#now im just like. man i really wasnt allowed to like anything just for fun huh.

[valtsv]

i'm not blaming anyone because there's literally no way you could know but whenever people say "i'm shocked you aren't already a fan of/aware of this pop culture thing" it always makes me a bit sad because. yeah i guess i probably would have been if i'd been allowed to have interests and casual hobbies that weren't constantly scrutinized and only deemed acceptable if they contributed towards my future academic development as a kid. maybe if i'd been allowed to use a computer or phone without my parents constantly breathing down my neck about what i was using them for and punishing me and further restricting my access to the internet if they caught me seeking out any kind of social or recreational interaction there that wasn't pre-approved and regularly checked to ensure i wasn't saying or doing anything that didn't suit their traditional conservative nuclear family sensibilities (or just, like, having fun in a way they couldn't understand tbh). maybe i would have been able to just like. enjoy things. maybe i would have had friends.

[ppnuggie]

　　　　　　MTMTE x gn reader

　　　　『　rodimus ,, ultra magnus ,, chromedome ,, rewind ,, megatron ,, whirl ,, tailgate ,, swerve ,, cyclonus ,, first aid ,, ratchet ,, drift ,, gender neutral reader 』

　　-> christmas on the lost light

　　— fluff ,, sfw ,, crack

　　— sorry i havent been uploading as much 😭💔 ive been busy with work and school ,, but im on christmas break so hopefully ill be able to get through the few requests i have sitting in my inbox rn and reopen requests :(( ima try to start uploading more now as much as i can ❤️ heres a little something for christmas though ! hope you all enjoy christmas this year <3

• it was natural for the bots aboard to be interested in human customs ,, having lived in a war most their life . death and violence were something they were quite used to experiencing ,, never really having the time to experience anything outside of the horrors of war itself .

• swerve was one of the few main bots that pestered you often about human holidays . cybertronians didn't celebrate much ,, unless they were a group of autobots who just gave some decepticons a what-for .

• then again ,, swerve usually asked many questions regarding things on earth and what humans do . sometimes you humored him ,, sometimes you told little lies ,, like if you clapped three times in a mall it would be a sign that a tiger was loose . it was quite fun to put silly nonsense in that processor of his at times .

• though when it came to christmas he would not leave you alone . whether you celebrated it or not ,, you still explained the custom in general to him . how old saint nicholas would mosey on down the chimney ,, eat the cookies and drink the milk left out for him ,, and leave presents under the tree lit well and adorned with ornaments .

• you even pulled up the santa tracker for swerve ,, showing him where santa would go and be ,, how on christmas eve he would be flying around with his reindeer and leave presents

• hearing all of this intrigued chromedome and rewind ,, as well as tailgate and whirl . cyclonus didn't understand the hype and belief of having an old random man leave gifts in your house and eat your food even if left out specifically him . tailgate was thrilled though ,, a funny little old man leaving him gifts seemed so heavenly to him . chromedome and rewind ,, however ,, had different opinions . rewind was interested in this human holiday ,, whilst chromedome shared the same opinion as cyclonus . how were you sure this 'santa' guy wasnt gonna rob you ? and when you were sleeping nonetheless .

• rodimus already knew of this tradition ,, as did ratchet and ultra magnus . rodimus was quite ecstatic at the idea of having a christmas party ,, watching christmas movies and sipping on energon . maybe he could even have you sit on his lap ,, all cozy in those soft blankets and sippin on your own mug of hot chocolate .

• ratchet couldnt care less ,, grumbling something about how 'you humans and your holidays and customs' . though he definitely didnt deny the offer of going to this christmas party ,, it was nice to spend some time that didn't involve life threatening situations for once .

• ultra magnus ,, on the other hand ,, was quite picky about how the christmas party should be set up . he even tried to ban home alone ,, saying he didnt want rodimus to get any ideas from the traps in the movie . the last thing he needed was to end up in one the next day . though ,, the many outweigh the few ,, and so home alone was allowed in the movie marathon .

• now when you told him about the grinch ,, he wasnt sure if you were mocking him by saying it was an actual movie or if he should be concerned for what this dr.seuss guy was drawing . i mean ,, have you seen how hairy the grinch is ? or how the whos in whoville are shaped ? pointy noses and all ,, it was quite new to magnus .

• megatron ,, who overheard everything ,, already knew he wasnt going to be wanted at the party . it made sense ,, his past and everything he's done to earth and its people . though when you asked him to come ,, that you personally wanted him there ,, he swore he felt his spark stop for a second . he only gave a nod ,, whilst ravage bickered to him that night in his habsuite .

• whirl ,, to say the least ,, was prepared to fight santa . he was watching the santa tracker ,, waiting for the jolly fellow to pop up so whirl could fly down and bring out the big guns ( that brainstorm recently made ,, not yet tested out or put through a test trial so lord knows what may go wrong) . magnus almost had to throw him in the brig if he couldnt contain his sudden rage and fury for the old man .

• first aid was somewhat interested ,, never having celebrated a holiday before . it would be nice ,, getting together and doing nothing but watching movies all day . he hadnt seen movies from earth that much either ,, besides a few fast n furious ones here and there . needless to say ,, he was somewhat concerned for humans need to trash cars . he cringed a little on the inside ,, watching those perfectly good cars blow up . it was like a horror movie but for cybertronians .

• during the movie marathon ,, whirl tried to sneak violent night and black christmas in ,, saying they were also christmas movies and that they should watch them . magnus ended up throwing them out ,, saying no one really felt like seeing dying people during this one time of peace .

• drift enjoyed the nightmare before christmas ,, the claymation alone was enough to captivate him . then the designs of the characters ,, the music and songs ,, even jack's childlike wonder for christmas matched his own (in a few ways) . during that movie you sat with him ,, sharing a few facts about the movie itself . how long it took to make and how hard it is to do claymation movies .

• during the polar express you stayed with rewind and chromedome ,, snuggling in between the two and sippin on your hot chocolate . rewind enjoyed watching the train on the ice whilst chromedome puffed about how he coulda easily done that himself and saved everyone . you only rolled your eyes ,, muttering out a sure as you fought back a smile .

• during a break in between the movies you noticed megatron ,, standing awkwardly in the corner with his own cube of fools energon in servo . you smiled at the bot ,, walking up to him and having a small conversation with him . you didnt honestly think he’d show up ,, but youre glad he did . he let you sit with him during one of the movies ,, bonding well with the giant bot .

• he was quite warm ,, heat coming from off his body as you huddled close to him . he tucked his servo around you ,, worried you may fall off . for a few moments during the movie you swore you saw him smile at some of the corniest parts ,, or chuckle softly at some of the dumbest jokes .

• you took turns ,, switching between bots during different movies . you would sit in their laps ,, explain little things you liked about the movie playing and share a few things of your own childhood during this time of the year .

• it was nice ,, to say the least . having time to the bots ,, doing things that reminded you of home . it wasnt the same ,, but it was the thought that counted . spending time with them peacefully was more than enough for you ,, and definitely more than you could ask for this christmas .

[lalaluvvs]

robot sug pt 2

thanks for all the love lately! im clearly having too much fun writing these...

Suguru doesn't remember when it started, but he knew he was in trouble the second it did.

He felt a pang in his heart- or what mimicked a human heart- and felt fear like he never had before. He began running through all the tests in his software, frantically running every program back to back. They all came back positive, with no sign of anything wrong.

But he felt wrong.

That morning he kept his strange feeling to himself. Not the smartest decision, he would admit, but he'd rather not bother Satoru with useless checks. He would remind him over and over that he was never a problem, but Suguru did not yet have the emotional intelligence to tell whether that were true.

However, as stupid and oblivious as the guy was, Satoru noticed a change within his companion. He forgot to make the bed, and allowed him to throw his clothes around the room. What's worse- he was burning the pancakes.

"Hey." Satoru comes up behind him, soft hand pressed into his shoulder. He's taken aback by the flinch it illicits, and pulls back a second later. "You seem out of it today. Why don't you take the time to recharge?"

Suguru shakes his head, less stiff now than he was just a few months prior. He was learning, and he was learning fast. "No." he sighs. It was eerily human-like. "Im fine. I promise. Just- need to start over."

He tosses out the burnt pancake from the pan and plops more batter onto it, watching it carefully before Satoru notices his eyes grow distant with thought. He doesn't mention it for the time being.

Satoru picks a grape from the fresh bowl of fruits Suguru always left out for him. He was so good at buying the sweet ones. "Nah it's cool. I'll just order some takeout, no biggie."

Suguru glares at him and there's something so irritatingly authoritative in his eyes that he can't stand, something that says "not even an option." He does best with avoidance, so he walks away before he has to hear his speech. He wanders aimlessly through the kitchen, keeping a close eye on Suguru and watching him fail uncharacteristically at making breakfast. It was seriously hard to watch.

He hums, running down to the basement and coming back up with his tools in hand. Suguru only side eyes him, relaxing only when he realizes that it's too early for Satoru's antics. He usually offers a grace period of peace. Usually.

That's until he starts throwing the tools haphazardly around the table. They clatter and thunk, interrupting Suguru's quiet, peaceful morning. To be fair, it wasnt like it was all that quiet in his head anyway.

He creates a small circle of tools right beside him as he sits at the kitchen table, flipped away from the table, staring at Suguru's back until he starts to get the hint.

Suguru does, in fact, get the hint after about thirty seconds. He really did have such a good robot.

"What do you need?" Suguru frowns, arms crossed in front of his chest. He was getting so bold recently, and it made Satoru so proud to see him out of his shell.

"Other than breakfast?" he holds up his tools, grinning ear to ear. ""m gonna fix ya!"

Suguru only looks at him, head cocked to the side.

"Oh don't look at me like that. Come here." He urges Suguru to sit in the chair he pulled right in front of him.

Begrudgingly, the robot moves. More out of a sense of 'I owe this man my life' than obedience. Although, thinking about it, he would follow every single request, no matter how ridiculous. There, again. The pang in his heart. He'd been feeling it off and on, keeping track of when it came, but he still had no answer as to what could've caused it.

He picks his eyes up then, meeting Satoru's lively, blue ones and has to fight the impulse to flinch back at his closeness. God, when did that become a thing?

He feels the pang again. He doesn't consider this pain. No, the opposite. When he looks into his eyes, he feels something like- well like when you finish a new, hefty update. Or when you're given nice things, like clothes and a roof over your head and a pan to make pancakes in the morning. It's the feeling of getting up and taking care of someone, even when they're fully capable of taking care of themselves.

This feeling... it didn't have a name in his mind. It was just familiar, surrounded by all the things he would be afraid to lose. Like his new wardrobe, or his pan for pancakes, or the mornings he spent with Satoru.

He knew what the pang was. He just couldn't bring himself to admit that. Not now, and probably not ever. Satoru would simply not want him anymore, he decided.

So, he sat back and let the young engineer pull all the wires and push all the buttons he needed to.

Satoru would never figure out what his problem was, and figured he would just take a break from working on Suguru for a while. He knew Suguru was aware of something he wasn't, but for some reason he didn't find it important enough to bother him about it. He was like that about everything.

He realized on that day that he held a secret with the power to destroy everything he's been gicen these past few months. He was getting greedy. He wouldn't ask for Satoru to love him. He couldn't. Not when everything about him made him a fraud.

[visionthefox]

I saw a post that read related to tsams “Moon killed Eclipse… and how is Moon better now? Moon killed Eclipse just like Eclipse killed Lunar… Now Moon is the same monster and killer as Eclipse congratulations” do you have any thought about this?

well - is wrong in two ways First - wasnt Sun who actually killed Eclipse tho? with the power of anime and magic? Second - even if - Moon did kill Eclipse - comparing them both is not knowing their past and reasons why thet do what they do.. (this got too long sorry) but in shorty: Eclipse killed Lunar because he felt betrayed - hurt and angry Moon killed Eclipse to put a stop to his evil plans- and maybe fix what his past life stared..

Moon- (for what I know has old Moon memories back- and so the context of what his past life did so far) - Killed Eclipse due to wanting to put a stop to a literal mad-man - and also.. give him a final rest.. this his all on me - but seeying how deep down they are still machines - I cant help to think Eclipse has been stuck in a loop of orders ever since he was left alone and finally had his own bodie lets remember: Creator made Moon for Fazbear to use but put on him a Kill Code so he could "end the Evil Humans" in a twisted justice Both Moon and Eclipse carry this order in their head. Moon did killed people not for "fun" as he let us think- but because he was made to do it- eventually he had to fight back this orders - and that caused him stress - eventually healing from it but also- pretty much ending his first life to be fully free of this code-- (ignore the fact the Code is sentient) Now - as for Eclipse- the whole "I will rule the new world!" that's just.. Creator's way of thinking- and Eclipse is not even aware of it - nor he cant fight it. why? he's doing what he's made to do.. he has no reason to care - unlike Moon - who only did so because Sun was his moral guide.. Eclipse didnt had one until he made Lunar and! allowed Lunar to pretty much be his own person - he let him have a bit of freedom. that lead to Lunar to see how wrong Eclipse was. because unlike Moon - or Eclipse himself - Lunar was made similar to Sun or what Eclipse think of Sun - innocent. stupid- childish - ignorant- he never expected Lunar to learn that much.. so unlike Moon and Sun Eclipse saw Lunar as his right hand - his second - his sidekick - there was clearly some care - why would he play games? or allow Lunar to keep the show? he always mentioned how lunr didnt get it - he clearly didnt expect lunar to do so.. (Eclipse BETRAYED Lunar in VRCHAT - minute 5:40)

it was only when he grew frustated he become more violent- and even so- he showed to feel guilt-

then again.. his code - he always fights back this guilt - since he doesnt "want to be weak" (this is my HC as to why he never was honest) his core- he wasnt even showed any healty was to deal with his issues- not that is was easy- its only fair to assume Eclipse's mind was too broken to even consider "giving up" his "life goals" or what really is - the orders.. again. Im not saying Eclipse is this poor robot who didnt do anything wrong. he is twisted- he is evil . but because he was made this way.. he could have changed? yes - did he wanted to? no - Eclipse killed Lunar because he felt betrayed - hurt and angry Moon killed Eclipse to put a stop to his evil plans- and maybe fix what his past life stared.. that post you saw- maybe was just a new fan who got too into Eclipse .. emotions can make us not see stuffs haha thanks you so so much for your ask and time!! specially if you read me til this point haha

[syrupspinner]

i completed Sable

im gonna compare this to so many other games dude you have no idea

when i first finished the tutorial and drove out into the sand dunes proper, i thought about hyrule field. like pretty much every other gamer born after 1999, i dont see it the same way is was seen when it was released. it was a flex - nintendo bragging about how the n64 can make a wide open field. of course theres nothing to do in it, thatd give them a chance to hide a loading zone or mask pop-in; they werent just a magician showing that there was nothing up their sleeve, they took off their shirt. this is what amazed gamers when they first left kakariko village: the sheer scope.

now its just a big, empty field. with technological advancements, thats seen as a failure in modern world design - what, you mean you couldnt be bothered to put anything here?

sable somehow managed to capture what i can only imagine was the sense of wonder players felt seeing hyrule field, but for a totally different reason. it wasnt a flex of pure technology, it was an exercise in ludonarrative! the way it gets you comfortable with exploring every nook of the ibexii village before showing you a world thats figuratively one hundred times bigger is such a fun way to pull the rug out from the player.

it could have easily been overwhelming in a negative way too, causing an "aw man, ive gotta explore all this?" reaction, but the narrative of sable being able to (instead of having to) explore sets the player up to share this outlook with her. "i get to" turning into "i have to" is the kiss of death for enjoying a game, and i think sable avoids this very well. when i got to the badlands, i didnt think "aw man, i have to climb all these rocks to get to the cartographer" i thought "oh cool, how do i climb these rocks to get to the cartographer?" because i was having fun solving an environmental puzzle.

another comparison i wanna make is to, believe it or not, Fallout. its an open secret that the fallout games are a bit lackluster when it comes to open worlds (I HAVE NOT PLAYED NEW VEGAS), but the originals had a great implementation of subtle directioning and signposting. the most famous example is right at the beginning: between your starting location and your compass's first mark, theres a town, and you need to buy a rope from that town to proceed, and thats how you get wrapped up in a major sidequest and open up a link to the rest of the world. Sable pulls the same trick for me: i was following the compass to the next major village, and i stumbled upon a weird location i couldnt really parse. i could climb a tree and pick up weird smokey seed things, but i couldnt do anything else. when i get to the town, im asked to collect beetle hides for a side quest - and that 'useless' location was called the beetle nest.

while im comparing this to bethesda games, id be remiss if i didnt mention skyrimming. its a phrase i use to describe ramming yourself up a nearly sheer cliffside to see if the physics engine lets you scale it. i did it all the time as a misguided tween playing skyrim for the first time, because i couldnt be bothered finding paths up the mountains. Sable lets you do something similar, but with more intention. the games open world design means it totally accepts you taking unintended routes. i didnt take the easiest route to the badlands village, but i still got there. allowing me to succeed in an unintended way is the mark of a wonderful open world game.

i got to eccria, and full disclosure, i had to crank my graphics settings all the way down. there were too many buildings and npcs for the game to handle. i kept getting lost in the big-ass city, too. when the investigation (side?)quest began i gave up on gathering clues because i straight up couldnt find my way to one of the suspects. i could still finish the quest is the thing, it just ended without any real satisfaction. i think thats great! part of good open-ended design is letting players end without perfectly curated satisfaction.

then i went to the shipyard. was i supposed to be there? thats a silly question to ask about an open world game. anyway, the answer is no, because i spent half an hour trying to climb a mountain for a quest i couldnt finish because i didnt have the right mask. man, this game rules.

man, i havent even talked about the art direction yet. what is there to say? im a sucker for cell shading, and this game leans into it so well! the way the colour palette changes when you go between areas is so cool, like... i cant even put it into words, its just so fun to look at. ive always considered deserts a hard place to make visually interesting, but Sable does such a great job with that

it was at this point that i started aimlessly floating around finishing up sidequests and oddjobs until the endgame. i only started noticing how glitchy the game is at this point. im not holding it against the game at all, because frankly its a miracle that any video game boots to a title screen if you know how programming works (not to say that i do) but its hard not to complain about all the times that things just... didnt load in. sometimes id crash my bike into invisible buildings, sometimes i would just despawn of my bike and have to dismount it to be visible, and one time a chum was invisible. this isnt a skill issue i watched the particles come out of nowhere

in the end, this is a wonderful game. if i had to pick one thing it does best, its the atmosphere. it puts all of its effort into making you feel like a small fish in a big desert, and i really related to my character in the world. also, i dont wanna spoil what masks you get in this game, so ill just say i picked the completionist one with the four-letter name. no its not the fuck mask, dont ask me if theres a fuck mask because im not telling you

[ghostiiess]

[NSB HEADCANONS] - selfcare night

pov: you doing a selfcare night with darren

warnings: none

type: wholesome

member: darren liang (lildarbear)

REBLOGS AND LIKES ARE VERY APPRECIATED!

This man is the king of selfcare

Idk why, but i feel like darren would be the type of guy to buy a lot of skincare products even if he doesnt really need it (me)

I imagine him being like « hey baby! Want to do some skincare with me? I bought some things from target »

(More under the cut!)

Darren would have A LOT of skincare...

This man would have a box with all the face mask he has, all the cream, all the moisturizer…

This man do not miss anything!

Btw, i have found an app... If you don’t really know how to take care of you or what are the right steps for skincare, there’s an app called ‘skin bliss’ who’s super good! it allow you to know what’s your skin type and which products you should use and everything

This is not a collab or something like that, just a little app that i found a while ago and thought it could maybe help some people! (It doesn’t replace the professionals, but it does help a little bit!)

ANYWAYS!

Darren would be super happy to help you out

"Want to do your skincare with me? Alright, baby!"

« Do you know your skin type? »

« no? alright, so there’s normal one, the oily one, the dry one, the sensitive and the mixed one who’s mixed with the dry and the oil skin type »

Idk why, but from all the boys, i feel like Darren is the most ‘skincare’ lover?

Like, i know the others guys love their routine and everything, but i feel like dar’ would be the one who like it the most?

Since you aren’t exactly sure what’s your skin type, liang bought you ‘all-skin’ skincare

«  you can all use these!"

"hey no need to pay me back.... unless...😏😏😏"

"WHAT???? i didnt say anything, i wasnt even thinking about that!!!"

He would show you the steps and how to apply the products, the creams, and basically everything you need to know about skincare

« First, you have to clean your face, because why are you doing your skincare if your face isn’t even clean? »

« yes! just like that, baby! now, you have to drh it up a little bit »

« then, you apply this cream! »

He would give you all the tips and all the informations you need to make your skin glow

He would tell you everything you need to know, every steps you need to do before adding something else on your face

Of course, skincare night isn’t really skincare night if we don’t do silly face mask at the end

« I only bought sheet face mask, because the Pell-off ones are not good for your skin. They scratch all the protection base you have »

Why am i imagining Darren bought sheet animal face mask for you?

« Look how cute it is, baby!! It’s almost as cute as you! »

« gosh, you’re so cute with the mask on »

Lildarbear would kiss you

Yes, even if you both have a face mask on

« What? I ain’t even doing something wrong! »

« Wdym I’m kissing you? Ofc, im kissing you, you’re my girl »

"It won't turn into a makeout session... i'm telling you"

we know how Darren is

This man cannot let his hands for himself

« I am just checking if the moisturizer lip balm is working… »

« i don’t know if it’s working, i may need to verify again »

THIS MAN’S SO FLIRTY

After the face mask, he would literally put cream on his hand and moisturize you again

« that way, your skin will now be more hydrated »

« You did a good job, baby »

« So proud of you! »

« Wdym i only wanted to make out with you? Miss, i was checking if your lips were enough hydrated or if you needed more, this was for pure scientific experience, nothing more »

A selfcare night with Darren seems like a dream to me

It sounds so relaxing and so fun

Darren, tell us how you do your skincare, because your skin is amazing and so glowy, like wow

Taglist! (Open! Send an ask if you’d like to be in it!) : @nsb-rkive @kentisbaby @firebenderwolf @hyuneee0 @yawnzzznnn @ghostyycat7

Bold can’t be tagged.

[acaciapines]

What's your favorite relationship in the au? Or if that's too broad, top five relationships?

he he im taking top five lol. these are. somewhat in An Order but also not really dont think about it.

Luz and Mari: like, come on. i have to do luz and her daemon!! when i first sat down to start writing this fic and figured out what exactly was going to be the driving relationship at the core of the fic...it was the two of them. the owl house itself is so much about luz and coming to terms with who she is and how she GOOD and amazing even if what she wants and does isnt like, society-typical, and being able to externalize that between these two has been so so so fun.

King and The Collector: i wasnt supposed to love them so much help. but...man, i have fallen in LOVE with the relationship between these two, and how absolutely messy and complicated it is. they care about each other so much. the collector doesnt know how to show that. king doesnt know how he can after everything the collector has done. they are both so good and important to me

Luz and Hunter: okay. look. of course they were going to end up on here. what is there even to say about them? they go through so much together and come out the other side and dont really know who they are anymore, just that if they didnt have the other, they would, 100%, be dead. and thats...certainly a thing to hold.

The Collector and Firefly: firefly sees a sad child and says is anybody going to adopt that. and doesnt even wait for an answer. but being serious its so much fun to write firefly and the collector and their attempts to understand each other--firefly understands the collector in a way king cant because shes gone through something similar, and she very much sees a kindred spirit in the collector even if they dont know what that is yet.

Luz and Eda: thats her mom...thats her daughter...writing all the fumbles as eda attempts to be a good parent for luz and has to stumble through learning about humans, and luzmari trying to be a good daughter when theyre scared it means replacing camila, even though family doesnt work like that...oh its so GOOD its so FUN i LOVE THEM.

and of course, some of the many honorable mentions:

luz and amity! (teaching each other to be happy and live and be themselves and luz is only able to be herself bc of amity and amity is only able to be herself bc of luz and they were each the thing that allowed the other to finally stop repressing Their Respective Issues....girlfriends of all time....)

willow and gus and amity! (the layers to their friendships is everything okay. the messy broken friendship of willow and amity. gus befriending amity with none of that baggage and willow feeling hurt still but not wanting to ruin gus's friendships and amity not knowing how to make things better so she just pretends it never happened ITS SO FUN WHEN I FOCUS ON THEM--)

eda and firefly! (learning to co-parent with your owl curse is actually the funniest thing in the world)

amity, edric, and emira! (they are in no way a huge focus but i LOVE amity being a bitey baby sibling okay. no holds barred she WILL beat her siblings at literally anything. she will go for the kill w no prompting and its DELIGHTFUL)

firefly and raine! (firefly is SO salty that raine broke up with eda okay. shes so so offended on eda's behalf. but its okay they work it out and now raine has. two girlfriends? and one is an owl. this is fine)

katya, amber, and derwin! (the bats are so so silly and so so stupid and giving them a pov was the best choice i ever made actually)

[lostacelonnie]

Sorry this took a bit to get to time slipped right by & life happened a bit. Plus i got my first tattoo & thus couldn't use my right arm as well for a bit. Weather here has been like. Back & forth between rain/snow & mostly sunny so i can only blame the horrors. Oh good! Im glad its mostly easy stuff for you this month. Wait what? Thats all wild & im glad those teachers got fired for that. If only we were that regulatory of teachers in the states. A win win situation indeed. A carnival? That does sound like a lot of fun i gotta add that on my list of stuff to hopefully see one day. Yeah honestly! Like something about schools just. Is way different & can only be explained by school air. Thank you! I got sparkle decently quick which i needed her for her buffs so im glad. Those 30 free pulls from the anniversary will help my archeron gain i hope. Shame jingliu is in the same patch so ill have to wait for her again. One day clara will come to me. I hoped it would be on sparkle's banner but i got e1 gepard instead. I cant even reach gold & gears because the final boss of swarm disaster is still beating my ass i need better imaginary units. Or to work on ratio maybe he can deal with that damn boss duplicating itself. Oh talents are another thing i should focus on maxing for characters i just. Keep forgetting. Next patch we have triple drop coc & su planar ornaments which is gonna be nuts i cant wait to farm then. Ive played wendy's arc a bit more & like. Wow cocolia is awful what the hell. Worst mom of the year. Im excited for you to continue them both are so good. Oh thats what all that was about okay. Seele best girl always. Oh no worries take all the time you need to jot it down. Yeah some people get. Real intense about their us patriotism & its. Embarrassing. My condolences on losing such an impressive noita run. One day ill get into honkai part 2. But for now its a slow movement through part 1

ah very fair and apologies on my part as well!!! yknow how it is. same old same old. i was personally also Quite busy with our dear beloved school festival which drained me for like a solid week 😭😭 but it was SO worth it. im def helping with it next year as well. AND YOO TATTOO??? THATS AWESOME....... man i wanna get tattoos when im older (and piercings. i dont have a Single one i feel inferior to like all of my friends) but ive never really known what Of. and yeah same with the weather..... it was like. 9 celsius like two days ago and its 25 celsius today. Wild. and thankies!!! i Got Through it (with varying results tbh) but not anything to get me really down so we chillen. AND YEAH RIGHT???? our school is just generally a hotspot for strange individuals (both students and teachers) but its usually in the positive way. but ah what can you do. and yeahhhhh i heard it kinda sucks in the us. and same!!! ive heard a Lot of things about the carnivals in spain since theyre a pretty Big Thing and our teachers love to tell us about them so i actually ended up looking quite a bit forward to seeing one someday. if money allows for it, that is. AND GOD FOR REAL. school air my beloathed school air. OH CONGRATS ON THE SPARKLE!!! to be fully honest i do Not know what her kit is because i wasnt playing That much when her banner was up. or rather focused more on just going through penacony, both story- and exploration-wise. AND GOOD LUCK ON ACHERON!! i managed to get her, her lightcone, AND claras eidolon in like. a 100 pulls which is probs a new record for me. currently saving but i dont know who for yet SHJD. ill see if any future penacony chars interest me (ive been Thinking about boothill, or aventurine for clara) but if not then its gonna be either jingliu or topaz. and ahh good luck with getting them as well in the future!! GOD I HATE THE SWARM. I HATE THE SWARM SO MUCH. GAHHH. the most annoying enemies in the game by a MILE. but ah what can you do. oh yeah very real i always forget in genshin but luckily dont really have that problem in hsr. and yeah im Waiting for that triple drops for my acheron since rn she just has. Very scuffed temporary gear. but not gonna lie her damage is pretty good regardless. i think the mechanic with not needing energy to use her ult but stacks of That One Thing instead is very fun and interesting. brings a bit of spice into the gameplay. AND AHHH I HAVE VERY COMPLEX FEELINGS ABOUT COCOLIA shes a really interesting character imo. but thats revealed a bit more in the later arcs so i wont share too much hehehehe. tho yeah i agree she is Not a great mother. SEELE BEST GIRL ALWAYS!!!! and thankies!!! also yeah... but at least theres a lot of ways one can make fun of them. i literally cant stop saying "MY PRONOUNS ARE U/S/A" whenever i get a good mark on my english tests its just embedded in my vocab now. and have fun with honkai!!!!

[pesterloglog]

Tavros Nitram, Jade Harley, Vriska Serket

Act 5, page 3049-3066

-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling gardenGnostic [GG] --

AT: hEEEY, jADE,

GG: oh hi!

GG: i remember you, you talked to me a lot in my dreams

AT: yEAH, bUT NOW i'M TALKING TO YOU BEING AWAKE,

AT: bECAUSE,

AT: yOUR ROBOT CAN'T TYPE,

AT: bECAUSE IT HAD AN EXPLOSION,

GG: yup!

GG: thats because my dream self died

GG: pretty catastrophically!

AT: aW, nO, i'M DEFINITELY PRETTY SORRY TO HEAR THAT,

GG: thanks, but i think im ok

GG: i felt pretty shaken up at first though

AT: yES, i DID TOO,

AT: i SPENT SO LONG SLEEPING AND DREAMING AND PLAYING ON PROSPIT,

AT: tHAT BEING AWAKE WAS MADE TO FEEL WEIRD, aND i DIDN'T LIKE IT FOR A WHILE,

GG: yeah i have done a lot of sleeping myself :)

AT: oH, yES, i KNOW, bUT,

AT: i SAW YOU, yOU WERE AWAKE A LOT TOO,

AT: aFTER A CERTAIN MOMENT, i SPENT JUST ABOUT EVERY WAKING HOUR BEING ASLEEP,

GG: wow why did you sleep so much???

AT: iT WAS JUST A BETTER WAY TO BE, mORE PEACEFUL AND FUN AND,

AT: i GUESS,

AT: tHERE WAS SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED THAT WAS INCREDIBLY TERRIBLE,

AT: aND SAD,

AT: aND MADE ME FEEL TERRIBLE AND SAD AND SLEEPY, sO i SLEPT, a LOT,

GG: oh no what happened that was so terrible?

AT: i'D PREFER,

AT: tHAT THE THING i WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT NOT TURN INTO THAT TOPIC,

GG: ok sorry for prying!

GG: what did you want to talk about?

AT: i WANTED TO ASK YOU PERMISSION,

AT: i WOULD HAVE ASKED PERMISSION THE FIRST TIME,

AT: bUT AT THE TIME YOU WERE NOT ABLE TO GIVE IT, oR TALK OR ANYTHING,

GG: permission for what?

AT: tO COMMUNE WITH YOUR LUSUS,

GG: with bec?

GG: uh....

GG: what do you mean by commune?

GG: and

GG: what do you mean the first time!

GG: you did it before?

AT: yEAH,

AT: iT MEANS TO TALK TO HIM, aND, sUGGEST HE DO SOMETHING WHICH IS GOOD,

AT: fOR HIM, aND ALSO FOR PEOPLE HE LIKES,

GG: ohhh

GG: like a psychic power??

AT: yES,

GG: pretty sweet!

GG: when did you do it before?

AT: oH, vERY RECENTLY, pERSONALLY SPEAKING,

AT: bUT FOR YOU IT WAS VERY LONG AGO,

AT: aND, iT WAS A REALLY GOOD EXAMPLE i THINK,

AT: oF EXACTLY WHY WIGGLERS SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO DUAL WIELD FLINTLOCK PISTOLS,

GG: hehe what?

AT: sO, i DID THE LIBERTY OF COMMUNING WITH YOUR LUSUS,

AT: wHICH i HOPE WASN'T OUT OF LINE,

AT: bUT LIKE i SAID, yOU WERE UNAVAILABLE,

AT: uHHH,

AT: bY WHICH i MEAN, uNAVAILABLY SMALL,

AT: sO THEN i COMMUNED HIM TO USE HIS AMAZING POWERS, tO,

AT: iNTERVENE,

AT: aND REROUTE THE PROJECTILE AWAY FROM THE PATH THAT WOULD HAVE HARMED YOU,

AT: aND ALSO,

AT: aS A WONDERFUL BONUS AND COINCIDENCE,

AT: iT HAPPENED THERE WAS A FELON ON YOUR PROPERTY,

AT: iT WAS i THINK SURELY AN AGING ROGUE WHO WAS VERY MUCH KEEN ON INTRUDING BETWEEN YOUR REALLY NICE LOOKING FAMILY,

AT: aND AS FORTUNE WOULD HAVE IT,

AT: tHE SMALL MISSILE WAS REDIRECTED INTO THE SENIOR INTERLOPER'S CHEST,

AT: aND HE DIED,

AT: }:)

GG: omg......

GG: that wasnt a senior interloper, im pretty sure youre talking about my grandpa!!!

AT: oH,

GG: and if im interpreting correctly....

GG: youre saying you used bec to make me shoot him???

GG: augh thats so awful!

AT: uHH,

AT: wHAT'S,

AT: a GRANDPA,

GG: oh boy

GG: ok it is basically an old man, who serves the same role as i guess a lusus does on your planet?

GG: he was like my dad, he took care of me!

AT: wHOA,

AT: tHAT IS A REALLY WEIRD CULTURAL THING, i GUESS,

GG: sigh...

AT: sORRY THEN,

AT: aBOUT,

AT: mY CULTURAL IGNORANCE,

GG: well im not blaming you or anything

GG: it sounds like you were just trying to help

GG: and you did save my life

GG: but......

GG: i mean jeeeez

GG: talk about a misunderstanding

AT: wELL,

AT: nOW i FEEL VERY STUPID,

AT: bUT,

AT: i DON'T THINK i WILL GIVE INTO BAD SELF ESTEEM THIS TIME ABOUT THIS,

AT: iT'S IMPORTANT TO STAY CONFIDENT ABOUT STUFF, DON'T YOU AGREE,

GG: uh

GG: sure?

AT: aND i THINK THIS IS A GOOD OPPORTUNITY FOR US TO BOND, aND BECOME CLOSER IN AN EMOTIONAL WAY,

AT: pROBABLY,

GG: .... it is?

AT: oH YES, sEE THE FUNNY THING IS, i ALSO KILLED MY LUSUS BY ACCIDENT,

AT: i MEAN, mY LUSUS THAT WAS A LITTLE FAIRY BULL, nOT AN OLD MAN WITH A HUGE GUN,

GG: oh nooo

GG: how did that happen?

AT: i MURDERED HIM INAPPROPRIATELY WITH A FOUR WHEEL DEVICE,

GG: :|

GG: ummm what kind of device?

AT: lIKE, tHE KIND BASICALLY FOR CRIPPLES TO SIT IN, aND ROLL AROUND,

GG: oh you mean a wheelchair!

AT: i GUESS, tHAT'S A WAY TO CALL IT,

GG: how...

GG: did that happen?

AT: wELL,

AT: i WAS SITTING IN IT, bEING CRIPPLED LIKE USUAL,

AT: aND HE GOT UNDER THE WHEEL IN HIS NAP,

GG: D:

GG: im so sorry

GG: um also

GG: i didnt realize you were paralyzed

GG: not that im saying sorry for that! that would be rude i think

GG: i am just saying sorry for your loss

AT: oH, iT'S OKAY, oN BOTH THINGS,

AT: hE CAME BACK TO LIFE FOR A WHILE, aND COULD TALK, AND THAT WAS FUN,

AT: aND ALSO,

AT: i'M NOT PARALYZED ANYMORE, }:)

GG: oh?

AT: nO, i HAVE ROBOT LEGS, aND i FEEL GREAT, aND i CAN WALK,

GG: wow nice!

AT: oH YES, iT IS TRULY NICE,

AT: i AM A NEW AND DIFFERENT GUY, mOSTLY,

AT: bEING NOT PHYSICALLY HANDICAPPED IS MOST CERTAINLY THE KEY TO HAVING HIGH SELF ESTEEM,

GG: um

GG: that.....

GG: i dont know if i agree with that!

AT: oH ABSOLUTELY, tAKE IT FROM ME AS WHAT FACT IS TRUE,

AT: aND NOW, i FEEL EMBOLDENED TO DO BOLD THINGS THAT HEROES SHOULD DO,

AT: lIKE, sAVE THE LIFE OF A PRETTY GIRL, AND KILL THE FIENDISH OLD MAN, wHO,

AT: wHOOPS, wASN'T FIENDISH, aND YOU LOVED HIM, sORRY,

GG: well

GG: thats good i guess

GG: i just wish...

GG: maybe you'd told me what happened when i was younger?

GG: i spent years wondering about it!

GG: when i was REALLY young, i was sure the doll sitting across from him did it

GG: and for a long time i was terrified of the evil blue girl!!!

GG: she sort of haunted my childhood and i had trouble sleeping for a long time

GG: but of course i got older and realized that was silly, but then i just speculated that maybe it was suicide

GG: which was just a really sad thing to think about!!!

AT: wOW, yEAH,

AT: i,

AT: tOTALLY BLEW THAT THEN,

AT: i GUESS i COULD STILL TELL YOU ABOUT IT IN YOUR PAST,

GG: buuuut...

GG: even if you do, i dont remember you doing so!

AT: oH,

AT: tHEN i GUESS I WON'T,

GG: er

GG: ok :\

AT: bUT YEAH, iRREGARDLESS,

AT: tHIS IS LIKELY TO BE EXACTLY THE KIND OF THING NOT TO STAND IN THE WAY ABOUT GOOD FEELINGS ABOUT MYSELF,

GG: .......

AT: i MEAN, i SAW THAT YOUR LUSUS SAVED YOU ANYWAY, iN ADVANCE,

AT: aND,

AT: i JUST WANTED,

AT: tO MAKE IT POSSIBLE SO THAT i WAS THE ONE INVOLVED WITH BEING THE HERO THERE,

AT: tO SAVE YOU,

AT: lIKE, tO PUT MYSELF IN YOUR STORY, iN A BRAVE CAPACITY, bECAUSE,

AT: tHAT'S WHAT FEELING GOOD AND POSITIVE ABOUT YOURSELF IS ALL ABOUT,

GG: woooooow...

GG: you sound really confused to me!

AT: aBSOLUTELY, i AM CONFUSED LIKE A FOX,

AT: tHE KIND THAT HAS HIGH SELF ESTEEM,

GG: heheheh

GG: youre incredibly silly

GG: i cant really tell to what extent youre joking around here!

AT: i UNDERSTAND THAT, aND JOKES HAPPEN, yES,

AT: bUT FEELING GREAT ABOUT YOURSELF IS NOT A JOKING ISSUE,

AT: iT IS HEAVY DUTY BUSINESS, aND NEEDS TO BE GIVEN ALL THE SERIOUSNESS THAT SAD THINGS GET,

AT: i'VE LEARNED THAT, fROM MY FRIENDS, AND ALSO, FROM RUFIO,

GG: rufio?

AT: yES, hE'S A FAKE,

GG: what do you mean fake?

AT: a FAKE GUY i MADE UP IMAGINARILY,

AT: hE NEVER STOPS BEING A THING THAT'S NOT REAL,

GG: ohh like an imaginary friend....

GG: heh, ok

AT: i'M PRETENDING THAT BEING FULLY HONEST ABOUT RUFIO'S FAKENESS, AND,

AT: bEING UP FRONT ABOUT HIS GENERAL FRAUDULENCE, tHAT IT WILL ONLY GIVE ME EXTRA CONFIDENCE,

AT: i'M PRETENDING THAT AS HARD AS i CAN, iN THE MOST CONFIDENT WAY,

AT: wHICH MAKES IT PARTIALLY MORE TRUE,

GG: that

GG: sure is a philosophy you have there!

AT: yES, bEING CONFIDENT IS ALWAYS ABOUT SAYING AND DOING THE THINGS YOU FEEL,

AT: eVEN IF THE AFRAID PART OF YOU SAYS, nO, pLEASE DON'T DO THAT,

AT: lIKE, uHHHHHHH,

AT: hERE IS A THING i'M AFRAID TO SAY TO YOU, jADE,

AT: bUT,

AT: i'M TOO CONFIDENT NOW TO LET MY AFRAIDNESS MAKE ME FEEL TERRIBLE,

GG: oh??

GG: well, what is it?

AT: rEMEMBER, i TALKED TO YOU A LOT WHEN YOU WERE SLEEPING,

GG: yes

AT: uHH, aND,

AT: wE TALKED ABOUT LOTS OF THINGS, aND WE HAD SOME THINGS IN COMMON, aND IT WAS NICE,

GG: sure!

AT: aND i THINK CONSEQUENTLY, tHE EMOTIONAL RESULT IS PROBABLY,

AT: tHAT MAYBE i HAVE SOME POSSIBLE RED FEELINGS FOR YOU,

GG: red feelings?

GG: you mean

GG: whoooooaaaaaa

GG: wait

GG: really? :o

AT: wOW, tHAT SURE WAS A HARD THING TO SAY AND MADE ME INCREDIBLY NERVOUS,

AT: bUT i SAID IT BECAUSE OF MY REMARKABLE LEG-POWERED SELF CONFIDENCE,

AT: aND NOW i THINK ALL THAT'S LEFT IS DEFINITELY YOUR RECIPROCATION ABOUT THAT, pROBABLY,

GG: um.................

GG: well

GG: i dont think i can reciprocate!

AT: uH OH,

GG: i mean

GG: youre nice

GG: but i dont really know you...

GG: i dont even know your name!

AT: oH GOSH, hOW STUPID CAN i BE,

AT: i FORGOT TO SAY,

AT: i'M TAVROS,

GG: ok tavros

GG: i dont know if youve fully thought about this!

GG: you dont actually know me very well either

AT: oH YES, i SURELY DO,

AT: bECAUSE WE HAD A NUMBER OF SPIRITED CONVERSATIONS, wHEREIN YOU WERE VERY NICE AND PLEASED TO SPEAK WITH ME,

AT: dID,

AT: i MISINTERPRET THAT, wAS IT NOT ACTUALLY NICENESS,

GG: well no

GG: i was being nice

GG: because

GG: i like to be nice to people when i can, and when they are nice to me

GG: but......

GG: things are a little more complicated than that, you cant know someone just by a few conversations!

GG: i mean, i only talked to you when i was asleep! i am kind of different when im dreaming...

GG: i forget things, and at times im not totally sure whats real

GG: dont you remember thats what its like to dream on prospit?

AT: uH,

AT: kIND OF,

GG: sorry, i feel bad about having to disappoint you...

GG: but i dont know what else to say

AT: bUT WHAT ABOUT,

AT: mY ATTRACTIVE BRAVADO,

AT: aND IGNORING MY INSTINCTUAL COWARDICE HARD ENOUGH TO SAY THAT i LIKE YOU,

AT: iSN'T THAT,

AT: sUPPOSED TO BE VERY ATTRACTIVE, aND ENCOURAGE THE MAJOR HAVING OF FLUSHED FEELINGS IN OTHERS,

AT: i GUESS WHAT i MEAN IS, wHAT ABOUT ALL MY CONFIDENCE,

AT: wHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT,

GG: jeeeeeez, um...

GG: tavros i am really flattered you like me and all

GG: and that sure is confident of you to say so! and thats great buuuut...

GG: i guess confidence is one thing but there is such a thing as being toooo forward i guess?

AT: wOW,

AT: oK,

GG: i aaaalso think...

GG: and really this is just polite friendly advice!

GG: that if youre really confident you dont always have to say it all the time

GG: it...

GG: oh man im sorry to say

GG: it just comes of as a little insecure and off putting and kind of defeats the purpose!

GG: and all things considered i think we should just stay friends

GG: or really........

GG: continue building a friendship in the first place, since like i said we dont actually know each other that well!

AT: yEAH,

AT: uUUUUUUHHH,

GG: sorry :C

AT: nO, nO, iF i'M BEING REALISTIC i THINK THAT'S WHAT'S REASONABLE TO SAY TO ME,

AT: aND i'LL WORK ON TONING DOWN MY SELF RESPECT A LITTLE,

GG: aaaah no! you should have self respect

GG: just...

GG: oh boy this is frustrating

GG: can we talk about this later?

GG: i have some things to do!

GG: why dont we get back to the original point

GG: why do you want to commune with bec again?

AT: yES, oF COURSE,

AT: i WANTED TO GET APPROVAL FROM YOU, tO COMMUNE HIM AGAIN,

AT: nOW THAT HE'S A SPRITE,

AT: tO PERPETRATE ONE OF MY HEROIC IDEAS AGAIN,

GG: uh-ohhh

GG: what is your idea this time?

AT: i WILL SUGGEST TO HIM THAT HE ATTACK YOUR ADVERSARY,

AT: aS WELL AS OURS,

AT: aND MAYBE BEAT HIM, tO SOLVE EVERYBODY'S PROBLEMS,

GG: wow, i dunno about that!

AT: bUT i HAVE GREAT SKILL IN COMMANDING BEASTS TO GLORY IN BATTLE,

AT: aND YOURS IS SURELY THE STRONGEST BEAST I'VE SEEN!

GG: but hes my best friend!!!

GG: and you have already managed to get one of my family members killed

AT: bUT ACCORDING TO MY SELF CONFIDENCE, i THINK i'M PRETTY SURE i CAN USE HIS POWER TO BE SUCCESSFUL,

AT: wHOOPS, PRETEND i DIDN'T MENTION MY SELF CONFIDENCE, oR SAY ANYTHING OFF PUTTING,

GG: but all of our adversaries have inherited his powers!

GG: i would imagine the strongest guy would have all of his powers, and then some!!!

GG: i am really not comfortable with this

AT: oH,

GG: you said you are asking me permission first and i appreciate that

GG: but if you are asking im afraid my answer is no!

AT: oKAY, i RESPECT THAT,

AT: bUT, i WONDER,

GG: what?

AT: i WONDER IF A TRULY SELF CONFIDENT GUY, wITH THE BEST SELF ESTEEM THERE IS, wOULD EVEN NEED TO ASK,

AT: mAYBE THE BEST GUY WOULD JUST KNOW HE WOULD BE SUCCESSFUL, aND WOULD DO IT ANYWAY BECAUSE IT IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD, aND EVERYONE ELSE'S,

GG: no way!

GG: that would be smug and arrogant and would make you a bully!!!

GG: later if my friends and i want to ask bec for help and decide thats our best hope, then thats our business

GG: until then, just please stop meddling!!!!!!

AT: wOW, oK,

AT: yOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT ALL THAT, i'LL RESPECT YOUR WISHES,

AT: oR,

AT: wILL i? };)

GG: nooooooooo dont dont dont dont dont

GG: im serious

GG: uuuuggghh i think my headache is coming back

AT: i WAS jUST,

AT: mAKING A JOKE,

AT: sORRY, }:(

AT: i GUESS US BECOMING A FRIENDSHIP DOESN'T HAVE TO HAPPEN NOW,

GG: no...

GG: its fine

GG: i just really dont want you to do that ok?

AT: yEAH,

GG: i have to go now

GG: bye tavros

-- gardenGnostic [GG] ceased being trolled by adiosToreador [AT] --

arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling adiosToreador [AT]

AG: Aaaaaaaahahahahahahahaha!

AG: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

AG: Oh my god, I cannot 8elieve how hilariously pathetic that whole exchange was.

AG: Even 8y your wretched standards, Toreadork!

AG: Hahahahahahahaha, oh god I can't 8reathe!!!!!!!!

AG: A8solutely priceless. XXXXD

AT: hEY, vRISKA,

AT: tHAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A PRIVATE CORRESPONDENCE, oF A PERSONAL NATURE,

AT: hOW COULD YOU EVEN BE READING THAT,

AG: Pff. Tavros, sometimes your stupidity surprises even me.

AG: Next time you decide to open your heart to an alien girl........

AG: Make sure her chat client isn't 8eing holographically projected for all to see, ok?

AT: uH,

AT: wHOOOPS,

AG: It was so em8arrassing just reading that Tavros. I'm em8arrassed!

AG: I am actually feeling genuine em8arrassment. Your o8scene incompetence is actually polluting my otherwise pristine composure. Nice going!

AT: sO,

AT: i DON'T CARE,

AG: Jade let you down too easy. She's too nice! Someone's got to tear into you for that appalling display, and once again, guess who's shoulders that falls on?

AG: That's right. Vriska's, as usual.

AT: i THINK SHE HAS THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF NICENESS, pERSONALLY,

AT: aN AMOUNT THAT IS SOME, iNSTEAD OF,

AT: nONE,

AG: Hey, I'm nice when it matters, and where it doesn't strangul8te the critical development of people I give a shit a8out, ok?

AG: Really I don't know what you see in her. She is completely useless, like you.

AG: W8, of course!!!!!!!! It makes perfect sense. You and she represent the ideal matespritship, how could I have 8een so 8lind!

AG: Two perfectly pointless gru8s in a bucket.

AT: nO, i HAVE TOO MUCH SELF CONFIDENCE NOW TO BE UPSET BY YOUR SCANDALOUS IMAGERY,

AT: i DON'T THINK SHE IS USELESS,

AT: aND i DON'T THINK i AM EITHER,

AT: bECAUSE OF NEW SELF ESTEEMS OBTAINED, rEMEMBER,

AG: Oh will you please stop going on a8out your fucking self esteem.

AG: I will say this much a8out her, she was right a8out that. How insuffera8le can you get, prattling on and on a8out how confident you are.

AG: Tavros, you give confidence a 8ad name. I gave you all the chances in the world to earn it, to earn REAL confidence, and you failed.

AG: You couldn't even do the one little thing I asked you to! The one thing that would have made you man up once and for all.

AG: So instead you flew away and cried, and decided to sleep away your sorrow for the rest of the adventure.

AG: Do you have any idea how sick that made me? Everything a8out you makes me sick.

AG: When you talk a8out your self confidence, I throw up a little. You don't know what confidence is. Ro8o-legs don't give you confidence, that 8n't no more true than saying my ro8o-arm gave me mine. See what I mean?

AG: Your confidence is faker than even the great Rufio himself, Lord of the Unreal. It's pure fiction, a false fakey fraudy con jo8 from a wimpy loser charlatan 8ullshit artist.

AG: It's shallow and nause8ting, just like you. Do us all a favor and SHUT UP a8out it.

AT: oK, i THINK,

AT: tHIS IS ACTUALLY MAKING ME PRETTY MAD,

AG: Yeah right!!!!!!!!

AG: I'll 8elieve that when I see it, chump.

AT: i DON'T WANT YOU TO MOCK ME ANYMORE,

AT: i DON'T KNOW IF MY CONFIDENCE IS REAL, oR WHAT,

AT: bUT i WOULD LIKE YOU TO STOP SAYING STUFF LIKE THAT TO ME,

AT: aND TO STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT MY FRIEND JADE, tOO,

AG: Jade is an idiot.

AG: A useless, 8oring no8ody. What has she done for her party other than fuck up every step of the way? What does she ever do 8ut take naps and get in trou8le?

AG: She's awful, and you deserve each other. Oh w8, except she h8tes you!!!!!!!! Ahahahahahahahaha. Even the 8oring pointless girl h8s you, talk a8out a guy who can't get a 8r8k.

AG: Though I guess she's not compleeeeeeeetely useless. ::::)

AT: wHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT,

AG: Ok, Tavros, I gave her credit for something, so I'll give you credit for something too.

AG: Your plan to control her lusus really wasn't a 8ad idea!

AG: And using your a8ility to "save her life" (lol) was a pretty good way to test how effective your powers are across sessions.

AG: Pretty good way to practice, to know where you stand!

AG: Practicing your a8ilities is important, so when it comes down to using them for something that really matters, you know you're ready for prime time.

AG: I know this first hand.

AG: I got lots and lots and LOTS of practice with your little guinea pig friend. ::::D

AG: So really, turns out she wasn't so useless at all! Far from it.

AT: wHOA, wHAT,

AT: aRE YOU SAYING YOU DID TO HER,

AG: Not really the point!

AG: The point is I'm trying to pay you a compliment.

AG: At this point, you are so sad and disgusting, you should treat anything nice anyone has to say a8out you like a chest full of shimmering 8oon8ucks.

AT: oKAAAY, gOD,

AT: wHAT,

AG: Like I said! Your plan was solid.

AG: Controlling the guardian to go after Jack was a fine idea. Sure would stir some shit up! 8etter than 8eing an insignificant stuttering piece of trash all the time, I say.

AG: And you were definitely on to something a8out doing it "irregardless" (lol) of her wishes.

AG: 8ecause it's for her own good! That's what winners do. They do what is right for someone they care a8out even if the other person does nothing 8ut 8itch and moan and act ungr8ful a8out it. 8etter you learned l8 than never.

AG: In fact, I would go as far as saying that if you went ahead with her plan against her wishes, it MIGHT just earn you a smidgen of respect from me.

AG: We'll see.

AG: There's really just one catch.

AT: oH,

AT: wHAT'S THAT,

AG: The catch is it's not going to work!

AT: wHAT ISN'T,

AG: Are you even listening to me? Man, clear the Rufio wax out of your ears.

AG: You couldn't sic the guardian on Noir even if you were inclined. Not even if I were to MAKE you inclined! :::;)

AT: uHH,

AT: wHY,

AG: 8ecause you are dealing with a pro here. I already thought of that.

AG: I thought of everything!

AG: The guardian is not going to attack the agents who engineered him in the first place.

AG: Or who I should say were "encouraged" (lol) to engineer him.

AG: I was striking a mutually 8eneficial arrangement! This is often the most effective way to manipul8 others.

AG: I just sort of gave them an idea. Nudged them along in the direction of seizing more power, which they wanted to do anyway.

AG: Remem8er, I already have a lot of experience getting these simple minded agents to march to my drum 8eat.

AG: I was exiling them left and right in our session! I'm an expert at this 8y now.

AT: wHY WOULD YOU DO THAT,

AG: Tavros, at this point it should 8e o8vious.

AG: I am the unseen hand 8ehind every major event in their session, and to some extent, their whole lives.

AG: At least those events not happening 8y the volition of their own natural incompetence!

AG: Don't you think this is how it should 8e? Shouldn't the greatest player leave her fingerprints on every step of the rise to power of her ultim8 nemesis?

AT: wOW, nO, tHAT'S,

AT: i DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO SAY ALL THE WAYS i THINK THAT IS CRAZY,

AG: 8ut you must agree, 8ecause you were copycatting my idea.

AT: nO i WASN'T,

AG: You were 8razenly inserting yourself into Jade's history. The self-insertion plan was my idea, and it's revolting and cowardly for you to deny it.

AT: tHAT WAS, fOR A GOOD THING THOUGH,

AG: Hahahaha, sure. Whatever you say.

AG: It's incredi8ly sad how outclassed you are. It's actually depressing that you thought you could 8eat me at my own game. And then most sickeningly of all, you don't own up it!

AG: I have every angle covered already. The human session is on full Serket lockdown. Any effort you make to disrupt my plans will 8e laugha8le, just like everything you have ever done in your life.

AG: The only thing left to do now is prepare to kill Jack myself, and save everyone's ungrateful asses.

AG: It's a shame you're not strong enough to take him on with me. Too 8ad you spent so long sleeping instead of tur8o-leveling like me.

AG: We might have made a pretty awesome team.

AG: Oh well.

AT: oKAY, tHEN,

AT: aLL OF YOUR USUAL INSULTING THINGS ASIDE, mY TAKE ON THIS IS,

AT: tHAT YOU CREATED OUR IMPOSSIBLY HARD BAD GUY, wHO WANTS TO KILL US,

AT: aND BY ASSOCIATION, i GUESS THAT MAKES,

AT: yOU THE BAD GUY TOO,

AT: iNSTEAD OF A GOOD GUY WHO'S JUST MEAN,

AG: Nice deduction!

AG: Wrong, excruci8tingly linear, and laced with the sort of a8solutes morons like to throw around........

AG: 8ut nice!

AT: aND THAT BEING THE CASE,

AT: eVEN THOUGH i'M TERRIFIED OF YOU,

AT: aND nOT AS STRONG,

AT: oR REAL CONFIDENT,

AT: oNLY MOSTLY FAKE CONFIDENT,

AG: Yeeeeeeees?

AG: Go on.

AT: i THINK,

AT: i AM GOING TO HAVE TO STOP YOU,

AG: Yeah! That's the spirit.

AG: Pretty weakslime threat there, 8ut it's a start.

AG: Tell you what.

AG: If you can find me in this la8, you can have at me.

AG: I'll even give you a free shot! No funny 8usiness or anything.

AT: oK,

AT: tHEN,

AT: hERE i COME,

AG: I'll 8e w8ing. <3

[legalmoth]

Tbh, I actually think theres a completely viable precedent for that to succeed within the historical record.

like, yes it is completely true that the kinds of Séances that occured in London at the time played upon christian imagery and social frameworks or whatever, but if it wasn't aligned with an esoteric group, and it usually wasnt, the language of the church was often just skin deep, (if you start going to far, you land yourself in some contradictions, after all).

So having established that spiritualism and spiritualist belief isnt reliant on christianity, whats the likelihood of bringing in other religions and spiritual beliefs? super high! As youve already noted theres a lot of interest in Eastern art and tradition at the turn of the century (in varying quantities of depth and desire to actually learn about it of course, lol). This is due to the new access to semi-affordable travel, and among other things, this spurs on the creations of TONS of esoteric societies that incorporate international religious ideas into their own, making tons of new weird stuff. these usually don't have anything to do with spirit mediums and channeling, but it does set a lot of the precedent for a widespread willingness to adopt outside beliefs to varying extents.

And if the worry is whether or not the Londoners would accept the skin-shifting of Khurainise channeling, fear not. There is record of women whose appearance physically changed as she took on the body of the spirit, and this was a practice was believed to an impressive degree. A great example is the medium Florence Cook, and the spirit that she channeled called Katie King. Cook, in order to gain legitimacy, got close to a well respected scientist who was allowed to enter her cabinet and even touch her while she channeled spirits and confirmed that she had changed form and was a different person.

And how about the fact that this imagined character would have been foreign? There are historical examples of nonwhite people of various backgrounds using the spiritualist movement to gain power/stability and social capital in the late 18 to early 19 hundreds. (A short, helpful, and free to access paper on this subject is The Global Occult: An Introduction by Nile Green on Jstor). He does note on page 389 that these individuals were sometimes "stage managed" by a white man, but it wasnt always the case, and it could be fun to imagine a duo of two people who are in it together and the guy is just kind of like your white people hype beast. But again theres completely a precedent for this type of individual to take on an endeavor like this completely on their own.

So basically the long and short of it is: that's completely possible and lines up just fine with the historical record and your idea is equal parts really cool and would not be pushing the boundaries of what certain groups of victorian londoners were capable of believing. I believe that there are a lot of ways that a spirit medium could have been written into the story, and this is absolutely a viable one.

um. also im writing this on my phone in a Starbucks so im not about to edit it but i hope everything makes sense here, im not an expert i just happen to be reading a lot about spirit mediums in london right now. sorry for such a mammoth response lol

Actually its kind of insane that we DONT get a spirit medium in DGS considering how insanely popular spirit mediums were in Victorian London.

im not sure exactly how it would fit in but it surprises me that it didnt happen since spirit mediums are such a series staple ykwim?

[oriigirii]

Streamer MC headcannons with the brothers 💞

"You were quite a known face on social media back in the human realm, playing games, doing unboxings, just vibin in general, fans around the globe looked forward to your streams a lot! However, considering the sudden (unannounced) invitation to the exchange program, you had to leave all of that behind out of the blue. It wasn't as bad at first, but you have to admit you do miss the feeling of being able to do goofy shit online. Luckily for you, with the advance technology of Devildom and some spicy magic, the internet had synced with the human realm, and thats when you decided to finally re-enter the streaming scene. How will the brothers react upon seeing your peculiar past time?"

Head empty, No thoughts aside from the brothers just bothering the MC while they stream so here you go haha

Warnings: None, just crackhead energy and a lotta mispellings

Gender: Neutral!

Hotel: Trivago

* [ ಠ╭╮ಠ ] Lucifer *

{How did he know about your career?}

I honestly don't see him as someone who goes on the internet a lot

(He screams boomer to me, change my mind)

He doesn't have the time either, he's too focused on work!

So him finding out is gonna take a while

But! He did find out the hard way when shrilled screaming was heard from your room when he was passing by with some paper stacks in his arms (courtesy of Diavolo)

This man felt his instincts kick in, he ran as fast as he could, papers forgotten, and he immediately slammed your door open. Splinters scattering around, your door definitely damaged, as his eyes held a glare and his demon form was out, wings spread in a threatening display.

He was ready to beat someone's ass as he had thought someone had hurt you in here.

But all hes met with is you, infront of your chair and PC, and a game over on the screen...

To say he was unamused was an understatement cause you just lost your internet priviliges for giving him a heart attack (He said it was because you were being rowdy and noisy but with what you saw you knew that wasn't the case)

Good luck tryna puppy-eye your way to his heart to let you continue streaming lol.

If by some miracle you managed to wriggle your rights back from his hands, he'd warn you not to be so loud next time.

You already learnt your lesson though~ (Hopefully)

{How does he feel about your streams?}

Not everyone's the same, so if you were the shy soft streamer who does more art streams or something akin to a podcast, you can bet that Lucifer will be putting you on while he works, he kinda knows your streaming schedule at this point and if you were running late, he'd force one of his brothers to take over your dish washing duties or any chores you were stuck with

If you were the loud obnoxious meme type, hed still try to watch out of curiosity, and as much as he appreciates that you were getting comfortable here in Devildom with how you laugh and joke around, he still can't approve of it. Its too loud, its much like his brothers energy and he has enough of that already, so he probably doesn't watch as much.

He has countlessly came to your room to shush you and at this point your fans had made a compilation of each time Lucifer had barged in to tell you off

Look he likes it when you scream, but not when hes in the middle of work okay--

At this point, chat has deemed Lucifer as dad and you as their mom/dad.

If he ever catches wind of this he'd definitely be teasing you in private for centuries to come.

Overall fine with it, as long as don't do something stupid on stream.

* ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ Mammon*

{How did he know about your career?}

I would say he found out by him crashing into your streams midway but that's too predictable, hence why you've Mammon-proofed your bedroom during streaming hours!

Thanks to our wizard daddy, you have managed to cast a simple lock spell on your door and as well as a sound proofing

You love your broke idiot, but you did wanna keep the tone of your stream today a bit more chill, you wanted to have a proper Q&A with your fans to hopefully clear any bad vibes around your 3 month disappearance.

When Mammon has learnt your door was locked he definitely was a bit pissy, he knocked on your door loudly even and was calling out for you to let him in, but to no avail.

Bro he's scared.

He usually was allowed to enter, and you usually answered if you did need to be left alone for a bit, so just leaving him hanging got his mind racing and he had to press up his ear on the wooden door to try and hear if you were okay

When this continues on he finally resorts to getting help, but the only one in the house ws Levi, so he kicks down HIS door.

Levi boutta summon Lotan for interrupting him honestly

But as Mammon exclaim you weren't answering and he worried for your wellbeing, Levi rolls his eyes and scoffs,

"Idiot Mammon, they're streaming don't bother them…"

Streaming? why didn't you tell him???

Rude much.

He did huff and now was forcing his way to use Levi's PC for a moment

Can Levi stop him?

Nah.

He was busy on his console, and if he stood up now hed be breaking his world record so he was at a terrible state so he just resorts to threats of him drowning the Avatar of Greed if he does anything stupid on his PC.

He immediately logs in to your streaming platform and he watches for a bit,

You were more dolled up now just to look decent on stream, and he felt this jealousy rise as you interact with your chat, especially to those saying I love you's and stuff, and you even said it back? the audacity! You were his werent you? Were you replacing him with these nobodies?

He huffs as he realized that those who paid got their message highlighted, and thus, he starts donating. (Mind you this was Levi's account...)

"Mcccccc Open the dooorrr"

"Ill behave i promiseeeee"

"Cmon pleaseeee?"

Chat is c o n f u s i o n

NGL, they thought Mammon was a creepy stalker and red flags were being waved everywhere

but as chat was pondering who the hell he was, you can only sigh and look at the camera with that unamused expression, but ugh! you just KNOW hes doing that kicked puppy expression of his, and maybe it really wont be so bad

So you snap your fingers and say, "Okay MonMon, its open, Im giving you 3 seconds"

Mammon wasnt deemed to be the fastest out of his brothers for nothing

As soon as you got to '2', you were already tackled by the white haired male and chat went wild.

Now that you've shown your life in Devildom, maybe its time to introduce chat to your boyfriend no?

{How does he feel about your streams?}

You get paid to sit infront of a camera, do I have to say anything else?

But really though, as much as he enjoys the thought of getting so much cash from something so simple, he prefers the joy of being able to proudly exclaim that he was your first man!

ohhhh he thrives on the salt of your overly attached stans

but for those who fully support you, he always feels so mushy and shy when they say the ship you guys so hard

The fanarts has him WEAK (he may or may not have saved a few)

You usually do streams alone, but now you've allowed the door to be left open to let Mammon join whenever

Chat pogs when he enters with so much confidence, only for it to crumble when you kiss his cheek on stream.

Overall finds it fun to spend time with you, but just dont play scary games cause Lucifer might hang him upside down on stream.

* ▘▂▝ Leviathan*

{How did he know about your career?}

He is honestly the most attached to his D.D.D and he catches wind of almost anything going down in the internet, so your 'revival' being hyped up was something he definitely saw and he was just s wo o o ned

His Henry 2.0? a famous streamer?

Were you truly a blessing gifted upon him or was he dreaming?

He definitely didn't bring it up at first as he didn't wanna make it a big deal, but you notice hes been more in his head lately, and you have tried asking him what it was but to no avail.

You have to corner this little snake if you want answers and he eventually admits that he knew of your persona online and was incredibly shy to ask you to stream with him

He's a streamer himself afterall but maybe he doesnt stream as much as you do nor does he have as large of a following, so his intrusive thoughts attacked him and made him think that maybe since he wasnt as famous he didnt deserve to be in the same stream as you

Please tell him to join you and gib him kiss U3U

He'll absolutely m e l t

But now, as you make the announcement to your viewers and Levi to his, the internet explodes as a special collab stream was hapening between the expert gamer and avatar of envy of Devildom along with the beloved exchange student and streamer of the human realm

Your usual viewers reach between 10-15k, but as you start stream, that number boosts higher and beyond

Before streaming though, Levi was incredibly nervous, he'd picked the games for you to play that he knew you would enjoy with him, but his mind kept racing about whatthe fans thought, he didnt wanna disappoint them

But you had to remind him that whatever they say will not matter in the end as this was merely for fun, this was YOUR stream and you guys were gonna do what you want and nobody can have a say on it. (Maybe except Lucifer)

You usually talk for him with your bubbly personality, and to calm his nerves, he hs your pinky wraped around his where the camera can't see it.

Regardless, his thoughts subsided as you two delve into your stream that lasted a solid 7 hours, you definitely promised your chat that you and Levi will be doing more streams together from now on.

Once the cameras cut and yall are left alone, Both of you collapse on bed, and despite you being asleep already, Levi was just far too giddy as everything dwells on him.

Having a player 2 by his side now had never felt so intoxicating and he as just so lucky to have you.

{How does he feel about your streams?}

He obviously adores it, although some streams he wouldnt join just so he can play games on his own

He's still an introvert afterall, he needs his alone time

But he prefers that alone time with you, his Henry.

So when youre about to go stream, he kinda becomes a bit pouty, but with a simple promise of kisses (and maybe even more if youd like) he would let you go, but his attention would disappear from his game altogether.

He might just end up watching you instead

May or may not, at some point, just chat you and ask if its too late to join you

You do allow him to join you and play from the comforts of his room as both of you can simply play via internet, you give him the comfort to not turn on his mic or webcam either and you have no idea how he appreciates that.

Will definitely fight someone online when they start claiming you as theirs (-cough- stans) Please make sure it doesnt escalate to him summoning Lotan

Although the comments would often get to him, and as much as he can fight them online, he still does find himself pondering if they were true, so you need to give him a lotta lovin and reminder that he is your player 1 and no one else can ever fill that place.

------

Wow 3 brothers this time, what an improvement, anyways hope yall enjoy! I think its pretty clear who I simp for depending o nthe length of each lol, but do let me know if you guys want a part 2 for the rest of the brothers, or even the undateables!

[lesbinewren]

hey friend, i've been following your blog for a while now and i absolutely think you should go on a rant about modern sw canon being homophobic! i agree with you and i'd love to hear your points (especially re: anything having to do with tarkin, as im not as familiar with that) (:

ill try to not turn this into like a full six page essay lmao

so basically there are at this point a fair amount of gay/bi characters in sw canon atm... just none appearing on-screen (or at least not being explicitly gay on-screen) except for those two women that kissed for like half a second in tros. so thats point one i guess- all but completely restricting even acknowledgements of gayness to books/comics that dont get nearly as much recognition as the screen media does. 

point two is that theres a pattern of the main characters they choose to make explicitly gay as being... considerably less moral than others sometimes. and im not saying that every single gay character needs to be completely flawless with the sun shining out of their ass at all times, but why cant we get more lead, unquestionably heroic characters to be confirmed gay or bi? we have gay villains (tarkin being sorta confirmed gay in facpov, moff mors who deserves an entire post of her own), and then characters that are more like anti-heroes, or at least heros with darker pasts/tendencies (aphra, sinjir, arguably characters like sana, chass and yrica but those three to a much lesser degree). 

and i dont... dislike those characters. i actually LOVE aphra, shes probably one of my faves, and i loved sinjir and conder in aftermath. i dont really have any problems with their stories at all, it’s just that they’re part of a pattern of characters with sometimes questionable morality (aphra working with vader and happily siccing her droids to torture and murder people etc & sinjir being a torturer for the empire who then joins the rebellion and tortures sometimes for that cause too). like again, my problem isnt that gay characters arent paragons of virtue, its that most characters they happen to make gay also happen to be the morally gray ones. im not really asking for less dubiously good cay characters, just also more solidly heroic gay characters to balance it a bit. 

and they are getting better, there are more solidly heroic main gay characters... its just for every wyl lark or kaedan larte you have a gay imperial officer and an offhandedly mentioned dead pair of husbands. and i also dont think id mind as much if there wasnt a history in film especially where even implying gayness was prohibited unless it was condemned or shown to be immoral. i dont think its intentional, but its hard not to get that vibe when they make their biggest canon lesbian character blow up cute tooka cats for fun lmao (as much as i adore aphra)

and my third and probably final point for now is the deliberate vagueness of things, and the way that they sometimes confirm characters. i think they’re especially egregious about this with bi/pan characters. i dont have the direct quote, but when confirming lando to be lgbt during solo promotion, they essentially said he’s pan because he... has sex with droids and aliens? no mention of you know... being a man attracted to other men, that might be too controversial ig. also i think it was donald glover who specifically said something like “how couldn’t you be pansexual in space, there’s so many things to have sex with” as if thats what being bi/pan is which just... yeah.

and then also in the leia book (a book i really like), the “confirmation” of holdo being bi is when leia says something about sticking to “humanoid males” and holdo tells her “thats limiting” or whatever which a) its a personal pet peeve of mine as a lesbian when people say things like that, even tho its said to a straight person, its just insulting and acts like sexuality is a choice and bi/pan people are more enlightened by choosing not to “limit themselves” and b) in context they’re talking about a like... bug alien or something like that, its been a minute since i read the book but it wasnt just like a humanoid alien woman or anything. so again... being just vague enough to get woke points for your character being lgbt without actually having them express same gender attraction AND equating being bi to just being willing to screw whatever i guess.

and for the record i dont think that this all means star wars is being unforgivably homophobic. i DO think characters like aphra, sinjir and others are good representation, i just dont want characters like that to be our only representation, because thats when things start to get more questionable for me. but like, i think its AWESOME that aphra has her own comic line and audiobook where she’s very explicitly gay, and the fact that she’s probably the most popular modern star wars comic-originated character while being a lesbian seriously makes me happier than i know how to express. i think the fact that the alphabet squadron trilogy made two of its female leads explicitly bi and one of their male leads end up in a relationship with another man is amazing. i love sinjir and conder’s romance being a primary feature of the aftermath trilogy. i think its incredible cool of them to have the bravery to make an iconic character from the original trilogy pan, even if im not a huge fan of the phrasing they used (and would like them to be more explicit about it in future content). like, i dont want to be all negative because i think there is a lot of good rep there. i just know it can be better, and being allowed to criticize it makes me feel better about it, and hopefully will start more conversations that lead to them being more mindful in the future. 

[peachiikawa]

Caged Bird | Prince!Oikawa Tooru x Reader

a/n: if you know anything about fairytales then you might realize that the reader has the flute of the pied piper, though modified for the story. been watching a lot of once upon a time and got the idea from the neverland arc. hope you enjoy!

word count: 1.9k

genre: fantasy, romance

trigger warnings: reader gets hurt a bit but nothing graphic

summary: oikawa has always lived a lonesome life in the cage that is his castle. one day he sneaks out and a beautiful melody leads him to you, a traveling musician. oikawa is about to find out that his luck is going to change for the better.

oikawa gazed out over the town from his balcony

he let out a long sigh as he grew bored from his studies

“why the long face trashykawa?”

his bestfriend and knight walked up next to him and leaned against the railing

“oh you know, just bored of being in this castle. theres a whole town of people out there and im stuck in here. gets tiring after a while”

iwaizumi listened to his friend and nodded along to what he was saying

“then sneak out for a day”

oikawas eyes widened

“youd help me sneak out?”

“only if you come back by sundown”

so oikawa grabbed his cloak and thanks to iwas help got out of the castle

despite being born and raised in this town oikawa had no idea where he was

and after about ten minutes he was completely and utterly lost

until he heard the faint sound of a flute

he followed the sound until he ended up in the mostly cleared out town square where he saw you playing a small wooden flute for those who were present, though you had no audience

everyone walked past you as if you were invisible like you werent playing such a beautiful song

he approached you slowly and listened until you finished your performance

“that was really good”

you looked up at him and smiled

“always a pleasure to play for those who need it”

the bright smile on your face felt warm and inviting

like he was meant to be here

“would you like to take a seat next to me?”

you gestured to the spot next to you and he gladly took it

“so...whats your story”

hes hesitant to answer your question

“ill tell you mine if you tell me yours”

you set your flute down in your bag next to you

“well first of all my names y/n and my life is nothing too interesting. im a traveling performer and play my flute as a way to pass time and help those who need it. always come across the most interesting people this way”

traveling. thats something oikawa could only dream of

“so cmon now tell me about you”

he peaked at you through his hood

“ok but dont make a big commotion..im oikawa tooru”

you laughed a bit

“thats funny you share the same name as the prince”

you stopped laughing when you saw the serious look in his eyes

“oh..oh! im so sorry for being so rude!”

you started to scramble around when he grabbed your wrists to stop your movements

“shh yes im the prince but stop flailing people are starting to look”

once you had calmed down he went on

“ive been confined to my castle my whole life and stuck to certain rules i have to follow. it seems like even if i catch a break something else comes along. i have to stay this perfect image because im the prince and it just gets so lonely. its as if im a bird trapped in a cage and theres no way out”

ah so there it is

the reason he could hear your flute

you picked a flower that was growing next to you and placed it in his hair as you spoke

“im sorry your lifes been like that but oikawa, if i may be so bold, even a caged bird will become wise enough to break free. the dream of flying is too great to resist”

Once you had properly placed the flower you smiled at him before standing up from your spot and grabbing your bag

you then held your hand out to him

but he couldnt gather his thoughts

you were so bright it was almost blinding

“now cmon! lets go have some fun!”

he looked at the hand held out to him

and with a leap of faith, he took it

he was going to get out of this cage, this perpetual cycle

and finally add some meaning to his life

day after day you two spent your time together

oikawas days that were once filled with hollow words and empty actions were now filled with happiness

filled with you

and everyday slowly but surely he was falling for you

passing glances turned into prolonged gazes

his heart could no longer stay still around you

you became the key to his happiness

but for now...he had to be content with just being next to you

it would be too selfish otherwise

to ask you to stay with him here in the kingdom...he could never trap you like that

“so what are we doing today y/n?”

you were strolling through the town on a quiet sunday afternoon like you had the last few sundays

“how about we go to the bakery? theyre usually busy but since its sunday i bet its not as packed and then i want to take you somewhere”

he was curious as to what you had in store but decided against asking questions

so you two got some baked goods and headed out towards the woods

“cmon we’re almost there”

you pushed some branches and shrubs out of the way

and one eventually hit him in the face

“watch it y/n! i keep getting wacked by you”

you just chuckled a bit which oikawa had found adorable in itself

it made his heart slow just hearing it

“just come on!”

eventually you two made it to a clearing over a beautiful lake

he didnt know that there was something like this so close by

he was absolutely amazed by it

“take a seat oikawa! we can rest and eat here!”

this moment was just too perfect to him

with you here he felt as if nothing bad could happen

that if he only could see your smile everything would be alright

being content with just being at your side...was no longer and option

he knew that if he wanted this he needed to take his chance

“y/n”

your eyes were full of life and he couldnt help but feel so happy next to you

and before he knew it he was closing the gap between the two of you with a hand gently cradling your cheek

but right before you two could kiss you were ripped away from him

“dont you dare touch the prince commoner!”

oikawa frantically looked around as many of his guards came out of the brush

“get your hands off of them!”

you were pressed to the ground and the sight almost broke his heart

“sorry your highness but we’re under strict orders to bring you back and throw whoever was seducing you to leave the castle into the dungeon”

the guard that had been on you lifted you up like you were a sack and bound you by rope

you gave oikawa a final smile before you were taken away even though you were so banged up that it made him want to puke

he was speechless

this is what he was talking about

being so controlled and monitored made him feel so small and helpless

and he absolutely abhorred it

“your highness your mother is waiting for you in the throne room”

oikawa was beyond upset

this isnt how he wants to live

“mother how could you throw the only good thing in my life away!”

his mother sneered at his words

“only good thing? what need to you have for that filthy peasant! and how dare you cast me aside as if i hadnt given you everything you own, everything you are is because of me! i will not allow for any of this nonsense! now go wash up. and dont you dare ever leave the castle again and i forbid you from seeing that nasty peasant again. wasting your time with such a person...”

he gritted his teeth and was about turn to leave

his emotions were running too high

he wasnt himself and he knew it

but even so...he wont allow it to end like this

he was going to end it on his terms

“no”

“what did you say?”

he stood his ground

“i said no mother. im going to live the way i want and with who i want. ill gladly give up my title because frankly, i never wanted it in the first place. and dont you ever call y/n filthy or nasty again. their so incredibly kind and full of joy and laughter. i can only hope to be like that one day. so ive decided that im leaving. with y/n.”

as soon as the doors shut behind him he let out the breath he didnt even know he was holding

but it also felt as if there was a giant weight off of him now

“im coming y/n dont you worry”

it had been a couple hours since you were brought to your cell

you didnt have any major injuries, just a few cuts and scratches from when you were body slammed to the ground

“do you mind if i play?”

you pulled out your flute and the guard nodded

“thank you!”

you started playing and filled the cell you were in with a relaxing tune

“why do you play if it doesnt make noise?”

you stopped and looked at the spiky haired man who stood outside your cell

“it takes a certain person to appreciate its music”

he just looked at you as if you were crazy

but you continued anyways

until you heard frantic running coming from down the hall

“iwa you gotta let them out”

oikawa was panting trying to catch his breath

“dude no offense but your mom would kill me and you if i just let them out”

oikawa grabbed the key from iwaizumis waist before he even realized what had happened

“dont worry about it iwa. and dont worry about me. today i start my new life. it was good knowing you buddy”

they gripped hands the way they always had. A solemn but knowing look was shared between them

“if i had known me letting you leave the castle one time would lead to this...i would have done it a lot sooner. good luck out there bud”

oikawa quickly turned to you and helped you off of the ground

“you ready to run?”

he cupped your cheek and ran his thumb over one of the small cuts

hed be sure to treat that later

you nodded and leaned into his hand

“are you sure this is what you want?”

you were happy to leave with him

its more than you could ever ask for

“y/n youre the only person thats made me feel free. and by doing this i will be.”

you two finally got to share the kiss you had been deprived of and not only was it full of love but also full of hope for your future

“then lets go”

and you two sprinted off to your next adventure together

the flute you possessed was one he could no longer hear the sound of after that day

for it was enchanted, only to be be heard by those who were lost and lonely

with you he was neither anymore

and he couldnt be any happier than living out the rest of his days with you as a free man, a bird outside of its cage

[moonscarsandstars]

im having feels about alphard and i’ve never done one of these things so bear with me and also im way too sleepy but let’s not go there.

basically atticus 2.0

okay so let’s start off with etymology

the name ‘alphard’ is of course a star, because the Black family have an aesthetic to keep

but it’s the brightest star in the hydra constellation

you know who else was the brightest star in a constellation?

thats right, our one and only, sirius black!

his name also roots from arabic, which is pretty fucking metal for someone coming from a racist™ family

it derives from the word  “Al Fard“ which means ‘solitary one’

for some reason im getting victorian era widow living in windy hills writing poetry about her former lover but okay

but the correlation of astronomy and etymology between alphard and sirius has gotten me super hyped up on their relationship

of course uncle alphard was the cool™ uncle, but what if he was so much more?

what if he was the one who kinda brought sirius out of his shell?

because i cant imagine that living with the Blacks with such a fiery, rebellious personality would make for an encouraging childhood

so if sirius was this little kid, with so much pent up anger and suppressed personality

who was that small light in sirius’s life? like the one person who truly allowed sirius to be himself?

my old man, alphard

also for some reason, i get the vibe that he was really into either rifle shooting or archery

something muggle related that walburga didn’t want her kids near

but both reg and sirius was super curious, and absolutely loved it because it’s really the only muggle thing they’ve ever seen

and so every summer when the kids went and stayed with him

he’d show them his collection of rifles that he’d collected

and he’d tell stories of buying them from muggles and learning it with those wooden target dudes

and sirius and reg would just look up to him in awe because he talks to muggles!

oh and what if alphard, our old school rebel sometimes took them to muggle london?

imagine this: young sirius and reg wandering through 70s muggle london with this smart, friendly but also intimidating young man

and they’re just so excited, but they try to keep quiet because they were raised to sit still look pretty 

i hate their parents ugh

anyway so sirius finally snaps when he sees a popcorn maker

and for the first time alphard’s ever seen, one of walburga’s kids smiles

sirius points enthusiastically at the popcorn maker blurting out questions at the speed of light

until regulus tells him to keep quiet

sirius suddenly realises his outburst, and is filled with fear

because oh god, he loved uncle alphard, and the last thing he wanted was for his uncle to be mad

but then to his surprise

alphard just chuckles and smiles at him

his expression turns concerned when he sees the near tears in sirius’s eyes

“what’s wrong?” he asks in that gentle tone- that no one could expect from such a burly man

“i’m sorry,” stuttered out a five year old sirius, trying to keep tears in

“don’t be sorry! you were excited, there’s nothing wrong in having fun, is there?”

and this is the first time sirius has ever heard such a thing

so he looks up at alphard in confusion

alphard gives him that sweet, encouraging smile

and sirius hugs him like anything, holding on tightly and letting tears stain his robe

uncle alphard is actually the first person sirius had ever hugged

the only one he’d ever hugged until third year in hogwarts, when him and james had that conversation

back to alphard

these meetings to muggle london would be secret, and neither of them would tell their mother

regulus of course had his suspicions, and felt bad about hiding it from his mother

but in the end he loved fish and chips too much to give it up

especially when they had ice lollies while at the river or seaside

alphard and sirius had an even closer relationship once sirius was sorted into gryffindor

of course, he got the hateful and toxic letter from his parents

but a little while later

he also got one from alphard, which probably made him cry more than walburga

firstly because now uncle alphard would hate him!

but secondly because alphard was the only letter for a long time that’d encouraged him, and told him that he was still loved

and sirius just couldnt believe it

he couldnt believe that he had such an amazing uncle, who even loved him after he disappointed the family

and they corresponded a lot more than walburga knew

much more than walburga wanted them to

“because he’s a bad influence, mixing in with the wrong sort. don’t follow his ideas, they’re wrong”

it was also around then that sirius started questioning his own bigoted beliefs

and he started talking to uncle alphard about them

uncle alphard, being the atticus he was, guided sirius to the right path

(something that walburga would never know of)

also helping sirius make friends, because sirius was so lonely

fast forward to third year

puberty hits sirius like a fucking snake with angel wings on steroids

(dont question my similes)

so sirius starts getting crushes

but here’s the thing- he doesnt have crushes on girls

why not?

marlene was pretty, so was alice and emmeline

so why didnt he want to snog them senseless like james peter, and the rest of the boys did?

he sends letters to uncle alphard, who tells him not to worry

because as all, it doesn’t happen to everyone, and sometimes it takes a little longer for some people

it was also worth mentioning that he wanted to grow closer to fabian prewett

he didnt know why, but he probably wanted to hang out more often with fabian

and so he does

he hangs out much more with fabian, and finds that fabian wants to hang more with him

and that makes him happy

so one late night, both of them were staring at the stars, stolen drinks in hand

(they were at the age that firewhisky tasted disgusting, but an lightly alcoholic butterbeer or gillywater wasn’t bad)

so here they are

and neither of them knows who started it

but suddenly they were snogging each other senselessly

and sirius knew deep down it was wrong, but he just didnt want to stop

because there was this feeling growing inside him- this warm feeling that just made all the rules broken worth it

the next day, however, they both wake up in all sobrierity

and the horror of what they did hits them both like a brick

both of them run away from each other as fast as they can, fabian running to the kitchens and sirius running to the common room

what’s the first thing he does?

he writes to uncle alphard

because uncle alphard would know what to do. uncle alphard would know how to fix this

uncle alphard’s reply was like a punch in the gut for sirius

there wasnt a way to fix it

but there was more

sirius wasn’t broken

sirius wasn’t broken

sirius wasn’t broken

and though there was a hidden part of him screaming in his motehr’s voice

he knew that if alphard said he wasn’t broken, then he really wasn’t

and it was that moment that sirius felt it the most

not when he was sorted, not when andromeda patted him on the back

it was now that he felt accepted

[olde-scratch]

So I watched LUCIDS 1-4 without any prior knowledge...

and here were my thoughts. I didn’t watch any backstory or anything so enjoy my suffering.

PART 1

“So what happens when the people inside of their dreams go to sleep?” They die

“What happens when we wake up? Do they go on living while we’re not there?” THEY DIE-

“Who are they anyway?” they’re faces that our brain catalogs and stores for later use, although it’s also arguable that every time we dream we go to an alternate reality and inhabit the body of another version of ourselves. Now, were you in a car accident and trapped underwater or-

Are they twins?

(Me tuning out to do something)

“-the squirrel in spongebob was your soulmate, making you a Sandy simp-”

Me, snapping back to the video: hold up-

[missed the part about the worksheet, realized it when i rewatched 10 mins later to make this post]

yall speakin gibberish idk what youre saying-

“I’m gonna go to bed.” bro it literally looks like morning-

“You should get some sleep you look terrible.” i get six hours of sleep a night minimum and i look worse than him shut up bro-

“jump into someone else’s dream” ah i know this con-

why they all got the same face-

haha funni meme

“--an interruptiion can create feedback and tear them apart.” Death. I long for thee.

Is that Karl Jacob’s jacket?

“a second grader” makes me think this is a different school system. [i was wrong? i think?]

“[get him to] eat your apple”

[in the dream sequence] weird dream, but ive had weirder. now, Why Pamper’s-

why does he suddenly have a knife-

“You put a filter on the Dreamscape feed?”

“Technically, you are seven years old.”

???????????

the second hand embarrassment is UGGGHHH

[reading the description] you mean like the guy who was knocked out for 2 minutes on a football field and woke to find he’d dreamt 17 years of his life? oh this shall be Fun

PART 2

[I check the description] “jasper cult” what the fu-

how many camp camp references can i make during this

Is the apple a reference to religion or does the creator just really ilke apples?

“meal.”

“meal?”

meal????

Wait why couldn’t that guy eat the apple? If he wanted it in the fruit bowl, wouldn’t there be a chance of the guy eating it anyways?? Why can’t the guy who brought the apple eat it?

well he’s Dead

[debating if I should read the backstory}

n a h h h h h -

Was he gonna feed the dead guy the apple or something? Why is he upset about the apple in this scene???

oooo the grownups are fightinnnngggg

Is he an antagonist?

HE WROTE A BOOK???

oh now i want food

ESTABLISH JUSTICE ENSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITYYYYYYYYYYYYY

“I watched all those aforementioned shows” what shows did i miss something what-

man why you gotta hate on her jane austen fanfic let her live bro

string theory! i can get behind that! sorta-

o no he found the memes-

BOY GOT KNOCKED OUT-

kim there’s people that are dying-

is SHE an antagonist?

quinn? calling himself jasper? u sure hes not just nonbinary? is this just a metaphor for transphobic parenting?

“He died... but somewhere, he grew up.” So is your plan to take a Quinn from a different universe and make him your own, thereby robbing another version of yourself from happiness? When does this ever go well?

Yknow most people, when they lose a kid,,,, kinda,,,,,,, dont go on a ceaseless quest to find another version of their kid that grew up without knowing that another version of his mother was invading other peoples’ dreams to find and kidnap him,,,,,,,, like aint u got a therapist-

“Once you get past the point of not knowing what’s real anymore, you realize it doesn’t matter.” Well, I Got Called Out-

PART 3

“you’re real, oliver.”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

“you’ve been infected by the anti-love parasite of Mandadon” the amatonormativity is strong

so anyways ive been infected since birth hbu-

“James Jasperson, creator of Japple” did you mean to Fancy Well-Educated Man in a Black Turtleneck? cause the only FWEMBT i allow near me is prof. hidgens

“are you winning?” says the capitalist

why did you rewind to see his face?? you have the same face????? is this just bc the creator doesnt like working with other people cause in that case same but???????

“it’s a bad idea. i’m not gonna do it.” we’ve all been there. and we’ve all done it.

looks like me trying to study. (i say, a person who has studied a total of five minutes throughout their entire life.)

your “Spartan trial” looks like a bunch of guys standing on a hill pretending to be something they’re not. Let The Man Bring His Snacks.

eat the apple.

is this your first existential crisis or something what a loser lets all point and laugh

“One of you should be spared, the other shall’nt.” did you mean shant or was that a choice-

yall gonna get called out for talking shut UP

“sorry if this is too personal, btw. are you okay?”

me, confused and half understanding what’s going on and also needing to sleep cause its almost one in the morning but wanting to finish what i can find of lucids which i only starting watching cause i saw an animatic of ranboo and dream w audio from it: i don’t know anymore

“i just want my life back... i was gonna get married-” AREN’T YOU LIKE SEVEN-

ay man if this is a sacrificial cult yall gotta get daniel-

UPDATE: I  H A V E  N O T  F O U N D  I T -

“oliver”

I  F O U N D   I  T -

WHICH ONE IS QUINN?? WHO’S JASPER???? WHICH ONE IS BENJAMIN???? I THOUGH BENJAMIN WAS SEVEN BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED WHAT-

oliver. eat the apple.

“Can you still have memories even when you’re dreaming?” One time I woke up to my alarm and fell back asleep and in my dream I remembered that I had class in a few minutes and my dream self woke my real self up so fast I thought I was gonna get whiplash. Anyways, I was late to class bc of my computer but that doesn’t matter.

NOPE I FOUND IT. HERE’S THE AUDIO. THE ANIMATIC ONE. FINALLY.

im thinking car crash. but also maybe murder. but also maybe both? is it raining or was he drowning? is he in a coma? hmmmmmm?

wait olivers the one with the apple does that mean he’s the one dreaming? is the ending gonna be him and jasper (quinn? idk) fighting against ben and mrs hills about jasper eating the apple to save oliver from the dream? hmmmmmmmmmm-

waitwaitwait i thought oliver was 7 how is benjamin 7 years younger than him if they look the same age what what what explain america explain what you mean arkansaw-

are the cuts on his nose plot-relevant or

“What if you hadn’t been driving?” So I was right about the car accident but Mrs. Hills still said he was seven so did i mishear her say that BENJAMIN was seven? but even then oliver would be 14 and that would still be illegal-

“How are you feeling?”

“Like you’re a pretty bad therapist.”

mood

“--it makes it all bearable to have power over the stories we write in our heads” that’s why i write fanfiction

HE’S GOT THE NOTEBOOK HE’S GONNA WRITE SOMETHING ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

WHAT YOU MEAN AN EXPERIMENT THAT’S HIS NAME-

[upon reading the description] so i was right.

wait was that supposed to be the twist in part 2 about the apple in his pocket is that what the existential crisis was about i thought it was because he was introduced to the multiple worlds theory-

PART 4

wait wasnt the other one january 2018 why we going back to 2017-

appol

“--the future and the past all already exist” mhm yep figured this out long ago

there was simultaneously a point in time in which i hadn’t known about this, had been looking it up, had been watching it, and had been writing an ending to this post, and had been posting it the next morning before class. that time is both now and not now. Welcome To The Multiverse Theory or whatever its called-

“--my favorite scene of the movie is waking up next to you.” Mine is eating fast food as I listen to AJJ and play Minecraft. We are not the same.

Now I’m hungry but it’s 1 in the morning and i already put my retainer in god fu-

[reading description] what do you mean previously??? she did that in the first episode????????

[still on description] WHAT DO YOU MEAN WILL QUINN BITE THE APPLE AND GO TO BENJAMINS REALITY ISNT THIS OLIVERS REALITY AND HE HAS TO GET BEN TO BITE THE APPLE WHY IS APPLE CAPITALIZED IS THIS THE DOING OF THE FWEMBT

i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have wa-

[description] oh ive been spelling quinn right the whole time nice

i hope she rejects you /j

WAIT BENJAMIN WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE

ISNT HE IN SECOND GRADE-

HE IS SEVEN YEARS OLD HOW IS HE GETTING MARRIED ARE THERE TWO BENJAMINS THAT WE’RE FOCUSING ON-

bro get out of the road ull get hit

how do you knOW WHICH ONE IS QUINN THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON-

so

wait

hills wants ben to feed quinn the apple bc in his mind, that will give hills and quinn a happy ending and she doesnt want ben to see the apple bc thats gonna mean ben will know that his reality isnt reality at all. so then oliver has to,,,, not let anyone eat his apple? he just has to wake up?

IS HILLS THE VILLAIN AFTER ALL ORRRRR

wait but if ben sees the apple wont he realize that his reality is wrong and his reality will change, making it so that hills doesnt get her son? or is there some time-based rule that says they’re only transported to the reality that the person believes at that moment? or is this another stab at the multiverse thing where an infinite amount of hills gets their happy endings while an infinite amount of hills doesnt and etc etc?

i should have watched the ba-

oooo dramatique

they’re in a time loop?

nope thats a new powerpoint

wait so theyre,,,, no-

wait-

nvm-

IS THE BEN WE KNOW AN ADULT GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE OR NOT-

“they were actually pretty nice” didnt they throw someone off a cliff-

oh so it got confusing THEN??? NOT BEFORE?????

“it all seemed so real.” is that Not the point of vivid REM sleep hallucinations-

is oliver gonna show ben the apple and ruin hills’ whole operation

WHO ARE ALEX AND RYAN-

“what’s 25-8″ bro dont do this to me-

yep hes gonna show the apple

ayyy the guy who stole karl jacobs jacket it back

the second hand embarrassment is back and I Hate It

all that happens in episode ONE??? bro get some better writers that is bad pacing

“it’s the best!” wait until season eight. no show has a good season eight.

quinn knows about the apple thing w the dreams and multiverse and realities dont he

YOU KILLED HIM

NOT KARL JACOBS NOOOOO HES ALREADY DIED ONCE

oliver is v relatable

wHaT iN tArNaTiOn-

lemme hear that explanaton again-

is bill cipher gonna show up? i hope bill cipher shows up. i miss gravity falls

“ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” moooooooood

did hills murder quinn

is your family the jasper cult

TOXXIICCCCCC get that lady out of your life quinn that is so toxic

“ ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!  ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT’S THE END NO WHAT WHY NO

The Adventures of Benjamin and Oliver

he is Not Good

ope-

wait so ben is equal parts an adult AND a child?? okay that clears a lot up

I MEAN HE WAS RIGHT THO BEN U CAN’T REALLY ARGUE ON THAT-

ew get off the floor

butterfly effect, multiverse theory, memory decay, and your imagination ALL exist yall gonna ignore that cause you wanna be famous?

“We already know what the future looks like!”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

to add to the list of bad things: Cats (2019)

YA BOI THINKS IT’S NOT ALREADY FIFTY YEARS TOO LATE TO START FIGHTING CLIMATE CHANGE FFFFF

BINGO BABYYYY

get what what

what mapped-

awwwww he thinks THEY’RE creating the multiverse

you gonna dismiss the multiverse theory bc of something you created in your current reality? loooserrrrrr

ABUSE YOUR GODLIKE POWERS

she draggin that seven year old

a lot makes sense now why didnt i do this first-

Jasper

the food shortages-

bro that calculators like 90 bucks at walmart

imagine meeting a stranger and they know Everything about your life like that’s gotta be so weird

what’s even weirder is them telling you you’re the deity of a cult that sacrifices animals

THAT FOURTH WALL BREAK WAS-

KARL JACOBS IS DEAD NOOOOOO

ooohhh there’s context for that

OOOOHHHH THERE’S CONTEXT FOR THIS TOOOO

w h a t -

w  h  a  t  -

W   H   A   T   -

Conclusion:

it’s 2 in the morning and i need sleep but hOOOOO MY GODS THAT WAS GOOD IS IT OVER OR NOT IDK ANYMORE IM TIRED THAT WAS CRAZY I HOPE QUINN AND JASPER GO ON TO BE VERY GOOD FRIENDS, AND I HOPE BENJAMIN AND OLIVER STAY VERY GOOD FRIENDS AND I HOPE HILLS FINDS A THERAPIST WAS A LITTLE CONFUSING BUT I ENJOYED IT

if i dream about apples im suing /j /lh

[aprito]

hello <3 since i got these asks at the same time i decided to combine my thoughts on them in this post. yet another annoying sjw essay from yours truly on this blog 

before i get into these i think i need to preface why im like. i guess overly hyperfocused on a certain unproblematic base (same age au / platonic canon) for them and avoid the ped0philic content like the plague lol

tw for pedophilia ment, rape ment if that makes you squicky. ALSO THIS IS LONG AND RAMBLY

as i’ve mentioned a couple times already, ive been into the ship since i was 12, back when it was very very common to not only post untagged (nsfw) canonverse content of the two in writing and in drawing but also non con and the like, so you can imagine how bad my first impression online was. thinking back on it ...as a child i found it disturbing but didnt really register how problematic it really was?? (i know, but i also lived in the middle of nowhere and had no one explain this to me) 

skip to 2014 aka me coming back to naruto at 17ish and i had kinda become hyper aware of the fact that there was an increasing amount of people online who had come forward with explaining how fictional problematic content, mostly pedophilia, had been used to groom them into starting relationships with adullts. it was also a time where a lot of people didnt believe these victims, not registering how common it was for minors to be online friends with adults who had no boundaries and no qualms exposing them such content. not gonna get into my personal life here but i was lucky to not having gone through this myself. like... it kinda was my first time truly realising how fiction can EASILY be used to manipulate others irl (and yes i will not argue this, if you dont think fictional media can form and manipulate people’s opinions on attitudes, countries, cultures and virtues, pick up a book about the effects of propaganda media at least once please) 

i, being young, still liking the dynamic but not really the romance, would point this out here and there in the fandom and get into fights with grown adults in their mid 20s who assumed i automatically hated the ship(s) and tried to restrict their freedom of speech or whatever, heard everything from the “age of consent doesnt exist in naruto” to the “sasori looks like a child what does it matter” despite people clearly playing on him being older and experienced. it made me so upset that people were just consuming all this content uncritically and exposing children to it tbh?? not really just sos but a lot of minor/adult ships in naruto in general. and thats where i sat down and thought, i do not want to be a grown adult talking down to children that point out how unsafe the fandom is. theyre absolutely right in drawing these boundaries and calling out adults who defend the uncritical consumption and creation of this content. i do not want to consume or create content that predators could use to groom minors, and i absolutely do want to let younger people in fandom know that i am respecting their comfort zones and want them to have a safe and fun experience. after all, naruto is not an adult show and i think a lot of people forget that!!!! i am not perfect in that regard but its something that i, at the age of 23, am very passionate about and strive towards to.

and i guess thats where same age au was born for me and i have been sticking to it ever since. 

so finally we can move to the first question 

aside from the fact that we both dont like canon sos, i dont think it would work out even if i wasnt prejudiced to it anyways. in all honesty, 35 year old canon sasori is not a redeemable character to me, given the fact that he’s easily amongst the cruelest villains in naruto (torturing and killing and taxiderming people for his own fun personal gain, never for a goal that served anyone but himself. how do you redeem having over 300 corpses in your backpack that you felt absolutely no remorse for killing). sasori was legit one of the only cruel villains that didnt had someone else pull the strings, which sends a clear message on kishi’s part, who absolutely loves to redeem villains LOL.

being that old, he obviously had already been very manifested in what he believed in, even if it was shakey, to the point where the first crack in that world view (sakura and chiyo protecting each other) immediately had him give up on his life all together. that, in my opinion, is not a man who’s going to know what healthy relationships would look like, regardless of it being romantic or not. 35 year old sasori to me has the same appeal as an expired can of tuna and he’s probably very happy 6 feet under. he’s supposed to be a failed gaara in that sense that he had no one to look out for him and therefore was never going to experience anything but a bad ending in life. its fine that hes dead honestly, it wraps up his short character development the best IMO.

adding to that, seriously, sakura was obviously interested in knowing why he was that way, and called him out for being seriously fucked in the head, but it’s weird to me that people assume she had any interest in actively rehabilitating him, let alone starting a serious romantic relationship with him. sakura who’s not only very, uhm, immature and straight forward when it comes to her romantic viewpoints also, as a big bootlicker, wouldnt soil her standing in the village by starting anything with a disgraced and far too gone criminal like sasori. shipping that version of sasori with sakura intimately is still going to set her up for a huge power imbalance that would be difficult to handle imo, even if she was the one in the fight ultimately exerting her power over him. i would still look at it and think damn she deserves better than having to play therapist for man like that lol.

additionally, even if you ignored all of this, you cant really ignore that sasori had already known her as a child, and that had been his first and most impactful impression of her. i dont think that sasori would look at 35 year old sakura and see her as a grown woman and not the little green girl she was in the fight. plus, you easily fall into predatory comparison territory between the “childish” and “womanly” and i have seen way too often in fic just being boiled down to her now being fuckable. a lot of of ships do this and i would just like to remind yall thats it not normal for adults to want to start relationships with children they have seen grown up or known as a child when they themselves were fully grown adults. therefore, maybe if sakura hadnt met sasori before it would be less of a problem? but that also obviously defeats the point of the dynamic and the reason he died in the first place. so yeah, it sounds kind of doomed especially if you were to make it romantic. 

WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE SECOND QUESTION

let me preface this that im not fundamentally against age gaps, even if im not super interested in it. after all, colorblind had a 5 yr age gap (with sakura being 21), even if, say, i wrote similar fics today i probably would make it smaller lol. i think it can be handled well if both parties have enough life experience to deal with it, and the author is cautious of where the age gap starts, i think a 10+ year age gap would be fine in a scenario where the younger party (i guess sakura) was at least 25-27ish, meaning she has completed most of her most formative life stages and probably had been in relationships before, meaning she would be able to handle it without having to fear a huge power imbalance. the older the younger party is the less the age gap is going to matter tbh .TsukiHoshino and AngelOfDeath10 both handle age gaps in their fics really well imo, so i do not mind reading about them.

unfortunately, a lot of people in this fandom think making sakura barely "”””legal””””” (18, not even 20 which is hilarious to me because the source material is obviously japanese) because they both cannot stand her being past her “prime years” of being young fertile and fuckable to much older men as well as thinking a 20 year old is automatically old enough to handle that type of relationship. ive seen a lot of unironic takes that believe it will absolve them of callout posts if they throw around age of consent and “shes 18 now suckers!!!” enough lmfao. absolutely hilarious. aging a minor up without aging the adult down seriously reeks of predatory “cant wait until youre 18″ narratives and thats why i find it similarly disturbing as straight up pedo shipping.

ultimately, sasosaku is and will always be a inherently problematic ship in canon, which is why i think it should always be handled a little more responsibly in fandom spaces, ignoring or outright excusing the main problem factor, which is sasori, isnt going to convince anyone that the dynamic in itself is well written and interesting enough to explore in aus, like giving sasori the redemption most of us wanted him to have by aging him down to a point in time where he was still realistically going to allow being positively influenced, similar to gaara. 

so really, what i think is well handled age gap and how most people handle age gap in the naruto fandom are two different worlds at times lol 

tl;dr

canon shippers have never been anything but gross when i was younger and i didnt wanna be like that, even if youre “smart”enough to differenate, actual creeps dont really care and might use your content to blur the lines, sasori isnt rly redeemable so romantic canonverse realistically wouldnt make much sense and is still iffy, age gaps are fine if they are handled well, but given that the dynamic doesnt really need the age gap to still work im not that invested on making that an essential part of my shipping experience.  

thank you for reading and hope this makes sense!