#now that im looking back on it i kinda dont like the one on the left but i cba to go and change it
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I see a lot of people upset about William Kaplan being dead and no one mourning him cus Billy stole his body and I just don't see it that way. The kid in Wanda Vision is Billy Maximoff, The teenager at the Bar Mitzvah is William Kaplan, the Teen that got taken to the hospital after the wreck is neither and both Billy Maximoff and William Kaplan. That Teen went home with the abilities of Billy Maximoff, to the home of William Kaplan, with memories of neither and lived there for three years. He cares about Rebecca and Jeff, he lied to the to protect them from pain, they are his parents. He wants to find Tommy, he has magical powers, he wants to know who he is. All of these things are true. I wouldn't say William Kaplan is dead he just doesn't remember, like Agatha wasn't dead when he was Agnes, she just didn't remember.
#its fully possible the witches road will give Teen both his memories back cus thats the thing he's missing. making him not William Kaplan#and not Billy Maximoff but Billy Kaplan a mix of the two.#agatha all along#agatha harkness#billy kaplan#william kaplan#billy maximoff#and to all the people pissed that he isn't finding Wanda. womp womp this is about his brother and if you looked you would have seen that.#rumor has it Tommy will be in Vision Quest right? Tommy has to be set up somewhere! he doesn't have magic. and why would they bring back#THE SCARLETT WITCH in a marvel tv show? that's a huge moment they want that sucker for a movie.#marvel#jeff kaplan#rebecca kaplan#also for people up set e6 was billy focused.... yeah mcu projects have set ups for other projects.#even Moon Knight set up Wearwolf by knight. then She Hulk and spiderman had a set up for Daredevil. wandavision set up for Agatha All Along#and the Marvels. Mrs Marvel had a set up for The Marvels. thats kinda how the mcu works its a conected story#teen agatha all along#in the show it shows he doesn't actually remember tommy if he didn't he wouldn't have had to find Ralph. he was surprised wanda had twins#named billy and tommy and that one could read mind while the other was a speedster. all he knows about tommy is that he can feel him#and hes missing.#he probably doesn't know what tommy looks like or sounds like or acts all he know is he can feel him MIA and wants him back.#.........#im back. i also see people stiching that one scene with for lack of better term Teen looking in the mirror going I am William Kaplan and#taking it as Billy adjusting to the body hes in now. one even calling him the monster inhabiting Williams body. and i dont think that it.#he doesn't remember being Billy Maximoff OR William Kaplan. again calling him Teen. Teen is looking in the mirror at a body and face that is#completely alien to him because it is! he has amnesia. he's looking in a mirror with no idea who is looking at him not because hes Billy but#because its no one at that moment hes nothing. he has no idea who he is at all. all he know is thats his body his name is William and his#parents and worried and he know that cus he can read minds. thats it nothing else
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arrives 15 min late with a latte
......sup
#yosuke hanamura#persona 4#cool now that its done i can ramble in the tags#fellas im surprised hes here and done#did not think that was gonna happen#fuck i forgot smth#eh ill fix it before i make my print#anywho i might make more i might not who knows not i#yukiko is the next one i have half an idea on but also i have some shining nikki designs rattling around with my sole braincell#i also made a shadow alt for the back but idk if i like the mouth so yall arent gonna see him#also i need to find a gold foil guy that does odd sizes and like moq of 1#bc i wanna do this in gold foil#and its tarot card size bc im dumb as hell#but i want a print for my wall and i know sure as shit no one else will want one hence the moq of 1#my heart wants to make the whole major arcana for p4 but my past completed works says °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ 𝑛𝑜 °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・#so whatever gets done will get done#also im gonna reblog this a lot bc i put in too many hours to get a singular note by me so like if you dont wanna see it block me lmfao#if you have any hot takes for future cards please share with the class bc i only have ideas for yukiko and a full cast she does not make fr#so uh yeah yeehaw#idk what else to ramble about but like cannot believe yosuke fucking hanamura is the first chara to get a completed piece in 5 years#im not fucking kidding#the rest were all quick graphite or abandoned#hes not even my fave in p4- thats naoto protag chan kou and nanako#boys lucky to hit top 5#he just kinda crawled into my affection like some kind of sad pathetic creature idk how it happened either#maybe hes overprocessed now that im looking at it#nope i looked too long this is it this is how he is#ill do better by the women i promise
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Re-watching wakfu for the first time in years and s1 Yugo was so silly???
dude discovered he could make portals at will and his first thought after actually acknowledging it is "i can do so many cool pranks with this"
#he was just a kid..... guys he was just a kid....#HE WAS SO SILLY#also the fact that after eva told him they used to call amalia princess gobball he just laughs at it ☠️#was he 12? i think he was in s1#why dont they ever celebrate characters bdays tho#thinking over it now there was little to no chill time for these guys#sure there was a good amount of non plot stuff to get to know the characters but like#idk? ummm like in the first ova they gave them some chill time and i wish they had done that more#s4 was an amalgamation of “FUCK NOT AGAIN JFC”#OH ACTUALLY#there was (1) episode with chill time and i loved it#despite having gone thru alot of effort to be like look!!! chibi and grougal!!! theyre bros!!! yugo spent like. 5 minutes of screentime#with them. like actually being their brother.#and like it was kinda funny because imagine like the world sorta blowing up a little and then ur child comes back just to say#'dad im rlly fucking upset. ive been to the house of the gods btw. and i met my mom.'#alibert mustve been so fkn confused hdhdbd#then again. its like. average shit for his son#alibert went from gay dad with his lil guy from a species he does not know of who basically works a farm inn to like#a literal demigod. he def has made some enemies#i remember the most abt yugo bec the hyperfix was strongest on him#current thoughts on the others in the brotherhood:#tristepin: yugos nickname did not translate well into en lmao. also my guy pls stop harrassing women?? he gets an arc ik but like. my guy.#yes specifically s1 them#amalia: i mean. she does in fact act like a spoiled 13 yr old. but like. girl they did u kinda dirty.#eva: they also did you kinda dirty. love that your the only one just sick of everyones logic defying shit.#ruel: yk what. no notes. that is the most realistic old man ive ever seen. hes hilarious#az: this mf gets his ass in trouble every five seconds. u can tell he grew up with yugo. also according to s4 he gets bitches so XD#wu's rewatch notes#thats what im calling this#wakfu
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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touched up some daisy, daisy fanart i made at least a year ago but never got to post
#i have so much scattered around but its mostly sketches and i drew them different#way back then#the hev suit was a bit funny before i changed it. i hadnt look at a reference yet lol#ill include a link to the fic in the notes but be aware that its abandoned. but its my favorite fic ever#hlvrai#eyestrain#maybe? idk ppl say bright red is hard to use. looks fine to me but just to be safe#half life vr but the ai is self aware#benrey#gordos freeman#my art#OH FUCK OH SHIT it looks way different on my phone FUCK#i was right to tag eyestrain#but i dont feel like changing the drawing#did noooooot expect this post to get so many notes#i put way more time into the other daisy daisy fanart i posted lol#this one was so old. definitely one of the first times i had drawn them#was not used to drawing facial hair. im still not but now i get that you just kinda fuck around and see what happens#like lots of art goes
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woooowwww wowowowowwwww its that guy. the dude. its my special lil guy!!
uuhh i did this because. i thought the album art for the 1998 anime looked kinda like. the sonic adventure pose. and it was SUPPOSED! to just be a shit post. and then i got 𝒸𝒶𝓇𝓇𝒾𝑒𝒹 𝒶𝓌𝒶𝓎!!
Trimax version TriStamp version
#art#my art#digital art#Digital Illustration#fanart#trigun#trigun 98#trigun 1998#Vash the Stampede#goddddd this took me way too long lmaooo#i been busy sobb#i am not gonna lie i kinda wanna redraw it for both trimax and tristamp#but im not super sure abt it well see#i dont think itd take as long as this did#the worst part abt art imo is color i just cant do it its too hard i struggle too much i hope u cant tell i gave up on it LOL#i was literally like im done w the colors now i just gotta do bg and showed the colored vers to my mom and she was like 😬#WHAT!! WHAT DOES THAT FACE MEAN!! the colors clash really bad... it doesnt look very good.... love the lineart but the colors...... not it#the defeat in my soul#so i redid it and i redid the shading and the style and said then got back to the colors and stole them from one of my favorite paintings#and then ended up puttin a filter on em sobb#i got the colors from rosalyn drexlers chubby checker fyi#cos i mentioned i stole em might as well say from where#i like her art#idk if her arts surreal but its a lil weird its my type#actually i think its pop? idk im not good at tellin that stuff#dont ask me what happened to the bottom of the text it got cropped off on accident n i noticed too late n was too lazy to fix it#i will not change#anyways thats the post sorry for ramblin so much in the tags loll im tired i havent slept in oof a while
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people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T
tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3
#tmnt yap in the taggies !!#would you believe me if i said my cat is named after donnie… teehee !! ^_^#i have been a tmnt lover since i was the ripe age of 6 years old SOBSOB#i used to write bf headcanons on wattpad way long ago… thats where my love for writing started i fear…#i probably have more tmnt merch than i do anime merch which is soso crazy to think about PHEW !!!#notebooks cups plushies legos shirts pajamas stickers tins action figs keychains name something and i have it… is that weird… SOB#im not joking when i say i know the entire lore and could explain everything from start to finish… FOR EACH AND EVERY REBOOT EVER…. wowza…#other than rottmnt because i’ve never been a fan of that reboot sigh…#the only reason donatello hamato isnt on my blorbie list is because i do not want to seem out of touch… he used to be there though !! :3#also i love raph too sigh#i fear donnie was my start to my love for nerdy men… raph was for the mean ones… cough cough akaashi and bakugo#tall lanky men… yeah hes a turtle… i know… let me speak… pls… i beg… T^T#tmnt 2012 will always be my star my light my beloved#i can recite every single episode </3 ALSO THE 2014 & 2017 MOVIES DONT GET ME STARTED i have them on dvd :3#i also have the 1990’s movies on dvd teehee theyre sososososoo good T^T my comfort franchise forever and always#i may always speak of anime but just know tmnt will always be the start of it all and my most beloved <3 its everything to me#also i was and still am an avid tmnt 2012 april oneil hater someone get her out of there i loathe her >:/#was never a supa big fan of leo im very sorry… idk who im sorry to… where are my tmnt fans… am i alone in this world… hello… tmnt fans…#omigosh im back after looking at my old wattpad story IM GIGGLING why was the writing kinda good… it was first person though sigh… goodness#i should create my own tmnt yap tag i fear… i will never shut up about it EVER SOBSOBSOB !! i even had a tmnt party when i was younger </3#donnie ( & mikey ) are so misunderstood UGH i could yap about the lore all day. donnie deserved more recognition he was always doing so muc#FOR ALL of his brothers and they never appreciated it… ill cry right now. donnie you will always be famous to me. april doesnt deserve you.#raph and his temper are so misunderstood too like please. always making him the bad guy HE JUST WANTS TO BE A GOOD BROTHER HES JUST AWKWARD#remembering when i had a crush on a guy names joseph in first grade and he liked tmnt too… joseph just know we were soulmates… i promise </#i used to go up to the tv and kiss the screen when donnie showed up. i was like 6 years old tho its okay… still sleep with my stuffie tho.#thank you to my yaya for buying me that when i had the flu hes still in perfect condition SOB donatello i love you so much UGH im crying#‘thats a mutant turtle ew !!’ HE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND LOVEABLE TO ME. YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND EVERYPONY </3 nia reference woah hi nia :3#whos in favor of tmnt. raise your hands up high so i can see them. im giggling. tmnt lovers rise we sha’ll prosper… WE RIDE AT DAWN 🦅🦅🦅#is this like totally crazy of me… has anyone read this far… if you have jusy know i love you. i cherish you. you are my everything <3#₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ — lene’s latest gossip .ᐟ
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#okay random story time i don't know why im narrating this or how i even stumbled upon this memory rn#but i generally do sad vents in the tags and for a change this is a funny one#so back in highschool (i say highschool but i mean junior college) i used to visit this park near my house a lot#i was an sg kid back then and the thing about parks there is that they're kinda beach-parks and they have the best cycling/running tracks#they're also really massive parks so i used to go often. sometimes bicycling. other times walking. yeah. the park was like my sanctuary#anyway. there are quite a few bike rental areas in the park and there was a cute lil shop next to this one particular rental place#and they sold like biscuits and water and icecreams and stuff and i went there a lot#and on one particular day i went there and there was this guy around my age part timing at that shop#now again this might be culture specific bc i dont see it in india but part timing in uni/pre-uni is pretty common is sg#a lot of shops and restaurants employ teenagers to twenty something ppl for part time jobs... anyway im just adding context#point is that i had walked to the park with my mum that day and she told me to go buy a couple icecreams so i went to the shop#and i saw this guy around my age and like. not to be a simp but this dude was so pretty?#like he saw someone had come to the counter so he looked up and shot a smile and i thought i got slapped by sunlight#i could spend the next several lines going on about his pretty tan skin and his glowing raven eyes but this is pathetic enough so ill stop#anyway he saw me and smiled really wide (customer service smile- i thought to myself) and i smiled back and asked for icecreams or whatever#and then this guy started getting chatty right. so he was all 'you come here (to the park) often right? ive seen you with your bike a lot'#see now. the problem with me is that i always think im bothering people. this poor dude was attempting to make conversation#and i was replying with one word answers#and i wasn't even realizing that he didnt want that. bc he kept asking more questions and i. kept. shutting them down.#then when he gave me the icecream he was all 'are you here alone? icecream alone is no fun... i could keep you company if you want..?'#which. he was being really cute about right. but because im so fucking dense i was all 'oh no i came with my mom actually'#and he went 'aw man' in this really cute but faux sad way which i didnt understand at the time and i left and then#after three full fucking days. i realized this man was tryna hit on me?#and then i went to the park like a week later and he was gone. poof. i even thought of asking the uncle in charge of that place#then i got too embarrassed and chickened out#yeah so turns out my neurodivergence neutralizes any sort of rizz that comes my way#i could've been chilling with a cute boyf rn but no😩 this is my destiny#megumi in the tags
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Ace...?? they cloned my beautiful wife...
#ace if he was born with his mother's hair but without freckles.......#this 3d intro... damn they spent their coins here but didnt age that well xd#i love how there is nearly a movie for every character that joins since usopp.... sanji got the last one. chopper has one i havent seen#and robin now.... i mean its not their movie but you know what i mean#zoro and nami on the same wavelength i miss you.... my fag and hag sisters....#robin old design i miss you.... her and nami look so different.... not like now....#I MISS CHOPPER OLD DESIGN HE LOOKS SO SILLY!!!#the goofy scenes are too good..... 'luffy what are you doing''nothing just a fight' 'okay dont get lost'#also sanji with robin and nami while the others fight... the girls AND sanji#this guy looks like ace with his kinds long middle part hair and eyes.... and luffy likes seeing hum fight#i am seeing things where there are non but my beautiful not dead yet wife keeps haunting me once again#seeing luffy talk about how if he dies fighting to be pirate king then so be it and like HE DID!!!! AND THAT DIDN'T STOP HIM!!#kids with guns TUN TUN kids with guns TUN TUN#robin made a gigantesco mano.... this was visionary#ROBIN giving back the gun to the child so he shoots luffy and he can bounce it back.... luffy enabler num 1.#nami threatening a child with zoros sword.... i needed this so bad.#shryer.... your drip too hard.... your swag too different.... your smoke too hot.... they will kill you#NOOOOOOO the clone of my beautiful dead wife died just like him.... face down...#the old man is dying and zoro knows....#shryer is alive who woulda thot.....#'be serious' 'im always serious... didnt i get out?' this is him. omg#sanji with the cooking hacks for the fight.... i am sure of it... also sanji spy come back to me....#THE BOY IS THE SISTER??? AND THE OLD MAN AND ACE CLONE ARE BLOWN UP???#it is flour lmao they got their ideas from the fight with crocodile#everyone is alive and well 👍🏻including the hat#that was kinda beautiful with that plot twist and everyone wanting to live and all....#nami strangling zoro!!!! more!!!#talking tag#watching one piece#watching one piece movies
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tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"
#bakuspeech#number one is a house bc obviously. if u can own a house wouldnt u#he was very drunk at that time of the evening. I was not bc I have the constitution of a hot air balloon and any stimulant will blow me up#(relatively new development. france fucked me up big time turns out)#we held hand on his bed for like the whole evening. it was honestly very funny in hindsight but we were extremely earnest in the moment#and Im like. working on this thing as well. I dont got meds or therapy lmao Im bootstrappin here#but yeah early last year his bf offered to get me meds and I... turned it down... I think I was worried abt like. idk. something#but one year past looking back Im fully like that was a stupid move you shouldve gotten meds. youve once again fucked urself baku#but yeah with that kinda realization Ive also come to realized I've somewhat? accepted. that I'm just gonna be. like this#this in light of a number of likely chronic stuff too (hence my balloon-like constitution lmao) and#that's kinda bled into the rest of me without me really noticing#but him bringing that up fully unprompted... kinda jolted me out of it#its just. really incredibly sweet. that someone doesn't want me to settle for what I make do with#and like. preps for that work. just kinda held my hand and told me it's possible to do this actually#I didn't really express how I felt very well in that moment I think my brain is very bad and I process emotions with like a day of delay#but. well. Im thinking abt it Right Now. so yknow thats the kind of impact that had on me lol#not super sure why I wrote all this down here really. I think I just want a good n nice reminder that object permanence is real#and I exist in my friends' life even when Im going insane in a hole by myself#and with the power of friendship we can alter the universe's plan for ourselves and also kill god#that's that. anyways I eat lunch now and then pass out probably. last night was... eventful lmao#but!! very good things on the horizon hopefully. well manifestly we hold hammers and we use them#have a good day lads. let's go out and slay monsters under a highway
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I'm gonna get into a brawl with my mother one day don't be surprised when I get on the news
#long rant incoming lol but#so my birthday is in like 2 weekends from now and my mom asked me for a list of things i want#so i compiled a list of six things with like 2 $10 options 2 like $17 options and one $25 and $60 option#and i wanna be clear i dont really care to make one but she gets pissy if i dont and its meant as more an ideas list#i dont need everything on there and its meant for my entire family#or ignore the list! i don't care!#FREAKED OUT on me saying i was being selfish/too expensive and im like....i never expected all of this stuff epseically from one person...#i am happy with one of the $10 options or a gift card or something else entirely so like#it kinda feels bad to get asked for a list of stuff i want and then get called selfish for it and then for her to talk behind my back about#me to my sister lol#also asked me if i was available for a bday celebration on a certain day and i was like yeah i got a thing in the afternoon but i can#still make it#get yelled at AGAIN bc she said oh u can leave that early and i was like...uh...no i cant lol im sorry....i paid to go to this thing already#and its like why ask me if u are gonna get mad if im unavailable (which im not even lmao)#idk it's just it's always been an ideas list in my family so i dont get why she's freaking out on me and acting like im asking for so much#espcially cause she just changed out all of her kitchen appliances and redid all of the landscaping in her front and back yard like ���😭😭#truly didnt think a $10-20 gift was like crazy if u did wanna get me a gift lol#not really looking forward to it now ngl#chen.txt#rant post
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does this even looks like a tf2 fanart anymore
#just experimenting!#i was gonna say im gonna delete this later bc i will ofc change the colouring here but just wanted to show bc i think is pretty#ONLY THIS ONE DRAWING bc is more... pretty me thinks but totally not from the way i wanted to go#but yeah little spoiler for something im doing bc i am so drunk and in love with them i cry a little bit but im fine now#i just love love#kino art#piss mauling#this looks very far away from my art style... but it reminded of my older style too... and like those 2016 shipp art if ykwim#this looks so personal im sorry i promise i will draw funny gore tf2 ugly art back again dont unfollow me bc im happy tonight is 1am buak#- i just wanna feel... happy and pretty and being in love space thats. how im feeling right now... dont drink wine guys my last words#watercolors dont go w my style i just realized that... but this looks pretty for me imo i feel kinda happy with this but is not the idea tb#ughhhh that sniperpauling playlist got me in the feels#really. this doesnt even looks like tf2 art anymore literally like. what tf2 game did yall play??#this two are basically my ocs atp#im so annoying with them ugh
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ok let's catch up quickly
#so i went on a few dates w this guy. long hair beautiful face kinda looked like a girl (good) said yes ma'am when i told him to do smth#(also good) film student great at photography including candids. made a sheath of leather for a sword pin i have . et cetera.#he asked to cuddle and i was like iggg and then i felt Nothing and i was like ohhh yh ok ok yep lesbian#like he meets almost all my criteria but. yeahhh no . also at the end of that date he had some weird takes. anyway broke up w him and told#him actually im p sure im a lesbian (again) and he was like yk thats the second time this has happened to me this week but its ok bc ive#fallen for this girl from berlin. and then we cooked together. anyway . met a beautiful butch lowk in love w her. weve been on (1) date.#have two exams in a few days havent studied enough going to like end it all basically. my research partner kicked me off our research#(expected(it was always skinda sketchy)) which was devastating + it happened in a lidl 15 hours into a journey from bordeaux#to go back to the UK. my friends were kinda busy paying for baguettes but also they heard this whole exchange and are kinda mad at him#my friend of 10+ years is coming over in a few days. my evil ex situationship person that i decided to stay friends w because i kept#insisting they are a good friend and not evil and also extremely beautiful? turns out shockingly enough they were evil. tried to fix them#and then i realised due to their entire friendship group being ppl like me (Every Single One of their friends are ppl they met on dating#apps then led on then dumped and proposed staying friends w) and are collectively extremely attracted to them and not over them they#keep validating the most diabolical shit they say/do to hace a chance w them. they broke up w their ex and the way they keep leading#this poor girl on and making her heartbeeak worse and saying that they want more power over her and want her to beg for them back etc...MY#JAW HAD DROPPED esp bc i didnt even know the ex was in the picture BECAUSE ME AND ONE OF OUR FRIENDS (that they also dated) HAD JUSR SLEPT#NAKED TOGETHER IN THEIR BED W THEM. GIRL. anyway that is the least of the diabolical stuff they said but no we are moving onnn#this was b4 the beautiful butch btw. anyways . i have a mitski concert tmrw i think?? idek anymore#i used to have a crush on this guy very briefly and then it disappeared and then i realised if he fundementally changed everything abt#himself then maybe id like him but ofc i didnt tell him that but i still think abt it sometimes but anyway thats irrelevant now bc 99% sure#even if he did id still not find him attractive (lesbianism). please recommend good overnight moisturisers btw i have super dry skin#right. the friend of 10 yrs. we had a hard convo abt why she essentially bullied me in year 8 and it made me highly bitter but i also love#her and ik things are diff now its been like . Many Years . and shes going to stay a while I HAVE TWO EXAMS I DONT HAVE TIME but i love her#its fine. i think i might just switch into medicine and do the whole become a neurosurgeon thing (which was my plan B) bc plan A is looking#kinda impossible rn. I WANNA TALK MORE ABT WHAT THE EX SITUATIONSHIP PERSON SAID but i wont bc i dont wanna be too mean but also . MY GOD#i had a conversation w a philosopher friend about whether i have a moral responsibility to try to fix them bc unleashing this on society#feels wrong and he said 'probably but...run' so yeah im not talking to them atm. second date w beautiful butch on monday btw IDK WHAT TO#WEAR. she said she likes fems. im just gonna wear the shortest ralph lauren skirt i have w the cute leg warmers and hope 4 the best#its 1:15 AM im abt to drink coffee and start studying bc what the FUCK man. also almost finished watching the boys its very good#one of my best friends is struggling rn it is breaking my heart i want to take the burden from her i miss her very much
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its past midnight and here i am planning a sweater i have neither the materials nor funds to make
#once 10:30 hits i enter a fugue state and i just start making shit#i was like making little drawings and grid patterns and looking at knitting patterns for few hours and then 10 hit-#-and i was like ohh. okay so i have to make a mockup right now#so i put on one of these really long series recap videos and just went to town with the yarn and needles i had#im not going to use these colours (maybe the same cream shade but i dont have enough rn anyways) bc i want a darker green#but idk if i will use a different weight of yarn im not sure about that yet#i think it looks really good in just standard weight (worsted or w/e) but ik it would take a v long time and strain my wrists/arms a lot :(#so idk what i will do about that. maybe ill look at the same style of sweater but w/ thicker yarn to see examples#basically i want to make one of those christmas sweaters that have the patterns at the top + bottom trim but tma style#its supposed to look like open and closed eyes if that wasnt clear#and i might do lettering in the middle if it will fit? i wanted to do the whole ''ceaseless watcher'' phrase but it would def not fit sooo#just the name is fine. i will maybe put one on each side (front + back) or if theres room for like 3+ than i could do a repeating pattern#its going to take a lot of math + planning tho so O_o wish me luck#i dont even have yarn yet lol idk what im talking about#i gotta get to bed....#tma#the magnus archives#ceaseless watcher#my art#kinda#knitting is art
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Man its hard to have a second favorite when they're all insanely good augh
#okay buy actual might be my second favorite tho#got me having that feeling back from dear machine kinda#well not exactly its kinda mixed but ough#sm with this one ugh#small thing tho. there was probably a grew on me reference in the end#or like a nod back to it. which makes grew on me have more of a hit & confirms the idea i thought it was about#with it being towards an audience#idk idk am spitballin really#also hey eccentric mention. that's a word i use. im canon Jash lore/j#bro no im sad now. but like in a good way. cos that means the song hits & is rlly good#also if it helps i do not have bro as an idol. i don't have em for reasons like that that. ALSO IM JUST WEIRD LOL#nah cos once i had to write an essay on the prompt “write about a person you idolize or look up to”#LIKE MY GUY I DONT HAVE ANYONE TF DO I WRITE ABOUT????#my only idol is hatsune miku thank you very much#okay okay im done now#i just ougj#song hits#chonny jash#moss post
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well that was a shortlived good feeling about my job
#maybe i should just become unemployed. maybe i should just suffer!#recap of todays further events .#that supervisor? who i kinda didnt already like but now absolutely hate?#she came down to confirm that i wasnt leaving. okay . and then she fucking tells me#oh we're going to get another person to help out from this other company. we were going to do that bc we thought you were leaving#but she thinks that even if im staying there should be another person on this floor. bc apparently more has to be done#and there are 'constant complaints' abt this floor . which doesnt make sense to me bc there shouldnt be#and so we're waiting to see what the manager decides but hes on fucking vacation and wont get back until. next week??#she said she was gonna email him and like right after she left i emailed and texted him explaining everything#and trying to very nicely say hey what the fuck are you doing you don't need to hire anyone else#and if im doing a bad job fucking tell me so i can do it better. bitch#and she had the nerve to fucking tell me when she was talking to me#that i wont find an easier job than this one#well if its so fucking easy why are we hiring someone else#by the way getting that extra person from this other company doesnt cost them anything which is why theyre doing it i think#which is making me not feel good abt my own future lmao. like why would they keep paying me when they can get someone for free#and she was saying all this stuff like oh you have it so good here we dont write you up i do all this stuff to help you like . ok#i didnt ask you to come downstairs w the coffee order and if you wanted me to i would come up . god#but the thing of me not being able to find a better job like wow! what if i killed you. for saying that to my face#and she talks abt how shes been w the company 20 years ok and that doesnt give you an excuse to treat me like a child. jesus#anyway im very pissed off and not enjoying my work situation lol. i dont wanna do this anymore#but looking at other jobs im so unemployable. sigh
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