#not to mention he’s got some of the most fairytale themed episodes of new who.

[long-song-a]

the eleventh doctor's arc truly comes so full circle! it’s the story of a mad gods hard, angry conflict between responsibility and fantasy. from the moment he crashes into amelia’s backyard, he’s like something of a fairy tale; a phantom, a wise man, a hero. a mad man who can disappear just as quickly whence he came. and when he returns, has the ability to turn one’s entire world around— without a single thought for any damage he may have caused along the way. he didn’t just forget his part in the time war: he’s quick to forget a lot, to go too far, to never look back. to never question himself. he hurries on to the next place, becomes a legacy within a few hours on some planet, in some time, and calls it a day. until he begins again. he is the dreamer of improbable dreams, because he requires that divide from reality.

he is “the man who forgets” because he needs to seperate himself from who he was, he needs this new perspective, he needs the worship, someone relying on him, and only him. “i took you with me because i was vain. because i needed to be adored.” eleven began his life as a goofy, kind soul who would happily spend his first moments eating fish fingers and custard with a child, and promise her adventure. the fantasy. yet he’s also a man who would disappear for fifteen years and never provide a legitimate apology. the avoidance of responsibility. (until the god complex, of course.) he calls the atraxi back to earth because it allows him to fulfil the role of a hero in some fantasy, to show off in front of amy, to be that whimsical, magical figure she saw him as when she was a child. to uphold that image. he wants to be a story, he doesn’t want commitments. not to mention the fact that amy literally dreams him back into existence, that her belief in him made him whole again.

the doctor hates endings. he rips the final page out of his books because he can’t stand the thought, the concept. he doesn’t want the adventure to conclude, he doesn’t want the reality to seep through. he doesn’t want the stories to ever end, because in his mind, he is the greatest story of them all. (i’m not even going to go into his arc in season six because i need a whole separate post for that. season six is the consequences of all these actions. and hoo boy. it is brilliant.)

the day of the doctor, i believe, is really the turning point for eleven. the man who forgets arc forcing him to face the consequences of his actions, to step down from the mad man in a box pedestal he’s reigned on for this entire incarnation. he finally takes full responsibility on trenzalore, by sending the TARDIS, and clara away so he can stand and fight for the remaining centuries of his life. he wants to run, to flee, the idea of staying in one place so very terrible (but he takes responsibility, sees the reality, sees he can't just help out for a bit, then saunter back into his box) and he stays. he sends away the TARDIS because he knows he’ll take the easy way out, and step safely inside her doors.

not to mention the hard, in your face symbolism of the christmas town in trenzalore quite literally looking like it came right out of a fairy tale. visually, this is how the doctor wants to live, he wants the whimsical, to live like a storybook. he wants only the middle of the book, before the conflict, before the hero has to make a hard choice. but when he does achieve it, when he arrives in that fairy tale-esque town, it becomes the reality he’s chosen to live, with more responsibility, more bravery than this incarnation has ever shown. he’s rewarded for his nine centuries of responsibility because he’s no longer running towards the fantasy. he can separate the difference, and can find happiness in staying put. he ultimately becomes the heroic raggedy man amy idolised far too long, he’s earned the title, he’s become the doctor.

[dangermousie]

Nobody can convince me the show didn’t know EXACTLY what it was doing by having Aziz feed Efnan by hand, putting his fingers into her mouth as she opens it.

Ummmm

But on a less salacious note, I do adore that he noticed she missed her meal.

The thing that I love is that this is a very shippy scene but even in the midst of their blissed out bliss we see some of little issues that become an avalanche by the end of the ep - she is gorgeously dressed by his aunt but that dress is not great for weaving and in general she’s finding it tight and uncomfortable - her finding the fancy beautiful clothes constraining and her hair up uncomfortable is a running theme through this episode - her fairytale crown has thorns in it.

And the thing, there is zero Aziz’s fault in it - he clearly doesn’t care what she wears, he lets her choose to be a weaver after a marriage or not, he prefers her hair down, he makes it explicit that if what others want makes her unhappy, she shouldn’t do it even if that other is him. He tries to put them on equal footing over and over, for example in this lovely scene:

But the thing is, she still won’t tell him she is not happy with dresses etc - he asks her point blank in the feeding scene if the dress is too tight and she lies - just as she won’t say she’s not happy the engagement party thrown by his aunt is a fancy event with society people and none of her factory friends. Because everything in society has told her that his class is superior and his class’ clothes are superior etc etc - so it does not occur to her to say to him she prefers her clothes and her friends; but also because she realizes (correctly) that this is a huge messaliance, an aristocrat from the most influential family in town marrying a village weaver daughter of a beggar.

And she loves him and does not want him to be ashamed of her. And he’s perceptive but he can’t read her mind if she lies and he really IS upper class and this is his default. She insisted to Pierre early on that Aziz loves her the way she is in terms of behavior but even there she thought changing her look was required and events of this ep defeated even that - when she tells Pierre at the end she wants him to teach her how to be a lady, that is a defeat for her and that is not even anything current (as compared to former, “who is she even?”) Aziz wants but it makes so much sense. I love that fairytale is not easy. Cinderella is all great but Cinderella was an aristocrat before her evil stepmom and her prince a personalityless perfection. How would it work to live in a palace if Cinderella only knew cleaning and kitchens and the prince had a metric ton of baggage?

Because that is the thing - Aziz loves Efnan truly but he is also looking into his father’s death which is emotionally draining and there is Dilruba. He does not love her any longer but she is a huge part of his past and it attacks all Efnan’s insecurities - like when Dilruba tells her of Aziz’s various likes and how red is his favorite color blah blah. To his credit, he tries to protect Efnan and make it very clear to D to stop messing around...

But even if he is no longer in love, she is always around and every single insecurity Efnan has starts ringing - Dilruba is gorgeous and a lady and Aziz’s first love and hell she saw them banging! And then the scene where Aziz sends a beautiful red dress to Efnan for their engagement party (because red is his favorite color) and she’s so pleased and he says she is beautiful and all so sweet 

but she then sees D come in also in red. And I don’t even hate D, because she’s only human and it would be too saintly not to try to at least make Aziz think of what he’s missing but poor Efnan!

Not to mention she’s already nervous because in addition to her being a fish out of water, Aziz is late to the engagement party, because he just got a bunch of new info about his father’s death.

To Aziz’s credit, as spun up as he is (and he’s spiraling), he can still demand the right thing from D when she shows up in his dressing room, and automatically know what is right and wrong and try to do right by Efnan.

But then D brings out info about his uncle being there the night his father died and yeah - I genuinely don’t think she tries to ruin the engagement consciously, but it’s not really real in her eyes and all she wants is to show Aziz she still cares and she doesn’t think about fallout at all. And Efnan comes in and is understandably wtf about her fiance alone in a room with his ex and Aziz is too fucked up from all this to even reassure her properly though even a minute ago he was so conscious of her possible concerns and tailored his actions accordingly. And then he gets a note from an important witness who says it’s the last chance to meet him before he leaves and his brain shortcircuits and he stops thinking of anything but that and rushes out to meet the man even as Efnan pleads - because he’s so consumed and messed up by all of this he can’t even think how it would look and make her feel to have the fiance walk out on the engagement party.

And i honestly get it, I get both of them - he actually kept it together for longer than I thought and he didn’t peace out to enjoy himself but to ultimately attempt to murder his uncle.

But that is the problem - it’s understandable but it was horrible for Efnan and is yet another consequence of being with someone with baggage. And of course, her supposed happy day turned into horror is not over yet. The day where her fiance who arrived late walked out on the engagement party seemingly on the words of his ex (he didn’t even explain to E, he was in such a rush) leaving her among haughty strangers looking down on her, is about to get way way worse, when her horrifying father crashes the party, insulting her and demanding money.

And she walks out of the house, distraught, and asks Pierre to turn her into a lady, as I mentioned...

But you know what hit me so hard? This was one of her worst moments and Aziz was not there to protect her. He’s protected her constantly since he came into her life (to be fair she protected him just as hard), but here, in a moment she needed protection so hugely and when he should have been the most at her side, he was not there, chasing the past instead of caring for his future. And it makes sense, it makes sense, but I hope that she won’t just be heartbroken, I hope she will be angry for his failing her - he did not when they were strangers and now they are engaged and he’s nowhere - I don’t want her to just be “if only I were worthier,” I want her to lose it at him. The show realizes transforming into a lady is not a solution and would make her miserable for no reason (Aziz walked out because of murder investigation, she could have been a princess and he still would have) - she does not need to change, she needs confidence in who she is - but I also want him to realize he fucked up.

I do so love that class differences and the fact that he’s older and so with a bunch of baggage don’t magically go away!

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

A morbid thought hit me just now, how many romance sidequests do actually hold up? Like thinking on it I only love two of the six, and kinda like one. Over half of the romance sidequests have been duds! O__O

I don’t quite agree that they were all duds, but some of them were pretty bad, and others didn’t quite live up to expectations. Let me take a look-through: 

The Celestial Ball is probably my favorite overall, even to this day. It just holds up really well, and it doesn’t really have any problems that the other quests don’t have as well. (The recycled dialogue, for example.) I think the success of this one comes from the focus on the event, preparing and enjoying it with our friends. This one is the best TLSQ out of all of the others overall, but it’s not necessarily the best Dating TLSQ, if that makes any sense. Because it plays things more ambiguously. It stars Penny, but her inclusion makes sense for the character and the rest of the cast does get adequate screen-time. The only thing is that, once you’re at the Ball, you wind up spending most of the night with Penny except for one scene with your Love Interest. So it winds up feeling like you’re on a Date with Penny regardless of who you pick, but again, the lack of overt romantic themes make that easier to swallow. Andre being the Style Wizard is introduced here, and he comes up with three boss outfits. Not to mention, Rowan gets a bigger role, and their relationship with Ben comes into play. Bill x Rowan gets teasing, too! How could I not love this one?

The First Date TLSQ is much more steeped in romance. Not just in the sweet and wholesome moments, but also in the high school drama, alas. It was the quest to introduce cutting characters and it removed three of them, while only adding one in return. So it’s got that working against it. The whole premise of MC writing the note is just so damn silly. I can laugh at it, but it really doesn’t make sense, especially since half of the options aren’t even in their Potions class. Tonks and Charlie, for as much as I love them, really need to work on their social skills because guys, guys, guys. What were you thinking? Characters expressing sadness that you didn’t choose them is an interesting concept, I’m both relieved and a little disappointed that they never explored this more. The scene in the courtyard at night was nice enough to make everything else worth it, but the whole idea that MC’s love interest might not like them anymore is a bit hard to go along with. One final plus though, is that this quest has the best outfits to choose from, period. I know it’s subjective but damn, Andre really outdid himself this time.

Valentines Day I...oh boy. The culmination of so much I don’t like. This quest started the tradition of having all of the love interests needlessly confess to MC, taking up valuable time for a reveal that doesn’t matter if you don’t choose the character and makes things awkward...and also doesn’t matter if you do choose them because it removes all tension and  honestly? If the character is available, I already know they’re going to say yes. Penny acts like she’s drunk during the entire quest, and not in a charming way either. It really gets to the point of being out of character. And Gilderoy. Fucking. Lockhart. He is so annoying. Jam City got so caught up in featuring any canon character they could, that they never stopped to realize no one wanted to see this guy and watch him consume most of the screen time. He gets away with stealing MC’s story at the end, as well? Like, what? How? The Greenhouse scene is one of the most beautiful to be depicted thus far. It honestly makes the entire quest worth it...but it doesn’t save the quest, and I maintain that it comes out of nowhere. It’s a brilliant standalone scene...but it doesn’t make up for the final sin: Tulip is omitted for absolutely no given reason and as a major fan of hers, I am not happy about this. 

The Festival TLSQ: Better than First Date and Valentines I, but not as good as the Celestial Ball. The story is more fun, especially with the added feature of outside classes. I like the overall carnival feel of the event, but I kind of wish this game didn’t constantly centralize MC, Penny, and Merula. Especially in the dating quests, with the whole concept of the election. Why is MC on the ballot if they didn’t run? Why can they only vote for two of the potential love interests? I know it’s a personal thing and it really kind of started in Valentines, but Andre’s outfits appeal to me less and less as time goes on, and he’s making fewer of them. That being said, I much, much prefer the concept of a “Secret Admirer” to just having everyone confess to MC, and “I think about you gobs” still makes me laugh every time I hear it. Lockhart does show up again and his sequence absolutely frustrates me. Like, he doesn’t stay as long as he did the first time and we do get to kick his ass...but why would he even dare show his face again after the botched memory charm? Why is anyone even listening to him or letting him hog the spotlight? Why is he here? Damn it, just let me and my date play around with painting our faces! I whine, it’s true, but this one is still miles better than it’s predecessor. It adds new characters, quite a few of them, and it also stars Andre. He normally doesn’t get the spotlight, so these things really work to the quest’s favor. 

Valentines Day II: This one is far from being the best TLSQ we’ve ever had, but I actually do think that on the whole? It is the best Dating TLSQ we’ve had. It really captures the theme of falling in love, and the feeling of being a Valentines Day episode. The whole storyline about Pince and Filch? I really like that! The fairytale, storybook motif? It kinda really works! We once again have everyone outright confessing to MC, but I’m just gonna ignore it. The outfits look pretty damn good actually, but I am heartbroken that Luca can’t wear that skirt. Ah well, at least gals can wear the suit. The characters just work together well in this quest, there’s a sense of comradery in putting together the event and melting Pince’s frozen heart, right down to putting Filch in that hilarious outfit and dying Mrs. Norris pink. The whole plot being a reference to a rumor from the books is great. And yeah, MC’s date would have had absolutely no time to set up that whole set-piece in the library but what do I care? It was a really sweet moment. That’s just what works so well about this quest - it’s sweet. Between MC and their Date, between Filch and Pince...it was just a fun story to watch unfold, and at the end of it all, you get to celebrate with your love interest. 

Enchanted Kiss: This one had such a promising start. I love the whole concept of MC auditioning for a play, actually putting on a production, and being cast alongside their love interest to be the romantic leads. It’s not even a “dating” TLSQ technically since you don’t go on a date with your chosen character. But you get to choose them early on and ignore all of that confessing nonsense. You get to work toward putting on a play. You get to work toward saving it...but unfortunately, that’s when it all goes wrong. I’ve said my piece about why it was a terrible idea to make everything about MC, and that kind of infected the rest of the quest. There are no outfits for any of the dating options, nor does MC even get to choose between outfits this time. Little details like that combined with how quickly this one came out after the last one lead me to believe they were perhaps rushing to get it out and I don’t know why. They went to the trouble of coming up with that adorable animation for the enchanted kiss...and they couldn’t have put a lip kiss in it, at the very end? Come on Jam City, you know that’s what everyone really wants! It’s the same as how they tease the idea of MC and their Date saying “I love you” for the first time, but this doesn’t happen either. It just started so well and became very disappointing, but it was still fun overall. 

[allmight-amiright]

Biggest Fan. Todoroki Shouto

Request: Paparazzi by Lady Gaga ft. Todohoeki (not direct quote but close enough)

Word count: 1.5K

Warnings: Dark themes.  Stalking.  Murder.  Yandere character

Notes: I’m still weak that you called him Todohoeki and I haven’t stopped calling him that since.  MORE IMPORTANTLY: FAMOUS MUSIC ARTIST!READER AU

He had been there from the beginning.  You was one of the ones who tuned in to every live stream, left comments and likes on all of your social media posts.  He would leave you really kind dms and tagged you in posts when called for.  He did everything every other fan did.  To be honest, he had now become another username in the notifications.  You cared for all of your fans, but you finally made it big in the music industry and with the big influx of fans, you just didn’t have as much time for the personal interactions like you used to.  Those who had been there from the start were so glad that you were finally getting the recognition they thought you deserved.

Well, most of them were. 

Todoroki Shouto missed the attention from you.  He missed having conversations with you during your live streams, seeing you laugh and smile at his comments.  He missed seeing the Instagram notifications like “@y/u/n liked your comment” and “@y/u/n replied to your comment” and the soft sounds of Twitter alerting him of a new message from you.  The two of you, in his mind, had become really good friends and he thought that there was a spark hidden somewhere in those private messages.  

You were his everything.  You were his wallpaper on his phone.  He had photos of you hung up around his room.  Your albums were the only thing he listened to.  He had blogs dedicated to you, all of your official merchandise, fan-made merchandise.  If you were in anyway associated with it, he probably had it.  

The alarm on his phone went off, alerting him that it was time for your weekly live stream.  He always tried to be early so he could have some time with you, just the two of you and a few other people, just like the old days.  He logged onto Twitch, selecting your profile and patiently waiting for you to go live.  Minutes passed until your face showed up on the screen of his laptop.  

“Hi, everyone!  Yes, jamie_tries, I know I’m late,” you say with a laugh.  “I may have gotten a little distracted by Say Yes To The Dress, but the episode is over, so I’m here- No, chat, I’m not getting married.  I just like watching other people get married.  Anyway, I asked you guys yesterday to submit some fun questions over on Twitter for today’s stream, so while people still join, I’m going to pull up some of the ones that I had saved.”

You pulled your phone out.  Todoroki narrowed his eyes at your phone case.  You had changed it since your last stream.  It was no longer the one with the black flowers, but instead you changed it to a sleek black case.  That’s not what put him off though.  It was the letter on the case that threw him for an unwanted loop.  There was nothing that started with the letter J in your brand nor did have anything to do with your life, so why was there a yellow J on your phone case?

Your eyes flit down to the chat where everyone else is asking the same questions Todoroki is and you laugh slightly, hiding the initial with your hand.  “It was a gift from a friend.  They thought they were funny when they gave me their initial.”

Your best friend’s name was Ashley.  Todoroki didn’t know any of your friends that had a J name.  He opened another tab, bringing up all of your social media pages.  He scrolled through all of your following and followers, compiling a list of users that had the letter j anywhere in their username.  It was a deep dive and he was barely paying attention to your stream, but this was important.  He needed to figure out who was threatening to steal you away from him.  After an hour, he had list narrowed down to a few mutuals that he was suspicious of: an old high school classmate named Jason, the nephew of your producer named Justin, a backup dancer named Jasper, Jake the sound guy, and Johnny who was Ashley’s distant cousin.  The frustration began to build in his chest, knuckles turning white as the grip on his pen tightened with each passing moment of not knowing the truth.  He was your biggest fan.  He was supposed to know everything about you.  He was supposed to meet you in person at your next concert and you would look him in the eyes, say, “No way! You’re @scream-and-shouto!  I’m so glad to finally meet you!”  He would ask you out to dinner.  You would obviously say yes.  The two of you would date and then would eventually have a grand wedding in your favorite place on the planet.  You would start a family together and live the fairytale life that he had planned for you.  

But none of that was going to happen with this J person in the picture.  

J was a boyfriend, obviously.  It didn’t take a genius to figure that out.  The way your cheeks turned the most adorable shade of pink at the mention of the phone case alluded to that easily enough.  

The phone case started a whole new chapter in his life that he never intended to get this out of hand.  He was at every single one of your concerts while you were out on tour, following you at a distance that wouldn’t be seen as suspicious by most people.  He would wait down the hall from your hotel room every time you were there, waiting to see if anyone other than you came in or out of the room.

After the sixth tour destination, you started acting differently.  You were constantly looking over your shoulder and you tended to walk with a larger group of your dancers rather than just one or two.  You would lead the group twenty minutes out of the way to get wherever you were going.  You were skiddish at even the slightest noises and if a fan stopped you in the streets you kept the conversation short, obviously wanting to get away quickly, eyes darting every which way as you hurridly took a selfie with the fan and gave them a hug.  It wasn’t like you to brush your fans off.  You were scared.  Todoroki didn’t know what had you so spooked, but he was going to find out if it was the last thing he did.  He was going to keep you safe, no matter the consequences.  

It was the ninth stop on the tour before anyone said anything to him.  He was sitting at a table across the restaurant from your group when one of them got up from their chair and walked over.  The man cleared his throat.  “Can I sit?”

Todoroki’s eyes narrow, but he nods anyway.

“What’s your name, man?” the man asks.

“Why are you interested?”

“Listen, we know that you’ve been following us.  I don’t know what magazine you’re working for, but this is ridiculous.  You’re not going to dig up any dirt on Y/N.  Honestly, you’re starting to freak them out more than anything.  So, could you maybe lay off?  Y/N isn’t used to being followed by the paparazzi yet.”

It wasn’t until the tenth stop that the news came out about one of your back up dancers being found murdered in a hotel bath tub.  It was the tenth stop when Todoroki Shouto became a suspect in a homicide.  It was that tenth stop when he finally got to talk to you.  

Was the situation ideal?  No.  He never imagined his first real conversation with you to happen in your hotel room, your wrists tied to the arm rests of a chair, your boyfriend bleeding out on the hotel bed.  Tears streamed down your face, silent from terror as Todoroki stood in front of you, the shard of broken mirror that was stained red with blood still dangling from his fingers.  

His thumb traced your face, wicking away tear drops and leaving behind streaks of blood.

“Shh, princess.  Don’t cry,” he whispered, holding your chin lovingly in his hand.  Despite his words, the tears continued down your face.

“What do you want from me?  I have money.  Just please, don’t hurt me,” you whimper.

Todoroki is taken aback.  He would never hurt you and the fact that you would ever think he would, made his heart break. “Y/N, princess, I would never hurt you.  That’s the last thing I would ever do to you.  I love you, princess.  All I want to do is protect you from all of those bad people out there in the world, okay?”  The restraints are removed from your wrists and he pulls you to your feet.  He tugs you into his chest, stroking your hair as you cry, keeping you firmly in place with his other arm. 

“I love you more than anything, princess.  Remember that, okay?  No one will ever come between us again.  It’s you and me until the end.”

[quarterfromcanon]

1-4. For the asks

Thank you so much for sending these! <3 

Once I started to answer them, I realized there were comparatively few recent television shows appearing on the list. I seemed to keep gravitating toward older ones I remembered from years ago. I took a handful of days to mull it over in case I was forgetting something, but nothing else comes to mind. Maybe my ongoing list of Shows to Watch During Quarantine will turn up some fresh results but, for now, it looks like I’ll be taking a little trip down memory lane. :) 

This turned out to be a pretty long and rambly post, so I’ll stow it under the cut!

Top 5 TV Shows 

1. Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - I can’t imagine this surprises anyone who has been following this blog for the past two years or so. It brought fellow fans into my life, got me back into writing fic, and prompted countless tags of meta. It’s the show my mind drifts to on a weekly basis (if not daily) even a full year after the finale. Just when it seemed I’d reached an age where that level of intense fandom involvement and character attachment might be fading, it proved that quite the opposite was true. I’m very thankful to the series for that, and for the people whose paths have crossed mine as a result.   

2. Schitt’s Creek - This is my #1 Feel Good show and, though I’ve been dodging spoilers for the final season until it gets uploaded to Netflix, I get the impression that it will remain in that top spot. The world feels softer and more hopeful there. It’s healing for my soul. I’m going to have a dreadfully difficult time saying goodbye, but I’m glad there are six season to revisit whenever I want. 

3. Stranger Things - The theme song alone sends such a rush of excitement through me. I love the aesthetic and the atmosphere. I sometimes have mixed feelings about the romances but the FRIENDSHIPS sure do have a direct line to my heartstrings. I think the way they’ve combined media influences into their own story is really neat. You get something that’s new and engaging, but you can also go back and enjoy the sources of inspiration with fresh appreciation. 

4. Joan of Arcadia - I can’t help it. The snark, the jackets, the early 2000s songs, the performances -- the nostalgia for this show is so strong. It’s not without its problems, but it did have some really good things to offer as well. I remember an episode that was one of my earliest introductions to the concept of a trigger, and the effect it could have on a person if exposed to one of theirs. The series dealt a lot with grief and the many forms it can take (I STILL can’t hear Fiona Apple’s cover of “Across the Universe” without getting misty-eyed). I’m also surprised, looking back, at the somewhat positive way I recall them discussing homosexuality on the several occasions that it came up in the show. Not to give too much credit since I don’t think there were recurring canonically LGBTQIA+ characters but, for a kid who spent most days around closed-minded people of a certain religious leaning, it was meaningful along my individual journey. I’d like to provide the several examples that are most vivid in my memory:

A. A girl with short hair, short nails, little to no makeup, and a bulky leather jacket is generally assumed to be a lesbian by the bullies at school. The show directly confronts the fact that “gay” should not be used an insult, that identity should not be assumed without the person telling you so, AND makes sure that the character in question never pushes back by saying harmful things about lesbians despite not actually being one herself. 

B. A boy who is questioning is able to confide in his big brother and have a fairly calm conversation about it; the awkwardness mostly comes from neither of them being accustomed to openly discussing emotions, not from the possibility of a negative response regarding the subject matter. 

C. Another character is accidentally discovered to be gay (he only appears in the one episode, if my memory serves), and some of the leads have the opportunity to share that for personal gain. However, even though he is a popular jock who is a bit of a jerk in the hallways, the show makes it clear that the right choice is still to leave the telling of that information up to him and him alone. 

Like I mentioned, it can’t be said that representation was in abundance here - for instance, I don’t believe anything other than straight or gay was presented as a possibility - but any accepting acknowledgement in a faith-centric series was something for me to hold on to in my still-deeply-closeted days. As a final Very Important personal side note, this show brought Judith Montgomery into my life (pictured below on the left), and that feels like it merits a shoutout for being what I consider a rather significant marker in my awakening. 

THE OVERWHELMING CRUSH I HAD - and still have - is one for the books. 

5. Pushing Daisies - This is another show with an aesthetic I adore. The series has such a fun, whimsical energy. The crime-solving! The clothes! The cast! There's a lot to love. It’s the kind of world I wish I could visit... well, minus the evidently rampant murder rate. 

Top 5 Overrated TV Shows

1. Once Upon A Time - *deep sigh* I tried to stick with it for so long. I think I’ve seen five out of the seven seasons in their entirety. It just felt like everything got mired down by excessive (and increasingly convoluted) subplots, often for the purpose of tossing in as many fairytale and/or Disney characters as possible. Plus, quite honestly, there was too much emphasis on romantic love. For a show whose first season involved a curse being broken by [potential spoiler, I suppose] a mother kissing her son’s forehead, I ultimately found myself up to my ears in romantic ships. It reached such a stifling extent that, if you were not particularly attached to those pairings, there wasn’t a whole lot else to entice further viewing. 

2. Under the Dome - I don’t know for certain what the general public opinion of this series was, but it felt like the commercials always featured alleged rave reviews, so I figured I could include it here. I was vaguely interested in Season 1, mainly as a fan of Rachelle Lefevre’s work. Season 2 pulled me in with the introduction of a new townsperson and I threw WAY too much of my heart into that attachment, which backfired when that character was killed. I made quite the spectacle of my heartbreak, so much so that my family doesn’t let me mention this show around them anymore. :P Season 3 was, to phrase it delicately, not a great time. The series did introduce me to a few new-to-me actors, though, so that was cool. 

3. Bates Motel - Even the incentive of learning that the two characters I liked most share a lot of screen time later in the series hasn’t been enough to call me back to this one. I don’t know if it was the pacing that put me off or what, but the prospect of finishing the remaining seasons feels so daunting. There are evidently five seasons in total and I believe I’ve only seen two of them thus far. I will probably muddle through it someday just to see how it goes, but the fact that I am so disinclined to prioritize it made this feel like a fair addition to the list. 

4. Lost - My interest in this series unfortunately waned right before fervent fandom spiked. I don’t have any specific complaints that come to mind about what I saw; I just sort of drifted and then stayed away. Teachers I liked and peers I spent time with were starting to latch on to the show and I couldn’t find even the slightest inclination to give it a second try. However, did I still dutifully read all the latest installments in my friend’s Sawyer Ford and Kate Austen fanfiction when she passed me handwritten copies at lunch? Sure. I was glad it made her happy, even if I was no longer a viewer. 

5. Hemlock Grove - I say this as someone who still mourns the fates of some characters in this show, so I wouldn’t go so far as to claim that the series stopped being able to make me feel anything. I’m just of the opinion that, in some ways, it might’ve been better off stopping at one season. That’s where the book it was based on ends, and things just didn’t feel as cohesive after that. Season 3 especially was - borrowing from my above review of Under the Dome - not a great time. That being said, there are also certain elements from the book that I could’ve done without in the Season 1 adaptation but... well... here we are. 

Top 5 Underrated TV Shows

1. Picnic at Hanging Rock - Another one that won’t surprise followers of this blog. I have rhapsodized about it quite frequently since I found it a little over a month ago. It’s a period piece mystery miniseries with LGBTQIA+ representation, gorgeous costumes, and Samara Weaving. This felt specifically designed to wedge its way into my heart, and I’m quite content with the space it now occupies.

2. Dark - I’m so intrigued by the overlapping timelines with all of the morally gray characters. It’s possible to like one of these people in the timeline where they’re young but dislike them as adults, or vice versa. It also makes me think of Rant by Chuck Palahniuk a little tiny bit with the idea that time travel, specifically tampering with your own timeline, might make you physically and behaviorally unrecognizable to yourself. And the SONG CHOICES! I have gotten some solid new music selections from this series. 

3. Sense8 - I still need to watch the finale. I really do. But I knew it would make me sad so I’ve avoided it for... two years now? Pretty close, I think. The concept is fascinating and the cast is so strong. Plus the cinematography! They came up with some of the coolest ways to depict the link these characters share and what it’s like when they connect over distance. The planning and careful editing it all must’ve taken... I remain in awe. 

4. Penny Dreadful - There were definitely some story/writing choices I didn’t particularly like along the way, but I did get engrossed in the creepy goodness and the performances -- Eva Green’s Vanessa Ives most of all. It left me wishing for more period piece “monster mash” stories, because having all those classic characters in one place was a blast. It also helped me understand why Helen McCrory was once slated to play Bellatrix Lestrange because she can be terrifying. Oh and Sarah Greene in her Wild West outfits? Perdita Weeks with short red hair in fencing garb, and later in all leather with boots and a long jacket? I WAS NOT PREPARED AND I HAVE STILL NOT RECOVERED. I NEVER WILL.

5. Wonderfalls - There’s some cringe-inducing handling of certain representation in the series, but I have such a weak spot for quippy outcasts who become reluctant chosen ones (Joan Girardi in Joan of Arcadia, Wynonna Earp, Jaye Tyler in this series, et cetera). I also really love the sibling dynamics here. They bicker, tease one another, help each other out of trouble, and have rare but genuine heart-to-hearts. Caroline, Lee, and Katie all did such a great job blending their characters’ adult personalities with certain childhood attributes that rise to the surface in the presence of family.  

Top 5 Movies

1. Addams Family Values - I’ve rewatched this movie at least once annually since I found it in Media Play at age 13. Usually, I’ll play it around Halloween or, at the latest, Thanksgiving. It’s mouth-along-with-every-line level ingrained in my memory. I find myself leaning forward in my seat before favorite parts because I’m still that excited to relive them. Why this movie, and why this devotion to such a degree? It’s hard to explain, even to myself. I can tell you, however, that I hold up every other portrayal of the Addams characters to the versions found in this. Everybody in the cast just feels that perfect for their part. 

2. Clue - I was already pretty fond of this movie to begin with, but then my sister got older and claimed it as a favorite of her own, so now she just supplies me with further excuses to watch it repeatedly. It’s also been a bonding piece of media with a couple of close friends and such through the years. It’s incredible to think not everyone in it was the first choice for their roles; what everybody brings to the table is so top-notch that I wouldn’t have it any other way. I also LOVE knowing that it originally went to theaters with different endings depending on which showing you attended. I gather people weren’t terribly thrilled with the stunt back then, but I kinda think some moviegoers would be into that approach these days? Then again, one hit that tried something different tends to start a fad, so maybe I’d end up regretting the suggestion after a while. :P

3. The Craft - This. Movie. Yes, Act III is a major bummer even though I know it’s coming, and I’ll always wish it ended differently. Even so. This. Movie. I tend to headcanon mostly for shows and sometimes books, but The Craft is a beloved exception. I love so much about it: the magic, the music, the clothes, the settings, the dynamics within the friend group, the performances. I had no idea when I first got the DVD at 17 that it would become such a part of my life, but I’m so glad it found its way to me. 

4. Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion - The soundtrack is a glorious ’80s and ’90s treat for my ears. The colorful costumes are perfectly suited to the main characters’ version of the world. There are so many great lines and it feels like everyone is having a lot of fun in their roles. I LOVE HEATHER MOONEY SO MUCH. She’s my awful, scathingly sarcastic, little grungy grump and she fills my heart with joy. 

5. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King - I was pretty sure at least one of the three had to appear on here. I think, if I were to tally them all up, The Return of the King features most of my favorite moments, so it wins the spot. “I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you!”, ‘Edge of Night,’ Éowyn in battle, The Army of the Dead, ‘Into the West’... I end up crying during the end credits every time. So, yeah, ultimately, I would choose the third part of the trilogy if I could only watch one. 

Phew, that’s it! All the questions answered, all the shows and movies listed! Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read it all, and thanks again to @monaiargancoconutsoy for sending in the prompts! <3

[jadejedi]

So You Hate The Last Jedi (part four)

Part One- Theme     Part Two- Luke    Part Three- Rey     Part Four- Finn

Part Four- Finn

Okay, this section will deal with Finn. While I’ve already discussed a lot of the main complaints surrounding Finn’s story in TLJ, specifically regarding Canto Bight, I still have a couple of things to circle back to from the first two parts of this stupid long argument about a movie that came out two and half years ago. I want to start out by saying that while I do enjoy the Canto Bight part of the movie, I do acknowledge that the pacing is a little (or a lot) off. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t value in it. 

First of all, the Canto Bight plotline doesn’t just tie in to the theme of failure, it also connects into the theme of dealing with a collective dark history. It serves to remind us that the galaxy is not a pretty place. It is full of corruption, to this day. It reminds us that in order to truly succeed, these corrupting elements must be dealt with and acknowledged. The prequels, and the Clone Wars tv show especially, pull back the curtain on the GFFA’s dark side (pardon the pun) of institutional corruption. It’s not just that Palpatine was evil, it was that the whole Republic was corrupt, even before he was elected Chancellor. 

I mean, any system where a trade conglomerate like the Trade Federation has literal representation in the Senate, especially while other groups don’t have official representation, like the Gungans, is pretty corrupt. (Does Jar-Jar even have any power when Padmé is there? What is the point of his position??)

Any attempt by the New Republic to form a post-Imperial government without dealing with the corruption of the old Republic would only lead to a repeat of history, which is exactly what happens. That’s why it was important for Finn to see that *this* is the evil at the core of the galaxy. Not just the Empire, or the First Order, but the system that allows them to continue to operate and flourish. Theoretically, this should have set him up for an arc in episode IX where he does in some way deal with this, or confront someone about this corruption, maybe Leia or something, but whatever. 

Okay, moving on to the next complaint. So, why were Rose and Finn separated from Poe and Rey the whole movie? They’re the trio, right? They should be together.

Well, look back at the second episode in the other two trilogies. Obi-Wan is separated from Padmé and Anakin, and Luke is separated from Han and Leia. So it shouldn’t be surprising that the trio is split up for this movie. While in the previous two trilogies the romantically involved couple was together, it’s unclear if Disney ever meant for Finn and Rey to end up together, and they DEFINITELY didn’t intend for Finn and Poe to end up together, and wonderful as either of those scenarios are. So it makes sense for them to all be split up.

Also, as discussed in Just Write’s video that I mentioned in part one, the three main characters, Finn, Poe, and Rey all have their respective individual conflicts personified by the characters around them. Finn has Rose and DJ, Poe has Leia and Holdo, and Rey has Luke and Ren. They are all being pulled in two directions, between their wants and needs. To be honest, this movie has some of the most fleshed out and developed character arcs and themes of the entire Star Wars Saga. All three characters have a clear start point and end point, clear wants and needs, and a clear impact on the story. 

While it may have been possible to have this while having the trio together, I think it was theoretically smart to separate them, have them grow as characters, before chucking them back together to fully actualize in the final movie. It’s not Rian Johnson’s fault that didn’t happen.

So, I’ve already mentioned a bit that the three trilogies echo each other (or as George would say, it’s like poetry, it rhymes), and that really comes into play with Finn. I have a theory, as in a theoretical framework, not as in a hunch, about the trios of Star Wars, and I’m sure others have discussed this, I just haven’t seen anyone using these terms. In my theory, there are three archetypes repeated in the trios of each trilogy. These roles are not about personality, but about narrative function. First and most obvious, The Chosen One. The one with the special destiny and the special powers. Luke, Anakin, and Rey. Next, the Established Politician/Believer, who already has a connection to the main ‘good guy’ political force. Leia, Padmé, and Poe. And finally, the Doubter. The Doubter has doubts. Doubts about the Chosen one, doubts about the political entity or the established politician, or any combination of the above. Han, Obi-Wan, Finn. This lines up very nicely because each of the members of the ST trio spend a large amount of time with their OT counterpart, throughout the first two movies especially.

So, Finn is the Han character. At the beginning of their respective trilogies, they have doubts about the rebellion/resistance, but save the Chosen One because of their established friendship. Finn goes to Starkiller base to rescue Rey, and Han saves Luke from getting shot down on the Death Star run. 

Now, by the end of both of these movies, The Force Awakens and A New Hope, Finn and Han have no actual connection to the Resistance/Rebellion. They are both there for their friends, not because they believe in any cause (despite what Solo would tell you). 

However, in the OT, Han just gets left there. ESB picks up three years later, and Han is deeply involved in the Rebellion, including having a military rank, if I remember correctly. He leaves, but not because he doesn’t believe in the Rebellion’s cause, but because there’s a price on his head. We don’t get to see the character development that got him to that point, and is probably why Harrison Ford didn’t find him to be a particularly interesting character. 

With Finn, on the other hand, we do get to see that intermediate step. We get to see him radicalized, from someone who is just fighting to save his friends, to someone who believes in and fights for a cause. I LOVE that arc. It makes Finn a 100000% more complex and interesting character than Han, IMO, and would have set him up perfectly to, say, lead a stormtrooper revolution in IX. It seemed like he was being set up to take a really large leading man/leadership role, but again that didn’t happen.

So, if his story arc was about being radicalized, then why did it not end with him dying in a blaze of glory? (I know that this isn’t a problem that everyone had with the movie, but I’ve seen it enough to address it.)

Well, first of all, Star Wars isn’t the kind of saga that really seems to buy into the whole ‘heroic sacrifice’ narrative. Now, I want to state that there is nothing inherently wrong with sacrificing yourself for a just cause or whatever. BUT, a lot of what I’ve seen around the whole ‘Rose should have let Finn sacrifice his life’ argument reminds more of what Umberto Eco calls in his essay “Ur-Fascism,” ‘the cult of heroism’, and the ‘cult of death’. In fascism, believers are taught that, first of all, everyone is a hero. Everyone is basically trained to die. Dying is seen not just as an unfortunate consequence of the fight, but as the reward for the fight. 

And that’s kind of what this whole argument around Finn’s sacrifice felt like to me. Rose didn’t ‘steal’ anything from Finn. She literally saved his life. Because there is no glory in dying for a cause. It can be a necessity, but especially in Star Wars, seeing war and death as some sort of search for glory is frowned upon. 

In Empire Strikes Back Yoda states, “War does not make one great.”

In the season one episode of the Clone Wars, Trespass, Senator Chuchi says, “To die for one’s people is a great sacrifice. To live for one’s people, an even greater sacrifice.”

And as Rose explains, “That’s how we’re going to win. Not fighting what we hate. Saving what we love.” 

In Star Wars, it is the fighting and living for a cause that is more heroic than needlessly dying for it. Because, it would have been needless and pointless for Finn to die. Yeah, that cannon would have been destroyed, but eventually the First Order’s forces would have gotten through. The Resistance was still hugely outnumbered. Plus, do we really want one of the franchise's few black heroes dying? I sure don’t. And, as has been mentioned on this website before, Star Wars is a fairytale. It’s supposed to end with the main trio living happily ever after. 

And, as I will talk about in the final part, this decision to not go through with the suicide mission was a big part of Poe’s character arc. 

[whitewolfofwinterfell]

How do you like Mad Men so far? I never know how to feel about it, I really had high hopes for Betty, but was disappointed at the overall lack of character development/focus on her in season 2 and onwards! But I was generally happy about Peggy and Joan. And Don is quite the intricate & complex character (at least in the first couple seasons), but the level of detail and accurate depiction of the time is really well done and so fun to watch! Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year!!! :)

Hey there, anon! I just finished watching Season 4 Episode 7, which was an amazing episode, so it’s quite fitting that I’d get an ask like this.

Mad Men had been on my ‘To Watch’ list for years because it seemed to be considered a timeless classic along with shows like The Sopranos, The Wire and Breaking Bad. I finally got around to it because one of my mutuals (shoutout to @sulietsexual​) recently finished watching it and when I started seeing posts about it on my dash it gave me that push to finally commit to watching it.

So far I really like Mad Men. It’s very specific in its style, which means that it might not be everybody’s cup of tea. I didn’t know that much about it before I started watching and it is quite a lot different than I expected. It’s unlike a lot of other shows because it’s very character driven. There are character arcs and sub-plots related to the characters careers and personal lives, however, there’s no overarching plot across the seasons and no central story. It’s completely devoted to the evolution of the characters, but since I’m such a character orientated person, that works out fantastically for me. I believe the best thing any show can have is a cast of diverse, complex and well-written characters, and Mad Men certainly has that.

In addition to the character focus, the other main element of the show is definitley the decade that it’s set in, which is of course the 1960s. For me, the decade is a character within itself, because it’s such a rich period in American history. It’s not just about the aesthetics with the fashion, hairstyles, cars and media, it’s the fact that Mad Men manages to capture the spirit of the 1960s so well. And I think if the show was set in any other time-frame it wouldn’t work half as well. That specific period presents challenges for the characters (the female characters, in particular) and shapes everything that is happening in the world of advertising, and consequently what happens to and around the characters.

Surprisingly, I didn’t know the show was set in the 60s until I started watching, but it was a very pleasant surprise for me. As a history student, American history was one of my favourite areas of history, I even specialised in 1960s America. When I got to my final year and had to start planning my dissertation I knew almost immediately that I wanted to write it on 1960s America, I just didn’t know which part. As I said, it’s such a rich decade of history where so much happened: the Civil Rights Movement, MLK’s assassination, JFK’s assassination, Malcom X’s assassination, the Vietnam War, and the Cold War. There was such huge political, social and cultural change; there was a growth in social movements not just for African Americans but other racial minority groups such as Latin Americans and Chinese Americans, women and LGBTQ groups. The rise of rock ‘n roll came about (Elvis, The Beatles etc.) and with it a new kind of rebellion expressed through the art of music. The introduction of and access to the contraceptive pill gave women more sexual freedom, later followed by the “Summer of Love”. This was a decade where anything felt possible; where man landed on the moon and a president was assassinated in broad day light; where groups of people across America stood together, challenged the status quo, fought for what they believed in, dreamed big and strived for positive change for the millions of Americans that had been suppressed and voiceless for decades. It proved just how powerful unity can be and how citizens can truly have an impact and drive political and social change if they have the courage to stand up. The 1960s changed America in significant ways and was such a decisive period in its history. I could continue talking about this all day, because I bloody love it, but the point is that this period of history is a personal favourite of mine and so seeing the characters live through this time makes it particularly enjoyable for me.

As much as I love the character-centred approach of the show, at times I do think it suffers from the lack of plot and can feel very slow. Sometimes I don’t really have motivation to watch an episode for this reason. This becomes more noticeable when the characters I’m most invested in don’t get as much screen-time. Betty is a classic example of this. Just like you, I adore Betty’s character but I’ve been so diappointed with how she’s been cast aside. So far, she hasn’t featured in season 4 at all and based on what you’ve said, I’m guessing she probably won’t get much focus or development in seasons 5-7. There’s also the issue that character focus and development doesn’t always feel consistent. As the lead, Don obviously gets the most focus, but other characters like Pete, Roger, Joan, Peggy, Betty, Sally etc. sometimes get a few episodes where they get a lot of attention and development, then they disappear or are barely present for the following 5 episodes. Despite this, Mad Men, still does character development better than almost any other show and episodes like 4x07 completely blow it out of the water.

I’m only on season 4 and there’s still 3 more seasons to go, but Don is already one of the most of the complex and well-written characters from any show I’ve ever watched. There’s always something new to learn about him and he’s so multi-layered that I don’t even think I could begin to unpick his character. Peggy’s arc is inspiring and empowering. But all of the characters are well-written regardless of whether I like them on a personal level or not. However, my personal favourites at the moment are: Pete, Joan, Betty, Don and Roger. I’m intruiged to finish the series and see where these characters end up. I’ve seen a couple of spoilers and already know that I’m going to be upset with how Betty’s story ends, but hopefully the other characters I love they will have a satisfying and deserving ending to their arcs. 

I do think that there could be more diversity within the cast and dare I say it, better representation. Given the period it’s set in, it would be interesting for a POC to be a series regular. I understand that the world of the “Mad Men” is one of white men and white priveledge. So it makes sense that the only times we  see people of colour is when they’re in the background working as maids, housekeepers, janitors etc. And in those moments, they’re purposefully portrayed as being invisible to show how overlooked, excluded and inferior they are in the eyes of the characters. But in my heart of hearts, I’d still love to see even one person of colour have a genuine arc and place on the show. Sal counts as LGBTQ representation, but sadly, his time on the show was so short-lived. As I say, I know that these omissions are deliberate because the characters are all wealthy, priveleged white people who embody the very idea of the “American Dream”, but I definitley think there’s more room to have explored these themes. Race, in particular, was such a huge factor in the 1960s that it’s strange to me that it’s practically non-existent and that there are only brief mentions or scenes that give a nod to the racial context of the period (e.g. when Carla is listening to MLK’s ‘I Have a Dream’ speech on the radio).

Mad Men also knows how to write relationships well, which I suppose is an extension of the characters. It’s strange, because I don’t ship anybody on the show because every single relationship is toxic, unequal or volatile in some way, but every single relationship is completely authentic. There’s no epic romances that are pushed in our faces or over-dramatised and cliche; every relationship is human in nature. The characters cheat and they enter into casual sexual relationships and both parties know exactly what the relationship is - it’s not a “real” relationship, it’s not marriage and it’s not love - yet the couple build a companionship and understanding which adds layers to it. We see this with Roger and Joan, Pete and Peggy, and Duck and Peggy, to name a few. Even the “proper” couples like Don and Betty, Pete and Trudy, Roger and Jane, Joan and Greg, aren’t relationships that are exactly happy or built on love. I think what the show does so well is show that the big, epic, fairytale romances we see in film and television, that most of us aspire to have, don’t exist. All of these characters don’t have sex, get married or enter into relationships because they’re head over heels in love and give each other butterflies and steal each other’s breath away - it’s because they happen to be in each others’ lives and over time develop some sort of connection that evolves from being in the same space on a daily basis. It’s really that simple. 

Overall, I think the show does a fantastic job at showing the way in which humans connect and the various levels that those connections can develop and grow. Most shows show three levels of relationships: family, friendship and romance. Mad Man exceeds this massively and is one of the few shows that I feel actually realistically portrays the nature of human relationships. Not every person in our lives slots neatly into one of those boxes - family, friendship, romance. In fact, most people don’t. Human emotions, bonds and relationships are much more complex than that. And when I see relationships like Peggy and Pete or Don and Anna, those are the sort of relationships that are so complex and real, but that don’t fit into any of those boxes. 

Mad Men is certainly a good show; it’s well written and I’m enjoying it, but for me personally, it doesn’t stand out as being a show that’s going to go onto my favourites list. I still have 3 seasons to go, so that might change, but stylistically it’s not my ideal kind of show. I love the character-orientated approach, but I do think that the lack of plot lets it down. I like to have a real story to get invested in but Mad Men just doesn’t really have one. 

So, those are my thoughts on the show so far. With any luck, I’ll finish the show over the Christmas holidays (however, I’ve become slightly preoccupied by The Witcher, oops) and will have more to share with you. 

Thank you for stopping by to ask this, anon, and I also wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

[fairestmusesismoving]

What made you decide to role play as Doc? And what has helped you with his characterization?

Doc was a character that fascinated me as a child. His bickering with Grumpy (the hen pecking) during Disney’s 1937 film delighted me. As I got older and my love for my favorite Disney film grew, I would end up amassing books about the work that went into the film, as well as commentary from animators who put the film together.It’s always been a lot of hard research. I spent money to get supplemental books (about the length of a comic book) that were released the year after the movie came out. It’s part of my collection and also fascinating to see what Doc is like and how he interacts with those he’s come to lived with. Walt Disney doesn’t quite call them brothers, but the connection does seem close enough that a loose family unit is fine. Tomato, tomato! Brothers! Disney did refer to the dwarfs as Snow White’s “adoptive family” and mentioned each was much like a father or a brother to her. This made me examine Doc’s personality, his values, and how he performs in various other mediums. I’ve even went as far to track down translated Disney comics that heavily feature The Seven Dwarfs and their life after Snow White lives in the castle. There are also more recent picture books and I do own a few of these. Doc tends to fall into that “father” line very quickly.This is primarily where Doc draws his personality and quirks from. Nervousness has turned into a caffeine addiction. The fatherly need to check on people is still present. He still has a short temper for select moments. “Pompous bastard” is something I throw around as much as Walt Disney did when it came to this character, but “washed up silver fox playboy” is more in the direction I’ve left him.Once Upon a Time doesn’t give us that in depth treatment so a lot of people prefer to use head canons. I do use some, but I look at the symbolism fairytales often use in them to craft Doc’s story. Eggs represent new life and renewal, thus the eggs aren’t a true hatching, they are a healing and renewal. Bossy’s constant affirmations to the dwarfs even when they immediately disprove his words are his attempts to gaslight the group. The only one he is fully successful at gaslighting is Stealthy. He is semi successful with Dreamy. The others are in a somewhat dazed state and are not sure what to make of themselves. It’s only after Dreamy becomes Grumpy that the gaslighting (let’s call it brainwashingLITE) loses hold of them and they begin to question everything around them. This isn’t a safe place. This isn’t a nurturing place. Bossy doesn’t care about them and he certainly won’t ever protect them. That sympathy was faked. I mean just to really drive it home, I have to remember Bossy exists. I loved Dreamy as an episode and Nova and Dreamy is my all time favorite ship. However I find a lot of people ignore Bossy and other script-named dwarfs who appear in this episode in order to push a hate agenda towards the Blue Fairy or insist Regina is “better” in some form while ignoring there’s clearly some bigger story going on. I’m curious and interested because the story can’t end there. There has been evidence I’ve found with talking to the actors through social media and con appearances that there were many scrapped storylines. The dwarfs had one that was abandoned. Whatever bits and pieces I can make out through props and emphasis on certain things, I will.Much of the Dreamy episode draws on a great deal of folklore that uses fairy and dwarf connections. It’s pretty interesting to read and while I don’t observe all of it, there’s a flavor of it in all of the characters I play. I had to observe a lot of episodes to just understand which dwarfs do what. I know which dwarf does a war cry (Happy), who is most rogue associated in Stealthy’s departure (Bashful and this may be the point of contention in S5), and which two that Grumpy directly mentions do potions/poisons/and other associated work (Doc and Sneezy which translates to Sneezy being a pharmacist in Storybrooke). I may not be able to quote time stamps but I’ve rewatched these episodes multiple times just to be sure I have a firm grasp on Doc, with what little lines he does have, what little action he does perform, so I can at least select some careers that would make sense for him.He’s your lovable, nervous, and a little bit of a gay dad. People aren’t supposed to pick up on that queer coding (done by very careful animators) unless they’re wise to it. I never really noticed as a kid, but it was endearing to me. Doc was one of the first characters I really hooked onto and I’m happy I did. So I’m quite a few dollars poorer and entire birthdays were spent with only Doc themed items as my gifts. It was worth it and I found out so much information. Worth it. But very happy you asked because he’s a character I’ve written for on many different mediums. Doc may keep evolving but my love for him does not.

[renegade-is-in-my-blood]

Hey. In summer 2015 my family and I went to Bulgaria. Why do I mention Bulgaria if this is supposed to be story about Dracula in Romania ?

Well as I’m from east of Slovakia on our car ride to Bulgaria we had to ride quite a journey and most off our ride was through Romania.

As a teen fascinated by popular vampires like Twilight saga, Vampire diaries, True blood or classic Bram Stoker’s Dracula I convinced my fam to make a stop and explore Romania for a bit and visit some notorious places connected to Dracula. After our online search we picked 2 places – Dracula’s castle and grave. Plan was to visit grave, stay the night at a hotel we booked ahead and continue our long drive to our final destination – Bulgaria, and on our way back visit castle, also stay the night and continue home.

But reality was slightly different.

Here is the rough distance we took from our place to Bulgaria:

We clearly went through a lot of Romania and unfortunately there were very few, almost no high ways and we was stuck behind trucks that were slowing us way down all the time. Because of this terrible road experience we did not have enough time to visit Dracula’s grave and we headed straight to our place for the night and continued to our holiday destination so we’ll be on time at our hotels check up.

All along our ride we could notice this incredibly marvelous houses. It would probably look luxurious in different setting , but in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by pretty much nothing it looked so odd. We could see 5-7 of this fairytale houses in a row and then just road and fields. It was not even like a village cuz there would be no other buildings just this huge houses. I also noticed them in bigger towns as well. It was still very spectacular to look at them.

We arrived safely and had amazing time in Bulgaria but I’m gonna talk about that in separate article soon.

So on our way back we had full program for one day – we wanted to visit both of attractions we planed and stay the night in Romania as well.

Let’s talk about Dracula for a while. Ofc we were not looking for actual Transylvanians vampires but tracking the life of Vlad III/ Vlad the Impaler/ Vlad Dracula – ruler of Wallachia. Vlad’s life and especially his cruelty inspired famous Bram Stoker in his novel Dracula which added great popularity to this historical figure. Not that he needed any more popularity I mean this dude was not called impaler just for a fun. This guy was impaling people through their rectum all the way up ( I once saw this brutal documentary where scientists were testing if it was possible that the victims of this kind of piecing could actually survive several days while being impaled as legends tell (spoiler alert – they could but it required a great amount of skills)), dipping bread in his enemies blood while dining near their dead bodies (allegedly – who can really tell)

I once saw this documentary explaining why legend of vampires came from countries like Romania or  Bulgaria.  I don’t remember the dates or name of the plague but to explain it simply, somehow dead people were not actually dead and they were waking up in their graves and dying horrible death, so to prevent this you had to imply them with a stick to make sure they are actually dead. I guess not everyone was familiar with this. Also they were making very shallow graves for their dead so when the float came and brought up the dead implied with the stick – obviously people freak and the legends begun.

There’s a bunch of articles about Vlad and his life if you’re curious for more.

Truth remains Vlad Dracula’s sadism and Stokers book are great for Romania’s tourism.

  We had all of the directions in our GPS so it was easy to find the place while we were in a car. Turns out the grave of Vlad – Comana Monastery is in the middle of lake on a small island. What surprised me the most was the lack of people,  I assumed we would just follow other tourist and won’t have to do such search on our own.

And the strangeness just began.

We came to this island where we could see the towers of the monastery and small pavement leading to it. When we came closer we met this family that were clearly residents as they were all in their comfy home clothes just chilling in front of their house right next to the monastery. The had this 2 small dogs that were laying in the heat on the grass. I remember this 2 old ladies, probably grandmas, small kids and one middle-aged lady all staring at us as we just entered their property in the middle of the day. I still have no idea what really went on cuz the weirdness was just too much. We quickly considered leaving but decided to go on and see what happens. The lady came to us and of course she did not speak english, nor could we speak Romanian, but somehow we let here know that we’re looking for Dracula’s tomb. She understood and led us to the monastery, actually unlocked the door with a key from her pocket in font of us – obviously there were no other tourist beside us.

We wanted to ask how much is for the ticket and lady handed us paper where she wrote the number (as it was easier to understand the number that just words) but it was in Romanian currency called lei, and all we had was Bulgarians lev and euros. Lady picked up calculator and paper with all of currency written on it. I guess she was not very good at math at school cuz the price she wanted for ticket to see the monastery – where we were already standing and it was  just this one room – was over 1000 euros. We laughed and tried explain to her that it must be a mistake that  she can’t charge 1000 euros for this place, so she was calculating it again and again for several minutes and the language barrier was making this all so hard for both of us. It turned out to be 10 euros in the end but no one can be really sure so my dad gave here like 20 euros just in case and joined us – while we already seen everything there was.

It looked like any other orthodox church in our place, gold, pictures of saints, mosaics, crosses and on the ground simple grey rectangle with picture of Vlad III and I guess there was a candle on the ground and that was it – that was the tomb.

We did not take any photos as we figured it was forbidden as lady just said “no” and pointed to our camera. She actually tried to tell us something about this place using hands instead of words and it was like playing charades. From what we guessed she was telling us about tunnels that was underneath the monastery, and Vlad was probably hiding there at some point, and most interesting part was when she “told” us that this was grave of Vlad’s headless body. Dracula’s head is buried in some other place but I might have guessed her gestures all wrong.

What was most fascinating for me was the strange feeling of this place AND (!!)   there were satanic looking symbols all over the holly pictures and walls painted  with deep dark reddish color.

It was creepy as hell. And I’m really not making this up even when this was 3 years ago ( i could never forget this) me and my sisters were just checking them all like what the fuck is that. There were pentagrams, stars, birds and other animals just simple ornaments all over the lower parts of walls on this place and it remind me of literally any episode of TV show called Supernatural ( cool show I would recommend  watching if you’re into creepy horror like theme but it has like 20 series and I got bored after half of it) I tried to search for it online but I can’t seem to find the proof of my words anywhere. It might be just local vandals or something but it was odd like this whole experience.

BTW how cool is this family – imagine you have Dracula buried in your backyard. Forget the part about  the vampire stuff  but you have a guy who’s famous for his sadism buried in your backyard. Forget about that as well but you have your country’s ruler’s headless body buried in your backyard. This family is wild.

  All of our Dracula’s grave visit took us around 15 minutes and we wet out, sat in a car and headed to Dracula’s castle – Castle Bran

Storm was coming, air got thicker the closer we got, dark clouds and Dracula’s castle in the distance. This image looks like straight out of Dracula’s novel:

As I mentioned – great for tourism – the closer we got the more of this gift shop we saw alongside the roads.

Make sure you remember the opening hours to this castle – or any other place you want to visit – otherwise you’ll be standing 5 minutes after closing hours like we did. We missed it. So we adjusted the plan again – we had dinner under the castle, checked out some souvenirs and headed to our place for the night. We stayed with some locals that offer a room, or whole floor in our case for tourists. It’s much cheaper and feels more at home than hotel.

  We tried it again in the morning – opening hours of Bran castle 9:00 – 19:00 – price 15 euros. The place was lovely , lot of tourists though. There were huge gardens underneath the castle and you had to climb you way up to the castle.

  Insides had quite small ceilings, so someone as tall as my dad would need to be very careful. You could find descriptions and stories in every room in different languages. Old rooms, displays of fashion, weapons, furniture, combs, torture instruments and incredible view – here are some photos:

  Fun fact: even thought its famous as Dracula’s castle – actual Vlad Dracula spend there only very short period. All of the tourists are there for the place where Bran Stokers novel occurs. And tourism is benefiting – I myself got shit ton of Dracula’s souvenirs.

To be fair I was not as thrilled about this castle. Being from middle europe I’m very well familiar with castles or monasteries as we have a lot of them in my country and since I was a kid I took family or school trips to almost every of them. And in the end they all start to look the same (sorry) I’m sure it would be fascinating for someone who never visited such place – it was just nothing new for me. And the connection to Dracula was very little – his tomb was at least creepy and I would never forget that but I can hardly remember the castle now.

I would still recommend both places as they were both very interesting and memorable experiences for me.

Thank you so much for your attention

xo Natalia

Visiting Dracula in Romania Hey. In summer 2015 my family and I went to Bulgaria. Why do I mention Bulgaria if this is supposed to be story about Dracula in Romania ?

[theonceoverthinker]

OUAT 2X14 - Manhattan

I don’t have a pun for this time, but I wanted to say that this is probably one of the episodes that I was the most excited to cover for this rewatch for a few reasons. First, I haven’t watched it since my initial watch of the series so apart from the broad strokes of the story, I’ve forgotten a great deal of it. Second, it’s one of the biggest and best received episodes of the season from a General Audiences standpoint from what I understand. Third, I’ve never had a real opinion on Neal because I binged Seasons 2 and 3, so this episode will provide me the opportunity to do just that! Finally, it takes place in New York and who doesn’t love New York!

...Don’t answer that! Anyway, I hope you’ll read my review of this episode which is just under the cut, so I’ll CUT to the chase. Ha! Turns out I did have a pun in me! Okay! Let’s get started!

Press Release While Mr. Gold, Emma and Henry go in search of Gold’s son Bae in New York, Cora, Regina and Hook attempt to track down one of Rumplestiltskin’s most treasured possessions. Meanwhile, in the fairytale land that was, Rumplestiltskin realizes his destiny while fighting in the Ogres War. General Thoughts - Characters/Stories/Themes and Their Effectiveness Past We gotta talk about the forking Seer and how she relates to Rumple. First, on a strictly aesthetic level, look at the way that the Seer moves her hands as she asks for water! It looks a bit like how Rumple moves his hands when he gets the Seer’s powers. Also, even her voice is sing-songy in the scene as per the captions, matching Rumple’s. Second, on a more narrative level, it’s really interesting to examine just how much of the Seer ended up becoming part of Rumple. When we see Rumple first become the Dark One, while manipulative at times, because said manipulation happens with Bae as a child, it’s played as more of manipulation that any authority figure could conceivably do cranked up to 11. And when he’s not with Bae and he’s dealing with others, he’s blunter, not as cunning as he grows to be later. But the Seer, like him in later flashbacks, picks upon more vulnerable parts of Rumple’s psyche, like how she brings up Milah and Rumple’s fears of his past and cowardice.

So I know that there are some complaints about Rumple’s discussed reasoning for turning back from the Ogres Wars was changed to being about Bae to about Rumple’s cowardice, and I actually couldn’t disagree more. This entire flashback’s setup isn’t about Rumple’s excitement to be a father, but about how he is more scared than he realizes of fighting and dying in the war. That’s how, as I mentioned before, the Seer initially gets him: by mentioning his father’s cowardice and his desire to stray away from that path. In the next flashback scene, Rumple shows much more explicit fear at those harmed in the war and one of the most poignant lines from that scene is about praying for a quick death and the final words he says to what he thinks is the Seer is “and I’m gonna die.” I honestly feel like this was a revelation that was always supposed to come out. It doesn’t lessen Rumple’s love for Bae or that that loves is any less powerful, for he wants to live for Bae, but from a story perspective, the main throttle of Rumple’s decision to harm himself does lean more towards cowardice. Hell, even Milah hits the ball on the head: “You left because you were AFRAID.”

“It will require a curse -- a curse powerful enough to rip everyone from this land.” Note that the Seer says this as Rumple’s asking for the truth about him finding his son to be revealed. I feel like people forget about this line and how it pertains to Rumple’s journey back to Bae. Many in the fandom (Myself included) mock Rumple for needing a curse to traverse realms while there are many other ways to travel them as revealed over the course of the series. Now, I get that yeah, to an extent, that’s true. New magical MacGuffins are introduced so that new characters can be introduced and so that we can see our current cast battle the fairytale elements with their modern mindsets and emotional problems (I personally find it more annoying when it’s mocked to the point where it’s used as an actual story critique, forking Cinema Sins and the mentality they’ve introduced for many who criticise films over minute details rather than how the work functions as a story -- this is why you will never see me take a point off for a plot hole). But back on topic, Rumple was told by both the Blue Fairy and now the Seer that he’d need a curse to get back to Bae, and so he kept that in mind. Present I know that a major point of contention is Emma not telling Neal about Henry when he brought up the idea of something good coming of their relationship, and I think it’s more of a complicated situation, one akin to both her initial lie to Henry in “True North” and her decisions in “Fruit of the Poisonous Tree,” where to say that something is objectively right or wrong is missing the point. Yes, Emma shouldn’t have lied and the episode is very explicit with how that was the wrong decision. However, look at what she’s dealing with. A vulnerable time in her life is now being further bastardized with the knowledge that it was all a conspiracy and while I like Neal, he didn’t exactly broach the subject with tactful bedside manner, instead trying to rationalize something so personal and painful to her. Also, I want to point out how Emma on some level knows this. That’s why she calls Mary Margaret in the very next present scene. But she doesn’t do the right thing. Look, this isn’t the easiest episode to be an Emma fan during, and I know that well. And I swear, I’m doing my best to keep my fan goggles off, but I’m not going to pretend that it’s not a nuanced situation when it is. And finally, Emma is chewed out for her decision. Henry gives her a “Reason You Suck Speech,” calling her just as bad as Regina, a line that hurts but is justified and given with an appropriate level of painfulness from an eleven year old. And even her initial apology isn’t enough.

So, that first confrontation between Rumple and Neal. Wow. What I like about Neal as he pertains to Rumple is that he immediately gives Rumple no leniency. I talked about this briefly during my review of “The Return,” but this is such an important distinction to Rumple’s other biggest loved one, Belle, who has somewhat looser parameters. From the second Neal sees Rumple again, he’s blunt about his intentions and exactly what he thinks about what Rumple’s capable of. I don’t want to say that there’s no love there, but it is pushed back in terms of Neal’s priorities, buried under decades of bitterness. And at the same time, while full of love, Rumple is still using his old tricks to get Neal to talk to him. He leverages his deal with Emma for more time to talk to him and while it works, it only serves to get more ire out of Neal. Rumple’s apology is likewise undeniably sincere, but the manner in which it is both gotten and attempted to be implemented completely miss the point that the anger produced can’t be healed so easily. I mean, just look at Neal’s face when he says that there’s magic in Storybrooke. Every benefit of every doubt is abandoned like the Stiltskin boys across portals. That having been said, with three minutes of time for an apology, I feel like we almost got more out of Rumple’s apology to August in “The Return” than we did here. Where are the tears? Why isn’t Rumple saying as much as he possibly can? It’s not enough to take points off or anything, but this meeting is partially what the first season and a half were building towards, and I kind of wanted more umph to it. That also having been said, I get that because Neal is a different person from August’s rendition of him entirely, of course the reactions are going to be different, and Neal’s speech after he’s done talking blows the conversation away. Credit to Michael Raymond James because in this scene, he completely kept up with Robert Carlyle, and that’s not always an easy feat, especially in such an emotionally charged scene. Insights - Stream of Consciousness -It is so bizarre to see Rumple and Milah happy. It’s a great contrast to how bad things got between them and is a great show of how Rumple’s cowardice really affected Milah, turning her from someone who looked so content into the miserable woman from the flashback in “The Crocodile.” All throughout the scene, they’re so dopey-eyed and in-sync towards the end. I honestly would love to read a fic where they managed to come to terms with their past and maybe be able to forgive each other, and I know I’m alone in this, but there is a story there. -”My weaving days are over.” *thinks about how in roughly 250 years, he goes by Weaver* Suuuuuure, Rumple. -Okay, seeing an adorably excited non-Dark One non-present timeline Rumple is just the best. Robert Caryle really shows Rumple’s youth here, excited, bouncy, full of music and light. It’s an honest job and plays against the cowardly spinster we see in “Desperate Souls,” the blunter Mr. Gold and the silly, but frightening Dark One version of Rumple, it makes for such a unique contrast! -Milah also gets such a unique contrast in another respect, being the more cautious half of the relationship compared to how she is after Rumple arrives home. -”But to the world?” So, when in the series finale, the idea of “the Rumplestiltskin the world will remember” came up and kept being echoed like it was this important thing, I felt that it kind of came out of nowhere because I hadn’t ever seen Rumple concerned with his legacy beyond the more isolated well being of his children, grand and great-grandchildren, and wife. However, as I hear this line, it makes a bit more sense to me, especially because this is the same episode that discussed the Henry prophecy, which was also touched upon in the series finale. -So, Rumple does that bug-eyed thing that I complained about in the last episode, but here, because the confrontation between Rumple and Bae is impending and is isolated as the main reason for his concern, it works sooo well! -Killian, thank you for breaking up that horrible mother/daughter moment! -”Names are what I traffic in, but sadly, no.” This line cracked me up! XD -”I’m not answering anything until you tell me the truth.” That’s a pretty solid rule of thumb, Emma. Neal’s definitely no villain, but just going forward, that’s a good mindset to have! -”I am the only one allowed to be angry here!” She’s got a point, Neal. You’re not really explaining yourself in a way that you’d be justified in being angry. -I love spotting bloopers as they’re happening. It’s like the OUAT version of finding Hidden Mickeys! -”My son’s been running away for a long time now.” When?! He ran away ONCE and he wasn’t even trying to run from you. He was trying to take you with him, in fact! Did you forget that?! -Henry and Rumple get a great scene! -I know you’re Baelfire.” Fun fact, last year at NJ con, I got this question wrong in the true/false game. But now I know the truth, and I’m coming for you again, Jersey! -Gotta give all the credit in the world to Jennifer Morrison here. There’s so much pain in her voice as Neal’s revealing the truth to Emma and Jen just captures how Emma’s barely holding her shirt together because now even more of her life has been shown to be a lie, and this time, a more vulnerable memory has been made even worse because of this new knowledge. -”To remind myself never to trust someone again.” That is such a tragic line. Even as Storybrooke has done a major job of changing Emma’s mindset in that regard, you do still see bits of that distrust in her personality. That’s why I like the concept of Emma’s walls being a constant in the series. -”You’ll never have to see me again.” Neal, you do know that your father is clearly still chasing you, right? You think he’s gonna give up so soon? -I like how as Rumple agreeing to watch the Seer, you can already see that his face has fallen and that he’s grown more haggard, showing some of that fear already striking him now that some of the initial adrenaline has worn off and the reality of the war is settling in. -”Who are you?” Jeez Belle, why not say “hi” like a decent person? -Regina, you know, instead of playing The Sorcerer’s Apprentice, it could be easier to, you know, look in her bag instead. -David, Thanksgiving with your family would be the best thing EVER! -Apparently, Bae learned to be a locksmith from Rumple. Neat! -Another great use of the weather from OUAT! The snow really helps to accentuate the dire straits of the war and is just adds a nice bit of texture to the scene so that it’s not just dirt against a night sky. -On the opposite end, Rumple hurting himself, especially as someone who is overcoming some serious orthopedic issues right now, is so uncomfortable to watch. Rumple’s screams actually gave me shudders. -As if I didn’t have enough reasons to praise the living daylights out of Robert Carlyle, just look at the moments when he enters Neal’s apartment. It’s the first glimpse that he gets of everything his son went through as a result of his actions and it’s subtly heartbreaking. -To add to this Robert Carlyle acting chain, his eyes as he screams “tell me” is forking hysterical! -Rumple’s splint makes me so uncomfortable. Go see a better doctor! -”A strong name!” Rumple straight up indignation as he says that cracks me the fork up! -I like Milah’s buildup of frustration as Rumple arrives home. At first, she’s almost smiling as she tells Rumple Bae’s name, but as she quickly confronts him and learns the facts, she gets angrier until we see the beginnings of the misery that sets off “The Crocodile.” I also want to note that Milah’s anger is for Bae’s sake, not for her own like in “The Crocodile,” and I think that is such an important distinction. A lot of people condemn Milah for her choice to leave Bae and my degree of agreement with that statement varies if you’re asking me to view it in terms of her choice as an individual vs comparisons with other characters, but I think it’s important to show that love for Bae. -forking hell. Die, Cora! -I think I do enough of a job complimenting the effects team to be able to laugh at the New York backdrop during Emma and Henry’s conversation. -I ADORE the design of the Seer, by the way. The stitched up face and the eyeballs on her hands is just so cool! -It’s interesting to note that the last scene of the flashback happens after the events of “The Crocodile’s” flashback, as Rumple states that his wife ran away, and not “died.” -Rumple, to quote a magnificent show of great quality, “If you could gaze into the future, you’d think that life would be a breeze, seeing trouble from a distance, but it’s not that easy. I try to save the situation, then I end up misbehaving. Oh-oh-o-o-o-oh!” (I’ll write a ficlet for the first person to tell me what I’m referencing). -”Okay. I get it. We’re all messed up.” *Takes a deep breath* Ookay, Neal. You sent Emma to jail, and while it may have helped break the curse, it also put her through some serious shirt. You don’t get to make light of that. -”In time, you will work it all out.” Yeah, about 250 years, but he does get there, and it’s pretty freakin’ awesome when he does! Arcs - How are These Storylines Progressing? Rumple finding his son - I probably should’ve listed this as an arc long ago, but I forgot. In any case, Rumple finally found him! The journey from the start of the series here was a fantastically well done one! I feel like it never dragged or took any longer or shorter than the season and a half that it ended up lasting. And now, it kind of gets a second life. Rumple is now physically with his son, but emotionally couldn’t be further from him, and we get to see Rumple trying to bridge that gap. I don’t remember liking this part of it, but on concept alone, it’s so fascinating to see that next step. Emma lying to Henry - I like that Emma gets to have a flawed moment with Henry and that Henry actually reacts to it so negatively. For a season and a half now, Emma’s been Henry’s hero so of course when she not only lies, but to such an extent, he’s going to have a bad reaction because he’s put her on a pedestal. Not only is it an interesting character moment for Henry, but as I mentioned before, it’s a good job on the narrative’s part in punishing Emma for her lie. Favorite Dynamic Rumple and Henry. To be honest, Neal and Rumple should absolutely go here, but their entire conversation is more story based, and I talked about them ad nauseum up in that category, so why not highlight another dynamic? Rumple and Henry are so supportive and kind to each other here, and it feels like both good foreshadowing of their familial relationship, a show of the progress both characters had made thus far when it comes to how they treat their loved ones, and a tragic setup for not only the let down they both get from their respective loved ones, but also of the prophecy. For the latter one, for most of he episode, it felt a little weird seeing Rumple talk to Henry so softly despite knowing the prophecy. It felt a bit like him raising a pig for slaughter. However, the end of the episode makes it clear that Rumple was just now remembering the prophecy as he watched Neal and Henry bond, and it works well enough for me. Their time together in the episode is just so gentle and in an episode that’s more or less full of harsh moments (those gentle moments included in hindsight), the break that Henry and Rumple give is desperately needed. Writer Adam and Eddy are really good at writing intricate storylines. When you look at their other episode like the “Pilot,” “A Land Without Magic,” and “The Queen of Hearts,” you notice that the situation the characters are put into are never so simple. Just like someone can’t or shouldn’t be expected to straight-up hate Regina in the “Pilot,” one can’t or shouldn’t be expected to hate Emma, Neal, Henry, or Rumple here (Except Cora. We can hate Cora allllll we want), no matter who you’re a fan of. That’s because they’re careful with their framing and character work as to never let one forget their full picture. And I think that holds especially true in “Manhattan.” Culture In my intro, I said I was excited to finally get an impression of Neal for myself. When you’re in a certain shipping camp like I am (Captain Swan), Neal tends to be thrown through the ringer. Hell, even my best friend in the fandom hates him. However, when you’re as anti-salt as I am, you tend to take a lot of the shirt thrown at him with a grain of...well, salt. This is part of the reason why this rewatch appealed to me so much. I always found Neal to be pretty average in my book. I remember liking him, but not having much of a reaction to either his actions or his death in Season 3 (I also feel like I should disclose the fact that I wasn’t in either of the shipping camps throughout Neal’s entire present existence on the show), and I feel like I’d be remiss not to talk about him a bit now, especially as this is his debut present episode and affords him the most perspective.

So here goes.

I like Neal. I don’t love him. If you asked me to line up every character in the show, he’d probably end up near August, and I like August too, though not as much as major characters like Rumple, Regina, and Emma.

What’s appealing to me about Neal is his non-exaggerated blunt personality. The way he curb stomps Rumple’s apology is so in-your-face, as if to scream to an audience that already finds sympathy for Rumple that his pain matters too and it will be paid attention to. This works by keeping him a sympathetic character, but also giving him a compelling dynamic. As for Emma, that bluntness also helps, but in a way that makes Emma more sympathetic. I mentioned before that Neal’s exposition about his part in the conspiracy of sending Emma to jail was less than ideal, and it’s part of what contributes to her decision to lie about finding him. Neal is a bit of a jerk, obviously not devoid of either the heroism or love of his former selves, but it’s a character quality all the same and a good one, especially because to my memory, it stays around and is pretty organic. It paints the trauma that he’s had at the hands of the world since his abandonment as it’s such a stark contrast to his Enchanted Forest self.

Rating Golden Apple. What a great episode! It goes in with the promise of payoff for quite a few major story elements and does exactly that. It’s unwaveringly harsh in many respects, but that’s why it works as well as it does. Neal’s addition to the main cast shakes things up and provides new opportunities for characters, for as harsh as it is to watch, seeing Emma lie about Neal and be punished for it was a good narrative choice, and the flashback was utterly fantastic in its storytelling! Flip My Ship - Home of All Things “Shippy Goodness” Swan Fire - Listen to that vulnerability as Emma says Neal’s name and that happiness that Neal just can’t keep out of his voice as he says Emma’s! That’s just fantastic! Also, he keeps the dreamcatcher! Also also, that “leave her alone” was romantic as all hell! Captain Floor - I’m very pissed at myself for not mentioning the best ship ever at any point before this. Like, Killian and the Floor just belong together, and to not acknowledge that was a callous mistake on my part! My sincerest apologies to my reader base, and I beg for you not to think I’m at all an anti! ()()()()()()()()() It feels so good to give this season a high grade again!!!! Woohoo!! Thank you for reading and to the fine folks at @watchingfairytales for putting this project together!

Next time...someone DIES!!!

...I’m saying that like we all don’t know who it is that dies… ...Please come back…I’m so lonely...

Season 2 Tally (124/220) Writer Tally for Season 2: Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis: (39/60) Jane Espenson (25/50) Andrew Chambliss and Ian Goldberg (24/50) David Goodman (16/30) Robert Hull (16/30) Christine Boylan (17/30) Kalinda Vazquez (20/30) Daniel Thomsen (10/20)

Operation Rewatch Archives

[winterbaby89]

Dark Hook Comes to Storybrooke - Chapter Twenty-Three

A Captain Swan, Season 1 Canon Divergence Collaboration by: @hollyethecurious, and @winterbaby89

Beta’d by: @ilovemesomekillianjones

Amazing Artwork by: @xhookswenchx (banner) and @flipperbrain (pastel below)

Rated M for language and dark themes (and maybe (probably) some sexy times… later ;o)

Summary: Moments before the Evil Queen’s Dark Curse whisks our beloved fairytale characters to Storybrooke, Captain Hook finally gets his revenge on the Crocodile. Twenty-eight years later, Killian Jones awakes in Storybrooke expecting just another ordinary day, that is until a number of abnormal occurrences disrupts his otherwise scheduled life. The greatest of which is a new face in town. A young woman by the name of Emma. Emma. What a lovely name…

Disclaimer: Canon dialogue and scenes from various episodes will appear within this fic. To Adam, Eddie, and the OUAT writers goes all the credit.

A/N: We’ve taken some creative license when it comes to how a certain dagger works in reference to exerting control over the Dark One. We realize that it is slightly different in canon, but felt it a necessary tweak for our story. Just go with us…

Line breaks indicate change in POV or Scene.

The gif set that launched a fic…

Also available on ao3, my fic page, and Hollye′s fic page And if you want to catch up on the last chapter.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Killian stood at the town line with Emma, David, Mary Margaret, and Henry, silently cursing to himself. It wasn’t as if he’d truly wanted to leave Storybrooke, but he’d hoped it would be an option should the Darkness prove too much for him to overcome. Now it would only serve as a last resort, seeing as the dwarves had discovered that once one crossed the town line they would revert back to their cursed self.

Terrible news, indeed.   

When Leroy and the others had run into town hall with their dire warning, it had taken some time to calm the masses once again. Graham returned with news that he’d been unable to locate Regina, speculating that she may be hiding out in her vault. Cooking up all manner of nightmarish hell for them, no doubt. They’d left the sheriff in charge, and had proceeded to the town line to assess what needed to be done to ensure no one crossed it unwittingly.

Killian smiled ruefully at their little party. Mary Margaret and David had insisted on accompanying Emma, and she in turn refused to let Henry out of her sight while Regina was in the wind. Henry and Emma had both insisted that he join them, so there they were. Five people doing a job that would otherwise only require two at most.

Emma extended a can of bright orange spray paint towards Killian. “We should mark the boundary,” she told him, as the prince and princess continued to discuss how best to announce this news to the town without starting a panic.

Killian nodded and took the can from her, shaking it as he walked over to the welcome sign. Another smile crept over his face as he saw the patch Marco had done all those months ago, after Emma had crashed into it. Before her, no one had ever come to Storybrooke, except Henry, so the fact that they had a sign in the first place seemed absurd now.

With the sign as his point of origin, Killian began to spray a visible line to designate the point of no return. Hunched over and thoroughly engrossed in his task, he was oblivious to the car coming straight for him until it was too late. Killian heard Emma cry out his name as he braced for the impact, but the one he felt did not come from the vehicle. A flash of light blinded him before he was propelled backward, landing hard on his back against the pavement.

Slowly, he sat up and took in several things all at once. The car that had been barreling toward him now rested against one of the forest’s trees, its front end smashed in from the impact. David and Mary Margaret stood paralyzed with stunned expressions on their face as they stared at Emma who was staring at her hands with the same expression.

“Are you okay, Killian?” Henry called out from David’s truck, where he’d been told to wait.

“Aye, lad,” he responded as he stood, not taking his eyes off Emma.

Emma’s eyes snapped up from her hands and met his with wide astonishment. “What the hell was that?”

“That, Swan,” he replied softly as he made his way to her, taking her hands in his once he got close enough, “was magic.”

“Magic?!” she exclaimed. “I have magic? Why? Wha-? How?”

Killian cupped the side of her face in an effort to calm her as he spoke, “Those are all good questions love, but I’m afraid they’ll have to wait. We’ve another, more urgent matter to attend to.”

Dropping his hand from her face, he looked back over his shoulder at the wrecked vehicle, then made eye contact with the prince. “Best call for an ambulance. Looks like the outside world just came to Storybrooke.”

Magic. I have magic. Magic that wrecked a car. I didn’t mean to wreck the car, I was trying to save Killian. Wait. No. I didn’t know I could save him, I just…

Emma hadn’t moved from where she’d stood when a blast of something indescribable had shot from her hands when she saw Killian about to be run down by the red convertible. She’d thrown her hands out with some kind of innate instinct, and the force of that action had launched Killian backward as a blast of white light struck the car and forced it into the tree line. An action that had stunned them all. Except for Killian. Somehow, he’d known.

“The ambulances are on their way, love,” Killian said, startling her from her thoughts.

Ambulances?

It took a minute for Emma to register the fact that there had to actually be people in the vehicle she’d sent careening into the tree.

“Oh, god. Are they… Did I-” Emma panicked.

“Emma, look at me,” Killian commanded, his hands resting atop each of her shoulders as he waited for her to meet his gaze. “They’re unconscious, but alive. The paramedics will be here soon. They’ll be okay.”

“You don’t know that!” she argued. She tried to pull away from him, but he kept a firm grip on her as he tried to calm her down. “Let go!”

An angry and pained expression crossed his face, and his hands seemed to involuntarily fall away. His jaw clenched, his hands balled at his sides, and it was then she realized what she’d done.

“Killian, I didn’t mean… I’m sorry, I wasn’t think-”

“It’s alright, Swan.”

“No. No it isn’t.” Emma now had her hands balled at her sides. The day’s events crashed over her in waves of frustration, and worry, and the last vestiges of her adrenaline were waning. “Very little about this day is okay, Killian. Henry was cursed and almost died! I had to slay a dragon! I just wrecked a car! I made you do something against your will. No wonder you didn’t want to be able to use magic. Look what I just did! I hurt people!”

“No, Emma.” The vehemence in Killian’s voice was palpable. “Your magic is nothing like mine. You saved Henry. You were trying to save me. You didn’t mean to harm anyone, and I know you didn’t mean to control me just now.” A smirk appeared at his lips as he cheekily added, “but, perhaps you could choose your words a bit more carefully? Given this world’s more colorful sayings, I could find myself doing all manner of unintended acts.”

Emma released an amused breath, and felt some of the tension within her drain away. The man always did know just what to say or do to ease her burdens, even temporarily.

Their attentions were pulled from one another at the sound of the ambulances making their way toward them. As Mary Margaret directed the paramedics to the convertible, David jogged over to them.

“I just spoke with Graham.” David stopped before them, his hands on his hips in an authoritative stance that Emma still couldn’t quite wrap her mind around. “He’s going to meet our new arrivals at the hospital. He’ll stay with them and keep us posted on their condition.”

“Any idea who they are?” Emma questioned.

“No. I didn’t want to check for ID and risk further injury by moving them.” Emma winced at the mention of their injuries, and David was quick to pick up on it. “Hey. Emma, this is not your fault. You didn’t know. None of us did. You didn’t mean for it to happen.”

“But it did happen,” Emma retorted. “How are we going to explain it?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean… what are we going to tell those two men when they regain consciousness? How are we going to explain the accident? What if they remember seeing this bright white light shooting out of some woman’s hands?”

“She’s got a point, David,” Killian stated. “What do we do if they remember seeing magic?”

“Well, let’s cross that bridge if we come to it,” David said. “We don’t know what they’ll remember, but just to be safe, let’s have Graham be the one to talk with them. Minimize the chance that seeing you triggers the memory.”

Emma nodded, her teeth worrying at her lip. She suddenly felt exhausted, and her shoulders slumped as she exhaled a heavy breath.

“Why don’t you go home,” David suggested, tentatively placing a hand on her shoulder. “Snow and I will head back to Town Hall and finish things up there. You and Henry should head home. You’ve both had a hell of a day.”

“We all have,” Emma grumbled. She’d love nothing more than to go back to her house, and pretend the day hadn’t happened, but she hated the idea that she was being sidelined.

“True,” David acknowledged, “but I’ve battled a dragon before, I know how taxing it can be.” His attempt at levity was almost as successful as Killian’s had been. “Go get some rest. We’ll all meet at Granny’s in the morning, and I’ll call you if anything urgent comes up before then.” David turned his attention to Killian and requested, “Look after them for me, Jones.”

Killian visibly startled at David’s words and subsequent clap to his shoulder, but managed to express an Aye, mate, before David headed back over to Mary Margaret and the two men being treated by paramedics.

“What say you, Swan?” Killian asked with raised brows, clearly deferring to her wishes over David’s.

Emma sighed and closed her eyes momentarily, her weariness weighing heavier upon her. Opening her eyes she met Killian’s expectant gaze. “Let’s go home, Captain.”

Killian sat in Emma’s living room watching the last embers from the fireplace slowly die. The house was quiet. Emma and Henry had retired some hours ago, and after the day they’d all had, a silent understanding that he would remain at the house passed between he and Swan when she’d turned in for the night.

It had been too early for bed when they’d first arrived back at the house. Not that any of them would have been able to sleep with the upheaval in their lives still so fresh. At first, none of them seemed to know what to do with themselves until Emma mentioned something about eating. Killian couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a bite, and he was certain the same could be said for Emma and Henry as well. He’d insisted on cooking, telling Emma to go sit with Henry by the fire and just enjoy having her boy back. In truth, Killian needed something to keep himself from being idle.

The Crocodile had been stalking him throughout the afternoon. After the loft, the demon had appeared again at Town Hall and briefly out at the town line, before Emma’s magic had been revealed. Killian had hoped that being at Emma’s home, the Saviour’s home would provide him a sanctuary from the manifestation of the Darkness, but the imp was there waiting for him.

It was easier to ignore him if Killian stayed busy, so he’d thrown himself into the task of preparing their evening meal after he’d gotten a fire started in Emma’s living room. As he chopped, stirred, and sampled the provisions, he found himself watching Emma and Henry fondly as they looked through Henry’s storybook. Emma had confessed that she’d never really read much of it before, only looking at the odd pages Henry pointed out over the past few months as it related to the fairy tale character she was assisting at the time.

They’d only just settled before the fire to read over her parent’s story when Henry called out excitedly for Killian to come have a look. He’d been astonished to see all the pages that had once been removed, including his own, had now been restored to their rightful place within the book.

“It must be because there’s magic here now,” Henry had deduced. A deduction Killian felt sure must be correct, as he recognized the vibrations of magic within the book’s pages.

Had it not been for Henry’s never ending exuberance, dinner would most likely have been a quiet affair. As it was, Emma kept encouraging Henry to just eat so they could go to bed, the weariness of the day was etched on her brow and set in her slumped posture. Killian was glad for the lad’s constant chatter, though. Focusing on the boy allowed him to turn a deaf ear to the Darkness, which seemed to have as much to say about the day’s events as Henry did.

Now alone in the quiet house with little to occupy his thoughts, and sleep no longer a means of escape, Killian could no longer ignore the murmurings. Nor could he ignore the quiet whisper singing to him from upstairs. The dagger was calling to him, and the Darkness was urging him to go take it back.

“No,” Killian grit out through clenched teeth as he willed himself to remain on the sofa.

But without the dagger, how will you protect Emma from those two men? Surely they saw her use magic. What will happen to her, to the town, once that secret is exposed?

“We don’t know that they saw anything,” Killian countered aloud to the darkness of the room. “And even if they did, I won’t hurt the innocent. We’ll find another way.”

Can’t hurt the innocent, you mean, his mind hissed. No matter. You don’t need the dagger to stop the other threat in town… Regina, it drawled. The Evil Queen. This is all her fault, anyway. She released the magic. She wants to set the whole town against you, set Emma and Henry against you. Why… if she’d been honest about what would happen when you used the dagger for your revenge, you wouldn’t have become the Dark One in the first place. She’s no innocent. The Saviour’s command does not apply to her. You should go find her. Track her down and make her pay for what she’s done to you. Stop her before she has a chance to use her magic to hurt those you love. You won’t need magic to end her. You’ve killed dozens without it. What’s one more?

“Enough!” Killian spat. His heart pounded in his chest and a cold sweat came over him as he realized he’d moved from the sofa to the door. The knob held firmly in his hand, the intent to turn it and walk out into the night still rooted in his subconscious.

“Killian?”

Emma tossed and punched at her pillow. For the eightieth time. Despite how exhausted she felt, how fried her mind and nerves were, she couldn’t bring herself to actually fall asleep. Not with the Dark One downstairs.

Emma hadn’t truly understood what it meant. Being the Dark One. When Regina had mentioned it earlier in the storage room, the title had held no meaning to her. She knew, based on David’s reaction and Killian’s behavior in the loft that it couldn’t be anything good, but she trusted Killian. He was a good man, and clearly the fact that he was the Dark One hadn’t put Henry off of befriending or trusting him all this time.

She’d seen the fear in Killian’s eyes, the earnest pleading for her to help him try and control whatever sinister affect this Darkness was having on him. With just the quick rant about never being his own master, Emma knew what it had cost him to ask her to take the dagger. Using the favor he held over her was telltale in just how important her compliance was to him.

She knew he was Captain Hook. That realization hit her in the hallway of the hospital as Henry lay cursed, and really settled into her in the Town Hall when she saw the reaction of the town’s people when Belle had outed him. When she’d heard what he’d done to her, that he’d almost killed her and had murdered Rumplestiltskin, she’d had a moment’s difficulty reconciling the villain with the man she knew.

Then he’d reunited Jefferson with his daughter, and that good man was evident right there in front of her once more. He might have been Captain Hook, but Killian Jones was a good man. Except, he wasn’t just Killian Jones now. He was also the Dark One.

After she and Henry turned in for the night, Emma spent hours reading through the storybook. She found it served as a suitable distraction to the things her mind wasn’t ready to address or process just yet. Henry had taken her through her parent’s story, her story, but with the long night before her, there were other stories she was interested in.

The story of Killian Jones. Captain Hook and his Crocodile. Rumplestiltskin. The Dark One.

She’d poured over the pages. Stories of cowardice and betrayal were juxtaposed against loyalty and good form. Heartbreak that fueled villainy as they both quested to right a wrong, by whatever means necessary. Means, Emma knew, the stories only scratched the surface of; a chilling darkness running much deeper in acts too grievous to display upon the page. Acts that had spanned centuries.

David had been right to be wary, Captain Hook was not to be trusted. Neither was the Dark One.

Killian Jones, however… he was another matter altogether.

The sound of voices from downstairs pulled Emma from her thoughts. Had Henry gotten up and gone downstairs, waking Killian up in the process? Emma crawled out of bed with the intentions of getting Henry back into his, but when she passed by her son’s room he was in bed fast asleep. Then who is Killian talking to?

“Killian?” she called out as she made her way down the stairs, finding him stopped in the middle of the living room. “I thought I heard voices. Who were you talking to?”

“Just talking to myself,” he replied, clearly on edge about something. “Old habit from many nights on the lonely seas.”

“Hmm,” Emma hummed. It wasn’t an all out lie, but his words didn’t ring true either. “What are you doing up so late?”

“I could ask the same thing of you, love,” Killian deflected.

“I asked you first.” Really, Emma? What is this, third grade?

Killian made his way to the sofa and sank down into the cushions with a heavy sigh. “The Darkness does not require sleep, so as the Dark One, it seems neither do I.” He played with his rings as he spoke, but stopped when he turned his attention to her. “Your turn, Swan. What’s keeping you up at this hour?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Emma scoffed sarcastically. “Maybe the fact that my parents are Snow White and Prince Charming, and my son was raised by the Evil Queen. Or the fact that I helped Cinderella keep her baby, and her best friend is both Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf.” She was pacing now, the reality she’d suppressed all night now flowing out of her like a tidal wave. “Not to mention that the person I am closest to in this entire town, or the whole world for that matter, is Captain freaking Hook, whom I saved from getting hit by a car. With. Magic.” Killian stared at her from over the back of the sofa, and Emma suddenly felt self-conscious about her rant. Moving to sit with him, she added, “I may have been reading Henry’s book.”

Killian’s slightly stunned expression became one of panic before it slowly transformed into something softer, with a wisp of smugness as he recounted, “Closer to than anyone else in the world?”

“Of course that’s what you would get out of all that.” Emma rolled her eyes as he chuckled, and for a moment everything felt so… normal. It felt like them. Emma and Killian, not the Saviour and Captain Hook. It could have been any other night, with easy banter and over-the-top flirty overtures. Any other night when Emma might get lost in Killian’s forget-me-not eyes and wonder if things would ever move past the stage of longing.

Emma felt a blush creep across her face as she remembered her efforts to try and push them past that stage. Had it really only been last night when she’d drunkenly tried to pull him into her bed? “Killian, about last night.”

“Swan, you don’t have to-”

“No. I want to thank you.” She cut him off and took his hand in hers, causing that stunned look to settle on his face again. “I want you to know that I appreciate you being honest with me. Wanting to wait until I really knew. And now that I do… now that I know you’re actually Captain Hook, and the…”

“The Dark One,” he supplied despondently, his eyes cast down with a hint of resignation.

“I want you to know that it doesn’t change the way I feel about the Killian Jones I’ve come to know.”

Killian’s eyes snapped up to meet hers, wide with a small spark of hope as he tentatively pressed, “But?”

“But,” she continued, intertwining her fingers with his in an effort to stoke that hope. “I’m going to need some time to process all this. I mean, my parents are Snow White and Prince Charming, and I have magic, and you are actually Captain Hook.”

“Without the perm and waxed mustache,” Killian teased, a smile pulling at his lips.

“Or the hook.”

“The one benefit of the curse, love,” Killian responded, both of them now smiling fondly at the memory of having the same conversation all those weeks ago.

“Just… be patient?” Emma asked.

“I seem to remember you saying that to me once before, too,” Killian reminded.

Emma shuddered slightly at the memory of her being suspended in the mine shaft, attempting to rescue Henry and the dashing rapscallion before her. “Yeah. Just before you nearly plummeted to your death.”

“Well, the one upside to being the Dark One is that I’m immortal now, so I quite literally have all the time in the world. Even if another car appears out of nowhere and tries to kill me.” He stared at her pointedly with raised brows, and Emma’s nerves spiked at the reminder of the car, and the two men, and the fact that she had magic.

“Hey,” Killian soothed, rubbing small circles over her wrist, perceptive as ever. “Everything’s going to be okay. No use worrying yourself until we know more about what those men remember, and we won’t know that until we meet everyone in the morning.”

Emma took a deep breath and nodded, offering him a small smile before she stood to head back upstairs. “You going to be okay?”

“Aye, love. You don’t need to worry about me.” Emma’s superpower wasn’t too sure about that statement. “Go get some rest, Swan. I’ve a feeling you’ll be needing it. Just know that whatever tomorrow throws at us, we’ll face it together.”

That statement, however… nothing had ever rang more true.

“Captain! Captain!”

Killian turned to see Smee crossing the street, approaching them just as they’d made their way to Granny’s the next morning. He told Emma and Henry to go on ahead and that he’d meet them inside shortly, then greeted his first mate.

“Ah, Mr. Smee. It’s good to see that you’re your old self again.”

“You too, Sir. I’ve been looking for you since the curse broke. Where have you been?”

“I’ve had things to attend to, Mr. Smee,” Killian replied sharply, not caring for his first mate’s impertinence.

“Of course, Sir,” Smee said apologetically. “I was just wondering if I ought to be rounding up the crew. If you planned for us to set sail soon.”

“Not quite, Mr. Smee. It seems there is no safe passage out of Storybrooke.”

“What do you mean?”

“Anyone who crosses over the town line reverts back to their cursed self. I’m not willing to test whether or not the same holds true if we stray too far out to sea, are you Mr. Smee?”

“Oh. Well… no, of course not.” Smee’s face fell at the news. “So what do we do now?

“Now,” Killian replied. “We bide our time and wait. I’ve business to attend to this morning and have no plans to open the shop today. Carry on as you wish, but stay at the ready. I may have need of you.”

“Aye, Captain.” With his orders received Killian made his way into the diner as Smee set off to do… whatever it was Smee did in his free time.

Settled in one of the booths next to Emma, Killian listened to the various reports of the happenings from the previous evening and overnight. The prince and princess relayed all that had happened when they’d returned to Town Hall, including the reunion of David’s wife Katherine, really Princess Abigail, with her love Frederick. It had been decided that the fairies would oversee the continued task of helping people reunite with their loved ones, while also compiling a list of cursed personas to real identities. Killian couldn’t be sure, but he thought he saw an astonishingly rare expression of happiness and possibly a slight blush on Leroy’s face at the mention of one of the fairies.

The expression lasted only a moment though, as he was then tasked to give an account of the dwarves’ overnight stake-out on the Queen’s home. There had still been no sign of Regina, her house remained dark and quiet all throughout the night, leading all those present to believe she must be holed up in her vault. Emma and Graham agreed to go and check it out after they adjourned, which left Graham to give his report on the two men from the town line.

“How are they?” Emma inquired, wringing her hands beneath the table, which Killian stilled as he took one of them in his.

“Whale says they’ll be fine. They’re both conscious, but are being held for observation just to be on the safe side.”

“Who are they?” Mary Margaret pressed. “What did they say when you questioned them about the accident?”

It felt as though their entire assembly held their breath as they awaited the sheriff’s answer.

“They’re brothers by the names of John and Michael Banks. They were just on a drive up the coast and got distracted referencing their map when they saw the sign for Storybrooke. They said the last thing they remembered was double checking the route on their GPS then waking up at the hospital.”

“So they didn’t see the magic?” David clarified.

“No,” Graham assured them. “In fact they were worried I was going to cite them for driving while distracted.”

Killian let out a sigh of relief. “So how long are we going to have to endure their presence in town?”

“Whale said barring any complications, they’ll be released tomorrow morning.”

“And Tillman thinks it’ll take three or four days to get their car running well enough to leave town,” Ruby chimed in as she sidled up next to Graham.

“Tell him the sooner the better.” Killian squeezed Emma’s hand as he spoke, and she responded with a grateful smile that had his heart fluttering.

“Right,” David announced as he stood. “I think it’s time we all get to work, then. Snow and I will check in with Blue at Town Hall. Emma, Killian, and Graham will be on Regina patrol.”

The prince and princess took their leave, with Leroy hot on their heels expressing his desire to assist the fairies.

“Does that mean I get to come with you guys?” Henry asked excitedly as Killian and Emma made their way out of the booth.

“Sorry, kid,” Emma responded, dropping Killian’s hand as she pulled her coat back on. “But you’re staying with Ruby. She’s gonna watch after you while we look for Regina.”

“Actually,” Ruby hedged apologetically, “there’s something I need to take care of this morning.” She and Graham shared a significant look before she turned and inquired, “Killian, you haven’t, by chance, seen a red cloak at the pawn shop, have you?”

“Not that I recall. Why?”

Graham wrapped an arm around Ruby’s shoulder and gave her an encouraging nod, prompting her to continue. “The full moon is in a couple of days, and with magic being back there’s a chance that I’ll… you know.” Killian could see the fear in Ruby’s eyes. Compassion sparked within him, but the Darkness was quick to try and snuff it out. Greedy for a desperate soul to entice and entrap. “In our realm, the cloak kept me from transforming. I have no memory of ever seeing it in town, and if I can’t find it before the full moon I’ll need a place where I can transform without hurting anyone. Graham’s offered to let me make… modifications to a room in his cabin. I need to get started so everything will be ready in time. Just in case.”

Killian could see the Crocodile’s gleeful expression out of the corner of his eye and had to fight back the instinct, both as the Dark One and a pirate, to work Ruby’s anxiety to his advantage. There was a wardrobe of cloaks in the back room of the shop. Believing they’d be of no use or interest to anyone in town while under the curse, he hadn’t bothered to really look them over. If Ruby’s cloak was among them, what would she be willing to offer to get it back? What might he wish to extract from her in exchange?

Killian clenched his jaw and shook the thought from his head, throwing a glare at the Crocodile as a growl rumbled low in his chest.

“Killian?” Emma said softly, her hand coming to rest on his forearm. “What is it?”

Killian snapped back and hurriedly assured, “Nothing. Everything’s fine.” The confused and wary expressions staring back at him attested to their disbelief, and Killian let go a long suffering sigh before confessing, “The cloak may be at the shop. There’s a wardrobe in the back room containing garments, but I haven’t taken a good enough look before to assess what all it contains. I can go by there later and check, and if it is there… you are welcome to it.” He had to force out the last part of his statement, an itching desire crawled under his skin that not even Emma’s touch could alleviate, and flared at Graham’s question.

“What’s your price?”

Killian swallowed and steadied himself. “I’m no longer in the business of making deals. I won’t give in so easily.” Killian couldn’t help but direct that comment to the figment seated at the bar, even if it caused the others to cast glances that way as well. “Go and make whatever provisions you feel might be necessary, just in case the cloak isn’t there.”

“What about Henry?” Emma reminded.

“I’ll stay here with the lad,” Killian offered. “Might be best if I stay back anyway. Her Majesty has a way of bringing out the worst in me, and right now,” Killian faced them all with a self-deprecating smile and an attempt of levity rolling off his tongue, “I think we can all agree that’s something we ought to avoid.”

They stood assessing him for a moment. Ruby was the first to respond, surprising them all as she wrapped her arms around to hug him.

“Thank you,” she murmured. “I knew you were still the same old Jones.”

Killian balked at her words, his eyes met Graham’s whose reflected Ruby’s sentiment in the way he now took in the pirate before him. Ruby kissed Graham goodbye, ruffled Henry’s hair, and called out a farewell to them all before heading out of the diner, but not before reminding Killian to let her know what he discovered about her cloak.

Killian felt Emma take his hand, her eyes searching his as she asked, “Are you sure you and Henry are going to be okay here?”

“Aye, love,” Killian assured. “The diner’s the safest place we could be right now. I doubt Regina would come after Henry in such a public place. Besides, I’d like to see her get past Granny’s crossbow,” he added cheekily, throwing a smirk at Granny who was stowing said weapon behind the counter. “Besides, I wouldn’t feel comfortable taking him out in town, let alone to the pawn shop just yet. There’s no telling how the newly released magic is affecting some of the items. Best for him to wait until we can have the fairies give it the all clear.”

“Okay, then,” Emma relented. “We’ll see you at the sheriff station later with David and Mary Margaret. Just… be careful. Regina is still out there somewhere.”

“I promise you, Swan. No harm will come to your boy whilst he’s in my charge,” Killian vowed earnestly, and he noticed some of the tension she’d been carrying leave her shoulders as she squeezed his hand one last time before turning her attention to Henry.

“Alright, kid. Be good for Killian, and I’ll see you later.” Emma wrapped her arms around her son as he said see you later, then watched him scramble onto the barstool Granny had just set a cup of hot cocoa down at. “Ready to go?” Emma turned to Graham, but a look of hesitation sat heavily upon the man’s face.

“Actually, before we head out… Jones, can I talk to you for a second?” Graham gestured them toward the back hallway and the three made their way out of earshot of the diner’s patrons.

“What’s up, mate?”

“I was wondering,” Graham began nervously, “since there’s magic here now, if you would put this back where it’s supposed to be.”

Killian drew in a sharp breath as Graham pulled his heart from the inside pocket of his jacket, and heard Emma gasp next to him causing him to meet her wide eyes.

Killian swallowed and remorsefully replied, “I would if I could mate, but I-I’m afraid I can’t.”

“You’re the Dark One, don’t you have magic?”

“Aye, but it’s complicated.” Graham had seen the dagger the day before, had heard Belle say that it was the only weapon that could kill the Dark One, but Killian wasn’t sure how much the man might know about its controlling affects, and as much as he may have come to trust the sheriff, Killian wasn’t ready for that secret to be shared by too many people within town. Besides, he didn’t need Killian’s magic. “Not to worry though. I might not be able to put your heart back, but Emma can.”

“Emma can what now?!” his Swan hissed next to him.

“You have magic Swan, you can do this.”

“Killian!” She stared at him incredulously. “That’s Graham’s heart.”

“Aye.”

“That Regina ripped out of his chest.”

“Aye.”

“And you expect me to put it back?”

“Aye.”

“Stop saying that!”

Killian winced at the unintended command, and Emma’s eyes screwed shut, “Damn it! Killian, I’m sorry. Say… say whatever you want,” she affirmed apologetically.

“Wait. Sorry for what?” Graham asked. “Why can’t you-”

“Do you want that heart back in your chest or not?” Killian interjected curtly.

“Aye,” Graham replied, earning him glares from Killian and Emma both. “Sorry,” he muttered before handing his heart to Emma.

Emma stared down at the heart in her hand, shaking her head as her voice nearly betrayed her in its denial. “I-I can’t do this.”

“Yes, Swan. You can.”

Killian glanced past Graham and saw the Crocodile looking on. Emma may have commanded him to not use magic, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t share the inherent knowledge he now possessed in how to wield it. Something in the demon’s eyes gave him a moment’s pause, but Killian brushed it aside. He wasn’t asking Emma to do anything dark with her magic, and despite her doubts, he knew that she would want to do whatever she could to help Graham.

“How?”

“Will it,” Killian instructed. “Magic isn’t an intellectual endeavor. It’s emotion. Look inward and ask yourself, why am I doing this? Who am I helping? Just… feel it, Swan.”

Emma closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened them, Killian saw a flash of resolve in her eyes just before a quick burst of magic allowed her to place Graham’s heart back into his chest. The sheriff gasped at the sensation, eyes blinking wildly before they fixed themselves on Emma’s astonished face.

“I did it,” Emma stated, her stunned tone matching her expression.

“You did it,” Graham astonished back.

“I knew you could do it, Swan,” Killian affirmed. A sense of pride welled in his chest at her accomplishment, and perhaps at the part he’d played in it. A part that was met with the greatest reward he could have imagined when Emma threw her arms around him and whispered an earnest thank you into his ear.

Chapter Twenty-Four 

Tagging some lovelies that have asked to be tagged, as well as some we believe might enjoy. Please let us know if you do, or don’t wish to be tagged.

@abeylin1982 @best-left-hook-jones @eala-captian @aprilqueen84 @artistic-writer @branlovesouat @captain-k-jones @captain-swan-coffee @cocohook38 @downeystarkjr @flipperbrain @florenzu @freakassbuthunter @gingerchangeling @goldengirlschildhood @golfgirld @greenleaf777  @ilovemesomekillianjones @in-spirational @jennjenn615 @joneskillian @jsilva0117 @juliakaze @kmomof4 @kymbersmith-90 @laschatzi @leiaswanjoneskid @lifeismadeup-ofmoments @like-waves-on-the-beach @linda8084 @mariakov81 @natascha-remi-ronin @onceuponaprincessworld @resident-of-storybrooke @rookiehookie @seriouslyhooked @smutqueen27 @snidgetintheapple @supergirl42universe @teamhook @therooksshiningknight @tiganasummertree @ultraluckycatnd @whimsicallyenchantedrose @wordsmith-storyweaver @xhookswenchx @yayimallamaagain

[daeneryssansa]

GTKY Once edition

I was tagged by @theonceoverthinker! under the cut since it’s loooong

Musical episode: Yay or nay? Yay. I don’t necessary like the plotline in the episode - it felt a bit rushed to me, which they had to do in order to fit all the music in the one-hour episode. I enjoyed the episode overall and loved the songs - I eternally have “Revenge is Gonna Be Mine” stuck in my head, and I love Emma’s moment so much. And you can tell the cast had so much fun doing it. For a lot of shows, musical episodes don’t make sense, but it fit perfectly here.

When did you start watching Once, and do you remember why? Actually a pretty good story! I started in October 2011, the first episode I watched in full being Snow Falls. I was having a rough week. We had been hit by a monster blizzard out of nowhere, and had spent almost the entire previous week without power. To top it all off, my high school boyfriend had a generator at his house (while my family & I sat in the cold and dark) and didn’t invite me over once that week. I broke up with him (that being the culmination of a lot of problems with him), but since it was my first real “relationship”, I was pretty upset, and my parents were out to dinner, which left me home alone and desperate for something to do. I turned on the TV and saw that Once was on, and remembered thinking it looked interesting. I was immediately hooked, and it turned my whole week around. What made watching Once worthwhile? I think this show has something for everyone to relate to, whether it’s a specific character, a relationship, a particular arc, or just the whole concept of hope, love, and family. It’s also a way for us to watch some of our favorite childhood characters in a whole new light, coping with (some) issues that we ourselves might deal with. I also watched it with my mom, which made it a great bonding experience for us once I introduced it to her right before the Season 2 premiere. First + Current Main Ships? Snowing was my first OTP! I was a bit biased having seen Snow Falls before any other episode, and I think that’s their best episode as a couple. As for current ships, I ship pretty much everyone with everyone! There are so many great dynamics to enjoy, but if I had to pick a current top 3, I would probably go with Captain Swan, Swan Queen, and Rumbelle. First + Current Favorite character? My first favorite character is a tough one, since it’s been almost seven years since I first started watching the show. I want to say it was probably Belle - I adored her from the second she appeared on my TV screen. She’s still my favorite character, joined by Killian & Regina. Favorite arc (Why?)? I love the original arc most (Season 1), but I feel like most people do, so I’ll say Season 3B (the Wicked Witch). It had a lot of the same story elements of Season 1 without being a complete plagiarism of it, and there were a lot of great dynamics that were explored. I also think Bex made a wonderful villain! Favorite plot twist? In Season 3B, I loved Regina being the one to break the curse! Everyone spent the entire arc trying to find a way for Emma to break it, and it seemed like it would be a Swan Believer TLK, but instead, we got all the Regal Believer feels. And this time, Regina got to be the savior by defeating her sister with light magic. It was a great way for her character to come full circle. Speaking of 3B twists, an honorable mention to Snow White casting the Dark Curse by crushing Charming’s heart. Can’t elaborate or I will start crying. Hardest death to watch? I have to agree with Jenna on this one - although Killian’s deaths never really stick, his are the hardest for me to watch because (for those of you who have followed previous rewatch posts of mine) Colin’s mannerisms remind me so much of my boyfriend (not the boyfriend with the generator!!! a several years later and several years wiser boyfriend). So it’s really difficult to watch Emma’s reaction after he sacrifices himself at the end of 5A - Jen’s acting is incredible. And the elevator scene at the end of 5B always gets me too. This character should have gotten more time? *grabs megaphone* RUBY LUCAS! How do you summarize the show to your friends? (max. 3 sentences) Basically it’s a bunch of fairytale characters in the real world. They’re always cursed. They’re all related. Favorite Once specific trope (think Memory Wipe, Family Trees, Glowing Walkey-Talkey Hearts, Head Achey Timelines…) I don’t know if this counts but the theme of finding each other is really special in my opinion. It goes so far past Snow & Charming finding one another. Pretty much every character gets to experience finding someone they love.

Three quotes that mean a lot to you? “I am not nothing! I was never nothing! The power that you have, I don’t need.” “You are not all evil, and I am not all good. Things are not that simple.” “You don’t get to decide what I do or how I feel. I do.” If you could take home any prop from the set, what would it be? Either Henry’s book or Snowing’s ring! Favourite funny scene? One that comes to mind (that I recently watched) is when Charming is helping Rumple look for Belle in Storybrooke after she runs away, and Rumple has to awkwardly ask Charming for dating advice. And then it comes back later in Lacey when Rumple has to get Charming’s help to ask her out. Favorite Platonic Ship: Either Charming & Red or Belle & Red (definitely wish Red Beauty was not platonic even though I love Rumbelle) Favorite dish from Granny’s? I would have to say Granny’s burger! Belle highly recommends.

What part of the newly merged realms would you like to live in? Probably regular Storybrooke, within walking distance from Granny’s. 

[bizarre-dollhouse]

My Top 10 Favourite Anime (And Why You Should Watch Them)

This is normally something I would put on my main blog, but I wanted to celebrate a follower milestone and also I know this will reach a significantly wider audience on this blog.

Consider this both a list of recommendations and a *get to know me* thing, I guess.

Honourable Mentions:

Bakemonogatari: A really stylized show about a semi vampire helping people with their supernatural afflictions born from emotional issues. The subsequent seasons get a little questionable, but this is definitely a standalone story with great dialogue and visuals. (15 eps)

Shiki: Creepy story about a small town infested with vampires. Really brutal and sick, but it has fascinating themes. The pacing is a bit slow and it has a kind of bad scene towards the end, but the show is 100% worth it. (24 eps)

Cardcaptor Sakura: Because this is mostly aimed at younger viewers, I would only really recommend this show for either magical girl fans, or people who watched the extremely altered dub as a kid. That being said, its a cute, fun show about magic with a likeable cast and surprisingly creative and original ideas, especially towards the latter half. (70 eps)

Jojos Bizarre Adventure 4: Diamond is Unbreakable: Full disclosure, I have not seen the first 3 jojo series, but its not necessary to enjoy this show. This is a super creative and really fun series about superpowered badasses in a strange city fighting each other and trying to solve a murder mystery in the background. Weird, but in the best way. (39 eps)

Kuroshitsuji: Book of Circus: This should be higher on the list, but in truth I would recommend the manga way over the show. But, if you want to watch a supernatural horror/comedy without reading a 138+ chapter manga, OR you were a fan of the original Black Butler seasons and want to see something way better, give this a watch. (10 eps)

*drumroll*

10. Trigun

So Trigun takes place is this old west, yet mysterious science fiction-y world where, through a bunch of complicated scenarios, a pacifist is the most wanted criminal known to man. Due to his status as a “natural disaster,” two insurance workers are tasked with reining him in to save their business. It’s an incredibly charming series, and the protagonist is really likeable. It’s extremely creative, funny, and emotional near the end. I do have some problems with the ending because it almost seems like the final conflict just...solves itself, but that’s a nitpick. The first episode is basically a short film, so give that a watch and see how you feel. (26 eps)

9. Paranoia Agent

This was directed by the late and great Satoshi Kon and has his usual themes about the blurring between fiction, dreams, and reality. It’s about a string of mysterious assaults committed by a kid with a baseball bat, and how these assaults seem to solve the problems of the victims. It’s very arthouse and has a twist that makes me ball my eyes out even though it’s not sad it’s just...odd and overwhelming. It drags a bit near the middle, but if you like kind of surreal stuff that’s also just really good, you have to watch this show. (13 eps)

8. Baby Steps

The amazing thing about this show is that its premise is specifically designed to make me hate it. It’s about a nerdy teenager who starts to play a sport for the sole sake of getting fit and having a more well rounded life style, and also he has a crush on this really popular girl. That sounds fucking awful, but the main character is actually really likeable (he reminds me a lot of Deku from BNHA) and I swear to fucking god every time I thought this show was going to do something awful and cliched with its romantic comedy plot, it doesn’t. The beauty and the geek trope is still there, but all of the bullshit that comes with it is omitted in a way I feel was kind of self-aware. The sports aspect is really good too: it’s well paced and there’s lots of tension even though the show as a whole is really upbeat and pleasant. I had a blast watching it, and if you can make it past the fact that is has god awful animation, give it a watch.

7. Higurashi: When They Cry

Yet another great show with absolute garbage animation. Anyways, this show is about a group of teenagers in a small town who are unknowingly trapped in a time loop. In each loop there’s a bunch of new mysteries, as well as some extremely brutal murders and tortures experienced my the main cast. I’ve seen a number of Western shows (Orphan Black, BBC Sherlock, Lost, Supernatural, etc.) fall apart because the writers want a really clever and intricate mystery to play out, but they don’t want to actually put the time into crafting one, so it’s just a bunch of cliffhangers with no answers or pay off. THIS SHOW SUCCEEDS AT WHAT ALL OF THOSE OTHER SHOWS FAIL AT. While not all of the answers are great (the second season isn’t as good) the original author somehow made the world’s most ludicrously complicated mystery story work, with a lot of it relying on the audience to put all of the pieces together even when the characters can’t. Its very clever in doing that: it makes its audience feel smart. It also has themes that don’t really show up in other horror stories, even though they’re incredibly relevant to fear and violence. Great show, go watch it. (50 eps)

6. Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood

Everyone knows about this show, everyone says it’s great, and everyone’s right. If you’ve been living under a rock for ten years: the show is about two brothers who break an alchemy taboo, which destroys their bodies, They’re on the hunt for something to restore them to normal and along the way they meet like 8990354578579 characters with interesting stories. It’s tightly written and really gripping. It’s fun, but also really dramatic and emotional when it needs to be. My only problems with it are that the ending is reaaaallllly convoluted, and there’s a minor plot point earlier on that gets weirdly dropped, but everyone kinda forgets about those things because the show’s so good. Also the brotherly bond makes me cry. (64 eps)

5. FLCL

I honestly don’t even know where to start with this show because it has the unique property of being the only show I have ever seen that I have literally no problems with. Not even nitpicks. There is nothing wrong with this show; it’s perfect. The only reason it’s not number 1 is because some other shows have more ideas or more fleshed out characters. So this arthouse spastic comedy is about a boy who is disappointed with all of the adults in his life, then some chick hits him in the face with a guitar and giant robots from a secret facility start coming out of his head. It’s fucking wild and has like 30 different aesthetics and I love all of them. It’s the best looking show I’ve ever seen and one of the best directed. It feels like someone read a really weird poem and turned it into a 6 episode show. It’s funny, it’s emotional, it’s cartoony, it’s beautiful, it’s raunchy, it’s poetic, it’s silly, it’s creative, and it’s got strong themes. The wtf visuals, the nonsensical plot, and the amazing soundtrack make an aesthetic experience more than anything. (6 eps)

4. Princess Tutu

I already made a post about this show and why it’s good, which you can check out here, but the gist is it’s a meta fairytale about a duck that turns into a girl to help a storybook prince find his emotions. I used to love stories that were “twists on fairytales” or whatever, but after watching this show I realized that the genre is pretty derivative. This show is so amazing it honestly made me reevaluate an entire genre and come to the conclusion that this is the only member of that genre worth watching. It’s truly creative and well crafted with fantastic characters. (26 eps)

3. Hunter x Hunter (2011)

This show is basically a bunch of creative ideas, unique set pieces, and interesting characters stacked on top of each other in a trench coat disguised as a narrative. It’s about a perky shonen protagonist and a child assassin becoming friends while also trying to become hunters (a position involving vast wealth and adventure). It’s in a modern fantasy setting so literally anything can happen. In one arc they have to play life-or-death dodgeball against robots, and another is an insanely epic tale about the intense evil that people are capable of (feat. a 25 episode climax). I can’t even talk about all of the themes or ideas because there are just too many. Because of it’s wild, sprawling story, it has a lot of ass pulls and retcons, but in the grand scheme of things they don’t really matter. It’s long, but super easy to watch in huge chunks. (148 eps)

2. Neon Genesis Evangelion and The End of Evangelion

The most efficient way to describe this show is to say that it’s the most interesting show ever made. It’s about an apocalyptic future in which emotionally disturbed teenagers must pilot giant bio-machines to fight monsters which are referred to as angels. It’s got deep characters, a creative story, and is probably the most well directed show I’ve ever seen. The ending infamously fell apart due to production problems, so there’s a movie called The End of Evangelion to conclude the story. It’s a very disturbing arthouse movie, so watch out for that, but the show as a whole is moooosssstly more straightforward and fascinating, This is an absolute must watch. (26 eps and 1 movie)

1. Baccano!

Baccano! takes place in 1930s New York, and is about thieves, gangsters, criminals, terrorists, alchemists, and immortals interacting in this nonlinear comedy/action thrill ride. I felt like I was on a rollercoaster while watching this show. It’s the perfect blend of action, comedy, romance, drama, horror, and creative storytelling. It’s fantastic to rewatch since the first episodes barely make any sense without context (but are still an absolute joy to watch). It’s got great characters and it’s a great story. Go watch it. And then watch it again. (13 eps and 3 OVAs)

That’s it for this list! Check out my MAL page for more recommendations if you’re interested and have a great night! 

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020: 03/01

Last week, there were 10 songs on the UK Top 40 chart that were not holiday or Christmas singles, and this week, there are two, and by two, I mean these are really technicalities, since depending on however you define a Christmas song, there could also be no Christmas songs whatsoever on this chart. The week after the Christmas songs on all charts, especially the UK Singles Chart and Billboard Hot 100 (Where “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey dropped out entirely from #1), are chaotic, so much so that I think once again I’ll have to eschew tradition and change the format up a bit, because I’m not starting with the top 10; rather I’m starting with the drop-outs, which as you can expect will be mostly Christmas songs. So, with no further ado... 

Holiday Dropouts

Okay, so first of all, “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey is out from #2, “Last Christmas” by WHAM! is out from #3, “Fairytale of New York” by the Pogues featuring Kirsty MacColl is out from #4, “Merry Christmas Everyone” by Shakin’ Stevens is out from #6, “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” by Band Aid is out from #7, “Step into Christmas” by Elton John is out from #8, “Happy Christmas (War is Over)” by John Legend is out from #9, “I Wish it Could be Christmas Everyday” by Wizzard is out from #10, “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” by Michael Bublé is out from #11, “Santa Tell Me” by Ariana Grande is out from #13, “One More Sleep” by Leona Lewis is out from #15, “Santa’s Coming for Us” by Sia is out from #17, “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” by Brenda Lee is out from #18, “Merry Xmas Everybody” by Slade is out from #19, “Underneath the Tree” by Kelly Clarkson is out from #21, “Cozy Little Christmas” by Katy Perry is out from #22, “Driving Home for Christmas” by Chris Rea is out from #24, “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Andy Williams is out from #25, “Mistletoe” by Justin Bieber is out from #27, “Happy Xmas (War is Over)” by John Lennon and Yoko Ono with the Plastic Ono Band featuring the Harlem Boys Choir or something to that effect is out from #28, “Christmas Lights” by Coldplay is out from #29, “Jingle Bell Rock” by Bobby Helms is out from #30, “White Christmas” by Bing Crosby is out from #31, “Holly Jolly Christmas” by Michael Bublé is out from #32, “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” by Darlene Home is out from #33, “Sleigh Ride” by the Ronettes is out from #34, “Stay Another Day” by East 17 is out from #35, “Wonderful Christmastime” by Paul McCartney is out from #37 and “Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!” by Dean Martin is out from #39. Obviously, all of the Christmas songs from outside of the top 40 are gone too, with one exception. That won’t be the last Christmas song I mention this episode but I’m glad to finally be done with these. Here’s the top 10.

Top 10

Obviously, the highest-charting song from last week excluding any Christmas songs, and the only non-holiday song in the top 10 last week, is up four spaces to #1, and hence technically the first #1 hit of 2020. It’s “Own It” by Stormzy featuring Ed Sheeran and Burna Boy, becoming Stormzy’s third #1, Sheeran’s ninth and obviously Burna Boy’s first. Congratulations, guys, it was inevitable.

Now eight of the ten songs that survived last week are all in the top 10, with the other two scattered around the top 20. Returning to the runner-up spot is Lewis Capaldi’s “Before You Go” up 10 spaces to number-two.

Dua Lipa’s “Don’t Start Now”, unfortunately not seeing much chance at hitting #1 at this stage, is up 11 spaces to number-three. I know these massive climbs look important but they are really not actually worth much note at all since it’s just a result of managing through the Christmas blockade.

Up 12 spots to number-four is “ROXANNE” by Arizona Zervas.

Rebounding to number-five is the former #1 “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I up 15 spaces to number-five.

Billie Eilish’s “everything i wanted” is also in the top 10 at number-six, as it is up 16 positions this week.

Entering the top 10 for the first time is Harry Styles’ “Adore You”, up 19 spaces to number-seven and becoming Styles’ third entry in the top 10.

Our remaining leftover from last week, excluding the Stormzy songs outside of the top 10, “Pump it Up” by Endor reaches the top 10 for the first time up a whopping 28 spaces to number-eight, which may just be one of our biggest one-week climbs ever. It’s Endor’s first top 10, but I predict he won’t get many more in all honesty. We’ll see though.

Since everything else is a new arrival, returning entry or random Stormzy song that climbed, we have a lot of new peaks this week, including “This is Real” by Jax Jones featuring Ella Henderson, which returns at number-nine, becoming Jones’ sixth top 10 and Henderson’s fourth.

Finally, rounding off the top 10, we have “Lose You to Love Me”, returning to the top 10 at #10 as a re-entry to the top 40.

Climbers

Well, we only have two climbers for songs that were here last week, outside of the top 10, and they’re both Stormzy: “Vossi Bop” is seemingly making a second run, up 28 spaces to #12, and “Audacity” featuring Headie One is up 22 spaces to #16.

Fallers

Ellie Goulding’s cover of Joni Mitchell’s “River” fell immensely from its false #1 spot last week, because it is down 27 spots to #28, which is an unfortunate loss but should make it obvious that label politics are the only thing that got this to #1.

Returning Entries

Before the new arrivals, we will have to book-end our Christmas season with our returning entries, the songs that weathered the Christmas storm but are back in full force afterwards, claiming some form of victory, I suppose. Okay, so “Blinding Lights” by The Weeknd is back at #11, “Falling” by Trevor Daniel is at #14, “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi is at #15, “Watermelon Sugar” and “Lights Up” by Harry Styles are back at #17 and #18 respectively, “Into the Unknown” by Idina Menzel and AURORA, from the Frozen II soundtrack and hence a song I’m counting as our second Christmas single still on the chart, has returned to #19, alongside seemingly its polar opposite, “Don’t Rush” by Young T & Bugsey with Headie One back at #20. “Memories” by Maroon 5 is back at #21, “Gangsta” by Darkoo and One Acen at #22, “Ride It” by Regard featuring Jay Sean making its way back to #23, “Bruises” by Lewis Capaldi unfortunately returning at #24, “Heartless” by the Weeknd is back at #25, “bad guy” by Billie Eilish shows up completely out of the blue at #26 and “Lucid Dreams” by the late Juice WRLD has returned once again at #27. “Better Half of Me” by Tom Walker is back at #30, “Lose Control” by MEDUZA, Goodboys and Becky Hill is back at #31, “South of the Border” by Ed Sheeran featuring Camila Cabello and Cardi B is back at #32, “Netflix & Chill” by Fredo is at #34, “hot girl summer” by blackbear is at #35, “Circles” by Post Malone is at #36, “Must Be” by J Hus is at #37 and finally, “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus of all songs is back at #38. Now for our new arrivals, which much like right before we had to fend off the Christmas songs, it’s just a couple of viral trap-rap hits.

NEW ARRIVALS

#40 – “The Box” – Roddy Ricch

Produced by 30 Roc – Peaked at #3 in the US

Roddy Ricch is a Californian rapper who is one of the newest crop of rising Auto-Tune-fuelled sing-rappers like Lil Tjay, Polo G, et cetera, although Roddy takes more influence from Young Thug, and you can definitely tell, in fact as a pretty big fan of Young Thug at least since recently, Roddy comes off as a bit of a rip-off or discount version at times, since I sense a lack of variation and honestly a lack of any true “weird” lines or oddities that make Thugger stand out as much. Roddy, or as BBC has mistakenly called him in his first UK Top 40 hit, “Roddy Rich”, has inflections that just seem awfully standard. That’s why I was excited when I heard “The Box”, from his debut studio album, because it starts with a muffled brass loop under strings and Roddy meekly repeating in his falsetto, “eee-err”, and it continues throughout most of the song, even when the beat actually kicks in. The beat is actually pretty weird too, with a reversed 808 bass that just comes in sporadically instead of a normal 808 bass. It’s really odd and really strange but it works because Roddy embraces it, with a fluid flow that switches inflection and delivery constantly, keeping with no motif or theme for more than four bars. He also attempts the very Young Thug method of making a punchline by saying a normal, somewhat funny line and then pausing for a beat or two, just to come back by saying, “Mm” or “Yeah”. The beat ends in a very cool way too, with the brass and strings loop playing without any percussion, until it reverses and the song ends with the rubbery reversed 808. It sounds really atmospheric and a lot better than how it sounds from my description. Roddy also says a lot of nonsense here that’s actually pretty funny, like how he’s supposedly a 2020 presidential candidate? Also, Roddy, Aaliyah’s dead, I mean, she looked great whilst alive, but if you have a “b**** that’s looking like Aaliyah”, chances are she’s not a model, or at least not anymore. A bit of a morbid point to end on, but this song is pretty fun. I still prefer “Ballin’” though.

#39 – “No Idea” – Don Toliver

Produced by WondaGurl and Cubeatz – Peaked at #25 in Canada and #43 in the US

Don Toliver is a rapper and singer from Texas who is signed to Travis Scott’s Cactus Jack imprint and featured on their debut compilation album, JACKBOYS, which made several appearances outside of the UK Top 40 this week, but none within our little range, but we do have this viral TikTok-propelled hit, “No Idea”, which is often considered his breakout single, and his first UK Top 40 hit. I find Don Toliver mostly tolerable, although I didn’t particularly like him on “GANG GANG” or “CAN’T SAY”. I would describe this song as pretty forgettable, actually, despite the admittedly interesting and pretty flute loop, which is immediately and abruptly drowned out by the vocals, drenched in way too many levels of ugly reverb and Auto-Tune. Yeah, Toliver sounds pretty awful here, and he’s just clearly ripping off his mentor Travis Scott with some of his inflections and even the YAH! ad-lib. The bass mastering is questionable and the song seems to have an aimless structure, with Toliver just breezing through lyric after lyric with no substance or content to speak of, and even a bridge for him to just ad-lib over the beat for about half a minute. The falsetto part is borderline unlistenable, especially when all of the overdubs and multi-tracks start clipping, even though that might be intentional. Yeah, no, this is garbage, as expected.

#33 – “No Denying” – J Hus

Produced by TobiShyBoy

J Hus has released a second single from his upcoming album after “Must Be”, which if you remember I absolutely loved, and we all know him by now and I told his story and legal issues last time, so no needless pre-amble this time. It’s J Hus’ ninth UK Top 40 hit and, to no surprise, it’s pretty good. It starts with this intense string loop, with some brass and a rowdy tone, building up for the beat drop, where J Hus abandons his mellow mumbling for raspy and aggressive spitting over a drill beat, and it’s pretty intense, as well as just sounding great, with some sweet 808 rolls, although the transitions between chorus and verse feel increasingly abrupt, even if the drill beat is added to the chorus after the first time. J Hus’ content isn’t any interesting this time around, either, and I think that’s why it hasn’t debuted that high. The second verse is just kind of boring, and the slightly off-beat chorus soon loses its lustre. I wish I liked this more, and there are things I like about it, especially the instrumental, but I’m not sure Hus did it any justice this time around. I still enjoy his casual bars that pay no mind to careless gang violence because I just think they’re pretty funny, especially when he treats killing someone in response to racial abuse like a normal weekday in the second verse, but this song does pretty much nothing for me past the first verse.

#29 – “No Cellular Site” – D-Block Europe

Produced by Kyle Junior

Now, here we go. Here is some interesting stuff: D-Block Europe. Young Adz and Dirtbike LB, two of the funniest rappers from the United Kingdom, of course, by complete freak accident and pure incompetence. They released a mixtape (their third of 2019) in late December and it seems to have just been swept under the rug for the most part as it seems like a rushed, boring tracklist. It’s got one feature and it’s not a big one at all, so this is the single, seemingly, probably because it’s got a video and for no other reason. This is the one people decided to watch the video for, and conveniently early in the tracklist. It’s their seventh UK Top 40 hit and curiously, I actually quite liked their last song with DigDat, “New Dior”, and maybe these guys have genuinely improved. Yeah, no, not really. They’ve abandoned the guitar, instead going for a gross MIDI flute that barely passes as a melody and allows for a bunch of silence in the beat. It’s just really empty and refuses to develop or build up to anything, even when the beat comes in. The beat is garbage but the men themselves haven’t changed. Young Adz is still the lead here, with his signature mumbling in the intro and handling the hook as well. I think his new ad-lib is a breathy “gyehr”. His flow switches in the first verse but it doesn’t sound natural or organic, and he trails off at the end of the bar, with a weird, vocodered ad-lib that just repeats the last line failing to fill up empty space. The chorus sounds really freaking awkward as well, especially as the verse ends not with an ad-lib but with reverb-heavy humming, before the chorus comes in and the beat can’t decide if it wants to come in or not, so it’s just hi-hats, a gross 808 and murmuring ad-libs for a while. Dirtbike LB’s verse is mixed in a completely different way, but the beat drowns it and a beeping flatline starts playing under his attempt at a soulful melody in the second half of the verse and it sounds pretty heartfelt, detailing his mother’s plight when he went to hospital for a drug overdose. Too bad it has no relation to anything else here, and Young Adz has a second verse for some reason as well. I have no idea why the last chorus sounds like it was recorded through the telephone, or why the song ends with the flute MIDI literally cutting off before the note ends. The lyrics here are terrible as always, but have those same odd, janky quirks they always do. Young Adz has codeine swimming inside him, doesn’t know if the “famous hoe” in his car is from Geordie Shore or Love Island, and saw a gun and sold cocaine before his virginity was taken, because that’s info we need to know. Of course, I appreciate the body positivity in the chorus, I suppose. This song is oddly focused on mothers as well, as he told the person he’s selling drugs to, to not tell his parents, and also draws the line when you start pouring champagne on your Rolex. Sure. Also this line is really funny to me for some reason:

I cannot deny that a [gnarly dude] need drugs

#13 – “My Oh My” – Camila Cabello featuring DaBaby

Produced by Frank Dukes and Louis Bell

Our last song is the single from Cabello’s second album, Romance, in which she experienced a severe sophomore slump critically and commercially, mostly because there is not a single track on the album that is enjoyable. It is possibly one of the worst albums of last year, just out of sheer disregard for both quality and trying to be unique. It is a generic heap of nothingness, and for whatever reason, it has DaBaby on it (He’s the only feature apart from Shawn Mendes). It’s Cabello’s twelfth UK Top 40 hit, and surprisingly enough, the first entry for North Carolina trap-rapper DaBaby, who I have talked about here before. He’s funny, charismatic and raunchy but can get very samey and sometimes his feature verses are just awkward, including this one. The song starts with some eerie, quirky vintage synths that sound pretty cool, but the horn section just punches in and I hear in the distance, a manic Camila Cabello obnoxiously laughing, and I’m immediately pulled out of whatever this is. It’s almost quite overwhelming actually, because a lot happens at the same time. Cabello’s voice is squeaky as either, the backing vocals are Auto-Tuned badly and add so much unnecessary vibrato that it sounds mildly off-key at times. The percussion is awfully mixed, with the trap beat, especially the 808s and kick drums being at the front of the mix, which makes no sense. It’s stiff, awkward and not sexy at all, mostly because Cabello sounds like she’s in pain 90% of the time, and I’m not for kinkshaming but off-key gang vocals aren’t hot. DaBaby’s “Let’s go” sounds so sad and tired, so you can tell from the post-chorus that he doesn’t want to be here, and yeah, his verse proves this. Apparently he’s “going Bieber”. Sure. This sucks.

Conclusion

I’ve got to say, not a great week, but the transition weeks between years are often a bit like this. Best of the Week is going to “The Box” by Roddy Ricch, with an honourable mention towards “No Denying” by J Hus. Worst of the Week goes to “No Idea” by Don Toliver and D-Block Europe don’t escape free, as they get the dishonourable mention for “No Cellular Site”. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank, I’ll see you next week.

REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020

[beardcore-blog]

A Princess Diary

"What’s Wrong With Cinderella?"

I finally came unhinged in the dentist’s office — one of those ritzy pediatric practices tricked out with comic books, DVDs and arcade games — where I’d taken my 3-year-old daughter for her first exam. Until then, I’d held my tongue. I’d smiled politely every time the supermarket-checkout clerk greeted her with ”Hi, Princess”; ignored the waitress at our local breakfast joint who called the funny-face pancakes she ordered her ”princess meal”; made no comment when the lady at Longs Drugs said, ”I bet I know your favorite color” and handed her a pink balloon rather than letting her choose for herself. Maybe it was the dentist’s Betty Boop inflection that got to me, but when she pointed to the exam chair and said, ”Would you like to sit in my special princess throne so I can sparkle your teeth?” I lost it.

”Oh, for God’s sake,” I snapped. ”Do you have a princess drill, too?”

She stared at me as if I were an evil stepmother.

”Come on!” I continued, my voice rising. ”It’s 2006, not 1950. This is Berkeley, Calif. Does every little girl really have to be a princess?”

My daughter, who was reaching for a Cinderella sticker, looked back and forth between us. ”Why are you so mad, Mama?” she asked. ”What’s wrong with princesses?”

Diana may be dead and Masako disgraced, but here in America, we are in the midst of a royal moment. To call princesses a ”trend” among girls is like calling Harry Potter a book. Sales at Disney Consumer Products, which started the craze six years ago by packaging nine of its female characters under one royal rubric, have shot up to $3 billion, globally, this year, from $300 million in 2001. There are now more than 25,000 Disney Princess items. ”Princess,” as some Disney execs call it, is not only the fastest-growing brand the company has ever created; they say it is on its way to becoming the largest girls’ franchise on the planet.

Meanwhile in 2001, Mattel brought out its own ”world of girl” line of princess Barbie dolls, DVDs, toys, clothing, home décor and myriad other products. At a time when Barbie sales were declining domestically, they became instant best sellers. Shortly before that, Mary Drolet, a Chicago-area mother and former Claire’s and Montgomery Ward executive, opened Club Libby Lu, now a chain of mall stores based largely in the suburbs in which girls ages 4 to 12 can shop for ”Princess Phones” covered in faux fur and attend ”Princess-Makeover Birthday Parties.” Saks bought Club Libby Lu in 2003 for $12 million and has since expanded it to 87 outlets; by 2005, with only scant local advertising, revenues hovered around the $46 million mark, a 53 percent jump from the previous year. Pink, it seems, is the new gold.

Even Dora the Explorer, the intrepid, dirty-kneed adventurer, has ascended to the throne: in 2004, after a two-part episode in which she turns into a ”true princess,” the Nickelodeon and Viacom consumer-products division released a satin-gowned ”Magic Hair Fairytale Dora,” with hair that grows or shortens when her crown is touched. Among other phrases the bilingual doll utters: ”Vámonos! Let’s go to fairy-tale land!” and ”Will you brush my hair?”

As a feminist mother — not to mention a nostalgic product of the Grranimals era — I have been taken by surprise by the princess craze and the girlie-girl culture that has risen around it. What happened to William wanting a doll and not dressing your cat in an apron? Whither Marlo Thomas? I watch my fellow mothers, women who once swore they’d never be dependent on a man, smile indulgently at daughters who warble ”So This Is Love” or insist on being called Snow White. I wonder if they’d concede so readily to sons who begged for combat fatigues and mock AK-47s.

More to the point, when my own girl makes her daily beeline for the dress-up corner of her preschool classroom — something I’m convinced she does largely to torture me — I worry about what playing Little Mermaid is teaching her. I’ve spent much of my career writing about experiences that undermine girls’ well-being, warning parents that a preoccupation with body and beauty (encouraged by films, TV, magazines and, yes, toys) is perilous to their daughters’ mental and physical health. Am I now supposed to shrug and forget all that? If trafficking in stereotypes doesn’t matter at 3, when does it matter? At 6? Eight? Thirteen?

On the other hand, maybe I’m still surfing a washed-out second wave of feminism in a third-wave world. Maybe princesses are in fact a sign of progress, an indication that girls can embrace their predilection for pink without compromising strength or ambition; that, at long last, they can ”have it all.” Or maybe it is even less complex than that: to mangle Freud, maybe a princess is sometimes just a princess. And, as my daughter wants to know, what’s wrong with that?

The rise of the Disney princesses reads like a fairy tale itself, with Andy Mooney, a former Nike executive, playing the part of prince, riding into the company on a metaphoric white horse in January 2000 to save a consumer-products division whose sales were dropping by as much as 30 percent a year. Both overstretched and underfocused, the division had triggered price wars by granting multiple licenses for core products (say, Winnie-the-Pooh undies) while ignoring the potential of new media. What’s more, Disney films like ”A Bug’s Life” in 1998 had yielded few merchandising opportunities — what child wants to snuggle up with an ant?

It was about a month after Mooney’s arrival that the magic struck. That’s when he flew to Phoenix to check out his first ”Disney on Ice” show. ”Standing in line in the arena, I was surrounded by little girls dressed head to toe as princesses,” he told me last summer in his palatial office, then located in Burbank, and speaking in a rolling Scottish burr. ”They weren’t even Disney products. They were generic princess products they’d appended to a Halloween costume. And the light bulb went off. Clearly there was latent demand here. So the next morning I said to my team, ‘O.K., let’s establish standards and a color palette and talk to licensees and get as much product out there as we possibly can that allows these girls to do what they’re doing anyway: projecting themselves into the characters from the classic movies.’ ”

Mooney picked a mix of old and new heroines to wear the Pantone pink No. 241 corona: Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Ariel, Belle, Jasmine, Mulan and Pocahontas. It was the first time Disney marketed characters separately from a film’s release, let alone lumped together those from different stories. To ensure the sanctity of what Mooney called their individual ”mythologies,” the princesses never make eye contact when they’re grouped: each stares off in a slightly different direction as if unaware of the others’ presence.

It is also worth noting that not all of the ladies are of royal extraction. Part of the genius of ”Princess” is that its meaning is so broadly constructed that it actually has no meaning. Even Tinker Bell was originally a Princess, though her reign didn’t last. ”We’d always debate over whether she was really a part of the Princess mythology,” Mooney recalled. ”She really wasn’t.” Likewise, Mulan and Pocahontas, arguably the most resourceful of the bunch, are rarely depicted on Princess merchandise, though for a different reason. Their rustic garb has less bling potential than that of old-school heroines like Sleeping Beauty. (When Mulan does appear, she is typically in the kimonolike hanfu, which makes her miserable in the movie, rather than her liberated warrior’s gear.)

The first Princess items, released with no marketing plan, no focus groups, no advertising, sold as if blessed by a fairy godmother. To this day, Disney conducts little market research on the Princess line, relying instead on the power of its legacy among mothers as well as the instant-read sales barometer of the theme parks and Disney Stores. ”We simply gave girls what they wanted,” Mooney said of the line’s success, ”although I don’t think any of us grasped how much they wanted this. I wish I could sit here and take credit for having some grand scheme to develop this, but all we did was envision a little girl’s room and think about how she could live out the princess fantasy. The counsel we gave to licensees was: What type of bedding would a princess want to sleep in? What kind of alarm clock would a princess want to wake up to? What type of television would a princess like to see? It’s a rare case where you find a girl who has every aspect of her room bedecked in Princess, but if she ends up with three or four of these items, well, then you have a very healthy business.”

Every reporter Mooney talks to asks some version of my next question: Aren’t the Princesses, who are interested only in clothes, jewelry and cadging the handsome prince, somewhat retrograde role models?

”Look,” he said, ”I have friends whose son went through the Power Rangers phase who castigated themselves over what they must’ve done wrong. Then they talked to other parents whose kids had gone through it. The boy passes through. The girl passes through. I see girls expanding their imagination through visualizing themselves as princesses, and then they pass through that phase and end up becoming lawyers, doctors, mothers or princesses, whatever the case may be.”

Mooney has a point: There are no studies proving that playing princess directly damages girls’ self-esteem or dampens other aspirations. On the other hand, there is evidence that young women who hold the most conventionally feminine beliefs — who avoid conflict and think they should be perpetually nice and pretty — are more likely to be depressed than others and less likely to use contraception. What’s more, the 23 percent decline in girls’ participation in sports and other vigorous activity between middle and high school has been linked to their sense that athletics is unfeminine. And in a survey released last October by Girls Inc., school-age girls overwhelmingly reported a paralyzing pressure to be ”perfect”: not only to get straight A’s and be the student-body president, editor of the newspaper and captain of the swim team but also to be ”kind and caring,” ”please everyone, be very thin and dress right.” Give those girls a pumpkin and a glass slipper and they’d be in business.

At the grocery store one day, my daughter noticed a little girl sporting a Cinderella backpack. ”There’s that princess you don’t like, Mama!” she shouted.

”Um, yeah,” I said, trying not to meet the other mother’s hostile gaze.

”Don’t you like her blue dress, Mama?”

I had to admit, I did.

She thought about this. ”Then don’t you like her face?”

”Her face is all right,” I said, noncommittally, though I’m not thrilled to have my Japanese-Jewish child in thrall to those Aryan features. (And what the heck are those blue things covering her ears?) ”It’s just, honey, Cinderella doesn’t really do anything.”

Over the next 45 minutes, we ran through that conversation, verbatim, approximately 37 million times, as my daughter pointed out Disney Princess Band-Aids, Disney Princess paper cups, Disney Princess lip balm, Disney Princess pens, Disney Princess crayons and Disney Princess notebooks — all cleverly displayed at the eye level of a 3-year-old trapped in a shopping cart — as well as a bouquet of Disney Princess balloons bobbing over the checkout line. The repetition was excessive, even for a preschooler. What was it about my answers that confounded her? What if, instead of realizing: Aha! Cinderella is a symbol of the patriarchal oppression of all women, another example of corporate mind control and power-to-the-people! my 3-year-old was thinking, Mommy doesn’t want me to be a girl?

According to theories of gender constancy, until they’re about 6 or 7, children don’t realize that the sex they were born with is immutable. They believe that they have a choice: they can grow up to be either a mommy or a daddy. Some psychologists say that until permanency sets in kids embrace whatever stereotypes our culture presents, whether it’s piling on the most spangles or attacking one another with light sabers. What better way to assure that they’ll always remain themselves? If that’s the case, score one for Mooney. By not buying the Princess Pull-Ups, I may be inadvertently communicating that being female (to the extent that my daughter is able to understand it) is a bad thing.

Anyway, you have to give girls some credit. It’s true that, according to Mattel, one of the most popular games young girls play is ”bride,” but Disney found that a groom or prince is incidental to that fantasy, a regrettable necessity at best. Although they keep him around for the climactic kiss, he is otherwise relegated to the bottom of the toy box, which is why you don’t see him prominently displayed in stores.

What’s more, just because they wear the tulle doesn’t mean they’ve drunk the Kool-Aid. Plenty of girls stray from the script, say, by playing basketball in their finery, or casting themselves as the powerful evil stepsister bossing around the sniveling Cinderella. I recall a headline-grabbing 2005 British study that revealed that girls enjoy torturing, decapitating and microwaving their Barbies nearly as much as they like to dress them up for dates. There is spice along with that sugar after all, though why this was news is beyond me: anyone who ever played with the doll knows there’s nothing more satisfying than hacking off all her hair and holding her underwater in the bathtub. Princesses can even be a boon to exasperated parents: in our house, for instance, royalty never whines and uses the potty every single time.

”Playing princess is not the issue,” argues Lyn Mikel Brown, an author, with Sharon Lamb, of ”Packaging Girlhood: Rescuing Our Daughters From Marketers’ Schemes.” ”The issue is 25,000 Princess products,” says Brown, a professor of education and human development at Colby College. ”When one thing is so dominant, then it’s no longer a choice: it’s a mandate, cannibalizing all other forms of play. There’s the illusion of more choices out there for girls, but if you look around, you’ll see their choices are steadily narrowing.”

It’s hard to imagine that girls’ options could truly be shrinking when they dominate the honor roll and outnumber boys in college. Then again, have you taken a stroll through a children’s store lately? A year ago, when we shopped for ”big girl” bedding at Pottery Barn Kids, we found the ”girls” side awash in flowers, hearts and hula dancers; not a soccer player or sailboat in sight. Across the no-fly zone, the ”boys” territory was all about sports, trains, planes and automobiles. Meanwhile, Baby GAP’s boys’ onesies were emblazoned with ”Big Man on Campus” and the girls’ with ”Social Butterfly”; guess whose matching shoes were decorated on the soles with hearts and whose sported a ”No. 1” logo? And at Toys ”R” Us, aisles of pink baby dolls, kitchens, shopping carts and princesses unfurl a safe distance from the ”Star Wars” figures, GeoTrax and tool chests. The relentless resegregation of childhood appears to have sneaked up without any further discussion about sex roles, about what it now means to be a boy or to be a girl. Or maybe it has happened in lieu of such discussion because it’s easier this way.

Easier, that is, unless you want to buy your daughter something that isn’t pink. Girls’ obsession with that color may seem like something they’re born with, like the ability to breathe or talk on the phone for hours on end. But according to Jo Paoletti, an associate professor of American studies at the University of Maryland, it ain’t so. When colors were first introduced to the nursery in the early part of the 20th century, pink was considered the more masculine hue, a pastel version of red. Blue, with its intimations of the Virgin Mary, constancy and faithfulness, was thought to be dainty. Why or when that switched is not clear, but as late as the 1930s a significant percentage of adults in one national survey held to that split. Perhaps that’s why so many early Disney heroines — Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Wendy, Alice-in-Wonderland — are swathed in varying shades of azure. (Purple, incidentally, may be the next color to swap teams: once the realm of kings and N.F.L. players, it is fast becoming the bolder girl’s version of pink.)

It wasn’t until the mid-1980s, when amplifying age and sex differences became a key strategy of children’s marketing (recall the emergence of ” ‘tween”), that pink became seemingly innate to girls, part of what defined them as female, at least for the first few years. That was also the time that the first of the generation raised during the unisex phase of feminism — ah, hither Marlo! — became parents. ”The kids who grew up in the 1970s wanted sharp definitions for their own kids,” Paoletti told me. ”I can understand that, because the unisex thing denied everything — you couldn’t be this, you couldn’t be that, you had to be a neutral nothing.”

The infatuation with the girlie girl certainly could, at least in part, be a reaction against the so-called second wave of the women’s movement of the 1960s and ’70s (the first wave was the fight for suffrage), which fought for reproductive rights and economic, social and legal equality. If nothing else, pink and Princess have resuscitated the fantasy of romance that that era of feminism threatened, the privileges that traditional femininity conferred on women despite its costs — doors magically opened, dinner checks picked up, Manolo Blahniks. Frippery. Fun. Why should we give up the perks of our sex until we’re sure of what we’ll get in exchange? Why should we give them up at all? Or maybe it’s deeper than that: the freedoms feminism bestowed came with an undercurrent of fear among women themselves — flowing through ”Ally McBeal,” ”Bridget Jones’s Diary,” ”Sex and the City” — of losing male love, of never marrying, of not having children, of being deprived of something that felt essentially and exclusively female.

I mulled that over while flipping through ”The Paper Bag Princess,” a 1980 picture book hailed as an antidote to Disney. The heroine outwits a dragon who has kidnapped her prince, but not before the beast’s fiery breath frizzles her hair and destroys her dress, forcing her to don a paper bag. The ungrateful prince rejects her, telling her to come back when she is ”dressed like a real princess.” She dumps him and skips off into the sunset, happily ever after, alone.

There you have it, ”Thelma and Louise” all over again. Step out of line, and you end up solo or, worse, sailing crazily over a cliff to your doom. Alternatives like those might send you skittering right back to the castle. And I get that: the fact is, though I want my daughter to do and be whatever she wants as an adult, I still hope she’ll find her Prince Charming and have babies, just as I have. I don’t want her to be a fish without a bicycle; I want her to be a fish with another fish. Preferably, one who loves and respects her and also does the dishes and half the child care.

There had to be a middle ground between compliant and defiant, between petticoats and paper bags. I remembered a video on YouTube, an ad for a Nintendo game called Super Princess Peach. It showed a pack of girls in tiaras, gowns and elbow-length white gloves sliding down a zip line on parasols, navigating an obstacle course of tires in their stilettos, slithering on their bellies under barbed wire, then using their telekinetic powers to make a climbing wall burst into flames. ”If you can stand up to really mean people,” an announcer intoned, ”maybe you have what it takes to be a princess.”

Now here were some girls who had grit as well as grace. I loved Princess Peach even as I recognized that there was no way she could run in those heels, that her peachiness did nothing to upset the apple cart of expectation: she may have been athletic, smart and strong, but she was also adorable. Maybe she’s what those once-unisex, postfeminist parents are shooting for: the melding of old and new standards. And perhaps that’s a good thing, the ideal solution. But what to make, then, of the young women in the Girls Inc. survey? It doesn’t seem to be ”having it all” that’s getting to them; it’s the pressure to be it all. In telling our girls they can be anything, we have inadvertently demanded that they be everything. To everyone. All the time. No wonder the report was titled ”The Supergirl Dilemma.”

The princess as superhero is not irrelevant. Some scholars I spoke with say that given its post-9/11 timing, princess mania is a response to a newly dangerous world. ”Historically, princess worship has emerged during periods of uncertainty and profound social change,” observes Miriam Forman-Brunell, a historian at the University of Missouri-Kansas City. Francis Hodgson Burnett’s original”Little Princess” was published at a time of rapid urbanization, immigration and poverty; Shirley Temple’s film version was a hit during the Great Depression. ”The original folk tales themselves,” Forman-Brunell says, ”spring from medieval and early modern European culture that faced all kinds of economic and demographic and social upheaval — famine, war, disease, terror of wolves. Girls play savior during times of economic crisis and instability.” That’s a heavy burden for little shoulders. Perhaps that’s why the magic wand has become an essential part of the princess get-up. In the original stories — even the Disney versions of them — it’s not the girl herself who’s magic; it’s the fairy godmother. Now if Forman-Brunell is right, we adults have become the cursed creatures whom girls have the thaumaturgic power to transform.

In the 1990s, third-wave feminists rebelled against their dour big sisters, ”reclaiming” sexual objectification as a woman’s right — provided, of course, that it was on her own terms, that she was the one choosing to strip or wear a shirt that said ”Porn Star” or make out with her best friend at a frat-house bash. They embraced words like ”bitch” and ”slut” as terms of affection and empowerment. That is, when used by the right people, with the right dash of playful irony. But how can you assure that? As Madonna gave way to Britney, whatever self-determination that message contained was watered down and commodified until all that was left was a gaggle of 6-year-old girls in belly-baring T-shirts (which I’m guessing they don’t wear as cultural critique). It is no wonder that parents, faced with thongs for 8-year-olds and Bratz dolls’ ”passion for fashion,” fill their daughters’ closets with pink sateen; the innocence of Princess feels like a reprieve.

”But what does that mean?” asks Sharon Lamb, a psychology professor at Saint Michael’s College. ”There are other ways to express ‘innocence’ — girls could play ladybug or caterpillar. What you’re really talking about is sexual purity. And there’s a trap at the end of that rainbow, because the natural progression from pale, innocent pink is not to other colors. It’s to hot, sexy pink — exactly the kind of sexualization parents are trying to avoid.”

Lamb suggested that to see for myself how ”Someday My Prince Will Come” morphs into ”Oops! I Did It Again,” I visit Club Libby Lu, the mall shop dedicated to the ”Very Important Princess.”

Walking into one of the newest links in the store’s chain, in Natick, Mass., last summer, I had to tip my tiara to the founder, Mary Drolet: Libby Lu’s design was flawless. Unlike Disney, Drolet depended on focus groups to choose the logo (a crown-topped heart) and the colors (pink, pink, purple and more pink). The displays were scaled to the size of a 10-year-old, though most of the shoppers I saw were several years younger than that. The decals on the walls and dressing rooms — ”I Love Your Hair,” ”Hip Chick,” ”Spoiled” — were written in ”girlfriend language.” The young sales clerks at this ”special secret club for superfabulous girls” are called ”club counselors” and come off like your coolest baby sitter, the one who used to let you brush her hair. The malls themselves are chosen based on a company formula called the G.P.I., or ”Girl Power Index,” which predicts potential sales revenues. Talk about newspeak: ”Girl Power” has gone from a riot grrrrl anthem to ”I Am Woman, Watch Me Shop.”

Inside, the store was divided into several glittery ”shopping zones” called ”experiences”: Libby’s Laboratory, now called Sparkle Spa, where girls concoct their own cosmetics and bath products; Libby’s Room; Ear Piercing; Pooch Parlor (where divas in training can pamper stuffed poodles, pugs and Chihuahuas); and the Style Studio, offering ”Libby Du” makeover choices, including ‘Tween Idol, Rock Star, Pop Star and, of course, Priceless Princess. Each look includes hairstyle, makeup, nail polish and sparkly tattoos.

As I browsed, I noticed a mother standing in the center of the store holding a price list for makeover birthday parties — $22.50 to $35 per child. Her name was Anne McAuliffe; her daughters — Stephanie, 4, and 7-year-old twins Rory and Sarah — were dashing giddily up and down the aisles.

”They’ve been begging to come to this store for three weeks,” McAuliffe said. ”I’d never heard of it. So I said they could, but they’d have to spend their own money if they bought anything.” She looked around. ”Some of this stuff is innocuous,” she observed, then leaned toward me, eyes wide and stage-whispered: ”But … a lot of it is horrible. It makes them look like little prostitutes. It’s crazy. They’re babies!”

As we debated the line between frivolous fun and JonBenét, McAuliffe’s daughter Rory came dashing up, pigtails haphazard, glasses askew. ”They have the best pocketbooks here,” she said breathlessly, brandishing a clutch with the words ”Girlie Girl” stamped on it. ”Please, can I have one? It has sequins!”

”You see that?” McAuliffe asked, gesturing at the bag. ”What am I supposed to say?”

On my way out of the mall, I popped into the ” ‘tween” mecca Hot Topic, where a display of Tinker Bell items caught my eye. Tinker Bell, whose image racks up an annual $400 million in retail sales with no particular effort on Disney’s part, is poised to wreak vengeance on the Princess line that once expelled her. Last winter, the first chapter book designed to introduce girls to Tink and her Pixie Hollow pals spent 18 weeks on The New York Times children’s best-seller list. In a direct-to-DVD now under production, she will speak for the first time, voiced by the actress Brittany Murphy. Next year, Disney Fairies will be rolled out in earnest. Aimed at 6- to 9-year-old girls, the line will catch them just as they outgrow Princess. Their colors will be lavender, green, turquoise — anything but the Princess’s soon-to-be-babyish pink.

To appeal to that older child, Disney executives said, the Fairies will have more ”attitude” and ”sass” than the Princesses. What, I wondered, did that entail? I’d seen some of the Tinker Bell merchandise that Disney sells at its theme parks: T-shirts reading, ”Spoiled to Perfection,” ”Mood Subject to Change Without Notice” and ”Tinker Bell: Prettier Than a Princess.” At Hot Topic, that edge was even sharper: magnets, clocks, light-switch plates and panties featured ”Dark Tink,” described as ”the bad girl side of Miss Bell that Walt never saw.”

Girl power, indeed.

A few days later, I picked my daughter up from preschool. She came tearing over in a full-skirted frock with a gold bodice, a beaded crown perched sideways on her head. ”Look, Mommy, I’m Ariel!” she crowed. referring to Disney’s Little Mermaid. Then she stopped and furrowed her brow. ”Mommy, do you like Ariel?”

I considered her for a moment. Maybe Princess is the first salvo in what will become a lifelong struggle over her body image, a Hundred Years’ War of dieting, plucking, painting and perpetual dissatisfaction with the results. Or maybe it isn’t. I’ll never really know. In the end, it’s not the Princesses that really bother me anyway. They’re just a trigger for the bigger question of how, over the years, I can help my daughter with the contradictions she will inevitably face as a girl, the dissonance that is as endemic as ever to growing up female. Maybe the best I can hope for is that her generation will get a little further with the solutions than we did.

For now, I kneeled down on the floor and gave my daughter a hug.

She smiled happily. ”But, Mommy?” she added. ”When I grow up, I’m still going to be a fireman.”

– by Peggy Orenstein, for the New York Times Magazine (December 2006)

Posted by lukewho on 2007-01-01 19:50:52

Tagged: , fremont , christmas , 2006 , jacinto , princess , disney

The post A Princess Diary appeared first on Good Info.

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Ch. 1 “Knock Knock” Analysis Doctor Who S10.4: “Pop Goes the Weasel”: Several Important References

Finally Canon & Things Aren’t Happening the Way They Appear

I don’t have time this week to post a lot.  Next week, unfortunately I won’t have time to post anything about the upcoming episode “Oxygen,” where it looks like payment is coming due in that episode for Bill.  The Doctor won’t be able to move on so easily from that.  And “Knock Knock” signaled that the Doctor is not immune from long-term, so to speak, canon damage.  He will end up paying in a way we haven’t seen before.

Anyway, in “Knock Knock,” we got another huge canon admission!  Yeah!  At the end of the episode regarding the Vault scene, the Doctor finally says that he is a prisoner, something we’ve seen for a very long time in the subtext.

However, things in “Knock Knock” aren’t happening, as they seem.  Right at the start, Pavel plays his phonograph, but there is an upside-down, reflection on the record.  Therefore, things are opposite of how they appear.  We see this reflection several times, including the scene when Pavel is part of the wall as Bill, Shireen, and the landlord discuss the situation.  In fact, this is echoed by the metaphor “Pop Goes the Weasel,” which refers to an illusion from Classic Who that we’ll discuss in a few minutes.

Before I explain a few things from the first part of the episode, I want to go over the Vault scene because “Pop Goes the Weasel” brings in a lot of subtext.

 Doctor Weirdness & Vault Scene

Does the Doctor seem off to you, especially starting at the end of the haunted house scene where the Doctor seems callous with the students’ plight of losing all of their housing and belongings?  He says, “Better luck next time” and leaves.  Is it really the face of the Doctor we think it is?

In fact, he sounds like the 12th Doctor in his 8th season:

DOCTOR: Are you being cheerful? I'm against cheerful.

He may be the schizoid man, which also has a reference to “Pop Goes the Weasel.”

 Lots of Food Not Necessarily a Good Sign

Next, we see Nardole talking to whomever behind the Vault door, and then we see the Doctor with 2 big bags of Mexican food, shown below.  How many people are in the Vault?  That is a lot of food.  BTW, this Vault scene looks like it was filmed later in the season because the Doctor’s hair is longer and more unwieldy.  

 All the food here plus something said at the beginning of the episode between the Doctor and Bill about food may mean the Doctor is not himself:

DOCTOR: Sleep's for tortoises.

BILL: Not Time Lords?

DOCTOR: No! Unless we've regenerated or had a big lunch.

BILL: Regenerated?

Sleeping and a big lunch is a reference to “The Two Doctors” episode with the 2nd and 6th Doctors, where the Sontarans and others are trying to master time travel. The 2nd Doctor is temporarily converted into an Androgum, a race of voracious gourmands.  He eats so much food that he falls asleep at the table.

With a seemingly voracious appetite, is the 12th Doctor being converted? The only other time that I can think of where someone is voracious is John Simm’s Master in “The End of Time” because he’s running an energy deficit.  The 10th Doctor tells him what’s happening.

DOCTOR: Your resurrection went wrong. That energy. Your body's ripped open. Now you're killing yourself. 

Has the Master taken over the Doctor’s body?  It’s possible since the Doctor looked into the Eye of Harmony.

BTW, yet again we see another reference to the Doctor not sleeping, which is a reference to “Sleep No More” (and capitalism gone amok, which is a recurring theme).  Lack of sleep will drive him mad again.  And “Sleep’s for tortoises” is from the 4th Doctor story “The Talons of Weng-Chiang” where we see a Chinese magician in the services of a despot from the 51st century, who is posing as the Chinese god Weng-Chiang.  The despot drains life forces to stay alive similar to what happens in “Knock Knock.”

 Für Elise & Beethoven

When Nardole is leaving the Vault area, someone in the Vault first plays “Für Elise" (or "Fuer Elise”), a composition by Beethoven.  The title means “For Elise,” which is significant since Eliza is the landlord’s mother.

Beethoven is a reference to the Doctor and Bill.  In fact, the 12th Doctor has a bust of Beethoven (red arrow) in his office.

Is the Doctor inside the Vault?  The landlord is a mirror of the Doctor (which I’ll show you more in a few minutes), so maybe the Doctor is playing “Für Elise" for his Mother or Mother of God consciousness.

Anyway, the music stops Nardole in his tracks:

NARDOLE: A piano? You've put a piano in there? Why?

DOCTOR: Goodnight.

NARDOLE: (sighs) Oh, you don't learn, do you, sir.

Again, the Doctor is not learning whatever lesson Nardole thinks he should, which also doesn’t bode well for the future.

What would Nardole make of the next tune, “Pop Goes the Weasel”?

 “Pop Goes the Weasel”: Misdirection, The Prisoner Series & Classic Who

We get some important clues suggesting who is in the Vault.  I’ve seen a lot of people guessing Missy.  However, I don’t believe this is correct.  DW and Moffat love misdirection.  The person in the Vault does play an upbeat “Pop Goes the Weasel” when the Doctor mentions that children get eaten in the story of the haunted house, which does seem like a Missy thing to do.  However, the song has long ties to the early days of DW.  I’ll give you my best guess of who is in the Vault in a few minutes. 

“Pop Goes the Weasel,” an English nursery rhyme and singing game, is an important metaphor.  First of all, it refers to prisoners, mind control, and illusions, which have been driving DW for a long time.  These references show up in the 3rd Doctor and Sarah Jane episode “Planet of the Spiders,” as well as the iconic British TV series from the 1960s called The Prisoner.  Second, “Pop Goes the Weasel” is also a meme in The Prisoner, representing an acronym.  Third, a different metaphorical representation of the song title shows up in “Thin Ice.”

 The Prisoner, Interrogation Techniques & “Pop Goes the Weasel”

The Prisoner is a 17-episode iconic British television series from 1967, and it looks to me like many ideas in DW come from The Prisoner.  (I recommend it, and it has far-reaching influence beyond DW.)  The series is a psychological, allegorical, spy drama about a British former secret agent who resigns abruptly in anger.  Then, he is abducted and held in a prison disguised as a coastal, island resort, where his captors use psychological warfare, among other things, to try to find out why he abruptly resigns from his job.  At one point, he vows to escape, come back, and destroy the place.  He also forms revolts, which is very much like what is in the subtext of DW.  We also see that as well from the Doctor’s statements in “Smile” where Scottish settlements all over are demanding independence.

No names at this mysterious resort prison are used, only numbers for both inmates and warders, so it’s generally difficult to know who is a prisoner and who isn’t.  Our agent, who generally can’t trust anyone, is assigned Number Six.  However, he says he is not a number, but a person and a free man in the opening credits. In fact, throughout the series, he refuses to embrace this new identity and sticks to his individualism to the extreme frustration of his warders. 

The 12th Doctor seems very much like Number Six, defying the rules.  In Classic Who, the Doctor said he was only free if he did the bidding of the Time Lords, although he did like defying the Time Lords, especially the 4th Doctor.

Like the former agent, the Doctor doesn’t use his name.  In fact, what’s interesting is that we’ve become accustomed to assigning each Doctor a number in a similar way the agent and fellow inmates are assigned numbers. The 4th and 12th Doctors seem particularly defiant in many ways, like Number Six.

Six, BTW, in DW is an interesting number because we saw how Kahler Tek was actually Subject 6 at the academy.  Archive 6 holds the TARDIS on the game station.  Also, there are hexagons all over the inside of the TARDIS. 

Here’s River, shown below, in “The Husbands of River Song” opening her secret alcohol cabinet.  The hexagons make a honeycomb structure, which is typically an ancient symbol of immortality.  Every other column of hexagons has a circle inside.

We also see the 5 faces of the Doctor, shown below, in “Smile.”  Each one is in a hexagon.  Here, the Doctor may be a schizoid man.  One of the episodes of The Prisoner is “The Schizoid Man,” where Number Six has a duplicate, who tries to steal his identity and mess with his mind.

Interestingly, in The Prisoner episode “Once Upon a Time,” the main warder Number Two quotes Shakespeare’s "All the world's a stage" monologue from As You Like It,  “One man in his time plays many parts.”  The Doctor is playing many parts, especially the 12th Doctor.

 Mind Control, Dream Manipulation, Hallucinations & More

The idyllic-looking setting of the coastal resort conceals the sinister workings of the prison that breaks the spirits of the inmates to gather intel.  Most of the prisoners are brainwashed and become hollow versions of their former selves, succumbing to the collectivist attitude of the prison community.

Using a variety of techniques, the warders try to extract information from our former agent, including mind control, dream manipulation, hallucinogenic drugs, identity theft, physical coercion, and various forms of social indoctrination.  He’s too valuable, so his captors don’t use permanently damaging techniques, like with most of the other inmates.

One other thing that happens to Number Six is that his mind is transferred into someone else’s body for an episode.  This show has futuristic, sci-fi, and fairytale elements to it.  At one point, Number Six says, “Don’t tell me time travel is in it as well?”

In comparison, we’ve seen many of these techniques in the subtext of DW.

 “Pop Goes the Weasel” Meme in Episode “Once Upon a Time”

The melody of "Pop Goes the Weasel" shows up in several episodes of the The Prisoner. However, it’s particularly important in the penultimate episode "Once Upon a Time."  Number Six is under assault by intense mind control techniques that make him become childlike.  Then, when he undergoes interrogation, he obsessively sings "Pop Goes the Weasel" and says “Pop… Pop…Pop…” at times.  "POP" here is an acronym for the meme representing the directive "Protect Other People."

In DW, is the person in the Vault actually using the meme “Protect Other People”?  If the Doctor is inside, I would expect him to use this meme.

 “Pop Goes the Weasel”: “Planet of the Spiders” & “Turn Left”

In DW, “Pop Goes the Weasel,” to my knowledge, is first used in the 3rd Doctor episode with Sarah Jane Smith called “Planet of the Spiders.”  It’s actually the 3rd Doctor’s last episode.  Here’s yet another spider and Sarah Jane reference. It’s obvious that some of the things in “Turn Left” come from “Planet of the Spiders.”

According to the TARDIS Wikia:

The blue crystal that the Doctor took from Metebelis III in a previous adventure is desperately sought by the Eight Legs, a race of mutated spiders, as the final element in their plan for universal domination. With help from an old mentor, the Doctor realises the only way to foil the plot is to make the ultimate sacrifice. The Doctor must risk death to return to the cave of the Great One and save the universe.

Psychic Abilities

“Planet of the Spiders” initially takes place at a Buddhist meditation center where a group of men are secretly working on developing their psychic abilities, seeking power and one also seeks revenge.  The Doctor, meanwhile, is researching psycholotry, telepathy, and clairvoyance and enlists the aid of a clairvoyant.

Psychic powers feature prominently in this episode, like teleportation, psychokinesis, and physical manifestations.  The Doctor tells the clairvoyant, “Mister Clegg, your powers may seem to be extraordinary, but I assure you that they lie dormant in everyone. They're perfectly natural.”  Professor Clegg, who is independent of the meditation center and crystal, has the natural ability of psychokinesis, etc.  However, multiple people use the powers, especially with the help of the blue crystal the Doctor stole or with the aid of the spiders’ ability to join minds with the humans.

Here’s Sarah Jane with the queen spider on her back, shown below, along with the 3rd Doctor and his old mentor K’anpo Rimpoche.  The queen is usually only visible when she wants to be, and she is controlling Sarah Jane. The spiders have more control over their victims, than it seems the beetle has control over Donna in “Turn Left.” The queen ends up talking through Sarah Jane in a different voice.

K’anpo, a Time Lord living on Earth who is the abbot of the meditation center, has an assistant Cho Je. At one point the Doctor and Sarah Jane find out that K'anpo and Cho Je are the same person.  Cho Je experiences pain and seems real, but he is a projection of K'anpo.  In fact, when K’anpo dies, he regenerates into Cho Je.  This is the only time we see 2 Time Lords regenerate in one episode.

That a Time Lord can project a version of himself is another superpower, so to speak.  Is something like this happening with the Doctor?

 “Pop Goes the Weasel,” Giant Spider & Illusion

The Great One, a colossal spider (red arrow) who rules over the queen and the other spiders as a goddess, is shown below.  The tiny 3rd Doctor with white hair is at the bottom right of center in the foreground in the crystal cave.

The interesting thing about this image is that if we shrink it down, shown below, the spider area is an eye, which makes sense because the Great One sees much of what is going on. I see this as a representation that mirrors the Eye of Harmony.  The other spiders are in a big “C” shape in a room on Metebelis III.  This seems like the forerunner to the Eye of Harmony.  

However, along with the spidery Eye, the cave part behind the spider is odd.  In a way, the two bright spots near the top look like eyes, where the spider is the nose.  This is easier to visualize for me in the larger image.

The Doctor returns to Metebelis III from where he stole a blue crystal from the planet.  He didn’t realize he stole it at the time, although he did take it.  He goes to a cave and hears Sarah’s voice.

(The Doctor arrives in a cave lit with blue light.) SARAH [OC]: Quickly, Doctor! Quickly! GREAT ONE [OC]: Stop! If you come any further, Doctor, you will die. Oh, not at once, but gradually every cell in your body will be irretrievably damaged by the crystal rays, and I need you alive. DOCTOR: I heard the voice of my assistant? GREAT ONE [OC]: Have no fear. She is quite safe. DOCTOR: But she called out to me for help. GREAT ONE [OC]: Like this? SARAH [OC]: Doctor, help me! Come quickly! GREAT ONE [OC]: No! It is an illusion. Listen. SARAH [OC]: Half a pound of tuppenny rice, half a pound of treacle. That's the way the money goes. (Pop.) DOCTOR [OC]: Goes the weasel.

It’s interesting because “Pop Goes the Weasel” is used in an illusion with both Sarah’s and the Doctor’s voices being mimicked. 

In fact, the Great One has a lot of mind power and can easily control the Doctor, as she demonstrates, even though she is not on his back.

 “Pop Goes the Weasel,” Queen Spider, Mind Control & Superpowers

“Pop Goes the Weasel” shows up a second time in “Planet of the Spiders.”  Sarah and the Doctor escape the spiders’ prison after Sarah takes the Doctor's hands and concentrates before they both vanish.  Then, they reappear in a human village on Metebelis III, where the humans are under the spiders’ control.  The Doctor says

DOCTOR: Goes the weasel.

SARAH: What?

DOCTOR: How did you manage that?

SARAH: The Queen taught me. Nothing to it, really.

There is no “Pop” here when they materialize.  Unbeknownst to the Doctor, Sarah has the queen on her back.  A little later, the queen takes control of Sarah and demands the blue crystal, which is now in K’anpo’s hands.  Sarah even has the power to zap the Doctor with an energy bolt.

A short time later, Sarah is losing her identity.  The Doctor and K’anpo try to help her:

DOCTOR: Sarah, listen to me. Struggle against the spider, Sarah. Fight it!

QUEEN [OC]: I am the Queen.

K'ANPO: No. You are Sarah Jane Smith.

SARAH: I, I

K'ANPO: You are free. You don't have to be dominated. Look into your mind and see that you are free.

DOCTOR: Sarah, look at the crystal. Look at it! Look deep into its blue light.

QUEEN [OC]: No! No! I will not.

K'ANPO: See that you are free, now.

QUEEN [OC]: I am the Queen.

SARAH: No, I'm free. Free.

QUEEN [OC]: The Queen must live. Help me. I shall die.

SARAH: I'm frightened!

DOCTOR: Concentrate, Sarah! Concentrate!

K'ANPO: You are free!

(With a cry, the Queen falls from Sarah's back.)

SARAH: Doctor!

(Lying on her back, the Queen Spider's legs curl up and she vanishes.)

Sarah Volunteers & the Doctor Is Responsible for Everything

A short time later, we find out Sarah volunteered to have the queen take her over.  Caecilius in “The Fires of Pompeii” looks like he volunteered too with the beetle, and the subtext suggests that he did it for love.

SARAH: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Doctor.

DOCTOR: What have you got to be sorry about? You did very well. You should be proud of yourself.

SARAH: To let that creature take me over like that. I mean, I actually volunteered.

K'ANPO: We are all apt to surrender ourselves to domination. Even the strongest of us.

DOCTOR: Do you mean me?

K'ANPO: Not all spiders sit on the back.

SARAH: Oh, I don't understand. You're not saying they've taken over the Doctor, are you?

DOCTOR: Oh no, Sarah, no. No, he's talking about my greed.

SARAH: Greed? You?

DOCTOR: Yes, my greed for knowledge, for information. He's saying that all this is basically my fault. If I hadn't taken the crystal in the first place. I know who you are now.

K'ANPO: You were always a little slow on the uptake, my boy.

DOCTOR: It's been a long, long time.

SARAH: You know each other?

DOCTOR: Oh, yes. Yes, he was my teacher. My, my guru, if you like. In another time, another place.

K'ANPO: Another life.

SARAH: Oh, no. Don't tell me you're a Time Lord too?

K'ANPO: I am. But the discipline they serve was not for me.

DOCTOR: No. Nor for me.

K'ANPO: I wouldn't have chosen your alternative. To borrow a Tardis was a little naughty, to say the least.

BTW, the word “naughty” comes up a couple of times in this episode.  Interestingly, in “Thin Ice” Nardole calls the 12th Doctor naughty for leaving in the TARDIS with Bill.

The 3rd Doctor has to fix his mistake and take the crystal back to the cave, which destroys the Great One, but the Doctor’s cells are damaged.  He regenerates back on Earth.

 “Pop Goes the Weasel” & “Thin Ice”

The lyrics to “Pop Goes the Weasel” are rather obscure, and they have been attributed to several possible things.  One of them is a spinner’s weasel, which shows up in “Thin Ice.”

According to Wikipedia:

A spinner's weasel consists of a wheel which is revolved by the spinner in order to measure off thread or yarn after it has been produced on the spinning wheel. The weasel is usually built so that the circumference is six feet, so that 40 revolutions produces 80 yards of yarn, which is a skein. It has wooden gears inside and a cam, designed to cause a popping sound after the 40th revolution, telling the spinner that she has completed the skein.

After the Doctor punches Sutcliffe, a couple of Sutcliffe’s men take Bill and the Doctor to a Frost Fair tent on the Thames.  In the image below, before they get out of the carriage, we see the tent with a spinning wheel (red arrow) outside of it.  The wheel shows up in several scenes, although not prominently like this.  No one ever uses it.

Therefore, “Pop Goes the Weasel” most likely means more than being happy that children get eaten. Interestingly, in “Thin Ice,” Bill and the Doctor free Loch-less, who may turn around and eat people.  She doesn’t that we know of.

However, not freeing Loch-less means many more people will die anyway and the cycle will continue. Before they leave this tent, the Doctor tells Bill:

DOCTOR: I'll take care of this. You get everyone off the ice.

The Doctor’s directive to Bill is essentially POP, Protect Other People.

By the way, everyone on the ice represents prisoners because there are chains all around the area. The stairs have chains (red arrow), as seen in the image below.  People are ascending to freedom.  Essentially, freeing the people at the Frost Fair is akin to freeing the people trapped in the Library computer.

Moments before, we see Sutcliffe looking at his watch.  He, too, is a prisoner, as shown by the chain (red arrow).

At the Frost Fair, besides the POP acronym, “Pop Goes the Weasel” seems to represent the illusion of fun and happiness, until you get eaten or realize another creature has been suffering for generations.  It can also refer to an illusion that people are safe on the ice, unaware of the danger around them until the last minute.  This mirrors how Donna thought she was safe in the Library dream until the last minute, even though the Library was going to self-destruct.

 It’s Time to Pay: The Empty Child Plague & Being Immune

In so many ways, “Knock Knock” is the embodiment of what we’ve been examining in the subtext.  It foreshadows what will happen with the Doctor.   There’s the Empty Child-type plague (space wood lice killing, eating, or changing people into something).  Also, there’s a child who needs his mother.  This time a little boy unwittingly saves his mother, Eliza, with space wood lice.  From there, it seems natural that the little boy would want to keep his mother alive.  In fact, he has trapped himself in a terrible dilemma.  Kill others or let his mother die.  The loving child would always choose his mother over other people’s lives.

The landlord, a child who never grew up normally, is still a vulnerable child inside.  The creepy, sinister landlord persona gives way to a heartbreaking scene.  It’s a twist from “Are you my mummy?”  Instead, we get “My son?” since it’s the mother who has forgotten who her child is. Once the mother and son embrace, in what is equivalent to an alchemical marriage, the plague stops, as mother and son succumb to seemingly the same fate as those eaten.  Then, in horror-film fashion, the house falls in.

Once again, we have a Star Whale metaphor, where the house and space lice are mirrors.  This reference is the first indirect Star Whale reference to the Doctor that we’ve seen over the past 9 episodes.  Even in “The Husbands of River Song,” where Hydroflax is the Star Whale metaphor, the Doctor says his back is playing up from the weight of a monarchy, “an entirely pointless stratum of society….”  While less direct, it’s still the Doctor admitting he’s tired of being the Star Whale metaphor.

 Paying Dues & The Landlord: A Dark Mirror

The Doctor & Landlord Similarities

There are a lot of similarities between the Doctor and the landlord, as well as his house. 

(1) The landlord has “lord” in his title.  The Doctor actually tells Bill he is a Time Lord.

(2) Both men knock on the wood.  The landlord knocks on the wood after he hears the students’ complaints and says, “You understand I won't be able to do any of this tonight. But as soon as possible, yes.”  He oddly knocks on the wood paneling and then adds, “Knock on wood.”  In comparison, the Doctor knocks on the wood when he’s talking to Bill.  He doesn’t look too convinced, though, of his answer.  I take it as a warning to Bill:

BILL: You're not leaving, are you?

DOCTOR: No. Your friend will probably be fine. (knocks on a panel) Knock on wood.

(3) Both the landlord and Doctor show up unexpectedly.  The landlord shows up multiple times, seeming to pop in.  How did he get into the house when it sealed itself?  The Doctor, too, shows up once unexpectedly in what appears to be a cupboard.  Later, we find out it’s an elevator. 

There is a visual reference of appearing and disappearing too.  When Shireen opens the front door to ask the landlord about the washing machine, we see a lit TARDIS, instead of the landlord.  This is a classic storytelling technique that suggests the person who is the object of the search is actually connected to the object viewed.

(4) The landlord is not a whole person.  He’s stuck in the past, needing his mother.  Similarly, the Doctor is stuck in the past, as he is a Sun, lacking integration with his Mother of God Consciousness, so he is not complete. 

(5) Both are connected to paintings of people.  We see what I’m going to call a portrait to easily distinguish it from similar terminology (although usually a portrait pertains to only a head and shoulders). The landlord’s mother’s portrait is sitting on the floor, shown below.

We also see a portrait of multiple people near the Vault.  If we apply the same metaphor, it should be the Doctor’s family.  And it looks like there are at least 2 people in the portrait.

(6) The landlord is causing people to be eaten through a plague-like infestation of space wood lice. In comparison, being a Sun, the Doctor is spreading a plague that kills people (or eats people, referring to the Star Whale, like the landlord’s house eats people).  

 The Landlord Is a Mirror

Obviously, from all of this, the landlord is a mirror.  However, is he really evil or just a damaged child who never grew up?  At first he seems creepy and sinister.  However, because of the ending, I can’t call him evil. It is a heartbreaking story where the landlord is truly damaged and misguided.  It’s not surprising that he is not supposed to be evil in the end. After all, this story references another theme for the season where someone or something is neither good nor evil, which fits the landlord.

When faced with the same situation, how many children would choose their mother’s life over the death of others?  It’s a similar problem to what we already have seen in “A Christmas Carol,” where Kazran has to choose the day Abigail dies, or the Doctor with the day that River dies.  The landlord would have to choose the day his mother dies, too.

 What is this leading up to?

This may be leading to the coming day that Clara has to die again, meaning she has to go back to Gallifrey and submit to her death.

 It’s Time to Pay: Not an Exception

It’s so interesting that the landlord says

LANDLORD: We must all pay our dues.

BILL: But not you?

LANDLORD: Correct. I am the exception.

(He taps the panelling.)

LANDLORD: For I am your landlord.

I find this so fascinating because this is exactly what we were examining in the chapter on “Thin Ice.” The Doctor doesn’t incur long-term damage in canon.  Like the landlord, the Doctor is the exception.  

However, because the landlord didn’t, in the end, have immunity and we’re coming down to the truth, these occurrences tell us that the Doctor will most likely incur some type of damage or severe consequences over more than one episode.  He will not be immune. Bill’s life looks like it’s in peril in the upcoming “Oxygen” episode in a way we haven’t seen with a companion.  (I’m not counting a quick death.)  Does the Doctor become injured when he tries to save Bill?

 Moving On

DW has made a big deal of the Doctor moving on in “Thin Ice” and “Knock Knock.”  However, it seems DW has over done it in “Knock Knock.”  The Doctor seems rather callous at the end of “Knock Knock” with the students and even Nardole. 

But which face of the 12th Doctor are we seeing?  Are we even seeing the 12th Doctor in control?  It looks like it, but the Doctor is showing us a different face again, so DW wants us to see that something is different or even wrong. 

Regardless, I believe DW is trying to make a not-so-subtle point that the Doctor is fooling himself again. It doesn’t look like the Doctor will be able to just move on from the upcoming episode.  Redemption for him, as we’ve examined, will be expensive.

I continue to believe many of the events we are seeing show elements of the backstory of the 1st Doctor.  The Trickster may be involved in a contract with the Doctor, who possibly as a child tried to save his Mother.  This would be DW’s version of Doctor Faustus.  We know she was lost a long time ago.

 The Needs of the Many Vs. the Few, Or the One

Weighing one life against the lives of the many, or the few, or even the one like Clara, has been a recurring theme, especially for the 12th Doctor. We see it again in “Knock Knock” with the landlord choosing one life over many, like the Doctor did in “Hell Bent.”

However, Eliza chooses to protect other people by giving up her life and her son’s.

In “Thin Ice,” the Doctor made a great speech:

DOCTOR: Human progress isn't measured by industry, it's measured by the value you place on a life. An unimportant life. A life without privilege. The boy who died on the river, that boy's value is your value. That's what defines an age. That's what defines a species.

Can he uphold that in whatever is coming his way?  What about Clara?

Who is in the Vault?

It could be Missy, but the Master seems more likely than her. However, my best guess is that it’s the Doctor because of the Beethoven reference, which can also mean time travel.  Also, “Pop Goes the Weasel” seems more likely to be a directive to protect other people.

Is there a stasis field inside the Vault?  Or a regeneration field?  Like there was in the Pandorica?  Both Amy and the Doctor needed that in “The Big Bang.”