#not only it smells bad but also ough

[sleep-nurse]

BACK FROM THE 2 MUSEUMS IT WAS AWESOME

i fucking hate this city tho gosh

[featherymainffins]

Kyle Gallner is somehow capable of looking both hot as hell and whiter than Wonderbread bread and twice as milquetoast at the same time. What do they keep doing with him on sets

[pineappleciders]

nightcord at 25:00 general relationship headcanons

A/N: i don't even know if there's an /reader side to this fandom. guys did you know i love analyzing characters

kanade yoiskai

she kinda has a hard time expressing it,, but she's a total sweetheart. like once you two get really close she gets really soft

kanade usually isn't one for things like close contact, but occasionally when she's worked herself to the bone she doesn't mind laying on your chest for a quick nap

she's kinda stressed out a lot, so she really appreciates neck massages and stuff. make her a cup of tea and she'll appreciate you forever (she probably won't drink it but it's the thought that counts)

needs constant reminders to eat and sleep and do basic functions. leave little sticky notes reminding her to brush her teeth!!!! she appreciates it deeply but doesn't show it very well

she likes to play her trauma off as something normal,, like if you worry about her she's genuinely confused like ???? is that not normal?????

she loooves flowers. loves to inspect and smell them. any flowers you give her go in a vase somewhere in her room,,, she likes to think it gives her room more life

although, you'll probably have to remind her to water them and let sunlight in.... she rlly wants to take care of them but forgets!!!

mafuyu asahina

ough. owwww. ouuuuch.

it's really difficult for her to open up!!! it'd probably only happen if you were to hear about her music,, ask her what it's about and she might just. break down

oh god. if you like. held her in your arms while she's crying. her parental issues are hitting HARD

she likes to get you flowers but only really does it on occasion! in all honesty she'd love to get you hand-picked flowers every single day but she finds it a little embarrassing to bring them to your locker in front of everyone

it's really hard for her to get situated into the relationship, patience and reassurance are everything 2 her. be genuinely kind and god it hurts her so bad

you take her to the aquarium whenever she's feeling down ... it always makes her feel a bit better . also all dates r aquarium dates no arguing

she likes to help you with homework, and if you're just too tired or worn out she'll even do it for you!! might tell you the next day that it was a one time thing that won't happen again (it will)

freezes up a little if you suddenly grab her hand, but eventually warms up to it and even starts subconsciously holding your hand when she's feeling on-edge or anxious

ena shinonome

ena is, admittedly, a bit scared of commitment. you might be at an awkward stage where you're not really sure whether or not the two of you are dating for awhile

even so, she's very supportive of everything you like. any sort of art, hobby, or music you're into she'll also get into in hopes of connecting with you

might post you on her social media!!! if you're camera shy she sneaks photos while you're not looking, but won't post them if you don't want her to (might on her priv tho)

she wants a lot of your approval, esp with her art. texts you drawings and asks for your honest opinion... she won't take a simple "it's amazing" for an answer

she wants you to criticize and give her advice ,,,, but she'll also get really sad if you do, so maybe it's better to just keep complimenting them . she acts mad abt it but is secretly happy you know her so well

she actually has always wanted to do sappy couple things,,, like watching movies together in bed or taking stupid photos with cheesy filters . might get a lil embarrassed if her friends find out

always takes photos of your food on dates (and sneaks a bite)

mizuki akiyama

mizuki loves to drag you around shopping at the mall . as soon as you think it's about to end they see another pretty store . it's a never-ending loop

she begs and begs for you to try on something she thinks you'd look cute in. you always give in just because it's practically mizuki's love language

you don't often find yourself doing stereotypical couple things with them . from an outside perspective it honestly might just look like you two are really good friends

but that doesn't mean they don't love you like that !! it's shown in other ways ... like sleeping over at your place for a week, or waiting at the bus stop for you every single day. or doing your makeup (even if you're a dude).

mizuki wants one thing and that's stability . to be confident that you two are never going to bicker or argue over stupid things ... or that you won't abandon her

she has a very hard time opening up. she'll tell you, eventually ... but the thought is scary. would you tell other people? would you leave them? would your relationship stay the same?

there's nothing mizuki appreciates more than you telling them that you'll stay, no matter what secret they might be hiding. even if she can't help but worry , knowing that your care is at least mostly unconditional is heart-warming

mizuki will appreciate every moment they have with you, for fear that one day you won't be here

[nyaskitten]

Movieverse Morro'd rule so fucking hard....

movie morro au where morro is literally a fucking criminal in juvie. it’s bad enough that lloyds the son of garmadon, his cousin is considered a mastermind escape artist who might be a high ranking gang member and has never gotten caught for a solid 3 years. no one knows how he does it. it’s like the air itself assists him in escaping

[slightly-gay-pogohammer]

As a non homestuck, what deos that mean👀

ough i wanted to be vague and quick but no i wasn't im so sorry fnsdmag tw for transphobia mostly i guess

homestuck ends. it's a somewhat open ended ending and they dont show the "proper" final battle, but it was implied in the comic already how it was going to go. a lot of people remained disappointed in that, but i personally think its a good one

people keep pestering hussie, creator of the comic, to continue the story

hussie, well known troll (haha) who more often than not both praised and made fun of the fandom directly in the comic, writes the epilogues. they're mostly awful and they're the umpteenth big fuck you to the fandom really; one is the "shipping" ending where everything goes bad bc everyone focuses only on shipping, the one is the "fighting" ending where everything goes bad and everyone fucking dies basically. it has some good ideas, there's more fourth wall breaking, but overall its an inconsistent sexist and misoginistic mess made out of spite by someone who clearly didn't want to work on homestuck anymore

it also features character assassination, be it "this character who's entire plot was about not wanting to be alone anymore is now a sex-crazed maniac who doesnt take no as an answer", "this character who was groomed all her life to be a dictator actually becomes hitler" or "this character who a lot of people hc as mtf is now ftm, but specifically in a timeline, in the other they still identify as female". you could argue it's bc the story is about one of the characters having a villain arc and managing to take control of the story and rewrite them, but he's also regressed to be someone who's obsessed with a character we were told he wasn't in love with anymore AND also says transphobic stuff so.

hussie actually opens the epilogues with one of the character saying pretty clearly that they're "beyond canon", and makes sure that everyone known that anything written outside of the comic itself, including sidecomics, videogames and the epilogues themselves, is as canon as you want it to be. unfortunately homestuck fans cant read and that + the fact that the epilogue end in a cliffhanger, homestuck 2 has to happen

hussie wants nothing to do with it and leaves the project to someone else. they give little to no details of the plot if not a few plotpoints, one of which being the fact that a character must be named yiffany

one of the people who was supposed to work on hs2 and the tie-in visual novel games "friendsim" starts fights with readers on twitter and is later on outed as a really bad person of the biphobic and ableist variety

on a minor note, some updates are patreon exclusive, and not in a "they'll eventually be posted" way, but in a "either you follow the patreon or you dont get the whole experience" kind of way

the story also has to follow the aformentioned sexist transphobic racist bullshit, to which they add terribly written "bury your gays" plot and also cheating!! no matter the timeline my girl kanaya gets shafted and cheated on and by now im gonna be real it really smells like lesbophobia in here

also futa jokes. like we all agree that the candy jade situation is fucked up right

in all of this, "what pumpkin" actually starts drama with a youtuber or something. idk. it's the team that sells the hs merch it's even more complicated. oh and also the videogame being so delayed that's a whole can of worms too.

anyway hussie actually says that they dont give a shit no more about homestuck and sell the rights to someone else. first thing we're told is that they're going to drop the 2 from the title of homestuck 2, turning it into homestuck: beyond canon. pretty much openly saying that no, this has nothing to do with homestuck, and it's officially Not Canon.

[quendiviner]

the whole mind body soul section for an oc of your choice :^)

YEAGHHHH THANK UUUU i'm gonna pick toby bc it's its bday tomorrow. so i am thinking about it JFJGKCNCK

super long oc ask game

What is a habit your character has that others might find cute?

HMMM taking naps? especially bc it is mostly sleeping curled up like a cat. Toby sleeps a lot because it's tired like, all the time? And thing is, it just can't sleep straight because it's limbs feel weird if it tries JFBNGKCNGN so it sleeps in the weirdest positions ever.

Are there particular sounds your character is fond of?

Tobias loves the sound keyboards make when you type hehehe <3 Birds singing, too, and the sound of leaves shaking in the wind. Really loves rain and thunder, could sit happily at its balcony and listen to them.

Is your character more prone to fight or flight?

Toby's typical response was fawn for a very long time, fitting its tendency to people please and its deer in headlights vibes. It does tend to flight more often nowadays and sometimes ends up in a fight response.

rest under cut:

Does your character believe in myths and fairy tales?

No! But Tobias does think that they are important bc of the life lessons you can pull out from them hehe :3

What words could tear your character down?

Honestly anything that hits its low self-worth. Doesn't even need to be anything big.

How well does your character act under pressure?

OUGH depends on the duration of said pressure. If it gets over in like a few hours or days max, it would be fine and it would actually make it more productive, which is why it tends to set own deadlines to actually get shit done. THOUGH, it may also get a bit, well, snappy and overly sarcastic if one were to come annoy it while it's working on something, or if someone's adding more pressure or just simply trying to annoy it. Like here, for example. It also feels really bad for that kind of action afterwards. Like, really bad. Toby doesn't like being rude.

As for pressure that stays there for a long time? If others look at it, Toby looks like it's doing fine, maybe a bit more twitchy and annoyed, less optimistic? If you look inside its head, though, the more pressure there is the more stressed and anxious it is, with gradually creeping paranoia and self-destructive behavior. Do NOT leave it in that kind of situation for a long time.

Is your character good at practicing self-care?

YEAGH self care georg. Put its wellbeing above its responsibilities very often (unless someone specifically asked it to do something). Never misses its skincare routines and daily showers, takes a lot of naps if needed, does things that make it happy. The only thing it could get better at though is, well, eating properly. Misses its lunches all the time.

What scents does your character find comforting?

Coffee! Toby really loves the scent of coffee and feels v nice bc of it hehe <3 One of the reasons why it has so many empty coffee cups laying around it's work desk.

It also likes the smell of cigarettes. Not when you smoke them but when they're unused. For some reason their scent is surprisingly comforting for Tobias 😭

It also likes the scent of ethanol a lot. Toby can sometimes be seen smelling it in a lab when it's having a bad day. People who happen to see it do that ignore it most of the time JFJGKKGNCNCN One of the reasons it's kinda sad it gets to hang out in labs much less nowadays now that it's a senior chemist and its schedule is mostly filled with paperwork and other kind of stuff.

Does your character have any allergies?

HAY FEVER ‼️ Gets runny nose and red eyes and stuff like that :/ And walnuts. Not dangerously, it can eat it them but gets this weird feeling in its mouth/throat if it does wnkfkgcnkckgnrk

Is your character a light, medium or heavy sleeper?

Light, gets woken up very easily from the slightest of noise or movement. Finds it hard to fall asleep again after that bc it will start worrying about waking up in the middle of the night 😭

Does your character have strong willpower?

Not unless it cares about things very strongly. Easily gives up or abandons things that it knows will take too much energy and resources to finish, thus making them not rational things to do in its opinion. If it's something it cares about, then it will definitely be determined to finish it, though maybe taking it slow and like, leaving things untouched for a while to focus on something else instead.

Is your character more likely to give advice or seek it?

Give advice! Tobias loves helping people and that's one of the ways it does it hehehe

How does your character relax?

Toby finds reading books very relaxing, and also enjoys video games and crafts a lot. Sometimes it ends up going to do some sports for fun, it really enjoys basketball, badminton and jogging (all of which are also bad for its knees, though. It doesn't care.)

Is there a secret thing your character longs to hear?

OUGH probably someone telling it that it's enough and doesn't need to try to be better at anything. Show it that it does not need to strive for the best results and that it is still a person worth caring about even if it doesn't do anything.

That it's loved or cared about, maybe? Especially back in its long hair era when it felt really lonely.

Does your character have a sleep routine?

In a way? It drinks a cup of tea like two hours before going to bed while reading or watching Klara's favorite tv show, then goes to bathroom to brush its teeth and do its skincare etc., and then goes back to do something relaxing. Sometimes it also eats a small snack in the evening.

Would your character feel confident in a fight?

No. It's running away. Please don't make it fight it sucks at it.

UM that said, Toby did ask Klara to like, teach it some moves in case something happens, and, well, I guess it could defend itself? Maybe.

Is your character more energized in the morning, afternoon or at night?

Afternoon! I'd say it's at its best from 2pm to sunset, then somewhat energized during evening/beginning of night. It has little to no energy during mornings and honestly has to fight itself to not to fall asleep during morning meetings.

How often does your character have nightmares?

Every now and then, not completely enough to say "often" but not so little to say "sometimes", either. Tobias tends to especially get them if it's sleeping alone (for example if Klara's on a work trip or something) or had a stressful day.

Are there scents your character dislikes?

Flowers JEJFJJFFJFK They're really strong and make its nose itch and head hurt.

Is there a fear your character wants to learn to overcome?

Fear of big bodies of water, or the ones where you can't see the ground 😭 The idea of swimming in the ocean sounds so fun until Tobias remembers that it is big and murky where it lives. Doesn't stop it from hanging out on the beach tho but man, it'd love to go run in the water w Klara.

If your character had to act in a play what role would they think they’d best perform?

Narrator! Toby's good at talking and can make the most boring stuff sound fun.

Does your character have a high pain tolerance?

BFBFJKFKFKF kinda? Um it has chronic pain that basically makes it barely able to walk properly, but if we're talking about things like, well, injuries and all then I'd say yes it does have a high pain tolerance.

[noamuth]

I've had to pick mushrooms out of my yard several days this week (we've been getting so much rain they just pop up overnight lkjhsfg)

and even with such small mushrooms you can definitely smell the.. well, shroomy smell. It's not necessarily bad (at least, not the average mushroom), but I can only imagine certain parts of the Underdark smell overwhelmingly musty and fungal

Also when mushrooms decay, they get... gross. I assume there are detritivores aplenty underground to take care of them, but in the mean time? ew

I imagine the bigger the mushroom, the woodier the stem out of necessity to hold the weight of their caps, so they live longer, like how the Zurkhwood is almost analogous to wood, itself. It must be a whole Event when a large mushroom falls naturally

Like, imagine if trees were a bit fleshy and when they rotted they got soft and stank. ough. no thanks. like a veggie whalefall underground

[crossover-enthusiast]

Do you have any more Werewolf Kevin or Rick thoughts? 🎤

OUGH- /POS

Thank you so much I love them

Under read more bc this got a little long!

9 times out of 10 Werekev is just a scared dog, he has NO idea what's going on and is running on instinct -- if he's not in his house, he usually goes to places that feel familiar to him like the Candy Club (which he immediately leaves bc the smell is unbearable) or Streber's house

Wererick meanwhile is just. Honestly a bear would be a better description for him, hah, he's HUGE. If he gets out of his house he just wanders around town looking for places to sleep, doesn't look for animals unless he's hungry. He's probably been confused for a bigfoot a few times

You know that one picture of someone pushing the center paw pad of a cat and the claws close in on the finger? Streber's done that to Kevin at least once

I'm absolutely stealing this from @jamsnax but when they're together and Rick is wolfed out, he'll pin Radford down under him. He originally did it bc Rad would annoy him in some way, but now it's just how he shows affection

Also! When the two started working together, Rick and Kevin had no idea the other was a werewolf. It was only when they both worked during a full moon (they both forgot, rip), the Werewolf Senses kicked in and Rick noticed how badly Kevin was suddenly doing that he was like "oh. huh."

What then followed were shenanigans and misadventures between the two wolfy bois -- Kevin was probably terrified of Rick at first bc of how big he was, meanwhile Rick was annoyed bc Kevin was being loud. By the end of the night however the two bonded quite a bit, and the next time they all hung out Rad noticed they were a lot closer than before

After the full moon they spent together, if they're not on their own they're with each other! They're like a pack at this point

Kevin gets more jumpy and easily aggravated as the full moon gets closer, while Rick grows more quiet and cagey

So continuing on a point above: Kevin is very much flight or fight/all bark and no bite, he won't attack unless he's sufficiently scared/angered, and when he does it's just to get the person to back off so can he flee.

Rick however... if you don't bother him he won't bother you, but he won't hesitate to bite or scratch, and unlike Kevin there's NO indication when you cross that line. And because he's so big, he hits and hurts a LOT. One time he almost took some guy's arm off (another thing I stole from jamsnax)

Also he's definitely killed a few deer

The transformation hurts. A lot. Kevin has cried during it a few times, and Rick gets really worn out (he needs a few minutes before he can use his hind legs bc of real bad growing pains)

On a lighter note, they both like pets :> Kevin is very receptive to it, while Rick SEEMS like he doesn't care, but his tags wags!

Kevin howls a lot, while Rick only howls under certain circumstances

Since Kevin does the leg shake even when normal I want Rick to have some kind of wolf/dog tick too, but I don't know what. Maybe a curious head tilt?

Kevin fur feels soft and fluffy, while Rick's fur is more dense and tangly

I also like to think that while they both have all of their senses heightened, particular senses affect them the most; for Kevin it's smell, for Rick it's sound

Radford and Streber definitely had a "wow I can't believe our boyfriends are both werewolves" conversation at some point

I want them all in a cuddle pile actually that would be so cute

As you can see, I care and think about them a normal amount

[armand-de-romanus]

tagged by @figsandphiltatos :)

shuffle your on repeat playlist (on spotify) and list the first 10 songs and then tag 10 people

First Time by Hozier -- Been listening to this one (and the album in its entirety) since last October and like much of Hozier, it spoke to me! I think my favorite part is about the flowers,,,, mothers gifting life to you again, how a plant lives mostly underground in the roots, deadened to light and sound but reaching for the light anyway, even when it's doomed to be cut back for its beauty?? how the plant knows it's dying but puts forth its every effort to make flowers anyway?? "fighting off like all creation the absence of itself, anyway" ANYWAY????? and the end hurts a special kinda bad ough! ough!

Sjamboksa by Gang of Youths -- god knows I love these boys, but this one is an unsung gem from their earlier albums. "In the thick of my heart, by the skin of my teeth, until I'm forgotten, and covered in weeds, and my withering soul is in the sea, i will hold on to you, hold on to me." It has a warm, heartful sound that gets me emotional

Keep Me In the Open by Gang of Youths -- not your typical love song. It's about a relationship in the end stages of failing. It's always been a heartbreaker, and I appreciate it filling an uncommon niche. "When did everything get this weird? how the fuck did it start? did you ever believe in me? was it always so hard?"

Welcome Home, Son by Radical Face -- I've loved this one since like 2018? or 2017? It's an EXCELLENT "thinking about your OCs" song with excellent vibes. Generally this band is good for this purpose, recommend their other stuff since I think this is their only big song. I enjoy Small Hands iirc. They have very visual lyrics that I can smell yk? "Sheets are swaying from an old clothes line, like a row of captured ghosts over old dead grass, was never much but we made the most"

Wildflower and Barley (Feat. Allison Russell) by Hozier -- This makes me think of Seurri and Erastos' year together in their mutual downtime, enjoying the glade together and Philander learning to be comfort in a gentle, quiet love. the fuck . the vibes are... like, jazzy and folksy. "springtime from my window, another month has not much longer now, the sun hesitates more on each evening's darkening, would all things god allows, remain above ground? like grief and sweet memory, wildflower and barley"

I Don't Know You by Mannequin Pussy -- Excellent intro to their show in Atl. Started us off easy for sure lol. It's soft, it's about regret, it's about knowing your regret and still being unable or unwilling to act on it i think. plus longing

Little Dark Age by MGMT -- I don't remember listening to this a ton recently but in general? yes. I'm claiming this one back from the fashy teens who wanna use it in ww2 edits, this song slaps severely and the dark and mysterious vibes speak to me. good for OC imagining lol "The humor's not the same, coming from denial" IDK if this song has a coherent meaning (ik MGMT can be cryptic) but I havent interpreted it and I like it that way frankly

Too Sweet by Hozier -- Who could have predicted! OHhh! who knew! This song is for Solomon and Solomon only idc idc idc idc "But you worry some I know, but who wants to live forever babe" like yess mercenary queen work i need you to concern your elf nobility non-wifey wifey endlessly

We Don't Believe What's on TV by Twenty One Pilots -- Middle school makes a bold return! I stopped listening to these guys before 2016 I think, but I got a hankering for this particular song because I'm so unsure of what I want to be or do, or if I can even be or do that. I want to be unafraid of the future with somebody and I don't think I could relate to this song in middle school but I get it now! Also I refuse to factor religion into my interpretation of top or I'll stop enjoying it again shh

Archie, Marry Me by Flyte -- This song is one I'd occasionally play on loop late at night, the echoing choir and soft, what, organ? in the background? If I had a wedding this would probably be in it. It's so warm and personal, but I love the original by i think Alvvays! This cover I just think I love more.

I don't think I have any steady mutuals who haven't already been tagged in figs' post so... like or rb this or otherwise let me know if you'd like to be tagged in anything in the future :)

[tonysaintborgi]

Feel free to respond tomorrow, I just don't wanna forget so I'm sending now!

I've tried products like that before but I'm not sure they work for me personally. To give a little insight into my particular flavor of ocd, I tier things into different categories of "dirty" and I cannot cross contaminate something cleaner with something dirtier, and it's hard for me to keep something like that in the clean category. I'm not sure why, maybe texture? My regular lotion is also hard and I have special protocols for it.

Tbh these loops come and go and I've never been sure how to break them. This one was triggered but they usually kinda just happen randomly

ough. well, again, perhaps this advice isn't as good as it could be, but after brainstorming I can think of a few ideas.

first, dr. bronners. i know, again, a product. and a soap at that! but here's what I Know: the secrets of life and love CAN be found on that label manifesto and if there was such a thing as a magic elixir it's bronners soap. every time I've had a skin irritation or anything, it really feels like bronners helps. put like a tablespoon of bronners into a squirtbottle and fill the rest with water and you'll have a perfect all purpose cleaner that you can smell. it certainly makes ME feel like things are just generally cleaner. again, this one may actually be bad advice for you, but I'm just throwing things at the wall and hoping they stick - and if they don't stick to the wall, at least, i got a reccomendation on what to use to clean that wall...

secondly, fight your impulses and brainrules with other impulses or brainrules. like that one post says, sometimes you gotta get a little ill to get well. make new rules! like "gross things cannot contaminate me without direct prolonged contact if I'm listening to the crisp clean sounds of Casiopea" - sure, it sounds stupid, but it may just work. and having to listen to Mint Jams when you wash your hands may sound annoying, but I'm assuming it's probably at worst an even trade-off for how annoying your brain is right now. and brains just fucking LOVE patterns like that. just keep telling it the smooth and crisp fusion vibes are part of cleanliness and they enhance the experience and fuckin... it might just eat it up!

third, a cleansing spell. mostly for the same reason as above. tell your brain you've not only physically cleaned the area but by lighting a few vibes candles and a temple incense you've also spiritually purified the area. help it feel like you're going above and beyond cleaning to scratch the itch(?).

equally, you could always purposefully go out of your way to make the area dirty, then clean it, to satisfy the need for cleanliness. again, scratching the itch. brain says that place is dirty even though logically it isn't? and cleaning a clean thing does fuck all. so maybe it's time to say, accidentally spill a can of tomato sauce or something and clean it up, showing brain that yeah dude the place IS clean

final idea, and perhaps the most hail mary remedial idea i can think of, is the Fast Tigers thing. squat/lay down (I'm assuming squatting is probably better in this situation) and tighten all of your muscles all over your body and hold for 5-10 seconds then release the tension. chemically tells your brain to chill.

again, idk how many of these will do you good, if any... i mean, I hope so! I hope something helps. I'll keep thinking, see if i can come up with anything. i haven't gotten stoned yet today so maybe something will come to me once I'm baked

[the-moons-not-haunted-you-are]

Oh geez it was one I listened to recently lol. Give me a moment I'll find it.

I'm gonna put quotes here as I feel like it just for funsies lol "Eh if diabetes was real I woulda died of it by now" - Chris, Jim Henson's Secret Plan

Oh yeah Chris canonically makes good brussels sprouts, how did I forget that.

"Help. Help. I'm smellin' names. And I'm---I'm. I'm hearin' smells." - Will, Jim Henson's Secret Plan

Oh man their whole bit about doing art as a job being hard is so good. Not in a funny way it's just good. I think about, [paraphrased] "If you want to get into music, don't quit your day job. Not because you'll fail, but just because you'll enjoy it more if you keep it as a hobby," all the time.

Oh fuck a fan called Will's parents' house one time. I can't tell if that's funny or awful; I think it's both.

Augh. Will's lozenge noises. Augh.

Ough Will's description of his really bad mental health moments... I don't think I've ever had it Quite that bad but Fuck, I've come close.

...How did I forget that this guy thought he was Jesus one time. No other comments, just wondering how I forgot that.

"No the starting a cult was actually a different time." - Will, Jim Henson's Secret Plan (Is this terrifying or hilarious? Don't ask me.)

"You are one of the most well-adjusted unstable people I know." - Chris, Jim Henson's Secret Plan (I have to admit I think about this quote a lot too)

"You got this nice house. Take That, Your Brain." - Chris, Jim Henson's Secret Plan

I love whenever Will refers to himself as gay or queer because he has a particular vibe where. I mean he only talks about women in a romantic sense in his songs, but he also talks about kissing boys in college and it's just. He's gay but he's also not gay. Me too, dude.

"Poor guy."

"Poor Alan Turing."

Huh. Is the way they say "horrible" a Jersey accent thing? A whole East Coast thing? Idk I'm from the PNW. They say it like "harrible" kind of and I'm a full "whore-ible" person.

Oh they're doing the Muppets bit now. I love this bit, but I'm just gonna skip past it, because it's too long for me to quote all the funny/interesting parts. I fucking LOVE it when they do character voices tho

Okay at like 30 minutes in they start answering questions, and I love it when they do that but. Again. Too many funny bits and bits that require too much context for me to quote/talk about, so I'm just gonna skip through them.

LOBSTERS UNDERSTAND THE DYNAMICS OF THE DOMINANCE HIERARCHY - will, as jordan peterson, as kermit the frog

Holy shitttt the part where they summon two Tom Waits. Fucking love this part dude.

"One of these kids sent me an envelope full of teeth." - Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

Oh man I remember this part. This is what kicks off Will's realization that he's a bone guy. This also the episode where he says something to the effect of, "Maybe I don't like it when people call me a gay vampire who's into bones because that's who I really am, and I don't like being seen." I think about that bit a lot.

"I do have a tupperware full of fragments of an actual human skull." - Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

"It looks like I really am the person who I hate being seen as being." - Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

"That's really what it is. I get frustrated with being confused for this gay space vampire obsessed with bones. Umm, and the reason I don't like it is just 'cause I don't like to be seen." - Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

"Shut the fuck up. William? Get it together. Shut the fuck up." - Chris, Every Rose Has a Gun (meanwhile Will is laughing in the background)

"This is a podcast about focus and drive and ambition and power and becoming the best version of yourself. With that in mind, 'How to get yolked in the apocalypse?'" - Chris, Every Rose Has a Gun (I wrote yolked instead of yoked because that's how he says it)

Lmaooo Chris whispering into Will's ear in the middle of the night that ghosts are very strong.

"Chris is one of the only people I've met who has a ghost without having died first." - Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

Oh fuck the Lola Bunny bits in this episode.

"Hold on I'm pulling up more motivational graphics. (mumbling a bit) Safe search: off. Aaaand lo..la..bun-ney...1996" - Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

"Listen... Listen. If you wanna criticize what conservatives are doing, you---you be my guest. But you wanna kinkshame all... kink. *snicker* kinkshame all of 'em? It's not necessary." - Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

"...and and y'know... near the end when we were watching Space Jam 1996, something Awoke in my friend William." "(laughing) That's a fucking bald-faced lie. You rat bastard. It awoke Early on in the film." - Chris then Will, Every Rose Has a Gun

HOLY SHIT CHRIS'S TOMMY LASAGNA VOICE. so good.

Oh. Yeah. The cocaine cum gutters. This was the question about pyramid schemes. With the callback to Leopard Planet. (sentences that have words people can understand individually, but not put together)

Why do they spend half the Big Carl episode talking about that Steven Seagal movie. That was an extremely rhetorical question. I know why, and I love it.

Ong how have I not posted this here yet

[strawberry-seal77]

guys want me to blabber about the cool book I read like 2 years ago. No? too bad!

SO it’s called Endling.

and ohhhh this one’s such a thing. I love it. Okay so there’s this species that can tell when a speaker is lying. It’s sort of like they can taste/smell it in the words. Also they can glide, this is important. The main character, Byx (who’s said endling, last of their species) got distracted and when they went back to find their group: oops they’re all gone.

The book starts with the definition of Endling and ough that hits hard. Byx goes into the city and does stuff. They end up getting chased because rare species (you know how it goes), and get cornered at the top of a building. But not! Because they jump out of a window and glide.

Anyways they meet a human and befriend them n stuff, and do a whole bunch of plot stuff. There’s also this scene of jumping off a cliff and gliding to save some creature that was being hunted, but I can’t remember when it happens. Eventually they get to some dock, and these creatures get a blood sample or smthn and are like “ye you’re good” so they go on. Get to a kingdom and like.. so they’re in trouble and the human makes a cover story, which the king looks to Byx to see if it’s true. And Byx lies. Byx LIES FOR THEIR FRIEND OMG..

More stuff happens idk and the end of the book Byx sees a moving island, and thinks they can see more of their species. So of course they’re SO excited, and decide to try and trust themself and run and leap and GLIDE. AND I NEVER GOT TO READ THE REST OF THE SERIES. THEY ONLY HAD ONE BOOK.

[kyouxa]

Diabolik lovers Chaos Lineage Shin Tsukinami (Labyrinth END)

Please no reposting onto other sites, ask me before translating this into another language too! If you enjoy these translations, please consider supporting me on ko-fi.

Place: Abandoned house — Inside

Shin: —That guy, Kino, isn’t here.

Yui: But this is literally the best place to meet up after this.

Shin: Right? He wasn’t in the cave either after all…

Yui: ...Do you think that he might have gotten caught by Carla-san?

Shin: You think he would make such an idiotic mistake?

Yui: You’re right. I’m sure he’s fine.

(...I really want to believe that, but my heart didn’t stop beating so fast for a while now)

*something thumps wood* 

Yui: Ah! I’m sure this is Kino-kun. Kino-kun, you’re finally back!

Eh… !

(Shin-kun, why did he grab my arm so suddenly!?)

*Shin sniffs*

Shin: …..

Yui: (He’s smelling the air… ? So this isn’t Kino-kun… is it?)

Shin: That’s bad. This smell — it’s my brother!

Yui: ...Nn!!

Carla: As expected, you were indeed hiding here.

Shin: ...Brother!!

Yui: (What’s that supposed to mean? Did Kino-kun tell him about this place?)

Carla: Go on, you will hand Eve over to me, no?

*draws sword*

Shin: I won’t! Brother, I can’t let you go on like that.

Yui: Shin-kun…

Shin: Yui, step aside.

Yui: ...Nn.

(Is he really going to fight against Carla-san? So you’re not going to avoid physical conflicts anymore?)

(But do the both of them really have to settle this with a battle—!?)

Shin: I’m almost out of time...

Yui: (Shin-kun! So he’s really going to confront Carla-san!?)

Shin: ...I won’t hand her over. At least not her — brother!

Yui: (Shin-kun also suddenly held up a dagger!)

Carla: Well then, prepare to die here.

*swords clash*

Shin: Ngh!

Yui: Shin-kun… !

Carla: Hmph, you are not equal to me at all. 

Shin: Haa, Haa, Haa…

Yui: (He’s pushing himself over his limits. And yet he’s still trying his best to protect himself from Carla-san’s attacks)

Carla: All you do is run around trying to escape from me.

Shin: ...Haa, Haa… brother

Carla: Silence.

*sword pierces Shin*

Shin: Ahhh… !

Yui: Stop it!! Shin-kun… !

Carla: Die for good!

Shin: —Agh!

*pulls sword out*

Shin: Kch — Ngh!

Yui: Carla-san… !! Please… stop this… !! At this rate, Shin-kun might… !! 

Shin: Ugh… agh…

*Shin falls down*

Yui: Shin-kun… !!

Shin-kun!! Please!! Open your eyes, please… !!

(This can’t be… why did something like this have to happen… !?)

(Does he actually yearn for ending it all by killing his younger brother, without any resistance at all?)

(Shin-kun wished for nothing more than Carla-san to remember everything and return to his usual self—)

Carla: Hmph, how childish.

Shin: Bro… ther…

Yui: (Shin-kun’s already completely worn-out because of his credulity. Just stop it! Stop this madness—!!)

Carla: Right in time, Eve.

*Carla grabs Yui*

Yui: Agh!

(Carla-san is pulling my arm so forcefully!)

Shin: Let her… hand go…

Yui: Please let me go, Carla-san!

Carla: Come, I will guide you to my mansion.

Yui: …Nn! No… ! I don’t want to… ! 

*Yui struggles*

Yui: (But even if I resist, I still can’t break free—!)

Shin: Don’t go… with him… wait… kch...

Yui: Shin-kun… !

(Shin-kun’s reaching out for me. But even if I try to do the same…, I can’t reach him—!)

Shin-kun… ?

Shin: …..

Yui: Shin-kun, Shin-kun… uwahhh—!!

Monologue

How many days have passed since that happened? I don’t know anymore— My sense of time has completely gone crazy by now.

No, it’s not only that. Just about everything has started to get crazy.

I only remember Shin-kun and I being thrown into the dungeon of Carla-san’s mansion. Just to notice that Kino-kun has been caught first.

Place: Violet mansion — Dungeon

Kino: ...Shit, the chain digs in my neck.

Shin: The chains… are scratching… and painful… 

Yui: (They both have been tied together by chains—, there’s no freedom for them here…)

(Even if I desperately want to go to Shin-kun, I can’t move and only lie on the floor instead)

(And the only person who always comes here—)

*footsteps come closer*

Carla: You all are as unsightly as ever.

Yui: Carla… san…

Shin: ...Bro… ther…

Carla: I have finally destroyed all the other households.

Yui: Ngh… !

Shin: ...Nn!

Kino: …..

Carla: The moment of me becoming the supreme leader is getting closer.

Yui: (Did he… really kill everyone? That can’t be—!)

Carla: Now, Eve. Hand me your blood, so I can finally become the supreme leader today.

Yui: Ah… !

Carla: Get up.

Yui: (Carla-san forcefully dragged me back on my feet. This is also an usual matter—)

Carla: So you cannot even stand by yourself anymore? You are a weak creature indeed.

*Carla gets closer*

Carla: ...But it will not stop me from taking your blood.

Haa, Nn…

Yui: Ah…

Carla: ...Nn… Nn… Ah…

Yui: (...I’m losing my strength already…)

Carla: Haa… what incredible blood… every time I consume it… I gain power.

Yui: (Even though Carla-san has been sucking so much of my blood… it doesn’t seem as if there are any memory coming back to him)

Carla: —Haa, that shall be it for today.

Yui: Ngh…

*Carla leaves*

Yui: (—And he left)

(But he’ll surely come back to suck more blood again. He always came here just for that anyway…)

(I don’t even dare to look back at Shin-kun. Nor can I even reach him because of Carla-san)

Shin: Shit… this cell is completely filled with the scent of your sweet blood now… ngh.

Kino: Yeah… it really does… everytime this happens, the smell gets so intense.

Yui: (Is the smell of my blood really too much for them… ? Ough… I can’t think straight…)

Shin: Geez, haa… I can’t stand it any longer… Yui, let me suck your blood...

Yui: (I think he tolerated this smell for such a long time now, right? Alright, I’d do anything if it’s for Shin-kun…)

Sure, wait… ! I’ll slowly come over… 

*slowly crawls over*

Yui: Shin… kun… ! I’m… here… !

Shin: Ngh… Haa…

Yui: (Shin-kun, his consciousness already feels like a membrane for most parts now. He didn’t notice how I approached him)

Shin: Your bloods… scent...

Yui: Shin-kun… ! If my blood would’ve made things easier for you, you could’ve said so sooner already… 

Shin: Kch… Nn… Mm...

Yui: Nn… !

Shin: Nn… Haa… Nn--

Yui: (—He keeps on sucking my blood…)

Kino: Say… can I… have… some too? My throat hurts because it’s so unbearably thirsty.

*Kino approaches*

Yui: Eh, Ah—!

Yui: (He pulled himself towards me… but I can’t bring myself to resist… him)

Kino: Haa… Nn… Mm… Ah… my throat is… moist again...

Yui: (My head feels so empty all of the sudden… I can’t feel any strength in my body either…)

Shin: Don’t let someone else start drinking. What I got from you isn’t nearly enough for me.

Yui: Nn…

Shin: Nn… Ah… Nn—

Kino: Haa… Nn… Mn… 

Yui: (I’m so lost by now… I think they’re still sucking my blood as I am… but how long will they continue to do so… ?)

(Will I really not leave this place anymore… ?)

Shin: Nn… Haa, Mn—

Kino: Nn… Mn…

Yui: (Ah, now… I can’t think anymore—)

[retrosimp]

Greg Tolan HC's 🌷🐻

Pre-Relationship Greg:

- he is a pretty loyal guy, in good or bad sense like he will not leave ur ass alone to make you feel awful if he doesn't like you but he will also always be around if he's your friend

- Slamming you into lockers or rather pinning you against them is his favourite move

- The classic shower curtain pull-aside when he get's to sneak in on you in P.E

- He will probably first annoy you and scare you and then make your life hell upon realising that he has feelings for you in hope that you get the hint (you don't)

- Sitting next to him is hell.

Like he is everywhere, his long legs and arms always brushing yours (he'll snap at you but do it again//)

- HE SMELLS SOOOOO NICE, comforting soft but manly and I feel somewhat like rain or mint or something “cold” laced with something so comfortable like a fluffy bed our something

- Keeps stealing your stuff

- If you notice him actually being good in school like maths for example he will absolutely deny that and say sb else wrote it for him.

- He is no nerd. At least that is until you say you find intelligence sexy. He'll be a little smug on the inside then.

- he is probably that older brothers best friend that pushed you into the pool as a child and always pulled your braids

Relationship Greg:

- Your his lil tulip 🌷✨

- “The sentence „Omg Greg, you can't just push the kid into the rose bush” would fall way to often

- He looks at you crossing his arms pouting “He was staring at you”

- To most other people he looks scary when he is upset but u actually find it quite cute

- Hugs from behind, head on your shoulder, gentle kisses

- At the same time possessive bitch, so his hands are constantly on you his favourite parts being your thigh, your hips, your ass 🥴

- HE LIVES FOR MASSAGES “ough I got a very bad cramp right here” “Greg. Those are your parts. ” “Exactly why only YOU can make it better” 🥴🔞🤸🏼‍♂️

But fr his favourite spot is probably lower back. If he could he would purr.

- Oh btw, you can't get a pet because it would distract you from him

- He still is a tease and likes getting you worked up 🥴

- If you cry his heart literally hurts as bad as if he'd “got kicked in the balls”

- He loves boasting with and to you at the same time by using u as workout material

“Come here babe I need to demonstrate something ”

- He would take it personally if u refused to sit on him while he is doing push-ups

- He loves to carry you around on his shoulders so he has you near AND can demonstrate his strength to you

- I feel Greg is pretty smart too and we all know that he is confident but he has a hard time expressing feelings

- Needy for your attention. If you tell him how handsome he is or how proud you are or what he did good he's in a great mood

- he would have his own little puns besides lil tulip

- Spontaneous activities and gifts will occur

I feel like Greg actually enjoys life pretty much and would share that with you.

(He'll drag you out of bed if you want to or not, in the end it's always (nearly, let's forget Monstertruck Rallye) worth it)

- Greg is actually quite funny

- He has a soft side with the insecurity to be forgotten

- like you srsly need to comfort him because he has no great idea on how to deal with negative feelings healthily

- He is afraid of openly relying on people and showing “weakness” so he mostly converts sadness, anxiety or stress into conflict and anger

- you help along there a little so after a while into your relationship Greg actually calms down pretty much.

- He realises to gain attention not only by bullying but through his talents and interests. He opens his mind just a little.

- He still loves getting into fights and he will punch anyone laying hands on his girl.

He will probably keep the part quiet where he tried to drown that one guy from college until you are married and you can't run anymore (hahah)

-He is also quite involved in your interests, he wants you to try new stuff together if it's "no NeRD sHiT" and NO besides his Playboy copies he doesn't have a couple of Marvel Comics in his bathroom. Like he would never —

- This guy never tires. He is always out doing something. Wether it's spontaneous adventures, hard workouts or banging you for hours he is up for it all

- Speaking of banging, our lil tulip is HÖRNEYYY and down for you. He's gonna Dom you tho.

- The first time you did it he probably broke the bed's headboard. He might have even bruised your ribs because of his strength

- Gives great cuddles afterwords though.

In general I'd say one of his favourite moves is pulling you in a massive bear hug 🐻🧡

- Sleepy Greg will not let you get up without him. Like idk what this guy eats but if his arm is around you, there is no getting up. Once you wiggle free a little he pulls you back into the covers

- You'd probably lick his face, squish his nose, poke him or something to provoke him into getting up

- He will competitively cushion-fight you

- You actually have more say in your relationship than you thought you would. Like if your ass is mad and you ignore him he will do everything he can to make up.

- Locker slamming Part 2 — this time in frustration

- If you were politically involved that would actually be quite fun for him because he would tag along on demos to punch people

- You will probably sometimes have to fix him up after fights and he will probably take a hit just so you do, 'cause he likes having your soft hands on his cheeks

- Like he is your personal bodyguard + trainer 🤸🏼‍♂️🔞 (remember the jerk off thing, yeah...)

- picks you up, drops you off. Makes sure to occasionally be annoyed with it but insists on doing it still.

- His blue eyes sparkling ✨ when you enter the room

- He would be off his rocker seeing you in an elegant tight-fit prom dress 👗

- I feel like he is a Grandma child. That would be the first person you'd meet from his family

[lastoneout]

I have eaten perfectly ripe and overripe and the more ripe they are the worse they taste. Literally it's just this:

(My fiancé insisted on being included as a control.)

However! Once they are made into banana bread they taste good again! Only once they're mixed in tho like I legit have to have my fiancé come peel the brown bananas for me when I bake it bcs the smell of them makes me gag so hard I can't actually do anything. Hell when they're that brown I can barely even be in the same room as them without feeling like I'm going to hurl. I've even had to take the trash out after someone's thrown away a banana peel just to get the smell out of my house.

But yeah idk. They have this like, fermented sugar flavor that just grows and grows the longer they're ripe for and the stronger it is the harder it is for me to tolerate eating the banana so I prefer them RIGHT before the ripeness really kicks in. When I'm safe. After that they're a complete write-off until they're soggy enough to bake with. I don't even have an issue with the smell or taste once it's in the batter but before then ough it's horrid. My mom's the same way tho so maybe it's a genetic thing??

Edit: TEXTURE!! They also have a bad texture when they're ripe idk it's smoft and bad eugh.

[faerune]

W I X O N for Tess and her dummy 😌

thank you queen have some clownery 😌

W = Wild Card

I have not stopped thinking about Tess on a whim picking up lingerie when she’s out on a run for like days now. She spends the whole ride back home thinking about how frivolous and also weirdly a little hesitant to try smth? But she puts on her big girl panties (haha literally) and Daryl goes...nuts. The idea of her picking that out to wear for him and only him getting to see it and undress her makes the caveman part of his brain go OUGH.

I = Intimacy 

They’re two people that with sex there’s always some kind of intimacy. Especially Daryl since he’s such a physical person when he’s comfortable with someone and Tess makes him feel so incredibly safe (and vice versa). They’re two people who love super strongly and haven’t really had...anywhere to put it or anywhere to express it healthily for a long time. Just the act of like...being that vulnerable with each other intensifies the emotions every time they have sex by ten fold. Even if they’re soft and giggly and it isn’t serious, there’s always an undertone of like...you’re the only person who gets to see me like this and I love you so much. They deserve to be a little sappy and cheesy okay! Also, yes they make love sometimes according to Tess when she needs that emotion and closeness. Which usually makes Daryl cringe at any other time but when Tess is looking at him with those pretty brown eyes and tugging him to their bedroom he makes an exception because she’s kinda right.

X = X-Ray 

UHH...for Tess (ph*t p**** queen) she’s usually Au Naturale which Daryl loves which is ironic because all of his experiences with sex were very influenced by porn and his stupid brother and all of these super toxic attitudes about what sex is. But most of said experiences were...awful and impersonal and made him feel like shit so he likes how just...real and emotional and beautiful she looks just Being Her without any stupid, awkward perfomativeness (pretty sure this is not a word but <3 you get me) to it like people he’s been with before. It makes her smell nice keeping it unshaved sooooo...

As for Daryl, he’s also...not a manscaper LMAO far from it...Tess doesn’t mind though. Uh...as for what he’s packing I don’t...look at him and think oh my god I know his dick is big I know it is (contrary to what every other person who writes him thinks). I just think he’s pretty thick but a little below average with a nice curve which makes Tess very happy.

O = Oral 

Daryl prefers giving more than receiving. He loves giving oral...so much and he’s damn good at it too because he’s not like...fussy about it and eats Tess out like she’s his last meal. Super messy too. There have been quite a few times where he’s finished himself off with his hand or rubbing himself against the bed while he eats her out.

 He’s got weird qualms about receiving due to past traumas and not wanting...Tess to feel like she has to do it? She’s very insistent that she very much wants to but never pushes it obviously. 

Tess has never really been with someone who enjoys giving that much (lmao both emotionally and in bed) so they kind of war a little bit on like...who takes care of who in a weird way? She eventually chills the fuck out and enjoys the ride though because Daryl so clearly enjoys it.

N = NO

They are...not kinky people and there are a lot of boundaries that they don’t mess with. Daryl has past sexual trauma and it takes awhile for him to even admit that to Tess? But she’s good at reading people and thankfully when Daryl like...gets even a little uncomfortable she stops and checks in. She really is like...his first long term relationship that has had a healthy sex life like that and it lets him open up a lot more. Tess has some trauma from being captures ~S4. Not sexual trauma but just...she doesn’t like being tied up/feeling like she’s trapped etc. 

Basically - no degradation (Daryl would lean into it too much and would let it feed into his bad self-worth and bad feelings towards sex), no hitting (even spanking, Tess wouldn’t mind it once in awhile but Daryl feels weird about it), no getting tied up (either of them) and no like...super weird stuff.