#not vampires I know

[wanologic]

sorry danny, sam will never think you’re cool

[morganbritton132]

The funniest aspect of a child crime fighter is that sometimes they’re going to run into something that makes no sense because they don’t have the life experience. Because they’re nine.

Like Robin runs into a guy who works for The Penguin and the guy just throws his hands up like, “Don’t hit! I’m not an enforcer. I’m an accountant.”

Robin:

Robin, squaring up: I don’t know what that is.

[preciouslittle-bhaalbabe]

I need more of Astarion being an absolute undead fucking weirdo. No more suave charming elf man NO this man forgets to breathe for prolonged periods of time and randomly gasps or croaks because he can't speak without air in his lungs. He lurks in dark corners with weird reflective eyes and doesn't move until you notice him. He's SUPER into the scent of his lover and buries his face in their neck or chest while taking in a BIG snorf. He gets very affectionate when he notices his partner is on their period or is bleeding from other causes. He doesn't make noise when approaching someone and often scares the shit out of them because he just silently shows up behind them. He's addicted to the warmth of his partner and rubs his body against them like a cat. He makes animalistic grunts and moans while he feeds. He forgets to blink and just stares at people with wide eyes while they talk. He stares at his lovers pulse point instead of looking in their eyes. He growls when displeased. Sometimes he smiles just a tad too wide. He watches his lover sleep and waits for them to wake up for them to find him just staring them down, unblinking. He's a fucking freak and I love him to bits I need more weirdo Astarion.

[bruciemilf]

Need a the Waynes Lived AU where Martha’s a vampire. She snuck in a Wayne Gala for a potential late night snack, but Thomas thought she was a socialite.

“So, what do you do?”

“I drain people of their life sources.”

“Oh, you’re a CEO too?”

She can’t drink Thomas’ blood because he smokes too much, the baggy eyes indicate long nights spent on his feet during surgery, which means it’ll taste bitter, and she saw him drown 10 whiskey shots in one go.

It’s a taste thing, nothing against him.

He is, how ever, very handsome, and she decided she’ll be his house cat for the time being. Fast forward two years later and they have a vampire cherub of a baby named Bruce.

Babies usually don’t come out with fangs and tiny bat wings, so, yeah. His wife’s a vampire. Cool.

“How come I’ve never seen your wife outside during the daytime, Tom??”

“How come I’ve never seen you mind your own fucking business?”

[and-fishing-equipment]

imagine being real rashid and you work for these weird gay vampires and one day they come to you like hey rashid we're gonna give you a little holiday! armand will take over your duties for the time being, for a cool disguise during my interview, not a kink thing :) and you're like okay these are my weird gay vampire bosses so it probably is a kink thing but who am i to judge. and then you find out they are roleplaying this weird exhibitionist slash master/servant scene with your own real actual government name. fuck interview with the vampire, interview with rashid WHEN??

[paunchsalazar]

she’s with me

[daydreamycrustacean]

Loved by god

[oldwitchsleep]

this is the funniest fucking thing he could possibly fucking say about lestat

[what-am-i-doing-in-this-fandom]

the werewolf stan is amazing btw thank you

No, thank you!!! In fact, here's more just because you sent this ask (and probably the other one too, I love you)!!!!! More!!!!!!!!

They are liars <3

Part one is here!! ;P

Part three is here!! 'cause I can't control myself 😔

[vamphours]

listen i know i haven't posted anything in like three years but here's some iwtv fanart<3

edit: prints of this can be found here!

[stevenrogered]

Sam Reid: I ate so many of those photos. They were made of rice paper, so they stuck to the roof of my mouth. There were a few where I just shoved the whole photo into my mouth, but that didn’t work, so I had to eat it. It was like eating a sweet cake. They were stuck to the roof of my mouth and I couldn’t keep talking.

They’re saying mean things about Louis’ photos, so he’s going, “Fuck you! You took a beautiful photograph. Don’t listen to that guy. I’ll eat it.”

Jacob Anderson: I loved it so much.

[blessyouhawkeye]

can't stop thinking about daniel's daughters in all of this. imagine you're kind of estranged from your dad who always put his career before you, and you find out that in the middle of a global pandemic your father with parkinson's flew to dubai for a story. you're like yeah, par for the course, seems like something he'd do. but then he comes back from dubai without parkinson's, a different eye colour, and the weirdest set of acrylics you've ever seen in your life. cut to months later and he's now promoting his best selling novel in which he claims (and adamantly believes) that he flew to dubai to interview vampires, which are real and walk among us. you're now starting to think that somehow he traded his parkinson's for full blown dementia. and he's still wearing those fucking acrylics.

[itstweeds]

Reminiscing (Louis look was 100% inspired by Jacob's look as Scipio in Timestalker)

[lazylittledragon]

domesticating your vampire: a memoir

(beautiful high res version on patre0n)

[ayo-edebiri]

#Give me more of this energy next season please

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE (2022 - ) I 2.02 - After the Phantoms of Your Former Self