#now it has been sitting in my drafts
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dannyuta · 2 months ago
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buddie + a series of texts from my sister who doesn't watch the show
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neptunezo · 5 months ago
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The idea of the batkids scaring Bruce with “a new grandchild” to only show an animal is so funny to me, because imagine Bruce is so used to it that when Jason wants to introduce him to his new grandchild Bruce almost falls out of his chair when there’s an ACTUAL KID!
Dick: You’re a granddaddy now Brucie!!!
Bruce: WHAT?!? Who?? When??? How??? Actually don’t tell me how. Who is she??? When did she give birth???
Dick: What? No, meet my kid *holds up a cat* her name is biscuit and shes the love of my life!
Steph: Cass and I are adopting…
Bruce: Holy shit, actually???
Cass: Yes, it was a tough choice, but we want to adopt
Bruce: Do you need any help with paperwork and stuff? It’s kinda my thing. Also consider the fact that you might be too young.
Steph: Too young…?
Bruce: Yes, I mean you’re only in your 20’s, are you sure you can handle a kid?
Cass: Too young for an iguana?
Damian: It happened again, I have a kid.
Bruce: What do you mean AGAIN?!?
Damian: This is my second kid, duh
Bruce: Are you talking about goats?
Damian: Of course I am father
Tim: BRUCE YOU’RE GOING TO BE A GRANDFATHER!!!
Bruce: Tim I didn’t think I was going to have to tell you this again after the whole thing with Stephanie, but just kissing someone doesn’t get them pregnant
Tim:
Bruce: Is it a dog?
Tim: No it’s a tiger
Jason: I have something to tell you
Bruce(not looking up from his paperwork): Okay, what’s up?
Jason: I have a kid, I want you to meet your granddaughter
Bruce: I can’t possibly imagine what type of animal you’ve gotten, but I’d love to meet her
Jason: What the hell are you talking about?
Bruce (looking up to see an actual child): You actually have a kid????
Jason: Yeah, Roy and I thought it was time I adopted Lian
Lian: Hi Grandpa!!!
Bruce: I’m going to faint, grab me some ice will you?
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sparklingsora · 9 months ago
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doodle dump. give it up for WORLD'S WORST POLYCULE!!! (feat. my vox redesign)
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you know how hermit crabs like form queues where they exchange shells from biggest to smallest. yeah these bitches do that but with shirts
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radarchives · 6 months ago
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mc releasing their inner alpha
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heybaetae · 2 months ago
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rip to whoever he smiled at
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elphabasthropp · 3 months ago
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i want very much to do those things. and what is it that restrains you? i do not know.
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therainbowtea · 1 year ago
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POV: Your husband has Instagram
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aaronstveit · 5 months ago
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You jump, I jump, right?
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hee-blee-art · 1 month ago
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what if a duck and an alien were lesbians together
[ID: a drawing of della duck and penumbra from ducktales. penumbra looks surprised as della wraps around her waist for a hug. end ID]
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hoshiina · 7 months ago
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— a guy asks for your number ft. hoshina, narumi, reno
warnings: mentions dick and profanities in hoshina's
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navstuffs · 6 months ago
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Dry-humping Leon Kennedy, who is wearing Graves's outfit. 
Based on this mod. TW: dry humping/knee humping, masturbation, gloves, clothed male, tiny little tease at the end, gn!reader. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!! lowkey dedicated to @sarahs-secrets2 biggest grave's fan i know
my leon's masterlist
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If Leon Kennedy could stop time right now, he would. He had to be out of your house within ten minutes if he didn't want to be late; he was never late, but all his responsibilities were thrown out the window when it came to you. Your presence influenced his mind and sense of duty.
"There is nothing bad on putting yourself first, Leon."
And there you are, legs spread apart, humping your clothed sex against his knee, a frantic desire for someone who won't see each other for weeks. Your eyes are locked on his, drowsy with pleasure, begging for more than Leon can give now. 
"Don't do this to me," Leon whispers, his cock twitching in his pants. He wants you to give you everything, but he limits himself to helping, gloved hands on your hips, creating more friction.
Leon glances from your focused face, to your chest, your hips, to then your covered sex. His eyes lust as he notices the wet spot in your underwear. Leon licks his lips unconsciously, his hands impatiently pulling your underwear down.
His gloved hands start rubbing your aching sex, not slow as usual times, but more frantic, his gaze directed to your face again, anxious to know if he is pleasing you or not. You yelp, surprised by the difference on the texture, not his warm hands, but the raspy texture of his gloves.
And though he isn't used to dirty talk (Leon always mentions how awkward and silly he feels), he still does it for you. 
"Can I can make you cum like this? Right in my knee? Please, so I can remember you."  
You answer with a sob, fingers digging into his shoulders. You start whimpering; so close now, so close to let it rip and cum in your underwear. 
It is Leon moaning your name, his hands stroking your sex, that makes the rope rip. You finally let go, locking your lips with his. After a couple of minutes of your heavy breathing, you look at the clock. Five minutes until Leon has to leave. He notices your intentions, stopping your wrist before it touches his bulge.
"Ah, ah. Not now ,later."
"We have time." You argue. Always so stubborn. Or spoiled by him, didn't make a difference.
"Let's just stay like this for a while, okay?" Leon asks, holding you tightly in his arms, your hands gripping his vest. You both don't say anything until you whisper.
"Do not dare to not come back to me-"
"I know."
"-I am serious, Leon!" 
"I know. I will come back to you, I promise."
A promise—a promise you both don't know when Leon might not be able to keep. But Leon promises it anyway because what lengths wouldn't he go for you? 
Less than a minute now. You sigh, ready to leave his lap. You notice he makes no motion to remove his gloves, and you can't help but cringe and feel powerful at the same time. You have a full view of what started all of this: the jeans, the blue shirt rolled up into his sleeves, and those darn gloves. Leon notices you staring and blushes, looking at you in that innocent way it drives you crazy.
"Don't start." You warn him. He raises his arms up, as if not doing anything. Bastard.
It is time for him to leave. You leave his lap, dressing Leon's old shirt from an unknown band from the '90s you were wearing before his arrival. You two kiss again, this time more tender, more gentle, sealing the promise.
Come back to me.
I will.
You let your man go, and Leon doesn't look back when the door closes. You bite your lips, and the sense of dread and despair when he is gone starts growing in your chest. You can't let sadness invade you like this, not like last time. A new idea pops into your head. But for that, you must call the other man in your and Leon's life. 
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oikawa-tooru · 7 months ago
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roh’s favourites: gojō satoru & getō suguru in jujutsu kaisen
my one and only
+ where do we go now? by gracie abrams
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merlinemryspendragon · 5 months ago
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Hope is like the sun. If you only believe in it when you can see it, you’ll never make it through the night. Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017)
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linovadraws · 8 months ago
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Greg is a registered service animal!
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silverseaming · 1 month ago
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𝔴𝔢 𝔩𝔞𝔶 𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢, 𝔣𝔬𝔯 𝔶𝔢𝔞𝔯𝔰 𝔬𝔯 𝔣𝔬𝔯 𝔥𝔬𝔲𝔯𝔰 / 𝔰𝔬 𝔩𝔬𝔫𝔤 𝔴𝔢'𝔡 𝔟𝔢𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔣𝔩𝔬𝔴𝔢𝔯𝔰 🥀
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diningwiththeasquiths · 4 months ago
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Dining’s Cobra Kai + text posts {part 14/?}
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