#not too far at first since he was still getting used to having. like. a working body

[01zfan]

never thought | l. at & s. es

boyfriend!anton x reader | 5.3k words

completely normal after the tonseok gym pics :D this is also just like pure filth LMFAO i apologize in advance.

contains: anton and his girlfriend are exhibitionists by accident, eunseok is a voyeur by accident, semi-public sex, dom/sub dynamics

Eunseok didn’t know that Anton had it in him.

Eunseok knew that Anton had a crush on you and he knew that you reciprocated it. He knew that Anton asked you to hang out all those months ago, and you guys have been dating ever since. 

He also knew that Anton’s reserved nature was often brought up in their workout group. During the first post-workout locker room talk, Anton's gaze stayed locked on the tile floor of the bathroom. A towel draped over his wet shoulders and tightly wrapped around his waist while everyone else couldn't be bothered to cover up. The other boys walked around the area freely, more concerned with using their towels to dry their hair rather than remaining decent. No one noticed that Anton was trying so hard to conceal himself until Sungchan pointed out the red tips of his ears and his hands securely holding the wrap in his towel.

The group only took pity on Anton and moved on after the red spread across his entire body, but ever since then his shyness became a topic of discussion. Everyone found it endearing how Anton would shake his head and stay seated on the bench while everyone else roamed freely in the area. Eunseok paid close attention to how Anton would wait until no one else was around to change into his clothes, or how he would omit the showers all together. Eunseok noticed that if Anton left while everyone was showering that was his indirect way of saying the previous locker room talk went too far. If they brought you up, even in passing, Anton would without fail leave early the next gym session. Eunseok realized that the shrugging in his shoulders was Anton feigning indifference, and his head shake was a silent warning to not push the topic any further.

Eunseok made the mistake of assuming Anton's avoidance in talking about you was due to insecurity or shame. How could he talk about you in the locker room if there was nothing to say. What was Anton hiding, what was he lacking that made him so wary to bring you up?

Anton's non-confrontational attitude didn't help his case. If he didn't say what was bothering him they would not stop bringing it up. Eunseok and Anton’s shared friends would often tease him, chiding about his sweaty palms and the splotchy blushing mess his cheeks became at the drop of a hat. Anton’s tendency to trip over his words and his clumsiness when navigating small spaces made everyone think he was just one blunder after another. Anton did nothing to dispute this, he could get mad all he wanted but he could not deny fact. He would only sit on the bench in the locker room, eyes not focusing on anything as he shook his head and laughed to himself.

As time went on, and Anton started gaining muscle mass faster than everyone else in the group, he became extremely tightlipped when it came to you. He was still the same shy guy, batting off the teasing with a smile and a head shake, sometimes even a sly comment back that would illicit laughter. But if it was you, Anton became pointed looks and a side smile that showed annoyance. Everyone picked up on what Eunseok already knew and they credited it to jealousy too. Eunseok ended up considering a hint of possessiveness that rested underneath Anton’s compliant nature. Anton's refusal to talk about you made Eunseok believe that it was humiliating for Anton to bring up. He believed he was too afraid to admit he was the same submissive person with you like he was with his friends. 

Eunseok admittedly spent too much time thinking about the dynamics of your relationship with Anton. But in his defense, It's hard to not speculate when so much is left to the imagination. Anton's refusal to indulge his friends left so much up in the air. When Wonbin asked if you and Anton had done it and Anton's eyes got so wide they almost popped out of his head, everyone made their own assumptions. Sungchan believed you and Anton had done way more than the crew could even comprehend. Wonbin guessed that you two were waiting for marriage.

Eunseok knew it was wrong to think about it, to imagine what his friend was doing with his girlfriend in their moments alone. But he couldn’t help it. Everyone in their workout group made shots in the dark about the relationship, some were just doing it more than others. Eunseok would take the crown of being the most curious, but he just couldn’t see it, he couldn’t believe it. He had to run over the anatomy of your relationship anytime he saw you two together in an effort to make sense of it. He ended up making a shot in the dark just like his friends a long time ago. He convinced himself that you had to be the one who took the initiative, that you were the one that bossed Anton around. You were the one that coaxed him out of his shell, teaching him what you liked and didn’t like. 

His assumptions were backed with evidence. Even when you weren’t around, Anton spoke about you with devotion. Every word of yours was religion, you were name dropped in every conversation. Well she said was his favorite phrase. He bought you things he thought you’d like, stuffed in his cart before he ever thought of getting something for himself. His behavior was only worse when you were around. Anton hung to your every word. He was close to you like a shadow, holding your bags without a second thought. He slid his card into your wallet for safe keeping, took off his jacket to keep you warm before you even had the chance to be cold. He complimented you shyly each time like it was the first. You were his lockscreen and homescreen, you were his everything. Anton just always seemed so grateful, so desperate to please you. 

Eunseok believed it was natural for Anton to take such a submissive role for you in public because it was the same in the bedroom. Once he deluded himself into believing that was fact, Eunseok tried to figure out what made his friend that way and what made him avoid the topic of you two. What did you do to Anton that had him worshipping the ground you stepped on? What tricks did you do, what new world did you show him. He could only imagine what it was that had Anton so helplessly sprung. 

Laying alone in his bed at night was the only time Eunseok granted himself to think about it in depth. One hand underneath the covers while the other held his phone in landscape mode, ears straining to waiting for an insight on your relationship to leak through his headphones. 

When his vision on the video started becoming shaky and the sound through the wired headphones fell out, Eunseok started seeing it clearly. Instead of the videos found in the incognito, his mind would be replaced with visions of Anton and you. Your hands expertly on your clit while Anton silently watched the pattern. Your other hand feeling your chest, putting on a show for Anton watching your every move. Your two slender fingers being replaced with his thicker ones. Anton's unsteady and unsure movements while you swiveled your hips to make up for what he was lacking. Anton looking up to you with his big brown eyes, silently waiting for your approval. His untouched dick twitching and leaking in his pants when you’d give him a breathy just like that or a shaky affirming head nod. You guiding his hands to your body, showing him how to tease and pinch your skin just right. 

Eunseok imagined Anton going red all the way up to his ears each time he'd take his pants off. Every time without fail, as if it was your first time seeing him naked. He imagined Anton being a shaking mess when you guided his back to the bed, gently pressing on his wide shoulders. Eunseok could almost see Anton squeeze his eyes shut right before you would sink your body down on his.

He imagined Anton clenching his bedsheets desperately as you cooed at him and encouraging him to hold on. Assuring your boyfriend that you were almost there, you just needed a little more. Anton at the brink of tears telling you how badly he needed to cum. His words being cut off mid sentence as his orgasm took him completely by surprise. 

Eunseok always assumed Anton would be out of breath, out of energy after the first round. If Anton’s stamina in the gym was any indication of that he was sure his friend would want to tap out after one round. He could hear Anton's apologies, and then the tears finally spilling when you’d start grinding on him again. He'd cringe at the wet and lewd sound of him inside of you but strain to hear it all. Just one more you’d say in a demanding voice. Anton biting his lip red and swollen trying to hold back the pitiful sounds. Him apologizing more after the second wave a pleasure started kicking in and before he started speaking incoherently. Shaking his head trying to regain his composure before he’d repeat the same mistake again.

Eunseok could admit that his mind had the tendency to wander, but he had to fill in the gaps somehow. In his bedroom and his mind, where he made the rules, he had the complexities of your relationship figured out.

But as Eunseok pressed his head to the crack in the door he bared witness to the truth and everything else crumbled. 

There were instances of Eunseok seeing the dynamics you and Anton exhibited now. There was your birthday party, when Anton held your chin playfully in one hand while the other brought a frosting covered finger to your face. Eunseok remembers seeing your eyes flash and your lips parting obediently as if from muscle memory. He remembers seeing Anton’s eyes cut down to stare at your lips and him getting that same slick smile when he knew something others didn't. For a moment—before you two realized you were in the corner of the kitchen instead of the privacy of your bedroom—you looked so pliant, so willing. Eunseok saw both of you come back to the present in real time, his friends grip on your chin went back to being playful before he smeared the white frost across the apple of your cheek at the last second. 

There was that time Eunseok walked in on you two cramped together on the tiny loveseat in the common area. It was late at night then, a show neither of you were watching played on the television as you straddled Antons’ lap. Anton was consuming then, even in the dark living room Eunseok could make that out clearly. His hand on your waist pulled your frame against his, his hand clasped on the back of your neck guided you the exact way he wanted you to. You two didn’t notice Eunseok standing there then. The two of you were so caught up in eachother that you couldn’t spare anything else to look to the side. Eunseok ended up tiptoeing back to his room, closing his door shut softly just to open it up again loudly. When he reentered the living room you were suddenly on the other side of the couch, your chest heaving as Anton pretended to look at his phone relaxed and even. You were the only one that spoke to Eunseok, smiling at him sweetly like there wasn’t lipstick smudged across your lips. 

Even if Eunseok had seen Anton assert some sort of authority or dominance, it was always fleeting. Everything would happen so quick Eunseok would barely be able to catch it. Smaller moments like Anton gently pulling you the way he wanted to go, his hand resting on the back of your neck before he’d squeeze just to smile at you tensing up—things like this were gone in the blink of an eye. What Eunseok saw most of was his friend being hopelessly in love with you, smiling and blushing profusely when you called him Tonie in a sickly sweet voice.

Hearing the nickname fall from your lips was what brought Eunseok back to the present.

“Tonie” You repeated the nickname the same time Eunseok shifted closer to the crack in the door. “Too much.” You said weakly.

Eunseok was on his knees, shifting from side to side to get the view of you two through the small opening. One of his hands was planted on the ground, the same way your two feet were planted to the ground in front of the inclined workout bench. Eunseok’s other hand dared to push at the weighted door, opening it up.

“What? It's too big for you?” Anton teases.

Eunseok swears he’s not hearing things right. Anton’s tone is too condescending for this to be real. Anton was supposed to be whiny, unsure of himself, and he was supposed to be the one being asked embarrassing questions. Explicit words said with a light sneer shouldn't roll off his tongue so easily.

He shouldn't be the one that licks his lips when you whine in response before purposefully fucking you harder. You’re supposed to be the one with the cards in your hands. The only job Eunseok sees you have is the responsibility of taking all of Anton, over and over again as he pulls your body back on his.

“Too big.” You answer quickly.

You clench your hand around nothing the same time your words are cut off by a sharp thrust. Eunseok can’t believe it.

“Just a little more, baby.” Anton was seated against the incline of the bench, both hands holding your upper arms as he guided you backwards to meet his hips. He was preoccupied talking to you, instead looking at the lines of your back jerk from the movements. “Doing so good for me.” He sighed.

His voice is alot more relaxed than yours is. Each time he brings you back by the hold he has on your arms he grunts, but he is faring much better than you. You’re a mess, so different from the collected girl Anton gets shy even looking at. Eunseok can clearly see your teary eyes, your bitten lips, and how you don't care your body is spilling from your tight shirt. 

Eunseok didn’t know Anton had it in him. He didn’t know this side of you existed. He is overwhelmed by the sight, so confused by the body Anton spent so much time hiding and not talking about. Eunseok is ashamed to admit that the scene in front of him is enticing. He watches you two in your natural habitat, how you behave when no one is watching. In the small private gym it is just the two of you, falling into your separate roles to chase after the same feeling.

“Always so wet for me.” Anton says it like a fact. 

He looks away from where you too meet to look at the back of your head. Eunseok sees an almost evil smile on Anton’s face when you nod your head, trying so hard to form a coherent thought as he readjusts the hold he has on your arms.

“Feels so good.” You stammer.

Eunseok doesn’t know how long you two have been doing this. He’s never at the gym during Anton’s day of the week with you. He only swung by because he left something the day prior, he followed the sounds from his locker to here, sitting in the dark hallway of private exercise rooms watching you try to drive your hips backwards to meet Anton.

"What if I stopped?" Anton asks playfully.

“Please don’t stop.” Your tone is pathetically serious, almost pleading as you try and look back to see Anton's face.

As if you weren’t struggling enough, he takes his hands off of your arms. Without his strength your lack of energy is obvious. Eunseok can see your feet slide forward from your loss of stability, the way you helplessly whine from the loss as you try to find your footing on the wooden floor. Eunseok has to catch his breath with you, matching your deep inhales of air with quiet ones. 

Eunseok has never seen you so weak. He always imagined Anton would be the one whining as he tried to gather his energy, that it would be Anton to silently ask for help. Eunseok would’ve never thought it’d be you who ended up being a shaking mess after only bouncing your hips twice.

Eunseok thought it’d be you in Anton's place. Unaffected, hands behind your head as you admired the sight in front of you. But it’s Anton who is unabashedly dragging his eyes down your back and running his hands through his hair without a care in the world.

“Keep going.” Anton murmurs.

His tone is quiet but firm. Eunseok thinks it’s the first time he’s seen Anton boss anyone around, but you listen so quickly. You dig your nails into Anton’s hard thighs for extra leverage. Eunseok sees the muscles in your arm strain underneath your skin as you raise and lower yourself on his dick again.

“There you go.” Anton praises.

Anton leans forward to kiss your sweaty shoulder blade. His lips are right over the strap of your tank top, the one that does nothing to hide your body now. He has to readjust the front of your shirt to conceal your chest again, he has to pull down the bottom to cover your soft stomach, and pull up the other strap until it rests on your shoulder again. He pats your covered skin when you're decent again, only for it all to get ruined as you continue to ride him recklessly. In seconds your tight shirt rides up your stomach again and your chest spills from the top. He only laughs at the sight, and your bounces suddenly switch to another unstable attempt at a rhythm.

“You're struggling, baby?” Anton asks and the smile on his face only gets bigger.

Eunseok can’t stop his eyes from widening at how easily the teasing falls from Anton’s lips. His jaw drops to the floor when he sees you quickly shake your head in response.

"I got it." You lie.

Anton only hums in response, experimentally pressing his hand between your shoulder blades. Eunseok watches him apply the smallest bit of force, just to see your weak body yield to him. Anton hums again, his gaze going from the space his hand occupies to the back of your head.

“Feels good right?” He asks.

You nod your head even faster, dropping yourself on Anton’s dick so fast the sound of your ass slapping against his lap fills the room.

“So good.” You hum in response.

When Anton takes his hands away from you completely, that’s when Eunseok finally lets his hand go to his own body. As if Anton is bossing him around too, Eunseok moves the same way you do. When you tilt your head to the side so Anton can press his teeth into your neck Eunseok tips his too. When you lean back Eunseok does the same. He sits on his knees, resting back on his haunches as he palms himself over his gray sweatpants.

“Fuck.” Anton breathes to himself.

His hands are clasped behind his head watching you do all the work. The effort from before shows on his skin. Eunseok sees the sweat and the splotches of blush that paints Anton’s body and face. He can see the sweat forming on his brow and chest that makes his black compression shirt cling to him even more.

Even now, without touching you, Anton slightly flicks his hips upwards to meet you each time you come down. But he is lax, watching your body move from the force of your drops.

“Keep riding me, princess.” Anton says softly.

When your response is a little too loud, Eunseok bites his lip. His dick twitches against his palm when Anton leans forward to grip your chin in one hand. He doesn’t even have to pry his fingers between your jaw to get your lips to part. Just like on your birthday you do it mindlessly, a string of spit webbing between your drool covered lips. Just like you two seemingly wished to do on your birthday Anton brings his fingers to your mouth and presses them heavily on your tongue. Eunseok watches your lips close around him immediately, hallowing your cheeks and swirling your tongue around. Anton fucks your mouth with his two fingers, pushing deep almost causing you to gag, before pulling back.

“So good at listening to me.” Anton says.

Eunseok thinks he’s about to explode. His hand pressing against his bulge isn’t enough. Looking at you two through a crack in the door and from the reflections of the room wide mirrors isn’t enough.

“You listen to me so well.” Anton comes closer and wraps his hand that isn’t in your mouth around your waist. “If only everyone knew.” He teases.

For the first time, Eunseok watches you be defiant. Even as you continue bouncing on his lap through the burning pain in your legs, even as spit dribbles down your chin due to an overworked gag reflex, even as you let yourself be consumed by Anton’s frame. You shake your head somehow speeding up the way you drop down onto him.

“It’s a secret.” You gargle behind his now three fingers.

Eunseok’s hand wraps around his dick inside of his sweats when he sees Anton lick his lips before fake pouting. 

“Oh I know.” Anton voice drips with fake sympathy. “Our little secret.” He promises.

Eunseok feels the hairs raise on the back of his neck when Anton runs his hands over the planes of your shoulder. Eunseok watches you pause on his lap and he gets even closer to the crack in the door. His dick is twitching in his hand, precum wets his tip and in between his fingers.

Anton is out of his view when he moves his body. Eunseok scoots closer to the opening, swaying his head from side to side trying to find the angle to give his eyes the widest view.

When he gets too close, just when he finds his spot, Eunseok sees that Anton is looking at him. Narrowed eyes and a furrowed brow peaking in the darkness of the hallway Eunseok is crouched in. 

Fear shoots up his spine. Eunseok’s hand completely stills its tugging movements. He pulls in a breath so quiet and so deep that his vision spots. Anton looks directly at him. Eunseok can see Anton looking right at him, but Anton doesn’t move. He only cranes his head and narrows his eyes further trying to find someone in the shadows. Eunseok freezes like a deer in the headlights.

“Tonie.” You whimper.

Your undistracted voice makes Eunseok’s hand continue to move, even while Anton stares directly through him. Anton is still looking for something, prying eyes trying to find a presence he can feel but can’t see. 

“Tonie.” When you drag out his name, Anton goes back to you. With one last side glance at the hallway he lets his fingers slide from your mouth. “I’m so close again.” You whine.

“We gotta be fast.” Anton orders gently. 

You nod, bringing one of your hands to quickly wipe across your face. You get the spit, smeared chapstick, and tears in one go, bringing in a sniffle before you plant your hands on his thighs again. 

But when you are prepared to continue bouncing on his lap until you make even more pitiful and even louder noises, Anton has other plans. Eunseok can see it in the way he wraps both hands around your waist, he sees it as someone looking in before you can even notice. 

At the drop of a hat Anton flips you around, where you’re the one with the side of your face pressed against the incline of the bench while he mounts you from behind. You’re in a haze, completely pliant to Anton’s impatient hand that guides one of your knees to rest on the edge of the bench to open you up wider so he can slot himself between your legs. 

The change in position and balance causes you to helplessly grip the head of the bench to find stability. Once again Eunseok can no longer see Anton’s face, but he imagines he’s looking down at where your hole clenches around nothing. He sees Anton rest one of his feet on the low cushioned bar for leg curls to get an optimum angle. Eunseok can see everything this way, the way your ass wiggles towards Anton’s dick and the glisten that goes down your thigh. Eunseok can see your cheek smushed against the incline of the bench, how it causes your lips to pout and pucker. 

Eunseok can see it all, except for Anton. When he watches Anton’s hand wrap around his dick he moves in the tiny space of the hallway again. 

But this time, when Eunseok can see everything, he sees Anton staring straight at him. He’s not staring into the darkness, he’s not looking at what he thinks is a person. The way Anton's eyes widen in shock and the red deepens on his neck tells Eunseok everything he needs to know. His hand stops in his pants, even when his dick continues to pulse in his grasp. Anton freezes too. 

Eunseok and Anton both refuse to look away until you lift your heavy head from the incline. Eunseok watches you turn, completely ignoring the Eunseok shaped shadow in the crack of the door to look at your boyfriend with pleading eyes.

“Tonie, please.” Your hand blindly reaches behind you in an effort to guide Anton’s dick the rest of the way. “Don’t tease me.” You beg.

Anton can barely pull himself away from Eunseok slowly continuing to tug at himself again to look at you. He leans forward, pressing his shirt clad chest to your back to kiss your cheek. He moves his hips out of the way, making your hand hover in space, looking for something Anton purposefully moved out of reach. When you whine again he smiles against the apple of your cheek.

“Not teasing you, babe.” He says.

“Yes you are.” You pout, and Eunseok can almost hear the beginning of a cry in your voice.

When you close your eyes to preen your head towards Anton’s lips, he casts another glance to Eunseok. His confused state turns to a jealous one when he realizes Eunseok hasn’t stopped his ministrations on himself. Anton purposefully obstructs Eunseok’s view, wedging his body between your ass and Eunseok’s line of sight. He perches his foot on the leg curl bar again, and casts one more look to Eunseok. The look Anton gives Eunseok shatters everything. The upturn in his lips, the amusement in knowing what Eunseok is doing on the other end of the door, the way he hides you from Eunseok’s view. 

It’s a quick look, one that disappears fast like all the other cracks Eunseok has seen in Anton’s resolve. Quickly he is sucked back into the moment and you, his head tilts back from the relief the same time he brings a hand down on the swell of your ass that Eunseok can’t see.

When Eunseok can no longer handle the view of Anton’s rippling muscles underneath his compression shirt he looks down to himself instead. He’s so close, on the same cusp of insanity that you’re on. Anton knows it, Eunseok knows he does. His hands wrap around your waist to bring your hips back quickly. He fucks you with a fervor that shakes the weight stand your other hand clings to.

“Squeezing me so tight.” Anton leans forward to clasp his hand over yours. Eunseok can’t see a single part of you as Anton uses his body to cover you completely. He speaks loud enough for Eunseok to hear, the lewd sounds you make leaks into the hallway after bouncing off the mirrored walls. “Doing that on purpose?” He asks.

You don’t even speak anymore. Only pitched moans are pulled from the back of your throat. You were always the talker between the two of you. Anton nodding along to every word you say. Now he is the one filling in the gaps of silence, pinching your cheek playfully when he realizes you have nothing to say.

“Must feel really good, huh?” He teases.

Eunseok doesn’t blame you for the pathetic yeah that escapes your lips almost instantly. His hand speeds up in his sweats, the fabric jumps as the metal equipment shakes around you two.

“Are you gonna cum?” Anton asks.

Eunseok paints his hand and the inside of his pants before you can answer. His orgasm takes him so suddenly his pitches forward, his hand presses into the wall as he looks down at the ground in front of him. He sees his thighs twitch as his whole body contracts. Eunseok’s sweaty hair cascades and blocks his vision as his hips start rutting into his hand. He fucks his hand like a hormonal teenager while Anton commands you to cum around him. His words drown out the tiny sound that slips past Eunseok’s bitten lips. 

When Eunseok looks up from the ground, he can see Anton give you one final thrust before he pulls out completely. Anton pumps his dick quickly as you come down from the same high Eunseok just experienced. He watches Anton reach down quickly into his bag before he finally releases. The amount of control and precision Anton makes Eunseok realize he is wearing the mess he made, that there is already an obvious stain forming right in the front. 

Anton is tidy, his mess is clean before you even catch your breath. You’re weak and spent, back against the incline of the bench as you look up to Anton looking down at you. Your weak hand pinches and prods at his thick thighs, the other grazes over his taut lower stomach. You can’t bring yourself to widen your sleepy eyes, you can barely stifle a yawn as you lean further into the bench.

One second Anton is solid underneath you, the next he is soft and giggling. You can only give him a weak smile as you continue touching him. As if a switch had been flipped you’re no longer feeling him up but tickling him. He playfully grabs your hands, both wrists contain in your hand as he wipes away the tears collected at your waterline. 

Eunseok is bewildered to see the bright smile on Anton’s lips. He’s no longer eating you alive but putting you back together, guiding your legs into an extra pair of sweats he had stuffed in his gym bag. Anton tends to you before he even thinks about tending to himself, kissing your cheeks sweetly in between each action.

You’re still collecting yourself when Anton is ready to go. He has to pull you up from the bench with both hands, he has to offer to carry you before you shake your head and lament you can walk. 

Eunseok sneaked off long before Anton opened the door for you the rest of the way and let you stagger through first. He was out of the parking lot before Anton buckled you into the passenger seat. He was home laying in bed by the time Anton started running a warm shower for you.

Eunseok absolutely didn’t know Anton had it in him.

[l1tw1ck]

The Ferret and the Fox

Bottom!FTM!Omega!Ferret Draco x Top!AMAB!Alpha!Fox Reader

🪄 Word Count: 3k 🪄

Draco's suppressants decide to stop working in the middle of a lecture, forcing him to leave and rest in your office. Draco wasn't thinking straight when he willingly entered an alpha's territory and inadvertently tied himself to you permanently

AFAB Language Used | Hogwarts University AU | Event Request

CW: Non-Con, Brief Somnophilia, Teacher/Student (Draco is 20) Heat, Virginity Loss, Victim Blaming, Marking, Creampie, Fingering, Manipulation, Knotting

As you're teaching your class, you and the rest of your students begin to smell someone’s pheromones. Everyone seems to be looking at Draco Malfoy, who's very red. He must be in heat. You walk over to him and lean in close to him. “Malfoy, are you alright?” 

‎ 

He jumps in surprise. He looks up at you with an adorable expression. His tail is curled up on his lap. “It looks like your heat started,” You speak to him softly. “Why don't you go rest in my office until class is over?” You should tell him to see the nurse but she's so far and he’d be safe from all the other alphas. And you might get a chance with him. Draco nods gently. You help him pack up his stuff and walk him to your office, not trusting anyone to let him go by himself.

‎ 

He sits down on the couch and takes off his coat to drape it over himself. You give him the blanket you often use during your free time to nap. “I’ll lock the door so no one can come in. If you get hungry or thirsty, you can use my water bottle and take whatever you like from my mini fridge.”

‎ 

“Okay…” He turns away from you. “Thanks.”  

‎ 

You could barely hear him but you could tell what he said based on how embarrassed he seemed. You smile and leave the room. As soon as you do so, Draco kicks off his shoes and socks before properly laying down. It doesn't take long for him to fall asleep with his and your scent mixed together to comfort him. He won't say it out loud but you're his favorite teacher and the only person in Hogwarts that he truly feels safe around and trusts. While he doesn't have any romantic feelings for you, your scent is still very comforting.

‎ 

‎ 

You walk into your office now that class is over. Since you don't have any more classes to teach today, you plan on taking him home. Most students take suppressants during the school year but when a student isn't able to do so for whatever reason, they take time off to go home since it’d be dangerous to be in their dorms. Draco shouldn't have any problems with taking suppressants but something obviously went wrong. You look at him sleeping on the couch, some of his clothes on the floor. You do a double take when you realize that he's only wearing underwear and his dress shirt. His clothes are conveniently placed in a way that allows you to see his light colored underwear soaked with slick, along with a small pool of it on the couch. You’ll never get over seeing an omega in heat. 

It doesn't help that the room is completely filled with his scent. You should resist and take him home but he looks too tempting. All of the alpha teachers are able to control themselves when met with the strong smell of an omega but there's something different about Draco. Or, really, something different about you.

You're willingly giving in to your instincts this time. You could go and do the right thing but you don't want to and you never really planned to in the first place. You’ve been attracted to Draco since he started your class this year. You never thought you’d have the opportunity to fuck him and now that you do, you're not going to give it up. You unbuckle your belt and free your hard cock, leaving your pants on to make the clean up easier.

You move onto the couch and stare at Draco’s sleeping face with a small smile. You feel sort of bad doing this while he's asleep but it's not like you’ll be taking his virginity. He’s 20, he must've had his first and many others by now. Right? Who wouldn't want him? If you ignore his personality, he's irresistible. You shrug off your uncertainty and take off his underwear. You bring it to your face and smell it, your cock aching for him. You move it away and focus on the real thing.

Draco makes a cute noise in his sleep, his fluffy ears twitching. He's just too adorable. You look at his soaked pussy in awe and run your finger up it, causing him to shiver. You bring your finger to your lips and taste his slick. As you thought, he tastes amazing. His tail curls up in response to your touch. 

You bite your bottom lip as you slowly inch your cock inside him. He’s tight but very slippery, it's not too hard to penetrate him. You moan at the feeling of being inside him. Nothing can compare to his pussy. You grin as an outline of your cock starts to appear on his stomach. You begin to slowly fuck into him. “God, you feel so good, baby.” 

Draco moans. His eyes flutter open. “Huh..?” He blinks a few more times. “Stop! What are you doing?!” He feels like crying. You're so big, it hurts like hell.

“Shh, this is your fault, Malfoy. You shouldn't have let me keep you here. Your pheromones are all over the room, you practically forced me to fuck you.”

“No…I…”

“Isn't this better than having some random person fuck you? Or do you have a boyfriend?”

Draco shakes his head, tears rapidly falling down his cheeks. “This…this is my first time!”

You pause. You’ve never seen him cry before, it's hot. “Really?” You feel your heart pounding. “That's okay, I’ll take care of you from now on.” You resume your gentle thrusts.

Draco sobs. “Why…?”

“If you didn't want this to happen, you shouldn't have let me bring you here. You don't understand how tempting you looked when I saw you sleeping.” You brush his hair out of his face. “You looked so sexy ruining my couch with your slick.”

He looks really embarrassed. Your pheromones seem to be calming him down though. Plus being in heat is really helping to sedate him.

“So just relax, okay? You deserve this.”

Draco nods teary eyed. You hold onto his waist and start to fuck him at a rough pace. He squeals and moans in pleasure, face red from embarrassment. “That’s a good boy, taking me so well.” You purr. You lean into his ear. “Love your pussy so fucking much, sweetheart.” You trail down to his neck and lightly suck on his skin.

He squeaks. “Ah…[Name]~ I’m sorry..”

You pause for a brief moment then slow down. You're shocked that he apologized. Despite the major changes he went through in the past, he's still prideful. He's really different when he's in heat. “If you're sorry then let me mark you. Now that I’ve had a taste of you, it’d be cruel to not let me have you. Besides, I should also take responsibility.”

Draco sniffles. You should feel bad for taking advantage of his current state but you just can't. He's too cute for you to let go. “Okay..” He closes his eyes and moves his head to show you his neck. 

You sink your teeth into his skin, immediately causing him to come. You lick up his blood and thrust harder. “You won't have to worry about anything from now on, sweetheart.” You come inside of him.

────────────────── 

Draco wakes up in an unfamiliar room with aches all over his body. He remembers going into heat during class…then going into your office…

Draco brings his hand to his mouth in shock. Tears run down his cheeks as he slowly begins to remember everything. He was waiting to fall in love and now he's stuck with you.

“You're finally up.” You walk into the room, holding a hot cup of tea. “I made you lemon ginger, it’ll make you feel a bit better. Oh, I also gave you some medicine for your heat. You should be okay now, at least mentally.”

He looks at you scornfully. His eyes are watery and puffy. He doesn't understand how much that's turning you on. He takes the tea despite his anger.

“You’re angry, aren't you?” You ask, sitting down at the edge of the bed. “Why didn't you take your suppressants?”

“I– I did take them!” He shouts. “I don't know what happened!”

“Shh, it's okay, sweetheart.” You rub his thigh. “Sometimes, suppressants stop working. It's rare but you’ll have to change to a different medication.”

“Don't…please don't touch me.” He's shaking very badly.

“We’re bonded now, Draco. You remember, right?”

He sniffles. “Why…”

“You know why. You let that happen to yourself. I’m sure you were conscious enough to know why you shouldn't have done that.”

“I trusted you..”

“That was a mistake. You shouldn't trust an alpha to take care of an omega in heat. In any other circumstance, I wouldn't have done anything to you, but you willingly came into my office and filled it with your scent.” You take the tea from him and place it onto the nightstand, he's shaking so much you're worried he’ll spill it and burn himself. “You know alphas have a hard time resisting.”

Draco begins to cry again. He’s whimpering and trying hard not to choke on his own tears.

“It's okay. I’ll take care of you from now on. Anything you want, I’ll do it.” You caress his cheek, pushing his hair away from his face. He begins to sob vocally, letting out visceral cries of pain. “It’ll be okay, Draco.”

You let him cry for a while and urge him to drink some tea in between. He eventually calms down.

“What will I tell my mother?” He sighs, refusing to look at you.

“Don't worry about her. I’ll make sure she won't say anything, even if you move in.”

“Wh- move in?”

“If you want to. Since you're in the university now, it won't be an issue to move out and commute from here.”

“The school wouldn't allow me to live with you.”

“You're an adult, Draco. As long as we spin the story around a bit, they’ll even insist that we live together.” You smile. “We could say you came onto me and forced me to mark you. It’s not too far from the truth.”

He frowns. He doesn't know how to feel. He finally looks at you. His cheeks redden when he notices your boner. “You- have you been hard this entire time?!”

You chuckle. “Maybe. You're just so cute when you cry.”

He looks down at his hands. “...I don’t remember what it felt like..”

“You don't?”

“It just…I know that it hurt but…”

“Do you want me to show you?”

He nods softly. “I have to be with you from now on…” He's still a little affected by his heat.

“Alright.”

Draco looks up at you timidly, his ears folded down. He’s only wearing boxers now. Your tail is swishing from side to side.

“I’ve always liked you, you know?” You happily run your hands down his body. “You're just so pretty. When I saw you walk into my class…I couldn't stop thinking about you.”

Is that why you were so kind to him?

“You always kept to yourself…it made me want to take care of you. So when I smelled your scent…I was overwhelmed.” You bring one of your hands down to his underwear. “I should've tried harder to resist but you made it so difficult.”

He whimpers at the feeling of your fingers sliding up his clothed cunt. “So….you really…hnh-”

“I love you, Draco.” 

He blushes. Even though he didn't choose you, you're the kind of person he was looking for. Someone who would love and take care of him. You smile as you notice the change in his demeanor. He's opening up to you.

“When you graduate, you won't have to worry about getting a job. You can just stay home and do whatever you like.” You remove his underwear. “You won't have to worry about anything.”

“Do…do I have to graduate?” He asks, looking at you solemnly. He's sick of Hogwarts. Even after everything that's happened, he doesn't have a single friend. Nobody trusts him or even tries to pretend they like him. Not even Harry and his friends really talk to him, they're too busy. If he doesn't have to get a job, why even bother going to that miserable place? Hogwarts used to feel more like home but after losing his friends and becoming isolated, it feels like a prison.

“Well..” You smile. “That’d make things easier.” You remove your shirt.

“I can stay here..” He feels dizzy from your scent. He triggered your alpha instincts and now you can't stop yourself from drowning him in your pheromones. “...Give you an heir..” He says almost mindlessly. You're from a long line of well respected wizards so he figures you’ll want someone to carry on that legacy.

“Draco.” Your cock is straining in your pants. “You can't say things like that to an alpha so casually.”

His tail curls. “‘M sorry..” He looks at you cutely. He's intimidated and turned on at the same time.

“It's okay, sweetheart.” You gently slide two fingers inside him. “You just have to take responsibility.”

Draco gulps, shivering with pleasure thanks to the size and roughness of your fingers. He's never been able to get off just by using his fingers but he probably could with yours.

“You're the most beautiful man I’ve ever laid my eyes on, Draco.” You look at him lovingly as you skillfully play with his pussy. “I wish our relationship started differently.”

He feels less hesitant hearing you say that. He truly believes it's his fault. “It's…it’s okay.” He looks at you with a slight smile.

“Maybe we could've had a slow burn. Where I’d help you out after class and you’d lean in a little too close…You’d blush and act like nothing happened..”

Draco starts to fantasize along with you.

“Then, some day, we'd finally go for it. My hand on your thigh, your soft lips on mine…I’d take it real slow for you.” You swarm him with loving kisses. “I’d give your pretty little tits lots of love.” You aim your kisses onto his chest. He whimpers. 

“Then I’d finger you, just like this.” You start aiming for his weak points, causing adorable moans and squirms. He shudders with pleasure and grabs your arms for stability. He's gonna come.

Draco calls out your name, toes curling as he squirts. You bring your fingers to your mouth and lick them before moving your head in between his cunt and doing the same thing. He shudders with pleasure.

You pull away. “Are you ready?”

He nods softly. His eyes trail over to your crotch, watching intently as you pull your pants down. Just seeing your hard cock through your underwear is throwing him for a loop. He has to admit, he really likes it. Draco’s mouth hangs open when he finally sees your cock in his more sober state of mind. He knows alpha’s are beyond average but this is…

“I’ll be more gentle this time.” You say, rubbing your dick along his pussy and coating it with his wetness before slowly inching it inside him. It feels agonizingly slow for you but it feels great for Draco, which is all that matters. You interlock your hand with his. His face scrunches up cutely

“Don't– don't stop–” He moans. You're stretching him out well.  

“How do you feel, baby?”

“Good– I feel good, sir~” He throws his head back and instinctively reaches for his t-cock, sliding back the hood and stroking himself gently as a dick shaped bump appears on his stomach. He looks great when he's getting fucked but there's something special about seeing him touch himself. It's hot.

You bottom out and pause. “Keep touching yourself like that for me, okay?” You gently knead his thighs.

Draco lets out a high pitched “Mhm~” as he raises his hips. He didn't think it'd ever feel this good to be so full. His eyelashes flutter beautifully as he comes again.

“Good boy.” You praise him.

He pulls his hand away and lays down, trying to catch his breath. “I…I wanna keep- keep going..”

“Are you sure?”

He nods. He's never been as sure as he is now. He's glad you didn't hold back in your office. If you didn't, he'd have no idea how amazing it feels to have you inside him, stretching him out like a new pair of boots. “I wanna feel it move..” He places his hand on his stomach. He has no clue how seductive he's being right now.

You start making short thrusts, getting him used to the feeling. “Feels okay?”

Draco nods. “‘s good-” He twitches. “You're so…so big…professor…I’m so full…”

“You like being full, baby?”

“Mhm~ I love it~” He bites his lip. There's no better tranquilizer than the combination of an alpha’s cock and pheromones. “Faster…”

You lift his legs up and roughly pound into him. “Like this?”

“Ye- yes–!” Draco moans. It looks like his heat is coming back in full swing. The medicine you gave him was pretty useless. “Ba- baby– I wanna have—” He gasps, having another orgasm.

“Don't worry, I’ll make sure to breed you properly tonight.”

His lips stretch into a wide grin. His moans get louder the longer you fuck him. His hair is a mess and his face is so, so red. You hope he remembers this time, although you're not opposed to showing him again. You cup his cheek and he leans in. His eyelids are just barely open. You’ve never felt so possessive of something or someone in your life. “Mine.” You lean into his neck and suck on the spot where you marked him. 

Draco shivers. He feels hot and dizzy. All he can think is: “knot me” “breed me” “so big” “so good” 

Your movements suddenly stutter as you feel your orgasm drawing closer. You thrust one last time before pumping him full of your seed. Draco comes again. You’re still hard.

You pull away from his neck and move him into a mating press. “One more, then I’ll knot you.” You promise, thrusting more roughly and sloppily than before. Draco wraps his arms around your back as his tail brushes against you. His head is pounding, the words “knot me” are on loop in his mind. He digs his nails into your skin.

“So deep~” He shudders, making his own markings on your back.

You're finally starting to really get affected by his pheromones. It was already pretty bad before but now, you don't feel like you're in control anymore. “‘M gonna knot you, Draco, breed you til you can't walk…fill you up with my seed..” You kiss him roughly, lightly biting on his bottom lip. Usually, it's not hard for you to go multiple rounds but there's something about Draco’s scent that’s making you more sensitive. Maybe it's because you're a pair.

“I’m coming, sweetheart-” You groan as Draco’s warm walls drag another orgasm out of you, a knot forms to keep it all inside. 

Draco smiles drunkenly, grinding his hips. “I love you..”

“I love you too.”

[venusbyline]

Revenge ࿐ྂ Kinktober. 30, oct.

(late post)

— pairing: Aemond Targaryen x niece!reader x Aegon II Targaryen

— type: smut, dark, Kinktober (House of the Dragon Edition)

— kink: mirror sex

— summary: Aegon wants to please you, his niece and betrothed, during the night of your nineteenth name day. However, everything goes wrong when you reject Aegon's touch and he decides to try to make amends with Aemond, letting the younger prince take revenge on your brothers in the worst way possible.

— word count: 4.0k

— tags/warnings: kinktober 30th day, female!reader, dark!Aegon, dark!Aemond, Jacaerys' twin sister!reader, betrothed!Aegon, DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT (i'm not kidding, this is REALLY disgusting), rape/non-con, mirror sex, Targcest (uncles/niece), degradation, non-consensual somnophilia, vaginal sex, rough sex, breeding kink, blood and violence, squirting, overstimulation, forced orgasm, dacryphilia, crying, dumbification, vaginal fingering, unconscious sex, fainting/collapsing, forced pregnancy, cum eating, cum swallowing, blood licking, sexism, age gap (older men/younger woman), marriage of convenience, ambiguous/open ending, implied/referenced cheating, face slapping, hair-pulling, sadism, revenge sex, threats of death, emotional manipulation, book accurate ages (It's 133 AC. Reader's 19, Aemond's 23, Aegon's 26, Jacaerys' 19, Lucerys' 18, Joffrey's 16), referenced Targaryen-Velaryon Incest (sister/brothers), referenced consensual underage sex, minor Velaryon brothers/reader, implied Aemond Targaryen/Helaena Targaryen, bisexual(?)!Aemond, bisexual(?)!Aegon, minor Aemond Targaryen/Aegon Targaryen, Aegond, dark content, dom!Aemond, switch!Aegon, sub!reader, canon divergence (No Dance of the Dragons/War for Succession), porn with plot. no use of y/n. english is not my first language.

— tagging list: @baybaybear1 @blessedbymoon @p45510n4f4shi0n @lina-lovebug @moonnicole @badger-reads @dearjardim

— author notes: It's MENTIONED during the fic that Aegon's obsession with the reader has been going on since before the night in Driftmark, 120 AC. So at that time, you would be 6 years old and Aegon would be 13/14. Although this is just a MENTION of Aegon's dark desires and isn't graphic at all, it's important that you understand about the Dead Dove: Do Not Eat tag and read all trigger warnings. This is just a FANFICTION, but Aegon's thoughts are disgusting anyway.

— crossposting: AO3

Aegon II Targaryen had been quite impulsive when choosing the woman he would marry. He knew that getting betrothed to his niece, Jacaerys's twin sister, would not be an idea well received by his family, especially by his mother and his younger brother, Aemond, but he decided to act on that decision without thinking too much about the possible consequences.

His obsession with you, the only daughter of his half-sister, Rhaenyra, was almost unhealthy. Aegon has watched you grow, just as he has watched Jacaerys and Lucerys grow. He liked to see you trying to keep up with them when the three boys got together to play some trick on Aemond. They never let you spend much time with them, and Aegon even made fun of you, just like he did with Aemond.

At that time, Aegon did not know how to deal with the intense feelings he felt about you, finding it disgusting that he was much older than you. Gods, you were younger even than Aemond. He really could not deal with those thoughts, and venting about them to someone would be a bad idea. He would probably get a beating from Harwin Strong — the man all people of King's Landing knew was your true father — when the knight was still alive.

Trying to keep you far away, Aegon chose making you a butt of jokes. Jacaerys and Lucerys never seemed to notice how Aegon really felt about their sister and even liked to have fun at your expense.

As the years passed, the family had grown apart. The fight involving Aemond against Lucerys, Jacaerys and Daemon's daughters parted the Targaryen family into two sides. Despite always being a terrible older brother, Aegon had tried to make it up to Aemond after he lost his eye. He did not like to admit that he blamed himself a little for what happened. However, the thought occurred to him with a damn frequency. If Aegon had not been drinking like an asshole that night, perhaps he could have defended his brother.

He wanted to be a better brother to Aemond, he really tried to be, but nothing seemed to be enough for the younger prince. Nothing seemed to make him happy. Not even when Aegon took Aemond, who was still ten and three years old, to a brothel and introduced him to Madam Sylvi. Aegon thought his brother would like to become a complete man and he would like to get his cock wet. But he was definitely wrong.

He could remember with anguish how Aemond opened the curtains and walked out into the halls of the brothel after the act. Aegon tried to ask him how the sex had been, if he had liked it... But all Aemond did was give him a cold and hurt look, replacing his eye patch and continuing to walk so both of them could leave soon.

When Aegon returned to the brothel the next week, he asked Madam Sylvi about Aemond performance and expected a naughty response from the whore. Anyway, hearing the phrase "He is not a child now" clearly did not sound as sensual as he imagined. He needed to drink a little more to avoid wanting to cry when he realized that in fact Aemond was no longer a child. He had taken that away from his brother when he convinced the younger to joined him to Street of Silk. Even after so many pranks, until that fateful day in Driftmark, Aemond still trusted his older brother. He was still an innocent child, with just one eye and his fierce Dragon.

And Aegon had destroyed the last vestige of innocence inside Aemond's heart. Aegon had ruined everything again, just as he had ruined everything every time he played tricks on you with your brothers and called you a fucking bastard the night Lucerys accidentally took out Aemond's eye during the childish and violent fight. You were not even there when all of that happened, but Aegon thought offending you would be like making up to Aemond for his absence and lack of protection.

Now, 133 AC, thirteen years after the family chaos in Driftmark, Aegon was trying to slowly restore some peace by proposing to his half-sister, Queen Rhaenyra, a betrothal to you. It was a way of seeking a truce between the grudge that Rhaenyra and Daemon held for Alicent and her children. And most important of all, it was a way to make amends with you and Aemond, even if his brother hated you.

"What do you think about your new necklace, my dear?" Aegon asked you after the festival in King's Landing to celebrate your and your twin brother Jacaerys' nineteenth year of life.

"It is very beautiful, uncle." You replied with a tense voice, observing yourself in the large mirror with golden edges in Aegon's private chambers.

You were not someone who liked breaking the rules, especially when they involved secret meetings with your uncle Aegon. You still harbored resentment for the way he started to mock your and your brothers' legitimacy after Rhaenyra and Alicent's complete estrangement. At first, you thought about denying his call for you to accompany him through the castle corridors, but the idea of receiving one more gift seemed tempting. And in fact, you did not regret. Actually, you were enchanted by the necklace with the pendant of a golden dragon with silver-toned wings.

"Do not call me uncle anymore, my dear. You are my future wife now." Aegon reminded you with a chuckle, standing behind you and watching as you admired the pendant. He could see the way you seemed to want to ask something and he knew exactly what it was. "Yeah, the dragon on the pendant was made especially to represent Vermithor."

He said and your eyes widened immediately. Just like Rhaena and Aemond, there was no dragon for you when you were born. You only managed to claim Vermithor four years ago, however, your bond with the elder dragon was already quite admirable. Vermithor was a fierce creature to everyone and he was like a puppy to you, so meek and docile that sometimes you found yourself venting alone to him. A habit that only increased even more after your mother confirming your betrothal with your uncle.

"This is... This is... This is incredible." Your eyes filling with tears. You lifted your face to observe Aegon's reflection behind you, his soft smile as he returned your gaze. "My most sincere thanks, Aegon. This is the kindest and sweetest gift I have ever received. I swear."

Aegon's cheeks flushed a little. He was not used to being kine or sweet. Much less listen someone calling him like that. Your thanks slightly caught him off guard and he cleared his throat, trying to hide his sudden nervousness, hoping you would not notice how sweaty and shaky his hands were when he placed them on your shoulders, a little taller than you while you were still watching each other in the mirror. "You look so fucking delightful right now."

He purred into your earlobe. The warm air and the smell of wine made you frown and step back. You were not used to being touched like this by men who were not your brothers and you did not feel comfortable with Aegon's sudden physical proximity. Of course he was your fiance and very soon you would be forced to consummate the marriage, but there were still many barriers between the two of you. Barriers he built to keep you away when you were a child and now he was determined to break them at any cost.

"Do not do that again." Aegon scolded you, fire coursing through his veins at your abrupt departure. He hated that you were acting like you were disgusted by him. Damn, he was trying to be good, was not he? He was being a good betrothed and redeeming himself with you. "I gave you a fucking gift you loved!"

You flinched at his loud husky voice, stopping just looking at him in the mirror and turning to him, the size difference not being as intimidating as it was when you were still a little girl seeking approval from your uncle and your brothers. He did not even have the same long hair as before. Now, Aegon kept his dry silver hair to a medium length, giving him an appearance of lack of care, as well as the intense dark circles under his eyes. Even though you would never admit it, you feared him but also you thought he was very handsome at the same time. Like your child version also thought these same things about Aegon when he was a teenager.

"And I already thanked you for it. However, I do not remember allowing you to touch me the way you just did."

"Seven Hells, do not be an annoying prude! I just rested my hands on your shoulder."

"And purred in my ear like a cat in heat, surely thinking I would give in to you so easily and we would sleep together before our wedding ceremony!" You exclaimed, without thinking straight. Your heartbeat was racing, your face red with anger that he had the audacity to call you an annoying prude.

Aegon growled at your words, moving closer to your body, until your faces were practically glued together and you could smell the wine he had been drinking throughout the festival, just as he could smell flowers fragrance coming from you. The tension was palpable, both of you staring at each other with anger in your eyes. It was like flames burning each other just with gazes.

You thought he would yell at you or at most throw you out of his chambers and take the gift back. You expected many things, except Aegon to abruptly cover your mouth, holding the back of your head with his other hand to stop you from struggling and running away.

"Perhaps, you bastard bitch, I am acting like a cat in heat because I know what a cheap whore you are." Aegon growled one more time, the fingers that had been holding the back of your neck now gripping your hair. "You always act like you are a maiden, but all people of King's Landing is already suspicious about how your cunt has already been filled several times by your twin brother. Jacaerys seemed quite furious when my betrothal with you was made official."

Aegon pushed you onto his large bed and you immediately tried to get up and scream, being stopped by the hard slap he gave you in the face, making you fall back onto his sheets, terrified as he climbed on top of you, holding both of your arms on top of your head. "If you try to do that fucking shit again, I am going to rip your fucking head off and gut you until you die. Our entire family is going to go to war and blood is going to be spilled because you are still the same spoiled bastard who cried and wanted to fit in with me when we were younger."

Something made you stop fighting against the situation. Perhaps it was your childhood memories of seeking approval from Aegon, Jace and Luke. Perhaps it was the threat of more chaos happening in your family if Aegon killed you. Perhaps it was all the alcohol you happily drank during your and Jace's name day celebration. Perhaps it was because you already knew that Aegon would rape you anyway if he was determined to do so. Perhaps it was all of that. You simply stopped, sobbing a few times before shaking your head.

"Good girl..." Aegon chuckled at your submissive reaction. "Just look at the ceiling, alright? I promise it will be good."

You did not know what Aegon meant, only understanding when you obeyed. Looking up at the ceiling, you saw that there was a large mirror placed there. You could watch yourself lying in bed, your face soaked with tears, your hair disheveled and your hands being held above your head. You had never been so shocked due a reflection. It was a clear sample of Aegon's obsession, firm fingers holding your wrists in the way he wanted, while his other hand simply hiked up your nightgown, taking advantage of your lack of reaction to take off and throw your underwear on the floor. Aegon was about to take off the tunic he was wearing, before being interrupted by the door opening and then closing.

"Am I interrupting something, brother? One of your guards said you demanded my presence here. I was busy and could not arrive at the ordered time." Aemond's cold voice echoed through Aegon's chambers and your eyes widened. You looked away from your reflection for a while, barely feeling Aegon fingering your slightly wet folds. You was incredulous at the fact that Aemond was so nonchalant with the sight of his older brother about to rape their niece. You could not tell if it was simply because Aegon often did atrocities like this or if it was also because Aemond had hated you since both of you were kids and he was not at all pleased with his brother's obsession with marrying you.

"Oh, busy with Helaena, I must assume." Aegon teased his brother and Aemond rolled his eyes, clearing his throat and pointing to the scene in front of him.

"May I know why my presence here is necessary?" The youngest asked and a moan escaped your lips when Aegon stuck two fingers inside you at once, drawing your attention back to him. Aegon raised his eyebrow as he noticed how, despite the painful and abrupt intrusion, your little cunt accepted his fingers without much difficulty, which meant not only that you were no longer a maiden, but that you had also fucked with someone recently and completely ignored your future marriage with your uncle.

"Looks like you were not the only person to fuck with your own sister today, brother."

Aemond could not help but smirk, tilting his head in mockery when he saw Aegon took his fingers out of you and shake your wetness away, almost as if he was disgusted. "Who would have thought that the rumors about her and Jacaerys were true..." The prince mocked, approaching the bed and making you flinched your body into the mattress. "Tell me, dear niece and sister-in-law... Which of your Strong brothers has already fucked your dirty and disgusting cunt? Only Jacaerys? Or also Lucerys and Joffrey?"

You whimpered at the invasive and demeaning question, knowing you would be in danger if you revealed the true, but you would also be in danger if you lied. "Not Joffrey yet."

It was Aegon's turn to mock, with some irritation. "Joffrey's small cock has not gotten wet inside you yet, but I bet you at least taught him how to eat you out. After all, he is already ten and six. That is old enough." The stare Aegon received from Aemond made him swallow hard. It was clear that his younger brother still felt angry about what happened at the brothel when he was thirteen. "Well, I mean..."

Aemond ignored his brother's attempt to justify himself and looked back at you, his cold hand touching your warm core, enjoying your wetness and rubbing your pearl, eliciting confused and tearful moans, your mind trying to encourage you to scream and run far away of them and your body begging him to keep rubbing your clit. Perhaps a little stronger. Stronger enough to draw your blood. Jace, Luke and Joffrey were always too sweet to you. Too noble. "That does not matter. What matters is that you are nothing more than a hole for your brothers to use."

You swallowed hard, closing your eyes and letting the tears flow. When you turned your face away, Aemond's hand grabbed you by the chin, forcing you to pay attention to what he was saying. "Now I understand why my brother was obsessed with you when we were younger. You were always a cockslut, I bet."

His words sinked your heart and you shook your head, so fast that your vision even blurred. You wanted to deny it, say that you were nothing like that, say that Aegon had never been really obsessed with you. But nothing came out of your lips. Actually, your panicked mind was starting to make you believe that Aemond could be right about both things.

"Uhm, I still remember everything before that night in Driftmark... How you were always running after Aegon and your brothers, desperate to be seen... Just like how my brother was always pushing you away." He scoffed, gripping your chin tighter. "Probably because he felt sick about himself thinking those naughty things about you. After all, you were only six years old and he was almost ten and four. A drunk teenager wishing for such perverse things and—"

Aegon grimaced as Aemond spoke, clearly uncomfortable about having his dirty little secret exposed right in front of you. "That is enough, Aemond." The older man softly growled and Aemond frowned and let go of your chin abruptly, his thin lips pulled into a sarcastic smile.

"You still have not told me why you demanded my presence here, brother." The last word sounded bitter to the ears of the three of you and Aegon took a deep breath, determined to take control of the situation again. Or at least a little part of the control.

He pointed to you, lying on the bed with the legs open, your cunt now wetter and your face reddened from crying, the empty look in your eyes making it obvious how confused and vulnerable you were. The confused and vulnerable state that your own uncle and future husband had left you simply because you refused his touch.

Aemond did not seem at all bothered by what he was seeing. You did not notice any trace of desire coming from him either and if it were not for the way a slight bulge began to appear in his pants, you would even believe that the scorn and resentment he always felt for you was bigger than the anger and desire to get revenge on Jacaerys and Lucerys.

"Are you offering me our niece?"

The question was said without a hint of enthusiasm and Aegon laughed, knowing his brother well enough to know that he just wanted to maintain the typical facade of indifference. "Well... I wanted to give you and my betrothed a gift. I was going to suggest that the three of us have some fun tonight to celebrate her name day..." Aegon purred, his calloused fingers caressing your bare thigh. "However, due to her spoiled and thankless behavior, I wish you to take her first."

Aemond was surprised at first, his good eye switching between you and his brother. He had already imagined several possibilities to get revenge for the things his nephews did when they were all kids. He had even thought that your betrothal to Aegon was already a good form of revenge, despite hating his brother even more when he realized that he had never gotten over that ridiculous obsession with you.

Jacaerys, Lucerys and Joffrey had been furious when they discovered that their mother had agreed to let Aegon marry you. They were scared of what would happen to you, neither of them ever believing Aegon's stupid explanation about a peace treaty.

Aemond knew that his nephews would be furious if they knew what he was about to do with you, just as he knew what Aegon wanted. Aemond was not dumb, he understood that Aegon blamed himself for the tragic events in his life. Aemond understood that Aegon blamed himself for taking away his chance to lose his virginity willingly and with someone he was really attracted to.

And then, Aegon was there, giving you to him like an apology. Also, he was giving Aemond the chance to take revenge on his nephews and take you before himself.

Aemond did not respond with words. Instead, he just pushed Aegon aside, taking his brother's place on the bed and starting to undo the ties of the tunic he was wearing.

With each brutal thrust from Aemond, a tearful scream from you resounded throughout the chambers, muffled by Aegon's large hand, who was sitting next to you, caressing your dark hair with his free fingers.

All of the three of you was admiring different points of the view reflected by the mirror on the ceiling. Aegon was focused on the sight of your little cunt, so tight and being brutally fucked by Aemond's thick and rosy cock. Aegon could hear the sudden noises caused each time Aemond's body hit yours hard, your wet core making it easier for your uncle and brother-in-law to fuck you rough and deep enough that the walls of your cunt began to feel so much sore.

Despite the blurred tear-filled vision, you stared at yourself in the reflection, your heart clenching with self-loathing as your muffled screams stopped being pleas for Aemond to stop hurting you and started becoming just loud whimpers about how you were cumming again. You had actually lost count of how many times you had cum around Aemond's cock. You had already lost count of how many times you had squirted and even lost consciousness for a few seconds.

You felt like you were about to die and all that kept you alive was Aegon's fingers stroking your hair like you were his precious doll and Aemond's seed filling you for the second time in the last hour. Aemond looked at his own reflection after cumming inside you, his Sapphire's eye shining in the mirror, as well as the sweaty skin of his chest. He felt powerful. He felt alive. And best of all, he finally felt the good but bitter taste of revenge.

You were almost sure that Aemond was determined to breed you. And you were almost sure that Aegon had allowed it, because even when his younger brother pulled his wet cock out of your sensitive and bruised hole, Aegon just waited for Aemond to start getting dressed to take his place, bending down in front of you and licking the mixture of blood and cum that dripped from your cunt, ignoring your tears and the forced submission coming from your trembling body.

"You are disgusting, Aegon." Aemond huffed after Aegon licked and sucked your clit until you were squirting on his face too, your weak whimpers making you look like a sad kitten. "You should stop. She will end up convulsing and dying if she cums again."

"Oh, but she wants to cum again. Do not you want that, my dear?" Aegon teased, rubbing your swollen reddened pearl. You shook your head, the confused movement seemed like a confirmation and a denial at the same time, which elicited a chuckle from your future husband. He turned to Aemond and pointed at you. "See? She is going to be a perfect wife. All it took was a cock and she is already completely stupid and brainless, like a real good wife should be."

"Uhm, I guess she is not a very strong girl." Aemond scoffed, the word Strong bringing you horrible memories and making you whimper and turn your face into the pillow, until you finally fell asleep while Aegon was still eating you out. "I am serious, brother. Let our whore niece sleep and get some rest." Aemond murmured a little impatiently, his eye scanning the Vermithor pendant of your new necklace and then to Aegon's lips, wet with your juices and creamy with the mess of your blood and Aemond's seed. "Just stop eating my seed. Your future wife will not get pregnant with my child if you keep being a greedy and needy slut, sucking out all my cum just for you."

Aegon's eyes widened, in disbelief at his brother's words, raising the head and being interrupted just as he was about to defend himself. "Besides, you are going to end up cumming in your own pants if you keep just watching everything and settling for scraps. Our niece's cunt is delightful, however, I will be waiting for you in my private chambers so you can continue apologizing to me, brother."

HOTD Edition - Masterlist

Criminal Minds Edition - Masterlist

Venusbyline's Kinktober 2024 - Masterlist

[zletros-creations]

With a name like "The Crown of Tyrants," many get the wrong idea. That something of such moniker would be used by the vile to rule the lowly. To their dismay, however, my powers would never yield themselves to one who seeks domination or destruction. But this man who holds me solemnly in his dirty, broken hands would see a side of me not witnessed since my creation. I saw him bring nations to their knees, I watched him burn countless, kill his own family with his own bare hands. He was a true tyrant, a killer, and a monster, but now he knelt in the ruins of his kingdom, no subjects to rule, no land to call his own. I was all he had left, a dirty, dented crown he once guarded selfishly. He threw me away in rage. He blamed me for making him what he was. While it's true his descent began after he wore me, it was not my influence that drove him to destruction, and he knew it. He was still tearing into me when he was interrupted by a pained wail. It was sound we were both far too familiar with, the sounds of a dying baby... When he went towards its source, I feared the worst. But unlike what I expected, he picked the crying baby up, a cloud of smoke obscured what happened next, but the crying ceased, not suddenly and all together, but gently and gradually. When the smoke cleared, his back was turned to me, and a tiny hand waved from his silhouette's shoulder.

The next day, the survivors of the insurrection entered the streets and investigated the ruins of their homes. One peasant recognized me and what it meant to see me separated from my previous owner. He picked me up and waved me victoriously in the air. His cheers caught the attention of some others, and they too recognized what I signified. Their king, their killer, was no more...

Soon, everyone was gathered and celebrated their liberation, and to end their celebration, the peasant threw me away, and when I landed, another kicked me further down, and again, and again. Before anyone knew it, I was far from the castle ruins, into the countryside, and lost in a bush.

I remained there, in that bush, for some time. Summer storms and snowy winters weathered me, but I maintained. One day, a young girl found me and yanked me from the branches that suspended me. She admired me for a while before stuffing me in her bag and skipping off, singing a song in a foreign language, her voice seemed familiar to me.

When I was finally released from the bag at the hands of the one who had put me there, I was shocked when I saw the man I was being shown off to. A face I expected never to see again. The Old King took me gently, with the permission of the girl. I recognized his face, but his eyes were different. He looked at me not with greed, like the first time he saw me, or with rage, like the last time he held me. But with reverence.

"I'm sorry." He told me. And he began crying. "I'm so sorry." He coughed. The girl went to comfort him, but he pulled away. Her eyes drooped. The king snapped out of his pity and hugged the girl. "It's okay." He told her. "We'll be OK."

I began to glow then, as my true nature was revealed. The king and his daughter watched me with awe as my brilliance, which the old tyrant could have never forced out of me, finally showed through.

"I get it now." The king began. "The Crown of Tyrants." He called me. "Not as a man of cruelty would your power shine, but only a man reformed can know your greatness." He said, and I shone brighter. "Tyrants Redemption, that's your true name." He picked me up and donned me. His grey hairs turned dark again, his wrinkled flesh tightened around his bones cured of arthritis. His atrophied arms filled out, and he was again young and healthy as the day he found me. He left his cottage, his farm that before was completely pitiful was now lush and his crops were ripe. He took a tomato, its juices oozed down his neck as he bit into it. He handed another to his daughter, who seemed to never have seen such elegant fruit before. The old Tyrant, a tyrant no longer, saw fit to spend the rest of his days in a slightly renovated cottage with a lustrous farm and his daughter, who not only reunited him with his crown, but was the sole reason that I would serve him to begin with.

A crown is only as powerful as the one who wears it. And there is no strength greater than overcoming your own evil.

You're a choosy magical artifact with a very specific criteria - in order to be deemed worthy, a potential wielder must have once committed great evils, but genuinely desire to change and atone for their wrongs.

[gadriezmannsgirl]

Pepi's birthday fic!🪄🎩🍌 Pookie's 22 now🥹 still such a baby💛

Also, I inspired in my fic about Gavi loving neck kisses, I keep seeing how Pedri gives forehead kisses to his teammates, I can imagine him doing that to his gf😭 so here it is!

One more thing, referring to the picture below what is it need to do for Pedri to look at me like that? 😭😭😭

Forehead Kisses -PG8

Summary: He loves forehead kisses and so do you.

Since the very beggining of your relationship with Pedri, you quickly learned all his habits, manias, facts, likes, dislikes; for example when he scrunches his face in concentration and pulls out the tip of his tongue, when he's nervous he taps his fingers against his thigh, he secretly loves rom-com movies, he's reserved with his things, his people, including you and his life. You knew how to read every single bit of him.

In your relationship, he's the most perfect partner, barely forgets dates, always texts or calls you, he is interested in your things, he cares for you and for your family, he gets along with your friends, he loves communicating with you. He's just him.

When it's only the two of you or with his/your family around, nothing can stop him from being all over you, they know how he is and they know how in love with you he is. On the other hand, he's very reserved while being in public, going as far as a hand hold, a hand on the back of your seat, a hand on your thigh or a small kiss on your forehead. That could never be missed.

You've never told Pedri before but you knew he loved giving forehead kisses, not just to you but also to his teammates, his friends and family.

And you loved them as well, that much you sometimes started looking for them, pushing your forehead into him so he could lean down and press his lips in your temple. It never failed to make you feel loved and protected by him.

So one morning, you were chopping the vegetables as Rosy was doing the eggs when you hear a small "Buenos días" (Good morning) and soon Pedri came into the kitchen with his face a bit swollen and a sleepy face.

"Buenos días" He got his reply from you all as he went one by one hugging his brother, Fer first; then his dad, then his mom and then he walked over to you.

"Buenos días, amor" (Good morning, love) You say briefly looking up at him before grabbing an onion and start cutting it.

"Buen día, preciosa" (Morning, gorgeous) He mumbles, one of his arms wrapped around you as he hugs your side with his lips against your temple and staying there.

"Still feeling sleepy?" He nods humming and inhaling your shampoo scent "Why don't you go upstairs then, vida? I can go to you once breakfast it's ready" He shook his head

"You know I can't sleep without you in my arms" You smile softly before lifting your head, making him open his eyes and look down at you

"It'll be only for a few minutes" You whisper so it's just the two of you when he shakes his head -no- leaning once again to give your forehead a kiss and then he went a bit further down to your lips and kissed you softly. "Amor, go"

"You can go with him, Y/N/N" Fer says coming up to you "I can handle this"

"No, don't worry. I'm almost done"

"Go, hija" Rosy spoke up "You must be tired as well, you just came from a flight a few hours ago"

"I'm good, I promise. Let me just finish this"

"Hijo" (Son) Fernando said looking at Pedri, who just chuckled and grabbed you by the back of your thighs

You dropped the knife and the onion in the counter, letting a small yell out "¡Ahh Pedri! Fernando, Rosy; I want to help!"

"You already helped us, bonita" (Pretty) Fernando said

"But I love doing that type of salad, please!"

"I'll do it" Fer smiled

"Make sure to add mustard and a bit of sugar, please!" You raise your voice as Pedri pulled the two of you out of the kitchen "You're mean"

"I just want my girlfriend, too much to ask?"

"No" You kissed his cheek "You were going to have me after helping your parents, now they'll think bad of me"

"Preciosa, we've been together for almost three years now, they absolutely love you, they could never think bad of you" Pedri opened the door to his room, letting you in and closing the door on him "You're their daughter, now" He said now on the bed, covering the both of you with the blankets.

"Is my food that bad?" You ask

"Nena" (Baby) "Stop that. They absolutely love and adore you and your skills" He said dropping a kiss to your temple.

You smiled "Wanna know something?" You whisper

"What's up?"

"I really love you giving me forehead Kisses. They're my favorite" You say feeling your cheeks grow red

"Are they?" You nod embarrassed hiding your face into his neck. You feel and hear Pedri's giggle "Don't be embarrassed"

"Don't laugh at me!"

"I'm not! I just think you're way too cute" He kissed your temple one more time

"Pedriiii" You whine

"Wanna know something too?" He pulls his face away, so you're looking straight into his big brown eyes

"What?"

"I love giving you forehead kisses" He smiles "They're my favorite type of kiss too" You smile at him, both of you lean in and soon your lips meet in a slow, loving kiss. "I love you"

"I love you too, Pepi"

°°° °°° °°° °°°

Taglist: @gaviymarcsbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela (if you'd like to be tagged, let me know!) also @luvgavii 🫶🏻✨ a small birthday gift, hope you like it!

[janiehellion]

New Blood In An Old Place

ONESHOT

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: The quietest souls have the loudest hearts, and you just found yourself staring at the sky—wondering if Daryl Dixon might be the one to make the stars in the night feel a little closer and less out of reach.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: DARYL DIXON X READER

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: SELECTIVE MUTISM / FLUFF / MILD ANGST / SLOW BURN / CANON DIVERGENCE

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 4.515

ꜱᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ: LATE S9 & EARLY S10

MASTERLIST & REQUEST GUIDELINES

You’d always been the quiet type, even before the world fell apart. Silence wasn’t something that scared you; it was where you felt most at home. And it made survival easier too. The less noise you made, the harder it was for anyone—dead or alive—to find you.

But the sudden loss of your voice wasn’t something that had happened overnight, and it wasn’t a head injury either. No, it came quietly, over time, like a shadow that only grew darker.

You’d always had a voice—loud and clear. You’d argued with friends, laughed at the dumbest jokes, and sang along to songs so loud just to annoy people in a karaoke bar alongside your friends.

You had a life.

But then, just a few weeks before the world ended, you started to notice it. At first, you brushed it off—just a little hoarseness, maybe a harmless cold. Then, when you tried to speak like you used to, nothing came out. Not even a whisper.

The feeling was like swallowing a stone, with you choking on the problem to get the words out. The doctors couldn’t explain it at first. They said it could be stress-related, maybe an anxiety disorder and coming from trauma. They called it selective mutism in adulthood, but that didn’t help you feel any better about the situation.

You could still speak, technically, since your vocal cords weren’t damaged. But when you tried to speak, it felt like something in your brain held your voice hostage. It would just come out weak.

In moments when you were alone, you could speak freely, but it wasn’t as perfect as you wanted it to be. Your voice trembled like it wasn’t used to its own sound. Still… it was there. But around other people? You just couldn’t use it anymore.

And the silence became more than just silence—it became a prison between you and the world.

In the final days before the world ended, you stopped trying completely. The fear of trying to speak only to fail took its toll. So, you leaned into it. It was easier. You could still communicate, just not with words. You had learned sign language before, but now it was something that felt more like a lifeline than a language at times.

Even after the world fell apart, after the deaths and all the losses during all those years, you still clung to being quiet. It was safer that way. It just kept the world's horrors far enough from you.

But sometimes, late at night, when you found yourself alone with your thoughts, your voice would slip through, quiet and unsure, with nobody else but the stars in the sky around to listen.

When you crossed paths with Magna’s group, you’d been alone for so long that trying to talk again seemed almost foreign. But Connie understood that without you ever having to say a thing. She figured you out right away and never tried to get you to talk; she never pushed you toward expectations.

When you met, she just looked at you and raised her hands to start signing. She’d seen right through you, understanding that your silence wasn’t a weakness. For you, it became like a secret language, something shared between survivors who didn’t need words to know how to hold each other up.

In a way, it felt good—like being given permission to go back to silence, but without the loneliness that had followed you for so long. The group simply took you in and accepted you without any restraint.

Magna was a bit hesitant about you, but you caught the looks she’d exchanged with Connie when it came to you. Kelly, on the other hand, was curious from the start, even though she held back her questions. Luke was kinder than he had any right to be, filling in all the gaps that words used to with music. And Yumiko—well, she kept her distance at first but always nodded in respect whenever you shared a knowing glance.

For once, you didn’t feel like a liability just because you weren’t talking about every thought that crossed your mind. You found friends within them. Maybe it was Connie’s warm smiles or Kelly’s easy acceptance. Or maybe it was the way they didn’t stare too long when you used your hands instead of your voice—how they gave you room to be silent without feeling the need to fill it.

There was a safety in it—an invisibility that let you see things without being seen yourself. The new world was loud enough; you didn’t need to add to the noise. Besides, words were like a last resort. Hand signs and body language could fill in the rest.

And so the days in the new world passed by. The old one had ended, and with it, so many things you had once known. But your silence remained, and you thought it would always be that way.

Until one night changed everything.

The first time you saw Hilltop, it felt like a miracle—a place that actually looked like it could hold the world at bay. People worked the fields, tended to livestock, and repaired anything that needed to be repaired. It was almost overwhelming—the noise and the life.

Your eyes wandered, taking in everything. Connie nudged you once, signing quickly, "Are you okay?"

"Just watching," you signed back and nodded, quick enough to not draw attention. She gave you a thumbs-up and returned to whatever was happening around you.

That’s when you noticed him.

You held your ground under his stare, tilting your head slightly as if to say, "What are you looking at?"

He didn’t answer, of course, just turned back to the person he’d been talking to. His crossbow was slung over one shoulder, the weapon looking as much a part of him as his worn leather vest. He seemed like the kind of man who belonged in this world—strong, observant, and… silent.

Connie followed your eyes and smirked. She signed quickly. "That’s Daryl Dixon. Quiet, almost like you. You’ll like him."

You rolled your eyes, but a part of you wondered if she was right.

To say Daryl was wary would be an understatement. You’d watched him from a distance at first, both of you not interested in any kind of interaction at all.

But over time, it changed. Maybe it was because he saw the way you signed with Connie, or maybe he just figured he’d get more out of you by observing.

At first, it was small things. Daryl would catch you signing something to Connie—a quick exchange about the day, a comment on the weather—and his brow would furrow like he was trying to decipher a code. He didn’t do anything, not right away, but you noticed how his eyes looked at your hands more often.

He was practicing off to the side when he thought no one was looking, his fingers stiff and awkward as he tried to do a hand sign he’d seen. Once, you caught him fumbling through what looked like 'hello' and 'thank you' with some kind of concentration that might’ve been funny if it weren’t so earnest.

Sometimes, you’d sign something small—'Good morning.' or 'How are you?'—just to break the silence, and he’d respond in kind, while you’d answer with a nod or a slight smile, just enough to let him know he didn’t have to worry.

But he stuck with learning it, stubbornly repeating each sign until he got it right.

And when he finally worked up the nerve to really use it? Well, it didn’t go as smoothly as he had planned.

He approached you one afternoon, just as you were sitting down with Connie once more. He looked between the two of you, then at his hands with a bit of panic. Slowly and unsure, he signed, "Ya… okay?"

Connie held back a grin as she nudged you. You smiled, nodding at him before replying, "Yes. And you?"

The look on his face changed—relief, but still with a bit of embarrassment. "Good," he signed, then quickly ducked his head and whispered to himself, "'M still learnin’ for ya…"

But Connie wasn’t going to let him go just like that. She leaned over, her hands moving fast. "Not bad. But maybe do it even slower the next time?"

Daryl just scoffed in response, but he kept at it. His signs grew smoother over time, less clumsy, and much more confident. He’d even started picking up on the little things—how you’d tap your fingers when you were nervous or how Connie’s signs slowed when she was tired.

It wasn’t perfect, but something. And you couldn’t help but notice how often his eyes found yours during those quiet moments, like he was searching for something in the silence you shared.

And that’s how things were—a wordless connection that nobody questioned.

As the months passed by, helping with farming became your hobby. There was something relaxing about it—the rows of crops and the people working. You weren’t much of a farmer yourself, not yet, but sitting next to the fields, watching, or lending a hand when someone needed it, gave you something you hadn’t felt in years.

Sometimes, you just needed to be near it—something that grew, something that reminded you of life’s persistence, even in the darkest of times. The fields, the plants, the insects, and the small living things—they gave you a sense of belonging you couldn’t quite explain.

And Daryl? He started showing up more regularly, his eyes staying less on the dirt and more on you. He’d make little comments about the crops to himself or sign quick questions to you about what you were doing.

You found yourself signing more as well, explaining things through gestures and expressions, and he watched you like he was trying to remember every movement of your hands and fingers. Occasionally, he’d try to sign back something new he learned.

"Yer patient," he signed, seemingly out of nowhere. "With me."

You glanced at him in return, raising an eyebrow in question.

"Teachin’ me," he clarified, quickly scratching the back of his neck. "Most woulda given up by now."

You shrugged with a small smile in response. "You’re trying," you answered. "But you understand me just fine. And effort matters, too… even with your heavy accent."

He didn’t respond right away; he just ducked his head away and went back to work, but you saw the tiniest bit of a smirk before he did.

With him, the quiet moments started to feel… different.

By the end of the latest day, after almost everyone else in Hilltop was already asleep, you were still there, with Daryl, but now too lost in the way the stars twinkled in the night sky.

He had an uncomfortable look about him—the one that said, 'I’m not good at this, but I’m here.'

Daryl hesitated, sitting a few feet away, not sure whether to just hang back or leave. His eyes looked between you and the sky, clearly uncomfortable but trying not to show it.

"Ya… uh, ya do this a lot?" He asked after tapping your shoulder to get your attention.

You gestured back, "Sometimes. Have you never noticed before? I mean, it's… It's peaceful, don't you think?"

"Yeah. Peaceful," he signed back, his fingers shaking a little. "I get it. Don’ get a lotta quiet no more." He sat down closer to you without asking, close enough that you could feel the warmth of his body beside you, but not too close.

The first two hours passed by, and when the stars began to shine brighter through the cloudy sky, you caught him looking upward.

You nudged him gently, signing. "Pretty, huh?"

He only shrugged. "Ain’t seen ‘em like this in a while. Too much runnin’ 'round, I guess."

You smiled, and the time stretched on, but it wasn’t awkward—it was relaxing. Soon the wind picked up, the breeze feeling colder, and you couldn’t help the shiver that ran through you.

But Daryl noticed immediately. He moved behind you, pulling off his vest with a gruff. "Here. Take it."

You blinked at him, shaking your head and gesturing back quickly. "No. You’ll get cold."

He snorted, putting the vest on your lap stubbornly. "Don’ matter. Ain’t much colder’n usual for me."

You hesitated before reluctantly taking the vest and slipping it on. It was warm and quite soft, with the smell of leather and something distinctly Daryl Dixon clinging to it.

"Big on me," you signed, smiling at him before watching the clouds in the sky pass by.

He smirked to himself, looking away as if he didn't want you to know what he was thinking. "Looks better on ya anyway…"

The stars above seemed brighter somehow, and without thinking, you leaned closer to him, your shoulder touching his.

He froze for a second before relaxing, his eyes looking toward you in confusion. "Ya alright?"

"Feeling cozy already," you nodded, lifting your fingers to answer. "You know… it’s strange how big the world feels."

"Yeah," he mumbled to himself, looking upward before signing back to you. "Big 'nough to make ya feel like nothin’, huh?"

"No, not nothing," you signed, shaking your head. "Small? Yeah, maybe. But not nothing."

He grunted and smirked, though his expression stayed guarded as he signed further. "Suppose so. Don’ mean it’s a bad thing, bein’ small. Keeps ya humble. Like—hell, I ain’t out here thinkin’ I’m bigger’n the stars or nothin’. That’d jus' be so damn stupid."

You bit back a grin, but it wasn’t an uncomfortable one. If anything, it felt right—sitting close to him and just signing along. But when another shiver went through you, it startled him out of whatever thought had his attention.

He reached out awkwardly, his hand stopping near your shoulder before pulling back to sign, since he wasn't aware of the fact you could actually listen to him, after all. "Ya still cold?"

You nodded. "A little. But I have this." You tugged at his vest, smirking a bit.

The next few minutes passed slowly, his hand touching your arm every now and then before retreating like he didn’t trust himself and thinking he might do something wrong.

You weren’t sure what made you do it, but something in his touch—or lack of it—had you leaning into him. But when you moved to sit sideways on his lap out of nowhere, his whole body stiffened like he’d just stepped into a trap, even though he didn’t push you away.

"Sharing warmth," you signed with an innocent tilt of your head, but you could feel the heat rising in your cheeks.

Daryl flinched beneath you, his hands moving around like he couldn’t decide where they were supposed to go, but one finally moved near your hips.

You smiled at his reaction. "It’s okay if you don’t know what to do. I don’t, either. Believe me."

That seemed to take some of the nervousness away from him. "Ain’t that the truth? World’s gone to shit, and here we are, tryin’ to figure out how to… y’know." He gestured vaguely in front of your face.

"Be human?" You signed back, your hands moving slowly and thoughtfully.

"Yeah," he responded. "S’pose we’re doin’ fine, though. Least, I think we are."

You tilted your head to the side to look at him in the faint moonlight. He looked… softer like this. As if he was opening up in a way you never saw, and it made your heart race.

His hands brushed along your shoulder in a quick, almost hesitant motion before he brought them up again. "Ya good now? Feelin' better n' warmer?"

"Yes, I feel good," you signed, your hands moving slowly as if the moment might be destroyed if you rushed. "You make me feel… safe."

Daryl's Adam's apple bobbed hard as he swallowed, and for a moment, you thought he might push you away for sure. Instead, he just pulled you a little closer, his chin resting lightly on your shoulder.

"Safe’s good," he mumbled to himself. "Safe’s good. 'N stars ain’t got nothin’ on feelin' safe."

"But I still think it's strange how small we are," you signed further, your fingers lingering in the air like a painter in front of their work. "How small one can feel in this world."

"Y’ain’t small," he answered with his hands in front of your face again. "Ain’t like we’re jus', dunno… some kinda insect out here. Maybe this world’s gone to hell, but yer… bigger’n that, I guess."

You smiled, your fingers moving quickly. "And you’re not exactly a philosopher, Daryl Dixon."

He snorted at that, shaking his head. "Yeah, well… don’ needa be. 'S jus' the truth."

You shivered again, the cold breeze leaving goosebumps on your skin, and his eyes narrowed as he noticed.

"And ya still freezin'," he signed, almost accusingly, as if you hadn’t already borrowed his vest. You tilted your head, your face making it clear that the wind wasn't the only thing making you tremble.

Daryl shifted a bit, pulling his vest more tightly around your shoulders. His hands grabbed the edges of it, tugging it so it covered your chest better. His mouth opened like he wanted to say something, but instead, he exhaled sharply through his nose before he looked down, one of his hands twitching before moving to touch your knee.

"Damn wind," Daryl mumbled. "Can’t believe ya let it get ya like this..."

The way he said it wasn’t angry. It sounded more frustrated, like he blamed himself more than anything else as his thumb brushed over your knee, his fingers digging into your pants just enough to make your pulse quicken.

"Shit," he growled quietly, his other hand soon moving to grab your hips as if he were trying to ground himself before he leaned his head in closer. His nose touched your temple and went lower, brushing along your jawline. But Daryl didn't stop there; his lips pressed gently against your pulse point, staying there as if he wanted to remember the feel of your skin against himself all of a sudden.

"Smellin' so good… like somethin’ I don’ deserve," he whispered to himself as his hand tightened on your hips."Too close… Too close…" he growled, but his grip didn’t loosen.

Instead, he pulled you in, but only just enough, like he didn’t trust himself to go any further. "Can’t… Can’t be that close. Shouldn' be."

The muscles in his arm were twitching as if he were afraid you might slip away—afraid that if he let go, you'd disappear. He was trying to memorize it—to memorize you—trying to hold on without breaking anything inside himself.

"Why ya makin' me… feel like that?"

And then—without any warning—his tongue was dragging itself across your throat. It was slow as if he couldn’t get enough, and the feeling was almost overwhelming, like he was marking you with every slide of his tongue, each lick a little longer than the last.

His hand slid further up your back, his fingers digging into his vest around your body as if trying to pull you even closer, but his mouth never left your neck. He growled, and when he got to the curve of your jaw, he couldn’t resist—his teeth scraped against your skin, just enough to make you shiver.

"Fuckin’ hell," he growled again, but his lips never stopped moving over your skin. It was as if he needed to feel you against him, closer than close, just to make sure you were really there.

"Goddamn…" Daryl's voice cracked slightly, and you swore you felt his whole body trembling even more as he pressed closer, burying his face in the crook of your now slightly wet neck.

You wanted to sign something to him, anything, but the way his lips then moved along the curve of your neck instead of his tongue stole the thoughts right out of your mind. His nose nudged closer, and you could swear you felt him inhale deeply, his stubble brushing softly against your skin.

It was tender like a breeze but rough as a storm—the kind of closeness that set your nerves on fire and each cell ablaze.

Daryl leaned back slightly, letting you sit more fully in his lap, and the quiet groan that came out of his mouth when you adjusted your weight made your heart race and sent it into overdrive. His forehead came to rest against your cheek for a moment, his breathing uneven as if he was about to melt, his eyes half-lidded as they took you in.

His hands felt as if they were everywhere—on your back, your hips, your face—but you couldn’t focus on anything except the way he was looking at you like he was starving.

Before you could even react, Daryl's teeth sank into your shoulder, hard enough to make you wince at the soft pain, but not enough to hurt you. His mouth followed the mark he made, soothing it with his tongue before, gentle and wordlessly, his lips found your cheek.

It was slow at first, almost shy when he nudged you with his nose several times, pressing quick kisses to your cheek. But when you didn't pull away, he deepened it, his lips kissing your face with some kind of desperation that’s been building for far too long.

His fingers tangled in your hair, keeping you close to him, while his other hand still held on to your knees, holding you close enough to feel every shudder of his breath before burying his face against you again.

"Need ya…" He growled quiet and roughly against your throat, his voice hoarse, like he was trying to communicate through his actions rather than words, as if he couldn’t control himself anymore.

You leaned into him, your fingers grabbing and holding onto his shirt as he kissed his way back up to the corner of your mouth.

"Don’ lemme stop… 'cause I ain’t sure I can," he whispered, his voice soft and his eyes closed like he was trying to shut out the world and focus on the feeling of you being so close.

You could feel the way he was fighting himself, like there was a battle going on somewhere deep inside of him. It was like he was waiting for some sort of permission—while waiting to see if you’d still push him away.

You reached up, your fingers gently touching his chin, then moving down to his neck, feeling the shiver of his body beneath your touch. You didn’t rush, didn’t try to close the distance too fast. You just let the silence take a hold of time, letting him process, letting him come to terms with whatever was going on in his head.

When you finally moved, it wasn’t forceful or harsh. You tilted your head slightly, your lips brushing against the corner of his mouth. He froze—completely still, like the whole world had stopped.

It wasn’t the shock kind of freeze. It wasn’t fear, or panic. It was the kind that came when someone was trying to hold on to something which could break at any time, unsure if they should let go of the fragile moment. And Daryl was still fighting, still unsure. But when you didn’t pull back, when you stayed close, he let himself relax.

The kiss was slow, hesitant at first. His lips barely pressed against yours, as if testing. But then, when you didn’t pull away, he kissed you a little deeper, a little more sure. It wasn’t fast. It wasn’t rushed. It was gentle—sweet, like he was giving you all the time in the world to back away if you wanted to.

But you didn’t.

When you pulled back, his eyes looked into yours—wide, almost like he couldn’t believe it had happened. "Uh… I, uh…" He stammered, while caught somewhere between disbelief and relief.

Neither of you signed a word, and for the first time in a while, you felt like maybe, just maybe, the world wasn’t such a lonely and dark place after all.

Daryl soon broke the silence, speaking more to himself than to you as he looked up at the sky. "New blood in an old place…"

You stopped breathing for a moment, your heart skipping a beat as you listened to him. It wasn’t a question, just a statement—a realization like the stars had aligned at that very moment.

New blood in an old place.

It could have meant many things, but as you let it sink in, you realized it’s his way of talking about you—about the way you’ve come into this world, this place. You were different from the ones who’ve weathered here, those who’ve learned how to survive in the rain.

Maybe you were a spark—untouched by the bitterness of a storm cloud that never really went away until now. At least… for him. It was like Daryl was seeing you in a different light that shined brighter like the stars in the night.

You leaned in slightly, a little nervous, but you finally spoke—really spoke. "Maybe it's not about being new. Maybe it's just about finding somewhere that feels… like it could be home."

Daryl’s eyes went wide. He stared at you as if he hadn’t fully processed the fact that you’d spoken—that you had actually spoken.

For a moment, he just stared at you, his lips parted in shock. "Did ya jus'—" He stammered, his voice cracking slightly. "Yer… talkin’?"

You could feel the way his hands trembled, his eyes staring at you like he was afraid to blink.

"Say my name," he demanded, cupping your face and looking into your eyes. "Say… my name."

You hesitated, your stopping for a second before the word came out nervously. "Daryl..."

"Say it again," he whispered, his voice trembling with something you couldn’t quite understand. "Jus'... say it again."

You swallowed hard, the sound of your own voice feeling not so foreign anymore with his name on your lips. "Daryl."

He didn’t say anything further. He just held you, now both his arms wrapped around you like he needed to keep you there to believe it was real.

And then, in that same instant, he leaned forward, one hand grabbing your chin, but this time with a bit more force. His lips found yours again, rougher this time, but still full of that same sweetness, like he was trying to devour you. His tongue slipped into your mouth—not slowly, not careful, just all-consuming.

It was a warning, as if he was reminding you—he wasn’t letting you go—he was marking you, claiming you. It was a kiss that spoke for him without saying any words at all, a kiss that told you that you weren’t just new blood anymore—you were a part of this place, and of him.

The world still seemed dark around you, but with him at your side and bright stars up in the sky, it didn’t seem quite as impossible to face those shadows anymore.

You were new blood—but you were home.

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ's ɴᴏᴛᴇ: An attempt at writing fluff, I guess. And honestly, I’m not sure how I feel about it. If some parts and scenes feel a little repetitive, that’s me trying to slowly build intimacy because I didn’t want to rush anything.

TAG-LIST: @itwasntaphasema @ch3r0k33-r0s3

[ianwaite]

How sweet, yes I indirectly do, so what? IF your best was ever a Snafender and became after reading the original hp books properly a Snater, then your best friend shall prove it. Otherwise I don't believe your friend.

Cause both blocked me now:

Your answer (the indented text) has shown me that you have never dealt intensively with "snafending", if at all.

Yknow-you can hate someone and still find them interesting at the same time

I do not hate. Hate is very strong, childish emotion. I dislike, f.e. Dumbledore to leave Harry blind for a whole year and forced Sev to kill him.

I am aware of what they bring to the story, they're very interesting and I'm glad they add what they do to the story-and I still hate em.

If ya hate them, you should hate Lupin, Black, Voldemort etc even more.

Snape bullied children.

You didn't read the link, sad.

He bullied Neville so much he became the kid's Boggart. Boggarts show a persons worst fear.

Then Hermione fears McGonagall.. you don't hate her, no? The boggart argument is no argument to allow yourself to hate Sev. If you use it, you should hate ALL the things/livings that became boggarts to the children in HP/that scene.

At the time a infamous killer was supposedly on the lose, and his worst fear was his teacher.

And Hermione's was McGonagall and Ron's was a spider and ...

He didn't care about anything else except for Lily-He called her a slur though. And people wonder why she ditched him.

I do not wonder about it. I dislike her, cause she was no true friend. She wanted to get rid of Sev after she no longer had any use for him.

He told Voldemort to kill James and Harry but not Lily. He told Voldemort to kill a newborn.

What? He didn't told Voldy this. Voldy told him, he will kill them all! You switch POVs here. How could Sev in his position beg for the child that is THE enemy of his Master? Voldy would have Avadad him immediately, the Potters after that and what story would we have had then? You never were a Snafender - otherwise you would not have come to such unlogical conclusion.

You're saying this like I don't acknowledge the good things he's done. Again since they were influential to the series I kinda have to. But to overlook all the bad? Yeah not happening. I've dealt with my fair share of emotionally abusive teachers for that to happen. I've dealt with my share of emotional abuse.

And to copy your own experience on Sev is correct? He is not your teacher and he never will! If he reminds you of your teacher, he helped you to see their abusive behavior and that helped you - I bet - to think it over. Their abusive behavior was their fault, never yours and I bet, they had their personal reasons too and those had nothing to do with you personally ... like Sev had - no trauma help, no education how to teach, no supportive love of his parents (as far as we know) and the wrong peer group (DE) - he had to fit in to stay a spy.

Harry did think it over and named his kid after Sev, and you think his parents wouldn't have allowed that? Why do you think Harry named his kid after Sev?

Cause all his "emotional abuse" was only Harry's POV. Seeing Sev's memories opened his eyes, seeing Sevs POV made it clear to Harry that Sev only had to be this way and could not become differently - he had to be the spy, to fulfill his promise, to keep Harry protected. If Sev would had been kind to Harry (THE enemy of DEs) - not emotional abusive - would he had been an accepted DE? No.

You're assuming quite a bit about me. I've read the Harry Potter books a dozen times over. There what got me into reading in the first place.

Read them again in 5 years and the link completely, please.

I am not a senseless hater. I am not senseless. I need reasons for my hate. I need proof. And I have it.

That's why I changed my outlook on him. You have proof to 'love', I have to 'hate'.

Your proof is no proof to me, cause it his based on Snaters POV not on neutral human POV.

Let's go on our separate ways. Where either you block me or I block you. Or you just get off my blog. Love with the people who love with you. Leave me be.

Ok. Sadly you decided over my head. I use an old trick now ... I am sorry, but I feel the need to do so.

I will use the anti snape tag. I'll still get interaction. I already have by fellow 'Snaters' I mean have you seen the likes and reblogs?

Oh really? No, didn't see it. I am sorry. Yeah some of us Snovers can be very ... rude.

I still don't believe you were once a Snafender and became a Snater after reading the books properly ... properly reading btw means that you read sth from a neutral -meta- POV. You have to accept ALL in the text at first without judging it (morally) and find out why it's written this way and not the other way. Most readers read a text from their personal POV. That's why we have many -mostly young- Snaters and still some Snafenders.

I hope you are alright and are old enough to not take this and the internet in common too personal.

I wish you all you need.

RIP James and Lily Potter you would've never let Harry name his kid 'Albus Severus' Potter

[apricot-blossomss]

Hi, I love your writings a lot. I have another Apollo idea don’t know if you like it but I wanna share it: So, Reader is a deeply devoted follower of Apollo; loyal, loving, kind and compassionate but very insecure, has many self-deprecating thoughts, still, very determined to learn something in his honour. So, she tries to learn the lyre but she is bad in it not talented at all. She is determined though and willing to sacrifice time and effort into practice.

I imagine this plays out in Ancient Greece, the reader is very poor but determined to learn it and then to try her best on the Pythian Games. Apollo is already so smitten with her; he follows her journey from far but doesn’t wanna bless her bc he wants her to success on her own. One night he shows up to her while she’s praying. First, she is afraid he is here to take away her lyre as she is not worthy of it but instead, he is super kind and supportive tells her this effort and hard work is far greater and more meaningful sacrifice than any of the treasures the kings offer to him.

So, he offers her to be her teacher from now on as she can’t afford a good teacher like the others. They have romantic moments, kisses as he continues to teach her. Of course she wins the Games, he has taught her things no human knows about the lyre. At the end of the Games, he shows up to the people and in front of everyone he offers her to go with him and play with the Muses.

This is long I know, so, please do with it whatever you want. Use parts of it if it is too long, I just wanted to share it with someone.

☛ apollo teaching mortal! fem! reader to play the lyre

☛ sfw; fluff; cw: self-doubt, stage fright; not proofread oops

"Just stop already!"

"Why do you keep trying?"

"You have no talent."

It wasn't like you didn't know they were right. A lack of self-awareness is wasn't the problem for you. It was, however, the unexplainable love you felt for the instrument in your hands. It washed out of the gentle wood of the olive tree- you heard that the high lords and ladies sometimes owned gilded or golden lyres, which you could hardly imagine. And it was your most prized possession.

You had given a lot to be able to afford it, since your family wasn't ready to pay for a endeavor as fruitless as your attempts to learn to play it. At night, you dreamt of being able to elicit beautiful tunes out of the instrument, but during the day, reality hit you like a hammer in the head as you awkwardly plucked the strings, sounding more like a dying cat than the musician you dreamed of becoming.

It wasn't fair, you thought, in moments were your frustration overwhelmed you. It wasn't fair that some people had such talent that they could effortlessly handle the instrument while someone as in love with the art of it as you struggled without seeing any results. Many times, you had prayed to Apollo, but the god had never blessed your attempts and by now, you figured it might be some sort of subliminal messaging.

But you didn't care. Well, you did, but none of it could deter you. No matter how many people shook their heads or laughed or told you to stop, you sat down for hours on end, trying to figure out the beautiful instrument. When you walked on the market or the town square, you would stop at street musicians demonstrating their craft, watching their fingers, trying to learn, but you never managed to replicate it.

Your family wanted you to learn some other craft to attract suitors and impress them, but you would not relent. You would practice, you would watch, you would pray. All in the hopes of getting the hang of the lyre someday. And no matter how many times you failed or screamed at your fingers to just do it right, resting them on top of the strings and running them along them always calmed you.

Carefully, you let your hands run up and down, simply tugging one string after the other. And somehow, you still managed to mess it up. It sounded stale and squeaky, no matter how much you tried to soften your movements. Not willing to let that deter you, you tried to play a melody you had heard one off the street musicians play yesterday on the market.

Unbeknownst to you, you had an audience you couldn't have dreamed of. Way above, golden eyes followed the movement of your fingers, listening intently, intrigued. Forearms leaned on the railing of his balcony, he had been watching you practice frequently over the course of the last months. In the beginning , it had been for his amusement. Now, it had become a part of his routine to see how you were doing.

"Brother!"

Apollo looked up from the sight of you practicing in your room to find Hermes sitting on the railing. After a short, distracted greeting, his eyes wandered down once more, as if they were attracted by a magnetic force. And, truly, you were magnetizing. Your unrelenting determination, your love for his holy instrument, the fact that you had set yourself a goal and were working so hard towards it: competing in his Pythian games.

"So, what's got you this distracted lately?" Hermes asked, letting his legs dangle. When he was denied an answer, his attentive eyes followed Apollo's gaze and found you. "Oh, so that's-"

Apollo hushed him to listen to your best efforts, a small smile gracing his lips when he realized with what care you had listened to the mysterious lyre player on the street yesterday that had conveniently played a song more fit for beginners to pick up on.

"Wow, that sounds bad," Hermes exclaimed, whistling under his breath. Curling over in laughter, he missed the pointed stare by his brother. "Planning on punishing her or why are you enduring this?"

"Shut your mouth, brother," Apollo shot back and the sharpness of his tone surprised Hermes. As he looked down once more, he watched Apollos face soften visibly as you stubbornly plucked at your strings. A small smile graced his lips and he propped his head up on his arms as he watched you intently. "She can do it, she just needs a little bit of help."

☀️

Taking a deep breath, your knees met the hard stone floor and you kneeled before Apollo's altar, bowing your head until your hair formed a curtain around your face. After all the unanswered prayers and fruitless attempts, you were still filled with admiration and wonder looking at his statue. Closing your eyes, your lips formed a hushed prayer, as every afternoon in his temple. One that always went unanswered, but if you were one thing, it was persistent.

But today, something was different. Your mind couldn't help but wonder to the humiliating exchange you had had with your mother this morning. Scoffing over your clumsy playing, she had laughed at you, telling you to the face to no longer make her and the world suffer the sound of your lyre play, that you were dishonoring Apollo himself by eliciting such horrid sounds from his holy instrument.

You couldn't help the tremble of your lip, nor the traitorous stinging of your eyes and took a long breath to calm yourself. "Great lord Apollo," you whispered into the ground, your voice laced with shame and doubt, "Please, if you wish for me to stop my attempts, if I am dishonoring you, if I am angering you, give me a sign!"

"Well, hello there."

You shot around, finding yourself face to face with a blond man in a simple but fine tunic and piercing eyes. Eyes that you knew, because you knew this man, and you had spent a full hour watching his fingers handle the lyre so gracefully. It was one of the street artists you had seen on the market, more specifically, the one you had spent your forenoon studying. Was this a divine sign or a simple coincidence?

Realizing that you still hadn't answered the greeting, you scrambled to your feet clumsily and bowed lightly, since you saw first-glance he was of higher social rank than you. Granted, the majority of people was of higher rank than you, but your eyes had picked up on the gold laced into his tunic, his jewelry and most importantly, the intricate craftsmanship of his lyre. Hidden give-aways of a wealthy pocket. "Excuse me," you said softly, smiling while bowing once more, "I'll be leaving." A musician as skilled as him was far more deserving of this temple's glory.

Hurrying past him, the sound of his voice had you stop dead in your tracks. "Do you know what talent is, m'lady?"

Several things in that sentence made you pause and turn around once more, finding the man already looking at you with those magnetic eyes. "I'm not a lady, m'lord," you said abashedly, but his smile only widened. "Sure you are. And you know the answer to my question, don't you?"

"Yes," you answered, wondering what he could possibly want out of this conversation. "It's a gift by the gods that they give to the deserving." The young man hummed with a smile on his lips. "I couldn't help but notice you look a little troubled. What did you entrust your god with, sweet lady?"

If it had been any other man, you would have retreated, excused yourself, exited the temple as fast as possible. But he radiated a feeling of safety and grace that you couldn't help but feel attracted to him, and not just in the physical sense. Even though you had no idea why a man like that would spare a girl like you just a glance. Maybe he was one of those men who took advantage of poor girls like you, but somehow, your gut told you that you could trust him.

"I-," you hesitated, but then, the words broke out of you like a waterfall as you told him about your troubles. Maybe it was because no one listened to you, ever, but you trusted this man with everything. "It sounds horrible," you ended your ramblings, trying to conceal your damp eyes. "Everyone keeps telling me to stop trying, but I want to learn. But, what if I'm disgracing god Apollo himself with how horrible I am?"

"You aren't," the man said with an enigmatic smile and you wrung your hands. "You haven't heard me play, I'm atrocious!"

"Hey," he answered soothingly, taking a step towards you. "You aren't. You just need a teacher. I could teach you," he offered kindly, but you shook your head in protest. "No, m'lord, I have no means to afford it. See, I am a poor woman, I don't have any money of my own and my family would never come up for it. I don't have the financial means to compensate you."

His smile only widened and looking up at him, it left you quite breathless. You couldn't explain it, but there was something about it that made you feel as if warmed up by the sun itself. This man had to be blessed by Apollo. "I don't ask for compensation. I'd give you lessons for free."

Now, that was really suspicious. You weren't stupid, there was a good chance this was a ploy to take advantage of you in some way, because the offer sounded too good to be true. Such a talented artist simply stumbling over you in a temple and offering free lessons? At the same time, you were also desperate. And this man was really talented. If he was being genuine, were you throwing out the opportunity of your life? After a short silence, you looked back up at him. "Why would you do that? Offer to teach me for free, I mean."

A sudden breeze disheveled the man's golden locks, his charming smile unwavering. "Ah, you see... It's because I'm Apollo." Because you had any chance to register the words, the light seemed to explode before your eyes and a reflex brought your hand up to shield them. When you removed it, the man had changed. His robes were of pure gold, as were his shoes, equally golden marks extended over his body like tattoos and his hair was crowned by a shining halo. You were looking at divinity, and it was nearly scorching your eyes.

Shit.

Thankfully, your body showed an above average response time as you dropped to your knees so fast they met the stone floor in a way that had a sharp pain shoot up your legs. The thrumming of your racing heart was louder than any thought you might have had. Bowing down so far you were covering before the god, you pressed your forehead into the marble and raised your hands in a pleading fashion. "Forgive me, great lord Apollo, for dishonoring you by attempting so many times to learn your holy instrument when you had clearly not blessed my endeavors. Please, punish me to any extent you see fit but have mercy on-"

The god interrupted your terrified rambling by placing a hand on your shoulder, rendering you speechless just as effectively as a slap in the face might have. When he spoke your name, you looked up at him tentatively. Looking at Apollo was like looking at the sun itself, and if the man had been handsome before, in this form, he was the most beautiful thing you had ever laid your mortal eyes on.

"Loving the lyre as much as you do is not dishonoring me," the god said and his voice was so smooth and beautiful it wiped your head clean of thought. "Quite the opposite, actually. Your dedication to my instrument is admirable. Hence the reason my offer is still awaiting an answer."

"But-" you squeaked in response and tried suppress the trembling of your nervously wringing hands. "Why would you do that? Why would you teach me?"

You wouldn't get an answer to that question for some time, but it didn't need a lot of convincing for you to agree to let him be your tutor. To avoid your parent's suspicion, you let him in a grove just outside the city gates where he first taught you the basics, gave you theoretical lessons on the functioning of the lyre and showed you the best way to handle it, which you continuously had problems with. But Apollo was incredibly patient, and your nervousness around him subsided quickly.

Over the course of the next weeks and months, he would show you how to approach the instrument, give you practice and help you improve your lyre play. And after some time, you found yourself looking forward to the lessons not only because of the lessons themselves but for the pleasure of his company. You couldn't deny that Apollo's charming wits had done a number on you, and the way you were ogling his hands as he so masterfully demonstrated it in his instrument would have been shameless if it hadn't been for educational purposes (along others).

There were moments when you yourself wondered if the god may reciprocate your romantic interest, as silly as that thought was. The way he lightened up seeing you approach him, the way he was always waiting for you and the way you caught him glancing at you instead of your lyre from time to time. But you stocked it up to your silly mortal delusions. Why would a god be interested in you?

At the same time, said god found himself falling head over heels for you. He had been smitten with you before meeting you, but being around you, seeing you come out of your shell and starting to feel comfortable around him, showing him your true colors- he was so done for. If he hadn't been his fathers favorite son (he was still working on that favorite child title but Athena was hard to beat) he would have earned a few stern talks by now for slaking off, as he procrastinated or full on ignored divine duties in favor of your lessons.

Your humor and laugh pulled him in, your dedication was unmatched and seeing your eyes light up when you succeeded in something did something to him. A blooming feeling in his chest that consumed his thoughts, sending him into the sweetest daydreams. And it was only fueled every time he got to be with you, be around you, enjoy your company. He tended to get caught up in it, and sometimes you caught him staring at you and he always wondered wether you knew what you did to him with those little glances and witty comments of yours.

Nothing excited you more than the progress you were starting to make. The strings were no longer squeaky and you had even managed to play some easy melodies that got more complex as time went on. You were astonished by your own progress, which was of course thanks to the fact that you had the best teacher anyone could dream of, but also hours upon hours of sleepless nights, practicing diligently.

When Apollo found out about those, he was surprisingly worried and you couldn't help but be giddy that he cared. But you listened and got your sleep that he insisted on, if only fleckig praise, seeing the showdowns under your eyes disappear. Also, you were convinced his presence in your life was some sort of good-luck-charm, because there had been no fourth year old suitors asking for your hand in marriage ever since you were a few weeks into your lessons.

But your strumming technique still wasn't as smooth as could be. "You need to feel the music flow through your fingers," Apollo told you, making it look criminally easy as he demonstrated it. "They need to move with the music, as smooth as the music. You are tugging, but you need to caress." His eyes met yours in a silent request to try it for yourselves.

Touched stuck in between your teeth, you tried to imagine the music flowing into your body down to your fingertips, trying to move them naturally along the strings. But still, it didn't sound quite right. To your surprise, Apollo smiled empathetically and leaned over, covering your small hand with his larger one and mimicking the correct movement.

You tried to concentrate, you really did, but it was hard when Apollo sat closer to you on the grass, settling behind you so that his arms almost caged you in, his breath fanning over your neck. Luckily, he couldn't see the redness on your cheeks like this. "Relax," he told you and a light chuckle left his lips. "Are you still scared of me, sunshine?"

Sunshine. It was his nickname for you, and the way he said it made it sound like a melody in itself. "I'm not," you answered truthfully, letting him gently guide your movements. "But I don't think you realize what divine proximity does to a mortal."

Because of your proximity, you felt his head shift as his gaze wandered to you. You didn't return it, because you knew you would get lost in it if you did. "What does it do to you?" the god asked in a hushed voice, and the teasing undertone had your lips twitch. "It feels weird when you touch me," you explained, your fingers taking a little more initiative in running over the strings. "Like you're too real and not at all at the same time. I can't really explain it, but it's like touching raw might. That would feel weird, right?"

"You always manage to surprise me, sunshine," Apollo said and you could hear the smile in his voice. "It looks like there is a poet in you." He let go of you, letting your fingers act on their own and it sounded much better than before. Nothing the difference, you smiled triumphantly. "Don't flatter me, I might get too much of the hubris, m'lord."

"It isn't hubris when it's true," his voice spoke softly as you started to play the tune from before. It sounded much more graceful now and Apollo's adoring gaze, hidden from your view, traced the movement of your fingers, up your arms to your face. When your fingers had become more sure, you turned to him, no doubt with a smart reply on the tip of your tongue, but you fell silent when you found yourself mere breaths away from the god, who seemed just as taken aback by the sudden proximity.

But he didn't pull away, and neither did you. Fingers slowing down, you couldn't rip your eyes away from the mesmerizing gold of his eyes. Apollo smelled of honey and flowers, a smell so sweet it made sense paired with his smile. Though he wasn't smiling now. His lips were parted lightly as he stared at you just as intensely as you watched him.

Slowly but steadily, the tension in the tight little space between you two got too much for you. Your breathing picked up and you had to avert your eyes when his fell down onto your heaving chest and snapped back up at yours with a new hunger. Coughing under your breath, you moved away from him by a few inches, trying to hide how flustered you were. But if you had turned around, you would have caught a rare sight: the god of music looking at you with heart eyes, his cheeks painted by a pink hue.

Little moments like these only pulled you in deeper. Embarrassingly, you had begun dreaming of Apollo, about his smile, his lyre-play, his voice. It was the most prevalent in your dreams, as if he was singing you a lullaby every night. You found yourself thinking about him every time of the day, getting caught up in vivid daydreams as you completed your chores, feeling as though he was with you every time you practiced.

Though that may have not been an entirely unfounded feeling. Sometimes, Apollo would say things during your lessons that had you suspect he was listening in on you practicing- at least sometimes. Why he occupied himself with something he could have so often, you didn't know. But you did feel honored.

Progress was coming, you were getting better, though there were also setbacks. As before, you didn't have natural talent, and sometimes you struggled to a point of frustration that had your movements grow sloppy and disjointed, gnawing on your bottom lip in dissatisfaction. "Hey." You looked up at Apollo who had picked up on your growing annoyance and sighed. "Sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry about," he answered, gently prying the instrument from your hands. "I think you could use a break." And before you could protest, he added: "How about I play something just for you for a change?" Now, that shut you up real quick and you let him put your lyre aside. Apollo would demonstrate bits of songs or movements for you, but never whole songs, and the prospect of witnessing the god perform one made you giddy with excitement.

Under your curious gaze, Apollo propped up his instrument with great flair and began playing. The melody was unlike anything you had heard before. It was so interacted and beautiful, so masterfully crafted it brought tears to your eyes as you sat there and listened. But none of it could have prepared you for when Apollo started to sing. You had to close your eyes, because looking at him and listening to his singing at the same time was simply too much. You were pretty sure you could get addicted to the sound of his singing.

Apollo sing of pine trees, of secret meetings, of soft lyre tunes, the sounds of two instruments mingling. It was that last part that had you perk up. Could it be? Your grove who dusted of pine trees, you met him in secret- was he singing a sound about your lessons? Or were you just being delusional, thinking the god apollo would write a song- about you. Because now, he was singing about a girl under the pine trees with a lyre. Your heart was thrumming loudly in your chest, and it was the only sound resonating in your ears when Apollo ended the song.

You had to work up the strength to open your eyes, and when you did, he was watching you already, his eyes boring themselves into yours. With the melody still filling your head, you reached for your lyre, but Apollo didn't even register your movement. All he could see was you, as he desperately tried to gauge your reaction. Did you like the song? You had to, he had poured his heart into it. But he would write more. His heart was overflowing with memories as he watched the concentrated furrow of your brows.

And then, you started playing the song.

At once, Apollo snapped out of his trance as his insides roared with another form of adoration. You were playing his song, your song, the song he had written just for you. As if you were answering him. Sure, it sounded a little hesitant, but he was surprised about how masterful it sounded. You had become an expert player, in spite of your setbacks. And it looked like you had the same realization, because you looked up from the instrument and up at him with a glowing expression that said 'I did it!' and he could only nod in astonishment.

As the date of the Pythian games grew closer, so did Apollo and you, developing your inside jokes and becoming more comfortable with physical affection. It was safe to say you were friends with a god, which was something you could have never dreamed about. But as the date approached, your nerves were a little- tense, so to speak.

You cursed when suddenly, something snapped and a string of the lyre broke off, flinging your hand and marking it with a long red line. "Ow," you exclaimed and immediately, Apollo was all over you, taking your hurting hand into his. "Can you fix the string?" you asked nervously and earned a raised eyebrow from Apollo. "What do you think? And your hand is the priority here, sunshine."

"Right," you nodded, nibbling on your lip. "I need it to perform well." A long sigh left the gods lips as they ghosted over the palm of your hand. You jumped when they pressed down on your sore skin and an unfamiliar sensation, a warm prickling, emerged from the spot where he had bestowed a kiss upon you, rushing to your tummy where it exploded into a million golden butterflies, rummaging against your ribcage.

"Sunshine?"

"Huh?" you said, startled, and he showed you your hand, completely untouched, not a trace of the injury. You turned it around as if you were to find the mark, but it had vanished completely. "Thank you!" you smiled, picking up the lyre and holding it to his chest. "Now the string!"

Apollo sighed once more. Youn knew he could have easily fixed it, but for some reason, he opted to do it manually, pulling a spare string out of his tunic and getting to work removing the broken one. "Why are you doing it like this?" you found yourself asking, watching his graceful fingers as the expertly worked on the lyre.

"If you don't struggle from time to time, what's the point to life?" Apollo asked in a light-hearted tone, though you detected something heavier in the statement.

You hummed, thinking about that. "If you don't struggle, you can't succeed." Apollo looked up at you and nodded before returning his attention to the lyre. "That makes sense," you lamented, watching him intently. "But you don't seem like that kind of god to me." When he raised his brows, you attempted to explain yourself. "Of course, I don't know many gods, I only know you, but you don't seem very... human. You seem very content with being larger than life and divine."

The god hummed, inserting the new string. "You made me realize some things, sunshine. You have struggled so much, and have still persistent. Believe it or not, I think you're much stronger than I am. If I were you, I'd have given up a long time ago, because of what you said precisely: I don't need to struggle as much as you do."

Laughing to yourself, you shook your head in disbelief. "You're right, I don't believe you, but still, thank you. And I didn't know being untouchable could get to you like that."

"Oh, I'm far from untouchable," Apollo reassured you as he handed you back your lyre. "I have been touched and I am touched right now. Do you know why I take so many mortal lovers?" You shook your head and Apollo flopped down on his back, resting his head on his arm as he looked up at the sky above. "I love being touched by you mortals. It's an unimaginable thrill. To be a part of a life that is so fragile and so hardened at the same time is a privilege. Humanity is not a weakness but an unimaginable strength."

When he closed his eyes, yours were free to roam his resting body undetected, running over his golden marks and getting caught up on his face, as always. "I always thought... the fact that I had to struggle so much was because I was weak."

Apollo opened his eyes to look at you, and they were so heavy with emotion you had to avert yours. "Weak? Sunshine, you are so strong."

☀️

Delphi was an unsurprisingly beautiful city. As your travel companion, Apollo had disguised himself as a mortal once more and escorted you safely there, even arranging for your stay. During the religious ceremonies in his honor, he had been giggling in your ear in a way that had some priests give him pointed stares for interrupting the process and you jabbing your elbow into his side, making him whine at you being mean.

Then came the actual contest. The other performances flew by you as you had a hard time concealing your nerves, but Apollos calling presence helped. His hand squeezed you every once in a while, and when it was nearly your turn, he guided you to a spot next to the arena from which the performers entered the stage. His bigger hands engulfed your shaking once as he pressed them to his chest. You were surprised to find his heart drumming in a high frequency and widened your eyes at him.

"I can't help it, I'm nervous, too," he smiled cheekily and you bit down on your bottom lip. "Well, it's not you who is about to perform in front of hundreds of people. What if I mess up? What if I'm bad? I don't even have any real talent."

"Do you remember our first conversation?" the god interrupted your ramblings, pulling you closer to him. When you shook your head, he smiled softly and stuck a strand of hair behind your ear. "You said that you mortals get your talents from us gods. Well, it's true. I didn't bless you with talent. Do you know why?" You shook your head and he continued.

"Because you tried anyway, and you would not give up. Because of the devotion and love you hold for the lyre. You fought and you struggled, and you made great progress, without any advantages. I never answered your prayers I didn't want you to lose that. You are greater than any of the other artists assembled because of it. I have rarely seen such determination. And I knew you could do it." The god took a long breath. "And it was what made me start to fall in love with you."

Your head snapped up once you processed the words. "You... what?" Apollo delayed the answer by bringing your hands up to his lips and kissing each of your fingertips, making a warmth flood through them that ended their shaking. "I love you. So much. If that song wasn't enough to tell you."

"So it was for me?" you asked, mesmerized, deaf to the announcement of your name. Apollo smiled down at you, leaning in to kiss your temple, your cheek, and finally, his lips met yours. As if they had been waiting for it all along, your arms flew up to wrap themselves around his neck, pulling him closer as his hands dug into your sides.

Suddenly, you felt something on the top of your head and broke from the kiss to feel it. It was a laurel wreath. It was Apollo's laurel wreath. Your eyes were as wide as plates, you were sure, and Apollo chuckled, pointing to it with his chin. "You have my favor, sunshine. Now go and show them what real prowess is."

When you stepped onto the stage, you were overwhelmed by the cheers of the audience. As it was tradition, you recounted a prayer to Apollo, who you spotted in the front row, holding onto your lyre like your lifeline. Then, the crowd fell silence and it was your turn to play.

☀️

In retrospect, you could have anticipated it, as you knew things about the lyre no other mortal could know, thanks to Apollo. But it still blew you away when the pronounced winner of the Pythian games was you. As if in a trance, your ears drowned out the cheers of the audience as you kneeled before the priest who placed the winner's laurel wreath- you had taken off Apollo's, of course - on your head, congratulating you on your outstanding performance.

But even as you barely registered the noise of the crowd, it did catch your attention when it suddenly subsided at once, giving away to a deadly silence. The priest gasped, he was the first one to fall to his knees. Because at the top of the arena's stairs stood Apollo in all his glory, emitting pure power and might. When he met your eye, he winked at you.

As Apollo walked down the stairs, all of the spectators covered, falling to their knees and throwing themselves at his feet. But Apollo didn't take notice of them, his eyes were locked on you as he approached you. A tugging at your skirt made you look down, where the priest made a motion, urging you to kneel as well. When Apollo spoke, his voice filled the whole arena.

"This woman will kneel for no one." His smile was so radiant it took your breath away. So magnetizing you almost missed the hand he was stretching out, waiting for you to take it. Apollo called your name. "I shall invite you to put your skill to good use. Take my hand and play with me and the muses, sunshine."

Gasped echoed all around you, but all you could see and hear and feel was him. Without hesitation, you placed your hand in his and it closed firmly around your hand. Urging you closer softly, the god put his free arm around your waist. "Ready to go home, sunshine?"

Your nod was all he needed before he raised you up into the clouds, leaving all bystanders speechless- but not for long. Soon, your story would spread through all of Greece, your name immortalized next to the muses, and held in prayers because it was realized how much more benevolent Apollo was to those who praised your name alongside his.

﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

[d3vdgvrlll]

trauma ig

@gorelvr and anyone else who wanted it

i’ll start from the begining because it’s the one thing that will make my story similar to others. it will have a begining and an end just like anyone else’s. i have been sexually abused since i was seven years old. my cousin joe (obv not his real name i was in israel at the time) he was considerably older than me. 13, not too bad, but at the time it felt like a worlds difference. it didn’t start slowly, not at all, and pieces of it i don’t even remember. i do remember closets tho. it wasn’t just an rape either. he wanted me to like it- either that or he was just sadistic. he would make me smile and beg for it, make me please him as a lover, told me it was right since i was his blood. in fact, he would draw this blood quite often. he would pinch me, beat me, cut me, anything to make me cry, because he had a rule. if i cried, he could come back to use me again. he would do anything to draw out a mere sound of discomfort, anything, any excuse so that he could come into my room at night and violate me. he called me his wife. he called me his girl. and in my native tongue i had to tell him i loved him as well. when i was 9, after two years of this, with no one believing me (and if you ask how it’s possible, youve clearly never heard of arabic jewish culture-) i move to america. i lived in chicago, and suddenly, i was a normal girl. sure, i couldn’t speak english but i was clean. no longer dirty. i was far away from joe and i thought maybe id be far from the pain too. i was far from the bombs that rang in my ears as i walked home, the desolate shelters littered around playgrounds, the constant whisper of “you are never safe” far behind me. i was ahead of everyone else, and when i heard that another one of my childhood friends died of an attack, it didn’t feel better, but at least it wasn’t me. at least it wasn’t me.

this is where i met a friend named lucie. she was the first female friend id ever had. my wonderful grandma, who was like a second mother to me (at the time when she was alive my mother was still kind, the lines on her face less pronounced, her words filled with less poison) signed me up for swimming classes with lucie. after swimming class, me and lucie would shower together. it’s started off because i had conditioner that she needed for her blond hair, conditioner that i was willing to give up to her because she was so much whiter than me, so much purer. she then asked me for favors. to touch her. she’s press me against the wall and kiss me, and when i resisted, she wouldn’t even react. she asked me for more. she said “if you do it well this time, you won’t have to do it again.” and “kiss me for longer this time, you only did two seconds, you promised ten” and each request, no matter how hard it was for me to do, was done. and each time, there came another. no matter how much she promised it’d be the last one, there was always more. i couldn’t get away from it. i was trapped. i was scared, and i wanted her to be my friend. she taught me that if u don’t give people ur body, they won’t stay. she taught me that im worthless besides what i can offer to others. she taught me everything i know and live by, and then she left anyways .

seventh grade- i had a very nice science teacher. i was doing very well in his class. his name i really cannot say because he is still teaching at the school in illinois, and no one has believed me, no matter what i insist happened. we were doing a bridge project. i was failing, because my grandma was dying. she was dying, and she was my everything. watching her- it was the hardest thing i’d ever done. but i couldn’t avert my eyes because it felt sinful. it felt wrong to look away because it was hard to watch- she was my grandma after all, the one who raised me, loved me, showed me the good in the world. so i watched. i watched and stayed with her and read her books she couldn’t hear me reciting while she lay in her hospice bed barely breathing. i wrote down the stories she told me through her tubes, and i tried to imagine that the wires connected to her were flowers instead, that she was somewhere were her grimace was rlly a smile. she stayed alive until my birthday, my 12th birthday, because she didn’t want to ruin it. she stayed alive, in pain, riddled with so much terror, to see me turn 12. one day, i walked into her room and spoke to her, and watching her eyes try to open, her oxygen intake spike up, her stiff limbs try to reach me- it killed me. i love her and always will. it feels awful to group her with this awful man- my science teacher, but in this story they do go together, unlike in real life where my grandma was such a big and powerful woman she always stood alone. or with me. i digress, the man- let’s call him Mr.P- he failed me. i was excelling- frankly, because im very smart and quite good with physics and such, but he still failed me. (shortly after this whole ordeal i was neurologically tested and i have an IQ of 156). i walked into his class one day, and all i can remember is him smiling, saying that he would give me an oppurtunity for extra credit, but that it had to be secret- you can tell where this is going. i had already learned from lucie that nothing is good abt me besides my body, and so when he took mine, the second person to- i could just sit and cry. at least this man let me cry- at least this one didn’t kill my hair to get a reaction, with the promise of hurting me more the less i liked it. i don’t remember much besides my face being pressed against vents on the side of the classroom. i would “wake up” (ptsd) with blood between my thighs, and cuts on my face from the metal on the vents, because of how hard he shoved my face in them. he had a daughter- she was 6 at the time. when i graduated, he told me he’d do the same to her. that was the first time i cut myself. because i knew i couldn’t stop him. i knew that i couldn’t do anything. i knew that what lucid taught me was wrong. my body wasn’t even special- it wasn’t even “worth it”, it was just available.

i moved all over the US, living in austin, chicago, colorado, and florida for the longest times. chicago was my home though, and i know the city like the back of my hand. this is not something many people can say, but i survived being homeless in chicago during the polar vortex. for those who don’t know, the polar vortex is a phenomena that happens every year. winds from the arctic pass through canada and end up in the midwest, chilling the air to roughly -58 degrees F or lower. after my grandma died, my mother became mean. angry. she scared me. she hit me. it’s too much to get into and frankly, i live with her and my dad now and i feel odd talking abt it. it’s my current reality as well, but what i learned from them is that words mean nothing. so i wont spend them here. after a week of being homeless and running to and from school, living in an underpass, someone started walking “home” with me. his name was pat. this is the man i often reference in posts. he was my best friend, not at this time tho. we walked home together for weeks, not speaking a word to each other, until one day i caught an awful case of pneumonia, the second time id fallen ill with it in the month. this time, i couldn’t walk, stand, breathe, or talk. i was passed out when he found me, at least that’s what he told me. he said he carried me to his friends house and that’s were they saved me. his friends name was biscuit, and biscuit ended up being a huge drug dealer. he kept me in his attic- it had a hole in the roof but it was better than dying in the cold. i had already lost my left foot to frostbite- i still can’t feel it but i can walk on it now, which is better than before. in the attic, and idk much abt it because rlly the memory is so hazy- sometimes i wake up in a cold sweat bc im back there, and sometimes idk if im dreaming or if its real- but rlly truly i dont know for sure what happened. all i know is that biscuit used to bring his friends up there, while i was healing (they put tons of drugs in me idek what they used to help me get better but im pretty sure it was a combo of depressants and steroids)- they would pass me around. i just get hazes- visions sort of. i dont even remember. i remeber the feeling of their hands tho, and suddenly feeling a lot colder, feeling the wind on my bare skin. i remember waking up with wind rash and scabs from cigarette burns. i don’t remeber enough o accuse anyone of anything though, so i didn’t mention it to pat. in my head, he didn’t even know. i was wrong ofcourse- he knew. he always knew.

when we got better and went back to our respective homes, we stayed very close. we formed a trauma bond. codependcy. it was wonderful while it lasted, but soon, he started to fall for me. he never raped me, but he did other things. i don’t care to specify at the moment because i fear ive already gone into prolific detail about things i never wanted to think about again. truthfully, i love pat. i do. i hold no hatred towards him, and i really don’t like to talk about all the bad things he did to me, because he was my sweet boy. i never loved him like that- he was just my best friend, but when i speak about him people don’t seem to understand. he understood me, and it’s just. hard to talk about because there’s so much to say. i can’t write it all down in this small part of a bigger story because i have so much to say about him that i’d rather just give it out in pieces. if you see something tagged with #pat or #i miss him, it’s probably about him.

idk what else to say. i’ve been manipulated many times since. used, beat, thrown away. at least pat had the decency to lie to me about it while he did. i’ve never been anyone’s first choice, and i’ve never felt as loved as i did when i had him. he was my best friend, and while this story isn’t about him, it’s hardly about me either. long story short, people used me because they could. i was available. i was around. i used to feel like a victim until i realized im just not special enough to be that. im not special enough to be anything to anyone, and my body wasn’t even “chosen” to be used because its me, it was just convenience. idk. that’s as much as im willing to share. there’s more but - for now this is enough.

[fancyfeathers]

I'm so happy I found your blog I love it. With the new post being one of my favorites, but a line caught my eye. "Tim being the most stalkerish", and usually when one "sibling" does something to the other that other sibling does it back to annoy them. But here's the thing, Daughter read knows Tim probably won't mind it. But maybe to confuse him she starts peeking behind corners at him or in the dark just subtly standing in the corner watching him work to "freak him out"(it never works but still) or he'll hear footsteps behind him, look over his shoulder, and no one be there (he saw daughter reader duck under the table). So yeah in short Daughter Reader stalking Tim back but only to really annoy him because in reality he can't slip up or rest. If he's with Kon he can't use his friendly language or jokes or whatever because Daughter Reader is watching and what if something he says isn't meant for "Kids" (She's like a pre-teen or something in this, maybe thirteen? Or close to that age.) But yeah have a good night/day!:D

Yandere Batfam w/ Wife/Mother!Darling & Daughter/Sister!Darling Masterlist

Oh my goodness Tim would think it’s the cutest thing at first but it gets old quickly.

Like it if she is a preteen in this she had been living at the manor for a few years now, five or six years maybe. It is that point where she is getting older but no one in the house besides her mother and Alfred, the rest of them, Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim, Damian, and even Barbara, Cassandra, Stephanie, and Duke when they meet her, infantilize her. So she’s never treat her like she’s that age, not allowed to do sports because she is far too young and could get hurt, choir has a bunch of older kids and they could be bad influences. At this point she is bored out of her mind at the manor, she can’t go out and do things or have her friends from school over, so she starts trying to annoy her brothers as much as possible…

Jason and Damian were easy, messing with Jason’s gear for Red Hood, he takes out his guns during patrol and-

They are covered with stickers, not exactly intimidating. Then he has to spend an hour trying to peel them all off after patrol.

Then during school she ignores Damian when he is about to drag her off to have lunch with him, but then she she slaps his hand away and rolls her eyes before walking off to have lunch with her friends.

Dick and Tim are a little harder to get on the nerves of…

But her mother said to give them a taste of their own medicine…

She starts get clingy with Dick at the most inconvenient of times, about to go on patrol? She is running around the manor when it’s her bedtime and it’s Dick’s turn to put her in bed. Or he is forcibly cuddling with her on the couch and he gets a call from Babs and he has to wake her up to take her with him because he watching her and she starts whining that she doesn’t want to go.

Then there is Tim whose obsessive tendencies are rather subtle to the blind eyes, but he has folders upon folders, both physical and on his computer, just dedicated to information and photos of Mother!Darling and Sister!Darling. After five or six years of living there she has definitely stumbled upon Tim’s collection at least once, walking into Tim’s room to grab her highlighters she let him borrow and she found the files on his desk and she just took a peak and they were all about her and her mother, photos from magazines that were published long before they came back to Gotham, private records from her mother’s company before it joined Wayne Enterprises, and-

“What are you doing?”

Tim grabs the file from her and shoves it in a drawer and before he could say something to her she had run out of the room, forgetting the highlighters she had came for.

Had he been stalking them since before they returned to Gotham? How long was that? Six, seven years ago maybe?

So when she starts to figure out ways to annoy them, she knows exactly what to do with Tim. She follows him around like a shadow throughout the manor and she knows he knows that she is there, after all he is Red Robin. Tim thinks it’s cute at first, but then eventually things become too much…

Like when he is getting ready for patrol in the Batcave and he sees her hiding behind one of the cases of weapons…

She could have crawled into the batmobile and could have gotten hurt while Bruce was out on patrol. So he is late starting patrol because he has to chase her down around the cave and make sure she doesn’t hurt herself and wrangle her and get her back to bed, making sure to actually lock the door.

Or the time Kon was over and she was ease dropping on their conversation and Tim is ashamed that he did not realize it until dinner that night and everyone is sitting at the table with Kon who is still visiting, and she drops the f-bomb and-

“Young lady, where did you learn that?!”

“Tim said it.”

He is in so much trouble, but Connor is definitely laughing his ass off.

It gets to the point where every single child in the Batfam goes to Bruce and literally begs him to let her do something so she knocks everything off and for the first time he caves, because honestly Bruce cannot deal with her sneaking into the cave one more time while he is working on the batcomputer.

So she is allowed to have friends over, ones that are approve by Bruce first at least with Tim helping run background checks on them first. But of course those unhealthy habits still exist, Dick is still clingy, Jason is still overprotective, Damian is still possessive, and Tim…

Well he just added another polaroid in his folders of his dearest little sister while she was playing soccer in the yard with her friends with their faces scribbled out of course.

[marauder-misprint]

Hii!! I just wanna say, ur writing is genuinely AMAZING. Like, actually tear inducing, feet-kicking, giggling-in-bed kind of amazing. This is my first ever request so bear with me 😔: for your 200 followers celebration (congrats by the way), I was wondering if you could do the prompt 10: “Too good for you? Don’t be ridiculous—they don’t deserve you.” Where reader is in a kinda toxic relationship and Remus, her bestie makes her realize this while also realizing her feelings for him?? Idk if this makes sense I’m sryyy 😭. Totally fine if u don’t feel comfortable doing it, or are to busy! Ignore my ineligible ranting, I for ur I hope ur doing well! Have a good rest of ur day/night!! :)

- 🌅

Thank you!!! This was so much fun to write ♡ Hope you enjoy it

Fireside Conversations

Remus Lupin x fem!Gryffindor!reader

2k words

cw: fluff, toxic relationship

The Gryffindor Common Room was quieter than usual. Which is why everyone there heard your disgruntled groan followed by you basically yelling, “Would you just listen!” as the portrait opened and closed. Peter was shaking his head as he approached the rest of the Marauders where they gathered on the couches by the fire. 

“They are fighting again,” he says as he sits down next to James. He didn’t need to say who. They knew. 

“That’s, what, third time this week?” James asks.

“At least,” Peter responds.

Remus stands up, looking at the portrait hole concerned.

“Moony, don’t,” Sirius says with a warning tone. “She doesn’t want us meddling, remember?”

“I’m not going to meddle,” he says unconvincingly. He wasn’t planning on meddling, rather eavesdropping, which in his defense, you never said he couldn’t do. He found it was easier to comfort you when he knew exactly what the bastard you called your boyfriend did this time. That was why he was going to listen… and to step in or meddle if things got out of hand. 

Remus walks over to the portrait and cracks it open the tiniest bit. He cast a muffling charm behind him so that your voice wouldn’t carry too far into the common room and then hoped you and your boyfriend would be oblivious to the ever-so-slightly open portrait.

“You need to stay away from them,” Remus hears your boyfriend tell you. “They’re using you to get into your pants.”

You scoff. “You’re being ridiculous! I’ve been friends with them since first year, and that’s all we are! We’re friends. Totally platonic. It’s you I like and that’s all that matters!”

“I know you like me. It’s them I don’t trust. So you need to stay away from them.”

“But I trust them. Isn’t that enough?”

“No, it’s really not. I think you’re blinded by them being in Gryffindor with you. You can’t trust everyone in your house, darling.”

“But they’ve earned it.”

“Listen, listen, I’m just worried for you. You spend so much time with them that it feels like you’re putting space between us. I think they’re trying to break us up.”

“They wouldn’t!” you protest. “And even if they were, I wouldn’t let that happen.” 

“Baby, just listen to me, okay? I wouldn’t steer you wrong, would I?”

You sigh and say in a mumble, “No, you wouldn’t.”

Remus lets the painting close quietly and he returns to the couches looking more grumpy than usual. 

“What’s birdbrain up to now?” Sirius asks. 

“Apparently the four of us are trying to seduce her.”

The three boys burst out laughing, a tiny snippet of the rambunctious noise that usually filled the common room. The grumpy look did not leave Remus’ face. It remains as you enter the common room, still looking upset and rubbing your eyes. You give the boys the briefest of glances before looking away and beelining it to the girls’ dorms. 

“Of course he made her cry,” Remus scowls. 

---

He loves me. I love him. He loves me. I love him. 

You kept repeating that in your head. Your boyfriend just cared for you, that’s all. He just cared so, so much. Almost too much. Was that something to fault him over? Goodness, you didn’t want to.

He loves me. I love him. 

Maybe if you said it enough, it would soothe your uneasiness. You’re laying in bed. Sleep was refusing to take you so you toss and turn, trying to make the least amount of noise with your rustling sheets. You really didn’t want to wake Lily or Marlene or Mary and have to have a heart-to-heart about why you can’t sleep. 

He loves me. I love him. 

Eventually, enough is enough. You climb out of bed, grab your robe and go to the common room. You almost laugh when you see Remus already sitting by the fire. From the way he’s sitting, he most definitely has a book in his lap. You stand quietly next to an armchair near him.

“Mind if I join you?” you ask softly. 

He jumps slightly but smiles as soon as he recognizes your voice and looks up. 

“Please,” he breathes, gesturing to the chair you’re standing by. “Couldn’t sleep?”

You nod as you tuck your legs underneath you.

“What’s eating your mind, love?”

“Nothing. Just couldn’t sleep.”

“Don’t lie to me.” His voice was so knowing yet gentle. And he always could tell when you lied and he refused to tell you what your tell was. 

You sigh. “Can you love someone too much?”

Remus doesn’t respond right away; he doesn’t know how to. Did you love your boyfriend too much? Did he love you too much? Was it a good thing or a bad thing to love too much? 

You look at the fire, waiting for Remus to answer. You don’t mind that he isn’t answering right away. You like that he’s thinking about it, choosing his words carefully. It was one of the things you loved about him.

“I… I don’t think you can love the right person too much. Your love won’t be too much or too little when it’s right.”

When you look at Remus, he’s already looking at you with so much concern and love in his eyes. You rest your head on your hands.

“When did you get to be so wise, Lupin?”

He shrugs. “One of the perks of being an old man, I guess.”

You sigh. You think Remus looks very cozy in his sweater and pyjama bottoms. There was something about him that always seemed cozy and comfortable. Being with him was one of the places you felt most at ease. 

You need to stay away from them. 

Your boyfriend’s words echo in your mind. It makes you want to cry. You want him to be the right person, but you couldn’t stay away from the Marauders, most of all Remus. He was your best friend. What if your boyfriend was the right person for you but you weren’t his?

“I… I don’t think I’m enough for him,” you mumble. “He’s too good for me.”

Remus stares at you dumbfounded. 

“Too good for you? Don’t be ridiculous — he doesn’t deserve you.”

“Remus-” you start to say. 

“No, darling, listen. I know it’s not my place and I’m not trying to meddle, but he’s not right for you. He told you you couldn’t cheer for your own house’s Quidditch when we played Ravenclaw and he’s not even on the team.”

“He just really wanted us to be cheering for the same team.”

“He told you to stay away from us.”

Your face hardens and your lips form a thin line.

“You heard that?”

He nods and says, “Your boyfriend shouldn’t be so insecure in your relationship. He should trust you to be around other people, around your friends. Especially around your friends who you’ve known for years.”

“I know,” you sigh. “But-”

Remus cuts you off again. “No buts, darling. Have you ever given him a reason to doubt your feelings for him?”

“No.”

“You give him all your love and that’s how he responds? You don’t deserve that kind of treatment. We’re not dumb, we know how much you’ve been fighting. If he can’t see how lovely, strong, loyal, smart, perfect you are, how devoted you can be when you care for someone, that’s on him. It’s on him for not trusting you, not seeing how you are more than capable of handling yourself and able to come back to the ones who care for you most.”

You close your eyes. Tears are building and you really don’t want them to fall. You know if you start crying, you won’t be able to stop. Something about Remus being right struck a nerve. You should be enough for your boyfriend. If Remus was able to see all of this in you, why couldn’t he? 

You feel a hand on the side of your face. You open your eyes to Remus crouching in front of you, one hand holding your face and the other placed next to your leg, helping him maintain his balance. 

“I know you said not to meddle, but that’s truly what I think, sweetheart. I think that relationship isn’t worth the arguing. I think it’s run its course.”

You feel the tears beginning to fall as you nod. “I-I, I think so too.”

“Oh, darling,” he coos as he pulled you into a hug.

You let the tears fall more freely as Remus holds you tight to his chest. He doesn’t shush you. He just holds you, softly rubbing your back. You could always be vulnerable with him. He understood in a way that you felt no one else did. He never judged you. He was your safe place. 

“Rem?” you ask, looking up at him.

“Mhmm?”

“Will you be there when I end things?”

“You want me there?”

You nod. “I won’t back down if you’re there.”

“Then I’ll be there.”

---

He was there for you. He was there for you when you broke up with your boyfriend. He was there for you when he tried to convince you that breaking up was a mistake. Remus was there for you when you broke down crying later. He never left your side. And you liked it. You had your own traveling safe place in Remus. 

With each passing day, being without your now-ex was easier. Being with Remus was easy. 

But you weren’t with Remus. The more you considered it, the more you wished you were. He already treated you better than your ex did. He never made you feel like you were too much or not enough. You knew he trusted you more than life itself. You didn’t dare say anything though. What if you ruined the friendship? What if you said something and lost your four best friends in one swoop? 

It really hits you one night, a few weeks after the breakup. Today had been nothing special. Just classes and studying in the library with Remus. But it had felt so special and every time your hands accidentally touched, you swear you felt fireworks. 

I love him. … Does he love me?

Why did you always think about things when you were in bed? Once again, you’re tossing and turning. You groan quietly as you get up. You know you won’t get sleep. 

This time, you do laugh when you see Remus already in the common room, sitting by the fire with a book as usual.

“Do you ever sleep?” you ask with a laugh as you join him on the couch.

You rest your head on his shoulder and look at the pages of his book.

“Usually during History of Magic and from three to seven.”

You giggle and Remus turns his head to look at you, a soft smile playing on his lips. 

“What’s on your mind tonight, sweetheart?”

You don’t respond right away, the worry of ruining a perfectly good friendship festering inside of you. 

“Do you fancy anyone?” you ask quietly.

His eyes go wide and he chuckles awkwardly. He looks away. 

Oh, he so does.

“Erm, yeah. I do…”

There’s a beat of silence. 

“Do you think she’s the one? The right one, I mean.”

“I’d like to think so. Only been in love with her since third year.”

“How do you know?”

“She’s my safe place. More than James, more than Sirius, more than Peter. She’s the loveliest person I know. She’s brilliant. Beautiful. Loyal. Perfect.” He pauses. “She has her flaws but doesn’t everyone? I mean, I got my furry little problem.”

Without thinking, you say, “You’re my safe place.” 

He looks back at you, the softest look in his eyes.

“I am?” he whispers. 

“You are.”

“So we’re each other’s safe place, huh.”

She’s my safe place. 

The realization hits you. Your face heats as you stare into those warm brown eyes. 

“You think I’m beautiful?”

He hums in response. There’s a silent conversation happening between you as you maintain eye contact. You nod. He places his hand underneath your chin and lifts your face. He leans in slowly, giving you time to pull away in case he misunderstood you. You don’t. You lean in too, meeting his lips with your own. The fireworks you felt when your hands accidentally brushed paled in comparison to when he kissed you. The hands were barely a spark and this was a firework show's finale. 

Maybe Remus really was your right person. 

[multifandom-nerds-blog]

Collection of Soren HCs/concepts/ideas mostly based on him having dark magic used on him in a, well, very permanent way (twice!). Cause I just feel like having dark magic inside of you like that must have some side effects.

I have more general HCs about Soren in another draft that I will post later.

He's constantly running cold. Like super cold, it wouldn't be healthy for anyone else but it's "just" a side effect from having dark magic inside him. This man is a block of ice. Most people don't notice though, even with how much physical affection he likes to show, because he walks around with full armor most of the time annyway, with only his head and fingers being uncovered. So no one really knows his body temperaturis so low. Especially since it doesn't physically affect him, it's just that it would definitely raise some questions if someone would take his temperature.

-> Claudia healing him from the full body paralysis made it more extreme. The low body temperature technically still doesn't affect him, but it definitely weirded him out (still does) when he noticed it after all the stress from the first arc wore off. He was used to it before, where he could still believably tell people he's just running cold, probably thought so himself, now his skin was really freezing cold. So he started wearing his fingerless gloves too so people don't freak out at his cold hands. (and pjs under his armor to maybe get the temperature up with some extra layers, because I'm looking at his new armor and he's wearing so many layers already wtf.)

-> The way he did notice was because someone did freak out. Ezran probably tried to drag him somewhere, not that he had to since Soren probably kept guard 24/7 of Ezran the first few weeks after the stormspire. (With the army and crownguard being still messed up and the whole political mess that first few few weeks must have been.) Anyhow, Ezran tried to drag Soren, probably to the kitchen, by taking his hands only to freak out by the icecubes his hands were. The next day Soren started wearing his gloves.

His sense of temperatures is also slightly messed up sometimes. Eats or drinks stuff often that is still way to hot and burns his mouth before noticing, while also taking the coldest showers known to mankind (he just says cold showers are healthy)

Unless he does his skin/hair routine obviously. He's high maintanence, cause lavender oils y'know.

It is extremly hard for him to get sick/catch a cold. This is a combination of having magical lungs basically/probably having had any possible bad sickness as a child you can get (me lmao)/and his general healthy lifestyle. When he does catch something it's mostly just like an annoying allergy. Or a stomach bug, cause those are nasty and get to everyone.

You can actually see traces of the dark magic on his body. On his chest and along his spine on the back, in the way of purple lines, patterns maybe. But their not always visible on first glance. It kinda depends on his physical and mental state on how visible they get. Aside from him only Viren and Claudia know about those, since he never really had a reason to go to people and be like "Hey guys I've got purple traces of dark magic on my body". (Cough Corvus lerans about it at some point cough)

Soren is obviously a bit self conscious about this, since he never really liked dark magic to begin with. But those feelings became worse after the stormspire battle and everything, with Claudia then suddenly gone too.

He usually avoids doctors too, which he doesn't need most of the time luckily, but everyone in Katolis army needs to get a mandatory checkup every 6 months. (Set in place by Sarai at one point) He has very allaborate schemes to get out of those, and succeded every single time so far. Being the head of the crownguard probably helps with it.

Also, sometimes his sense of touch in his lower body is a bit toned down (? I don't know the right word, in either language anymore). Though this is mostly a psychosomatic. Healed with magic or not, such an injury leaves it's marks. (Me? Giving my favs some of my chronical pain to cope? Never.)

He probably smells weird to dragons or other magical creatures with a high sense of smell. Not reeking like a dark mage, but it's physically still in him so it's definitely noticable. Some non-sapient wild magical creatures might avoid him because of it.

-> Zubeia especially noticed this after the timeskip, because they didn't exactly interact 1 to 1 before in S3, but kept it to herself. She likes Soren and clocked that he already has enough issues. She isn't gonna give him one more thing to be self conscious about. To Zym it's just kinda how Soren smells. Pyrrah still finds it a bit uncomfortable at times, but learned to ignore it.

Some more general Soren HCs/ideas are on their way.

Look at this doofus.

[slytherinzz]

Right time, wrong moment

Summary: Sebastian and MC share an undeniable electric connection that grows more intense over time. Their flirtation escalates, culminating in a passionate kiss at a Slytherin party. However, when things almost progress further, Sebastian hesitates, unwilling to risk their relationship in a reckless moment fueled by Firewiskey and desire.

Pairing: Sebastian Sallow x F!reader

Warnings: slight hint of sexual acitivities: aged up characters ofcourse! Mentions of Alcohol.

A/n: I hope everyone is enjoying this fics as much as I do :) Would love to get back to requests, so if you have a great idea, let me know!

There was always something electric between Sebastian and MC. It was subtle at first, in the way his eyes lingered a bit too long on hers or how he always found a reason to sit closer to her than necessary. Over time, though, the flirting had grown bolder.

“Don’t tell me you’re struggling with this potion, MC,” Sebastian teased one day during Potions class, his voice low enough for only her to hear. “If you need help, I’d be happy to assist… for a kiss.”

MC’s cheeks flamed, and she struggled not to knock over her cauldron. “Sebastian!”

“What?” he said, grinning. “Just a fair trade.”

Ominous, sitting on the other side of the table, groaned audibly. “Merlin, will you two stop? The rest of us are trying to focus on actual potion-making, not this absurd courtship.”

MC shot Ominous a glare, but Sebastian only laughed. “Courtship, huh? I like the sound of that.”

It wasn’t just in classes. In the library, he’d slide her books closer to her with a casual touch, his fingers brushing hers. On the way to the Great Hall, he’d lean closer than necessary to whisper some cheeky remark that made her pulse race.

It was maddening.

What frustrated her the most was that she didn’t know if it meant anything. Sebastian had always been charming—too charming. Girls still watched him from across the common room, hoping for his attention, though he hadn’t shown interest in anyone since their fifth year. That didn’t stop her from wondering if she was just another game to him.

When MC heard about the Slytherin party, she almost declined. It wasn’t really her scene—loud music, flowing Firewhiskey, and far too many students crammed into the common room. But Anne had encouraged her to go, and Ominis had promised to keep an eye out for trouble.

And Sebastian? Well, Sebastian had grinned and said, “You’re coming, right? Wouldn’t be a party without you.”

She couldn’t say no to that.

The Slytherin common room was alive with music and chatter when she arrived. The dark, moody lighting was offset by green and silver decorations, and students were already laughing and drinking in groups.

MC found herself with a glass of Firewhiskey in hand not long after, chatting with Poppy and Natty near the fireplace. She wasn’t much of a drinker, but the warmth spreading through her chest and the laughter all around her helped her relax.

It wasn’t long before Sebastian found her.

“You’re hiding,” he accused, leaning against the wall beside her.

“I’m not hiding,” she said, though she couldn’t keep the smile off her face.

“You are,” he insisted, stepping closer. His voice dropped, playful and intimate. “What’s the matter? Afraid I’ll drag you into something you’ll enjoy too much?”

Her heart skipped a beat. He was too close, his eyes too intent on hers.

“Maybe I’m just avoiding trouble,” she said, her voice shaky.

“Trouble?” he repeated, his smirk widening. “Oh, MC. You are trouble.”

Before she could retort, someone turned the music louder, and the crowd surged around them. Sebastian grabbed her hand, pulling her toward a quieter corner near the stairs to the dormitories.

It was quieter there, though the music and laughter still hummed in the background.

“You know,” he said, his voice softer now, “I’m glad you came tonight.”

She looked up at him, her heart racing. “You are?”

“Of course,” he said, his gaze flickering to her lips. “It wouldn’t be the same without you.”

The Firewhiskey in her system made her bolder, braver. “You say that to all the girls?” she asked, trying to sound teasing but feeling vulnerable.

His expression shifted, the playful smirk softening into something deeper. “No,” he said simply.

And then he kissed her.

It wasn’t gentle. It was hungry and desperate, like he’d been waiting for this moment for years. Her back hit the wall as his hands cupped her face, and she kissed him back just as fiercely, her fingers tangling in his hair.

All the tension between them, all the lingering touches and unspoken words, exploded in that kiss. She barely noticed the noise of the party anymore. It was just him—Sebastian, warm and intoxicating and everything she’d ever wanted.

His hands slid to her waist, pulling her closer, and she gasped softly against his lips. The sound seemed to embolden him, his fingers tracing the curve of her hips. Her heart pounded as her own hands roamed up his chest, his shirt warm and slightly rumpled beneath her touch.

He pulled back just enough to whisper, “Come with me.”

Her breath hitched. “To where?”

“My dorm,” he said, his voice low and full of promise.

She hesitated for a fraction of a second, but the way he looked at her—with a mix of longing and something close to reverence—made her nod.

The walk to his dorm was a blur. They were both unsteady on their feet, the Firewhiskey and the adrenaline making them clumsy. But when they reached his room and the door shut behind them, the world seemed to slow down.

Sebastian kissed her again, softer this time, his hands tracing the curve of her waist. She melted into him, her heart racing.

His lips traveled down her jaw, to the sensitive spot just beneath her ear, and she shivered. His hands slipped beneath the hem of her shirt, the heat of his palms against her skin sending sparks through her veins.

“Sebastian,” she whispered, her voice breathless.

He froze for just a moment before pulling back, his forehead resting against hers. “Tell me if you want me to stop,” he murmured, his voice hoarse.

“I don’t want you to stop,” she said, her hands gripping his shoulders.

His eyes darkened, and for a moment, he kissed her again, deeper, his hands roaming her sides. But then he stilled, his breathing heavy, and he pulled away entirely.

“MC,” he said, his voice shaking. “We can’t.”

Her heart dropped. “What do you mean?”

“I want you,” he said, his words rushing out. “Merlin, I want you more than anything. But not like this. Not when we’ve both been drinking. Not when you might regret it in the morning.”

Her chest tightened, embarrassment and hurt flooding her. “You think I’d regret it?”

“No,” he said quickly, his hands trembling as he cupped her face. “I mean… maybe. I don’t know. But I couldn’t live with myself if you did.” He closed his eyes, his voice breaking. “You mean too much to me, MC. I’ve wanted this for so long. I’ve wanted you for so long. But not like this. I want to remember every second. I want it to be… perfect.”

Tears pricked her eyes, and she nodded stiffly. “I… I understand.”

He looked like he wanted to say more, but she turned and left before he could stop her.

MC woke up with a headache and a heartache that no amount of Pepperup Potion could cure.

Sebastian avoided her at breakfast, which only made the knot in her chest tighten. She couldn’t stop replaying the night in her head—the kiss, the way he’d looked at her, the way he’d stopped.

Ominis found her in the library later that day, his expression unreadable as he sat across from her.

“Sebastian’s been sulking,” he said bluntly.

She flushed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You do,” he said, his tone sharper now. “He cares about you, MC. More than he’s ever cared about anyone. But he’s a bloody idiot, and he’s convinced himself he’s doing the noble thing., and I think he's right''

She looked down at her hands. “He stopped because he didn’t want me.”

“That’s not true,” Ominis said firmly. “He stopped because he wants you too much. He’s terrified of losing you.”

Her heart ached at his words, but doubt still lingered.

It wasn’t until later that evening, when she found Sebastian in the Undercroft, that everything came to a head.

“Why did you stop?” she asked, her voice trembling.

He turned, his eyes wide with surprise. “MC—”

“Was I not good enough for you?” she demanded, her voice breaking.

“Merlin, no!” he said, crossing the room in two strides. “That’s not it at all. You’re… you’re everything to me. Don’t you see that?”

She stared at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Then why?”

“Because I love you!” he shouted, his voice echoing in the stone chamber. “And I didn’t want to ruin it. I didn’t want to ruin us.”

Her breath caught. “You love me?”

“Yes,” he said,

Sebastian took a shaky step closer, his eyes filled with a mix of fear and vulnerability. “I love you, MC. I’ve loved you for years. And I was terrified that if we went through with it last night… like that… I’d hurt you, or you’d wake up and regret it, and I’d lose you forever.”

Her heart twisted painfully, the weight of his words sinking in. “I wouldn’t have regretted it,” she said softly, her voice trembling. “I’ve been in love with you too, Sebastian. For so long. And last night… I thought maybe, finally, you felt the same way.”

He closed his eyes as if her words physically hurt him. “I do. I’ve always felt that way. But I didn’t want our first time together to be because of Firewhiskey and a reckless moment. You deserve more than that. You deserve everything.”

She reached for him, her fingers brushing against his. “And what if all I want is you?”

He let out a ragged breath, his hands shaking as he took hers in his. “Then I promise, I’ll give you all of me. But when it happens… when we happen. I want to remember every second, every look, every touch. I want it to be perfect because you’re perfect to me.”

Her tears spilled over, but this time they weren’t from pain. She leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his neck as his hands settled hesitantly on her waist. “You’re an idiot,” she murmured against his shoulder, her voice breaking into a watery laugh.

He laughed softly, the sound tinged with relief. “I probably deserve that.”

They stood there in the quiet warmth of the Undercroft, holding each other as if the rest of the world didn’t exist.

The days that followed were nothing short of transformative. The awkwardness was gone, replaced by a newfound closeness that neither of them had known they were capable of. Sebastian was careful, deliberate in his affection. His touches lingered longer, his kisses softer but filled with unspoken promises.

They spent evenings in the Undercroft, talking about everything and nothing. He’d bring her flowers he charmed to glow faintly in the dark, and she’d tease him about being sappy, though her smile gave her away every time.

And when they finally decided to take the next step, it wasn’t rushed or tinged with doubt. It was slow, intimate, and everything Sebastian had wanted for them.

He made good on his promise, memorizing every detail of her, every sound she made, every look she gave him. And when it was over, he held her close, whispering against her skin, “I love you. I’ll always love you.”

For the first time in years, MC felt whole.

They weren’t perfect—neither of them was—but they were perfect for each other. And as they lay entwined in the quiet of the Room of Requirement, the world outside felt a little less daunting, a little less heavy, because they had each other.

And that was everything.

[lucentloo]

First Kiss

Summary: You’ve never truly thought the perfect first kissed existed after a drunken one night stand had stolen every innocence you have ever had, but Remus is here to prove what a first kiss should really be like.

Remus Lupin x Fem!reader

Wc: 1143

Content Warnings: Modern au, fem!reader, swearing, drunk sex (in the past, only mentioned not described fully), kissing, pinning, friends to lovers, Sirius and James are supportive, Lily as best friend, Peter here but not here, low standards, if I’ve missed any please let me know!

a/n: Hello lovely’s! This is Fic number three now and I can’t say my writings getting better but the more you interact the more confidence I get! I’m sorry it’s been a long time since my last Fic but life’s been hectic and I’m a slow writer so that’s on me. Either way I hope you enjoy this little Remus story today and have a wonderful weekend/week! Also not proof read so sorry for any mistakes!

When you were little you would imagine your first kiss as magical and romantic, something you would remember forever. Instead your innocence was tainted by a drunken night full of affectionless touches and meaningless words. Little you thought a prince would sweep you off your feet and steal the air from your lungs. And although the air was taken from you that night, it wasn’t quite as enjoyable as you thought.

After that one night you stopped expecting the love you read in your books or the touches you saw in the movies. Every relationship you indulged in only reinforced the obnoxiously low standards you had set for yourself. Your friends, more specifically Lily, encouraged you to find better men, to set a better standard, but you refused. You didn’t think you could find any better than you already have.

That was until you met Remus.

Him and his friends had opened a music store right next to your bookstore, and that helped boost both of your stores' activity. The boys invited you out to coffee to kinda get to know each other a bit more and you were immediately besotted with Remus. His calm nature, chocolate eyes, and even the scar on his upper lip that he got from a guy named Sniffilous, though you don't believe that that was his actual name. Remus was effortlessly kind and brilliant and knew when a joke had gone too far. He was unlike any guy you’ve met. 

You started hanging out with him more often than the rest of your friends and got extremely close. Close enough that people have begun to speculate that there was something more brewing between us. You desperately want there to be. Every time his hand grazes yours and when he whispers a joke in your ears so that only you can hear, you feel special. Like you’re worth something more than a quick fuck.

One Saturday when you were hanging out with Remus at your bookstore you asked him what his most embarrassing story was, just out of curiosity. 

Remus was fiddling with a pen when he answered. “I believe my most embarrassing story was when I believed a story my mother once told me all the way until I was fourteen.” He says quietly, not trying to break the comfortable silence around us. 

You lean forwards on your elbows that were situated on your desk. You were previously rifling through documents and files trying to find the book you were missing. “What was the story?” You ask, genuinely intrigued.

Remus hummed and rose to stand next to me and sit on my desk. “My mother once believed that there was a magical world, full of wizards and witches, and they had a whole society. She made me believe that one day I would get accepted into a school for the young witches and wizards and that I would learn every spell in the book. I only stopped believing that when I thought a teacher was a disguised troll and I got sent home. I still cringe thinking about those ten years of my life.” When Remus finishes with the story he scrunches his perfectly adorable nose so cutely that you give a little giggle. 

“Now you.” Remus gestures to me with his head.

“Me?” You ask confused.  

“Yeah, you,” He says again, “what’s your most embarrassing story?” He asks it in such an innocently mischievous way that you can’t help but chuckle and think about it. 

“I think my most embarrassing story would be my first kiss.” You blush as you answer, immediately regretting even mentioning it. However, you see the curiosity in his eyes and continue. “I was drunk and some guy who I was talking to that night brought me back to his apartment. I don’t think I have to say much more than that.” You are hard core blushing now and look back at your files. 

Remus however is looking your way with a furrowed brow and downturned lips. He hops off the desk and stands in front of you. “You're telling me that your first kiss was a drunken one night stand? That’s it?” He asks. You nod hesitantly, wondering why he looks so distraught.

“Oh baby,” He said softly and you felt your heart pick up its pace, his proximity suddenly making your knees weak. “That does not count as a first kiss.”

You look up  into his eyes that now burn with a small desire and start protesting. “But a first kiss is when you have your kiss for the first time, and I did. That counts as my first kiss-” Your cut off by soft lips gently pushing against yours. Your eyes widen in shock before a steady hand cups your cheek and you melt into the kiss. It wasn’t a quick in and out but it also wasn’t a long, heavy makeout sesh. Just a soft kiss on the lips and Remus was pulling away.

“That is a first kiss. It’s loving and soft and it was one you were fully aware of.” Remus cups the back of your neck and pulls it forwards to rest our foreheads together. “Your first kiss isn;t your first kiss until you say it is.” Remus speaks so softly you almost couldn’t hear him.

You smile slightly and lean in close again, your lips making contact with his once more. This time it goes on a little longer to the point where you grip his shoulders begging for more, noises escape your lips without your permission, and when you’re finally finished you pull away gasping for air. 

Remus has a beautiful smile on his face as he looks at you. He bends his head down enough to whisper in your ear. “I really like kissing you.” You giggle and bury your face into his chest. In the distance you hear cheers and clapping and as you lift your face you see two of Remus’ close friends, James and Sirius, appearing from behind the bookcases. Your cheeks burn a deep red as you hide your face into Remus’ chest once again. 

“How long have you two been here?” Remus asks with a small sigh.

Sirius laughs and pats him on the back. “Just long enough to see the show Moons, and quite the show it was!” He teases. James elbows him in the ribs but his smile is a carbon copy of Sirius’.

As the boys divulge into endless bickering and attempt  to embarrass your poor Remus even more, you bury yourself fully into his arms. You wonder what this will mean for the future. For your relationship, and although in any other scenario you would have been nervous all you can feel is excitement. 

You thought that this would be a very good first kiss to remember.

[championofthefade]

Thinking about Veilguard sometimes really makes me start picking it apart.

Yes, I did like it for what it is. But as someone who played the three games for the first time this year, I found it disheartening at times.

Long story short for those who rather not read my rambling: I liked Veilguard, but there are parts that just don't feel right and that everything we've done in Thedas the last three games were all for naught. (I'm yapping about my complaints, might make a more positive post later)

It's a mixed bag, really.

While I liked the gameplay, there are things that just don't rub me the right way.

The first immediate example is how the (only, in my opinion) major choice we are presented with is choosing Treviso and Minrathous. We have the choice to harden the other companions in spirit, but the only ones that actually are affected are Lucanis and Neve.

While I have done both paths, I can't say that one is a better choice over the other. Shadow Dragons are decimated if you choose Treviso, Treviso is blighted if you choose Minrathous. I think that it's fair that Lucanis doesn't want to romance Rook if you choose Minrathous, because he wants to save his city from dying. He trusted you to follow through, while Neve expects that you won't since she's a cynic. Which makes sense why she's willing to still romance you if you choose to save Treviso, although it'll be a bit more challenging to, because you were presented with an impossible choice. I don't mind that he ends up with Neve, even if the romance for all the companions kinda fall flat if you think about it too much.

Another thing is Taash. Their identity is important to their story, but having Rook (us the player) choose how to deal with their cultural crisis doesn't make sense and makes me not want to repeat those quests. Why is there no option to embrace both the Qun and being Rivani? Why am I the one choosing how Taash chooses to express themselves? Relating back to the city choices, Lucanis and Neve both choose their hardened options with Illario (getting jail) and Aelia (being given to the Threads). With Taash, the choices are a little less clear to me. I think we shouldn't be able to dictate one's cultural choices.

One of the worst choices that we have to make as Rook is Harding vs Davrin. Thinking about the amount of people who are saving Davrin just for Assan is actually crazy to me. I love Davrin, but he's reminding me of what happened to Wyll in BG3, and it's not a fun time. (I can barely pick up BG3 for various reasons and this is one of them.) I'm glad Bioware doesn't pander to the fans that are loud, because I don't have to worry about everyone's favorite white boy getting more content than the only black companion (saying this as a white person myself). I will always save Davrin because he is a compelling character even without Assan. I love the feather-brain but I feel like I want to know Davrin more than his mythical son.

I hate that we only got three world state choices, two of which don't really matter since it's more flavor text. It doesn't matter if we disbanded or merged into the Chantry, we don't see the consequences of those actions. It doesn't matter if your Inquisitor wants to Stop Solas at All Costs, because apparently they feel responsible for Solas being... Well, Solas. And our romances, outside of Solavellan, were reduced to a codex entry and sidelined.

Yes, Solas is important, and yes, I expected his romance to be given more light. I'm in the camp of people who feared that was going to be the case. And it was.

Yes, I agree that him getting a Good Ending with his vhenan is one of the better endings, but his friendship one and facing his fear of dying alone is also important. I liked playing a Rook that tricked him, I liked playing a Rook that chose to fight him as well. I'm glad we have at least those aspects that we can control.

As someone who has romanced Lucanis and Neve so far, I wish there were more little cutscenes, and not just for Lucanis. I'm just okay with how things are, even if they're a bit empty in comparison to what we could've had. That being said, I think that there's always room for improvement to have a more fulfilling resolution to the romance in the game the devs claimed was the most romantic. I wish there was more, I wish that there had been more to support that claim. I want to feel closer to these companions, and I am sure that I will as time goes on. But as it stands, for now after sitting with the game for nearly a month (11/29), I wish we had gotten more.

I would like to say that it really doesn't feel like the most romantic compared to the other three games. (Blackwall's "heart laid bare", Dorian's "you're dreadfully dull and I hate you", Josephine's letter of "let me make a promise to you here. I dream you will say yes", Zevran's "I'll storm the Black City for you, never doubt it", Anders' "ten years, a hundred years from now, someone like me will love someone like you, and there will be no templars to tear them apart", just to name the few that feel more romantic than what we're sitting with for Veilguard romances. And one of them is a codex entry.)

I hate that we have to learn through missives that the South is gone, save for Skyhold. I hate that we had no power to help the South, and that the last three games were all for naught. It's upsetting to know that Ferelden is gone. RIP Orlais, you slayed too close to the sun. Kirkwall being empty is a scary thought, but it's gone too.

It makes me wonder where HOF is. Did they ever find a cure? Are they even alive? What about a Hawke that didn't get left in the Fade? You mean to tell me that they wouldn't be out there in the frontlines doing something? You mean to tell me that they're sitting on their asses?

Varric dying is something else entirely, but it's just gut wrenching that we don't even get to mourn him. A second playthrough was mindbogglingly eye-opening. Harding was mourning when you check on her in her little room. Neve reminisces about how Varric brought her onto the job and she wishes that she didn't take it. They were mourning while Rook probably looked like they were in the denial stage of grief. What killed me inside was the fact I caught it the first time when Bellara name dropped Varric like she didn't know he was there. That's when I started thinking maybe he was gone, but I didn't want to believe it. I had to step away from my computer when the reveal happened because I was devastated.

We don't get to see just how the team made the fake lyrium dagger, or how they even managed to find Rook in the first place. We don't get to see the love interest's reaction, only the aftermath where they are still registering that Rook is there. We don't even get an explanation on how those things were possible. To create a perfect lyrium replica and locate someone in the Fade? Knowing that we could've had a mission to save whoever was left in the Fade hurts. RIP to those left in the Fade.

The secret ending is just... Bewildering to say the least. What do you mean that there's an even bigger force that has been controlling the narrative from Across the Sea? What do you mean these incredibly well written villains had no agency in their choices and were being used to orchestrate whatever the hell the Executors wanted?

Again, what do you mean that all that we've been through in Thedas just doesn't matter anymore?

[deathmetalunicorn1]

The Replacement Fighter from RoR but this time it's with the Demon Slayer characters.

What if the reader accidentally slipped through time & "went back" to the Taisho Period? Basically they "teleported" from the modern era to the past. And while they still had their original capabilities, personality, characteristics & looks, they gained some new ones too. Though they were just happy they still had their lanky ass height & tattoos. Their breathing style is similar to "Serpent breathing" but instead of snakes they get the "Naga." Basically a water dragon/snake from South East Asian mythology.

The outfit/accessories:

Sure, they're very strong & can fight off demons pretty easily, but they have no idea what a "Hashira" even is. And they think the demons are just playing a "silly prank" sometimes.

Since the reader is from modern times, they had some issues with the bathrooms, bed & the overall lack of air conditioning and wifi. Then they were freaking out about where to charge their phone & tablet. The reader also had a habit of using slangs, phrases & memes from modern times which is something that the others had hard time understanding.

How would the KNY characters react to them?

For: Uzui, Rengoku, Sanemi, Mitsuri, Urokodaki, Hagenezuka & Gyomei

-It had been not only a big shock, but a big adjustment for you, when you wound up in the past, long before Wi-Fi, air conditioning, video games, and refrigerators.

-Coming back to the past in Japan was more than enough, especially dealing with demons that tried to attack you, wanting your ‘prime flesh’ to grow stronger. Too bad they chose the wrong opponent, and you handled many demons bare handed.

-You originally thought they were bandits trying to scare anyone passing by to attack them for anything valuable, until you saw one of them morph into a creature that many would call a nightmare, that’s when you knew that these weren’t humans, not anymore.

-Your raw strength quickly caught the attention of the Demon Slayer Corps, who begged you for your help in taking out the demons, more specifically the leader of the demons, Muzan.

-You didn’t hesitate to agree to help, not at all bothered because you could hear their desperation. You quickly became a Hashira, making the final Selection look easy, to the awe of many and annoyance of some who had worked so hard for so many years.

-Your breathing style was like Obanai’s Snake Breathing, but it was far more powerful, and you named it Naga Breathing, and many demons, including some of the Upper Moons, were terrified of you, knowing what you were capable of, seeing your raw strength for themselves.

-Muzan desired to eat you, knowing that if he consumed you, he would be unstoppable, but while you make look like a snack, you aren’t looking to be eaten by anyone. He even approached you once, asking if you wanted more power, to become a demon, something you delivered a hot and fresh knuckle sandwich straight to his teeth for.

-For the most part, living in this day and age wasn’t bad, you got your own house, you got to lounge around all day, and you didn’t have any real responsibilities, at least at home.

-You did miss air conditioning and electricity, as you missed playing your video games and watching videos, but it was unique to see the birth of electricity in Japan, as inventions were being revealed for the first time, so it was kind of fun to see when things like this first started out.

-Your fellow Hashira didn’t really know what to make of you, as you talked funny, and talked about odd things that they had never heard of.

-Some liked you, like Mitsuri because you were handsome and a big eater, Obanai which was surprising due to your quiet nature and similar breathing style, Tengen who thought you were flashy, Gyomei who could sense your strength but also your desire to not hurt others aimlessly, Shinobu because you would ask questions about her research that would get her on the right track of new medicines, Giyuu because you were quiet and didn’t really mind if he just sat with you, Rengoku who was your opposite, being bright and energetic, almost too much at times, but you liked his vibe.

-The only one who was irritated with you was Sanemi, who you discovered was irritated with everyone, constantly raging, even more so when he would be yelling and having a tantrum and you would pipe up with, “Big mood.” Gods you were so infuriating! If you weren’t so strong and needed to take on Muzan he probably would have strangled you long ago!

-You also found yourself with three and a half younger warriors who would always follow you around, Inosuke because he wanted you to fight him, Zenitsu and Tanjiro who admired your strength while also being confused by your lazy personality when you weren’t fighting, and the half was Nezuko, who would follow you around like a duckling, sensing that you were a good person, mainly because you let her play with your hair without being bothered.

-Muzan had to be careful as he and his Upper Moons planned an attack, not only was he at risk of facing the Hashira, the strongest of the Corps, but he was also being faced with you, a warrior that made him feel fear, much like Yoriichi.

-You were oblivious to his plotting, as were the rest of the Corps, you were in your house, watching Inosuke, Tanjiro, and Zenitsu sparring while Nezuko was putting flowers in your hair while you were eating snacks.