#not me being melancholic because of 2010 song

[ps-cactus]

when the world surrounds you, I'll make it go away.

[thesinglesjukebox]

CAMILA CABELLO FT. PLAYBOY CARTI - "I LUV IT"

Per our controversy score, it's more iluvit ihateit iluvit ihateit iluvit ihateit iluvit...

[6.47]

Katherine St. Asaph: wtf (complimentary) [7]

Hannah Jocelyn: “I Luv It" is a perfect example of once avant-garde sounds being absorbed into the mainstream -- which is why people hate it -- but the way all involved fail makes it much better than it otherwise would be. Everyone involved doesn’t know how to work outside the lines of pure pop, and it shows. We have a IV-I-V-ii chord progression, normally too melancholic for upbeat electronica outside of “Off-World”, and we have a classic AABB chorus, only the AAs are iluvitiluvitiluvitiluvit and the BBs are Gucci Mane samples. Cabello is much more fun in this mode than crooning nicotine-Halloween-morphine “Never Be The Same” mode, and if she still comes across as try-hard, that adds to the song’s bizarre alchemy. Carti’s dispassionate mumbling nearly kills it, but listen to the beautiful synth arpeggio he’s up against. “I Luv It” is too structured to be incoherent, too clean to be overwhelming, and all those contradictions make the song legitimately captivating, far from the trainwreck intended. [8]

Isabel Cole: I almost admire this track’s staunch refusal to be an actual song; between its near-total disinterest in conventions like “melody” and “structure” and the fact that its hooks sound like they were recorded by a pull-string doll running out of batteries, you could almost call it avant-garde. Unfortunately, none of its repetitive noodling sounds interesting or good, hence “almost.” Carti’s verse (counterintuitively?) comes closest to achieving one of those things (song, interesting, good), although I’m not sure which one, and despite the fact that he is so inscrutable it’s like listening to a rap verse by the Swedish Chef. [3]

Alfred Soto: I like it, but it took getting used to Cabello's voice squeaking ILUVITILUVITILUVIT against a synth arpeggio. Because Cabello's always sounded like a synth anyway, the track's an exercise in harmony. [6]

Mark Sinker: Obviously I should stop trusting the mondegreen as insight generator -- but “I was on the train with the MEKONS!” Enter Greil Marcus to solve the case, in deerstalker like the Inspector in the Pink Panther cartoons, his enormous magnifying glass from our direction enlarging only his own eye (affectionate). Down these so-pretty streets a man must go who is not himself pop, who is neither tarnished nor afraid! He is the hero; he is Playboi Carti, mumblier perhaps than anyone in muttering history… [squeaks: ah!] [10]

Alex Clifton: Am I supposed to understand any of the words in this song? [3]

Taylor Alatorre: "Doctorin' the Tardis" with less self-awareness yet somehow even greater contempt for its target audience, which in this case is Millennial-Zoomer cuspers who assign mystical significance to Project X and Spring Breakers because they first saw those films before being old enough to drive. I'm opposed to it in principle -- but principle hasn't stopped me from listening to it 83 times in the past month. Mainly that's because of how the brute-force Gucci Mane sample tries to hack my brain into thinking it's actually hearing "Lemonade" for those 12 to 24 seconds. No chopping or screwing, no tenuous lyrical tie-ins, just unadulterated 2010 high school cafeteria bliss. It's such a childishly brazen tactic, like a couple of teenagers trying to sneak their vodka-filled water bottles into an all-ages show, that I can't help but nod respectfully toward it. Given all this, Playboi Carti might not seem to be the correct punchline to this joke, and if Camila had been able to wrangle a Riff Raff or Trinidad James onto here, the unified kitsch factor alone would've earned the song's full acquittal. But it's in the parts where he isn't aiming for gibberish-fueled virality that Carti justifies his presence here. "Oh you on a roll now?" feels like a playful negging of all the cheap XCX cosplay we've just had to sit through, and "she says I'm way too young" is such a teasing last-second aside, turning the very act of Guwop-sampling into a vague metaphor for shooting one's shot cross-generationally... or something. What exactly is one supposed to do with that, other than try to unlock some other secret meaning on the 84th listen? [6]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: You luv it, but she got it.  [6]

Leah Isobel: The Charli XCX Twinks are hyperprotective of their right to feel alternative and unique, so Camila ripping off the cadence and delivery of "I Got It" (not to mention the Hereditary-biting promotional video) would of course send that particular portion of the internet into overdrive. But it's the prerogative of the actual, charting popstar to execute stylistic hairpins, particularly if she's navigated the label system well enough to actually release something as chart-poisonous as "I Luv It," extra-particularly if she's already played around in this sandbox, and extra-super-particularly if the song represents the first time she's found a convincing vehicle for her unbelievably annoying energy. Honestly, I couldn't tell you why I like this so much -- maybe it's the memory of liking the similarly fried-out Lazerproof, or the maturity to recognize that to be cringe is to be human -- but I do. Sorry! If the song slaps, I can't make it not slap!  [9]

Nortey Dowuona: "You two have been saying one bar is lame and the other one is awesome ALL NIGHT, and it's the same BAR?!!!" -- Troy from Community and me after four listens. [2]

Andrew Karpan: Every micro-generation gets the “I Love It” that it deserves. I love it. [10]

Ian Mathers: Look, it's not my fault that the degree of difficulty you've set yourself is "will this make the listener not want to just go listen to the classic Icona Pop/Charli XCX song 'I Love It' instead?" Credit to the post chorus and Carti's digitally slurred moan of a verse for making it a bit of a fight, but... [7]

Michael Hong: The most captivating word here is that sighed "tomorrow" right before the first chorus. Everything seems to go quiet as she breathes into it, the catharsis of having what you want in your reach, the high of forever in your sight. Cabello never sounds like she'll get there -- "I Luv It" is just one big, provocative, braindead pursuit for your attention, for you to see her as a captivating pop star -- but as her tongue darts across her lips and echoes the titular phrase over and over, there's the thrill she's been looking for. [7]

Kayla Beardslee: This is not a song, this is engagement bait. I cannot be bought this easily! Stream La Buena Vida! [3]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: It's odd that everyone is treating this as some kind of oddity; this is a Camila Cabello song, for God's sake! It's the same format as her big hit and the middling replicant (who cares about "Senorita"), just adapted for the current moment rather than the long 2010s; glitchy pop sounds are not some shocking play when it's been two presidential terms since "Vroom Vroom." Even the "Lemonade" sample feels correctly positioned – it's millennial dad rap, the exact kind of respectable pophead interpolation-fodder that Cabello, Carti, and producer Jasper Harris all probably loved as teenagers. "I Luv It" is a perfect showcase for Cabello's admittedly limited skillset; she sounds appropriately wan on the verses and cheerleader-ish on the chorus, comfortable with just being another element in Harris & El Guincho's anachronistic Pop 2 revival. Yet "I Luv It" reaches the mountaintop only upon Carti's arrival – the track pauses for a second before he starts his verse as if it's hard reloading; he then proceeds to duet with a synth solo, do his best Dirty Sprite 2-era Future impression, and go so incomprehensible that I'm not even sure if anyone else on the track knows what he's saying. Glorious. [9]

Dave Moore: I'm confident that everything that everyone who has scored this song a [4] or below says about it is accurate. But a clusterfuck contains multitudes.  [8]

Will Adams: Above all else, it's WEIRD. Strip away the stan chatter and "I Luv It" becomes an appealingly bizarre pivot in which Cabello is enraptured by a frenetic hook, woozy synths and a potentially asymmetric meter. When Playboi Carti's smeared verse arrives, you start to feel delirious. [6]

Julian Axelrod: An unrecognizable Camila Cabello, sounding like she's trying to will herself back to 2012 and secure the Spring Breakers audition she rightfully deserves. An uninterpretable Playboi Carti, facing his biggest moment in the spotlight with a burp and a shrug. An unexplainable "Lemonade" sample, as if producer El Guincho just heard The State vs Radric Davis that morning and decided he was put on this earth to get Gucci Mane a publishing check. None of it gels, none of it makes sense in the same song, none of it even makes sense in the same breath. I can only assume Camila and Co. created this incredible, idiotic Diet Coke and Mentos monstrosity to give guys like me something to be annoying about all summer. [8]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: Was kind of thrilling when it dropped but enough time has passed where this doesn't really hold up. I can only be so amused by Camila sort of just being there (she's not doing anything particularly well, nor is she flailing in any notably outrageous manner). Carti arrives with a decent verse, and then it's over. Music to be momentarily amused by and not much else. [5]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[latenightgasstationwalk]

My number 1 album of 2013. Queens of the Stone Age were in full effect on this one. Known for making significant thematic and stylistic changes to their sound, approach and delivery with almost every subsequent album, QOTSA saw the most drastic change in their sound yet with like clockwork. In my opinion it was their most ambitious move musically still to this day. 

Coming out a whopping 6 years after “era vulgaris” (another all time favorite of mine, and the only record I own on vinyl) a lot of fans were left wondering where the queens sound would go next.

As a musician who is constantly consuming, studying and obsessing over different styles of music, I’ve come to find that my standards aren’t high at all when it comes to what I’ll listen too. I know this is like a joke sentence people make fun of, but with the exception of music that has harmful political overtones I really will listen to anything and everything. And in my time doing so I discovered there’s really only 2 criteria I look for in an album to gauge its quality. So long as it sounds good and so long as it sounds new to me.

Like clockwork is an enigma in mainstream rock music in my opinion. With the title track “keep your eyes peeled” which as far as I know (I’m fairly certain) is the only song on the record that was recorded in C standard tuning, in line with a lot of their earlier albums where josh would play guitar tuned down way low, in C standard, through ampeg bass amps. But the song starts with an oppressive and looming rhythmic chug on that low C string that gives you the feeling an insurmountable force is striding towards you with ill intent. And the song only continues that way up until the very last second. The song sounds like a theme song written for the scariest guy in a place you’d never want to be. Only to completely blindside you with the next track “I sat by the ocean” that has this dreamy, optimistic yet melancholic post-beach rock sound too it.

And if you’re a budding guitarist? There is so many hidden guitar riff gems on this album. “I appear missing” and “my god is the sun” have some of the most infectious guitar riffs of the 2010’s. As well as some of the most hypnotic and addictive bass lines. I’ve always said queens of the Stone Age is one of those bands that you get so much out of if you’re a musician that loves to absorb every kind of musical sound you can. I think most people would be hard pressed to find a band that has such an inconsistent approach to music, but rock steady consistency in quality and sound. (Maybe king gizzard and the lizard wizard)

Every track is a pleasant surprise, I seriously think the band was at their best here, as I said my 2 number 1 criteria for any music is a simple “does it sound good?” And “does it sound new?” and I can’t stress the second one enough, excluding other genre’s and speaking exclusively on modern rock music, it’s very hard to find an artist that’s releasing versatile albums that expand into a wide array of other sub-genres or at least takes influence from them to create a rock track that is adjacent to another genre ever so slightly. QOTSA does that flawlessly here and every track is worth so many listens. One of the only albums I’ve found that has 0 skips. Even their most critically acclaimed album “songs for the deaf”, which I love very dearly, has a song I always skip on it. (It’s called 6 shooter, it’s just too fucking loud and annoying) and it’s kinda hard to give a 10 to an album that has a song that you always skip because it’s that bad.

But on like clockwork, every song is substantially different, well written, perfectly executed and so well thought out. every song keeps you guessing where it’s going next. Like being lead through a labyrinth by a guide who makes you wonder if he even knows how to read the map. But you follow anyway, because the adventure keeps you longing for whatever comes next.

But again, I cite this album as a massive influence on me and the music I make, and I can’t think of another rock album from that time that stuck with me for this long. Highly highly highly

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

[pacxroma]

Honey by Robyn (2018)

Score: 8.5

Robyn's intimate and luscious 8th studio album was proof that she still creates phenomenal dance music when she chooses to. Her first studio album since her groundbreaking Body Talk trilogy from 2010, Honey was proof that Robyn knows what she's doing when it comes to music. Honey built upon her established booming pop sound and cemented her place in the analogues of pop's most sincere and earnest innovators.

The soft, sensual, and luscious production of Honey was a sharp contrast to Body Talk's hard hitting beats, but serves the album well by building on Robyn's typically pounding sound and reforming it to feel intimate and safe. While her past work encouraged the listener to boldly step into the world with conviction, Honey encourages the listener to look inward and reflect. The album serves as Robyn's invitation to a new kind of dancefloor- one which encourages intimacy and contemplation through its soundtrack.

The album starts off with Missing U, where Robyn's fleeting thoughts and observations on absence express sincere longing for a former partner. Though the song is upbeat in its instrumentation, Robyn's hushed vocals and melancholic candor bring a sense of pained anguish and longing- making for a nuanced and intriguing opening track. She holds the listeners attention throughout the next 2 songs, Human Being (featuring Zhala) and Because it's In the Music, which match her contemplative musings on past romances but introduce a more forlorn and expanded production.

The sweeping height of the album comes in the next three songs; Baby Forgive Me, Send to Robin Immediately, and Honey. Beginning with Baby Forgive Me, Robyn establishes a quiet and personal tone with the listener. In a hushed voice, she delivers a frank statement on the challenges of intimacy following a breakup by pleading with her partner to give it "just one more try." Robyn's pleas are seemingly met with speculation (and potentially apathy), causing her to demand emotional vulnerability on her next song, Send to Robin Immediately. Characterized by a spacious and complex production, Send to Robin Immediately is a stark and honest series of requests by Robyn for us all to embrace emotional vulnerability by revealing our feelings of desire. The lofty ideals of the song's lyrics are matched by Robyn's serene vocal delivery, which conveys a sense of urgency through her gracefully delivered proclamations. Following her pleas for vulnerability, Robyn creates a dancefloor breakthrough on Honey, a song which entices the listener to give into the sweetness of the sound and simply enjoy the feeling of the music. Honey is a slight return to the pop tones of Body Talk, but builds upon Robyn's past sound by adding a feeling of peace in place of euphoria. Honey shows a more mature Robyn crafting a dancefloor track which allows her listeners to enjoy her hard-fought realizations about intimacy.

Following Honey, Robyn delivers three more songs which end the album on an upbeat and satisfying note. Between the Lines, Beach2k20, and Ever Again round out Robyn's prior musings on intimacy and vulnerability by noting how relationships can be messy, complex, and confusing but also relaxed, easy, fun, or even silly. The strongest of these last three songs, Ever Again, ends the album on a note of finality, with Robyn boldly declaring "I swear I'm never gonna be brokenhearted ever again." There's no abject mentions of pain, torture, or heartbreak in the wake of a ruined relationship on Ever Again. Instead, Robyn bypasses these typical tropes altogether in favor of simply expressing a resolution to never feel heartbreak again, and leaves it to the listener to construct their own ideas of what that means, creating a more personal and intimate nature to the song.

At its most basic level, Honey is simply a beautiful album by one of pop music's most criminally underrated innovators. On Honey, Robyn once again devotes her musical talents to developing an engaging set of songs which encourage the listener to abandon their inhibitions and devote themselves to emotional development. Honey stands out in Robyn's discography by pushing her sound to new heights. On Honey, Robyn fully encourages the listener to embrace the dancefloor in a new way, pushing the sounds of pop to new places and paving the way for more sincere and intriguing pop music to take center stage.

[popculty]

52 Films by Women: 2020 Edition

Another annual challenge complete!

Last year, I focused on diversifying my list. This year I kept that intention but focused on watching more non-American films and films from the 20th century. Specifically, I sought out Agnès Varda’s entire filmography, after her death in 2019. (I was not disappointed - What a filmmaking legend we lost.) 

I also kept a film log for the first time and have included some of my thoughts on several films from that log. I made a point of including reviews both positive and negative, because I think it’s important to acknowledge the variability and breadth of the canon, so as not to put every film directed by a woman on a pedestal. (Although movies directed by women must clear a much higher bar to be greenlit, meaning generally higher quality...But that’s an essay for another day :)

* = directed by a woman of color

bold = fave

1. The Rhythm Section (2020) dir. Reed Morano - Not as good as it could have been, given Morano’s proven skill behind the camera, but also not nearly as bad as the critics made it out to be. And unbelievably refreshing to see a female revenge story not driven by sexual assault or the loss of a husband/child.

2. Cléo de 5 à 7 (1962) dir. Agnès Varda - If you ever wanted to take a real-time tour of Paris circa 1960, this is the film for you.

3. Little Women (2019) dir. Greta Gerwig - Still my favorite Little Women adaptation. I will re-watch it every year and cry.

4. Varda by Agnès (2019) dir. Agnès Varda & Didier Rouget

5. Booksmart (2019) dir. Olivia Wilde - An instant classic high school comedy romp that subverts all the gross tropes of its 1980s predecessors.

6. Girls of the Sun (2018) dir. Eva Husson

7. Blue My Mind (2017) dir. Lisa Brühlmann

8. Portrait of a Lady On Fire (2019) dir. Céline Sciamma - Believe the hype. This film is a master thesis on the female gaze, and also just really effing gorgeous.

9. Belle Epine (2010) dir. Rebecca Zlotowski

10. Vamps (2012) dir. Amy Heckerling - With Krysten Ritter and Alicia Silverstone as modern-day vampires, I was so ready for this movie. But it feels like a bad stage play or a sit-com that’s missing a laugh-track. Bummer.

11. *Birds of Prey (2020) dir. Cathy Yan - Where has this movie been all our lives?? Skip the next onslaught of Snyder-verse grim-darkery and give me two more of these STAT! 

12. She’s Missing (2019) dir. Alexandra McGuinness

13. The Mustang (2019) dir. Laure de Clermont-Tonnere - Trigger warning for the “protagonist” repeatedly punching a horse in the chest. I noped right out of there.

14. Monster (2003) dir. Patty Jenkins – I first watched this movie when I was probably too young and haven’t revisited it since. The rape scene traumatized me as a kid, but as an adult I appreciate how that trauma is not the center of the movie, or even of Aileen’s life. Everyone still talks about how Charlize “went ugly” for this role, but the biggest transformation here isn’t aesthetic, it’s physical – the way Theron replicates Wuernos’ mannerisms, way of speaking, and physicality. That’s why she won the Oscar. I also love that Jenkins calls the film “Monster” (which everyone labels Aileen), but then actually uses it to tell the story of how she fell in love with a woman when she was at her lowest, and that saved her. That’s kind of beautiful, and I’m glad I re-watched it so that I could see the story in that light, instead of the general memory I had of it being a good, feel-bad movie. It’s so much more than that.

15. Water Lilies (2007) dir. Céline Sciamma – Sciamma’s screenwriting and directorial debut, the first in her trilogy on youth, is as painfully beautiful as its sequels (Tomboy and Girlhood). It’s also one of the rare films that explores the overlap of queerness and girl friendships.

16. The Trouble with Angels (1966) dir. Ida Lupino – Movies about shenanigan-based female friendships are such rare delights. Rosalind Russel is divine as Mother Superior, and Hayley Mills as “scathingly brilliant” as the pranks she plays on her. Ida Lupino’s skill as an editor only enhances her directing, providing some truly iconic visual gags to complement dialogue snappy enough for Gilmore Girls. 

17. Vagabond (1985) dir. Agnès Varda – Shot with a haunting realism, this film has no qualms about its heroine’s inevitable, unceremonious death, which it opens with, matter-of-factly, before retracing her final (literal) steps to the road-side ditch she ends up in. (I’m partly convinced said heroine was the inspiration for Sarah Manning in Orphan Black.)

18. One Sings, The Other Doesn’t (1977) dir. Agnès Varda – Probably my favorite classic Varda, this film feels incredibly personal. It’s essentially a love story about two best friends with very different lives. For an indie made in the ‘70s, the diversity, scope, and themes of the film are impressive. Even if the second half a drags a bit, the first half is absolute perfection, engaging the viewer immediately, and clipping along, sprinkling in some great original songs that were way progressive for their time (about abortion, female bodily autonomy, etc) and could still be considered “bangers” today.

19. Emma (2020) dir. Autumn de Wilde

20. Black Panthers (1969) dir. Agnès Varda

21. Into the Forest (2016) dir. Patricia Rozema - When the world was ending (i.e. the pandemic hit) this was the first movie I turned to - a quiet, meditative story of two sisters (Elliot Page and Evan Rachel Wood) surviving off the land after a sudden global blackout. Four years later, it’s still one of my favorite book-to-screen adaptations. I fondly remember speaking with director Patricia Rozema at the 2016 Chicago Critics Film Festival after a screening, her love for the source material and desire to “get it right” so apparent. I assured her then, and reaffirm now, that she really did.

22. City of Trees (2019) dir. Alexandra Swarens

23. Never Rarely Sometimes Always (2020) dir. Eliza Hittmann - To call this a harrowing and deeply personal journey of a sixteen-year-old who must cross state lines to get an abortion would be accurate, but incomplete. It is a story so much bigger than that, about the myriad ways women’s bodies and boundaries are constantly violated.

24. Paradise Hills (2019) dir. Alice Waddington

25. *Eve’s Bayou (1996) dir. Kasi Lemmons – I’ve been meaning to watch Kasi Lemmons’ directorial debut for many years now, and I’m so glad I finally have, because it fully deserves its icon status, beyond being one of the first major films directed by a black woman. Baby Jurnee Smollett's talent was immediately recognizable, and she has reminded us of it in Birds of Prey and Lovecraft Country this year. If merit was genuinely a factor for Oscar contenders, she would have taken home gold at eleven years old. Beasts of the Southern Wild has been one of my all-time favorites, but now I realize that most of my appreciation for that movie actually goes to Lemmons for blazing the trail with her story of a young black girl from the bayou first. It’s also a surprisingly dark story about memory and abuse and familial relationships that cross lines - really gutsy and surprising themes, especially for the ‘90s.

26. Blow the Man Down (2019) dir. Bridget Savage Cole & Danielle Krudy - Come and get your sea shanty fix!

27. Touchy Feely (2013) dir. Lynn Shelton - R.I.P. :(

28. Hannah Gadsby: Douglas (2020) dir. Madeleine Parry - If you thought Gadsby couldn’t follow up 2018′s sensational Nanette with a comedy special just as sharp and hilarious, you would have been sorely mistaken.

29. Girlhood (2013) dir. Céline Sciamma

30. Breathe (2014) dir. Mélanie Laurent

31. *A Dry White Season (1989) dir. Euzhan Palcy

32. Laggies (2014) dir. Lynn Shelton

33. *The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince-Bythewood – Everything I’ve ever wanted in an action movie: Immortal gays, Charlize Theron wielding a labrys (battle axe), kinetic fight choreography I haven’t seen since the last Bond movie…Watched it twice, then devoured the comics it was adapted from, and I gotta say: in the hands of black women, it eclipses the source material. Cannot wait for the just-announced sequel.

34. Morvern Callar (2002) dir. Lynn Ramsay

35. Shirley (2020) dir. Josephine Decker

36. *Radioactive (2019) dir. Marjane Satrapi – The story is obviously well worth telling and the narrative structure – weaving in the future consequences of Curie’s discoveries – is clever, but a bit awkwardly executed and overly manipulative. There are glimpses of real brilliance throughout, but it feels as if the director’s vision was not fully realized, to my great disappointment. Nonetheless, I appreciated seeing Marie Curie's story being told by a female director and embodied by the always wonderful Rosamund Pike.

37. *The Half of It (2020) dir. Alice Wu - I feel like a real scrooge for saying this, but this movie did nothing for me. Nothing about it felt fresh, authentic or relatable. A real disappointment from the filmmaker behind the wlw classic Saving Face.

38. Mouthpiece (2018) dir. Patricia Rozema - I am absolutely floored. One of those films that makes you fall in love with the art form all over again. Patricia Rozema continues to prove herself one of the most creatively ambitious and insightful directors of our time, with this melancholic meditation on maternal grief and a woman’s duality.

39. Summerland (2020) dir. Jessica Swale - The rare period wlw love story that is not a) all-white or b) tragedy porn. Just lovely.

40. *The Last Thing He Wanted (2020) dir. Dee Rees – As rumored, a mess. Even by the end, I still couldn’t tell you who any of the characters are. Dee, we know you’re so much better than this! (see: Mudbound, Pariah)

41. *Cuties (2020) dir. Maïmouna Doucouré – I watched this film to 1) support a black woman director who has been getting death threats for her work and 2) see what all the fuss is about. While I do think there were possibly some directorial choices that could have saved quite a bit of the pearl-clutching, overall, I didn’t find it overly-exploitative or gross, as many (who obviously haven’t actually watched the film) have labeled it. It certainly does give me pause, though, and makes me wonder whether children can ever be put in front of a camera without it exploiting or causing harm to them in some way. It also makes one consider the blurry line between being a critique versus being an example. File this one under complicated, for sure.

42. A Call to Spy (2019) Lydia Dean Pilcher – An incredible true story of female spies during WWII that perfectly satisfied my itch for British period drama/spy thriller and taught me so much herstory I didn’t know.

43. Kajillionaire (2020) dir. Miranda July - I was lucky enough to attend the (virtual) premiere of this film, followed by an insightful cast/director Q&A, which only made me appreciate it more. July's offbeat dark comedy about a family of con artists is queerer and more heartfelt than it has any right to be, and a needed reprieve in a year of almost entirely white wlw stories. The family's shenanigans are the hook, but it's the budding relationship between Old Dolio (an almost unrecognizable Evan Rachel Wood) and aspiring grifter Melanie (the luminous Gina Rodriguez) that is the heart of the story.

44. Misbehaviour (2020) dir. Philippa Lowthorpe – Again, teaching me herstory I didn’t know, about how the Women’s Liberation Movement stormed the 1970 Miss World Pageant. Keira Knightley and Gugu Mbatha-Raw’s characters have a conversation in a bathroom at the end of the film that perfectly eviscerates well-meaning yet ignorant white feminism, without ever pitting women against each other - a feat I didn’t think was possible. I also didn’t think it was possible to critique the male gaze without showing it (*ahem Cuties, Bombshell, etc*), but this again, invents a way to do it. Bless women directors.

45. *All In: The Fight for Democracy (2020) dir. Liz Garbus and Lisa Cortes – 2020’s 13th. Thank god for Stacey Abrams, that is all.

46. *The 40-Year-Old Version (2020) dir. Radha Blank – This scene right here? I felt that in my soul. This whole film is so good and funny and heartfelt and relatable to any artist trying to walk that tightrope of “making it” while not selling their soul to make it. My only initial semi-note was that it’s a little long, but after hearing Radha Blank talk about how she fought for the two-hour run-time as a way of reclaiming space for older black women, I take it back. She’s right: Let black women take up space. Let her movie be as long as she wants it to be. GOOD FOR HER.

47. Happiest Season (2020) dir. Clea Duvall - Hoooo boy. What was marketed as the first lesbian Christmas rom-com is actually a horror movie for anyone who’s ever had to come out. Throw in casual racism and a toxic relationship treated as otp, and it’s YIKES on so many levels. Aubrey Plaza, Dan Levy, and an autistic-coded Jane are the only (underused) highlights.

48. *Monkey Beach (2020) dir. Loretta Todd

49. *Little Chief (2020) dir. Erica Tremblay – A short film part of the 2020 Red Nation Film Festival, it’s a perfect eleven minutes that I wish had gone on longer, if only to bask in Lily Gladstone in a leading role.

50. First Cow (2019) dir. Kelly Reichardt – I know Kelly Reichardt’s style, so I’ll admit-- even as I was preparing for an excellent film, I was also reaching for my phone, planning on only half paying attention during all the inevitable 30-second shots of grass blowing in the wind. (And yes, there are plenty of those.) But twenty minutes in, my phone was set aside and forgotten, as I am getting sucked into this beautiful story about two frontiersman trying to live their best domestic life.There is only one word to describe this film and that is: PURE. I’ve never seen such a tender platonic relationship between men on screen before, and it’s not lost on me that it took a woman to show us that tenderness. Reichardt gives us two men brought together by fate, and kept together by a shared dream and the simple pleasure of not being alone in such a hard world; two men who spend their days cooking, trapping, baking, and dreaming of a better life; two men who don’t say much, but feel everything for each other. The world would be a much better place if men showed us this kind of vulnerability and friendship toward each other. Oh, and it’s also a brutal take-down of capitalism and the myth of the American Dream!

51. Wonder Woman 1984 (2020) dir. Patty Jenkins - My most-anticipated film for the past two years was...well, a mixed bag, to say the least. Too many thoughts on it for a blog post, so stay tuned for the upcoming podcast ep where we go all in ;)

52. *Selah and the Spades (2019) dir. Tayarisha Poe

I hope this gives you some ideas to kick off your new year with a resolution to support more female directors!

What were your favorite women-directed movies of last year? Let me know in the tags, comments, or asks!

[tealsapphire]

The irony is not lost on me.

On the contrary, I spent the whole day being so conscious, or brooding, about it (even in the middle of day-long mid year review, induction training AND customer meeting, yes) I can finally come into one sound, proud conclusion : I've finally moved on past J.

This is J we are talking about. The man who contributed to the worst heartbreak I've ever had in my 33 years living on planet #3.

All of my past indie playlist consisting of melancholic, angsty songs that was kind of dedicated for him, or the memory of our relationship. Heck, my past Tumblr account consisted of emotional, dark and lonely posts that was meant for him (if I actually had any guts to tell those words)

10 years I spent avoiding any means of communicating with him.

That was easy at first. He moved 8,509 kilometres away (this is a fact) and got settled in immediately with a nice lady (now this is assumptive because I've never really found out in detail how his life post-me was, it was too painful and also embarrassing to stalk your ex) but one thing I know, they got married (and still are).

So he moved on smoothly. While I was pretty much stuck in my 4rd year of med school, staying in that city for another 2 year feeling miserable, lonely and freaking in pain.

I used to laugh when people said that heartbreak felt like someone physically rip your heart out of your chest. And oh man, I experienced that pain.

After a while the pain kinda subsided and I decided that in no fucking hell I'd want to experience that again. I blocked him everywhere. Email (marked as spam), phone number (easy, I don't really have his number and pretty sure he won't reach out to me first), social media accounts (kids this was in 2010 so we only had FB, Skype, and Flickr at that time but hell yes I blocked him on all of those)

Harsh, and yes it hurt but hearing from him again (when he's not mine)... The idea fucking hurts.

I spent the next few years still being sore everytime his name was mentioned, going for relationship with guys when my heart clearly wanted him only, and getting haunted by his shadows in my dreams.

He found me in 2016 in a social media platform through a mutual friend and we reconnected briefly.

Big mistake. I got heartbroken still after 6 years. He was still as charming and polite as ever, saying that he missed me (as a friend of course, but goddamn it my heart just couldn't take the pain).

So I did what I do best, I blocked him and asking our mutual friend to never give any of my information to him ever again.

Life was pretty quiet after that.

Then came 2020. Freaking stubborn dude found me on LinkedIn (of all places to look for your ex, am I right) and we reconnected again.

This time, I took the liberty to laid it all out: save me all the crap of missing me, and let's know each other all over again as friends.

Never really got any confirmation from him but his approach definitely got more muted than years before. We started to talk about mundane stuffs: my 9-5 job and his clinic, general situation between our countries, and generally about families. I draw a line about details of his personal life; honestly I don't want to know and although it doesn't hurt anymore, I decided that I don't want to be having a fake smile about it and cry afterwards later on during emotional meltdown.

He complied so far, and at least he never really brought up anything from our time together in the past. That shit still hurts.

But to have him back in my life, albeit fleetingly, is something I wouldn't dare to think about even 5 years ago.

We talk from time to time, one short conversation every month or even less frequently.

And just that, this morning in mid July 2021 I woke up at 6pm (midnight in Germany) with a photo of him raising a glass of whisky.

That damned smile plastered on his handsome face used to make my heart flutter like a high school girl, but this morning I woke up looking at that photo just feeling indifferent.

We had a 15 mins worth of texting and for the very first time in 11 years, it felt just like texting my work colleague about next presentation module: unattached and honestly-i-don't-give-a-damn-about-you.

Now at 10pm, I look back to the picture he sent me this morning and finally, finally, I can look at that face with no feelings anymore.

If this is the feeling of finally moving on, I'm loving it.

Yes the always-melodramatic part of me always wishes that the moment would come like those epiphanic scenes in House MD, but no.

And I'm totally fine with it.

[betweenthetimeandsound]

Three Minutes to Eternity: My ESC 250 (250-241)

(Author's note: I intended to have the list ready by 1 September, but I was a bit lousy in compiling the final spots on there. As a result, they will seem a bit shoddy, but there will be good summaries, I promise! And there will be honorable mentions soon enough.)

#250: Harel Skaat -- Milim (Israel 2010)

“האור נרדם, דמעות של דם, שורפות לי בגרון, ידית שרוטה, תקרה שמוטה, כשאני שר לך את השיר האחרון” “The light fell asleep, tears of blood scorch my throat Scratched handle, sloping ceiling When I sing to you the last song” Curiously, I already knew of Harel Skaat before hearing of Eurovision: I listened to a few of his earlier tracks when I found him singing with another Israeli pop artist, Dor Daniel. I particularly liked משנו ממני and כמה עוד אפשר. Milim is a requiem for what was once lost—the presence of one whom the narrator really loves. The imagery used in this song adds to the melancholic feel—a classic ballad of sorts, with a lot of emotion. And the performance from Harel was very good, even though he butchered a note at the end. Maybe it was the pretty blue lights that really accompanied the mood of the song. Personal ranking: 7th/39 Actual ranking: 14th/25 GF (grand final) in Oslo

#249: Tina Karol -- Show Me Your Love (Ukraine 2006)

"You see it in my eyes, my heart is on fire Don’t hide your love away, don’t wait another day" As mentioned in the note, I had a hard time determining the last few spots on my list. I went through the results of both sorters and picked what I felt in the time. Show Me Your Love is a bit odd, but with the accordion intro striking right away, it deserves a place here! While an overly simple song with stilted lyrics, Show Me Your Love is still a bunch of fun. From the boppy beat to Tina's infectious presence on stage, one can't help but smile as this comes along. And there was a jump rope right in the middle of the performance--never change, Ukraine. :) Personal ranking: 5th/37 Actual ranking: 7th/24 GF in Athens

#248: Alan Sorrenti -- Non so che darei (Italy 1980)

“Non so che darei per fermare il tempo Per dormire al tuo fianco solo una notte Non so che darei per sentirti mia Per tenerti vicina solo una notte” “I don’t know what I can give to stop the time To sleep beside you only for one night I don’t know what I can give To take you close to me only for one night” Recently, I find myself humming to this a lot, because it's so calming and nice. I particularly like Alan’s vocals in this song! He really conveys the pain of losing (or on the verge of losing) the one he loves, expressed by the melancholic lyrics. Together, they form a song which is just as beautiful, if not more so than the winner of its year. Despite its 6th place, it became a continent-wide hit, which was quite deserved (just like a good number of Italian Eurovision songs over the years, haha)! Alongside that, Non so che darei also had the only black conductor at Eurovision while there was an orchestra, along with a couple of women playing fake guitars. For some reason, I imagined they were holding umbrellas instead, but I clearly remembered wrong... Personal ranking: 3rd/19 Actual ranking: 6th/19 in Den Haag

#247: Sanja Vucic ZAA -- Goodbye (Shelter) (Serbia 2016)

"I lick my wounds So that I can keep on fighting" Another last-minute choice, but this is an important song, both in 2016 and now, unfortunately. Despite the advances in women's rights over the decades, domestic violence still persists across the world. Goodbye (Shelter) tells the story through someone who's struggling to get out of a toxic relationship, and there's a mix of vulnerability and strength in the lyrics. Of course, lyrics don't make up the whole song; the music also conveys the story through a dramatic build and beautiful strings. Considering the 2016 contest, it does get a bit lost amongst the crowd, but it feels like a musical number in all the right ways. Also, the performance told the story well, and Sanja is a wonderful singer (she also sings a cover of one all-time favorite you will see towards the end, hehe). I even would shed a tear at points. Personal ranking: 8th/42 Actual ranking: 18th/26 GF in Stockholm

#246: Remedios Amaya--Quien Maneja Mi Barca? (Spain 1983)

“El verde de tus ojos verdes, mírame, Que mira que yo te mire, mírame, Que mira que yo te mire” “The green of your green eyes, look at me, Look at me, so I can look at you, look at me Look at me, so I can look at you” One of those songs that can be defined as an acquired taste--the people who love it enjoy its subversive status in the Eurovision canon for being unapologetically Spanish, while the people who hate it will dismiss it as just a bunch of noise. This is a song which is part of the “New Flamenco” genre popularized since the 1960s, which mixes up flamenco music with other genres, such as rock or electronic music. Quien Maneja mi Barca ‘s studio cut has nebulous lyrics combined with an electronic beat, which is alright at best. I found it quite hollow and quite forgettable there. I prefer it in its orchestral form, which fuses synths and concert instruments fantastically. It definitely amps up the drama with Remedios’ voice, and made me appreciate this very distinct entry. Personal ranking: 6th/20 Actual ranking: Joint last (with Turkey) in Munich

#245: Marianna Efstratiou - To diko sou asteri (Greece 1989)

"Μα στο βραδινό τον ουρανό το δικό σου αστέρι ψάξε βρες Γιατί οι σκιές στο πρώτο φως μοιάζουνε φοβίες παιδικές" "But in the evening sky, search and find your own star Because the shadows in the first light seem to be childish phobias" While To diko sou asteri sounds a bit safe in the grand scheme of things, I think its lack of pretension is what makes this little song shine. The lyrics encourage one to find their star and encourage the listener to pursue what they believe in without any fear. Marianna's vocals also add to this song in that they're quietly hopeful and sweet. Also, for some reason, I got some "True Colors" vibes while listening to it every time, despite there being some differences. Both have this relaxing, calm vibe to help the listener on their journey through life. Then again, True Colors doesn't have some nice flute flourishes throughout the song, haha. Personal ranking: 4th/22 Actual ranking: 9th/22 at Lausanne

#244: Dina -- Amor d'agua fresca (Portugal 1992)

"Peguei, trinquei e meti-te na cesta Ris e dás-me a volta à cabeça" "I picked you, bit into you and put you in the basket You laughed and made my head spin" 1992 is one of the most average years at Eurovision--after the chaos that was 1991, it seems like the songs and production sought something safer, and the whole thing felt really bland. Amor d'agua fresca is anything but dull--it's bubbly and sweet, with quite relaxed atmosphere. The combination of instruments--particular the guitar in the beginning and Dina's vocals-- really help with conveying a mood. But after that, we have the lustful lyrics, describing a romance through enjoying different fruits, which was quite different for me... But hey, different makes things quite a bit better in life! Personal ranking: 4th/23 Actual ranking: 17th/23 in Malmo

#243: Lucia -- Él (Spain 1982)

"Él me perdona porque es un pedazo de buen pan Y me trata con paciencia Sé que no debo ser cruel Que le debo confesar que él a mí, no me interesa" "He forgives me because he’s a scrap of good bread And he treats me with patience I know that I shouldn’t be cruel That I should tell him I’m not interested in him" One interesting thing about me is that I'm a sucker for tango music. There's a sense of drama when one listens to it, and even more so when people get on the dance floor. While I've only danced it a few times, when one does it right, the connection between two people is quite powerful, and you could fall right into a dream. El definitely amps up the drama--Lucia is in a conflicted relationship, but she plays the "player" role quite well. It's very flirty and seductive, and you could immerse yourself in the story. While the dancing was a bit too much for a stage as small as 1982's, it's still quite fun to see. Also, it was sent as a way of supporting Argentina in the Falkland Wars, which is quite interesting... Personal ranking: 4th/18 Actual ranking: 10th/18 in Harrogate

#242: Gabriela Gunčíková -- I Stand (Czech Republic 2016)

"I am thanking you, you made me You are my air, I’ll always care" For those who have an aversion to ballads, why is that? I find it annoying because there can be ones where they can touch you and tell a story. Life can't always be happy bops with heavy beats (or it's because they don't really inhabit my musical atmosphere most of the time...) I Stand sounds like a derivative ballad sonically, but it carries itself with such grace and grandeur. The instruments add to the drama of the song, which thanks a special person for their help in their life (though the lyrics above can come off as a bit co-dependent...or so I've heard) And Gabriela delivers this with the necessary composure and grace the song desires. It feels like a highlight track from a musical--one where two characters meet again and the narrator wants to recognize the latter's good deeds before they're gone forever. Thanks to that, the Czech Republic gets their first grand final appearance (though getting 0 televote points once there was harsh...) Personal ranking: 7th/42 Actual ranking: 25th/26 GF in Stockholm

#241: t.A.T.u -- Ne ver, ne boysia (Russia 2003)

“Кто-то понты а кто-то маньяк, Кто-то как ты, кто-то как я.” “Someone's a psycho and someone's a maniac, Someone like you, someone like me” If I’m right, I may have heard this song without knowing this was from Eurovision. It was because there was a period between middle school and high school where I love t.A.T.u’s music, and this was one of their singles. Ne Ver Ne Bosia is compelling and dark, with an interplay about the people around them using an old Soviet proverb as the title. It’s gripping and intense, and brings the listener into this crazy and mad world they're enveloped in. The performance, on the other hand, almost couldn't have been worse. The vocals were really ropey (especially from Lena, who would usually be trusted to help Yulia), and it didn't come over as a great listening experience. While I love it, t.A.T.u were really lucky they competed in the televote era, as they would've been struck down hard by the juries. (and the worst part: there will be a couple of poorly-performed entries which will be quite high on this list...) Personal ranking: 6th/26 Actual ranking: 3rd/26 in Riga

[clickyourradio]

Helsinki, Aug 19, 2021. '1993' is the third and final single from Forth’s upcoming third album. The song is a very personal return to the past for the band. The lyrics are a reflection on feelings of loss after the untimely passing of so many influential artists from the 1990’s like Chris Cornell, Kurt Cobain, Layne Staley, Chester Bennington and so many more. The story and the accompanying video show a hopeful passing the musical torch between generations. In it, lead singer and lyricist, Brian Forth remembers thefirst guitar given to him by his first love when he was a young teenager. He remembers being awakened musically by the raw, emotional power of the sounds of Seattle rock and learning to play along on his old 6 string. Decades later he finds the guitar packed away and coated in dust and he gives it forward to his young son, in hopes of hearing “one last song”. The song is heavy, melodic and melancholic with a chorus that lingers on the mind long after the first listen.

Formed in 2010, Forth delivers hard rock and grunge with melodic sensibilities. Canadian lead singer/songwriter Brian Forth fronts the band joined by Finnish rockers Tim Norrgrann (lead guitar), Kari Storckovius (drums) and Mikael Söderbäck (bass). Their first album, "Road Stories" debuted in 2014 and brought success with the first single 'Up Up Away' climbing to number 2 on the Finnish iTunes rock charts. The second single, 'Fairytale Princess' lasted a month in the top 5 of YLE Toppen charts. After signing with Secret Entertainment, Forth released sophmore album "Captivity" in March 2019. "Captivity" achieved even more success, winning accolades from critics of the genre all over the world. Three different tracks, went straight to the top of indie charts in Finland, US, Spain and Canada, including #1 for 'Higher Ground' on the UK Radio Indie Alliance. "Captivity" put Forth on rotation on YLE radio in Finland ('Let Me In') and also on others in the US, Canada and Spain with different tracks from the album.

Forth single '1993' will be released on August 19, 2021. It is the last of 3 singles scheduled ahead of their upcoming third studio album in September 2021.

[hhuta]

(3D lbqfm anon) y'know after reading ur post on it i realized i a) subconsciously noticed the de-gaying and that's probably why i didn't like it and b) somehow didn't notice ANY changes despite the fact that I watched the two versions less than a week apart,,, i thought it was just the new cravat (tho i still don't like it. the old one was better) | also,,,, is it too much trouble to ask why u don't like the 3D assassymphonie? guessing smtg to do w the women | also ur opinion on 3D vaec?

where do i start with miss l'assasymphonie.. btw u can watch the video of the two versions side by side here. and my rant got wayyy too long so ill talk about VAEC in another post ldkjasl

tw: self harm/suicide mention just to be safe

im going to start with minor differences that make me prefer the 2010 version but not hate the 2011 one

first of all his dramatic soft gay sappy ass touching his heart when talking about mozarts music i like that a lot :(

then when he sings "killing out of spite everything i create" he metaphorically stabs himself in 2010 but not in 2011

and i love the first version because its a nice and subtle parallel between how mozarts music makes him feel like (lbqfm) vs how his own music affects him (l'assasymphonie) as i pointed out here before. this is on different levels !! the fact that in lbqfm its his inner gay demon stabbing him, representing mozart(s music) and in l'assasymphonie he stabs himself..... bc he is killing what he creates and what he creates is part of himself... so this isnt about him wanting to kill mozart its about him being self destructive... this is crazy this is just one gesture and i can go on and on about it and honestly my rant will only get more insane.

later he grabs the knife at different moments and in different ways and i think the 2010 version is more dramatic and impactful. the editing helps too, it really made me jump, its all done at the right time. but honestly both are valid to me; i feel like in 2010 hes more angry and impulsive, like its the very first time he thinks about doing something like this, whereas in 2011 he feels sad and defeated, like hes going back to a place he fought very hard to get out of and because of this one guy hes back there, but in the end he recognises its his own fault

another minor difference that i think is worth mentioning, and honestly i like both versions, is what he does at the "senseless (or crazy) symphony" part. in 2010 he almost covers his ears cuz obviously it goes along with the lyrics in a literal sense. meanwhile in 2011 its more of a symbolic interpretation? idk how to word it but 2010 feels like hes just talking about his music and the thoughts inside his head making no sense, but in 2011 when he looks at his writs, his veins, its like he is talking about himself as a whole; a being without any meaning, who is losing his mind, and i like that too

and this difference goes on when he talks about the "disconcerting concert"; 2010 feels like hes literally listening to it around him, his performance in 2010 is overall more dramatic lkjslkd, meanwhile theres none of that in 2011, hes too melancholic to be jumping around

here when hes talking about his talent (or rather lack of) u can see how hes more angry in 2010 and sad in 2011 (honestly this corroborates my theory that at the beginning florent played salieri as a legit evil villain but as it went on he added more depth)

anyways so far both versions are good to me now........ the fucking dancers............... i move away from the mic to breathe in.jpg

theres just. so fucking much going on in 2011. there are a shit ton of people moving around, the flashing lights, the constant zoom in and out, the curtains moving the background, im gonna have a stroke????? l'assasymphonie is such a heavy song, emotionally, and florents performance is amazing on its on theres no fucking need to add 100 more elements!??!? it totally takes away ur focus from salieri ....

my biggest problem is with the dancers as u guessed it cuz honestly idk why they are there, i dont understand the need. i get that they are his inner demons, but not the sexy ones, so they are there to represent his inner turmoil and add a chaos element to the performance and a parallel to lbqfm with the whole hands on salieri part, but its way to obvious that it becomes repetitive! inner demons dancing around a character happens way too much on mor; bim bam boum in a way, j'accuse mon pere, la mascarade, comedie-tragedie, si je defaille, lbqfm and now again?!!?!?!?! bitihc dlajsdlkas

and the worst fucking part to me is when salieri goes to kill the female dancer

.....why whY... WHY.. why make the song literal like this!!! this is not what its about??!?! i know she isnt supposed to be A Person, this isnt him being A Murderer, she is him in a way but ?? we already saw him almost killing himself??!!? why repeat that, this is just so unnecessary and it doesnt sit right with me why make him stab a woman!! it makes my blood boil. it takes away all the drama from the other scene, of him with the knife on his wrist, because it is essentially the same!

now lets discuss why i prefer the lost half naked blindfolded men. is it because its gay? yes. is it because of the kinky element? yes. u see how that creates a parallel to lbqfm but in a subtle way? yes thank you.

to elaborate i feel like the 2010 dancers represent his psyche at the moment soooo much better. its not just simply his inner demons haunting him again, making it repetitive.

his is how i interpret it and how it relates to salieri:

the blindfold: god it can mean so much... above all i think its his envy and anger blinding him, making him feel lost and afraid. but it can also represent how salieri is a stern man, he only sees things one way and is blinded to other possibilities, other ways of living. because he is so narrow minded, so used to just following the status quo, he doesnt understand mozart and how his carefree way of life is working for him. he doesnt understand his conflicted feelings towards mozart. he doesnt understand how mozarts music can be so unconventional and yet beautiful, etc etc. his world was shattered and he feels lost because of this one little guy

but honestly i think the intention was to give a shoutout to amadeus lmao which is still cool. they do mention in MOR that mozart can play blindfolded so u can view as a parallel to that too

the lack of clothes: around mozart salieri feels naked but not in a sexy and fun way, in vulnerable and seen for the first time way. imagine how strongly he considered changing his name and moving countries after the whole eh bien, maestro? trop de notes? ordeal..... he was caught off guard in that situation so he let the truth out way too much, but he knows he cant fake it around mozart any other time either

their behaviour: they look afraid, lost, in pain and are constantly falling, getting up, then falling again and being pushed up against the wall by something invisible (to me its mozarts music/influence) and honestly i dont have to say anything else ! its all there !!! it represents salieris emotions perfectly !!!!!

in summary, to me the 2010 dancers dont have a lot to do with the lyrics of the song and i think thats good. they are there to add a new element to it, to let us see inside salieris head, while salieri himself is performing what the lyrics are about. so on the other hand i think the 2011 dancers are repetitive and unnecessary, not adding anything new to the performance

[hyeyuler]

getting to know 브레이브걸스’s discography ★

— songs i’ve listened to so far and my thoughts on them:

“비가 내리면” (2011)

so good! it has elements which make you want to dance, but at the same time the song sounds very sad, very bittersweet i’d say.

“옛생각” (2017)

not going to lie, the beginning sounds like a spotify ad 😭

“i don’t think i’m ready for this shit” so true, i’m not ready either.

personally not my taste, but i really like the pre-chorus, the buildup.

“for you” (2013)

it has this signature sound from the 2010s, it brings me nostalgia i’ve never experienced, tbh.

the second the first note played it had sounded so sad :( 

i really like brave girls’ raps, they embed it into their songs so well, no matter how slow and sad the song may be.

this is definitely going to my cry playlist, imagine it being a rainy day, feeling sad and listening to this. pain

“하이힐” (2016)

FUCK? this is so good. judging by the lyrics, it sounds like a confidence boosting song, i love it!

the RAP i’m fucking obsessed.

i absolutely adore the instrumental, you can hear drums, some rock guitar here and there and the kind of JAZZ after the chorus? perfection.

i’m not a fan of the chorus but it’s very easy to get stuck in your head, i’m already singing along to “high heel, high heel”

“요즘 너” (2012)

the beat i’m once again obsessed.

i love this genre of kpop that went around in the early 2010s, the lyrics being quite melancholic, wanting someone to come back but also having this easily obsessive beat, which makes you jiggle your ass to someone missing their lover, haha

the BRIDGE is once again perfect, what kpop song would be a 2010s song without the severe autotune with crappy english lyrics, safe to say i’m obsessed.

“hands up high” yes queen! *raises my hands*

“rollin” (2017)

i got so excited, i can’t skip this 😭

honestly i’m so happy for brave girls, rising to fame, being able to perform again, gain a following again! after everything they’ve been through, they deserve it and so much more.

the chorus dance is so easy to follow, i make it my job to always dance to it whenever i hear it.

the RAP after the first chorus, ahh i love it so much

and don’t even get me started on the high note? sing it bestie!!!

the buildup to the final chorus after the bridge, it just makes me so happy because of how well sung it is 😭 ahh i love brave girls :(

“whatever” (2016)

not my style, but it’s cunty so i’ll let it slide 🙄

honestly it sounds like a nct song redone for a girl group, but it’s better than anything that group will ever release so.

i imagine myself getting ready to this and feeling good though.

always remember to girlboss, ladies!

“유후 (우린 아직 여름)” (2016)

i! love! upbeat! songs! like! this!

it’s an instant mood boost, i’m already smiling and feeling so much happier!

it gives me island by izone vibes, it just makes me feel good, yk. makes me want to dance and jump around, spread positive energy around. ☀️

i’m so obsessed with brave girls’ bridges, they build up so well, it leaves you anticipating for that final banger chorus <3

this song makes me happy!!! definitely one of my favs out of the ones i’ve listened to so far

“help me” (2016)

another upbeat yet melancholic song! i love this genre so much 😭

bg songs are always so easy to dance to, it makes you want to dance along with no worries or care in the world.

i can’t wait to play this song in the summer late at night while walking around in the park with your friends, it would suit that vibe so much <3

also! this song would fit izone’s jo yuri’s voice so much, i’ll now never shut up about a cover from her 😭

[johannesviii]

Top 12 Personal Favorite Hit Songs from 2014

The “least good” of the three best years of the 2010s. This is still a top 12. Because I can, and I will.

I know. People also call it a bad year. And I think they’re wrong.

Disclaimers:

Keep in mind I’m using both the year-end top 100 lists from the US and from France while making these top 10 things. There’s songs in English that charted in my country way higher than they did in their home countries, or even earlier or later, so that might get surprising at times.

Of course there will be stuff in French. We suck. I know. It’s my list. Deal with it.

My musical tastes have always been terrible and I’m not a critic, just a listener and an idiot.

I have sound to color synesthesia which justifies nothing but might explain why I have trouble describing some songs in other terms than visual ones.

New job, which is the one I still have currently. Also, I discovered Doctor Who in December 2013 and you know exactly what happened in 2014 because I dived head first into the extended universe as soon as I finished New Who and I’ve never really recovered since then. The end of the year was highly stressful, with my cat being sick, my father needing a very dangerous surgical intervention, and me being so stressed out I was basically unable to sleep for days. Might explain why there’s a lot of cute songs on this list, I needed cute stuff.

That year wasn’t very generous in good albums from bands I liked. Epica released The Quantum Enigma, and it was okay, Within Temptation had Hydra, and it was also okay, and Coldplay had the very underrated (in my opinion at least) Ghost Stories, a mostly melancholic album full of bittersweet post-breakup songs. So I’m left with no choice but to declare The Birthday Massacre’s album Superstition my album of the year for 2014. They had stayed at a consistent level since Pins And Needles so I wasn’t expecting anything better from them, but boy do they delivered. Here is Divide, it’s about a subterranean world and it might be a metaphor but as you know I’m very literal-minded! Here’s Beyond, about a lady falling in love with a strange woman who might be some sort of fae or supernatural entity!! I love most of the album and there’s only one subpar song on it. I know they’ll never get a crossover hit but they’d deserve it so much. Look at the state of the world. We’re so ready for a new mainstream wave of energetic, angsty, weird music. Just bring it on.

There’s only one non-elligible song that truely pisses me off this time, and it’s Traffic Girl by Indochine, another single from their Black City Parade album. It’s about a policewoman in North Korea who has to wave and smile at non existant traffic all day long and the song presents her as a modern hero. It’s one of my favorite songs on the album and I’m so mad it didn’t make the French year-end list.

Here’s a list of honorable menti-holy shit why is this list so long

Albatraoz (AronChupa) - Riiiiiight at the limit between catchy and annoying. But it’s blissfully short.

Chandelier (Sia) - I would like this more if it wasn’t that painful to listen to, I swear.

Magic in the Air (Magic System) - Insert my usual comment about these guys and their fun & happy songs.

Un Jour Au Mauvais Endroit (Calogero) - Great music, good lyrics. It’s still Calogero and I tend to dislike how overdramatic he usually is. Not enough to ruin that one song for me though.

Je Garde le Sourire (Black M) - This isn’t the last time he’s gonna appear in this post.

Prayer In C (Lilly Wood & The Prick) - A bit repetitive but in a good way.

Budapest (Georges Ezra) - A bit repetitive but in a good way 2, the return but in a completely different genre.

The Monster (Eminem & Rihanna) - We’ve now entered the songs which I considered putting on the list, and yeah, there’s a lot of them even if this is a top 12. “Bad year for pop music”. Yeah. Right.

Addicted To You (Avicii) - This is good, and the music video is great, and I want to stop feeling emotional about Avicii. Please.

Don’t Tell Em (Jeremih) - I. Uh. What the f█ck. Okay. There’s no way I can justify this. I simply adore this beat even if the lyrics are really, really bad. It’s just visually stunning and I really wish the song itself was better.

Photomaton (Jabberwocky) - I don’t think this would have charted without the success of Kavinsky the previous year. But still. Wonderful stuff. Well deserved.

Madame Pavoshko (Black M) - This was on the first version of the list but in the end I really had no room left for it. It’s a song about a guy telling his old teacher he made it in life despite the fact she labelled him a hopeless case at school. With such a premise, it could be an angry song, but no, it’s upbeat, sarcastic and fun. Wonderful stuff.

Le Graal (Kyo) - Kyo? Wait, you mean the embarrassing emo guys from my 2002 and 2003 lists? These guys?? They were back on the charts after ten years?? And suddenly everyone thought it was cool to like them again?? Including me??? Sounds fake but okay

Turn Down For What (DJ Snake) - The last cut. Stim music at its finest, sharp, aggressive and colorful. Everything I ever wanted from a hit song.

Well, that was long. Here’s the actual list.

12 - Wake Me Up (Avicii)

US: #22 / FR: Not on the list

“So wake me up when it’s all over, when I’m wiser and I’m older” should make no sense. You can’t get wiser if you’re asleep. At least that’s what I would probably say if I didn’t feel this. There’s a lot of times in my life I wished I could be switched off and woken up a couple of years later and be like “hello I’m back, I feel better now, what did I miss”. I totally get it.

The only reason this song is so low on the list is the drop. I don’t like it very much. The rest is damn good.

11 - Boom Clap (Charlie XCX)

US: #34 / FR: #84

Boom! Boom! Boom! CLAP. That song got me after its first seconds. Love its atmosphere, very cotton candy-like, very fluffy, with a sharp voice. Doesn’t work well if you listen to it on a loop, though, and that’s the only negative thing I can say against it.

10 - Stay The Night (Zedd)

US: #94 / FR: Not on the list

This on the other hand works very well on repeat and that drop is golden. I’m afraid I don’t have anything very interesting to say about it. It stayed on my playlist from 2014 to summer 2019, though, so that’s an impressive feat.

9 - Rather Be (Clean Bandit)

US: #41 / FR: #18

Several critics I follow have commented this song is 1) mostly meaningless 2) too perfect to say anything about it and I agree. It’s also too perfect to be really passionate about it, unfortunately, but still, very, very good stuff.

8 - Magic (Coldplay)

US: Not on the list / FR: #66

You already know I don’t really like lowkey emotional songs and I also hate the first act of Coldplay’s career, so why on earth did I like Ghost Stories so much and why is Magic making me feel so emotional, you ask? Well it’s because the music itself isn’t bland. It’s lowkey but rich, dense and colourful, and it works much better than whatever they were doing before with their slow boring songs. Also, I really struggle with dramatic vocal performances on quiet emotional songs (which is why I tend to have issues with Adele’s voice on some of her stuff), and here the balance is just ideal. Soft colors, soft textures, soft voice, this is like a colorful plushie you’ve lost for years and just found in the attic and it brings you to tears. I adore it.

Also the part of the lyrics that goes “And if you were to ask me / After all that we've been through / Still believe in magic? / Oh yes I do”, that makes me want to hug someone and never let go.

7 - Waves (Mr Probz)

US: Not on the list / FR: #15

This is completely hypnotic. It’s perfect to drive, to walk, to draw. to sit on a bench and look at the trees. It’s just wave after wave of pastel colors with a good beat and it washes away your anxiety slowly but surely. Therapeutic and beautiful without ever feeling bland. Wonderful stuff.

6 - Uptown Funk (Bruno Mars & Mark Ronson)

US: Not on the list (#1 on the 2015 year-end list) / FR: #3

Everyone loved it and I wasn’t an exception. You all know it and I’ve got nothing new or interesting to say about it. A ton of fun. Love the lyrics.

5 - Sur Ma Route (Black M)

US: Not on the list / FR: #7

If you’re wondering what’s going on in this picture, the guy is parodying a lot of famous movies or series in the music video. It’s a simple but super energetic song about trying to trace your own road in life and all the problems you encounter and how you can’t always count on people you thought were your friends. It’s very propulsive and motivating and it’s my favorite song from that guy even though he made a lot of good songs. Just great stuff. Check it out if you’ve never heard it.

Speaking of being on your own...

4 - Ain’t It Fun (Paramore)

US: #47 / FR: Not on the list

I miss hearing that kind of thing on the radio and yes, I’m aware that makes me sound like an old idiot. Oh how I wish this had been released in 2010 when I just started to work, that would have been perfect. I know the song is supposed to be sarcastic with the whole “ain’t it fun being on your own” angle, but yeah, when your life wasn’t great before, it’s actually liberating to “live in the real world”, even if it sucks at times, even if it’s difficult and you have responsibilities and all.

Also the music video is super cute. Love it.

3 - Pompeii (Bastille)

US: #12 / FR: Not on the list

I’m honestly surprised this is only #3 on this list considering how much I loved this one back when it came out, and don’t get me wrong, it’s still a song I love to this day, just... a bit less. Maybe it’s because of overplay? I’m not exactly sure considering #1 was also played very often and I never ever got tired of it. And it’s well written, and it’s not every day that you hear a song about two dead people talking about the wrath of the gods after their city was engulfed in ash.

So yeah. Not sure what happened there. I hope this band is eventually gonna have another hit like this one. Bastille, more of Pompeii and less of Happier, please.

2 - Dangerous (David Guetta)

US: Not on the list / FR: #8

A few months ago I heard Memories by Maroon 5 and I was instantly filled with a truely disproportionate amount of rage for such a bland pop song. See, I love it when music uses well-known classical tunes and completely changes their context and tone, but Memories doesn’t do any of that, it’s just the Pachelbel canon with some bad lyrics on top. So yeah, it’s a pet peeve.

Dangerous, on the other hand, is a song mixing a small loop of Toccata & Fugue in D minor and it basically uses it as an ominous pseudo-police siren in a song about illegally cruising a car with your possibly criminal, possibly gangster crush and not knowing if you’re scared, in love or feeling the thrill of adventure, or all of that at once. I. Love this damn song.

When the only bad thing I have to say about a song talking about driving at night way too fast is “eh this isn’t as good as Kavinsky”, you know you’ve found gold.

1 - A Sky Full of Stars (Coldplay & Avicii)

US: #51 / FR: #9

As much as I love Dangerous, there wasn’t any doubt about what would top this list. I’ve spent about ten lists explaining how my appreciation of Coldplay kept growing over time and four lists explaining how much I loved Avicii, and this song is the best of both worlds. The first time I heard it, I was driving and, no joke, I was so overwhelmed I had to park my car to properly concentrate on the song.

One day I will have to paint this song to explain how fantastic it looks and I’d have to use purple, china blue and pink watercolor inks and basically paint a psychedelic night sky full of little lights and yeah, this is basically another of these songs that are deeply satisfying on a synesthetic level, and it joins this very select club with the blue song called “Blue”, the song full of bright flashes called “Lights” and the song that looks like gentle pulsing lights called “Fireflies”. I’m trying (and failing) to learn how to play it on the piano. I know the chords, and I suck, but I’m very determined.

On top of that deeply satisfying visual, there’s the soft vocals so specific of the Ghost Stories album, and the very simple, very cute lyrics, and I simply hear “'Cause you're a sky, 'cause you're a sky full of stars, I'm gonna give you my heart” and I die instantly. This is high quality musical fluff. Come to think of it, this list is full of it, and this is the Ultimate Fluffy Song. One fluff to rule them all.

Sidenote, considering I fell into the DW audios right when this song came out, that’s one of my theme songs for Eight and Charley. Because of course it is.

Next up: The beginning of a progressive drop in quality but you wouldn’t be able to tell considering how long this list of honorable mentions is

[x--daughters-of-darkness--x]

Myrkur: the strange and surreal journey of Amalie Bruun

From hanging out with Martin Scorsese and Billy Corgan to appearing in a Michael Bolton video, Myrkur's Amalie Bruun is a black metal star like no other

An old painting hangs on the wall of the compact, one-storey house an hour’s drive out of Copenhagen that Amalie Bruun calls home. It depicts a blonde girl lost in reverie as she walks a grass path high above a fjord: a scene that’s elemental and ethereal at the same time.

The picture, by noted Norwegian landscape artist Hans Dahl, belonged to Amalie’s late grandmother, a refined woman who smoked cigarettes from an ivory holder and drank gin and tonic on a Friday morning. Amalie’s mother used to say that it was Amalie in the painting. It’s not hard to see why.

“I had a connection to it from before I can remember,” says Amalie today, as we sit at a dining table in a living room that’s one part uncluttered Scandinavian stylishness, one part hygge-style cosiness. “The album sounds like the painting looks.”

The album she’s referring to is Folkesange, her third as Myrkur, the one-woman  project she founded in the mists of the early 2010s.

Where Myrkur’s past releases have bridged worlds – black metal, post-rock, blackgaze, classical – Folkesange is different. This is traditional Scandinavian music played on traditional Scandinavian instruments, sung predominantly in Danish. There are some covers, some originals, though there’s not a trace of metal in the music or the vocals. It’s all there in the title: Folkesange. Folk Songs.

That Amalie Bruun is releasing an album of sometimes beautiful, sometimes melancholic Scandinavian folk music really shouldn’t surprise anyone who has followed her journey. Partly because that aspect of who she is has always been present in Myrkur’s music – all she’s doing with Folkesange is separating it out.

But mainly because Amalie Bruun has lived more lives than most other people. That, as much as anything, is what puts her out there on her own.

Two life-changing things have happened since Myrkur’s last album, 2017’s expansive and brilliant Mareridt, both inextricably linked.

One: Amalie Bruun got married. Her husband, Keith Abrami, is a fitness instructor and drummer with American death metal band Artificial Brain. The pair became romantically involved after Keith began playing as Myrkur’s touring drummer.

Keith is around, though he stays in the back bedroom today. This is because he is attending to the second life-changing thing that has happened to Amalie recently: the couple’s nine-week old son, Otto.

If Mareridt was the product of the vivid nightmares its creator endured before making it, Folkesange was defined by pregnancy and the impending birth of her first child.

She describes motherhood as joyous, though in her case the elation is edged with sadness. She discovered she was pregnant soon after she started writing the new album. “But I miscarried,” she says simply.

Advertisement

We ask if she’s OK talking about this. She nods, and explains that the miscarriage pushed her deeper into making Folkesange. A few days after entering the studio with producer (and Heilung co-founder) Christopher Juul, she discovered she was pregnant again. And that’s when the emotion really hit her.

“I was totally out of it, but in a beautiful way,” she says. “I wasn’t my normal human self. I become something else.” She laughs. “Very nauseated.”

She noticed that her vocals were different. “I never felt so in tune with singing as I did then. I had this power and this clarity, which was crazy. But it was the exact place to be, recording folk vocals with this new life growing in you.”

There were worries, of course, as well as other emotions. One of the songs on the new album, Gudernes Viljie (English translation: ‘The Will Of The Gods’) is about the miscarriage. “There were conflicted feelings, dealing with both this new life and this guilt feeling of this other life that never happened,” Amalie explains. “It was never a heartbeat, but you still feel like a mother. It was very intense.”

Amalie Bruun grew up listening to Scandinavian folk music. It resonated with her on a different level. “With my spirit,” she says. “It’s like in England: you have that singer-songwriter folk tradition, it’s historically ingrained. It shapes who you are, even if you don’t know it. Because it’s folk music, it’s told by people for people. So it’s inherited into the spirit of a population.”

Half of Folkesange’s 12 tracks are her versions of songs that she grew up listening to, while the others are her originals, though you’d be hard pushed to tell which is which. “This is a record that I wish had existed when I was young,” she says. “And it doesn’t exist, so I wanted to make it.”

Music, folk or otherwise, is in her blood. Her father, Michael Bruun, is a retired musician. He was semi-famous as a pop singer-songwriter in Denmark in the early 80s. “But he was not interested in fame,” says Amalie. “He’s shy and misanthropic.” Does she take after him? She smiles. “I do. Sometimes I wish I didn’t but I do.”

Her mother, by contrast, was a Jungian psychologist. “She tried her best not to bring her work home, but she did. You get analysed every day.”

As well as folk music, Amalie loved classical music as a child. She learned piano as a toddler, took up violin at five, and eventually attended music college as a teenager. “I wasn’t pushed into anything. It was all my choice. I was never interested in anything else.”

Advertisement

The first metal record Amalie Bruun fell in love with was Transilvanian Hunger, Darkthrone’s sub-lo-fi black metal masterpiece. Before that she’d listened to the stuff teenagers listen to: Nirvana, Björk, that kind of thing. Aside from her older brother’s Metallica and Judas Priest records, she’d never listened to much metal.

“Usually that transition takes years, right?” she says. “But all of a sudden I hear Transilvanian Hunger. It reminded me of classical music.”

“The Starter Pack” is how she jokingly describes Transilvanian Hunger today. “If you like that, a lot other black metal sounds really pleasant. A lot easier on the ear.”

When she was 22 years old, Amalie Bruun bought herself a one-way plane ticket to New York and started another life. It was the city’s rich and romantic musical history that drew her there: the poets, the punks, the freaks, the superstars. She arrived with no cellphone and nowhere to stay.  “I didn’t know what I was doing,” she says. “But that’s what New York is. You just go there and see what happens.”

She found a place to stay with friends of friends from back in Denmark, and walked all over the city, giving her demo CD to venues. “Just piano music,” is how she describes what she was doing. “Me singing little melodies.”

She played anywhere that would have her, in front of whatever crowds were there. “Oh, it wasn’t the cool people,” she says. “It was definitely uncool. But it was never about fame. I just wanted to go out and earn my stripes a little bit.”

In the early 2010s, she met guitarist and co-vocalist Brian Harding, and they put together Ex Cops. Based in oh-so-trendy Brooklyn and playing shoegaze-inflected alt-pop, they basically screamed ‘hipster’.

Advertisement

She recoils at the suggestion. “I fucking hate that,” she says vehemently. “I hate the whole hipster thing.”

Ex Cops were ultimately small fish in a big indie rock pond – their main claim to fame was that their second album was executive-produced by Smashing Pumpkins major domo Billy Corgan. Amalie liked being in Ex Cops, but she liked the music industry a lot less. Or at least the part of it she where she found herself.

“I would be in the studio, working on ideas I had written and people would say, ‘Let’s just let Amalie get it out of her system,’” she says. “I was so offended by that. There were comments on what I would wear, whether or not I could have armpit hair in photos. It takes away your agency as a musician and as a woman.”

There were two Amalie Bruuns while she was living in New York. Or rather, there was one living two separate lives.

There was one Amalie Bruun who was making music with Ex Cops and dipping her toes into the world of modelling – she appeared, raven-haired, in a Chanel advert directed by the legendary Martin Scorsese – and, even more bizarrely, alongside 90s crooner Michael Bolton dressed as Forrest Gump in a video by spoof R’n’B group The Lonely Island (Bolton was dressed as Forrest Gump, not her).

Advertisement

Then there was Amalie Bruun the black metal fan. She mentioned her love of the genre in Ex Cops interviews, even if she sounded almost apologetic about it. “I was,” she concedes. “People thought it was too weird.”

Few people picked up on the references anyway, let alone knew that she was quietly working on a project of her own in the shadows: Myrkur.

She had been writing folk melodies on the violin for years. Gradually she added more and more metal elements. Once in a while she dared play it to other people.

Eventually word reached underground metal stronghold Relapse Records, who released her self-titled debut mini-album in 2014. Back then her identity was a mystery: she was as much apparition as musician. “I wanted the music to speak for itself,” she says of her anonymity, as if it’s the most obvious thing ever.

But mysteries don’t stay mysterious for long these days. When someone joined the dots and uncovered her other life as one half of a trendy Brooklyn indie-pop band, the keyboard warriors went into swivel-eyed overdrive. She was a fake. A poser. Worse, a woman – one who’d dared gatecrash the testosterone-heavy sausage party that is the black metal scene.

“I was blissfully unaware of it,” she says of the negative attention she initially attracted. “Then it was, like, ‘Why am I being hated by people who don’t know me at all. At least get to know me.’” She shrugs. “It didn’t affect me much. I was there to play music, not fuck around with all that stuff.”

She has a theory: that people objected to the fact that she’d worked with Kris ‘Garm’ Rygg, frontman with former black metal avant-gardists Ulver. “Honestly, what really pissed off a lot of people in the beginning was that I did work with some of the Scandinavian black metal artists that they look up to. I think that was very annoying and provocative to that crowd.”

Not that she was a woman? She thinks carefully.

“I think it’s the fact that I didn’t follow the rules of how women in metal should behave. I’m not the first woman in metal, I just did it a little bit more my own way.”

Anyway, she says with a faint smile, she wasn’t above a little button-pushing herself.

“I was never deliberately provocative,” she begins. “But when I realised how little it took I did take a bit of pleasure in it. I knew that if you post a picture with Attila from Mayhem, then they’re just going to go off. But it’s not like I did that just to piss people off...”

If Mareridt silenced the haters, or some of them at least, then Folksange, with its absence of volume, will probably fire them up again. Amalie Bruun couldn’t care less if it does. She has more important concerns. Such as her new life, as the mother of Otto.

She’s not pretending that motherhood won’t impact on how she approaches her career. There will be no big world tours around Folkesange, for one. “You can’t pretend it doesn’t play into it as a woman. Maybe as a man, it’s different. I know a lot of metal musicians, they have kids and they continue the same life. That’s cool, but when you’re a mother you can’t do that. I want the two sides of my life to co-exist.”

Has she worked out how that will work?

“I don’t know yet how that works.”

Is she looking forward to it?

“It’s nerve-wracking.”

Is she worried?

“No, I’m not worried. I’m in control. It will be how I plan it to be.”

With perfect timing, the sound of a baby crying drifts from the back room. Amalie gets up and returns a few seconds later holding Otto, a tiny bundle of nine-week-old humanity.

It’s only then that you realise how unique Amalie Bruun, and Myrkur, is: not just a woman operating in such a male-dominated field, but a mother as well.

Before we leave her and her family, she says that she’s looking forward to following up Folksange with “another metal-style record with distorted guitars”. But for now that’s in the future. Another chapter, another life.

[doomedandstoned]

Top 10 Albums Of The 2010′s

~By Calvin Lampert~

I think it is safe to say that underground metal has enjoyed a period of unprecedented growth and popularity in the last 10 years. But when I am saying this I am not only thinking about the heavy underground; those adherents of the Sabbath sound and this whole new wave of doom metal bands. I am thinking of the fact that (underground) metal has undergone a change in image, too.

Though frequently maligned as hipster bands (or metal for people who don't like metal), acts like Deafheaven have brought metal to a whole new audience and raised awareness of the genre as a genuine form of art that does not just exist for its own sake; that metal fans only go for gore, beer and self-referential horn-throwing. Not that Neurosis and Godflesh haven’t been ambassadors of this mindset for more than three decades already, but it feels that the understanding of metal as art seems to have finally broken through to an audience outside of the traditional metal subculture in the past decade.

I think it is in no small part thanks to some of the bands on this list I have assembled (though I may have forgone obvious picks like Alcest and Deafheaven for more personal choices). And in retrospect, it should’ve been a list of bands rather than records, as most of the artists on this list would’ve have had a claim to a spot on here, with any record they put out. Take that as a hurray for consistency. So, without further ado, my picks for the best and most remarkable records of the decade.

10. Akhlys – 'The Dreaming I' (Debemur Morti - 2015)

The Dreaming I by Akhlys

I can’t help but wonder if Naas Alcameth of AKHLYS (also of Nightbringer, Aoratos and Bestia Arcana) set out with the express intent to create what is essentially a nigh perfect atmospheric black metal record when he started working on The Dreaming I. It damn sure feels like, each strum, syllable, and beat sits at the right place; the pieces of this nightmarish puzzle fit with an unsettling ease.

Photograph by by Kuba Leszko

The sound really does justice to the underlying concept of dreams and nightmares, as you’ll rarely find a record with such an impenetrable atmosphere. Once you hit play you’re soon enveloped by countless layers of swirling guitars, all at the command of Naas Alcameth, and he seems hellbent on suffocating you with them. The Dreaming I is about as close as you can get sleep paralysis-made-music. If you put off black metal as spooky noise made by a bunch hooded esoteric nerds you might’ve found your match in Akhlys. They are just that, they’re dead serious, and the results are impressive.

9. Elephant Tree – 'Elephant Tree' (Magnetic Eye Records - 2016)

Elephant Tree by Elephant Tree

I’ve observed myself growing increasingly apart from most stoner rock as of late, sometimes even antagonizing the genre. I’m afraid I’m just burned out on it and grown embittered, so a record from those genres ending up on my Albums of the Decade list should give you a hint of just how special it really is.

That is not to say that there haven’t been some real stoner rock heavy hitters this decade, such as Gozus Revival, Valley of the Suns Sayings of the Seers or Lo-Pans Salvador, but there’s something to ELEPHANT TREE's self-titled record that just so narrowly sets it apart from the others.

Photograph by Phil Smithies

What that is I am still not quite sure, and I had my fair share of relistens. Maybe it is the tasteful balance act of the production that makes this record so wonderfully ethereal but also ridiculously crushing. Or the sleek as all hell songwriting where every hook fires but the flow remains impeccable. Or the gorgeous harmonic interplay of Jack Townley and Pete Hollands vocals. Or maybe really just the sum of it all.

Whatever it is, Elephant Tree get it so very right and it is a true joy to behold such a well-written and fine-tuned record in a genre that has become all too prone to shoddiness and idle Kyuss worship. If there is any justice in the world, Elephant Tree will be looked back as a classic of the genre.

8. Oranssi Pazuzu – 'Värähtelijä' (Svart Records/20 Buck Spin - 2016)

Värähtelijä by Oranssi Pazuzu

So many have tried to do it. Countless chonged out Hendrix worshippers. Australian neo-psych darlings. But they all failed. Turns out the holy grail of psychedelia was dug up by a bunch of dudes in the frozen wastes of Finland when they decided to throw together black metal and almost every imaginable psych rock permutation under the firmament. Absolute insanity inducing balls-to-the-wall trippiness ensues.

ORANSSI PAZUZU is their name, ego-death squared in hyperspace is their game and Värähtelijä is the latest in a slew of attempts to smear your brain across the event horizon, and their most accomplished one so far. Think Hawkwind trying to interpret the soundtrack of Interstellar with a guy being spaghettified by a black hole screaming on top of it. Huge, plodding riffs and spacey synth fuckery abound.

Film by Shelby Kray

This madness extends to their live shows, yours truly (being completely sober) suffered a sensory overload when they launched into the crescendo of the album opener "Saturaatio" at Roadburn 2016. This band is taking things to the next level, and something tells me that Värähtelijä is just another chapter in an increasingly maddening venture.

7. Conan – 'Blood Eagle' (Napalm Records - 2014)

You can’t really draw a picture of the doom scene in the '10s without CONAN. And I do mean that in quite the literal sense, as seemingly every self-respecting doom fan seems to own at least one Conan shirt and you can’t really go to a gig without seeing one.

By all accounts the band probably could’ve retired years ago and just live off those rad merch designs. But Conan knows no rest -- always writing, always touring, always scheming. Thus the band has fed a steady stream of releases to a cult-like following over the years and narrowing down the output of such an important band to just one record is no small task. My choice eventually fell on the fan favorite, 2014's Blood Eagle.

Photograph by Sally Townsend

Conan had already pretty much established themselves as the emergent sludge-doom act of the decade at that time, but as we know they’re not one to rest on their laurels and Blood Eagle was just them driving the point home and the stake deeper, solidifying a grasp on the scene that hasn’t waned ever since, and they did it oh so righteously, by the primordial might of tonal displacement and drop F glory.

Conan might have the closest thing to a universal doom appeal because they speak to your baser instincts. Songs like "Foehammer" or "Total Conquest" seem like trebuchets aimed at the synapses of your reptilian brain, and I can’t help but admire these noble DIY barbarians, who so deservedly have carved out their place in the canon of the genre.

6. SubRosa – 'More Constant than the Gods' (Profound Lore - 2013)

More Constant Than The Gods by SubRosa

SUBROSA was one of a kind. If one band calling it quits this decade broke my heart, it was them. But before doing so they gifted us three outstanding post-metal records, whose folk and chamber music flourishes felt completely unique, intimate, and anachronistic in a genre dominated by more vast and spacious narratives. They reached inward rather than outward and did so with a no-parts-wasted mentality.

In a world rife with one-trick bands, SubRosa's employ of multiple vocalists and two electric violins felt natural and unabashedly non-gimmicky, and they would reveal the true potential of their sound on 2013's harrowingly beautiful More Constant than the Gods.

Photograph by Alyssa Herrman

More Constant is remarkable for its elegant and restrained way of instilling dread. Hardly any harsh vocals, the tempo never goes beyond a steady stride, just those horrific and yet also beautiful violins, plodding guitars, and downright poetic lyrics. And SubRosa seem to feel right at home on either terrain, be it the skin-crawling lead guitar line of "Affliction" or the grandiose outro section of "Fat of the Ram." One can only hope that SubRosa will return one day. A band that was truly novel, and not just a novelty.

5. Tchornobog – 'Tchornobog' (Fallen Empire / I, Voidhanger - 2017)

TCHORNOBOG is many things. Among others, a dark, ancient Slavic deity. In the world of music, a monolithic amalgamation of extreme metal, some Eldritch chimera of cavernous black, death, and doom metal. And the beast of one Markov Soroka, though him stating that the Tchornobog inhabits his head begs the question who might really be in charge?

Photograph by Nona Limmen

Soroka does indeed seem to be guided by spirits since he started the project at the age 14, and eight years of gestation and arduous work culminated in one of the most engrossing, all-consuming records I have come across this decade. Far be it from me to reduce Tchornobog’s remarkability down to the young age of its creator, but Sorokas ambition and execution of those ambitions could run circles around a lot of veteran extreme metal bands. The man is just flat out talented. And that is not even taking his various other projects (Drown, Aureole, Krukh) into account, or his curation work through his own label, Vigor Deconstruct.

As such, Tchornobog ultimately is, among many other things, a bright spotlight shining on a young man who has all the makings of being the next big underground metal mastermind. I’m sure you’ll be inclined to agree as soon as Soroka brings out the grand piano and saxophone on "III: Non-Existence’s Warmth (Infinite Natality Psychosis)" to perform what I’d like to call Lovecraftian Lounge Music. He must have a thing for Demilich too, judging from those song titles.

4. Hell – 'III' (Lower Your Head / Pesanta Urfolk - 2012)

Hell III by Hell

There is a subtle power in melodies, particularly melancholic and sad ones. Doom, and more specifically funeral doom, have long since sought to harness the power of the melody, but I think nobody has been quite as effective or moved me so profoundly with a simple plucked melody as MSW, the singular mind of HELL.

Just one minute into Mourn, the opening (and penultimate) track of Hell III), I am already instilled with a deep sense of melancholy, but also foreboding doom. However, few songs can just thrive from having a good riff or lead -- and there’s 17 minutes yet to go. I’ll spoil you and say that in this time Hell shifts between doom, black metal, neoclassical music, and dark ambient. That’s a lot of territory to cover and it becomes apparent that for how meticulously well crafted its individual parts are, MSW never loses sight of the bigger picture and the transitions between these different sounds are seamless.

Film by Billy Goate

At the danger of sounding like a huge fucking nerd, I really am more inclined to refer to "Mourn" and its follow up "Decedere" as movements rather than songs and if the songwriting doesn’t clue you in you’ll be persuaded by the time Decedere breaks out the operatic vocals and a flute accompanied by a string ensemble. And no matter if he’s performing a contemplative acoustic piece or pounding you in the ground with some absolutely hellish (the band name is apt as can be) blackened doom, MSW always manages to maintain an aura of grandeur. MSW is not just a great songwriter, he’s a veritable composer, and III is his magnum opus.

3. Mizmor – 'Yodh' (Gilead Media - 2016)

Yodh by מזמור

If whatever has come before was bleak, then Yodh is pitch fucking black. This decade hasn’t lacked in dark records (not even taking metal into account -- Mount Eerie's A Crow Looked at Me, Nick Cave’s Skeleton Tree, or The Caretakers Everywhere at the End of Time), but taking on existential dread specifically (and thereby becoming a vessel for it) MIZMOR's Yodh remains unsurpassed in its sheer effectiveness to instill said dread in the listener and is possibly the most harrowing record of the last 10 years.

Photo by Kento Woolery

As befits the theme, Yodh genuinely sounds like the work of a broken man. A miserable slab of glacial funeral doom and grimy black metal, but delivered with a brute strength and conviction that really suggests more defiance than self-pity. I’d be remiss to not point out ALN's incredibly varied vocal performance, ranging from wretched snarls and air-starved bellows to what I can only describe as pterodactyl shrieks, all carrying the same biting vitriol as the instrumentals.

Film by Shelby Kray

Yet for all its doom and gloom, Yodh surprises with occasional moments of tenderness and outright (if melancholic) beauty, too, such as the acoustic intro of "II: A Semblance Waning" or the massive main riff of "III: The Serpent Eats Its Tail" that feels like the sort of thing Pallbearer would’ve come up with if they had been more into Mournful Congregation than Warning.

All these things combined with thoughtful, introspective lyrics make Yodh into an incredibly powerful and downright visceral record, and if for you the main draw of doom metal lies its emotional potency (as it does for me) then Yodh is an essential listen. Let ALN shout down the very pillars that uphold your personal beliefs of life’s meaning.

2. Pallbearer – 'Sorrow and Extinction' (Profound Lore - 2012)

Sorrow And Extinction by Pallbearer

Warning was the first band to try to bridge the gap between traditional and modern doom metal, and while Watching from a Distance might have a fair claim to be one of the saddest metal records out there, in my eyes it was PALLBEARER who took that formula even further and perfected it with their 2011 debut Sorrow and Extinction. To me, it’s a classic record in both senses. A landmark of post-millennium doom and a throwback to the days of yore, when Saint Vitus and Candlemass were in charge of bumming everyone out; while still maintaining the larger-than-life-feel and sonic heft of modern doom championed by bands like Yob or Neurosis.

Photo by Sally Townsend

But Sorrow and Extinction isn’t just some roided up epic doom sans the operatic vocals, Pallbearer are far too clever to suffer such a pitfall. Granted, Sorrow sounds huge, and while there’s plenty of the heavy stuff to go around what makes Sorrow so great is how catchy it is. There is no weak song on this record (admittedly there’s only five), and while most bands could only hope to one day write a riff as good as "Devoid of Redemption's" main theme, it seems like Pallbearer just comes up with them on a whim, and their ability to do so doesn’t seem to have faded three records into their career -- not even to speak of Brett Campbell's soulful lyrics and passionate delivery.

Film by Billy Goate

Then, of course, there’s the amazing guitar interplay between Campbell and Devin Holt, chiefly on the casket closer "Given to the Grave," whose second half essentially boils down to them constantly trading dramatic leads with each other like the world's most woeful ping pong game.

Sorrow and Extinction is not only a deeply moving yet utterly anthemic record, but also one that successfully marries the past and the present of doom. In that regard, it is a preciously rare and so far unsurpassed record.

1. YOB – 'Clearing the Path to Ascend' (Neurot Records - 2014)

Clearing The Path To Ascend by YOB

Writing about metal without resorting to superlatives is hard. Try to practice restraint in the presence of something whose very nature lacks restraint. I am definitely guilty of that lack of restraint; one has only got to scroll up again to confirm it. But luckily some records are so very superlative that I do not have to take that editorial high road and can fire all the “mosts” and “-ests” at will. In fact, they almost require you to use them. Clearing the Path to Ascend by YOB is one such record. Even among all these preceding superlative records it stands above and beyond.

Photo by Angelique Le Marchand

Clearing the Path to Ascend is so vast, it feels singular. It is one and it is all. When I think larger-than-life sound, Clearing comes to mind first. It has become the very benchmark with which I measure other records. Yob's big and beautiful only consists of four tracks, but they made each feel like a distinct part of a greater journey. "In Our Blood" opens with a recording of Alan Watts telling you it is "time to wake up," before the song slowly rises into a stretched-out draw and crash, eventually unfurling into a manic guitar line.

"Nothing to Win" feels like Yob's own take on Neurosis’ Through Silver in Blood. It is an unrelenting, steady 11-minute march down a highway of broken glass, utterly windswept and viciously hopeless. "Unmask the Spectre" seems to tread similarly bitter paths but manages to wrestle itself free into two grandiose spiraling crescendos.

Film by Billy Goate

The death knell of an album closer that is "Marrow" shouldn’t really need much of an introduction at this point. It still feels like I’ll see a link, post or share of it every other day. It has become an omnipresence in the doom scene, and deservingly so. Yob dials back on the gloom and shines all the brighter. "Marrow" is not just hopeful; it is downright ecstatic and by the time Mike Scheidt launches into the grand solo of the track (so very gracefully accompanied by a Hammond organ played by producer Billy Barnett) has ascended to a genuine sermon.

Though Clearing had its fair share of dark moments "Marrow" closes the record on a remarkably conciliatory note and I really think that speaks of Yob as a (metal) band. Call it a big move to offer closure -- a fitting end to such a big record. One that suits the title of ‘Album of the Decade,’ and embodies the spirit of metal that wants to be just more.

Calvin's Choice: 100 Best of the Decade

YOB - Clearing the Path to Ascend

Pallbearer - Sorrow and Extinction

Mizmor - Yodh

Hell - Hell III

Tchornobog - Tchornobog

SubRosa - More Constant Than The Gods

Conan - Blood Eagle

Oranssi Pazuzu - Värähtelijä

Elephant Tree - Elephant Tree

Akhlys - The Dreaming I

Clutch - Earth Rocker

Merkstave - Merkstave

Gozu - Revival

Chelsea Wolfe - Pain Is Beauty

Valley of the Sun - The Sayings of the Seers

Inter Arma - Paradise Gallows

Thou - Heathen

Om - Advaitic Songs

Bell Witch - Mirror Reaper

All Them Witches - Dying Surfer Meets His Maker

Horn of the Rhino - Weight of Coronation

Boss Keloid - Melted on the Inch

KALEIKR - Heart Of Lead

Jeremy Irons & The Ratgang Malibus - Spirit Knife

Woman is the Earth - Torch of Our Final Night

Weyes Blood - Titanic Rising

LINGUA IGNOTA - Caligula

Queens of the Stone Age - ...Like Clockwork

Messa - Feast for Water

Anna von Hausswolff - Dead Magic

Mamiffer - The World Unseen

Samothrace - Reverence to Stone

Primitive Man - Scorn

Fórn - The Departure of Consciousness

Khemmis - Absolution

Bongripper - Miserable

High on Fire - De Vermis Mysteriis

UN - Sentiment

Cult of Luna - Mariner

Slomatics - Future Echo Returns

MISTHYRMING - Söngvar elds og óreiðu

Dvne - Asheran

Earth - Primitive and Deadly

Mars Red Sky - Apex III (Praise For The Burning Soul)

The Midnight Ghost Train - Cypress Ave.

Panopticon - Panopticon - Roads to the North

Mare Cognitum - Phobos Monolith

Sólstafir - Ótta

Have a Nice Life - The Unnatural World

Furia - Księżyc Milczy Luty

Tardigrada - Emotionale Ödnis

Yellow Eyes - Immersion Trench Reverie

Stoned Jesus - Seven Thunders Roar

Höstblod - Mörkrets Intåg

Ulver - The Assassination of Julius Caesar

Zola Jesus - Okovi

Funereal Presence - Achatius

Wormlust - The Feral Wisdom

Daughters - You Won't Get What You Want

L'Acephale - L'Acéphale

40 Watt Sun - The Inside Room

Vilkacis - Beyond the Mortal Gate

Bossk - Audio Noir

Carpenter Brut - Trilogy

Sumac - What One Becomes

Death Grips - Exmilitary

Red Fang - Murder the Mountains

Lo-Pan - Salvador

Whores. - Gold

Truckfighters - Universe

Greenleaf - Trails & Passes

Bölzer - Aura

Monolord - Vaenir

Dead to a Dying World - Elegy

The Body - I Shall Die Here

Mutoid Man - War Moans

Neurosis - Fires Within Fires

Opeth - Pale Communion

Planning for Burial - Below the House

Triptykon - Melana Chasmata

Graveyard - Hisingen Blues

Saor - Aura

Windhand - Grief's Infernal Flower

Egypt - Endless Flight

Emma Ruth Rundle - Marked For Death

Deafheaven - Sunbather

Kadavar - Kadavar

Uncle Acid & the Deadbeats - Blood Lust

Vanum - Ageless Fire

Dai-Ichi - Dai-Ichi

Lord Mantis - Pervertor

Ne Obliviscaris - Portal Of I

Loss - Horizonless

Tome of the Unreplenished - Innerstanding

Elder - Lore

Witch Mountain - Cauldron of the Wild

Ahab - The Giant

Alcest - Kodama

The Dillinger Escape Plan - Dissociation

Sleep - The Sciences

[baphelon]

My top 20 albums of the Decade

This decade has been really important in shaping my taste of music from generic and boring power and viking/folk metal stuff into something more refined and nuanced. So I decided to make a list with some of my favorite albums from the 2010s for you guys to check out!

First some general notes before we’re ready to get goin under the cut:

This list is purely based on my opinion and my opinion alone

There will be a big chunk of honorable mentions in alphabetical order at the end because there are simply too many albums important to me in this decade so check these mentions out aswell since they also include a more diverse cast of genres than the main list!

I decided to exclude Mgła completely from this list allthough Exercises in Futility (2015) might’ve earned a spot. I simply cannot support this band anymore in light of recent controversies regarding their close connections with far right musicians and neo nazis.

I’ll provide explanations aswell as links to a song for each of the listed albums to give a taste of what each entry is about. If you still have question about any of the entries just shoot me a message or comment!

🤡 Also a huge applause for Batushka for being the absolute clowns of the metal scene this decade! What a shitshow they’ve given us! 🤡

20. King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard - Paper Mâché Dream Balloon (2015)

Paper Mâché Dream Balloon is a very fun, very relaxing and all around enjoyable album by the psychedelic rock masterminds of King Gizzard. Give it a listen at a nice afternoon with a cup of hot cocoa or tea, you’ll not regret it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RobhSr2bozU

19. Portal - Vexovoid (2013)

Vexovoid is a chaotic mess of an experimental Death Metal record. Its dark, brooding and bizarre aswell as interesting, genuinly scary and amazing. Portal mix breathtakingly weird sounds with harsh vocals and complicated rhythmic structures. Certainly not for everyone but definetly for me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7rj92VOWM5Y

18. Borknagar - Urd (2012)

Melodic, cathartic, progressive and melancholic.Urd is a well rounded progressive Black Metal masterpiece with some very unique riffs and melodies. I always come back to this record and always feel the same excitement when the first song Epochalypse starts. Broknagar tell their apocalyptic tale in dazzling beauty with crystal clear sound.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXVlBYW8Ero

17. Violet Cold - Anomie (2017)

Simply one of the best post black metal albums recorded so far in my opinion. Emotional and intense aswell as intricate and crafted with love.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNNPUBJVWp8

16. Enslaved - RIITIIR (2012)

A bit on the underrated side when it comes to Enslaved records but an absolute banger. RIITIIRs homogenous compositions string together into a masterfully crafted endproduct that takes the listener onto a journey of mind and soul. Quite possibly their most nuanced work to date.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WavEDnmBpgk

15. Sólstafir - Ótta (2014)

Anyone who has listened to Sólstafir ever should know about how amazing they are. How captavating and touching their songs are and how many tears one can shed over the sheer beauty of their melancholic music. Ótta is one of their most refined and clear cut record so far and it does wonders on the longer tracks.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8n8Uy5KmvU

14. Alcest - Shelter (2014)

Again one of these Albums to listen to when you can relax in a safe environment or when you need to turn any place you are at into a shelter. Healing for you soul and mind without being hard to get into for even non-metal fans. Enjoy this beautiful piece of soothing music whenever you feel lost or alone. It will help.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZ57uBx68N8

13. Der Weg Einer Freiheit - Finisterre (2017)

Dark, harsh and unapologetically black this album rises over its sometimes weak lyrics. Der Weg Einer Freiheit are a one of a kind band that can proudly hold the banner of German Black Metal high for a new generation. And this most current record of theirs shows what they can do with the tools provided by their label. Especially the re-recorded version of Neubeginn on the special edition is a highlight. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Ic-dXBtP10

12. Saor - Forgotten Paths (2019)

39 minutes that feel like 5. A breathtaking journey through the wilderness on the stomping steps of blastbeats and incredible folk influences. Saors best record by far.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9bMRTvmvQQ

11. Fen - Dustwalker (2013)

A very soft album dripping with athmosphere at every corner. Its a bit hard to get into but once it catches you it will just not let go.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtBqlBr0cCQ

10. Messa - Bellfry (2016)

Groovy is the best word to describe this records vibes. A weird attribute to attach to a band that leans heavily into Doom but it fits. A fantastic album by a fantastic band.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HADlImQrG4w

09. Ulver - War of the Roses (2011)

Ulvers strinkingly unique sound easily make them one of my top 5 favorite bands of all time but I cannot explain why this album resonates with me so much. Its just very good!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DPXMM6u94Q

08. Ghost - Opus Eponymous (2010)

The first record by swedish doom, heavy metal and occult rock group Ghost is to this day quite possibly their most atmospheric album. Gloom and doom mix with catchy tunes to form one hell of an enjoyable listening experience.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PakoE1eBps

07. Downfall of Gaia - Suffocating in the Swarm of Cranes (2012)

Damn. What an album. What a band! Together with Der Weg Einer Freiheit one of the biggest new progenies of German Black Metal. Bold, black, harsh and full of melancholy. Simply superb!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaAEJXU7JHY

06. Sólstafir - Svartir Sandar (2011)

A second time Sólstafir weasel their way onto this list and its rightfully deserved. This album is stunning in its complexity and passion. Each song brings something new and exciting to the table. Just listen to it, please, I beg you. Do yourself a favour!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1qh9XSqnTo

05. Alcest - Kodama (2016)

Alcest is selfcare. Kodama is selfcare. Perfection.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQsXnldCDeU

04. Ulver - Messe I.X-VI.X (2013)

A bit out there and hard to get into as its one of Ulvers most experiemental pieces of work so far. It was my first real taste of what would become on of my favorite bands real quick (at least my first taste of their newer stuff after I had only listened to some of their old black metal records).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtHEFDVSfvs

03. Der Weg einer Freiheit - Stellar (2015)

In my opinion just their most well rounded album. Its hard to pick real favorites since all of their records bring something amazing to the table. So I decided to choose the overall most coherent album as the highest on this list. It also contains some of my favourite songs like Repulsion and Einkehr.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_PYJYTicbE

02. Dornenreich - Freiheit (2014)

Freedom. Thats what this title means and this is what this album provides. This album cleansed my skin, healed my soul and replanted my crops. I shall live forever thanks to the power of this masterpiece of neofolk.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbz7zlVtwcc

01. Ulver - The Assassination of Julius Caesar (2017)

This is it. The best album of the decade in my opinion. Quite possibly one of the best albums of all time. A synth heavy piece of art that evokes ideas and the style of New Wave music and mixes it with the melancholic moodiness of post metal lyrics. Every song a hit, every song unique and every song simply great. Well rounded, coherent and still experimental when nescessary. Ulver dropped a bomb with this one!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XHE28JiuSQk

HONORABLE MENTIONS! (in alphabetical order)

Alcest- Spiritual Instinct (2019) An Autumn for Crippled Children - The Long Goodbye (2015) Batushka - Litourgiya (2015) Behemoth - The Satanist (2014) BIG BRAVE - Ardor (2017) Blind Guardian - At the Edge of Time (2010) Bròn - Decay (2019) Busdriver - Electricity is on Our Side (2018) Darkthrone - The Underground Resistance (2013) Deafheaven - Sunbather (2013) Deafheaven - Ordinary Corrupt Human Love (2018) Downfall of Gaia - Atrophy (2016) Downfall of Gaia - The Ethic of Radical Finitude (2019) Fen - The Dead Light (2019) Fen - Winter (2017) Ghost - Meliora (2015) Hail Spirit Noir - Pneuma (2012) Harakiri for the Sky - III: Trauma (2016) Ihsahn - Das Seelenbrechen (2013) Ihsahn - Arktis (2016) Kamelot - Poetry for the Poisoned (2010) Katatonia - Dead End Kings (2012) King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard - I'm in Your Mind (2014) King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard - Murder of The Universe (2017) Kylver - The Mountain Ghost (2015) Mahr - Antelux (2018) Messa - Feast for Water (2018) Mono - Requiem for Hell (2016) Oceans of Slumber - Winter (2016) Satyricon - Satyricon (2013) scallops hotel - too much of life is mood (2016) Sylvaine - Atoms Alligned, Coming Undone (2018) The Devils Blood - The Thousandfold Epicentre (2011) Violet Cold - Sommermorgen I-III (2018)

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading. Tell me about your favs! If you have questions please feel free to reach out to me!

[idontneednofuckinhug]

My 25 favourite albums of the 2010′s

When it came down to making a list of my favourite projects through the 2010's, it really became clear to me how difficult of a task this was - I've listened to hundreds and hundreds of albums, EP's and Mixtapes during this time frame with artists from different genres, during different times of my life, where I needed different types of music to soothe my soul. When I started writing down the albums I want to put in my decade list, the first thing I set as a rule to myself was that I'd have only one album per artist, just to avoid repetitiveness and so I can actually think about which artists really did leave a mark on me during this time frame and not just have a list of 10 artists with my favourite 2-3 albums from each. Even then, I originally had more than 35 albums written down as standouts for me during this time and I wanted to originally make a top 20 - I quickly realized that wouldn't be possible, but a top 35 or top 30 would be way too big, so I decided to settle on a top 25 and even then I realized I'd leave out some generational artists like Gambino, JID, 6LACK and more. After that I just decided I wouldn't rank them, it would just be 25 albums that were my favourite during the decade - no rankings, because really, how can I compare a hip-hop album to an Indie album for instance? I couldn't. I hope this list raises a discussion and we can talk about your favourite albums during this period as well or you can tell me I'm braindead for leaving out someone from the list. So in no particular order, I'll list the albums and leave some thoughts on each:

A$AP Rocky - AT.LONG.LAST.A$AP (2015) Althogh this album was released in 2015, it took me till about two years later to really appreciate it as a project - it was my coming of age album, where I realized that I need to love myself and focus on my own well-being, to have that self-confidence that reflects the reality of who you are as a person and that attracts others to be interested in what's going on with you. The album was and still is very relevant to the environment I didn't want to be in and to push myself to achieve what I've been dreaming of, as well as reflect on the existential topics I've always raised within myself regarding love, violence and pain.

Car Seat Headrest - Twin Fantasy (2018) I was a bit late to the party with this one, as I only started listening to it in 2019, a year after its release, but I have to admit, Twin Fantasy really reflects all of the impulsive emotions I have within myself regarding loneliness, being insecure and counting on the people you love so that you help each other out, outgrowing your childish opinions and understanding of relationships and realizing your partner struggles just as much as you do. This might be my favourite indie-rock project right now.

Chance the Rapper - Acid Rap (2013) This album was a big part of me during my teenage years - I remember it reflecting the issues I was facing when I was 16-18 and it really made me vibe with it, due to the appreciation I had for my friends and my free time during that time, at the same time addressing the inner feelings of whether you're doing the right thing with your life. Listening to it now, years later gives me an alternative view of it as well, as an adult who looks with nostalgia at his younger self and realizes how much emotions I've missed from this project.

Freddie Gibbs & Madlib - Pinata (2014) Arguably the album with the best production of all time - the free-flowing jazzy and soulful beats from Madlib, underlined with Gibbs's absurd flow, the story-telling of him having to sell drugs and rob people to make a living, the absurd amount of genius features and the disgusting verses Gibbs had on songs like Harold's, Real and Robes just puts this project in a bracket of its own - I was wondering whether I prefer Pinata or Bandana, but as Bandana is a very fresh project still, this one has aged like a fine wine for me.

Frank Ocean - channel ORANGE (2012) Oddly enough, I'm one of those people who doesn't like Blonde as much as channel ORANGE. This album really hit home when it came down to my break-ups and realization I'd have to start all over again, both with myself and with someone else in the future - it really made me miss some people in my life time and time again and has brought me to tears more than you'd think. Frank's commentary on the album on different aspects of love and society really puts you in a frame of mind where you'll relate to almost everything he's experienced.

Schoolboy Q - Oxymoron (2014) This was the best story-telling album of the decade for me. The production which had a very modern take on old-school Gangsta rap really sticks to you with every song, the themes which Q explores with growing up in his ghetto neighbourhood, being part of the Crips, selling drugs and being part of gang-related crime really hits hard, combined with the realization he wants something better from life after growing up in poverty. Looking at Q grow up as a person after the release of this album and achieving all of his dreams really adds to this project as a modern day classic.

Flying Lotus - You're Dead (2014) Honestly, this one isn't for everyone - when making this list FlyLo had completely slipped my mind, even though I absolutely destroyed Flamagra with replays this year and had destroyed You're Dead in 2018 and 2017 due to the amazing production and vibe the album had. This project has an absolutely one of a kind take on combining modern jazz with psychedelic beats and hip-hop features, showcasing exactly why Flying Lotus is one of the best producers of modern times.

Danny Brown - Atrocity Excibition (2016) The culmination of Danny Brown's career for me, Danny addresses what it's like to completely hit rock bottom in this project, being a crackhead, who'd party, have sex with groupies and strangers and have no control over his life - there's a very neurotic and dark production on this album, combined with Danny's hilarious, but unsettling one-liners and verses which really could have been interpreted as a cry for helf, especially on songs such as "Ain't it Funny".`

Anderson. Paak - Malibu (2016) I recently wrote about Paak in a blogpost, discussing how he brought soul music back into the mainstream through a fantastic combination of rapping and singing with soul-inspired production and keeping a very funky vibe alive. This album was his best work for me and really showcased how much he's loving life, living to his best and enjoying every day of it, whilst at the same time addressing how difficult, but worth it love can be.

Mac Miller - Watching Movies With The Sound Off (2012) Mac was one of the first artists I wrote about, as I basically grew up with him, although he was a bit older than me (he's 92 and I'm 97). Every album of his was a part of my life and something I could relate to and live through, sometimes a bit later than its release, but no album has had such an eternal feel to it as Watching Movies. Both at 19 and at 22, I could find life lessons in this album and songs that could really describe what I'm going through, both on the end where my ego is taking over and I don't feel in control (Red Dot Music), to the downpoints of my life and addictions (Objects in the Mirror).

Earl Sweatshirt - I Don't Like Shit, I Don't Go Outside (2015) I love Earl. Realistically, I couldn't keep him out of this list, although none of his albums really are crazy standouts, as he has an extremely consistent body of work, but I decided to settle with this one. With its melancholic production, dark and slow beats and topics of depression, suicide and self-isolation, this album has been one of my main therapists every time life has absolutely killed me and had kept me afloat, thanks to having someone to relate to in those difficult, dark edgy times.

Denzel Curry - TA13OO (2018) Probably one of most inovative albums in the end of the 2010's, Denzel split the album up into three parts, all reflecting the emotions he felt during the proccess of creating it: Light, embracing his success and feelings of positivity; Grey, being introspective about his life and looking at the people trying to use him and hate him objectively; Dark, channeling all his anger and darkest emotions.

Vince Staples - Summertime '06 (2015) Vince really is one of the most complex artists of modern times for me personally, as his music is always very difficult to gauge and he always strives for innovation, rather than mainstream appeal. Summertime in reality is probably his most mainstream album, being an excellent storytelling project of his origins from Long Beach, California, the gang culture and harsh reality around him, his friends being shot down or turning into coke fiends and the way his environment has shaped him as a person of distrust and scepticism.

Sons of Kemet - Your Queen's a Reptile (2018) I really wanted to have a jazz project in this list and I was torn between this one, Everything's Beatiful and Drunk, but I always go back to this one the most. The avant-garde jazz-funk sound of this album, combined with traditionally african melodies and beats and progression each song goes through really makes this a multi-layered album which you will need to listen to again and again, as it also had a very political message in itself.

Kendrick Lamar - To Pimp a Butterfly (2015) If anyone asks me what's the greatest pure hip-hop album of all time, I always answer and have answered "To Pimp a Butterfly". This album was and in my opinion still is very much before its time - the jazz-rap production, social and political messages and discussion, the absurd beats and flows, the rhyme-schemes, everything about this album absolutely shines and whatever I say, will not do it justice, you need to listen to this start to back.

Jpegmafia - Veteran (2018) Being one of the most experimental and non-fuck giving rappers in the game right now, this album was really a step in the right direction for hip-hop, as it had production that you'd probably hear nowhere else, DYI samples, political comments and messages in a very unfiltered manner, showcasing Peggy's no-fucks-given attitude to everything in music, something he has continued to prove to this day.

Tame Impala - Currents (2015) I originally listened to this project for the first time in late 2016, but I really wasn't too much into Indie back then, so I gave it little thought. 3 years later, after listening to it again I realized what a genius piece of art Kevin Parker had created with its topics of self-discovery, introspection on life and it's psychedelic indie-rock production, really creating something that no one else had heard before.

Joey Bada$$ - 1999 (2012) What really makes me not believe this project exists is that Joey released it when he was 17. Having some of the best old-school inspired production and beats, with a jazzy, soulful sound, this album showcases a very young man challenge the political climate of its time, as well as have very matures takes and opinions on gang-culture, smoking weed and needing to grow up, realizing he can't live a life of parties and drugs if he wants to leave something that's worth it in the world.

Kanye West and Kid Cudi - Kids See Ghosts (2018) I was really wondering if I should put this album in my list, as I'm not the biggest Kanye fan and I haven't really liked much of Cudi's work past 2010, but in the end, this album is one of a kind. It tells the tale of two people struggling with their mental illnesses, but in the end conquering them, loving themselves and realizing that they have so much to give in life. The album shares a very heavy inspiration from Tame Impala's production as it has a fantastic psychedelic rock production, combined with samples and yells from Cudi and Kanye which you'd never hear in another project, which people take seriously.

Death Grips - No Love Deep Web (2012) Disgusting. Raw. Overpowering. Back in 2012 when this project was released, Death Grips completely took the internet by storm, as nothing like this had ever been released even in the underground hip-hop scene. Glitchy production, combined with guitar riffs, sudden breaks, yelling and completely unrelated gibberish in most of the songs, topped off with an album cover of Zach Hill's dick, this album inspired a decade of experimentation in rap music, leading to albums such as Kanye's Yeezy and Tyler's Cherry Bomb.

Ab-Soul - Control System (2012) Lyrically one of the most complex projects I've ever heard, Ab-soul's rhyme schemes and punchlines deserve a place in a literature course in University, as you'd need multiple listens on his songs to catch every little reference the rapper makes. The album has a fantastic jazz-inspired production, songs with a very disjointed beat, showcasing his emotional instability during making it, as he references his past and the personal issues he had to go through during life, the suicide of his beloved Alori Joh, which has caused him to contemplate suicide himself and the references to his co-stars in TDE's projects makes for a project you'll spend hours on end to try and figure out.

The Internet - Ego Death (2015) One of the best contemporary R&B projects, the Internet combines a very blues and soul inspired production for this one, giving face to their fantastic members ability to create a vibe and atmosphere in their music - the most impressive part for me with them is that this album really was the start of multiple fantastic artists solo careers: Syd, Steve Lacy, Matt Martians.

Little Simz - GREY Area (2019) This and Tame Impala were my only projects by non-american artists and for a reason. Little Simz crafted a fantastic hip-hop album filled with a mixture of aggressive, eerie production and classical jazz and blues samples, showcasing her talent to both sing and rap in every single song, exploring the difficulties of being a female MC in the modern era, the pressure and negative emotions she experiences having to work much harder in the industry than men and the pain she's felt during the years of her coming of age.

SZA - Ctrl (2017) My favourite R&B album of the past decade, SZA created one of the rawest, most emotional albums I've ever heard, reflecting on modern romance from a very personal and subjective point of view, gives this project a very aunthetic and deep feel you'd have to dig deep to find elsewhere. The album also underlines SZA's struggles as a modern woman, jealousy and the anxiety of being in your 20's. The project's classic R&B production combined with its features from artists like Travis Scott and Kendrick Lamar, really adds to an experience which could leave you heartbroken.

Isaiah Rashad - Cilvia Demo (2014) Although during the past year The Sun's Tirade has been my favourite and main album, it really is more of a vibe album and not as much as a personal abum as Cilvia. In Cilvia I found myself, Isaiah talks about his addiction issues, wanting to make it in a world full of hate, the horrible relationship with his father, thoughts of suicide, the lack of commitment he has in love and has received in his relationships and the social climate which makes him feel like he's less of a person. This isn't an album for everyone, but the people who can relate to what he's feeling will likely fall in love with this project.

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2010s: 20 - 16

20. maNga - “We could be the same” Turkey 2010

You could see it in my eyes, it should come as no surprise that the highest rock entry on this ranking is OF COURSE the avant garde rock entry. 😍

It certainly isn’t a stretch to call “We could be the same” avant garde because it’s an experimental extravaganza if ever there was, a rag-rag fusion of indie rock, industrial, hiphop and folk. 😍 More importantly one that WORKS. It’s really hard to put all of these genres together and not disturb the flow between each segment, yet that is exactly what maNga do. Their song runs like an oiled machine, supported by an excellent score of orchestral rock (the fiddle is an especially nice touch.) The snappy libretto keeps the ensemble well together, creating an atmosphere of pure coolness. 

This brave and creative entry is further supported by an act that has a well-defined aesthetic and artistic vision. (another sign of good avant garde. Pay attention because we are going to boot a LOT of them near the top of this ranking). MaNga don’t need much in terms of staging (since their song is already excellent), so a clever combo of strobe light seizure + dramatic helmet removal (FEATURING ACTUALLY CUTTING METAL AWAY WITH A BUZZSAW) is all it needs. 

FOR JUST ONE NIGHT WE COULD BE THE SAME

NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY. 

Eurovision is all about taking the hand that you’re dealt and running with it. maNga did exactly that. They weren’t vocally perfect but again, rock is a genre where it’s okay to sound unimpressive because the score will always out class you. They don’t have the best song, but again, it was something special, brave and inspired. Every small aspect of “We could be the same” comes together into a whole that is much bigger than the sum of its parts and for that, I shall always cherish them. 

________________________________________________________________

19. Joci Pápai - “Origo” Hungary 2017

[2017 review here]

I was worried that Joci’s NQ in the latest contest would tarnish his legacy, but if anything “Az én apám”’s failure at being entertaining only made me appreciate “Origo” even more.😍 Let us not beat around the bush. “Origo” is art. Like all art, it’s largely hit-or-miss. You either love this wonderful fusion of rap, self-references to Samuraihood and gypsy folk traditions, or you’re a unevolved troglodyte with subpar taste.😈 Lol I remember the music journalists and juries HATING “Origo” and... honestly, I get it. Yes. I can understand that deeply personal anectodes and proudly displaying your cultural heritage can fly over the heads of those narrow of mind. It’s fine. Not every song has complex meaning. You can vote for the “Replays” of this world at your heart’s content. ^__^

Music is at its core a form of expression, of conducting emotion with sound, of telling a story. We use words as a crutch for our empathy, but truly good music doesn’t need to rely lyrics in order to spread its message around. The true message always lies in the score. “Origo” shatters those language barriers by slowly,

 but steadily

unfolding a melancholic and touching narrative

that strikes everyone silent.

________________________________________________________________

18. Krista Siegfrids - “Marry me” Finland 2013

A WILD DINGDONG HAS APPEARED

Only logical we continue from artistic complexity to figurative cotton candy. 😍 but the same musical principles apply here as well, actually. “Marry me” has an upbeat tempo flanked by wedding bells that already carries its happy-go-lucky marriage vibe across even before the first words are spoken. 🤗 It is there to indulge and delight, which it does with all the zest and pluck you’d expect from Krista Siegfrids. 

Anyway, I’m sure this will shock you but I FLOOOOOOOOVE Krista Siegfrids soooooooo fucking muuuuuch as a human and I am NOT backing down on my fanboyism. She’s one of the few Eurovision Alumni that ALWAYS makes me happy whenever she appears, either as a force of HIGH FASHION/UMK hostess or as a resident melfest flop queen.😍  HON SNURRA MIN JORD!!!

DINGEDONG EVERY HOUR, WHEN YOU PICK A FLOWER~

As it happens, “Marry me” is the perfect canvas for her over-the-top, realhousewifesque personality. "Marry me” just delivers non-stop: it has a light-hearted, infectuously catchy beat, doubles down on lyrical and visual comedy, carries a happy vibed with a deliciously psychotic undercurrent, supplemented a superb act featuring a groom-into-bridesmaids twist and some hilariously opportunistic lgbtq pandering 😍 OH OH OH OH OH

DING DONG!!!1!1!1!11!1!!

ps: this being the entry that caused TRT to withdraw indefinitely because they can’t get on board with some hot girl-on-girl action. STAY PRESSED LOSERTWATS!!!

________________________________________________________________

17. Laura Tesoro - “What’s the pressure?” Belgium 2016

“YOU’VE GOT A STUPID SMILE 😄” -- Alexander Rybak, when praising Laura Tesoro during the NF. (😍)

Lol this is where my degrees of separation come in, because I’ve met several people that personally know Laura Tesoro and... with one exception they ALL fucking loathe her. 😍 (and aforementioned exception is her cousin 😍)  The general concencus re: Laura is that she’s an insufferable conceited bitch. Now, this could have easily ended up terrible if LauraLaura was That Unfounded Girl but... um,

can we say she has grounds to be a bit high on herself? She was fucking awesome in Stockholm. If anything Laura’s diva id helped “What’s the pressure”. First of all, there is the admirable confidence with which she takes the stage and completely NAILS every twist and turn with minimal effort. This is pure performance TALENT and if you can’t see that you’re Helen Keller. 

And second there’s the message behind “What’s the pressure”, which is uplifting and cheerful in the hands of a normal person, but when brought by a narcissist like Laura becomes a hysterical exhibit of concern-trollery: “HEY PERSON SUFFERING FROM ANXIETY ~I~ *NEVER* SUFFER FROM ANXIETY. LET ME TELL YOU WHY YOU SUFFER FROM ANXIETY AND I DON’T” (god what an obnoxious human 😍 LOVE HER. 😍) 

All in all, I think Laura has the justification she needs to have an ego, something her aforementioned haters (begrudgingly) admitted after seeing her own the live twice.🤭  She is a living conduit of confidence juju, a performance wonder, a Diva trapped in the body of an antropomorphic labrador. Dynamite comes in small packages and Laura Tesoro is more lit than Chinese Newyear fireworks.  🎇________________________________________________________________

16. Hovi Star - “Made of stars” Israel 2016

I’ll be honest, Hovi Star is one of my favourite human beings to ever participate in Eurovision.🤗  He has proven himself an UNSTOPPABLE force of sass, delivering interview gold on a terrifyingly consistent basis. There are enough examples, but the ones I’m going with are his impeccable Ira Losco Snatch Game  and his hilariously petty, one-sided feud with Douwe Bob (Dutch reporter: “what do you think about Douwe.” Hovi: “Oh I don’t think about him.😊 At all.🙂  Ever. 🙃 *hairflip*” god what a King of stonecold putdowns 😍)

Having said that, even though I loved Hovi as a ~human~ going in, I was still caught off-guard by how much I loved “Made of stars”. See, you know what I think about stripped down power-ballads: I don’t think about them. At all. Ever. *hairflip*. 

However, this fucking song

pulls all of my heartstrings

with mesmerizing efficacity.

“Made of stars” showcases the best of Israel: they excel at classical drama: well-choreographed and sentimental, “Made of stars” is a genuinely touching ballad which Hovi magically imbibes with the spirit of Conchita. He whips up emotional tension so thick only his wit can penetrate it.

As an entry “Made of stars” is very emotionally intelligent and so, so brave. It has clearly defined yet subtle undertones of homosexuality that make me feel represented and loved. It is staged in good taste, elegant, introverted and clever, yet accessible, direct and poignant. The middle-eight’s crescendo-into-starfall creates a bone-chilling moment of beauty, of pride, of empowerment. 

For such a simple entry, it delivers a lot of great things, proving once more: it’s not what you perform, but how you perform it.

And this update spelled the end for Turkey, Hungary, Finland and Israel.

TURKEY

Not much to say, honestly. Turkey have three entries in this decade and two of them were good. They are a hit-or-miss nation for me overall, mostly because i LOVE them in the 80s and 90s and somewhat dislike them in the 00s. What mostly bothers me is TRT’s attitude towards the rainbow community AND their self-entitlement towards the jury vote/big five. Both are highly toxic and I’d rather they keep on sitting out until they’re willing to become a healthy part of the Eurovision community again. 

HUNGARY

Hungary are a good Eurovision country and their statistics reflect that. Boggie of COURSE ruined it by being the worst, but she’s an exception, not the rule. They are a really good country for indie gems and hopefully they’ll get their shit together. Could make a nice outsider winner pick in the upcoming decade, who knows?

FINLAND

Finland is such an underrated eurovision nation. I mean, look at that chart, and then ponder on the fact, with 7 good entries out of 10,  they NQ’d six times and that NONE of their four qualifiers reached the top 10. Finland are bullied beyond belief and it fucking needs to end. 

ISRAEL

This looks more underwhelming on paper than it is in reality. Israel’s probelm is never the song. Their songs are nearly always good. The problem is the live performance, where they get their accents wrong (ie: Mei dying from wideshotitis, Kobi being reduced to a sobstory, Dana being a giant penis joke, Harel fucking up vocally and Netta being reduced to a parody of herself). They just need to lighten up more, which they did post-Nadav resulting in a few great entries, and Toy. Overall, Israel are one of my favourite Eurovision countries, and for good reason: when they are good, they are fucking excellent.