#nothing has made me hate school more than junior year | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cupidevanesco · 2 years ago

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ALL OF THE GIRLS YOU LOVED BEFORE. | ksm.

➨ pairing: kim seungmin x SHS!reader.

➨ note: not proofread, highschool x forbidden love trope.

➨ word count: 7.5k

Seungmin was known as the biggest asshole among the juniors and seniors in highschool. No one knew what he was up to, breaking all these girls’ hearts and all.

so I wondered, how did I manage to make him treat me like this?

I walked around campus for a little while as classes have not started yet. I still had two hours before studying and had absolutely nothing to do, so here I was, walking around, kicking dried leaves that fell from trees.

i stopped in front of a big tree, this was my signature place.

I sat on the bench that was under the tree and took a book out to do something to entertain me. As much as I wanted to take my phone out and chat with people, I had no one to chat with — which left me no choice but to read.

It's not like I was reading something educational; I was reading fiction.

this school year had been tough for me, my class rank went down from first to fifth, I stopped being a people pleaser which made my friends progressively leave me, Day by day.

It’s fine, it's the last year of senior year anyway.

But other than that, I was focused on one person, and that was none other than Kim Seungmin.

me and seungmin was never fond of each other, we were always fighting since we met each other and this year, he bullied me so much to the point where I lost the energy to even do anything back.

it’s not because I was offended or affected by the things he did or said, it was just because I realized that I would benefit nothing from fighting all day with him — about absolutely nothing.

I never understood why he hated me, he would often try to trip me where there were a lot of people around, hide my things for laughs, make rumours about me, and more.

I don't even care anymore, but him and his friends’ bullying doesn't seem to stop.

to be honest, when he didn't use to bully me as much, half of me enjoyed arguing with him. I was enjoying it because he didn't do physical things, but now he had just gotten worse, worse than I ever imagined.

I don't even remember the first time we started fighting and why. all I knew was that he hated me and that was not gonna die down soon.

speaking of the devil, “hey loser,” A familiar light brown haired boy stood in front on me with a couple of his friends trailing him behind.

“What do you want, seungmin?” I blurted out, my voice having an annoyed tone to it.

“we’re not even halfway through the school year and you're already stressed, it's only march.” he mocked me, making me look up to see that nasty smirk he had.

“I did not ask that... I asked you about what you wanted?” I raised my eyebrow at him, completely ignoring what he had said earlier.

“Nothing much really, How are you doing y/n?”

I knew for a fact that he wasn’t actually asking me if I was okay, I knew that he would try to pull some sick joke that would ‘offend me’

“Better than fine seungmin, how about you?” I played along his little games, I honestly am itching to know what he actually wants.

“Doing better than you, as always.” Whatever, I’m aware that he has an answer for everything, why did I even bother to respond to him.

“Well thank you for your time, you can go on with your day now.” I smiled warmly at him. it was fake but I couldn't think of a better idea of shooing him away.

He walked away, murmuring something to his friends and laughing about it which I certainly knew was about me.

I continued to listen to music and read my book at peace when seungmin left, I know I should've just ignored him but he wouldn't leave me alone unless he completely ruins my day, but to his dismay, I just don't care anymore.

Half of me wished that we were in a book; where in the end we’re either going to end up as friends or lovers. It might be weird, but I would do anything for him to stop bullying me,

even if it was being his lover.

I would basically be delusional if I said that was possible, so I shrugged off the thought.

After almost an hour of reading, I realized that I ran out of coffee. I was too focused on what I was reading that I forgot I had classes in only thirty minutes from now.

I took all of my things and went outside of campus to buy coffee from my favorite coffee shop.

Time passed by and I already had my order and was ready to leave when seungmin walked inside the café.

weird, I never knew he went here.

he and his friends laughed at me again for an unknown reason while I did my thing and completely ignored them.

there was one thing I did whenever I saw seungmin in public; it was to ignore him completely like I've never met him before.

I was afraid that he’ll embarrass me in front of people that wasn't from our university. Being humiliated in front of people from uni was already horrible and being humiliated from strangers didn't make a difference, just worse.

I tried my best to ignore him, but I don't think he was gonna let me go back inside campus without embarrassing me in front of everybody.

I was cautious around my surroundings, I knew any time now he would be sticking his foot out to trip me, so I was looking carefully everywhere.

I was able to leave the shop without getting terrorized by no other than seungmin. It was honestly a surprise and achievement to escape his terrorizing and I was here for it.

I finally calmed down and reached my campus, continuing to enter and go straight to first period.

I wasn't too late to class and not that much people were there, and gladly my favorite seat wasn’t taken by anyone yet.

I sat by the window and put my things down under my desk, I pulled out my textbook to review some topics as we had a pop quiz today.

I wasn’t stressing out as much because I was actually able to focus yesterday unlike the past few days before yesterday and I completely understood the topic.

I always enjoyed first period and the rest of my classes before lunch because well, me and seungmin didn't have the same schedule which is a relief.

But still, we had the same classes from fifth to ninth period which was hell for me, I’m so tired of crumbled paper and paper planes being constantly threw at me.

usually, those paper planes and crumpled paper will have something written in in; I always fail to not read them because of curiosity as there's something different written in it every single time.

I ignored my thoughts and continued studying until the teacher came.

Time passed by fast as the class finally ended with the school alarms lowly blaring. I breathed the sigh of relief as I stretched out my arms and back from staying still for too long.

right before I went out, I put my headphones in, not wanting to interact with anyone i see; especially that guy.

While walking to my next period, I passed by seungmin who was clueless of my presence — thankfully.

he looked troubled while he was looking for the things inside his backpack. Was it karma?

I ignored it and continued walking towards my class, and to my dismay, seungmin ran back and ‘accidentally’ pushed me.

I fell to the ground as he looked back at me, staring down, probably contemplating if he should help me or not.

To my surprise, he started picking up the books that fell from my hands and gave them back to me. He muttered a little ‘I’m sorry’ and ran back to where he was before, probably still looking for the missing object.

I stood still, I was speechless since this was the first ever time that he did something like this.

Earlier morning, he was just mocking me and probably talking bad about me with his friends and now he's helping me pick up my things?

Why should I even think too much about it, It was his fault anyway, he accidentally pushed me, he's REQUIRED to help me.

it just feels so impossible and unreal for him to do something like that...

I once again shrugged it off and continued walking to my next class, grabbing a new drink from the cafeteria before going because my coffee was already finished.

once I reached class, the seat by the window was already taken, there was only one seat left; it was at the very back.

I'm not complaining though, but I do lack focus whenever I'm back there.

I suddenly remembered when I just started highschool, I always sat at the back of the class…

with… seungmin?

Oh, now I remember.

We used to be chill around each other because we had a lot of similarities, then suddenly, everything turned into a competition of who likes what better.

then it became academic, I won a lot when it came to acads, but these days he’s either ranked one or two, never lower.

his friends was right below him, meaning I was below his friends.

I don't remember exactly what we fought about, but at least now I know some detail.

I also remembered having a small crush on seungmin?

whatever.

I probably only did because he was the only person I talked to and he was also the only person in the whole campus with the same level as me.

the teacher walked in snapping me out of my trance, she didn't wait any second and started discussing, leaving me no choice but to listen.

Throughout the whole class, I felt uncomfortable because not only was my pants feeling all itchy, but my head and my back hurts and I kept on unconsciously trying to recall me and seungmin’s past interactions.

I lost focus on the lesson but still kept trying to listen whenever I catch myself losing focus. I needed to get my rank back.

I was doing something wrong with my acads but I don't know what, if I don't get my rank back this semester I will surely get myself tutored.

But to be honest, getting tutored traumatized me. My parents used to hire really rude tutors before to get me studying ‘well’ and all.

But if I needed to get tutored to get my rank back, I WILL get tutored.

I didn't realize that the class already ended, students were already packing their stuff and leaving while I was just staring at the half blank white board that was now being wiped by the teacher.

I quickly gathered my things and left, I knew I was gonna pass by seungmin again but remembering what he did earlier, I didn't worry too much.

As expected, I passed by seungmin and to my surprise, he was walking with a sweet girl. he had his arms wrapped around her while they were laughing and talking.

oh how I felt bad for the girl. She's gonna get her heart broken like the others.

I said nothing as I noticed seungmin taking a quick glance at me and looking away. I pretended not to notice and kept walking.

So many unusual things already happened today and I don't want to encounter more, because what the hell is happening?

first of all, seungmin bullied me and suddenly became nice, I remembered all of our interactions and lost focus, and now he's walking with a random girl who's ‘bout to get her heart broken.

I've seen enough for today, I’m already so drained. I just want this day to end, it feels so long.

I only had two more classes left before lunch and that still wasn't enough to keep me content, I needed this to finish early.

I can't take more of this bullshit.

I let time fly and barely noticed that i was already walking to the cafeteria, I walked to the back of the line and waited for my turn.

When I got my beverages, I went straight to the rooftop.

I didn't like eating inside the cafeteria, There was a lot of people there and I couldn't bear the loudness.

when I was at the last step, the door from the rooftop swung open revealing a girl crying real hard and running.

the same girl seungmin was with earlier.

after her, the expected came out.

A disappointed, bored looking seungmin comes out. arms crossed and walking slowly.

I tried to ignore him and walked straight past him but of course, he became the person he was this morning.

“Y’know, you’re a real loser eating here all alone everyday.” he looked at me with a straight and serious face.

I unwrapped my burger and took a bite, pretending to not have heard him as I had my headphones on.

“i know you can hear me.”

“i know you can stop being an asshole if you wanted to.” I blurted out, I was already as annoyed by everything and I didn't want him interrupting me.

“that doesn't even- you know what, I don't care.” — “just why are you choosing to be such a loser when you can just socialize?” he boredly asks,

“and why can't you stop annoying me! why can't you stop bullying me and breaking other girls’ hearts?! why are you doing all of this when you can just become a better person?!” I yelled at him, causing him to stay silent.

“why can't you just work on yourself than to try to make me better?” I muttered.

“Because I can’t okay!” He yelled at me, I now noticed the tears that were forming in his eyes.

“Yes you can! you were a much better person when I first met you!” I yelled back, I won't let myself lose in this so-called argument.

“I miss you seungmin.” I finally admitted, looking at him with full of hope that he’ll understand.

“what?” he looks back up, trying to process what I just said.

“i said I missed you, seungmin.” I stood still, not sure of what to do or why I said that.

“How? what do you mean? I don't understand.” he looks at me teary eyed and confused.

“i meant I miss the old you, the person who was fun and chill, the person who used to listen to music with me in my classes, the person who ranted to me when he needed to and also the person that I could rant to.” at this point, I could feel the tears in my eyes start to form.

“I-... I’m really, really, really sorry y/n.” He breaks down completely and falls on the ground, covering his face with both of his hands.

I couldn't help but feel bad, he looked like a complete mess right now.

I couldn't move and didn't know what to do, but I knew I had to do something.

I went closer to him and cupped his face with both of my hands, “i forgive you seungmin, cry it all out.” after that, I hugged him and ruffle his hair while doing so.

I could feel the warmth of his breath hit my neck as he finally hugged me back and cried more onto my neck.

He was mumbling his apologies and reasons while i only sat there and kept on comforting the poor boy.

I soon enough invited him to eat with me, and he gracefully agreed.

After lunch, me and seungmin went straight to our classes.

After that, all I knew was my day went smoothly with seungmin who wasn't bullying me, and in fact was even chatting with me when we got the chance.

All of our classes are finally finished and we bid our goodbyes and separated ways.

After walking for a bit, I realized that I left my phone in our classroom.

I rushed to the classroom I was last in and went straight to my seat, thankfully, the phone was still there.

while I was walking my way back, I saw a beat up seungmin sitting on the floor and leaning on the wall.

I ran close to him, “shit, what happened?” I immediately sat down and took out the first aid kit that I always bring as I tend to be really clumsy and fall wherever I go.

“some... some group of guys stole my stuff.” he groaned while pressing onto his bruised eye.

“that looks pretty bad. let me-” I stopped talking as I focused to medicate the wounds on his face.

as I was finishing patching him up, he suddenly spoke, “why are you even helping me? you suffered so much because of me.” for a small momentum, I stayed quiet.

I realized that he was staring at me the whole time.

“the clinic is closed... when you get home, put an ice pack on this would you?” I said, pointing at his bruised eye and ignoring his question.

he gave me a reassuring nod and stood up as I did the same.

“I guess I have to go now...? bye seungmin, stay safe.” I smiled warmly at him and turned away when he grabbed my arm and turned me around.

“thank you y/n... thank you for forgiving me and helping me. I’m really thankful that you're here.” he held my hand tightly, looking at me straight in the eyes.

I stayed quiet while just looking at him. “Y/n, I... I love you.” — “This is serious, I'm not playing with you or anything, I really do love you.”

I kept quiet.

“I loved you from the start, when I first met you, but things went wrong at home and I took my anger out on people here because I thought it would be unfair if everyone was feeling fine and I wasn't. I regret everything I really do, and you made me realize that.” he sighs as he looks down, letting go of my hands.

We stayed quiet for a few seconds and I finally talked. “it’s okay, I told you right? you could change...” — “and seungmin...” I said and picked up the both of his hands, recreating his previous action.

“i love you too.” I stared at him with sincerity in my eyes.

Seungmin broke down again and hugged me tightly, I did the same thing back and patted his back. I stayed silent, there was no need to say anything.

We were quiet for a few minutes. Seungmin wasn't hugging me anymore, but his head was laying on my shoulder.

“Hey… let’s go home and talk about it, huh?” I cupped both of his cheeks as I stared at his flushed face.

His hair was messy, his eyes were puffy, his lips were plump and was pinkish while his nose and his ears were red.

I tilted my head waiting for a response as he just nodded his head.

We both stood up from the slippery floor and walked out of campus, finally.

“Y/n, do you want to… hang out for a bit?” he asked, staring at me with puppy eyes

I smiled warmly, “of course, minnie.” I said as I wiped the tears in his eyes, making him smile slightly with a hint of joy in him.

I was taken aback when he linked his arms with mine and kept on walking towards the closest café.

I stayed silent the whole time, I wish I stayed in this moment, forever.

We entered the café, arms still linked. “Do you want me to order for you?” — “Actually, that's not a question, I'll order for you. what do you want to get?” he asked, and finally unlinked our arms.

“Um, are you going to pay? I can pay for my-” before I could finish, he cut me off, “no. I will pay y/n, I owe you my life.”

“I get that I kind of changed you, but don't be drastically dramatic.” I laughed and looked at him,

“shush… just tell me what you’d like… it's an order.” he cutely shushes me like a little kid, “okay fine, I’d like to have a belgium chocolate latte, please.” I smiled at him and leaned on my hand for support.

“Of course, m’lady.” He smiled again and winked at me, I rolled my eyes at his flirty response and waited for him to come back.

A few minutes later, he came back with two drinks and a few donuts that I didn’t ask for. He probably got hungry from getting beaten up or something.

I was surprised when he gently pushed the plate of donuts towards me, “I got you some extra stuff, maybe you’d like it?” he smiles at me with shiny eyes,

“What… you know what, I'm not even gonna decline. but let's share, okay?” I jokingly say, “whatever you want, my puppy.”

damn, we aren't even dating yet.

I laughed at his sentence and decided to sip my drink and take a bite of the food, at the same time feeding him.

I noticed how his ears would get extremely red when I gave him a bite of the donut, “you’re whipped.” I seriously but jokingly said, “yes ma’am.” He closed his eyes and nodded as a response.

I laughed at his silly little response and kept on doing my thing.

Half an hour had already passed and we decided that we should go home as the sky was getting darker.

“Can I take you home?” He asks with the same puppy eyes he gave me earlier. as much as I wanted to scream and run and say yes, I stood strong.

“Seungmin, we've already spent a lot of time with each other, no need for more.” I said and placed my phone back inside my bag, he pouted at my response and crossed his arms, turning away from me.

I chuckled, “what are you doing?” He turned around my with his little pouty face and rolled his eyes, I didn't know he was so childish with people he was close with,

or only with me…?

“Please let me walk you home…” he mumbled loud enough for me to hear. “Seungmin, will you date me in the future?” I asked, waiting for a response.

Seungmin seemed to have choked on his words and turned to me, “of course?” he says in a questioning tone, like it was the most obvious thing.

“Then walk me home when we’re dating. Bye minnie! stay safe.” I said and walked the opposite way, I heard him groan and finally talk, “fine! stay safe too, Y/n.” — “thanks for today…” I wasn't too far to not hear as I smiled at his response.

I reached my house and the next thing I knew was I already took a shower and was ready to take a nap. I know this nap is gonna be peaceful remembering what happened today.

I was only supposed to take a nap but it turned into sleep, I woke up the next morning with horrible hair but a pretty face, odd.

I guess it was probably because I wasn't too stressed yesterday.

I got ready for school and time passed by like it was in a time lapse. I was able to focus well on my classes and even got a perfect score on two of my quizzes in two different subjects.

It was finally lunch break as I low-key searched for seungmin in the cafeteria, I just couldn't let him know that I was looking for him.

My heart rose as I saw Seungmin sitting at a table with a group of his friends, they were talking normally and laughing with each other.

I wanted to call his name so bad, I wanted to let him know that I was looking for him.

After a couple of moments of being interrupted by the noises of the cafeteria while eating, my mood suddenly changed.

Some girl was trying to hit on seungmin.

Why do I care? we're not together anyways.

that girl’s a whore.

why am I so affected anyway, he's still a player after all.

rip that girl’s ugly fucking face apart.

I ran to the rooftop, frustrated at the random thoughts that popped up inside of my head. I needed to clear my mind for a moment.

This is why I never eat at the damned cafeteria.

I tried to shrug the thought off and chewed my food ‘till there was almost nothing left, but then suddenly, the door swung open, revealing a smiling seungmin and the whore who now looked like she was ready to make out with him.

My heart dropped as I saw that they were about to kiss, in fucking front of me.

“get a room.” I say as I pretended to be disgusted by the two and walked out, I saw seungmin’s shocked face before I did and that was all it took for me to start crying.

It was too stressful for me and I couldn't take it anymore. I went home crying and running. Does he treat every girl like how he treats me?

I didn't mind changing my clothes as I was too focused on the fact that seungmin was doing shit with other girls and it gave me a huge horrendous amount of feeling betrayed.

I cried myself to sleep as I had nothing better to do, my only choice was to cry about it because no one knows about what happened to the both of us anyway.

only him.

I shouldn't have trusted him.

I guess trust issues are actually useful sometimes, I should've let it take over.

I woke up from the sound of rocks being thrown at my window, I looked at the time and I knew that by this time my parents would be asleep. who could be throwing rocks at my window at two in the morning?

People would hate me if I said I didn't hesitate to look at who was throwing at the window because one, it's stupid, and two, it could be a killer and my life could be in danger.

but I couldn't care any less, I just wanted to make the dude stop. I just want rest and I can't even get that as well.

I stared in shock when I saw who was in our backyard, it was none other than seungmin.

Society would say that I'm stupid or I'm making a fool of myself if it found out that I let him in, because I mean, he got me pretty fucked up in just a day.

As he entered, I backed away, I didn't want to be close to him even though I literally let him enter my room through my window.

“Y/n are you mad?” He looked at me worriedly, “Well I don’t know seungmin, am I mad?” I looked at him straight in the eyes with an emotionless face.

“You might have misunderstood, it really wasn't what it looked like-” I cut him off, I didn't want to hear more.

“Misunderstood that you were close to fucking that girl? don't worry, it’s okay seungmin. we're not dating.” I replied bluntly and crossed my arms, at this point, I wanted to cry but no tears would come out.

I chuckled, “You’re so good at acting, minnie.” I combed my hair with my hand as I crossed my arms back again after, “please… I didn't mean to…” He walked closer towards me with a ‘pitiful’ face others might say.

“No, no, it’s okay seungmin! totally fine! I mean why are you even apologizing? like we're not even dating bro.” I sarcastically responded to his lame apology.

“I’ll explain, She claimed to have liked me for years and I didn't know what to do so I acted through it! and she suddenly brought me to the rooftop and I don't know… I left her after I saw you.” he explained, making everything clear for me.

“so seungmin, are you implying that if we dated and some girl confessed to you, you’d fuck her?” I laughed and kept my arms crossed.

“No! no y/n please I really didn't want to! but my friends were making fun of me and calling me names and all…” he scratched his head, I've had enough of this bullshit.

“LAME! you're fucking lame! What kind of excuse is that?! leave my room right now. right now seungmin! fucking asshole.” I yelled and mumbled the last two words. I was so pissed off that I felt as if I wanted to jump off a cliff and die so that he could feel guilty.

The last thing I knew, he was hugging me and crying on my shoulder while repeatedly saying ‘I’m sorry, please don't leave me. I love you.

it broke my heart seeing him like this. my emotions took over me and forgave him, in the end, I was laying my head on his arm while staring at the ceiling.

the dim lamp made it comfortable enough for me to stay still, staying as quiet as ever.

“Y/n please understand if I want to keep our relationship a secret, if we start dating… y’know…” he suddenly speaks, not moving an inch.

“why?” I asked emotionlessly and bluntly, “because of my friends… My parents know you. my friends will snitch on me once they find out that I'm dating you.”

“why?” I repeated my question having no energy to form a proper conversation.

“Your parents, my parents, they know each other. my family talks a lot about how they're trying to beat each other on sales and will do anything to beat them, even if it means risking someone’s life.” he explained as I stayed silent, everything was starting to clear up.

“Seungmin, I'm sleepy.” I exclaimed and yawned, he played with my hair as I slowly melted at his touch and eventually dozed off and slept peacefully.

I woke up the next morning to see that seungmin was no longer by my side, there was only a pillow on where he had his arm and I was laying on it, he must've left while I was sleeping.

I got ready for school and the same thing happened just like any other day. I went to my classes, ate at the rooftop, went home and completely pretended that seungmin didn't exist at all.

it was already night time as I was getting ready to sleep, scrolling a bit on my phone before I heard someone throw rocks on my window again.

It's seungmin.

I let him in as he gave me a hug when he stepped inside, I hugged him back tiredly and laid down on my bed as he did the same as last night, putting his arms under my head as a pillow.

“I missed you, minnie.” I exclaimed. “I missed you too, my y/n. he replied back.

“How was your day?” he asked, “aren’t your friends wondering why you aren't bothering me at school?” I asked, completely ignoring his question.

“Oh, yeah, they did.” he scratched his head, “what did you say?” I asked,

“I said that there was no point of it anymore, and that I got lazy.” he responded. “m‘kay.” I replied effortlessly as all I wanted to do was sleep. Today was a tiring day from me and I can't even say or do anything properly.

“You seem really tired… y/n.” he says as he played with my hair like last night, “It was a stressful day.” I explained bluntly and closed my eyes.

“I have something important to ask you.” He suddenly says, making me shocked on the inside but having no energy to show it.

“What is it?” I asked nervously, “Can you be my girlfriend?” he turned to me and cupped my face with his right hand.

“huh… you're just tired. Let's get some rest.” I say and shrug it off, closing my eyes once again.

“No y/n, please give me the permission to be yours. to be your boyfriend.” he says, making me open my eyes, I now realized what he has said was serious.

“seungmin… of course.” I say in happiness. I couldn't explain how happy I was, despite the fact that I was all sleepy and tired, I still managed to have the energy to smile and hug him tightly.

He kept on playing with my hair while hugging me back too, “Goodnight, sleep well, love.” I was too tired to respond and dozed off.

As expected, I woke up the next morning with seungmin gone and a pillow under my head.

I got ready, did what I did on a daily basis and everything was going completely normal.

I went to class, ate at the rooftop, went home, and have seungmin throw rocks at my window.

I woke up the next day with seungmin gone like usual and the same cycle repeats over and over again.

Six months passed and the same thing happened every single day, except I was doing better in my studies and I was now ranked second.

I was walking normally when I saw seungmin talking to a girl who seemed to be flirting with him, he didn't seem to react the same way the girl was acting and stayed there, standing still while staring at her blankly.

I was relieved to see that he reacted like this, but suddenly, the girl started crying and pulled him into the… fucking janitor’s closet?

I stomped my way to the janitor’s closet, kicking the door open with all my strength.

“And what do you think you're doing?” I grabbed the girl by the collar, never in my life had I thought I'd do this, not even something similar to this.

I glared at the girl while she stared at me in shock.

“Talk, bitch!” I said as I slapped her, seungmin got a hold of my hand which made me stop, “why are you causing such a ruckus y/n?” I froze hearing him call me by my name which he hadn't done since we started dating.

He looked at me coldly, as if we didn't know each other at all.

“what…?” I looked at seungmin, feeling betrayed. He pulled me out of the closet leaving the girl alone and took me to the same rooftop I just came from.

“Are you out of your mind?! do you want my family to find out and break us apart y/n?!” he yelled at me, rubbing his forehead in frustration.

“You might now care but I do, I care. I don't want my parents to fucking find out! I'll fucking die!” He yelled again, kicking an empty can of soda from the floor.

“So you'll let her do shit to you? huh!?” — “I’ve had enough of your bullshit seungmin! This is the second fucking time you let someone try to fuck you!” I yelled back at him, I wasn't backing down now.

“Y/n do you really not understand?! Did you ever consider my damn feelings!?” He turned around.

that sentence broke me completely, I absolutely had nothing to say.

“We’re not getting anywhere. I can't do this anymore, I tried to work this secret relationship shit thing and it's just not working. Let's end this. I'm breaking up with you.” I stared at him in frustration and sadness.

his face dropped, “fuck… no wait, I mean, I'm sorry babe, I’m just really stressed today-” I cut him off, “don’t sugarcoat it now seungmin, I'm sick of this bullshit.” I didn't say anything anymore as I felt like I was gonna have a mental breakdown right there.

In fact, I really wanted to work out things with him but I just couldn't, if our parents hate each other so much then there was no way, we were only in senior highschool and didn't have a job to at least support our decisions with.

I knew it was better to end things with him. It was the right person, but it was the wrong time.

If only I had met him when we're in college, working or something I could work out stuff with him because I know he can handle things without depending on his parents, but I didn't, I had no choice.

seven months passed and I finally was in college. I moved out and got my own apartment that my parents provided me that I soon enough would completely own as I finally got myself a part time job at a nearby hotel.

Being a receptionist was more than enough to keep me alive which led me to renting a larger and fancier apartment.

I was loving my new life at my job, college, my house, everything.

I also met a couple of new people who were hyunjin and jeongin, I met them at a campus project that required working with other college students and we met from making background props for apparently a really big film showing only in a month.

It was a perfectly fine day when I was met with a familiar light-brown haired boy who was looking… more decent now.

I was asked to show him around campus and tell him about all the upcoming large projects we have.

Wow, great timing and great person.

There was an awkward silence between us as I scanned him, he was wearing a simple blue cardigan jacket and some baggy white pants with some good ‘ol Jordans.

“Hi… Y/n. Long time no see.” He broke the silence by speaking in a happy tone that had a hint of nervousness in it.

“Hey, seungmin… I didn't expect to be seeing you today.” it was probably because the school saw on his information that he went to the same school as me in highschool and thought that we’d know each other.

Well great, because we do.

“Um… so…” he spoke and looked down, looking for words to say, “do you wanna see the campus or talk about the projects we have soon?” I talked confidently, I was NOT gonna show him that I was nervous.

To be honest, I missed him a lot but moved on from the past and now think of our past relationship as a sweet little memory of my highschool days.

“Um- we can talk about the projects! if that’s okay…” he said as I noticed his ears get red, like it used to. he's even more shy now.

stop it y/n.

“Yeah, totally. Where do you wanna talk? here or somewhere outside campus?” I asked nicely, waiting for a response.

“Uh, can we talk in a café or something?” He chuckled lightly, oh shit, the memories.

“Oh, yeah, of course.” I said as I put my phone back inside my sling bag and waited for him to lead the way.

He brought me to the closest café and we started talking about the upcoming projects and what he needed to help with. We finished talking after only half an hour and I was finally getting ready to leave.

“Hey y/n, you seem to know everything about campus. Why is that?” He asked me genuinely, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m the university’s vice president.” I chuckled without looking at him, just gathering all of my things and shoving them in my bag.

“Actually, I've been saving up the courage to ask you this since earlier but can we talk about… you know?”

I knew it, I knew this was gonna happen.

I sat back down and sighed, “fine, make it quick. please.” I pleaded, to be honest I actually never wanted this conversation to end but of course I wasn't gonna say that to my literal ex.

“I… you know what, I'm not gonna talk about the past… I'm just gonna tell you how my days have been, is that okay?” Was he just trying to spend his time with me longer?

“Yeah, go on…” I said, “so… kinda unusual but I'm a caregiver, and I've got my own apartment too, my parents aren't controlling me anymore, thankfully. And yeah, I guess life’s pretty decent… but empty without…” he said, not finishing his words

“What about you, y/n?” He suddenly asked, “well, life’s alright. I'm doing well with my studies and I have an apartment too. I'm also a part time receptionist at a hotel,” I exclaimed.

he smiled, “You’re a receptionist? you must be rich now.” He laughed, “Not to be egoistic or over-confident or something but, it's kinda like that.” I joked around.

“But… gosh. I can't take it anymore, can we… hang out? sometimes?

I stayed silent, I didn't know what to respond. my choice would either fix all of my life problems or make more problems, but I'm saying yes.

“...okay.” I responded bluntly and stood up, “see you… tomorrow. I’ll show you around campus.” I left without hesitation.

I felt suffocated inside there, my heart was pumping really hard after I realized what I just did, I really agreed to repeat history with that guy, with seungmin.

I went home as we didn't really have school today, we just met up because the teacher just wouldn't let me skip a day and the student council wouldn't let me skip an after school meeting either.

It was already dark and I had to go to work today so I rushed home and changed into my work attire and went straight to work.

Weeks and weeks have past and me and seungmin actually started to hang out, things were working out better than before. We were able to go around places without being scared of being seen talking to each other in a friendly way.

Then suddenly, he invited me over to a café… a café I will never forget.

It was the café that we went to a lot when we were in highschool.

I felt nervous and suffocated but I still went. My heart beating rapidly was also not helping, I saw him sitting there, wearing a sweater and baggy jeans near the glass wall, the same seat we were sitting in when we first made up with each other.

I sat in front of him, waiting for him to say something.

“Y/n… hi.” he greeted me, looking as nervous as ever. I tried to act normal and keep my cool while I was speaking though, someone here had to act all cool.

“Here’s your drink, I ordered earlier.” he says smiling while slightly pushing the drink towards me. I stared at the drink, A belgium chocolate latte.

“Thanks… so why did you call me?” I asked, “So I’ve been thinking…”

“I… I missed you, romantically. Please give me a second chance, y/n.” he held both of my hands, “Um… well, seungmin…” I was speechless.

“I’m really happy that we’re talking again, I've been so sad since we fell apart. I know we can work it out, I really miss you.” he begged.

“oh…” I sighed, “okay.” I looked down, wanting to just explode because I really gave in.

“thank you, thank you so much y/n you don't know how much you mean to me.” I saw him smile passionately while holding my hands tightly.

“Do you want to come over to my apartment and talk privately about it?” he asked, “Sure, seungmin.” I smiled warmly at him.

Once we were inside his apartment, I was surprised to see how clean it was.

We were now sitting at the couch with our unfinished drinks, “Y/n… will you be my girlfriend… I'll do better, I promise.”

it's not a sin to give him a chance, right?

“Of course.” I smiled warmly at him.

“Yes! Thank you! I love you!” he yelled with excitement and started to peck every part of my face.

After all the pecking he did, he hugged me tightly. “I never thought I was gonna be able to get you back, I love you.” he said while shoving his head on my shoulder.

I ruffled his hair and the next thing I knew, we were already walking at the park.

Months have passed, we were doing amazing, we announced our relationship with everyone and my parents weren't too mad, but his parents definitely were, yet we weren't gonna let them stop up and keep us apart, we didn't do all of this for nothing.

“baby… I love you so much.” seungmin suddenly spoke in his morning voice, facing me and hugging me.

I chuckled at how cute he was when he woke up fresh from sleep, “I love you too, minnie.” I exclaimed, making him laugh, still looking high.

“minnie… do you listen to Taylor swift?” I asked him, turning to him and ruffling his hair, “Yes, of course since you love her so much.” He said,

“Well, I can relate to her, you know.” I smiled, “how?” seungmin asked, “because…”

“all of the girls you loved before made you the one i’ve fallen for. every dead end street led you straight to me, now you're all I need, I'm so thankful for all of the girls you loved before.”

a/n: hi everyone, so yes, as you can tell, this is based on a taylor swift song (all of the girls you loved before) I finished this in only two days so please bear with me if it's bad, but other than that, if you reached it here, congrats. I already consider you as my fan. Thank you for reading and have a great day!

p.s if you want to see my other socials, you can find it at ⤵

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nerves-nebula · 8 months ago

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Re read Loose Stitches and it got me thinking about school experiences that made me realize something really weird my parents always said that stemmed into something that actively still a problem now that I’m in university, where I really struggle to admit when I’m struggling or don’t know something, even though that’s the point of school. My parents always used to say I shouldn’t ever say “I don’t know” and got mad at me for asking questions about stuff they asked me to do, and got reaaal snippy whenever I asked for clarification or for them to repeat what the told me to do. Stuff like that made me weird about getting help from teachers in any scenario, which I’m realizing is a whole avoidant behavior thing that fucks me up even when I do ask for help. Any way, I don’t know why I’m telling u any of this—I feel like my asks to u always get traumadump-y—but Loose Stitches captures a series of very vivid experiences which makes me think which is cool and I love it a lot, I guess.

sammeeee. well, sort of. they'd both get annoyed if i questioned them and my own self imposed anxiety + their bullying made me terrified to ask questions and look "stupid" but at least my dad is enamored enough by the concept of learning that he doesn't hate ALL questions. if you ask the right ones he'll even be delighted :D at least, that's what I remember. it's been a long time now.

I'm in my junior year of college and I've basically only just now realized that I should probably have emailed professors a lot more than I did. for help, advice, questions. i mean they're the greatest assets we have here, they have SO MUCH knowledge and I've just been too afraid of bothering them to ask.

y'know, loose stitches was never supposed to be about school or the education system or CPS or anything like that. in fact, while writing part 1 I was initially annoyed because I wanted to get to all the "cool" stuff that happens in part 2 and I needed to spend all this time in this setting i didn't care about (this weird hybrid CPS housing/college campus) in order to do it. but in having to flesh out that "boring" stuff in part 1, i've found that's not so boring or uninteresting after all, and it's gonna make part 2 way better as well when i dive into all the ways the system can and has failed people, not JUST our main two characters.

honestly, I still think the world of loose stitches is kind of underdeveloped, because the focus was never really on the world building for me so a lot of it is just life experiences and what I've learned from history with a slightly different nonhuman context.

ummmm that has nothing to do with what you've said here and i just realized im rambling. should get back to work now, thanks for the ask! I always love to hear what people think about my comic <3

#nnstuff #rambling #ask #asks are sweethearts #loose stitches related

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swearphil · 1 year ago

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hi renee, do you still read schitts creek fanfic? do you have any recs? :)

anon, I love the timing of getting this ask on monday and then ao3 was down and I thought it would be awhile until I could effectively answer this ask but ao3 is back! yay!!! and then it took me three days to answer this because I couldn't make decisions!

yes, I still read schitt's creek fanfic! when I started compiling a list for this ask, I was going to do 10 fics but I've decided to rec 20: 10 multi-chapter fics and 10 one shots/single chapter fics. this way I get to include more fics and hopefully you find something you'd like to read! I also recommend checking out my sc fic recs tag and I also have this my recs tag where I made recs for the @farm-witches-fic-recs this or that challenge! I also recommend the witches' posts for more recs!

here are 20 fics from 20 authors but please know there are so many incredible authors in this fandom and I love them all and I hate that I can't include all of them!!!

Multi-Chapter Fics

On the Outside Looking Through by @smblmn

A pride & prejudice AU

Red White and Blue Jays by @grapehyasynth

Red White and Royal Blue AU. David Rose, First Son of the United States, hates Patrick Brewer, First Son of Canada. That gets him into some trouble - and then a lot of trouble. (I mean we're about to get the movie sooooooooo)

my heart was broke, my head was sore by @blueink3

The morning after Grad Night goes somewhat differently when Patrick gets a call from home.

Crossing Out the Good Years by @nontoxic-writes

One thing, David didn’t do one thing, and moved them to New York and let their marriage fall apart. But that wasn't supposed to happen. So Fate intervenes. aka the divorce-ish fic

The Rosebud Diamond by @vivianblakesunrisebay

Patrick is a detective. David is his mysterious client. There’s a priceless diamond, a masquerade ball, murder, thievery, blackmail, secrets, betrayal, gangsters, smoking, whiskey, and angst galore. (And a happy ending.) It’s a film noir AU.

you never shined so brightly by @rosedavid

A La La Land AU in which Patrick is the aspiring actor and David is the struggling musician.

Home at Last by @januarium

When Stevie Budd took on the role of Sally Bowles she could never have known how much she would gain from it. From the prompt: An alternate universe where Ted does not choose Alexis at the end of Season Four and Stevie and Alexis get close during Cabaret rehearsals

You Happened by @lilythesilly

David Rose is many things: talented, creative, fashion-forward, well read—the list can go on, but at the very top of that list is Extremely Rich. So he doesn’t understand why his father is making him work at Rose Video—or why Patrick Brewer, a boy he's had virtually no interaction with since they were twelve, is suddenly always around. An enemies-to-coworkers-to-friends-to-lovers high school au.

Pull The Shot. Steam The Milk. Repeat. by @treluna4

Right at the beginning of David’s junior year of college, his dad’s business partner literally took the money and ran, and the Roses were left with nothing...He moved in with his friend Stevie and got a job at the Schitt Family Coffee Roasters south campus location. David was less than thrilled by this job prospect, but no one else was hiring and rent was a thing now, so he gathered what little self-respect he had left and prepared to meet his new manager, Patrick. But as it turned out, David had met him once before. Under very, very different circumstances. Or; the hookup-to-friends-to-lovers college coffee shop AU that no one asked for.

How Easy It Could Be by @maxbegone

A story about sweet caffeine, starting new, and falling in love slowly.

Single Chapter Fics

life ain't passing you by by @dinnfameron

Stevie has breakfast at the cottage before a business trip. David and Patrick have some thoughts regarding her feelings for her new coworker.

like glass from sandy ground by @middyblue

Five times Alexis ran from grief, and one time she didn't.

Pretty Follies by @treepyful

Alexis and Twyla team up to play matchmaker for Stevie and Ruth. Unfortunately, the course of true love never did run smooth.

I INDEX/MATCH You by @sarahlevys

Ruth maintains a lot of spreadsheets. Some of them feature Stevie.

are there still beautiful things? by @mymariahcarey

“Look what I got Stevie!” Twyla calls as she runs through the waist-high grass towards the line of trees where Stevie’s waiting for her. By the time Twyla reaches her, her cheeks pink and her breath labored, her french braids are coming undone and there’s a twig stuck in one of them. Or, Stevie and Twyla were childhood best friends.

falling into place like dominos by @petalwritesx

David and Patrick hold a second housewarming party, this time at their newly-renovated cottage. For old times' sake, they decide to play spin the bottle. Meanwhile, Stevie has been wrestling with her feelings for Alexis since she left for New York... and it never occurred to her that those feelings could flow both ways.

you light me up like starlight by @stereopticons

Patrick and his indie band head back to their hometown to perform for the annual holiday charity concert, and David tags along, even though they are still keeping their relationship a secret.

Live By Love Though The Stars Walk Backwards by @chelle-68

Stevie returns from a work trip to discover an exhausted Patrick who has trouble sleeping without David, who has been in LA visiting his family. Stevie's offer to spend the night to keep Patrick company, hoping it will help him sleep, turns into a night of heartfelt conversation about love, friendship, fate, and taking chances.

One Single Thread of Gold by @swiftlythebest

Patrick has a baseball viewing party, and David has a lot of feelings.

as we dream by the fire by @blackandwhiteandrose

The fire is just the right amount of warm -- enough to keep David toasty but not sweaty -- so he can enjoy lying against his husband’s chest, happy and content in his embrace. Patrick brings a hand up, slipping his fingers through David’s hair. “This is a great way to spend an evening,” he says, his voice soft. “We should do this more often.”

#asks #anon #my recs #i hope this helps anon!#please let me know if any links are incorrect #and if I forgot or tagged anyone incorrectly!

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geekgirlsmanifesto · 1 year ago

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It's going to take me a minute to get to my point so bear with me.

When I was a junior in high school I hated my English teacher because he was a gross hypocrite but he taught me something that followed me through a literature degree and years of being a fan of things.

We started learning about interpreting poetry and he gave us the poem "We Real Cool" by Gwendolyn Brooks and asked us to write a paragraph about what the poem meant and one of my classmates came up with a way to make the poem about fish. And my teacher said, though more than likely incorrect, my classmate made a point about the nature of interpretation.

It is wholly subjective.

Because to some people the poem is about fish.

And I'm really seeing this in the ways people are interpreting Only Friends. Each person is right based on their own viewpoint even if their viewpoint is in complete opposition to the view of the person making the post under them.

Like, I'm really enjoying the different interpretations of Mew's actions in episode seven. And, when I first watched the episode, I thought that he was rebounding with Ray because, at least around Ray, he felt loved.

And then my evil twin took over.

Now, I have created this Mew Revenge Plan, where Mew is taking those who he felt betrayed him that night and using their greatest fear against them.

He burned Top's picture in front of him. Setting fire again to the castle in the air he feels Top built with him.

He threatened to reveal just who Boston has been fooling around with to his father (because you know that man wouldn't care if Boston was sleeping with half the female population of Bangkok).

And Ray. Ray the messenger. The man who took away his illusions. He isn't using Ray for a rebound. He is destroying the one thing that Mew believes that Ray holds dear when nothing else seems to matter to him - Ray's infatuation with him.

Do I think that Mew is evil? Nah.

But I also think that right now the only thing he is thinking about is destroying those who destroyed his delusions.

This probably makes no sense at all but I'm going to post it anyway.

#only friends the series #only friends #khaotung thanawat #book kasidet #neo trai #force jiratchapong #i just can't get this thought out of my head #like i know that this sounds as wacky as fish poems but there you go

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ladytanithia · 9 months ago

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AO3 Twenty Questions

I was tagged by @dirty-bosmer Tagging @lillxart @gwilin-stay-winnin @skyrim-forever and @thequeenofthewinter (even though I know she's already done this!)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

416,292

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, only Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, although I have written a few Breath of the Wild fics (one one-shot, one short 8-chapter story, and two long fics that are unfinished). Once upon a time in junior high and high school, my friends and I wrote each other stories about Duran Duran and Def Leppard, but those are on paper and too old for anyone to care these days!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

You know, I hadn’t really looked in a long time, so I’m surprised/not surprised to find that mostly my LoZ fics are the highest in kudos (they’ve been there longest).

Dalliances with Dunmer (86)

Link the Anachronism (55)

Larissa’s Tale: Before the Hero (46) – this pleases me; my first story with an OC and a lot of research

Khajiit: Stranger in a Strange Land (45)

Starting Over: A New Woman in a New Hyrule (38)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Absolutely! While I write for myself and have to remind myself of this daily, it’s always nice to know that someone else has seen and enjoyed my labors of love. Readers who comment are rare and precious. And at least 2 of them have become actual friends!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Dalliances with Dunmer – but that wasn’t the end of the story, just the ending of the 2nd book in the story.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

What Might Have Been – because it was MEANT to be an alternate ending to the angsty one.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not usually. When I first started putting DwD on AO3 and fanfiction, one person called it dogshit and another person went on a mean, scandalized rant about Miranja’s “fatherless behavior.” But a dear friend told me, if there’s no controversy, you’re not doing it right, and I left the flame in the comments for that purpose!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Smut/romance/erotica – various levels depending on the mood and the characters’ relationship. There’s been everything from cuddly fluff to heart-pounding romance to jizz-in-your-pants or call-the-priest filth.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I can’t answer that definitively. I started a crossover (Khajiit) between BotW and Skyrim (a friend used Skyrim to wean me off of BotW, and now I live here forever), but I haven’t even gotten to the crossover part and now it’s been 2 years since I played BotW, so we’ll see where that goes.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of. I can’t imagine why anyone would, unless they were training an AI!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yes, just a silly little back-and-forth scenario with my OC and a friend’s OC. It’s not on AO3, but I’m hoping it will be soon!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Of my own, or anyone’s anywhere? Mine, of course, would be Miranja and Talvas. Elsewhere… I like to ship Kvothe and Devi in The Name of the Wind – if for nothing else but the hate sex!

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I want to finish all of them except the Link and Zelda stories, since those are moot points by now.

16. What are your writing strengths?

From others’ reviews, I’d say characterization and description. I like to get inside the characters’ minds and hearts, think up back stories for them that might have made them the way they are, make their interactions with other characters as genuine as I can. When describing a scene, I almost focus more on the sensations than the actual physical presence of, or situation of, things. What is the character seeing, hearing, smelling, touching, or tasting, and how does it make them feel? The feelings are what you remember, not the details. (Unless you’re Sherlock Holmes.)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Second-guessing myself. If someone says the story’s moving too slowly, I pick up the pace and skip the less important stuff that was kind of important to me. Then someone says I’m rushing the story, so I rewrite it and flesh it out the way I wanted it to begin with. Like, I BELIEVE I’m pretty good at re-reading and assessing the pace, but then I let someone else tell me I’m doing it wrong. Also, allowing things to distract me and keep me from writing until I don’t even remember where I was at.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

If it’s relevant to the plot, then of course! Otherwise, if it’s just idle chatter, that feels like extraneous flaunting on the author’s part. Look what I can do! Haha!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

As many things as I’ve been a fan of, I’ve never thought of writing my own fiction about them until I beat Breath of the Wild. Because I wanted so badly to know how they would turn the kingdom back around, I decided to write my own continuation.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Larissa’s Tale or Hrefna’s Crush. Shorter stories, but special to me in different ways. Larissa was kind of a self-insert character but better-looking, who got her hands and other body parts on Link before Zelda did. Hrefna’s Crush was sort of a birds-and-bees and starting to have crushes story, where Sondas Drenim is the object of her crush, and Miranja is the competition she loves but envies.

#tag game #20 questions #ao3 fanfic writers edition

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roxnpens · 2 years ago

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Firefly

Chapter Two: Smokes to Ashes

TW: [child abuse] [gore] [description of psychological abuse]

If those are triggers for you please be careful or wait for the next chapter. Thank you bunnies 😘

Thanks to @deny-the-issue and @juniper-sunny for beta-reading. 🥰

__________

Chapter summary:

We take a deep dive into your past. A past full of darkness… and pain.

Taglist: @juniper-sunny @deny-the-issue @fantadym @mmartos @astudyincontrasts @averagecrastinator @ace-of-zaun @artwithvivien @zaunitekiwi @x-amount-verbs @chaoticlicense @silcosentropy @silcoitus

All the good girls go to Hell

'Cause even God herself has enemies

And once the water starts to rise

And Heaven's out of sight

She′ll want the Devil on her team

My Lucifer is lonely

There′s nothing left to save now

My god is gonna owe me

There's nothing left to save now

Your encounter with Vander left a serious impression on you. Just from his looks, you would have never thought that he would be a gentle giant. But he seems to be a good guy and you kinda liked that you pulled the gig on the enforcers together without even the need to exchange words.

While you were walking the streets heading to the Last Drop you were caught by the impressions around you. The rain stopped pouring like floods from the sky and was now more like light summer drizzles. The mud under your boots began to recover from the flood treatment it received and slowly began to dry. You walked by many little alleys with old and crumbling buildings… if you were honest with yourself the name “shacks” would describe it better since it's just building ruins that received an “Undercity treatment” of metal plates, nails and a LOT of good hope. The noise of children playing before the shacks pulled you out of your observations and captured your every ounce of attention. The tiny humans played catch and their laughter echoed from the metal surrounding them and you enjoyed the sound it made.

The next thing you encountered were other children who didn’t play but instead stood around a metal bin from which a fire rose steadily into the air. A certain smell got up your nose - rising further and further up your nose like vines crawling up a house wall to reach the shining sun. When the smell reached your brain it triggered a mechanism that reopened a long-forgotten memory - pushed so far down the well of remembrance that you could physically feel the monster sinking its claws into your flesh again.

The smell that caught up in your nose was the scent of burning oak, mixed with burning metal. You kept walking down the gloomy streets, but your demon caught up with you and they brought you back to your childhood, where the monsters had human faces…

You were what - 6, 7 years old? When the Enforcers brought you to Piltover. Away from your family and into a world you could have never even imagined. For the first time in forever, you had your own room, and your own bed… but no family.

Right from the beginning you were put aside, like the cast out that you are - or as the other Piltover kids said with their noses high up in the sky: “The amphibian from the Undercity”. It hurt a lot every time they said that but your dad could land harder punches than that, and while those roaches thought about new ways to hurt you, you learned and learned and learned everything you could get your hands on. In the end, you were the one with the best grades and the best results overall in school.

But after school… oh… you hated the time after school. Every day you had to train your arcane magic in the well-known academy of Piltover… which didn’t work at first. In the first months, you couldn’t even ignite a spark in your hand, while in the Undercity you could throw fireballs the size of your head and as hot as the sun. Your overseer was a grim and cold-hearted Junior Sheriff Enforcer and his name was Jackal Sparks. A name that will burn itself into your memory, never to be lost in the fog of oblivion that clouds many minds with increasing age. Junior Sheriff Sparks was a tall and expansively broadly built man, who was brimming with strength that you couldn’t help but imagine that he would break your neck like he breaks matchwoods in half. He has black well styled hair in which he took a lot of pride - measured by the frequency he touched it. All of his subordinates feared him and his rage tantrums - which he mostly unleashed upon you. True to his name, he mostly used electrical run weapons on you like his beloved Long-Rod-Taser he named “Tickler” … for obvious reasons. During one of your lessons on using your magic, there was this little, hairy, doglike creature standing at one of the windows of the academy. He was watching as you tried your best to perform something that was praised to be outstanding and world-changing. Yet - you couldn’t help but notice a steady sad glance in his eyes - like he was pitying you for what you have to endure. Many months later after your first exchange of sights, he found you crying and shaking, leaning on a wall in the academy. You recovered from one of Sparks’ treatments to bring out your magic, where he burned your back so horribly that it was covered with large burn bubbles, hot and wet as a sauna. You remember crystal clear how he reached for your hand, petting it without words as you cried your eyes out. He said not a single word so that your wailing was the only sound that echoed through the corridors.

After some time - you couldn’t say how long it took for you to finally adjust a bit to the pain, he spoke to you with the most calming voice you heard so far.

“Now dearest, is it a bit better?” Fascinated by the voice and still hoarse from your everlasting cry episode you could only nod in consent. The little creature put on the sweetest smile which gave you a feeling of security like nothing had in a long time.

“Good, very good. My name is Professor Heimerdinger and what’s yours, little butterfly?” he asked, his voice still soothing your physical wounds. With a trembling voice, you tell him your name and strangely enough, it feels good to do so. Professor Heimerdinger seems to be one of the nicer people on this planet, so you ask him the one thing that you wanted to ask him since you first saw him watch your “training”.

“Professor Heimerdinger… Why did you watch my training back then? You always seem so sad while watching…”

Heimerdinger clears his throat and gives you what you would classify as an unsure look. “I…”, he clears his throat again, “… was accidentally walking by one of the windows that led to one of the training halls. When I saw what they did to you… I couldn't avert my eyes from it. The sight was simply horrific - to see a young beautiful girl getting tortured to the very brim of her existence…and knowing I can’t intercept this malice.”, he explains.

You couldn’t understand much of what he said because he used strange words you had never heard before, but it sounded like he was not fine with the way you were being trained. So you asked, “Professor - it is training like it should be isn’t it? So you don’t need to be sad about normal things.”

Heimerdinger sighed, “No dear… what you have to endure… nobody else has to and it shouldn’t be `normal` for it is not.”

He suddenly takes a look behind him where heavy footsteps could be heard. “Now dear, you need to see a doctor or your injuries will get worse,” he informs you and you stand up slowly. He takes your hand again and you both quickly leave the corridor into another one to avoid the approaching footsteps which could only be Enforcer boots. Heimerdinger takes you down endless corridors inside the academy, past boards for students who study mechanics, history, mathematics, even art, and past laboratories for chemical experiments until you reach a huge iron door. Your newly acquired skill of reading tells you that here is the academy's sick wing. Heimerdinger reached for the handle of the door but unfortunately was too short for it. You reacted immediately and pushed the handle down yourself.

Again with a smile on his face, he said, “Thank you dear - unfortunately Mother Nature didn’t expect that people from my species will have definite problems in a ‘bigger world’.” You smiled for the first time in a long while and it felt good - like a little spark that warmed your chest. Together you walked through the iron door and closed it behind you.

You stood in one of the largest rooms you've ever been in. The ceiling of the room was so high, that you had problems seeing the exact pictures and statues at it. You kept walking - your mouth wide open from astonishment, watching everything that your eyes could lay sight on. Unfortunately, your astonishment couldn’t last very long, because a new wave of pain leaped through your body - making you bend your back backward in an attempt to release the pain. Heimerdinger flinched a little in your direction and waved to an elderly woman, judging from her clothing, a nurse, to come over to him. You stopped a few feet from them still caught in the wave of pain, but a small clear of his throat broke the focus of the pain on you and your head turned to him.

He called you to his side and introduced you to the nurse. “Little butterfly, this is Madame Wonders - as her name suggests: she can heal your every wound like magic. Not real magic like yours, but something equally impressive. Now why don’t you go with her and let her patch you up?”, he suggested and his hands directed you to Madame Wonders.

A little unsure if you can trust her, you put one foot after another. Madame Wonders extended her hands to you and spoke with her warm elderly voice, “Come, dear, let's get you fixed up so that you can play with the other kids and go to school again.”

“I don’t want to play with the others - they’re mean and I don’t want to practice the stupid magic anymore. That’s what got me here and I don’t want it anymore - I don’t want to get hurt anymore…”, everything that you’ve been carrying in your little heart just started floating out your mouth and you couldn't stop yourself. You wanted somebody to hear what you have had to bear throughout the last months. Madame Wonders and Heimerdinger listened patiently to every word you said and only the Madame’s hands on your shoulders stopped you from crying again.

A brief exchange of glances between them and Heimerdinger said just one tiny sentence that put your mind to rest, “Never again - I … will … find a way so that you don’t get hurt anymore.”

After Madame Wonders put you on a padded treatment table with your back to her, she started to treat the burns on your back. She cut your shirt open and removed it as carefully as she could, then she examined the burns which had already started to blister. Every time she started to do something, she explained it and you could always ask further questions. This way you learned how to classify burns and how to treat them. Plus your pain wasn’t that present during the procedure, because Madame Wonders always kept your brain on the subject. At the end of the treatment, your back was covered in a cooling ointment and bandaged completely.

“Now dear…”, she said, sitting right next to you, taking one of your hands. “… your burns are bad, which is why we need to change your bandages every day or the burns will stay for a long time. So for the next time, you will just go to school and do no training.”

Your eyes began to shine and the fire inside you started to flare out again.

You felt it again - the “Amber of the Undercity” as your mother called it. The power within you creates the heat on your skin until a thought ignites it into a raging flame. You could feel how the fire magic once again made its way through every fiber of your body - breathing new life into every cell of your body. ‘What a bit of safety can do‘ you thought to yourself and concentrated your magic to the palm of your right hand. At first, just heat rose from your open palm, so you concentrated more and a little amber ignited. It was tiny, very tiny and that was not enough for you, so brought your thumb and index finger together and snapped them. A full-grown flame ignited high and hot from your palm - illuminating the room with a new source. Heimerdinger and Madame Wonders watched you invoke magic - full fascination and on Heimerdinger’s site with a little bit of fear.

Your eyes began to shine and you looked at Heimerdinger full of joy like a kid on Christmas Day “I … I can do it again. Professor - I can do it again. I can summon the fire again,“ you said with tears of relief in your eyes.

At this moment, a loud clapping startled you out of your euphoria. Sparks stood at the door, clapping his hands with a wide smile on his face. Instantly the flame in your hand went out and fear painted your face in every shade of horror.

“Well done little one, well done. Finally, we can train you properly and for what you were brought here,” he said while walking towards you.

In an attempt to get away from him, you jumped behind the treatment table and crouched. You know it was not effective, but you just needed to buy some time to find a physical weapon, since your fear cut off your magic. On one of the tablets you could spot a scalpel, so you dashed toward it, grabbed it, and held it against your tormentor. A look of amusement graced his face and he walked towards you while holding his arms outstretched beside him.

“Now, now, little rat - don’t get feisty with me. Be a good little rat and come to the cat.“

“That is enough, Junior Sheriff Sparks,” said Heimerdinger with a serious voice and walked in your direction.

“Careful now, yodel. You were allowed to watch the training session because the sheriff had a liking for the little rat. If you get in my way, I will teach you a lesson and if somebody asks how you got yourself the treatment - I will simply give them a lie,”, the smile on his face widened as he looked at Heimerdinger from the corner of his eyes.

What a bad man. What a truly devilish creature. Like a nightmare that climbed off an old Undercity fairytale. The kind of fairytale, which was used to teach you to fear the Enforcers and all of Piltover - like the thing your mom told you - about the boy and the dream.

The boy that stood on the bridge to Piltover looking at the waves of the river imagining a better life, when an Enforcer walked up to him. The Enforcer asked the boy why he stared at the waves and the boy answered that he wanted to go to school and become an industrialist. The boy said he wanted to make the life of everybody better and proof that the Undercity also has things to offer people would want. The enforcer said 'You wish’ and pushed the boy over the railing of the bridge into roaring waves. You never got to know what became of the boy, but you don’t want to end up like him. Ever.

Sparks chuckle ripped you out of your memory and you focused on him. In a desperate act of fear, you ducked away under his arms and stabbed him in the stomach with the scalpel. He howled in pain as his face contorted in anger. He grabbed the handle of Tickler when the iron door burst open and a new wave of enforcers entered the room including a young woman who looked very important with the way everybody made way for her.

“Sparks - what are you doing? Where is the girl?“ she asked in a harsh tone.

“Sh-, Sheriff Grayson, ma‘am,“ Sparks stuttered - holding his midsection where the scalpel was still in place. The fear of Sparks was still turning your face into a grimace, but the young sheriff walked to you slowly and reached out a hand in your direction.

“It’s alright, little one. Nobody will harm-“

“Liar!!“, you screamed in her face and Sheriff Grayson involuntarily shrieked back.

Salty streams ran down your cheeks as you stood in shock in the sick bay. Sheriff Grayson came closer, but it was too close for your hurt soul. You fell on your knees cowering on the ground and hoping, praying to Janna that they would finally leave you alone.

As if “the Amber” could finally detect the danger surrounding you - it activated itself and surrounded you in a wall of flames. They covered your body completely, without burning you. The flames tore off the bandages within the first moments of the flare and revealed to everybody the damage you had taken. Yet only Sheriff Grayson grimaced in shame and sympathy, while from the other enforcers, only whispers could be heard. Things like: “What an abomination of nature.”, “We should kill her before she can kill us.” Or “Sparks was right - the rat has no worth beyond her fire shit.” The flames licked over every single wound, every single bruise, and as if by magic they disappeared, leaving little scars on only the worst. Sheriff Grayson could only watch - her eyes a mixture of fear and fascination. When you were exhausted beyond your physical limits - your vision blackened and you sagged sideways. Whatever happened now was beyond your control.

“My my. Poor child,” said Sheriff Grayson with her eyes on you. You looked like a miserable bundle of meat. Now rage sparked in her chest and she turned ferociously towards Sparks and gripped the handle of the scalpel. Face to face she asked him, “What have you done with the girl that she is so afraid - huh?”. She shakes the scalpel a little in the wound, which got Sparks howling in pain.

Quickly his eyes shoot back to Grayson with a devilish smile and an emotion behind those eyes that can be described as hell's gates in his eyes - dark, sinister, and all bad. And with this smile, he answered her: “You wanted me to train the little rat, only that she refused to follow my orders and didn’t train at all. So I got the lazy rat running. And… all it should take… was a little… encouragement…from Tickler.”

Sheriff Grayson couldn’t believe what message her ears and head just received. It felt like a call to arms, where you know that you march into a fight that can not be won, no matter how hard you fight. “Sparks… you are hereby demoted from your rank as ‘Junior Sheriff’ and I’ll order an investigation with subsequent legal proceedings against you. Let your wound be treated and report to the Council representative for any further questions regarding legal consequences. Dismissed!"

Spark kept smiling while he walked past Sheriff Grayson only answering a short, “Yes Ma’am”, and walking to Madame Wonders to let his wound be treated.

Meanwhile Professor Heimerdinger walked up to her and they both walked outside for a little private conversation. “Well done Sheriff, well done. Justice prevailed once more today!”, said Heimerdinger with an unknown happiness in his voice, but Grayson knew it better.

“Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, Professor. Sparks has friends in high places and to make matters worse: the council hates the Undercity and its people even more than all of the Noxian legates who are present in Piltover right now. This action just now could also be me sailing against the wind… who knows…”, she held her head down, lost in thought if she really made the right decision.

“Nonsense dear.”, cuts Heimerdinger's voice through her fog of thought. “Your decision was right - no matter where we come from or under which circumstances we are born, everyone deserves a chance to reach the very top of their abilities.”

Grayson was downright impressed, she never really thought about it that much, but she agreed with Heimerdinger. With a smile on her lips she asked, “Did you make that up right now?”

“No dear…”, now Heimerdinger smiles too “… it is a part of my ‘Back to school speech’. It’s as old as these hallways.”

You awakened in your room again. But surprisingly your back didn’t hurt anymore - but your whole body was kind of sore. Moaning and groaning, you sat up and were greeted by a letter on your nightstand. You grabbed the fancy-looking paper and opened the envelope.

“Meet me in my office, when you’ve rested. Be dressed for training, and don’t fear Sparks - he won't be there for a while.

~ Sheriff Grayson”

You had to read the letter three times over before you could really realize its existence in your hand. The Sheriff orders you to come to her office… fear crept up in your chest again. Opening up a pitch-black hole which eats everything light and happy. You dropped the letter like it burns your skin and crawled into the far corner of your bed. You couldn’t go - they would kill you as soon as you opened the door, for what you did yesterday… and then you would end up like the boy… buried in the river waves.

‘No, no, no, no, no!‘, you said to yourself like a mantra to command the evil demons from you that want to devour your heart and mind. Eat you alive and drag you to the deepest depths of Janna‘s punitive prison for all the wrongdoers and criminals. Because that's what you are by birth - a criminal… a rat from the Undercity. Worthy of nothing but the dirt under someone else's boots. You fold your hands protectively over your head - reliving the torture of Sparks in your head for the God-knows-how-many times. You cried, cried even more, cried until you ran out of tears and further. The demon wouldn’t let go of your heart and body, squeeze it, twist it, tormenting itself. Then all of a sudden you heard a scream outside of your window. You shrieked hard but at the same time your attention shifted fully to the scream. There was another and another and another - not screams of pain… more like battle cries. While standing up from the bed you dried your tears with the tip of the shirt you wear for sleeping and slowly walked to the window.

The moment your eyes peeked outside of the window, you could see the rising sun, and standing in the rising sun were men bathed in sweat, training. You saw people doing hand-to-hand combat - fists flying so fast you could barely follow them until one of them landed on the ground hard, a cut on his face. In the other corner of the training field, you could see people training with long sticks - they were as long as two third of their body, so you guess. Swinging them like athletes in a circus the men hit each other with the stick parrying, blocking, dodging, and landing blows. You could barely hear the whistle on the outside of your window, but the men suddenly stop and give their sticks to other men and, then started the stick-fighting.

In the down left corner was a separate space, which was marked and only walkable through a single entrance. You see Enforcers with pistols and rifles aiming at drawn silhouettes of people.

You hear someone shouting “Ready…Aim…FIRE!!“ and then you hear countless bullets fly, hitting the silhouettes in various places, hitting the wall behind them, flying into the red to blue drawn sky.

“CEASE FIRE!!!“ and every person shooting immediately stops and secures their weapon. Now they all walk to the tattered papers and seem to discuss who’s bullet flew where and why. You roll your eyes - totally boring. Then you see her - the sheriff standing on the side, watching her soldiers like a shepherd does his sheep. Her eyes wandered over the training ground - watching every move, every behavior between the soldiers. She seems lost in thoughts for a moment and her eyes climb up the house walls like sunbeams illuminating the world and she spots you at your window. You can only vaguely see her smile, but she waves at you and gestures for you to come down to her.

Her smile was as warm as the sun and the warmth filled you inside out, blasting away all the demons that had held their deadly grip on you. With the sunlight making your feet fly, you got dressed for training and flew out to the training grounds.

You stormed out of the front door to the grounds only to be met with angry men looking at you like you’re yesterday's toast. So you stopped dead in your tracks, terrified. But you stood your ground, didn’t flinch, didn’t move a bit.

“It’s ok boys, let her go - she’s going to train with us for a while now.“, said a female voice. A big ‚OH‘ made its round among the men and everybody went back to their training. You saw Sheriff Grayson making her way to you, just casually walking between the men like she is on a stroll in the city center. She stopped right in front of you and smiled. “So little one, are you better now?“

You nodded because your voice just had the idea to make itself comfortable in your throat and not come out of your mouth.

“Does your back still hurt?“ You shake your head to say ‚no‘.

Sheriff Grayson tilted her head to one side. “Can you still speak or did you snore so loudly in your sleep that you lost your voice?“ she said and her smile now changed into something challenging. You could hold yourself from giggling. “Now little one, I don’t want to call you ‘Little One‘ all day - so please tell me your name.“

You tell her your name and hold out your hand to Sheriff Grayson like your mother taught you. Grayson bows down to your level takes your hand and gently shakes it.

“It’s very nice to finally meet you properly.” she said. You began to really like Sheriff Grayson - she never talked you down all the time and treats you like an actual human being with dignity.

She signals you to follow her and the both of you walk to the area of the training ground she calls “the martial arts mats“. You had no idea what ‘martial arts‘ are - but you were sure that you would soon find out. On arriving at the mats you saw an elderly man, shouting orders at the Enforcers and them obeying as their life depended on it. He turned to the Sheriff once you were close enough, saluting.

“Vise, I give our new recruit to you - train her in everything she needs to know for our job. About her other…“ she stumbled a bit on how to describe something, “… ability - we will find out how to train it. So please focus on making her a model Enforcer - I know she has the capabilities to be the best in our core.“

The old man's face showed an expression that you could mistake for a smile of excitement and happiness - you really couldn’t say for sure. Sheriff Grayson grins for a moment before walking away. Then all of a sudden Vice grabbed your left wrist and dragged you right into the middle of one ring. There he stands opposite you, fists his hands, and takes the position of a heavyweight boxer. The front fist is at his shoulder level and the second fist provides a cover over his chest.

“Try this, grasshopper.“, he says with a smile, his eyes pointed directly at you. Without an answer, you try to mimic his position and when you had a good stand, he quickly threw a punch at you. Your eyes widen your heart rate increases, and the fear of being hurt rattles your entire body. In an attempt to protect yourself, you step backward and by a hair's breadth, you dodge it.

“You are a natural, grasshopper,” says Vise and motions for you to attack him. You are y so scared you could shit yourself, so you step now forward, close your eyes, and hope to land the punch. A fist lands in your face so hard that you are thrown off your feet and painfully land on your back.

“NO GRASSHOPPER, NEVER CLOSE YOUR EYES. NOT UNLESS YOU WANNA DIE,“ Vice yells at you and his face starts to glow red in rage. He has the same commanding voice as Sparks and every brain cell in you engages unknown defense mechanisms within you. You step back in fear, every fiber in your body screams fire, and on your shoulders, flames start to flare up. You hold your hands in front of you as a defense against your opponent. Now all eyes are on you in a mix of fear and fascination for the unknown. Vice steps back - rather than fear, confusion painted his face. Sheriff Grayson came running towards you but stopped dead in her tracks when she sees you’re unharmed- also watching you in fascination.

“Don’t hurt me…“ your voice cracked and you started crying again. Your body started hurting again, which only fueled your fire. The mats around your feet began to crack open, change colors and burn up slowly. Know you can hear weapons being drawn and pointed right at you from various directions - all with malicious intentions.

“Stand down!“, Sheriff Graysons’ voice echoed through the tense air but yet nobody intended to follow her orders. “I SAID STAND DOWN!“ she yelled.

After that incident and after you calmed down Vice apologized for his temper and that he yelled at you and the Sheriff explained that Sparks tortured you for your fire powers. That his treatment probably caused trauma inside you. Vice didn’t answer - he instead took you by the arm again and you got into the ring again. This time he explained the steps more patiently and you quickly adapted to them. You trained all day until the sun went down - you didn’t even notice how time flew.

“That’s enough for today, grasshopper. We will continue tomorrow,” Vice said and he made a proud face. “You did well on your first day of training. Have you had to fight before?“

“Well…“, you tried to remember when exactly you fought for the first time. “… I had to fight a lot in the Undercity. There is never enough for us - I was hungry a lot of times because other kids stole my food. So I had to show them that they shouldn’t do that. Then there was that thing in the mines…“

Vices brows shoot up. “You were in the mines? Children shouldn’t be there!“, he said and you just shrugged - did he have no idea what’s going on in the Undercity?

“Yeah I was in the mines. It’s the only way to get money to buy food.“, you shrugged again - he really had no idea how things run down there. “It’s actually not that bad, but thanks to my special ability people thought I could withstand the toxic gas better than others. I couldn‘t - but in time I could breathe the air in the mines more easily. And so I could earn more money for more food - easy math right?“ The next hour you both stared into the sundown until the sky was covered in dark blue and sprinkled with the prettiest of stars - shining like diamonds in a light beam.

The whole team was shocked to hear Vice apologizing to somebody at all - he was not exactly known for having any feelings. But after training together - you and Vice became very close on a professional basis and of course, Sparks returned after the “internal investigation“ went by “without any recognizable misdemeanors“. So of course he was responsible to train you again. This time under close supervision of Vice and the Sheriff. But whenever Sparks was alone with you - the torture continued until you graduated and got a job as a special force enforcer. After that Sparks couldn’t get close to you anymore, but every time you met him, he had this… absurd behavior of staring at you with his slimy smile and a disgusting shine in his eyes.

During the rest of your training, you learned everything an Enforcer needed and perfected every skill to the highest level so that you became a model among the Enforcers. You know every martial art style from Piltover (Vice even trained you in the martial arts style of Noxus - the country where he was born), you learned how to spy, how to silence your target from the shadows, how to shoot with any kind of short distance weapon, how to sharp shoot people in the distance and how to squeeze information out of people to and use it against them. They called you a “Model rat“ behind your back. Just like in school, it hurt - but your father still could hit harder.

Yet ever since that moment of self-defense nobody except Vice and Sheriff Grayson looked at you like a person but more like a real-life monster…

End of Chapter 2

Billie Eilish „all the good girls go to hell“ (end of chapter)

#silco x aurelia #silcoxreader #silco fanfic #silco x you #silco x oc #silco x reader #arcane silco #silco arcane #silco fic #silco x f!reader

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kalliopeia · 2 years ago

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Daisuke Takahashi - Cutting Edge 2005

Congratulations to Kana and Daisuke for an amazing performance at Worlds! I'm so glad they finally managed to skate a program that they're happy with, in front of the home crowd.

When I first heard that Phantom of the Opera would be Kanadai's FD this season, I was skeptical. But it made for an amazing story. I still remember 2007 Worlds so vividly -- I tuned in to the live audio stream of British Eurosport at 4am (there was no video stream back then!) and cried with happiness when Daisuke won the silver medal. I never imagined that another lifetime later, he'd be skating to Phantom at Worlds again, this time as an ice dancer.

The legacy that Daisuke has left on the sport is undeniable. Mark Hanretty said during the ISU broadcast that so many of the 180 competitors at Worlds cited Daisuke as an inspiration. It's pretty incredible that even after becoming a two-time World Champion, Shoma stated that he still wants to be able to give a performance like Daisuke.

The first interview I ever read from Daisuke was from Cutting Edge 2005, where he said that he hopes that his skating will remain in people's hearts in the future. It's so heartwarming to know that has come true.

I translated this interview and posted it on FSUniverse in 2006. The site I used to host the original translation is gone now, but sometimes I still see parts of the interview quoted in various places. Here's the full interview and scans of from the original book.

Daisuke Takahashi Surging Brilliance and Passion (Translated from Cutting Edge 2005)

At the age of 16, he obtained the honor of becoming Japan's first men's Junior World Champion. The boy who was expected to become the ace of the next generation turns 20 this season. He has fluid skating, splendid footwork, and a natural spark that captures the hearts of spectators. If he conquers his competitive weakness, he has the ability to become the World Champion. Not a former Junior World Champion, but a true World Champion someday. A firm goal can be seen before his passionate gaze.

Those effortless jumps in exhibitions, those intense steps. If only he showed that energy in shows in competition... Daisuke Takahashi, who always makes people nervous, was even more lackluster than usual in the first half of the 2004-2005 season. In the Grand Prix Series' Trophee Eric Bompard, he was in third place after the short program, but fell four times in the free and ended up eleventh. At the important Japanese Nationals, he finished a nightmarish sixth. What happened to him in the critical pre-Olympics season?

Where did the passion for skating go?

"Last year... I hated skating. I didn't want to do it. I had an injury, but it wasn't very serious, so that wasn't the reason. Why... I don't know, but I hated being on the ice. In practice, I'd think, 'I've already skated for 30 minutes,' but not even 10 minutes had passed... When I skated, time somehow felt longer. My feelings weren't into it at all.

When I got injured in September and took a break for a while, I thought, I've done nothing but skating up until now. All through high school, I had gone from school to the rink. I'd go to school and practice in Okayama, and then go to Osaka on the weekends to practice. ...With that kind of lifestyle, I never had any fun. I didn't know how to have fun.

Then in April I started college and moved to Osaka. My environment changed, and I became more independent. When you can take care of your everyday life and school matters on your own, your perspective changes, right? So then I thought... 'Is it okay for me to only focus on skating?' But even though I thought I'd do other things, in the end I didn't do anything. I still felt that I had to skate. But when I went to the rink, I didn't want to skate at all. I neither skated well, nor had any fun doing other things. If I couldn't participate in the special training camp... I definitely would've quit skating. The reason I didn't quit was because I was at the level where I couldn't quit by my own will. That's all. But anyway, my feelings of hatred towards skating were really strong last year..."

Due to his major environment change, he began to question his life of solely skating. In the 2004-2005 season, Daisuke Takahashi wholly felt the difficulty of the sport of figure skating, where mental doubts show up in one's skating itself. But he did not end his career like this, for he is the man who went as far as becoming the Junior World Champion.

"But those feelings finally subsided when I finished sixth at Nationals in December. I thought, ah, the season is over now. Strangely, when I thought that, the turmoil disappeared. Then after Nationals was the Medalists on Ice show. I was called to participate even though I was sixth, and at first I didn't want to go. 'I'm not a medalist, so I won't go!' I said. But my coach Nagamitsu-sensei told me, 'Go anyway,' so I went reluctantly. But it turned out to be really fun! I skated to Secret Garden's 'Nocturne,' a song I chose myself. The program was a very simple one that I also choreographed myself. Since the shows were right after Nationals, I was tired after the first of the three. But as I skated, they became more and more fun. I skated happily for an audience with a program I chose and created myself! From then on, I was gradually able to think once again that skating really is fun."

Along with his recovered feelings, his skating visibly regained its spark. In Medalists on Ice, he showed unbelievable jumps and skating that made spectators think, "This is the sixth place finisher?" At the beginning of the new year, he placed first at the Universiade, and finished on an international podium again with a third place at the Four Continents Championships. Unable to maintain his good results, he finished fifteenth at the World Championships, but even so, his revitalized expression after the season's end was like a different person's.

"So last season was the season where I grew to hate skating once, but then became able to love it again. Because that happened last year, my feelings this year are different. Of course, practices are still tiresome, but I'll never slog through them reluctantly like last year. I practice decisively now with refreshed feelings. So every day, when I'm done practicing, I feel good. I don't know how that'll turn out in competition, though. (laughs)

But the biggest difference from last year is that I don't just 'wish' in competitions now. My thoughts last year like, 'I wonder if I can land this jump, it'll be nice if I can,' were merely 'wishes.' But this year, I don't wish; I have strong feelings of, 'I'll land it' or 'I won't fail.' I've practiced to have that kind of confidence this year!"

Those new feelings have already appeared on the ice. At the Japan International Challenge in October, he defeated foreign skaters and placed second! The voices of, "I want to see Daisuke in Torino!" continue to build.

Daisuke Takahashi's Craftsmanship

He captivates spectators with his beautiful skating, and excites them with his triple axels and quadruple jumps. When he sends his strong gaze to the audience, his steps have even more force. When he's on, Daisuke Takahashi is almost unrivaled. Many fans had been waiting anxiously for him, thinking, "I wanted to see this kind of male skater!" Just how was this kind of skater born?

"When I was little... I was weak, and I hated going to school. (laughs) My parents were worried about me, so they made me try many different sports. I have three older brothers, and all of them did Shaolin Kung Fu. But Shaolin is painful, isn't it? I hate pain. It's scary! At first I thought about doing hockey, which is also skating, but I couldn't do it because I was scared of getting hit in the chin. I really am a coward. (laughs)

Other than martial arts and hockey though, I originally thought gymnastics might be good. But the gymnastics place was far away in inner Okayama, so it would've been difficult for my mother to drop me off and pick me up there. So I tried skating thanks to a friend's suggestion, and it was really fun!

What about skating was fun... I can't remember anymore. I don't remember what about it was fun at all, but anyway, it was fun. I didn't take skating lessons with the intention of becoming a serious athlete, or because I admired anyone. I just started it normally, without thinking about anything. When I was little, I used to joke around saying, 'I'm going to skate in the Olympics!' but it really was just a joke. I skated really contentedly just thinking of it as a hobby.

But... when I won Junior Worlds in my first year of high school, I thought, 'I have to do this as a serious athlete' for the first time. That I can't just do this as a hobby. I felt that I had to become a responsible athlete. To think that... shouldn't have been so difficult. But after Junior Worlds, I was completely awful in seniors, right? I might've tried too hard to become serious after skating as a hobby for so long... No, I didn't try hard enough to be able say that (laughs), but these past few years, I tried too hard with only my feelings. With those feelings accumulating for so long... last year, I just thought, 'I don't want to skate anymore.'

But even though I say that, it's not that grandiose of a story! When I talk about it like this, it sounds exaggerated. (laughs)"

Skating fixations, style fixations

The boy who attracted great expectations due to his talent and potential forgot his feelings of "Skating is fun" and "I love skating" somewhere down the line. But now that he has remembered that important something, he is able to laugh away all the hardships he has had. One can also see his relaxed attitude towards skating.

"Truthfully, there aren't really any skaters that I aim to be like. Of course, I like certain parts about skaters; for example, I want Nobunari-kun's flexibility. But this year I've been working on my flexibility, so I've become a little more flexible! Also, I want Jeffrey Buttle's transitions. His transitions between elements and connection to the music are really amazing. There are various skaters whom I want to steal things from like that, but none of whom I think, 'Everything about him is great!' Because Takahashi's ideals are high. (laughs)

But there's the actor Joe Odagiri, right? I love him! I love his atmosphere. He has this mysterious air about him that other people don't have, right?

I admire that mysterious charm, so although I'm not trying to imitate Odagiri-san, I'd like to show that kind of charm that attracts both men and women in my skating. Do I think I'm handsome? I've never been conscious about that kind of thing! No, I don't, I don't. (laughs) I'm trying to become handsome, though! Because out of the four brothers in my family, I'm the plainest. I don't look like my three older brothers at all. Ah, I think the second eldest has gotten a little chubby lately, and has become a little dirty looking?

My brothers never talk about skating. Their attitude is, 'Why don't you just do what you want?' Though they do cooperate with me... Generally, my brothers don't watch my skating. (laughs) But it's easier that way. Isn't it easier to go home and not talk about skating? We talk about completely unrelated things, like they ask me, 'Have you gotten any presents from girls?'

Since I have those brothers, I'm not popular at all. (laughs) I'm bad with girls. Actually, I think girls are scary. (laughs) My skating friends are fine, but... I'm bad with girls I like. I can't talk to them at all. But I look okay with long hair, right? Didn't I look better when I had long hair? My choreographer in America, Nikolai, cut my current hair! Though, I had planned for a better hairstyle...

There's that much of a difference between my normal self and my skating self?

No, there's no difference. I'm always like this. But when I'm on the ice... I like people watching me. I want everyone to watch me. Starting from practice, I want people to watch me, not other skaters. I might really want to stand out! So when I come to Nobeyama, I skate while conscious of people around me. Anyway, I want to become really famous!

I want to become a skater that everyone in Japan knows. So I think of Miki Ando as my rival. (laughs) Though we haven't really become rivals at all. Huh, this interview is going to become a book? The picture you just took will be the cover? Seriously? I'll buy it when it comes out! You'll send me one? Yay!"

To Torino, with Nikolai Morozov's programs!

He says there's no difference between his off-ice and on-ice persona. But when this friendly young man stands on the ice, he turns into the ultimate entertainer who draws all eyes to him. Mysteriously, he shows us a completely different Daisuke Takahashi. But that's probably the Daisuke Takahashi who mischievously thinks, "I want to stand out, I want to attract people's attention." This year, a new choreographer who helps to bring out his entertainer quality even more joined Takahashi's team.

"My choreographer this year is Nikolai Morozov. At first, I thought about asking Lori Nichol. But when Nagamitsu-sensei suggested, 'How about Morozov?' I thought, 'Ah, that might be good...' Right when I heard Morozov's name, I thought, 'That might be good.' Just based on my feelings, I thought Nikolai might be better than Lori. I'd never had choreography done by either of them before. When I was with Tatiana [Tarasova] last year and the year before, Nikolai had already split from her. So that's how I went to Morovoz's place in America for the first time this year... There was no need to give him my opinions at all. I'm plenty satisfied with what he created! Since Nikolai's ideas just came flowing out one after the other, rather than telling him, 'I want to do this,' at first I had trouble trying to see how well I could do what he asked of me.

After Nikolai made my programs in America, he also looked after my practices... Nikolai used to be an ice dancer, so there are a lot of dancers around him like Ukraine's Grushina/Goncharov and Russia's Kulikova/Markov... Besides getting choreography, I learned a lot of things by watching Nikolai's practices with them. In Japan, the rink I used to skate at closed down, and the rink I skate at now is hard to commute to. But I was able to practice in a good environment this year thanks to my connection to Nikolai. Since I was able to practice well in the off-season, I don't want to lose to Nikolai's choreography! My free program this year is Rachmaninov's Piano Concerto, so I don't want to lose to Rachmaninov's music either! I want to show my own interpretation of it."

The Morozov programs he chose by intuition fit him perfectly. They are dramatic and sensational. In 2005-2006, the Olympic season arrives, as if it had been waiting for his mental growth and new choreographer. If he makes it, it will be his first Olympics. What kind of skating does he intend to show us?

"I haven't had many performances that I've truly been satisfied with. The only ones I can say were really good are this year's free program from the Universiade and the short program from the World Championships in Germany. And, well, the performances that I won Junior Worlds with. That's about it. Those are the only ones I think were 'complete' performance-wise, regardless of the jumps.

In competitions, I'm always overwhelmed. When I skate, I don't think about anything. When I receive applause during the steps I'm happy that the audience is cheering me on, but I can only feel like that for a split second during the performance. This is different in shows and exhibitions. Because I can be at ease with feelings like, 'It'd be nice if both the audience and I have fun.' That's why Dreams on Ice wasn't bad.

But this year, I want to have more satisfying performances in competition! My goal is to go to the Olympics, and I'm aiming for... the podium! I want to have a goal that's at least that high. (laughs) Everyone is serious this year aiming for the Olympics, which only one person can go to. Of course, I'm aware of the others. Even if we practice together, I don't dislike anyone. So if someone else goes instead of me, I want to cheer him on. I want to fight everyone without any bad feelings. But of course, other people have nothing to do with my own skating. So even above that, I want to have my own goals. I'll continue working on my flexibility, becoming more flexible little by little over the next four years, towards my final goal of Vancouver. I'm thinking of Torino as a stepping stone... but without abandoning my feelings of wanting to medal. If I'm lucky, that is. (laughs)

In Vancouver... it'd be nice if I could become the Olympic Champion. I want not only the people who watch at that time, but also young skaters way in the future, when I become an old man, to see my skating. My goal is to become good enough so that people will watch videos of me and say, 'Daisuke Takahashi was really good.' So that my skating will remain in the hearts of people who watched the Olympics. So that it will resonate in their hearts, no matter how many years pass. In order to make my skating have that kind of worth... Takahashi skates today!"

This was the interview he gave during the training camp. After we finished talking, he headed straight to the rink. His extremely serious appearance while skating, and his bright appearance while joking with friends... Hiding his tough heart with a smile, to Torino, to Vancouver. His journey continues. And someday, everyone in the world, not just Japan, will surely know of Daisuke Takahashi.

#daisuke takahashi #kana muramoto #kanadai #worlds 2023 #figure skating

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theserpentsadvocate · 1 year ago

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I'm getting so much writing done right now that I'm actually considering starting to post one of the longfics, but I'm coming up against the problem of: then they'd need a TITLE.

So while I wrestle with that one, here are some lines I'm proud of (excited by, love and want to cradle like a baby, etc.) from what I'm working on right now, because I'm very excited and want to share what I'm working on. Feel free to ask for context/details/more; I love that stuff. (Or, since most of them are on here, feel free to guess the fic.)

“We were just cutting through. We’ll be out of your way in a minute and you can go back to… whatever you were doing.” He doesn’t quite manage to disguise the fact that he’s definitely assuming ‘whatever Weevil was doing’ is either a drug deal or some kind of grand theft construction equipment.

He tastes like himself, like bad coffee and three years apart, like salt from her tears.

Because Gia’s right. They’re all dead. Meg and Cervando and Duncan and every other kid on the bus, Ms Dumas and the driver, and every last drop of hope she had that things would be different, that she could crawl out from the shadow of Lilly’s death and be a person again, all dead.

This means Veronica can go straight from the airport to the hospital, sign all the paperwork while trying no to look at her mother’s slack face. She’s still breathing, but Veronica knows that’s a lie. The doctors explained it very thoroughly. And Veronica’s all about the truth. So.

He pulled back a little, enough she could get a look at his face, which was displaying an emotion somewhere between annoyed and pissed off. It was not, she imagined, how guys were supposed to look when they were having sex with you.

“I understand why she hates me. You’re her brother, she has to be on your side. But why is she mad at you?” Eli snorts with something like bitter amusement. “Because I ran off her cartel hitman boyfriend, and now he won’t call her.”

Well done, Frebec, he thought. Couldn’t stop finding the worst in the situation, could you? Well, now the worst in the situation has found you.

Maybe it’s just that this is what she does – take on losing battles because she feels sorry for someone, dig around for a sordid truth even when there’s an easy, palatable answer.

“So! Spinach ravioli bake! We got the spinach! We got the ravioli! We got the… bake!” He pointed dramatically to the oven.

Sometimes Rita acted as if he could have avoided the whole thing by not being the kind of person people planted guns on, as if the business and the mortgage and the high school reunion counted for nothing, as if a Latino man with tattoos who stopped to help Celeste Kane wouldn’t have been shot if he didn’t have a record.

“Why would you want to date a guy who can’t handle you asking him out?” “Because I care more about getting laid than feminism?” Rhianna offered, half-apologetically.

God, this had been a mistake. What was she doing rifling through people’s personal lives like this was something she had any authority to make judgements on? She wasn’t even a junior in high school, how was she supposed to judge if this made Lilly more or less safe, if it meant that Eli Navarro had a disgust of abusive men or just that he was horrifically violent when provoked, if justice had been served to anyone involved in the Pereira case.

The semi-darkness and the looming equipment and the cool night air had made them feel young and invincible, probably for the last time.

She couldn’t have stopped it. There’s nothing she can do to stop him from doing what he wants, but here she is, tidying up toys in the living room of a known criminal, wiping down the kitchen table of someone under arrest for gang activity, singing a lullaby to the daughter of the man who came home late with bloody hands, who threatened a material witness in his own trial, who served three months for assault because the DA couldn’t prove murder. That’s a choice she made.

Even her hair was a mess, floating every which way like the girl in the mirror was some sixties flower child come to a bad seventies end.

He was too busy trying to figure out if he should intervene and how he should intervene, which was hard enough after a life of trying to stay out of other people’s problems, even without worrying about the ramifications of outing himself to Jade’s gangbanger ex and his… yacht gang? Was that a thing?

Hector shrugs uncomfortably. “You know. I mean, come on, man. You yelled at Molly Fitzpatrick that you loved him in front of the whole school.”

Maybe that’s that. She doesn’t really believe that, but she feels so drained and hollow, an empty casing stripped of meaningful parts, that it pulls her in anyway. Maybe that’s all, and she can stop trying. She lets herself believe that for thirty-five minutes, until the muted roar of the motorcycle dispels it like so much dust.

With all her friends dropping her like a hot potato at best and sleeping with her boyfriend at worst, it was weirdly nice that the scary stranger she was revenge-fucking cared about whether or not she was in pain, even when he was pissed off at her for being a lousy lay. And wasn’t that a hell of a summary of her life at the moment.

“I don’t know,” she said. “I mean, I have to tell him, but I don’t even know… having a kid is crazy, right? I don’t even really want to, and anyway it’ll screw up our friendship, and it was bad enough after we slept together; it got all weird for a bit and I really missed him, even more than I thought I would. Dealing with this would be so much worse, and I don’t know… I felt pretty good about getting an abortion when I thought it was Evan’s kid, but now it feels kind of weird, and I don’t even know if he – what?” Mac’s eyes had been getting wider and wider as Veronica spoke, and now that her mouth was hanging open it wasn’t possible to ignore it any longer. “Veronica,” Mac squeaked. “Did you sleep with Wallace?”

The man in the chair beside the bed doesn’t even look like her friend. All the Weevil-ness has bled out of him, and he’s just… Eli.

"And tell your thug boyfriend to stop stealing my mail!" "I don't know how he's doing that from an aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific."

Ophelia is soft and sweet, sniffing slightly in her sleep as if she hasn’t ever really entirely stopped crying since she watched her mother die, but she snuggles up to Veronica as if she’s safety, and Veronica feels like a fraud.

Duncan is dead, just like Lilly, and he’ll never hold her again, or make stupid jokes about curveballs, or remember his sister. He won’t see Aaron Echolls go to prison and he won’t graduate from high school and he won’t become the world’s most reluctant president. He’s dead and she’ll never see him again.

The feelings didn’t even have the decency to take turns, they just swallowed her all at once, contradicting each other, and it made her feel crazy.

#look this isn't NOT me fishing for feedback and investment but mostly i just need to get something out there so i don't explode #veronica mars #earth's children #(only one but i'm very proud of that line so it stays)#fanfic #my own work #what i'm doing it trying to hit the daily nano goal for writing in general #i'm not actually doing nano; it's split between various fics #but so far i've been pulling it off and i'm pretty pleased with myself #revenge gambit fic

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jonathanvik · 2 years ago

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Starlight Dream - Chapter 48

“Well, well. Look who’s walked into the wrong neighborhood?” A freckled teen with a pompadour said.

“Oh dear, is the little girl lost?” Another thug said, getting into Arisu’s face.

Despite the four punks surrounding her, each with a weapon in easy reach, Arisu kept her usual steely eyes as she glared at them. She had to admire their guts. She’d made high schoolers wet themselves with that glower.

“It’s a free street, dumbass. Step aside.”

“Some mouth for a little brat.” The largest said, leaning closer to her face. “This daughter of a worthless drunk needs to learn some manners! You’re talking to the Guardian of Koiwa No. 4 Junior High!”

This comment made Arisu’s right eye twitch, the only emotion revealed on her face. Nothing earned her ire more than insulting her father. She might have spared them an ass-kicking if it wasn’t for that comment.

“Gah!” The leader howled in pain as he received a sudden knee to the gut, blowing the wind from his lungs.

“Boss!” His gang responded by pulling out their weapons, butter knives, chains, wooden kendo swords and other instruments of death. This only earned a slight smile from Arisu. She’d enjoy this.

“You’ll regret this, brat!” The leader gasped, hulled away on the shoulders of his buddies. Arisu watched with disdain as the Koiwa No. 4 Junior High students limped away. Serves them right for trying to encroach on the territory of Daini Kameido Junior. As a Guardian herself, called the Kameido Queen by some, she couldn’t allow such a blatant challenge to go unchallenged.

But such was Arisu’s life in her short twelve years, in a world where only the strongest survived. Frankly, Arisu thought she'd let them off lightly. After finally lighting her cigarette with her favorite lighter, she walked to school.

She was late, of course, but nobody cared. The homeroom was rowdy as usual, with students laughing and carousing, instead of doing any schoolwork, the home teacher was nowhere in sight, too scared of the delinquents in his class. But such was Daini Kameido Junior High School, the shithole home to the worst kids in Koto. The adults had long since given up trying to save them.

“Hey, Arisu!” But one student was studying, her vibrant pink hair swishing as she lifted from her book as Arisu took her desk.

“Hey, Hinata,” Arisu waved to her cousin, the only girl who didn’t deserve to go to this shithole of a school. Unlike the rest of them, she actually had some brains. Not that she wasn’t a delinquent herself; her dyed pink hair was evidence of that. “You’re hurt! Your cheek is bleeding.”

It was true, crimson dripping onto her dark blue sailor suit. Thanks to its color, however, the stain won’t be noticeable. “Some idiot pulled a knife on me.” Arisu gave a genuine smile. Besides her pops, Hinata was the only person who gave a crap about her. “Only a scratch. No big deal.”

Hinata frowned but otherwise said nothing. She knew her cousin’s propensity for getting into fights. It didn’t stop her from worrying about her.

After a school day in which nothing was learned, she joined Hinata as they walked home. As usual, Arisu smoked as she walked. It was a habit Hinata hated but tolerated for her cousin’s sake.

“You need to check it out. It’s super fun,” Hinata said. “The new arcade has this shooting game I’m sure you’d like.”

“Not today. I got Guardian business day. Some Ariake Junior jumped Matsuyama the other day, and I need to pay them a visit.” Even if she thought the guy was a class-act moron, Arisu protected her own.

“Okay.” Hinata sagged, disappointed.

Before Arisu turned to leave, her cousin stopped her. “Is this all you want for your life, Arisu?”

“What do you mean?”

“All this fighting. Don’t you want to do more? Do better? You can’t just spend your entire life fighting on the streets.”

After taking a long drag of her cigarette, Arisu looked away. “Got nothing else. Someone like me has no future. I accepted that long ago. You’re the only one who’s got a chance to be anything. Unlike my dumb ass, you’re smart.”

“Arisu.” Hinata faltered, lost for words. Arisu vanished down an alley. There was nothing to say.

Before anything else, Arisu checked into her apartment. It was a rundown dump in the worst part of Kota. Past due bills greeted her as she passed the mailbox, trash was scattered across the floor. Snoring at the dinner table was her father, drunk again.

After the economic bubble collapsed, Japan went downhill, and her father was one of many who’d lost their job and suffered. Unable to find another job, he’d turned to drink. Only money from her grandparents kept them afloat. She spent the next half-hour cleaning up trash and discarded beer bottles, tidying up the best she could.

“I’ll come back with dinner, poppa,” Arisu said, kissing her sleeping father on the cheek. After a half-muttered sleepy thanks, her father fell back to sleep. After turning off the light, she left their apartment.

“If I recall, those Ariake Junior like hanging around the seaside.” There’d be at least fifteen to deal with. Tough bastards, all of them. She brought along a baseball bat for insurance in case things got messy. A white surgical mask covered her face, proof she was entering a serious battle. With these odds, Arisu didn’t dare hold back.

People scattered as she approached. Arisu had developed an infamous reputation in the neighborhood, and others wisely kept their distance. Her metal bat sparked as it dragged along the pavement, eager to bust some skulls.

“What’s that you’re eating, fatty?” A girl said from a side street.

“Oink. Oink. Pigging out as usual.” Another said.

Two girls were tormenting a younger girl from their school, laughing at her as she tried to eat her bento box. The girl said nothing, looking down, not wanting to cause any fuss. The two bullies laughed and pointed, enjoying how they were making the other girl squirm. They yelped as a bat banged against a nearby metal sign, whitening as they saw who’d caused the sound.

“You have some nerve showing your faces around here,” Arisu said, swinging her bat across her shoulder. “I’m in a bad mood. Wanna meet a good friend of mine?”

“No, sorry!” The two bullies scattered to the wind. In their haste, they’d dropped their bags. Arisu beamed and crouched down, helping herself to whatever money they had.

“You really need to stick up for yourself, Kaguya,” Arisu said, pocketing some coins. “Those dumbasses shouldn’t talk to you like that.”

“I’m not as strong as you.” The girl said, looking down. “Never will be.”

They’d known each other back in elementary school as friends of sorts. Kaguya had been a heavier girl then, a prime target for bullying. She’d shed that weight, but the stigma had still carried to her new school.

“You sell yourself short,” Arisu said, standing up. “It’s about attitude. Got that, and people won’t dare bother you.”

“You make it sound easy,” Kaguya said, bitterness creeping into her voice. “Some of us aren’t you, Ikehara.”

Arisu sighed, shaking her head. Maybe someday her old friend would learn some spine and show her inner demon. But that was Kaguya’s problem. It was nothing she could fix. After saying her goodbyes, the stinging scent of the sea struck her nostrils.

The sound of punks guffawing and jesting grew louder as she approached, Ariake Junior making their presence known through graffiti and tags. They’d made an abandoned warehouse their home, its owners long scared away by the Ariake thugs. Two guards blocked her way, their bodies blocking their hideout’s broken, rusted entrance.

“What are you doing here?” One crouching thug said, taking a swig from a beer can. “Get lost, kid. Else you’ll get hurt.”

“You idiot, that’s the Kameido Queen, Arisu Ikehara!” Another thug said, trembling.

“What?” The first dropped his beer can in surprise, hair-raising in tension.

“Got some business with your boss. Ya gonna move, or do I have t’a make you?” Arisu crouched down and lit a cigarette, showing her most unappealing smile as she pulled away her mask to reveal her face.

“Um.” Both guards trembled, knowing their day had turned for the worst.

“Don’t worry, I got this.” A massive brute exited the warehouse, glowering at the impudent intruder. Almost a year and a half her senior, he’d grown to an impressive size, nearly twice her height. But Arisu was unintimidated, taking another disinterested drag on her cigarette.

“Kenji Ono,” Arisu said, matching the giant brute eye to eye from her crouched position. “One of your idiots hurt someone from my school. The guy’s a fool, but we at Daini Kameido Junior have a reputation to protect.”

“That right?” Ono passed a comb through his pompadour, his tone just as disinterested. “And you expect to do something about it on your lonesome?”

“Against you wusses?” Arisu gave a dismissive snort. “I won’t even need to break a sweat.”

“Why you!” One thug lost his temper, pulling out a metal chain, eager to strangle the intruder to death. But his boss stopped him.

“Temper. You’re just as bold as I’ve heard, Arisu Ikehara. I’m going to enjoy this. Stay out of this, boys. It’s just me and her. It’s a fight between Guardians.” Ono cracked his knuckles, standing to his full height.

A slight smile grew on Arisu’s lips, eager to get into this fun rumble. Ono was a karate black belt. He had gotten kicked out for picking too many fights. Just her sort. She rose and got into a fighting position with her bat.

Before it could come to blows, however, the unexpected happened. Lightning flashed, despite there not being a cloud anywhere. The air became heavy, like she’d climbed to the top of a mountain. The lightning flashed again, but Arisu blinked as she thought she saw creatures within the storm. Impossible! Monsters didn’t exist.

“What the hell was that?” Ono said, their fight forgotten. Everybody yelped in surprise as figures dropped from the sky, their appearance something from a nightmare. Human in appearance but with a bulbous body with sickly gray skin. Their faces resembled pigs, but oily tendrils wiggled free from their mouths, tasting the air. Each digit held a jagged spike, twice the size of her bat. They looked at the surprised teenagers with gleeful malevolence, licking their tentacles in hunger.

“Alright men, grab everyone you can.” The biggest said, towering twice over Ono’s already impressive height. “The king’s looking forward to a feast tonight, and we want the delectables ready for seasoning. Leave the women folk. I have something special planned for them.” This voice was oily, making one ill just listening to him. His chuckle was like metal scraping together.

“You sick ****!” Arisu kicked forward, hitting the leader right between the legs. The monster squealed in pain before toppling over. She didn’t stop kicking him in the royal jewels until her leg got tired. Arisu won’t allow these idiots to do as they please. While this city was a shithole, it was her shithole.

“Boss!” The monstrosities said, frightened by this sudden assault by a seemingly puny twelve-year-old girl.

“You want some too?” Arisu glared at the monsters, her bat ready for action. They backed away, their tentacles wiggling in distress.

“What’s going on here?” An unfamiliar voice said. Arisu watched in amazement as someone floated down from the air, flying like a bird without wings. Unlike his twisted buddies, this man looked human, though his long glam rock star hair was bright blue and neon-like. He wore leather, all black from head to toe. He glared at the humans with obvious disdain, pissing Arisu off royally.

“Lord Captain Vice!” The monsters said, tear sparking in their eyes in relief.

“Fools, you can’t handle a single girl?” Vice said. “I expect better from our elite of the elite. Succeed, or our lord will learn personally about this.”

This got the monsters’ attention, deciding that Arisu was a lesser danger than disappointing their leader. On trembling legs, the big guy rose to his menacing height.

“You got lucky, brat.” The big guy said, the pavement cracking as it failed to hold his weight. “Come on, boys. She can’t beat all of us.”

“Tsk, how annoying.” Arisu pulled her mask into position, ready to face the rushing horde of monstrosities. Dozens of tendrils lashed around her weapon arm, holding her baseball bat in place. The monsters showed impressive speed but yelped as they faced her fists instead.

“Die!” The big guy pulled a sword the size of a tree from his belt, lashing out at the distracted Arisu. Steel clashed as someone intercepted the blow.

“Ono. I didn’t ask for your help.” Arisu went back to back with him as they faced the monstrous horde together.

“You’re not the only one who wants to protect his shithole of a city.” Her guardian rival said. A monster squealed as the stupid tentacled face met fist, yellowish viscous blood oozed from it’s shattered nose. “To me, gang. Let’s show these freaks why they can’t mess with Tokyo!”

“Yeah!” The Ariake Junior thugs said, their voices rising to a fever pitch as they backed up their leader.

It was a rough bout as the delinquents gave as good as they got. Yellow blood pooled under their shoes as they pounded their foes into dust. Arisu received a nasty blow to the shoulder, definitely dislocating it. Crimson dripped into her eyes from multiple head wounds, the monster’s claws were sharp as knives. Ono was an ugly mess, his school uniform having several bloody slash wounds.

“You’re next!” Arisu said, standing on the fallen head monster’s face. She pointed her bat at the final monster, eager to learn if he also bled yellow.

“Like that, freak?” Ono cracked his knuckles. “I’m ready for round two.”

“Tsk.” The leader said, scowling as he lowered closer to earth. “I wasn’t expecting such heavy resistance. But your pretty act of defiance ends here,”

“Gah!” Arisu howled in pain as a gust of something shot from his extended hand. The force of a mini-cyclone tore their feet from the ground, sending them flying. Arisu screamed as she struck the pavement hard, skin scratched raw by the impact.

“And here’s where you die, pest.”

---

“This is bad!” Charity flitted about in distress, horrified by the damage the Slithcar Empire was causing to this helpless planet. Like many others, they planned to consume this planet whole before moving to their next victim. While the humans were fighting back, they fought an impossible battle. King Slithcar was beyond anything they could face. Even magical girls were powerless against his might.

But saving this planet wasn’t her mission. Starlight Dream had sent her to observe and analyze possible countermeasures. Magical girls were coming, but they’d likely arrive too late to save anyone.

“Gah!”

A scream of pain caught the fairy’s attention, watching in baffled astonishment as a young girl pounded the largest of Slithcar’s monsters, Captain Deathlok, to the ground, each debilitating blow striking between his legs. A preteen girl did this?

And the young, noble humans fought well, keeping their own against the monstrous horde. They fought with a courageous spirit, receiving a terrible beating, but fighting the monsters back.

“Bastards!” The young girl among them said, paying back a nasty gash across the forehead with a baseball bat into the Deathlok’s tentacled face. The creature babbled nonsense before getting knocked unconscious from a second, heavier blow.

Impressive. Was the girl part of some baseball club? It made sense. While else would the young girl randomly carry around a bat?

“Tsk,” Vice said, scowling as the rest of his monsters fell.

“Like that, freak?” The giant human said, crushing a tentacled monster with a foot. Other than some bloody gashes staining his school uniform, he seemed fine.

“And you’re next!” Much to Charity’s alarm, the girl pointed her bat at the airborne Lord Captain. Didn’t the girl realize just who’d she challenged? The monster lackeys were one thing, but Vice was on an entirely different level. He could level cities with a flick of a finger!

Before Charity could warn the poor humans, Vice lashed out. Light gathered within his hands, lashing out as a viper-like whip. Charity screamed in horror as an explosion of light blasted the young humans to the four winds, many getting blown into the water. The heat and force of the blast left them blackened and battered. It was over. In a single stroke, the Lord Captain had defeated them all.

“Bastard!” A pained voice said. The taller human weakly lifted a head, struggling to his feet. “Ikehara, you still alive?”

“Damn right.” The girl had also pushed herself to her feet despite her terrible wounds. Her mask slipped from her face, revealing a mouth that was smiling a wolfish grin. “Takes more than that to kill me! You hear that, you bastard!”

Vice remained unimpressed, glaring down at the still-defiant humans. This time, he’d ensure the humans wouldn’t defy him again. Charity couldn’t hold back anymore. While breaking protocol, she refused to allow these brave, noble humans to die.

“No!” Before Vice could strike another killing stroke, a small white figure drove into his chest at full force, blowing the wind from his lungs.

“Huh?” The humans watched the scene in evident confusion.

While the Lord Captain was still recovering. Charity flew towards the young, brave girl, taking a risk that likely wouldn’t work.

“Quick, grab my paw!” The fairy extended a paw.

“What? What the hell are you?” The girl asked, eyes wide.

“A friend. If we bond, Charity can give you the power to fight this monster.” Charity replied. It was a long shot. Only fairies that matched a human’s wavelength could bond, but it was this planet’s only chance.

“What the hell are you talking about?” The girl said, baffled. Charity noticed details she’d missed from high in the air. The girl had a rough demeanor with hard, scary eyes. She reeked of cigarette smoke, odd for a preteen. And her hands were rough, like someone who often got into fights. Wait, what had she gotten into?

“Fairy?” Vice said, eyes blazing with hatred. “So, Starlight Dream thinks they can save this world? Fool. Haven’t you already learned your lesson? Wasn’t the corpse of the last magical girl Master Slithcar sent you enough proof of the folly of opposing us?”

“What is it you hope to accomplish, little fairy?” The Lord Captain said, voice dripping with mocking contempt. “Like bonding with this fool girl would accomplish anything. You so-called protectors of the cosmos are impudent little children, trying to police an adult’s world they can’t begin to comprehend! Burn in hell with the last three magical girls.”

No! What had she been doing? Why had she broken protocol? She should have known it’d be pointless. She trembled as Vice gathered light into his palm, eager to extinguish her with a single blow. A gasp escaped Charity as something grabbed her paw.

“I don’t know what’s going on, but if you can give me the power to kick this guy’s arrogant ass, I’ll take it. Name’s Arisu Ikehara.”

“Charity.” She stared, awestruck, sensing something within her, bright and warm. Was this hope? They both gasped as a red-colored diamond-encrusted brooch dropped into Arisu’s hand.

“What’s this?” Arisu said, examining it.

“Hold up your brooch and yell, Change Change, Magical Love Dress Up.”

“What? That’s stupid.”

“Trust me.”

“Impossible,” Vice said, eyes widening in shock as he noticed the brooch in Charity’s new partner’s hand.

“Watch this. I’m about to kick your ass!” Much to Charity’s dismay, Arisu pulled out a cigarette and lit it. After taking a deep drag, she thrust her brooch skyward. “Change Change, Magical Love Dress Up!”

Blinding light filled the dockyard, warm and intense. Arisu stared at herself in astonishment as her school uniform changed, becoming a long frilly skirt. Five pinkish-white petals extended from it, both simple and elegant. Additional petals spouted from her chest, with her red brooch shining as a beacon of power.

“You did it! You’ve become a magical girl!” Charity whooped, flipping around in the air.

“Is that what I am?” Arisu examined her new costume with astonishment, pulling at her skirt.

“So what? You’re dead all the same,” Vice said, unimpressed.

“Wow.” The tall human watched this, eyes wide. “Arisu, you’ve become some kinda hero!”

“Guess so.” Arisu squatted down, cold eyes glaring at the Lord Captain. “Call me, Arisu Ikehara, the Wicked Queen!”

“Um, are you sure?” Charity cringed. What kind of magical girl moniker was that? She sounded like a villain. Whatever. She’d convince her partner to think of a better name later. “Extend your hand. You can summon your magical girl weapon!”

“Got it!” Arisu extended a hand, and a staff embedded with an apple-like jewel landed in it.

“Like some newbie magical girl can beat me. Try your best, little girl.” The smirk vanished off Vice’s face as the apple jewel embedded itself into his face, blood spurted everywhere.

“Take that, you bastard!”

“What are you doing?!” Charity said, alarmed. “That staff is meant for channeling magic, not brawling!”

“That sounds lame.” The Lord Captain’s whip cracked at her partner at impossible speed. But Arisu slipped past like the wind, hitting him in the chest. He coughed blood as ribs pierced his lungs. “This works way better!”

“You haven’t seen the last of me,” Vice said through pained gasps of air. “You only got lucky!” Before her partner could finish him, he teleported away.

“Tsk, coward. And it was just getting good.” Her partner released her transformation.

“That was incredible, Ikehara. You kicked ass!” The tall human said, rushing over. The other humans, which Charity realized were delinquents, ran over to give their congratulations.

“What has Charity gotten herself into?” She put her paws into her face. This was her life now? What would her friends say? Or Captain Izanami?!

“Hey, what are you so glum about?” Arisu said, putting a hand on Charity’s shoulder. “We kicked ass!”

Charity only sighed. “Nothing. Charity’s glad we fought them back for now.”

“What was that? It was like I could sense the danger before it happened.” Arisu said, looking at her brooch in amazement.

“That’s your power. Every magical girl possesses one. Charity thinks you must have some ability to sense future events.” That was a rare power. It’d serve them well in future battles against Slithcar’s forces.

“Why do you refer to yourself in the third person? It sounds stupid.”

“No, it doesn’t! It’s cute!” The nerve of this girl! Everyone laughed as the fairy fumed at her partner, inflaming her temper hotter. Unbeknownst to them, this random encounter would change the entirety of the cosmos forever.

---

I apologize to any real life schools used in this chapter. I'm sure you're very nice and aren't a delinquent ridden hellhole.

#anime #spells #magical girl #starlight dream #anime stories #humor #action #fantasy #fiction #starlightdream #stories #delinquents #alien invasion #alien invaders #battle #pompadour

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