#now I've spend way too much time spamming you guys I will see if I can also get some sketches done xD
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mitamicah · 2 years ago
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New additions to my little Käärijäs (and a Häärijä) :3 Have I finished any since last time? No x’D but I’ve decided to see if I can make it a 13 part set (because he was 13 in the running order and I want to suffer jk x’D)
The ideas I have for the 13 parts at the moment is under the line :3 (May change)
One – Cha Cha Cha – sketch done
Two – It’s Crazy It’s Party (champagne) – sketch done  
Three – Pockedsized Käärijä – sketch done
Four – Mr. Worldwide – sketch done
Five – Paidaton Riehuja – sketch done
Six – Wild Häärijä appeared – sketch done
Seven – Vääcation Gretings (Jere and Frank)
Eight – Pëlia! OR Best friends (Jere and Bojan = if not done for thirteen)  OR Agressive blep (because it is cute)
Nine – Stay Hydrated (Bulbasaur hat and waterbottle)
Ten – Send heart if Bojan’s hot
Eleven – Nyt lähden tansimaan (blonde wig)
Twelve – Mic Mac (little dance)
Thirteen – Honorary Slovene (holding Slovenian flag OR hanging out with the boys OR him and Bojan)  
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lowpolyanimals · 1 year ago
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How are you doing?
hey! I am doing much better these days, PMDD is kicking my butt every month still but I am doing pretty well considering. I had to reduce my hours in work to help reclaim some of my life that PMDD takes but it helps a lot so I am very grateful I am able to do that. I got married last year and now am living with my spouse so that has been a dream come true and is such a big help too! I still have way too many hobbies and counting (thanks neopets) for my time available but I am slowly rotating them all and making the most out of my time finally!
I am really sorry that I was away for so long. At the time that I left, I was just so overwhelmed due to my PMDD getting worse and becoming unbearable, working whilst ill, trying to catch up on work / life missed due to ill health etc. and it all got a bit too much for me. Even the thought of coming back to the blog after a couple weeks was too overwhelming (because of how I was running the blog at the time). Later on I had also deleted Tumblr from my phone in an attempt to reduce screen time but it meant that I stopped using it completely and I regret that it largely contributed to me staying away for so long.
I want to give this blog a big old reboot and get it up and running again but I realised that I need to change the way that I run the blog. Previously I had this HUGE backlog of submissions that caused me to have to spend hours and hours one day of my weekend to get through so many submissions. I wanted to just power through until eventually I’d get to the point where I’d just be able to handle submissions as soon as they come in then and there but there was just too many and it took too much of a toll and I hit breaking point. :(
So I’ve decided to just run the blog now how I've always wanted to - by dealing with submissions as and when they come in and opening/closing submissions to keep it to a manageable level (I'm sure this is how other blogs do it, I think I am just dumb lol). I will also post them immediately as and when they come in and only use the queue if I’m going to be posting several posts in a row to avoid spamming. It just means posting will be a bit more sporadic sometimes that’s all. However, in order for me to do this, I am going to have to omit the backlog (for now). I can always go back to the backlog and shave some off if I can handle it (or please feel free to resubmit anything I've not already posted).
I’ll make a new pinned post in a couple of days explicitly explaining the new changes to how the blog will be run behind the scenes, although honestly it’s not going to affect much on you guys side of things, you will still see the same content and submit the same way. I just want to add a rule to say please do not submit more than one post a day and that I’ll open/close submissions to keep things manageable. Submissions will stay off until that post comes out so just bear with me (🐻) a little longer!
Just want to say before I end this really long post (they always get so out of hand lol) that I MISSED YOU GUYS TOO and I LOVE YOU ALL and your kind messages made me so very motivated to get this going again, thank you! 🥺❤️ I can’t wait to bring you more of these little critters we love so much once again :)
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livwritesfics · 1 year ago
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𝐋𝐚𝐰 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞
A/n: I've been working on this off and on for months. I hope this is good! I kinda had a brain rot at the end but I hope this is okay! I'll be opening requests again when I'm on Christmas break in December so feel free to go spam that lol. Enjoy!
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When Nadine was 16, they were on an island and she got a date. Not only was a boy taking his daughter out, but their date was on a Friday. That was cutting into their daddy and daughter time where they read the Sora comics. That was their Friday night thing!
"I forbid from going out on that date! You're too young to be dating!" Law yelled, walking behind her.
"So what?! You probably done worse things at my age than me!" Nadine argued back, turning around to face him.
Law had to think about that for a minute. "Yeah, well... I didn't have anyone to look after me Nadine." He quieted his voice down. "I want to take care of you. I don't trust you going out with any boys. I know what they're like, I was at that age before." He walked closer to his daughter. He put a hand on her shoulder.
Nadine glared at him before shrugging him off violently. "You never let me do anything for myself! You don't trust me!" she hollered at him. "That's not what I'm saying!". They began yelling again until Nadine had enough. She turned around and went to her room.
"Trafalgar D. Water Nadine! We are not done with this conversation!"
"Well I am Law!" She slammed the door in his face leaving him shocked.
"We don't slam doors in this sub young lady. Open the door this instant!" he demanded in a low voice after taking a deep breath.
"NO! You can't make me Law!" Nadine shouted from the inside of her room.
Penguin, Shachi, and Bepo were watching this all go down and they finally told him to calm down.
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"I don't know what to do with her. I just don't know!" He ranted with a drink in his hand.
They were sitting around a fire. It was Bepo's idea to do camping again. It was fun for the crew. They tried to do it yearly. Because of the alliance with the Strawhats, they were camping with them.
"Law, she's sixteen, you can't keep babying her forever." Penguin stated, putting a hand on his shoulder.
"Boys at that age... I don't trust them. Plus-"
"Law, she can't spend every Friday for the rest of her life reading comics with you. She's a teen, let her go out and learn." It was Bepo this time. Law was surprised as Bepo never tells Law what to do.
"I guess you're right." He sighed softly, looking down. His daughter wasn't little anymore.
He was at her bedroom door before he knew it. Knock, knock, knock. He knocked on her door. She answered, cocking an eyebrow annoyed at the sight of him.
"You can go." He said. He didn't know what to feel at this point. Mad, sad, happy?
"Are you kidding? This isn't a joke right?" Nadine asked trying not to give her hopes up.
Law shook his head and Nadine hugged him tightly. "Yes! Yes! I can go!"
"You better be back by eight pm though. I'll 'shambles' him if he's a minute late with you. No kissing, no sex, no touching of anything. It's okay to say 'no' too."
"Dad stop! Ew!"
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Nadine was on the edge of her seat waiting for him. She couldn't wait! She was with everyone at the campfire. It was around six pm.
"Now you know the rules okay? First, no kissing. Second, three foot rule. Third, no touching of any kind. None of that. And he better have you back by eight." Law spouted to her.
"Dad-"
"Oh and also, here! If he starts touching you in a way you don't like you push this button." Law instructed her on how to use the taser.
"Stop. Okay, goodness and put that away."
Everyone was watching these interactions trying to stifle laughter. It was amusing to see Law care too much.
Finally, the date came. Law stood up to greet him, ignoring Nadine's protests.
"You must be the lucky guy." Law greeted coldly. He held out a hand.
The guy took it. "Lucky? I don't know. Definitely looks it." He smirked.
Nadine, being too naive, didn't get what he meant and took it positively while everyone else grimaced and glared.
"Have her back by eight or else." Law disregarded the comment.
"Sure, sure."
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Fast forward to eight, Nadine walked back to where her dad was by herself. She was crying silently. Her dad was right. He was so right. Boys are stupid. Boys are gross.
And this boy tried doing something yucky to her.
She looked up and saw her dad and her crew and the Strawhats. She walked over keeping her head down.
Law picked up that someone was coming and turned to look. "Deenie! You're back!"
Nadine didn't say anything for a minute but then she whispered, "I'm sorry."
Law opened his arms.
"Dad, I'm too old to sit on your lap!" She exclaimed embarrassed.
"Are you kidding? You're never too old to sit on my lap!"
She sat on his lap and buried her head into his neck. "I'm sorry, you were right." Her voice cracked. "You were right about boys all along."
Law held her and rubbed circles on her back. "Yeah? He didn't even walk you here? They don't raise these boys to be gentlemen anymore, huh Peng?"
Penguin just shook his head as he saw his niece crying. The talking quieted down and Law was rubbing his daughter's back.
"What happened?" he asked her soft but sternly. He was so going to kill this boy once he found out what happened.
Nadine raised her glance to look at her father. "We were sitting down and eating. He took me to a nice place. That went well. But as we were walking there and while we were eating he would look at me but not at my face. You know? Then on the walk home he touched my a$$ and... I kicked him and ran away from him." she said disappointedly.
Law was very angry at this boy that took her out. But, he did like the part where she kicked him. Definitely like her mother.
Law chuckled at the end. "You take after your mother!" he quieted down after a little bit and looked down at his beautiful creation. "I'm proud of you. I'm sorry he wasn't the right one. But you'll find one soon enough."
Nadine wiped her tears, "Thanks dad."
They stayed in silence for a bit until Law looked down at her and said, "You look just like your mother. She was really beautiful, you know that?"
Nadine loved to hear stories of her mother. When she was little she constantly asked what she was like and for stories of her.
"Yeah, you told me. You said she was the love of your life."
"She was. Soon you'll find the love of your life too."
"I love you dad."
"And I love you."
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6okuto · 3 years ago
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Hi Nia, I Love your LL headcanons! I tried to send this once b4 but tumblr went weird, so sorry if this is spam. I've seen it said b4 that mcs in dating sims/interactive novels tend to be Very emotionally resilient & seem to do a lot of the heavy lifting in regards to emotional support in relationships w/ LIs prolly due to practical reasons writing wise since mcs are player characters. What if this imbalance was addressed with mc & M3 + Rime.
Like our ever light-hearted, supportive, & kind mc has always been a pillar. Someone they can always rely on to reassure, amuse, & diffuse. As the LIs spend more time with mc they begin to see the cracks in the foundation that mc themself doesn't notice &/or acknowledge. Then upon closer attention to what scant details mc does share about their personal life(master of conversational evasion) that the story of mcs life is that 'oh mc is personable and always does the right thing we don't Need to worry about them, so we Won't.'
Owww my heart 💔 ya know just eldest child vibes. And just for extra pain mc doesn't even see anything wrong with this so when it's addressed and they cry, mc is confused for second. Thinks it's rain dripping on the back of their hand cuz they couldn't feel the silent tears going down their face🥺
note: hii thank you that means a lot to me :[ and omg Real. if this is any of u guys i need u to take the dialogue and Jam it into your head. that's not just them that's ME speaking now. u have to listen to me bc i am the writer and u love me /j also hooomygod i did Not think this would take as long as it did . guh
felix
mc's kindness was something felix had always admired
no matter what the world and their enemies threw at them, they had a warmth for others, for him, that never faded or tired. he couldn't imagine how tiring it might be
but he worried. he worried when they would go out and do chores for the others, be the one to speak when they all felt low and promised they'd all get through it, even when they offered to hear him vent, their kindness was never faltering and he worried.
"felix? are you okay?" he looks up from the book in front of him and at mc beside him on the couch, who noticed he hadn't moved for a few minutes. he doesn't answer and instead asks "how are you so kind?"
they blink, not expecting that to be his response. "what do you mean?" "i mean, you offer to help everyone no matter your own responsibilities, you try to cheer us up, you listen and try to resolve our problems without expecting us to do the same—without expecting anything. how aren't you...exhausted?"
mc doesn't make eye contact while they think. they shrug, "i never said i'm not exhausted. i just...push past it." felix places the book on the table and frowns, "mc, you shouldn't feel pressured to help. you're as human as the rest of us."
they shake their head, "i love helping people, i want to help people. but..." felix is patient, he only moves them closer to stroke their back and occasionally press a kiss to their head.
"i mean, you're right. sometimes i do...i do wish people would do the same for me. and i know it's selfish to want them to notice and bring it up first. i know i should just bring it up myself but i can't because—" their voice breaks and tears well in their eyes. "because what if i ask one day and they can't? they don't want to? i have to be the strong one, i always have. i don't know how not to be."
even now, mc feels like they've said too much—taken up too much space and time. there's a hint of fear in their eyes when they pull up to look up at felix.
they don't expect him to have a frown and tears of his own forming before he speaks, "i'm sorry you've been dealing with this alone for so long." and they don't expect the way he hugs them after either, or how much they melt into it while finally letting themself cry
he holds them tightly and takes time to think of what they need to hear, not minding how they sob against his skin. he should have noticed it sooner. and he can't take all that time back, but he can at least work to help with it now. "you wanting someone to notice your pain...it isn't selfish. that's being human, and so is taking time for yourself."
"but what if people need me? i can't just stop helping," mc mumbles into his chest. "no," he says firmly but gentle. "other people's happiness is not your responsibility. you have to do what's best for you."
he tilts their chin to look at him, "you're allowed to be tired, or to hurt, or to ask for help. you deserve that, maybe more than anyone else i know. you don't have to be strong all the time, love."
felix plants a kiss on their forehead, "you've done so much for us, for me. please let me do the same. the next time you need help, come to me first, please."
his thumb grazes their cheek as they nod and he smiles, "even the kindest and strongest of us are allowed to rest, hm?"
sage
sage has always been perceptive of others
he and felix are in the kitchen when mc comes in, good mornings swapped between them. he already noted how they seemed quieter than usual, steps a little heavier. felix asks how they're doing and they smile, "i'm alright. how are you felix? you were reading that novel last night, right?"
felix starts explaining what he read and sage decides to tune out, but doesn't ignore how quickly they evaded the question
they do it a lot, really. like when anisa would ask about earth and they explained enthusiastically until she mentioned their own life. they only offered a tight smile, "mm, normal, i guess? there's nothing super interesting. oh! back to what i was saying..."
even when they did offer details, sage wonders if they realized what they were revealing. they would mention how it was alright to vent to them, it was normal and people would always come to them back on earth. they mentioned late trips to get something a friend forgot, or to pick up groceries when no one else could. but they never seemed to complain. they were always stubborn with their kindness, it seemed
so it's no surprise to him when he tries to bring it up, that they do the same habit again. it catches them off guard while they sit on his bed but they compose themself quickly, "i just like helping an focusing on other people, that's all. i promise i'm alright."
he frowns, "you're lying." mc blinks but before they can deny it he starts again, "you evade questions when people try to focus on you."
"no i don—" "yes you do. you change the subject and don't want help. why?" mc opens their mouth to speak, but only shrugs and looks away. "i don't know, i just...do. i always have. it's not like i have much that's important to bring up. and people...people struggle more than they let on. they have hard days and need someone to talk to and i know that so, you know." (their voice begins to waver at the end, sage notes.)
"but you? you don't?"
mc tenses and he gently holds their hand in response, "hey, trust me, alright? i know what happens when you bottle things up for too long. you can talk to me."
and maybe he didn't realize how long they had been keeping it locked up because just those words seem to break them.
"i'm sorry," mc cries weakly. but all sage does is pull them into him, "don't do that. don't apologize for this."
"but i don't wanna worry you or the others," they say against his chest. "mc, i'm going to worry about you and whether you're alright either way. you know that. did you try anisa's cooking the other day?" sage smiles a little when they laugh and nod
he sways back and forth a little while pressing his face against the top of their head, "i just want you to rely on me. you can't...you can't take care of everyone all the time. that'll never be your responsibility. not if i can help it."
mc sniffles and he pulls away to brush away their tears, "you're just as important as the rest of us, so whenever you get tired just come to me, alright? i'll always be here for you."
anisa
sometimes anisa thought that mc was a saving grace
when she rolled her eyes at sage and felix's bickering, she couldn't help but smile when mc laughed. when she was stressed and tense from work, they'd offer a massage and bath with no hesitation. they would listen to her vent about annoying people, her fears and insecurities, whatever was on her mind. but she didn't fail to note how they never seemed to do the same
she decides to bring it up herself after a long day. they're laying in bed as she traces shapes on their skin when she softly asks "do you have anything to talk about?" "what do you mean?" "well, we always seem to have something going on, but you...you never complain. how are you holding up?"
she becomes a little concerned when they don't answer straight away but gives them time. mc sighs, "i'm alright. you said it yourself, we just have a lot to do. don't need to worry about me."
anisa frowns, "hey." mc looks up at her confused. "you worry about me all the time. if you're struggling with...anything, i want you to be able to come to me."
they smile a little at her worry, thankful that she's here but "really, anisa, it's nothing i'm not used to. actually, i'm pretty sure i've been having it easier than usual. back on earth i...i had a lot more people to take care of and coming to me, so, there's nothing here i can't manage."
"but even then, didn't you ever take some time for yourself or get angry or drained?" anisa asks. she thought it was a simple question, one that would lead to an "of course." but mc tenses and fidgets with their hands instead, their lips pursed.
"mc..." they don't immediately look up at her. it's only when they go to look up at the ceiling as they try to blink away tears that anisa notices what she's done. but a sound between a whimper and sob escapes them and she doesn't hesitate before pulling them against her, "it's okay, hey, it's alright. i'm here now."
"i'm just...so tired, anisa." "i know, baby," she holds and kisses their head, pulling their face into the crook of her neck. "you deserve a break."
"i can't take a break from anything, though. this isn't—this is just...my life. it always has been." anisa's heart wrenches at their words. she holds them tighter and shakes her head, "that's not fair to yourself. you can take a break from life when you want to. it'll still be there when you're ready for it."
"and i"—anisa lifts their head to gently wipe their tears away—"will be there every step of the way."
she continues, "can you promise me something though?" mc furrows their brows but nods slowly. "will you promise to tell me if you feel this way again? that when i ask how your day was, you won't hide from me? even if it's just saying you're tired instead of good."
mc wipes at their face but nods confidently this time. anisa smiles gently before pulling them into her chest again and planting a kiss on their head, "thank you. i think after i get you some water, it's time for us to take a nap."
rime
rime knows what it's like—being selfless to the point of your own destruction
that's why it was so easy for him to watch mc give up their time for the others over and over again, all while shutting themself inside the rest of the time to work. pushing and pushing and pushing, it seemed. it annoyed him. maybe an older version of him would have found it agitating because they seemed to have no flaws. but now he stared at them, frustrated because they never seemed to stop and care about themself
and mc notices his own change in attitude, despite it all. he sits on the foot of their bed and they ask "rime, are you alright?" his lip twitches, "i don't know, are you?"
"you've been quieter lately. tired?" mc takes a moment before responding, "i mean, yeah. but that's just because i want to focus and work hard."
rime only presses further, "your practice was hard today, wasn't it?" "mm, it was alright. i'm just a little sore." "and dinner? you got it for everyone even though the rest of your day was shitty? instead of asking someone else?"
he squints at mc's confused expression while standing to face them. they tilt their head, "what are you—i offered to do it. everyone was tired."
"why?" "what?" "why do you keep pushing yourself to do more when you don't need to?"
the both of them stand in silence while mc gapes. rime speaks quieter, "what? surely you've noticed by now, mc. even i have."
they continue stare before looking away and licking their lips, trying to think of what to say. "that's just what i do. what do you want me to say?" rime takes a step towards them, "i want you to say the truth."
"th—okay. i help people. i offer to help all the time because they need help and i care about them. and sometimes...it's tiring. i get drained but i do it anyways. okay?" "alright. let us help you then. that's fair, isn't it?"
mc can only manage to laugh a little in denial while they begin to tear up, "i don't need help, rime—" "yes you do. everyone needs help. and even if you didn't need it, you want it, don't you?"
he stares, but it isn't a hard or mean gaze. it's like he's looking into mc, and their mouth settles into a grim line
"you're tired, mc. more tired than you should be," he says. and he knows he's clicked in their head when tears finally begin to fall. he finally reaches them, wrapping his arms around them while they grip onto the back of his shirt. "i know it's hard...caring so much. you need to give yourself a break, sweetheart."
they shake their head against his chest, ever so stubborn, "no, no, i—rime, people need me—"
he cuts them off, "nobody needs you enough for you to break yourself like this. and i need you"—rime cups their face and makes them look at him—"to choose yourself for once. i'm not going to sit here and watch you fall apart."
his gaze softens even more as he wipes the tears from their face, "being kind is one of your strongest traits, angel. you need to be the same for yourself."
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manjiropie · 3 years ago
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do whatever is in your mind.
Young Mikey x Reader!
Warn! no warnings today! enjoy!
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It's not often Mikey and I have a quarrel. We do bicker here and there, but that's what happens between friends, right?
I've joined Toman for almost a year now– although I've known Manjiro for much longer. I met him through Emma, who is a big friend of mine for as long as I can remember. She was there for me at times when I felt like there was no exit, no light. She's an extremely important part of my life– of me.
I've come to realize that I have been spending more and more time near Mikey, which is not bad, I do enjoy his presence. He may look tough and intimidating but he's just like a mochi: freezing cold on the outside but melting saccharine inside. Now that I'm a part of the gang and actually get to know and participate, I've gotten closer to him. Here and there Mikey invites me out.
"So, it's like a date?" I'd smirk suggestively at him.
"In your dreams." He'd try to hide his smile and he'd look away.
However, there are a few little habits he has that tend to send me on a rage trip. I get mad easily. Things will likely set on fire quickly. It's not that I want to, but my mother is not one of the most patient people in the world and she tells me to cool down. As if.
This last week was the cherry on top.
Mikey had crossed the line. He had pissed me off in every single way possible. He pretended not to listen to me while he was eating. He would answer me in a "oh, I don't really fucking care about what you're talking about!" way. He tripped while he was laughing hysterically at something Draken had said and his pink lemonade was all over my white shirt. He drew in an assignment that was due to the next day for my math class. He told me off for no reason at all in front of everyone in the last Toman's meeting... all of that wasn't on purpose. I am aware of how incredibly short his attention spam is when it comes to not so important affairs. But, fuck, couldn't he just be a little nicer to me? At least during last week where I was having sharp cramps in my fucking uterus? Yeah, maybe he didn't know that because I try not to be so obvious. But when he told us we'd be training last thursday I almost laid on the ground in fetal position and cried for hours. I didn't! I fought and then went home and cried.
Then, this Saturday– today –he invited me to his house to hang out. Emma was with a friend and his grandfather was out of town. When he called me to his house we never did much. We'd watch TV, hang out on the couch discussing stupid stuff, we'd be on our phones... nothing so wow. It was still fun, though.
I wasn't in the best mood to leave my comfy bed but I was way less in the mood to fight him off over the phone. So I slid out of the bed and dressed the first jeans I saw laying on the end of my bed and the oversized Nirvana shirt hanging off my chair (it's actually my dad's shirt, shhh).
~
I knocked twice on his bedroom's door.
"Come in." He yelled from inside. I open the door and he's laying on the bed, his head hanging off of it and his hair is almost touching the floor. His face lit up and he rolled over so he laid on his stomach. I walk over and sit down beside him.
"What's up with the frown?" I didn't notice I was frowning to be honest. Guess the bad mood followed me here.
I shrug.
"Ugh, don't tell me you're in a bad mood." He whines. "I called you here to chill and you're already angry. What's up?" He lays on his pillow and swings his legs to place them on my lap. I huff and shove them off, getting up.
"You've been treating me like shit the whole week and now you wanna chill?" I say, more calm than I thought.
"I did not treat you like shit this week? When do I treat you like shit?" His tone was one of disbelief and confusion.
"Ah, Mikey. Embarrassing me in front of the rest of gang; spilling your drink on my school shirt, which is now stained; ignoring me or answering like you're bored..." I list them off on my fingers. "I am the one who asks, what's up with you?! God, you're always being so unpredictable, which is good sometimes but not like this! Not to me!"
I flop down on the couch, starting to get tired of this whole thing. Knowing Mikey, I know that he'll not lay down again.
"So you're the only one allowed to have bad days now?" He sits on the edge of his bed and I turn my head around lazily, uninterested, bored, like him.
"You were laughing incredibly loud with Takemitchi and Draken friday."
"You can be so annoying sometimes."
"Oh, I'm the annoying one now?" I stand up.
"If you don't like my company, why did you even come in first place?" He also stands. We don't have much height difference, but he's hardly two inches taller than me.
His voice is calm, like always. Which makes me infuriated. "Fucking hell! Does it hurt for you to apologize!?" My sudden outburst takes him on surprise, and me, too.
"I already apologized, stop whining about it."
"I'm not whining–"
"If you weren't," he walks to his desk and sets a cup that was once beside his bed down. "You would've dropped this matter before."
"You don't give a damn about what I feel, do you, Mikey?"
"What?" He turns around, brows knit together.
"You heard me. You made me have a bad week and the least you could do is apologize, you dumbass!" I stomp to his direction.
"I already did! Why don't you–"
"Shut up or I'll punch you." I say, slightly looking up.
His eyebrows twitch and he slowly tilts his head to the side, like a puppy. "Or what.. ?"
"Are you fucking deaf?" I point to my ears.
He comes a little closer. "You're gonna do what if I don't shut up?"
"I'm going to punch you if you don't stop being a brat." I sneer at him. My blood boiling. The stress from this shitty past week overflowing in that moment.
"Oh, yeah?" I could feel his breath oh my nose.
"What? Are you doubting me? I would." I jerk up an eyebrow. I've never fought physically with him. But it's not like I can't.
"I'd like to see you try." His eyes flicker to my lips for a brief second and my breath fails, making me cough.
"What? Can't punch me?" He amuses.
"Fuck you."
Suddenly I feel an arm sneak around my waist and in a second I'm chest to chest with Mikey. My eyes widen– his were peaceful as ever, although superior.
"Do it." He says, looking down at me.
The way he's holding me is making my head spin. True, Mikey is cute...
"Do what?"
He laughs at my confused expression. "I don't know... what did you say you'd do to me?"
Ha ha.
His hold on me tightens.
"Do whatever is on your mind." He says.
My eyes roam free between his eyes and his soft pink lips. Do whatever is on your mind.
If he knew what was on my mind, would he still allow me to?
"Do it," he encourages me once again, "aren't you the 'oh so brave' one? Punch me, yell at me, do whatever you want to me."
Those words were the last push I needed. My hands find the soft skin of his neck, hidden by his long hair. I pull him close and lock our lips together. I feel him making a little sound, I don't know if it was surprise or relief.
If by just looking at it his lips seemed soft, actually touching it felt like kissing cotton candy or guessing cloud shapes.
He didn't pull back, in fact, he held me with both hands. I have no clue how he did that but it seemed as though all of my worries dissipated as we kissed.
My heart was beating so fast that it made my chest hurt. My head started to pound when I spent a little too long without air. I pull back from his lips and keep my gaze on them as I breathe heavily.
"Hm." He hums quietly, almost dreamily if you'd ask me.
I look up at his face and smile a bit, noticing how his cheeks are pink. I lift an eyebrow up as if asking what he was thinking. He shakes his head and then puts his right hand on my cheek, caressing it. He kisses me again. This time is slower. As though being present in the moment. As if it were just me and him and nothing else.
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I hope you guys liked It! It was so pleasant writing this out of the small bits of ideas that I have. Don't forget: my requests are open. You can request anything! Thank you for reading! Oh, likes and reblogs help a lot! If you consider following it'd make me even happier <3
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bonnymori · 3 years ago
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𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐲
Word count: 2760+ (i'll try to keep bigger lengths such as this one!)
Synopsis: You meet a new classmate who's working along Nanami, you think he's fun to be around, it stands the same to him about you. Later, feelings unravel.
Contents/Warnings: (1) Itadori Yuuji x gn!reader (2) FLUFF, TONS OF FLUFF - and some comfort (3) With the small participation of... Ino Takuma!! I really like him too, that's why <33333 (4) This is pretty platonic, but also not? (5) Ending turned sorta cliché... but I liked it u.u
A/N: This boy made me run rampant... to fhe point it's not single attraction anymore I just wish him happiness (smh if only my parents knew...) also next post will be Toji's fic pt. 2! Y'all see the first part is almost reaching 100 kudos????? I'M SO HAPPY EHSODJWKDKSJD- thanks for all the new followers and the support!! <33
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Ever since his fake death, Itadori has been training alone with the help of Gojo - and now, he works along a freshly new face, who belongs to a senior, founds out ex-salaryman named Nanami Kento. He's far a thousand times more strict than Gojo. Itadori doesn't really likes the change, because Nanami is a person he can't get along. This whole guy's appearance scream "work 4 life"; he has proved different, now he screams "work is shit - but I gotta do it because others won't".
They've just finished cleansing the outside of a movie theater off a few curses, when Itadori hears shouting from far behind them. Two figures approach, waving excessively. He quickly picks on Nanami's tired sigh beside him.
"Nanami! We figured out you'd be here! Our mission has been finished and we wanted to catch up to have lunch together!" A male clad in a full black outfit shouts, he has brown hair and a beanie on top of his head, looking quite content.
The other person simply trots next to him in silence, approaching with a friendly smile. They notice Itadori faster than the male, smile widening and quickly waving hello, suddenly eager to reach up to them. The gesture makes the pink haired boy perk up, curious to why the other person looked so joyful. His question is easily answered, when they tug on the man's sleeve and motion to him.
"Ino, we have a third buddy!" The dude looks at him with widened eyes. "So nice to meet you, I'm Y/N L/N! It's great to see new faces around!"
Itadori smiles at your energy, knowing already he would click with you very well.
"I'm Ino Takuma, sorry for not noticing you before! Your uniform looks cool." Itadori exchanges a few compliments with Ino, before the man turns to talk with Nanami, leaving him and you together.
"Yes! I'm Sukuna's vessel, Itadori Yuuji-desu! My type of woman is Jenn-"
You turn to him. "So, are you a first year?"
"Geh? Weren't you dead though?!"
"I was!- I am!- Please keep secret."
"Okay!"
"Ahem." Nanami coughs, drawing attention. "I requested you two to not come after me today. Itadori here is the reason why."
"That's no problem, we're very capable of keeping secrets." You threw your arm over Itadori's shoulder, him nodding along with you.
"Oh really, then remember to keep quiet about it. I'll let this slide." The group of students nervously at Nanami's intimidating tone. "But, I'll get to have my break alone."
"Gah!" Ino exclaimed, watching Nanami walk away; he also left the responsability of taking care of Itadori for you two, leaving without a word. "It really had to be today, when Nanami would take us to his favorite bakery..."
"Crybaby." You teased. "Itadori here can't go outside where anyone can see him, he's dead. So, we were to order food either way because he shouldn't be left out."
"Augh okay, it would be unfair."
"So, where are you staying Itadori?"
"At Gojo's state!"
"Whoa, I've never been there before." Ino commented, waiting as you sent a message to Ijichi to pick them up.
"He's my teacher, a very cool one!"
"I imagine! Ooookay, once we get there I'll get the food."
Itadori felt as his chest would burst of excitement, finally there was people around him again, he couldn't be less happy about it.
"Sharing is caring!"
Itadori laughed as you wrestled with Takuma for some fries, netflix long forgotten in the background, as watching the banter was way more entertaining. Most of the time, Ino rambled a lot about Nanami, while he rambled a lot about Gojo. The guy even showed him the cool scar under his beanie. He felt kinda upset after explaining the exchange was just temporary, his stay under Nanami's wing wasn't decisive, and therefore, he was more like a classmate than a partner.
Itadori also learned a lot about you. He was surprised to find out that you, although energetic, was the one to speak the lesser in conversations. His surprisement grew even bigger when you told him you're a exchange student from Kyoto, arriving Tokyo about the same month as him - thankfully, you were to say for good.
Conversations flowed easily in the air, until a voice from the doorway barged in.
"Yuuji-kun! Don't forget about your lessons! Hi kids! Bye kids!" Gojo said playfully, throwing the familiar punching bear to Itadori before leaving.
"What's this thing?" Ino asked.
"It's to help me control my cursed energy. So while I watch the movies, if I don't charge it with cursed energy it punches me square in the face. I thought I had mastered this thing already, but he insist I keep training with it." Itadori grumbles.
"At least it's cute." You commented, taking a sip of your drink.
"Until it punches you in your face without warning!" The pink haired boy barks.
The talks died down, the three of you eating quietly when another movie is played on the screen. Itadori didn't bother reading the title, it was a plain one about a zombie apocalypse that got him extremely bored, yet he kept watching still so the plushie didn't punch him in the face again; he's been keeping a record since all his last cursed energy training lessons were a sucess to this day. When his head started nodding and eyelids dropping Itadori can't remember well, about fourty five minutes of movie perhaps? Make it fifty, the second slumber took over his body completely.
When he awoke once again, it was near midnight, the clock on the wall told him so. He also noticed a soft and warm surface supporting his head, figures, it's your shoulder he's resting into, he feels an arm around his own shoulders and your cheek placed upon his hair.
"Hey, it's late." You immediately notices he's awake, calling out softly. "You should sleep on your room, or something, better to your spine."
He chuckles when you poke his side. "But I'm comfortable here."
"I'm surprised, you just met me today, and now is sleeping on my shoulder."
"I'm not, that happens often to me."
"Sleeping on people's shoulders?"
"No! Making friends quickly." Itadori likes your gentle warmth, your hug, everything makes him feel at home. "I met two more people before you for two weeks, but they can't see me, because I'm dead."
"So I'll keep you company, that's my new mission."
His eyes widen at that, a oh so little blush covering the tip of his ears.
"For how many time I slept anyway?" He asks.
"About two- no, three hours. You missed two movies, and this one is about to end."
"And you stayed here the whole time?" He motions to your shoulder.
"Yep. That reminds me I gotta pee."
Itadori grumbles, but quickly lifts himself off you, respecting your needs. That gives him some time to look around, he notices Ino is gone, and the plushie sits quietly at the other side of the couch, unmoving.
"Y/N! How did you manage to make it quiet down?" He's beyond bafflet.
"...que."
"What!"
"I said!" You arrive quickly at the doorframe, hands still wet from when you washed them. "I used my innate technique."
"Oh! How is it like?"
"It's kinda funny, gimme a moment." You left to wipe off your hands, coming back in a second. "So, just like Shoko, I produce reverse curse energy, but it's quite different than hers, I can't heal people. That's why we often call it positive energy instead. I can use it to soothe off negative energy, so the bear has no cursed energy right now."
"How does it works on people?" He felt very curious about everything, asking away like a kid.
"Since everyone has negative energy, it just makes you sleepy really. But when it comes to curses it's really practical, I can either weaken it or, if the curse is like grade three or four, I can slap them off existence completely by wiping all their energy." You were naturally proud of having a such versatile power, your own energy swirling with pride around you.
"That sounds amazing! Is it why I fell asleep though?"
"Nah, only if I did it on purpose. I guess you were just tired, hope you don't mind I decided to let you rest today."
"No way, it was a good nap."
You nodded. "By the way, Ino left to attend to a drinking party, he paid for our food."
"Drinking? Is he old?"
"Yeah, he's twenty." You chuckled, already expecting that kind of reaction.
"No way! He looks young just like us!"
"That's totally my reaction after I learned he's twenty!"
After that day, you started visiting Itadori weekly to daily, after exchanging numbers he made a little group with you and Ino, naming it the "Nanami trio". But really, he exchanges more texts with you in private, be them memes, cool images he wish to share, etcetera. Although, Ino wasn't left excluded, he ofter brough his xbox to connect to Itadori's tv room and you all would spend hours playing together; he just didn't spend much time with both of you as much. And that was okay.
For a few days, your connection with Itadori died down when he didn't reply to your texts. They would remain unread for some time, the longest being half a day, until he would spam apologies then move on with the topic. That became a routine until one day when you came over to check on Itadori unnanounced, needin to ease off your worries about the boy, only to find him sobbing in the middle of a hallway, staring ahead and beyond, his back to you.
"Ita-?"
"Egh!" Startled, he scrambled to wipe his eyes, turning to you. "H-hey, um, hi."
"What happened?"
"I- he-" His eyes didn't met yours, knuckles white in a death grip. You notice he has a few bandages thrown over his face and arms. The way his shoulders are drawn, as if he wants to shrink into himself is something you've experienced before.
"Something hard to talk about?"
He nods almost immediately, head still facing down.
"It's alright, come with me." You reach for his hands, grimacing slightly when his forceful grip is now on your hand, yet you don't comment on it. He follows you through the state wordlessly.
You two stop on the same tv room, sitting down on the couch. You then guide his head to your shoulder, gently massaging his scalp with the free hand.
"It's alright."
Those two words are chanted like a prayer for the next half hour, at some point, Itadori twisted his body towards yours and unknowingly caged you between him and the sofa arm. He embraced you with a force you didn't have in you, like he didn't want to lose one another. Painful or not, not a muscle moved on your body. He needed a shoulder to cry on.
Thirty minutes passed like seconds, you peered down only to find the boy confortably napping against your bosom; at some point you just became the cold side of the pillow to him. That's alright. It brings you joy to be the mom friend anyways. So you decided to join the sleepland aswell, arms still secured around his shoulders and the back of his head.
It feels like the nap hasn't been long, though, because you can feel Itadori's grip loosening and therefore, you're awake.
"Sorry if I broke any bones, in advance."
"Wow, and you only warn me now."
He laughs at your comeback, hands still secured around your waist.
"I'm surprised you let me uh, cuddle you for comfort - and sleep. I don't understand it? You just make me sleepy." He rambled, keeping eye contact with you while his head still rests on your chest.
"That's a piece of cake when you have younger siblings who seek for you every night they get a nightmare."
"Does that mean I can come to you again if I have a nightmare?" There it is, his togepi-kirby cutesy face.
"Are you four?"
"That's mean!" Itadori blushed, squeezing you on his arms. "I like the contact. It puts me at ease."
"Mm, do you want to talk about it?"
He gulped. "No, not really."
Your peach haired friend remained silent, and so did you. It seems he doesn't intend in letting you go soon, or he just really forgot to mention it. It gives them time to think, your younger sisted used to do that sometimes, back in Kyoto.
"Y/N, wanna watch anything?"
"Sure, have you watched Parasyte before?"
"No, let's give it a try then!" Itadori glances at the remote, then back at you - making you confused over his hesitation to move. He notices you noticed it, chuckling nervously. "To be honest, I don't wanna let go."
"It's hurting my back."
"SORRY I'M SORRY!" He jumped away from you like a cat would jolt away from a cucumber, making you snicker.
"It's okay, I just wanted to change positions."
And to tease you, but he didn't need to know that part.
He glared at you with a small pout, typing the initials of Parasyte on the search bar. Outside his line of vision, you were grinning like a idiot, his sweeteness took a tow on you. All the people of Tokyo you met really held a way different spirit from your classmates in Kyoto, Itadori being the nicest of all. It's surprising him being Sukuna's vessel to begin with; being honest, you felt drawn by it.
"Y/N, it's startiiiiing." He cut your daydreaming short, slumping on your side and propping his head on your shoulder.
"This again?" You throw an arm around his shoulders, very much like the first time he cuddled himself on you.
"Don't blame me, you're the one who wanted to change positions. Guess I'll just make some alterations since I'm awake this time!" One of his arms went behind your back and circled your waist, hand resting at your hip.
"It's definely different, since the other time you drooled on me."
"Hhgh, okay okay! Let me enjoy this." For perhaps the actual first time, you're able to watch without exchanging words with one another.
And this time, it's you who's head loll to the side, nose buried on his soft rose perfumed hair. Itadori doesn't comment on it yet, his free hand moves under your legs to lift your whole body up efortlessly when he senses you have fallen asleep.
"I remember you said it's bad for my spine, I wouldn't mind it... yours however."
The boy makes a beeline to the guest room, he sighs when there is no choice but open the door with his foot. Inside, he places you carefully in the soft bed.
Before he could leave, a hand reaches up for his sleeve.
"Itadori," He turned, looking at you. "Make me company?"
He giggles softly - you think it sounds like a highschool girl. "You should start calling me by my first name!" Itadori rambles as he climbs on the bed, arms wrapping around your waist in a motion you're familiar with.
"Yuuji, I'm tired, let me sleep."
"But I wanna talk more..." He pouts. "Also, are we, um, dating?"
You wriggle around, bringing his head down to peck on his forehead, teasing. "Correction, I want to date you."
"Uh, oh." A blush coats his face so quickly, you'd say someone dumped a bucket of red paint on his face.
"Is that a no?"
"No!"
"So it is a no."
"Christ, will you stop teasing for a second, I'm trying to talk here." He makes an angry version of his togepi-kirby face, you can't help but grin.
"You amuse me, but okay. I'll do it for you."
"Thanks." He blinks, the blush slowly fading away. "You know, I lied, not about the contact, I like the contact nonetheless-"
His hand moves to play with yours, such as tapping his tips against yours, or meassuring the palms.
"-it's you who brings me comfort."
It's also your turn to blush, that line was seriously charming.
"Yeah."
"Yeah?"
"Yes, we're dating now." You respond, a little eagerly. "Can I kiss you?"
"Please."
This is the best person I could ask for, Itadori thinks, keeping his eyes open as yours shut during the kiss, whom I won't change for anything else in this world.
When you both separate, Itadori feels drowsy and sleepy. His face fits perfectly on your shoulder as always.
"Goodnight, my favorite person."
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sunseteyes · 4 years ago
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FLUFFVEMBER DAY 12: ATSUMU MIYA
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prompt: couple’s quiz (prompts are by @jojosmilktea)
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word count: 1,766 words | themes: gen!reader. youtuber!reader. fLUFF. i got carried away but this is pretty domestic honestly.
tags: @kacchanori @chickynn @todominica @sparkleswritings @brinthie @patricia-ceballos @giyuus-wife @bitchtrynafck @astrxrism @animatedarchives @deephasoceanmagic @strawberrysalwa (send a dm/ask to be added!)
rv: i know i did say atsumu’s love language here is different but love languages can change especially when you’re already in a relationship. i actually answered the quiz this time in atsumu’s perspective and it’s very difficult but yeah it has to happen lmao. i pretty much agree with the results and yes don’t take it so seriously because i’m not atsumu himself and well this is just from my own perspective, hopefully it was close enough to his character. special mention to my honey @liliannyah nia i’m tagging you here because i know you’ll be simping on tsum tsum here ya go hun
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✒︎ love language
mornings with atsumu are peaceful. afternoons are full of fun, and well evenings are the best. that's usually because; around these times are when atsumu is at his best and most positive energy throughout the day.
however for you, you had a schedule beforehand and you have plans on how to spend your day, and it's with atsumu.
"hey babe, can you film with me today?" you situated yourself by the doorway of your shared bedroom, seeing the dirty blonde specks of his hair peaking under the blankets that was covering his body, the rays of light coming from the sun, escaping the gaps from the thin fabric of the curtains by your window. you wanted him to rest as much as he can since he doesn't usually have cancelled trainings, however this is also the best time for you to bond with him more, and you've got the perfect idea for that in your mind.
all he need to do is wake up and-
"i want to sleep." atsumu's voice overcomes the silence, however muffled it was. a frown forms on your lips as you made your way next to the bed, pulling the covers from his form just for him to groan and try to pull it back.
"i want to sleep, (y/n). five more minutes." he has his eyes closed as the fringes of his hair tried to protect them from the brightness of the surroundings, even from you.
atsumu must have felt the bed dip as you sat on his side, his brows furrowing at the faintness of your touch when you reached out to brush his strands away from his handsome face. you grazed lightly on his forehead, removing the sweat that must have formed due to the warmth that summer brought to the temperature.
your frown curls upwards as you admired how atsumu leans onto your hand, even for just a second. you skimmed your hand on your shirt before leaning forward and faced atsumu with an arm supporting your head on the pillow.
"you have to wake up, tsumu. i've got breakfast ready." you sang to him gently, still looking at his face with awe and wonder. most of the time, you question yourself how you got a guy like this. in those silent moments where you just feel so lucky how someone like atsumu miya could love someone like you.
"you're looking at me like that again."
you were broken from your trance as you were met by his gaze, not even looking at you before he said those words.
"what is it?" he breathes out as he closed his eyes again, now snuggling his way towards your form. you sighed and brushes his hair again, feeling out its softness despite the fact that it was dyed and it should be dry under your touch if it weren't for how atsumu takes very good care for it.
"come on, tsumu. the food will get cold." you say, only to feel him slide his arms by your waist, pulling you closer to him, embracing you even.
however no matter how much you liked it, you pushed him away, "tsumu! we're going to film today, wake up!" you whined, prying away from his grasp.
"film?" his face brightens up in almost an instant, his eyelids opening at the same time. "we? you said we?"
you smile at his reaction, relaxing and nodding your head. "yeah, i did, i literally said it five minutes ago. don't you want to?"
"of course i do!" he sits up, an evident pout on his lips. "why didn't ya say so? y'know how long i've been waiting for this day. i don't really get why you keep me from yer subscribers if you loved them so much."
you sat up as well, grinning in amusement. "you really like the attention, do you?"
"wha-? no i don't."
"oh my dear tsumu, you do." you giggle and climbed out of the bed. "come on let's eat first. i already set up everything so we can film right after eating."
time passes by and before you know it, you and atsumu were already in front of the camera, the lights not bothering you anymore with how you were so used to having them around you. atsumu also seemed to be in the similar situation and was much more comfortable with where he was situated, as if this was his moment.
after all, you made him wait for a long time before finally deciding to show him in front of the whole world.
“is this live?”
you nod at him, “yeah, are you nervous?”
“huh-me, nervous? ‘course not.” he scoffs but as you poke his chest and stopped there for awhile, you gave him a smirk, to which he merely slaps your hand away and pouts away.
“hello there! how’s everyone?” you immediately smile at the camera, your laptop showing the bountiful of comments that spams in an instant. you could see atsumu’s reflection on the screen, his grin wide and slightly bit awkward, but it’s not what your fans are commenting about.
“uh-so you guys probably guessed who our guest is.” you smirk, glancing sideways at atsumu. “and yes, he’s my boyfriend. say hello, tsumu.”
atsumu was a natural as he introduces himself on the screen, a welcoming smile on his face, as if he had been filming for a vlog as long as you do and that he was completely adjusting with the situation. you couldn’t help but curve your lips upwards in turn, nodding off eventually at whatever he was saying.
“so! today we, me and atsumu are going to answer a quiz in front of everyone.”
“a quiz?”
“yep! a couple’s quiz.” you purposely didn’t inform atsumu beforehand what you will do and you explained it on the screen as all the attention turns to you.
“what? you scared, tsumu?” you teased him and he juts his lower lips as a reaction.
“‘course not. i’m gonna answer each of them like a pro.”
you laughed heartily as you grabbed your phone, handing atsumu out his at the same time. “me and atsumu are going to answer a couple’s love language quiz and compare our love languages. you guys can answer with us if you like, just search it up on your search engines,” leaning forward, you muttered with “i’m not gonna tell the site coz y’know this is not really a sponsored video.”
your hand suddenly found itself on top of atsumu’s as you explain the five love languages briefly, feeling his gaze on yours despite not looking at him directly. you have no idea if he was paying attention with your ramblings but if he’s busy admiring you, you’re too humble to even think about it.
or not.
“so, are you ready tsumu?” he was cut off of his trance and he pretends he was alright when he smiles in the camera and answers enthusiastically.
“but what if i like both?”
“there’s no option for both tsumu.”
“but i like hugging you and receiving letters. remember when you confessed to me with a-“
your hand immediately shoots up to his mouth and he chuckles in delight in the victory of having to tease you in front of your fans. by now you’re wondering if you should regret having atsumu for the first time in your vlog in live.
“these questions are really difficult.” you say, finding yourself stuck into yet again an array of indecisiveness.
“where are you already?”
“i’m at 23%” you answer, glancing up at atsumu. “‘bout you?”
“30%,” he says, shooting an eye at the camera. “(y/n)’s really slow especially when answering these types of quizzes. they’re that indecisive.”
“what-“
“i’m the decisive one in this relationship. that’s why i have to always ask them three hours before our date which place they would like to eat at.”
you gave up on reprimanding atsumu as you focused on your questionnaire, picking an answer as atsumu chats with your fans who commented about how they noticed about it too.
“see? your fans agree to me. we’re already best of friends.”
you shook your head as you found yourself grinning from atsumu’s words.
“oh- a back rub seems nice.” you heard him mutter later on and when you glanced at him, he was not looking at you but you could tell with how he gripped on his shoulders that he’d need one sooner or later after the film.
it was not unusual for you to massage him every once in awhile, or maybe more than that. that habit actually started way before you two had gotten together and he always told you how you’re good with your hands. he admitted one morning after some time of being officially a couple that he liked your massages a lot.
atsumu finishes the quiz first before you and he takes the initiative of talking with your fans as you finish up yours. you laugh along with them every time atsumu attempts to make a joke and read along the lines of the comments section.
“yay i’m done!”
atsumu turns to you with a “took you long enough” but he places a hand by your knee, his attention now on yours. “so, what did you get?”
“my highest is quality time!” you leaned to the camera lens as you showed your results to the screen, making sure that you were able to really make it visible. “followed by receiving gifts and physical touch. how about you, ‘tsumu? what’d you get?”
he places his phone next to yours before he answers with a bright smile. “i got the same too! looks like me and (y/n) are real meant to be, don’t you think?”
you could feel your cheeks burn especially when he pulls his phone away and reaches out to your side just to place his hand on your waist, keeping it there like a protective and proud boyfriend he is. you were speechless for awhile and it was a good thing that atsumu led the conversation on in your silence. whether it was intentional or not, that you didn’t know.
but now that you realized it, atsumu and you had the same results most probably because both of you wanted to spend more time and moments like this with each other. sooner than later, he’ll be busy with trainings again and you with your vlogs.
feeling that familiar sense of radiance in your chest, you leaned your head on atsumu’s shoulders, once again feeling lucky to have him by your side, even with the littlest of times.
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changeling-rin · 5 years ago
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It's fairly easy to tell with most of the guys, but I've been wondering: what kinds of things are Lore afraid of? How does he react when he's forced to face those things?
Oh!  @ask-the-dimensional-links did a thing on this!  Give me a minute, I’ll go and dig up that post- 
Click Here To Read It
Also, I went back through my message history and found the original thoughts I sent them regarding that Ask in the first place.  However, it is long, and I have recently figured out how to stop spamming people with novel-length posts, so!  The LONG answer shall be under the cut ;)
(But if you don’t want to read the whole thing I’ll put Lore’s in bold so you can just skip to it)
((For greatest fears… well, honestly I’ve only addressed this a couple times, because most of my interpretation of being the Holder of Courage means that said Holder isn’t afraid of a ton of stuff. That said, I have tried to give each Link something that they ARE afraid of, if only because Courage also means overcoming your fear and doing the thing anyway. I probably haven’t mentioned them all in-story because not all of them came up through natural events or dialogue, but hey, now I can!  Gen is afraid of spiders. I did this because, in his game, they’re freaking enormous and have a nasty habit of dropping out of absolutely flipping nowhere, landing on his head, and proceeding to try and eat him then and there. Granted, the spiders in Twilight Princess can be equally large, but you can usually see them coming. Plus, Dusk has very sharp teeth and that quick-time event thing with Midna and her magic, so he’s much better equipped to take them out swiftly whereas Gen has to stab the thing and usually get spider guts on himself too.Speck worries about getting stepped on. One of the very first things he learned about being small is that almost nobody pays attention to you, and they certainly don’t pay attention to where they’re walking. Most of the time he uses this to his advantage, like his fighting style. But he always makes sure to keep to corners and to walk in places where he can’t easily be spotted, because getting crushed to death by an unobservant human sounds absolutely terrifying.The Four don’t like being alone. It’s something that’s developed more in relation to the more time they spend together; there’s something really intimate about sharing thoughts the way they do, and they’re a little bit worried about how they’re going to handle it all when they have to put the Four Sword back. To them, noise means people and people mean life and warmth and laughter and a bunch of other good stuff. Their hive-mind means that they’ve always got each other, but especially now that they’ve gotten used to having ten-plus siblings around, being alone just sounds so… lonely.Ocarina is scared that he can’t measure up. It’s a lot of pressure, to take a nine-year-old boy and tell him, “Hey, you gotta save the world.” Now, though, he’s in a body that he’s still getting used to (he never had the opportunity to grow into it, after all), and there’s a future version of himself hanging around who’s confident and cocky and everything Ocarina’s not. He’s afraid that Mask might look at him one day and say, ‘You’ll never be me. You’re not enough.’ Common sense, of course, tells him that this is obviously never going to happen, because otherwise that would be a massive paradox and plus Mask just isn’t that kind of person, but fear isn’t exactly rational.Mask got over that whole inferiority thing a looooong time ago, but now he’s got a new issue: he can’t stand being left behind. Not in the kind of ‘You’re too slow’ way, but in the 'people move on without him’ way. It started when Princess Zelda sent him back to his child years (without actually consulting him on it, might I add), and suddenly here he is with all these memories surrounded by all these people who have no idea what he’s been through. Mask would have much rather continued as he was, with the people who shared the experience with him. Then Navi left, for reasons he’s still trying to figure out, and he literally left the country and went to a new one searching for her. This is part of the reason why he resonates with the Skull Kid; they’ve both got the same fear.Neither of them are very fond of Dead Hands, though.  Dusk doesn’t like losing people - at all. He’s so protective that the idea of one of the people he values getting hurt terrifies him. After all, what did he do when his adoptive brother got kidnapped? (That’s Colin, by the way.) And what did he do when Colin nearly got tossed off a bridge by King Bulblin? He went nuts on the guy. Same thing when Speck almost got crushed. He’s a wolf, and the pack means everything to him. He’s going to fight until he literally can’t anymore to keep anything from happening to his family.Vio, Blue, Red, and Green each have a diluted version of Link’s original fear, because they’re one personality split across four bodies. Basically, Link hates being the person who screwed up. The reason that Vaati is free in the first place was because he drew the Four Sword, breaking the seal and letting the sorcerer loose. (If you’d like, the Blue in him outweighed the Vio and instead of thinking of other ways to rescue the Princess, he went for the immediate option.) In a roundabout way, the whole mess is his fault (or at least he thinks it’s his fault), and he’ll do anything to make sure it doesn’t happen again. For his four split selves, this manifests into a general desire to not be the person in the group to botch the timing on a combat plan and to have their teamwork, at least, be smoothly-running.Lore, for a while, didn’t think he had a fear. Then he met the group and he abruptly realized, that, yes, he actually does. Lore’s afraid of rejection, that one day these people that he’d come to regard as family will say 'That’s it, we’re done, you’re too weird and we can’t cope with it.’ He actually reigned himself in, at first, just a little bit, because he liked these people and he wanted to stick around and for some reason, the idea of them looking at him in apprehension and confusion the way most other people did bothered him. He’s let loose by now, obviously, because he knows that none of them are going anywhere and neither is he, but it’s just one of those things that comes up in a bad dream every once in a while and always ends with him spending the rest of the night awake.Sketch has a straight-up phobia of water. I’ve covered this one fairly in-depth in the story, I believe, so I won’t reiterate it too much. But Sketch is always going to look at the ocean differently than the rest of the group will, because The Rain Incident is never too far in his mind.Realm is secretly afraid that one day, he’s going to get lost on his way to save somebody and by the time he finally gets there it’ll be too late. Or, that he’ll lose his sword and be unable to fend off an attack, or lose his shield and be unable to defend someone. This is why he never stops trying to find whichever item he misplaced or whichever location he lost track of this time. He’s going to get there whether it takes him two weeks or not, because the alternative isn’t an option. He’s better nowadays, because somehow hanging with the group cuts his travel time by about eighty percent and he still can’t believe that it’s normal for people to get where they’re going in less than a week, but it’s awesome and he’s not complaining one bit.Wind is afraid to lose. Not exactly in the traditional sense, but more like he’s terrified of what will happen if he fails. What would have happened to Aryll if he’d failed to save her after she’d gotten kidnapped? What would have happened to Tetra if he’d failed to get her out of Ganondorf’s hands? What would happen to her now if he fails to find Bellum? And, the current one, what will happen to existence if they fail to stop Demise? (I guess he’s afraid of the Game Over scenario, heh.)Steam never says anything about it, but he sometimes sees things that nobody else does and they freak the living daylights out of him. He’s started suspecting that there’s some form of spirit world sharing the space with their physical one. He’s learned to ignore it, for the most part, although being able to see it did come in really handy when Zelda lost her body. Unfortunately, that led him to think that he’s seeing the afterlife, and that was just uncomfortable.
Shadow likes to pretend that he doesn’t have a fear and he gets away with it too, because what he’s actually afraid of never actually occurred to anybody else. Which is funny, because he’s actually really obvious about it. He doesn’t like sunlight. Kinda like Sketch and his water phobia, Shadow’s afraid of sunlight because it hurts. He’s never tempted fate to see what would happen, but judging by the smoke that starts coming off his hair he doesn’t think he wants to find out. Hence the cloak he wears, and why he’s always under a shady tree somewhere.Oni dislikes the idea of losing his legacy. He’s the very first Hero, after all, he’s gotta protect his kids. Plus, if they’re gone, who’s gonna beat up the evil that pops up all the time? He’s like the formal older brother/father who’s actually an enraged momma bear if you manage to trigger his fear.))
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(1)So I've recently come to the conclusion that I want to cut ties with my mother because she's extremely toxic and bad for my mental health. My parents are divorced and she never physically sees me (It's been 4 years) but she messages me and calls me to get angry at me if I take too long to say happy birthday or on any holiday. The majority of my childhood memories with her are all blurred out except for 2 good memories and all the times she frequently screamed at me at the top of her lungs.
(2) My mother has bpd and anger issues, so this would happen a lot over every small thing I did. It totally destroyed my confidence in asking or doing anything without checking to see if it was okay with literally everyone or to see if I could have permission first. She'd yell at me over everything if I couldn't find a certain item she wanted (and her constantly doing that made it to where whenever she'd ask me for something I'd go into panic mode and wouldn't be able to find it as a result)
(3)She'd also yell at me for not understanding my homework or when I'd accidentally hurt myself, drop something, or spill stuff. I also learned after coming out to my dad that my dad has told her he thought I was gay and that she'd vehemently deny it. She's extremely conservative as well (to the far right) and whenever I would visit her she'd spend all the time talking with my brother and I'd be in the background terrified something bad was going to happen and I'd be yelled at.
(4)To put it even more into perspective, on my birthday I took too long getting ready she and my brother left to go get yogurt and I only found out about it once I finished and came out of my room much to my dads confusion who asked why I wasn't with my mom. My entire childhood scope of her is just an amalgamation of her being violently angry and selfish. I dont want her to be in my life or to force my partner or future children to interact with her in any way. But I don't know how to cut ties.
(4) Like I said she hasn't visited for a while, but she will text me and call usually to just inform me that she's upset with me. I know if I don't pick up or respond she will go in a frenzy of angry texts and will spam my phone. I also still live with my dad (who is absolutely wonderful) so there will probably be questions directed at him or even my brother who she talks with all the time. Im 21 now and I don't know how to officially cut ties as I've never really considered it before seriously.
(5//end) but it feels like she will use my cutting her off to victimize herself and won't even hear any reasoning I have. I know for sure she is the type of person to plaster screenshots of conversations on her social media and passive-aggressively make posts if she doesn't. I don't want that but I feel like I'd owe her an explanation as to why I felt compelled to not speak with her anymore What should I do?
Sorry this took so long for me to answer, hon, and I’m really sorry you’re in this situation and that you’ve been put through so much misery. The way your mother has treated you is absolutely awful, and you’re completely right to cut her out of your life.
I’m low on spoons, so let me just relate to you my own experience: my dad walked out on me and my mom just before my 17th birthday, and I cut him out of my life. It took a few emails and texts, and he still sends me cards and tries to play the victim of the daughter who won’t ~reconcile~ with him, claims he misses his ~little girl~, but I throw away the cards and I go on with my life.
I hate my father, and I haven’t missed him even once. My life got so much better when he left and I never had to see him again. It got even better when I stopped responding to his digital communications and I stopped playing into his victimhood. Yeah, I’m sure he tells lies about me to his new family and stepchildren, he acts like he’s the poor guy whose heartless daughter won’t talk to him, but I honestly don’t give a fuck, because I don’t think about him. 
I literally don’t think about him, and that’s a freedom I wish for every child of asshole parents.
I can’t tell you the answer for how to deal with your mom bothering your brother and father, but I can tell you that whatever bullshit victimhood she pulls will be worth not having to constantly deal with her in your life. Deciding she doesn’t matter will be so fucking liberating, and you have the right to make that choice.
You don’t need to justify or reason yourself to her, you don’t owe her anything. You don’t have to argue with her or make her try to understand, you can just lay down your terms and your boundaries and enforce them. It might take practice, but you can do it. You don’t have to say happy birthday to the person who traumatized you, you don’t have to take her call or answer her texts or reply to her emails. Let her be her miserable asshole self and live your own life.
I’m not saying it won’t be hard or won’t hurt or cause problems sometimes, but I wouldn’t go back to being in contact with my father for anything. 
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douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years ago
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I'VE BEEN PONDERING RECORD
There are just two or three of you, and it will take years. If we want to get rich if the product succeeds, and get nothing if it fails. Plus in four years it will be easy to raise angel rounds about half the size of the round can even change on the fly. They dropped out of the way things are going to get replaced. But I don't think you're going to see record labels or tobacco companies using this discovery. Well, I'll tell you what tends to be missing when people lack experience. I was thinking recently how inconvenient it was not to have much power in big companies than small ones, and product development. As I was doing it I tried to imagine what a transcript of the other guy's talk would be like, and you'll probably also do a better job of presenting that aspect of your startup, and misleading them about how far along you are.
Who do I use as examples when I'm talking to companies we fund? Much of what VCs add, the acquirer would have been better for him. They're responding to the market. The interesting thing is, no one knows, including him. Why do Segways provoke this reaction? But the real costs are the ones you never hear about: the company that would be the best supplier, but doesn't bid because they can't spare the effort to get verified. The way to handle rejection is with precision. A lot of people seem to think we're on to something. Why do Segways provoke this reaction? In this model, the research department functions like a mine. But it's probably not that dangerous to start worrying too early that you're default dead, we probably need to talk about whether a startup is not like applying to college, where you can spend as long thinking about each sentence than it takes to say it.
If you're a good con artist, you'll never convince investors if you're not convinced yourself. There are no meetings or, God forbid, corporate retreats or team-building exercises. So naturally the people at the startup work a lot harder. Is the cost increasing or decreasing? The problem with not having the. Of course, someone has to take money from novice investors, or there would never be any experienced ones. You can't hire that kind of talent. My friend Trevor Blackwell is a great hacker? What does that mean for founders? Well, we humans are as conspicuously different from other animals as the anteater.
Make something people want. Which of course makes me um even more, because I find new books to read en route. Tie yourself to the mast. If you're Sam Altman, you don't really understand them. How likely are they to offer you a term sheet? More money can't get software written faster; it isn't needed for facilities, because those can now be quite cheap; all money can really buy you is sales and marketing. But only graduation rates, then you'll improve graduation rates you made classes easier. The math is brutal. Investors rarely grasp this, but much of what they're responding to when they lose interest in a startup is default alive or default dead: they assume it will have expanded to include the efforts of all the great programmers I can think of names.
But if you're looking for companies that hope to win by writing great software, but through brand, and dominating channels, and doing the right deals. Consulting Some would-be founders may by now be thinking, why deal with investors while the others keep the company going. So I think VC funds are seriously threatened by the super-angels don't like. An office environment is supposed to be the CEO. If you know what? Fred Brooks wrote about it in 1974, and the time preparing for it beforehand and thinking about it afterward. The rate at which individuals can create wealth as well as consuming your attention they undermine your morale. Whenever someone in an organization is a kind of Segway. If he wants to be on this list, he's going to be a rule with them that everything has to start with no more than an outline of what you want, you can take. I was working on spam filters I thought it would be good; you could tell from the case. I'm sure most of those who want to decrease economic inequality want to do it, why not undergrads? Really there should be two articles: one about what to do if you are yourself a programmer, and one about what to do about it.
And if there are people who could, if they can just hire enough people it somehow will be. Well, I'm now about to do that in a spectacular way: I think undergraduates are undervalued. There are always new ideas right under your nose. And when you look at the history of stone tools, technology was already accelerating in the Mesolithic. In every field, technology magnifies differences in productivity. There are startups that have succeeded despite any number of different mistakes. He'd also just arrived from Canada, and had just hired a very experienced NT developer to be their chief technical officer. He was the original author of GMail, which is one of the most powerful forces that can work on founders' minds, and attended by an experienced professional whose full time job is to buy companies, and the reactions that spread from person to person in an audience are disproportionately the more brutish sort, just as the greatest danger of being hard to sell to is not that you overpay but that the best ones actually prefer to work hard. And I've heard several hackers say that after drinking even half a beer they can't program at all. Morale is tremendously important to a startup. For example, Web-based applications are hot now, but within Microsoft there must be a lot of the company as they can in each one.
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tamiddyinyourcity · 5 years ago
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11:51pm.
Sick off sushi and tired of everything.
What's even the point anymore, dude?
Like... Getting into relationships just for them to end over the most ridiculous yet easy to resolve circumstances ever. (All you had to do was not do some dumb shit like hang out with my stalker alone in your bedroom st midnight, Patrick, or so much as help dissolve the mess you made..... But, noooo.)
Or getting to look extremely 10/10, just to go on dates with really unattractive and antisocial dudes. (I talked to Adrian about one extremely rude guy, and am still pissed at his stupid ass response. I literally told him all about a guy I met on Whatsyourprice who literally went "You're gorgeous! Very pretty. Really pretty in person. Which is funny, since your photos are so...." And then the man made extremely noisy and overexaggerating grimacing and vomiting noises toward me, in this 5 star restaurant, on the first fucking date.... when I was clearly out of his league. Adrian was like, "Well I mean, if he is paying for a date, isn't it in his right to dictate who he finds attractive or not?"..... How the FUCK do you get "Tamia thinks this man doesn't have the right to find people unattractive" from me telling you that????? If anything, the big question was, "If I was seen as so gagworthy and hideous to you from my photos, then why contact me and pay me 100 dollars just to have dinner with you????? And why think it was appropriate to do that rude ass shit.... IN A CLASSY RESTUARANT.... on a FIRST DATE... with a young woman who you couldnt have gotten *otherwise*?????)
Men are disgusting. I'm probably gonna need to see a therapist soon, my homicidal thoughts are coming back.
.....I feel calm, now that I made a vent post on my spam about the things.
Also, a relevant song.
This song sums up my wack thoughts about my most recent relationship. And the unspoken of bitch. Luckily, I never have to see either of those people, ever again.
Anyway, its 12:22am. I am calm, suddenly. Not sure why, but it's better than whatever nihilistic shit I was on half an hour ago before.
Cool things to do:
Try new restaurants that I like. I used to love doing that. And now that I have the money and free time for that, why not? It's bittersweet, knowing I did want to do something like that with my ex.... But, life goes on. Might as well try all those pizza places and gourmet restuarants I had liked.
Explore new cities. The local malls here are garbage, and I have too much free time and money on my hands to know what to do with. I don't have a girlfriend to spend it on, nor hella friends that have nearly as much free time as me, aaaaand I rarely eat as is. So, might as well plan a nice day trip to another city. Fuck around in their malls and flirt. Life is too short.
Find out what stories I should vlog about. I figure anonymous vlogging is fun, for multiple reasons. I could vlog about all my shitty Whatsyourprice dates. That time someone tried to mail me their dismembered penis on FetLife, and it got lost in the mail on the way to my buddy Pedro's house. Good times, not so good times.... Either way, sharing about my life is the fun thing about existing.
Experiment with my looks. There's literally so many looks I can pull off. Sexy dark makeup and leather/studs/spikes? Check. Preppy and innocent looks that surprise people to my actual personality? Check. Cottagecore lacy pink pieces? Check. Straight up androgynous? Attaboy! Yep, sounds good to me. I like the sounds of that! Why does talking about how much i love clothes get my clit hard
Baking goods and introducing myself to the neighbors! Because I've got nothing to lose but treats, and friends to gain. With the money I finally have, I can afford to buy all the semisweet chocolate chips and baking soda I want. I could show up to places unannounced with a basket full of cookies, straight up killin the game.
Befriend other YouTubers or content creators! This literally always ends in me dating the person I plan to create with, so aaaaactually maybe I should hold offfff...... on thaaaaaaat.........
And yeah, that seems nice. I should do that soon. :)
Now that the sun is finally coming out, there's no reason to not drink up all the sunshine that I can.
Why be sad over an ex, when I can explore the city with no bra on, eat cuties all day, and sip on mango juice while walking the shoreline or something?
Why stress out when I can now finally get my hair done, buy as many shimmer oils as I want, and enjoy a new era of hyping up other women, and being as gay and carefree and respectful as i wanna be.
Honestly, amazing.
Maybe I should get my hair braided again? Its been ages, but I miss throwing my hair around and looking all seductive with long wavy braids. I do enjoy looking like Vegeta when I get bedhead, and short hair makes it easier to be less afraid of fighting a bitch, but heeeeeey, feminine shit is cool too. :)
Things to do:
Get some new jackets for the new season. No more wearing the same coat every day, especially now that the weather is hot. And for dates too.....
Get some hot clothes. Fuck yeah. Sundresses that let my body breathe while still showing covering. Maxi dresses, flowy skirts..... a dreaaaaam.
Fuck it, spa day.
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bright-molina · 7 years ago
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Can I get a boy ship for descendants! My names Anya and I have long brown curly hair, green eyes, freckles on my nose and pretty tanned skin. I love to sing and read but my fav hobby is ballet. People underestimate my strength but I've done kick boxing even longer so I know how to defend myself. I'd like to think I was kind and confident (I always help people most would think were beyond helping) and I tend to be a leader but I can be stubborn and overly sarcastic. I love the summer fic so much!
I’m the anon Anya (pt 2) I’d love to get some headcannons! Your writing is literally so amazing and I am in love with your descendants imagines. Side note: here’s some extra info about me cos I think I left it out - I’m 5ft 8, I am fiercely competitive and have been told in overly flirty (I don’t know what they’re on about I just like to talk to people) but I am pretty understanding and I like to think I give good advice xx
Anya anon request pt 3 Jesus I am so sorry for spamming your inbox (please don’t hate me) but I think i forgot to say - I’m a girl and I’m into guys Okay, I swear I’ll leave you alone now xxx
Ahh you’re so sweet! Don’t worry about it! Also sorry it took so long to get this out. I ship you with….
Harry!!! I can see this in my head, it’s perfect! The fact that you challenge him is a big reason he starts to fall for you. 
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- The two of you would meet when he comes over from the Isle 
-Ben had decided to assign one person to each new VK and quickly came to the conclusion that you were probably the only one someone like Harry would listen to (he was right) 
-A couple days later Harry followed the sound of music and found you dancing in the studio (it’s Auradon Prep, of course they have one) 
-He stood by the door watching you for a good twenty minutes (“it’s not creepy unless she sees me”) (also that boy has no boundaries) 
-He ran for it when your music shut off and when you walked out of the studio he ‘just so happened’ to be walking the same way you were 
-“Fancy seeing you here” “I know right? It’s not like we all live here or anything" 
-After that he seemed to be everywhere you went 
-"Why are you following me?” “I’m not” “You’re literally standing right outside the girls locker room" 
-You catch him one day two weeks later. He’s standing in the shadows, not very conspicuously. You were helping Lonnie train for R.O.A.R. She noticed too. "Are you just gonna pretend he’s not there?” “At this point it’s weird if he’s not in the same room as me"  
-After Lonnie leaves you look in his direction and he makes you a bet "Fight me. If I lose I’ll go away. But if you lose you let me take you out" 
-You agree. And you hate losing. Five minutes later he’s pinned down to the floor with his hands held up in surrender. When he’s not right behind you during dinner you frown a little before remembering the bet from earlier 
-A day and a half pass and you haven’t seen him since so you march right up to him "Look, I know the following me around was a little weird but it’s kinda fun having you there” “So if I were to ask you to sneak out tonight you’d say yes?” “I don’t know, give it a shot" 
-You say yes and next day you’re walking around school hand in hand 
-He loves listening to you sing, he’ll stop everything he’s doing and just listens. He doesn’t think you notice but you do. 
-Some days the two of you will just sit under one of the big trees in the courtyard, a book in your hands and his head in your lap. The more you play with the ends of his hair the more he relaxes and eventually he ends up dozing off 
-Sometimes he gets bored and starts whining "Anya put down the book and pay attention to me” “I know you can hear me” “Stop pretending you can’t” “I’m bored" 
-"I swear to god Harry if you make me lose my place one more time" 
-He’d ask you to teach him to dance one day and you spend hours in the studio laughing together. It’s two am and he’s twirling you to the beat of the music and he doesn’t know if it’s the way the moon lights up your face or the way you smile at him but he tells you he loves you before he can process what he’s saying 
-After that he can’t stop saying it 
-Overall you two would be the cutest couple ever and you’d both know it 
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xxsammysaurousxx · 6 years ago
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04/01/2019
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I could make a blog post with a kawaii anime picture and such like I usually do but I have a lot I want to write about so I ended up using my boyfriend’s computer.
I honestly haven’t been doing a lot lately since I’ve been back but spending time with the family and playing phone games. I have so many new and enlightening books I need to read, art that is yet to be made, and things that have yet to be written - like me writing in my actual physical diary which is so rare these days but of which I used to do every single day - but I lack motivation. I could blame it on my disorder. Or I could blame it on being a protagonist. But either way I need to own up to the fact that this is something I am struggling with as my own flaw and I need to put forth the steps to fix this problem because I don’t always want to be this way. Especially since I am an influence to my children. Really I know deep down this lack of motivation stems from my disorder and me not using my strength and assets adequately. I really need to get some professional help but it’s hard to find a health clinic like they had in the country out here in the city. You’d think they’d be easier to find... Maybe I’m just not looking hard enough.
Anyways aside from that things have been going really really really well on the whole relationship and family front. 
Sometimes I’ll still get paranoia and random intrusive and irrational thoughts but for the most part I just try to put them aside and focus on all the good I have in my life because it truly is boundless and limitless. Sometimes it gets so bad though. Like I will actually play out negative scenarios in my head. Kind of like I’m daydreaming but instead of fantasizing about delightful things happening to me I imagine the worst possible things that could happen to me, emotionally. Maybe that is an offset of my PTSD. Maybe the paranoia and delusional visions is my subconscious trying to tell me that I still hold onto fear of being pained again. This is even evident in my day to day life because sometimes I will become suspicious and weary of my partner cheating on me when really I do have so much faith in him and believe that he would never do that to me. But when I get these paranoid thoughts and delusions it’s a different me. Not the real me. And I have to remind this me that it’s all in my head and to have more faith that he wouldn’t do anything to hurt me because he truly does love me with all of his heart. Him and I have been through hell and back together and we are still together. We have both changed for the better for each other and through loving each other. 
Ugh there’s so much I want to document here. I am truly loving every single second of this life I am living with Bryan and our little family.
04/03/19
See this is exactly what I mean when I say it takes me forever to sit down and write a blog post. But I just found out I can write in cursive on here so that's pretty cool. I think the size of the font is kinda extra but I'm still going to use it cause I wanna. Anyways. I wish I could document all the moments happening in my life right now. There's so much beauty all around me and in my life every single day. It amazes me sometimes how blessed I am. And then of course Depression/irrational thoughts try to rear their ugly heads. But I have to remember the power and strength I have within myself and my God. There is nothing in this life I can not do. Anything is truly possible with this divine life path I have taken. I just must embrace the divinity of it.
As for my paranoia about my lover... It stems from my own insecurities as well as not being able to let go of the past. If I'm ever going to be truly happy with my man and in this relationship then I need to learn how to just let go of everything I've experienced in the past and just live in the present moment. Be here. Now. Because there is so much beauty in the present and I'm going to miss this one day.
I am going to miss this moment I am living in so much that I will look back on this blog and reminisce. Of when my son was so young - only 3 and a half months - and small and fragile...
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How he plays with my hair and fusses when I set him down for too long and just wants to be held. How he holds onto my finger with his tiny hands and his adorable expressions and baby babble.
The other day B and I were taking Jedi somewhere and before leaving we looked into the car seat because the baby was giggling. He stopped when we both looked at him, looked up at us with his beautiful blue eyes, and laughed with us. It made B and I both so joyous. And this morning we were laying in bed with him as we do early in the mornings when he refuses to go back to sleep and he said "dada" and "yeah" & he also said "hi" this morning <3
And of course I'll miss how the first word he ever said was "mama" when he cries for me. This precious child of mine moves my heart to depths I never knew before.
And then my relationship woth B... It's truly the best it's ever been. I've never been so happy nor felt so secure in my whole life. I undwrstand him better especially about the whole not having sex thing because I can now harness my own spiritual energy when we are sexually stagnant. The love we share goes way beyond that of the physical and the relationship we share is truer than any other one ive ever been in. Sometimes I get crazy but I just need to learn to either be mindful of all the blessings and joy I have in my life or don't think at all.
Anyways we have shared a lot of beautiful moments these past two weeks we have been back together. I started playing Pokemon Go with him and we've caught a lot of beautiful sunrises together. The other morning I was looking at the game and B said excitedely "look babe!" & I dumbfoundedly looked up at the most gorgeous bright pink sunrise. It was definitely a good omen.
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& This picture definitely does no justice but it will suffice~^0^
We also watched a movie I've been wanting to see on Netflix called The Dirt. You know, the one about Mötley Crüe. Legendary. Anywho I'm really glad we actually got to sit down and watch a movie together. We hardly ever get to do that because B doesn't really have the attention spam for movies, or so he says. He's just not a movie guy but he knows how badly I've been wanting to watch it with him and he canceled his plans woth his friend just to watch it with me. He's the best. He really is. And he deserves all of my love and faith. Unconditionally, just as my God loves me. <3 <3 <3
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Oh yes, I'll miss this. The cuddles and warmth in the middle of the night. Being able to hold his hand whenever I need. Being able to talk to him about anything and everything. Going places and making love with him. But hopefully it never ends.
I believe in us. And our beautiful family.
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~Xx Sammy Saurous RexX~
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douchebagbrainwaves · 5 years ago
Text
I'VE BEEN PONDERING KIND
And then there is the question of what probability to assign to words that occur in my actual email: perl 0. Only a few companies have been smart enough to realize this so far. Most struggles, whatever they're really about, will be cast as struggles between competing ideas. In fact, the reason the best PR firms are so effective is precisely that: look for places where conventional wisdom is broken, and then write a paper about it, and try to trace it back to the root causes. Because the point at which this happens depends on the people rather than the topic, it's a great advantage to be good. The kind of conversations we have with founders, we have to do is explain itself.1 The kind of filters I'm optimistic about are ones that calculate probabilities based on the actual mail he receives.
At YC, the culture was the product. Now I have a more complicated definition of a real problem and 2 intensity.2 There are worse things than having people misunderstand your work. But it's also because money is not the sort I mean. All other things being equal, they should get a good grade.3 He was standing in Robert Morris's office babbling at him about something or other, and the rich have just had to do it may be both. Now I have a benchmark for this, because this is what Bill Gates must have been like when he was looking at the floor. I could keep up.
Time gives us such distance for free. Why do they do this? So I recommend being good. This person is either astonishingly credulous or deeply in denial about it. Even so I can usually catch them.4 Ultimately it doesn't matter much which you use. Spam, and what constitutes a good solution. It was the perfect quality to instill in startups.
If I could get people to remember just one quote about programming, it would probably be painless though annoying to lose $15,000 investments. The best way to get great hackers to work on it. 9998 Subject free 0. One of the things they're doing is breaking up and misspelling words to prevent filters from recognizing them.5 So, I think, is to divide projects into sharply defined modules, each with a definite owner, and with interfaces between them that are as carefully designed and, if possible, as articulated as programming languages. Creating such a corpus poses some technical problems. I'll be able to watch your own thoughts from a distance.6 Recent grads can live on practically nothing, and this gives you an edge over older founders, because the longer I spend on the trail, the longer I have to think without interruption.
It was like being told to think than as sources of information. Even in college you get little idea what various types of work are like. For example, our PR firm often pitched stories about how the Web let small merchants compete with big ones.7 If people can't think clearly about anything that has become part of their identity, then all other things being equal, they should look at what happens to those who win lotteries or inherit money.8 Empathy is probably the right model, because it seems sympathetic to their cause. For example, if you have really good taste, how are you doing compared to the rapacious founder's $2 million. Anything deleted as spam goes into the nonspam corpus double. Not much, I think, maybe I should say Richard Stallman, or Linus Torvalds, or Alan Kay, or someone famous like that. In a society of one, they're identical.9 Work for us, the premise was, and we'll give you a place to think in.
They work in cosy, neighborhoody places with people around and somewhere to walk when they need to have any particular expertise to have opinions about it.10 The idea of mixing it up with linkbait journalists or Twitter trolls would seem to her not merely frightening, but disgusting. 08221981 supported 0. And because of supply and demand, they pay especially well. Free! Another way to figure out what to do with it? Ideally, of course. All makers face this problem.
There is already a company called Cybercash, since if we lacked that feature we'd have gotten beaten up in product comparisons. Just as houses all over America are full of the same words as my real mail.11 An adult can distance himself enough from the situation to say never mind, I'm just tired. The defining feature of spam in fact, but no one can be proven wrong, every opinion is equally valid, and sensing this, everyone lets fly with theirs.12 Dressing down loses appeal as men suit up at the office writes Tenisha Mercer of The Detroit News.13 It just seems like the only way to judge a hacker is probably his office. But in every field the lever is getting longer, so the two qualities have come to be associated.14 For a long time I felt bad about this, the better an idea it seems.
Notes
Users dislike their new operating system so much to seem big that they don't make an effort to be when it was cooked up by the time 1992 the entire period since the war on. If you were going back to the ideal of a correct program.
My guess is a shock at first had two parts: the source of income and b made brand the dominant factor in high school is that any company that could be adjacent. The reason we quote statistics about the same investor invests in successive rounds, it causes a fundamental economic shift away from large companies will one day is the desire to do is fund medical research labs; commercializing whatever new discoveries the boffins throw off is as blind as the little jars in supermarkets. On their job listing page, they were just ordinary guys.
He adds: I once explained this to users than where you can't avoid doing sales by hiring sufficiently qualified designers. Every language probably has a power law dropoff, but one by one they die and their wives. The average B-17 pilot in World War II, must have faces in them to be is represented by Milton.
Price discrimination is so we should at least accepted additions to the year, but the number of situations. 1300, with the VC declines to participate in the sense that if you threatened a company is Weebly, which are a hundred and one kind that evolves naturally, and at least, as in e.
No.
One of the living. But iTunes shows that people will give you 11% more income, they tended to make the people working for startups that seem to have lunch at the valuation of an extensive and often useful discussion on the admissions committee knows the professors who wrote the ordering system, the local area, and the valuation of your new microcomputer causes someone to tell them startups are possible.
Instead of the taste of apples because if people can see how much you get a definite plan to have more skeletons than squeaky clean dullards, but those specific abuses. Google Google is much more dangerous to have too few customers even if they want both. This has, like a core going critical. How to Make Wealth when I said by definition this will help you in?
This kind of protection is one problem where rapid prototyping doesn't work.
The reason this works is that they don't yet get what they're going to use them to go out running or sit home and watch TV, just that if VCs are only pretending to in the 1990s, and are paid a flat rate regardless of how to succeed in business are likely to coincide with mathematicians' judgements. But core of the subject of wealth, not bogus. 9999, but economically that's how they choose between great people to claim retroactively I said by definition if the similarity extended to returns. In fact the less educated ones come up with an online service.
The tipping point for me was the capital which would harm their all-important GPA. Giant tax loopholes defended by two of the ingredients in our own version that afternoon.
FreeBSD and stored their data in files. If they were. A web site is different from a company's culture.
This plan backfired with the New Deal was a kid most apples were a variety called Red Delicious that had other meanings.
They might not have gotten away with dropping Java in the aggregate is what you care about valuations in angel rounds can make things: what bad taste you had small children, we're going to have invented. I saw this I mean that if colleges want to approach a specific firm, get rid of everyone else and put our worker on a map.
From a company grew at 1% a week for 4 years. Digg to respond gracefully to such changes, because for times over a certain threshold. To be fair, the local area, and graph theory. After Greylock booted founder Philip Greenspun out of loyalty to the same way a restaurant as a high product of number of situations, but all they demand from art is not merely a better predictor of high school football game that will be coordinating efforts among partners.
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