#not just to be ‘basic barbie’
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my only critique of the barbie movie is she should have become a gynecologist instead of just getting a vagina
#like i get that she became human but i thought it was supposed to be she found what she wanted out of life#and she wanted like her own dream? her own job? her own life?#not just to be ‘basic barbie’#i know she got to be barborah handler but she could have been barborah handler the gynecologist#all im saying#WAIT MY SECOND CRITICISM IS HOW DID THEY JUST MAGICALLY CONVINCE ALL THE BARBIES TO BE SUBMISSIVE???#explain why ken just mentioning the patriarchy made them brainwashed like what#also i wish the movie hadve given a real life solution instead of ‘distract men with infighting with you go vote for womens right’#barbie movie#this barbie is#barbie 2023#barbie ken#doll collector#moth.txt#movie review#barbie doll#margot robbie
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A Barbie AU where the Kens decide, in order to get some recognition, to get individual names.
Steve, who’s just a Ken very good with kids, is having an identity crisis after his Barbie, journalist Barbie, broke up with him.
Not even picking a name as unique and special as Steve, so much different than Ken, managed to cheer him up.
Everyone keeps saying he should be happy about the change, and discover who he is outside of Barbie’s orbit, but he can’t see what was so wrong in their relationship. He loved waiting all day for Barbie to look at him, even if it was for a brief second.
As if going through an existential crisis wasn't enough, he has to do it under the constant mocking of his archnemesis, Ke- Eddie.
Eddie, with his long curly and annoyingly gorgeous hair, who has a sense of style he would give all of his rollerblades for, and who's always there to notice whenever Steve makes a mistake.
Eddie even has his Barbie still by his side, cheerleader Barbie, and every time Steve sees them together he gets a sick feeling in his stomach, like a tummy ache. Doctor Barbie visited him a couple of times and found nothing wrong with him, he imagines he's a little jealous of Eddie for being with a Barbie.
Steve talks about this with Polyglot Barbie, his best friend, annoying her to death.
"Why are we talking about Ken, again?" she interrupts Steve's retelling of his last encounter with Eddie.
"It's Eddie" Steve corrects her.
"Right," she nods. She's very supportive of their silly-name-thing (how most Barbies call it), but she still has trouble remembering all the names, "why are we still talking about him?"
They're hanging out at the park, sitting under a tree, Barbie's leg on top of his, and they're holding hands. It's nice. Steve is happy to have a best friend like Barbie.
Steve looks up, meeting Eddie's gaze. He's sitting at one of the picnic tables not far away from them, doing nothing besides glaring at Steve.
Barbie squeezes his hand to get his attention back, and Steve looks away.
"Because he keeps tormenting me! he's even glaring at me right now, I'm gonna get stress wrinkles!" Steve finally replies, in a distressed tone.
"You're being dramatic," she says, matter-of-factly, "Eddie isn't so bad with you. You know, he kinda treats you like his Barbie."
If Steve had a beating heart, it probably would've stopped right at this second.
"What?"
"You know, he's always looking for you, he is always giddy whenever you give him a crumble of attention. He hangs out where you hang out... why do you think he's sitting all alone at a picnic table, just staring at you?"
"Maybe he's waiting for his girlfriend" he suggests.
"Are you talking about Cheerleader Barbie?" she giggles, "she's not his girlfriend, trust me."
"But he picks on me! all the time! Like this morning, I tripped and he made a comment about my legs!" He gestures at his legs with his free hand.
Barbie tilts her head to the side "you mean this morning at the beach when he held you in his arms for ten minutes to prevent you from falling and Barbie had to tell him to let you go?"
"… yeah” he manages to say. He hadn’t realized how long Eddie held him in his arms, he was upset about almost falling in front of him, but he also liked the feeling of his arms around him.
Everything feels different now.
Barbie's look softens "How does this make you feel?"
"I don't know" he answers, honestly "I just can't stop thinking about him."
A loud noise at their right startles them off of their conversation. They turn around to see Eddie lying on the floor, a trash can at his feet.
Steve doesn't give himself the time to realize that Eddie has probably heard their entire conversation and has tripped on that trash can because of it, he just rushes to Eddie's side to help him out.
Eddie stammers while Steve pulls him back up, not making much sense.
Steve is used to see Eddie as an intimidating guy, someone to compete with for Barbie’s attention. He never realized how much he liked to have Eddie’s attention instead, nor how he loved to give that attention back in equal amount.
“Nice legs” he tells him, repeating the same words Eddie told him that morning.
Eddie stops his incoherent stream of words when he hears him “what?”
“You heard me” Steve says.
“I did” Eddie admits. He pulls the trash can back up, to have an excuse to not look at Steve when he asks “you can’t stop thinking about me?”
For some reason, that’s the easiest question Steve has ever had to answer to “yes, I can’t.”
Eddie jolts back up startling Steve, the trash can falling out of his hands and hitting the ground once again.
“Cool” he says, using all of his willpower to hide his excitement by keeping a relaxed face, failing miserably.
“I guess” Steve grins. Knowing he has that effect on Eddie is making him the most confident he has ever felt in his life.
“So, since you can’t stop thinking about me…” Eddie repeats, in a tone that Steve would’ve mistaken for a mocking one until few hours ago “…we could hang out on the beach later. I’ll bring my guitar.”
“I’ll bring mine too then” Steve replies immediately.
Eddie panics “We can’t both have a guitar!”
Steve crosses his arms on his chest “who says that?”
Eddie opens and closes his mouth a couple of times then mutters, defeated, “fine.”
“Great!” Steve takes a step forward and gives Eddie a peck on his cheek “I’ll see you later.”
Eddie, who makes a face again trying to hide his excitement, nods and turns away “cool.”
He walks away slowly, towards the park’s exit. Right by the gate, he throws himself into an hedge. Steve can clearly hear him when he screams words along the lines of “FINALLY”, “I HAVE A DATE” and “SUBLIME”.
Steve turns to Robin who has witnessed the whole thing, while Eddie is still screaming random words from the bushes.
“I think I’m in love.”
#I’ve been wanting to write this since I saw the movie#but it never felt right#this is the best I could do lmao#in case it wasn’t clear I’m making fun of Steve for going from basic name to basic name lmao#I love him#I just think they’re neat#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#steve and eddie#steve x eddie#platonic stobin#barbie#Barbie au#Steddie au#steddie au Barbie
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They ended up seeing the double feature together
Draws my own version of a Barbie meme instead of the one that’s everywhere rn because I’m cooler (no
#good omens#my art#crowley#Aziraphale#this is basically that animal crossing vs. doom meme which I've drawn with them just with Barbie and Oppenheimer lol#But. Aziraphale WOULD enjoy Oppenheimer more and Crowley WOULD enjoy Barbie more and you know it#Also these movies release like a week before season 2 lmao#Hey everyone forget about the leak look at my new art#...not that I JUST drew it lol. I I was almost done yesterday before my photoshop crashed so I went to bed...
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just some ivy league kids trying to figure out necromancy
#the overall plot is pretty cool i just hate the characters now. they're cute though hi#they need sooo much revamping. or maybe i just explode this universe and move on to the next we'll see#anyway yeah the fourth pic that's evelyn she's dead and she was super obsessed w the occult and she's very manipulative and bad#that's her twin sister hazel in pic 5 they hated each other. she did not murder her. but should she have been allowed to i mean who's to sa#also HIIII LIAM MY VERY BELOVED (he's the first one <33 my oldest oc <33)#he basically grew up with me. my friend once said he's like my imaginary friend now that's what i call him djskfljds#while now i'm more like let's try to make characters that look like real people not barbie dolls#i do appreciate 13 yr old me just saying yeah liam's just like a hot sexy supermodel with zero imperfections. he's 6 foot 7#the others are evelyn’s friends liam just transferred here though. but HE’S trying to do necromancy for his cousin ppl think he killed#ffkldjflkdfds#ts4#ts4 cas#the sims 4
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You ate WHAT
#ehehe#ace attorney#ace attorney fanart#gyakuten saiban#narumitsu#wrightworth#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#Fanart#i feel like drawing miles and phoenix going to the barbie movie lmao#cuz i dont think ive seen anyone drawing that concept#which is disappointing tbh#or maybe someone did draw it and i just havent seen it#wait now that i look at it this might be lacking context...?#umm basically this was that dynamic where one is bad news the other is innocent sunshine character#but is secretly even more bad news than the other guy
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know that it’s not the point of the movie but I really hope they establish ken is indeed barbie’s boyfriend. she doesn’t need to kiss him or hold his hand or say I love you but we need that true devoted obsessed boyfriend + badass girlfriend to be canon because you know Ryan Gosling’s Ken would let Margot Robbie’s Barbie commit war crimes in the name of being a supportive partner
#more men who love their girl! not bffs not weird limbo space just this is my slightly cringe but lovely bf who supports me decking assholes#also like I want to see his Ken react to the phrase ‘boyfriend’. I think he’d explode into confetti#bet you ‘I’m just Ken’ will be an uplifting pop song dedicated to reminding Barbie he’s just Ken but she’s THEE Barbie#and he thinks she’s amazing ��#basically let’s do the Toy Story 3 Barbie/Ken dynamic again#barbie movie#barbie
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Had a realization about jarlaxle’s whole plot on the surface world…
#legend of drizzt#jarlaxle baenre#my roommate was actually the one who pointed out#that jarlaxle's journey to the surface world is basically just the ken part of the barbie movie#I haven't been the same since#it matches up too well#I mean they even take over and redecorate that castle in road of the patriarch(y)#mojo dojo vaasa house?? hello??#i need someone else to validate this vision with me lmao help#arrrt#'mine'#booksss
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hope they are slaying in these roleswap designs i drew for funsies
AND i compiled a bunch of roleswap au art/doodles from last year! not much thought was put into it, i just wanted to play dress up but i still think about it from time to time (doodles below!)
#mine#too tired to draw now. posting old art here (there is a lot)#the fits are basically colorswaps i wouldve put more thought into it but i was like they are my barbie dolls lets just have fun#i was gonna make an angsty comic too but then i snzzzzzzzz#one day. maybe#trying to draw ryuu looking mean and kzm in that one headshot looks very polite....cute!!!#and yes ..he would take the armguard...to remember his aibou... </3
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men hate me, women are repulsed by the mere sight of me, I am a wanted man in over 50 countries, I'm banned from most public institutions, I have violated the geneva convention for no less than 13 times and my cheekbones were sculpted by the gods.
#tag this as your favorite problematic man#i am just a guy#tom riddle#reigen arataka#dr albert krueger#elias bouchard#chris mclean#the corinthian#pitch black#jim moriarty#light yagami#patrick bateman#barbie preminger#tomura shigaraki#william afton#vecna#basically its evil loser boys with some kind of theatrics to them
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Do y’all ever look at Sif’s concept art and feel robbed?
#sif god of war#gow sif#it’s literally the elsa meme#how do you have designs as sick as this and go for something so basic!#god of war#god of war ragnarok#let her look old dammit!#why do all the other older gods get lines and wrinkles on her face#and she just has a smooth Barbie face
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How do you feel about staff's intent to remove reblog chains, considering your blog's basically an amalgamation of reblog chain long posts?
haha I’m actually legitimately terrified and trying really hard to not think about it :)
(seriously like i don’t wanna make a thing of it, but i’ve gone down the posts about it and like wtfff?!? why why why?!?? like I get their reasoning for it but it’s not accurate to the actual users of tumblr?? i’d rather scroll though 20 long posts than use the examples of what this would look like that I saw. but if this is wrong let me know…. but yeahhh i’m scared.)
#Tumblr heritage posts are built on reblog chains#it’s the charm of the website#like wtf#like I don’t wanna post this bc I know members of staff follow me#but if they see this and can alleviate mine (and basically everyone’s?!) fear then it’s worth it lol#but idk#also you know it’s bad when *i* comment on it bc I comment on nothing… so yeahh#don’t be mad at me Tumblr i’m just a scared tour guide barbie who wants to keep reblog chains and prev notes :(#ask#the hellsite answers#hellsite hall of fame curator’s bullshit#anonymous#reblog chains#Tumblr updates#reblog chain#Tumblr ™
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niche ass crossover fanart noone asked for and my main criticism of barbie movie in a nutshell
#barbie movie#gentlemen prefer blondes#ken#ken barbie movie#marilyn monroe#jane russell#I watched gentlemen prefer blondes with my friend the other day and my brain decided this was a necessary consequence#the fashion is glorious in this movie if you like women and/or fabulousness you absolutely need to watch it#I've decided to cast blonde ken as lorelei and simu's ken as dorothy#seeing as they match the hair colours and general personality types well enough x'D#also shout out to barbie fashion for basically already being stuck in the 50s which made these redesigns hecking easy#I'm finally watching live action one piece? what better time to make FULLY UNRELATED FANART#about one movie that is just out long enough to no longer be relevant and one that is literally 70 years old
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tfw the “random” imps you pulled away from exterminators are actually your daughter & the boy you treated like a son who thought you were dead for the last 15 years (aka, drawing what I saw in a dream that I’m now making into an entire Helluva au).
#in the dream Tilla then asked where Blitzo was & Barb & Fizz got angry & quiet respectively so I guess this is a pre-Oops au#basically how I’m writing it is she faked her death in the fire (to get away from Cash)#& then just never contacted her kids because too much time had passed & she thought it would hurt too much if she told them#so she just let them believe she was dead#this is really messy rn I just gotta do a lot of developing#thanks dreams love when I get an entire au made with them#I may finish this drawing later#fizzarolli#barbie wire#helluva boss tilla#helluva boss au#helluva boss#my art
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I love dolls and collecting them and playing with them. Do you all know this?
#realized i have not dollposted on here really.....i love dolls!!#particularly I love Monster High and Barbie but i'm currently getting into some more niche brands also#mystixx and novistar etc....some one-off brands are super fun like the zombie disney princesses#i kinda like eah in theory but most of the actual dolls are kinda. eugh. for me like their faces just dont do it#i like Kitty but she's kinda basically just evil Twyla so idk#but. yeah as a whole I love dolls!!!!!!
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Am I going to write a "but there was only one bed" fic is that going to be me right now
Because I'll do it! Watch me!!!
#down bad right now for basically slamming blorbos together like barbies#literally no reason for them to do it except me just being tired and stressed#primo x Edelweiss ghoul crackfic soon i guess
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I saw the Barbie movie earlier today, and I obviously have a lot of thoughts, but as a woman on her period right now, in excruciating pain, I have one major thing:
How would Barbie react to her first period?
I can just imagine her, after running to Gloria’s house, screaming and crying like-
“GLORIA! Help! I-I’m bleeding!”
And Gloria just has to sit her down and give her the same talk they gave us when we were twelve at school, and by the end, Barbie’s just lying on the floor, crying while Gloria hands her tissues.
“This WASN’T part of the DEAL! WHY WOULDN’T SHE TELL ME I WAS GOING TO HAVE TO DO THIS EVERY MONTH FOR THE NEXT THIRTY YEARS?”
“...Maybe she thought it would put you off?”
#barbie#barbie movie#barbie headcanons#barbie the movie#just ken#and ken#margot robbie#margot barbie#america ferrera#barbie gloria#barbie movie headcannons#seriously though she totally freaked out like a kid who's never heard of a period#because that's basically what it is-
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