#objects such as glasses or clothings aren’t tho

[caseyjones2012]

anyways have a wip of a rottmnt separated AU I’m working on

click on pic for better quality

[thatrandomartistjavi]

I actually do know why and it’s because the Cheshire Cat in the books is a house cat. He isn’t like the other animals that have free will, he’s very much dependent on someone(which is The Duchess).

And since they were trying to closely resemble the designs of the characters from the books, they kept him nude even tho he’s not the Duchess’ cat in this adaptation.

An in universe explanation is probably because of Cheshire being weird. Cheshire prides himself in being stranger than most people and what’s more stranger than being an anthropomorphic animal who lives in the woods with no clothes.

Also the Tulgey Wood creatures aren’t really comparable to the anthro animals because they aren’t like our traditional animals. All the anthro animals are very adherent to their real world counterpart but the Tulgey Wood creatures are more mixtures of real world animals and inanimate objects. Mirror Birds, Glasses bird, Horn Duck, Frog Cymbal, and Broom dog. It makes sense in a world of anthro animals and talking objects that their equivalent of wildlife are mixture of those two things.

If you're a fan of Alice in Wonderland and you've seen the 1951 Disney movie, you've probably wondered the same thing as me...

In Wonderland there are lots of anthropomorphic animals, all of them being animals but with human characteristics, like they walk on two legs, wear clothes, and live in houses... But here the question is... Why the Cheshire cat is the only one that is a cat as such? ...We'll never know...XDXDXD

In fact, in the tulgay forest a broom dog appears, which apparently does not act as if it were an anthropomorphic animal like Cheshire: I

[miekasa]

hey do you have a layout of the apartment that eren and reader share in "nice"? or maybe just random pictures that remind you of it? i really wanna see if i've been imagining it right

Here is my attempt at making a floorplan for their apartment and it was harder than I thought 😭😭 don’t ask me about dimensions or scale bc <2 just know that... it’s unreasonably big and the total cost of the whole thing is like $65 million which doesn’t even include the furniture or art they’ve put in since living there. Anyway, this is the general layout of the first floor, intended to look something like the Van der Woodsen’s apartment in Gossip Girl so you can also look at that! Might do the second floor later, but all that’s really up there is Eren and OC’s bedrooms (they’ll probably renovate Eren’s sooner or later) and ensuite, another balcony, and a smaller office. 

Basically, it’s very kinda open concept space design whatever you call it. Anyway, here are some fun facts about their apartment/living arrangement!

Eren designed the majority of the apartment. It came with a lot of furniture, but he switched them out and played a big part in the renovation.

Remember, the original plan was for Eren to live in his childhood apartment (now Carla’s apartment) when Carla moved to Paris full-time; he bought this one for the two of you to live in, and it was a surprise present. He doesn’t have the knack for making clothes like his mom, but he does have a knack for designing, and he’s pretty good at interior design. 

It’s mentioned in the fic, but the elevator opens up into their apartment because it’s the penthouse. No, not just anybody can come up, you have to scan a card or be on their list to get let up by the doorman. 

There is nothing in that storage closet but packages that they keep forgetting to open lmfaooo. Maybe a few extra winter coats and random shit. 

Those statues are actually relatively new. They were a gift from Mitchell (Carla’s husband) for their wedding; he had them commissioned from an artist friend he knew in Paris. They aren’t of you and Eren (that would be a little creepy), but they represent each other. 

Eren keeps buying art just because it matches the decor and he knows that art is like a status symbol or whatever. He doesn’t know what it means, but if he likes it (or if you mention you likes it), he buys it. 

That kitchen is a dream which is funny because Eren can barely cook. Mikasa can tho, so thank fuck for her. Eren can and has fit into that pantry. 

All the plants are fake because Eren has allergies. Also because he does not have a green thumb. You guys periodically change them out for the season, and the only time a real plant is in the apartment is during Christmas. 

Armin burned himself trying to use the fireplace once and hasn’t even stepped foot near it since; he doesn’t even sit on the twin chairs near it, only the sectional because he’s a big baby. 

Coffee table #1 is the more functional one; it’s where they sit and eat, lounge, drink wine, use their laptops, so there’s usually a bunch of stuff on it. Coffee table #2 is more for show; it’s made of glass has books on it, and a candle, too. 

Whenever you fall asleep on the daybed, Eren always carries you upstairs. Similarly, he knows you’re prone to napping on the daybed, so (before getting married), whenever he felt that you were working too hard/too long on schoolwork, he would tell you work there, just bc he knew you would fall asleep. 

There isn’t a symbol for it, but there is a big set of sliding doors that can close the dining room, but it’s always open (they usually eat at the bar anyway). They always host Thanksgiving dinner at their house, but they don’t throw a lot of formal parties otherwise. They do have their friends over a bit, and they randomly show up sometimes, so they keep the extra seating around. 

Eren loves the pool, and he loves dragging you into it. The outdoor grill legitimately only gets used by Connie whenever he has a grilling kick in the middle of the summer, what the fuck does Eren know about grilling other than it seems sick to have one. 

The outdoor “bar” doesn’t actually have alcohol stocked in it. The terrace is pretty secure, no drunk person could accidentally just fall off of it, but you still don’t like the idea of having drinks accessible out there. It’s mostly sodas and fruit juices. Occasionally you and Eren sit outside with a glass of champagne or two, but nothing more than that. 

The guest bedroom hardly gets used because your guests are obsessed with the sectional, so they usually fall asleep there. The only people who like the bed are Mikasa, Reiner, and Sasha. 

The atelier was, obviously, designed with Carla in mind. She does have her own apartment in the city, but Eren put this one in for her anyway (way before the events of NICE happened; which only goes to show that even though Eren is mad at his mom for her marriages, he never hated her and always sought to take care of her). It doubles as a fitting room and powder room of sorts. 

Eren has never used the first floor bathroom. 

The art at the end of the hallway was done by Jean, and was originally a gift for your birthday, but offered to pay him and value you it like real, expensive art. Eren claims that was a waste of money. You just have to point to any random object in the house to humble him about “wasting money.” 

[crystalirises]

Gods Au, where Georgebur teaching Fundy his role as a patron god.

Awwwwwwwww cutee!!

I like the idea, it's def v cute tho it will def pose some problems for Fundy in the future due to well... having two parents that are gods and him being a god himself. Well it could be worse. He could be a demigod and we all know how those turn out.

But anyway, have this fluffy (though with angst) interaction with this happy fam. Nothing bad here. :)

Mostly cause for this fam... everything will always turn out fine. It's a fan-made family dynamic, canon can't hurt me with it why should I hurt myself by making angst for it XD

Warning, there are mentions of death and nightmares. And well... they’re gods... they’re not necessarily kind to mortals.

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Also I added Dream at the end because I don’t know, why not, ya know?

"Fundy, it takes time. Your powers have only just begun to manifest." George ran a hand through his son's ginger curls, the strands sticking to Fundy's forehead due to the heat of the room. A cold chill behind him alerted George to his husband's presence, no doubt awake from the terrified screams of their son. "You're safe, Fundy. You're safe."

"I'm not!" Fundy continued to wail, hiding his face in George's shirt.

He tossed a glance towards Wilbur, hoping that his eyes conveyed enough to show that he needed help. Wilbur moved closer, sitting down on the edge of their son's bed, tracing gentle circles across Fundy's trembling back. "They're not your future, Fundy. What you see are mortal fates, ones that you'll never have to go through."

Their son shook his head, the nightmare still lingering in his mind despite George and Wilbur's best efforts to calm him down. George rested his chin on top of Fundy's head, holding his son close to his chest. They had been warned. The god of sleep and the god of death? Any offspring they had would suffer grievously under the combination of both their domains. When the nightmares had begun, George and Wilbur thought Fundy would be able to handle them...

But ever since the first nightmare, it's only gotten worse.

“I don’t want to go to sleep. Dad, I don’t want to go to sleep!” As a god of sleep, the statement pained him, but in the end George was just the god of sleep. Even he didn’t get nightmares, nor dreams. He pulled his son closer to his side, his cries dying down into soft sniffles, Fundy wiping his tears with the long sleeve of his pajama. Wilbur met his gaze, a silent battle warring through their eyes before George caved in. “It’s scary, Fundy, we understand. But this is who you are.”

“But it hurts... and I’m scared all the time.” Fundy whimpered, moving so that he could hide his face in the crook of Wilbur’s neck. While George would never admit it (especially not to his husband’s already smug face), Wilbur was the better cuddler. Wilbur wrapped his arms around their son humming as he rocked back and forth. “It’s horrible! It’s never happy, only pain and hurt and death.”

“We know, Fundy. We know. But they’re just prophecies, prophecies of futures to come. They can’t hurt you.” He reached out to run a hand through Fundy’s hair. It was difficult to help their son when either god had never once dealt with a nightmare. George had nothing but blissful sleep, and Wilbur barely slept at all - he didn’t need to, death didn’t rest, after all. “They’re visions, and for now they are stuck in your mind because you can’t deliver them yet to those who need them the most. Fundy, do you remember how I induce sleep to the restless?”

“Yes...”

“Well, sweetheart. While I do enjoy sleep, it is also my duty to give the gift of slumber to mortals.” He petted their son’s head, “You can give your dreams.”

Fundy sniffled, wiping his runny nose on Wilbur’s yellow sweater (and honestly, George will never understand his husband’s insistence on such mortal clothing), which caused Wilbur to let out an exaggerated gasp. Their son loudly snickered, somewhat amused by his action before the same nervous look crossed his eyes. Wilbur cupped their son’s cheek, “The nightmares must be really scary... Death is sometimes scary too, but there’s peace in death too, my little champion. But if you can’t handle the nightmares... then perhaps you should assign an oracle.”

“... how?” Fundy paused for a moment, “Aren’t oracles mortal too?”

“Oracles are mortals blessed with the gift of prophecy. Choose a mortal and make them your oracle, then they will be your messenger.” George summoned a large piece of glass in front of them, its surface shimmering before a vision of the mortal realm formed upon it. Fundy’s eyebrows knitted together, eyes scouring through flashes of visions, all sorts of mortals appearing within the glass. “They’ll be gifted. No mortal could say no to such a blessing. You only need to pick one.”

“But...” Wilbur turned Fundy’s head back towards the glass, leaving Fundy’s question unanswered. They both knew what the concern was, and both chose not to acknowledge it. They were gods. Fundy shouldn’t have to worry if the nightmares would be worse within a mortal’s mind. Fundy continued to look at the glass surface, reaching out after a moment. The image stilled before them.

‘A strange choice...’ George thought, gazing at the vision of the mortal their son had chosen. This mortal hid his face behind a white porcelain mask, a childish drawing of a smiley face painted on its surface. His attire consisted of a green hoodie (at least that’s what he assumes it is, Wilbur was better at naming mortal objects) and black pants. He glanced over at Fundy, their son continued to stare at the mortal, eyes widened slightly in interest. George narrowed his eyes.

“Why this mortal?”

“I don’t know...” Fundy looked away, “He’s intriguing.”

George sighed, “He’s a mortal, and your soon to be oracle. Nothing else, Fundy.”

[peterbae]

Into it — Starker

W: age difference, incest kink — Peter and Tony aren’t actually related, but they like to pretend they do, exhibitionism kink

Author’s note: Okay, so I saw this @starkerxstarker ‘s  prompt and decided to write something just for myself. I decided to publish it tho, so I hope you’ll enjoy it!

(English isn’t my first language so forgive me for any mistakes) ...

Well, the blame wasn’t his to begin with, no matter what Tony says now.

It started pretty normal with Tony’s “Yes, show Daddy how much you love his cock.”, when Peter was going down on him, and then it turned into something more.

After discovering that they both shared this one specific kink, they made the very best of it. It turned them on more than anything else before — age difference, the obvious power play and an adrenaline rush they got from thinking they could get caught. And get caught they did…

The only peaceful morning Avengers could have (since Thor was absent due to him visiting Lady Jane), as Clint referred to it every time he told this story, the heroes were eating their breakfast. Pop tarts weren’t flying in the air so they deemed it a success. Steve made some French toasts and their happy chatter could be heard from the elevator. Unfortunately, if someone was engaged in other business, the presence of Captain America, Black Widow, Hulk, Hawkeye and the Falcon could be missed. Especially when a ride from ones bedroom to communal kitchen took so long and you were graced with company of your younger, persuasive boyfriend.

The two appeared in the hall, abandoning elevator’s wall for the hall’s one. It was just Parker’s luck, as Tony later explained, that their current location gave the group perfect view of what was happening. Mind you, they were about to stop them, but before they could, Tony’s mouth found its way to younger man’s neck and as he threw his head back, he moaned: “Oh, Daddy”.

The silence that followed was broken by gagging sounds made both by Clint and Sam. Natasha just raised her perfect eyebrow and Steve… Well, he blushed and asked them to take a seat.

What the Avengers did not know was that he liked it. One look at Tony made Peter’s knees weak and he could hardly focus on his breakfast. But he survived awkward boner and later on had very successful time in older man’s lab. Genius noticed — of course he did. He always did. And if Peter cum on the spot after hearing Stark’s dirty talk and mentions of glass walls that exposed them to anyone who would dare to visit Tony’s dungeon, as they liked to call it, nobody needed to know.

But then it turned into something else. After accepting the whole daddy kink thing they had going on, they went on a little trip. Somehow they ended up in some small town in Virginia. It wasn’t as bad as Tony made it to be and Peter really liked town’s aesthetic. It was also very funny to see his daddy stumble when the fifth person he tried to charm didn’t recognise him. Peter hid his mouth in his fist and tried to stay calm, when the oblivious waitress took their order.

“And anything else for your son?” She asked, and Peter immediately froze. He looked up only to see genius’s unreadable expression. “No, that will be all, thank you.” He told young woman.

When he caught genius’s eye, he didn’t know if he was upset. Tony gave the waitress his press smile and then focused on his own food. Spider-man couldn’t quite figure him out so he did the same.

You see, the thing is, Peter didn’t know if his boyfriend was upset, but he did know that waitress’s words excited him. Only couple of minutes later he caught Tony’s gaze on his red cheeks, which made him blush even more.

Peter coughed, trying to act like he was fine, but the dark eyes that were currently on his mouth didn’t make it easier. “Eat your pancakes, Pete. Dad’s got a thing he has to take care of later.” He murmured and Peter knew he was in for a hell of a ride.

The pension they were staying in wasn’t too far, so about half an hour later, they found themselves in their room. Peter’s back was on the wall, his hands held above his hand in a tight grip.

“You liked that, didn’t you?” Tony asked, getting younger man to shiver under his gaze. “The thought of them seeing us as father and son.” Older man continued. “You like being seen as this pure, innocent boy, huh, Pete?” He asked and all Peter could do in response was nod. He whined, high pitched voice going straight to genius’s cock. “Now, now, Pete, use your words.” The older man hummed, scratching the back of spider-man’s neck. “You’re a big boy, aren’t you?” He teased.

Peter blinked, his eyes slowly focusing on a figure in front of him. His eyes a little bit darker than usual, his mind practically blank because of their little making out session. It took him a minute, but Anthony was nothing if not a patient man (he really wasn’t, but for his dearest, he could wait). He waited this long and Peter knew he could wait longer. He wasn’t going to give in, no matter how desperate his boyfriend was.

“Ah, I—I do.” Younger moaned eventually. “You… Your age..” He groaned but somehow he knew that Tony knew what he meant. He wasn’t wrong, because brunette soon took a pity on him and his fingers found its way to Peter’s hole.

The thing is, it didn’t end with that. They continued, at first a little hesitant (Peter) and amused (Tony), not leaving their bedroom as they often did before discovering this new kink. It’s been almost three weeks after their little trip to Virginia, when Peter, face flushed with embarrassment, threw something at Tony. It was an ad, apparently targeted at fathers and their teenage sons. Older male only sent him a quick glance, raised one eyebrow, but didn’t say a word. The next thing he knew, KAREN informed him about the new appointment on his calendar and boy, was he excited.

The festival or whatever the thing was, wasn’t what Peter suspected it would be. He thought about something more or less related to countryside carnivals. At least, that’s what the flier said. As it turned out, it was more of a private celebration for the richest. Of course, man like Tony Stark was greeted with open arms, and as Peter later realised, that’s precisely why he agreed to come in the first place. They were safe from a public eye here. He knew he should’ve felt relief, but the well hidden disappointment was still there. That’s when it became clear to him — he wanted the world to see, to know that Tony Stark was his and to think about the filthy things they could be caught on doing only turned him even more on.

He survived — somehow — politely answering all the questions, smiling at businessmen, eating his ice cream and following Tony’s path all day. He even called him dad once or twice, only to see Iron Man’s facade falter. The man was too stoic for his liking, his press smile on, his eyes hidden under the expensive glasses. It’s safe to say that these couple of times were the only things that Peter actually enjoyed.

At the end of the day, it wasn’t really as fun as he imagined it would be. Whole event reminded im about the galas they attended regularly, all pretty clothes and boring speeches. It just wasn’t what Peter was looking for.

That’s why the next day, when he found himself pushed to the glass wall of Tony’s office, he didn’t hide his face. Older man asked him if being caught turned him on and he decided it was now or never. He threw his head back, laying it on older’s arm and looked at him with hooded eyes. “So much.” He whispered, only to moan shamelessly when man’s hand massaged him through his pants. Peter wanted more and he hoped that the heavy gaze of his lover meant he understood his tricky signs. If not, he could start considering openly talking about this thing, but god, he didn’t want to. He wasn’t exactly what you’d call shy, but the bedroom stuff still wasn’t something he enjoyed to talk about. After all, he always liked the hands on experience better.

The fact that he was dating genius came in handy. Tony always noticed everything about his surroundings. He was able to tell what was wrong with any household object after short inspection and more often than not was also able to tell what Peter tried to tell him indirectly. That was the case this time too.

Sunday evening they found themselves in some expensive restaurant that older man swore Pepper recommended. They sat in the darkest corner of the place and after couple minutes they decided what they wanted.

Tony greeted waiter with an easy smile, noticing his awestruck gaze. At this moment Peter knew that they were leaving huge tip. Genius always did, but especially when someone so obviously excited to see him, still acted professional and did their best to make them feel comfortable — ordinary, as he heard brunette once say with that longing look.

“The same for my son.” Tony said, not even bothering to hide his wide grin.

Peter decided that two could play a game and soon, he added: “Dad, I’m 19, I can order for myself.” He scolded the man, sending the waiter small smile.

Poor worker, unaware of their little game, just nodded along and left. The next thing he knew, Tony stood up, relocating himself so he sat beside Peter.

“So you’re all grown up now, huh?” Billionaire asked, tracing younger’s spine with his left hand. “We both know you’re just as helpless as the baby, Pete…” He whispered, his breath tasing the skin of teenager’s neck.

“What are you doing?” Peter asked, when older found his way to front of his pants. He unbuttoned them regardless of younger’s almost silent protests. The rest of the guests couldn’t possibly see what was going on, but he could bet on the fact that his face was a give away anyway. He was hard, so he couldn’t exactly lie to the man next to him. Beside, it wasn’t like he was enjoying it.

The humiliation became even more apparent when the confused waiter came back. The two were still hidden, but figuring out what they were doing wasn’t really a rocket science. It was a miracle that they weren’t being thrown out on the spot. Peter suspected it had something to do with the fact that they were Avengers and the man currently stroking his dick could probably buy and destroy the whole restaurant without losing any serious money.

“Ah, Peter, darling, let daddy help you with that.” Tony teased and teen could only feel sorry for the, now absolutely red, waiter. He noted to tell his boyfriend to be exceptionally generous with tips today. After all, this, whatever it was, probably wasn’t in the poor guy’s job description. And they did let him think that they were related at first. Peter just hoped they didn’t scare him for the rest of his life with their little incest thing.

“Tony, we’re gonna get caught.” He choked, placing his hand on the genius’s forearm. He didn’t push or tried to maneuver older’s hand out of his well fitted jeans. He just unconsciously held it — probably to gain some balance. Not that he was in any shape to think about that now, when Tony started moving his hand. “Would that really be so bad, though?” Superhero asked, caressing younger’s thigh with his free hand. “Wouldn’t you like them all to know that you belong to me?” He whispered, almost completely covering him from curious eyes. After being teased and held so closely he could very well smell what was undoubtedly Tony’s expensive cologne and the scent that was entirely just him, all Peter could do was whine. He gave in, just like that, allowing himself to finally enjoy this fantasy of his.

Soon, they found themselves sitting in a sports car, Peter with sticky briefs and Tony with a smug smile. If the hard on in genius’s suit pants was anything to go by, this was another thing the superheroes were not going to give up quickly. And if they scandalised more waiters, they always made sure to make it up to them with generous tips.

[psychemeanscure]

PART 8

“Holy Sh*t. Jang! Did you just--- Urgh! You bastardo.”

A surprised curse blurts out into her mouth definitely, the moment she led her unprepared eyes upon the arrogant Jang Taeyoung who is just confidently came in to the room where she is. Only to receive an exasperating awe which also halts his steps for a second through its closet. Doubting eyes now landed to her. “Did I heard it right?  You just cursed in English? That’s new eh?”

His very random casualty anyhow which she straightly did not entertain. Him who is finally settling a chosen cloth putting it for a bit on the backrest of his dressing table chair. while she in the other hand has to deal with it as usual. He’s only wearing a bathrobe, for Pete’s sake! She can’t still even oblige herself to turn her head to look at him. Waking up in an unfamiliar room was already a bewilderment for her, what more with this loco she is with. She almost seen half of his--- “Aish! Can you please wear something already?!” only answered by a smirk which she obviously unseen.    

“Wait? Are you shy? What a news. So, Sung Eunyoung still knows how to get nervous, huh?”

Thus, she had no choice but to face him with a frowning look, remembering to seek her own confusions. “Tsk. Happy? Where am I anyway? And why am I with this thing?” pertaining to the IV inserted in her wrist certainly, as her gaze wanders to him who’s reaching a first aid kit from a bedside table.

“To detox the drug in you. And for the record, you’re in my penthouse.”

His firm answer indeed while she was shock, undecided between which she must confirm first. “What?” the sensible remark she can only utter then. Eyes still following onto him who’s now setting himself to grab a seat beside her on the bed. “Which of the two did you mean by that? I can’t follow.” Him who’s starting to get a cotton and sanitizer from the kit, which also led for the appearance of her anxiousness that she was now totally agitated settling her eyes between his movement and to her IV, including her unsettled answer as well.

“T-the pent--- I mean the drug. I was drug?!” her stuttering success words somehow, but not long enough to get her nervous the moment he finally holds her forearm that she quickly moves back. “Hey, what are you doing?” her prudent fight indeed, only to be hold back by him. “I’ve been doing this on my own, Sung Eunyoung. Trust me.”

Just to be answered by her hesitating groan, still. “Are you sure? Can’t you at least call a doctor instead?” thus a frustrating sigh went into him totally. “Seriously, woman? Who do you think settled this dammit Intravenous, and the hell who shot you a tranquilizer during your influence, huh?”

“You shot me a what?!” obviously another surprise for her. “You heard it. So, are we settled then?” only proceeded by her surrendering hum. “Good. Tss. You stubborn volatile.” His last statement then, before cautiously performing the removal of the IV. Not when he heard a whimper from her though who’s actually avoiding her eyes from her wrist. Reason for his little laugh as well. “You’re afraid after all. Is it blood or needle?”  holding her temper not to explode. “Shut up. Just finish what you are doing will you?”

Only to hear another laugh from him. Somehow take the courage to look at him though, as she only notices the usual brushed up hair of him is on a hair down bangs for a while. ‘He looks good.’ As what her thoughts says otherwise. Later landed to the glimpse of his tattoos especially by the lower part of his neck. ‘se---‘

“I might melt anytime soon, Sung Eunyoung… You don’t have too fluster me, I already know I’m erotic.”

Before she could piece her second thought obviously, he already concluded it right. That she had to only clear her throat and avoid his gaze instead. Before deciding to dodge it by another reopening topic. “Uh. Hm. Right, tell me how did I got influenced then. What drug was it?” only to be answered by his hidden smirk as he welcomes to give her details.

“Ecstasy. So basically, the filthy Spanish dimwit poured a powder type in your drink and you carelessly bite it. The end.”

As if his tale-like story telling that he already expected the disbelief reaction to her who only manage to glance by her reflection through the window glass, out of frustration.  

“Jesus. It literally slipped on my mind. He probably did it when I was focused to the gift h--- wait? Speaking of, where was i---“

“Burned.”

Somehow satisfied from what he did. “Ah. Okay.” That she just casually answered without objection. But to him was a bit unexpected. “I actually thought you’ll disagree. But after learning from you today, well I like it though. Good to know.” And with the last touch from the cotton and plaster tape on her wrist. He’s finally finished. “I did something crazy, aren’t I?”

Just to receive a sly smirking smile from him, as he even tilting his head for teases. “Want to go on details as well?” understanding his remark perhaps that her hair should be disheveled. Promptly realizing the white shirt and checkered pajama on her that surely his. As she was now fuming mad with the man beside her. “You take advantage of me?!”  

Fully her accusations indeed after hastily throwing a pillow to his face. “Great. What a word for a thank you.” As he helplessly reached the thrown pillow somehow and putting it back on the bed. “Listen, woman. I honestly did not. Well fine, almost. And upon mine you were wearing, I called assistance. Now, does it answer your madness then?”

Crossing his arms as he gave the straight explanations to her. Only to see the doubting look on her, still. Cause by his aggravating sigh. “Do I now have to call for CCTV personnel?” scoffing in the end as she just chose to believe his words. Thus, he stands up after closing the first aid kit and place it back where it belonged.

“Anyhow. I had to go somewhere for a bit. I already called room service for your breakfast, though. You’ll just have to open the door for them. Unless you’re in a diet…” thus his quick reflexes of changing his clothes began that she had to curse him again as she just decided to went out of his bedroom first instead. Than implanting malicious images she never wished to see anyway. Loud banging of the door definitely, proceeding with her series of curses. “Urgh! This maldito bastardo, really.” Only to be answered by a laughter from him once more.

As she went nowhere to his living room couch. Frowning eyes still focused to the cursed room she went out. “Tss. This bastardo really get on my nerves. Aish.” Her last call of complains finally, before chooses to just wander her eyes to the features of his penthouse somehow. For it was also her first time to be inside it. Truly it is, for she always refused his invites. The hell will she dared too. Thus, she starts to stand up from the couch, roaming herself to each corner of his living room with the crossing of her arms, as if a critique meticulously rules on every aspect of it. From the structure of its walls, design of selected artworks, to the bookshelves, until a pit stop to his window glass. Giving the answers of her opinions. “Hm. Not bad.”

“Of course! Why would it be?”

Just to hear the boasting remark of the owner who seems good to go, after buttoning a last button from his coat sleeves. Too late to regret her compliments. “So a Jang Taeyoung knows to read somehow, huh?” her motioning to the pile of books in a way. “Uh. That? Nah. Just for display purposes. You don’t have to fall in love. Are you?”

That she had to rolled her eyes with his nonsense schemes. “Just go, please.” The dullness of her words certainly. “Wow. I was not informed that my penthouse has a new owner, eh?” thus, his sarcasm came in. “Big word, as if you’re not doing it well with my apartment.”

Satisfied by the raising of his arms of surrendering. “Fine, I lost. Jeez you, woman. You really have your way of words I can’t seem to defeat.” As he starts to push the up icon of his private elevator, with a freehand in its pockets. “Bye! I shall return. Don’t worry, I won’t take long. Be good to my penthouse. Alright, Love?”

As much as she hurries to protest by his last word, she’s too late anyway for the doors of the elevator already closed with the sly winking man inside it. That she only walks back with a frustrating shaking head. Not long enough after remembering her little disappointment a while ago, unconsciously turning her head to the closed elevator again.

“He looks better with a hair down, tho--- Aish! Am I really thinking about that? Urgh.”

Her reproaches to herself definitely, after shaking her head again as she chooses to continue exploring his penthouse anyway while waiting for the room service to arrive. Later on take a minute before it finally came, that she can even decipher the discerning eyes of the service crew as if implying something she surely know. “If you’re done, you’re good to go.” A superiority coldness from her words indeed, just enough to scare an already nervous crew, which she did not fail to give an intimidating look the moment it went out.

“Mierda! So, I had to suffer for misjudgment now? Great. Just great.”

Her last complains definitely, before settling to the food served for her. And when she’s in the middle of biting the last variant of fruits, a small opening from somewhere caught her attention that she even takes its saucer and fork with her as she steps into it. Just to be astonished upon learning what’s through it.

A better view of the mesmerizing sky and busy streets of the city. That she wished she could see during the night. Capturing every futuristic structures. Not when her eyes landed to its indoor pool situated on the center though. That she intuitively frowns with the thoughts of him bringing different b*tches for his satisfaction. Thus, without any second thoughts, she swiftly avoids her gaze to it, not liking to feed her thoughts with much scandalous one. Thankful for her eyes to find a much intriguing view. As she decides to put off the saucer and fork on to a wooden deck chair just beside her. Walking her steps towards a wall to later take off the satin cloth covered on it.

A pastel portrait of Jang Taeyoung that is too good to be one. For she almost considered it a photo. Clasping her hands to her back as she somehow studied the intricate wave of lines of it that she began to get curious of its texture and was about to touch it.

“Loving your view?”

Only to be cut by the devil who’s obviously just came back from his agenda. That she had to turn her back to the portrait and unwillingly face the latter who had just use her fork to pick a fruit from her saucer on the wooden deck chair. “Not really.” Chooses to slip her disapproval by his actions, instead, and just better entertain his questions. “Why?” his itching question while she tends to point to her back, again.

“Well, did this man tell you how I’ve been discriminated by a service crew as if I’m one of your bicha, huh? Cabrón?”

Only to accused the innocent portrait indeed. Leaving him in awe somehow. “See? That’s the result of your everyday refusal with my invites. They could have been familiar to you by now if you at least agree just once.” That she only gives in a rejecting snort. “No thanks still, Mr. Jang.”

“Oh, come on. Again?”

“Since I can tell how many b*tches you already brought and claim with this dirty pool of yours. And you still expect me to come?”

Pouting with the thought truly, as he even gazed his eyes to the thing. “Well I can’t argue with that, though. Do you want me to move out, then?” that confusions crept her. “Eh? And what does it have to do with me? Do what you want, why need my permission, Loco. You have money enough to waste.”

That the only thing he could do is snap in the air. “Right. What am I expecting even? Tss. Here, at least.” That’s where she noticed two paper bags in his hands as he offers one to her. Somehow understood her questioning gaze onto it that he seemed oblige to answer in some way. “Your cloth from yesterday. I handed it to the laundry last night. In case you want to retrieve it?”

Just a reason for her sudden irritation in a way. “Trash that. I can only remember what the coño kid did to me. Urgh.” Thus a satisfying smirk paved his way. “I knew it. A new one it is.” Him, swapping it with the other one then, as she seems contented by his guts. “Thank you.” Accepting the offer indeed by means of her starting walking ahead of him to finally change. Remembering something she almost forgot to ask. “Right. By any chance. Did you manage to---“    

“Don’t worry. We already solved the mess, Ms. Sung.”

Cut by her words obviously, but somehow relieve by his answer. “Good. I thought I---“

“Almost forgot to remind you as well that the next time you wear revealing clothes, don’t expect me to be a good boy. Understand, hm? Love?”

Had to gasp an unexpected certainly, for she did not expect his sudden move, hugging her from behind as soon as she went out of the changing room. In means of feeling his rubbing thumb on the navel part of her body. Worst when he leans to kiss the back of her earlobe, that she had to grip to his hold for a while as support to her unravel stance and close her eyes like it’s the best sensation she ever had, to later silently curse herself with the thought. If this is the aftermath of her influence, then screwed up! She really hated it totally. By means she had to fight it in any way. With a gritting teeth and stern look, she succeeded surely.

“Get your hold out of me before you meet your destiny behind bars, Jang Taeyo---“

“Want to take revenge with the dimwit somehow? I can be a help though.”

The supposed to be frustration from cutting her words only replaced by a tempting welcome from the offer he suggested. “How?” too late to regret her move of turning her head to face him, as she forgot they were still close to each other.  Opposite to how he desirably stares to her lips. Meeting his sly expression again. “Now, you’re all ears.” His only remark before miraculously just let go of her without urging for teases like he always do. Except for the smirk, maybe. Thank God still, as the thought of punishing someone excites her for no reason.

[prome-th3us]

My spirits

Ok this is not actually a part of my path but hey the next part will be about my spirit guides, a little bit of context is ok.

As I said in the introduction, when I was a small bean I used to see them around, even in hospitals and places that aren't my house. I was hearing my name being called a lot from female/male voice when only my dad or mum were at home at it wasn't their voice, but they were like "imagination girl, don't worry".

With time I stopped seeing them but I've always felt kinda uncomfortable at home: I knew someone else was there and that they were staring at me, even at night.

As soon as I started practicing witchcraft seriously, I started seeing shadows moving around and with time, at least at my house, I started to see their real aspect.

At my house I keep the energy under control basically constantly, so I know when something is around and I can easily find them. When I'm out I don't do that so no dead people around that I can notice

I have various visitors sometimes, I had a little child who got to me (idk why) and a middle-aged woman, but they weren't supposed to be there so I asked to a medium to help me with "leading them to the other side", idk how to call it.

Then we have two pretty loud guys: Mark who is a German soldier, died not that far from my home during the Second World War because and he got killed by his comrades cause he didn't want to follow the orders anymore (I will get into the situation of my city during this time when I will talk about my spirit guides, but just as you know: at that time Germany invaded Italy and I'm in a border city, so we had German soldiers, Italian soldiers and Slovenian soldiers all fighting here who were trying to control or help the population, it depends on the faction).

He had been roaming around for quite a while in the fields and in my city, then he met my grandma and my mum and he liked them so he stayed with them. Now he is with me because I can interact with him and he doesn't want to leave, but except knocking on my closet doors when he wants to play chess he doesn't do anything, so I'm ok with him.

The next one is Davide, he was one of my dad's friend who died when he was in his 20s. He is basically following my dad since that. Davide actually made me really uncomfortable at the beginning because I was feeling this really angry energy in different places of my house and I couldn't banish it. After the first try he started becoming loud always when I was home alone: I was hearing footsteps, things were knocked off from the shelfs, washing machines have been made without me starting them and a lot of objects were going missing.

I was pretty confused because some of those things are a Loki's thing so we had some arguments about that, like:"I'M HERE WHY DO YOU KEEP KNOCKING OFF MY BOOKS AND STEALING MY HEARINGS, JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED" "Baby girl I swear it's not me, it's a spirit"

And lol I wasn't completely believing him. Anyway I got tired of the situation so I grabbed my pendulum and in a very aggressive way I talked with him and then with my dad to have a confirmation. I didn't tell him that his dead friend was here with us but I asked how he was when he was alive, pretending that my dad already talked about him (he never did, still an open wound). Basically he was the type of guy who could steal your grandma and hide her under the sofa without you noticing, he loved throwing pranks and he was the LOUDEST person in the whole world. Yeah very much like his spirit.

Loki and he go pretty along together, they are making my life a little chaotic mess and even Mark, who is super quiet usually, now is going to the dark site.

I really love them tho, I always have something to laugh about when I'm not in the mood to do so and actually some of their pranks are good.

Interaction with them

Tbh I don't do anything in particular. I have an altar for the dead and here they have some glasses of water and a bowl with some dried food that I change once a week, when I do that for the Gods.

Sometimes they do want to interact more: with Mark I use to play chess (it's very long, I have to use a pendolum because a lot of time I just can't really see him, it depends on how tired I am. Sometimes Hekate or Loki help me too), read out loud some poetry/philosophy, talking about girls (he's 25 or something like that) and clothes cause he really loved dressing up when he was alive and not fighting.

For Davide it's a little different. He is very energetic so I can't do something easy with him. Usually he disappears with Loki and I really don't want to know where they are and what they are doing, sometimes he even messes up with Beelzebub which can get very pissed about it. When I want to distract him for quite a while I call him to watch some YouTube videos about Call of Duty (when Mark isn't around), I play some anime or I simply play some games like Halo. He also has some fidgets on his part of the altar, even tho I've never seen him interacting with them.

When they get too loud, considering that they aren't spirit guides and that they are literally messing up my house, I just shout:"PLEASE BE QUIET" and if they don't listen:"SHUT THE FUCK UP", cause I'm always polite and nice lmao.

[n0irrrr]

shingeki no kyojin

reiner x male reader insert [soulmate/moder au, angst]

[one shot / 3860 words]

based on this prompt

summary: When your soulmate cries, your eyes began to water. Unexpectedly so; you have seen cases where one of your friends randomly cries when both of you are talking. It worries you at first, but rapidly they explain is 'their soulmate crying'.

notes: would u believe i had this since september in my messy folders damn, i really wanted to finish it tho also, reiner x male readers ARE NONEXISTENT. WHAT THE HELL. thats very bad and should be changed!

masterlist

When your soulmate cries, your eyes began to water. Unexpectedly so; you have seen cases where one of your friends randomly cries when both of you are talking. It worries you at first, but rapidly they explain is 'their soulmate crying'. 

You have never felt your soulmate cry. Your eyes have never watered, no tears— not that you remember, at least. This made you thought that your soulmate is someone strong, someone that doesn't get played by their emotions that easily.

You admire them, even if you don't even know them.

You, on the other hand, have cried for every kind of thing— a sad movie, a fight between friends, stress... It makes you embarrassed, actually. You only hoped your soulmate wasn't irritated by your crying...

"Something on your mind?" You heard a deep voice approaching you, quickly recognizing the voice. You turn, seeing a tall blond— Reiner. He leaves two cups on the table, instantly recognizing the smell of chocolate. He sits across you.

You slightly smile, "just thinking about my soulmate, that's all." 

He quirks an eyebrow, interested by the topic. "You said you have never cried because of them, right?"

"Nope. Not that I can remember..."

"Must be an 'Annie' case. You know, she only knew Bertolt was her soulmate when the big idiot saw her with Eren. Remember?"

You laugh by the memory— it certainly was funny now, but not back then. Poor Bertolt had feelings for Annie, and when he tried to finally confess to her thanks to Reiner and you, the three of you saw the blond girl walking with Eren, looking pretty happy. The view made Bertolt instantly cry in distress, and both of you could saw how tears came from Annie's eyes at the same moment.

Fortunately, Eren was only a friend to Annie. The whole thing had a happy ending, and every on and then the four of you —maybe just three— of you laugh by the memory. Bertolt only gets embarrassed, but if it wasn't for him, maybe he would never know who his soulmate was at that time.

"We were lucky. Bertolt saved his own ass by crying in that moment..." You take a sip from your cup, pleasantly tasting the hot chocolate. "Also, thank god Annie wasn't against the soulmate thing..."

"Who could say a big guy like him is a cry baby. I'm glad they got together, though. If not, Annie would have been suffering everyday with the tears."

You agree.

"Oh— what about your soulmate? Do they cry a lot?" You asked, tilting your head. You and Reiner really don't talk about your soulmates that much; the blond is secretive with those things, not that you mind. 

"They do. But lately, they haven't..." He blinks, wondering, "I guess they are... sensitive? emotional? I've lost count on how many times I've been crying with them. I don't mind, though."

You nod. Neither Reiner nor you have met your soulmate... Makes you wonder until when you two could— if you ever do.

A small but pleasant chatter begins between the two of you. Reiner has been a good friend of yours since high school— he has always seen as the 'big bro': reliable and protective over his friends.

He, on the other hand —and by your ignorance—, sees you more than a close friend. Even if he hasn't been with you in your hard times, he always has cared for you. Bertolt and Annie always tell him to confess already; follow his feelings and tell you how he feels. However, seeing how thoughtful you are with your soulmate, how many times you doze out wondering about them, makes him back off from every time he wants to tell you.

Just like now, actually. The buff blond thought this would have been a good opportunity— just you two sitting on a table on the middle of a coffee shop, surrounded of voices quietly talking, minding their business.

He thought how cute you looked with that red scarf on— how adorable you seemed wrapping your hands on the cup, trying to warm your hands on the middle of this winter. Reiner desired to wrap his hands on yours, kiss your nose and make you warm.

But that couldn't be, because he surely wasn't your soulmate. But he didn't mind— he can be strong for you.

Or so he thought.

His thoughts got interrupted when he heard a cough coming from you. Reacting quickly, he gently patted your back, seeing as you didn't stop. The coughing eventually ceased after some couple of seconds, but that was enough to make him worried— he didn't see you choking on your chocolate or any type of problem.

"Wow there, that lasted long. Did you got sick?" Reiner asked, preoccupied.

You shifted uncomfortably on your seat. "I've been... feeling a little funny lately... But I think it's just a cold. Nothing to worry about." You answered, hiding your true health problems. Yes, you have been feeling weird lately— sometimes weak, and other times your coughing have lasted longer than this time, but you didn't think much of it.

The blond looked unsure, "I don't know... Have you went to a check up?"

"It's just a cold, Reiner. I'm sure I'm going to be fine soon— it's winter, after all. Colds aren't that weird to get during this season." 

You tried to reason, but you could tell he wasn't buying it.

"Nope. You will get to a checkup, and I will accompany you."

"But Rei—"

"No buts, cutie. Let's go!"

You roll your eyes, a smile plastered on your face. Reiner takes your hand and guides you trough the coffee shop until you are outside, and you thank him internally. You felt a little weak— your legs didn't want to obey and if it wasn't for the strong but gentle grip on your arm, maybe you would have fallen.

━━━━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━━━━

"[Name] [Last Name]?" A nurse calls your name. You stand up with the help of Reiner, as he sees you trip over by your dizziness. 

"Wow there, feeling dizzy?" The blond asks as he helps you walk to the nurse. He doesn't say it— but he's becoming more preoccupied for you by the second. 

"A little..." You nervously chuckle, feeling a little worried. Trying to look well, you stand correctly with the help of Reiner, who's arms are protectively holding you still.

The nurse, seeing as the blond takes good care of you, guides both of you to a room. She knocks before opening, receiving an answer to come in. "Doctor Jaeger, [Name] [Last Name] is here for the check up." She turns at you and gestures to come in, opening the door for you.

Entering the room, you two are met with a blond doctor wearing glasses. He is taking notes in his notebook, but stops when he sees you. "[Name] and Reiner. Surprising to see you here. What's the problem?"

"Uhm, well, I just cough a little and I felt weak sometimes, but I'm sure it's just a cold and—"

"Don't believe him, doc. [Name] coughs like crazy and he trips over with his own legs." Reiner immediately interrupted you, irritating you. The blonde doctor humns in understanding.

"Sit here, [Name]. Will do the check up on you." He helps you stand and sit on another higher place. You felt like a child, honestly. He tells you what to do; cough, move your arms, open your mouth... Him and Reiner talk a little while your session.

When he finishes, Reiner instantly asks, "And? How is he?"

Zeke chuckles. "If I didn't know you I would say you are the clingy boyfriend." The blond jokes, winking. Reiner grunts, blushing just a little. You laugh, but cough instantly after. 

"Anyways, I will do more studies on you, [Name]. I don't see an exact anomaly on you, but you weakening doesn't say anything good." He stands up, "come with me, this shouldn't take long."

Zeke gestures Reiner to accompany him too. He guides you to a room with more instruments and medical objects, and he tells you to take off your clothes and wear the usual hospital gown while he gets everything ready.

"Don't you need help, babe? Come on— of course you do. Let me help." Reiner jokes, approaching you and placing both of his hands on your hips, trying to get your coat off. 

Blushing by his flirty acts, you smack his hands and stick out your tongue, "I'm not a baby! So if you excuse me..." You wait for him to release you, but his arms wraps around you tightly, and he hides his face on the crook of your neck. 

He's unnerving quiet, and that doesn't fail to worry you. It was weird sensing him so... nervous? weird? "Reiner...? Are you alright?" You try to make him talk, caressing his hands. 

He grunts, still hiding his face. He doesn't say it out loud— but smelling your scent calms his nerves. "I'm worried."

You laugh, relieved, "you don't have to be! It would not be anything bad. It's just a check up!"

He doesn't answer, and stays in the same spot. Reiner wants to confess how nice is being like this— it felts perfect. His strong arms around you, like some type of protector. He wants to stay like this forever.

But unfortunately, that can't be.

"Yeah, well, sorry for interrupting your loving scene but I'm a busy man and this will be quick." The doctor jokingly interrupts the intimate moment, trying to keep a serious face.

"We—We are not together!" You hastily say in embarrassment, trying to pry off Reiner's hands off you.

"Yeah, aha. Strip already, boy." Zeke closes the curtain and takes Reiner by the collar and takes him out, while the buff blond grunts and whines like a child.

While you change, you can't stop thinking about Reiner being so close to you. Just remembering his breath against your neck made you shiver and blush. Feeling his strong arms around you made you feel safe.

"You done?"

Blinking, you quickly change into the hospital gown and open the curtain. You can see Reiner sitting down on a chair with a grumpy face— it looks like he's pouting! You chuckle by the scene, and his face quickly lightened by your –beautiful– laughter.

He really likes you a lot.

"Alright, just stand here and I'll do the job."

Dr. Jaeger begins with the studies while Reiner sits there with a frown. He feels worried— a cold could be noticed right away, but Zeke didn't see anything of the sort. What could it be, then?

Looks like the 'check-up' turned more aggravating.

Zeke sighs and turns to both of you, and speaks:

"Well, I need you to come next week while I check these things." He approaches you and gives you a paper, "here is the prescription— the medicine is specially for when you feel weak, but I will not give more until I make sure what this is."

"Thank you, doc." Reiner speaks while you change, and he takes the opportunity to ask lowly, "is it serious? will he get better soon?"

"I don't know that, Reiner. Until I analyze the studies I could have an answer." He squishes Reiner's shoulder, "try to not worry to much. Also, confess already."

Reiner chokes, "W—What are you talking about?"

Zeke rolled his eyes, "I don't even know how he hasn't noticed. Both of you are airheads."

But before Reiner can speak, they hear your voice. "Done! Thank you for looking for me, Zeke!" You speak as you open the curtain, already changed in your usual clothes.

"No worries." He slightly smiles, flipping some pages of his clipboard.

You smile at him, and return your attention to Reiner. Blinking at him, you notice his face is reddish. “Uh? Are you alright? Your face is red." 

"Y–Yeah," he clears his throat, "let's go, I will drop you at your apartment."

Both of you say goodbye to Zeke and leave the place, not before getting the medicine Zeke prescripted you. The ride back your apartment was normal with Reiner doing most of the talking. You throw jokes here and there, laughing with Reiner by your silliness. He loves hearing your laugh— loves seeing your smile, the way your face blushes...

God, he is really losing his mind.

The ride ends by his disappointment. You get out of the car and before you leave, he speaks in a fake natural tone you can see trough.

“If anything happens, call me, alright?”

“But if someone breaks in shouldn’t I call the police?”

He snorts, “I can’t be serious with you at all, can I?” The answer he got was you sticking your tongue out, making him chuckle. You were so adorable. “Well then, see you tomorrow, dollface.”

The ride back home was him gripping the wheel tightly, his narrowed eyes focused on the road as he thought about his feelings and your health.

“Why dos he has to be so beautiful?! UGH!” He blushes in embarrassment at the thought of your beautiful and goofy smile.

━━━━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━━━━

A week passed shortly after that. Unfortunately, you could feel coughing more and more, along with your weakening form. The medication had somehow calmed the coughing at first, but soon it grew worse. You were worried now, but you tried your best not to let Reiner know about your current health. He was already worried about you— you decided to bear it until the week was over to go to Zeke again.

And that’s how you are here, feeling the incredibly tense and heavy atmosphere in the room along with Zeke and Reiner. There was a silence in the beginning, until Zeke broke it with an unusual look on his eyes. You somehow knew something wasn’t right.

"We don't know what this is, [Name]. This... is different." He speaks with a frown on his face. It’s evident he’s tensed.

"But it isn't that dangerous, right?" You didn't like his tone at all— he looked tensed and uncomfortable. The air was heavier, you can see Reiner getting tensed too.

He stays in silence, like as if he's thinking about what to say— Reiner gets impatient, his foot is constantly tapping the floor, and his fingers move every two seconds. Why he’s taking so long to talk clearly? Reiner grew worried by the second as he thought of the possible answer that Zeke tried to say. 

You, on the other hand, wait patiently. Maybe, just maybe, this is just something not that harmful? Perhaps your illness was advanced but curable, right? There was nothing to worry, right?

"What you have... is— is a terminal illness."

Cold; shivers trough your spine; that's what you feel. As if someone cold hugs your form from behind— your hands freeze, and your eyes widened. You don't know what to feel, so you don't show emotion at all. The truth drops like a bomb— you felt something stung your heart and your stomach churn.

Reiner is the one breaking down. 

He instantly stands on his feet, his hands slamming on Zeke’s desk as he shouts with an horrified expression. "What?! No— this has to be a fucking mistake, Zeke. No, no, no!"

Zeke closes his eyes and sighs, "it isn't. We checked everything – something is happening to [Name], but we don't know what it is."

Reiner doesn’t want to believe that— he refuses. "There has to be something to beat that! There's— There's no way!"

You could see Reiner was frenetic— as he yelled at Zeke and denied the whole statement like a child, but you placed your hand in his arm and tried to calm him. He looks at you, and you notice how heartbroken he looks— but you guide him to sit again, and he obeys nonchalantly.

Looking at Zeke, —who is surprised by your calm demeanor— you quietly ask with dull eyes, "Is there a treatment?"

"We are looking into it."

"I see." You blink, "but what do I exactly have?"

"Your bones are getting weaker— as well as your respiratory system, explaining as to why you cough harshly and you feel your body weak everyday. As I said before, we don’t know what is causing it, but we will do everything we can to help you.”

You doze off after that. Zeke explains things you don’t want to hear— you just stare at him and nod unconsciously. You don’t hear Reiner talking with him, you just... exist. A heavy pain is felt on your chest and shoulders as you think of your future, if you had any. Were you really going to die?

“-understand, [Name]?” That’s Zeke’s voice speaking to you. Blinking, you notice Reiner and Zeke looking at you with their  frowns, and you guess anything they were saying wasn’t good. Clenching your fist, you answer with a short and low yes.

After some checkups and medication, Zeke advises you to go home and rest. You had to come tomorrow, as maybe they will arrange everything for your stay at the hospital. You just stare blankly at him, nodding automatically.

The ride back home is tensed and horribly uncomfortable. Reiner doesn’t exactly know what to say or do as he sees how... blank you look. It has been the first time he has seen you this unresponsive— but knowing the current situation, it’s understandable. He feels something heavy and painful on his chest— he stops his urges to cry and keep it together. He doesn't need to break like that in front of you— he had to be strong, even if he feels something so painful.

He takes your hand and squeezes it, as his other hand is occupied with the wheel. Reiner doesn’t look at you, his eyes fixed on the road.

He can feel your hand squeezing back.

━━━━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━━━━

You tell Reiner to come in— it's evident you don't want to be alone with these... bad news. You want to be with someone, you need someone. How much time do you have left? And not even knowing your soulmate...

Life really is unfair.

As these thoughts cloud your mind, you find yourself chuckling at first, but it grows as an uncontrollable laughter. You take your head with your hands, laughing as Reiner can only watch in pain. He had never seen you like this in his life— not even Annie nor Bertholt. For once, he didn't know what to do to calm you. Placing his hands on your shoulders, the blond tried his best to bring you comfort, to let you know he's there with you.

You break down finally— the laughter stops abruptly as you breath heavily. Your throat hurts, your hands shake, your throat feels itchy. Your whole body feels itchy, and without thinking about it you harshly scratch your throat and arms. If Reiner wasn't there with you to stop your breakdown, maybe you could have hurt yourself really badly. He gets in front of you and takes your hands with his', looking at you with painful eyes. Gritting your teeth, you try not to cry, but the inevitable comes. Hot tears fell from your eyes, and hiccups get out. Sobbing, you can't help but cry harder as you grip tightly Reiner's hands, falling on your knees.

Reiner's eyes began to water unconsciously, and many tears came out from his eyes— as if something is making him cry.

And that someone is you.

He doesn't know how to feel or what to think in this moment— he loves you, and knowing you are soulmates is even better. But how is this found out isn't joyful or happy— it hurts, but that doesn't let him stop loving you.

"[Name]," he speaks, looking at you with narrowed eyes. You can see he's crying too, "we are soulmates."

Immediately stopping crying, your eyes widen and you look at him in disbelief. Just as the tears stop from coming, his tears stop too. It's as if time has stopped in this very moment with that revelation— your breath is caught in your throat and your whole body flinches. You felt sadder, and you cry again with more force than before.

"I—I'm so sorry, Reiner!" You can only say between your sobbing, feeling much more horrible. You were happy that it was him, but you knew there was no happy ending with you. Was this your fault? Why do you exist in the first place?

He shakes his head, smiling sadly at you. Both of you cry, sharing your tears. "Sorry? Babe, you are the person I always wanted."

"I'm gonna die... I'm sorry your soulmate is me!" You can't bear this painful feeling on your chest— you hug him and hide your face on his chest, your body shaking. He welcomes you, wrapping his arms around you tightly. His hand caresses your back in comfort, making you feel tired. Less and less tears come from your eyes, and only some sobs are heard.

"Don't be sorry— we are together in this, alright? You are not alone. I'm with you until the end."

No one moves. The only sounds from that room are Reiner's voice comforting you and your sobs.

━━━━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━━━━

A month passed, and you were currently hospitalized under Zeke's care. You knew he was doing whatever he could to help you, but deep down everyone knew there was no hope for your future. He couldn't tell you when was your death sentence, but he guessed it wouldn't take much longer than three months.

You were really gone. There was no doubt as you couldn't even stand without someone's help— you couldn't walk anymore.

Annie and Bertholt came every weekend to check on you. They were devastated by the horrible news Reiner had to bring them— just as the two of you, they had to believe it with their own eyes. Seeing you in the hospital bed with all of these machines connected in your body wasn't a nice image— it was something they will remember forever, an image that will burn on the back of their minds.

Reiner was always there. He came everyday to take care of you— you felt nothing but a burden to him. He knew how you really felt when your eyes met; it was clear. But every time you felt this burden and guilt, his ridiculous and cheesy behavior appeared: he kissed everywhere; your forehead, your nose, your cheeks, your neck, your hands... it never ceased to amuse you and making you laugh. It was something so childish, but in reality, you didn't mind. Even if you weren't the person you were before, that didn't mean anything to him— you were always going to be the person he will always love.

"I love you." He says, taking your hand and pressing it against his cheek. You chuckle by his behavior, making him blush in embarrassment, but smiles too. "What? Are you laughing at my love confession?"

"You look like a child. Always looking for my affection, hmn? You big baby." The two of you laugh. Caressing his face, your gentle voice say, "I love you."

Reiner was the happiest man alive when he was with you— it was really obvious by the eyes of his two friends. He always talked about you every day as if you were a treasure that nobody could find. It was... bittersweet.

He always was there to wake you up and help you walk trough the hospital's garden. You loved their flowers, and enjoyed it even more when Reiner was with you.

But there was a day when you didn't wake up and see the flowers anymore.

He cried, but there wasn't no one with him to share his tears with.

[welshdragonrawr]

For the “let’s get personal asks”.... all of them?? Please?? I’ll do anything 🙈 ~🍑

Anythiiiiing? That’s a mighty offer. I’ll try to keep these short and simple cuz there’s so many and poor moots will end up suffering a long post on their dash. But if anyone wants a long-winded elaboration on anything, feel free to ask.

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most? This Is Me Trying by Taylor Swift, Landslide by Stevie Nicks, In the End by Linkin Park, Perfect Places by Lorde, Funeral by Phoebe Bridgers, Wasteland Baby by Hozier

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? Sarah Paulson

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.However. Kits is glowering at me. I’m only too aware that...

4: What do you think about most? Life

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say? Your latest [redacted] phone bill is ready. Check it out in your [redacted] account

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on? With 

7: What’s your strangest talent? Writing? It’s my only talent

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence) Girls are incredible. Boys are alright.

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you? Yes

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar? About a month ago

11: Do you have any strange phobias? So many, not sure if they’re full-blown phobias tho

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? No

13: What’s your religion? What’s the name for respecting aspects of a lot but not following one specifically?

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? Walking?

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? Behind

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band? Fleetwood Mac

17: What was the last lie you told? I haven’t got you anything yet

18: Do you believe in karma? Yes

19: What does your URL mean? I used to live in Wales and I’m too stubborn/attached to change it

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength? Insecurity/Loyalty

21: Who is your celebrity crush? Sarah Paulson

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping? No

23: How do you vent your anger? Writing

24: Do you have a collection of anything? Books

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? Neither Phone I think

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become? Yes and No

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love? Metal scratching glass/Sarah Paulson’s voice

28: What’s your biggest “what if”? What if I had never gotten seriously ill when I did

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Yes and Yes

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm. Phone/Blanket

31: Smell the air. What do you smell? Jacket potatoes cooking

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to? [Redacted] Hospital

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast? East?

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender? Hozier?

35: To you, what is the meaning of life? To make the most of the miraculous fact we’re here at all 

36: Define Art. Truth, Beauty, Horror and History 

37: Do you believe in luck? Yes

38: What’s the weather like right now? Grey and overcast

39: What time is it? 1pm

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed? No, so no

41: What was the last book you read? Thin Air by Michelle Paver

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline? No

43: Do you have any nicknames? So many

44: What was the last film you saw? The Princess Diaries

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? Just cuts and bruises so far luckily

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly? Yes

47: Do you have any obsessions right now? Sarah Paulson

48: What’s your sexual orientation? Lesbian

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you? Yes

50: Do you believe in magic? Sometimes

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong? Sometimes

52: What is your astrological sign? Scorpio

53: Do you save money or spend it? Save

54: What’s the last thing you purchased? Car accessories for a xmas present

55: Love or lust? Love

56: In a relationship? ‘It’s complicated’

57: How many relationships have you had? 3 I think?

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue? Yes

59: Where were you yesterday? At home

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you? Flowers

61: Are you wearing socks right now? No

62: What’s your favourite animal? Otter

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you? Kindness

64: Where is your best friend? Too far away

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr. @serawalkerwrites, @sisterxwinters, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @thefandomlesbian, @awildgothappeared

66: What is your heritage? Not much

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM? Reading in bed

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name? Why don’t you ask him?

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off? Yes

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend? Yes

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? Help the dog

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid? a) certain people b) visit my loved ones c) yes

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love. 

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it? Shake it Out by Florence and the Machine

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number? [Redacted]

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship? Communication, Kindness and Care

77: How can I win your heart? Be Kind

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity? Sometimes

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far? Deciding to message the ones who’ve become my closest friends

80: What size shoes do you wear? 5 (european size)

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone? Don’t really know, probably something literary

82: What is your favourite word? Fernweh

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart. Loved ones

84: What is a saying you say a lot? Keep on keeping on

85: What’s the last song you listened to? This Is Me Trying by Taylor Swift

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours? Purple/Red/Blue

87: What is your current desktop picture? Drunk Princess Leia (cover art from Wishful Drinking by Carrie Fisher)

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be? He who shall not be named

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on? What are you truly afraid of?

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do? Go back to sleep probably

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power? Telekinesis?

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? Some time with my Aunt

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? Onset of chronic illness

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be? Florence Welch

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Florida for reasons

96: Do you have any relatives in jail? No

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car? Yes

98: Ever been on a plane? Yes

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say? Be kind to one another. This world is a shitshow right now. Choose to be a good plot twist in it.

That was long, so congrats to anyone who actually sat through/read all that.

[24hour-blues]

all the ones you haven't answered yet? i'm sorry you're sad💙

thank you, that's very sweet. i hope you're doing alright 💛

1. when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? - more milk. i always end up putting too much.

2. do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? - yes

3. what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? - library receipts, post-its, junk mail, pencils

5. are you self-conscious of your smile? - i think it’s one of the few things i’m not self-conscious about, actually. i like my smile.

8. what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? - writing, often poetry but sometimes prose. i like creating playlists, too, and singing.

9. do you like singing/humming to yourself? - yeah, i sing to myself all the time. whatever song i have stuck in my head at the moment.

10. do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? - side, but very occasionally my stomach.

12. what’s your favorite planet? - jupiter

14. if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? - lots of pillows and blankets of all types. succulents and cacti on the windowsills. wooden utensils and dark cabinets in the kitchen. a breakfast bar with stools that don’t match. rugs with funky patterns. a big, soft couch in a bright color that you can sink into. a small balcony with fold-out chairs. rows of mugs and barely any plates. the bathroom crowded with makeup and skin products, writing on the mirror in blue marker. beds never made. a guitar in the corner of the sitting room.

15. go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! - there are more trees on earth than stars in the milky way

16. what’s your favorite pasta dish? - angel hair pasta with puttanesca sauce

18. tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. - i can’t think of anything...

19. do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? - everything. sometimes it’s big things, sometimes small. my fears and what i’m in love with. regrets. shame. hope.

20. what’s your favorite eye color? - grey

21. talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. - idk if it’s really my favorite, but my current backpack took me all through college and it’s good for storing stuff or using as an overnight bag. it’s from timberland and is a nice earthy brown with a flap over the top. lots of pockets.

22. are you a morning person? - i can be

23. what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? - make breakfast and tea. read or watch a movie that makes me rethink everything

25. what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? - a school, i think?

26. what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? - i haven’t had them forever, but i wear my doc martens with everything. i used to wear plain white keds with everything.

27. what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? - winter green

28. sunrise or sunset? - sunrise

30. think of it: have you ever been truly scared? - yes

31. what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. - i like soft, fluffy socks and ones with fun patterns. i love hiking socks. i don’t wear them to sleep tho.

32. tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. - i went to a waffle house at 5am with a friend and some friends of hers i’d just met on her birthday. we were all really drunk, the food took forever, and it tasted awful, but we were happy and laughing.

33. what’s your fave pastry? - probably a cinnamon roll

35. do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? - i like a good calligraphy pen and new notebooks. i don’t use them often; i feel like i don’t have anything important enough to write.

37. do you like keeping your room messy or clean? - it’s usually clean unless i’m not feeling well. sometimes i get disorganized.

38. tell us about your pet peeves! - overlapping conversations. people interrupting others. loud mouth noises, like chewing or licking. people criticizing my driving. nitpicky comments on my clothes or how i look. being talked about.

39. what color do you wear the most? - black, probably.

41. what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? - how it feels to float by helena fox

42. do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! - nope

43. who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? - i’m not sure

44. when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? - i can’t remember

45. do you trust your instincts a lot? - not really

46. tell us the worst pun you can think of. - i can’t remember it but something about pigeons and being coo-l

47. what food do you think should be banned from the universe? - bacon. i just wanna make people angry.

48. what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? - my dad told me a story once, about when i was a kid. he said that he and i were walking together near the lake in the neighborhood across from mine. i was holding his hand, and i said to him that this was the happiest time in my life because i wouldn't be the same when i grew out of being a child. i think i have the same fear now--that i'll never be that happy again.

49 do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

- i like records but i only have one. it's an album by ccr. i really like them

50. what’s an odd thing you collect?

- beer bottle caps

52. what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

- maybe those "girl..." text posts that just say stupid shit

53. have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

- watched them all but pulp fiction. i don't really remember heathers at all

55. what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

- lets not talk about that

57. go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

- not in the mood sorry

58. who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? - bri is wine mom. quincy and i are vodka aunt.

60. do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

- yes but i rarely remember favorites. i read so much and feel it then forget all the words

61. what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

- someone gave me a rock once. i get too nervous to give stupid gifts

62. do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

- orange or cranberry

63. are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

- i'm more fussy about music than books, but i do like my books organized. i like them worn in and well-read tho, not in perfect shape.

64. what color is the sky where you are right now?

- a fuzzy, light blue-grey. it's snowing

65. is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

- a few

66. what would your ideal flower crown look like?

- lots of green leaves in all different shapes and sizes. tiny white and blue flowers.

67. how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

- isolated and insignificant. safe

68. what’s winter like where you live?

- cold, grey, snowy.

69. what are your favorite board games?

- idk if i really too many board games. maybe cranium. i like puzzles more

71. what’s your favorite kind of tea?

- honey vanilla chamomile

72. are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

- yea and even then i forget.

73. what are some of your worst habits?

- i give up too easily

74. describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

- excitable. emotional. so very smart. creative as all hell. self-conscious where they shouldn't be. never runs out of words in the best way. loves to share.

75. tell us about your pets!

- my dog shiver is turning into a little old man, but he still acts like a puppy. he likes attention and whines to communicate. he'll greet you at the door and put his front paws on your thighs to say hi. follows you all around the house. loves to cuddle.

- my pigeon spirit is young and vocal. she coos for attention. when i go to sleep, she grunts every time i move to ask where i am and if i'm okay. i take showers with her and sit on the tile; she puffs up right into my side and sticks her wings out for me to splash water on her. she likes to be close to me to get neck scritches and push her head into my neck and preen every bit of me she can.

76. is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

- a lot probably

77. pink or yellow lemonade?

- limeade

78. are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

- i dunno they're cute

80. what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

- it's white wallpaper with pink roses along the top and ribbons of pink and green striped vertically. my mom chose it before i was born.

81. describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

- they sort of remind me of dark water where everything is reflected back in it--not just the sky but the trees and people walking--and they make you want to look closer because you know there's something in there, it's not just a reflection, like flat glass. but it's hidden until you dio your hand in the pictures broken.

82. are/were you good in school?

- pretty good

83. what’s some of your favorite album art?

- i don't look at albums

85. do you read comics? what are your faves?

- not really, but watchmen is one of my favorites.

86. do you like concept albums? which ones?

- dunno

88. are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

- um. idrk. i like whatever monet was doing.

91. where do you plan on traveling this year?

- maybe michigan

92. are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

- i like cheese

93. what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

- i just kind of. let it do whatever.

94. who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

- my uncle

95. what are your plans for this weekend?

- honestly have no clue

96. do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

- put them off until windows tells me it's restarting the computer in five minutes

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

- mb

98. when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

- in college with jacob, although i wouldn't really call it joking. we just walked through a state park. it was beautiful.

100. if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

- idk. i feel like i'd make the same mistakes if i went back, but the future scares me.

[roseamongroses]

Antithesis: “the tiniest life boat...full of people I know”

[Specific-Summary]: They should expect growing pains. For not everything to feel right or make sense. That doesn’t mean it’ll always hurt, nor does it mean they can’t have fun along the way. It’s senior year. Everything may be different. It won’t be senior year for long. Everything will be okay.

[General Warnings]: Implied Emotional Abuse, Implied Physical Abuse, Bad Parents are Bad Parents, Mild Sexual Content/jokes,Mentioned Homophobia, Mentions of underage drinking (backround), Some Catcalling,Cursing , Self Hate,implied pregnancy talk/inability to become pregnant, adults arguing where the “kid” can hear it, adults drinking,

[Tags/mood:] highschool au,  fluff and angst but its all good, chat fic, teen stress, its flordia no snow we die like men [Pairing:] Roceit (Roman Sanders/ Deceit Sanders), hinted future/possible logince/roloceit/loceit [Characters]Roman Sanders/Deceit (Dmitri) Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Logan Sanders, Patton Sanders, Remy (Sleep) Sanders, Nate Sanders, Dragon Witch (Diana) Remus “The Duke” Sanders (minor/brief)

(Ao3) (Previously) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15)(16) (17) (18) (19)

(20) (21)

Lo:W Lo: Why Lo:Why are babies like this

Rem: you mean disgusting right?

R: stop shading them when they can’t even defend themselves

Remy: AM I WRONG THO

Dm: Yes.

Remy: fuck you Remy: you cannot tell me the wiggling, crying, shitting masses are adorable Remy: it's PROPAGANDA.

Dm: I’m pretty sure you just described yourself drunk

Rem: fuck. you. pretty. boy.

Dm: Aw you think I’m pretty?

R: why can’t you guys be nice to each other :,(

Dm: you told logan to eat ass like ten minutes ago so

Rem:and aren’t you like putting pink glitter on all of virgil’s clothes

R: hey hEY HEY I NEVER CLAIMED TO BE NICE

R: I SAID BE NICE TO E ACH OTHER.

R: anyway how are my favorite twins

L: Terrible. L: Arlo’s crying bc we wouldn’t let her eat a charger

L: Louie is determined to fling himself off of random objects

R: i love them.

Dm: Roman no.

R: roman yes.

L: And my parents are getting the Look again L: I swear to god they’re planning for another

R: ew ew no not that put that back

R: your parents are so sweet i doNT WANT TO THINK ABOUT THAT

Rem: i will never get overr how Rem: those horny ass hippies made actual old man logan

L: Neither Will I

Dm: Why diI

Something crashed.

The sound splintered the silence of the home and Dmitri stilled. He eyed his partly opened door, not daring to breathe.

He’d been sent to his room for most of the day while his “birthday” preparations were underway. It was mainly for show, but Dr. Montag seemed genuinely excited about the occasion. He’d always seemed excited about “family” things, and Dmitri had gotten to the point where it no longer felt...as threatening.

Sure, he wasn’t going to be calling him dad or uncle anytime--ever, but it was a nicer way of looking at family events then what he was used to. And what was he used to?

“What are you fucking stupid?” his aunt said, her voice booming throughout the house riddled with accusation.

Dmitri felt the rising panic in his throat and he tried to make himself smaller---quieter.

He eyed the open door like the stupid mistake it was.

Following this came softer apologies. Dr. Montag’s voice unclear, but concerned.

That brief moment didn’t last as his aunt lashed out again, “No--No-No! I will not be fucking shushed. This is my house, who do you think you are?” she said.

As if to emphasize her point she got even louder, “ What do you think this is? A game? You think we can play the house and make it work? No, I need commitment, not this---Don’t you dare try to bring that fucking parasite into this.” Dmitri heard stomping down the hall, getting closer, and she hissed, “It has to be perfect--You promised me we would be perfect--”

Her voice dropped, soft whimpers following.

“Patty please, the doctors said--”

“I don’t care what the doctors said, you're just… you’re just trying to make excuses--” She was hiccuping, her voice becoming more strangled, “I doubt you even love me. You said you wanted to keep trying, but now you're scared? What kind of man are you? What would my father think? If you don’t want to get married just say so you poor excuse for a gold digger.”

Silence.

No crying, no screaming, only silence.

Minutes later, he heard the front door close. Minutes after that he heard his aunt’s bedroom door slam.

Minutes later, Dmitri could be more bothered he supposed.

He could be more alarmed at the wave of nothingness he felt draining away at him. But he wasn’t sure what he had to be emotional about. His aunt? Sure he had constant guilt about anything to do with her, but nothing that ever made him feel like something wasn’t clicking.

Like something was just out of reach, so close, but now it was gone.

He went to tend to his plants. He maneuvered around the shattered glass, ignoring the birthday decor that will probably be unceremoniously trashed now that his aunt no longer had a fiance to show off--and no longer had a potential child to boast either.

She would never hear the end of it from his grandfather, he assumes, so in turn, he will never hear the end of it from her.

As he was picking his way through his tools and eyeing the nursery plants, he noticed a flat, wrapped box, knocked off one of the patio tables. It's tag clearly labeled with his name in fancy cursive script.

He glanced back at the house, fingers skimming the edge of the obnoxiously bright wrapping paper and carefully peeling it apart, hoping the creaking sounds weren’t as loud as they sounded in his head.

Inside where a pair of yellow gloves, gardening gloves, and a note.

---

Dear Dmitri,

I know I’ve only been in your life for a short amount of time, but I’m glad your aunt and I have decided to make it work. I’m glad to have met you.

I may not know your situation, I may not know you, but I’m going to trust my gut on this. You’re a sweet, smart kid with a promising future in anything you set your mind to. I hope you trust me enough to help you with exploring that future. I’ve always wanted a family, and I know that your aunt hopes to build one too.

Happy 18th birthday! Let’s hope for 18 more :)

-

Happy 18th birthe for 18 more :)

-

birthy! Let’s hope f8

- Lets hope f -

hope

----

Dmitri’s vision blurred, the paper’s ink becoming smudged and he tucked it away, shaking. Tears rolled down his face quickly and the more he tried to stop the more they came.

His throat was tight. He couldn’t breathe---his grip was tight on his shirt as if it would steady him but he couldn’t--he couldn’t---

He fumbled for his phone, the box hitting the ground sometime in between as he sank to the ground, hitting the first number in the contact list.

He needed to hear someone--god anyone. The dial tone felt like an eternity, each ring feeling a hammer to the chest.

Then finally he heard a click.

Then he heard a voice he hadn’t heard in a long time. Sure it was deeper, more assured, but at the end of the day, it was still---

“Emile?” Dmitri said, crying even harder.

---

@daflangstlairde

@ace-anx

@cataclysm-al

[bayside-smoking-blues]

So, can you tell how would go Lesbians!JyuJiro, Fem!Jyuto x Jiro and Jyuto x fem!Jiro 🤔

Yep! It’s gonna be kinda long (lol, "kinda”) so I’ll put it under the cut!

Lesbians!JyuJiro

Jyuko (how I’ll call fem!Jyuto) would be a real femme fatale. The kind of woman who rocks suits with a skirt and high heels. Her boobs aren’t so big, but have a beautiful shape and she knows how to dress in a way that values them without being inappropriate for her work. Her glasses give her an intelectual look that only makes her more attractive.

Fem!Jiro is a tomboy, she likes to dress more masculine clothes, one or two sizes bigger than hers, and is sometimes mistaken for a boy. She’s a beautiful girl tho, and she caught Jyuko’s eyes from the beginning.

The first time they met was bc Jiro was sent to the police station for hitting some guys who were assaulting her. She deffended herself as she could, hitting them with her bag (that was full of books) and two of them ended up in the hospital. When she was sent to the station, Jyuko asked what happened, and after hearing her story she smirked and said that she wouldn’t stain her record bc Jiro didn’t do anything wrong, neither she would call her parents. She told Jiro she could leave, and also said “I like girls who can take care of themselves,” and that was it, if Jiro hadn’t fallen for Jyuko yet, now she did.

Jiro started to go to the blocks around the police station only so she could see Jyuko, even if from a distance. Soon Jyuko noticed she had a “stalker” and caught Jiro by surprise one day and called her to go to a Cafe nearby. They talked, and even tho Jiro was nervous at first, they ended up getting alone really well, and exchanged their contacts so they could talk through line. They started dating not too long after.

Jyuko treated Jiro like a princess despite her looking more like a prince. She didn’t get tired of teasing her tho, and she loved to make her blush. Jiro couldn’t believe she was dating an older woman, and someone as gorgeous as Jyuko. Saburo would mock her, saying she had a mother complex, but Ichiro was supportive of her relationship bc he trusted Jyuko to be a decent person especially after helping Jiro in the first time they met. (no, he didn’t know she was a corrupt cop, only that she was a cop)

Like with my JyuJiro hc, Jyuko would also wait for Jiro to be 18 before getting sexual with her, no matter how many times Jiro told her she was ready before that. 

They couldn’t see each other much during weekdays bc of Jyuko’s work and Jiro’s school, but they would have dates every weekend.

fem!Jyuto/Jiro

When Jiro saw Jyuko for the first time it was love at first sight. He had never seen a woman so gorgeous before. He knew he was too young, was sure that someone like her would never want to be with a brat like him, but he couldn’t give up without trying… or at least could do something to be able to see her more often.

He purposefully graffited a wall near the police station, so he would be sent there and could see her. It worked. And when she was talking to him he could barely “hear” her words bc he was too busy focusing on the sound of her voice, and admiring how beautiful she was. Until she finally told him that she would call the one responsible for him. Panicking with the idea of Ichiro knowing what he did he soon changed his attitude and begged her to not do that. She smirked to him and he feel threatened but also like he was gonna have a boner in the middle of the station. She started talking again. “Okay boy, listen. It was your first offense so I’ll let you go for today, but under one condition: you’re gonna be my personal assistent for the week.”

He couldn’t believe how lucky he was. He would “work” for Jyuko for a week, doing odd jobs and easy stuff like bringing her coffee and keeping her office tidy. During that time they would talk a lot, and Jyuko decided she liked that boy. A lot. She started to tease him too, and say things like “such a handsome boy like you must have a girlfriend, right? No? The girls in your school are so blind…” and would love to see how Jiro would get embarrassed.

After the end of that week, Jiro confessed to her, and told her he only did what he did bc he wanted to see her. She thought he was adorable, and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Come look for me after you graduate,” she said. 

And one year later he showed up at the station offering her the second button of his uniform and asking her out for a date. She accepted, and they started dating.

Jyuto/fem!Jiro

Jyuto despised guys who would “go out” with high school girls bc of their perversions. Dirty motherfuckers should be alone rotting in jail. So he felt really bad with himself, and compared himself with those dirty assholes, when he noticed he had fallen for the young Jiro, a tomboy girl he saved from an armed robbery once, and that continued to come back to the station from time to time for no reason other than to see him. Of course, she didn’t tell him that, she came with excuses like “someone stole my ID” and “I saw a guy drawing on the wall,”, but Jyuto could see in her heterochromatic eyes that she was there for him.

He thought it was cute, and when she started talking to him about random subjects he would talk to her too, thinking there was nothing wrong with letting a girl in love spend some time with the object of her desire, nothing could go wrong with that. He even accepted her invitation to go grab some coffee in the Cafe nearby.

Until he noticed he was getting infatuated too.

After that he started to avoid her, be more dry to her. When she finally confronted him with an angry face, asking what she did wrong and why he disliked her so much, he told her that it was the contrary. He liked her too much, but it would be wrong to be with her. She jumped on him, hugging him tightly and didn’t let him go until he hugged her back. She didn’t care if it was wrong, she loved him and wanted to be with him, and if he felt the same there was no reason for them not to date. Screw what the world would think. Jyuto smiled sadly, thinking how naively beautiful youth was, a time they could believe in love wins all. He withdrew from her and told her he would rather continue having the kind of relationship they had, something akin to a friendship, but they could meet on the weekends, go on a few dates, but he swore he wouldn’t touch her until she was 18. She accepted his condition and jumped on him again, and asked him for a kiss. He was afraid to kiss her, he thought it would feel wrong, but it felt right, he was sure he loved her now.

They started dating and Jyuto went to her house to talk to her older brother, to explain his intentions. Ichiro wasn’t so happy to have her precious younger sister with an older guy, and made it clear that if he hurt her, he would kill him. Jyuto assured Ichiro that he would never harm Jiro, with Jiro yelling from the other room that if Jyuto dared to hurt her she would kick him in the balls bc she can defend herself without her brother’s help, thank you very much.

Jyuto chuckled. He really loved Jiro’s strong personality.

[winchester-barnes]

It Happened

Summary: After getting married a couple years ago, you find out that you’re pregnant. And Bucky will be pissed. ..... Maybe?

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Just one swear word, super mild daddy angst at the beginning😂, pregnancy, lots and lots of crying.

A/N: Just my second fic, so be understanding if it sucks, y’all. It’s so cute tho.

Frustration sounds like a soon-to-be dad trying to install a carseat. Bucky has been working with that thing for two hours now and only has it halfway figured out. I know better than to ask him if I can help because he made this his mission, but I’m very tempted to ask anyway. Actually, since we found out that we were expecting Bucky made many things his mission, including installing the carseat into our truck by himself and painting the nursery walls and putting all of the extra baby essentials together with me; he’s accomplished almost every mission now. His nesting senses have been as strong as and at times stronger than mine, and it’s absolutely adorable. Truthfully, I was scared when I learned that I was pregnant. Not scared for myself but scared because of Bucky… I didn’t know how he would react to it; I was afraid that he would be against it and even furious about it. I laugh about it when I think back on it now, but at the time we hadn’t talked seriously about kids—just nonchalantly tossed the idea around every now and then in casual conversation, so I was scared to death leading up to when Bucky found out.

●

He came home from the complex after a day of training and was in good spirits, and I remember thinking how inconvenient the serum was in the aspect of keeping blood levels at absolute normal, meaning I couldn’t get him insanely drunk and then tell him about the baby. We settled in the living room on the couch for a Fresh Prince of Bel-Air marathon while we ate supper. I was so nervous about the news I was going to have to tell Bucky that I barely ate anything, instead I just absentmindedly picked around at the food on my plate with my fork and took only a few bites of it.

“What’s on your mind, Y/N?” Bucky asked, noticing my odd behavior.

Bucky’s sudden questioning frightened me and I dropped my fork, and the sound of the fork on the glass plate brought me out of my distracted, worried trance. I looked Bucky in the face and tried my best to smile like normal, but he seen right through it. Bucky has always called my bluff more often than I would like him to, but he does it because he knows me better than that.

Something in my fake expression must’ve changed or something because Bucky turned the TV off and set his finished plate down on the coffee table. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” he prompted, sounding more concerned, as he turned his whole body towards me and took both of my hands in his. I remember staring into his eyes and feeling tears come into my own eyes as the image of the seven positive pregnancy tests flashed into my mind. Tears rolled down my face as fast as they continued to well in my eyes, and Bucky wiped them away gently before I just let myself fall into his chest and his shirt soaked them up instead. I fought the lump in my throat as long as I could, but I let myself fall apart eventually because despite the news I had yet to tell him, I felt safe in Bucky’s arms. He let me bawl for a solid ten minutes, just holding me, rubbing my back and stroking my hair. I finally calmed myself down enough to lift my head from Bucky’s chest and look at him again, but I wasn’t done crying. He went back to wiping the tears from my face as he stared at me, so confused but so loving.

“Now, can you tell me what’s wrong?” he coaxed easily, pushing my hair behind my ears so he could see my face better.

I couldn’t find my voice at first, but after I did find it I couldn’t form a coherent sentence for a minute. Bucky continued to hold me and dry my face while I blubbered something mostly inaudible about the baby, but he did catch the word “sorry” in my weepy mumbling.

“‘Sorry?’” Bucky repeated. “What’re you sorry for? Or…what is it that I should be sorry for?”

I remained silent for another minute or so before accepting the fact that there was no way around the inevitable. In almost an instant after giving in to what I’d been trying to avoid, I got a grip on myself. I wiped my face with the front of my shirt and blew my nose a few times with tissues from the Kleenex box Bucky handed me, and then I took a deep breath. Immediately, after opening my eyes at the end of my deep breath, I felt even more tears form in my eyes, but I wasn’t going to break down and cry like that again. Not at that moment anyway, I decided. Bucky’s calmness usually helps calm me down, but at that time it didn’t help at all as it only put me more on edge.

“Come with me, James,” I said as I took Bucky’s hand and got up off the couch. He followed me from the living room to the laundry room without asking anymore questions until we got to the sink and stopped. There are still some things Bucky doesn’t know or understand about today’s world—phrases, music, objects, etc.—and pregnancy tests were one of those things at the time.

He looked down into the sink cluelessly at what laid in front of him and then just look back at me.

“What’re these? And what’s wrong? You still haven’t answered that question,” Bucky remarked.

“They’re pregnancy tests, James,” I replied dryly, still fighting tears and another lump in my throat. “And they’re positive. All seven of them.” Nothing truly clicked in Bucky’s mind right off the bat, but I watched as reality or something like it washed over him after a moment.

“Positive,” he said, drawing a breath. “That means yes. And these are pregnancy tests. They are positive tests… That’s what all those pink lines and blue plus signs mean, isn’t it?” I nodded my head yes.

“So you’re trying to tell me…that you are pregnant,” stuttered Bucky. “Right?” I nodded my head yes again and let my tears roll for the second time. I fell back against the wall and slid down till my butt hit the floor, legs tucked in to my chest, my head buried behind my knees, and I was sobbing. I was prepared for any reaction that was about to follow the news except for the reaction I actually got.

Without a word, Bucky knelt down and gently unfolded me. He pretty much wrapped my body around his and picked me up off the floor like a parent does with an upset child. Bucky stood me up after holding me for a few seconds and dried my face yet again but this time with one of his clean shirts from the basket of clothes I had sitting on the table next to the sink.

“What’s with all of this?” he inquired. “Why all this crying? Aren’t you happy, Y/N?”

I practically froze mid-sob and looked him in the eyes. “Are you happy?” I questioned hesitantly. And it was then that I seen tears in his eyes too, but they weren’t tears of fear like mine were, as the smile on his face made that very evident.

“Of course I am, doll!” Bucky exclaimed. “A baby! We’re gonna have a baby!”

I hadn’t quite yet been able to process what was going on at that point, so I continued to talk cautiously. “Yes… Are you not mad or anything?”

Bucky’s happy tears streamed down his face as he answered me. “No, I’m not mad or anything. Why would I be mad about this?”

I forced myself to loosen up some in Bucky’s grip because my body was sore from all of that crying and from being tense with worry all day because Bucky was obviously handling it far better than I thought he would.

“We haven’t had a serious talk about having kids yet and you’re busy with work at the complex and for a while you worried about whether or not you could even make babies.”

Bucky hadn’t thought much about that last issue I mentioned because it made him pretty sad, I would find out.

“Well, it looks like I can make babies. I honestly thought I was sterile due to the serum because Natasha is sterile due to her serum, and our serums I thought were the same but they must be different. But that’s the reason why we started doing it without any contraceptives, remember?” I thought back on what Bucky was talking about and did indeed remember that.

“And as far as work goes,” Bucky continued, “I can start taking it easier so that way I’m home more. Most of everything I do there is on my own accord. And for what isn’t on my own accord, I’m sure Tony will be flexible with me to some extent.”

“What about the no talk about having kids part?” I asked.

“I know we never truly talked about having kids at any point other than just pretty much joking about the scenario sometimes, but I did want to have kids,” confessed Bucky. “I never wanted to talk seriously about it anyway because thinking about me not being able to make babies with you made me sad… It frustrated me because I figured you wanted to have a family of our own as much as I did and I was afraid I couldn’t give it to you. I just thought that if it happened, it happened, and if it didn’t, it just didn’t.” He stopped right there and tears of joy continued to fall from his blue eyes. Bucky knelt down in front of me again, but this time it was to lift my shirt and kiss my belly that was still practically flat. “And it’s happened,” he murmured with his face hugged up to my belly and his arms wrapped around my lower back.

“How have you been feeling?” Bucky asked looking up at me. “Because I’ve heard it can be rough.”

“I’ve been feeling really great actually. Pregnancy is different for every woman, and so far I’m only of the lucky few who doesn’t suffer,” I replied honestly. 

“Good! I hope it stays easy for you. Do you know how far along you are?” he questioned further. 

I shifted my gaze from Bucky to my belly as if I actually thought I could guess based on how I looked, but realized I had no clue. “I don’t know for sure, but thinking back… I missed my last cycle a couple of weeks ago and that’s what made me suspicious, but then I also missed the one before that, which I originally wrote off as just an irregular month because I’ve dealt with irregular cycles since I was younger, but I could’ve been pregnant then because we started having unprotected sex three or four months ago. But guessing off of that, I’m not going to be any further along than eleven or twelve weeks. We need to go to the doctor to find out for sure.”

Bucky simply nodded and smiled. He kissed my belly one more time before standing back up and looking into the sink again. “So, how do these work anyway? How do these little sticks know that you’re pregnant?” he asked, reaching to grab one of them.

I caught his hand before he got ahold of one and laughed. “You only wanna touch one end of those things, sweetheart, so careful which end you grab,” I say in between laughs. “I peed on all of the ends that are pointing down and something that has to do with science lets it know if the test is negative or positive. I don’t know how to explain it very well, that’s the best I got. But if you still want to pick one up, grab this end,” I said, pointing at the handle-end of a test.

That blew Bucky’s mind in a cool and disgusting way, which was made evident by his facial expressions as I explained it to him. He picked one up anyway and looked at it closer and smiled, then another, and then one more. Those three satisfied him enough and he left the rest of them alone. “So, did you…did you pee on them here in the laundry room sink or…,” Bucky joked, on the verge of laughter.

“No,” I replied simply, commencing the laughter. “Where I was scared of telling you, I put them in the sink in here so that way you wouldn’t see them in the sink or even the trashcan in our bathroom after you got home from the complex.” Bucky just rolled his eyes and grinned as he pulled me in for a kiss.

●

“I got it!” thunders Bucky as he enters the house. “The carseat is in the truck and we are ready for this baby!” The proud smile I see on his face as he enters our room is reward enough. “Did you get your hospital bag packed, babe?”

“I got it packed and the diaper bag, too,” I answer. “Want me to pack your hospital bag or do you wanna pack it, James?”

“How about you just lay there on our bed and watch while I pack my bag?” he asks, pulling me as close to him as possible and rubbing my now large nine-month belly. “Because it’s likely that I will forget something if I’m unsupervised, so I need you here to make sure that I don’t forget anything.”

“I can do that,” I chime as I take my spot on our bed and try to make myself comfortable, which is next to impossible. I look on as Bucky begins removing clothes from his dresser, taking enough of each article of clothing to equal three outfits that range from thick sweatpants and a hoodie to shorts and a shirt that he’s cut the sleeves off of. Temperatures don’t bother him thanks to the serum, but he dresses like a normal man that doesn’t have super soldier serum pulsing through him because it helps him not feel like a freak.

As he moves about our room swiftly, glancing at me every few seconds with suggestive eyes but an innocent smile, I realize that my eyes are beginning to dart to objects around Bucky that I see when I watch him. The diaper bag stuffed full of everything we will need and a lot of things that we probably won’t use, my hospital bag (which is bigger than Bucky’s bag) zipped up all neat and ready to go, the small co-sleeping bed attached to our bed… 

“James…,” I mutter slowly. The ferocious manner in which Bucky turns away from his bag and rushes to my side made me realize that I sounded a bit too dramatic there without meaning to. “Nothing’s wrong! I’m sorry, love. I was just going to ask you what in the actual hell is happening right now?”

Bucky drops his head and sighs with relief, then he starts to laugh. His crisp smile is soothing. “I’ve asked myself that question today too. It’s all really crazy, I know,” he utters breathily. “There’s a carseat in our truck, there’s a room in our house that’s dedicated to someone who isn’t even here yet and won’t truly use it very much for a little while, there’s a little bed attached to our big bed for a little human that we’re worried about hurting in our sleep, and that right there is a diaper bag full of diapers and clothes and bottles and pacifiers and small towels that you keep calling burp cloths and who knows what else.” Bucky laughs again and takes a deep breath. I don’t think Bucky has ever talked this much at one time.

“And if I know you, your hospital bag right there is loaded with your phone charger, your lemon sorbet flavored chapstick, that deodorant you like because it doesn’t leave white marks on your shirts, the army green headband thing that doubles as a scarf that I got you last month, probably like seven hair ties, three pairs of regular socks plus one pair of thick wool socks, that really cute shirt Wanda gave you as a baby shower gift that you plan on wearing when you have the baby, your good camera, three pairs of my sweatpants because yours are too small on you right now, three of my t-shirts because you can’t fit your own, probably just one of my hoodies because you can’t fit into your own hoodies right now either, your toothbrush and our toothpaste, and your hairbrush. And I know of other things in that bag, but I’m just not going to talk about them. Other things women need for when they have a baby.”

I giggled while Bucky rambled after I lightened up, but now I’m just laughing with him. I’m not entirely sure why all of that was so funny, but both of us are howling and in tears. I haven’t laughed this hard since the baby shower Laura threw for me at the Barton farm during which Bucky opened a basketful of hilarious gag gifts that all of the ladies pulled together for him before he and the rest of the guys all went outside to drink and play horseshoes. My favorite gift in that basket, which wasn’t really one of the true gag gifts, was a t-shirt that had “Man behind the bump” and two thumbs up printed on it. I later found out that that shirt was actually from Clint and Laura put it in the basket for him. Bucky is going to wear that shirt to the birthing center tomorrow.

In the midst of our laughter, Bucky and I catch each other’s eyes and held eye contact. Our laughing fades slowly the longer we gaze, waning from belly laughs to soft chuckles then to nothing. We are still smiling but we are silent, just relishing in one another in the moment. But, of course, the baby wouldn’t miss an opportunity to get some attention too. I grab both of Bucky’s hands as soon as I feel the baby start to move and lay them on my belly over where the baby was moving. There is nothing any purer than Bucky and his unmatched excited happiness when he gets to feel the baby move. The looks on Bucky’s face and the way he rubs and kisses my belly and how he talks to the baby, it all just absolutely melts my heart. I think Bucky may have bump withdrawals after the baby is born, silly as that sounds. Throughout this whole pregnancy, Bucky has told me at least twice a day how gorgeous I am with a baby belly and he hasn’t been able to stay off of it, bless his loving heart. I have thoroughly enjoyed being pregnant mainly because I got to see a side of Bucky that I didn’t even know existed and it is the most beautiful thing.

●

Our first night as a family of three. And endless thanks to whoever decided to get these huge beds for the birthing center because I wanted to cuddle and sleep with Bucky so bad after not being able to do either of those things for the two nights in a row that I was in labor. Forty-nine hours of unadulterated torture known as labor left me unable to sleep, and the only cuddling we done during those forty-nine hours—which wasn’t even cuddling at all—was when I actually had the baby. He held me strong and steady through it all; he kept me strong and steady through it all. I could not have done it without Bucky, I know I couldn’t have. The only times Bucky left my side was when he had to use the bathroom, that was it, and even for those short amounts of time he hated leaving me. And when the nurses would bring him snacks, he wouldn’t take or eat them in front of me because I was avoiding eating except for when they made me eat a pack of peanut butter crackers. Bucky was my saving grace.

Grant James Barnes. Named after his Uncle Steve and his daddy. It’s crazy to think that he wasn’t here twenty-four hours ago, and now he’s here and sleeping sound in my arms as we sit here and do nothing but gaze at him. All seventeen inches of Grant arrived ‪at 3:09‬ earlier this morning weighing six pounds and eleven ounces and just exactly like his dad. Headful of black hair, electric blue eyes that I bet money will stay blue, a dimpled chin, long skinny fingers, and monster-sized feet for a newborn. Grant’s shoulders are even broad…as a newborn. That’s what gave me the most trouble during his birth. He got stuck at his shoulders and it took me almost too long to push him out past his shoulders. Bucky apologized for giving our son massive shoulders while I was pushing and then laughed it. That was the only time through labor and delivery that I actually thought about elbowing Bucky in the balls but decided against it because, my goodness, I needed that man more than I needed anything and I probably would’ve cried about hurting him later.

“Look what we made,” Bucky whispers before kissing the top of my head. “You done a great job. I couldn’t have done what you did.

I avert my eyes from my son to my husband. “I couldn’t have done any of it without you, James. None of it. Thank you for staying with me and for keeping me going when I wanted to give up.”

Bucky plants a gentle, intimate kiss on my lips and smiles. “I love you, Mrs. Barnes. I love you beyond comprehension. I thought I loved you beyond comprehension yesterday, but watching you go through everything within the past twenty-four hours has made me love you so, so much more. I don’t see how I could love you anymore, but I know I’ll love you more tomorrow more than I love you right now. Even without a rough labor and then giving birth to our son, my love for you grows every day. It always has and it always will.”

I blink rapidly to keep the tears in my eyes from falling but it doesn’t really help. “I’m with you till the end of the line. I will love you through it all. I love you more than you will ever know, James Barnes. And now Grant too. I will love the both of you with more than every fiber of my being till the end of time. Forever and for always.”

[podcastmecaptain]

the stim bin

part of advanced PLACEMENT: an ars PARADOXICA high school au about a gang of queer teen nerds, by @estherroberts​ , @podcastmecaptain , and @lizzieraindrops

all three of the aformentioned dorks are equally responsible for the hijinks found in this post. today as well all three aforementioned dorks are neurodivergent folks writing about neurodivergent folks.

click here for the au masterpost | track #ars placement for updates!

ALSO: things aren’t always showing up in the tags, so your most reliable bet is the aforementioned masterpost.

attention: all contents incredibly neurodivergent

everyone shares those fidget cubes

collectively they have like five

in so many colors

esther also designs a giant version that’s like. the size of a KEYBOARD and with lots more options and Bigger

jack builds it

they call it the stimboard deluxe

anthony has nintendo

sally brings him all her childhood games and watches him hyperfocus

sally and anthony were the first autistic friend each other had and they love sharing weird stuff from their childhoods that nobody else liked

they have a lot of overlap of interests and they spent so long without anyone like them who really got them

and they both feel so safe and loved not only with each other but with the whole gang because everyone’s neurodiv af even if they’re not sure in exactly what way

anthony brings notes everywhere

scribble scribble

Doing The Right Thing, Doing Science For Good is sort of his ruling philosophy

a lot of times it’s really easy to lead him down the wrong path if he thinks it’s Science For Good

he has some problems with gullibility

the pressure stimming is too real

PRESSURE! STIM! HUGS!

Big Coats or Lab Coats

fiddling with his glasses

he’s bad at artistic/creative things and just doesn’t get it. he can follow a pattern tho,

polish patterns work for him, especially with tape. he likes taking care of his nails because he’s v tactile, he likes the smooth feeling of the polish and likes tapping his nails

he either gets really anxious or angry about Bad things

breakdowns, breaking things, and weirdly quick recoveries

he could hug people for hours

he usually does if he’s had a panic attack, but other than that acts like he’s fine

canon says sally eats weird and has a disturbing appetite so like,

sally separating EVERY SINGLE FOOD by group and flavor and texture and then like putting one piece of one in her mouth at a time and keeps TALKING CAUSE SHE’S A DORK

other options:

SHREDS EVERYTHING AND EATS IT WITH A STRAW

eats only EXACTLY one quarter of anything at a time and forgets the rest

uses her hands for THINGS SHE SHOULD NOT

burnt things

she love the Cronch

puts things together that should not even touch

jack cries the day he sees her dip pickles in whipped cream and shove a fistful of blue cheese blissfully into her mouth immediately after that

sally’s special interests:

electronics, gadgets, tinkering, SCIENCE, beginning quantum physics, computers

stims by tinkering and uses voice recordings for vocal stims, plays with her hair and bites her nails, spinning, dancing, tapping tools

hands on everything

the dancing is so bad and uses her full body (it’s actually so cute)

is a bad driver bc she either hyperfocuses on the road or she starts TALKING and gets lost in anything BUT driving

sally wears her lab coat everywhere

she plays with the seams, runs the fabric between her fingers, tugs on the corners of it to create pressure on her shoulders

sometimes she spins in a circle just to let the fabric flap behind her like a cape

tags on clothing are EVIL

she takes them out with a seam ripper till there’s no traces

sallys clothes are always a little large and odd bc if they’re not comfy she Dies

no really she’ll end up in a ball somewhere crying because of sensory grossness

she has serious sensory processing issues

sometimes it’s really a Drag but she loves fiddling with things so much and it feels so good and she wouldn’t give it up for the world

she has a watch that sometimes she’ll make clicking noises along with the tick tick tick tick

lots more under the readmore!

sally is the queen of weighted blankets

she always has one readily accessible in case she needs to wrap up in it

the gang Knows this and they’re always asking her to borrow one

like one time esther texts sally like “help me im having sensory issues and i need hugs”

and sally turns up with not one but TWO heavy blankets

(she may have fallen over once or twice trying to carry both of them)

(just these two lil scurrying feet on skinny legs goin patpatpatpat supporting this huge bundle of extra-weighted bedding floating down the hall)

she wraps esther in them and then squeezes her, too

for good measure, sally gets up on her tippie toes and rests her chin on esther’s head

esther, muffled: “i am a burrito now”

sally: “a precious tiny gay burrito”

or, estherrito

bridget puts her in her phone contacts as ‘ettie burrito’

and sally in turn puts her in hers as ‘questherdilla’

also oh my god when will she Stop doing fingerguns with accompanying tongue clicks

sally talks to herself

she has a little wee tape recorder named Diane because Diane

its covered in stickers

she likes to record what she’s doing to organize herself and calm down

and she’ll replay them to process things

sometimes her friends will leave happy messages on there for her

or helen will sing her a little ditty

helen is the world’s best audio stim

her voice is just really soothing

she’ll sing absently and everyone just operates more smoothly for that minute

she likes singing for herself too

humming and tapping her instrument is a soothing habit

helen is very audio/vocal

she likes to play the same song over and over again

bridget has some issues with self image

she also has obsessive tendencies, sometimes related to organization and labeling things

but also related to literature and only being able to talk about whatever she’s into

sometimes it’s easier to quote things from her favorite books instead of replying in her own words

she doesn’t like things that are uneven or unbalanced

objects OR concepts that are unfair or unequal

(except her hair. her hair is badass and she’s okay with that kind of disunity)

esther’s adhd and her big stims are

high heel clicks on the floor when she walks

fancy & feminine clothes that make her feel secure

the ritual of putting on her makeup

pencils (tapping or twirling)

HER RINGS, she has three and she spins spins spins

she likes to rub the shaved side of bridget’s head

and run her fingers through the hair on the other side

she ALWAYS has her father’s old deck of cards with her, she’s shuffled them so many times they’re completely worn down, and no one is allowed to touch them but her

they’re very soft, she has a new pack as well for crisper sound/feeling and everyday use

sometimes she uses card games as lens to make sense of the world

she has a rough time with communication and a rough time with empathy but she’s trying to work on both of those

both come easier with people she’s close to and bridget is helping her some too

it’s easy for her to hyperfocus in class and doing homework, so it took them a while to diagnose her

out of all of them, esther is the best at reminding people to be organized and do self-care (tho she doesn’t always take care of herself)

she spends a lot of her time in her own head, she really values alone time, and she needs to recharge after she spends time around people

even people she loves

jack’s also adhd, had been diagnosed for a while and has almost all of the opposite symptoms as esther (which is another one of the reasons it took them so long to figure out esther)

jack always works better after he moves, if he runs a little or bounces a ball around or is shaking his legs, rocking on his heels

he makes lots of rolling rrr sounds and blows his lips when he’s frustrated

the pencil chewing ended in splinters and the pen chewing ended in ink all over so now he has a little necklace with a chewable shark

the sharks name is Fredrico

his binder is actually kinda helpful because it’s pressure

he screws and unscrews things a lot

actually taking apart and putting back together all machinery is a Big Thing

june is dyslexic

she has cute tinted glasses to help her with studying

sometimes helen reads stuff out loud for her, she doesn’t mind but june hates to ask

for her birthday quentin bought her a five sided highlighter to color code different things

she has some emotional processing issues

it’s easier to feel angry than anything else

& her methods of dealing with anger aren’t super healthy either

quentin is the only one who actually can manage himself

Quentin is a Hydrated Boy

(he has great skin)

quentin always comes across as super chill but that’s actually because he has hella anxiety and works really hard to manage it

penny is autistic and if june and helen are the dad and mom friends and esther is the gay cousin

then sally and anthony are the autistic aunt and uncle who adopt penny as their niece

they can spot one of their own from a mile off and just decided We Gonna Take Her Under Our Big Fluffy Damn Wings

penny is the Flappiest Autistic

big happy arm flaps, upset little hand flaps, her fast excited flaps are literally the best and most joyous thing

she’s always been kinda embarrassed and insecure about it but jack is so supportive

he’s only a moderate flapper but he often flaps with her when she does it

and he calls her his butterfly

this melts her heart and makes her feel happy and not weird and when this happens she is prone to flapping even harder

she calls him her moth

they’re precious fluttery darlings

sometimes when they both get going, sally joins in too and they all spin around the room fluttering in a big flappy tornado

it’s Good