#not to b Cringe but today was really so much fun i really needed this boost of excitement and joy
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#BUT ALSO BEFORE I GO TO BED. sincerity for a second#not to b Cringe but today was really so much fun i really needed this boost of excitement and joy#and seeing the yearly big drop for undoubtedly one of my biggest interests ever#and ive Said this before but this Is the fandom where i feel the most seen and appreciated#and the experience watching the episode wouldn’t be half as fun without everyone#so ya Thank you. again i needed this i feel so much better than i have been#ok Bye . for today#odieart#spooky month spoilers
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I Knew It Would Hurt ~ Part 9
Pairings: Zoro x Fem!Reader, Sanji x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 4,715
This is part 9 of the Series 'We've All Got Needs,' linked below:
We've All Got Needs Masterlist
Ao3 Series Link
Summary: You're waiting for the boys to make their decision. Waiting is really fucking hard.
Rating/Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content, Fem!Reader, 18+ Only, MDNI, Reader-Insert, Smut, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Relationship Discussions, Relationship Drama, Vaginal Fingering, Cunnilingus, Penis in Vagina Sex, I left out some tags to avoid spoilers but there’s nothing crazy if you’ve read this far already
A/N: Here's another rollercoaster, and it's the longest one so far! I'm super grateful for all of your interactions with this story. I've loved turning that little smut scene into this fun character dynamic, and I really hope you enjoy this next installment. Thank you!!
A soft knock at the door woke you, and for a moment you felt fine. Then you remembered.
“I’ve got your breakfast, can I come in?”
Nami frowned when she saw you. She set your plate down on your desk, then pulled you into a hug.
“This whole thing seems like a lot of work. I’m here if you need me, okay?”
“Thanks, Nami. All I wanted to do was take a long shower, and now I might be breaking up with two people I’m not actually with.”
“Gotta be careful about those showers, they can fuck you up.”
You gave a laugh that might have been a sob before squeezing her tighter.
“Love you.”
She pulled away, but grabbed your shoulders, leaning her face toward yours.
“Love ya too, weirdo. What do you need today?”
“Um, can you bring me my field notes? Chopper knows where they are. I’m just gonna work in here today, I’m not ready to people.”
“Of course. I can bring you your other meals too if you want.”
Sighing as you nodded, memories of recent times in the kitchen fought you as you tried to shove them down.
“Luffy really thinks you’re sick now.”
“He might not be far off. I feel like shit.”
After Nami came back to drop off lunch later, another knock came, freezing you on the spot.
“Hi, it’s Robin.”
You cringed a bit, embarrassed for her to see you like this, but you let her in. Her eyes combed over you, lips pursing as she stepped inside. She kept a noticeable distance between you.
“Y/N, I came to apologize. I shouldn’t have been pushing you like this, I knew you were overwhelmed already. I’m so sorry I added to your struggle.”
“No, Robin, it's okay. You helped me! I really needed to hear what you said.”
Robin let out a breath, but her brows were still tensed. She looked down at the ground before meeting your eyes again.
“I shouldn’t have pushed myself on you. I’m sorry, Y/N.”
Her normally steady eyes looked heavy, a sight she rarely shows.
Reaching for her hand, you felt a gentle smile warming your face.
“I’m not sorry.”
Her lips curled up just a bit, and she squeezed your fingers gently.
“I’m so glad to hear that… How about we wait on that date until everything settles?”
You almost argued that you didn’t need to wait, but you realized that you did.
“Thank you, Robin.”
She brushed a strand of hair from your face, and you breathed in her lovely scent.
“Thank you, Y/N. Let me know if you need anything. I’ll do what I can to calm the rest of the crew.”
The comfort that Robin's presence left you with made you feel safer, warmer.
But it was as if that feeling of safety made room for your body to feel the rest.
Sitting at your desk staring at your field notes, your vision started to blur. You had to close your journal to keep tears from staining your monographs.
You kept your sobs silent, not wanting anyone to hear. Then you remembered why you’d gotten so good at keeping your screams quiet lately. You had to cover your mouth as you choked, louder sobs escaping you now.
Why did I do this to myself? I knew it would hurt. Just not this much, not so fast. I should have stopped.
But you hated that thought. The thought of not enjoying the short time you’d had with both of them. The pleasures, the laughter, the growing warmth. You didn’t want to lose any of it, even if it would hurt less.
You tried not to think about what choice they would make. The only one you wanted felt selfish. You’d get to have everything.
And if you didn’t get to have everything, then it would be nothing. You knew that even if one of the boys chose to leave, and one wanted to stay, you couldn’t continue with only one. There was too much heat between all three of you. You knew it would drive an even bigger wedge between them, potentially tearing them, and the crew apart.
I can’t do that.
So it was all or nothing, and your body was preparing you for the worst.
A knock shook you from your spiral and you moved to the door, expecting Nami. Wiping your tears and shaking your arms, you checked.
“Who is it?”
“Hi, Y/N. I’ve got your dinner, and I didn’t eat any of it.”
Your eyes went wide, but you let your captain in.
“Thank you, Luffy.”
He walked right in, setting your plate on your desk before plopping on your bed.
You stared, not sure what to say. He pointed to your desk chair, and you felt suddenly terrified as you sat and faced him. He watched you like he was sizing you up.
“Robin told me and Chopper why you’ve been weird.”
“O-Oh?”
“I’m the captain, Y/N. I need to know my crew is okay.”
Fear iced through you, and you stared into your lap. He should kick me off the crew. I’m splintering his best fighters, endangering everyone.
His hand stretched toward you, and he touched your shoulder until you met his eyes.
“It all seems a little crazy to me.”
You let out a near panicked laugh before you caught yourself.
“Yeah, me too.”
“But you care about them?”
His deep eyes looked so soft, his voice intense.
“I do.”
Nodding, he crossed his arms.
“They care about you too, Y/N.”
You felt your lips shaking, heat rising in your throat.
“As long as you care about each other, and keep fighting for your dreams, I’m happy.”
Hot tears spilled down your cheeks as Luffy started to smile.
“Can you be happy too?”
Your lips pulled into a strained smile as you tried to stop your tears.
“I’ll get there, Luffy. It’s just rough right now. But I’m glad you’re my captain.”
Luffy was beaming at you now, then stretched to ruffle your hair. He leaned toward you, and whispered softly.
“Will you keep giving me the extra food Sanji makes you?”
You burst out laughing, and Luffy’s smile stretched even wider.
“Yes, captain!”
Luffy grabbed you in a hug, twirling you as much as he could in the small quarters. This is family.
As he left he gave you one more serious look.
“Y/N, please tell me next time something is hurting you. I’m your captain and I need to know.”
“I promise, Luffy.”
All the emotions of the day had you feeling empty, but now it was more pleasantly numb. Your biggest fear of losing your place on this crew, in this family, those fears were shrinking away from you. Soft tears of relief left your eyes now, and you tried to comfort yourself against the hurt of losing Zoro and Sanji. At least I won’t lose them completely.
That thought brought back more of the pain, but you shook it off. It was getting late, and you wanted to get some air. Steeling yourself, you picked up your dishes and went down the hall, hoping to sneak them into the galley before sitting out on deck.
You crept against the wall, listening to check if Sanji was inside or not before heading in.
But you heard two low voices.
“You don’t know her like I do.”
“I care about her, Marimo. I care about her enough to share her with you. Can you say the same?”
You tried to force your body to turn around, to head back to your room, but all you could focus on was not shaking the plate and silverware in your hands.
Your heart was in your throat, and you felt faint as you waited for what felt like hours for his response.
“Yeah, I can, idiot cook.”
A gasping sob escaped you, and you tried to cover your mouth. Instead, you dropped your dishes, the plate shattering at your bare feet. You stared at the broken porcelain, and started laughing hysterically.
“Y/N!”
They both rushed out, concern in their eyes.
“Are you hurt?” “You okay?”
You were too out of it to respond, and kept laughing as they both tried to lift you. Zoro won, lifting you in his arms, while Sanji brushed along your feet and legs, checking for glass.
Your breathing slowed as you felt Zoro’s racing heart, and you felt like you could fall asleep in his arms. He carried you into the kitchen while Sanji swept up the broken plate.
Zoro placed you gingerly in the booth, his brows furrowed as he looked you over.
“Needy, please. Are you okay?”
You smiled at the nickname, and looked at them both as Sanji joined you at the table.
“I’m okay.”
Neither of them seemed convinced, but you couldn’t explain the rush of relief and happiness that had just torn through your already overwhelmed system. But you tried.
“I didn’t mean to. But I heard you.”
You felt your lips quivering again as they both seemed to soften.
“It’s okay if you still need some time to think-”
“I don’t need time my love-” “I’m good, Needy-”
Your cheeks hurt from the smile that stretched your face, especially when they both grinned back at you.
Then your mouth stretched further into the biggest, loudest yawn you’d ever felt.
“You need some sleep-” “Let’s get you to bed, dear-”
Zoro went to lift you, but Sanji tapped his shoulder.
“You just carried her, It’s my turn now.”
“I’m not letting a pervert cook into her bedroom when she needs to rest.”
“Boys,” you commanded with another yawn. “Flip a coin or something please, I’m tired.”
Your yawns were mixed with tired giggles while you saw them rustling through their pockets. Sanji’s satisfied laugh, and Zoro’s grumble gave away the winner.
Sanji lifted you gently, and you smelled cigarette smoke and spices on his jacket. Zoro followed close, opening the door, and hovering while Sanji set you in bed, drawing the covers over you.
“Good night, darling-” “Good night, Needy-”
“Night, boys…”
A soft knock woke you, and for a moment you felt all that sadness. Then you remembered.
You sat straight up in bed, hoping that it wasn’t a dream.
“Who-Who is it?”
“Your favorite navigator, lazybones. Do you want to come to breakfast?”
You jumped out of bed, stumbling.
“Yeah, I’ll be right out!”
Your reflection looked dazed, and you slapped your cheeks a few times, laughing. You hurried to get ready, and had to stop yourself from racing down the hall.
Everyone was there, already digging into their plates. They all turned to stare at you with teasing, or cheesy faces. Your face flushed, and you bit your lip before climbing into the empty spot Zoro had saved for you. You were next to him at the edge of the table, where Sanji stepped up to bring you what looked like a mimosa with tangerine blossoms for a garnish.
“Hey, why don’t I get one of those?”
“Apologies Nami, dear. I will whip one up for you right away. Would you like one as well, Robin?”
“That sounds lovely, Sanji.”
“Hey, don’t hog the booze, waiter. Make me one of those too.”
“You haven’t earned it, moss hea-”
Everyone's clamoring voices died down as you burst out laughing, almost hysterical, but so full of joy and relief.
Luffy grinned, stretching to hit your arm lightly with his fist, Chopper looked confused, Usopp was asking Sanji for his own mimosa, and Nami and Robin laughed with you.
The boys had stopped arguing, and were both staring at you. Until your skin flushed red again, and your laughter hiccuped and faded.
“Ugh. I love you, Y/N, but this is gonna get annoying real fast.”
You stuck your tongue out at Nami as she winked, and fell into quiet joy while you tried to listen to the group.
Sanji kept bringing you delicious gifts, and you’d wink at Luffy so he could snag them. Each time Sanji came your way he would give you a soft peck on the forehead, or shoulder, or knuckles.
A low grumble moved through Zoro, but all he did was wrap his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his warmth.
Feeling like you were going to pass out, you didn’t even hear most of what the crew were saying while they teased you.
You caught yourself doing your happy food wiggle dance, and couldn’t seem to stop, even humming now and then. The crew left the three of you there, and you didn’t hear their goodbyes, just beamed lazily at them.
Sanji brought his plate to the table, and cleared his throat until Zoro begrudgingly scooted over, dragging you with him to make room on the bench. Sanji winked at you before diving into his meal, and you just sat there wiggling, out of your mind.
“I knew you were fuckin’ needy.”
You laughed while Sanji spluttered, and you patted his knee to calm him.
“What do you mean, Zoro,” you smirked up at him, teasing.
“You know what I mean. So fucking spoiled.”
“Don’t listen to him, angel. You deserve to be spoiled, to be-”
Another bout of hysterical laughter left you, and eventually they joined in.
Finally, you gained some control of yourself, and tried to hold a conversation.
“I’m so happy you both chose to stay with me.”
You stopped them both from speaking at the same time, realizing that it would be difficult to get much done with all three of you in a room.
“We definitely need to keep checking in, and figuring out boundaries. I don’t think my brain is up for that today though.”
“What are you up for, my dear?”
“Mm, I like this,” you sighed, rocking back and forth against each of their sides.
You caught Zoro rolling his eyes, and you stuck your tongue out at him.
“What about you guys? Your needs matter too here. What do you need?”
Neither spoke for a minute, and you played with your spoon.
“I guess, um…”
You looked up at Zoro, desperate to hear him actually express his fucking needs.
“How do we figure out time for just us?”
He said those words softly, and you knew how huge it was that he hadn’t said it with anger or frustration. You smiled up at him, then at Sanji who seemed to be waiting with rapt attention.
“Well, we can always check in, and change things if the system isn’t working out. But how about for now we stick to alternating days? Not just for sex, but for our time together?”
They both nodded, Zoro slowly, and Sanji with an eager smile. You squeezed both of their knees before reaching for the last of your mimosa.
You sat back, and they both tilted to see you better. You fought more laughter at what a lovely pair they made.
“Y/N, dear-” “So who-”
They glared at each other, until Sanji did a small mock bow to let Zoro go first.
Zoro’s mouth twitched as he looked away from both of you before continuing. He didn’t meet your gaze when he finished his question.
“Who’s turn is it?”
Your lips parted, and you watched them both look guilty while they waited for you.
This is crazy. How did I manage this?
Zoro cleared his throat, leaning with his elbows over the table.
“Yesterday was supposed to be my day.”
“Technically we didn’t finish my day before that.”
“You’re really gonna pressure her ab-” “You’re the one that’s pressuring her Mari-”
“Technically today was supposed to be Robin’s day.”
Your words shut them both up, and it took way too much effort to hold in your satisfied smile at their expressions.
Zoro looked shocked again, as if he’d blocked that out of his mind. Sanji’s fists had clenched, and you could see the veins in his neck and face throbbing as he turned bright red.
You couldn’t help it. A small laugh escaped you.
“Don’t worry, Robin and I decided to wait on our date until things are settled.”
You could have sworn you heard a tiny whimper from Sanji’s throat.
“How about we start things fresh with a coin toss?”
They both reached for a coin and threw them in the air, calling out the choice. You laughed as they both lost their own tosses.
“Let me do it.”
You’d grabbed Zoro’s coin, and tried to mimic them. You kept throwing it onto the table, or failing to catch it. The coin would drop on your lap, both of them reaching for your thighs to grab it for you, growling as their hands touched.
“Gods, can you guys just agree on which one of you tosses the coin? Pretty please?”
Sanji ended up giving in to your wishes again first, letting the swordsman toss. Then Zoro swore as the coin fell in Sanji’s favor. Sanji kissed your cheek while Zoro left the table after rubbing along your shoulders.
“See ya later, Needy.”
“Wait!”
You rushed over to your surly crewmate. The man who had walked in on you in the shower, and declared that you should fuck. You laughed softly at how crazy your life had been since that moment. And you couldn’t be more grateful for it if you tried.
“What,” he asked, his brows tensing as you laughed.
“It’s nothing,” you whispered, standing on tip toes in a silent request for a kiss.
His look of surprise deepened your smile, and he gripped the hair at the back of your neck when he pulled you to his lips.
A soft cough sounded behind you, and Zoro hummed as he pulled away to smirk at the cook. You nudged him out the door.
Turning around, you saw his eyes wide, waiting. You leaned toward him, feeling his soft lips kiss the corners of your mouth before pulling you into his arms to breathe along your ear.
“All to myself?”
Sanji’s raspy voice made you moan, your body still so ready even with all that had happened. You almost felt high, like all the emotions had left your body buzzing.
You looked up into his soft eyes, watching his lips part when he noticed how heavy your breaths were.
“D-Darling. I didn’t mean… Let me-”
He froze when you gripped his arms to keep him from pulling away.
“I want all sorts of lovely moments with you, Sanji, and I know we’re going to have them.”
The sweet smile that bloomed on his face made your heart dance in your chest for a moment, and you had to take a deep breath.
“I don’t want you to feel bad if we start today where we left off.”
You let heat fill your eyes as you wet your lips. Sanji’s eyes seemed to be pulled to your mouth, and you saw his breath hitch.
“A-Are you sure?”
Grinning at him, you nodded as you bit your lip.
He lunged toward your lips again, but you pressed your hands to his chest.
“Maybe we should go to one of our rooms now that everyone knows?”
You gasped as he looked at you like he was about to eat you.
“That’s too far, sweetheart. How about I take you in the pantry?”
You’d barely breathed out your ‘yes,’ before he lifted you into the air. He pulled you so fast, but still managed to grip you in a way that was comfortable. Your arms and legs wrapped around him, and he groaned while you kissed and licked along his neck.
Setting you gently in the walk in pantry, he held your face while he kissed you before rushing out. You tilted your head after him, but moaned when he returned with a condom and lube. Memories of your first time with him, and the sting and pleasure of his thick cock pulsed through you. Your eyes fell back in your head, and he gave a satisfied chuckle as he turned on the small light before closing the door.
“My sweet, Y/N… How can I show you how special you are to me?”
“You can tell me all the filthy things you want to do to me.”
You pulled your panties off from under your skirt and threw them at his chest.
Sanji had to catch himself against the wall as he moaned, almost dropping the lube.
He already looked wrecked when he met your eyes, and it drove you crazy.
“What do you want to do to me, Sanji?”
He was panting as he watched you pull your skirt up, so slowly. You took the condom and lube from him, and set them on a shelf.
Skin on fire, you didn’t know what had gotten into you. But you wanted him now, and you couldn’t stop yourself. You pressed yourself against his chest, looking into his blown out eyes. Both of you cried out when you dragged your hand along his length, already so fucking hard.
“Sanji, I asked you a question.”
Your words came out soft and dark. You watched his eyes flutter, and you wanted to speed him up. Taking his hand in yours, you whispered his name before pressing his fingers into your wet folds.
He moaned so loud, and your knees went weak. He had to catch you, then he pressed you against the wall, shoving two fingers into you.
“You are so fucking perfect. My sweet, dirty angel.”
Crying out at his praise, your body started shaking for him.
“P-Please, Sanji.”
He rutted against your thigh when you begged, and the feel of his clothed shaft rubbing against you made you whimper.
“I can’t believe you’re letting me do this to you. Such a beautiful, lovely girl. And you’re letting me touch you like this, where anyone could find us.”
He moaned into your ear, breathing in the scent of your hair.
You cried out his name, already feeling on the edge, ready.
“So gorgeous. Let me take care of you, angel. Let me make you feel good.”
“Yes, Sanji, please.”
He fell to his knees with a moan, tasting your needy cunt with that skilled tongue. His two fingers kept up their work while he swirled his tongue ring around your clit.
You had already started shaking before he plunged that third finger into you, and then you were gone. You shoved your own fist into your teeth, and panted as you bucked against Sanji’s face, coming on his tongue.
He licked you up like he was dying of thirst, while his three fingers kept prepping you.
He looked up at you, face glistening in the small light.
“You taste divine, my sweet.”
You moaned as his fingers kept working you.
“It’s probably time for me to prep for lunch, darling.”
You whined, grinding on his fingers.
He groaned, then checked his watch.
“Please Sanji. We’ll have so many more times to play for longer. Please fuck me against the wall right now. I know how much your perverted mind wants you to.”
You moaned as Sanji’s hand twitched inside you, his head falling back as he moaned.
“Please Sanji, I know you’ll take good care of me. Please, please fuck me now. I know you’d love it if someone caught us.”
He fell forward, mouth hanging open as his face pressed against your hip.
He was still taking too long.
You gripped your fingers into his hair, and pulled his face to yours.
“Sanji, are you going to make me beg?”
You watched his eyes harden, and cried out as his long fingers worked you with even more strength.
“A lady always gets what she wants in my kitchen.”
You moaned his name as he stood, kissing his way up your neck.
His fingers left you, and you clung to the wall as you watched him free his cock from his slacks before dragging the condom and lube down his length.
He came toward you, and lifted your leg so that your foot rested on a low shelf. His hands trailed along your neck, then your thighs. Your back arched as he teased his shaft along your entrance, the size of him so warm against you.
“I can’t believe how lucky I am.”
His whispers against your cheek while he dragged his tip along your clit made you shiver for him.
“To have such an exquisite beauty, coming on my face in the pantry.”
You cried out, clawing at his shoulders.
He slapped his thick cock against your entrance a few times while you moaned for him.
“To have such a gorgeous pussy, aching for me to fill it.”
“Fuck, Sanji, please!”
“Of course, darling.”
Biting your lip, your head fell back as you felt him against your center. Not even pressed into you, and your body was readying.
“That’s good, angel. Breathe for me. You know I’ll take care of you.”
You moaned for him, scratching your nails down his striped shirt as he pushed into you, so slowly.
“Gods, Sanji-”
“Shh, darling. Just breathe, and take me, baby. I know you can, you’re so perfect for me.”
Your pussy clenched around him, and he thrust the rest of the way in as he moaned.
“Sweetheart, you okay?”
“Y-Yes, Sanji.”
“Good girl… So perfect.”
As Sanji’s thick cock started pumping into you, slowly, then faster and faster, you forgot where you were, who you were. Just the sharp pain and pleasure of him inside you, and his endless, delectable words were all that held you to reality. His breath was hot on your face and neck as he panted his praise along your skin.
“Y/N, your pussy is fucking heavenly, baby. Fuck. Just like that, I feel you squeezing me so hard. You want my cock inside you, don’t you angel. You want me to make you feel so good, to take care of my perfect girl.”
“Yes, Sanji. Please take care of me.”
He moaned at that, shoving into you, thrusts becoming staggered. He reached down, massaging your clit while you gasped.
“So soft, so good for me…There you go darling- fuck, yes Y/N, milk my cock like a good girl- fuck-”
Sanji came into you with whimpered moans while you shattered around him. He had to hold your slumped body up, gingerly removing himself from you while you cried out.
You whimpered as he pressed soft kisses to your face, before reaching for your panties on the floor. He gave you a satisfied smile as he used them to wipe you clean, before using them to clean himself off after removing that very full condom.
You moaned while you watched him rub your panties on his cock, his eyes heavy lidded even after what you’d just done.
“You’re gonna need to buy me some new panties if you keep taking all of mine.”
His breath came out heavy as he smiled.
“Oh I plan on buying you so many special gifts, my sweet.”
Miraculously, you made it out of the pantry with time to spare, even rushing for a quick shower before heading back to lunch.
Even though it was Sanji’s day, it looked like meals were going to stay a shared time. You sighed as you leaned against Zoro, dampening his shirt with your still wet hair.
“Y/N, do you know if we still have any yarrow? I remember you said it can be used to staunch bleeding, and I’d like to keep some on hand if we run out of our other supplies.”
“Y-Yes Chopper. I believe we do, but I’ll check after lunch.”
I really should get back to work at some point.
But with Zoro’s warmth at your side, and Sanji’s wink while he started on dishes, you weren't sure how you were going to do that.
Especially when you met Robin’s deep blue eyes, and saw her lips curve in that teasing smile.
Who knows the next time we’ll be in danger again? I should enjoy this bliss for as long as I can.
Your selfish little smile at that thought felt oh so good.
I guess I really am Needy after all.
Thank you for reading! 💜
TurtleTaub Fanfic Masterlist
Part 10
Tag List: @astheni-a | @ferns-fics | @heilee | @iamn1ya | @ghostfacefricker6969
A/N: Thank you for reading! Let me know what you think about where things have landed! I know I've been posting daily updates, but I'm visiting family for the next few days so it might be a couple days until the next one. Unless I get bored, I will be bringing a tablet and keyboard with me 😅
Buy me a coffee ☕🙏🏼
#One Piece smut#Reader Insert#Fem!Reader#Smut#mine#Opla smut#zoro smut#zoro x reader#opla zoro x reader#zoro x you#zoro fanfic#zoro fanfiction#sanji smut#sanji x reader#sanji fanfiction#sanji fanfic#x reader#turtletaub fics
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I’ve been too scared to reread rtc to work out what needs to happen in chapter 13 because I convinced myself that the whole fic is a flaming pile of cringey flimsy garbage, but ya know what, I finally gathered the courage to (skim) read it and it’s not as bad as I thought lol. My interpretation and understanding of the characters has changed a lot since I started writing it (thank you to all of the extraordinarily talented writers in this fandom whose works have since shaped my characterisation for the better) so if I could go back, I’d make some different choices. But - and this is me putting this into words in an attempt to convince myself of its truth - this is a hobby, not a test. I’m not a failure because I’m not retroactively meeting the standards I have for my writing today with words I wrote six months ago. Are there bits of clumsy writing and mischaracterisation? Yes, absolutely. Does that mean I’m a bad writer and a bad person who should throw their laptop out the window and never write another word again? Probably not lol, even if rereading that mischaracterisation makes me want to do exactly that.
I’m glad I’ve pulled the bandaid off and reread it, a) because I kinda know what I want to happen in the next chapter now and b) because rereading it, despite the Shame and Embarrassment, reminded me that I actually like writing rtc. Even the bits I cringe at now - I remember having fun writing them. And then I looked back at some comments and remembered how much I love the sense of community that comes with putting myself out there, even though being perceived by others is probably my biggest fear. I like writing, and I like sharing my writing. Why am I letting shame ruin this for myself? I want to stop feeling icky and embarrassed about things I worked hard on.
Anyway. All this to say: I like writing rtc, despite the flaws I see in it, so I need to learn to work through my learned response to imperfection, which is to just feel terrible about it lol. I’m going to start messing around with chapter 13 soon. I really do miss playing around in the rtc world and I’m so excited to show you all what I have planned for the characters <3
#finally doing tumblr right by oversharing like this blog is my diary#I hope this is relatable to at least one (1) person#stop aiming for the unobtainable goal of perfection challenge level: impossible#all of this and I’m still too lazy to actually edit any of it lmao#I think I’ve been more motivated to work on Wishbone because I think it’s an objectively better piece of writing#compared to rtc which I think is patchier#I am so very grateful that people like rtc#we are all just our harshest critics#on the bright side I still think the dinner scene with black and the electrician is one of the funniest things I’ve written lol#‘close your mouth and open your menu’ remains hilarious to me
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Skipped the day yesterday, so I’ll try to reply to more asks today!
Starting with the ones about our LiliSil comic from yesterday…
Anonymous asked:
HOLY SHIT LILIA His thighs are not a snack!
(I would've done the same 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻)
These thighs are a snack much better that whatever Lilia was munching on in a previous comic… leg > spaghett
Anonymous asked:
Silver doesn't get flirting or teasing at all... Very sad..... At least his plump thighs must be super delicious ❤️
He is just way too used to Lilia acting this way I guess… this is like a default to him lol nothing special to see here. But yeah, at least his plump thighs are super delicious 🥰
hipsterteller asked:
I saw silver and lilia…
Ouch, got bonked …
Anonymous asked:
…
I’ll share spaghetti with the old dude. Not because I think he’s hot or anything, mind, but because I’m a pig and spaghetti is spaghetti.
I think this one was sent after the first LiliSil midnight snack comic, so…
Very valid, Anon, but I have to warn you, Lilia is a competitive eater when it’s 3 AM and he’s having cold spaghetti.
Anonymous asked:
Random Ignihyde student A probably: I’m living in an actual nightmare. Royal Sword it is then.
(this is related to this post)
Poor guy, I feel so bad for him, he’s just trying to live his life… these creeps would be happy if he transferred to another school though 😭
Anonymous asked:
Opinions on Idia being fucked in a cosplay?
Or being fucked by someone in a cosplay
Both options are great, and I don’t know which one is going to make Idia die of cringe, embarrassment and arousal faster lol
Whenever this scenario is mentioned, I always think about Lilidia first, since Lilia is kind of a nerd himself + wouldn’t mind dressing up. In fact I did draw this once, if you consider a maid outfit a cosplay… we might revisit the theme of cosplay in Idia smut sometime, it’s a very fun one.
Idia desperately needs to get fucked in a cosplay, that’s for sure.
Anonymous asked:
haha funny scenario :)
ok now actually draw idia whimpering and bleeding on the floor :))
:) Come on, Anon, why would I do something so mean to Idia? This isn’t like me at all, I would never.
Anonymous asked:
Good lord, thank you for the dark, twisted food you’ve been providing us in the way of headcanons. I’m drinking them in like water y’all. 😩
Thank you so much for enjoying them, Anon! <3 I am super happy to hear that you like them.
I really hope to finish the rest of the posts about darker themes and hcs soon; it’s truly amazing that people are interested enough to ask for more of that.
Dark and twisted food is our true passion 😔💕
Anonymous asked:
i NEED to breed those eels 😭🤚
Unfortunately, in this blog the eels are busy breeding Idia…
Anonymous asked:
Do ya think that in the heat of the moment Sebek would try to breed Malleus, not knowing , or forgetting) that it doesn't work like that (unless it's A/B/O haha) ? Like he'd get SO intense that even AFTER he'll finish inside his liege he'd get excited again from the thought of his liege carrying his- THEIR children.
I think the young hormonal horny fae part of Sebek’s brain could make him believe in anything, like if his instincts win over and his confused body just goes ballistic, which is very likely to happen if he is lucky enough to have any kind of intimacy with Malleus. But this is Sebek we’re talking about; it could go either way with him.
Then again, we did have a comic about Sebek bragging about being the one to breed his liege, so maybe he doesn’t even need to be in the heat of the moment to think about this type of thing. It’ll definitely get him excited in like 2 seconds though lol
Anonymous asked:
I headcanon that the Science Club members talk crap and gossip while doing their club activities. Kinda like stylists at a salon but meaner.
I think every club does that to an extent lol, Science Club too. Is there a reason you headcanon them specifically as being gossipers?
All of them talking shit about everyone… and then there’s Rook with his singing….
Anonymous asked:
Kuro x TWST au where Riddle is Ciel's cousin who goes to live with Madame Red and Grell after his OB. Skip ahead and Riddle is introducing Floyd to his family. Madame Red doesn't think highly of him but he makes Riddle happy so she doesn't protest. Sebastian and the tweels are three pees in a pod, so only a raised eyebrow and approval. Ciel tho goes full kink shaming. He cannot believe his most esteemed respected favorite cousin is not only a monsterfucker but also into THAT sort of personality
Come on, Ciel, you shouldn’t be judgmental, just look at your butler for fuck’s sake lol Plus, it’s difficult for Riddle too! He wants Floyd to behave properly, it’s not his fault he can’t…
I hope the tweels bully Ciel lol
This is one of those moments when I really regret Yana not being able to do a proper crossover between Kuro and Twst, all of these boys interacting would’ve been so interesting.
artfulhero-m asked:
It's been a little over a week since I sent that huge ass essay, and in the spirit of being extremely happy to be a cringe weird little freak, have you heard of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley? I literally heard about it weeks ago cause I heard it's what the Internet has considered "the incest game" so because of that, and the cute art of the game, I bought it weeks ago and finally got around to playing it and oh boy yeah the incest is very throughout the game. AND IT'S AMAZING >:) Literally the most toxic of sibling relationships, but like that's what's got my brain latching hard they're SO codependent on each other.
Sorry I just needed another moment to just kinda yell into the void in your ask box again if that's okay lol. After sending that essay last week while on the verge of passing out for the night not even 100% sure I sent it to the right ask box I just immediately got sick the next day, which took me out for the entire week lmao. Then halfway through the week I figured I was done with sleeping so the stars have finally aligned for me to play "the incest game" and now the brain rot for The Coffin of Andy and Leyley is kinda severe and only getting worse so as a result, just needed to know if you heard about it too lol.
Yeah, we’ve heard about the game! At some point it became impossible to avoid, and while we haven’t played or watched it, the discourse around it is fascinating and very telling. We are just very happy in general that the game exists, and not necessarily because of incest, but because it’s always cool to see games with darker and more problematic themes getting popularity and recognition, especially if this is the game where the main characters are kind of shitty people lol And the artstyle is cute, I agree! It’s such a pity the author got harassed, I hope it didn’t affect them in any way.
All of that being said, I hope you get good rest and have a good sleep every day. I know it’s easier said than done, but please take care of yourself, this is very important. I also hope you feel better and surround yourself with fictional toxicity only lol Enjoy your problematic brainrot.
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Could you write a Galadriel/Celeborn piece about them in Doriath with supportive Lúthien and Melian? (Also I really liked your sympathetic Thingol piece!)
Sure I can! (I can write anything! Proven with that Glorfindel/Balrog piece I can never unsee.)
I have a soft spot for Celeborn–you know it, I know it, his wife knows it (gave me the title of Homewrecker of Lorien, you know). But, because I love Elrond/Celebrian so much, and I know there’s no Celebrian without Celeborn/Galadriel, I guess I’ll go with a schmoopy romancey story for them. Anyhow, I tend to go with a timid Doriath Celeborn with a stutter when he’s nervous, and that is who showed up for the muse casting call today. Enjoy! (Also, no wonder we don’t get Sindarin version of Nerwen from Tolkien – Nerwen was bad enough. Read on…)
---
“Good afternoon, Celeborn.”
“Good afternoon, Princess Luthien.”
The two happened to come around the same corner of one of the florist stalls set up in the courtyard market. Walking in opposite directions, Celeborn was intently inspecting the blooms in the baskets that lined the stall; he would have walked right into Luthien, had she not been the more attentive of the two and stepped safely aside.
“I see you have selected some of the more vibrant flowers they have here today. What is the occasion?” asked Luthien.
Celeborn tried not to blush, and failed miserably. “I happen...to have...a meeting tonight...with a friend...for dinner.” The words stuttered out, each phrase from the young scribe a little softer than the former.
Luthien smiled. “It must be a special dinner if you are bringing flowers. Or are you hosting a party?”
Celeborn shook his head. “N-no. No party. Just myself...and a...friend.”
Luthien leaned down to sniff one of the orchids Celeborn was clutching. He had also selected lilies and hydrangeas. “Your friend must like large flowers.”
“I...do not...know?” He bit his lip and looked down shyly. “Truth told,” he whispered, “this is more of a…social engagement…of a…romantic nature.”
“And you have chosen orchids?” wondered Luthien. “She must like the bright and the bold.”
Again, Celeborn chewed at his lip. “I am not...not sure?” His shoulders slumped and he whispered, “I am doing my best. I d-do not have a sister, and m-my brother said I am...reaching...too high.”
Luthien stepped beside Celeborn and placed her hands on his shoulders. “I have an idea! I can help you shop! I have no brother, so this will be fun–for both of us! Of course, you will have to tell me who she is, so I can help.”
Red flushed Celeborn’s cheeks again. “She is j-just about the prettiest g-girl I have ever seen.” He swallowed audibly. “D-do you know Princess Dirgwend of N-nargothrond?”
“Oh, yes!” Immediately Luthien cringed and looked over the flowers Celeborn was clutching. “Oh, no.”
“N-n-n-n-no?” Celeborn frowned. “You think I am t-t-too far b-beneath her, too?”
“No! I think, honestly, you are such a gentle person, and thoughtful, and kind, and brilliant–because she is as sharp as a hound’s tooth–I think she is lovely and you would be a lovely match!” Luthien grimaced and slowly extracted a hydrangea from Celeborn. “Ah, this, though…” She caught sight of someone in the crowd and lifted the hydrangea above her head. “Ulli!”
Melian was only five or six meters away, and smiled at her daughter, standing beside the youngest of the library scribes.
“Ulli, akaeί akablanditiae tαdιχαόου mūαtheteυόmūeνος” called out Luthien.
“Oh!” Melian approached with a approving look on her face.
Luthien held up one of the flowers. “akaόχοtte akadίν aū iniðel”
“Ooooh.” Melian clasped her hands together and slowed her steps as she approached. “I seeeeee.” She stopped in front of them and appeared to analyze each flower separately. “May I safely assume this is your first time arranging flowers?”
“Y-yes, your majesty.”
“And may I safely assume you wish to make a positive impression on our visiting diplomat?”
Celeborn nodded. “I need help,” he said sadly.
Luthien was already pulling the bountiful bouquet from his hands. “Are you familiar with roses, Celeborn? I believe I saw some lovely peach and pale pink varieties around the corner.”
Artanis calmly picked up her gloves from the desk as she heard the knock upon her door. She made sure to have them on and took one more look at her hair in the mirror and waited a moment more until there was a second knock before she opened the door.
Before her stood Celeborn, holding an exquisite collection of roses, carnations, and delicate buds, a swirl of white and pastels. He held them out to her. “Good evening. May I...present you with this...small token of affection?”
With lips pressed together to mute her grin, Artanis took the flowers and sniffed them experimentally. “These are lovely.”
“I picked them out m-myself,” he said, and then added, “With help...f-from some…f-friends.”
Artanis sniffed them again to hide her next smile. “My brother always says it is a wise man who knows when to ask for aid.” She peered over the flowers at the tall, lanky scholar who was trying not to appear nervous, but the fidgeting of his hands while they were hidden in his sleeves gave him away.
Yes, he was as sweet as Luthien had said, and as kind as Melian told her. Her brother had hinted to her that while his time in Middle-earth would be one of solitude, that he did not see that for her, but no suitor would she find in Nargothrond. It was part of why Artanis chose to spend so much time in Doriath (though her studies more than filled most of the time).
There were many occasions when Artanis had asked for assistance from Celeborn when she visited the library. There were many scribes there, all willing to help, but something seemed to draw her instead to the shy one who insisted on carrying books for her, holding the door, or retrieving more ink for her any time the well ran dry.
She still played coy when he finally gathered the courage to ask her to dine with him. He nearly took it as a rejection, the poor dear. She decided he deserved a token himself, for his good behavior. “Would you like to come in while I put these in a vase?”
“Yes, I would. Th-that would be very kind of you,” said Celeborn.
Yet he remained standing on the doormat while Artanis walked to a cabinet. “Are you going to come in, then?” she asked.
“Y-you only asked if I should like to. I did not...wish to...assume.”
Artanis smiled with her back turned. “You may come in, if you like.”
Celeborn took a deep breath and stepped just inside of the suite.
Artanis turned, and studied him with amusement as she carried the vase with the flowers to a table. “You have chosen to leave the door open,” she observed.
Celeborn gave a quick nod, and said, “I shall not have anyone question your honor, and so, in-in lieu of a chaperone, I f-feel it appropriate.”
The vase was placed on the table. While Finrod had encouraged her to seek out true love, her other brothers seemed wary that she might become entangled with a less than savory courier in the kingdom. Celeborn was clearly anything but. He would more than do.
“Shall we dine?” asked Artanis as she came to stand beside Celeborn.
He offered her his arm, which she took, and after the door was closed, the two walked down the hallway together, both a little nervous, both a little excited, neither noticing Luthien spying from around the corner.
--
Notes:
I had to fuss around with Valarin, mainly ‘making shit up’, because if you think that Khuzdul and the Black Speech are limited, you haven’t met fucking Valarin yet.
I put my research goggles on, found references about Valarin being a sexy mix of Latin and Greek, so I came up with some words for Luthien and Luthien’s mom.
Ulluiός : Water Parent (I didn’t think Luthie would be using ‘mom’ and ‘dad’. I also thought about it, and with how the Ainur are, even the mom and dad thing seems not quite right. So I came up with this concept of, there’s a water parent, and a fire parent. In this case, Melian was the water parent.)
Of course we can’t have Luthien using the full ass version, so ‘Ulli!’ sounds way more like a title an Ainu kid would call their parent.
There are two sentences, and before we get to the ‘what is it supposed to mean’, I have a lot of thoughts about Valarin, and how the sentences are open ended at the start and end, that the Song of Creation at the beginning of the legendarium is a loop, and that language for the Ainur is woven in and out of the song, and there’s no capitalization unless the first word is a proper noun and there’s no punctuation unless there is a question but that does not mean the question mark has to go at the end. A little language chaos. So! Now that you know that, here’s those two sentences, keeping in mind, I spent more time figuring out these two sentences than I did the rest of the story, and yes, it’s shit I made up because Tolkien didn’t leave us a lot of Valarin words, and what he did leave is shit he made up. So let’s all go make up some Valarin words mashing Greek and Latin together until it sounds good or at least looks impressive enough to be spoken by the Valar.
akaeί akablanditiae tαdιχαόου mūαtheteυόmūeνος - Celeborn is courting your apprentice
akaόχοtte akadίν aū iniðel - He intends to give her lilies
And I find it perfectly reasonable that Luthien shouts this across a market to her mom because the two of them are the only two people who can speak the language who are in that vicinity.
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I Watched All of Doctor Who Series 1/Series 14 Today
I kinda thought it'd be fun to watch the entire series in one day instead of watching weekly AND I WAS RIGHT. IT WAS FUN. I muted lots of words across social media and managed to remain unspoiled so I got to just experience the series without any expectations. Would recommend as a way to experience the show, free of fandom nonsense and having no idea what might happen. OK SO. BRIEF THOUGHTS ON EACH EPISODE BELOW THE CUT. (Also for the record, I dropped off Doctor Who in Peter Capaldi's early episodes and then only tuned back in for David Tennant's specials last year. So I might be missing some stuff that is important? idk.)
Gonna assign each episode a letter grade because why not?
Space Babies (C) - The way things were explained made it SO obvious that they wanted this episode to serve as an introduction to completely new viewers. Which... fair enough. As a whole the episode was meh. I did like the Bogeyman made of literal bogeys, but "Babies Can Talk!" humor is not my cup of tea. Wouldn't choose to rewatch this any time soon.
The Devil's Chord (B) - A solid Monster of the Week type episode. The fashion was ON POINT and I like the idea of the importance of music to humanity. But the musical finale number was cringe and just not a good song so... docking points.
Boom (D) - I swear I tried to not have my pre-conceived Moffat hating influence me, but like this was a bad episode? It just WAS. SORRY. It was boring and SO heavy handed and the episode's pacing felt glacial. Only saving grace was Ncuti's acting, tbh.
73 Yards (A+) - UM WOW. I think the last time I felt this way about an episode of Doctor Who was like... Midnight? And I think the vibes of Midnight and 73 Yards are similar in that it's a simple thing that is VERY creepy. (The repeating voice vs a figure that stays exactly 73 yards away, always.) And the way Ruby used her to end the evil PM. AMAZING. Can I explain the time travel/time loop/time lines of it all? No. Do I care? Also no.
Dot and Bubble (A) - I LOVED the way this episode played against expectations. You expect it to be like: Lindy is a shallow person wrapped up in the virtual world but learns to engage with reality and become a hero. But like, no. She manages to survive, but she sucks, lmao. And all the people in her world suck. It was a twist that didn't feel unearned (I think the whiteness of everyone on the social media platform is a giant neon sign pointing to the ending) and also made the episode memorable.
Rogue (A-) -What a FUN episode. Absolutely CLASSIC episodic monster story. Also a 'single episode romance that ends tragically' for the Doctor isn't new, but the romance being a man was a good change to make it feel fresh. My only complaint is that it felt like Ruby was a bit too sidelined and in such a short season it feels like every moment she's not on screen is wasting the limited time we have to get to know her.
The Legend of Ruby Sunday (B+) - A decent episode and it was fun to see Rose, Kate and Mel again. The S Triad mystery was also pretty intriguing. (I was convinced for a while that Susan was actually a anthromorphized TARDIS who somehow went evil.) However, the episode relied way too much on handwaving technology stuff with the Time Window that I just did not get.
Empire of Death (A-) - Satisfying conclusion to the Sutekh stuff anchored by a really great performance from Ncuti. The reveal of Ruby's mom just being... an ordinary person was great. She was only significant because people imbued her with significance. We create meaning out of things that maybe don't have meaning. Also nice change of pace from characters needing to be The Most Special Being Ever.
Overall thoughts: The shortened season was a major bummer. I think it robbed us of more of the filler type episodes that can do a lot to build the Doctor and Companion characters and also develop the bond between them. So like... only having 8 episodes with them made the final episode feel kinda unearned?? I think we needed more time seeing them being bestie for their goodbye scene to feel believable. In spite of that, Millie was completely charming as Ruby and Ncuti was a powerhouse of an actor. An excellent Doctor!
WELCOME BACK RTD DOCTOR WHO!
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here is the spotify link to Robin and Steve's Epic Platonic Soulmate Mixtape (vol.1) I'm going to say they made this version in the early spring of 1985. fic link
track list and explanations under the cut!!
Side A--the queer side
Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler: I'm gonna take a wild guess and say y'all know why this is here
Rainbow Connection by Kermit: also self explanatory. and a bop. AND about rainbows. what more could you want?
Bangkok/One Night in Bangkok by Murray Head (Original Chess Recording version): 1) a banger. 2) from a whole musical written by the Bs of ABBA 3) Steve likes to listen to musical while vacuuming his pool :) 4) queer vibes. "the queens we use would not excite you" "i get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine" also to note they DID probably shave off the first minute of instrumental, but not all of it. I used this version and not the radio edit because in my heart of hearts I believe Steve picked up the Chess concept album in the fall of 1984, vibed with it, (I've answered an ask about stobin and the musical chess where I talk more) and that's the version he has.
Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy by Queen: tbh always sounded gay to me, and it's such a fun song, I think they'd vibe with it and agreed it's a silly little nod to steve's previous rep.
Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard by Paul Simon: GAY GAY VERY GAY SONG "it's against the law...what their mama saw/it was against the law" HMM also it's catchy and has so much potential to be an angsty queer ballad too. (also Robin's dad is 100% a Simon and Garfunkle stan that's just. a fact to me.)
I'm Coiming Out by Diana Ross: iconic song claimed by the gays. for the obvious reasons. bit on the nose but this is for THEM.
Sunshine (Go Away Today) by Jonathan Edwards: About not letting someone control your life. It's catchy and heartfelt, dreams about the future. Steve's Vecna Song for me.
You Can't Hurry Love by The Supremes: stobin are losers in the love department, and it's a great and hopeful song about not rushing into things. The Supremes Version because Robin is influenced by her former Hippie parents, and Steve by his Aunt Evelyn and her love of 50's and 60's music. They have appreciation for the Oldie Goldies.
Lady Marmalade by LaBelle: Disco baby. I also feel this was a song for us queer folk. maybe because I'm queer and I like it. it's great, and robin loves hearing women sing about having sex.
Holding Out for a Hero by Bonnie Tyler: throwback to the first song on the mixtape Steve gave Robin at the very beginning! now with the Upside Down between them it means more too. it's also SO FUN to belt in the car. frantic and with a good beat. I don't think I need to justify this one haha
Believe it or Not (theme from Greatest American Hero) by Joey Scarbury: Robin LOVES this stupid show about a cringe fail teacher with his cringe fail life getting a super suit from aliens and then losing the instruction manual. It just feels like a show she'd like even though it's so silly. The theme song is actually great tho. I think it'd really tickle the part of Robin that feels overly average and a bit trapped in Hawkins, but feels those confines lessen when she's with Steve and getting to feel like there's more out there for her. Personally, I first heard it on cassette of top 100 tv themes (along with MASH, Law and Order, Hawaii Five-oh, Andy Griffith etc) sitting in a booster seat in the front seat of my family's motor home on a long summer road trip in the early 2000's, as my dad drove and told me what show each song was from. (Steve buddy I understand your dream so much ok. There's nothing quite like being a kid and going on a roadtrip with your family. magical.)
Side B--The Besties side
You're My Best Friend by Queen: Love song for your best friend me thinks yes :)
Stuck With You by Huey Lewis and the News: the only anachronistic song on the playlist, but I couldn't NOT put it on. lavender marriage stobin REAL. They're stuck with each other :) also look at Steve. He is a guy who listens to Huey Lewis. We know this. He heard this song a year before it came out and was like robin :') it's us....I'm stuck with you...I'm so Happy about it :))
Stoned Soul Picnic by The 5th Dimension: Robin's parents are former hippies. This song is fantastic. Pure vibes. Steve and Robin are going to get rescue cats that are bonded together and name them Sassafras and Moonshine for this song.
Video Killed the Radio Star by The Buggles: Bop and a half. Sing along song.
Both Sides Now by Judy Collins: 1)gorgeous song originally by Joni Mitchel but this version is a bit faster 2) Robin's former Hippie parents influencing her taste strike AGAIN 3) she tries to convince Steve it's about being "queer like him" and he doesn't buy it but "I've looked at love from both sides now/.../I really don't know love at all" and "Oh, but now old friends they're acting strange/ And they shake their heads and they tell me that I've changed/ Well something's lost, but something's gained" hit different for him
Only the Good Die Young by Billy Joel: I chose this billy joel song because it's 1) catchy as all hell 2) about having sex 3) mentions dying and stobin are like We didn't die!! hell yeah! Steve's a pianist and tbh he loves billy joel. who doesn't. it was between this one and piano man i guess, tho i love many Billy Joel songs that are "deeper cuts" ha. and "I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints/the sinners are much more fun" line is like. what are they gonna do. not be an emotional queer teen about it?
Raspberry Beret by Prince: it's catchy, and whilst originally I had put La La Love You By Don McLean here, I like this one better. Robin is definitely a Prince fan. and a beret fan. happy coincidink. and its a fun song! about loosing your virginity to a hot girl in a barn!
Indiana Wants Me by R. Dean Taylor: okay originally I'll admit I put this on the masterplaylist because. obviously post-s4 Eddie running away angst song even if it's more folk-rock than metal. I think Steve and Robin would listen to it and really vibe with wanting to go home but not being able to. even if it's not literally. also they live in Indiana and like. you've gotta respect a song about where you live. ALSO the cop sounds in it. so good.
Born in the USA by Bruce Springsteen: a song? about being disillusioned with the American dream after seeing the institutional failures of the government??? very Steve. the whole album is great, and I know I've reblogged a post about Steve and the album (My Hometown hits different). It's angry, frustrated, passionate. Being queer in a small town where the government covers up it's human experimentation and alternate dimensions probably makes you feel a lot of things. All with the veneer of Americana.
Where Do You Go To (My Lovely) by Peter Starstedt: purely self indulgent of me. I adore this song. I think Steve heard it, and thought of Robin. The remembering, the deep knowledge of another person, the longing. When he told Robin that it's a song he always associates with her she tears up a bit, because it's so tender and loving, and a bit silly. Like. Steve knows she'll be amazing and can't comprehend anyone not seeing it. It's sooo tender.
Thank You for Being a Friend by Andrew Gold: Golden Girls didn't air their first episode until fall 1985, and obviously when it does Stobin are loyal viewers, (Steve is in love with Bea Arthur. as is right) but this song came out in the 70's. It's fun and cute and catchy! They love each other and are so, incomprehensibly grateful that they found each other.
#stobin#platonic stobin#RaSEPSM#stranger things#robin buckley#steve harrington#stranger things au#playlist#finda's rambles#finda writes stuff#im so mad i can't find the steve and born in the usa post. what the fuck. if anyone knows what im talking about please send it to me
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Hi! Late to the writing rq'ing party probably because I'm Nervous tm but if its cool to ask for VE as well, can I ask for little Murrit and little Dismas, maybe destressing together after a rough day? I hc Murrit really likes bunnies and Dismas loves dragons, I think they'd like to share their plushies with each other. :}
-comfybuckets
AAA OMG!!! u are one of my fav ao3 authors !! i literally luv ur work so much, its actually what originally got me into ve !!! :D
i really hope u like this! its loosely based off of some of ur fics lol but yeaaa ! <3 <3
also lil warning there is some cussing in this btw !
Dismas’s day had been awful.
He had been running from his lusus all day, finally taking refuge in a small cavern situated near his hive. It was just deep enough that the troll could hide in it without being spotted. He sat on the ground, trying to catch his breath and calm himself down. Small scratches covered Dismas’s body from falling earlier, but other than that, he was okay.
The troll was just so, so tired. Tired from running, tired from the constant fear and adrenaline running in his body, tired of the stupid skulltitan that was always hunting him down. He wanted nothing more than to be somewhere soft, welcoming, and comforting. Somewhere familiar, somewhere that wasn’t here.
As much as he pained to admit it, he wanted to be with his kismesis. He missed Murrit, with his stupid endearing smile and his stupid comforting hive.
While adult Dismas wanted to pretend like he didn’t need the other, little Dizzy just wanted to curl up in Murrit’s arms and cry, letting out his fear and frustration. He learned a while ago that the other troll had a surprising soft side that not many got to see often. A side that was really only meant for little Dizzy to see.
Dismas huffed, pulling out his phone from his pant’s pocket. He opens Skorp, and after a moment of hesitation, he begins to message Murrit.
gigantisDebilitation [GD] began trolling unclaspedKahuna [UK] at 6:37 PM
GD: Hey///
GD: /\re you /\t your hive?///
UK: >([ya w#at do u want]
GD: C/\n I come over?///
UK: >([i mean yea sure y t#o?]
UK: >([r u like? ok? srsly?]
GD: Ye/\h just///
GD: I need to get /\w/\y for /\ bit///
The troll cringed at his own message. What he really wanted to say was, “Hey, I really need to get away from this stupid fucking lizard and be small with you, please let me come over”, but Dismas knew he couldn’t send that. That would definitely freak Murrit out.
He takes another breath, quickly typing out another message before Murrit could respond to his last.
GD: My d/\y h/\s just been re/\lly b/\d /\nd I need some time to regress///
GD: /\nd I’d r/\ther do it with you///
GD: If th/\t’s ok/\y///
Dismas internally kicks himself. He really hopes Murrit doesn’t say anything about how desperate he sounded to come over.
UK: >([tb# ive felt p itty bity 2 today]
UK: >([so ya come over n we can c#ill]
UK: >([we can b small toget#errr lolol]
GD: Ok/\y///
gigantisDebilitation [GD] gave up trolling unclaspedKahuna [UK] at 6:51 PM
The troll lets out a sigh of relief. With only minimal grunting, Dismas got up from his spot and headed towards his hive to grab his spare go bag, which was home to all his little supplies.
His body aches as he runs, but he knows it’ll be worth it if he can just get to Murrit’s house.
…
Murrit’s head hurt. A lot.
As much as she’d like to record the fight between shitlizard and Dismas, she really didn’t feel like it. The whole “fun exploitation theatrics” wasn’t sitting right with Murrit today, for some odd reason. Something about it made their stomach hurt, whether it was from the guilt or the blood, he wasn’t sure.
Still, they sat at their desk, staring at the screens in front of her. Her eyes burned from looking into them, studying them intently. He didn’t sleep the night before, just glaring blindly at the monitors until his vision went blurry. Despite how they acted, they really did care for their friends. That’s why she had to stay up, to make sure they all stay safe.
Especially Dismas, but he ignores that thought. She could only watch so much of today’s brawl before she switched to watching another camera, one that didn’t include her kismesis. They couldn’t do it today.
He just felt so off, like he wasn’t in his own body. Everything she did felt like she was puppeteering someone else into acting like a normal troll, but they weren’t a normal troll. He felt so small, smaller than he should. Sometimes it scared him when he got like this. It’s scary to go through… whatever this is alone. Some of his other friends had explained it to her before, saying that they went through it also. Something to do with trauma, or stress, or maybe both? She wasn’t sure, her head wasn't thinking straight.
But, even if being… small? Yes, that’s the word. If being small was scary, it wasn’t scary with Dismas or Albion or Sova. They all made things right, they made her feel right.
He… he missed Dismas a lot right now. That’s why whenever the other had messaged him about coming over for some time to destress, of course she said yes. How could she not? She needed this as much as he did, and if they had to do it together, then they would.
They can’t remember a time where she and Dismas had fallen into that headspace together. He doesn’t think they have done that before. It should be ok, right?
Murrit was doubting themselves. Her head is hurting badly now, the pounding of the migraine overtaking her thoughts. She lays her head down on the desk, closing his eyes to try to calm down. He couldn’t bring himself to move and get his medication, so this would have to do.
Breathe in, breathe out. It’s ok, you’re ok, Dizzy is on his way. He can help.
They stayed like that for a while, eyes screwed shut to keep out any light that was coming from the computer screens, head resting on the desk. He was finally starting to calm himself down before Dismas arrived. They’d hate to put any more stress on the other troll by freaking out once he got here.
After a while, Murrit hears a knock at the door, causing the troll to jump in her seat. He gets up too fast, almost tripping on the way to unlock the door to their hive.
As soon as the door is opened, Dismas stumbles into Murrit, wrapping his arms tightly around the other to encase her in a hug. Murrit hugs the other back, holding him gently. He was shaking, and even though no noise was escaping the boy, they could tell he was crying. Murrit tightens the hug, holding Dizzy close and allowing the other to sob into her shoulder. Murry had started to let her own tears fall, mostly out of relief that Dizzy was here, but some out of pain. Their migraine had gotten really bad, their head throbbing from every quiet cry she had let out.
The two sat like that for a while, crying and holding each other to comfort one another. It wasn’t until their sobs had quieted when they pulled away. Dizzy looked… bad. Some of his clothes were ripped up, his bandana falling down his face, his hair sticking up in every other direction. There was still fear in his eyes from earlier. He was clutching his overnight bag like it was a lifeline, like he was afraid he would lose it if he let go.
Murry didn’t look any better. His hair was a curly mess, his eye bags extremely prominent from the lack of sleep. Tears streaked her face, much like Dizzy’s. There was fear in her eyes as well, but not the same as Dizzy’s. Their fear was from being vulnerable, being in that headspace around others, a fear that they still hadn’t conquered.
Dizzy moves his bandana back up his face and asks “Uh… you okay?” His voice was low and quiet, and he spoke carefully as if he was still figuring out which words meant what. Murry starts to nod, before stopping himself. They shook their head slowly, a guilty look covering her face.
“Me too”, Dizzy says. ���S’ okay, though. We can just… just relax today.” Murry hums in agreement.
Dizzy looked around Murry’s hive, it was extremely hard considering how dark it was. He squinted to see the room was covered in dirty clothes, loose papers, unused electrical wiring. Despite how messy it was, it was oddly comforting to the troll. The mess showed that it was lived in, specifically by Murrit. It was kind of nice.
The younger of the two holds out her hand to Dizzy, silently asking him to take it. The older drops his bag first and then takes their hand, leading Murry throughout their own hive. Her other hand was twisted into her shirt, holding onto it for dear life. It was something Dizzy had noticed they did whenever they were nervous. He was confused about why Murry was so nervous, but didn’t say anything. They could always talk about it later, after all.
Murry lets out a quiet whine as the two are walking through the messy hive. Dizzy turns around to check on the other, only to find that the other troll’s eyes are screwed shut in pain. They moved their free hand from their shirt to their head, his palm pressed against his forehead.
“What’s wrong?” Dizzy asks, concerned.
Murry whines again, saying “Mm…m’ head hurts”. Dizzy frowns, ultimately deciding that their mission right now would be to go find some medicine for Murry.
The older troll squeezes Murry’s hand, then begins to lead him to the bathroom. Dizzy had been here enough times to know how to navigate through the other’s hive, even if he was feeling little and his thinkpan wasn’t working at full capacity.
He quickly found Murry’s migraine relief meds in the bathroom cabinet, only struggling a little with the child-proof cap. He hands the other regressor the pill, who just looks up at Dizzy and frowns.
“Drink”, they state, holding the pill in their first up to Dizzy.
“Oh, okay”, the older says. They head for the kitchen, with Dizzy almost tripping on a random pile of keyboards only once. He heads for the cabinets, grabbing Murry’s purple sippy cup. He smiled fondly behind his bandana, remembering how Albion had gifted this to him. She had gotten Dizzy one similar to Murry’s, except his was orange.
He fills the little’s cup with water and hands it back to her. Murry makes a face before taking the pill, gulping down most of the water in the cup afterwards.
“What do you wanna do now?” Dizzy questions.
“Play?” Murry quietly suggests, holding his sippy back to his mouth again. He takes a few more sips, finishing the water completely and setting the cup back in the sink.
“Yeah!” the other troll agrees, running back into the other room to retrieve his bag. Murry begins to follow along before stopping once they see Dizzy running back into the kitchen. He excitedly runs back to Murry, his bag in hand.
Dizzy kneels on the floor and opens the duffle, and Murry peeks inside. He sees extra clothes, some toys, a plushie, and some other plastic, brightly colored things that Murry thinks are pacifiers and teethers. Murry joins the other on the floor, rocking back and forth as he waits for Dizzy to find whatever he was searching for.
“Murry! Look!” Dizzy exclaims, pulling out the plushie. It was a cream-colored dragon with orange eyes. The plush looks extremely squishable and soft. The dragon was in a laying down position, the kind that dogs do whenever they want to play. Murry guesses this was how the dragon let other stuffed animals know that it wanted to play, too.
The younger smiles, reaching out a hand to pet Dizzy’s comfort item. She was right, he was soft!
“Have a plush, too!” Murry says, and gets up off the floor to run to their room. Dizzy follows behind her with his dragon in hand.
Once they reach the bedroom, Murry digs through his closet to find his friend. They eventually pull out a lavender bunny plush that resembled a lionhead rabbit. It was old, like Murry had had it since she was a hatchling. Her plushie was very fluffy, it looked just as soft as Dizzy’s dragon.
The troll pushes out the bunny for Dizzy to feel. He hesitates before sticking out his hand, petting the other’s very loved stuffed animal. Even if you couldn’t see his mouth, you could tell Dizzy was smiling. Murry was smiling right back at him, a soft laugh escaping her mouth.
The two situate themselves on the floor and begin to play, each coming up with ridiculous and impractical adventures for their little friends to go on. The bunny and dragon had become friends after the dragon had almost eaten Mr. Bunny, and now they were to travel the world together!
Murry could feel their headache melt away with all the fun they were having together. Dizzy did most of the talking, putting on silly voices for his dragon and the other people they had come across on their escapades. Murry would hum or laugh, sometimes making Mr. Bunny talk. The other regressor didn’t seem to mind how quiet Murry was, being that Dizzy could probably talk for the both of them currently.
‘We should regress together more often’, Dizzy thinks, and judging by Murry’s bright smile as they continue to play, she thought the same thing.
#emmy talks#asks#ve agere#murrit turkin#dismas mersiv#WAHH omg#i think ive read ur lil sova and lil murry fic like 12 actual times lol#<3<3<3#i luv it sm#also srry if this is bad hehdjdjd i’ve been super sleepy recently#fandom agere#also i’ll b posting this to ao3 so the skorplogs will look a million times better like usual lols !#vast error agere#my work!
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so im easing back into writing after my break, bear with me! have some fic ideas and im gonna keep working on my aces series and also start posting my until the end of time series (super excited about that one hehe)
but i present in the mean time:
my top 10 underrated kpop bsides (in my opinion)
1. novel by skz - ik it's a japanese comeback so it's kind of different, but even so, this song is SO pretty (i listened to it while snow was falling at a christmas market in the city today and WOW that was probably one of my fav music experiences and the entire song literally feels like that situation)
2. brave by twice - honestly i love basically every bside in this album but THIS (and basics, but that's not underrated and definitely should not be bc it's iconic) is one of my favs. something about it just clicks in my brain?? idk go listen to it
3. telepathy by bts - this one is SO CUTE and my mum introduced me to it <3 it's her fav bc it's so sweet and i love love love the rhythm?? like idk again it just is one of those songs that WORKS and the harmonies are so pretty and it's just fun and cute and everything
4. psychic lover/snowy/freaky by itzy (shut up ik it's more than one) - OKAY SO ive always found itzy bsides kind of mid (DONT come at me i love those girls okay but idk i feel like jyp really isn't using their talents well enough like PLS give my girl ryu better rap lines?? WHY ARE THEY JUST TALKIBG HELP SHE CAN HANDLE THEM) but the cheshire mini album ATE (boys like you gets a half point bc i liked the instrumental even tho the lyrics were cringe) and kill my doubt WAS the bside album of itzy (shame that i didn't like the title track anywhere near as much tho) so basically yeah they have a few good recent bsides i adore is what im tryna say
5. rewind by twice - okay so as much as i adore twice i feel like their bsides are either a) SLAPPING INCREDIHLE MWAH or b) what the fuck are you doing here?? like you're lowkey in the wrong place darling!! like can someone explain to me WHY moonlight ended up in the scientist album and NOT taste of like love??? excuse me??? and im seeing that none of this is about rewind but idk anymore i need to do a post where i sort out bsides from different itzy and twice albums into their CORRECT ONES BECAUSE WHY IS WILD WILD WEST IN GUESS WHO AND NOT IN NOT SHY THAT WAS THEIR WHOLE COWBOY CONCEPT STFU
6. love maze by bts
7. blind spot by skz
8. cool (your rainbow) by nmixx
9. girls like us by twice
10. love by stayc
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Album Review of the Week: The Righteous Brothers - Just Once In My Life (1965)
The Righteous Brothers have always been in my peripheral, familiar with the hits but that's about it. When my grandfather died, I inherited his record collection which included 3 albums from them. This one is produced by the [in]famous Phil Spector. Although, the legendary Unchained Melody was instead produced by member Bill Medley so it ended up as a B-Side to the single Hung On You. Of course, it became a massive and enduring hit. Later copies of the single somehow begin to show Phil Spector as the producer!
Because I don't listen to them very often, their voices are very nostalgic to me. Once I hit play on the record, I am instantly transported to the backseat of my grandpa's truck and listening to the oldies station on the way to the beach.
Just Once In My Life is another big hit off of this album. Their low voices are in great form. I love the melody, backup singers and full instrumentals. Makes for a dreamy track.
Things liven up a bit with Big Boy Pete. A mix of country and blues, this is a story-telling track describing some misadventures and injecting some fun into the usually serious sounds from the guys.
Unchained Melody, of course, is a legendary song that has been covered by many and even had a resurgence in the early 1990s thanks to the movie Ghost where it was a Billboard hit once again! I do tend to find this song a bit on the boring side, very slow. My favorite rendition is that of Elvis Presley's.
We get back into the blues with You Are My Sunshine, a spin on the classic children's song. This song borrows from the current trends a lot more than the preceding tracks, it is more like blues at the go-go. The first dance track of the bunch, that is for sure - quite fun!
A cover of The Great Pretender follows. I love the original so this does pale a bit in comparison, although their harmonies are especially beautiful!
Sticks and Stones gets back into the discotheque mood with this groovy track. I'm sure this was present at several dance parties at the time!
See That Girl sees the return of the familiar baritone in a sweet ballad perfect for a bedtime playlist. /yawn/
Oo-poo-pah-doo is a little silly diddy full of studio chatter sure to amuse the fans. I think it goes a little long and is a bit cringe by today's standards but it goes into a pretty fun blues track anyway!
You'll Never Walk Alone is a take on the classic gospel song. The solo vocals at the beginning sound great, although their voices are not melding together as nicely on this song as usual and the overall instrumentation sounds a bit messy, probably due to the "wall of sound" Phil Spector is known for.
Guess Who? is another sleepy time ballad, although it does sound very nice and I enjoy the little bells happening.
The Blues is a fun, bluesy jam written by Bill Medley. Bobby Hatfield needs a pop filter on his microphone really badly! The production on the vocals is very amateur.
I enjoyed most tracks on side 1, however side 2 is completely full of throwaways! I don't pay much attention to Phil Spector, but I know he has a crazy bad reputation and I have to say I am not impressed with his production on most of this as well. Bill Medley was a co-producer so some of the blame may lie there, but Phil is listed first and it's his label so he should take more care in what comes out under his name, just strictly referring to the production quality, not the songs themselves.
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ok !! yall need so many updates from me aaa i'll try to speedrun them n not give u too much junk to read hehe
the main thing is, today i took a huuuge train ride home from uni !! i was on the road for a super long time but i got tons of reading done :3 but for about a month , i won't be seein any of my uni lore people in person ;; it's gonna be weird for sure since i've spent so much time around them recently, but i think in some cases (ie meadow lol) the distance will be good to help me rly evaluate what i'm getting out of that closeness n whether it's worth it.
plus, i'll get to hang out with my friends from here more too !! theres TONS of interesting stuff goin on with them too, so i'm sure there'll b more of that !!
anyway, here's a mini recap of some stuff that's happened since my last entry !!
i had a big night out with a bunch of people !! my first stop was an indie music night with odie and jiji, then after that down to a queer club night where we met meadow and one of their friends !! we also ran into another classmate who we didn't know was even queer, n he ended up joining us for the night :D
i also ran into a bunch more people i know !! specifically winter and (new character time) wave, who i'll add to the masterlist sooon :3
overall it was super fun n they played a bunch of my favorite songs :3 i love gay people <3
remember how i said 'as per jiji's advice i'm gonna try n keep some distance from meadow'? yeah i for sure did not do that. we explored a retail park n saw a movie on one day, did field work in the city another, n kept walking to class together almost every day !! i am ,, so tired !!
honestly, the crush might be beginning to fade, or just shapeshift into a friendship. i'm becoming more n more aware of potential red flags or just reasons i might not personally want to date them.. mainly, we're just really different in terms of personality. compared to when i'm hanging out with jiji and odie, i just mask around meadow a lot more. i overthink a lot, they tease me over my silly cringe interests n traits (of which there are a lot lol) instead of hyping me up , and i know they don't mean anything of it but i'm tired of being constantly reminded of how Different i am from them ,, and by extension from most people.. ok but wait there was last night .......
we went to a candlelight concert !! to any pair of people other than us, it probably would've been super romantic. what a waste of a perfect night, right? but it was still nice. we dressed up extra pretty, the music was nice, we sat right at the back of a beautiful church and listened to basically a classical music concert. i drank mulled wine in the intermission, there were about 20 christmas trees all decorated and themed after different charities and local organisations. crush thoughts aside, it was a really magical experience for what it cost (15 pounds yippee) :3
but , of course , since i knew that if i got home after that i'd have the most miserable yearning-filled night, i helped set up a pizza party with my flatmates (and odie) instead !! so jiji, comet, and our fourth roommate chipi !! i'm surprised i haven't mentioned him yet, at some point he should get a loredump post of his own since there's a lot to unpack with him lol
anyway the pizza party went great , save for the worlds worst phonecall with the pizza place which i foolishly volunteered to have. that pizza place employee in particular encompasses all the reasons i get anxious about phone calls.. yikes!
ok i think that's everything interesting that's happened so far !! here's to hoping i can have a nice relaxing (but still productive !!) month off. well , aside from the 6 giant essays i need to research and write >< but it's fine, i'll cope :,) bye for now !!
#star.txt#crushes#digital diary#starlit meadow#starlit odie#starlit jiji#starlit winter#starlit wave#starlit comet#starlit chipi
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Personal rant or some shit bc i just wanna get this out rn. yeeeee this will be long
So today i had a vit of a stressful day with uni n all bc ive been sick and admittedly lazy over the last week up til like tuesday and i had to turn in an Interpretation/essay tonight and prepare a group presentation for tmr (saturday seminars should b illegal but ok i literally chose this). N e way so ive been procrastinating like hell up until this morning so i didnt rly eat before showing up to seminar at 12am and afterwards i had to check with my one remaining presentation groupmember and finish the interpretation and tgen i had swordfighting class at 5. I didnt Really gave time for it but its fun and im very behind bc i misses several lessons already and am generally. Not good at it lol. n e way i turn up to swords and we peactice some routines ig and heres where the peoblem rly starts. Basically i am a huge crybaby, always have been (im older than firestar btw for context), esp when i feel criticized or yknow. Make mistakes or anything and since i was a sports h8er with 2 left feet n hands all my life n cried often during school pe bc i kept messing up n git embarrassed, it was an important step for me to sign up for this uni extracurricular swords class bc. Doing sth sporty in front of others tgat. Isnt very easy and i gotta learn from scratch is a bit out of my comfort zone. But normally its all v fun, im not good/easily the worst in class but thats ok i learn and move my body and talk to ppl! Proud of myself! Well today not so kuch, i noticed i was getting tense bc of not understanding how to do a movement and everyone (3 experienced fighters bc the main teacher was sick plus 2 other beginners that r learning faster than me) lookimg at me and trying to give helpful pointers and me still doing it wrong... H8 dis feeling bc i kinda freeze up instead of being able to take the tips n try again. Its hard for me to translate input like verbal instructions and demonstsations into my own movements as is. In this state i cant do anything properly and i feel the cryings abt to start while wanting nothing more than to MOVE ON NORMALLY. Well my eye started to get itxhy n teary so i excused myself to "take care of my contacts" (lie) (why am i even so ashamed that i feel i have to lie/make up excuses?? Bro???? That just made the situation Actually cringe?????? Im normally not an ashamed person and cryings just a state/expression but idk) so it was better for a bit until it wasnt. Then i full on cried in class while 2 ppl were actively showing me things/helping me do em right n everyone else kimda watched, kimda practiced. They did ask if i was ok and i said yes like a liar. So at the end of class i normally take the bus home with one of the other new guys but i today just didnt feel able to keep talking to him. So he also asked if i was ok/why i cried and i said i just do that under stress and why i am stressed (uni) so that was also a bit of a lie but only kinda. I said i was gonna go to the livrary instead (another lie, was gonna call my bf to calm me down abit n then take the next bus) so i did tgat n it kinda worked and this genius asked if i had eaten. Bruhhh of fuckin course im sensitive ive only had 3 baked goods all day and hadnt even noticed!!!!!! So then it all made sense, mans gotta get some freakin noursishment to keep their composure in swords class! So i went to another bus stop than normally bc i needed sth from the store and bruh the guy i normally take a DIFFERENT bus with is there (awkwardly votta tell hik i changed my mimd abt the library) and we talk a bit (i feel like i talk to him wayy too much in comparison to him, like we dont know each other that well at all, idek his real name and yknow. If he actually enjoys talking to me) and yea
So now everyone in the 14th century peasant larp class knows my terrible terrible secret:))):)
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rapsittie street kids livewatch
welcome to the last livewatch of 2022! ...and probably the worst since we’re watching the infamous ‘rapsittie street kids’! i’ve seen countless reviews on this special, but i’ve never seen the full thing. today is its 20th anniversary, so why not watch it now? it’ll be bad, it’ll be cringe and it’ll be a whole lot of fun! ;D
the instruments at the beginning are really good! :D
...too bad the visuals aren’t :/
why does the bus sound like a clock?
ooh it’s rap time! B)
ricky: “but if you’ll kindly find the time to deliver gifts 7, 8 and 9 from my list!” rip gifts 1-6 :/
i’ve heard the beginning of the rap so many times that the part after sounds so weird! :o
aw he only has 3 coins rip :/
that could buy a book at st. vincent de paul’s! ;)
a car just slides out of frame lol :D
has he walked like that this whole time? :o
the voices in the music sound a bit creepy...
omg he kicks a basketball and it just f l o a t s lol! ;D
aww his mom died :(
she gave him a bear before she died... AND NOW HE’S GIVING IT TO A GIRL WHO DOESN’T EVEN LIKE HIM NOOOO :(
the bear just f l o a t s
blue haired kid: “another day, another ‘d’ at rapsittie elementary...” says the teenager! :o
nicole got a dino bonk! :o
HOLD UP WHY IS ONE OF THE KIDS NELSON FROM SIMPSONS :o
ricky is talented! :D
the adults in the back tho...
he just throws ornaments on the tree like he’s in the charlie brown christmas special! :o
ok wow he’s just gonna rap and rhyme this whole special isn’t he :/
blue teen: “duuuude! that was soooo coooolll...” and that was so not cooollll... ;)
i’m pausing this to upload my new video and i guess this came out on november 25th not december 14th! the anniversary passed, but we’re in the middle of rapsittie season so i’m still watching it!
it’s all christmas and then S U A R S
smithy: *sees the bear on the floor* ‘what’s that?” ricky: “that’s for nicole honey, i know she’s into money!” that bear is priceless tho! :o
smithy thinks liking nicole is gross lol! ;D
the teacher is fed up with everyone!
knockoff nelson: “hey ricky! let me know any time you want to fall down again! i’ll be sure to shove you in the right direction!” BUURRNNN!!!!! :D
ricky is the only kid to be bummed about recess ever!
teacher: “i said after recess BECAUSE I NEED A RECESS!” ricky: “oooohhhkayyy....” lol! ;D
ricky: “you won’t catch me.... hesitating!” lol! :D
the teacher needs a vacation...
oof this song is cringy! :o
when you wanna be the charlie brown christmas special...
omg nicole and glasses girl are doubling down laughing at that! :o
nicole: “watch what i can do!” ricky: “i’ll watch you nicole!” nicole: “not you, ricky!”
he’s the only one watching her tho...
also why is he wearing a short sleeved shirt IN THE SNOW???
ricky: “and i thought it couldn’t get any colder out here...” oof :/
omg knockoff nelson stole smithy’s sandwich! :o
and it just slides down smithy’s scarf...
the shot zooms out to the teacher and kids with presents but it looks slow mo?
lenee: “oh that looks really cool!” nicole: “here.” *drops it right onto her feet* lol!
nicole’s gift is the best because she bought it from the mall! ;)
OMG WAIT IS THAT JOHN DELANCIE AS THE PRINCIPAL???? :o
turns out it’s not but it sounds so much like him! :o
nancy cartwright, jodi benson, mark hamill and page o’hara are in this so there’s plenty of talent here already! ;)
he walks away slowly... (just like me seeing this!)
kids: “merry christmas!” blue kid: “principal dude B)” lol!
the kids ignore the teacher lol ;)
nicole thinks she’s sooooo perfect because she gets things at the mall?
oh no it’s the bear! :o
SHE CALLED IT A NASTY OLD THING YOU BISH!!!! >:(
ricky called her stupid yas you get her! ;D
why are lenee’s arms twitching?
lenee: “we go to this really big store and it starts with a ‘w’!” omg wallymart...? ;)
it’s the floating candle!! :o
AND THE GRANDMA YAAAS!!! :D
aww ricky has a santa letter! :D
grandma: “rdfgdjfdfjgh sendin’ letters!” lol!
it just... floats away from his armpit?
AND IT HAS AN @ SYMBOL???
nicole is insulting lenee AND HAVING A SEIZURE OMG :o
nicole’s mom: “has my princess been a good girl?” nicole: “i’ve been a good girl all year long!” YOU BISH! >:(
NO NO NO NOT THE SONG!!!!!
nicole: “♫ look at me! ♫“ no thanks!
the snowflake is traveling to lenee’s house!
this is a nice colored sky! :)
aww i feel so bad for lenee :(
her mom doesn’t nod... she bows!
mom: “come on, it’s christmas! cheer up!” that didn’t sound very cheery of you...
oh no nicole is reading the letter! :o
she feels bad... :/
YAS GRANDMA GIBBERISH!!!! :D
grandma: “dgdfgjjgsogisigsdfhsfdf christmaaaaas!” lol! ;D
OMG NICOLE THREW THE BEAR AWAY???? :o
nicole, smithy and lenee are in an abandoned building!!!! :o
smithy: “i can so blackmail you guys!” wtf lol?
they looked everywhere but alas! :/
omg dogs are chasing them!!! :o
bully: “look at the babies scared of little doggies!” i’d like to see you get at them! ;)
smithy threw his sandwich at the bullies... and they had their own chase! :D
yay they found the bear! :D
lenee: “let’s climb on that tree and jump over the wall.” nicole: “a lady does not climb trees!” smithy: “now is not the time to be a girl!” lol!
this animation is so awkward tho??
they made it! :D
aww nicole is giving ricky his bear! :)
nicole: “but doesn’t that mean a lot to you?” ricky: “yes. and so does................. friendship.” that pause tho! ;D
ooh lenee’s fam!
MARK HAMIL IS HER DAD OMG :o
lenee sees santa! :D
cloud santaaaa!!!! :D
omg lenee song! :o
WHY IS NICOLE’S MOM OBSESSED WITH THE MALL TOO
dad: “nicole has my good looks... and your spending habits!” lol! ;D
omg nicole’s grandma wanted a videobox... which is what ricky asked for! :o
ew nicole’s parents winked and it was weird :(
aww nicole gave her gift to ricky! :)
and lenee’s sister got... that...
ricky, grandma, nicole and smithy are visiting! :D
nicole apologized! :)
grandma: “dhdhhdfgfjfghg christmaaaaas!” iconic!!! :D
dad: “SHUT THAT DOOR!” the perfect way to end a christmas special! ;D
that was rapsittie street kids! it was just as bad as all the reviews say, but i still had fun watching it! visually, it’s the worst christmas special, but it still has good moments unlike other baddies (looking at you ‘the christmas tree’!) the plot was nice and so was the acting... mostly! i’m glad i got to finally see this special after hearing about it for so long! happy 20th anniversary, rapsittie street kids! :D
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enhypen as your boyfriend.
boyfriend!enhypen x gen!reader. fluff. 1.9k. curse words. mention of bugs, food. not requested.
🐈 ⸝⸝ HEESEUNG ˙𐃷˙
super-duper caring !!
he’s so whipped for you — he smiles just by thinking about you
also very giggly around you
LOVES lending you his beanies
(aka. you stealing them..)
+ you steal his earrings as well ! not that he minds
absolutely adores singing for you / he loves singing you to sleep :D
hold up, is being heeseung’s s/o just being his personal ramen cook 🤨🤨
he aaalwaays bugs you to play games with him (especially wii and nintendo switch lmao)
either that or you’re playing animal crossing while eating takeout at your dinner table
you’re the only person in the world who he’ll ever do aegyo for.
he secretly enjoys it, but shhh you didn’t hear that from me
i think he likes calling you names like cutie, cutiepie or just a shorter version of your name <3 (if there is one !)
booping your nose is on his everyday to do list ☝️
lowkey therapist & boyfriend in one ngl
WAIT he loves making playlists for you two,,
“y/n! i made another playlist, do you wanna listen to it? i made it while thinking of you.” <//3
the type to write cheesy lyrics about you, then later cringes at his own writing bUT then leaves it like that because you like it !
you have his cover of lauv’s “i’m so tired” either set as your alarm or play it on loop everyday
(random but for some reason i can picture him giving you a cassette with his cover on it just for the vintage vibes)
🐈 ⸝⸝ JAY ˙𐃷˙
the mom-and-boyfriend in one ;]
f a s h i o n c o u p l e
you are literally fashion icons. no disagreements.
you have matching clothes or accessories ! even if it’s really subtle, the gesture behind it is super adorable <//3
cooking pt. 2 :D but this time there’s a gorden ramsay in your relationship
i can just SEE how you both two impersonate gorden ramsay while cooking which makes everything 10 times funnier !! checks every 5 seconds if the food is ready tho because he doesn’t wanna risk anything
never cleans up afterwards, either you do or no one does
since you’re both fashion icons your social media followers are going 📈📈📈
literally couple goals.
he loves taking pictures of you,, but also wants you to take pictures of him
jay gets flustered easily so please make him flustered with sudden compliments, hugs, kisses, etc. !!
he’s also the only member i can really see calling you babe
confident but shy about pda at the same time ??? he’s both LOL
you always tease him with his RAS moments and randomly quote them when you’re in the middle of a conversation with him lmao
random and idk if this fits here, but he likes making your lunch — leaves you encouraging notes too <3
last but not least: jokingly gets angry at you when he wants something from you, and you do the same thing back ♡
🐈 ⸝⸝ JAKE ˙𐃷˙
sweetest and softest boyfriend to ever exist. i’m so soft for him JSHSHS
definitely calls you sweetie and darling. 100%. fight me if you think otherwise.
shows you pics of layla everyday (it’s become routine for him >_<)
a tiny bit cliché BUT lends you his jacket whenever you’re cold (even when you’re inside !!)
random thought: jake puts his hands in your hoodie pockets...
💔💔💔
it’s his personal goal to peck your cheek and forehead at least twice a day — gets pouty if he wasn’t able to do that ))):::
talks in english a lot because you love his accent !!
if you’re an english speaker, you’ll have conversations in english all. the. time.
if you’re not an english speaker, no worries, he’ll teach you !
+ reads you bedtime stories in english (jake’s australian accent >>>)
dreams of travelling with you to australia <33
if there’s a bug in the house you better know that jake will NOT be removing them and runs out of the house
WILL stay over at one of the other member’s houses untill that bug is REMOVED .
so if you’re afraid of bugs as well,,, i’m sorry bae, but it’ll be your task to remove these little... creatures 😐
ngl you have more photos of layla than of him on your phone lol
(spams you with her pictures and captions them with “y/n!!! look!!! layla with a flower!!!! layla with a butterfly!!!!” it’s just so sweet aaa)
we need some “””drama””” so you make jokes about him being a “🥶💸🔥💪” boy a lot in your relationship LMAO
🐈 ⸝⸝ SUNGHOON ˙𐃷˙
ice skating dates.
this has been mentioned in other headcanons a lot already but i just HAD to include it,,
convinces you to eat ice cream after your date LOL even if it IS winter
btw. fashion couple nr. 2 !!!
MIRROR SELCAS
MIRROR SELCAS
ugh the visuals and the power you two hold,,,, i can’t,,,,,
has better clothes than you ngl so you share clothes lmao
it started with him lending you his sweatpants, but then you didn’t want to return them forgot to return them and BOOM 💥 here we are
extremely awkward and shy at first — don’t worry though, he becomes much more chaotic in the later phases of your relationship
he teases you SO MUCH. LIKE. SO MUCH.
always has small smile (smirk?) on his face when he’s about to make a cocky remark (so beware)
you tease him back just twice as hard which 1.) results in him in becoming flustered 2.) fails LOL
off-topic but he’d love a s/o that has a similar style to him ??? a more elegant, classy, dark style perhaps
when he’s away / busy he’ll send you some selcas and captions them with “how r u doing??” “did you eat yet?” “cheer up :P”
kinda shy about pda but likes showing off too ???
i mean,, men... 🙄🙄 /lh
whenever someone mentions your name near him, he’ll just try to hide his smile while biting his lip (yk what i’m talking about???) and you’ll see his dimples and the affectionate look in his eyes and just AAAAA
the type of boyfriend that calls you love~
🐈 ⸝⸝ SUNOO ˙𐃷˙
skin care routines with sunoo 24/7 🤝
he does your hair (if your hair is long enough to do different hairstyles with it ofc !!)
send you daily weekly skin care products he thinks you two should try out / that’d be good for your skin <3
spa nights every friday at 9pm — he only lets you in if you wear a stylish pyjama LOL
you buy him peach items because they just remind you so much of him (。•́︿•̀。)
SELCA TIME !!! his phone is always ready !!! (apart from his storage maybe?)
PARTICIPATES IN SELCA DAYS OF YOUR FAVOURITE IDOLS AAA
loves to go on walks w u
does A LOT of aegyo,,
and i know that you knew that this point will be in this headcanon.
for eg. instead of saying goodnight or bye he’ll just do aegyo for you not that anyone minds tbh
stages of sunoo flirting (?):
a — tries to compliment you (it sounds more like a flirty remark tbh)
b — realizes then blushes
c — cringes and runs away LMAO
playfully acts jealous, so you know it’s a joke but deep down he’s actually jealous
you two match each others vibes a lot — if one is sad, the other is sad as well
+ tells you your posture is bad when you sit like a banana or tells you to go to sleep early and when you don’t listen to him, he’ll show you an article that proves that (abc) and (xyz) is bad for you and says “i told you so.” 💀
🐈 ⸝⸝ JUNGWON ˙𐃷˙
impresses you by doing kicks (does the kick cap challenge on tiktok and/or you play kick it by nct 127 for the funzies)
poking his dimple is a MUST . 😩😩
though gets super shy when you kiss him and also if you buy him gifts !!
cheers you up whenever you feel down or are upset
compliments you a ton ))): will randomly come up to you and tell you that your fit is cute or that you look brighter today,,, little does he know it's because of him ;]
HUGS!HUGS!HUGS
poking his dimple comes first, then hugging
the other members tease you two everytime you’re over LOL it’s like there are two koalas clinging onto each other
our yang garden gained another sheep +1
you two randomly play sheep,,,, like,,, everyday ???? sheep cosplays 👍
idk why ig it’s just fun to imitate sheep and go “mmmeEeEeeEhh” to annoy others
talking of that, even THOUGH he is a responsible leader he will not hesitate to do stupid shit with you
“hey how about we ring on that house there and yell “sheep for sale!” do you think they’ll open the door?”
“i don’t know... let’s find out!” 🤝
let’s just say that this didn’t end well..
also kinda bullies you (in a loving way ofc !!) pand teases you nonstop
either calls you asshole or love aHA
in conclusion: a very unpredictable relationship,, would 10/10 recommend.
very random but i feel like his love language is acts of service
🐈 ⸝⸝ NI-KI ˙𐃷˙
oh look it’s our tsundere 😼
can’t go a day without dancing so you two have vibing sessions at 2am everyday ft. the others telling you to go to bed
you’re the only one that can make him soft lol
if you’re older than him, you would definitely take care of him like your own baby !!
if you are the same age as him or younger it’d be awkward for him at first, because he isn’t used to taking care of someone younger, so he’d treat you as if you were his best friend at the beginning
you love to watch him dance !! it’s so satisfying,, LITERAL asmr.
pranks you 24/7. boy has NO mercy. will not care if the others will scold him later. he will do the prank smoothly (?) — doesn’t care about the consequences LMAO
probably sets your alarm to someone screaming or a cringy aegyo song <//3
wants to film dance covers with you !! you don’t have to be the best dancer either !! as long as you have fun ^__^
the other members find you really cute but are also vERY TIRED OF YOU,, two energized teens in a relationship was not a good idea ☝️
likes to randomly hold your hand and swing it around
probably distant at the beginning of the relationship because a.) he doesn’t want to pressure you/make things awkward b.) he doesn’t really know what to do either ???
(if you’re not japanese or don’t know how to speak japanese) he’ll definitely teach you some japanese phrases and words !! introduce you to his culture as well :DD and he really wants to know more about your culture too <3
teaches you phrases like “sunoo is a dumbass” for the funzies LOL
randomly makes micheal jackson impressions,,, it’s hilarious LMFAO
#enhypen#enhypen imagines#enhypen headcanons#enhypen reactions#enhypen scenarios#heeseung#jay#jake#sunghoon#sunoo#jungwon#niki#lee heeseung#park jay#sim jake#park sunghoon#kim sunoo#yang jungwon#nishimura riki#enhypen heeseung#enhypen jay#enhypen jake#enhypen sunghoon#enhypen sunoo#enhypen jungwon#enhypen niki#enhypen fluff#enhypen x reader
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{𝓭𝓮𝓴𝓾 𝔁 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻}... _*𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕙 𝕙𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖*_
lil bit of spicy cringe. minors...get the fuck out
tired.."i'm tired'' "i know, hon but we need to interview you sweetie...it's just how it goes" ugh. that feathery light pretty princess voice. she's annoyed... you can tell. of course miss ass isn't aloud to tell you that. i've been here for days. years. my deadbeats dumped me here for ten grand when i was fucking ten and their tiny little sum was used for booze and weed paying the bills. and honestly- "hello? y/n?" .you bitch.... "yes? miss ass? you know i'm beginning to think you don't like that name very much. " noting the growl she gave you. she retained her composure. "what can you tell me about him?''
Haha...when shit was close to normal I wasn't fearing for my damn life with a sadistic fuck knocking on my door gently with an intent to do the EXACT OPPOSITE OF gentle. Y/n...he said lazily. You flinched at the whisper of your name. "fuccckk youuuu" you hiss lowly as you couldn't open the window. any word of profanity that passed your lips would piss him off you. did. not. want. that. "awww come on... don't tell me you don't want your present?" you wanted nothing from that piece of fuck. you huddled in a ball. a last resort if he saw you like this surely he would let you go? in walked the sadistic fuck. he stared at you disappointed clucked his tongue and knelt down to hold your chin. "now..now doll i thought i had told you to sit and stay love..."you kept your eyes down and he roughly gripped your face painfully ripping your gaze from the floor into his eyes. "hmmm?" he said you know what he wanted. compliance. "sorry daddy.." "now i want you to be a really good girl for me today because i want to take you somewhere! isn't that fun!" you prompt an annoyed look from him when you don't respond and he harshly grabs your face again "isn't. that. fun?" he said "yes.." "we really need to teach you some manners don't we? haha.. you know.. ever since i took you away from that wretched place you've been nothing short of disrespectful.." "All the shit i've done for you... is it wrong for me to ask for a little reward..think of it as a thank you." "it's only fair i fought for you i killed for you i've done unspeakable things for you love... and i haven't gotten a thank you..not. one...so thank me right now..". he doesn't mean...shit..."b-but." you blubber and before you can protest he kisses you roughly his hands gripping your wrists tightly and pinning you to the wall the room grows hot and it feels as if you are on fire his tongue thrust into your mouth immediately and you wrap your arms around his neck. why? you don't know "please..." you whimper "want me to take you on this floor love? I don't think so...a slut as pretty as yourself isn't getting fucked so hastily. i'll make sure you can't walk i'll make sure you're drunk on this cock. forget where we were gonna go i wanna taste what's mine first"
#its hot as hell in this hot ass funky ass room im in is that the grimreaper?#deku midoriya#midoriya izuku x reader#deku x reader#izuku x reader#izuku midoriya x reader#midoriya x reader#deku fluff#midoriya izuku#mha#villan deku#yandere deku#fanfiction#ao3#ao3 fanfic#fanfic#bnha midoriya#mha midoriya#izuku midoria x reader#midoriya x you#midoriya x y/n#midoriya imagine#izuku
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Hello barista! May i have a Medium Moccachino with almond syrup and sugar sprinkles
(Kaeya comforting reader after a bad nightmare)
Hey there, dear! Thank you for your request, I really enjoyed writing for Kaeya again and you chose a great combination of prompts. So, without further ado, here's your drink: a medium moccachino with almond syrup and some sugar sprinkles on top. Please enjoy! <3 (Reblogs and comments are very much appreciated.)
Prompts: hurt/comfort, Character A comforting character B after a nightmare, “I’m afraid you’re going to break my heart.” + “Shh. Don’t cry. Please don’t cry.” (400 followers event: JJ's coffee shop)
I’m with you – Kaeya x gn!reader (hurt/comfort)
Kaeya wasn’t sure what had woken him up in the middle of the night. Maybe it was the sound of the rain pouring down outside or the distant chatter of the Knights patrolling the streets but, in the end, it didn’t matter anyway. It was still dark outside and you were sound asleep next to him, so Kaeya shifted closer to you to drape his arm over your waist and closed his eyes again. If he was lucky, he’d get a few more hours of sleep, and if not… well, in that case he could at least enjoy the time he got to spend with you, maybe waking you up with a few kisses before your alarm went off.
A soft smile flashed over his face. Yeah, he definitely liked that idea.
It was only then when he realized that you didn’t sleep as peacefully as he had initially thought. Incoherent mumbles escaped your slightly parted lips and your brows were furrowed, almost as if you were in pain. The next moment, your hand shot up, your fingers curling around his wrist in a tight grip. “No, please,” he heard you mutter, and the sorrowful tone of your voice was enough to show him that your dreams weren’t pleasant at all. You sounded absolutely heartbroken. “Kaeya,” you continued, so quietly that he almost didn’t catch it. “Don’t leave me, please.”
His heart dropped. You were dreaming about him – leaving you? Just the thought was ridiculous to him; you had no reason to believe this, and yet, here you were, begging him not to go, even though he was right there beside you, holding you in his arms, just like he did every night when he wasn’t on duty or had to work overtime.
“(Y/N),” Kaeya whispered, carefully freeing his arm from your grasp to brush his fingertips over your cheek. “I’m here, dearie,” he reassured you softly, although you probably couldn’t hear him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
He had expected you to calm down under his touch but your sleep was getting even more fitfully, to a point where you started to toss and turn as if you were experiencing the worst nightmare you ever had.
Carefully, Kaeya shook you by your shoulder after switching on the bedside light. At this point, he was convinced that it was better to wake you up and comfort you instead of watching you suffer through a nightmare that made no sense, at least to him. Why would he leave you? You were the love of his life, the one he wanted to spend the rest of his days with, and he would be more than an absolute moron if he’d ever throw that away.
He uttered your name again, his hand still resting on your shoulder. “Please, wake up. Everything’s alright, love, I’m here with you.”
When you finally stirred awake under his touch, Kaeya felt like an eternity had passed but in reality, it couldn’t be more than ten minutes. You were a bit disorientated at first, your eyes heavy with sleep as you looked up at him.
“Kaeya?” you mumbled tiredly, your voice so quiet that he could barely hear it. He brushed a strand of hair out of your face, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Yes, my dear. It’s me.”
You didn’t return his smile. Instead, you kept staring at him, an expression of utter disbelief on your face. “You’re here.”
Once again, Kaeya wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close to him in one swift movement. Your head was now resting against his chest while he rubbed comforting circles on your back. “Of course I am,” he replied softly and kissed the top of your head. “Where else would I be?”
“I don’t know.” You sighed, slowly melting into his embrace. Kaeya always had this effect on you. He made you feel safe and loved, no matter what had happened, and he was always there for you when you needed him. You had no idea how you would live without him; he was like a guiding light in the darkest night, shining just for you. Sometimes, you even felt like he was too good to be true. And – an even scarier thought – that he was too good for you.
It wasn’t that you constantly worried about these things, no. You knew that you weren’t his first love, and that was fine, but sometimes you couldn’t help but doubt that you were really the right one for him. And while you could keep these thoughts at bay pretty easily throughout the day, your subconsciousness didn’t let you forget them at night. Most of the time, you just slept badly then but occasionally, you suffered from nightmares about Kaeya leaving you – just like today.
Suddenly, there were tears in your eyes, even though you knew that Kaeya was right beside you. Maybe it was the lack of sleep that made you lose control or the fact that your dreams always seemed so awfully real but in this moment, you just couldn’t help it. In a matter of seconds, your emotions had overwhelmed you, and you were quietly sobbing into his chest.
“Oh, my dear (Y/N),” Kaeya whispered, his fingers trailing to the back of your neck to caress the soft skin there. “What’s wrong, hm?”
You didn’t reply; instead, you wrapped your arms around him tightly, as if you wanted to make sure that he’d stay here with you. He cradled you while you cried, whispering soothing words. “Shh. Don’t cry,” he mumbled and pressed another kiss to your head. “Please don’t cry.”
“I’m sorry,” you choked out in between sobs. “It’s – it’s late. We should – sleep.”
The grip of his arms around you tightened. “Don’t apologize,” he replied quietly. “It’s okay to cry.”
You buried your face in the crook of his neck, your tears leaving a warm, wet trail on his skin as he held you close, patiently waiting for you to calm down.
When your tears finally dried up, he gently tilted your head up and brushed his lips against yours in a gentle kiss. “Do you want to talk about it?”
You hesitated. How would he react if you told him that you were insecure about your relationship sometimes? You didn’t want to hurt his feelings but on the other hand, you felt like you owed him an explanation after he had comforted you for what had seemed like an eternity.
“It’s stupid, really,” you replied eventually. Kaeya chuckled quietly but you knew him well enough to realize that he wasn’t trying to make fun of you or your emotions. “Dearie, if it makes you cry like that in the middle of the night it’s most definitely not stupid. Talk to me, please. Maybe I can help.”
You let out a shaky breath. “I’m… I’m afraid you’re going to break my heart.”
There, you said it. And while a part of you already regretted your honesty, you couldn’t deny that you also felt relieved at the same time.
“Kaeya?” you whispered when he remained silent even after a few minutes had passed. “I’m sorry. I told you it’s stupid.”
He cleared his throat but even then, his voice sounded a bit breathy when he finally replied, “You really have nightmares about me leaving you?”
“I know,” you said, your face heating up in embarrassment. “It’s pathetic. Don’t bother your head about it, please.”
“But how could I not? Have I done anything that makes you think that I don’t want to be with you?”
You cringed at his words. Now that he put it like that your concerns seemed even dumber, at least to you. “No,” you said and sighed. “It’s just – I don’t know, I can’t explain it. I guess I’m just afraid that you’ll find someone better than me one day and realize that I’m not what you want or need.”
“There’s no one out there who’s better than you, love. And you are exactly what I want,” Kaeya reassured you, the tone of his voice so earnest that it made a smile flash over your face, “I love you, (Y/N). And nothing is ever going to change that. Okay?”
“Okay,” you whispered, although you were sure that your doubts would never go away completely. But you trusted Kaeya. Even the worst nightmare couldn’t change that. And with that thought in mind, you snuggled up to him, indulging in the warmth of his body and the safety of his embrace as you allowed yourself to drift off to sleep again.
Taglist: @blissmal, @aimicoos, @childe-support, @rim0na, @sunsaturnn
#kaeya x reader#kaeya alberich x reader#kaeya alberich imagine#kaeya x you#kaeya alberich x you#kaeya genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact imagine#genshin x reader#hurt/comfort#gn!reader#gender neutral reader#kaeya x gn!reader#reader insert
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