#not to make myself a mary sue but like just think about it i MADE all of them i wrote all of their stories i control every single thing

[fuckingfandomfreak]

lots of complaining underneath sorry I couldn’t fit everything in the tags like usual

I am genuinely convinced that so many Merthur shippers actually ship Arwen but identify more with Merlin, so they just recreate Arwen’s dynamic (simp, over-protective Arthur and I-can-take-care-of-myself!, always-right!, actual-saint! girlboss) and give it to Merthur. Reasons for this are racism (obviously), the fact that early seasons merlin likes to read (scholarly books on magic not a fucking romantasy mind you), early seasons Merlin being 12 lbs, and the fact that Merlin has magic (cool powers, gay allegory, and is oppressed). Other reasons, too, but these I think really contribute to people directly projecting onto him like they do Morgana. I think this makes people feel personally victimized when Arthur does anything to Merlin bc he’s blond jock and Merlin is bookish, sassy nerd.

But fanon merlin is nothing like actual merlin. Merlin is a MAN; he’s just as arrogant as every other MAN. He’s a bit of a fucking lit bro that thinks he’s underappreciated bc he’s into important, valuable things instead of sports (for idiots). He canonically an genius and he’s many times insufferably arrogant, too.

But only Arthur needs to fix his arrogant bc Arthur’s arrogance is jock bro, so it’s more immediately recognizable and disliked. Even tho, I don’t actually find Arthur that arrogant, or i just can’t forget that most of Arthur’s arrogance is a front for insecurity. He’s only sincerely arrogant about sword fighting (which I don’t mind bc he’s literally the best swordsman in the kingdom and it’s not bragging if it’s true) and little presumptuous bc he’s a wealthy royal.

But this is a long winded way to say that some Merlin fanfics feel like weird revenge fantasies (romantasies??? but not in the book genre way) of nerdy girls with their high school football players mixed with a little class anger (but in the most insincere way bc morgana is never criticized for being rich bc she’s mostly portrayed as a gay white woman, and people don’t understand, or don’t want to address, intersectionality).

Which means Merlin’s actions don’t get judged, but do get examined and then excused, until they are in relation to Morgana. Bc Morgana is ACTUALLY skinny, oppressed, gay allegory, cool powers, always right, sassy, genius, sword fighting, resistance fighter white girl that constantly wins every argument she has with Arthur and makes him look like an idiot. That’s why she gets way more forgiveness and grace than Arthur even tho she is a 1000x worse person. It’s also why she and Merlin are usually besties (especially over him and Gwen) even tho they canonically have a very big political fallout.

Even with the Lamia episode. I have seen so much discourse (and a good amount of fics) that criminalizes the knights (jocks) for their treatment of Merlin (and sometimes Gwen) with people wanting them to prostrate themselves in guilt and then get put into the infirmary by Arthur for daring to hurt Merlin when they were LITERALLY ENCHANTED. Obviously, they themselves would feel guilty, but that doesn’t mean they SHOULD. And Merlin is not fucking lectured or made to apologize when he is enchanted to, and attempts to, KILL Arthur. Like, yeah, okay, the knights grabbed him and were mean to him, but Merlin’s a grown fucking man, the most powerful sorcerer, and, by now, literally physically bigger than both Gwaine and Elyan. He’s fine.

I thank god everyday that Arthur wasn’t there during that fucking episode. Every fucking merthur fanfic would’ve been insufferable.

I will never forgive fandom how unfair it is about Arthur

Dark Merlin It's usually good angst. You know, Merlin had had enough. Dark Arthur? Arthur is a fucking rapist, a monster.

Merlin guilty? Merlin feeling guilty and comforted by the entire cast. Arthur guilty? Arthur doing the worst things possible and someone razing him to the ground

Merlin always gets these nice things. always flowers, courtship, everything. Found family? Everyone comforts Merlin because big bad Arthur. (literally almost every Merlin "found family" is everyone loves Merlin and treats Arthur like shit)

Merlin gets an apology. Arthur? My parents will love me faster than someone will apologize to Arthur in fanfiction.

"suicidal, self-harming Merlin" but Arthur has no right to have mental problems (a whole lot of people have wanted him dead since he was born)

Protectivr knights? Always about Merlin.

Even the fucking omegaverse. Alpha Merlin is a nice calm creature who pretends to be a beta. Alpha Arthur... wild animal, keep Merlin in a cage.

No. Just no.

(forever grateful to those stupid British people that arthur never told merlin he was fat. because the fandom understands that something is a comedy if merlin says it. if arthur it would be ,,abuse")

[smaller-comfort]

For the blorbo ask: Let's go with Resh'an and ohhh, give me your thoughts on Sephiroth. As for which questions: 1, 6, 7, 13, 14, and 24.

1. who’s the Blorbo that you’ve never posted about on your blog?

I'm trying to think if there's any secret deep lore blorbo to unlock here, but I do periodically froth at the mouth about the Imperial Radch and Locked Tomb characters that I love. There's the Active Blorbo Roster and then there's all the characters sittin' on the bench in reserve, right?

And there are a lot of those- all the part 5 JJBA kids, Shanks from One Piece, Hakkai from Saiyuki, Mustadio FFTactics.

6. if you could talk to your Blorbo, what would you say to them?

I used to do a lot of 'interview the character' writing exercises when I was younger, but it's not really something that jives with my brain these days. So the boring answer is, I wouldn't say anything. I'm a bad conversationalist.

The *funny* answer- okay, so you remember the era of geocities websites with goofy "under construction" gifs and entire pages dedicated to script-style interactions between the site owner and their favorite characters, right. I had one of those. It was where I posted my multichaptered mary sue self insert oc/Sephiroth fanfic. I cannot for the life of me remember what it was called- no, wait, fuck, the title was "To Shed a Tear" holy shit I wish I hadn't remembered that-the oc was Rufus' sister and a member of the Turks, and look, it was 1998, I had to teach myself html somehow-

Uh. Anyway. So, ultimately, I would probably be apologizing to Sephiroth for all of that, and then maybe just asking for a swift death or something, idk.

I'd have nothing to say to Resh'an because in the ARG he's explicitly stated that he doesn't want to talk about his personal life with the rest of us, and I would attempt tobrespect that boundary. (Really, most of what I might say would probably get me banned from the Sabotage discord.) (I'd probably have to apologize to him for all the fanfic, too. *cough*)

7. what’s the one thing the fandom gets wrong about your Blorbo?

Sephiroth was not involved in some kind of well adjusted five person SOLDIER polycule pileup before the Nibelheim incident. That man has never looked at another human being and experienced a sexual thought in his *life*.

(This does not prevent him from walking Zack on a leash when the occasion calls for it, but like. That's just being a responsible friend. Sometimes Angeal is busy.)

I'm open to a lot of different interpretations of Resh'an right now- the fandom is so small, I'll take whatever I can get and be happy about it, honestly. I'm sure there are people who think *I'm* the one getting him wrong, though, and on some level this idea pleases me in the blackened, contrarian corners of my soul. Sorry, I've taken your mysterious mentor character with a tragic past and turned him into a sopping wet rag with erectile dysfunction. (I'm not that sorry.) (technically it's not ED it's anorgasmia *is shot*)

13. is there any crime, any wrongdoing your Blorbo could commit that would make you stop loving them and remove them from your hyperfixation entirely?

me, sitting on the front porch, sipping a shitty cocktail while watching Meteor about to obliterate the solar system: ...nah.

This kind of gets into like...Doylist/Watsonian characterization, right? The character is just going to do what they're written to do. So is there anything Square Enix could do to make Sephiroth stop being my blorbo? I guess they already did Crisis Core so like...It really doesn't get much worse than that. (I say this, but I haven't finished Rebirth! I am only vaguely aware of the major plot divergence stuff.)

All that said...Squeenix can't take the OG away from me. I'm stuck with the general background radiation of the Compilation, but the things that made me love the game, and the experience of playing it as a child, are always going to be mine. My particular take on Sephiroth exists largely independent of canon and the current fandom at this point.

For Resh'an- let him war criminal even harder! XD

Really, though, I'm steeling myself for inevitable disappointment around his canon backstory and the ultimate resolution of the story. This is not meant to be any shade on Thierry Boulanger's storytelling skills- but being part of the fandom for an ongoing story is always a unique experience, and it tends to leave you with complicated feelings towards the actual conclusion of the story, no matter how good it ends up being.

But if he and Aephorul turn out to be stereotypical anime rivals pre-immortality, I will be *extremely* annoyed (I say, as I write them constantly bickering and antagonizing each other). But I don't think that would even be a deal breaker for me at this point.

14. have you ever distanced yourself from your Blorbo / have you ever left a fandom because people in the fandom were being too toxic?

Maybe back when I was more active in fandom in general? My memory is too fucky to answer this properly, I think; I know there absolutely were people in AC fandom who made me want to eat paint, but I don't think they were why I left. Most of the time when I leave a fandom, it's because I get bored or lose interest or fall into a depression hole for half a decade. (The depression hole is what makes this hard to answer. From 2018-2023 I wasn't on tumblr or fannish twitter and I wasn't really reading fanfic or "doing fandom" at all.)

I've left/avoided certain fandoms because of non-fandom interpersonal blow ups with specific people- I've had several friend groups explode messily over the years, and avoiding some of those people meant avoiding fandoms we used to share. (FFVII was briefly, tangentially one of those for me back in 2009.)

Now, I'm more likely to distance myself from a fandom if I find it annoying, honestly. I spent like ten minutes in the In Stars and Time tag and very quickly determined that it was Not For Me, and that's totally fine! It's a perfectly lively fandom, it's just not my thing. Same with Baldur's Gate and Arcane (and to a lesser extent TLT); I just get the curated content from my lovely mutuals, and if there's anything else going on, I pretend I do not see it.

24 if you could change one canonical thing about your Blorbo, what would it be?

Lemme just- *slam dunks Genesis Rhapsodos into the trash* And look! Nothing of value was lost. Nothing changes in the story that needed to be changed. The tragedy still unfolds, and it's 50% less idiotic! Angeal can stay. He's fine.

Maybe they've fixed the idiocy in Rebirth. I doubt it, though. Sephiroth's appeal initially comes partly from him being a bit of a blank slate- the players get a very limited window into who he is and what his whole deal is, and that vast *potential* is where some of the best (most unhinged) fanworks develop. The OG is very deliberate about how it treats Sephiroth as a villain- he's literally the shark from Jaws, hovering under the narrative. Twenty five years later he's one of the most recognizable video game villains in the world, so I understand *why* Remake went a different direction. But it's still a little disappointing. Sometimes leaving things vague and mysterious is good, actually!

Anyway, other than setting Genesis on fire- I don't know. Put him in one of those slutty turtlenecks with the boob window. It's what we deserve. (The serious answer- sort of- make him 2000% more body horror about the Jenova cells. Give him tentacles to go with the fucking angel wings.)

As for Resh'an- we've got three more games to go. He's sitting firmly in that sweet spot of unhinged potential; we don't know enough about his backstory yet for me to want it changed. So, really, the only change I'd make at this juncture would probably be to give the Great Eagle more tail feathers. It just *bothers* me, okay. Why are there only three.

[anonmousegosqueak]

Okokokok. So I’m nonbinary (she/they, afab) and I tend to switch presenting masc or femme fairly often. So what about Poly or platonic 141 and reader or oc who is similar? Like with a she/they who presents both ways but leans towards masc?

If you’re not comfy with it that’s fine! No worries if you don’t write it. Just thought I’d send a little potential inspo your way ☺️ have a nice evening

Spaghetti. I'm literally the same, if I were to write about an OC it would just be my super cool awesome self insert who everyone loves and has fifty billion boyfriends and they all smoke weed. Specifically self insert- as I am also they/she and tend to switch between masc and fem presenting.

But while I love and cherish that oc, I also understand that not everyone wants to see that. I made them for myself, not to plague the online with "Mary Sue" or whatever.

Anyways- I guess poly!141 x reader? I'm still not sure how to title stuff sooo~ I'm also gonna be smart and put a cut in now because I *know* I'ma get carried away and write till my fingers break.

Gonna break this up into individual reactions/responses (dw it's nothing but fluff)

Okay let's start with the boomer who isn't actually that old (38 is not old...) but it's funny to pretend he is:

Surprisingly enough, Price not only understands, he 100% hypes you up. He tends to default to they/them pronouns but will (if you're okay with it) absolutely call you "one of his boys" masc or fem. After his shithead father was... Him. Price kinda took it upon himself to be a good mentor to y'all, especially if your own dad isn't great- or even if he's fine tbh, this guy snatched up Kyle despite him (in my hc) having an alright dad. So yeah, he may or may not teach you 'man-ly stuff'.

For example: date night to the club. You want to dress more masculine?

Price: "Luv- are you planning on wearing that? Borrowing one of Simon's shirts? No doll, here take one of mine. It brings out your eyes~"

The shit in question is the most old-man flannel you could imagine, like sir- w h y.

Granted, it does look pretty good on you...

Date at the club, looking more fem?

Price: "Stunning as always- pretty thing. I think this necklace would pair well."

To be fair, he'd think you'd look beautiful in anything (or nothing).

Would absolutely buy you a binder if you want, he makes sure you practice safe binding as well. Wouldn't want his wonderful partner to break a rib! That's Johnny's thing.

Listen, Price may or may not have dabbled in some drag when he was younger. While it's not the same, he understands presenting in a way different from your gender identity. He always loves when he can use she/her pronouns while you look masc af, it makes him do that ugly quokka smile he does.

Besides, you'll always be his lovely partner no matter gender or presentation.

Little kitty meow meow sunshine baby boy princess:

Ghost is... Well okay- does he understand? Not really. Does he care? Also no. As long as you're happy, he'll do whatever the hell you want him to. Something as simple as using whatever pronouns no matter how you dress? Bro, he's used to shooting people for his partner, this is nothing. Mate does not give a heck about SAAB, presentation, or identity. Just tell him what to do and he'll do it.

Tell him you prefer she/they pronouns? Okay luv. Tell him you wanna take his shirt because you want to dress masculine and you think the oversized look would be cute? Alright, here you go. (You meant one of the ones from his closest, not what he was wearing but okay)

Bro would care more if you microwaved tea than whatever gender stuff makes you comfortable.

Also- 100% would knock the lights out of anyone who tried to disrespect you. He's already punching homophobes, why not add transphobes to the list?

This one is the shortest because he really does not care. As long as you're happy, he's happy. He might not go out of his way to support you, more because he doesn't know how than because he doesn't care (in a rude way). Similar to his sexuality (check out my post :3 about 141 sexualities), he doesn't fully understand terms or even the actual definitions, he just knows he likes you and you like being called certain things and dressing certain ways.

MEN 13IN1 Shampoo Conditioner Body Wash Toothpaste Mouthwash Deodorant Peanut Butter Gatorade Milk Tin Foil Tennis Shoes Dental Floss Eye Drops:

Bro- Soap is literally so gay

But nah, again referencing my earlier post- Soap doesn't give a heck what your gender is, he's gonna hit that no matter what. He's also got a bit of a foggy view of his own gender, often dressing however he wants masc or fem.

Y'all are trading clothes, no questions asked.

He's much more likely to talk about it, making jokes and such. Whereas Simon quietly accepts you, Soap is a lot more vocal about it. He thinks a good date is heading to a pride parade, he's 100% right.

Sometimes he will get it wrong, calling you the wrong pronouns or something, but you better believe he'll be begging on his knees for forgiveness. Just a silly guy. He loves you, no matter shape or size or presentation or identity.

Soap: "Oi- Bonnie! Can I wear your skirt?"

That's right, you won't be taking his clothes but he'll be taking yours. Well... You could wear his clothes but you won't be wearing them for long. He gets excited at the very idea. One time you put on a random hoodie, not seeing the hole MACTAVISH on the back, and within ten minutes of seeing you he was holding you up like a trophy and showing you off.

Soap: "Lookit my pretty lass! They can wear a skirt or a suit and look absolutely stunning!"

So yeah, like a puppy in a pride bandana.

hghhhhhnnnn... Must bite hussbannnd...

Uh- Gaz. Yeah. Mhm. Please ignore that, my inner demons wanted a word in.

I think he's a perfect mix of Johnny and Simon. Very supportive, but also much more chill. He's also the most likely to ask you questions, like 'what pronouns do you want me to use?' and 'are you okay if I call you baby?' and 'i noticed your wearing a lot more masculine clothes, do you wanna go shopping for more?'. He's a firm believer in communication, no matter what.

He's also a certified pretty boy™, if you match outfits with him he will literally get down on one knee right there.

He's also particularly fond of complementing you no matter what. You could be fresh out of bed and not even properly dressed yet, he'll be saying you're the hottest thing he's ever seen. Masculine, feminine, he thinks you're amazing.

He also likes making outfits with you. Please tell him if you wanna dress up today, he'll be right next to you looking through clothes and asking you what you wanna wear.

Idk man, he wants nothing more than for you to be happy and would do anything to make sure you're comfortable in your skin.

Uhh- I may have lost track of what the og ask was, I got distracted thinking about how heckin adorable these guys are. Tldr: peg them.

Okay bye <3

[starboishifting]

Omg i have a shadowhunter dr too! Can u talk more abt it👻👻👻

aaaa hi!! yes, i'd love to!~

𓅓‧₊˚ ִ☾. || sʜᴀᴅᴏᴡʜᴜɴᴛᴇʀs ᴅ/ʀ ɪɴᴛʀᴏ

so it's not the most creative d/r i have, if i'm being completely frank- i just made myself clary with some notable differences.

for starters, it's based on the show, not the books (i know, i'm sorry, i like it, sue me). however, the key differences are as follows~

simon and magnus' face claims are from the movie (my face claim is also different, but it's one i found myself)

i don't lose my memory at 'the end'; jace and the rest make a deal with the angels (which of course we break but what are they gonna do about it, ya know?)

jace and i don't live in the institute~ we have our own apartment in manhatten and i get to paintas much as i like whenever i like

i did the math? the show takes place over about a 6 month period not including the year after when clary has no memory. i want it to take a bit longer because we love filler episodes

lydia is gay.

i speak a ton of languages because i needed to mary sue myself (it was one of my first d/rs)

my special weapons are balisongs, not anything boring like my parent's swords (blegh)

I TAKE OVER SOME OF JACE'S SHIT BECAUSE HOLY FUCK HE WENT THROUGH SO MUCH TRAUMA AND I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND HE DOES NOT DESERVE THAT AT ALL AAAAA

there's background music and no one questions it. i love ruelle too much for my own good. that show had an incredible sounndtrack and i am not losing that for the sake of 'realism'. i'm fighting fucking demons literally every day. why can i not have a cool song playing?

i think i also changed it to take place more in 2020-ish because i would like to not wear 2016core to kill my first demon/meet the love of my life, thank you very much

thank you for the ask, i so loved answering it <3

[wings-of-fire-confessions]

I used to looooathe Glory. I thought her bad mood and constant sass was really annoying; however, I came to realize how a lot of her behavior stems from her abuse. Since then, she has become waaaay more of an interesting character to me.

Kestrel and the other guardians (but mostly Kestrel) always berating her and making her feel useless is probably why she started off as so snappy and pessimistic. She didn't see much of a point in trying to be better because nothing she ever did was good enough to them.

She doesn't show her emotions because crying or getting angry would've made her vulnerable to further abuse from the guardians. Some people find it strange that Glory doesn't seem shaken after using her venom on someone, but with this in mind, I think her cold attitude makes sense. She buries her feelings deep down (she doesn't even like to let her emotions slip through her scale color).

I doooo have to admit that it's little irritating to me that ever since the first arc, pretty much every dragon that isn't a villain automatically adores her? I guess dragons like Snowfall are initially skeptical of her, but they come to admire her pretty quickly. Of course!! It's great that she's finally getting appreciation after a childhood of neglect, but it just feels a bit forced to me.

I also think she becomes a little bland after the first arc, but I think that's because we don't get things from her POV anymore and generally just isn't that involved. As I said before, Glory tends to keep her thoughts to herself. Plus, she's learning the ropes of being a queen, so she's probably trying to be more mature.

Contrary to what a good chunk of the fandom believes (and what I used to believe), Glory definitely isn't a "Mary Sue." Yes, she achieves a LOT, but she is still flawed. Honestly, I think that term is often used just to be sexist :/ But that's a whole different debate.

This is a pretty shallow analysis; Glory is a surprisingly complex character (so are the other DoD tbh). But I don't have the energy to do a deep dive right now 🥲 So yeah. You can still dislike Glory (even with all of that said, I myself still feel kind of neutral about her), but don't brush her off as OP or a Mary Sue or whatever.

.

[thisoldplacehasmoved]

I think growing up with the peak of "furry/feminist/therian/animation meme cringe compilation" along with the entire art community making fun of mary sues and sparkle dogs and basically anyone who was a little kid with fun and whimsey really fucked with me putting myself out to the public and sharing my ocs and art. I feel like because I would watch those videos constantly, not even because I thought they were "cringe" but because I looked up to everyone in those videos so much for being able to be themselves, made me more scared to be open about myself. I've been terrified to post my art until a few months ago because I was terrified of being plastered all over the internet for being a "weird" beginner furry artist, I'm less scared of that now because I know to avoid instagram, tiktok, and twitter since those places are ruthless but I still can't bring myself to share anything about my ocs because of seeing what happened to people during those times.

I remember when I was maybe around 7 or 8 I learned about therians for the first time through those "cringe" compilations and I thought the beings in those videos were the coolest creatures I have ever seen, I wanted to be just like them and be so open about being a thing but because I was surrounded by all the hate in those videos as well it made me want to hide further from being perceived by anyone. But I still think about all of the wolves I used to see showing their shifts, making videos with their packs, doing quads and vocals, etcetcetc and I'll always look up to them for being themselves. I want to thank everyone in this community for being yourselves and being so welcoming, I want you to know how much you help others 💚

[wisteriasymphony]

I have a feeling that you secretly hate this show and all the writing choices . I just do .

I mean, without this show we wouldn't have the fandom, ergo I wouldn't be able to mess around with the characters and put them in situations, so... no?

My opinions on the show are untraceable and entirely irrelevant, and I tend to agree on a take-to-take basis with people on all sides of the fandom. Were there some things that could've been done differently? Yes of course. But Miraculous is what it is and if it were something Emmy-worthy, I don't know if I'd be so enthralled with it as I am.

Think of it like this:

Most people in the fandom play with the ideas in mlb like Barbie dolls. You dress them up, take them through soap opera plots and (as the wonderful asukiess so eloquently put it) cocomelon tragedies where they're all screaming and crying and kissing and you have a grand old time with it.

What I have been doing, over here in my own little world divorced from reason and sense, is chewing on all of the Barbie dolls' hands, cramming their heads in jars of finger paint, and scribbling on the walls. (And occasionally, just occasionally... my unpredictable scribblings will form a coherent word or thought that might even be approaching something profound about... the human condition or struggles with self-actualization or whatnot. But it's not a guarantee.)

Can you say the latter really... 'hates' the dolls? Hates the way they were made? No. To hate the dolls is to refuse to engage with them altogether, or to make YouTube Essays treating the Barbie dolls like real people with real culpability for their actions and calling them Mary Sues. That's not what I'm doing, not by a long shot.

It's also worth mentioning that a lot of what I do would be lost without the context of the show itself and its decisions.

- Kuro Neko was the catalyst in why I started writing TWEOS, and a lot of the impact of how characters act in that is because you need the prior context of both the show and the fandom to back it up.

- Adrien Agreste as Byronic Hero has much less weight to it unless you're used to seeing a version of him that is so clearly not that. The lovesquare in that fic absolutely falling apart by every conceivable metric—down to things as minuscule as Marinette the baker's daughter pursuing Adrien who secretly hates the taste of sweets—feels like less of a betrayal if you haven't seen the way they are supposed to be.

- Adrien and Marinette being presented as a cruel inevitability of a universe that does not care what they have to say in the matter... in because in 37,847 universes and counting, they will be together. In canon, they must be together.

tl;dr Maybe I'm dodging the question, and maybe my actions in changing so much about how the characters act/the world works in my fic speaks louder than my words... But I can't bring myself to hate this show. Percussive maintenance is still maintenance.

[kwassants]

Writers yap May 1, 2025

Thought I'd write about TSS again!

In case some of you are wondering: what creative choices I made about it, etc: Mild Spoilers Ahead (v mild idt there are actual spoilers in here tbh)

"I'm manhwa only and I'm craaaving more of Ludger's hilarious internal monologue and snarky remarks. I also wanted him to do more teaching because his school interactions made me happiest. I also wanted to challenge myself: can I make a romance for a character like him? It never felt right to me for the AUP canon to have romance, and I thought about what kind of enigma she'd have to be to match Ludger equally. What kind of character interactions would they have? What about their character arcs? How do I make it realistic? How do I make it enjoyable for people?

Anyway, I ramble because I got excited over writing this. I plan on writing more chapters."

Tags: ROMANCE, Comedy, Fluff, Smut (very consensual, very healthy)

Okay first of all let me get this out of the way: the plot was non-existent at first it was supposed to be episodic aka a colelction of oneshots that had a slow moving plot.

The first few episodes was for Ludger simping cause I thought, oh, it might make them stick around enough to like my OC LMAO cause I didn't know if people would like her at the time.

And I originally planned this to be like 25 chapters max.

(I am currently writing 60 and I don't think we're halfway yet) THE PLOT HAS EXPANDED.

Like… there is a whole ton of worldbuilding???

Some creative choices:

I decided to make them friends from the start of the fic, and have them start as liking each other already (flirting. Ik, might be weird for some to imagine) and then the backstory comes later (otherwise it'd be boring???) but yeah it'll eventually get revealed.

There is a whole chapter 1 dedicated to why i wrote the work lol that was the initial thesis which is an expanded version of what I said about the fic above.

It was supposed to be slice of life but then my brain really latched on to the idea of "I made this fic because I really want Ludger to heal from trauma but if I just made him go to therapy then I'd have no plot" and Ludger is NOT emotionally intelligent enough to like find his healing via found family imo, so I think there needs to be an external force aka another person who is more emotionally intelligent to make the pairing work.

I deliberately decided to make the FL have trauma too — because I'm really passionate about writing character-centric stories and I wanted to respect the entire healing process like healing isn't linear, and I wanted to focus on really making a healthy relationship BECAUSE HEAVEN KNOWS WE NEED IT what with Ludger's baggage??? so I thought hmm if she had her own trauma you know, her own skeletons she'd understand him more etc.

ik I said I'd have him interact with students more but that's mostly concentrated on the earlier chapters BUT I am moving towards that again. In Season 2 there are more characters involved! and yes i plan on adding more student interactions!

I didn't plan this lmao but lots of side characters get more lore too, like Merylda is pirate-coded my hc is that she was an adventurer and she's the big sis type of character. Selina is the innocent one but Esmeralda is still in her somewhere. Chris Benimore gets a more compelling redemption arc. Even the Chancellor gets a bit more lore.

Going back to Ludger and OC — I wanted the power imbalance to be minimized to reduce the icky — and it was important to me for them to be equals intellectually (cause like how do you even equal Ludger when it comes to magic??? lmao) and it made sense since it's an academy setting so it's actually like kinda dark academia-y?

There is a whole-ass bigger plot than what's currently written BUT there's a LOT of foreshadowing.

About the FL

(this is the updated version but the Chapter 1 also has it)

I made it a very big point to not make her a mary sue like it was very important for me that she isn't a self-insert.

She teaches Botany/Potions!

She's an Imperial Scholar! (think, national scientist kinda title) so it's like their intellect jives well together

eventually, they will do dumb things together that will make people think they share exactly 1 (one) brain cell

She wears a monocle. (my hc is that when she finds out that Ludger is James Moriarty, she will tease him that he got the idea from her)

She banters back! She is not a shy FL you'll see it by Chapter 3 LMAO??? (I personally find it weird when grown adults kinda shirk away from R18 topics? But it might also just be my desire to portray realistic human relationships so yeah.)

Not in the chapter 1 intro: She has trauma too, and she also has secrets which will slowly be unraveled! and Ludger's secrets will slowly be unraveled to her too.

Why you might not like it:

Heavy topics are discussed. But I swear to the stars (and if you see some of my author's notes on here at tumblr and if you see how i work etc you will see that I try my best to think about the story deeply and since my entire thesis is trauma/healing (BUT WITH COMEDY a lot of that and fluff too) and therefore they are treated with the utmost care and sensitivity.

Slow burn, but not a crawl, but it's LONG I personally do not read a whole lot BUT a lot of people like long fics apparently so this might be a win.

There is smut. Highly consensual. Healthy. And most importantly, plot relevant (Ik, porn with plot, who would've thought—) But still, smut.

and some people might not be into that although i try to heavily tag my work you CAN skip over those though

I said I wanted him to talk to students more but I realized in the middle that wasn't the main focus (because romance and I was trying to build the foundations of the relationships and the characters put me on a chokehold and ran away with the plot) they will be featured more prominently eventually though! (Season 2, after setting the groundwork in Season 1, has more characters fleshed out)

I feel like it really diverged from the original plan of like "lets just keep it comedic and light" cause it got deeper into things and IDK if that's a minus in your book but yeah ig just, CW apply

Now that that's out of the way (I figured I'd do people a favor if some of these things will turn them off from the work so I wouldn't waste their time)—

Here's why you might like it:

I, the author, am a freaking gremlin I WILL DEF RESPOND TO YOUR COMMENTS IF YOU WANT ME TO no comment is too small i go feral for a single "<3" because it means so much that you're reading my writing like wow??? you gave my silly blorbos some of your time in this economy???

I genuinely think it's funny dksajdnksajnda and cute and wholesome like yes ik i did say it talks about heavy stuff for a reason BUT its not trauma porn and like I try to balance it and I LOVE THEIR SNARK OK. Like I'm not into Ludger x Casey at all but I do appreciate their banter mostly because she's the only one female who banters with him??? anyway i love banter and snark

They actually have lives outside of the romance.

Click for the plot, stay for the characters.

Platonic friendships! Hobbies! Things that say their lives don't revolve around each other!

They're both nerds. We get nerdy Ludger dkajndaksjdnsa!!!

The emotional payoff is amazing imo if you can stick w/ it.

Smut.

Ludger Cherish.

Worldbuilding on a romance fic lmao we get original worldbuilding and added/expanded lore?

It's THE longest fic of the fandom by like idk 3 times??? LMAO i am COMMITTED to seeing this story through ! ! → so yeah if you like reading a lot, there you go sksksk

The relationship is very healthy.

Since I am a cryptid and I like to plan my story, there's a LOT of foreshadowing and easter eggs and callbacks it rewards those who like to re-read (totally optional. But also, HOPEFULLY when things start exploding in the plot it'll all make sense)

Some feedback I've gotten is that the characters are very well developed! I think that's the biggest strength of the work, too. I spend a lot of time on the characters and their interactions and dialogue and just how they bounce off of each other (and not just Ludger and the OC I mean everyone.)

I COULD YAP MORE BUT UHHH maybe i should stop for now

[ask-the-younger-dean]

despite the horrors we stay silly :3

>Hi! What do I even type here…

I’m kind of tired of having to introduce myself to people all the time. I’m Mariam, I’m 13, I like libraries, that’s it.

Every other month my dad forces me to move to an entirely new state and I lose all my friends and I have to start over at a new freaking school AGAIN and so I made this awesome blog now so I can still communicate with people after I move away and never see them again. and I hope my dad doesn’t find out about this.

OOC Character info under the cut.

Name: Mariam “mimi” Sue Dean. name inspo fun fact, originally I was just gonna name her Mary bc it’s a basic ass name like Jason but I felt like making it Mariam instead (omg miriam “mimi” freedman reference!! (this woman I did a history project on)).

Sue, her middle name is based off the cancelled OG version of shine a light, a girl named sue.

Age: 13 (Originally she was 12 but I aged her up so she could have a tumblr blog)

Her birthday is April 2nd since that’s when this blog was created :) Her dad calls her an expired April fools joke

Grade: 8. (she doesn't go to Westerburg.. for the better)

Family

leaving this short if anyone wants to learn by sending asks, heres an entire lore post for this

Big Bussy Dean (ew) - Father, pretty fucking neglectful, abusive, Mariam completely hates him

Jmom? Jane Dean? idk thats the name I came up with for her. Jane Doe ass. the song Dead Mom from beetlejuice is their entire relationship.

Jason Dean - Brother!! Mariam thinks everything he does (like shooting shit when he gets mad, or giving himself brain freezes) is mostly normal. Gets told she looks like her brother a lot.

. ✦⫘⫘⫘ˎˊ˗ ꒰HEADCANNONS

☆Absolutely scared to the death by quickly moving bugs that aren’t like- really slow ants/isopods or pretty butterflies. Mariam's Slowly desensitising herself to bugs by examining their dead corpses :p

☆Would love taxidermy/dissecting animals

☆Full of pent up rage and strong emotions that she doesn’t have many outlets for. Some school counsellors have tried to get her to join clubs as a way to destress and it’s had.. varying degrees of “success” (rip she’s not good at anything and ends up skipping a lot of the clubs)

☆She uses JD’s old bicycle that he used before he got his motorbike

☆Every move she makes it gets slightly harder for her to make friends as her peers grow older and meaner. (like what veronica said in beautiful) That doesn’t fully discourage her from trying to make friends, and she tries to keep in contact with friends she’s made across states.

☆Has a lot of stories from moving around. Some of them are urban legends which she loves telling others. She really likes horror (probably for the same reason JD gives himself brain freezes)

☆Pretty tall for her age :D (mwahaha @/ask-the-younger-sawyer im TALLER than u)

☆Disorganised attachment issues :(, she finds herself either yearning for attachment or repelled by it. She also experiences emotional dis regulation as a result (which I’ll talk more about in a lore post)

☆Loves zombie apocalypse scenarios. Her number one icebreaker question and she hates it when people give boring answers.

☆ Her safe item is a pound puppy she had ever since before her mom died

[scaly-freaks]

how did you create amara? she's so compelling. i'm itching to create an hotd oc (mostly for aemond tho) but i'm absolutely unable to. i grew up on the era where every female oc was called a mary sue and every time i think someone could think that of my oc i become unbearably sad. enlighten me senpai

Aaahhh the Mary Sues. Such a silly way to diss what were usually teenage writers simply trying to explore the foundational stages of creating a character. There are so many popular Gary Stus in popular media (James Bond is definitely one) but men don't get called out for it the same.

I will say it took time for me to lean into writing a character who isn't just better than me in every sense of the word, and is allowed to make her own mistakes. I have to empathise with her a lot when she does some stupid shit and I'm sitting there like girl...

The key is probably to mix the stupid shit we all do on a daily basis (and judge more harshly when done by a fictional character) with real emotions and inner thoughts that would connect to most readers. Insecurities, anxiety, etc etc. But it's important to show her wanting to get out of these pitfalls of human nature, striving to do better even when she fails. She can't be perfect and smart and sassy out the gate or there's no fun watching her become a more well-rounded person.

The most important thing about an OC isn't how she's created at the start, but how she ends up at the finish line of the journey you're taking the reader along on. Don't flesh her out too much. Give her a few key traits - habits, emotional instabilities, insecurities - and then let them expand as she interacts with Aemond. Let her be human. Rolling the eyes, smirking, and sassy comebacks are all well and good, but real people don't behave like that. Sometimes, I like to put myself in the situation and realise I would never have such a put-together response because a fic writer isn't actually writing me (unless God has something to tell me about the sham of a plotline my life currently is). Once you've figured out what you'd do in a scene where you're stuck on what to write next, then bring back all you already know about your OC and modify your own response to become hers.

I didn't plan Amara at all when I put her into Burning Jasmine. My aim was to give Aegon someone that he could call his own in a way no one else in his family was. But I also knew Aegon is a dipshit. So, their first meeting is him basically yelling at her to get him more wine and stop telling him he needs a doctor, and her immediate reaction is girl fuck you, ew. Then, he softens, because the urge to be loved always comes out in the end (see here's where canon existing does help), and then I created Amara's background with the kidnapping from Lys, and how her parents raised her with love, and understood that she would see his anger as a facet of his isolation and vulnerability, not as something independent to him that he wields like a weapon.

Also my last pointer is always going to be the same but read, read, read. I would suggest contemporary books as unlike with fantasy, they're not worldbuilding, all they have are their characters. Learn from them. Get comfortable with inner monologuing for your OC that doesn't constantly revolve around Aemond, and how she is an accessory to him. She's the main character in her head, with a whole inner world of her own, and that'll be the best way to approach it.

If none of this made sense, disclaimer - I'm not the best with advice *-*

[sunsetcurve]

about the thundermans pilot, the reason Oliver was changed into max is actually because the pilot rated VERY well among tween girls (phoebe being a relatable and cool Mary Sue protagonist type and Oliver being an attractive and edgy bad boy) but not so well among tween boys, so they made max to be a relatable character for the tween boy demographic. making them twins and letting them have more equal footing and plot importance evened out the disparity in the initial audience ratings.

I'm personally really glad they changed Phoebe's power thing, it was kinda cringe and made it way too unbalanced with the other characters, but she still remains unique in having more powers than the others, just not the 15 she had. the dichotomy of her many powers and her indifference to them being emphasized just played off as, for lack of a better phrase, too pick-me for my personal taste, and made her very one dimensional. making her basically a hero prodigy and giving her a sense of duty to do good while ALSO just wanting to be normal gave her a lot more depth and potential for character growth and conflict.

although I am really really curious about what they were planning to do with Oliver, and what it would've been like if max didn't have powers the way Oliver seemed not to. I REALLY gotta know what the plan for Oliver was, like where we're they going with that? what was his character going to be like in the long run? what was the plan for his character arc? it was really a shame he was just a B plot in the pilot, or rather that his B plot didn't reveal very much about him as a person. I wonder what it'd be like if everything was the same but Oliver existed as well like? yeah thats a lot of kids but they did end up having Chloe in the end, I'm super curious to see what it would've been like if phoebe and max weren't the oldest. though, I do think phoebe fit into the oldest sibling role very well, it suited her character a lot and did a lot for her in terms of how conflicts were explored and developed.

also, I find it really funny how, because everyone was already cast and they had filmed a pilot before recasting for max, when Jack got the audition offer he was like "the thundermans? isn't that kira's show? oh this audition is for kira's character's twin? yeah, I could see myself as kira's twin actually" because they went to the same school at the time

sorry for the ramble, I didn't realize how many thoughts I had on the subject LOL

NEVER apologize for rambling in my inbox about the thundermans, this is super interesting and i am so happy to learn more about it.

tbh that reasoning makes sense and explains why max got bumped up to being a bigger character than it seemed like oliver was going to be, and had powers of his own. i completely agree with you about phoebe; like honestly one of my favorite things about her character in the actual show was her dealing with this internal struggle of like caring about being a hero and also wanting to have normal life experiences without either of it coming off as like too one-note. i do agree that we've seen the "chosen one" storylines a lot especially with women and it was super refreshing to have phoebe as a character who kind of knew what she wanted from the get-go but had to come to terms with making sacrifices to get there.

and yeah, that was my question regarding oliver too! like with max set up as a twin with the same powers it places him on equal footing with phoebe, and you can pretty clearly tell from even the pilot episode that he's not a bad or even uncaring person at all and is very closely tied with his family. and oliver...doesn't really seem to get that? like the dynamic between hank and barb and him was sweet, especially their conversation in the car, but since he took the b-plot and didn't really interact with the rest of his siblings there was this divide just set up from the get-go. the no powers aspect only adds to that, like of course he's gonna feel really separated from the rest of his family because of that, and it also adds a new layer to the worry about always being in phoebe's shadow. i do think it would've been super interesting to see what they did with him; i have to wonder if he was gonna go further down the villain route than max did, just because he seems like a slightly edgier character overall, and phoebe was often like a moral compass for max throughout the show so without their closeness i wonder if they would've gone a different direction. i also do agree that it would've been interesting to see the dynamic of oliver with the rest of the family, but i'm a really big fan of max and phoebe as twins and counterparts—i think their rivalry is like the heart of the show, and i think having a secondary character who's like max but edgier would probably take away from that. but it's so cool to think about! i really love learning about this pilot it's making me think so much about the show and like the themes and dynamics and it's so interesting...

[bunnylouisegrimes]

I might be going on hiatus from posting content for a bit (not counting reblogging). I'm not sure yet. (Plus My Personal Fandom Frustrations)

Like the title says. I might be cleaning up some of my vent posts since I've come back to Tumblr, too. I haven't decided yet. I need to get a lot done in the next eight days that I'm gonna have off after tomorrow's day of work related to studying for the NCLEX. I've been ruminating a lot lately on feeling inadequate in fandom, and every time I post (especially artwork), I feel an odd sense of anxiety and disgust, like it's just not good enough, literally nobody cares about it, etc. The truth is, I know there are people who care, and I deeply appreciate all of you who do 🫂❤️. If only I could make myself stop falling into these bad headspaces.

It depresses me to see the direction fandom culture in general has gone. The focus on consumption and not community is a huge element. I know Canon x Canon ships have always been the most popular in any fandom, and OC x Canon has either been despised or made into a subtle competition amongst each other (who's OC and ship is the least "Mary Sue-ish," who's OC and ship is the most sexy, who's OC and ship is the most logical, etc., when really, the focus should be the equal uniqueness of each OC x Canon ship), and Self Insert x Canon is always the most despised/hated/ignored, but all of these pre-existing issues in fandom culture on top of this newly accepted consumption vs community problem has made me very sad and made it difficult for me to truly be proud of my work at times.

I think it doesn't help that, as much as I am proud of how niche, "real," and self-indulgent my works are, how much I really try to capture a very human experience in my works to help others who understand my feelings feel less alone (just as many works from others have helped me in that sense), I feel that because my works don't focus on "what's popular," they're wastes of time and no one cares, and that they must suck. They're not helping anyone and bringing anyone happiness like so many other pieces of content.

Since The Purge/Polite Leader doesn't really have a fandom and never really has (sadly), from the AP community perspective, I feel inadequate compared to so many talented people here. Of course, I'm so happy to find a community I wanted when I first got into Patrick in the fall of '21. But I just can't give back to so many of you in the "right" way. I can't provide you PaulPat (the most popular Canon x Canon ship here) because I don't like it. I can't provide X Reader fics because I'm terrible at writing them, as much as I love reading them myself. I can't even provide an interesting OC people recognize and enjoy. I can't even write stuff about abusing Patrick (yes, he's an asshole, he deserves it, but I don't personally like it like I thought I did when I first got into him and "hated" him). Basically, what I'm getting at is: I can't provide content this community enjoys and makes everyone happy based on numbers and reception, and I'm so sorry. I wish I could properly express my appreciation for being here, but instead, I'm left feeling like, "almost everyone enjoys this thing, and almost no one enjoys your thing, it clearly sucks and you're like a little parasite here in this community clogging AO3 and the tags here with your self insert crap."

So Idk, maybe I'll change my mind tomorrow and post something when I get home from work. Who knows for now. I just wanted to vent out on some of the reasons I've been depressed and frustrated with myself and the way fandom culture is (not that I can control the latter, it's a global collective problem plauging a hobby). I just wish I could express my appreciation for this community so much more, and I wish I had that ability to post things I know this community enjoys and likes rather than share the pathetic crap I know no one likes.

To my closest friends on here who always support me: you're the real ones. You know who you are, and I never ever want you to feel that I don't appreciate you and your endless support. I love you so deeply, and you're the reason I haven't given up from posting online altogether ❤️ 💖 In fact, you're the reason I even came back, and I'm so happy that I've met you every day. I hope we remain close for years to come 🫂♥️

[coimbrabertone]

A Self-Indulgent Blogpost About My Motorsports Fiction

So, this weekend, MotoGP had a good sprint while the main race was a snoozer, and NASCAR ended with a twenty-eight-car pileup followed by a plate merchant winning the race.

Which makes me not really want to talk about either of them.

I could talk a bit more on Andretti - Michael revealed today that stepping back was a personal decision after forty years of being involved in Indycar, half as a driver, half as a team owner - but I don't really have a ton more to say on that either.

So, what do I want to talk about?

Well, I kinda want to talk about my writing.

I've kinda wanted to do that for a bit now, but I always thought that one: it was a bit self-indulgent to promote my fanfic on here too much, and two: I wasn't sure if people would particularly care. Well, I talked to some friends about it, and they encouraged it, so I figured...why not?

Thus, today I'll be talking about my motorsports fiction, my racing fanfics that I primarily post on AO3. I've completed one story Life at the Speed of Formula One, I wrote a 1950s Grand Prix one-shot called A Beautiful Race, and I'm currently writing two stories: An 1980s CART Indycar story called The Fastest of the Prancing Horses, and a 2000s NASCAR story called Racing in the Golden Age.

For this blogpost, I will mainly be talking about LatSoF1 because it is finished and because as my first real motorsports story, it more or less set the mold for the rest.

The link:

So...where to begin but the tags?

I have this story labeled under two fandoms, Original Work and Formula 1 RPF, why is that?

Well, it boils down to the fact that I don't quite think it fits firmly into either category. It is an original work about Formula One, but it's not really RPF either.

RPF, for those unaware of fanfic terms, means Real People Fiction.

In my stories, however, I've decided to fictionalize living people, particularly those central to the plot. There's a few reasons for this, one is that I felt odd having my OC (original character) interacting with real drivers - and admittedly a part of that is that I didn't really want this to read like a self-insert fic, where my Mary Sue gets to race with Lewis Hamilton and Fernando Alonso and Sebastian Vettel and all that - especially when I'm going to tackle things like tabloid rumors and opinions on homosexuality and driver feuds in these things.

The long and short of it is that I feel more comfortable having fictionalized driver Felipe Alvarez as an antagonistic figure rather than Fernando Alonso himself.

Does that matter to people reading it who are just going to connect the dots and see Alvarez as Alonso anyway? Maybe, maybe not.

Anyway, I'm getting a bit ahead of myself. Let's get back to establishing the context.

The story begins in 2007, with Kazakhstan-born ethnic-Russian driver Tamara Shchegolyayeva signed to Williams banked by Kazakhstani oil and gas companies.

Let's unpack that a bit.

Why 2007?

The initial idea of the story, before it branched off into something larger, was to cover the tight and dramatic 2007 championship battle from the perspective of someone in Formula One but outside of the proper title battle. Almost like a third-person view on the title challenge from a first-person perspective.

Tamara Shchego-what's it?

Okay, so admittedly Kazakhstani driver with a really long name probably isn't the most believable package for a late-2000s Formula One driver, but I think that's part of what made this idea interesting to me.

I'm a geography and history nerd, so I'm drawn to off-the-wall places where so many different cultures and histories intertwine. Kazakhstan has the Silk Road, the Mongol Empire, Russian Imperialism, and Soviet Communism all in its history. Its people are like a microcosm of all of Asia with East Asian, Turco-Persian, and Indo-European phenotypes all present, with people ranging from literal nomads to Kazakh Muslims to ethnic Russians.

Thus, I decided that it would be interesting to write a protagonist from there.

However, Formula One is also...Formula One. So how does a person from there get to the cynical, cutthroat world of big money global motorsport?

Well, I made her the daughter of a petty oligarch and sponsored by oil money.

This also allowed me to explore a number of things. The legacy of Russian Imperialism, the question of where she belongs - I placed her ancestry right on the tripoint border of Russia, Ukraine, and Belarus, had her born in Kazakhstan, and had her grow up and live in Monaco - the morality of oil money, the morality of sponsorships in general, and, eventually, of being a gay woman in a male-dominated, conservative, globe-spanning sport.

I won't pretend I covered these areas perfectly - and at least in some cases, I wrote Tamara as having complicated, potentially problematic feelings on things - but I think it was at least interesting.

Fictionalized Drivers.

My general rule with people in the story is that the more involved in the plot they were, the more I'd differentiate them from the drivers they were based off of.

Thus, German Nico Rosberg became Finn Tommy Koskinen. The background was generally the same - Finnish father, German mother, raised in Monaco - but by distinguishing him from the driver he was based off of in these ways, I felt more comfortable having him interact with Tamara, to show his opinions, to have a teammate dynamic with her.

This extended to Anthony Harrison, probably the most fictionalized of the drivers. Based loosely off of Lewis Hamilton, Anthony is the son of a black American army mechanic and a white Englishwoman, growing up in that background to become a top Formula One prospect with McLaren.

He enters the plot as a fellow rookie to Tamara, and eventually, the two of them bonding leads to tabloid rumors that they're a couple. A bit of drama that Tamara wants no part in, but foreshadows a later storyline that turns her career upside.

Kazakhstan and Russia.

I mentioned before that Tamara struggles a bit with representing Kazakhstan as an ethnic Russian, but as part of her caught between two worlds storylines, I also had her struggle with her Russian identity as well. She's got it in her blood, but she wasn't born there, didn't grow up there, and has no love for the regime there.

This got more complicated because, in real life, Russia escalated the war in Ukraine a month after I started this story.

One of the cited reasons was Russian-speaking minorities in Ukraine.

That made writing about a Russian from another post-Soviet country awkward, and I wanted to find a way to address it within the context of this story.

Thus, during the 2008 season in LatSoF1, I talked a lot about the Russian invasion of Abkhazia and South Ossetia within Georgia, where Putin and Medvedev tried more or less the same tricks. Using Russian minorities in those countries to justify naked landgrabs.

This allowed me to solidify Tamara's position as someone who was born in Kazakhstan and is of Russian descent, and loves the people of both countries, but does not love either regime.

And come 2009 and 2010, the final two seasons featured in the story, and she gets away from depending on either country for sponsorship.

So, that's a whole lot of background out of the way, now...let's talk about how I wrote the story itself.

Writing Races.

LatSoF1 was my first real racing focused work and therefore in the early days, there were some adjustments to how I wrote things.

I decided on two races a chapter being the norm, thinking it would be an efficient way to get through the season without getting bogged down too much in yapping about a fictionalized version of a real race.

And to a degree, it did its job.

However, I did also end up more or less skipping the Malaysian Grand Prix that first year as I jumped to the race results. I don't think I'd do that now. I'd write about how the race was going overall and what Tamara was doing and then end on the results.

How did I get the results? Well, to keep things grounded in reality, I based Tamara's 2007 results on what Alexander Wurz achieved in that 2007 Williams irl. I can get the results real quick on Wikipedia, maybe go to Racing Reference for an obscure race or if I need more detail, and another thing that helped a lot for LatSoF1 specifically is the old F1 season review videos. I watched the reviews for 2007, 2008, 2009, and 2010 in the making of LatSoF1.

For CART stuff more recently, it's been a bit harder to find some specific information for like qualifying sessions from 1989. Some of that stuff is preserved on VHS rips on youtube and I've used those before, but what I've found to be helpful is actually some skills I picked up as a history major in college: old newspapers.

The LA Times and Chicago Tribute have tended to be my personal favorites because they have a significant digitized backlog, and don't require signing up to read through it like the New York times.

Hell, earlier this very day I was looking for some information on the Galles-Kraco merger ahead of the 1989 season - I wanted to know if Kraco stayed in the Compton garage or if they moved in with the Galles team in Albuquerque - and finally found the information in a brief mention at the bottom of an LA Times article.

This one, to be exact:

Thank you very much LA Times for making random stories from June 1989 accessible.

So yeah, sometimes it's easy and I can just get what I need off of Wikipedia and work from there, other times I need to go digging deeper, but the point remains: I find the real results and use them a s a baseline.

All that being said, it would be a bit boring to just slap my OC's name on a real driver's results and call it a day, so once I find what I need, I tend to change things around a bit.

First thing that comes to mind from LatSoF1 is the 2007 European Grand Prix, where Mark Webber finished third, just barely holding off Wurz.

In LatSoF1, Tamara got him in the last corner and took a podium finish.

That being said, I made sure not to get too carried away either.

At the end of 2007, Tamara finished on 18 points with two third places (Canada and Nürburgring) being the highlights of her season. In comparison, Nico Rosberg - and indeed Tommy Koskinen - finished 2007 on 20 points, whilst Wurz irl finished on 13.

Five points gained on real life is hardly Mary Sue behavior imo, so i don't consider that too obscene.

Who did I take those points off of? Well, I tried to keep that pretty even-handed as well, switching Mark Webber's third for Martin Weaver's fourth place in Europe.

Tamara also took Ralf Schumacher's eighth place in Australia from Roland Ziegler. Another eighth in Turkey off of Robert Kubica/Piotr Kaminski, a third eighth place in Italy off of Jenson Button/James Buxton, and a fourth eighth place in Brazil off of Jarno Trulli/Ivan Tripoli.

Pretty even-handed overall. No one driver was bullied for his results, and I didn't cause any massive swings in the championships.

Speaking of all those drivers I just named...

Fictionalized Names.

How did I come up with driver names? It varies.

Some names, particularly for people who didn't feature too much in the story, were just playing around with their real name. I'd put Martin Weaver for Mark Webber and James Buxton in that category.

Other names are little inside jokes I have with myself. I can't think of any from LatSoF1 off the top of my head, but in my CART story, real life driver Rich Vogler is renamed after Saints Row 2 antagonist Dane Vogel.

Why? Because I love Saints Row 2 and that popped into my head when I saw Vogler. Vogler-Vogel, it makes sense.

A good amount of names are ripped from players I had in Football Manager saves. Piotr Kaminski (Robert Kubica) I had at Cracovia in a save on FM21, and later on that same manager moved to Napoli, where I had a Japanese winger named Yoshikazu Higashiyama. I loved that player so much I used his name for Kamui Kobayashi once I included him in the story.

And other names are in reference to other drivers. In the late 2000s, Red Bull had a fetish for drivers named Seb: Sebastien Bourdais, Sebastien Buemi, Sebastien Loeb, Sebastien Ogier, and of course Sebastian Vettel.

In LatSoF1, that's replaced with a fetish for drivers named Max, in reference to their current boytoy Verstappen: thus, it's Maximilien Lecroix for Bourdais, Maximilien Longpre for Buemi, and Maximilian Renner for Seb Vettel.

Oh, and I made Longpre a Luxembourger in place of Buemi who is Swiss. Why? Because I like throwing in a comparatively underrepresented country every once in awhile.

Fringe Benefits.

On a lighter note, this is something I enjoyed about LatSoF1 a lot: it was a Formula One story, but being set in the near past, there was so much little stuff I could touch on. Tamara would have thoughts on geopolitics, video games, TV shows, other racing series, other sports, she'd get to tour a nuclear reactor at one point, she's get to rock some cool outfits, and she'd build up a bit of a car collection.

It was cool!

Most of the stuff I wrote before LatSoF1 was like historical fiction or Star Wars stuff, so it was nice to just be able to write about a person who, outside of an extraordinary job, is more or less just a regular person.

When I was getting into MotoGP for the first time, I could write a scene about her discussing MotoGP with some Italian engineers.

When I was watching Chernobyl, I got to have her tour a Soviet nuclear reactor in Saint Petersburg.

When I wasn't loving Formula One as much as I used to, I had her dabble in sports cars and Indycar during a bit of a sabbatical I had her in.

Speaking of, that brings me to...

What I'd Do Differently Now:

I started LatSoF1 in January 2022 and finished it in June 2023. I still consider it to be one of my best works and I'm proud of it, however, part of writing - and this is for everyone, not just me - is that you're always learning more. I'd say my writing back then was good, but I think it's gotten better now - certainly not perfect, but better - so...what would I do if I was doing it now?

The first two things are more technical:

One: I think I'm better at breaking up big blocks of text now, alternating between paragraphs and short lines, which I think makes for a more readable experience.

Two: I was getting better at this as I was writing LatSoF1, but I still think I could've been better about dialogue. I think dialogue is a bit of a weakness in my writing, one I'm working on, but a weakness nonetheless.

I probably could've done a better job with dialogue in LatSoF1.

Beyond that...I struggle at having my protagonists do things that are out of my character. Part of that is inevitable - write somebody long enough, particularly in first person, and parts of you will bleed into that character whether you like it or not - but it also led to me dropping one and a half plotlines.

One and a half? Let me explain.

There is a part of LatSoF1 after the 2008 season where Tamara loses her sponsorship in F1 and goes on a bit of a downward spiral. I initially had the idea that she'd develop a drinking problem during this point and eventually recover for it, to the point where she wouldn't drink podium champagne and would always just spray it before handing it off to the team.

I chickened out on this because I didn't feel comfortable writing about someone struggling with alcoholism given that I don't drink.

Then we move onto the half.

I initially wanted Tamara to be a bit more promiscuous once she comes out, and she'd have a few different girlfriends and maybe a few one-night stands throughout the storyline. It the end, I chopped this storyline way down.

Roksana is her first girlfriend, she has a one-night stand with Daniella, and then she's with Ysabella for the rest of the story.

Alexis was supposed to be another girlfriend, but in the end she's just the Ferrari PR that follows Tamara around for that little half a season she did there.

Again, my only romantic experience has been monogamous, so I chickened out of writing something I didn't know.

Now, who knows if writing out of my comfort zone would be any good, but I do wish I tried.

As I move on from LatSoF1 and onto new projects, I'm trying to be better about writing outside of my comfort zone. Right now with the CART story I have Vincenza Taghzouti becoming more assertive and combative in the media, arguably taking a bit of a villain role as she battles the American "boys club" of established drivers.

Meanwhile in the NASCAR story, Lilith Zilinskas has been more promiscuous and had a bit of a self-destructive streak for awhile, and now is dealing with her ex-girlfriend reentering her life...with a daughter, no less. This lets me explore some of the themes I chickened out of doing with Tamara, and also adds in a bit of a parenting aspect in the current day that I've never touched on before.

I'm excited to see how these attempts play out, and I hope that by the end of them, I'll have sufficiently differentiated my three protagonists.

Anyway, this has been a long and self-indulgent blogpost, but I very much enjoyed writing it. Please feel free to ask questions below, because I could go on much, much longer about my writing if given the chance.

[jesterbiscuits]

BRIGHT COLOR WARNING‼️‼️

More other ocs design💥💥💥

Still trying to get them to have the same attention like my warrior cats ocs have💥💥💥

Damn should have looked better when I did his spike collar bc now I'm just realizing that it looks like THE ANIMAL JAM CLASSIC SPIKE COLLAR OMG CMON MAN💔

Not a lot to say about this goober but he was killed and eaten right after by the god themselves when a fire was happening-

(THAT'S ONE WAY RO EXPLAIN IT RIGHT⁉️)

(HE GOT THAT CANNIBALISM TREATMENT BY THE GOD WHO HE THOUGHT WAS GONNA GET SMTH FOR ACCEPTING A DEAL TO GET A WISH IN RETURN💀)

(BINGO THE GOD WIN HERSELF ANOTHER BODY TO USE AND TRAUMATIC OTHER PPL WITH💯💯💯💯)

(and no there isn't just 1 god there's uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I think about 14 or 16 or who knows how many, but 10 of them are the what the gods that other ppl rely on, GO AHEAD CALL ME A MARY SUE OC MARKER BUT THAT DOESNT STOP ME FROM MAKING MORE OF THEM AND LOVING THEM ALL‼️‼️)

(why the fuck did I catch myself lying to myself and y'all face about loving them all!? Nah man I only like 1 god Oc I made and shes gonna get the same treatment like I did with Mud'star🤑🤑🤑🤑)

[thecaffeinebookwarrior]

Am I the only person who doesn’t like Wonder Woman and thinks she is, in fact, a Mary Sue? I haven’t read or watched much with her in it so maybe I’m just basing my opinions on one Wonder Woman book I read where I thought she was written poorly.

But I don’t know. She’s literally everything a modern woman is supposed to be (sexy, strong, righteous, soft, etc.) and she never struggles. She’s always right, she never makes mistakes, and she’s very boring to me as a result. I haven’t seen the recent film, but I dislike the fact that they made her love babies. A lot of pressure is put on women to love babies/children and/or want one of their own, and if a woman doesn’t like or want them then she’s seen as a cold, callous bitch. So to me, that part seems like the writers put it in thinking ‘see she’s not an evil man hating feminist you guys, she loves babies!’

Idk. I know she’s seen as THE role model for women and girls but I just can’t understand her appeal. What exactly do you like about her?

Hello there!

As someone who grew up with a lot of Wonder Woman content, I have to personally disagree!

Like any major superhero, Wonder Woman gets a lot of good content and plenty of bad content, too.

Yes, she's idealized - but almost all superheroes are idealized. Superman is literally a mirror of the philosophical concept of the "Ubermensch," a term coined by Nietzsche meaning "superman" and describing an ideal human being. By this standard, he could also be described as a Mary Sue!

But just being beautiful, powerful, and good does not a Mary Sue make. These idyllic superheroes work well when they're put in circumstances that challenge them. It's fascinating to see characters that seemingly embody the highest reaches of human potential pushed to their limits, when we see that they too have flaws and weaknesses that they can overcome through perseverance.

You say that she "never struggles," but a good Wonder Woman writer knows that she NEEDS to struggle to be interesting. In shows like the animated Justice League and Justice League Unlimited, she and all the other major heroes are put in situations that challenge them on every level - physical (like fighting literal gods) and emotional (being banished from her home for bringing men to the island).

And also funny scenarios that put them at disadvantages, like being turned into children or a pig that then must be chased through the city by Batman (yes, both real episodes) that humanize them and show that they're not invulnerable.

For the more recent, live action movies, I liked the first Wonder Woman but not the second. I personally liked the fact that she was excited to see a baby, especially in the context that there were no babies on her island, because women are often expected to reject feminine characteristics to be strong.

I see your point, but I also have a different view regarding children: I think a lot of the oppression experienced by women is also experienced by children, and children are frequently dehumanized.

Not everyone who says they don't like kids is a bad person - I know plenty of great people who say they don't like kids - but I'm not really comfortable with the concept of disliking an entire group of human beings. Children have such varied personalities, just like any other group.

Granted, most people who say they don't like kids don't mean they dislike ALL kids, but it's still a sentiment I don't really like from a cultural standpoint.

As for women who don't WANT kids, I agree - it's deeply messed up that many people don't see women as complete or fulfilled unless they have kids. But (though it's been a while since I've seen it) I don't recall Wonder Woman in the 2017 movies planning to have children of her own. Plenty of women like children without intending to have them, myself included.

Again, though, I do see your point that the writers may have been trying to soften Wonder Woman in the eyes of the audience by having her love babies.

I still prefer that over the original Joss Whedon script, where a little girl at one point asks her to get a cat down from a tree (I think. Perhaps it was a lost toy) and Wonder Woman callously tells her to get it herself. To me, that plays into a sexist stereotype that women must reject all feminine attributes in order to be strong.

The sequel film, on the other hand, really embodies how NOT to write Wonder Woman in every way: largely exempt from moral criticism, inherently better than those around her, and with few meaningful challenges that aren't solved through plot convenience. She isn't "always right," however, because another flaw in that film's plot is the fact that she's learning a vague and contrived lesson of not cheating to get what she wants, though that's never explored in any way that feels human or applicable.

To conclude, I'll reiterate -- and this is just my opinion -- Wonder Woman is done GREAT when written by someone who understands the appeal of the character. Her idyllic characteristics apply to most superheroes, and can work great if the person writing her knows how to challenge her. I don't mind when she has feminine characteristics, and I love when all superheroes love kids, male and female. And last but not least, Justice League and Justice League unlimited reign supreme in terms of superhero content.

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to ramble and spill my potentially controversial opinions!

[fainthedcherry]

When I was a child in 2013, visiting Nickelodeon's site and finding a treasure-trove of Spongebob, Winx and TMNT flash games was like magic to me. BUT MAN. The TMNT flash games are one of the best ever to me I've played in my life. (on an aesthetic stand-point! Turtle Tactics and Dark Horizons are so awesome man, legendary flash games to me.)

Since I am utterly autistic about 4 green alien turtles and their rat dad...Here we are again. With me posting OC cringe 2016 me would've killed myself over :V (cry about it 11 yo/ me, afraid of cringe culture back then, it's DEAD NOW)

Gonna sneak-post my redo of that ancient drawing I did of Alex 2 years ago, for the base-post : D

2 years ago, I used flashpoint to replay it for the first time in years and I remember crying of glee LOL (I still play Dark Horizons and turtle tactis to this day btw). I played Dark Horizons and Turtle Tactics and also TMNT: Throw Back (NO I DID NOT NAME THIS LIKE A MEME THIS IS ITS NAME. I STILL BURST INTO LAUGHTER LIKE A CHILD OVER THE NAME AGING POORLY DUE TO INTERNET LINGO)

Those 2 flash games are just so...Technically advanced?? For its time?? LIKE A FULLY FLEDGED 3D FLASH GAME WITH UNITY ENGINE BASIS? DAMN. And then Dark Horizons? CHEF'S KISS I LOVE THAT GAME SO MUCH. AESTHETICALLY AND THE COMBAT FEELS RLLY NICE TO ME IMO, AND JUST...Everything about THAT flash game, god TIMELESS CLASSIC I COULD YAP ON FOR HOURS ABOUT THIS NO JOKE.

I am enthralled by the designs and art of Dark Horizons, it's why I made this drawing. The game just..Speaks to me on so many levels. IT'S JUST SO PLEASING TO SEE ALL THE ARTWORK I EXTRACTED. As far to my knowledge- it never got released, so I might make a post of just a few favourites I liked from the game. :D

I just wonder if I can post those in the first place, it's after all, not my artwork, from a flash game, and TMNT, so yeah, legal IP and stuff. I unfortunately don't know who the artist if of the flash games, but if I can find that out via googling or digging for credits in the game or the files, I'll see if I can credit them, so that posting will be fairly accredited!!

OH YEAH RIGHT ALSO QUICK BANTER ABT ART SORRY I AM VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT THOSE FLASH GAMES AS YOU CAN TELL,,,

I studied the in-game sprites for a good few hours back then, and did my best to replicate it to the best of my abilities!! I think Mushu maybe could've been done better looking back at it, but I think it was the best that I could do back then. :D Plus, I remember being really happy, excited and proud of this piece, as it reflected something, my childhood self always wanted: For Alex to like.."fake" being an official character LOL. I had sooo many dreams where Alex was hanging out with the turtles and Ninjago and throwing in Power Rangers for good measure, just...Everything I liked as a child, I somehow connected in my dreams via either "OH YEAH THE RAINBOW FAIRY!" or "OH YEAH SUDDENLY PORTAL AND MY MARY-SUES JUST BRAVE IT WHILST THE OFFICIAL CHARACTERS DRAMATICALLY TELL THEM NOT TO GO"

^I had vivid and....Creative dreams as a child to say the least, sometimes even Darth Vader and Eggman appeared as the bad guys, despite TMNT and Power Rangers and Ninjago w/ the snakes and lord Garmadon or however you spell him (I never checked + I'm German so ofc his name might be different in english)- I- do I have to go on about the dreams I FULLY remember I had, as a 6-9 yo/, until I told myself at 10 how embarassing my dreams are and stopped doing so? I DIGRESS. I..Need to be more professional in these, instead of such pure fandom trash oml, I feel bad for whoever actually has to read through my blatant autistic interests as a child and thinking "wtf is he on about" dfgklfdg

ANYWAY NEKST POST IS THE BASE. I SWEAR. SORRY I LOVE RAMBLING