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divineprank · 1 year ago

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I’m sorry but this ain’t it, chief.

The importance of character-driven narratives shouldn’t be underestimated when discussing the profound impact it has not only the characters themselves, but also the player as well. Embracing the complexity and depth of characters like Ganondorf adds a layer of emotional engagement that enriches the gaming experience and solidifies the game's legendary status and success.

It really isn’t “weird” that people are mourning the loss of a more complex version of a character they’ve been deeply anticipating the return of after a seventeen years-long absence. Yes, real-life includes individuals who are shitty just for the sake of being shitty. However, the Zelda series already features such villains like Vaati, Demise, Bellum, and Majora. Ganondorf, on the other hand, does not need to fit this mold, particularly when his introduction to the series already had him engaging in an emotionally charged backstory. Removing these motivations from Ganondorf's character now risks destabilizing and creating incoherence within the well-established lore, and more importantly, threatens the subtext, symbolism and overall point of the stories that The Legend of Zelda is trying to tell. Compelling villains challenge not just the protagonist, but also invite the players to engage and connect with the story on a much deeper level. Ganondorf's depth in the Wind Waker specifically, adds layers to the game’s narrative, providing itself to enhance the poignant subtext and frankly, the point of the game’s story that you seem very comfortable as dismissing as “good versus evil” and requiring nothing more of it. Ganondorf's "deep" motivations and backstory are not added just for sympathy; they serve as a critical element woven into the game's subtext and theming. Stripping Ganondorf of this aspect would undermine the entire narrative and rob players of the game's powerful message: the necessity of letting go of the past to embrace a new future.

To continue with Wind Waker’s example for a moment more, his actions demonstrate how clinging to the past can blind one to the possibilities of the present and future. This theming resonates throughout the game because of Ganondorf, so that other characters can explore their personal journeys and character development, like Link and Tetra, who must confront the legacies of their ancestors in order to forge their own paths ahead. Ganondorf's storyline in Wind Waker is not just about making him a sympathetic villain and it’s obvious that that’s flown right over your head. His “deep” role is a pivotal part of the game's thematic exploration, it underscores the importance of embracing change, accepting the passage of time, and learning from the past while continuing to move forward; it also depicts the sacredness and fragility of nature and demonstrates what happens when we neglect the responsibility we all have to respect the world around us. Stripping Ganondorf of this depth would undermine the narrative's powerful message about growth, and the value of breaking free from our past, and would also eliminate the emphasis it places on the heavy consequences of mistreating nature, which are reflections of extremely important Shinto beliefs. Ultimately, Ganondorf's motivations in any Zelda game add emotional weight and resonance to the story, making it a rich and and impactful gaming experience that usually goes far beyond the simplistic dichotomy of heroes and villains and delves into profound explorations of the complexities of being alive and navigating the human experience. It’s not just a story about good guys defeating bad guys. You just have to do more than skim the surface to catch on to this.

Feeling sympathy for a villain isn't the only way to make them compelling, you are correct here, yes. Sometimes a story doesn’t need a complicated villain with a tragic backstory to enhance the experience. In writing, less can definitely be more. However, offering emotional nuance to a character will always enhance their depth and I will argue that this is incredibly important when it comes a series with characters as rich and narratives as powerful as the Legend of Zelda’s.

To suggest we need to “divorce” ourselves from needing to feel sympathy for our villains is also a really shitty thing to expect of people because it comes across as policing what we can and can’t enjoy to appeal to your personal tastes and sensibilities. As human beings, our ability to empathize and understand the motivations of others is a fundamental aspect of our what we are. Storytelling is a powerful medium that allows us to explore the complexities of the human experience, and that absolutely includes delving into the minds of villains. To utilize sympathetic villains in writing and storytelling also encourages us to confront the shades of gray that exist within ourselves and in the world around us. It challenges us to think about the decisions we make and to consider what makes a person a good person, and what might make someone be considered a bad person. By demanding that we abandon our desire for sympathetic villains, frankly, you are asking that we oversimplify storytelling and stifle both creativity and more importantly, the potential for meaningful and emotionally engaging experiences. I’m not okay with that.

I’ll be totally honest: your entire post comes off as nothing more than you wanting to be a contrarian just for the sake of taking a contrarian stance. Simply stating that 'shitty people exist in real life' isn’t really a justification for stripping Ganondorf of his once-established complexity and expecting fans of that version of him to stop being upset about it. Real-world examples of shitty behavior doesn’t diminish the importance of well-developed characters in storytelling, and to suggest we all just need to “divorce” ourselves from enjoying emotionally complex and engaging villains is unfair and immature, and frankly, really embarrassing for you. Your argument comes across as extremely ignorant and also a little condescending towards Ganondorf fans. Just because you might be satisfied with the portrayal we got in Tears of the Kingdom doesn’t give you permission to shut down those who value the complexities and depths of his character. I’m happy that you had a good time with the game, and I’m glad he was appropriately intimidating for you. That being said, kindly back off.

Thanks. 👍

I’m so confused by the number of people who DEMAND a compelling Ganondorf. Literally we haven’t had a “deep” Ganondorf since Wind Waker almost 20 years ago. And even then his motivation was “sand sucks, I miss cool wind and water.”

And it’s weird how many people are depressed by Ganondorf’s lust for power. As if there needs to be a reason for it. Have you not been living in the real world? Shitty people who do anything for consolidating power and nothing else? They exist. They’re literally destroying the planet we all live on… right now. Ganondorf craves power and nothing else. That’s his whole deal. He doesn’t NEED more motivation.

We really need to divorce this idea that you need to feel sympathy for a villain for them to be compelling.

Like, did we not get much dialogue or motivation from Ganondorf in Tears of the Kingdom? Yes. Did I still feel super intimidated by him and freaked out by his machinations? Yes! Ganondorf is crazy and his ruthlessness comes through and that’s all the motivation I need to understand him and know why I need to take him out.

#Out of time. :: [OUT OF CHARACTER]

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nukenai · 2 years ago

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sorry this is just gonna be me talking a bit about my experience playing live a live vs how i feel about something that’s been dear to my soul since i was 5 years old (pokemon). Slight LAL spoilers I guess lmao.

The big word I can use to describe Live A Live is REFRESHING. Me, personally, I am such a fan of sprite work. I love sprites. Black and White I think are the most visually appealing Pokemon games. I really can’t even say I minded the XY style... I think ORAS really, really benefited from how beautiful it was, and I’m glad I was able to see Hoenn remade in 3D. The experience is unmatched.

But.

I think that the switch to 3D models loses a lot of style. I think it loses a lot of, let’s say class. I played a bit of the FF4 remake and ooh, boy. I get it. I get why they want to switch to 3D models. But I can’t even express how overjoyed I am that they did NOT do that with Live A Live. They didn’t go with chunky, clunky, ugly polygonal chibis or even worse, realistically proportioned 3D models. I can’t IMAGINE what a nightmare that would’ve been.

Instead they took a game that was sprites, and made it nicer sprites. They made the backgrounds deep and detailed. Extremely fucking cool. I remember being excited when I saw Octopath - but I don’t like JRPGs, and I have to be honest, I do NOT like the art style of Octopath. Every trailer I saw for that game... my big thought was WHERE ARE THE FUCKING COLORS? That’s even a complaint I have about the official art for LAL’s cast... I kind of hate it all. I hate the desaturation.

But LAL itself, the actual game, HOLY hell! I played Prehistory first which was a fine chapter, I’m pretty neutral on it but it was so COLORFUL! VIBRANT! Then I played Edo Japan which was darker, because it is night time. But I found myself constantly stopping, and saying, out loud, “Wow, this game is beautiful”. I tweeted some screenshots with that as a caption, which was the first LAL tweet I made that Tokita-san faved and retweeted.

This was the view that first made me really go, “Wow”.

I used to edit sprites when I was a kid. I couldn’t draw, but I loved editing Pokemon trainers into my OCs. With the switch to 3D models, I was dead in the water. I couldn’t do shit! It kinda sucked. I cried when I got to play with my Pokemon in Pokemon Amie. But for all we gained with the 3D models, I feel like we lost a lot, too. Legends Arceus is exempt from this discussion as it is a shining beauty of a game and I adore it. JUST WISH I COULD HEAR THE FUCKING MUSIC.

This is a disorganized rant but basically, I’m just saying I’m so happy that there is a market for games like Live A Live to be remade, to look like how they were always dreamed up to be. And that doesn’t mean 3D models, it doesn’t mean HD. Sometimes it just means a coat of love, and that so much feels like what this game got.

Recent Pokemon games don’t feel like that to me. I didn’t hate Sword and Shield, but boy, are they ugly and bland. Not once did I ever say “wow” or even FEEL any sort of awe or joy at the environments. The Eternatus fight was not impressive and I hated the entire plot of that game. The Crown Tundra DLC was ok because I got horses. But the whole place was just so fucking ugly. I don’t just blame the UK for that either. Shit was unfinished and looked like garbage.

Scarlet and Violet are giving me the same feeling. I’m not excited. The environments look maybe better, but I feel no style. I don’t feel love. It looks like everything else, but maybe slightly worse. It’s all the same. I also felt like that seeing every fucking Square game in the Direct today. Shit all looks the same, I can’t tell any of it apart.

But I see Live A Live, and it even looks so different from Octopath. My only memories of it, and from the sequel’s trailer today, are washed out browns and bronzes and dust and blah. But just look at the screenshot up there. It’s supposed to be night time and there’s purples. Reds. Oboromaru’s motif color is purple and it’s washed throughout the entire chapter. The insides of the castle are lit with candles and you can feel that.

And that’s just one chapter. Damn. I fucking hated the Middle Ages chapter but I can still say it’s beautiful. I enjoyed dipshitting around in the Dominion of Hate for a while, GRINDING UP MASARU’S FUCKIN LEVEL 2 ASS, cause the place was still so pretty despite it all. I felt welcome in that game and like it was happy to have me. Even if I’m some fake fan who didn’t play the original and had only heard of it, and only had a couple songs on my ipod because Yoko composed them.

Idk man. I’ve just got a ton of thoughts. It’s been a really, really long time since a game deeply affected me like Live A Live has. Legends Arceus having a couple bangers and also having Ingo in it is not the same. I loved that game but it didn’t hit me in my soul like Live A Live has. I’m hoping this game will stick with me and be at the front of my heart for the rest of my life.

And I want more people to enjoy it, too.

Anyways look at these fucking sick-ass sprites of Edgelord of Dark Oersted they fucking rock

#just little ranty thoughts of mine #on artstyles and style in general #nothing really profound or poignant here

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jungk0oksthighs · 2 years ago

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Okay so these are my top picks from the PG update! (PG is the best ff I’ve ever read btw you’re soooo talented it’s crazy!)

Yoongi… kinda feeling him actually, he obviously cares for OC and had the balls to warn Jungkook away from her knowing what he is. That’s hot

Yoongis roommate has to be a vampire, he washed his hands and after coming into contact with the rose thorn and when oc said ur roommate won’t be drinking it what’s the problem, yoongis word choice I feel is super important and foreshadowing: “not directly, no” - maybe he and his roommate have a similar relationship to jk and oc? Blood donating I mean! That’s why he couldn’t drink it

Okay LORD HAVE MERCY ON US ALL - Jungkook saying he’s not jealous while displaying classic jealous boyfriend behaviour is exquisite, he’s down baaaad for her. He seemed to soften when oc confirmed nothing had happened between her and Yoongi. Come on JK you’re so messy and obvious rn

The first quote I wanna point out: “you’d only turn if you died with my blood in your system, and you’re even more of a fool than I thought if you haven’t realised by now I would never let that happen” UMMMM OKAAAY

“The unfathomable desire to have you… makes me feel human again.” OKAY OK OK WE SEEING THE REAL JUNGKOOK HERE NOW MY GUY DOES NOT WANT TO BE A VAMPIRE. MY CHEST HURTS

“If I had a soul it would already be yours” OH THE WAY THAT HIIIIIT!! I’ve never come across a dialogue so poignant in fanfic before. It’s so memorable and profound and holds a thousand potential meanings and yeah I’ll be thinking about that line forever, kudos author truly what a spectacular piece of literature there

OKAY AND ANOTHER NOTE I REALLY REALLY LIKED! When jk told oc to get out and she was like “you don’t get to kiss me like that and pretend it never happened” STORMING OVER TO HIM, yesssss girrrrrrl!!! The TENSION from that line alone. Especially when it was never finished bc Jungkook kissed her again to shut her the hell up

Honestly I can feeeeel their emotions, your description is so well written like I completely understand and know how they yearn for each other so badly but of course they’re both hesitant for their own reasons

So I’ve been stalking your blog and nobody else has mentioned this. HE. ALMOST. BIT. HER. LIKE!!!???!!!?! JUNGKOOK. ALMOST. BIT. OC!!! And he “doesn’t bite / feed directly from humans / the vein” LIKE ?!?! THATS HUUUUUUGE

In case this wasn’t clear enough I really fucking loved this update, thank you for sharing your talent with us I can’t believe this is a free fanfiction! Its written better than every book I’ve ever read, I MEAN that too I’m a book nerd and nothing even comes close to the slow burn / intensity and overall seductive theme of PG!

Oh and that kiss… That’s the best kissing scene I’ve ever read, periodt. So beautifully written and captured all her emotions, and the DIALOGUE leading up to the kiss??? Shiiiiiit it was so so so intense and good y’all

Thank you so much for sharing this masterpiece with us! I’m 100% going to binge read the whole of your masterlist now as I’m pretty new here, I’ve only fully read PG and HER (and the change of pace is? UNNERVING, you can legitimately write anything!!!)

Author, you forever have my love and respect. Thank you for sharing such wonderful work with us and giving us great fanfics to escape with, i sincerely hope you get published one day ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

OH MY GOODNESS OKAY, WOW. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO SEND THIS MESSAGE IT MUSTVE TAKEN YOU SO LONG TO WRITE! Let’s unpack this:

Ooooh my goodness your first two points already… wow. I can’t confirm or deny anything to avoid spoilers of course but wow! Your brain is doing overtime and i LOVE your thoughts!! Interesting!! I’m glad at least one of u is a fan of neighbour Yoongi here hehe, everybody else seems to be sus of his behaviour!

Oh wow the way you’ve picked up on these quotes and analysed them I’m so beyond flattered right now :( thank you :( ahhhh!!! I love writing PG jk dialogue bc he’s obviously much older than oc and speaks like he’s from a different era sometimes and it’s very fun to play around with, it means so much that you think his lines are poignant :( thank u :(

Ooooof we love oc for doing that actually!!! The way she was like oh hell no we aren’t done here and Jungkook just… sigh… I’m so weak for this couple u have no idea. Thank u for picking up on that detail!

AHHH SOMEONE NOTICED YES JUNGKOOK ALMOST BIT HER AHHH SOMEONE NOTICED THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR POINTING THIS OUT MY DARLING !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, YES this is HUGE !!!!

Oh my god I’m actually a little emotional rn, thank you for being so kind and taking the time to read the update and then analyse it and send me this message I’m just… so flattered right now! Thank you so much!!! 🥹😭 I hope you enjoy reading through my other works!!! Thank you for being here (naming u flame heart anon from now ok) and thank you again for being so genuinely sweet with your review/analysis of the PG update, you’re amazing and I appreciate u so much!!! 😭😭 sending lots of love to u!!!! 💜💜💜💜

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citrus-cactus · 3 years ago

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Finished the story of Psychonauts 2 last week! It was really good. Like, REALLY, really good. I don’t have anything profound to say, but here are my thoughts if you wanna read ‘em. Obviously there are SPOILERS BELOW, so click at your own risk if you haven’t played into post-game! (FWIW, I HIGHLY recommend playing this game as spoiler-free as possible. And play the original, while you’re at it!).

Here’s a pretty tame spoiler that I don’t think anyone will mind me sharing though: RAZ IS A CUTE. JUST LOOK AT HIM:

Things I appreciated:

Raz asking permission before entering almost every brain

PET THE GOATS

BOBBY DANCE

Getting to see Whispering Rock a couple of different ways! Actually, the theme of showing events from multiple perspectives (and the different forms of trauma resulting from certain events) was really good.

Raz helping the Psychic Seven help themselves. The game is so gentle with these old damaged hippies. SO GOOD.

QUEEPIE AND FRAZIE and just… all the Aquatos, man. What a group.

The family being given space to grieve together (important) before yeeting their middle boy into the whirlpool (badass). And them still having a lot to unpack/figure out post-game. It’s complicated, man! Of COURSE they wouldn’t have it all figured out yet!

Larry and Pam! LOL.

SAM BOOLE, WTH. Best dialogue tree in the game??? XDDDD

WHOMST in-universe put the graffiti on the back side of the funicular? Oleander?? :O

I have not finished the Scavenger Hunt yet, so idk if Raz gets his clothes back. I’m betting not *shakes psychic fist at Norma* XD

Powers and combat were all really cool!

ANIMATION! ALSO!! REALLY!!! GOOD!!!!!

I’M STILL LOSING MY DANG MIND OVER RAZ’S ARCHETYPE, good god. Double Fine, you mad geniuses, how DARE you stage a Zim/Gir reunion in the year 2021??? If anyone has ever equipped the pin that mutes that delightful little paper lad, I cannot emphasize enough how dead you are to me XD

I thought Cassie sounded a little like Mona Marshall?? The credits proved me wrong, but there were several moments I thought “…maybe??” (I have a much easier time ID’ing her when she’s playing a boyish character than a woman, whoops!)

So much symbolism in the brains! “Subtle” is maybe the wrong word to use, but between some of the throwaway dialogue, the different subsections in each, and the different set designs, most of the mental states just felt more… complex? nuanced? than the first game.

I don’t actually know if I could pick a favorite level! Compton’s Cookoff was definitely the most unique (I would have appreciated the option to try the food challenges again, but “getting the best time” is obviously NOT THE POINT, so kudos to the game making it about the story/character and not about the player here!), and I really enjoyed the paper-and-book-aesthetic of Cassie’s! Bob’s boss battle was one of the most poignant, but the 60’s psychedelic aesthetic and Nona’s different layers were really creative and fun. I also liked that we got a few different styles for Raz (especially in the 2D sections!) but I always could have used more!

On that note though, CENSORS! IN!! SEQUINS!!! XDDDDDDD

THE MUSIC!!! My husband and I JUST realized that Peter McConnell scored the Sly Cooper series as well, so we have newfound RESPECT and AWE for this guy’s ability to write absolutely fantastic music in so many distinct styles and genres. Both of the songs w/ lyrics also slap.

The return/spiritual successor of Goggalor (Pootie-lor???). Amazing. Incredible. Did not expect it, loved it for how narratively important it was. The ending in general just made me quite emotional.

The post-game conversation between Truman and Lilli. Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but it absolutely RADIATES Tim Schafer dad/real-life daughter energy.

The Grulovia level was a really interesting way to introduce a villain. Based on every level previous, I was actually prepared for the game to offer some sympathetic facet of Gristol (such as finding out the ride was something he had been conditioned to think from a lifetime of hearing an idealized version of the story from his parents, and it was somewhere he would go to rationalize his actions despite not really believing them… or something), but obviously the longer you spend there, the more you realize it’s something he constructed himself, and he is actually delusional (er, delugional) about Maligula and his family’s legacy. Really sets up an interesting parallel with Raz, in a way. Gristol’s mental state is essentially that of a child… but Raz is an ACTUAL child, and demonstrates more maturity, empathy and understanding than both Gristol the kid (see the Mental Vaults) and Gristol the adult. Kind of amazing he was able to fool a whole building full of psychics for as long as he did (and I guess he was a fine mail clerk too??), but tl;dr I like how the game’s “true” villain is the only one who is unable to change/experience any sort of remorse for his actions (maybe the jury’s still out on Dr. Loboto though XD)

A little concerned that Hollis said Gristol’s fate was to be “experimentation,” and only corrected to say “therapy” when questioned by Raz. UM. This game does make it part of its point showing us the flaws in the Psychonauts, both as an organization and as individuals, leaving them in a bit of a mortally grey area (who are clearly mismanaging their resources if they have a whole Motherlobe of agents doing who-knows-what and their primary source of funding is running summer camps for psychic children). I am… definitely concerned about what Hollis said (as well as Otto’s assertion that he would be picking up where the Seven left off!), but I guess I can accept it as part of the theme that no one and nothing is perfect. Maybe that’s sequel fodder though??? (hey, I can dream about Psychonauts 3, can’t I? XD)

Genuinely though, I’m just… SO PROUD OF RAZ. He’s going to be such a good agent someday!!!*cries forever over one begoggled psychic acrobat son boy*

#psychonauts 2 #psychonauts 2 spoilers #double fine #the cactus speaks #video james

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tomorrow-and-tomorrows · 4 years ago

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Narrative perspective and how cursed techniques become worlds: Gojou Satoru

In a key moment when theorizing about the nature of soul and body, the Brain speculates that “techniques dictate our worlds”. One of the other ways in which technique = world becomes literalized is through the narrative perspective from which we see characters.

Perspective, or point of view, determines our angle of vision through which to perceive character and story. It shapes representation and determines both how and what we are allowed to see.

Gojou

Gojou’s default technique is Limitless, which brings forth the distance that makes it impossible for objects in the world to reach him; neutral Limitless puts an uncrossable distance between himself and the world.

In the one-year timeskip after Riko Amanai’s death, it’s precisely as he’s learning to have his Limitless activated at all times that he and Geto become unable to reach each other. As Gojou’s power increases to sustain this invisible space, an uncrossable distance opens up between the person who was closest to him.

But I think there’s an additional distance that opens up as Gojou’s technique strengthens: The narrative distance preventing access to Gojou’s direct perspective and interiority after the Hidden Inventory Arc.

In contrast to how we were plunged into Geto’s intense introspection, there is nothing of Gojou’s internal thoughts from the immensely important turning point of the Premature Death chapters to ch.79 when he approaches Megumi. During these chapters, his Limitless technique defines his “world” both within the story (physically and interpersonally/emotionally), and on this meta-level of narration.

From then on, Geto and the readers can only observe Gojou from the outside: his inner mind becomes inaccessible and unreachable. So much so that, as readers, we might feel the absence distinctly as if part of the story after the Hidden Inventory arc and during Premature Death arc is altogether missing or incomplete.

In order to understand his words and expressions here, we are required to interpret, to try to bridge that impenetrable space that never lets us get any closer to Gojou. These two moments in particular illustrate this narrative distance, again as the most defining moments of his life, yet we are left looking on from the outside, ever held at a distance from his actual mind.

These two moments are the most defining moments of his life - dealing with losing Geto, and the first step he takes to dedicating his life to raising young allies through education. These moments are angled very similarly; our angle of vision is to look at Gojou, not through Gojou’s perspective.

We get physically close to Gojou’s eyes as possible, but that is the limit: there is a silence, an uncrossable space between us and his interiority. We never get so close as to access his inner thoughts when it is most important. It feels almost impersonal, alienating as readers to not be privy to these turning points in his worldview.

And it’s not just the case in these two singular moments, but the entire situation after the Hidden Inventory arc. How did Gojou emotionally process Riko’s death? What was on his mind during the time he was sent on solo missions no longer accompanied by Geto? How did he feel about Haibara’s death? How much of Geto’s psychological state was he really aware of? How did his reflections on Toji’s last words lead to him reaching out to Megumi?

It’s also the narrative method after he kills Geto in the prequel: we are shut out from his private emotions, only able to see what he chooses to reveal to the external world - nothing more than an inscrutable smile and a brief expression of affection for the person he had just killed. Does he feel guilt? Acceptance? What were his emotions in the moments after Geto’s death? We are denied access to these answers.

Similarly, many of those above questions about the post-Inventory arc situation will never be definitively answered in the way of internal monologue. However, many of them are implicitly answered, just not in a conventional, straightforward way. Rather than understanding him by being able to access his interiority, we are required to construct an understanding of him based on his external actions.

“Narrative says less than it knows, but it often makes known more than it says.” - Gérard Genette, Narrative Discourse

His response to failing to save Riko, to killing Toji, to Geto leaving, and so on -- we see how nearly all his subsequent actions are haunted by and in response to all these events. We don’t get internal monologue recounting what he feels, but we can try to discern how he feels in everything that he does, every decision that he makes throughout the rest of the story. Becoming an educator, finding meaning through raising allies to connect with, saving Megumi from the Zen’in clan, saving Yuta and Yuji from execution, endorsing Maki’s ambition to transform the Zen’in family, seeking change through education rather than violence, shouldering the balance of the both the jujutsu and human world--

In all of these decisions, we get as close to answer as possible of what he feels in response to the personal catastrophes of his youth that he had silently endured: above all, a deep sense of responsibility and a profound internalization of the experiences and painful lessons that come to define his entire life.

It is also no coincidence that, in Shibuya Arc, it is at the same moment the Prison Realm is able to physically overcome the distance of his Limitless technique, that this narrative distance established in chapters 76-79 is crossed for the first time in a meaningful way.

Throughout his fight with Jogo and Hanamai, we do get a some of his internal thoughts, but it’s for the practical purpose of knowing what his strategical deductions are; they tell us nothing substantial about his emotions, hence not what I consider a ‘meaningful’ overcoming of distance.

But as his Limitless utterly fails to prevent the Prison Realm from seizing him, suddenly that object in the world is able to reach him, and the narrative is simultaneously able to ‘reach’ his mind to a greater extent than before. Whilst he had previously successfully shut everything out, now he is suddenly permeable both in body and mind.

More precisely, what I’ve been calling this ‘narrative distance’ is crossed immediately before the physical distance is eliminated. The emotional distance is actually breached before the physical, but ultimately these two results are inseparable from each other.

Finally, we begin to understand directly, through just a momentary glimpse into his interiority, how strongly he feels the loss of his best friend, how present and alive those years of his youth are constantly in his mind. Seeing Suguru’s face after being emotionally and physically drained by his fight is what exposes his vulnerability, a weakness of the heart that we wouldn’t even be sure was still there until this moment.

It’s the delayed emotional insight into Gojou that makes it all the more poignant; we’re well past his Past arc, but it’s only now that we become privy to how heavily those events weigh on his mind. On a first reading, it would require us to slightly re-write what we would’ve understood of Gojou solely based on the previously distant, impersonal feeling we got from those past chapters.

The final major implication of what I’ve been suggesting is how, in light of all this, how to think about the effect of the last real substantial access to his inner thoughts/emotions.

The last meaningful unmediated access we get to Gojou’s inner thoughts/emotions during his Past Arc is this moment when he renounces human emotion and apologizes to Riko for feeling like he’s no longer fighting for her sake.

Even though this is a powerful, lasting impression of his inner mind for readers, it is not the case that this moment of egoism, self-centredness, and renunciation of compassion is completely who Gojou Satoru remains even as an adult. Gojou definitely retains some of those traits in his personality - I don’t want to overlook the extent of his individualistic mentality, self-involvement, and difficulty emotionally considering others. However, his actions in the aftermath of this spiritual transcendence demonstrate that this moment and those characteristics do not define his entire person at the expense of all others.

Again: the narrative distance that deliberately denies readers access to his inner mind after the Hidden Inventory Arc requires us to evaluate his character based on his subsequent actions that demonstrate his movement away from this emotionless, compassionless state, towards motivations that are highly emotionally driven.

Although this renunciation of human emotion and obligation towards Riko is the last substantial thought we receive from Gojou’s direct point of view, his character has not remained static since that temporary moment. On the contrary, he develops drastically from that, though we witness this change from the outside: the Gojou Satoru we see after the one-year timeskip and ten years later in the present day is a largely different Gojou Satoru than the one who feels no anger on behalf of a child he’d failed to protect - and the only way we can understand this when his mind is largely closed off to us is through looking at his external actions.

For example, in stark juxtaposition to his apology to Riko for not feeling anger or vengefulness, not only does Gojou immediately after think of killing the cult members to avenge her death, a large part of his philosophy as a teacher is founded on anger on behalf of children whose youth are threatened to be cut short. We get this primarily through external speech and action.

We do not experience his anger, realization of the value of working together with allies rather than exclusively as an individual, or decision to save children like Yuta and Yuji through a step-by-step psychological progression: we only see the end results of all that development that certainly occurs, but is hidden from us.

For such a major character, I find this a fascinating method that might run contrary to our expectations of how to portray and understand character development. It requires a greater degree of interpretation about the internal thought and emotional processes that, though not brought to the surface of the narrative, are at the foundation of his external actions, speech, and expressions throughout the story.

“Narrative 'representation', or, more exactly, narrative information, has its degrees: the narrative can furnish the reader with more or fewer details, and in a more or less direct way, and can thus seem to keep a greater or lesser distance from what it tells." - Gérard Genette

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk meta #gojo satoru

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drsilverfish · 4 years ago

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The Blood Sigil in 15x18 Despair

I’m really snowed under with work at the moment, but, I thought I’d say a quick something about the blood warding sigil in 15x18.

Obviously, Ouroboros-style, this symbol is a call-back to earlier episodes in the SPN narrative.

Cas uses a blood-sigil here, in 15x18 Despair, to block Billie’s power to crush Dean’s heart in his chest, temporarily. This is, of course, a heart-breaking piece of both foreshadowing and dramatic irony, because we are more familiar with the blood sigil as an angel-banishing spell. And (this is the foreshadowing part) Castiel, just moments later, chooses to “banish” himself, by summoning The Empty to save Dean from Death, knowing the blood sigil will fail. Moreover (and this is the dramatic irony part) we have seen what Cas’ death does to Dean (his suicidal ideation in 13x05 Advanced Thanatology) but Cas still doesn’t truly know that he is breaking Dean’s heart here, with much more deadly force than Death’s own death-grip on said heart. Ahhhhhh....

The angel-banishing sigil is also important to Castiel’s whole story-arc of rebellion against Heaven, because in 4x22 Lucifer Rising, Castiel full-on rebels (after his earlier attempt to do so, in 4x20 The Rapture, which got him dragged back to Heaven for torture “re-education”) by saving Dean from the apocalypse “Green Room” by banishing Zacharia:

Image credit: Superwiki:

http://www.supernaturalwiki.com/Angel_Banishing_Sigil#4.20_The_Rapture

Also, remember Cas’ rather poignant, even sarcastic line, “Always happy to bleed for the Winchesters...” in 7x21 Reading is Fundamental? Well, here in 15x18, Cas literally draws his own blood, once again, as he sacrifices himself forever (so he believes - but we don’t, right?) to save Dean.

And hello Christ symbology, as the bloody hand-print Cas leaves behind on Dean’s jacket, invokes not only their “profound bond” and the original “raised from perdition” hand-brand on Dean’s shoulder, in 4x01 Lazarus Rising, but (in subtext) the sacred stigmata of Christ on the cross.

Plus, that line, “Always happy to bleed for the Winchesters...” echoes from the past of the story here, because Cas is sucked into The Empty in 15x18 still believing in some sense, that he is, fundamentally, cared for by Dean because of his usefulness as an angelic tool. That is highlighted for us in the mirror dialogue between Cas and Jack earlier in the episode, when Cas tells his Nephilim son what he clearly wishes he could hear from his “found family” for himself:

Cas (to Jack): “We don’t care about you because you’re useful, or because you fit into some grand design. We care about you, because you’re you.”

Of course, Cas’ self-esteem issues are lying to him about how Dean really feels about him, but this episode ain’t called Despair for nothing.

Also, and this is just me, as an old-skool Buffy fan (although the SPN writers’ room has made a number of Buffy references over the years) but this blood symbolism reminded me of Spike in the episode Lovers Walk (Buffy 3x08) who said (to Buffy and Angel):

“Love isn't brains, children, it's blood -- blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.”

Well, Cas just broke Heaven’s last taboo to admit it.

Remember past (female vessel) Castiel in 12x10 Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets passing (unjust) sentence on a fellow-angel, Akobel, for, apparently, falling in love with a human and creating a Nephilim child?

“You have broken our most sacred oath, and the penalty is... death.”

In some sense, in 15x18 Despair, Cas is passing (unjust) sentence on himself, even as he sacrifices himself for the human he loves.

#Supernatural #15x18 #Despair #SPN meta #Meta #4x01 #Lazarus Rising #4x20 #The Rapture #4x22 #Lucifer Rising #13x05 #Advanced Thanatology #7x21 #Reading is Fundamental #12x10 #Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets

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whereflowersbloom · 4 years ago

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Meet me at the horizon

Damian has spent nearly three hours inside the meeting room of one of the biggest companies of the Eastern Coast, Wayne Enterprises, the silence was strong after several hours discussing the approval of new projects, majority of them Proposed by Timothy Drake. Tim was a genius in Computer Engineering and Technologies, currently working with Lucious Fox. He just graduated and was already making money developing enterprise digital assistance apps and what not for the company. Unfortunately the silence lasted less than two deep breaths as the board directors, shareholders, his siblings and even his own father were exchanging goodbyes and handshakes, scheduling the next meeting already. His father had promised to take Helena shopping with Selina. His adoptive siblings stayed in the meeting room, deciding to have a much-deserved break, to catch up with their daily activities.

Damian frowned unconsciously, his head was throbbing with the surge of scenes in his head. The scenes he was so used to see in his dreams for the last nine months, but the last three months have been assaulting him any moment of the day, especially close to his eldest brother Richard. The meeting seemed to have opened a door to these dreams and this talk about opening an office in Jump city was making it worse. Jump City. He had the vague sensation he’d been there before...

Tim, Richard and Duke seemed to be too busy speaking about the next big game of Gotham Knights, the hockey team, to notice his troubled expression. They mumbled something about asking Jason to slow down from his intense sportbike racer life and watch the game all together. Damian didn’t bother listening to the rest, he was attacked by images of that younger version of himself in some kind of flashy vigilante costume fighting criminals.

“We should go to the game this weekend. The girl I’m seeing now, Kori said she was interested in learning about traditional sports. She’s been in Gotham for six months now. She’s very enthusiastic about cultural learning.” Richard suggested with a wide smile to his siblings completely excited. Eyes like wildfire lit with the spark of life. He hadn’t met Dick’s girlfriend but he looked happier than he’s ever seen him in years.

“Are you joining, D or you’ve got a date?” Duke asked with a teasing tone in his sardonic voice.

Damian did not retribute the smile his adoptive brother gave him, trying to mask his still throbbing head. He looked at him, threatening gaze was a subtle warning. He didn’t know why this was happening that day, but the talk about Jump City and Dick’s new girlfriend were just bringing more of those images. Most of them weren’t good ones. Gory, brutal, bloody. He liked more the ones that seemed to joyful. The ones with that girl.

“He barely seem to have time to meet someone. He’s a workaholic.” it was Tim who answered with an amused smile on his lips, masking an exhausted mien.

“At this pace he’s close enough to become a celibate monk.” Duke joked elbowing Tim lightly, who laughed in response.

“I tried to set him up with some girls, but I almost end up with a broken jaw.” Dick shrugged slightly as he told them with details how Damian had turned down Kara Danvers, Tim’s girlfriend’s best friend. Admittedly she was a nice-looking woman but not the one he desired.

Damian decided to ignore the moronic comments about his love life from his siblings.

Storming out of the meeting room without uttering a single word. They knew nothing about his romantic life. Tsk. A breath of fresh is what he required, lost in consuming thoughts about the girl.

People form the company knew him as the extremely professional boss that run his department with an almost iron fist, he was fair though, accepting the situation of people that worked under him, but he didn’t accept people trying to take advantages or lacking in his services. And he was indeed workaholic.

The media knew him as the ��Ice Prince of Gotham’, the young heir that was always looking serious, with a cold aura around him, with no type of relationships or scandals so far. He didn’t have the bad boy aura like Jason, ‘chicks’ seemed to dig it as Duke would crudely express. He appeared distant of people out of his inner circle. However, women followed him like bees to flowers in order to collect nectar.

It was just his Wayne charm he couldn’t turn off, regardless of the situation. Like his father, Damian just attracted female attention like a magnet. But no girlfriend. He's had the odd fling here and there but nobody has ever really caught his eye and he's incredibly busy he hasn't the time to feel that maybe he's missing out. Until he saw her.

All his time, attention and passion have been poured into his work. Not that he loved it exactly but he's never been one to do things by halves. Of course he made time to spend quality time with his family, after all, little Helena was barely ten years old. Perky and tireless, too smart for her age if he added. EHis youngest sister.

He was also known in the sports world as one of the most skilled people on the art of the traditional sword fighting and martial arts. He didn’t know where this passion for sword fighting began, although he would bet all his money that it had something to do with his strange recurrent dreams.

Although his life was satisfactory in his personal view, he always felt as if something was missing. He felt as lonely as the teenager in his dreams when the girl was not around him. She was missing.

Why this bothered him so much, he couldn’t find a logical reason that made any sense. It was just a simple dream, and that girl wasn’t much more than that. A dream. But why he felt that way? That need to look around every time he was in a place full of people hoping to get a glimpse of those shinning amethyst eyes looking at him like she did in his dreams with such profound emotion. Or his necessity to look for her around the world as if he was sure he could find her. She was etched in his bones, buried in down his bronze skin, burning in his chest leaving him out of breath. The images were flooding his mind again. More than absurd dreams, they were a recollection of memories...from a different lifetime perhaps.

They had something briefly, he gathered from the persistent dreams. It was intense, passionate. It was only something he could describe as love. But suddenly they parted ways, forced to be away from the other. They lost contact. The images were so vivid. They felt so real. A first last kiss filled with sorrow, powerlessness, genuine affection. It was carved into his mind until he memorized it. That moment. The warmth and scent of her breath put him in an hypnotic daze. Her lips parted softly, and he could taste faint traces salt from her tears when her soft lips pressed against his. He could feel lightning coursing through his veins, as if his entire world had been set ablaze only lasting seconds. Then it was gone. The ghost of a promise of a second chance. He’d grown tired of waiting for her to appear before his eyes. Every damn second felt like an eternity in itself. With every passing moment, his patience waned a little more and his heart sank a little further.

The haunting pain, endless longing, fear of losing her, the regret of leaving her behind first. They were all real. It was a silent torture.

At first, foolishly he believed these feelings would eventually fade and he would no longer be haunted by her phantom presence. Only memories he thought as he closed his emerald eyes. And her pale, heart-shaped, beautiful face flitted across his mind. Damian had spent his entire life being in control. But every time he met her in his dreams, he seemed to lose his grasp on his emotions, his life, and sometimes, even his destiny. He had to find her.

The wind howling through halls of old memories, piercing through solitude, skin and bone until there’s nothing but heavy emotions and melancholy. Walking with a heart that’s taken too many hits, never too fragile but refusing to be held in the hands of another’s that don’t belong to hers. In his chest remained an ache, a longing for what was or could have been. What he let slip.

“I am sorry we did not have time, Raven.” He mumbled almost in a whisper to nothingness. It felt like a heartfelt apology a thousand years too late. Maybe more or less. A lifetime too late. If their hearts and destiny were entwined surely they would find their back to each other no matter what. Damian carried that hope in his heart, always his constant companion. If He were to walk to the ends of the earth and waited for her on the horizon after the sun has set, would she be there? At the point where the land and sky meets. Could they be together once again?

Raven. The girl. He thought of her during the long hours between dusk and dawn, as he ate dinner alone or read next to the window. She was an ever present fixture in his mind and never more so than today. He considered what he might say to her once he found her, but what rational excuse could he offer to a stranger? He doubted she would find comfort in the ridiculous phrases he might string together about meeting in a past lifetime or those dreams. What if she had them too? If it wasn’t some breathtakingly realistic illusion and she was so where in this city or Jump City or anywhere else looking for him. It was silly to entertain such notions, he knew it well. But that didn’t stop his mind from wandering from time to time when he found a poignant passage of poetry that tugged at his heart, or a new book that fascinated him. She loved books how he knew that, he was not sure. What he wouldn’t give to have long days spent indulging their mutual passion for literature, poetry, history and ancient languages.

He’s been walking around for longer than he imagined, looking at his watch it’s last 6:00 pm. It was out of instinct or some magnetic pull forcing his body to look at the flower shop, whatever universal spirit or energy did it. He was thankful. The shop was tiny, a sliver of space between a cafe and bookstore, and would have disappeared into the surrounding stone and woodwork had it not been for the white and lavender exterior. Eyes quickly scanning surroundings. It was exquisite and untamed, thorny blackberry brambles mingle with fresh citrusy kumquats wrapped languidly around overhanging light fixtures for a wild, yet utterly magnificent and unique look. It had a three-panel glass window boasting an avant-garde display of blush dahlias, blizzard hydrangeas, soft purple lilacs, a mixture of green stems and leaves that balanced everything out. He had been here before but never spotted the shop. The shop was definitely new and if Damian hadn’t known this neighborhood so well, the faint smell of fresh paint would have given it away.

Her hair was a deep navy blue sprinkled with white, like starlight in winter. Her heart-shaped had matured beautifully, moonlight skin. She was a flashing star born with striking surreal violet orbs. She was holding astilbe flowers in white and soft pink. She set the flowers on the counter carefully, her fingers hovering in the space around them, like she wanted to guard them, to protect every petal from the possibility of being crushed. As if they were more than blooms of colour, like there were uniquely cherishable aspects to each one that is not present in the next. He could see that type of caring in her. This was his Raven. This can’t be real, Right? The world wouldn’t be this cruel to him, playing mind tricks on him. She was here. O

Damian thought of every slow-motion, heart-stopping, head-spinning scene in every romance movie or show or novel and how he’d always assumed they were stupid, nothing but rubbish. But here he was standing astonished literally staring at the woman of his dreams. Speak with her. Just hear her low and calming voice. That was all his mind would permit him to focus on, the single-minded determination to see her again.

He moved with driving purpose, his legs propelling him to go inside the little store and tell her everything about his dreams, recollection of old memories. The thought crossed his mind so briefly he scarcely dwelt on it, but that was how it had been for him in the months since dreaming of Raven. His pace slowed as he was stopped by the entrance door, opening it slowly, willing his heart to steady the gallop rhythm of its beats. The sun was shining brightly through the shop’s windows, soft classical music played through the serene and scented atmosphere.

The anticipation rushing through his veins felt like burning his tongue on Earl Grey too hot-tea a chilly rainy day, a dry mouth after sleepless night tossing and turning because other side of his bed looked too empty, trees in the park swayed and shuddered by the afternoon air before lighting fractures the sky and shakes earth, like he’s been waiting a million of breaths for this moment. In his twenty-one years of existence never experienced this wild and frantic emotion.

He swallowed around a very dry throat when he let the door swing shut behind him as his short, hesitant strides brought him directly up to the counter. Now they were face to face. Mustering the courage to say anything. Anything that dint make her think he was insane. But when his gaze met hers. Damian found himself awe-struck by the intensity behind familiar amethyst eyes. The stars couldn’t compare. The world and moon would crumble away. The sun would collapse into itself at this dazzling and glorious constellation that she was. Lilac pools hiding something mystic and ancient in their depth.

She leaned in closer to him in such a natural way, raising her head just to meet his. Her smile was sincere and expectant, pupils blown wide, but they’re focused, dark and determined, nearly drowning out the violet glint of her irises. His lips ached to reach for hers in a hungry kiss but refrained. Speechless, heart pounding in chest, peculiar fluttering sensation in his stomach, waiting for her to speak. Finally she took a deep and long breath before whispering. “Hello Damian. It’s been quite a long time.”

I rewrote this and hope you all like it. I can’t find it in me to update stories right now but have this short prompt. Specially written for @chromium7sky @ravenfan1242 @xaphrin @alerialblu @niahti and all my friends and readers. I’m so sorry some of you have been getting hate but we stand strong and together. 💜❤️❤️🥺🥺

@deep-in-mind67 @kallura-juniblade @bourniebna @timid-soot-sprite @deepbreadlover @tweepunkgrl @srose-foxfire

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inanabsentia · 4 years ago

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They couldn’t tell how a half year spent obsessing over him, over destroying themselves had changed them, how those days had permanently transformed the person they were.

Ophelia

A sequel and alternative ending to an Overhaul x gender neutral reader in which Overhaul’s S/O commits suicide by drowning themself in the bathtub of their shared room. Except this time, he saw.

LINK TO OPHELIA ACT ONE

Who knew that silence could be so deafening.

He hadn’t spent much time with you ever since he had started taking on the project on producing anti-quirk bullets. No one could blame him though, he was one step closer each day to becoming the ruler of the underworld, the messiah who would illuminate light onto the detrimental impacts of the filthy heroic society which had overglorified quirks and their use.

It was his time to shine anyway, his time to bring glory back to the man who had raised him and the environment which invited him with open arms.

After all, what better way is there to pay back to his pops whom he holds close and dear to his heart? Even if that meant using underhanded methods.

Chisaki Kai Overhaul mentally went through the checklist In his mind, mulling over whatever he had accomplished during the day, pondering where he should go next. Right now though? Rolling in bed beside his Angel didn’t seem like such a bad idea though, he had missed—

Oh yeah...His Angel was patiently waiting for him in their shared bedroom, probably staying up late like most nights just to greet him. He should hurry up, he doesn’t like the sight those dark eye bags of yours as a result of waiting up late for him. His emotional side found it rather endearing this act of yours, but his logical side (which he used much, much more) was adamant on making sure that you were not sleep deprived because of him.

But that didn’t settle the feeling within him. That familiar feeling of dread, like the feeling that something terrible was about to happen. Kinda like that feeling when you knew a thunderstorm was approaching and you’re still in the middle of the woods, left unprotected without an umbrella and left at the mercy of the rolling thunderstorms and the downpour of rain which resembled sharp daggers piercing deep into your skin.

Yeah, something akin to that. He didn’t like that feeling though because his logic couldn’t seem to comprehend and explain this particular feeling. He’s tried to brush it off, focusing more on trying to make his way back to the shared bedroom between you and him. But he had to admit that the feeling never really went away, it just settled there in his stomach, a growing pit of trepidation and Fervor intensifying deep within him to the point he couldn’t deny its presence anymore.

His mind was convoluted with dark imagery of the worse possible outcome scenarios— his production coming to a sudden halt and the hardwork and research he’s put in years for being rushed down the drain. Pops never really waking up from his comatose state as induced by Chisaki Overhaul himself, never getting the chance to see the new profound glorify Overhaul had created within the Shie Hassakai.

But what about Y/N?

His Angel? The one person who had been by his side for the longest (asides Chrono), having been by his side during his best and his worst, illuminating his life and giving him a reason to keep striving forward, to keep going on. Your angelic presence alone had instilled something akin to excitement within him, he felt like he was 10 again, yet he feels this like he’s never felt for the longest time.

It was a good feeling though, it had warmed him and filled his entire being with serenity and tranquility. He liked the effect you had on him and he cherished you. He liked you, a lot and he wanted to rule his new future with you by his side, proudly standing tall next to the messiah of his shared vision, sharing the joyous moment of having been able to finally achieve it all.

But why did it feel so...off now? The joy he felt was only short-lived and that feeling of dread came back again. It came back to haunt him again, reigniting those horrific imagery (that he desperately tried to bury to the crevices of his mind), tormenting him, filling his entire being with chaos and madness. It felt wrong. If felt oh so wrong.

He reaches your shared bedroom and hesistates before reaching for the door knob, silently noticing how the light which peered from the gap between the door and the floor and become much dimmer. Of course, He was observant to the minute details, he had to be in this line of work.

And with the courage he mustered to twist the handle and push the door, the sight of the dimly lit bedroom greets him, the only light illuminating the room coming from the bathroom at the side. It wasn’t usual for his angel to be taking a shower so late in the night but then again, there were no sounds emanating from the bathroom.

No rain-like sounds from the shower head, no hard soap scrubbing sounds, no melodious singing coming from his angel, nothing.

Except for a few bleak and desolate water drops, falling into a mass of water.

It was eerie. It felt wrong on it felt so off.

Drip drip drip!

He inched his way closer to the bathroom, the room was so silent he could hear his heart palpitating and thrumming against his chest fervently.

Drip drip drip!

He noticed the unmade bedsheets, the solemn books left hapzardly strewn across the floor, very unusual from the methodical and neat way you would organise your belongings.

Drip drip!

“Angel?”

Drip!

And then his heart with absolute horror fills.

Time stood still. Who knew that silence could be so deafening. The sight of your desolate and despondent eyes greeted him, all devoid of life as life your very soul had been sucked all up, leaving behind a mass of human meat sack, waiting to be disintegrated into an abyss of nothingness. Your poignant expression to him made you seem like you just wanted to curl up and disappear into an air of absentia.

The painful moment which lasted for an eternity for both individuals finally seemed to end once he propelled himself forward and wrapped you into a tight and warm embrace, an oddly comforting gesture considering how cold you were due to how Long you had been sinking yourself into the bath tub of water, imagining it as if it were the large ocean, carrying you away from your woes whilst your worries melted and washed away with the tides.

Just a few minutes ago, you wanted to bring an end to your misery and life. Now though? You were glad he’s here and that you were here for this. And so was he.

“Oh angel..,” were the first words he spoke, his voice cracking which went by unnoticed by you due to how intimate the gesture was. Your warms tears soaking his already damp shirt, your fingers curling around his body as you squeezed the shirt behind him at the familiar term of endearment.

“Kai, I was only ever thinking about you, you know?” Your cries muffled as he pressed your face into his chest, cooing and soothing you as he listened to your misery. Oh how miserable his Angel must have felt! The guilt wrenched his heart and the feeling intensifies, now his own tears welling up in his eyes and threatening to fall too.

Deep down though he knew, he knew that he needed to express to you a love that’s reciprocated, a love that’s worth wanting. He needed to be better.

And he vows that internally to himself by gently grazing his fingertips underneath your eye bags to brush away the tears cascading down your cheeks. His lips shook and he struggled to find the words to say. But he had a inkling; a feeling that you understood he knew how much he had fucked up.

For some time, he was uncertain. But now, he’s sure that it was him and them. Them and him. And Hand in hand together, they’re floating through the cosmos.

END

Thank you for readin this! 😜

Link to another Overhaul x reader Semi-angst oneshot in which after losing his arms, Overhaul hallucinates his (non gender specific) S/O comforting him into a paradise far, far away, reminiscing about another universe where they are so in love. Entitled: Doleur Exquise

Taglist for this ff: (anyone may request to be included for future works too! I write for Dabi, Shiggy and Birdman!)

@snow99fire

@glassartpeasants

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sexyglances · 4 years ago

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The "Rapunzel" is a Lie in Run On

My favorite theme of Run On is that it is up to you to make your own happiness in life and that you have the full autonomy to do so, no matter what anyone else says. And my favorite ways the way the drama shows that is how a) that for your own happiness you must put yourself first in your own life, b) building a personal found family with real, caring relationships is important, and c) cherishing both yourself and your found familial relationships together is key to creating a truly fulfilling life.

The idea of a Rapunzel is mentioned a couple of times in the drama, and in a way, many of the characters could fit the role of a "Rapuzel." Seongyeom, Danah, and Woosik have all been stuck in their own lonely "towers" based on society's "rules" and expectations about how they should conduct their lives. And while they all have had someone come into their lives that has made a profound impact on them, none of these people had a Prince/ess Charming swoop in and save them from their lonely towers. Instead, their prince/esses have only been catalysts for change. They may have opened the door for the Rapunzels and encouraged them out of their towers, but in Run On, the Rapunzel has to make the active choice to leave their tower. Only by their active choices to redefine their relationships with themselves and with others are they able escape the confines of duty, obligation, and expectation and learn to live life and build meaningful relationships for themselves.

The drama started off with a lot of relationships based solely on pretense only, as if circumstances are what make strong bonds. But as the episodes go on, it's demonstrated that it's not the obligation of a powerful relationship that defines the strength of a relationship, but rather the relationship strength is determined by the actions a person takes in the relationship. In the beginning, we have Seongyeom surrounded by "strong relationships," a picture-perfect successful family, an elite track team with a renowned coach, and a sports agent that gets him in photo shoots and in the press. But as we delve past the outside illusion of these relationships, we see a family that is mostly absent from each other's lives, teammates and a coach that at best Seongyeom leaves at arms length, and at worst actively talk and scheme behind his back (and do even worse to Woosik), and even Danah barely knows Seongyeom on a personal level and openly admits their business relationship is used for her personal gain. Danah is in a similar situation where most of her obligate family/business relationships are trash as well, even if they look great from the outside; and she openly admits she has no friends either. Woosik is the lowly hoobae in his track team that doesn't have enough social capital at the time to stop his bullying or get the coaches to stop looking the other way from his bullying. All of these dynamics are based on the idea they must sacrifice parts of themselves for the greater (fucked up) system at large.

Then Mijoo enters the story. As an orphan she has had to build a found family for herself her whole life. Because she has none of those pre-determined familial obligations, and is a freelancer with no business to ruin outside of her own, she isn't beholden to the same rules of conduct that seem to be holding down Seongyeom, Danah, and also Woosik. Because she had to survive on her own, Mijoo learned early on that let herself out of her Rapunzel tower long ago. Waiting for someone else who might never come wasn't going to put the proverbial self-worth food on the table. Instead, she went out and foraged for those found family relationships herself.

The other great thing about when Seongyeom confronted his father was that it wasn't because Mijoo said anything about what his father had done or that she had encouraged any specific action in that case. Again, there's no "damsels in distress" here with a hero ready to take control (the "Rapunzel" is a lie!), it's about seizing your own life for yourself. Mijoo may be "[Seongyeom's] strength" but the way he stood up to his father in a way he never has before was done alllll on his own. Seongyom, the guy that was once considered "shameless" because he felt no embarrassment in the past when he did things is now actually feeling real shame and embarassment at how his father treats the people Seongyeom holds dear. The portrayal of a loving relationship resulting in self-actualization and autonomy an incredibly beautiful sentiment that isn't really portrayed in romance stories, at least not as explicitly and openly as it is in Run On.

The other thing I want to touch on is the running theme of embracing found families in lieu of obligate families in Run On. At the beginning of the story, Mijoo, while a bit of a loner, has a demonstrated strong relationship with May, and as the story goes on, we see most of her business relationships are also real friendships based on warmth and sincerity. That same sincerity is brought on as her relationship develops with Seongyeom and as she makes friends with Woosik, Younghwa, and even Danah (Mijoo's quips to Danah may be biting but they are sincere, haha). As Seongyeom learns to build his own sincere relationships with his own found family, we also see him bloom from someone with a husk of a social net, a person who barely ever put himself and his actual emotions out there, to a person not only with strong convictions for others but convictions in his actual relationships with others. He lets himself care for others and in turn that opens himself up to the genuine care others have for himself as well.

My favorite scene demonstrating this is after Woosik's training session when Mijoo and Woosik were sitting next to each other looking over the footage. Seongyeom looked at them, not with the detached observation he would have had in episode 1, but with a bit of jealousy tugging at his heart because he wanted to be included. And then he actually expresses he wants to be included, something that would not even cross the mind of the old Seongyeom to want or express. And Mijoo and Woosik's response? They immediately met Seongyeom with warmth, and they not just let him sit down, but sit with them. Like they literally moved and made room for him between the two of them as if it was nothing. Because unlike any relationships he used to have, Seongyeom being included warmly is a given with them. They have such a natural affinity for him, that they just automatically folded him into their interaction. It was such a small scene but it really demonstrated the growth these characters and their relationships have had. There's no room for jealousy here, but there is room for Seongyeom.

And lastly, Run On drives home the importance of cherishing both yourself and the people you care about in tandem for a fulfilling life. In episode 12 we have the scene when Mijoo told Seongyeom's father that Seongyeom is not an object that parallels when he in turn told his father that his sister and Mijoo couldn't be treated like objects either. Neither Seongyeom's or Mijoo's self-worth is defined by the other person standing up for them, hell, they didn't even know each other did that. But just knowing you have that emotional support in your life is a comfort that both Seongyeom and Mijoo know what is like to live without, which makes their convictions even stronger. They've felt life without that support so they do not want the people they care for to have to continue to be treated that way. Nobody deserves to be treated as a pawn in someone else's life. And they can both boldly stand up against this treatment of their loved ones because of their self-actualization (or at least partial self-actualization, they're not perfect) in how to extrapolate their self-worth and tie it into their strength of care for others.

What else is interesting is that at the end of episode 12 when Mijoo is upset because of her verbal tussle with Seongyeom's father, I thought we would get a parallel to Seongyeom in the beginning of the series, where Seongyeom sacrificed himself for others, he was always putting himself second. But in a poignant reversal, she broke up with him not as a sacrifice for him, but for herself, because she is the most important in her own life. This is due in part because she still has that automatic defense mechanism that she can only rely on herself in tough times. That defense mechanism of relying only on herself, however, also has the beautiful reversal of that she knows that she has to work through shit herself to make herself happy. A double-edged sword mounted in a hilt of self-worth.

"Must I continue seeing him at the expense of myself?" Mijoo says. Of course we know this is an emotional strawman argument but I love that Run On has a clear message that having to hide yourself in a Rapunzel Tower for a "caring" relationship means that relationship isn't based in care at all. She also says, "I value myself more than anyone else." Mijoo can't sacrifice herself for Seongyeom's toxic relationship with his father (not that Seongyeom is asking her to, but as an orphan she feels guilty for "coming between" Seongyeom and his father even though she is at literally 0% fault in that relationship mess). Younghwa won't change who he is for Danah, and in turn Younghwa doesn't expect Danah to put him before her either. Woosik can't let his self-doubt change him into someone who has no drive. Now that he's letting himself believe in his ability to recover, he has a better support system than he ever had in his former track team. And as far as Seongyeom is concerned, even all of friends, his new found family, (Woosik, the other track dude, Younghwa, and the former track coach he brought back to coaching) take his personality and his friendship for what it is, none of them are trying to change his personality or mold him into something he's not. They've all actually expressed acceptance and affection for his personality quirks.

The isolation of a "Rapunzel" state-of-mind is being dismantled for all these characters in Run On, and it is immensely fulfilling to see the characters grow as they leave their societal expectations behind and form fulfilling lives for themselves filled with people who love and support them. Self-actualization at its finest.

#run on #kdrama #meta #my meta #heh this started out as a 5-sentence-long post about the post-workout jealousy scene and spiraled #i have meta control problems lol #also i'm including seongyeom's bio sister as part of his found family bc their relationship is now an active choice #long post

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davidmann95 · 4 years ago

Note

Comics this week (11/25/2020)?

Anonymous said: This week's floppies?

Anonymous said: This week’s comics?

Anonymous said: Have you read Red Hood #51 yet? It’s one of the best stories Jason has been in since Under the Red Hood and I don’t think I can go back to his normal stories after this

Anonymous said: God damn the Other History of the DC Universe has a pretty brutal call out of Superman, yet as a Superman fan I wasn’t offended or put off by it at all. Ridley specifically narrowed in on one of the key flaws of Superman, his need for public love and approval. What did you think of the portrayal of Supes?

Anonymous said: Thoughts on "The Other History of the DC Universe" and why it's already one of the greatest comics of all time?

Anonymous said: Thoughts on "Other History"?

X-Men #15: Heck yeah, Quiet Council discussing protocol, this is what I come to Jonathan Hickman’s X-Men for, and Cyclops getting his Captain America in Hickvengers moment.

X of Swords: Destruction: Look this rules and I guess I understood the Arakko story by the end but not the Otherworld/Captain Britain stuff, and it’s the former that’s gonna matter to Hick-Men going forward. But I don’t care if it put a ‘_ of 22′ counter across the top, if a crossover is for real going to demand you buy 22 comics in 3 months for you to see the entire core story you need to be screaming that from the rooftops with every single interview that it’s genuinely the whole thing that’s essential, because editorial claiming that you should totally get everything aside that’s not how crossovers have actually worked since the 90s no matter how many checklists and reading orders may be provided. This whole thing really sorta felt like the Infinity of this run, good stuff but ultimately Hickman serving a master beyond telling his own story - in this case trying to provide a forcible on-ramp from Marvel’s hottest book to all the ancillary related stuff.

Shang-Chi #3: This continues to be a really solid little mini with some poignant bits.

Power Pack #1: Haven’t read much if anything with them in it before, but as good as I could have hoped of Ryan North’s first post-Unbeatable Squirrel Girl Marvel gig.

Fantastic Four: Antithesis #4: Fine, but it would have been so much funnier if Waid’s last Marvel work before finally returning to DC had been that cancelled Squadron Supreme two-shot.

Daredevil #24: God so goooooood. And next issue’s next week?!

The Department of Truth #3: Imagine going literally any duration back in time, handing this to someone who’d read and even enjoyed his work, and explaining “THAT’S the level James Tynion is going to end up operating on”.

BANG!: My shop got the TPB this week of the recent mini by Kindt and Torres, and this is a top-notch reimagining of assorted 80s action/pseudo-pulp archetypes into something modern and strange and delightful, that while technically concluding somewhat tidily if the sales aren’t there is set up to go on for as long as the creative team has ideas for it. It taps into that America’s Best Comics/Planetary/Adventureman energy for a slightly different branch of genre storytelling, and even if like me it’s not an iteration you grew up with it’s definitely worth your money and attention.

Dark Nights: Death Metal: The Multiverse Who Laughs: It’s fine, whatever, just a buncha little Dark Multiverse stories...except for the last story, where the Twilight Zone-esque shocker final twist is that being black in America and thereby constantly experiencing the constant low-grade terror of the background radiation of systemic racism essentially acts as a vaccine against Scarecrow’s fear toxin, which...okay??? It’s written by a black man so it’s not as if I think it’s offensive, but particularly given that given the rules of the Dark Multiverse one of the three characters in there had to have imagined this possibility, and that then The Batman Who Laughs must’ve seen it and gone “Hell yes, all about this, definitely one of the 52 scariest of all possible universe”, it’s a serious candidate for weirdest comic of the year.

Legion of Superheroes #11: This is an excellent kickoff to a 3 or 4-issue arc so I have absolutely no idea how it’s going to reach some kind of season finale next month.

Action Comics #1027: Romita Jr.’s deteriorating by the day but I did like his take on the Phantom Zone, and I feel like this while taking it a bit farther than I’d prefer still convincingly sells the idea of Superman just being absolutely fed up after a truly awful day.

Justice League Dark #28: So is this the end of the run, Future State notwithstanding? Shocking how coherently it held together through the transition in writers, and I really hope it says and so does Ram V to take it in a direction wholly his own.

Wonder Woman #767: Substantially improved now that it’s not working off the completely bizarre and increasingly uncomfortable ‘buddy-cop’ premise.

Red Hood #51: GOOD NOW?! I checked it out because of the rec above and because I was curious how someone would try and salvage the concept post-Lobdell, and while it obviously isn’t literally by him, Shawn Martinbrough and Tony Akins are for all the world doing a Christopher Priest Relaunch with this tonally and aesthetically; I think it’s even a direct sequel to Priest’s Batman: The Hill oneshot from decades ago. I sure hope this isn’t a two-issue filler run with the book either cancelled or reshuffled after Future State, because this has all the makings of an excellent crime comic.

Suicide Squad #11: I’ll probably check out Taylor’s Revolutionaries book once that happens, so I guess mission accomplished. Fine little run.

The Other History of the DC Universe #1: I heard someone on Twitter say this is the best thing that’s come out of superhero comics since HoXPoX, and I don’t know if I’m on that level with it but that is absolutely a fair conclusion. I’ll be honest, I had measured expectations here from having seen some of Ridley’s past comics work - I figured it’d be a perfectly solid book with a few standout moments, but instead it throws out all the haymakers in the world and emerges as one of my favorite comics of 2020, even given we’re only seeing the one issue this year. I can only judge so much because it feels like a lot of what we see in this debut is going to be completely reframed through the perspectives of other characters in subsequent entries, but standalone this is a brutal, intimate, brilliant character study set against the backdrop of a hazy dreamscape vision of the history of DC reformatted as needed to fit the concerns in play here (though the dates presented are so specific I wonder if aspects of this are leftovers of the original version of 5G), and probably as close as we’re going to see to a ‘trilogy capper’ to The Golden Age and New Frontier. That’s why the take on Superman here works, as much a product of the worst of his mass-consciousness image as the Superman of DKR but meshed with a profound understanding of what makes him tick as a character that makes the inherently compromised version on display here palatable, and a believable extrapolation of the Silver/Bronze Age’s version of him when that’s the era this series is thus far working as a contrast to. And god, the art. I always liked him fine enough, but even with finishes by Andrea Cucchi and colors by Jose Villarrubia I never could have imagined Giuseppe Camuncoli putting out the likes of this, and Steve Wands’s lettering is doing at least equal legwork in defining the look of the book. There have been several impressive titles out of Black Label at this point - Last Knight on Earth, Rorschach, Strange Adventures, and especially Harleen - but nothing else has come close to demonstrating the potential power of the imprint as a vehicle for creators taking this iconography and doing something radical and unrestrained and phenomenal with it.

#Week's Comics #Opinion

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bbrandy2002 · 5 years ago

Text

My Love

Chapter 8

Pairing: Liam and Riley

Book: TRH

A/N: Thanks @burnsoslow for the punctuation and grammar magic on the first half of this. The rest is all on me ... lol (Somehow, I got two college degrees with my shame). Also, @patriciaanchrist2019 , who has begged me for two weeks to get this posted ... here ya go :)

**This chapter is, by far, my most favorite thing I have ever written. I don't care if everyone hates it, thinks it weird or whatevs. It’s so different that I can’t get enough of it. After the next chapter, I have no idea where this thing is heading, but damn if I can't wait to find out.

___________________________________________________________

Liam clenched his fist so tightly, he felt the burning sting of blown veins and vessels that had earlier been penetrated by a needle forcing fluids into his hot blood. These same two hands that squeezed together in murderous rage were the same ones he had envisioned moments ago being wrapped around the exposed neck of his wife's recently discovered killer, gripped so firmly and securely, there would be no doubt that not one drop of air would enter or depart from her immoral lips. He needed to watch her fearful eyes beg him for the compassion and mercy she so callously cheated Riley of -- cheated him of. Instead, she had the audacity to stare back at him with an expression reminiscent of a blushing bride approaching her groom at the altar.

She looked at him with love and admiration.

He looked at her with hatred and scorn.

Somehow, amid this face-off, Liam would make damn sure those bright brown eyes that mysteriously beamed in the darkness of her chilly hospital room would soon witness the long-awaited wrath and vengeance he had waiting for her.

Riley had a million thoughts racing through her head all at once. The man she had loved and given her heart to in life was standing before her. His appearance was weak and frail; he wasn't the same muscular, strong, and cheerful man she remembered. Her heart sank further into her chest, wanting to hold him and make the hurt all disappear. Riley could only assume this change in Liam was a result of her death, and if he only knew that she was right there waiting for him to take her into his loving arms, it could change everything.

But how would she even begin to bring that up? Riley had never believed in such things, and Liam was far more realistic and pragmatic than even she.

For the moment, all she could do was play along.

Liam casually shut and locked the door to Riley's room before inching further inside. The moonlight cascaded a bluish glow through the window of the room as Liam ran a menacing hand over the hard plastic footing of her bed.

"Your Majesty." She spoke with a guttural whisper and bowed her head to him. "It's kind of you to come … although I am somewhat surprised you would visit me -- and at this late of an hour."

Liam stroked the scruff on his chin, never once taking his blazing eyes away from her. "I bet you are, Miss Talbert," he replied derisively.

Riley sensed the peculiar tone in his voice and demeanor; she wasn't sure what to make of it, never having seen him this way. She shifted curiously in her bed.

"Sir? Is there something --"

He raised his hand to stop her. "Never address me unless you are asked to. Are we clear?" The softness of her small, listless voice had no effect on him, nor did the gauze and bruises that blanketed her delicate skin.

"My apologies, sir. I … I was only trying --" she scrambled nervously, attempting to make sense of his bitter tone and attitude until he abruptly shouted an array of expletives and shoved her hospital tray across the room. Riley startled, and her eyes widened in panic as he whipped around to the side of her bed and placed his hands in the crook of her neck. "Liam! What are you doing?"

"You fucking bitch! Did you honestly think you could get away with it?"

"I don't understand! Away with what?" she wailed frightfully. Her tiny hands gripped both of his wrists in a desperate struggle to loosen his hold while her feet burrowed desperately into the mattress. This was not her kind, gentle Liam; this man's venomous glare could have pierced daggers straight through her.

"Don't you dare give me that bullshit! They found the cyanide. They know about your fake name … Victoria! Your relation to Amalas! We know it was you who killed Riley! I just don't know why … so I will give you exactly 30 seconds to spill your guts or so help me, I will do it for you!"

Riley's shaky hands left Liam's wrist and stretched over her gaping mouth. "It was … Amanda?" she muttered through shock and growing nausea that spontaneously transformed into her own personal anger and betrayal. There was literally no time to dwell on it or even think it through because Liam was mere seconds away from killing her. She knew how much he loved her. She knew he had every intention of doing so.

"You have 30 seconds, Amanda, to tell me why … why you took her away from our baby and me…" Liam's tone grew more somber, and his jaw began to quake. "She was … the best wife … the best mother … my best friend and queen … my love … and you … you took all of that away, and I just want … no … I need to know … why?"

Tears flowed heavily down Riley's cheeks at his poignant words, but the hurt and pain this woman had caused him were so tremendous and profound that she was appalled by it all.

And she was the cause of it.

"ANSWER ME! WHY?"

Her breathing was strained as she struggled for a response that would not only satisfy him but also keep her alive.

She decided to take a gamble.

"I know this is going to sound crazy --"

"I don't want crazy; I want the truth!" he snapped back.

Riley's glistening eyes gazed deeply into his harsh ones as she steadied her breaths. "Liam, I'm asking you to listen carefully to what I am about to tell you. If you will give me a chance, I can prove everything to you … I think."

Liam furrowed his brow; there was something oddly familiar about the way she spoke and looked at him. "I already have proof. There is nothing more you could possibly prove to me that will prevent you from your fate."

"I know you. I know your hopes … your dreams … your fears. Do you remember being on the balcony at Valtoria during the Lantern Lighting Festival? You asked what part of yourself you should let go of before you released it into the sky. You released your fears about being a good ruler. You questioned it so frequently that … it just made sense."

"How the hell did you know that? Did my wife tell you?"

Riley smiled affectionately. "I assure you … your wife would never betray your confidence like that."

Liam released his hands from her neck, more so out of curiosity over this new game he felt she was playing than thinking there was something more to her words. He glared at her with intrigue and crossed his arms. "What are you doing?"

"You have a tiny scar on your left elbow that you got from Leo when you were six years old. He pushed you into an armchair after you told your dad he swiped a questionable magazine from the former Duke of Karlington's chambers. You never told your wife about that."

Liam faked an amused laugh while he clapped his hands deliberately and with emphasis. "Thank you for taking me down this little road of memories. Did you wish to continue telling me private things about myself, or did you want to tell me what I ate for dinner the night before I married Riley?" he asked with a sardonic tone.

"You snuck into my room at the palace after the rehearsal dinner, and we had pasta with tomato sauce, just as we did during our first date at the Beaumonts' when you told me your greatest dream was to one day have a family."

"Shut up!"

"Liam … I know what Amanda did, but I need you to look past that right now and see who I really am."

"I said, shut the fuck up! You are not her! This is all just some terribly-planned scheme to play on my emotions, and it's not going to work."

"You hated the annual Regatta because the boat you and Drake snuck out onto when you were kids collapsed and you nearly drowned. Applewood was the only place you ever felt normal as a kid. You chucked a blackened salade Nicoise into a vase in Paris --"

"I'm warning you! Stop!"

"-- The combination to the wall safe in our bedroom is your mother's birth date backward, and the passcode to the arsenal is 20 numbers long, and only three people know it, but I can recite them for you right now if you wish … "

Liam stood silent and expressionless, but inside, his heart was thundering out of his chest, his mind cluttered with so many questions, he couldn't make sense of any of it. There is no way she can know all of this stuff.

Riley, however, knew that stoic expression all too well; it was the look he had when he was nervous and deliberating deeply in his thoughts. If she ever had the chance to at least have him seriously consider what she was trying to tell him, it was now.

"I know it's crazy … I know … but please look at me, and you will know. Amanda died in that park, Liam. I heard you this morning in our bedroom, begging me to come back to you before you collapsed, and I know it sounds completely and utterly ridiculous, but it's me, Liam! It's me … Riley."

__________________

Liam was discharged the following morning but couldn't get the words Amanda had thrown at him late last night out of his mind. As he rode in the limo back to the palace, he fumbled with the hospital bracelet that was still taped around his wrist and gazed thoughtfully out the window. He wanted to believe, yet at the same time, he didn't. Believing meant getting hurt by something so outrageous and unbelievable that he couldn't allow himself to go there.

After she made her final declaration stating she was Riley, he destroyed her room in a fit of rage, and guards had to break through her door to stop the destruction. Liam heard her terrified cries and pleas for him to stop before he hurt himself, but nothing could have upset him more than this woman trying to pass herself off as his late wife.

He couldn't help but wonder how she knew all of those things. Maybe Riley mentioned them to her during their short time working together; however, his wife would never tell this woman -- or anyone else for that matter -- their closely guarded secrets. Liam twisted his arm and glanced down at the tiny scar he had long forgotten on his elbow. He rubbed a finger gingerly over the nearly invisible mark, knowing he had never mentioned it to Riley. He didn't recall Leo sharing it with her during their brief encounters together, either.

She knew he collapsed yesterday while calling out for his wife. Amanda was found beaten in the park around that same time.

The only thing Liam knew for sure at this moment was that one of the questions that had haunted him for weeks had finally been answered: Amanda murdered his wife.

Liam walked through the door of his quarters and was immediately met with the sound of his daughter's hearty cackles and what he believed to be Maxwell blowing raspberries on her tummy. He rounded the corner and entered the living room suite, where he saw Maxwell holding Ellie in front of his face, tickling her belly with his nose. Drake was seated on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table watching X-treme Cordonian Monster Trucks and absentmindedly twirling Ellie's pacifier on one of his fingers.

Liam chuckled to himself. "It appears I'm missing one hell of a party."

Both Maxwell and Drake perked up at the sight of their friend looking at least somewhat healthier than he did yesterday and greeted him.

Liam lifted Ellie from Maxwell's grasp and sat on the sofa to snuggle her into his neck. Nothing felt better than holding her so tightly, smelling the scent of her lavender baby lotion, and hearing her excitement over being held and talked to by her daddy. He sat her down on his lap to face him and reached one hand around her back for support while he fussed over her.

Drake and Maxwell were surprised by his calm demeanor; they both knew Amanda had been named the killer. That was the only thing they knew. They gave Liam time to play with his daughter, knowing how much the two of them had missed one another. Ellie had become a daddy's girl in every sense of the word, and Liam didn't mind one bit spoiling the brightest spot in his life. She watched his face intently as he made silly faces at her, which in turn caused her to let out a quick giggle and for her chubby arms to flap wildly. Liam couldn't help but notice her eyes had that same familiar gleam he saw in Amanda's last night. Please look at me, and you will know.

Drake noticed the change in Liam's crestfallen face and cleared his throat. "What's wrong, Li?"

"Yeah, I noticed it too, Drake. Baby E always makes you happier, so what's up?" Maxwell asked as he passed Liam a fresh bottle.

Liam was reluctant to share what happened last night with anyone, but at the same time, it was all he could think about, and he really wanted the advice of his closest friends. With a deep breath, Liam told them about dropping by Amanda's room at the hospital. Both guys questioned why he would do that to himself after everything he had gone through yesterday -- and then finding out she was the one who took Riley's life.

Liam leaned back into the cushions of the sofa; Ellie was still feeding on the bottle he held for her. "I just … I needed to know why. I wanted to find out who she was working for."

"Did she tell you anything?" Drake asked.

Liam scoffed and nodded. "You could say that. She claimed she was … Riley."

Maxwell scurried over to Liam and placed his hands gently on Ellie's tiny ears, knowing what was about to be said.

"What the fuck?!" Drake remarked and clenched his fist. "I'll kill her myself."

Maxwell lifted his hands from Ellie's ears and scratched the edge of his brow. "She claimed she was Riley? What … I mean, why? Is it from her head injury?"

"Maybe … I don't know." Liam stood with Ellie still in his arms and walked to the fireplace. He glanced up at the picture of him and Riley that had been taken on their first trip to the Eiffel Tower during the Engagement Tour. "She knew things about our life … very personal, private things that no one else knew."

"Riley must have told her. Or, you were spied on." Drake countered.

Liam continued to study the picture, more specifically, Riley's flashing smile and sparkling eyes in it. He turned to face Drake and Maxwell with a thoughtful expression. "Let me ask you something, guys. Did Riley ever tell you what I wished for during the Lantern Festival, or … hell, even the combination to our safe?"

Both men were surprised by the oddity of his questions but answered together with a resounding no.

"If Riley didn't tell her closest friends … why would she share that information with a woman she barely knew?"

"Then you were spied on," Drake retorted.

Liam reflected for a moment, then twisted back around to study her face in the photo again. "She knew things that were said only to Riley in so many different places and different occasions throughout our relationship that there is no way it could have been incidents of spying. They were little, insignificant things ..." He closed his eyes and felt the first trickle of a tear roll down his cheek. "It just felt ... so real."

Visibly shaken, and noticing Ellie's eyes beginning to roll with heaviness, Liam insisted he was fine, excusing himself to put Ellie down for her nap and get himself cleaned up.

Drake reached into his pants pocket and pulled out his car keys before he eyed Maxwell. "What do you say about paying our little friend a visit?"

___________________

That morning, Riley was visited by another trauma counselor who wanted to discuss her feelings about the previous day's assault. Everyone, including Liam, wanted answers from her that she didn't have, and, most likely, never would. While sifting through a tray of cold scrambled eggs, she mulled over the betrayal by someone she thought of as a friend, and how it had so profoundly affected her husband. Riley was in an impossible position that she had no clue how to get out of. If last night was any indication, she was a trigger for Liam. Enemy number one. If she were to somehow get him to believe her, how would she face the onslaught of backlash from a country that was sure to want her punished severely for the murder of their queen?

For every question lobbed at her, Riley had her own.

Riley took a sip of her water. Over the small, plastic cup, she caught a glimpse of two familiar faces whose scowls implied they were no longer friendly. She placed her cup on the stand beside her and tucked a strand of her now golden-brown hair behind her ear. As she watched a timid Maxwell lean up against the wall closest to the door, Drake moved in closer to her with a look that suggested he was not there to catch up on old times.

She glanced between the two men who were like her brothers and plastered on a nervous smile. "Drake … Maxwell," she acknowledged.

Drake lowered himself into an exaggerated bow before rising again to his fullest posture. "Your Majesty … that is who you are, right? Or have you decided you're someone else now? Perhaps you can be my late dad or Maxwell's mother. Whatever gets you the most sympathy from someone -- am I right … Amanda?"

Riley closed her eyes, concern clouded on her features, and she turned her head away from him. "How is he, Drake?"

Drake scratched his neck and replied sarcastically, "Oh, he's just peachy. Got a lot to do, you know, with planning your execution and all."

Riley's hand shot to her mouth to stifle the laugh that threatened to escape. She didn't want to piss him off anymore than he already was, yet at the same time, she really did. "Since when did you start saying 'peachy,' Walker? 'Oh, he's just peachy,'" she mocked jokingly in his husky voice. "God, Drake … I love you sometimes, you big marshmallow."

Maxwell let out an uproarious guffaw and clutched his stomach. "You are a big marshmallow, Drake!"

Drake glared back at him. "Maxwell!" he shouted. "Who the fuck's side are you on?"

"Don't listen to him, Max," Riley goaded while she casually smoothed out the wrinkles in the blanket that covered her. "He knows you'd take a bullet for him." Realizing what she just said, Riley, cut her eyes to Drake and chortled. "I know, Drake. You actually did."

Drake furrowed his brows and felt a twinge in his shoulder. "Everyone knows that. It's public knowledge. Gonna have to try a little harder there, lady. Next thing you know you'll be telling me I drink whiskey."

Riley smirked. "Try a little hard, huh?" She perched her lips and nodded, not sure if she really wanted to bring the subject up after so long, but it was her best shot. "I can tell you something that no one knows about except you … and I."

Drake crossed his arms. "Try me."

"Tell me, Drake … what did you say to me after Tariq left my room at Applewood?"

Drake scoffed. "I didn't tell you, shit."

Riley tapped her chin playfully. "Hmm, I think you did. And again in the Beaumont Ballroom when we were arranging the flowers in preparations to host the court."

Drake remained silent, but Maxwell's ears perked up. "What'd you say, Drake?"

Riley raised her brows and motioned for him to answer.

Drake rolled a doctor's stool out and squatted down on it and dragged his feet closer to her. "Listen here! You are not, Riley Brooks. You are just some con-woman who somehow managed to weasel her way into working for her before you murdered her. Now … you're just some has-been, who is about to be blown out of existence. You're going to leave Liam alone, Amanda. He's been through enough already."

"You said, and I quote ... 'The way you look at me sometimes, Brooks, if we're alone together, I'm not sure I'll be able to stop myself from doing something stupid.'"

Maxwell's jaw dropped, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head. "Drake?"

Riley snickered when she noticed the red hot glow on Drake's neck, spread into his face. "My, my, Walker! I thought Olivia was the only one who could get your face that red."

Drake started to say something, then stopped himself. So many thoughts and feelings hit him all at once, and he didn't know what to make of them. What she was trying to assert was impossible, not to mention, absolutely insane. Drake felt like he was having a conversation with Riley. She had the same mannerisms, the same pattern of speech, the same way of annoying him, yet carried no resemblance to her. He stood from the stool and walked out of her room.

Maxwell stared at the closed door that Drake had just exited. He placed one hand on the door handle and let it linger there for a moment before he pulled it open. He paused and glanced over his shoulder. "I found something on the streets in Paris once. It was during the Engagement Tour, and something I really wanted but gave it to Riley instead. We were on the train …'

"...and Bertrand said, no. It was Chance, Maxwell … it was, Chance,"

With his hand still gripped loosely to the door, he turned slightly more to face her with a smile. "Maybe that's what I'm giving you again," Maxwell replied with a wink before he left.

____________

It had been one week exactly since Riley was admitted to the hospital. One week since she came back to this realm of life and found herself in a predicament she hadn't anticipated. Each day, she was questioned by the King's Guards relentlessly, in regards to the poisoning, and each day she continued to tell them she honestly didn't know what happened that night.

No one had visited, not even Maxwell, who she thought might stop in. Riley knew she had planted the seeds in Liam, Drake and Maxwell's mind, but wasn't sure if she was doing more harm than good. If Amanda was indeed the one who took her life, then she was confident that no amount of evidence she could provide would lift the need for revenge, Liam so desperately craved.

After seven days in the hospital, Riley was released into the custody of the Crown and placed in a cell.

Liam wanted a quick trial, and to end her charade rather quickly. He had spent several sleepless nights contemplating her words, as well as, the one's Drake and Maxwell shared with him during their visit with her. Maxwell was somewhat open to the concept of Riley somehow being present in the body of this woman, while Drake claimed he just didn't know. Neither one of them pressed the issue too hard, both stating it was something he had to figure out on his own. If she was telling the truth, and he doubted highly that she was, he felt as if he would know.

He didn't.

Liam sat in his office, glancing studiously over transcripts of the guard's conversations with Amanda the past several days. Every single discussion was nothing but her telling them she didn't know anything. He had grown tired of what appeared to be her failure to cooperate with this investigation. What struck him the most was her lack of ability to provide them with answers that had nothing to do with her case. Something as simple as her birthdate couldn't be provided, and she didn't even have a response to why she was in the park during her own attack. Doctors assured him the blow to her head was not damaging enough to cause memory loss, but perhaps the emotional trauma was enough for her to want those memories repressed.

Liam's cell pinged, and he read the message from Bastien stating that Amanda had just been placed in one of the palace cells. After directing Bastien to meet him in the interrogation room with her, he gathered the transcripts and put them in a manila folder to take with him.

Riley sat at a small table with Bastien sitting opposite of her. One-by-one, he went over the evidence they had accumulated against Amanda; it wasn't much, but enough to strongly suggest she was the one who poisoned Riley.

Liam stood in the corner of the room, his arms folded in front of him, listening to her give the same canned non-answers she had been spewing since the beginning. She didn't admit or acknowledge her part in the murder, but astoundingly, did not deny it either. He paced across the floor behind Bastien, listening intently to every word she said, hoping for a hint or clue that could be used against her. The room became cold, and an electrifying chill spread throughout his body as he felt her eyes following his every movement. He paused for a moment to collect himself and quell the burning ache that for a reason he couldn't explain, awakened in his stomach.

Liam placed his hands on the table between Riley and Bastien and leaned onto them. Beads of sweat collected around his brows, and the pounding in his chest could be heard by everyone in that room. He asked his head guard to stop his questioning and looked directly at the lustrous face of the woman who sat before him. His voice shook lowly as he glowered at her. "You are not my wife."

"Liam." Riley raised her hand to touch his face, but he grabbed her wrist before she made contact.

"I am the King of Cordonia, and you will address me as such!"

She quickly rose to her feet with her wrist still gripped tightly by his grasp. "Look at me, Liam! You know who I am … I can see it on your face!"

Liam clenched his teeth and shirked her arm away from him. "You're right, I know exactly who you are! You're the woman who took my whole world away from me!"

Riley shook her head and waved an arm up and down the length of her body. "Yes! This is the body of the woman who took that away from you, but she's gone, Liam. She's gone!" Riley swallowed hard and tried to steady her nerves. "I heard every word you spoke to me! The blame and anger over leaving you alone. The lingering questions of how I was doing, if I was with your mother, how you would tell Ellie about me … I heard every damn word you whispered to me every single day and I fought like hell to come back to you … to our daughter! I'm here, Liam!"

"Goddamn, you!!" Liam turned and jerked Bastien's gun from his side holster and placed the tip of its sharp barrel against Riley's temple. "Bastien! Get the fuck out of here now!"

Riley froze where she stood while Bastien questioned frantically, what his boss was doing.

"I said, get out!" he seethed.

Bastien feared more for Liam's mental state than he did for what he assumed was about to be the execution of the woman who killed his Queen. The King was teetering on the edge again, and he questioned to himself whether Liam was thinking this method of justice through. At that moment, he had received his orders and exited with great hesitation.

Liam shot a look to Riley, his breathing was erratic, and his hands trembled. "I want your confession now!"

Riley didn't know for certain whether Amanda was guilty; she more than likely was, but seeing Liam like this was more than she could bear. If killing her right now brought him closure … gave him the chance to move on … took just a tiny amount of his pain away, then she would give him what he wanted.

"I just want you to be happy. It's all I ever wanted. And I can't tell you whether or not Amanda did this, but … I will confess on her behalf anyway."

Liam flipped the safety from the gun and affixed his finger firmly on the trigger. "Any last words?"

Riley clasped her hands over her stomach and put on a brave face. Her teary eyes looked at him resolutely and peace he hadn't expected. This woman was prepared to sacrifice herself for him, and it was quite obvious, she was perfectly content to do so. She smiled softly with a sincere flash of faith and love in her eyes. "I love you, my King. I always have …'

Liam's eyes swelled with a flood of tears as the gun dropped to his side.

"And I always will, my love ... Riley?"

#liam x mc #liam x riley #trh #the royal heir #My Love #bbrandy2002

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veronicamarsconfessions · 4 years ago

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I was hugely excited by the announcement that a fourth season of teen noir show Veronica Mars was going to be made, nearly fifteen years after the show’s initial air date (and cancellation after three seasons), and five years after the crowdfunded movie came out. As soon as the show dropped on Hulu (or Stan, if you’re in Australia like me) – a week earlier than initially slated, I rushed to watch it. And I was so distraught by the ending that it genuinely took two days for my mood to return to something even vaguely resembling ‘okay’.

For those of you who haven’t seen it *SPOILERS FROM HERE ON*,

season four has Veronica (Kristen Bell) chasing down a serial bomber who seems to be trying to destroy the Spring Break business in Neptune. It turns out that the first bomb was set by property developer ‘Big’ Dick Casablancas, trying to destroy the Spring Break business in order to buy the waterfront properties cheaply, and the subsequent bombs were set by a pizza delivery man, Penn Epner (Patton Oswalt), who fancies himself a detective and is out to find glory after he is initially ridiculed for his public accusation of an incorrect suspect. The season itself had several issues (one of them being some seriously murky motivations behind Epner’s behaviour, like, if he really was that much of a genius, why was he a pizza delivery man?, and that the people ultimately behind the crimes are more or less ‘hidden in plain sight’ all along, which is a disappointing departure from the way the initial seasons cleverly hid the villain until quite late in proceedings). However, the issue for which there is not enough therapy in the world to appease me is the season’s last-minute killing off of reformed bad-boy and Veronica’s long-time boyfriend, Logan Echolls (Jason Dohring), right after they finally got married.

Series creator and showrunner, Rob Thomas, justified this decision by saying ‘I know this seems crazy or harsh but Veronica is at her best when she’s an underdog and I don’t know that there’s much to root for if she’s now got a perfect relationship. I need to keep her fighting and I need to keep her a little bit uncomfortable in order to have a show. There’s nothing funny or interesting about perfection.’

Except that’s a deeply flawed understanding of how relationships function, and a deeply messed up thing to push on to people.

It’s fair to acknowledge that once the ‘will-they-won’t-they’ is resolved, TV shows often decline in quality, or at the very least, significantly depart from the original formula which made them into such beloved hits at their beginning. But there are two significant issues with this: First, the assumption that TV shows must remain the same in order to be good. There are some interesting observations that the job of the sitcom episode (in particular) is to return all characters to more or less their original starting points. While that is broadly true, TV shows, like life, need to evolve in order to stay interesting, and as across seasons, audiences grow alongside the characters they watch evolve and mature.

Nevertheless, it was fair for Thomas to note that the characterisation of Veronica is someone who is embittered and cynical about people’s fidelity and inherent goodness – after all, when we first meet her at the age of sixteen, her best friend has been brutally murdered, she’s been raped, her alcoholic mother has upped and left, and her adored father and moral compass has been socially ostracised for a) doing his job and b) being not super wealthy. It’s a lot. Veronica’s very understandable trust issues are compounded by the moonlighting she does as a P.I where, to she regularly sees people cheating on one another and generally behaving in unpleasant ways. So it’s reasonable to point out that for Veronica, the notion of the ‘happily ever after’ is a deeply uncomfortable one. But to keep her in the same mindset as she was at aged 16 is to deny her the capacity to grow as a character.

It’s fair that there was a desire to avoid repeating the pattern previously established (withdrawn/bitter etc), but – and here is my ultimate point – that could have been avoided.

Some of the most complex and interesting storylines come from couples who get together and have to navigate relationships; compromising to fit together, find a way to make it work. Think about the evolution of Niles and Daphne’s relationship in Frasier (and leave aside some of the aspects to his earlier infatuation with her that seem distinctly distasteful in a post-#metoo world). While much of the humour between them in earlier seasons was because of his unrealised ardour for her, after they became a couple, the hardships they navigated through being a couple, and the deepening richness of their relationship that was both romantic and based in friendship, produced some truly hilarious moments. Similarly, one of my (and our fabulous Chief Nerd, Elise’s) favourite TV shows, Chuck, *SPOILER* has the two leads get together in season 3. The show was no lesser for that fact because as Chuck and Sarah’s relationship deepened, they explored facets of themselves that they hadn’t previously shown – it provided more material for the writers, not less.

One of my favourite articles on the ending of Veronica Mars, season four, pointed out that Logan has the most interesting character development because he works to better himself – he has come a long way from the miscreant teenager who organised ‘bum fights’, and he had the potential to become an even more interesting character. How this interacted with Veronica’s cynicism could have provided significant fodder for more story.

But, giving full credit to Rob Thomas for a moment here, the show is called Veronica Mars, not Logan Echolls. So the decision to axe Logan was made to push Veronica’s character development forward, especially given the shows position as a gender-flipped noir which so often has the embittered, cynical detective dealing with the ongoing pain of a tragically killed love.

But the problem is that I can’t actually see how this is going to do anything but ossify Veronica’s primary characteristics: bitter, a hardnosed and reckless desire to catch the bad guy at any cost. Moreover, in most of the noir detective stories, this love has died before we meet the hard-bitten detective.

Thomas said to The Hollywood Reporter, “Moving forward, we’re going to really build around [the idea that] the case is the thing and less of the soap opera of Veronica’s life.” Except Veronica Mars is all about character. Her interactions with her father, Keith (Enrico Colantoni) and the genuine bond of affection between them evokes some of the show’s most poignant interactions. Her internal struggle when the pursuit of justice comes up against questions of morality is inherent grounded in her character. One of its most interest aspects across the years is that Veronica is often wrong. She falsely accuses people (including Logan himself), she behaves badly, she takes her friends for granted, and she can be reckless to the point where she endangers herself and someone has to come in and rescue her (case in point: wandering into the base of an Irish gang that had a particular grudge against her father). So to strip away the elements to the story that allow for depiction and consideration of those complexities would be to lose much of the show’s point.

There’s also a part of me that feels the way in which Logan was killed feels personal. Logan and Veronica were never initially meant to get together, but in the first episodes, the chemistry between the characters, and Kristen Bell and Jason Dohring was so profound that it was written in. I might be putting on my tin foil hat to say this, but it feels as though Thomas resented the manner in which LoVe became such a pivotal part of the Veronica Mars ‘brand’. What really underpins that for me is that the way the series sent off other characters was considered, and gave them a certain ‘exit’. The way in which Logan was killed off feels almost like an afterthought, made more so by some of the questions that arise from the manner. How did he know that she would be in it when it actually blew up? Moreover, the convenience of him leaving a voicemail for his therapist about why he wanted to marry Veronica (why exactly would he call his therapist to tell him about his epiphany? Who has that kind of relationship with their therapist?), and this woman’s decision to keep it from Veronica for a year seems weirdly contrived. Because it was.

However, to be fair, one could claim that the season mistreated some of its other characters, too. Tina Majorino who plays Cindy ‘Mac’ Mackenzie specifically noted that she did not want to return because she did not want her character to be sidelined. Similarly, the complexity to Eli ‘Weevil’ Navaro’s character was stripped away, as was the depth of his relationship with Veronica. What’s worse is that this could have been a really interesting storyline; why he decided to walk away from the court case which would have seen him awarded with compensation for what happened to him in the movie. While we are told that his wife left him along with his child, prompting him to return to his old gang-running ways, the depth of his grief and the reputable life he lost were never really portrayed. Honestly, I would have preferred that rather than the convoluted storyline that involved Mexican cartel hitmen.

But beyond my argument as a writer as to why Logan’s death was a totally unnecessary element to bring in, it also feels like a real slap in the face to fans. I’ve previously talked about the relationship this show has with its fans. Realistically, season 4…hell, the movie, only existed because of the love and support fans showed the show.

Any narrative material exists to interact with fans. Obviously, there is a fine line that can cross into blatant pandering, and there is also a trend that offers a ‘gritty’ or ‘sad’ end (ie the tragic death of the lover), but it’s a balance.

The Veronica Mars movie was very much fan service – it was, after all, fan funded. Much of the movie’s contents and storyline were determined by what Thomas was seeing from fan comments on social media, noting “I did have an idea of things people wanted to see, characters I wanted to get an appearance in, whether it felt extraneous or not.” He added, “there’s no way in the world we would have had a fan-funded movie and I would have killed Logan,” he added.

In the same interview, he said, “I fear that leaning into the high school soap that the show started out as is a losing proposition, that it will start feeling nostalgic rather than vital. If Kristen [Bell] and I want to make more of these Veronica Mars mysteries, I think it’s going to survive best as a true mystery show with a badass PI at the center of it, and I think that works better if the PI doesn’t have a boyfriend.”

Yet for a show whose who schtick was challenging the noir detective genre, it seems the prospect that someone fundamentally gritty and damaged can also have a relationship that the struggle to be healthy was simply a bridge too far.

And at the crux of it, what really frustrates me – as a fan, and as a writer – is that for Thomas, it simply felt too hard to give Logan and Veronica an enduring relationship, and it if wasn’t too difficult, then he perceived it destroyed some fundamental part of the show by making it emotionally sappy. If that’s the dichotomy in which Thomas thinks, then Veronica Mars is no longer the show which attracted its die-hard following of fans and may as well be a different show with a similar premise.

#Veronica Mars #Rob Thomas #Kristen Bell #Logan Echolls #Jason Dohring #news

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idontfindyouthatinteresting · 5 years ago

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Death Stranding: A Love Letter

Death Stranding, we’ve been waiting for you for a long time and to be honest there were times where we thought, we’re never getting this game, it just isn’t going to happen. I had this game on pre-order for over 2 years. 2 YEARS! The expectation level was obviously very high, and from my perspective it firmly... delivers.

WARNING - SPOILER ALERT - This is a review/breakdown by someone who’s finished the game, for people who have finished the game. You have been warned!

Death Stranding revels in it’s cinematic credentials constantly and with intense consistency. From panoramic mountainous vistas which you can control, to dazzling close ups of it’s digitally recreated stars, to just watching Sam go to his Private Room. It’s stunning and a testament to Kojima's cinematic knowledge with every shot.

Not only does Death Stranding handle this beauty, and intricate world building and story telling with ease and grace; it’s concepts and emotional ideas (which I’ll go into more later) are translated so strongly that you can’t help but get swept up in it. This is the sort of experience that I’m used to getting from films, who embed this framework within their narratives so deeply, in a way it’s expected. Death Stranding hits you like a freight train. Through the power of the performances, the narrative and the fresh nature of the ideas it’s portraying.

Death Stranding’s emotive credentials are set firmly in 2 scales, the more typical big stuff, saving the world, stopping the extinction, well trodden video game territory. But where it truly sets itself apart, embodied so perfectly when Sam walks away from Die-Hardman’s Inauguration speech, and sets to surprise is in how it handles what could be argued to be the smaller scale stuff.

Sam’s emotional world is rich and powerful, from his Aphenphosmphobia to the fact that we see him openly weep and break down holding a crying child. This is a male lead in a video game, and as a woman I loved seeing Sam being so vulnerable, to the point where he’s physically naked in those shots (ssshhh, there are academic reasons too.) It’s fresh and poignant, and as a woman it gives me access to media rejecting the male gaze so completely.

On the notion of the Male Gaze, there is some stuff to unpick about the game’s female characters, as much as I would have loved to have seen more, with some ethnic diversity also, it doesn’t subject it’s women to typical video game stereotypes. The creators of the network (whatever it’s true intentions) are all women, Amelie found the path through the country to place the terminals, with the hardware and software created by Mama and Lockne respectively. This network is recognized as the saviour of humanity, the only male input is Sam connecting the terminals with the Q-pid, a Q-pid created by Mama and Lockne. Fragile is the only character powerful enough to get Sam and all the other characters to where they need to go through her DOOMs. I think the shows opinion on Male Gaze is shown in the story, when Fragile is using Sam’s shower, and Sam moves to the glass, his intention is to see her timefall damaged skin, but Sam is punished for it by Fragile as he questions her motives, she’s aggressive and she puts him thoroughly in his place for it. I love love love the physical powerplay in this scene between them.

Sam is reluctant, profoundly unhappy, arguably suicidal, and is convinced to do all of this purely to help save his friend. Sam is a constant reminder that there is so much more at play here, drilled home every time he flinches away or holds Lou in his hands. Although there is a world to save, it can be for nothing unless you save yourself too. Sam and Fragile’s final discussion brings this home. Before leaving to stop Amelie Sam is full of hope, but in losing Lou, he does a 180, he’s just a man getting to the next sun rise. Something I’m sure a lot of people can identify with.

This narrative nuance is reflected in Cliff. Through the memories we’re shown a man just trying to save his child, not the world, not willing to sacrifice his child to be made into the activation code for a city, no matter the cause. He just wants to be a father and that is his driving force. Mads Mikkelsen was my gateway into this particular world, safe to say I have an intense soft spot for him. I can go on all damn day about how talented he is. He’s the best in the business, no one does what he can, no one else can give a performance that is so real and so raw but so full of fight. Mads can take the your most profound story line, otherworldly in it’s extreme, and he embeds it so firmly in the human experience, you’ll never be able to untangle that web. That is why his ability to do what he does can almost never be questioned. You let him get to the heart of your story and that is what he’ll do to it and that is why it works. Mads Mikkelsen could easily have been Higgs, based on early trailers we suspected he was Higgs, but he isn’t. Could not be further from it.

Death Stranding’s narrative dichotomy in this way is resembled perfectly in the games two ‘Boss’ characters, Cliff and Higgs. Higgs represents the greater plan, the end of the world stuff, and Cliff the smaller scale human to human emotion. Sam must overcome both.

Death Stranding has an even wider scope, an even wider message. Kojima hasn’t been shy about his message of connection being prominent and poignant in the current political climate, being from the UK I feel this so keenly, but the same is present in the US as well. Humanity driven further apart, through legislation, walls and boarders. You can see the potence of the message being translated through a video game, when alternate reality, video game violence and social media is being blamed for these things. It’s fighting back in a way. Death Stranding’s gameplay is full of positivity, from the signs that other players can leave you that replenish your stamina, make your BB happy, to the fact that if you knock a MULE out in water they have a neck float so they don’t drown and die.

The lack of violence in this way and use of ‘non-lethal’ guns, which are described as such, were again refreshing. I’m not a first person shooter gamer, never have been, could not be less appealing to me if it tried. But Death Stranding doesn’t just have a gun aversion, to me it is explicitly anti-gun. Again another important message, particularly when the game is set in the US. One of my favourite moments in the whole game is Sam listening to Die-Hardman’s grovelling apology for his actions, his thoughts and his prayers, only for Sam to shove the gun Die-Hardman brought to the Beach back at him, warning him with disgust at his actions, by passing on the message, “that gun won’t work here” and walking away. I completed a video game without taking a single human life. It rejects the notion so fully and completely. You stop the extinction, save humanity, not with a gun but by hugging Amelie, reminding her about how valuable human life is, every human life. It’s not to be thrown away, you need to give it a chance to bloom.

In Death Stranding humanity is left cowering underground, separated by an invisible enemy in the form of BT’s, it has to learn to fight back, with literal blood, sweat and tears. If you couple the notion of the invisible enemy with Bring Me the Horizon’s ‘Ludens’ Lyrics:

Sticks and stones may break my bones but soon the sting will pass But names can dig so many graves, you won't know where to stand

I love this line. (BMTH wrote that song in 5 days to get it into the game in time, by the way!) As children we’re taught that names shouldn’t hurt us, but actually they do. In a time where the effects of racism, sexism, homophobia, all of this “name calling” are putting people in their actual graves, these lyrics should be heard more keenly. Political leaders put people in their graves with their words, through direct or indirect means. These words are the BTs of our world, invisible hands which destroy people.

Some of the criticisms of the game are based on elements of game play, like the deliveries you need to make, as slow and tiresome. Higgs himself addresses this asking whether you’re tired of the grind, begging for a “game over”?

The game is not only acutely aware that perhaps trudging all over the US with vast cargo loads isn’t what you want to be doing, but it knows it’s what you need to do. And truly, in what way is that different from shooting your way through levels and scenarios to get to the end? Death Stranding makes you feel the sacrifice Sam is making and you experience that with him, every time you fall and drop your cargo, every time you stumble down a mountain side, every time you wreck your stamina bar climbing an incline. Video games can’t really make you feel what it’s like to kill an enemy soldier with an air strike, but hell it can make you feel frustrated at having to climb another mountain with a boat load of heavy gear.

Death Stranding rejects the idea of a ‘game over’ and other video game staples in other ways, it mockingly calls Higgs and Cliffs narrative end “Boss fights” and when Deadman says that wiping Lou’s memories, her connection with Sam in order to make her work better than a piece of equipment is just a ‘do-over’ a reset, normal, Sam rejects that it’s not that simple and Norman’s performance brings that home acutely. It’s not just a game.

From style, to message, to performance, to rejection of the Male Gaze, Death Stranding is an intense and beautiful game. It managed to hook me so thoroughly (as I’m sure you’ve been able to tell from my live tweeting/blogging) and I don’t imagine I’ll get the hook out of my heart for a while. It speaks to something higher and I love it for it.

Keep On Keeping On.

#Death Stranding #Hideo Kojima #Norman Reedus #Mads Mikkelsen #Sam Porter Bridges #Clifford Unger #mine #OPINION ALERT #long post

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itsthegameilike · 5 years ago

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Best of 2019 Reads

I didn’t get to read quite as much this year as I usually do, but I wanted to collect my favorites, anyway, because books always deserve more love. The most love. Without further ado...

Call Down the Hawk--Maggie Steifvater (lgbt) While this book works best if you’ve read The Raven Cycle, I do feel as though it stands alone and separate from the series. It’s magical and intense and profound and it was one of the few books this year that I absolutely devoured. The new characters are fabulous, especially Jordan, and Declan absolutely shines. If you read The Raven Cycle and weren’t sure about this one, it’s worth reading just for Declan. The stakes are high, the dreams are marvelous, and the ending leaves you ready for more.

On Earth, We’re Briefly Gorgeous--Ocean Vuong (lgbt) I first discovered Ocean in one of my poetry writing classes in college and I never looked back. The way Ocean sees the world is spectacular. The lowest lows are part of his life experience and he transforms them into sublime beauty. His first novel is no different. While largely plotless, more vignettes than anything else, it transformed how I thought of the world for weeks. And there are more than a few passages I’ll never forget.

The Starless Sea--Erin Morgenstern (lgbt) Like everyone, I could go on and on about The Night Circus, her first novel, and like, I expect, everyone else, I can say with confidence that this book didn’t disappoint. There’s underground libraries, time travel, whimsical romance, an ocean of honey, and secret societies. If I could dream up the perfect novel, more than half of the tropes included in this novel would be in it. It does what the best fantasy does; actually transports you from your living room to a different world, just for a little while.

Small Gods--Terry Pratchett The first of my recs that wasn’t released this year. I read lots of Terry Pratchett this year but this was by far my favorite. There’s nothing quite like a god who’s been transformed into a turtle and only remembers he’s a god because of the belief of one simple-minded but kind person. Organized religion is examined with care and as with all Pratchett novels, hilariously. The novel finished and I felt like I’d learned more about life than I’d learned in six months of actually living.

A Winter’s Promise--Christelle Dabos This novel is complex and the worldbuilding is extensive and complicated, but the rewards of paying attention and being committed are high. The characters are spectacular, though it takes some time to reveal their many motivations, and the world is even more so. The side characters also shine as every single written character has a decided motive. I devoured this one as well and the second in the series is even better. I would argue if you don’t like the first one, you should still try the second, that’s how good it is. All of the work of the first novel pays off in the second.

On A Sunbeam--Tillie Walden (lgbt) A lengthy graphic novel set in space with some excellent queer representation. It’s been awhile since I enjoyed this one, but I read it in one sitting. The drawings were beautiful and the colors were perfect for the tone of the story and writing. The love story between the two main girls is sweet and soft and heartwrenching and it was perfect to be wrapped up in their world for a little while. This book is like briefly being trapped in a snowglobe.

Spinning Silver--Naomi Novik I enjoyed Uprooted more than I enjoyed this particular fairytale retelling, but it was still worth a read. The main character is resourceful and interesting, the way she goes about navigating world and finding love not quite the path you would’ve expected in the beginning. The world is lush and well developed and the court of the fey is one of my favorite locations in a fantasy novel in awhile. What really sells this book is the ending. The middle can be slow, but it was worth it for the way all the threads come together.

Nevernight--Jay Kristoff I could talk about this novel for-fucking-ever. There are footnotes that can be extremely informative and are often laugh out loud funny. The violence and the language and the jokes can often be crude, but there is so much joy written into them that it hardly matters. The twists and turns of the plot are amazing and there was even one or two I didn’t predict. Mia is such a badass and her quest for revenge is the kind of quest I love to see female characters involved. She gets a storyline few women get, especially in fantasy. Godsgrave, the second novel, is also incredible and puts Mia in an awesome queer relationship. The last novel, Darkdawn, came out this year and was actually a bit of a disappointment, but the series overall is still one of my favorite.

Devotions--Mary Oliver Everyone knows Mary Oliver and I’m not going to pretend this recommendation is revelatory in any way, but this collection got me through some of my hardest days. It’s best read a poem at a day with a good five minute think afterward. You’ll start seeing the world in a different and more hopeful way. Nature has lots to teach you, kids, and so does Mary Oliver.

The Trials of Apollo--Rick Riordan (lgbt) This is a whole series and the fourth one came out this year and if you haven’t read any Rick Riordan this probably isn’t the place to start. But if you’ve read some of him and haven’t yet checked out this series it’s a must. It’s more adult than any of his other ones and the stakes feel so high, that when I started reading the fourth one this year, I could barely do it, I was so nervous. They’re hilarious, as can be expected by Riordan, but they’re also profound. There are a couple of emotional moments that I still get lost in while lying in bed at night and Apollo’s character arc is one of the most rewarding in recent memory.

Red, White, and Royal Blue--Casey McQuiston (lgbt) A favorite of the year on tumblr, I think, and definitely worth all of the hype. I read this in one sitting. It was quick and easy and joyful, definitely an alternate universe that I would prefer we were currently living in. Alex and Henry are both delightful and their romance is poignant, something that gave me comfort as a queer woman. If you need a little light in your life, start here.

Little Fish--Casey Plett (lgbt) One of the hardest books I read this year. It’s an intense look into the life of a trans woman and her friends, most of whom are also trans. And when I say intense, I mean intense. It often hurts. But I loved it for the way the author portrayed her main character. There was so much love and sympathy there. Nothing was held back. It was very clear that this book was the heart of this author. It meant everything to them.

Snow & Rose--Emily Winfield Martin A children’s fairytale that world builds so good that none of the rest of the book even matters. The rest is also good, but I could’ve gotten lost into the world forever. As with all fables, it ends with lessons learned and they’re important and earned lessons. It’s been awhile since I’ve read it, but I remember it being spectacular and well worth my time.

Peter Darling--Austin Chant (lgbt) Not the most well-written on this list, but it is a hopeful read. And the most adorable. This book is entirely for the queer representation, but it is very good representation. It also is a retelling of Peter Pan, which is good fun. It’s short and quick and I finished with a huge smile on my face.

#book rec #end of the year #call down the hawk #rwrb #nevernight #these are all definitely worth a read trust me #and a lot of what I read this year was not so

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