#now im still not sure if im being bullied but im pretty sure somethings off and literally everyone is saying yeah

[hyperspacial]

King of being bullied more as an adult than as a closeted autistic child 💪

[luvyeni]

⠀ ( drabble ) mines, all mines ̨ ! ୨୧ 一 黄仁俊 ՞

⸃ ⸰ ⌁ renjun is super affectionate with you , but he’s also jealous of haechan calling you pretty  ヾ

boyfriend!renjun・ reader ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ g ・ smut ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ cw ・ unprotected sex, jealous ‎ renjun, dirty talk wc ・ ‎0.5k ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎| ‎ ‎click to library

request. dream being confused when jealous!renjun is affectionate and teases him for touchin u up when he doesnt do it with them so he fucks u for letting his friends flirt with u and stuff 😩‼️

「 ୨୧ authors note 」 i hope you like it <3 !!!

“baby.” renjun pulled you into his lap for like the fifth time that day. “baby i miss you.” you chuckled, running your fingers through his hair. “jun i’ve been here with you all day.” you smiled kissing the top of your man’s head.

“ew oh my god.” haechan said, fake gagging on your couch. “get a room, no one wants to see you two be all lovey dovey.” you rolled your eyes, renjun mumbled a bunch of insults under his breath. “you’re in my girlfriends apartment, i will touch her as much as i want, you get out.” he snapped, wrapping his arms around your waist. “jun stop.” you calmed him down.

“you know yn you have to be one of the luckiest girls in the world.” jaemin said. “really? why is that?” you questioned. “because you’re the only person in this room who’s ever had the joy of renjun affection.” you chuckled, your boyfriend on the other hand wasn’t amused. “shut up jaemin.”

“hey all im saying is you’ve never held us like that.” the boy held his hands up in defense. “because you aren’t fucking him thats why.” jeno said. “a pretty girl like yn, yeah i’d make sure to give her all my attention.” now you knew haechan didn’t mean any harm, but this seemed to piss renjun off. “hyuck, shut the fuck up.” you rubbed his shoulders to calm him down. “be calm im just saying you’re lucky to have a pretty girlfriend.” renjun knew you would never give him the time a day — but the way you smiled at the comment just made him mad.

“alright it’s time to go guys.” you could tell they were riling the boy up. “what? it’s still 15 minutes of the game left.” mark said, they all whined, complaining. “yeah, but if you guys keep going none of us will make it to the end.” they all groaned, getting up. “i know, i know.” you said guiding them to the door. “next week bring duct tape for hyucks mouth.” chenle spoke up. “next time we won’t fucking bring him.” you laughed. “is it a crime to call a pretty girl pretty?” you shook your head. “when her boyfriend is sitting right there?” jisung said. “yes.”

you closed the door on them; ready to turn to clean up their mess — instead you were met with your boyfriend. “jun?” he was standing there, and you could tell he wasn’t happy. “don’t be upset.” you tried to reason with him, but you could tell in his eyes he was already there, which made your stomach bubble with excitement. “bedroom. now.” you already knew what that meant.

“you think it’s funny?” he had your cheek pressed against your pillow. “wh-what junie?” he slapped your ass making you yelp. “don’t play fucking stupid.” he snapped. “smiling at haechan basically flirting with you, smiling like you’re so desperate to be fucked by him or something.”

“n-not true.” you stuttered out. “is it? cause you’re soaked, thinking about him fucking you?” the feeling of your boyfriend's cock teasing your hole. “no!” you said. “jun please fuck me.” you desperately pleaded with him to fill you with his cock. “please.”

you gasped feeling him enter you— making you take him fully. “shit.” he hissed, gripping your hips. “yeah , fuck he can’t fuck you like this.” he groaned , his cock dragging along your walls , bullying your gspot. “he can’t fuck you like the whore you are.” you moaned. “o-only for you.”

“fuck. that’s right, this pussy is only mine to fuck.” he groaned. “no one will ever be able to fuck you like i can.” you moaned out, his hand coming up to your hair, yanking it back. “understand me?” he gritted in your ear. “fuck jun yes!” you squealed , clenching around him. “fuck im not gonna last.”

his balls slapped against your clit , his head thrown back as he fucked into you. “fuck im gonna cum.” he moaned. “cum with me.” he demanded. “cum.” your head fell against the bed, body convulsing as you came. “shit.” he slammed into you, a song of curse words flowing from his mouth, his stomach tightening as he came. “oooh shit.” he dragged out as he painted your insides white, his body slumped over yours as you both searched for air , coming down from your blissful highs, kissing your neck down to your shoulders. “mines, mines, mines.” he repeated into your ear softly.

“you’re all mines.”

©️LUVYENI

[diorsluv]

feather , part 33

�� no, duh ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

lhughes_06

liked by _quinnhughes, mackie.samo, jamie.drysdale, and 199,272 others

lhughes_06 call me gordon ramsay the way i’m always cookin 😮‍💨🧑‍🍳

view all comments

jamie.drysdale bro maxxed out frat boy speak

→ lhughes_06 ☝️🫵🤫🧏‍♂️

username43 I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD THAT’S HER

jackhughes is that what the burning smell was

→ lhughes_06 HEY I DID NOT BURN ANYTHING

→ jackhughes tell that to the smoke detector

→ lhughes_06 SHUT UP

yourusername when he can cook 🙈

→ rutgermcgroarty WHAAAAAAAAT

→ markestapa SAY IT AGAIN FOR THE CAMERA 📸

→ lhughes_06 oh 😳

→ dylanduke25 😱😱

→ _quinnhughes oh. OH. OH? O H ?

→ edwards.73 WAIT A SECOND……..

→ jackhughes what the fuck!

→ colecaufield WHAT DID I MISS???

→ trevorzegras did you have some secret intervention that i was not a part of?!?

→ _alexturcotte say it again no fucking balls

→ jamie.drysdale i checked life360 i know where you are 😒

→ adamfantilli so WHAT THE HELL IS THIS

→ luca.fantilli I LEFT MY PHONE ALONE FOR ONE MINUTE AND I COME BACK TO FIND THIS

→ mackie.samo go ahead n repeat that one for me

→ yourusername now that i have all your attention did you see that drake video 😨

edwards.73 this is the hardest soft launch i’ve ever seen

→ rutgermcgroarty i bet something’s harder tho 👀

→ lhughes_06 ✅ rutgermcgroarty

→ markestapa WHAT

→ yourusername WOAHHHH 🙉🙉

→ _quinnhughes BRO WHAT THE FUCK

→ jackhughes the dick jokes are getting worse

→ trevorzegras but i taught him well jackhughes

username10 bro exposed half her face thinking we weren’t gonna know 🙄

→ username87 i meannnnnn we all know anyways 🫢🫢

trevorzegras whens the hard launch

→ lhughes_06 well don’t spoil the surprise

→ trevorzegras 😥

→ colecaufield whos gonna tell him

→ _quinnhughes not me

→ jackhughes def not me

→ yourusername i volunteer as tribute 🙋‍♀️

markestapa luke is a dumbass confirmed

→ lhughes_06 mark is a bully confirmed

→ markestapa 🤬

→ lhughes_06 😓

luca.fantilli remember when you used to post about the friend group? cuz i dont 😒

→ lhughes_06 i just wanna show of my gf 🙁

→ lhughes_06 is that so wrong 😔😔

→ luca.fantilli yes

→ lhughes_06 oh…

→ yourusername and i’m sure your gf wants to show you off too lhughes_06

→ lhughes_06 well if she did then i’d be very flattered

→ yourusername ah then you should be pretty flattered cuz i’m almost 100% positive she wants to

→ luca.fantilli CAN YOU TWO PLEASE FUCKING STOP 😭

username51 man im ngl ur girlfriends hot

→ lhughes_06 oh hell no BACK UP

→ username40 LMAOOO

elblue6 oh that’s great sweetie! when did you learn to cook?

→ jackhughes mom he still doesn’t know how to

→ lhughes_06 YES I DO

→ elblue6 did your best friend and newly turned girlfriend teach you?

this reply has been deleted

→ lhughes_06 MOM YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO SAY THAT

→ _quinnhughes 💀

→ elblue6 oops

username88 ellen’s actually a fucking savage

→ username92 mama hughes 🫶

username13 i’m waiting for fuckin tmz to make some article about this shit

→ username7 GOODBYE NOT TMZ

username65 luke sweetie even my non hockey friends know about this shit.. you gotta step it up

liked by lhughes_06

_quinnhughes bro thinks hes cooking just cuz he got a girl

→ lhughes_06 I COOKED SO HARD FYM

→ yourusername lukey ily but you did not cook whatsoever 😭😭

→ colecaufield we cooked for him

→ adamfantilli and burned 2 kitchens down in the process

→ lhughes_06 so what i’m hearing is you did more damage than i did

→ _alexturcotte 🤫🤫

dylanduke25 she literally doesn’t even like steak

→ lhughes_06 and how would you know that

→ dylanduke25 because she texted the group chat that like two years ago

→ lhughes_06 ACCORDING TO RESEARCH taste buds change about every 7 years soooo

→ edwards.73 dude she turned you into a nerd

→ yourusername on behalf of his gf THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A NERD

→ markestapa 👀👀 yourusername

username22 he aint foolin anyone

username78 oh my god he can cook 😱😱😱

rutgermcgroarty but isn’t being able to cook like the bare minimum

→ lhughes_06 no……..(?)

→ yourusername YES IT IS 👏👏

→ lhughes_06 I MEAN YES IT IS

→ markestapa no it’s not 🙄🙄

→ yourusername i mean they jus gotta know the basics is what i’m saying yk

→ mackie.samo your man knows more than just the basics from what i’ve heard

→ yourusername yes he does 🤭🤭

→ dylanduke25 shit is that why i can’t get a date

adamfantilli i really thought you weren’t gonna post her 😔

→ lhughes_06 don’t be jealous man don’t worry

→ adamfantilli i’m not jealous 😕😕

→ mackie.samo idk you kinda do seem jealous

→ adamfantilli I’M NOT

→ luca.fantilli it’s okay bro let it out

→ yourusername awww adam do you want his attention 😣😣😣😣

→ adamfantilli stfu i KNOW you can’t be talking yourusername

→ yourusername oh ! 😃

→ markestapa LMFAOOO

username9 you live to torture us

username27 there’s no point in begging they’re never gonna do a hard launch

→ username66 it’s not like they need to

jamie.drysdale you’ve successfully shivered my timbers

→ lhughes_06 what 😥

→ jamie.drysdale my timbers are shivered as fuck

→ colecaufield LMAO

→ lhughes_06 I DON’T GET IT

→ jamie.drysdale i don’t need to see you two kissing on insta i already see it every day on ft

→ trevorzegras i mean at least you’re getting a show 🫣🫣

→ jamie.drysdale GOD NO

→ jamie.drysdale i’m going to vomit

→ jamie.drysdale never make that implication ever again

luca.fantilli what a jumpscare

→ lhughes_06 bro stop fucking hating 😒

→ luca.fantilli i can’t help myself

→ yourusername get off the fanboy agenda lu 🙄🙄

→ luca.fantilli fuck both of you

→ adamfantilli i think they’re already doing that luca.fantilli

→ yourusername MY GOD NO

username33 i don’t think they know what soft launch means anymore

_quinnhughes you didn’t even have the decency to put a trigger warning 😔

→ lhughes_06 wtf would it even say 😭

→ jackhughes tw happy couple

yourusername

liked by _quinnhughes, trevorzegras, edwards.73, and 248,050 others

yourusername shit’s feelin a little too soft now.. might have to switch it up 🫣

view all comments

markestapa are u saying what i think ur saying

markestapa ARE YOU FUCKING SAYING WHAT I THINK YOU’RE SAYING????

→ yourusername idk marky what do you think i’m saying 🫢

→ markestapa shut the fuck up dont tease me like this

→ yourusername you’re such a fan stop acting like you don’t know we’re already together 🙄🙄

→ markestapa thanks for crushing my dreams and aspirations🖕

jamie.drysdale i know you forced him to wear that shirt

→ yourusername WHAT NO I DIDN’T

→ trevorzegras lying is a sin ‼️

→ yourusername is it so hard for you to believe that maybe he just genuinely loves me 😔

→ jackhughes yes

→ _alexturcotte honestly it’s harder to believe that you genuinely love him

→ yourusername ARE YOU CALLING ME UNFAITHFUL??

→ colecaufield lmfaooo no we’re just saying he’s hard to love

→ _quinnhughes damn

→ lhughes_06 damn.

username65 HINTING AT A HARD LAUNCH??

→ yourusername am i?? 🙊

edwards.73 i don’t think you wanna hard launch him

→ yourusername why 😓

→ edwards.73 everyone’s gonna get jumpscared

→ lhughes_06 uncool bro. UNCOOL.

→ mackie.samo lukey boy you sound pretty offended as her “best friend”

→ lhughes_06 i’m just being a cool best friend and getting offended for her boyfriend WHO I’M SURE IS GREAT AND AMAZING AND SUPER HANDSOME

→ rutgermcgroarty okay buddy you do you

username21 OH MY GOD HARD LAUNCH RIGHT NOW

username73 FUCKING FINALLYYYY

lhughes_06 you’re actually so cute

→ yourusername my bf doesn’t approve of you go away ❌❌

→ lhughes_06 aw shucks

→ jackhughes AW SHUCKS??? 💀

→ rutgermcgroarty stop the glazing

→ luca.fantilli biggest dickrider i’ve ever seen

→ dylanduke25 literally hop off her dick bro

→ mackie.samo you guys smell that?? cuz i smell a d1 dickrider

→ trevorzegras bro folded so hard

→ _alexturcotte stay strong my brother

→ lhughes_06 shut the fuck upppp

username54 you’re killing me 😓

colecaufield are you stepping on his docs

→ yourusername they’re dupes 🙏🙏

→ lhughes_06 THEY ARE NOT DUPES

→ lhughes_06 i mean from what i’ve heard at least

→ _quinnhughes you’re fumbling this secret really hard

→ edwards.73 there’s nothing to fumble at this point 😭 _quinnhughes

→ markestapa bro has enough money to buy 100 pairs of doc martens and still gets the dupes

→ yourusername financial management!

adamfantilli it’s SUMMER. why did he buy you skates 😭😭

→ yourusername indoor rinks 🙄🙄

→ luca.fantilli use your brain little bro

→ rutgermcgroarty 🧠 adamfantilli

→ adamfantilli that’s.. not what people use that emoji for

→ rutgermcgroarty i know exactly what they use it for 😉😉

→ yourusername HUH????

→ lhughes_06 whats wrong with buying her skates during the summer 😐

_alexturcotte 🧱🚀

→ yourusername LMAOOO I READ THAT SO WRONG

→ _quinnhughes how the hell do you read it wrong it’s literally emojis?

→ dylanduke25 bricked up rocket?????? wtf is that

→ _quinnhughes never mind

→ mackie.samo it means hard launch dumbass 😒😒 dylanduke25

trevorzegras do you just tie a bow around everything and call it coquette now

→ yourusername that’s exactly what i do

→ trevorzegras oh 😰😰

→ mackie.samo SO COQUETTE 👺

→ colecaufield so coke ett!

→ jackhughes i thought it was pronounced coke-eh???

→ yourusername cocaine

→ jamie.drysdale oh.

→ markestapa novocaine yourusername

→ edwards.73 why are we naming drugs

→ rutgermcgroarty NOVACANE markestapa

→ dylanduke25 FRANK OCEAN 🥰

→ _alexturcotte what the hell is going on

username56 THE FLOWERS ARE SO CUTE

username29 does he spoil you

→ yourusername he does 🤭

_quinnhughes i see he’s treating my lil drizzy good

→ yourusername wtf u never call me that

→ _quinnhughes what’s wrong with calling you lil drizzy 😥😥

→ trevorzegras it’s MY nickname for her

→ yourusername ehhhh trevorzegras

→ trevorzegras shush now

→ trevorzegras AND PLAGIARISM IS ILLEGAL

→ _quinnhughes shut your face zegras

→ trevorzegras face is shut 🫡🫡

mackie.samo i flinched out of utter terror

→ yourusername next time i see you you’re gonna flinch cuz of my fist

→ mackie.samo okay then square up 😤

→ yourusername i got your sisters on speed dial

→ mackie.samo i got your brother and bf on speed dial 🙄🙄

→ yourusername but they can’t hit me or else my mommy will get mad

→ mackie.samo fucking cry baby

→ yourusername suck it 🤬

dylanduke25 is that book cinderella

→ yourusername only you would look closely enough to notice what book i’m reading 😭

→ dylanduke25 what can i say i love the details

→ yourusername mhm i bet the girls love you

→ dylanduke25 no actually they don’t 💔

→ yourusername aw duker it’s okay ily

→ dylanduke25 i bet your bf’s punching the air rn

→ yourusername he’s currently whining about you and laying on top of me 😃😃

username58 luke’s a clingy bf?!?! 🙉

jackhughes mom misses you

→ yourusername AW TELL HER I MISS HER MORE

→ _quinnhughes the ass kissing is crazy

→ yourusername shut up before i tag your mom

→ lhughes_06 mom’s trying to steal my girl 🤬

this reply has been deleted

→ jackhughes luke we all saw that you’re such a pussy

next chapter notes ) ITS SHORT I KNOW but after you know.. stuff……. happened i really wanted to get something out AND IT’S VALENTINES DAY SO HOW COULD I NOT i hope you guys had a great day, valentine or not!!

tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s @jackquinnswife @freds-slut @love4ldr @blueeyedbesson @43hughes @v1olentdelights @dancerbailey3 @random-human02 @ho3forfakeguys@loveforaugust@cstads-blog@h0e4fictionalme-n

[sugar-omi]

OMFG DUDE I was thinking abt coves dick again (as one does 🤭) and just realized w the dick size math that cove prolly bought normal condoms before yall went ‘all the way’ bc he didn’t kno he was huge (like u said in that one ramble like “move ur arm” “that’s not my arm”)

so when yall actually get into it and he tries to put it on u just have an awkward moment where he’s like

“it’s too small🧍‍♂️”

and now he’s apologizing for ‘ruining’ ur ‘real’ first time together and ur torn between comforting him that he didn’t ruin shit and laughing bc usually when guys say that it’s a fucking lie but he’s actually so deadass and u can see it the way the rubber doesn’t even accommodate his tip 😭💀

then u gotta tell him it’s okay to hold off until yall get bigger condoms or ur okay going raw if he is 🤭🤭🤭

-🗑️

ARGHH YOU ARE NOT HELPING MY ACCIDENTAL CREAMPIE BRAINROT. "the way the rubber doesnt even accommodate his tip" ohhh god biting my lips off my face rn. i can't fucking....

he would be too scared to go raw, especially first time. he knows that's a demon he's not ready to face (if you ask, he'll say he worried about any accidental children. but deep, deep in his mind. he knows something will, and does, click when you do it raw and he cums in you the first time...)

mmm, there's a few different ways to go with this...

because I can see cove waiting, im sure he does. he does wait, he wants things to be perfect (as perfect as 2 virgins fucking for the first time can be) and for you guys to avoid any unwanted scares or accidents.

but I also love the thought of him being impatient..

he buys the "right" condoms the second time around, and it doesn't look exactly right... but it's definitely not as small as last time...

decides to go with it after a bit of inner turmoil... "..maybe it's meant to fit that way? I thought it was supposed to go all the way to the base, though. its a bit tight, too... fuck, it'd be way too embarrassing to get the size wrong again. not that y/n would bully me about it or something, but... argh, I really want this to be perfect too. and I wanna go all the way with her..."

or even if he buys the right size, perhaps doesn't realize, or chooses the thin condoms since that's what was left. doesn't realize how different the thin ones are, especially of they're the ultra thin.

eitherway, all~~ circles back to right now. he's sinked into you, and he is gentle, he wants your first time to be romantic after all. but as he gets closer n closer to the edge, he gets a bit excited, his hips thrusting deeply into you.. all he can think about is how much he loves you, your pretty sounds, your body pressed against his, and the tight heat of your cunt.

doesn't realize when it breaks, not really anyway. gasps and moans because fuck you feel so hot inside, so wet and perfect... too far gone to think about the sudden change in sensation. and when he finishes, he definitely doesn't think about it. too lost in the feeling of his cum filling up the "condom" and your walls tightening around him as you finish too.

also love the thought that regardless of if he buys the right size or the thin, or if he remembers to pinch the tip of the rubber, all that sweet stuff.. he still ends up cumming inside you. not noticing if he teared the rubber in his hurry to be inside you already (blame teenage hormones, it's not his fault yeah 🙏)

of course not blowing his full load inside you, but i like to think that he cums so much, its really a miracle he doesn't break the rubbers from that amount alone... either way it's gonna leak out, n even just that little bit..

but regardless of how it happens, once he gets past the initial stress of it all n you get past the scare. his mind is totally filled with thoughts of actually coming inside you..

n even his dreams are filled with the image of your cunt all twitchy and wet with fluids n a bit puffy from all the fucking, n having earlier ate you out in the dream, n his fat load of cum leaking out of your cunt...

can't look you in the eye. he's totally ruined... probably can't look his parents in the eye either since he promised to be responsible, but now he's dreaming and fantasizing of doing otherwise..

[prodbyton]

Pervy wonbin at a party and he fucks you

actually writing a wonbin fic with almost the same concept as this…

but imagine wonbin who’s secretly been eyeing you for a few months. you two had a class together in university, and you had sat next to him first day of the semester when there were no more seats taken. he was quiet around you, and you just assumed he was shy.

he wasn’t usually this quiet, but you made him nervous. the way your perfume was so strong and it was all he could smell for the hour and a half class, and even after you had left the room the scent of you would linger in his nose. he would go to his room, look up your instagram handle and jerk off to your highlights each time.

so when he saw you at this party, in clothes that you didn’t wear in class, he knew he had to have you. the skirt you wore was so short, and he was praying that he could get close enough to you to get you to bend over in front of him. and the top that hugged your tits perfectly, he just wanted to put his hands on them, and his mouth.

after a few shots, you were starting to feel the liquor. everyone in the party had moved to a different area to play beer pong, but you opted on being a moral support for your friends. a warm hand grazed your waist and a soft excuse me left the mystery persons lips as they tried to move next to you. before you could retaliate to the unwanted touching, you realized who the person was.

“wonbin?” you look up confused, not expecting to see the boy at a party like this. he was so quiet next to you in class you wouldn’t think that he’d hang around people this wild.

“y/n!” his voice was almost slurred, and you could tell the both of you definitely had a couple drinks in your systems.

“what are you doing at a party like this?”

“oh yknow… im friends with the host. i’ve never seen you at one of his parties before, what brings you here?” he eyes you, and you suddenly feel shy under his gaze. he didn’t have that soft look to him right now like he usually had. it was dark, and you didn’t know if you liked it.

“free alcohol, hot guys, the usual college party!” you laugh, and he nods along with you before you turn back to watch the game of beer pong in front of you.

getting to the bottom of your cup of vodka redbull, you try to push your way through the crowd of people to get to the kitchen. little did you know, that wonbin was following close behind you. once you were in the kitchen, you finally noticed the long haired boy behind you. truthfully he was checking you out the entire time, the way you walked with so much confidence really entertained him. of course when you turned to see him, he looked away as if he wasn’t even there.

“didn’t know you were following me,” your voice was soft while you looked up at him, and he still had that dark look in his eyes.

“well yeah, wanted to make sure you didn’t get lost. also… we have the good alcohol stored downstairs if you want that instead of this cheap vodka,” his voice lingered and your eyes lit up.

“wait, really?”

“for a pretty girl like you, of course. but i want something in return…”

thats how you ended up in the basement bathroom getting fucked by wonbin.

propped up on the sink counter, holding yourself up by your hands behind you, while he he has a hand on your waist and one around the back of your neck. you moan out, his cock bullying into your cunt with no sign of slowing down. his grip on your waist so tight you’re sure theres going to be a bruise when he lets you go.

his hoodie discarded somewhere on the bathroom floor, leaving him in just a white tank and his pants pooling at his ankles. he had your shirt lifted up so your tits would be on display for him, along with your skirt flipped up and tights ripped so he could see your dripping pussy while he fucked you.

“wonbin… fuck” you cry, one of your hands going to rest where his was on your waist. he swats it away, and you bring it back to its original position of holding you up.

his hand around the back of your neck prevented you from looking anywhere else that wasn’t at him, so your eyes switched from looking at his face to how his cock disappeared inside of you. it was honestly disgusting how lewd this was… fucking this boy you’ve never even had a complete conversation. the sounds of your pussy squelching and skin slapping filling the room, almost as loud as his groans and your whimpers.

“feels good, pretty girl?” his voice was like honey, but you felt like you wouldn’t be able to speak so you just give him a nod. he didn’t like that though, hand around your neck traveling to your face to hold you by your jaw. “words. need words”

his hand around your waist sliding down to pinch your clit with his thumb and index finger. “feels good! feels so good wonbin” voice hoarse, you look at the boy through your teary eyelashes. he lets out a chuckle in satisfaction, picking up his already impossibly fast pace while looking you in the eye.

“good girl, gonna fill this pretty pussy up” still holding you by your face, he leans in to put his mouth on yours. it was wet and sloppy, no real rhythm just teeth clashing and tongue’s colliding. other fingers swirl around your clit making it hard for you to kiss him back.

“gonna cum, wonbin” you moan into his mouth, biting his lip after the words slip out. his fingers add more pressure to your clit, making you lightheaded.

“go ahead and cum, pretty girl. make a mess all over my cock” his words were enough to make you reach your peak, the string in your core finally snapping as your orgasm hits. hands that rested behind you move to pull wonbin closer to you, now chest to chest as you shake under his body.

his own orgasm hits him, your cunt squeezing him so tight to where he could barely move, pumping his seed deep into you with a loud whimper.

the two of you stayed connected for a few minutes, before he pulled out and grabbed some toilet paper to clean you up. you try your best to make yourself look presentable before you go back upstairs, lipstick smudged and mascara running only slightly. thank the universe for waterproof mascara… you think.

“i’ll go get that vodka now,” wonbin is quick to put himself back in his pants and get his hoodie on, slipping out of the bathroom.

can u tell i got carried away with this one? it wasn’t too pervy but i hope you still liked it !!

[guppybibi]

Ditzy Princess

𖦹 pairing: Iwaizumi Hajime x fem!reader

𖦹 word count: 2019

𖦹 content: mild cursing, childhood friends to lovers (eventually..) , denial, she fell first but he fell harder, reader is oikawa’s little sister, reader’s brain is a lil empty, but she's a strong woman nonetheless!!

𖦹notes: i have so many wips..but hajime my Filipino king AUGHH (im gaslighting myself shh)

✧. ┊    Part 1

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Being Oikawa Tooru’s little sister meant that you were equally as insufferable as him, debatably even more than him according to Iwaizumi. Iwa wouldn't go as far to say he disliked you, despite you being 2 years younger than Oikawa, the three of you still grew up together and developed a pretty strong bond. Oikawa had his moments, being the seemingly arrogant and egotistical person he is. Iwa was aware Tooru had some issues with his self esteem and was helping him in his own way. But in your case, nothing was backing you up. You really were just a crybaby diva, wailing as her big brother comes to save her. It really didn't start off so bad, after all you were a child who needed guidance and protection. He expected you to just grow out of it, news flash—you didn't.

Now that you're in your first year in Seijoh, he couldn't avoid you at all no matter how hard he tried. Being a headache must be in the genes, I guess. But you weren't worth putting up with, so he just started distancing himself away from you. Sure, sometimes you would barge into the gym, interrupting their practice to go to your doting brother. Which pissed him off, obviously. Though it was hard to tell since he always had a scowl on his face no matter the situation. Oh and by sometimes, he means every single day–unless you were absent or something.

Unfortunately for him, Oikawa wasn’t present today due to getting a nasty cold. Normally he’d make fun of Oikawa, along with the rest of the Seijoh four but he remembers that you’re present and that he would be your temporary savior while your brother is gone. It didn’t help that today in particular was a pretty stressful one, and as if the Gods above cursed him, a bunch of assholes picked on you for being the ‘uglier’ sibling. A bunch of envious little liars.

Naturally, it was your first instinct to go to annoy him. Your muffled cries could already be heard before you've even entered the gym, which made Hajime groan in annoyance as he muttered a random curse under his breath. And as if on cue, the metal door of the gym slides open; unveiling a very much messed up you.

Your mascara all smudged across your pretty face, fat tears staining it. Your subtly pink lips all wobbly as you make your way to Iwaizumi, knowing your brother wasn't here. At this point, this was basically a daily routine for the team, they didn't complain though. You coming in here and taking their captain and or ace meant they had an opportunity to take a break.

“ ‘Zumi! T-they were being so mean to me again, I didn't do anything wrong!” You cry out as you approach the ace with a pout on your face. ‘Pathetic..’ He thinks to himself, you were more than capable enough to defend yourself. (Verbally, at least. Physically is a different story.) “It's not my fault I don't look exactly like Oikawa! And I can't do anything about it, why pick on me for it?!” You continue, wiping away a tear from your glossy eyes.

Hajime couldn't even say anything in response, this wasn't the first time you came to him after someone bullied you for whatever reason. It was a sad thing to happen to you, but did you really have to go to him or your big brother every single time? What if they're not there for you? What will you do then? Still his good conscience couldn't just leave you sobbing like that, your doting brother wouldn't be happy about it.

Placing a rough calloused hand on your trembling shoulder, as an attempt to comfort you he starts speaking. “And what did you say to them after?” He asks, it was a completely normal question, you knew that. But you were used to just..constant coddling, no other questions asked–just instantly tending to you. “I..Nothing? I mean, maybe what they're saying is true..it still hurts though..” You reply, earning a nod from your older brother's friend. You had a point there, but you should still stick up for yourself! You had to learn, plus he didn't want to keep playing as your knight in shining armor when the two of you are pushing your thirties.

“Did you want to say something back to them?” He questions, raising a brow. You could be doing this for shits and giggles for all he knows, maybe this was a plan you and Oikawa had or something. “Well um, kind of?..” Even that answer somehow made sense, coming from a ditz like you–he didn't really expect much. “So can you or can you not defend yourself?” He asked yet again with a gruff voice, watching intently as he saw you shake your head. Okay, cool. You aren't doing this just to piss him off, that's a start.

“I could teach you, if you want to.” You blink once, twice. “Teach me how to..fight for myself?” You never considered it, you were just used to your big brother being there for you. No matter how serious or stupid it was, he’d be there in a flash. He nodded, crossing his arms as you thought about it. Your brother wouldn't always be here, today was proof of it. The same goes for Hajime, who knows where he's going after high school?

“I..think that’ll be nice actually.” And those were the words that started your tutoring sessions. You were incredibly nervous the first few times, like the personification of an earthquake. You did soon manage to get the hang of it, being able to defend yourself against your bullies unless it was really necessary for your brother and or him to step in.

To be honest, Oikawa was pretty opposed to the idea at first. Saying to his best friend that teaching her all of this ‘nonsense’ wasn't needed since he’ll always be there for her anyway. (What Oikawa didn't know is that Iwa was doing future him a favor, I mean–he didn't know he was going to Argentina!)

And so ‘Operation: Teach Y/N How to Defend Herself’ was successful. It had been like years ago at this point, barely remembered by you two like some distant memory. You didn't piss him off that much anymore, though he did have little to no contact with you; only getting updates through Oikawa.

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When he went to Irvine, California for personal matters he was aware of you being there as well since you went to visit and stayed at your grandparents. The chances of you two meeting were slim but fate had to play its part too! Now the both of you were sitting side by side, having a cup of ice cream as you catched up on your lives.

He told you about the meeting he just had with Takashi, some stuff about sports science and his personal life and whatnot. While you told him about life here in the States, being taken care of by your overbearing grandparents and stuff. You were a lot more mature than what Hajime had remembered, still a scatterbrain though. Though something comes up, leaving Hajime at some random bench while he taps away on his phone after you exchanged him your number. Saving it and putting in ‘Puny Princess’, it was stupid–he knew it was as he chuckled to himself.

No matter how fully grown you are, you’ll always be that spoiled little brat who seeks her dear knight in shining armor's protection.

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He was flying back to Japan soon, and he wanted nothing more but to cancel his flight and stay here–with you. Highschooler Iwaizumi would be laughing his ass off right now, any chance to get away from you was a blessing. He’d get on that plane like he's being chased by the police. He thought about it a lot, was it because you were less of a pain in the ass? Nope, that couldn't be the case because you still were. Sure, you didn't exactly need Prince Charming anymore which made you considerably much more bearable but it felt like there was something more to it. Why won’t life just tell him instead of forcing him to dig through a bunch of dirt in his mind?

Maybe he simply got used to being around you, to be fair–he’s been with you through thick and thin after all. Yup, that's what it was. No need to manually crank the gears in his brain anymore, this was totally it. Would he admit he had a teensy weensy little crush on you when you two were kids? God no, and that doesn't matter! I mean, that was like a decade ago–he doubts that mattered right now in any shape or form.

Well the first stage of grief was denial, he’ll work his way up. You, on the other hand, have fully accepted this stupid happy crush you got on Iwaizumi. Even your big brother knew about it, well you were pretty much an open book. Hey, your brother’s words–not mine. The way your cherubic cheeks would heat up when Hajime helped you up when you got yourself stuck in the mud, it was painstakingly obvious that you had liked him ever since.

You and your big brother had a heart to heart talk about back in middle school actually, it sits there playing constantly at the back of your mind.

It was midnight and Oikawa had come home late, you noticed he had been practicing overtime these days which worried you quite a bit but you knew Hajime was there to keep him grounded. So that's how the two of you ended up at 1AM, your brother silently eating his late cold dinner while you accompanied him.

“Did ‘Zumi practice late with you..?” You questioned, breaking the growing silence in the room. In response, he nodded and let out a dry chuckle. “Mhm, you haven't spoken a word since I got home and when you decide to speak it's about Iwa-chan? Do you not care about your dear big brother anymore?” He asks, dramatically feigning hurt as he places a hand on his chest.

He didn't miss how your lips went and formed a thin line, trying your best not to crack a smile. “Cmon, don't lie to your big brother–you like Iwa, don't you?” He teases, trying to get it out of you like he's sipping the very last drop out of the milk carton. “Maybe just a little..” You mumble, finding it just a little bit embarrassing that out of all the fish in the never ending sea, you manage to have feelings for your brother's best friend. “Hm..well I guess if you were to pick someone to marry I’d honestly prefer Iwa y’know?” You almost choke on your own spit upon hearing his words, blushing furiously. “E-eh?! Marry?! It's too early for that!” You exclaim, while your brother starts laughing like a hyena.

His words were very much true though, he trusted Iwa–so much so that if he had the chance to pick the person you’ll marry, he'd choose Hajime with no hesitation.

You roll around in your soft bed, unable to sleep as Iwaizumi’s face keeps flashing in your mind like a broken record. Wanting nothing more than to scream into your pillow, but your grandparents sleeping soundly in the other room prevented you from doing so. You wondered if you would ever go back to Japan, it seemed like your brother wouldn't after hearing him recently renounce his citizenship but it's not like you were going to follow in his footsteps. You've never felt this homesick before, stupid Iwaizumi–it's his fault for coming here unannounced. You thought your delicate heart moved on from this childish crush of yours after not seeing him in a couple of years, looks like it bounced back after meeting up with him again though..

Well, at least you had some form of communication with him after you gave him your number. That was temporarily enough for you.

[adorekento]

flirty scara x insecured reader? like maybe self loathing themselves 😙

Glimpse — Scaramouche

Synopsis: You were nothing but an ordinary student, People never attempted to approach you, Until a certain Indigo-haired dude asked you out.

warnings: self-loathing, flirt attempts, offensive content, bullying, ooc, etc.

notes: agghsge I'm sosorryyy for being inactive 😭😭🙏🙏 I'll js fix the error tmrrrrr and if there's grammars my apologies im half asleep when i wrote this 🙂🙂

"y/n."

A voice called out from behind, startling you out of your thoughts. Veering around, your eyes locked with the Indigo eyes that were fixed on you, "Uh, Yes?" you asked, baffled.

It wasn't every time people would call out to you. In fact, No one attempt to chat with you unless they ought something. You'd probably be more surprised if someone spoke directly to you and it's happening, the person talking to you is known all over the school for their coldness and mindset. So you were kind of thrown when he began speaking to you.

"Be my partner."

Gasps can be heard throughout the room as students turn to look at the male who just spoke up, when he finished his sentence, your cheeks bloom red. It was not the statement you anticipated, especially from him, and you're kind of dumbfounded.

'He's probably just... Ugh.'

"Pardon?" you ask politely, though unsure about what his intentions are with this whole situation. "Did you not hear me? I want to be your companion for the upcoming task." He continues, giving you an expectant look which you fail to return because you're still trying to process what he'd said.

"Huh?! Scara~ Are you sure you want to be partnered with this— thing? Come on! Think twice!"

"Unless he lost to a bet?"

"Understandable."

"Right! He probably lost to a bet that's why he's asking y/n for their help, they don't even seem interested, Haha!"

"Seriously? Scaramouche and y/n? Is he just trying to get them a good grade by partnering with them?? That's stupid,"

The whispers around you grow louder as everyone starts to make fun of you for the current situation you're in.

"T-Thank you for the offer, really, But I'm certain I can work alone on our lesson," you say with an awkward smile, "Maybe you could just try asking someone else instead," you manage to say while staring into his pretty eyes.

"No way! Are they actually refusing Scaramouche?"

'What the fuck do you guys want me to do then?! You were just judging me a few seconds ago because he wants to pair up with me! And now that I'm rejecting his offer you're mad too?! Ridiculous!'

"they think rejecting him is cool! It's not like they ALWAYS get a partner, right?"

"They might reject him just for looking like this and making them feel inferior,"

"Poor Scaramouche! How can someone like them reject him?"

The students went on to talk as you tried to maintain yourself calm and steady despite all these comments, but unfortunately, all that did was cause you to start feeling a little tense. Not enough to go wild or anything. Just a tiny amount. You could still deal with the ridicule, but not enough to get furious at them,

Scaramouche grimaced at the crowd of students who were talking about you while you were staring at the floor, Making them look away,

He picked up your bag off the ground and threw it over his shoulder, grabbing your hand to pull you out of the classroom with him. You didn't resist as he dragged you outside, ignoring everyone calling after him as they watched him go.

Once you two left the room, he eventually let go of your hand and kept walking. You followed behind him, keeping your mouth shut. It wasn't until he stopped in front of you and uttered, "Apologies for dragging you here against your will, and well- drawing attention onto us," he says awkwardly, scratching his neck with his free hand as he looked around,

"Also, it's not every time I do requests. I wish to be your partner for the project. we have mutual chemistry and I believe that working together would benefit both of us," he said grinning,

You blinked rapidly a few times, not knowing how to respond to such a sincere statement,

"...You're aware that bunch of people out there desire to have you as their partner for this right? I mean I am glad and surprised that you're inviting someone like me but you don't have to push yourself!" you respond nervously, fiddling with your fingers before rubbing your hands to keep from getting too nervous.

"Look, I won't force you. You can simply say no, you're only saying that because you care about what people think, Right?" he asked.

He stared at you for a moment. Then he grabbed your chin, making you meet his intense eyes. You gasped slightly at the contact, then relaxed after a second. "Just do whatever feels right to you, okay?" He sneered.

Your face flushed again as you nodded shyly at him. He smiled lightly at you before releasing your chin and letting go of your hand,

"Okay..."

—

After a few days, You've gotten closer to Scaramouche, everyday he would go to you and walk you home, helping you study in class and even hanging out at lunchtime.

it also took you a bit to realize that you were starting to develop feelings toward him, Who wouldn't? With his handsome features paired with his cold demeanor, plus that cute laugh of his whenever he speaks, you're sure to fall in love with him sooner or later, no matter how hard you try not to.

The earlier morning he asked you to hang out with him at the park near your house so you agreed, and now you're walking with Him beside you. It was quiet between you two, as you weren't much of a chatterbox.

The silence is mostly comfortable, though you felt your heart beating faster than normal, which made you panic slightly. Why is your heart beating this fast? Maybe you're sick!

You shake the thought away, it's probably nothing... "You alright?" Scaramouche asked, tilting his head slightly as if noticing you panicking a bit before shrugging.

You nod quickly, trying to avoid eye contact, "Yea! I'm fine, Sorry, Don't you think it's gotten cold? It's not even winter yet—"

Your rambling stops abruptly as you felt his arm move across yours to hold your hand tightly. "If you wanted to hold my hand, you could've just said so, instead of making absurd excuses," he grinned at you, squeezing your hand reassuringly,

"T-That's not—" you stutter. Your ears start burning from embarrassment. You really shouldn't let his charm affect you that easily. Or maybe it was just the way his touch felt so warm and inviting?

"What's that? Do you also want to kiss me? Now aren't we getting ahead of ourselves a little early?" he smirked down at you, leaning forward until you were nose to nose,

"I didn't even say anything— I wasn't going to!" You argued back, taking a step back from him as he chuckled.

His laugh was nice to hear, "Go ahead, I might let you." He whispered in an amused tone. The smirk remained on his face as he leaned forward again, bringing his other hand to cup your cheek, "Are you blushing?" he teased gently stroking it with his thumb while keeping eye contact with you.

Your body was heating up, it felt warm and tingly from all those butterflies suddenly fluttering around in your stomach, and your cheeks felt flushed due to his closeness. It was weird and uncomfortable how he had made you feel all flustered and embarrassed. You didn't know how to respond, so you simply closed your eyes, allowing your cheek to be caressed while his breath tickled your ear,

You felt his lips brush against yours and your heart began racing again. His thumb moved from your cheekbone and rested itself over your lips before moving slightly and softly kissing them. Your eyes flew open in shock. You stood there, frozen and completely dumbfounded as your heart rate increased drastically in both speed and volume,

"There, I kissed you." He snickered down at you, his voice low and smooth. His voice sends shivers down your spine and you blush more.

You shook your head slightly and cleared your throat before smiling at him,

"Right!" That was all you managed to mutter back.

You looked back at him for a second, then averted your gaze toward the ground once more. You couldn't believe that you got kissed by someone like Scaramouche! you didn't have any idea how to react.

but, to be fair, most girls would jump at the chance to kiss him when they first saw him, so you weren't complaining.

Your thoughts were interrupted when you felt his hand slide down your arm to grasp your hand and intertwine your fingers. You glanced down at your interlaced hands, then back up at him in confusion, "Are you fine with this?" he asked, looking at you curiously.

"Mhm! No worries." You nodded quickly as you started to walk, but hesitantly intertwined your fingers with his, causing his grin to widen.

"But... If any chance s-someone you know strolled by— we can quit holding hands, I don't want to embarrass you in front of your friends..." you mumbled, feeling his hand squeeze yours tighter.

"If someone I know happened to catch a glimpse of us, I'd pull you extra close."

© [ adorekento ] do not steal, repost, or translate my work.

[unamused-boss]

Ngl im literally obsessed with ur writeing rn so! I have a request! Could you do a billy x reader where you are in a band and you invite billy to a show and hes like your biggest supporter ever. OH and you play the guitar and are the lead singer ( Yall r highsxhool yall have no money) so yeah, tysm if you do the request!!!!

That's my Girlfriend!!!

Billy Hargrove x Fem Reader

Disclaimer: This maybe a bit short, underaged drinking, some harsh language

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"If I'm gonna be honest I'm actually shitting myself Billy." You panicked to your boyfriend. He looked to you softly.

"Can you stop shitting your pants, you will do great." He said.

"You really think so." You look to him with big eyes. He can't help but laugh at the state of you. The first night Billy had met you was, of course, at a party were you promptly punched him in the nose. To this day you say it was an accident but Billy knows it was on purpose. He was being an ass... and you both were drunk.

"Hey." Billy smiled to you. " You are going to give the most amazing show these hicks the best show of their lives and after we are going to have the best sex of our lives." Billy laughed as you punched him in the arm for the horrible sex joke. Your expression still did not change. He brought you closer to squeeze you into a hug. He kissed your lips as an announcement was heard throughout the bar.

"Everybody, I would like to introduce a new band to you. You don't know them, but many mothers have complained about their volume level. I'd like to welcome.... VELVET CONCORD!!"

There was a small clap echo that went through the Hide Out bar. That didn't help in any way for you. Your expression stayed the same, terrified.

"You got this babe." Billy whispered. You nodded.

"You ready girl?" Dusk asked right behind the both of you.

"With the amount of crap in my pants... I guess." You are unsure about this.

This has been your dream ever since you could play guitar. You met Thorn, Luna, and Dusk all in middle school. You guys came up with Velvet Concord for the middle school talent show in 1977. That show solidified your friendship. Sure you guys didn't win but you didn't care. You all found something that will bind you together forever. This show in this bar is your first real show, not one for some school dance or party with preselected music. You will be playing original songs that you wrote, with notes that Dusk came up with, bass from Thorn, and drums from Luna. You didn't want to screw this up for them.

We've dealt with so much bullshit. From bullying cause of how we dress, to our music, jeez it only stopped when you started dating Billy. Everyone would pick on us until they needed a band for the party, and in the words of Tommy H. "I'd rather have you than the freak and his band." At least you weren't the second pick.

You and Velvet Concord made your way on stage. You nearly tripping over some cords. You were sweating, so much sweat. My throat is dry. The lights are glaring down at me. ' I can't do this' 'I should give up'.... 'What am I doing?'

"Yeeeaaaah!" A voice broke you off your head. "Let's go Velvet Concord!" It was your Billy. The Billy you punch in the face. The Billy you asked out. The Billy that asked you to be his girlfriend. The Billy that told you how sexy you look in your stage outfit tonight. The Billy that has non stopped supported you once both were together.

"Um... Hello everyone we are Velvet Concord." You started. "This is my bassist Thorn, my drummer Luna, and my pianist Dusk." Okay you've introduced everyone.

Now the show begins.

"1...2...3..."

Your guitar was on fire. You were synced with the band as if it were second nature. The upbeat rock blared through out the Hide Out. Luna put every heart beat into her drums. You don't think you have ever felt so alive. Every lyric that was sang was like it was being constructed for the first time all over again. You're back in the garage practicing what cord goes were and what note was perfect. The set that your prepared for the night was selected perfectly. Nothing can beat this. The nervous sweat now turned to excitement. Screaming every note with passion. Everything was right, this is how it is supposed to be. Velvet Concord under bright lights, even if they were from some dingy rock bar. The last riff finally hit. Thorn played it out a bit as usual.

"But on my tombstone when I go just put death by rock and roll~"

There was an eruption of applause through the crowd. The lights were turned down now you could see everyone in the crowd. Everyone cheering for your band.

"That's my girlfriend!!" A shrill voice yelled. You laughed at Billy's antics. You didn't see where he was until a force came up on stage an tackled you into a hug.

"This is my fucking girlfriend!!" He yelled to the crowd. Which in return made them scream even louder at his banter. You looked behind to see your band mates laughing at your boyfriend. You step forward away from Billy for a moment.

"Thank you everyone!." You and your band took your, very much rehearsed, bow to the crowd. You quickly unhooked your guitar from the speakers to be dragged backstage by your boyfriend. As he turned you around he brought you in for a hot kiss. Which surprised you cause you thought this would be saved for later.

"You were the most amazing and sexy woman I have ever met!" Billy cheered to you. You laughed in response. He brought your into a bear crushing hug.

"Was it really that good?" you asked.

"Good? It was better than good, it was great!" He yelled.

"Yo Y/n, get your mans under control." Thorn laughed. "We've only just begun, if he's this excited about our first show he might wipe out by our next." You girls laughed along with her. Meanwhile Billy was smothering you with a hug. If your hair wasn't already frazzled it would have been a mess.

"Guys! Guys!" Luna shouted as she ran to you all. "Joel just gave me out check!" She waved. You quickly snatched it from her flailing hand.

"Oh my gosh!" Your eyes widen at the amount, sure for some it wasn't a lot but damn!

"Who want's to flipping celebrate!!" You cheered.

"Yeeeeeaaaaahhh" Everyone else cheered in agreement. Going to run out to the bar to party. Billy stoped for a quick moment alone.

"You really are the best girl ever." He smiled. you smiled to giving him a kiss on the lips.

"Now let's get wasted!" He cheered taking you along with him.

"Yeah!"

.........................................................................

Hope you enjoyed!

Fics are gonna be coming out a little slower cause of school plus I'm having writers block. But I will try to get a Halloween fic out by the end of the month!

[all-pacas]

i read all your house fics over the past few days and i love your style of writing. the dialogue fits the characters and show so well, idk what it is about it but it just clicks in my head and i can hear their voices while i read it. and all of their internal monologues are just perfect. i love the grasp you have on the ducklings' backstories and motivations its seriously inspired :))

now im trying to work on the oneshot idea ive been stewing over for an entire year, about chase being house's only fellow pre-canon, which seems like a weird and absurd situation to me. the idea is that something must have happened for him to basically be secured as house's fellow, but he also has to realize himself that he passed house's mysterious criteria. any specific tips for writing him? especially younger him?

Oh wow that’s so flattering! And SUCH a good idea for a fanfic, I’m also lowkey obsessed with the mysterious year (!) Chase spent with House pre-series lmao. Like I think we all agree, there’s no way House would have kept him just because his dad called, right? I actually can’t think of a way to get someone fired faster than telling House he has to employ this kid.

I have no idea for tips, because I feel like I still kind of am like ??? when it comes to Chase. But I’m also always happy to yell about god’s least favorite princess:

Chase is kinda passive-aggressive! He will do his best to avoid and freeze out his problems. When everyone is trying to talk to him about his dad, he ignores, refuses to engage, literally walks away. When House confronts him about the nun in S1, Chase doesn’t actually confirm that he’s Catholic, even: he just changes the subject to “I bet the nun’s boss knows about her.” By implication, he confirms House is right, but he never says shit. He’s private as hell. Likewise, he gets touchy when people “pry.” We also see it in his relationship with Cameron, to an extent: it bothers him for a long while that she never makes him feel welcome at her apartment, but he doesn’t say anything, just lowkey makes sure they’re always at his. 

He also tends to be conflict avoidant. When Cameron and Foreman are fighting over the “stolen” article, they both try to get him on their side, and he tells them both what they want to hear. He doesn’t defend himself against House’s bullying, Foreman tells him to his face a couple of times that he doesn’t like him and Chase says nothing. However, this doesn’t mean he’s that easy going. We see with his dad he will hold a fucking grudge forever — even in S5 he’s talking about how much he hated him, and in S8 and how he talks about his mother, we see he hasn’t stopped hating her, either. Also he calls out Foreman a couple of times, either by just being a little bitch (telling a patient “Foreman doesn’t like me either” while Foreman is right there) or by just laying things out for him (S7′s “oh, you think you’re better than me?” stairway rant). It also doesn’t mean Chase is totally spineless and has no boundaries. With Cameron, he actually dumps her when she tries to avoid him over the engagement, and has no problem calling off the wedding over sperm-gate. When things matter to him, he’ll stand up for himself; he just prefers to freeze out or avoid conflict. He also has no problem in confronting House when he feels like it. He’s not very scared of House, House just doesn’t bother him.

He also gains more… let’s call it confidence… as time goes on. Chase always seems to be pretty secure in his self-worth and idea of himself (and NEVER willingly opens up to other people), but over time he definitely becomes a little punchier. In S1-3 he’s willing to just sort of roll his eyes and take it when things happen, but by S4-5 he’s happy to call House or Foreman out and argue instead of just letting things go (passive-aggressively). He never gets any better at emotional honesty (his “punch House instead of talking about his divorce” thing is straight out of his S1 daddy issues playbook), but he does grow something of a spine. I imagine before the show started, he was even less prone to fighting back beyond snarky comments.

He genuinely finds House funny. He almost always laughs at House’s stupidest jokes, and as much as he’s accused of being an asskisser, he. Really just does think House is funny. Foreman and Cameron hardly ever react to House’s little comments, Chase is always grinning along. This is important. Chase’s sense of humor sucks! He is an idiot! He likes House. In S1 he says he likes how direct House is, there’s the way he always laughs at House’s jokes, he is absolutely a huge suck up also but he also likes House. I think pre-canon this was absolutely still the case. House comes in all prepared to make this little nepo-baby cry and instead Chase not just imprints on him but thinks he’s so funny and admires how mean he is and how smart he is. Chase really likes his job. He says it a lot, but I don’t know if it gets focused on all that much. He ratted to Vogler because he wanted to keep his job, he makes comments many times about how he won’t risk his job. He likes working for House, he wants to keep doing it, he will ass-kiss and work hard and throw people under the bus to keep it: with the Vogler situation, he was pretty willing to fight Cameron for it, and he and Cameron usually get along!

He’s very observant when he wants to be. He gets House; from his little monologue to Wilson in Private Lives we see he basically can analyze “House is looking at a book” and figure out it’s a fake book and that House is really invested in it. In S3, he’s able to pick apart House and Foreman’s resignation drama over like. Two sentences. In ‘Nobody’s Fault’ in S8, Chase is pissed with House (for really the first time ever), but also sees through his excuses to do differentials in the OR as excuses for House to check in, he knows House is worried: in S5, Chase realizes House is broken up about his father’s death without even seeing him. This is also something House appreciates about Chase, a lot. He says in S3 it’s why he hired him; House also tends to “reward” Chase by being pretty honest with him. When Chase asks him something, House usually answers him honestly. (with Foreman’s resignation, as soon as Chase calls him out, House admits it and they have an honest conversation on what House should do next; in S5, House wants a surgery done for personal reasons and admits it and why when Chase asks.) 

I think part of this is because Chase actually very rarely does ask House anything, and he never makes demands on House or his feelings. He accepts at face value that House is “fine” during Detox, he doesn’t try and fix or change him, in “Half Wit” when the others are scheming to get House tested or make amends with him, Chase tries (and fails) to act normal, and then just wants a hug. Compare like. Cameron, who keeps trying to change or push House into acting how she wants him to act (blackmailing him into a date, for example). I’m not saying House doesn’t care about her, just. House is more open with Chase than he is with a lot of people who aren’t Wilson. Also, Chase does not return the favor. He literally ran up the stairs rather than tell House about his daddy issues, lmao. It’s kind of crazy that House is arguably more open and honest with Chase than vice-versa.

Finally, despite all his secret seething passive-aggression and daddy issues, and the fact that honestly Chase could really benefit from therapy and anti-depressants? He is not a sad uwu baby. This is sort of a general rant, but. You see it all the tiiime in fanfic. And yes, he’s super fucked up. But he’s cheerful most of the time! He likes doing crazy things, he is often pretty sarcastic and makes bad jokes! He’s a flirt, even before his S7 manwhore days — in early seasons we see him check out girls in the hallways, flirt at parties, with residents and nurses. He has hobbies (he’s fairly sporty, if Cameron’s “your apartment was decorated by a drunk rugby player” comment is anything to go on), he likes to read and do crossword puzzles and surfs and skis. He tells bad jokes. He tends to be fairly self confident — he doesn’t just take it when he’s accused of making mistakes, he has no problems with social situations or interactions, he hilariously thinks women are attracted to his personality and not his looks, like, he thinks he has a winning personality, that’s incredibly funny. He’s not arrogant in that he doesn’t really have much of a need to prove himself (he’s pretty fucking unambitious, actually), but he definitely has the Good Looking Rich Kid mentality where he thinks he belongs in any given situation and that people like him. He also has the social skills to back it up. Because he represses and avoids and seethes instead of expressing emotions, he comes off as generally cheerful and laid back, you know? Why be sad when you can just repress everything and flirt with nurses instead!

Finally finally: he's a huge fucking crybaby. Have you seen how red his eyes get. He might try to be stoic and repress but he tears up at the drop of a hat. First time House bullied him he probably started to cry.

[spacexseven]

ohhhhh tuna you minx now im thinking about wet and pathetic subordinate au dazai.

it honestly never occured to him that he'd actually miss you if you were gone, you were nothing- less than nothing. just a rowdy grunt barely worth glancing at, destined to become nothing more than a forgotten name at the bottom of a filing cabinet and a bouquet of flowers anonymously sent to your family, if you even had any. you were just fun for him to play around with, that was all. he didn't even remember your name! or blood type! or favorite color or the way you pronounce certain words or your exact height or your eye color or your entire dating history or the fact that certain herbs (herbs that his book of dark magic SWORE were foolproof for love spells!!!) made you sneeze. none of this was information that he retained. nope. none of it at all.

but to be quite frank, the idea of suddenly no longer having unfettered access to you wasnt something he ever thought of before. in the port mafia's eyes, he pretty much owned you- you were officially packaged and licensed as a tool he could use as he wished, you leaving was never a worry! until it was. doesnt matter the reason- maybe mori picked you up for his own training or just moved you to a different unit, or you could've had to go on leave for a while and everyone is mean and wont give dazai your address, or maybe youve recently had a brush with death- as soon as the idea that you actually ARENT his property and its very possible that he could lose you sets in he FUCKING. PANICS. you cant go! youre HIS!

like you said, it goes from just a desire to get you back under his thumb to an overwhelming desperation for your love and acceptance. a mixture of overanalzying every single time you were ever kind to him and stalking you to the point where he knows everything there is to know about you makes him realize he's HOPELESSLY in love with you. he needs you more than he needs air. he'll DIE if you don't come back to him! he loves you more than anything! he'll do a lot of things to get even a second of your attention, even if its negative, he just needs you to talk to him, have your eyes on him. he'll cut it with the bullying at this point tho. as much as it hurts to be ignored, you being afraid of him makes him feel like hes imploding. if you instinctively move away when he reaches out for you he might actually tear up. speaking of which, falling to the floor in sobs and reaching for you like a child is not beyond him, he has absolutely no shame when it comes to you.

he'll only escalate the more you try to push him off or let him down easy, so honestly caving and giving him a chance might be your best bet. sure, he's incredibly unstable, dangerous, and you have absolutely no fond memories of him at this point- but on the plus side, you have an executive at your beck and call! hes FINALLY gotten into your good graces, and hell do just about anything to stay there- and hes actually pretty sweet when hes all lovey like this. I mean its less of a worshipping thing than you might want, hes still VERY certain he knows better than you and needs to take care of you now that you're officially his which causes some. issues. but oh well! better than letting him run rampant.

- 🩹

hello again!! so sorry it took me Forever to get to this im very very sorry

cw: yandere themes

when he hears that you might be shifted off elsewhere, dazai only pretends not to care, convinced that nobody would dare take you away from him. after all, who would want to make an enemy out of dazai? and even if you're gone, who cares?? he has tons of other people to pick on, tons of other things to do than mourn your absence.

it doesn't matter that the car he takes out is starting to look very empty with just him, doesn't matter that the driver's seat feels foreign to him after being accustomed to your presence. it doesn't matter that he has to start sitting on tables with just one chair in cafe's, doesn't matter that he still asks for your order as well and it definitely doesn't matter that the cat outside the base you always feed stops coming by anymore. it's not like he feels lonely, too used to another person by his side, not like you were of any use to him, anyway—all you did was drag him down!

you weren't anything special, nothing memorable about you, not the scars you earned after months in the pm, not the way disdain painted your face when dazai entered the room, not the way you said his name, and definitely, nothing stood out about you! he definitely didn't have a whole list of things written down about you, which included your favorite games and what groceries you got and what hobbies you had or even the number of interactions you had with each pm member (he also definitely did not cap the limit at 10 in a week, after which that person wouldn't be seen around you again).

but then it occurs to him that nobody else had the right to do that to him. regardless if you're in critical condition or sent off on some secret investigation, dazai is furious by the implications. the idea that you weren't ultimately under his direct command, the fact that someone else thought to meddle, it frustrates and infuriates him to no end. he panics, he throws a tantrum, but in the end, dazai's still not sated.

as dazai finally gains a crumb of self-perception, it finally occurs to him that he's in love with you, and he has no shame in letting the world know about it. he panics, wondering if you'd ever like him, but he pushes that to the back and focuses on what he can do. which ranges from stalking you to clinging onto your leg when you ignore him to even breaking into your home and nursing you. there comes a point where he is genuinely convinced that he might drop down dead if you ignore him any longer, mostly because he doesn't know how to deal with the pain of heartbreak and the guilt and the depression all sinking onto him at once. he has no shame in this situation, and no care for self-preservation, unlike chuuya. nothing matters more to him than you, and he won't stop at anything until you give in. and i agree that the more you reject him the crazier his attempts are going to get. the next thing you know, all of yokohama is going to wake up to him screaming about how much he loves you.

a lovesick dazai is an unstoppable dazai. while he appears like a fool in his attempts to win you over, he still maintains a cruel demeanor towards anyone else. if it makes you happy, he's ready to wipe out yokohama, or even just the person who cut ahead of you in line. just as long as you promise to stay by his side, of course. he's finally found a semblance of happiness, and he's willing to do anything to keep it. for the most part, if you're able to deal with him as a boyfriend despite his past with you, he's surprisingly not that bad. since it's dazai, there are still some glaring problems with the whole relationship, but for the most part, he takes on the role of an extremely doting boyfriend who just wants to keep you safe. and unlike chuuya, dazai doesn't ever let you know what dirty work he does to keep your relationship going—all his hard work would be for nothing if you were scared of him again, after all.

[nnephthyss]

webcam play - utahime x reader

plot: you and utahime have a long distance relationship and have a little fun on a webcam.

warnings: clit rubbing, fingering, praising, masturbation

wc. 1.3k

(also please don’t bully me! this is my first ever smut fic and im still learning so any nice criticism would help! thank youu.)

———————————————————————————

it’s been a few months since you met your bestfriend utahime through a game and ever since then you were attached to the hip. it wasn’t like you were gonna be able to see her anytime soon. she lived like what? three or four states away from you? it was impossible to go see her at this rate.

shortly after you two met, you started to have… feelings for her and weren't sure how to tell her. she tells you pretty much everything so you knew she liked girls but weren't sure if she’d like.. you.

you got the courage to tell her and she reacted quite well to your feelings. she reciprocated them actually. you both started to date, having a really good relationship at that but what hurt most was not being able to see each other except through a computer screen.

utahime had the great idea to do a webcam video so you both could see each other. you bought the damn thing, set it up and now here you are looking at the girl through a small camera.

“prettier than i remembered.” the dark haired girl says softly but with a bit of roughness to her voice.

she looked so pretty on the other side of the screen. her hair was messy and tucked behind her ears, instead of that signature bow she wore when she’d send pictures to you over text.

you always felt that weird tingling sensation in your tummy when you saw her or even thought about her. she was beautiful, not to mention sexy. you had only been dating for a couple months, not doing anything sexual at all but damn it, if you don’t think about it.

a small blush appears on your pale face through the dingy frame of the web camera. the lighting wasn’t the best and neither was the video quality. she still looked so mesmerizing in the dark shadow of her room, only being lit up by a small lamp on her desk.

“thank you.” you mutter nervously.

even after being friends for so long and now dating, she still gets you all hot and bothered by a couple words.

“whats the matter, baby?” she asks softly, shifting in her seat to get a better look at you.

the little place between your thighs practically *throbs* at the pet name. you look down, diverting your eyes to your lap as you fiddle with your fingers.

“n-nothing.”

she raises an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. she gives you that look. you sigh and look back up at her.

“nothing, you just make me nervous uta.” you use her little nickname and she shifts in her seat again but not to get comfortable this time.

she nods her head and smiles at the nervousness written all over your face. she clearly knew there was something else behind those pretty eyes of yours. so she waits for you to continue and it makes you even more aroused at the the thought of her being so assertive.

“i’ve been thinking of you.” you start and then she leans closer to the camera like she’s trying to hear you better, so you speak up.

“thinking about you sexually.” you finish.

she was slightly taken off guard but now fully surprised because she’s been thinking about you the exact same way. she leans her elbows on the sides of her chair and takes a small breath.

“yeah baby?” she asks softly, smugness in her sweet tone.

“yeah and i-“ you try to say but embarrassment gets the best of you and your words die off.

“you what, love?”

fuck, now why did she have to use such sweet nicknames that made your cunt twitch? you keep your eyes on her through the computer screen and take a small breath.

“I touch myself thinking about you. o-only because i miss you and i can’t see you.”

you try to make up and excuse but utahime didn’t care. she was satisfied with what you were sayin. A glimmer hits her dark eyes and she smiles more, like grins.

“oh you have? and can you show me how you touched yourself, baby?”

your jaw almost drops open when that question falls from her mouth so seductively. you stutter for a moment, words dying off in your throat when you try to speak. you were flustered, heart beating fast and neediness racing through your blood.

she watched closely as you start to pull down your sleep shorts. the fabric falls down your thighs and then you kick them off to the floor along with your delicate lacy panties. you were sitting in one of those rolly chairs, so you swallow hard and spread your thighs in the space of the chair.

utahime swallows hard, her throat becoming dry at the view of your soaking wetness that you present to her. she grasps at the handles of the chair and scoots as close as she can to the monitor.

“now go ahead, baby.” she says softly, urging you to show her what you do when you’re all alone.

you don’t hesitate, right hand coming down between your thighs and running a slender finger through your slick. a shaky breath slips from your lips, chest rising and falling at the sensation already.

utahimes eyes are glued between your legs. she licks her lips, thinking about all the times she’s dreamed of seeing you like this.

“ah yes, just like that pretty girl.” she praises as you start to rub small circles around your puffy clit.

you whimper at her words, the praises that fall from her mouth, making you more aroused. you were trying your not to just come at the slow motions but her eyes were on you and her voice. it was killing you.

you speed up your pace, quicker circles and a small moan escapes your throat at the sensation. you can feel that familiar sensation rise in your stomach. burning pleasure runs through your clit and up your spine.

“uta..” her nickname slips from your mouth in a whine.

your eyes were almost drilled shut at this point. mouth quivered, lip underneath your top one as you bite down hard on it. you draw your other hand closer, slipping a single finger into your aching hole and she can’t feel her own self getting heated.

her eyes are on your soaked cunt. she can see the wetness dripping down your thighs and hand at how drenched you were. you suck in a small breathe, body writhing as you start to curl a finger slowly but quickening your pace once you get adjusted.

she watched closely, eyes glued to your face now. she curses to herself at how beautiful you look. your toes start to curl, hands getting tired but you don’t stop because you were so close.

“gonna come.. uta!” you cry out, legs threatening to close.

she nods her head, licking her lips and leaning in even close if that’s possible. she watched as your head fell back against the chair, thighs twitching against the handle bars.

“come for me, pretty girl.” she coos.

after that comes from utahimes mouth, it’s over for you. a loud cry rings through your bedroom and through the webcam speaker. she watches as your body convulses against the chair, your thighs squeezing shut around your hand as you come.

“ahh that’s it.” she murmurs to you, voice rough with desire.

you whimper, coming down from your high. your eyes open and you see how mesmerized utahime looks from the little show you gave her. a small grin comes to your lips but there was still embarrassment deep down inside of you.

finally you withdraw your hand away from your overstimulated cunt and close your legs, squeezing your thighs shut and making eye contact with utahime.

“did so good for me, pretty girl.” she whispers with a large grin on her face.

———————————————————————————

[sbk-zgvlt]

hi hi hi hello hello!!!!! i am MUNCHING on ur sebek and yuu au, if you’re feeling up to it could i ask what book three would look like???

love your work, and i hope your day is well!! make sure to drink some water and stretch ur back<333

thanks for reminding me to dirnk water i genuinely forget to do that and i need to take care of my voice for my recital 🙏🙏🙏

BOOK THREE LETS GO

Sebek and Yuu studied together in the library before the exams with Grim (Dia 3 was sitting in the lounge wondering where Sebek was for their study session)

Yeah thats it OKAY onto the part where they found out adeuce and grim got sea anemone'd

SEBEK IS SO BETRAYED. HE STUDIED WITH GRIM. HE THOUGHT HE WAS GETTING SOMEWHERE WITH THAT FUCKING CAT. HE GENUINELY TEARED UP (Yuu beat Grim's ass)

He shouted at Adeuce that theyre fucking idiots, they knew what they were getting into, theyre idiots again, take the L, you buried your own grave (Highly exaggerated)

Sebek told Deuce that he thought he was smarter than this. turns out he was just like Ace. "I'm not mad, I'm disappointed." Sebek says, clearly fucking MAD as hell

Deuce genuinely felt guilty because nah man why is sebek nagging him like a mom 💀💀💀

They decide to help them out 🙄🙄🙄 ONLY because Grim was with them though (Thats a lie)

They tried to meet with Azul but Jack AND Sebek got forced to work to help out Adeuce and Grim

Jade tried to make Sebek play waiter but he genuinely could NOT hold up a social interaction (He almost teared up talking to a customer) (The customer felt pity on him)

...he made Sebek work in the kitchen (HE IS IN HIS ELEMENT HE IS THRIVING) (Jade wonders if he can get Azul to employ him)

The finally meet with Azul!!! Blah blah blah contract blah blah blah. They give Sebek the same water-breathing potion. Sebek looked weird when he accepted it from them but no one paid too much attention

When theyre at the mirror everyone drinks the potion except Sebek. Yuu wanted to ask why but then the potion did its work 🔥🔥🔥 Everyone travelled to the Coral Sea

Everyones safe and sound before Yuu remembers that SEBEK DIDNT DRINK THE POTION. BUT HE STILL JUMPED IN AFTER THEM. They panic before realizing that Sebek is...okay in the water????

CROC FORM BABY 🔥🔥 Yuu finds out that Sebek is half crocodile (the fae part still being unknown to them)

He actually helps them hold out a bit longer against the tweels, but sebek acknowledges that theyre at a disadvantage here. He gets everyone to retreat

He tries to stop the others when they want to get into azul's office to get the contracts 🙏🙏🙏he just cant wrap his head around WHY he has the vault out in the open like that in his office. not even curtains??? what the hell

He stays behind when they still go inside

Yuu meets Hornton again 🔥🔥🔥 Calls him by the nickname. Malleus is amused, before shaking his head and asking whats got them troubled. At the end of their talk Malleus almost asks how Sebek is doing but cuts himself off.

blah blah blah yuu's gutsy plan blah blah blah AZUL OVERBLOT 🔥🔥

im going to take a LOT of creative liberties with his overblot because i want his fight to be underwater 🙏🙏🙏Sebek uses his croc form to help Yuu get to Azul. "Wont Yuu drown immediately" Remember the water potion that Sebek didnt use? YEAHHH. YEAHHHHH

They snap him out of it when Yuu and Sebek coincidentally find a picture from the yearbook that has Azul floating around the water while trying to swim to him. They hand it to the tweels and they show it to Azul, shouting shit about how whether he was the Azul from then and now, theyre yet to find him boring (Theyll never find him boring). "Pretty lame youre overblotting now though lol" "Floyd."

Azul's tragic backstory 🔥🔥🔥Yuu finally realizes Sebek is somehow with them when they see this. Sebek looks uncomfortable when Azul reveals he was bullied and WHY he was bullied

THEY DID IT WAHOO!!!! When Azul complains about the yearbook photo, Sebek mutters something about knowing how he feels. Yuu is the only one to hear this

Leona says if its normal that Grim is trying to eat a stone. Sebek immediately pounces on Grim to get the stone out

Sebek tries to go to Diasomnia again to see if the door's still locked, Hornton's here again!!! Thanks them for the advice, before they hear Silver trying to find Malleus. Malleus doesnt disappear right after though, so Silver walks off to try and find him somewhere else

They finish their conversation and Yuu hears the front door closing and opening. Yuu grumbles to themselves saying that Sebek probably got locked out again. "I swear if I meet his Wakasama I'm going to beat his ass" Hornton whistles

Malleus leaves and Sebek comes inside Ramshackle looking sad. "Locked again?" "...yeah" They stay up a bit to share stories with each other. (And to get Sebek's mind off of Diasomnia)

[not-alien-girl-v]

some george fluff, maybe him and reader are childhood friends, or they’re in their school era ( idk if that makes sense💀) and they’re just pining for each other but neither know the feelings are mutual

Heartbreak Girl (George Daniel)

warning: drinking, moshing, smoking, language

note: of course i understand what that means i’m the same bitch who called mattys 2013 tumblr days his ‘small era’ also im starting to realize a lot of you people are british. weird. im from california and in PST but some of you are european or whatever. strange

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

the blood is rushing straight to adam's head from where he lays upside down off of y/n's bed. the comforter is pink, mirroring the walls which are the same hue, so him and his leather jacket look out of place. she's sat at a vanity, carefully applying mascara to what's left of her lashes.

"so why are you so against having fun again?" he asks, out of genuine curiosity but it sounds like he's poking fun.

she snaps her head around, hair whipping around at her shoulder. "it's not like that. i'm not against fun. i just had a... thing... the last time i went."

he sits up, twisting upright to lean back on his elbows. "define 'thing.'"

polaroids from over the years are used as cheap decorations in this pink bedroom of hers. they’re taped the walls, tucked into the edges of this vanity mirror, and unbeknownst to anyone else, she hides a few intimate ones under her mattress.

they aren’t dirty or lewd, but they depict george daniel at some of his most beautiful moments, or so she believes, and they’re private enough that she doesn’t want anyone to walk in and see them, so she keeps them private, just for her.

sighing, "it was george," she's interrupted by adam's loud groan of annoyance but continues anyway, "he was just being weird to me. a bit cold, and he was completely sober through it because he was driving home, so it wasn't like 'greening out' kind of weird it was just him being bitchy to me. i'm scared he found out i like him or something, so i've been keeping my distance."

"just avoid him tonight. if he's choosing to be so cold to you, i'm sure he won't seek you out. you'll be fine."

the makeup adds pounds of weight to her face and she feels undesirable, but then again, she feels the same without the makeup, anyway. it’s a way of life to her.

she’s like a little child in her mothers pearls and heels, like an ugly girl in a paper mache head of a pretty one. she’s always wondered where this sprouted from. it’s not like she has some incredibly beautiful sister she’s been compared to, and she was never harshly bullied growing up, or if she was, george would have taken care of it for her. ‘no one makes fun of her but me,’ he would say.

"you're right. when did you get so wise, hann?" she begins applying a wine red lipstick to her lips precariously, when the door to her room is slammed open by ross, who is careless as he stands there. the red leaves a large smudge off of her lips and she turns back to glare at ross.

"you're still going tonight?" he asks, not caring to read any context clues. "nice lipstick, is that how girls are doing it these days?" he laughs cruelly, like a mean older brother. she throws a decorative pillow his way as he laughs himself out of the room.

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

she hops out of hann's car, doc marten boots clunking on the pavement below. with one quick glance around the landscape of the parking lot, she doesn't see george, which is a good sign, meaning she can proceed with her normal routine, which starts with a cigarette outside.

she started smoking at 16, and now, at 18, she’s more than addicted to it, but it’s just another issue in her life she’ll push aside and never address until it inevitably causes her downfall.

she's adjacent to the entrance, but she always hangs around outside for a few minutes before she buys her ticket and heads inside. cupping her hand around the lighter, the flame flicks into motion and burns the tip of her thumb in the process. a large, looming figure approaches her from her peripheral and it’s roughly six feet and four inches tall and she knows it's already too late.

removing the stick from her mouth as a courtesy, she turns to face george, lazy smile on his face. "i knew i'd find you out here," he grins.

"you found me." she's not sure what his angle is here right now, why he's smiling, why he sought her out after making it abundantly clear the last time they met that he was no friend of hers.

"well, come on, i'll buy your ticket, come," he grabs her by her wrist and she sneaks it out of his grasp but follows him to the entrance table, where one person sits with a cashbox and a marker.

"it's fine, you don't have to," she reaches around to dig cash out of her back pocket but he halts her, again, grabbing her, and she can see now just how drunk he is, he is normally way less handsy when sober.

"no, please, i insist, it's no problem, not when it's you." the words make her tingle in an odd way and she swears to herself every time that its a feeling she will ignore but she never can.

"what's that mean?"

"it means i owe you money, anyway." he hands the cash to the collector and the person draws an x on the back of her right hand with their marker, ensuring her paid entrance.

"hey, i'm gonna... um..." she's pointing to the entrance where she intends on going but george has already gotten distracted in speaking to somebody working at the merch counter. it's whatever. he's always like this, his attention is never long-lasting, and sometimes she swears that's part of the appeal. that he never seems to care too much, he's so nonchalant, like his attention is something she needs to work for, to earn. something about the 'chase' or whatever.

when the 1975 isn't playing a show at this small venue, adam and ross tend to volunteer to work at the functions, doing small things such as selling drinks and snacks, cleaning up here and there, but it's mostly just an excuse to hangout. tonight, adam is selling the snacks and drinks. ross is supposed to be, as well, but he's just eating the snacks, mostly, sitting behind adam so he doesn't have to deal with customers.

"can i get a cup of coffee?" she asks adam, who greets her with a bright smile. his expression is warm, almost apologetic, he's speaking with his eyes, 'how are you doing tonight?' adam is by far her best friend on this earth.

believe it or not, george used to hold that title for years, until she met adam through george a few years ago, and despite him being two years older, the two got along swimmingly, brought even closer once she realized her feelings for george, which ultimately wedged it's way between her friendship with him.

she even dated adam for 2 strange months before they both came to find that they were better off as friends, and they've been even closer ever since.

"ay, is george being a dickhead again?" ross yells from the back, a bag of chips in hand and also filling up his crunching mouth. he has a habit of speaking with his mouth full. "what'd he do. i'll fuck him up if he's been bad again!"

his threats are empty, ross is too much of a lover to be a fighter, and she knows he's just saying it to make her feel better.

"he's fine. it's all fine, stop looking at me, stop worrying about me, i'll survive this tonight, i'm fine." she informs and adam doesn't believe it, his skeptic gaze following her all the way to the couch that's located in the back room.

the show is in between bands right now, with a total of 4 playing tonight. the first one finished up their set a few minutes ago so the stage room consists of one band packing up and the next band setting up to play.

as she sits silently on the couch, sipping away at her coffee, she notices george walk past her, not stopping to talk or sit or even look her way, which is fine, why wouldn't it be? it's not like they're supposed to be friends or anything. right?

he walks past again, looking lost.

the third time he passes, she calls out for him, "g? what are you doing?" he looks genuinely surprised to see her sitting there on the couch, like she's just suddenly gained visibility and she hasn't been sitting on the couch the whole time.

his dopey drunk smile shows up on his handsome face again, curly brown hair in the way of his eyes and he plops his heavy body down next to her on the old couch, making her bounce a bit on the other end. there's only room for two on this couch.

she makes eye contact with adam from across the room, and it's like he can bluetooth connect to her brain just through one thoughtful glance, but through the wireless connection, she informs him that 'its fine,' like that's her new catchphrase for the night. adam nods but doesn't let the two on the couch out of his sight.

"i was looking for you."

"you found me."

"hey, you said that already," he pokes his finger into her cheek and she smiles, bashfully pushing his hand down. "ok wait, when the next band plays will you get up and dance with me?"

"i don't know, are you going to throw me into the pit again, mister?"

he laughs all too loudly for a private conversation, "for the last time, honey, it wasn't me, i swear!"

she huffs, rolling her eyes, "sure, yeah, you just happened to be standing right there with a guilty look on your face. shit hurt, that guy punched me so hard i got a black eye! you remember that?"

he gets silent and still, a little too silent and too still before he suddenly blurts out, "i punched that guy afterwards."

"what?"

"he knew better than that. i wasn't just gonna stand there and watch him push you around like that, it isn't right."

she's blushing now. she wishes she wasn't, but this is the world she lives in. she speaks small, "you didn't have to do that."

"of course i did. that's what friends are for."

"right."

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

once they hear the heavy drums introducing the first song of the next bands, george is quickly up on his feet, reaching out his hands for her to grab, and he pulls her up with too much force, sending her flying into him, which she chooses not to discuss as she wordlessly continues next to him over to the stage room.

people have already filed into the room, forming a decent sized crowd, and even aside from the heavy music playing on the stage before them, it's loud.

she stands awkwardly by his side, not knowing if she should dance or mosh or leave the room or go home or go cry about it to adam in the next room. however, once the crowdkillers come in, throwing themselves blindly into the confines of the crowd, george makes a point to pull her out of harms way.

it's thoughtful, it's really thoughtful, that he doesn't want her to get hurt by anyone, that he doesn't want anyone to touch her, or maybe it's just that he feels guilty for last time. either way, he threw his arm around her shoulder and held her steady there to his left.

then, seemingly out of nowhere, matty crawls out from the midst of the crowd, shit eating grin plastered over his stupid, stupid face. "don't you two look cozy. almost like a real couple."

in this very moment, matty is the worst man in the world and she wishes him nothing but death in his future. she also wishes she never confessed her crush on george to matty because, of course, he can't shut his big fat mouth.

but then george does the unthinkable, he gets a fake-serious expression on his face and pulls her in by the shoulder to a tight, messy hug. her face is smushed into his shirt but it's not like she's complaining. she waits to see what happens.

"of course she's my wife and i love her. we have two dogs at home and a horse," he seems to laugh his ass off at his own joke, something about the horse really doing it for him.

knowingly, matty responds, "you're wasted, man," he claps george on the back like best buddies do, then to y/n, "i trust you'll get him home safe, won't you, love?"

matty is a bit of a small guy and he doesn't have any fighting experience. if rage completely takes over her body, mixed with adrenaline, she's sure she can rip his entire head off and chuck it onstage. but george doesn't let go of her, so she'll never know if it's a possibility.

she reluctantly peels herself off of him and with an awkward feeling, "a horse?"

he laughs in her face, "yeah, a horse."

she decides to play along with it. "since when do we have a horse? i can't handle your spontaneity, we need a divorce.”

“fine. but i’m taking the horse. you can keep the kids.”

“i never even wanted the horse, silly,” the lights are on and the band’s set is over now, so she walks out the door of the venue and continues out to the parking lot, more than sure he’s following behind like a lost puppy. she’d take sappy drunk george over cold sober george any day.

the night is inky black and light pollution causes stars to cease to exist in the sky. it’s no big deal. y/n’s seen them before on other, clearer nights, and george just doesn’t care.

she leans against the stone wall of the building and george stops to stand right in front of her. he’s close. he’s too close. he’s not still in place. he’s jittery, fidgety, his hands wring together like his words will pour out of them like water if he squeezes hard enough. they never do.

she chews the inside of her mouth, maybe all the damage she does to her cheek from her teeth is the reason george never liked her back. maybe that was the big deal, the one reason that held the line.

but she knows things aren’t black and white like that. she knows it’s a cocktail of things all put together that george has observed about her over the many years growing alongside one another.

she could argue it’s near impossible to love someone through all the changes from childhood to adolescence, all the phases and new shapes an individual inevitably takes in order to find some peace of mind.

but it wouldn’t be true, because through it all, she’s still so in love with him.

she’s thought about writing him a letter. a long letter, it will cover everything she wanted to say, everything she almost did but never came out. in this letter, she’d magically gain the confidence and cadence of an old poet, an old soul who’s words are like honey to the tongue, and she’d give it to him.

no, she’d give it to adam to give it to him. no, she’d mail it to him. his mom would retrieve it from the mailbox and leave it on his messy desk where he wouldn’t notice it, much less read it, until she’s long gone, somewhere far, far away.

she’d go to london. no, she’d go to amsterdam. no, seattle. if he dared to read the letter word by word, between the lines, he’d find secret instructions telling him to meet her there.

wherever she ended up fleeing to, it wouldn’t matter, as long as she would be far, far away from the aftermath of confessing her feelings to him. she can’t imagine looking him in the eye when it happens, much less being right in front of him.

she’d stand at a distance, a 1,000 mile distance, and watch her life implode into chaos and she would have nothing to do with it until she chose to come back. or maybe she wouldn’t. and maybe when reading the letter, george would never know to meet her in seattle, maybe he’d get two lines in and he’d fold it up, crumple it, and toss it into his wastebin under his desk in his bedroom.

then maybe years later, she’d finally come home for christmas, and he’d have stayed there, he’d have waited for years and years for her. and by then, the city of seattle had changed her, she’d have lost the meaning of christmas, and george, who had taken up work at a local christmas tree farm, could return it to her with a few witty jokes and sweet kisses.

then she could sell the story to hallmark and leave again. maybe george could tag along this time. maybe the years apart aided him in gaining some worldly wisdom, and he’d know to follow when she walks out of her own life for the second time.

george’s fingers dig into her knotted hair. his thumbs parallel on each side of her frosty cheeks and his mouth is blowing warm air onto her lips.

she gasps, quiet and low, “what-“

he acts for himself and doesn’t let her finish her sentence, he traps her lips into the embrace of his own.

she always did wonder what it would feel like to kiss him. it had occurred in dreams many, many times before and once they parted, it would always be followed by some friendly remark, like ‘i was just curious to know what would happen’ and then the plot of the dream would continue on like normal.

but this isn’t a dream, this is real life, as real as it gets, and if she doesn’t act on this now, she may never get another chance.

she pushes him away, “what the hell george?”

he stumbles back, backing away from her absentmindedly. “fuck, god, fuck, i’m sorry, shit, i’m so sorry.” he grovels like it will fix this. “i’ll go, i’ll leave you alone, i’m sorry.”

now it’s her turn to grab him harshly by the arm. “fuck you, no. you’re staying here. we need to talk about this. why did you do that?”

“i’m so sorry, i’m so, so sorry. i’ve just had these feelings. for so long, i’ve had these feelings and i didn’t know what to do so i didn’t do anything and i know i should have but i didn’t and i’m sorry. and i thought that tonight was the right time and that you have feelings too but you don’t and that’s ok, i’ll leave you alone for now, i’m sorry i screwed things up with you, i hope you can forgive me.”

george doesn’t cry. it’s not in a toxic masculine way, it’s not like he’s not allowed to cry or he doesn’t let himself cry, but as a general rule of thumb, he simply doesn’t cry.

y/n’s known him for ages. even as a little kid, falling off his bike, tripping over his feet, blood could be gushing out of a fatal wound of his body and she swears he would just walk it off, free of any tears.

but now tears stream down his face. it’s a sight to see. he roughly wipes them away with the sleeve of his shirt, even looking surprised at himself to be crying.

and she isn’t quite sure what to do about any of this, she’s aware, now, that her initial reaction made her seem as though the kiss was unwelcome. and that’s far from the truth.

“stop. just stop.”

he’s got a desperate look on his face and it physically hurts to see.

“what do you want me to do? i’ll do anything. just tell me what to do.” he looks much more sober now. his eyes are more focused and he’s swaying a lot less.

“kiss me again. please.”

he just stands there, jaw slack. if he were animated, he’d have a big question mark over his head.

so she makes the move, instead. she holds him by the back of the neck and kisses him harder than he had.

he smiles into the kiss but again, he pulls apart, this time holding her head tenderly with both hands. “you’re confusing me,” he shakes his head.

“then i’ll make it simple. i’ve had the biggest crush on you since the first grade. here i was thinking i’d be the only pining idiot but now you’re here telling me you feel the same? i can’t believe it.”

he giggles, “you mean year 2?”

“that’s what you get out of this?”

he smiles wider. “can i take you home?”

“you’re drunk. i’ll take you home.”

“yeah, yeah that sounds good.”

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

taglist: @indierockgirrl @itssimpleanditgoeslikethis @milkluvr8 @americanangel

[burntnotices]

you know, fandom is weird for me.

im in a lot, passively and actively. i love a lot of things. but burn notice, you know?

its been the literal Sun to my Earth for over nine years now. sure, the fandom certainly predates me even being aware of its existence. (i was indeed in the single digits when it first aired.) but there was a period of time, roughly around 15-19 where i WAS the fandom.

of course people were around, here and there. burn notice was an incredibly popular show, but not a Popular Show.

it was one of those that dominated the public eye for a couple dazzling years, fizzled out, and then entirely forgotten.

it has had its resurgence lately. not a “big” one, but a notable one no doubt. and it made me realize,

i have hinged my whole adult (and teenage) identity on this show. being this show’s number one fan. and when it gets down to it, and i see people enjoying the show that i literally have been a walking advertisement for, for the greater part of a decade, its bittersweet.

finally, people listen. but also, i feel a lack of a sense of self.

of course dubbing myself “THE burn notice person” when there was no fandom was egotistical and pointless at best, i never really imagined that identity being challenged.

and, no, obviously nobody is challenging it. that’s silly. it was never a serious title to begin with, but just a joking testament to my dedication and passion for the series. but in a way, it was.

but with the spreading of the show, i realize that being a vessel of transmitting Burn Notice Brainworms is pretty much moot now. like im not needed?

and god it sounds so dumb to say. im so depressed and self-hating but have such an elevated sense of self and worth about the dumbest stuff. it just sounds so (for lack of a better word) narcissistic of me to want to disappear the second im not “important” anymore. so on brand, and i really hate it.

its just all so fucking dumb. i know how dumb it is to feel this way, but i also still feel a sense of grief and loss over something i never had a say over in the first place.

i think part of it is that i wasted all of my teen and young adult years being a hermit, doing nothing but watching the show over, and over, and over, and over, and over, with nothing to show for it. i feel like i have entitlement to it because of that, and thats so fucking dumb. i don’t know why i am that way. i wish i wasnt.

i wish i could just be happy to have people who i share an interest with, but it just makes me want to disappear?

im no stranger to self-sabotage, but something about this feels different than that. i can’t explain it.

i don’t know. i can’t really explain why i feel such a sense of ownership over something i absolutely have no business feeling entitled to.

maybe its one of those “i suffered so everyone else should too” mentalities?

yknow, being bullied by my peers for being weird, or being told to shut up about it by my friends, both online and off, and my parents and family completely tuning me out whenever i spoke. “carrying” the fandom into the 2020’s by being annoying and loud.

i know i didnt DO anything for this fandom. i didn’t carry anything. nothing would be different today whether i was here or not. im owed nothing. people deserve to love the show, i want people to, but i still backslide into feeling like i should just throw in the towel because someone will love it more. someone will do better than me.

maybe thats why i liked competing for the title of “the best” in a ring with no opponents. so i could feel important for once. i know i stand up to no one, in anything i do. my art. my video game scores. my trivia. my money. my collections.

and when that “”title”” is challenged, i feel lost again. not because im in the ring with a bunch of people, but because nobody else is even competing, and yet i still lose. because everyone else is at the bar next door.

im the fool for trying to win at a social setting.

but then, i never really was equipped for socialization anyway. somewhere the wires got crossed.

anyway, i don’t really remember what my point was. i guess im just complaining. nothing new.

im just glad that burn notice has people who care about it.

[ilovechubbieguys]

Chapter 3🍓

-lmk if you guys have any criticism i love criticism as long as its respectful!! Enjoy! Chapter 2 here!

-------------------------🍓-----------------------

"Blake?.."

He turned around with a sour look on his face. I mean god he looked so diffrent i had no clue it was him.

I mean can you blame me! Its been 5 years since high school. Im shocked he recognized me to fast.

Theres no way hes still mad?! He knows i had nothing to do with any of that. Right? I mean ya i was there but iiii didnt do anything. That was all jenny and her boyfriend. I was simply a bystander. Kinda.. not really.

I do feel bad now that i think about it... he didnt deserve that. No one does. God i was such a little bitch in highschool

------------epic flash back memory------------

Jenny: heyy blake

Blake: oh uh hey jenny

Jenny: i wanted to ask you something

Blake: uh ya sure whats up

Jenny: did you have a date to prom yet?

Blake: no, no i dont why

Jenny: oh ok great! You know my friend y/n?

Blake: ya ive seen her around

Jenny: well she was wondering if youd go with her!

Blake: wait really?

Jenny: ya here ill put her number in your phone!

Blake: ok sounds good

--------end of epic flashback memory---------

Long story short it was all a joke. I stood him up at prom just for the fun of it...

I know im an asshole but i couldnt say no to jenny shed ruin me! She was the most powerful girl at school

And ive changed! I could never do somthing lile that to someone now.. i just hope i can make him see that

I walked back to the living room and saw issac was back but blake had left. I dont blame him between his getting yelled at by tanner and being faced with his highschool bully i wouldnt be shocked if he didnt come out till i left.

After a while of talking me and tanner ended up in his room taking turns taking hits from a cart tanner swore was his.

We where talking about everything and everything, you know high thoughts. Suddenly the door bust open "TANNER DO YOU HAVE MY NEW C-" it was blake

He stopped dead in his tracks staring at me, cart in hand mid hit. I froze up not knowing what to do. Was i smoking his cart right now...

I swear im gonna kill tanner.

"Tanner. Is that my cart shes hitting right now."

"Maybe..."

"OMG IM SO SORRY TANNER SAID IT WAS HIS"

"Just keep it i dont want it now that its been anywhere near you"

What. Did he just call me dirty..😧 i looked over at tanner "im gonna kill you."

Some time goes by and i decide i should go apologize to blake and not just for the cart. Tanner told me which room was his and i knock on his door.

*knock knock*

"Blake? Its y/n"

I dont hear a responce so i go in. Hes sitting at his desk playing seige. I take a look around his room. Rugs on the wall? Thats an interesting choice but i liked it.

I asume he didnt hear me so i walk up to his chair and tap his shoulder lightly trying to not scare him.

"Blake?"

He pulls the left side of his headphones off his ear but doesnt turn to you, to focused on the current match hes in.

"Hey blake i just wanted to say im sorry... and not just for the cart. Which i will replace.."

He doesnt say anything but you hear him sigh "ya like id believe that." Fair point

"Im serious blake i dont know why i was such a bitch in highschool you didnt deserve that..." i tried to sound as genuine as possible

"Well you where a bitch and thats that. Now get out"

Oh my god. He is impossible and ya sure im a better person but im still not gonna put up with disrespect "listen blake im trying here ok which is alot better then nothing at all" you say matter of a factly. I notice he had died in his game as his screen lit up red

He stood up from his chair and turned to me "ya hallelujah your a saint, a changed person thats great bye" he got pretty damn close to me for hating me and all

Ill admit him being this close to me made me relize he really was cute... maybe if he didnt hatw my guts hes a nice guy who knows..

But i sure as hell am not giving up this easily.

---------------------------------------------------

GUYS ILL ADMIT THIS CHAPTER WAS NOT THE BEST IM SORRY 😭😭I GOTTA BUILD CONTEXT.

[verdemoun]

can i have more timewarp Javier info? just because im insane about him

Timewarp Javier deserves the world I will never forgive dutch van der linde.

Javier was the only timewarper who immediately burst into tears and started hugging everyone upon seeing the gang. Admittedly, if not for the fact they’d just watched him magically appear in the middle of a market, they might have doubted it was Javier because of how out of character it was and also pictures didn’t do justice to how much Javier had changed.

Not in a fatphobic way but in a what happened to the light in his eyes. How is his hair shorter than they’d ever seen it and yet so dry and ratty with split ends when it had once been something he took pride in. Why has every single year been carved into his face. Compared to Bill, John and even Dutch, Javier just seems old and tired to the 1899 gang.

Being around the gang in a weird way bought back the post-1899 depression and self-doubt back. Javier really took Dutch's 'change' the hardest. He stayed loyal to Dutch only for Dutch to still leave him behind escaping Beaver Hollow. He had been living for survival since then, not for anything he believed in. Had he ever believed in anything? Or had he echoed Dutch's ideals from the moment they met?

Once again, Papa Hosea to the rescue. He knows what it's like to feel like a fool for believing in Dutch - and even if he knew everything he does now, he thinks he would have kept following Dutch with the same blind devotion. Javier was no more a fool than any of them. Every day he wakes up beside his wife he's reminded what a fool he is: he went back to Dutch when Bessie was still alive. He gave up years he could have spent waking up beside her in favor of following Dutch.

Javier also struggled a lot with the sheer concept of timewarp because he's catholic. All the catholic boys (Kieran, Sean and Javier) went through the necessary crisis of 'does this mean God isn't real' because modern era isn't torture enough to be hell but if the closest thing to heaven is a 16" new york pizza then they want their money back.

One of his first regular outings leaving the house was he started going to church again. Kieran and Javier, two gays in the back row having a crisis of faith not for being gay but 'how the fuck did I end up alive 100 years into the future instead of Hell'.

Javier loves instagram. It's like giving a bird a mirror. He will doom-scroll for hours just looking at pretty things and understands the modern era concept of aesthetic long before even the 1899 gang have figured it out. Bessie loves that they've picked up an interior decorator. She has come home to Javier moving furniture around and it just works so much better.

Javier sees Kieran in a skirt once, gets the run down on how the concept of gender and sexuality, and immediately is running to the store because he NEEDS IT. He loves make-up (admittedly just because he is a bit vain and loves hiding his blemishes to Kieran's disgust) and is the crowned prince of hair products. Everyone's getting $80 bottles of shampoo and conditioner for their specific hair type for Christmas.

Because Javier was so depressed after he timewarped Hosea held off bullying him to get a job because he needed time to work through his grief and feelings towards the gang and get back to something he could consider himself again. Most of the gang actually enjoy having jobs and a reason to get out of bed and function but by the time Javier seemed in a good enough place to consider it, Javier was fully committed to the unemployed loser lifestyle and loved it. Bessie is fine with this but swears no more of them living off her paycheck she can only support so many and still have grandbaby spoiling money.

Javier in fact invented the 'can I rizz you up' 'sure' 'PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE' because man knows how to carry himself confidently and act suave but is actually a dork and a loser. This level of manfailure even effects his ability to flirt with Kieran Duffy, an oversized sweater wearing horsegirl who still has hay stuck in his hair. (Kieran in contrast is a clumsy disaster who is fully capable of having someone wrapped around his fingers with an artful pick up line).

Teaching Javier to drive was basically a crash course in Spanish. He doesn't hate driving but he has the worst road rage and will always say insults in Spanish instead. This has backfired many times with how much more common Americans speaking Spanish is in modern era.

Fishing is much more obviously a core part of Javier's personality. He has all the shit fishing caps. Javier and Kieran have fucked in the Bass Pro Shops pyramid. He does have a guitar but sometimes at gang catch ups he will be too busy talking about fishing to remember to play it.

The gang still love listening to Javier play. Javier hadn't played guitar since 1899 and playing again takes them all back to the good days before Blackwater.

Javier, alongside John, are the only ones who won't forgive Dutch. Javier lost too much of himself in his loyalty to Dutch and he won't forgive him for never coming back for him after Beaver Hollow. He won't risk losing the slither of happiness he's found to Dutch's whims again.