just really like this show when its done by actual highschool or college students cause then you can really understand that these are 17-18 year olds going through all this!!! and i think that ESPECIALLY applies to constance talking about her virginity cause she was so young and people kind of forget that.

[arunneronthird]

Hi, this is the Bruce and Jason anon again and you're completely right! Tim and Kon's situation is very different from Bruce and Jason's because Tim was like...literally trying to engineer a perfect replacement for someone he lost ON PURPOSE. Which is just completely fucking crazy from start to end. Especially when Kon, as a clone himself, struggled in the past with the idea of being created in a lab explicity to perfectly replace another person, then ending up not being identical/perfect enough to do that and having to learn to become his own person instead, not just superman 2.0. Like Tim was actually insane to still try and clone him while actively KNOWING all of this about his best friend and still deciding to go ahead and become the cadmus/lex luthor in this poor clone's story.

Also with the benefit of being able to actually know what happened while Jason was dead, how Bruce grieved, the whole messy process of how Tim actually became Robin, etc. through the comics, I agree that Bruce wasn't necessarily wrong. What I was mainly talking about was Jason coming back from the dead without any knowledge of how much of a wreck Bruce was when he was gone and seeing the product of that grief without any of the context.

Like Jason checks back in on his dad after maybe a year or two (idk comic timelines) and there is just a full ass new child (around the age jason was when he died no less) living in Jason's house, swinging round Gotham in Jason's old suit colours using Jason's vigilante name (the suit he died in, the name that he died for). He even LOOKS like Jason with his black hair a blue eyes. And because of the severe lack of context Talia provides, from the outside it's exactly as if Jason has been replaced, not grieved. Like when TV shows recast one of their main actors and the story continues on without stopping to acknowledge that anything is out of the ordinary. As if this new person has been here the entire time and the old one never existed at all.

Jason was also having problems with Bruce before he died so seeing this shiny new Robin take his place (and actually be good at it) is just so heartbreaking. Again, without knowing anything about Bruce and Tim's relationship, to Jason it'd seem like Bruce just got a shiny new sidekick that was Robin in all the ways B wanted and valued, all the ways Jason wasn't. It's worse when Dick, who Jason had a pretty strained relationship with, is all over the new guy in a way he never was with him. It mirrors what you were saying about Tim making the version of Kon that loved him in the way original-Kon didn't. Obviously not what happened to Bruce and Tim but WE know that not Jason

The third part doesn't really fit them so much, the only thing I can think of is Jason coming to the realisation that Bruce didn't actually care about him, or Dick, that he probably didn't even care about the new kid either. Like Tim and his clones, Robins all eventually get discarded and thrown away when they don't meet B's standards, when they're not perfect enough. It's what Bruce and Dick used to fight about all the time too, before Jason died. Has Steph been Robin yet by the time Jason comes back? Idk. It would certainly add to that idea. Child after child, in the middle of gun fight after gun fight. What kind of a monster does that? So Jason decides to put it to the test. How much does Bruce actually care about Robin? He certainly didn't seem to care when Jason died, but maybe that's too small of a sample size. There needs to be multiple test trials. If Batman thinks so little of his sidekicks, if he's really going to be so careless with them, then he should to be prepared to lose a few.

Sorry for how long this is, I was typing and completely lost the run of myself.

i... had like a page typed out and then the whole building lost power so i think thats a sign for me to stop answering while at work, i wont listen though

honestly im really glad that tumblr now shortens posts, but never apologize for length, i thought this was a great read and i love getting peoples opinions on things!

i agree with all this, really, i think jason, pumped full of green pit rage water, would come back and see himself replaced and completely snap, it works really well and i love that narrative

i dont think jason feels bad for losing robin, it wasnt his to lose, he wore dicks suit while tim wore a new one out of respect for him, i think he felt replaced in a... deeper level

he came back to see that someone was occupying the space the grief and pain would have been in, someone else was pushing his ghost away, living his life, being loved by his father, being cared for by his brother, someone better at his job than he ever was, cold and smart where he was rash and angry, he came back to see that he was not only replaced, him being dead made things better

ofc, this wasnt true, his death nearly destroyed bruce, and it took a lot of effort to get him to feel human again cause he had lost his son, but jason didnt know that, as u said

meanwhile, i love the new 52 tim, i think hes tragic in a visceral way, and i love how his pain is so easy to feel, but in a way im glad we dont really talk about that era too much and usually act like its not relevant to the canon cause... its hard to justify tim being a good person in the new comics after reading the 2015s one

like, tim failing to clone kon doesnt justify him actually trying to replace his dead best friend who struggled with his place in the world, and i think the writers recently realized if they want tim to be a dark but brave hero they cant also make him morally corrupt at best and absolutely insane, theres a difference between red robin desperately trying to find batman and being a rude mess in the process and red robin basically experimenting with lives

[thompsborn]

Which cast do you picture in the Homeward Bound universe? Id assumed it was tom holland’s peter because harley doesn’t exist in the other spidermen’s movies but I also know you’re a Garfield-Spidey fan and that Harry Osborn and Gwen haven’t been MCU’d—just out of curiosity!!

okay hi this is the first of my current EIGHT unanswered hb asks omg. i'm !!!!! actually shaking with excitement about the fact that i'm about to get to ramble SO MUCH about hb holy shit. okay. okay.

so, obviously harley is based off ty simpkins, but i kind of?? like i mean, yes ty literally plays harley lmao, but also i picture him SLIGHTLY differently in my head. like how he looks in endgame i feel is a different vibe than how ty looks irl. i don't know if that makes any sense at all but i can't explain it, it's just like. he looks like ty but to the left. that's harley in my head. i cannot describe it any other way.

hb peter is 100% tom's peter because homeward bound is 100% canon compliant up to no way home (except for some headcanons such as peter having an uncle ben but uncle ben dying when peter was still really little in order to not fuck with the spidey home trilogy being peter's origin story - there are some other headcanons too that i can't remember off the top of my head, but i tried to make all of them align with mcu as much as possible as to not fuck with canon)

for harry and gwen it's not a spoiler for the most part except for one thing is kinda spoilery but not really? it reveals something about one of their characters that has not been established in the fic yet so just to be safe i'm gonna tag this w the spoiler tag and put it under the cut

okay so i'll start with harry

so there's a lot of variations with harry - sometimes he has brown hair, sometimes reddish hair, usually blue eyes, though i love the idea of him having green eyes because. i mean. duh.

i didn't really think of fan casts for him specifically in hb, i haven't really gone in depth with his appearance in any of the chapters, but @alwaysonlineau made the actor from love, simon, nick robinson, the icon for harry's account and now i kind of can't picture anyone else lmao. nick has hazel eyes which can look greenish at times so i'm here for it. also i loved his acting in jurassic world and in love, simon so i think he could pull off harry pretty damn well.

here's the picture of nick robinson that @alwaysonlineau used that i REALLY love because it definitely has harry energy to me:

also i love that nick was in jurassic world with ty lmao. the ages are off obviously, nick is 28 and literally played ty's older brother in that movie, but for the sake of a fan cast i think nick when he was early 20's looks very Harry Osborn to me. at least he feels very fitting for fanon harry.

if someone were to actually play harry in the mcu i don't know if he'd feel super fitting, i've seen people mention harrison osterfield for mcu harry which i could see. i also looked through a list of harry fan casts and david mazouz looks harry like to me a bit. charlie heaton was also listed which idk if he could pull harry off but looks-wise i could kind of see. asher angel. i know timothee chalamet's name has been tossed around a bunch and i mean i think he could do it but he doesn't look like harry to me lmao. they'd have to make his appearance work for it.

maybe charlie rowe, who i also saw listed as a fan cast. asa butterfield was on that list as well and i could see the mcu going that route too. but in homeward bound, i pretty much just envision nick.

as for gwen stacy!

so, i thought this before @alwaysonlineau came back, and i know i'm not the only one because i've seen quite a few posts on here and other sites saying the same thing, especially after across the spider-verse came out and gwen had the trans flag and coloring and such, but i really think that hunter schafer would be an INCREDIBLE gwen.

it hasn't been mentioned in the fic yet (mostly because i didn't think of this until i was already like halfway through the fic and then i didn't officially decide on it until across the spider-verse came out) but gwen is trans in homeward bound. it's gonna be made explicitly clear as soon as i can figure out a fitting reason for why it wouldn't have been mentioned so far - it feels as though, since the fic is peter's pov and he's never mentioned it, it should be that gwen hasn't told him so he doesn't know, which means finding out is going to have to be a thing. not like a huge thing but it's going to have to become a scene of some kind that establishes the fact that she's trans and then also addresses why she didn't tell him/any of them.

i haven't decided on how yet - it might be a super casual thing where she just never thought to mention it because it's just a part of who she is and she doesn't feel the need to tell people because she doesn't think it really matters (and also hunter schafer has stated that she passes as a cis woman i remember seeing an interview after euphoria season one where she was talking about it and how like yeah it's great to have trans inclusion and representation in euphoria but also she knows that she's white and passing and that's probably a big part of why she got the role, which basically i'm mentioning because if hunter were to play gwen then gwen would also be able to pass very easily as a cis woman as well). i might make it a bigger thing, like maybe she experienced something (some kind of transphobia) in the past that made her very wary about telling people and then by the time she wanted to tell them it had been a long time so she didn't know how, etc. etc. etc.

i'm queer but like i'm a cis lesbian not trans or nonbinary or anything, i do have multiple trans friends and i've seen a lot of posts and art and such about different lives and experiences trans people have had but i'm still cis, so if anyone who isn't cis has any input on what they'd like to see, please let me know. i don't want to approach the topic with a lack of sensitivity and i want to have trans rep in hb but if people want it to be a casual thing then that's what i'll do, if people want there to be more to her backstory then i'll do that instead.

but yeah, basically i can REALLY picture hunter as gwen, like some of her acting in euphoria i feel has some potential gwen energy to it (specific scenes, some displays of emotion that i could see gwen having, etc) but also this picture of hunter feels VERY gwen to me:

also also, obviously zendaya is rue in euphoria so her and hunter are friends and have great chemistry together and as a gwemj lover that means a lot to me pdfjg

another possibility i could see is emma meyers, aka enid from wednesday. i think she's a great acctress and could encompass gwen's energy pretty well too, but my first pick would be hunter!

long answer short:

in homeward bound, i picture harry to look like nick robinson and i picture gwen to look like hunter schafer.

[titleleaf]

fifty ways to leave! SOOOO legit. Please regale us.

yessss I loved writing this fic but it feels like it's been ten thousand years so thank you for letting me revisit it

"fifty ways to leave", Taxi Driver (1976), Iris Steensma & Travis Bickle postcanon spectral gen written for Yuletide 2020

One thing I wanted to deal with in this fic is the film's uneasy conclusion with Iris being returned to her parents -- while being sexually exploited by Sport and witnessing violent crime is obviously a pretty awful state of affairs, there's plenty of stuff back at home that fucks kids up too, and I didn't like the thought that her right path in life necessarily meant going back to a settled socially-acceptable life. At the same time, older now, she's still stuck making compromises, selling a tacky fantasy, and being subordinated to dipshit men -- getting a shitty boring office job means forcing herself into a role she doesn't like much, both closeting herself as a queer woman and kind of doing workplace drag just to get through the door to interview. I wanted to write about Iris turned loose back in the urban wild without another person controlling her and trying to figure out how she wants to live.

I love writing fic about characters whose actors have work spanning decades where it's especially tempting to imagine those characters growing up/spanning time periods -- I just realized thanks to photos and shit I am now able to visualize Jodie Foster circa 1982-3 (with much nicer swingier hair than I have written Iris with in this fic) and it's so fun.

I love, love, love ghost stories and especially vanishing-hitchhiker-type stories of a living person sharing time and space with someone who couldn't possibly be there -- a phantom cabbie is just that turned inside out and I had fun trying to figure out the kind of visual signifiers that would flag to Iris that she's out of place even before she recognizes Travis. She's left with this tangible, physical record of their encounter, Travis' jacket as this object that's gotten dislodged from linear time, and in addition to continuing the vanishing-hitchhiker riff

Rereading now I think I also wanted to do some stuff with the physical residues of smoky, sooty, jizz-stained early-70s New York -- scent is a really powerful trigger for memories both good and bad and I know in my heart that both Travis Bickle and his taxi absolutely reek. Iris is as merciless to her own parents and upbringing in this fic as Travis is sentimental toward his own, but it's taken her this long to get that perspective on both of them and on Travis himself now that she's encountering him in the metaphorical flesh again. And I guess a ghost is another kind of residue??? Idk man.

If this fic has a sibling in the stuff I've written it's my fic for The Stand, "deep red bells" -- it's set in a no-Captain-Trips (or at least pre-Captain Trips) timeline where Nadine is trying to put together the information she can about this awful demon lover who's still pursuing her even a universe away, whose presence she can identify by its residues even if she can't find Flagg himself. If that's more about chasing ghosts this fic is just about Iris kind of living with them, and with the lack of satisfying conclusion and emotional resolution that a lot of people just end up living with. Iris in this fic is going to end up living to be like 85 and living an incredibly varied and rich life (idk what she'll end up doing -- feminist organizer, writer, artist, complicated person and incredible dresser and haunted urban waif) but she'll be carrying around the memories of this wildly unsettled, ambivalent experience and at times they'll be unbearably vivid even as they get more chronologically remote.

The title is because I cannot think about Paul Simon without laughing.

...I just realized that having Iris be raised Catholic opposite Travis Bickle's Schrader-given Presbyterian-coding gives them the same religious backgrounds as my own parents. I am going to try and avoid thinking about wtf this means about me psychologically.

[weebsinstash]

Ok so I'm revisiting this post because I am ashamed to say I kind of got a decent length into this stupid audio book and I Have Some Thoughts

-I listened to the first story Prince Reagan on the WeHear app, which also has a duplicate app, DreameFM, that has different stories but are very obviously owned by the same people which idk kinda gives me some sort of scammy vibes? Like idk why they feel the need to keep the stories and apps separate besides maybe maximizing profit or something

-These stories are very, I guess on a letter scale are very C or B- tier. They feel very YA sometimes because some of them are quite literally "I just turned 16 which is when I'm destined to find my mate, like all members of my werewolf pack, and it turned out to be the alpha's son BRAD who's 6'2 with his fair skin amd his sandy blonde hair but im so plain and pale and thin like a stick that he chose the popular girl STACY over me who is a huge bitch with long blonde hair and-" like it's ok in quality but it's ultimately almost like Baby's First Fanfiction. Like I kind started listening to Prince Reagan to clown on it bc it gave me Wattpad story vibes

-THAT BEING SAID I kind of got my tits blown clean off because yeah depending on the story they charge you money but some things are free if you unlock a free chapter each day but like, these stories literally go from "my mate rejected me for a prettier more popular girl but I had a glow up and he wants to get back at me but I said no #girlboss and now my new mate is a LYCAN PRINCE" almost like teenager level stuff to just full on dropping the smut bomb and suddenly you're hit with them just straight up saying gushing cunt, soaking pussy, his cock is so hard, etc etc etc and like it caught me right off guard because I was like "oh we're gonna say cunt up in here? We're serving cunt in my cheesy werewolf FFN quality story?"

-There's a very, like. ... so the VAs speak English but they flub their lines sometimes in such a way and a lot of these scripts are so similar in nature that idk I feel tempted to say "this app is probably from another country or at the very least a really small indie operation" not that that's inherently bad but like both of these apps seem to churn out a lot of very likewise stories that they charge money for and it almost seems like a grift or something

-Some stories like Prince Reagan have a male and female voice actor who switch off and maybe guests for one off characters or unique voices, but other stories like the one I just picked up called The Defiant Mate will have just a woman doing everything and YEAH this CAN be cringey! Some of these voices make me want to laugh and the dialogue can really be, I wouldn't say the absolute bottom of the barrel, but...

-almost every single story revolves around one of three things: there's either got to be a supernatural element like vampires or werewolves (predominantly werewolves like OVERWHELMINGLY), the Male Lead is going to be a powerful rich CEO or Prince or something, and or he's going to be possessive if not outright toxic (like in Prince Reagan he basically kidnaps her from her home by coercing her to come with him with threats of violence against her family and he later handcuffs her to his bed so she doesn't go anywhere, and in The Defiant Mate the pritag Jay-la is childhood friends and also fwb with the male lead Nathan and then he finds his destined mate whatever who winds up swinging st JL who is secretly pregnant and she defends herself and Nathan outright banishes her and tells her to never return so she leaves with their hidden triplets and later Nathan has her kidnapped when she doesn't want to return at his summons. and also i hate that i find these cheesy but kind of want to write something of my own fjrhfjf)

Anyways each story has the like first 2 or 3 chapters free and I'd say they're a unique way to pass the time if you're interested in picking up any supernatural stories or audio books or anything of that nature. Sometimes I listen to them while I'm stocking shelves and kind of just trolling on the plot or actually kind of getting a little invested maybe 😳

NOOOO THOSE BASTARDS! 😫 I got one of those WeHear advertisements that have been going around YouTube and I didn't realize some of them are literal full audio book chapters, in an ad? And I listened to an entire like 10+ minute audio chapter of one of those you know werewolf romance stories ("oh my Alpha mate is a prick and chose another woman and now another Alpha wants me to be his mate and Luna" like one of those and I started getting sucked in and then it ended! Villainous! It's one of those pay by the chapter apps too and I HATE those 😫 this is SABOTAGE, TREACHERY, SNEAKERY

[aerodaltonimperial]

More detectives, please. I love it so much. More of plucky investigative journalist Jack and film noir type Hook. or Idk private eye Willow and femme fatale Sky Blue who will double cross her for the same mafia queen she hired Willow to "protect" her from. Orange slacking his way through finding out who ate Trent's clearly labeled lunch. Top Flight tragically in a brother against brother L v Light type situation. Anything. Whatever.

I would say Hook as Batman, because obviously, that bitch thinks he gets to be Batman, but we've established over the course of previous asks that you aren't really into Batman. Thank you for putting up with my inability to NOT talk about Batman, given that case.

(Unfortunately for everyone involved, I got a horrible idea as a result of this ask. Welcome to Katy's open-sourced poll fic 2k24!!! You have 24 hours to choose the next move.)

Max Caster is crying. Very loudly, and… honestly, not very convincingly. Like, he’s never going to win an Oscar for this. But the wails are piercing enough to rattle the rafters overhead, and it’s really quite painful, so Jack peeks his head out of the doorway to try and piece together what, exactly, is going on. There’s no one else in the hallway, and from the fever pitch of Max’s devastated fake-sobbing, he clearly wants someone to come investigate things.

Fine. Jack walks until his shoulders hit the door frame. Max is inside the room, at least five pieces of luggage strewn around where the walls meet the floor. His own—at least, Jack hopes that’s Max’s own, given the way he’s been pawing through everything inside—has been flung open and ravaged. Jack looks from the mess surrounding the man and then up to Max’s face, which has paused mid-wail as a result of Jack’s appearance.

“What,” Jack says, full of compassion, “the actual fuck, Max.”

“Not you,” Max replies.

Well, fuck this guy. “What do you mean not me? I’m the only person down here, and you just started up theatrics that would get you kicked out of the Screen Actors Guild. What the fuck happened?”

“My belt is gone.”

“Your…” Jack frowns. “You mean, your title belt? What do you mean it’s gone?”

“I mean it’s not here, numb nuts,” Max cries, like he’s about to launch into round 2 of those horribly fake sobs. “I packed it, and I put my bag here while we went for checks, and now it’s gone. Someone stole it.”

Footsteps sound next to Jack’s position in the doorway, and then, before he can turn to see who it is, a fist slams into his shoulder, propelling him sideways. Well, no need to look now; it’s clearly FT-Double-Douchebag, his stupid hair tangled and his stupid sweatshirt askew and his stupid face doing that stupid expression he always does. Stupid.

“You sound like a god damn tornado siren,” Hook says, to Max, because heaven forbid he has to acknowledge that Jack is there, or that, you know, he just hit him. Jack kicks at Hook’s shin for good measure, because it feels good to watch him wince.

“Someone stole my belt!” Max exclaims.

“Probably one of the Gang Bang did it,” Hook says.

Max gives him a look of deep, deep annoyance. Jack feels a flash of camaraderie with Max Caster he’s never experienced before. “We are the Bang Bang Scissor Gang, Hook.”

“What the fuck ever, Caster,” Hook responds in kind, with an exaggerated eyeroll towards the ceiling. “Anyway, they probably took it.”

“They wouldn’t take it! We’re… we’re family.”

“You stole their dad,” Jack points out. “I’m pretty sure they still hate you and are faking all of this.”

Max throws his head back, hands grabbing at the little curls atop his head. “Jack! No one likes you! And I have to find my belt!”

“Christ,” Jack groans. “Fine, whatever. Just go find them and ask them if they took it. They’re probably in catering. Or, like, the bathroom.”

“This doesn’t concern people like you,” Hook snips.

Jack ought to punch him, but hey, as they’ve all seen, that sort of thing really doesn’t go over too well here. “Doesn’t concern you either, you asswipe.”

“I’ll just find one of the Scissoring Bangers, or whatever, and ask them,” Hook says. “You can leave. Bye.”

“Okay, for the last time, we are the Bang Bang Scissor Gang,” Max tries.

“It was my idea to find one of them and ask questions,” Jack says, sweetly, “and I know all you are good at is riding on people’s coattails, but I can handle this. I’m sure one of them stole it.”

Hook levels him with an unimpressed expression. “Well, you’d know all about betrayal and stealing belts, huh? E tu, Brute?”

“Are you guys even paying attention to me anymore?” Max asks.

“Your Latin pronunciation is terrible,” Jack tells Hook, “but so is pretty much everything you say, because it always sounds like you have sixteen marshmallows shoved in your cheeks.”

Hook’s face goes dark. But his cheeks also go red, cause he always gets a flush when he gets really angry, and since Jack knows that Hook hates it, he finds delight in the red streaking up to his temples. “I ought to punch you in the—”

“I don’t have time for this,” Jack says, with a great deal of pomp. “I have to go solve the mystery of Max Caster’s missing title belt.”

“Oh,” Max comments from inside the room. “That’s nice, actually. I appreciate that.”

“No, I’m going to find Caster’s stupid belt,” Hook says.

Max grumbles out a little, “It’s not stupid,” and Jack ignores him. He leans in, raising his eyebrows as Hook’s whole face wrinkles when the tips of their noses touch. “I’m going to find it first, and prove that I was always better than you.”

“You’ve never been better than me,” Hook seethes.

“Guuuuuuuys,” Max tries, plaintive, from the middle of his bag explosion.

“Fuck off, Max,” Jack snaps. “I’ve got a mystery to solve.”

Then he rams into Hook’s shoulder with as much force as he can muster before scampering down the hallway, and laughs at Hook’s sputtered little curses behind him.