#not saying it won’t be queerbait

[catwouthats]

“Lokius is queer bait! Lokius is queerbait!!”

Remember when y’all thought Good Omens was queerbait? Yeah.

[figonas]

I think you perpetually online people need to understand that “queerbaiting” does not mean a character is heavily implied to be a queer person, with a live in partner, but we the audience are not explicitly shown a coming out scene. Queerbaiting is when a character is heavily implied to be a queer person and then it’s explicit confirmed they’re Absolutely Not Queer(tm) and are in a Straight Relationship(tm) and that live in partner they have romantic chemistry with is just their Friendly Roommate(tm). Not everything needs to be shown to you explicitly for you to understand the implications. Having to use critical thinking skills to draw connections between clearly defined and obviously presented dots isn’t queer baiting. For the love of god use your brain cells before they all die and leave your head about as full as an empty peanut shell.

[microclown]

I think, not everyone, but a lot of the people who are so hung up on the kiss aren’t thinking about it within the context of the narrative.

I probably won’t articulate this well, but the whole plot of season 2 felt like a direct, meta-y response to us, the fans, and our desire see Aziraphale and Crowley’s relationship progress to something more.

Neil had established in the first season, they are already in love, so what is it really then that we want see? What is it that’s missing? That leaves us feeling unsatisfied?

What does love mean to you? What would it mean to Aziraphale and Crowley? What does a loving relationship look like, and how does one get there?

The methods Crowley and Aziraphale use to get Maggie and Nina together are common romance tropes in fiction. Crowley says “one fabulous kiss and we’re good!”

But rainstorms and dancing didn’t make Maggie and Nina fall in love. They were going to get there on their own, eventually, after a lot of open communication and working on their own personal growth.

And “one fabulous kiss” won’t give us a happy ending. It won’t give us what we’re missing from Aziraphale’s and Crowley’s relationship. We as fans like to think that’s all we want, but is it really? Because the love is there! What we’re truly missing has more to do with internal growth and healing, communication, and working towards a true understanding of each other.

And I think that’s what we’ll get in season 3! I don’t know if we’ll get another kiss although I would love to see one but we will get a satisfactory resolution between two beings who are deeply in love.

As a side note, I don’t want to down play how fucking important it was to have them kiss on screen. As someone who has grown up watching queer coded relationships on screen and is exhausted from having everyone involved queerbait, or even outright ridicule their fans for seeing it that way, it is so refreshing to have a very visual, undeniable, romantic gesture. Because I know it really does take a kiss for some people *cough* my parents *cough* to see a relationship as anything but platonic. I’m so glad we got that undeniable validation before what I can only expect is going to be an epic third chapter!

[thealogie]

Everyone saying it wasn’t queerbaiting before and it won’t be queerbaiting if this isn’t what it seems you’re so right that’s such an overused word, we need a new term for “getting on my last nerve by making your whole show about the relationship between two characters of the same gender and deliberately playing on romantic tropes/storytelling conventions between them because that’s the most appealing aspect of the story and it’s what’s drawing in viewers but if I tell a single straight offline person this is a gay relationship they will at best laugh and say that’s a cute interpretation”

[song-of-baldy-ron]

WWDITS fandom y’all gotta realize they’re gonna keep pushing this “will they /won’t they” Nandermo narrative until they make it explicitly confirmed in the show, right?

Like they’re not gonna come out and say “oh 100% these two are gonna get together” before they actually write them getting together, no TV show writing team in the history of TV has done that

I know queerbaiting has hurt us before but as many have pointed out this show is clearly and plainly queer already so that’s not what’s happening

[blakbonnet]

AUTHOR OF THE WEEK: @soupbtch

Ever read a fic and go "they're so 😭" - that's every single Danny fic to me, aka today's second aotw feature, and god, what an amazingly talented author they are.

I'm so glad you decided to write and grace us with your lovely and bonkers fics, because I cannot imagine the OFMD fic world without your incredible Every Part of You series. I cannot imagine logging into this website without another incredible post from you. Every single thing you write (and do) leaves me in stitches and then, more often than not, you straight up chair your friends with your ultra soft way of writing how much they love each other - in between the much needed elbow fucking. You are such an amazingly kind person - hilarious, supportive, and the best cheerleader 💕 Thank you for answering my questions:

What's your writing process like? Do you start with the beginning or the end? Do you write in order or as the scenes come to you?

I start with a pretty detailed outline because if I don’t go in with a plan, I’ll drop threads and/or write myself in circles. Then I have my outline open on half of my screen while I have a separate doc open on the other half where I’m actually writing. I write in order from beginning to end.

Favourite trope or headcanon you like to explore while writing? (Things like Ed's sweet tooth, Stede's ability to bury his feelings etc)

I have a lot of fun writing angst, so I think any facet of that I can explore is a good time. Weigh them down with insecurities and see how far I can bend them with external factors like plot points, each other, or other characters before they snap. So things like Stede believing he ruins everything he touches, Ed believing he doesn’t deserve fine things, and how they both stand in the way of their own happiness because of these feelings. I also love exploring like, the horrible communication skills Ed and Stede have with each other when it comes to their emotions, and setting up story beats where that intercommunication can break down. Because they’re idiots (affectionate).

Whose voice is easier to write - Ed or Stede? Why?

Ed for sure. I find him very easy to connect with, emotionally. All my favorite characters think they’re unlovable monsters and no, this says NOTHING about me personally, etc etc etc.

Your personal favourite thing you've written that you'd like more people to read

Red Skies at Night! It's modern au, but they're still on a boat! If you like slow burn, bitchy Stede, Ed with a tongue piercing, fun costumes, and a big dash of pining, I def recommend checking it out!! ❤️

What is the one word that you think you use a lot?

The one that comes to mind is ‘blink.’ Kind of a funny one, but to me, it’s such a juicy way to imply so much while saying so little, so I know I use it frequently. Stede asks, “Do you trust me?” and Ed blinks back at him as he tries to work out why that question hits him like a truck (because the answer is a very easy yes). Ed says, “You make me happy,” and Stede blinks back at him in awe (because Stede? Making someone happy? That can’t be true). You get it.

Do you have a beta reader? Have they made you a better writer?

Yes, Beedle (@sleepystede) and Connie (@spirker) have both beta read for me! They’ve helped me tremendously with flow and rewording awkward sentences, and I’ve improved a lot from their feedback. Connie has also been invaluable to bounce ideas off of for new fics and just generally pushing me to be more creative through her never-ending support and big beautiful brain.

Why OFMD 🥹

I loved season 1 when I first watched it, but as soon as I saw the season 2 trailer, something clicked in my brain. Where season 1 was slow burn, will-they-won’t-they, is this real or are they queerbaiting, season 2 was posing itself as very, very clearly queer. Stede is going to get his man. That’s it, that’s the show. Undisguised, unabashed, unapologetic gay yearning and gay romance. There are a million other things I can say, but I think it really all comes down to that. What a gift. No one does it like our show. 💖

Please head over to @ofmdlovelyletters (who also made the header) and send your love to all your favourite authors (and authors of the week 😈 watch that blog for some special letters coming your way)

[ravennhearted]

Okay listen up we’re gonna talk Merlin for a second.

Everyone’s always on about how the show was the greatest queerbait, or how there wasn’t any subtext and it was just text, and it’s all this big discussion on whether or not it was intentional or not and it’s just like

We have interviews of the directs and cast saying that Merlin and Arthur love each other. The literal director said that they shot the last episode as a LOVE STORY. They knew what they were doing. For how long is debatable, but they knew

And it wasn’t a queerbait.

It was queercoding

They couldn’t say it outright. Of course they couldn’t. In that time it never would have flown, not with the premise of the show or the executives, so they wrote it in as what they could starting from season 3, probably, if I had to guess on when it became a serious thing. And then they kept running with it, pushing and pushing and pushing as the finale nears, and they know they can’t get in a kiss, they know, so they try and have Arthur say I love you to Merlin

(You can see it in the clip, how the thank you doesn’t line up but I love you does. I’m not the first to say this and I certainly won’t be the last)

They tried. And then they were stopped.

Anyway I’m not exactly sure where I’m going with this anymore but it wasn’t a queerbait, it was queercoding, and I’ll die standing on that hill

[eddiediazismyhusband]

This is what gets me when people write in depth analysis about how dumb they would be to not go there with queer Eddie and with Buddie. Like yes, I agree it would be incredibly stupid and bad writing - unfortunately as much as I want that to reassure me(and I’ll admit some days when I’m sad and need to not be I pretend to let it), it doesn’t. Just because it would be stupid and bad writing doesn’t mean they won’t do it. We’ve seen this show repeatedly make bad writing choices before. I’ve watched TV shows time and time again screw things up in the eleventh hour, I’ve seen so many shows set things up and then take a hard left turn into the dumbest plots in existence. And they get backlash for it but still do it. So as much as I want to believe that because logic and basic literary analysis says Eddie is queer and Buck and Eddie are each others’ best match - that isn’t a guarantee of anything. I’m also preparing myself that if we actually do get a queer Eddie storyline and buddie canon - there is a high possibility that they stumble through it in a ridiculous and poorly written way. I want more than anything for that not to be true but it is still a very distinct possibility.

this is exactly my feelings- like one of my biggest pet peeves are people making posts as if buddie is 10000% happening and there is absolutely zero possibility of it not going that way which i’m sorry to be a debbie downer once again but that’s just not true

what kills me is everyone in the fandom keeps talking about “it’d be so ooc for _______”, seemingly forgetting the fact that s7 was ooc for so many of the main characters to the point that we were all ragging on the writers about it… like if they were able to write a season so sloppy and terribly ooc what makes you think they won’t continue to do so, especially after tim just said “i don’t like to plan out seasons”

ooc writing happens in tv shows all the time. just because something wouldn’t make sense for a character/plotline doesn’t mean they won’t just do it anyway. like I’ve said before, tim has shown us that he only cares about shock value and drama- telling us himself in a interview that “i can’t just let them be happy, then no one would watch” (which is such total bullshit but this is the man who decided to make eddie have an emotional affair with a doppelgänger of his dead wife rather than just, yk, confirm his queerness)

i get it. it’s disappointing. you don’t want your favorite shows/characters to tank and go off the rails. but unfortunately, it has happened time and time and time again in network tv, and 9-1-1 is not immune to this.

i fully agree with the posts and analyses that detail how the show has set up buddie being the only satisfactory endgame relationship between them, and how it would be foolish and bad writing for them not to, but unfortunately (as you said in your ask) this show has made god awful writing choices frequently (literally the entirety of s7 is proof of that) and they have jumped through hoops to avoid buddie canon countless times— there is nothing stopping them from doing it again.

and this idea that just because they’re talking about buddie openly must mean they’re going canon is ridiculous. the short is reaching the end if it’s run; if it even gets renewed past s8, it’s very unlikely that they’ll go past s10 at the longest. they just moved to a new network, baited the fuck out of buddie pre-s7 and then didn’t give us anything and people are still watching. they know that as long as people think there’s a possibility of buddie canon that they’ll watch the show— it’s textbook queer/shipbaiting. 9-1-1 is not immune to this just because they’ve said “we don’t want to be accused of queerbaiting” in the past. we’ve reached a point where the network queerbaiting won’t cause enough backlash to warrant them being cautious anymore. it’s a dick move, yeah, but these creators are in this job for one thing: money. they have proven they don’t actually give a fuck about meaningful storytelling. it’s why they rely on cheap drama and shock value to get by bc they know people will tune in anyway.

i completely understand wanting to be hopeful and optimistic. i will forever be hopeful for the day that buddie finally go canon (although i hope they ditch the mustache before then because i don’t want to think of my alcoholic uncle when i see eddie kiss buck for the first time) and when it does i will be so fucking happy after waiting for 6 years.

but that’s the thing. i have waited for 6 years. i’m tired of getting my hopes up each season bc “guys this is literally the closest we’ve ever been there is no way they aren’t going to go there now” just to get slapped in the face by the showrunners and writers. i’m not going to get my hopes up about it just to be let the fuck down once again. and frankly, i don’t wanna see the fallout when we are let down again because people decided to convince themselves that it was 100% for sure set in stone happening when in reality it’s really not.

[laeana]

I'm glad more people think like me. The l*stappen are really funny. I've never seen anyone try so hard when the drivers are so obvious that they barely interact. And the l*stappen keep accusing maxiel's relationship of being a PR stunt. It's so pathetic. I like charles and pierre because their story is so sweet to me. But these people keep belittling pierre and charles' relationship. The l*stappen are like weird cultists who believe in their own assumptions and deny the truth right in front of them.

Some people have accused maxiel of being WHAT?? Color me shocked, I’ve never seen that but it kinda makes me have a laugh. Maxiel has really shown a relationship that has survived to time, they were teammates but not only, they kept in touch even after that.

Lestappen, on the other hand, we can’t even say it’s a PR stunt because their interactions are quite sparse. They interact when they’re on the podium together okay. Just like they do with every driver. They did some karting together, okay. I’m pretty sure Max and Charles also competed against other drivers.

Maxiel has had way more history, moments and interactions. There’s a reason why maxiel had also been so liked, it’s because Max and Daniel are really comfortable with each other, but sure it’s just a “PR stunt”.

It also saddens me like you say that Pierre and Charles’ relationship is belittled. There’s often the argument of “they’re best friends” to say they can’t be romanticized and that lestappen is somehow the “true” way. Okay, do you know the amount of series/medias/books who used the they’re best friends excuse to stop queer relationships and even queerbait?

I won’t call people who ship lestappen cultists but of course they see reality the way they want and certainly ignore what doesn’t fit their vision. Every shipper does this, that doesn’t mean however that I’ll ever understand them.

Don’t worry anon, you’re definitely not alone! And I’m sure we’re not either, even if we’re probably a minority.

[bubbles-is-hardcore]

Okay y’all I’ve seen multiple posts now about how “dumb” it is that Sylki has had limited to no romantic/soft moments and they’ve only been fighting this season while Lokius has had a ton of nice romantic moments and like??? Yeah??? It’s almost like if a ship is going to be endgame or canon it would make sense to build up a positive relationship.

I saw one post say it was stupid that Lokius has gotten so much attention over Sylki when “we all know it’s not going to happen”. Why do we all know it’s not going to happen? Because it’s a mainstream character in a big franchise in a gay ship? Even though that character has been confirmed bi over and over again in the source material and beyond? That’s exactly the problem.

I just think it’s very telling that the straight ship’s own shippers acknowledge that there is no real romance between them this season and they are in two completely different places in terms of character development, goals, needs, etc, and still shit on the gay ship and complain that their relationship is being focused on too much by the show because “it’s not going to happen”.

It’s a really bad case of queerbaiting and they are mad at the wrong people. The fans of Lokius aren’t what’s making Sylki bad. The studio knows Sylki was less popular after last season and leaned into Loki and Mobius. The fact that they won’t follow through is entirely on the studio, not Lokius shippers.

Now all of this to say, I’m VERY skeptical of Lokius going any sort of cannon. I honestly think the best we can hope for is the tried and true ol’ “ambiguous ending” That so many studios go for in this situation. I got my clown shoes on and I’m honking my nose but it is what it is.

[thealogie]

Remember that joke tumblr post that was like

"Terry, on his death bed, told Neil to make the greatest queerbait adaptation the world's ever seen"?

Not to parasocialize this awful man but like that joke made me think harder today and like

Neil offering to step back entirely so S3 can still happen, even with his MASSIVE ego, is also probably to assuage his guilt of tainting Terry's legacy.

Like he's gone on and on about how he made sure this happened For Terry. Because Terry asked him to on his death bed etc.

He is the worst and he will likely get paid additionally either way. But honestly? I do think of the Terry of it all. And I'm sure he is too, if he has a crumb of humanity left in him.

I heavily doubt he will take a full severance (no further payment) but if any article says that he will, I'm certain this is why.

I'm not trying to be #conspiracy at all but I really do wonder

I think you’re right that it probably played into Neil’s thinking but as someone who is a fan of Terry’s work I have to be honest I simply do not get the “Terry’s legacy” “do it for Terry” vibes that have overtaken this discourse. He’s dead? He won’t know? his legacy is totally fine because he wrote a beloved series that has nothing to do with this book.

[girl4music]

I once heard the term “straightbaiting” in regards to ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’. As in, what we queer people get in another show where there’s queerbaiting. But with Xena it’s just with the opposite sex instead. And that’s accurate because the central relationship in ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’ is Xena and Gabrielle. The show revolves around both of them as main characters and their love relationship - be it platonic or romantic.

Every other episode in the earlier seasons they would bring in a male love interest for either one of them (later in the show they would also get female love interests as well as male love interests; Gabrielle - Najara, Thalassa, Brunhilda. Xena - M’Lila, Lao Ma and, ugh, Akemi) but none of these love interests lasted. They would either die, leave or otherwise just never show up in the show again. They were either always temporary fill ins/stand bys until the other main character returned or used as a relationship conflict between Xena and Gabrielle, basically stating and showing how unnatural it was for either of them to have any sort of love relationship going on when it’s not with each other. And whenever this happens, the show itself feels shaky and off-kilter: unbalanced.

In a sense,… not straight. It feels not straight for it to be straight. It feels fake. It feels abnormal. Wrong. Exactly the way a queer person is supposed to feel when it’s queerbaiting in a primarily straight show. Straightbaiting in Xena feels like that to a straight person because Xena is genuinely a queer show and, therefore, in that show,… Queer is right. Queer is normal. Queer is real. And even with the female love interests - it still feels that way because, again, the central and most important relationship is X and G!

So ‘straightbaiting’ is absolutely the most accurate term to describe what the experience of ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’ is rather than queerbaiting because it’s not Xena and Gabrielle that is the bait. It’s everyone else. And this is especially true with the male love interests. Except maybe Ares. But that’s a whole other topic altogether that takes understanding Rob Tapert’s mind, who is genuinely team X and G all the way but just has hang ups with X and A. I won’t go into it here.

But yes, it also boggles my mind something awful when anyone watching Xena today could call it queerbaiting. It’s honestly the entire opposite. You can’t watch episodes like ‘When Fates Collide’ and ‘Who’s Gurkhan’ and hell, even Season 2’s ‘The Quest’, without realizing that the creators are genuine with how they write Xena and Gabrielle’s relationship. It’s not a joke. It might have started out as one but pretty damn quickly they changed course and it became serious. So serious that almost every other relationship for Xena or Gabrielle feels like a joke. Feels like it is the bait that keeps straight people tuned into watching a queer show about queer characters the way straight characters acting queer are the bait for queer people to watch a straight show.

And I cannot put it anymore concisely than that. That IS ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’. It is a straightbaiting show. So much so that Lucy and Renee have laughs about it. These are two straight women taking the piss out of the show’s attempts to keep its straight audience. Laughing about how unnatural it all feels for Xena and Gabrielle to have “straight” love relationships, proving my point completely true without knowing it. And I’m emphatically saying this as a queer woman myself that headcanons Xena as bisexual. Still queer but not gay. It feels extremely wrong for Gabrielle to be doing this. But it doesn’t ever matter because it doesn’t ever last. What lasts is the central relationship. That of X & G.

So regardless whether the nature of Xena and Gabrielle’s relationship is platonic or romantic, the creators are purposefully telling and showing you all love interests or love relationships besides theirs fail in comparison. And that’s not a very “queerbait-y” thing to do, is it? That’s actually the opposite of queerbait.

[mynameismckenziemae]

She’s a Fire-Chapter XV

Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x OFC/Reader (no use of y/n)

Hotter than Hell

(previous chapter here, next chapter here)

Warnings: mutual masturbation, pretending to be into your BFF to tease your men…so queerbaiting I guess? Sending dirty pictures, unintentional orgasm denial, etc.

Three days pass in radio silence and it’s killing you. Sunny does her best to keep you distracted but she works 12-hour shifts with virtually no phone access.

10 PM on Thursday, you finally get a text.

Bradley: Hey, sweetheart. Sorry to text instead of call, but I’m sharing a room with Bobby and it’s lights out, so we’re both stuck in here. How’re you?

You laugh, knowing what he’s hinting…Please don’t turn me on right now.

Rowan: It’s okay, I understand. I’ll send you my dirty pictures next time. I’m good, just missing you. How are you?

Bradley: Can’t fucking wait. I haven’t gotten off since we left. They’ve been running us ragged. I’m so tired. Bob doesn’t cuddle like you. He’s all ‘Get off me…’ Why are you hard?’

Rowan: LOL, why do I feel like you’re not kidding though?

Bradley: …

Bradley: Kidding. Seriously, Sunny would kill me if I touched Bob (and didn’t let her watch).

Rowan: Wow…same though.

Bradley: Oh yeah?

Rowan: Definitely. I’d be ticked if I missed you getting dicked down by Bob. 😏

Bradley: No, it’d be the other way around. I’d be doing the dicking-downing or whatever.

Rowan: Not a chance. 😂

Bradley: Wow.

Bradley: Damn it, times up. Hopefully, it won’t be too long before we talk again. Love you, see you soon.

Rowan: I love you too, get some sleep.😘

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Even though Bradley keeps a tidy home, you spend Saturday doing a deep clean. You find some photo albums in the attic when you bring a box of your things up, not sure yet if you want to donate it yet or not.

Tears fill your eyes as you flip through the photos. There’s one of Carole holding teeny-tiny Bradley in the hospital, tired but glowing. The next one has the tears spilling over—Nick’s holding him, terrified but excited. You laugh at the one of Bradley on his first birthday, frosting all over his face and curly hair, grinning at the camera.

Your smile falls a few pages later when you see Bradley alone in front of his dad’s coffin, saluting. You turn the page, a wave of nausea hitting you imaging your own child in the same position. The next photo is at least a year or two later and you swallow your sob, knowing Carole was probably so devastated and overwhelmed trying to take care of herself and Bradley that capturing memories with pictures wasn’t even a thought in her mind.

You decide that’s enough for now and put everything back where it was and head back downstairs to finish cleaning.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Sunny picks you up on Sunday for brunch and wedding discussions. She and Bob picked a date next fall back in Minnesota when the leaves should be at their peak color.

Sunny snorts as you show her your conversation from the other night with Bradley about her and Bob. “Agreed. Bradley would definitely be the one bottoming.”

After eating and a few drinks, you both decide to shop off your slight buzz (in truth, neither of you wants to go back to an empty house).

“Ooo, let’s stop here, I want to pick something pretty up for under my bridesmaid dress for Jake and Nat’s wedding,” Sunny says, opening the door to a fancy lingerie boutique.

You laugh, but follow her in. Never should’ve let Sunny have that second tequila sunrise.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Maybe shopping wasn’t a good idea, you think as Sunny tosses items at you to try on.

There are only two fitting rooms and one is occupied so you share the vacant one as it’s roomy enough for two, and the girl at the counter barely looked up from her phone when you walked in.

It’s pretty in the dressing room; walls painted a dark burgundy, accented with a baroque chair and flattering lighting.

“You know what would be fun? To send the boys some sexy pictures of us together in here. I’ll put this little robe on for the ones we sent to Bradley and you can for the ones I send to Bob…?” Sunny asks in a whisper, checking her reflection in the mirror.

Apparently, tequila does more to Sunny than make her clothes fall off. But…it’s not a bad idea. Bradley would lose his mind.

“I like the way you think” you whisper back with a wink.

Sunny wears white, while you’re in black

You take a few photos of her alone; your favorite is her kneeling, eyes closed and your manicured thumb is pressing on her bottom lip. She then does the same for you.

“Go bend over that chair, arch your back, look over your shoulder at me….yeah like that, bite your lip now. Perfect! Bradley is going to die. Look at that butt!” She whispers excitedly, showing you what she snapped.

Next, you set your phone on the shelf and hit the timer for the ones of you together.

You put on your robe and then start behind her, one hand on her lower stomach, the other skimming her cleavage, eyes half-lidded on each other. You step around to her side, hands still on her body as you press your lips to her neck. A few more positions and then you switch; you drop your robe as she dons hers.

You start off the same way, her hands skimming over your body, she takes it a hair further and puts her fingertips in the tops of the lacy underwear, “Hey, buy my dinner first.” She snorts, causing you to laugh.

You take a few more, lips almost brushing in a near kiss before turning to her side and rotating you around, so your ass is to the camera. You bite your lip to not laugh as she squeezes a handful of your ass. “I’m straight but your ass is making me question things.” She whispers before delivering a hard open hand smack to your cheek.

“Jesus, Sun,” you whisper, trying not to laugh too loud, “You’re gonna get us kicked out!”

“Nah we’re fine. Wait, don’t move. I’m gonna take a picture of my handprint.”

You can’t help but laugh, and let her, knowing Bradley will like it.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

You both end up buying what you had on for your impromptu photo shoot and a few things more. The girl at the counter didn’t comment on the fact that you were both in the same fitting room for 45 minutes; you weren’t sure she even noticed.

You two sit in the car and go through the pics, giggling as you send them to her.

“I’m not sure I should even send these…” Sunny laughs as she pulls out of the parking lot.

“What?! Why not? It was your idea!”

“I’m kidding. I’m so sending them. I may regret it though when I can’t walk the day after Bob gets home.”

You laugh. “Same.”

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Later, you smile as you hit send, hoping you don’t have to wait too long before you can talk again.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

“Your 2 hours start now!” Cyclone yells.

Bradley heads to the common room, giving Bob privacy in their bunk room for the first hour. His phone is vibrating nonstop, incoming messages all coming in at once as it powers on.

Sitting on a chair, he pulls out his phone and scans the room—nearly empty save for a few others scattered around.

Rowan: Dirty pictures as requested, featuring a special guest.

What the…oh my fucking God, Rowan, he thinks as he clicks on the first picture of you, his cock hardening in an instant.

He slowly flips through them, looking you over in pretty lingerie, nearly swallowing his tongue as he sees one of you bent over the chair, looking at him so innocently over your shoulder, worrying your lip between your teeth.

He discreetly adjusts (palms) himself as he finds the first one with your “special guest”.

It’s his oldest friend clad in a silky robe. Sunny’s a beautiful woman, but he’s never been attracted to her.

There is definitely something attractive about the way she’s touching you though, skimming her fingers over your breasts. Holy shit, her fingers are almost in your panties.

He groans at the next one but covers it (poorly) with a cough. Sunny’s got a handful of your perfect ass. You’re looking at each other’s lips like you’re about to kiss.

His cock twitches and precum leaks as he swipes to the final one. A close-up of Sunny Girl’s handprint on your butt, the red a stark contrast to the pale skin.

40 minutes later he realizes he could’ve been talking to you this whole time.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

You reach for your phone as a text comes through.

Bradley: Your pictures had me so distracted I forgot I could text you for the last 40 minutes.

You laugh as you type a response.

Rowan: Sorry?

Bradley: Don’t be. You are the most breathtakingly beautiful, sexy, gorgeous, hot, woman I’ve ever seen.

Bradley: Sorry, that wasn’t even remotely smooth, lol. I don’t even know what to say. All the blood from my head is in my dick, which is gonna fall off soon if I don’t get to jerk off.

Rowan: Lol, thank you. You’re always smooth. 😉Wait, you still haven’t been able to? It’s been almost a week.

Bradley: No. Shared bunk rooms, shared showers, shared fucking everything. There’s always someone around. We have phones until 9 so Bob’s in there now, we’re gonna switch at 8.

Rowan: 11 minutes and you’ll be able to. I’ll even let you watch me.

Bradley: I can’t fucking wait. Is the vibrator charged? I want to see you use it.

Rowan: Yep, charged it after I used it last night.

Bradley: Oh, don’t even say that. I’m gonna end up jizzing in my pants.

Rowan: Again? 😬

Bradley: Ha. Ha. So fucking funny. 🙄

Rowan: I thought so. ☺️

Bradley: I’m heading back, I’ll call you in a few.

Rowan: Can’t wait.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

A red-faced Bob is coming out just as Bradley approaches the door.

“Sunny send you pictures too I take it?” Bradley asks.

“Yeah. Never thought I’d be okay seeing someone else touch her but…Jesus Christ,” Bob says, running his fingers through his hair. Bradley’s never seen him flustered like this.

“Yeah, I hear ya,” Bradley says, slapping him on the shoulder as he walks into their room, locking the door behind him.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

You answer on the first ring, grinning when you see his handsome face and bare chest.

“Poor Bob looked like he was put through the wringer” is the first thing Bradley says, smiling when he sees you.

“Hey, it was Sunny’s idea…after we had tequila sunrises with brunch” you laugh, “I wore a robe for the ones she sent to him, just like one she wore” you assure him.

“Eh, I wasn’t worried. We share everything else nowadays.” He jokes, winking at you.

“Oh yeah, Sunny and I talked about it and she agrees, by the way. You’d definitely bottom if you two were to get together.”

He scoffs, offended. “Whatever.”

“Sorry babe, you just give off that submissive vibe” you tease.

“I’ll show you submissive.” He says, changing his tune, “Get naked. Now.”

“Yes sir,” you reply sarcastically but oblige.

You set your phone on the nightstand and strip quickly before flipping back on the bed.

“Good girl,” he says lowly, and a shiver crawls up your spine. “Now tease those pretty nipples for me. Yeah, like that. Pinch ‘em too…good.” He tells you, his voice rough. You can hear he’s starting to touch himself too.

“I wanna see all of you, baby, please?” You ask, still playing with your nipples.

“Yeah, hang on,” he says, setting this phone above him so you can see more of his stomach and his hand stroking his erection.

You sigh as you watch him. Out of all the things you’ve done together, this is the first time you’ve watched each other masturbate.

“Your body is incredible Bradley,” you say, fingers now circling your clit. You pick up the vibrator from the nightstand, turn it on, and replace your fingers with it. “God, just look at you.”

He groans, hating and loving your words. He’s so worked up from not cumming in a week, especially after getting off at least twice daily in the 10 days before deploying.

“Row, fuck, I’m sorry but I’m close already. I want you to get there first. Can you do that?” He pants, cheeks ruddy as he fists himself.

“Yeah, I’ll try,” you say, pushing two fingers in and pushing the vibrator setting higher. “I can’t wait to have you inside me,” you whine, curling your fingers and finding your G-spot.

“I’m almost there-almost…I-I…” you can’t finish your sentence as your orgasm hits you, whimpering as you do. It feels so good but it’s not the same without him here.

You notice he’s quiet you catch your breath, not yet able to open your eyes. “Bradley, did you cum?”

No response. You open your eyes and your phone is black. You pick it up and turn the screen on.

The call was disconnected.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

“Row? Can you hear me?” Bradley pants, so so so close as the screen going black.

“Are you still there? Fuck!” He growls, picking up his phone to call you back. But it’s no use. ‘No service’ is all that comes up when he tries.

He hears frustrated voices in the hall, so he’s not the only one affected. He looks down at his throbbing erection and sighs before pulling his pants back on, hoping to find out what’s going on so he can call you back.

Bob is about to knock as he opens the door.

“Something was detected on sonar, so they cut the phones early. I got a text out to Sun before mine went, I’m sure she’ll let Row know.”

“Thanks, man”, he says flopping back on his bunk, reciting the flight manual in his head to get his cock back under control.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

A/N: I hope the queerbaiting doesn’t offend anyone—if you read Sunny’s story, you’ll see that she (like Rowan) gets off on teasing her man and loves turning him on at inappropriate times (can you tell I like it too?) I am pro-LGBTQI.

Tagging:

@its-the-pilot

@dizzybee03

@sweetwhispersofchaos

@shanimallina87

@blindedbythelightt

@getmyprettynameoutofyourmouth

@lexixstewart

@phoenix-rising-starbird-one

@mrsrobertfloyd

@charmedkim

@k-k0129

@bellaireland1981

@ingoaliesitrust

@hookslove1592

@amiets2

@nero4te

@eli2447

[zethhazloutay]

CW: Talk about BBgate, Larries, Antis and fandom behaviours, don’t like, don’t read.

Take care everyone, I will block any negative interaction bcs I like my mental health, if you have a different point of view and are able to share with respect I would love to talk about it as long as it’s not an attack on any demographic, read it all so the conversation adds up.

Expecting H and L to come out and be public is as bad as calling them queerbaiters.

Expecting L to confirm bbygate is as distasteful as constantly probing a non-traditional family by claiming their family dynamic is not valid.

Forcing an specific queer label on them is as gross as dying on the hill that they can’t be anything but straight.

Expecting H or L to debunk their romantic relationships stunt is as disrespectful as thinking every woman their work with is their beau/beard. Stunt work is part of their work, both parties of a stunt relationship consent to it and get something out of it, the real relationships behind the screen could be anything from workplace companionship to love.

Claiming and modelling L and H relationship status to your fantasies is as bad as projecting hetero-monogamy in them.

Being a Larry truther is as toxic as being an Anti, since these both groups tend to think their lives and carrers revolve around a fan-theory for good or bad.

Even if all the theories where real or false ( I think the most important part about this is having an open mind to any possibilities) there are tons of behaviours that are disgusting by all parts of the fandom (solos ot5, Antis, Larries, Buzzings) and it’s important to remember that is fun to be part of something but we have to remember we are not entitled to ANYTHING as their fans.

Growing up, being able to have meaningful IRL interactions, grow apart from the fandom and ‘touch some grass’ made me revisit Louis words about Larry and realise what they try to convey a communicate.

“People can believe what they want to believe even if it is bs and they are so connected to their beliefs that they won’t see other realities what I don’t like is when their beliefs transpire in invasive IRL nasty behaviours”

What this tells me is he doesn’t not give a fuck abt Larries since they are not by any means his ‘golden fan base’ or the ‘rotten fan base’ (despite what any Larry or Anti says). He cares however abt the real life consequences that have bleed from crazy ass people, because again, no matter the ‘proverbial truth’ (that he has only given by voice is ‘false but you can believe in it if you want [weird response but ok]’ ) he will never give pats in the back to people that have time and time again be the headquarters of invasive behaviours that he will never want or approve, queer or cishet, with H, E, single or with another person, proudly out or closeted. He does not address toxic behaviours in the fandom because he knows that a handful of people doesn’t represent all there is to the fan base, but we know that if he notices something he doesn’t like he will call it out.

This text it’s not for making anyone feel bad or guilty (Unless you stalk people around them or other parts of the fandom) is for anyone who might suffer of ‘Parasocial Stan Larry/Anti syndrome’ to realize that it REALLY DOESN’T MATTER we don’t need to know every single thing or defend any rich popstar of their own doings. We need to enjoy music, touch grass, hydrate, talk to our loved ones and uplift the joy in our lives and fandoms, unlearn toxic behaviours and be kind. We can all be delusional, wrong, bigots, selfish, hedonist and parasocial, but the important thing is to identify our own bluff and stop it, to understand everyone does/believe things for a reason and it’s not our place for us to berate each other but to give space for possitive things (pride flags, respect for privacy, fan fiction [most say is deranged but ff is what keeps creativity and writing alive and honestly, is not harmful at all if we all follow the etiquette] ,fan projects, friendship bracelets, cute and respectful interactions, taking care of each other, accept we all have a space in the fandom and it’s not a race of ‘the best fan’).

[buddiesmutslut]

The real question here is........ Is ABC really better than FOX? Or are they just better at making money and doing PR, knowing their market? Yes Buck is now canonically bi, but that's not to say that buddie will be canon and they know that Bi buck flares up the belief that it will. I don't know, my trust in them is waning, because it's not the first time they to promotion with buddie and then cut the scene or part of it. It's feeling an awful lot like ship and queer baiting, especially since the majority of the PR content was buddie.

You said it, anon. Obviously, I know Buddie isn’t a guarantee. We all know this, but it certainly FEELS like it is. It feels like every other slow burn, enemies to lovers, will-they-won’t-they love stories on television, other than the fact that it’s queer. The hints & the subtext & the screen time & the partnership & every single other thing that has been talked about & dissected a million times over, it all points to a love story.

At the end of the day, ABC is just like every other corporation in this capitalist hellscape - their main concern is making money, & maybe they don’t care how they do it 🤷🏼‍♀️

Honestly, I’m not informed enough to speak on the queerbaiting angle, but ship-baiting??? It’s kind of hard not to see that. At the same time, I don’t see how they can make the choices they have with this pairing and then NOT have them end up with each other. So much of their history only really makes sense if there are feelings there, but who knows. I’m just a random woman on the internet screaming into the void lol.

[deer0skullz]

Does anyone else feel like Umbrella Academy, What We Do in the Shadows and Our Flag Means Death went down very similar paths or is that just me?

To preface, this is mostly based on how I felt as I watched the shows but also on some of the opinions I picked up from the fandoms.

Also, I’m not going to go back and rewatch all of these shows for the sake of a Tumblr post so I’m working from memory and if you feel like I’ve misremembered any of the plot/ characters let me know.

1. Started as well-received and highly acclaimed live-action fantasy shows with ensemble casts.

Based on my own opinions and what I remember from other fans, UA seasons 1-2 were fairly well received, as were WWDITS seasons 1-3/4 and OFMD season 1.

They’re all definitely different genres of fantasy but I’d say they still all fit under the label. And they obviously all have ensemble casts, with the Hargreeves in UA, the vampires (and Guillermo) in WWDITS and the pirates in OFMD. Even though the plots and characters can be quite different they all have similar vibes.

2. Noted for having open queer representation.

Klaus and Viktor in UA, pretty much the entire main cast of WWDITS, and multiple main characters in OFMD.

3. Tied to already established and respected creators.

UA is based on the comics written by Gerard Way who, of course, is also well known for My Chemical Romance. WWDITS is based on the film by Jermaine Clement and Taika Waititi, who are both executive producers of the show. Taika was also involved in OFMD as the actor for Blackbeard and as an executive producer. He has his name tied to many acclaimed films like Hunt for the Wilderpeople, Thor Ragnorok and Jojo Rabbit.

These are obviously not the only famous people tied to these projects but it’s just a sample of the talent involved in these shows. I feel like the fact that there was so much talent working on these shows makes my next point more interesting.

4. Experienced drops in quality and/ or introduced problematic elements that caused fans to lose interest or respect.

Again, this is opinion based and if you still liked the shows during these seasons then more power to you.

My overall feeling about all of these shows is that they lost a lot of the joy from their initial season(s) as they went on. Like, they just got significantly less fun to watch. But they also had more specific individual issues that I would like to get into.

I stopped watching UA during season 3 and don’t plan on watching season 4. I feel like a lot of people will already know what I might be referring to with this but yeah, the scene where Allison *did that* to Luther made me so sick. I feel like that season absolutely destroyed her character, and as I said, it just wasn’t anywhere near as fun as seasons 1 or 2.

WWDITS is probably the most successful of the three in my eyes but I could still apply the same argument about loss of enjoyment. The “Guillermo wants to be a vampire” plot line got very stale for me, especially with how they “resolved” (?) it. Saying “oh he’s a vampire now oh nevermind he doesn’t actually like being a vampire and also can’t be one anyway so everything’s back to normal” felt like such a waste of time for me. I know a lot of people also criticised the show for queerbaiting because of the Nandermo plot lines and teases. I wouldn’t necessarily call it queerbaiting but I would agree that the “will they, won’t they” is very played out at this point. Another big criticism I have of the later seasons is how Marwa was treated. The fact that she had no autonomy and was being forcibly changed mentally and physically to appeal to Nandor was treated as like, a running joke and I just found it kind of disturbing. Dark humour is pretty common throughout the show, but given how often her character appeared it felt a lot more, significant than throwaway jokes about drinking human blood. I feel like they could have done so much better with her character.

OFMD is probably the most egregious example of the 3. Season 2 was just not good. I’m not saying it was the worst thing I’ve ever watched but it was incredibly disappointing. The pacing was off, the characters were off, the dynamics were off. It was all just very off. The huge cliffhanger ending with Evil Blackbeard felt like it was resolved way too quickly and everything else in the season felt equally rushed. A lot of the character dynamics, but especially Ed and Stede, just felt wrong to me. From what I understand there were production issues or something so I’m not saying the writers just woke up one day and decided to be bad at their jobs but I can only really judge a show by what I saw on my screen, and what I saw was so far removed from the quality of season 1.

5. Finished on a sour note.

UA ended after 4 seasons, with the fourth being released on Netflix today. I haven’t seen anything that indicates whether this was the intended endpoint or whether it was cancelled. WWDITS will end after season 6 which comes out in October. Again, I can’t find anything indicating whether this was the intended endpoint. OFMD was cancelled just a few months after the release of season 2 in October 2023.

I can’t tell other fans how they should feel but for me I’m incredibly disappointed that 3 shows I really enjoyed saw a gradual (or not so gradual for OFMD) drop in quality that ultimately culminated in them just… ending.

Like I said, I have no interest in US season 4, but I am still somewhat hopeful for WWDITS. I would be really happy if they could bring it back to what it was.

Conclusion

I don’t know what the point of writing this was other than the fact that I’ve always associated these shows as having the same vibes and I feel like it’s interesting that they have a lot of similarities and went down similar paths. Also I just like yapping.