#not me ofc I'm married to the moon so

[suguru-getos]

soft yandere satoru hcs:

a/n: hey, you guys should know i ship myself with him so there's no way i'd tolerate insane yandere satoru without ki!ling myself :P soooo- here's me making him a soft yan ^^

warnings: yandere behavior, mentions of arranged marriage troupe, stalkingtroupe, angry!sato ofc but he is still normal about it. mentions of fluff because it's satoru duh <33 also, this is one of the softest yandere hcs i've ever written *giggles*

yandere!satoru who saw you the first time in a jujutsu clan party hosted by your parents and how insignificant you truly were. to yourself, you had the best parents ever, they didn't push you into becoming a sorcerer, but to the kamo, zenin, and gojo clan members it was pure bullshit. wastage of proper sorcerer blood.

until yandere satoru met you for the first time and you hung out, the way he conversed was so different from someone who should be the strongest, someone who wields the highest powers in the whole world. someone who's birth shook the shackles of this world alone. he was kind, he sat next to you, non-judgemental even so he was weirdly wearing that damned blindfold.

he talked to you about your life, and about his own. pointing out the subtle and the not so subtle differences between the both of you. asking if you had a boyfriend. it was so subtle how could you think he had any other intention but to be your friend? naive and stupid.

things escalated real quickly when your mother told you that you were supposed to marry satoru gojo, oh my god- the clan head of the gojo clan, the ever so spoiled, esteemed entitled brat. you really couldn't say anything about this, but to hold your guns you decided to contact him. "you knew that this was happening?" you mumbled, watching him stir the coffee in front of you lazily. "of course, gosh you are so lucky little one!" he snickered, though the way he looks at you, it's hard to process what he's truly feeling inside. you are unaware of his stalking, how he knows your colleagues, how they are what they do, what they eat, how they breathe, to whom you are closer to, who likes you- what time do you get up, eat, what snack do you like, ghana roasted coffees over normal ones. though he would not admit to it.

there are a few times he has watched you sleep like a creep, just sitting next to you, just feeling the innate feeling of sharing the same bed as you. how cute you are, he often mumbles to himself. "i could crush you without even trying" as a musing criteria for how naive you are, how cute you are and how absolutely adorable you are. creepy-

to pretend that he is more than willing to let you take things your own way, he lets you plan dates. cute, adorable dates. one of the days you would be doing pottery with him, the other time it's an aquarium date where satoru doesn't know why you're so mesmerised when the real awe is you, the other time it was a planeterium and that's when satoru shows you his abilities for the first time, holding you closer to him like the princess you are and walking on sky, as if it's nothing, amid the full moon night. the other time it's you and him making tiaras in a garden, sometimes he would just randomly pull you closer, kissing your cheek while languishing in a movie together. so cute, so astonishingly cute! maybe marrying him is not a bad idea???

things show you their true form when you were on a date in a high-end restaurant, roof-top and fully booked. he's always been so cute with you, you had opened up and been comfortable enough. until a waiter decided to hit on you, before long- you found him choking on his own blood, despicable sight of him oozing out blood from his eyes, coughing and dying in front of you. "wh- what was that?" when you glance at satoru, he is emphasising the same lazy grin, smirking. "what. go on? smile back!" he muses, and when you're a teary-eyed mess, he presents himself with a carefully painted visage of guilt. "oh no no- baby i'm so sorry- i lost it, you make me lose it! i love you so much please no!"

would not let you have personal space after, forcing your parents to hasten the whole marriage thingy, he thinks you would leave him and that has him acting out of character. though he now knows fear is a powerful tool, even though he does not want to use it on his darling. sometimes he can't help it, especially when you act so fucking adamant and so fucking stubborn!!

"listen, princess, here's what's going to happen. daddy's going to be really cooperative if you come here and give him a hug, daddy does not want to be a meanie to his little girl. you know that right?" by being a 'meanie' he just means getting angry, manhandling you against the wall, seething in rage and bubbling hot with the insecurity of your behavior being the slightest of different.

the thing is satoru really, really loves you. the prospect of being a yandere is more 'dere' in him. however when the yandere shows? that's when you should truly fear the capabilities of this man. satoru hates this but he can sometimes use your triggers against you. don't like being tied up, maybe an empty threat would get you in line, after all, you refuse to listen when he wants to love you!

he's going to make sure your engagement ring has a location curse imbued into it, he wants to know 24x7 where his baby is. one time you lied to him that you are at work when you were actually in a colleague's party, you were greeted by the whole party avenue being destroyed to shreds, people bruised and only you knew it was your now husband, because he texted. 'infinity protects you princess, not others. next time think twice about lying to daddy.'

his behavior can get hot and cold instantly, one moment he is the most adorable man-child, loving you, playing with you... until he's ticked off and the real, no-nonsense monster comes out to meet you. a scathing frown with glowy eyes as he reminds you that you belong to the 'strongest'.

there are times he does use sex as a weapon, a weapon to make you give in. he is just so good at it, he is going to spoil you senseless, kissing every square inch of your body, worshipping you, crying with you when he mumbles apologies for being angry and mean at you, for scaring you, you don't deserve it, such a pretty baby, oh you take him so well. he was made for you, you are the strongest because you have him wrapped around your pinkie... only to show you the rage and insecurity and all of it when you come home late.

the only positivity you have, is he would rather kill himself than hurt you. that brings you peace, that brings a sense of stability and sensibility into you to hang onto the rope of your relationship a bit longer, clutching onto the fleeting hope of him changing...

[vivwritesfics]

CAN WE PLEASE GET A MOON PROPOSAL OR RING BEARER?! 🦝 ~nurse-sainz

Ofc pookie (I turned it into hcs though I'm sorry

(Tagging you so you get the notif that I finally answered lmao @nurse-sainz )

One of the first things they had taught moon was how to hold things

Well they kind of had to

He learnt what his lil fingers could do and ran with it

Like literally picked stuff up and ran with it

And then tried to eat it (most of it was inedible)

So, they taught him to hold stuff

Which was how Logan found himself in this situation

Moon loved his dad

Nightly snuggles with his parents and all that

But he didn't listen to logan

No matter what trick logan tried to get moon to do, he'd only do it if his mum was asking

Logan held the ring out to moon

"You gotta promise me, buddy," he said as moon wrapped his little raccoon hands around the ring

And then he tried to put it in his mouth

"Moon, no!" Logan tried, taking it off of him and trying again

It took several tries

On the final try (final because Moon didn't try to eat it), Logan called his girl in

He kept Moon behind him, the ring hidden from view (not hidden from view, he was too fat for that)

"Baby," Logan said to her, "I've got a real important question"

He stepped to the side

Immediately she was on her knees, clicking her tongue

On all fours, Moon went running towards his mum

Without the ring

"Hello my little man," he said and picked him up

It took Logan a minute to realise Moon was no longer holding the ring

"Fuck, no, no, no!" Logan cried as he turned to look for the ring

On all fours

Searching for it

But it wasn't on the floor, was it

No, it was in Moons stomach

Standing up, Logan looked at that little demon

"Baby, don't hate me," he began

She furrowed her brows

"We need to go to the vet"

She questioned it in the car with Moon on her lap

With a red blush logan explained

And called moon a demon

Which he was forced to take back

"What do you say?" He asked in the waiting room of the vets office

She was still glaring at her boyfriend

How could he let their sweet precious baby eat a ring?

Sweet little moon (who the receptionist loved)

"Logie, honey, you let our Baby eat something inedible and I'm really mad right now, but yes, I'll marry you"

[ahqkas]

Hello hello! I just discovered your blog and I adore how you capture the batboys (Jason is my favorite >//<) air and vibe so well. It is like you're in the room with them! I'd like to request a little fic or blurb about reader and Jason being besties and both of them are comfortable with one another so they are touchy with each other. In a non-sexual way. Like, hugs and holding hands or leaning on one another. I'm a very touchy, but only with people I'm very fond of and I think Jason would be the same way. I think i'd be so cute if they do it without even realizing it. It is like they are magnets. Reader will walk in the room and migrate over to him and loop their arms and lean her head on his shoulder. Or vice versa. They would be standing in line at a shop or they are cooking dinner together and Jason just drops his head on her shoulder, hunching over to feel her warmth. They love to drape themselves over each other to recharge or simply be close. Even linking pinkies makes them happy. Maybe they don't notice they are in the same room, but still find themselves brushing shoulders before smiling once they notice who it is. I think Jason would make you feel so safe and comfortable too. He is so much bigger than you that you just want to hide in his presence. Like a giant teddy bear. (I'm shy too. So he is like the perfect shield to unexpected social interactions.) I got off topic! No matter where they are, walking down the street, sitting on the couch, going to a bookstore, eating dinner, they always find a way to touch one another. Maybe even light kisses on the cheek in greeting/goodbyes. They just can't help it! It is so bad (but good though ofc) that people assume they are married. His family loves to tease him about it, if they even know about her. Anyway, that is my idea! Love your work! <3

JASON AND YOU DIDN’T THINK ABOUT IT MUCH—how easily you gravitated toward each other, how natural it felt. It wasn’t something you planned or discussed; it just happened, like the way a flame seeks oxygen or tides chase the moon. It was a rhythm you fell into without even realizing it.

Like tonight. You’d just walked into his apartment after a long day, shrugging your jacket off as you searched for him. You didn’t need to call out or knock; Jason always left the door unlocked for you, a silent reassurance that you were welcome anytime. You spotted him in the kitchen, sleeves rolled up, chopping vegetables with the kind of precision that made you wonder if he’d learned it from Alfred or while cleaning weapons. He glanced up, a slow smile spreading across his face as you drifted over to him.

Before you knew it, your arm had looped around his, head resting against his broad shoulder. His warmth radiated through the thin fabric of his shirt, and the steady rhythm of his breathing grounded you in a way no amount of solitude ever could. “Long day?” he asked, voice low and rough, like he was talking more to the air around you two than directly to you.

“Mhm,” you hummed, closing your eyes for a second. “You’re too tall for this to be comfortable, you know.”

Jason huffed out a soft laugh, setting the knife down and turning slightly so he could press his chin to the top of your head. “And you’re too stubborn to just sit down and let me cook. So, here we are.”

It was always like this. Subtle touches that felt as natural as breathing. Standing in line for coffee, Jason’s hand would find yours, linking your pinkies just because. Or you’d be out walking, and you’d lean into his side, not realizing you had done it until you noticed how his shoulder dipped to accommodate your height. Even when you weren’t actively seeking each other out, there was this unspoken pull. A brush of shoulders, a casual hand on the small of your back when he guided you through a crowded room, the way he’d rest his arm across the back of the couch when you watched movies, his fingers absently playing with your hair.

People noticed, of course. The teasing from his family was relentless whenever they caught wind of it. “So, when’s the wedding?” Dick would quip, smirking as Jason scowled but didn’t deny anything. Even Alfred had raised a knowing eyebrow the one time you’d stopped by Wayne Manor, Jason’s hand firmly on your lower back as he led you into the room.

Jason never seemed bothered by it, though. If anything, he seemed more protective afterward, like he was daring anyone to say something more. And you couldn’t blame them for assuming. The way Jason looked at you when he thought you weren’t paying attention—like you were the only safe harbor in a world full of storms—would’ve convinced anyone.

But for the two of you, it wasn’t about labels or explanations. It was about the quiet comfort you found in each other. The way Jason could hunch over and rest his head on your shoulder after a long day, letting you feel his weight and warmth as though he trusted you to hold him steady. Or how you could slip into his space, no matter how crowded or chaotic, and know that his presence was enough to make you feel safe.

You were magnets, constantly drawn together. And in a world that often felt too loud and too harsh, Jason was your soft place to land. Your best friend who made the world seem a little less intimidating, one touch at a time.

ADDITIONAL NOTE! hi lovely !! i’m sorry if this is too short but thank u sm for the request <3

[ryotono]

Hashiras/Pillars and [Y/N] and quotes and mucho rizz hihi (sorry)

Feat. Kamaboko squad!

Enjoy!

When Tanjiro attacks sanemi:

[Y/N]: GET HIM BOY, F*CKING KICK HIS ASS AYOOO

Giyuu: so it's you the bad influence

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

In the Battle against Upper moon one:

[Y/N] looking at Kokushibo: so, he is your like great-great-grandfather?

Muichiro: yes

[Y/N]: oh...

[Y/N]: is he single?

Muichiro: wtf

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Tanjiro: what's your breathing style? you're a hashira, so must be something really cool!

[Y/N]: I can tell you only if you promise it's a secret between us

Tanjiro: oh ofc!

[Y/N] get closer: it's rizz

Tanjiro: what

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Zenitsu: what do you mean "Rizz" that's not even a breathing style-

[Y/N] pointing to the other pillars: do you see all that people?

Zenitsu: yes?

[Y/N]: all of them are my bitches, except for muichiro, muichiro is my baby

[Y/N]: so don't do "tHaT's NoT eVeN a BrEaThInG sTyLE" to me boy, because my rizz is upper than you ever gonna be, understood?

Zenitsu, crying: y-yes sir

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Hashira meeting:

Giyuu: y'all joking, [Y/N] doesn't have a crush in me

Gyomei: yes they do

Uzui: sadly they do

Sanemi: they fucking do you blind ass f*cker ("no offense gyomei" "it's okay")

Mitsuri: they do!!! ^^

Muichiro: that cloud looks like a duck, ha

Shinobu: they do tomioka san

Rengoku: NO JOKES, THEY DO PARTNER!

Obanai: they do, and it's disgusting

[Y/N]: yes I do, very much actually

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

[Y/N]: okay but what about your great-great-uncle?

Muichiro: leave me alone

[Y/N]: answer the question muichiro, ANSWER

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Inosuke: HEY YOU, THE HASHIRA

[Y/N]: hm, me?

Inosuke: YES, FIGHT ME!

[Y/N]: HOLY SH*T PEPPA PIG??

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

[Y/N]: I don't understand, how could i have food poisoning?

Shinobu: did you eat something strange?

[Y/N]: no! I just made me some food

Shinobu: that explains a lot

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

[Y/N]: so you telling that we have to beat Michael Jackson?

Ubuyashiki: yes- wait, who-

[Y/N]: what if "HEE HEE" us? I'm scared, rengoku hold me

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

[Y/N]: I’ve only had Kamaboko Squad for a day and a half

[Y/N]: but if anything happened to them I’d kill everyone in this room and then myself.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Sanemi: WHAT DID YOU SAY?

[Y/N]: i said that if you keep screaming and threatening your beautiful little brother, I'm gonna get your sword and f*cking shove in your ass, got it :)?

Sanemi: alright

let's try again

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Sanemi: WHAT DID YOU SAY?

[Y/N]: I hate you, but at the same time I want to kiss you so bad, and give you all the love and support you deserve babe

Sanemi: ???

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

[Y/N] in a mission with Mitsuri and Obanai:

Obanai, obviously furious: can't you just go away? There's enough pillars in this mission

[Y/N]: yeah I can go, but I don't want to miss your failure to confess to Mitsuri, start dating, eventually getting married and have kids, living happy, but because your such a weakass, none of this is going to happen

Obanai: ... You don't need to say that y'know

[Y/N]: oh yes I need

just kidding I love obanai

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Gyomei: hello there

[Y/N]: boobs

Gyomei: sorry?

[Y/N] sweating: i-i mean titties- NO I MEAN BIG MEN BOOBS F*CK I MEAN HI HELLO HOW ARE YOU??

Gyomei:

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

X: Master Ubuyashiki, we need to stop the Hashira [Y/N]

Ubuyashiki: why is that

X: They are adopting all the kids here, started with that group with the demon sister, then the younger brothers of the Wind and Flame Pillar and the girls from Butterfly State, even the Mist Pillar are gone

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Akaza: guess it's your end now rengoku

[Y/N]: THE FUCK IT'S NOT YOUR KICKED BASKETBALL SON OF A BI-

TANJIRO: WHERE'D YOU EVEN COME FROM?

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Extra!

Akaza: and suddenly appears this crackhead kinda of demon slayer, and starts barking at me

Kokushibo: like a dog?

Akaza: yes

Demon [Y/N]: heh, I like them

TWO [Y/N]'S????? AND CRACKHEAS??? PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN PEOPLE

That's all for today! Thank you all for reading and interacting with my other posts ;) Love y'all!!!!

(English is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any misspelling or errors)

[myz-wykkyd]

Used my limited graphic design skills to make a chart of all the characters Rosalie has romanced in (almost) every farming sim I've played with her. Lol I'd always wanted to do something like this and I'm pretty happy with the result.

I made a free to use template of it on the right if anyone else wants to show off who they romanced. Feel free to decorate/doo what you like with it- just link back here if you use it so other people can find it o/

Brainrot Below<3

Now, though many of these games involved premade mcs- I've played as some variation of Rosalie in games for as long as I could remember.

I noticed there's a trend that popped up in her choices that I think is as interesting as it is amusing. Ofc, most of these choices were just my personal favorite bachelors of that game, but they were still used to devlop her, and I hadn't realized how much she leaned towards certain professions, personalities, ect. I've concluded my girl loves a hardworking boy whose brooding but sweet- or a golden retriever Marlin: Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life was my first Farming Sim. I didn't get to play the female version until much later in life. So my choice of who'd I/Rosalie married had been pretty decided lonnng before I finally got to play it. But honestly even though I like Marlin, he's kind of the default choice because I didn't care for Rock and Gustafa- and Rosalie wouldn't either. I think if I had ever gotten to play HMDS:Cute I might have liked him more- or she would have married Griffin-

Blue | Harvest Moon: Magical Melody / Friends of Mineral Town: Loved Grey/Blue. (Let's face it their pretty much the same character). Upset the remake took away his hat. Little off topic, but even though character customization wouldn't be a thing in these games for years- I'd used to imagine my character had pink hair like Popuri LOL

Vaughn | Harvest Moon: Sunshine Islands: Vaughn was the first time I ever was head over heels for a character in one of these games- I just adored everything about him and I don't think it's hard to see why. Once she got to know him better, Rosalie def would have been hella smitten for this cowboy- (Also Vaughn walked so Logan could run-)

Owen | Harvest Moon Animal Parade: So Owen is an unexpected deviation. Most of these choices are also my favorites, but when I first played through HM:AP Gil was actually my favorite bachelor. I could have made him and Rosalie work, but it just didn't feel right. So after looking them all over I think she def would have preferred Owen

Dylas | Rune Factory 4: One of my favorite games from the genre- and I think the cast of romanceable characters was STACKED. Dylas was my favorite because he was seriously SO damned cute in all his events 🥰 Also think it's kinda funny he's a horse guy and Rosalie has a lot of horse motifs herself-

Alex | Stardew Valley: REALLY unpopular opinion incoming! I've put over 500+ hrs into SV 😭 but in all that time, I've just never clicked with any of the characters. Which really sucks because this is the first game I ever got to play as Rosalie. Alex and Sam were my favs, but I think Rosalie would lean more towards Alex.

Logan | My Time At Sandrock: Logan 😍💖🥰Just, guh- I LOVE everything about him and MTAS so damn much. Especially because the hyper fixation I had with this game/character was what led me to finalize Rosalie's design/character at long last. I developed so much content for him and Rosalie I never got to share 😭hope I can someday!

Mark | Coral Island: God I love big men who love animals- and Rosalie does too. 💦🥰 Honestly, even though he started out as one of my favorites (later to be replaced by Shark man hoo hoo haw), I wished more of his heart events focused on his relationship with the player instead of the dog. It was really cute at first but like 6 of the 8 cutscenes were about it and most of the time he never even interacted with your character. Was disappointing ngl.

Nokk | Roots of Pacha: Now- Nokk is not currently a romanceable character, but I'm hoping the future update will add him to the roster. 🫠💔Cause this is another case where I LOVE the game to pieces but none of the characters speak to me- aside from the one I can't have- Hayden: Fields of Mistria: and last but not least- Hayden. He just completely encapsulates so much of what Rosalie finds attractive, it's a little funny. I'm waiting until the game is finished to continue playing and I can't wait to see what the future holds for him.

The following will include some honorable mentions that I didn't include because I didn't have anymore room on my template/they weren't a farming sim/ect.

First up! Nathaniel from Sunhaven!<3 Feel like this responsible captain of the guard would work well with Rosalie. Honestly, there weren't really any choices that felt right for her, but for once in many years my main playthrough of the game ended up being with a different character and I had someone pre-picked out for her. So there lots of great choices, just none that suit Rosalie well.

[vivgst]

COD Headcanons

I mean they're not hc it's just shit I think they say/do but I needed the title okay?

As I previously said this is just my silly little opinion, I would love to read yours but don't take this too personal and I'm saying this cause Imma bout to write SHIT about two characters and I'm scared cause they're loved by the whole fandom.

Okay thats all thanks<3333

Let's start with my favorite piece of shit, shall we?

Alejandro Vargas

I don't care what yall say this man is a CHEATER and he would make you feel guilty about it too because you're not "meeting his needs".

“I’m not sexist???? We cannot do the same things, it's basic biology!”

Maybe he's good in bed, let's give him that.

Alain meza said he loved Rudy so let's assume he's bi, uh... he wouldn't admit that shit, not in a million years, probably would get offended if you even dare to suggest it.

He doesn’t argue to fix things, he argues to repeat how much in the right he is, I feel like he NEVER admits he’s in the wrong, he seems very stubborn.

Now can we address that fucking temper of his? Breathe mf, no ones gonna die if you stop yelling for a second.

I feel like he must’ve had A LOT of trouble when he just joined the army because of his anger issues, think about it for a moment: someone with a higher rank yelling at him and you think he just took it? I doubt it.

MUST HAVE fought with Valeria more than once cause that temper of hers is just as shitty.

I promise I don’t hate him, well I do but he’s one of my favs, I don’t know how to explain this bye.

Simon Riley

He’s very chill I love him <3

I think of him like a very nostalgic man, he thinks a lot about his past, past lovers, past experiences, when he was new in the army, you know? Not in a “I’m still traumatized” way, he’s just nostalgic.

He’s absent minded, he’s always daydreaming (when he’s not doing something important ofc).

Thin and I don’t fucking care, THAT MAN IS THIN, you can even see it sometimes!!!! He’s got chicken legs, I love them.

He really seems to enjoy dad jokes.

He cares a lot about his teammates and I love it, it’s very cute.

Can we talk about how everyone put him as a fucking beast in bed? I don't see it, I think he's ruthless when he needs to but I don't think this applies when it comes to sex, he suffered a lot too and sadly I know too well that sex is pretty fucking terrible after rape, especially because you feel like you're gonna hurt the person you're having sex with so...

John MacTavish

Typa guy everyone loves, even your dad and your grandma's always saying how handsome he is.

Maybe he was bullied bc of his accent but he just told them to go fuck themselves.

Caring and loving, buys his partner flowers and their favorite candy/chocolates/desserts.

Remembers anniversaries, birthdays, medical or school appointments.

Too charismatic and funny.

Kyle Garrick

He’s too good for his own good… I feel like he always end up going out with INSANE people, the jealous type, they’re always bitching and making him angry and stressed but he forgives them cause he’s an angel.

Very sweet, loves cooking for people he loves.

Kinda family oriented.

He smells good, I can almost smell his perfumeeeeee he smells good, he spends MONEY on it too.

Even the devil is afraid of him when he’s mad.

I think he's very private about his life in general, doesn't like to vent his problems.

Hot lover.

John Price

Now this man is a FATHER, my fucking dad I swear.

He seems pretty conservative to me, not in a bad way like he wants you to be his personal maid and slave, more like he wants to date to marry, hates casual sex.

Loves whiskey.

Dad energy, he would be so caring and loving with his child, he would give that baby the moon.

I don’t think he would love to date a younger woman, not a woman in her twenties at least, I think he would be into women his age.

If you feel disappointment by that, maybe you could try fixing your relationship with your dad, sweetheart ;).

Hates confrontation and loves to work things out.

Let’s not talk about how sex with be with the old man, okay? Thanks.

He's not that old, I get that but he looks like he's fucking 68.

Phillip Graves

He looks kinda daddy in that pic, not gonna lie.

“How come you don’t want to have sex? What about me? Have you thought about how that makes me feel? If your head hurts, sex would help but you never consider me, I’ll sleep in the couch”.

A selfish, self-centered bitch, only thinks about himself.

Feeling good having sex with him? Aw baby, try again cause this mf would use you like a damn toy and he couldn’t care less about your feelings or how much pain you’re in.

Cheater, he wouldn’t even be quiet about it. “Oh you want to divorce me? And where are you gonna go, sugar? You’re nothing without me”.

Doesn’t fucking know where the clit is, he doesn’t have a fucking clue.

Of course straight, loves to be white and American.

“Of course I can say whatever I want, I’m from America I have freedom of speech”.

Fuck you graves.

Rodolfo Parra

Perfect.

He seems so sweet and kind and considerate I love him.

Smart as hell, probably got the best grades when he was a kid.

Doesn’t hate anyone, no one hates him.

Loves nature and animals but he can’t enjoy it too much cause he is always busy.

Dreams about having a big family and a dog (a golden, probably).

Forget about having rough sex UNLESS he’s mad (fr mad like losing his shit but that doesn’t happen frequently).

Could be a teacher if he wasn’t in the army, he’s very patient and can explain things easily.

Have a pretty smile.

Valeria Garza aka MAMI

Feels like she needs to prove something, she was underestimated for so long in the army that now she’s always trying to prove to herself how badass and good at her job she is.

Almost no one knows the real Valeria, her favorite things, music taste, if she prefers cold or hot, coffee or tea etc.

She hates cold weather with all her MIGHT.

Likes to smoke only when she’s stressed.

Likes animals but thinks they’re so much work and she doesn’t have the time.

Did drugs once and hated it.

Feels guilty when she spots a church but she WOULD NEVER admit this shit to anyone.

Used to the worst of life so she didn’t like when someone is kind with her, is like “tf am I supposed to do with it???” but she gets used to it eventually.

I don’t think she has anger issues but def she doesn’t fucking know how to regulate her emotions, she lets stress take over her.

She would love a narcowife, kind of woman who wears a lot of beachy dresses and have a shitty personality like her (like Kate del Castillo in La Reina del Sur or in Bad Boys, exactly that kind of narcowife) (I’m kinda projecting, sorry lol).

I can’t picture her with a sweet girl and I think a sweet girl wouldn’t be able to handle that woman.

She keeps arguing even though she realized she’s in the wrong.

She wouldn't be able to spend a lot of time with her S.O, she's such a workaholic.

I don't think she likes to wear men clothes.

I don't think she hates kids but I can't picture her with kids.

Wouldn't divorce once she's married.

Btw I didn’t want to make this too sexual bc lately this fandom is full of just that, too much smut, too much violence and rape in the smut and it’s so graphic that I feel I’m watching instead of reading wtf, its uncomfortable and I honestly can’t picture the characters being that violent and vile.

As I said in my previous hcs… these guys are surrounded by violence, stress and blood every day, I personally don’t think they wanna get home to torture their partners (well, maybe graves cause he is a piece of shit that mf. Okay kidding, not even Graves is that much of a bastard).

[quitealotofsodapop]

JTTW-era Stone Egg part 2:

referencing this previous post about the Pilgrims reacting to the knowledge that au!Wukong is having a baby and has a missing mate.

Ao Lie is a real bro; he figured out Wukong was a having a kid based on his dragon/horse nose, and decides to support him 100% no matter his choice at the end of the day. The fact that he suspects its an asexually-produced Stone Egg that could kill his new buddy is something Ao Lie is keeping quiet about until Wukong himself is comfortable sharing it.

Ao Lie, after Bajie accuses him of having a crush on Wukong: "Ew no! He most certainly has a mate awaiting his return - I wouldn't dare dishonor a married demon!" Wukong, brightly playing along: "Yeah, piglet! Plus, no one will ever measure up to my Mihou!" Ao Lie, confused whinny: "Excuse me, what?" Wukong, tail curling into a heart: "The strongest, most clever monkey on Flower Fruit Mountain - my equal in all including on the battlefield. <3"

The rest of the gang are pleasantly surprised... and outraged to learn that their pregnant companion has a mate that up and left him while he was pregnant. Whomever this "Macaque" figure is, the Pilgrims gonna have a stern talk with him when they find him.

Except maybe the two former-celestials;

Bajie is just like: "Wait, did you just say this Macaque guy was your equal in battle!?" Wukong, wistful sigh: "Yeah..." Zhu Bajie & Sha Wujing: *share equally terrified looks*

Maybe they'll need to devise an attack strategy before confronting this guy head on. Ao Lie loudly states that he's gonna kick the guy if he sees him first.

Tripitaka meanwhile has to mentally wrap his head around the idea of two men marrying before he can process that *Sun Wukong* is married. The Confuscist / Buddhist attitudes at the time said "Girls have Karma Cooties"; so it was considered normal for men to "prefer other men's company" but it was still super-illegal. Being raised in a sheltered, likely all-male, monastery also adds in extra confusion for the monk. Not to mention his own asexuality.

Tripitaka: "Is it... acceptable for a man to love another man like one would a woman?" Zhu Bajie: "Only if they're into it." Tripitaka: "Wha...?"

Eventually he ends up asking the boddhisattvas and different gods for their opinions;

Tripitaka: "Is it normal amongst those in the Celestial Realm for men to... have thoughts of romance for other men?" Erlang: "Oh diyu, yeah! It's totally normal! We even have Tu'er Shen - he's the rabbit god of homosexual love!" Tripitaka, pleasantly surprised: "Oh! That's interesting - but is it accepted?" Erlang & the Plum Hill Lads: *share a footballer's huddle, whispering intensely* Erlang: "Ehhh... just don't bring it up around my uncle. He's kinda weird about it." Triptiaka, a little heartbroken: "Oh..."

Best advice comes from Guanyin herself ofc;

Guanyin: "I'm am composed of multiple energies, Tang Monk. Although I do not experience romantic feelings like say, Chang'e and Hou Yi, I know for a fact that the buddha does not judge those for whom they love - even if their fellow man do so." Tripitaka: *delighted smile!* Tripitaka, remembering why he asked: *fatherly instincts activate* "I'm going to kill that Liu'er Mihou for breaking my student's heart!"

In the Jttw Stone Egged au where Macaque lives, Tripitaka is the only one to get a solid punch in before Wukong calls the gang off.

Angst and canonical death tw under Read More;

Zhu Bajie ultimately starts out as a huge a-hole, and the Journey makes him a little less of a jerk. One huge change Wukong noticed in his bro's behavior was around the time... he lost Macaque.

Especially in the Slow Boiled au.

Bajie would walk up to Wukong like he did many time when he tried stealing his snacks or to poke fun at him... only to sit down next to the monkey watches the moon together. Both longing.

Zhu Bajie: "You know... I wasn't lying when I said I was cursed to suffer many heartbreaks... I know what it looks like from a mile away." Wukong: *says nothing, hiding face in his arms and knees* Zhu Bajie: "You really loved that guy, huh?" Wukong: *nods, face still hidden* Zhu Bajie, confidently: "...you'll see him again. Maybe not in this lifetime, but you will." Wukong, uncharacteristically quiet: "Thanks..." Zhu Bajie: "No problem."

The pig is noticeably easier on Wukong after that day. And maybe a little more appriciative of the time he had with Culian... he's experienced enough bad love-lifes to figure out how to make things work. Maybe after the Journey is over, he'll give her a call?

He does really hope his Eldest Brother and his mate reunite in the future... even if it means in the Diyu.

[vynnytypesstuff]

Umm hello!! I hope you don't mind me requesting this, I saw your dating hcs for Sun and Macaque and I loved them! May I request some marriage hcs?? Like what would include being married to these mistical monkeys?? Please and thank you! ^^

꒰୨୧﹒Lego Monkie Kid - Marriage Hcs for Sun Wukong and Macaque 

I swear I'm not dead it's just been busy lmao

Ofc I don't mind!! Here you go <33

Warnings: None

Sun Wukong

• Dating him was one thing, but marriage? That's a whooole other ballgame. Definitely has its ups and downs and they are very prominent

• Not going to lie, you’re probably the one who proposes. Wukong is immortal, so the thought of proposing has never really crossed his mind (neither has marriage tbh). He doesn’t see the point in getting married since you two already act “married.” If you want to make it official, though, he’ll give in 

• He doesn't stress over taking you on extravagant dates or giving you expensive gifts when you're dating, and it's the same attitude when married. Hell, your wedding only consisted of family and a few close friends and there wasn't much planning involved 

• There’s not much discussion on the topic of moving in together, it kind of just happens on its own? When you were dating you’d always show up at each other’s homes (often unannounced on Wukong’s end) so there’s not really much to talk about since you're both already kind of used to staying in the same place together

• I hope you know how to cook because he sure can't! He travels a lot and ends up snacking on peaches and peach chips so he hasn't tried to learn. The most he can do in regards to "cooking" is brew you a cup of tea. Don't worry about preferences, at this point he'll eat anything as long as it tastes good.

• This man leaves his stuff all around the house. There's probably an extra room somewhere dedicated to some of the stuff he's hoarded over the years. Unless you want to spend days cleaning everything, make sure he picks up after himself

• One word. Commitment. We all know that Wukong can have some trouble when it comes to commitment Don't be surprised by his tendencies to run off on adventures while notifying you at the last second. You're going to need to call him out on his behavior because he most likely isn't aware that he may be hurting you 

• After you both start to get settled in the marriage, there are lots of traveling together, whether it be for business, adventures, or vacation. You've probably seen more little corners of the world now than before you were married

• Watching the sunrise together. I know, cheesy, but honestly, a relationship with Wukong is going to be a little cheesy sometimes. He loves watching the sunrise because it makes him feel at peace and boosts his mood (especially since the view from his home is incredible) and he wants to share that with you

• Personally, I think Wukong wouldn't mind trying to start a family, though he wouldn't be in any rush to do so. Don't get me wrong, he likes the thought of it, but even he's aware of how much knowledge he lacks when it comes to familial relationships

Liu'er Mihou/Macaque

• His anxiety really said [insert upwards trend chart emoji here]. He didn't think he'd ever get married to anyone (not that he isn't over the moon about it). He's both excited and anxious

• Like Wukong, Macaque prefers a smaller wedding with a shorter guest list, though he takes wedding planning a bit more seriously. Part of the reason for this is that he likes things organized. The other part is that he wants your wedding to be as memorable for both of you as possible

• Congrats, you've domesticated Macaque /hj. Seriously though, he finds himself spending more time at home with you. When he leaves the house, it's typically to do something absolutely necessary (ex. when the Lady Bone Demon needs him for something). He sees both home and you as an escape from his troubles

• There's this brief period after you get married when he won't stop doing nice things for you (making/buying you gifts, doing tasks for you, etc.). Of course, it's because he loves you, but it's also because part of him thinks that the marriage is too good to be true and that he needs to prove that he's worthy enough for it

• Splitting chores because he doesn't think it's fair for one person to take all the workload, nor does he see a point in doing so. You'll take on the bigger chores (such as cleaning out the house) together

• Has a huge rush of pride when he sees you wearing the ring on your finger. Sometimes his eyes will linger on it, though he'll immediately avert his gaze if you notice

• You thought he couldn't get any more protective when you started dating, but that was only scratching the surface of it. It's still not too overbearing but it's on thin ice. At this point, you've probably become best friends with the shadow clones he sends to look after you when he's gone

• Speaking of shadows, he teleports around the house a lot. For example, you'll be doing a mundane chore (let's say the dishes) and he'll just jump down from the ceiling out of nowhere

• There's this sort of unspoken rule between the two of you where neither of you can go to bed upset/angry at the other. What I mean by that is if there's an argument, you can't leave it unresolved. It helps encourage communication between you two

• Ngl,,, I think Macaque is a family man at heart. Is it something he's going to admit on his own? That's debatable. He thinks that if he ever has kids he'll end up scaring or hurting them. He'll open up to you about the idea eventually, he just needs time

[angelus-scripturae]

Heyy! Could you do headcannons for the boys with a partner that is a very well known youtuber/streamer? Thank youuuu! <3 (also I'm Dyslexic so sorry for any spelling mistakes!)

Of course! I actually wanted to write something like this soon so thank you for giving me a reason to!

Also i’m dyslexic too i very heavily rely on autocorrect lol :))

ALSO IM SORRY ABOUT MY PROLONGED ABSENCE ONE OF THE PEOPLE HERE WHO HELPED LEFT SO IM TRYNA LEARN TO WRITE SMUT SO I CAN KEEP GOONG WITH IT AND NOW ONE OF MY IRL FRIENDS IS HERE (sorry mate) PLEASE BARE WITH MEZ

The Boys headcannons for an influencer!reader.

Pairings: EddieVR x Reader, juicyfruitsnacks x reader, joshdub x reader, sleepymully x reader, YourNarrator x reader.

Warnings: Bad language, mentions of guns/ robbery, shitty writing.

Eddie

I feel like you would be a paranormal investigation channel in this case

Or a channel that does scary short films/ skits

You upload your clips from streams and videos onto tiktok and other social media

One time when doing a “Worlds scariest tiktoks?” video, someone had sent in one of your videos for him to react to

He found it so scary that he reached out to you.

He asked for you to help him and the boys at some haunted places and you two just began to bond and become close.

One night he invited you out to ‘record’ with him and the boys but when you arrived, he was there with a hand made poster.

Almost like a promposal

At first, you started laughing out of confusion but when you realised it was serious you immediately said yes to dating him.

Fans had notice how close you two had gotten (even more than before) and started theorising.

Eventually, you told them after having a talk about where you wanted the relationship to go

Once everyone knew, the edits and posts talking about the two of you flooded in.

You both loved how sweet everyone was

Of course you both got hate from fans as does every internet-open relationship between two well loved people

However, all that matters is the two of you.

You help each other when the hate gets a bit extreme with love and breaks from socials

Eventually after a few years, Eddie takes you out to ‘record’ once again

However, when you get to the studio you were due to record at, there’s a small table with a candle in the middle

You turn around to ask Eddie what was going on, you saw him on one knee with a small, black, velvet box in hand

It seemed like a cheesy and cliché situation but as he asked you to marry him, you barely let him finish before saying yes.

Let’s just say fans went crazy finding this out

Narrator

You probably know what I’m gonna say

You’re a VR voice actor channel.

like the ones that troll people in vr with different voices

or just a normal va channel but we’re going with VR rn

He was recording with the boys when he started with his deep voice in a sort of fake-flirting situation

You gave it right back ofc

He was startled at first but then you set up a hole storyline and his fans loved it.

At the time, you hadn’t known who he was

but your comments did

they urged to to do more with him and so you reached out

you made more and more content together to the point the fans shipped you to the moon and back

you couldn’t deny your feelings for him any longer

so one day in a call with him you asked him out.

He said yes almost immediately

then backtracked and tried to act “cool” about it

that made you giggle

so you began dating and the fans could tell

Narrator became so much more bashful and touchy around you

especially in person

Although they new for sure when he proposed in a video where you all went to disney land and they loved it

so did you

You started crying

I feel like you were at the wishing well thing and you said something like

“i wish to marry my best friend” or smth as a joke

then you turned around and he was on one knee

The amount of edits with sappy songs in the background…

thousands

Juicy

You’re a streamer in this case

You were playing your favourite game on stream

it just so happened to be juicy’s favorite as well

Let’s say the boys were doing a “if you laugh you donate”

Juicy laughed and chose you to donate to

Then got hyped when he saw the game

Had to donate like $100

you got fucking hype at the money amount

You also sort of knew who he was so you freaked out that too

let’s time skip to after you ended stream

you checked your phone to find a twitter notif from him asking to record with you sometime

You obviously instantly accepted duh

so you did

you knew you liked him but never once thought he felt the same i mean it was just professional right?

WRONG

he was head over heels for you

always finding ways to be close to you or talk to you

Always trying to make you laugh

I mean always

makes him happy y’know

when he asked you out, he was half asleep on a discord call and just blurted it out

You said yes but had to remind him in the morning

He then got bummed out about not being able to say it extravagantly

accepted it none the less

Mully

You were dating wayyyy before you began youtube

Usually playing horror games or watching scary animations

However you weren’t very public

the fans only found you when you posted your engagement tweet. ikr

they went insane over it and bombarded you both with questions

“when’s the wedding?”

“how long have you been together?”

And the obvious jokes

a few people were upset you kept it from them but it’s your life innit lol

You can keep whatever you want from them

You even posted a vlog with him planning your wedding.

The fans had no clue when it was but waited semi-patiently

WENT INSANE when you dropped the date

on the day, you posted on insta with all the cute photos of you two kissing and having fun

but had a VERY cursed caption

he however posted cursed videos like you drunk after the reception or

any of the boys doing dumb shit

but had one of the sweetest captions you’ve ever seen

when the full video of the wedding dropped there were HUNDREDS of edits made

almost brought a tear to your eye :,(

Josh

G-mod

You met in G-mod

now I think i could stop it there but i’ll go into detail

you were kinda fuckin around and you were pretending to be a receptionist

when juicy and reekid came in doing their usual shenanigans trying to rob you

the audacity

You switched it onto them ofc

and it made amazing content so he asked for your discord

you didn’t talk for a few weeks before you got a video recommended to you saying

“Psycho receptionist pulled a gun on me!”

You watched it and soon realise it was what you had done

You sent him a message along the lines of

“Psycho? i though i was pretty tame.”

He then sent you a message apologising and offering to change the title

you then pointed out the fact you were joking and he went back to usual josh

Then asked you to join him and Eddie for a scary discord video

you agreed and had a blast

I mean of course you did with your effortless humour

through that you gained quite a large following on your main channels

you continued to record with josh but also focused on your own channels too

after about half a year he confessed to you

i’m the middle of recording a G-mid video

at first you thought it was a bit

when you realised it was serious you instantly agreed.

you let the relationship move quite slow

and the fans loved you both together when you became public on your one year anniversary (with a tweet)

though many people pressured you to tell them if you had plans for marriage

your answer was always the same

“we’ll see how it goes.”

Hi lovelies! sorry for such a long absence life is fucking me over recently and I’m hoping you’re not too mad for the absence

also thank yous for 75 followers <33333

[youremyheaven]

U GUYYYSSS storytime:

So I got talking to a guy a little while ago and we vibed realllyyy well. He's lowkey the textbook definition of everything I'm looking for in a guy. He's 6'2, well to do (not rich but does veryyyy well for himself), BULKY BROAD SHOULDERED, Venusian etc

The synastry of our charts is insane 🥵 He had Mercury atmakaraka (remember my Mercury DK?? 😌)

He has a Venus Moon and stellium and he's the most Venusian guy I've ever met,,, he LOVES beauty, art, the female form etc and appreciates it. The way he spoke about it was so hot to me ngl,,, mf was so poetic,, he really knew how to speak sensually without ever being creepy or vulgar

His Mercury AK was in Purvabhadrapada and he had a puppy like softie Jupiter guy personality. I loved the fact that he looked like a WWE boxer (bulky af 🥵) but had the personality of a golden retriever. LITERALLY ALL MY DREAMS seemed to be coming true.

I knew his birthday but not his rising sign. Yk what they say about "if something's too good to be true, then it is" ??? yeah, i just couldn't brush off the feeling that something wasn't right. But I couldn't straightaway ask for his birth time, esp since he's Hindu and will know what's up 🤭😂 ANYWAAAYYYS we're talking and everything and this man is love bombing me HARD and I know it because:

a) I'm a retired love bomber myself

b) This is not my first rodeo

and anyways this 🧔🏻 is talking marriage and babies, he's calling me wifey 😭 (kinda cringe bc he's known me for dayyys but good lord handsome men can get away with anything 😤) and he refers to himself as "husband" 😭😭😭 like "husband's proud of you" and "your husband doesn't want you to apologise" 😭 (ew but he's hot 👉🏻👈🏻) and I let myself have my delulu moment and try to give him the benefit of the doubt bc literally he checks every box 🥹and he's soooo completely fond of me. We used to run in the same circles like 10yrs ago, even though I had no idea who he was and never interacted with him then, he told me that he remembered me from back then and thought I was cute 🥺 and later I took a looooong break from social media and he told me he'd wondered where I was all those years 🥹🥹and then I apparently showed up in his "suggested for you" on IG a few months ago and he instantly recognised me and followed me etc 🥺🥹 he's been tryna hmu for monthsssss now but I was with my ex 🤡and then I was recovering from my ex 🤧 so I didn't pay much attention to it. When he told me all this, it kinda made me melt 🫠 how he kept trying to talk to me even though I repeatedly ignored him etc

And he did everything right. I could text him rn and he'd reply in 5 seconds. He always asked me how I was, remembered things, always sent me like 20 different messages until I replied, showered me in compliments (Venusian men love to pour you with their attention, it can even be annoying lmfao) etc like there was nothing in his behaviour, his tone or his words that was giving me 🚩 he genuinely seemed sweet, caring etc and he loved babies 😩 and sent me videos with his nieces and nephews (man's was manipulator pro max) but YK ME 🤪 when I have a gut feeling ☝🏻 I can't ignore it 🤓 so I was very much waiting for the ball to drop and watch him fuck up somehow 💀 initially I felt sooo overwhelmed by all his love (bombing) that I felt like the bad guy for not reciprocating it or feeling that kind of "love at first sight" thing 🤡 BUT

one day he said "I can't believe I found you after 10 years, that means no matter where you are after another 10 yrs, I'll find you then as well" and I was like 🤨 I thought you wanted to marry me and make me your trophy wife 🧐 huh 👀 and he was all 😂😍haha yes ofc I'm just joking bbg 😍😂 but I knew there was more to it

Finally I got his birth time AND GUESS WHAT???

He's Hasta Rising 💀💀💀💀

Idk if you know already but I don't like Lunar men 🤡 and the minute I found out, I was SCREAMING bc 😭 why would God play me like that???? Put the most perfect guy, astrologically and otherwise, in front of me, I literally have him wrapped around my pinky and HE'S A LUNAR??? why God why 😭

But him & I had come too far for me to dump his ass for no reason 😬 (can't tell him it's bc the sus vibes I got from him was further bolstered by him being Lunar 🤭) so I was praying to God to give me an opportunity where he fucks up so that I can walk away 🚶🏻‍♀️from this situation before things get out of hand

AND GOD DELIVERED 😩

I was texting him the other day and he spoke about how he wants to spend as much time with me as he can before we go out to chase our dreams (move away from this city basically) and I was like 🤨so you're looking for a short term relationship?? And he was like 🥺 no never and I was like why tf would you say you want to marry me and have babies (1 boy and twin daughters 😭🤡💀) if you already know you cannot commit???? And he was like "because we could meet again in a few years and it would be nice to have this plan ready" 💀💀💀💀 HE ACTUALLY SAID THAT AKSKKSJSJDIID brother thinks my IQ is in the negatives bc WTF sort of explanation is that 😭 and i told him "this manipulation might work elsewhere but not on me, good luck tho, bye, I'm done here 💅🏻" and he went 180 and said "I'm so sorry, I was just trying to be funny, please give me another chance, all I meant is that we never know how things go so we can try to work things out but there's no guarantee, please I'm so sorry" 😂😂 and he called me like 3 times and finally said "Can we atleast still be friends? i can't lose you like this" AJSJJSJSJ THE AUDACITY 🤡💀🤡💀

but I just want to say thank you God for showing me his true colours and for giving me the opportunity to exit with grace and dignity and making him feel like a fool 😌✨

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

~*~

1. I remember that fic — lwg accidentally killed wwx and then raise Wen Yuan. JYL live in it. Sorry for mistakes — english is't my first language. Also it first time when I use tumblr too 😅 @derrenaissance​

FOUND? A Little Fall of Rain by Just_a_Girl_in_a_Crystal (T, 47k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Grief/Mourning, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fix-It, Golden Core Reveal, Protective LXC, Protective LQR)

~*~

2. A friend and I are hoping you can help find a fic for the next fic finder. It's a modern AU and LWJ is on the autism spectrum but wasn't tested until he was an adult because LQR either didn't want him tested or was in denial about it when LWJ was a child. There was possibly an aunt that was on the spectrum too. We can't remember anything else about it and have gone through the autistic lwj tag and our bookmarks on ao3 but none that we found sounded right. Thanks in advance!

FOUND! together, we’re just enough  by lulu_kitty (E, 134k, wangxian, past WWX/OFC, modern, younger LWJ,   bartender LWJ, older WWX, rich WWX, fluff, yearning, smut, bottom LWJ,   LWJ has scoliosis, slow burn)  

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3. Good day to all! There is a twitter fic that I wanted to read again but I forgot to save it (or like it). Can you help me find it?

Its about foxxian who goes into heat and he spend his heat with dragonji. Foxxian got pregnant and the jiang keep asking who is the father. Apparently, foxxian doesn’t know who is it. Then, when he gave birth, 3 eggs came out. The jiangs are shock. And when the eggs were hatch, all of them are dragons. So the jiangs knew now that the one who impregnant foxxian is a dragon from Lan Clan.

Thank you so much!

FOUND! Foxxian/Dragonji thread by @/cerbykerby (wangxian, cw: dubcon, mpreg, memory loss)    

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4. Hi! I wanted to know if anyone remembers that wangxian time travel fic where lan xicheng goes in this little sidequest where he adopts Xue Yang and Meng Yao??? I think??? And helped them have decent childhoods while wwx fixed everything else

FOUND? And Time Is But a Paper Moon  by sami (M, 138k, WangXian, XiChengQing, Time Travel, Fix-It, Everyone  Lives/Nobody Dies, Healing, Mental Health Issues, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, BAMF JYL, Getting Together) Lan Xichen is shown the future by Wwx via empathy. He finds XY and MY when they are still kids and brings them to Cloud Recesses.

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5. hi!! Thank you for all the hard work you are putting! I'm looking for fic where wwx is in the hospital after a car accident. When he wakes up he doesn't remember lwj because he has a six years memory loss and the two of them met five years prior to the accident. They were also about to get married. Lwj played the violin for a living and composed music for Disney if I'm not mistaken. Wwx was an engineer for prosthetic parts and he was working with wq. That's all I remember. If you have the time, I would love if you looked for it!

FOUND? High On Information by Latigra (M, 110k, WIP, WangXian, XuanLi, Hurt/Comfort, Amnesia, Established Relationship, Injury Recovery, Family Drama, Set in USA, Shitty US Healthcare System is Good for Fictional Drama, Modern AU, mild body horror, Traumatic Brain Injury, Warnings at End Notes, Past Drug Use, ADHD, Jealousy, Dom/sub Undertones)

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6. Hello! im looking for this wangxian fic that ive been missing for awhile now. I dont remember much but it was modern and everyone was a hitman or assassin (?) all i remember is that people were involved in the killing business. the only scene i remember is that JGS or JGY dies in the bathtub by being shot by LWJ or LXC. Oh thats another thing im pretty sure the way LWJ killed was by clean shots to the head. I know there's smut in it. It frustrates me so much that i cant remember more this was one of the first wangxian fics i remember reading

FOUND! 🧡 modus operandi by synonemous (E, 21k, WangXian, Modern AU, Serial killer WangXian, Eventual happy ending, WangXian's Canon Kinks, Smut) Not everything fits - they are serial killers and jgy dies in a bathtub, but he wasn't shot / I think #6 is modus operandi too! HGJ kills with headshots, but JGY gets taken out by ZWJ, who comes out of retirement just for that one personal hit.

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7. i have been remembering a fic where at the start wwx is engaged to jzx and lwj is engaged to jyl and obviously in the end they switched partners 😂 but idk the title or author, does this ring a bell for anyone? thanks in advance!!!!

FOUND? Neatly Arranged by thunderwear (T, 45k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, lwj’s mother is here but only briefly, RIP, Shenanigans, Fix-It, of sorts, Canonical Character Death, but not all, did i forget to tag pining, because this fic is like 90 percent pining, Hurt/Comfort)

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8. Hi i’m looking for a fic that I read a while ago but can’t find. Wei wuxian gets sent back in time after his death to the cloud recesses lectures. He ends up in the middle of a lecture and starts crying. He can’t handle it and attempts suicide by jumping off a cliff at cloud recesses but he is found and saved. I think he gets sanctuary or something but i’m not sure. Thank you your page is a life savor!! @st3wartladle​

FOUND? Without end by barisan (M, 70k, wangxian, major character death, time travel, suicide attempt, hurt/comfort, depressed WWX, protective LWJ, good uncle LQR, bad parents JFM & YZY, not YZY & JFM & Jiang friendly, implied/referenced child abuse & self harm, BAMF WWX, WIP) The scene you mention is right in the beginning of the fic.

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9. Looking for a vampire WWX/Hunter LWJ fic, that started with LWJ kneeling for the marriage ceremony and being bit, then the rest after that involved LWJ trying to keep away from WWX for his own good before they both get together. LWJ stays human. I think I found it on AO3? @bcaugust

It's not the right one(though it is one of my favorites and really close to the same vibe.) I also remember that the vampire bite would scar to indicate a spouse, if that helps anyone.

Not FOUND I Think Sunshine Would Treat Me Kind by vassal101 (T, 24k, WangXian, Exorcist LWJ, Vampire WWX, Human/Vampire Relationship, Fantasy, Vampire Bites, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Protective LWJ, Pining LWJ, Jealous LWJ, Pining WWX, POV LWJ, First Kiss, First Love, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Assassination Plot(s), Undercover Missions, Breaking Up & Making Up, Blood Drinking, Consensual Blood Drinking, horny vampire drinks from equally horny human, Falling In Love, i would say this is more angst than fluff, but it's not too too sad dw, Happy Ending, POV Third Person) reminded me of this one? Doesn't start with a wedding though, lwj simply arrives as a peace offering

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10. Hi!

So I'm looking for a fic that I can't find where I can't remember what exactly happened, but it goes something like this;

Lwj and Wwx are sleeping, Lwj gets a nightmare, and he doesn't tell Wwx about it, but he figures it out anyway and then Wwx waits to see whether Lwj will go back to sleep or have sex. They have rough sex in which Wwx specifically requests that he doesn't want to come. And then they talk (I think it was just outside on a porch or something?) And then Lwj fingers him and gets him off.

I'm sorry I don't remember more, I think it was one chapter and I'm really desperately trying to find this fic. If you could find it it would be much appreciated!!

Thank you!

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11. Heya mods, I'd really appreciate it if you could find this fic. It was about God Lan Wanji and him trying to find fellow god Wei Wuxian after he went missing. LWJ found him with the Dafan Wens and was living happily as a mortal with them. He wondered why WWX wasn't leaving or even thinking about his position as a god, but then it's revealed that his robes (which all gods need) were torn apart by the bad Wens. WWX also gives the robe to a'Yuan iirc. Read it on ao3, might've been a oneshot. @yetusagi

FOUND? Three Worlds, One Life by limedumplr (T, 9k, WangXian, Angels & Demons, Heaven & Hell, fairytale AU, Eternal Love Spinoff, Pining, happy ending I promise, Arranged Marriage, Forced Marriage)

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12. Hi! I’m looking for a fic where the jiang and wwx test their blood relation (not modern btw). I remember the rumor about sect leader jiang and wwx being father-son are just really just rumors because it shows that they are not related. However, when they test out madam yu and wwx blood, apparently they are related to each other. It turns out CSR’s parent is a sibling of Madam Yu’s parent (I dunno if they are really siblings but I know they a family) making it CSR related to Madam Yu (counsin ig)

Hi! I’m the #12 requester in the recent fic finder. Thank you but unfortunately it is not the one I’m looking for. I think the revelation of the blood related thing happened early chapter because as much as I can remember, madam yu treats wwx better after knowing they are related. She actually treats him as her nephew.

NOT FOUND! All Things Belong by kuroi_atropos (M, 64k, WIP, WRH & WWX, WangXian, WWX is a Wēn, Abuse, Whipping, Manipulations, Warning: WRH, Smart WWX, Possessive Behavior, Warning: JGS, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Past Rape/Non-con) it turns out in the later chapter that wwx is somehow related tu mdm yu via his grandmother (who was cssr's mother). And said grandmother was a distant cousin or just from yu

Unstoppbble by Immortal WangXian (Mr_Pervert) (M, 47k, wangxian, JC/LXC, JYL/JZX, immortal WWX, immortal LWJ, good parent YZY, good parent JFM, good uncle LQR, good XY, evil JGY, yin & yang cultivation, time travel fix-it, WN lives, MXY lives, WQ lives, supportive NMJ, YLLZ WWX, possessive LWJ, protective LWJ, fluff & smut, crack, action/adventure, mpreg, WIP)

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13. Hello, first I want to thank you for your service! I am looking for a fic where there's a scene where Lan Xichen sets up a dinner date to introduce Lan Wangji to his boyfriend Nie Mingjue. However, Nie Huaisang came to the restaurant because he lost his apartment keys and he was looking for his brother for help. NHS brought his bestie Wei Wuxian with him so LWJ mistook WWX as LXC's boyfriend. @ksoostrauma

FOUND? Man on My Mind by brooklinegirl (E, 50k, WangXian, Modern AU, Sex Cam Worker WWX, Identity Porn)

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14. just wanted to find a specific fic. It is one where wangxian time travel, and everyone is suspicious of them in the sunshot campaign. Jin guangshan suggests using a magic ball to spy on them, but it turns out they just end up combing each other's hair of something intimate but not shameless?

FOUND? lan xichen is very concerned (and confused) by theninjacat (T, 3k, WangXian, POV Outsider, Time Travel, Canon Divergence, Sunshot Campaign) I just read it, and the hair brushing spying thing was fresh on my mind and in my AO3 history!

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15. Hi! Please help. I lost some of the fics I was reading, and cannot remember where I first saw them (was using incognito at work, but there was an update and pcs got restarted). It's about the cultivation world punishing ppl, especially Wens, at the BM. During war, they see only Yiling is not attacked, and the guardian, who wears a mask and talks through WQ, accepts to help them if he gets married to a clan heir, as a warranty they won't turn on him. There's a scene where an assasain gets to the camp and is about to kill JYL, but Yllz saves her. Do you know it? @allthoselhb

FOUND? Tumblr post by ShanaStoryteller I think this is 15

15 sounds very familiar but I can't find the fic. If it helps, I think it's the one where YLLZ is walking around with a swirling mask of resentful energy all the time and never speaks, and Wen Qing is his voice. Everyone thinks WWX is dead

For 15, I don't THINK it's these, but have similar elements, so maybe, or at least interesting? I forget the name, but there's one fic where wwx and lz never met before the war, and wwx and the lans insist on an arranged marriage between him and a main clan member after the war (they live on burial mounds, not quite a sect kinda big household vibes) to kinda legitimize themselves to protect their people, thinking anyone sent by the clans to the "evil" yllz must be abused/not valued, so they'd actually be saving someone from a bad situation and into a married in name only respected guest situation. Only they get lz instead. Lxc is very worried for awhile thinking lz must be getting abused meanwhile yllz is a masked but perfect gentleman who proves to be a kind dedicated family leader/lord of the area and lz becomes sympathetic/supportive and ends up falling HARD for him and adores ayuan

there's also another one. Idk about a mask, but in it I think jgs? Tricks both wwx (backed by the bm wens) and the lans into thinking that each other are insisting on some sort of forced political marriage with each other, with the Jin being a "neutral party mediators" when actually the Jin are threatening and pressuring both sides into it/lying. Wwx lz and Co find out when they meet for first time on Jin grounds and unite against the jin.

there's also another fic featuring masks, where the yllz is more spooky unknown who always shows up wearing a full face? Silver mask, with the designs changing every now and then. You later find out that the identity of yllz is being shared between wwx, the wen siblings, and I think mxy? And this is during sunshot campaign after the sects asked for their help (tho they might of also offered it as a strategic move for themselves?)

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16. ive been looking for a fic where for some reason wwx stays with the nie after the ssc. nmj threatens to cut off wwx's tongue if he does demonic cultivation but wwx just depresses his life away instead. jgy blocks letters from everyone so hes really isolated. eventually nhs brings him out of his shell and hes eventually allowed outside his rooms. Later, lxc comes to play clarity/rest, and in the training grounds wwx has a panic attack after being accused of cursing jyl and her second pregnancy whoch he hadnt even known about. Now that i think about it, it probably actually takes place after qiongqi pass.

follow up for the imprisoned in the nie fic, im fairly sure that in the summary, nhs is like "you used to be so confident and happy..."

FOUND! Always walked a very thin line by tucuxi (T, 22k, WangXian)

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17. Hi, can you help me find these fics? I've been going crazy! They were on ao3; I hope they haven't been deleted!

A) I think wwx was a ghost, & found himself at the Cloud Recesses in the aftermath of lwj's punishment. Lwj was in bad condition and almost died (a couple of times?) Eventually there was some sort of ritual to bring wwx back into a physical body, & he was in the adjoining room bc he was also very weak. (NB: this is not the fic where wwx is actually astral projecting from Baoshan Sanren's mountain, it's a different one).

B) Lwj stayed at the Burial Mounds, & his health was very poor, he kept getting very sick quite often. At one point there was an epidemic in Yiling; some of the Wens died, and then they went to go help in the town bc of their medical knowledge. Lwj had to stay separate bc of his fragile health; he had to tend the fields alone and he couldn't attend the funerals.

Hi, I messaged recently for help finding 2 fics, so naturally I finally find one of them again not 24 hours later 🙈 The one with Lan Zhan in poor health at the Burial Mounds/the epidemic situation is Over the Rotted Bridge by vailkagami! I can't believe I forgot about the necromancy or Lan Zhan being mute!! I would still love your assistance with finding the other one 🙏🙏 Thank you!

17B)

FOUND! Over the Rotted Bridge by vailkagami (T, 314k, WangXian, Temporary Character Death, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, LWJ dies, Wei Wuxian doesn’t die, neither do (most of) the  wens, JYL also lives, Original Character(s), outside pov, YLLZ WWX,  Canon Divergence, CQL Verse, Illustrated, Grief/Mourning, Non-Consensual  Resurrection, mute LWJ, Hurt LWJ, Slow Burn, canonical death of a child  (mentioned), Survivor Guilt, PTSD)

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18. hi!! for the next fic finder, i have been looking for a fic for a few weeks but since it's been some time ive read it, its lost in my history. it was a time travel fic, where wangxian get back into their bodies during the wen indoctrination. the pov was actually jc's if im not mistaken, but i remember clearly that in the end he accuses lwj of seducing wwx into demonic cultivation, after wx kill the wens there and wwx raises an army. thank you <3

FOUND! I’m pretty sure this one is ❤️ Wen Chao’s Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day by Shializaro (T, 2k, wangxian, time travel, BAMF wangxian, outsider POV, Mojo’s post)

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19. Hello! For the next fic finder, can you help find this fic? It's a sickly WWX because of his live in the street before. I dont remember much but there was a horse riding lesson, he learn about strategy, and when he make a journey alone to make his sword. In his journey he met with imperial soldiers that patroled around capital and befriend them. I think he calmed a resentful mother cat too i think. It's a WIP story. I read that recently in this year but i think it was a fic from around 2019-2020? Thank you @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

FOUND! A Burning Cold by MountainRose (G, 29k, Chronic Illness, Pre-Canon, Nirvana in Fire Fusion, Character Study, Wen Bullshit, Snow Beetle Poison) is a sort of Nirvana in Fire fusion called A Burning Cold by MountainRose locked to archive here / but it's restricted for logged users;

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20. Looking for a fic where the focus iirc was more on LWJ teaching/raising lan juniors to express their emotions healthily.

Sorry, I don't think it's To be of use, I remember it being something shorter. Also WWX came back towards the later part of it.

not FOUND To be of use by Erisette (Not Rated, 53k, LSZ & LWJ, Found Family, Accidental Baby Acquisition, (kinda), Father-Son Relationship, Missing Scene, Good Teacher LWJ, Seclusion Lite(TM), Fluff, Worldbuilding)

FOUND? Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses by hansbekhart (Not Rated, 19k, LSZ & LWJ, WangXian, dad wangji, LWJ’s Questionable Parenting Skills, Grief/Mourning, Recovery, Injury Recovery, Hopeful Ending, Canon-Typical Violence)

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[wtfliaa]

Feedback for my moodboard/reading.

Sorry if is long but couldn't describe it in just few lines plus you worked so hard and it shows!!

I admit it I'm not good at writing down my excitement and English not being my native language is another barrier, but if I tell you that as I saw the moodboard (the whole reading too) I let out the most embarassing noises and I wanted to flip tables (from excitement) can sum up my reaction and convey the really strong emotions I felt ?

This is honestly one of the best descriptions of my fs I had, from the moodboard to the reading. A lot of physical and personality traits you picked up on is exactly what I manifested for my future spouse and it makes me happy knowing that the universe heard me. Oh dear, you don't have to apologize for going a bit "over limit" because you did the right thing and I even thank you soo much for going over limit because it makes everything even more hot and I was blushing 🔥🤭

Now, how did you know I have a crush on Nicholas Chavez ???? 😭😭 plus manly and good looking??? stern, dominant and assertive??? literally the man of my dreams you mean!!! 😍😍 As for the rbf, I love it how the universe aligns things because I have a pic of me captioned "RBF" bec of my face and my future spouse has it too wow plus I got that in different fs PAC's and also other things you mentioned like working out a lot and turning heads when we walk in a room. This is soo cute!

Also, thank you so much for your sweet words. Indeed, my self-esteem is not high (I tend to hide my selfies behind other posts), but your words really cheered me up 🥺

Now the songs omg!!! I listened to all of the them and each one resonated even if I already knew some of these, so it was a further confirmation of my fs, I'm a big fan of Lana Del Rey and The Weeknd so the fact you channeled those songs I love it! 😍

Finally, I love every single words from my reading and every single photo from my moodboard. If you wanted me to feel all the passion, the intensity and the love coming from both, you succeeded. I think you're incredibly gifted and an amazing reader! 💯 👏

Thank you so much and great job!! ♥️♥️

Nichols Chavez is actually an Aries rising Virgo Leo moon Sun( no disrespect to his girlfriend but u could even marry this man lmao, or marry someone the resemblance hims. Anddd ofc I know why ur attached to him because of that Aries,Virgo, and Leo energy lol.) so that’s why I was picking up Nicholas and Vinnie Hacker. ANYWAYS I READ THE WHOLE THING AND I COULDN’T HELP BUT SMILE IN HAPPINESS AND GRATITUDE. This is my first ever gameeeee!! And last week I’ve started the blog 🤍 I am a quick learner, and really caught onto astrology very fast. AND YOUR VERY WELCOME! This made me so happy you don’t understand ! And thank you for sharing your time to listen to the songs I’ve listed. And to be honest I was also quite scared that it didn’t resonate with you because I didn’t receive feedback yet SO THANK U (I am literally still a baby, but I’m wise beyond my years. And I appreciate the praise that I have been receiving from others ❤️)

[clouddi-exe]

Hi hello, here's some headcanons about Narinder.

(sorry about the delay, I'm a hockey fan and have been watching hockey to support our team)

So, in my cult he and his siblings (Leshy, Hekket, Kallamar and Shamura) wear the modest robe, because let's be honest, they are the old bishops, so they get special treatment (yes i pick favorites)

Nari shares a tent with Baal and Aym, ofc sleeping in the middle (I gave both Aym and Baal the skull necklace so that they can keep Nari company for as long as possible).

*Side note, I call the lamb Lamby and use they/them pronouns for them

Now for the headcanons:

Narinder used to not be that fond of Lamby, due to the "backstab" Lamb did, however, still in the back of his mind he appreciated Lamb's actions of deciding to spare him instead of killing him.

Narinder used to have mean and hurtful comments to Lamby, which they did not really listen to and try as much as possible to give all the bishops a comfortable and nice place to sort of rest.

After some time, Nari started more so ignoring them, however, tried to keep an eye on them as well. Once Lamby returned from crusades, trying to pretend he did not worry if Lamby returned with bruises and wounds. He made sure to protect Lamby in the night (due to being a cat, he's nocturnal, moon necklace) as they slept.

The flock still does not like Narinder, they blame him for most of the things that have happened to them. The flock has tried many times to sabotage his tent, and basically anything he did, however he always managed to scare them off.

Lamby once noticing the signs that Narinder grew a liking to them, started talking to him, spending more time in his tent etc etc...

Narinder seems cold to the flock, even to Lamby, even tho once they are alone with each other, he tends to show a little but of emotions, sadly, not being that good at it, due to being chained for so long and not feeling anything besides anger and hatred.

To the flock Narinder's face shows no emotion, just a blank stare, which most take as a sign of hate and/or dislike.

Lamby and Narinder later get married, because they both find they have feelings for each other.

The flock ask for help from Shamura to sabotage one of Lamby's crusades, not to kill them, but to hurt them enough to warn and scare Narinder, which he does not take well and starts to be a little more aggressive who even tries to touch Lamby and being very jealous.

However, Lamby and Nari are both happy together and take care of each other.

I forgot to add that even tho the in-game model of Narinder has his third eye closed, my little head canon is that he never closes it, because around the flock he does not feel safe, but around Lamby, he does close it.

That's the end of my rambling!!! I'll work on Lamby next, just gotta finish one thing before I start :)

Thanks for listening to me ramble 🫶

[sylenth-l]

I just wanted to come in and say your art has made me completely feral. I didn't ship Felsiris before your art, but you've made that ship just as important to me as Felmur or FelShaxx. Your art is so good, the way you capture them is just. HNSNYJEYJRUJRNUNUJTBR i am rattling my cage, I am totally normal. Thank you for the food.

Aww, thank you! Please enjoy!! 😂💙 Can't say anything about felshaxx since it's not my thing, but I love felmur dearly and nothing can change that ofc, they have that lovely air of an old married couple, which I find so comforting and endearing. Felsiris? felris?? whatever - has a very different dynamic I'm chewing into slowly and observing from different angles. Or more like got hit with it like a train skdhfksds No matter how you see them, it's just such a classic union of things that are opposite yet the same by its nature. Like fire and ice. Sun and moon. Snowy mountains and dusty desert. Heater and refrigerator. It's very poetic and always mesmerizing to witness.

[megamindsupremacy]

Do you have any Spiderman fic recs? (Preferably not MCU but. I'm not picky)

YES ofc. Let me dig through my bookmarks for some. Warning- most of them will be Team Red fics because that’s where I interacted most with the Marvel fandom back in the day. Also, coming back after making this, unfortunately most are at least a little bit MCU influenced but I tried to stay away from the tropier/irondad/ooc fics

-

Inimitable by deniigiq

“Peter, is it supposed to be doing that?” One of his students asked him. He looked up to see the industrial-strength magnets he’d collected for this lab trying to crack through the glass between them to be reunited. The glass splintered.

“Yeah, no. That’s totally fine,” he lied. Then he inconspicuously chased everyone to the corner of the lab, donned a glove, and smashed the glass so that it wouldn’t splinter and stab someone in the eye in its explosion.

His students cheered.

He needed a drink.

(Peter gets called back to the city at the age of 25 to help mitigate the rapidly increasing crime rate. He's in way over his head, so he sets out to re-establish Team Red.)

(Classic Team Red fic, this author got me into the fandom years ago and I’ve been stuck since)

-

Say You Will, Say You Won’t by Traincat

Johnny Storm found him on a Friday afternoon, wearing the kind of beseeching look that filled Peter with dread.

“I need to ask you a favor,” he said.

“No,” Peter said, swinging away.

__

Peter and Johnny get married, really-not-really.

(A classic Spidertorch fic, absolutely hilarious and not even a little bit MCU-touched)

-

Peter Parker: Legend of Empire State by Popjeckdoom

There was a dorm room, at the end of the third floor hallway on the male side of student housing, that was a mystery to all the students of Empire State. #339, Peter Parker.

The dorm itself wasn’t strange. It wasn’t haunted or cursed in any way, or as far as anyone knew. The door looked like everyone else’s; a doodle of Spidey on the whiteboard, a random scratch at the bottom left corner of the door, likely from someone moving in, etc. What made this ordinary room into a legend was it’s mysterious inhabitant, whom many believed did not even exist.

Peter Parker. The Criptid of Empire State.

(Technically incomplete, but it’s a series of oneshots so do with that what you will)

-

Dumpster Fires Verse by deniigiq

Peter and May receive a notice to vacate.

The other guys on Team Red have been there before, they offer a bit of advice.

(Another deniigiq classic, it’s a series of interconnected fics that don’t need to be read together to make sense)

-

Can you hear the drumming? (there’s a revolution coming) by Crescent_Blues

"You know how to throw a punch?"

Peter stops fidgeting and his heartbeat slows as he breathes deep and forces it to calm. The endorphins aren't quite there yet but he can almost taste the excitement, the hopefulness. Like carmel, like yellow, like tacky sweetness.

"Don't tuck your thumb into your hand and keep your wrist and arm straight?"

He has the basics.

That's a good start.

Right?

(Matt accidentally acquires one Peter Parker at the ripe old age of eleven and becomes the mentor he never wanted to be)

(This one comes courtesy of my friend Moon, who will kill me if he knew I was reccing his fic, but the writing style and quality is top notch so I refuse to stop. Also incomplete, but there’s 160k words before you get to the end so there’s a lot to read)

-

Peter Parker’s Home for the Wayward Villain by BeanieBaby

A really long redemption story.

(Another classic, Peter buys a house and adopts+reforms like 90% of the Marvel villains)

-

Roundabout by Gruoch

“Are you being killed right now?” Tony asks. “Am I listening to your final moments?”

“Maybe,” Peter chokes out, weakly pedaling his legs in the air while he futilely scrambles to pry the hand away from his throat.

Tony releases a sharp huff, irritated. “You are absolutely not allowed to die right now. Your graduation is a month away. Pepper’s moved around all her meetings to be free that day, and I’ve already given the deposit to the catering company for your party. I can’t get it back if I have to cancel now because of your untimely demise.”

***

In which Peter attempts to survive long enough to graduate, Tony moonlights as a semi-professional party planner, and absolutely nothing goes according to plan.

(This one is just. Peter Parker’s terrible horrible no good very bad day but in the best way)

-

Spider Season by selador

Peter Parker is Ben Urich's intern at the Bulletin. He's alright, as far as interns go. Bad coffee, but he fights crime bosses who want Ben dead. That wins a lot of points with Ben, that's for sure.

(Mostly follows the plot of DD s1 but still a great fic)

-

WHAT sugar daddy(s)??? By o1nm

"I've never really thought about it," Peter sniffs, gazing sadly into his mostly empty cup. "Maybe uh... maybe somebody who buys me milkshakes whenever I want? I don't know."

MJ's eyebrows twitch minutely. "Really?"

"Yup," Peter says lightly, "really," despite the fact that he feels like he just signed some sort of demonic treaty. "Hey, do you think we could circle back and -"

"I'll go get you another," MJ tells him as she snatches his previous milkshake, dropping it in a trashcan on her way as she sashays back to the ice-cream store.

...Weird.

(*slaps roof of Peter* this boi can fit so much autism in him. But honestly he’s so oblivious throughout, it’s amazing)

-

Always Glad You Came by aloneintherain

Spider-Man is a relatively new, controversial vigilante, and Johnny has a crush the size of the Empire Building. The Four - operating under the assumption that Spidey is an adult - do not approve.

“I just happen to think Spider-Man's cool,” Johnny says, matter-of-factly. “A hero can think another hero is cool without making it weird. I admire his aloofness. And his badass-ness.”

“His aloofness,” Ben repeats, chuckling into his mug of beer. It’s roughly the size of Johnny’s head. “Yeah, sure, I bet that’s all your admire, right?”

(Another Spideytorch classic, with So Many Misunderstandings it’s amazing they can walk straight)

[mercurygray]

Golden Needle, Silver Thread

I'm so excited to finally get this idea on paper - it's an OFC idea I've had bouncing around in my head for a little while for House of the Dragon and I'm so glad she finally found her name.

Fandom: House of the Dragon Warnings: Implied sexual situations, Aegon being Aegon

The men were back early this afternoon.

She was getting used to thinking quickly on her feet, since she'd come here - things moved much faster than they did at home, and here even the smallest thing, like the house's menfolk coming back from a hunt, was a cause to be wary.

The shift she was mending was still in her lap, but her fingers folded, underneath it, around her scissors, small but sharp enough to hurt. It would be better to have a knife, her sister Hylda had said, but that can't always be hidden.

Her sister had also told her to sit watching the doors for occasions like these. But why, she'd asked, confused as anything. Because of the house, her sister had said darkly. And because of the men.

The door opened and she rose from her chair, pleasant as anything and never once surprised, the scissors hidden in her hand.

"Prince Aegon,” she said brightly. “You're home early."

After six months, she knew her sister had been right to say it. This house. And this man.

A great honor, the letter to her parents had said. Position in the royal household as mistress of the robes - a lady in waiting to the Princess Helaena. I have had good reports of your daughter Iselde's conduct, and her care and attention to detail in all matters of deportment and grace...

"You'll be serving the royal family, just like your brothers," her grandmother had said happily from her seat by the fire. The Queen's letter was still out on the table, written in a clear hand and carrying her personal seal, the flame within a seven-pointed star, distinct in deep green wax.  "What an honor for the Cargylls - two names in the White Book and a lady in waiting!"

"Honor indeed," Hylda had said darkly, and wouldn't say more until Gran had gone to bed.  "Look, Sis, Gran hasn't been to court since the days of Good Queen Alysanne. It's changed a bit there since then."

Iselde knew her lessons well enough, the great family trees that her mother had made sure they all knew by heart. Jaeherys married Alysanne, and had issue, 13 children, which was unlucky, since all of them died, and his grandson Viserys married once for love and once for duty, and had issue, two daughters and three sons...

And oh, what sons.

Was it any wonder none of the other ladies liked to be here? It was easier to find them in Queen Alicent’s rooms, huddled around their aunts and mothers, sharing the day’s gossip. The only threat there was Prince Aemond and his prattle of the practice yard. His brother was a different beast entirely, and one to be avoided if you liked your virtue. 

The Prince looked to be in low spirits today - his boots were splattered with mud and his cloak would need a good brushing, but there was no evidence of blood anywhere on his person - usually a sign that he hadn't managed to make a kill while they were out. That would leave anyone in a foul mood, but Aegon more than most.  "The sport was poor and my horse was tired," he reported. “How long were we out, Cargyll?”

Behind him, her brother Arryk looked even more uncomfortable in his muddy white cloak. Visenya had meant for the Kingsguard to be royal bodyguards, but she’d never planned her uniforms for some of the things the Tagaryens got up to. “A good four hours, your Grace.”

“Four hours,” the Prince said, throwing his gloves down on the table. “And not a fucking thing to show for it except a sore backside. Now, where is my lady wife?" he asked, clearly not thrilled by the prospect of finding her. "The maesters have told me the moon is good for making babies this week and my balls need to breathe."

Iselde took a step away from her chair and steeled her shoulders. “His Grace shall have to come back later," she said, planting herself in front of the door, mindful still of the scissors in her hand. "The Princess is indisposed at the moment."

No one had told her that standing up to the Prince would be part of her regular responsibilities. She thought, perhaps, now that no one had told her that because no one had dreamed it could be done.  But Aegon still seemed …amused by it.  He stared at her a moment and then laughed. "What a perfect tyrant your sister is, Cargyll. See how she stands and turns me away! Perhaps I'll have her instead,” he said, stepping forward a pace or two and moving her closer towards the door. “Since it seems Helaena's out. My grandsires took second wives to serve their pleasures,” he added, his short blonde hair just brushing her face, and she could smell clove on his breath - the spiced wine he liked in the morning to chase away the night before. “What's to stop me? I've got a needle here in need of a case and a strong hand to get it there." He leered closer, her back against the smooth wood of the door so she could feel all of him, and over his shoulder she could see her brother glowering, his hand on the hilt of his sword.

"I doubt your mother would approve," Iselde cut in quickly, before Arryk had a chance to say anything out of turn. (Brothers were like that, weren't they? And one of these days they'd say something and Aegon would make them regret it.) "A Crownlands girl is hardly good enough for the heir to the throne." She tried to make it sound like logic. Alicent liked her well enough as a lady in waiting, but a daughter - or a second wife? Hardly likely. Iselde could still remember her parents discussing the news of Aegon and Helaena's wedding, and how the Queen had held her tongue and would not touch her wine. Everyone was still reeling a bit from the Princess Rhaenyra's abrupt marriage to her uncle, two years before, and a second Targaryen marriage was...rather a lot.

"Bugger my mother," the Prince said dismissively. "A Crownlands girl's good for what I need now."

"Perhaps at the Bell they'll have sweeter sport, my prince," Arryk interrupted. "You know my sister's unbedded and unlikely to serve you well."

"And your lady mother did say she would look in," Iselde added, on a whim.

It was a game they played, a kind of hellish pass the parcel, trying to distract him away from the goal. But that did it - Aegon wasn't threatened by many things, but his mother finding him trysting wasn't high on his list of desires - an unhappy consequence of too many such instances as a younger man. The chances of Alicent visiting in the middle of the afternoon were slim - she was far too busy with the Small Council - but Aegon didn't know that, and it worked. He snarled and pulled away, departing the room in a whirl of cloak and sword, Arryk in close and grateful pursuit to one of his regular Flea Bottom stews.

Iselde leaned back against the door and breathed again, feeling the metal of the scissors in her hands, warm now that she’d been holding them so close for so long. He was worse when Erryk or Arryk attended him - a cheap amusement to see them squirm while he said the most vile things. On days when Ser Criston or Ser Loras were with him he paid her no mind at all. He hates his marriage - hates that he's had to wed his sister when no one else in the realm would need to. That's all it is.

She heard the lock turning behind her, and quickly stepped away from the bedroom door, hastening back to her chair and her sewing before the Princess peeked out, freshly arisen from an afternoon nap.

"You said I was indisposed again."

It was always a statement - never a question. Iselde nodded. The truth was always best, with Helaena. Not because she saw it, the way the others always said she did. The Princess only liked straightforward people. It was one of the first things Iselde had learned, when she'd first come to King's Landing. Aegon likes wine, Aemond likes books, and Helaena likes things that crawl, and the truth. "I thought you would not like to see him, your grace. He was... in an amorous mood."

"You're good at lying," Helaena said simply. "Like Mother is." She looked at Iselde's sewing, and the front of her gown. "Did he touch you?"

She knew there wasn't any harm meant by the question, but it still hurt her to answer.  "Only a little." 

"It bothers you, when he does that. Because you think it bothers me."

I know it doesn't bother you, Iselde thought to herself, her heart tight in her chest. But it feels disloyal, somehow - that he should be so open in scorning you. I know that it would bother other women, to have their husband look at someone else. But I know you are not like other women are, and your marriage is…different, too.

"He does it to everyone," Helaena continued, unperturbed. "Mother thinks I don't notice but I do. But you're the only one who distracts him with it. To be kind to me." 

Iselde had to still her needle, and swallowed. “I hope I am kind, your Grace,” she said, and meant it. There’s so little kindness in the world for women like you.  But there was something else. “He’ll be back this evening, I think. The maesters said -”

Helaena nodded - she’d already heard. How long had she been lying there, behind her door, listening? She hears more than people think she does. “They are right, in their accounts?”

Iselde nodded. Mistress of the robes meant mistress of the sheets, and the bleeding cloths, and every single speck of clothing sent to the laundrywomen. That was where the maesters got their information, but she knew Halaena’s moon cycles as well as her own. The twins were nearly a year old, now, but an heir and a spare wouldn’t do for the House of the Dragon. Helaena must have another child.  “I’m just fixing the shift you like,” she said, holding it up for the Princess to see. “The one that doesn’t scratch. And I’ll have the kitchen send up a tea, and put a hot stone in the fire, for after.”

“He’ll want wine.”

“He can get that in his own apartments,” Iselde said, her voice sharper than she meant it to sound, jabbing the needle into her work.

 Helaena laughed - a short, happy sound. “Who needs a dragon to guard you when you have a goose?”

Most women wouldn’t like being called a goose, Iselde thought, watching the Princess dip into her collecting boxes to pull out her centipede and let it play through her hands. But that’s the Cargyll crest, and I suppose I do guard you, your Grace. And maybe it’s not as noble as a dragon - but everyone knows what it’s good for, at least.

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